#I spend so much time for them I think I'm gonna cry tears of joy now

[snackcraving]

My pieces for dimileth seasons zine and calendar that I'm finally able to share :) Some of these artworks are based on stories that are written wonderfully by the writers that you can fully read in the zine including full pieces and better resolution👀

Get the zine now for free until March 31st

[natasha-in-space]

Alright, I'm gonna babble a bit on my thoughts and observations with the magnificent CG's we got for the Choi boys' birthday this year 'round! And, boy, what beautiful CG's they are. I acknowledge that some had problems with them, but I honestly couldn't be happier. Both of them made me feel giddy for two days in a row! The artist did a fantastic job, and it's a treat to still get some new content from Cheritz. Now, let's start with Saeyoung!

God, do I adore the soft, domestic feel of this one. It's peaceful, intimate, and tender in a way that sharing a special moment with the one you love is. I am a sucker for simple domestic moments of romance, so even I admittedly swooned at this one!

Since it's dark outside, we have two options. It's either a small private celebration between you two after he spent the day with his brother and RFA, or you're congratulating him as soon as the clock strikes midnight. I find both options equally sweet and fitting! Either way, you are sharing a small private moment with him, with just you two for a small while. I believe he would be deeply grateful for that.

It looks like he's gotten himself a place out in the city! Isn't that a lovely thing to see? I do think he'll keep his bunker, whether it's for potential emergencies or just for safekeeping, but I always loved the idea of Saeyoung creating a new home for himself, however that may look like. It is logical for his new apartment to have large windows that are high enough to see the night sky. It's very much Saeyoung. And it's very much Saeran, too! During the day, Saeran enjoys the warm sunlight and vast clouds, while Saeyoung enjoys looking at the stars and teaching you about space at night.

He made sure his new home had windows because his bunker didn't have any. A reminder of his new freedom to live out a peaceful life with his family without needing to look over his shoulder at every step.

We have some gifts laid out in the background! The interpretation of whether this is from you, Saeran, or RFA is up to you. I like the latter option. It does make you think what kind of gifts would everyone prepare for him! Lots of funny and/or sweet ideas to think about.

There are also lots of frames hung up on the wall and laid out on the shelves. It made me giggle. Because of course, Saeyoung would litter his home with photos of you once he gets the freedom to do so. It's even a bit excessive, but how can you complain? This man was terrified of having evidence of his own existence out in the world for years. Not to mention that he was not allowed to have any reminders of the people he loved, as he was afraid of their safety.

Of course, he will make sure to surround himself with reminders of a brighter future now that he can. Selfies with you, photos of Saeran reading a book or cooking, and outings with the RFA. All such precious moments he doesn't want to take for granted.

As many have already pointed out, the cake is from Saeran! Ain't that sweet? The first time I noticed it, I glowed with joy because I adore the idea of Saeran making something by hand for his older brother. Saeyoung was always the giver and protector in their relationship, back when they were kids... Now, they can start over with more balance. And Saeran can also take care of his brother. I can't help but think of him spending hours in the kitchen, making sure everything is perfect, and that's just... so damn heartwarming. I love these two and their love for each other. They deserve to be together without fear.

@marshmallowprotection went over the details of the cake very thoroughly in her post, so I won't go over it personally, but, oh my God, of course Saeran would put in small meaningful details into his cake. It's so much like him. From the flowers to cherries and whatever that is written in that envelope. I am certain that Saeyoung will likely shed tears upon reading it. Heck, Saeran can just scribble out a big 'Happy birthday Hyung :)' on there, and it'll make him cry just as much.

Saeyoung is unfamiliar with being taken care of or appreciated. It will take him some time to stop getting emotional over the smallest things when it comes to his family.

Speaking about the CG as a whole, I love how relaxed and tender he looks. It's nothing fancy, just a black shirt and jeans. That's what makes it so soft and domestic for me. It's just you and Saeyoung. In your home. Being together and cherishing each other. And that's better than any grand display.

We get to see more of Saeyoung's arms!!! I always love when they splice up some things that are very much true to canon. While it doesn't make any sense at all to make Yoosung or Saeran muscular jocks, it's very much in line with Saeyoung. It's easy for those arms to lift you up and hold you tight! I also actually like that he's visibly broad in here. I know it's not everyone's interpretation, but it makes him actually look, y'know, older. Even though he'll be 21 forever, it's pleasant to imagine him in his late twenties or early thirties. I know most of my guy friends got very broad in the shoulders once they hit their middle twenties lmao

I also very like MC's dress. It's super cute and comfortable. And that watch on Saeyoung's wrist? Another nice touch. I don't know why, but I always pictured him into watches lol. Mostly because he seems to have a soft spot for anything technical. It's easy to see him being fascinated by the inner workings of different watch models. He's such a nerd (affectionate)

Look at that giddy smile! He's such a cutie. Love to see him be all happy like that. Also his hair is once again super red. I'm telling you, it changes color depending on his mood. It's my biggest theory in whole MM storyline/j

AND NOW ONTO THE MAN HIMSELF, THE ONE I'VE BEEN BENDING MY KNEE FOR EVER SINCE I SAW HIM, THE ONE I IMPLODED MY DM'S OVER-

Ahem

Yes. We got an actual official Unknown/MC CG. The fandom exploded. I know I saw it, I know you saw it, we all saw it. Unknown took the fandom by storm, and he knows it. Look at that smirk. I even saw quite a few old MM artists thinking of coming back just because of him lmao

That's the power this man holds.

Alright, my incessant ramblings aside, this CG looks absolutely ethereal. And it's pretty much intentional. Goes in line with Unknown's aesthetic, too. I know we all love to lovingly call him the king of edge that he is, but from what we see of him? He'll probably put you in something similar. He is your guardian angel, after all. The one who will lead you to a true paradise you couldn't even hope to reach by yourself. He is your loving shepherd, and you are his precious lamb.

The placement of Unknown in such a graceful environment makes sense.

So, Unknown's cake has strawberries AND blueberries on it. No wonder many people instantly remembered the birthday CG from two years ago! It's a nice and interesting comeback. Once again, redirecting you to @marshmallowprotection analysis post for the in-depth on it, because she lays it out beautifully! I'll just say that it's intriguing to note that besides strawberries, blueberries appear to be another confirmed favorite of Saeran's. I know I love my blueberries.

Here's to hoping that this is a fake cake, because if I see food drowning like that, I would riot, no matter how beautiful and enticing Unknown may look 😔 You're eating that cake, mister! You are not wasting it for a pretty aesthetic!! It also begs the question who made the cake in the first place, and Kait puts out a very interesting thought that this is, in fact, a photoshoot. It's also comforting to think that MC was behind it. Just because I'm a sucker for the idea of Unknown getting spoiled for once in his lifetime. He also seemed to be rather yearning in his birthday chats that you can purchase, so it's a sweet thought for me.

MC is absolutely gorgeous here. I have zero complaints. Unknown is one lucky man, and he knows it. Her skin is perfectly complimented by that shade of pink, and she looks like a nymph or something. I also love how flowy the dress is. You can just tell how soft that fabric is to the touch, and I am on my knees both for this MC and the artist for all their hard work. Also!!! MC has an actual eye visible for once! Always a nice and rare surprise.

The dress is pretty revealing, too, and I couldn't stop giggling once I actually noticed that. What can I say? Unknown knows his tastes, and I sure respect him for that. As I said in another post, her lap is definitely not the only thing he lays his head on, and I am, frankly, jealous of him.

All that to say.... guys. MC is just a stand-in. She doesn't look like 90% of the player base. Heck, I look nothing like this MC! Please don't be discouraged just by how she appears in certain CG's! There are plenty of guys, queer folks and women who look nothing like her, who love and adore Saeran as a character. And you know what? All of you would be loved and appreciated by Saeran. Whatever weight, whatever gender, whatever skin color you are. Your own unique appearance will make you just as ethereal next to him. Because it's you.

Saeran has the same love for you as you have for him. Unknown included!

Now onto the man himself..... God.... how gorgeous he is...... I know I felt like I was falling in love with him all over again when I saw him, pfft-

Who is Unknown without his belts and chokers? Once again, Unknown knows what he likes, and I respect the hell out of it. You go king!

Need I say that they gave him freaking EARRINGS???? I know I wouldn't be freaking out about that as much, if it wasn't a fan thing for years. And now he gets the earrings we all knew he deserves in canon. Life could be a dream.

He also has a cross. Which is a rather... interesting choice. Once again, @marshmallowprotection goes over it in detail in her post. Another fun personal interpretation I had (bc I love giving a darker vibe to things) is that perhaps this image is taken after Saeyoung got captured by Mint Eye. Unknown takes and wears his brother's cross as a mockery of his brother's faith and as a declaration of his triumph. I must say, though, that's, like.... 99% not what is intended here, and just my personal fun musings.

I also find it both hot and hilarious that Unknown has his shirt open like that. He saw his brother's CG and went: 'oh hell no, I can do better'. He's so extra, and I adore him. I also don't think he's muscular here???? He's not depicted as broad or buff. I think people just misinterpret the art style a bit. He doesn't really have any prominent muscle here, and it looks significantly different to Saeyoung's CG. I think the artist just either didn't have much time to flesh it out (an issue Kait goes in detail over), or they had trouble with depicting what they wanted to depict. Or I'm just talking out of my ass here, and they really did make him jacked, but my eyes will continue to willfully choose to not see that 😔

All that to say, I definitely went feral over this guy showing so much skin, and the desire to BITE is strong with this one.

He'll be on my mind first the rest of the year. What an absolute treat.

It's so much like Unknown to be all snazzy and cordial with you. I love how they showcased his mannerisms here. It's irrelevant whether you interpret it as cunning or genuinely affectionate here. That smirk is very much Unknown, and we all know it. I wanna smooch his cheeks so bad. Kait also went over the flower analysis in her post, so I highly advice you to check it out!!

In summary, I couldn't be happier with what we got this year. This is everything I ever wanted and more. Will be definitely writing individual pieces for these, because how can I not?

[kisses4tom]

heyy i know you already did an "uncle Bill" hc but i was thinking about if you could make a "soon to be uncle" Bill hc pleaseee! 🙏🏻🎀❤️ ty if you do!

