#I just really love that man and every part of him

[nu-suave]

WHO FALLS FIRST, WHO FALLS HARDER? feat. satoru, nanami, sukuna

word count: 866

summary: what it says on the tin - someone falls first, the other falls harder. a/n: considering writing a part two of this with choso, toji & higuruma

You fall first, Satoru falls harder. Listen, Satoru is notoriously hard at opening his heart to people - you engage in some harmless flirting at first, which quickly turns genuine for you. So genuine it hurts, actually, every honeyed word associated with a visceral need to admit, I really like you, Satoru. It’s a dizzying feeling at first, that quickly transforms into a nurtured comfort; a warmth in your chest whenever he calls, something that has you kicking your feet when he invites you out, a constant happiness whenever you’re together. Liking Satoru becomes as easy as breathing, when you’ve loved him long enough.

Satoru doesn’t pick up on it. He just… does his thing. He attaches himself to you like a flea to a cat (though, you find it much more endearing) and encroaches on your space, carves a place for himself in your life. He acts as he finds natural, until suddenly it isn’t natural; suddenly, he’s staring you dead in the eyes, and it hits him like a fist to the face. He wants to spend the rest of his life with you. And because Satoru can’t be casual a day in his life, his behaviour immediately switches to accommodate that. He disappears from your life for a week straight out of shock - and horror, he’s ashamed to say, for allowing himself to fall in love - and then reappears on your doorstep after giving you the fright of you life, car keys dangling in his fingers as he tells you he booked a restaurant for you two to have dinner. 

Nanami falls first, you fall harder. You’re the mundanity he’s been craving for years. Not in that you’re boring or dull, but that liking you comes so natural to him. You become the embodiment of everything he wants; you’ll grab your groceries together, take time out of your day to chat everyday, and every time a new cafe catches your eye, the other is the first one either of you go to. It’s a natural progression with Nanami. One day, you’re friends that text every few days. Next thing you notice, you’re looking back on that and thinking it weird you ever used to be so distant. You send each other a text every morning, have plans every fortnight, know most things about each other’s lives - what happened in your day, how things are going with your friends, you’re both in contact with the other’s family. Liking you means Nanami shares his life with you, and in doing so, it loses its unappeal - you make him look forward to tomorrow.

It hits you one day, out of the blue. Flowers that he bought you are sitting on your coffee table. A spare toothbrush (his toothbrush) sits in the bathroom beside your own. A book lies neatly bookmarked on your kitchen counter that you haven’t ever touched. There’s an entire section of your closet dedicated to his clothes, and he’s routinely stopping by your place to pick up the ties he’s left behind - you have the same predicament. You look around your room, eyes wide with every part of Nanami that lives in there, and you realise; holy shit. I’ve been in love with this man for months.

You fall first. Sukuna, on the other hand, opens his eyes one day to realise he’s already there. He’s a hard person to love at first, and you readily admit that. The first few weeks, with your feelings blossoming like a newly born flower in your chest, you swear up and down that you do not like him. Then your feelings intensify, and they just grow stronger and stronger as every day passes. His dull looks when he’s bored become endearing, the way he crosses his arms when he’s disappointed charming, the handsome grin that sweeps his features when you somehow, miraculously, beat him at a game of chess enchanting. Things you previously didn’t bat an eye at become something worth note about him. Then, as if you’re not already hopelessly besotted enough, he starts making advances.

Sukuna wakes up one day and his first thought that morning is to seek you out to spend breakfast together. His second is a question: when did you become such a fixture in his life? The third is a realisation of, right, he must be in love with you. Then he stretches his arms above his head, accepts this as a simple fact of life, and seeks you out for breakfast. That’s how he perceives it, at least. The way he’d stare at you, already tender, turns into something flustering - his second pair of eyes stay on you constantly and, once you notice, it’s impossible to miss. He demands your attention more freely, no longer bothering with poor cover-ups. You share all meals together, where once he goes so far as to insist you hand feed him fruit. He tells Uraume to cook your favourite meal when he notices you’re distressed, even if he secretly hates it. He’s more open with his affection, freely grabbing you or touching you or leaning into his space. Everything about him just amplifies, suddenly enough to leave you dizzy; you fluster under the attention.

hi.

[theoldsports]

SOLUTION.

Art Donaldson x Reader | 5k words

SORRY SERIES LINK.

warnings: pregnancy, implied discussion of abortion, a boy groveling on his knees for his family, there’s a dog (a real one, not just Art), talk about Art’s forced weird athletic borderline disordered eating.

okay, i lied last time. THIS is my best work. this is very out of my brain and i hope you love it. holy shit.

Have you ever sat and listened to a leaky faucet? I mean, really listened?

Steady. Like a heartbeat, if you think about it.

Sometimes, though, if the leak is slow enough, it’s more like the kind of heart rate that sends the nurse with the crash-cart sweeping into the room to shock you out of an AFIB pattern. Or however that worked.

[Y/N] was listening to it. The dripping. The kitchen sink. It hadn’t stopped for days. When it began, it was steady. Now, it was irregular. It started the day Art left

Art had been away at an early season tournament. [Y/N] had an impossible work week, so Art had told her he was happy to go for the better part of the week on his own. They both knew Art really did hate to be alone in situations like that. He had always had one of his people there. His mom, Patrick, [Y/N]; one of them was in his corner at these things. This time, he was truly on his own. Art could not stand to travel alone. He had his team of physios and coaches, but not his family. [Y/N] was going to swing by and surprise him at the end, but her boss had leaned into her for trying to take more days off during release season for the big summer blockbusters. Plus, someone did have to watch the dog.

This context about Art’s being away is important. It’s not that Art was the epitome of a handyman, but he really liked to feel like he was contributing to their home’s ecosystem when a lightbulb went out or a switch needed replacing. The man was incredible with the small things. Yet, [Y/N] sat at the kitchen table with a frown on her face, trying to rough in an outline for an article. With the faucet dripping. If Art were there, or if she was with Art three states over, the faucet wouldn’t be dripping against the porcelain basin.

It wasn’t like the wifi signal was strong enough anywhere else on the property for her to up and move either.

drip drip drip. Said the faucet.

[Y/N] was damn near the point where she was going to run upstairs to the bedroom and get the baseball bat Art kept with the express purpose of running down the stairs in his briefs and cracking up on possible intruders. All she could think about was bringing the wood down against the glass and cheap metal on her kitchen counter.

A new house would have a working sink and a bathroom counter that wasn’t too small and a halfway decent wifi signal.

Instead, [Y/N] set her face down upon the cool blue faux granite countertop. The temperature helped ease the feeling of the hyperbolic corkscrew being driven between her eyes. The dripping kept dripping and [Y/N] wanted to cry.

This agony wasn’t all the sink’s fault, though.

[Y/N] saw on the tennis channel before she even got a call from Art that he’d won that weekend. He still hadn’t called. The lack of a call from made her feel ashamed. Not a soul there to celebrate the success with him. She felt an immense sense of guilt slide across her skin because she wasn’t there to witness that smile he got when he won. Sweaty and angry, but relieved every time. He still got that look when he won. Art was a machine on the court, and a competitor not worth counting out at this point in his career. He still looked surprised and delighted every time he, of all people, hit the winner. [Y/N] loved that look. Art loved how she would celebrate with him after a win, too.

[Y/N] prayed Art made his flight without delay that evening. Selfishly, because she wanted her boy back. Also because Art was mortally terrified of airplanes. Planes made him feel out of control due to lack of trust with the pilot. Without that phone call from him, [Y/N] was scared knowing he was out on his own and that he likely felt anxious enough to give a horse a heart attack. She would have no way of knowing if something had happened between the match end and now.

She did know that the sink was leaking.

She also knew her period was two weeks late.

That, Art couldn’t fix on his own. In fact, it was fairly obvious that the delay was more or less Art’s fault.

[Y/N] hadn’t yet taken a pregnancy test at that time. If she took the time to take one, it would make everything the obvious answer a reality she would have to deal with. She had scares before. Ones that she had never, and would never, tell Art about. She would wait for her delayed—not missed!—period and everything would be fine. Like the other times. It had to be fine.

She checked her phone. It was a blue slidephone with small rhinestone stickers she had applied to the back. Still nothing from Art. He said he would call first right after the match, but he still hadn’t actually called, so maybe it was time to call first. It had been hours since he said he’d ring up. It wasn’t a major concern that Art would blow her off. Ideas of danger and uncertainties flooded her head.

“I’m the one that wants marriage so bad. Not Artie. What if he says no? Or not now…?”

[Y/N] sat on the beach with her back against Patrick’s shins. Art and [Y/N] were completing their first year completely post college. [Y/N] and Patrick were twenty-four and Art was almost twenty-four. His November birthday set him behind.

Patrick’s hands were on her shoulders and his body in a beach chair behind her while they both stared off over ocean as the sun set. “You’re actually stupid if you think he’ll deny you, [Y/N].”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to step on his game, or whatever. The guy is supposed to ask. Isn’t this going to be… emasculating or something?”

“Emasculating for Art? For pretty baby? Yeah, okay,” Patrick teased. [Y/N] threw a fistful of sand at him. “Christ, okay, okay. Cool it.” He spit.

Art had run back up toward to hotel to grab his water bottle, while Patrick and [Y/N] stayed at the dunes. [Y/N] wanted to propose to Art by trip’s end. She thought it would be sweet. Art was extremely forward when it came to her her, but he hadn’t been forward about the whole proposal business. He seemed scared about marriage. [Y/N]he would do it herself.

She was grateful for the time alone with her best friend too. Sitting and doing nothing, or partying. Either was more than welcome. “He’s not going to say no,” Patrick continued. His mouth casually leaned close to her ear. “Because it’s insane how whipped you’ve got him.”

“Don’t say that—“

“He wants to have your babies. Ask him. Trust me, he’ll say yes and he will be all the hell over you.” His fingers worked into [Y/N]’s shoulders, feeling the tension there. He took his hands off of her when Art came running down the beach.

[Y/N] heard a click in the lock. Her head flopped to the left, still pressed against the counter, to glance at the door. Her heart rate increased. She was so tired and the speed of the situation so fast, that she didn’t both moving or attempting to defend herself.

Most fortunately, when the door swung open, it was her Art. The sun was going down behind him. He looked a bit ragged and had a racket bag over one shoulder and two duffels in the other hand. She sat upright sharply on the kitchen barstool. “Pretty baby!”

All Art’s gear hit the floor. The door was left open behind him (taking a big chance that their Labrador mix, Cheese, didn’t run down the stairs and bolt out and away). Art walked toward [Y/N], arms extending. His strong arms pulled [Y/N] in close to his chest. She rested her head against his soft gray t-shirt. Her own arms embraced him back and one of her hands tucked comfortably into the back pocket of his jeans. “[Y/N]… I missed you.” Art said into her hair.

“I missed you… I-I… You didn’t call. How did you get here—“

“Final match actually started on time, so I gambled on moving my flight to the earlier one. I didn’t have time to call if I was taking the early one. I should’ve texted. I got nervous with the-the flight. I’m sorry. Forgive me?”

[Y/N] leaned back to look at him. There was no more welcome sight in the world than Art Donaldson. Irish genetics saw to it that Art was freckled from the spring sun. With shaggy hair boyishly covered by a baseball cap tipping back dangerously, he practically glowed. Even though he looked like shit. His sunglasses were hanging on his shirt. [Y/N/] tilted her head up, signaling for a kiss. Hungrily, Art leaned forward to take as many kisses as he wanted. His lips tasted like spearmint gum. Like always.

Cheese did run downstairs when Art’s hand climbed up the side of [Y/N]’s throat and when her own hand started to squeeze from under the fabric of Art’s back left pants pocket. Art had to pull regretfully away to grab Cheese by the collar and shut the front door.

Delightedly, Art did gteet Cheese with ear-scratches and a belly rub. Art received the customary licks and a tailwags in return. Cheese was always pretty down when the whole family wasn’t together. He walked and played a bit, but when his dad wasn’t around, Cheese kind of deflated. He had spent most of the time laying flat on Art’s side of the bed. It was obvious the dog was grieving the disappearance of his boy.

When Art bent down to pat his beloved Cheese, [Y/N] stood from her chair and bent at the waist. She pulled Art’s hat off and set it on the counter. Gently, she kissed Art on top of the head. With a scratch not unlike the ones he gave to the canine to the back of Art’s neck, the man looked up at her from the ground with a half-smile.

“Congrats, baby,” [Y/N] said. Art cut his eyes curiously from her to the tennis channel on the TV playing in the next room. That had him realizing where she would have gotten the information of his win from so efficiently. “How was the tournament? I’m sorry I couldn’t—“

“Sure, sure, but I bet Cheese here is pretty glad you were home,” Art said and stood up with one final pat to Cheese’s flank. “The whole thing was great. I… I’m kind of surprised I won, if I’m being honest.” Art said, wrapping an arm around [Y/N]’s waist.

Naturally, her hands flattened against his toned chest when he tugged her towards him. “I’m not. You’re fucking good at tennis, Art.”

His ears reddened in embarrassment as he tucked his face into [Y/N]’s neck to hide his face. Art was used to praise and loved it more than anything, no matter where it came from. Every compliment from [Y/N] was worth a hell of a lot more. Art hated thinking about why that was the case. He knew why, though. She had seen he and Patrick play and even then thought Art was good. Art still won the match when it came to [Y/N] and he would never tell her that.

“Hush…” He mumbled into her neck, planting a biting, teasing kiss there. She laughed. He laughed. “I played against an eighteen year old kid yesterday. He played really well,” Art leaned back to look at her again. “You saw, I’m sure,” he indicated the TV with a nod. “He would’ve won this weekend if I hadn’t won that match. Just… I’m twenty-six. Made me feel old.”

“…Glad you won, then.”

“I said if I hadn’t…”

“Well, if you’re sooooo down on your win then congrats on flying home all by yourself like a big boy.” [Y/N] smirked.

“Oh, you’re gonna be like that, huh?” Art withdrew his hands from his wife’s body and put them teasingly on his own hips.

[Y/N] nodded. “Yeah. If you’re old, imagine how I feel.”

“Ancient, probably.”

Art leaned in for another kiss. She pushed him back playfully. “No! You called me old!” [Y/N] laughed.

She leaned one way, then the other to avoid Art’s beautifully wrinkled nose and smiling mouth. “Please? I’m sorry, I’m sorry! You’re-you’re not old!” Art said and attempted to trap her with his arms and give her a kiss.

[Y/N] turned hard over her shoulder and ran up the stairs. Cheese gave a woof from the couch when Art chased after her. Art spent his life chasing after her.

“No! You can’t kiss me! Doghouse! Bad Art! Bad!” [Y/N] accused jokingly. Art jumped up the stairs. He took them two and three at a time.

Art backed her against the bathroom door. Nowhere left to run. His rough hands settled on her hips. “Gotcha. You’re pretty fast for an old lady, y’know. Late for bingo, or—“ Art smirked when he leaned in to kiss her.

[Y/N] shut him up with a kiss. She had missed his stupid boy babbling. His mouth was soft against hers. Art put one of his hands on the wooden door beside her face to hold himself up. The other hand found her belt loop, keeping her body close to his.

“I love you,” Art whispered between kisses. “I love you so much, honey. I missed you.”

[Y/N]’s head leaned back against the door with a soft thud. Her breath caught in her throat. “I love you t—mmh!” Art leaned in for another kiss.

The joy of being Art Donaldson’s wife was that he never got tired of touching her, or being physically close. Sometimes, [Y/N] would look over at him while she was writing, or making dinner, and he would be staring, or slowly extending his hand to her and seeing how long it took for [Y/N] to acknowledge his presence. It never ceased to make her feel beautiful. “Can we…” his fingers danced over the button on her jeans.

“Can we what…?” She asked coyly.

Art blushed, but smirked and lowered his lips by [Y/N] ear. “Can we fuck? Please?” He asked too politely for as dirty as those words were. Like the good midwestern boy that he was.

She tipped her head back further. Art kissed her neck with all the energy he could muster. “Can I not make you dinner first? You-you a cheap whore as well as old now, too?” [Y/N] jeered. Art snorted a laugh. The warm air from the giggle spread over [Y/N]’s skin, causing goosebumps to raise. “I’m never letting you leave home alone again, then.”

Art nodded against her skin, sucking and licking a spot they both new would bruise dark. The sound she let out was absolutely disgusting and Art loved it. “I would prefer to never be let out of your sight, personally.” He said when he pulled away.

“Come on, house boy… We’re havin’ dinner. And you’re gonna eat some bread,” [Y/N] said, pointing a finger at Art’s chest. He started to put up a fight about the ultra-low nonexistent amount of inactive carbs he was eating during the season, but [Y/N] kept chattering. “Stop talking. Your brain doesn’t work right without carbs. Braindead. Come on, dinner.”

“You’re bad for me.”

“I know.” [Y/N] smiled.

Normally, [Y/N] drank a cup of coffee when the pair made dinner. Art knew the pattern. He made her the cup of coffee every time. It sat mostly unfinished that night, though. She found herself heating and reheating it in the microwave as they cooked. She started to space out as he recapped the tournament in full detail, as she requested. If Art noticed, he didn’t let on. [Y/N] noticed, though. Little stood between her and coffee. She didn’t want to drink it. That was violently unusual.

“Hey, I’m gonna go piss. Can you—“

“Watch the sauce?” Art asked, indicating the creamy pesto she had on the stove while Art cleaned and cut vegetables.

“Mhm.” [Y/N] confirmed. Art slid over to take the spoon from her. He placed a hand at the bottom of her back as she walked away. Art fit perfectly into her life. It wasn’t fair how right he was for her.

She went to the upstairs bathroom instead of the downstairs one. She hoped that didn’t set off Art’s sixth sense about the way-things-had-to-be. Once upstairs, [Y/N] wasted no time yanking open the medicine cabinet behind the mirror. It was overflowing, naturally. Makeup, supplements, condoms, hair ties, pill bottles, loose painkillers. It was a disaster. There was also a pregnancy test.

A laughing Art had given it to [Y/N] as a joke the morning after their wedding night and she had hit him hard enough to bruise across the chest. The test sat wrapped and in the box behind the mirror every day since. Just in case.

[Y/N] had officially arrived at just in case.

She gingerly tossed the empty box under the sink so Art wouldn’t see it without looking for it. Then, [Y/N] undid the buttons on her overalls and, well, took the test.

Lacking the time to sit and watch it come back positive or negative, [Y/N] tossed the clean cap on the stick, slid it into the pocket of her overalls, washed her hands and went downstairs like nothing was wrong.

Except she knew something was wrong. Now she felt like she had a loaded gun in her pocket. She was too cautious with her movements due to the fear that the test would slip out of her front right pocket in front of Art.

She was damn near about to step into the pantry and shut the door just to see if the pee stick had one line or two. If he wasn’t already suspicious, that would do it. [Y/N] felt that the anxiety created was easily the worst anxiety she had ever had. Oops.

[Y/N] got quiet. She was talking less and listening more. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but she was a chatterbox. Art would notice her blanched face and wrinkled brow eventually, she worried.

Ever the perceptive bastard, Art did. When he sat beside [Y/N] at the counter to eat a bowl of pasta with more inactive carbs than he had eaten in six months, he kept cutting his eyes at her. His bare foot nudged her ankle. Her dish was relatively untouched. “You good, babe? You’re being weird.”

“I’m not being weird.”

“You are being weird because you’re not being you. I’ve barely asked you how you’re doing with all the excitement. Long day?” Art asked, setting down his fork to drag his hand across the back of her shoulders.

“Yeah, a bit.” [Y/N] said. What she meant to say was I have a pregnancy test and I bet it is positive in my pocket right now and I’m so terrified that I can practically smell my pit stains right now, baby. But she didn’t say that.

Art spun to face her, taking in her expression and demeanor. There was that contemplative knot perched between his eyebrows. The back of his hand landed calmly on [Y/N]’s forehead to check her temperature. “Art…” [Y/N] said, pushing his hand down.

“No, hang on.” Art said firmly. He tried to put his hand back on her face. Instead, not having a clue what it said, [Y/N] reached into her front right pocket and slammed the pregnancy test down between them. Art retracted his hand and flinched back a bit at the sudden movement. The test was face down on the counter.

Art’s eyes cut from the test back to her. His face was suddenly very solemn. “Are you—“

“—I dunno. I didn’t-I couldn’t look. It’s been in my pocket for twenty minutes. No idea.”

“Do you think you are?”

[Y/N] shrugged and looked at her bowl. It looked too green. sick sick sick. drip drip drip said the faucet.

“Do you want to know if you are?” Art asked wide-eyed. “I want to know, personally. Do… Do you?”

Again, [Y/N] shrugged. “If we don’t look, it’s not real.”

“…That’s stupid.” Art shook his head.

“You’re stupid.”

Art sighed. “I’m gonna look. I mean, I’m going to turn it over,” his eyes frantically reached for [Y/N]’s. He grabbed her hand with his to get her attention. “I’m going to look. Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah.” She whispered and it was okay.

And she was pregnant.

Two blue lines stared at them.

“Fuck.” [Y/N] said. She felt both elated and humiliated. She wanted so badly to be a mother. She wanted to cry. How could they keep it? The timing was wrong. She hadn’t agreed to this. The two of them had so many fights about it. She barely understood how this happened. She thought they were being so careful. It didn’t make any sense. Every precaution she could think of had been taken at one point or another.

And the fucking faucet was still dripping. She could hear it. drip drip drip. Over and over.

“Fuck.” She said sliding out of her chair and standing unsteadily. That wasn’t the result one should feel when they get something they have spent so long wanting.

Art ran his hands through his hair. He knew he shouldn’t be smiling when she looked so worried. His face betrayed the wide smile he hoped to hide. That’s exactly what he wanted to see. Fuck.

“Honey… Hey, hey. You’re okay. This is awesome. C’mere.” Art said like he was diffusing a bomb. His arm were wide open to hold her.

“Art…”

“No, uh-uh. Just come here. Please.”

Cautiously, [Y/N] made her way into her favorite pair of arms in the world. “It’s not supposed to be like this.” [Y/N] choked out as Art held her.

“Shh, I know, I know,” Art said calmly. His left hand’s fingers brushed her hair away from her face. “But that’s how it is now. We have to accept that and solve for the next move, right?” It was silent for a while after that. [Y/N]’s arms were tightly wrapped around Art’s shoulders and their bowls of pasta were certainly cold. She felt that she had ruined everything.

She glanced at Art’s face. The small smile betrayed him. “Art… We can’t. Not now.” she had told Art not now so many times that it felt forced and rehearsed. Now that [Y/N] that was actually pregnant, she wanted nothing more than to stay pregnant. The timing was far from good. She had articles that were still very due the next day. She had a husband who very much traveled often for work (who she traveled with too). She had Cheese, who was staring at her weird over the back the couch because he didn’t understand crying.

“What do you mean we can’t?” Art said quietly. “We-We can. We… have. We are… Actively.” He fumbled.

“We can. We did! But… You know now’s not a good time, baby.” [Y/N] countered weakly.

Art’s hands never left [Y/N]’s waist. “Let’s run pros and cons.”

“Pretty baby.” She said accusatorially. Good old analytic Art…

“Let’s run pros and cons.” Art repeated unflinchingly. He sprang up off of his barstool to gather a sharpie and a legal pad from some drawer. Art uncapped the marker harshly with his teeth. Cap between his teeth still, he asked: “Do you want it?” while he found a clean, smooth page.

Before she could respond with her head, [Y/N] responded with her heart. She nodded a yes to him immediately. “Do you?”

Art capped the back end of the marker to free up his mouth. “More than anything ever, I think. It would probably kill me a little bit, actually, if… Yeah. I understand and it’s all up to you, honey, but… Yeah.” His hand created a PRO column and a CON column on the page.

Under PRO, Art added the items he knew would cause no trouble in his blocky capitalized handwriting:

FINALLY START FAMILY

NATURAL/EASY START

SEASON ALMOST OVER

[Y/N] HAS FLEXIBLE HRS

DREAM COME TRUE??

WILL BE GR8 PARENTS

[Y/N] nodded in approval. She couldn’t think of more pros, but Art handed her the marker and she started in on the CON list:

OLYMPICS??

ART’S NEVER HOME

EXPENSIVE

SMOKING/COFFEE

CHEESE JEALOUS?

TOO YOUNG!

Art drew the line at giving up stimulants and assigning the dog human traits and struck both of those off the list with a frown.

Frankly, Art thought the cons list turned out rude.

“I haven’t qualified for the Olympics yet,” he protested. “And if I do, imagine how early on that would be. Before all the hard stuff.”

[Y/N] replied with the thing they both knew was the most real problem. She had waited forever to say it out loud. “No offense… You are never home anymore. You’re busy all the time. Which I get. It’s your job. You’re good at your job. But look how excited the fuckin’ dog got to see you because you were gone so long. You are never here. We can’t put a human in doggy day camp all the time. It would be fucking impossible to raise—“

“I’ll quit,” Art said, wincing. He wouldn’t. [Y/N] felt that this was a bluff. He tried in vain to hide his expression of shame. “I’ll quit tennis.” He said. He wasn’t going to.

“That would worsen the problem. No money.”

