#I finally write the chaptered fic and then it's all over and everyones gone already lmao

[candyunicornsateme]

Anyone ever just think of random fucking dialogue and jokes and random shit between characters?? The amount of goofy ass otp banters and shit I have drafted is embarrassing. What am I going to do with that?? Make them comics or fics??? Bitch. 

[withleeknow]

wishful thinking. (01)

chapter one: flutter

summary: the instruction was plain and simple: no strings attached. but you should’ve known from the beginning that it could never apply to you and him.

pairing: minho x f!reader rating: 18+ (minors dni) genre: friends to lovers, friends with benefits au, college au; fluff, angst, smut warnings: implied smut, aftercare, mentions of alcohol consumption, hints of oc being a little emotionally constipated lol, barely edited but we should all be used to seeing that from me atp word count: 2.3k note: eeeek my first lino series is here 🥺 there's not much substance in the first part bc we're mostly just setting things up. thank you to my wifeus in the obs server (you know who you are ofc) for being the best cheerleaders, bc i don't think i would've gone through with writing this fic if it wasn't for you. fwb lino probably would've had to gather dust in the attic if you hadn't encouraged me to write him. thank you and love you <3

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

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Tomorrow when it's over and we're sober I just want to believe that you'll miss me But I shouldn't 'cause we're just friends Now we're day drunk in the back seat of a taxi And you're telling me you wanna kiss me But we shouldn't 'cause we're just friends

Just Friends - Virginia to Vegas

“Minho.”

“Hmm?”

“Get off of me.”

He doesn’t, of course. Because Minho is stubborn and Minho does whatever he wants sometimes. “No,” he mumbles against your neck, pressing a soft kiss there that makes the stupid thing in your chest flutter against your will. You don’t let yourself indulge in the feeling for too long though, only a second. “You’re too warm.”

“Min,” you scold lightly, but you can’t say that you don’t enjoy having his body on yours like this. It’s different than when you’re having sex, because this is more intimate somehow, just him holding you - or rather, resting the entirety of him on top of you like the human version of a weighted blanket. Wham! Bam! Thank you, ma’am! but with a Minho-esque flare that he doesn’t have to appease you with, but chooses to anyway.

One of the reasons why you don’t let yourself relish in the moment is because intimacy isn’t what you signed up for. In fact, it’s the complete opposite of what you both agreed on. No strings attached - it was the only instruction, plain and simple.

And so you nudge his shoulder again, making him sigh and begrudgingly sit up, in all of his post-sex glory. Disheveled fluffy hair, a couple of fading marks on his neck courtesy of you, kiss-swollen lips and a kind of glow that you’re fairly certain matches your own.

“Hang on,” Minho says, I’ll get you a towel.”

He quickly throws on his boxers - previously discarded on the floor - and heads to your bathroom. He returns to your side just a couple minutes later with said item in hand, dabbing the soft cloth at your core tenderly.

“You okay?” he asks. “I wasn’t too rough on you tonight?”

You like the aftercare, and how tender he always is with you. You’re not sure if that’s the extra effort that he puts in with everyone he’s ever hooked up with, or if you two are just naturally comfortable around each other, but it’s reassuring. It’s nice to know that this agreement between the two of you hasn’t tarnished your friendship.

Yet?

Yet.

“You were perfect,” you tell him with a coy smile. “I was the one who asked for it anyway.”

Minho chuckles, then pats your bare thigh for good measure as he takes one final swipe at your core before chucking the towel into the laundry basket in the corner of your room.

He plops onto your bed again, propping himself on an elbow so he could look down at your face, highlighted only by the dim light of the small lamp on your bedside table. The way that his bicep flexes still puts you in a bit of a trance, even though you’ve seen it probably hundreds of times already.

“You know, I was pretty surprised when you asked me to try that with you,” he says, eyeing your mouth again. “Didn’t think you’d be down for experimenting new things with me.”

“Well, who else am I supposed to try things out with?”

You’re not even sure what you meant - the words just rolled off your tongue - but you don’t miss the instantaneous look of pride on his face. To hear something like that from you is clearly an ego boost for him.

You don’t miss the subtle blush that tints both of his cheeks and the top of his ears either, but you don’t dwell on it for very long.

Come to think of it, you don’t let yourself indulge in a lot of things when you’re around him.

His free hand comes up to draw imaginary patterns along your arm, starting from your shoulder, down to your elbow, then across your forearm until you could feel his fingers on the back of your hand. “I forgot to mention earlier,” he says, tracing what you think is an invisible outline of a heart on your skin. “Hyunjin knows.”

“Knows what?” you ask.

“He knows that we’re hooking up,” Minho tells you, then clarifies when he sees your eyes widening. “Well, he doesn’t know that it’s you. He knows that I’m hooking up with someone.”

You mimic his position, propping yourself up on one elbow so your face is more leveled with his, evidently alarmed at the mention of your friend finding out about a secret that you've been trying to hide for months now.

No, a secret would imply that you have more things you have to conceal. It’s probably more accurate to refer to it as the secret.

Sometimes, even you yourself wonder why this is something you need to hide from everyone. 

It’s not like you’re living in the Victorian era where people are scandalized by the appearance of a bare knee. It’s not like your friends are prudes either; most of them have had their fair share of friends with benefits. It’s all casual, all in good fun.

But maybe it’s because it’s Minho that you’re currently… preoccupied with, that makes you feel less inclined to share with the rest of the group.

If any of them catches wind of this, you know they’ll have loads to say about it, starting with a thorough but well-intentioned lecture from Chan. 

You were good friends before your thing started.

You had a friendship. You had something to lose.

You don’t know why you would even risk it in the first place.

It just happened.

One particularly lonely night. You had some alcohol in your system, and that always made you more sentimental than usual. There was something romantic in the air, or maybe that’s just what you thought looking at everything through the lenses of three glasses of wine. Not drunk, just buzzed enough to be reminded that Minho was one of the most beautiful people you’d ever laid your eyes upon.

But the accumulation of all those factors didn’t matter - couldn’t have mattered - more than the fact that he was there for you.

He listened to you brood over how suffocated you felt, how stagnant your life was, how nothing seemed to be going the way you wanted no matter how hard you tried. He didn’t offer you unsolicited advice, didn’t make you feel silly for moping. He was a soothing presence and that was enough for you.

Sometimes, your friends liked to say that you two would make a good couple because of how compatible you were. Chan once commented that you and Minho were a perfect fit, and that was what kept plaguing your mind moments before you kissed Minho for the first time.

Maybe you’re the missing piece of my puzzle, you had thought back then. My perfect fit.

You had pulled away after a couple of seconds, mortified, but his reaction was immediate. He’d chased after your lips again, no questions asked.

You knew it was a rash decision, spurred on by the heat of the moment and cheap convenience store rosé. Minho was so… goddamn addictive after just one taste that you couldn’t resist anymore. Having him felt like you finally had a taste of water after spending years deprived.

Needless to say, he ended up in your bed that night. The rest is… well, it doesn’t take a genius to deduce the subsequent series of events that led you here.

“Elaborate,” you say with an arch of your eyebrow.

“You texted when he was hanging out at my place and I was in the bathroom.” Minho shrugs. “That nosy little thing. He scrolled through quite a bit of our texts too.”

You frown. “He read our texts but he doesn’t know it’s me?”

“I don’t have you saved as your name.”

“Then what do you have me saved as?”

Up until now, you never even thought about this, and you’ve always just assumed that you’re in his contacts under your name, like he is in your list. Well, technically you have him saved as ‘Min’, but anyone who comes across it could still easily identify who you’re referring to.

Minho purses his lips, contemplating for a minute before he ultimately decides to withhold this information from you. He gives you a teasing smile, another shrug, before saying, “That’s for me to know and for you to find out when the time comes.”

“I don’t get to know what my own name is in your phone? Even Hyunjin knows, apparently.”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t know it’s you, so what does he really even know?”

“But I have a right-”

“Shhh.” Then he’s leaning forward to shush you with a quick kiss to your lips. It does the job, because you shut right the hell up. It surprises you every time he kisses you when you’re not in the middle of sex. Moments like these are rare, but you’re always rendered speechless by how casually he does it, how familiar the simple action is even when it shouldn’t be, and most of all, you’re dumbstruck by just how right it feels.

“Am I gonna see you before Yeonjun’s party on Saturday?” he asks, like nothing even happened. Your lips are tingling from a simple peck. It’s so silly, considering how just half an hour ago, he was literally inside of you, pounding you into oblivion until you had tears streaming down your face. Until you were crying out his name like it was the only word you’d ever known.

You quickly regain your composure. “I don’t know, maybe. I have a final paper to finish so I’ll probably be holed up here or at the library,” you tell him. “Maybe we’ll catch each other on campus. But if not, then, yeah, I’ll see you at the party.”

Minho seems disappointed, evident from his immediate and adorable pout. 

“It’s just a few days.” You roll your eyes harmlessly, lying back down again to snuggle into your pillow. “You’ll live.”

“Will I?” he grumbles. “What am I supposed to do for four whole days?”

“Don’t you have your finals too?”

“All presentations and papers. Finished the last one today.”

“Oh,” you say, mildly impressed by the fact. You always forget how studious he actually is. “Internships?”

“Already sent in my applications.”

“Changbin says you’ve been talking to that girl Hana in your class.”

You don’t know why you brought it up. You don’t even like hearing the words coming out of your own mouth.

Minho makes a face, almost like he’s taken aback that Changbin would even tell you that. “Because we’re in the same group for our final presentation,” he informs you.

“She seems nice, from what I’ve heard about her. Seems like she has a big fat crush on you too.”

“Not to sound mean, but I don’t really care about that.”

A feeling blooms in the pit of your stomach, a feeling that you cannot and will not give a name to. There’s just something about the way he said it, steadfast, without any hesitation.

“It does make you sound a bit mean,” you tell him.

“I’m just not interested in her.”

“I don’t want to hold up the Minho train if there are other options out there that you want to explore.”

Do you mean it? Yes and no. Part of you wants to be nosy and prod until he fesses up about a potential love interest in his life - if there even is one - so that you could be a good friend that tell him to just go for it, but your curiosity is eclipsed by your selfishness, because you realize that you don’t really want to know if it means the end of this.

Are you being a hypocrite?

Yeah, probably.

He bites his bottom lip as if in thought, just briefly, before he rolls over to lie on his back, staring up at your boring ceiling. “I told you, I don’t care. I’m not interested in any other girl,” he says.

Realistically, you know there will be a finale. It’s only inevitable. One day, he’ll get a girlfriend, or you’ll get a boyfriend - the former seems more likely than the latter - and this arrangement between the two of you will have run its course. Null and void.

It’s part of the reason why you never let yourself relish in him, because you will only be thoroughly disappointed when he gets taken away from you.

As if he’s ever been yours to begin with.

You’ve never belonged to him either.

Neither of you owes the other anything at all.

You blink away the dazed look in your eyes, humming a noncommittal noise in irresolute agreement, before reaching for your phone to check the time. It’s not that late, half an hour shy of midnight, and his place isn’t that long a walk from yours. You know full well that it isn’t much of an excuse, and yet…

“It’s late.”

“Can’t I stay over?” He turns his head to look at you. “I’ll be good. I’ll just sleep next to you.”

“No can do,” you say. “I have a class at 10AM.”

“Me too. I can walk you to campus,” he insists.

There’s something unspoken in his gaze that you can sense but can’t translate. It’s been happening more often lately - you not being able to read him as easily as you could before. You have to admit that it makes you a little unsettled. The unknown that swims in the dark sepia of his eyes.

But maybe you’re overthinking this. Maybe you’re making something out of absolutely nothing.

“Go home, Minho,” you decide, leaving him no room to protest. The instant kicked puppy look on his face makes you feel a little bad, thus prompting you to continue, “I’ll try to see you on campus, okay?”

He looks at you for another moment before he sits up unwillingly. It seems like he has something else to say - something other than a butthurt comment about being bored out of his mind over the next few days - but in the end, he gives up. You notice the way his shoulders slightly slump as he exhales, “Okay.”

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 27.11.2023]

[the1975attheirverybest]

Being Funny In A Foreign Language

Chapter 10- When We Are Together

A/N: the VERY LAST FINAL CHAPTER is here. I hope you like it! Feedback is appreciated and encouraged. Thank you so much to everyone who has read and provided feedback on the chapters of this fic. It was fun to write. Yall made it fun.

Warnings: kink. Smut. A single mention of ADHD. A single mention of addiction recovery.

——

Even though she knew that it was physically impossible, Amelia swore she’d developed superhuman hearing to be able to hear Matty’s conversation with the tall, beautiful blonde woman across the bar. Even over the ambient chatter of the place, it was obvious that the two were flirting. That much she didn’t need to hear. She knew, from experience, how smooth and charming Matty could be when he really wanted to. Not that he had to try, really. Looking the way he does, in the all black outfit, especially that leather jacket he had on, anyone with a pulse would want him.

After what felt like an inappropriately long time, Matty finally meandered back over to the table, his refilled drink in hand, sliding back into the conversation with George that they’d put on hold earlier. Amelia couldn’t believe that he didn’t even bother to look her way of explain his delayed return. She tried to let it go. And she would’ve succeeded, if it weren’t for the fact that the fabulous blonde suddenly approached their table, leaning into Matty’s seat to whisper something into his ear. Amelia tried to employ her super hearing abilities but all she could hear was Matty’s giggle as the woman touched his arm. She almost walked away, but then she looked at Matty again, smiling,

“Do you have a girlfriend, Matty?”

Matty’s smile slowly faded as the question set in. He turned to Amelia, shooting her an apprehensive look. Her eyes darting away, she stirred her drink with its straw, pretending that she hadn’t just been eavesdropping with every fiber of her being.

“Erm….no.” Matty looked up at his new blonde friend, “ I don’t have a girlfriend….it seems.”

The woman said something about how shocking it is that a man like him wasn’t already in a relationship. “Guess it must be my lucky day.” She grabbed his phone off the table, putting her number in. “You should text me sometime.”

Underneath the table, Amelia’s hands itched to get a hold of Matty’s body. His admirer was hardly gone before she had the idea to get back at him by running the tip of her shoe along his leg. He jolted at the surprise sensation at first, confused, assuming she’d accidentally bumped her leg into his, he brushed it off. But as Amelia got bolder, her leg moved further up his body, stopping at the knee a few times. She could see him glancing over at her out of the corner of his eye. He was beginning to catch on. Spurred on by his continued composure, she hiked her foot up higher, first onto his thigh, then, finally, onto his groin. It was a subtle maneuver. Risky. She had to lean forwards, resting her arms on the table to scoot forwards and reach him. Any abrupt motions and it would be obvious that something was going on with her legs. So it required finesse. A level of calm that she had no idea she could muster. Jealousy really is a powerful thing.

She was entertained by the way that Matty’s hands gripped the edges of table until his knuckles had turned white. The coy smile of acknowledgement he’d flashed her earlier had disappeared. He sipped on his drink to distract himself, but the more she rubbed him, the harder it got for him. In more ways than one.

“Night Mark! See you in the morning!” She bid him goodnight sweetly. The wholesome smile dropped from her face as soon as Mark’s door clicked shut. She pushed Matty up against the wall, in the middle of the hallway, her hands, at long last, all over him.

Matty willingly allowed himself to be handled by her in whichever way she liked, his body moving in sync with hers. He rested his back against the wall, eagerly parted his lips, let her bite and nip at them, moaning and whining into the kiss. Vying for more control, she brought her hands up to his face, fixing him in place as the kiss grew longer, needier. When she pulled away from him, it was aggressive, like tearing flesh away, the suddenness left Matty breathing audibly, hungry for more, reeling at the loss of her body overpowering his. He felt lighter without her chest pressing into his, constricting the air in his lungs, and he didn’t enjoy the newfound lightness. He found it overwhelming. Like a piece of paper without a paperweight, blowing in the wind, his knees bent slightly before he regained balance.

They barely made it a few steps down the hallway before Matty found himself pinned against the wall again. This time, Amelia’s hands were around his neck, her hips pushing against his, a knee dangerously close to his groin.

Shamelessly, Matty pushed his hips into hers, rubbing against the edge of her knee for some friction.

She gasped when she noticed what he was up to, stopping her kissing and backing off of him. “Tsk tsk tsk. Matty! Are you already- Jesus Christ, you impatient little- what do you think you’re doing here, hmm?”

Matty smiled, a wide, toothy smile.

“Oh, you better believe I’m about to wipe that smug look off your face in a few moments. Room

Key?”

He pulled the key out of his pocket, grabbing her hand and rushing them both towards the room.

“On your hands and knees, c’mon.” Amelia pointed with the cane to the spot where she wanted Matty positioned.

“Okay, but- but- erm before you- hit me, can I just say I’m sorry, I didn’t know it would bother you.” Matty proceeded to kneel and get on all fours, in nothing but his underwear, as he spoke.

“What?! How dumb to you think I am? You’re going with that as an excuse???”

“Genuine! I- didn’t want to be presumptuous. You didn’t seem particularly bothered by-“

“You’ve got to be fuckin kidding me.” Amelia laughed in disbelief.

“I’m not kidding-“

“Enough out of you! Lose the underwear. I want nothing separating between you and this cane.”

“Fuck.” He shivered, “this is going to hurt.” He mumbled under his breath. But Amelia heard it.

“Would you rather I use the belt? Flogger? What hurts most?”

“Cane hurts most.”

“Cane it is, then.”

Amelia raised the cane in the air, but before she could swing it back down over him, Matty interrupted.

“Erm- I am- to count out each hit?”

“Right. Yes.”

“Okay.” His head dropped.

“You know the rules, yes?”

“Mhm. Count them out. Say thank you after each time, and tap out if I need it.”

“Exactly.”

He glanced over his shoulder “I really am sorry.”

Which prompt her to sling the cane and hit him instantly. The surprise of it made the pain even worse she literally heard the moment that the pain knocked the wind out of his lungs, muting his scream.

He took a moment to breathe, and then with a shaky voice. He started to count. “One. Thank you. Please- m- May I have another?”

“Straighten your back, Matty.” She demanded.

“Right. S-sorry.”

“Quit saying that!” She brought the cane down on him again. Tears quickly pooled in the corners of his eyes.

By the tenth strike, Matty was crying. By the twentieth, she’d had asked, “who do you belong to? That woman at the bar? Any random girl that pays you any attention?”

He shook his head, unable to stop the tears long enough to answer.

By the thirtieth hit, Matty was out of it, deep in subspace, head full of pain and pleasure, he’d long lost count. Instead, he had, for some inexplicable reason, taken to repeatedly whimpering “I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours.” Over and over again.

When her own arm began to hurt, Amelia dropped the cane, her anger disappearing with it, she hurried over to Matty’s body, which had collapsed into a mess on the floor as soon as she’d stopped.

“Hey, hey, Matty? Eyes on me, babe.”

Relieved to see him attempting a smile, she kissed his forehead gently, then helped him sit up. “You good to keep going?”

“Yeah, I’m alright.”

“Good. Cuz I’m going to fuck you into submission.”

“Open up for me.” The dildo strapped to Amelia’s waist rested against his lips. Hesitantly, Matty opened his mouth and took it in. Bit by bit, at first, adjusting to its size, then, when Amelia felt comfortable that he was ready, she held him by the back of the head, and thrusted completely into his mouth, getting closer and closer, with each push, to reaching the back of his throat.

Matty moved his head, sucking in, his cheeks hollowed, his tongue moving around the you in his mouth. His breathing shortened but Amelia wouldn’t allow him any relief, even as he was gagging, drool dripping down his chin, eyes watering, she kept him there, admiring the dazed look in his eyes as he stared up at her, unflinchingly, as if to show her with his gaze, how good he was being.

Matty coughed and heaved as Amelia pulled away gently patting his back? Urging him to get into position. He wiped his own saliva off his face with the back of his arm before crawling on his knees to the top of the bed, lying on his stomach.

“Hold on. Need a pillow or something under your waist.” She slid a pillow under him to prop him up and protect his back from any extra pressure and Matty, in his subservient state, thought the gesture was the kindest thing in the world. Smiling and melting into the bed, he whispered “thank you. So much.”

He felt the cold sensation of the bit of lube that Amelia had applied to his skin, pushing a finger into his hole to make sure he was relaxed and ready, then an immense pressure. He moaned as she pushed into him, the feeling overwhelming. Slowly and carefully, Amelia slid all the way in and began to thrust, listening to him mumble unintelligibly.

“Oh- my- fuck…so. Fuckin. Tight.” He winced every time that anything came into contact with the fresh cane welts on his ass, pain mixing with pleasure. Just what he needed to overwhelm and shut down his brain.

“Tell me, Matty, who do you belong to?”

“You. Oh. My. God. I- I belong to- to you. I’m all yours. No one else’s” he rambled on.

“Who owns this ass?”

“Fuck!!! Ah- feels so good…”

Realizing that he was a bit too lost in pleasure, she slapped his injured ass causing him to scream. “I asked you a question. Who owns this ass? Who owns your pleasure, hmm? Tell me.”

“Oh godddd. You do! You. Always you. Nobody else makes me feel like you do. I- ahhhh…don’t care how many girls try…how may women I see around me- it’s always been you. I’ve belonged to you even before I knew it.”

His broken answer satisfied her, putting out the fire within. She smiled down at his supple body, her heart warming at the sight.

“That’s right. It’s just you and me. No one else.” She stated, more for herself than for Matty who had already surrendered his whole being to her.

“A- Amelia? It feels - too good. I- am so close.”

Hearing that, she became determined to take him over the edge. “Oh yeah? Better brace yourself then baby.”

She thrusted into him, harder and faster. His moaning turned to crying, and then screaming.

“Cum for me, Matty. Let go. You’ve earned it.”

She tucked a strand of his hair behind his ear, looking into his eyes. “What is it?” She whispered, kissing him.

“Hmm?”

“You look like you wanna say something. What’s on your mind?”

Matty’s eyes darted away. “Well, I just- I want to apologize about the girl in the bar.”

“You don’t have to. It’s over now. You’ve redeemed yourself.”

“No, I know. And- don’t get me wrong, I am sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. Genuinely. But-“

Amelia’s brows furrowed. “But what?”

“be fair, we never actually said anything about- I mean…a- are we in a relationship? Are we going out? Like, dating?”

Amelia stuttered, finding herself speechless. She couldn’t believe that he even had to ask. Though, strictly speaking, he was right. There was never a conversation. But only because she’d assumed that there didn’t need to be one. That it was obvious.

“Am I your boyfriend, Amelia?” He smiled, hopeful, at the sound of his own words. “Is that what I am? Cuz I quite like the sound of that.” He giggled.

“Yes, Matty.” she rolled her eyes, faking annoyance. “You are my boyfriend.”

“Hold on! If I’m your boyfriend….that makes you…??”

She shook her head, “that makes me your girlfriend, yes.”

Matty couldn’t help the smile that lit up his whole face. “How cool is that? Hello, yes, this is my girlfriend, Amelia.” He laughed “everybody give it up for my girlfriend.”

“What-“

“My girlfriend is here tonight. There she is, shout out to her what a beautiful-“

“Are you…practicing for live shows? Right now? In the middle of-“

“She’s looking beautiful tonight don’t you guys think? Look at her- oh wow. I’d you’ll excuse me. Think I’m gonna kiss her now.” He leaned in, locking their lips together.

***

Matty heard her spring to her feet, as soon as he walked through the door even before he could see her.

“Hi. You’re back.” She rushed over to him. “So? What’d the doctors say? Do they know what’s wrong?”

“Well-“

“Did they write you a prescription for anything? Do they think you’ll feel better soon?”

Matty squeezed his eyes shut, rubbing his temples. He could feel the onset of a throbbing headache.

“Amelia, please. Calm down. You’re suffocating me.”

