#I’m not trying to be ungrateful I just idk | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fluffyfantasticducky · 1 month

Text

Mistakes and regrets

☆ Pairing: Loki x Reader

☆ Synopsis: Loki is a prisoner that sees his way out through pretending to date you, but when he finds true love he doesn't know how to deal with the guilt of making a very similar damage to the one that had been done to him when he was used for what originally were selfish reasons.

☆ Word Count: 10.5k, I think that's my longest fic yet, and written in the shortest time lapse, not sure what that says about my mental stability rn.

☆ Notes: As I proofread I noticed this could be interpreted as generational trauma, sort of... given I made Loki sort of mirror what Odin did to him. But I wasn't trying to be deep, I just felt like shit during the week and used this to cope. The fic might be cringy as a result, I am honestly not sure.

☆ Warnings: Depression and guilt are the focus points of this storyline. Loki starts is kinda toxic his behavior here isn't meant to be romanticized or intended to be extrapolated to real life, I just wanted to explore a narrative surrounding poor decisions and the dealing of its consequences. The reader is kinda a Mary Sue of sweetness but I just wanted to hammer in Loki feeling bad and guilty. I don't know if this is a trigger but I touch the vault scene of Loki and Odin and Odin being forgiven is also handled, Idk if that's trigger warning worthy but I know most of the fandom hates him.

“You’re not making it any for me brother.” Thor spoke through the glass.

“I want my freedom, brother.” Loki sighed, sitting down on the uncomfortable bench. “Don’t think of me as ungrateful, but as much as I appreciate not being executed, I can’t exactly call this a life.”

“Director Fury insisted, I’ve tried explaining to him that New York was a complicated situation. But he wants to be sure you are not a threat to Earth– uh, Midgard.”

“You've surely adapted well to living here” Loki rolled his eyes. “Pathetic.”

“Cooperate with me, I brother” Thor begged. “I want to help you, but I need you to help me first.”

“I’m not sure what I am expected to do from here” Loki huffed annoyed.

Thor sighed and gave his little brother a sympathetic look. Loki was frustrated, and he couldn’t blame him. He would be too if he got brainwashed, had all his anger, sense of betrayal and resentment exploited to torture an innocent planet, and still be the one to pay for said crimes… Sure he wouldn’t be all jokes and laughs.

“I’ve been negotiating a way to test your stability and get your freedom” Thor smiled hoping to cheer up his brother. And he made Loki look up. “It’d be a bit uncomfortable at first. But I know you can prove yourself. You’d have to wear cuffs or a while, but you’d be free to walk around with me and the others on trips to the city.”

“Hooray…” Loki rolled his eyes.

“Please brother, I’m trying, I just need you to be patient.” Thor spoke sadly as he made his way out. “I hate this as much as you do.”

“Do you?” Loki said. “As far as I know, you’re not the one in a crystal cell.”

“Alright, almost as much as you do.” Thor joked softly and Loki did chuckle weakly.

He agreed that Thor had been furious. But it all happened so fast.

Thor had managed to land a fatal blow on Thanos’ chest and soon Steve, Natasha, and Bruce had arrived to back him up and retrieve the Infinity gauntlet. They opened a portal to bring back Tony, Doctor Strange, and the Spider Ling… And surprisingly a weird group of space travelers.

When Thor realized they could travel to anywhere in the universe they opened a portal to rescue the Asgardian ship. There were a lot of severe wounds but surprisingly Thanos had failed, he underestimated the strength of Asgard, and most people could be saved.

“Thor!” Valkyrie screamed and rushed to hug the king.

“Valkyrie! You are alright! Thank goodness!” Thor smiled in relief and hugged his friend.

“Thor you have to come quick!” Valkyrie urged him. “It’s Loki!”

Thor’s heart sank, his heart couldn’t stand burying the only family member he had left. Thor had lost his parents… he had seen his whole planet die. But not his baby brother. Not Loki. Not again.

“Please… not now… Let’s treat the wounded ones first…” Thor spoke with a knot on his throat. “I want to focus on saving lives first.”

“Thor, you don’t get it! He’s alive!” Valkyrie scolded him. “But he’s in a critical state! We need to take him to a safe place to treat him.”

A tear streamed down the new king’s face, and he felt as if he had finally put down a enormous boulder he had been holding onto. He didn’t lose Loki.

“Take me to him!” Thor urged them.

Valkyrie took Thor to a damaged room in the ship that had been used as an improvised infirmary. In the corner laid a figure Thor knew too well being treated by healers.

“Brother!” Thor said. “Oh Gods… You’re alive…”

“You can’t get rid of me that easily thunder brain… ugh…!” Loki joked weakly as he groaned in pain. The healers begged him not to move as they tried stabilizing his condition. His neck had been nearly obliterated.

It was a miracle Loki hadn’t died and that the healers had managed to find him on time.

“We couldn’t abandon him” one of the healers spoke politely to her king. “After all, it was because of you and prince Loki that Lady Valkyrie managed to evacuate the survivors. We apologize for not finding you, my king.”

“It’s no problem at all” Thor laughed in an uncharacteristically quiet manner. He was breathless. “Thank you for saving my brother’s life.”

The lady healer let out a sheepish giggle and bowed. Loki rolled his eyes, earning a lecture from the healers that were still treating him. King or not, Thor still had that charm that seemed to make most people swoon.

The reunion was interrupted by a group of soldiers that broke in with a logo on their uniforms that made Thor’s blood boil when they pointed their weapons at Loki. SHEILD.

They picked up the stretcher where Loki was laying in and took him away to lock him up.

Apparently, the news travel fast, but SHIELD travels faster, and hearing Loki was alive was enough to mobilize and capture the injured God and lock him in a crystal prison cell in a SHIELD base. If Loki had a coin for every time that happened… he’d have two.

He couldn’t say Thor didn’t do anything about it. He could hear the thunders and enraged screams from his brother, demanding for an explanation and Loki’s immediate liberation.

“I demand my brother is released immediately!” Thor yelled.

“You should consider yourself grateful we’re allowing your witches to go and heal that world-level threat! He would be better off dead!”

“Don’t you dare speak of my brother like that! Me and all of my people would’ve died if it wasn’t for him!”

Loki wasn’t sure if he was amused or if he felt bad.

It did stroke his ego being called “Asgard’s hero” in the middle of the yelling. It shouldn’t have surprised him that Nick Fury was just as loud as Thor when angry. He couldn’t complain much. It made it much easier to hear what was going on, which was good, he was too weakened to use his magic to spy on them.

The healers tending to his neck sure seemed awkward overhearing the fight. It must have been uncomfortable to be doing your job in a high security cell. So, he tried entertaining the healers as he could. Although all he got was a lecture when his magic drained his energy, and they needed him awake to monitor him.

Soon he got better, he but wasn’t allowed to be out of his cell. It was a bit nostalgic, in some dark and twisted way. It even made him want to fix his old horned helmet, even if Thor would call him a cow for wearing it.

And when things couldn’t get worse… he met you.

“It’s lunch time” a voice said in a weirdly friendly tone before you head popped by the entrance as you balanced a tray of food on your head in an attempt to amuse Loki. He wondered if there were buffoons in Midgard, but you always tried to draw a laugh from him… Tried.

“Tough crowd, eh?”

Loki couldn’t not be baffled by the way you talked to him. Although he couldn’t decide if that was because you surely knew his reputation as Midgard’s terrorist or because you always talked in a friendly and goofy tone in a maximum-security prison in a super-secret spy agency. You also seemed to be awfully young to be here, but you couldn’t be much older than the girl Barton took as his protégée.

“What’s on the menu today?” Loki asked in a more formal tone.

“Why the hurry?” you asked, “don’t tell me you got somewhere else to be.”

“You think you are a lot funnier than you really are” Loki rolled his eyes. “And it’s not very nice to make fun of someone’s disgrace.”

“I hear you think I’m at least a little bit funny” you smiled as you kept balancing the tray of food on your head.

“Please don’t drop my food, I’d like to have at least something to eat” he rolled his eyes.

You tripped on your feet, and he saw the tray falling down, you caught it last second with your shins, and gave him a little sheepish grin.

“Alright, alright, I’m impressed” Loki groaned. “Can I eat now please? Or is having you torment me part of some attempt to break me?”

“Why are you so moody?” you asked. “More than usual, I mean.”

“I’m starving, and you humans eat way too little” Loki finally admitted. “But that is still better than nothing… Please.”

You stopped playing around and you looked at him as you got the tray into his cell.

“Sorry, I didn’t know you were eating so little.” You admitted.

“I barely have energy to cast small illusions, which would serve to entertain myself.” Loki complained as he sat to eat and you sat by the table and looked at him, you didn’t seem afraid, curious at most. You watched him eat and took his dirty plates by the end.

You weirded him out.

You always did something along the same lines; you came to bring him food, teased him a little and then left when you were gone. Although this time you had asked more questions about him. And you seemed more pensive while he ate.

And later that day he got a surprise. Usually, he just saw you to deal with you while he ate. But today you returned with a brown paper bag on your hands and a backpack, you never carried personal objects with you.

“What now?” he groaned.

You said nothing but opened the door to pass him food and slid the bag inside. Loki opened his end and grabbed the bag, it was warm, and it had a strong smell inside, he reached and pulled out a weird soft cushion with a white cover.

“Bur…ger? What this?” he asked as he read the yellow letters.

“It’s food” you smiled. “Cafeteria is closed until dinner, so I thought bringing you something else might boost your mood.”

“This looks like junk” he snarled, making you laugh.

“It’s something like that.”

Loki looked inside the bag and looked at you.

“There’s no fork.”

“You eat it with your hands” you smiled and pretended to grab a burger and bite it. “Like a sandwich.”

“What’s a sandwich?” Loki asked, making you laugh again.

Loki tried to take a bit, imitating your gesture, but you stopped with a squeaky laugh.

“Unwrap it first!” you laughed. “The white thing paper is not edible.”

Usually Loki would’ve argued more. But he had been really hungry, so he agreed.

“The taste is agreeable enough.”

“Try the fries!” you said eagerly.

“These yellow sticks?” he asked pulling out one fry from the bag, and you giggle once again, he was learning you were quite easy to amuse.

“Yes, the yellow sticks, they’re potatoes with salt and soaked in hot oil to cook them” you smiled.

“That sounds unhealthy” he said, but he surely didn’t pass up the extra meal, and while he’d never admit it, but it was tasty.

“It is on the long run” you agreed. “But you don’t eat these every day. It’s more like… something you eat when you particularly crave it. Like a treat.”

“What’s on your bag?” Loki asked, a lot more agreeable now with a full stomach.

“Ah, you said you didn’t have much to do” you said and passed him bag. “It’s a portable DVD player and old movies.”

“I understood the word portable from that whole sentence” Loki said in an obvious tone.

He wasn’t new to technology, but unlike Earth, Asgard only used technology for practical purposes like travel and fighting. Never for entertainment.

“You can watch recorded over produced plays on the screen” you said adapting to what Loki might be familiar with. “Fury said you can’t have access to internet, so I thought since I don’t use this anymore it’d keep you entertained while Thor negotiates your freedom. And if you need something else, I could surely get it for you.”