“I’ll work at the 7/11. I’ll be a construction worker. I could be a fuckin’ coach. I actually have a degree, y’know, I can use it. I’m more than a racket. I don’t want you to feel alone here. I want to be here for all of it, I can—“

“You know I’m alone here a lot, babe. A lot. You don’t… You’re in a position where you’re unable to help constantly. Because you’re gone. That’s okay. I married you knowing that, right? But a baby, Art? That’s not fair.”

“I’ll bail on a season. I will. I just…” Art stared at her. “Please. I’m begging you. See this kid through with me.”

The sharpie was forgotten on the counter along with dinner. Art’s knees landed on the floor before [Y/N]. Art practically lived on his knees in front of [Y/N]. He gathered [Y/N] hands in his. “Please. It’s your call, but hear me out. Because that thing is part of both us. I don’t want you to hate or resent me or the little stinker forever, but you want it. I know that. Hear me out.” His beautiful two-tone eyes stared up at her.

“Fine. Go ahead.”

“I will give you anything. Please, my world is you. Not tennis; you. I’m telling you, I-I would leave that behind to be anything you need right now. Just ask it. You’re my fucking priority, you got that? I just.. I… Please? I’m not going anywhere.”

“I want to keep it too, but—“

“Then what’s the big deal?” Art asked hopefully.

“It isn’t a good time. It’s too soon.”

Art’s mouth trailed kisses across his wife’s stomach and hips and hands and arms. He let this go on for several minutes. “Please,” Art whimpered pathetically into the skin of her wrist. “Please, please, please. I will do anything, my love. I’m on my knees here,” Art looked up at her through thick lashes. “We can do this. Both of us together. I’ll do whatever you want. You know I will. This can be good for us. I’m really sorry we’re here, but here we are, hon. What time’s going to be the right time? Please. I love you.” Art pleaded desperately.

[Y/N] knew this was going to be a disaster. But she wanted to keep it. What time’s going to be the right time? rung in her ears over and over, like the faucet. They had put so much time into arguing about the time and the place that would be right for a family. Now it was right in front of them. Her hand caressed Art’s face. She loved it when he groveled like that. This time, on his knees and everything. On instinct, he nuzzled his face into her hand and looked up at her through long lashes.

“Will you fix the faucet? It’s been dripping all week.”

“Anything.”

“I’ll… I’ll think about it. I’m going to think about it. The baby.”

“You will?” Art’s teary eyes widened.

“Objectively, this is a terrible fucking idea. We both know that. But if it’s really so terrible, why do I feel, like… happy about it…”

Art’s face lit up. It wasn’t a yes, but it wasn’t a no either. [Y/N], honestly, found it very hard to say no to Art. His arms wrapped carefully around her thighs while his head rested against her middle as he knelt. [Y/N] could feel his silver ring through the denim of her overalls. “God, I love you. I love you, [Y/N]. We’re not going to regret this. Holy shit…”

“Love you too. We’re gonna… We’re gonna try, maybe? This doesn’t feel real. Does this feel real? I…”

“It feels like a dream is what it feels like,” Art mumbled into her clothes. “I love you.” Art said, pressing a kiss to her stomach.

“I love you.”

“I’m gonna be a dad…” Art almost wept. “If you, y’know, but… Shit. I’m sorry.” Which part he was apologizing for was unclear.

At that, [Y/N] laughed and tangled her fingers in his curly blonde mop of hair. “Yeah, you’re gonna be a fucking dad, pretty baby.” She smiled.

[Y/N]’s next instinct was to say: I have to call Patrick. Then she remembered couldn’t call Patrick.

TAGLIST (ask to join):

@diorrfairy @donaldsonsdarling @muthafuckingstargirl @shysstuff @soberbabes @avylanchce

apologies for tag issues. i’ll dm those it didn’t work for!

[simpjaes]

idk if u would like this but. idol!jake fingering idol!reader while he reads out loud what people online say about her when they sexualize her / write smut abt her😂

i don't typically do idol aus but i literally haven't stopped thinking about this for like...days. wc: 706

"look how tight they think you are." Jake coos in your ear from behind, arms that were once wrapped around you in a warm hug now holding you against him just so he can keep up the pace under your shorts with his fingers. "imagine if they knew they were right."

you can't help the warmth that fans your cheeks. you'll never get used to it when he does this with you, always eager to read and see what people have to say about you online, only to end up hard and touchy after looking a bit too into it.

you know what you signed up for regarding this career path. there would be smut, there would be comments, there would be all sorts of pornographic materials made about you. that's something you came to terms with before you even made this decision, but realizing that Jake, a man within this same career path, ignores his own smut just to read yours?

you'd argue he may be one of the anonymous accounts writing it in the first place given how he reacts. sometimes he's jealous, other times he's reminded that he's the one who gets to do these things to you.

just like right now, as he recites specific passages from some raunchy fan fiction he said you had to hear about. you were gonna ask him how he found it, and why he's already read it, but you didn't really have to.

considering that warm and endearing hug from earlier absolutely included his cock already hard and probably leaking in his pants.

"pretty skin, all swollen from the bites." Jake continues to read, whispering in your ear as he starts dragging his teeth down your neck. "tight cunt, dripping and needy." he continues, scissoring his fingers open to remind you of just how well these fans must know you.

"Oh, look babe," Jake smiles, angling his fingers just right to have you rolling your eyes. "how come you say all sorts of dirty shit here, but you're too shy to do it for me?"

you can't turn to look at him with a quirked brow like you wish you could, but you're aware that he probably knows the dumbfounded look on your face.

"tell me to fuck you." He dead-pans behind your neck with a breathy whispers, moving to the other side to nibble against your ear. "Be like her, tell me how deep you wish i could be in you right now." ah, the flush is back and your cheeks are on fire. You've never been much of a talker in bed, but having to live up to the half-truths some horny fan wrote is...well.

both hot and creepy. You'd never have paid these websites a single glance if it weren't for Jake consistently reading them out to you.

you can't bring yourself to be like that for him, as you dip your head against his arm and shake your head 'no.' jake smiles at how cute you truly are, sliding his fingers out to circle your clit, reminding himself that he's got the real girl right here. "just say it once baby, please." Jake says playfully, kissing your jawline as he feels your hips move up and against the pads of his fingers, aiming your clit right where you want it. "You'd sound so pretty- just like they said you would." something inside of you cringes, but another part of you ignites at how into every version of you Jake seems to be. You take in a breathe, releasing a slight moan from the pressure below as you sigh out for him. "fuck me, jake." ah, he's so proud to be the one to hear those words. So, so fucking proud to be the one to get to do it to you. And fuck, he'd give just about anything to rub it in those chronically online loser's faces. After all, that's his girlfriend they're writing about. No matter how hot, no matter how much Jake would love for you to be just like the version of you in some of these fics, he'll be fucking damned not to love you how you really are. So pretty, so sweet, so willing to indulge him.

[arieslost]

having gossip sessions with charles while doing skincare and face masks. i’m really convinced he’s a little gossip girl at heart, like he’ll fill you in on all the drama that’s going on with the other drivers and he just looooves to listen to you yap

the way i giggled and kicked my feet with excitement when this appeared in my inbox omg.

allow me to set the scene: it’s the early hours of the morning. charles caught a late flight to wherever you are in the world after a race weekend with a promise that he had so much to tell you about everything that transpired in the days you were apart. you, of course, promised him the same, and thus waiting up for him was much less of a task than usual due to your excitement.

the moment he walks in, you waste no time in pulling him into your embrace, and he responds in kind, his luggage forgotten about by the door until the morning. he’ll follow you to the bathroom where you’ve set up a line of skincare products and face masks and immediately starts to fill you in on all the drama while you start to do his skincare for him. after race weekends like australia, you know he’s giving you every last detail. his reaction to max’s dnf, what he heard from other drivers afterwards, how ferrari celebrated their 1-2 finish. he���ll also tell you about what drivers definitely did not go out and get plastered at the club, and how they did not make absolute fools of themselves because of it. he probably has videos that he will be more than enthusiastic to share.

but as much as he loves to talk, he loves hearing you talk more. he could listen to you talk about anything for the rest of his life, honestly. he will insist that you tell him every little detail about all the gossip you gathered during your time apart as he delicately places a face mask on you, eyes filled with nothing but love and adoration even while you’re smack talking people. and don’t think he just sits there and listens— he has the most dramatic reactions, and if you need him to play a part for a reenactment of something, this man will perform.

you will never have a better gossip buddy than charles leclerc. that is a promise.

[nereidprinc3ss]

do you believe me now? | 5

in which spencer reid and fem!reader are reunited, but the worst kind of sparks are flying. you meet a man named randall. derek morgan buys you a drink (sort of). it seems that some things can't be unsaid.

part one | two | three | bonus chapter | four

this series is 18+ warnings/tags: r goes to a bar but doesn't drink alcohol, gets hit on by weird men, dramatic, angst, sorry in advance a/n: surprise! i'll see myself out. love you! lmk your thoughts on this bad boy! i KNOW you'll have some! i'm locking all my doors and the cops are on speed dial after posting this. stay tuned for part six tho

You don’t call Spencer for four days. 

Spencer doesn’t call you for four days. 

It’s scary. 

There’s some texting—mostly him giving you updates on how things are going and when he expects to be back. Mostly you giving the messages a thumbs up and saying nothing else. 

Finally, on Thursday afternoon, his ringtone (the Bill Nye theme) makes you jump as you’re sitting on your bed staring into space. 

His caller ID photo—which is simply his passport photo, because you’d thought it was adorable—stares at you. You stare back. Contemplate not picking up. 

But you’re not quite there yet. 

And you cannot keep listening to Bill Nye the Science Guy. 

The answer button is cold under your thumb, but not as cold as your greeting. 

“Hi.”

You barely recognize your own voice. 

It seems to send Spencer for a loop as well, because his reply is halting. 

“Hey! Hi, um—how are you? I feel like we’ve barely talked this week.”

That would be because you told me my feelings for you are stronger than your feelings for me and I don’t know how to stop making every single word I say secretly mean I love you. We can’t have a conversation without me loving you. It will always be in the room or on the phone with us. To ignore the presence of it is impossible, and I don’t know if I can ignore the absence of yours, either. 

“Uh… yeah. I’m fine. What’s up?”

There’s a pause. 

“We wrapped up this morning. We’re getting on the jet here in a few minutes, and, um—I know it’s not ideal, but we missed Derek’s birthday and Penelope is insisting we all go to his favorite bar tonight. And he told me that for his birthday he wants to meet you. So… would you be up for that?”

“You want… to take me to a bar?”

“No. I mean—I know it’s not really your thing, but we missed Derek’s birthday three years in a row, and—and I understand if you don’t want to meet him tonight, but we wouldn’t have to stay very long and I really, really shouldn’t skip it. Derek has saved my life on more than one occasion.”

“You could go without me.”

More silence. Every second hurts, but you don’t understand why he wants you to come meet his best friend if he thinks the two of you are in different places emotionally. 

But maybe he’s not going to break up with you just yet. Maybe he’s going to keep inviting you to bars and foreign film festivals and bookshops. Maybe he’s going to treat you exactly the same as he always has but with this new added layer of knowledge that the way he treats you isn’t actually love, and it never was, and you’re not sure if it has the potential to ever become love. Because if it did—wouldn’t it have already? What more do you have to offer than what you’ve already given him?

Breakup or no breakup, you feel sick. 

When he speaks his tone is similarly chilly. It’s welcome. You want him mad. If he can’t reciprocate your adoration, then the very least he can do is have the decency to reciprocate your reproach. 

“I could. Is that what you want?”

No. I don’t want any of this. I need you to know me well enough to know that. And if you can’t love me then at least get angry. At least show me you feel something other than passive contentment. 

“Yeah. Sure. I don’t know.”

A pause stretches so long your heart pounds. You watch the elapsed time of the call tick by, second by second, and you wait for the anticipation to crack under the weight of silence, to give way to some terrible jump scare or to give way at all. 

But the words that end the conversation (if you can even call it that) aren’t any great relief. They’re just sad, and chalk full of defeat. 

“Alright. I’ll… I’ll call you later.”

You feel like you’ve swallowed an ice cube. All the words you’d like to say are frozen in your stinging throat. 

“Okay. Um… I’ll let you board now.”

“The jet’s not…” but he trails off. When he speaks again he sounds just as hurt as you’d wanted—and it doesn’t make you feel better at all. “Okay. Bye.”

“Bye.”

The line goes dead, and your face is burning as tears fill your eyes for the hundredth time this week. That call was terrible and poisonous and you don’t feel like yourself. 

Things have gone so wrong so quickly, and all you know how to do is ice him out so he can’t do it to you first. But it’s not going to make this better. No matter how mean you are to him, at the root of it all you feel unloved and scared and alone and Spencer knows things about love and relationships that you don’t. He’s confusing you with all this talk of feeling differently about each other and I’ll be home tomorrow I miss you and things get complicated when one person likes the other more and let’s talk in person and will you come meet my best friend tonight. All of it leaves you motion sick and ugly crying in the fetal position. 

All you have to get through this is who you’ve always been, a little of the person you’ve become, and the love you harbor for Spencer which rattles around in your chest like a nail in an empty toolbox. At the moment it hardly seems helpful. It mocks you, pointing out the pathetic hilarity of your paradox. The only person who can comfort you, the person you want more than anything, is the reason you’re so upset in the first place. But you can’t help being drawn to him. 

Maybe the love you have for Spencer is more like a magnet in a compass. 

Even if he doesn’t feel it for you, you do love Spencer. And that goes beyond just loving the parts of him that like you. To hide from that love would be a gross disservice to yourself and all the work you’ve done to get here. It’s not as if you suddenly know exactly what the answer is—but you’re sure that hiding is the most childish, cowardly thing you could do and the furthest you could get from a resolution. Even if you can’t make him love you back, you refuse to allow yourself to fizzle quietly out of his life. This relationship deserves something more than that. 

So maybe you don’t have a plan when you wipe your eyes and pick up your phone. Maybe there’s no strategy behind your actions as you text Garcia for the bar location. But if you keep running from everything you’ll never get anywhere. All you can do is show up. It seems like the next best step. 

------

The pub isn’t too crowded—but for a Thursday night, you suppose it’s a bit busy. 

Boot heels hooked onto the metal foot-beam of the stool you’re sitting on, elbows resting on the polished mahogany surface of the bar, you’re staring into an untouched mixed drink. Then you glance down the bar to your right, at the man who’d bought it for you. 

Maybe your ensemble gave him the wrong idea. 

Coming to this gathering had required bravery, and you came armored. Your ensemble projects significantly more confidence than you’re currently feeling. It was intentional, a form of self-protection—but now you’re wondering if it’s projecting a little too much confidence. 

All done up, clearly still a little rough around the edges, and sitting alone at a bar was bound to draw the wrong pairs of eyes. 

“Hey, darlin’,” the gruff man says, approaching when you inadvertently catch his gaze. “Are you gonna drink that, or should I? Otherwise I’m lookin’ at eleven dollars right down the drain.”

You avert your eyes, scanning the groups dotted here and there. 

“I’m waiting for friends.”

“Does that make a free drink less appealing?”

He takes the stool next to you, off-gassing the scent of cigarettes and leather. 

“I’m not drinking.”

“Really? I’ve never seen a girl who looks as sad as you do come sit at the bar to stay sober.”

You frown, looking back up at the man next to you. He seems like the Hell’s Angels type—tattooed knuckles, leather jacket, grey beard, and a weathered face that’s clearly spent decades with the sun. Fifties, maybe younger and just looks more rugged. What does it say about how I look tonight that this is the kind of man I’m attracting, you wonder. Maybe you look desperate and just as lonely as you feel. As he claims you do. 

“I’m not sad.”

“Alright. I’ll take your word for it. But a happier girl wouldn’t be all alone.”

“I’m waiting for friends,” you repeat, letting the words drip like venom from your tongue. 

“I’m Randall. See? Now we're friends.”

“I don’t need more friends. I like the ones I have.”

Something catches Randall’s attention long enough to catch yours. He raises his bottle vaguely, gesturing beyond your shoulder. 

“Are those angry lookin’ guys in the suits marching right over here the friends you’re talking about?”

You turn your head, brows furrowed, and immediately see the gentlemen to whom your new pal is pointing out. 

Spencer is storming across the bar looking close to furious (which for him, means an expression so placid it gives you chills) followed by Derek Morgan—a man who you’ve only seen pictures of and is even more impressive in person. 

You hate how your breath catches, how your heart is already beating a little faster than usual at the sight of him even though you’re not exactly pleased with each other right now. 

Suddenly the bubbles in your cocktail are once again fascinating.

“Those are the ones.”

“And why are they dressed for church?”

Church?

“They’re FBI.”

“Ah. My lucky fuckin’ day.”

You almost snort. 

“Hey,” Spencer says sternly, hand settling on your back as he partially fills the small space between you and the strange man. “Who’s this?”

You shrug, sit up a little straighter, and take a shallow breath—not because you’re scared of this man but because Spencer is suddenly so close to you and you can feel his warmth and the air bending around him and the scent of him is genuinely dizzying to you. 

“Randall,” you exhale unenthusiastically. But the odd thing is that you’re rather grateful for Randall’s presence. Because now Spencer is here and you have no idea what you’re going to say to him. 

“Oh,” Randall says, sipping his beer unhurriedly before using it to gesture to Spencer. “You’re the boyfriend. You know, that’s funny, because she didn’t mention a boyfriend.”

“I didn’t mention anything. We weren’t having a real conversation.”

Randy holds his hands up defensively, fingers still wrapped around the neck of a sweating bottle. 

“I’m just saying it’s in-ter-esting. Not trying to start anything.” He stands, pauses for another sip—Spencer obviously isn’t sure what to make of this man because he says nothing. “But listen, man to man—you better buy her some flowers or a real pretty fuckin’ necklace or somethin’ because a happy girl in a happy relationship does not come pout at the bar all by herself.”

“Get out of here, man,” Derek finally speaks up. 

“Yeah, yeah.” He sets his empty bottle down and fishes in his pocket for a cigarette, sticking it between his lips. “But—just for the record—I have a wife. I wasn’t gonna do anything weird. Sometimes when you’re my age you just gotta live a little. Buy a pretty girl a drink. Piss off some Mormons, or whatever the fuck you are.”

This guy sounds like a bad Bruce Springsteen song. But part of you would almost rather hang out with Randall than be forced into a conversation you’re not prepared for with Spencer. 

And whose fault is that, you remind yourself. You decided to come be mature. Suck it up. 

“Goodnight,” Derek emphasizes. 

Spencer doesn’t say a word. You can feel his eyes boring smoking holes into the side of your face, and you look anywhere else.  

“I’ll be here next week after physical therapy like clockwork,” the stranger waves as he ambles away—but not before pointing at you. “You enjoy that drink, friend. And don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

What a weird man. 

There’s silence for a moment—in which Spencer refuses to stop watching you and you refuse to acknowledge that. 

“And here I was thinking Spencer made you up.” Derek has a beautiful smile and a warm, charming cadence as he holds out his hand for you to shake. “I’m Derek.”

You take the proffered hand and shake, offering him a shy smile and introducing yourself in kind. 

“Happy birthday, by the way. Sorry for crashing your party.”

Really, he’s stunning. 

“Thank you, sweetheart. And you’re not crashing anything. I told pretty boy here I wanted to meet you the second he started talking about a friend. But nah, he just wanted to talk and talk and talk about you—” 

“Alright,” Spencer mumbles, blushing, eyes finally torn from your profile. You smile slightly, brows knitting as Derek magically melts some of the terrible tension.

“Pretty boy?”

Before either of them can explain, someone shrieks in your general direction. You startle backward in your seat, and Spencer steps closer, hand sliding up your back as Penelope, JJ, and Emily join your little huddle. For only a second you allow yourself to shrink into him—before you’re straightening your posture like your spine is a metal rod and his touch burns. It’s a knee-jerk defensive reaction for which you have no explanation. You can’t see him, but you don’t feel his hand on you again. 

“Oh my god! Look at this beautiful person who I love!” Penelope exclaims, pushing past Derek to grab your face and kiss both of your cheeks. “Oh my god,” she says again, wiping sticky lipgloss away with her thumbs, “I totally meant to ask before I did that. But your face is just so kissable. I’m so glad you decided to come!”

“Hi, Penelope,” you smile half-heartedly, incapable of reciprocating her cheery mood. Fortunately, she’s cheery enough for a standard commercial flight’s worth of people, and probably thinks of Derek’s birthday as a national holiday—so she doesn’t pick up on this. 

Emily and JJ offer you tamer although perfectly kind greetings. 

“Ooh, what are you drinking?” Emily asks, leaning closer to examine the forgotten beverage in front of you. 

“Not that,” Spencer mutters, grabbing the glass and sliding it away from you. You give him an affronted look—and immediately wish you hadn’t, since you’re meeting his eyes for the first time since he left. His words stall for just a moment as his eyes dart between yours before he’s saying, “you shouldn’t accept a drink if you didn’t watch someone make it.”

The audacity of him to be acting protective makes you scoff. 

“That guy didn’t spike my drink. He was harmless.”

“People thought Ted Bundy was harmless, too.”

It’s such a ridiculous thing to say that you don’t even have a response—your eyes simply narrow and you shake your head. A claustrophobic silence falls over the small group. 

“Okay…” JJ murmurs. “Um, do you guys want to go check out the jukebox with me? We have to play all of the birthday boy’s favorites.”

Several enthusiastic yeses go around, but you’re too busy having a stand off with your boyfriend to take much notice. 

Soon, it’s just the two of you. 

“Controlling isn’t a good look for you,” you finally say, spinning to rest your elbows on the bar once more and studying the bottles of liquor on the shelves beyond. 

“Evasive and avoidant isn’t particularly flattering, either. I was under the impression that you had no intention of coming after that phone call earlier.” 

You scoff again as your blood heats. Already the conversation is going worse than you’d expected—and your expectations were not high. 

“Do you think the cab driver was a serial killer, too? Or maybe the bartender?”

He’s still behind you and slightly to the side—but he leans down, resting his own fists on the bar right next to you and speaking lowly, directly over your shoulder. 

“Why don’t you try speaking to me like we’re adults instead of starting meaningless arguments in order to get under my skin?”

From him, that hurts. 

It’s a branch on the tree of your greatest insecurity—the fear that you’re too inexperienced with relationships and that makes you too immature and he’s been lying every time he says it’s not an issue. Because of course it’s an issue. It’s why you fell in love with him, it’s why you don’t know how to fix it, and it’s why you’re incapable of actually expressing any of your feelings to him.

“Why do you think I’m here right now?” you whisper—as sharp and stinging as a poison dart. “I’m trying to be a fucking adult. I don’t want to be here.”

Silence. 

“Then why did you come?”

His voice is so calm it burns like dry ice. 

“Because! Because you asked me to, because—”

You can’t bring yourself to say it aloud. 

Because I’m obviously still in love with you and I can’t just turn that off. I tried to do the right thing. 

Instead you bury your face in your hands and let it hang in the air, unspoken. You know he knows. You just don’t know why he’s acting like you’re so unreasonable for being upset. 

“Let me make this very clear to you,” Spencer murmurs, brushing your hair away from your ear so tenderly, speaking so softly you could convince yourself that he’ll say something kind. It’s the closest he’s been in days and now that he’s here you feel how much you missed him in your bones. And even though you sense a trap, you can’t help but sit up straighter. You’ll be complicit in your own undoing if it means you can have him close. His breath shakes slightly as he inhales and you brace as best you can. “Nobody is forcing you to be here. You told me you weren’t coming and then you decided to show up. I was ready to give you the space that you were too scared to ask me for. But I can only take responsibility for so much of what is ultimately your bad behavior and your adolescent volatility. You can only blame so much of your bad behavior on inexperience before I run out of patience because I don’t find thoughtlessness and emotional immaturity compelling. I told you that if there is a disparity in the way we feel for each other, that was fine, and I meant it. But if you can’t cope with how I feel about you then don’t let me hold you back. I am not holding you hostage. You can leave whenever you want. So don’t waste your time punishing me because you don’t want to be here. And if you do want to be here, good. I want that too. But act like an adult and make a decision. My leniency has limits, even for you. I am asking that you do not push it any further than you already have.”

You don’t know how long it’s been since your last breath by the time he finishes his address.

Long enough that you’re dizzy when you push away from the bar and shoulder through the throng of patrons as quickly as you reasonably can without outright running. 

Long enough that when you burst out the door into the biting-cold night air, and finally take a deep, gasping breath, it burns and stings and aches and so does your head and your eyes as they well with hot, furious, heartbroken tears. 

You speed-walk to the end of the block, hand clamped over your mouth to muffle your cries and all the curse words you’d love to scream. 

Part of you knows you walked away from the bar in case he decided to try and follow you—but when you look over your shoulder the sidewalk is empty. You should’ve known better than to think he’d follow you after that. But at least it means you can have your breakdown by the relative safety of the bar, leaning your back against the dirty brick facade next to the entrance alcove and sliding down until your butt hits the cold concrete and you don’t even care. 

Who the fuck was that man in the bar who looked like Spencer and sounded like Spencer but spoke to you like this is all your fault, like it’s your fault you love him and he doesn’t love you back, like it’s ridiculous that you’d be upset, like you’re cruel and petty for having feelings about it, about him—for having any fucking feelings at all? And to think that was the man who you let know you more intimately than anyone ever has. Every insecurity you’d ever admitted to him was hurled back in your face like it was nothing. Hell—he even handed you the ones you’d never mentioned. He proved every terrible thought you’ve been having about yourself right. 

