#I'd have to make 70$ a month for both of them

[starrysharks]

these questions are pretty similar so i'll answer both at once.

to buy from a chinese indie brand, you need two things: the brand's taobao link and a proxy site account. taobao is a chinese storefront (?) that most of these stores are hosted on. there are plenty of western stores online that also carry taobao brand clothing - like arcana archive, glitch cupids, and pixie rebels - but i would recommend just getting your stuff from a proxy as those stores often up the prices of the clothes.

note that it can be a bit of a struggle to get the taobao link of a store, especially if you don't have an account (which is notoriously difficult to get these days), but i did find some link lists! (mostly lolita stuff as that's what taobao is most popular for among alt fashionistas ^_^)

some other brands that i recommend -

eyeelike - y2k inspired, though their stock is usually very limited. sizes up to UK 10-12 (L) i believe

link (lemme know if it's broken):

frufru - bright, colorful, sorta harajuku-esque! i heavily recommend their star messenger bags, been wanting to get one of my own for a while ^_^

link

and hbreaker - a more visual kei sort of thing! more edgy than the other two stores, but i'm yet to check it out properly

link

so, now that you have the link, you need a proxy site. this is so that you can send the clothes over from china to your own country. in the past, i would've recommended pandabuy, but it died a few months ago due to illegal replica selling. for that, i'd recommend avoiding proxies that allow replicas, because they might go under while you're trying to get clothes shipped. (that happened to me T_T)

some that are reliable are:

sugargoo

superbuy

spreenow

now all you do is use the search bar (make sure it's on the "shop" mode rather than "product"), and plug in the link to the shop you want to buy from, and it should be the first result. get all your clothes, and now all you have to do is have them shipped out! shipping usually costs a lot (£20+ from my experience) and if you're buying a haul, it can be over £200 for just 4-6 items, so i'd recommend only buying stuff you KNOW you're going to wear often and enjoy. shipping should only take 2-3 weeks (at least in my experience - i live in the UK, it might take more time in the US.) and boom! now you can dress like those cool girls on xiaohongshu!

there are also two western stores i'd like to go over that have similar clothes - sixth dimension and minga london.

sixth dimension has many good qualities - they have more inclusive sizing (up to UK XL), reasonable prices based on their quality, and they restock and do sales often. i heavily recommend them if you can't afford the high shipping prices or if the sizing is too limited for you!

unfortunately, i have less nice things to say about minga london. they're highly extortionate in terms of pricing - i've seen shein quality cardigans sold for upwards of £70, for example. they do drops often, and have been accused of fast fashion but i'm not sure if that's legit or not. they've also stolen designs in the past. however, they do have inclusive sizing, up to XXXL. i'd recommend only buying from them if they're doing a sale, or if you literally have no other choice.

now regarding fruits mag - unfortunately, you can't buy from them. fruits mag is a japanese magazine that went over a variety of different street styles, so if you want to buy from fruits, you'd have to buy from the brands that the people in the magazines are wearing. as fruits was most popular in the 2000s, most of those brands are defunct...however, i do have some recommendations for japanese alternative brands!

alice and the pirates - popular lolita fashion. pretty good sizing i think, and they do worldwide shipping too iirc.

baby the stars shine bright - same as aatp, but more "cutesy".

acdc rag - yami kawaii type clothes with inclusive sizing.

dearmylove - jirai kei/dark girly clothing and beautiful shoes. inclusive sizing, i'm pretty sure they have a full plus size range! also collabed with needy streamer overdose lol

liz lisa - lolita/mori kei/girly styles and pretty coats. quite expensive tho...

moi-meme-moitie - the brand of malice mizer's guitarist mana-sama! gothic lolita. i'm not sure about sizing or prices.

6%dokidoki - yume kawaii and decora style. very colorful! i'm not sure about sizing.

angel blue - japanese kids clothing, usually worn in general kawaii and jojifuku styles. as it's for kids, the sizing is NOT inclusive at all, UK size S-M at the most from what i've seen. usually you can only find resellers on depop, but the pricing usually isn't horrible.

other than brands, i'd recommend looking for clothes thrifting on and offline (hit big city thrift stores for better chances of alt clothing), buying accessories from verified etsy sellers, and just looking around the house for anything you can turn into an accessory or part of an outfit! i hope this post helps you though!

[ttrpg-smash-pass-vs]

I don't know exactly how to word it but as a kinky mother fucker and as someone who is a concept artist/character designer... these polls seem to highlight fatphobia in an interesting way.. both in the way that the "undesirable" monsters (ie the ones that are made to be "gross" like decomposing or the like) often have fat/bellies on them. but the ones that are more classically "desirable" are depicted either skinny or muscular. And typically the votes reflect this. the even more interesting moments are when the votes don't reflect that and the fatter monsters are proven to be desirable despite the seeming intent to be undesirable or grotesque. much to think about...

With the way the decomposing ones are proportioned it's meant to evoke a bloating corpse, with those in particular (like the venom troll) I think it might be uncanny valley. Now it's definitely true that fatter creatures generally do worse, just look at ones like hill giant. But I'd argue the vast majority of the apparent fatphobia around here is on WotC. and the rest has been blocked from the blog.

Firstly because many people enjoy larger entries, just as many enjoy smaller ones. The ones that do poorly are typically also partnered with 1000 other traits people might find undesirable. I'd point the fatphobia at WotC constantly depicting it alongside cruelty, greed, stupidity, stench, etc. People's biases, at least from the notes, seem to be largely with the other traits WotC likes to pair with size more than the size itself. As for the rest, I'd still hesitate to point fatphobia at the general viewer. Maybe a bit of unconscious cultural bias, but we're dealing in private preferences here. A preference toward the large, tall, short, brunette, hair style, type of socks, personality, etc, that's not the issue imo. Fatphobia's in how you treat people, in your biases and assumptions, not your internal sexual preferences. I think the views actually reflect that nicely, as the NICE large monsters ones have still gotten into the 70's. Which is HUGE, that's where medusa, mindflayers, and lot of classic monsterfucking creatures have ended up. Once we passed like 1000 people, very few humanoids could breech 80's, so grading on a curve there are larger ones effectively getting a B or low A. At that point the rest is usually explained by "being too monstrous/the viewer prefers women and the example given is male." And I'm saying this as someone who is obese, I have been mistaken for being quite pregnant. Gained a lot after my accident reduced my mobility 2 years ago, and the binge eating from the following depression. working it down though, I've been hovering around 220 (100 kg) for a bit recently but I'm slowly dropping again. Which is still pretty heavy at my height, though my vitals are all very good so I don't really care much. Now there are some people who just are fatphobic, and I felt no remorse about blocking the few people who were being dicks about it. But it's usually just in the other horrible traits WotC gave them or just not being into that. I'm not getting onto people for not preferring my body shape, just for insulting it or mistreating others over it. I think monsterfuckers are better about this than the general populace.

...and yes I took 2 months to respond to this. but have finally decided to chuck it out but make it unrebloggable. because I don't want this to breech into tumblr at large and attract too much attention from the average tumblite.

[dangerpronebuddie]

hi maggie 🥰

70 for the 100 kiss prompts please!!

Hi Nolan 🥰

I loved this one! Hope you like it darling 💕

Kiss Me Once Cause You Know I Had A Long Night 30/?

70. An accidental kiss that confuses you both, but only a moment passes before you crash your lips back against each other's

Summary:

“Actions speak louder than words,” Eddie shrugs. “Goodnight,” he smiles, leaning in for a quick kiss.

“Night,” Buck says softly, meeting him in the middle.

Wait a minute.

Eddie pulls back like he's been shocked. And he has. In way more ways than one.

(read below!)

They're sitting on Eddie's couch, talking over some (admittedly dull) action movie Chim recommended, one night they both managed to have free.

Eddie had ended things with Marisol at the makeshift wedding in the hospital, and hasn't been eager to "get back out there." He still doesn't know why he decided then was the best time, but it was for the best. When you spend the entire day wishing you could marry your best friend and not your girlfriend, there's something wrong with the relationship.

Buck and Tommy had decided to stay friends, and the three of them still got together often for fights or a beer, (no basketball. Not again), and Buck hasn't jumped back into dating yet.

And, with Chris being the social butterfly Eddie never was, the kid was at yet another sleepover, leaving Buck and Eddie without any plans.

So, pizza and about three beers later, Buck is deciding whether to stay the night. Something he hasn't done in months. Not since he came to Eddie after the lightning.

“Come on, do you really want to drive home at one in the morning?” Eddie reasons. He pretends his reasons for offering the couch are noble. They're actually… kinda pathetic. Be in love with your best friend and try to keep your dignity, or your sanity.

Buck smiles and sips his beer. “If I didn't know any better I'd say you've missed me.”

I always miss you when you go, Eddie doesn't say. “Oh yeah. I don't know how I manage to sleep without your snoring as a lullaby,” he says instead, tugging on a curl behind Buck's ear.

Buck gently elbows him in the ribs. “If that's your way to convince me…”

“I never said my negotiation techniques were good,” Eddie shrugs.

“They're terrible,” Buck scoffs, earning himself an elbow to the ribs right back. He giggles and ducks his head with a smile, pulling his lower lip between his teeth. “Okay, I'll stay. Wouldn't want you to have to sleep without my snoring as your white noise machine.”

“What do you know? My negotiation techniques worked!” Eddie grins.

Buck rolls his eyes and shoves at his shoulder. “I will never admit it.”

“Actions speak louder than words,” Eddie shrugs. “Goodnight,” he smiles, leaning in for a quick kiss.

“Night,” Buck says softly, meeting him in the middle.

Wait a minute.

Eddie pulls back like he's been shocked. And he has. In way more ways than one.

He has no idea what made him do it.

Maybe the box holding his feelings for Buck had finally exploded. Maybe his brain got up the courage without telling him the plan. Maybe it was the easy affection they'd been exchanging recently. Shoulder touches, lingering hugs, knees pressed together in the engine or on the couch.

Maybe it was just Buck.

Either way, Eddie feels like he's been struck by lightning again.

Judging by the wide eyed stare he's getting from Buck, he's at least not alone in his confusion.

“Eds,” Buck whispers, glancing at Eddie's lips.

“I'm sor-”

Buck surges forward, stealing the words from his lips and cupping his cheek. Eddie sighs into the kiss and melts against him, reaching up to card his fingers through soft curls.

Buck grips Eddie's hips, nudging him until he gets the message. Eddie throws a leg over Buck and straddles him, never once breaking their kiss.

He has no idea what's happening. But there's no way he's going to stop it.

Buck slips his hands beneath Eddie's henley, splaying his palms on his ribs as he teases the seam of his lips apart. Eddie makes a soft noise as Buck licks into his mouth. He tangles his fingers in Buck's curls and settles more firmly in his lap.

They kiss until the need for oxygen separates them. Eddie rests his forehead against Buck's. Buck traces nonsensical patterns on Eddie's lower back.

“Guess actions really do speak louder than words,” Buck smirks. Eddie kisses the expression off his face.

“Stay,” Eddie whispers, and it feels right. Asking Marisol to stay always made something sour twist in his gut.

All he feels now is butterflies, giddy and fizzy like champagne.

“That was the plan,” Buck says with a cheeky grin.

“Stay,” Eddie says again, pouring everything it's too soon to say into the word.

I want you, stay. Don't sleep on the couch, stay. I love you, stay.

Buck presses a soft kiss to his lips, just like their first kiss and yet somehow completely different. “Okay. I'll stay. For as long as you want me.”

“Forever,” Eddie whispers before kissing him again.

From 100 kiss prompts

[antimony-medusa]

MCYT on Ao3 - February '24

The state of MCYT on Ao3, just for fun. Yes I do this every month, I like numbers.