Loki was trying to process it all while he followed your instructions to set up the devices you brought him. Now he’d finally give some use to the electricity plugins on his cell.

“Why are you so nice to me?” Loki asked.

“I don’t know” you shrugged. “You seem like you could use some kindness.”

“I’m a charity case?” Loki asked, not sure if he was thankful or offended.

“You wish. If I was charitable, I would’ve brought a fancy brand of fast food, and you’re a good junkyard to bring my old stuff” you snarled, making Loki laugh, for real this time.

Your cheeks flushed and were soon surrounded in a clod of silver mist. And when it disappeared you had vanished already.

Now that… Loki didn’t see coming. He had heard of your kind when he took control of some of SHIELD agents, humans with supernatural abilities. You were a mutant, and for the looks of it, one with teleportation powers. Now it made sense why someone seemingly so ordinary was in a place like this, flirting with a prisoner.

Interesting.

The next few days you kept bringing him food as usual, but two things had changed. One, the portions were bigger now, Loki now got to eat to a point where he was satisfied. Two, you joked around a lot less, in fact, you simply brought the food and stayed nearby in silence, and Loki had caught you staring at him with rosy cheeks.

So, you did fancy him… Truly interesting. And quite flattering too, he at least had to agree you were quite appealing to stare at.

“I watched one of your… Dee Bee Dees…” Loki started the conversation while he ate. “The one with the funny doctor…”

“That… doesn’t narrow it down much” you finally spoke. “Sarcastic asshole with a wounded leg?”

“He is sarcastic, but he treats patients with joy and laughter and goes against the rules. Like the pair of legs at the entrance” Loki specified. “It was a sweet story… I did feel bad for him when he lost his… you know.”

“Ah, yeah…” you said sadly.

For a few more days, the routine kept like that, you seemed a lot shyer than before and now Loki was the one pursuing your attention and with an arsenal of movies you had watched he always had a way to start conversation.

When he was sure he had properly understood your interest in him, he made his move.

While Loki wasn’t as flashy as Thor, he never had much trouble swooning anyone of his interest, with years of etiquette lessons and nourishing his mind with the most exquisite novels and books Asgard had to offer he knew how to charm anyone he desired.

And soon enough he was courting you. He recited for you the collection of the most exquisite verses he had memorized and casted his illusions of roses and butterflies for you to enjoy a romantic set up.

Soon Fury had two people demanding for his liberation. And since Loki had been in his best behavior Fury didn’t have an excuse to keep Loki locked up and while he had a tracker on his ankle and Asgardian magic bracelets capable of suppressing his magic.

You were there when they let Loki out and he made sure to hug you first. The more in love he seemed, the sooner he’d be truly free. You melted against his embrace and wrapped your arms around him in a warm hug.

Loki felt a light tug on his chest. He couldn’t remember the last time someone out of his parents and Thor been so eager and happy to hug him.

“I had been dreaming of this…” you spoke softly. “And your hugs are even cozier than I imagined.”

That felt like a dagger to his heart. Why were you so sweet?

“Alright, Bambi, if you try something your little sweetheart will let us know right away, got it?” Tony warned him.

You wrapped your arms around Loki’s bicep pressing yourself against him.

“He’s gonna be perfect” you defended him. “And if I’m wrong you can lock me up as well for helping a criminal out.”

Second dagger. What kind of idiot were you trusting him so blindly? Could you really not see he just wanted his freedom?

Loki finally had a proper room, or something like that. He would be staying in the Avengers Compound when the Helicarrier landed… until then there was a room where he, Thor, and basically everyone stayed.

Your bed the one right above Loki’s. Loki sighed. Just a few more days. Loki laid down and saw you looking down at him, peeking from your bed with big sparkling eyes.

“Yes?” Loki said in his best sweet loving tone.

“S-Sorry…” you mumbled as your cheeks got red. “I’m just really happy you’re here.”

“Aww, young love…” Kate cooed.

“SHUT UP! I’M OLDER THAN YOU!” you screeched and threw a pillow right at her face, making Loki smiled softly.

“You’re both babies…” Yelena grinned.

“Shut up, you hag!” you and Kate argued.

“You’re all babies…” Bucky corrected.

“DON’T STICK YOUR NOSE, YOU FOSSIL!” the three of you argued.

“I’m… not gonna join this argument being 1,500 years old” Thor laughed and soon eased the mood in all laughter again.

Meanwhile Loki wouldn’t stop thinking what you said to him. “I’m happy you’re here.” Third stab… How could you be so happy and attached to him so easily and quickly?

The next few days he had resigned to adapt to train with you. He had been a warrior all his life, but being a soldier was too boring for him. It was a lot of training, gym workouts, more training, and meetings. He saw you nodding off during the latter. Where did you pull the energy to play and joke around with him when you went to bring food to him while he had been locked up?

You yawned and rested against his shoulder as you dozed off during lunch once. You were so warm and trusted him more than he deserved. You seemed awfully comfortable around him.

Every spare moment you had was dedicated to him, you were awfully cuddly and touchy. Loki wasn’t used to this in the slightest. At first playing along seemed impossible. But your kisses were so gentle and tender, more often than not he found his eyes fluttering close and his hands wrapping around your waist in a loving way. Even sharing a room with a lot of people seemed more fun if he got to study your reactions.

“Take that!” you screamed as you and Kate smacked each other with pillows, but when a stray pillow hit Natasha in the back of the head, it was war.

Everyone was throwing and hitting each other with pillows until someone pushed you to Loki’s arms who had stayed out of the war as just a bystander. No one seemed to be paying much attention to him, but now you were.

Your face was beet red, and you were blabbering apologies if you had hurt him, (which, you hadn’t). But Loki simply smiled and grabbed your sides and started squeezing them, causing you to squeal and burst out laughing.

Oh, of course you were ticklish, he should’ve known. Hel, you irradiated this aura that just screamed “tickle me!” And as the God of Mischief, he was drawn to ticklish little things such as yourself, to make sure he could exploit every ticklish little inch of your giggly body. It had always been a pretty harmless way to ease his need to cause mayhem.

Soon the entire room was in fits of laughter since Loki had unintentionally inspired a tickle war.

“H-Hohohohoney! Pleahahahahase!” you begged Loki, “thahahahahat tickles!”

“So? I hope it doesn’t bother you, my dear” Loki purred in your ear as his fingers traveled up and down your ribs, causing you to screech. “I think I’d like to play with my pretty little toy some more…”

“Nohohohoho! Please! Hehehehehe! S-Stop it!” you giggled until you had proofed to reappear at the top bunk bed, right by the time someone else had surrendered and called truce.

Thor. His stomach was sore from laughing and he needed a break. But the big Asgardian was confident enough to not be affected by being the one to surrender in such harmless play fight.

“I’m nostalgic” Thor laughed. “Reminds me of the sleep overs with Fandral, Volstagg, Hogun and Sif.”

“I wouldn’t know, I was never invited.” Loki said.

“WHAT?!” you gasped and threw a pillow at Thor’s head in Loki’s defense. “JERK! TO YOUR OWN BROTHER!”

“What do you mean?” Thor asked. “You rejected us every time.”

“What are you talking about? You never invited me, brother” Loki explained. “By the time I had found out, you were all locked in your chambers.”

“Sif and the guys always said you said no” Thor said. “That’s why I always made smaller sleepovers with just you and me. I thought you hated big groups.”

Loki never thought Thor had been clueless, if anything he thought it had been him who rejected him, it never occurred to him it was the rest that orchestrated Loki’s exclusion. It made sense in retrospect, they were more Thor’s friends, not Loki’s.

“I enjoy time to myself,” Loki agreed. “But I’ve never been against big events. I always thought it was you who didn’t want me near your friends…”

“Of course not, brother…”

“Don’t feel bad, Loki” Yelena said in a tone that eased the mood. “Nat used to have sleepover with friends and ban me from her room the whole night. But we’re sisters, adopted or not.”

“I said I was sorry, and I was 11 you resentful crybaby!” Natasha argued with a laugh.

You noticed that had hit a sensitive spot-on Loki and went to sit behind Loki to give him a hug from behind. And it was unexpectedly comforting, he sighed as you kissed his cheek. Growing more and more used to your doting affection, you were also rather good to read his mood by now.

It just made him feel more guilty, so he tried changing the subject.

“You poof around when tickled, hm?” Loki chuckled. “Noted.”

“Not just when I’m tickled, when I get worked up by almost anything…” you explained. “I can’t always control it.”

“I see… so, I get you all worked up…” Loki flirted, making you jolt and squeak with a red face. “Heh… I’m flattered.”

“What about you?” you asked when you calmed down, resting your chin on his shoulder. “Does something like that happen to you?”

“Mmm… my magic is also very tied to my feelings is mostly surges of magic when I’m pissed off.” Loki shrugged. “In a way, the source of my magic abilities come from my control of how I feel. Which is why Thor could never learn sorcery… he couldn’t ever keep calm and focus enough.”

It felt a bit of a cheap answer, his guilt told him you were always vulnerable with him. There was another thing…

Alright, now that no one was paying attention to you two.

“When I was little, I used to have a lot of nightmares, and my mother stayed with me and taught me this spell… it allows you to invite someone else to your dreams, to put it simply. She taught me that spell to help me with the bad dreams… And sometimes I still cast it involuntarily while I sleep. It’s… what’s the word? Automatic, at this point.”

“You haven’t used it since we met” you pointed out.

“There’s these preventing that” Loki wiggled the magic cuffs on his wrists, and you shrank sheepishly. “Maybe one day I’ll have you sleep visiting… who knows…”

You smiled too eagerly at the idea… it was painful to see the adoration in your eyes.

The next night you were chatting happily, you laid on the floor with your feet hanging on Loki’s bed. Surprisingly he didn’t mind too much, he found himself much more engaged on the conversation. He simply rested his hand on your shin, caressing it with his thumb.

But at some point during the chat his hand brushed by your ankle, something that should’ve caught his attention way sooner. A location tracker like his. He brushed his fingers along the band, and you jolted, quickly making a bad excuse before rushing out. A terrible liar dating the god of lies. How ironic.

“I didn’t know… I thought I was the only one with one of these…” Loki pointed to his tracker.

“All mutants and non-SHIELD affiliated have one” Tony explained with a yawn. “Basically, if you have superpowers, you have two options, be an agent or an avenger.”

“Or locked up” Loki concluded, and the way no one answered, confirming his suspicion.

“You’re gonna be joining us, right, brother?” Thor smiled.

“Do I have a choice?”

Loki chuckled, he had been thinking about this prior to this information, the fear of actually losing his brother when Thor was ready to leave him forever in Sakaar had been too great.

But what about you? You didn’t strike him the superhero style, a were a fragile and sensitive little thing, and he couldn’t picture you in the battlefield, but being a soldier was clearly taking a huge toll on you. You seemed perpetually exhausted living like this.

“Has my darling decided yet?” Loki asked, he didn’t plan on the pet names, but it felt weirdly natural as it rolled off his tongue. It felt right.

“Not before meeting you, we had tried, but I’d say with you two together… things have changed for the better.” Steve assured him. “It’s a relief though, you two would be great assets in the future, and the life at the compound is bit freer and more independent.”

For some reason, Loki smiled at the sound of that.

