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#I have literally never had a jack break on me like this this is so wild
the-acid-pear · 3 months
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Honestly the best part about True Neutral Jack to me is the fact he... doesn't even really care for the money. Sure he cares about the business growing and expanding but like, in his personal life? He's not doing shit with it for what we see. Like he's not this capitalist sigma grinder type with big dreams or goals like owning a mansion or some shit. Like im sure even if he was a millonaire he'd still be wearing the same suit and living in the same house and likely using the same cheap paint. He just needed a hobbie to run from the skeletons in his closet.
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squisheebugdoodles · 2 months
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Okay Here Is The Problem: everything costs money and yet money is something that i just literally never have. solution? kill the idea of money so that nothing costs anything Please. i'm so tired
#despite making more money w/ my commissions than ever before this year#i am still. not able to save up literally even one (1) single penny of it bc of bills#i have to make like 600 every month just to break even at like 5 dollars in my acct#please i am so fucking tired#i want to get myself things and do shit#i want to buy things for archie and jack's dog and for the house so that things are better for all of us#i want to be able to afford snacks more than once every three months like if i maybe want a bag of chips#instead of saving up for three months and going 'yeah okay 5 dollars for a normal sized bag of chips is finally worth it' ?????????????????#why the fuck are chips so expensive that is potatoes and spices and like all of it is automated hello?? what are we fucking paying for?????#ANYWAYS.#i am just fucking. Tired#due to recent events I was like#'okay how much are dog treadmills.... oh. i see. i will never be able to afford that even after three years saving. got it'#there are five hundred fundraisers on my dash (BARELY hyperbole) every single day and everybody needs help#so i COMPLETELY get people not having a ton of disposable funds this isn't me complaining about that i'm just.#i wish that i sometimes had money so that i could MAYBE save anything up or y'know. have ANYTHING to show for it#bc right now i am working full time at this job (commission/freelance artist and adopt maker etc) and making like maybe 4 dollars an hour#which is great bc when i started i was only getting about $0.11 an hour but like. that's still not. Good. For all the time i put into it#but due to circumstances and situations this is about all i'm physically and mentally able to do here and i LIKE doing commission but it's#not really. getting me anywhere and i just want to afford things finally.#i'm 27 and everything i own fits in one room and almost all of it was gifted to me for free bc i couldn't afford to get it on my own#delete later i'm just so tired man
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jorvikzelda · 3 months
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adding this to the list of Severely fucking stupid absrad deaths
BUT!! (under cut so as to not Clog)
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we fucking got there in the end baby
(did a couple tries for radiant, then was Swept Away by the Migraine. We’ll get there.)
#z talks#hk#hollow knight#uhhhh. yeah i sat and played for like 6 hours (with a lunch break). relevant is also that i Slept for 6 hours (max).#and the whole day i had a headache sneaking up on me and i was like. Nooooo it’d just a tension headache I don’t have any migraine symptoms#(voice of guy who’s stubbornly ignoring their light and sound sensitivity to keep fighting absrad)#And then eventually it. Got so bad i couldnt focus on the game anymore. And i was like. Ok thats it no more game.#And then went to pick up a package (literal 300m walk) Both bc it was the last day to pick it up And to be like ok. If this is a tension -#- headache itll get Better. If it’s a migraine itll get Worse.#I’m fine the walk THERE. But then about halfway home it’s fucking Go Time for the migraine lmfaoooooo#(it was also Hot. and Sunny.)#by the time i got home i was like a solid. 9. on the uh. 1-10 pain scale. GREAT.#anyway then i took my prescription sumatriptan BELOVED and it got better within the hour and now im down to like a . 1-2#which is so insanely good like. that never happens to me even when i DONT have a migraine. LMAO#anyway. this has been the fucking. Daily ted talk about my chronic migraine#dont worry a 9 isnt. Well it is a lot. But it’s not NEW .#happens occasionally#it hurts a Fucking Lot#i didnt even clock it as a 9 at first i was like. god… why would an 8 hurt this bad…#and then i iced my head for 15 minutes and it got better and i could think better and was like. wait no THIS is the 8. THAT was a NINE#im just glad i have fucking medication for it now#before i had to survive on PARACETAMOL. didnt do jack shit#had i not had the sumatriptan i Would still be in that much pain and probably writhing in bed unable to sleep lmfao#unmedicated chronic migraine Not Fun. do not try at home.
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sysig · 1 year
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Looney Tunes-ass setup
#Of all the ways for my laptop to break... I did not expect Only my left ear in the headphone jack to go#USBs? Working fine. Disc Drive? Ain't no thing. SD Card reader? Gotcha.#Fucking uhhhhhhh Left-Ear Headphones?? From the same Headphone Jack????? Sorry???????#Why only the left?? Like if both broke I'd just be like Oh Okay the jack is broken I can understand that#Or if it was the headphones themselves I'd be like Oh Okay some of the wires got loose since they're in separate lines#But then it happened on my Good Headphones that I Just Bought that only have the One Cord for both ear pieces and I Became Suspicious#I have literally never had a jack break on me like this this is so wild#Luckily I had this spare USB volume control which is Not my favourite for several reasons lol#Initially when I bought it I was interested because I thought it was a) a splitter or b) in-line volume control#It is neither! It's basically a plug-and-play volume button#For...in case.....you don't.........have? a volume button? on your device? The horrors I would not buy a device like that in the first place#Everything is a tactile button for me thank you#And also you can plug in a mic but I have a separate USB mic that I like better so lol no on that one#So it was useless! Until....#It's still a bit scuffed it's slightly bass-boosted in a crunchy way which is Not my favourite :/ I like smooth bass-boosting thank you#That's the whole reason I bought these headphones!#It'll do in a pinch until I can ask around about it#I've been meaning to go to a repair shop for uhh year or so? Maybe more? One more push in that direction
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foldingfittedsheets · 7 months
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Since everyone seems to love my sex shop stories, here’s another one.
Phone calls were literally a game for us. Not all phone calls, but there was a specific brand of call where guys would creep on us. 90% of the workforce at the sex shops was women. So we’d get dudes calling jacking off or trying to get their jollies from us.
The game: make them hang up. We could have hung up. On a few occasions I did, but for the most part we made a sport out of getting creeps to go flaccid. It really depended on a caller.
You couldn’t just go in for belittling them straight off- some guys wanted that. You had to tailor your strategy to the perv. Overall it was pretty fun and it turned an aspect of the job that could’ve become a major bummer into a fun sport. We’d get excited when the phones rang.
So one day the phone rings. I pick up and it was very clearly a young teen who was putting on a deep voice. I was utterly delighted, I’d never had a crank call before. He said, “I have a dildo emergency! Can you deliver 5 boxes of dildos to my home?!”
It took everything in me not to crack in that moment. It was so funny. It was like three kids had walked through the door in a trench coat and the phrase “dildo emergency” was one of the funniest things I’d ever heard.
But I kept it together. In smooth customer service tones I replied, “Oh, I’m sorry to hear you’re having an emergency, but due to the nature of our product we do require people to come pick it up themselves.”
The caller audibly deflated. Some of the deep voice he was putting on bled away when he said plaintively, “But it’s an emergency…”
“I’m sorry, sir, rules are rules.”
He hung up. I burst out laughing and told my coworker what had happened. She said, “I will buy you lunch if you call back and pretend you can deliver something.”
This sounded like an all around win for me, and the kid hadn’t used anything to block his number. So I called back.
“Hello!” This was before caller ID was common for home phones and so he picked up in his totally normal voice, several octaves higher than before.
“Hello, I’m calling regarding your dildo emergency?”
“Oh! Hem hem,” he coughed, getting his voice back into character for me. “Yes! The emergency!”
“Well I’ve spoken to my manager and it’s your lucky day. We’ll be able to make a delivery after all. Five boxes you said? We can swing it by later, we’ll just need your name, address, and credit card number.”
He was thrown by needing to provide info and was silent for a moment then said, “Well how much is it for five boxes?”
“About five hundred dollars, sir.”
He slipped out of his character voice to exclaim, “Five hundred dollars?! What kind of dildos are they?!”
“Just standard six inches with balls, sir.”
This was his breaking point. He started wheezing with laughter trying to repeat the phrase “six inches with balls” incoherently.
“So your address and card info?”
He hung up and I broke down laughing too. We both got a kick out of it, and I won the game twice in one day.
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everythingne · 24 days
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unbothered - op81
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oscar's longtime girlfriend is a ballroom dancer. fans don't like that she has to dance with other people. oscar could not give a shit what people say.
ballroom dancer!reader x oscar piastri // fc: parley and natalie
requested by @starlightdelrey (thank you darling!)
warnings/notes: rumors of cheating (no one is cheating), i know nothing about ballroom dancing other than it looks so fucking cool so take this mwah
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liked by oscarpiastri, ronaniliano, hattipiastri, and others...
yourusername: thanks to all who supported us at the US National Dancesport Championships! we may not have gotten a trophy this weekend, but any weekend is good when I'm dancing with my bestie @ ronaniliano <3 (FINALLY!!! now that his ankle is no longer sprained!)
ronaniliano: in the words of my king matthew lillard: "i always come back"
⤷ yourusername: u wanna rewatch that with some post-comp ramen?
⤷ ronaniliano: yes girl lets go
⤷ user: ronan and yn's friendshippp omg
user1: congrats! welcome back to my favorite duo <3
oscarpiastri: ❤️
⤷ yourusername: omg u actually commented?
⤷ oscarpiastri: my mom told me i had to
⤷ yourusername: @ nicolepiastri have i ever said how much i love you?
⤷ nicolepiastri: yes! hundreds of times! but i never mind hearing it again from you !
hattiepiastri: how much to do a txt routine.
⤷ yourusername: i cant perform it but ill bribe ronan into making one for u
⤷ hattiepiastri: as payment, next time ur in aus ill pay for hungry jacks
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liked by oscarpiastri, michealchen, ronaniliano, and others...
yourusername: nom nom nom >:) eating some gold this weekend at @ ohiostarball ! shout out to @ michealchen for the dress this weekend, i felt like a little princesss !!
michealchen: thanks for making my designs shine!
ronaniliano: the prettiest princess on the dancefloor
⤷ yourusername: awe u make me blush :)
⤷ user: uhm... flirting?? on main??
hattiepiastri: lets FUCKING GOOO!!!!!
user1: the way ronan looks at yn omg
⤷ user2: how are they not dating
⤷ user3: no they have to be
⤷ user4: but yn literally has a whole ass boyfriend of six years?
