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mysecretlittlelibrary · 3 months

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Maybe I Just Wanna Be Yours

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Word Count: 4.6k

Warnings: oral (f receiving), handjob, sub Loki, edging & overstimulation, forced submission kinda, hair pulling, a lil choking, I hope that's everything lol

Genre: smut and I guess fluff

Summary: You make Loki realize something about himself that he was not expecting to learn.

***

You plop down on the couch with your bowl of chips, getting comfortable to watch TV.

"Are you out here by yourself?" Loki's voice surprises you. You hadn't heard him come down the hall.

"Yeah." You glance at him over your shoulder with a shrug.

"Why?" His eyes narrow.

"I'm watching TV. You are familiar with that particular activity aren't you?"

"Yes I am, but why out here alone?" Loki rolls his eyes before sticking his head into the fridge.

"I wanted to leave my room. You're welcome to join me." You shrug.

"Why would I do that?" He scoffs.

"Believe it or not, some people enjoy doing things with other people in different spaces, you awkward little hermit." You roll your eyes. You walk over to the kitchen for a drink, realizing you forgot one.

"I am not a hermit." Loki crosses his arms. You grab a soda and walk over to Loki, leaning in close enough that he leans back suspiciously.

"This is the first time you've been out your room in like a week." You tell him.

"That is not true!" He steps away from you indignantly.

"It is, and that's fine. If that's how you like to live, I'm not judging you for it. But for me anyway, a change of scenery is good for the mind." You shrug walking back over to the couch.

"That doesn't make an ounce of sense."

"To each their own." You hum.

"You are a strange woman."

"Because I'm watching TV?" You tilt your head curiously.

"You spend your time so differently from everyone else here." He says.

"Yeah believe it or not I am an individual."

"That's not what I meant."

"No?"

"I just meant that most of the tower is left unoccupied from day to day, except you, you seem to- be everywhere." He frowns.

"If you're content never leaving your room that's fine, like I said I prefer a change of scenery. Helps mark the passage of time when we're not off saving the world." You shrug.

"There is next to nothing worth doing on this miserable planet."

"You are ridiculously negative." You chuckle, pressing play on your movie of choice for tonight. Clearly, this conversation with Loki is over, you have no interest in going back and forth about his cynicism. You hear him take a sharp breath, if you had to guess it's like one of those breaths you take before speaking but he doesn't say anything and eventually you hear his shoes along the floor and you smirk as you check that he is indeed gone.

It's not necessarily that you enjoy getting under Loki's skin the way you so obviously do, but it is rather easy and no one else speaks to him, which is kind of sad. To be clear you don't pity him, in fact this back and forth he reluctantly engages in is you refusing to treat him any different than you would anyone else on the team. It just so happens that he's easy to rile up and you find it funny but really this is just you being inclusive.

"You know y/n I don't get how you do it." Tony drunkenly says. It's supposed to be game night but after an hour Tony's of course too drunk to play so now you're all just talking.

"How I do what, Stark?" You ask.

"Deal with reindeer games the way you do."

"Reindeer ga- do you mean Loki?" You blink at him. You're not even sure how the group ended up on the subject, he's not here. How long were you checked out of the conversation?

"Yes obviously." He scoffs.

"It would be obvious if you used his name. Why are we talking about him, anyway?"

"Tony decided the next topic of conversation would be the team and somehow we got to how Loki is pretty much a recluse." Natasha explains to you.

"Exceeeept he talks to you. How does that work?" Tony asks.

"I dunno man I just poke fun at him like I do the rest of you and wait til he gets red in the face." You shrug.

"You mess with him on purpose?" Thor frowns.

"No, no! Not- really? He just, okay I don't try to get under his skin exactly, it's just when he engages with me, it seems like he expects hostility. I just give him back what I get from him and I don't think he knows how to handle that. But he keeps talking to me so I guess something about it gets through to him."

"That's very weird." Tony says.