(sorry for my english but it's not my first language 🥲)

ᡣ𐭩 SOON TO BE UNCLE BILLY

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you're totally fine ml and OMG YES!! that's so cuteeee i'm so excited to write this HAHAH 😭🤭🫶🏻 i love writing fluff like these so I hope you like it 💕

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first of all let's pretend Tom is having a child 😻 and it's gonna be a girl because i can only see him with a little daughter i'm sorry 😭. Now it can either be with you or another woman, nevertheless Bill is gonna be an uncle wooh!!! 🥳

I'm gonna go in order (like from when they told him about the pregnancy to when the baby is born) pretty much.

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(let's pretend) Tom and the baby mama made a little box with a baby bodysuit that said "uncle Billy" and a pregnancy test to surprise him with.

when Bill opens the box he doesn't realize, but then he reads the bodysuit and sees the pregnancy test, and it hits him.

"aw you guys didn't have to get me anything!...what is this? uncle Billy?...WAIT!! WHAT??"

his jaw immediately hits the floor

he would hug his brother and tell him how much he deserves this child

he'd cry rivers and lakes from the joy 🥹

"I'm so happy for you guys, you truly deserve it!"

he's so excited!

he would obviously respect the (future) parents' privacy, but he won't shut up at the same time about how much he can't wait to meet this baby!

"i'm gonna be an uncle!!"

his dream is basically coming true

he would always ask to see the ultrasound pictures

very invested in the pregnancy~

my man's READY for this child 😭

he would take charge to organize the gender reveal himself

definitely team girl but mostly team healthy 🤓 (TELL ME WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY TO ME BYE)

he would jump and happy cry when the gender is revealed

"Tom! i remind you have a chance to name the baby after me!!"

would DEFINITELY buy all the cute baby clothes 🥹

"look how tiny this is!! I can't believe she will fit in this"

omg wait imagine a baby shopping spree with the baby mama (in-law goals 😩)

"come on it's too cute i can't just leave it here, it's got little strawberries!"

he would make a gift basket with all the essentials!

when he got the call from Tom telling him it's baby time he immediately JUMPED and ran to the hospital to support him in the waiting room

he would record everything

"hi baby! that's your dad in the waiting room and he's shitting his pants right now!!"

the first time he held her it was like love at first sight for him and obviously he didn't hold back tears 🎀

"she's tinyy oh my god how is that possible!?"

baby voice at it's FINEST

he's scared to be too loud so he's pretty much whispering the whole time

he wont stop congratulating the parents and telling them how cute and perfect she is!!

"my name is officially uncle Billy. I'm legally changing it"

He refers as a cool aunt more than uncle (this is a real fact btw! 🤭)

he would go home late after spending the entire day at the hospital

definitely spending the first week at Tom's house with their mom to help!

here's the uncle Billy headcanon I made some time ago if you want to check that out too! 🫶🏻🎀

[emmic0n]

(posting the fanfic here since I don't have an AO3 account yet) For He's a Jolly good Chess piece

Caine sat in contemplative silence, brainstorming what the next big act should be. When a time-keeping subroutine caught his attention... One of his oldest friends, Kinger, was about to spend his 30th year in the Digital Circus! Humans celebrated anniversaries like this, and Caine was no different. He quickly prepared the stage for a party. The act could wait, his friend needed to be celebrated!

Pomni, Zooble, Gangle, Jax, and Ragatha all found themselves suddenly on-stage. They all braced to endure whatever new act Caine came up with, but instead, Kinger appeared center-stage wearing a birthday hat and a glittering version of his robe. His sudden arrival was signaled with loud, dazzling fireworks, of which he reflexively screamed and cowered from.

Caine himself finally appeared, shouting “Friends! What a wonderful, wonderful day this is! Our friend Kinger,” Caine directed his attention to the regal chess piece, causing them to shrink into their robe out of fear, “is about to have his 30th anniversary here at the digital circus! This is a cause for celebration!”

Caine gave raucous applause as party poppers sounded, streamers flew in from out of nowhere, and a massive banner unfurled reading “Happy 30!! !”. Some of the humans clapped once or twice out of awkwardness, looking at Kinger with pity.

Kinger, meanwhile, stared off into infinity (which was not that much different from his usual expression). Time was but a meaningless slurry to him, but being given an exact reference point was far worse. He had spent almost a majority of his life trapped in a horrible nightmare simulation, a few more years and he'd have been here longer than he had been in the physical world. Realizing this, his already shattered psyche cracked into even smaller pieces. Tears welled in his eyes.

Caine watched his friend cry tears of what could only be joy! What a heartwarming moment it was!

“oh buddy, don't you start getting sentimental on me! If you start crying then I'll start crying!” Caine laughed, “Ha! That was a joke, I don't know how to!”

Ragatha attempted to butt in on Kinger's behalf, “Caine, I don't think Kin-” “Now Then!” Caine interrupted, “Let's party!”

The party consisted of games (that were about as dangerous/painful as Caine's normal acts), Cake (that wasn't edible, let alone tasty), and entertainment (which consisted of Bubble screaming on-stage for 30 straight minutes). As things wound down, Caine announced that gifts would be next!

“So!” Caine said, “what did you all bring for the man of honor?”

A moment of silent confusion passed.

“Caine, we didn't know there was gonna be a party, we didn't have a chance to get gifts.” Pomni said.

“no gifts?!” Caine exclaimed, he clicked his non-existent tongue disapprovingly “how inconsiderate, you should all know better!” His disapproving tone then immediately shifted back into his usual state of manic bombastic-ness, “But don't worry! My gift is so good that It can be from all of us! Kinger!”

The floating ringmaster once again snapped his attention to the chess piece, and once again, Kinger cowered in sheer terror.

“Kinger, my dear, dear friend. Ever since you arrived here, 30 years ago, there has been only one thing you wanted.”

Kinger stopped recoiling, did he dare hope?

“something I have never given you, until today.”

Was he going to get his freedom?

“That's right, I'm granting you your deepest desire-”

This was it! Kinger would be free! He could go home!

“your freeeeee-”

YES! YES! YES!

“-eeeee novelty mug!”

Kinger didn't process what Caine said until the mug materialized in his lap, it read “#100% Kigner” in comic sans.

Kinger never wanted a novelty mug

Kinger never voiced any interest in owning a novelty mug

Kinger had no idea where Caine got the idea that he wanted a novelty mug

after a palpable moment of silence. Kinger just said

“...Thanks, Caine.”

[oosleepyfaeoo]

His Little Dragon

A. Targaryen x Child!Reader

Summary: You gave him happiness but a what cost?

Warnings: a lot of angst, death, prepare to cry

Words: 1k

A/n: English is not my first language.

Masterlist

I got inspiration writing this because of this song sooo I'm gonna leave it here for you guys listening while reading.

The harsh wind ran past Aemond's slim figure. His pale skin was numb from the cold gust mixed with small drops of rain constantly flowing down his body. His tears blended with the rain. 

Vhagar stood a few meters away from her rider, groaning in sorrow as she senses his emotions. Behind him was his sister and mother. Both of them cried silently while hugging each other.  

Your joyful laugh still echoes through his head, and your mischievous smile still burned in his eye. Your soft floral scent still lingers in his nose.  

Walking forward, Aemond puts your favorite toy beside your fragile little body. Wrapped in soft white cloth. 

“Kepa jorrāelagon ao sīr olvie, ñuha zaldrītsos.” He whispers as he kisses your head. (Father loves you so much, My little Dragon.) 

/// 

You were his pride and joy. His little flame. 

The first time he saw you, you were fighting with a boy much bigger than you. Kicking his legs to make him kneel and get some bread from his hands. Desperately shoving a piece into your small mouth.  

Smiling softly, he walks toward you. Throwing some coins to the boy to make him leave, Aemond crouches down and offers his waterskin to you.  

Frowning, you eyed him carefully. Suspicious of his intentions. But you were so thirsty that you couldn’t care less if he would slap you, kidnap you or kill you.  

Drinking greedily, Aemond examines you closely. Seeing the miserable state of your dress, all dirty and full of holes. Your little legs were full of scratches and bruises as well your arms. But what caught his attention while he was visiting the Flea Bottom streets, was your long silver hair.  

You had the blood of the dragon in you, that Aemond was sure. But who was your father? The first person coming to his head was his pig of a brother. Aegon.  

You must be his.  

“What’s your name, child?” He asks gently.  

You give his waterskin back, empty now. “I-I don’t h-have o-o-one.” you stuttered. 

Aemond hums. “Do you know how old you are?”  

A proud smile appears on your round face. “I-I’m fi-five!” you said while thrusting your tiny hand to him, showing all your five fingers. 

Offering his large hand to you, Aemond smiles gently at you. “Would you like to see the Castle?”  

Nodding eagerly, you let him take you away from that miserable place.  

Since that day, you were his little dragon. His sweet daughter. He named you Y/n, relishing your sweet smile as you repeat your new name over and over again. 

His mother wasn’t happy with his action, afraid of what people would think of this mysterious silver-haired child. But her worries quickly disappeared as she observes you and Aemond interact, acting like you two knew each other all your lives. Never had she seen her son so happy before. 

Helaena was thrilled to have you in her family, playing with you and her children in the gardens while teaching you everything about bugs.  

Aegon didn’t even notice you, choosing to drown all his problems in wine and whores. Which was for the best since Aemond didn’t want him near you. 

You and Aemond would spend hours and hours in the library. He would teach you to read and write, ignoring Septon's pleas. Saying that he didn’t trust anyone else than himself to be your teacher. 

To Aemond's surprise, you were a quick learner. But you had an issue, you have a speech problem. Which made it difficult for you to make friends. Children would laugh and make cruel jokes about your speech every time you tried to communicate with them.

That would lead you to spend all your time with your adoptive father. You were his little shadow. Whenever he was, you weren’t far. 

Aemond took you to meet Vhagar one morning, laughing softly as he sees the look of awe on your chubby face.  

Your bravery also surprised him. You carefully ran to Vhagar, the big dragon lowering her head to your level, so you could pet her snout gently. Giggles left your mouth as you feel her warm breath tickle your face.  

You two would ride through the clear skies on Vhagar’s back all day. Aemond promise you that he would take you to travel through the seven kingdoms, showing you all the world's wonders.  

That night, while he was reading you a bedtime story. You grab his hand and make him look down at you.  

“W-Will I ever ha-ha-have a dragon, K-kepa?” You timidly asked. 

Aemond closes the book and put it away. He smiles down at you, putting a silver lock behind your small ear.  

“Of course you will, my sweet daughter.” He kisses your head and pulls the blankets up, keeping you protected from the cold night. “When you grow up, you will claim your dragon. Like I did... And then, we will fly together side by side.” 

Little did he know that he could not keep his promise. 