⤷ user1: guys chill they're friends ?? yn has said this before.
oscarpiastri: ❤️
⤷ user5: bro STAND UP. USE UR EYES
⤷ user1: stop being a fucking freak dude
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liked by hattiepiastri, ronaniliano, oscarpiastri, and others...
yourusername: big hugs for such a big finish! double gold this weekend! thank u @ ronaniliano for everything <3
comments have been disabled for this post!
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liked by landonorris, yourusername, logansargeant, and more...
oscarpiastri: she only cheats at chess (by kissing me and switching our pieces)
tagged: yourusername
comments have been limited!
landonorris: okay save some dignity here man
⤷ oscarpiastri: sorry i have the urge to flex my very awesome world champion ballroom dancer girlfriend who wins almost every event and people should respect her more and not be weird
⤷ landonorris: ur a simp
⤷ oscarpiastri: date someone and then talk to me ab being a simp
logansargeant: you can let go of her i promise she isn't going anywhere
ronanilliano: ugh u two are just perfect its unfair
carlossainz: you certainly have a way of shutting down rumors
hattiepiastri: if you guys ever break up true love is NOT real
yourusername: you're a very easy man to distract :)!
⤷ oscarpiastri: you're doing so right now
⤷ yourusername: yeah get off ur phone loser and pay attention to me :) <3
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barbies1shots · 2 months
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I love the anon that asked for height & size difference for AOT
Can we get one with (your fav) but MHA
Love your writing 💕
hi anon! ofc, and thank you so much for reading<3
this is actually gender neutral, and chubby pups accepted!
☆- exhibitionism(in the classroom), size difference, praise, established relationship, overstim, free use, featuring AIZAWA SHOUTA♡
Aizawa Shouta has never been a soft man. always stern and nonchalant. you, bringing him food during his office hours or during his lunch break always turns in the wrong direction. since he is the Underground Pro hero, always working day in day night. teaching his class in the day while fighting ruthlessly at night, he seems to have no time to himself. but he always seems to make time to fuck you inside and out..
he sat lazily in his classroom chair with his head tilted back, and you were sitting on top of him, straddling him as you shifted on his thick thighs. your knees dug into his muscles, and your hands clutched the clothing covering his upper body.
you were just trembling like a small pup. just turns out you just can't take him by yourself:( needing help from him.
you had just the tip nudged into your gummy hole and he grunted, a low sound coming from his throat and he gripped your pudgy hips. his veins bulging through his skin.
"Either you do it right, or dont do it at all."
he grunted and began to steadily push your hips down. he just kept going as your pleasure filled whines grew louder. omg, since he is just so big, it just feels like he's in your guts:<
you cry out sharply when he planted his feet flat on the ground and lifted your body weight, only to let gravity have its way and drop you back down on his lap. he bucked into you, his black hair falling over his shoulders as he groanes from the tightness- or the warmness, or even the softness of your cunt.
he shut out your cries, even when you tried to push his arms away from coming to wrap around you to jack hammer his hips into yours. he shut out your begs that he was 'too good!' or 'too big, m' cant do it anymore!'
:((
he mumbled about how good you feel, that you were just amazing to him and that you couldn't get enough. that he just wanted more and more from your spent body. dragging orgasm and orgasm from your trembling body.
the way he dragged his thick tip from the rim of your hole to punching your g-spot had literal tears cascading down your flushed cheeks. his arms wrapped around your waist, and they were just so big while he had you pinned to his sculptured chest.
lifting you up before dropping you back down to meet the buck of his hips. the round getting his chair sopping wet and his pushed down pants soaked in jucies and liquids.
Aizawa needed to get all his stress and frustration out, and he needed to use you. he just needed you.
he needed the way you cared for him, the way you were concerned over him. he needed your reassurance. he needs your mind, soul, and body.
and now, your fucked out brain, sopping hole and a drooling, dumb mess on his shoulder? what more could Aizawa Shouta ask for?
AHHHH!! Aizawa is my literal husband. thank you for the ask, anon!<3
also, i want mutals, add me guys, im not scary:(
@aizawasbarb
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yelsapo · 4 months
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I honestly think this episode was meant to be confusing in a sort of Alice-in-Wonderland-ish way, where the loose ends won't/aren't meant to be tied up later. It's confusing and random, but that's the point.
Kate tells Ruby, "It's what we all do. We see something inexplicable and invent the rules to make it work."
And I think that might be exactly what Ruby does. Stick with me PLEASE
The premise of the episode opens with a superstition: a fairy circle. Something surrounded by stories and myths that don't necessarily make sense, and yet many people form their entire lifestyles around these belief systems because they explain the unexplainable for them.
The woman that follows Ruby appears to chase people away from her, or convince them to abandon her, which is clearly a common theme within Ruby as a character. She's afraid of being abandoned.
Typically breaking a superstition means that you're going to suffer some sort of misfortune as a result, right? If you were to break a superstition that you believed in (ie. ruining a fairy circle), what misfortune would you fear most happening to you? For Ruby, it probably centers around her fear of abandonment.
We know that Ruby is supernatural in some way. She's definitely not a typical human. She can make it snow on command? Who's to say that the "silly little explanations" that she makes up to make sense of her unknown don't ACTUALLY come to fruition. What if she has the power to do that?
So, let start from the beginning. Ruby and the Doctor break a fairy circle, an action which culturally means bad luck. In Ruby's mind, her worst luck would be to be abandoned by everyone, and to never find her birth mother in the end. And that's exactly what happens.
Roger Ap William is a name mentioned by the Doctor in the first couple of minutes of 73 yards. The only information that is given is that he was evil, welsh, and almost brought the world to nuclear destruction. That's all Ruby knows. Mad Jack appears at first to be some arbitrary name Ruby reads on a piece of paper, but is later revealed to literally be Roger Ap William? How coincidental is that? I don't think that Roger and Mad Jack are actually the same person. In fact, Mad Jack probably WAS just someone's dog. They were just two names that Ruby had recently heard, and then drew an imaginary line between. To further the point, Roger is SUCH a caricature. His only three personality traits are quite literally evil, welsh, and likes nukes, which is all the Ruby knew about him.
Throughout the episode Ruby finds herself in a situation that doesn't make sense, so she comes up with her own explanations to make them make sense. She invents her own rules and her own mission. She comes up with a string of tasks that aren't logical to us, but it's the explanation she has come up with given the information that she had. She's convinced herself that it makes sense. She starts to form her lifestyle around a belief system that she created because it explains the supernatural she is experiencing.
And because of whatever supernatural abilities surround her, she's actually making her percepetion of reality the REAL reality.
(Edit: Not to mention that superstitions have been a common theme this season (ie. 14 invoking that salt superstition in WBY kicked off this season's entire plot) AND WBY is the first case in which we see Susan Twist as well...
It all leads back to that moment.)
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radiance1 · 1 year
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Gimmie a Danny and Damian twins au, but not one where they're all gushy gushy and huggy huggy about the fact that they're reunited.
I want one, where they HATE and try to KILL EACH OTHER. Where they're extremely fucked up in their relationship with one another, but can't kill the other because Taila hoped that they could get along.
They spew poison at each other, inflict pain on each other as easy as BREATHING and would leave the other while heavily injured while saying that they could take care of themselves.
I want them to be near mortal-enemies wrapped up in the bodies of two highly-competent and powerful 14 year olds who cannot give a fuck about each other, has a fleeting thought of killing the other on the best of days but doesn't because of their dear mommy Taila.
Then force them to interact with each other after a long period of separation. I don't give a flying FUCK how you manage to do it, perhaps Danny has to run because his parents vivisected him, perhaps the Nasty Burger explosion couldn't be reversed because Clockwork said no and Danny is torn or perhaps Vlad brings him to Gotham for a gala (either redeemed or not redeemed Vlad), etc, etc.
Force these two children who fucking HATE each other under the same roof, make them interact, make them watch each other interact and make comments about it. Maybe even make an unstable Danny try and KILL Damian, but is stopped by the batfam, or maybe make it that Danny can't even bring himself to kill Damian because he's (discounting Talia) the only family he has left.
Maybe even (if you go the Nasty Burger/Dead Fenton fam au) make Danny hate Bruce Wayne's fucking GUTS because this man is trying to replace his dead father (even though Bruce IS his biological father) and hates him even MORE because he looks so similar to Jack's face that he's literally torn whenever he sees him. Make it that he never stays in the same room as Bruce whenever he's not in mask, make it that he tells Bruce TO HIS FACE that he hates the man for trying to replace his dead FUCKING dad and that he will NEVER accept him as one, biologically related or not.
Maybe even make him not like the batfam either just for the fact that they associate with both Bruce and Damian.
(I just remembered about that one post I saw, but BOY is this ramble gonna get even WORSE for dear old Danny. Though this part isn't really necessary could just read the on top bit lol)
Maybe they even find a way to take away his ghost side, and Bruce (With or without Talia) say that it's for the best for him, and Danny? Danny just fucking BREAKS. DOWN. He's full-on crying and screaming at Bruce and maybe has to be held back by the other batkids or not, or maybe he's just fulling on trying to hit Bruce and Bruce either dodges or just takes it.
Saying how fucking DARE he take away his ghost side, that was apart of him and he had NO FUCKING RIGHT to take away something so precious from him. Then Bruce could say that he doesn't need powers, he could be fully if not even more capable as a human.
And Danny just goes "You don't even get it, do you?" And Danny just cries harder because technically that was one the LAST things linking him to his parents. His DEAD parents. Sure, the accident was his fault, but phantom was created because of their portal, in their lab, in their basement.
Even worse if the reveal went RIGHT and they starting accepting how he was half ghost and trying to change their views on ghosts as a whole, only to die. Then, for some guy to just, take away something like that from him?
Maybe Danny would even say that, rip into him about how that was one of the only things linking him to his parents and even if it wasn't he didn't have the fucking right to decide what to do with HIS body.
"You never had to fucking worry about your parents not accepting you, I did. They still loved me regardless, they tried to change for me. But you wouldn't even know what that feels like, would you, you stupid fucking rich boy."
[idk why I typed that part out but just role with it.]