The Cube SMP (8 works)

Slamacow Minecraft Animations (Web Series) (10 works)

iDots SMP (23 works)

30 Day SMP | Free Trial SMP (27 works)

Legacy SMP (27 works)

Cogchamp SMP (29 works)

Content SMP (30 works)

Epic SMP (34 works)

Art of Survival SMP (36 works)

Dominion SMP (40 works)

Tiredtwt (Video Blogging RPF) (42 works)

Showtime SMP (48 works)

Shady Oaks SMP (49 works)

X Life SMP (51 works)

100 Hours Hardcore SMP (55 works)

IvoryCello's Prison Escapes (Web Series) (56 works)

Bear SMP (59 works)

SadSMP (66 works)

My Inner Demons - Aphmau (Web Series) (70 works)

Mer SMP (84 works)

Area Unknown SMP (88 works)

Kaboodle SMP (94 works)

Tortillaland SMP (115 works)

House Builder Gang SMP | HBG SMP (151 works)

Slimecicle Cinematic Universe (Web Series) (174 works)

New Life SMP (177 works)

WitchCraft SMP (190 works)

Rats SMP (238 works)

Pirates SMP (233 works)

SMPLive (299 works)

SMPEarth (318 works)

Mianite (Web Series) (386 works)

Afterlife SMP (402 works)

Outsiders SMP (413 works)

MindCrack RPF (505 works)

MyStreet - Aphmau (Web Series) (567 works)

Evolution SMP (713 works)

Karmaland SMP (857 works)

Minecraft Diaries - Aphmau (Web Series) (964 works)

Fable SMP (1,072 works)

Origins SMP (1,594 works)

Lifesteal SMP (1,607 works)

The Yogscast (3,220 works)

Empires SMP (6,596 works)

QSMP | Quackity SMP (8,104 works)

3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series (10,894 works)

Hermitcraft SMP (20,809 works)

Dream SMP (84,460 works)

Minecraft (Video Game) (110,435 works)

Video Blogging RPF (282,935 works)

Some notes

A new fandom this month! Showtime SMP is new, bringing this up to 49 tags that I track.

Fics are still primarily in english, but we have three exceptions with significant spanish fics. Karmaland (750 of 857 are in spanish, from 740 last month), Tortillaland (109 of 115 are in spanish, down from 110 last month), and QSMP (827 of 8104 are in spanish, from 752 last month.)

QSMP also shows 43 fics in French, up from 39 last month, and 452 in Brasilian Portugese, up from 405 last month. While I did not check every language this month, I checked on the languages I knew had a fic in QSMP and we see 1 fic in ASL (probably a misclick as it appears to be in english), 1 fic in Bahasa Malaysia, 1 fic in Dansk (Danish), 1 fic in Deutsch (German), 1 fic in Esperanto, 1 fic in Filipino, 5 works in European Portugese, 2 fics in Polski (Polish), 7 fics in Русский (Russian) (up from 5 last month), 1 fic in Suomi (Finnish), 1 fic in Svenska (Swedish), 1 fic in Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese), and 3 fics in 中文-普通话 國語 (Mandarin Chinese, I believe). While a 한국어 (Korean) speaker was recently added to the QSMP, there are currently no fics in 한글 (written Korean).

In the small and micro-sized fandoms, several of the smaller fandoms posted a decrease, including Legacy SMP, Bear SMP, and Area Unknown. HBG, on the other hand, posted a frankly impressive 16-fic increase, and both New Life and Witchcraft saw a 8-fic increase.

In the mid-sized fandoms, the showstopper was Minecraft Diaries, which went up a staggering 140 fics, which makes me suspect a sub-tag got wrangled into them. Pirates SMP and Outsiders SMP both saw 20 fic increases, and Mystreet saw an increase of 24 fics.

In the post-canon big fandoms, Empires went up by 188 works, which is an increase on both January's 178 and December's 117, but not beating November's 240. Dream SMP's increase of 591 works is the single lowest number I've seen since I've started tracking tags, being exceeded by both January's 918 and December's 767, which were the first months I'd seen the increase being lower than a thousand. 3rd Life, now that we're outside of a season, posted a respectable 558 fics, down from last month's record high of 831.

In the currently airing big fandoms, Hermitcraft saw that new-season boom, as it posted 716 fics, not as high as January's 784 (holiday exchanges), but beating both December and November's 574 and 651. QSMP posted 729 fics this month, which is part of a four-month decline (865 last month, 894 the month before, 913 the month before), but is still the fandom with the single biggest increase over a month. Incidentally, that means that Dream SMP is beat by both Hermitcraft and QSMP this month, and 3rd life is close behind it.

Overall, the number of fics posted under Video Blogging-RPF (the umbrella fandom that contains all MCYT), is 3,513 fics, down from January's 4,223, December's 3,489, and November's 4,035. Incidentally, it's very close to what we saw last year at the same time, as February '23 saw a VB RPF increase of 3,674.

Detailed breakdown under the cut.

The Cube SMP (8 works, 8 last month, 0-fic increase)

Slamacow Minecraft Animations (Web Series) (10 works, 10 last month, 0-fic increase)

iDots SMP (23 works, 23 last month, 0-fic increase)

30 Day SMP | Free Trial SMP (27 works, 27 last month, 0-fic increase)

Legacy SMP (27 works, 28 last month, 1-fic decrease)

Cogchamp SMP (29 works, 29 last month, 0-fic increase)

Content SMP (30 works, 30 last month, 0-fic increase)

Epic SMP (34 works, 32 last month, 2-fic increase)

Art of Survival SMP (36 works, 36 last month, 0-fic increase)

Dominion SMP (40 works, 38 last month, 2-fic increase)

Tiredtwt (Video Blogging RPF) (42 works, new tag this month)

Showtime SMP (48 works, new tag this month)

Shady Oaks SMP (49 works, 49 last month, 0-fic increase)

X Life SMP (51 works, 51 last month, 0-fic increase)

100 Hours Hardcore SMP (55 works, 54 last month, 1-fic increase)

IvoryCello's Prison Escapes (Web Series) (56 works, 56 last month, 0-fic incrase)

Bear SMP (59 works, 60 last month, 1-fic decrease)

SadSMP (66 works, 66 last month, 0-fic increase)

My Inner Demons - Aphmau (Web Series) (70 works, 67 last month, 3-fic increase)

Mer SMP (84 works, 82 last month, 2-fic increase)

Area Unknown SMP (88 works, 89 last month, 1-fic decrease)

Kaboodle SMP (94 works, 91 last month, 3-fic increase)

Tortillaland SMP (115 works, 115 last month, 0-fic increase)

House Builder Gang SMP | HBG SMP (151 works, 135 last month, 16-fic increase)

Slimecicle Cinematic Universe (Web Series) (174 works, 174 last month, 0-fic increase)

New Life SMP (177 works, 169 last month, 8-fic increase)

WitchCraft SMP (190 works, 182 last month, 8-fic increase)

Rats SMP (238 works, 234 last month, 4-fic increase)

Pirates SMP (233 works, 213 last month, 20-fic increase)

SMPLive (299 works, 294 last month, 5-fic increase)

SMPEarth (318 works, 304 last month, 14-fic increase)

Mianite (Web Series) (386 works, 379 last month, 7-fic increase)

Afterlife SMP (402 works, 395 last month, 7-fic increase)

Outsiders SMP (413 works, 393 last month, 20-fic increase)

MindCrack RPF (505 works, 504 last month, 1-fic increase)

MyStreet - Aphmau (Web Series) (567 works, 543 last month, 24-fic increase)

Evolution SMP (713 works, 693 last month, 20-fic increase)

Karmaland SMP (857 works, 842 last month, 15-fic increase)

Minecraft Diaries - Aphmau (Web Series) (964 works, 824 last month, 140-fic increase)

Fable SMP (1,072 works, 1,012 last month, 60-fic increase)

Origins SMP (1,594 works, 1,575 last month, 19-fic increase)

Lifesteal SMP (1,607 works, 1,546 last month, 62-fic increase)

The Yogscast (3,220 works, 3,215 last month, 5-fic increase)

Empires SMP (6,596 works, 6,408 last month, 188-fic increase)

QSMP | Quackity SMP (8,104 works, 7,375 last month, 729-fic increase)

3rd Life | Last Life SMP Series (10,894 works, 10,336 last month, 558-fic increase)

Hermitcraft SMP (20,809 works, 20,093 last month, 716-fic increase)

Dream SMP (84,460 works, 85,051 last month, 591-fic increase)

Minecraft (Video Game) (110,435 works, 110,119 last month, 316-fic increase)

Video Blogging RPF (282,935 works, 279,422 last month, 3,513-fic increase)

[skarsjoy]

15 years ago today - (09.09.09)

Swedish actor Alexander Skarsgård plays the powerful vampire Eric on HBO's series True Blood. His Guest DJ set was emotional and revealing as he chose to dedicate each of his five songs to people that play an important part in his life -- including his father, actor Stellan Skarsgard, a lost love and an old friend. True Blood's Season 2 finale airs September 13.

For More: True Blood, Season 2

Tracks Rolling Stones: Mothers Little Helper Ebba Grön: 800 °C The Buzzcocks: Ever Fallen in Love Van Morrison: Brown Eyed Girl Iggy Pop: The Passenger

Transcript:

Anne Litt: Hi, I am Anne Litt and I am here with the actor Alexander Skarsgard who stars in the popular vampire drama series True Blood on HBO. He plays the powerful vampire Eric. Today, we will be playing excerpts of songs he has selected that have inspired him over the years as part of KCRW'S Guest DJ Project.

Alex, what did you bring us today?

Alexander Skarsgard: I brought 5 songs that I'd want to dedicate to people – five people that play or have played an important part in my life.

AL: What a great idea. Let's start with Rolling Stones "Mother's Little Helper"

AS: I spent a week at my Dad's country house in southern Sweden. His grandfather built that house 9 years ago and my dad, it's very important to him to maintain it like the way it was built, to preserve it and not to modernize it too much. So, there is no running water there. If you want to take a shower you have to go out to the well and pump up water and pour it over yourself. When I was a kid, me and my Dad would go out and pump up water, pour it over each other and sing this song. So I want to dedicate this song to my old man and I want to thank him for not building a jacuzzi out there or an infinity pool or anything like that.

Song: Rolling Stones" Mother's Little Helper

AS: At the time , I didn't know a word of English but it didn't stop me from shouting, ‘ra pa doo pa da da dee…' I just made up jibberish but it was just a beautiful thing to share with my Dad singing that song. I couldn't care less what we were saying."

AL: That was the Rolling Stones, "Mother's Little Helper." I am here with Alex Skarsgard on KCRW's Guest DJ Project. What's the next dedication?

AS: When I was a teenager I was a punk rocker. This was in the early 90's and it was like 15 years after it was cool to be a punk rocker. Everyday after school I would bring my boombox out to this park and I would sit there with my friends singing and watch the sunset and listen to loud, angry, fast music. One of my best friends from back then, he's sick. He's been in and out of the hospital for a couple of years now. This is like an old Swedish punk song from the late 70's that I would like to dedicate to him. I hope he gets better soon so we can get a chance to drink cheap beer and bitch about the decay of our civilization. This is Ebba Grön (dedicates it to his friend in Swedish)

Song: Ebba Grön's 800 °C

AS: I was kind of a half ass punk rocker. I didn't go full punk. Ebba Grön started the Swedish punk wave in the mid-70's so this was 15 years after that but we loved this band and listened to them all the time.

AL: Are they still around?

AS: They're not but they are still very, very famous in Sweden. I still love them and think they are an amazing band.

AL: I am Anne Litt from KCRW and we are here with Alex Skarsgard. This is KCRW's Guest DJ Project and the next song I want to talk about is the Buzzcocks' "Ever Fallen in Love."

AS: Yeah, I had this girlfriend awhile ago, many years ago, and it was a very passionate relationship. I was very much in love with this girl, but after a few months we both realized we weren't good for each other. But it was one of those relationships that we didn't make each other happy, but every time we broke up, we ended up back together and that went on for almost 3 years. I don't know if you've experienced that, but it just killed me. It was really, really tough. I just tried to move on and so did she but we just couldn't. I want to dedicate this song to her and I hope she found happiness somewhere out there.