"You're really in no place to judge Tony, we all know your list of idiosyncrasies is practically never ending." You roll your eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Is idiosyncrasies too big a word for our resident mad scientist?" You ask.

"I know what the word idiotsinkities means." He scoffs.

"Right." You hum. The others burst into laughter at Tony's slurred attempt at defending himself. It seems to be enough to change the subject and the rest of the night proceeds without another weird interrogation- especially once Tony passes out.

You lean against the wall as you listen to this guy, Jack, talk. He's close enough for you to smell his cologne, mostly to be heard over the music and the crowd of partygoers. You laugh at some silly joke of his, because he's cute and you'll probably end up making out with him in a quiet corner of the tower later if he doesn't say something stupid before you make that decision. The sound of someone clearing their throat pulls your attention from your conversation. Loki is standing there with his arms crossed and faced squeezed.

"Oh? Look who's come out to play." You muse.

"Do you know this guy?" Jack frowns.

"Jack, this is Loki, he's on the team. Loki this is my new friend Jack. Don't be rude, say hello." You nod your head towards Jack. Loki narrows his eyes as if sizing Jack up.

"Hey man. Nice to meet you." Jack puts his hand out to Loki.

"I don't shake hands." Loki says.

"Right- did you need something? We were, kind of talking." Jack says.

"I don't care what you were doing." Loki rolls his eyes.

"Play nice Loki." You say, practically singing the warning.

"I'm not a dog." Loki glares at you.

"Well don't go around snarling like one." You snap.

"Is something- going on between you two?" Jack frowns.

"No." You say firmly.

"Alright well I'm going to get another drink, do you want anything?" He asks.

"Just you back here soon." You wink at him.

"I'll be as quick as I can." Jack kisses your cheek and walks off while Loki breathes incredibly noticeably agitated as he rolls his eyes ago.

"Alright Loki, what is your problem?" You scoff.

"He looks like a jungle cat."

"Really? I don't see jungle cat honestly, he kind of looks like a deer to me." You hum.

"Not in his appearance I mean the way he was closing in on you, like a lion waiting to attack a gazelle." He frowns.

"What? You don't think I can handle the big scary man Loki? Don't insult me, I've killed things that would eat him for an afternoon snack." You scoff.

"It's not that I think you can't handle him. Something about him was just- off. Didn't like his energy."

"Something was off? You didn't like his energy? Really that's what we're going with?" With a hand on his chest you press Loki against the wall.

"What else could I possibly be going with?" Loki tries to keep his voice steady, but with your hand now trailing down his abdomen you can feel muscles tensing under your touch.

"Truthfully I think somebody didn't quite enjoy seeing me pay so much attention to Jack. Don't worry Loki, he couldn't possibly replace you." You hum.

"Don't be ridiculous." He scoffs. You smirk as your hand dances lower and you watch him go stock still when your fingers trace along the waistband of his pants.

"You won't get anywhere by lying to me you know." You say. His mouth drops open slightly as you curl your fingers for your nails to gently caress his skin. "Do you want me to stop Loki?" You whisper in his ear teasingly. As if a bucket of ice water was dumped on him you watch Loki jump back out of your reach and clear his throat before walking off with a glare. You frown as you watch him go, perhaps you pushed too far this time. You think you need to apologize. You start to make your way through the crowd and somehow get caught by Jack.

"Hey, where are you off to?" He asks.

"Looking for you actually, I need a bathroom but I didn't want you to think I was leaving you hanging. If you go back to our little corner I will find you again shortly, alright?" You tap his chest and bat your eyelashes before spinning away from him to continue your task of tracking Loki down. You pop into the nearest empty room.

"Friday, where the hell did Loki go?" You ask her. The tower is huge and since you lost sight of him while talking to Jack it could take you forever to find him on your own.

"He's on the Balcony lounge at the end of the hall upstairs." Friday tells you.

"Thank you!" You tell her, heading for the stairs. Sure enough, there's Loki brooding on the balcony by himself. You slide open the door and Loki's head whips around. When his eyes settle on you, they narrow.

