#I hope it's not too obvious with this post that I don't play nearly enough video games

[rivalsforlife]

Sorry I saw joker p5 and I have to ramble. His case is so weird because imo he has so much more personality than the last two protags and the game is better for it, and you can see what they were going for, to the point where I sometimes even expected him to speak lmao but it never happens (in full sentences). And it's like. He's so well characterized that it's distracting when he's shoved into the dialogue-choice box for every single game. I want them to set him free. Still love him a lot tho

I haven't played p3 yet (watched a playthrough several years ago) but yeah joker definitely has more personality even within some of the dialogue options you could make. plus anime cutscene stuff. but it genuinely threw me off after the akechi boss fight when he has this "long" internal monologue (like five dialogue boxes) about how he was wondering if akechi was alright and if they were going to keep their promise to duel again and stuff like that because we DON'T get to see him think for himself all that much.

near the beginning of the game before you get morgana you have the option to sit on the sofa in the attic and he'll think a little bit for himself but then after you do get morgana when you sit on the couch morgana will just say his thoughts instead. and that really was a letdown for me.

it is a weird thing with persona I've been thinking about. he's not a protagonist like phoenix who is telling his story and you're just along for the ride. but it's also not like, say, pokemon or something, where You Are The Protagonist, pretty much completely, where your character is customizable to yourself and you also don't say anything the entire time. with persona you can name the guy after yourself but he's also got a bit of his own defined backstory but not enough for him to be his own guy entirely separate from the player.

like if I were to write a fanfic - AA is obviously something I'd find easy to write fanfiction about, and I have a concept of Phoenix in my mind as a character that I don't feel is more influenced by my own personal experience compared to other characters like Edgeworth or Maya. I wouldn't be able to write fanfic about something like Pokemon, or at least nothing containing the protagonist, because the protagonist doesn't really exist as a character and is just a vessel for the player to enjoy the story, and their character is entirely personal experience.

p5 joker has enough of a personality that he's clearly Not Me and has enough relationships with the other characters that it would be feasible for me to write a fanfic involving him, but it would be hard to do anything particularly interesting for his character because so much of it is up to personal interpretation and my canon purist tendencies are too bad to overlook that. like so many aspects of his life including his relationships with his friends is ultimately down to the player's decision. I would struggle to figure out how to write his voice when he has so few options where he can Speak His Own Mind or whatever. or like what a conversation between him and another character would be like that isn't completely one-sided. and I'd have absolutely no idea how to tell if anything would be in character for him! if that makes sense. that's where I keep getting stuck on with him where he's clearly so important and significant to the other characters but also while there being not enough there for me to really recognize why him in particular.

(which you could do interesting stuff conceptually with I'm sure but in game it comes off as odd sometimes. hey we've talked five times and it was mostly my own monologue. let me trauma dump in the bath to you.)

like you said there's something there that he could work in a story that like AA would have the protagonist as a fully realized character. and I would like to see that. it's the weird blend of actual character and self-insert that catches me off guard. I get why, it's a video game, but still.

[skzoologist]

Hidden flaws

word count: ~2.4k

warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, arguments

summary: Nobody is perfect, and emotions help highlight those flaws.

a/n: I know this isn't the best I had written and most probably not what any of you expected, but I wanted to show that Bae has his flaws too, that he isn't all those wonderful things he shows to everyone. I hope you guys will still enjoy reading this drabble nonetheless.

Back to the masterlist

Please let me know if I left a warning or anything out, I will add it in! Reblogs, likes and feedback are greatly appreciated!

!I don't condone anyone stealing my work and posting it anywhere without my permission, or feeding it to AI!

!This is just fiction, my interpretation of Stray Kids. By no means is this how they are and how they behave in real life!

·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙·͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙⁺˚•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙˚⁺‧͙

A heavy sigh left his chest, his shoulders sagging in temporary relief as the hefty bag was gently thrown into the corner. The door let out a soft click as it closed shut behind his exhausted form, something that only hunched over more as he’d noticed how a certain few pairs of shoes were chaotically thrown in the way. He knew which pair belonged to who, of course he did, and that only heightened his frustrations as he had already asked them several times to not do this.

But no matter. He was way too tired to deal with this right now.

The place was fairly quiet, save for some gentle murmurs of far-away conversations and the occasional shouts of Felix and Jeongin, who were most probably playing some kind of video game against each other -if the cursing was anything to go by, that is-.

And so Bae simply stood there for the next few minutes, drinking in the quite rare moment of silence after a particularly hectic day of work, even though every muscle and tendon inside his body screamed for rest, to just lay down and not move for the next 12 hours. He listened to the passing vehicles down below, the gentle tip-tapping of the water droplets as they hit the windows, of the continuous shuffling of fabric from everyone’s rooms down the hallway.

With each familiar sound his shoulders relaxed, that deeply-etched line between his eyebrows becoming faded and less visible.

But of course, peace could never last long in that dorm, in the one the nine of them shared.

As Bae moved towards his room to rest, his arm dragging his bag behind on the floor, his shoulder was pushed away so violently he nearly tripped backwards, were it not for the wall to catch his stumbling form.

“Jesus christ, watch where you’re going. I nearly fell because of you.” - one of the youngest spat out, anger and frustration dripping from each word.

The tired idol could only watch Seungmin’s leaving form, all his attention stolen from the lack of honorifics and the form of someone else passing by as he immediately closed his eyes so tightly it looked painful. His lung filled to the brim with another intake of air, this one much more urgent than the last, trapped inside until his veins screamed for release and comfort.

It was fine.

He was fine.

After hauling his bag into his room, his eyes momentarily got caught on the clean, folded clothes he had asked someone to put away. But before he could even fully process that information he had heard shouting from the way he had just come from, the two participants of the heated argument painfully obvious. It wouldn’t have been hard to guess anyway, with the mood Seungmin had just been in.

Sure enough, it only took Bae a few steps to witness that exact member and Changbin looking ready to tear each others’ heads off, a sight rarer than ever.

While Seungmin had always been one to stay calm and jokingly teasing, it was even rarer to see Changbin so ready to fight another member. The gym enthusiast always had a heart of gold, exercising his frustrations out instead of throwing it at any of them.

Both of them were only growing more heated with each passing second, veins visibly jumping underneath their skin with fiery anger. Changbin’s fists were both clenched to the point Bae was sure the skin would break, while Seungmin was biting his lip to the point of drawing blood between each violent word he’d stabbed the shorter male with.

Naturally, this drew the attention of every else in the dorm, each pair of eyes wide in disbelief at what was happening. The sight caused them to freeze, unable to believe that out of everyone, these two were having an actual argument and not just a playful banter they always had instead.

But Bae had been there before them by a few minutes, having already witnessed it all, and thus he was able to force his body to move, to act, his hands pushing at the arguing duo’s chests firmly. Two pairs of vicious eyes zeroed in on his form, yet only one’s owner spoke up.

“And what the fuck do you think you’re doing?! You can barely stand, for fuck’s sake! You come back late, you don’t know anything that happened, and yet you dare get between us? You always do this, playing the peacemaker in this group, as if you’re some kind of goody-two-shoes. You’re such a faker!”

It was silent after Seungmin’s words, the entire atmosphere turning chilly and dangerous. Changbin immediately backed down as if he was scorched, Bae’s hand now uselessly lifted in the air and staying completely still, until it returned to his side and clenched into a fist. Still, it was unable to fully conceal the swirling emotions residing deep within his chest, everything that had happened that day, that week, now desperately trying to spill to the top and consume him alive, injuring not only him in the process, but others as well.

A droplet of blood slithered down the cracks of his skin while nobody dared to move, the uttered words hanging in the air, letting their owner realise their meaning as they dug deeply into everyone’s skin like a vicious parasite.

“Seungmin-” “No, Chan. It’s okay. He’s right. In his eyes, I am what he just called me as.” “No, Bae-”

It all happened in an instant.

In one moment, Bae was standing between Seungmin and Changbin, Chan just far enough to not be able to prevent what was to come. Because in the next moment, Seungmin laid on the floor, dishevelled and panicked as Bae loomed above him, an unconcealed rage filling his once kind eyes. Bae’s chest burned with each intake, veins on the verge of bursting from the sudden added pressure and he was sure he would be chipping a tooth if he continued clenching his jaw as hard as he had been doing so far.

But he couldn’t stop himself anymore. It was all too much. All reason was thrown out the window after that comment, something that dug deeper than Seungmin would have ever thought it would.

He’d stepped on a lion’s tail, and now he had to face the consequences.

Bae’s chest heaved violently, his heart hidden inside thumping so fast it was a wonder how it had remained in its rightful place. That vicious, disgustingly familiar feeling gripped at his throat, nearly choking him to death if he didn’t let it out.

In a blink his arm moved to grip the younger’s hoodie better, shouting breaking out around him. The boy in his grip, locked underneath him, looked like a deer caught in headlights, his entire being shaken down to its core.

Bae hated that look. Hated whenever someone looked at him that way, those wide, fearful eyes haunting him in his nightmares relentlessly. He hated how Seungmin visibly shrank in on himself when one of his hands moved, a breath caught in his throat from the sheer fear, even though it wasn’t a movement fueled by violence. Bae hated how those eyes glistened, hated how that revolting feeling inside him writhed in delight at the sight, but out of everything, he hated the most how Seungmin thought he would actually hurt him.

He hated how even that wasn’t enough to cool himself off, the need to move around and destroy still resided inside besides that deep hurt, begging to take control.

So, with a silent exhale, he stood up and wordlessly went to the door, not answering anyone’s questions as only a silent click could be heard behind him.

He’d heard Chan explaining to the others what had happened as he was leaving, the older aussie being the person who had helped Bae keep his anger issues in check easier. Because as calm and collected as he could look, Bae was only a human with countless flaws. And this one, this one had to be his least favourite. He’d gotten better at controlling it over the years of being an idol, but he couldn’t get rid of it. At one point, this bubbling anger would always break onto the surface, burning everyone around him.

And he never failed to dread that moment.

That was how he always found himself in the gym, the punching bag taking all his frustrations and anger away slowly with each punch, his head feeling calmer and emptier. It was how he had gotten into regularly exercising, actually, the act being his much needed anchor.

Because even after all those words, all the days’ frustrations as he filmed countless scenes and practised certain moves over and over again, he would rather die than hurt one of the members, people who had become his family.

“Hey.”

Changbin’s soft voice was a sudden change, something that Bae wasn’t expecting and so his next punch missed, the bag hitting his body instead and causing him to nearly fall to the ground.

“Hey, hey, I gotcha. Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you like that.” - the younger male said, helping Bae gather his balance once more. “No, it’s okay.”

It was a bit awkward after that, none of them uttering a single word, merely shuffling in place or fixing their clothes. Bae of course knew why his dongsaeng was there, it couldn’t have been more obvious. Changbin’s eyes looked everywhere but at him, no matter how hard Bae had tried.

A heavy sigh left the younger’s lips, eyes finally meeting Bae’s with a heavy gaze, yet no words accompanied them.

A droplet of sweat glided down the taller’s skin as he closed his eyes, a silent sigh leaving his form.

“It’s okay. I heard Chan hyung explaining things after I left, and the younger ones had to know about it sooner or later.” - Bae said, his voice softer than he had hoped for. “But-” “No buts, Bin, it’s okay. And it wasn’t your fault either. I just… didn’t have the best day. I apologise, truly.” “You aren’t completely right, Hyung. Comeback season is on our necks and this time around, you have the most work put onto your shoulders. Every day you come back past midnight, looking like a zombie, and yet you keep doing chores around the dorm as well. You shouldn’t need to come back to such a scene on top of that, where two of us are fighting, especially when I know how you can be.”

Bae could merely blink down at his younger friend, not having expected that at all.

“Oh come on, say something, don’t just blink at me with those pretty eyes of yours!”

A faint red dusted Bae’s ears at those words, smacking Changbin’s shoulder in return.

“But what was that about anyway?” “You mean the argument? Oh, well… We just haven't really seen eye-to-eye with each others’ performances lately. I… I kept criticising every line he sang, and in return, he kept doing the same with my rap. It all bursted out when I mentioned how he should redo a few lines tomorrow.”

Bae didn’t need to say anything, he could see how Changbin had already reflected over his actions. Regret was clearly written on his face, a slight frown always sitting on his pouty lips. And those deep, dark eyes of his told entire tales of the same thing, and thus, Bae just stood beside him silently.

“Don’t look at me like that, Hyung! I know I fucked up, okay? I shouldn’t be this harsh on him, but I just. I just want him to do his very best, y’know? Because I know he can. He’s our main vocalist, and this track suits him so well.” - Changbin’s voice turned so tender near the end that it almost broke Bae’s heart, because he understood it all.

He also wanted the others to do their very best, to encourage them and help them become that new, best version of themselves. Everyone wanted that from the other, and sometimes that want turned into something hurtful, as regretful as it was.

“Anyway, come on, let’s go so we can both apologise to him, yeah? I would hate for him to go to sleep like this, to actually believe the stupid things I accidentally threw at him.”

With Bae’s silent nod the two were off, the short journey back to their dorms passing in silence. Both males were stressing over their apologies, which words to say that would earn them forgiveness. But deep down Bae feared that he wouldn’t ever be forgiven, his actions harsh and unlike him when his anger took the reins. He knew that all too well. After all, that was the reason why he always went to hide away at the gym at such times.

His stomach churned and rolled around with each step, and much too soon, they were at the door already. Neither of them reached for the handle, as they just stood there, hesitant.

Much too suddenly the door swung open, the person they had least expected standing on the other side, having expected them.

“Come in.” - he said, the two obediently following him into the living room.

It was clear Seungmin had been crying, the skin underneath his eyes scrubbed red and raw. Bae’s heart clenched at the sight, that deep-rooted self hatred only burying itself deeper into his chest. There was a lump growing inside his throat, and he knew that if he were to just stand there, he would be unable to say anything later.

“I’m sorry, Seungmin.” - he whispered out, his voice nearly breaking from hidden emotion.

He turned away to leave, that familiar burning appearing behind his eyes, but something held him back. A quick glance told him that it was Seungmin himself, his small hand peeking out from his sweater paws. A habit he only practised when he was feeling upset.

“No, Hyung, stay. Please.” - the boy whispered out, tugging at his sleeve once more with such desperation that Bae couldn’t deny, even as a stray tear rolled down his skin.

And so the three stayed in the living room over warm cups of tea and ramyeon, talking everything out. Although the damage had been done, scars could heal if looked after properly; and none of them were planning to leave.

[staycalmandhugaclone]

You'll Have to Go Through Me (Hidden Scene)

Part (7) of You'll Have to Go Through Me, the next arc of Doc's Misadventures! If you're new, start at the beginning with Touch Starved!

So... shortly after I made that posting requesting Unhinged Asks, I got a bit caught up with this scene. Loads of things happen outside of Doc's viewpoint that I know about, but y'all don't, and I felt like this was worthy of it's own mini chapter. (Plus, it's been too long since I've written Echo) - gonna go play with all your fun prompts now! Thank you!!

also, this was written mostly on my phone at night when I couldn't sleep, soooo apologies if it reads a bit different, I guess?

Warnings: Just some standard guilt, angst, and regret, along with a little sprinkling of profanity.

WC: 1,172

She hadn’t seen him. Crosshair had needed only that split-second flash of black cloth stark against pale skin as Echo ducked behind a tree, but the woman beside him had merely kept walking forward in obvious ignorance to the arc’s presence. He so nearly ignored the man, but some relentless annoyance, a nagging thought that had tormented him since those words left her lips forced him to fall back, encouraging her to continue on with a teasing quip before retreating into the blessedly dim halls of the Marauder.

“Don’t tell Echo what I did.”

His lips twitched into the beginnings of a snarl as that broken plea reverberated through the silence, hands clenching into fists against the way his chest twisted, revolting from the consuming shame he’d failed to chase from her tormented eyes. Suppressing that ache that he refused to call guilt beneath the familiar veil of anger, the slender clone leaned against the durasteel wall near the bunkroom door, hand thoughtlessly bringing a toothpick to his lips in the vain hope that it might offer some fleeting distraction as his gaze settled on the open ramp before him; waiting.

There was a heavy resignation in the droop of his shoulders as Echo finally entered the ship, brow just taut enough to hint at a crease. He stopped after taking only a few strides into the cabin, allowing himself a mere handful of seconds before turning to meet Crosshair’s narrowed eyes.

“Felt like gloating some more?” Whatever guilt threatened to haunt him at the nearly hopeless defeat vainly hidden with feigned impatience in Echo's scowled greeting vanished as the memory of that quiet request struck him once more. He said nothing for a long moment, arms looped across his chest as he seemed to be sizing up the older man.

“If I wanted to do that, I would have dragged her in here with me.” He retorted, knowing the image of him pressing their coveted medic flush against the metallic walls would only send the arc further into that torturous spiral.

“Then what the hell do you want, Crosshair?!” He finally growled, hands clenched into fists as his entire body tensed.

“Figured it was time someone told you to quit moping about.” He answered, purposefully tilting his head back to look down at his newest brother. “She’s got enough to deal with without worrying about whether or not you hate her now.” The flash of wounded horror on Echo’s face rekindled that flush of guilt, but the dread that darkened his brother’s eyes gave him pause. It took only a beat for understanding to wash over him, and his arms slowly fell to his sides.

“Who told you?” he asked, voice dropping into something just shy of a whisper as though there were still some point to maintaining an air of secrecy. Body deflating beneath a deep, mournful exhale, Echo looked toward him with an almost desperate regret.

“Tech.” He answered quietly before letting his gaze fall. “She… dammit, she shouldn't have…” His voice failed  him, breath too near breaking to risk anything more. Crosshair pulled the sliver of wood from his lips, gaze blindly watching it roll between his fingers as he let his own guilt rob him of that façade of anger.

“You think she'd be any better off if she just stood back and let them take you?” He asked, but there was no venom in words that could so easily have been filled with malice and blame. Still, Echo's eyes slid closed beneath a weariness the sniper knew too well, weighted by the futility of a regret neither could fix with useless if-only's.

“Doesn't matter…” Cross muttered with a sigh. “It’s done, and you avoiding her like this is only making things harder.” A glint of that earlier annoyance returned to his sharp gaze.

“I know.” Echo barely whispered the broken murmur, head hanging to his chest. There was no gentle comfort in the seconds of quiet that lingered between them, but the sympathy Crosshair couldn't help but feel silenced further rebukes.

“What's your plan?” he asked instead. Echo let out a deep breath, gaze shifting to stare blindly at the paneling above them.

“Probably something stupid.” Despite the tension filling the small room, Cross let out a huffed chuckle, lips just twisting into a smirk.

“Watch yourself, arc.” He warned, but the warmth in his raspy voice robbed whatever threat might have otherwise sharpened the retort, and Echo responded with a half-hearted grin of his own.

Shoulders rolling to ease the residual stiffness from his muscles, Crosshair slipped the rifle from his back and set it carefully in its case before thoughtlessly beginning the process of stripping himself of his armor.

“You coming?” He asked once his gear was safely tucked away. Echo's jaw tensed, gaze shifting to the door just behind him.

“Not yet.” The unspoken plea in his words, the guilt laced through a sorrow the hardened soldier made no effort to hide was enough to still whatever sharp insult bated on Crosshair’s tongue. “Tonight.” He offered by way of some forced compromise. “I'll talk with her tonight… just… I need a little more time.”