Seeing the way that her face dropped in response made him instantly regret his words.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean it.” He said softly, extending his hand out for her to take it and pulling her to the bed with him. He throw himself onto it, with Amelia standing in the space between his legs, still holding hands.

“So…” he sighed loudly. “They said it’s definitely the mental illness.”

“Good! That’s good right!” She caught herself being her enthusiastic and tried to hold back.

“Yeah, I mean, the upside of that is- soon as I get that shit under control, everything else goes back to normal. Well, you know. As normal as can be for someone who’s a little bit fucked up.”

This time, Amelia managed to hold her tongue. Smiling and nodding along.

“The thing is, finding the right medicine can be a while.”

“Yeah! I looked into it and I read that- sorry. Sorry. You talk. I’ll listen.”

“No; it’s just….on top of that being a general challenge for everyone, well, recovering addicts like myself are generally advised to steer away from certain pills. And then there’s the ADHD….and finding the right dose or whatever. It’s a whole fuckin thing. Gives me a headache if I’m being honest with you.” He was ready to change the subject. “Just…whatever. Can we do the kissing now?”

“Matty! This is good. You’re doing the responsible thing.”

He pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her waist, “I know.” They kissed. “And I have you to thank for that.” Matty paused again for another quick kiss. “You- make me a better person. You make it feel like there’s a version of life where maybe I get to feel better.” This time, it was Amelia who leaned in for a kiss. “But I really don’t wanna talk about this boring shit. Makes me feel unsexy and old and broken. Let’s…be young and alive. Let’s fuck! Over and over again.”

***

Louis looked at his brother, incredulous. “I can’t believe you’re actually doing this.” He pulled out the ring box from his pocket placing it, carefully, into Matty’s open palm.

Matty’s heart skipped a beat at the feeling over the velvet container in his hand. He popped it open, hardly believing his eyes. “It’s just like I remember it. Only smaller.”

“I know. Always looked bigger on nana’s finger.”

Matty tore his eyes away from the ring to look at his brother. “Louis, I think it’s us who were smaller.” Cautiously, he snapped the box shut.

“I can’t believe you’re marrying Amelia!” Louis nudged him with his elbow, giggling uncontrollably.

“Well, I haven’t asked her yet. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“Right! Have you decided about how you’re gonna do it?”

“Yeah, the boys are helping. I think-“ Matty smiled as the realization hit him. He was talking about proposing. To Amelia. Changing both of their lives. He blushed, giggling softly.

“Well??! Go on! What’s the plan?” His brother stared at him, impatient.

“Right. Yes. I’m taking her on our first official, like, ‘date.’ Her favorite restaurant. And, while we’re out of the house,” Matty’s heartbeat pounded stronger as he spoke. Visualizing the moment in his mind with a smile

On his face. “The guys are going to get in there and arrange the flowers and candles. Hand picked by mum of course. Then I’ll let them know to get the fuck out of there before we get back. And I’ll just…do it as soon as we walk in.”

***

“Sir?” The waiter raised a single eyebrow, hoping the heavy pause was enough to nudge Matty into politeness.

“Sorry, mate. Just 10 more minutes? She’ll be here! Any second now.”

“Apologies sir, but- we’ve got reservations…”

“Look, look! She’s texted!” Matty pulled out his his phone. He did, indeed, just receive a text from Amelia.

Please don’t hate me. I’m so sorry. I can’t come. Working all night. They hated all the designs I showed them and the deadline is Thursday.

We’ll have our first date someday….soon. Dont wait up for me, I’ve got my own keys. Love you.

Matty felt his heart shatter in his chest. He stood up from his chair. “Well. I guess you get your fuckin table - sorry. Shouldn’t swear in this fine dining establishment….im goin home. Tables free.”

As he walked to the train station, he texted the boys to undo their work, recollect everything, and leave.

***

“Well, so, what’s the plan now?” George asked, handing Matty a drink.

“He chooses another day and we start over, obviously.” Adam chimed in; he received a supporting nod from Louis.

“I don’t know…this feels…wrong.”

“What does?” Ross muted the tv that had been murmuring in the background, and leaned closer.

“It feels like bad luck to just….re-light the candles and re-scatter flower petals.”

“So?? Buy new ONES MATTY!” Louis had clearly gotten slightly too invested in this proposal plan, the thrill of being the ring delivery man getting to his head.

“What if I just picked a new plan? An island getaway. Like over the weekend or something. After this- this design she’s working on is finished, she’s going to need a break anyway. A beach proposal would be nice?”

“Shall I find some options? Islands and hotels?” Louis pulled out his phone, and without waiting for confirmation from Matty, began digging.

“So….what’re we going to do with the several million tons of flowers that you’ve ordered?” George asked, pointing to the giant pile of flowers in the middle of the room.

“Well you obviously can’t leave them here. I can’t let Amelia see them. Take them home. You each give some to your partners or something. Take them to DH. or find a grandmothers grave or something. I don’t fuckin know. Just- get them outta here.”

***

“Thank you, honey.” Amelia whispered as Matty brought her some coffee in bed, kissing her forehead before climbing back under the duvet to sit next to her.

“Thanks for letting me sleep in” she spoke into her mug, taking the first sip. “I’m so looking forward to work slowing down a bit. This week was mental!”

Matty couldn’t help the involuntary smile that always took over his face whenever he heard her voice, saw her face, or was in her presence. Even disheveled and tired, morning breath and all, she was the most perfect woman he’d ever seen.

“Speaking of rest. What do you say to a quick trip somewhere. Maybe the weekend? We could extend our stay if you fancied. But just a few days off the grid. Reckon it’d do you some good. No work. No email. No indecisive clients changing their minds at worst possible time?”

Amelia squealed excitedly, setting her coffee down on the nightstand to avoid spilling it. “Ooo what’d you have in mind?”

“I was thinking…somewhere warm? A beach maybe?”

“Oh.”

Her lackluster response confused Matty.

“What? You don’t like the idea?”

“It’s- just….beaches need warm weather. It’s the dead of winter.”

“I’m sure we could find someplace warm. We’re not limited by geography. We could go anywhere!”

She bit her lower lip, avoiding his eyes.

“You don’t look enthused.”

She cocked her head, somewhat embarrassed. “I appreciate the idea. I really do. You’re so sweet to think of this. But- well- international travel- you’re always on tour and I- it’s just stressful !”

A strange sense of doom began to set in Matty’s heart. But he was careful not to let any of it seep out to Amelia, keeping a smile on his face.

“Alright. That’s okay. We’ll find something else to do-“

“I’m sorry! You were trying to be sweet and romantic and I’m such a downer!” Amelia leaned into him, clinging to his chest guilty and desperate.

“Don’t be sorry. This- this was meant to be for you. So, if going somewhere far away stresses you out, then what’s the point of doing it. We’ll just do something else. It’s fine.” He kissed her head, throwing his arm around her. “Whatever you like. Where would you like to go?”

“Honestly? Nowhere. Just wanna be here. With you. Our bed is perfect.”

“Well, then, there’s no place else I’d rather be.”

Matty sighed, making a mental note to inform Louis that Plan B was a no-go as well.

***

“We should get a puppy.” Matty said from the other side of the couch, a joint between his fingers.

“Pardon?” She giggled, setting her book down and crossing her legs.

“Puppy. You and me. It’d be great, don’t you think?”

“Matty, need I remind you of the dogs you’ve attempted to own? And how they’ve all ended up in other people’s homes? You’re basically an illegal dog fostering operation. You just get dogs and then place them with people who never signed up to be dog owners in the first place.”

Matty laughed, that long drawn out laugh he always did when he was just a tiny bit stoned.

“Yeah, I do that quite a bit. don’t I?”

“Mhm.”

He brought the joint to his lips, taking a drag. “Well, usually it’s cuz I’m on tour so much. But if we adopted the dog together that wouldn’t be a problem. You’d be here.”

“Hmmm” Amelia considered the idea for a moment. Picturing a sweet fur baby in the middle, between the two of them, snoozing on this couch made her heart flutter. “That would be cute, actually.”

“Unless, of course, I decide to hire you again. To come on tour with me.” Matty mused.

“You assume I’d just drop everything and do it.”

“Yeah but maybe we could bring the dog with us? Reckon we could sort it out….”

“I don’t know. Two people sharing a pet is always dangerous….” Amelia said, second-guessing the idea.

“There’d be vaccines and shit. And we’d have to get it a passport. Do dogs need passports?”

They were clearly branching off into two separate conversations by now.

“Matty, seriously. Isn’t it too soon? I mean, what if we broke up? It’s like…like having. Child. I couldn’t handle separating it from one of us. Having to see it on certain days. It’ll pee everywhere. Even potty-trained pets can start shitting everywhere when their routine is uprooted. We can’t do that to a dog!”

Matty let her words hang in the air for a moment, a smile on his face.

“Fine. Then marry me.”

“Excuse me?”

“Easy enough solution. Marry me.”

Amelia’s mouth fell open. She stared at Matty, stunned. Unclear on how serious he was being. Even if it was a joke, no immediate retort was coming to her mind at the moment.

Matty took another drag of his blunt and then sat up straight to be able to slip his hand into the pocket of his joggers, pulling out the ring box.

Amelia’s eyes tracked his movements, widening in shock at the sight of the box.

“Hold on, sorry” matty whispered, setting his joint down. “Right, then.” He cleared his throat, got off the couch getting down on one knee.

“Amelia, my love, will you marry me?”

“M- matty!”

“I love you. You make me a better man. You’re my best friend. You’re my soul. My muse and my critic and my everything. I wanna be with you forever. Do you wanna be with me forever?”

“You’re insane! Matty! We’ve never even been on a real fuckin date. ‘What happened to- to- get dinner with me sometime.’ ‘See you on Tuesday.’ What the fuck?” She laughed, running out of breath, her face felt hot like fire.

“I think we can both agree we’re way past that.” Matty said, perfectly calm. “You…you know me. You know what I’m like when I’m at my very best and when I’m at rock bottom. In fact, you’ve seen me at some dark and pretty fuckin pathetic moments. And you never turned your back on me. You- make me feel like I might get better. Anytime that I’m with you. Around you. Any time that we’re together. It feels like maybe there’s a version of me that gets better. You make me wanna be a man. As for me? I know you.” His smile widened as he prepared his next words,

“I know how you like your coffee; I know that you like it when people notice your makeup. Even though you try not to draw too much attention to the effort you put into it. . I know that you love your little sister more than anything. But you’re insecure about not being there for her as much cuz she lives so far away, so….sometimes you overcompensate by being a bit overbearing. I know what you like in bed. I know cuz I fuckin taught you. I know that you like when I kiss your forehead and talk to you after sex. I know your favorite tattoo of mine is the WE ARE KINGS one just above my hip. You always give it extra kisses when you can.”

She nodded, welling up with tears.

“The way I know you and feel known by you….its different. treating it like any ordinary relationship just…” he took a deep breath. “Maybe I’m just a traditionalist deep down underneath all that other shit. but….i can’t think of a better way to honor our intimacy than marriage. Let’s get a dog together and never have to split custody. Will you marry me?”

Amelia burst into tears, and a fit of laughter. In between giggles, and wiping at her cheeks with her hands, she attempted to say “yes” but her laughter got worse every time that she tried.

“Sorry, sorry. One- second.” She took a deep breath. “Fuck I can’t believe we’re doing this. But…yeah. Yes! Yes I’ll marry you, Matty.”

***

Matty panted hotly as his body jerked and his hips bucked up, off the bed. He stroked himself inside his boxers, swiping at his sensitive tip, and whining against the pillow as he drew closer to the edges of bliss.

“Fuck, fuck, fu-oh…”

His mind played, on a loop, a distant memory of her hands all over her body, her silvery voice echoing through his mind, cooing sweetly.

“Oh, sweet angel, you’re doing so well.”

“You look so pretty like that. Did you know that? Did you know that you’re the most perfect person on this planet?”

“Good boy, Matty. Taking it so well.”

His toes curled, digging into the mattress, with a strangled moan, he let go, the rush of release overpowering him, ropes of cum spurting onto his lower abdomen, dripping from his body.

“Hi darlin,’ it’s me. Again. I know I’m probably fillin’ up your voicemail at this point, but - ermmm- I miss you, Amelia. I’m sorry. All that shit I said the other week- I didn’t mean it. Just…so, so sorry. I’m - come home, please. Come back to me. I- can’t live without you. and honestly? I shouldn’t have to. You’re my-“ the monotonous voice of the machine interrupted him to let him know that he’d reached maximum recording capacity and that his message was sent. His finger hovered over her name on the screen as he considered calling back, maybe leaving another message. But he’d run out of ways to apologize and to beg. He’d try again tomorrow. He set his phone down on to the bedside table and reached for the lamp, flicking it off, he laid his head down on his pillow in the pitch black room. Another sleepless night.

[inthe-dark-tonight]

And All the Stars Align

chapter two: mercurial high

din djarin x princess!reader series

summary: you spend your day showing the stoic mandalorian around, much to your dismay, while your mother is gone attending some business.

word count: 1.5k

series rating: E (18+ mdni)

warnings: no use of y/n, slow burn, slight enemies to lovers, some helmetless din, little bit of mutual pining, some banter, no physical descriptions of reader, no mentions of age gap so read however you’d like, not really that many warnings yet :)

notes: here’s chapter two!! :) this story is really slow (i love slow burn sorry) so i apologize but it will be worth it. as i said in the last chapter notes i was slightly inspired by padme and anakin’s relationship in episodes 2 & 3 so you may start to see some similarities to their story here and there. also any feed back, comments, & asks are appreciated, i will answer ALL of them i swear. okay that’s all xoxo

thank you again to my loves @shatteredbaby & @javiscigarette for beta reading this whole fic and helping me with ideas here and there <3 and i CANT forget my literal mother @pr0ximamidnight for listening to me ramble, share ideas and encouraging me to keep writing ilysm.

You’re quick to turn around after hearing your name. It’s him. The Mandalorian. He bows his head and you give him a once over before answering him.

“Hi.” Your voice comes out soft and quiet, slightly startled by his presence.

“I didn’t get the chance to formally introduce myself, I’m Din.” He holds out his gloved hand for you to shake.

As his hand wraps around yours, your eyes move from his lips, to the curve of his nose, back to his brown eyes. You can feel your cheeks starting to burn from just his gaze and the touch of his gloved hand.

“The Mandalorian….” You trail off nodding your head slowly.

“That’s me.” He says sarcastically as you pull your hand away from his.

“Well, thank you for being here,”  You glance down at the floor, averting his gaze. “And agreeing to fight in this duel or whatever.”

“Hm.” He grunts. “I should get back.” He nods towards the crowd. 

“Yeah.” Your heart flutters a bit as his eyes stay locked on yours. “You should.” 

He looks at you in silence for a few moments longer, then walks back into the crowd, disappearing before your eyes. 

That’s the last time you saw him that night before heading off to bed. The rest of the night was filled with senseless chatter that you barely picked up on as your eyes wandered around the room. Jem set him up in the room he’ll be staying in for the next week after the party, and of course it’s right next to yours. He’s all you can think about that night. 

You lay awake thinking about the way everyone stopped and stared when he walked into the room, including yourself. The deep timbre of his voice when he called out your name, and the way your chest fluttered when you turned around to find him standing in front of you. 

This could be bad.

The next morning you wake up later than usual, getting yourself together before heading to have a late breakfast. 

When you get to the dining area, the Mandalorian is sitting at the table with his helmet off. The second you walk in his head snaps up to look at you and he freezes, eyes wide and a slightly shocked look on his face. 

He clears his throat, “Good morning” his voice is deep and smooth. You find yourself frozen as well, staring back at his deep brown eyes. 

“Hi” you finally break eye contact. 

You slowly walk over to the table, pulling out your chair and quickly taking a seat. He clears his throat before speaking. 

“Your mother she-“ he pauses when you look up at him. “She already left, said her and Jem had some business to attend to.” 

You nod your head, taking in his features as you sit across the table from him. The two of you continue to sit in silence for a few minutes, exchanging shy glances now and then as you pile food onto your plate and start eating. A few moments later a guard comes in. 

“Princess” you whip your head in his direction, thankful that the tension in the room has been somewhat broken. “Your mother sent me. She would like you to show our guest around the palace. She won’t be back until dinner. She’ll meet with you then.” 

You’ve got to be kidding. 

You nod your head “Thank you.” The guard bows his head then leaves the room. 

You look back at Din to find a blank expression on his face. You give him a forced smile, hoping he can’t see through it. It’s going to be a long day. 

You stand up from your chair abruptly “Meet me back here at two so I can show you around.”

 You glance back at him one last time and he nods his head in your direction before you turn to walk towards the double doors that lead into the parlor. You want to get this over with as quickly as possible.

It’s ten of two when Din walks into the dining hall, you haven’t been waiting long but you’re ready to get this over with. He’s holding his helmet in his right arm when he walks through the doorway, he bows his head as he walks towards you. 

“Princess.” 

“Din,” he's less than a foot away from you now. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?” You let out a huff, not giving him time to answer. 

You quickly turn your back to him and walk through the doors into the parlor, towards the large floor to ceiling windows. Din is just catching up to you as you turn to face him.

 “So, this is one of many parlors” you gesture towards the large room with chairs and end tables sprawled throughout. “Probably one we use the most.” 

You continue to walk through the room, glancing towards the large windows as you walk. Then you walk through another set of large doors leading to a long hallway lined with windows. You can feel his presence trailing close behind you.

“This hallway leads back towards the grand hall, where we held the banquet last night” you state.

“I remember.” His voice comes out flat. 

You turn around and give him a look that says you’re already annoyed. His lip quirks up at your reaction. You just turn forward and continue walking. 

“On this side,” you gesture to the left “all these doors open into the grand hall.” You freeze and turn around to look at him, causing him to stop in his tracks. “But you already knew that.” You glance at him. And quickly spin back around.

“On the other side we have the main conference room” you continue walking down the corridor, it then curves to the left and there’s large windows that curve with the hallway and look out onto the city. 

“More doors to the grand hall.” You gesture as you walk past. 

You then come to the end of the hall and there’s an elevator.  “We’re going up now” he grunts in response. 

You get in the elevator and the whole thing is made of glass, it’s a long square tube that goes straight up. While you’re on the elevator you sneak a few peaks over at him, admiring his side profile. You pass a handful of floors going up. 

“These are mainly rooms for our guards, housekeepers, any staff that stays with us. Some floors have small conference rooms and landing pads for visitors ships, which I’m sure you’ve seen.” You glance at him and he just stays quiet.

 It’s silent the rest of the way. Once the elevator stops, you step out first and Din follows. You’re in a large outdoor space now, the ground is some sort of stone or cement. It’s almost like a courtyard, lined with lamp posts and shrubs here and there. 

“This space isn’t used very often” you state as you walk out. “Mainly for training purposes”   

“Training?” He lifts his brow.

“Yeah, for the guards. Now and then we’ll hold small gatherings here as well.” You walk to the ledge and sit, looking up to point to the next floor. “You’ll probably recognize that’s the floor our rooms are on.” 

Din sits next to you and looks up, following your hand.

You point to the left “That’s my room there.” You can see large opened doors leading out to the balcony, covered by sheer curtains that ruffle in the wind. Then you point to the right side, the room next to yours with a similar balcony. “That’s your room” You glance over at him. 

He nods. “I noticed this area when I stepped out on the balcony earlier, was wondering what it was for.” 

“Well, now you know.” your mouth quirks up into a timid smile. You take a quick glance around before speaking again. “Let's keep going.” 

You stand up to walk back towards the elevator, din getting up to follow. He walks behind you in silence.

After pressing the button for the elevator, you look up at the sky taking in the large white clouds scattered about. You can feel dons eyes on you and your cheeks start to burn up. 

 “There's just one more spot to show you.” Your eyes meet with his as the bell for the elevator goes off. 

After stepping into the elevator it passes the floor your rooms are on and there’s a long stretch without any floors. The view of the city is amazing from how high 

up you are now, you can see other skyscrapers clearly and transports zooming past in the distance. Finally the elevator stops on what looks like a circular platform with a railing, and there’s a large half dome over the elevator. When you step out, there’s a bit of a breeze from how high up you are. 

“Nobody really comes up here except for me” you point up at the dome covering the elevator as you walk towards the railing. “That’s all the electrical for the building and what not.” 

You lean on the railing looking down from the roof of the tall skyscraper, taking in the city from this angle. You look over at Din. 

“I’ve been coming up here for years whenever I need a little alone time, nobody has caught onto it yet.” You clear your throat. “So, don’t tell my secret” you give him a skeptical look and smile. 

“You have my word, princess.” He’s giving you a serious look, and you swear that his eyes flicker to your mouth for a moment. You start to squirm under his gaze. 

“Well,” You look back out over the railing. “We should get back” you turn to walk towards the elevator again. 

The ride back down is quieter than ever.

thank you for reading <3

tagging some moots: @ilovepedro @beskarandblasters @gracieheartspedro @daydreamingmiller @isitmeulookin4 @hearteyesforjoel @tieronecrush @demonjoel @eliza-8. @tizylish @orcasoul

[serenefreakgeekao3]

Fear of Falling

CHAPTER THREE [Masterlist]

Pairing: Hiccup x ftm!reader

Summary: Hiccup recounts everything he's been thinking throughout his meeting with You, then is finally able to take you flying for the first (proper) time!

Tags: carpenter!reader, awkward!Hiccup, mutual pining, Hiccup's POV, first time flying, lunch date

Warnings: slightly obsessive behaviour(?), vague descriptions of dragons fighting

Author’s Note: Hey all! So sorry for my long break on writing this series, but I did recently complete one of the longest multi-chaptered fic I've ever written so I'm rather proud of myself. Anyway, here's the long-awaited Chapter Three! The beginning tends to rehash a little bit of what already happened, so I just hope everyone enjoys regardless!

Words: 5715

HICCUP’S POV

You were an enigma, that was for sure. A Viking with no feel for violence, with no dragon- even homeless until Hiccup finally met you. Really, wouldn't everyone take notice? Wouldn't everyone become borderline obsessed with you?

Hiccup thought he knew everyone his age in Berk. He thought they all flocked together naturally, that his choices of companionship were narrowed down to the few he grew up with. For some reason, the migrating Vikings taking refuge in Berk never seemed to spark the thought- maybe one of them would be his age. Whenever he thought of those incoming Vikings he pictured the big, the burly and old. He never pictured young, timid, and extremely fucking hot.

It was probably unfair of Hiccup to keep you hidden away. It was just that Hiccup needed to relax at some point, needed a place to get away so that everyone wouldn't find him, pester him and ask for more things that he couldn't quite deliver. Being Chief was a lot harder than his father made it out to be. Though, granted, his father had enough practice at it by the time Hiccup was born and was able to notice. He now just wished he'd spent more of his time and attention learning than admiring.

But that day- the first day he met you in that carpenter's shed- had been a complete accident. Hiccup couldn't help but take notice once his fear of Astrid discovering him slacking off died down. The way you held yourself, the mysterious aura surrounding you, the silence that portrayed real thought into the words you’d said; it all captured him. Enraptured him.

Suddenly Hiccup found himself a lot more willing to participate in the town’s rebuilding, if only he could have the chance to glance over and see you. He found himself almost unconsciously walking toward the shed constantly- sometimes entering to find it empty, other times turning himself around before he made it so he could just prove to himself that he had a modicum of self-control.

The day Astrid noticed you, Hiccup knew that his time was running short. He had wanted to keep things the way they were. A secret, someone to keep hidden away from the others so you wouldn’t realize just how awfully average Hiccup was compared to the rest of his friends. He didn't want to give up this newfound companionship, especially before it ever had a chance to grow into anything. So once Hiccup discovered your homelessness, suddenly he had a plan! If Hiccup helps you build a house, you'd have plenty of time together, and no one could argue that he was hiding away from his job!