How could he be so unabashedly mean to you?

Spencer doesn’t have to love you. It seems clearer now than ever that he doesn’t. But part of you wonders if he suffered some sort of traumatic brain injury because that’s the only explanation for why he could go from treating you how he did before to treating you like he doesn’t even like you. 

You feel like you might throw up. 

“Called it,” a rasping, grumbling voice says from a few feet away. 

You look up, and spot fucking Randall standing under a street light ten feet away, still smoking. 

You go back to studying the tar spots on the sidewalk through bleary eyes. Pebbles sting as they press into your palms. Another one of the universe’s terrible jokes, you suppose. Just earlier you’d thought that you’d rather talk to Randall than Spencer and now here you are and here he is. 

“That kid as much of a dipshit punk as I thought he was?”

Hearing Spencer described as a kid and a dipshit punk is so jarring you almost stop crying. 

“He’s not a dipshit,” you sniff, voice thick with tears as you find yourself explaining Spencer Reid to this stranger for no reason at all. “He has an IQ of 187. He’s a genius.”

“Ah,” he scoffs dismissively, flicking ash from his cigarette. “Dipshit-ism don’t discriminate. Anyone can be one. Even your genius punk boyfriend. As a recovering dipshit myself I know what the work of a fellow dipshit looks like. And this has dipshit written all over it.”

You sob harder. 

Randall speaks calmly around his cigarette. 

“You know, I’m sorry for whatever you got goin’ on. But I’ve never not been the asshole when I got a hysterical woman in front of me. It’s nice that I can confidently say this time it is not my fault.”

The bar door opens, letting a warm burst of jovial music and chatter into the otherwise still night. Steps that are too heavy to be Spencer’s hit the concrete next to you—you look to your left and see Derek Morgan before he looks down and sees you. 

“Hey—you okay out here?”

“Why don’t you go ask your Jehovah’s Witness buddy? He did this.”

Derek makes a face, locating the source of this interjection. 

“Sir, I asked you to leave her alone once and I don’t appreciate being made to repeat myself. Are we clear?”

“Yeah, whatever. Fuck me for making friendly conversation, I guess. Gonna have to call my wife and tell her to pick me up down the street. I don’t want her on the damn phone while she’s driving.”

Randall wanders away again, still muttering to himself and smoking. Derek watches him go, staring daggers into his back until he turns his gaze to you. 

Goodbye, Randall, you think. Great. Now I have neither of them. 

“Hey,” he softens, crouching down to your level. “You okay?”

You sniff, wiping your cheeks and attempting not to smudge your makeup. It’s impossible not to feel awkward—you just met this guy and now he’s here trying to do emotional labor for you on his birthday. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. This is embarrassing.”

“You don’t look fine. Can I do anything for you? Do you want some food? A drink?”

“You really don’t have to—”

“I know, I know. But look—Reid is always talking about you. You’re important to him, and he’s important to me. I’ve never seen him this happy and I’ve known that kid a long time. It is in my best interest that someone maintain you, and if it’s not him, it’ll be me. Call it a favor to him, if that makes you feel better.” Derek is sporting a slightly more modest Cheshire grin again by the end of his sentence. Listening to him speak that way about Spencer speaking about you, it’s impossible not to feel a teeny bit lighter. Even if you’re not entirely sure where you stand on all things Spencer related at the moment. “So I’ll ask you again. Is there anything I can do for you?”

You sniff again. 

“Sure. A ginger ale or something might be good.”

“Got it. I’ll be back. And come inside if Randall tries to run up on you again, okay?”

Despite yourself you manage a laugh at the way he says the name. His warm smile flickers warmer at this.  

“Will do.”

When Derek returns a few minutes later, the plastic cup he’s holding looks decidedly not like ginger ale. 

“Penelope insisted that this is what you would want. I don’t even know.”

You smile slightly as you take the cup, full to the brim with bubbles and thick red syrup. A cherry bobs underneath the layer of cubed ice. 

“Shirley temple,” you chuckle. “I’ll take it. Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome,” he says, flashing that brilliant smile again, and you look into your cup as you drink. Maybe your face warms just a bit. You’re still shy around men, you realize. Especially attractive ones. And Derek Morgan definitely qualifies as attractive. 

“So,” he begins, and to your surprise, crouches down in front of you. “I have to be honest—I came out here in the first place because Reid sent me to check on you. But now I’m wondering what the hell he did.”

Spencer sent him. A considerate action that would theoretically signal his care for your feelings. You take another sip, staring into space and trying to digest this information, but it only jumbles with the rest to confuse you more. 

Of course, you don’t know how to convey this to Derek in a way that’s not overly-familiar for just having met the man, so you go with an old standby. 

“I’m probably just overreacting.”

“Uh-huh. I have sisters. I know what an overreaction looks like and if you were overreacting you wouldn’t be out here hiding. What’d he do?”

You can only keep up the facade of emotional stability for so long. Your chin wobbles in a horribly embarrassing way and you look down again. 

“I’m not sure—I’m not sure if he really did anything or if I’m just being dramatic and I don’t want to make him seem—”

“Why don’t you stop defending him and just tell me what he did?” Derek urges. “Trust me—I love that kid to death. But I also know he can be a dick sometimes. You don’t need to worry about making him look bad in front of me.”

Part of you is glad Spencer has such a good friend on his side. And Derek is right—Spencer is an adult. You don’t need to worry about besmirching his reputation. So you take a shuddering sigh, staring into the red of your drink. 

“He just doesn’t like me as much as I like him. Which isn’t his fault, like I said, but—he’s being such an asshole about it.”

Derek pulls a face, strong eyebrows making an impression as they knit.  

“Did he tell you that?”

“Over the phone,” you nod emphatically. “And just now he gave me this whole fucking speech about how immature and horrible I am for not being 100% happy about it. And maybe he’s partially right, I mean—I know people feel things differently and maybe he just was asking for more time. I worry I fucked it up so bad because I couldn’t handle that—but at the same time he didn’t say he wanted more time. He was really fucking unclear and vague about what he wanted, and he asked me to come to this bar like it was nothing when I’ve been worried he was going to break up with me all week. So yeah, I guess he’s right and I have been a bitch about it because I was upset that he didn’t… like me as much. And I wanted him to feel bad because I was so embarrassed, and I also didn’t want to act like everything was normal if he was just going to dump me, I…” you realize you’ve been hardcore rambling and your face heats. “I don’t know.”

There’s a pause, and you worry you’ve done exactly the thing you didn’t want to, which was overshare to this man who seems like he’s significantly more normal and well-adjusted than you. You drink deeply, swallowing sugar and the rest of your words. 

“That’s… bizarre. I don’t mean to invalidate your feelings, but… that just doesn’t make any sense.”

“Yeah,” you scoff, projecting annoyance so you won’t start crying again. “I was confused too. I thought he really liked me.”

“No, sweetheart, I’m saying—that doesn’t make sense because he does really like you. Really, really likes you, more than I’ve ever seen him like someone before. I mean, last week I finally finished that Tesla biography he’s been on my ass about for months and when I told him, all he wanted to do was talk about your thoughts on it. And then it wasn’t even about the book anymore. I have never, ever seen Reid pass up an opportunity to talk about Nikola Tesla. I’m talking never in my life. He finds a way to make every conversation about you. I can’t even follow the connections sometimes but he always finds a way.”

Your nose wrinkles. 

“Sorry you’ve had to hear so much about me,” you mumble. Though you’re not really sorry. It feels good. A twinge of joy in all the murk. 

“I’m not. Like I said, I’ve known Spencer for a long time and I’ve never seen him this happy. I’m not about to let him fuck it up.”

“If I make him so happy then why did he tell me we don’t feel the same?” you whisper, reaching into the puddle of syrup and ice at the bottom of your now empty cup. 

“Is that exactly what he said?” Derek asks, after a long pause. You bite the maraschino cherry off the stem and nod morosely, grinding a long-gone stranger’s cigarette butt with your boot just to crush something. There’s another beat of silence. “Alright. You know what I think?”

You raise your head to meet his gaze, your own wide-eyed and expectant. 

“I think you two need to have an honest conversation. You’re both confused and hurting—I promise Spencer is feeling it too. If you talk to him he won’t be unkind to you.”

“He already was,” you admit. 

“I apologize if I’m out of line here, but you just told me you’ve been icing him out all week because you want him to feel bad. I’m willing to bet you don’t realize how sharp these claws are.” Derek grabs your hand as he says it and you marvel at how much he is the opposite of you. Everything he does and says seems so natural and reasonable and charming even if it would piss you off from anyone else—and you just met the guy. You can see why Spencer and Penelope speak so highly of him. “I think you’ve probably both had your moments these past few days. But that doesn’t mean neither of you deserve any more chances.”

He puts your hand back on your knee and pats it. 

“Besides, Spencer‘s not good at mean. I bet he’s inside worrying himself sick over whatever dumb shit he said to you. He’s probably hyperventilating as we speak.”

“It was really out of character for him,” you concede. 

“Yeah. He’ll be apologizing for a long while. It will get annoying. But he sure as hell won’t be doing it again, I can tell you that much. If he does, let me know. Emily and I will whoop his ass and call it a fitness evaluation.”

“I think that’ll be unnecessary,” you laugh thickly, pulling your sleeve over your hand and wiping away the few tears that haven’t quite dried. “But thank you.”

“Anytime. Now, it’s my birthday, and as a grown man I should not be getting involved in someone else’s relationship drama. I was supposed to be on the dance floor a while ago.” His tone is so warm and sugary by the time he finishes it could rot his perfect grin. It’s futile to hide the way your mouth twists into a reluctant smile as you look down and fix your hair—praying he can’t tell how fazed you are by his kindness. “You’re going to talk to him, right?”

“I’ll—yeah. Right,” you say quietly. But the sinking feeling in your stomach knows it’s a thing easier said than done. 

“Good,” Derek grunts, taking your empty cup before pushing himself back up to his feet and offering you a hand. “Do you want me to send him out here or do you want to come find him inside?”

You balk.

“Like—right now? I have to talk to him now?”

Before he can give you an answer you think you’d rather not have, the bar door is opening. From your spot you can’t see who it is right away, but Derek turns over his shoulder and does a double take before looking back at you. 

Spencer steps out onto the sidewalk, eyes scanning for until he realizes you’re a few feet shorter than usual. Sitting on a filthy public walkway is probably his worst nightmare, you realize, as you scramble to your feet and dust the crumbs of concrete from your palms against the back of your cold jeans. He begins to say your name, and it sounds like relief and regret, but you stop him. 

“I have to go wash my hands.”

It’s monotonous and mumbled and comes out too quickly but you don’t have time to worry about that as you brush past both of the men on your way back into the bar, making an immediate beeline for the bathroom. 

Your face burns with anxiety as you shut the door behind you, immediately drowning in the yellowish lighting which is so harsh but seems to illuminate almost nothing. Who paints a bathroom red? It’s suffocating. You feel like you’re inside an aorta. 

Water runs cool over your hands as you sniffle, rinsing the bits of dirt from red indents made by pebbles and things, and the soap is too floral and powdery but you wash twice anyway. Maybe you’ll just stay in here and wash your hands forever. 

There’s a light knock on the shiny wooden door and it makes you jump. Your name is muffled from the other side. 

“You in there?” 

Quickly you wipe under your reddened eyes in the mirror, trying to fix the slightly smudged makeup. 

The door opens when you don’t respond, and there’s Spencer, looking weary and tense all at once. Is that your fault?

“Hey,” you sniff, trying to effect casualness, but it comes out too quickly and your posture is too stiff. Under his all-seeing gaze you cross and uncross your arms, look at him and look away. Your hands end up in your pockets. He’d say crossed arms are a sign of self-soothing. 

“Hey.” His is more measured, and of course makes you feel embarrassed in comparison. The door swings shut behind him as he enters the small room and makes it feel that much smaller. “Are you… hiding from me in here?”

Yes. 

The graffitied toilet stalls to your left suddenly look fascinating. 

“Nope. Just washing my hands.”

This is not what Derek told you to do, you scold yourself internally. Stop being so scared. Be honest with him. 

Silence rings. All the brutally honest things you’d like to say choke you until your throat hurts and your eyes get hot. Yet again you feel like a stupid little girl who’s too emotional to communicate. 

You cross your arms. It’s an indulgence you feel you’re owed. 

Spencer says your name again and it’s too much. He never says it this often. When he does it feels good but now it’s too formal, makes you too aware of your own inadequacy, and how he must be seeing you—a wraith of a girl in a dingy bar bathroom with clammy hands and smudged eyeliner, practically shaking with fear under an unforgiving light. Someone who is too scared and much too sensitive. 

Spencer attempts to speak again. 

“What I said before, it was—”

“Can you just take me home?” 

It comes out on one exhalation and seems to stall him with all the effectiveness of a slap to the face. 

You don’t know where it comes from, either. 

Easier said than done, you’d thought a few moments ago. All the bravery Derek had tried to instill in you is gone, swallowed down the drain like soap scum. And now you’re choosing to let your fear win—because at least that’s a known quantity. The fear will never reject you. It will always be waiting with open arms. 

Too scared. 

The end feels imminent. You try to press yourself back together, fingernails biting into palms, trying to make something feel more tangible than the terrible knowingness that you’re careening toward an end which was supposed to be a beginning. It’s stifling and you wonder if Spencer is breathing it too. 

You can’t look at his face, but you watch him pocket his hands in his pants and there is so much impossible space between you in such a tiny room. 

“Yeah. I can.”

Something breaks. It’s small, and without fanfare. But it feels final. 

It’s just a ride home. Just a ride home. 

That’s all you have left, and you don’t know how you know it but you do. 

Something so important is being left in this stupid, dingy bathroom. Something that was at one point beautiful and shiny and so arrogant in its newness that it seemed it would never become ugly. And now you’re abandoning it without dignity on the chipped tile floor and in the cobwebs on the walls. It was bigger than you, it was you—and now it’s going to be nothing. 

A vehicle honks on the street. A boisterous group laugh explodes somewhere beyond the door. Water drips from a faucet. 

“I’ll… I’ll bring my car around.”

“Okay.”

But he just stands there for another moment. Like he can’t get himself to move. 

If only time would freeze before he could walk away. 

But it doesn’t. 

He sucks in a decisive breath. 

“Okay,” he murmurs. 

It’s that fucking phone call all over again. 

Then he spins on his heels and leaves you there.

Your time is up. 

[moonstruckme]

have a bonfire - send a character + a trope (one bed, fake dating, etc.) and I’ll write a drabble

AHHHHH CONGRATS CONGRATS CONGRATS

how about like secret royalty, like very princess diaries-esque, with sirius???? he's basically royalty anyway, so either him or reader suddenly entering his world would be so cute

Thanks lovely <3

prince!Sirius x princess!reader ♡ 1.2k words

With the early arrival of the visiting king, the uproar the palace (You’re actually not sure what you’re supposed to call this place. Castle? Mansion? Home? (You really hope you’re not supposed to call it home, that seems awfully quick.)) has been in since your arrival triples in severity. Your grandmother completely disappears, the nice older man who’s been showing you around goes with her, and when no one wants to take on the problem of the new and completely untrained princess, you’re shooed into the nearest sitting room to wait things out. 

“Well, this has to have been a mistake.”

You give a start, turning in place to find a young man stretched out like a cat on a settee by the window. He has longish, dark hair that spills like ink over the green upholstery and cunning eyes that are narrowed curiously on you despite his disinterested countenance.

“Or I suppose maybe your team’s just stashed you here the same way my father’s stashed me,” he says, and the voice that emerges from that small, pretty mouth is just as smooth he looks like it would be, self-assured and infused with an accent that speaks to a privileged upbringing. “I don’t imagine they’d like knowing their new pet is cavorting with her equals so early on.” An untrustworthy smile curves his lips. “Could be fun. Should we ring for food?” 

You have half a dozen questions, but what makes it out is, “Pet?” 

The boy tilts his head, giving you a knowing look. “You’re an unhousebroken puppy, sweetheart.” His eyes dip to the dress they’d put you in this morning, skimming their way back up to your face and leaving goosebumps in their wake. “A very pretty one, but as far as royals are concerned, an embarrassment. From what I hear, that’s hardly your fault, though.” 

You sit a cautious distance away from him, on a parallel couch. The afternoon sunlight spills over the top of his settee and hits your eyes, but you bear it rather than move. 

A week ago, a couple of days even, you wouldn’t have been able to make eye contact with someone like this. But though this boy is prettier and speaks more brashly than nearly anyone you’ve come across, you’ve grown remarkably used to novelty since being sat down in front of relatives you didn’t know to be told that you were heir to a country you’d never heard of. One upside to the chaos of the last few days is, you suppose, it might be making you braver. 

“Who are you?” you ask. 

“Oh, my god.” He smiles, seemingly delighted. “You really are brand new, aren’t you? I’m not trying to sound arrogant,” he says at your flustered look, “it’s just we’re usually trained to know important people before we ever meet them. It’s not every day I come upon someone who actually has no idea who I am.” 

A little laugh trips off your tongue. You tell him, “You’re not making your not-arrogant point very well.”

“Well, I never said I wasn’t arrogant.” That dastardly grin again, slicing across his face like a weapon. “I said I didn’t want to sound arrogant. I’ve been told it doesn’t make a very polite first impression.” He stands, graceful limbs unfurling, and starts for the door. “I’m Sirius. Are you hungry?” 

You nod dazedly as he crosses the room, and it’s only then that you realize he’s wearing a suit. Or, parts of one. The jacket and tie have been cast off, hung over the arm of the settee, but he’s still wearing the pants (thank god) and a dress shirt that appears blue in the light but otherwise is so dark it might be black. 

Sirius opens the door, murmuring to someone outside. When he’s done, he heads for you instead of the settee. Kicks his shoes off and settles in across from you, legs crossed underneath him like you’re at a sleepover. You decide to follow suit, turning to face him and trusting the length of your dress to protect you from scandal as you tent your knees in front of you. 

“That’s better,” Sirius says, and his eyes look different with the light cutting across them. Before, they’d been in shadow, but now they’re the color of heavy clouds, a faint bluish hue brought out by his dress shirt. “You looked stunning with the light on your face, but you’re even lovelier when you’re not squinting. I asked for someone to bring us chicken nuggets, is that alright? You’re not vegetarian, are you?” 

You’re surprised at the choice, but that quickly gives way to relief. You feel a smile tugging at your lips at the banal normalcy of it. After the five-course dinner you’d had the night before that had tormented your unrefined stomach for hours afterwards, chicken nuggets sound like a dream. 

“That’s good,” you reply, and Sirius returns your smile with feeling. “Who were you talking to out there?” 

“A member of my detail is just outside the door,” he explains airily, as if security details are something everyone has and talks about on a routine basis. Your astonishment must show on your face, because he raises a slender eyebrow. “You don’t have one? I suppose not every kingdom does. Or, if you haven’t left the palace, you might not have met yours yet.” 

“You said your name was Sirius.” 

“I did.” 

“But you didn’t say your last name.” 

Sirius’ lips twist wryly. “I did not.” 

Maybe it’s his own audacious manner, but you feel like you can be straightforward with him. “Why not?” 

He shrugs and lists sideways, leaning his shoulder against the back of the couch. “Maybe I’m still enjoying the novelty of you. I don’t often get to talk to people without all the genteel manners and button-up-ed-ness.” 

You tilt your head. “You’re one of the Black family, aren’t you?” 

Sirius nods, looking unsurprised you’ve figured it out. It’s obvious he’s royal, so it really wasn’t that far a leap. He doesn’t look like any of the family you’ve met so far, and the only other royals are the ones visiting.

“So does that make you the king’s son?” 

“There are two of us, actually.” He mirrors you, tilting his head so it’s resting against the couch. “But I’m the oldest, so I get to go on all the fun trips.” 

You feel your lips twist again. “Yeah, you seem like you’re having a blast.” 

“Oh, let there be no misunderstanding, doll.” He straightens, looking you in the eye. It feels like being under a spotlight, and it’s all you can do not to look away. Sirius grins. “This is my fun face. I’m having a far better time with you than I have at any of these things in years.” 

“Oh.” You can’t help it now, and your gaze flees down to the skirt of your dress. You take a bit of the fabric between your fingers, distracting yourself with the extraordinary silkiness of it. “Well, happy to help. Maybe while your family is here our paths will cross again.” 

You look up, and his expression has softened into something nearing genuine. “I’ll be sure that they do,” he says.

[thoughtidtry]

Mr. Perfectly Fine - MV CL

SUMMARY: Angst: After your break up you take time to reflect on the man you once thought hung the stars. Who knew another would help you find the beauty in the stars as they fell. PAIRING: Ex!Max Verstappen X fem!reader, Charles Leclerc x reader at the end. A/N: Inspired by Mr. Perfectly Fine by Taylor Swift. Experimenting with formatting so please let me know if it helps with reading! 2.8k+ words... I apparently can't write anything smaller let me know if you all would rather have it in thousand-word parts instead of one long post!

"Mr. "Perfect Face" Mr. "Here to stay""

"You're so beautiful liefje"

Max hummed in the crook of your neck as you lay back on his chest while watching a movie. These moments were your favorite, the quiet murmurs, and gentle touches while enjoying each other company. The times when you had him all to yourself with no cameras or teammates looking at you both.

"Look who's talking pretty boy"

You responded back with a playful smirk knowing he hated being called pretty.

"Only pretty liefde really. I'm offended"

All you could do was giggle before looking back at your boyfriend to find him clutching his chest like you would imagine an old lady clutching her pearls.

"Oh I'm so sorry, I didn't know being pretty was a bad thing now"

Faking an innocent look as you apologized for your disrespectful comment. You wanted to see how far you could tease before he reacted. Already he looked like he was mulling over whether or not to accept you heartfelt apology.

"Of course pretty could never fully articulate how a face as perfect as your looks. I again am so sorry for the offen-"

"Oh that's it!"

You were interrupted by being picked up and tossed on the couch beside him before he was on top of you looking done. With a smug smirk on his face, he pinned your hands above your head with one hand before starting to tickle you with the other.

"You gonna really apologize now"

You couldn't help but laugh as he poked and squeezed your sides till you were gasping for breath. His laughter echoed in your ears as he continued to torture you.

"I-I'm sorry p-please max"

You finally gasped out and he stopped still chuckling before leaning down to peck your lip quickly.

"That's what I thought"

He declared with a look of triumph on if face. You study his face for a moment with a soft smile before you glance over to see you already looking at him.

"What, liefde?"

Max questioned, his eyes filled with curiosity. You shrugged before answer as if it was the most common phrase ever spoke.

"I just wish we could stay like this forever. Here. Just the two of us."

He softly smiled back at you taking in how relaxed and angelic you looked in the soft glow of the TV.

"Well, I don't plan on going anywhere without you. I'm here to stay as long as you'll have me."

"Mr. "Change of heart" Mr. "Leaves me all alone""

You had never minded Max having to travel to races it was a part of his job. He used to love you tagging along with him to the races, being in the paddock with all the other girlfriends and wives of the other racers, and going back to the hotel with him after to help him relax after a long day. It made sense that you wouldn't be at every race but recently it seemed like he didn't want you there at all.

There was always some last-minute reason he needed to be at the track days before free practice started and you couldn't get off work in time before he had to leave. Trips started to become longer and longer to the point he was never home. You tried your best to understand but you missed him.

You talk on the phone when possible but they were always short. He always had an excuse why he had to go. The engineers needed to talk to him about the car, Checo was waiting on him for a video, or he had made plans to hang out with one of the other drivers.

"Mr. "Never had to see me cry" Mr. "Insincere apology so he doesn't look like the bad guy""

At some point, you stopped trying to call him and just resorted to texting him. His responses were few and hours apart with a made-up reason why he hadn't answered. You were beginning to lose hope when your phone rang one day. The excitement in your voice was evident when answering the call.

"Hey Max, how's the race going?" He sighed in annoyance that you even asked. "Yeah it's fine, look we need to talk" You took a step back at his tone. He was cold or maybe even angry. This wasn't like him at all at least not the side of him you knew. "O-okay yeah. What's up? Everything alright?" You were panicking a little worried something bad had happened. Was he hurt? Did something happen at the track? "Look I just don't think this is really working out. I think we should end things." You froze in shock, this had to be a joke right? He did just say that. All you could get out was a whisper like your voice had been stolen and tears started to well up in your eyes. "W-What?" Another sigh came from his side of the phone. As if this was becoming a more tedious conversation than he had planned. "We just aren't the same anymore you know. I'm sorry, I need someone less clingy, someone who understands what I do for a living." There was a pause as you heard another voice before he continued "I got to go, Christian wants to talk about something. I'll send you any stuff you left in my apartment when I get back. Bye."

"Cause I hear he's got his arm 'round a brand-new girl. I've been picking up my heart, he's been picking up her"

The last few weeks had been nothing but painful. Ever since the break up you've had several people calling and texting you. From the girlfriends and wives you used to spend time with in the paddock check to see if you're okay to random acquaintances wanting to hear all the dirty details. It made you sick thinking about that call, you thought that would be the worst of it until you got a text from Charles Leclerc.

