#I know what inevitably happens but I've never seen it just read about it so I will update you guys eventually

[mikeybutnotway]

I'm so fucking normal about red dead redemption 2 I'm so fucking normal about red dead redemption 2 in so fucking normal about red read redemption 2 in so fucking nornal about ded read redendion 2 Iv so fucking mornal abont fed dread fedemption 2 in sp fucking bormal arout

[evangelifloss]

Thinking about a certain scene in Dungeon Meshi that completely encapsulates the Autistic experience of making friends as an adult and how hard it is to try and navigate it without ending up getting hurt.

Like IDK about y'all, but this is a common problem ALOT of Autistic Adults face when trying to make friends with other people, because unlike children who aren't good at keeping their opinions to themselves, Adults ARE. In society, we're even encouraged to "keep the peace" "be polite" and etc, which commonly leads to awful scenarios as shown above when Laois finds out his buddy has come to resent who Laois is without actually telling him. All too often the friends that we love to hang out with, people that we're so happy to spend time with, don't feel the same way and in many cases, come to blame us for our social cues or lack thereof.

And when/if we do eventually find out how our friend feels, Dungeon Meshi hits us with another painful panel of how that usually ends up playing out.

It's hard for Adults with Autism to make friends, and even harder to maintain them because alot of the ways Neurotypicals tell other Neurotypicals that they don't like a certain behavior is by quietly disengaging. Whether that involves having one sentence answers, going quiet, or having a certain tone in their voice, all those things signal annoyance or disapproval, but for the Neurodivergents, those subtle cues are completely missed.

And yet when we inevitably discover we DID do something, it is natural to ask "well why didn't you tell me?" because in our minds, it should've been the next step in the equation. However for the Neurotypicals, that's NOT something to bring up. Its important to be SUBTLE about the issue at hand and rely on signals to tell the other person. Blame is placed on us for not noticing the "obvious" signs of disapproval rather than the idea of talking it out as such things are uncomfortable and harder to do. Alot of the time what ends up happening is resentment due to the idea that it was "obvious" and the fact one didn't notice indicates a deliberate ignorance rather than a complete unawareness. It ends up calling into question our quality as a person and our sincerity. We get called "fake" or "malicious" or even "stupid" for failing social cues rather than questioning the decision to be indirect and vague.

For a manga about exploring the dungeon, it seems that the artist would rather explore very real and prevalent dynamics in society with the adventuring premise as a backdrop. I felt VERY seen in these panels, and many others, because it happens so suddenly and dare I say it, plainly. There's no dramatic build-up or spectacle made and in essence, it just Happens.

I think that's what makes the scene hit even harder. It seemingly comes out of nowhere for Laois, like how it always comes out of nowhere for alot of people, and it's never a dramatic twist either. It's always mundane and hurtful. A sudden unforeseen bump in the road that ends up calling into question one's entire friendship with someone and consequent other friendships. It asks "what if other friends feel the same. What if the people that I really like actually hate me and I don't know it?" Or at least that's what I came away with after reading the chapter. I've been where Laois was and the only reason I'm not there now is because I lost the naivete I had and doubt everyone else's sincerity.

[caramelcleopatraa]

CAUGHT IN 4K

word count: 3.3k

x: finals are coming up, so i'm gonna be very busy, but i'm still writing y'all (this is the most consistent i've been lol) (excuse any errors of course) Hope you guys enjoyyy! leave comments... please. I love your comments.

content: Imani has a crush on Roman. Their friend group goes on live and her secret comes to the light. She thought that she was going to be rejected and move on, but things never go the way people expect. Roman Reigns x Imani, 18+ MDNI, oral (m recieving), cowg!rl, creamp!e

Imani loved weekend kickbacks. Time to chillax with her favorite people, and get her mind off of things. It was moments like these she waited for. Drinks and joints in rotation, and endless fun for hours to come. Jimmy, Jey, Roman, Trinity Talia, and Imani. She wishes that she was only thinking about the good vibes that circulated in the atmosphere, but she was focused on something else. It wasn’t like she was necessarily trying to focus on Roman, but it was inevitable when she could see him so clearly from the kitchen. She knew that having a crush on him could possibly mess up the bond that the group has, but he was so gravitating, He was perfect in her eyes. She basically textbook described him when Trinity and Talia asked her to describe her dream man: Tall, muscular, sweet, absurdly attractive, charismatic, humorous, dedicated. God, she could go on to name every single one of his attributes that she loved. She tried to brush it off as a mistake at first, but there was no part about this that was a mistake. He had a tight grip on her, and he wasn't even aware. She wonders what would happen if he felt the same way. If those pretty brown eyes she daydreamed about would reciprocate the love she was anxiously waiting to give him. She could only imagine all of the things she could do for him, to him, and provide him. If she had him all to herself, how they would spend their nights alone. How it would feel to be wrapped in his embrace. How it would feel to get lost in him between the sheets for hours, and repeat it again the next day. If she had him all to herself.

“WE GETTIN TURNT!” Talia raised her glass in the air and yelled out to her viewers, watching her through the small rectangular frame. Jimmy came around the corner with uno cards in his hands as the six of us gathered around the table. Roman, Trinity, or Jey would pop into the frame to answer a couple of questions while Jimmy shuffles the cards and Imani gathers multiple bottles to bring to the table. “Mani! They have some questions for you!” Imani joins her party, sitting the bottles on the table and scanning through the comments.

‘Do you get to go backstage with the bloodline?’

“Yes! It's amazing, I'm not gonna lie.”

‘Please do a makeup tutorial!’

“Maybe, I don't have a youtube channel.”

‘Seen any guys that have caught your eye?’

“A couple, but they ain’t nothin’ important.”

“Oh word?” Talia and Trinity both look at her with curious faces, but Imani just giggles and goes back to answering questions. 

“Ooh this is a good one. Kiss, marry, fuck: Jason Momoa, Michael B. Jordan, and Roman Reigns,” Talia reads out loud. That question got everyone’s attention. Jimmy stopped fidgeting with the cards and Roman and Jey both put their phones down impatient for her answer. “Well?” Talia was definitely setting her up, and she could feel it. Thank god for her brown skin that covered her fastly spreading blush. “Do I have to answer this?” “Yes, you do. I'm intrigued now,” Trinity says, as Imani quickly takes a double take at the entire table to see them all staring at her. She sighs before surrendering and thinking hard about the question.

“I’ll… kiss… Michael B. Jordan, fuck Jason Momoa, and marry Roman Reigns.” She instantly regretted answering the question before Trinity pried at Imani to get out more information that everyone was itching to know. “Hmm, why marry Roman?” She quickly swiped her drink off of the table and took a long sip, hiding her face. In all honesty, she wanted to say that it was the easiest choice, but that would only make her sound suspicious. And that was not a conversation that she wanted to have in front of quite literally everyone. “I'm not interested in the other guys like that.” “So you’re interested in Roman?” ‘Wait- wait! Noo that's not what I meant!’

“No, I just wouldn't marry the other two men. It’s not that deep Trin,” Imani says, a failed attempt at dismissing the conversation. “You’ve never gotten this defensive before… don’t tell me that you in your feelings.” She could see Talia smirking at the corner of her eyes. She knew she had to stop this fast. “You’re reaching Talia,” Imani says, laughing to herself. “Oooooh Imani wants the Tribal Chief, huh?” Never in her life had she ever been more embarrassed. “Jimmy, for the love of god, please start dealing the cards,” Imani says, covering her face, her words muffled by her hands. Everyone laughs, finding amusement in her nervousness. She anxiously waited for Jimmy to start dealing the cards so this moment could pass.

11:27 pm

Several rounds of uno and spades passed, and the guests were slowly starting to make their way out. She noticed Talia, Trinity, Jey, and Jimmy momentarily texting throughout the night, which would probably explain why the four of them were explaining the consequence of Imani losing a couple of rounds. “Sooooo we thought of something. Don’t be mad! It’s just a punishment for losing so much,” Talia says, sticking out her tongue. “Your punishment is that you have to ask Roman to fuck you.” ‘ASK ROMAN TO WHATT!?!?’

Her surprised face told them everything they needed to know. “You'll be fine. Uce will probably be down to fuck either way,” Jey says. Imani gave Talia a death glare, making Talia laugh. “You’re trippin’ girl. Just approach him with the right energy and make him want to stay with you. I guess this answers the question of if you have a crush on him or not.” Before she could defend herself, Roman walks in from the restroom and the four of them are gone in the blink of an eye. ‘These trifling’ heifers’

“Guess they all left. I should be on my way out then. Thank you for the food and dr-” She steps in front of him, stopping him from exiting out the front door. He looks at her with confusion. “You okay?” Her heart was beating fast. She didn't fully think out what she was going to do after she stepped in front of him, but it was now or never. 

“Fuck me.”

“...what?”

“F-fuck me.” She couldn't look him in the eye the second time. The pressure weighing on her shoulders was too much. But the thing that was racking her brain the most was how close they were. She felt like this was a disaster taking place in real time. She hears a soft chuckle, looking up to see him lightly smiling at her. “Was this your punishment for losing?” She nods, and his smile stays fixed on his face. “Do you want me to?” 

‘...did he say what I think he just said?’

Her mind is searching for an answer, a reason to say no. But she can't find any. As embarrassing and confusing this was, she had daydreamed about this moment. Maybe he was just being nice and would give her a quick fuck to fulfill the punishment. That idea became her leading thought. “You don’t have to if you’re uncomf-” “Do you want me to fuck you Imani?”

‘Shit he’s not joking.’

She slowly nods, which prompts him to lock the front door behind you. Her head was spinning, trying her hardest to maintain her composure. “Ask me again.”

“Fuck me, please,” She says nervously, eyes returning her shiny tile floors. “I don’t believe you sweetheart. Ask me again.” His hand gently grabs at her chin, making Imani look at him. Once they made eye contact, she knew that she was done for. She was already feeling weak from just looking at him. She took a deep breath before finally saying, “Please fuck me Roman.”

He wasted no time pulling her into a heated kiss. Not that she minded. This felt like a wonderful dream that she didn't want to wake up from. Only this wasn't a dream, it was real life. She finally got to feel the body that she had been drooling over. Right now, he was hers, and she was going to make the most of it. 

Her curious hands creeped along his captivating body while they explored each other’s mouths, dragging her hands up his torso from underneath his shirt. He pulled away from her soft lips to trail wet kisses from her cheek to her neck. “Not shy anymore huh?” She couldn't be shy. Her desire for him had completely taken over. “I really need you right now Roman,” She pants out. 

“Bedroom?” She nods and takes his hand in hers, leading the way to her bedroom. The sway of her hips only made Roman more aroused, as he silently admired her body from behind.

They enter her bedroom and she doesn't get a chance to close the door before being pulled into his arms again, temporarily hoisting her in the air to lay her on the spacious bed. He pulls her into another messy kiss, setting his focus on getting rid of their bothersome clothes. He quickly tore his shirt from his body and she did the same with hers. Their lips connected again, moving in harmony. He started to make his way down her body, but she squeezed his shoulders, signaling him to stop. “I wanna make you feel good first.” Roman was surprised to say the least. He kissed her tummy and replied, “Are you sure?” She gives him a confident nod, with those big doe eyes and her beautiful smile. “Alright, what do you want me to do?” “Let’s switch places.”

She scooted to the side, giving him room to lay down on the bed. She crawled down to his waist, tugging both his sweatpants and boxers down. His dick springs out of his pants, finally free from cloth restraints. Her eyes locked with his before lowering down to lick the underside of him; from his balls to his mushroom tip. A wad of spit drips from her mouth and lands on his length, using her hand to lather him up. His soft hums let her know that he was feeling good, and she was determined to make him feel a whole lot better. 

Her juicy lips start at his tip, giving small kitten licks before taking the tip in her mouth. Her warm mouth felt so good on his dick. He didn't know that Imani was this nasty. She gives him kisses up and down his shaft before taking him in her mouth again. 

She didn’t waste any time trying to tease him. He was big, and filled mer mouth well, but it’s nothing she's never handled before. Before she continued, the warmth of her mouth left him once again. “Can you record this?” Just when he thought she couldn't get more nasty. 

“Record?” She nodded her head. “Only if you’re comfortable.” “I’m more than comfortable,” Roman says, while reaching into his sweatpants pocket. He grabs his phone and opens the camera app, pressing record. “It’s recording, baby.” 

She smiles at the camera, curling her fingers around the base of his dick and tapping him against her tongue. She takes him in her mouth again for the final time, keeping her hand put at the base. She bobs her head slowly, swiveling her head from left to right. 

She keeps moving slowly, making sure to fit all she can in her mouth. Her hand that stayed curled around his base, moved in juxtaposition, stroking the rest of him that her mouth couldn't get to. “Goddamn baby, that mouth feels so good. I need that mouth around my dick all the time.” She moans in response, giving him vibrations that made him feel oh so good. She had him moaning and groaning. She didn't mind that at all. She got a big ego boost that he was so vocal from her mouth working its magic. She took note of every moan, every twitch, and any reaction he made. Right now, she was focused on his pleasure. 

His grip on his phone tightened, trying his best to keep his composure. She moved her head faster, still bobbing up and down, and using her hand to stroke his remaining inches. “Ahh s-shit mama, you keep sucking my dick like that and imma cum in your mouth.” She looks at him, already staring at her every move while she’s giving him euphoria like pleasure. She moans around his dick again, feeling her panties dampen. Her other hand massaged his balls lightly. Her slurping sounds made him close to coming. 

He couldn't take his eyes off of her. Those innocent eyes staring into him as he recorded her doing such lewd things. He tried his best not to tangle his hands in her hair and fuck her mouth full of him. But her mouth felt so good, and he wanted nothing more than to cum in her mouth. He couldn’t help himself when his hands disappeared into her hair, planting his feet on the bed and fucking up into her mouth. She put her hands behind her back, letting him use her as he pleased. His thrusts were quick, but soft, his balls slapping against her chin. “Oh fuck! I’m coming mama, ooh I'm comin’.” He kept her head steady while coming deep in her throat, and she accepted with jubilation. 

She bobbed her head a few more times, trying her best to overstimulate him the most she can, until his hand grabs her chin, lifting her up. “Slow down princess,” He says, ending the recording. She crawls up to meet him, giving him a quick passionate kiss. “See how good you taste?” Roman chuckles at her boldness. “Your turn. Lie down,” He says, trying to sit up, but fails due to her pushing him back down on the bed. “I need that dick right now daddy.”

“You don’t want me to eat that pussy?” She runs her hand through her messy hair. “God yes I do, but I need you to fuck me right now.” Her eyes did more pleading than her words. 

“I wanna record this too,” she says, looking down at his chest, tracing the intricate tattoo. He feels around the bed, finally grabbing the phone and reopening the camera app. “Can you prop it up somewhere? I want you to be able to touch me.” “Already on it baby.” He climbed back further on your bed, propping the phone up against the lamp on the nightstand. While he did that, she slid off her shorts and panties, throwing them behind her. He pressed record again, and instructed her to adjust herself so the camera could capture everything. 

His hands landed on her ass as they both observed themself. His hands felt so good kneading her ass, and she saw his eyes drinking in every part of her body. He couldn't keep his hands off of her curvaceous body, and he didn't want to. “You like it?” Her soft hands massaged his shoulders, making him groan softly. “I love it baby, love this ass.” An unexpected slap to her ass made her jump. “You sound so good, daddy.” His hands move her hips along his dick, grinding her body against his. 

“How long have you been thinking about this?” She shies away from his gaze, a sudden flash of embarrassment runs through her body. She had forgotten about all of her feelings of distress and nervousness and realized that she was running on arousal and adrenaline. “A-a couple of months.” He lifts her hips and grabs his length, rubbing the tip along her slit. A few rubs up and down her slickness before impaling her on his dick. They moan simultaneously, relishing in the mind numbing pleasure. “You been thinking about taking this dick baby?” She gives him small head nods, still captured by the feeling of him inside of her. His hands cupped her chin, turning her head to the direction of the phone, steadily recording them. His hands were full of her ass, moving her up and down his shaft slowly. His unsteady breaths and her elongated moans were harmonious. “Go ‘head then. Bounce that ass on my dick.”

Her eyes focused on him as she steadied herself, her hands placed on either side of his head. She throws her ass back, his thighs catching it every time. His eyes were still glued to the phone, watching her beautiful body on top of him. But it wouldn’t be long until he faced her again, her soft titties hanging in front of his face. She had daydreamed about fucking Roman, and she was finally doing it. It gave her confidence knowing that he couldn't keep his hands off of her body. Her facial expression told her exactly how she was feeling. It was almost overwhelming how sexy she was. Beautiful smile, sexy body, paired with addicting moans that made him want to fuck her all night long. 

“Mmm~ look at you taking daddy’s dick. You’re doing so good,” Roman pants, grabbing at her breasts. His gentle praises and gruff voice was enough to make her cum. His dominating presence, his words, his touch. This man had her mind running laps. Even though he wasn’t putting in any effort, he was hitting all the right spots.

Her words were slurred, eyes rolled back, mouth wide open spewing salacious moans. Her hips slowed down, the constant rhythm created by her ass and his thighs meeting no longer lasted while she hid in the crook of his neck. Her body was decorated with a sheet of sweat that didn’t take away from her golden hue. “Look at me.” She rested on her elbows, locking her eyes onto his. Their faces were laced with lust, an unsatisfied want for each other. 

His strong arms caged her in, preventing her from squirming or escaping. She was still catching her breath while Roman planted his feet on the bed again. He places a tender kiss on her cheek before fucking up into her. She grabbed on to any part of his body that could, her eyes fluttering shut. A harsh slap to her ass makes her scream in pleasure. “I said look at me,” Roman says, demanding her full attention.

“Ohhh- my god! You feel so fucking g-good!” Roman loved watching her unravel. How she screamed for glory while he fucked her. God, he could make this his favorite hobby. Making her cum over and over again. “Mhm- fuckk- keep talking to me baby.” Her mind was foggy. She could only focus on one thing right now, how good he was dicking her down. Roman was making her feel so good. She looked at his phone propped up on the nightstand again to see their reflection. Her ass rippled from his hard strokes. That sight alone had her ready to cum. “Shhit! I’m finna cum on that big ass dick!” “Yeah? You finna cum?”

Her nails dug into his broad shoulders, feeling a knot build up in her stomach. “Cum with me Imani, let me feel you cum around my dick.”

Her eyes shut as she came, her orgasm hitting like a dam breaking, sending waves of pleasure throughout her body. His hips slowed down, but still gave her deep strokes, coming deep inside her. High pitched moans and deep grunts filled the room. His hands lazily grab her hips, allowing her to move again. She reached to grab the phone and ended the video, dropping the phone somewhere as she laid limp against his chest. His thumbs worked small circles as they both caught their breath. “I’m gonna take a shower when I get up, wanna join me?” Imani hears him chuckle, still working small circles into her hips. “Nah, we’re not done. I gotta eat that pussy, Imani.”

If these were the punishments she got for losing in spades, maybe losing wasn't so bad after all.