Maybe Bruce tries to sympathize with Danny about his parents, but Danny just doesn't have any fucks left to give about Bruce's life, or anyone else life in Bruce's life at all and just shuts it down or steamrolls over it. At the end of it all Danny is just a crying, shivering wreck and stares down Bruce with eyes full of HATE that tells Bruce one step closer, and he would KILL him.
Maybe then Damian (Either walks in or was there the entire time.) insults Danny over his weakness and depending on his ghost form or something, and Danny just sees fucking RED and jumps on him. No care that he's no longer half ghost, so that he means he could die more easily, no care to anyone else in that room, no care that Talia wanted both of them to get along and not kill each other.
He tries to kill Damian.
He fails miserably, of course, but he still tries. Then tries again and a fucking gain.
Then after all that he just, doesn't come out of his room, or tries to escape and leave Gotham every chance he gets. He never gets far, but he keeps trying, and he never opens up to anyone in the batfam, not even Alfred.
He's just a kid who lost everything he worked so hard for, everything he tried to hide from his biological mother and her assassin league who tried to keep whatever he had left. Now that kid is fueled by nothing but pure, revolting hatred for the people who took even that from him.
Basically like Dark Danny, but way more powerless and fully human.
[Okay that's enough of me rambling.]
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chukys-mouthguard · 3 months
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23. “Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
luke with his gf
Prompt: “Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
Note: i feel like Luke is so hard for me to read that i had to do research before writing this 😂 like Jack and Quinn give off energy and vibes that are easy for me to read, Luke is literally the opposite, so hopefully i did him justice for my first time writing with him
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“Oh my gosh, what a day!”
With a sigh you fell back onto the couch, Luke softly chuckling at you as he unpacked the takeout you’d ordered from your favorite Chinese restaurant.
“Yeah, it was really fun. Can’t wait to see how many hearts break when photos end up online of Jack and his girlfriend out there.”
Joining Luke in the kitchen you searched for your takeout container while he handed you a plate. “Yeah, Jack is gonna be Mr. Heartbreaker for a few days. The girls will get over it I’m sure.”
The two of you taking your food over to the living room, this becoming a routine you’d shared in your relationship for a few months now. Every couple weeks you’d order takeout, trying to be mindful of both of your diets, though Luke’s claims it should be a weekly tradition. The two of you’d sit on the floor around the coffee table and talk for hours while eating dinner.
It was one thing you’d never gotten tired of. Loving the opportunity to enjoy the moments together just the two of you. Always having stories to talk about, especially when Jack and Luke were on the same team. He took every chance to chirp his brother he could.
“Did you see Lazar at family skate today?”
Immediately smiling as you thought back to Lazar on the ice with his wife and son, your heart melting at the thought of it. “Yes, oh my god he is so freaking cute. And Curtis seemed just over the moon getting to share that moment with him.”
Luke nodded as he dragged his fork through his food.
“It sort of makes me excited for the day that I’ll have that, well I mean, we I guess. Not just me.”
Your cheek flushing red at his words, leaving you speechless as he looked away embarrassed. “What??”
He nervously asked as you’d yet to say anything back to him.
“Just when I think you couldn’t make me go even weaker in the knees, you go and say stuff like that. Do you want me to collapse? Maybe melt into a puddle too while I’m at it?”
Luke just smiling as his cheeks grew red. He wasn’t the type to be overly emotional, leaving that role to you. But he’d felt comfortable enough to say what was on his mind.
He be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about the future with you, though only having been together a few years, he felt like it had been your whole lives. And judging by the blush on your cheeks and the smile on your face, it seemed like you weren’t opposed to the idea.
“Well, I don’t know. Just seeing guys have moments like that, can’t help but think about it happening to me you know?”
Nodding your head you couldn’t stop smiling, loving this side of Luke where he wasn’t afraid to be open and honest. Letting his guard down a bit and showing some emotion.
Moving to his side you curled up under his arm, wrapping your arms around him as he offered you a bite of his food.
“I love the idea of us having a moment like that one day.” Tilting your head up you gave him a kiss on the cheek as he smiled. “You, me, and our little girl skating around the ice.”
“Oh, you were thinking girl? Interesting, I thought boy.”
Luke shrugged as he stood up, walking to take the empty food containers to the kitchen.
“Well, looks like we are just gonna have to try for one of each then huh?”
Your eyes going wide as you stared at him, Luke just laughing while he cleaned up. “One of each? Oh my gosh, we don’t even have one kid yet and you’re already talking about multiple?”
Luke smirked at you from behind the door of the fridge as he put away the leftovers, enjoying how flustered the conversation had made you.
“It’s never too early to get started, or at least get some practice!”
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crazy-only · 3 months
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nsfw alphabet oscar piastri edition !
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a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
sweet baby is probably making sure you came, getting in between your legs and licking you clean like the tease he is before cleaning you up properly with a towel and getting you your favorite drink. he jokes around a lot but does not play when it comes to caring for you.
b = body part (favorite body part on themselves, as well as their partner’s)
oscar is OBSESSED with your fucking tits. oh my god you cannot convince me otherwise. every time he sees your rack on display in a low-cut shirt (regardless of your size) he gets turned on. it’s gotten to the point where he has to take a “bathroom break” during family dinners because he just can’t believe you’re his.
once you guys got more comfortable during sex, he got you to ride his face, and oh my god oscar was so happy in that moment. after that, he made sure at least weekly you were nearly suffocating him with your sweet pussy, so, long story short, he likes his nose because you also like it! ≥︺‿︺≤
c = cum (anything to do with cum)
baby cums so much you get worried you might get knocked up sometimes (even though you’re on the pill). if you haven’t cum yet, his stringy ropes will definitely hit all the right spots, leaving you in a moaning mess.
sometimes he cums on your belly and licks it off you when you’re insecure that day, just to show you how much he worships your body.
oscar also loves making you taste your own cum after fingering you slowly for an hour. you just taste so good! he can’t help it. (>‿◠)
d = dirty secret (dirty secret of theirs!)
oscar secretly wants to fuck you while you’re tied up. he seems like the type to joke around and make sarcastic remarks during sex, but deep down he’s fucking sadistic. he wants to see how helpless you can get under his hands.
e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
yes. just yes.
haha just kidding. i actually don’t think he’s that experienced, just because of the fact he’s probably been focused on racing his whole life and never really had a chance to hook up with people. naturally, his body count is low.
that being said, though, he’s not scared at all to try new things with you. oscar has no shame when it comes to making you guys feel good—so don’t worry about experience!
f = favorite position (cowgirl, missionary, etc.)
oscar loves fucking you face to face, with your hands held above your head in his left hand and his other hand fondling your tits. he’s big on seeing your reactions, and making you face him while yours contorts with pleasure and pain.
g = goofy (are they serious or more humorous in the moment?)
oscar’s actually pretty scary when it comes to freaky time. you love to tease him just to be a brat, but when your man finally snaps, oscar can’t help it but show you who’s in control. he loves a good laugh, and sometimes when you guys are having soft sex, it’s not rare to hear giggling, but in all other occasions, your man is taming you.
h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes?)
this man could care less about the hair situation down there. he shaves and whatnot so it’s never uncomfortable for him while racing, but he knows you like it when there’s a happy trail for you to get entranced in. he also loves forcing you down his cock so your nose is surrounded by his pubes. it makes him so much harder.
i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
oh my god this man literally asked you to be his girlfriend with a whole garden of candles and roses. he plays it off like these romantic moments are just to get you flustered, but he truly does enjoy making a good cute memory with you and learning more about you.
j = jack off (masturbation head canon)
oscar doesn’t have much time for getting himself off. (◞‸◟) regardless of his horniness level, most nights, he just falls right to sleep. when he does have a spare minute, though, he jacks off to videos of you moaning his name. he imagines it were your fingers wrapped around himself.
k = kink (one or more of their kinks)
like mentioned previously, oscar loves to tie your ass up, making you whimper and cum several times over before he even thinks about himself.
other than rigging, oscar loves some good food play, like eating whipped cream or something sweet from your tits until you beg for his dick.
l = location (favorite place to have sex!)
he is utterly addicted to fucking you in the car. he loves it when you think you’re the boss and drive him around town. even after you scraped another car trying to park (totally the other car’s fault), he still ate you out, reassuring you that he can afford to fix a little mistake like yours.
extra points if he gets you to suck his dick while he drives. he saw you cum in your panties one time just from sucking him off, and he found it really hot, but he knows you’d be so embarrassed if he ever found out, so he never said anything about it.
m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
absolutely anything to do with your tits turns him on. if you’re in the pool or it’s cold and your nipples become prominent—boom! he’s bricked up. if you spill something on your shirt and you try to clean it up with a napkin—you guessed it! man’s bricked up!
he also fucking loves it when you’re a brat, even though it seems otherwise. when you stick your tongue out at him, all he can think about is that tongue getting forced down your throat by his dick. it’s obvious because his cheeks turn red.
n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn off’s)
oscar doesn’t fuck with blood play or any cutting of the skin for that matter. it’s inconvenient as he trains daily and can’t afford injuries.
he also doesn’t really enjoy being dommed for a whole week. he’s got to have at least 60% control in the bedroom for him to be happy.
o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
oscar loves driving you insane with his tongue on your pussy, eating you out how he knows you like it, but he honestly loves it more when you suck him off. it’s just a power thing, and you don’t complain because it also turns you on. ( ^ω^)
he doesn’t mind how good or bad you are at blowjobs. as long as you’re putting in the effort, this man is bound to cum.
p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
oscar leans more on the slow side just because he wants to torture you and show you who’s in control. every now and then when you’ve proven your worth he’ll go fast and rough the way you like it, because, at the end of the day, he’s whipped for you.
q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
oh my god i just know oscar has a quickie before every race to calm his nerves down. if he doesn’t listen to music beforehand he has to chill out in some other way, no? usually he prefers you sucking his dick off in the family bathroom before hopping in the f1 car, but when he doesn’t have you, he makes due with his hands >﹏< (though he swears he preforms better after a blowjob from you).
r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
your man loves risking being caught while fucking you because he simply doesn’t give a fuck. he personally thinks the chance of getting caught makes the whole situation hotter, and loves covering your moans with wet kisses.
to experiment with non-vanilla type sex, he’s more than happy to do so. he really doesn’t mind trying new things, because baby knows what to fall back on if you’re not getting the pleasure you deserve. (>‿◠)
s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
oscar can go for as long as you need. when he has the time, he loves to overstimulate you until you’re near passing out. all of the training he’s done is more than enough to fuck you hard like you want it!