Cross said nothing, fighting back the initial urge to bully the man onto complying if only to avoid the look he knew he'd see in Doc's eyes the instant she realized he wasn't there, but the devastation was still too raw in Echo’s voice for even him to dismiss it. Slipping the toothpick back between his teeth, Cross turned toward his supply crate once more and pulled the skintight shirt smoothly over his head. His brother looked at him with something dancing between confusion and skepticism, but he merely tossed the fabric onto the lid of his tote before starting toward the ramp.

“Figure I'll give her something else to think about if you’re still too chicken-shit to look at her.” Even Echo couldn't help but scoff at the haughty boast, stunned into silence just long enough for his brother to reach the sand.

“Crosshair.” He finally called, forcing some hint of a smile on his lips as the tall man glanced back to him. “Take care of her.” There was something more to that feigned order, some trace of denial that even the arc couldn't let himself acknowledge.

“I don't need you to tell me that.” The snarl that just touched his words withered as their eyes met, and Crosshair remembered how useless he'd felt watching Doc break as Wrecker held her through the night. “I'm trying.” His gaze fell as the strained words flitted past tense lips, and neither spoke again as the depth of his own insecurities threatened to drown him.

When he finally looked back up, he wasn't surprised to see the arc mirroring his own uncertainty. With a knowing nod Echo turned, vanishing into the ship. Fingers tensing in and out of an nervous fist, Crosshair hesitated just a moment longer before releasing a short breath and beginning the long trek to the beach.

Next Chapter

(Btw, I did my first series of trimming down the taglist today. Those still included, thanks for all of your support and love!! And if I overlooked someone who still wants to be included, feel free to let me know!

- Also, anyone that's filled out the form and isn't getting tagged, that's because Tumblr won't let me tag you... apologies, but I don't know why or how to fix it.

Click here or message me if you'd like to be added to a taglist!

Click here for my Masterlist.

Taglist: @arctrooper69 @eclec-tech @kixs-husband @jennrosefx @echos-girlfriend @starqueensthings @manofworm @merkitty49 @idoubleswearimawriter @abigfanofstarwars @chopper-base @daftdarling222 @pb-jellybeans @bacta-the-future @rosechi @legalpadawan @drummergirl1701 @6oceansofmoons @dangraccoon @ji5hine @dathomiri-mudpuppy @mooncommlink @isthereanechoinhere96 @inneedoffanfics @totally-not-your-babe @delialeigh @blondie-bluue @ray-rook @iabrokengirl @arcsimper5 @rndmpeep @amorfista @wanderneverlost @flawsandgoodintent @passionofthesith @followthepurrgil @roam-rs @foodmoneyandcats @savebytheodoresnonjosestuff @9902sgirl

[contentloadingandstuff]

Keqing NSFW Headcanons? If you're taking requests ^^

NSFW Headcanons - Keqing & Yoimiya

A/N: Hello anons! Thank you for your requests, and as always, I hope you enjoy. Also, I'm posting this from mobile (god I hate it so much), so it may come out funny-looking.

CW: Male!Reader, Sub!Keqing, Sub!Yoimiya, masochism and bdsm stuff (like whipping and spanking).

Nsfw under the cut, if mobile will allow it.

Keqing

She is known for her one-track mind and stellar work ethic, but even the greatest of minds will sometimes get distracted. When she finds her hand messing around under her skirt or the heat pooling in her stomach to be too much to handle on her own - that’s where you come into play. 

It might be hard to believe, but Keqing is an actual human with human needs.

But she is still a busy woman, so quickies will be the more common sessions. You know, to get her mind straight. But you'll get to enjoy longer sessions as well. 

When she was alone, Keqing had to use toys to satisfy her urges, and she collected a lot of them over the years. 

In her secret box of fun you will find dildos of various shapes, sizes and materials (she even has a tentacle-shaped one!), butt plugs, grinders, vibrators and nipple clamps. She will obviously purchase new ones once you start fucking. 

Those new acquisitions will include mainly cuffs, collars, whips and paddles - anything to help you turn her into a whining, abused mess. 

You see, Keqing is absolutely the dominant one in your relationship, but she assumes a very submissive and obedient role in bed. 

All of those distractions of body and mind are best removed with some merciless abuse of her bound form. 

You established a list of things you can and can't do to each other. Aside from the obvious, Keqing doesn't want to get any hickeys or bruises on her neck or face. Talking about what's happening in the bed outside the privacy of your own home is strictly prohibited as well. 

Because if anyone was to hear about the kinky shit she indulges in, her reputation would be ruined. 

Oh, and DO NOT cum inside. Ever.

The woman lets go of all the appearances and facades she puts up. You'll get to hear her whine, beg and cry without a care in the world. 

Keqing is a masochist, as pain is nearly as powerful of a stimulant as pleasure for her. To make sure she enjoys every session, she created a set of rules for you to follow. 

Rule 1: Go all out on her pussy and ass, no matter how loud her screaming may be. At most she'll pass out, but don't let that stop you. If anything, that will let you enjoy her holes in peace and quiet. 

Rule 2: Care only about the safe word. Don't listen to any of her screaming, pleading, calling for help or crying. 

Speaking of… Rule 3: Make her weep. Doesn't matter if it is from immense pain, unbearable pleasure or extreme emotions - if she cried, the session was a good one. 

And how to break her up to that point? Simple - spanking, whipping, edging or post orgasm will do. 

Before you do anal, Keqing wants a proper preperation. That means a thorough spanking and a small, dry dildo that will rough up her tight hole nicely. When you finally enter her, lubed up just enough for you (and only you) to be comfortable, she'll probably cry out in pain. You might want to stuff her soaked panties down her throat to keep neighbours from complaining. 

You can whip her tits, back or ass cheeks until first blood (or the safeword ofc). Keqing loves it when you are cruel, and pull out the single strand whip. Especially against her soft ass. 

A leather whip assaulting her butt + an anal hook (dry of course) to keep her bent over + a bullet vibe strapped to her clit, on the highest setting + a spreader bar + a blindfold = a very happy Keqing. It takes a lot of time to set up, but the pay off is immense. 

When the smoke clears and the dust settles, Keqing will want to do lots of aftercare. Not for her, tho. 

She understands that hurting her might make you feel awful sometimes, even if you're into it. She will tell you that all of it was consensual, and she really enjoyed all of it. Keqing will assure you that nothing you said or did to her will affect your relationship outside of sex in any negative way. 

Okay, now that she assured you… can you pass the aloe balm? She can't really get up… 

You're quite good at it, and her body needs a few days to recover. When it does… you'll indulge her again, won't you? 

"I c-can't… a-anymore - AH! - I-I… m-m-mercy, please!"

Yoimiya

Yoimiya lives to have fun and relax. Whether it be making fireworks, playing with kids, or banging - the girl will pursue whatever makes her feel all warm and fuzzy inside. 

Once she knows you're comfortable with physical intimacy, she'll get handsy pretty quick. 

Yoimiya always liked physical contact, so she'll always want to have your hand on her, or vice versa. She enjoys your body, and shows it with a lot of touching. It will be tame in public, just holding your waist or forearm. But when the doors close, she'll be all over you. 

Not one part above your knees will be left neglected. Yoimiya will play with and lick or suck every inch of skin she gets access to, with special emphasis on your chest and stomach. She especially loves teasing your nipples and watching you gasp in pleasure. 

Your cock will be enveloped by her warm throat with little to no delay. Yoi will throat you until she runs out of breath. While she recovers, her tongue will keep your head happy with some slow frenulum licks, all while she looks you in the eyes. But once her breath is back, she's diving right back in. 

When you push them down for some throat fucking, most girls would desperately search for something to hold on to. Yoimiya is not like most girls. She'll keep her hands neatly tucked away under her ass like the good girl she is, letting you do whatever you want to her. 

Good girl? No. Yoimiya is the best girl. 

She likes bondage quite a lot, but, to be fair, you don't really need to tie her down at any point. She is really obedient, obeying whatever order you give her. Stay? Sit? Suck? Bend over? She is on the case!

That said, she has an unusual little quirk to her. For her, touching your bodies (or even using your mouths) or binding her is not inherently sexual. 

She likes when you massage her boobs while cuddling, or suck her nipples to sleep. These areas are sensitive, but they aren't immediately arousing if she's not thinking about it. 

Yoimiya finds comfort in being tied up. She feels very secure in your presence. The girl likes to nap with her hands cuffed or tied, head resting on your lap while you do your thing (read a book, watch TV or go through your phone). 

Most people subconsciously hold or touch their intimate areas when they feel safe*, but Yoi takes it a step further. She likes holding your balls whenever you cuddle or sleep. Sure, it was distracting at first, but after a few months of this you got used to her touch. 

Yoimiya just loves the fact that you let her hold and touch your most intimate and precious bit. It really makes her heart flutter when she lies next to your relaxed form, nuts in her gentle grip. 

She feels that there's little need for toys when there's a rock-hard, thick cock to keep her busy. 

Daddy kink for sure. If you're not comfortable with being called that, she'll use other honorifics, most prominently 'sir'. 

Yoimiya pretty much won the genetic lottery with her body. Her entire flesh is soft, and her skin is very pleasant to touch. She has a pair of sizable, squeezable tits, a medium but round butt and meaty thighs. Her pussy has plumper outer lips that press so nicely against your cheeks when you go down on her. 

Whether it be with oral, vaginal, anal, thigh jobs, tit fucks or hotdogging - she hopes you use all of her assets well! 

Her favorite position? Anything, really. As long as you can see each others' faces. There is nothing hotter than seeing you panting, mouth agape and completely entranced with her wet hole. She likes to keep that delicious eye contact as well!

Yoi keeps her pussy neat and clean, but she likes to see a trimmed bush of hair on your manhood. It feels really nice to nuzzle into while you're balls-deep in her throat. 

"I need your cock, daddy! Please fuck me! Please please please please please!"

* It has been scientifically proven that fondling with these areas (beasts for women, testicles for men) releases a hormone known as oxitocine, which is responsible for relaxing the body. It also releases while sleeping or cuddling.

Quite the fun fact, isn't it?

Thanks for reading!

[babybatscreationsv2]

Upskirt ch5

Marvel | Starker

Someone has been taking pictures up Peter's skirt when he's not looking and poor Peter has found their blog.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Warnings and tags below

Warnings/tags: upskirt pics, romnoncon, teacher/student, public sex, cock warming, humiliation, cum play, femboy!Peter

The pictures.

Good god, the pictures.

There he was, bent at the waist, standing between the desks at the back of the room. It couldn't have been more obvious that he was a student, if it wasn't already clear from Tony's posts. There was a shot showing off his long legs and the hint of his bulge underneath his skirt. Then closer where you could see underneath and you could tell he'd been dripping. The last one was of his bare ass, cheeks spread with one of Mr. Stark's hands, hole wet with is cum.

The little slut just couldn't resist, his caption read. Fairly tame compared the comments.

What a waste of cum, you should have bred that bitch

They always come around eventually, sluts know what they're good for

Whats the location? I want to try that hole for myself

Peter licked his lips. Some little part of him wished Mr. Stark would tell them. He wished someone would recognize him on the subway and take advantage. None of them could be as hot as his teacher, but that was almost better. Getting groped and used by men he would never actually want to touch him. Maybe it would make Mr. Stark jealous.

He was so busy reading through the blog that he was late making it onto the subway. He nearly missed it altogether. He squeezed himself in through the doors as they began to close, mumbling an apology as he tried to find a place to stand. In the corner of his eye he spotted something much better than a place to stand. A place to sit.

Mr. Stark had managed to nab a seat by the door. He was looking through his phone and likely hadn't noticed Peter yet. It was too perfect. If the man was going to try to tease him to death, two could play that game.

Peter pushed his way forward and sat right in the man's lap. He felt the man jolt, but eager hands found his thighs almost instantly. Peter's skirt was short enough that his whole ass was against the man's crotch with only his panties against his slacks.

"Hope you don't mind, sir," Peter said over his shoulder.

"It's no trouble, sweetheart. This seat was open after all." His hand slipped up Peter's skirt and his fingers brushed his cock through his panties. Peter swallowed. That is not what was supposed to happen. He moved his hips, grinding down against his teacher's lap. He heard a quiet moan in his ear and it made him grin.

As the train moved along and the rest of crowd stared at their phones, no one noticed Peter grinding on his teacher's lap. Or the way Mr. Stark was openly stroking him through his panties.

"Look at you. What a whore you've become," Mr. Stark said into his ear.

"You started this," Peter gasped in answer.

"Oh you're blaming me are you? As if you wouldn't bend over for any man in front of you."

Peter rocked his hips a little more pointedly, holding on to the man's thighs. He could feel him getting hard in his slacks. He grinned, imagining how he'll have to cover himself to walk into the high school.

A hand pulled him back against his teacher's chest while the other rubbed the inside of his thigh. He didn't let it deter him from his goal of making his teacher maddeningly horny.

"Do you think this is going to get you what you want, Peter?"

Peter smirked. That hand on his thigh was hungry and his cock was so hard against his ass. "I dunno, sir. Should I stay after school again?"

Mr. Stark's beard scraped across his neck making him gasp. His lips sucked just beneath the hinge of his jaw. "I have a lot of tests to grade this afternoon. I could use the company."

Peter pulled himself away as the subway stopped. He finished the walk to school, buzzing with excitement. He had to fuck him now, there was no way he wouldn't. The idea swirled around his head throughout the day, making the hours pass like minutes until he was finally sitting beside Mr. Stark's desk waiting for the teacher to return.

The school was so quiet he could hear his own heart racing. Then finally the classroom door opened and his teacher entered. He looked much more put together than Peter would have liked. It was too bad he'd had all day to calm himself down.

Neither of them spoke as Mr. Stark crossed the room to stand over his desk. Peter slowly stood and pressed himself against his teacher's chest. His hands held his face as he bent his head to kiss him. Peter moaned, pressing up on his toes to get more. Mr. Stark's hands left his face to squeeze his ass. His brain felt melty and good and he just wanted more. More of whatever Mr. Stark wanted to do to him.

He stopped kissing him and examined his face. Peter was so far gone he didn't even have him to feel embarrassed but he knew his face was red with want and his pupils were wide and his lips were kiss swollen and he looked like a slut.

"I have a job for you," he teacher said.

Peter nodded. "Okay," he answered, mind hazy.

"Okay?"

"Yes, sir," he tried again. He bit his bottom lip.

Mr. Stark smiled. "Good boy."

He pulled him along to the desk at the back of the room. When he pushed gently on his shoulders, Peter fell eagerly to his knees. His eyes locked on to the bulge in his crotch and he licked his lips.

"You see something you want?"

Peter nodded again. "Yes, sir."

"Good. Because I have papers to grade and you owe me extra credit."

"Huh?" Peter blinked his eyes, trying to understand.

Mr. Stark sat down in his chair. Peter watched as he unzipped his panted and pulled out his cock. He crawled forward on his knees, mouth hanging open, but his teacher stopped him.

"Under the desk."

Peter crawled underneath and Mr. Stark pulled up his chair. The little space under the desk felt cramped, but it was hardly noticeable as Mr. Stark reached down and guided his head forward. He opened his mouth wide, shivering as the head of his cock touched his tongue. He moaned, sucking eagerly on the head.

"There you go. You keep my cock happy while I work. If you do a good job I'll let you pick where I cum when I'm finished."

Peter hummed his agreement, unwilling to stop now that he had what he wanted. He slowly bobbed his head, taking it a little deeper each time. He could head Mr. Stark's pen scratching above as if he weren't even there. He loved it. He took as much of his cock as he could without gagging and stayed there with the head of his cock just nudging the back of his throat. He let his head rest on his teacher's thigh while he lightly sucked.

A knock on the door made his jump. A hand grabbed his head before he could pull back.

"Come in."

Peter's heart raced. Had he been expected someone? This was way too risky. At least on the subway no one knew who they were.

"Hey, Stark. Just coming to get that projector." Peter paled. He knew that voice. That was his history teacher, Mr. Rogers.

"She's all yours," Mr. Stark said. "I'm glued to the desk for the next hour at least."

Peter tracked the sound of his footsteps as he crossed the room. The projector was in the corner, but if he came too close to the desk he would see Peter underneath for sure. "Gotta love test days," Mr. Rogers huffed. Peter heard the wheels rolls as he pushed the projector away.

"By the way, have you seen Peter lately?"

Mr. Stark stiffed. "What about him?"

Mr. Rogers chuckled. "That skirt he's been wearing. There's no way that's dress code."

"Funny how no one says anything," Mr. Stark laughed.

"He needs it bad doesn't he? Think I should try my luck?" Peter almost choked. They really did talk about him.

"Oh, I think he'd be receptive." He couldn't even deny it. In fact, he went back to sucking by way of answer.

"His grades have been slipping lately, maybe I'll keep him after school some time soon."

"I hear he's been busy after school."

"Have you? What did you hear?"

"I'll tell you all about it later."

It was quiet for a second, then Mr. Roger's scoffed. "Yeah, right. You're just jacking off to him like the rest of us. Caught a view up that skirt the other day while he was bending over. Did you know he wears these tight panties, practically a thong with how that round ass sucks them up."

"We aught to team up, teach the boy a lesson." Peter shivered. He almost moaned.

"You think so?"

"Oh yeah. The boy needs discipline and who better to teach him than his two favorite teachers?"

Mr. Roger's groaned. "You know he'd let us bend him right over and spank him, too."

"He'd let us jack off on his face and send him home like that."

"Fuck. He would wouldn't he?" He took a deep breath. "Alright, we've got work to get back to. But if you do have something to tell me..."

"I'll call you."

"Right. See ya, Stark." Mr. Roger's left the room, wheeling the projector out with him. As soon as the door was shut Mr. Stark reached under the desk and grabbed him by the hair.

"Bet you loved that didn't you, whore?" He pushed the chair back, pulling Peter along with him so he could see his face. "I know you did. I could feel you sucking my cock like you couldn't get enough with we were talking. If only he knew, right?"

He pulled him down on his cock, forcing himself down his throat while Peter sat pliant and willing. He let his teacher use his mouth feeling ever more cock drunk as spit ran over his chin.

"Better tell me where you want it or its going down your throat," he groaned. He pulled him back by his hair. Peter stared up at him with glassy eyes, barely aware of anything except how good he felt.

"Oh my face please Mr Stark," he moaned.

"Fuck," his teacher moaned. He stroked his cock with a fistful of Peter's spit and quickly came. It was hot sticky on his face, splattering on his forehead, his right eye, running down his cheek. "Don't move."

Peter sat still though his longed to rock his hips. His cock ached. He'd never needed to cum so badly. He lips his lips and shivered at the taste. Then finally, Mr. Stark wiped the cum from his eye so he could see. He stuffed his finger into Peter's mouth, feeding it to him. Peter let him clean him up that, but his skin still felt sticky and wet. He loved it.

"Please, sir. Can I cum?"

Mr. Stark looked down at him. "In your panties."

Peter nodded. He lifted his skirt with one hand and pressed the over against the front of his panties. He moaned as he rocked his hips, grinding into his palm. It didn't take long and he was moaning as quietly as he could as he came. Some of it leaked through the material, but he just lowered his skirt and let that get sticky too.

"Thank you, sir," he panted.

"So polite. What a good boy." He patted his head. "Run along before your family worries. I'll see you on Monday."

Peter stayed kneeling. He bit his lip.

"What are you waiting for? A kiss?"

