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startrekfangirl2233-writes · 2 months

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Summer 2020 - The Hard Deck

Chapter 8 Part 1 of You Are My Soulmate

Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw x Reader

Description: Two months. Sometimes you can't believe you've already been dating Bradley Bradshaw, the most perfect man you've ever met and your soulmate, for that long. But with the pressures of being officers in the Navy and everything your jobs entail, you haven't taken your relationship to the next step. When a night at The Hard Deck has you seeing green, you decide enough is enough. Bradley is your soulmate and you're going to make sure he knows just how much you love him.

Disclaimers: Misogynistic speech. Mentioned Homosexual Relationships. Angst. Flagrant disregard for protocols or Authority. Angst. Anguish.

This content presented in this story is for audiences age 18 and over only. MINORS DNI. I will not be accepting tag-list requests from Blank or Ageless Blogs for this story.

Warnings: Female!Reader

Word Count: 4051

A/N: Hiya lovelies! I'm back with yet another chapter of YAMS! My muse sort of went into hibernation between March and now, but never fear, this fic is not on hiatus! I hope you all love this chapter as much as I do!

AO3: Cross-posted Here!

Wattpad: Cross-posted Here!

My Masterlist

Previous Part | Series Masterlist | Next Part

Tinkerbell

It’s been only a little under a year since you came to North Island. So much has changed over that time. The biggest change? Finding Bradley Bradshaw. You can’t believe you once wished anyone else could be your soulmate. Now, you’re not sure you could wish for anyone else. It feels like your entire outlook on life has changed, because you’re not sure you could go back to the person who wasn’t quickly falling in love with their soulmate.

Bradley Bradshaw is different now, too. When he’s not on base, he’s sweet and kind, considerate in a way you’d agreed he wouldn’t be when you were on duty. A part of the reason why is because nobody on base (except your best friends) knows that Bradley Bradshaw is your soulmate. Neither of you is in a rush to put a label on what you are either. Jake and Javy have both asked you, repeatedly, whether you're together, but you can’t tell them not when you’re not sure what is going on between you and your soulmate. After your contentious first few months at North Island, you’re a little afraid to ask Bradley, as well. What if that question makes everything devolve between the two of you? What if you go back to the fighting? You’re not sure you can go back to how it used to be between the two of you, with tension rising in the air between you. You think Bradley feels the same as you do. You hope he does. While you can still see the disbelief on his face sometimes when you kiss him, like he can’t believe he’s yours, you’re still not sure.

The rumor mill around North Island hasn’t helped anything. It’s obvious the newest Top Gun class has heard the rumors of the last few months. It should be a blessing they haven’t focused on the events leading up to Hawk’s inquiry and its aftermath. Instead, they’ve chosen to focus on what is going on (or may be going on) between you and Bradley. No doubt they’ve heard from Calypso, who was as gossipy as could be, before coming to North Island. You’ve witnessed it yourself, how the LTJG gossip network works. How else would news of the great Maverick’s latest brush with the Admiralty become the next talked about thing when you’re on board a ship for months at a time? Now every interaction you have with the Dagger Squadron is examined with a fine-toothed comb when superior officers aren’t present. You’ve heard some truly ridiculous things at this point, just by walking past the lounge.

“Have you seen how Tinkerbell is with Phoenix and Bob? I’m pretty sure she’s fucking both of them in addition to Bradshaw. The question is if they know or if she’s cheating on each of them with the others?”

As if that wasn’t ridiculous enough, it seems like you’re rumored to be romantically linked to almost every Dagger you speak to.

“Okay, but have you seen how she acts with Coyote and Hangman? If she gets any closer to them when they’re off duty, she’d be on top of them.”

“I bet you 50, she is!”

“I’d take that bet, but Hangy’s too buttoned up for that!”

If only it were just the Dagger Squad you’ve been rumored to be in a relationship with.

“She’s totally got an April-September thing going on with Admiral Mitchell! You’ve seen him napping on the sofa in front of her desk! Why else would an Admiral be in the AMDO hangar?”

Your favorite rumors of all, though, are the ones about Bradley and you.

“Bradshaw has to be who she is dating! He smiles so much when she’s around him! There’s this tension between the two of them all the time! If they’re not head over heels for each other, then I think I need a vacation (or my radar is broken).”

“That’s a shame, Jiffy! Are you a WSO or aren’t you?”

“Fuck you, Toast! Anyways, like I was saying, they’ll be fucking before we graduate from Top Gun!”

They’re your favorite rumors because they’re the ones most likely to come true, not that any of the class will come to know, especially not Toast and Jiffy, from whom you heard that last parlay.

It’s the turmoil of being known as Bradley Bradshaw’s soulmate which has had you in a tailspin since the aftermath of that all too successful first date. Can you be known as his? Yes. Do you want to be known as his? Yes and no. That’s about where your feelings and thoughts get complicated. You’d love to scream “Bradley Bradshaw is my soulmate” from the rooftops. But you’re also tired of the double standard. You get enough of it as is, being a successful female, AMDO Lieutenant Commander in the US Navy. The words Bradley had flung at you that first night on North Island (the ones he has apologized for a hundred times)? You’ve heard them more times than you can count. You’re sure you’ll hear them again. But you’re also sure that if the news of you and Bradley being soulmates gets out, every achievement of your career will be in question.

Despite all of the leading research in the world, nobody fully understands how far and deep soulmate bonds go. After all, it’s difficult to, when there are as many types of bonds as there are and even more types of soul markers. You and your soul shared dreams, centered around different objects integral to your soul's identity. Your parents only heard the music the other was listening to until they met. Jake and Javy hold each other’s names on their skin, written out in each other's handwriting. It seems like each type of bond holds a different type of connection, too. In the two months since you and Bradley crashed together, opening the bond, you’ve begun to feel his emotions, get a sense of what he's thinking. Nobody knows how the bond will evolve, but you’re sure it could evolve into a full telepathic bond given time. If anyone were to know, they’d assume your talent with fighter jets came from your soul. They’d find it hard to believe you knew anything of your own. The thoughts have you questioning yourself just a little, too. Before you met him, who knows how much of the bond was open? How much of your success was due to him and how much of it was due to your own hard work?

Thankfully, you have Mav and Ice to confide in and counsel you. Their advice and reassurances have gone a long way in helping you sort out exactly how and when you want your bond publicized. As it turns out, you weren’t the only person to be shocked when they found out Ice and Mav are each other’s soulmates. It’s probably the US Navy’s best kept secret, to be clear. Very few people know, mostly family and commanding officers. You’ve even had the chance to view their public files. There is only a singular line mentioning their bond in each file, stating the words Soulbound, Married followed by the other’s initials.

The way Mav tells it, keeping each other hidden, keeping their bond quiet, has been the biggest help of their careers. Ice would have never been able to protect Mav over the years if their bond had been widely publicized. Of course, like most things in life, it wasn't easy. But it's the price they've each paid time and again to be with each other in spite of their dual need to succeed in their chosen fields.

Bradley and you've talked about it, too. It wasn’t a unilateral decision on either of your parts. You both have goals in your careers you are trying to achieve. So you're trying to follow the same precedent and example. But despite Mav’s warnings, you weren’t expecting keeping your distance from Bradley Bradshaw to be quite so difficult. At work, it's not as big a deal, staying away from each other. It feels like you couldn’t behave in any other way, honestly. Every motion is choreographed, governed by the muscle memory of bodies conditioned by the US Navy into holding themselves a certain way, responding in a certain way.

Unfortunately, the two of you act the same way when you're alone. When you're at home or at Mav and Ice's house, you melt into him, kiss him, hold him like you've been aching to for your whole life. But when you’re out and about in San Diego, he keeps a constant distance between you. He doesn’t slip his arm around your shoulder or your waist, kiss your cheek or shoulder or any of the hundreds of little ways couples you see on the street show their love for each other. You know it’s part and parcel of your pact. But it still makes you feel like a dirty little secret when you know you’re anything but. At least Bradley still kisses you like he believes you are going to disappear if he blinks. Each embrace, each brush of his lips against your skin sparks an inferno. But that is it. As soon as his lips meet your skin, they're gone again.

For weeks you've been feeling the itch under your skin, begging you to get closer to your soul. You're craving intimacy, a need to imprint yourself on his skin so deep he'll never forget who he belongs to. You might not be able to show it publicly, but privately, you’re ready to stake your claim. You know how gorgeous your soul is, inside and out. After all, you have eyes. You would never have noticed him the first night at the Hard Deck all those months ago if it weren’t for his charisma and looks. If only there was a way you could show him, in front of anyone who matters.

It doesn’t help that you can’t even kiss him when you’re off duty most of the time, because you inevitably find yourselves at The Hard Deck with the rest of the Dagger Squadron. There are too many eyes on you, on the Dagger Squadron when you’re there. They’re practically famous, and with Naval personnel other than the Daggers around, you can’t risk anything. When the Daggers are involved, things always seem to get turned on their heads. They are an affectionate squadron, closer to family than colleagues, preferring to hug each other with impunity. After all, you’ve seen the puppy-pile the lot of them turn into after a particularly rough training session at the behest of Mav. So it’s no wonder the rumors fly as fast and furiously about them as they do.

Anti-fraternization regulations are one thing. The badge bunnies and the odd bachelorette parties who wander into the Hard Deck for fun with some men and women in uniform are something else entirely. With enough alcohol, they flirt with anyone in sight. It’s no wonder they flirt as much as they do with your soulmate. They fall over themselves when he sits at the piano at the end of the bar, a flirty smile on his lips as he tickles the ivory keys and sings with his gorgeous voice. He’s your soulmate. You know it in your soul, just as you know all the reasons why Bradley would never pick one of them. But logic and reasoning don’t keep you from seeing red whenever other women flirt with your man.

It’s late, half-past 11 at the very least, with the time ticking closer to midnight with every elapsed second. All the regulars have mostly cleared out tonight, leaving only the Daggers, you, and a few scantily-clad girls in the bar. The Daggers are often the first to enter the bar when it opens and the last to leave. Right now, they’re all arrayed at the pool tables, talking shit and taking shots with the cues in turn. Penny’s behind the bar, like always, though even she seems less than pleased by the high-pitched giggling from the bachelorette party tottering about on too high heels. You hope she’s at least getting good tips from their repeated squeals for shots.

Bradley’s the only Dagger not at the pool tables. Even Bob with his ever-present can of soda and cup of peanuts is over there. If you focus, you think you can hear him roasting Jake in that quiet understated way of his. But most of your focus is on the badge bunny draped across Bradley’s broad chest. She stinks of cheap tequila, you could probably smell her from a mile away, and only the sash draped around her proclaiming her to be the maid-of-honor explains why she’s in this bar. What’s pissing you off just a little more than how this slut is draped over your soulmate is how she barely seems to care how you’re right there. You’ve been standing next to Bradley all night long, closer than is proper for colleagues. His hand’s been looped through one of the belt-loops on your jeans all night too, hidden behind the high table, palm scorching as it rests just over the swell of your ass. What part of your posture screams “This man is single”? If that wasn’t enough, he’d been leaning into your face as you chatted in intimate whispers barely audible over the music.

She’d barged right into the middle of your conversation, tossing her hair and batting her eyelashes. Even now, she’s flirting and giggling, the high-pitched noises making you wince, putting you so thoroughly on edge that you feel like you’re seconds from snapping. You sigh when she finally stumbles away, her heels clacking clumsily over the sticky floor. You could do without the come-hither eyes she sends Bradley’s way, but at least Bradley doesn’t seem to notice. His attention is on you, like it has been all night.

“Fuck,” His voice is rough, the sound wrapping around you in a way that makes your panties just a little wet. “I’m sorry about that, sweetheart.”