The month it took to build your house was not only one of the most fun times he could remember for a long while, but it was also the longest stretch of time that he’d gone without riding Toothless. Hiccup could tell that Toothless was becoming antsy, and even Hiccup, himself, was itching for the freedom of flight. However, Hiccup didn’t want to lose any more time with you than he absolutely needed to, which was why he waited. Until he finally met your dragon- until he could oh-so-casually bring up flying and mention you both should ride together. Hiccup even had a few places he wanted to show off- beautiful locations that he thought you might admire.

Then, he proceeded to find out that you didn’t have a dragon, either! After this long living in Berk, who wouldn’t jump at the chance to have their own companion like that? But you didn’t want to, had some sort of notion that the right dragon would just ‘find you’ somehow. Even Hiccup, himself, had to shoot Toothless out of the sky for them to meet and grow any closer! It baffled him, but Hiccup didn’t really find himself minding all that much. If you didn’t have a dragon and ever needed to go anywhere, then he would jump at the chance to help you.

He didn’t really question his infatuation with you, at first. Being borderline obsessed with you, wanting to be near you all of the time, of course it wasn’t romantic. He’d felt romantic feelings before- with Astrid, even though it didn’t work out between the two of them- and this felt nowhere near the same. It took a couple- okay, maybe a few- people suggesting he did feel that way for him to sit down and think on it. That… Maybe his relationship with Astrid didn’t work out because he hadn’t actually liked her romantically, he’d just been envious of her skills and admired her absolute strength and resolve. That maybe his feelings for you might actually be more than just…

That was always where his brain stalled, halting his train of thought. He couldn’t put his finger quite on how he felt. There was so much going on inside his head when he’d thought of you. Protection, though you didn’t need any. Wanting to provide for you, anything you’d want or need, though you were perfectly capable of getting anything for yourself. He wanted to make you laugh, hear your thoughts, learn more about you. He wanted to learn so much about you, his curiosity was endless. The more he learned, the more he still yearned to know.

He ended up getting so distracted, though, that he was no longer just ‘taking breaks’ from being Chief to hang out with you. He finally had to admit he was completely neglecting his duties. He still did a few things here and there every day, but it was nowhere near the amount he was supposed to be doing. Astrid had finally cornered him in his house before he could sneak out, locking the door by knocking over a bookshelf in front of it. It was a hard wake-up call, but one he sorely needed. Berk was still being hunted, after all.

He’d wanted to say bye to you, but he couldn’t think of a way to do it without sounding too attached. Of course, he’d see you again, the scouting shouldn’t take too long. Or so he had thought. Once he was out flying again, everything else seemed to fade away. He scoured the entire area nearby- until he’d found what he was looking for, unfortunately. A raiding party sailing a tad too close to New Berk, and he knew he needed to throw them off their track. It’d taken a week, but he managed to plant enough false evidence that they’d switched their track and began sailing toward a separate island, far off.

He watched for another two days just to make sure- which was when he’d run into the man running the entire business. Grimmel the Grisly, the man who was responsible for wiping out the entirety of the Night Furies (or so he’d heard, during his stealthy informational gathering missions). He was a smart man, immediately clinging to the fact that they’d been led astray. Hiccup had to get creative if he wanted to lead them further away anymore, and it took a lot longer than he’d hoped.

All the while, every night that he’d finally camped out, curled against Toothless, he’d thought of you. Wondered what you were doing, if you’d been working that day or if you took the breaks that Hiccup had been trying to force you to take regularly. He wondered if you’d kept up your whittling, if you had made anything else since he’d last seen you. Of course, he’d intersperse those thoughts with wonderings of his friends, or the village. But your face was always the last thing in his mind’s eye before he fell asleep.

By the time he felt comfortable enough to come back home, he realized he’d been gone for nearly a month’s time. That’s what he’d figured, anyway, when he added all the tick marks he’d made every time he camped. As New Berk began to come into view, Hiccup leaned to the side, pushing Toothless to fly closer to the forest instead of the ocean. He’d just wanted to see your house, reassure himself that it hadn’t burnt down, and taken you with it, while he was gone. Of course, it was still standing. Toothless cried out as he flew above the house, and Hiccup laughed out loud, shaking his head.

“Can’t hide anything from you, bud, can I?”

Touching down in the town close to sunset, he was immediately swarmed. They’d decided on a feast in the Great Hall to celebrate their Chief’s return, so he was ushered inside with the crowd. He kept glancing over toward the footpath he knew led to your cabin, but it was dark and soon he was surrounded by the warmth and light of the Great Hall. He was pushed further to the back as more and more people entered the building, making way for everyone to feast. Drinks began to pour as meat was thrown onto the fire, and suddenly everything else fell away as Hiccup was ensconced in his typical home life. With how much everyone was celebrating his return, he began to wonder if he’d worried them all.

Meeting eyes with you across the Great Hall had nearly stopped his heart in his chest. You were here! After all the times he had offered and begged for you to come down here and eat with him- and his friends, of course- for you to just turn him down? Now you were here! Did you know he had returned? Had word gotten back to you so quickly? He stumbled as he rushed to stand, to at least try to meet you halfway, but he knocked his tankard over and he heard Astrid gasp in shock. He turned, cursing under his breath as he tried his best to clean up his spill and apologize to his friend. He knew his friends could see his awkward stumbling and rambling, something he thought he had grown out of already. He felt embarrassed, but he’d feel any sort of way if it meant you were there with him.

Dinner was distracting, but the thought of you walking home alone was even more so. As he’d stared into that darkness, down the forest path that led to your home, he knew he wouldn’t be able to get any sort of rest without knowing you were home safe. He said as much, looking deep into your eyes. He really missed your eyes- in fact he hadn’t realized the colour was quite that shade, like his mind had slowly began to forget about it in the time he’d been away. He didn’t quite know how he felt about that… (Bad. He felt very bad about that.)

After walking you home and having an intense discussion, he hadn’t quite wanted to leave. However, you had agreed to go flying the next day, finally! He couldn’t wait for tomorrow, so he was eager to sleep and pass the time. He hadn’t even bothered to walk home, jumping on the back of Toothless as soon as your door had closed behind him. He didn’t know you were watching him fly off from your window, but just the same, you didn’t know he was holding that little figurine of his father in his hands during the flight. It was amazingly crafted, so detailed and correct in its design. He was enamoured.

Sleep took him rather quickly once he’d settled down, having had a long day. As he woke, bright and early in the morning, Astrid was already trying to knock his door down with her pounding. He rushed over and opened the door before she genuinely knocked the door in, and he saw Toothless peaking at him over her shoulder. She informed him, correctly so, that he needed to give an update to her and the other riders. He agreed, making his way down toward town. The meeting was held toward the centre of town, closer to the cliffs than the Great Hall, and in the presence of their tight-knit group of dragon riders, along with their dragons.

Just as the meeting was ending, and Hiccup was petting Toothless as congratulations for not getting into any trouble while they were busy, he heard your voice. He turned quickly at the sound of his name, smiling brightly. You were dressed differently than normal- tighter clothes, with long sleeves to cover your arms, your tight pants tucked into your boots. You had gotten dressed for the occasion, and Hiccup was not complaining.

“You ready then?” He asked, unable to keep the excitement from his voice. The rest of the riders had been wandering away already, in groups or alone to their own destination, but Astrid stood nearby as she brushed Stormfly. He could tell she was eavesdropping, even if she did a good job of pretending she wasn’t. He could see the hesitancy in your eyes, dropping his hands from Toothless’ back and wandering closer to you.

“Uh,” You began, clearing your throat, “Yeah. Sure.”

“Hey,” Hiccup begins quietly, reaching forward to take your hand in his. “It’ll be okay, I promise. We’ll be there every step of the way.” You were staring deep into his eyes before suddenly bursting out laughing. Hiccup draws back slightly, confused.

“Yeah,” You raise a hand, wiping your face. “I sure hope you’ll both be there every step of the way. You’re sort of my ride.” Hiccup chuckles too, embarrassed, and pulls his hand away. Of course, he fails at comforting you, saying the wrong thing-

You reached quickly to take his hand once again, taking a small step forward into his personal space. He breathes in a quiet gasp at the proximity as you begin to whisper. “No, but, thank you Hiccup. Your confidence is reassuring.” As you step back bashfully, taking your hand back to rub the back of your head, Hiccup lets out his breath slowly. He can feel his cheeks are hot- was he really blushing?

“Y-Yeah,” Hiccup tries, stuttering slightly before clearing his throat. “Of course.” He turns to look around awkwardly, unsure what to do. Then he meets Toothless’ eyes, who bobs his head up and down in encouragement. Taking a deep breath, he finally turns back to you with a large smile, holding his hand out. “Ready?”

You eye his hand for a moment, and he wonders what you’re thinking. Then you reach out, grasping his hand firmly with a resolute nod. Hiccup swallows, feeling butterflies fill his stomach as he begins to gently pull you by the hand, leading you closer to Toothless. He brings you to the front, looking at his giant doe eyes and smiling at him. “Hey bud,” Hiccup starts, pulling you closer. “You know him already, don’t you?” He brings their joined hands closer, and you both watch as Toothless sniffs them, then lowers his head. “Okay, flat palm, like this,” Hiccup whispers, unfolding your hand before gently pulling you forward again, placing your palm on his snout.

Hiccup watched as your pinched, nervous face slowly eased up. You were relaxing, and soon enough he let go of you to let you handle it on your own. You began to slowly pet Toothless, and Hiccup could tell his dragon was enjoying the attention. Tiny purrs emanated from him, his tail wagging slowly and his spines shimmying on the top. You moved closer, pulling your other hand up to scratch at his chin how Hiccup usually does, and he couldn’t hold back his smile. Hiccup watched, entranced, as you took to Toothless quicker than he’d ever seen. Maybe Hiccup’s own personal connection to you helped- though, he did quite remember Toothless being not so fond of Astrid back then when Hiccup thought he liked her.

Once you chuckled and finally backed away, there was a light in your eyes that Hiccup couldn’t place, but adored. He hoped he could find you your own dragon soon if only to see this light in your eyes more often. Nodding, he takes your hand quickly, excitedly, and leads you around to the side. He lifts his prosthetic leg, hooking it into its holder before swinging himself easily up and over onto the saddle. He leans over completely, holding a hand out to help you up. You look hesitant once again but take his hand easily. You’re unsure of your footing at first, but you inevitably make your way up onto the saddle, sitting close behind Hiccup.

Toothless looks back, sharing a look with Hiccup, and he can’t help but huff out a whisper, “Okay, gentle now, bud.”

That must’ve been the first time that Toothless actually listened.

Toothless began a gentle jaunt off toward the edge of the cliff, widening his wingspan out and letting himself just jog right off the edge of the cliff. Hiccup heard your gasp, felt your arms tightening around his torso- felt his own cheeks heat up again- but you didn’t seem scared, or panicked. Your grip slowly loosened during the glide, and eventually, he heard a soft little, “Oh,” Emanate from you that tightened his chest. You were enjoying it! You were enjoying flying, just like he thought you would, and now he was finally able to share the thing he was most passionate about with you!

The wind blew through his hair, and the feeling of flying was incredible. He felt free, even while your arms were wrapped around him. Even more so, knowing it was you. It was as if he could feel his heart growing more and more. He couldn’t get enough of this, of you. The sun was still rising over the horizon once they flew far enough over the expanse of the ocean, and he could hear your quiet amazement at the sight. Hiccup let go of the saddle in front of him, spreading his arms out wide.

The flight lasted a long time, mostly silent with bits and pieces of conversation thrown in. Mostly things like, “You do this all the time?” Or “I never realized how freeing this would feel!” Hiccup wanted to throw his arms up and dance around in victory, but with sitting on Toothless- and still wanting to look cool in front of you- he managed to restrain himself. Just barely. However, it was getting close to noon when he decided they should land somewhere nearby for lunch. They’d definitely flown out farther than Hiccup had meant to, realizing this just as the Fogfall came into view.

“What’s that?” He heard your question and drew in a tense breath, leaning back into you to speak clearer.

“We’ve taken to calling it the Fogfall.” The view was immaculate, in all honesty. At the top, of it all is a tall island- similar to New Berk in a way- but halfway down the mountain was an abnormally large cave opening, spewing a thick, roiling fog that fell all the way down toward the ocean. A large portion of the water is obscured, with just the hints of a large craggy bottom on the outskirts of the fog. “We try to stay away from it. No one that’s gone inside has ever come out.”

“Oh,” You mumble, but looking back Hiccup could tell how entranced you were by the sight. Directing Toothless, who seemed wary of the place himself but acquiesced, the group of you began to make your way down to a small and short island off to the side of Fogfall. The island- if you could even call it that- was mainly just a rock formation jutting out of the ocean, but it had a nice plush spot of grass on top, large enough for your group to make themselves at home comfortably. And it gave a great view of Fogfall, one that you seemed to immediately be interested in after you were helped off of Toothless’ back.

Hiccup busied himself while your back was turned, reaching into the saddlebag on Toothless’ side, tossing him a fish that he catches mid-air before pulling out the rest. The lunch that he had prepared for them- he wasn’t much of a cook himself, but he had hoped that you’d be out long enough to have a picnic. It was one of the things he most looked forward to if he was honest. It almost felt like a date- but he knew it wasn’t! He totally knew it wasn’t a date, as much as he wanted it to be. But he could at least pretend, in his own head, for a little bit.

You turned around just as Hiccup laid the last of the food out on a blanket he had spread on the ground. He heard your surprised gasp, and he felt himself preen under your gaze. “I just thought you might be hungry, after flying for so long?” He smiled, plopping down unsteadily onto one side of the blanket. He reaches over, grabs a leg of meat and waves it toward you in a come hither motion. “Well? What are you waiting for?”

“That looks delectable,” You whisper, and while the Fogfall was nearby it provided no noise so Hiccup was able to hear you easily. He could hear Toothless behind him, probably bending himself backwards trying to sniff at his saddlebag for more fish. Just as you made your way to sit down on the other side of the blanket, Toothless huffed and moved to plop down next to Hiccup. He laughed, pushing his dragon’s head playfully.

“Okay, you big brute. I might’ve brought a snack for you, but if you’re still hungry you can go hunt down below. There’s plenty of fish in the sea.” Toothless lifted a gaze and met his eyes, then ‘subtly’ flicked his gaze toward Y/N and back, as if asking Hiccup if he’ll be alright. Hiccup could feel his blush forming, hoping you hadn’t noticed the exchange. He just pushes against Toothless’ head again, awkwardly laughing. “Well, go on then, if you must.”

Toothless stood, giving himself a full body shake before taking a running leap off of the edge of the cliff. Hiccup grinned, looking over toward you from the corner of his eye. You were already digging in, pulling a bread roll apart to stuff with meat. He bit his lip, unsure of what to say or do. What do people usually do on dates? On non-dates, he reminded himself. Shaking his head, he sits up straighter and waves his drumstick about.

“Did I ever tell you the story of how Toothless and I met?”

Lunch has passed rather uneventfully, though absolutely pleasantly. Hiccup told stories of his past- of Old Berk, and his father, and how everyone always did the right thing in the end- and he had your rapt attention the entire time. You asked appropriate questions, in his opinion, and gasped at the right parts that made him feel like the best storyteller of all the Vikings. He felt like he could talk with you forever, but with your food as nothing but crumbs left between you, he didn’t know how else to prolong your time together. You didn’t exactly seem in any hurry to get going either, staring into Hiccup’s eyes with a look he couldn’t decipher, but wished he could.

You suddenly looked away, almost bashfully if he had to put an adjective to it, and Hiccup tilted his head in response. Your fingers began toying with your shirt, stretching and contracting in a way that Hiccup wondered if you were wishing for your whittling tools. He supposed you hadn’t expected to need them while out flying. You began to idly play with one of the straps along your legs, undoing the buckle and retightening it. The silence had been comfortable around the two of you for a few minutes, so the next words absolutely surprised Hiccup to no end.

“So what about you and Astrid?”

Hiccup had to blink a few times, letting that question sink in. You seemed to curl more and more into yourself the longer he was silent, so he jumped to answer without fully thinking it through. “What? What about me and Astrid? You mean why she’s my second in command?” Your shoulders slumped, and a pouting look crossed your face that absolutely didn’t send Hiccup’s heart fluttering in his chest (He’s decided to keep lying to himself about that).

“No,” You almost stuttered on the word, pulling the strap too tight before loosening it once again, buckling it and moving to the one on your other leg. No matter how far Hiccup ducked his head, he still couldn’t manage to meet your eyes. “Like,” You huffed, and Hiccup began to wonder if saying this was hard for you. He wondered why. “Everyone at the village, when I first arrived, was betting on when ‘Chief Hiccup’ would propose to Astrid. Then one day, it all suddenly stopped. It was jarring, honestly. It was all anyone ever talked about, then abruptly it was something everyone avoided.”

Hiccup blinked a few times. Then a few times more. His brain wasn’t processing what you were saying, what you were insinuating. Then, it hit him like a dragon to the face. He pulled in a deep breath, widening his eyes unconsciously. You thought he was still dating Astrid?

“No,” Hiccup practically shouted, then cleared his throat, and he could feel a massive blush lighting his face. Now he was glad you weren’t looking directly at him, it would only make his embarrassment worse. “No, we- uh,” He rubs the back of his head, furrowing his brows. “How do I say this…” You finished buckling the second strap, but your fingers idled on the leather without any real intention. You weren’t looking at him, but it was clear you were listening. “We were together, for a while. And, well, yeah- everyone kept trying to push us to get married quickly.

“I assume they wanted me to settle down, to stop flying out away from the town so much, and figured that’d do it? Or maybe they were just hoping for my happiness?” Hiccup huffs, shaking his head, “No, that’s not the point. We were together, and with everyone pushing and pushing for me to ask for her hand, even Astrid herself, it really got me thinking. I was complacent. I was with her because I had admired and envied her strength and resolve; she’s really a wonderful woman. But I didn’t-” He huffs, lowering his gaze to the grass, letting his fingers begin plucking them from the earth. “I don’t like her romantically. It took me a long time to realize that, as I hadn’t really felt romantic attraction before, at that point.”

You finally lifted your eyes, looking up at him through a hooded gaze. You bit your lip and Hiccup felt himself still entirely, tensing himself to be sure he didn’t jump forward to place those lips on his own. He really, definitely, never felt this way before. “At that point?” You repeated his last bit as a question, tilting your head to the side just slightly. Hiccup was breathless for a moment, unable to answer. Was this it? It certainly looked like this was it, that you might share what he was feeling. And why not ask? Why not just go ahead, go for it? Hiccup was nothing if not brave, he’s come to learn. Or, tries to be anyway.

He opens his mouth, unsure what was about to come out but ready for it anyway, when he’s suddenly tackled to the ground. A large dragon tongue licks up his body and he groans, pushing Toothless off of him. “Gah, bud! You know dragon spit doesn’t come out!” He sits up, moving to stand, and begins to flick his arms to the side to get rid of the globules. “And it smells like fish, really bud?” He huffs, shaking his head. He’d practically forgotten you were there until you sidled up right next to him, holding the picnic blanket the two of you had just been sitting on up toward him.

“May I?” Your voice is quiet, but it stilled Hiccup anyway. He nods, unsure what he’s agreeing to. You bring the blanket closer and press it against Hiccup’s chest and- oh, you were just offering to help clean his suit. His face heats, a blush deepening on his cheeks the more you rub that cloth against him, and eventually he places a hand on your own, stopping your movements. He watches your throat flex as you swallow hard from the contact.

“I think I can get the rest from here, thank you,” Hiccup whispers, his voice rough as he stares into your eyes. A brilliant shade of pink lights up your own cheeks, and Hiccup wishes he had his artbook with him so he could draw this moment. He wishes he could find the right leaves or rocks, anything to create the right pigment, the right shade of pink that would match. He takes his time cleaning himself up, then begins to finally make his way over to Toothless. The dragon was giving him a look that he hoped you wouldn’t be able to decipher. Toothless was finally realizing what he’d just interrupted and looked both bashful and gleeful at the opportunity to tease Hiccup about it later. “Not a word, bud,” Hiccup whispers as he passes, stuffing the blanket into Toothless’ soggy saddlebag.

As he spun around, ready to clap his hands, he stopped before making a noise. You had your back turned once more, staring up toward the Fogfall. Seeing the thick moisture gave Hiccup an uneasy feeling he couldn’t quite place, even through his knowledge of its danger. He approaches you slowly, placing a hand on your shoulder. You still jump, but relax once meeting his eyes, turning to look back at the view.

“I don’t know why,” You begin, biting your lip before continuing, “But I seem drawn to it. It’s beautiful.” Hiccup shifted uneasily on his feet, shooting it one last glance before turning to face you directly.

“We should get going. It’s a long way back.” You nodded slowly, then sighed and turned to face Hiccup with a sweet smile.

“I’m ready.”

It was much the same as before, with Hiccup hopping on first and hoisting you up behind him. He felt the pressure of you wrapping your arms around his chest and hoped you wouldn’t feel the fluttering of his heart underneath your hands. He commanded Toothless to take flight, who ran toward the edge and glided off gently, still keeping his flight speed lowered as an act of kindness for you. Toothless began a wide arc, flying higher into the air without jarring you, and Hiccup couldn’t help but look back down toward Fogfall one last time.

Looking at that powerful fog, Hiccup flashes back to being a kid, the first time that he’d really met Toothless. That first ride with Astrid, when Toothless was summoned back to the alpha’s cave, flying through that thick fog that he could only see the nearest dragons to him, rather than the entire horde that had surrounded him. It was terrifying, in all honesty, the idea that while inside a fog so thick, you wouldn’t be able to see anything coming. Toothless slowly flew overhead, everyone looking down to admire the beautiful but deadly view. That must’ve been why no one had noticed his approach.

It was happening before anyone knew it- a large dragon, bigger than Toothless and crimson red in colour- had flown strikingly fast down toward them from their blind spot. As Toothless and Hiccup tried to regain their balance, Hiccup realized something rather quickly- they were trying to knock Hiccup off of his back! He took a firmer hold, glaring up toward this hostile newcomer. He heard your terrifying yelp, reaching back to steady you before slinking low toward the saddle. Then, he saw who was riding the red dragon.

“Didn’t realize any Nightfuries survived!” The antagonistic man called down, standing on the large dragon with a cruel smile on his face, hanging at an angle with a staff in hand curved around his dragon’s horn. Grimmel the Grisly. “Time to fix that.”

The dragon, while large, was still quite nimble. Toothless was faster, but with the added weight of an additional body other than Hiccup, he couldn’t fight or dodge to his fullest potential. Your face was buried into Hiccup’s back, arms tight around Hiccup’s torso as Toothless dodged around, the gleaming claws of the red dragon aiming directly for Hiccup every time. Toothless’ screech fills the air as he readies a bolt toward them, but just as he manages to aim and release, the dragon flies downward, then back up toward them with added speed.

They manage to knock into Toothless, the claws reaching out and coming close to Hiccup but just missing. However, that’s when Hiccup feels something that stops his heart. He felt lighter, colder- your grip had disappeared. Hiccup looked frantically around, spotting you at last. You were falling. Falling. The thing he’d promised you wouldn’t do- the thing he said he’d absolutely always protect you from! Ignoring Grimmel, he immediately directed Toothless downward. Faster, and faster, but you were falling too quick and he wouldn’t make it- Toothless wasn’t quick enough! Your arms were outstretched toward Hiccup, and he wanted more than anything to grab them and hoist you back up but you were too far away.

“Y/N!” Hiccup screamed, just as you were swallowed by the whiteness of the fog. Toothless pulled up short, stopping just above the fog. “No! No, go get him!” Hiccup tries to urge Toothless forward, but the dragon refuses to obey, scanning the whiteness around them with searching eyes. Hiccup growls out, they’re wasting time! He unhooks his prosthetic from the stirrup, swinging over and making to jump off of his back. He didn’t expect Toothless to catch him immediately, yelping out in fear. “No! Let go!” Hiccup kicked his legs around, pounding at Toothless’ arms. “Let me go! Let me save him!”