Winter has come and the Stranger walked through Westeros. Collecting lives from Lords, Ladies, Septons, servants, and especially... yours. 

One cloudy morning, Aemond runs through your chamber’s doors. The room is full of maids, working quickly around the room while Maester stood beside your bed. Where you laid there, pale as a ghost.  

The Maester tried everything to bring your fever down. Gave you every potion he could think of it, put you in a cold bath, and gave you a special tea from Free Cities which was said to be the cure for all illness. But nothing worked.  

You only got worse every day.   

“K-Kepa...” You whimper, a grim smile on your face. "It h-hurts..."

Aemond sits beside your limp form, cupping your face gently. Your skin was hot to the touch, but you shivered like you were in the middle of a snowstorm.  

“It’s okay, little dragon...” He says with a teary smile. “Kepa is here... You will be alright...”  

But that was a lie. 

Two days later you died. The city bells rang for days as the King’s Landing folk mourn their Princess’s death.  

On that day, Aemond also died. His soul becomes empty and joyless, the only feeling he felt the most being hatred.  

Hatred for the illness that killed. Hatred for the Maester for not being able to cure you. Hatred for the Stranger that took you from him. Hatred for himself for not being able to protect you like he promised he would... 

/// 

“My Prince... It is time.” Septon's voice brought him back, his lilac gaze focus on your frail form laying on the wooden pit. 

“See you soon, my little dragon.” He whispers, tears running down freely on his face. 

Take a step back, his eye never leaving your wrapped figure. You were with the Gods now and soon he will join you.  

Biting back a cry, he took a deep breath and finally let you rest in piece. 

“...Dracarys...” 

Are you crying yet? >.>

Tag list: @cryptid-l0ver @saelwen @saelwen-shy-elf @papichulo120627

[bee-named-alex]

OMG. ok so IWTV s2 ep8... Finished it like two minutes ago so here are my thoughts. SPOILERS.

Yeah no there's no way I can wait for like two years for the next season. No fucking way.

This episode was amazing. I don't want to say masterpiece (because I'm sure there are flaws that I'm just not observant enough to see) but it is for sure the word I'm thinking.

Lemme try and go somewhat chronologically.

The start, heartbreaking, the speech "the suit changes nothing" oh my hell. The rocks that's fucked no thank you. Armand saving Louis "again" and Louis not even wanting to be alive. The way he talks about it "My rage was denied, my rage killed..." like he was out of his body and acting on autopilot (like he seems to do a lot actually)

His burning down the theater and killing of Santiago filled me with so much joy. They very much deserved it and omg he got them. He was like an angel of revenge (and he looked angelic too, sorry, no I cannpt be normal, he was gorgeous)

Armand's "I'll spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you" and Louis' "You can't" and yes he cannot but he will try (by erasing your memories i guess lol)

Meeting with Lestat in Magnus' lair hurt. "Here's your death" and the kiss (after not even wanting to be with armand really and just doing it to hurt lestat) and the speech after and we're basically threatning him with loneliness again and it's just so... no words really. Hurtful and tragic for Lestat (especially since he was the one to save him like that's fuckeddd)

Dubai. "That's the end of it" halfway through the episode and their weird happiness like it was obvious something was gonna get fucked and I'm glad it did.

Investigative journalist Daniel Molloy using his powers for good aka making these two vamipires divorce (which he almost did 50 years ago but this time it's on purpose). Love him.

I love how he eases Louis with the little stuff, the discrepancies (that were in the show on purpose they make no mistakes yay), and how with every second Louis doubts everything more and more and how with every second Armand's eyes show a little more fear.

Lestat actually being the one to save Louis wasn't totally unexpected but tbh Armand kinda had me fooled. Not in this really but like I thought he was a passive participant of the trial like he just didn't intervene and not that he was the fucking director??

And now I'm not sure if he just didn't love Louis as much as we thought or if he was actually that much of a coward. Probably the second one tho, given how much he did to secure Louis' love (gaslight, lie, change memories... you know totally normal stuff) and how afraid he is to be losing it now.

Louis fucking Armand up even if it's just a little is great, I have been waiting for it. Go away Armand and think about what you did. (I love you so much but nope rn you're not staying)

And then Louis goes to New Orleans and meets Lestat at his lowest and omg my heart hurts (thank god for "siri pause" it made me laugh)

And their conversation about Louis' turning and Claudia and San Francisco and the hurt and the tears and the little voice cracks and there I was crying too. With every word I wanted to push them together so that they would fucking hug and then they finally did and I know they'll be alright (as alright as one can be in this situation)

Then the tv thing gave me fucking whiplash like lmao. Fictional memoir my ass. Don't you disrespect my boy Daniel like that. Speaking of, Daniel has been turned. OMFG? Like I knew he would eventually and I knew it would be Armand but I didn't expect it now??? And we didn't see it but fingers crossed we get it later.

And there must be something more to it, Armand with his disgust wouldn't turn him just out of anger, so there must've been another reason (Devil's minion or maybe to save his life idk)

Louis in his tower alone (? Lestat is getting ready for tour I hope) and he knows that they are after him. But he owns the night. Powerful shit. He might have a death wish also idk.

I just. Am done. This was something else and there was a lot of it and my mind is still spinning a little.

Everyone who worked on this show deserves the world and the actors even more so and I need the next season like yesterday.

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Friday Ramblings

I don't normally do this but I have a couple of thoughts going on in my head regarding the last couple of days week in BL that I just wanted to collect them all instead of just doing it in tags.

Shadow

I'm pissed. I am a big fan of anything horror or supernatural themed stuff so I was really looking forward to this. (Don't even get me started of how disappointed I am at the disappearance of the other horror themed show I could be watching) And the first part did not disappoint. It was a strong first half, good set up of the different story lines and all the players and I was really excited about it. There was such good meta written about the show, and it turned out to be superior to what the show eventually gave us. (@wen-kexing-apologist specially gave us such excellent meta on this show that I wish they were in charge of the second half of this show) I agree with @lurkingshan about everything they said here. Something which I thought was interesting was that I think in this second half the show purposefully made the fake arm really obvious. I don't know if it wanted us to know before Dan but I also don't think it was an accident. But I'm also not gonna theorize about the reasons because I really don't care that much. The "BL" bait was just another thing that pissed me off. I'm not upset it's not BL, I'm upset because it was sold as such and no one will convince me otherwise. For a couple of episodes, at least, the show wanted us to think that Dan was falling for Nai. The prom moment was just fucking ridiculous. The parallels with October 6 could've been really interesting if there wasn't so much going on that it kinda took the weight of it away. One of the questions I like to ask myself when watching any media is - what is it trying to tell? Sometimes nothing and that's fine. It's pure escapism and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. It can still be excellent. And sometimes it tries to say too much that it ends up not having a cohesive message and it all falls flat. Religion, communism, family trauma, homophobia, mental health, infidelity, teacher-student relationship, pregnancy, murder, police brutality, friendship, bullying, the oh so many supernatural elements, I could go on. You get the picture. So in conclusion, I am not happy.

VIP Only

It's cute. I like both of them enough and it's a good mellow way to start the friday madness.

Last Twilight

This show is surprising me so much. In the best ways. As I said before this pair didn't do much for me in the past but I've surrendered completely, specially to Jimmy. He was so good in this episode that I felt obligated to gif it just so I could keep watching his expressions.

That whole final scene just floored me. His eyes just carried that moment and that whole scene so well that by the end a lonely sunflower brought tears to my eyes. ( and I do not cry easy). After all the cute dates, this scene was a gut punch.

I'm just really stuck on this show, and it holds my attention all through the episode.

My Dear Gangster Oppa

This episode was silly, I couldn't care less about the gangster side of the story at the moment, I'd rather spend more time with the gamer friend group. Wahl got a bit of a redemption but I still don't like him. I liked that Guy stood his ground with Wahl and Tew, but hated the stalker behaviour. If you wanna go dude, just leave!

Sahara Sensei to Toki-kun

Japan my beloved. They just keep giving me all I need. Toki is giving me some Aoki vibes and I could not be happier. And Toki now has got two friends in his corner and I'm so happy. This one and Kinou Nani Tabeta are currently my main sources of joy and my heart is full.

Pit Babe I'd like to thank @pharawee for giving us the novel commentary because it makes it a bit less confusing while I watch this. I have no clue about omegaverse so a part of me is confused, sometimes bored, another part of me is just waiting for Jeff and Alan to be a thing and all of me is happy that Pavel is on my screen weekly.

Twins

This show is dragging and I'm officially bored. I don't mind a slow burn if the rest of the show can hold it together. But the team animosity is just tiring and annoying at this point, the side couples are not engaging ( a bj in the shower does not a side couple make) and for a show named Twins, I would like to see more of them.

Middleman's Love

I'm 99% here for the sides. They are cute, they give me some Ram/King vibes and I wanna see more of them. I was super happy to see Ngern again and the family dinner was a good moment. I don't have the patience for this sort of misunderstanding anymore so that ending annoyed the hell out of me.

(I'm watching For Him too but I have nothing nice to say, so I'll say nothing at all. And yes I know I just did that with Shadow but I was never that invested in this one)

Really looking forward to Kinou Nani Tabeta tomorrow morning and The Sign in the afternoon.

I wish all a great weekend and thanks for reading💜

(because I needed a good cry)

[vole-mon-amour]

3x12, Jamie edition, part 3.

You fucking idiots, both of you. "He's fine." I'M GONNA BEAT YOUR ASS, ROY KENT.

Coffee scene <3 Just make out already! Jfc!

Keeley is so sweet & deserves someone new who will take out all the drama of her life and bring only joy and no jealousy. Drop both Roy and Jamie, find yourself some Boss Ass Bitch for your happily ever after.

But hey, at least they're gonna talk! Hopefully. It was due, like, a couple of weeks ago. (Me who actually ships them) DROP THEIR ASSES, KEELEY.

Both? Neither?

LMAOO. She's the exact savage that we need. "Oh, for real? Me? I actually get to choose???" It's like I said, they sat down bickering without considering what KEELEY actually wants. Drag their asses.

TRY-ANGLES. Jamie is so cute, ugh.

The entire episode I'm thinking about Phil's "People might think they're having a wild affair" so I'm more than happy about this outcome. I'm actually ready to accept OT3 or all single, it's all good. Go spend the night together again, just like Amsterdam, but get lost in each other's arms for real this time.

When everybody started barking after Roy asking if he can be a Diamond dog, the door closed, and Jamie got really curious. hehe.