🏷️ tags :) @reignsboy19 @2-muchsauce @theninthwonder @harmshake @alichesmi @thesamoanqueen @alyyaanna @empressdede @badbitchcentralinc @christinabae @fame-ass-ers @southerngirl41 @cyberdejos2

[fancyfeathers]

The Old Therebefore

(Yandere Wriothesley songfic)

connected to my Yandere Neuvillette & Wriothesley series- Yandere Neuvillette & Wriothesly’s darling thoughts, Nothing You Can Take From Me Was Worth Keeping , I’m Bad But Then Your No Prize Either , post story headcannons, Pankration ring rules, Heartbreaking comparisons, Wriothesley’s darling escaping, Encountering his escaped darling, Wriothesley getting hurt by his darling, Neuvillette’s darling escaping, The Birth of the End

TW- This does have hinted at topics of suicidal thoughts towards the end so read with caution

You're headed for heaven, the sweet old hereafter

And I've got one foot in the door

Everyone knows of the Duke of Meropides’s darling, but next to no one actually knows her. The last time anyone saw her was a number of years ago when she just returned to Fontaine, when she was playing in a traveling band. After a small show in the Court of Fontaine they were arrested on the grounds of entering the city without proper documentation, but that was the last time  anyone saw her. Well that is until a number of months later where she was seen at the Duke’s side when he was going to a meeting with the Iudex of Fontaine and there she was, at his side, and with child.

But before I can fly up, I've loose ends to tie up

Right here, in the old there-before

Gossip spread through Fontaine like wildfire, but none of it was true.  One of them knew what happened to her before all that, long before all that. No one knew how a number of years ago how she was arrested under charges that seemed to be kept from the public eyes. No one knew about her private trial, no there was no jury, only her, the Iudex, her defense, and the Oratrice Mecanique d'Analyse Cardinale. No one knows how she was found guilty of a crime she didn’t commit. No one knows how her friend broke her out of the containment facility before she was transferred to the fortress. No one knows about all those months on the run she spent before they were caught. No one knows about the years she spent in captivity in the fortress, kept away from all the world. No one knows that she ran agin, but inevitably had her wings clipped again.

And I'll be along when I've finished my song

When I've shut down the band

When I've played out my hand

When I've paid all my debts

What people know is what is printed in the papers, a beautiful couple who had only been spotted, no actual formal public appearances. The rumors spread about how the Duke’s darling hated public appearances, wanting a break after her music career (if you could call it that). Then there was also the talk of where they live because certainly she would not live at the fortress when with child. 

When I have no regrets

Right here, in the old there-before

When nothing is left anymore

Well that much was true, she did not live at the fortress, anymore. A number of months in her pregnancy she was moved to the countryside of Fontaine, in a small cottage. Then by the time she gave birth to their baby girl, Wriothesley would never leave her side. That’s why he had the meeting with Iudex, to help prepare for time off for his child’s birth.

And I'll catch you up

When I've emptied my cup

When I've worn-out my friends

When I've burned out both ends

In those first few weeks he spent at home, with his darling and daughter, helping make sure his daughter is healthy and darling is recovered from the birth. After those first few weeks or months, he returns to work at the fortress during the days. His darling, since she still had a baby to look after was still tied down, she would not be able to escape with their daughter. She was so cut off from the outside world despite not being trapped under the sea level.

When I've cried all my tears

When I've conquered my fears

Right here, in the old there-before

When nothing is left anymore

Years passed and their baby grew into a little girl, no older than six or seven. The darling watched as her freedom and life slipped by. Sure she was not bound by locked iron doors and metal chains, but now she was bound by child and wedding band. Now the only semblance of freedom she had were the days Wriothesley took them to the city, her daughter saw these as fun family days but the darling was only able to see it as the world that was take from her, but a world that praised the relationship she was in. So now she would much rather spend her days back at the cottage, because then she could lay down in the grass with peace and quiet, no little comments from conversations of people they passed, no clicking of cameras of reporters who spotted them. She was able to be alone with her thoughts, and that’s was as much freedom she got.

And I'll bring the news

When I've danced off my shoes

When my body's closed down

It was the best when her daughter was napping, put into bed. This was her time to be, she could go outside, sitting in the field of grass that acted as her prison, and just be. She used to play music for an audience, now she only sung for herself. Sometimes she like to sing, but sometimes she hated it, both for the same reason, it reminds her of the life she had and lost.

When I've tallied the score

And I'm flat on the floor

Right here, in the old there-before

When nothing is left anymore

But then this moment of peace was almost always ruined by a reminder of her captivity, normally this would be her daughter waking up from her nap and coming outside to listen to her mother sing. But every once and awhile this would be ruined by a muscular hand coming to brush the hair out of her face and a kiss to her cheek, a reminder that her captor still exists.

When I'm pure like a dove

When I've learned how to love

He would call her songbird sometimes, especially in front of their daughter to get silly reactions out of her. But underneath the smile the darling forced, she hated it all, the attention from the jailbird. Sometimes she wished that when she laid down in the grass and closed her eyes that she wouldn’t wake up again.

Right here, in the old there-before

When nothing is left anymore

[staytinyville]

OUTLAW (47)

ATEEZ poly!ot8 x Reader

Cowboy AU / Wild West

Series Masterlist

Warning: none

A/N NOT BETA READ. We have only two more chapters left of this arc! After that I might be taking a break for a bit. Not only to focus on some original novels I have planned but to also have a few chapters ready for you all to read. Cause this having to write chapters the day of updating--hate it lol.

It was a quick affair for when someone had come in to take away Hendricks. He struggled for a moment but after Wooyoung got annoyed with the man’s shouting and fighting, he was quick to shove a rag into the man’s mouth. Seeing as he was cuffed, Hendricks was only able to huff and puff into the fabric. 

When you turned back around to face Klein you watched as he was looking over the papers once more. He had a somber look on his face, one of regret as he sighed at each word that seemed to process into his head. 

“I'd like to thank you for bringing this to my attention.” Klein said, not meeting any of your eyes. 

“You don't seem like it.” Hongjoong raised his brows, crossing his arms as he stood in front of the man. 

“You're still criminals in the eyes of the public.” Klein finally looked up, sighing to himself as his eyes skimmed over all nine of you. 

“We understand.” You spoke up. “You're a respectable man who has a city to protect.”

You watched as Klein suddenly thought about the entire town, going back to clenching his jaw as he began to think lowly of himself. It was a tough job to take on, especially for a town that was the second most populated. You were never going to be able to make everyone happy, but you were able to make the world a better place. At least in your own image.

Your family had always supported Klein–a vast majority of the town did–so he must have felt a heavy pressure on his shoulders knowing that he was close to putting all of them in danger. There aren't many people you are able to trust when it comes to positions in office, especially not with times growing more and more. People were getting greedy as things began to change, which led to problems. But that shouldn’t stop the few who were trying to keep things at peace from doing what they must. 

While Klein had the right intentions–wanting to see Cromer grow into a modern city–he didn’t realize he would fall into a pit of snakes. Human era was inevitable. You were just glad to have stopped everything before it got too far. 

“Will you leave soon?” Klein asked. 

“We have a mission to finish.” Yunho explained. “This was only a side quest.” He chuckled.

Klein huffed a little laugh, pressing his lips together. “This drug.” He asked, tapping on the papers and envelopes. “What happens if it gets out?”

“The world falls.” Seonghwa answered. “It becomes baron of the joys we see everyday.”

“We've seen what it could do.” Jongho called from the back of the group. “It's not something this world should suffer from.”

“Why hasn't Aurora done anything then?” Klein shook his head, not understanding the whole thing. 

“They don't have evidence to prove corruption yet.” Hongjoong told the mayor. “That's what we've been trying to do for the past couple of years.”

The man took a moment to gather his thoughts before moving to grab the things from his desk. “Here.” Klein began to gather all the papers between Quaid and Hendricks, handing them over to you. “Take these then.” He told you.

“What about Quaid?” Mingi asked.

“I've already sent people after him.” Klein answered the boy. “We'll take care of him here in Cromer seeing as it's my jurisdiction.” He turned to look at you, giving you a thankful bow of his head. “Should anything else come to light though, I'll be sure to send word to you.”

“Thank you, Mayor Klein.” You smiled in thanks. 

You watched as he suddenly clapped his hands, rubbing them together. He gave you all a raise of his brow, pursing his lips. “You've all committed crimes that should be punishable but it seems to me you're all hard to catch.”

All of you suddenly looked at him oddly, frowning a bit at his words. You were a bit worried that Klein would somehow punish the boys for all they had done, but as you registered the rest of his sentence you concluded that wasn’t going to be the case. 

“You're letting us go?” You said, being the first to realize what it was he meant. 

“If what you say is true about this drug, then it seems we have a common enemy.” Klein nodded to himself. “I have a city full of people to keep safe. It's what I signed up for as mayor of Cromer.” He took a breath, coming to a stand. “I'll tell the city it wasn't you who stole the money.”

“Tell them you had money left over.” Hongjoong suggested. “You'll be seen as the hero again.”

“As much as one would love to take credit for that, I could not.” Klein shook his head. “I was going to send that money somewhere terrible. I could never live with myself had you not taken it.”

Your shoulders dropped at the man’s convention. He was right in thinking a majority of people would have loved to take the glory and credit for saving the town, but Klein wasn’t a majority of people. He was someone selfless who took care of others first. It was something each of the boys were quick to realize after speaking with him more. 

At least by what you could tell from the looks on their faces. 

“What will you say then?” Wooyoung asked. 

“The truth.” Klein spoke up, smiling as he thought it over. “ATEEZ were the ones who took the money.” He smiled, watching as the boys all gave him skeptical looks. 

“They have never seen your faces.” The mayor added. “I don’t believe they will suspect 8 handsome, young men who work for one of Cromer’s hotels. Unless you have warranted for people to think that.” Klein joked. 

The boys all looked at each other for a moment, humming in thought as they pondered on what they had all done so far in your town. “They haven’t.” You answered for them, sending them looks that called for them to behave. 

You turned back to Klein, bowing your head and giving him a smile. “Thank you.”

“Of course.” Klein nodded his head, giving you a kind smile as well. 

Just as the boys all turned one by one to leave the office, you suddenly gasped, stopping to turn back around. “One more thing!” You called back.

“Yes?” Klein answered. 

“My father.” You began. “He's kind of in jail at the moment.”

Klein laughed, nodding in understandment. “I'll have him released, don't worry.”

“Thank you, Mayor.” You bowed one more time, turning to Hongjoong who waited closer to you.

“Be careful on your mission.” Klein called out before you all left the door. “It doesn't seem easy.” He added. 

You watched as the boys gave each other knowing looks again, Hongjoong sighing as he bowed his head. “It never is.”

Series Masterlist

@thefrog3223 , @iarayara , @0rangemilk , @explorewithd , @detectivedoodle , @bangtanxberm , @a1i33a , @loveforred , @drunken-deitence , @0325tiny , @the-ghostest-with-the-mostest , @atinyreads , @atinytinaa , @lexiigom , @smilingtokki , @mismatchfluffysocks , @brain-empty-only-draken , @sousydive , @alex-tinyy , @h3arteyes4mingi , @onedumbho3 , @popcatx0 , @blue1amory , @mommahwa1117 , @sunnyhokyu , @cloudieclair , @puppyminnnie

[kaminocasey]

Dream A Little Dream of Me: Part 3

Summary: You get into an accident and are transported to the Star Wars galaxy permanently... for the time being. In the meantime, you get closer to Rex.

Pairing: Captain Rex x f!Reader

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI; Angst, reader gets into an accident in the real world, Hardcase lives though!

WC: 4.2K

A/N: HELLO I know it's been a hot minute since I've updated most of my fics, BUT the good news is, I'm focusing on four of my big fics this year: Dream A Little, Sacred Woman, Bonsoir, and Loverboy. I'll also do small fics and try to update the smaller fics when I can! ANYWAY, I am really excited about this fix it fic <3 (pics from Pinterest) AND A HUGE shoutout to my girl @idledreams for reading over this COUNTLESS times and still hyping me up over it (Along with all my writing) You're the best! <3

Dream A Little Masterlist │ Playlist

Don’t panic. 

Don’t panic.

DON’T. PANIC. 

“I meant someone else. I’m not confident that I can-”

“Cut the osik. What’s going on?” Kix crosses his arms, his eyes still narrowed at you.

How are you supposed to get out of this? He clearly knows you well enough to know you’re lying. What if you just tell him the truth? He’ll more than likely think you’re crazy. You’re still not entirely convinced you’re not. 

This is all just starting to feel too real for you, so you close your eyes and will yourself awake.

Wake up. 

WAKE. UP. Goddammit. Why isn’t it working? 

Kix sighs your name, making your eyes snap open again. 

“Just talk to me.” Kix sighs, a pleading look in his eyes. 

Clearly the two of you are good friends here in your dream or alternate reality, or whatever this is.

“Do you promise to not think I’m crazy or to not tell anyone if I tell you?” You ask him, your pleading look matching his own. 

He nods. “Of course.”

As the two of you walk in silence to a more secluded spot, you try to figure out how to tell him the truth. Even though he promised to not think you’re crazy, that doesn’t mean he can stop the intruding thought from popping into his head. And you can’t really blame him. Would you believe you if you were in someone else’s shoes?

“Okay…” You breathe out as you find a closet and go inside. “Okay…” 

Your hands start fidgeting, clenching and unclenching as you pace in the small space. Kix murmurs your name again, stopping you so that you look at him. 

“It’s alright.” He assures you.

You nod, wanting to believe him. 

God, why can’t you wake up?

“I’m not from here…” You start.

He laughs, confused. “Okay?”

“I’m not from this… reality?” You still struggle to find the words. 

“What do you mean?” His brows furrow as he struggles to understand what you’re saying. 

You shake your head, still trying to find the words. 

“Do you know how when I first woke up yesterday, I woke up confused?” 

He nods. “I heard about it.”

“That’s because I’d never been here before…” 

You’re still timid to tell him this is all a tv show in your reality. 

You continue anyway. “My ‘real’ life is somewhere that is different from this galaxy…” 

Kix’s face goes from confused to disbelief rather quickly. You still can’t really believe it yourself.

“I go to sleep at night there and then I’m somehow transported here…” 

“Okay…” He murmurs. “I mean, I’ve heard and seen way stranger things happen.” 

“Y-you believe me?” 

“I have no reason not to. I know for a fact that you’re not crazy.” He smiles softly and you let out a huge sigh of relief. “Unless you’re having some sort of mental breakdown…”

You give him a pointed look and he puts his hands up in surrender. 

“Okay. Not a mental breakdown. Got it.” He nods, smiling. 

He believes you.

“Do you not think anyone else would believe you?” He asks.

You shrug. “Maybe Rex?”

It was only a few moments ago that you found yourself wanting to tell him everything. He’s easy to talk to. That still surprises you. 

Kix smirks knowingly and you roll your eyes.

“Focus please.” You try to hide the flustered expression that is inevitably on your face right now.

“I’m just saying-”

All of a sudden, you and Kix are interrupted by a random 501st trooper as the door slides open and he looks between you and Kix, clearly embarrassed and thinking he walked in on something going on.

“I was looking for towels-” The trooper explains, apologetically.

“It’s alright. I was just leaving…” You look at Kix. “I’ve gotta find Rex.”

A bad feeling settles in your stomach as you quickly walk out of the closet, finding the exit to the building with the only thing on your mind being saving Hardcase.

The moment you wake up, you groan into your pillow with frustration and try to will yourself back to sleep. To no avail, of course. “Goddammit.” You murmur, concern automatically coursing through your body. 

All this stuff that’s going on in your “dream world” is starting to take a toll on your body. As you sit up, you feel tense, as if you’d been nervous all night. Stretching your aching limbs, you look over at your clock and realize it’s almost noon. Which means you’re running late for your lunch with your mother. 

With a quick restless groan and one last stretch, you practically throw yourself out of the comfort of your bed and race around your room, throwing new clothes on and then running to the bathroom to brush your teeth and hair. You very quickly pull it back and then grab your coat and bag and head out.

Debating whether or not it would be quicker to walk or catch a cab. It’s only a couple of blocks away, and knowing noon traffic in New York, it probably has to be quicker to walk/run. 

Your phone starts ringing the moment you get into the elevator. When you pull it out of your bag, you see that your mom is calling. Knowing you’re about to get an earful for being late, you debate on sending it to voicemail and just texting her an apology. But then you’ll have to hear about that when you get there. So you answer.

“Hello, mother. I’m so sorry-”

“Should we just reschedule when it's convenient for you?” She snips.

“No, mom… I’m sorry, I just overslept is all…” 

“I’ve been sitting here for thirty minutes. There are people staring at me, probably thinking I’ve been stood up. By my own daughter, no less.”

You roll your eyes. “I didn’t stand you up, mother. I’m literally on my way.”

“How far away are you?” 

This angry, irritable version of your mother is completely different than the one who had been singing to you the last couple nights. If you weren’t used to it, perhaps you’d have whiplash. But nope, this has been your whole life.

“Maybe 10 minutes.” You tell her as you get out of the elevator and start walking out of your building. 

Cool air practically whips you in the face and brings tears to your eyes as you see there’s still lingering snow on the sidewalk. 

“Have a good day!” Your doorman, Frank, tells you.

“Thank you, Frank! You as well. Tell Marla I said hello!” You grin.

“Will do, sweetheart.” He kindly tips his hat toward you and you start practically sprinting down the street.

“Who’s Frank?” Your mother demands.

“My doorman.” 

“And Marla is?”

“Frank’s wife, mother.” 

“He seemed a little too friendly with you.”

“Oh good grief, mom… He’s been the doorman for my building for longer than I’ve been alive. His wife bakes me cakes for my birthday.” 

“Oh good, your father just got here.” She doesn’t even listen to you, which gives you a premonition on how lunch is going to go. “We’ll see you when you get here.” 

She hangs up on you and you shake your head, putting your phone back into your bag and then walking briskly the rest of the way there.

When the restaurant comes into sight, you see your mother and father in the corner window and start to wave, thinking they see you. Luckily the pedestrian sign turns green and you start booking it across the crosswalk.

Unfortunately, the last thing you hear is “LOOK OUT!” from someone behind you and when you turn to look, a car is speeding through their red light. 

And then you squeeze your eyes shut. 

You’re hyper aware of your shut eyes, of the darkness. Everything feels fuzzy. Are you breathing? You take a breath. It doesn’t feel quite necessary though… You need to wake up. You can tell that much. 

So wake up.

You open your eyes but it's immediately too bright. Like a bright white light.

Oh great… I’m dead. Wonderful… You think to yourself. What happened?

You rub your eyes until you can stand the light again, finding that you’re standing.

Weird, but okay. 

There’s a white end table that looks like the one beside your couch at your apartment. On it sits a single picture frame. You stare at it, inspecting the silver frame. It’s a picture of you, your mom, and your dad on your fifth birthday. You look genuinely happy and excited, smiling wildly at the large birthday cake in front of you lined with at least a hundred candles.

Who makes a little kid blow out a hundred candles? Your mother who had to make sure you had the best birthday in your entire pre-k class. 

Raising your hand to pick it up, something stops you. 