“It’s gonna be for the best” Bruce smiled. “Fury can be quite severe, and the soldier life isn’t for everyone…”

Loki couldn’t see you long term here, you’d be overworking yourself for a lifestyle too demanding and that you didn’t even like. It would be for the best to be an Avenger… at least that’d give you some more freedom.

By then, the mood had died down and everyone went to bed, turning off the lights way before you arrived. A few more minutes passed… and nothing. Loki considered going to find you when you opened the door, guiding your way with your phone’s flashlight. You had a messy damp ponytail, and baggy pajamas. You arrived and sat by Loki’s bed and immediately collapsed right beside him, invading his bed. He was ready to climb and use yours when you he felt a tug on his shirt.

“Let me stay with you…” you mumbled with your eyes closed, it seemed you still had some consciousness.

Loki nodded and laid down beside you, wrapping his arm over you, and tucking you under the bedsheets. He had to keep appearances. Yeah… Of course.

He studied you for a while. Your hair was soft, and it smelled like wild berries, shampoo he had started using as well because it smelled so nice. Your skin was soft and smooth, it was addictive to trace his fingers along your body. He traced circles along your side.

“Nooo… thahahat tickles…” you giggled and shifted in your half-asleep state, making something stir within Loki. “You can tickle me all you want in the morning, okay baby…?”

“Ohoho! Is that so?” Loki chuckled. “That’s dangerous thing to offer to the God of Mischief don’t you think?”

“’s okay… I trust you…” you yawned snuggling against his chest.

“Y-You do…?”

“You’d never do anything to hurt me…” you assured him, even with your brain fighting with all it’s might to not succumb to exhaustion.

Once his eyes adapted to the darkness, he stared at your face. Your features were gentle, with a pureness that only a heart that hadn’t been corrupted with cruelness and malice would have. It made him feel weak.

“I love you” you mumbled, kissing his lips before finally falling asleep with the most peaceful smile he had ever seen on anyone that was this close to him.

“I… I love you too…” he whispered and kissed the top of your head.

Now Loki genuinely wanted to stab himself through the chest, he deserved nothing less.

The next morning was the last time he’d be in the Helicarrier for a long time if he could help it. Both of you got the trackers removed and he was officially free. The magic cuffs were taken off of Loki and he immediately summoned a huge illusion that had a radius of a few kilometers as he stretched and showed off.

A huge double rainbow, oh how he had missed using his magic like this. He noticed your eyes sparkling in admiration.

Thor helped him unpack and you two were assigned neighbor bedrooms so the lovey dovey couple could stay close. You seemed ecstatic, you set your room and invited him to see it.

It was very much what he expected from you. Cozy and cute, just being inside made him want to lay down on your bed and sleep. And of course you had a pile of stuffed animals. He laid back on your bed, sinking in the mattress and fluffy covers.

Adorable.

“Honey bunny, I’m gonna go to the city alone today… don’t follow me” you warned him and proofed away before reappearing for a second. “And don’t snoop around my stuff! Love ya!”

And you disappeared in a gust of silvery white mist. Loki napped on your bed for a while, but… he couldn’t resist, he was curious by nature. He walked by your desk and saw the mirror of had a bunch of photos of him stuck to the board, he wasn’t smiling in any of them, and most had been taken him by surprise. Loki would’ve thought it weird, but the two of you were dating. And you only did what was normal for someone in a relationship. He smiled softly at how purely infatuated you were.

“Loki!” you called for him, so you had returned. He went to find you.

You had smiled so brightly as you jumped to his arms and showered his face in loving smooches.

“I missed you!” you smiled between kisses.

“You just left an hour or so…” he chuckled.

“It’s still too much time away from you!” you snuggled with him. “I missed this pretty face.”

“Heh…” he chuckled.

“I bought us something.” You smiled and handed him a golden bracelet with a round item on the middle. You kept the silver one. “It’s a distance touch bracelet.”

You touched your bracelet, and he felt his buzzing. Oh. He knew this couldn’t have been cheap. And you still didn’t hesitate to get it for him.

“Now you can feel me close, even if I vanish, or if we can’t be with each other.” You giggled.

His heart fluttered. How could there be someone so overly sweet? To him, of all people.

“Thank you…” he smiled.

Days passed and Loki’s sanity was evaporating in thin air. Guilt was eating him alive.

You were in truly, madly, and hopelessly in love with him. You wanted nothing but the best for him and you always showered him with love, affection and the sweetest kisses he had ever tasted. And worst of it all, he was falling in love with you. He deserved no love from you, but he had it… And it filled his heart with a warmth he didn’t deserve. Oh, you poor lovely thing, if you only knew how cruel his intentions had been to start your relationship.

He did what you wanted now, trying to make up for it. He didn’t want you to feel like you did all the job in a relationship anymore. Soon the photos were more couple y, of kisses and hugs, Loki took photos of you more as well. He invited you to read and nap with him.

He tickled you lots, and making you giggle in his arms as he held you close. He hugged you tight, trying to squeeze in all the love he had develop for the kind soul that had been nothing but sweet to him. In a wordless pray for your forgiveness.

He did everything that occurred to him would make you happy.

“No way! You’re ticklish?!” you gasped with an ear-to-ear grin.

“Terribly so, I can’t stand being ticked in between my ribs” he smiled as he rested his chin on your head, with you sitting on his lap. “My magic acts up on its own if I get overwhelmed, like you.”

“Really?” you giggled and caressed his sides. “Can I try?”

“For a kiss…” he smiled and puckered his lips for a smooch, which you complied with a huge grin. “I adore you… Fine, you got one minute to tickle my ribs.”

“Just one minute?” you whined with that lovely smile of yours.

“Thirty seconds?” he smiled.

“Eh?!” you whined. “One minute!”

“See how convincing I am?” he grinned.

“Oh, you—” you said and turned around to start poking and prodding his ribs, Loki couldn’t help but burst out laughing.

“Ack! Hehehehe!” he whined, you were too good at this, he was laughing his heart out. “S-Stohohohop! Hehehehe! I-It’s been a minute! Hahaha! S-Stop!”

“I’m not done with you, you pretty tease!” you giggled and kept prodding between his ribs.

“Oh yeheheah?!” he laughed and skittered his fingers along your belly.

You were squealing and giggling in the blink of an eye. But you didn’t stop tickling him.

“Hehehehe! Hic! G-Give up!” you giggled and squirmed as you prodded his sides.

“You give up! Hahahahaha!” he giggled squeezed your tummy and skittered his fingers along your armpits.

“Ack! Noohohohoho!” you whine and squeezed above his kneecaps, making him jump and ergo you fell off his lap and onto the couch.

“You’re in trouble…” he grinned and his fingers, poked, drilled, kneaded and scratch over every sensitive spot on your body, and it didn’t matter if you gave up. He didn’t stop until you were breathless.

Only then he stopped and held you in his arms.

“Remind me to not tickle you again, you’re sadistic” you smiled.

“You know it, darling…” he smiled and kissed the top of your head. “Did you have fun?”

“Mhm…” you smiled and leaned against him. “I love you.”

You were beyond ecstatic. You melted under all of his affection and more time he spent with you, the more he couldn’t deny his feelings for you.

He did it everything he could to make you happy. But nothing he did alleviated his guilt. He could only imagine the amount of heartache you would feel if you found out he had only used you to try looking better adjusted and be free, and that he had pretended to fall in love.

He couldn’t eat, he couldn’t sleep. He was going insane. He walked around the compound like a ghost during the night. He did a stop to throw up in the toilet.

“You’re awake,” you surprised him despite your gentle tone. “Is something bothering you?”

“N-No, love. I just wasn’t feeling very tired.” He assured you. “Don’t worry. Go back to sleep.”

You placed your hands on his hips and leaned closer to him the way you did whenever you were going to kiss him. But you took a little sniff—probably smelling his bad breath—you stopped and smiled at him with kindness.

“Mmm… Insomnia, hm?” you smiled and pulled him to the kitchen. “I know just the cure.”

You heated up water and prepared him a tea with honey. The warmth of the drink ran through him as the sweet drink got rid of the bad taste, and he sighed a tear streaming down his face.

“What’s wrong?” you asked, cupping his face.

“I’ve done so many awful things… And…” he spoke softly. “I don’t know how to fix them… I don’t deserve any forgiveness…”

“Oh Loki…” you hugged him. “No one blames you… you didn’t mean it… I’ve seen your pretty heart, and you deserve all the love in the world… Gosh, if I could take all the pain, you’re feeling for myself, I would.”

“Please don’t say that…” he begged. He couldn’t handle anymore guilt, but he didn’t know how to tell you the truth.

You gently guided him to your bedroom and tucked him in your bed, wrapping your arms around him in a protective way.

“Forgive me love... Please forgive me…” he begged between mutters. “I take it all back… please… Please don’t hate me… please…”

“Shh…” you whispered, running your fingers through his hair. “It’s all gonna be okay… I’m always gonna be here for you.”

Between the warm tea, his exhaustion, the previous sleepless nights, your comfortable bed, and your loving touch… his body gave up on him and he fell asleep.

Everything was dark, and cold, covered in ice and a cruel wind. Loki had a good tolerance to cold, but he was freezing.

“Monster…” a voice echoed so loudly it made Loki’s ears ring. It was his own voice and it came from everywhere around him.

“Traitorous rat…”

“Murderer…”

“Beast…”

“Liar…”

“Frost giant…”

“Monster…”

“Manipulator…”

“Liar…”

“We finally had someone’s trust…”

“Of course, you just play around with others!”

Loki was completely surrounded by copies of himself, all at least twice his size, blue skin, Jotun attire, and eyes red like blood. True frost giants.

Loki simply took every blow and insult. He deserved them.

“Loki…?” a different voice called. “Is this what you meant by inviting someone to your dreams?”

No please… you couldn’t be here.

“Darling… wake up… please don’t be here…” Loki begged you. “Please…”

“I’m not leaving you here on your own…” you spoke and kneeled beside him.

Loki felt his body change, every muscle vanished leaving him as practically skin and bones. Small. Weak.

“Loki… what’s going on?! What’s happening to you?!”

Loki tried to shapeshift back to his natural look, but he had no control of his own body. At this point in life, he should be desensitized to nightmares where his magic didn’t obey him… but…

“Please… leave me here…” he spoke as he could, but he could barely hear himself.

“Don’t say that... What’s… what can I do for you?”

There was something about dreams, and especially Loki’s dreams, that always seemed to be extra dramatic. It must have been so confusing to be in one as an outsider.

Loki’s body changed again, he grew twice his usual size, and his body was blue and muscled. Exactly the body of a Jotun.

“STOP BEING SO GOOD TO ME! CAN’T YOU SEE I DON’T LOVE YOU?!”

“What?!”

What?! No! That wasn’t true…

Loki tried to take it back, but he was in autopilot. He was in the passenger seat of his own mind.

“I DON’T LOVE YOU! ARE YOU THAT GULLIBE TO THINK I’D FALL IN LOVE WITH A MORTAL?! I HAVE BEEN USING YOU!”