He tugs you in a little closer by your belt loops, the motion soothing the ragged edges of your nerves as the Sandalwood of his cologne drowns you.

“She just wouldn’t go away!”

He drags his hand, the one with his US Naval Academy ring with its garnet gem through his curls as he downs the last few sips of his beer. You track a droplet as it drips down his cut jaw, and desperately want to kiss your soul once again. Of course, that feeling is drowned by more rage as you catch the cow-eyes little miss Maid-of-Honor is making in her sparkly hot pink dress on the other side of the bar.

It makes you a little reckless as you spit words out, trying to provoke an argument, something to make your soul realize little things like a woman flirting with him, touching him, bothers you.

“Hmm… I wonder why, Roo?” You roll your eyes and stamp your foot a little. “Maybe it’s ‘cause you looked happy to have her wrapped around you?”

He recoils at your words and vitriolic tone, a puppy-dog pout dragging the corners of his mouth down for just a few seconds before resettling his lips into his most charming grin. It’s too charming for words, eroding at the edges of your anger just enough to make her flirting seem less troubling than it is.

“Is everything okay, Tink?” His hand slides up, rubbing at your hip in slow circles, but you’re not willing to give in. “C’mon baby, tell me what I did wrong. I can’t fix it if I don’t know.”

You gulp the last bit of your margarita in response before shoving the glass into his chest.

“It’s nothing, Roo. I’m fine. Just a little thirsty, that’s all.”

Your excuse is slim at best. You know it. So does he by the quirk in his brow as he looks at you.

“We’ll talk about this when you’re ready.”

Maybe it’s the bond working to let him know when you’re not ready to talk. But when he grabs his empty beer bottle and your martini glass and turns around to walk back to the bar, your irrational anger rears its ugly little head again. Because there she is in all of her glory, whispering with one of her friends, waving him over with red-taloned fingers while seductively staring at your soul. She’s obviously noticed the swagger in his hips just as much as you have. If only she’d noticed your glower in her direction, a gaze which is quickly turning into a piercing glare. You’re not trying to pick a fight, tonight. It's not Bradley's fault that women find him irresistible. You just want your soul to know she bothers you. And you want her to know he’s not hers to seduce into her bed just because he’s hot.

So your tone is artificially light as you call out, just loud enough over the din that Bradley hears you.

“You don’t even know you’re doing it, huh?”

“Doing what?” He sounds confused, adorably so.

“I mean, it’s obvious you haven’t spent any time on a farm.”

You grin from ear-to-ear, fighting the urge to fist-bump the air, when he turns around, out of the line of sight of little miss Maid-of-Honor at the other end of the bar. He thuds the empties down and crosses his arms across his chest, the muscles bulging mouth-wateringly in front of you. It’s obvious he knows what you’re up to based on the amused quirk to his lips, but he’s playing along regardless.

“And you have?”

There’s a sparkle in his eyes as he looks down at you. Your grin could be called positively wicked in response.

“Sure I have! Seresin Ranch is an awful lot of fun at Christmas-time!” You tug one of the chairs over and sit down in it, keeping the high table between you and your soulmate. “You know what else they have at Seresin Ranch?”

“Lemme take a quick guess here…”

His eyebrows raise as he pretends to think.

“Chickens?”

“Yup!”

You relish in the shape of your lips as you pop the ‘p’ in your too cheeky response to him.

“And there is one ole Rooster in the flock, too. And you know how he walks? Especially when he’s got a hen he’s wooing?”

“Just like I do?” Your lips quirk at the disappointment on his face, destroying the mock thoughtful pout you'd sent your soul's way moments before. When a smile sneaks onto his lips unwillingly, you giggle. He looks fondly exasperated at the sight of your glee, but takes a step closer to you.

“God, Tinky! If I hadn’t been right here all night, I would’ve been asking you just how much you’ve had to drink tonight!”

You can’t find it in you to respond, the thoughts flitting past at lightning speed. It feels like you’re magnetized to his presence. One of his big hands wraps around your hip as he comes to stand between your open legs. He’s a lot, all of a sudden, standing there so close. It’s a little overwhelming. You can’t keep your eyes off of his face, eyes straying repeatedly over the little laugh lines stamped at the corner of his eyes and the way his lips are spit-slicked and a little chapped. You’re so close to him, you’d be kissing him if you pressed upwards just a little more. But somehow, you can’t bring yourself to.

“You’re jealous.”

Everything in you screams you should deny the statement. But you can’t lie. The bond would tell him what your face hasn’t already.

“C-can you blame me?”

The words leave you in a puff of breath, barely audible over the clinking glasses and the whir of the jukebox in the corner.

“Why would you be jealous? I promise there’s no reason for you to be jealous. I promise, sweetheart.” There’s something almost knowing in his face.

“I - I should believe you, Bradley, but I don’t. There's no reason why I shouldn't be jealous of the girls who flirt with you who look like that.” You want to believe him, but the words aren't reassuring in the slightest. “E - especially when I know I’ve never once looked like that on my best days, forget my worst.”

He cups your cheek in his big hand, his skin hot against yours.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful, sweetheart.” He sighs, then, pressing his forehead against yours. “And you don’t even know it, do you? That first night? When you were chatting with Penny at the bar wearing that sundress? I couldn’t keep my eyes off of you. I was tracking you all night. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you ever since. You have a way of taking over the room with your presence. You’re so sure of who you are and what you’re capable of. You’ve never shied about going after what you want. I admire that about you. I adore that about you.”

“So trust me, beautiful, when I say you have nothing to worry about. You never have and you never will. I know it in my very soul.”

This? This is exactly why it took less than two months for you to fall head-over-heels in love with your soulmate. He always seems to know what to say to make you see things in a different way. All of a sudden, it feels like there isn’t anyone else in the room. The noise of the jukebox, of the Daggers squabbling in the background fades away. All you want in that moment is your soul. But just before you fling yourself into his arms, the shattering of glass jolts you out of your feelings. You're too close to Bradley Bradshaw - too close for a pair of colleagues sharing a late night drink after a long day. Were you both anywhere else, you would have kissed him already, given your preoccupation with the taste of him, the scent of him, the feel of him.

Instead, you murmur, “I'm heading out, Roo. I've got this terrible headache and I should probably turn in early for the night.”

You know he's looking at you with those big, deep brown eyes, trying to get you to meet his gaze, convince you to stay for another drink, another chat, another laugh. But you can’t. You're at the end of your rope. If you were to fall now, loosen your grip on the chains keeping you in check, it would result in the destruction of your efforts. The Daggers barely acknowledge your goodbyes, too absorbed by the game of pool happening before their eyes. Penny wraps you in a motherly embrace as you pay your tab, enquiring fussily if you need her to call a cab. With every move you make, you feel eyes on you. You know exactly who it is, your soul, watching eagle-eyed as you collect your bag and walk out to your car. You know it’s that old Bradshaw chivalry rearing its head, something Mav told you Goose had exhibited with Carole his whole life.

So, of course, you're not alone in the sea-perfumed night air for long. Footsteps disturbing gravel follow you as soon as you step out of the pool of light cast by The Hard Deck’s lamps, hints of sandalwood scent curling around you on the breeze.

“C'mon, sweetheart. Don't I even get a kiss goodnight?” He's wheedling, enticing. Damn him, because you ache for his skin in a way you're not sure you could ever voice. He’s weakening your resolve with every step in your direction.

“There isn't even anybody watching!”

“Who said I was saying goodnight, Roo?”

The shell-shocked look on his face makes you giggle as you start your car and drive away from The Hard Deck. The roads are deserted, but not for long. Only seconds later, you hear the growl of an engine and smile at the sight of a blue truck pulling up behind you. Your phone chirps with a text as you idle at a stoplight.

This time, I'm not letting you go.

This time, you muse as the light changes, you don’t intend to let him walk out the door so easily.

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN ON TUMBLR, WATTPAD, OR AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN ON TUMBLR, WATTPAD, OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

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#star writes #top gun fanfic #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick fanfic #top gun maverick fanfiction #you are my soulmate #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #rooster x reader #bradley bradshaw x reader #soulmate!au #miscommunication

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churipu · 9 months

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rules !

( 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖 )

I.) basic dni criteria , do not go into my ask to excessively hate on me or my writings ★ my blog is a sfw blog, so please refrain from requesting anything related to nsfw or 18+ topics.

II.) (feel free to block me and do not interact with me if you support isr@el) // you like reading and writing shit like incest, stepcest, p links post (especially with minor characters) — in other words, i'm telling you to go seek help. ty.

[ ✓ ] i write my requests based on who requested first, so if yours is taking long, just know that i'm not ignoring nor deleting your request (sometimes i accidentally put your requests on the queue list — and i don't know how to edit it, so your request will still be posted in the form of a screenshot! sorry) -> update: i finally know how :D !

[ ✓ ] if your request hasn't been posted for a long time, I apologize but it probably means that i'm not going to write it. but for specific reasons, either i didn't know the prompt you're referring to or i just didn't know how to write the prompt. i'm sorry :(

III.) my works are completely sfw, suggestive at most. they are appropriate for people 16+.

( 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 )

I.) i absolutely hate blocking people, but i'm setting boundaries to my blog and i as a person, so please respect that.

blocked ! i will not hesitate to block the accounts who are as the following criteria:

[ ✓ ] if you make and post porn links, HARD BLOCK. idk why they're even a thing, no offense lol. i don't mind if you write / reblog nsfw works (as long as they don't contain illegal things) bcs that's up to you really, but porn links are different and they're a big ick.

[ ✓ ] blank blogs. blank blogs. blank blogs. at least put your age, please. convince me that you are not a bot.

[ ✓ ] if you're here to hate on my writing — especially when you decide to hide behind the anon feature to do so. i mean, if you have anything to say to me, the least you could do is to have the balls to say it directly to me without hiding behind the anon feature, thankies <33

[ ✓ ] incest/step-cest, that shit is weird as hell. don't even try lol, i'm not even asking anymore atp, i'm implying for you to go get help if you write + read those.

[ ✓ ] i hope you know the difference between constructive criticism and straight on hating. i appreciate constructive criticism of my writing and how i can grow my blog — but i do wish you won't straight up blow hate on me and hide behind "constructive criticism", because honestly, that's just embarrassing :(

[ ✓ ] plagiarism. plagiarism. plagiarism. pretty self-explanatory. just no.

( 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐃 )

I.) my first language is not english, i apologize for any grammar mistakes or typos! do tell me if you see any mistakes so i can immediately correct it, thank you.

II.) my blog and i am pro palestine. i reblog support to palestine a lot, block me immediately if you support isr@el in any kind of form and way ! thank you very much.

III.) i do not want to write smut for this blog, so please do not send in requests that contain smut for any characters in any kind of way. i'm honestly fine with a little suggestiveness, but full on smut is just a big no to me as of now (bcs i can't write them lmao), sorry :((

IV.) i try to keep the reader in my fics gender neutral, but if they're not, the gender of the reader will be said at the top.

V.) i don't have an updating schedule, i try to update at least once after a day. i'm currently in my fourth semester of uni, and things are currently a little hectic — but i'm trying to fit in updating daily into my schedule, so please refrain from rushing me to update. thank you!

VI.) DO NOT spam like please. tumblr will probably think that my account is a bot and possibly put me in the shadow realm :/ likes + reblogs are very appreciated, thank you :(

VII.) hate anons / cowards who hide behind the anon feature will be deleted (or posted) none in between lmao

VIII.) mutuals that want to cut contact with me -> keep in mind to HARD BLOCK my account, don't soft block me or unfollow me and just leave it at that. HARD BLOCK ME.

[ ✓ ] keep in mind that if i hard block any of you to cut the mutual line, do not try to reach me out from another account because you'll be blocked in that account as well.