"I've had it with your games tonight." He says.

"No games. I actually wanted to apologize." You say.

"For what?" He regards you suspiciously.

"If I went too far just now. I'm never trying to make you uncomfortable with the teasing. If I crossed a line I want you to know I wasn't trying to and I respect your boundaries." You say gently.

"You think that made me uncomfortable?" He scoffs.

"Well you did quite literally run away."

"You do realize I'm a god, don't you?"

"So what?" You shrug.

"People worship me y/n."

"People worship me too Loki. Shall I start calling myself a goddess?" You cross your arms.

"Of course not." Loki looks at you incredulously.

"Well I'm just saying darling if you're quantifying your power here by being worshiped there are people who would tell you I am the path to heaven. Or, I suppose for you it would be Valhalla, right?" You tilt your head.

"That's rather presumptuous."

"Don't misunderstand here. I never asked them to deify me but who am I to deny those who believe I know the entrance heaven's gate?"

"And where is that?"

"Heaven's gate?" You chuckle, quirking an eyebrow up at him. "I don't think you can handle the answer to that question Loki, truthfully."

"You have no idea what I can handle." He frowns.

"I'm sure you're very capable honey but you've made it clear that you and I have... very different types." You say.

"What's that supposed to mean?" The frown deepens.

"Why did you run off? If you weren't uncomfortable, what made you run and hide?" You ask.

"How does this pertain to my question?" Loki shakes his head.

"My question is the answer to yours."

"I don't follow."

"Answer the question, and I'll offer an explanation." You say. Loki lets out a harsh breath through his nose.

"Your behavior, is disarming."

"And you don't like being disarmed?" You tilt your head.

"It's not something I'm used to."

"Right." You hum.

"So?"

"You said if I answered you'd explain the connection." Loki says.

"I like disarming people. It's something I do quite well, and often. You don't seem too fond of that. Which- obviously wouldn't work."

"It's something you do well with mortals. I'll remind you I'm a god."

"So you've said but I did it pretty well to you like five minutes ago." You shrug.

"You caught me off guard." He frowns.

"It's not like I couldn't do it again."

"That's a rather bold assumption. One that I'm inclined to disagree with." His brow furrows.

"That's cute." You chuckle.

"I'm not so easily frazzled as your pathetic midgardian males." Loki insists.

"What just happened does not support that claim, but your insistence is exactly what I'm talking about when I say you're not my type. Putting you in your place would be so much trouble." You shrug.

"Putting me in my place?! On the contrary darling I would have you begging me. You'd call me king."

"What do I care for a king when there people who call me their god?" You scoff tugging at Loki's shirt to bring his face closer to yours. "Do you get it yet Loki? You want control and I'm unwilling to give it. You think too small to ever command me."

"You don't know that." His eyes narrow.

"Your breathing stuttered when I grabbed your shirt. Plus there's not a creature in all the nine realms thinking big enough to command me darling. Don't worry it's not just you." You wink at him pulling back and turning away from him to leave.

"Your attitude is insufferable." Loki growls grabbing your wrist and pinning you against the building with a hand around your throat.

"Is it?" You smile trailing your fingers from his wrist up his arm. You watch his jaw tense as his eyes snap between your face and your hand a couple of times before his gaze settles on you. His grip on your neck tightens as your fingers reach his shoulder. There, you shoot your hand quickly into his hair, fisting a handful of it and yanking, hard. Loki's head snaps back and his knees almost buckle as a strangled moan escapes from him. Your other hand grabs his wrist attached to the hand on your neck, his grip has loosened to practically nothing from your sudden hair pull but this is about power and control and if he's determined to convince you he's got some here you're determined to ensure he knows that's not true. "Let go Loki." You say in that sultry commanding tone you usually reserve for submissives. Slowly, his fingers unfurl until they no longer hold you and you finally release his hair, only to knock his ankle in such a way that he drops to his knees. He snaps his head up towards you with a glare in his eyes but all you do is smirk at him. "Shame you're such a brat, you look so good on your knees for me." You hum tilting his chin slightly. You lean forward, close enough to feel his heavy breaths against your face. "Goodnight Loki." You whisper. You drag your finger from his chin up his cheek and then turn away, leaving him on his knees on the balcony with more questions than he can answer as you return to the party.