t = toys (do they own toys and use them? on a partner or on themselves?)
due to his busy schedule, baby has a toy that he knows will get him off quick and take away the horniness for at least a few hours. for himself, he’s never really adventured into the world of sex toys, preferring his hands or basic toy.
when he met you, though, he started purchasing all sorts of gadgets just to drive you crazy. his favorite one to use on you is the vibrator with a suction cup that attaches to the ground. he makes you ride it and cum all over it, stroking himself at the erotic scene before fucking you hard with his own dick, making you say that his is better.
u = unfair (how much they like to tease)
like mentioned previously, oscar teases you endlessly, mainly just to show you who’s the boss. you’re just so cute under his lengthy fingers; who wouldn’t tease you a bit?
v = volume (how loud are they? what sounds do they make? etc.)
oh god oscar lets it all out when he’s fucking your pussy. after a day of dealing with the press and holding in all of the rude comebacks he could’ve made to the reporters, oscar needs to let off his steam vocally. he groans and tells you dirty things, calling you his slut, not bothering to keep his volume down for the neighboring hotel rooms. frankly, he finds it a bit funny for them to have to hear all of his sounds.
bonus points if he can make you scream cutely as well! ≧ω≦
w = wild card (a random head canon for the person)
“mmph, fuckkk oscarrrr, feels sooo goood,” you moan with your eyes closed, focused on riding his nose while his tongue did magic to your clit. oscar just hummed in response, the vibrations going right to your core. at first you were a bit worried in case you happened to suffocate your man, but thankfully, the worry dissipated and you were riding your high, oscar with his hands on your thighs. “so fucking hot,” he’d grumble from under you, making you ride his face even faster. when you were close, oscar made sure to tug you down so he could fuck you good with his tongue, lewd noises echoing in the room.
x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on beneath the clothes)
wow your mans is packing. oscar acts chill but that’s because he’s able to be so confident with his figure! there’s no reason to be insecure because baby is packing, and he knows it.
y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
his is quite average, or if anything, below average. he’s learned how to resist his urges when training, and for that reason, only really gets hot and bothered when he sees you! ~>_<~ as long as you’re nearby, all he can think about is that pretty body of yours!
z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
oscar falls asleep rather quickly because he knows he’ll be able to have you all to himself the day after. he knows you’re loyal to him and you’ll also want to spend some quality time with him. you’re his safe space, so naturally, he falls asleep around you! *^_^*
notes:
omg i wrote a whole fxcking report on this man’s sex habits holy sh!t. i wish i could write essays like how i write smut. =_=
but yes, hope you enjoyed reading! <3 who should i do next?
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Note
Can you please do a Wednesday Addams & Enid Sinclair x Male Reader imagine? Where Reader is from a popular family of hybrids and tribrids, where Reader is a Vampire, a Witch and a Shapeshifter. And the three of them became roommates temporarily because there were no more available rooms for him in the boys' dormitory.
Tri-problem (Male)
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Art by TanyaF2022 on X/Twitter.
You sigh as you feel the bumps of the road as the family chauffeur, Jack drives you to Nevermore Academy. You pull out your phone and start swiping on Instagram to see all your "friends" stories and whatnot. Rolling your eyes you start to block them all one by one. "Are you okay young sir?" Jack asks as he looks at you in the rearview mirror. "I told you to call me Y/N," you said annoyed. "But if you must know I'm just annoyed. Why am I being punished for something that my parents agree was the right action?" "Well, I doubt the school board was happy to hear you almost ended the life of your classmate," Jack said causing you to roll your eyes. "Please. No one would've missed him. He deserved it. He assaulted Normies to feed his ego. There is no excuse for that." "Yes, but you decided to, hex him, suck out almost two liters of his blood, and shapeshifted into a silverback gorilla to break both his arms," Jack said flatly. "And?" You said as if it wasn't a big deal. Jack just sighed.
"Well Mister L/N your father had informed me of your... predicament," Larissa Weems, the principal of Nevermore said as you sat across from her. "We have had your uniform custom made as your family requested but... I- uh..." she stumbled over her words causing you to raise an eyebrow. "We have no space in the boy's dormitory... and well... since you have no family in Jericho... I'm afraid you'll have to stay in the girls dormitory..." "You gotta be kidding me..."
She was indeed not kidding... here you were... standing in front of a dorm in Ophelia Hall... "Fuck my life..." You sigh and knock. Not like you had a choice all your stuff was there... "Enid. The door," you heard a flat cold muffled voice on the other side of the door "Coming~" you heard a second, sweeter warmer muffled voice. Soon the door was opened. "Hello...~ oh- I don't think I know you... have I seen around?" The girl asked her wide smile which showed off her sharp canines never faltering. She was about 5'2, had fair skin, rosy cheeks, pale blue eyes, blond hair with pink and blue tips, a pink sweater with white and maroon diamonds, a maroon skirt, and white thigh-high socks. You see that inside the dorm another girl was sitting at a desk writing in a typewriter. She had pale skin, black hair that was tied into two even braids, anthracite eyes, and a blank yet focused expression. She wore a pair of black boots, black jeans that went over the boots, a black shirt with white stripes that were slightly above her belly button, a black shirt with Ghostface on it that was the same length as the undershirt, a black vest, and a pair of black fingerless gloves. Before you were able to answer the blond girl's question, the ravenette turned and looked at you, her cold piercing gaze locked with your gaze as she spoke. "Y/N L/N. Correct?" Her voice was cold and monotone. "...Y-Yeah..." You mumble as the blonde's expression lit up. "You're our new roomie!" She exclaimed grabbing your hand and pulling you inside. Now inside you, we're able to see the room clearer. It was split in half, the spider web window was only halfway filled with color on, what you assume is the blonde's side, the other side had no color and was just normal glass with no tint. The blonde's side of the room was very colorful. Her bed frame was white and her blanket was splattered with multiple colors, her bed was on top of a puzzle-like rug with each piece being colored differently, ribbons were hanging from the ceiling, and a desk littered with notebooks, markers, pens, etc. A bean bag chair, posters, and so much more. The ravenette's side was the complete opposite. There was a lamp, a black cello, a black sheet music stand, a desk with a black typewriter, a black bed, and a black leather chair. All your stuff was neatly set in a corner of the room. The blonde let go of her hand as she looked at you her grin somehow wider. "My name is Enid Sinclair! I'm a Fur, AKA a werewolf! Nice to meet you roomie!" Enid said excitingly as she went to the ravenette and grabbed her cheeks making her look at you. "This is Wednesday Addams! She may look gloomy but she's a softie!" Enid exclaimed before Wednesday leaned away scowling. "...Nice to meet two..." You mumbled. "So~," Enid said as she leaned closer to you so close you could feel her breath on your face. "What are you? Fur, Scales, Fangs, Psychic, or something else?" She asked curiously. "Personal space Enid," Wednesday reprimanded her from her chair causing Enid to lean back pouting muttering "I was just asking..." under her breath. "I'm a tribrid... I'm part Vampire, Witch, and Shapeshifter," You explained as Wednesday stood from her typewriter. "Your family is known for that are they not?" Wednesday asked rhetorical. "Your family is known for giving birth to Hybrids and Tribrids," She said monotone with her cold expression. "Yeah... they are," you said as Wednesday nodded. "Weems had informed us of your... incident. Try to behave yourself," Wednesday said as she headed for the door. "Unpack and try not to make a mess of things," she said before leaving. "She always like that?" You ask. "Pretty much," replies Enid.
As the next two weeks passed you got accustomed to living with the two. You found out that Enid would try and snoop when you were on your phone or laptop to find something to put on her blog. When you caught her she blushed and turned away but after that day she would randomly ask to things, favorite color, would you rathers, song taste, etc. You got used to "Addams schedule," as Enid calls it. Basically when she did her writing when she wanted to be left alone, when she would leave for coffee, etc.
As time went on Wednesday had admitted she got used to your presence and even let you watch her write. Yoko, a fellow vampire and friend of Enid said that most Vamipres have a calming presence around them. Ironic. So since Wednesday hadn't really spent a prolonged time near vampires she was getting a heavy dose of it.
Enid on the other hand would paint your nails, do your hair, take you on friend dates, etc. You would talk to her about werewolf stuff, since you had cousins who were part werewolf you could relate in some aspects. After five months of living with the roommates, Weems came to visit.
"Hello girls, and Mr. L/N." "Yo," you did a two-finger salute from Enid's bed, your head in her lap as she dyed the tips of your hair. "I have news, one of the boys has moved out of his dorm as his parents found a suitable house in Jericho, so that means that Mr. L/N here will finally be moving to the boys' dorm. Fun!" Weems said with a smile but Enid stood up causing your head to fall onto the mattress. "What!? B-but he can't- I mean-," Enid stammered but Wednesday spoke I'm her usual monotone and cold tone. "What Enid is trying to say is we don't wish for Y/N's leave. He's been here for six months now. We have grown attached. So much so," Wednesday said as she stood from her desk and walked over to you, who had sat up. She cupped your face, causing you to raise an eyebrow, she then leaned down and kissed you softly. Her hands were cold to the touch. Her lips were soft and plush and tasted like coffee. Wednesday soon pulled away and looked at Weems. "We've started a polygamous relationship," She said as she looked at Enid who was blushing. Enid quickly walked over to you and kissed you as well. She was nervous, unlike Wednesday. Her lips were warm and soft. They also tasted like milk tea. Weems blinked a few times at this action. "W-well... this certainly complicated things..." she said as she looked at you. "I will... talk to your mother... see what she says about this...," She spoke before leaving. You were flustered and confused. The room was silent for a few seconds before Wednesday spoke. "I have him Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. We share Sunday." "T-that works..." Enid mumbled. "The fuck just happened?" You ask as Wednesday rolls her eyes. "You just got two girlfriends."
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zepskies · 7 months
Text
The Old-Fashioned Way
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x F. Reader
Summary: You and Dean are having trouble trying to start a family. What happens when you turn to a spell for a possible solution? [Soulmate AU]
AN: Happy Valentine's Day! ❣️ Welcome back to the Never Say Goodbye-verse, my first ever Soulmate AU! Feels appropriate to celebrate today with some soulmates lol.