At first, you thought he was just another person trying to figure out what had happened. You had spoken to him multiple times and were able to joke around with each other before everything happened but you weren't surprised. At least you weren't until you opened up the messages.

Hey, I know you probably want to be left alone, but I don't want you to get blindsided by seeing later. Max is seeing someone else. None of us knew until yesterday when he brought her to the paddock and started introducing her to everyone. I just wanted to let you know instead of you finding out through the media.

All the healing you thought you had done crumbled like a house of cards. The tears started to fall before you even got to read the last message. It hadn't even been a full month. How could he have moved on so fast? Through tear-blurred gaze you decided to respond to Charles.

Thank you for letting me know.... I appreciate your honesty. You're right I would like to be left alone. I'm glad to have met you and everyone else, but I can't keep talking to you all. It hurts too much, too many memories. Hope you have a great race, Charles..... Thank you again.

Charles felt a pang of guilt reading those messages. You had always been kind to him and seemed to care a lot about everyone you came in contact with. He felt angry at Max on your behalf and wanted to help you in any way possible.

You are an amazing person chérie. I know you want to be alone but I can't abide by your wishes. Please let me be there for you. We don't have to talk about anything in particular, just tell me about your day or we can talk about our hobbies. Just let me be here for you, please?

It took you a moment before responding to the process. Charles wasn't a bad guy from what you knew of him. You had been isolating yourself from everyone the last couple of weeks not wanting to talk about everything. Maybe having someone to talk to about normal life would be nice? A sigh of defeat left as you messaged him back.

okay.... so what do like to do in your free time?

Charles softly smiles at your message. It was a start and he'll take it. He responded back quickly telling you about how he likes playing the piano and how he had released a few songs. This was a pleasant surprise for you and you told him you listen to them.

"Oh, he's so smug, Mr. "Always wins" So far above me in every sense."

The end of the racing season came quicker than you could have imagined. You and Charles had become closer than you had ever expected. He was there for you to cry to and laugh with and as your heart mended he filled in the cracks still seeping sorrow with his own love and compassion.

Sitting on a stool in his kitchen while he tried to cook you dinner, you couldn't help teasing him for his terrible cooking skills. He mocked you back at how inept you were when it came to baking. The conversation lulled as he began to focus on not burning the food before he hesitantly brought up the award ceremony. "If it's too soon I understand, but I would love for you to be my date."

You took a moment to consider the proposition. As long as you were in Charles' life Max would be in yours. You knew you would have to see him sooner or later, so why not now? With your decision made you smiled a bit.

"I would love to be your date, Charles. This is your night to celebrate a great season. I wouldn't miss it for the world."

The night arrived sooner than you had anticipated and there you were walking on Charles' arm in a velvet red dress looking in his words like an angel. You held the compliment close as you made your entrance together.

Friends and acquaintances were rightfully shocked at your attendance. They quickly came to hug you and let you know how happy they were to see you before you all were seated for the ceremony. It felt good to be around everyone again, you had missed them. Missed the funny moments and heartfelt chats. The night seemed to be shaping up to a great time.

Max made a speech when accepting his WDC trophy. He made sure to thank a woman named Kelly, who you assumed was his girlfriend, along with the normal thank you to his team.

He seemed so calm, relaxed, and perfectly fine. It had only been a few months, how could you still be recovering while he was at ease. You felt so small and lowly at that moment, looking up at him at the top of his career.

Charles, of course, noticed like he always did and grabbed your hand in his with a soft squeeze before running his thumb across your knuckles. Once the ceremony ended, the people who had not noticed you before came to say hello while others said their goodbyes.

"Now I'm Ms. "Gonna be alright someday" and someday, maybe you'll miss me. But by then, you’ll be Mr. “Too late”."

Max stood near the front smiling as he talked to some of the other racers. He was dressed in a simple black suit with a bow tie to match and a beautiful woman on his arm. You could see why he liked her, she was gorgeous and seemed to fit perfectly beside him. As the commotion around your appearance began to reach an all-time high, he looked to see who it was about.

Never did he expect to see you, in a criminally perfect red dress that hugged your curves in all the right places, hanging on to none other than Charles Leclerc. He couldn't have stopped himself from staring if he wanted to. You looked amazing and he could tell you smile was genuine.

The sharp sting of past memories hit him as he studied your body language. So open, warm, and cheerful as you spoke you Lily, he realized how much he had missed you. Once your eyes locked it was over, your grip on Charles' arms tightened as Max strides forward completely leaving his girlfriend behind.

Charles noticed your discomfort, immediately following your gaze. He thought something might happen, Max would never just let you attend without having something to say. Looking down while shaking his head, he swore so quietly you barely heard before leaning close to your ear.

"Let me know if you want to leave. It's okay if you don't wanna talk to him."

Looking up at him, you softly smiled at how empathetic he was about your feelings. The worry in his eyes was evident but you had prepared for this. Resting a hand on his chest you shook your head.

"No, it's okay. Let's just get it over with and have a great night."

“Goodbye, Mr. “Casually Cruel”, Mr. “Everything revolves around you”.”

Max's blood boiled as he watched you touching Charles. How did you even know him? You had barely spoken to the Ferrari driver during your relationship. When did you get so close to him? He would find out soon enough as he drew closer.

"Charles" He nodded to the driver after coming to a stop in front of the pair before glancing over at you.

"What are you doing here Leifde"

He hadn't meant for that to come out but it still felt natural to call you that even after all this time. It sent a surge of anger through you to have him call you that again.

"I'm not your Leifde anymore Max. You lost the right to call me that. Would hate for your girlfriend to hear you."

You sneered back like venom making it clear you did not appreciate the name. He smirks at your reaction, loving that he still has an effect on you. Turning to look back at Charles he decided to try and get a raise out of him. After all, he's the reason your here right.

"What couldn't find your own date so you settled for my ex?"

Charles' composure snapped at that. How dare Max speak about you in such a disrespectful manner. You, even on your worst nights, couldn't say a negative comment about this man and here he was acting like you were damaged goods. He went to step forward and get in Max's face when you held him back getting in between the two placing both hands on his chest. Looking up at him, hoping he would understand what you were planning to do.

"He's not worth it, amour."

You loudly spoke the last word to get Charles' attention. He snapped his head down to you at the sound of his native language on your tongue. With a cheeky smirk on your face, you lean up to whisper in his ear.

"Please just play along."

There was a hint of mischief he caught in your eye as you moved one hand slowly up to the back of his neck.

"Mon chéri, let's just go home. I wanna slip into something more...comfortable"

Not only did this make the Dutchman scoff from behind you but also stormed off mumbling something under his breath. Charles can’t take his eyes off you, not when had just hinted at being a couple to get Max to leave. He didn’t mind it. If he was honest, he had actually enjoyed the way it felt to have you holding on to him all night. You let out a sigh of relief once he was gonna looking back up at Charles. Taking a small step away you started to apologize before being cut off.

“Come on ma belle fille, let’s get you home.”

Charles smiled a sweet smile grabbing your hand to usher you out of the room.

“Goodbye, Mr. “Perfectly Fine”.”

As you and Charles arrived at your house, he broke the comfortable silence of the driver. He looked like at scolded puppy as he began to talk.

“I’m glad you came with me tonight. Sorry I almost lost my cool at the end there.”

You snicker a bit before hanging him a half shrug.

“Honestly, it felt great to put Max in his place so thank you.”

He chuckled a bit in response while shaking his head slightly. Max was an idiot for losing you and Charles wasn’t gonna make the same mistake.

“Glad you had a good night Cheri. I know this might be too soon but could I possibly take you on a date? “

He pause hesitantly before continuing to ramble on

“If it’s too soon I completely understand but I couldn’t let my chance to show you how much I liked you pass without at least-“

You cut him off by grabbing his face, pulling him in for a kiss. At first, the shock of you kissing him caused him to freeze but he quickly recovered, kissing you back with so much passion that you were left speechless. Smiling as you both pulled apart, he had to be certain.

“So, is that a yes?”

You threw you head back laughing before confirming.

“Yes Charles, I would love to go on a date with you.”

[leonstoenailunderhisbed]

What Was I Made For?

Summary: Leon, a bodyguard assigned to watch and protect his client, confesses his feelings for the reader. Although he knew he shouldn’t be involved in a relationship with his client, he still reaches out for you.

Warning: fluff/comfort. smut. afab reader. bodyguard!leon x female!reader. oral (f receiving), missionary, slight age gap (Leon is 27 and reader is 21+) loss of virginity. protected sex. CONSENTED. not proofread lol.

A/N: i got inspired by multiple things; jo and laurie, pride and prejudice, i love you and what was i made for by billie eilish. i wanted to try and write a romance so pure that it makes people cry. I think this is my cheesiest work so far.

“I have waited for this opportunity for more than half a century, to repeat to you once again my vow of eternal fidelity and everlasting love.” - Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Your father had hired a bodyguard to protect you while he was away. He loved you, like any father would, but his work seemingly came first. Not that you had any word in it anyway. It seemed that most of the choices he made for you were clearly out his heart and not out malice.

But when the tall, muscular, blonde man entered your own house, you couldn't help but feel a little angry. Not at the stranger, he was just hired to do his job, you were mostly mad at your dad for even thinking you didn't have what it takes to defend yourself. You hated feeling small and be seen as weak but again, there was nothing you could about it except take it.

Leon was his name, Leon Scott Kennedy. He's quiet, blunt, and always had a serious expression on his face. You couldn't read him- no one could, really. It was a little unsettling but overtime you grew closer to him.

He'd help you out when you needed a ride, he would reach the highest shelf when you wanted something from the pantry; he was a man you can depend on. And he, too, grew to care about you.

What you didn’t know was that every time he saw you or was with you, his heart would skip a beat. His entire being would feel like that satisfying part of a song; the bridge or the chorus or whichever part it may be. He felt complete, but he also felt empty. For how could a girl like you love him like he loved you?

Fear. He was scared, scared that you might push him away and abandon him like everyone has. That he’d have to fetch for himself again and live in solitude until his job required him to be sent away.

And so he buried these feelings deep down. He promised to himself that in order to not get hurt, he’d tough it out. That he won’t soften on you; he promised himself to stay a strong man and not let the wild emotions in his heart deter him from doing his job. And that’s what he did. Feelings were deeper than six feet, never to be resurfaced again.

Tonight was rough for you, so you found yourself in a bar. You didn't tell Leon, why should he know about this? He'd run off and tell your father about you drinking and getting with some random guy.

So, you turned off your location and put your phone on 'Do Not Disturb.' You needed an escape, a break from current reality. And what better way than to spend it on drinking away.

But you couldn't get one drink in without him bursting through the doors of the bar. His eyes landed on you, and he dashed towards you, "What are you doing here?"

His fingers wrapped around your wrist before the cup of liquor could touch your lips. You furrowed your brows and stared at his scowl, he looked beyond pissed. You knew he had every right to feel that way but at the same time, you desperately wanted to be away for a while.

"How did you find me?" you asked him.

"I'm a government agent, Y/n. I have my ways," He replied as he took your glass and put it back down on the bar table, "C'mon, let's get you home."

He pulled you up by gently taking your forearm, he guided the two of you out and away from the bar.

“No, Leon, I don’t want to go home. I want-“

“I don’t care what you want, this isn’t safe for you. I will take you back whether you like it or not,” he quickly turned to look you. He was mad and his face was not hiding it.

With a sigh, you reluctantly let him take you away. He ended taking you both to his apartment as your place was quite literally one hour away and it was dead in the night.

“What were you thinking?” He seethed through gritted teeth, “What if something had happened to you, huh? Were you just planning on getting drunk? How would you have gotten back home if I didn’t get there?”

You were currently sitting down on his couch, wearing his clothes that he let you borrow since you didn’t feel comfortable in the dress you were wearing. Right now, he was going through one of his heated lectures where it made you feel like a child. Curse him and his authorative voice.

“What were you even doing there? That’s not a place you belong and you know it,” he stood in front of you as he glared down at you.

“I don’t know, I needed a break,” you mumbled.

Leon scoffed and deepened his furrowed brows, “A break? From what? What could possibly make you want to go to one of the most dangerous place a woman could ever be in. Don’t you ever think about your safety? What if a man had taken advantage of you and you’d gone missing by tomorrow morning?” Leon sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he paced around his living room.

His apartment was nice- small but cozy. It was very him, in a way. Minimal decor with blank walls, devoid of any pictures. He never takes pictures and you realized this a long time ago when he’d gaze at the walls in your house, staring at your pictures when you were young. He liked them but he also felt jealous. Leon didn’t have these pictures. But he did have memories he wished he could keep forever.

He was beyond stressed for you. He wouldn’t have forgiven himself if anything had happened to you. As these thought ran through his mind, he couldn’t help but feel a small tug at the string in his heart. Something he knew all too well. A feeling he’s been keeping locked away seemed to be coming back at the wrong time.

“Leon, give me a break. I just wanted to have some fun,” you mumbled as you looked at him pace back and forth like a madman. You knew he was concerned for you, but was that really it? Just concern?

“Fun? Your idea of fun is getting drunk and have creeps around you? Bullshit, Y/n. Bullshit,” he quickly retaliated.

“What was the real reason? And don’t lie to me, I can tell when you’re lying,” he grumbled and stopped pacing to look back at you.

You sighed, “I… I wanted to be cool. All my friends have gone out and had fun but not me. I’m always cooped up like a prisoner. When am I going to have my fun?”

His eyes softened slightly, very slightly, but he was still scowling at you. Do not break, is what he repeatedly told himself.

“Leon, I’m an adult. I want to make stupid decisions. I want to get drunk and have sex with random strangers,” you looked down at your hands playing with the drawstrings of the sweatpants you were wearing, “I wanted to get drunk and… lose my virginity,” you whispered.

He stood frozen in place, but then he sighed and rubbed his face with his hand, “Jesus Christ, Y/n… you’re-“

He looked at you exasperatedly, “You’re way too young to be going out and drinking with random guys— especially like this.” He leaned over you, placing his hands on the couch armrests on either side of your body before continuing. “God, I could smack you right now for being so stupid.”

He obviously didn’t mean it but he couldn’t help it. You worried him, you made him want to act irrational every time something bad was threatening you.

Your eyes slightly widened from how close he got but you weren’t complaining, “Too young?” You repeated in a whisper. You furrowed your brows and leaned closer to his face, “I’m not being stupid. It’s embarrassing being a virgin at this age. When did you lose your virginity, huh?” You quickly instigated.

“At 21,” Leon replied, his scowl lessening as he noticed that you leaned in closer. “And I was sober, too.”

His eyes remained fixated on your eyes and he stared deeply into them, “You are still too young though. That’s what I’m trying to say. When someone tells you, live your life, they don’t literally mean being in the center of danger."

You groaned and leaned back against the couch, seemingly frustrated, “I’m an adult, Leon.”

You rubbed your eyes and then looked at him, “All my friends have had sex before and I’m still seen like a fucking nun. At least you lost your virginity, who knows when I’m going to lose it,” you grumbled and crossed your arms over your chest.

He was quiet for a bit. He paced around some more before speaking again with a stern tone. "Just because you're an adult-- barely, I might add-- doesn't mean you know everything. Hell, you're still a virgin for a reason."

He sat down on the couch next to you as he tried to think of what else to say. Leon sighed and leaned forward, his elbows now resting on his knees as he looked back at you, "I can just picture it if you do go home with some guy."

Leon puts his hands back to the armrests, "Idiot pulls your pants down, gets on top of you and finishes in two seconds-"

“But at least I’ll get fucked, right?” You interjected and looked away, “It’ll be nice if someone did that, except the finishing quickly- obviously.”

“I mean- that’s gotta be an exaggeration too, right? Who finishes in two seconds?” You mumbled and looked back at him.

Leon sighs, his gaze softening slightly. He opens his mouth to say something before stopping and closing it again, “Jesus…” He takes a deep breath before speaking again. “No, it’s really not an exaggeration. There are a good number of guys who think that they’re in a movie when they’re with a girl like you. And then—“

Leon leans in close to you and grabs your arm, “You’ll hate yourself if you lose your virginity this way.”

You looked at his eyes and then sighed, “So what should I do? Be the only one who hasn’t slept with anyone before? I haven’t even kissed anyone and that is embarrassing. Everyone’s kissed someone before but not me,” you muttered.

You didn’t mind him grabbing your arm, you didn’t even notice it since you were too deep into the conversation. Why did he care anyway? It’s not like he’s going to tell your dad about this, is he?

He wouldn’t. You and him both knew he wouldn’t betray you like that. Because you both knew that deep down, feelings were there. Feelings that made the two of you act exactly like this. Like kids fighting.

“I know I’m still young but c’mon… you know kids my age have done things… I don’t want to be left out, you whispered.

“Goddamnit..” Leon groaned and grabbed the other arm, holding them in both of his huge, calloused hands, “Stop being so damn self-conscious.” He glared down at you, the intensity of his eyes nearly causing your heart rate to spike a bit.

“And stop thinking about other people. You’re young and you’ve already lost the most important one…” Leon leans in even closer to you, almost so close that your noses are touching.

You furrowed your brows confused, “I have?” You muttered, “I haven’t…” your voice trailed off as you tried to look away but you couldn’t. His blue eyes were piercing right through your eyes as both your noses were so close to touching.

He stared at you in silence, his nostrils flaring from his deep breathing. Then, without warning, he kissed you firmly on the lips, his lips meeting yours for a few solid seconds. Freezing as you felt his lips on yours, not realizing what he was doing, but then you melted. Your heart was beating so fast but you didn’t protest. You closed your eyes for those few seconds and when he pulled back you looked at him with a dazed look. He sighed and took a deep breath before speaking again, “Idiot.”

“Why… you…” you stuttered as you tried to think of something to say. Your cheeks were coated pink as you licked your lips, still tasting his lips on your lips.

Leon leaned back and glanced at you. His face was flushed, but his expression was nothing but a mix of pure tenderness and soft longing. He rubbed his thumb against the side of your cheek and looked down into your eyes before speaking in a tender, whispery voice,

“Because you won’t listen, you know you’ll regret it if you do something like that with some guy, and I didn’t want that to happen to you.”

His heart was beating out of his chest, he couldn’t believe he’d just done that but he didn’t regret it. If he could have a little bit of you, he’d take it with him to his grave.

“So… you did it instead…” you mumbled as you looked at him with big eyes. Your pupils were dilated as you stared at his eyes and then down at his lips. Then your eyes shifted back to his blue eyes again. It was unbelievable that he took it upon himself to give you your first kiss. And it left you wanting more. But was that allowed?

He looked down at your lips for a moment before looking back up. He noticed your wide, glazed over eyes, the rapid breathing, and how your cheeks were coated in pink. He noticed everything about you in this moment.

He leaned back in, close enough to be right in front of your face. Then, he placed his hand back on the side of your cheek and pulled you in for a second kiss, “I’d rather it be me instead of some guy who’ll probably just abandon you the moment they finish.”

His second kiss made you melt, you closed your eyes and brought your hand to the back of his head as you moved to straddle his lap. Once he pulled back, you looked at him, “Does that mean… you’ll take my virginity too?” You asked quietly. The question made you nervous but you still had to know if he’d do everything you just mentioned.

Leon had to take a deep breath in and out as he was getting ahead of himself here. He was barely holding back in his own eyes, and you could tell that he wanted to do so many things to you in just this moment.

But his answer was a slow nod, “Yes… I will.”

To which you could only respond with kissing him again. He grabbed your hips as you straddled him, taking you in one of his arms while you leaned down for the kiss. He moaned softly as your lips met once again for another long moment. He sighed slowly once you pulled away, leaning you back against his arm, “God, do you know how tempting it is to just carry you to my room right now and do everything to you?”

“Please do it,” you whispered as you looked down at him, your chest panting. You wanted him to absolutely wreck you. To make your first time unforgettable.

He groaned deeply at your words and lifted you off of his arm. He then picked you up, carrying you in his arms as he walked into the hall. Leon carried you into his room, and then gently laid you down on his bed, climbing on top of you and pinning you down once he did.

There were many things Leon expected in his life but none of them ever led to this moment. Sure, he’d be fine with kissing you and then pulling away to keep you safe. But that’s not what you wanted either. His heart kept pulling and pulling but he tried so hard to fight it. He tried not to fall too deep. Keyword tried.

Leon looked down at you as you lay there with your hair sprawled out and your legs spread open. Your blushing cheeks paired with your wide, dreamy eyeballs made it easy for him to feel something deep in his gut. He leaned down to your neck and began to kiss and bite it, “You have no idea about the things you make me feel.”

You closed your eyes and rolled your head back to give him more space to keep giving you hickeys on your neck. Your hands wrapped around the back of his head, gently tugging at his hair. You bit down on your bottom lip to try and suppress moans and whimpers daring to leave your throat.

“Leon,” you moaned softly as he kissed and bit your neck.

He couldn’t help it. When you tugged at his hair, his eyes rolled back for a moment from how good it felt. When you moaned his name, he had to bite your neck one last time before leaning back on his knees and taking off his shirt.

His muscly body was on display as he unbuttoned his fly and took his pants off, going back on top of you to pin you down against the bed again, “God, you have no idea how much I’ve wanted to do this.”

He remained in his boxer-briefs and you couldn’t help but just stare at the hot man on top of you. Heart palpitations increased as you noticed the look he had on his face- pure lust and… love?

“Me too,” you whispered as you also hastily took off your shirt and sweatpants, tossing them away to God knows where.

You both seemed to have been wanting this. It would be a lie if chemistry didn’t exist between the two of you, but it was something that was kept away and ignored. There were so many things that go against the two of you and yet, you both have found yourselves in this moment. Entangled by the strings of both of your hearts pulling you together as one puzzle piece.

As soon as he saw you down to your bra and panties, it was enough for Leon’s blood to boil and he didn’t have the capacity to wait any longer. He pulled them off of you faster than you could react, leaving you completely naked on his bed. He grinned down at you, taking one of your hands and guiding it over his chest so you could feel his muscles.

“You’re beautiful,” he muttered, looking at you like you were his angel- his goddess. A siren that captured his heart.

Your cheeks got even more red as he guided your hand to his muscly chest, causing you to whine quietly.

His smirk grew and his eyes sparkled with mischief as they looked down at you. With one hand wrapped around yours and the other at the small of your back, he leaned down to softly bite your neck again.

This was the perfect moment for him, he felt like he could finally be closer to you. To finally feel you for the first time. A renaissance, a revival of the piece of art that was under him. The rebirth of happiness.

He paused for a moment and stared down at you before leaning in yet again, “Y/n…”

“God, just ruin me,” you whispered as he leaned down on your neck again to bite and kiss it. Pink and purple spots beginning to coat your delicate skin from the hickeys and love-bites. That man was desperate, deprived of love and you could tell by the way he was handling your body. It was like fire spreading through your body, the warm sensation running down your skin as he licked and nipped every crevice of your neck and collarbone. Marking you, claiming you, loving you.

He felt his entire body vibrate as those words left your lips. His eyes began to roll back one last time and he groaned lowly. Without waiting for another moment, Leon started to slowly move his head southward. He gently ran his hands along the side of your body as he kissed and bit your shoulders, chest, and then the top of your breasts.

“Leon,” you moaned softly as he began to kiss your breasts, feeling them become even more sensitive. Your nipples were hard from arousal to the point where they ached for more. Your hands wrapped around his head as your fingers interlaced with his blond hair, pulling him closer to your chest.

He was being gently encouraged to stay there. To continue to torture you. And he did. Once you tell a dog to stay, he stays. And god, he’d be a dog for you if you asked him to. To him, you were the warmth of the sun shining through his window.

To him, you were the reason he wakes up early in the morning.

To him, you were the reason why even bothered to stay.

To him, you were everything.

With one hand still holding yours, the other one moved to the side of your thigh to hold your leg in place. He kissed your chest again, this time with more intensity as his hands gripped your thigh even tighter. One hand slid up your thigh, slowly teasing the line of your underwear.

You both have longed for this. The unspoken words exchanged through glances said enough.

The way you spoke his name in a soft, breathy voice was enough to send a bolt of electricity through his body. He liked what he was doing to you, he really did.

He leaned in again, this time placing his mouth right on the line where his hand was. His fingers pulled your panties to the side as his eyes set on your wet cunt. He used his tongue to lightly brush back and forth, barely even teasing you. And then, without warning, he slid his fingers inside you.

You closed your eyes tightly shut and arched your back, “Leon!” You whimpered and moaned softly. It all felt so fulfilling.

His tongue, his hands- it all sent wave after wave of pleasure. Your hands gripped his bedsheets as you moaned his name like a prayer.

“Leon, Leon, Leon,” you breathed out.

You were so sweet and soft when you were at this state. That was something he loved about you. And when you were begging for him like this? It was enough for every part of him to get a little hot.

He slid his fingers in deeper, moving his fingers around a bit before curling them and moving them inside you. All while his mouth and tongue nipped at your clit.

He moaned softly as he did, still teasing you with his tongue. You tasted sweet. A sweet nectar that drove him over the edge. Well not really but he could. He could cum just now from how delicious your pussy tasted.

His tongue dragged along your wet folds, eliciting a shuddered moan from you. He loved your reactions, three way his touch affected you so much when he felt like he was doing nothing.

He’d do more if you let him into your heart, he thought.

“Oh my god,” you breathed out as he curled his fingers, “Leon,” you moaned softly in a whiny voice.

