#I’m DEFINITELY not trying to imply anything when I point out that lesbian day is in Libra month

[the-cheese-slut]

happy lezzbin day everyone

enjoy hooking your keys on your pants and being fucking awesome

[mochegato]

Calling Dibs

This day was going to be boring, Jason knew that before he agreed to the trip in the first place.  ‘Agreed’ is a generous term.  ‘Relented’ might be a better term. Regardless, he was in Paris for the next week.  He was looking forward to the Louvre and seeing Notre Dame, but he was expected to spend time with his family for a large part of the trip and end with a branch opening party, because those are always so much fun.

He had barely plopped onto the hotel couch when something went flying past the building, crashing into the building down the street in a cacophony of shattered glass and warped metal.  “Holy shit!” Jason yelled, jumping up and running to the window to assess the situation.  The family looked to each other to see if anyone had a better grasp of the situation. Everyone shared the same confounded expression, before running out on the balcony to check out the situation.  

Bruce sighed.  This was most definitely not part of the plans.  This was supposed to be a relaxing week with the family looking at art for Damian, going up in the Eiffel Tower (and preventing him from jumping off) for Duke, sampling French foods and checking out French fashion for Steph, exploring the catacombs for Tim, attending the ballet for Cass, visiting Notre Dame for Jason, and time together as a family for Dick, with just a side of meetings for him.  Superheroing was not one of the scheduled activities.

Bruce opened his mouth to state a plan, but before the words made it past his lips, blurs of red and black swung past them toward the creature that had destroyed the building.  It took more than a few minutes for him to finally close his mouth in a resolute line as they watched the two heroes fight.  Jason’s mouth stayed open in awe as he watched the red figure expertly dodge and strike the creature.  It stayed open until the creature backhanded the red hero into a wall of the building across the street.  

The group flinched in sympathy at the sight, all too familiar with the feeling of getting smashed into a building.  She fell to the ground in a crouch.  Instead of fear, she looked back up with a glare. She jumped away and landed next to her partner in black and seemed to have a conversation before separating. The black hero distracted the creature while she swung further away.  It almost seemed like she had run away until they saw her charge at the creature from the side, hitting circles that decorated its body, shattering them like mirrors as she went.  With each hit the creature seemed to deflate more, until she hit the last one, a black butterfly emerging from it.  

She captured it in her yoyo and released it almost instantly as a white butterfly.  She called something out and threw her yoyo up into the air.  As soon as she did, a pinkish red wave rushed across the city and suddenly all the damage they had watched with their own eyes, was reset to its previous condition.  

They stared, mouths agape again, trying to take in everything they saw.  Finally the silence was broken by Jason.  “I call dibs!”

“What!” Dick exclaimed.  “You can’t just call dibs on someone.”

“I just did,” Jason scoffed.  “I call dibs on the red badass.  You can have the cat one.  Follow B’s footsteps, protégé.”

“You don’t even know if she’s straight.  What if she’s into girls?” Stephanie objected. “Maybe they both are.”

Jason stared at her for a second before his eyes narrowed.  “Fine. But if she’s anything other than a lesbian or ace, I have dibs.  And the cat one is up for grabs.”

“Oh, I’ll grab,” Steph smirked.

“Fine, whatever,” Dick groused, crossing his arms over his chest and looking away.  “Wasn’t looking for romance this trip anyway.”

“Your libido is not the priority right now. Father, did you bring us here for this?” Damian demanded.

Bruce kept his eyes on the spot where the creature had been a few seconds earlier before turning into a distraught woman. “No, I had no idea.  But now that we know, let’s investigate.  We’ll find out as much as we can from outside sources and try to meet up with the heroes when we can.  If they have a regular patrol, we can try to meet them somewhere. If they don’t, we might have to try to show up discretely at the next attack.”  He observed the people below already returning to their normal jobs. “It doesn’t seem like this is too out of the ordinary for everyone, so I don’t think we’ll have to wait long.”

He wasn’t wrong.  In fact, they only had to wait until the next night for another akuma to strike.  As soon as the akuma was dealt with, they caught up with the Parisian heroes, though in hindsight, they perhaps should have announced their presence a bit more clearly, judging by the way Red Hood was hanging upside down off the side of the building they were on.

“Sorry again,” Ladybug grimaced as she helped pull him back onto the roof.

“No, we shouldn’t have snuck up on you,” Red Hood assured her.  “I was just struck too speechless by you to give you a better warning.”

Ladybug blinked at him a few times before turning to the rest of the group and motioning toward Red Hood helplessly. Chat gave her an amused smile. “She tends to have that effect even on the best of us.”

“As Red Hood said, we should have announced our presence more plainly.  We likely would have reacted the same if you had snuck up on one of us,” Batman said, taking a step forward.

“We just wouldn’t have looked as kick ass doing it,” Red Hood added, leaning toward Ladybug.

Ladybug raised an eyebrow at him, but allowed him to move closer to her.  “Well, you certainly didn’t look ‘kick ass’ falling like that,” she smirked at him.

“I’ll work on how I look when falling, then.  I have a feeling I’m going to be falling a lot for you.”

Ladybug narrowed her eyes at him and puckered her lips in an unsuccessful effort to keep them from quirking up.  Red Hood’s chest puffed up almost imperceptibly at the sight.  Ladybug’s eyes darted over to Batman and back to him.  “First, I don’t think you came all the way to Paris just to hit on me.  I believe we have other things to talk about. Second, if you’re going to hit on someone, take off the helmet.  It’s rude. I can’t read your expressions at all. It puts me at a disadvantage.”

Red Hood quirked his head to the side. “Can’t take the helmet off. Secret identity, you know?  B would kill me.  If he didn’t the squirt there,” he motioned toward Robin, “would try. But trust me, if you saw my face, you’d swoon.  And I assure you, I would have come all the way to Paris if I’d known you were here waiting.”

“But we didn’t know you were here,” Batman cut in harshly.  He placed a hand on Red Hood’s shoulder and pulled him back with the others.  “We were unaware there was a supervillain in Paris. We’d like to offer assistance, ours and the Justice League’s, but first we should introduce ourselves.  I’m Batman.  That’s Spoiler, Black Bat, Signal, Robin, Red Robin, Nightwing,” he motioned to each of them in turn as he said their name.  “And you’ve met Red Hood.”

Ladybug and Chat nodded to each of them as Batman said their names.  “It’s a pleasure to meet you all.  I’m Ladybug. This is my partner Chat Noir.”

“Sorry, we didn’t bring our full team.  We would have if we’d known there was going to be a party,” Chat smiled disarmingly.

“We’ll be sure to let you know next time,” Spoiler grinned back at him.

“Can we sit down with you sometime to discuss the situation?” Red Robin interrupted whatever Chat was about to respond with. “It doesn’t have to be tonight, but we weren’t planning on staying in town too much longer.  Not that we haven’t been enjoying our time here.  And we’ve definitely enjoyed watching you work. You have got some really good moves.”

“Oi,” Jason interrupted, smacking him in the shoulder.  “I called dibs.”

“Dibs?” Ladybug quirked her head to the side and scrunched up her nose in such an adorable way Jason let out an almost inaudible choke.  Quiet enough that only Red Robin, letting out an almost as silent scoff, and Chat Noir, with his enhanced hearing, heard him.  Chat zeroed in on him with a knowing smirk.  He rested his arm on his baton and got into a comfortable position leaning against it, waiting for the entertainment.  “What is ‘dibs’?” Ladybug continued, oblivious to the dynamic between the three.

Chat’s smirk grew.  “Dibs, M’lady, is when you claim first rights to do something.”

Ladybug stared at him for a few seconds as she put together what he was implying.  Her head whipped around to Red Hood.  Her face was furrowed in an offended scowl.  She pointed to herself.  “Am I the thing you’re going to do first?”

Jason jerked back at the suggestion as Chat Noir and the rest of his family, sans Batman and Robin, started laughing.  “No! No, no, no.  No. Not… No.”  He waved his arms desperately.  “Not that.  I…”  He took a breath and glared at his family to get them to shut up, expecting them to know he was glaring harshly under his helmet.  “I just get to be the first to try to impress you.”

Ladybug rolled her eyes.  “You want to impress me?  Do something impressive.  And I don’t date as a superhero, so you’re going to have to impress civilian me. Good luck with that.”

Chat gave Red Hood a patronizing grin.  “You’re going to need it,” he singsonged.  He looked back and forth between Ladybug and Red Hood a few times, his eyes sparkling with mischief.  He swung his baton over his shoulders and rested his arms over it.  “But then again, she is the embodiment of luck so, maybe she just gave it to you.”

Ladybug’s head whipped back to him and she narrowed her eyes at him in warning.  He smiled innocently back at her as if he hadn’t just been meddling in her love life… again.  He needed to meddle in his own instead.  Although, with the way Spoiler kept eying him, maybe it was already taken care of. “Anyway,” she said loudly, bringing the focus back to the topic at hand.  “Tonight isn’t good.  We both have early mornings tomorrow.  But tomorrow night should work.  How about meeting here tomorrow at 22h?”

“Okay, now that that is settled, I have a very important question,” Spoiler spoke up.  Signal groaned next to her, preparing for whatever her question was going to be.  “Where is the best place to get some French treats?” Batman let out a deep sigh. “What!  I came to France to eat amazing French food and shop French fashion. They live here.  They should know the good places to go.”

Chat straightened up immediately and sent Ladybug a feral grin.  “You don’t say…”

“Chat,” Ladybug hissed warningly.

“They’re just asking for advice,” he answered in his most exaggeratedly innocent voice he could muster.  “You wouldn’t want to deprive them of the best food in Paris. Would you, M’lady?”  The devilish grin in his eyes was a complete contrast to the innocent voice.  He turned back to the bats, the picture of politeness.  “The absolute best place to get pastries in Paris is Tom and Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie on Rue Gotlib.  It’s amazing.  I recommend trying… everything.  And it just so happens their daughter is one of the most amazing designers in… anywhere.”

Spoiler grinned at him.  “A man after my own heart.  Thanks, Kitty Cat.  I’ll take that under advisement.  And do you also frequent there?”  

Chat blushed slightly and looked away quickly, but not before Ladybug saw the reaction and smirked at him.  “Yes, he does,” she assured Spoiler.  “He frequently frequents there.”

“And what about you?” Red Hood interjected, leaning toward Ladybug again, much to Batman’s chagrin.

“Are you kidding?  She’s the reason I found it in the first place.  I swear she’s there daily,” Chat grinned.

“Ooh, Kitty Cat, you sure know the way to a girl’s heart,” Spoiler purred at him.  Chat’s cheeks burned red, but didn’t look away from her this time.

Ladybug pursed her lips in annoyance at his romantic interference but quickly smoothed out at the sight of his blush.  A smile was back on her face when she turned back to the Bats, eyes lingering a bit longer on Red Hood before moving to Batman. “Anyway, we will see you again tomorrow. But Chat, maybe you should get an idea of what Spoiler likes so you can bring treats for her to the meeting tomorrow.  I have to go though.”  She waved at the bats before turning to Chat with a wink.  “Have a good night.”

Red Hood stepped forward before she jumped away. “You don’t want to know what I like for tomorrow?” he asked huskily.

She looked up at him with a sultry smirk.  “Oh, I think I have a pretty good idea of what you like.  Sweet dreams.”

Red Hood watched her jump away.  “Oh they will be,” he whispered to himself.

<><><><><> 

Marinette had been apprehensive all morning.  Every time the bell above the door rung, she braced for the bats.  She let out a relieved breath as a man walked in by himself.  She wasn’t positive, but she was pretty sure the group would come in together.  She wasn’t sure why she knew that, but somehow she was confident of it.  The man blinked a few times at her before smiling charmingly at her.

And damn if that smile couldn’t melt ice.  She let out another breath, this one to calm her cheeks.  She smiled at him, warmer than her regular customer service smile.  “Can I help you, monsieur?”

“Do you, by any chance, have a bowl or something I can put some water in?” he asked awkwardly in barely accented French.  The cocked head and curious look Marinette gave him prompted him to continue.  “I wanted to… there’s this stray dog outside and he looks like he needs some water.”

American, she noted… with dimensions roughly matching Red Hood’s.  And oh God, those muscles weren’t just the suit.  Well fuck.  Guess she did give him some luck after all.  “Of course he’s fucking Adonis hot,” she muttered under her breath, but apparently not quietly enough.  He smirked at her and chuckled.

Marinette’s eyes snapped up to him and she blushed furiously at having gotten caught.  She took a deep breath and smiled back at him.  “Blonde with a dark stripe down his back?”  He nodded at her, a surprised look on his face.  “That’s Éclair.  He’s a local stray.  An absolute sweetheart.  Here, let me get the bowl I usually use for him.”  She rushed to the back and came back with a filled dog bowl and some pancetta. “Can you give him this too, please?  I usually do, but I’ve been stuck inside most of the morning.”

He gave her another ice meltingly brilliant smile and nodded in thanks.

She tensed at the next man who walked in, not really knowing why she was apprehensive.  Red Hood was already there.  She gave him her customer service smile even as her eyes darted out the window to watch Red Hood feeding Éclair.  She could imagine the hearty laugh he let out when Éclair leaped up to lick his face.  She smiled at the sight.  

“Excuse me,” the man stepped into her line of sight.

She immediately turned to focus on him, regretfully tearing her eyes away from Red Hood and Éclair.  “Yes, monsieur.  Sorry about that.  How can I help you?”

The man looked her up and down and leaned toward her. “I was looking for something sweet. Maybe you could help me.”

She cringed internally, but gave him a strained smile as she leaned away.  “Of course, sir.  We have a lot of sweet treats.  Maybe you can look over the petit fours, éclairs, macarons, and tartlets.  Let me know if you have any questions.”

“I have a question already,” the man gave her a leering smile.  “Are any of the treats as sweet as you?”

She gave him a flat look and took a step back. She almost missed the door chime ringing.  “I assure you, monsieur, you would find me far from sweet. Let me know when you’re ready to order.” She turned away and started wiping the counter instead.

Red Hood took the opportunity to step up to her and pass the bowl back to her.  “Thank you. He looked very happy after the treats.”

Marinette blinked at him a few times and looked down at the bowl unmoving for a few seconds before the reason clicked for her. “Right,” she answered, louder than she meant to, as she took the bowl.  “Can I get you anything?”

“What do you recommend?” he asked as he moved to block the other man’s line of sight to her.

She smiled appreciatively at him.  Maybe he was impressive after all.  “You looking for something sweet or savory?  We have great bread, but if you’re looking for a treat, I would recommend an assortment of eclairs.  It just seems apropos.  Honestly, I think it’s all good, but I’m a bit biased.” She leaned in as if confiding a secret and winked at him.  

He chuckled and nodded.  “That is definitely something to consider.”  He side eyed the other man in the store.  “I’ll take a look around I think.  Figure out what it is I want.”

Marinette nodded and gave him an understanding smile. She turned to the other man.  “Have you decided, monsieur?”

The man made a show of looking around.  “Are you on the menu?  Because I definitely know what I’m interested in,” the man answered, leering at her again.

Marinette gave the man a flat look.  It was not the first time she’d heard the line.  She didn’t get it as much as waitresses, but still, it was a tired line… from a married man… that she had already turned down. “No, sir.  I’m not on the menu,” she answered curtly, “because we are not a brothel, which are illegal in Paris, I might add.  However, a quick internet search will direct you to the areas of the city where you can find that kind of menu items.  If you would like one of the pastries, please let me know which ones you would like, otherwise, please leave.”

“I’m not good enough for you, but you’ll flirt with him,” he motioned toward civilian Red Hood.

“First, I get to choose who I’m interested in and that isn’t you.  Second, he,” she motioned toward civilian Red Hood, “called dibs on flirting with me.  Now either order or leave.”

The man huffed and left, trying to slam the door on the way out.  The door closed with a gentle thud.  Marinette rolled her eyes.  “Sorry about that, monsieur.  Are you ready to order?”  She sent him an apologetic smile.

Jason stared at her for a few beats trying to figure out if her previous words meant anything.  She could have just said that because the guy was an asshole.  It could be a coincidence.  And her partner could have sent him here purely because they had really good food.  “Oh, um… what do you recommend I take?” he asked again absentmindedly, his mind still on how likely it was that it was all a coincidence.

Marinette smiled innocently at him.  “Me out.”

Jason looked at her wide eyed.  “What?”

“You asked what I recommended you take.  I recommend you take me out,” she shrugged nonchalantly, but the grin was devilish.