Peter nodded.

"I don't kiss whores that are covered in cum, but how about this?" He grabbed Peter's jaw and he opened his mouth. Mr. Stark spat onto his tongue and Peter felt like he was cumming again. He was practically in a daze as he made his way home.

[honey-tongue]

Okay! After rewatching pmmm for the first time in about 10 years, what are my thoughts?

(This will be all over the place and probably really long. Formatting? What's that?)

I'll start with the ending! It's very emotional and bittersweet. It puts enough emphasis to show how major Madoka's wish is. Not in terms of the universe, but in terms of Madoka's existence itself. And everytime she's asked if that's what she truly wants, she's says she's fine with it. Even with her heartbreaking goodbye with Homura.

And the ending tries to be a little ambiguous where this will go. Madoka's hope that Homura will remember her reminds me of Kyoko's hope that she can bring Sayaka back. Granted, Madoka truly hoped for that and wasn't trying to give false hope like Kyubey did. But still! Idk if it was intentional but it's cute! We also see after the credits (I never saw this part :0) was Homura walking to some wraiths and Madoka's aura(?) Telling her to do her best and her little smile is cute. :) Apparently those wings weren't supposed to be there, one of the staff just put them there because it looked cool lol. Anyways! Everything is supposed to be all good now! Right? It seems all good now!

Well... I'm gonna read the wraith arc soon after this and before rewatching Rebellion. (Rebellion will always confuse me lol.) But... I dunno! It wraps up a little TOO nearly, huh? It makes sense why people hated Rebellion and like how it ended. And some people like bittersweet endings, that's fine. But... It just seems a little TOO okay. We all know Homura wasn't really happy. Duh. But she's definitely less cold and she's smiling! That looks good! Kyoko and Mami are alive! That's good! Sayaka got to see the dumb boy play his violin and got some closure! That's good! But, again, this all just seems a little TOO fine. Like, how Madoka felt about how she'll forgotten and only a concept. She's just like "yeah! That's fine! That's okay with me! :D" I can't buy that. Not without that being a front or a result of feeling PUSHED into carrying this heavy burden and combined with her low self esteem and self confidence.

Madoka, like the other girls, was completely exploited. That's just a fact. You'll never make me believe otherwise. No normal person with a good mindset would wish that upon themselves, that doesn't have some form issues within themselves. Not to mention how Kyubey LITERALLY FORCED her into seeing things she didn't want to. You really think it didn't bother her? Just like my post about Sayaka, this dumb cat KNOWS what he's doing. Madoka has a kind heart, obvious she wants peace and goodness for everyone. We see and hear this time and time again, so it really hurts seeing that used by the magical system to try exploiting it for their own gain. And it sucks that this very system, that has caused so much pain, in fighting, abuse, instability, is the way to fix it all. But, I suppose that's how it is in the real world too... Anyway, Madoka was in a vulnerable spot, just as Kyubey wanted. Like he's scripting all of this just to push her. And I just have to emphasize that I don't buy Madoka being fully okay with this. Girl just wanted to be good at something, to give something amazing to this world and she thinks the only way to do that is to become a concept of law. People argue that "she wanted this" and yeah, maybe I'd fall for it too if I had all this information pumped in my head by Kyubey PLUS the whole events of the anime itself with Mami, Sayaka, and Kyoko dying and Homura almost dying.

Oh, my Homura... Babygirl. I'll add that Christina V was SO good at her emotional parts, honestly. It's a good reason to watch the dub! Idek what to say about Homura that I haven't either said irl or liked other people's posts about. But God... The whole ending is about hope. I GET IT. I GET IT. But there was just... It felt so wrong seeing her act okay and I guess that's the point of the darkened eyes at the end, mayhaps? I get how Homura feels selfish now, because even I feel selfish about wanting those two together after seeing how "okay" things are. ;_;

(I GOT DISTRACTED AND STOP TYPING RIP ILL DO MY BEST TO CONTINUE.)

Going away from the ending, Sayaka is such an underrated character oh my God? It felt like she was stealing the show sometimes lol. I don't understand how she's so hated. I mean I do, but I feel people see her wayyy too surface level. I almost started loving her more than Homura! Crazy! Her arc always will break my heart. It's the main reason I didn't rewatch it for so long, it's just so... Depressing and relatable as time goes on. (I first watched in like... 2014ish) Her English VA is so good too! Especially in the quiet moments when her voice is breaking. Ahh

!ALSO I DONT REMEMBER HATING KYUBEY THIS MUCH. Obviously, I didn't like him before, but I don't know if like, life has changed me or anything be I just wanna 😡😡😡 everytime he was on screen after they find out about the soul gems. I will NEVER understand how people can find it in their hearts to sympathize with him after seeing all that he's done to be manipulative. Like, did we watch the same show???

And Kyoko! She doesn't get much screentime but ah! What a doll! I forgot she ever interacted with Madoka! She's so sweet to her despite hardly speaking with her to begin with. Literally every magical girl wants to look out for her and I just 🥺💜💜!!! Honestly, her adamant stance on never wasting food hits harder now that I've actually experienced going without food. I remember not caring much about her when I first watched, but she's so fun! And normal lmao. Probably the least messed up in the cast. And I LOVE the idea of her and Homura having a solid friendship. The way they interact in rebellion and the way they get along in the show is refreshing. I'm sure Homura appreciated not having to babysit her as much as the others.

Overall, this was painful. :) Episode 8 was the most painful one, if I'm being honest. Sayaka breaking down plus Homura's emotional outburst HURT. I kept having to pause from watching it because I just couldn't handle it. Also, because I watched the dub, I didn't get to see something's be translated.

This was when she became a witch and :((( she felt so bad for wanting to be acknowledged. My heart...

Sighhhhh.... But those are my thoughts. Is it just as good as when I watched it? Even better! I feel like as an adult, I understood the concepts and explanations way better and have a better appreciation gift the themes it tackled and the way it was written! I low-key hate it now though because for now, I feel oddly... Bad for wanting Homura to pull Madoka down. I never felt bad about it and now I kind of do? I feel like the "Homura is evil and everything was fine before she interfered" people are infiltrating my brain. Oh no... Well! Time to watch Rebellion after I read the wraith arc. Maybe that will help me not feel so insecure with how I feel.

Also this was really all over the place, I can't seem to fully sit down and write this out like I did with my Sayaka vs Madoka post. My brain is truly a mystery.

[catreginae]

Thou Shalt Not Fall: Opening the Flood gates

Apologies for the long wait! I have ideas but they were super difficult to turn into words! I had to switch perspectives a bunch and restart this chapter several times until I finally got something to stick and even then, it might be too... wordy? I dunno how I feel about this one but I wanted to get it up so I could get into the more episodic chapters. Speaking of chapters, I do have more chapters lined up (one is done and the others are going well enough) so the next update shouldn't take almost three months. Hopefully. Feel free to ask more about the vampire lore I'm going with! Send those asks.

[Previous] - [Next]

View the Master Post Here!

“What do we do now?” Wild asked as Time decided to get off of his back so he could better look for any signs of Warriors calming down.

“We just have to let him work it out of his system.” Hopefully. Truly, Time was guessing based on how he knew Warriors reacted to blood, but he couldn't let them know that. They were depending on him for some direction.

“Time, you have to tell us more,” Legend said. “About all of this.”

Time watched as Warriors continued to writhe on the ground, trying to squirm his way out of the bonds now that Time's weight was no longer holding him down. He continued to hiss, growl, and scream, though thankfully, he was muffled with his scarf. The man had a good pair of lungs and it was even more apparent when Warriors wasn't in control of himself. It was better than when he was throwing furniture at least. He would take the screaming over the trashed room.

He took a deep breath. Warriors blew his secret already. Surely, he wouldn't be mad if Time explained even more.

“How long have you known?” Legend asked when Time didn't respond. He weighed the options in his mind, trying to figure out how much he should tell the rest of the group. He knew they wouldn't settle for nothing but how far could he go before upsetting Warriors?

“I knew Warriors when he was completely Hylian. I was just a child at the time but as you boys know, that doesn't keep you out of an adventure.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow, focusing his attention on Time. “Do you have any adventures that don't involve travelling through time somehow?”

“Nope,” he answered with a light chuckle before Warriors reminded him of why he was talking about their shared past in the first place. “At any rate, the war that Warriors won happened nearly two decades ago for me, but only two years ago for him. As soon we all met up, we caught up and well, it was obvious he was still a vampire. He was changed after defeating the person who started the war but before he faced Ganondorf for the second time.”

At first, Time was disappointed for him. He was hoping in the time they spent separated that they broke the curse and Warriors would be back to normal. He doubted Warriors made peace with his curse and the fact that he was a vampire, at least the way Time saw it. He only seemed interested in meeting the bare minimum of his needs and playing by the rules. Whatever he did with the black blood was really the first time since their group of nine met each other that he seemed to try do something with his powers.

And he wasn't going to look back on that fondly.

Personally, Time didn't care what he was. Turning into a vampire didn't change his core personality. He was still the kind and loyal man who worried about everyone more than himself. He was still very much the man Time looked up to when he was younger and no longer had any role models after the Great Deku Tree died. It wasn't to say he went unchanged though. He pulled away a bit more, not wanting to inconvenience anybody or for anybody to worry about him, but all that did was make Time want to help him more.

“So you know what happened to him?” Wind asked.

“You mean how he turned into a vampire? I'm not completely sure. He called it a curse,” Time said with a frown as he thought back to the more confusing parts of his childhood. “Vampires can turn other people into vampires by drinking enough of their blood, or if people drink their blood, but he was never bitten. As far we know, he never interacted with a vampire before becoming one. It had to have been a some sort of curse but I wasn't there with him the moment he was cursed, just when he lost control for the first time.”

Legend hummed to himself, his eyes glued to the ground as the gears in his mind turned.

“I haven't come across a curse that didn't have some sort of method to break it... but that can come later. For now, we need to calm him down before he makes all of us deaf or destroys his voice. Time, you knew him before and after he became a vampire. How did he react to the Master Sword?”

“He was able to continue to wield it but he was only able to use it for so long before the sword would start to hurt him.”

Sky's face twisted into a confused frown. Time had his own past with the sword that could make the anger ignite all over again at the very thought of it, but even Time found it odd that the sword would reject Warriors... only after using it for a few hours. The sword was usually all or nothing in regards to who was allowed to touch it, but Warriors was strangely somewhere in the middle.

“Sky, give me the sword. I want to test something.”

Sky nodded and did as he was told, gently placing the unsheathed sword in Legend's hand. Legend slowly approached Warriors. His yellow and red eyes narrowed at the sight of the sword and he twisted in his bonds with a particularly threatening snarl. Time hoped it was a sign that Warriors was slowly coming back, that the fact that he knew what a sword was and what it could do to him was a sign of thinking that was beyond the feral vampire instincts.

Legend ignored the snarl and knelt beside him, placing the blade flat on his back. The effect was instantaneous.

Warriors screamed in pain, trying to squirm away from the blade but Legend used his other hand to hold him down. Time winced. He hated knowing that any of the boys was in pain. He wanted to pull Legend and the sword away from him but he stayed still, knowing that Legend had a plan. He wasn't the type to hurt anybody on purpose and he knew it was as stressful, if not more stressful, to Legend as it was for the rest of them.

Then it stopped. The sword was still on Warriors' back though the captain was still, panting heavily, but he was otherwise still. Legend waited for a moment before untying the scarf and pulling it off of him. Time let a breath out as the vampire looked over to them, his eyes now the blue that Time was so familiar with.

The sword brought him back. Perhaps it wasn't that bad after all.

“Warriors?” Wind asked, his voice hopeful.

“Ugh,” Warriors muttered. “Why am I tied up?”

Legend set the sword down on the ground and proceeded to untie all of the knots Wind used. “You drank black blood and it made you lose your mind. Good job killing all the darknuts though.”

“... oh. I thought that would go better.”

Wind ran over to Warriors and hugged him. Legend got to his feet, grabbing the sword as he did so, and wandered back to Sky. “I was so worried! Time said you would come back but it was kind of scary.”

“I'm so sorry. I try to keep the monstrous-”

“Nope, you're not allowed to finish that thought,” Wind said, pulling away from the hug. “I haven't heard of vampires at all until today but I don't care about that! You're still my brother, okay? Just let us help you.”

Warriors blinked in confusion. “But-”

Wind gave him a pointed look. Whatever thought Warriors had died on his lips.

“Now that Warriors is back, how about we get away from the battlefield?” Four mumbled.

“Wait, Legend. How many darknuts did I bite? Did it get decapitated?”

Legend raised an eyebrow. “I know that you bit one and you did take its head off after. What about the rest of you? What did he do?”

“That was the only one,” Time supplied, knowing why Warriors was worried but he would leave that up to the captain to explain. “Let's get moving. You guys can question Warriors later.”

To the group's credit, not one question was asked until Wild passed dinner around. All of them were curious to a fault but they tended to keep their questions to themselves, knowing that there was a right time and place to ask it. Or at least, a better time and place for those questions.

“You still eat regular food, right?” Wild asked as he held out a plate of seasoned, fried vegetables and rice, not sure if Warriors would take it or not. Time wondered if he knew he opened the flood gates.

Warriors flashed him a smile. “Of course! I would have to drink blood much more frequently if I didn't have something to supplement it with. I think that's just something I can do though. The other vampires say they can't stomach people food. Either way, I'm glad that I can enjoy your meals. It's way better than anything I get at home.”

“Time said you're somewhere between a vampire and a Hylian,” Four muttered from behind his plate. “How does that happen?”

“I had my blessing when it happened,” Warriors mumbled, setting down his plate and showing the group the back of his hand where the mark of the Triforce was burned into it, nearly blending in with the rest of the burn scars on his arm. “I think it must have protected me and let me keep some of my humanity. I don't feel the weaknesses as strongly as the other vampires... but I don't feel the full benefits either. I can be in the sunlight without combusting but I can't do everything they can do.”

Hyrule stared into his food for moment before looking up. “But you still need to drink blood, huh?”

“Yeah. I can supplement with regular food but I can't replace blood. The source of the blood doesn't matter, so I drink mostly monster blood even though it doesn't taste as good, but I starve without it. I can go maybe two weeks without it if I don't get injured, use my powers, or push myself too much.”

“And if he goes too long without it, we will see a repeat of today. His instincts will take over and they don't differentiate between friend and foe. His instincts only care about survival,” Time added, levelling a look at Warriors. As much as the captain was pretty good about staying on top of his hunger – drinking black blood was the only time he lost control since they were brought together – the rest had to know what to expect. Time doubted that they would see Warriors lose control again but regardless, they needed to know what his needs were and what happened if they weren't met.

“That's not going to happen again,” Warriors hissed, his eyes shifting briefly as he flashed his fangs. Satisfied, he started digging into his food again. He had no problem hissing at Time, though only because the captain was aware that he wasn't scared. Time wasn't even fazed by anything Warriors pulled on him anymore.

“Yeah, we're going to make sure it doesn't happen again,” Wind said. “You're not allowed to drink black blood ever again and we'll make sure you get enough non-infected blood no matter what it takes!”

“My slate can keep it fresh!”

Time smiled. This is why he loved the boys so much. They didn't know each other for long but they always went above and beyond to help each other. Not one of them shied away from Warriors when they realized he was a vampire, they just wanted to understand him better. At the end of the day, despite everything they went through on their adventures, they were good boys with their hearts in the right place.

“Don't be afraid to tell us what you need Warriors,” Time said with a small smile. “I know you prefer to sleep during the day and you're not holding any of us back if you need a day to rest.”

“I appreciate the offers. Truly.”

And yet, he couldn't look at any of them.

It was going to take time, that he knew. Just because he revealed his secret didn't mean he was ready to let them help him, at least right away. He was used to handling everything on his own and suddenly including eight more people wasn't going to be easy for him.

“I'll do my best to include you guys,” he mumbled.

“Good!” Wind said with a nod. “Now, for a more important question. If you drink the blood of a drunk person, do you also become drunk?”

“I mean, I haven't thought of that to even try it, but that's easy to find out. We just need a volunteer to get absolutely plastered-”

“We are not doing this right now,” Time muttered.

“I never said we needed to find out right now.”

Time rolled his eye. Maybe there was something about Warriors that could come close to surprising him. He momentarily forgot that just because the captain was good with strategies didn't mean he was above acting like a complete idiot sometimes.

Time forgot to cuff Warriors. Nobody reminded him. Apologies for the long wait! I have ideas but they were super difficult to turn into words! I had to switch perspectives a bunch and restart this chapter several times until I finally got something to stick and even then, it might be too… wordy? I dunno how I feel about this one but I wanted to get it up so I could get into the more episodic chapters. Speaking of chapters, I do have more chapters lined up (one is done and the others are going well enough) so the next update shouldn't take almost three months. Hopefully.

[anastasiaskarsgard]

My whore

Warning: cursing, sex, adult content 18+

I should edit this, but I will later maybe. Just busted this out at lunch for no fun

As she pulled her hood up even more, and briskly walked down the familiar street, she could hear her heart pounding in her chest. Her stomach did a somersault as soon as she she spotted the lone figure standing outside the dimly-lit liquor store. She knew better, she really did. You play with fire, you’re bound to get burnt eventually, but try as she might to practice self preservation, she just hadn’t a care when it came to him. It was a well-known fact that he was someone dangerous and she felt the most scandalous rush whenever she was near him.

She gracefully made her way to his side, briefly knitting her brows together in self-loathing for being unable to just walk on by or ignore him.

"What do you want?" The man moved closer watching her with a cold sneer on his handsome face as he studied her changing expressions. He was absolutely fascinated by how expressive her face was. The way she smirked and you could see the hint of a dimple, or how her eyes narrowed into slits when she tried to control herself from telling him off. How her full lips drew together in a bow when she was determined, or if she felt particularly brazen, she’d cock a single eyebrow and grin like a cat.

Being who he was, his facial expressions ranged from various levels of boredom, to every level of rage. Hatred and apathy was all he’d ever really felt, except when he was around this girl. As the corners of his mouth nearly twitched into a smile, he grabbed her hand, forcing her close to his body, chests touching, thrilling at the stunned look on her face.

"You know what I want princess?” His lips found her ear, fangs nipping at the lobe, hyper aware of her dainty hands clutching his shirt, her breathing growing more erratic by the second, and her icy blue eyes scanning his face, searching for his intent.

"Please Roman....." She pleaded.

His hands brushed over an area she never let anyone else touch, moaning in spite of herself. When his fingers took hold of a swollen nipple and tugged at it viciously, she had to bite her lip, to stop herself from screaming aloud. Her knees shook and she tightened her grip on his shirt, scared if she let go she’d fall. She cursed herself for always turning to silly putty in his hands so easily, but she couldn’t help it. He was intoxicating.

Roman scratched his nails down the taut flesh muffling her sweet mouth with his own. Inhumanly sensitive ears, and Jade green eyes became aware of a few of her friends moving their way, and before she noticed them, (or them her) he dragged her down a nearby alley, walking swiftly with purpose in hopes they hadn’t been discovered.

It was no surprise that her friends weren’t fans of his. He’d beaten up the males of the little posse, after they’d tried to confront him for filming himself fucking their girlfriends and posting it a snippet on his Instagram story when he was high. He hadn’t even remembered he’d done it, until they marched up and shoved a phone in his face, and he could understand why laughing and commenting on one of the girls o face, could be seen as a dick move. The rest of the girls in her circle of friends would drop to their knees and service him if he so much as glanced their way, but he had been far too distracted by the girl he was currently dragging behind him to care.