The loud knock on your bedroom door pulls your attention from the show you're watching. You almost don't want to get up but whoever is looking for you seems rather incesent so you roll out of bed and swing open the door to find Loki in the hall.

"Loki? What are you doing here?" You cross your arms and lean against your doorframe.

"I need to talk to you about something."

"Look whatever Tony said to upset you, you can always get him back by calling out that he's a spoiled brat with daddy issues and a lack of self control so embarrassingly pathetic it's a miracle Pepper wants to be within 10 feet of him let alone spend the rest of her life with him." You sigh.

"That was- scathing and rather immediate, do you just spend your free time thinking of nasty things to say?" Loki blinks at you.

"No but I do have an arsenal of harsh comments if ever I need to hurt someone's feelings." You shrug.

"I'll- keep that in mind but this isn't about Anthony Stark." He shakes his head.

"Well, what is it then?"

"Could I- do you mind if come in?" He asks. You poke your head into your room checking for anything you don't want him to see.

"Fine." You say after confirming your room is clean. You open the door fully and let him through the doorway. "What's this about Loki?"

"The party the other night. Do you, remember what we talked about?" Loki asks.

"Well yes but you'll need to be more specific on where this is going."

"I just, I've been thinking about it and I think you're wrong and I'd like to prove it to you."

"Oh this should be good. Wrong about what exactly? Because I think I made myself quite clear. You'll never get the control from me that you seem to think you want." You shrug.

"No that much is obvious. But you said I wasn't your type and I think that's- not true." Loki's brow furrows as he speaks.

"What a shocking turn of events." You hum.

"Do not mock me." He sighs.

"I'm not. You were so insistent you couldn't possibly fit the bill I'm surprised by the turn around."

"Believe me so am I but, I haven't been able to stop thinking about that night. Something about you forcing me to my knees I just- something happened."

"Something happened?" You quirk an eyebrow at him.

"You disarmed me again but- I liked it. I think. And I'd like to try and understand that."

"Say it Loki."

"You said your partners worship you, show me how to do the same." Loki says.

"And you're sure you want this? If you misbehave I can be very mean."

"I'm sure." He nods.

"Then we'll have to discuss some things first. I won't touch you until I've asked some questions." You shake your head.

"Ask me anything."

"How do you feel about restraints?"

"No handcuffs. Ropes are fine."

"How are you with pain?"

"I don't know my limits but I'm not- opposed." He says.

"I'm not going to paddle you or anything darling it's much too soon for any of that but we'll use a stoplight system anyway. I'll check in frequently but at any point you can say yellow if you realize you're reaching a limit or red if you need something to stop. You'll also need a safeword."

"I don't need a safewor-"

"I don't know your limits, you don't even know your limits. It's a nonnegotiable Loki, you need a safeword. Pick one." You say.

"If I must, I'll use another color. Gold."

"Gold?"

"It's easy to say, I wear it a lot, do you think it'll get confusing?"

"Nope. As long as it's something you can remember." You shrug.

"I can remember gold." He says.

"Then gold it is. And Loki?"

"Yes?"

"You must promise me you will use it if you need to." You say.

"I won't need to."

"Don't start with that nonsense." You roll your eyes. "I need to know you'll use it if it comes to that."

"Fine. If it comes to that, I'll use it." He nods.

"Good. Couple more components. Overstimulation and or edging. Where do you fall?"

"I think you underestimate my resilience." He frowns.

"These are things I ask all of my submissives Loki you are not exempt. Not everyone likes the same things. You're lucky I'm not making you fill out my entire questionaire right now. You'll have to do that later." You scoff.

"I have homework already?"

"If you want this to continue after today you will. For now, overstimulation and edging."