[ ✓ ] i don't block people without a reason — if i block you, there must have been a reason to WHY i did that. that's your part to find out why though, because i don't want anything else to do with you.

[ ✓ ] please do not associate me with people i used to follow / supported before or were mutuals before, i associate with people i follow NOW. thank you :)

[ ✓ ] if you think i've blocked you but you don't post any contents included in my blocklist or you don't fit in those criteria, please try to reach out through another account and i will apologize sincerely for my mistake + unblock your other account.

( 𝐃𝐌𝐬 )

I.) if you have a problem with me, i appreciate if you reach out to me through my dms :)

II.) i am open to talk about anything as long as you're respectful, but please don't interact with me if you are under the age of 16.

( 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐋𝐘 )

I.) i hope you enjoy my writings, do tell me and educate me nicely if i do anything wrong! thank you.

[ ✓ ] i do appreciate it if you tell me about problematic blogs whose works i have reblogged or am currently associated with too, i don't really keep up with a lot of things and tend to follow up really late and i would usually find out WHEN things appear in my dashboard. if my ask box is closed, please reach out to me through my dms ! thanks !

finished reading? you can now proceed to my masterlist !

#𝜗𝜚 𝓘pin's rules ˚⋆#𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆.

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velvet-vox · 4 months

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My Top 10 Favourite Male Villains of all time.

"How arrogant of you to think that any of us are anything but irrelevant". -John Greer, Person of Interest (2011-2016).

There comes a moment in a blog's life where some things are just long overdue, and while the argument could be made that this happened way too early, I'd say that as long as this helps me to find my groove, I am free to experiment as much as I want.

So..... Villains.

Gotta love them. As long as I do not meet them in real life. This post is in particular about male villains since I have one dedicated to their female counterparts in the pipeline so expect that to come soon enough and for this part to be rewritten. By the way, "villain" is a generalisation, I can totally put antivillains, antagonists or more general antiheroes in this list; your definition of "Bad Guy" can vary greatly and so can mine, someone like Walter White from Breaking Bad could have made it in here. My taste is very unusual, so prepare yourself for some unexpected picks.

Also, since these are meant to be some big celebratory posts, for the occasion I'll reveal my Italian heritage and translate every line of dialogue in Italian and publish it separately with a link, so that English readers who are learning Italian can exercise.

But first, some honourable mentions:

Oropo (Wakfu): Once you see the number 2 spot for both this list and the female villains list you might notice that I tend to gravitate towards characters with wasted potential more often than not, but while we're just talking about this guy, I cannot stress enough the amount of unceremonious mishandling that lies within his concepts and execution. Really needed two seasons of 25 episodes each to explore it to their maximum.

Tai Lung (Kung Fu Panda): I love him, but not as much as others, it's a matter of personal preference. He's an amazing antagonist, so even if he is just an honourable mention, I wouldn't call him a lesser villain by any stretch of the imagination; I once felt like he was too sympathetic for his movie's sake, but looking back at it again, he's actually moderately evil for a lot of reasons, even if Shifu is the main one.

Bill Chyper (Gravity Falls): It's been way too long since I watched Gravity Falls, I really can't give you an accurate opinion on this guy anymore.

Flintheart Glomgold (DuckTales 2017): That season 2 episode. If you know what I'm talking about, you KNOW. Also the music for that whole sequence was a banger, really driving home the deranged nature of that twist reveal.

Big Jack Horner (Puss in Boots The Last Wish): I feel like when people praise Jack for being a breath of fresh air in a stale environment, they often forget just how good of a villain he was in his own right without the larger industry wide void of truly devious antagonists that act out of pure malice.

The Wolf (Puss in Boots The Last Wish): Two villain entries from one movie? Of course it was gonna be The Last Wish, what else could it be? Honestly I don't even wanna talk about this guy, you need to experience the movie for yourself.

Rob (The Amazing World of Gumball): Everything I have to say about this guy gets talked about much better by the number 6 Spot on this list, but as it stands Rob was my first villain OTP and the guy who opened the box of Pandora for me on what an antagonist could and should be, since then my perception of villainy only widened and now I enjoy their role in a story in much different way.

And now, with that out of the way, let's finally start with the ranking of my personal favourite male villains of all time.

Major spoilers down below:

Number 10: Silco (Arcane)

This guy is the reason that brought me to specify who or what counted for this list as trying to simplify Silco into one specific group of characters is a challenge that can only end in a misunderstanding of what makes Silco such a complex and fascinating character with an amazing character arc, that ends with him not being redeemed, mind you, but allows the audience to grieve in such a way that would make a side character death jealous.

When writing an antagonistic character, Silco is my goal and high standard, and just for that he deserves all of my respect and endless praise.

Now, admittedly, Silco's arc takes a while to kick in, but it works out to his advantage by the end of it since you don't realise just how much you've grown to care for him until he's dead and you're left with the surprise.

10 out 10, the nation of Zaun would have been much better (worse) with him than with Vander.

Number 9: The Riddler (DC)

The Riddler is literally my ride or die villain, when I'm in the mood for him, he's literally my favourite antagonist ever; when I am not in the mood for him, I completely forget about his existence.

When compared to many other entries on this list, Riddler is definitely more on the pop culture side of antagonism, and when you've been around for almost a century, you tend to have many different versions of the same character written by different writers, so I wanted to highlight here my favourite versions of him:

Arkham Games: He's hilarious. He's not my ideal Riddler, but whenever he comes on screen, his whiny rat's ass voice stimulates my pheromones.

Batman The Animated Series: I've heard somewhere that this version of him is disappointing, and to that I'll say... yeah, but only when he wasn't on screen, because otherwise, he kind of slayed.

Matt Reeves The Batman: This is the version that rekindled my love for him after so long. Out of every interpretation of The Riddler throughout the years, this is the one version that treated Edward more as a character rather than an obstacle for Batman to overcome, and for that I'll be eternally grateful.

LEGO Batman The Videogame: My very first introduction to The Riddler and the Batman universe as a whole, this version has a permanent place in my heart , I love how much information and emotion you can get out of him by just looking at his mannerisms and quirks alone; unironically, being silent helps him reach that quote on quote idealised version of Riddler that I was talking about earlier.

Number 8: The Snatcher (A Hat In Time)

There are many things that can carry on a villain in a story, their evolution, stage presence, complexity, thematic contrast to their counterpart, and so on and so forth. While an antagonist can check off many of these boxes simultaneously (like the one pictured), there's one box that is almost impossible to truly nail perfectly: comedy.

You see, comedy is subjective, and when your main antagonist is also the funniest part of a given story, it becomes hard to also match a sense of gravity and menace that allows them to also be an imposing threat, even harder is to give said antagonist depth and a tragic backstory.

But somehow, out of nowhere, The Snatcher from A Hat In Time manages to simultaneously be the funniest character in his section of the game, carrie said energy throughout the whole experience even down to the DLC, simultaneously strikes the balance between being scary, wholesome, sympathetic and tragic, exude an insane amount of charisma, all while having a deeply disturbing backstory that touches on some heavy themes and re contextualises his actions into something more complicated and out of a broken man, everything I just said + he's the biggest bastard in his videogame and never repents nor does he have his actions called out.

Snatcher really has all the right cards that make a stationary character work and uses them to his maximum potential, and it works because his character arc throughout the game is more about becoming affectionate to Hat Kid than it is about redeeming himself.

Lastly, his voice actor, Luke Sizemore, aka Yungtown, really sells the performance of this devious soul eating worm and burns his catchphrases into your brain for the rest of eternity, much like his boss theme,

Your Contract Has Expired

A song that switches around being scary, epic, energetic and desperate in a short, yet perfectly paced amount of time. You need to listen to it regardless of if you've played the game or not.

Fool.

Number 7: Judge Claude Frollo (Hunchback of Notre Dame)

You can never say no to a classic.

There's nothing that I could say that hasn't already been said by thousands of videos on YouTube, but I'll try anyway: you see, Frollo is the reason why we need a new term to identify certain villains that aren't "sympathetic" but still make you feel some sort of human emotion and a form of "I wish someone could give you the care you need to fix your life", I guess the term empathetic exists, but when do you really see it used?

Now, don't get me wrong, Frollo is absolutely not sympathetic in the slightest, he wants to r##e a Romani woman that's way younger than him, but you can still feel that he's very troubled about it in the Hellfire scene and has definitely a lot of unidentified issues and internalised bigotry that could be worked through, even if it's too late to work through them right now.

In general, I feel like people forget that the main reason why past Disney villains worked had to do more with their human traits juxtaposed to their malice rather than just their plain wickedness, otherwise the Horned King from the Black Cauldron would be top of the Disney villains league and that couldn't be further from the truth.

We should really strive towards writing more villains like Frollo, less omnipotent beings that end up falling flat because they don't have much thematic relevance aside from being a threat (Bill Chyper works because he represents Ego and he's used sparingly) and more average vicious individuals who use their power and influence to get what they want.

All in all, if you've seen The Hunchback of Notre Dame, then you know why this guy is here, but just to cite a couple of repeated points, the Hellfire scene is perfect. It's immaculate. It's unreproducible; there will never be another scene like this coming out of the House of Mouse or animation ever again, the excessive amount of stars and elements that came together to create this gothic classic is so vast that it's literally a miracle.

Frollo is truly the personification of the dark, twisted side of humanity peaking through the door and into your mind, from which he shall never escape as his performance still remains perfect to this very day.

Number 6: The Spot (Spider-man across the Spiderverse)

"You've hit me with a bagel!" It's still the greatest villain origin story of all time. There's truly something maniacal about this reveal, like the entire universe was shattered and reality was shocked at the mere realization that while Miles was having his coming of age moment back in the first film, this guy was having his normal life completely and utterly shattered by a combination of both our heroes stepping up to do the right thing and our doofus lack of foresight and self reflection; all of this stuff is hilarious and completely made up for the film but good god they did such an amazing job tying all the elements together in an unexpected way that makes sense and parallels the journey that our protagonist faced in the first movie.

Like with Rob from The Amazing World of Gumball, and a little bit like number 2 on this list, I just really enjoy the concept of turning background characters who had no relevance whatsoever into the big bad of the story who's been there all along and the heroes (and the audience) just couldn't notice.

With The Spot in particular, there's that sense of satisfaction of turning the wasted potential of a villain who has been underestimated for literal decades and treated as a "villain of the week" (God do I love the meta narrative of this movie) into an actual competent, well written antagonist that is aware of his reputation and strives towards bettering himself and his powers.

He's also the funniest character of his movie too and the voice acting of Jason Schwartzman only accentuates his mannerisms and pettyness.

He also has the coolest usage of portals I have ever seen and his whole "There's a hole inside all of us" metaphor is simultaneously hilarious and very deep personal information that can only be understood if you put yourself into his shoes.

I can't wait for Beyond the Spiderverse to come out and see how his arc resolves, more importantly, I wonder if he's going to rank higher in the future.

Number 5: Lord Shen (Kung Fu Panda)

"Happiness must be taken. And I'll take mine"

.....

What a character.

What a movie.

You cause so much pain and suffering, because you don't understand the people around you, and then those people banish you, and you can't understand why, so you start to believe that they hated you.

They never loved you, so you keep causing pain and suffering but it's not that easy anymore; the guilt starts to resurface, all those bodies keep piling up, but you can't stop because then it would have all been for nothing; so you keep chasing those dreams of grandeur because that's all you have left; the emptiness in your heart can no longer be filled by love, so you try to fill it with something else.

You try to fill it with power. You try to fill it with glory. You try to take everything else for yourself so that you can fill that cup, but it doesn't work, because that cup has no bottom.

And so you're left... with yourself.

And the damage you've done. But now it's different; you've failed. You are left with nothing. Nothing.