"Where are we - what are we doing?" The breathless girl inquired, as he continued forward like he knew where this lead. Her eyesight needed time to adjust, so she was still practically blind.

"Why do you sound so scared princess? You came and found me." He came to a small alcove and He pushed her firmly against the wall, hands going to her waist, lips finding their way to her neck.

"I had to twist your arm too." She whispered sarcastically, feeling his hands slip under her shirt rubbing, caressing and fondling her breasts. She bit her swollen bottom lip, silencing the moan which threatened to escape. Her own hands seeking out his skin, desperate for the closeness and intimacy found with skin on skin contact. She shuddered with anticipation as she raked her fingernails down his chest, feeling his muscles jerk under her touch. She moaned wantonly as her shirt was pushed up, exposing her to the night air, before her nipple was engulfed by a warm, wet mouth and she gripped his head pressing him closer to her.

Her sudden intake of air, made him look Out of the corner of his eye to be sure the immediate area was free of any sudden movements. Finding none, Roman smirked allowing his eyes to wander back to the half naked beauty before him. Pushing her skirt up, he pulled her panties to the side, sinking two fingers into her aroused body, driving then in a series of quick, hard movements, mouth covering hers when her sounds rose in pitch. Feeling an almost desperate need to be inside her, he Freed himself from his slacks, pressed up against her body, lifting her legs to straddle his waist and pushed his length deep inside of her core. He couldn’t get over how tight her sheath was every time, even though he had worked her over several times with his impressive manhood. Doesn’t mean he ever went easy on her, if anything it made him pound into her that much harder. He wanted to ruin her for any other man. The thought of someone else inside his princess made him see red.

Just the thought of someone else tasting her had His mouth possessively taking hers, in a wild, untamed passion rendering the girl practically breathless. All she could do was hang on, as he fucked her senseless like a man possessed or a demon. She felt fire course through her veins, igniting suppressed emotions, spiralling her to a pleasurable Eutopia of her own creation. Coherent, logical thoughts were lost and she surrendered her mind to the unlikely possibility that this was all there was. Her and him forever.

Just when she thought he couldn’t possibly fuck her any harder, he grabbed her by the shoulders and fucked up into her savagely, almost bruising as he delved deeper. She didn’t know why his rough animalistic behavior aroused her beyond anything so violent ever should, but it quickly brought her to climax, engulfing her in flames, limbs locking around him as she bit into his shoulder, sending a tingle of ecstasy down her spine, as she felt him spill inside of her, stuttering his hips to a stop. He pressed his forehead to hers and opened his eyes to stare into hers, before closing them and kissing her passionately.

"Roman,” She murmured, as they paused for air, dragging them both back into reality. Finally regaining the strength she had lost in their frenzied sexual escapades, attempted to push her partner away. He hesitantly relented, giving her enough space to stand. Legs trembling slightly, she adjusted her clothes, back bracing against the wall and head still dizzy from his presense. Muscular arms wound around her waist and she stood perfectly still as he pulled her close again, and his breath feathered across her cheek.

"Eager to escape me princess?" He purred, mockery making it's way into his voice and she damned him for so damn attractive. Not that he wasn’t gorgeous to look at, but it went beyond his heart throb, movie star looks or tall statuesque form. He had a Raw, primitive sexuality that cant be described in words, but was painfully obvious, that made him beyond desirable.

"I don’t know why I let you do this to me. I’ve got your cum running down my leg and I'm supposed to meet my friends fifteen minutes ago."

"Don't lie to me." He hissed, turning her to face him, thumb and forefinger capturing her defiant chin increasing the pressure when she tried to look away. "Tell me you enjoyed what we just did."

"I didn't." She bit out defiantly, the fire in her eyes growing stronger, fed by his arrogant attitude. "In fact I hated it."

His amused laughter infuriated her even further, and she had to use every ounce of willpower not to scream in frustration.

"That's what I like about you,” His green eyes gleaming darkly. "Always resisting me. It makes complete and total possession of your body that much more sweet."

"A possession? Is that what I am to you?" She shrieked, striking him in the chest, trying to break free of his embrace. This only made him bring her body closer, pressing his renewed arousal against her in an unmistakable way. Lips skimming her cheek, and throat, hands touching her everywhere as she squirmed in his grasp.

"Does this bother you?" He whispered eyes locking with hers, mouths so close they could feel each others breath.

"Yes." She whispered, willing herself the strength to resist him.

"You sure seemed like you liked it when I fucked you, out in the open, in a dirty alleyway like a fucking whore.” His words pierced her heart like a dagger had been laced with them, and in a burst of strength, she threw him off of her, and she stormed down the alleyway. Certain this was how Roman Godfrey, discarded his toys, she let out a yelp when she was grabbed from behind and spun around. Aggressively seizing her in his hold as she thrashed, he bent and whispered in her ear, “I love how you fight me...” before claiming her mouth with his own. The kiss sent a shiver down her spine, causing her traitorous body to move closer to him, practically begging and pleading for more contact. Her long-fingers raked through his chestnut hair gripping the strands firmly, tugging in a confused attempt to hurt and arouse.

A wanton moan was heard and she found herself pinned against the wall again. Their movements desperate and uncharacteristically sloppy. Emotions running wild, not wanting to acknowledge they were already in over their heads. That this was more than just sex, there were true emotions underneath it all, and it was terrifying. No one in their right mind loved a man like him, and no girl could possibly love him ran through their chaotic thoughts as the alarms went off, but neither heeded the call. Pleasure that could be described as unimaginable pain flowed through them, pushing all their insecurities down and finding them lost in each other once again. Their ragged breathing was the only sounds heard and they kissed sweat drenched faces absentmindedly. His low chuckle garnered her attention and she looked at him curiously.

Feeling his member once again free, and pressing deliciously close to her entrance again, she shifted to make access easier.

"Tell me you enjoy this. Tell me you like us." He smirked, eyes betraying a hint of vulnerability that was gone so quick, she wasn’t sure she saw it.

“Or what? You won’t fuck me again?” She asked cocking her eyebrow, and grinning up at him.

“You love it.”

"What if in fact I hated it?"

"You didn't." He proclaimed confidently.

She wished with all her might that he was wrong, but he was right. She loved their fucked up little arrangement. “I don’t love being called a whore.”

“How about just my whore? Only my whore? Hmmm?” He asked, eyes flashing darkly.

“You’re such an asshole.”

“But I’m your asshole.”

“My asshole.” She giggled.

“My whore.” He growled as he thrust up inside of her.

[allherdaydreams]

Valley of Kings — Chapter One

Vali | The Middleman

Universe: Vikings Pairing(s): None yet (there will be several later on, mainly Ivar x fem!OC and much later on, Harald x fem!OC) Word Count: 3,160 Warnings: Bad writing ig? Author’s Note: I don't really love this lol, but I decided I'm just going to publish the chapters on here when I'm done and have slightly edited them and hope for some feedback, etc. Sorry if it's not great! Anyway, lemme know if you wanna be on a taglist and I’ll add you! Constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated ❤️

read the prologue here

I remember the smell of the air — as spring was leaving, with summer slowly taking its place, the wind was gentle and sweet with the scent of wildflowers. The hunting cabin which belonged to the royal family of Kattegat rested in the foothills just east of the town; to the south surrounded by trees, and to the north, mountains. The smell of pine and woodbine lingered in the air, too, though all of the sweet scents of the wilderness were drowned out with that of the meat we roasted over the fire each night we stayed there.

I remember the way the grass tickled the back of my neck as my friends and I watched the clouds. I had never understood why Sigyn insisted on being barefoot every moment that we were out there, but in midday, the dew had only just faded and the greenery was soft underfoot. The clear blue sky gave us a false sense of security.

It was the last truly peaceful day I would have in a long, long time. I must have been fifteen or sixteen, but I had always looked and acted older. My friends were all older, too — I was the same age as the youngest son of Ragnar, Ivar, but I only spent time with him when his brothers were around. I had been inseparable from Ubbe, Hvitserk, and Sigurd since I was small. We all figured we would stay that way forever.

We had been at the cabin for many days, and planned to head back into town at the end of the upcoming week. That day, Hvitserk and I had both killed a deer, Sigurd had caught many rabbits in his traps, and Ubbe had tracked a boar, though he was still waiting for the right time to shoot it without the probability of getting attacked. (He was much wiser than Hvitserk and I; had it been either of ours to kill, we would have gone after it with no hesitation or regard for our safety at all.)

My sister had come with us — Ivar went, too, and wherever Ivar was, Sigyn was never far behind — but had never enjoyed hunting. Instead, she chose to spend the trip in and around the cabin, cooking and cleaning. When the chores were all done, she spent the rest of her time alone out in the yard, lost in her own head. She was, it seemed, daydreaming at nearly every waking moment of her life.

When we reached the cabin that day, we found her in her usual spot on the grass, staring off at the clouds even as we reached her. Ivar crawled toward her, but instead of trying to grab her attention, he only laid down next to her.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked, staring up at the sky. As the other princes and I walked into the cabin, I heard Sigyn begin to tell a most detailed story, as she always did when Ivar asked that question.

"I am dreaming of a far away kingdom on the edge of the world..."

When we had resurfaced from the entrance of the cabin, Ivar and Sigyn were still laying in the same spot. Hvitserk had flashed me a grin as he nudged my arm before strutting over and laying down on the vacant side of Sigyn. Knowing he wished for me to follow, I laid down next to him.

"You know, Sigyn," Hvitserk said. "If you come with us to the Mediterranean, you will get to see a far away kingdom."

"Yes, Hvitserk, I know." She responded simply. "But it would not be as magnificent as the ones I dream about. Besides, I love Kattegat and I have no wish to leave. We have been over this."

Sigyn had always been straightforward. She was very honest about everything, and often didn't understand the difference between our jests or when we meant what we said. I suppose that my sweet sister assumed that everyone would be as charmingly frank about their feelings as her.

Sigyn had the softest, steadiest voice I had ever heard. She often kept a calm tone which made her seem as if she had the most level head in Norway. Only when she was in great distress or feeling something very strong did her tone ever noticeably change. Not to say she was emotionless by any means — she felt a great deal more than I could ever wrap my head around — but she was always calm. At least, she always was when she was around us.

"Are you going to be okay here while Mother and Father and I are gone, Sigyn?" I asked gently, leaning upwards just slightly to look over at her past Hvitserk. Hvitserk's brows furrowed slightly, and he looked over at her too as she gazed thoughtfully at the clouds. She nodded slowly, turning her head to meet our gazes.

"I think so. You will not be gone very long. I will have Ivar and Muninn." I smiled at her sweet tone, but had to keep myself from grimacing.

"We may be gone all summer," I reminded her.

"Or longer," added Hvitserk. She nodded again and looked back at the clouds.

"Perhaps you will. And I will miss you everyday. But you'll come back." Hvitserk and I looked at each other, and I shrugged as I laid back down. I knew she understood — she was always the more intelligent twin — but I just didn't want her to be hit with the emotions all at once when I would not be there to talk over them with her. We may not have spent every waking moment together, but we had never been separated in our lives.

We stayed there for a long time, quietly and sparsely conversing amongst ourselves. When Ubbe and Sigurd had finished skinning the meat for dinner, they called us over. Sigyn and Ubbe were the best cooks among us, so they were the ones to prepare our meal while the rest of us sat around them and talked. It was not long until we heard the sound of hooves coming up the path to the cabin, and Hvitserk and I stood and craned our necks to see who the incoming rider could be.

"It's Bjorn!" I called the others. Sigyn and Ubbe looked up then, put down the food, and quickly joined the rest of us as we all watched the eldest prince of Kattegat approach.

His expression was grim — though he was usually serious, I wasn't used to him looking so discouraged or unhappy. He dismounted his horse once he reached the cabin, tying the reins to a fence post.

"Hello, Bjorn," Sigyn said, walking up to him with a smile. She turned towards the tall horse, stroking his head gently, her attention now completely focused on the stallion. Bjorn smiled faintly as he gave her a nod.

"Hello, Sigyn," As he passed her, he patted her shoulder. Tearing his eyes away from my sister, he looked towards the rest of us, and his expression darkened again. "I come with news. You will all want to sit down."

By the time Bjorn had finished his story, all of our faces looked just as grim as his. Sigyn, who was sat on a bench behind Ivar, was the only one of us who didn't look angry in the slightest — her downcast eyes made it seem as if she was on the verge of tears as she absentmindedly ran her fingers through Ivar's hair. She had always had a habit of soothing herself with soft textures when anxious or upset; usually, one of us lent our hand or hair for her to play with, if there was no small animal close enough for her to pet.

We were all quiet and contemplative for a while, all of us stuck in our own thoughts. I wondered what Hvitserk was thinking.

"You think our father never knew?" Ubbe brought his gaze up from the table to the sky, which had turned to grey. I saw in his eyes a calculating worry. He was trying to find reason in something where there likely wasn't anything that was good enough to justify it.

"It's possible," Bjorn mused, watching the knife in his hands as he turned it over slowly. "In those early days, it wasn't easy to navigate the sea."

"He knew. He had to." Hvitserk spoke from beside me. I glanced at him and nodded in agreement.

"If he did, he should have told the people," Sigurd decided aloud. "Everyone lost relatives; fathers and uncles, sons and daughters. They would have demanded revenge."

"That is why he didn't tell them," Ivar shot back, glaring at Sigurd.

"What do you mean?" Ubbe asked as his brows furrowed. Ivar rolled his eyes.

"It was a waste of time." He said simply.

"Ivar..." Sigyn's voice trailed off. Her face made it clear that she wanted to say something, but didn't know how to approach her volatile best friend.

"They were dead, Sigyn! Ragnar wanted to sail to Paris. He wanted to be famous. Isn't that more important?" He turned to look at her, and she drew her hands back from his hair and into her lap. "Hmm?"

Sigyn looked at the ground.

"I don't think so," She said solemnly.

"You can say that." Bjorn replied, shrugging. Ivar turned again, back to facing his brothers and I.

"I can say that? What does that mean?"

"Here's what it means —" Hvitserk interjected. "— at least to me. Our father abandoned us. We were just kids, and he ran off. Only the Gods know if he's still alive. And now, we hear he kept this big secret from everyone. That he was not truthful or honest."

"This makes me feel sick," Sigurd shook his head again. "How could our father not tell the people what had happened?"

"Maybe if he had told them, they would have killed him." Bjorn replied, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"If it's true..." Ubbe began. "If it's true that our father lied to his people and abandoned them, then I hope he never comes back."

"He betrayed our name. If he ever came back, I would kill him." Hvitserk snarled, ripping Sigyn out of her mind and back into the present. Her head shot up to look at Hvitserk.

"Me too." Sigurd agreed. Sigyn looked back and forth between the two of them, her expression somewhere between alarm and betrayal.

"Screw you!" Ivar exclaimed. Hvitserk scoffed and looked down, shaking his head. "All of you. He never did anything wrong. He is our father. And that is the end of it. You all sound like a bunch of Christians."

"I love our father as much as you do—" Ubbe said, but was interrupted by Ivar.

"Who said I loved him, Ubbe? I said I admired him. He's Viking. And you are soft." Ivar's voice was defensive, challenging, angry; as he usually was.

"I am not soft! None of us—" Ubbe gestured to his other brothers and to me. "— are soft. But we want to understand what our father did, and what he was."

He crouched down in front of Ivar, glancing up at Sigyn before making eye contact with Ivar. "As his son, his fame does not interest me. What he used his power for—" Ubbe pressed a finger to his temple. "— now that would interest me."

"By now, my brothers, there will be a lot of anger in Kattegat. Now they know the truth. Our father betrayed a whole generation of people," Hvitserk said.

"So if he ever came back—" Sigurd started to say, causing Bjorn to sit up straighter and stare at his brother.

"I don't think he is ever going to come back!" Bjorn exclaimed, frustrated. "I think what happened in Paris finally broke him. You all can say whatever you want, but he was a human. People started to talk as if he was a God — he was not a God! He was a man! A man with many dreams and many failings. I've learned that in the years since he went away. If I was him, I wouldn't come back."

I glanced at my sister now, who was watching Bjorn sadly.

"Despite all his failings, he is still the greatest man in the world to me," Bjorn looked down at the ground again as finished his sentence.

"He cared for you — he cared for all of you," Sigyn said, looking to each prince in turn. "He made mistakes, but as Bjorn said, he is only human." Bjorn and Ivar nodded, but Hvitserk and Ubbe shook their heads.

"Sigyn, we were not lucky as you were to have a father that was there for us. If he truly cared enough, he would have stayed." Ubbe told her. His voice was gentle, as it always was when he spoke to her, but I could hear the frustration behind his words. "You should learn that about love now; love means loyalty. Dedication. You don't abandon those you love."

I watched my sister grapple with finding the right thing to say. Ivar reached a hand behind him, blindly reaching for Sigyn's own. Once he had grabbed it, he guided it to his shoulder before letting it go. Her fingers traced shapes onto his shirt.

"I must go to your home now, Vali, Sigyn," Bjorn looked towards each of us in turn. "I have more preparations for the voyage to discuss with you father, and now I should talk to him about this as well." I nodded at him.

"I will go with you," I replied, and looked towards Sigyn, who met my gaze.

"I should stay here, then. There is no need for both of us to go," She decided.

"Perhaps we should head back to Kattegat early," Ubbe suggested, looking to his brothers. "See the reactions of the people."

"We already know how the people will react, Ubbe," Hvitserk said. "But yes, we should go and see what we can do."

The journey to my home was longer than usual; we had gone around Kattegat instead of cutting through it, which was the quickest way there, but didn't seem appropriate. A silence hung between Bjorn and I for most of the journey.

"You did not speak," Bjorn said finally, just before we had reached my home. "You did not speak when we were discussing my father."

I nodded at him. "It was not my turn to speak. Not my conversation to have." Bjorn let out a short hum of amusement.

"I think you discount your wisdom. Or maybe your importance," Bjorn decided. I didn't have an answer to that.

We dismounted our horses as we reached out family's land. Bjorn walked ahead of me, but stopped slowly and leaned against one of my father's many souvenirs from past raids. I stopped beside him, and he glanced at me before nodding his head over to the water. When I followed his gaze, I was met with my parents wading in the shallows with the little model ships I had helped him make.

My father must have noticed our presence somehow, because he turned to look at us before he walked over. Bjorn drew close to him, then spoke in a low voice.

"Did you know Ragnar lied to us all? The settlement in Wessex was destroyed as soon as we left." My father looked from Bjorn to me, then to the ground as he thought for a moment. He nodded, glancing back to me before looking Bjorn in the eyes again.

"I knew," He said. "A farmer who had escaped the slaughter told you father and I what had happened. Then, Ragnar killed him, so no one else would find out."

"You were a good friend to my father," Bjorn replied simply.

"Bjorn? Vali?" My mother's voice reached my ears, and I turned from the men to her, smiling.

"Helga," Bjorn answered, immediately walking towards her.

"Hello, Mamma," I called to her, following Bjorn again.

"What brings you back so soon, Vali? I thought you were going to be gone hunting for another week," My mother questioned as she walked out of the water and met us on the sand, embracing me.

"I decided to come back early. We caught plenty of game," I lied, but she nodded and smiled as she drew away from me. She turned to Bjorn.