"A care package from Zava"

Heh. Who is that guy constantly next to Jamie? What's his name? They're obviously friends.

Both laughing and crying. Stop it. ;_;

Colin crying, but we know it was emotional for the actors too. The dude in the back is full on wailing.

"Richmond appear to be crying. Interesting strategy." That strategy is called "I love you all very much" ;_____;

Hands off, asshole. Honestly, the rules of football... Barely touching, apparently, doesn't count.

I love watching Jamie play. I love knowing that Phil really loves football and enjoys filming this.

It's the second (or the third?) time this happens this season. When is Ted going to adopt Jamie? ;_; I mean, he already has a stepdad, but he can have two wonderful ones as a treat.

JAMIE STILL HAS THE BOOK AND IT LOOKS LIKE HE READ IT MANY TIMES. Or at least carried around with him everywhere. Weeping.

"And Tartt finally puts it away" I literally started sheering with tears streaming down my cheeks. I feel like only this show can do it.

Henry is me. Henry is all of us Jamie lovers. God, he could've moved to England and have a constant access to Jamie. Jamie would've loved spending time with him.

Not Jamie's leg AGAIN, but that expression <3 Jamie is THE best. And that smile. That tongue. Having thoughts. :')

Jamie giving up the ball, giving it to Dani to score? TEAM PLAYER. My heart is so full of love for Jamie.

Stay mad about it. x)

[sweetheartmotives]

☆*Yandere Magical Girl*☆

Desc and possible Tw: Yandere themes, Torturing someone, Ripping off someone's fingernail and breaking their finger, broken bones and mentions of kidnapping.

Let me know if I missed any!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

• Yandere Magical Girl who… became your friend thru handing you a pencil and then chatting it up with you.

• Yandere Magical Girl who… really enjoys spending time with you! Studying? Count her in!

Hey, Wanna have a sleepover?

• Yandere Magical Girl who… would never tell you about the danger she fights. She doesn't wanna worry you!

Oh these bruises and scratches ? Don't worry, I just fell yesterday! :)

• Yandere Magical Girl who… stalked you before you two even became friends or Acquaintances.

Hiding behind a wall Ahhh.. they almost saw me!! :(

• Yandere Magical Girl who… would try to finish her fights as fast as she can. She couldn't stand being in battle and knowing you could be injured! :(

Sorry, I'm not interested in chatting with you. My songbird could be in danger as we speak.

• Yandere Magical Girl who… can be quite ruthless in battle. The feeling of you being hurt or worse, Dead, Really makes her blood boil.

Her covered in blood, scratches, and bruises Songbird! Are you okay? You aren't hurt are you?? :((

• Yandere Magical Girl who… couldn't kidnap you. She felt bad, She didn't want you to be sad or hate her. But she checks your phone and makes sure no one else is trying to steal you away ♡

Hi songbird! Oh ur going on a date? What's their name :) why? No reason, just interested is all! I'm gonna break their bones and rip off their fingernails.

• Yandere Magical Girl who… uses romantic nicknames to scare off potential dates or someone eyeing you.

Hi honey bun! The nickname? I wanted to try something new out, I love you as my best friend and I give all my friends nicknames! I wish you would ask me out already :(

• Yandere Magical Girl who… saved you. An enemy had taken you as a quick snack, But luckily she was there to kick butt and show off infront of her dearest!

Ahhhh.. I guess you found out huh.. don't worry songbird! I promise to be careful, Just stay hidden okay?

• Yandere Magical Girl who… let you watch her in battle. She kept you far away ofc, and everytime she shows off her super cool moves.

Are they watching? Well. They aren't gonna see this coming! >:3

••Yandere Magical Girl who… shows you her wand and outfit.

pretty? Thank you songbird I'm blushing!

••Yandere Magical Girl who… was shocked when you finally asked her out.

Oh.. songbird.. yes ofc I will go out with you! Crying tears of joy

• Yandere Magical Girl who… isn't shy to torture anyone who messes with you. Someone pushed you and didn't apologize? Meat grinder! :)

Breaking someone's finger and ripping off the nail Stop crying. You made my poor songbird upset.. you pushed them and didn't apologize, you could've hurt them! So shut up already.

• Yandere Magical Girl who… tortures then kills their enemy if you ever get injured by one of their stupid attacks.

Songbird! It's okay just rest your eyes for a second.. I'll be done in a second! Tortures her enemy for hurting you, even if it was just a tiny scratch.

• Yandere Magical Girl who… would never, Ever, Think of hurting you. It doesn't matter if it's mental or physical pain. She doesn't care, she will never ever hurt you. :(

• Yandere Magical Girl who… feels her heart break when you cry. You got dumped by someone you really really liked or got cheated on? Don't worry! She'll make it all better.

Oh songbird I'll have to hang up now, I'm so sorry. I have things to take care of at the moment, But I'll call back don't worry! Torturing your ex in an alleyway

• Yandere Magical Girl who… will love you till the end.

I love you so so much, songbird. Let's be together forever, okay?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~this time, there's no nfsw, I genuinely don't know how to write Female smut! I'm learning rn so if you want me to, I'll do so! [She's 19 btw!]

Thank you all for reading, She was on my mind! I enjoyed writing! :3

[holdingforgeneralhugs]

hi, emma! how are you?

can I request a headcanon with Speirs, Winter, Luz and Liebgott about a reader who falls for them but it's unrequited? I need all the hurt and angst, thank you!! <3

Hello dear anon, thank you for the brilliant request this is gonna be such a heart wrencher to write for me because I love them all so much 😩

Note: I did in fact cry several times writing this, and I'm pretty sure my heart cracked in half.

Ron Speirs

There'd always been something about him that drew your attention, something dangerously alluring.

The others would actively try to avoid him because "he's absolutely terrifying" but you went out of your way to bump into him. That was made a lot easier when he joined Easy.

Once you got to know him you realised that beneath the scary facade was a deeply caring and kind hearted man, and you fell head over heels for him.

Many hours between Hagenau and Zell Am See were spent chatting quietly together about everything from the weather to philosophy. You could talk for hours and never get bored. There was also plenty of sarcastic jibes thrown back and forth, but always in good spirit.

You thought he surely must have known how you felt, it was the worst kept secret in the company for chrissakes.

Eventually you built up the courage to tell him, you just needed a stiff drink first. Your heart sank when you walked into the bar and saw him with his arm around a pretty nurse. You wanted to run but you were rooted to the spot, hardly able to breathe.

Unfortunately that's when he spotted you, and he grinned brightly at you and waved you over and what could you do only go along with him because damn that smile.

"Hey let me introduce you to a good friend of mine," he said, and it was like a dagger being slowly pushed into your chest, inch by inch. Because that's all you were to him, a good friend.

Dick Winters

It was almost too easy to fall in love with him.

You'd always looked to him for motivation to keep going, and had always admired his determination and sensible leadership.

It was only when you got promoted and started working with him that you truly saw the real him.

He was wonderful. He was compassionate and humble and so so kind. But he was also sharp as a tack and delightfully funny in the most understated way.

You found every excuse you could think of to spend as much time as possible with him because it was one of the few joys you had in an otherwise miserable time.

He also started to seek you out more often, and you couldn't supress the little flutter of hope you felt in your chest that maybe, just maybe, your feelings might be reciprocated.

He'd talk of the farm he hoped to own if he made it home, and you couldn't help but imagine yourself right there with him in a quiet little corner of the world.

It was actually Nix who unintentionally burst your bubble one fine summers day in some German Town.

"C'mon Dick we're almost finished over here," Nix sighed dramatically, "You've got to find yourself at least one nice European lady before we head home."

"Who says I haven't already?" Dick laughed, his cheeks redenning. You almost choked on your drink but just about managed to keep it together, though you could feel Nix's heavy gaze resting on you.

"Have you met the future Mrs Winters then eh?" Nix asked coyly.

"No not yet," Dick shrugged, "I think that can wait until we hopefully get settled back home don't you?"

You bit your tongue so hard you almost tasted blood, but it was better than letting any tears spill over. Clearly you'd been wrong. He had no idea how you felt, and you were nothing more to him than another wartime friend. But you couldn't blame him for it. It wasn't his fault you'd misconstrued his friendliness for something else.

George Luz

George really was your best friend. Nobody could make you laugh the way he did.

You were the ultimate double act when you were together, always entertaining the others even in the worst of times.

But you also trusted him more than anybody. Whenever you were feeling down or needed a friendly face you'd seek him out, and vice versa.

It was bound to happen that you'd fall in love with him, I mean how could you not? He was your best friend, the most amazing person in the whole world.

You knew he didn't love you in that way though, and it broke your heart every day. You'd hear him tease the others about being too chicken to make a move on a girl they liked, and how he wouldn't make that mistake. He'd talk about how if he had a girl he'd treat her to all the finest things in life. It was obvious he didn't see you as anything more than a best friend, because if he did he'd have made his move already.

Joe Liebgott

You and Joe clashed quite a lot in the beginning. He was a total hot head and he drove you absolutely insane. Barely a day went by without you two throwing barbs at each other.

Somewhere along the line those barbs into flirting, and before you knew it you had some sort of flirtationship going on with him.

It was all fun and games until you were all out at a bar one night and you saw this pretty blonde approach him. The gnawing feeling you got I'm your gut was impossible to ignore, and you had to admit to yourself that you had a teeny tiny crush on him.

That teeny tiny crush grew exponentially the more time you spent with him. He was a total idiot half the time, but he was caring and he could be so sweet and so funny too. It hit you like a tonne of bricks that you were totally in love with him.

Of course you didn't say anything, that would be totally embarrassing. And anyways there was no way he'd have feelings for you.

But then he'd put his head on your shoulder, or give you a cheeky smile, or brush your hand in passing and try as you might you couldn't help the bubbling hope that maybe he did have feelings for you.

That bubble of hope was violently burst as you sat on the back of a troop truck on your way through Germany. Your heart grew painfully cold as you sat beside him and had to listen to him talk all about the dream woman he was going to find for himself when he got home.

Taglist:  @tvserie-s-world @geniedocroe @generousdreamlanddestiny @sofietargaryen @cagzzz107 @stolemyspoons @alejodi0nysus @sunflowerchuck @now-im-a-belieber @delreyleclerc @50svibes @eugene-emt-roe @pennyllane @televisionboy @francois-ceverts @ask-you-what-sir @parajumpboots @mads-weasley @tetragonia

[bouquet-of-clumsy-words]

@velvetxr0se tagged me to ramble about myself a bit, thank u v much!