And so you outrage, for the last time... And then it all ends. Forever. And you've finally come to accept this, after all....... Who could ever love you?

Number 4: Spamton G Spamton (Deltarune)

You know, in retrospect, it's kind of insane what Toby Fox managed to achieve when creating Spamton.

Not only because Spamton feels like the most insane combination of ideas ever conceived, but also because Toby Fox created such a complex character with such a complicated language and personality and then not only shafted it all aside for the players to go out of their way to interact, but also made all of this in what are officially 2 or 3 cutscenes at most (4 if you consider his shop encounter as one) and only one of them being truly mandatory.

You spend so little time with Spamton, and most of that time is spent fighting him, and yet by the end of it you've become enlightened by the knowledge of him, that after a while... you forget how scary it all was.

All the memes comparing Spamton with Turbo are 100% correct and justified, Spamton truly is Turbo but better; you go through an insane rollercoaster of emotions with this character that you are left absolutely dumbfounded when it all comes to a stop and you go back to play the rest of chapter 2 normally.

His insane mannerisms and mood swings are pretty funny at first, but once you peel back the layers a bit they reveal a pretty realistic and sad portrayal of mental illness, mania and hysteria coupled with an unhealthy amount of social distancing, loneliness, and abandonment issues, that reinforce into your brain the idea of someone lacking proper healthcare and needing to be locked away from society for their (society) own good, simulating the vicious cycle that Spamton lives by: nobody wants to help him but he's still expected to act like a regular individual despite the amount of hardships he's facing and the lack of a support system keeping him from falling back into his bad habits.

I'll admit, I've considered putting Spamton in place of the Number 3 spot on this list; but then I've realised that on an objective level, the next entry totally deserves to be ranked above Spamton; plus, with at least 5 more chapters of Deltarune on our way, whose to say that one of the next gremlins won't be able to dethrone even the number 1 spot?

Drumroll for our top 3:

Nox, the Watchmaker (Wakfu)

There will never be another experience in my life as cathartic as watching the first season of Wakfu for the first time ever again.

On a later rewatch, the initial problems that you've noticed throughout the first half of the season and a little bit in the second half become too apparent to ignore, but the first time everything that goes from the ball tournament to the finale is one of the best paced arcs of television, and everything that happens when the team reaches the Sadida kingdom is just peak Wakfu.

And the king, the culprit, the crown jewel of properly paced stories and arcs is no other than the sad clockwork dilf himself: Noximilliem Coxen the Watchmaker.

Arguably, the greatest sympathetic villain of all time. There has never been another case of a character who has committed such vile, unspeakable crimes, and yet still managed to make me root for them while simultaneously not putting down the heroes.

And let's not be mistaken here, Nox is pretty evil:

Aside from the generic murder, Nox also defiled and stitched together the corpses of multiple victims and turned them into his obedient puppets in order to commit even more murder and genocide in order to achieve his goals.

Also, this is one of the funniest crimes Nox has committed: he abused his dog. It's really not that hilarious nor is it that important in the context of the show, but if you look back at it from an outside perspective then it's really like: Oh yeah. That happened too. Lol.

One of the best parts of his entire arc is his defeat. The "20 minutes" scene deserves a "One Villainous Scene" coverage video to forever immortalise it amongst the greatest. Everything from the music, the subversiveness, the cinematography, the voice acting and just the general art direction of it is worthy of an Eminem award at the Oscars, there's genuinely nothing wrong with this scene, it's truly immaculate.

Words alone cannot do justice to the treacherous, gut wrenching emotional rollercoaster that is experiencing his story for the first time. An hour long video essay would only serve to cover the basics and fundamentals, while for the real deal you need to watch the first season of Wakfu for yourself.

Number 2:

Bradford Buzzard (DuckTales 2017)

And now it's the perfect time to pull out my final wild card, the hole of the sink of my autism, the masterpiece of wasted potential that is Bradford Buzzard from the DuckTales remake of 2017.

When you'll also see the number 2 spot on my villainesses list, you'll come to realise that this spot is more of the "I really wish I could put this at number one but I can't because objectively he doesn't deserve it and the majority of things I love about him in canon were probably an afterthought and in fanon were never plausible to begin with."

And that's how I feel about Bradford Buzzard, an antagonist I spent more time thinking about than probably anybody else on the Earth.

The show runners were so genius for this: we are going to create an original character that will probably struggle to maintain a foot print on the franchise due to the way the Duck verse works, we'll give him an insanely cool backstory and motivation, all coupled with interesting character traits and ideology, we'll make him the ultimate foil to Scrooge McDuck that has been working with him for literal decades, we'll make him the one who has got the closest to isolating Scrooge and destroying his family, and THEN we'll turn him into a generic anime villain that shoots lasers and fumbles his own plan and loses because of insane plot armour and contrivance. Good job writers.

Anyway, I should probably make the case for why this guy ranks so highly in my mind to the point of almost taking the podium for my most liked villain of all time, especially when compared to the stiff competition that we just went through.

Now, part of it is just because this is a personal top 10 and so I can put whoever I want in whatever order I want. But also, with Bradford in particular, there's a personal aspect of relatability, various interests, and passions all coming together to make him stand out in my brain.

The thing is, I've had a pretty strong connection to Disney's Duck's comic books my entire life, even if my love for them came dwindling over time, so when I finally started watching the Reboot and it was amazing, all of that buried passion and love finally re emerged back to the surface, turning me into an annoying super fan. But while season 1 and 2 were great, season 3 actually gave me something to latch on for the rest of time even after the show had ended: the character of Bradford Buzzard.

You see, DuckTales, both in the shows and comics, always had a plethora of villains; from the crazy, megalomaniacal millionaires, to witches, demons, and other mythological creatures, to power hungry aliens, to straight up super-villains. But while all of that is true, there has never been another villain, aside from Magica, Glomgold and Rockerduck at traits, that was built specifically as the anti Scrooge McDuck, and even further, there has never been another antagonist who challenged the very core ideas and concepts of the entire franchise.

Bradford is like the Frank Grimes of DuckTales: just a regular, average, real world guy who's fed up with the nonsensical constant state at which their fictional universe operates and seeks to correct it in the most logical way possible. And while Frank was ultimately a victim of a world in which he couldn't conform, Bradford's outrageous and extreme plans and methods put him on everybody's hit list until he was left all alone, but not before indirectly causing every major disaster throughout the reboot's runtime.

A cold, calculating, machiavellian mastermind whose impact and presence secretly permeates the show, right till the very end.

Shame he wasn't written better.

And now, for the one and only,

Number 1:

Qilby (Wakfu)

Qilby is the biggest example of an anomaly that you could ever observe in a work of fiction. The first time experiencing a story is the most important and impactful moment of that story, as every future rewatch won't be as good as the first. In particular, this is an important aspect of twist villains, as they can only surprise you the first time, since at future rewatches the twist becomes predictable.

Furthermore, if the twist ends up ruining the character that was established up to this point, or it doesn't make any sense, then the story is kind of ruined and it only gets worse on future rewatches, since now you know that everything that you are seeing right now is ultimately worthless and doesn't provide any value.

So why do we love twist villains and keep churning them out? Well, you see, it's a matter of execution. A bad guy introduced in an unconventional manner is much more memorable than one introduced in a straightforward way; the twist can also serve to showcase different aspects of the character before becoming an obvious obstacle, be it quirks, interests, personality in casual settings, or cunning.

Let's not beat around the bush.

If Nox is the single greatest sympathetic villain of all time, then Qilby is by far the greatest twist villain of all time, and the crazy thing is, that he surprises you two times in a row, at first by revealing himself as more evil than you could ever imagine, and then, by outing himself as more complex than you could have ever anticipated.

Let me paint you the picture: you just finished the first season of Wakfu, and you are still pretty fresh of the hype surrounding Nox, so you think to yourself "Oh, now every future antagonist is ruined because nothing could ever top the emotional gut punch that I just went through. Whatever, I'm going to stick around just to see if the story gets worse" and you start the second season.

So far, everything is normal, even better of the first season in terms of engagement value, but you can't help but feel the lack of a Nox like figure inside of the story, but at this point, you just accept it.

Then the final six episodes roll around and OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING, HAS THE WHOLE SHOW JUST GONE INSANE?

Somehow, in some mystical, french, magical way, the season 2 finale is arguably even better than the ending of season 1 despite the fight having less buildup and introducing a lot of brand new characters and an entirely irrelevant faction into his conflict.

The entirety of the scene in Emrumb is some of the best writing I have ever experienced in any work of fiction, and the music accompanying it only accentuates the repressed dopamine being released after various episodes of filler, all of them important for this moment to be as impactful as it is.

Qilby is also just a great, tragic character, that is simultaneously an unforgivable bastard that tried to kill his family and doomed his entire race for a family trip, and a sad, nihilistic man still trying to reconcile his love for his family and his need for knowledge and discovery; his curse never truly allows him to move on or relate to others but his ego and need for his forgetful brothers attention just pushes him even further into resentment, ending up damaging himself and those around him, until he's finally isolated again by the vary people he harmed and showed his love towards.

He's as good as the evil secret sibling trope can get and I never get tired of watching him on screen. His reveal scene to Adamai still gives me the chills to this very day and demonstrated me just how good the surprise villain concept can get when it's executed correctly.

Just an all around great show.

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queerstake · 7 months

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As a queer drawn to the faith and trying to deal with the messiness of entering into everything, I've been trying hard to read more of the Book of Mormon because I only have a very vague understanding of it's Whole Deal, but executive dysfunction, ADHD, and honestly, a million other excuses are making it very difficult. Are there any good resources for walking through the fundamentals? Childish but I feel like I'm disappointing the Lord if I'm not more on top of this.

Hi anon! I totally get it and yes, I can think of a few ideas!

If you're looking for ways to understand the BoM (or even just general doctrine) from more of a bird's eye view:

I hope you don't find this silly, but when I was a kid, the church published an illustrated children's version of the BoM that's obviously way quicker to flip through. It might be harder for you to find those exact editions I read as a kid if you don't have ready access to a church library, BUT I found this!! It's (almost) the ENTIRE BoM illustrated and summarized and it's online!

Looks like they put out videos too that summarize the BoM beginning to end. Here's a link to the video series. I haven't seen these, so I can't vouch for them, but they might be helpful! Similarly, there's a BoM in 60 seconds video you might find helpful.

If you'd benefit from a schedule, the church is currently studying the BoM in sunday school! The past few years, we've been using a study guide called Come Follow Me with weekly assigned reading chapters. I've actually been working on posts about CFM as they relate to queer mormon theology, but I haven't had much posted yet since I've been having a rocky start to 2024. As things improve, I'll be able to hopefully even establish a schedule on this blog!

I'm not sure if missionary lessons is something you're interested in at this point, and it's definitely not something you ever need to do, but the missionary lessons themselves are a pretty good doctrine intro if you're looking for just Mormonism 101 in a digestible way. The missionaries teach out a book called Preach My Gospel, which is available right here. You'll be interested in the lessons, which are found in Chapter 3. If you just scroll down, you'll see some of the links are labeled Lesson instead of Chapter--just click on those bad boys. And if you have any doctrinal questions, I'm always MORE than happy to talk about the church! You'll probably get a faster answer DMing me personally at @logans-mormon-blog, but I'll always answer asks here as soon as time permits.

If you're looking for easier ways to finish the BoM from beginning to end:

The BoM on tape. The church has an audiobook version available on the Gospel Library app and other audio apps like Spotify.

The Reader's Edition. If you can get your hand on a reader's edition, a lot of people find this is an easier way to plow through the BoM. What's special about this one is that it's formatted not like scripture but like prose, and it really does change the reading experience!