Jason opened his mouth and closed it again. “Any other day, beautiful.  Any other day I’d say yes, but I’m kind of working on someone else and I’m a one woman man.”

Marinette looked at him for a few seconds, a brilliant smile beaming at his response.  

“Thanks for helping out, Sweetie,” her mom called coming from the back room.  “I think we have it covered now.  Oh,” she looked up at Jason, then at Marinette’s smile, and back to Jason. She smirked at the two.  “I think you should be able to take off now, get to your real job.”

Marinette nodded and took her apron off, stowing it under the counter.  “Thanks, Maman.” She leaned up and kissed her cheek before making her way around the counter. Jason turned to her as she walked out, watching her as she moved.  She paused a few feet in front of him.  “I have to admit, you impressed me after all.”  

She smiled sweetly at him before moving to the door.  She turned back at the last second, twirling to face him.  “But you flirted much better with the helmet.”  She winked at him and disappeared through the door.

Her mom chuckled before clearing her throat. “Anything I can help you with, dear?”

Jason turned to her blankly, still processing what Marinette had said, after a second he smiled and rushed to the door.  “No, thank you ma’am.  I have some dibs to collect on.”

Tags:

@jasonette-july-event @maribatserver

[dead-lesbians]

I’m talking about my Forzen headcannons!!

- Forzen can’t control his teleporting. He will simply get teleported somewhere at random. However, he usually can’t leave until he finishes something, like in a video game where you have to complete an objective before you can leave. And usually he doesn’t know what this is so he just has to fuck around and find out.

- Forzen is Dr Coomers son (shout out to that one post that brought this headcannon up, if I find it I will link back to it). However, neither of them know this. BUT both of them have more knowledge on each other than they should. One of coomers wife’s left him way before he man knew she was pregnant.

- butch lesbian. I am allowed to be self indulgent and headcannon him as a butch lesbian (he’s also gender apathetic and uses he/they/she/it pronouns)

- He’s shit at video games. Plays them. Is bad. Always blames the controller. Has broken many.

-Forzen was probably part of some fucked up Military experiments as a kid.

-It’s actually SUPER good with kids. Like it can get a crying baby to calm down within 5 minutes every time.

-she has a half brother, he’s called Jeremy and is like 10 years old. He’s a super smart nerd and is the reason Forzen hasn’t actually died by doing something extremely stupid. Forzen really cares for her brother, very protective of him.

- her relationship with the science team isn’t TOO bad, but they are all kinda waiting for Tommy to forgive her before anything, and Tommy does NOT like Forzen. At least for a while. Eventually they make up (and then they make out)

-they have quiet a few tattoos, most of which are not done professionally. When they eventually make up with the science team , they let them draw tattoos on their back. Benrey absolutely drew a penis to try annoy them but Forzen thought it was funny.

- Benrey and Forzen are exs. They broke up for a really stupid reason as well. They started dating, Benrey assumed Forzen was a gay dude and Forzen assumed Benrey was some weird lesbian. They assumed wrong. And only found out like a year into the relationship, they’d probably moved in together and everything. Now they are super sour about eachother.

-I think Forzen would actually get on well with Gordon.The two will stay up late talking, Forzen kinda has no filter and Gordon has gotten so sick of everyone’s shit that they are just super honest at this point and give eachother advice. It’s definitely a little gay too but only the rest of the science team actually realises this.

- I’ve said this already but sunkist and Forzen are BESTIES. Like Forzen probably apologised to Sunkist , and like he genuinely felt super bad and you could tell and so sunkist gives him and a chance and turns out they get on super well. Sunkist will go to his place and they’ll sit and watch irate gamer videos. Sunkist is also somehow better at video games at him. She always wins in Mario kart.

-Darnold and Forzen…their just gay man. I could make an entire post about these two’s relationship alone. Darnold probably tried to stop Forzen from taking sunkist, (it was very open about dognapping her) but Forzen just laughed, called them cute, and left.

- they love going to the gym me thinks.

- Sad ahead wuhoh. Forzen will sometimes not be able to sleep because of chronic pain. Turns out being in the military can kinda fuck up your body. It’s one of the few times she will cry. She probably sits up silently sobbing to herself, not only because everything hurts (and medicine that hasn’t been prescribed can only do so much) , but also because she knows her days of like, still being able to function normally with0 help is limited and she doesn’t wanna bother anyone by asking for help, but she kinda needs it.

(Implied suicidal thoughts in the next one btw)

-relating to the last one. When she finally DOES reach out for help, it’s probably Gordon she goes to first. Mainly because of the arm thing. She probably went to Gordon and went ‘yo bro can I ask for some advice’ and Gordon probably thought it was something kinda dumb but then she just starts opening up about these serious fucking issues with her body and how some nights it’s so painful that she wishes she could fall asleep and never wake up and Gordon’s just like ‘???? Wh??’ Because he did NOT expect that.

-has fat tits /hj

[melk917]

if you’re a woman then you shouldn’t be “fawning” over gay relationships. It would be weird if we did it and we already gets to much hate for liking lesbians.

Anon. I seriously considered just deleting this because engaging in anonymous debates on the internet is never a good use of anyone’s time. (And since it's anon, I can't just reply to you). But I’m going to take a stab at this in the end because I find it to be a dangerous mindset. So, I want to take a moment to try and make this a learning opportunity.

To be clear, what I did (I’m assuming) was reblog a few gif sets with two characters from a TV show in them. Now, sure, I think these two characters would make a great couple. They are both super smart, they have great banter, they push each other to be better at their jobs and better people. All things that good couples should do. But to be abundantly clear, they are also fictional and not in a relationship in the show. I looked at two separate characters and thought to myself, “Oh, they would be a cute couple.”

What your comment is attempting to do (quite frankly, with a lack of understanding of definitions and grammar) is to gatekeep the media I can and can not enjoy. And that is both dangerous generally (if you keep people out of all spaces, how will anyone ever learn about other people?), and also not something I will let you do.

So first off, I encourage you to look up some of these terms you’re using before coming for me. To fawn has two definitions:

I think we all can agree it’s not the second entry you intend to accuse me of. So, I assume you mean to say that I in some way am attempting to court favor with cringing and overly flattering behavior over a gay relationship.

I do not believe I have in any way ever done this. But by all means, if there is a particular post of mine like this, feel free to point it out. Shoot me a message and I’m happy to chat and take constructive feedback. But please, make it real constructive feedback.

But given the information I have, I am led to believe you object to my reblog of several gif sets in recent days.

Aside from your characterization of my reblogs being incorrect, I worry that your mindset here is a dangerous, exclusionary one. It discourages allyship by telling any one who is not an exact definition of a thing that they can not enjoy or support that thing. That they should not experience it or learn about it. They shouldn’t try to expand their worldview with opinions and life experiences that are not their own.

By what you are saying, you are implying that I should not be supportive of a good friend of mine and his husband. Should I not have celebrated with them when they got married seven years ago? Was I wrong to be moved to tears by their vows? Should I decline his invites to go out clubbing with them? Should I say thanks but no thanks when they want to talk about challenges they face as gay men, because I will never face those same issues?

To do these things, I would both be telling them that they are too “other”, and that I am saying their challenges are not also challenges I could maybe help change if I only make sure I understand.

Now. The flipside of that is that as someone who is not a gay man, it is 100% my job to listen and support everywhere I can, and to respect that in some of these instances, I’m being invited into spaces that weren’t built for me. In those spaces, I am being invited to listen and experience and learn. It is never my job to run these spaces. It is a gift I have been given to be invited in, and it's imperative that I respect that.

But to consume media freely provided on the internet? To enjoy books and TV shows and movies and fanfiction? Yes, I can and I will. And especially any books, tv, or movies – anything produced where I hand over cash for these things. It proves there’s an audience. That people, no matter what groups they belong to, love the content. And it … surprise, will generally lead to even more of that content being produced. Which means that people from those groups see themselves in more media. They see their experiences and see that they are not the only one, they are not alone. And they, in turn, can produce more. This is a positive cycle, no matter what the group is.

But also, my friend is also just my friend, and he and his husband are a loving, supportive couple that anyone, gay, straight, or otherwise, would be lucky to emulate. To say so, and to say it loudly, is not fawning. It’s not fetishizing. It is supportive, and I would consider myself lucky to have a relationship like that one day.

I’m sorry if someone told you that you weren’t allowed to enjoy a fictional representation of a lesbian relationship. That is also gatekeeping. Read the media you enjoy. Ship who you want to ship. Write the fic you want to write. You shouldn’t be told you’re not allowed.

And I think it’s also critical to remind you, and anyone else trying to lay down some fandom policing law…. This is all fictional. It’s all made up and none of it is real and it's really not all that serious. In fact, it’s fiction OF fiction. In this case, they are two characters in a TV show. All we know about them in terms of their personal lives is they’ve had romantic feelings for women in the past. Literally anything else is a personal headcanon, your own personal fiction. So let your personal headcanon flourish. But just because you have one, doesn’t mean I can’t have mine.

So read what you want, ship what you want, write what you want. And I’m going to continue to do the same.

You’re certainly free to unfollow me. I won’t be offended if my content is not your cup of tea. But I also won’t allow you to gatekeep me from what I reblog.

And on that note – unless you have something constructive to point out or a specific post of mine that represents your point that I can learn from, this is my final word on this topic. Because without being able to point to specifics, I’m going to assume you’ve just decided you have a problem with me personally living my life in my corner of the internet and I’m too old to care beyond this.

[studyingmoominvalley]

My analysis of the Moominvalley (2019) season 2 soundtrack

I am skipping songs that are unnecessary, so I’m sorry First Day of My Life, you’re a bop but you just don’t mean shit. You’re happy and upbeat, my analysis is never like this.

Homesick by Cavetown:

Gotta love me some Cavetown, and Robbie’s songs pretty much always have a deeper meaning. SO LET’S LOOK IN!

“My, oh my, the sky's so much bigger than we thought/And I wanna see it all”. This can be from the perspective of someone who wishes to travel, who hasn’t seen the world as much as Snufkin has. So this is a Moomintroll song. He doesn’t know that much about the world, only getting it read to by his Pappa and his memoirs. But for someone as self-confident as Pappa, the world is possibly a lot more than what he lets on. And that is what Moomin wants to know. He wants to start his own adventure, and this is what the end of season 2 and what we have seen of season 3 seems to let on. However, as much as Moomin longs for adventure, he longs for home just as much. This topic is explored in Farewell Snorkmaiden. He has an attachment to anything related to his home or his Mamma that he just can’t start his own free life with Snorkmaiden. Just because he doesn’t want to let his friends go, doesn’t mean he’s ready to leave home. Just because he wants the world, doesn’t mean he’s ready to give up a part of it. He’s having so much fun adventuring, being his own Moomin. But he just can’t be away from home. He’s homesick, as the title suggests.

Something New by girl in red:

LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO! I love me some girl in red too, but this is analysis time, not reviewing.

Moomin longs to travel south with Snufkin. I think pretty much almost all of these songs will be him longing to be free like Snufkin, but this is probably because he’s a gay fucking mess. Lil bitch. Anyway yeah. Moomin longs to travel south with Snufkin. He’s probably, like, trying to find him in the Winter or something because of lyrics like “We’ve only just started, so hold on”, “There’s no looking back now, I’ll stay here” and “I hope to be there someday”. He just wants to be where Snufkin is, see him, travel with him. But he thinks of a place that “looks like a fairytale”, which shows this is all an unrealistic fantasy he wishes to live out. Snufkin needs his alone time, Moomin is just being a gay bastard.

God damn it Made of Stone. I just can’t analyze you. You’re here to guilt trip Moomin, you made me sob in a fake out episode, I love you but there is just no story in you. You’re a sob story, and I love you for it.

Cloudy Eyes by New Ro

Such vibes. Anyway.

Moomin stop being gay. This is a Snufmin song, don’t change my mind, you can’t. Snufkin and Moomin are out of touch in their ways of life, Moomin being attached to home and Snufkin being a wanderer at heart, but yet their connection to each other is still so strong. Despite their differences, they can’t help being attracted to each other. Moomin feels like he’s himself, everything is good, when Snufkin is there with him. He hopes that Snufkin never stops returning to the valley, he hopes nothing changes within Snufkin or their relationship. He makes him feel free. And he wonders if this feeling can last forever.

Change Is Gonna Know My Name you fucking AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

How DARE you be so good in an episode with the WORST moment and WORST representation of Thingumy and Bob! HOW DARE YOU! Sniff better get a proper redemption. He better be friends with Stinky and be gay and do crime! YOU FAILED! YOU FAILED WHERE IT WAS SO EASY TO SUCCEED! GOD DAMN IT! Anyway if you got the hint we’re skipping this one.

Start Again by BOBBi

Gotta say I love this composer name. Lol Bobbie. GAWD DAMMIT BOBBIE. Anyways.

I don’t even need to say this is Snorkmaiden and Moomin, the show already tells us. But BEST FRIENDS?! WHAT IS GUTSY TELLING US?! So, maaaaaaaaybe…

At the end of the episode this is from, they imply a breakup, which is also implied with the use of “best friend” instead of “lover”. The song is about starting again, building up the foundation for them to live together and work on themselves. They don’t need to do this though. They’re picking out the relationship they don’t need and working on it because they feel they want it. The final chorus does prove my analysis a bit.

“Even if it's make believe/Even if I know you're gonna leave/Even if it makes me sad/You are my best friend, we can start again”. Snorkmaiden is aware that this relationship isn’t working. She knows that it won’t stay together and that Moomin is going to leave at some point. But she wants to give him a chance. She has the chance to salvage something that was broken and maybe just fix it into something platonic. He’s her best friend. They can start this again as a new friendship. A new home. They’re building a metaphorical home, a home for their romance to retire and their friendship to heal.

A Place To Call Home by jens

This song is so nice, it makes me happy.

This song is definitely about the lighthouse but I’m not boring am I? I’m pulling out Snufkin. Moominvalley has so many interesting things about it. Secrets, magic, strange people. He travels to and from this place so much that it feels like a place he can call home. Not his real home, but at least one that feels like home and somewhere he can stay for as long as he needs to. He even finds home in the Moomin family. They have their flaws, but it gives them charm. Especially Moomin. He’d rather not call anywhere else his home, this is his place to call home.

Cloudy by Vilma Alina

Fucking C L O U D Y! I love this soundtrack so much istg.

Yep. November in Moominvalley. Snufkin longing for the Moomin family, mainly Moomin. The world feels right with them around, but it feels wrong without them. Now he’s stuck with these weird ass people. But Toft is there too and we love them so I guess it isn’t too bad.

That’s my analysis! Now to wait for season 3!!!

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

I don’t get you, CJ. Why are you so quick to throw around the term “bad writing” when you don’t agree with something? Why not simply chalk it up to having different likes or dislikes than other people and move on?

Instead of deconstructing characters you don’t like, why not use your platform to empower other voices and highlight others with different tastes or opinions than you? Different people notice different things about the games. That’s one of the nice things about fandom.

You clearly love writing and analysis, but when you post answers to asks that hold different opinions than you’re own, you often go “you’re valid, but…” and launch into paragraphs upon paragraphs of your opposite opinion rather than truly exploring theirs.

I guess what I’m trying to say is I think your blog and analyses would be stronger if rather than dismissing plot points or characters as “bad writing” you step outside yourself and ask others what they see in that writing since it’s not connecting with you.

To be fair, anon, I don't get me either.

But I hear you, so if you'll allow me to do the thing where I launch into paragraphs upon paragraphs, let's talk about this.

I assume this might've come about because of the recent Violet talk here? Or maybe it's from older posts, I dunno, you didn't specify so I can only speculate and use the Violet posts as the main example here.

So here's the thing... deconstructing characters and storylines is something I enjoy doing. Hell, it's one of my favorite things to do. It doesn't matter if I like or dislike the character, or if I agree with plot directions, or if I think it's "good" or "bad" writing. That's how I work things out for myself, how I try to understand why I'm feeling the way I am about certain characters and story elements. I break apart the different aspects of these things and analyze them so that I can improve the content I create and try to avoid the same mistakes I've come across that I wanted to be better.

When it comes to me tossing around "bad writing", or just implying it, I'm not trying to say that "bad writing = trash, garbage, unenjoyable, anyone who likes this is a dingus, how could you?" it's more "I see flaws here and I want it to be better, I know it can be better and it frustrates me that I can't fix it," y'know?