“No… no, you're not… You wouldn’t…”

“I JUST NEEDED A COVER, TO SEEM WELL ADJUSTED ENOUGH TO NOT BE A PRISONER! AND YOU WERE ANNOYING ENOUGH TO BARGE IN DEFENSE OF ME! I’V BEEN PLAYING WITH YOU FROM DAY ONE! DON’T YOU SEE YOU ARE JUST A TOY?! YOU’RE PATHETIC!”

The look on your face was heartbreaking. You looked crushed.

“I HAVE BEEN THINKING OF A WAY TO GET RID OF YOU! I CAN’T SLEEP AND I WANT TO THROW UP THINKING I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH YOU YET ANOTHER DAY!”

You curled up on the floor and Loki lifted you but your collar’s shirt.

“GET IT INSIDE YOUR HEAD! I COULD NEVER LOVE A MORTAL AS UNNERVING AS YOU!” Loki screamed at you before slamming you against the floor.

“NO!” Loki sat up with a gasp and his body drenched in sweat. He looked around and saw you curled up on the bed, your back facing him. “Love?! Thank goodness… I’m so— Love, w-what’s wrong…?”

You were stiff and you had a hand on the back of your head. Loki shifted and stretched a bit and saw your face. Your eyes were full of tears, yet he had never seen you with such a cold expression in your face.

“My love… and what’s wrong?” Loki placed a hand over your arm, and you slapped it.

“Why did you say that?” you asked him.

“I d-don’t know… I wasn’t… I didn’t…” Loki stuttered. “My dreams are like that…”

“No. I mean, what you said was really specific. Why…?”

“I don’t—I don’t know why I—”

“Tell me the truth, Loki.” You ordered him. “Did you, or did you not pretend to love me for your freedom?”

Loki stayed quiet. He didn’t have the courage to tell you the truth, but he didn’t have the heart to keep lying to you. With that confirmation tears started falling down your cheeks again.

“Y-Yes but I—that was before…”

“Get out…” you spoke.

“What? No, darling, listen… I…”

“I don’t want to hear you.”

“Please love… let me explain…” he tried holding you.

That made you snap. You started hitting him, being a human it was impossible for you to harm him, but not once in his life had he felt more pain.

“DON’T TOUCH ME! DON’T TALK TO ME!”

“Darling please…”

“I DON’T WANNA SEE YOU EVER AGAIN! GET OUT OF MY ROOM AND GET OUT OF MY LIFE!”

He had no strength to fight you, he was defenseless as you kicked him out of your room, slamming the door on his face.

There were a few faces popping out of their door to try seeing what had happened and that quickly retreated back to their rooms. Loki had no choice but to go inside of his own bedroom.

The next morning, he nearly tripped on his way out with a box by is door. It was full of books, quills, a coat, photos of you together. And… the silver bracelet that matched his own. It tore his heart to shreds. He didn’t feel as guilty anymore. But remorse and the memory of how brokenhearted you looked was even more sadistic. He heard you crying often from across the wall.

A few days later the others started giving him dirty looks. Knowing you and considering that this didn’t happen right away he assumed they had found out after heavy interrogation and now everyone knew he had used you. Even Thor seemed upset, not angry, but he had this… disappointment in his eyes.

“I hate dealing with moving companies” Tony sighed as they all sat for dinner. “But Fury wants to have our little Houdini enlisted by the end of the week. It’s a shame… The kiddos enjoyed being around each other.”

“Tell me about it” Clint sighed. “Kate is devastated.”

“Speaking of devastated…” Natasha said as she stood up, and Loki would’ve sworn she was shooting daggers at him with that glare. “See if I can be more convincing about eating something, otherwise Fury will have a corpse enlisting.”

You were moving out? To become a SHIELD agent? But you hated being a soldier. Had he hurt you so bad that you preferred that lifestyle and ruin your life forever… than being around him?

This all felt awfully familiar. Loki excused himself and went to his room and lock himself inside. He closed his eyes, and part of him wished that they’d never open again.

“Am I cursed?” Loki asked, choked up by the last bit of hope.

“No.” Odin responded the worst thing he could've said him. A curse would've been better.

Loki placed the casket down, weakly, it suddenly felt like a very... very heavy thing to carry. And the weight stayed there, right on his chest even after the casket had been placed back at the pedestal.

“Then what am I?” Loki asked softly, afraid of the answer.

“You're my son.” Odin answered, and Loki doubted his own magic since he couldn't detect dishonesty in his father's words.

Clearly that was a lie. So why didn’t his magic detect that? Loki felt rage spiral out of control like a boiling pot.

“What more than that?” Loki growled, still trying to keep his composure as he walked towards his father that was by the stairs at the other side of the corridor. “The Casket wasn't the only thing you took from Jotunheim that day, was it?”

Odin looked him in the eye. Unable to deny it any longer. It had been to many years with that secret. As Loki walked closer, Odin just started at him in silence as Loki reached the stairs.

“No.” Odin finally said. “In the aftermath of the battle, I went into the Temple, and I found a baby. Small for a giant's offspring— abandoned, suffering, left to die. Laufey's son.”

That felt like a dagger piercing the young prince’s heart. Out of all the things he was insecure about, it turned out he WAS an outsider. Out of all the things he could’ve been, he HAD to be a Jotun, a monster. Out of all the Jotun’s in existence, he was the son of the worst of them all. And out of all the reasons he could’ve been adopted for, was because even his own biological family didn’t want him… and his adopted family never told him any of this.

“Laufey's son...?” Loki finally managed to gasp out, he was choking up on his own tears. “Why? You were knee-deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me?”

“You were an innocent child.” Odin said, sounding more exhausted by the second.

“No!” Loki begged his father, knowing that Odin was a strategic warrior. There was always a meaning behind his actions. “You took me for a purpose, what was it?”

But Odin didn’t answer. The physical toll of delaying his Odin sleep to prepare Thor to rule, preventing a war, the emotional toll of having to banish Thor and now… having his youngest child doubt his love for him because of his foolish decision of not telling him the truth earlier were overwhelming him.

The All-King saw with pain how the little child that once smiled at him with love when he picked him in his arms after the battle now saw him with fear, pain, and resentment.

“TELL ME!” Loki demanded loudly, no longer capable of remaining calm.

“I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace... through you.” Odin confessed.

That was the final blow to Loki’s poor heart.

“What…?”

A tool. All he had been adopted for was as an instrument of peace between Asgard and a race that everyone saw as blood-thirsty monsters.

“But those plans no longer matter.” Odin clarified.

“So, I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up… here, until you might have use of me.” Loki inquired in pain.

“Why do you twist my words?” Odin asked softly.

“You could have told me what I was from the beginning.” Loki urged, desperate to makes sense of what easily was the worst day of his life. “Why didn't you?!”

“You are my son. I wanted only to protect you from the truth.” Odin said softly, in a fruitless attempt to calm his poor child’s heart.

“Wh— B-Because I-I-I am the monster parents tell their children about at night?!” Loki asked, flooded by all the scary stories about the frost giants growing up. All those times he and Thor played heroes as kids fighting those monsters.

“Don't...” Odin begged as his strength slowly abandoned him.

But Loki couldn’t listen anymore. The grief was too great, and the feeling of betrayal didn’t allow him to trust Odin anymore.

“It all makes sense now! Why you favored Thor all these years.” Loki yelled as he started walking up the stairs to yell at Odin as the All-Father slowly lost his strength and started passing out on the stairs. “Because no matter how much you claim to “love” me, you could never have a Frost Giant sitting on the Throne of Asgard!”

Odin kept trying until his last second of consciousness to beg his son for help, forgiveness… anything. But he had been too weakened to dedicate his young boy some kind of love or reassurance as he fell prey to the Odin sleep, he had delaying for so long.

Now Loki encountered a similar dilemma. He had been stupid, dishonest, and selfish to someone who offered him nothing but unconditional love. He betrayed your trust and there was no way now that Loki could prove that despite his original intentions his love wasn’t any less real.

He laid down on his bed, with his arm draped dramatically over his eyes.

“Troubled, my son?” a voice spoke making Loki sit up.

“Father” Loki smiled softly. “I ruined it. I had the most beautiful love in my life… and I was stupid and lost it because of my own selfishness.”

“That sounds familiar” Odin chuckled. “You truly are my son, after all.”

“You had always been will always be my father…” Loki said the words he had denied for several years. “I never understand your reasons. Cruel as they were…”

“Not holding back against your old father, hm?” Odin laughed.

“Sorry…” Loki smiled softly.

“My original reasons were foolish, selfish, and even cruel as you rightfully… but I always hoped to do what would be best for the 9 Realms” he spoke. “But that didn’t mean the love I had for you wasn’t any less real. You are my son, regardless of the kind of blood that coursed through your veins.”

Loki smiled softly; it was weird. He knew Odin would have never say all that. But now, after growing up so much, he understood it wasn’t because he didn’t feel it, he had always been too proud and formal, too much of a king. And while imperfect, it was still his father.

“That’s why you never caught me lying when I called you my son or said that I loved you.” Odin spoke. “In my heart, you’ve always been my son.”

“I know, father” Loki smiled. “I’m sorry it took me so long to understand it.”

“I’m sorry I never told you before… I feared you wouldn’t take it well…”

“Me? I would never” Loki joked softly.

“We always loved you as our own” a female voice added making Loki turned around.

“Mother.” Loki spoke breathless. “I know… I know… I knew, I was just too scared I could’ve been wrong, and you didn’t…”

“You were too much of a charming kid not to love you” Frigga said compassionately. “Your little human surely thinks so too.”

Ah… that… Loki wasn’t so sure.

“I ruined it, I deserve nothing but the hatred and disgust I’ve earned from my darling.” Loki huffed out. “I manipulated, lied, and destroyed the trust of my love.”

“Dear, there’s nothing final in these matters…” Frigga smiled softly. “If that loved blossomed once, you may rescue it and nourish it again. But first… you need to apologize.”

“I don’t think I’m wanted anywhere near hearing range.” Loki explained.

“Do you think the love between your mother, and I always had a perfect relationship?” Odin smiled.

“Your father was too temperamental for that” Frigga intervened with a smile and both parents looked at each other with love. “But when you truly love someone and you make a mistake, you swallow your pride and make up for your wrongdoings.”

Loki smiled softly, he remembered it well. When Odin’s temper got the best of him because of the stress of being a king, Odin made sure to make up for Frigga know how truly sorry he was, and Frigga who already knew her husband’s temper was an expert on not letting her affect her, knowing it was never personal. She had truly been blessed with infinite patience given she dealt with three men with bad tempers and yet her kindness and loving nature knew no end. It was not rare to see Odin gifting Frigga fancy gifts and spend long hours apologizing and dedicating the day to her. It wasn’t the perfect arrangement, but no relationship was.

Loki chuckled softly.

“Thanks…” he smiled and both parents tended a hand to him with a smile. “I know what I have to do.”

Ready to say goodbye, Loki placed his hands on top of Odin and Frigga’s, and with that, the figure of his parents faded under a green light as Loki’s palms stopped glowing. Loki let out a little laugh as he wiped his tears.

His illusions had never been so benevolent towards himself, they were either torturous or for a fake sense of gloating and dissociation. But your compassion had changed him forever. He could use them for closure and to guide him with the stuff he knew but needed to hear. And… you deserved that at least.