No… not something.

Someone. Someone’s deep, soothing voice. 

Rex. 

You’d know that voice literally anywhere. It sounds like he’s right next to you, and you can’t quite understand what he’s saying, but a deep ache fills your veins. You miss him terribly. 

You turn around to throw your arms around him, but find that you’re standing in a familiar, yet unfamiliar doorway. You’d recognize a medbay a mile away.

“Come back to me, cyar’ika…” Rex’s soft voice pleads. “There’s so much I need to say to you… so much I didn’t get to tell you.”

You look at your vitals up on the screen beside the bed you’re lying unconsciously in, confused. Did something happen here to you? You turn back around and no longer see the picture frame. 

Instead, you see yourself in a hospital bed, your parents next to you and then it all comes back to you.

The crosswalk… The car. 

You don’t understand… How are you looking at two versions of yourself? Where are you? Why are you seeing two versions of yourself?

But deep down, you think you know…

You have to choose right now. You don’t exactly know for sure what that entails. If you choose one, would you eventually be able to go back to the other? 

There’s only one way to find out, isn’t there?

You take one last look at your mother and father asleep in a couple chairs next to your hospital bed and then walk the other way. 

When you wake up, the lights are still a little bright. But you can see Rex’s face perfectly next to yours. 

“Rex.” You murmur, taking his hand.

His eyes widen with relief and he swiftly stands up, over you, hugging you to him. You can’t help the warmth that spreads from head to toe at the touch of this man as you notice that he’s not wearing his upper plastoid armor. His chest is so warm and firm that you can’t stop yourself from placing your hand over where his heart is and breathing in his familiar vanilla and warm ocean breeze scent. 

“What happened?” You ask, you look up at him.

He pulls away, slightly, his brows still furrowed with concern.

“Kix said that the two of you had a conversation and then you went to go find me… You passed out again. But this time, you weren’t waking up at all. And then you started to crash, but Kix got you stabilized. That was three days ago…” You can see that it's difficult for him to talk about it. 

It’s beyond clear to you that he really cares about you and you’d be lying if you said your entire heart doesn’t do a somersault at the realization. 

“I’m not going anywhere for a while now… okay?” You try to assure him.

“See… what does that mean?” He scoots down to the chair so he can fully look at you. 

“You’ll think I’m crazy if I tell you.” You murmur, noticing the way his thumb is brushing over your knuckles. 

It's almost intoxicating, the effect he has on you. An effect no man has ever had on you. 

“I could never think you’re crazy.” He flashes a soft, amused, smile and your chest tightens at the sight. 

And with a smile like that, how could you deny him? So, you tell him everything that you told Kix. Every detail, aside from the tv show bit. 

After a few moments, Rex lets out a breath. “Wow…”

You expect him to pull away, call you crazy, and leave. But he doesn’t. He continues brushing his thumb back and forth across your knuckles in an almost hypnotizing manner. 

“I know…” You murmur. “So, you don’t think I’m crazy?” 

He lets out a soft, amused snort. “We live in a world where a certain type of people have powers and run around with laser swords. I don’t think anything is outside the realm of possibility anymore.” 

A soft laugh escapes your lips. “Okay, good point.” 

It’s quiet for a moment before you look around and see that you’re in a medbay somewhere. 

“So, where are we?” You ask him.

“We’re back on the Jedi cruiser.” He looks toward the doors.

“And Umbara…?” 

“We won. Krell is imprisoned.” He smiles. 

“And Hardcase?” 

His soft smile widens a bit. “Hardcase is okay. He has a few burns and bruises, but he’s expected to make a full recovery.”

Relief floods your entire body. 

“And the 212th?” 

“All perfectly fine.” He promises you.

You let out a relieved sigh and close your eyes, bringing your hand to your chest. 

“You’re sweet to care so much, you know… It’s one of my favorite things about you.” He admits and your chest tightens. 

“Rex, I-” You smile, but are interrupted by Kix’s cheery voice.

“She’s alive!” Kix comes to your bedside, opposite his brother. 

“I’m alive.” You nod, a smile still on your lips. 

At least you think you’re alive. You’re still not quite sure, yet.

“The boys have been hounding me about seeing you. I told them not until you woke up and only if you felt like it. I can make them go away, just say the word.” Kix tells you. 

You let out a playful sigh. “Send ‘em in.” 

Kix nods with a playful smirk and turns to walk out.

“I’ll let you visit.” Rex tells you and you start to protest, not wanting him to go. “I’ll see you tonight, I promise.”

He smirks down at you as he brushes your hair off your forehead. And before you have time to process that, he kisses you on the forehead, making your eyes flutter closed for a moment.

A simple, yet meaningful enough gesture that your chest tightens. You’ll never forget it.

He throws you a quick wink and makes his way out of the medbay just as four large men in 501st blue armor come filing in, already rowdy and clearly excited to see you.

“Look at you!” Fives’ voice booms, making himself comfortable next to you as he slings an arm around the top of the bed. Hardcase and Tup sit on either side of your feet while Jesse stands at the foot of the bed, checking your chart on the data pad.

“How are you really?” Jesse asks you, concern laced in his tone.

“I’m fine.” You assure him, a wide grin unable to leave your lips.

You still can’t believe that this is your new life. 

“Thank the Maker.” Tup pats your foot. 

As you look around at the four men, you’re overcome with so many emotions and feelings, with acceptance and belonging coming in right at the top of the list. You feel like you’ve finally found a place you belong. 

But at what cost?

“How’s your head?” Hardcase asks you, grinning.

“I should be asking you that.” You smile as you take in his patches that are covering his burns. 

He chuckles. “My head is always loose, so nothing out of the ordinary here. In fact, I wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for you.” He pats your foot, appreciatively.

“Yeah, how did you know about the droid and the missile?” Jesse asks you.

You shrug, nonchalantly. “Just had a feeling.”

“Well, lucky for us that you had feelings.” Fives ruffles your head and Kix throws his hands up in the air with exasperation. 

“Be careful with her!” Kix tells him. “She’s gone through enough-”

“Aw, come on, Kix. She can handle a 501st boy, can’t ya?” Fives elbows you teasingly and you give him a playful glare, going absolutely warm in the face. 

“Alright. Visitation is over.” Kix starts to usher out his brothers. “She needs some rest.”

“Yeah, she does!” Fives grins. “Especially for later.”

Fire creeps into your cheeks with thoughts of a certain captain and his promise of tonight. “Later?” 

“Yeah, when we take ya to 79s to celebrate you not being dead.” Hardcase says, a little loudly.

79s. The clone bar. The bar you’ve thought about many times throughout your multiple watches, always wondering what it would be like to get to see the men you care about let loose after their endless days and nights on the battlefield. They deserve to have fun and be carefree, for however long that may be. 

“Is that okay Doctor Kix?” You smile.

How easy it is to tease and joke with him, as if you’d been friends for a lifetime and not just a mere few days. Now whether or not it has to do with the fact that you’ve watched the show countless times or because you’ve apparently had a whole life here before you “arrived”, you’re not sure. All you can do is go along for the ride, right? 

He rolls his eyes with his signature smirk. “Sure. As long as you get some rest now.” 

“You heard him, boys.” You shrug, teasingly. 

One by one, each man files out after giving you some sort of well wishes. It’s incredibly sweet how each man cares for you, making you feel like you truly belong. You never had this sort of connection with people in your other life. 

When they leave, you lay there for a while, listening to the low hum of the cruiser, still unable to believe that you’re actually here.

You’re in Star Wars… Wow.

The urge to get up and explore is strong. But you promised Kix that you would rest. And you can only assume you’ll be back on Coruscant soon, so there’s no point in upsetting him. 

But still… you’d be lying if you said a part of you wasn’t afraid to go to sleep here… Will you be transported back into your other life? Or perhaps worse?

You lay there for a while, staring up at the durasteel ceiling as Kix comes in with a data pad. 

“Oh, you’re awake.” He comes to the edge of the bed.

You sit up, crossing your legs. “I’m afraid to go to sleep.” 

He nods, understanding. He and Rex are the only ones who would. “I made up this data pad for you. Information about you before you kinda popped into your own life here. And, your bag of clothes. There should be some civies in there.” 

“Civies?”

“Non military clothes.” He chuckles.

He hands you the data pad and the bag, and you take them, touched at the gesture.

“Thank you, Kix. This means a lot.” 

“I just… I have one question.” He murmurs. “How do you know what’s going to happen? You never said.” 

You sigh, knowing you weren’t going to be able to avoid this question forever. “This is all a television show where I’m from.” 

“Television?” He looks confused.

“Um… I think they’d be called like holo-shows here?” You try to make him understand.

“Why would anyone want to watch a ‘show’ about us?” He laughs.

You laugh with him. “Lots of people do. Lots of people care about the clones in my reality.”

He sits next to you. “Thank you.” 

You nod and the both of you are quiet for a moment.

“Would you like a tour?” He grins.

“I thought you’d never ask.” You clap your hands together, excitedly. 

Kix lets you run to the bathroom, apparently they’re called freshers, so you can change. You put your bag up on the counter and look inside. Sure enough, there’s a couple pairs of nonmilitary clothes that are your size exactly. 

It still all feels… surreal. 

You try not to dwell on it too much, afraid that you could accidentally go into what Kix called a mental breakdown a few days ago.

A few days… that’s how long you’d been knocked out here. It had only felt like moments…

Snap out of it. Get dressed. Think about something else. Literally anything else. 

Rex comes to mind instantly. Someone who’s given you a sense of calmness in this massive storm. You can’t wait to see him again, you think to yourself as you get dressed and then exit the fresher, finding Kix looking down at his own datapad. 

“Ready.” You smile softly.

He looks up at you, his smile matching your own. “How do you feel?” 

“Better.” You nod. 

“Good. Come on.” He nods towards the door and you follow him out into the hall.

As you walk down the long halls of the cruiser, you can’t help but stare at almost everything in awe. Kix points out the barracks, the mess hall, and the other medbays.

“You know, it might help if you at least try to act like you’ve been here for the last couple years.” Kix teases. 

“I know, I know. It’s just… I’ve dreamt of this moment for… so long.” You confess. 

“So you were… what do they call them?” He snaps his fingers playfully. “A fan?” 

You playfully bump your shoulder into his. “Shut up.” 

“I would ask who’s your favorite but it’s pretty obvious.” He teases again.

“Yeah. Obviously Fives.” You shrug with a smirk as you look in each room in the hall. 

Kix laughs and then looks down the hall. You follow his gaze and see Rex, Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Ahsoka Tano coming this way toward you and it takes everything in you to keep it cool. 

You’d already seen Anakin the first day you were here, but now… it’s different. You know you’re not dreaming, and it feels more real.

It truly is like seeing a celebrity. You’ve looked up to these characters- people for so long. And now, here they are in front of you. Life truly did not prepare you for this moment. 

“Generals. Commander.” Kix nods. 

“Kix.” Anakin nods and then murmurs your name. “How are you feeling?” 

“Much better.” You nod. “Uh- General.”

Kix and Rex share a knowing smirk.

“We owe you a thanks for figuring out that Master Krell was working against us.” Obi-Wan tells you.

You nod again. “No problem.” 

“You know, you might be in the wrong profession.” Anakin chuckles.

“I agree, it seems like you could’ve made quite a career in espionage.” Obi-Wan compliments you with a half grin.

You laugh. “Well if there’s anything I can do for you… just let me know.”

“We will.” Obi-Wan nods and starts to walk away with Anakin.

Ahsoka gives you a wave and you wave back, still practically starstruck.

Rex stays behind and smiles down at you. 

“I’ll see you guys tonight at 79s.” Kix grins and walks away. 

For being told he was part of a tv show, he sure is handling the news well. Probably better than you would. 

“Hi.” You smile up at Rex. 

“Hey there.” He nods for you to follow him. “I want to show you something you’ve not seen yet… personally, at least.” 

“Lead the way.” You follow beside him, unable to hide your smile.

Does he know you’d follow him no matter what? You chose this life not only to help save this galaxy from Palpatine, but also for Rex.

“How are you feeling?” He asks, softly, glancing down at you as you walk.

“I’m feeling a lot better.” You promise him.

It’s true. You don’t feel exhausted for the first time in a really long time. You feel more awake. 

“I’m relieved to hear that.” He tells you. 

You don’t realize where he’s taking you until you get to the flight deck. You look at all of the starships, gunships, and walkers, still unable to believe your eyes. When you walk up to one of the walkers, you feel along the side of it, the cool durasteel making you smile. 

When you look back at Rex, he’s giving you an amused smile.

“What is it?” You ask, taking your hand away, self-consciously.

He shakes his head with a shrug. “You’re like a breath of fresh air.” 

“Was I not before?” You tease.

He immediately becomes flustered, trying to figure out what to say. 

“I’m just kidding.” You grin. 

Rex lets out a sigh of relief and nods for you to follow him. 

“This is what I wanted to show you.” He walks up to the ray shield and that’s when you see it. 

The dancing blue hues of hyperspace. Your lips part and a small gasp escapes as you grab onto Rex’s arm, unable to look away from it. You're feeling something so profound that words just can't convey. 

“Oh my god. It’s even better than I imagined it would be.” You think you practically have tears in your eyes. “It’s so beautiful.”

“Sure is.” Rex murmurs. 

Except he’s not looking up at the hyperspace lights. He’s only looking at you.

TAGS: @twistedstitcher27 @rebel-finn @rexandechosandwich @madameminor @dumfanting  @corona-one @tecker @ladykatakuri @brynhildrmimi @the-sith-in-the-sky-with-diamond @zoeykallus @maulslittlemeowmeow @littlemousedroid @arctrooper69 @rexxdjarin @padawancat97 @hated-by-me @sleepingsun501 @idledreams @redheadgirl @themcuwriter @ashotofspotchka @sunshinesdaydream @crosshairsimp73 @ariadnes-red-thread @rosmariner @heyitsaloy @starstofillmydream @high-ct5555 @echos-girlfriend @sleepywych @nekotaetae @justanothersadperson93 @aconstructofamind @book-of-baba-fett @chopper-base @palliateclaw @501st-rexster @dead-poolz @nahoney22 @where-is-my-mind-tho @jediknightjana @erishimoon @witching3 @queen-of-many-fandoms @wizardofrozz  @burningfieldof-clover @rebelsriley

[itsnothingofinterest]

You know I'm seeing some people try and say Tomura is becoming like Kotaro after those panels last chapter and now again in 417, like he's become the very thing he hates, and...I'm sorry, but that's some bullshit. They may both be 'bad men' but they are distinct in their personal badness as Overhaul and Redestro, maybe moreso actually.

And the claims towards what their similarities are just seem almost silly to me.

'They're both spreading misery' well sure in a really vague way that could also apply to All Might, Deku, and literally every hero and villain in this series and a lot of the rest of the cast, I guess that's a similarity they share. But I personally feel comparing authoritative domestic abuse and anarchistic super-villainy is a bit of a stretch; it’s why we always considered AFO and Overhaul to be distinct from (and usually worse than) the League proper.

'Tomura's getting Tenko hurt just like Korato by not letting Deku save him' …No? This is a memory guys; Tenko was hurt by Kotaro. It looks to me like Tomura simply doesn't want Deku interfering with his mind (or maybe even attacking his innermost self, as the vestiges have suggested a few times now) but that might just be my read. Because like; Deku came here to figure out his past, here it is being shown to him. Something I find pretty fitting; this whole time Deku's been acting like he's gotta fight so hard to figure out his deal but Tomura's never been shy about sharing his motivations. What more could Deku want seeing this, and is that 'more' not inevitably overstepping and an attempt to alter Tomura's mind? It's not like Tomura has reason to trust this hero's good intentions, so I think it only makes sense for him to let Deku look but not touch. But yeah, If these images are upsetting to see happen; well Deku went digging for them for exactly that reason.

I mean I have even seen it suggested that Tomura is to blame for putting inner Tenko through like this because he's playing his suffering on loop in his mind and...weird Tenko vs Tomura framing aside...what proof is there that a) this is happening all the time in his head rather than this memory replaying because Deku dug for it, and b) if it is on loop; that it is unique for that? Do we have solid reason to believe Deku's memory of being told he can't be a hero isn't on loop in his own heart as well? Maybe every memory is on loop, or maybe this and every other memory is only replayed when it’s remembered; either way we’ve to proof this memory is unique for any of this. It's just such a weird argument I've seen made to suggest Tomura is uniquely wrong for being motivated by his past. In a series that can feel like it loves flashbacks almost as much as Naruto.

Anyway my point is; just because Tomura's a villain who isn't playing ball with Deku's attempts at messing with his core, that doesn't make him his father the domestic abuser. Tenko & Kotaro kind of have their dislike of heroes for their irresponsibility in common (Tomura even famously borrowed his dad's line on that) but that's pretty much it I think, and even then Tomura's hate is broader. I know the typical trope is for the well-intentioned-extremist-type villains to become the very thing they hate; but I just can't see much of that here.

[nemoys]

a very long messy review of link click (season 2)

alright so reading through a bunch of (mostly negative) reviews of the season thus far i've come to my own conclusions over how this season felt, and i really feel like addressing them since i personally feel like it deserves recognition (and rightful criticism) within certain aspects. really interested in everyone's takes so lmk whatever you think about all these aspects i'm about to gloss over.

NOTE ; i'm not going to be talking about the art direction or OSTs . i believe those have been nothing short of phenomenal and i feel like we can all universally agree over that

1) tonal shift : from a more emotionally driven s1, coupled with sprinkles of slice of life moments, we turn to a mostly thriller/mystery plot line. personally, i've always seen this coming. the tonal shift really didn't take me by surprise. with the lg stabbing at the end of season 1 it almost seemed inevitable that the more light hearted aspects of the first season weren't going to happen. more importantly, it was very clear that there was always a higher presence to fight. link click was always meant to be a thriller, this was always the plan, and so i suppose logically i assumed the second season would follow that path. i understand how people might've felt disappointed, or 'robbed', but i don't think the shift was all that shocking quite honestly, it was always set up. link click was never light hearted, even at s1.

the more shocking shift has to be the shift from an emotional, to suspenseful change in writing. the emotional writing in link click has always been the best part of the show and that hasn't changed, the emotionally driven plot lines of s2 (chen bin, ltc/ltx) have been written very well. the suspenseful writing also works. replaces the tear jerkers with an unsettling anxiety, and it's executed relatively well. you can clearly tell that the crew's been experimenting quite a lot with this season, and yes, that's usually what season 2 is for.

2) pacing : now i totally get the criticism in this aspect. in my opinion, the weakest part of s2's been the pacing. with overly drawn out fight scenes, and unnecessarily long recaps, i think the issue has to do with the fact that lc just has a LOT to address, and so it makes us feel less inclined to sit through longer scenes that don't directly advance the plot.

obviously i get that the fight scenes show off a lot of the animation budget #tm and they do look great but the fact that we had way too much time dedicated to a five minute long fighting cutscene in the FIRST episode just made me feel impatient.