Song: Buzzcocks' "Ever Fallen in Love"

AS: Every time after a fight I would just put on my big headphones and I would crank up the volume and go Pete Shelley freakin' gets it. In a way she will always be a part of me, but I don't have to listen to Buzzcocks and cry every day and night any more. I can actually listen to it now and enjoy it because it's a great song.

AL: It's the Buzzcocks," Ever Fallen in love". We're here with Alex Skarsgard from the HBO series, True Blood, on KCRW's Guest DJ Project. What's the next song you have for us?

AS: When I was a kid we went on a lot of road trips and my mom had this song that she always wanted to play. She is a very considerate person, my mom, so she would always ask the kids and my Dad if it was okay if she played the song. Like I mentioned before, I was a punk rocker so I would just shrug my shoulders and be like ‘oh whatever, I don't care.' So I want to dedicate this song -- my mom's favorite song --to her and I want her to know that even though I would never admit it at the time, I actually loved it every time she put it on.

Song: Van Morrison's "Brown Eyed Girl"

AL: Do you ever feel homesick?

AS: Yeah.

AL: Is there a piece of music that you hear that just takes you there?

AS: It's kind of tough because I am the only one in my family here in LA. The rest of my family lives in Sweden so music is great for that. I just put on a song and it brings me right back home.

AL: That was Van Morrison's Brown Eyed Girl. This is the KCRW'S Guest DJ Project. I'm Anne Litt with Alex Skarsgard who has brought in a whole bunch of great songs and the next one is "The Passenger" by Iggy Pop. Tell us about that one.

AS: I've been in LA for five years now, on and off. Growing up in Stockholm, Sweden that transition, it's not easy because Stockholm is a very densely populated place, you walk or you ride your bike. Most of my friends are within just a few blocks away from each other and coming out here was kind of tricky. Suddenly you're in a city where it's considered normal to sit in traffic for 45 minutes for coffee with a friend or people drive Hummers to the gym so I've kind of spent five years complaining about LA and talking about how much greater Stockholm is, how good it is back there. I was just there for two weeks and when I landed I flew into LAX and I had this really weird feeling when we touched ground. I felt like I was coming home. I've never felt that before so this last song I actually want to dedicate to Los Angeles and I hate to admit it but I think I'm falling in love.

Song: "The Passenger," by Iggy Pop

AL: Nobody is going to let you get out of here today without telling us what music Eric listens to.

AS: He listens to a lot of Swedish death metal.

AL: Is it hard to talk with those things in your mouth?

AS: The fangs?

AL: Yeah

AS: Yeah, you know, it takes a while to get used to it.

AL: Are they like those things you used to get on Halloween?

AS: Well, they're not plastic they're like molded for your teeth but it's basically the same thing.

AL: Alex, thanks so much for joining us on KCRW.com, you've shared such a meaningful group of songs

AS: Thank you so much for having me, it was a true pleasure

AL: For a complete track listing and to find these songs online, go to KCRW.com/GuestDJProject

photo by Chris Maluszynski (photo shoot for DN Söndag, August 2009) taken in Shreveport, LA, while filming Straw Dogs

[willalove75]

Keeley bring the biggest shipper of Rebecca and reader ☺️

Love this! Thank you so much for the request!💕💕

"Hi babe! . . . My day has been going very well, how's training been? . . . Really? Well that's not surprising. . . I would love to go to dinner tonight! . . . 7? . . . Perfect! . . . See you tonight, I love you!"

Keeley hangs up the phone and you look over her as you lay across the couch in her office. A small blush creeps across her cheeks as she looks down at her phone, smitten with the conversation you presume she just had with Roy.

"You two are so fucking cute."

"Oh stop." Cocking your eyebrow at her, she reconsiders her statement. "I guess we are pretty fucking cute, aren't we?"

"Uh, yeah?! I forget how much I hate being single until I see you two together."

"We should find you someone!"

"Where? On Bantr? No thanks, I've had a lifetime of shitty Bantr dates in less than six months, I'm good."

"Okay, then how about a bar or a club?!"

"I don't know, I hate going out to clubs and I can't imagine I'd find anyone at a bar that isn't looking for a one night stand."

"Hmm..." Keeley hums as she thinks. She pulls out her phone and starts scrolling. "You're looking for a girlfriend, yeah?"

"Yup."

"Any preferences?"

"Not really, I mean I like tall women, blond or brunette I guess, I don't know."

Keeley's eyes widen and she stops scrolling.

"How about age?"

"I mean, I'm not dating someone who's like, 70, or like, 21. Preferably someone at least my age."

"But you don't care if they're older than you?"

"No, not really."

"Keeley Jones you are brilliant." She says to herself. "I can't believe I didn't think of this before!"

"What are you talking about?"

"I know the perfect, mature woman for you. Tall, blond, fit as fuck, she's older than you but I think you two would be perfect for each other."

"Who?"

Keeley turns her phone and you see a picture of Rebecca on her screen.

"You're fucking with me, right?"

"No! You two would be so great together!"

"Keeley! Rebecca?! She is so far out of my league it's embarrassing."

"She is not! Plus, I know she's also been looking for someone and you two already get on great."

"Don't get me wrong, Rebecca is amazing, but why on earth would she want to date me?"

"First of all, you're fit as fuck and you're mature well beyond your years. Secondly, you'd be surprised, Rebecca's taste in women is not what you would expect. Come on, let me at least set you two up on a date!"

"Double date, with you and Roy."

"He'll hate that, but deal!"

"Now shoo, I have some calls to make!" Keeley says, pulling up Rebecca's contact info and calling her.

You head back into your office and plop down into your chair. Keeley is setting you up on a date with Rebecca?! What is happening?!

About 15 minutes later Keeley waltzes into your office with a shit-eating grin on her face.

"Tomorrow night, 6pm!"

"She said yes?"

"Of course she did!"

"Keeley did you tell her who you were setting her up with?"

"Oh look at the time, I have to run!" She says, dashing out of your office.

"Keeley!!"

The following night you, Keeley and Roy get to the restaurant and are seated at your table. Keeley and Roy sit next to each other, leaving Rebecca's seat open next to you. Keeley's face lights up when she see's Rebecca walk into the restaurant.

"She's hereee!" Keeley says.

The knots in your stomach contract, you don't think you've ever been this nervous for a date before. Especially since you know who your date is, but for Rebecca, it's a blind date. You're terrified she's going to see you and laugh out loud and leave. Keeley gets up and pulls Rebecca into a big hug. After taking a deep breath, Roy gives you a nod and you stand up, turning towards the both of them.

"Rebecca, you know y/n, your beautiful date for the night. Y/n, you know Rebecca!"

To your surprise, you think you see Rebecca's face light up when she sees you. A beautiful smile crosses her face and you quickly look her up and down, admiring how her dress perfectly flaunts every curve on her body.

"Y/n, well this is a wonderful surprise!" She says, pulling you into a hug.

You swear you feel like your heart is about to jump out of your chest when you feel her against you.

"You look beautiful." You shyly say.

Rebecca smiles at you, looking into your eyes for a moment.

"Thank you love, you look beautiful as well."

A faint blush crosses your cheeks and the three of you take your seats.

"So was this a blind date for you as well y/n, or was I the only one Keeley was trying to surprise?" Rebecca asks, playfully side-eyeing Keeley.

"I didn't know she didn't tell you until after she already made the plans yesterday." You say.

"Why am I not surprised?" She says with a laugh. "But I was pleasantly surprised to see you, so it seemed to work out pretty well if I do say so myself." She says, flashing a smile your way.

"You two are going to get married, I already know it." Keeley says, matter-of-factly. Rebecca rolls her eyes at her and Keeley continues. "What? I'm serious! I can't believe I didn't think of this before! You two are perfect for each other, just you wait. I know I'm right!"

Both you and Rebecca laugh at Keeley's antics and smile at each other. God she is so beautiful. Her green eyes draw you in, it's hard for you to look away. You finally peel your eyes away from hers before you stare for too long and make it awkward.

Throughout dinner the four of you laugh and chat, you get to know Rebecca a lot better and she gets to learn more about you. The more you learn about her, the more you're inclined to think that Keeley might be right about you two suiting each other.

Keeley tells an embarrassing story of you from when you two were at University together.

"Keeley oh my god no!" You laugh and cover your face with your hands, hiding away from everyone.

"What?! It was too funny, even you think it's hysterical!" She laughs.

"Oh it's okay!" Rebecca laughs as she wraps her arm around you, pulling you into her a little to comfort you. Peeking up, your eyes meet Rebecca's and she playfully scrunches her nose at you. "Holy shit she's so cute." you think to yourself.

The rest of dinner is filled with more laughter and good conversation. Rebecca sneaks off and pays the bill and the four of you decide to walk around a bit after dinner, not quite ready to end the night.

As the four of you walk in pairs down the street, Keeley is walking alongside Roy, their fingers intertwined, and you're walking next to Rebecca. Looking back towards Keeley you don't see the crack in the sidewalk and you trip. Before you're able to fall, Rebecca grabs you and keep you steady.

"Are you okay?" Rebecca asks, you hear the concern in her voice and it makes you swoon a little.

"Yeah, I'm good, I didn't see that. Thank you for saving my ass." You say with a laugh.

"Good, I'm glad you're not hurt." She says with a smile. Her hand travels down your arm and finds yours. A light blush crosses your cheeks as you feel her fingers slide between yours.

The two of you gently hold hands for the rest of the walk, neither of you realizing that Roy and Keeley fell a little ways behind you, giving the two of you some privacy as you chat.

Making your way back to the restaurant, the four of you regroup and talk a little before heading home.

"I must say, this was probably the best blind date I've ever been on." Rebecca says, smiling at you.

"Agreed, even though it really wasn't a blind date for me." You say with a laugh.

"Much better than that last Bantr date you went on a few weeks ago, right?" Keeley asks you.

"Uh, yeah, like a thousand times better."

"Oh no, what happened there?" Rebecca asks.

"She was just fine, a bit of a wet blanket honestly."

"A bit?" Roy says. "She was fucking miserable. I wanted to jump into the river just to get away from her and we only met for five fucking minutes."

You roll your eyes at Roy, which definitely annoys him.

"The both of you have shit taste in dates. The last guy you were seeing that we went out with wasn't much better than that wet blanket." He says, looking at Rebecca. "What is wrong with the both of you? You both deserve someone who makes you feel like you've been stuck by fucking lightening. Don't you dare settle for less."

Both you and Rebecca stand there taking in what Roy just said, your fingers still intertwined.

"And for the record, I Keeley knocked this one out of the fucking park." He says, pointing between the two of you.

Keeley is beaming as you and Rebecca look at each other. She gently squeezes your hand and you smile up at her.

A few weeks go by and you and Rebecca have been on a couple of more dates. As Friday rolls around, you're looking forward to your date with Rebecca, she's coming over to your flat for the first time and you're planning on making her dinner. Just after lunch your cellphone starts ringing, you pull it out and see Rebecca's name on your screen.

"Hey!"

"Hi." You can immediately tell from the tone of her voice she's upset.

"Is everything okay?"

"I feel awful, but something came up and now I have to be stuck in the office all night. I'm so sorry, I was really looking forward to tonight."

You can't help but feel disappointed, but you also know how demanding her job is so you understand.

"Hey, it's okay, I get it, no worries at all. We'll just reschedule, okay?"

"Okay. I'm so sorry y/n."

"It's okay! I know it's not your fault."

"Thank you. I have to run, I'll call you later to reschedule?"

"Of course, and absolutely! Don't work too hard, you deserve to give yourself a break once in awhile."

She chuckles on the other end of the line. "I'll try to keep that in mind. I'll talk to you later, bye."

"Bye."

Sitting back in your chair, your phone is resting against your chin with a disappointed look on your face, you see Keeley walk in.

"Oi, what's with the sad face?"

"Oh, nothing, Rebecca had to cancel tonight."

"Oh I'm sorry babe, what happened?"