You were swallowed by the fog, descending into the abyss that no one had ever escaped from. And Hiccup was powerless to save you…

TAG LIST: *lecoindetobi , *gored-to-be-here , @am3nic , @ohdeersthings

[freshbakedbreadstick]

No. 1 Party Anthem - Mikey Berzatto x F!Reader - Chapter Five

Past!Mikey Berzatto x F!Reader

Carmy Berzatto x F!Platonic!Reader

Richie Jerimovich x F!Platonic!Reader

Summary: The past seems to repeat itself and this awful memory seems to provide some much needed context to your actions.

Warnings:  All my fics are 18+ regardless of the content. Heavy spoilers. Mentions of death, funerals, toxic relationships, grief, angst, strained relationships, minor injuries, arguments/yelling matches, details of anxiety/panic attacks, bad coping mechanisms, mental health issues, running away, addiction, interventions. This is literally just pure angst again im so sorry (not really (: ).

Word Count: 5k (sorry, she is a long one!)

A/N: I wrote this while procrastinating packing to move into my dorm LOLLL i move in a few days but im too anxious to even start packing <3 anyways this one is another heavy one and a long one too, so fun ! I hope you all enjoy because she was surprisngly difficult to write and edit bc my imposter syndrome and chronic perfectionism is out to get me ! ! Have a slay n gay day ily all ! 

Taglist: @marysucks-blog @shinebright2000 @jadeittic

MASTERLIST

It was a cold and cloudy day in March, fitting for a funeral. There was snow on each corner of the sidewalk, partially melted, but the cold air that made your lips burn when you stepped outside threatened more snowfall to come.

Today marked two weeks since you got the phone call that changed your entire life.

It was only two weeks after Mikey was found dead on the State Street Bridge and they already got him ready to be put into the ground. 

You stared out the window, silent, and watched the life that occurred outside. A man helped his son get out of their car, both in matching hats and scarves, a teen with a backpack passed by with their friends, laughing and jumping, a tree swayed, leaves still gone. 

“Hey, sweetheart, are you ready?”

You didn’t respond.

Your father placed his hand onto your shoulder, “Are you ready?”  

You sighed, letting your breath fog up the cold window pane in front of you. 

Most days, you sat on the only wooden dining chair that was saved from your and Mikey's apartment and looked outside the window. You noticed things you normally took for granted, like the view of snowfall during sunset and the way the trees swayed when a gust of wind blew. 

Finally, you stood up, feeling your dad's hand slip off your shoulder. You didn't bother to smooth out your black dress, letting the wrinkles set in the fabric. Meanwhile, the stockings you wore under pinched you as you moved, but you didn’t care enough to adjust them either. 

"Yea…” you responded at last, voice thick and scratchy.

Your parents mumbled quietly to each other as they locked the door, stealing not so subtle glances over to you as you stood in the middle of the path down the front door, looking at the now empty street. 

Everyone around you just seemed to keep on asking you the same question: "Are you ready to…" but you didn't know. You didn't know if you were ready to face death. But you did know that you felt no panic, sadness, guilt, fear, anger, happiness, or… anything really. 

‘I guess it’s better to feel nothing than something,’ you thought to yourself.

“Let’s get in the car now, okay?” 

You looked over to your mom, who approached you and gently grabbed your forearm, starting to lead you to your parents’ car. But you dug your heels into the ground making your mom jump as she suddenly jerked back. 

“I want… I want to drive myself.”

Your mother looked at you, eyes pleading. She then glanced at your dad, who softened and sighed. 

“Sweetie, i don’t think that is a good idea-”

“Please… i just… I need some time alone before I go in…”

Your parents shared a glance before your mom slowly loosened her grip on your arm. You slowly began to walk away from her, pulling your arm out of her grip. 

“We’ll follow you,” your dad said, voice steady but still anxious. 

You nodded and headed towards your car. The thought of being alone terrified you in general since the news of Mikey broke, but having a small moment alone in the car sounded heavenly after not being left physically alone, at all, for the past two weeks. You didn’t sleep alone, eat alone, or even shower alone; someone was always there either right next to you or right outside the door. While it was nice to have people around you during this time, you started feeling suffocated and pitied rather than supported. 

The drive was silent. You didn’t bother to turn on the radio or take off your thick coat or even play any of the cds Mikey had burned for you as teenagers like you normally did. Nothing was normal anymore anyways, so why bother?

But regardless, the silence was, in some way, comforting. It granted you the smallest bit of breathing space you knew you needed before you would face death itself.

After parking outside the funeral home, you sat in your seat. The car was off and it was silent as you sat there, not feeling particularly anything, just sort of numb. And for the first time in a while, you felt like you would be okay. It didn’t hurt anymore, just felt numb, and that seemed like progress to you. 

A knock outside your window made you jump and turn around. You expected to see your mom or your dad waiting for you, but was surprised to see Richie instead.

You cleared your throat and rolled your shoulder back, holding your head up high like you normally did, before you got out.

As you started to step out, you smiled at him, “Well don’t you look fine as a peach.”

Richie smiled softly for a brief second before it fell back down into a frown that made the wrinkles around his mouth deepen. He looked unwell, with heavy bags and a gaunt face, making him appear sick. 

While you analyzed him, he did the same for you. He scanned your face and body, seeing the way you continued to be the person he knew you as, even during a time in which nothing made sense anymore for anyone. Your shoulders were square and your head was high, making you look less like a grieving girlfriend and more like a CEO. This made him shiver. 

But regardless, he held his hand out for you to take, helping you up and out of your car. As you locked your car, he began to talk.

“Drove here alone?” he said, voice gravelly. 

“Yea… I needed to be alone.”

He nodded silently. He then took your hand, still in his own, and wrapped it around his arm. He led you to the sidewalk, toward the funeral home, steps slow and purposeful. 

“Everyone is here but you… you don’t have to talk to anyone, okay? If anyone bothers you, come to me.”

You chuckled dryly, “Thanks, but don't worry about me. I know this is hard for you too.”

Before he could retaliate to your words, you cleared your throat and walked a little faster. 

You watched as your parents, who were up ahead of you, greeted Natalie and Pete. You saw the way they moved inside after speaking to her, as if stuck in mud, around the sister of the man you loved. 

They both briefly turned back to look at you, eyes watering and drooping, before anxiously disappearing into the awaiting crowd of family members.

You paused, making Richie also pause beside you, turning to look at you. He saw the way your eyes scanned up the bricks of the building and then back down to the wilted ferns in pots next to the front doors. Your eyes, for a brief second, filled with tears, making him open his mouth before shutting it upon seeing you blink them away. 

You cleared your throat and began to move again, seemingly fine, until your heels began dragging on the pavement. So Richie silently moved his arm up to support you and looked away, staring off to the side. He didn't want you to see the way his eyes had started to tear up as he saw through your facade.

Natalie had focused her gaze on you just after your parents left, face in a permanent concerned frown that made her look more like a mother than anything else, before nodding softly to you, “Hi sweetie… are you ready?”

Were you ready?

“I just…” you began, mouth drying up the second you began to talk.

Natalie nodded at you anxiously, reaching over to take your hand in her own. The calluses she had from years of cleaning up after everyone rubbed soothingly into your own hand.

You shrugged, “...I just feel numb.”

Beside her, Pete winced. Natalie shot him a small glare before softening up as she turned back to you, “It’s okay, you're free to stay out here if you need some space, okay? Whatever it is that you need, let us know and we can help…”

Wordlessly, you rubbed your thumb into her hand and turned to look inside the hallway. A couple family members had already spotted you, their once staring gazes averting themselves from your frame as they noticed you caught them watching. Hushed voices that whispered to one another died down to either silence or near silent whispers as they stole glances at you and Richie walking inside.

You turned and gave Natalie a small smile, "Don't worry about me, are you doing ok-"

"Oh, there you are!!!!" A voice interrupted you, exclaiming loudly. 

You reeled around to the noise and made eye contact with Donna, who was pushing through the crowd and rushing forward to you. Fast.

Your eyes widened. 

Too fast. 

Her body was a blur as she approached you. 

Like a bullet.

In an instant, that moment of breathing space you had in the car disappeared and all that numbness flew out the window, being replaced by intense panic. 

The room started to spin, making your eyes widen as she stood in front of you, speaking what seemed to be gibberish. 

"Shit," Richie mumbled, but his voice was invisible to you. 

All you saw was Donna, hair wild and clothes wrinkled. Her hands moved wildly as she talked, voice so loud in your ears that it felt like your eardrums would pop.

"Mom!" Natalie yelped beside you, finally taking you out of the trance you were in by pushing her body in between you and Donna. 

Donna gasped, speaking hushed but angrily at Natalie, "Natalie, what are you doing? Don't you see I'm trying to talk to her- What do you mean I'm overwhelming her?! She's fine, if she had a problem, she would tell me, isn't that right?"

You saw her peek over Natalie's shoulder, eyes searing a hole into your face, "Right?" 

Your throat tightened. 

"Donna, how about we go ahead and sit so the services can start, okay?" Your mother had rushed over and behind Donna, putting her hands on the erratic woman’s shoulders before steering her away from you. 

Your mom cast you a concerned glance as she redirected Donna away from you, letting her blabber on and on to her about the decor being different and the beautiful flowers they got set up for the service. 

But all you did was stare back, breaths staggered and eyes focusing back only to see all eyes on you. 

Natalie let out a shuddered wheeze, taking the initiative to redirect everyone watching into the room where the services would be taking place. Slowly, their eyes turned away. 

"You ok?" Richie's voice seemed to finally register in your brain. 

You whipped your head to him, "Uhm yea… are you?"

In front of him, he saw the way you rearranged your body language back to its "normal state". Your shoulders rolled back again and your head was held high. But this time, your face was blank and did nothing to show emotion. 

Richie nods, "Let’s just, uh, wait until everyone goes in, ok?"  

You took a shallow breath and blinked your eyes, adjusting to the dim, warm lighting of the building. The entire place felt warm from the artificial fireplace on the left wall, facade made of rich brown oak. The furniture matched in wood, feeling dated but comforting, like a grandmother's house. It made the panic in your body slowly melt away, being replaced by the numb feeling again.

You looked at the yellowish-orange patterned wallpaper and brown wood trimming on the walls and snickered to yourself, catching Richie's attention.

"This place looks like a small, hole in the wall restaurant that's maintained by a family. Mikey loves this kind of family style decor…" 

Richie squeezed his eyes shut, "Yea… he does." 

You watched as everyone filed into the next room, recognizing familiar faces like Fak, cousin Michelle, and Uncle Jimmy. You continued to scan the crowd, not seeing the way Natalie nodded towards Richie, signaling him to take you inside with everyone. 

You let yourself be guided behind the crowd, watching everyone who knew Mikey sit down in the chairs that were set up. Donna was sitting in the front next to your parents, still talking. Beside her were empty seats. There was one, two, three, four, and five; one for you, Richie, Natalie, Pete, and Carmy.

Carmy.

You paused.

"Where's Carmy?" 

Richie stopped moving and grimaced. 

Next to you, Natalie linked your free arm into her own, "He uh… he might come by later." 

"Did he ever respond to any of you? I sent him a photo of the service paper but he never responded to me." 

"Uh…" Richie was seemingly at a loss for words. 

Natalie sighed and looked at Richie before responding, "He didn't to me either. Didn't pick up any of my calls."

The panic started up again, slowly swirling deep in your belly, making you suddenly start to speak at the speed of light, "What? Why? Who wouldn't come to their brother's funeral?"

Natalie gulped, voice shaking as she tried redirecting you, "Hey sweetie, how about we go inside and then wait and see if he comes-" 

"I mean, everyone tried to get in contact with him so it's not like none of us didn't try." 

"Yea, your right, but maybe he is running late and was busy-" 

"If he was running late he would've let us know, i know he would." 

The panic made your breathing pick up, making you lightheaded as you took in gulps of stuffy, warm air. It was perfumed like flowers and mothballs, making you cough lightly. 

Michelle, who was seated towards the entrance of the room, turned to you, as did a couple others, as your voice started to increase in volume. It was unbeknownst to you that you began to speak louder and louder, loud enough that people around you could overhear. 

Richie said your name, stern but still worried, "Hey, take a breath and lower your volume."

"What do you mean? I'm fine?" 

Natalie just shook her head, "This was a mistake, we shouldn't have forced her to come."

You jerked your head to her, "Natalie, it’s fine. Besides, I wanted to come." 

Her shoulders sagged, "If this is too much for you, you are free to go-" 

"Please, I'm fine!" You responded, speech getting faster and faster, "You don't have to worry about me like you're my mom." 

"I know I know, but I worry about you regardless, you're my best friend!" 

"Natalie, I'm okay I swear-" 

Richie whisper-yelled at you two, "Let's take this back out, neither of you are okay right now."

"Richie I swear I'm fine, I just want to see my dead boyfriend in his casket!" You whisper-yelled back as you stomped a foot down.

At this point, others had begun turning to look at you. Natalie flushed, noticing the stares while Richie groaned softly, taking your arm and dragging you away from the entrance and to the front door. 

"Your obviously not okay, just stand here and take some fucking breaths." Richie whispered, voice stern. 

You blinked, letting yourself get pulled like a ragdoll. You stumbled as you leaned into the doorway, feeling shame set in your body. 

That was a new feeling. 

"I'm… i'm…" you began, blinking wildly as your face flushed and your chest tightened. 

"Listen, I know this is hard but don't force yourself to do this for any one of us, okay? You can sit out here and none of us will blame you or be upset. We all have our own ways of grieving and if staying away is yours, then do it. You don't need our acceptance in order to grieve in your own way." 

The tangent Richie went on felt so out of character for him that it made you go silent as you watched him enunciate every word. Natalie trailed behind him, holding onto her body with wide eyes as she too listened to his speech, both moved and confused.

With a choked breath, you responded, "Okay, I'm sorry."

Richie's tensed shoulders and furrowed brows softened. He saw the way you looked down and away from him, body drooping. For a split second, he saw through the demeanor you had been putting on since you got out of the car and saw who you really were: the grieving love of Mikey's life, terrified of what life was going to be like moving forward without him. 

Natalie reached over and rubbed your arm, before turning to Richie, "It's starting, you can go in if you would like…" 

Richie nodded grimly, looking at the floor for a brief second before reaching forward, taking your cheeks into his hand and giving your hairline a small peck. 

"You're not alone with this… we are here." 

You looked at him, a cross of confusion and relief written all over your face, making him hold back a laugh when he noticed it. Upon hearing his laugh mixed with a cough, you chuckled softly to yourself. Natalie was the only one not laughing, but still had a small smile on her face as she watched you two. 

“God this is so weird, are you a wise old man now or something?” You joked, gently pushing Richie’s shoulder.

Richie snorted and looked away, rubbing the back of his neck, “Ah it’s nothing, just something i learned… don’t think it’s gonna be this way all the time!”

The three of you smiled at one another, right up until Fak interrupted the sweet moment. 

“Hey guys… uh, the service is starting…”

Richie rocked his jaw, the smile he had disappearing from his face. He turned to Fak, annoyed already by him interrupting, “Listen man-”

Natalie loudly cleared her throat, narrowing her eyes at Richie for a second as a warning, making him trip up on his words. 

Richie coughed again and looked away, mumbling to himself about how annoying Fak was. Natalie just rolled her eyes and turned to Fak, smiling sweetly at him.

“Thank you, we’ll join you in a sec.” 

You watched them all interact with one another, some of the closest people in Mikey’s life that ended up becoming some of the closest people in your own life, but in this moment they felt so far away, emotionally and physically. The random moment of peace between you, Natalie, and Richie was fleeting and reality brought you back down to the present moment, reminding you where you were and why you were here. 

Just seconds ago it felt like a regular everyday moment where the three of you talked, waiting for Mikey to turn around the corner or come in from another room and join you, smirking like he always did. He would wrap his muscular arm around you, pulling you into his side and start to joke around with Richie. He would tap Natalie on her shoulder, acknowledging her, and bring Fak over with a laugh, joining all of you together with ease. Any annoyance and discomfort would just disappear around Mikey; he just knew what to say and what to do to bring everyone, even those with differences, together. 

But that would never happen again. 

Mikey was dead and that would never happen again. 

He would never hold you, pressing his body warmth against you, he would never kiss you, gently guiding your face with his large hand, and he would never love you, ever again. 

Your body seemed to finally catch up with the cocktail of emotions you have been feeling for the past weeks and settled on one to focus on: panic. 

It crawled up your throat, squeezing it in a way that made you feel as if any second now, you would be on the floor, clawing at the rug as you struggled to breathe. But you knew that as long as you didn’t let it overwhelm you, convince it that everything was ok, you would be fine. 

So you were going to do anything you needed to do to not let it overwhelm you again.

“Uh, you two head in, okay? I need a second alone.” you said, making them turn to you. 

With a clearing of your throat, you perked up, smiling, as if nothing that had just occurred even happened. Natalie looked at you, taken somewhat aback and concerned, but didn’t push further. Richie was the same, confused but didn’t want to say or do anything that would make you break down. 

“You sure you don’t want any of us here, we are more than happy to-” Natalie began, but you interrupted her by gently moving a strand of hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear.

“I’m okay, I'll join you in a second. Thank you both for being here with me.” you then brought them both into a gentle embrace, speaking clearly. 

Natalie and Richie exchanged a worried glance behind your back, both struggling to put on a smile to face you when they pulled back. 

Richie began to move to the room where the service had started, “Let us know if you need anything. Text us or call us or just say our name and we will be there.” 

You nodded and shooed them playfully off, leaving yourself standing against the doorway. The doors of the room where service had started closed behind them with a dull thud, leaving you truly alone in the entryway of the funeral home.

Your shoulders and smile dropped, eyes glazing over as you did so. With your heart continuing to race in your chest, you had no choice but to start pacing back and forth. The panic was starting to become too much to control so you tried your hardest to count your breathing, desperate to get it back into control. 

“Fuck…” you whimpered to yourself, feeling tears start to well in your eyes. 

You furrowed your brows and bit your lip, hard. You didn’t want anyone to see you cry, you didn’t want to be pitied. 

Suddenly, the doors opened wide, making you gasp and jump back, cold hands reaching to wipe any tears before you turned to see who was exiting. 

Donna came stumbling out, shushing someone inside, before closing the doors behind her. She sniffed loudly, pushing away her hair from her face right as she locked eyes with you. 

She frowned, continuing to stare at you as she walked forward to where you stood with red rimmed eyes and untouched makeup. She then moved to rifle through her purse, digging for something. 

You watched her silently, feeling your bottom lip quiver as she swayed back and forth.

You continued to watch as she pulled out a cigarette and a lighter, placing the cigarette between her red painted lips and lighting it aflame. With a deep drag and smoke sigh, she finally turned away from you.

She looked outside, staring at the gray clouds and half melted snow. It was getting colder and colder as the evening progressed, making her breaths of smoke even smokier as she breathed out. 

You turned, deciding that it was better to go inside than stand awkwardly around the mother of your boyfriend, whom you didn’t have the greatest relationship with. But right as you took a step, Donna called your name.

You glanced back at her, seeing her stumbling away from you but holding an unlit cigarette out. You were frozen to the spot, unsure whether or not to grab it and join her or go inside. But she seemed to answer that for you when she spoke up.

“Come on, I know you smoke. I’ve seen you and Carmy sneak out to smoke together sometimes during family dinners.”

You winced, feeling your cheeks heat up at having your behavior noticed by the one person you didn’t want to know, but moved forward to accept it regardless. 

As you placed the cigarette on your lips, she reached forward and lit it for you. The deep drag you took filled your lungs, making the chilly air from outside feel much more bearable. 

The two of you just stood there, side by side and silent, together, smoking. 

You burned about halfway through your cigarette before Donna spoke up, making your heart stop at her words. 

“You know… my son died, so I don't know why you are acting like you're the only one who is hurting.”

She threw the stub of her cigarette on the ground and stomped it with her shiny patent leather heel. With arms crossed, she looked at you and, with a low voice, she continued, “Everyone is just flocking to you and when no one gives you attention, you just make a scene and get them all back to you.”

Your entire body went cold.

“My poor Natalie is dealing with the death of her brother and all you do is make her wait hand and foot for you.”

Upon hearing this, all the fear in your body melted away and was replaced with burning hot anger. You knew her words were bullshit, but hearing her talk about Natalie like that, knowing how she treats her, made you clench your jaw.

In a surge of bravery, you retaliated, “Donna, how can you say that?”

She scoffed, “Please, stop acting like you are an angel who has done nothing wrong. You don’t have Mikey or anyone else here to protect you.”

Your mouth drops silently open letting the cig fall from your lips and to the ground, snuffing itself. You scanned her face with your fists balling against your side, seeing nothing but a smug look on her face as she ridiculed you.

With a sharp breath, you began, “You have never treated Natalie like a daughter. You're the one who made her the maid of your family. She practically raised Carmy and does everything for everyone. You made her act like an adult ever since she was a kid and, like everyone else, I had kept quiet about it for so many years just so we wouldn’t upset you. But I'm tired of it, this is the last straw.”

Donna rolled her eyes, “Oh puh-lease-”

But you interrupted her and continued, “So don’t act like you are suddenly concerned with how she is being treated, you never cared when you yelled at her over every little thing, so don’t start now.”

Donna looked at you, dropping her arms and glaring, “I bust my ass constantly for my children, I don't need someone like YOU pretending like you know everything-.”

“Donna, I've been around you since I was in elementary school. I grew up with your kids and around you. I know EXACTLY how you are.”

She clenched her jaw, eyes narrowing. 

But you didn’t stand down, not anymore, “None of your children are saints, but they try so fucking hard to be the best they can be given they had you as a mother. But it’s not like you would ever see that, huh?”

“All Mikey ever did was stress out, because of you! He tried to self medicate with pills and drugs and got addicted, because of you!” Donna suddenly screeched, quickly trying to divert the blame onto you.

You laughed out loud, “I’ve seen him do a couple things once or twice but Mikey was not an addict!”

Donna cackled, shaking her head furiously, “He was!! Ask Richie! Ask anyone! He was an addict, all because of you!!!”

You stepped back, eyebrows furrowing, taken aback at her words. Sure, Mikey was a bit erratic and loud, but that was his personality. He was just that type of person. And yes, he had tried a couple things before and even told you about his experience with them, but he never once did them around you or even mentioned doing them multiple times. He had vices, like smoking and having some drinks, but he wasn’t an addict.

Before you can further question, the doors were pushed open and Richie came rushing out, “What is going on?!”

You opened your mouth to respond but stopped when you heard Donna sob.

You flipped your head around to look at her but were greeted by a sight that made all that panic come barreling toward you again, replacing the anger. Donna was curled into herself, clutching onto her arms, with fat tears rolling down her face. Her sobs shook her body so violently that Richie rushed over and wrapped his arms around her to steady her. 

"What happened!?" Richie repeated, voice softer this time but just as worried as before. 

He looked at you with wide eyes as Donna sobbed, barely speaking through her gasps, "I tried to be the best mother for my children. I don't need you blaming me for my mistakes on the day of my son's funeral." 

As you watched her speak, your veins filled with ice. Only one phrase repeated in your head over and over as Richie looked between the two of you with wide eyes, ‘You fucked up, you need to leave. You fucked up, you need to leave. You fucked up, you need to leave. You fucked up, you need to leave.You fucked up, you need to leave…’

Richie called your name, making you look at him, "What happened?" 

Nothing came from your mouth but a strangled wheeze. You were frozen to the spot, pinned there by Donna's crying and Richie's stare. 