3) red herring endings: alright this might be an unorthodox opinion but, aren't red herring cliff hangers a norm in general with these kinds of shows lol. idk i've come to expect the total opposite every time so it doesn't really bother me i guess i'm just used to the medium. not really a lc problem it's a story telling problem in general but that's just marketing i don't know what else to say.

it'd be nice if they followed through but some part of me thinks they're pulling a whole boy who cried wolf situation, eventually they'll pull the trigger when we don't really expect it.

4) shipping/ main trio reconciliations : it's a really serious ongoing situation. i kind of get why the main trio/shiguang don't get a chance to talk things over amongst themselves, it just isn't the time. keep in mind everything that's happening rn is happening continuously, there are no gaps within the days or anything, kind of makes sense that they don't really talk about it. they probably will get to once it's all over, which might be well into s3. again, this was always meant to be a thriller more than it was trio focused. also idk about you guys but i think we actually did get a lot of sweet moments within the trio, cxs and lg, even the sibling dynamic with ql and cxs were really lovely this season.

5) the women: okay i REALLY don't understand the problem here. the women are written well. ql is written FANTASTICALLY and all side characters like ltx and that one red eyed lady i'm forgetting the name of were great too. hell even chen bin's wife was great. i think for a donghua/anime where women are usually given dirt in terms of actually strong writing, lc has always been very solid. their lives do not revolve around the men in the show it just happens to be that men are a part of their lives. they have very distinct personalities and aren't treated like weird objects to gaze at (what a bar lol) but yes i do think the women are written quite dimensionally.

6) unanswered questions : when have linear shows ever answered questions (especially mc based) in season 2?? when has season 2 EVER tied loose ends? when it comes to linear television, season 2's purpose almost always build towards a greater evil/climax. there's a reason why season 2 hasn't answered questions we've had, season 2s in most shows rarely ever do. from what i can tell, with a confirmed s3, i've always expected s2 to simply do its job as a second season and further raise stakes and raise even more questions. i do get the frustration, i get the lack of any backstory, but i want to refrain from making any actual comments over that till every episode's aired ahah, however, im not too mad at it. i just think this show's ride is currently still at an increasing accelerated pace (guys i'm sorry i study physics), things will only be explained once we've once hit the climactic point or go downhill right after. time will tell i guess

Conclusion

overall, i think this season was actually pretty solid. s1 set a very unrealistically high bar, as s1 in my opinion is one of the best seasons in television period. but s2 and s1 shouldn't be compared in the same way, their tone is quite different, and needs to be analysed individually instead. i'll make a complete review once the season is over, but honestly i've come to enjoy the season most when i stop expecting too much out of it. i think people had way too many things they've expected from s2, that were bound to simply never happen.

that said, i do hope the crew takes the valid criticism regarding the pacing (and ig the character focus?) into consideration and implements it well into s3. it's worth noting that i believe nothing was meant to be complete with s2 in the first place.

i've really enjoyed this season, and i'm beyond ecstatic to rewatch it all once it's done airing, in order to properly take it all in. it's had its flaws, more than s1 has had (let's be real s1 had little to none). but that's bound to happen to shows when they head down their linear routes. currently sitting at a 7/10

[my-moony-and-padfoot]

We should talk

Starchaser :)

Word count: 2 300

TW: Nothing much? It's a bit angsty and they talk about the dark mark so I guess if you don't wanna read that then don't

He watched as James' eyes slowly filled with tears, his gaze flicking between his eyes and arm, then he closed them, but still; he didn't say anything. And Regulus felt he might suffocate if he didn't hear him speak soon, he needed to hear something, just something, he wanted to hear his voice. Needed to. James took a deep shaky breath in, and let it slowly out as he leaned his head on his hands, opening his eyes and looking back at Regulus who was still standing in front of him.

“Say something.” He whispered, almost wanting to take a step back at the look he got from James, then he looked back down at the mark on his arm, taking another deep breath. “Anything, James. Please.”

“I got nothing to say.” His voice sounded oddly calm, and Regulus was taken by surprise. He looked angry and disappointed and betrayed, but so calm at the same time. “Absolutely nothing.”

He nodded to himself, starting to feel uncomfortable under his gaze, like he was slowly being studied inch by inch. Like all his secrets were revealed, which they pretty much were, but he felt so bare, and like James was staring straight into his soul, tearing it up into pieces. He rolled down his sleeves, folding his arms on his chest, looking down.

“I can't believe you.” He whispered after a while. “How can you-?” He trailed off, like he was unable to say the words, he just closed his eyes again, trying his best to stop the tears from falling.

“No-no you don't understand, I didn't want to. James I promise it's not-” he said quickly, needing James to believe him. “It's not what it looks like, I swear, it's not.”

“Am I supposed to believe that?”

“James, I didn't want this. I've told you, haven't I? How they were going to- you know there's no saying no to them, they do what they want. You know that.” He said. “Seriously, I didn't want it, never. If it were up to me, I'd never. But you know-”

“Stop telling me what I know.” He said, finally looking Regulus in the eyes, he looked sad, and betrayed. “Just go away.”

His eyes widened. “Jamie -”

“Don't fucking call me that.” He interrupted, and Regulus took a step back again. He had never heard James being so angry, he had never seen him like this, and it felt like a stab straight into his heart. “Go away Regulus. I- I need to think.”

“I'm sorry.” He whispered before turning around and slipping out of James' dorm room, quickly making his way out of the Gryffindor tower not stopping when his name was called. It was Sirius. He made his way down to his own common room, this time stopping when his name was called, he turned to look at the sofa where Barty and Evan were, both looking at him worriedly.

“Everything alright, Reggie?” He nodded, managing a small smile. “You sure? You don't -”

“Everything's good.” He said, disappearing into his dorm, not bothering to listen to what else they had to say. Once the door was closed he basically fell on the floor, his back against the door, pulling his knees up to his chest.

This was never supposed to happen. Never. He had never wanted to take the mark, and that's what he wanted to explain, and he needed for James to listen, but he hadn't, he didn't get a chance to explain himself. Though he was sure it would do nothing, there was no way he was going to get out of this mess.

He didn't want to lose James, he just couldn't but that just seemed inevitable, James would hate him. He had every right to, of course he did, he had done something horrible, something unforgivable, but maybe this was better than lying to him. Maybe it was for the better, though he wasn't sure for who, but maybe it was.

Regulus heard knocks on his door and someone calling his name, but he just held his hands over his ears, hoping they'd stop soon. He didn't want to talk, or see other people. He just wanted to be alone, maybe forever. He could only hope it wasn't over with them, or that he hadn't completely ruined everything, but he was sure he had. It wasn't his fault, he knew that. But it felt like it.

He hoped he had been able to resist his parents, that he could tell them no. That he could've done the same thing Sirius had done and just left. But he felt like he couldn't do that, like he was tied down, tied down to that house, their bloodline, their beliefs, and their ideas. He knew it wasn't right, that it wasn't something he believed in and wanted to follow, but like he was made to. Which he was.

He had tried to forget the night he had gotten the mark, he had tried to fight them forever, that he didn't want to. But they made it happen anyway. He did not have a choice, of course he didn't. He wished, more than anything, that he could've done something differently, fought harder and been braver so he could've just left it all behind.

…

He didn't sleep well. He just lied there staring at the ceiling, horrible thoughts plaguing his mind. If he fell asleep, he woke up a few hours later to a nightmare, unable and unwilling to fall back to sleep. He couldn't even focus on reading to make the early hours go by quicker, he'd just have to lay there, getting lost in his thoughts. Maybe that was fair?

Regulus avoided being outside of his dorm, he didn't want to see all those people. Especially not James, it hurt him so much every time he even caught a glance of the boy, he just couldn't face it. He didn't want to see Sirius either, every time he saw his brother in the corridors, he always looked so irritated with him. So, he just quickly ran to his classes and back to his dorm, only going to the great hall when his friends forced him to.

There was no one bothering him outside or in the more abandoned parts of the castle, so he often went to those places during nights and early mornings. He could be alone in peace, even the thoughts seemed to leave him be for a moment. Usually, it was the astronomy tower, he could look over the grounds and look at the stars on clear nights. But sometimes he wandered down to the edge of the forbidden forest, trying to distract himself with something to do.

After another sleepless night, he slowly got up from bed and made his way down to the quidditch pitch for an early morning practice. He wasn't really feeling like playing, but he was the only seeker they had so he did it anyway.

Towards the end of practice he almost fell off of his broom when he saw James sitting in the stands. He wasn't in his gear nor did he have his broom with him, so he couldn't be waiting for Gryffindor's practice to start. But he wasn't really looking at their team either, focusing on something else, though Regulus was too far away to actually see.

He was glad practice ended soon, and he couldn't stop thinking about the fact that James was sitting in the stands as he took a quick shower and changed out of his quidditch gear. It made him anxious, he wanted to talk, but he didn't want to be yelled at or for James to get mad at him. He just hoped that James wasn't here to tell him he wanted nothing to do with him anymore, that their relationship would be over. It was the last thing he wanted. When everyone had left, and he made his way up to the stands hoping James was still there.

“Hey,” He whispered when he made his way over, James looked up, smiling slightly as he closed the journal that was on his lap. He leaned against the railing, crossing his arms at his chest, letting his broom lean against the bench. “Why are you here?” He asked quietly, looking around, trying to avoid eye contact with him.

“I thought we should talk.” James looked hurt, just like he had on that night a few weeks ago. He looked hurt and tired, and he could just hope James wouldn't get mad at him. He had every right to, but Regulus just hoped it wouldn't happen. “This is the only place I thought I could find you.”

He smiled momentarily. “We don't have to talk if you don't want to.”

“I know,” James whispered. “But I want to. If you do too.” Regulus nodded. “What happened? Like what actually happened?” He asked quietly, looking at him.

“T-they made me get the- the um mark.” He said, hugging himself tighter as he looked down. “I didn't want to, but they- you can't say no to them. I promise I didn't want it…” James just nodded as Regulus took a break to wipe his eyes. “I don't believe in that shit, they're just horrible and I couldn't say no. But I promise I- James I didn't want it. I'd never. I'm sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?”

“Everything.” He whispered brokenly, more tears falling down as he looked away, trying to take a deep breath, letting out a quiet sob when James wrapped his arms around him. “I'm so s-sorry.”

“Shh, don't be sorry. It's okay.” Regulus nodded, hesitantly wrapping his arms around James' neck, hoping he wouldn't leave. “I’m sorry for not believing you.” He whispered, voice wavering with tears. “I've missed you so much.”

“I missed you too.” He said, looking up at him. James smiled even though there were tears in his eyes, Regulus reached to wipe them away with his sleeve when they fell down. “So much.”

He rose up to his tiptoes, looking him in the eyes, James gave him the smallest of nods, and closed the short distance between them; kissing him softly. It was short, but it meant so much. Everything would be okay. When they pulled away, Regulus wrapped his arms back around his neck, hiding his face back to his chest. James held him close in return, burying his face into Regulus' hair, breathing in the comforting scent.

“Why aren't you mad at me?” He asked quietly after a moment of silence, pressing himself closer as if to make sure James wouldn’t leave. “You should be…”

“But I'm not.” James whispered softly, rubbing his back to try to comfort him the best he could. “I hope you're not mad at me either.” Regulus shook his head quickly, mumbling something quietly though James didn't really catch what it was. “Let's talk later, yeah? Just wanna be with you.”

“Want to be with you too.” Regulus smiled, lifting his head to look up at him. “I'm so tired.”

“Have you slept?” Regulus shook his head. “Me neither.” He whispered, rubbing his side gently. “My dorm is empty, wanna go there, sleep a little?”

“Yeah.” He nodded, pulling away from James' hold to look at him better. “It's fucking freezing out here.”

James laughed, taking Regulus' hand into his before starting to walk towards the castle. “How did you know where I was?” He asked after a moment of walking in silence.

“I just looked at the schedule.” He smiled, and Regulus hummed. “And, you hardly ever skip practice, so it's not too hard to find you.”

“I didn't wanna go today.”

“I'm glad you did though.” James whispered, smiling as Regulus glanced at him. “Why didn't you want to go?”

“Didn't feel like it.” He whispered. “But I'm the only seeker we have, the back-up broke her leg or something I- gotta do it.”

“Why don't you wanna play?”

“I'm just tired.” He whispered, glancing at James who nodded as the walked through the castle doors, starting to walk up to James' dorm. “Also, our captain changed and he fucking sucks.”

“Yeah, I heard.”

They fell silent after that, but it wasn't an uncomfortable one, they just were silent for the rest of the walk. It felt nice to finally be with each other, even a simple gesture like holding hands made both of them feel so much better, and cared for. Everything would be okay in the end, they'd be okay.

“I’m so tired.” Regulus complained as they climbed into bed, and he could cuddle up with him. He rested his head on James' chest curling up against his side with one of his legs thrown over James' while he pulled the blanket over them, wrapping his arms around Regulus. “Are you comfortable?”

“Always with you.” He smiled, kissing his head, laughing quietly as Regulus hit his arm. “Yeah, I'm comfortable, don't worry.”

“Good, ‘cause I'm not moving.”

“Don't have to.” He whispered, starting to play with his hair. He felt better than he had in weeks, he felt safe and comforted in James' warm embrace. He had really missed this, missed the feeling of being close to him, of feeling loved. James felt it too, it felt like he could finally sleep in peace, with no worries or fears. He could be sure that Regulus wouldn't disappear, he'd still be there when they'd wake up, he'd still be there, laying in his arms, curls messily spread on his chest. “Reggie?”

“Mhm?”

“I love you.” James whispered softly, watching as Regulus lifted his head to look at him, smiling sleepily as he leaned in to give him a kiss.

“I love you too.” He whispered against his lips, giving him another kiss before laying his head back down. “Now, shut up, I wanna sleep.” James laughed, kissing his head before taking off his glasses and laying his head more comfortable on the pillow. They started to slowly drift off to sleep, both feeling happy and safe to finally be in each other's arms.

A/N:

Hellooo, hope you're well and liked this little thing, I finally got a starchaser fic written and it was so fun to write them for a change. I should probably do it more

I feel like James could not stand seeing Regulus cry, it would just break something inside him, y'know? No that's not a reason to leave out the majority of the conversation that I don't wanna write. I swear it's not

Anyway, I hoped you liked it and found it even somewhat enjoyable to read. See you around maybe somewhere sometime? Have a good the rest of your day/night/morning :)

<3

[seongminiz]

hello my luv!! ngl i was laughing my ass off when i found out seongmin had beat taeyoung’s horse cock allegations😭😭 but like picture this.. you’re taeyoung’s best friend who came along that exact video and decided to tease him over it when he came for movie night.

“better shut your mouth before i shove it in to shut it for you”

also would it be alright if i could become 🫙 anon? much love to youu🤍🤍🤍

(not me turning this into a whole ass fic help)(n ofc u can be 🫙 anon !!)

review : ★★☆☆☆ , not that big tbh

minors dni ; ~1.7k words

warnings not proof read its like 3am i'll fix this in the morning , dom taeyoung , bratty reader , rlly lighthearted unserious n kinda fluffy , oral (m rec) , unprotected sex :3 (its not a jo seongminiz fic without it tbh) , creampie , big dick taeyoung :') , bulge kink n a little of size kink ig ? idk taeyoung refers to reader as tiny in one instance , liiittle bit of dumbification , i used the words cock n dick so much in this they dont even feel like real words anymore send help , some of the dialog is kinda cringe sawrry abt that , the whole smut part is cringe tbh im going to set myself on fire how am i a smut writer that doesn't know how to write smut

note no bc the way they were talking abt cock n balls on national television like CAN WE HAVE SOME DECORUM PLS anyways ! THE WRITERS BLOCK HAS BEEN CURED Y'ALL cant believe it took taeyoung having a small dick to fix this i love ur brain anon bc like .. YES . i can picture this so well . n i am NAWT letting the taeyoung monster cock agenda go no matter what seongmin says ik hes lyingggg

deep down u know what seongmin said was nothing more than a joke with barely any truth to it. it's not like you're unfamiliar with taeyoung's size, having your fair experience of accidentally rubbing ur ass against him while you were cuddling one too many times and causing some awfully awkward accidents because of it.

still, teasing taeyoung is wayyy more fun than acknowledging any of that. and for once, actually grinding down on him to get a reaction while you're cuddled up on your couch, watching a shitty movie you picked randomly, is fun too.

you can clearly feel taeyoung's bulge growing, just as you can feel him trying to move behind you to make it a little better (and ultimately making it worse each time), and you can hear the way his breath gets heavier by the minute, trying to stifle a few whines here and there you want to hear more of so badly.

when you 'innocently' grind against him once more under the pretense of stretching, taeyoung's last weak bit of restraint is gone. he groans, a hand firmly gripping your hips to hold you in place and finally stop your cruel shenanigans.

'can you stop that?' taeyoung asks, voice strained. 'stop what?' you look behind you and up at him, eyes wide in the fakest innocent expression you can come up with.

'you know what i'm talking about, you're...' he sits up, finally freeing himself from the close contact with you and quickly grabbing a pillow to hide his boner. you smirk to yourself, shaking your head as you sit up too. 'you're making me hard...' he finally says, lowering his voice so you can barely hear him over the movie playing.

'oh!' your expressions shifts to one of even faker concern, pouting a little. 'sorry about that. i didn't really feel anything, though, that's why i didn't notice...' you both know your explanation is bullshit. taeyoung knows that, he's sure of it even as you whisper something along the lines of 'i guess seongmin was right about it not being that big.'

still, he somehow finds himself trying to desperately defend his pride, barely managing to stutter out something about seongmin being a liar and how you both know you're just playing along with that whole bit for shits and giggles.

'am i?' you tilt your head to the side, keeping up your act as well as you can until the inevitable happens. 'you know, i've never really seen it, so how would i know? i guess until i do, i'll just have to trust seongmin on his word...'

for the first time that night, taeyoung actually laughs. 'if you wanted to see my dick that bad, you should've just asked,' he moves the pillow away, and you can finally shamelessly stare at his very obvious bulge as much as you want. taeyoung takes his sweet time with it , undoing the strings of his sweatpants and hooking his thumbs in the waistband before looking up at you, taking in your shocked expression and the way you're basically hypnotized by the sight of his still clothed cock.

because holy shit. you knew seongmin was just messing with him when he made that joke, you knew he was somewhat big, but this?

'this is a fucking monster cock what the fuck?'

the words leave your mouth before you can properly process them and, at the same time, with a quick motion taeyoung gets rid of both his sweatpants and boxers at once, finally snapping you out of your dick-induced trance.

just to have you plummet into an even worse one, probably. because not only is taeyoung's dick enormous, it also looks pretty as fuck.

'told you so,' he simply says, one of his hands gently lifting your chin so you can face him, his demeanor suddenly more serious. 'you're still okay with this, right?'

'of course,' you manage to say, breaking the heavy eye contact for a split second to steal yet another glance at taeyoung's dick. despite your voice shaking, and your actions not matching your words, you try to once again keep up that same act that brought you exactly where you are right now. 'plus, i was right, it's not even that big.'

'oh, really?' taeyoung's hand leaves your face and slides down to your shoulder, a silent command you follow with no objections, sliding off the couch and to your knees on the cold floor beneath you, right between his legs.

and face to face with his cock.