Honestly, I have really missed these two. I can’t believe it’s almost been a year since I wrote this series! And I’ve been wanting to find a way to come back to it, so when I recently got this request, I couldn't resist:
The reader finds out she is pregnant and Dean’s reaction.
But of course, I couldn’t make it that simple… This story takes place five years after the Bonus Tracks (3-part sequel).
Word Count: 5,000
Tags/Warnings: Established relationship (marriage). Soulmates, angst, issues in pregnancy, hurt/comfort, fluff, implied smut.
❤️ Series Masterlist
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Today marked five years that Dean had been an officer of the Sioux Falls Police Department.
After twenty-eight odd years of committing felonies of varying degrees…mostly for the greater good, he still found it strange sometimes.
He’d been partnered with his father-in-law, Jack, and by now, Dean had finally lost his sense of “imposter syndrome.”
Jody bought him a pie to commemorate the occasion, and while a little embarrassed, he wasn’t mad about it. The precinct employees now shared the dessert on paper plates from their respective desks and cubicles.
Dean sat in the bullpen with Jack (who was on a call), Jody, and even Jessie Deluca, the boy he’d once arrested for stealing candy and groceries from a gas station.
Well, Jessie wasn’t such a kid anymore. He was now their 18-year-old intern.
“How’s the boysenberry?” Jody asked Dean. Her lips curved upward when he turned to her with a crumb-covered smile. 
“Real good,” he said.
She couldn’t help but laugh a little. “I can’t with this. Come ‘ere.”
She grabbed a napkin and leaned over to wipe at his mouth the way a mother would her errant child. Dean just rolled his eyes.
“Really?” he snipped.
“You look like my five-year-old son after a round of SpaghettiOs,” she said.
“Makes you wonder how his wife deals with him,” Jessie muttered under his breath while he entered expense reports into his computer. Never mind that he had a purple berry stain around the corner of his mouth.
Dean shot him a wry look, along with his crumpled napkin.
“I don’t wanna hear that from a punk like you,” he teased. “You haven’t had a girlfriend since…what, junior prom?”
Jessie fended off the stained napkin with a grimace. But he also smarted at the dig. His arms crossed defensively as he leaned back in his chair.
“As a matter a fact, I’ve got a date on Friday,” he sniffed. “And no, I’m not telling you her name.”
Dean and Jody shared an amused look.
“Aww, look at him, pretending he’s got a date,” Dean said. He fought a deeper grin when Jessie threw the disgusting napkin back at him.
“Fine! Her name’s Annie. You happy now?” Jessie said.
Dean shared another look with Jody.
“Aww, he’s actually got a date,” said Dean. He smirked at the kid next. “Lemme know if you need to borrow some cologne. Chicks dig that.”
“Ugh,” Jessie groaned. He leaned his elbows on his desk and pushed the palms of his hands into his eyes. He knew he’d be catching flack on this for the rest of the week.
Dean chuckled, but before he had a chance to tease their intern some more, his cell phone rang. It was you, and he felt his good mood continue as he answered.
“Hey, baby.”
“Hey, how’s the day going?” you asked.
“Good,” he replied. “We’re on lunch break. Jody got me a pie for my five-year mark at the PD.”
“Aw, that’s so sweet…literally. She knows you too well,” you laughed.
He nodded in agreement. “Yeah, she really does.”
“Tell her and everyone else I said hi.”
“Will do,” he said with a smile. “You just callin’ to check up on me?”
“Well, that, and…when are you getting home tonight?” you asked. The smooth, leading note of your voice had Dean’s lips curving into a smirk.
“Ah, well…” He pushed away from his desk and stepped away from the bullpen for a little privacy in the hall. “That depends. What’s going on?”
“Let’s just say…I have an idea,” you replied. It had Dean’s brows raising. You’d been having a lot of ideas for the past year, and he’d been more than ready and willing for most of them.
“Oh, yeah?” he intoned. While he leaned against the wall in the main hallway of the precinct, his arm crossed under his elbow as he continued holding the phone to his ear. “What’d you have in mind?”
“You’ll just have to find out,” you said.
It only took his brain about a moment and a half to compute.
“All right. In that case, I’ll try to be home promptly at six, barring there’s no shootouts at the 7-Eleven,” he quipped.
“Ugh, please, don’t even joke about that,” you said, your tone sobering.
Dean realized, without even having to read his soulmate’s thoughts, that you were reminded of the last time an explosive incident happened at the local gas station, just two weeks before their wedding day. He dimmed as well. 
“Yeah, ‘m sorry,” he said, swiping a hand over his mouth. “Uh…okay. I’ll see you tonight, sweetheart.”
“Okay, be careful,” you said. You always said it—in the morning, whenever he left for work, whenever you two managed to talk during the day. It was routine, but it also wasn’t. 
And you still wished him a good rest of his day before you hung up. Dean pocketed his phone and returned to the bullpen, where Jody was putting away the rest of the pie. He eyed her just to know exactly where she was setting it down in the kitchen, for future reference.
Jessie peered up from his computer and asked if that was you on the phone.
“Yeah, she says hi,” Dean replied.
Jessie smirked. “‘Course she does. I’m her favorite.”
Dean shot him a look, knowing the kid liked you probably even more than he liked Dean. You’d become like a big sister to Jessie…but it didn’t stop Dean from occasionally being annoyed. 
“Shut up and eat your pie.”
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Dean arrived that night, more or less on time, to find that you’d cooked up a feast. It was laid out across the dining table: steak, scalloped potatoes, carrots and broccoli, and even freshly baked cornbread with butter. 
“Is it my birthday again?” he asked, despite it already being February. 
He ventured into the kitchen where you were getting two bottles of beer. You looked up at him with a smile when he came over and held you from behind. You enjoyed the warmth of his body pressed against your back, while his hands found your hips.
“I cook all the time, Dean,” you pointed out. He pressed a kiss to the side of your head in greeting.
“Hmm. Yeah, but now my spidey senses are tingling,” he said.
You set down the beer before turning in his embrace and twining your arms around his neck. Already he could feel your anticipation through the soul bond, but that was all you were letting him sense. You were keeping your walls up a bit, to stop him from hearing your thoughts. In this case, it felt like a tease.
You tilted your head, a smile playing across your lips. “Oh, yeah?”
Dean smirked down at you. “Oh, yeah.”
You laughed and let him greet you properly with a kiss. You returned it, affectionately caressing his cheek, but you stopped him before he could start pressing you harder into the counter. You held up a placating hand against his chest.
“Wait, wait, the food’s gonna get cold,” you said. And all too quickly, you’d extricated yourself from his arms and went to finish placing the silverware on the table. Dean begrudgingly followed suit by helping you with the glasses and plates.
Dinner was delicious. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had a steak that good; you two had been scrounging and saving to get out of this apartment and buy a house, along with other things you and Dean had been planning for your future.
By the time the leftovers were put away and the dishes were put in the dishwasher, he started to sense that you were ready to come around with the real reason you’d called him at work today, let alone made such a nice and expensive meal. You went over to where he stood at the kitchen sink and rubbed his arm.
“Hey,” you greeted.
Dean tried to stifle his knowing smile. “Yeah?”
But when he looked over at you, he realized you seemed nervous, not flirtatious. You were serious, and now, he was concerned.
“What?” he asked.
You sighed, hesitating for a moment. Then you went over to a nearby drawer and got some rubber gloves you always kept at work and at home—the kind doctors wore.
You went for your large work bag that normally stored your laptop and files, and instead, you pulled out an old book. Dean’s brows raised of their own accord, considering the last time you accidentally trifled with a book like that.
“What the hell is that?” he asked, with some trepidation. You laid the book out on the kitchen counter.
“It’s a journal of some kind, written in Latin, dating back from the late 1500s. Can you believe that?” Your head raised from where you were examining the cover and spine, but Dean was incredulous.
“What’re you doing with that?” he asked. Your lips pursed, and he felt a tendril of your guilt.
Most likely, you’d taken it from the museum where you worked without permission. You were in charge of the growing library of ancient texts that were stored there, and most of them were too old and valuable for exhibition, even behind glass. He doubted you were even allowed to open this book, let alone “borrow” it from the museum.
You sighed and held up a placating hand. “Okay, Dean, just hear me out.”
You opened the book to a page you’d placed a strip of paper in for bookmarking purposes. You pointed at a page filled with scrawled words that Dean didn’t really understand. Sam was always better at reading Latin.
“That is a fertility spell,” you said.
The weight of that fell between you for a moment, rendering Dean speechless. It took a few seconds for his brain to register what you were saying, followed quickly by a sad, contemplative frown as he stared back at you. You were serious about this, even hopeful. 
“Sweetheart, we don’t need that,” he said, shaking his head. Your expression firmed, though it became touched with melancholy.
“It’s been a year, Dean,” you said. “We’ve been trying for a year, and I’m still not pregnant.”
He blew out a breath. “The doctor said—”
“We’ve done everything the doctor said,” you snapped. “Fertility treatments are either going to take too long or are too expensive, and they still carry risks.”
“And this isn’t a risk?” Dean shot back, gesturing at the book. “You don’t know if this will work, or what the hell it’ll really do to you.”
Your brows furrowed, but you didn’t back down. You held your hands to your hips.
“Uncle Bobby said it’s legit,” you said. Dean blinked in surprise. He shifted back on his heels and crossed his arms.
“You ran this by Bobby before me?” he said. You could feel the small lance of his upset, as well as see it across his face.
You bit the inside of your lip. “I just wanted to make sure!”
Dean took in a deep breath. He mentally counted to five.
“What exactly did he say?” he asked.
You paused at that. “…Well, he said it was a real spell.”
His brows rose. “And?”
“And…that magic is unpredictable and we should talk about it first. But that’s why we’re talking now!” you reasoned. 
Your husband’s gaze lifted heavenward as he threw up his hands in aggravation.
“Dean—” you tried, but it didn’t stop him from snatching up the book. Despite your protests, he took it with him into the master bedroom you shared and shoved the book into his nightstand. You had followed him this far, but you stopped short when he turned around to face you.
“I will check this out,” he said, and his tone boded no argument. “But for the record, I’m against this. Magic is unpredictable at best, and not for nothing, it always comes at a price. I’ll be damned if you’re gonna pay it again.”