You fucked up, you needed to leave. 

Behind you, the door swung open again and your parents came rushing out with Natalie in tow. A couple peering eyes tried to look out from their seats inside, but the door closed on them before they could put together what was happening. 

"Mom!?" Natalie gasped out, rushing forward to Donna. 

Richie repeated what he said before, but you didn't hear his words. The only thing you could focus on was the way his eyes looked while staring at you, like you were a stranger. 

Donna continued to speak, saying something that was drowned out from your ears, replaced by silence and the deep throb of your heart beat. 

Right before your Mom could reach out to grab your arm, you spoke, "I need to leave, I need some time." 

You pulled the car keys from your jacket pocket and ran. 

[homemadeaxolotl]

Obey Me x TWST Chapter 2

[Back In The Devildom]

"What do you mean they're gone?! What did you do, Solomon?!"

Lucifer had lost his shit and his brothers were just as pissed, all of them in agreement for once, which was concerning. Diavolo was standing behind everyone, simply listening as Barbatos stood by his side, remaining calm despite the icy glare leveled at the sorcerer.

Before it could get too loud, Diavolo stepped forward, looking serious as everyone stepped back. Diavolo then walked over to Solomon and stood in front of him as the prince spoke in a scarily quiet voice. "Where's (Y/N), Solomon?"

Solomon sighed and shrugged as he looked at Diavolo. "If I knew where my apprentice was, I would have said so already." "What happened?" Diavolo's voice was sharp as he kept staring at Solomon, showing that he was just as irritated as the rest of the demons were.

"Well, I wanted to test a spell that should have just made them extremely small, but I must have read something wrong. I doubt it, though." Solomon tried sounding confident, but it was obvious that even he was getting nervous.

"Where did you find this spell?" Satan sounded eerily calm as he stared coldly at Solomon. Solomon cleared his throat and smiled at Satan as he handed the avatr of wrath an ancient spellbook with a neon pink sticky note sticking out of the top. Satan then carefully flipped to the page with everyone's eyes on him. Once Satan read what was on the page, he growled and shoved the book into Asmodeus' hands before slamming Solomon against the wall. "You moron! That spell doesn't make someone smaller!"

Lucifer forced Satan back, much to his irritation, as Asmodeus gasped dramatically and stared at Solomon in horror. "You sent our precious (Y/N) to another world?!"

The room fell into total silence as all the demons in the room stared at Solomon. It was so quiet that a pin could be heard, but before anyone could freak out (more than Satan and Asmo did, anyway), Diavolo spoke calmly and coldly, keeping a level head. "Solomon, you will be staying out of this. we can find a way to bring (Y/N) back."

Solomon actually looked alarmed when he heard Diavolo's words as he tried defending himself, but Diavolo wasn't having any of it. Diavolo held a hand up to silence Solomon as he spoke coldly. "You are not allowed to help us. We cannot risk messing up and you cannot be trusted currently."

With that, Lucifer and his brothers headed back to the House of Lamentation and Diavolo and Barbatos went deeper into the castle, leaving Solomon all alone in the main hall, with his only option being to go back to Purgatory Hall, regretting sending his apprentice away on accident as he tried to figure out how he was going to break the news to Simeon, Luke, and Raphael.

No one was going to be happy with Solomon and he, oddly enough, wasn't happy to be on everyone's shit list.

-----------

Alright, this is gonna be the last chapter before finals week. It was a shorter chapter, but I'll try to make the chapters after this a little longer. I'll post the 3rd chapter either the week after finals or the week after that.

It might be a bit early to say this, but thank you for all the support I've gotten for this fic so far. It's only in its early stages, but everyone has been so kind to me and so eager for more, which makes me excited to write more, so thank you!

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Taglist: @axvfr @energy-addict

[dingbatnix]

uhm lol are you going to continue maneater it is probably one of my favorites and i really want to see more of it lol take your time.

I am! Currently, I'm working on a timeline for the plot!

The way I've written this one is a little weird. It's my fourth brainchild, but since I'm already working on three multi-chapter fics already, I don't wanna start on another one. Sooo, I'm writing the timeline, and I'll post that, and then if I feel like it, I'll write fics of specific events in the timeline. It may take me a very long while, though.

And just for you, since you asked about one of my favorites, have a snippet!

Tw: murder, blood, hard vore, death

It had only been a couple of months since Punz had found out that Dream was a man-eating giant. Even more, he was a giant that could swallow and kill a human, and then gulp down somebody else without even hurting them. Punz didn’t entirely understand how that could possibly work (and he wasn’t sure that he wanted to know) but George had said that Dream had two separate stomachs; one for…one for digesting things, and one that didn’t do much of anything at all.

It was an accident, how he found out. He had been on a scouting mission with Dream, George, and Sapnap, miles and miles away from their little village of hybrids and outcasts. Punz had stayed behind to set up camp before night fell while the other three had gone ahead to make sure that the area was clear of various dangers, like mobs or any traveling hunters.

Punz had finished striking up the camp (it had been easy, all he needed to do was dig a fire pit, get some food for himself, George, and Sapnap cooking, and lay out the sleeping rolls) and had decided to follow after the rest of his group. It hadn’t been very difficult. No matter how much he claimed to be stealthy, Dream was a giant. He left a noticeable trail of destruction wherever he went. So, it had been easy enough to find them, but the sight he came to had frozen him in his tracks.

It was Dream, towering over a small path between the trees, with blood dripping down from his chin. Normally, Punz wouldn’t have been bothered. Dream ate whole animals and even mobs all the time, so Punz was used to that. No, what had terrified him was the limp, human form slumped over in the giant’s fist.

At his feet, a rickety wagon sat somewhat askew to the path, horse having broken free of its harness and, more alarmingly, Sapnap and George casually picking through the bags and chests inside the wagon. They didn’t seem to care at all as Dream raised the unmoving person higher and higher and higher, up towards his face. Punz could only watch with a gut-churning dread as the giant dropped the former owner of the cart into his mouth. There was a horrifically wet crunch, and then the distant sound of the giant swallowing.

Punz had let out a small noise of shock and stumbled back, noisily crushing forest debris underfoot and drawing the attention of the three men before him.

Like a slow, haunting owl, Dream's masked face swiveled towards Punz, and he could feel the giant's gaze lock onto his own fearful eyes. The sight sent chills dancing up and down his spine, and his mouth had dried instantly.

He had turned tail and ran, but George and Sapnap quickly caught up to him and pinned him down until Dream could catch up. Then they had all explained what was going on, that Dream actually needed to consume humans to stay sane. Then they tacked on that–that using the people who were traveling near the valley their village resided in was convenient, because word would spread that the forest was dangerous and that you'd disappear if you went in. Ergo, it kept humans away from the little sanctuary Dream, Sapnap, and George had created.

It had taken some convincing, but Punz finally relented and agreed not to say anything to anyone in the village. For one, it would invite mass panic in their little community, and most everyone would probably try to move away and die at the hands of humans. For second, Punz wasn't about to argue with the literal giant that could kill him in one bite. He wasn’t that dumb.

So, it's kinda dark, but, y'know, that's what makes it one of my favorites. Of course, the whole thing isn't just Dream running around eating people (that's more of a side note) the story is more focused on the characters, their families, and the kingdom trying to exterminate Dream and his little village.

Taglist:

@brick-a-doodle-do @i-am-beckyu @da3dm @kayla-crazy-stuffs @local-squishmallow @skullsnbruises @munchkin1156 @gt-daboss

[thief-of-eggs]

‘Thoughts of You Consume’ writing update for you all (plus a sneak peek of a later chapter)

First off, I want to say thank you to all of you who have been reading and invested in my works. Truly, I cannot tell you how much your support means to me, and it never fails to make me giggle and kick my feet when I think of how many people are enjoying my silly stories.

For everyone asking- yes, I am still writing my snowjanus longfic ‘Thoughts of You Consume’. I’ve gotten a lot of comments and asks, and it felt easier to post this then answer them all (although I still might try to)

There has been a lot that’s arisen in my personal life this past month (unexpected move, loss of a pet, relapse with my auto-immune disorder) that has caused me to put my fics on hold while I focused on getting my life back on track. (Aka- i’ve been reading a shit ton of books. Sometimes the writer just needs to be the reader for a moment)

I have not forgotten about the fic, or about all of you lovely readers! I have the next chapter half written, and I try to visit it every day to add even just a little <3

I’m hoping to have a new update for you soon, but in the meantime, as a treat- enjoy this little excerpt from a future chapter:

(Spoiler Warning)

Coriolanus is quiet as he sneaks back in to the Snow’s apartment, though he’s not entirely sure why. Surely their grandmother has already gone to bed, and it’s not like he has anything to hide. So he’d been out with a friend- that’s not too absurd is it?

Yet he still feels as though he’s done something wrong.

He begins to head straight to his room, but pauses as he passes their kitchen, seeing a candle lit on the table. His cousin is bent over her latest bit of embroidery- some tablecloth for Fabricia. He doesn’t know what leads him to it, but he finds himself walking closer, crossing in to their little kitchen.

His foot steps on a creaky floorboard, causing Tigris to startle, before laying her eyes on him.

“Oh! You’re home- I hadn’t heard you come in.”

Coriolanus hums, walking silently to their worn kitchen table, and takes a seat across from his cousin.

“Did you have a nice night?”

Again he hums, watching as she returns to her embroidery. Her needle slides delicately through the fabric, weaving an intricate floral design with mere thread alone.

“Did you eat while at the Plinths?”

A spike of fear grips his heart- how did she know where he’d been? He certainly hadn’t told her, that’s for sure. But then… where else is he known to go? He doesn’t maintain friendships outside of the Academy, hasn’t gone over to anyone’s place besides Sejnaus’s. Yes, that’s right. It was a mere logical deduction on her part, nothing more. She hasn’t picked up on anything, other than his mundane habits.

The thought eases a bit of his chest, though really, it wouldn’t be the end of the world if she knew. Tigris has come to be his one and only confidant, and the fact that he’s kept this from her so long eats away at his insides, a muddled up secret begging to be set free.

The two of them sit in relative silence for a while after. Coriolanus watches the candle sink lower and lower, his mind playing over the events of the day, playing over Sejanus’s face, Sejanus’s words, Sejanus’s everything.

Eventually, it becomes too much to bear. He opens his mouth and pauses, weighing his words in his throat before finally speaking.

“Can I- can I ask you something Tigris?”

His cousin looks up from her embroidery, her needle in hand as she peers at him in the dim light. She cocks her head, care and concern laced in her expression.

“Of course Coryo. What is it?”

Coriolanus takes in a breath, holding it carefully in his chest before releasing. He tries and fails to formulate just how to go about asking what he means. Eventually, he settles for something more cryptic than he’d have liked.

“Would it be so wrong if I were… different?” Coriolanus asks, desperately hoping Tigris will somehow pick out his deeper thoughts and meaning.

“Different how?” She replies, and Coriolanus feels his chest deflate like a balloon. Of course she couldn’t know- and he isn’t likely to tell her just now.

“Never mind,” he mumbles, standing from the table. He’s suddenly quite exhausted, and finds he’d like nothing more than to curl up and let the day be washed away in the grips of sleep.

“Coryo, wait-“

Tigris stands as well, reaching out to grab onto his arm. He allows himself to be stopped, turning to face his cousin as she steps closer, standing directly in front of him as she places her hands on his shoulders.

“Different is never bad, Coryo.” Her eyes bore intently into his, so full of tenderness, full of love and care. “You could be all sorts of different, and it wouldn’t matter one bit to me.”

Coriolanus can’t tell if she’s grasped at anything, or if her statement is truly a blanket one. But still, it makes the ache in his chest loosen, makes his eyes flood with tears that he can’t fully understand, besides knowing that they’re partly forming out of relief that his cousin wouldn’t abandon him should she find out he were disgrace to their family name.

“Thank you Tigris,” he murmurs. She reaches up to cup his cheek, gently wiping away a stray tear that falls.

“Oh Coryo,” she whipsers, before pulling him close in her arms. He buries his face in her neck, holding his breath as though he could hold in his tears, his eyes screwed shut as her hand passes gently through his hair.

He pulls back a moment later, his vision blurred by his unshed tears. “I’m off to bed,” he says with a sniff, stepping back with his gaze trained at the floor. He doesn’t wish to see Tigris’s pity in her eyes just now, doesn’t wish to see all the ways she might suspect him different.

“Alright,” she murmurs. “Sleep well Coryo.”

He nods, turning on his heel to trudge back into his bedroom. Once past the threshold, he closes his door, leaning back on the thick mahogany wood with his eyes squeezed shut, his breath held tight in his chest.

It’s no use now that he’s alone. The sobs come quietly, because Coriolanus had learned early on in life how to manage his grief in silence. Slowly, he slides down the door until he’s sitting on the barren floor. He tugs his knees up to his chest, buries his face in his hands, and weeps.

He can’t fully work out just what he’s weeping for.

[dustofthedailylife]

It hurts to let go

but sometimes it hurts more to hold on or: How they would break up with you.

→ Masterlist

Summary: How they would break up with you.

Characters: Ayato, Zhongli, Diluc x (gn!) Reader (separate)

Warnings: Angst, Hurt/No Comfort, breakups, swearing

A/N: Wooo, I'm already back with new content because I started writing this in a daze yesterday and just finished it now!! Trying to finish a new chapter for my Diluc x Fatui! Reader fic this week as well still, I wanna write as much as I can before my exams so you have something fresh to read. Asks open if you need backrubs after reading this <//3 let me know what you think! :3

AYATO

You entered Komore Teahouse bubbling with anticipation. Ayato had asked you to come here today to meet him and how could you possibly ever refuse him? 

You had barely been able to contain your excitement all day and before coming here you had even made a detour to one of his favorite food stalls in Hanamizaka to buy his favorite sakura mochi which you had neatly stashed away in your bag as a surprise for him now. You and Ayato had met each other about half a year ago in your kimono store when he had been looking for a new outfit for the local festival and despite not being able to make your relationship public yet, due to matters that concerned public affairs, you hoped that one day the moment would come and you'd finally be able to show everyone he belonged to you and vice versa. Your heart yearned for it to become a reality for the longest time already and maybe today was finally the day.

When you entered the small room and saw him sitting on the floor with a hot pot of tea on the table already you couldn’t help but smile. For the first time since you met him he wasn't busy with some sort of paperwork. He sometimes even had his retainers carry some ink and documents into the teahouse so he could work here, so today must truly be some special occasion

"Hi!", you whispered into the cozy atmosphere of the room, bubbling with anticipation. Ayato looked up at you but unlike usual, he didn’t smile, he didn't stand up to guide you to the table and press a kiss to your temple, instead he just motioned you to sit across from him at the table with an undecipherable expression on his face.

"Please sit."

You immediately knew from the way he was behaving that something was up and that it must be why he had asked you to come here today. You could feel how your heart painfully contracted and sunk to your stomach. The once cozy atmosphere of the room now suddenly felt gloomy and so heavy you’d be able to cut it if you would have a knife to do so.

When you attempted to grab his hand as you sat down, he immediately pulled it away and clawed both of his hands around his teacup instead.

“What is wrong, Ayato?”, you asked, your voice filled with concern.

“Do you want some tea?”, he tried to divert the topic. His usual soft spoken manner was nowhere to be found anymore and he was clearly attempting to avoid your gaze, by simply staring into his teacup.

“Ayato?”, you asked again, attempting to reach for his hand once more only for him to abruptly yank it away and knocking his cup of tea over in the process, spilling the hot liquid all over the table.

“I can’t do this!”, he yelled, carding through his hair in frustration with both of his hands.

“Do what?”

“Us.”

One word that struck like lightning. Your heart painfully contracted in your chest and you felt like all the air was sucked from your lungs. You felt like a ship in a tumultuous thunderstorm whose anchor was forcefully torn off from it by the crashing waves of reality, in turn being pulled into the dark depths of despair that lingered at the bottom of the ocean.

“You don’t mean that.”, you croaked after a brief silence and shook your head in disbelief, looking directly in his beautiful lavender eyes. If there had been a time where there was any emotion in his eyes in the past whenever he had looked at you, now it was all gone and all that remained was a dull expression that was devoid of any emotion. Your bottom lip started quivering and you wiped your eyes in frustration, attempting to stop the tears from falling but they did anyway, trailing warm, damp paths down your cheeks.

“I do.”

“Why?”, you cried.

“Our relationship would inevitably create problems for the Yashiro Commission and for our standing within the Shogunate, there are people who have seen us together already and the rumors are spreading. I-I cannot be with…”, he hesitated to speak out the last part of his sentence but you immediately knew what he wanted to say.

“A commoner.”, you finished his sentence for him and he replied with a defeated nod. You’ve always had a feeling that if anything was to get between you and Ayato it would be politics, which were inevitably present in his life, but the fact that you were a commoner, was not something you had ever considered to be a problem.

“So what? You thought you’d play with me for a little while and then throw me away like a kid that has had enough of his little toy?”, at this point you were screaming at him, tears violently rolling down your face both out of unbearable grief and anger towards the man sitting in front of you with that same, stupid, dead expression he has had the entire time you’ve been here today.

“Did you even love me? Or was I just your fun little side activity?”, you fumed.

“I did - and I still do.”, he muttered after a brief hesitation, looking down at his hands to try to avoid looking at you directly.

“Then why?!”

“I have sacrificed a lot to restore the reputation and standing of my family within the Shogunate and in Inazuma as a whole and I can’t risk destroying that by following through with the egoistic desires of my heart.”

Your mouth stood agape at his statement, letting out a huff, while more hot tears streamed down your face. You couldn’t believe this was how it was supposed to end.

“Do you ever think of anything but politics, Ayato? Think of yourself only for one goddamn time.”

“I can’t.”

You nodded in acceptance and got up from the table, taking out the box of sakura mochi you bought for him earlier and hurled them on the table.

“Farewell, Lord Kamisato.” 

You turned around to allow your tears to flow freely and left the room as a stranger without another word or looking back.

Once you were gone he finally allowed himself to cry. His heart was heavy with regret and grief but he knew it was for the better, not for him but for his family. There was a part inside of him that screamed at him to chase after you, beg you to forgive him and come back to him, but he knew it would inevitably end in a disaster for his clan one day, so he has to lock the matters of his heart away forever no matter how desperately he longed to be with you. But after all - politics were a lonely game to play. And who knows, maybe he deserved it.

ZHONGLI

You had just arrived at the Wangsheng-Funeral-Parlor to pick up Zhongli from work because you had agreed to grab dinner together at the Third Round Knockout like every Friday. You were waiting on the bench in front of the Parlor when Hu Tao came out to lock up the Parlor for the day, waving at you enthusiastically when she spotted you on the bench . However, she was alone.

“What are you doing here?”, she wondered.

“I’m waiting for Zhongli, like every Friday.”

“Oh.”, she said, smiling awkwardly.

“Oh?”

“He went home early today. I even asked him if you were not going out today but he told me you agreed to skip dinner this Friday.”

He did what? And when did he intend to tell you about this? You could feel the anger welling up inside of your chest but you tried to swallow it and hid it behind a polite smile in front of Hu Tao, this was only between you and Zhongli and didn’t concern her.

“I must’ve forgotten about it out of habit.”, you replied. “I’ll be off then.”

Hu Tao waved you goodbye and you immediately headed for Zhongli’s house, with flames of anger boiling in the pit of your stomach and tears biting at the corners of your eyes out of frustration.

Once you had arrived you rang his doorbell a couple of times, waiting for him to open and immediately stomped past him into his living room once he had opened.

“When had you intended to tell me that we were not going out today?”, you spat with evident vitriol in your voice, not even making an effort to greet him first. “I waited in front of the Funeral Parlor for at least thirty minutes only to then be told by Hu Tao that you already left hours ago!”

“Forgive me.”, he quietly exclaimed, staring down at his hand, twisting the ring on his thumb.

“Do you have any intent to explain to me why you didn’t tell me? If you don’t feel well, or whatever the fuck is going on then you could’ve just opened your mouth. and it would’ve been no issue. This is not like you!”

He knew you were right, this wasn’t like him. There had been a contract between you and he had violated it - you didn't have to tell him, he knew it better than anyone.

“Please sit down for a minute.”, he said, pulling out a chair for you, his eyes showing evident sadness. “I think we need to talk.”

Your heart sank to the pit of your stomach and your chest suddenly felt constricted by the calm yet serious tone of his voice. You stared at the chair he had pulled out for you in shock, petrified on the spot you couldn't do anything but panic.

“What’s going on?”

Zhongli brushed over his face with both of his hands and exhaled a few times heavily as if he needed to mentally prepare himself for the words he was about to speak next.

“I think it’s for the best if we stop seeing each other.”, he said after a brief moment of silence. Fixating his amber eyes on yours that began to fill with tears. The initial anger you came here with had dissipated and was replaced by an indescribable emptiness that felt like your heart had been ripped out of your chest.

“Zhongli, I’m sorry… if it is because I was so angry when I arrived here I-… just, please.”, you pleaded, tears now uncontrollably rolling down your cheeks and blurring your vision.

“It has nothing to do with that, dearest. Forgive me. All I am able to tell you is that it is not your fault. It’s for your best.”, he walked towards you and cupped your trembling hands with his own ones before you forcefully yanked them away from him again.

“How would you know what is best for me? I don’t want to lose you…”, you sobbed.

“I just want you to be happy.”

It was true, you were his everything and all he ever wanted for you was to be happy and he knew he wouldn’t be able to give you that. He wouldn't be able to grow old with you together, he wouldn't be able to have you by his side forever and just the mere thought of it killed him on the inside. You deserved to be happy with someone who could give you all that and more, more than he would ever be able to give you, for he was a god and you were a mortal. Was it selfish of him to push away the one he loved the most, the one who gave him so much comfort when no one else could, just so you could live a fulfilled life with someone whose clock ticks the same as yours? You would eventually get over him, find someone new and learn to love again, maybe even have a family of your own - things he would never be able to give you. Maybe it was selfish, but it would be even more selfish if he kept you around only to save his own heart from bleeding, because in the end your life would just fly by in the blink of an eye for him whereas he would be your whole world. It didn't seem fair - you deserved better - and he wished he could tell you the whole truth about why you did.

Seeing you cry, with puffy eyes and damp cheeks, made his heart feel sore and he wished he would have never been so selfish as to allow himself into your life.

"I can't be happy without you.", you muttered through quiet sobs but ultimately accepted the fact that this is where your fairytale ended. You looked Zhongli deep in his amber irises for one last time, which too looked glossy, his eyebrows turned into and evident frown and turned around, leaving his house. Standing on his doorstep you turned around to get one last final look at him, ushering a final I love you into the evening breeze, before closing this chapter of your life forever.

And thus your contract had ended. 

Zhongli wondered why fellow gods were always so fond of their immortality when all it had brought him was unimaginable loss and grief that he had to carry in his heart for all eternity. To him Immortality was a curse and you did not deserve to be the one to share this burden with him for the rest of your life.

DILUC

You woke up in the middle of the night, looking at the alarm clock on your nightstand showed it was 3:24 a.m. Shifting around on the bed you found the other side of it cold and empty, the side where Diluc was supposed to be right now but you were alone - again. 

You kicked away your blanket and slipped into your morning gown, walking into the living room and kitchen of your apartment to check if Diluc was maybe still up doing something. But no matter where you looked you were alone, he had left yet again without a trace.

Slightly frustrated you decided it was no use heading back to bed now anyway, so you brewed yourself a fresh cup of tea in the kitchen and sat down on your sofa to read a book. You don’t know how much time passed when you heard someone unlock your front door but you assumed it must’ve been a couple of hours since the sun was already showing its first bright rays above the horizon. 

Your anger had festered over the past couple of hours that you had sat in your living room, barely even being able to read the book in front of you, because your thoughts were just constantly spiraling around Diluc. Ever since you had found out about his little nighttime job you rarely ever had a peaceful night.