And I'm fully aware that other people might not see it that way. With that basketball Violet post, I know that a lot of the Violet crowd are gonna read that and be like "no, I love the bell tower scene! It fits well with her character! What are you talking about?" and that's fine, I expect that. That post was me writing something that's been on my mind that I wanted to share, it wasn't me trying to scold anyone for liking it or trying to dismiss their feelings about it.

When it comes to differing opinions, especially on Violet, I've come to the conclusion that we just gotta agree to disagree. I've tried for years at this point to understand the appeal of Violet and gone looking for answers about her in hopes of being enlightened, and I have asked around.

In the past, I have made posts inquiring about what people see in Violet [Minerva, too] and why they prefer Violentine, and I got little to nothing in response. So I totally get where you're coming from when you say I should ask others what they see in the writing that I don't, but there's only so much I can do when no one is willing to answer me. So, I have to look around myself.

I've searched through several threads on reddit and none of them have been insightful, unsurprisingly.

That's what sparked my mini-rant about Louis before. On reddit, a lot of the answers on why people like Violet are either "she sided with Clementine, she's just really sweet deep down, she has more trauma, and lesbian," or "I like Violet more because Louis is a traitor," and what the hell am I supposed to get out of that, y'know? They're not really telling me anything, they're just looking to argue among themselves and I've had to throw in the towel on that one.

I've had better luck here, having read some truly insightful posts about Violet, her arc, and her relationship with Clementine. The conclusion I've reached it that the things people find appealing about her are things that I don't.

If you need an example, we'll use the aftermath of Marlon's murder when Violet turns on the group to defend AJ. Every post from the Violet crowd I've read that talks about that scene praises her for turning against her friends/family to defend AJ when they were gonna attack him, it shows what she's willing to do for them, that's something that drew them to her. Then there's me, who sees that as adding unnecessary aggression to the situation when none of them were going to attack AJ, they weren't looking at AJ, and none of this is helping. Neither of these interpretations are wrong.

Guess what I'm trying to get at is I'm one person, and having discussions takes more than one willing person.

Moving on, "when you post answers to asks that hold different opinions than you’re own, you often go “you’re valid, but…” and launch into paragraphs upon paragraphs of your opposite opinion rather than truly exploring theirs."

I've thought about this for a while, and maybe I do actually do this but don't realize it. I like to think that I'm engaging with the ideas that people send me, but I dunno, maybe I can be dismissive of things because I have a hard time being objective. That's something I've always struggled with, and I'm sorry if I ever came across as dismissive or didn't fully explore ideas, that's something I can definitely get better at.

As for "why not use your platform to empower other voices and highlight others with different tastes or opinions than you? Different people notice different things about the games. That’s one of the nice things about fandom."

I've done character nights, ship nights, season nights, etc. for about two years, give or take. That's what those nights were about. Usually, I'd put up a poll and we'd all vote on what we wanted to discuss, and then the floor was open for anyone to give their input, and we'd discuss.

I stopped doing them a little while ago because I was burnt out on themed nights. Remembering to make new polls, setting aside part of my weekends to spend hours answering asks the best I could, usually dealing with other projects on top of it all.... it may not seem like it, but god, those nights took a lot out of me. I loved doing it! Having those discussions were some of the best parts of running this blog, but now my new job has me working 40+ hours a week, four days with ten hour shifts and occasionally some overtime on the weekends, I just don't have it in me anymore to do it every single weekend. Not with how tired I am and with all the other projects I'm working on.

That's why I've started testing the waters with these shorter posts of me throwing out ideas or going on mini-rants. They're something simple I can do with no pressure, just me with an empty document getting whatever's on my mind out... and it helps that it feels like my last fuck has just flown away to the heavens to weave itself into the boat god's beard like as he sails among the clouds and stars..... so now I'm gonna talk about whatever I want and the fact that it's my opinion is implied.

I'm sorry if I'm coming off as a little defensive with this part, I tend to get that way whenever people tell me what I should or shouldn't do with my blog, even if they're just trying to be helpful and I don't believe you have any ill intent with your message. I've had this blog for three years now, and I've always had people telling me I shouldn't do character analyses, I should stay in my lane, just write fanfics and do character nights. I should answer more asks otherwise people will think I don't care. I shouldn't write headcanon posts, that's what other blogs do and I'll be taking content away from them. I shouldn't write that one au I've always wanted to because I should be working on [with you]. I shouldn't write anything but [with you.] I shouldn't talk about Violet because I'm a Louis blog.

And that's dumb. All of that is dumb! No one owns the concept of headcanon posts or character analyses! Just like how I don't own the concept of character nights!

Again, my last fuck is lost in Kenny's beard, I don't have it anymore. I'm going to write and analyze whatever I want, when I want, and the best I can do is promise to be better. My inbox is open, I'll try to answer and engage with you guys when I can, I'll keep doing these posts where I ramble about whatever topic is on my mind, and I shouldn't have to put a disclaimer of "This is all my opinion and it's okay if you disagree, I'm not trying to invalidate you" because that's implied.

Before I close out this long response, I do wanna add a thank you for the ask, I do appreciate the constructive criticism. Usually anons that have any problem with me after I talk about Violet will just call me a piece of shit and tell me to delete my blog. Maybe this helped you, maybe it didn't, either way thanks :)

[johannstutt413]

(requested by calligomiles; continuing from this)

“She shot her through the heart,” Platinum said, describing the same scene Nearl and Meteor had just watched with her. “How poetic.”

“In the end, it was the only way to get her feelings through to her. How tragic.” The knight wiped a tear from her eye with a tissue.

The guerilla looked at the pair of them, somewhat confused, as she hit the pause button on the remote. “Nothing about this movie has implied that.”

“You don’t think so?” The assassin shook her head. “I suppose you just don’t understand it the way we do.”

“There’s nothing to understand, though; they’ve seen each other once before, when Esau invited them both to the same party, and Jubilee died just now because she tried to sleep with him after he’d asked Belladonna to stay the night. They were basically strangers.”

Nearl chuckled. “Oh, Meteor, it’s not that simple. During that party, in the background of one of the scenes, Belladonna is clearly making out with someone wearing a skirt just like the one Jubilee’s wearing in this scene.”

“I don’t believe it...” Still, she knew the knight wouldn’t lie about something like this. “Here, Plat; rewind it to that part.”

“If you think it’ll help. Tell me when to stop, dear.”

After watching the past thirty minutes of film on high speed and reversed, Kazimierz’s most radiant squeezed the assassin’s hand. “Right there. Back left corner; do you see them?”

“Oh, wow...And we know she doesn’t drink because of the first date-” The guerilla stopped mid-sentence. “Wait, why did you pick this movie again, Platinum?”

“Maggie and I watched it the other night and thought you might like it,” she replied.

Meteor turned to look at her. “And out of curiosity, is it because of this secret truth you found?”

“No; we thought you would appreciate another Kuranta woman acting like a badass.” Nearl cracked open a soda bottle and took a drink. “Unless you are enjoying the underlying girls’ love narrative, in which case it was entirely intentional.”

“Alright, are we good to continue? We still have another two hours to go, after all.” Platinum let go of the knight to take a swig from the bottle she’d been offered.

The third wheel simply nodded. “Yes, let’s keep going. I have to wonder where they’ll find enough plot to keep it going that long.”

Despite her concerns, they did in fact manage to stitch together another 2 hours worth of story, even if one or two points were strained; what had started as a somewhat typical love-triangle-gone-wrong turned into a battle with the ghosts of guilt, regret, and escaping punishment as the narrative took a background detail, made the same observations Nearl and Platinum had, and bundled it into a package with a very real manhunt as Belladonna, after killing Jubilee and not facing legal action for it, became the enemy of the crime family her victim had had connections to, leading to a typical “unlikely action hero versus gang of mooks they end up destroying” with a bizarre underlying commentary on the circumstances that led to it and the pointlessness of it all, ultimately leading to the protagonist, the gang leader, and Esau (now working with the gang after being rejected) dying together as the warehouse they were dueling in collapsed.

“I...” As the credits rolled, Meteor was in utter disbelief. “I have never seen a movie anything like this.”

“The writing team hasn’t made any more - we looked - but apparently they’re working on something right now. Did you like it?” The assassin looked at her expectantly.

The woodsman thought for a moment. “I have some questions, but more for myself than anyone. It was interesting; I’d probably watch another like it if they make one.”

“Questions, you say?” Nearl stood from the couch to put on the next movie. “What kind of questions, if I may?”

“By the end of that movie, I wanted to fill that void in her life for her...”

Platinum had a strange sense she knew where this was going. “So that’s your type of girl? I would never have guessed.”

“I didn’t realize I had a type.” Meteor shook her head. “Maybe that’s why I never wanted to do more than tease the Doctor...”

“What a way to figure out you’re a lesbian, huh? I’m glad mine was straightforward,” the assassin sighed with a smile, leaning back deeper into the couch.

Nearl smiled as she returned from putting in Revenge on Aegir. “I found out during my time as a squire. The first time I helped my mistress don her armor, I had to stop myself from letting my hands wander.”

“Changing room for you, too, then?” A selection of flashbacks played through her mind. “The Anti-Knight changing area was a wild place when I went through my initial training...Hmm.”

“Hmm?” The woodsman watched her fellow Sniper’s gears turn.

The knight did as well, but she knew well enough to take a guess. “Yes, Platinum, I have noticed her combat outfit, and I very much approve.”

“Thought so.” Platinum smiled at the confused Meteor. “Maggie has a thing for girls’ abs.”

“Really? No wonder you enjoyed the movie, then. You’re referring to my outfit, I assume?”

The assassin nodded. “I’m not the only Kuranta she’s had her eyes on...and honestly, I totally get it. The other day I heard someone call you a ‘team mom,’ and you definitely rock those jeans like one.”

“Oh my.” She was getting a feeling she’d never had before. “I can’t remember the last time someone was so forward towards me.”

“Too much?” Nearl asked, setting her head on Plat’s shoulder to see her face better.

Meteor shook her head. “No, it’s just...gratifying, I suppose you could say. I may need to explore this some more.”

“Hmm.” Platinum shared a glance with the knight on her shoulder. “I wonder where she’d find help with that.”

“Yes, I wonder.” They both broke into knowing smiles.

The third Kuranta, knowing how to read a room, chuckled. “I’m not which is worse - the fact it was so easy for you to decide that for yourselves, or the fact I’m looking forward to where it will lead.”

“Oh, I’m sure it will be fine. Here, switch spots with me.” The assassin offered her seat. “This one’s a slasher, and the last time I tried watching it, I buried my head in Maggie’s chest for half of it, so be ready for that.”

“Oh my...I’ll try to be.” The thought alone made her blush.

[thecaffeinebookwarrior]

The Many Faces of the Strong Female Character

The much-requested, positive counterpart to my classic “Female Characters to Avoid in Your Writing” and it’s much-later sequel.  

Here, I will discuss some of my favorite fictional ladies and what makes them work so well;  given my rapturous love of women, there will probably be a sequel!  In the meantime, I talk more about portraying female characters here.

Happy writing, everybody!  <3

1.)  The Warrior

(Gif credit.) 

When most people hear “strong female character,” they picture the most popular definition of the term:  a stony-faced, emotionally shallow, conventionally attractive broad who punches and kicks stuff.  She may occasionally shout things like, “I DON’T NEED NO MAN,” while perhaps punching a small baby. 

I decided to start with my wife Diana, because she is the perfect antithesis of this trope.  She isn’t stony, she’s courageous.  She’s unabashed about showing her doubts, hopes, affections, and optimism.  Her love interest never steals her spotlight, but she feels no need to shun romance to appear “strong.”  She’s beautiful, but not sexualized or objectified.

And while most Strong Female Characters™ are ironically reduced to damsels in distress at some point in their own narratives, Diana consistently takes the lead, totally autonomous over her own story.

You can kick ass AND love babies, people.  Joss Whedon, please take notes.

(Gif credit)

Other examples:  Okoye from Black Panther, Furiosa from Mad Max: Fury Road, Rey from Star Wars, and Ser Brienne of Tarth from Game of Thrones.

2.)  The Comedian

(Gif source)

If you haven’t watched Chewing Gum on Netflix, stop whatever you’re doing and watch it right now.  Its relatively simple premise – a twenty-four-year-old from a fundamentalist Christian household struggles to lose her virginity – is a segway into a hilarious, genuine exploration of human sexuality, relationships, and how we forge our identities.

Brilliantly portrayed by the series’ creator, Michaela Coel, Tracy is essentially that one friend who knows exactly what you’ve been thinking and isn’t afraid to say so.  She is never relegated to a single trope or stereotype.  She’s stumbling, clumsily but enthusiastically, through the life experiences that shape us.  Most importantly, she is allowed to be sexually curious, awkward, aggressive, insecure, and – I can’t stress this enough – hilarious.  The dialogue is infinitely quotable, and endlessly relatable. 

(Image source)

Watching shows like Chewing Gum makes me realize how few female characters – and even fe wer Black female characters – are portrayed as truly human.  Typically, they’re allowed to be sexy, but not sexual.  They’re allowed to be awkward, but only if it’s cute.  They can be insecure, but only if that insecurity can easily be solved by the affirmations of a male love interest.  And they’re rarely allowed to be the main source of a series’ comedy.  

So remember:  let your female characters be human.  Let them be awkward, funny, sexual philosophers.  It’s easier than you think.  

(Gif source)

Other examples:  Abbi and Ilan from Broad City, Leslie from Parks and Rec, Tina from Bob’s Burgers.

3.)  The Drama Queen

(Gif source)

Watching Riverdale is like hurtling along on a structurally unstable rollercoaster.  It’s utterly insane, a lot of fun, and once you’re on, you can’t stop.

But amidst the explosions of batshit crazy plot points, killer cults, and the existential perplexity of finding yourself attracted to emo Jughead, there are some real gems.  One of these is Cheryl Blossom, and pretty much every plot line surrounding her.

Cheryl is introduced as a fairly one-dimensional, catty mean girl, though the Regina George-esque charisma with which she’s portrayed makes her instantly likable.  Initially, we expect her to be a character we’ll love to hate.

(Gif source)

And yet, within the first few episodes, I was impressed by how layered and complex her motivations were.  Much of contempt towards others was misdirected rage from an upbringing of extreme emotional abuse, and grief over her dead brother -- all portrayed without a Snape-style condonation of said behavior.  By the end of season one, my thoughts were generally, “Oh, crap, I don’t think I can claim to be watching this ‘ironically’ anymore,” and “MORE CHERYL.”

(Gif source)

Season two answered my wish, and then some.  Cheryl was saved from an (impressively conscientiously portrayed) attempt at sexual assault by a pack of her female friends, and her attacker got the shit beat out of him in one of the most cathartic moments of modern television.

To the exaltation of my queer heart, she also came out as a lesbian, in a deeply moving story arc that I never would have expected from this show.  Without spoiling too much, she and her new love interest kissing in front of anti-gay propaganda footage was legitimately one of the most powerful moments I have ever witnessed.

(Gif source)

Before the season was over, she viciously threatened her abusive, homophobic mother while covered in blood, shot a serial killer with a bow and arrow, and joined a gang.  If that’s not gay culture, I don’t know what is.

Oh, how I wish this show was just about her.

Other examples:  Alexis from Schitt’s Creek.

4.)  The Lovable Bastard

(Gif source)

Ah, The Good Place.  I have never experienced such a breath of comedic fresh air.  A new philosophical principle each episode, examined and applied in hilarious and thought-provoking ways.  A complete absence of harmful stereotypes.  Incredibly lovable, three-dimensional, and ever-evolving characters. 

I was considering using my queen Tahani for this list, who externally larger-than-life and internally vulnerable after emotional abuse by her parents.  Also, she’s hilarious.  Everyone and everything in The Good Place is hilarious.  And I also thought about talking about Janet, who is the best character in anything ever, but of course:

(Gif source)

Instead, I’ll be talking about bisexual icon Eleanor, who is something very few female characters get to be:  the lovable bastard.

(Gif source)

Eleanor, when we first meet her, is not traditionally good in any sense of the word.  She turned down a high-paying job because she was expected to be nice to people.  She sold placebos to the elderly, and was great at it.  She was drunken, slovenly, hedonistic, and selfish.  And she’s instantly incredibly likable.

Why and how Eleanor is so enjoyable, even at her very worst, merits an essay all its own.  But in a nutshell:

We empathize with her.  We are introduced to “The Good Place” completely through her eyes.  We are in her shoes.  

The stakes are high.  When we discover that her entry into the good place was a mistake, we want her to be okay.

We come to understand her, and how her terrible childhood shaped her destructive behavior.  