I don't know if this helps any, but I struggle with some of the same issues as you and I'm always bitterly disappointed when I'm not able to move mountains. If I had my way, I'd be the most well-read scriptorian of all time and this blog would be updated constantly. But life often doesn't shake out that way. I spend way more time than I want to with my brain entirely burned out of my head. So you're not alone, if that's any comfort. I think God gets it--he made our brains, after all, and knows how hard it is to wrestle with. It's easier said than done, but don't beat yourself up. God loves the both of us and he's the most perfectly patient person who's ever lived. He's not frustrated or disappointed with our efforts. Religion exists, in my opinion, to help improve and enrich our lives, not make them more challenging OR even to make them perfect if we only could just run fast enough. I too wish I could be more diligent and on it, but shit happens, right? And we're not on earth to be perfect, we're here to be happy and to learn. When Joseph Smith was translating the BoM, God told him "Do not run faster or labor more than you have strength and means provided to enable you to translate; but be diligent unto the end." D&C 10:4. We're doing our damndest, and that's all God even wants from us.

If anyone else has more resource ideas, please let us know!

-Logan

#queerstake #tumblrstake #lds #mormon

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cyberrose2001 · 1 year

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Omg, omg, I just found your blog and you write tf +f! Reader fics!!! Ahhhhh. I was wondering if I could request a 21+ fic where reader disobeys prime when he told her to stay. Their feelings are unknown to each other. when she left, though, it caused issues something that prime did not like.

I also write tf +f!reader but mine are more dedicated to Prime than anything.

TFP Optimus x human!fem!reader

oh lawd i think i got carried away with this *stares at 6 page word document*.... wanted this to be also hot and fluffy asf, with a sprinkle of angst for flavour. I hope this is satisfactory! 💕

Synopsis: Optimus Prime refuses to let you join him on missions, but eventually reveals why. He makes it for it, however, starting with you on top of him.

Warnings: Smut, ?soft dom optimus, first time sex, slight angst.

Word Count: 3189

It was mid afternoon when the com link went off. The bots were lounging around, either playing games with their human charges, playing lob ball or tinkering with equipment. Optimus Prime had been doing some research on the base computer and furrowed his optic ridges when he answers the com link to a very loud Agent Fowler, as usual.

“Prime! You better not be busy; I’ve got intel on some cons who have hijacked a nearby military base.” Fowler yells, “You better get onto it, I’ll meet you at these coordinates.”

“Understood, Agent Fowler.” Optimus nods his helm, then turns to the rest of the team who had gathered around him in the meantime, “Decepticons have invaded a military base 30 kliks from here, we must investigate and determine why.”

The bots spring into action, transforming into their alt modes while Ratchet opens a ground bridge to the coordinates Agent Fowler provided. Bulkhead, Bumblebee and Arcee race through the bridge. You removed yourself from the couch and ran up to Optimus just before he was about to transform.

“Hey! Can I come this time?” You begged. The last time you asked him to accompany him on a mission he declined but promised you that he would take you on the next mission. Your hopes were crushed, however, when he gave you a solemn look.

“(Y/n), I am afraid that this mission is far too dangerous for you. You are to remain here with the other humans. Next time I- “

You roll your eyes and stomp your foot onto the ground, taking Optimus by surprise, “You said that last time, Optimus! How come Jack, Miko and Raf get to go on cool missions all the time while I’m stuck here with… Ratchet!”

“I do not wish to put you in danger, you must understand this.” Optimus says, lowering his towering frame down to your level, “And you misunderstand, the others are not coming as well.”

“I know, but what about when you entrusted Jack with the Key to Vector Sigma and let him go to Cybertron of all places?” You questioned, knuckles turning white from your grip on the guard rail, “That’s pretty endangering to a human if you ask me!”

Optimus’s optics narrowed onto yours, standing up tall again, “We will talk on my return, you will stay here. Understand?”

You groan and push yourself away from the rail as you watch your guardian transform and drive through the ground bridge. You turn around, only to be met with wide eyes from Jack, Miko and Raf.

“What? You guys gonna boss me around too?” You huff, turning your heels around to head down the catwalk, your footsteps echoing across the now empty base. Jack shakes his head and attempts to go after you.

“(Y/n), come on, where are you going?” Jack calls out to you.

“Away from here,” You answer, not bothering to turn around. You didn’t want the kids to see the small tears that threatened to spill, “Maybe Optimus will appreciate me more when I’m gone.”

The kids watch helplessly as you exit the base, exchanging worried glances to each other.

Optimus was no liar. He had no intentions of making you feel useless or underappreciated, but he had a duty of care, to protect you and keep you from harms way. While he did promise you that he would take you along with him on his next mission, he could not bare the thought of the Decepticons hurting you, so he put it off every time you would ask him. He often wondered why he was fine with the other humans going on missions with their guardians, but when it came to you, he had a different opinion.

It took him a while to realise that his feelings were something more than that of a guardian relationship. He had developed a love for this human that transcended the boundaries of human and Cybertronian relations, and it troubled him.

But he must not get distracted, not in front of his team. He swung his sword and slashed a Vehicon into two, watching it drop to the ground. He disengaged his sword, and it transformed back into his normal servo and then approached the other members of team prime, who just finished offlining the last of the cons.

“Where’s the fire, Optimus?” Arcee asked. She had witnessed Optimus almost get taken down by the Vehicon’s multiple times, and the look on his face told her that his processor was not in this fight, “You struggled a bit back there.”

“Yeah, you haven’t been yourself lately.” Bulkhead also questioned his behaviour, Bumblebee beeps in agreement.

Optimus turns his helm away from them and closes his optics, “I appreciate your concerns, but I am fine.”

Arcee, Bulkhead and Bumblebee turn to look at each other. They weren’t entirely convinced at his deflecting of their questions, but all silently agreed to not meddle in his personal affairs. Optimus coms Ratchet for a ground bridge back to base, deciding that he needs to tell you what’s been lingering on his processor, for the sake of the team.

Optimus, Arcee, Bulkhead and Bumblebee walk into the base, the ground bridge dissipating from behind them. Optimus scans the base for your presence, but only finds the kids sitting on the couch in silence watching a tv show. He walks over to them.

“Have you seen (Y/n)?” Optimus questions. The kids turn to look at him, Jack is the one to speak up.

“She left, Optimus. I’m not sure where,” Jack gives Optimus a shrug, “She never told us, all we know is that she’s not in the base anymore.”

Optimus optics harden upon the discovery that you had disobeyed his orders to stay at the base, especially when there has been recent Decepticon activity close by. He thought that he would just have a nice conversation about why he cares so much about you, why he wouldn’t let you accompany him on missions. But now, he is going to have a stern talk to you. He thanks Jack and turns back around to head out of the base, ignoring the glances from the other team members. He knows you like the back of his servo; he knows exactly where to look for you.

Out on a cliff in the desert, about an hour walk from the base, sat you. You were absentmindedly picking up small rocks from your side and throwing them down, watching them bounce and crack of the face of the cliff. You often came here when you were deep in your thoughts, usually with Optimus. It provided a beautiful landscape of the Nevada desert and a perfectly secluded spot with no cell phone signal or contact with any other people. But it felt like nothing without him.

It angered you, it really did, how Optimus treats you like a piece of fine china. You were very capable of handling yourself, but it seems like he doesn’t realise that. It was unfair how often you would see the other bots take their human charges out on missions and having fun, it made you jealous, and sometimes you secretly wished you had a different guardian. But the more you lingered on that thought, the more you hated it, not having Optimus as a guardian.

It was no secret to yourself that you had developed feelings for him. He was strong, brave and the gentlest mech you had ever met all in one giant package. He made your heart flutter; he made you feel like a teenager again. But you wished that he would spend more time with you and let himself go and have more fun, maybe that’s why you were so desperate for him to take you on missions. You just miss him all the time.

You sigh, pulling your knees up to your chest after you threw the last rock you could reach down the cliff. You rest your head on your knees as you start to witness the early stages of the sun setting. Beautiful, you thought.

Ears twitching, you pick up the sound of pedes walking behind you, and you freeze, knowing that Optimus was not going to be impressed with you leaving the base. You heard the mechanical sound of him kneeling behind you and you wait for him to make the first move.

“You should not be out here without me,” Optimus says sternly, “Did I not tell you to remain in the base?”

“Yes, you did.” You answer, still staring out to the horizon, “I heard you loud and clear.”

Optimus is slightly taken aback by your bluntness, but continues, “Yet you disobey me, (Y/n).”

“OK, so what am I supposed to do, Optimus? Wait around for you to come back from missions only to wait for you to leave again?!” You stand up and face him, a small tear finally escaping you and rolls down your dusty cheek, “Is that it? Do you even care about how I feel?”

Optimus’s optics soften as he sees your tears. It was not his intention to make you feel this way, and now that he is witnessing your true emotions right in front of him, it’s making his spark break. But he stays silent.

You stand there, hands balled into fists, “Are gonna answer me? Do you even care abou- “

You are cut off short as the Prime leans down to plant a kiss on your lips, your eyes are blown wide open. He pulls away, reaching a servo down to brush your tears away with a cold digit. To say you were shocked was an understatement. He just kissed you, you thought he hated you for running off, but now you were just confused.

“It may be true that I have become… overprotective of you.” Optimus says, gritting his dentas, “But it is purely because I would never forgive myself if I let you get hurt.”

You stare up at him, eyes searching his optics for the meaning behind his words.

“I protect you because…” Optimus pauses, hesitating for a moment, softly rubbing your cheek, “I love you.”

You felt like your heart was going to jump out of your chest. You had no idea that Optimus Prime was overly protective with you because he loved you, it made so much more sense now.

Optimus looks at your blank face, now worried that he has taken it too far, “I apologise if my confession comes off as abrupt. And I apologise if you do not return my affections.”

“No! No, Optimus. It’s ok.” You place your hands on his face plates to ease his worries, “I love you too.”

He smiles at your own confession and at the warmth of your palms, leaning into them and closing his optics, “I have a lot to apologise for, (Y/n). But allow me to… make it up to you. If you are content with me doing so.”

The way that your heat pooled at your lower stomach was embarrassingly quick, but you nod, pulling him into another deep kiss. Optimus smiled into it, opening his dermas slightly so he can start to explore your mouth. It felt very strange, kissing a twenty-foot tall Cybertronian. But the taste of his glossa rolling around your own tongue was intoxicating. Optimus had moved from his kneeling position to sit flat against a rock behind him, picking you up to hold you in his servos and not once removing himself from the kiss. Eventually, you needed air, and you pull away from the heated kiss, softly panting. Optimus smiles at your dishevelled state, gently kissing your cheek.

“You are so heavenly,” He plants small kisses down from your cheek to your neck, licking and tasting, relishing the soft moans that began to come from you. He plants a single kiss to the centre of your chest, “Waited so long for this…”

You breathe out a sigh as he brings a digit up to lift your shirt from the bottom hem, a silent request to remove it. You obliged and pulled it off, throwing it down to the ground. He can feel his spark humming louder when you also took the initiative to remove your pants and underwear. A jolt goes straight to his spike, now throbbing painfully against his interfacing panel. He proceeds with his worshipping, however, kissing both tops of your breasts threatening to spill out of the bra. Your soft moans sound wonderful to his audial receptors.

He works his kisses down your stomach, he feels the small goosebumps against his dermas and the way your hair stands on ends as he does so. Humans are so interesting and complex, he thinks. He stops just below your belly button, looking up at you one last time to gain permission. You nod, hardly containing your eagerness.