He got up and went outside and went to a trip. It took him around an hour to get to the city and a couple more hours to get his several stops get several gifts. A lovely white bouquet of flowers, a box of your favorite chocolates, a necklace with a cute silver heart shaped locket and got it printed with a small photo, a copy of a photo he had carried from one of your first “dates” you got where you were giving him a small kiss in the cheek and cupped the other one, a symbol of your shared love.

On his way back, Loki held the original photo close to his chest and sighed. He prayed this would work as he was on his way to see you. He knocked on your door and hid his gifts behind himself, not even remembering he could’ve concealed them with his magic from how nervous he was.

His chest tightened as you opened the door, your eyes and nose were red, and your cheeks were stained with tears. Oh Norns… He had hurt you really bad.

“Love… Please… let me explain” Loki spoke softly.

“What do you need to explain, Loki?” you asked and sniffled, practically murdering him when you called him Loki instead of one of your lovely cheesy pet names. “That I was just a toy for you to play with and pretend that you loved me, so you’d be a free man? I got that quite clearly.”

You were ready to slam the door on his face, but he reached his leg to stop you. He nearly dropped one of your gifts. You looked at him confused, eying him up and down before sighing in defeat, opening the door he walked inside of your little room. He saw the little night table covered with used tissues and the bed’s decorative cushions were all over the place. It broke his heart.

“What do you want, Loki?” you asked tiredly as you sat on the bed, placing a cushion on your lap and against your chest.

“My darling, I was the biggest, most cruel and inconsiderate imbecile of all 9 Realms” he said, kneeling before you as he handed you the bouquet of flowers. You gently placed the flowers on your lap, still looking at him.

“It is true, that I was looking to just find a relationship to pretend I had adapted to living on earth” he spoke. “It was a selfish, shallow, and dishonest reason to make you mine… But I did it. It was heartless and there’s no excuse or reason for you to forgive that. But I beg of you to stay here… never speak to me again if you need, but don’t settle to a life of misery just to avoid me. I will happily accept being locked up in a dungeon for a hundred years, so you don’t see the likes of me again…”

He handed you the chocolate, and your gaze softened for a second as you saw the chocolate, he remembered which ones you liked the most. You opened your mouth to speak, but a gentle squeeze to your hands let you know Loki still wanted to speak.

He had caused all of this for not telling you the truth, and now he wanted to fully bare his soul to you now.

“You offered me boundless kindness, patience despite my flaws, understanding to my pain and sins of the past, laughter like I hadn’t enjoyed before, you fed with the most delicious and warm foods I had ever eaten, you showed me the concept of dates and you bared me completely vulnerable to your touch and heart and you bared yourself completely to me without fear of me…” Loki continued, as tears streamed down his face, drowning in regret. “And all I did was play with you and betray the trust your selfless heart gave me without asking for anything in return.”

He placed his forehead on your knees and sobbed, completely ashamed of what he had done to you. He didn’t deserve your forgiveness, but he felt like he’d die without you. And he’ deserve it.

“I don’t care” you finally spoke, and he looked up, he saw the tears streaming down your face. “You’re the God of Mischief and Lies, there are countless stories of how you lied and manipulated to get away with anything you wanted… I should’ve expected I’d be just that.”

“No— No, darling!” Loki held your hands and pressed his lips against your knuckles. “No, my sweet, you— I was selfish. I wanted a cover up, yes, but what I found was love, I found the butterflies in my stomach you always speak of. I found the warm of your hands lingering on my skin after our dates. I found myself awake during the night sighing over those lovely eyes I’ve now so cruelly filled with tears…” Loki spoke softly.

You were shaking in your place as you did your best not to cry and interrupt him. He brushed his finger along your cheek as in appreciation of your effort.

“None of what you heard that night was true in my heart…” he assured you “I never felt so disgusted I wanted to vomit; it was guilt that was killing me from the inside… knowing I was hurting such a beautiful flower.”

He handed you the heart locket and you opened it, seeing the photo made you sob as silently as you could.

“I was selfish and a liar. I don’t blame you if you don’t believe me and want nothing to do with me again. But please know that my heart beats for and because of you only.” He spoke. “I fell hopelessly and irredeemably in love with you. I swear that on my life.”

You looked at him and smiled, as you wrapped your arms around his neck and sobbed now freely and unrestrained. Time seemed to stop for Loki as he hugged you back, taking in your scent and caressing you. Tears fell down his face and he held you, afraid you’d disappear if he let go of you.

You forgave him. He didn’t think he’d ever be so lucky to find a kind soul that would forgive even his worst mistake. But he found it, you were kind enough to do so. Your wrapped your arms around him in a warm hug and Loki was able to let all the pain and guilt go… He couldn’t undo his mistakes, but he could be better, and he wanted to be his best self for you.

“Thank you… Norns, I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” he repeated over and over between whispers and tears as he held you tight.

You sat up straight and cupped his face and laughed softly as you still cried happy tears.

“You’re gonna have to buy me a new box of tissues, you booger” you joked softly with a sniffle, and pressed your forehead to his and grabbed a tissue to blow your nose.

“I’ll give you the entire world if you so desire, my love” he spoke with a gentle smile. “Just say the word.”

“I don’t need the world” you smiled and kissed his cheek. “I have everything I need right here.”

“What did I do to deserve you?” he chuckled softly as he grabbed a tissue to wipe his tears and blow his nose. “I’m a disaster and somehow I still found the most precious little dove all for myself.”

You held him tightly in a hug… in silence for a few minutes before you spoke again.

“Did you think I was annoying when we first met?” you asked with a stern look on your face. “I want the truth.”

“Truthfully… you were a nightmare…” Loki admitted in a soft playful tone.

“HEY!” you whined and dug your fingers into the crevices of his ribs making him burst out laughing. “I said honest, not mean!”

“Ehehehe! Lohohohohove, let me finish!” he giggled, letting you have this, it was the least he could do. “P-Please, s-stohohohop that! Not there!”

You smiled and went to tickle his belly. Oh, you had really not liked that.

“Plehehehehehease, dahahaharling! I surrender!” he laughed and did his best to not squirm.

“Fine… what is it?” you asked, as you sat sideways on his lap, already happily cuddling with him.

Thank whatever superior force that was out there… Oh, you’re a wonderful blessing.

“You’re a nightmare turned into a dream” he clarified and he didn’t even bother fighting the urge to squeeze you tightly.

“You have 3 seconds to explain how that’s a compliment o I’ll tickle you until you puncture a lung.”

“Ihihi— I mean like, when you start having a bad dream… but it turns around as the most wonderful of dreams, those that you still think about after waking up.” Loki said, and as those words he was sure he had fried his brain because he didn’t make any sense.

But that was enough for you.

“You’re lucky you’re cute.” You grumbled.

“C’mon… don’t be mad at me for being foolish and wrong” he smiled as he squeezed you tight. “Surely you thought I was insufferable at first as well, we’re so different after all.”

You smiled and shook your head.

“I love my pretty prince” you smiled and picked a tissue yourself to clean your face. “Flaws, differences, and all.”

“Do you, now?” he grinned cheekily. “I sure am a lucky one to be called yours.”

“A Loki one” you giggled, and Loki made a scowl of disgust. “Sorry! I thought it too late when I said it and— hehehe!”

“Oh, that was awful— C’mere… you!”

“W-What?! NO! NOHOHOHOHO! LOHOHOHOKI, STOP IHIHIHIT!”

As he made you laugh and held you against him, he couldn’t doubt how fortunate he was to be so undoubtedly yours.

| MASTERPOST |

#marvel tickles #marvel fluff #loki laufeyson #ticklish!loki #lee!loki #ler!loki #ticklish!reader #lee!reader #ler!reader #loki x reader #loki tickle #loki fluff #ducky writes tickles

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gold-rhine · 10 months

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ok as i said repeatedly, my biggest problem with Inazuma rewrite is that I can’t figure out how to make Signora death be good or at least make sense, but I’m realizing its useless to try fitting square peg into a round hole when the perfect option for it already exists. Signora has nothing to do with Inazuma, thematically, narratively or in any sense. She just should not be here at all.

If we have to to write Signora’s death, it should OBVIOUSLY be in Venti’s second story quest set in Mare Jivari, a place referenced in venti’s first quest, “sea of ashes where the wind does not blow.”

she became crimson witch bc she lost loved ones in cataclysm, was angry and disappointed in barbatos for not protecting Mond and those she became powerful enough to do it herself, at the cost of becoming a monster. Before fatui recruited her, she was hunting down demons and never hurt innocents, despite ppl being afraid and ungrateful to her. her first appearance in the game is confrontation with venti. this is her theme.

traveler and venti should be in here with some mond expedition or whatever, diluc should also be there due to Crimson Witch Parallels and also bc there is apparently a phoenix in Mare Jivari and thats thematic for them both. mb signora and venti both trying to get phoenix, idk whats the plot is, the important thing is that signora and venti are confronting each other again and hurling insults, mb there is a boss fight with her

but later like corrupted beasts or whatever attack mond expedition and signora is at first gleeful, she laughs when venti and co are fighting, but then like Uber Lava Dragon or smth shows up and beats venti up and its clear that it will destroy the expedition if not stopped. and there are just normal simple mond ppl there, terrified. and on paper all signora has to do is just let this happen, have her revenge on barbatos, achieve her goal, win and leave

but! she became crimson witch precisely bc of the situation like this! deep down, underneath it all, she is not just a fatui agent, she is a woman who wanted to protect mond when its god failed to do that. so she curses, yells about useless vermin god and steps up to fight the beast.

she defeats him, but is mortally wounded. as she’s dying, venti comes up to her. souls of people who die in Mare Jivari are trapped, because this is the place where the wind does not blow. but today there is a single breeze here.

i never asked for your forgiveness, signora says to venti proudly as he starts glowing with the divine light

i know, he smiles, you don’t need to.

he takes her soul as she dies like he did with stanley’s in his 1st quest, bc barbatos was never a warrior god, he was a bard, an inspiration for ppl to rise up and fight for themselves and then a storyteller to keep the memories of these fighters. and today a story of another protector has joined the fold.

#rhine talks #la signora #signora #genshin impact #genshin

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dyslexicmammon · 1 year

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Unwanted

Characters: Lucifer (Obey me!), Solomon (Obey me!) [not together]

CW// SFW, Angst ig? Yelling, Implied Lucifer x Mc, Implied Solomon x Mc, Nightbringer MC/attendant MC, You/Your pronouns used

A/N: Hiii~ I haven't written something in ages and I literally cannot remember how this drabble came about but, here you go. I couldn't find a way to end it because for me, Solomon is very hard to write for/about. The ending is open to add onto if you would like! uhhh idk what else to add. I'm gonna try and write more of my ideas since I'm having a hard time with art atm. Again this is just a short drabble lol

Chapter 2 / Ao3 / Divider Credit

“Here's some food Lucifer, you haven’t eaten all day and I’m worried- '' You were cut off by a groan. Lucifer rubbed his brow and with disdain in his voice “If I was hungry I would have come down to eat at the agreed times. I don’t need you out of all people to worry about me. Leave.” He touches his tongue with his gloved hand then goes to turn the page of the documents he’s currently working on, not daring to look up from his work.