She wants to be a better person, and with time, effort, and character development, we watch her become one. 

Not only is this an amazing lesson in how to endear audiences to your character, it is also infinitely refreshing.  The most famous lovable bastards are all men --  Han Solo, Dr. House, Captain Jack Sparrow, the Man With No Name, et cetera -- but women are rarely afforded the same moral complexity.  If a woman in fiction has done bad things, she’s not usually a lovable bastard.  She’s usually a bitch. 

Eleanor isn’t just a great character.  She conveys an important lesson:  women are people.  People with the same capacity for mistakes, growth, redemption, and love as anyone else.

(Image source)

Other examples: Chloe from Don’t Trust the B*tch in Apartment 23

5.)  The Cinderella

(Gif source)

Yep.  I said it.  Cinderella is a strong female character.

My girl not only survived in an abusive household, she persistently stayed positive.  She worked each day to make the best of an impossible situation, from which she had no means of escape.  That takes an insane amount of courage and tenacity. 

But Caff, I hear you scream, she needed help to escape!!  Well, my imaginary counterargument, so the fuck what?  MOST people need help to escape their abusive situations, and there’s no shame in that.  Accepting help from someone you trust is the best thing you can do in a situation such as that, and implying otherwise is horribly damaging to victims of abuse.  

But she married the prince, you more feebly protest.  Yes!  She did!  She found love and happiness and a great life in a socially influential position!  And that’s an amazing message!

So in the flurry of female warriors, let’s not forget Cinderella, who tells people that their terrible circumstances won’t last forever, to stay hopeful and kind, and that accepting help from a trusted friend can lead to a happy life.  

Cinderella is a bad bitch, and she deserves her happily ever after.

(Gif source)

Other examples:  For some reason, I’m thinking of Sansa from Game of Thrones.  When people try to discredit her as a strong character, they often make similar complaints.  But both, quite fittingly, end up as queens.

[thedreadvampy]

Like idk what you want from me here. If you want to engage me in a specific question about ace/aro identities, as I've said several times and nobody has ever actually done, then ask me the specific question. Don't fuck around with vague gestures at Points of Discourse and then get cross with me because I haven't answered the Exact Question you Didn't Ask But Expected Me To Intuit.

Preface: If you don't want to answer any of these because you are allo/allo and don't have a say because its not your place, say that. In fact, I'm asking these because you seem to do have opinions on things you shouldn't based off things you have said in the past.

I also want to state that I agree fully with your points about Martin- minus the blatant aphobia. Not just acephobia, arophobia as well.

1. Do you think qprs are problematic? I believe you once made a post saying roughly that qprs are just normal friendships, or something like that, that has since been deleted. What is your current opinion?

2. Are het aros lgbt?

3. Are het aces lgbt?

4. Cis aro/aces lgbt?

5. Cishet aro/aces?

6. Do the spectrums and micro identities exist? You've implied in the past they don't, in the post about how they were supposedly created from sex positivity

7. Can aros be in or desire romantic relationships?

8. Can aces have or desire sex?

9. Does the split attraction model exist and does it benefit people?

10. Can teenagers identify as aro/ace or do you think they're too young?

11. Can you be, say, an aroace lesbian, or an aroace gay, aroace bi, etc. Idk how to phrase this one but like can you be aroace and still id with another orientation?

I could send another anon detailing the aphobia in the post, because I at least am certainly not upset about Martin being sexual, rather it was the very blatant aphobia. It could have stemmed from ignorance, and if that's the case I don't mind explaining it.

Ok this is a lot of questions, some with quite involved answers, so I'm gonna answer them chunk by chunk so it's a bit more manageable, and then I might come back to some of the surrounding message. This isn't gonna be an immediate bang bang bang, but I'll try and work through them over the next couple of days.

Question 1

1. No, I don't think qprs are problematic. I don't necessarily understand them but I don't need to understand them to understand and respect that they're a thing that's important to a lot of people. I don't know what post you're referring to, but I'm surprised that you say it was deleted, because I very rarely delete posts except, occasionally, reblogs where people have flagged up misinformation or dogwhistles or which I reblogged by accident. tbh I'm the messiest online presence I'm way too lazy to delete past posts or block people even when I probably should bc I don't like to feel like I'm ~hiding evidence~. So I'm not saying you're wrong, you're probably totally right, but I'm surprised.

I'm thinking about what posts I've made that you could be thinking of, and obviously I don't remember everything I say on here bc I say A Lot and I actively post to get things out of my head so 🤷‍♀️ but I do remember making a post a while ago where I said that it was a normal expectation of friendship to have some friends close enough that you'll live with them, raise kids with them, etc, and I'm wondering if that was the post you're thinking of? I did have qprs in mind while writing that to a degree, but only because I think 'you wouldn't do this with your friends' is a very common argument people put forward about qprs and I think it's a weak argument, because many people have different definitions of friendship, and the only argument I think is needed for any sort of I Have X Emotional Relationship To This Thing is...I Have X Emotional Relationship To This Thing. Like you can't offer a universal materialist definition of the differences between romantic, queerplatonic, sexual and platonic relationships, because the boundaries are very personal and it's really an emotional and experiential difference. so if that is the post you're thinking of, I wasn't criticising The Concept Of QPRs as much as saying that I thought trying to put hard lines around What Friends Do Vs What QPPs Do was a) counterproductive when arguing with someone who thinks QPR is Just Normal Friendships bc. if they do those things with their friends then saying NO THIS IS A QPR THING just reinforces their existing belief that you're talking about the same thing as they mean by friendships and b) to me seems to set a painful expectation to young people that you can only get these kinds of close friendships occasionally and in the form of a QPR and it will be stigmatised and misunderstood (and depending on how people talk about it, is only accessible to aspec people and allo people should only expect it to come through romantic/sexual relationships), when in fact most people of most ages I know have friends with whom they can share things like housing, deep feelings, futures, finances, who they miss if they don't see for a few days, who are mutually supportive and vital to their wellbeing. I don't think that's mutually exclusive with the existence of QPRs though - like I personally don't know what the difference is between a QPR and a close friendship, but I also don't know what the difference is between a romantic relationship and a close friendship but I know there is one and I know it's not a question of What You Do but a question of How You Feel And Interact, and that's pretty hard to define in unambiguous terms.

Like generally I don't Not Think QPRs exist, and I think it's a dick move to try and tell people they're wrong about how they experience and define their relationships because???? how are you meant to know that better than the person whose relationship it is??? but I do think the way people talk about QPRs (both from the perspective of defending them and from the perspective of attacking them) is pretty rife with problems and I don't think it's invalidating the reality of QPRs to talk about where the arguments and language around them potentially falls down or has unexpected consequences.

On the other hand, I don't know if that actually is the post you're referring to - the reason I'm calling back to that is that that and a few resultant asks are the only time I remember talking about QPRs on here in the last year or so. So like, several of these questions reference past posts, which is very fair, but I do need it to be clear that, since I don't really tag anything and I don't have a great memory, I can only really speak to What I Think Now In This Context, not to what I posted in the past and what I was thinking when I posted it. Like, this isn't too deny responsibility - I reckon I'm responsible for what I post even if I don't still agree with it, which is why I don't tend to delete my own posts on purpose - but just to deny capacity, I guess? I don't really KNOW what I've posted so if you talk about it in vague terms (and I do understand that if it's been deleted there's not a lot you can do but that) I may not necessarily be responding to the part of it that's worried you, so if I'm not speaking to something specific I've said or done, it's not because I Don't Want To, I just don't necessarily know to.

I'm waffling about this because looking through your messages there's a lot of "you said X" and like. given that the intended message of the post that's kicked this off was very different to the message people have taken from it, it feels important to me to know whether if I looked at the posts you're referencing I'd be like "ah yeah I did believe that but now I believe X" or if it's more a situation of "oh right I can see how you took X from that but my thinking was more Y".

(also sometimes when people say "you made a post" they mean "you reblogged a post" and I am a compulsive discourse scroller so sometimes I reblog a random post to bookmark my place on someone's discourse blog or I accidentally longpress the reblog button while scrolling - I try to delete reblogs that I don't agree with but sometimes I miss some, all of which to say if there's a post on my blog that doesn't seem to reflect what I say in my original posts then it doesn't necessarily mean I'm a crypto-whatever so much as I'm very lazy and messy with my blog. Doesn't mean I shouldn't be held accountable for reblogs but it's useful to know if we're talking original content or reblogs bc I'm unlikely to fully accidentally make a post. but I quite often accidentally reblog stuff. I doubt this is the case with this sitch just bc of your phrasing but I want to cover my bases)

anyway tl;dr: no I don't believe that QPRs themselves are inherently problematic, nor do I think I have at any point believed that, but I do think that a lot of the language and ideas used to talk about them are based in miscommunication or absolutist ideas about relationships and can have damaging knock on effects.

[artificialqueens]

Ms. California - Chapter Two (Crygi) - Mik

AN: I have way too much free time on my hands and absolutely no drive to do my college coursework with everything that’s going on because of COVID-19, so here’s chapter two. Feedback is greatly appreciated, especially since it’s my first fic! :-) Hope you all enjoy!

Summary: Crystal moves to Los Angeles from Missouri and meets GiGi Goode, captain of the varsity cheer squad. Queue the 1990s lesbian high school AU that absolutely nobody asked for.

Crystal elects to walk home after school, waving goodbye to Jackie and Jan as they drive past her on the sidewalk. She needs time to think; to think about what to say to GiGi, to think about what Jackie told her, to think about her own intentions. She wonders when she should call, and what she should do if someone other than GiGi picks up the phone. Calling immediately after arriving home would be too soon, Crystal decides. Calling between the hours of five and six wouldn’t work either, she thinks, because most people are eating dinner. So, she decides to call at seven. Crystal doesn’t understand why she’s overthinking this. It’s a phone call - it’s not like she’s never made a call to a friend’s house before. 

But, Jackie did say that GiGi might have given Crystal her number on the premise of setting up a date. It all feels very overwhelming to Crystal; a few boys she considered friends were interested in her back home, and every time she found out about it, she would cease contact. Their interest made her uncomfortable, so why didn’t she feel like that about GiGi? Shouldn’t she feel the same level of discomfort towards the situation? Maybe it’s because Crystal doesn’t know for sure that GiGi is into her like that - GiGi could just want a friend in art class, but be too concerned with her self-image to hang out with Crystal at school. The strangest thing about the situation, however, is that even if it was a date, Crystal realizes she still wants to go hang out with GiGi. She tells herself it’s because she can always just say she didn’t know, and that she just wants to stay friends. That leads her back to square one: why doesn’t the idea of GiGi liking her make her uncomfortable? 

She arrives home at three thirty. Both of her parents are still at work, so she pulls her house key out of her backpack and unlocks the door. She’s somewhat thankful that both of her parents are gone; as close as she is with them, she needs space to think. And aside from that, like most of the people from her hometown, her parents aren’t wildly accepting of gay people. Thankfully, there is one person she knows she can get her thoughts out to. 

Crystal walks up the stairs and opens the door to her bedroom. It’s still filled with boxes yet to be unpacked, and her walls are a pasty yellow color; the previous inhabitant clearly didn’t have much of an eye for interior design. She knows she needs to unpack to make the room feel like home, but she hasn’t been able to bring herself to do much other than tack up a few pictures of her best friends to her wall and place her white bedspread - adorned with geometric shapes and squiggles - on her mattress. 

She grabs the bright purple cordless phone her parents gifted her for her eighteenth birthday and flops down onto her bed. She begins dialing her best friend’s number. She has it memorized; she’s been calling her every day since she moved.

“Hello?” Crystal recognizes her best friend’s light, airy voice on the other side of the line. 

“Hey, Heidi!” Crystal smiles. 

“Hey, girl! How are you?” 

“Good! Well, for the most part, I’m good. I miss you!” Crystal says. 

“I miss you too! School sucks without you, there’s nobody to pass notes with in math anymore,” Heidi jokes. 

“I wish I was back home,” Crystal mutters. “Everything is weird here and I feel so out of my element.”

“What’s going on, girl?” Heidi asks. 

“Oh… I don’t know. You know Jackie, my friend from art that I told you about?”

“Mhm.”

“Well, she told me she has a girlfriend -”

“She has a girlfriend?! As in, she’s gay?!” Heidi interrupts.

“Yeah, but that’s not really the point, I mean, I don’t care about that. Anyways,” Crystal continues, “she was telling me about how her girlfriend is on the cheer team with GiGi, the one that helped me find my art class.”

“Okay, yeah…” Heidi says curiously. 

“Well, GiGi is like, apparently not just into guys, she’s into girls.”

“Is that all?” Heidi asks. 

“Well, no, not really…” Crystal trails off.

“What is it?”

“Uh, Jackie seems to think that GiGi thinks I asked her on a date,” Crystal explains. 

“Seriously?! Did you?! Oh my lord!” Heidi exclaims. 

“No, I definitely did not!” Crystal counters, defending herself. “I asked if she wanted to eat lunch with me, and she said no because she’s popular or whatever. But then, she was like, ‘We should hang out tomorrow, ask Jackie for my number’”, Crystal mimics GiGi’s somewhat monotone voice. 

“And you did?”

“And I did,” Crystal confirms. “So now, I guess I might be going on a maybe-date with the head cheerleader tomorrow.”

“So, you’re gay now?” Heidi questions. Crystal knows that she doesn’t mean anything rude by it, but she can’t help but roll her eyes. 

“No, I’m not. I just want to be her friend. I think she’s cool. She’s kind of an enigma - she’s this cold, popular cheer girl, she’s in advanced art, she dresses like a supermodel - and she looks like one - and she’s gay.”

“She sounds interesting,” Heidi comments.

“Right?! This is why I’m feeling perplexed. I don’t know for a fact that it’s a date, and I don’t think I’ll know if it is until it’s too late, but I really want to go. Like, even if it’s a date, I want to go and then just try to be friends?” Crystal says, unsure of herself.

“Okay, yeah, that’s… something.” 

“Yep,” sighs Crystal. “You think I should go?”

“If you want to,” Heidi responds passively, “but girl, it sounds like you’re infatuated with her - you barely know her and you’re going on and on about her.”

“I’m not, I’m just… interested.”

“Whatever you say, Crys, whatever you say.”

Crystal hangs up the phone, somewhat frustrated with Heidi. She needed clarity, not more confusion. Was she infatuated with GiGi? No, infatuation implied some level of attraction, and Crystal was not attracted to girls. 

Crystal feels like she’s trying to convince herself of something now. She’d said some variation of “I’m not gay” five times in less than three hours, both to herself and to other people. 

~

Crystal tries to take her mind off of the situation by doing homework. That’s how she knows she’s stressed - she usually saves homework for six in the morning before she leaves for school. Procrastination is her modus operandi; now she’s just procrastinating on something else.

She’s writing an English essay in her living room when she hears her garage door open - her mom must be home. Crystal puts down her pencil and stands up from the table, ready to help her mom make dinner before her dad gets home. 

“Hi mom!” Crystal greets her as she walks in the door. 

“Hey sweetie,” her mom hugs her, “How was school today?

“It was fine,” Crystal says, “Nothing spectacular, but it was a good day!”

“Well, fine is better than bad!” Crystal’s mom shares her daughter’s positivity. “Ready to help with dinner?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Crystal grins, following her mom into the kitchen.

Crystal loves cooking - she’s not very good at it, but it’s fun. It’s always been her and her mom’s “thing”. 

Tonight, they’re making chicken tacos and grilled veggies. Crystal is in charge of chopping up the carrots and bell peppers - a difficult task to complicate. 

Crystal gets lost in her own thoughts as she chops and slices. She looks at her mother - a spitting image of herself. It’s like looking in a mirror that ages you twenty five years, Crystal thinks to herself. Her mom has the same long, dark, curly hair and thick eyebrows. They both have chocolate-brown eyes and the same goofy smile. They’re even the same height, both standing just above 5’5. They’re practically the same person - and Crystal is fine with that. Her mom is her favorite person, her best friend (though she’d never tell Heidi that), and her role model..

That’s why she decides to test the waters with the GiGi situation, struggling to push her thoughts about the younger girl out of her head. 

“So,” Crystal begins, “I think I’m going to hang out with a friend tomorrow night.”

Her mom turns away from the stove, shifting to look at Crystal from across the small kitchen. “Oh honey, that’s wonderful! You’re making friends already!”

“Yeah, I am,” Crystal tentatively starts. “Well…”

“Well what?” her mom asks, sensing the hesitancy in her voice. 