"That's fine with me."

"Toys?"

"Can we- hold off on those until we have a longer conversation about it?"

"Absolutely. How do you feel about names? Do you like being called mean things? Are there certain pet names you don't like?"

"When you say mean things-" Loki trails.

"Mean names like slut or whore, I might scold you for 'making a mess', or tease you for being responsive."

"If- you say something that strikes a nerve I'll say so. Otherwise proceed whatever way feels natural." He says.

"Do you have any questions?" You ask.

"No." He shakes his head.

"Well that's the end of the preliminaries."

"So we can start now?"

"You think you're ready?"

"Yes."

"Kneel."

Loki drops to his knees hesitently, looking at you with wide eyes.

"From here on you'll address me as mistress, is that understood?"

"Yes... mistress." Loki says. You can see the wheels turning in his head, trying to decide how he feels about it.

"I know I said this the other night but you really do look so perfect on your knees for me." You hum grabbing his chin. You wrap your fingers around his throat and bend over to kiss him. Loki reacts eagerly to your kiss, leaning up into you as much as you'll allow given your hand still holding his neck. When you pull away his mouth tries to follow yours but you hold him in place. Part of you just wants to look at Loki on his knees for a couple of hours, one day you'll tie him up real pretty and take pictures of him kneeling for you. "You want to learn how to worship me do you?"

"Please mistress." Loki breathes out. God that was hot. You're already thinking of ways to make him beg. You pull your shorts off and Loki's gaze falls to the apex of your thighs, still covered by your underwear, but his tongue darts out to lick his lips.

"Take my underwear off, with your teeth. Just your teeth." You tell him. Loki leans forward and latches onto a corner of your panties with his teeth. It takes him a moment to get the hang of it but you watch as Loki works them over your hips slowly. Once they're off, you thread your fingers through his hair, using the leverage to angle his gaze back up to yours. "Let's see if that silver tongue of yours is good for anything other than those silly retorts of yours hm?" You hum shoving Loki's face towards your pussy. He reacts quickly, tongue lapping at your center with fervor. You tug at his hair, arching towards his mouth, as he works you.

"That's it Loki, keep going." You moan. Loki looks up at you while he seemingly tries out a few patterns, trying to work out what you like best. You pull his hair when he does something you like, enjoying the way he groans when you do. "Wrap your lips around my clit and suck." You tell him. Loki is quick to follow your instructions and it doesn't take long for you to coat his mouth in evidence of your orgasm. You pull his head away from you, petting his head affectionately. "That was a good start. Up. Lay on the bed and take off your shirt." You instruct stepping back. Unsteadily, Loki stands up and walks over to your bed, stripping his shirt before he lays down. His body is stiff, probably since your instruction was vauge.

"Relax Loki. You look so- rigid." You chuckle sitting next to him on the bed. You allow yourself to simply admire his exposed chest, using your fingers to trace the plains and valleys of lean muscle that tense up at your touch. Eventually, you drag your hand down, dancing along the edge of his pants allowing the anticipation to build before you slip your hand beneath his jeans. Over his boxers, you stroke his dick, tracing veins and feeling it's size through his underwear.

"Uh... M-mistress?" He says breathily.

"What is it Loki?" You hum, with your free hand you work his jeans down his legs enough to see what you're doing to him. His grey boxers are already a bit darkened from pre-cum.

"If, if you keep doing that I'm- I'm afraid I'll make a mess of myself rather early." Loki frowns.

"So what?"

"W-well it's it's embarrassing mistress." He says, though little grunts interrupt his words.

"Embarrassing? So you don't want me to touch you?" You ask slowing your movements.

"N-no mistress that's not what, I do, want you to touch me. If that's what you want to do." He scrambles.

"See that's what I thought." You say speeding up again. Loki jerks against your hand low moans filling the room as you watch him react to your touch. You continue to stroke him over his boxers, watching the darkened spot of pre-cum grow ever so slightly bigger. You notice immediately when Loki's hands grip your sheets tightly. He must be getting close. It prompts you to increase your ministrations.