Tears well up in your eyes as you place the well-prepared food you had made for the ungrateful Avatar of Pride down on his desk. On your way out you accidentally slam his study door behind you. You suddenly get a ping on your D.D.D, with its familiar and expected buzz you knew it was Solomon “I’m waiting outside ❤ ️”. You begin to move away from Lucifer's study, sighing and clutching your D.D.D to your chest. You hear a faint call of your name from behind the door. Ignoring it, you begin to make your exit.

The tears are having a hard time staying in as they desperately roll down your cheeks. In the main hall you spot Mammon and Beel who were talking about dinner. Desperately trying to go unrecognised by them you begin to walk further to the left of the hall you were now sharing. “Where do ya think you’re going mc??” Mammon reaches out to grab your arm. Without thinking you pull away, only sniffling in response. “Yeah we haven’t had dinner yet” Beel says with a sympathetic half smile. Wiping your tears aside and in a shaky voice you apologise to the hungry demon. Looking at him, hoping to see that compassionate smile you once knew from your long nights hanging out and eating snacks. Only to be met with a faint smile from the gluttonous demon.

Mammon laughs nervously, feeling the tension in the air then announces “It's okay Beel! We don’t need some attendant taking care of us! We got this!” and giving his brother a slap on the back. Feeling unwelcome from the 2 oldest brothers' attitude you pick up your pace once again and head straight for the front door. A couple moments pass or faint grumbles from both demons until you hear the Avatar of Greed as he runs and reaches for your hand “Hey! You haven’t had dinner yet either!”. Unable to hold back the tears anymore, a steady stream begins to trail down your face as you start crying uncontrollably. “You said it yourself! You can cook yourself and your brother's dinner just fine. You can also clean up after yourself. You don’t need me! so let go Mammon!” You had never raised your voice at any of them before. After pulling yourself free from his grasp, you exclaim “Solomon is taking me out to dinner & I have to go. Not that you people care if I’m here or not. Oh and don’t bother cooking for Lucifer either.” Suddenly looking up at the banister, like he had control over your body you noticed the demon himself. Trying to hide the panic in your eyes you wipe away your tears and swiftly begin your descent upon the front door once more, ready to brace the elements. “Have a nice night.” you say, your voice cracking a little before slamming the door behind you.

With the tension seemingly broken by the wooden door now between you and the avatars the tears flow harder than ever before and the air becomes heavy in your lungs. That's when you hear light human footsteps rushing towards you. Solomon was now staring in shock. With his face merely inches away from your own. He quickly but gently wraps his arms around you and holds the back of your head. “Oh my, Mc what's happened? Why are you upset?” Responding to his touch, your arms snake around his chest as you wail into his shoulder. Hearing the demons on the other side fast approaching, he picks you up and casts a shield spell to protect you and silence the yells of a certain white haired demon.

“Let's get you out of here my love, our date can wait” he quickly begins to escort you away from the HOL. You can hear faint yells from what you assume to be the brothers calling your name...

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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 years

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Word Count : 3.0k TW : arguing ; pushing ; one (1) slap ; unprotected sex (Y'all please don't do this) ; manipulation ; yandere themes ; 18+ A/N : yay!! Thank you for another yandere!Lee Know ask!!! I love writing them!! They're so fun!! And thank you for being amazing! @whatudowhennooneseesyou Request : What if Lee know and y/n have a fight (because it's yandere, idk maybe she wants to visits her parents or something) and then they proceed to have make-up in the shower? Pairing : yandere!Lee Know x F!Reader

You were done up, not entirely, not really at all, but you weren’t wearing your usual pajamas and your hair was actually brushed instead of being thrown up into the usual bun that you had it in. That was the sign, the only sign to Lee Know that you were up to something, and he didn’t even need to question what it might be considering you knew he thought you were beautiful no matter what you wore or how you did your hair… And there was only one reason why you would actually try.

“Where are you going?” His voice made you jump, not because you didn’t expect him to say anything, but because you didn’t expect him to actually be there. He had told you he would be at work, and you even watched him leave the house earlier that morning. The only thing you could think of is that he had come home at some point after seeing you get half ass ready in the cameras, and your earphones were so loud that you didn’t even hear him come in.

Slowly turning in the direction of the kitchen where he was standing, you could see the look of agitation on his face, but there was a guard there, as if he was waiting for you to say something smart, to say something that wouldn’t get you into trouble, but you weren’t so quick on your feet, not under his scrutinizing glare and you blurted out the truth, albeit, with a little bit of stammering. “Uh… I… I just wanted to… My mom… My family… I haven’t seen them and…” You froze when his eyes turned ice cold, his nostrils flaring as he set down the cup that he had been holding.

“You. Were going to leave me?!” He seethed, his steps cold and calculated as he moved closer to you, and you were still frozen in your spot, unable to move, unable to even look away from him. “What did I tell you about leaving?! Why do you always want to leave?!” He shouted, his hands gripping tightly onto your shoulders, keeping you in place just in case you were to try to get away, not that you’d ever try something so foolish when he was literally right in front of you. “I do everything for you, everything! You’re ungrateful! You’re so selfish!” He seethed as his fingers dug deeper into your shoulder blades, causing you to wince from the pain.

Even though it hurt, you tried to think through the pain that you knew he was unintentionally causing you, trying to form a basic sentence in your mind that would hopefully calm him down. “I-I know! I’m… I just wanted to see her! Don’t you think she misses me…? M-My mom… She loved you… Y-You can even come with me!” It felt like you were bargaining, trying to get him to agree to letting you go, but your form of bribery only seemed to irritate him more, his nostrils flaring as he pushed you back, his hands immediately falling to his sides and balling into fists as you stumbled to the floor. “What the hell, Minho!?”

He had never gotten like this before, sure, he had yelled at you, and he had taken some extreme measures to keep you with him, but he had never been violent like this, he had never literally pushed you. “You only think about yourself…” He mumbled, his voice low but his eyes never landing on you as they wandered around the room. “I love you… I love you and what do I get in return? You just… You throw it all away! You throw it in the garbage for everyone else! What about me?! Don’t you ever think about me!?” He seethed, and you pathetically slid back across the floor, trying to take the moment to create some sort of distance between the two of you. “I could buy you the fucking world and everyone in it and you’d still want to leave… You always want to fucking leave!”

His eyes landed on you again once your back was against the wall, your nose twitching with sniffles and your sight becoming blurred with tears. “I just wanted to see her! I would come back! Why are you being like this?!” You shouted back, a short burst of courage having you raise your voice until you saw his body stiffen, his jaw set and his anger evident from your rare display of disobedience and, in his eyes, disrespect.

In the blink of an eye he was standing in front of you, his fist connecting with the wall, a flurry of drywall particles and chipped paint falling down around you, dusting the top of your head and causing you to cough as you accidentally breathed it in. “Why am I being like this?! Are you fucking joking!? That takes a lot of fucking nerve, Y/N! You don’t have to work, you don’t have to do anything, I give you everything you want and I ask for one thing. One fucking thing, and you can’t even do that!”

It was like you were caged against the wall with him standing in front of you, but it got even worse when he lowered himself to your level, gripping your chin and forcing you to look at him, his nails creating crescent divots in your skin where they dug in too deeply. “I can’t work. I can’t do anything because of you.” You hissed through clenched teeth, trying to move away from him, but his grip only tightened. “Everything that you get me… I never ask for them… You only get them because you think it’ll make me love you. The only thing I want is to be able to see my family, and that’s the one thing you never let me do.”

His breaths fell hot and heavy against your face, condensating your skin, but you couldn’t look away, he wouldn’t let you, you didn’t have a choice, because just like everything else with him, there was only one option and it was what he wanted. “You’re so manipulative.” He spat, pulling your face closer to his until your noses were almost touching. “I know why you want to go to your mothers… You’ll go there and you’ll play the victim, say that I’m keeping you prisoner when all I want to do is protect you, all I want to do is keep you with me. She’ll keep you away though, she’ll steal you from me…” His hands began to shake and you knew he was beyond angry, beyond irritated, he was absolutely irate.

“No… Minho, I told you I’d-” Was it your words or the sound of your voice alone that made him snap completely? You weren’t sure, but your sentence was cut off by the sudden sound of skin against skin resonating off the walls, and it was only when an unfamiliar sting spread through your cheek that you realized the sound was from him, from you, the sudden smack causing you to go silent yet jolting the tears from your lower lashes as they finally fell down your face. “You… I…”

It had never happened before, and even he seemed shocked by what he had done, sobered from his anger as soon as his hand landed against your cheek, but he had no choice but to follow through before he fell back, his own eyes wide, in disbelief from his own actions. “Y/N… I’m sorry… I…” But you didn’t give him time to explain, time to apologize, you had taken the short amount of time that you felt you had to run into the bedroom, slamming the door and quickly going to the bathroom.

The house was quiet, it was still, and you weren’t sure how long the silence lasted, barely able to focus on the ticking of the second hand of the clock in the bedroom that sounded so loud now. Your cries had subsided along with the fresh sting of the unexpected hit, and now the pain was dull, a minute ache that was only matched by the feeling in your chest whenever you played the moment over in your mind.

Minho had never laid a hand on you before, not in any way that could be described as anything other than love. Maybe you had pushed him, maybe it was your fault. You knew how he was, you knew how he could get when he thought he was going to lose you, yet you still tried to leave, you still tried to get him to let you. It didn’t make it any less upsetting though.

You had locked yourself in the bathroom, and he had yet to come to you. Was he upset with himself? It sure looked like he had been when you had left him in the living room. Maybe the initial shock had worn off for him too, maybe he was just contemplating what to do. What was he supposed to do though? You felt like even the sight of him would cause you to cry, and you just wanted to wash those thoughts away, wash away the memory of it, you just wanted to forget about it because you knew that in the end… You’d still be stuck here, you still wouldn’t be able to leave.

With a quick turn of the handle, the sound of water rushing through the pipes hidden behind the patched up walls filled the once silent home before it came raining down out of the shower head. Steam quickly billowed through the air and filled the smaller room, fogging up the mirror and blocking out the image of you, with your puffy eyes and disheveled hair. It’s not like you wanted to see yourself that way anyway.

Your clothes were stripped and pooled in the middle of the floor before stepping into the shower, standing under the pouring water, trying your best to find some sort of relaxation under the flow of it, the temperature high and burning against the sensitive skin of your shoulders that had been held too tight, surely bruised, but you didn’t really want to find out if you were right.

The sound of the water drowned out the lock being undone on the doorknob, masking the sound of the door being opened and muting the sound of footsteps, bare feet padding against the tile floor until the curtain was pulled back and Minho climbed in behind you. Your breath hitched in your throat when you felt fingers, lighter than the drops of water, brushing up your spine and then across your shoulders. “I’m sorry… For what I did, for the way I acted.” He murmured, his body pressing against your back as his arms wrapped loosely around you. “That’s no way for me to treat you, love. I caused you pain, and fear, that is inexcusable, and I won’t try to excuse it. I was wrong, but I want you to know that I love you, I love you more than anything.”