"She's gonna be stuck in the office because something came up. I feel bad, part of me just wants to show up and keep her company but I don't want to intrude."

"She would love that!"

"You think so? You don't think she would be annoyed if I just show up unannounced?"

"Not at all, I think she would be so excited! What were your original plans tonight?"

"I was gonna make us dinner at my flat."

"Babe you should take the date to her!"

"You think so?"

"Yes! Absolutely!"

"I'll think about it, thanks Keels."

As the day winds down you shoot Rebecca a text before you pack up your things.

How's is going over there?

Ugh.

That good huh? Lol

I'd much rather be getting ready to see you. I'm sorry again.

Hey, it's okay. I'd much rather be able to see you too but I understand. No worries, I promise.

You're amazing, you know that?

I can very easily say the same thing about you 😉

Cheeky.

Hehe 😜

Packing up your things with a smile on your face, you decide to follow Keeley's advice and take the date to her. After saying goodnight to everyone, you rush home and quickly whip up dinner. Tossing it into takeout containers and along with the bottle of wine you bought and a few cups and plastic cutlery, you put everything into a bag and head over to Nelson Road.

Walking into the building you're greeted by the security guard at the front.

"Hi, I'm here to see Rebecca."

"Do you have an appointment?"

"Uh, no. It's more of a surprise visit." You say, holding up the bag with a small smile.

The guard gives you a look.

"We had dinner plans, but she got caught up here, so, I decided to bring it to her." You say, shyly.

"Do you know how to get to her office?"

"Uh, I actually don't."

"Down that way, take the staircase on the left, her office is at the top of the stairs."

"Thank you."

Walking down the hall, you admire the display cases filled with Richmond's history. You get to the staircase and make your way up to her office.

Her office door is closed, you put your ear to the door to see if you can hear anything and although the noise is faint, you can hear her inside. Gently knocking on the door, you hear a "come in." She sounds a little annoyed, so you take a deep breath and slowly open the door.

Stepping into her office, Rebecca's face changes from a "who's bothering me right now?" look to a happily surprised look. Her usually pristine hair is pulled up into a messy ponytail, she had kicked her heels off and her legs are curled under her on her desk chair and her glasses are perched on the bridge of her nose.

"Y/n, what are you doing here?"

"I felt bad that you had to be here so late, and I figured you probably didn't eat yet, so I brought you dinner."

Walking up to her desk, you can see her eyes gloss over, as if no one has ever went out of their way for her like this before. She stands up and puts her glasses on her desk and walks over to you. Even without heels she still towers over you. Closing the distance between the two of you, Rebecca wraps her arms around you and pulls you in for probably one of the best hugs you've ever had in your life.

"Thank you." She says softly as she holds you.

"Of course."

Pulling apart just a little, Rebecca cups your face with one of her hands and looks into your eyes with wonder.

"What?"

"Nothing," she says, shaking her head. "it's just, no one has ever done something like this for me before."

"Are you serious? Never?"

"I don't think so, if anyone did, it was a very, very long time ago."

"Well anyone who had the opportunity to do something like this for you but didn't sucks. This is the least I could do to help make your day a little better."

"I adore you."

"I adore you as well Rebecca."

Looking into Rebecca's gorgeous green eyes, you find yourself getting lost in them. Everything around you disappears when you look into her eyes, you feel your heartbeat begin to race as you wrap your arms around her waist, pulling her closer to you. Rebecca bends down towards you and you close your eyes. A bolt of electricity shoots through your body when your lips finally meet for the first time, you truly feel like you've been struck by lightening. Her lips are soft and warm against yours, just like you had imagined them to be. Nothing about this kiss was disappointing to you, you almost never wanted it to end.

When your lips finally part you look into her eyes again with a smile on your face.

"You hungry?"

"Mhm."

She leads you to the couch and you pull out the takeout containers, the cups, cutlery and the wine from the bag.

"This smells amazing, what is it?"

"I made your favorite."

Rebecca looks at you with another look of surprise.

"You did?" She says in disbelief.

"Yes! You told me what it was a few weeks ago and I stored it in the back of my mind, so when we were talking about having dinner at my place I decided that's what I was going to make. And since we couldn't eat at my place tonight, I figured bringing our date to you was a close enough second option."

"You're amazing." She says, pulling you in for another kiss. Rebecca kisses you a little harder this time and you kiss her back, matching her energy. Her stomach growls and you two part before the kiss gets any steamier.

"Eat, I'm sure you're starving."

Rebecca opens the container and closes her eyes when she inhales.

"This smells wonderful."

"I hope it tastes as good as it smells." You say with a laugh.

She loads up her fork and brings the food to her lips, you see her pupils dilate when it makes contact with her tongue.

"Fuck me!" She says, covering her mouth.

A little taken back, you let out a giggle and you feel your cheeks blush.

"I guess that means you like it?" You playfully say.

"Mhm." She says as she chews. "This is fucking delicious. You made this?"

"Yup! I like to cook, I've never made this before, but I'm happy with how it came out." You say as you start to dig into your meal.

Picking the bottle of wine up from the table you gesture to Rebecca.

"Wine?"

"Fuck yes, please."

You giggle and pour the wine into two cups and hand Rebecca hers.

"What shall we cheers to?" You ask.

"To a wonderful date night, with my wonderful girlfriend."

Your heart leaps out of your chest for a moment.

"Your girlfriend?" You ask, a little in shock.

"Yes, well I'm not seeing anyone else, are you?"

"No, not at all."

"And I don't plan on seeing anyone else for a long time." She says with a smile.

"Neither do I." You smile back at her.

You cheers and take a sip of your drinks. The rest of the night is filled with laughter, a good meal, wine, and Rebecca still managed to get some work done. Even when she had you curl up into her lap while she sat at her desk.

Both you and Rebecca decided to keep the officialization of your relationship under wraps for a few weeks while you both got into a groove.

Keeley asked you to tag along to Richmond for a meeting, which you happily agreed to. Not only did you enjoy the people that worked there, you got to see Rebecca, which was always something you looked forward to.

The two of you walk into Rebecca's office and you see Roy, Ted, Higgins, Coach Beard, a couple of the players and Rebecca.

"Hello my favorite Richmond peeps!" Keeley says as you walk in.

"Hi!" You say, waving to everyone as you all greet each other.

Rebecca walks straight up to you and wraps her arms tightly around you, you both relax in the embrace. It's only been a couple of days since you last saw each other, but you both hate not being able to see each other every day.

"Hi love." She whispers as she holds you.

"I missed you." You whisper back.

When you two finally part you turn to see that everyone is staring at the two of you, Keeley with a shit-eating grin on her face. You feel your cheeks turning red and Rebecca looks down at you and sees you blushing. She wraps her arm around you and holds you close.

"Oh for fucks sake just admit it." Roy says, breaking the silence.

Rebecca rolls her eyes and looks at you, you nod at her with a smile on your face.

"Alright, fine, we're together. Happy?"

"YES!" Keeley screams. "I'm so fucking good at this!"

Most of the people in the room cheer and a few groan as a couple of the players hand money to those who were cheering.

"Did you guys seriously make bets on us?!" You ask.

"Fuck yeah," Roy says, taking money from Isaac. "it was easy money too."

"Well, I'm happy for ya boss, you two seem mighty smitten with each other." Ted says.

"I'd say so." She says, looking down at you.

"Me too."

Rebecca cups your face and kisses you in front of everyone, you feel your cheeks burning in her hand but you kiss her back as everyone cheers.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Hi, Tumblr!

So, I have severe anxiety and frequently go into disassociative episodes. I especially have an extreme aversion to driving. I also have OCD which makes me feel compelled to do things "equally" on both sides (i.e. taking one step with my right foot and taking one with my left, or, more relevantly, pressing on the gas for a certain amount of time and pressing the brake for the same amount).

Earlier this year, I was signed up for driving lessons, and proceeded to have panic attacks pretty much every day I had a lesson - it didn't help that my instructor was horrible. But I ended up completing it somehow, and I have my learner's permit now.

The AITA part comes in now. I've pretty much refused to drive for the last few months since I got my permit and my parents are beginning to get frustrated. I have to get 70 hours to get my license, 10 of them being at night, and so far I've gotten 0 of those hours. My parents keep telling me that I have to learn how to drive because I won't be able to survive where I live without one, and that they're getting older, so what if they need me to drive them someplace?

I feel like such an asshole for continuously refusing to drive, even on easy roads, and I feel like I should be able to do it since I already got my permit. But it's already been about 5 months and I feel like I've forgotten everything. My parents have even resorted to promising me a new cat if I get my license.

My parents are just trying to look out for me, and I keep refusing with hard "no"s. I think I might be making them worry. And I get that I have anxiety and all that, but I still feel horrible because I know they're right.

AITA? And also, I'd like to ask for advice on what to do if anyone has any advice or has experienced something similar.

What are these acronyms?

[redistrictgirl]

As of September 15th, 2024, Kamala Harris is slightly favored (66% chance) in the race for the presidency.

Repeat after me: Nothing Ever Happens.

In spite of a highly-watched and newsworthy debate that the Vice President is widely agreed to have won, there has barely been any budge in our topline and two of the three swing states with major probability shifts have actually moved towards Trump! There are two asterisks here in the lack of change, both of which are fairly minor in my opinion for the reasons below.

First, state-level polling has been scarce since the debate. What we have seen, ho-hum polls in the Rust Belt, don't inspire that much confidence that anything has changed. Second, our "bin" for this week does include some pre-debate polling! They don't affect the averages that much, though, only taking away three-tenths of a percentage point from Ms. Harris and one-tenth of a percentage point from Mr. Trump. That's meaningful in aggregate, but not seismic.

With that out of the way, let's take a look at the closest states:

Arizona (55% chance of being won by Trump) - Ms. Harris still has not led in a poll in this state for nearly three weeks. The asterisk here is that Mr. Trump still cannot break 50%, and there's a chance that his vote share is also declining (though we don't have enough polling to say for sure.) For now, this uncertainty as well as passable fundamentals for Democrats are enough to keep the state a tossup.

North Carolina (56% chance of being won by Trump) - This is one of the few instances where the fundamentals look rosier for Republicans than state-level polling. Shockingly, the Vice President is the first candidate to have hit 50% in about two weeks in this state, doing so in a Quinnipiac poll near the start of the week. There are plenty of fine polls for the former president, however, and I'd still expect some reversion to the mean in general, so he remains the favorite.

Georgia (66% chance of being won by Trump) - This week's Peach State polls have been very kind to Mr. Trump as he hovers around 49% decided, where Ms. Harris' share is more volatile. There haven't been many other interesting developments in the state.

Pennsylvania (69% chance of being won by Harris) - The perennial swing state continuing to hold strong for Democrats is a promising sign for them as the field of play slowly narrows. We don't have much data to work with, but the 49-46 Harris result from Morning Consult pre-debate is intriguing.

Nevada (70% chance of being won by Harris) - This state has seen positive developments for the former President alongside the rest of the Sun Belt this week, with polling from both Morning Consult and Redfield & Wilton (post-debate!) showing a neck-and-neck race. That said, there aren't too many undecided voters for either candidate to pick up in the state, so Harris will still be fairly comfortable here as long as she maintains an overall lead.

So do I think we're destined to spend the next few months in Lean D purgatory? Hardly. For one, as undecided voters make up their mind, we can expect more confidence in the model. Our sample size will also increase, which will make it easier for the model to pick up on smaller movement without outliers throwing things out of whack. That said, this is very much a close race, and even as Harris nears "Vegas favorite" territory of winning, upsets happen all the time!

[other-shades-of-sapphire]

How to get over a heartbreak – Hyunjin

Hyunjin x barista Jinsol, circa August 2023

While struggling amidst his post-breakup daze, Hyunjin found himself an unexpected helping hand.

There were plenty of reasons why Hyunjin loved being around Changbin, but one of the biggest was because the hyung never failed to make him laugh – which he desperately needed after his godawful breakup the week before. 