"M-mistress wa-wait stop I, I'm too close- I'll ruin my-" Loki doesn't finish his sentence. A shuddering moan accompanies the visual of his orgasm darkening most of the front of his boxers, wet streaks ruining much of the light grey fabric. There's something you quite enjoy about the sight even as Loki's cheeks tinge pink with shame. "I'm sorry." He mutters.

"Don't apologize. I wanted that to happen. As for the rest of your orgasms you'll have to earn them. You must ask for my permission to cum for the rest of the session. If you cum without my permission there will be consequences. Am I understood?" You grab his chin to make him look at you.

"Yes mistress." Loki says, eyes wide, searching your face, for what you're not sure.

"Good." You say pulling his dick out of his soiled boxers. You lick along the length once, reveling in the hiss Loki lets out no doubt from sensitivity. His previous orgasm makes for plenty of lubricant as you begin stroking him again, slowly. Loki's breaths come out in shudders and you lean over to place kisses and hickeys along his throat. Each bloom of red along his neck and chest pulls sweet moans from him until the sensitivity wears off. Soon, surprisingly soon, you see him grab the sheets again.

"Mistress I, I'm close-"

"So soon? Wow." You taunt.

"Can I cum mistress?"

"But before you didn't want to. Remember? You even asked me to stop." You slow down, almost stopping.

"No nonono that was- that was different I didn't mean it that way-" he seems to give up on his defense in favor of a groan at the sudden decrease in stimulation.

"Well, I was so kind in giving you the first one and you didn't even thank me. So you'll have to really convince me you want another." You shrug when his harsh breathing slows a bit you pick up the pace of your strokes again. When Loki grips the sheets you slow down again and when the tension dissipates you pick up. You do this three or four more times before Loki's moans start to transform in to pathetic sounding whines, his chest is red, his knuckles are white, and his dick is throbbing in your hand.

"Please- mistress." Loki pants.

"Please what baby boy?"

"I can't- I can't do it. I need to cum, I need to, please. Please mistress."

"You need to?"

"Please! Please mistress. Please let me cum. Oh god I need you to. Please." Loki's begging is boarderline hysteric, he's trembling and half of his words come out as moans.

"I do love to hear you beg."

"Please!" He whines out.

"Oo that was a good one. Very well, go ahead and let go for me sweetheart." You say sweetly, stroking faster to help him along. A few pumps later and he's spilling onto himself and your hand with a cry that makes your walls clench around nothing. You continue stroking him through it and even after he's coming down. You wonder if you can't pull one more from him. Loki jolts against your touch, scrambling as if to escape it but unable to go anywhere really.

"G-g-gold! Gold. I can't. Please." Loki pants out.

"Hands up." You say as you do exactly that. "Sorry Lo I- guess I got carried away. I'll get a towel for you." You get off the bed and grab a towel, wetting one side to clean him off and using the other to dry him after. You hand him an extra blanket after. "Give yourself some time to recoup okay?"

"You're cruel."

"I wasn't trying to be. You just- fell into your role so well. I told you I'm not easy. But I'll remember you're still new to this and be sure to treat you gently in the future. Mr. you underestimate my resillience."

"I can handle it."

"With time I'm sure. No rush now." You shrug.

"Wait- don't go anywhere please." Loki grabs your wrist.

"You need water honey."

"Later." Loki tugs hard enough to pull you into the bed next to him. You sigh and wrap your arms around him, playing with his hair gently. Loki will make for one interesting submissive if he decides this is something he wants long term. You'll have your work cut out for you, but maybe he's better suited for this than you think. Only time will tell I suppose.