His touch was so gentle as his fingers glided along your skin, softly over your hips and then down between your legs, your lungs burning for oxygen from holding your breath for so long, but the sudden feeling of his index finger brushing along your clit had you gasping softly. “Wh-What are you doing…?” You whispered, but your body was so attuned to him, to his touch, that you found yourself leaning back against his chest, your legs almost instinctively spreading for him. You craved his touch, his love, at least when he showed it this way.

“I want to make it up to you…” He cooed, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear as he started to rub slow circles against your sensitive bud. It felt like your entire body was on fire, or maybe it was just the heat of the shower, or was it because of what he was doing? Maybe it was a combination of the two, but your knees began to buckle, your quiet moans only muffled by the sound of the water pattering against the shower floor. “Let me do this for you, show you how much I love you? Hmm?”

And how could you say no? He had hurt you, he had yelled at you, you were devastated, but you loved the way he felt, and maybe it was foolish, but when he loved you like this, it almost made it easier for you to forget about what he was really doing. “Mmn…” You whimpered, a sound of agreement followed by a quick nod of your head.

He moved you from under the running water, carefully turning you around and bending you over, your hand firmly planted against the shower wall as he stood behind you, lining up the head of his cock with your entrance, your walls already tightening in anticipation, waiting to feel yourself stretched and filled by him. “You’re so pretty, so beautiful, my wonderful girl…” His words were hushed, spoken so quietly that you could barely make them out as he eased himself into your tight hole, shaky gasps leaving your parted lips as your fingers tried to find some form of grip against the slippery tile wall. “Shh…Shh… It’s okay, my love… I’ve got you, I’ll always have you… You don’t have to worry…”

Usually his movements would be quick, his thrusts ruthless and harsh, his fingers would dig so roughly into your hips that you’d feel the pain from it for days afterwards. He’d be careless with the words that he throws around, trying to prove a point while also taking out his anger, but this time, this time he was so soft, so tender. His hips rolled forward, pushing himself deeper into you as he kissed away the droplets of water that clung to your skin. His hold on your own hips was light, just enough to keep you from slipping, but there wouldn’t be any pain afterwards. The only thing that you’d feel once he was done would be love, you were loved by him, as crazy as he was. Maybe his twisted form of love for you was the only thing he could truly feel.

“M-Minho, please…” A plea as you pushed yourself back against him, your moan growing louder as you felt him hit deeper than he had been, your head going limp and falling forward and his fingers digging deeper into your hips as he tried to hold you still. “More…” You whimpered, wanting to feel him the way you were used to, wanting to be filled by him in every single way.

A low chuckle sounded from his chest as his hand came down lightly against your ass before he leaned over and kissed your shoulder once more. “Just let me love you… this way…” His palms and fingers kneaded into the skin of your hips and then down to your ass once more, rocking his hips just a little faster though to try to appease you. “Such a good girl for me, love… Wanting to be filled by me… Love the way you sound when you beg for me.”

Praise, intermingled with just a slight hint of humiliation, why did you love when he talked to you like this? Was there something wrong with you? “Fuck… feel so good… Minho…” You whined, squeezing tightly and pushing back against him, your breath shuddering and your thighs shaking as his cock brushed against that one spot that gave you the most amazing high, your eyes closing tightly and your nails digging into the tile wall. “Righ… Right there… Minho… Don’t stop.”

Your words were like music to his ears, the way you moaned them out, breathy and laced with the ecstasy you felt as his tip continued to brush against that sweet spot, your vision growing hazy as the knot in your stomach tightened more and more. “Are you gonna cum, love? Hmm? Want me to keep going?” You could tell he was trying to sound cocky, but the tone of his voice wavered in pitch and volume, leaning over you as his own hands slapped against the wall above your own to hold himself up.

“Y-Yes! Please… fuck!” You cried out, your hands sliding up to hold onto his, breaths coming out in sputters and tears building in the corner of your eyes. “Gonna… Gonna cu-“ You couldn’t even get the word out as that knot in your stomach came undone, your knees buckling as you cried out.

A slew of curses left his lips as your walls sucked him in, coating the length of his cock in your arousal and your release, feeling him twitch as quiet grunts left him, his hips bucking forward at an unsteady rhythm. “Shit… so good… feel so good, love…” He praised as warm strings of cum shot out, painting your slick pink walls in a thick coating of white. “Love you, so much…” He professed, his forehead falling right in the middle of your shoulder blades. You could feel his chest rising and falling heavily against your lower back, his fingers loosening their hold on your hips. “We should go lay down… Get some rest.”

The water had, at some point, gone cold, chasing away the steam that had once filled the room. This would be the end of the day, the two of you would lay down and the sun would set and you’d both fall asleep with no other word about what had happened earlier. It would be forgotten as easily as every other argument that was had about the same exact thing. There was no need to dwell on it any longer, it’s not like you’d ever get to leave, but, as strange as it seemed, you’d continue to push the issue if every argument ended like this. It made it worth it… and maybe, maybe at some point, you’d finally get what you really wanted.

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leaft-the-chat · 9 months

Text

patience is a virtue

ft. luocha

content. (s)mut, afab!reader, dubcon, sex toys, blindfold, bondage, imprisonment, implied power dynamic? idk i wrote this when i was horny, 3.5k wc

a softer and slightly longer interpretation of @mirangel's post because that idea was so genius i can't survive on just crumbs-

he's been gone for so long that you've forgotten how to wait, so he teaches you again.

You still remembered the way he kissed you.

The soft velvet of his lips on yours, gentle hands roaming, touching, caressing every inch of your body. He did it so that he’d never forget the feel of you on his long, arduous journeys.

Every time he came back, Luocha decorated you with silk and gold. In all shapes and sizes, each piece costed a fortune. He would never tell you the price, lest you besiege him with a mouthful about spending too much on you, and he would never admit that the thought of you finding out the full value of the garments hugging your body in his stead while he travelled far, far away made him so damn hard.

But that would have to be put on hold for the time being.

“What do you mean, you won’t be back until tomorrow?”

Luocha cursed himself for the blood rushing to his cock at the sight of your crestfallen face. “I’m sorry, dear,” he crooned and wiped a tear off your reddened cheek. How he wanted to ram himself into you against the wall right then and there. “But work is work. I promise I’ll make it up to you when I return.”

He revelled in the way that your brows furrowed. Flawless manicures gripping the bedsheets, wrinkling the frilly, delicate lingerie on your even more delicate frame, tits hard and swollen, eager to be touched. Such a fine specimen you were, tweaked and altered to perfection - all by his own hands.

“You promised,” you whined, thighs clenching, missing his touch, missing the way his big kok filled you up so full and tight. “I didn’t touch myself at all just for you. Need you so bad, I can’t take it anymore…”

Luocha pressed a kiss to your forehead. What an ungrateful fucking brat. It seemed that he’d spoiled you so much that you really thought not fingering yourself for a little was comparable to the blood and sweat he racked, working to lavish you with riches and gold. You were his pretty little girl, but naughty girls needed to be corrected.

His thumb ghosted over your puffy lips. “Tell you what,” he cooed. “You’ve done more than enough, dear, but I need you to do one more little thing for me, alright?”

You hiccuped. “I told you, Luocha, I can’t-”

“No, no, it’s a bit… different this time.” He chuckled. “I know you can do it, love. Just a little more.” He gazed at you. “Please? For me.”

The scene that played out before him was like a script that it was laughable. Your pretty mouth hang open, head trying to process what he just said. They say that eyes were the windows to the soul, well, the moment Luocha looked into yours, he knew that you were fucked out beyond recognition, a dumb slut ready to beg for the mind-numbing drug that was his dick.

“O-okay, then…” You finally managed, and Luocha smiled to himself. He didn’t even have to lift a finger.

“Good girl.”

Luocha kissed you again and got up from the bed. He rummaged through the drawers and hummed a little tune, making sure to take his sweet time before procuring what looked like a blindfold, a gag… a pair of metal handcuffs… and a vibrator.

Your heart dropped to your stomach. “No. No, Luocha, no. I can’t- you can’t-”

“Shh, it’s alright, my sweet.” He sat back next to you and held your hands in his. “I promise I’ll take care of you once it’s over. You just have to trust me, alright? You can do this for me, right, love?” Luocha looked at you pleadingly.

Now you knew exactly why he was a merchant.

“Fine,” you whimpered as the last of your will crumbled under his eyes. “But you better get back the moment you finish your work.”

Luocha smiled, and the heat between your legs nearly went to your heart. Nearly. “Right after work finishes, and not a moment later.”

First he moved your hair out of the way and gently wrapped the white strip of cloth over your eyes, complete with a small bow at the back (he couldn’t help himself, it went perfectly with your cute lingerie!). Next, you felt the cold metal digging into your wrists with a sharp click!

Luocha’s fingers parted your lips open and you unconsciously licked and sucked them in just the way that he liked, made him laugh. “Patience, dear,” Luocha hummed. “We haven’t even started.” Despite your whines, he pulled his digits out and pushed the cold gag in.

A roast pig with an apple in its mouth.

Luocha sneered. You trusted him so much that it was just so cute and so pathetic. Sitting in front of him blind and handcuffed and drooling at the corner of your puffy lips like a dumb bitch. He could pin you down and choke all air out of your lungs. He could sell you to some some cheap brothel, turn you into a free-use fuckmeat for a measly few credits and you wouldn’t even know.

“Beautiful.” he mumbled. He pushed your back on the bed, and spread your legs apart, admiring how the skimpy strings barely did anything to hide your sopping wet cunt clenching around nothing. Once again, you did all the work for him.

Luocha pushed the vibrator into your pussy, erecting a lewd moan from your lips. He hadn’t turned it on and you were already being such a shore. “Still now, love, and follow me.”

Luocha helped you up from the bed, one arm wrapped around your waist. Your legs shook from the cold, foreign object nestled between your walls. Even if you were gagged and blindfolded, he knew you were asking where he was leading you, but all you had for an answer was the sound of creaking wood.

You felt his hands guiding your back against a tight, enclosed space. Was me putting you in the closet? And yet, this familiar scent of wood and flowers…

“I never said that I’d leave you alone at home now, did I?” Luocha laughed before closing the coffin shut.

Pitch-dark, you choked on the inky black of the coffin. The rough wood scraped at your naked skin, which would’ve hurt if it weren’t for the low buzz of the vibrator in your cunt keeping you inches away from passing out.

Luocha made an effort to lug you around, walking, talking to as many people as he could, whether they be business acquaintances or simply people passing by who must’ve thought him a bit off his rockers.

“Interested in these jade charms, sir?”

“I must admit I’m a bit intrigued,” he’d lie through his teeth, urging the storekeeper to ramble more and more on inconsequential trinkets.

“Thank you for your patron, benefactor,” you heard a purr through the coffin - that was very close to the coffin. That was right next to the coffin. Luocha knew this, and instantly flicked the switch, turning the tremble inside you up a few notches. Your knees quivered and you could practically swallow the gag in your mouth.

“Oh, and you surely have heard of our illustrious general, the Divine Foresight? He seldom shows himself in the public, but I do have some pictures of him. Allow me a moment here, my dear benefactor…”

The presence next to the coffin left. Yet before you could sigh in relief, another voice rang, though standing a distance away from you. “…back on the Luofu already…” A loud thud! resonated in front of the coffin - of you - like a sword stabbing a rock. “….must really miss the Xianzhou, hehe!”