He allows you to lay down flat on his palm, his servo feeling cold against your back. You shyly open your legs for him so he can witness your arousal, blushing profusely. He hums in approval, soaking in the sight of you, raw and untamed in front of him. Only for his optics to bare. He brings your body closer to his dermas and places a gentle yet firm kiss to your folds, then experimentally sticks his glossa out and licks right up your centre. He notices your moans as he does so, cataloguing which areas bring out more of your delicious sounds in his processor. Optimus circles the tip of his glossa around your clit, which he realised straight away that this is the most sensitive part of you. He continues this for a few moments, drawing out sweet moans from you.

“Optimus… ughn…fuck,” You whimper out his name, oh how he desperately wants you to finish on his glossa, adoring the way you call out his name. But he can’t let you finish yet. He licks another stripe up your pussy, then dips his glossa into your warmth, teasing your insides.

Optimus’s thoughts are occupied with how you taste, so sweet and soft, more delicate and a stronger taste than that of a Cybertronian valve. His newfound taste for you has his spark yearning for more.

You feel the same way, his glossa is so much larger and warmer than a regular tongue and feels like tiny sparks of static on your skin. The sensations are bringing you closer to your orgasm than you thought, and you gently push him away with a foot in order to prevent it from happening too early. Optimus obliges and draws his intake away from your now soaking wet pussy. The sight of your juices covering his dermas is something that you only thought you could dream of, you take a mental screenshot for later purposes.

Optimus is not sure how much longer he can hold himself back, his spike is aching to be released. He needs to frag you; he needs to feel those velvety walls squeeze around him instead of his glossa. He brings you closer and gives you another kiss, nipping at your lip gently.

He lowers you gently and places you, so you are straddling his hips. You feel something shift behind you and press against your back, your eyes widen as you realise just how big the Prime is. Optimus senses your uneasiness, he can understand why.

“If it would please you, I can mass-displace it so it will be easier, (Y/n).” Optimus offers, servos softly fondling the flesh of your thighs, “I understand if this is too intimidating for you.”

You shake your head and bit your lip, “No, Optimus, I’m not intimidated at all… I want you to feel good too, but if you mass displace it, will it less pleasurable for you?”

Optimus laughs softly, a rare treat for you, “It is actually more sensitive, due to the surface area being reduced, the nerves are more… compact. It is difficult to explain this right now, your wonderful thighs are quite distracting.”

“Go for it then, Prime.” You smile, slowly grinding your ass along his length. Optimus vents hitch as you do so, he then mass-displaces his spike. It is still quite large compared to you, but you were positive you could take it now.

He helps you position yourself over top his throbbing spike, slowly pressing your thighs down as you softly whimper, feeling you stretch wonderfully over his thickness. He emits a low groan as you bottom out, spike twitching inside you. Any previous imaginings of what you would feel like impaled on his spike was snuffed out, the real you exceeded his expectations.

“Holy fuck…” You moan out, hands gripping the metal of his abdomen. Optimus gently rubs a servo up and down your back, letting you adjust to his size. After a moment, you give him a nod and you slowly lift yourself up, only to slam yourself back onto him.

Optimus lets out a guttural moan, he places the servo that was roaming your back onto your hip, guiding you up and down, “Primus… you are… hggn… excellent at this.”

You let out a chuckle in between your moans, “Us humans have had… a lot of practise.”

Optimus’s optics roll to the back of his helm when he felt your hips begin to move in circles, the sensations this little human was giving him was driving him crazy. Your moans and whimpers, the sounds of soft skin slapping against his hard metal are like an anthem to his audio receptors. He grips your hips firm and begins to thrust up into you. He was so close to his release.

“Optimus! Please… make me yours forever.” You moan out as your orgasm hits you, throwing your head back, arms move to rest behind you on his thighs as your hips quiver and shake at his continuing thrusts, “Oh my god…”

“(Y/n) …” Optimus groans your name, pushing one last thrust into you before he overloads. The sight of you completely lost in your pleasure is what made him reach his limit. His spike throbs intensely inside of you, filling you up with his transfluids. His hips shutter as you help him ride out his overload, venting heavily, “Frag…”

You both stayed still for a while, catching up with your breaths. After you collected yourself, you lean down and press a kiss to his abdominal plating, cherishing the soft sigh that leaves Optimus’s intake. He smiles at your affection, brushing a digit across your cheek.

“Was that… a satisfactory apology?” Optimus hums, still venting slightly, optics closed. You smile up at him and nod, pressing a kiss to the tip of his digit.

“Mhmm,” You sigh, “Optimus, I’m sorry that I argued with you… I just… miss you a lot when you’re gone.”

Optimus opens his optics and looks down at you, he brushes a strand of loose hair behind your ear, “I promise that I will never ever make you feel alone again.”

You smiled, leaning into his servo. Why bother going on missions with Optimus, when all you really needed was this.

#transformers #transformers prime #tfp #tfp optimus x reader #tfp optimus x human reader #valveplug

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gvtted-ratz · 3 months

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BEFORE YOU READ:

- Read all tags/ratings if there are any. They are important and give you all you need to decide if you want to actually read. If you do not like the tags/rating, please do not read.

- We ask that anyone who is FEM aligning/identifying to not read our MLM fics. You can still send requests, however, we do not do FEM readers.

- You can find all our works on AO3. Only registered users can view/comment.

- Minors/ageless/blank blogs are not welcome, and you will be blocked. Respect our wishes or you will be blocked. We go through all our likes, followers, and reblogs.

Want to request? Find the rules: here!

Want to see all the fics? Find them: here!

What Are These?

Martin Mathias x M!Reader

Last Edited: January 11, 2021 8:16 PM

TW: past self-harm, self-harm scars

Requested: No.

Word Count: 543

AO3 LINK -> HERE

Dating Martin isn’t that bad, it’s actually pretty relaxing and nice. Martin is a nervous mess who always needs some reassurance. Despite that nervousness, you find him adorable. He’s always called you little bat and every now and then, you call him Count. He always gets flustered when you call him that. When anyone else does, he acts like it’s normal.

You honestly didn’t expect him to see your scars. You always made sure to keep them hidden. They were from your battle a long time ago; a battle you had won but not unscathed. Ever since you’ve been with Martin, you have not only felt better, but you’ve felt like nothing could ever bring you down. You had hoped Martin never found them in fear of thinking different of you. Of course, you knew that he wouldn’t but that irrational fear never went away.

You lay on the bed with Martin. He is curled up in your side with one of your arms wrapped around his shoulders, hugging him closer to you. His head lays on your shirtless chest; your chin rests on his head as he listens to your heartbeat. You both are in your boxers, enjoying the warmth and skin to skin contact. Martin has always enjoyed the skin to skin contact, so every time you both just want to relax or cuddle, you both strip down to your boxers and lay beside one another.

You feel Martin run one of his hands on your stomach, tracing every little mark he comes across. Every now and then, he traces one of the ribs he sees whenever he sees you take in a breath. You lay with Martin for a while, just enjoying your time with him. It takes a while before he is taking your other hand in his and turning it over, exposing your scars that you’ve hidden for so long. “ What Are These? ” He asks in a gentle voice, slowly tracing over them.

“Battle scars,” You tell him in an equally gentle tone. “No matter what I do, they never leave. They remind me of the battle I had a long time ago.”

“Did you win?” He asks, his voice full of hope. You let out a small chuckle and nod.

“Yeah. And now that I have you by my side, I know that I can win it again if I have to.” You shift slightly, getting a bit more comfortable.

“You’re still beautiful to me, Little Bat,” Martin says as he continues to trace them.

“Is that so? Well then, you’re just as beautiful, Count,” You tell him, letting out another laugh. The long irrational fear is gone, replaced with the comfort of knowing he would never leave. Knowing that he would always stay by your side, just like you would stay by his. You wait until Martin’s breathing goes slow and constant before kissing the top of his head. You hold him slightly tighter, grateful for his words. Any fear of him leaving you is gone and replaced with happiness. You let yourself drift off to sleep, happy to know Martin believes that you’re beautiful in his eyes, and possibly brave for winning your fight from long ago. At last, your mind is put at ease.

#x reader #x male reader #fanfic #ao3 fanfic #my fics #gvtted-ratz fics #slasher x reader #slasher x male reader #martin mathias x reader #martin mathias x male reader #mdni blog

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steve-rambo-leaks · 8 months

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ＺＩＮＥ　ＣＯＮＴＥＳＴ　（ｗｉｔｈ　ｐｒｉｚｅ）（≧▽≦）

Ｉ　ｈａｖｅ　ａ　Ｚｉｎｅ　ｃｏｎｔｅｓｔ　ｆｒｏｍ　ＮＯＷ　ｕｎｔｉｌ　Ｆｅｂ　２４ｔｈ　（ａｕｔｉｓｍ　ｈｏｌｉｄａｙ）．　Ｐｌｓ　ｒｅａｄ　ｍｏｒｅ　ａｂｏｕｔ　ｈｏｗ　ｔｏ　ｓｕｂｍｉｔ，　ｔｈｅ　ｐｒｉｚｅｓ　ａｎｄ　ｗｈｙ　Ｉ＇ｍ　ｓｏ　ｈｙｐｅｄ．　

This is for BOTH people who consider themselves artists and those who don't. It doesn't have to be a comic. A ZINE CAN BE ANYTHING :D It can be a tech tutorial, it can be a comic, it can be flash fiction, it can be a local history guide, it can be Street Fighter II Turbo strategies printed out to be left in arcades, it can be anything!

The video below explains the process better than I could probably in text (I suck at conveying thing through text). My video also has a tl;dr that I would appreciate everyone read before submitting.

There's some other stuff below, but if you're more visual, like not the reading type (like me) then feel free to skip and just head to the video description to jump in.

Also, you may know me for my "Raspberry Pis are for paypigs" video where I try to advocate for the upcycling for ewasted Chromebooks.

I've been into the idea of leaving around Zines for a while. Every time I walk into a coffee shop or local business, I think "wow, I really would wish there was something cool to read." So I started making things to put there: 8 small 2.5 inch panels, folded into one 2.5 inch square for those interested to unravel. I put them inside of these origami boxes that a learned how to make, ones with a logo printed on them.

So far I've made: a zine template (I call it a dog ear zine for some reason), a template for the box to put them in, a zine about using yt-dlp, a zine about a reindeer working IT (along with a collaborator) and (coming soon) a zine about a monster in a cave doing stuff. All of the odg LibreOffice Draw template files to make your own zines or print out mine are on my archive.org page (linked at top of my Tumblr). I'd really like other people to try this 8 panel 2.5 inch zine format, and I'm willing to bribe people with sweet, sweet Gabe Newell bucks to do it. You can submit as many zines in this format as you want. Just make sure they're printed out and have pictures of both the front and back (plus other pictures if you want) . In the video I mentioned you can use my submit page, which is probably the easiest for me to keep track of. You can also use the #dogearzine hashtag to enter. Please read the video description before entering, though (which includes Youtube's and Tumblr's terms of service, though this is more of a youtube thing).

youtube

Also, and this is completely unrelated, there's a lot more to me than just the faux-clickbait Wojak thumbnails. I like doing tech, wrestling, japanese, vidya and other videos, but I love to throw art in whenever I can shoehorn it in. Like, the video where I go over inchworm, butterfly, colors 3D and flipnote sudomemo - colors 3D on a hacked 3DS was my sister's first experience with digital at (she's moved up to an iPad and Procreate). So, it hold a special place in might heart, as a lot of the things I talk about do. I made a Whomp video because I miss Ronnie. I made a Rockbox video because I wished more people used dedicated MP3 players and knew where and how to download music. I want to help people do interesting things. And I also want to thank anyone who read all of this. You are cool. I hope everyone who's able to can compete in this contest and challenge themselves to get out of their comfort zone, to try something new! Also, also, thanks for liking these posts, people on Tumblr. You all have cool blogs. (^o^)丿

#zine #contest #zine contest #youtube #zine template #archive.org #comic #challenge #fun #chromebook #raspberry pi #wojak #zine ideas #fun ideas #steam #Youtube

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agirlunfilteredsblog · 9 months

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HOW TO PREP FOR COLLEGE/UNI ADMISSIONS 📚🎓📖

Hi girls!! Seems that many of you liked my tips and tricks for studying, so I figured I’d give you my advice on how to prep for college/university admissions. I’ll also link down below my post on tips for studying if you guys haven’t seen it yet!!