"Seriously, Hyunjin-ah?" he said when he went to inspect Hyunjin's room, like he said he would if he hadn't seen Hyunjin come out of it within the first twenty-four hours after the breakup. "Any more than this and I'd have to call the Department of Health and tell them that this room is chronically invested by some sort of a foreign pest." 

Hyunjin laughed at this. It was his first since he'd come home from his last ever date with his girlfriend – well, ex-girlfriend now, he supposed. 

"Seriously, Hyunjin-ah?" Changbin also said on the time when he spotted Hyunjin bringing in delivery boxes full of art supplies. "You've been overshopping art supplies for almost a month now. Have a look around your room – while you still can anyway, before it transforms into an overloaded art supplies storage and you can't really see anything anymore." 

Hyunjin also laughed at this, but he knew the hyung got a point. But how could he not keep buying art supplies when it was really the only remaining source of the scent that reminded him of his girlfriend – ex-girlfriend? 

She was an artist just like him, though a professional one at that; with an actual art degree working for an art museum while making art herself as a side gig. They'd often spent time making art together, him with his canvases and brushes and her with whatever tools she was feeling because she was an all-rounder who loved working with different tools and materials, from paint to fabric to clay to pretty much everything. Hence the permanent scent of art supplies on her, which honestly only made him love her even more. 

Despite the constant laughs Changbin was providing, Hyunjin knew he was starting to show some concerning behaviors. He also knew that both Chris and Minho had specifically asked Changbin to shadow Hyunjin for the time being and keep a careful eye on him. The younger hyung was doing a great job at it, to which Hyunjin felt grateful because who knew what other concerning behaviors he might do otherwise. And true to his suspicion, when Changbin left him unsupervised that one day, Hyunjin found himself going back to the café he used to frequent with his (ex)girlfriend. 

His heart panged at the oh-so-familiar ding of the small bell above the wooden-and-glass door he was pushing. He dragged his feet to the counter, meaning to just order an iced americano to go since he was already here anyway, but then found himself saying to the barista: "Flat white, but extra white." 

Another pang at his heart. It was her favorite drink, the same one she almost always ordered whenever they went here (which was often). Hyunjin remembered laughing at it the very first time he'd heard her order the unusual coffee. 

"What does that even mean?" 

She'd explained it to him as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Just a regular flat white, but instead of a 50:50 ratio between the espresso and milk, make it 60:40." 

"Doesn't that make it a latte, though? Why don't you just order a latte?" 

"It's very much not a latte, Hwang. A latte would be closer to 70:30, or 80:20 even. So it's a flat white, but extra white." 

It was a recurring argument between the two of them; he'd kept teasing her to just order a latte and she'd insisted that it was in fact not what she wanted, even after almost three years into their relationship. He missed arguing with her, he realized – as if it was not the most obvious thing in the world. He also missed how she called him Hwang whenever they're out in public. 

He also missed her. 

"You come alone and order her drink. You guys are not together anymore?" 

Hyunjin snapped out of his reverie at the comment. It came from the barista, the same one who'd taken his flat white, but extra white order. She was staring at him with a mildly curious look, a perfect balance between interest and indifference, through a mildly cold pair of black eyes. He raised an eyebrow. "You recognized the order?" 

The barista let out a snort. "Within my years working here, she's the only person who orders a flat white, but extra white, ever. Kind of hard not to remember. Also," she added after a second of pause, as if an afterthought, "within my years working here, you're one of the very few idols I've had as a customer. Kind of hard not to remember you, too." 

The second bit of her sentence surprised him. So she knew he was an idol, but had never done anything about it – not a nosy question, not a request for autograph or pictures, nada. That was rare. Also, "You have other idols coming here too?" 

"You're dodging my question," she pointed out – which, to be fair, Hyunjin did. "So you guys broke up, didn't you?" 

Hyunjin had a half mind to snap a mean "none of your business" retort, but then decided against. "Yeah," he simply said instead. 

Something on her cold pair of black eyes seemed to soften at his answer. "Come sit by the counter," she said. 

Hyunjin blinked. "Pardon?" 

"Come sit by the counter," the barista repeated patiently. "I've had my fair share of experience helping other people get over heartbreaks. I might be able to help you, too." 

"Who says I haven't gotten over the heartbreak yet?" 

Another snort, though this time it sounded more like a sigh. "Dude, you're here of all places, where you used to hang out with her, ordering the drink she used to order, of all the other drinks you could order. I think it's a fair guess." 

"Fair enough," he muttered. 

She made a gesture towards the empty high table next to the register. "Well?" 

The proposition sounded vague and Hyunjin wondered if he should be careful about it, but something about her – the softness in her eyes, the nonchalance in her gesture, even the deadpan of her tone – told him she was being genuine enough for him to trust her. So he decided to go with his heart rather than his head – something he hardly ever did, being a T for most of his life – and went to sit by the counter, waiting for the barista to finish his flat white, but extra white while thinking that if something happened, he had Changbin's number on his speed dial. 

"Okay," the barista said minutes later, setting down his coffee in front of him. "Do tell me, how bad is it?" 

"The flat white? I haven't tried it," Hyunjin said dryly, in his half-hearted attempt to crack a joke. 

She glared at him. "Ha ha, so funny. Meant the breakup, pretty boy." 

Hyunjin sipped his coffee – which, he had to admit albeit reluctantly, indeed sat just in between a regular flat white and a latte, just like his (ex)girlfriend insisted this whole time – before answering; just as an excuse to delay, because he really didn't have to think about the answer. "It was awful. There were lots of yelling it's like a screaming match. And the worst part of it is that it's nobody's fault, not really." He then proceeded to tell the barista about how his (ex)girlfriend had told him that she didn't think the two of them were going to work together because they're both artists and she needed someone with more stability to anchor her. It's a well-practiced story at this point, since he'd told it numerous times; to his members, his friends, his mother, his manager. 

The barista listened attentively the whole time, giving him genuine and well-timed nods and frowns, made a soft hissing sound when he was done. "It really sounds awful. And how are you now?" 

It was another well-practiced story because his members, his friends, his mother, and his manager had also asked him the very same question. Hyunjin gave the barista the same answer he gave the rest; he didn't think he's already fine at the moment, but he believed he would be soon. Just needed a little bit more time to adjust and ease back to life without his (ex)girlfriend. 

This time, the barista mostly gave him nods, seemingly understanding what he's going through. Maybe she had gone through a couple of heartbreaks herself so she could relate. "How was it?" she asked next, this time in a softer voice. "Your relationship with her?" 

The question took Hyunjin aback a little because none of his members, his friends, his mother, or his manager had asked him that. Primarily because they were there the entire time and Hyunjin had told them earful after earful of how their relationship was going as it was going, not post-breakup. He took a moment to take another sip of his coffee while considering his answer, then decided to start with, "It's amazing." 

He recalled how they'd first met at an art gallery, eyeing the same piece of painting. She'd been the first one to strike up a conversation, asking him his thought on the painting – which Hyunjin had shared all too happily because no one ever asked him such question before and he usually had tons of thoughts on art which he was more than willing to share with anyone. 

Her eye had gone impossibly wide at his answer. "No way, that's exactly what I thought too!" 

Hyunjin had called her bluff, saying she only said that to avoid sharing her real thought about the painting. She'd challenged him back, pulling him to the next painting and shared her interpretation of the art piece first – which, coincidentally, was also overly similar to what Hyunjin had thought himself. 

"See? I wasn't lying!" she'd said. "We really see these paintings through a similar point of view. How cute." 

Hyunjin couldn't help but think that she was cute, too. 

They'd gone to countless of museum and art gallery dates, for obvious reasons. They'd also spent countless of dates sketch-hunting and painting too, again for obvious reasons. "I guess you can say that we understand each other's art really well," Hyunjin told the barista. 

"Is that the only thing that was amazing about her, though? Your shared interest of art!" 

"Yah, it's way more than a shared interest of art," Hyunjin exclaimed, feeling a little offended. "And no, she's amazing in so many other ways." Like how she seemed to always be able to tell whenever he had a bad day, and knew precisely what to do to cheer him up without having to ask or be asked. And how she would crack dry jokes and remarks during a movie or drama, to which he always laughed because it always sounded funny to him. And how Kkami seemed to really like her too, and how she always made sure to have bags of treats for Kkami whenever she came to visit. "It's in the little things, really," he concluded with a smile. 

Then the realization set heavily above him: he wouldn't be able to have those little things anymore, now that they're not together anymore. Not that it hadn't hit him before, it's just – 

A box of tissue came to his view; he looked up and saw the barista pushing the box across the table to him, and suddenly realized that his eyes had indeed gone watery. "Hits different, doesn't it?" she asked in the same soft voice from before. 

Hyunjin took a sheet of tissue, muttering a thank you, and tapped the corner of his eyes before the pooling tears had the chance to roll down. "How do you know?" 

"Told you, I've helped people with heartbreaks. The key is to get them to talk about either three of those questions; how was the breakup, how are they, and how was the relationship before it ended. Chances are, they've only talked about, or focused on, one or two out of the three, and it's usually the remaining ones that'll help them get better." She offered him a small, sympathetic smile. "Is it getting better?" 

Hyunjin pondered for a moment. "It is," he finally realized. Maybe talking about his ex-girlfriend's good things did help him make a little more peace with her departure from his life. "Thank you." 

At the moment, the bell above the café's door dinged – and Hyunjin couldn't help but notice that this time it didn't give him a pang to his heart like it did before. 

"Hyunjin-ah!" 

Hyunjin turned in his seat and saw the familiar figures of Changbin and Minho approaching him. "Told you he would be here," Minho was telling Changbin. 

As they arrived at both of Hyunjin's side, Changbin put both hands on both of his shoulders and shook him. "Hyunjin-ah, as much as I'm happy to see you out of that pest-invested room of yours, you can't just leave and not tell me anything!" 

Hyunjin grimaced; he did not tell anyone where he was going. "Sorry, I'll shoot you a text next time." 

The barista watched the banter with a small smile. "I'll leave then, now that you have other people to watch over you." 

As she turned to go back to the register – which, during the entire "session" they were having, was manned by one of her colleagues – Hyunjin decided to follow his heart for the second time today. "Wait! Can I get your number?" 

It earned him a two-way surprised glare, from the her and Minho on his side. "Just in case I need some more help getting over this heartbreak," Hyunjin added hastily. 

The smile came back to her face, this time a little wider and brighter. "Alright." She took out a pen and paper from her apron's pocket, scribbled down, and handed it to Hyunjin. He took a quick glance before she left. Jinsol, her handwriting said. "Thank you, Jinsol." 

Jinsol smiled and finally walked away, back to her station behind the register. 

"What was that?" Minho asked, still wearing the same surprised look from before, only this time layered with curiosity and a bit of suspicion. 

Hyunjin shrugged. "I made a friend." 

"Good for you," Changbin said rather cheerfully. He really seemed to be happy seeing Hyunjin finally got out of his pest-invested room after nearly a week of wallowing in there. "Now let's go home, Hyunjinnie. We can grab your favorite sushi takeout on our way back." 

"A friend," Minho repeated as they walked towards the door, noticing Hyunjin turning back one last time to throw Jinsol a smile. "Alright, I'm keeping an eye on this friend, Hyunjin-ah. Just in case."

Finally, the debut fic of Hwang Hyunjin! His story took the longest for me to unravel, lots of back and forth and scraped drafts, but at long last here we are. Shoutout to @silverstarburst who noticed his absence and made the time to leave a comment, hope you enjoy this!

coming up next

Find the collage of Hyunjin & Jinsol and the rest of Stray Kids here!