“I don’t know. I think the friend I’m hanging out with might think it’s a date, or something,” Crystal explains. 

“A date!” her mom beams. “Is he cute? Do you like him?”

“Um…” Crystal pauses, unsure of what to say next. She could tell her GiGi is a girl - it would take three seconds. She plays the conversation in her head, and it doesn’t go well. “No, I don’t think so. Not like that at least. But as a friend, they’re fascinating.”

“Hm. Are you still going to hang out with him?”

“Yeah, I think so - I don’t know, what would you do?” she asks. 

“I’d hang out with him,” her mom says decidedly as she spins back around to continue cooking the chicken. 

“Yeah?” Crystal questions. 

“I mean, your dad and I were friends before we fell in love,” Crystal can hear the smile in her mom’s voice. Crystal feigns a throwing up noise, eliciting a loud laugh from her mother.  “How old are you again?”

Crystal giggles in response. “I don’t think it’s that kind of situation, mom. I don’t know.”

“Either way, honey, I don’t think it could hurt. Put your feelers out there! You might have a fun time as friends, or maybe,” she turns around again, and wiggles her eyebrows, “you’ll realize he’s Mr. Right.”

Crystal giggles and rolls her eyes at her mom. 

They continue cooking, making small talk about her mom’s day at work - she’s an elementary school teacher - or what classes Crystal hates - calculus, physics, and economics. They finish cooking around six, and her dad arrives home almost immediately after. 

“Hey dad,” Crystal smiles, greeting him with a hug. 

“Hi,” he greets her as he moves to kiss her mom on the cheek. “How was your day?”

“It was good,” Crystal responds, “What about yours?”

“Same old, same old,” he shrugs. Crystal is close with her dad - not as close as she is with her mom, but close nonetheless. He’s quiet compared to the two women he lives with, but his silence is kind and warm. 

“Crystal has a date!” her mom blurts, jokingly. 

“Mom, oh my god!” Crystal groans. She looks at her dad with an annoyed expression. “It’s not a date. We’re hanging out - as friends.”

Her dad guffaws as Crystal sticks her tongue out at her mom, and lets out a snort when her mom sticks her tongue out back at her. 

“Well, I’m hungry,” her dad claps his hands. “What’s for dinner?”

The family settles down shortly after, falling into a comfortable silence as they eat. The tacos, in Crystal’s opinion, are divine. The three of them all but shovel the food down. 

“Dinner was amazing - thank you both,” Crystal’s dad stands, clearing the plates off of the table. 

“It was all Crystal,” her mom jokes. 

“Well, I’m on dish duty tonight,” her dad says. “Great,” Crystal says. “I need to make a phone call, like right now.” It’s nearing seven thirty, and if it gets to be too late, Crystal worries GiGi will think she forgot or won’t pick up because she’s busy. 

“Calling your date, Crys?” her dad pokes fun at her affectionately. 

“Maybe I am,” she turns and walks upstairs. 

~

Crystal inhales and exhales ten times in a row, trying to calm her nerves as she paces around her crowded little room. She’s staring at the piece of paper she wrote down GiGi’s number on like it’s going to burst into flames at any given moment. She bites her bottom lip, inhales deeply once more, and picks up the phone. Her fingers clammily press into the keypad, slowly but surely. Crystal puts the phone to her ear, hearing the dial tone. The anticipation is killing her - she begins counting the seconds it takes for GiGi to answer. 

She’s terrified.

One.

What if someone else picks up?

Two.

What if this is a huge joke?

Three.

Why would she even want to hang out with me?

Four.

Let alone date me…

Five. 

Why do I want her to want this to be a date?

Six.

This is too much. 

Seven. 

“Hello?” GiGi’s voice rings through the line.

Crystal hangs up suddenly, adrenaline coursing through her veins. She curses herself silently - what was that about? She couldn’t call back now, and she definitely couldn’t count on hanging out with GiGi anymore after that move.

And then her phone rings. 

“I GOT IT!” Crystal screams, hoping her parents don’t pick up the phone before she can collect herself. She lets it ring four times, and then picks up, still pacing. 

“Hello?” 

“Hi… Crystal?” GiGi asks. 

Crystal nods her head before realizing GiGi can’t actually see her. 

“Yep! It’s me, Crystal,” she stammers. She can feel her face turning bright red. 

“How’s your night going?” GiGi asks, making small talk. 

“Oh, good. I did homework and made dinner with my mom, nothing much. How’s yours?”

“Good,” GiGi says, “I just got home from cheer practice a few minutes ago.”

An image of GiGi wearing her cheer uniform - the little skirt and tight crop top - floods her mind. Her face heats up, and she tries to push the thought away. 

“Good timing, I’m glad I didn’t call earlier” Crystal remarks. “How was cheer practice?”

“It was fun. Coach is cracking down on us pretty hard, but I guess that’s to be expected.”

The line goes silent. Crystal counts to herself again - the two remain speechless for fifteen seconds until Crystal finds her voice. 

“So, Friday? Tomorrow?” 

“What about Friday?” GiGi counters coyly. 

Crystal takes the opportunity to make a joke.“Come on. Don’t play dumb, please,” she says the pharse in the same, high-pitched voice GiGi used earlier that afternoon. 

“Very funny,” GiGi giggles. “But seriously, what about tomorrow?”

GiGi clearly wants Crystal to initiate the discussion and Crystal realizes that the cheerleader may be just as nervous as she is. 

That thought calms her - kind of. 

“Um, do you wanna hang out?” Crystal questions, her breath hitching in her throat. 

GiGi takes a moment to respond - she says yes, resoundingly - and Crystal almost audibly sighs with relief. 

“I can pick you up at five, if that works for you?” GiGi says. 

“Yeah,” Crystal replies, thankful that the blonde can’t see what Crystal is sure is a huge, dorky smile on her face, “that sounds perfect.”

“Are you a fan of sushi?” GiGi asks. 

“I’ve never had it,” Crystal admits. 

“You’ve never had sushi?!” GiGi sounds shocked. “Well, that’s that, then! We’ll get sushi.”

“I can’t wait,” Crystal tries to keep the excitement in her voice to a minimum. 

“See you tomorrow, Crystal.”

“Bye, GiGi!” 

Crystal hangs up the phone, staring down at her hands. She should not have butterflies in her stomach right now - but there they are, fluttering around anyways, making Crystal feel like a hopeless mess. 

Maybe she was infatuated with GiGi, afterall. But that didn’t make her gay or anything. She admires GiGi because she’s pretty, because she’s nice (sometimes), because she’s popular, because she has the body of a goddess… 

Crystal exhales, falling face down onto her bed. “What am I doing?” she wonders aloud to herself. 

~

Crystal thinks she’s answered her own question. It’s Friday morning and Crystal is waiting for Jackie and Jan to pick her up. She sits on her porch steps, pondering last night’s conversation with GiGi - more specifically, her feelings about said conversation. 

She’s attracted to a girl. 

She’s never even been attracted to a boy. How is that supposed to work? She feels completely and utterly lost. She doesn’t have any issues with gay people, but she admits to herself that being gay was a far-off, foreign concept; Crystal thought gay people were bad punch lines, characters in movies, lessons to learn from in church - they never actually existed.

Well, until she met Jackie. And Jan. And GiGi. 

Crystal sees Jackie’s car - a red Volkswagen - pull up into her driveway. She stands up from the porch and makes her way over, opening the back door. The sound of Ani DiFranco and Jan fill her ears - Crystal finds out quickly that Jan’s a theatre kid, so she loves singing, and that Jackie is obsessed with any and all queer female musicians. The melody of voices that she’s hearing is the result.

“Hey guys!” Crystal says, smiling. 

“Hey!” they say in unison, turning down the radio. 

“So, I hear a certain someone was given the number of one of my squad sisters?” Jan raises her eyebrows expectantly at Crystal. 

Crystal is shooting daggers into the back of Jackie’s head; she figured Jackie would tell Jan, but now she’s embarrassed. 

“Yeah…” Crystal trails off. 

“And? What happened?!” Jan exclaims. She’s excitable; Crystal would usually admire her exuberance, but right now, it’s overwhelming. 

“We’re getting sushi tonight.” 

“Oh, it’s a date-date,” Jan muses. “Jackie says you’re not into girls?”

“Um…” Crystal smacks her lips. 

“What do you mean, “um”? You told me you weren’t gay yesterday!” Jackie jumps in. 

“I don’t know… Guys, I really don’t know. This is so far out of my comfort zone,” Crystal explains, “I haven’t ever been interested in boys. I haven’t been interested in girls either, though - I guess because I didn’t think it was something I could do?” Crystal feels her stomach drop - she realizes there’s a very real possibility that she is, in fact, attracted to GiGi - that she’s not straight.

“Oh, Crystal,” Jan looks at her sympathetically, “I understand, I felt the same way when I met Jackie last year.”

“Yeah, and I felt the same way when I kissed a girl when I was ten,” Jackie half jokes. 

Crystal wishes she could be as positive about this as Jan, or as self-assured as Jackie. 

“I mean, I called her last night and hung up when she answered, and then she called back and it was like planes were taking off in my stomach. Fuck butterflies, it felt like I was going to explode for the whole conversation,” Crystal expresses her innermost thoughts to the couple, hoping for some kind of guidance. 

“I know it doesn’t help much, but we’re here,” Jan assures her. 

“It does help. It’s just weird, I think I’m going on a date - the first date I’ve ever been on - with a girl. With GiGi. It makes me nervous,” Crystal sighs. 

“That’s normal!” Jackie and Jan respond in unison. 

Crystal is suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude for the two - she’s known them both for less than five days, but she’s baring her soul and they’re being more compassionate than she would’ve ever asked for. 

“Thank you both, so much,” Crystal says. “I really appreciate it. I have no idea why this is so hard for me.”

They ride the rest of the way to school with the music blasting, and Jackie makes a joke that if Crystal is going to be gay, she’s going to have to learn the lyrics to at least three Indigo Girls songs and every single Ani DiFranco song. It makes Crystal laugh, and she hums along to the music, feeling content. 

~

The school day is a blur. Crystal steps out of the car, and Jackie and Jan both hug her, promising that she’ll be okay and telling her how much fun she’ll have with GiGi. 

Jackie and Jan kiss quickly before they part ways, and Crystal and Jackie walk to class, where GiGi is already sitting in the front row - a welcomed surprise. 

“Hey GiGi,” Crystal smiles, forcing her anxiety down. She has to pretend to be calm; she doesn’t want to scare the girl off. 

“Hi!” GiGi grins at Crystal. “Hey, Jackie.”

Jackie looks up from a book she’s already buried her nose in and looks absolutely shocked. “Oh, um hey, Gi.” 

“Crystal, I need to uh, grab your address,” GiGi hushes her voice, “for tonight.”

“Yeah, for sure,” Crystal agrees, reaching into her backpack for a piece of paper. She tears one out of her notebook, and scribbles down her address. For a split second, she considers drawing a little heart below it - her hands are faster than her thoughts, and she does it. She hands the paper over to GiGi, turning pink. 

“Thanks,” GiGi smiles, stuffing the paper into the pocket of her jacket. 

She looks amazing today - as she has every day that Crystal has seen her. She’s wearing a short, white dress, a washed out denim jacket, and a pair of strappy, light brown sandals. Her make-up is lighter than it has been before; her lips are painted a peachy pink color and she’s not wearing eyeshadow. 

Crystal is thankful she decided to wear something other than her usual plaid pants and t-shirt; she’s wearing a black mini-skirt with a tight purple t-shirt and a pair of Doc Martens. Her curly hair hangs just below her shoulders. 

Crystal can’t comprehend anything Ms. Velour says all class; she’s too busy stealing glances at GiGi and glaring at Jackie for making fun of her. 

GiGi actually says goodbye to Crystal - and Jackie - before she’s out the door this time, and Jackie tells Crystal that GiGi was looking at her all class long, too. 

Crystal blushes. 

AP English flies by, Crystal nearly falls asleep in calculus, doodles her way through physics, and zones out during economics. 

And then, the day is gone. 

Jackie drives her home, leaving Jan behind for a rehearsal. 

“Are you nervous?” Jackie asks. 

“Is that even a question?” Crystal chuckles. 

“You’ll be fine - she’s clearly pretty into you!”

“Yeah, I hope so,” Crystal remains hopeful. 

They drive in silence, and when Jackie drops Crystal off, she hugs her again, reminding her that if she needs anything at all to call her or Jan. 

Crystal nods, promising that she will. She waves at Jackie as the dark haired girl drives away, and walks up her porch. 

It’s three thirty - she has an hour and a half. 

She showers quickly, washing her hair with the shampoo that smells like lavender and honey. She dries off and stares into her closet, trying to piece together an outfit. She decides on a patterned dress - something she’d never usually elect to wear - and slips it on. It’s a cute dress; it’s mostly blue, but it’s checkered with red and black lines. The dress clings to her breasts and hips, to Crystal’s satisfaction. She decides to wear the same pair of boots she wore to school - Jackie did say that they were the gayest thing you could wear, minus a flannel. She brushes out her hair, knowing there’s no point in trying to style it - it’s thick and curly and won’t hold, no matter what she does. 

She spends the next thirty minutes on her make-up. She applies a light layer of foundation, curls her eyelashes (and puts on mascara for an extra touch), brushes on a smidge of dark blue eyeshadow, and chooses to wear a sparkly, clear-pink lipgloss. She’s satisfied with her appearance, and makes her way to her room. She writes a note to her parents, reminding them that she’s going out and will be back later. As she places the note on the kitchen counter, the doorbell rings. 

Crystal walks towards the door, and inhales shakily. 

Here goes. 

[marvinswriting]

Northshore's couples, written by anonymous, about anonymous.

a crack idea bear and I had that I took seriously

g/t mean girls

November, 12th

Ifykyk.

Hey, Northshore! Welcome to a new section of the school newspaper. I've been fighting for a gossip blog for a hot minute now, and since the paper is dying down, Northshore is finally allowing it. 

But this isn't just any gossip blog.

This is the place where I'm gonna -try- to answer your most burning questions about Northshore couples in question.

All through anonymity and observation.

To start, let's meet the students. All names have been changed so identities can stay hidden. In the tinies we've got: J, A, and R. Then in the giants there is: D, C, G, K, and S.

Who's with who? Who hates who? Who's got some secrets under the surface? Come back next week.

"Full offense to Northshore, this sounds stupid as fuck." Janis huffed, tossing down the newspaper, letting it fall to the table. 

Karen looked at the small girl of Damian's shoulder.

"Why do you think?"

"Gossip blogs are unoriginal and boring. The school newspaper is grasping at straws."

"They can be fun when done right." Regina points out. "I say we check in next week and find out more about the students it's about."

"Whats-" Cady frowned. "What's a gossip blog?"

"Aww, baby's first gossip blog! We have to keep up with this one. Just for Cady." Damian said.

Karen watched with amusement as her friends discussed gossip blogs and if they were any good.

This will be fun. 

November 19th

Love the feedback from last week guys! You're all as hyped as I am. And no. I won't confirm who your suspicions are. Stop slipping notes under the computer lab door.

This week J and D were seen together. (It's not uncommon.) 

A was seen kissing C when they thought nobody was looking. But don't be fooled, somebody is always looking.

Not to be creepy or anything.

Just- we saw that, A. 

You won't spot R without K or G anywhere near them, don't know if any of them are dating though.

Development into J and D's relationship as D is seen defending J from S. Sources couldn't hear what they were saying but it sounded pretty hostile. Is it just caring friends or something a little more? 

This blog is focused around uncovering Northshore's couples once and for all. Have any tips? There's been a box placed by the computer lab door. Got any other people you want to see covered? Let me know!

Until next week, the anon who writes about anons. Xx!

"So," Cady looked down at her newspaper. "A gossip blog, is just talking about people?"

"Hence, the gossip part." Janis folder her own tiny newspaper, tossing it onto the cafeteria table from Damian's pocket. "And it's stupid."

"I wonder who it's about?" Gretchen said. "I know everything about everybody. But all this info? This is news to me."

"It's obviously about-" Karen paused. Was she the only one to figure it out?

Wasn't she the dumb one?

"Never mind. I dunno who it's about either."

"I don't understand why you care so much." Janis huffed.

"Because its fun to be nosey about lives that aren't ours. Duh." Regina said.

November, 26th

Happy Friday, Northshore!

Wow, lots of you sent in info about J and D. Whether you've cracked the code on who they are or maybe you're just observant of two fellow students- there is no denying they're pretty affectionate.