1. LEARNING YOUR PRIORITES

As much as we hate to admit it, colleges are looking for students that can perform well in an academic environment. For you to successfully demonstrate that, you need to have the grades. That means learning to prioritize school, no matter how much that sucks. I’m not saying that school should consume you either, all I’m saying is school should be one of your biggest priorities. If you’re trying to get into a competitive school, grades mean everything, so the higher the grade, the better the chances.

2. ENGAGING IN SOCIAL ACTIVITIES AT SCHOOL

I know that it’s hard sometimes to put yourself out there and join different clubs, but trust me, it helps tremendously with admissions. Showing that you can take initiative, proves that you’re a hardworking student. Although debate teams and student bodies are the most known school activities to join, there are so many others that don’t require so much public speaking. You could be part of a student journal team or found your own little club on something you hold dear to you. These little things may seem insignificant, but in the grand scheme of things, they can be worth a lot!

3. HAVING PASSION PROJECTS OUTSIDE OF SCHOOL

This is something highly achievable for anyone. We all have something we love and can capitalize on. Personally, it took me awhile to find the one thing that stuck, but once I did, it no longer felt like a task. Since I am someone especially sociable, I started volunteering at a rehabilitation hospital where the patients just wanted friends to talk to. I started going there regularly and it simply became part of my weekly routine. Once there, I noticed many of the patients were partly or fully deaf, so to be able to communicate with them, I started learning ASL. You see how easy it is to find small passion projects?? Beyond that, you can always start a blog here (like me hehe) on something you’re passionate on or a website!!

There are surely other things you can do, but these are the three things that really helped me during my admissions. I want to remind you all, that you can do all these things and still be rejected from your top school, but that is OKAY. Rejecting is only redirection and trust me, life has a path for you that is amazing. Sending you all the best luck for your admissions <3

all my love,

a girl unfiltered 💋

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genericdragon · 7 months

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Hello! Since my art and designs seem to be getting more attention recently(??????) and stuff like this has come up a few times, I thought I'd lay down some ground rules about my art and characters.

Art Rules:

Generally if you want to use my art anywhere PLEASE ASK ME FIRST!!! I'll most likely say yes I just want to know about it. If you're reposting it on a different platform or sharing it on Discord or whatever I'd also appreciate if you could tell me what other people are saying about it or send me a link to the post. Also free to use as pfps or whatever as long as you ask first. and unless I say otherwise (there are some things I don't want my name attached to yknow) ALWAYS MAKE SURE TO CREDIT ME!!! ("genericdragon on Tumblr" will suffice). If it's art that I made specifically for you you're free to use it anywhere without asking just remember to credit me.

Please don't edit my art in any way, shape, or form, aside from maybe cutting out the background or whatever. (including drawing on top of it, changing colors, etc)

You're allowed to trace/heavily reference my art for practice (don't know why you'd want to tho) but DO NOT POST IT ANYWHERE OR USE IT FOR ANYTHING ELSE PLEASE.

Unless we're very close friends/mutuals do not expect free art from me. You can commission me on artistree or follow me on artfight (<- you are VERY likely to get free art this way.) I might do requests but only if it's something that I'd want to draw even if no one requested it. (no fetish baiting. I know it when I see it.)

Character rules:

If you want to use my exact humanization as your headcanon for that character or use them in your AU then be my guest! Again, just make sure to credit me for the design, and please tag me in anything you do with them :)

That being said, there are a few story related things that I'm not comfortable sharing with other AUs, but it's usually stuff that I don't post on Tumblr so you probably don't know abt it anyway. Just ask me if you're unsure. However I will also ask that you don't create an entirely new backstory for them if you're putting them in your own AU.

I can't stop you from taking inspiration from my designs but please don't just change a few things from my design and call it your own. They're not technically my original characters but I am still very attached to my humanizations and I'm not comfortable with them being modified like that. I'm glad that ppl like my designs but I don't want them to run too far away from me until they're not mine anymore yknow?

You are always always ALWAYS welcome to draw my character designs, especially when interacting with your own or other people's :) Tag me in any art you make of them!! I want to see it!!!

I made another post about it but self-shipping is allowed (as long as it's not a teenager who's way younger than you) just make sure to abide by the rest of these rules.

Also drawing nsfw of my 18+ characters is fine. (Unless I explicitly say they're a teenager or they are known to be a teenager in canon you can assume they're an adult) You can show me or not idc. Just don't send it to me without warning I don't wanna be jumpscared

Other Stuff:

I do not control the hyperfixation. If you followed me for one specific fandom/character that I don't post about often I can't guarantee that you'll see any more of it. Portal is the one thing you can ALWAYS expect me to come back to but the other stuff just comes and goes. Not saying that I'll NEVER come back to it again just don't hold your breath. Feel free to unfollow or block any tags you're not interested in, I don't take any offense to it.

Please do not reblog any art older than like... 3 or 4 years. I'll leave it up for now but if you reblog it I WILL delete it, sorry.

Continuing from that point, this is my blog and I will delete things as I see fit. Please do not download and repost my art if I delete it. If it's gone then I don't want it to be public anymore, please respect my wishes.

I won't throw a hissy fit if you like art but don't reblog it, I totally get that some things just aren't for everyone, but reblogging really does help a lot and I appreciate it :)

Please don't feel intimidated by me! Apparently some people think of me as a Big Scary Popular Artist and I have no idea where that impression came from but I'm not. I'm just a weirdo girl making my silly little drawings. Also PLEASE don't say anything to the effect of "your art is so good it makes me feel bad" or using my art to put yourself down. I have Kind Of Complicated feelings about my art so when people do this it really messes me up. Just don't, it makes both of us feel so much worse.

Asks are always welcome, although I do try to draw art in response to asks but sometimes I just don't get around to it, or it's for a fandom I'm not currently interested in. (Sorry to that one person who sent me an INSIDE related ask that's just been sitting in my inbox for several months)

I do have an nsfw blog, you can dm me for the url, although I may choose to withhold it from you for any reason. (I'm shy 👉👈)

Other than that just uhhhhh be reasonable treat me like a person respect my boundaries etc. I'll update this if needed but this is the most important stuff for now I think

#rambles

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practically-an-x-man · 1 month

Note

Get ASKED

(For this ask game)

For Desert song;

4, 23 and 25

For any fic you'd like;

11, 15 and 20

Thank you so much!!

Normally I put the link to the ask game here but since you linked it up top... here, I'll just give you the Crown of the First Ask 👑

For Desert Song:

4. If the fic required it, what did you research in order to write it?

I didn't actually do a whole lot of research for this one!! A lot of the more complicated subjects were areas I already had knowledge in, like anatomy and forensics, and the rest I just made up on the fly lol.

I think the main research I did was for how to write Quinn's disabilities. Many of her experiences with chronic pain and joint problems are pulled from my own life, but the circumstances that led to that (being very different from my own) took a bit of research. Plus, I haven't experienced hallucinations the way she does, so I looked into blogs and posts from people who have experienced them to try and convey them in a realistic, respectful way.

23. How did you come up with the title?

The title is from the My Chemical Romance song called Desert Song, which is given the tag of (Previously Unreleased) on some deluxe albums. It was a song that wasn't meant to be on the album - written when Gerard Way was suicidal, performed while he was drunk, it's incredibly powerful and incredibly rough.

I knew from the beginning that I wanted this fic to be themed around music, particularly punk, metal, and alt rock songs like the type Quinn would listen to. Desert Song in particular worked for the title for a few reasons:

The main setting is the desert, with the airplane graveyard that the ghosts use as their home base. The fic is the song of the desert.

A lot of the lyrics line up with Quinn's experiences - "did we all fall down?", "I can see you awake any time in my head", "from the Earth to the morgue", etc.

The circumstances of the song, like I said above, also echo Quinn's experiences (particularly at the start of the fic, where she's alone and in pain and still grieving her former life)

25. Share your favorite line

Really it's just this last line, but it's only impactful if I share the context too

“Not really.” they admitted, “I mean, I tried. But I guess there’s just a lot about me that tends to… scare people off.” They weren’t going to shy around it. It was the punk-ness. It was the trans-ness. It was the disabled-ness. And maybe it was the fact that it was not just one or two but all three, and that tipped the scales just a little too much. Were there people out there who wouldn’t care? Without a doubt. That was simply statistics. And she wanted to believe the world was good at heart. But she’d just happened to fall on the unlucky side, as she always seemed to. If there were people like that out there, she’d never been lucky enough to stumble across one of them. All she’d managed to run into were… the others. The not-so-greats. The Wait-So-You’ve-Got-A’s and the Can’t-You-Just-Walk’s and the You’d-Be-So-Pretty-If-You-Just’s. It was a lot like the physical therapy, really. After a while, she just gave up on it. Billy was silent for a moment. Finally he squeezed her hand, his fingers warm around her own. “Haven’t scared me off.”

First of all... a lot of this is pulled straight from the heart for me. I am trans, and punk, and disabled, and a lot of Quinn's fears here are the same things that worry me whenever I think about trying to find a partner somewhere out there. It's a really painful passage for me, but also really comforting when we get to Billy's response. A lot of this fic is a reflection of how I wish I could be cared for, and this is one of the more explicit allusions to that.

And even within the fic... I think it shows a lot about their relationship. Up until this point, they've been mostly trying to pretend things are still like they always were - and in some ways they are, but there are also a lot of things that will never be the same, and they can't just ignore that forever.

This line is an admission from Billy in two ways: first, he's admitting that he cares about her on this incredibly deep level, and second, he's acknowledging her disabilities and the way things have changed, while also promising to her that those things aren't going to push him away. It's a really powerful line, especially when he's the type of guy to take so few things seriously most of the time.

____

And honestly I'll just answer these other three for Desert Song too XD

11. What was the most challenging aspect of writing it?

Hm... pacing. I want to keep things moving enough that the action doesn't fade, but I also don't want things to move so fast that we lose Quinn's bonding with the team and her learning to get comfortable with herself. I love writing Quinn and her relationship with Billy so much, it's hard not to get lost in it lol

15. Talk about the characters’ struggles & how you decided on those

I've said it before, but a lot of Quinn's struggles are a reflection of my own. There are differences too, of course: she's transfem and I'm transmasc, her joint problems are much more severe and developed after a single traumatic event while mine are chronic and progressive, and while her learning to cope with her disabilities is very much a reflection of my experiences as a very active kid and teen (I even briefly trained for American Ninja Warrior!) now dealing with progressive health issues, I'm definitely not a pickpocket or parkourist. But she's trans, she's disabled, she's hardcore punk, and so am I, and I use her story almost as a journal to get some of my own feelings out.

As for how I "decided" on those... I was writing Nom De Guerre (my first 6 Underground fic with an entirely different OC) when I came up with the idea of a character who was in the parkour crew with Billy, fell with him, and didn't get lucky the way he did when it came to injuries. That was the first spark of Quinn as a character. The other details sort of fell into place from there.