'let's hope it's at least big enough to shut you up, then,' taeyoung runs his hand through your hair, firmly gripping it 'maybe you'll be able to put your moth to good use for once.'

at that moment, you genuinely wish taeyoung was smaller. because no matter how hard you try, you can't seem to be able to take all of him in your mouth, using your hand to cover the part you can't reach.

truth is, taeyoung isn't as relaxed as he would want to be either. the simple fact you can't take all of him is enough to rile him up even more, fighting the urge to just take charge and fuck your mouth like he really wants to.

'so much for it not being that big, huh?' his words come out weak, broken by small moans and whimpers in between them.

of course you don't- you can't reply to taeyoung's taunts, at least verbally, so you opt for trying to take him deeper. the action makes you gag, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat. taeyoung almost cums right then and there, his resolve slowly crumbling and breaking down as he pulls you off of him.

after all, he has greater plans than just cumming down your throat. and if the way you whimper and rub your thighs together once he leaves your mouth empty is anything to go by, you do too.

taeyoung gently helps you up and back on the couch. his lips are immediately on yours, pulling you into a heated makeout as he gets rid of your shorts and underwear, sliding one hand between your legs to be met with your soaked cunt. you whine into the kiss, pulling away from him and grabbing on his wrist.

'don't tease me,' you complain. taeyoung wants to laugh at you. after all you've done and said, you are the one who doesn't want to be teased? if that's what you want, though...

'right, you said it's not that big anyways, you should be able to take it right away, no?'

or maybe you can't, but at this moment you'd rather die impaled on your best friend's cock than admit you were wrong, even when all the evidence - especially your own lived one - points to your defeat.

what taeyoung didn't expect you to do was actually agree. you desperately nod, hand still wrapped around his wrist 'i can take it, please.'

you definitely can't.

that's what you realize as taeyoung starts to push the head of his cock inside you and your eyes immediately fill with tears.

'fuck... you're so-'

'i'm not the problem here, you're just fucking big.' you cut him off. your head is spinning and, despite the pain, you can't deny how good you actually feel. how full you are, even as you look down and realize he's barely halfway inside of you.

you close your eyes, squeezing taeyoungs's hand. when did you even start holding it? you don't remember, probably somewhere between when you yelled at him to 'fucking slow down' and when you threatened to 'cut your dick off if you dare to cum before you're all the way in'.

luckily for taeyoung, your threats will have to wait and his cock - a national treasure at this point - will live to see another day.

now that he's fully buried inside your cunt, you can finally adjust to his size, slowly relaxing until it doesn't hurt (that much) anymore. 'you can move,' you say after a while, your hips bucking up in encouragement as taeyoungs's grip on your sides tightens.

'fucking finally, i thought i was going to die before i got to properly fuck you,' his joke and your laugh to it are short lived, cut off by the both of you moaning in unison as he starts picking up his face.

you're so overwhelmed, you can feel taeyoung everywhere inside you, so deep you're pretty sure you should be dead at this point. you're grateful you're not, though, you're pretty sure if you were you wouldn't be able to feel the way the tip of his cock relentlessly bullies your sweet spot, paired with his fingers right on your clit and...

'fuck look at this,' you whine when the stimulation on your clit subsides, but your disappointment doesn't last long, taeyoung places that same hand on your lower stomach, pressing on the very evident bulge formed by taeyoungs's cock ramming inside you.

'but it's not that big right? fuck... maybe you're right, i might not be that big, maybe you're just too tiny for me.'

you moan at taeyoung's words, too far gone to properly process them as you mindlessly nod. 'aw, did i fuck you too dumb? can't think properly when i'm fucking you this good?' he coos at you, and you can't do anything but nod again.

'so full... going to cum,' you can barely speak before you're clenching down even more on his cock, cumming with no further warning.

if taeyoung wasn't about to cum before, he definitely is now, his hips picking up the pace even more as he helps you ride through your high and starts to overstimulate you chasing his own.

his dick twitches inside of you, and you swear you couldn't almost cum again just from that, as his hips stutter and finally slow down, his cum filling you up.

you're both panting, trying to recover from probably the most mind blowing highs of your life.

when you make eye contact with taeyoung, he starts laughing again.

'what?' you ask.

'so? did i change your mind?'

you shrug, suppressing your own laugh 'eh, not really... it wasn't that big to be honest'

:3 thats it bye omg shitty ending everybody say thank u jo seongminiz

[amidstnamjin-and-binchanlix]

fight off the light tonight and just stay with me (honey, don't you leave) || ot7

Warnings: a teeny tiny bit of blood, mentions of hospitals and surgery, heavy angst(?)

I won't control you, but MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. This is not for you, please.

Pairings: OT7/(F) Reader, Jackson Wang/(F) Reader

Plot: Will it be too late for them to try and make things right?

Genre: not really unrequited love (but they're all idiots), mutual pining, angst, denial of feelings, poly ot7

Did you ever love her? Do you know?

Or did you never want to be alone?

And she was singing "Baby, come home."

"Baby, come home."

I've got those jet pack blues

Fight off the light tonight and just stay with me;

Honey, don't you leave.

mixtape: all i have left to give - part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - ending 1

thank you so much because this fic was my first one to reach more than 10 kudos in ao3 and some peeps liked the first part enough to reblog to want to read the next part you don't know how much it means to me :o oh my fucking god how did that happen??? thank you so friggin much!!!

sorry if my summaries are all song lyrics owo i just love taking inspiration from them when i write because i can't find the old me who can write and word vomit in a drop of a hat huahuahauhauhauahuahauaau am sorry my bad

bit of warning for some teeny tiny blood and hospitals but no one will die, i promise! i mean not yet, so far i haven't thought that far yet.

also!!!! i'm not a medical expert so please let me know if there are inaccuracies because there are bound to be, no matter how much research i do or how much i ask from doctor frens hueheuheuuefhiuf

title from Jet Pack Blues by Fall Out Boy because fuck yeah i wouldn't get them as a first tattoo if i didn't love them so much

hope i don't disappoint! if i do, i'm so sorry hahahuhu my mom always told me i'm a disappointment so there's kinda nothing new

hope i can write the next parts soon T_T

❤️‍🩹

You can feel the string in your chest slowly fraying.

You never thought that is possible. After all, the strings are connected to the soul and can never be seen. However, when you started the therapy, you started feeling it fray. Slowly and painfully. You don't know how and why, you just do.

Your symptoms are worsening, too. Doctor Im advised you against overworking and stressing yourself but how can you not? It feels like no matter what you do or where you turn, the boys are there. Your only escape is your work and in your line of work, stress is inevitable, so you have no choice but to endure it. At least at work, you are in control. At least at work, you don't have to think about being unwanted—your clients are the ones who request your services, after all.

You don't know what to feel, really. It feels like fate is pushing you to your limits and wants to see you suffer.

Look, even you can admit to yourself that there's no need to undergo the therapy. Your soulmates can go get fucked and feel your pain through the bond.

But you can't have that, can you?

You're not one to lie to yourself, you know why you feel this way. Aside from the fact that fate (unfortunately) assigned you seven soulmates who can give less of a fuck about you, you know deep down that you want to be with them and not just because your souls were linked to each other.

You're in with love them, period.

You've seen them through their bests and their worsts, and you're still hopelessly in love with them. You've seen their sides that they never dare show you, the beauty they unfairly grant other people but not you. You've also seen their worst, the ugliness seemingly reserved for you alone, but the longing is still there.

You can't help it, and you're sadly fucked no matter how you look at it. 

As you massage your perpetually aching chest, you also think how your dignity and pride are the only ones you have left. While it might be a rush of satisfaction to see them squirm, it is at the cost of your pride. You learned early on in life that you can never show your emotions—most especially your weakness—with how many times people fucked you over by using them against you.

In this case, you have to endure every pain to save face. So if it helps everyone sleep at night, then you'll give them what they want. If they don't want you, then you'll just have to remove yourself from the equation altogether. Simple math.

You snort. You're being too dramatic. You're used to this, you tell yourself. From your mother to the few lovers you had; there was always something wrong with you, something lacking. You're never needed in your whole life, so it was easy for them to leave you. It was always the easiest choice to not choose you. Why are you crying about it now?

You shake your head with a resigned sigh. There's no use regretting this. You swore to yourself you would stop regretting things you do and now is the time to stand by it. For yourself, and for the inner child in you who did nothing but run after people who turned their backs on her.

You try to stave off the pounding behind your temples by rubbing your eyes with your palms. While you are thankful that the meds seem to be working and the boys can't feel any input of emotions from you through your bond, the medicines and treatments are such pains in the ass. Fucking side effects.

Speaking of side effects, Doctor Im told you that one side effect would be them not feeling any of the emotions you feel, but you would still feel theirs, the latter possibly more potently than normal. You tried to test the emotion theory before, afraid that it will fail and the meds won't work. This is your only chance at walking away with your precious pride intact, so this should work. This has to work.

"It might take a while, but your emotions shouldn't reach through their strings anymore once you continuously undergo the whole therapy process," Doctor Im had said.

"You would still feel theirs, unfortunately." He looks at you tenderly, albeit with not an ounce of pity. That's okay, you don't want anyone's pity. "You'll be more attuned to them than a normal person is to their soulmate because your soul will be tender from all the treatments."

Doctor Im Jiho is kind, a little young for his profession if you say so yourself, but he is brilliant. It's what made you trust him. Even if the therapy is still not ratified and recognized legally, and still in its human trial stages, something about how passionately Doctor Im explained the whole therapy process and what it entails just screamed 'I know what the fuck I am doing'.

Or he should. Please let it be true, or you'll just rip your lungs out of your ribs and unalive yourself. So far though, Doctor Im and his team delivered.

Back to the emotion theory you have.

You wanted to see if the therapy works. Since soulmates can feel each others' extreme emotions, going through soul-scraping therapy shouldn't send any of yours to their end of the bond. To be sure, you waited a month into the treatments to start with the observation.

Since you've been keeping your distance and you cannot see it for yourself, you asked for help from Ae-cha and their other managers, most especially Kyunghee. They understood and agreed with no questions asked, and for that, you are eternally grateful.

You asked them for even the slightest changes in the boys' behavior during times when you know your emotions were at high. So far, there were none. It's either the meds are really working or they are just good at masking it. The second would be implausible, knowing how anything related to you would be a nuisance for them. They would make their displeasure known about it, you're sure.

Sejin, however, you're not sure you can face his pitying eyes again, so you never asked him. You don't want to hear the pitying tone in his voice one more time either. Once is more than enough to last for your lifetime.

You are just about to reach for the medicine bottle when you feel your eyeballs twitch rapidly from behind your eyelids and the pounding in your temples grow louder.

God, not now. You still have that meeting set with your lawyers. Not now.

You dial your assistant's number shakily.

"Joy, can you please phone Attorney Shin for me?" You say to the phone through your coughs, the air in your chest feels like slowly being squeezed out of you.

"Are you okay, [Name]?" Comes your assistant's concerned voice through the phone speaker. "Do you want me to call Doctor Im?"

You take the glass of water on your table with shaking hands. "I'm okay. I'm okay." You take big gulps of water, but the feeling doesn't pass. "There's no need."

Joy ignores the last part. "I'm going there, wait for me."

You go to tell her not to bother, but she hangs up before you can. A few minutes later, Joy comes through the door slightly panting.

"[Name]!" Joy takes hurried steps toward you, but you weakly wave her off. "You look like death. Jeez, I'm calling Doctor Im!"

"No, no! I'm—" You burst into another fit of whooping coughs and faintly hear Joy's worried voice.

Your hand comes away with splotches of blood, some staining the sleeve of your pullover shirt.

"Oh, shit. Shit, [Name]!" Joy screeches, now terrified. She runs to the doorway and shouts. "Jenny! Jenny! Come quick!"

Footsteps sound shortly later and you hear Jenny's panicked shrieks.

"[Name]? Are you okay?!" You feel Jenny's hand touch your shoulder. "Oh, my god. Dongwoon! Dongwoon!" More footsteps but you don't register them, black spots dancing in your vision.

So maybe you're not okay right now.

Oops, your bad.

You stand up slowly to tell them you're fine. However, before you can even open your mouth, you cough and retch.

More blood.

"[Name]!"

The last thing that registers in your brain are strong arms catching you when you black out, their panicked voices warped in your ears.

(oh, darling. what are we going to do with you?)

---

"I got it! I got it now, hyung," Taehyung says with a grin to Hoseok as Jimin comes back through the door of their practice room.

"Yeah? Let's run that through again?" Hoseok asks with a satisfied smile.

"Okay!" Taehyung nods. The boys are all feeling happy because the choreography turned out really good and is something they are proud of. The good feeling doesn't last long, however, when Jungkook bursts into the room.

"Hyung! Hyung!"

They all turn to look at him, eyebrows raised. Namjoon tsks at him.

"Kook, don't run. How many times do I—"

"[Name]-noona!"

They all freeze.

''She... she..." Jungkook then bursts into breathless tears, which propels Yoongi and Namjoon out of their seats. Jin turns off the music. When Jungkook doesn't continue, Namjoon shakes his shoulders.

"Jungkook, what is it?'" Panic rising in his voice.

"They rushed her to the hospital," Jungkook chokes through his sobs. "Y-Yonsei. They rushed her to Yonsei, hyung."

Their stomach drops at that.

Ever since they discovered by accident that you had been undergoing soul-scraping therapy, they have been keeping an eye on you. It took a while for some of them to accept or maybe even acknowledge you as their other soulmate, some longer than others, but they're getting there.

However, the pit in their stomach and the guilt in their chests never really went away, so they had to do it slowly and inconspicuously. They watched from afar and through their staff, and it pissed them off to no end that they have to do so, but they have to. They want to take it slowly and surely so as not to confuse and overwhelm you, still also confused about what they're feeling themselves.

"Yonsei? Hospital? Are you sure?" Jimin asks. "Why—"

"I don't know, hyung. I just heard Manager Sejin talking to Kyunghee-nim." Jungkook looks lost, tears flowing down his cheeks. "[Name]-noona..."

Jin doesn't even wait for their response, sprinting out of the room to find where Sejin is.

"Jin-hyung!"

He ignores them, spotting Sejin standing with his phone clutched in his hand, and talking to one of their other managers, Kyunghee. The pained expression on their faces and their hushed conversation say everything Jin needs to know.

"Sejin-nim!"

At the sound of his voice, Sejin and Kyunghee both turn to look at him.

Jin halts to a stop in front of the two. "What happened to her?"

"How did you—?"

"Please, Sejin-nim," Jin begs as the others come into view, slightly panting. "I need to know, please."

Sejin looks at Kyunghee, the latter with a grim expression on her face.

"Is it because of the therapy?" When Sejin didn't answer, Jin turns to Kyunghee. "Kyunghee-nim, please."

Kyunghee nods with a solemn expression. "Yes." The others gasp behind him but nothing registers. "Joy told me she'd been getting sicker as of late. She collapsed this morning."

Jungkook's sobs get louder, but Jin paid them all no mind. The only thing on his mind is—

"[Name]." He looks at Sejin with desperation in his eyes. "Take me to her. I want to see her."

Sejin purses his lips, sharing a look with Kyunghee. "I'm afraid I can't do that."

"Why?!" Jin's eyes are shining from unshed tears, frustration bubbling in his chest. "I want to see her. Take me to her, Sejin-nim. Please."

"We have explicit instructions not to let any of you see her," Kyunghee says steadily. "We can't take you there, Jin. I'm sorry."

"If you're not taking me to her, I'll go there by myself," Jin says stubbornly. "I don't care about whose instructions they are; she's my soulmate and I'm seeing her."

"A soulmate you all rejected!" Sejin bursts out sharply. "You all asked her to stay away from you, asked me to talk to her before. Or don't you remember?"

Jin falls silent at that. The others are no better, hanging their heads in shame.

"You didn't see her eyes that day, Jin. I was the one to look the poor girl in the eyes." Sejin's tone softens. "Don't do this to her. Do you want to see her in more pain?"

"I just want to see her," Jin says brokenly. "I won't show myself to her. I'll be gone when she wakes up." Jin pleads. "Please, Sejin-nim. It's all I ask of you, please."

"She explicitly asked me before not to let anyone of you near her, so I can't. We have to respect that."

Jin huffs angrily, turning back to Jungkook. "Yonsei, you said?" He doesn't wait for the response and stalks off, patting for his keys in his pockets.

Shit. He left them in his room.

"Seokjin!" Sejin runs after him, but he ignores him.

"Hyung!" Someone pulls his arm back, and it's Namjoon.

"No!" Jin yanks his arm back. "This stops now, Namjoon."

"Hyung."

"That's our soulmate. Our soulmate!" Jin shakes his head. "Fuck getting burned and left behind—we left her behind. All seven of us. If us getting used and left behind by people who are not our soulmates hurt, how do you think that would feel for her, rejecting and leaving her? Her own soulmates!"

"You know why we had to do it!" Namjoon bellows.

"And it's bullshit! She is our actual soulmate, you saw her marks!" Jin yells back. "You know how I felt about this. I told you all how I felt about this, but you didn't listen. Nobody listened to me."

"Hyung, that's enough!" Yoongi growls. "It's unfair for you to put this on us; you agreed to it, too."

"Because I'll lose you all if I don't! You gave me no choice!"

"We never said that!" Hoseok holds Yoongi back from stepping further toward Jin, the latter seething in anger. "We never asked you to do that."

"You get drunk and cry to me, telling me to always choose you and the others. That's not asking me?" Jin sneers. "You always saying how we should always choose each other and no one else, that's not asking me? You asked me to stay away from her even when it hurts choosing between you and her. Do you take me for a fool, Yoongi?"

Jin looks at all of them and they would shrink at the anger that is not normally present on his beautiful face, but they're all too furious to back down.

"I tried to talk to all of you, but no one listened."

He looks at Jimin and Hoseok, and they both look away in guilt. "This is not something you two should be neutral about. She had been nothing but kind to you."

Jin turns and jabs his finger toward Namjoon. "I thought you of all people can be reasoned with, but you let your pride cloud your judgment. I thought you had the brains to see through your fucking ego, but I was clearly wrong."

He then looks at Taehyung, rage marring his face. "And you. Do you think I wouldn't know how you rubbed the rejection in her face like an asshole, Taehyung? Huh? How dare you?"

Jungkook gasps and whips his head toward Taehyung with a hurt expression.

"Hyung?" Jungkook puts his hand on Taehyung's shoulder, who doesn't look back at any of them. "What is he talking about?" Jungkook turns back to Jin, confusion on his teary face. "What are you talking about, Jin-hyung?"

Jin scoffs. "He asked her how it feels to be rejected, and how it feels to run around with people who aren't her soulmates a few months ago at that bar. Didn't you, Taehyung?" The others gasp, their eyes widening as they all turn towards Taehyung, who now looks guiltily away from them.

"And I had to know from Jackson, of all people. Jackson! The asshole didn't hold back in letting me know how it's a good thing [Name] will never be ours. How do you think it feels to stand there and listen to him tell me how stupid I am for dropping my soulmate when I never wanted to in the first place, Taehyung?"