"And what brings you here, Bjorn?"

"I was just coming to see how the boats were progressing," Bjorn explained.

"What do you say, Helga? What shall we tell him?" My father asked, walking along the docks.

"We think that it won't be long before you have boats ready and able to take you to the Mediterranean Sea," My mother told Bjorn happily.

"If it exists," My father muttered.

"Of course it exists," Bjorn insisted, looking up from the model boat my mother had placed in his hands.

"It's just a map, Bjorn; marks on a paper. A child could have drawn it! How can we know it's real?" My father asked. Bjorn studied the boat more as he thought over his words carefully.

"I learned from my father. The only way to tell if something is real..." Bjorn knelt down, gently pushing the model back into the sea. "...is to sail there."

I would like to think I can remember everything of that day — of most days spent at the hunting cabin, in Kattegat; with my friends, with my sister; the days that bled into each other and the nights that ended with sunrise instead of slumber; that phase in my life where I was preparing for the rest of it, learning the arts and trades and traditions of my people.

Indeed, I would certainly like to think that nothing of those days has escaped my memory. But as I write this, and as I try to recall every moment of every day & night spent in the sweet comfort of home, of youth, of camaraderie with those whom I still love most in the world, I recognize that the mind is never so sharp as to be able to recall every last detail or feeling from many years prior. My mind is not as sharp as it once was, either — I have accepted that soon, if it hasn't already, it will begin to fail me.

Perhaps not all of this story happened in the way I remember it — who is to say, when so few of us are left and still able to recount our adventures? — but the stories of my people & my past deserve to be told. Otherwise, who will remember the Norsemen? The Vikings are gone. I am one of the last to be able to remember the Golden Age. This story is mine to tell.

tags // @peachyboneless @youbloodymadgenius sorry y’all probably forgot about this fic its been so long lmaoo i’ll unadd you if you want

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS | EPILOGUE

💖 story masterlist 💖

This is it. This is the happy ending they deserve. Fluff. Fem!Loki, because we don't get enough of Loki's female form. Some musings about relationships in general, I think. Guys, I'm crying as I'm posting this.

note: I've got two posts of outtakes coming out sometime this week. Snippets that didn't fit in the story but that have the needed vibe, y kno? As well as a new story is coming out soon... Be sure to check out my main masterlist and taglist if you like my writing <3

I want to thank all my readers for this amazing journey. I love all of you, really, like- I haven't figured out how to produce serotonin on my own ever since I hit puberty, and you guys, you are an amazing source for it. I appreciate the time and the patience that it took to read this 120k word thing and I hope you found a little something for yourself in my writing. A comfort, maybe, because everyone deserves to be happy. I love you all 3000.

"You suck," I grumbled in Peter's direction. Luckily, the little shit was out of my immediate eyesight and I couldn't just pelt him with the assorted items that were scattered around me; luckily for him - after enduring hours of non-stop rambling from the spider boy, I was ready to bargain with Stephen for the sorcerer to put a temporary mute ban on Pete. His nervousness was becoming contagious.

"And you swallow," Pietro replied with a snicker as I heard him wrestle with Peter's tie over the pathetic noises of whining and grumbling coming from the younger man.

"I'm lady, ladies don't spit," I rolled my eyes into the skies, catching Loki's appreciative snicker. She - and yes, Loki was in her female form for this event - carefully combed and did my hair, something completely out of this world, all puns intended. I supposed she was feeling generous, because her female form generally made Loki even more moody and unapproachable. But in a hot way. I hope she didn't notice me ogling her like some kind of gallery painting. "You're a goddess, I can't believe you're friends with me," I addressed Loki, watching the careful movements of her slender hands in the mirror.

A small smirk and a dusting of pink over her pale cheeks was what I got, but the silence was so, so loud.

"Stop flirting," Wanda remarked from her spot by the window where she was doing Natasha's make-up with surgical precision. "You already have three boyfriends, leave some for us, Jesus," Her tone was playful.

"Oh my God, like you didn't brainfreeze and run into the fucking wall, forehead-first, when you saw Loki walk in," I scoffed as Loki's blush deepened.

My witchy friend grumbled something rude in Sokovian under her breath but refrained from any more comments, choosing to simp in defiant silence. Well, good for her, because I was about a hundred and five percent sure that Loki was as equally as smitten with her. It's just that neither of them knew how to approach the other. What can I say, idiots in love...

And yes, yes, I can say that because it takes one to know one. My own idiots were somewhere on the upper floors - getting ready in their own rooms, pulling out their brand new suits and ties for the annual Stark gala. It was supposed to be a charity fundraiser but as all of us were quite disillusioned, we knew it was nothing but a pissing contest between people with small PP syndrome. Even Tony himself said so.

Which is why I had assembled all the girls and theys in my room for a mission debrief. My own personal pride wouldn't let me be anything but a star, and to be completely honest, I just wanted to show off my family to the world - even if the delicate parts of our relationship were hidden from the general public, it filled me with immense amount of joy to be surrounded by my very own at their absolute best.

As for Pietro and Peter, they arrived not too long after me, Wanda, Natasha and Loki made camp in the biggest room with the most amount of natural light, surrounded by make-up and other assorted tools. Both boys were bickering but it was obvious that some of the older men had gotten on their nerves, forcing the youngsters seek solace with their peers.

"You know, Vanity Fair better be talking about us for at least a week," I grouched as Wanda helped me into my dress before I returned the favour. "The amount of people I had to actually, physically talk to, to get us these fucking gowns, is frankly disgusting."

"Agreed," Loki admired herself in the mirror, smoothing out invisible creases in her gown. "Although I must say, the dressmakers on Midgard are far more patient and open-minded than on Asgard." Truly, Loki had nearly driven the poor lady crazy. But on the upside, Loki looked like a living doll. Pristine, perfect.

"Our whims are their wages," Natasha piped up with a chuckle.

We stepped out into the main room, taking note of the men scattered on the couches, all of them wearing an almost identical expression of being already done with the formal event - which, I didn't blame them. Having gotten used to the informal, communal-living atmosphere, I wasn't overly keen on being surrounded by random rich douchebags either; as it was unavoidable, I was going to be miserable - but at least I was going to be miserable in style.

Predictably, the menfolk froze and hurried to pelt us with compliments as they surveyed our ensemble - all of our dresses had a distinct vibe despite carrying a sense of individuality to each gown. That was my idea, actually, to present the team as a family - both to satisfy my own need for one and to present a good public image for the press. Call it getting good cookie from the public - in advance.

"Stunning, absolutely beautiful," Tony chastely kissed my cheek, leading my by the arm towards the limo, Stephen and Bruce a pace behind us. "I'm the luckiest man in the world."

"We are," Bruce corrected him mutely. Stephen's smirk was a mile wide. "It'll be hard to keep my hands to myself for four hours but I'll manage," The scientist added, eyes briefly flashing a fluorescent green.

"There are children here," Peter interjected, nervously waving a hand. I gently elbowed Tony, speaking with my eyes rather than words, that Pete was in dire need of emotional support for his first big public event. With a sigh, the engineer relocated to sit next to the spider boy, both of them talking in hushed tones.

"Now, Bruce," I smiled innocently. "Why would I refuse a dance or five to my favourite lab partner in crime?" I winked at him as giggles erupted all around us. "And I'm sure there's a point somewhere about wizards sweeping princesses off their feet," I kept up the banter in hopes that any remaining tension would evaporate before we arrive to the venue.

I, however, couldn't lose all of it for we were absolutely assaulted by the photographers and press as we arrived to the red carpet; it was only sheer luck that me and Wanda didn't stumble ass over heels out of the limo. That luck's name was Loki: her magic delicately helped us to exit the car with grace despite our large gowns. Mental note to buy Loki all the chocolate: add to priority list.

It went about as good as it could. Peter was introduced as a trainee - and nearly had an aneurysm when Tony none-too-kindly corrected the host, calling Peter his protégée and successor. As for little old me? Rising star of biochemical engineering. No titles, no direct titles, but it was heavily implied we were involved.

I could fell the old, white rich men leering at me despite the layers of silk and tulle. Nobody was commenting on my champagne intake so I downed one after the other until I had a comfortable buzz going on. I could absolutely see why female scientists became either reclusive or brash.

Bruce's eyes followed me wherever I went. I had encountered some people I vaguely knew from all the socialite events I had to attend with my mother, so it wasn't as if I was a fish out of the water; it's just that every time I strayed further than ten feet from out group, I instantly grew a tail in the form of one of the Avengers.

"Sam, quit being creepy," I exited the ladies room, immediately spying the handsome man just 'casually' hanging out by a potted plant, glued to his smartphone and pretending to be very busy.

He looked up guiltily, shutting down Minesweeper and pocketing the phone. "Not taking any risks this time 'round, Princess," He offered me his arm, leading us back to our table. "Tony would have my head."

I rolled my eyes, falling into the chair next to Stephen. "My tracker implant is still in and the bracelets Natasha loaned me are actually tasers. Bird, chill," My hand snuck under the tablecloth, blindly groping for Stephen's hand. It didn't take much time for him to respond, cradling my smaller palm in his larger one, offering the small comfort with a tiny tilt to his lips. Both my large skirt and the fabric covering the table aided the secrecy; I felt like a middle schooler sneaking a kiss from my first crush behind the bleachers.

Coupled with the bubbles in my champagne, it made me giddy.

"Sam is just being careful, Princess," Stephen rumbled patiently. "This ball will be over soon."

I snorted, "But Stephen, I love balls," Causing the whole table erupt in bashful snickers.

"Yeah, think to me about it," Wanda downed the remnants of her wine glass, eyes wide, looking to the side. The giggling became a full belly-laugh as I didn't have the decency to play coy. I just smirked because, yeah, I did love me some...

The final hour dragged on forever. My feet hurt from the dancing. I had my suspicions that time would pass faster if I actually move around so I didn't waste the chance and cajoled Bruce into several slow dances with me. The energy between us was electric; I hoped my wife eyes and the red crawling up his neck would be attributed to alcohol. We spoke in hushed tones, about nothing in particular, the words being like sticks we threw into our fire.

Tony wasn't around much, way too busy to do much more than stop by our table every now and then. I both envied and admired him; he handled everything with grace and serendipity. Tony was right there next to Thor and Loki - literal royalty - and I had to pinch myself to prevent myself from ogling him, sighing in lovesickness every goddamn minute.

"If you ever stop looking at him like that, I don't think he'll survive," Stephen's tone was cheeky; his eyes were intense as he looked down at me as we danced. My sorcerer was rarely sappy, but when he found the words to describe his feelings... It was serious.

I met his eyes slowly, letting him soak in the very same admiration and awe I felt when I was with him. I felt his shudder, I heard the hitch in his breath. He wasn't jealous, no, he simply observed. I wanted him to see what I saw. "The day that I stop looking at you all like that is the day that I need to get my head screwed on straight." I wasn't a poet but neither was this a romance novel. "As far as I'm concerned, I won the lottery, the grand prize and the fucking life."

He chuckled. "You have way too much faith in us, Princess," Twirling me as to avoid the out of habit embrace.

Did I, though? I was inclined to disagree. Sure, we had our spits and arguments and sometimes Stephen would stick his cold ass feet under my blankets, Bruce's love for curry was a crime against anyone who slept in the same room as he and Tony routinely flirted with everyone and everything that had a pulse. I had days where my mother's temper surfaced.

Sometimes, one of us would inadvertently hog the other person and the remaining two would pout, roll their eyes or pitch a fit.

I just didn't see it as a big deal. All of those parts were normal - what couldn't be said about the rest of our situation. Compared to couples I've seen around, I thought we're happy. My boyfriends seemed to be happy, too, and if they weren't, it usually was pretty obvious.

So - okay, perhaps we definitely should be working on verbalizing our feelings. That would definitely solve if not world hunger, then at least the world war three that occasionally erupted in Tony's penthouse. And the ups and downs - not the steep kind, but ones not too different from waves rolling ashore - was what held us together. Because, well, our world was hectic and fast-paced and sometimes we needed that gentle rocking motion to sway us back to peace.

Tony's arm on my waist pulled me back to reality, steering me towards the balcony. Bruce and Stephen followed, all four of us power-walking through the inebriated crowd.

"Just so you know, I'm on board with whatever crazy shit you're planning," Stephen raised a palm towards a smirking Tony.

His mouth immediately dropped into a pout I could barely resist kissing. "But... I had a whole speech prepared," The engineer retorted indignantly, discreetly attempting to swat the sorcerer on the ass.

"And I'm sure it was amazing, honey," Bruce placated the upset Tony with a laugh, causing the latter to intensify his pout, eyeing us with mirth over the rim of his glasses, his stupid, lovely face more kissable than ever.

@another-stark-sub @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit @littlegasps @pilloclock @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads @hermione-grangers-wife @individualistfem @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby @romeo-the-cactus @jelly-fishy-babie @mikariell95 @gladiosamicitias @warrior1-19 @toomanyrobins

[weasley-gal]

My dear friends, followers, and readers: For the better part a week, I’ve been trying to find the words to talk about my Harry Styles show last Thursday, and my experience these last seven months. As yet I'm unsuccessful, but I need to put some thoughts somewhere besides my brain, so here we go. This'll be a ramble, so read on at your own risk.

On March 14, 2021, I was bewitched. Harry Styles opened the 63rd annual Grammy Awards with a performance of his hit Watermelon Sugar, and that was the end of me. (I keep trying to put an adjective in there before "performance," but I can't find one good enough.)

I'm an old person. If I tell you I'm listening to something new, it's probably the latest release from someone I've been listening to for 30 years. I never want to be one of those old people who hates new things just because they're new, though, someone who is bitter about anything that post-dates what could generously be called my "prime." Whenever there's a music awards show on TV, I record it. I don't spend a lot of time on the nonsense in between, but I watch all the performances, in the hope that something *actually* new might catch my fancy.

You could say Grammy 2021 Harry Styles caught my fancy.

I never was a One Direction fan. Not that I have anything against One Direction, but there's room for only one boy band in my heart, and that boy band is Backstreet Boys. (#teamhowie) I was aware enough of 1D that I could have named its members (first names, at least) and maybe a song or two, but that would have been the extent of it.

As a new Harry Styles fan, I was forced to throw myself on the mercy of third-party sellers to score tickets for the Pittsburgh stop of Love on Tour. The show had been sold out for months, and I’m a total a seat snob, so I set a pretty high ceiling on what I was willing to spend on something I'd consider a decent seat. Things like this make people think I "have" money, but I assure you the opposite is true. What I have is boundless enthusiasm for the things I love. Oh, and a pathological lack of impulse control. There’s that, too. For months, I kept one eye on StubHub and the brokers, until about a month ago I found impossibly good seats (center section, aisle seats, first row next to the pit) at a price that was admittedly too high, but less than I'd seen for seats that weren't nearly as good. So…Stub Hub and six months of living on Ramen noodles, then, thank you.

I can tell you it was worth ten times what I paid.

On October 14, 2021, exactly seven months from the day I first noticed Harry Styles, I got to see him live and in person. I expected him to be everything, and he is everything I expected.

Show notes:

Harry Styles can sing. I have his albums and I spend an embarrassing amount of time watching clips online, so of course I know he can sing, but the live performance showcased how powerful and versatile his voice is. He is a very talented boy.

Harry Styles is a seemingly bottomless well of kinetic energy. He never stops moving! Love on Tour is set in the round, giving Harry the opportunity to interact with all corners of the arena, and he wastes not a minute, singing, dancing, joking with fans (he's a genuinely funny guy), and playing off his backing band, who are amazing, by the way. Everyone from the pit to the roof was on their feet for the duration, and there were times the fans had the building literally shaking. And then there’s the din – ye gods – the din! You know, in the third Harry Potter movie, that sound Hermione Granger makes when the Whomping Willow grabs her? Multiply that by 17,000+, then consider this was the reaction to a pre-recorded message from Harry that played before he ever stepped foot onstage. His superpowers are legendary, with or without the MCU.

Harry Styles is in love with performing. He says it's his "favorite thing," and it's obvious how consumed he is by the experience. In turn, he allows his audience to be consumed by it. He encourages everyone to feel free to be who they are, who they want to be, at his concerts. I suspect it's the only place he's allowed to do the same.

Harry Styles is a Rock Star. The person(s) from X-Factor who thought he wasn't good enough to be a solo act must have been bananas. He has an intangible magnetism that is about so much more than talent or songs or looks or any performance art that can be taught. I consume a great deal of entertainment, across time and media and genres. I've seen and met many who are considered all-time greats, and he is like nothing I’ve ever encountered before. I told people I thought I would die from being in the same room with him, and I wasn't kidding. I've always been that fan who jumped and screamed and sang along at concerts, but on Thursday night, I just stood there, fixated. (I did survive, though, obvs, so count me wrong on the whole dying thing.) I bought a shirt at the show and wore it all weekend, before I even washed it. The last time I did that, I was probably about 14.

Pretty sure I'm never taking it off.

On March 14, 2021, I was bewitched by a talented, kind, funny, magical person. On October 14, 2021, exactly seven months later, I was so very lucky to be in the same room with him. If I have seven years or seventy left in this world, I look forward to filling them with the magic that is Harry Styles.🤩💕💚💙

Set List — Pittsburgh, PA, 10.14.2021 (from setlist.fm, because I didn't take a pen with me!):

Golden

Carolina

Adore You

Only Angel

She

Two Ghosts/Falling

Sunflower Vol. 6

Woman

Cherry

Lights Up

Canyon Moon

Treat People with Kindness

What Makes You Beautiful

Fine Line

Sign of the Times

Watermelon Sugar

Kiwi

[imbeccable-writes]

heyy! um i just wanted to say how much i love your separated fic. like i already commented and even drew for it so it's probably obvious but i thought a reminder wouldn't hurt, right? ever since i had read the most recent chapter it has been on my mind, because i'm always like this with this fic. always excited to the next chapter, wondering when it will come and what will happen...-and i don't mean to put pressure on you by saying this! you can take your time writing, i know how hard writing is so i don't want to pressure you for more content. i really admire the work you've done, and i probably already said this in the comments but. thank you for writing and posting it. man i feel spoiled i get to read all of it for free! [holds that fic near my heart]. i hope you have a lovely day :) and thank you for reading

hhhhhh thank you so much!!!! this really made my day, I'm so glad my darling baby has touched your heart so!!! no matter how many times all of you tell me how much you love my story, it always comes a surprise to me akdjakdjaks

as a token of my gratitude for your dedication and admiration, I present to you a snippet of the (somewhat unedited) opening to chapter 9!!

enjoy :)

Nurse walked into Wakko’s room slowly, rapping her knuckles against the door. 

“Wakko? Honey?” she called, allowing some concern to seep into her voice. It was nearly noon and Wakko had shown neither hide nor hair to his caretakers. Nurse knew what day it was, knew it was always difficult for him around this time, but she also knew wallowing all day wouldn’t help at all. 

There was no answer to her call. Nurse waited another beat before walking further in. She approached the bed on the other side of the still-dark room and carefully sat on the edge of it, next to the lump covered in blankets.

“Wakko?” Nurse quietly called and rested a hand on the top of the pile.

The lump shifted, like it was turning away and hiding more.

“It’s morning, honey,” she continued. “You’re missing the day.”

“So?” came the muffled reply.

“You should get up, play around. Weren’t you going to help some of the shopkeepers today?” Nurse said. That didn’t get her another response, so she continued, “You need to eat, too.”