You paused. Hearing the vehemence in his tone, feeling the force of emotion behind his words, and your own circling memories of being possessed by a magic-wielding goddess…it had you nodding in agreement, even as tears welled up in your eyes.
Dean faltered a little inside. Always the damn tears. He gathered you into his arms and held you close in comfort. He pressed a kiss to your forehead.
“We’ll figure this out. I promise,” he said.
You tried to believe him.
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Late that night, however, you couldn’t help yourself.
Once you were sure Dean was asleep beside you, hearing his deep, even breaths, you made your move. Dressed in just an old college shirt and some pajama shorts, you slid out of bed and tiptoed over to his nightstand to get the book.
You took it into the kitchen and started assembling the ingredients Bobby had reluctantly helped you translate. (He didn’t know that you had taken a couple of items from his house for the spell.) 
You prepared them in a bowl. The resulting liquid looked brown and disgusting. You mixed it around, grimacing at the smell, and carefully poured it into a glass. The last thing the spell required was a few drops of your blood, and then you were supposed to drink it. 
God, this is terrible, you thought. Part of you couldn’t believe you were going through with this, but…you grabbed a kitchen knife in order to make a shallow cut on your palm. 
The steel was poised against your hand. You took a fortifying breath, but before you could cut into your skin, Dean grabbed your wrist with a strong grip, startling a gasp out of you.
“What the hell are you doing?!” he said, or more like shouted. He was irate, his voice bounding off the walls of the apartment.
You knew he had every right to be, and you didn’t have a good answer for him. Shock had stifled you into silence.
Dean let go of you and took the glass next. He peered in disgust at the concoction inside, but he quickly dumped it into the sink and ignored your protests. He threatened to burn the damn book next.
“Dean, stop! Please,” you said tearfully as you stilled his hands on the book. “If there’s some kind of price to the spell, I’ll pay it!”
“What’re you talking about! Are you crazy?” he asked, through furrowed brows. You squeezed his hands.
“Believe me, I love what we have. I love our life, my job, all of it,” you said. “But I want a family, and I want it with you.”
Dean started to soften at that, when you met his eyes. You paused, taking in a shaky breath.
“It should be simple, but it’s not," you said. "I just can’t understand why it’s so impossible. Why…why there’s something wrong with me.”
Dean’s anger broke down, bit by bit the more you spoke. He let go of the book and reached for you. He held you against his chest, rubbing your back as you quietly wept. You tried to stifle it, but that just made your body tremble even more. He did his best to steady you, rocking you back and forth. His eyes closed for a moment.
You both knew that the expensive fertility doctor hadn’t found anything wrong with either of you, even after a month of testing.
“In certain cases, it just takes longer for some couples,” she’d said. But clearly, you had just been blaming yourself. Dean couldn’t abide that.
“There’s nothing wrong with you,” he said firmly. “Believe me, I want that too. But I also want to make sure you’re safe.”
Emotion clogged in his throat when he thought about what might’ve happened if he hadn’t stopped you. And in turn, you sobered even more when you managed to pick up on his thoughts.
“If something would’ve happened, and I was too late to stop it,” he said, clearing his throat. “…I just can’t, okay?”
After a moment, you nodded. You allowed yourself to rest against his chest and try to calm the racing of your heart. All the while, you tried your best not to resent him for stopping you.
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The next day was a Saturday. You slept in because your body needed it, after the stress of last night. When you woke up, Dean wasn’t beside you. His keys and the Impala were gone, but he’d left you a text: he’d gone to your uncle Bobby’s place. 
And you saw that he’d taken the book as well. Predictable. 
You felt bad for how you tried to go behind your husband’s back, but if you were honest with yourself, you were still upset at him for stopping you, even if you understood why he did it. 
You sat on the edge of your bed. Not for the first time since you and Dean were separated by miles of roads and his family’s mission to find the thing that killed his mother, you found yourself praying. 
Please, God…or if there’s even anyone up there…please help me.
For a while, there was silence in the room. 
But even if your eyes were open, you wouldn’t have seen the being that was standing in front of you. He stared down at you with a tilted head, finding himself a bit too curious. Hesitantly, he reached his hand out and touched your forehead. 
You didn’t completely register the feeling that washed over you. It was like the tingling of a breeze across your skin. You took it for a chill in the room as you shivered a little. Then you opened your eyes, and resigned yourself to starting your day. 
Castiel left the room with but a thought and a flutter of wings. 
He knew he was only supposed to observe Michael’s vessel, not his soulmate. And yet, with one touch, he had sensed the rare genetic defect your doctor had missed.
Your mother had unknowingly suffered the condition as well. Your father never told you this, but she’d nearly lost you in the early stages of her pregnancy. It had been a miracle that you were born at all. 
Castiel fixed the problem. 
He knew what Uriel, or even Naomi would say. Perhaps they didn’t need to know, in this case. They were both far too busy for worldly trifles. Even so, Castiel knew he wasn’t authorized to heal you.
Still, it felt…right. And so, he did it. 
It confused him.
…Maybe it isn’t something to be closely examined, he thought.
With that agreement within himself, he resolved to leave that decision behind him, and continue watching from afar. Those were his orders, after all.
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Visiting Bobby Singer wasn’t as productive as Dean wanted it to be. The men had been arguing in Bobby’s living room for close to an hour.
Dean was upset with him for translating that goddamn spell for you, but the old man didn’t have a good answer. They both knew you were like a daughter to him.
“She came in hot, all damn stubborn and sass up to here,” Bobby said, holding a hand up to his forehead. “But you try sayin’ no when the waterworks starts.”
…Dean could concede that, but he rubbed his face in frustration. 
“What do I do here, Bobby?” he asked, holding up the spell book in question. Apparently, it was more like a journal; it was rumored to have belonged to a sixteenth-century witch named Rowena. “I don’t trust this thing. Deep in my gut, I know it.”
Bobby considered him for a moment. In fact, he gave Dean a long-suffering look that made him really see Bobby’s age. 
“Then trust your gut, son,” was all he said. 
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Dean returned home with a peace offering: some apple crumble pie. You were lying on the sofa watching mindless TV, still in your pajamas. Your mental walls were down, so Dean could both see and feel how miserable you were. 
He took out the pie from the small bag of groceries he carried and held it up so you could see.
“I come bearing sugar,” he said. He also set down a bottle of wine on the dining table. You were focused on the pie, however.
“Who’s that for, me or you?” you dryly remarked. 
“I got ice cream too,” he said, shaking the grocery bag. 
You smiled a little, but he could feel through the bond that you were still sour at him. He sighed and went over to you. He set down the bribery on the coffee table and settled a hand on your pajama-clad thigh. 
“Sweetheart, I am sorry.” 
Sighing, you turned off the TV and sat up against the other end of the couch. You eyed him with a frown.
“You’re not sorry about chucking the spell,” you accused. Or for stealing the book you’d eventually have to bring back to work, lest your boss notice something amiss in the inventory.
“No, I’m not,” said Dean. “It was dangerous. I felt it. And that gut feeling? That’s what’s saved me more times than I can damn count.” 
You were still upset, you couldn’t deny…but you understood his point. When he beckoned you over, you were more willing to go to him. After you scooted closer, he wrapped an arm around your waist and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
“Look, I’ll go to whatever doctors you want, try whatever treatments, however long it takes,” he said.
You sighed, but you eventually agreed with a teary nod. “Okay. Thank you.”
Even with that, Dean wasn’t convinced that he was getting through to you. He was picking up on a thread of hopelessness that you were trying to hide.
He’d just have to change that.
“But…” He earned your attention by squeezing your side. His lips formed a grin. “I still think we can do this the old-fashioned way.”
He slowly rubbed a hand up and down your back. With the other hand, he reached for your face, tracing your lower lip with his thumb. You smiled slightly at his teasing. Part of you wanted to heed the suggestion in his eyes, and the familiar warmth and promise in his touch. The other, more vulnerable part of you hesitated.
When you caught sight of something over his shoulder, you had to smile a little more.
“I see you got a bottle of Merlot,” you said. A notable upgrade from beer. You couldn’t remember the last time Dean had willingly bought some “bougie-ass” wine.
“A little pie, a little booze…” you noted.
Dean grinned. “I’m thinking we have a not-so-quiet night in.”
Your brows rose, and you hummed in surprise. “Is my husband trying to butter me up?”
“Nah,” he said, tilting your face back up to his. “Your husband’s trying to seduce you.”  
You giggled at that…at first. But it seemed he was serious.
You accepted his passionate kiss. Closing your eyes, you reached blindly for his shirt and held on while his lips moved ardently against yours. Through the bond, you felt his desire like it was your own.
In the five years you’d been married, and the years you were together even before, there were often moments where it was impossible to discern what was him and what was you. 
The beautiful thing about it was, that part didn’t matter too much. Especially not when you and Dean became a tangle of limbs, lips, and tongue on the couch. He ridded you of your threadbare pajamas, and you helped him halfway out of his shirt and jeans before he yanked the rest of it off himself.
And all while he drew lusty moans and sighs and pleasure from your body in the comfort of your living room, the ice cream slowly melted in its container on the coffee table—completely forgotten, along with the pie.
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That night, you lied awake in his arms for a while. Round one on the couch had migrated to rounds two and three in the bedroom, and you were almost too exhausted to sleep. 
It had been months since you and Dean had sex without thinking of calendars and timing, optimal positions and ovulation.
This felt right, you thought, as you stroked his arm that was wrapped around your waist. Even though your skin was sticking to his under the sheets and your frizzy hair was probably tickling his neck, he didn’t seem to mind.
Dean? you tried through the bond, seeing if he was awake. He felt like he was still in-between wakefulness and sleep. At your prodding though, he slipped back into the former. 
“Hmm?” he replied. You let out a sigh in the dark. 
“I’m sorry I kind of tried to take matters into my own hands, with the spell.”
He hmphed in response. “Kinda?”
Your lips twitched upwards. 
“This is a ‘together’ thing,” you said. “I made it all about me.”
Dean shook his head at that. He responded through the bond. No, you didn’t.
I did, you insisted. You were right to stop me. I didn’t care about the consequences…but that’s not fair to you. To either of us.
He took that in with a deep sigh of his own.
“It’s okay. We want the same thing,” he said. “And we’ll get there, baby. Don’t you worry.”
“What makes you so sure?” you asked.
“…I don’t know. I just am.”
You closed your eyes, and once again, you tried to believe him. You let his heartbeat and the sound of his steady breathing lull you to sleep. 