Leon’s body was twitching from all the noises you were spouting and the way your legs were squirming. It was a perfect mix of adorable and tantalizing in the best way possible.

He knew you were about to cum, given the fact your moans became more short and breathy. You merge began to twitch just a little and he had to grip your thighs to hold them down.

His fingers moved faster, his tongue moved quicker, but most importantly, the strength of his grasp on you and himself increased. He was close to losing himself at this point, ready to reach his peak at any moment.

“Leon!” You moaned a little too loud. Your back arched as your toes curled when you came on his face. His tongue and fingers made you feel like you reached heaven- nirvana too.

He moaned loudly as you released yourself against his face, grabbing onto your hips to keep you in place and prevent you from slipping away from him. But even so, he could taste and smell you on him, and the sight of such a pretty girl in this state turned him on infinitely more.

His blue eyes barely visible from his dilated pupils, his blonde hair shining from the light of his room, how your cum dripped down his face. But you couldn’t help but shift your focus to his lips. They were so much more plump than before and he had this look like he just struck gold.

At that moment, he pulled his hand out from between your legs and moved it to your shoulder, moving your leg and hand away from him.

He slowly sat up and leaned close to your ear again, “You taste so sweet I want to keep you all to myself,” he whispered.

You couldn’t believe you had my first orgasm from his tongue and fingers, you were left a panting mess. But that wasn’t the end. You looked up at him and kissed him as he was still on top of you. You could taste yourself on his lips and it caused you to moan just a little bit. And he groaned when you kissed him.

He broke the kiss off once more, breathing heavily and staring down at you. Your body was still covered in a slight glow from the orgasm you just had. His eyes were fixed on yours, his lips wet with your taste.

"God, I need you," he breathed in a low tone, staring back at your body.

“I need you too,” you whispered as you wrapped your hands around his neck and pulled him down with you. Your lips finding his again and his hands immediately went to your waist.

He groaned deeply as he kissed you again, diving back into the heat of the moment as his body was filled with every emotion in the book.

He felt something in that moment though… he felt something he’s only felt a few times in his life, something that could really take him to the highest heights and then throw him down to the lowest depths.

“I love you,” he whispered softly as he breathed out, looking deeply in your eyes and staring at you with pure adoration.

His tone, his words, his eyes- he meant it. And you knew it.

Your eyes were full of pure adoration as well. In this moment you had realized that this time, you had fallen for him. You loved him too.

The stolen glances from when you were in the same room, when he’s had to help you out countless times, when he comforted you on your lowest days, and when he would make you the happiest by remembering your favorite things. He was more than just a bodyguard to you. He became your world.

“I love you too,” you whispered back. You stared deeply into his eyes as your fingers gently brushed away blonde strands of hair from his face.

His heart was beating rapidly as he took in every single touch and movement you made to him. From the strokes of your fingers, to your soft voice, to the stare of admiration in your eyes, to the way you spoke to his face.

He was all yours now, this girl who was his to protect and cherish until his last breath.

There was no hiding how much he loved you by the way his eyes looked at you. It was clear in this moment that his feelings for you were genuine and honest. He didn't like you just because you were pretty and cute. He loved you for all of who you were.

He could feel tears stinging the back of his eyes as he leaned in and kissed you lightly, "I'll protect you until the day I die," he told you, staring deeply into your eyes.

His body was trembling as his heart beat against his chest again from these words. This was a feeling he truly didn't deserve. How could this girl love someone like him so much?

Your words brought out the feelings in his heart that he so desperately wanted to keep hidden away. He took in every moment of this, the way your eyes looked at him and the way your delicate hands were touching his face.

He felt complete. The strings playing at his heart were in your mercy and he wouldn’t want it any other way.

He pulled you in even tighter than he had ever done before. His hands were all over you as he kissed you repeatedly once more, his lips pressing against your own as your own taste filled his mouth once again.

He didn’t want to stop. He didn’t want this moment to end.

He wanted to live in this moment forever.

He pulled away from you once more, looking straight down at your body with his blue eyes looking down at you, "You know, you're the first girl to ever really make me feel this way.” he muttered.

“Me too,” you whispered as you stared up at him with the same level of adoration and love.

No matter how many times you could deny it, you felt just the same as he did in this very moment. Your heart felt like it would combust at any moment from the fact that your feelings are being reciprocated. That you both felt the exactly same thing if not even more. And that was enough for you to want to be with him. Regardless of him being your bodyguard.

“I want you,” you whispered.

A warm feeling ran through his entire body after hearing these words. This was something he could never truly describe, a feeling that was so strong yet so light at the same time. The love coming from you was enough to give him an uncontrollable urge to make all of his fantasies and desires come true. He couldn't resist you anymore, not with this level of mutual love between the two.

"I want you too," he whispered back. "Just promise me one thing. Promise me that, no matter what happens, I'll never lose you."

“Say it,” he begged, “Promise me I’ll never lose you…” he begged in a whisper. It was a plea, he dreaded the idea of losing you. He wanted you forever. Just the mere thought of you being away from his arms was enough to make his heart shatter a bit.

He needed to hear you say it. To tell him everything was going to be okay and you’ll forever be his. Because at the end of the day, no matter how much shit he’s been through, he also dreams of having his true love by his side every time he wakes up.

“I promise,” you whispered, “I promise you’ll never lose me… if you let me have you.”

One simple sentence from your soft lips and he was ready to melt and fall at your feet. He was yours and you were his in that moment.

"You have me," was what he responded with, as he gently leaned in to kiss your neck and jaw again.

“And you have me,” you closed your eyes as you whispered to him. You wrapped your hands around his hair as your hips bucked against his

"I've always had you," he spoke in barely audible tone as it was filled with the sounds of wet kisses.

His hand slid down your side again, gently sliding underneath your hip to hold you in place as he began to bite your neck again. All of his attention was now on you, and there was no longer another thought in his mind.

You moaned softly at his kisses and touches, “Leon,” you breathed out as you tugged at his hair.

His breath hitched and he pulled back slowly, his blue eyes gazing down at you as you squirmed around under him. His lips were swollen from the heat of your kisses and his jaw was clenched tightly from the pure pleasure rushing down his body.

He sighed softly for a moment and his eyes trailed down to the dresser next to the bed. He picked up the condoms from the drawer, opened the pack and opened one of them, before looking back up at you.

As much as he’d love to do it raw, he would never hurt his baby. His girl. His darling. He wasn’t that kind of man. No… he’s better than that.

"I'll go slowly, okay?"

You nodded and stared as he opened the condom, “Yeah… I’m okay with that,” you reassured in a quiet voice, a small and shy smile tugging at your lips.

He felt something in his heart when seeing that small, shy smile. It hurt how cute you were. The way you said your words in that shy voice and the little smile, it all made his heart ache with happiness.

"You're so beautiful," he muttered softly before leaning in, "I hope this is everything you've thought it would be.”

With a lot of care and time, he pulled down his boxer-briefs and put the condom on. He made sure it was nice and snug. He hovered over you for a moment, his hands slowly moving to your waist and hip.

"Promise me you'll tell me if it hurts the first time, alright?” He whispered as he slowly shifted back over top of you, making sure he was positioned just right.

You nodded as you felt him position himself while being on top of you, “I will,” you reassured. Your hands found their way to his back as you embraced him.

He nodded back as he took a slow, steady breath in and out. He could feel your touch through his back, your hands slowly running along his back as he slowly entered you for the very first time.

You felt his cock slowly enter your cunt and it made you grip his shoulder blades as you closed your eyes.

He groaned softly as he sighed in relief, slowly pushing himself in until his pelvic made contact with you. He held himself in place and looked into your eyes for approval. To know that everything was okay before he’d start thrusting into you.

Your eyes closed tightly as your nails dig into his skin, he felt big or maybe you were tight, who knows. But it felt good. You opened your eyes and stared at him, giving him a nod that it didn’t hurt and everything was okay.

He sighed softly in relief, feeling the grip from your hands around his body tighten for a moment as his body relaxed from his slight worries.

"You feel amazing," was all he could muster out as he slowly and gentle began to rock back and forth, starting to move inside of you as he leaned back onto his knees again for support. As he began to thrust into you, your moans and his grunts echoed through his room as the bed gently creaked from his rocking.

The sight of you under him and the noises of your moans were enough to have his mind go blank from all of the thoughts.

His body was shaking as his heart thumped loudly in his chest. He felt the warmth of you around him and he couldn't think straight. He started to move in and out of you slowly, his grunts growing louder as time felt like it had stopped for the two of you.

His hands gripped the back of your thighs more firmly as his hands moved along your back again to have more of your body pressed up against his.

Your moans and his grunts were lost in his room as he began to move. The bed began to creak at his movements, slowly and gently slamming against the back wall. Your hands were gripping and scratching his back out of pleasure, it was a type of fulfillment that made you drunk on him. That made you addicted to everything about him. And you wanted to be selfish and keep him to yourself.

“Leon,” you moaned softly against his ear.

His breathing steadily got quicker as he leaned in closer to you. Your moans only fed the fire inside of him and made him move faster and harder. His lips were brushing and nibbling on your neck while he continued.

His back was arching as your nails dug deeper upon his skin. His breathing was quickening and he groan out your name, "Y/n..."

You were close to your second climax of the day, you felt like puddy or mush in his hands. His touch melted you into whatever he wanted- you wouldn’t even complain.

Your back arched and you pressed my breasts against his chest, “Leon,” you breathed out. Your moans began to get more airy and short.

He leaned down back to kiss you while he rocked faster and harder into you. He could feel the warmth of the room fill up with pure steam as sweat covered both of you. The kiss sloppy and wet, not even a real kiss since the two of you were moaning and grunting out of pleasure.

His grip tightened on you as he moaned your name again, his hands now grabbing onto yours and squeezing them tightly as his hips moved back and forth. His interlocked his hand with yours as he thrusted into you, his cock filling you. A sensation that drove you insane in the best way.

"Almost there," he whispered, his breathing growing heavy around you.

“Me too,” you whispered back as you closed your eyes and let him look down at your face. Your jaw slightly open as you moaned and whimpered.

He couldn’t help but stare at your face, he thought you looked beautiful like this. His eyes scanned every little detail about your face and body, wanting to remember this forever. If he could, he’d definitely have this moment hanged up on the wall of his apartment. A memory so important to him that he’d have no shame in showing you off. But he wouldn’t do that. You were his and he didn’t want anyone else but him to look at you like this.

Your walls were beginning to clump down on his cock. You were close to cumming for the second time today, which surprised you because you’ve never done this before.

Soon, you did climax on him while he kept going. Your body convulsed and fell limp under him as he chased his own high. Your eyes were half-lidded as you were overrun with that satisfied and happy feeling that came with the post-orgasm jitters.

He sighed deeply as he felt you throb around his cock. Your body shook and your head rolled back as the climax overwhelmed your body and flooded it with endorphins.

He groaned softly as he finally reached his climax, moaning out your name in such a heated tone. He was glad he was wearing a condom, but god did the thought of breeding ran through his head at least once.

He let loose with a loud groan as he came inside you, with the condom still on. His cock began to pulse inside of you as a surge of pleasure flooded his body with everything it ever needed.

He laid down on top of you, panting heavily as his sweat soaked body pressed up against you. His hands went back to their usual spot and laid against your hips as he breathed in sharply, his heart beat quickening even more.

"Oh God," he moaned, his eyes slowly closing in relief. He wanted to be inside you forever. You just felt so good. Too good, he’d say but he didn’t care. He wanted you. So. Much.

Your hands lazily drew circles on his back as you closed your eyes as well and let him fall on top of you. Letting out a deep sigh out of pleasure and relief, you couldn’t help but feel your heart also tug its strings.

“Thank you,” you whispered quietly. If you were asked who would’ve you wanted to have sex with, you’d only say Leon. He knows how to make you happy, he knows how to cheer you and make you feel this good. He knows you. Probably than you know yourself too.

He groaned softly as he heard those words, leaning a little back at you from his position. He leaned down to kiss you softly and gently, breathing in the scent of your hair as he looked into your eyes, his hair falling in front of his eyes, covering half of his face.

"You're welcome," he whispered back, his voice low, calm and soft as he laid back down on you with his face buried into your neck. He pulled you closer and wrapped his arms around your waist.

One thing he couldn't deny in this moment was how perfect this girl was to him. There was something about you that just made him feel complete, something that made everything in life just make sense.

"I love you," he whispered, his eyes still being closed.

“I love you too,” you whispered and closed your eyes as you wrapped your arms around him too. Basking yourself under his weight and warmth- albeit the sweat sticking you two together.

Your breathing slowed down from panting. You felt exhausted but it was worth it. You both needed a shower but you were too lazy right now- you both were too lazy to even move an inch.

This moment was one that he would keep dear to himself for all time. The feel of your skin, the smell of you and the warmth of your body all made him feel home. His fingers were running through your hair, and his breathing was becoming more normal again in that moment.

"We probably need to shower soon," he muttered as he kissed your neck one last time.

“Two more minutes,” you whispered as you held on to him tighter.

He sighed softly into your neck as he lay his forehead against yours. His eyes still closed as he chuckled at your request.

"Fine, two minutes before we get up," he whispered as his breath was still soft against your skin.

You sighed contently and relaxed under him. There were many things to do; get rid of the used condom, take a shower, and do aftercare. But for now, all you needed was to be with him. To feel loved.

And so you did, spending those two extra minutes together. Your bodies were still tightly intertwined, his head pressing against your neck as he gave you little kisses every now and then.

But eventually, his eyes opened and you could hear him sigh again as he shifted his body to be on his side rather than on top of you.

“So… ready for that shower?” You turned your head to the side and as he moved next to you instead of being on top of you.

"Yeah, I think it's about time we finally do so," he sighed as he rolled off of the bed. He stretched his arms upwards and you could hear his back crack at the stretch.

"I’m sticky with sweat all over," he chuckled, grabbing the blanket and placing it over your body before standing up and walking to the bathroom.

You giggled, “Don’t forget the condom,” you teased as he was still wearing the now used condom. You pulled the blanket aside and walked over to him to the bathroom.

He stopped once he heard your teasing, his body freezing from his pace as he looked down between his legs. He groaned as his face turned scarlet from embarrassment, he slowly turned around as all of his cocky confidence disappeared in a single second.

He let loose a laugh and took it off before flicking it into the bin.

He looked back at you and smirked weakly, "I'm going to pretend that never happened."

You chuckled and walked into the bathroom first, “It’s okay, don’t get embarrassed. It happens to hot people,” you grinned as you pulled him to the bathroom by the hands.

"Yeah, whatever," was all he could mumble as he stepped into the bathroom, his arm moving to the sink to turn on the faucet. Although, his smirk and slight snort didn’t go unnoticed by you. It made you happy that you could still tease and have fun with him during these moments.

"I'd say something back but you're pretty hot yourself so I'm not going to talk," he grumbled.

He looked over the shower at you with a raised eyebrow. Leon leaned back against the sink for support and folded his arms over his chest, a small smirk appearing on his face as he was beginning to calm down from his embarrassment.

"Cold," he answered back, without hesitation.

Scrunching up your face, you shook your head disapprovingly, “Cold? Seriously? What, do you live in the North Pole or something?” You joked as you turned the temperature adjustment to cold like he said.

A single chuckle left his mouth as he glared at you, "Shut up," he frowned with a slight giggle, "Don't tell me you're one of those people that likes burning hot water during a shower?"

“Actually yes, I love hot and steamy showers that burn my skin,” you mumbled as you joined him on the cold shower. You wrapped your arms around your body as you shivered, “Holy shit, dude. This is freezing,” you muttered through chittering teeth.

He put his hand around your waist once again and pulled you closer to his body, his chest pressing against your back as he pulled you into his embrace. His body growing warmer than yours as his hand began to rub your stomach. His body heat slowly transferred over to yours.

He sighed quietly and turned the knob up, changing the temperature to a warm feeling, although still not hot. You could feel his hands still wrap around you as his one hand went down underneath your chin and pulled your head back so you'd look at him.

He cupped your face with his hand and brushed your hair back out of your face, "There, is that better?" he asked you as he smirked and looked at you.

“Actually it is,” you huffed and turned back to begin cleaning your body.

He smirked and began to clean himself as well. His eyes gazing at you as the hot water ran down his body. His eyes traveled around every inch of your body as he took a look at you, he couldn't help but feel like he was staring at an image of beauty as you began to bathe yourself.

He couldn’t help it, he wrapped his arms wrapped around your waist from the side as they pulled you back into his form. He couldn’t help it, he loved this sight a little too much. It was so innocent and yet so attractive to him. You could be doing the simplest thing and he’d love it.

He continued to watch you soap yourself up, his face having a hint of a dreamy look in his eyes. His gaze traced your entire body, taking in your curves and how beautiful you were to him as he breathed in deeply.

"You have a beautiful body, you know that," he whispered.

You chuckled and kept lathering yourself in soap, “You think so?” You whispered.

He smirked and nodded his head as he continued to trace you with his eyes, his gaze admiring every single part of your body.

"More than beautiful," he sighed as his eyes continued to wander across your form. He couldn't help but wonder how he had gotten this lucky to have someone as perfect as you in his life.

"The prettiest face I've ever seen too. You're like a goddess to me," he moaned. He put his head against the side of your neck and kissed it softly as his hands moved up and down your body.

"Every inch of you is perfect," he murmured, "I'd say you're even better than a dream."

One could tell he was so madly in love. He never felt love like this, not this strong. And he wanted more. You broke him in the best way possible.

This version of Leon became a version that he hid away and promised himself to never bring back. Yet, in all the time that he’s been your bodyguard, you’ve managed to make him break that promise. His feelings took hold of him, probably for the first time in a while. But this time, he decided not to fight it.

This time, he decided to stay true to himself and let himself be loved and love the one girl who dared enough to love his broken self.

And he couldn’t ask for anything better.

[ohdeerfully]

omg hi! I love your writing! I had an alastor x reader request for an idea I can’t get out of my head! Imagine him and the reader secretly pining for each other as besties but just can’t admit it to each other (or themselves lmao). So alastor talks to Rosie about it and she is so shocked that he likes a girl! And after some time the reader decides to go ask Rosie for advice due to her being alastor other bestie and she kinda plays matchmaker for them!

Thank you for reading this and I hope you like the idea! No worries if not tho 💖

hi love! i split this into two parts (second part is already written and posted!), i hope that's okay! reader is also i love mutual pining its so yummy

thanks for the request!

Mutual Dilemma (i)

Alastor x Reader part i part ii TW: none!

join my discord!

◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈

Alastor knew plenty of things about himself and those around him—this was something of a skill he gained throughout his time in Hell as an Overlord. His all-smiles personality, at least to those that didn’t take the ‘myth’ of the Radio Demon seriously enough, earned him plenty of trusting acquaintances that provided him with constant, easy information. He was always confident in this way of things.

But you—just some seemingly ordinary demon at the Hazbin Hotel—you confused him. You made him unsure of himself. When it came to you, there were so many unknown, confusing emotions that made his mind and body swirl with discomfort. There was only one thing he could accept within himself as truth–

He hated you. 

He hated you simply for the fact that he didn’t understand you, and you made him doubt himself. Alastor was so used to picking apart the inner workings of those he came across, but everytime the two of you interacted he always found his mind lost and unable to think as if he were a drunk man. Maybe you were doing it on purpose to taunt him; you were placed here by Heaven itself to torture him.

Truthfully he wanted to avoid you at all costs in order to preserve what was left of his sanity, but as time passed it became increasingly difficult as you were aggravatingly involved with the various hotel matters. You had quickly become close friends with Charlie Morningstar herself, so where she was you were likely nearby… so it was nearly impossible to not see you everyday considering his own duties to the hotel.

Currently he had sat himself on an eccentric red armchair in the lobby, hands politely folded over his lap as he observed the conversation in front of him—Vaggie, Charlie, and you were discussing some plan to attract more residents to the hotel, sitting cross-legged by a low table. The group would rarely turn to him for any input, but that matter didn’t really bother him—he was never much help, anyway.

Every now and then Alastor would catch your eyes tentatively look away from the spread of papers on the table to take a peek at him, and each time he would stare back in his usual manner; a spreading, malicious grin and slight tilt in the head, which always made you shoot back to attention to your task. He wasn’t sure why you kept looking, though, but he just chalked it up to the typical sense of fear and anxiety demons usually felt in his presence.

He didn’t fail to notice the light pang in his chest each time he caught your eyes—a weird, twisting feeling of emotion that he couldn’t recognize. He wanted nothing more than to tear those eyes of yours right out for even looking his way since they seemed to be the culprit of the discomfort; but, at the same time, it was like a mysterious force held him incapable of laying a hand on you and cursed his body with even more of those strange feelings at the mere idea of you being hurt.

It was something he never really cared to explore too deeply within himself as he was content with simply believing it would pass with time. 

◈

You, on the other hand, wanted nothing more than to explore the strong emotions that you actually were able to recognize as love; or, something similar… love was a strong word to use when referring to the Radio Demon of all creatures in Hell.

Still, it hurt your soul to see the complete and utter lack of care towards your existence in general that he seemed to hold for you. He played friends when it mattered, which was particularly in cases like this when Charlie, Vaggie, him, and you were all trying to plan something—with mostly Charlie doing the work, you were kind of just her yes-man—but otherwise he seemed to just… avoid you. Ignore you unless it came with some benefit.

Everybody knew how the Radio Demon went about relationships, and you weren’t any less wise, but it still hurt. You could convince yourself to be happy with just a friendship with the guy, but even that was impossible when any opportunity you had to get closer to him was met with that deranged grin. You couldn’t find yourself afraid of it, though, because alongside the swimming malice in his crimson eyes there was also a hint of… confusion or doubt, like a child learning something terrifying or life-changing. Of course, maybe you were just delusional.

Charlie’s hand brushed against your arm, and you realized you had just been staring blankly at the small spread of papers on the black wooden table in front of you. You blinked a few times, startled by the sudden tug into reality, but smiled once you realized what you had been doing. You sheepishly apologized before asking her to repeat her question.

“Actually…” She said slowly while holding her knees with her hands and rocking backwards. “It’s pretty late… you seem tired. Let’s call it a night?”

“Are you sure?” You asked, stifling a yawn. You hadn’t even noticed exhaustion creeping upon you, but it seemed to swing in full force when she mentioned it. “I know this is important to you.”

“And the comfort of my guests is more important!” She stated proudly, standing up alongside her girlfriend. She held out a hand to you, which you took gratefully. You grimaced at the stiffness in your legs as you stood and placed a hand against your back as you craned your spine to crack it.

“Alright,” You sighed after Charlie urged you to get some sleep again. You waved her goodbye before her and Vaggie left the room, leaving you… and Alastor. He was getting up from the armchair just as you turned around, and you quickly tried to think of something to say, desperate for a conversation. Why was your heart beating so fast? You were going to embarrass yourself.

“You better run along, now,” Alastor said when he noticed you lingering. His voice being directed at you made goosebumps run up your arms. He had his hands folded together behind his back and he bent slightly at the waist to loom over you. “Wouldn’t want to disappoint our dear princess now, would we?”

“And you?” You asked back. You knew he didn’t really sleep, you were just hoping to make conversation. He narrowed his eyes slightly down at you.

“I’ve planned a trip to Cannibal Town,” Alastor explained with closed eyes, straightening himself to stand to his full height. He opened his eyes again to peer at you—it made you nervous to be the subject of his bright red gaze. “I have a dear friend I’ve been meaning to see.”

You nodded absently in response, Rosie’s face immediately coming to mind. You were good friends with her, and knew of the mutual connection the three of you had. You wondered briefly if you should go to her about your latest troubles. Before you could think of anything else to add to the current conversation, he bid you goodnight and briskly left the room. He seemed unnaturally hurried in his pace, but you didn’t think much of it. He had a tendency to just be a bit weird.

A breath that you didn’t even realize you were holding escaped your lungs after the large entrance doors creaked shut. You opted that yes, you were going to go talk to Rosie—tomorrow. You were growing more and more aware of just how tired you were as you stood in the silent room. Plus, maybe it would do some good to sleep on your emotions.

◈

Alastor couldn’t comprehend the mixture of emotions in him; he was mad, frustrated, but all at the same time… endeared by you. How could he feel so much disdain and hatred for someone, yet still have some feeling of care for them? He had been able to at least reach the conclusion that he did care for you, but that didn’t explain the pit in his stomach he got every time your gaze met his.

Rosie would know, surely, or at least be able to give some insight to why he was so conflicted. She was much more in-tune with emotions and mentality and all the type of stuff that Alastor had always been so quick to push away from his care. Plus, she was the only demon in Hell that he could even open a fraction of his mind to.

It was a quick trip to Cannibal Town, his legs carrying him faster than usual. He had given a suave wave and pleasant smile to the various cannibal ladies that always swooned by his presence; something that he had never really thought twice about, but now images of you and your own smile flashed in his mind’s eye when he waved. His eyes narrowed subconsciously at the experience.

The door to Rosie’s Emporium was soon being pushed open by his hand, and he lightly stepped in, hanging his coat up on a nearby rack. It didn’t take long at all for Rosie to realize she had a guest—and even faster for her to realize who the guest was.

“Alastor!” She said cheerfully. They shared a quick embrace before she beckoned him to sit with her at a table against the wall, already prepared to start talking. She knew he only showed up when he needed something.