It was quiet, and for a moment Nurse actually thought food wouldn’t be enough to rouse him, but then the lump shifted again and Wakko poked out from under the covers. With the little light seeping in through the open door, Nurse could see the tired, blank look in his eyes, the bags hanging under them. His tongue hung out his mouth, the corners of which were turned down.

Nurse met his eye and he gave her a little nod. She smiled, a little pained and sad, and gently rubbed his back.

She stood up, then, and helped Wakko down. Together, hand in hand, they walked out of his room and down to the kitchen.

Honestly, calling it a kitchen was being very generous. It was just the breakroom of the clinic that Scratchansniff used to run, before therapy and the like became a luxury literally nobody could afford. It was tiny and the fridge didn’t work half the time and the stove only had one working burner, but it was all they had.

Wakko pulled himself into one of the worn chairs and stared down at the floor as Nurse tried to scrounge up something for Wakko to eat. Outside the window, he could hear people going about their day, trying to survive the cold January climate.

At least he couldn’t hear the guards’ gloating, though. Maybe they were all still recovering from their night of celebration.

A few minutes passed, and Nurse was able to set a plate of food in front of Wakko; a single, unseasoned egg and dry toast.

“Thank you,” Wakko mumbled, trying to push away the memories of full plates and flavorful food from his mind. It didn’t work. He missed the orphanage.

Even when they’d gotten poor and the food quality and quantity dwindled, Wakko and the other kids had always been full. At the time, he’d thought it was because the matrons were magic. Now, the memories of tight smiles and thinning bodies and growling stomachs made Wakko’s eyes burn.

Nurse gave him a smile and another pat on the head, before waiting for him to finish.

It didn’t take long, and soon, the two of them were leaving the broken-down building, heading for the square.

This winter had been particularly hard. With little to no money, most of the townsfolk hadn’t been able to properly prepare for the cold months, leaving everyone freezing, hungry, and ill. The stress was starting to get to everyone, and not even Wakko, with his infinite hopefulness and catchy tunes, had been enough to keep their spirits up.

It wasn’t all bad though. Last winter, a few of the kids, like Katie and Skippy, had been inspired by Wakko’s beacon of hope and had declared they’d go to the slightly-better-off towns to try and get some money to upstart their town’s economy again. They left at around this time and said they’d be back in a year with their fortune.

(Wakko had wanted to go too, but when he’d told Scratchy and Nurse, they’d gotten that guilty, worried, for-adult-reasons-I-can’t-tell-you-why-but-no look on their faces, and he’d been left waving goodbye on the train platform as the kids left to do something substantial for the community.

He just wanted to help too.)

Those kids should be returning soon. Any day now. And if they were successful, then their little town might finally get some color back in it. Maybe they’d survive another year. Maybe they’d survive in general.

[shewhowillnotbenamed1]

There were too many places this could have gone, but I wanted Raven and Damian and a broken bed, and this how it turned out. I hope it’s alright!

Prompt List

----------

"So... can you fix it or not?"

He shuffled his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose and stared down at the broken bed frame. But even through the lenses, it wasn't quite clear. Again, there were questions, too many questions - and not one of them good. "So, can you?" Raven asked, re-centering his focus upon the task at hand. Damian knelt low, assessing the extent of the damage. It wasn't just a loose screw or two, the whole frame, it had collapsed in on itself.

The way it looked. If the bed alone looked this way, he could only imagine.

No.

There had to be a reason, some sort of explanation.

Damian stroked the broken bit of bed post and gripped, springing up what little life it was clinging to. The wood let out an awful squeak and a groan, before surrendering in anguish, falling to the floor. His electric-emerald eyes flickered over to the sorceress whose expressionless stare gave nothing away. Though, her tone hadn't exactly been forthcoming. And so the questions hadn't ceased, they had become sentient and started to multiply. Taking up roots, they grew until even his questions had questions.

One edged itself to the forefront of his mind and Damian wondered if he could even pose it to Raven: was this real - was she for real? To come to him like this in the middle of the night, in need of his help with her bed - her broken bed. He rose slowly, and approached her with his jaw tight and steps measured.

What had she been doing in this bed to cause it to break?

Whatever...

Or

Whomever...

Damian pulled off the black framed glasses, and hastily folded them over his waistband, shoving them away along with his darker thoughts. How was he expected to proceed in such a case? What exactly was the due process here? Did the Titans handbook have a chapter about this, or even so much as a footnote? Damian began to formulate what he believed was a rudimentary follow-up. "How did this...even happen?"

It sounded safe, rational.

Surely, it was a reasonable thing to consider given the current situation.

Violet eyes glanced over the wreckage. There was a sprinkling of sawdust on the mattress laying jilted off to the side, the box spring was reduced to a heap of wooden boards, and the thick carved posts were snapped, propped uselessly against the corner of the room. Her cavernous eyes bored into the center of his bare chest, before at last, settling on his face. "Damian, I don't want to talk about it. I just... I need your help, okay?" Her voice wavered for a note. "So, if you can't give me that -"

"No - no. Of course, I want to help," Damian said immediately, standing taller. "I just...want to know what I'm dealing with here, so I can help you best." He motioned with his hand, hoping she would elaborate, or give any clue as to what had happened. And when she didn't speak, he spun up plausible theories.

But, nothing.

Raven didn't bite.

"Was it...your powers? Was it a lack of structural support? Maybe it was foul play - some prank of Garfield's gone wrong? Maybe the wood is old?"

Damian threw out suggestion after suggestion - and nothing. Any indication, even a simple nod, would have sufficed, anything would have been better than him filling in the blanks on his own.

"Or was it...?"

Anything to stop him from wondering about was just below the surface, the subtext: could it have been sexual?

Was it sexual?

He wanted to know. He needed to know. He had to know. She was his best friend. For all that was good in the world - he deserved an answer.

"Was it what?"

"Overuse?" Damian tried. "Or I don't know...misuse?"

"What exactly are you asking?" The mage returned a little less flatly, a little more angrily. "I'm the one with the broken bed and nowhere to sleep tonight. I knew you would be up... and so I came to you. I just needed some help - your help." Raven was resolute as she had been earlier, when she was standing at his door. But now, she seemed determined to answer as little as possible, to even redirect his inquiries back towards him.

What was she hiding from him?

Why was she hiding from him?

Damian glowered down at her. "I am trying to help -"

"So, help." Raven stood on her toes to glare back at him unblinkingly for what felt like hours. And anyone other than Damian would have backed down by now. "But, if you're going to make assumptions or continue to interrogate me, I'll just sleep on the couch."

This was going nowhere.

He sighed, a long drawn out exhale, he needed to breathe, to stay calm. But he could feel himself getting more and frustrated for each second this tennis match persisted. "Why don't you tell me what happened - from your perspective," Damian added quickly.

Raven was right to refer to it as an interrogation, a part of Damian had to give that to her.

This did feel rather like a deposition.

"It was late, I finished meditating, I thought I would try to get some sleep. I was laying in bed, and it broke." She rubbed her arm, trying to look impassive or unaffected and Damian didn't know what, only he couldn't believe this. It was the exact same story - if anything this was less than she had told him before.

His heartbeat pounded deafeningly in his eardrums, and his blood started to sear dangerously under his skin and Damian wanted to demand a sufficient answer from her.

But that wasn't the solution.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, breathing in more slowly. What bothered him the most wasn't the denial, it was Raven acting as though she couldn't trust him.

And if she couldn't trust him, he had far bigger problems.

"Just so I can understand you - so I'm not confused, tell me, how did it break?"

"You saw for yourself - it collapsed."

He shook his head, he just needed her to give him something. Maybe he was just desperate for an opening for the questions he was barely biting back on his tongue.

How was she laying? Was she on her back? Was she alone?

Was she clothed?

"Why?" He burst out. "Why did it break? There's always an explanation. Things don't just collapse."

"Well, my bed did."

Damian had crossed over the bridge of irritation into incredulousness. He was dumbfounded. "I didn't think you even needed one - a bed." He scoffed. "I was under the impression that you...floated above it."

"Where on Earth did you hear that?" Raven's purple eyes narrowed. "I don't float - I'm not a pixie." Damian's lips twitched. So said the petite girl from another land, named after a bird, who spent her days flying around in a leotard.

"Fine, you hover." Damian eyed her, practically insisting. "You definitely hover."

She could project manifestations of wings whenever she appeared. That and the obvious, she glowed.

So if it looked like a duck...

"Yes. I've been known to hover - on occasion - it's not a regular thing." A faint flush began to color her face cerise, much to Damian's satisfaction. "Is my interrogation over, then?" He noticed her expression was slightly less annoyed than before, but more anxious.

Maybe he had been going about this all wrong. What if it was about something else entirely?

He glanced at the little worry crease that indented itself above her left eyebrow. In the idle daydream, he fantasized about touching it, even kissing the muscle until it relaxed. Of course he cared, she didn't even know how much. Damian’s features softened slightly. "Raven, I'm...concerned about you. It's not everyday your best friend shows you her mysteriously broken bed. So, is everything okay? Are you stressed?"

"No, Damian." But Raven had deflated, looking somewhat defeated. "This, it's not at all what you think..."

"Alright, I won't press this anymore." He reached down and touched her shoulder. "Get your pillow and some blankets," Damian ordered. "You're not staying on the couch." The hero stood by Raven's door while she dissected the contents of the rubble. They waited wordlessly for the tell-tale mechanical whirl of the door sealing itself. He shuffled ahead of her to his room, expecting her to follow. "You'll take my bed."

"Oh..." Raven stopped short, staring oddly at the floor. "I didn't ask you for help to put you out."

"You're not putting me out. You couldn't possibly put me out." The corner of his mouth tugged upward for a second as he searched her pale face. "We're best friends, aren't we?" She nearly flinched. "Did I say something wrong?" Damian frowned, trying to level with her.

"Damian, it was my powers, though I'm sure you already knew." Raven bent her head, holding it against the pillow. Slowly, she dragged it down her face. "Do you really want to know what I was doing?" She sounded muffled, but her words were clearer than they had been all night.

"What?" Damian's heart lurched in his chest. Even though he still wasn't sure what to think. But if Raven wanted to tell him -

"Yes."

"In my bed - tonight, I was..." Her voice sounded frailer, even a little afraid. "My bed is broken because... I was alone and thinking of you..."

What?

"You were alone," Damian paused, rather nonplussed. "And thinking of me?"

That was it?

"It was late." Raven spoke slower, this time.

"Yes."

"I was up..."

"Naturally."

"Reading - one of my novels..." Her purple eyebrows arched. "Alone."

"So, you've said."

"...and thinking of you."

"Right..."

"I was thinking of you," Raven repeated. "Alone."

"Oh..." Damian started. He licked his lips thoughtfully. "Oh."

"Oh? That's it, that's all you have to say?" When Raven marched down the hall, her short legs were faster than usual. The other Titan couldn't catch up to her, despite his longer legs, she seemed determined enough to have lapped him.

Or slapped him by the murderous look in her eye.

"Raven, slow down..." Damian stretched out a hand, trying to keep up with her. Every time he thought he was getting closer, she slid further out of reach. He was still processing, he hadn't expected this, if she could give him just one minute -

"You didn't consider for one minute that maybe..." She stopped, strands of plum whipping her cheek, when she turned to him. "No, of course not. How could you? You don't see me that way," Raven swallowed hard. "Or anything."

"Raven. Don't, I -"

"I shouldn't have bothered you with this, you were busy then and clearly you're still elsewhere." Raven didn't meet his eye. "Please, forget I mentioned this - any of this. I'll wake Starfire and you can get back to deliberating, planning or coordinating... You can chalk this up to some insufferable late night psycho babble from a half-demon whose powers must have gone haywire for the second time tonight." She turned away. "Good night."

"But." His fingers brushed her shoulder. "You broke your bed because of me."

"Yes, we've established that. It doesn't mean anything." Raven shrugged him away. "My powers are out of control right now - that's all it really means."

"No." He caught her fingertips and clasped her hand, spinning her to face him. "I'm not going to - I can't let this go." He pulled her in his arms, her stiff, small form. "I can't let you go." Because even still, she was warm and soft and she was Raven. She smelled of honey and sage and soy candles left burning overnight - home. 

This was scent he inhaled whenever his mind registered that he was home. It was like he was home at last, and he wanted to hold her close to him for hours. He stared down at her, marveling at the words as they revealed themselves in a new light that was vibrant, bright and multi-hued. "You broke your bed because of me."

"Let go of me." Raven's cheeks were aflame. Her eyes were wide, her lips were wavering.

"No."

No more rash assumptions tonight, or not acting rashly enough.

All he needed to be certain of was this. And he was not going to let Raven go again.

"I...need to masturbate - meditate." Raven let out a frustrated sob, struggling in his arms. "I need to meditate and -" Damian's fingers swept up the nape of her neck and he pressed the seam of his lips onto her own. The pillows and blankets slid out of her hand, her body had gone pliant. A sweet mewl rose up from her throat and neither of them gave any more thought to the finicky state of her powers, this was more important.

This needed to be communicated, he needed her to understand that he did understand.

"You broke your bed because of me..." He mumbled against her lips, tasting hints of jasmine tea. "You were thinking of me when your bed broke." Damian repeated her words back to her with an understanding that was always there. Just below the surface, it was waiting for him, calling out for Raven. He brushed her hair back from her cheeks. Tucking it behind her ears. "This beautiful mind - here." His thumbs rising to massage that worry muscle above her eyebrow. "I want it on me." And he smoothed his lips over it, kissing it repeatedly. "I want to fill it with thoughts of me. Only me."

"Wait - wait." Raven trembled, her eyes were wild. "What does this mean?"

"What do you think it means?"

He could feel her forehead moving, veins ticking, the brain below it working itself up into a frenzy. She couldn't quite process what was happening. The possibility that he might feel just as strongly, just as intensely. Perhaps even to a greater degree than she.

"Damian... Aren't we - friends?"

"Aren't we past that?" Damian cupped her chin and captured her mouth again. Pressing back against her lips tighter and harder, clutching her - tighter, harder. Running his hands up and down her back, feeling barely any layers to separate what was happening between them. But really, how could something as insignificant as layers keep them apart? Even without his chest bare and Raven's strappy pajama top so tiny there was no way she was wearing a bra.

How could anything now?

Damian growled low in his throat. "Would you come to someone in the middle of the night about your broken bed if they were merely a confidant?" Raven whimpered, as he too had pitched her own words and actions against her, all the while rounding her ear with his tongue.

"But, I thought -" She murmured incoherently into his neck "- and my powers."

"Yes, what about them? How could they resist reaching out, if you hadn't considered more? If you thought of me as only a friend?" Raven gasped, and he stole it straight from her - along with every breath from all the gasps from her lungs. "It's just us, we can both admit the truth."

"And what is the truth?" Raven leaned into him, turning doe-eyed blue-violet upon him. He feathered his thumb over those impossibly soft lips, like he couldn't help himself, because if talking to her meant he couldn't kiss that mouth, he had to touch it in some form or fashion.

"You were reading that romance novel you dogeared to death, I saw it there, covered in wood chips and sawdust." The man, half-naked, broad shouldered, and dark-skinned was unlacing the red corset of a willowy brunette with an arched back. The image was right there on the cover, it was unmistakable. And everything clicked right into place, as if he'd always known. Raven had pictured them in their place and used those thoughts as fodder or fuel. "You were imagining us."

"So tell me." He felt shivers race up his spine and it wasn't from those machinations alone, it was Raven's lips, stroking along his neck. When she spoke her voice was barely a whisper and raspier than he had ever heard it. "What did I imagine?"

"We were in your room, caught up in our connection -" The pale fingers threaded through his hair, in time with his musings. "Caught up in each other in ways that would make the Goddesses blush, if not undoubtedly cause a box-spring shatter beneath us, and then..."

Her hands stilled and tugged the dark strands. "Then?"

"Then it did, your bed broke."

A small smile curved onto her face, but it didn't match the mischievous stare contained in her eyes. Not exactly. "And now we're here?"

Damian glanced at the door plate marking the entrance to his room. "And now...we're here."

[scentedcandlecryptid]

Hello! Here to bombard you with questions.

Do you have the whole story for your ocs planned out? Or is just a general idea right now? Any fun cultural or physical differences between types of elves? (other than the ears being tilted up or down which is super cute btw) At the start of the story do they all know each other already? Is there one main character or is the focus on the four of them? Any interesting things you wanted to include but decided not to? Anything about the story or characters you want to share?

You don't have to answer anything you don't want to! I'm just curious lol

I wanted to start this by saying, thank you so much for this ask. I was so excited to read it, and I am always more than happy to gush about my story since I have so many ideas.

Also, this ended up getting long, so answers under the cut:

Right now, it’s more of a general idea than a full-fledged story. More accurately, I have a bunch of scenes of character moments, arcs and mini-stories, that I’m currently trying to connect in a cohesive manner that makes sense and is still interesting.

Yes actually!! Each type of elf has its own culture (all in various stages of development) and there are a few fun differences physically, but I think that will need a post of its own, because I have tried to write this four times and I can’t figure out how to say it simply, for now, here’s a chart of all the different kinds of ears, as that is the main (and most obvious) thing I’m using to differentiate them physically.

They don’t know each other at the start of the story. Well- probably. For the main main story, they don’t know each other (with one exception I’ll talk about later in this reply) but I might write/draw mini-stories where they do know each other before I get to writing that because introductions are hard and I want to share the interactions they have in my head with all of you.

Who the main character is, again depends on what story I end up telling. If it’s a thrilling adventure about saving the kingdom, Luka’s the main character. If it’s about overcoming adversity, Oak would be the main character. If it’s a story about finding your place in the world and found family, Auster would be the main character. If I wanted insanity with an emotional undertone, Octavious would be the main character. I’m really attracted to the idea of them all being the main character, because I love that so much,, but I don’t know how I could make it work narratively. I guess in their own rights, they’re all the main characters in some way. And no matter what, I will at some point put individual focus on each of them.

I have SO MANY things that I originally wanted to do, but ended up not doing. I have gone through so many different ideas that I’ve ended up ditching for one reason or another. Some highlights:

They were all originally pirates, I have designs of pirate Oak, Auster, and Octavious that were all scrapped.

Oak was going to be the villain of the story. They would originally have opposed our main characters, then have gotten a redemption arc. I have a very sketchy and poorly drawn comic where Oak nearly died.

There was a character who was sun themed, I miss her, but she was bland and thus cut

There was a time when Oak and Octavious looked similar enough that I thought it’d be funny if Octavious thought they were long-lost lost, twins.

There was a very brief period following that idea where Oak and Octavious were long-lost twins. (this is where the idea of Oaks actual twin came from)

There was a time very recently where they all had glowing marks on their skin, it looked awesome, but I decided it was too complicated.

Any other things I want to share? Let me see… Firstly, this world is sort of modern? Depending on where you are in the world the level of technology changes, but you will see skyscrapers, especially in more busy areas. Secondly, there is actually a fifth main character named Clover who is Luka’s childhood friend and a human, but as I’m writing this, I might end up scrapping her,, I never had a strong vision for her character like the others, and while I’m in love with the general idea of her… idk she’s kind of boring. I think she’ll still be included as Luka’s childhood friend.. But I might remove her from main character status. I don’t know. Thirdly, Luka actually can’t use magic, all of his friends can,, but he remains incapable. Fourthly, Octavious is a massive flirt, and also strangely the most academic out of all of them. Fifthly, Avian Elves, of which Auster is, are extremely reclusive. With the exception of a delegate every once in and a while, no one has seen one in forever. Finally, Oak’s main storyline that I have planned, will happen entirely in the background. If you pay attention you might be able to figure it out as I continue to post about this story, but I’ll be playing it as close to the chest as I can.