Since we're on the topic, let's start with J and D.

Kisses. Lots of them.

Romantic, or just friends? The duo themselves give pretty mixed answers so we must take matters into our own hands and draw our own conclusions. J was seen skipping class on multiple occasions and hiding with D. I hope J has a good tutor. I could never miss that much info.

R and G are seen together. K seems like they're third-wheeling. Somebody get them out of there. K, if you need a sos, slip a note in the box bby. We've got you.

If you want to talk about PDA, look no further than A and C. Wow! A hello kiss, a kiss kiss, a GOODBYE KISS? They may not say it themselves but those two are definitely a fairytale couple.

No updates to S. #singleforlife.

Sorry, S. If you're reading this.

"Well, A and C just sound gross." Janis frowns.

"Don't be negative, Jan." Damian shakes his head at the girl on the table. "They sound cute."

"Overly cute." Cady says.

"I'm glad somebody agrees." Janis huffed.

"Poor K. Thridwheeling a couple is awful." Gretchen sympathizes.

"We don't know if R and G are dating." Aaron points out. "We don't know if any of these people are dating. I'm kinda hooked."

"Well, third-wheeling best friends is even worse." Cady sighs, glancing at Damian and Janis. 

Karen looked at the newspaper in her hands with a soft smile. She had a note to drop off.

December 3rd

Happppppy Friday! I have a big announcement right off the bat!

It is I, the writer, formally known as Anon. But now there's two of us! Me, the writer, and another student- the spy. Between the two of us (and your help from the box!) we're gonna crack these relationships open in no time!

This week's rundown!

R was with G the whole week. There was not one time they were separated. 

A, J, and R were seen in the tiny halls together where  A was overheard talking fondly about C.

Is there a fight for J?

D and S seem to never want to leave J alone.

Although, if you asked the writer, I'm totally team JD. Message for S? This isn't middle school anymore. Being mean to somebody isn't a good way to show your emotions. Message for D? You're doing fabulous, I'm rooting for you. Message for J? Pick fucking wisely. 

I'm a bit biased but my info is not. 

Don't you worry.

Until next week, you know where the box is! Xx.

"Aw, J and D sound like a cute couple." Regina cooes.

"A and C don't." Janis shook her head. "To sappy."

"Is Jan warming up to the gossip blog? And forming opinions?" Damian teased.

Karen shook her head in disbelief. The fact that her friends were yet to catch on-

-they were dense. Not idiots, just dense.

"S sounds like an asshole." Gretchen shook her head. "Bet its a boy. Yknow when a boy would pull your hair in elementary school and you'd get told, oh boys will be boys. He just likes you! Yeah. S is a dude for sure."

"Not every boy was like that. I wasn't." Damian said.

"You're gay." Janis rolled her eyes. 

December 10th

Heyo Northshore! It's the writer. Might I say, you look wonderful today? 

I don't see you but I'm sure you're just stunning.

A must be p r e t t y stupid because they were seen all this week studying with C. A kiss for every problem right? Hey, it's not a bad deal.

R was seen primarily with K this week, throwing off all previous theories.

Must have been a rough week for J. I'd imagine you've got to be stressed as hell to just break down randomly but guess what- they did. Lack of sleep? Hunger? S? Who knows what the culprit was.

But don't you worry, D was quick to whisk them off to someplace quiet.

Love to see it, I want a significant other like that.

The day they confirm their relationship is the day I expect a wedding invite.

See you next week! Xx.

"Wow! Looks like Jan isn't the only one in Northshore who needs to learn when to take a break before the break takes them." Damian deadpanned, lowing his newspaper.

Karen blinked. Are you kidding me?

"I was just tired." Janis huffed. "I needed a nap."

"I dunno man. A and C sound cheesy as fuck." Gretchen shook her head.

"They do. Now J and D though? That couple goals." Janis said.

Karen's hand shot to her mouth as she covered a laugh with a forced cough. "Couple? You think they're together?"

"For sure. They sound made to be!"

Oh dear.

December 17th

Winter break next week! Who's excited? We get full two weeks off this year and I'm so ready for a break.

I'll miss our resident couples in question though.

Not to throw everyone off but-

J spent the week with G. R spent the week with C. And A was with D?

Now granted by the time you're reading this print, this is two-week-old information- but why?

Did you get bored and just s w a p?

Anyway, I guess S wanted into the mix too? Because they took advantage of no D to try and get to J. It didn't work. G was there to protect our favorite JD ship. I'm not saying they're a cockblocker bc I don't wanna imply anything, but S is d e f i n it l y trying to get something out of J. Motive unclear but hey, we can assume :/

Gross.

Anyway, there were multiple fights that broke out that day so idk what yall were on but jesus christ calm down. Not relationship-related but be fucking nice to tineis.

Ugh.

K had no part in this swap of s/o but hey, they weren't third-wheeling anymore. 

Xx!

"Be fucking nice to tinies!" Regina cheers.

"J and G?" Janis frowned at the tiny newspaper in her hands. "Sorry, only know about J and D."

"Janis went from, ew gossip, to I'd die to have JD confirmed, real fast." Aaron pointed out.

"As she should." Gretchen pointed out. "They sound cute as fuck.

"Hands down they're lesbians." Regina said.

Karen shook her head, totally dumbfounded.

January, 7th

Did you miss me! I missed you. Mwah.

Right off the bat-

Uh. The box has been filled with messages from S saying, they do not like J. 

So I guess they're just an asshole.

Hey, just means team JD is gonna win.

Speaking of-

When J was asked directly they said that, I quote "D is the love of my life." But when asking D, I was told: "[J is] just a good friend". Sort your story idiots. The school wants to know!

While S may be out of the running, many sources say JC is a rising ship? Between A and C and J and C, I can't help but wonder, is there a behind the scenes JCA?

Fellow tiny students report A and J not being very close in the tiny hallways though. Now J and R tho-

J is just one lucky mate.

Who's your favorite? Let me know in the box! Xx.

"J and D." Janis says from her perch on Damian's shoulder. 

Karen just looked at her phone.

"You think there's a threesome going on in school?" Gretchen asked.

"Unlikely. I don't even this A and C sound cute. Why add another." Aaron rolled his eyes.

You don't think-

Karen sighed.

She really should tell them but- it was so much funnier this was.

Janis stood up on Damian's shoulder, pressing a quick kiss to his jaw without motive. 

Karen turned back to her phone, unsurprised if that would pop up in next week's article. 

January 14th

I love you- signed the writer.

Glad we got that out of the way.

NOW.

This was quite the week for our "couples".

First off, D and J? PDA through the roof.

Idk, maybe it's a special week, or maybe we're paying more attention and they've always been like that.

Those tiny kisses aren't lost on me, J. I see all.

Ugh, so cute.

A and C are-

"Skip this passage," Janis whined. "Nobody cares about them."

Everyone around the lunch table nodded as Karen began to read out loud again.

G kissed R?! R might have given a scowl but bystanders didn't miss the blush. Platonic or something more? That's the big question of this article but hey- this is a big step for all you GR shippers. Sorry to whoever wrote that long letter in the box passionately explaining how JR was peak friends to enemies to lovers. 

Shame.

#JD, anyway, you know where the box is! Xx.

"Fuck A and C. All my homies hate A and C." Janis grinned.

Cady nodded. "They're too cliche. It's annoying and I don't even know who they are."

Karen placed her head on the table with a groan.

She may not be smart, but these people were flat out idiots.

She felt a tug on her hair and looked up, resting her chin on the table.

"You okay, Karen?" Janis stood in front of her, Newspaper held at her side.

"Yeah, just dying on the inside a bit. Yknow, leaf emoji."

Janis made a face. "I don't but uh-" She leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to Karen's nose. "Don't leaf emoji. We like you here, alive on the inside."

Karen smiles. "Thanks, Janis." 

January 21st

Just when you think it's all figured out- J kisses K. 

In front of D.

At this point- they're all together. One big happy family. 

I'm still clinging onto my JD dream. 

Speaking off-

S is back. Did you miss them? Me neither.

They just grabbed J like nothing? Anyway, D was there to save the day obviously.

Our great big hero got a pretty precious nose kiss from J.  

I could make their own newspaper section about how cute they are. There is no way you can be that cute and n o t already engaged.

On another J note, if JD doesn't happen, I'd be pretty content with some CJ. C was seen giving J "a nice-sized smooch" (somebody from the box).

No development in the R and G category, just their usual cuteness.

Leave any tips in the box! You know where it is. Xx.

"Uh uh. JD over CJ." Janis shook her head.

Karen just placed the newspaper in her bag. Janis and Damian were quick to become J and D's biggest shippers. They were so good at confusing the school about their relationship status that they had themselves fooled.

Cady and Aaron, who were dating and just won't confirm it, hated C and A's relationship. Calling it cheesy and artificially sweet.

And Regina though R sounded like a bitch and G deserved somebody better.

The whole thing was just crazy. 

"I gotta go talk to a teacher this period. It was fun reading the paper together though." Karen said getting up.

There was a chorus of 'bye Karen's as she walked away.

The newspaper holder in the hallways was empty. Northshore's 'couples' was quick to catch on and save the newspaper program. 

Karen pushed the door open to the computer lab, making her way over to the tiny end.

"Hey, Glen."

Glen Coco looked up at her with a grin. "Got anything for me, spy?"

@realmisspolarbear @smallsoysauce @musicallygt

[blacksunisvalid]

Headcanon and the slippery slope

Oh boy, this post has been formulating in my head for a little bit now, and I want to say upfront I’m not the best at analysis or anything like that. This was a topic that had been on my mind for a little bit now, and I wanted to write it all out before I lost my train of thought. 

Headcanon is fun! It’s fun to fill in little gaps in your favorite work. Or even come up with silly headcanons. I don’t use silly as an insult, everyone is entitled to their own headcanon and, I love to come up with unimportant head-canons. One of my favorites right now is that Diane from SDS loves the white clover flowers since giving them as a gift means ‘ Think of me’ and I thought it was cute with everything with her memory.

Anyways, the problem with headcanon as the post is implied is how people execute and go about it. The definition for headcanon I have always used is: “ Something the show cannot, or will not prove false.’ What this means to me is that my headcanon either has to A: Comply with the lore of the show, and be plausible in the show. An example of this is my headcanon that Iroh learned to bend lightning from seeing waterbenders redirect water. Or B: Be a small or unimportant detail that the author will usually not address due to it being unimportant. See my flower headcanon above. 

So the question I have here is: When is a headcanon less of a headcanon and more of a chance to take pot-shots and character assassinate someone we don’t like, especially in regards to shipping? 

For example: I don’t ship Iceberg. But I do like it well enough. But the most common attack on it is that Neptune is a womanizer. How many fics can you think of with the basic premise of Neptune cheating on Weiss? I would guess a good portion. But when was it stated in show he cheated? He winked at girls in a crowd when he wasn’t in a romantic relationship with anyone at the time, and while he had a crush on Weiss, he didn’t promise they would date, meaning to call it cheating is....wrong I would say. But there are people who have the headcanon that Neptune is a cheater, and it’s a great way to sink the ship. 

It’s still technically a headcanon. The show never says it, but people are free to think it. And because of how Neptune is not the most important thing to the plot, this will likely not be debunked by the show. Assuming he does show up again in the show, I would hope more important things go on than a whole arc about ‘ Does Neptune cheat?’ 

But it is a headcanon made in bad faith. Most of the people with that headcanon either don’t like Neptune, or they don’t like Iceberg. And so they created a headcanon as an easy way to write it off. 

I want to say that people are free to headcanon whatever they want. But I also struggle when a headcanon is meant to tear down another character or ship, or just something you don’t like. This goes to another point I frequently make: It is okay not to ship something, or like a character. You need no reason other than that. So please just feel free to say ‘ I don’t like this ship/character’ and move on. There’s no need to try to make it toxic, or unhealthy, or debunk it. I don’t ship Freezerburn for example. But I’m not going to go out of my way to debunk the Freezerburn moments, or write an essay about how it’s unhealthy. I just see the content and move on with my day. 

I’m not going to police headcanon. That sounds so tiring, and would make me such an asshole. But I get so tired of people making bad faith arguments or trying to do character or ship assassination based on a headcanon supported by nothing. 

I’ll end this post with some of the headcanons I see a lot, made in bad faith and why they annoy me. This isn’t a call out post, just examples of what I mean. 

1. Gray is a jerk and doesn’t care about anyone, or Juvia. Expertly debunked by @mika-milano 

2. Dorothea is a man-hating lesbian who only dates men for money, which erases her canon bisexuality and ability to marry both men and women in the game 

3. Blake never liked Sun, and had a miserable time with him at the dance. It’s fine to not ship BlackSun. But just write your own fanfic instead of trying to project that on the cast. Blake had a blast at the dance. 

So my end question is this: When does a headcanon cross that slippery slope? When it stops being a headcanon and becomes a hit piece for a character?

[greengargouille]

At long last I have some time for Mother of Learning’s epilogue, which is great because I’ve been missing checking the tag but I wanted to avoid thinking too much about it before getting some rest So! What happened to our two -now former- time travellers since Zorian last fell unconscious?

-I expected either the ‘good morning’ wake up or a flashforward, but I admit I did not think of the two together. One month already, wow. Also, Zach is on friendly terms enough with Kirielle to rope her into his revenge pranks via PTSD. Neat.

(And Zorian complains about how long will Zach keep up with this, but, let’s admit it, halfway through that month Zorian probably pulled some nasty prank too in retribution, like pretending to have forgotten everything that happened within the loops. You can’t make me believe he never tried to get back at Zach) - “A dozen of people or so”, that’s... kind of a lot? I remembered that the only reason Zorian wasn’t sharing his bed with Kirielle in most restarts is because Imaya allowed her to have her own room while there wasn’t a third tenant for it. *checks previous chapters* Hmm, nope, it does say that there is a bunch of rooms on the second floor. Though I guess with the ‘slightly beyond’ capacity, some people do have to share their bedrooms.

Ah, nevermind, it does seems to be what I initially remembered. Well, one room for Imaya, one for Kael and Kana, one for Zorian and the last one for Kirielle would count as “a bunch”. But how are they sharing that between a dozen people?

(Zorian one evening just come to the Noveda Estate to get a room here, because he just can’t handle that many people under one roof and especially in his room.) (...Wait, is the Noveda Estate in good state, actually, or was it destroyed during the invasion attempt? Though I guess even if it’s mostly intact, it’s not Zach’s yet till he get a fair trial against his mentor)

-Ilsa is here! Did she sleep at the academy too? Or is she just here to watch over her students? I don’t care, I’m deciding she is sleeping here. Look, I might have never mentioned it before, but I have an incredibly soft spot at the idea of Ilsa and Imaya being girlfriends through their school years, and deciding to break up due to not being able to invest time in each other any more, but still remaining good friends. Look, I’m just a simple lesbian that like some wlw of adult age in her fantasy.

-Imaya having the time of her life aaaaaaah my heart, this epilogue only started and I already feel so blessed.

-Zorian ask where Zach is, Ilsa reply by refering to him as [Zorian’s] friend, which is... weird? He is her student too, even if she must not have seen much of him (or Zorian too, either, though he still tried to have mind magic sessions at school so maybe he was more present. Hmm. I do remember him saying to Akoja that he wouldn’t be present much though.) That would also imply that Zach is Zorian’s friend first, and eventually for his other classmates too. Hmmmmm.

...No, really, the fact that Zach was here but couldn’t wait for Zorian to wake up, wouldn’t that imply that he lives here too? Would make sense that he avoids the Estate if he is currently fighting with Tesen. Or maybe he comes to grab breakfast after whoever in charge of cooking at the Estate resigned after the invasion.

...I like the idea of Zach being part of the household, though, he must have spent enough time there through the loops to feel attached to the place. (which means that instead of Zorian going to the Noveda Estate to get at least one peaceful night, it’s Zach instead that come to crash in his room to avoid his shitty mentor outside of court meetings)

-Study groups is something I never thought about but make complete sense given how the academy is supposed to be in a bad state. Cyoria’s importance as a town will probably be massively cut despite the presence of the only rank 6 mana hole, and the academy’s management will be tough for the whole year. I wonder if, by the end of it, it will be able to go back to being the best academy of the country (continent?), or if its reputation will never recover and students will be more distributed across other academies. This could have interesting consequences, economically or politically.

-Ah, confirmation that Zorian was indeed absent from most classes this month.