"Taehyung-ah!" Hoseok cried. "Why would you do that to her?"

Taehyung yanks his arm off Hoseok's grasp. "I don't know, okay?! I don't know!" he snarls. "She looked so happy with him and I can't think straight! I wasn't thinking straight." He chokes on his sobs.

"You shouldn't have done that, Taehyung-ah!" Hoseok admonishes. "She didn't do anything wrong to us."

"I know, okay?!" he snaps. "I know we asked her to stay away but I can't help feeling angry that she's so happy without us when all I can think is we asked for this, we wanted this."

Taehyung breaks down and weeps. Hoseok puts his arms around him in a tight hug.

"I didn't know what I was thinking," he cries repeatedly. "I didn't know what I was thinking."

There were a few heavy minutes of silence, save for Taehyung's sobs and Jungkook's sniffles.

"If anything happens to her, I'll never be able to forgive myself." Jin eventually says. "I'm no saint, but I never ever would intentionally hurt [Name] more than we are already doing.

"Even if we try to make things right, it might be too late. But, I still want to try because it's what she deserves. So, I won't let anyone stop me. No one can stop me," Jin looks at them one by one, lingering a little longer on Namjoon's and Yoongi's faces. He takes a deep steadying breath.

"Not any of you can stop me. Not even any of you." He shakes his head. "Not anymore."

He abruptly turns on his heels, and Jungkook runs after him.

Jin needs to see you, and he'll find a way to, even if has to go against anyone's wishes.

He'll find his way to get back to you.

(took him too long, darling. will he make it in time?)

---

In the end, Sejin did take him to the hospital. Jungkook, unsurprisingly, came with him. The younger clung onto him all the way to Yonsei, tears staining his dark shirt.

"I don't want to lose any of you, hyung." Jungkook cries, face buried in Jin's chest. "But I don't want to lose her, too."

"I know," Jin says, voice hoarse. "You won't lose me. I don't want to lose her, too." He buries his in Jungkook's soft locks, trying to keep the tears that had been threatening to spill since he sat in the back of the car.

"We'll make it right this time, Gguk-ah."

---

Jin doesn't know what to expect when the car stops in front of Yonsei Medical Center. He had a plan up until they stopped, the car running idly in the background. Now, he doesn't think he's ready to see you, too afraid of what he'll come across.

He knows he's getting ahead of himself, but he can't help but think that he might be too late, that he had already lost your heart.

No.

He takes a deep breath and steels himself.

He can do this. He can do this for you.

"You ready?" he asks Jungkook. Jin wipes at the stray remaining tears on Jungkook's face and runs his hands through the now-long hair just so he can keep his hands busy and stop them from shaking.

"I don't know, hyung." Jungkook's wide eyes are still glassy. "I'm scared."

Jin smiles gently. "Don't be. Hyung's here." He takes Jungkook's hand on his own. "We have to be strong for her if we want to do it right. Okay?"

"Okay, hyung." Jungkook nods with a small hopeful smile. "Okay."

For all the bravado that he conjured up while in the car, in the elevator, and in the hallways to the sterile room of the ICU, Jin still isn't prepared for what greets him when they take you inside your room.

They had to wait for you to be taken to your room from the operating room. The whole time they were waiting, Jin can't stop his leg from jiggling and Jungkook was no better, pacing around the room while lost in his thoughts.

Then the door opened.

He stands and gasps in sync with Jungkook's own, and he has to stop himself from falling to the floor.

When they said that you collapsed, he was thinking that maybe you were just overworked. That, and that the therapy's side effects just added to it. You'll be fine, you'll be okay.

This... this is far from what he expected. This is definitely not fine, and this is way worse.

You are hooked on different machines and it scares him to death. Your skin is pale and frail with bluish spots and rashes all over your face and skin, and your lips are almost blue. Your hands and fingers have spots of violet, green and grayish tints.

You look like death.

Jungkook breaks into sobs, calling your name as Jin stands there frozen. He only snaps out of it when one of the nurses stops Jungkook from running to your side and grasping your hand.

"We have specific instructions from her doctor not to allow skin contact with the patient, not until we know who her soulmate is," the nurse says as she wheels your bed to place, putting a hand to stop Jungkook from getting closer to the bed.

"That's us," Jungkook says as Jin steps behind him. "We're her soulmates."

If Jungkook thinks that this will make the nurse relent, he's sorely mistaken.

The nurse shakes her head resolutely. "All the more reason you are both not allowed to have skin-to-skin contact with the patient."

"What?" Jin blurts out.

"I'm not at liberty to discuss information about Miss [Last Name]'s condition," the nurse points out. "We advise waiting for Doctor Choi. He'll be here in a few minutes."

Jin is itching to just fuck it and take your hand, but he knows it would not be wise until they speak to the doctor.

Doctor Choi can't arrive fast enough.

Jin pulls Jungkook down to sit beside him as they see the nurses fuss over you. He has no choice but to resist the urge to touch and hover over you as his chest pulls him to do. He doesn't want to risk hurting or harming you further, so he sits on the couch and puts his hand on Jungkook's knee instead.

"What's taking them so long, hyung?" Jungkook's knee is jiggling, and Jin pats him gently. Jin looks calm outwardly, but his shaking hands betray him. "Why is her doctor not here yet?"

"I don't know, Gguk-ah, but we have to be patient."

Jungkook looks at him with furrowed brows. "How can you be so calm about this?" His eyes sparkle with unshed tears.

Jin laces his hand with Jungkook's, still shaking. It then dawns on Jungkook that Jin is anything but calm.

"I'm not." Jin takes a deep breath, otherwise, the tears he tries so hard to suppress will start pouring. "I'm not, but I have to."

He looks at where you're lying on the bed.

"We have to, Gguk. She needs us right now. We need to set things right, and we can't do that if we fall apart right now. Okay?"

It's then that the door to your suite opens. Jin and Jungkook both stand at the sound and in strides whom Jin recognizes as Doctor Im from his visits to you, and another doctor whom he presumes as Doctor Choi.

"Oh. Mr. Kim. Mr. Jeon," Jin and Jungkook bow slightly at the acknowledgment, "I didn't expect to see you two here."

That sends a pang to Jin's chest, but he ignores it. He knows they deserve the unintended jab.

"Should I expect the others to arrive soon?" the doctor asks.

Should they?

"We're honestly not sure, Doc." Manager Sejin, as usual, saves the day. "Kim Sejin." Sejin holds his hand out to shake the doctors' hands.

"Im Jiho, Animaelogy specialist." Doctor Im shakes his hand and points to the doctor beside him. "This is Doctor Choi Daeseong, head surgeon for Yonsei Medical." The other doctor shakes Sejin's hand.

"Due to the nature of Miss [Last Name]'s case, we would have to request the rest of the security detail present to leave the room for a while. You three can stay, but that's as far as we can allow for this discussion."

Sejin nods. "That will be no problem." He nods at the two men standing by the door, who immediately bow and take their leave. The nurses slowly file out of the room as well.

The two doctors walk toward your prone figure, and Jin and Jungkook follow suit. Doctor Im makes a short check of your vitals, while Doctor Choi checks you with gentle hands and looks at your charts. Once done, the two doctors turn toward the three remaining men in the room.

"Is there someone we can talk to from Miss [Name]'s team about her overall condition and routines these past few weeks or months?" Doctor Im asks.

"We can ask Joy Song from her team, as well as Jenny Ri. They're her closest assistants, so they can provide information. I last saw them trying to contact [Name]'s lawyers." Sejin supplies.

Doctor Im nods. "I see." He takes a quick look towards you before turning back to them. "I'm afraid [Name] isn't doing too good right now.

Jungkook finds Jin's still shaking hands, lower lip trapped between his bunny teeth.

"It's a good thing that her team was able to rush her in right away. If not, the situation would have been graver than it is now."

Jin's heart stops.

"G-grave?" he asks, voice trembling. "What do you mean 'grave'?"

It's Doctor Choi who speaks this time.

"When Miss [Last Name] was brought in for the emergency surgery, we had to do an emergency septal myectomy." Doctor Choi holds up a film of a scan, presumably [Name]'s.

"This is Miss [Last Name]'s echocardiogram." He points at a white portion in the middle of the scan, and Jin's head swims. "Miss [Last Name]'s septum is drastically thicker than that of a person with a healthy heart, so it prevented healthy blood flow to the chambers of her heart. Added to the treatments she was undergoing, it caused abnormal and uneven blood flow to her heart and the rest of her body, and caused complications that were...life-threatening."

Doctor Im looks at the other doctor. "It appears that [Name] has been hiding her symptoms since our last meeting, possibly way longer, so it was left untreated."

"What happened, Doc?" Sejin asks as he looks between the two doctors. "Is she going to be okay?"

The doctors share a grim look, one that Jin notices.

"What is it?" he asks, eyes darting between the two.

"Her heart nearly gave out from the heavy stress her body was in, Mr. Kim. Her blood wasn't being properly pumped and filtered, and her immune system was heavily compromised, so she suffered from bilateral pneumonia, which also affected her bloodstream.

Doctor Im takes off his glasses and sighs heavily. "She had septic shock caused by sepsis."

"She almost didn't make it." Doctor Choi says. Jin gasps in sync with Jungkook, the latter almost collapsing to the floor. "She went into cardiac arrest on the table, but we were able to bring her back."

(jin thinks his heart can't get any more bruised than it already is. your poor heart is battered literally and metaphorically. how can he possibly fix it for you?)

(he should've never listened when they asked him to stay away from you. he should've fought for you and with you, that way you're not alone.)

"But she's going to be okay, isn't she?" Sejin asks what the other two can't, what they're too afraid to ask.

Doctor Choi pauses before he shakes his head with pursed lips. "I'm afraid we can't really tell right now. We put her in an induced coma while we try to let her body recover, and we administered treatments, which will continue within the next few days. We can only hope for the best."

"Hope for the best?!" Jungkook cries his first words since the two doctors entered the suite, and looks up at them with tears now steadily running down his cheeks. "So we do nothing?!"

"Unfortunately, so." Jungkook finally loses it and collapses onto the floor on his knees, staring into nothing. "We have done everything we could for now, and we'd have to run some more tests in a few days. But right now, we can only monitor her. An induced coma is the best bet we have to let her body rest and the for treatments to take effect."

Induced coma.

Induced coma.

Jin's head is swimming with those two words as he walks closer to your prone figure and reaches out to mindlessly grasp your hand, but a hand stops his wrist.

"I'm afraid we have to advise you not to touch or make any skin-to-skin contact with Miss [Last Name] right now, most especially since you're her soulmate."

"What?" Jin asks dumbly.

"One of the side effects of the therapy is skin burns when the person comes in contact skin-to-skin with their soulmate, so skin-to-skin contact is highly discouraged."

Jin feels like his whole being wants to shatter. He can't love you, and he can't touch you? Was this how you felt all this time?

Before he can even make any further moves, the door to your suite opens, and in bursts Jackson, panting heavily.

Jin can't even find it in himself to be mad. After all, Jackson was there when you needed someone the most. No matter how it hurts him that there's another person who holds your hand, he can't do anything about it. They weren't there for you, he wasn't there for you. The least they can do is let you find someone else to hold when you need to.

Jackson crosses the room at record speed straight to you, grasping your hand delicately with a pained gasp. His manager is tailing behind and closes the door gently.

Jackson lets go of your hand gently and turns to the doctors. "Is she gonna be okay?"

"Im Jiho, Miss [Last Name]'s animaelogy physician." Jackson grasps the doctor's hand, as well as Doctor Choi's hand in a firm handshake. "This is Doctor Choi Daeseong, head surgeon for Yonsei."

"Jackson Wang." He smiles politely. "Is she gonna be okay?" He repeats.

"I assume Miss [Last Name] has made you aware of her treatments since she informed me she made you her next of kin?" Doctor Im asks.

Jackson's face darkens. "Yes, she did."

Doctor Im nods his head. "I'm afraid Miss [Last Name] is not doing so well right now. We would need to keep her in a coma for a while as we observe her and let the treatments take effect."

Jackson's eyebrows furrow. "Isn't that dangerous? How long would that take?"

"We'd need to assess first within the next few days. Right now, we cannot provide or guarantee until when she will need to be, but we'll do our best, Mr. Wang. I can assure you that."

Jackson nods but turns to Jin, his gaze hardening. "This is your fault." He looks at Jungkook, then back to Jin. "Why are you two here? Who gave you the right to be here?"

"We're her soulmates," Jungkook says coldly, to which Jackson snorts. Jungkook gets up from the floor swiftly. "We have every right to be here."

"Do you, Jungkook? After you all left her, do you really think you still have the right to be here? And for what? To make sure she's dead?"

Jungkook takes an angry step closer to Jackson, his face painted with rage. "What did you fucking say, you asshole?!" Sejin, the doctors, and Jackson's manager step between them. "Say that again, you motherfucker. I fucking dare you."

"Isn't that what you came here for, to make sure she stays away for good? Isn't that what you wanted?" Jackson is red in the face as the security detail rushes to the room.

"I'm still her soulmate, know your fucking place!" Jungkook shouts back, Jin holding him back by his chest. "In the eyes of the law, we have every right to be here."

"You gave up those rights when you rejected her, so you can shove that law up your ass and fuck off." Jackson's manager holds him back by wrapping his arms around Jackson's shoulders.

Jungkook can vaguely hear the doctors speaking to Sejin, but he pays them no mind. "I'm not leaving her here alone, so you can go get fucked."

"Jungkook." Sejin holds him by his shoulders. "I think it's best if we come back another day."

"I'm not leaving her again!" Jungkook cries.

"We're all emotional, and it will not help [Name] if one of you ends up in the ER." Jungkook looks at your peaceful figure, unaware of the disorder around you, and it hurts him. He feels his hands yearn to touch you but he can't, he doesn't want to hurt you. "Come on, I'll take you and Seokjin home."

Jungkook's expression crumples as he looks at Sejin. "But—"

"We'll come back, I promise." Jungkook's breathing is heavy, but Sejin's expression is steadfast. "I promise."

Jungkook has no choice but to concede. He turns back to Jackson. "You can't keep me away from her forever. I'll come back for her."

Jackson opens his mouth to retort that you don't need them, but his manager stops him.

"I'll come back for her, and no one can stop me. Unless it comes from her mouth that she doesn't want me here, I will be here." Jungkook chances one more look at you before he shrugs off the arms around him and stalks out of the room. Jin, who had been quiet all throughout the ordeal takes one good look at you before following suit, not even sparing Jackson a glance.

No one can keep them away from you. They'll stop at nothing just to do what they should've done before—give you all the love you deserve. Until you tell them that you don't want them in your life, they'll spend forever to try and make it up to you.

And make it up to you, they will.

---

[littlelesbinonny]

The Devil's Den

Chapter 37: In Which The Rabbit Hole Is Deeper Still

You can read this also on Ao3 at: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46831621/chapters/117962293

Alcina leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes, savoring the slight burn of the blood-wine trickling down her throat.

"At this rate we're lucky we're not humans," Donna mused from the neighboring table, "we'd have blown through so much money in these vain military efforts we may be stricken down by our people."

"Have you paid much attention to the human world above recently?" Alcina asked flatly, "their idiocy knows no bounds for the make believe thing they call money that 'makes their world go round', we'd likely get away with much, much more if we felt the need."

Donna smirked, "well then I guess this will continue until we bare fruits from our labor?"

Alcina huffed heavily and shoved herself from the wall, rejoining her comrade at the table, "I'm growing as tired of this as you are," she slumped, in a very un-Alcina like fashion, "though I can't come to terms with giving up either. I don't know what else to do but to stay stationed and wait."

"I don't believe anyone else has any better ideas. Mother Miranda remains silent and I'm resigning from reaching out to her any longer. It's pointless. There's still no word of Angie. And Karl, your girls, Dmitri, Sylvia, and the myriad of other eyes and ears we have set loose remain... empty handed."

Donna's verbal vomit continued, and try as she might, Alcina wasn't much able to remain present for it. She was still very consumed with you and what had happened the other night. She still didn't quite feel right, or normal, or whatever she was supposed to feel. With everything going on, which was largely underwhelming, yet just as stressful and annoying, Alcina felt pulled in far too many directions than she liked and that her control was still dangling on a thin thread. She was beyond her threshold for anymore 'what if's', and preparing for an impending unknown, that she was ready to throw in the towel all together and let whatever happens, happen. 

And you. What would become of you?

"Uh... Alcina?"

Came the inevitable tug from her own thought vomit.

"Hmm?" she replied lazily.

Leaning harder on her elbow, Donna propped her chin in her palm and mused over her friends mental absence, "it's none of my business, and I made a promise with myself to never ask or insert myself, but... do you want to talk about what happened yesterday?"

Alcina didn't look at Donna right away, in fact she took another long swallow of her wine and adjusted her poor posture mindlessly.

Finally her icy grey eyes met her friends and she took a deep breath, "what makes you think something happened?" she deflected almost pitifully.

Donna scoffed, not lightly, "I've only seen you that ragged and disjunct maybe a handful of times in the long, long time I've known you. You were very much off when you came back last morning... very off. So, while it's still none of my business, you and your wellbeing are, therefor I can't help but wonder and have a little concern about you."

Their gaze remained fixed to each other and Alcina chose her next words very carefully; "she is... special, Donna. Very special. And no, not in the way I have viewed all my lovers. I'm beginning to fear..." her voice continued, betraying her inward caution, "that I may be in a bit over my head. At least with everything happening. I don't do well with fear... or uncertainty."

Her response was so calculated Donna nearly dared to roll her eyes, but at least Alcina had given her that much, though she knew she would likely not be getting much more.

"I know you dislike being open and vulnerable, even to me, but I hope you know you can always confide in me if you need someone to lean on. And I know telling you you can't always be the unbreakable pillar means nothing, but you really ca-"

"She's got powers of her own, Donna."

Donna became very still as she watched the deadly concern deep in Alcina's eyes urging to be released. That was not something she had expected to hear. Now, more things suddenly made a lot of sense.

"What kind?" she asked timidly.

"I don't know. But I was overcome by a blood-rage I've never experienced before yesterday because of her, her blood, her power, and she witnessed the whole thing."

Oh how the silence was painfully deafening.

"What are you going to do?" Donna asked.

Alcina shook her head shortly, "I haven't the faintest. I feel like I'm caught in a mangled net I can't escape from. My biggest fear, which I have no real concrete evidence for, says that she could be in danger. And, the more I go to her, the more I see her, the more I may risk her safety... and I... don't know how I could live with myself if..." her voice broke off with a crack as she stared down now at the table, reliving her painful past with a bitter bile in her throat.

She huffed, breaking that thought off, "simultaneously, I'm fighting with the guilt that I should be protecting her, keeping her by my side in case something were to ever happen, all the while battling the very infuriating reality none of this would be taking place if it weren't for me, doing exactly what I shouldn't have done," her eyes, now coated with the deep sea slate, locked on Donna once again, "she is my undoing as much as she is my long lost home of comfort and love. She's given me a breath of life I never thought I'd feel again, and I am riddled with guilt and shame for loving her, for not being all she deserves, for knowing with such likelihood our lives will never coexist the way she deserves them to. I... should not love her the way I do, I never should have loved her, but I cannot fathom letting her go now, as selfish and devastating my ignorance may be. Whatever powers she holds, whatever gifts hide in her soul, I feel them in me now. I feel her in every waking and sleeping moment. I am petrified, Donna. Petrified. I don't know how to save everyone."