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Nine weeks later…
You were alone in the bathroom at seven in the morning. After almost a month late on your period, you were also staring at two positive lines on your last pregnancy test. 
Ho…ly…shit.
Dean was already at work. This wasn’t something you wanted to tell him over the phone, however. 
How the hell am I supposed to keep this from him all day? you thought.
But then again, maybe this was a good thing. You had time to make sure.
So you called out of work for a personal day, and you immediately called your doctor on your way out to the closest pharmacy. You were going to need a few more tests. 
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When Dean eventually got home that evening, there were two pizzas waiting for him. The smell was already making his mouth water. He peeked under the hood of each box and rubbed his hands together. 
“Ooh, awesome.” Pepperoni, sausage, and double cheese. His favorite.
You appeared then from the kitchen with a strange smile on your face. 
“Hey!” you chirped, but you seemed a bit distracted as you pulled out a sheet pan of cookies from the oven. You nearly dropped them when the corner of the pan banged against the oven. 
Something was off with you. Dean knew it intuitively. He went over and tried to steady you with a hand on the small of your back. He could see that you were frazzled, but he realized, with a frown, that you had your walls up again. He couldn’t pick up on what you were thinking.
“You okay?” he asked. “What’s going on?”
“Uh…well, something,” you nodded and wiped your hands after you peeled the oven mitts off. “And I need to tell you about it before I bake everything in the house, including the expired bran muffins.”
Dean was growing more concerned by the moment. He knew for a fact he’d hidden that bran muffin mix deep in the pantry, so you wouldn’t force him to eat a “healthy dessert.”
“Okay, what?” he asked.
You paused, steeling yourself with a breath.
You then took his hand and led him to the bedroom, into the adjoining bathroom. Across the entire counter were no less than seven pregnancy tests. 
All positive.
Dean’s breath caught in his lungs. Slowly he turned back to you with his widened eyes.
“Surprise?” you smiled, a little nervously. 
Dean grasped the counter and had to sit down hard on the closed toilet seat. 
“Yeah, I did that too,” you said. You couldn’t help but giggle as you caressed his face. He grabbed your hip, both to bring you closer and for added stability. You two had been trying to make this happen for over a year, but the gravity of this being real was finally hitting him. 
He stared up at your face with a growing smile. “This is happening.” 
You nodded, smiling through your burgeoning tears. 
“Yeah. It is,” you replied. “Dean, you’re gonna be a dad.”
That realization had him nodding, swallowing hard and blinking past a sting in his eyes. 
He wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you in between his knees. You threaded your fingers through his hair, and his head came to rest against your stomach. He pressed a kiss there, over your shirt. 
After a moment to gather himself, he rocked back onto his feet. Then he enveloped you in a secure and warm embrace. He kissed the side of your head, and you felt his smile there.
“We did it, baby,” he said.  
“And that was the easy part,” you quipped, making him laugh. Yet the holy shit of it all hit him in a new wave—one you felt through the bond. You had to take a deep breath to steady yourself as well.
“Oh my God, this is happening,” he repeated.
You uttered a tearful laugh. “Uh, yeah, Dean.”
He was still smiling, but it started to dim a little. 
“We’re ready, right?” he asked.
You chuckled, wiping at your eyes. “We better be.”
Dean nodded and pulled back enough to see your face. You met his gaze. Maybe you’d just had more time than him to process it all, but you finally felt a sense of peace.
“Together, right?” he said.
“Yeah,” you smiled. “Together.”
Dean let out a deep breath. “Shit, I gotta tell Sam.”
Your smile brightened and you squeezed his arms.
“Let’s call him!" you said. "Hopefully Eileen’s there too.”
The two had moved in together a couple of years ago, after Eileen officially retired from hunting. But she often had long shifts at her job, just like Sam did at the law firm he started working for after he graduated from law school, near the top of his class.  
While you and Dean went into the bedroom to call Sam together, an angel watched from a distance, unseen by human eyes.
He found himself smiling.
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AN: Ahh I'm soft. 🥰 I hope you all enjoy this as much as I had fun diving back into Never Say Goodbye.
And I won't say that I'll never come back to it in the future...for obvious reasons. 😉
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Series Masterlist
Dean Winchester Series List
Dean Winchester Masterlist
Series + Dean Tag List (Part 1):
I did my best to get everyone who was tagged in the original run of the series first, then my normal Dean tag list.
@curlycarley @chubby-teddybear @jamerlynn @iprobablyshipit91 @globetrotter28 @deamus-liv @deans-spinster-witch @my-proof-is-you @vera0124 @deans-baby-momma @lacilou @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @theonlymaninthesky @spnexploration @itzabbyxx @cevans-winchester @imagineteller1
@icequeen1371 @tiredqueen73 @bitchwitch1981 @abbigaleelizabeth @ohgodthebogisback @where-the-river-bends @loveprof6 @shadowcrowsworld @thespnlover @this-is-me19 @stevenknightmarc @leigh70 @syrma-sensei @brain-has-left
@hobby27 @ashbatz @saranghaey @jori21 @lillyrob @adoringanakin @agirlwithdemonblood @mimaria420 @nephil-with-a-gun @writethrough @iamsapphine @definitelymentallyderanged @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer
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445 notes · View notes
itsnotgray · 9 months
Text
what a duo | jack hughes
imagine jack hughes with a grumpy x sunshine trope
like you’ve got mr.sunshine personified, who somehow winds up with his own little storm cloud.
~
he meets her at a bar in jersey, where she’s sitting in the corner, fondly watching her friends, happy to stay out of their chaos. and jack just spots her from across the room, dead set on getting to know who she is.
now, the second she makes eye contact with him, she knows who he is. how could she not? his face is plastered all over jersey, the gem of the city. but does that make her change her normal attitude? ahahaha- no.
she immediately locks eyes with him, and says “no, nice try,” and makes her way to her friends, unable to see jacks entire body seemingly recoil at her rejection.
a few days later, one of nico’s friends is having a baby shower, and nico unfortunately couldn’t make it, claiming he was “sick” (jack knew the man had a date he thought jack didn’t know about) instead, sending jack in his place.
jack, while loving to be social, isn’t into being social with a massive crowd of strangers. so instead, he gravitated towards the corner. where, surprise surprise- he’s met with the face of the woman who rejected him.
upon seeing the man, she goes to move away, before seeing his demeanor not as cheerful as she remembered it (which she instantly decided she hated. he should always be cheerful- it looked so much better on him).
“what, not running away this time?” he snaps, eyes glued to the masses of people congregating in the backyard. after a few beats of silence, she sighs, before answering, “i’m sorry.” “stormy, apologizing to me? never thought i’d see the day!” he exclaims, cheerful personality seeping through his pores yet again, a brightness within him unable to be contained.
she giggles, quickly getting used to his antics, before pausing. “…stormy?” she questioned, head tilting in jack’s direction (jack thinks she looks adorable- a bit like an angry kitten).
“well when i saw you in the corner of the bar, you looked like the sad guy in the cartoons who has a literal storm cloud hovering over their head,” he shyly muttered, taking a sip of the now warm drink clasped in his hand, glancing nervously towards the sea of people.
a longer period of silence ensues, jack beginning to grow fearful of her reaction. so much so, that he goes to get up to relocate to the opposite corner of the room, before she suddenly speaks.
“well then i guess that makes you sunshine?” she questions in a teasing tone.
“excuse me?” he quickly answers, confusion radiating from his body.
“if i reminded you of a storm cloud, then i guess that makes you sunshine. because the minute you made your way towards me, despite my reaction, you lit up the room jack. so- that makes you sunshine,” she finishes, her cheeks growing red, matching the red tinge on jack’s cheeks
at her sudden outburst, jack has relaxed back into his seat, a comfortable silence now taking over.
the pair sit in a short silence before jack breaks it, “sunshine and a storm cloud- what a duo we are,” he states, causing the duo to burst into a fit of giggles.
and that- that was the start of something truly beautiful.
417 notes · View notes
imaginesig · 9 months
Text
“If they call me a slut, you know it might be worth if for once”
Lewis Hamilton x singer!reader
SMAU
yourusername
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liked by lewishamilton, user1, y/nhq, and 402,038 others
yourusername: my muse <3
tagged lewishamilton
lewishamilton its an honor love
user1 when will I find someone to call me love
lando.jpg your own jpg account when??
yourusername I'll stick to my day job
user2 anybody else bothered by how quickly she goes from man to man
user3 right? like I swear she's had about 7 "muses" in the past 3 years
user4 she's literally done nothing wrong?? how dare a women date more than 1 person in her life??
carlossainz55 so new music when?
Charles_leclerc the Ferrari playlist needs an update
yourusername update loading 🔄
user5 oh please be a new album!!
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lewishamilton
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liked by roscoovescoco, yourusername, user6, and 183,829 others
lewishamilton: race weekend with my loves
tagged: mercadesamgf1, roscoelovescoco, yourusername
landonorris interesting order
yourusername we all know Roscoe is the real star here
roscoelovescoco listen to the lady 🙌
mercadesmhf1 we love having the Hamilton family in the paddock
yourusername ahhh love to be there!!
lewishamilton 💚
georgerussell63 always a good time with these two in the house
yourusername ahhhh Georgie 🫶🫶
user1 "Georgie" 🥹😭
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tmz_offical
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liked by user9, user1, user3, and 937,273 others
tmz_offical: just days after the end of the season, f1 driver Lewis Hamilton is spotted out with young girlfriend Y/n L/n. The couple is notorious for keeping their privacy, making paparazzi pictures a rare instance. Click the link in our bio to see what else was taken during their night out on the town.
tagged lewishamilton, yourusername
user1 no wonder they keep private, I would too if ended up trapped in a relationship with a slut like her
user2 didn't she and Dylan O'Brian break up right before they got together? Didn't think he rebound guy would last this long
user3 I could never imagine dating someone that much older than me
user4 fr someone tell her to take it down a notch, her sluttiness is showing
User8 the one sided hate is mid boggling
user5 the negativity is DEFINING
user6 right, y'all can't stand to see a women happy, healthy, and unbothered
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y/nupdates
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liked by lewishamilton, user5, user9, and 749,934 more
y/nupdates: Y/n seen outside the studio with her producer after radio silence all winter!!
tagged yourusername
user1 she's cooking
user2 she's entering her reputation era I can feel it
user3 fr, after that one tmz post blows up and her comments are flooded with negativity, she locked herself away with her love, and is now seen for the first time in awhile leaving the studio
user4 I CANT HANDLE THIS RN
user5 not the slut trying for a comeback
user6 how about you lead by example? Leave and don't come back 🫶
user8 you know the records gonna slap when @/producer sprinkled her magic
user9 I need them and Taylor+Jack to release something
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yourusername
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liked by user5, lewishamilton, y/nhq, and 394,028 others
yourusername: "Slut!" out now on all streaming platforms!! The rest of the album, "Amor Omnia Vincit" out this Friday!
when I originally sat down to create this new album I didn't image I'd write half the songs that made the final cut, but I did. This has been a very therapeutic experience for me.