20. Did you work with a beta? How did that affect the finished fic?

Nope! I have never actually had a beta writer, on any of my fics. No Beta We Die Like Six, or whatever

#my friends!!!#answered asks #ask game #my ocs #oc quinn/aces #my writing #desert song fic

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mischief-lies-and-stories · 1 year

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Loki Season 2 Wishlist

I've been creating a wishlist for what I want to see in Loki season 2, which premieres October 6.... [pause for long-suffering sigh because I’m so tired] I’m very annoyed that it’s not coming out until October (if it’s genuinely because of the strike(s), I’m not annoyed with the writers/actors but with the studios for not meeting demands so we can move on with our lives, but I’m pretty damn sure the strike is a scapegoat). I’m not surprised they keep moving it back, because they also kept pushing back season one! (I wish this format was audio so you could hear my indignation, haha.) But I wish it was still coming out in the summer like it was supposed to. Anyway, let’s jump into it. (Fair warning, a little bit of ranting incoming.)

First things first, Lokius: This ship has grown on me. I was resisting for a very long time, and I think it took until about episode four or five before I was like, “Okay, fine, you can date Owen Wilson.” And then I was all on board, and at this point I’ve written I think three Lokius fics on AO3 (link in the blog description). So, yeah. @ MCU, if you need some ideas, agree to the writers’ and actors’ demands and then hire me. I’m a lot of things but I’m not a scab. Okay, anyway.

Genderfluid Loki: I’m genderfluid myself, and the “representation” included in the show was nonexistent. First of all, fluid is not a sex. Sex is assigned to you at birth, on Earth, and it corresponds to your genitalia. You are usually assigned male or female. There may be some places now where you can get Intersex put onto your birth certificate, if that qualifies, but until very recently, most intersex babies ended up undergoing surgery to change their bodies to fit better with one sex assignment or the other. Therefore, fluid cannot be considered a sex, at least in terms of on Earth. Perhaps it could be on other planets, but the people watching this show (as Twitter has been so helpfully pointing out recently) are on Earth, so no, wrong, Loki’s genderfluidity is gender-based not sex-based. I don’t know why they didn’t just put gender on the file, they should have. And that was the only time they included it, and I think that they put it there (aside from being like “ooh look at us we’re so progressive!”) as foreshadowing that Sylvie was going to be a girl. Which is bullshit, because that’s not what genderfluid means, either! Genderfluid means that you, yourself, change genders. And we never, in the show or the MCU in general, see Loki explicitly present or identify himself as anything other than a man. And furthermore, Sylvie isn’t genderfluid either, because she never states that she’s anything other than a woman. Nor do either of them ever request people refer to them using any other pronouns. On top of that, Sylvie is a trans woman, you cannot convince me otherwise, and you will pry that conviction out of my cold, dead, genderfluid hands. (I’m very incensed about this entire thing, I apologize. This is why I inserted the read more and the warning above.) So I’d like to see more of genderfluid Loki (not Sylvie; she’s made it clear that she is a (trans) woman, and I’m respecting that she’s got one gender). I don’t necessarily need to see him shapeshift into a woman, like into a different actor or Tom Hiddleston in make-up or something, because as much as I would love to shapeshift, I can’t, and I don’t think he needs to shapeshift to be his most authentic, genderfluid self (because then what does that say about irl genderfluid people? rant for another time, though, sorry). So I just want a little more justice to be paid to that, and maybe let him change up his pronouns sometimes. All right, moving on, before I get really worked up.

Verity: I love Loki: Agent of Asgard. Al Ewing is my favorite comic writer for this reason (and not because he’s also bi; I just found that out 24 hours ago). Agent of Asgard is, in my opinion, the best version of Loki ever to hit the comics. It is the best version of genderfluid Loki, the best version of redemption arc Loki, the best version of Loki as a character in general. And his best friend is Verity Willis, ace icon Verity Willis. (I don’t make the rules, she’s ace; have you seen her character design? Have you heard her say that she’s not interested in romance? She’s ace!) I want her, some how, some way, in Loki. This is a little bit more of a stretch, because I don’t know how she can be put in, so this is a little bit more of a pipe-dream of a wish. But I want. her. in. Loki. So bad.

Theo Bell: I also really like Mackenzi Lee’s Loki: Where Mischief Lies. (It’s a great book; you should definitely read it if you haven’t.) In it, Theo is Loki’s love interest-slash-coworkerish-slash-partner in crime. This story is set in Victorian England. Theo Bell is gay and walks with a cane. It’s been awhile since I read it so I may be taking this theory from a fanfic I wrote, but I’m pretty sure it’s canon that he became disabled as a result of a homophobic attack. (So trigger warning for that, but if it’s canon it’s only mentioned) He’s a great character; he’s funny, he’s snarky, he doesn’t put up with any of Loki’s shit, and he can also (and this might also be me adding to the character but I’m pretty sure I’m right) see through Loki’s lies pretty quickly at some points. So I would really like to see Theo in the MCU. I also have some theories about Theo versus Mobius (shameless plug for one of my fics, Choose Me, which utilizes my theory about them), so I would like for Theo to show up in the way that proves my theory right.

Agent of Asgard Loki: At the very least, I just really want that coat, that coat is so cool. (If you don’t know what I’m talking about, google Loki: Agent of Asgard. The coat that he wears throughout the comic is kick-ass.) I want that coat somewhere in the show, I do not care who’s wearing it. That being said, I really want Agent of Asgard Loki to make an appearance in the MCU at some point. Somehow. I already have some theories about where I think we can go with AoA Loki in the MCU (which I’ll probably post about later). Like I said, I really love that version of Loki, I really love that comic arc, and I want him somehow paid tribute to somewhere in the show. Actually, though, I did just reread the entire comic run, and I noticed that towards the end in the final climax of his redemption arc, there’s a lot of similarities between that and the last couple episodes of season one. So they already seem to be drawing on AoA, so maybe they won’t be able to include the actual characterization of Loki from AoA. But it’s still on my list.

Let Loki do more magic, goddammit!: He does very little magic in season one. Although he’s not able to do magic in the TVA (which was very annoying for the fic I was trying to write the other day), but as far as I can tell, he only does magic like four or five times in the rest of the show. Classic Loki literally says (and I looked up the exact quote because I’m a NERD, can you tell?) “Blades are worthless in the face of a Loki’s sorcery.” And then Loki proceeds to do NO MAGIC for most of the show! So I want him to do more magic, especially shapeshifting. And at one point I think he mentions that he likes doing his duplicity thing, so I think he should do more of that, too. (Which I think based on the only trailer-like thing we’ve gotten so far, it seems like he’s going to do. And maybe I’m stealing this from that trailer, but I think it would be really funny if he did the duplicity thing and then Mobius automatically knows which one is the real Loki, which is hilarious, because Thor doesn’t usually know.)

Give my girl Sylvie a girlfriend: While I do like the idea of her with B-15, I feel like the reason why we’re shipping her with B-15 for the most part is because there are basically no other girls in this show. C-20 is dead, Renslayer is a dick, and we just really don’t want her to be with Loki (you saw my first entry on this list, you know where I stand). I’m counting Loki on this list since he’s genderfluid even though it’s not being portrayed very well. So her with B-15 is fine, I do kind of like it, but I don’t know enough about B-15, I don’t know enough about their relationship. I don’t think they even have enough of a relationship yet for me to really feel like I super ship it. But I just want somebody for her, preferably a girlfriend, because I think that’d be cute. I’m genderfluid, personally, but I’m available. ;-)

Thor: I! Want! Thor! I know we got Frog Thor, but I want actual Thor! I want Thor to give all of the Lokis a hug, in particular Kid Loki (and I have some theories about why he killed Thor, or why he said he killed Thor), Classic Loki, Sylvie, and also our regular Loki. Because I think they need a hug from their big brother (I know they were raised as twins, but I like saying he’s their big brother, I don’t care).

Classic Loki in Valhalla: Pretty straight forward (and you can read After on AO3, because I wrote this). I need Classic Loki to see Thor and I need Classic Loki to be in Valhalla, because I think he deserves it. (If he’s actually dead.)

Mobius’s backstory: I want to know where Mobius came from; I want to know how he got to the TVA. I want to know if he had a jet ski or if my theory is correct (per Choose Me).

Why Sylvie was taken by the TVA: There are some great theories about why Sylvie was taken by the TVA, one of which I subscribe to the most as of late (as included in Nothing Matters at the End of the World. I’m pretty sure this is my last plug on this post, I’m so sorry). But I am not convinced that she was taken in because she’s a girl. I think that’s transphobic and misogynistic and nonsense. And I say transphobic because Sylvie’s a transwoman, and I will not be taking criticism on this. I don’t care that that line “born the goddess of mischief” was probably meant to discourage trans headcanons, and I encourage the writers to respectfully get their heads out of their asses and consider that “born this way” is not just a Lady Gaga song (but the song is also relevant in this case). So I think it’s pretty damn transphobic to say that she isn’t allowed to exist because she’s a woman. And it’s misogynist and transmisogynist to claim that the rest of what the timeline demands of her cannot be accomplished if she isn’t a cis man or genderfluid or whatever a “right” Loki is. So I want to know why she was actually taken in. There are a lot of theories online about why she was arrested, and I like a lot of them. And on top of that, she doesn’t know! She told Loki that it’s because she’s a girl, but then when she gets in front of Renslayer, she’s like, “What was my nexus event?” Which implies that she does not actually know. And maybe it’s just bad writing or a plot hole, and that’s very possible. It’s the MCU, and writers make mistakes (I know I sure do, though I don’t have a team of people checking my work). But I’m choosing to go with she doesn’t actually know. She was like six years old, she was a kid, she assumed something. And why would you assume that, if you’re six? Unless you’ve been told something else your whole life. So there are two possibilities for why she assumed this. Either, yes, she’s a cis woman, and spent her entire life until that point being told-- presumably by Odin--that because she’s a girl she’s not gonna rule. Which would suck, but checks out for Odin, because he’s a dick. Or she spent most of her life being told she’s a boy and having to tell everybody that she’s a girl. And even if she isn’t faced with any transphobia on Asgard (as Where Mischief Lies would have us believe), that’s hard for a six year old, and when she’s told that she’s in trouble for doing nothing, she’s gonna make some assumptions, and maybe she landed on that. But I don’t think she actually knows why and I want to know why. And I think she deserves to know why.

Reunite Sylvie with Thor: I either want Sylvie to reunite with her Thor or be sibling-adopted by Loki’s Thor (bonus points if Loki gets jealous and Thor has to be like “Give me a break. I love you, too, idiot.”). I want Sylvie to somehow get her brother back, whether it’s the one she lost or the Thor we know. I think she needs somebody, and I think Thor is a great person for that. Because I think Thor will immediately be like “You’re great. I love you. You’re wonderful, just because you’re my sister, and you’re the best.” Even after just meeting her, because Thor is such a wonderful little golden retriever puppy, and also, he loves Loki so much. And he continues to, even after everything that happened in the MCU! And that’s lovely, and I think Sylvie deserves someone like that.

And finally, I need Loki, somehow, in some way, to be able to lift Mjolnir by the end of season 2: I think he’s moving, very swiftly, towards being worthy of lifting Mjolnir, and I want him to be able to do that. I think that will show him, personally, that he is better and has changed. And I think he needs that physical validation and confirmation that he’s changed. I think that people (Mobius) can tell him until they’re blue in the face that he’s a good person, that he can be good, and that he can do what’s right and be a hero, but until he can lift Mjolnir (the way his brother can, because he’s been told by everyone his whole life that his brother is the best), I don’t think that he’ll believe that he is worthy of anything. And I want Thor and Mobius to see it, and I want them to lose their goddamn minds. Because I certainly will.

#Loki #loki tv show #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #loki season one #loki season 1 spoilers #sylvie laufeydottir #mobius m mobius #lokius #references to loki agent of asgard #loki agent of asgard #verity willis #references to loki where mischief lies #loki where mischief lies #theo bell #did this make any sense at all? i'm scribing it from a recording i did on my phone eight hours ago lol #not all posts on this blog will be this damn long i promise

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