When was the last time you cried? - I cried/teared up a little bit at work the otherday ngl lmao but hey, no one saw that.

Do you have kids? - I do not no

Do you use sarcasm a lot? - Absolutely. It is my main form of coping tbh, like, gotta laugh about all the bad stuff right? RIGHT?. I mean obviously there's a limit and y'know a time a place to NOT use sarcasm and sometimes people get a little bit concerned if i'm too sarcastic but yeah.

What sports do you play? - I do not sadly, I used to enjoyyy sports to an extent? but I mean I still do a lot of cycling and I'm kinda thankful because it's moderately keeping me healthy ish.

What’s the first thing you notice about people? -I guess my primitive caveman section of brain will notice boobs. <- lmao this is hilarious. Uhm, I guess without being obvious, their eyes? if they look up/down, are they confident do their eyes get big etc or wander off. Like whole face/body language I guess? I'd like to assume I have an okay understanding/reading people's faces but I'm also v expressive in my face.

What’s your eye color? - Green/grey ish? It's hard to define it as a one colour

Scary movies or happy endings? - Happy Endings? or like tbh I'm a sucker for crappy comedies and whatnot but also like, I watch a fair amount of films so I just like anything that sorta makes you FEEL emotions? Hence why I watched Interstellar and cry everytime.

Any special talents? - I don't think so. I mean I can speak French but it's defo rusty by now since it's been like.. 18 years since I lived there? (wow that's scary typing that out.)

Where were you born? - In Kent, Pembury Hospital on the 29th May

What are your hobbies? - Gaming, sad blogging, socialising uhh, spending time with cats? it's hard to define, idk I go through phases and stuff sometimes and the stuff i usually enjoy just doesn't bring me joy so I just stare at the ceiling.

Do you have pets? - I have 3 Kitties, Ravioli, Fudge and Shrimp

How tall are you? - 5'7''~ I kinda hate how short I am sometimes lmao but we move.

Favorite subject in school? - Uhm, I enjoyed Maths suprisingly and Science and Geography. idk it just sorta sucked we didn't.. learn much about geography as such and just about footpath erosion, like that kinda sapped the fun out of it I think.

Dream job? - Uhm, Ideally nothing. I guess something where I can make an impact and have some kind of satisfaction at the end of the day where it feels like I've actually accomplished something? Working in retail has quite literally killed me with how much shit is wrong with the current state of the world and how much we over produce/waste products. Like working in the warehouse and seeing £400 worth of meat just getting tossed out because someone forgot to put in the the fridge or THREE pallets of water going "Out of Date" because no one bothered to take them out is wild. And the worse part is the audacity of said company then asking people for donations for local charities and being like "do your part" when it's like bruh. (soz ranty) Thanks I'm gonna tag uhh @confetti-hearts @otherspark @hey-hermy @who-is-this-gatsby-anyhow @sleeping-jo @sleepyyphilia @chaoticevilcult @switchywitchie @musicandmasochism

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

I vibe with hyperfixating w/ characters. To varying degrees I’ve fixated on: Armin from AOT for a while, 1D had a DEATH GRIP on me for a few years, (SEVEAL book characters through my teen years)I had an Alucard from castlevania fixation for maybe 3 ish years (‘ending’ only recently) and now Hobes lives in my head rent free ngl.

I get the “being sad cuz you can’t meet them” part, I’ve felt it. I try to not daydream TOO much cuz otherwise it takes over my life and I’m doing a considerable effort to live OUT of my own head, but BOI do I LOVE just daydreaming about my blorbos of choice.

I don’t speak too much about it (mostly the daydreaming) cuz to an extent it feels like a “me thing” (like something I don’t wanna share with anyone cuz it’s special to me), but if given the chance I DO info dump on my fixations.

I don’t think it’s cringe, not at all. These things are stuff that helps us process the world and our experiences with it. I believe everyone has sensitive weird shit that they don’t talk about, but if there’s something Ive learned is that we hardly ever have completely unique experiences. Most people just hide their oddness. Fandom being a prime example of how much our blorbos can mean to us. I think it’s okay and normal. (Until it goes overboard and people send idk violent messages to others because they headcanon something differently idk, the unreasonable stuff imo)

Can’t believe our of everything people would dare to make JOY and INTEREST the things with negative connotations. Being mean should be cringe, being a bully should be embarrassing. But unashamedly enjoying stuff?? That’s wonderful.

Anyone too embarrassed of their own vulnerability that they deal with it by making others feel bad about their interests are the most immature out if all of us.

Joy is everything that’s good with the world.

Even just seeing the letter 1D makes me wanna scream (in a good way!!) cause it takes me back to high school lol 1D was a bit older than me so my grade had Mindless Behaviour (does anyone remember them, where they even popular) but I remember the days where 1D was like the definition of summer songs

And I can totally understand the 'me thing'. Like I never really spoke about it but I felt like I knew my daydreams were more substantial or vivid than the 'average person' so to say.

Or when I spoke about characters to other people, I understood that neurotypicals likes characters, but they often didn't see them as fully formed 'persons' in the way I do - as to say, they didn't speculate or see emotional backstory, connections, or their behavior the way I did.

I never really shared any of my daydreams because like - I can't even get into it that's like asking someone to explain Star Wars to someone who doesn't even know space travel exists.

I grew up in a time on the internet where self-inserts and OC were seen as cringe, and someone would be very quick to call out 'Mary-Sue's (or flawless OCs) whenever they could.

It's not like that now - but in juxtaposition to canon x canon shipping, that bias is still there I feel like. Like it, as a work of fandom art has less 'value' that art or fics of canon only characters

It kinda bums me out still.

I think OC and daydreams and self-indulgent inserts are all the best part of fandom because it's the purest way of fans connecting with content on a personal level.

I'm happy that I see more people pushing back on that lately. Like after years of seeing people viciously hate furries when most of them seem like very nice, fun people, it's refreshing for people to be like 'nah, actually this thing is cool. and im gonna spend of time and/or money on this thing cause i makes me happy;

like you remember when the new Star Wars movie trailers came out and that dude reacted to it and he was moved to tears and people made fun of him??

yeah fuck everyone else that dude knows whats up.

Like yes, openly cry to your faves. Fantasize deep meaningful daydreams that help you process your feelings. Draw your OC with them, or learn every single thing their is to know about them.

That's why I wanted to talk about this. Because I've never heard it spoken about before. Maladaptive daydreaming, yes - and that can be harmful. But I hardly ever hear people talk about the basic mundane experience of it - or even how it can enrich our lives and help us emotionally develop of neurodivergent people.

When I think of it that way, it's something that makes me happy. I don't think I'll ever be able to describe it fully, and that's the point. Our stories are private to us, not because theyre embarrassing, but because they're so us that to even describe it would like describing a new world top to bottom

I love it. It's what makes humans humans.

[gabrielwritessometimes]

Hi Big Bro !

For the ask, what about : 3, 7, 10, 18, 19, 36 and 39 ?

Take your time to answer ! Hope you have a good day/evening/night 💖

LIL BRO I missed you in my asks too 🥺 ! I'll answer under the cut !

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed ?

Of course it is cursed. It starts with a white page of google docs. Then I can spend hours or days until I write something. Usually it's a -, followed by a list of miscleanous stuff : quotes, "I want them to kissy kissy umbrella shared ;w; !", sets of clothes to describe, ANYTHING. And then I organise it. It takes so little time. Then I give up, since I'm satisfied. Then it haunts my dreams until I open the page turned WIP. And then I write 20k in 5h or so and I post it UNPROOFED and I let you read while I sleep or go to work. I don't even check the reactions afterwards, I'm that mother who doesn't look at the crying baby but is just happy it isn't inside anymore I'm so sorry.

7. What is your deepest joy about writing ?

That's gonna be a weird one, but : feeling. Feeling stuff I never felt in real life or on the contrary writing about raw unrestrained feelings I got to experience. Even weirder : panic attacks make me so much more able to write angst and characters losing it because I know what it is. I know what bounds are like, I know what love feels like for I cherish a few selected people, but as an aro/ace I don't love that way. That's why I feel so happy writing about feelings, all kind of them.

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you ? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you ?

Oh I get haunted a LOT. Daydreams, dreams, little bits of dialogues running through my head at work, a song making me jolt because it'd be perfect... that's why I do lists before writing, it's like vacuuming all these haunting parts and create a puppet out of it for you to see. I perceive that as "this is something worth writing and showing to the world", it's a green light and a good omen !

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end.

"There are two things that make the God of Winter feel alive : the pure unrestrained happiness to see his children and the pure unrestrained pleasure to know deep down that he isn’t the one who suffers the most."

I'd rather use an original work for this one if you'll allow me. This glimpse of Léviatha'n's crooked sense of joy if both a foreshadowing (of what will happen because of him in Esporys) and a mirror shot from Aleksiel in He Who Rules Above the Snow ("His sleep was fit for he knew the turmoil he caused in his close family's minds, and their toss and turns turned into wicked lullabys soothing his heart.").

At first it was more straightforward, showing only Léviatha'n's malignity but it didn't work : Léviatha'n is both extremes, the dead quiet mirror sea and the tide tearing everything apart. He had to be balanced by something equally unbalanced which is the love for his children. Just like Zaga'n is everything to Suzak, Lantide and Léviath are everything for Léviatha'n and the wicked sense of pleasure he gets out of Suzak's endless mourning comes back to bite him when his children die in front of him. Did he learn anything from it ? Of course not, the sea doesn't learn to evade people to avoid suffering, it only restore the bodies to shore sometimes. That was the feeling I wanted for him and I think it turned out well !

19. Tell me a story about your writing journey. When did you start ? Why did you start ? Were there bumps along the way ? Where are you now and where are you going ?

I started when I was 5 or 6. My childhood wasn't really a happy one, so instead I wrote stories of things that didn't happen to me to brighten it : winged bunnies hopping next to the bus like dolphins do close to boats, imaginary friends I was the only one able to see who laughed as they stole apples from the neighbour's tree with me, ... my father always indulged me in these fantasies, my mother way less.

There have been a few bumpses like right now because I am drained from work and just WISH I could chill and do nothing, slowing down all my creative process. I also had a few in middleschool when I became terrified of writing, one of my bullies reading texts she found aloud for everyone to laugh at me.

I have two solid novels I can share with the world though, a visual novel planned and many novels to write about the lore of the Life Marble, stories of unconsequential characters to show their daily life, insights of the Gods' minds, diaries found after the End, ... I also started drawing to be able to give my characters some realness. Will I be able to do it ? Wait and see !