If you would like to know more/ I didn't explain something well enough, please send me asks! they make my day and I love them so much <3333

I truly hope you enjoy hearing me gush about these guys, I had so much fun writing this.

[snarkwrites]

12 | gangsta; sweetpea

NOTES:

It's been a while. I've had these two chapters written for a while now but I haven't had time to sit down, edit them a little better and post them. Since I have time now, I thought I'd go ahead and do that, whether you guys asked for these next two chapters or not.

Sorry this took forever! Sorry I'm so slow, I've been settling into a new house and taking care of some IRL stuff / taking a little break. I swear, I'm going to update everything sooner or later. >.>

I love you guys.

WARNINGS:

NON/ LOOSE CANON COMPLIANCE - this is the biggest warning, so if you’re into things that follow exact canon plot you are… definitely not going to like this. ANGST & SLOW BURN, HEAVY SEXUAL TENSIONSTARTING NOW, ACTUALLY - this is just so everyone who started reading this thinking the smut would transpire in a hurry knows that apparently, it is not. VIOLENCE / SWEARING & FIGHTING, POSSIBLE UNDERAGE DRINKING AND OTHER SHENANIGANS- look.. it’s high school. shit happens. also apparently, my ofc Alyssa uses the word fuck like all the time?…EVENTUAL SEXUAL CONTENT / A VIRGIN ORIGINAL CHARACTER- this one is self explanatory. yes, i plan to write a smutty chapter in this at some point. when? i don’t rightly know. it’s got a while before we get there. STALKER TW - this chapter marks the true appearance of Alyssa's ex, Dave Novak. It's hinted heavily that he's a gross asshole who likes to play mind games.

If you're under 18+, probably not a good or wise idea to continue reading this series. Because there are going to be a few dark and adult themes within. I'll warn here, of course, but you need to understand that I don't control you. If you continue to read after having read the warnings and you're upset or don't like something... Totally on you, friend.

PAIRING:

Andrews!Sibling OFC x Sweet Pea.

TAGGING:

@brithedemonspawn is the only person on my Riverdale tag list. If you want to be added, the link to do so is below.

OTHER PARTS:

ONE - TWO - THREE - FOUR - FIVE - SIX - SEVEN - EIGHT - NINE - TEN- ELEVEN - soundtrack

OTHER STUFF:

[ about my writing - tag list doc ]

T W E L V E.

[773 - 589 - 7956] attachment

[773 - 589 - 7956] I think I decided how you can repay me, scarlet…

[773 - 589 - 7956] Better enjoy your quiet and happy little life while you still have it, scarlet. Because soon it’s all going to be ripped right out of your pretty little hands.

[773 - 589 - 7956] That boyfriend of yours isn’t even gonna be able to save you this time, scarlet. You’re mine.

[773 - 589 - 7956] See you soon, scarlet.

Each new text that came in had me tensing up. Careful to keep my phone out of sight of anyone who was nearby. My heart was about to beat right out of my chest and my stomach felt like it sank to the floor. I was barely listening to anything being said around me and I guess it was more obvious than I thought because Toni cleared her throat, nodding to the phone in my hand.

Gazing at me in concern.

“Everything okay? You look like you’re going to be sick.”

“Yeah,yeah. Everything is fine.” I lied. I think at that particular point in time, I was just trying to convince myself that this was all some kind of bad dream. Or worst case scenario, Dave was making empty threats.

Toni eyed me suspiciously. I tried to give her a convincing smile, but I’d have had to be an idiot to even think for a second that she believed me. She eyed my phone and reached for it. I managed to shove it in my pocket.

“Trust me.” I pleaded. She gave me a wary look and sighed, grumbling “Fine, okay. Alright.” under her breath.

And I did my best to push the texts out of my head. Jumping in the conversation she had going on with Cheryl and Veronica. Laughing and talking as if nothing were wrong.

Lying through the skin of my teeth.

XXX

“What’s got you so jumpy?”

The question caught me off guard. I wanted to tell someone what was going on, I really did, but… I didn’t want to worry anyone, either. I was at least 99.9 percent sure that there was absolutely no way that Dave would show up in Riverdale, at least that’s what I was hoping.

I did my best to play it off. Shoveling french fries into my mouth just so I didn’t have to answer right away. My cell phone lit up and I flinched before I could stop myself.

Toni reached for it and I quickly grabbed it and shoved it in my pocket. She gave me a concerned look and I muttered quietly, “Probably just Reggie...again.”

“Reggie’s with that new girl though?” Cheryl spoke up. Gazing at me thoughtfully. My breath caught in my throat because if anyone would catch on to there being something truly wrong with me or something off in the way I was acting, it’d be her or Polly.

So far, I’d managed to fool everyone else into thinking I was alright, even my dad and my brother.

,, Dave won’t come here, it’s not worth the hassle. He’s just playing mind games. That’s all this is. Pull yourself together.” the thought came and I managed a smile, shrugging.

“You’ve been acting weird all week, now that I’m thinking about it.” Cheryl was the one who said it and she gave me an expectant look. Waiting.

“I have not.”

,, I do have one secret I can spill. Maybe if I tell them about my crush on Sweetpea…” and so that’s what I did. Sighing as I reached for the shared plate of fries between the three of us. Raking my fries through my vanilla milkshake and taking a few deep breaths to kind of collect myself, both from Dave’s harassing texts and what I was finally about to get off my chest about having feelings for Sweetpea.

“You have. Start talking.” Toni spoke up, watching me. Sizing me up. If I had to guess, I’d pin money on her sitting across the booth, trying to figure out what was up with my jumpy attitude all week.

“Okay, alright. Fine. But what I’m about to tell you two does not leave this table, okay? It.. It can’t. If Sweetpea ever found out, pretty sure he’d start avoiding me and things would get weird.”

Toni and Cheryl exchanged a look and then Toni nodded. Chewing a mouthful of fries as she muttered calmly, “Go on.”

“ I may or may not have a crush on Sweetpea.”

“Oh, you definitely have a crush on him. It’s kind of obvious.” Cheryl gave a soft teasing grin and I sighed. Dragging my hand through my hair and taking a few seconds to let her words sink in. I almost dreaded asking, but I felt like I had to given that she said it was obvious. “Oh god.. He doesn’t suspect anything.. Right?”

“Oh, he’s the only one whose oblivious. But the rest of us, we’ve known a while.” Toni teased me. Then asked calmly, “Is that all? Why’s that have you so jumpy?”

“Because I know how bad I am at hiding things, okay? I was kind of… I dunno, freaking out I guess.” I eyed her, waiting. Searching her face in the hopes that she accepted what I said and didn’t keep pushing. A few seconds passed and she laughed softly. Took a sip of her strawberry milkshake and asked with a smirk, “Are you gonna do anything about it?”

“Probably not. Every time I even think about it, I manage to talk myself right out of it. He’d laugh his ass off, okay? Besides, remember all the flirting he was doing with Josie when they had to work together during the play?” I pouted as I pointed it out.

Cheryl and Toni exchanged looks and Toni laughed. “He was doing that to make you jealous. Or that’s what I think he was doing. Either way… I think you should do something. He’s not going to and trust me… I’ve known the guy my whole life. I know him well enough to say that I know he has a thing for you. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have been so cranky when you two first met?”

“I thought he was just naturally grumpy?”

“Oh, he is, but the way he was towards you was totally different. He’s only that grumpy when he’s trying to keep his defenses up.” Toni informed me before finishing off her shake.

The door to the diner opened and Sweetpea walked in, Fangs in tow. The two of them were laughing about something. I gave both Cheryl and Toni a pleading look and Cheryl seemed to pick up on my unspoken plea to change the subject thankfully, because she asked, “Are you going to F.P’s retirement party at the Wyrm?”

“Yeah.” I answered, finishing off my milkshake. Sweetpea flopped into the booth beside me, carelessly slinging an arm over the back of the seat. His hand brushed against my shoulder and I swear just the small brush against me felt like someone had taken a livewire and dragged it over my body real slow.

Toni smirked at me, nodding at Sweetpea while he was too busy wolfing down french fries to notice and I shook my head.

“I dare you. No… I triple dare you.. Flirt with him.” Toni gave a teasing grin as she mouthed the words to me and I swallowed hard.

She’s not playing fair. She knows I can’t turn down a dare.

I happened to glance out the window of the diner and when I thought I saw Dave standing there, leaning against a streetlamp, one hand in his pocket and a cigarette dangling between his lips, I nearly choked. This prompted Sweetpea to start hitting me on the back lightly as he laughed and looked at me in concern. “Damn cherry, are you trying to kill yourself?”

Toni’s brow raised and Sweetpea explained what happened earlier in the day, how I’d nicked myself with the scalpel in our first period class while doing a dissection. What Sweetpea didn’t know was that when it happened, it was because I thought I’d seen Dave standing outside in the parking lot, only to blink and the parking lot be empty.

I have got to stop letting his stupid mind games get to me. It’s just because he’s texting me again. It’s just because he knows how to work me up and get me all scared, he used to be good at it when we dated.

He’d never come to Riverdale. He’s just doing this to me for his own sick amusement and every single time I let him get to me, especially when I’m to a point where I’m so paranoid I’m imagining that I see him everywhere lately, it’s letting him win and that pisses me off more than anything.

I’m supposed to be stronger than that, damn it.

Toni eyed me suspiciously and I braced myself. When she didn’t bring up my skittish behavior, I relaxed a little.

I wanted to tell someone what was going on, but at the same time, why? I’m pretty sure this is just Dave, being an absolute bag of dicks.

It has to be that. It has to be.

XXX

He stood outside some podunk little diner right in the heart of town. The hazy red neon gave off a comforting and inviting warmth and he lit his cigarette, fuming in anger as he watched her sitting inside.

“I know you’re not ignoring me, scarlet. I know you’re not.” he muttered, mostly to himself as he turned the collar of his leather jacket up against the wind and started to walk towards the South Side.

Maybe it was time he paid his old buddy Eric a visit. Eric was out of prison. Eric was the one who’d told him where Alyssa was to begin with, though he didn’t realize it.

Dave chuckled and shook his head as he walked towards the shitty apartments on the opposite end of town where Eric lived. Eric owed him a few favors. He was coming to collect.

“Did you really think I was jokin when I told ya I have friends all over? That you weren’t ever gonna get away from me?” he mused to himself as he knocked on the door of a first floor slum apartment.

Eric opened the door, leaning in it lazily. Blinking at him in a daze and smirking. High fiving him as he asked him why he was in town.

Dave whipped out his phone, showing Eric a picture of Alyssa. At first he gave him some story about her running off while he was in the pen. Eric wasn’t buying it, he could see it written in the expression on his face. And that only made him angry. Eric owed him. He was here to collect the favor owed. All he wanted was for Eric to help him out on this one little thing.

Eric shook his head, chuckling in disgust. Gazing at him with a brow raised. “I think you need to leave, man. Now. You don’t want the heat this is gonna bring down on you. And I’m not about to get on a Serpent’s bad side, even if the Serpent in question is just a damn kid.”

“See, I’d like to just put this all behind me, man... but she’s the whole reason I even went to prison to begin with. Then I get out and find out not only is my girl not loyal, she’s also the one who snitched on me?” Dave eyed Eric. Getting irritated because this was not how he saw the conversation going.

“I’m telling you, you need to leave. Forget about Alyssa. I see her around all the time with some kid… Sweet Pea or Green Bean, some shit. The Serpents are not people you fuck with, man. Not around these parts.”

“You know the Serpents aren’t shit to me… Right?” Dave quipped, smirking. “I’ve got this under control. I just need you to help me out a little… C’mon, man. You owe me.”

“I don’t fucking care. I’m not helping you do whatever it is you’re here to do. What I oughta do is put a bullet in your fucking head for even thinking I’d be down for this shit. She’s a kid, man. A fucking kid... Favor or not, man… I’m on the Serpents side with this. Not yours. You need to leave.” Eric warned, giving Dave a firm glare as he folded heavily tattooed arms over his chest.

“Oh, so that’s how you’re playin, huh? Okay. Alright. All I wanna do is see her again. I’m not going to do anything. I just want to straighten things out. Get a little closure on the situation...”

Eric scoffed. “This coming from the king of overreaction. I don’t trust you.I’m breakin code of my gang by even talking to your ass. Nope. The answer is no. I’m not helping. Do whatever you have to do to me, but I’m not about to help you scare some kid. I’ve got better things to do with my time, buddy...”

Dave’s arm shot out and he pinned Eric against the door of his apartment. Smirking at him calmly. “I know you haven’t forgotten just how much your sorry ass owes me. Because that’s what this sounds like.”

“I guess that’s what it is then. Because I’ve seen what the Serpents can do. I’m not about to bring all that down on my head.” Eric stepped back inside his apartment, slamming the door in Dave’s face, leaving him to glare at the closed door and take a swing.

“Guess I’m doing this all by myself.” Dave mused as he turned and wandered down to a shitty dive bar nearby. He needed to have a few rounds. Come up with a plan.

And a little after midnight, after finding himself a few new talkative friends in some local Ghoulies, things were starting to look up for him. And he was slowly forming a plan.

Now he just had to wait. Pick his moment. Toy with her a little more.

“I’m so close I can almost touch you, scarlet. Soon… Soon you’re going to pay for running your mouth to mommy about me...” he smirked to himself as he unlocked his hotel room and stepped inside.

[popculturebuffet]

Toons For Our Times: The Loud House: Strife of The Party/ Kernel of Truth

Lana plans her and Lola’s party with copius amonts of dirt and garabage while Lola tries sabotaging it and I struggle to figure out which one we’re supposed to be rooting for exactly.  Meanwhile Lincoln and Co find an abandoned news room and attempt to start their own news show with the immediate threat of cancelation hanging over their heads. You know like most shows on nick. Also Rusty gets hurt a lot which automatically makes this a winner. News Team Assemble, under the cut. 

Well this week was a mixed bag.. which granted could apply to this week as a whole but I meant it specifically for this episodes. Like last week one of them is a true classic that uses the series new status quo to create something intresting, and the other... is the worst episode i’ve reviwed so far. Yes not even one week and the show managed to go from having a boring episode to having a truly odious one. Both metaphorcially and literally as there’s a lot of grossout gags this time around. And unfortuantely since i’ts first in the pairing and the airing, I have to talk about it first. Pitter Patter, let’s get this over with. 

Strife of the Party I”m not exaggerating either. I admit I was hard on Schooled! and Family Bonding, but the former sitll had some good content and the latter was .. well it’s still a boring lazy retread with a bonkers ending, but I admitted to having seen worse. But “I’ve seen worse” is never the best defense. I’ll admit usually I avoided the worse episodes of the loud house. I haven’t seen some of the more infamous episodes of the show like “No Such Luck” or “Kings of the Con”.. because as just a viewer I could skip an episode if it sounded like toilet dinner. Sure i’ve still ran into them: “Study Muffin” was just eh when it aired but now both post me too and post chris savino being rightfully fired for being a harassing dickweasel thanks to said movement, it’s realy fucking creepy, has Lori at her worst (Actively trying to cheat on bobby), and .. I have no third thing. All we really got out of it was Lynn Sr’s obsession with the British. And “The Green House”’s reputation proceeds it and there’s a reason I couldn’t finish it. Point is i’ve been lucky to only step in a few cowpies in the field of this show, and now i’m watching it as it comes out i’m accepting the hard truth that with the show’s hit and miss quality, i’m going to have to go panning in shit creek some weeks if I want to find the nuggets of gold.  Now I will grant this episode doesn’t sound NEARLY as bad as “No Such Luck”.. but as opus would say....

Exactly my Pengy pal. Again not being worse than the worst episode of the show, still dosen’t make you a good episode. It just makes you marginally less terrible. It’s like saying Creed isn’t as bad as Nickelback. While tha’ts true they both still sound terrible, it’s just playing Creed isn’t a warcrime in some countries. And yes I just compared two episodes of a children’s show to bands my audience thankfully likely weren’t aware ever existed, I don’t care. If you haven’t left my blog running and screaming your either new here or tolerate me being an obscure weirdo.  

Before we get in proper, I haven’t covered the twins yet so let’s do that quick. I haven’t really watched a ton of Lola and Lana’s episodes, their not bad characters htey just don’t intrest me much as i’ve seen their gimmicks a lot, but I will say lola’s slightly better and I will say I like Lana more when she’s doing animal antics instead of grossout. Not terirble characters and their acted well, just not my cup of tea is all. Okay enough stalling , pitter patter!

We open with Lola planning the twins upcoming birthday and talking to her stuffed animals which is cute and all.. before a POSSUM CHESTBURSTS OUT OF LOLA’S UNICORN DOLL. 

The.. the fuck. Look i’m all for scaring the crap out of kids in children’s entertainment. I loved Courage the Cowardly dog as a kid and as a grown ass man writing about children’s entertainment. I love the lich from adventure time, i’m okay with scaring kids. But this is just.. a bit too realistic. Yes really. While  doll that size probably can’t fit a possum it could sure fit something else and i’ve seen stuffed animals big enough for a posssum, so yeah.. this could actually happen to one of my nieces and that thought terrifies me. It happening to me also terrifies me but I’m a grown man not a small child who’d be scarred for life. Christ.  The episode does get better, for a second I didn’t bitch for a few paragraphs for nothing. Lana comes in, claims the demon possum, and tells Lola she’ll fix the doll. Uh Lana i’m not sure she wants it back.. you’d be better off burning it and setting the possum free in a republican center’s home where it belongs. 

Anyways Lana has a good point, Lola’s been plannig their parties ‘since before they were born”.. literally as the image above shows which is just.. fucking amazing. I cannot belivie they got to go there and it’s glorious they did. I can’t think of many, if any, other chlidren’s cartoons that showed a fetus on screen so kudos. 

But yeah that was the one good moment of the episode. Next our twins go to a party suply store where Lola, clearly knowing the host well because these kids have connections, has her stash all the poop colored stuff away... which backfires as lana instead goes to the garbage for party favors and decorations. It fails to get better: Next they go to a bakery where Lana makes her own literal garbage cake and then go to flips for entertainment i.e. a bull. NOw i’ll grant both stops have good bits: The cake store guy asks if Lana’s a cop when she asks for grime and Flip has them sign a waver for the bull. And the bull being lana’s idea of entertainment makes sense.. but overal it just comes off as gross and mean spirited. I mean yes Lola’s about to do some terrible stuff herself and yes Lola ouvershadowed lana.. but she dosen’t deserve this abuse and none of this is healthy or tolerbale for.. well anyone, and could get the Loud Parents in serious trouble, which also leaves the obvious plot hole of “why don’t they step in in either situation. “ 

The episode would’ve made more snese if Lana went to them to get them to let her host the party and their guilt over letting Lola always do it means they don't’ reign her in despite wanting to. Instead their just.. there at the end for a great bit we’ll get to. It’s always the bad episodes that paint the loud parents as terrible parents honestly. No Suck Luck had them cast their son out into the cold over nonsense, On Thin Ice had Lynn Sr decide forcing his children to embarass themselves was more important than teaching one of them that maybe sometimes you don’t always get to force your family to obey your whims for dumb reasons, and the april fools eps have Lynn Sr so terrified of pranking retribution instead of you know.. GROUNDING Luann for going full joker on their asses. IN most episodes their kind and reasonable but it’s always the bad ones where they instead make Homer Simpson look like a good parent. 