-Zorian is starting to follow in Xvim’s footsteps, aww :’D

-We get to check up with Raynie, and while I don’t have much to say about it, I do like the... realism of it? The whole ‘putting this young girl with an emotional story up front to cover for other things, but ready to turn on her if it was beneficial’. We’re not left with a saccharine closure for her, but it still feels hopeful.

-Oh, Zorian is openly a mind mage. And here I thought he would really try to cover this up. Guess I will have to make major changes to that sequel fic I was never going to write in the first place

-Akoja finding motivation to become better out of the accident is... oddly sweet, in a way? Her way of explaining it is relatable. It was a terrible thing, and she knows it was terrible and feel bad for all those people, and guilty for how it turned out so well for her- but that’s not going to stop her from getting those opportunities. And she does frame it as “when war came for her again, she would be ready”, not out of altruism or wanting to protect others, which I actually really love?

-Zorian have an ‘uncanny ability to notice the problem people were having, and how to fix them’. I wonder what’s at play there. Is it his empathy/mind magic that helps him, his archmage level experience, the fact he already made training programs for multiple people in the past, or just because he is quite familiar with those people due to the time loop? Maybe all of this.

-Akoja understanding that the image she had of Zorian is flawed, but that she still likes him, is a good conclusion for her- even though the ways she notices in which he diverge from that mental picture are only due to the time loop, when even before that they already had major differences. Still a good step in the right direction.

-Akoja, Kopriva and Kael becoming buddies is nice. I like that the classmates are becoming friends even outside of the ZZ sphere of influence. (The term ‘bedfellow’ is not one I ever heard before, and I was ready to point this out as proof they all share rooms before looking at the definition. Sigh.)

-Ah, Zach is still seen as a ‘clown and a wastrel’ by his classmates, or at least Akoja. Seems obvious, as he didn’t interact much with her and need to stay low, but man, I feel like this kind of reputation could become a problem down the line. Or not. Even if he doesn’t show the full extend of his abilities, he can show enough to get some respect, for example hunting dangerous creatures.

-Kopriva thought Zorian became close to Zach for money, before learning about his sales. But not everybody have her connections. And Zorian is now a known mind mage. There’s probably one or two conspiracy theorists in Cyoria thinking that Zorian is manipulating Zach via mind magic and that’s why their relationship drastically switched.

-Hmm, if Kael is surprised someone got into his room despite the lock and ward, then it’s probably safe to say he doesn’t share it with someone else. Or another classmate, I guess he’s in the same situation with Kana that Zorian is with Kirielle.

-Some investigation ongoing! Seems like ZZ&co did a pretty good job at erasing their tracks. Zorian had probably no choice in leaving so much of the golem’s core behind, but I can’t help but think it means the end of his golem-making career, or he will have to keep it for private use- someone is going to recognise this kind of spell formula if he start producing golems interesting/effective enough to make enough sales despite being a one-man team.

-How much does the Triumverate Church knows about the summoning? Did Zorian went and erased the minds of people that were here when him and Zach first asked for an angel summon, or since it didn’t gave away anything about the loop, they were left alone? Is the fact those two were present at a not only successful summoning, but one that was hijacked by an high-rank angel, known by people higher in the Church hierarchy? Will they become unexpected allies in an eventual sequel when either of them is put in an awkward position by the crown?

-”It may take a year, or even a decade, but they were bound to make a mistake.” Flash forward a decade later, when Elayer learns the ‘saviors’ are the most powerful couple of the continent, and also are behind some of the help/money the investigation team got on other cases, and so it would be pretty bad for him to reveal the truth.

-POV switch to Damien, and we get a reminder that Zorian is basically an impostor who killed the original. Which is not something I, and probably many readers, thought much about at this point of the story, but it’s true this is a moral dilemma. Damien’s acceptance is a pretty normal reaction, though. I think. I dunno, my brother have yet to come up to me and tell me he is actually a time loop clone that killed the original, but I feel like I would be able to accept it.

-”Daimen was pretty sure his little brother would be willing to make an enemy out of the whole family for Kirielle’s sake”, except Daimen was baffled by their mother’s plans for her and wouldn’t go against Zorian, only try to smooth things over, and Fortov... wouldn’t it be hilarious if he actually supported Zorian through this plan. Zorian wouldn’t even know what to make of it since he just doesn’t care about his brother’s opinion.

-’Zorian can pull a grudge’, Daimen thinks, meanwhile Zach have been making petty pranks at Zorian for a whole month in retribution for putting him in an illusion world. The one who makes an enemy out of those two is going to have a very bad day.

-Benisek had to appear at least once in the epilogue, and with his overall contribution to the story it couldn’t have been a big part, but boy is his scene glorious. What a way to reveal some major information to people around :’)

-Spear of Resolve get to stroll openly through the city, how nice. The situation is far from being resolved for the web, and people’s perceptions probably aren’t going to shift even after getting used to them, but they are too important to strike down or ignore, and even before they already had trade relationships with some humans; a lot of possibilities are going to open for them.

-Taiven cameo! Her thriving as a combat mage and being totally independent from Zorian is a pretty satisfying end for her. Spending too much time around him would only make her discover some of his abilities and doubt her own, I’m afraid.

-The Noveda Estate is mentioned as a potential private meeting place, so it’s probably safe to assume it is not only mostly intact, and that Zach is living here/can invite people.

...Which reminds me. Didn’t Zorian have a workshop there (as seen in the chapter where he talks with Novelty and we hear about the pokeball grey hunter trap? Is the reason he asked Zach to buy a place for Kael and not for himself because he already had access to this one?

- “In all honesty, Zorian had yet to hand out even a fraction of the stuff he owed (...) It would take him literal years” This shouldn’t be surprising, given he already mentioned something similar before, but this is still something I wanted to point out, since it does align with a certain headcanon of mine on how the close future would go for him. This post is already pretty long so I won’t develop, might end up making another post about it I already said I won’t write that fic! Someone stop my brain from putting on more projects on me!

-Speaking of headcanons: Zorian is writing a book! My bet was on shaping exercises- a sort of follow up on the 15 variations basic book, putting the most interesting ones he saw during his travels, as well as less well known ones (Xvim did say there were shaping exercices for mind magic too, after all), and basically the kind of book he wished he could have during his training sessions with Xvim. But a mind magic book would actually be pretty great! If he is allowed to publish it. Not sure he can get the peer approval for it.

-Holy heck that Grey Hunter end. Well, that does answer the question of whether that primordial essence would dissolve away after Silverlake failed her contract. Man, I hadn’t expected her to actually have a part, despite joking about it.

-I expected Zach to have more of a role in the epilogue, but you know what? That just mean the unseen interactions are Free Real Estate.

This epilogue felt pretty good to read! It went in unexpected directions and managed to pull a lot of loose threads, while giving enough content to imagine an interesting sequel. I was worried till the end Zorian would date one of the girls he had interacted most with through the story, because this is the kind of disappointing ending stories tend to go for, but it really wouldn’t fit with Zorian’s character and just... the whole ethical problem of being mentally way older, having some major power imbalance and him retaining memories the other doesn’t have. Now that the story is completed I think I can go back and enjoy the passages where said girls appear more? They’re all very interesting characters in their own right, so I’m glad for that.

...I wouldn’t say I don’t want a sequel, but... I’m satisfied if Mr. Kurmaic ends the MoL-verse there (or only come back for worldbuilding posts on his blog). He did said he wanted to edit the story and eventually publish it before starting anything else, and he did want to write a completely different story, so even if he talked about a possible sequel, it wouldn’t be before years, and who knows how he will feel about the idea then. So I’m glad, I’m really glad, that the story ended so satisfying, because I feel like it’s fine for me if it’s over. I want to stay and enjoy the (very small) fandom here on tumblr, maybe contribute to it too, and I’m happy that I can do it without canon spoiling my enjoyment.

Mother of Learning will probably have a special place for me as a story. I wished it had more details on certain points, but it’s still a complete worldbuilding that felt fresh, the story had done amazingly well on Chekhov’s guns and twists, and I never felt like it went lazy or had disappointing answers to its mysteries (okay, maybe on Red Robe’s identity, but I feel that’s very forgivable). The magic system, Zorian’s progress, the time loop... so many elements that could have been badly exploited, but no, it never made characters take the idiot ball, the story didn’t pull power increase out of nowhere, it was all so good. Mostly, what I will admire the most, is that Nobody completed the story. The updates might have been constantly delayed, but it was still at a pretty good rhythm, and in a language that isn’t the maternal tongue of the author. As someone whose one-shots can stay WIP for years before I complete them... It is very inspiring.

I am so, so glad that I decided to read this story, that I was part of this adventure if only as a lurker... And I wish the best to Mr. Domagoj Kurmaic, whatever his next writing project will be- or even if he decides to stop writing at all. Sincerely, thank you.

[uncloseted]

lately i've been VERY confused about gender and sexuality (not mine, just in general, although more on that later). so i always called myself a lesbian because it made sense, im a girl i like girls. about 2 years ago i had a lot of internalized homophobia and i tried to be as feminine as i could so people would think i was straight. and i remember one time i thought "what if i'm a trans man and i'm doing this because i feel like i have something to prove". +

but then i thought "nah, i can't be a man (or non binary) i like girly things too much". but that's awful too. ellen always wears suits and has short hair and she's still a woman. jeffree star likes girly things and he's a man. but now i don't even know what IS a girl/woman. i mean i didn't choose to be a woman and i never had a chance to be anything else. but i don't think i ever wanted to be. even if i identified as "agender" and i still looked and acted the way i do know, society would still

be seeing and oppressing me as a woman, so at least to me, personally, it feels useless. but also, a lot of nb people (most of them are afab) identify as lesbians. it's very confusing. i never had any kind of dysphoria although i felt uncomfortable with my body, periods, and sex but i always thought it was because of shyness, anxiety, internalized homophobia, insecurities and beauty standards. and i have a friend who's studying psychology in university and she told me dysphoria does not exist

trans girls. i think it depends on, like, how "far" they are in their transition?. i think i could be attracted, physically and emotionally but i couldn't have sex with someone with a penis. and i know even the most trans-positive people will tell you that it's ok to have a genital preference and not want to date trans people. but it still makes me feel horrible because it's like i'm seeing nb people as "more woman" than trans women. but also in all honesty it's very hard to "tell" cis people

from nb people. if you showed me a picture of jeffree star and jonathan van ness (or elena and syd from one day at a time, or amandla stenberg and king princess, or sam smith and harry styles) and asked me which one is nb, i wouldn't know. i would probably say jeffree. so i agree that monosexual (straight/gay) people will inevitably be attracted to nbs because nb is a spectrum, and also some people (I think all of us, in some way? maybe it's a controversial opinion) are gender non-conforming but

but don't identify as nb. does that mean we should change the definitions of gay/lesbian, since any gender could have any type of body and look as feminine and/or masculine as they want? do sam smith, jvn, vander von odd/sasha velour/gigi goode (all genderfluid drag artists) have male privilege despite not being men?. should we change the words feminism, sexism, misogyny, male privilege, etc for something more accurate?. honeslty i think a lot of this confusion is actually intrusive thoughts

and me just being an overthinker in general but it's been causing me so much distress that now every pronoun feels wrong and i can't even masturbate. please forgive the rambling, the buts, the incoherence and the ignorance. thanks in advance. oh and please tell me if this comes through in pieces and i will send them again

So there’s a ton to unpack here, but for the record, I’ve had this exact train of thought, too.

I want to preface my answer by saying that I’m not a gender scholar and I haven’t read nearly as many academic works as I’d like to on this subject, so this is coming very much from my personal opinions and less from an evidence-based/academic place. I also want to say that if pressed, I would describe myself as a pansexual gender anarchist (as in, attracted to people for who they are instead of their parts and I think we should get rid of the concept of gender entirely), but I think that sounds a bit wanky, especially since it has almost zero bearing on my everyday life. So I think the concept of sexuality and gender is maybe different to me than it is to other people, and my perspective on this topic might be unusual in that sense.  If anyone reading this thinks what I’m saying is bullshit or problematic, please join in the conversation! I would love to hear what you have to say.

For me, the more I think about gender and sexuality, the more i don’t really “get” either concept. Gender has begun to feel (to me) like one of those Buzzfeed quizzes where you answer a bunch of questions and they’re like, “you’re rocky road ice cream” and you’re like, “I have no idea what that implies except for it’s the collection of traits I chose from the options above”.  

What I mean by that is that gender is a social construct. No traits are inherently masculine or feminine- things that are considered masculine in one culture can be feminine in another and vice versa. 

Especially now, when we’re really moving towards disentangling gender from our world, I wonder what’s left to take the place of those items to define what gender is.  Gender used to be like “feminine is cleaning, nurturing, creating (or Barbie dolls, dresses, and makeup), and masculine is destruction, being powerful, and being ambitious (or football, beer, and video games)”, but clearly that’s not what it means anymore. Ellen’s suits are feminine suits by virtue of the fact that she IDs as female, even though suits used to be considered a male thing.  Jeffree Star’s makeup looks are male makeup looks by virtue of the fact that he IDs as male, even though makeup used to be considered a female thing.  I’ve heard some people say that there are as many genders as there are people in the world. At that point I think we’re just using the word “gender” as a synonym for “personality”, which is fine, but I think we need to be clear about our definitions and what these words now mean and imply about a person.

Going along that train of thought, if gendered words don’t really mean anything anymore, I don’t see the point as identifying as a particular gender, at last not in the abstract.  In practice, our world still sees gender and cares about it, and other people’s interpretation of our gender has very real consequences.  As you say, even if you identified as agender, society would treat you as a woman because you present in a way society considers to be “traditionally feminine”, and as a result, you would be oppressed in the same way women are.  This is why I said that my position on gender impacts my life zero percent.  I can identify as a gender anarchist all I want, but at the end of the day I still get passed up for opportunities because the way I present is read as female.  Likewise, nonbinary people who were assigned male at birth do have a degree of male privilege (or at least, can access male privilege), depending on how well they “pass” as a man.  Sam Smith likely still experiences some male privilege, because they look (most of the time) like what society might consider traditionally male.  Someone like JVN probably passes less frequently, due to his long hair and frequent wearing of what we might think of as traditionally female clothing (skirts and dresses and high heels).  However, the flip side of that is both Sam Smith and JVN risk being even more marginalized than female identifying, female presenting people when they do dress in a gender non-conforming way, because nonbinary identities are less understood and less accepted than female identities are. 

So now that we’ve considered what gender means in relation to society, maybe let’s consider it in relation to our bodies and sexuality.  This is a bit of a minefield so I’m going to try to tread carefully, but again, feel free to call me out if I say something problematic... 

I don’t think being uncomfortable with your body, especially feminine features of your body that are widely looked down upon (for example, periods) or sexualized (physical features like boobs, butts, hips) necessarily makes a person trans or nonbinary.  As you say, those feelings can be a result of shyness, anxiety, internalized homophobia, insecurities, beauty standards, and dozens of other things.  However, it is something many trans or nonbinary individuals experience.  So the question then becomes, where are those feelings of discomfort coming from?  Are they internal to you (as in, your body physically feels like there’s something wrong/those features shouldn’t be there) or external (you feel shame for having those features because of the society you grew up in)?  It can be really hard to detangle internal influences from external ones, given that people who are assigned female at birth learn to hate our femininity and female bodies from a very young age.

I would say that if those feelings are internal to you, then that’s what referred to as gender dysphoria.  Gender dysphoria is a real, ICD and DSM diagnosable condition, and there’s some evidence to suggest that there’s a neurobiological basis for it.  My (very controversial) hypothesis is that gender dysphoria is like other body integrity identity disorders, where there’s a mismatch between the brain’s map of the body and what the physical body actually looks like.  I want to make it clear here that I don’t think being trans is a disorder.  I don’t think it’s bad or that all people who are trans have a body integrity disorder.  I don’t think you need to physically transition to be trans, or that we should pathologize gender/gender expression, or that gender is a binary (hopefully that last one is obvious).  I just think if society has less stringent gender divisions and a less binary understanding of gender, fewer people would physically transition, but some people would still experience a mismatch between their idea of how their body’s sexual characteristics should look and how they physically are.

So then, what does that mean for our terminology?  I think in the context of a world where the meaning of gender is changing, gay and lesbian just refer to genitals (people with penises attracted to people with penises and people with vaginas attracted to people with vaginas, respectively).  Or perhaps we need to separate it out further- maybe you can be romantically and physically attracted to female and male presenting people, but sexually attracted to only vaginas.  Maybe that would fill the gap between being interested in a person romantically and being interested in having sex with their genitals, where you’re attracted to someone without yet knowing what’s in their pants?  In general, though, I think labels should exist to be useful.  I don’t know how useful it is to have a term for “I'm attracted to you, given that you have the genitals I’m sexually attracted to.”