36. They say to Write What You Know. Setting aside for a moment the fact that this is terrible advice…what do you Know ?

I know of loss, grief and not belonging. I know of secrets unshared gnawing at your insides and invasive thoughts. Of the fear of lies colliding between two worlds you tried to keep separate. Of panic attacks of being too much and too less at the same time, of blaming looks and punching walls and yelling to get people to look at me. I know of being put aside because I asked for basic decency.

I also know of softness and joy, of shared looks and desires, of joined hands kissed softly under an apple tree. I know of aspirations, of setting a clear way and being patted on the back after offering the word they needed or a hot chocolate. I know of the silent gratitude in shared looks after discovering someone did something for you the way you wanted it done.

I know of baby steps and the pride of keeping balance when everything starts to tip. I know of taking commands or receiving them without arguing, because sometimes people should really let their ego aside and stop feeling attacked out of thin air. I know of putting myself first, saying no and biting back too.

39. What keeps you writing when you feel like giving up ?

Writing is as necessary as breathing for me. It comes easily, trained since childhood, and no matter the support or the time I'll always be able to do it. I am tired but will still write a description of a peculiar plant in my lore or find a new way to sign documents for Aksel. Because you don't need to write 450 pages to be writing. Just like reading comics is still reading, roleplaying, creating charasheets and lore is still writing.

[the-psyco-simp]

Through your love, I’m saved

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Bonten!Ran Haitani

“I’ve heard of a love that comes, once in a lifetime. And I’m pretty sure that you are, that love of mine…”

Synopsis: Ran can’t help but give in when you ask him to stay in bed with you in the morning.

CW: none, just pure fluff, pet names (baby girl, love), probably some angst

Word Count: 883

Authors Note: This is just something I thought up while unable to sleep last night, and it’s dedicated to @sweet-seishu come get your mans 👀 (for the full effect, listen to “Dandelions (slowed and reverb) by Ruth B. It will make you cry)

The sound of your husband’s alarm going off brings you out of your dreamland and into the land of waking. You hear Ran groan and feel the bed move as he reaches to turn it off. You roll over to look at him as he checks the time.

"Ran? Do you really have to leave?" you ask sleepily, putting your arm around him and press your body into his side, trying to convince him to stay in bed with you a little bit longer. It's the same song and dance every day, you want nothing more than to hold your husband close, than him getting up and leaving you alone anyways.

"You know I do. As they say, no rest for the wicked." He looks down at where your head is now resting on his chest. His heart squeezes at the sight of your sad eyes. He wishes he could take the time to just lay with you. To remember the peace, he always feels with you in his arms. But he knows if he gives in now, he won't get out of bed for the rest of the day. He'd give anything in the world to stay under the covers and bask in the warmth and light you've always brought to his dark world.

"Please, love? Just stay here with me a little bit longer. I've missed spending time with you in the morning." You plead, hoping this morning he would give in to you. You tighten your arm around him and nuzzle your face further into his chest.

He maneuvers his arm around your shoulders and sighs, running his figures up and down your arm. He closes his eyes again for a few seconds, trying to harden his resolve to get up and get ready to go into work, when he feels you placing light kisses on his chest.

He can't help but relax under your actions, "Babygirl, if you keep doing that I really won't want to leave, and I gotta go to work." He makes no move to stop you already losing his grip on what little motivation he had.

"That's the point, Ran. I miss you. You're gone all day; you don't get back until two in the morning. I never get to see you anymore." You can feel tears falling out of your eyes. "All I'm asking for here is one day. One day that we spend together like when we were younger." Your figures tracing the tattoo covering the left side of his body.

He can hear the way your voice cracks, and with it so does his heart. Ran knows he hasn't been around much lately, that he's been neglecting you, but he didn't think it was hurting you this much.

He stays quiet for a few seconds contemplating his options. If he calls in, Mikey will chew him out when he gets back, but he would gladly suffer through it to be able to spend the day with you. "I'm sorry I haven't been around, babygirl. I'll make more time for you, I promise." He kisses the top of your head to seal the promise.

"Does that mean you'll cuddle with me?" You look up at him, seeing his beautiful violet eyes looking down at you. The love in them takes your breath away. It had been so long since you saw such a calm joy in their depths.

The smile on his face got bigger as he picked up his phone again, tapping the screen a few times before bringing it to his ear. "Ran?" you asked, trying to figure out what he was doing. Ran held up his finger to ask you to give him a second.

"Hello?" Answers the bored voice on the other end of the call.

"I won't be coming in today, Rin. That gonna be a problem?" Ran hadn't broken eye contact with you, so he could see the way your eyes light up at his words.

Rindou laughed before answering, "Finally taking some time with your girl, huh?" Rin laughed again. "Don't worry about it brother, I'll cover for you today. Say hi to her for me though." His tone was teasing at the end, which made Ran roll his eyes.

"She says hi back, and yeah. Thanks, man. I owe you one." Ran hung up the phone as his brother chuckled again. He set it to the side, keeping his eyes on you.

Ran maneuvered so he could put his hands on your hips and help you to straddle his waist. he laid on his back and looked up at you, admiring the view. With the sun now streaming through the drapes you almost seemed to have a halo over your head. Which thought was perfect, considering he thought of you as an angle sent to save him.

"You are the best thing to ever happen to me, and I will spend every second of the rest of my life proving that to you. I love you, babygirl." Ran leaned up to seal his lips with yours, hoping the kiss would say what he could seem to put into words.

You pull away slightly, murmuring, "I love you too, Ran. More than you could ever know." Before putting your lips back on his, smiling into the kiss.

[effeminateboyninja]

Hi there! I happened upon your blog a while back and followed when I started getting hardcore Naruto obsessed (specifically, I’m a total Shika simp), and I really love your writing :) I was wondering if I could request some fluffy dad!Shikamaru content throughout his s/o’s pregnancy and labor/delivery and being an emotional mess upon meeting his baby for the first time. But overall just being a great dad and an amazing supportive partner!! 😭💞

thanks so much hon!!! 💚💚💚 im actually so soft for this concept (and this man) and now that i'm about to post this i have an idea for a really cute one shot??? in the future i guess, but for now enjoy some headcanons 😌

Shikamaru pregnancy hcs ♡

child by bry 🎶

when you first tell him you’re expecting he experiences a split second of panic. a baby?! aren’t they like, a lot of work? that’s not really his thing

but once the initial surprise wears off and he starts picturing your little family — lazy mornings with another tiny person snuggled up between the two of you… the idea doesn’t seem too troublesome after all

so he wraps you up into his arms, squeezing you tight as he chuckles, “well changing diapers is gonna be a drag,” he pauses to place a soft kiss on your lips, “but there’s no one else I’d rather start a family with.”

shikamaru would be the most calming person to be around during your pregnancy. he’s so patient with your mood swings and always manages to stay calm when you’re stressing about the babies arrival

he leaves most of the planning to you, you’re just better at that stuff he says, and lbr he’s probably right. you know he’ll be a dedicated father but picking out nursery colours is certainly not his forte

gets a lil embarrassed when people congratulate him on the pregnancy or ask about baby names and things like that. “ask (y/n)” becomes his new catchphrase

underneath all those sighs and bashful looks though, he’s just as excited as you and your friends. he knows it’s silly but he can’t wait to teach the little one shogi

would always be there to massage your feet and order fast food for your weird cravings! honestly anything to keep you happy and calm amidst all the pregnancy hormones, he’s a bit scared of the screaming and/or crying that might ensue otherwise

the big day finally comes and he feels 100% out of place in the delivery room. the fact that he can’t do anything, just the unpredictability of it all, it drives him wild. He’ll put on a brave face for you though, he knows he needs to stay calm for you

(he’s working on his breathing just as hard as you but plays it off like he’s just coaching you through it)

and then when it’s finally over, and everything is calm again, they ask him if he wants to hold his child and his whole world stops for the second time in his life since he met you

he thought he understood Asuma’s last words; that the king was really the next generation, but looking at down at this beautiful person that you made together, so healthy and innocent and perfect - it takes on a whole new meaning

so he cries. for the first time since his sensei’s death, but this time they’re tears of joy, of just pure disbelief that he could have ever made something so precious… it must’ve been you, he thinks as he looks up you, too happy to even be embarrassed by the tears that are falling down his cheeks

might complain a bit, but he puts in his fair share of work, often getting up in the middle of the night to soothe the crying baby so you can get some much needed rest

early morning cuddles with the three of you are a regular occurrence.

i think shikamaru would really start to shine as a father once the baby period is over, he’d spend time playing with them and teaching them everything he knows

he has a habit of dozing off while he reads bedtime stories. you’ve found him on more than one occasion snuggled up beside your little one in their small, plastic bed, their picture book from the night still laying on his chest.

and you know he’ll moan about how sore his neck is the next day if you don’t wake him and bring him to bed with you, but the moment is just too sweet, too endearing to end that soon, so you’ll wait just a minute or two longer before leaning over Shikamaru’s sleeping form and whispering, “you did it again,” to which he’ll scoff and say he just had a long day, but you know the truth

like his own father he’s a bit awkward when it comes to parental affection but he does his best, and he’s always there to give your child advice or get their mind of things with an afternoon of cloud watching

Shikamaru might be a lazy guy but he would do anything for his family, 10/10 amazing father

[landothemuppet]

Far Longer Than Forever (p.p)

Word count: 4737

Pairing : peter parker

Request: YES! ANON I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. The Swan Princess is one of my childhood movie and this was so fun to write. I can’t stop listenning the soundtrack now ! I’m so sorry for the time i took to write this, i had so much work to do with school. But it’s over now and i hope you will like this ! 

N/A:  First, gif not mine but i don’t know who i’m gonna credit on this, i have no clue...This is my first Peter Parker x reader and i hope you all will like it! As always, I remind you that English is not my native language. Don’t hesitate to tell me what you think of the fic! Like, reblogs to support. You can Love you all! xx

Taglist: @angeliquekalampoka @harryhollandsgirlfriend @cedricdiggorysimpp​ - if you want to be notified of all my future writings you can add yourself in my taglist : here

______

As far as you can remember, you've always hated summer. Well, it was partly a lie. You loved the sweltering heat of Queens, the cherry popsicles from Delmar's, not having to worry about what time you had to get up. You liked it but hated the idea of ​​the last two weeks of August.