Thank you to this album, my amazing team, and my lovely muse for keeping me going in the difficult time <3
tagged: y/nhq
lewishamilton you are so Shawn Hunter coded
lewishamilton I love you dear
yourusername I love you too darling
user1 they are so domestic I'm crying 🤭😭
user2 lets all start a thread of our fav lyrics from "Slut!"
user3 "if I'm all dressed up, they might as well be looking at us" WE KNOW THIS COUPLE ALWAYS BRING FIRE FITS
user4 very obvious but "if they call me a slut, you know it might be worth it for once," just hits so hard, like this is an issue she's dealt with for so long but Lewis makes it all better bc their relationship trumps everything
user5 piggy backing off of @/user4 's reasoning, "the sticks and stones they throw froze mid air"
user6 "IN A WORLD OF BOYS HES A GENTLEMAN" 🔛🔝
user7 I'm still not very her admitting that all the negavity around her dating has affected her so bad that she told Lewis "I said it might blow up in your pretty face"
scuderiaferarri we will not apologize for the people we'll become when this drops ‼️
Charles_leclerc we've always been #1 y/n stans
lewishamilton you red fuckers can take two steps back that's my title
carlossainz55 I thought you were her muse?
lewishamilton I'm both
user8 ok possessive king
youruserame for me and me only 🥰
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lewishamilton
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liked by georgerussell64, your username, user1, and 789,739 others
lewishamilton: SO, SO, SO PROUD OF YOU LOVE!! Watching you work through a rough patch with such grace was beautiful. Thank you for allowing me to be apart of it and listen to these songs+more. I'll be your muse forever if you'll have me <3
tagged yourusername, y/nhq
yourusername forever and always <3
lewishamilton <3
user1 that water look very ~aquamarine~ to anyone
user2 he def knew what he was doing
lewishamilton I had a message to send 🤷🏾‍♂️
user2 LMAOOO HES SO PETTY
yourusername sassy man epidemic isn't a joke
user3 I love that she left like people wanted and wrote a whole song to shut down the hater but also put her and Lewis's relationship on the pedestal it deserves
producer such a sweet album!! Some of the best love songs out there!!
Charles_leclerc Vigilante Shit is my new pre-prix anthem
yourusername watch out @/maxverstappen1
maxverstappen this is where the dutch anthem falls silent 😔
carlossainz55 wasn't ready for Dress
yourusername but...
carlossainz55 its my fav
user4 I love that lewis posted for the whole album when Y/n didn't, but she's replying to comments in his section when he isn't
user5 they really are made for each other huh
roscoelovescoco amazing work mom!!
user5 I will never get over the mom
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yourusername
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liked by landonorris, Charles_leclerc, user5, and 937,039 others
yourusername: surprise!! Since this album taught me what it was like to write and create in such an intamate space with very few people/outide influence I wanted to celebrate it with 3 small shows in Monaco, London, and Ottawa!
tickets on sale at 12 pm eastern this friday, see ya then ;)
tagged y/nhq
landonorris do friends get discounts??
yourusername everyone on the grid plus any serious significant others get VIP entry courtesy of me and my team 💖😘
y/nhq we'll be reaching out soon to select the show
lilymhe you don't understand how excited this makes me!!
yourusername well I couldn’t celebrate without my girls (and their men too ig 🙄🤚)
oscarpiastri thanks a lot y/n
alexalbon anybody else feeling loved??
lewishamilton completely 🫶
user1 this will start world war 3 I can feel it
user2 this is the eras tour all over again
user3 except that was selling stadiums, these are small venues
user4 any f1 driver want to link up for a show?? you'll never have to speak to me ever again
user5 I regret to inform you babe, but I think this is the reason she said serious significant others...
user6 official tour soon?? Please mother??
yourusername oh so very soon...
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lewishamilton
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liked by your username, georgerussel64, landonorris, and 379,268 others
lewishamilton "got lovestruck went straight to my head" <3
tagged yourusername
user1 crying throwing up
user2 quoting her song?? that's about him?? I'll be resting my eyes on the highway if anybody needs me
user3 my toaster looks like a fun bath bomb
yourusername "got lovesick all over my bed" <3
landonorris beautiful show, beautiful couple 🧡
yourusername 🧡
scuderiaferrari maybe we're colorblind but that doesn't look like Mercedes green
mercadesamgf1 watch your back
georgerussell64 👀
georgerussell64 slayed so hard
yourusername an honor from the meme king?? I'm not worthy
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yourusername
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liked by Charles_leclerc, user9, lewishamilton, and 930,393 others
yourusername thank you to everyone who came out to a show this weekend!! I had a blast sining new stuff, covers, and old pieces with you all- the love I experienced was unreal!! I cannot wait to see what happens in the future 💖
To all those close to me, our relationships mean the absolute world!! Special love to Lewis who held my hand through my darkest time, showed me what a true relationship was, and gave me a perfect little boy (I love you Roscoe). Darling, its been a wonderful experience being with you <3
tagged y/nhq, landojpg
lewishamilton love you so much angel <3
georgerussell64 definitely gave me and Carmen the night of our lives!!
alexalbon the show was so amazing I almost forgot you flirted with my gf in the invitation
yourusername stay mad
lilymhe 🥵
Roscoelovescoco can I come next time??
yourusername I'll see what I can do...
landjpg thank you for photo creddits and well as the opportunity to photograph these unique shows
yourusername you didn't not dissapoint 👏👏 thank you for doing it
Charles_leclerc I had an amazing time!!!
carlossainze55 you should hear him try to speak, voice complelty gone
yourusername that's the kind of energy we all need
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madkiska · 1 year
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watching the entirety of jrwi: riptide again. here's some important things from the first few episodes that I feel we forgot (<110 mentions too though)
Jay
Had night terrors similar to those of Kubakinta's curse in episode 5, and they eventually start returning even after Loffinlot's curse is lifted ○ All of them were about her family and/or the navy ○ I simply think people leave her out of the nightmare stuff and she deserves it. Hurt her more, please (he said, lovingly)
was actually very upset at having to use her medal to get a Loffinlot rebellion to shut up ○ This could be because she didn't want them to guess she was a spy, but I choose to believe it's because she felt guilty
"If you're gonna be sailing with someone, you should have a good relationship with them. [nervous chuckle]." She says, while asking him for information about the Black Rose Pirates (ep. 10)
Said "thank god they didn't find me" after a nightmare about the navy attacking. Even when she was supposedly a spy, who one day would have to return to the navy ○ Very unclear if she was scared of her dad, or if it's because she was a secret spy so the navy would've just killed her
Rewatching, she was suspiciously into the plundering and gold and stuff. Like that was real sus. It doesn't fit her current character much
The only one among them who's gambled before
Chip
The entire thing literally starts off with Bizly holding a lit match
Called Gillion "Gill" and Jay "Sureshot" from an early stage
Was SO much more of a bastard. Lied to Gill constantly, didn't care about anything but the money, etc.
Had aggressive hand tremors alongside Jay's night terrors ○ Gill cures it with lay on hands
When he gets drunk married, they talk extensively about how he'd be released when he's dead. Welp.
They did actually break up and it was fine and they were still friends. They parted on good terms
Is really fucking good at chess ○ Beat Earl twice and Jay once. Jay had a point of exhaustion after a nightmare but Earl had no excuse ○ Lost to Gillion though, but only cause of prophetic screwup ○ This kid is smarter than he lets on, y'all
Was the first one to have a backstory dump while Jay is asking him about the Black Rose Pirates, yet still we know jack shit about his life before them other than "orphan"
Gill
Charlie has referred to Gillion with 'they' many times. I can pull receipts.
When describing Gill, Charlie said: "He's more.. elven, if you had to make a comparison. 'Cause I don't wanna be a fish guy". Oh, honey.
Smote a bald person by using his hair as a whip (ep. 4)
Was given anxiety and self-doubt alongside jay's night terrors and chip's tremors ○ "What do you want?" "I want the feeling of satisfaction I've been chasing my whole life." ○ This was episode FIVE.
First mention of the prophecy and how Gillion wasn't their ideal student is ep. 7, after he divine smites + prophetic screwups and deals like 60 damage to some beetles ○ Chip spends the next 30 seconds in gay awe
He refers to the crescent moon Niklaus tattoo as "my zodiac" (probably a bit) ○ It's not a lil basic white girl moon this thing is the entire size of his forearm
Gill had never heard about the Black Sea - it's unclear if the Undersea just don't know, or if that's just how sheltered he was (ep. 10)
Biz: "What would Gillion do. If he just had no goal - was just sitting there." "Gillion always has a goal." "Would his goal ever be to just.. Sit there?" "Absolutely not." ○ Later, Chip expresses that he doesn't know what Gillion likes. What he would want out of winning a bet. Gillion doesn't have an answer
Other
Apple, in a couple of early battles, acted like Gill's familiar (see: ep. 7)
They also pecked at his Niklaus tramp stamp and looked all confused at the idea of eating seeds
The specific crescent of the moon in the Niklaus tattoo is known as a symbol of "corruption" (ep. 9) and its antonym is the sun, for "life", similar to the yin and yang ○ Interesting to consider after what the tree said in 110 <_<
Pretzel has a masters degree in couple's therapy (ep. 10)
The Albatross/Millennium Chipper was described as the colour of rosewood or mahogany
Captain Lizzie's first introduction was a wanted poster, and Chip wanted to turn her in for the prize, then decided to try learn from her instead
Chip/Bizly called Old Man Earl "Erol" for a loooong time ○ Maybe it's an accent thing but I have an uncle called Erol and so this stands out to me
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