I think under that framework of centering labels like gay and lesbian on genitals, a lot more people are pansexual than would identify that way if you took a poll right now.  In general, I think a lot of people never recognize that they’re pansexual because they aren’t in contact with nonbinary or trans people that they’re attracted to frequently enough to know they don’t actually care about genital preferences.

When talking about other labels like feminism (the advocacy for AFAB and female-identifying/presenting rights), sexism (prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination, generally towards female identifying/presenting people. but also towards gender nonconforming people), misogyny (dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against AFAB and female identifying/presenting people), male privilege (the system of advantages or rights that are available to men and male identifying/presenting people solely on the basis of their sex/gender presentation), etc., I think those terms refer to the societal construct of sex/gender that is still prevalent in our culture.  We perhaps need to start using other words to describe discrimination against nonbinary people, but I think the existing terms continue to serve a purpose and it’s not time to retire them just yet.

I don’t know if any of this is at all helpful or if I’m expressing my thoughts clearly.  Maybe it will just add more confusion to your existing thought process, but I hope it helps to minimize your distress at least a little bit.  Ultimately, all of this is kind of made up, so don’t beat yourself up too much while trying to unravel all these different threads. People spend full academic careers and sometimes their entire lives trying to figure out what they believe on these issues.  It’s okay to not have it all worked out or to not be sure in your ideas.  Even for me, this is just where my thinking is right now.  Maybe in the future it will change with new information I learn or as my feelings towards myself change.  Try to let yourself think of this as a journey instead of something you have to already have figured out.

[grantwilson]

so, i have long held the belief that there are no cis/straight characters in the adventure zone. i decided that i wanted to compile some proof. if i put together everything that implies an lgbt character it would be like 3 hours long, so instead i put together everything that actually confirms it, either by directly stating or by giving a relationship with another character. put in chronological order bc that was the easiest way to figure out. here it is. enjoy.

transcript:

Griffin: I definitely fucked up in that like, the Bury Your Gays trope with the Ram and Raven, Hurley and Sloane, at the end of the Petals to the Metal arc. When I was writing it, I was like, “Oh it’s the first romance of the show, I’ll give it a tragic ending,” without knowing that there was this whole fucking, like, that’s how most gay and lesbian relationships in media end, is with tragic endings. Which I didn’t realize and so like, I’ve stepped in it a lot, in that regard.

Justin: In my mind, when I was doing the character and had Taako’s story in my head, Taako was a gay guy.

Johann: That’s like [Boyland’s] 400 kids and wives and husbands and stuff. That’s… god, that’s rough.

Griffin: I’m trying to stick with the they pronoun for Roswell, I keep fucking that up.

Griffin: One thing I want to make clear, we’re gonna learn a lot more about Lup in this session, and pretty much on through the rest of the campaign, but I  wanted to say as long as we’re talking about your backstory that the two of you are twins, and that Lup was assigned male at birth, but at a fairly young age she transitioned and identified as a female elf, and as, you know, as Lup. Which I only mention because like, talking about your backstory and having a difficult childhood or whatever, I don’t really- it’s your call, but I don’t really want that backstory to be like, you had a traumatic childhood because of your identities, because I think that would be shitty, but rather just like, it’s a tough world. Justin: I feel it was more scrappy. I feel like it was more like, “well, we’re gonna look out for each other, and that’s it.” We’re on each other’s team, and we’re looking out for each other. I don’t think it had as much to do with our identities. So we’re clear, and so I’m clear not to misgender Lup, can we make the assumption that the things we are talking about probably took place after she transitioned, so if I’m referring to Lup, as she- Griffin: Yeah. Yeah, that is her pronoun.

Taako: You’re right, there has been a terrible loss that you should know about. Justin: And I drop the camouflage spell that I’ve been maintaining. Griffin (softly): Oh, God. Taako: I just wanted to be honest. I didn’t want to catfish you or anything. [laughing and clapping] This is Taako today. I had a bad run-in while I was saving the world, again, and this is what I really look like. I just wanted you to know that, in case it changes anything, for you, personally, I thought you should know, now. Kravitz [Griffin]: [He says,] Taako, I was crazy about you, before some weird light told me a story about your 100-year journey through existence, where you were fighting for a century to save the world. [He says,] I love you, Taako, and at this point I think everyone in reality is going to love you after hearing your story, and… nothing’s gonna change that.

Griffin: The day of Carey and Killian’s wedding was full of laughing, and dancing, and feasting, and loving.

Dylan Mathis: I loved Jeremiah Blackwell. And, he loved Anne. And when they got married, do you- Mr. Ryehouse, do you know- have you ever, in a moment, been the most happy and saddest you’ve ever been, in your whole life?

Griffin: This is a question from Katya, who says, “I have a very important question to Travis about Aubrey Little: Is she a lesbian?” Travis: So, I based Aubrey on four people, right? She’s named after Aubrey Plaza, and she is pierced and tattooed like my friends Verona, Tybee, and Kate. And so, all four of those people are bisexual. So it was just kind of in my head, it wasn’t really a decision I made but as I was picturing Aubrey, and basing her off those four people, she just was bisexual. So to answer your question Katya, she is bisexual, like all four of those people.

[fandomshatelgbtqpeople]

There’s a post that’s been bothering me for literally four years. It managed to somehow be both homophobic and transphobic and the (very popular) social justice blogger who made it never got any serious blowback. I’m going to post a screencap of it here, but I won’t say who it’s from because it was four years ago. What I will say is that as far as I know, they have never addressed it or apologized despite having been asked more than once, never did anything about all the people in the notes using it as a reason to be homophobic, and that they are still a pretty popular, well regarded blog.

This post was made in response to part of an old conversation that got dragged up. It was one of those things that’s like, maybe this was okay, maybe it wasn’t, depending on the context, which I’ve never been able to find. The person who originally pulled it up was a transphobe who was talking about “biological sex,” so I don’t trust their judgment or intentions, but a broken clock is right twice a day, so it’s possible that something actually homophobic was said. I haven’t posted it here because that would just be taking it out of context again and as OP has pointed out, that isn’t helpful. Here’s the part of their response that deals with monosexuals and making assumptions about people’s gender. The rest of the post talked about why taking the comment out of context didn’t accurately represent their feelings and how the conversation had also been about biphobia and bi erasure, and that’s all fine.

It starts out fine (making assumptions about someone’s gender and anatomy based on their appearance is cissexist and we should all try not to do it), but it turns into “and I don’t do that because I’m bisexual.” Which like, you’re a cis woman so yes you fucking do. I’m nonbinary and I still do it sometimes. And then there’s that line at the end about how gay and straight people’s orientations are based on assumptions about people’s gender and anatomy. 

I’ll note that they were talking about monosexuals, which includes lesbians, gay men, and all straight people and was also read like it was directed at people who were doing it out of ignorance rather than malice, so this post was not specifically about terfs and isn’t really applicable to them at all because they know exactly what they’re doing. Terfs were also considered just as bad in 2015 as they are now, so if that comment had been about terfs, they could have said that and it would have gotten them off the hook with the people who were calling them out in good faith.

They then wrote out a longer explanation about what their current feelings were on the subject. This is broken up into two images just because it was too long to screencap at once. I haven’t removed anything. The first post and second reblog are the OP:

They later edited the post twice--once to specify that they were only talking about cis monosexuals and once to add “and sometimes also bi and pan people do this too,” which did little to address the fact that this post was literally claiming that being gay or straight was inherently problematic and that bi and pan people were automatically less transphobic by virtue of their sexual orientation and just ended up implying that it’s only okay to be gay if you’re trans (because I guess that means you’re woke enough to stop yourself from being attracted to people on sight?). Here’s 

Four years ago, I wasn’t really able to articulate a response that cut to the root of why this post bothered me so much more than any other homophobic or transphobic bullshit and to navigate around the fact that there are parts of it that I genuinely agree with (most of the stuff about anatomy), but I’m older and more practiced now, so here we go.

This post is based on a number of incorrect assumptions:

That gay people can’t find someone they’re not attracted to aesthetically pleasing to look at

That gay people are, across the board, only attracted to certain genitalia and base their sexual orientations off that

That gay people’s thoughts immediately jump to sex the first time they’re attracted to someone

That the only way to be bi is to be attracted to every gender

That gay people base their assumptions about people’s gender on whether they’re attracted to them

That still being willing to have sex with someone after finding out you were wrong about their gender makes your assumption less transphobic

They were not willing to listen to any of the gay people in their notes trying to explain to them that this isn’t actually how being gay works at all or any of the bi, pan, or trans people who called them out for being way out of their lane. The only person they responded to at all was a trans lesbian who pointed out that they hadn’t ever specified that they were only talking about cis gay people (that person also pointed out several ways in which the post was homophobic, none of which were addressed beyond “that’s not what I meant”). 

Basically, the thesis statement here is, “Gay people’s attraction is based solely around sex and genitals and none of them are attracted to trans people, but bi and pan people are attracted to everyone so we don’t make as many assumptions about people’s gender, and when we do it’s less problematic.” Which is obviously very false for multiple reasons. 

I’m going to go through all of these assumptions and talk about the underlying thought processes underpinning them and how they’re even more insidious than they seem on the surface. 

1. Gay people can’t find someone they’re not attracted to aesthetically pleasing to look at

This is actually one of the more benign assumptions and what it really comes down to is not understanding that thinking, “That person is hot” isn’t the same thing as thinking, “I would be interested in pursuing a sexual relationship with that person” (which also isn’t necessarily the same thing as thinking “I would be interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with that person” but this post completely ignores that romance might be part of being gay--we’ll get to that later). It’s really just a fundamental misunderstanding about what sexual attraction is and how it works. 

2. Gay people are, across the board, only attracted to certain genitalia 

The obvious thought process underlying this attitude is that you have to be attracted to women in some capacity to want to date and trans man and vice versa for trans women. There are two possible assumptions that could be causing this. The first is that all gay people (and all straight people) are transphobic and only care about genitalia. The second is that a trans man who hasn’t had bottom surgery isn’t really enough of a man for someone who’s only attracted to men to want to have sex with him, and the same for trans women. You’re either being homophobic or transphobic here. 

In fact, what it really reveals about OP is that, regardless of their self-righteousness on this topic, they are the one equating being attracted to women with being attracted to vaginas and being attracted to men with being attracted to penises. That’s not to say that there isn’t a transphobia problem in gay communities, but the implication here is that these are the objective definitions of being a lesbian and a gay man respectively. There are definitely cis lesbians who date trans women and cis gay men who date trans men. 

OP assigned a transphobic, incorrect definition to gay people and then based a lot of their argument on that. We see this a lot in ace discourse (”it means not wanting to fuck”) and in bi vs pan discourse (”it excludes nonbinary people”). It would be a problem if it was true, but it’s not, and while there are people who ascribe to that definition, those people wrong. There are lots cissexist bi and pan people who equate gender and genitalia until told otherwise, and it’s not less transphobic when they do it. It’s a transphobia problem, not a being gay problem.

3. Gay people’s thoughts immediately jump to sex as soon as they’re attracted to someone

So this is just blatant sexualization of gay people, and it really explains a lot of about the first two assumptions. Being gay is all about sex, so if you’re gay, you can’t possibly think someone is hot without immediately thinking about what they look like naked and how you want to have sex with them. And of course because being gay is all about what kind of sex you want to have, your attraction must be defined by the genitalia of your partners. 

It should go without saying that this is really homophobic. Even for gay aros, this isn’t how it works. I guess I can understand how if you’re equally attracted to everyone, you might not understand how gender plays a roll in attraction outside of thinking about sex, but it does, and that you don’t get it doesn’t excuse this. It just means you shouldn’t have been talking about it.

4. The only way to be bi is to be attracted to every gender

 There are a couple of assumptions that could be underlying this. The possibility that’s most charitable to OP is that they are attracted to every gender and assume that that’s the only way to be bi. This is the only option that avoids exorsexism, but it is biphobic. 

The second possibility is an assumption that nonbinary people don’t exist. Therefore, the only way to be bi is to be attracted to both men and women. This is extremely exorsexist for obvious reasons. 

The third is a little more complicated, but it’s basically an assumption that being attracted to nonbinary people doesn’t, on it’s own, make someone bi. So, a person acknowledges that nonbinary people exist but basically thinks that either, because nonbinary people span so many identities, it’s impossible to be attracted to them if you’re not attracted to everyone. So a bi woman who’s attracted to nonbinary people and women shouldn’t exist because some nonbinary people identify so close to being a man that you couldn’t be attracted to them if you weren’t attracted to men. This is where the fetishization argument that a lot of exlusionists use comes from (I’m not saying that OP is an exclusionist, this is just the underlying ideology they use), and it ignore the fact that identifying as being attracted to women and nonbinary people doesn’t mean you’re attracted to ALL women and nonbinary people. It just means you can be attracted to women and nonbinary people.

Another possible mindset underlying that assumption is that if you aren’t attracted to everyone, the nonbinary people you’re attracted to must be so close as to be indistinguishable from whatever binary gender you’re attracted to, and therefore don’t count as being a different gender. That mindset stems from not thinking aboit nonbinary genders as being as legitimate or meaningful as binary genders and from seeing nonbinary people as basically whatever binary gender you think they’re closest to (”If you’re a bi woman who is attracted to men and nonbinary people, you’re really straight because your nonbinary partner looks like/acts like/is basically a man”). This is again exorsexist for reasons that should be obvious. 

5. Gay people base their assumptions about people’s gender on whether they’re attracted to them

This is the assumption that gay people go: 

I’m attracted to this person -> They must be a man/woman

rather than

I think this person is a man/woman -> I’m attracted to them

This frames gay people’s attraction as the reason the assumption about someone else’s gender is being made, and not the fact that we were all raised in a cissexist society. It’s also lets cis bi and pan people completely off the hook cissexism. If gay people’s assumptions about other people’s gender is caused by or is somehow made worse being attracted to them, then bi and pan people should be basically immune because they’re attracted to everyone (according to OP).

The mindset underlying this assumption is that there are people that you are innately attracted to and gay people are just attempting to shape their sexual orientation around their best guess at who those people are. Therefore, everyone is... I don’t know, varying degrees of bi I guess?... and gay people (and straight people) are just the transphobes who assume they know what everyone’s gender is, while bi and pan people are enlightened enough to realize they don’t. OP claimed in the notes that they weren’t saying monosexual orientations don’t exist, but if the point your making is that monosexual orientations are based solely around an assumption that’s probably wrong, then that is what you’re saying. And they definitely didn’t correct the first reblogger, who was unequivocally saying that.

It completely ignores the probability that a person’s attraction would disappear after finding out the person’s gender was actually not compatible with their sexual orientation, or the possibility that a gay person might know someone at least well enough to have some idea of what their gender is before becoming sexual attracted to them (because, as we’ve covered, just thinking someone is hot isn’t the same as attraction, and many gay people aren’t fantasizing about sex with complete strangers). Unless we’re talking about a closeted trans person, you usually don’t have to know someone that well to know what their gender is.

Shocker: most assumptions about people’s gender are made because they “look like” one of the binary genders, have certain secondary sex characteristics, have a traditionally masculine or feminine name, use he/him or she/her pronouns, or have a certain gender marker on their driver’s license. These are all things that bi and pan people are equally susceptible to. 

6. Still being willing to have sex with someone after finding out you were wrong about their gender makes your assumption less transphobic

It super doesn’t. You still made the assumption. Framing it this way implies that transphobia is all about whether you would be willing to have sex with a trans person. I shouldn’t need to explain why that’s bad.

In conclusion

I want to mention that OP clarified that they weren’t try to say that everyone is bi in a reblog, but if that’s genuinely true then... I honestly don’t know how this post made sense to them. The point is either “people only think they’re gay or straight because they’re making assumptions about other people’s genders” OR “gay people want to have sex with strangers and that’s problematic (but it’s fine if a bi or pan person does it).” Which is a great example of someone setting a standard that requires huge changes from others but none from them and then getting self-righteous because other people don’t meet it (surprise surprise, the post I was referencing when I brought this up yesterday was from the same OP). 

Anyway, regardless of which is true, it’s wrong. This post is homophobic, transphobic, and also erases a lot of bi experiences, and I still can’t believe that so many people just let this go unchecked when it happened.

mod k

Note: I better not catch a single one of you using this post as an excuse to be biphobic.