“My, it’s been a minute,” She observed, leaning her head on her hand. It had really only been a week at most, but Alastor decided against contradicting her.

“Truly, my darling,” He simply agreed. “I have a question.”

“Well I didn’t doubt it.”

Alastor hummed, leaning back in the chair as he tried to form a coherent explanation. How was he to describe a situation he couldn’t even begin to understand himself? Rosie was ghostly silent as she waited, her pearly teeth only slightly peeking between the light smile on her lips.

“That one demon at the hotel—a mutual friend of ours—the one that's always hanging out with Charlie and–”

“I know them,” Rosie cut him off with a waving hand, urging him to get to the actual point. There was a new, sneaky curl in her grin as he spoke with a nearly undetectable stammer in his otherwise smooth voice.

“Well… for the longest time now, it’s like I feel… weird, around them. A weird feeling in my gut that I’ve never felt before. It enrages me, and I want nothing more than to just kill them and get it out of my mind, but, at the same time…” He trailed for a moment. He felt a little embarrassed, truthfully though he would never admit it, that he was practically rambling on about some random demon. He felt like a middle school boy.

Rosie’s hand had found its way to her mouth as he spoke, blocking what Alastor assumed was either a shocked open mouth or a wide smile she didn’t want to share. She inhaled sharply, composing herself, before placing her hand back onto the table.

“Well, I’ll be. I never thought I’d see the day that the Radio Demon…” She paused for a moment and pursed her lips, carefully thinking about the next few words as if what she was going to say would blow his mind into a million pieces. Alastor furrowed his brows and tilted his head to the side expectantly and confused.

“Alastor… do you have… a crush on them?”

A comical record scratch effect sounded from Alastor’s cane as his shoulders stiffened and smile tightened all at once. He looked almost offended at the idea, but at the same time there was an odd look of uncertainty in his expression.

“What? No.”

Rosie laughed aloud at the shocked and almost angry looking expression on his face, ears flattened to their fullest extent as he struggled to maintain his cheerful demeanor. His mind wasn’t exploded into a million pieces, but his whole self-perception was definitely damaged.

Alastor, although upset, thanked her for the help, excused himself, and stood quickly to leave.  He was thankful that Rosie was understanding and didn’t try to convince him to “talk it out” or anything. The only thing she said was an invitation to lunch at a local shop the next day if he wanted to talk to her more—she would be there just in case.

Truthfully, Alastor had already started suspecting the romantic feelings building inside of him before Rosie confirmed the idea; he had just refused to fully acknowledge or even begin to accept them.

He, Alastor—The Radio Demon—had no room in his soul for trivial things like romance. Even in life he had refused to pursue the experience. So why were you suddenly an exception to this? Why did you make his heart boil with a confusing mixture of love and hate; why did your presence make his chest feel heavier and why did you, of all creatures in Hell, make him nervous? Not even the strongest Overlords that had gone against him made him nervous. 

Alastor walked back to the Hotel at a snail’s pace, dreading the return and dreading the sight of you. Now that his suspicions of emotion were confirmed by Rosie herself, he wasn’t sure how his nerves would react. Would he finally snap in frustration at how you affected him and just kill you? Part of him hoped to, but another felt ill at the mere thought.

It was late when he got back, and to his luck you were evidently asleep. He paused for the briefest moment as he passed your hotel room door, eyes trailing over the knob before he caught his senses and hurried to his own quarters. 

The familiar tranquility of his personalized, swampy room with twinkling fireflies and light cricket noises helped him clear his mind as he found a cozy spot to sit and ruminate. Maybe he would go see Rosie for lunch tomorrow.

◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈

part ii

[asmolfolk]

Married! Boothill with kids.

"Oh, to be the one who married Boothill… A dream that yours truly writer would love to live. So, did you even think about it?"

────────────────────────────────────────────

Idea: Married Boothill with kids. Fandom: Honkai Star Rail. Character: Boothill. Genre: Fluffy and a tiny tiny lil' bit of angst! There's a small mention of sex too. TW? Spoilers/leaks ahead! ─────────────────────────── As you guys voted: Boothill with kids it is! Just to make sure you all know, the first part is HIM as a Husband. AFTER THAT It's him as a dad. It was really fun doing this as this was something that I thought about with him with my Yume <3 Also: If you take inspiration or use this as a reference, please TAG ME!! I RLLY WANT TO SEE! I will do way more Boothill too! So stay tunned, the next one will be: "One last time." A short-fic~

────────────────────────────────────────────

When you were about to proclaim your title as "HIS PARTNER", you could see the way that his eyes shined as he looked at you. For once, it was certain: This man was IN LOVE with you. The way he seemed to be completely lost in your eyes as you talked to him, The way he would hold your hands… For the first time in forever, you saw him so vulnerable. And, then, when you two looked at each other and finally kissed. It wasn’t a kiss like the many others you two would share, it was… Sweet, it was gentle and held on a flame that you could never think that someone could feel.

As the day would pass by... You were sure you married the right man, he's eyes showed nothing but devotion, love and everything else you could EVER imagine to have someone looking you as. He literally seemed to be falling in love with you a hundred times PER second.

You saw how... Sad he looked as he would see the family of your friends, but then... It was just one look at you and you could almost read exactly what he was thinking: "I also DO have a family now."

But, enough with that! Let’s talk about how he IS as a Married man.

────────────────────────────────────────────

At first, you didn’t notice it but he would look at you for longer, his eyes were always checking on you - as If he was scared to see you disappear if his eyes were somewhere else. Every Time you talked, he would immediately look at you with those big heart eyes. [I swear! Instead of a gun point, it looks like this:] (Also, just wanted to point out that he canonically blushes - the shy expression - even at his nose.)

(I edited those images!! - The little hearts and the blushing)

I SWEAR! He looks so blushy and shy, but don't be tricked by that fool expression! He is going to say some really romantical stuff out of nowhere, always trying to make you blush just like him. Not only that, but Boothill also seems to LOVE messing with you... But can't quite handle you making this back, at least, not in the beginning.

"Doll, aren't ya' the prettiest being in the universe? I could swear ya' were one of those goddess of beauty that the red haired knight would tal' about." - He would smile as he hold your hand, bringing it closer to his lips - "I could jus' survive by looking at you." His words were always so sweet and full of love, he could NEVER say something bad about you - Also because of his beacon. He would always try to make you feel loved by his words, even more after being married to you.

────────────────────────────────────────────

 As your husband, he would always be close to you. Normally, he loves to make you feel his face… It’s the only place he can feel it too. So, he loves EVERYTHING that could work with that.  He would let his head resting on your lap, chest, belly, shoulder - ANYTHING. His head slowly turned into something that he communicates BEAUTIFULLY with you about.  Sometimes, you compare him to an animal - More specifically a dog or a fox - because they would usually rub their head against their owners or to receive more attention.  Even so, it was nice. Even if he was a bit heavy, those moments could be cherished as really important.

It was close to noon, still… Boothill was laying his head against your chest not even moving a finger while he recharged and kept his eyes closed. You were sleeping, he knew you were tired and he didn’t let you do anything else before you could receive a good sleep for some minutes. He swore to wake you up before it was too late for your compromise. When it hitted the exact hour you asked him to wake you up, he immediately started to try to wake you. He didn’t even think about letting you sleep, if you INSISTED on going: It was important and he TRULY didn’t want to ruin anything you were on. “Doll? Partner! Spouse.” - When you finally woke up or stopped asking for more minutes, he would hold you even closer - “It’s time for you to do your stuff.” When he did that, he knew it was only a favor but he always loved when you gave him a kiss or a praise for waking you in time. They were more than just happy to help you out. As he received his reward for waking you up, he would help around anything you needed as you did your own thing.

────────────────────────────────────────────

He would show you off... But not in THAT strange way, no. He would proudly show everyone EVERYTHING you did - with your consent. You are an artist? Well, pal, seems like Pom Pom and the WHOOOLE Astral express LOVES your art, even the unimpressed trailblazer. [They asked you to make... A drawing of them and a trashcan falling in love?-]  You make outfits? Seems like Argenti and others fashion and beauty freaks are making lots and lots of commissions.  You BAKE?! Well, sweetie. For the first time, you saw lots of Galaxy Rangers at your door, asking for your prices and sweets.  You KNOW that this was ALL him. But, even though you could think that he was trying to help you out - He would confess that he just couldn't stop talking about you to them.  He is the sweetest cyborg hubby.

“My husband…” - You didn’t even need to call for him again, he stopped cleaning his guns and immediately came to you - “Could you perhaps explain to me why a lot of people started calling me and following me on social media?” “Oh… About that, darlin’… I may or may not talk about your skills at the bar…” - You couldn’t even get mad. He was at a BAR and the only thing he did was talk about you and drink, it was… Strangely nice, you felt a little tingle' in your heart as you heard him talk about what he said. You couldn’t even handle a laugh while you told him that it was okay.

────────────────────────────────────────────

As your husband, you should’ve known that he would do anything AND everything to just see you smile. He was already like this… But you DID NOT expect how far he would go. If he saw you sad, he would sit down and ask you about everything. He believes in trust and that THINGS can be solved talking [with words or guns] and he WOULD NEVER try to buy your happiness.  Not only that, he knows how to make you feel better. He made sure to remember every forking time you were feeling bad and he helped you… He always made sure to remember: What worked, what didn’t work, what helped a bit and what you HATED.

”Darlin’, you can’t be in your room forever.” - He heard a low (Watch me) from you and he chuckled - “I know ya’ are upset, but, lemme tell ya’ something darlin’... I just bought the whole Phantom of the Opera Musical and the Movie to watch with you and sing too… But I guess our musical karaoke can wait”  The moment you came out of the room, you were met with Boothill wearing the Phantom’s mask. “Now, come, my Angel of Music… Let’s start that thing.”

Just a bonus: I’m OBSESSIVE over Musicals. I love them so much!! And I think that Boothill would love them too, at first: He would say that he doesn’t like them that much: The only ones he saw were really poorly made.  But when you showed them your FAVS? THEY WERE IN LOVE! He started to sing along with you, loving the way you would always pick the best couples to interpret as.  The first musical he loved was The Addam’s Family: He was the Gomez of your Mortícia. You two would sing along so sweetly that you thought about submitting to be them.  Also: Never show Dear Evan Hansen to him, he will NOT stop trying to cry for a MONTH or WORSE. (Or do show.)

────────────────────────────────────────────

 As your husband… Oh, dear. His kisses were the BEST!! He CAN’T go one day without kissing you at least three times in a day. He loves feeling your lips, he loves taking your breath out and letting you feel all hot and bothered. Knowing that - even with that metal body - can make you blush and shy away or giggle or just look at him full of love was enough for him.

 “Please… Again.” - He would ask and, as always, you would indulge. You kissed him, he would hold you so close that you thought he was trying to merge with you - “Ya’ are so… Amazing.” - He said, with a big smile while backing away for one second - “I could lose myself… In those big ol’ eyes of ya’” “Then, why don’t you?” “I want to still be able to live with ya’, to feel you… Not only to observe but to be present. If I were to lose myself on ya’ every time, where would I have the time to show ya’ my whole forking affection?”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As your husband… He would never let you without aftercare. He would clean you up and let you relax as he does all the work, he is never tired, not after the modifications… So he doesn’t really need a rest. When he came across you, he finally noticed how cute you were. Letting you rest and caressing your head, he would pick you up to the bath… He would take care of you just like you always did with him.

”Are ya’ okay, darlin’? Want something?” - He asked as he massaged your back while you relaxed at the bath - “Food, water… Anything?” “Hmmm… Juss… Keep this up.” - You would answer, almost sleeping. His massage skills have improved a lot since the first time he did it, it was incredible - “I’m so… Tired, I just want to sleep.” “Hah… Aren’t ya a sleepy one? Well, I can do that for you.” - Again, he would take care of you… Even if it means learning new skills, learning how to hold you while drying you with a towel, learning how to help you put on your clothes or to just lead you to the bedroom. Learning how to look at your face and control himself to not kiss you: You were tired, he should NOT make any move to start something more right now. Learning how to hug you, learning how to let his head rest on your shoulder… Learning how it feels to hear your heart, learning how good it is to sleep hearing it.

────────────────────────────────────────────

As your Husband, you can always expect good things from him… But there was one thing you never expected. When he told you about his family. [Spoilers/Leaks ahead!!]  He was always so… Cheerful and silly while with you, you never DID expect to be meeted with such a cruel and terrifying backstory.  The way he told you about his family… About that little girl that he took care of, about his daughter. How she died… How he lost EVERYONE in one day. One day was enough.  He explained that… He truly felt like you could disappear if he didn’t try to make things right, if he didn’t protect you enough.

 When he stopped for a second, looked at his hands… You didn’t expect the words that followed: “I… Never thought I would find a family again or someone to care about me. Not in this condition, I…’m so forking grateful to have meeted ya’. Not one freaking day I passed without loving you even more.”

 “Darlin’, ya saw my bad sides… You saw how disgusting I look… And even so, ya still keep around… I don’t know why, I don’t even want to know why you stayed… In my head, it doesn’t matter why… I love you.”

“Sorry for that big talk, but ya know how I am sometimes;”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As your husband and future Father, he would try to see if he could get you pregnant… If not, he would suggest adopting and then, you hitted him with an idea… That he loved: “What if we adopted kids from destroyed planets by the Ipc? Kids that live in shelters.” He knew, YOU were the one for him FOR SURE!

“Dove, you are a genius!” He would say, holding you and twirling you around - “I knew it! I knew it!... I knew that you were always the right one.”

────────────────────────────────────────────

PAPA BOOTHILL!

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father, Boothill would probably adopt as many as he could. So I won’t tell you numbers exactly… But he would have a lot, he would be a total girl’s dad. Sweets, you could EVEN SEE: Boothill having their make-up done by the girls, playing with dolls with them, letting them play with his hair and the list goes on and on. You knew he would be a good dad and he exceeds your expectations. He would be so gentle and calm with the kids that many would think that he is another person: But you knew more than them. You would see him always playing, always making them laugh… And, of course: You would always be involved. It was NEVER always: “Just Dad and the Girls”, you were close. In any activity that you could participate in, the kids and Boothill were more than happy to have you around. The kids, some in 4~5, others newborns… Others almost or are teenagers, would be so happy playing and just studying with their papa.

”PAPA! MOMMA! LOOK!” - One of the oldest showed you their report card, they were an +A student - “I’m so so happy!! Are y’all proud of me?!” It was in a second, Boothill was holding the teenager - That he named Aponi - while screaming of happiness. “THAT’S MA GIRL! YOU SHOWED THAT FORKING PAPER WHO IS THE BOSS!” - He would cheer up with you. “We are so proud, Apo! You studied so much… You deserve a break… How about your favorite place for tonight? I know you wanted to go there.” “R-Really?! We can go!?” “Why, of course! You know that we just want your happiness more than anything… And, if that place makes you happy: It makes us happy too. Thank you for your hard work, Aponi… You did soo great!” “Yeah, gal, you deserve every compliment! But just so y’know… If you want something else, just ask me and I’ll buy it for ya.”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father: He pampers his kids a lot… You could ask him to stop, but he wouldn’t. He has the money, the resources EVERYTHING to make this worth it… So he wants to, he wants - more than anything - to make this right.  He couldn’t pamper his daughter properly and he CAN’T handle the thought that he may not be able to pamper any of his kids. He NEEDS to pamper, he feels like an obligation.  Sometimes, you need to step up and try to put limitations on what he’s doing. He still needs to understand somestuff.

”Dear, you know that Kiona is only 5 months old, right? What’s she going to do with 8 pokemon’s plushies and those pokemon cards?”  “She likes watching it… So I bought it so when she grows up, she will still have those.”

...

“Dear… I told you not to buy more of those for Nashoba. He needs to take better care of his teeths and the doctor told us to control the candies.”  “I know, I know… But it was only one…” ... “Dear… Are you giving your credit card to a 12 year old?”  “WHAT- Nooo… She just wanted to buy things for herself like a big girl, but I’m going to be right at her side!”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father: He wouldn’t scream at his kids… NEVER. He would never even raise a hand, he would always talk and make sure that they KNOW that this IS a safe place. If you do something wrong, he is going to take care of it… YOU all are going to take care of it together.  Even when his kid came across with a sad face while asking for forgiveness when they didn’t pass with all A+ and they started crying because they were scared that they would be sent alway… Boothill was hella mad but, right in front of his child, he would calm them, saying that they did their best and he would boost them up.  Telling them that their grades were awesome and that they were so intelligent. Boothill would concentrate on what he KNOWS his kids like and praise them for it…  As for the situation mentioned while you take care of the other children… He would have “a talk” with the kids' old parents.

”Booth-... Oh, I see.” You saw him, without any blood, but by his expression: You knew he killed them - “Are you okay?” “I’m better now… I discovered the whole scheme about those muddle-fudgers… They got what they deserved.”  “I’m proud of you.” - You said, holding his hand and letting his head fall into your chest - “Thank you for protecting our children…”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father, you knew that Boothill would do anything for your kids. It didn’t matter if they were adoptive or biological, he would treat them the EXACT same. Of course, he would spend a lil’ bit more time with those who want to follow his path… But, he would never let the others feel jealous about that.  Not only this but he would also show the kids some skills he has. He would sing them songs, give them musical instruments if they are interested in… They would form a lil’ band together and you would be their singer.  The kids were in love with that idea, even the ones who weren’t interested in music would participate: Dancing, making drawings, outfits and etc etc etc.

”Ohhh! Those are so cute!” - Said March 7 looking at your kids drawings - “Your kids are so talented!”  The Astral Express became one of your kids favorite spots, even so that some of them want to become one.  The sweet look on Welt's face when one of them told him that they wanted to become just like him.  The look on Himeko’s face when one of the kids revealed that they didn’t like coffee until they tried hers.  The look on March's face when the lil’ girl called for her, saying that she loved March and that she would always appreciate the photos they took together.  The look on Dan Heng’s face when the quiet kid told him that they would love to be like him and take care of the databank.  The look on the Trailblazer’s face when one the kids helped them to search for trash cans and even complimented the trash cans with them.  The look on PomPom’s face when one the youngest said their name.  Oh, the Astral Express LOVES your kids. They let them enter ANY time and would love to babysit them.

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father, you knew that Boothill made them love you even more, you knew that by the way the kids asked about you guys' love life once they grew up. The more romantical ones would dream loudly about how they would wish to have a romance like that - making Papa Boothill notice how fast your kids were growing.  And, when you asked about who they wanted to be with… The answers came fastly. It was a big difference between other relationships, they were open with you two. They - YES - would tell if they were uncomfortable talking about something, but, even so… The ones who weren’t would tell you guys everything.

”I met this really cute boy at Xianzhou! He was soo cute!” - One of your kids said - “I thought to myself: They are so skilled and such a cute lil’ fellow.”  “Sis, you are younger than him.”  “Lemme praise him for a second!!”

────────────────────────────────────────────

As a father, he was more than happy to have a family. He would be happy with just you… But with all of them, they remind him so much of his first daughter… Of his siblings. He, to himself, would wish that they could see him right now… And be sure:

”It took a while for me… But, now… I have a family again. My two families will always be together in my heart.”

────────────────────────────────────────────

So, we reached the end! Hope you guys enjoyed it and that this made your day a bit brighter. As someone who sees Boothill as a comfort character, having people interested on my writting for him is such a nice touch. I can only thank you guys for your support and for reading until here. Thank you. If anyone wishes to be in the taglist for upcomming Boothill's oneshots, headcanons and imagines - Please tell me! And for those who wanted Angst, maybe I'll do the angst one someday <3

────────────────────────────────────────────

Taglist: @spaeko, @4onlyyouruse.

[ladykailitha]

Paper Hearts Part 2

I'm loving the response for this. Thank you so much!!!

In this we have a couple of cameos, Steve gets into some trouble and Eddie comes to his rescue.

Pt 1

****

Steve checked with the nurse on Monday, more as a precaution then because his hand was feeling worse. Because Eddie was right. If he didn’t take care of himself no else would.

She signed off on the hand and said that it was doing better, but to still take it easy for a couple more days.

He tried to focus in class, but he was buzzing out of his skin with barely contained excitement.

Finally it was time for lunch and he ducked into library. He pulled out the year book and began jotting down a few names. He decided to stick to just seniors as that would prevent people thinking he was being a creep and of course the add bonus of avoiding a certain Junior’s ire.

Once he got about twenty names compiled he took the list up to the girls manning the paper hearts booth.

“Hey,” he greeted warmly.

“How can I help you?” the blonde haired girl asked.

“These can be anonymous right?” Steve asked chewing on his bottom lip.

The other girl, a cute bubbly red-head in a cheerleader’s uniform smiled up at him. “Sure! Is there a certain lady you would like to buy a red heart for?”

He shook his head. “Um...no. Can I get twenty pink hearts please?”

The two girls shared a shocked glance.

“How many?” the blonde asked.

“Twenty.” Steve pulled out his wallet and handed them two ten dollar bills.

The stunned blonde took the money as the red-head counted out the twenty pink hearts.

“There you go!” she said cheerfully. “Thank you for your donation!”

“I just have one question,” Steve asked. “Why are a couple of juniors manning the booth for senior prom?”

The girls’ jaws dropped in surprise that he recognized them as juniors.

The blonde managed to overcome her shock first. “They were asking for volunteers. We get extra credit.”

Steve nodded. “Thanks, ladies!”

He turned around and nearly collided with Munson.

“Oof!” he cried. “Sorry!”

Munson eyed him warily. “Why so many pink hearts, Harrington?” He crossed his arms and licked his bottom lip slowly.

Steve looked back at the two girls and then back at him. “I don’t have a girlfriend this year and but still have all this money, so I thought that instead of blowing it on junk food and soda to be all sad that night, I do something nice with the money.”

Eddie cocked his head to the side and considered him a moment. “And what would that be?”

Steve blushed and looked down at the paper hearts in his hands. He mumbled something Eddie couldn’t quite catch.

“Say that again?”

“I said I was going to write something nice for the girls not likely to get one,” he hissed, this time loud enough for the other boy to hear, but no one else.

Eddie blinked at him a moment. “Oh. That’s actually really sweet of you.”

Steve’s blush deepened and promptly turned on his heel and dashed away.

The red-head asked, “What was all that about?”

Eddie looked over at Chrissy Cunningham, the girl he had no doubt would be queen of Hawkins high next year with her perfect boyfriend, her bubbly personality, and cheerful nature.

He debated telling her what Steve’s plan was, but he didn’t want to ruin it for the guy.

“I honestly don’t know.”

Which to be fair was true. He didn’t know what that was about. How former king of Hawkins could be so sweet? Because hooboy did that throw a wrench in Eddie’s plans to never ever give into his crush on the guy. If Steve wasn’t the bitchy, annoying jock anymore than that last bastion of defense was going to fall and he would be like every other girl with a pair of eyes at this school.

In love with Steve Harrington.

He opened his wallet and counted how much money he had. He rationed gas and other expenses before he nodded to himself.

He walked over to the booth and asked for a single red heart.

“Ooh...” the blonde girl cooed. “Who’s the lucky lady?”

Eddie noticed her for the first as he handed her the money. It was Robin Buckley from band. Eddie had tried it out for a semester hoping to get enough credits to graduate last year. It didn’t work. But he recognized a fellow queer when he saw one.

“Maybe I’m sending it to myself?” he teased.

Chrissy giggled into her hand. “That’s what I would do if I didn’t have a boyfriend.”

Robin blushed a dark pink.

“You’d never have to worry about that,” Eddie said.

She handed him the heart and he thanked her before heading on his way.

****

Steve suddenly felt self-conscious after telling Munson what he was going to to. But he resolved to go through with his plan.

That night he painstakingly wrote each girl’s name and something nice he remembered about them. Once he was finished he used a paper clip to keep them together and put it between the pages of his English workbook for safety.

He finished his homework. Or at least he tried to. After about an hour, the words on the pages started to blur.

It didn’t help that it was chemistry and that just made his head spin. He would have called Dustin, but the kid would have just done it for him after five minutes of trying to explain it to him.

He decided it was time for a break.

Steve stood up and stretched. Below him he could hear the hum of the TV in his father’s den and the prattling of his mother on the phone. He wasn’t sure how they managed it in a house as big as theirs but they always made sure Steve was aware they were home.

He always thought it was a weird control thing they had. They were always gone on trips but when they were home they made sure he knew it.

He changed into a pair of sweats, grabbed a jacket and pulled on his Nikes, having decided that a run would be the perfect thing to wake him up so that he could finish his homework. He stood by the front doors and stretched out his legs, making sure they were warmed up enough.

Steve was finishing the last of his stretches when his mother came out the kitchen.

“And where do you think you’re going, young man?” she hissed.

He looked at her in confusion. He had one leg bent all the way back so that his foot was nearly touching his ass. He was managing his balance by using his free hand to touch the door frame.

“Going for a run?” he said, making the statement more of a question.

“At this time of night?” Mrs. Harrington said sharply.

Steve looked at his watch and then back up at her, again in confusion. It was only a little after five o’clock in the evening.

“I wanted to get it before it too dark to,” he explained.

She looked at her watch and then huffed, storming back into the kitchen.

That was the problem with his mother. You could never tell when she was just going to let it go or fly off the handle.

Steve let out a shuddering breath and then opened the door. He closed it behind him and sighed.