[luxurystark-jackson]

marauders era characters as kpop stans

idk i randomly thought of this making it up as we go along

james:

stray kids and ateez stan (CLOSETED TWICE STAN FIGHT ME)

his favourite song is hoodie season because it’s cute and it reminds him of regulus

as a Rich Friend™️ he buys concert tickets

jeongin biased because he reminds him of regulus (me, a delusional jegulus shipper)

sirius:

full on stray kids stan

also day6 and txt

insult changbin or hyunjin in front of him and you’ll end up in the hospital wing

exists on 3racha’s soundcloud

as another Rich Friend™️ he is the number one profit source for JYPE

he puts his posters up ALL over his room and walburga absolutely despises it

he goes feral (changes into padfoot starts howling fucking nuts) if he pulls a changbin pc

remus:

ateez and txt ults but also stray kids

the marauders all stan skz let’s be real

he also listens to bts and seventeen (he’s such a simp for shua change my mind)

biases yeosang and taehyun

sirius buys him albums all the time (my dream omg) like 15 minutes after he mentions he might get an album it’s on his desk

has playlists for certain moods

fanfic reader™️ secret tumblr account for his recs and ao3 is bookmarked (we do not speak of wattpad but he has one of those too)

peter:

exo shinee and bts ults

low-key nct stan (especially nct 127) plus superm

anyone who tells you peter isn’t a 3rd gen stan is LYING

the only thing he can afford is spotify premium and he lives off of it

sirius and james try to buy him albums and he’s just like Absolutely Not i Refuse to listen to you tiny 4th gen stans

when he has some money he goes all out every single exo album he can get his hands on

he believes in growl supremacy also save me like if he could inject it into his bloodstream he would (don’t do drugs kids only bts)

he likes to dabble in producing he has a secret wip he’s been working on for like three years it’s coming out next month

regulus:

txt (certified beomgyu simp) stray kids and xdinary heroes

his favourite song is 9 and 3/4 because it’s the first txt song he listened to (plus like the magic references obviously he’s convinced txt are secretly wizards)

he buys albums obviously but he also buys those seasons greetings (as in those £70 bitches) and has a collection of them

touch his pcs and it’s St Mungo’s for you

he says stream good boy gone bad

that one time he asked lucius if he’s ever met stray kids because i.n did an impression of dobby-

lily:

twice and itzy stan. the hugest itzy stan.

ryujin/yeji bias i'd think probably both

will not shut up when itzy have a comeback

absolutely peer pressures (gently) everyone around her to listen to itzy songs

she has absolutely dragged all of the marauders to a concert with her. sirius agrees that ryujin is cool and their bonding mechanism is going to concerts together 100%

alice:

twice and bts and txt stan

huening kai biased. i feel it in my soul

she's the type to go on twitter and be the mediator in fan arguments

collects pcs and probably runs a tiktok account where she does deco for her pcs

she seems like the type to write jyp and hitman bang fanfiction but not say any part of it is satirical

pandora:

dreamcatcher and txt stan

she runs a lore account on twt/tiktok

probably has a corkboard where she notes down all the txt lore she can decipher and tries to work it out

she's also obsessed with ryujin even though she doesn't stan itzy. like. who isnt lets be real

she gets into in depth discussions with remus about the plausibility of certain theories they have about mvs

barty:

xdinary heroes day6 enhypen txt and wayv stan. dont ask

he would die for o.de he has said this many times. and sunoo probably

he would start the fanwars alice breaks up (90% of them are where he says something about hyunjin to piss off sirius completely on purpose)

anytime he sees a man with long hair he feels immense gender thoughts

absolutely the hugest thirster in the set. cannot resist a man with thick biceps at all

very obsessed with enha's vampire concept. very very obsessed with it

he would willingly learn how to do cosplays and makeup without magic so he can authentically create costumes based around idols in specific mvs

evan:

was roped into xdh by barty and skz by regulus but discovered nct on his own

he watches cringe tiktok compilations all the time

has met mark lee before. dont ask me how. he just has.

he is the most indifferent person when he gets albums but is loony when it comes to lightsticks

no1 sticker defender. probably would set up a prank of some kind where sticker just plays on repeat in potions to piss off slughorn

professional at pirating unreleased songs guy

PUKU PUKU POW POW 💥

narcissa:

closeted twice itzy and blackpink stan

she is crazy about lisa and jeongyeon

absolutely no one knows about her interest in kpop except lily

secret kpop specific twitter

participates in fanwars to put gasoline on the flames but mostly just here for the music

secretly learns choreographies and has a popular instagram account where she posts fan art (secretly)

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

hi! I'm new to the beatles lore and I've been trying to catch up on an insane level of information for weeks. it's been fun but also heartbreaking 💔💔 anyways, I wanted to ask a couple of questions if that's ok? for example, I keep seeing this narrative that john was using yoko as some sort of weapon against paul... what was john trying to achieve by that I mean where does this idea even come from? according to this, john was hurting paul on purpose while he was singing him love songs in the studio asking him to be partners again (as in songwriting creative partners) WHAT WOULD JOHN ACHIEVE DOING THAT? also it sounds very one sided like paul is the most innocent in the break up eventho he was the one who came up with a secret album and a lawsuit. I don't know what to think. before knowing them I used to think lennon was in love and on drugs so he got so annoying to the point that he broke up the band but now...

Hi there! Welcome to the fandom! don't worry about feeling overwhelmed at first there is a LOT to take in.

I want to say, I do get the feeling you are somewhat mixing things up here, though I don't particularly blame you for being confused. (if not then sorry! just want to clarify as much as I can)

Tedious as it sounds, I find keeping a timeline in my mind (ideally, accurate to the month) helpful to provide some clarity regarding the breakup era specifically, so the period of 1968-1971. John's studio taunting you're referring to would have happened between mid '68 and mid '69, but Paul worked on his solo album (what I presume you meant by "his secret album", though it wasn't all that secret – John had already released solo music of his own by that point*) in late '69 and early '70. He filed a lawsuit against the others in late '70.

*I think you're conflating the album itself with the fact that, along with the release of McCartney (said album), Paul "surprise revealed" he had quit the band to the public, which the other band members, especially John, were not impressed with.

That being said, the events of the breakup are still convoluted at best, even to "seasoned" fans, I'd say. One of my main pieces of advice I can provide as someone who's been doing this for more than 3 years is get comfortable with not knowing things and with some of the actors involved doing something fundamentally irrational sometimes. They're humans, they don't always make sense and they won't always be forthcoming about why they behaved the way they did.

Which brings me to the narratives you mention: I say this as nicely as possible, but sometimes people want to tell themselves the best story rather than the most truthful one. It's more important to some that John is taunting Paul out of some twisted form of love than why specifically.

To answer your question regarding where this particular idea comes from, I would say: Paul has indicated that he felt John replaced him with Yoko (in whatever way he meant by that – some think it's sexual, some it's about creative partnership, or simply as a best friend); John's behaviour clearly and drastically shifted for the worse in mid '68, which is around the time he got together with Yoko, left his family, and started doing heroin; footage from Get Back shows John both all over Yoko and trying to reach out to Paul periodically.

There's probably more, but I don't know if there's much point in getting into the weeds of it right now. My point is: it's not the only valid theory, IMO, and probably not the whole truth if it is true, but it's not unfounded.

I think it may be a misstep to dismiss a theory because "what would John achieve by that?" Again, people are not always acting in a way that strictly makes sense, especially not people with the issues John struggled with. Some people might say John was testing Paul, trying to make him fight for him. Some might say John had an outright sadistic streak. Others that he was too out of it to notice the pain he was inflicting on others. I think it could very easily be a mix of all three. When dealing with human emotions, I personally think it's a mistake to assume things are simple and straightforward, which is why a lot of tinhattery turns me off. It very often feels like a blanket-statement self-confirming axiom, rather than a truly thoughtful and multifaceted argument.

My most condensed version of events would be: John became incredibly difficult to work with in multiple ways (including but not limited to bringing Yoko to the studio) by mid '68; Paul, for the most part, tried to accomodate him, to diminishing returns, while having his own longterm relationship fall apart and being completely in over his head running a brandnew business; Paul deals with distress by burying himself in work, the other three do not – this leads to further conflict, along with issues over creative control; the band decide they need a new manager type to help them out with their new business and provide the guidance they haven't had since Brian died; cue John wanting Klein and only Klein and massively distrusting Paul's "nepo" choice of Eastman + apparently not trusting Paul's belief that Klein was bad news; extreme resentment over money issues which are incredibly underrated by the fandom because at their core they are boring, emotionally, ensue; John decides he's "over" the band and tells the others he's out; Paul is destroyed over this (and everything that led up to it), spends months spiraling and recording his album; wanting to get this all out of the way, Paul finally breaks down and admits he's leaving the Beatles to the world and to the band itself, even though he had asked John to stay quiet about his own quitting the band months earlier; John (understandably, IMO, though I don't blame Paul exactly – this is what I mean by not everything makes perfect sense) assumes Paul is using the band breakup for PR and gets a hell of a lot angrier than he already is about the money stuff; John undergoes primal therapy which opens up about 43273289635298 wounds; John does an interview in which he spills his guts and tears down almost everyone in his life except Yoko; meanwhile more financial issues. I cannot overstate that those matter too, tumblr is just not a place where finance peeps hang out; Paul is getting more and more fed up with all of this and he, as a last resort, files a lawsuit to no longer be legally tied to the others.

I for the most part left out George and Ringo here* and I'm writing off memory here without re-checking sources, so take what I say with a massive grain of salt. My main point is that this shit is complicated and don't let people tell you it isn't.

*I'm of the opinion that John and Paul are at the center of the breakup, but they also aren't the be-all, end-all of it. But because in the end George and Ringo fell "in line" with John and you didn't ask about them, I decided to mostly leave them out.

[writing-for-life]

Sunday Mourning—About Dream Entities and Stars

Why Head-Canons Are Wonderful, But Forcing Them On Creators Isn’t

And as always: Send me asks about everything Sandman-related!

First of all: I don’t want to take anyone’s head-canons away from them, it’s what fandom is partly built on. I support them, I love them, I have plenty of my own. The Sandman very explicitly tells us about “books never written” in Lucien/ne’s library, and we can be sure ours is in there.

But that’s not quite the same as harassing both creators and other fans in an attempt to make fanon canon, and that’s what partly sparked this post. So if a super-long meta exploration of “Sunday Mourning” (and there is a lot in this post) that also contains a bit of fandom criticism (feel free to skip that if you just want the meta) isn’t your thing—this is your warning 🤣

Also: Massive spoilers ahead…

The theory that Morpheus forever lives in Hob’s dreams (and with Hob) as a dream entity regularly makes the rounds. And it’s a nice theory, and I get why people like it. I also get that “The Wake—Sunday Mourning” is maybe ambiguous enough to consider it a possibility (which then goes into head-canon territory). All good so far.

What’s problematic is when fans begin to leverage their head-canons/theories as “true because Neil gave it a like”, and then proceed to present them as canon.

Neil likes posts, yes, but he said *several times* and *very explicitly* that’s never endorsement of anything, but rather valuing that people put thought into stuff and engage with his stories critically (and he also said that it’s sometimes just a slip of his finger, but that just as an aside, you’ll find one example here).

So if Neil liked a happily-ever-after-dream-entity post, that means he supports your head-canons as head-canons because he always does (or his finger slipped—I guess we’ll never know). Again: In a way, it’s even an integral part of The Sandman. It also means that he likes the fact you engaged deeply with the source material, in either a heartfelt or critical way.

What it *doesn’t* mean: Head-canon is the same as canon despite both being valid in their own way. He said all of this a million times in a million posts.

Let’s explore that particular theory and start with an ask:

His endorsement goes as far as acknowledging that “it’s never only a dream,” and that “dreams are where the stories are.” And we need to stop pretending it’s anything more than that, even if he likes a few posts here and there (posts that go in all different directions, btw). Neil used his own experience with grief and mirrored it 1:1 in how Hob handles Morpheus’ death in The Wake and Sunday Mourning.

Here is a quote from the Sandman Companion:

NG: […] Bette's stories have happy endings. That's because she knows where to stop. She's realized the real problem with stories—if you keep them going long enough, they always end in death.

HB: It also makes me think of Hob's dream in part 3.