Her last admission made Donna wince.

She reached for Alcina's hand and grasped it firmly, scooting closer to her at the table, "Alcina... you don't have to save everyone. No one is asking that of you -"

"It's my job, Donna! Am I not the Matriarch? Am I not the Figure Head of the underground?" she jerked her hand away and rose from the table with haste, "Is it not I that everyone looks to when it all goes wrong? Am I not the one who makes the final decisions, has the final say, and ultimately is held responsible for everything that goes on down here?" her eyes and features grew sharp as she continued, "I never wanted any of this, I never asked to be made the ruler of the tiring, undead, caught and lost in time world that we're forced to live in! But here I am, doing a better job than Mother Miranda or any of my predecessors ever did - so yes, dear Donna, it is my responsibility; it is my job; to save everyone from whatever inside and outside threats we face."

She'd paced at least nine times along the floor by now, rubbing her forehead with her plight of anger and remorse, huffing one last time before she stopped, dropped her head back to look at the ceiling and release the breath that had another pending slew of upset words.

"I'm sorry..." she offered softly, "my emotions have been burdensome. I feel more than I have in a long while. I'm not used to having no control."

Alcina found Donna at her side with a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"I'm sure it means little now," Donna also offered, "but I'm in your corner. Always have been. You won't weather this alone. And we will nail this bloody problem to the fucking cross, and things will get better. I'll fight tooth and nail to see it through."

She smiled genuinely down at the brunette and relaxed, "they say the quiet ones are those to really be wary of... I have no doubt in my mind you'll make good on your threat."

"When have I ever not?"

Alcina chuckled.

-

Currently, you were laying sprawled out in your bathtub; leg hanging over the side as you were half submerged and resting, recuperating from the exhausting morning you had spent 'working your magick'.

The baby fern Malka had given you was now on the kitchen counter in the largest bowl you owned since you'd overgrown it far too much and it burst from the tiny pot it had come in. You'd be needing to get some more soil and a proper planter as soon as possible. After you'd successfully grown it Fern Gully style, you'd grabbed the next item you could think of to manipulate; a candle.

This time you used your greyer magick. Melting it. Burning it. Reforming it. Lighting the wick with no flame. It was... excruciatingly exhilarating. And, utterly draining. Malka said practice was key. Little by little, you'd figure all of this out.

You'd also been up till around 3 in the morning reading over your books. The book on magick was as interesting as it was vague, cryptic, and a little oddly written. There was no doubt the books age just by the language and spelling. It covered mostly Celtic and Norse witchcraft; history, practices, etc., and gave a good index of symbols and deities. You'd not yet gotten to the chapters containing folklore of Fae, Fairies, Nymphs, Dryads, and the like, but were itching to get there.

You'd also gotten a few chapters into the vampire book when you woke. So much of the lore about the myths of them, oddly enough, were written as debunked as Alcina had told you forever ago upon your many nights of incessant questioning. You found it strange since this book was also quite old, and wondered if perhaps a vampire himself, or herself, didn't write it. The wives tales and superstitions around vampires lasted long into the 1900's, and this book easily predated that. It gave you a little bit of a warm feeling to think a vampire author had gotten some of their truth out there.

Secretly, you were hoping to find names, lineages of the vampire bloodlines, and see if you could track down this Mother Miranda that had wreaked havoc on Alcina, and certainly many others. But to your disappointment you'd found nothing. Yet. There were still many chapters to go.

The bath was helping you regain some energy but your fingertips were still uncomfortably tingly. 

You were finding your magick a very physical thing. Malka had introduced you to learning how to feel it out, locate it and harness it, and you found so many certain sensations went with each emotion and intention the more and more you focused.

Helping plants grow was a warm, soft sensation deep in your chest. The tingling in your fingers gentle but thick, the lightheadedness that came after was bright and intense. 

Burning down the candle came from below your lungs, deep in the pit of your core. It wasn't anger or rage, but pure intent to control and manipulate. The tingling from that was hard, firm, and a little steely. And you felt breathy afterward.

Lighting the candlewick was in the front of your face, like an Icy Hot mask on your cheeks and forehead. That tingling sensation was liquidy, silky, and prickly. It gave you jitters after and you felt startlingly awake.

As much as you wanted to revisit the darker of everything you'd done, you didn't dare without Malka present. Lighting your apartment complex on fire or something wasn't anything you wanted to risk.

It was now a little passed 2 PM when you were trying to read the book on magick while simultaneously making a plate of cheese and crackers to munch on on the kitchen counter. Unfortunately, as you were reskimming a paragraph you'd read twice, you slipped and sliced part of your finger with the cheese knife.

You reached for your paper towels, but in the process dripped three drops of blood on the way.

"Ah fuck," you blurted, quickly wrapping your finger and rushing to wipe off the little red droplets on your book.

But something caught your attention, vividly.

There where the text was as stark against the aged paper as you blood, hovering above and over said text was another text; glowing, violet, and in markings you did not recognize, but even odder still is that you could unmistakably read and understand it.

You blinked several times as the realization that you were clearly looking at archaic symbols, yet they translated in your brain as simply as regular English set in. Your heart sunk to the pit of your stomach as your eyes read on:

Of this point in your crooked journey, there are many things to find; the Courts are vast, but none too far -  be true of heart  and sharp of mind.

The truths you seek shan't escape you long; for the Courts call home those who've been gone - through troubles unnumbered, and hardships unmatched - slithy toves wicked games, both brutish and strong.

Darkness endures while you brave the new sea;  uncharted and rough may these deep waters be. Fear not the voyage for you'll be lead through the mist, on the backs of your lineage you'll be able to drift.

The path you've found, is but only the start.  Be swift and be brave,  keep faith of the heart. Come back once more when time gives you wear - as the Courts do not dabble, not here or to there, for Magick is not born of the weaklings to bear.

What... the... fuck did this mean?!

You slammed the book shut and rushed for the door.

~

"Malka!" you called as you burst your way through the shop entrance, "Malka! I need to show you something!"

"Aye aye aye," Malka replied from around an isle, "ketzeleh! I'm just closing shop, lock the front, will you? Come meet me behind the counter."

You did as instructed and hastily made your way to the counter, nearly beating Malka there.

"What has you so spun up?" she asked wiping her hands on her apron, "out with it."

Without another word, you gave her a wide-eyed look of 'please tell me I'm not insane', plopped the book down on the cluttered counter, and opened to the pages where your blood stains were.

"I - I bled on the book by accident - and this text, this floating, purple writing appeared and it was some weird riddle and -"

"Oooyyy vey, ketzeleh," Malka interrupted, gently pushing you out of the way grabbing for the book, her bright eyes staring hard at the pages, "how did you get this?" she asked as her hues shot up to you.

You were stumped, but now very concerned, "uh, Louis, I asked him for books of magick and he gave me this."

The older woman eyed you closely and held the book tighter, "do you know what this is?"

"Clearly not," you stated quickly, your eyes just as wide as ever.

"This is a Blood Arcane."

...

"A what?"

"This is a book of magick, not just a book about it. How this Louis got possession of it I would very much like to know. There are not many left in the world," Malka's voice dropped lower and she came closer to you, "a blood arcane is quite literally an enchanted book made from the old lines of witches and shamans to hide their secrets in plain sight. The red leather binding is a hint to those who knew the old code; this dark stain of red indicates that to unlock it's secrets you must spill your blood to reveal what it has to share with you. Inadvertently you did just that!"

You couldn't help your slacked jaw as Malka, now beaming with glee and intrigue, explained this to you like a school child.

"What did it say, what did it say to you?!"

"I, uh, it was, uhm, it was some kind of riddle? Or poem? I - I don't really remember al of it, it wasn't very forward."

Malka put the book back down on the counter and tapped her finger to her thin wrinkled lips, "I see... but you could read it?"

"Y-yeah, but it wasn't English, it was like -"

"Symbols, yes. Each book is filled with various teachings from various walks of magick, all set to a language special to each reader."

"If I bleed on it again will you read it with me?"

"No, no, it doesn't work like that ketzeleh," she said softly, smiling up at you, "the message you receive will not translate to me, nor would my blood translate for you to read, that's the true magick of these texts! So intricately designed and woven, they are so rare and truly special. This book... it was meant for you, and you were meant to find it. Keep it close. Don't tell anyone you have it, and don't let anyone see it, you understand?"

You nodded mutely and relaxed a little, leaning on the counter while looking back to the book, "it told me to come back after time had given me wear... whatever that means, that part I remember pretty well. What does that mean, though? And how could I read it and understand it even though it was just weird markings?"

Malka grinned, "it means you're not quite ready to read all of it's secrets, but don't be discouraged. Many witches and others gifted with magick cannot read these even after years and years of practice and guidance by elders. As for the understanding; when the book chooses to be read by the reader, it will come through as normally as you and I are speaking now, another impressive mystical trait. I would consider yourself very lucky dear, this is extraordinary!" she turned to face you again and placed her hands on your arms, admiring you with those twinkling eyes, "the more and more you learn about yourself, and the more you learn your magick, this book will bare itself to you in no time. The secrets you find here may have many of the answers you are searching for."

With a gentle sigh, you slumped your shoulders and returned her grin, "life just keeps getting weirder and weirder, Malka," you chuckled, "I'm starting to feel like Alice In Wonderland; next thing I know Leo will be grinning from ear to ear and telling me the Red and White Queen are in the kitchen ready to take me to my coronation to be Queen myself."

"Well, let me know if Sid Caesar shows up dressed as the Gryphon - he's so handsome!"

You laughed out loud and wrapped her up in your arms for a hug.

"If I end up battling the Jabberwocky and jump through the mirror, do you think this craziness will end?" you asked through the hug.

Malka hummed, "do you really want it to, ketzeleh?"

-

"You know if we had cellphones this wouldn't be nearly as difficult," Cassandra said from the other line of the old rotary phone, "we could just call you at any given time at any given place, then you wouldn't have to worry about where we are and the like -"

"You know mother is never going to agree to cell phones!" Dani's voice interrupted, "But we love you all the same, mother!"

"Oh for heavens sake, give me the phone - let - go!" Bela clearly struggled.

Alcina allowed herself a heavy blink and blew cigarette smoke from her red lips, arching back into her chair while tapping some ash into the tray.

"Hi mom, sorry about that."

"Don't worry, I'm sure this argument about cell phones will follow me to the very grave."

"That'll be a long, relentless endeavor."

Alcina chuckled at Bela, "it is your sisters we're talking about."

"Well, I - "

Bela was rudely interrupted once more and Cassandra's voice came chiming through; "Mother, you know the human city council is scared shitless of you, I know the coverage down here isn't ideal but I have no doubt in my mind you can convince them to install a tower -"

Cue Daniella and her boisterous agreement; "Yeah! But then we'll lose Cass entirely to the internet; she'll be on bookface and twatter and god forbid one of those dating sites! Easy pickings for blood though I guess."

"Oh shut up, Dani! You know it's called FACEBOOK and TWITTER, my god don't act like such a dunce."

"I simply love to annoy you!"

The unintelligible bickering went on on the other line until Bela finally reclaimed possession of the phone. Alcina remained pinching the bridge of her nose while taking steadying breaths. At least they were always entertaining.

"Oh my god... ANYWAY. That's about all we have to report at the moment. Though we have learned a great deal about the hidden passages and other tricky gems of the underground while we've been at it."

"Do nOT let Dani get any ideas, please?"

Bela laughed, "of course not, mother. Even Uncle Karl knows better. And you're doing alright?"

Alcina paused briefly, "of course, dragoste - right as rain. Missing my girls, I suppose," she smiled weakly.

"We miss you too. I think we'll be coming home soon, at least for a visit before another lead comes through."

"And I look forward to it. Give the battling baboons my love, and I shall see you all soon."

"I will. Love you, mom."

The click on the other end felt a little heavier than it needed to, but Alcina hung the receiver and took a thoughtful drag, staring blankly onto her desk, pondering if anything was ever going to happen on any end of the spectrum. She hated being in limbo more than she hated preparations for a war that was certain. Trusting Donna's instincts was easier than trusting her own at this point, and hers said this wasn't over, so at least there was something to lean on.

There were only a few more hours before sunset and Alcina was struggling internally about coming to see you. Oh how she wanted to. Escape from all this and pretend it didn't exist for a night, but then, the troubles with you and your newly exposed power made her uneasy.

She rose with a huff that hid none of her annoyance; tired of living and wandering aimlessly through her stupid thoughts of uncertainty was growing old and quickly.

Alcina returned to her bedroom and began to get dressed. 

Donning a white turtleneck, black jeans, her knee high boots, her trench coat, and last but not least; the gloves you'd given her. The smile on her face was warm and wistful, all the hesitations she's fought being shoved in the other direction. She loved you, dammit. She would make this work if it killed her.

As she was closing the gates to the Manor behind her, a shouting from up the street caught her attention. Her name was being called, urgently, by a voice she did not recognize.

Swiftly she started to rush towards the sound, and there trotting down the cobblestone towards her was a young vampire. Her face was twisted with worry and confusion.

"Lady Dimitrescu!"

"Yes, what is it?" she hastily replied.

"There's a Father in the tunnels! He's asking for you, but we wouldn't allow him any further - he's covered in blood - says someone was attacked in the church - he's demanding you come to him!"

Alcina's eyes went wild as she looked down upon the young lady, the shock of this news to her system sending her fight response into action.

"Take me to him!" she commanded with urgency.

The vampire took off and Alcina was hot on her heels.

By the time she reached the tunnel she could already hear the panicked, angry arguing.

"Let me pass! I demand you let me in! I demand to speak to the Lady Dimitrescu! He was just a boy! A boy! How could she let this happen!?"

Pushing her way passed the wall of vampires, Alcina broke through to see this father. He was indeed covered in blood and looking terribly frantic.

She was barely a pace from him when he saw her and lunged himself at her. He was a small, younger priest, one she remembered only vaguely, and posed her no real threat. Alcina barked for the other vampires to retreat and leave it be.

He slammed his fists into her chest and body, babbling and shouting about this boy, incoherent sobs and cries as he stained her white shirt with the still fresh blood all over him.

"I need you to calm down, father," Alcina soothed with a sternness, finally grabbing hold of him and rendering him immobile, "look at me, look at me!" she demanded, stifling his irregular sobs, "I cannot help you unless I know what has happened."

His eyes were blood shot and his face streaked with tears, "You! Your - y-your devils! Come with me and I will show you!" he shouted, ripping himself from her grasp and dodging back through from where he came.

[bedlamsbard]

I got into your fics because of Thor and Loki.. and while I love the world (and you basically sold me on Steve/Nat) I am still very curious about the twins. What made you go the prophecy route?

Oh, man, this was almost three years ago -- with rare exception I use the same background and worldbuilding across stories, so while the prophecy is introduced back in Morning, it's also mentioned in the Yonderverse. It's just that Yonder isn't really a story where that kind of thing features, and Morning's all about destiny/fate/timelines, which is part of the reason it's in there. IIRC, the other reason was pushback against some of the meta/fic I'd seen in the Thor fandom back then, since that was still when I was still reading in the fandom. I wanted to take Loki (and Thor) out of operating in a very human realm, where there were very direct parallels to things that could happen to, like...normal people, and put them back into a mythical realm where stuff like the prophecy was taken very seriously. But it's important that it's also an ambiguous prophecy that could as easily have gone the other way, which I don't think has actually been revealed anywhere, because the prophecy has been most directly dealt with in a chapter of Morning that hasn't been posted yet, but has been written since 2021. So I've had this all figured out since then, I just haven't been able to use that chapter yet. (It is a full-chapter altverse flashback, and it has to follow a present-day chapter.)

Hela is actually the first person to mention it in Morning:

She had known for five centuries before her exile that they were coming, her little brothers. Odin’s sons, battle-born, battle-worn. Prophecy could leave many things to chance – the finer details, mostly – but the broad strokes were always certain. Hela had sat in the hall of the vǫlur and known by the end of the chief seeress’s first stanza that it was the end of her. As soon as Odin knew of the new prophecy, he would have no more use for her, not when Asgard’s wyrd said he would have his matched pair of perfect princes. She had slaughtered all of the vǫlur for that, hoping that Odin would never hear of the prophecy, but the vǫlur were like the wyrd they spun out – no one, not even the goddess of death, could truly destroy them. Sooner or later a vǫlva would come to Asgard bearing the Norns’ words, though it had been, Hela assumed, after her exile, since she had no memory of the vǫlur’s return. Even one of the Aesir could not stop fate, merely delay it. Fate, like death, was inevitable.

This introduces my take on the volur and the first hint of the prophecy, that it pretty significantly predates Thor's and Loki's births (by fourteen centuries), and that Hela is the only one that knows the entire thing because she killed the volur who spoke about it. It's also mentioned very briefly in Yonder and at one point Yonder went into more detail and I cut that because it's not thematically important in Yonder the way it is in Morning.

“You didn’t know?” Sif said to the Valkyrie. “It’s a very famous story.” “Yes,” Loki said, “as in ‘story,’ as in ‘fictional,’ as in ‘Odin made it all up.’” He ground his teeth and looked irritated. “What story?” the Valkyrie said pointedly. Sif shot a glance at Thor and Loki, then explained, “About Odin’s sons being born at the beginning and end of the Battle of Jotunheim. There’s supposed to be a prophecy – Odin’s sons, battle-born –”

So it features pretty significantly in an unposted chapter of Morning, here are the two most relevant sections. (Farbauti's a volva but was not at Urdarbrunnr when Hela did her slaughter, and isn't aware that it was Hela who did it.)

The giantess didn’t look at him. “Twenty-four centuries ago the vǫlur were slaughtered at Urðarbrunnr.  I wasn’t there with my sisters that day, but I know what prophecy it was they sang into being.  It did not come to Asgard, I think, for many centuries afterward, nor was the whole of it brought to Valaskjalf for the ears of Odin One-eye.” Frigga hesitated before she shook her head slightly. “What prophecy?” Loki said. “What – the prophecy?” “Odin’s sons, battle-born,” Farbauti quoted softly. “There’s more, but that’s the part you and Odin cared about, isn’t it?  That he might have his matched pair of perfect princes.  Never mind that you might never hear the rest of it, because the vǫlur that still trusted Asgard brought those stanzas to you in time, but those who would never trust Asgard again brought the rest to me.” No single vǫlva ever got the whole of a prophecy, Loki knew.  Individuals got bits and pieces, but it took many vǫlur to piece together the entirety of one.  Since the massacre at Urðarbrunnr he didn’t know if more than a handful had been completed; most of the known prophecies dated from before the slaughter. “They are my sons,” Frigga said, her voice hard. “Yes,” Farbauti said, “but they could have been mine.  Both of them could have been mine, your blood-son and his twin.”

and then a little later, after they argue for a while and some other stuff is discussed.