The man in question finally entered your living room and when he saw you sitting on the sofa his expression changed to the one of a child whose mother had caught them stealing candy out of the sweets jar in the kitchen before dinner. He looked at you knowingly, evident guilt painted on his face, knowing you were up already because he had been out again.

“Why are you already up?”

“Good morning to you, too, mister. Care to tell me where you were again? Did Mondstadt need you so desperately again that you had to go out all night again fending off monsters?”, you huffed.

“The Abyss Order–”

“–would overrun Mondstadt if it weren’t for you and the Knights are useless, bla bla. I get it.”

The silence that followed after your words was charged with your anger, his crimson eyes trained on you with guilt. He knew you were right but what else was he supposed to do?

“What do you expect me to do?”, he asked calmly.

“What do I expect you to do?”, you asked in disbelief, closing the book that had still been on your lap, slamming it on the coffee table in front of you. “I expect you to stop playing hero and finally prioritize yourself first. Prioritize me. Have you ever thought about the way I feel when you’re going out every night doing fuck-knows what?”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

“Of course you didn’t because all you ever think about is your precious Mondstadt. How could I even be so foolish to think I could compete with it? To think I’d stand a chance to possibly mean more to you than this goddamn city. I need you too, Diluc. But you are never there for me! Fuck, I didn’t even have a single night of proper sleep ever since I found out about your hero antics! You are gone every night!”

Every word you spoke stung in his heart but he kept quiet, enduring the thunderstorm of your rightful rage and wondered what he should do, what he could do to end the heartaches and sleepless nights he had been continually causing you, robbing you of your sleep, causing you distress and making you feel unappreciated. Even though the mere thought of it caused his heart to ache in his chest, he knew there was only one possible answer to this.

“Where are you going?”, you asked with uncertainty becoming evident in your voice as he walked past you into the bedroom. As you followed him you saw he had grabbed his bag and had opened the wardrobe, taking his clothes that he had stored here for when he had been staying over out of it and putting them in his bag.

“What are you doing?” 

Panic started to well up inside of you. You hoped that your eyes were deceiving you and that what he was doing didn’t mean what you assumed it meant. The fact he kept silent and wasn’t even looking at you basically confirmed your assumptions and you could feel tears burning at the corners of your eyes and a lump forming in your throat. This is not what you had wanted and the fact that he was truly choosing this city over you hurt even more on top of it.

“Are you leaving me?”, you coaxed, tears flowing down your face, standing in the middle of the room completely petrified. He closed his bag and flung it over his shoulder, looking at you with a deep frown on his face before slowly nodding.

“It will be for your best, you deserve better than me.”

At that moment reality crashed over you like an avalanche, burying you under layers upon layers of icy grief. You regretted getting mad at him, regretted confronting him about his activities because you had just irreparably destroyed what you had. If you were given the opportunity to turn back the time right then and there you would - going back to bed after waking up, knowing Diluc would return to you in the morning and spending another day with him, but you took that away from yourself now.

Diluc looked at you with a lingering sadness on his face, heading for the frontdoor and neatly placing the spare key to your apartment, which you had given him so he could enter at will, on the key hooks beside your door. He looked back at your shaking form in the doorway to your bedroom, throwing you a regretful smile as he walked out into the cool morning air.

As soon as the door clicked shut behind him you weakly sunk to your knees on the carpet, letting your tears flow uncontrollably, sobbing loudly into your hands. 

Mondstadt had won.

If you liked this I'd appreciate a reblog or comments ❤️😊

TAGLIST: @irethepotato @ranhaitanisbraids @x-zho @stygianoir

Do not repost, copy, translate or edit - © dustofthedailylife, 2022

Maple dividers are mine - do not copy.

[minhosimthings]

Je Te Veux:A Jay Fic

Chapter 1: Sugar Bowls and Handsome Strangers

Summary : Lee Y/N, youngest daughter of the Lee empire which rules of South Korea, meets a stranger one night at a party. Only fate knows what happens to both of them.

Pairings: Fem!Reader × RichHeir!Jay, includes rest of Enha. Mentions of Itzy, stray kids and other groups in the coming chapters!

Warnings: Mentions of food and alcohol, mention of bullets, reader fantasizing about Jay's fingers, Reader wears a dress and a sports bra.

A/N: This is my first work everyone! I don't have much experience in these things so please give me mental support. I'm just a delusional girl in my Jay era.

No poet, musician, lyricist, author, scriptwriter or painter could explain the love you had for Park Joengsaeng. And yet here you were standing in your garden,trying to deny your feeling for him as you ramble to your older brother.

You had met him at a nice little party hosted by your filthy rich parents. You were bumbling off on your own by the dangling lanterns when you noticed another boy fiddling with his glass of Champagne. He had a black Burberry suit on with an emerald brooch stuck to his breast pocket. And he looked like the most handsome person in the crowd of rich people and their snobbish children. After all, your parents were the owners of the biggest jewelry company in South Korea and quite frankly, the entire world. All of these old men and women and boys and girls dressed in silk and chiffon were the owners and heirs to luxurious companies. You had known every person at that party because of forced introductions from your parents, but still you had never seen this peculiar boy standing at the christmas tree all on his own. He looked simply dressed compared to all the other boys there, who were dressed in suits of reds, greens and purples with pearls hanging from their trousers and their necks. But yet, he stood out and looked more sleek than anyone else. And in a flash, his eagle- like eyes pierced yours and you were slightly startled. Who was this mysterious stranger and why did he make your soul leap up? You quickly looked at your Jimmy Choo heels and then at the skirt of you green Versace dress which your mother had finally allowed you to wear. The dress wasn't anything immodest. It was a half shoulder cotton dress, sparkly and knee length which attracted many teenage heirs who flirted shamelessly with you. Thankfully you knew how to get rid of them with your quick tongue and sharp wit, which your mother despised and you father was proud of. Although you thought that perhaps it was your brother, Heeseung who scared them off. Ah yes your brother. Mr Lee Heeseung, heir to the golden empire of the Lee Family which has been handed down for centuries. He was a charming young lad who had girls swooning over him 24/7. Unfortunately for them, he had a girlfriend, Shin Yu-Na of the silk empire of the Shin family. She was sweet, beautiful and the greatest future sister in law you could ever wish for. Your brother always had his gang of six heirs around him. They were his best friends from childhood as your parents were partners with their parents. You had met all of them and were on first name terms. Well, all except for one. Park Jay on the vast Park empire of weaponry and alcohol. He had a younger brother Park Sunghoon, who you were already friends with. But Jay was, invisible to say the least. You had never seen him in person and had only known him from what your brother spoke of him. Even your parents had never seen him. But you weren't curious. You were always focused on your writing career and plus, you had your brother's friends with you too. You mind snapped back to reality as your mother called you over to the champagne table. You looked to see where the stranger was but he was gone. Shaking your head, you led your way towards your parents, your brother, his friends and Yuna. All of then were sitting with their fancy suits and dresses and raising their glasses filled with bubbly alcohol to their mouths. You sat down next to Heeseung and Yuna and joined the conversation. Heeseung looked at you and remarked "Ah Y/N you've finally graced us with your unholy presence."

You playfully slapped his arm and turning to Yuna, you asked "How are you Unnie? How's Ryunjin Unnie?" Yuna answered "You brother has been spoiling me awfully after forgetting our anniversary. Ryunjin's fine. She's focusing on dance for now." You nodded and looked down the table to see Sim Jayeun or Jake, the eldest son of a vast empire of fuels, talking to your father. Next to them were Kim Sunoo and Yang Jungwon, step brothers who ran the cotton buisness in the country. Further down the table were Park Sunghoon and Nishimura Riki who was the youngest son of a Japanese empire who ruled over the ocean and its belongings.

Slowly you turned your head towards your father. You watched as from the shadows behind your father's chair emerged a boy in a black suit. It was him! The mysterious stranger! He slowly smiled at you and Heeseung as he made his way to sit next to Sunghoon, but not before giving a warm hug to your brother and muttering "it's been a long time brother". Heeseung and Yuna beamed at him while you looked at him more clearly this time. Gosh he was handsome. You wondered absent-mindedly of his age when Yuna leaned in and said " It's Jay. Thank god he came. Heeseung was dying. He's your age Y/N. And he's handsome. Might wanna think about something with him ya know?" You flushed red as you got up with everyone else to head to the dining table to for dinner. You locked your arms with Sunoo, who was probably the closest to you and questioned "Sunoo, why have I and hundreds of other guests here, never met Jay?" Sunoo looked at you with his fox eyes, smirked and answered "He's a mysterious man noona. The only people here who have met him more than one time are Heeseung hyung and Sunghoon hyung. They say he's shy and likes to keep to himself. Even I have only met him on three occasions. He is attractive though and your age, if you still want a ring on your finger." Sunno giggled under his breath and you playfully slapped his arm and went to sit down somewhere and pounce on your food. Unfortunately as you reached the table, Heeseung called out to you, motioning to a seat between him and Jay. "No, Oh no I can't sit next to him! I'm gonna puke" Your brain started on its anxious train of thoughts again as you sat down next to brooding man with dark hair and piercing eyes. You tried to avoid his gaze, but still couldn't help but look at his handsome arms and fingers that could keep you up all night. He ate his food with such grace that you thought he must have been brought up by a ballerina. You didn't try to talk to him and instead scanned the table trying to catch the eye of someone you know. You thankfully caught the eye of Jake and motioned subtly towards Jay as if to say 'help me'. Jake, however only smiled and proceeded to put mashed potatoes on Riki's plate all the while taking about how thin he's gotten. You rolled you eyes at the Mama bird Jake moment and instead reached across for the sugar bowl to top your tea with. As you sipped on the warm liquid, a soothing voice cut across and asked "May I please have the sugar bowl?"You looked to your right at Jay, who was looking at you with those beautiful galaxies in his eyes and extending a hand towards the sugar bowl. "Oh" you stole your eyes away from his and took the sugar bowl "Of course." You handed him the wooden bowl as your hands brushed against his and smiled as he thanked you and gave you a small smile. As dinner finished and the sugar bowl moment still lingered in your brain, you father called you and your brother and his six companions (including Jay) over to the wine fountain where their parents were also present. You walked along with Jungwon and stood next to Yuna and your mother as everyone engaged in small talk. Your brother took you in hand and guided you over to Jay who was staring at the skyline from the large glass windows. "Jay. I want to introduce you to someone. This is Lee Y/N, an aspiring writer and my younger sister" Jay turned to you and looked you up and down, as if checking a dress on a mannequin. He extended his hand and you shook it, taking note of the scars that decorated it.Turning to you, Heeseung said "Jay is the heir to the Park family and he's your age. He barely comes to see me because apparently his work is his lover." He shot Jay a smirk while Jay looked on nonchalantly. "He also wanted to be a writer you know? I wonder what happened to that dream." Jay furrowed his eyebrows and said "That dream is impossible to accomplish with what I do everyday. Plus, didn't you wanna be a car mechanic when you were younger hyung?" Heeseung chuckled and replied "That's exactly what Y/N says whenever I bring up her writing career."

Yuna came over soon and putting her hand on her boyfriend , she said "You mother is asking for you Seungie. Why don't we leave Jay and Y/N to chat for a while?" Heeseung nodded and left with Yuna by his side, but not before both of them threw you devious smirks.You awkwardly picked up two glasses of wine from a tray and gave one to Jay. He muttered a thank you and stared out the window again at all the bulidings. In an attempt to make conversation with him you started with the sentence "So, how are liking the party?". Jay looked at you as you mentally slapped yourself for asking such a boring question, but you couldn't think straight whilst admiring his visual. His stunning eyes and his glamorous hair, styled in curls and his eagle like stare put you in a bit of a temporary limbo."It's nice. Never been to one outside of my parent's parties actually. I usually just stay in the corners until everyone leaves and then I stuff myself with food up in my room", he confessed and you heart took a turn as you said "Me too actually. I just attend for the alcohol and to judge everyone's dresses". You hoped that he hadn't taken those last words in a wrong way but he chuckled and smiled. "Surprisingly you do the exact same thing I do." He sipped his wine again and you took in those beautiful fingers again wondering what they would be like inside of you. "So Y/N," Jay leaned against the window "I might ask you a boring question but what are your plans for the future?" You stole your eyes away from his lips ( with much difficulty) and replied in what you hoped was your normal voice "Well, as my brother mentioned, I do have plans to be a writer. I interned a bit as an editor at a publishing company. But my parents have hopes that I will run the designer part of the company one day. They seem to think I have a good eye for fashion, but in all honesty, I just know about a goose egg's worth about it." Jay's mouth twitched a bit as he asked "Did you choose the dress and shoes yourself?" "Yes. This is one of my most favourite dresses but unfortunately for my mother it's too 'distracting'. Thankfully she let me wear it." You took note of the small smiles Jay gave you in between sentences, which you hoped was him saying 'hey this conversation is interesting'.

Your brother soon came to get you as you had embarked on the very interesting topic of emeralds and sapphires with Jay."Hey lovebirds. The party's over and everyone's left. Well almost everyone" he said glancing over at the 5 boys trying to stack wine glasses. Your heart leapt again on hearing the word 'lovebirds'. Jay however looked unbothered as he kept his wine glass on the table and made his way to hug Heeseung again. "I'll see you tomorrow brother. Hopefully in better clothes. Miss Y/N" He said bowing to you. You bowed back as he took your hand and kissed it. Yep if you weren't in love earlier, you certainly were now. Jay made his way to the door with Heeseung's arm around him and you slowly made your way to Sunoo and the rest of the boys, all the while admiring Jay's broad shoulders. "I don't care what my parents say. I'm crashing here tonight in Heeseung hyung's room." Sunghoon stretched and put his arm around Sunoo, who started blushing like crazy. You smiled warmly at Jungwon who smiled back and glanced at Sunghoon and Sunoo, who you knew had a crush on the former. "Well if you all are gonna sleep here, shouldn't we ask our parents first?" You questioned Jake, who was busy wiping a stain on his white blazer. "You're right and we have already done that Y/N. All of them are getting drunk in the cellar now. I expect they won't wake up tomorrow that soon to discuss deals again." He wiped the sweat on his forehead and continued "I had hoped Jay would stay but seems like Heeseung hyung is already dropping him off." You don't know why but that sentence made you weirdly sad. "Noona, noona look what I can do" Riki's voice rang in your ears as he tried and failed to do a handstand. He stood up and looked at you with puppy eyes as Jake chuckled and whispered "He's had five drinks and he's already drunk. Kid has the lowest tolerance I've ever seen". You smiled to yourself and called Jungwon to take Riki upstairs to the guest bedrooms as Riki muttered something along the lines of "I can take care of myself Jungwon hyung. Let go". You prepared to go upstairs yourself as the oak doors opened and Heeseung and Jay stepped back in. You froze at the sight of Jay's messed up hair and his slightly opened shirt. Heeseung wore a proud look on his face and said "Well I managed to convince mr grumpy here to stay the night cause we need to discuss buisness tomorrow anyway so Y/Nah would you please take him up to the guest bedroom next to your room?" You threw a glare at Heeseung as he innocently smiled and pushed Jay towards you. "Of course. Come on Mr. Park." You guided him upstairs and showed him to the brown oak door next to the blue one with your name carved in. "There you go Mr.Park. I'm sure you'll be comfortable. Ring the bell if you need anything". You pointed towards the tiny golden bell attached to the door as Jay smiled and said "Please Miss Y/N. Call me Jay. Thank you for your kindness. I'll see you tomorrow." He threw you a wink and quickly shut the door as you went into your own room and kicked the air as you mentally fed yourself the delusion that Jay was definitely your soulmate.

The next day, you woke up in your bed and tossed around on your red pillows for 5 minutes before getting up and walking sluggishly to the bathroom. You definitely only had two glasses of champagne and a glass of wine last night but your head said otherwise. It was still 7:48 by the time you got out the bathroom and into your sports bra and gym shorts. You went down and were greeted by a very quite hall. You usually got up early to take a run around your garden and work out before heading to breakfast with everyone else. You made a mental note to remind Heeseung of his promise to play basketball with you today. You heard snoring noises from the other guest bedrooms and assumed that it was all the parents and their heirs crashed out from last night's party. Passing by Jay's room (and ignoring the urge to open it like those K Dramas you watch) you noticed it was locked from the outside. Your family's mansion had a unique key system where you could figure out when it was locked from the inside and when it was locked from the outside. Shrugging it off, you made you way downstairs, drank your very sweet coffee, ate a banana half heartedly and made your way out the doors. The bodyguards were still there and they smiled as you greeted them. You always had a great relationship with your bodyguards. Being the daughter of one of the most powerful people in South Korea meant that a sniper could be roaming anywhere. Your bodyguard, Chan, was six years older than you and a great father figure. He was always by your side and had even took two bullets for you once.

You started your run from the marigold bushes and decided to run to the koi pond today, five times more than what you had run two days ago. Plugging your ear buds in you put on the 5 Star Album (go stream it again and again) and picked up the pace as the beat of the song got faster. You had reached your favourite sycamore tree when you noticed a man doing push ups by the great chestnut trees. Curious, you abandoned your run, stopped your songs and silently creeped up and hid behind another tree. Then you recognised those beautiful curls of hair of Park Jay. That explains the locked door of his room! You admired his agility for a solid five minutes while staring at his biceps which were visible from the tank top he was wearing. While wondering how his arms would look wrapped around you, his eyes caught yours just as they did the night before. He got up from his position and exclaimed, with a smile, in that soothing voice "If you're done staring, you can come out from behind the tree, Miss Y/N". Startled, you bounced out from behind the tree and awkwardly stood there. "I'm sorry. I was on my run and usually no one's awake by this time. Bit surprising you got up this early from last night's party" You hoped that your reply was enough to satisfy him. He shot you a grin and said "Well I was just about to pack up and head back. But seeing as you're here, might you want to head back with me?". Your heart was going to explode like it does in cartoons when a character is in love. You muttered a small "yes" and waited as Jay packed up his bottle and yoga mat. You took note of his shoulders again. God, he looked like Achilles and Hercules combined.

The walk back to the mansion was surprisingly calm. You ambled across the grass and Jay walked in his usual collected manner, both of you not speaking a word to each other. You shot him tiny glances now and then and hoped that he hadn't seen you creepily staring at him every moment. You reached the mansion as your bodyguards opened the doors and you were greeted by loud chatter as everyone was happily breakfasting. You cringed and tightened your shoulders, thinking about how your parents would react to your sweaty self arriving at their front door, accompanied by your brother's best friend's sweaty self. Jay, trotted slowly towards Heeseung, grabbed a glass of water, muttered a 'your sister caught me in the garden' and disappeared upstairs. After he was well out of earshot, you mother, Sunoo and Sunghoon all said at once "What were you doing with Jay, Y/N?",whilst wiggling their eyebrows. Surprised at their syncronicity and annoyed at the question, you simply replied "I was out on a run to the koi pond and I spotted Jay doing pushups and then we walked back to the house together after sweating our asses off. Happy?" You glared at your mother and ran off upstairs to take a shower and change into much better smelling clothes. Reaching your door, you noticed a pink sticky note stuck on top of the carving of your name. On it was written, in loopy handwriting "Sorry for leaving you alone to deal with that. Wanna have a glass of afternoon wine to make it up to you?". It was signed 'Jay'. Your heartbeat ran an entire marathon as you entered your parchment covered room and went directly to the shower. You picked up your coffee scented shampoo and ran the lather through the strands of your hair. Wearing your tank top and bell bottoms, you went down to finally fullfill your rumbling tummy. Reaching the now, clean table with only one plate (yours) present, you picked up your fork and gorged on the scrambled eggs.

The rest of the morning went in a breeze as you (im) patiently waited for afternoon to arrive. Jay and the rest of the boys and your parents went off to the main hall to discuss buisness while you, Yuna, Riki and Sunoo, who had thankfully escaped from the meeting went out. Sunoo and Yuna went to buy earrings and you and Riki got stuck at the arcade, trying to win some fake gold coins (which upon learning that they were Taiyaki coupons, Riki became more determined). After Riki finally won the Pac-Man game, both of you sat down to take a breath and sip on your melted slushies. "So noona, what's going on between you and Jay Hyung?" Riki innocently sipped his drink while looking at you with his cheetah like eyes. You gave him a sour glare and said "Nothing's going on between me and Jay. We literally just met last night and fate was just cruel to me today that I had to meet him in the garden" Riki gave you a confused look and replied "But, doesn't Jay Hyung like you? He always drooled over pictures of you which he saw in Heeseung hyung's photos. Eh I don't know. I'm too young for this." He took a big sip of his red slushy as you sat there, dumbfounded and wanting to burst into a thousand paper pieces.

That's it y'all. The next chapter will probably be out in a while cause I also have some college work to do too. But I will release it from the grasps of my notes app soon. Look forward to it!!!

[galvanizedfriend]

Fic Update: We'll Always Have New Orleans [3/15]

Summary: Caroline wakes up in a world where everything looks exactly the same, only nothing really is. For starters, she's no longer a vampire, and no one else in Mystic Falls has ever heard of witches, vampires or werewolves - no one except for Klaus, who woke up just as human and twice as angry about it. Their search for answers and a way out takes them all the way to New Orleans, and Caroline could never anticipate how much this crazy fake world was about to alter her reality forever.

[Canon!AU. Set right after TVD 4x18.]

--

When Caroline goes to sleep that night, she dreams like she hasn't in a very long time. In her dream, she's at school, and so is everyone she knows - her mom, Elena, Stefan, Damon, Tyler, Bonnie, Matt. Even Klaus. They're all staring at her as though they're being held in suspense, expressions wrought with anticipation as they wait for her to do something, say something. It's huge and meaningful, possibly life-changing, and it depends entirely on what she will do next, but Caroline has no idea what they expect from her. She feels suffocated under the weight of their stares. She doesn't want to let them down, but she already gives them everything she's got, her absolute best, all the time. Isn't it enough? Something breaks. It all becomes too much. If she stands there for one more second, she will burst into flames, and so she starts running as fast as she can. She doesn't know where she's going, but that hardly matters. She just has to get away. Far from the people, the stares, the expectations she can never meet. She runs until her lungs are screaming for air, until her muscles cramp up, until her heart feels as though it's about to beat itself out of her chest. Still, she doesn't stop. Caroline keeps going, pushing past all of her limits, until she hits water. A lake, to be more precise. Its surface is dark and absolutely still, so big she can't see the other side. Caroline doesn't think, she just walks in, cold water swallowing her like a thousand needles piercing her skin. Still it doesn't deter her; she just starts swimming, legs prompting her forward while her arms break through the ice cold ahead of her with as much determination as she can muster. She doesn't know why, but she knows in her guts that her life depends on this, hinges precariously on the perfect coordination of her movements and the sheer strength of her will. She has to keep going. She swims for a long time, what feels like hours, barely breaking the surface to breathe. When she can no longer remember why she started running in the first place, what she was running from, her mind a perfect blank space, Caroline stops. There's no sign of land ahead of her, and when she looks back, she sees nothing. Mystic Falls is gone. She's all alone in the middle of an infinite lake, a harsh grey sky above her. No sound, no movement. Time itself seems extinguished. That's when exhaustion finally creeps in, all at once. Caroline doesn't resist. She closes her eyes, a shuddering breath escaping her lips, and lets go. Her body begins to sink, heavy, heavy, heavy, down into the endless depths of the lake, but she's not scared. For once, she's completely at peace. Her chest is light as a plume. It's over, she thinks. Finally. And then she wakes up.

[Read the full chapter here]

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Well, it's been a minute! Sorry for the delay, I have nothing to say in my defense except life sucks and I can't write. Hope you enjoy the update!