He should have told her he was going for a run, but even with them making noise, he had forgotten that he was supposed to tell them where he was going. Having gotten too used to them not being home.

He let out a shiver as he shook his arms to warm them up. If he had been doing anything other than running he would have worn a warmer coat, but while he was cold now, he sure as hell wasn’t going to be in five minutes.

Steve took off running. Just sprinting down the street to get away from his parents, his responsibilities, his troubles, and his cares. He got to the end of the street and slowed his sprint into a marathon. Going for endurance over speed.

He wasn’t sure how long he ran only that when he stopped for breath he was standing in front of a large sign that read: Forest Hills Trailer Park. He squinted up at it like he was seeing things.

Despite what the haves in Loch Nora thought, the trailer park was a lot closer than they wanted it to be. It was literally on the other side of the forest behind his house. But as he hadn’t taken off through the forest, he was a little surprised to be standing there, hands on his hips and panting for breath.

If he was going to mindlessly go somewhere he thought for sure he would have ended up at the Hendersons.

But, nope.

Steve ran his fingers through his hair. How was he supposed to get home now? He squinted down at his watch trying to make out the time, but full dark had taken a hold on this god forsaken town and he couldn’t make out shit.

He wasn’t even sure he could find the entrance to the forest that would lead him back home. Not that he wanted to go through that part of the woods this late at night. The Department of Energy’s assurances be damned.

“Fuck!”

He heard the vehicle before he saw the headlights. He stepped out of the way and hoped that whoever it was would be willing to give him a lift home.

“Fuck!” he cursed again.

Because it was Munson. Of course it was. This day was really out to get him.

“Harrington!” Munson called out, slowing to stop next to him. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Steve buried his head in his hands. He had to take a chance with Munson because he didn’t know if there would even be someone else coming in anytime in the near future.

“Would you believe me if I told you I got lost?” he asked, hands back on his hips.

Munson laughed and threw open his passenger side door. “Get in, dumbass. I have to stop at my place to let my uncle know I’m taking you home.”

Steve nodded and walked in front of the van. Mainly because that’s where the lights where, but also because he didn’t want Munson to drive off without him. If he tried that, he’d have to run Steve over. Which at this point would have been an improvement.

He hopped into the van and closed the door. “Thanks. I’m serious about the getting lost thing though.” He buckled in.

Munson gunned it and then gave him the side eye. “Yeah, how does that work for a Hawkins native?”

“Because I’m not?” Steve said. “I moved here when I was eight. I’m no more a native than you are, man.”

Munson slammed on the breaks, Steve’s hand shooting out in front of him. “Wait, you’re really not a Hawkins native?”

He shook his head. “I swear it.”

Munson started going down the road again. “So you managed to get lost?”

“Yeah, I sometimes run to get out of my head,” he explained. “I somehow I ended up here.” He looked at the road out in front of him. “My parents are probably going to kick my ass when I get home. I left before dinner and there is no way it’s not way passed that now.”

Munson pressed a button on his watch and it lit up. “Yeah, man. It’s almost seven.”

Suddenly every muscle in Steve’s body started screaming in protest.

“Shit,” he muttered and he buried his head in his hands. “I’ve been running for about two hours.”

Munson slammed on his breaks again. “The fuck, Harrington!”

“I know!” Steve cried. “I barely warmed up and I didn’t have any water with me. But I didn’t mean to run that long. I thought I was just going to go around the block a couple of times and then go in for dinner.”

“We’re getting you water and food before I send you home, man,” Munson mutter. “And I don’t want to hear a god damn complaint from you. Do you understand? Even I’m not stupid enough to go for two hours without stopping for breaks and drinking water.”

Steve just nodded. He had already gotten yelled at by Munson about not taking care of himself, he wasn’t about to endure another lecture.

****

Tag List:

1- @mira-jadeamethyst @rozzieroos @itsall-taken @redfreckledwolf @emly03

2- @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie

3- @chaosgremlinmunson @messrs-weasley @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @danili666

4- @goodolefashionedloverboi @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @carlyv @wonderland-girl143-blog

5- @justforthedead89 @vecnuthy @irregular-child @bookbinderbitch @bookworm0690

6- @anne-bennett-cosplayer @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @littlewildflowerkitten @genderless-spoon

7- @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @dragonmama76 @scheodingers-muppet @ellietheasexylibrarian @thedragonsaunt

8- @useless-nb-bisexual @disrespectedgoatman @counting-dollars-counting-stars @tinyplanet95 @swimmingbirdrunningrock

9- @croatoan-like-its-hot @lolawonsstuff @moonshadows-13

[nar-nia]

♡ enhypen and things their s/o does to annoy them ♡

//slightly suggestive in some parts. please enjoy 🤭

heeseung - weird petnames

it started as a dumb joke at first

he was saying something and you grinned, replying with a "yes daddy"

AND THE LOOK ON HIS FACE

you never saw him this disgusted

so your plan was clear: use the nickname the entire night

maybe he wouldn't have minded so much if his friends weren't around while you did it... oh well 🤭

he didn't even know your voice could get so whiny

would have dragged you away right then if his friends didn't already have the most annoying grins on their faces

after a while he finally has enough since you just won't stop

so he decides to just play along with it

he goes all in: a hand on your thigh, a "thank you baby" whispered in your ear

he never saw you shutting up this quickly

and the blush on your face?

it was definitely worth it

jay - babying him

this man is so used to babying you

so when you suddenly baby him in return he doesn't know how to react

this just feels wrong to him

he decides to ignore it - maybe it was just an accident

but you just keep doing it, calling him baby and talking in your cute voice

and you're doing it in front of his friends too

so he gets fed UP

he tries being calm at first, he really does

calling you baby too, trying to put you back in your place

but you just won't stop

so finally he's had enough

as soon as you start babying him again he has you on his lap, your arms wrapped around your body to keep you in place

jay's holding onto you, head resting on yours to show you who's the baby

not that you mind though - cuddles are exactly what you wanted all along

jake - not letting him spoil you

jake loves spoiling people. especially you

and normally you don't complain, but you also don't want him to go broke for you

so this time you decided to not comply

"i can buy it myself, don't worry" "why would you do that?"

jake is genuinely confused, silence spreading around the store

he keeps trying it a few times after but you always refuse, telling him you can just buy it yourself

so the case is clear to him

you must not love him anymore

once that thought has come up he gets so pouty

on the one hand you find it funny that he gets sulky over something as simple as this

but on the other hand... he looks genuinely upset and insecure and you feel bad

so you decide to cheer him up and offer to buy him something

but that leaves jake conflicted

because yay, he gets spoiled by his favorite person, but also it should be him spoiling you

he does not know how to react

you eventually give in and let him buy you stuff

and he gets so happy and excited again

you just decide to spoil him with kisses in return

and the promise to never ever do that again

sunghoon - lots of aegyo

he doesn't even know how this started

he just wanted to go on a little weekend trip with you and the guys

but as soon as your plane landed you grabbed his arm, begging to do some sightseeing

but he was tired

instead of accepting his no though you decided you had to convince him

and to sunghoons horror it had to be with aegyo

you went all in: whiny baby voice, big eyes, finger hearts

he was mortified

even worse since you did this in public and in front of his friends

but oh. oh no. this wasn't even the worst part

you weren't the only one that wanted to do some sightseeing

and before sunghoon could react he was surrounded by you, sunoo and jungwon going all out with the aegyo

he just wanted to nap

but he knew this wouldn't stop unless he agreed

so he gives in, agreeing to go sightseeing straight away

best believe that you have to make it up to him after the trip though

sunoo - not babying him

sunoo is the opposite of jay

he is so used to you babying him and taking care of him that everything else feels wrong at this point

it's small things, like how you always buy a pack of mint choco ice cream every time you're shopping together

or how you always hold his hand and drag him around

so why were you not holding his hand right now?

you didn't even really cuddle him when you said hello

but even worse, passed right by the mint choco ice cream??

he is devastated

somehow he manages to make sure that you pass the ice cream section multiple times

he just keeps sighing and throwing glances at his favorite

but you dare to ignore him?? wow

he has the biggest pout on his face

and that won't disappear until you get back home and you drag him to the freezer

revealing multiple mint choco ice creams

sunoo can't help but smile - but he still requires multiple hours of cuddling and lots of kisses to make up for how you treated him today

and his ice cream of course

jungwon - spending too much time with jay

okay listen

jungwon loves you

he loves sharing everything with you

but not jay

those two are soulmates and nothing can come in between them - not even you

so when you suddenly start spending time with jay and not him??

no

he's not even jealous because he wants to spend more time with you

it's simply because he is not willing to let you be best friends with jay

he was there first

and now you two are doing things without him??

you can almost feel his glare whenever you're out

and as soon as you're home and try to talk about your day he just continues glaring at you

he's a bigger gatekeeper than most kpop stans

days like this usually end with you begging for forgiveness until he starts smiling again

you both know it will happen again but jungwon forgives you every time

especially if you promise that it will be the three of you next time

niki - babying him pt. 2

so we all know how he turns ducky plushies into pumas, right?

you had to listen to so many rants about this

he should have known not to trust you with this information

"how's my little ducky today?"

oh the GLARE you are getting as soon as he comes through the door

"what did you call me?"

"my cute little ducky. my ducky wucky. are you in a bad mood?"

oh he is.

"i'm not a duck."

you're just giggling, ignoring how annoyed he is

"ah, i forgot. puma, right?"

he just nods, still wary

"i'm so sorry. did i make my cutesy kitten angry?"

and oh you did

he looks genuinely mad

until you see a spark in his eyes

he knows you're not actually trying to make him angry

it's a sign of love or something

within seconds he has you trapped on the couch, aggressively pinching your cheeks

and wow - you didn't know this man knew so many stupid pet names

he's returning your energy, just 100 times stronger

in the end you're both just giggling and laughing in each other's arms

"i'm still a puma though. i'm cool."

"sure, little ducky."

co-written by the amazing and lovely @ateez-main-yapper ! yes, this started over a discussion about men calling themselves daddy. we do not support this behavior.

if you read it this far please don't hesitate to reblog or send me an ask with your feedback 🩷 i am always happy and excited to hear your opinions. this is also the first time i tried writing in this style so please let me know what you think, that would be very appreciated.

permanent taglist: @suneonu @soobin-chois @sjyuniverse @taekbokki

[stinmybubs]

"I Want you Pt.2" NSFW

AN: Hi hi!! Thank you all so so much for the love on my last post, this one was planned out a tiny bit more but tbh I just want to skip to the sex at one point sooo Teehee. (I also decided to spell his name with the gou lol.)

18+!! Please Minors DNI! Please and thank you! I’m not too good at drawing sex scenes tbh! So I hope this’ll be okay I’ll practice more!

AFAB! Reader x Bakugou Katsuki

Warnings!!: Degrading!! LONGER THAN PT.1

Pt. 1 here!

Bakugou was livid. Not only was every other boy in the class able to get a peek at your ass, but you keep purposely putting yourself out there for everyone to see. Of course he didn’t want anyone to look at what he wanted. What was his. But of course, you weren’t his yet though.

Bakugou found the best way to punish you, to tease back. Maybe leave some soft touches on your body here and there, getting you to want him, crave him, and only think of him.

So, as the time passed in the gym he plotted how he was going to go about this without being caught by everyone else. But seems fate had something in store for the two of you, because you could have perfect timing.

“Fuck I need more water…” you groaned, begging for time to go faster. As you grabbed your water bottle your good friend Uraraka waved to you, quickly walking over to you with her beautiful smile on her face.

“Where ya goin? We have like 20 more minutes.” The wide eyed girl asked, curiously looking at you.

“Well, I need more water if I’m gonna survive anymore of this…or I’ll pass the fuck out.” You say, wiping your forehead with your towel as the girl chatted it up with you before letting you go refill your water.

As you make your way out the hall and to the water fountain, you can’t help but think about how sexy Bakugou looked working out. His skin glistening perfectly on his muscles, oh and the way his pecs just looked so perfect, the way he would lift up his shirt from time to time to reveal his abs. Oh god. He was so hot.

You thought about how his rough hands would feel on your body. How’s he would grab you by the waist, he honestly could easily pick you up without and issue. You gulp as you put the water bottle underneath the faucet of the water fountain. Not realizing how you were rubbing your thighs together and your breathing became uneven.

“Whatcha’ thinkin’ of? Hm?”

The voice made your heart sink. Feeling a sudden weight behind you, his hands grabbing the water fountain to trap you in front of him.

“N-nothing… I’m just thinking how long the workout out is!” You pant, your heart racing as he pressed against your back.

“Really? That’s all? Cuz yer sure was showin off a ton back there..” he leaned in to your ear, the feeling of his breath on your neck and ears made you shudder.

“I-…I don’t know what you mean Bakugou.” You try your best to keep yourself together. Oh how you wanted to just melt underneath him and let him take you right then and there.

“Hm…you think I don’t notice? Yer’ little stares? Ya’ pathetic attempts at teasing me?” He puts the thin skin of the tip of your ear between his teeth, nibbling it slightly. You let out a small whimper, omg. It’s finally happening! You shut your eyes prepared anticipating his next move.

Nothing. As hot as his pressure was, you didn’t realize he was gone. What the fuck? Was I imagining or was that real? Am I going crazy over this man? You panic internally realizing how hot your body was. Fuck, i gotta go home. With that you did not care if you all had 20 minutes left on the clock, you were all hot and bothered and needed some relief.

“Fuck…” you quickly fidget with your keys, trying to get your room door open. “Why isn’t it working?” You hiss, taking the keys out to examen them. Wrong key. You accidentally grabbed the nearest key next to your water bottle instead of your own. The worst part is. It was Bakugou’s keys.

“Oh my god, you got to be kidding me…” your heart began to race, thinking of your last interaction with the guy.

“Oi. You got something that’s mine.” The familiar voice seen shivers up your spine, your heart dropping as you turned around to look at the blonde. “Haha…seems I do” you awkwardly laugh, watching him walk over to you, he had a towel wrapped around his neck with one hand holding one side and behold his other hand. A key.

“And I’m guessing that’s my key?” You point to the key in his hand. He nods, a small smirk entering I face. Oh how handsome he was up close. You couldn’t help but stare at his face, it’s like you were entranced for a moment, watching a bead of sweat drip down his face and off his chin. Oh how you saw his grin grow wider.

“Quite ya’ starin.” He uses his free hand that was once holding his towel to flick your forehead.

“Ow, sorry! Sorry…may I have my key back?” You looked back him, making eye contact for a split second before he made a ‘hm’ noise. His body shifted closer to you, pressing your back against your dorm door. The dangled the key over your head as he leaned one arm against the door.

“Come earn ya’ keys back pretty.” He once again flicked your forehead, grabbing his own keys out your loose hands and walked away.

You were freaking I out. What did he mean? Why did he do that? What the FUCK is going on? So many question filled your flustered head. Omg, omg omg, omg!! Your face burning red.

Katsuki waited patiently in his room, leaning against his own bed, staring at the keys he had in front of him. You were taking fucking forever, all that teasing and no guts to back it up made him snicker.

Knock knock

Finally. Opening the door to see you standing there, your face all flushed red. Cute. He thought, letting you into his dorm, grabbing your keys and throwing them somewhere.

“What took ya’ so long? Fucking thought you pussied out of wanting me.” He grabbed your face, making you look into his eyes. “I uh…was nervous?” You questioningly stated. Your heart racing. His room smelt so good.

"So uh...how do I earn my keys back Bakugou?" You nervously asked as he let your face go, blushing at how big his hands were. The boy hadn't answered you yet, but oh you got your answer when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you close to him.

"B...Bakugou? Why-" you were cut off by Bakugou pressing his lips onto yours, moving the hand that was on your wrist to your waste to pull your body closer to him and the other pressing your head deeper into the kiss.

You were in shock, your eyes wide making eye contact with katsuki. Soon you melted into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck. Fuck. You never knew kissing could feel so good, it got hot so fast it felt like the room was on fire. Your kiss with bakugou soon became sloppy as he effortlessly picked you up by the waist, your legs immediately wrapping around his waist as he moved you over to his bed.

Katsuki released himself from the kiss, you let out a small whine because the kiss felt so fucking good you never wanted it to stop. questingly looking up at him, you noticed that devilish smirk on his face. "Wha-AT" You squealed as he tossed you onto his bed.

"What the fuck Bakugou!?" You shout, super confused on what's going on. Trying to sit up you feel your legs being grabbed and pried open by his hands. "W-Wait!" You shout, trying to stop him from removing your shorts.

"I-...I haven't showered yet I might stink." You shyly try to close your legs back up but he was just too strong, keeping them open. "I don't care. And stop calling me Bakugou...ya' know what we're about to do and ya' still keep saying the wrong name. It's Katsuki." He gently slapped your hand away from you trying to remove his hands.

You gulp, completely surrendering yourself to his will, watching as he slowly removed your shorts. you could already feel how wet you were through your own panties and were extremely embarrassed because you knew he was gonna tease you about this.

"Wow...this we for me? Or was it when ya' decided to give the whole class a show hm..? " The feeling of of one of his fingers pressing against your soaked panties, at this point the panties didn't even matter, you felt how he rubbed his fingers against you fold causing you to let out a small moan.

Katsuki couldn't wait any longer, all the teasing and the thoughts he had of you all building up to this moment. Fuck you looked so hot laying on his bed, face all flushed and completely surrendered to him.

Katsuki removed you panties effortlessly, tossing them aside not caring where they landed, fuck. This is really happening. You felt Katsuki’s fingers slowly slip into you, your slick already making wet noises which made you really embarrassed.

Katsuki watched you, he watched as your body convulsed and your face contort as his fingers moved in and out of your pussy.

“K-…Katsu please.” You look at him with pleading eyes, his fingers felt so good, but of course you wanted more. And you knew he wanted more too. “Ya’ want me that bad huh?” He chuckled leaning himself further between your legs, his fingers still doing their job as his face got closer to yours.

“Why should I give a slut like you my dick?” He questioned, you barley able to answer him over the feeling of his thick, touch fingers pounding into your pussy. “C-cuz…please?” You beg, your eyes slightly welling up with tears of desperation. You’ve never felt so hot and needy in your life.

Katsuki hummed at your expression, he could feel his cock throbbing in his pants, his mind being clouded with lust. Finally having you laying in his bed, it felt like a dream.

Katsuki removed his sweatpants and boxers swiftly, ready to feel you. Of course he couldn’t think properly, not even caring to get a condom…not like he had one in the first place, him being a virgin. He was simply acting on instinct and desire.

You try your best to brace yourself, trying to get a peak at his dick. You couldn’t really due to his tank top dropping a bit far where you could only make out a bit of it, and boy was he bigger than you thought he would be.

His dick wasn’t huge, it was the perfect size about 6.5-7 inches and hell was he pretty girthy. This made your anxiety peak a little. Will that hurt? Well the only thing that’s been inside your body until this moment has been your fingers. So yeah pretty sure it’s gonna hurt.

“Look at me.” You heard the blonde boy growl, one of his free hands forcing you to look up at him, making eye contact the whole time he slowly put in his dick.

“Ah..! Katsu-…it hurts!” You hiss in pain, feeling his dick stretch out your walls. He simply groaned, stopping a little bit to make sure you adjust to him. “Fuck.” Katsuki leaned in to kiss you, trying to help distract you from the pain as he slid the rest of his dick inside you.

You moan into his mouth, deepening the kiss as you felt even more pain writhe throughout your body. Soon the pain easing into a more pleasurable feeling. Oh you felt so full.

“Kats..!” You separate the kiss, leaving a string of saliva from one another’s lips. “You can…you can move” you struggle to say. Katsuki didn’t waste anytime, slowly he started moving his hips. He was trying his best to hold himself back, but you were so fucking tight and he just wanted to ravage you.

Slowly his thrusts became faster, leaving you a moaning mess as your vision became a bit blurred. Oh how you didn’t regret teasing Katsuki at all if it all means he wanted you this badly as well.

“Fuck!” Katsuki exclaimed looking back into your blurred eyes, loving how pathetic you looked underneath him. “Ya’ look like a whore.” Katsuki’s comment made you feel something, you never thought you’d like anything like that but his comment turned you on even more.

“Ya’ like that huh? Like being called a fucking whore and slut.” You gulp, nodding your head profusely as he kept fucking your pussy.

“Katsu…please! More!” You beg, you couldn’t help but give up your own will because you just felt so good. “Beggin like a fucking whore…ya’ so fuckin perfect for me.” Bakugou kissed you, a rough and sloppy kiss.

You felt like a fucking pornstar as you stared at the ceiling when he kissed you, feeling closer and closer towards your climax. Fuck…thought I’d last longer. You admitted to yourself.

Immediately you remove yourself from the kiss, letting out pathetic moans, “gonna…cum!~” you shout, wrapping your legs around his waist trying to trap his dick inside you.

“Fuckin cum ya’ slut.” Throwing your head back in pleasure, you could feel your legs violently shake as you finally came. Katsuki stopped, looking at your pathetic state and with a lick of his lips he lifted one of your legs over his shoulders.

“Wh…what…?” You question, barley able lift your head to see what he’s doing.

“I haven’t cum yet…” he gave you his signature smirk.

Oh fuck. You were in for a long night.

AN: This took me a lot longer to complete than I liked it to. I got stuck at the sex scene because I just forgot how to write it. So I’m trying to practice on smut again! I hope you all enjoyed it I am sick rn so I will proof read this later! Thank you so much for all the love!! Xoxo Stinmybubs.

[flavored-soda]

BuckTommy/Kinley/Tevan Headcanons because the brainrot is real

Rating: Explicit (18+ minors dni)

One thing I gotta get out of the way is that Buck was a sex addict at one point. He’s not a newbie to the BDSM/kink scene and he’s certainly not a virgin. He may not know every little thing about gay sex but he’s not clueless.

Ok, so now that that's out of the way:

Buck bottoms majority of the time. Their first time, Tommy bottomed, and while it was great and amazing, once he tried it for the first time, he found he preferred it over topping.

Tommy has a major Daddy kink. He brought it up ONE TIME, once, and Buck has not forgotten. He waits for the perfect opportunities to use and abuse the kink in his favor.

Which brings to my next point: Buck is a brat.

One of Buck's favorite things about sex before Tommy was getting to eat his partner's out. He loved having his mouth on them and being able to reduce them to squirming messes with only his mouth. It's no different now that he's with Tommy. He loves sucking him off. He even ate out Tommy one time and he found it to be a religious experience.

Toys on toys on toys on toys. Buck has always been one experimental and kinky motherfucker. That didn't change with Tommy.

Tommy is a soft dom all the way. He can be mean but he has to be in the right headspace and often takes some planning on both their parts.

When Tommy is mean, he is mean. He'll never admit it, but he's a little bit of a sadist, and watching his boyfriend squirm and shake from dry orgasm after dry orgasm or being edged for hours really does it for him.

Buck loves himself some impact play. The flogger that Tommy surprised him with one night is his favorite. He finds himself begging for Tommy to use it on him almost every scene.

They end up having more vanilla-love-making sessions than anything. Sometimes, they can weeks to a month without their schedules truly lining up to spend time together probably, so they cherish when they can. The intimacy of just being in each other's space, being able to be so close with the other and holding each other means more to them than any kind of hot and kinky scene.

Aftercare (because it is very very important people!!!):

It depends on the type of scene what aftercare each of them need: Tommy usually always needs cuddles. He likes being the big spoon and running his hands over Buck's body, placing soft kisses where he can. He's checking his handiwork while also checking to making sure the younger is okay. If he can't have cuddles, he'll settle for holding hands, he just needs to be touching Buck in some way.

Buck is typically always down for cuddles and kisses, especially after particularly rough scenes. Praise and words of affirmation are another big thing on his aftercare list and Tommy is always happy to provide.

There are times when both men need something different. Sometimes, Tommy, who is normally the talkative one, goes silent and needs that silence. When he gets like this, Buck will usually pull the older man on top of his chest, letting Tommy's head rest right over his heart as he combs his fingers through the older's hair. He'll give him a kiss or two every once and a while until they fall asleep.

After particularly hardcore scenes, Buck will need a minute or two to come back to earth (especially when he first starting subbing for Tommy.) During this time, Tommy cleans him up, gets him water, maybe a snack, and lays next to him, running his hands through the younger's hair and down his cheek. When Buck comes back to himself, it can be a lot. Often times he needs lots of praise and reassurance and skin to skin contact. But there are times that Buck needs one of his boyfriend's hoodies, a movie or show in the background, and the most contact being one of Tommy's hands on his thigh or around his shoulders. He'll always fall asleep with the hoodie on only to wake up later, complain about how hot it is, and press his newly naked torso to his boyfriend's.

When the aftercare continues into the morning, whoever wakes up first either cooks breakfast or orders food (it's usually Tommy waking up first, years out of the military and he still can't break some of the habits.) The day is usually a lazy one, spent in little to no clothes or only each other's clothes. The farthest they'll go is lazy makeout sessions. Except for that one time that Buck had ever so desperately begged to give Tommy a blowjob, only to nearly fall asleep with Tommy's cock in his mouth, his head resting against the older man's thigh. Needless to say, cockwarming become a regular thing after that.

Bonus:

Tommy has been out of practice for a long while, at least a couple of years. He was just as nervous their first time as Buck was.