NG: That was something that actually happened to me. [1]I dreamt about a friend who'd died six months earlier, woke up completely upset that she'd died, [2]and then realized I'd simply had a dream and felt enormously relieved... [3]and then I woke up all the way and remembered that she really had passed on.

[numbers and bold by me]

And then remember what happened to Hob:

1. He found out in a dream Morpheus had died and woke up upset and crying in The Wake, Chapters 1-3 (#70-72).

2. Then he had another dream that somewhat gave him closure and a sense of relief (Sunday Mourning, #73).

(Can I also just point out where Destruction’s fingers are pointing here and then contrast it with what he told Daniel in The Wake about “walking amongst the stars”, or Morpheus actually turning into a star?)

(What might the end of the story be? Who knows, but once again, have a look where Destruction’s fingers are pointing.)

3. Then he woke up all the way and felt peace (also in Sunday Mourning).

Make of that what you will, but to me, saying that scene was based on his own dream is basically Neil confirming that Morpheus has “really passed on.”

Will Hob remember Morpheus? Of course he will. That’s what humans do. Does Morpheus live a happily ever after in Hob’s dream with Hob? And would that be in character? And would he want his memories to be intact to make that happen? Would that truly be passing on?

I will explore why canonically, we don’t find much to support that notion, and why it would seem OOC. But if you believe it, it’s your personal truth. Should we call for the ending to be changed though to make our personal truth that of the author?

Life and death are our own, and it’s never just a dream

Destruction was in Hob’s dream (when Hob never really knew him), and Destruction walked away from it all. As did Morpheus. They’re both free. It was very likely (and I'm phrasing this carefully on purpose) a dream gifted by Daniel!Dream (who had a very long talk with Destruction during the Wake) to give Hob closure, and it seems straightforward enough if you read The Wake not just single-mindedly focused on one thing. Daniel!Dream is not in the original panel, but he is in the background of concept art of that panel for a movie pitch by Jill Thompson and Neil Gaiman, so we can probably assume it was always the intended subtext.

And what does Death say in Façade? Or what does Morpheus say to Orpheus, or to Delirium after he killed Orpheus? That life and death are our own.

Destruction’s life is his own.

Morpheus’ death is his own.

And Hob’s life AND death are his own.

The three of them are the literal embodiment of that sentiment:

One walked away and chose life.

One walked away and chose death.

One chooses life for as long as he sees fit and can choose death if he stops doing so.

It makes sense to put them in a panel together at the end for that very reason (and a few others of course).

That, right there, is already “more than just a dream.” It is the story, not just a metaphor. It is canon, and it is fairly explicit.

Would Morpheus ever want to be a dream entity with all his memories intact?

From this point onward, we get more into interpretation based on canonical character traits:

Morpheus living forever as a dream entity *tied to Hob’s dream* is canonically antithetical and OOC. There, I said it. He wanted to be free from the Dreaming, he even said so to Death (“But even the freedom of the Dreaming can be a cage, of a kind, my sister,” in #69).

But existing as a dream entity WITH ALL HIS MEMORIES INTACT (that alone should make people say, “He would never want this in a million years” because it’s the very source of his pain—he wanted punishment for Orpheus’ fate/death—Nuala called him out on it) would forever tie him to it. Plus, it would make him Daniel’s subject in a way. It would be, again, very OOC.

Also: Dream had very strong feelings about the dead NOT belonging into dreams/the Dreaming permanently, or the living building their lives around them. WHY would that apply to Hector, but not to Morpheus himself? Again, it makes no sense in continuity.

But Destruction was in that dream…

Destruction visited Daniel!Dream during the Wake. They talked about a lot of stuff that’s very relevant, I recommend a reread if you’re not certain (this is long enough as it is, so I’ll skip it at this point). And it makes narrative sense to anchor that in Hob’s dream for reasons already outlined (they might not make sense to Hob, but they make sense to us, the reader, if we are willing to see that “it’s more than just a dream” isn’t equal to two people riding off into the sunset together, as nice a head-canon that might be). What I *do* want to point out though is that Destructions talked about “walking amongst the stars” and again, where he points in Hob’s dream.

Someone said this somewhere else and drew parallels to Stardust: Morpheus *does* become a star (or returns to them, who knows), it’s all over The Wake. That star is in literally *every* panel with a window/sky after his barge has transformed. And what becomes of him as that—who knows, since we all know stars have some sort of sentience in Gaiman’s universe, and that “oblivion is not an option” if Death took your hand to lead you into the afterlife. Again: Head-canon territory…

Head-canons are beautiful

No one is trying to take them away from us. Let’s knock ourselves out in fanfic and fanart, it’s comforting and healing. The Sandman is a story about stories. Our stories are our own, and they are true for us, that’s the whole point. And Neil will *never* tell you your head-canon is not real, because for you, it is, and that’s all that matters. But the constant need to elevate fanon to canon really gets exhausting at times, especially if it involves pestering the creators, constantly being on their blogs/tagging them and trying to get them to confirm what we want.

And to those that insist we will undoubtedly get a happily ever after because “Hob’s dream says so”, and think the writers somehow should “read the room” and provide fan-service (side-note: What is it with this entitlement in fandom? The creator tells *their* story, not yours):

One of the main messages of the story is (already in 24/7) that stories only have a happy ending because we know when to stop, but that they ultimately *all* end in death. No matter how much people say that “the show is so much more hopeful”, that very line has already been brought into the show. They didn’t take it out. It will have weight at some point, I’ll put my money on it.

But show!Murphy isn’t comics!Murphy...

People point out that show!Morpheus is different from comics!Morpheus to justify we will get a different ending. Making Morpheus a bit softer around the edges seems, at least to me, a move to make him likeable as the protagonist, because it would be very hard to like early comics!Morpheus, to be frank. The fact that he brought Gault back from the darkness—I saw that as giving show!only fans a nicely wrapped end of the first season, because we didn’t even know if we would get a second one at that point. It also shows us that he is capable of change—a thing I am near certain he will repeatedly deny as we go on (he already did). So no, I personally don’t think it set him on a different path. There are even scenes in the show that very heavily foreshadow The Kindly Ones (the cracks in the window are overlayed onto his face in such a way that they heavily hint at the scar he is going to receive).

So yes, by all means, let’s have a bit of ambiguity in Sunday Mourning for the people who don’t like the tragic ending, but let’s also focus on more than just making everything about the ship. Their relationship is important, and even more so because it isn’t romantic—that’s why it grows and lasts (unlike Morpheus’ romantic relationships). But it’s only the tiniest fraction of what The Sandman is about.

I write fanfic. I give Morpheus happy endings, too. I get it, I want him to be happy, too. But no matter how much we write him in character, we will ultimately break character the moment we make him do things that lead to a different outcome. In canon, he is the way he is. And I am afraid to say:

I personally think he is also like that in the show, even if they softened him a bit around the edges and shoved certain messages down our throats that people who know the comics didn’t need, but newbs to the Sandman did (“I’m listening now…”)—it was a good move, and all of that made sense for show-narrative reasons. But not once did I have the feeling that he wasn't exactly the same Morpheus underneath it all, and we already had too much foreshadowing to think that we would really get a different ending.

Why chemistry isn’t confirmation of the ship

That’s another one: To turn one (!) show-writer’s comment that Morpheus’ and Hob’s chemistry was a thing, and that they allowed that type of ambiguity, into, “Their romantic relationship is canon.” These two things are not the same. And Neil said that Benton’s comment did not make Dreamling any more real/canon, but people conveniently forget that. He also didn’t deny it, he just didn’t confirm, because, again: He doesn’t confirm or deny head-canons. They’re ours. Let's please stop pestering the man to confirm our head-canons and fantasies, but that just as an aside.

It shows one thing, however:

How conditioned fandom is to make everything about romantic relationships (ideally m/m), even if they have nothing, and I say nothing, to do with the main message.

And it’s okay the wish for these relationships matters to some people, but they don’t have to matter to everyone else, to the extent that we expect the actual story to change. Why try to twist his arm into changing his own story, and the way he wanted to tell it?

So again: Head-canons are beautiful. Trying to get them confirmed by creators and foist them upon everyone else (to the extent that people get harassed) is not.

And if I'm proven wrong on this, I’ll still die happy, but I'm putting my chips down right now and say:

Morpheus will die in exactly the same way as in the comics. And if we get The Wake, we will get a scene in Sunday Mourning that can hold ambiguity for processing our grief, just like the comic can. And the shippers will say, “He’s with Hob, yay!”, and the non-shippers will say, “Nah, not what I saw.” And Neil will get a million asks and answer each single one with:

“What do *you* think?”

[midchelle]

how would you rank the different beatles couples wedding looks?

Now this looks like a job for me

9. John and Cyn (1962)

I feel a little bad ranking them this low because the four of them had about two shillings to rub together between themselves, but this was just not a great effort. John appears to be wearing A Suit. Perhaps with a tie of some sort. Paul and George's fits look kind of similar, which makes me think he got married in his Beatles suit. I guess that was an appropriate start to their marriage.

Cynthia's having a classic Cher Horowitz faux Chanel suit moment. It's not a bad look, but it's literally something you would see in Zara. There's a pneumatic drill in the background. Cyn nearly got married to George instead. What a world that would be.

8. Paul and Heather (2002)

Did you know this was one of the most expensive weddings in history? It cost 3.6 million. They rented a castle in Co. Monaghan. There were fireworks. Did you know that Heather Mills wore the most 1980s wedding dress known to man in 1989? These are the things I was forced to find out while researching this look.

I originally had this a bit higher. I didn't want to rank it low just Because Heather. But the more I look at this dress, the more I hate it. She's doing the Kate Midleton lace sleeves -- which, in fairness, was pretty forward-thinking in 2002 -- but then the lace just goes over the whole outfit, which has the effect of making everything look very same-y. Barbie in A Christmas Carol executed this idea way better.

I don't have many objections to Paul's outfit. He wore a vest. That's effort. And he matched his tie to the flowers. Like job done, basically. My only real issue here is the lack of vision. If I was Paul McCartney in 2002 and a knight of the British Empire or whatever, and I'm getting married in a castle -- I'd have a sassy little sword with me. Perhaps even just to cut the cake. Come on.

7. Paul and Linda (1969)

Don't let the cuteness of the pictures distract you from the fact that they're both dressed like they have a meeting with Harry from accounting in an hour. Paul appears to have shown the barber a picture of the guy from The Peep Show. She married him when his hair looked like that. That's love.

It's possible that Linda is wearing a non-business casual outfit under the trench. We'll never know. The problem is that these people refused to get married any time outside of the cold months. It's weird how this is the one Indian thing they all adopted.

The kid is a fun accessory. I enjoy how she and Linda appear to be matching trenches.

6. Maureen and Ringo (1965)

I enjoy how Cyn, John, and George seem to be haunting the proceedings in the second picture.

Originally, I had this lower, but you know what? I like Maureen's little Jackie O suit with the Peter Pan collar, and I love that hair accessory she has over her bun with the bow. Ringo is fine, even if he does look like he's wearing his Dad's jacket. I really don't think it's supposed to fit like that. You're Ringo Starr and this is your wedding, you couldn't get it tailored? Or just buy one that fits better?

And once again: she married him when his hair looked like that.

5. [ERROR] (1978)

I saw a lot of sources saying the first pic is George and Olivia. It is not. The man looks a bit like George, but the woman looks nothing like Olivia. The second picture, I think, is from George and Olivia's wedding, and yes, that is the best quality I could find. I think George has the same '70s open-collar suit thing as the man in the fake picture, but that's about all I can tell. Olivia could literally be wearing a rug for all I can see about her outfit. Since this is Schroedinger's Beatle wedding look -- neither good nor bad since I Literally Can't See It -- it goes right in the middle.

I can't believe they wanted to have a small personal wedding. It's like they weren't even thinking about all the Tumblrinas.

4. Paul and Nancy (2011)

Nancy Shevall's royal wedding dress ft. Paul doing a classic Paul pose.