Farbauti nodded, then crossed back to the brazier with the kettle and poured herself another cup of spiced wine.  As she spooned honey into it, she said, “When the vǫlur see the future, it isn’t set.  We see possible futures – certain things that will happen, because they’re part of the pattern laid out in the great tapestry the Norns make of our wyrd, but there are many ways that those threads can be woven.  And those threads themselves are always being spun.  Yes, our own choices make up our ørlǫg along with our natures, but so do the choices of all those who come before us.  What was possible when the vǫlur speak the great patterns of the Norns into being is not always possible a century later, let alone ten.  The possibilities narrow as the cloth is worked and the thread of our ørlǫg is spun.” She set her hip against the table and drank deep from her cup, then quoted softly, “Odin’s sons, battle-born, battle-worn – that’s the version you know, isn’t it?” Loki nodded shortly.  “Everyone says Thor and I were born at the beginning and end of the Battle of Jotunheim.” “I can’t speak for your brother,” Farbauti said, “though I don’t know that there’s any reason to lie about that –” “There isn’t,” Frigga said. “Thor was born when the Bifrost brought the last of the einherjar to Jotunheim.” Farbauti smiled, thin. “Your other son took his first breath as the first of my people died.” Loki felt the muscle in his jaw jump again, but glanced upwards at his mother anyway.  He tried to make his voice light as he said, “So Thor’s still older than me.” Frigga hesitated for a brief instant, then said, “Sixteen minutes.  I scried it to be certain.”  She leaned down and pressed her lips briefly to the crown of his head, making Farbauti’s brows knit a little – a somewhat disconcerting effect on her Jotun features. Loki let his breath out slowly, suddenly dizzy with relief.  “So we did come into this world together,” he said.  He had been afraid to ask before, to find one more part of his reality crumbling around him; having it back… “Yes,” Farbauti said.  When they both looked up at her, she shrugged. “It’s their wyrd.  Odin’s sons, battle-born, battle-worn,” she quoted, the rhythm of the familiar words a little different than an Asgardian would have used.  What she said next was entirely unfamiliar.  “Or Laufey’s sons, battle-won, bone-born.” Loki heard the sound he had made only after it passed his lips, a soft grunt like he had punched in the gut.  You didn’t have to be a vǫlva to interpret that. His mother’s grip was so tight on his shoulders that he suspected he would find bruises there later. Farbauti made a gesture to toss the matter aside. “It’s done.  What might be is now only what could have been, and ultimately what never was.  That path was closed to all of us at least a century before your birth.  Laufey never worked up the courage to challenge Asgard on its own ground, just proxy wars.”  She smiled a little, idle.  “Or I suppose he might have taken more than Odin’s eye that day, though I doubt it.  Regardless –”  She shrugged.  “It’s done.” “Yes,” Frigga said softly. “It’s done.”

The Asgardians never knew the other version of the prophecy. That is actually a reference to a What If comic called What If Thor Was Raised by Frost Giants, where Laufey does kill Odin and take Thor to raise him himself.

Part of the reason the prophecy is in Morning is to set up the idea that there are things that are going to happen, though they're conceptualized in different ways depending who says it -- obviously the Asgardians and the Jotuns think of fate very differently than (my version of) the TVA, since Mobius gives a long explanation earlier in Morning. But those things are going to happen aren't always going to happen in the same way or in predictable ways, so the prophecy sets up that Loki and Thor were always going to be raised together as twins, but not necessarily in the context that they were. And again, part of that is just to put the Asgardians and company into a non-human and very mythical context, that they accept is governed by other powers.

All of this is also true for the Yonderverse, it just doesn't come up because it's not really relevant there. There are brief mentions of the prophecy, and then Urdarbrunnr and the volur are mentioned a few times (they'd both feature in the Horizon sequel), but it's just not thematically relevant in the same way it is for Morning. But it's still part of my worldbuilding.

[wordsandrobots]

You know, watching play-throughs of the Iron-Blooded Orphans DLC for Super Robot Wars, I am struck by how slightly *off* the characterisation is. I suspect that's a natural consequence something like this, throwing so many characters into the mix that you can't help render them down a bit (and then there's translation on top of that), but it feels very weird to have Shino saying:

Shino: When you're as smart and skilled as me, you can get used to anything. Akihiro: "Smart and skilled", my ass. First thing you did was try to steal some food, and I had to save you from an angry mob. Shino: Shush, you! That was just, uh...a bit of a blooper. Happens to the best of us.

This reads to me more like something written for Eugene (in fact, this whole exchange feels like something you'd see between Eugene and *Shino*, not Shino and Akihiro). It's one of those quirks that I have perhaps spent too long dwelling on, but in the anime, Shino's boasting is almost exclusively about Tekkadan as a group and rarely if ever about himself. If anything, he tends to own being a goof more readily, laughing off his own missteps (with a couple of amusing exceptions) despite an obvious ego regarding his fighting skills and a preoccupation with not appearing 'lame'.

(I do think Shino would be 100% down for stealing food if necessary, although given his in-canon attention to stocking his mobile suit with ration bars, it's just a generally weird situation to gesture at.)

That said, the flirting with Gundam Victory's all-women mobile suit squad feels on-point. Possibly that's just because this is the only official-ish example we have of what Shino is *actually* like when he's flirting. It all happens off-screen otherwise, so it's fun to see someone attempt to portray the kind of crashing and burning that got Lafter calling him a 'pierced idiot'.

Shino: ...So what I'm saying is, we should all go downtown and have some fun! Kite: Only if it's your treat. Shino: Yeah, sure, it's all on me! But ALL of you Shrikes gotta come! Come on? Pretty please? Peggy: You seriously can't take a hint, can you? Helen: I mean, he definitely can't, but... c'mon, free drinks! Franny: Let's just make this clear: you're just a walking wallet to us. Shino: Y'know what? I'm okay with that. Shino: Love is a journey, and it's gotta start somewhere. Ain't that right, Junko? Junko: Hah! You've got guts, I'll give you that. Keep it up, Shino. Shino: Yeah, baby! I can hear the door to your heart unlocking! Miliera: He's actually going after Junko? He's either very brave, or very, very dumb. Mahalia: He'll have to go through all of us before he gets anywhere near her. Shino: ALL of you? Whoa, mama! Cony: Wow, he really can't take a hint. It's kind of impressive, really. Juca: Honestly? I don't mind it. It means he's fitting in well with the team.

(I still haven't seen Victory but I know what happens to these ladies, so there is a layer at which this is . . . a choice in terms of character match-ups. Seems like that's half the fun of these games, though.)

But yeah. Given that this feeling of it not being quite on the money with characterisation extends to what I've seen of both Lelouch and Char too, I do think it's kind of inevitable with what this thing is -- broad-strokes and all that. The only bit that genuinely annoyed me was the site of Biscuit's death being changed; they have Orga reacting as if Biscuit was killed at Edmonton and saying he never expected to be back there, which is really bad example of cludging a whole heap of different stuff together for the sake of a condensed emotional beat.

Still, I can't deny it's highly amusing to have McGillis rocking up to get advice from his peers in scheming bastardry while Orga is sitting in the corner wondering why this is his life now. And Akihiro and Shino engaging in one-up-manship with the Ultramen is fun (even if I do not get along with that anime AT ALL).

[evesaintyves]

trick or treat 👻🎃❤️

thank you @whinlatter 💕

you get a snippet of my shitty first draft of the Beasts tribute fic i started. for non-whinlatters, Beasts is her absolutely astonishing Ginny & the Weasley family fic that follows her postwar seventh year at Hogwarts, intertwined with glimpses of her development as a child & teenager, and there's a brief mention of a care facility where recipients of the Dementor's kiss live out the rest of their lives. Highly recommend this fic - it's just such a rich portrayal of the whole Weasley family, the fraught rebuilding process after the war, and Ginny's emotional & intellectual life.

tw: illness, death, and very unpleasant hospital stuff

this idea of what happens to people after they've been kissed by a dementor really spoke to me for a few reasons - i couldn't help but think about some of the things i've seen in my professional life. i work in a healthcare specialty i can't really name without potentially doxing myself (it's a small world) and early in my career i occasionally participated in testing to determine death by neurologic criteria - essentially, flat lines on an eeg, which is a really terrible thing to see if you know what you're looking at. it's a difficult thing to even comprehend, especially for a parent - that a child who was splashing in the pool a few hours ago, now seemingly asleep, will not wake up, is damaged so profoundly that they they will never take another unassisted breath. i also regularly worked with people who were incarcerated in the state prison system. it taught me a lot about - let's keep it short and just say inhumanity: in the american healthcare system and especially where it intersects with the criminal justice system, and, unfortunately, in some of my colleagues and the way they cared for their incarcerated patients.

in my current role i work with a lot of patients who just aren't going to get better, who are entirely dependent on caregivers to keep them alive and maintain their quality of life. and it is - i hope you'll understand when i say this i say it as someone who is devoted and privileged to do it - often difficult and demoralizing work. for families and for staff.

my youngest sister was one of these people: she suffered a hemorrhage in infancy which resulted in serious damage to her brain. she never spoke, walked, fed or bathed herself. it was difficult to know what she understood, perceived, felt, wanted. she was a beautiful, calm, sweet-natured child who was easy to love; not every family in our position is so fortunate. it was also easy for us to project on her an interior life that may or may not have really been there, which was a great comfort to my mother. but her daily care needs were enormous, taxing, frustrating, and her inevitable deterioration and death were devastating to witness.

obviously i don't really want to equate people with brain injuries and whatever other special needs with people in the hp universe who no longer have souls - that's part of the reason i've struggled with this fic. there are a lot of potentially-unanswerable questions about the humanity and interiority of victims of soul-removal in this fictional context, but i think the only responsible practice for a clinician working with such patients would be to assume that they still feel, experience, and need what any other person who cannot care for themselves would. including not just nutrition, hygiene, etc. but also company and touch and positive regard. and that whatever crime, even atrocity, they might have committed is irrelevant to my duty to them as a caregiver. but that is easier to say than to do, consistently, every day, at home or in a medical facility, and i know from experience that it won't always happen that way.

anyway, if for some reason you have read this far, here's an excerpt from the story, complete with first-draft placeholders where i decided to rethink some dumb on-the-nose character names, lol. it needs to be rewritten from scratch, honestly. it's set at the end of GoF, when Madame Pomfrey is tasked with removing the house-elf Winky from Barty Crouch, Jr.'s side after he has received the kiss, and I've decided for the purposes of this silly little fic that she has experience in the care facility where he'll end up.

working title is My Beautiful Dead Friends.

Minerva saw the whole horrible thing and it was all over her face, what it had done to her. Poppy has never seen it happen, and neither had [supervisor], which seemed to irritate him; he'd read about it in books. The soul emits a colourless glow as it exits, he said, visible for an instant before it is consumed. For some time in the eighteenth century the Kiss was performed in public, on a platform raised above Diagon Alley. People would bring their children. There were woodcuts depicting the moment, dementors in swirling curlicues, the bound hands and dark mouth of the convicted, and the soul, represented as a star or sometimes a tiny naked man, caught in the moment of transit. It was striking how carefully, how delicately, the little soul was etched, with lines of light coming off it. Even the soul of a murderer, a beautiful shining thing. Minerva had marched Barty to the infirmary dozens of times in his schooldays. Sometimes because Horace wasn't fond of the long walk, nor of standing up to his own students, but often because it was one of her Gryffindors who'd done it to him. He was there all the time, hexed, cursed, punched in the face. It seemed, at first, simply the lot of the delicate-featured son of the head of law enforcement to be regularly trounced. He gave at least as good as he got and sometimes there'd be an entire queue of students behind him covered in boils, missing or extra limbs, pinching their nostrils to stop the bats from flapping out. Barty might chuckle through a mouth of blood while she saw to him, or he might writhe and moan as if in agony; Poppy had a suspicion that it depended on whether there was a Hogmeade weekend or an exam coming up. It wasn't only the usual interhouse skirmishes with Barty—Once, he limped to the hospital wing on his own, so badly beaten she had to put him out for a while and repair his perforated intestines with dozens of tiny movements of the tip of her wand. When he came to, she asked him what had happened, who had done this. He grinned at her with half his teeth gone. "Jusht the cosht of doing businesh, Madame," he said. Bubbles of red on his lips as he spoke. She found out later from Filius that he'd scammed a bunch of Ravenclaws into a sort of pyramid scheme, buying and reselling junk from Zonko's to each other. She was sure he didn't need the money: his robes were clasped with real-silver fasteners in the shapes of snakes. His mother came to take him home for the weekend after that one. He pressed the side of his face into the bosom of her robes and sobbed pitifully while Poppy left them to it behind a screen. On his way out the door, later, he waved to her, like, see you soon! Now he looks content, drowsy, like he's just had a meal. It was always hard to square the faces of the Kissed with what they'd done. Barty could almost be his seventh-year self, resting in the lull of a potion—though he might have already been a murderer by then, she realised. His hands, which had once aimed waves of pain so brutal they'd evicted poor Alice and Frank Longbottom from their own minds, are laced together at rest on his stomach. His thumbnail picks occasionally at the wand-callus on his forefinger. Some unlucky trainee healer will be alarmed by that one day. The Kissed do those little things. Their eyes follow you, sometimes, across the room. They smack their lips when they swallow the bubblemint-flavoured nutrition potion. They sit up in bed. "Look—he's doing it—I've told you—" Llanzo's mother had once cried, summoning the whole staff to come and see. She was tickling Llanzo's ribs with her fingers, and his lips had pulled back, his chest was jerking with spasms of laughter, no sound but a sort of clicking in his throat. "It's a reflex," [supervisor] told her. Llanzo's younger brother slumped in his bedside chair and stared sourly at his mother. She got angry, understandably, and shouted a bit before storming out.

"A rat will make a rhythmic sound if you tickle its belly," [supervisor] told Poppy in private. "You can call it laughter, if you like."

Llanzo was the only one who ever got visitors. He'd been accused of leading a nine-year-old witch away from her parents at Gray's beach and leaving her face-down, strangled, in the shallow mud of the Thames. His mother had given an alibi, which wasn't enough to keep him from being arrested, and he'd been shipped off to Azkaban to be held pending trial. As they'd approached the jagged rocks of the island he'd broken his bonds somehow and heaved himself over the side of the boat. Escape, suicide, or just some motiveless panic, it wasn't clear, but when they'd caught him and hauled him onshore the Dementors had fallen on him at once. He was seventeen, on his summer holidays. Lying in bed on the ward a year later he still looked like a child. Poppy wasn't sentimental, as a rule, but at the end of shift after those visits she'd sometimes have to have a little cry in the car park before she apparated home. "If you ask me I think she's on to something," Catherine told her once, in low tones, eyes on [supervisor]'s office door. "I've seen things. The way they look up at you. You can leave them on the pot for an hour, they won't do a thing, then as soon as they're back on the bed, haven't even had time to get a nappy out—" she made a squelching sound in her cheek. "Pure spite, I swear."

His mother came back the following week, brother in tow, and sat with him reading from Quidditch Through the Ages, turning the book to show him the moving illustrations. Sometimes his gaze moved to land on them and sometimes it didn't. "He was a Chaser," she told Catherine, who'd come to give him a bath. "Fast as anything. His Dad and I were both hopeless on a broom, but he's—" She swallowed hard. Llanzo was smiling faintly, as he often did when he got his bath. His breath came in soft vocal sounds that were almost sighs. "—he's my superstar," she finished. When they left, she made his brother say goodbye to him. Poppy was scrubbing up at the bedside sink to do his skin integrity assessment. Llanzo's brother gripped his hand, and leaned down as if to kiss him on the cheek. "Fucking die," he whispered, lips almost touching Llanzo's motionless face.

[mrswinnie04]

Do you know something about j2 videos kissing in restaurants?

Hello anon! :)

You know, I joined the tinhatter community about two months ago and this question/topic was something I stumbled across almost immediately. There wasn't a lot of content on these "videos" but there were one or two blogs that did quality analyses of these rumors (I would recommend them to you but I cannot remember/recall what blogs they were *cries*).

Anyway, I have not seen these videos for myself. I also have never come across any blogger that has actually seen these videos themselves. Thus, as far as I know, it seems these videos are mere rumors.

However, and I truly emphasize the stress in this however, I believe it quite likely that someone has seen J2 out in public being quite affectionate with one another. For all of you tinhatters out there, I know most of you have probably come across someone on twitter/tumblr/Instagram who has posted about seeing Jensen and Jared out and about in Austin at bars, resturants, etc... Seeing them in public is inevitable, they live in Texas. They are bound to be seen. However, what makes some of these encounters quite interesting is the stark display of intimacy many of these fans claim to see between J2 whenever they are out on date-nights or hanging out with friends.

So, do I know if these videos of J2 kissing in restaurants actually exist? No, I don't. However, I find it extremely likely that someone out there has caught/seen J2 in a moment of intimacy while they were in public. As a tinhatter, I find it inevitable. Yes, our boys are very good at "bearding" and keeping their PR images up well, however, we have seen in countless interviews/cons that the boys have an abundant amount of love for one another. Hell, "personal space" isn't a word that exists in either one of their dictionaries when it comes to one another. Thus, even if these "videos" don't exist, it is likely that someone's probably caught the boys kissing (whether that be in a restaurant, night-club, or in public).

I think the most interesting thing that I've found from the supposed rumor of someone catching J2 kissing on camera, is that these videos were said to be captured (approximately) during season three's break/after season three.

Whenever it was, one of the blogs I read on this topic noted that if these videos were to have spread during this time, it would make sense as to why PR brought in Gen in season 4. It makes sense why PR would force a "beard" down Jared's throat:

To cover up these rumors. To cover up these sightings. To try and squash tinhatters or any suspicious parties.

If any of you have read Speak the Truth, you will notice the rushed/interesting timeline of J2's "marriages" and "engagements". I mean, if you thought it was weird how fast the boys were suddenly "dating", "engaged", and then "married", well, I've read that these videos might be the reason. And If this is true, I think this should show us all just how caged these boys really are. How neither of them truly have free reign over their lives. Over their love.

It's heartbreaking.

It's heartbreaking to think that a video(s) could have so much power over the boys in the worst way possible.

So, if these videos do exist out there somewhere/if anyone has ever seen it, it is my hope that all of us tinhatters do the right thing and not spread the video/make sure it isn't being spread.

We are fans of J2. We love them and their love dearly. They deserve respect and privacy. They deserve to come out/be together on their own terms and conditions.

So, cheers to J2. Cheers to their love and admiration for one another.

Thank you for the question, anon! I enjoyed answering it :)

————————��———————————

P.S. J2 were probably so head-over-heels for each other during the time these alleged videos were leaked. I mean, If it happened while they were filing season three, that’s during the time our boys were falling in love with one another🥺🥺

LOOK:

These pictures have my whole heart💗

(Thank you to another few anons for helping me confirm this but bottom-right pic is photoshopped, unfortunately, but it was too cute not to add🥺🥺 thanks for your help though! Just wanted to make sure I confirmed that part💗💗 love ya’ll)