You heard Luocha’s deep chuckle. “Simply business dealings, Miss Sushang.”

“…Lot to catch… Earl just released a new flavour of tea that’s absolutely delicious!” The girl squealed and stepped closer. You could hear her more clearly now. “If you’re free right now, wanna try it out? I’m on my break.”

You could sense your partner placing a hand on his chin like how he always did. “Alas…” He sighed and stroked the side of the coffin. “Perhaps another time. Duty calls me.”

“Aww, good luck on your business then. By the way, have you heard? That really young boy who’s the lieutenant got beaten up by…”

Luocha pressed the remote, and instantly the vibrations in your pussy doubled. Sushang trailed off into a tangent about something that you didn’t quite register as the hot throbbing between your thighs override your brain.

But it hurt, it hurt so much because the vibrator couldn’t reach deep enough. Luocha had purposefully chosen one that was just a little too small, a tad too short for your deepest places so that you’d keel over for him once he was done. The intense sensations cloaked in darkness crawled and itched all over your skin, and all you could think of was Luocha, Luocha, Luocha, Luocha, Luocha, Luocha-

Suddenly, something hit the back of the coffin and you fell forward. The door cracked open and the tiniest ray of light entered the dark space, but not before you caught sight of a glove hand deftly shutting it close and catching the coffin - you - before it hit the ground.

A muffled voice moaned. “Urgh! …so sorry! …be goi-”

“Excuse me, my friend here-” you listened to thee masculine voice yelp in pain, replaced by a higher, pitchier one, “….like to… box that you’re carrying… C’mon, Chengjie, hurry up so we can return! Just one more til I win the game…”

You were rearranged with grunts and set on the ground again. “Of course,” Luocha replied. “What would you like to inquire of me?” They exchanged words that you couldn’t hear, but Luocha saying “Examine away” was all that you needed to know.

Fingers that weren’t his trailed over the coffin, grazing, touching, caressing the coffin, sighing in admiration as if they could see through the wooden skin of the casket. Your heart thundered in your chest. “The carvings are gorgeous, but why do you, um, carry such a large thing around?”

“Weellll,” Sushang’s voice drawled, “this amazing thing here is called a ‘coughing!’”

“A coffin,” Luocha corrected. “It is used in burial rites, to transport the body of the dead to the other side.”

The stranger voice cried, “You’ve got a corpse in there!?”

“This is merely the…” One of Luocha’s hand met the coffin, while the other pushed the virator up to the max. Your knees instantly buckled. “…Tool. Of my trade.”

Too much. It was too much. You tried to grip the walls for some form of assistance, but it was too late. Your legs gave over, and you tumled to the side with a loud crash.

Silence fell.

“Ah, it seems that one of the bolts had come undone. I can’t expect much more, this coffin has accompanied me for quite some time.”

“…Didn’t you say that you were here last time to deliver this to a business associate?”

“Yes, but they were away from the Luofu at the time due to unexpected matters. This time I have returned to fulfil my promise. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I will have to deliver it right away.”

The moment he opened the coffin, Luocha nearly came in his pants. He wondered how the entirety of the Luofu didn’t immediately smell the heavy scent of sex that emanated from the coffin.

There, you were barely hanging on your last thread of sanity, whole body shaking, chin and neck covered in drool with thighs drenched for Yaoshi knows how long. Your hair mussed, sticking to the back of your neck, your frilly laces slipping off for the whole world to see your pert nipples and pink little pussy…

Luocha would’ve taken his time to admire the view if it weren’t for the fact that you were naked in the back of an alleyway.

He removed the vibrator between your swollen hole and placed a soft kiss on your tear-stained cheek. “Not a moment late, yes?” His eyes shone with glee as you fell on your knees and your face nuzzled, whimpering, sniffling his crotch. “Right, you can’t speak. Hold still.”

The moment the gag was off, all that you managed to spew was incomprehensible blabber. “S’ mean…” you whined, sniffling and tugging the crotch of his pants with your teeth. “You’re so mean, Luocha… Kept me waiting for so long… Was gonna die in there…”

Luocha grinned. “I apologize, dearest, work kept me. But all is over. I’m here. I’ll take care of you.”

He unzipped his pants to free his hardened cock. He forced your mouth open, shoving his length in. The feel of your warm and wet throat made him groan. “Take it,” Luocha panted. “Take me so well like that slut that you are.”

Tears brimmed at the corners of your eyes from how rough he was fucking your mouth, but you didn’t - couldn’t - mind. Being left in the coffin with a gag made your jaw sore and itching, and now Luocha was granting you the privilege of treating you with his dick. Each thrust sent shivers down your tortured cunt. You could even feel yourself leaking little by little.

But you were sloppy. Perhaps he’d miscalculated and left you in there for so long that you were actually turning stupid. But no matter. Luocha grabbed a fistful of your hair and yanked your head down, his balls slapping against your chin over and over again.

You gagged at the salty taste of his thick cock fucking your mouth, swollen head slamming against the back of your throat, so rough that your tits spilled out of the lace lingerie and your slick shamelessly watered the ground.

His movements were frantic now, you could tell he was getting close, shaking and twitching in your mouth. He was finally going to shoot his hot load down your-

“Did you really think it would be that easy?”

Luocha pulled his throbbing shaft out and tutted. “Look at you. Were you really going to cum just from getting your throat fucked?” He delighted at the sight of your lips connected to his dick through a flimsy string of saliva as you blindly try to find your way back to his dick, smearing drool all over yourself like a cat reaching for its toy.

His eyes glanced at the small wet spot under you. “Get up.”

You frowned. “H-huh…?”

“I said, get up.” Luocha pulled you up from your wobbly, overstimulated knees and pushed you against the wall, rutting and groaning at the feeling of grinding on your ass.

You could barely hold in the moans threatening to spill out of your mouth when his tip flicked against your sensitive clit. “L-Luocha! Stop it!”

Instantly, Luocha pulled away. “Of course, dear.” His voice dripped with mock disappointment. “You must be far too exhausted to continue. Shame, you’ve bee waiting all day for me, and yet-”

“No!” You cried. “Luocha, please, just put it in!”

You could practically taste the mirth in his voice. “And just what do you mean, ‘put it in?’”

“I wan’ you to put…” You gulped. “Wanna put your cock in, please, want you to fuck me dumb ‘til I can’t walk anymore, can’t think anymore. Please use me and fuck me and fill me to the brim with your cum…”

“Oh, but dearest-” Luocha rubbed circles on your clit, extracting a pleasured yelp from you, “you’re already dumb enough. Who was it that kept whining incessantly about my work like a stupid, spoiled whore?”

You sobbed. “I did.”

“And?”

“’M sorry, Luocha, ‘m so sorry-” Gloved fingers spread open your cunt and prodded at the wet entrance. “I won’t ever complain again, I’ll wait for you, Luocha, I’ll be patient, I’ll be a good girl, I’m sorry, Luocha, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry-”

Without warning Luocha buried his entire length inside you and hit your deepest parts, making you cry out in pain? Pleasure? It didn’t matter anymore, the only thing you knew was that you were filled to the brim with his thick, throbbing cock.

His thrusts were long and relentless, pushing in as deep as he could and pulling out until his tip barely touched your hole, relishing in the way that you whined and clenched around nothing then choking on your own moans as he slammed balls deep inside you again. Luocha thought that the vibrator would’ve loosened you up a bit, but no, you were just fucking tight like it was your first time.

Grunts and moans mixed in the air, set to the wet, squelching rhythm with the occasional smack! on your ass. He crushed you to himself. Clutching you tighter, arm wrapped around your waist, one hand twisting up in your hair. Fucking you like an animal. Hard and fast and unrelenting. Leaving you little time to breathe, to do anything other than surrender yourself to him, to chant him name like a broken, garbled prayer.

Soon Luocha’s thrusts came to a close, and sith one final swing of his hips, he emptied his load inside you.

You two stood in place, trying to catch your breath.

He pulled out. White, sticky cum oozed out of you, dripping down your thighs and on the ground. Some might have gotten on the coffin, but you doubted that anyone would notice the extra layer of paint on the already white casket.

But before you could even pull yourself together, Luocha hoisted you up against a nearby wall and lined his hard cock to your entrance again. “Don’t act so surprised,” he purred, “we still have an entire month to catch up on.”

The chimes and jingles of the girl’s bell were drowned out by the bustling market streets. One might think to ask why she was running around red-faced, but this was the Xianzhou Luofu, where the short-life hurried to make the most of their limited time, while the long life, in their eyes, lounged around and watched them with amusement.

Li Sushang, however, hurried to get the hell away from what she just witnessed.

Now she understood why he lugged that giant casket around. Business, her arse! (Oops, sorry, mom-) Oh, Aeons above, that man had managed to fool everyone with his princely face but really, Luocha was just a disgusting, messed-up perve-

“Woah, woah, slow down a bit there, officer!”

Huh?

Sushang snapped back into reality but it was too late. Her hands slipped and she tripped over her prized sword. Before she could tumble to the ground, though, a pair of strong arms caught her.

Sushang gasped in relief, but now her face flushed for a different reason. “Th-thank you, sir,” she croaked. Ugh, what was she doing? A Cloud Knight should be there to help the people, not the other way around!

The man helped her up and smiled. He had a handsome face and wore fancy armour embellished with Cloud Knight motifs. Sushang immediately realized that he must be one of her superiors. “I haven’t seen you around here very much,” he said with the slightest tilt of his head. “Are you a new recruit, miss?”

Sushang straightened up. “Yes, sir, deputy Cloud Knight Li Sushang at your service! I transferred here not too long ago from the Yaoqing so I’m not very familiar with the Luofu, but I’m steadily learning everyday!”

He chuckled. “Your shift is already over, yet you’re still hard at work. Your work ethic is admirable, officer Li.”

“Oh, no, I was just-” Sushang choked on her words. Goddamnit (no, mom, Guinai was to blame! Wait, actually, no, don’t scold her-), that image flashed before her eyes again, ew…

She forced a casual laugh, and gestured to her sword. “Getting… exercise! I got this sword from my ma, and it’s reallyheavy, so I’m still getting used to wielding it - even though I’ve had it my entire life… Oh, anyway, I usually run laps around the ship with it, and-” The man was still smiling, but Sushang felt as though she would crumble under his gaze. “…Yeah!”

“I see.” The look in his eyes was as undecipherable as the characters in the reports that Sushang had to write. “I think you should stop and rest for the day. After all…” He let out an unceremonious yawn. “It is getting rather late, don’t you think?”

“Y-yes, sir!”

Jing Yuan watched the girl leave as she appeared - in jingles and a hurry. The direction that Li Sushang came from… Yes, he had no doubt about it. Jing Yuan would need to keep an even closer watch on this merchant.

Luocha scowled. “Fuck you mean, ‘nuh uh’? I’ve already sanitized the coffin three times, now get going or we’ll be late.”

The entity growled from under the bed and sent out thorny vines to stab Luocha’s arm.

“For the last time, I did not cum inside the coffin!"

if you recognize my writing on reddit then buddy you really need to go touch grass

#leaft the doc #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #hsr luocha x reader #hsr smut (real)

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