[stop-talking]

I loveee your Derek fic! IK you said you’ve been kind of stumped lately and I have a suggestion if you don’t mind. Maybe add more to the reader to give her character more personality? Like make her a recovered addict so her and Derek can relate/bond more? Just a suggestion!

I'm so sorry for the wait on ch. 7!!!

I have been writing, just... it's currently a one thousand word incomprehensible blurb of feelings & thoughts, broken up by a few lines of dialogue here and there.

I don't know what to tell you guys as to WHY it's taking so long... other than I just haven't felt right.

Usually when I'm writing, I can see the scenes play out in my head like a movie, and it's just a matter of describing what I see. Like I'm fucking hallucinating.

Sometimes writing is super easy, because I've been replaying the same scene over and over in my head for days and I already intimately know how every little detail should play out.

Sometimes I have to do a little bit of prompting to get the scene to come together. (writing the little blurbs about how each character is feeling usually helps)

But recently, even that did not save me and I just could not see the story. I know that probably makes no fucking sense, but hey, the creative process is different for everyone and I don't think I'm going to be able to describe this abstract process using concrete words.

Basically the vibes have been off. Usually it only takes a few hundred word chapter outline to get me going, but this one took a thousand words before I could finally see the story.

But yes. I finally see the story. And I'm honestly probably going to wait and outline the next few chapters as well before I start actually writing, it'll just make it easier for me in the long run.

So yeah, gonna be a couple days on chapter 7... but when it does finally come out the wait for chapters 8, 9, and 10 shouldn't take too long. And I already know exactly how I want the epilogue to go... (it might even be two parts)

To anon:

I like your suggestion about making the reader a recovering addict as well, and I actually thought about doing that when I was first writing this. The problem is, I'm just not confident enough in my ability to write a character that's gone through that kind of a struggle in a realistic & respectful manner, seeing as I've never gone through that myself.

(I'm doing my best with Derek already, and I'm still not satisfied with how easy it's been for him. I feel like he should be more anguished 😭)

Anyway, it's also a little late in the story to suddenly reveal that she's been though the same thing he has. I mean, the story is partly told from her perspective, and i feel like she would have thought about it before, even if she never revealed it to Derek.

It's an interesting thought, though, and thank you all for being so paitent!

P.S

I'm at 197 followers, so submit some deranged jhutch smut requests for a 200 follower special. (I'll write just about anything other than non-con, underage, pissplay, that sort of thing.)

I'll pick one and write a short one-off AFTER chapter 7 of SISOTSIAICEHAS. (Wow, even the acronym is terrible.)

And to the person that requested the Clapton Davis fic... it's in my drafts. It will see the light of day eventually. Sorry.

[chr0macide]

Orientation Day

posting two things one day wow im on fire

i kinda wanted to write a lil bit about magdalena but this fic ended up being more about purge university and shes kinda just there lol. i didn't put anything about her time in college while i was making her intro post cause i was lazy. i said she made no friends but maybe that was cap, she did meet markus there.

this shows a little bit about what i think purge university is like. it wouldn't be the same for every student but this is more or less what i think it would be like for the impoverished attendee. i write this fanfic as if break in happens in the "real(ish) world" instead of roblox so stuff has to be different. and yeah this is canon to the rest of the fic unless i start feeling like something conflicts with game canon too much.

also im seeing people with like 100 ocs when it took 100% of my power just to make this single one, lmao how are you guys doing that 😂

alright this is like 3300 words divided into 2 chapters les goooo

Chapter I – Ticket to Nowhere

“Purge University, huh? You excited?” asked the taximan.

The girl did not reply. He looked at her in the rear-view mirror and pouted when she simply lay her head against the window. Nobody waved goodbye to her.

Magdalena was the first one in her family to attend college at all—not that her relatives appreciated that—but she had thought she was finally about to leave this decaying urban hellscape. And yet, every request she’d sent to every collegiate and federal financial aid office had returned the same response to her. Denied. Denied. Denied.

It didn’t make any sense. Much to the disdain of her parents, she had studied until the dregs of coffee had long since dried into a rock-hard crust at the bottom of her cup, lest she be stuck in this slum forever, so why was she still here?

The taxi meandered through the streets and over a pothole. There were plenty of those in Magdalena’s neighborhood. She pinched the bridge of her nose as the motion briefly jerked her out of her brooding.

“Sorry. Wherever our taxes are going, it’s not towards the roads,” the driver chuckled. Magdalena rolled her vacant eyes. Everyone knew where the city’s coffers were going. Straight into the pockets of one of the local mafia dons… but maybe she ought not to complain. It was thanks to one of them that Magdalena was going to college at all, although the interest rate on her loan was horrendous and it came with the stipulation that she attended Purge University. Tuition was exorbitant there, not to mention that the place was notoriously corrupt. While Magdalena would admit it was preferable to living in a leaky trailer for the rest of her life, she would rather have gone literally anywhere else. She should have been anywhere else, the girl seethed inwardly. There was nothing she could do about the situation now, but the thoughts had kept intruding ever since she’d opened the acceptance letter.

The crumbling structures in her district became less dilapidated as the car approached the university. The college grounds rested on the boundary between the destitute and the affluent, so the buildings here looked like they actually might be livable on the inside.

The driver pulled into the parking lot outside the residence hall.

Well, some of the buildings looked like they might have been livable.

The driver ducked out of the car and removed Magdalena’s lone suitcase from the trunk. She put a few crumpled notes in his palm.

“Let me help you carry your-”

“No,” Magdelana cut him off.

The taximan looked at her for a moment longer, but she was already walking away, so he shrugged as he got back into his car and drove off.

Magdalena swiped her identification card. The scanner beeped. She pushed the door open and stepped inside, not really minding the odor of mildew. Her home didn’t smell too different.

“You don’t gotta use your card. The lock doesn’t work,” said a nearby voice with a slight accent. There was a burly student sprawled across an entire sofa in the lobby. Magdalena guessed by the color of his ID lanyard that he was a sophomore. She made a sound of acknowledgement and made her way to the front desk, but there was nobody there.

“The receptionist went on break. Beer?” offered the student.

“I’m underage.”

“Nobody in here gives a shit, believe me,” he said as he tossed her a can from the 6-pack on the end table. She caught it in her hand and stared at it for a second.

The student gave her an odd look. “What? Never drank before?”

It wasn’t that. Magdalena had booze a few times when her family’s water had been cut off. Her parents didn’t keep much else in the fridge. Magdalena popped the tab open and took a sip as another student came down the stairs.

“Where’s the RA?” the newcomer demanded.

The sophomore craned his neck to see who had just shown up. “Oh, hey, Isaiah. I think he’s out back. Why?”

“My roommate ripped the fucking sink out of the—is that my beer? I just fucking bought that!”

“Relax, man. I was gonna pay you back.”

Magdalena placed her can on the reception desk sheepishly, but Isaiah wasn’t paying attention to her.

“Like hell you were,” snapped Isaiah as he grabbed the remainder of the 6-pack off the table and stormed out of the lounge.

The lingering student took another swig. “Sheesh. I’d like to tell you he’s not always so bitchy, but… heh.”

The door behind the front desk finally swung open. “ID?” requested the receptionist. The lady didn’t glance twice at the can on the counter as Magdalena handed her card over. She didn’t know whether to be glad for that or concerned that this hall had such lax restrictions.

The receptionist passed a key to Magdalena along with her ID. “Room 217,” she told the girl.

“Hey, we’re roommates,” the sophomore piped up. He chugged the rest of his beer. “I’ll show you where our dorm is.”

Magdalena started towards the elevator as he stood up. His orange hair almost brushed one of the light fixtures hanging from the ceiling.

“The elevator doesn’t work, either,” he advised her.

Magdalena sighed. “Of course it doesn’t.”

The student lifted Magdalena’s luggage with one hand and carried it up the stairs for her. “Name’s Markus, by the way.”

“Magdalena.”

“I haven’t seen you before. You a freshman?”

She nodded

Markus set her suitcase down in front of their dorm. The smell of cigarette smoke clung to the discolored runner. Their neighbor’s door was open. Magdalena could hear pressurized water spouting out from somewhere inside, but Markus didn’t seem to notice as he unlocked their own dorm. “Sorry about the mess. Old roommate left most of his stuff behind.”

Notebooks and stationery were strewn across the desk. There was a backpack and a large folder on the ground underneath it. Even a laptop was still resting on the nightstand. Magdalena’s side of the room looked as if someone else still lived here.

“Did he graduate?” the girl asked.

Markus’s expression hardened abruptly. “No.”

He didn’t elaborate, but his tone warned her not to probe any further. “But they assigned me a new roommate,” he said, gesturing at Magdalena, “so I doubt he’s coming back. I guess you can keep some of his junk if you want. I’ll throw the rest of it out tomorrow.”

If Markus was reluctant to speak of him, it wasn’t hard to deduce what might have happened to the last tenant. Perhaps Markus’s roomie pissed off one of the mob’s higher-ups. Those who talked about it out loud too often were prone to disappearing, but most people knew Purge University doubled as a front for organized crime. Too bad for him, but Magdalena wasn’t one to turn down free stuff.

She moved to the nightstand and opened the laptop. It was greasy. Magdalena wiped her fingers on her coat. There was a password, but she was sure the IT department could deal with that.

“Huh. Almost didn’t think it would turn on,” Markus remarked. Yeah, the thing was pretty ancient. The fan sounded like it was on its last legs and there was duct tape over a corner where the plastic exterior had cracked. “You actually want that old thing?”

“I don’t have my own,” Magdalena told him. Markus’s eyebrows crept up.

“You made it all the way to undergrad with no laptop?”

“Not everyone is rich.”

“No shit. That’s why we’re here,” Markus japed, but it was plain that Magdalena didn’t come from money. Her attire was somewhat ill-fitting. Her luggage didn’t weigh anything, and neither did she, by the looks of her. “For real, though, how did you get anything done?”

Magdalena didn’t answer. She shut the laptop and commenced unpacking her suitcase, but there wasn’t a lot to unpack. With nothing else to do, Markus booted up his own computer. “Quiet type, huh?”

The girl produced a annoyed huff from the back of her throat as she moved the presumably dead guy’s clothes aside and hung up her own in the closet.

“Hey, we’re gonna be stuck with each other for a while. I was just trying to get to know you better. Don’t make shit awkward,” Markus muttered.

Magdalena murmured something unintelligible under her breath—probably an insult—but she humored him. “Used the library computers. Checked out some textbooks when I had to be a home.” She practically lived at the city library, though the administrators eventually put a limit on how long unaccompanied children were allowed to be there each day. The bigwigs had decided they didn’t want street urchins ruining the scenery.

“Sounds like a lot of work for… uh… what’s your major?”

“Mechanical engineering and biotech.”

“Oh, a smart kid? I would’ve taken your lunch money back in the day,” Markus kidded. Magdalena glared at him. “Ha. Sorry. Bad joke. I’m a business major.”

The girl gave him a once-over. “Figures.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Magdalena was silent again as she returned her attention to her suitcase. Markus stuck out his lower lip childishly and turned to his laptop. They both heard a pool of water making its way out of the next dorm and flowing through the corridor outside.

“Does that sort of thing happen often?” Magdalena asked.

“You get used to it.”

Chapter II – Spontaneous Expulsion

“And for those of you who have science classes this year, this is Gearwise Hall,” the campus tour guide introduced.

The freshmen looked up at the building’s hypermodern exterior. Someone had to be power washing those walls on the regular. Magdalena saw through the windows that there was even a sculpture of a DNA strand suspended from the rafters. It wasn’t hard to tell that they were in the rich kids’ part of the university. It was either that or mafia territory. She was seeing a lot of bowties and pinstriped suits.

The guide hauled one of the double doors open and ushered everyone inside. “There are a few students making up an exam, so try to be quiet,” he said in a low voice.

The interior was just as blindingly white as the façade. “Here’s the common area,” the guide told them as he led them across the rounded foyer and into an adjoining room. There were a few students sitting at the tables and poring over their books, getting a head start on studying, Magdalena supposed. The room opened into a terrace whose style was much more gothic than the building itself. It must have been there before the hall was built. It actually looked nice, Magdalena thought, but she noticed the students outside casting unpleasant glares at a student wearing a faded, wrinkled t-shirt. A few of them soon stood up and began hassling the kid until he grabbed his things and left.

Maybe Magdalena’s kind wasn’t welcome at this particular spot.

The guide led them past the many lecture halls and up the stairwell at the end of the corridor. “Freshmen usually only have classes on the first floor, and we’re running out of time, so we’re gonna skip the rest of this place. I need to take you guys to Purge Hall.”

The group mumbled various grievances, but the guide shook her his as they reached the second floor. “Bear with me, guys. Everyone has classes in Purge Hall sooner or later, and it’s really important that you don’t get lost in there and wander somewhere off-limits. Really, really important.” He opened the exit to escort the gathering across the bridge and into the adjacent building.

Magdalena didn’t know what she’d expected, but it didn’t look that different from the other buildings around this here. It was a lot emptier, though, and her footsteps echoed conspicuously. In fact, she couldn’t see anybody else except for the tour group. Magdalena peered over the edge of the entresol. The ground floor was vacant as well.

She was startled by the sound of someone’s phone alarm. It was the end of a class period, it seemed, because students began trickling out of the lecture halls.

Most of them didn’t speak to each other at all. The ones that did were murmuring almost imperceptibly.

“First of all,” the guide began, “that is the Head—I mean, President Purge’s office.” He pointed at the imposing double doors at one end of the pathway. The fancily carved redwood stuck out like a sore thumb from the more contemporary architecture. “Don’t even go near it. And don’t go to any of the basement levels, either. If you’re in the elevator and somebody hits a button for a negative floor, just get out and wait for the… next one… uh…”

The guide faltered. There was a dull metallic clank ringing out from somewhere in the distance, but the sound was getting closer. “Don’t block the walkway, guys. Move up to the wall,” the guide urged, herding the troupe aside. The freshmen were puzzled, but they fanned out and stood against the wall, and Magdalena figured out why when as ground trembled ever so slightly.

A man threw the door open on the other end of the entresol and stepped inside. Well, not a man per se. His “skin” was rough and burnished like steel. Two more followed close behind. Magdalena had never seen the bosses in person before, as prolific as they were. She’d thought Markus was a giant, but these things made him look almost shrimpy.

The one at the head of the trio—Mr. Clockturn, it was—made his way towards the Headmaster’s office without so much as a passing glance at the students, even as they stared at him with wide eyes. His crowbar clinked against the floor as he walked and Magdalena could hear the ticking of his innards when he drew near.

The second one—the only woman; it must have been Miss Gearwise—spared them a smirk. Magdalena nearly had to shield her eyes. She blinked dark spots out of her vision. The light was dazzlingly bright when it glinted on the automaton’s gleaming golden exoskeleton.

The last one flashed smiled at the tour group almost affably, to Magdalena’s surprise. He even winked at one of the ladies. That was kind of gross, actually. He’d strolled off while Magdalena was trying to remember how much older he was than the college students, but his coppery luster denoted him as Mr. Cogsworth.

The university belonged to the mob, certainly, but Magdalena hadn’t expected the Headmaster’s underbosses to show up here so brazenly. Magdalena wondered for a moment why law enforcement had quit raiding this place, but she figured the mob had paid the police department off a long time ago. What would the cops do, anyway? Shoot an ironclad robot?

A cluster of students ahead of them scattered as the three approached. One of them had his back turned to the automatons, however, and he evidently didn’t get the memo. Mr. Clockturn hefted his crowbar. Magdalena looked away.

The student was already out cold when he toppled over the railing. Magdalena heard a loud crack. The people on the first floor shrieked. He hadn’t stuck the landing, apparently. The automata tittered as they peered over the barrier and continued into the Headmaster’s dwelling. It was too dark in the chamber for Magdalena to see much when Mr. Clockturn pushed the doors open, but she glimpsed President Purge’s luminous yellow eyes, corners crinkled as if he were smiling.

The tour guide waited until the doors were closed again before he finally resumed speaking. “I apologize you all had to see that. Y-you never know when those guys are gonna show up. Listen, they take it as, um, rudeness when you don’t move for them. Just-”

“They just fucking killed somebody!” one of the freshmen exploded, motioning vehemently at the spot where the student had fallen from.

The guide shushed the dissident. “There’s no need yell!” he said whispered harshly as he glanced at the office uneasily. “Seriously. You don’t want those things to come back out here right now. As I was saying, that kind of thing won’t happen to you as long as you stay out of their way.”

The guide was clearly trying to remain collected, but to no avail. He fidgeted with the lanyard around his neck as he did a silent headcount of the tour group.

“Let’s just move on to the next building. Most of you don’t have courses here this year anyway.”

He hastily steered the tour group through the entrance where the automata had come in from, and the remainder of the outing passed by in a blur.

Markus looked up from his laptop when he heard the dorm door unlock. Magdalena walked in and dropped her backpack next to her desk. It sagged on the floor glumly.

“Fun tour?” her roommate asked. No response, but he was getting used to it quickly.

He put down the beer he’d been nursing. Drinking in the morning? Magdalena didn’t blame him. She couldn’t think of many reasons for people to stay sober around here. “Aw, I’m just messing around. Someone posted the vid already,” Markus told her, gesturing at his screen. A video of the student splattering against the vinyl tiles played on loop.

“Does that sort of thing also happen often?” Magdalena questioned.

Markus scrolled away from the post before speaking. “Guess that depends on what you mean by often.”

Magdalena stared at him.

“Come on. The Darwin Award is a thing everywhere. Don’t look at me like that,” Markus said.

“This is how I always look.”

“Oh.” He perhaps should have figured that out already. Magdalena was wearing that catatonic expression in the murder video as well. “Well. You saw those guys. The bosses, I mean. You’d have to be pretty stupid to stand where they’re walking, right? That’s, like, natural reflection, or some shit.”

“Natural selection.”

“Yeah. That. Whatever.”

Magdalena collapsed onto her bed and let out a sigh. Markus rested his face on his hand as he observed her through lidded eyes. There was a small smile of amusement on his lips. “Don’t tell me you’re already tapped out. You didn’t even know the guy.”

It wasn’t just the impromptu homicide. It was everything. Magdalena watched a roach as it crept down the cracked drywall. “Maybe I should have gone for an online degree. This university is shit.”

Markus drank to that. “This entire city is shit, babe,” he laughed. “I guess that means you thought you were gonna move away for college…?”

The cockroach made it to the window and squeezed through a gap in the frame, scrambling away to freedom.

Magdalena sighed again. “Yeah.”

“No need to give up just yet. I knew a few graduates who scraped up enough cash to leave.”

“I can’t move away. I owe money to the mob.”

“Oh… yeah, nevermind. You’re fucked.”

“Thanks.”

Markus laughed again. He crushed the empty can in his hand and pitched it at the waste basket. “Nah, you’ll be fine. Maybe. You want some advice from a guy who’s had to deal with this place for a while?”

“Shoot.”

His face grew serious. “Worry about yourself. Not morons flying over guardrails and shit-talkers going missing at night,” he warned Magdalena, looking pointedly at his old cotenant’s belongings. He’d said he’d toss them, but it was starting to seem like Magdalena would have to do it. “No one’s gonna cover your ass for you. We’ve all got our own problems going on, you know? And people who stick their noses in other people’s business don’t last that long.”

What reassuring counsel. “I’ll keep it in mind,” Magdalena replied blandly.

The girl rolled over in her bed. Markus’s eyes drifted back to his laptop screen. They didn’t say another word to each other until classes began.

[hollywoodxwhore]

Ours | Chapter 18

Colson x Presley (Original Female Character)

Synopsis: Presley and Colson fell in love accidentally, but they were meant to be. Now that all the obstacles have been removed, they're moving in together in LA. Now, they have all the time in the world for Colson to teach Presley all of the things he knows. This fic is the sequel to Mine, which can be found in my masterlist!

Warnings/Content: A little more angst but it's wrapping up I promise, mentions of suicide, mentions of panic attacks, mentions of not eating due to mental health issues, smut (18+), oral sex (f receiving), desperate sex, col coming in his pants, swearing, squirting, fluffy sweet aftercare

This is the final chapter of Ours (excluding the epilogue but it's super short) and I'm so grateful for everyone's love and feedback for this series. If you don't already know, there will be a third part and I'm so excited to write it. I hope you all love it!

Presley

I can’t believe I lost it that badly. 

I sleep for hours on Colson’s chest. When I wake up, he’s asleep, too, and I study his face, memorizing his features over and over again. The tightness in my chest is not normal. This is not just depression or anxiety. This is something deeper, and that really scares me. 

I wish like hell that it was easy to move past it, but how am I ever supposed to let go of the fact that if I hadn’t left Colson, he would never have put the wheels in motion to kill himself? How can he say it isn’t my fault – how can anyone say that? I know they’d all blame me if Colson had gone through with it. I can see it now – everyone trying to be sensitive at the funeral, but someone would lose it, point their finger at me, and say, “She’s the reason he killed himself!” 

God, I don’t want to have another panic attack. I’m already so weak and exhausted from the first one. My entire body hurts, my head throbbing. I haven’t eaten anything today, nor have I had any water, and I feel like almost every physical need anyone could have is plaguing me right now. 

But I can’t let go of my husband.

My mouth is so dry that I can barely breathe. My stomach twists with nausea, an ironic reaction to hunger, and my bladder is so full that it hurts. But despite all this, despite knowing my water bottle is right there on the table, that a toilet is right around the corner, I can’t get off of Colson. Jesus. Am I going to piss myself lying here because I’m so attached? Get it together, I say to myself, and even though it makes my blood pressure hike, I extricate myself from Colson’s arms. 

After emptying my bladder, I chug down half of my water bottle before taking a breath, and then I drink the rest of it. Colson starts to stir as I drink. He blinks his eyes open and then looks down at himself, eyes widening a little with worry when he doesn’t see me. He snaps his head over and relaxes as soon as he sees me. “Hey,” he rasps sleepily. 

“Hey,” I say, voice small. 

“Did you get some sleep?” he asks. He looks so endearing and adorable right now, his bleached hair all fluffy from sleep, his long eyelashes shadowing tired eyes. 

I nod. “Yeah. I’m starving, though,” I admit.

Guilt crosses Colson’s features for a millisecond. “You haven’t been eating,” he remarks, almost as if he’s just now realizing it himself. With that, he hops off the couch and lifts me into his arms. I can’t help but smile a little, wrapping my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck like a koala bear. 

Colson sets me on the countertop and pecks my lips softly before turning to open the fridge. “What sounds good?” 

I’m weirdly relaxed, despite what happened earlier. I’m not hiding anything from Colson anymore, and that in and of itself is a relief. “Anything,” I say.

Colson nods. “Got it.” 

Colson makes me crispy chicken cutlets, a salad, and garlic mashed potatoes. I’m shocked by how much I’m actually able to eat – two full plates. The food is incredible and I feel so much better after eating. We eat on the floor in the living room with a candle lit, passing a joint back and forth. We talk about everything but the bad shit, and before I know it, Col has me laughing and smiling. For the first time in forever, it finally feels like us again. Our journey is far from over, but what I do know is that I don’t have to do it alone. 

The next day, I sleep in. I wake up to the sound of Colson’s voice. He’s on the phone, clearly trying to be quiet, but I know he’s still in our bedroom because he didn’t want to leave me. 

“Thank you. Alright, bye,” he says, ending the phone call. He glances over at me and when he sees I’m awake, he comes over and crawls back into bed. “Hi, love,” he murmurs, wrapping around me.

“Hey,” I say, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. “Who was that?”

“My psychiatrist,” he says. “We’re going to go see her today and get you some help, okay?” His voice is gentle and so kind, and even though it's a little scary, I relax. 

“You’ll be with me, right?” I ask.

Colson nods, nuzzling into my shoulder. “Of course. I’m not going anywhere.”