Nancy's wearing a Stella McCartney dress -- cute -- inspired by Wallis Simpson of all people, which is kind of wild as royal wedding inspiration goes, but I like it. It's tasteful while still being unconventional.

Paul also looks great. The longer hair suits him much better. Nancy Shevall is a businesswoman, and it shows. She did not marry a man with bad hair.

3. George and Pattie (1966)

Mary Quant herself personally designed George's coat. That's how serious this is.

It's a strange occurrence because this is one of the few times that `I feel more let down by the woman than the man. Don't get me wrong, Pattie looks great. Her hair's great. Makeup: great. The tights? The coat? Fantastic. But the dress itself does look like something I wore to my friend's birthday party when I was eight. Do better.

Not featured: Paul McCartney being out of his gourd during the proceedings. Sorry, Paul. This ain't about him.

2. Ringo and Barbara (1981)

Unghhh they look so good. Sorry there's no joke.

Barbara's dress is so lovely and romantic -- I think it might be a top and a skirt, actually? Anyway, love the neckline, love the sleeves, love the bell skirt. The flowers tucked in at the waist? The lace? That's how you do lace, Heather! And Ringo. He got his hair cut by someone who actually likes him this time, and he's wearing a jacket that fits! That's how you know he was serious about it, and it shows -- forty-two years later. Very fond of the star pin on his lapel.

What really puts this look over a lot of the others is I do feel like they coordinated, her in all white and him in all black. And they one-upped both John and Paul by having not just one, but two kids. Beat that, McLennon.

John and Yoko (1969)

You might've had a cute wedding look, a great wedding look, even, but did your wedding create enduring pop-cultural tropes? Don't think so.

[master-of-47-dudes]

So I showed the early stuff off a bit a few months back, but I've finally completed the first draft of Act 1 of my Lancer adventure path, Kindness of Strangers! The deets can be found on the pilot net discord, but:

LRBT-III, otherwise known as Blanche to the locals. This sun-baked dustbowl of a planet has the high honor of being one of the few habitable terrestrial bodies that anyone has discovered in the Long Rim- and probably the only one that's actually any use to anyone. Luckily- or not so luckily, if you ask some people- it was Union that found it first. Well, about 70 years ago when they stumbled across this star system they got it in their heads that the Long Rim's days were numbered. There’s untold millions living out there scattered along the emptiest shipping lane in the known galaxy who'd need a way out once no one needed to pass them by, and by Christ the Buddha Union was gonna be there for them waiting with open arms.

All of that is background, though. You? You’re a bunch of mercenaries who got their hands on a couple of GMSes, decided to make your manna selling violence for pay. Worlds like Blanche don't take to colonies very well, so even two generations in there's still plenty of frontier out there being settled and railroad tracks being laid. The people out there struggle day by day to survive, and people like you are there to protect them from those who got sick of the hard life. Not everyone out there has the guts to stand up for the little guy- that's why you're called Lancers.

A setting and a campaign all in one, Kindness Of Strangers and its (eventual) follow-up Dancing With the Devil are a series of Wild West-themed 2-mission adventures intended to take players from 0-12 as they find themselves embroiled in the midst of a corporate conspiracy to overthrow the Union-backed government of the isolated colony of Blanche and a ploy to seize control over a nearly completed Blinkstation. All the while, a strange religious movement worshipping an eons-dead alien civilization grows ever more influential in the background...

This campaign tackles themes of colonialism, nationalism, corruption, and conflict between indigenous peoples, settlers, and immigrants, all in a world where well-meaning intentions have gone sour and the ghosts of the past have come back to haunt it. It comes with:

- A setting guide for LRBT-III and its weird-as-hell star system!

- A 0-12 campaign split up into two books, Kindness of Strangers and Dancing With the Devil, that are made up of three 2-mission adventures each. And then a final mission to tie things up.

- 4 Alt-Frames: the IPS-N Nemo, the SSC Painted Lady, the Horus Roper, and the HA Grant (still working on these)

- New Reserves! (still working on these)

- New Exotic Gear (still working on these)

- New NPCs! (still working on these)

Things to look forward to:

- Rallying a town to fight off a horde of bandits!

- An epic duel at sunset!

- Accidentally walking into a partial metavault and escaping with the only scars being mental ones!

- A weird amount of references to the works of Tennessee Williams and Arthur Miller, like a probably legally dubious amount!

- Exploding plants!

- Exploding wildlife!

- The **CHRISTHEBUDDHASAURUS**

- Helping striking miners fight off Pinkertons!

- Investigating the bombing of a water filtration plant!

- AND MORE

...so this is really my first time doing this kind of thing so I don't entirely know what all to put here BUT I've put together first drafts of both the Field Guide to LRBT and Kindness of Strangers Act 1: A Streetcar Named Desire. They're not in any state where I can charge for them- I'd call them "playtest and editing ready" rn- but I figure I can share them here so people can give notes. If people think it's cool I could possibly do a kickstarter or something to get the money needed for art and help with editing and lcps and such.

Field Guide to LRBT:

Kindness of Strangers Act 1: A Streetcar Named Desire:

[thickenmyblood]

I don't know how to thank you. This feels like the end of an era. I can't believe it's been 4yrs since you started posting hiuh and I was instantly hooked. It literally got me through the pandemic. I learned so much from the story and felt I had Neo as a therapist(the best in the world). You must be flooded with asks now but I am really curious how the story formed in your head. It's hard to believe how consistent the story is as you posted chapter by chapter. Did you outline the whole story when you started? did you stick to all the original ideas? if you changed your mind what were they? It really is a master piece - much much better than many published books I read and I hope you will publish someday, if that's what you want.

I'd also offer you my first born to have an epilogue. hopefully lamen with their child(ren) playing on the beach and Nicaise being the doting big brother. they all grew so much and deserve all the happiness. oh and Kastor and Jo and Galen for big family gathering. I'm so proud of all of them.

thank you thank you thank you for all your patience and genius and mostly, generosity.

hello!!!! i'm so happy that my story resonated with you and got you through some tough times. it did the same for me!

It's hard to believe how consistent the story is as you posted chapter by chapter.

thank you!! it will never be as good as it was in my head or as good as I know I could have made it if I had spent more time on it, but for me the most important thing is that it is completed and at least 70% of what I wanted it to be. a win is a win!!!

Did you outline the whole story when you started? did you stick to all the original ideas? if you changed your mind what were they?

i got the idea for a modern au break up fic in 2020 while I was writing and posting wtsioa. i started the story as a 20k one shot and then realized 5k into it or less that it was not going to fit into that word count. the reason was very simple: i did not want a break up fic centered around "miscommunication" in a naive, fluffy way. i did not want to write a fic where the main issue was that one loved the other too much or that they thought the other was cheating when it wasn't true, etc. i wanted to write a break up that felt honest to me, and this meant giving them both issues that felt real, that i saw in myself and in the people around me irl. which meant that it would take them both considerably more than 5k to get over them (if they ever did).

i outlined the fic very roughly. my first drafts . . . they are not it, girl. like, anyone that has read wtsioa knows that. I'm a much better editor than I am a writer, so for hiuh i outlined the main beats (nicaise calls damen after months, damen goes to therapy, nicaise is out of control and some incidents happen, laurent is dating maxime, they get back together). then, i wrote the entire thing in . . . a year? maybe less? then, i made a mistake and got cocky: i edited the first three chapters and started posting on ao3. that's why the fic took so long to post. i had to edit each chapter a lot after the first three were released.

i edited out too many things to count. things you wouldn't believe if I told you now because they make no sense when looking at the finished version. idalia was a pretty big character, and so was jokaste. in the og outline, I debated between claude/heavy drugs for nicaise. i almost named dog NIKANDROS!!!! damen actually punched aktis at the party when he talks shit about laurent . . . which led to him also punching nik. laurent slapping nicaise once. aimeric and damen baking together. then, there were things I wanted to write but couldn't because they didn't feel very real to me, despite being the best self indulgent daydream scenarios ever: damen hunting claude down (yeah, ruth wanted this to happen), dog getting sick, aimeric's EVERYTHING lol, nik and nicaise talking, etc.

thank you for sending this ask and reading the story through all the ups and downs and... lack of updates on my end!!! it has been the best experience ever, knowing that someone out there is reading and cares about what I made. thank you!!!!!!!!

[swearyshera]

So we are at the end of the road on something that has always been about the journey, not the destination.  I’ve taken my time to gather some thoughts.  This blog has meant a lot to many people, not the least of which is me.  I’ve had a hard time these last few years – I think it’s been hard times for everyone, in one way or another.  Personally, I seem to remember discovering this blog not too long before I had a breakdown and handled it very poorly, making bad decisions that cost me a lot of friends, or at least people whom I thought were my friends up until a breaking point.  (Your blog was unrelated to this).  When I came out of hospitalization I had a few things to rely upon – a video therapy group was one, certain family members and, well, as silly as it sounds, hitting up tumblr for my daily dose of Sweary She-Ra to make me laugh. And then in mid-January, 2023, one of the people who was closest to me in my entire life died suddenly of technically unknown cause but considering his health issues, probably a heart-issue. It was sudden and devastating.  We shared She-Ra and the Princesses of Power together because he was kind of curious about it and I was a nostalgia-fan of the ‘80s series.  We both became massive fans of Entrapta.  In fact, my nephew / best friend got me into the fandom in the first place because he had a silly idea for a fanfic about Entrapta wrecking havoc in the Fright Zone just post first-season and had little confidence in his fanfic writing, but decided to pass along said idea to me, an inveterate fic-writer for many fandoms.  I was put through the wringer this year – it’s the first time I’ve been in partial charge of a memorial service.  I am feeling better now than I did at the beginning of this year because I’ve found the strength to keep doing things that he and I liked to do together and time helps.  And again, in all of this, I had a silly little comic where a sparkly purple princess calls people “twattingler,” others make liberal use of the word that originally meant Fornication Under Consent of the King, one character swears all the time but apologizes for it, one character is contractually obligated to use Ned Flanders style cursing and there’s a fourth wall breaker and an incompetent boss with indecipherable accent and Marxist unicorns and all the rest.  No matter what was happening with my emotions I could just… take a little break and look at the funny fancomic.  Sweary She-Ra for me has been like a warm mug of tea on a cold day or a bowl of baked macaroni and cheese with a butter-cracker crust made out of the old 1960-70 something Betty Crocker cookbook.  It’s been Internet comfort food that has been sorely needed at times.  So thank you.  I just want to thank you for this funny little fan project.  I don’t think you have any idea how much it has meant to your audience.  @freedfromthegalactichivemind

And I don't know if the audience has any idea how much it has meant to me!

When I started this, things were pretty shit, weren't they? Here in the UK we'd just come out of the second Covid Lockdown, with the third expected to happen imminently; the weather was miserable, we'd barely seen our friends in months, the world in general just sucked. And I'd love to say that I felt a calling to break through that with some humour, but no... it was nothing like that. This is what happened...

And so it all went from there.

I almost just went for random scenes as I thought of them, rather than starting from the beginning. But I thought "Eh, fuck it, let's see how far I get", and the rest is history.

Even as the storylines got more complex (bear in mind, I started purely with the intention to do the original script with a few swear words peppered in), I always wanted to keep things upbeat. The painful moments are those 'this is the good stuff, hurt me more' moments rather than actually horrifying things - I know there's been a couple of exceptions, but in general it's held true.

But I've always been driven by one thing - the world isn't very funny right now; it's stressful, sometimes downright terrifying. And if I can alleviate that for ten, twenty seconds per day and make that tiny bit of difference to someone, then I consider that a job done. I'm not out here claiming to have the cure for depression, or some kind of plan to save the world, but I (hopefully) can make a few people smile in the midst of all the shit that's happening, even if it's just for a moment.

So much has changed in the last three years, but this blog has been such a central part of my world, it'll be weird when it's over (maybe that's why I don't want to stop there!). But if this coming Friday really is the last chapter in this part of my life, I'll still be happy that it happened. And if you've ever smiled or laughed at the blog, I'm happy that happened as well.