 This year was no exception. You looked at your half-finished suitcase, a grimace on your face. August still meant the same thing, the same routine: having to spend the last three weeks of his vacation with Peter Parker.

summer 2009

Peter Parker had lost his parents very early on, two years ago. He had lived since then with his aunt May and his uncle Ben. It was your mother's idea to introduce you to each other. Aunt May and your mom were friends from college and luckily, they lived in the same neighborhood. Your first meeting with the one who, many years later, would become Spider-Man, took place on his eighth birthday. You were invited to the party when you weren't even at the same school. Aunt May had simply shared his fears about Peter's difficulty making friends after the trauma he had experienced. Your mother, as the perfect friend that she was, had suggested that Peter and you spend time together.

 There were 3 kids in total at that birthday party, you, Peter - obviously - and a boy from his school whose mother had forced him to be there, too. It was a fact; you were the only girl and you didn't know Peter at all. Your mother walked up to you, got up to your eye level and whispered

 "Can you be nice? May told me she invited Peter's whole class and only this boy came"

 You wanted to please your mother so you nodded before approaching the two boys. Peter and his friend were in the corner of the room, their backs turned to the adults. When you tapping the young boy on the shoulder to make you notice by him, he turned to you with a guilty expression. He had buttercream all over the corner of his mouth and he was holding a cupcake in his hand that looked delicious.

 “My Aunt May tried to bake a cake, but Uncle Ben bought some cupcakes in anticipation. Do you want one?” Peter asked you in a friendly voice

“Why? Is May's cake not good?

“Uncle Ben says that she is not very good at cooking.”

 You let out a little laugh and nodded your head before grabbing the cupcake with a smile. You thanked him and began to taste the little pastry with envy. It was so good! The buttercream was lemony, the cupcake was slightly lemony too but there was a taste you couldn't recognize. You were almost sure you had tasted it before, but you couldn't tell what it was. Peter and the other boy suggested that you go to Peter's room. He wanted to show you the LEGO set his uncle Ben had given him ahead of time and you followed them even though you weren't more excited about the idea.

 And you were right. For several minutes, you were pushed aside while the two young boys spoke spiritedly. You complained several times that you wanted to do something else but Peter didn't seem to listen to you, too excited to finally be able to chat with someone who appreciated Star Wars as much as he did.

 So you were annoyed and slightly angry with Peter but what broke the camel's back is that you started to not feel so good. Your throat was itching and you felt like your tongue was taking up a lot more space in your mouth, getting drier. Peter gave you a distracted look before his eyes widened. He let go of everything he had in his hands before running to his aunt.

 "Aunt May, Aunt May! Y/N's tongue looks like a big, desiccated steak!"

"Peter, don't be rude!" she exclaimed, shocked by her nephew’s words

"No, no come see, she has a huge tongue! I think something is wrong"

 Meanwhile, you ran into the bathroom at Peter's reaction. You weren't sure why he had looked at you like that, but you felt that a few things were wrong. In addition, you were more and more thirsty, your eyes also hurt. And that's when you saw your reflection. You were puffy, your tongue had tripled in size, hence this feeling of dryness and discomfort. It was the same with your throat. You started to cry and when May called you through the bathroom door, you fervently opened it.

 May and your mother's expression of horror was instantaneous and your mother knew exactly what was causing your condition.

 "What did she eat?"

"Nothing..." he tried to escape from being grounded

"Peter, this is very important. What did you eat?"

"We just ate the cupcakes Uncle Ben brought back"

 Ben looked at May with guilty eyes. May had put so much effort into Peter's birthday cake and she felt hurt that they had bought some pastries in anticipation. Your mother was impatiently stamping her foot. It was important to know exactly what you had eaten and above all, you shouldn't waste any more time. Peter felt completely helpless. He had only given a cupcake to his guest, that’s all. What was wrong with giving someone a cupcake?

 "What were those cupcakes flavor?" your mother said impatiently ...

"With lemon and almonds." he said in a very small voice.

 You were panicked. And the eight-year-old that you were was not coping well with stress. Plus, your feeling of being sidelined by Peter and his friend made you feel even worse. So you frowned. You couldn't see a thing but you could feel the torrent of tears escaping your cheeks. You pointed at Peter with rage

 "You tried to kill me !!!" you said somehow with your tongue as big as a little tangerine.

"It's not true!"

"Yes! You are a murderer"

 And you cried even more before your mother takes you to the emergency room as quickly as possible, apologizing for the scene.

 The week later, May forced Peter to apologize for giving you a cupcake, while justifying that he didn't know about your allergy. Your mother forced you to apologize for insulting Peter "a murderer" and accept his apologies.

 But you spent the rest of the vacation arguing with the little guy. After all, you didn't want to be friends with a murderer.

 Summer 2013

Aunt May and your mom didn't let go, however, and every summer you spent three damn weeks with Peter. The summer of your twelve years, you did not thus escape this eternal masquerade but this year, the tide had turned in your favor.

 From the start, you never liked Star Wars. It really wasn't your world. You had always preferred Harry Potter and although Peter had read the books and enjoyed them - which he would never admit to you as that would amount to listing the commonalities you had - he was much more invested in the galactic universe. But on that day, Peter had particularly bothered you. He had first replaced the sugar in your hot chocolate with salt. He kept chanting silly nursery rhymes about you and the downstairs neighbor, insinuating that you were in love: which was not the case. Yes, Peter had been extremely annoying. This time Peter was getting on your nerds by bouncing a small ball against the ceiling as you tried to read your book. Uncle Ben was in the living room watching the sport - you weren't sure exactly which one since it didn't matter to you - so you couldn't go anywhere else to be quiet.

 "Peter, stop it."

"Stop what?" he asked by bouncing the ball once more off his ceiling. You could even make out the smirk on his lips.

"That. Stop it! I can't read."

"This is nothing new."

 You threw him the first thing you found on his desk, c.e, a banana, which he easily dodged. You groaned in frustration. May and your mother didn't understand when you talked about Peter's attitude towards you. He was a calm child, far too shy at school and interested in everything, especially science. He was looking forward to entering Midletown High School in two years. You hated that nerd side about him. Secretly, you were a little jealous of him for being the smartest in the room.

 “I'm gonna hit you so hard you won't know your name anymore”

“ try me, dumbass.”

  A few minutes later, he had finally stopped throwing that damn ball, but obviously Peter's boredom was driving him to find everything the most boring thing than the previous one to drive you crazy. This time, he had simply taken his favorite lightsaber - because he had several - and he was poking your shoulder to get your attention.

 "Parker, stop!"

"Don't you want to drop this book and watch a movie?"

"What do you want to watch? Star Wars? No thanks ..."

"Oh come on, Y / N! I'm sure you'll like it!"

 He patted you on the shoulder once more with his lightsaber.

 "Do you want to play this, Parker?" you said before grabbing one of his other lightsabers

"What are you going to do? I'm sure you don't know how to fight with" he mocked.

 You have lit the glowing plastic stick and you are placed in the guard position.

 "Do you want to bet, knothead?"

 He smiled at you and attacked you first. Strangely, this is what most resembled a moment of bond between Peter and you and deep down, you appreciate it. But you also appreciate that possibility of kicking his ass after he's been so irritating. You responded to his lightsaber attacks with ease and joy. It was playful, childish, but it was one of the few times you had fun with Peter. And you really appreciate it. Your two laughs mingled, echoing in the room.

 But suddenly, as you were trying to dodge an attack from the brunet, your elbow made contact with his face. Peter's muffled cry of pain echoed and you froze. He was holding his nose with a grimace and when he took his hand away you both noticed in horror that he was bleeding.

 "Fuck…"

"Pete..." you started talking

"You blew my nose!" Peter shouted

"I did not do it on purpose!" you defended yourself.

"Of course, you do! You fucking blew my nose!"

"Peter, I swear ..."

 But Peter interrupted you by rushing out of his bedroom looking for his aunt who was in the office as she tried to file the important papers, that Ben and her had received this week. You were livid. First, because you didn't mean to hurt Peter on purpose. Second, you couldn't stand the sight of blood and it was literally everywhere. Peter was leaving trails of droplets on the floor of the apartment.

 "Aunt May?!? Y/N blew my nose! Damn, I'm bleeding!"

 After a brief stint in the ER, the rest of the stay was peaceful as you and Peter avoided each other until the end of the summer.

 Summer 2017

Peter was not the Peter you had always known.

 Since the death of his uncle Ben, the young man had closed in on himself and was even further away. Always so intelligent and discreet but much more distant. He had stopped teasing you or doing things that got on your nerves. He was minding his own business. And even though you had tried to be there for him, not denying him any of the offers he made to you during your stay ... you found him really ... overwhelmed. Which was still understandable.

 But this year was worse than the last. May told your mother that last year Peter got an internship at Stark Industry and attended a seminar in Germany but came back with a black eye. He had been acting most weirdly ever more since then. And you could have witnessed it. In the afternoon, when you were busy, and when it was too hot, when you tried to rest, Peter would disappear for hours. When you caught him sneaking back several times, he made you promise not to tell Aunt May.

 And you were starting to have theories about his nighttime getaways. After all, you were 16 and you too had started dating a few boys. But it never really worked. who knows why?! And when you wondered if Peter had a girlfriend, and who she was - he had to have one in view of all his sneaking out - your stomach twisted in a strange feeling. You didn't understand why the thought of Peter having a girlfriend bothered you so much. Over time, you had learned to be friends. It still happened sometimes that you quarreled but the events of the life made you grow up. Your parents had divorced, Peter had lost his uncle. You could tell yourself that you both had grown.

 And it was one night when Peter was sneaking back in again that you discovered two secrets.

 The first one: He was Spider-Man.

 It was around midnight when you heard the sound of the window opening. Since your childhood and this Machiavellian plan of your mother and Aunt May, you had always slept in Peter's room during holiday and more recently in his bed. The noise alerted you and you got up in a sitting position. But the only thing you saw was a foot, placed on this said window, closing it gently. How the hell was that possible?

 You were ready to scream but your gut told you to look up at the ceiling. A figure hung on it and you were paralyzed. Were you having one of those weird experiences called sleep paralysis? Delicately, silently, you grabbed the first blunt object within reach. A chemistry book that Peter seemed particularly fond of. The figure stepped on the ceiling as you were paralyzed. The form turned to land on the ground and then stood up, still with its back to you. You got up gently from Peter's bed and walked over. The man in the suit whose color you couldn't see took off his mask and you hit the air in an attempt to shoot him down. Peter turned around so quickly and blocked your gesture easily, like a reflex.

 "What the ..."

"Bloody hell".