We’re quiet for a moment and then I roll over in his arms and look up at him. He wears nothing but a pair of boxer briefs that hug his butt perfectly. I haven’t felt desire since the first day he came home, but all at once, it rushes in so intensely that I feel a little dizzy with it. Using my legs, I pull his thigh between mine. Colson arches a brow but lets me pull him closer.

“Baby?” he questions. He doesn’t need to, though. He knows me well enough to know exactly what I want. His throat bobs as he swallows. “Are you sure?”

I nod, suddenly feeling absolutely desperate for him. “I miss you,” I say quietly. “Just want to be close to you.”

“Don’t do it because you think it’s what I want,” he murmurs, tucking my hair behind my ear. “Just holding you is enough for me.”

Boldly, I slip my hand between our bodies and grip his cock, already hardening in his boxers. I arch a brow, smirking just a little. His words definitely don’t match his body’s reaction. “Well, it’s not enough for me,” I say, and with that, my husband’s eyes darken. I can see the moment when he gives in. 

“Then get on your back,” he says. I do as I’m told and Colson instantly disappears beneath the blankets. I let out a shaky breath in anticipation of what’s coming. Colson slips between my thighs, big hands lifting each one over his shoulder at a time. I fell asleep in a big t-shirt of his and no panties, and when he notices, the breath he lets out is so warm it makes me shiver.

I lift the blankets to look down at him and his eyes lock on mine, his pupils so wide the iris is almost invisible. He brings his gaze to my pussy and bites his lip as he studies me. When his thumb lightly brushes over my clit, my hips twitch and Colson chuckles low. “Sensitive,” he murmurs, and then he presses a kiss to the crease between my thigh and my pussy. I hold a whimper in my throat as my legs start to tremble with anticipation. Just having him between my legs has me so aroused that I’m sure I’m already wet.

Colson presses a tender kiss to my clit, sweet and loving, and the gesture makes my breath catch in my throat. His eyelashes flutter as his eyes close, and the next kiss is open-mouthed and wet and hot, as are the ones that follow. Just his kisses can undo me, can make me so wet that it ruins my panties, and when he kisses between my legs, it heightens the experience tenfold. Sparks fly, electricity zinging through my body at the sensations his talented mouth can bring.

When my husband moans with my pussy in his mouth, my spine arches off the bed and my hands fist the sheets, effectively dropping the blanket. I can't see him anymore so I scramble to push the comforter out of the way. The morning sunlight peeks around the curtains, illuminating his white-blonde hair and eyelashes. He is a devil that looks like an angel when he takes care of me and I don’t think I’ll ever get over the way he affects me.

I gasp when Colson’s hands brace beneath my thighs and shove them up, lifting my lower half off the bed. His dark eyes lock on mine as he moves his tongue lower, swiping over everything before returning to my clit. I tense up, a little surprised. We’ve of course had anal, but he’s never had his mouth anywhere near my ass. I never saw the appeal; why do that when I have a much more sensitive clit right there? But it’s so erotic and almost…forbidden and it takes my breath away. Colson repeats his motions, moaning against me before his tongue lands on my clit and twists around it in circles.

“H-holy fuck,” I choke out, shoulders lifting off the bed in response to the pleasure. My stomach is rock hard with tension, so hard that I’m starting to tremble. Colson can’t stop moaning against my pussy and the vibrations are making me see stars. The room heats and my vision starts to flutter around the edges. I’m practically hyperventilating as he has his way with me, showing me just how perfectly he can use his mouth.

Half of me wants to beg him to put his fingers inside me, but I’m curious to see if he can actually get me to come without putting anything inside of me. If he can do it with just his mouth. As his plush lips close around my swollen clit and suck as his tongue continues to work, my stomach starts to knot up, telling me that, yes, my husband can make me come with just his mouth.

“Cols,” I practically wheeze, grabbing a handful of his hair. “Holy shit, baby, ‘mgonna come.” My words slur together; I’m drunk with pleasure as my pussy starts to clench around nothing. My heart races and I let my head fall onto the pillow as tingles creep up my spine and my stomach ties itself in such a tight knot that it almost hurts. And then, the knot explodes in my belly as I let it all go.

My body moves erratically beneath his mouth, even as his hands hold my hips down. I sob at the pleasure, hips twitching upwards as my clit throbs on his tongue. I’m just starting to come down when Colson comes up, slotting himself between my legs. He presses his clothed cock to my aching clit and grinds forward. I look up at his face and notice how tightly his brow is knitted together. His lips are parted as he pants and the way he ruts against me is so familiar that I reach down and grab his ass to help work him towards his own rapture.

“Fuckfuckfuuuuuck,” he chokes out. “Baby–” I watch his face, reveling in his unabashed pleasure as he comes from nothing other than giving me head and a little bit of grinding. It will never not shock me how I, some girl who was a virgin less than a year ago, can get Machine Gun Kelly, a well-known sex god, to come in his pants. And I love every fucking second of it.

Colson relaxes on top of me, our hearts fluttering against each other, and then he lifts his head to kiss me hard, so hard that my pussy already aches for him again. “I’m not done, I promise,” he breathes. “Just couldn’t help it. Your taste, your sounds, fuck.” His words melt into a moan. “Love you so fuckin’ much.”

“Get on your back,” I say, touching his cheek. Colson’s eyes sparkle. He loves when I ride him and I love it just as much, but I’ve got something else in store for him. I’ve been doing my research, or at least I was before everything went to shit. There’s something I’ve been wanting to try forever and now I finally have that chance.

I drop my shirt to the floor and help him out of his boxer briefs, and for a second, I’m tempted to slip my hand into his boxers, to feel what I did to him. Jesus, Colson has made me filthy. I drop the soiled boxers onto the floor and climb over top of him. There’s still cum on his tip and smeared slightly on his belly, and my eyes darken. I can’t help myself, moving down his body to lick up the leftover spend from his skin. Colson shudders and moans and his cock twitches, already hard again. 

He reaches for me and I come up, but then I turn around. “Holy fuck,” Colson says when he realizes what I’m doing. I smirk as I crawl over his body and position his cock at my entrance. It’s a little difficult to situate at first; I’m so used to the way he fits perfectly when I’m riding him the other way. Reverse cowgirl is more difficult than it looks but I’ll do it for Col. 

With his help, I finally sink down on him, and while it isn’t the most comfortable position for me, I don’t care. Because Colson’s hands have a bruising grip on my hips and he’s already moaning shamelessly behind me. I tip my head back, letting my long hair graze his chest, and he grips onto it, tugging. I moan at the slight roughness and try to move, but it’s tough, until Colson bends his knees, giving me his thighs to use for leverage. 

When I start to grind back and forth, Colson curses loudly. “Th-that’s it, baby, h-holy fuck,” he says shakily. “So good, Pres. so fucking – oh shit – perfect.” 

I love how powerful I feel, unwinding my man the way I am. “Colson,” I moan as pleasure starts to creep in. I won’t be able to come like this, but that’s okay. 

After a few minutes, Colson slows my motions, and I look back at him over my shoulder. He grins at me. “As much as I love this, I want to see your face,” he confesses, and I melt a little as I lift myself off of him and turn around. But instead of letting me ride him, Colson flips our bodies over and settles his weight onto me. With a slow grind of his hips, his cock slides back inside of me until it’s home. His hands slide beneath my ass and squeeze, pulling me closer to him, and with his eyes on mine, he starts fucking me hard.

Pleasure rushes in so fast that I can’t stop the moans bubbling out of me. I can feel myself getting wetter around him as he pounds into me, our skin slapping together. “Colson,” I whimper. “Fuck, baby–”

“Yeah,” Colson grits out, squeezing my ass even harder. “Fuck, I love you. So good to me.” He presses kisses along my collarbone and over my shoulder. My eyes are practically crossed at this point, the pleasure so overwhelming in the best way.

“H-harder,” I manage to choke out, because I know he can go harder. He lets go of my ass and lifts up a little, planting his hands beside my head. He brings his legs up and bends them, sliding them beneath my thighs, and then he starts to fuck me at lightning speed. “Oh god,” I wail, digging my nails into his shoulders as he absolutely pounds into me. I’m going to feel this later and I love every second. 

He keeps up his rapid pace but manages to get a hand between us to play with my clit, and that’s what sends me over the edge. A scream rips from my throat as I come so hard that I swear to god I black out for a second. It’s the best orgasm I’ve had in a long time, and Colson always makes me come hard. With that, Colson flips me over, lifts my hips, and slams back inside me. I scream again, squirting all over his cock and thighs, and Colson growls, “Fuck yes.”

I’m practically drooling on the bed at this point, Colson's hands being the only things keeping my hips up. “I’m close,” he manages. “Fuck, Presley, oh my god–” He thrusts four more times, slamming his hips against my ass, and then he seizes up with a gasp as he buries himself as deep as he can possibly go, painting my insides white. His orgasm triggers one more of my own, and that’s it – my legs give out and I splay on the bed helplessly, unashamedly. 

Colson stays flush against me for a few moments as we both come down, breathing hard and sweating. “Christ. That was fucking amazing,” he says, voice gravelly as he kisses my shoulder.

“Yes it was,” I croak, my walls still fluttering around him. When he pulls out, I can’t help but whine, and instantly, his cum trickles out of me. I shiver at the feeling and Colson moans, sitting back on his heels to watch it happen. He drags two fingers over my pussy and I hiss in overstimulation. 

“Sorry,” he rasps, pulling his hand back. “Shower?”

“Shower,” I say weakly, reaching for him. 

In the shower, Colson is pure love and care and safety. He hums while he washes every inch of my body with loving, gentle touches, and I let him. He washes himself quickly and steps out of the shower first, holding up a warm towel for me. He wraps me up in it and hugs me tightly, pressing a long kiss to the top of my head. He takes his time drying me off, too, looking up at me with love in his eyes. I let myself be cared for; we both know I need it right now. 

When we’re both dry, Colson scoops me up and carries me back to bed. “Your appointment is in about an hour and a half,” he says. “Will you get dressed while I make you something to eat?”

I hesitate. I’m scared of him leaving the room, leaving me alone. His expression softens and he thumbs my cheek. “Let’s both get dressed and go to the kitchen together,” he says. I nod gratefully. I’m sitting on the bed and he’s standing, but I reach for him. He hugs me, wrapping long arms around my body, and I slide mine around his neck, holding him close. “I love you, Presley,” he murmurs. 

“I love you too, Colson,” I mumble against his neck, closing my eyes. After a few moments, I let him go and he smiles softly at me. We both get dressed and head to the kitchen where Colson lifts me onto the countertop and presses a kiss to my nose. I can’t help but giggle and he winks at me as he turns to the fridge for food.

As my husband makes us breakfast, I feel a wave of calmness wash through me. Everything is going to be okay. Colson is going to make sure of that.

Taglist: @triplexdoublex@jaxbreaker@mgklove99xx@jinx-on-mars-19xx@iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker@anonymousme86@whiteleoqueen@feroniakutenpuu@hxllywoodwhxree

[beyondspaceandstars]

Treacherous (17)

Relationship: Druig x Reader Warnings: angst, tiny bit of fluff Summary: Soulmate!AU - Soulmate tattoos are incredibly rare but you’ve never felt really proud to have one. Everyone else around you gushed over it while you found the whole thing ominous and a little inconvenient. Truthfully, you were never really convinced you’d find your other half… That is until a random camping trip leads you to a quaint village run by a dark and brooding man who just so happens to be your soulmate. Stuck in the forest with nothing else to lose, you agree to join his world, his little village, and see if there’s actually love behind the markings. A/N: wow! this chapter is a bit slow/kind of like a filler but when it comes to stories we must close every door we open lmao so i hope you still enjoy it. i promise it will start to pick back up again! also, can you believe I've written over 47k words for this fic?? my last full-fledge fic was just over 40k words so this one....this one has really spiraled out of control! thank you for taking this journey and actually caring -- especially this far into it!

‘Treacherous’ Masterlist | Main Masterlist

You stared at the composed post, and it stared right back at you. It was like your diary had puked on your screen. Everything was out at its full capacity. No summarizing for the authorities and no sugar-coating for the family. 

Were you really going to post this? It held everything and spanned longer than any entry you had ever seen on the forums. 

The "post" button taunted you relentlessly. 

You re-read your opening line for the umpteenth time: "Long time viewer, first time posting…finally." It was short and sweet but buckled the reader in for the ride. That was good, it could be catching. But, then again, what were you trying to do with this post? Were you truly just trying to share your story, or did you want to warn others? Could someone just please listen?

You stared at it for an ungodly amount of time. You wrote it to post it…right? So why were you just sitting there, staring at it like it was a bear about to bite you?

You read and re-read and re-re-read the first few lines over and over again. You skimmed your words, your heart hitching slightly when your eyes caught just a glance of your soulmate’s name. At the last second, you opted to not add too many identifying features, such as names or locations. You would no longer allow your story to be vague, but you also weren’t sure what legal lines you were walking on. 

When you were finished with the edits, you still weren’t sure how you were feeling. It was gone. It was good to go. And you were just procrastinating now. This was meant to be liberating — not tighten the locks. 

Your hand had a mind of its own as it reached for your laptop’s trackpad. Two clicks were all it took. The page refreshed and your now-published post stared back at you. Everything felt normal. Nothing had changed after creating the thread. You had vomited your story onto the web and that was that.  

When nothing immediately happened — no comments, no direct messages — you took a sigh of relief. Maybe no one would ever see it, you thought. It was just therapeutic and you could already feel yourself feel a little lighter. 

Recounting everything had certainly been a heavy task. Every thought and every memory tightens the bond. You hadn’t thought you would ever crave your soulmate, but that was the exact position you had found yourself in when you were deep into writing. You wanted nothing more than to turn back the hands of time. You would’ve had a better approach to it all. You would’ve been more compassionate, more understanding — more open to it all. You had been noticed and loved in a way you had never felt before. And now you could only hope and pray you would get it back. You wished you knew what he was out there doing. You could sense he was safe and alive. That was as good as it got for now.

Sighing, you closed the web browser and slammed your laptop shut.

One Week Later

One short, yet exhausting passed in such a slow but demanding way. Your post on the soulmate forums gained a little but reasonable amount of attention. It wasn’t exactly the top post or putting the soulmate horror stories to shame (even if some of the comments said they were greatly concerned about your story) but it had a following and was regularly featured on the front page. A decent amount of comments gathered and you answered them here and there, mostly trying to assure people you weren’t crazy or lying — a thing that was actually impossible as the forums did have its own simple but effective vetting process. 

Behind those who were either terrified or alarmed by your tale were the genuinely interested ones. The people who wanted to know more and could learn to celebrate the little victories in your soulmate journey. Those kinds of comments were comforting to some degree. Hopelessness and confusion were easy to get lost in, but the little cheers from strangers warmed you. Needless to say, though, it was a mixed bag. 

Besides being consumed in the little online space you had created, a lot of your attention went toward finding where you belong in the real world. You had, in some cheesy way, left the forest a different person. It was beyond silly to any outsider, you understood that, but on the surface, the only consistency was your unemployment status. So much had been lost and answered and finding your footing again was proving to be rough. 

Your parents tip-toed around you a lot and their gazes always avoided the tattoo on your wrist. For their sake, you began wearing a lot more sweaters, but you couldn’t ignore it. Out of sight, out of mind no longer worked on you. 

When you weren’t trying to dodge your parents’ concerned looks, you were spending a lot of time focusing on finding a job. It was the first thing you could think of to turn to as it would’ve been your priority anyway had your the camping trip gone as planned. The only major difference is your boyfriend would’ve been here to help you. He had always been more confident, more sure of everything. You just second-guessed your qualifications and stumbled through interviews. Little seemed to be working and you had to tell yourself to give it time. 

Time. The dangerous, fleeting thing. Time didn’t like when you ignored your soulmate tattoo. Time wasn’t too friendly. Time never lets you forget anything. But it seemed all you had was time. Time to waste away, to job hunt, to just lay in bed and contemplate whatever. 

And contemplating was exactly what you were doing with your time when your mother knocked on your bedroom door. It shocked you, but you faced her. She seemed a bit uneasy when you asked her if everything was okay. 

"Your boy—or, well, I guess ex-boyfriend, now, right?" Your mother sighed and didn’t wait for you to answer her either way. "He’s here. He asked to see you."

"Oh." It was the first word you could think off—and it wasn’t even really a word. It was just a sound. A defeated sound. "Yeah, okay. I’ll see him."

Your mother frowned. "Are you sure?"

You searched for anything that told you no, but you came up empty. This moment felt almost inevitable. A part of you knew that day in the police station would not be the last time you faced him. At least it felt a lot less scary than you had initially anticipated. It was almost like your body, your soul, had given up on him. Like you were just about to let go of the rope.

"I’m sure," you replied. Your mother didn’t say more; just turned around and waltzed back down the hall. You followed obediently. 

You found your ex-boyfriend — you were finally going to start calling him that for your own sanity’s sake — was sitting very comfortably at the dining room table. At the head of the table, sipping on a glass of water. Your mother had very much welcomed him in and you didn’t understand why. You shot her a confused look but she just shrugged and departed toward the apartment balcony where you saw your father sitting. They were going to leave you alone with him. Your heart was suddenly in your throat. 

Your ex barely blinked at you as you took a seat across from him. 

"You’re back," he muttered.

"I’ve been back," you replied. "We had a nice reunion at the police station, remember?"

"Don’t be like that," he snapped. "Given the circumstances, I think I was allowed to be a little upset."

"You weren’t just upset, you were enraged."

Your ex barked out a laugh, making you jump. "Oh, forgive me for being upset about the fact my girlfriend ran away from me to fling herself in the arms of another man."

Your jaw was just about on the floor. "Another man? He isn’t just another man, Eric, he’s my soulmate." You viciously pulled up the sleeves of your sweatshirt. Your soulmate tattoo practically glowed. "Remember this? The little mark you were so eager to dismiss? The thing you swore we could overcome? It doesn’t work like that, and it never would have. It’s more than just a mark. It’s more than just lines on my skin and you know it." You shook your head and sighed. "I never left you on purpose. I—I wouldn’t do that. I never in a million years expected to find my soulmate in the middle of nowhere. It just happened, that’s all. It just happened."

Your ex reeled back at that. You saw a hint of defeat in his eyes, but it was fleeting. 

"You don’t see it from my standpoint," he insisted. "In my eyes, I saw my girlfriend, the woman I loved, run away in a goddamn forest no less, only to find her somehow being taken care of by someone else. And not just taken care of, but doing well."

"But I’m telling you that’s not the whole story—,"

"Yeah, yeah, soulmate, blah, blah, blah" he mumbled and crossed his arms over his chest. "Believe it or not, I am trying to wrap my head around that whole thing. I’ve been doing some research."

"Research?" You didn’t know why, but that admission made you feel some kind of uneasy. But he confirmed you had heard him right with one nod. 

"I found your post."

The absence of genuine worries in your heart suddenly switched at his dangerous but enticing words. "Excuse me?" How did he manage to do that? How deep had his research gone? 

"Don’t act so surprised. Your post has made a bit of buzz on the internet forums." He tapped his fingers on the table. "And it’s not like I didn’t recognize it immediately. You can leave out names but the story stays the same, doesn’t it?"

You weren’t sure why you felt so invaded by his comment. It wasn’t like you didn’t know your post had garnered some attention and you weren’t exactly writing in a diary. It was public and accessible. Anyone could view it, even though those without soulmates didn’t exactly spend time browsing forums. Still, to think your story could stay in its little bubble was foolish. 

You were the one to look away now. "Why are you researching soulmates?"

"Because I need to understand it, I need to understand you," he spat. "Did you leave me because I wasn’t good enough? Or was it really because of that damn mark on your wrist? I just don’t get it yet. I’m a man of faith, but not this kind of faith."

"I’m trying to explain…"

"Well, excuse me if I’m not eager to listen to you, the woman who left me in the dust."

You pulled at the sleeves of your sweatshirt, frustrated. "Why did you come here, Eric?"

He shifted in his seat. "I needed to see you," he replied. "I — We — needed closure."

"I agree." You paused and traced the lines running up and down your dining room table. "You really loved me, even with this mark?" Your brain flickered back to when Druig had made that off-handed observation that night under the stars. You had dismissed it, there was no rhyme or reason for someone to be in love with you, but there was an unmistakable hurt behind his anger.

"Of course I did," he breathed. "And I thought, at the time, you could eventually love me, too."

"I… Well, maybe I—,"

"No." He shook his head adamantly. "No, you didn’t. At least, not like you love him."

You jerked your head up at your ex’s words. "But—"

"It wasn’t a question. You certainly do," he replied. "Whether you meant to or not, your forum post was full of love, even in the most confusing, harrowing moments. That’s not nothing."

You don’t know how he saw it, but he wasn’t too out there in his analysis compared to the comments you had received. His optimistic look was jarring but interesting. 

"I’m sorry I put you through all of this." 

It was the least you could say, but it didn’t even begin to resemble a real apology. You had always been unfair, leading on someone and yourself when fate had been staring you dead in the eyes. The future had certainly seemed impossible, but the impossible happens every day. 

You got too comfortable and you paid the price. 

Your ex shrugged. "Yeah, well, I hope you’re actually happy with him. Where is he anyway? Do I get to come face-to-face with him again?"

You tapped your foot nervously. "He’s away right now."

Your ex let out a humorless laugh. "You turn everyone’s world upside down for some guy who ends up leaving you. Are you sure he’s your soulmate or have I been bamboozled?"

Your heart started pounding in your chest. Someone who had read your post still wasn’t getting it. How could anyone reduce anything to something so simple when everything had proven to be so much bigger?

You sighed, shaking your head. "He… He didn’t leave me. He had something to do, that’s all."

"When’s he coming back?"

You stood from your seat, letting your chair nearly tip over behind you. Your hands curled into fists on the table. You were beyond over the charades, the teasing, whatever this shit was.

"Are you done yet?" You spat. "Have you gotten the closure you wanted?"

Your ex rose from his chair calmly, cool and collected, like he hadn’t started a firestorm. Like he wasn’t the first one upset. To him, this was all on you apparently. You weren’t sure anymore how you had given this man the time of day. You’d had an entire relationship that now sat crumbled in some abyss and this was what lay in its ruins? Bitterness. Annoyance. Misunderstandings. He had never gotten you and never well and you had entertained it for long enough.

Despite the anger rumbling in you, all your ex replied with was: "Good luck, honey." He was gone nearly as fast as he appeared. 

The front door of the apartment slammed and almost as if on cue, your parents re-entered from the balcony. They stood in the living room, watching, observing.

"Were you guys eavesdropping that whole time?" You asked, breaking the uneasy silence before it truly began.

Your mother cleared her throat. "We just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Well, I’m fine," you muttered. "Everything's fine." You marched back to your bedroom before anyone could make any more protests, toss more questions your way, or — god forbid — throw accusations. 

You re-found your comfort in your bedroom. Door shut, world turned away. The only thing you could sense anymore was the bond. It hadn’t gone dormant, not since that night you swore you felt Druig. It came and went, but had yet to vanish. 

It pounded in your chest, in your gut, in your brain. As you worried about being apart, it did, too, and you hated it. All you needed was for whatever he and others needed to do, they did it fast, and for all of humanity to not vanish. Too much was unfinished here. It was nearly comical how you had craved normalcy and now found it punishing. 

Exhausted for the day, you crawled into bed, despite dusk just barely hitting the city. You turned toward the wall, a familiar, comforting position. That feeling in you began getting stronger, which wasn’t too odd when you relaxed your brain, but something about this was erratic. If you weren’t in your bedroom, you would’ve sworn Druig was standing beside you. Or maybe it was in the back of your brain. 

And that was when something muttered in your brain, ever so faintly through the chaotic noise. It was soft but recognizable. You heard it and didn’t hear it, it didn’t come to you as words simply would. But there was no room for mistaking it.

"I miss you."