Buck still is recovering from his Buck 1.0 days. It's something that Tommy notices and helps him through by getting Buck into sex therapy (with a therapist who isn't going to take advantage of him) and will come to sessions when asked.

feel free to come scream at me in my asks about these :D

[bravo4iscool]

Hi! I was wondering if you could write a friends to lovers x reader for any of the 141 (you get to choose) where the reader is plus size and she avoids them touching her? Because she knows she's plus size and doesn't think this super attractive soldier would ever even like her, much less her body, and every time she is touched she kinda pulls away, but our soldiers are so down bad for her? 👀 And ultimately maybe she gets pulled onto a lap and immediately tries to get off? Smut or no smut, it's up to you!

Thank you lovely!! 💞💞

i like this. i like this very very much hehehehe. i chose simon (i always chose him, i really have to change that😭) (i hope you're okay with that tho. it's my personal headcanon that that man is a chubby chaser by heart lol).

as someone who's also plus-size i adore requests like this so much! i hope i could write it the way you imagined it :)

also, sorry this took me so long😭. i had a bit of a slump lol (also, please give me feedback on the smut part, i never really write smut🥲 and im a virgin lmao)

smut, plus-size!reader, unprotected sex, p in v, fem!reader, not proof-read!

(masterlist | join my tag list!)

REQUESTS/ASKS OPEN!!!

tag list - @yazt09 @blackhawkfanatic @bumblebeesfromvenus

"don't touch me simon," you mumble as you push his hands away. "you know i don't like that..." you shuffle away from him and clutch the little notepad you scribble down your customers orders.

he frowns—as always—and gives you a small smile. “‘m sorry lovie. i forgot.”

you nod and straighten your back. “your usual?” you ask, already knowing that he’ll answer with yes. and he does. then you look at the rest of the team, one eyebrow raised. it was rare that they took something else than their usual.

“positive,” price replies, as well as gaz.

“i’ll take whatever ye gimme,” johnny winks and you feel yourself blush. simon just rolls his eyes. he’s getting fed up with his best friend already.

you give johnny a honest smile and scribble something down. “10 minutes and i will be back with your drinks,” you tell them, turning to leave.

once you were out of reach johnny elbowed simon into the side, a devilish smirk on his face. “have ye told ye lassie that ye like her?” he wants to know, wiggling with his eyebrows.

“zip it johnny,” simon only grumbles, starting to bounce his knee. “i ain’t tellin’er nothin’.”

“but why? ye clearly like her.” johnny frowns. if he were in simon’s position he would’ve shot his shot weeks, if not months ago. you were—you were perfection. those curves, those hips and—god forbid—your stomach.

you were hypnotising and you didn’t even know it. johnny didn’t understand how simon could just sit and watch you. he would’ve done anything to get a taste of you, or even just a glance.

“she ain’t interested n’me johnny,” simon sighs after a moment of silence. “i won’t destroy what we have over my stupid feelings.” and with that the debate was over for simon.

before johnny could answer you return with the drinks, placing them down onto the table. “here ya go,” you smile.

“thanks lassie,” johnny grins, patting your hand. you immediately pull away.

you try to overplay it. “no problem. let me know if you need anything else.” you leave with hurried steps, praying you wouldn’t encounter touch again this evening.

-

‘fuck’ you thought when you realize: all seats were taken. this was not good, nope. you just wanted to turn around and leave without anyone taking a notice of you.

but then soap notices you, “ey lassie. com’ere!” he smiles and waves at you. with hesitant steps you walk in his and simon’s direction. giving a apologetic look to the other people. this was a movie night, not some coffee gossip round. it was rare that you were on base and on most occasions you tried to avoid it but johnny and gaz practically begged you to come so you had no other chance than to say yes.

a few moments later you stood in front of the group of men—your friends—unsure what to do. were you just gonna sit on the ground or… before you can even finish that thought a arm wraps around your waist and someone pulls you into their lap. you can‘t suppress a small yelp, your eyes blow wide.

“‘s j‘st me,“ simon whispers into your ear, sending a cold shiver down your spine. you wanted to leave. now.

“simon,“ you hiss. “let me go. i‘m way too heavy for you—“

but instead of following your request his arm around your waist only tightens. “i‘m a big guy. i can handle it,“ he only says in a low voice. with that the topic was done for him and you knew arguing wouldn‘t make sense. once simon was determined about something there was no way to chance his mind.

so, you sat in his lap the whole movie, squirming from time to time; afraid you were too heavy for him, afraid that you would hurt him in any way. meanwhile, his hands were caressing our waist, pulling you closer to him so you‘d stop wiggling around. if you wouldn‘t stop he‘d some have a problem…

beside simon johnny was throwing side glances at him, smirking when he noticed the struggles his best friend was having. he wished he was in that position… if only he‘d been a tad faster than simon you‘d sit in his lap right now and he knew he wouldn‘t be the same after than.

“y‘alright lassie?“ johnny asks as soon as the movie is over and the lights got turned on. your face was red and your pupils blown wide. you only manage a nod, trying your best to get off simon‘s lap as normal—and fast—as possible.

“i think—i think i‘ll go home now. i have work tomorrow morning,“ you smile, still embarrassed. “i hope i‘ll see you tomorrow or are you shipping out?“

“not for at least two weeks,“ simon answers and you nod and turn to leave but then he gets up too and you stop in your tracks. you raise your eyebrow at him and he shrugs. “‘m gonna get ya home,“ he simply says and you nod again.

“alright. see you soon guys,“ you wave your goodbyes to gaz and johnny.

once you and simon where out of reach johnny started to smirk. “ohhhh, he‘s tryna get laid,“ he laughs, glancing at gaz beside him.

“100%“ the other man agrees, hiding his laughter behind his hand. “the question is if she‘s understanding all the signs…“

-

you unlock your door, simon towering over you from behind, his presence like a burning sensation you couldn‘t seem to ignore. “and we‘re there,“ you chuckle, stepping aside. “you can, uh, leave now,“ you tell him but instead of turning around he takes a step inside your flat, closing the door behind him.

“what if i don‘t want to?“ he asks, slowly coming closer to you. “what…if i want to spend the night with you, mh?“ he‘s looking down at you, his hand itching towards to your face.

you swallow, trying to hold his gaze; it seemed impossible. “why would you want that?“ you want to know, unable to phantom any reason he—out of all men—would want to spend a night with you.

he smiles at your question and lowers his head. “because i like you,“ is his answer before he starts to trails kisses down your throat. your breath gets caught and your hands rush to grip his arms. what was happening right now? this must be a dream…

"if you want t'stop, tell me," he mumbles against your neck, slowly pushing you back until your back hits your drawer. you swallow but turn your head to give him more space. it just felt so good.

your breath hitches when he finds your weak spot. "i don't want to stop," you manage to say and you feel him smirk against your skin.

he scoops you up into his arms and you yelp. "that was what i wanted t'hear," he says and seconds later his lips collide with yours as he makes his way to your bedroom. you feel like a feather in his arms, so light and free.

"been wantin' t'do this f'r a long time," simon breathes against your lips when he gently drops you down onto your bed and he pulls back. "y'look so beautiful..." his eyes admire you and you start to blush. you weren't used to being appreciated like that. especially not by men like simon.

he sits up, kneeling in front of you. then he pulls off his shirt in a smooth motion, tossing it aside. your eyes widen and you swallow again. oh steaming jesus, he looked better than you thought–

and suddenly you get aware of your looks again. you try to hide behind your arms as fast as possible, not wanting simon to see but he beats you to it. with gentle hands he grabs your wrists and pulls them away. "why're you doing that, mh?" he wants to know and you avert your gaze.

"i...don't know..." you mumble. "i just–"

he cuts you off before you can finish, "y'think i don't find ya attractive, do ya?" your blush is answer enough and he bents down. "you're the most attractive woman i've ever laid m'eyes upon..." he tells you in a whisper, placing kisses upon your face.

"you don't–"

"oh, i mean it. with every fiber of my being," he, again, cuts you off, not wanting you to doubt his attraction to you. you were beautiful, etheral even, and he didn't know how other men didn't see it. "let me worship you," he pleads, kissing your lips.

he pulls slightly back again and looks in your eyes. he wanted your consent before continung. if you'd say no, he'd stop. if you'd say yes, he would ravish you.

you hesitate for a second before you drag him back down by his neck and press a kiss to his lips. "please," you choke out, looking at him with hooded eyes.

he smiles, his hands slipping beneath your shirt, pushing it upwards. "your wish is my command love." with gentle hands he starts to undress you, trailing kisses all over your body. he wanted to you to feel good about yourself, to feel attractive.

and with every passing moment he was itching down towards your core, smirking when he feels you twitching and shuddering.

“si—simon,” you moan when his lips ghost over your clothed cunt.

he does it again, looking up at you through hooded eyes. “shhhh,” he coos, his tumb caressing your thigh. “b’good f’r me, will ya?” he was straining himself to not rip your clothes off when he started undressing you piece by piece. he wanted to cherish you, burn the image of you sprawled across your bed—naked—into his mind. who knew when he’d be able to see you like that again?

it felt like a haze, the way he was undressing and worshipping your body, his eyes rarely leaving yours. he wanted to you feel seen, to feel lusted after because that was exactly what he was doing.

he came face to face with you again, his lips finding yours while his hand cupped your pussy. your breath hitched. “so ready for me,” he chuckles, his tumb carefully starting to stimulate your clit.

a whine escapes you when he pulls his hand back after a few moments and he can’t suppress a smirk. “oh, ya needy, aren’t ya?” you only manage a nod, your mouth falling open when you feel him slipping one finger inside. “gon’ work ya well open first, love,” he tells you before he starts to litter you with kisses again.

with a steady rhythm he pumps his finger in and out of you, trying to pay attention to your body’s reaction as best as possible. he wanted to make this about you and you only.

he was sucking bruises onto your skin while moans dripped past your lips. oh, he felt like he was in heaven. “keep makin’ them sounds f’r me love,” he mumbles as he starts to hump your bed. his dick was painfully hard by now and he needed to feel some relief.

you gasp and writhe and whine, grabbing his arm to feel something between your hands. “please simon,” you cry out with your back arching off the mattress. “i wanna—“ he shuts you up with a kiss.

“i know what ya want.” and exactly that is the moment your orgasm ripples through you. a dragged out moan leaves your mouth and your fingernails bore into the flesh of his arms. “j’st like that,” simon coos, carefully removing his hand from your cunt.

you gasp for air as you come down from your high, still not 100% sure if this was real; because it didn’t feel like it. you release simon’s arms from your grip, swallowing when you saw the marks you left.

in the meanwhile simon fully undressed himself, his painfully hard cock finally getting set free. he looked at you and a smirk tugged at his lips when he noticed you staring. he tugged at his cock before he crawled back onto the bed to hover about you.

you look up at him, unsure of what to do. it’s been probably years since you’ve last had sex. it wasn’t that much of a regular thing in your life.

“ya ready?” he asks you after he connects your lips in a gentle kiss. you nod and he carefully starts to open your legs further. “i’ll be gentle, yea?”

simon’s hands caress your thighs before he aligns his cock with your entrance and trains his eyes on you as he starts to push himself inside.

your mouth falls open and your hands find their way back to grip onto his arms. a tear slips past your eye and a loud moan drags past your lips. “simon—oh my god!”

he grunts, doing his best to hold himself back from restlessly pounding into you. he didn’t want to hurt you. “no god ‘ere love. only me.” he bends down to kiss you and one of his hands starts to stimulate your clit again.

when he fully bottomed out it took all of his self control to not come immediately. he’s dreamed of this for months, years even and not it was finally happening.

“takin’ me s’good,” simon whispers in your ear, slowly pulling his hips back, making you whine before he pushes them forward again, pulling another moan out of you. “this pussy was made for me, huh.” a cocky grin was on his face.

you nod and babble, too overwhelmed by that pleasure that was so unknown to you. “wanna be good for you,” you cry, clutching his arm with your hands. “please simon.”

he starts to trail kisses down your throat while he keeps his thrusts in a steady rhythm. he felt his orgasm building but he wouldn’t come before you didn’t. this wasn’t about him and his pleasure, this was about you.

you moan, “oh—oh—“ when you feel the knot in your stomach tightening. “i’m gonna come simon,” your voice trembles.

“i know,” he grits out as he fastens his thrusts and keeps stimulation your clit. the way you were clenching around him had him seeing stars. you were so close.

and then he pushes you over the cliff, your orgasm rippling through you with a force you didn’t know as possible. your vision fades to black and your mouth falls open as simon fucks you through your orgasm.

he’s trying his best to keep his composure when you clench around him, almost milking him but he pushes through, managing a couple sloppy thrusts before he comes with a deep moan, fully burying himself inside you.

his eyes are closed as he tries to take a deep breath, a faint ‘i love you’ leaving his lips.

(i’m sorry the end is like that. i’m terrible at endings🧍🏼. i didn’t know how to properly cut this😭)

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Quiet Ones 7

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You live a quiet life, but your peace is fractured by a chaotic man.

Characters: Lloyd Hansen, short!shy!reader

Note: like Staind said in that one song, it's been a while.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Asking for more or putting ‘part 2?’ is not feedback.

Love you all. You are appreciated and your are worthy. Treat yourself with care. 💖

Lloyd brings you down the flight of stairs, his arm through yours as you teeter in the heels. You’ve never been one for anything besides flats or sneakers. You’re getting acquainted to the painful arch of your feet and it’s doing little for your agitation. 

While this man might be entirely too direct at times, he can be just as vague. You still have no idea why you’re dressed like some dainty rose. Whatever delusion he’s living in, it’s not the fairytale he believes it is. 

Savoury aromas waft in the air and draw your nose towards the kitchen. You glance at Lloyd curiously. He puts his hand over yours and winks. You quickly turn your head straight. 

“Don’t worry, jelly bean, I got everything sorted. Can’t have you sweating up a storm in the kitchen. Private chef,” he clicks his tongue, “besides, our guests won’t settle for anything less.” 

You arch a brow but don’t ask. As much as you want to know who he’s expecting, you dread finding out. You highly doubt it’s good company. 

He takes you into the living room. A large chandelier dangles from the high ceiling, the long crystals casting marbled pale light around the space. The tall windows peer out onto the green lawn, dim in the rising evening hue. The ornaments are just as sleek and precise as every other room. Polished marble and spotless porcelain. 

As you take in the curved couch and round ottoman, Lloyd shifts your hand from the crook of his arm and tugs you to face him. He raises your knuckles high and kisses them. You blanch and resist the urge to pull away. His mustache tickles your skin. 

“Baby, you look spectacular,” he purrs, “did I mention that dress hugs your ass in all the right ways.” 

You bite down and nearly snatch your arm away. No. Don’t rile him. Tolerance will keep you safe.  

“You didn’t,” you murmur as he clings to your hand and places it against the chest of his jacket. He wraps you up in his arms as if he means to dance with you. 

“Well, shit, it really does,” his hands crawl down your sides and he scoops your ass up in his large hands, forcing a squeak from you as you press against his chest. “How about an extra dessert tonight?” He winks. “I bet it’s sweet, huh?” 

He leans in, nuzzling your forehead as he growls. You shudder, but he might mistake it for excitement. His nose brushes yours but his lips stop short of yours as a chime interrupts him. He freezes and reluctantly draws away. 

“Wait here,” he smirks and flutters his fingers longingly as he struts away. 

You blow out through your lips and swivel to glance around. It’s a nice place but you miss your apartment. You miss being alone. You miss when you didn’t know this man. 

You mash your hands together and wring them. You hear voices. A man and a woman. Great. This is really strange. You don’t understand what exactly he’s up to. Is he not afraid you’ll start begging for help? Somehow you don’t think that would do you much good. 

“She’s in here,” Lloyd’s voice carries through ahead of him, “mom, dad, my lady,” he waves towards you. 

You stand frozen to the floor. Uh. Mom? Dad? Oh gosh, it’s a family dinner. You blink and slowly step forward as Lloyd waves you closer. 

“My mother, Delores, and father, Lawrence,” he introduces the two other figures. 

The woman is tall and blond and statuesque. You feel even smaller in her presence. She looks down her long nose, her irises blue as ice, and her lips a soft shade of rose. Her hair is so icy, you can’t tell if it’s blonde or silver. 

The man is as tall as Lloyd, a little broader, and wears a cerulean jacket over black. His hair is streaked with the same sandy shade as his son, mingled with shocks of white. He tilts his head as he measures you, his eyes narrowing. 

“Hm,” that’s all you get. You feel much the same. 

“We’ve come all this way, tell me supper is ready,” the woman, Delores, tuts. “Crab cakes, right, honey?” 

She looks at her son and he frowns. His mustache makes the expression even more theatrical. You hate to disappoint but what did he expect? I mean, look at you. 

“And I appreciate you coming,” Lloyd says, sounding unlike you’ve ever heard him in your short acquaintance. Something about it is disingenuous, for as honest as that man can be. “We’re super excited to have you.” 

“Have you had those windows looked at?” The man stops to scope the ceiling to floor panes, “impractical things.” 

Lloyd’s shoulders square. You can’t see his face but you’re certain he’s not happy. You don’t see anything wrong with the place. It’s a bit over the top, too sleek, too shiny, but it’s not horrid. Most people can’t afford anything like it. People like you in your boxy apartment. 

“This way,” Lloyd says and waves them towards another doorway.  

He takes them across the entryway and you follow behind. The dining room has high ceilings and an overly long table. You can’t imagine anyone would ever need that many seats. 

Lawrence sneers with disapproval as Lloyd pulls out a chair for his mother. Delores primps herself as she sits, popping a compact out of her purse to touch up her lipstick. You stare from the doorway, drawn forward as your host clears his throat and eases another chair away from the table. 

You near and sit. His parents have even you on eggshells. You can tell they won’t be much help to you. You’ve got more than enough with their son. 

“I’ll just go check on dinner and you can get to know each other,” Lloyd declares as he claps his hands. 

You wince as his mother snaps the mirror shut and puts it away. She looks you up and down as you keep a dull stare. His father examines the butter knife as if searching for any speck of filth. 

“So, dear,” Delores begins. “Aren’t you a quaint one?” 

You scrunch your nose up. Quaint? You’re not a house. 

“Quiet, aren’t you?” She chuckles, “well, what do you do then? How’d he find you?” 

“Probably one of those websites again,” Lawrence grumbles and curls his lips. “Women these days, they’ll jump at a dollar sign.” 

You shake your head and tilt it. You’re not a mean person. You wouldn’t consider yourself malicious at all but he annoys you. And her. Their judgement reminds you of your schoolyard bullies. 

“I do data entry,” you answer, ignoring the snipe. “We met... uh...” you frown and look at the table.  

We met when your son stalked me and starved me out of my apartment. Yeah, you don’t think that’s going to get more than another condescending trill from her and indifferent grunt from him. You pick at your nail, the movement catching her eye, and you pull your hands apart and hide them behind the table. 

“We met...” 

“At the cafe,” Lloyd strides in and approaches the chair next to you, standing behind it, “supper will be out shortly.” He sits and grabs your hand, bringing it onto the tabletop, “you know, I saw her from across the coffee shop. Just waiting. I was just taken by her. Her effortless beauty--” 

“Effortless indeed,” Delores comments. 

You flick your lashes and glance over at your abductor. How is he preferable in this moment? You blink and turn your dull gaze ahead, staring through the blonde. You don't do well with confrontation, you're more the type for avoidance.

Lloyd quiets and brings his other hand up, chewing his fingertips before ripping them away from his mouth. He keeps his grip on you with his other and sighs. He looks up and shrugs. 

The silence doesn’t last long as several bodies enter and lay out plates in front of each seat. A man in a black jacket and chef’s cap emerges and announces the appetizer; crab cakes with black truffle crostini. You stare at the food. It doesn’t look very tasty; it’s too curated. 

“Mm, crab,” Delores sings as she picks up her cutlery, “how delightful.” 

“Yes, see, I remembered,” Lloyd utters. 

“All this flash,” Lawrence clucks as he lifts his fork, “you know, there’s more too life than show. Your fancy car, the house, your women...” 

“Dad,” Lloyd goes rigid, “she’s not just another woman. I wouldn’t bring you here if--” 

“Oh, no? The last one, I recall, was wearing a bright red thong. How do you think I know that?” The older man snips. 

“She’s not like that,” Lloyd rebuffs. “I told you, she’s different. She’s the one.” 

“Well, she definitely doesn’t talk as much as the last one,” Delores remarks tritely. “And Lawr,” she nudges her husband with her elbow, “she does have a certain allure. She definitely is... different.” 

Your brows nearly meet in the middle. You close your eyes to hide the roll. You exhale through your nose. You don’t care about these people. You don’t even want to be here. So, why try? 

That's it. Don't try. You don't need to impress any of them. You're not going to dance for them like they want you to. They aren't your parents and your own parents don't earn enough of your concern. You don't care about them and you definitely don't care about the man beside you.

Defence is the best offence, right? You're not going for an outright attack, that won't work. It's about repulsion.

You wiggle free of Lloyd’s grasp and surpass the cutlery to pick up the crostini with your fingers. You shove the whole cracker in your mouth and chew without caution. You hum and nod as you swallow it down. Maybe if you can disgust his parents enough, they’ll make him get rid of you. It’s not much of plan but more than you had before. 

“Oh my,” Delores hovers her cutlery over the crab cake and gapes at you. 

“Mm, oh my, good,” you speak through a full mouth. 

“Uh, right, mom,” Lloyd raises his voice, “did you try the wine?” 

“The wine,” you say through another mouthful, “mmm.” 

You slurp messily. Your heart is racing and your skin is tingly. You don’t talk in front of strangers often. Always mindful of every single action. You never want to draw attention. Never step out of line but now, you’re toeing every one. It’s embarrassing. 

“Lloyd,” Delores breathes. 

“Honey,” Lloyd touches your shoulder, “let’s slow down.” 

“I’m starving,” you argue and nearly choke, coughing into your hand. 

“We still have several courses,” he lowers his voice, “please, jelly bean, don’t do that.” 

“Do we have any more of this stuff,” you hold up the second crostini. 

“Please,” he begs and puts his hand on your thigh, squeezing. 

You smile, food in your teeth, and show it to the table. You’re going to barf, not just from the soft cheese but your humiliation. Hold it together, just a little longer. 

“She definitely is... something,” Lawrence says and sends his wife a look of disgust. 

You clear your plate as quickly as you can. The food is like rocks in your stomach. You’re not used to eating that much, not to mention, that sort of fare. It’s rich to the point of too much. 

You wiggle your nail between your teeth and pick at them until Lloyd grabs your hand. You flutter your lashes in his direction. You really think you might throw up. Not only because of the fishy taste in your mouth. 

Before you can think of your next move, the plates are cleared away and replaced with the next course. An entree of filet mignon and seasonal vegetables, as announced by the chef. You imagine it’s similar to what they serve in those fine restaurants you could never afford. 

“Fine cut,” Lawrence offers as he turns over the steak with his knife and fork. 

You saw through your own and look at the middle, “ew, is it supposed to be this colour?” 

The table is quiet as you poke at the steak with your knife. You push it to the edge of the plate and make a face. You poke at the roasted potatoes instead.  

“Rare,” Lawrence sniffs, “I’ll take the chef’s name.” 

“Can he make cheeseburgers?” You ask. 

“Jelly bean,” Lloyd hisses, “what’s going on? What’s wrong with you?” 

“Nothing’s wrong,” you shrug and look at your plate and huff, “fine.” 

Like a bratty kid you pout. You pick up the steak with your hand and gnaw on it, making it into an effort. Lloyd reaches over and takes it from you, putting it back on your plate. 

“Stop, please,” he begs. 

You shrug and wipe your hands on your dress. He latches onto your hand, gripping it tight until your joints hurt. You wince as he stands, still clinging to you. 

“I was meaning to wait until dessert but... she’s had a long day. She’s not feeling herself,” he reaches into his jacket with his other hand and turns. He looks down at you and clears his throat, lowering himself to his knee. His blue eyes meet your grimace. Oh, god. “Jelly bean, sweetheart,” he pulls out the velvet box and your stomach lurches, “will you--” 

You bend over your lap as you lose all control. You spew onto the floor, the sick splashing onto your feet and Lloyd’s pants. You cup your mouth as you puff, bile staining your tongue. You groan and stay folded over your knees. 

“Oh, Lloyd, you can’t mean to marry that?” Delores sneers. 

“Truly, son, you brought us here for... her? Really?” 

Lloyd looks at you and his forehead lines. He shakes his head and opens the ring box, picking the ring from the cushion, and grabs your hand. He shoves the row of large diamonds onto your finger. You stare at the sparkle in horror as you slowly sit up and he stands. 

“We are getting married,” he insists, “and I didn’t bring you here for your blessing. I only brought you to let you know.” 

“Married?” You and Delores echo in fraught unison. 

“Yes!” Lloyd stomps his foot, nearly stepping in the puke. “You can’t stop me, she can’t stop me,” he jabs his finger in the air, “no one can stop me!” 

“Settle down, boy,” Lawrence says. 

“Come on, baby,” Lloyd snatches your wrist and pulls you to your feet, “let me get you cleaned up.” He winks and wiggles his tongue out at you and his parents groan.  He curls his arm around you and lowers his voice to a whisper, "I got something else for you to choke on."

Well, that didn’t work.