 You both said at the same time. Your big surprised eyes mirrored Peter's. The curly man let go of your hand with an apologetic expression as you walked away from your friend. You turned on the bedside lamp before you discovered his blue and red costume. A very recognizable costume since it was that of Spider-Man. You winced, a look of judgment and incomprehension on your face. Not bothering to look at his face covered with bruises and traces of blood.

 "What the ... are you sneaking out to go to a costume party?"

"What?! No…No Y/N I’m…”

“Spider-Man? Great costume by the way” you joked.

 For a moment, you completely forgot that you just saw your friend glued upside down to the ceiling. Peter looked at you a little jaded, by the tone of your voice your guess was far from a sincere question but more of a mockery. And right now, the young man needed to be honest with you. He needed you.

 "But, I am."

"Yeah that's it. And I slept with the Winter Soldier. You can't imagine what he can do with his metal arm."

 Peter cut you off by pulling a web with his web shooter, tying your hands. The feel of the canvas was unpleasant, sticky but above all resistant. You let out a little cry of surprise, not powerful enough to pass the walls of Peter's room. Your eyes looked like two big golf balls, realizing that your friend was telling the truth.

 "Omg, You're Spider-Man" you almost spoke too loud.

"Yes and don't make me web your mouth. May doesn't have to know"

"damn, peter. What happened to your face!"

“yeah about that…I need you Y/N, please…”

  And without warning, Peter squeezed the spider in the middle of his costume, at chest level. He winced at the action revealing his bruised chest. He staggered a bit from the action, unsure of his legs and the pain in his sides fierce. You might see several bruises and cuts on your friend's body. You were having difficulty swallowing before you told him you were going to the bathroom to get what you needed. Before leaving the room, he made you promise to be discreet and not tell May anything if she ran into you. When you walk back into Peter's room, he's sitting half-lying on his bed, grimacing. You sit next to him, your heart pounding. You never noticed that he was so built. After all, as a superhero, he had to keep fit. But you couldn't deny that it intimidated you. Your cheeks were burning with embarrassment and a desire you never knew before. He had his eyes closed, as if trying to make the pain go away. And there, looking at him, you found him pretty. he was so cute that you couldn't help but run your hand through his curls to signal your presence and soothe him a bit. But Peter already knew you were there. He had heard your footsteps, he had smelled your scent, a sweet scent he had grown used to in his later years. He sighed softly, more relaxed. You started to clean the few shallow wounds.

 "Does it hurt?" you asked quietly

"Mhmm no, not really."

"Did you win?"

"Ouch..No. Not tonight."

"Sorry." you said more for your gesture rather than the fact that he didn't win the fight against the bad guys.

"No, it's perfect ... it's just a little sensitive"

 You smiled but something was wrong. A feeling you've never felt before. You've finished cleaning up Peter's wounds, but your gaze has darkened. As you were about to get up, the brunette gently grabbed your wrist to hold you back. He could hear your calm breathing and yet your heart was racing. He could feel the heat on your cheeks. He too felt that the tension was at its height. Your mind was muddled, he didn't know why, he wasn't a telepath, but he could see it, feel it. Your body betrayed your mind.

 "Y/N, what is it?"

"I..I don't know." you lied.

"You can tell me everything."

"I ... Well…Seeing you like this ... makes me ... makes me realize that I ... I'm afraid of losing you."

"You won't lose me ... I promise"

 You are ashamed of your vulnerable state. How did you go from hating this boy to having an overwhelming fear of losing him? You looked at those chocolate eyes in confusion and distress. You were now fully aware that the little neighborhood spider was none other than your childhood friend. The one you once loved to hate, tease, fight with over trivia. He was also on the youtube videos, who stopped cars with his bare hands.

 “Y/N… you won’t lose me, I promise.”

 Peter dared to walk slowly towards you and in a surge of courage, one of his hands circled your burning cheek, his lips rested on yours. The brunette had always had a crush on you without actually admitting it. After all, you had known each other since you were children but... your relationship had been rather confrontational. But for two years now, everything had changed for him. He appreciated more and more your little arguments, your teasing. His thoughts would sometimes turn darker when you lick your lips or when your fingers scratched that point behind your ear, when you were a little stressed.

 Your lips moved between them in a harmonious dance and you were now clinging desperately to Peter's slightly sweaty brown curls. Your heart was pounding at a speed close to the point of no return, reluctant to stop suddenly in the face of this overstimulation. But all good things came to an end and you slowly walked away. You bit your lip to get the taste of Peter's back. Your mind wandered, lost in the haze of rushing feelings.

 "You..you should rest ..."

 You ended up pulling away, swallowing hard. That night you didn't sleep. You have studied every facial feature of Peter, thinking of every event since your friendship. The next day, you fooled that nothing had happened. Too scared of what that kiss meant to you.

 Summer 2025

It all happened so quickly. After that summer, the summer of your kiss, you promised yourself that you understood your feelings towards Peter. You weren't going to the same high school and even though you were both on social media, you never dared to contact him. You needed time.

 But you haven't had this time. Peter became full-time Spider-Man and then the aliens came to earth, again. The threat of Thanos hovered and within moments, days, hours ... you were gone under his snap.

 When you returned to your childhood apartment, you were alone. Well, alone in front of the family who lived in this place now. The man in his forties simply believed you were a drug-hunting teenager squatter. Five damn years had passed. 5 years where your mother had a new life when you had been eclipsed. You were distraught, alone and it was by happy coincidence that you found May at the F.E.A.S.T project. It was a relief for you to find a familiar face again. She had suggested that you come and live in her new temporary apartment, allowing you to finish high school without having to move to the other end of the United States, with your mother. You declined your offer. You wanted to fend for yourself. And surprisingly, you did pretty well.

 To be exact, Mr. Delmar was looking for a student to work in his store and was kind enough to greet you in the bedroom of one of his daughters who had gone to college. By the greatest of luck, you've never seen Peter. Or rather, you managed to avoid it for an entire year. You had caught a glimpse of him one day, trying to speak Italian to get a travel adapter and a dual headphone adapter. Did you feel foolish thinking that after so long - could we consider those 5 years to be 5 concrete years? - would it still focus on the kiss you shared? After all, you got away from him after that. And then, everything went in a state of madness.

 Every time you turned on the television, you learned that elemental monsters had attacked a different country. They had first started with Mexico and then moved to Europe. Italy, Prague and then London. A certain Mysterio seemed to be taking care of this matter, but you couldn't help but think of Peter. May told you he was supposed to go to Italy. In fact, every time she went to Delmar's for a sandwich, she gave you an update on her nephew's trip. But it wasn't the craziest.

 Upon his return ... Spider-man's identity was revealed. You had watched in horror the video of Mysterio, which appeared on the Daily Buggle newspaper, accusing Peter of wanting to be the new Iron-Man. You were listening to J. Jonah Jameson falsely accusing Peter of being a murderer. You knew Peter, and there was no way he had done such an act. The video was bogus, you were sure. When you tried to reconnect that summer, you noticed Peter's girlfriend. Michelle Jones and ... and that's what kept you from approaching him. He was already supported. He had his best friend, Ned. His girlfriend, MJ. And he had May. It was enough, wasn't it?

  It was the following year, after a new incredible adventure that you met again.

You worked at the store in the evening. Mr Delmar had asked you to help him out urgently because his youngest daughter had a health problem. You accepted with pleasure. You had offered to babysit his daughter but the loving father he was wanted to be with her. And it was precisely this evening that a thug decided to steal the fund from you.

 You were at gunpoint with your hands up in the air when you saw a red and black mass fall behind the thug.

 "Hey buddy, I think the bank is across the street"

 Spider-Man tapped the thief on the shoulder and dodged a punch.

 "But I think I'll arrest you anyway if you went to the bank. You don't seem like a nice guy." Peter joked.

 You were paralyzed as your friend, your best friend if you were honest, chained or avoided them with agility. You swallowed hard, unable to move or run away. A gunshot rang out and you smelled a scared little vintage. Peter squeezed the barrel of the gun in his hand, deviating from his course. It made sense now to say that he had simply defended himself against the assault. After a few seconds that seemed like an eternity, Peter stared the offender against a fridge door, immobilizing him. He then turned to you, oblivious to your identity at the time.

 "Are you okay there?"

"Peter!"

 You didn't give him the chance to realize and you rushed into his arms, hugging him so tight to feel the comfort of his body against yours.

 "Uh, yeah, you're welcome. Cuddles are nice but ..."

 He paused for a moment and his automated eyes widened. He knew his perfume. The flowery, sweet scents that he had missed so much. Is this possible?

 "Y/N?"

 You let go of him and immediately put his mask back on. Adrenaline was controlling your actions and god damn it, you needed that touch. You kissed him, bluntly. Your lips crushed against his in impatience, in ardor, but too bad. You needed to feel it against you, to regain the feeling that you had felt, years ago. After a few seconds, you felt Peter's hands encircle your waist, pulling you closer to him. Your heart was exploding, the ardor was present in your kiss. You were even frustrated that you couldn't grab her brown curls with full hands, settling for only the base of her hair. You let out a moan before pulling away abruptly. He had a girlfriend.

 "I… I'm sorry. I… Sorry, I didn't mean… MJ… and… please don't blame me."

 Peter silenced you with another kiss, shorter this time but so good.

 “There is no MJ .... Just you and me ... Far Longer Than Forever”

 You looked at him hopefully and then burst out laughing after his words.

 "I didn't know you were so romantic, Parker"

"Shut your mouth."

"Make me"

"You are impossible."

"But obviously, you like"

 He was going to say something to nag you, he was looking for it but you caught him off guard, placing your lips on his again. You could feel his smile in the kiss and you couldn't help but do the same. Anyone living in the neighborhood present in the street would have a view of Spider-Man kissing the student cashier from Delmar. But you couldn't care less. You had waited too long and the joy you were feeling now was so intense, you didn't want to stop feeling this. It is reluctantly that Peter moved away from you apologizing for the fact that he had to go on patrol again.

 "Go save the Spider-Man neighborhood"

"Only if you promise me you'll be there when I get back."

"I was thinking of going to say goodnight to May instead ... But if you want, I have a sleeping bag in the storeroom."

"You are incorrigible .... See you later ..."

"See you later."

 You smiled, in a misty state of bliss as Peter disappeared from view. This time, you weren't planning to escape, you wanted to fall into the webs of Peter Parker. You closed the store after the police visit and headed to May's flat. It was late but with her kindness she welcomed you with open arms.

 This summer ... was the best in years but the others to come were going to be even more wonderful.