But yeah my rant aside the episode COULD work if Lola, encouraged by one of her other siblings, Luann would be a good bet as she could easily slide into the party setting when appropriate without being too distracting, realizes she’s been selfish and tries to hold her tounge for lana’s sake. Maybe then she tries sabotage.. or better she DOSEN’T, but both of them realize something; Lola realizes she’s been doing this to lana their whole lives by forcing her into a party she doesn’t  like so LOLA can be happy while Lana realizes she’s being no better. Hell even if Lola did complain, which is in character, this plot woudl still work. instead.. Lana is just as bad as Lola while Lola is still pretty terrible.  See the big problem is that NEITHER girl is likeable. As I’ve made clear Lana pushes a gross, dangerous party on her sister she clearly doesn’t like, and Lola, instead of trying tot alk to her parents or get Lana to tone it down.. tries to guide her to what she wants, then when that fails sabotages the party, makes it so Lana has nothing and gets her party. Both sides are being really bad, but instead of them realizing this, lana is treated as the one we should be sympathetic to when she gets mad when she finds out about Lola even though NEITHER of them are sympathetic or likeable and deserve to win 100%. But Lana does, lana gets her way, Lola apologizes and hte paradigm just shifts from one sibling being unhappy to another. We do get that one gag I talked about where when lola goes to make things right she has Lynn Sr stall and he pulls out a cowbell “You thought I wasn’t going to need this”. No bud, Rita HOPE you wouldn’t need this. There’s a difference. Thank god it’s the end. 

Final Thoughts for Strife of the Party: They should be obvious but to be clear this is hippo excrement. i’ts not funny, it makes both it’s leads look bad, the parents look worse by inaction and  just isn’t pleasant ot watch. I do GET the show has a young audience, and they like grossout, I get i’m not the target demographic, so I probably would just be okay with a good version of this episode.. but even with that in mind both twins come off so unlikeable it’s just not fun to watch or to see Lana win as she didn’t feel like she earned it. It’s bad and it should feel bad, and i’ts the first truly odious episode i’ve had for weekly coverage. I’ve had okay or eh ones, but this one is truly bad and belongs in the pantheon of bad loud house episodes.. or at least in the honrable mentions. Good gravy this blew. 

Kernel of Truth

Okay now we’ve panned the gold nugget out of the crap creek, we can get on with the GOOD episode this week. I was excited for this one.. I was excited for both actually, even not being a huge fan of the twins I liked the idea of a loud birthday but as we just saw,.. didn’t work out so good. But this one while I thought it would just be average, promised another lincrew shenanigan and I like most of those i’ve seen, and plus I knew it’d allow me to refrence anchorman a bunch so i was llike :Fuck it let’s go”.. and this one ended up being REALLY damn good and probably one of the best episodes with this group i’ve seen, right up there with “Be Stella My Heart.” I’ts good stuff. But before we get into it you probably noticed my ranting about girl jordan but turns out, while I haven’t watched that episode, she’s in the sand field trip episode from last season hanging out with stella so I have an answer to if they forgot abotu her, they didn’t they just need to use her more, and a new ship so i’m satisfied and I apologize for bitching about it. Next time i’ll just check the wiki and see before I bitch about something. ON with the review. 

We open with our motely crew searching for a hidden Game Room rusty’s cousin claims exists, with Stellas as lookout and the guys.. er all in stacks that make it look like their doing a team up move from donkey kong country 2? 

I mean I have been playing the game a lot since it came to switch online, seriously if you have the service go play it, but i’m not hte only one seeing this right? Right.  So yeah the kid stack fails and Zach doubts Rusty’s story.. because when has rusty ever been right.. well apparently just this one time, but we’ll get to that. They even checked the boiler room. 

And then promptly vowed never to go back to the boiler room while Principal RAmierz just sighed at having to deal with a freddy kruger infestation again. They loose more children that way and the school board JUST got him out of the high school.  Liam also gets the line of the episodes when he calls the group “Fellas and Stellas” Which is just objectively amazing and needs to be used every time this group appares from now o. Luckily= Stella noticed another closed door, this one taped off instead of just with a keep out sign and the Fellas and Stellas make their way inside and find themselves in.. a news room! But it’s nto a fox news room so it actually had news in it once and not Tucker Carlson, the answer to what happens to an 80′s or 90′s yuppie scumbag villian after they fail to get the orphange paved over for condos

Anyway, our heroes alll ohhh and all while Zach thinks this is where children are harvested. Nah Zach they just call them up on the pa system.

So everyone does what’s natural to them: Zach and Liam inspect the cameras, Stella looks at the old mic because she’s a natural for being an on camera personality and Rusty.. oggles an old group shot of the news team. You know I may not hate him with the hatred of a hundred suns, but he’s still objectively the worst. Zach gets mad at him over it because “That’s my mom”. Rusty defends himself by calling her hot and while th. no please god no dont’ talk about women like that you creepy little weatherbeaten Chucky doll that somehow became a real boy, or had dustin diamond transfer his soul into it befrore he died. Either is possible. The point is Ewww. The other point is while Rusty’s being his usual living proof of while he’ll die alone Zach has no right to get upset , AT FIRST because how the hell would Rusty know that’s hsi mom. You two have the combined braincell of a dead feret. Stella is the only one out of all 6 of you evenmy boy liam who has more than one brain cell. This argument is stupid and I hate you both,  just settle things in the most humane way possible.. or at least THIS is what I consider the most humane way possible. 

So while those two are being as stupid as expected, Lincoln suggets fixing the place and becoming the new school news crew. I mean they’d need new equipment since even if the stuff there still works’ it’s all worn out 80′s tech none of you know how to use but given their seen with a modern camera later int he episode, I assume they just sold this off and got new cameras. Even if the show flopped, more on that in a minute, the principal could still use those for other projects so it’s a win win. Stella Zhau agrees.. and FINALLY has a last name. Like holy shit i’ve been waiting a full season for this and it feels like that bit was JUST to give her a last name. Now they just need to do Liam but still, I needed this one more. Plus it also means we can now firmly say she’s chinese. Neat!

So after that blockbuster reveal Stella wonders where Rusty is, because fuck if I know, and they all find him continuing to oggle zach’s mom at their age....

Zach snatches it away and crumples up understandably annoyed. Rusty’s response is about what you’d expect. 

So once Liam’s done throwing that calender into the school furnace, and saying hi to freddy as he passes the boiler on the way, our team heads to the principal to plead their case. They run into Meryl, the identical in personality, plot function and apperance outside of wearing pink instead of yellow to Cheryl, the receptionest at the elementary school who I really liked and it’s a clever way to keep the character at both schools and pays off the runnig gag of Cheryl asking liincoln or clyde who looks better her or her sister by having said sister show up and ask the same. Good stuff. 

Meryl ends up agreeing to let them go see the wizard, I mean Principal Rameriz, because her soap is on. Also clyde’s a fan to his friends blank stares. Come on guys he watches romance movies, of course he’s going to love drama shows, even the non teen ones. I now imagine he joins the loud sisters on their riverdale nights. Riverdale the clusterfuck that has something for all of them: Teen drama and shirtless hunks for Lori and Leni, Music and scantly clad “teens’ of both genders and neither gender for Luna, something to laugh at for Luann who probably loves mst3king stuff, and violence for Lucy.. dosen’t seem like it’d be Lynn’s thing honestly but I rest my case. Also the rest of the sisters are too young but the parents figure Lucy’s desentised enough to violence and blind enough to sex to make an exception. 

Now that fun headcanons out of the way our heroes pitch the principal whose skeptical, as the 80′s news show ended because it was boring, much like why that 80′s show ended. That and it was a bunch of 80′s pop culture refrences strung together. I do have a minor nitpick that it seems odd a school room would be in disuse for this long, but given the Principal has apparently spent years looking for aformetioned game room as we find out in the end, the school blueprints are apparnelty lost to the ages or if they exist are some sort of ancient treasure map buried beneath the school drawn in blood by an old witch. I mean this universe has cherry hating peach loving spies now, i’ not ruling anything out. 

But our heroes beg them: Clyde has journalism experince on the school paper, Stella has the dedication and heart and Rusty .. thinks people need to see his face on camera. Rusty as far as we know your face functions like the vdieo from the ring and everyone in school is going to die 7 days after seeing it on film. That’s my theroy and i’m sticking to it. Thankfully everyone else is just as annoyed with him as me for once, and we get the glorious shot above of everyone just looking.. done with his antics and wondering why they keep him around. Finally for once I agree iwth the characters on something rusty related. Let’s show that agian. 

Poetry. You can just feel the levels of “So done with this crap” seeping from every poor.. except for Poor Lincoln who just wishes his best friends and rusty woudl stop using him as furniture, and Liam whose covered but probably very much on team “Rusty Stop Being Yourself your blowing this for us”. They even have an action news pose.. which is botha dorable and breaks the principal’s bust of herself, so she relucntantly agrees to get them out of there. Plus as I said there’s really no loss for her here. If their sucessful the school gets a new elective, something to put on the tv’s every morning, a way to do announcments so she dosen’t have to, and free good publicity for her next bonus. If not.. then she has somehwere to store her new cameras she can use for other stuff, and come up with something else to do with the media lab. Either way she wins. Plus iwth phones and stuff noawaydays they only need the one new camera.  Okay before we move on confession time: I was on a school tv news show’s crew myself. Not in middle school, we werne’te that lucky but in high school we had video media, an elective where seniors edited news segments and what not for the school’s WhamTV program. I hope i’ts still around honestly. I started on a field crew doing stories but my awkardenss and a blow up at my partner where my awkward rage prone ass threatned him by accident, got me bumped to doing credits.. which I genuinely loved. I got to something fun, creative and unique, I was still part of hte intros every week, and I got plenty of time to goof off and watch videos. It’s how I found channel awesome and first got to watch atop the fourth wall since it wasn’t on youtube back then, back before you know, it turned out Doug was abusing all of them and younger me was just unaware of it. But it was still good times so this episode does feel a bit nostalgic for me. But enough teary eyed reminciings of ten years ago, back to the plot. Our heroes air their newscast. It’s the Middle School Action News with with your Anchors Lincoln Loud and Clyde McBride, Stella Zhao in the field, Rusty Spokes on Sports for.. some reason, Cameraman Liam Wedon’tknowhislastname and Zach Gurdle somewhere out of the way. Middle School Action News, always on, always free.. no wiat tha’ts pluto. Middle School Action News, Taste the rainbow. Middle School Action News.. The Good Guys Always Win, Even in The 80′s. Yeah that’ll do! 

But yeah while our heroes try their best, and to their credit this does feel like a middle school news show. The writers not our heroes. Anyways Lincoln and Clyde banter and we get our first segment Stella trying to interview mr. Bohlmer about his birthday.. which goes about as well as doing anything for him on ron swansons’ birthday. 

Next we have Rusty on sports.. which I questioned when I first say this but as obonxious as Rusty can be.. yeah this is the best place to have him. Stella has the drive and the talent to be their field reporter, Clyde and Lincoln have a lifelong report that does well for the desk, Liam is nice and patient enough for camera work, and Zach is a paranoid weirdo so he probably has experince editing since thats where I assume where he is since htey ddon’t do weather and even if they did Liam’s just not the right shade of oblivoiusly nuts. 

I do however at least get why they keep him around as Rusty needs someone to get fed up with him.. but as the above moment showed Clyde and Stella can do that easily, as can Lincoln, so he really has no functional purpose other than as a B-Grade dale gribble. ANd I know kids don’t know who that is but they frankly deserve better. Seriously Zach...

Okay getting back to the segement. For starters Rusty does a breath spray first.. but suprisingly despite interviewing a lady, specifically Lynn, he DOSEN’T hit on her and is actually professional and manages to get a quote despite her disintrest. LIke I know it’s the bare minimum but you’ve met rusty right? the Bare Minimum is hard for him to grasp. Earlier this episode he was oggling old pictures of his friends mom and saying he should take it as a compliment which, Hard No. So the fact hours later he’s talking to a woman without radiating creep after that is an achivment. For him and him alone mind you, most kids should know better. But still I may be hard on the kid, because DAMN is it fun and damn if he dosen’t give me plenty of joke fodder, but I will give him credit even if it’s the bare minmum. Good job rust you passed the very basic plateau of human decency. 

Stella wraps things up with a look at the cafteria that’s about what you’d expect from a kids cartoon, shoe int he beans etc. Unfortuantley bean shoes, sportz and angry assholes aren’t enough to float the show and the principal is ready to can it.  On hte bright side they have their first lawsuit from Mr. Bohlmer. I mean John Olvier idnd’t start getting sued by dickheads with no real case till he was 30, nicely done kids. And it’s not even why, it’s just boring and the kids aren’t enjoying it. So Stella, being again the one with her own brain cells here, proposes to let them find a big story, and Ramirez reluctantly but graciously agrees. And that’s why I like her so far. Don’t get me wrong having Steven Tobolowsky as principal was great, but I like Rameriz better: she’s smart, weary of the crap she puts up with and tough but fair.. which is a cliche btu fits here: She’ll be honest with her kids but will give them an honest chance and sees our news team really doees want this bad and her giving htem one more day to find something actally intresting is more than fair.  So our heroes spitball about what to do for news. LIam suggests alien because again he has about one character trait, so everyone tells him for hte last time no. I mean it isn’t much worse than his last suggestion. 

So once agian it’s RUSTY who saves the day, bringing in beet snacks.. which he tries to get them not to stone him over over the fact the popcorn was all gone.. which okay 1) I get the show’s tring to be healthy so maybe ther’es not chips, but I have a hard time buying that there’s no Chez Its, snack packs or other goodies between “Popcorn’ and “something with beetz that only two men would eat” For the record those two men are Dwight Schrute, for obvious reasons, and this guy my boy Tony Chu. 

I highly recommend this comic, Chew for the record, to anyone. Just.. anyone whose not a children it gets voilent, but it is sublime. We’re not here for that, but I thought i’d plug it. It also has a spinoff currently running, Chu, following his criminal sister. Also real good and dosen’t really spoil anything for hte main series thus far so you can hop in there instead. Either way your in for a ride.  Back on topic, while Rusty failed with snacks he actually brings up a good point: The popcorn isn’t just gone because it’s late in the school day, but because as the kids notice, it’s just missing in general despite the trucks arriving. They have their story and head out to investigate.  And suprisingly, unlike last week’s investigation they find something: A mysterious hooded figure bribing the driver for popcorn, and taking it off somewhere. They fail to catch her, as Rusty dives over her telling Liam to “Make sure you get this”.. he instead gets a shrub and video of him attacking a shrub. I’ts a good runner and shows the writers are leanring to use Rusty better.  They take the footage to the principal, who is impresssed, but states they need to find out who dun it for the story to be complete which is fair enough. They stalk out the nexxt delivery time later that night, but find the drivers have been switched and the mystery person has fled to canada. Rusty once again tries catching her and fall sin the water. Liam once again responds with a cheerful “Don’t worry rusty I got it”.. okay this dynamic is honestly better than him and Zach: Cheerful oblivious Liam and scheming dumbass rusty. Why isn’t THIS the “Those Two Guys” dynamic in the group, honestly. 

Anyways Lincoln is dispondent the next day as iwth no leads, they have no programa nd prepares to do a spider-man no more with his anchorsuit.. which okay 1) you can use that for other things man. Peter Parker can’t really use a spider-man suit for anything but spider-manning but you can use that suit for dates and dances and stuff. and 2).. whya re he and the clyde the only ones with outfits? I mean.. it’s clear from this episode there will be more school news stories nad it just looks weird that they get to play dressup in suits but the rest of the crew isn’t. Liam at leat is working the camera and Zach is Zach but rusty and Stella are field reporters. Field reporters, while not always, usually get nice suits too guys. 

ANyways Lincoln finds something in the garbage. And not his sister this time, as Lana oscar the grouched it up lat episode in sadness. Which to be fair will be her future career mark my words. At least I think that’s a career. Anyways, our heros find a ferry ticket meaning whoever fled to Canada is in the building. They trail some popcorn from the ticket to the locked door from earlier, which Rusty, finishing the rule of three, tries knocking it down hwile Liam gets it. Stella, again proving to be the real hero of this tale, uses her hair as a lockpick. Is.. is there anythign this child can’t do? She and Marcy should swap notes sometime damn. 

And the culprit is MERYL! She was using the popcorn for insulation to get a quite room to herself and begs the kids not to tell which. is the weaker part of the episode> We don’t have the investment in Meryl we do in Cheryl, and she did you know.. steal school property.. or at least buy it off under the table. But the kids being the sweet kids they are understandably, schemes or not don’t want her  to loose her job, and agree to not tell on her even if they loose their show. And to their creid and what keeps this from sinking the episode Meryl is genuinely greatful for this gesture, and gives them the scoop.  And as i’ve been mentioning turns out RUSTY WAS RIGHT. Yes Rusty. That Rusty. Was Right about something. The Game Room exists. They find it thorugh a hidden locker entrance and unlock it from the inside, with af lodo of viewers coming in. Granted at first I didn’t know why Meryl didn’t just use this room but then I thought “Oh yeah she’s a full grown adult and can’t fit in the entrance and i’m assuming it was locked from the other side to the rest of the school”. So the kids have a new hangout and as the principal joins them, they havea  show! Turns out she’d been looking for this place for years.. and doesn’t turn it into something else. What a legend. She plays Air Hockey with Meryl, is there something going on there or are my shipping goggles acting up.. probably both. Anyways our heroes have genuine thanks, a fun new hangout at school, their own headquarters and their own news show. It’s a heck of a day but it’s no time to rest as Rusty tells them he has another tip and i’ts off... to pick up a broom to sweep up the gumball machine they knock over.. THEN they can go find the hot tub for the teachers lounge. 

Final Thoughts:  OH me mow, this was a great one. For one the main complaint I had I mentioned at Schooled! of it not feeling like Lincoln’s friends were given enough personality sometimes? Gone enitrely. Everyone except Clyde and Zach get a moment and Clyde is still fully present and has gotten several focus episodes at this point, while Zach again should just leave already. But the rest of them? All on form. Stella continues to prove her competence, energy and adorability, Rusty is not only actually useful for once but was actually really funny his episode. The gag with Zach’s mom was actually pretty hilarious, my jabs at him aside, and the runner of him trying to do some epic stunt, telling Liam to film it and then humiliating himself while his pal cheerfully tells him he got it is just great and Lincoln’s Spider-Man no more moment with his suit was both said and kinda funny and I love him and Clyde’s reporter outfits. It’s why I wanted everyone to have them, especially since this will be a recurring theme and looks to be a fun one. It was fun, creative, and took me back a decade. It was a REALLY damn good one and I’m glad I watched this one first, a true highlight of the series and a true good sign that the season can, even with some hiccups, will apparnetly have some REALLY great episodes on average even with the weaker ones.  That’s it for this week... and somehow for loud house coverage as, for now, their doesn’t’t seem to be any new episodes in October, but that could change. Until then, follow this blog every Monday for regular ducktales coverage and come back in October for more loud house, more the Casagrandes  and some spooky spooky fun Until then, Go team venture.