***

#marvel #marvel fanfiction #loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki smut #loki laufeyson

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silentglassbreak · 8 months

Text

Anonymous

Noah Sebastian x OFC

I'm so sorry it took me a little longer to update. I've got a gnarly head cold, but I'm in bed, and hoping to get the next part started after this one is posted. We’re getting to the meat of the story here now folks. There’s lots of fluffy cheesy fluff in this chapter, because it’s going to get real heavy later. Remember to let me know if you want to be tagged! 🖤

Warnings: Alcohol abuse, overall abuse, mild violence (ie. bar fights), smut, swearing, and altogether just a lot of fuckery. ++ chapter warning for consensual choking***

+It goes without saying. This is a work of fiction. My words are mine. Plagiarism is a crime.

Part 7 — Concrete Jungle

The days were passing slower than molasses. I found myself working overtime nearly every day to give me something to do outside of being at home, AA, or waiting for Noah to call. Being a hermit was much easier when the only person I had to look forward to seeing was my dog.

We were so close to the end of the first leg of the tour, Noah only having two shows left before he came home for nearly three months.

I dreamt of how wonderful those three months would be. We talked about it often. He swore he was coming over the day he got home from Witchita, and we weren’t leaving my house for a solid week. As unrealistic as that was, I still looked forward to it, and scheduled vacation to have that entire week off.

I was soaking in the tub, music pumping through my earbuds when the sound of a familiar ringtone sang through my ears. I smiled and tapped my phone screen, answering the call.

“Hey babe.” I sank back down into the water, inhaling the lavender scent of the epsom salts I had added.

“Hey sweetheart, how was your day?” His voice was relaxed, calm and cool.

“Not the worst. Sam wasn’t there today, so I actually didn’t hate it.”

He chuckled. “That guy’s a real dick, huh?”

I snorted. “The worst.”

“Well, if he ever makes another pass at you, just tell him your big scary boyfriend will kick his ass.”

My eyes were closed, just relaxing at the sound of his voice. “My boyfriend?”

“Is that a problem?”

“I thought I said I didn’t want anything official?”

I could hear the smirk in his voice. “Yeah, well that was before big meathead dudes were hitting on you.”

“Mm,” I pulled my arm out of the water to readjust my towel under my head. “I’ll tell him my big scary boyfriend said so.”

“What is that noise? Are you doing dishes?”

“In the tub.”

He didn’t respond, but I heard my phone’s twinkling ringtone, indicating I was getting a FaceTime call. I snickered and ignored it.

“No way. You gotta wait to see it in person.”

I heard him groan on the other end of the line. “Not fucking fair! You’re all wet and bubbly.”

“No bubbles today.”

“So I can see through the water?!”

The jingling came again and I ignored it, laughing loudly.

“Shouldn’t you be in soundcheck?”

“That ended hours ago. I’m relaxing in my room before the show.” His voice lowered. “I’m so lonely.”

“See if Nick’s around.” I said nonchalantly.

He hissed. “Babe, I’m in a mood here, help me out.”

I giggled. “Say please.”

“You know I don’t fucking ask.” His tone was deadly now. I shivered at the sound, spreading my thighs a little.

“Fine, but no video. Last time I nearly dropped my phone in the tub.”

“Deal.”

It was silent for a beat. “You okay?” I looked over to the phone to make sure the call hadn’t disconnected.

“I’ll be better once I know you’re touching yourself.” My stomach dropped, a small moan leaving my mouth. His words were always so maddening, getting me hot so quickly.

I adjusted myself, spreading my thighs and letting my hands fall lazily over my slit, running my fingers gently over my sensitive spot.

“I am.”

“Good girl.” I pressed a little harder against my clit, rubbing slow circles around it. “Now, tell me how bad you miss my cock. How bad do you miss me, baby.”

I moaned louder now, bringing my left hand up to pinch my nipples. My undulations on my core increasing speed by the second.

“Ugh I miss you so much Noah.” I let my head fall back, eyes closed, picturing him in the tub with me.

“That’s right. You miss me touching you, baby?”

My voice was just breaths. “Yes.”

“You miss me eating that sweet pussy? Making you fucking scream?” His breaths were coming quicker now.

“Yes, Noah.” I answered louder, my hips buckling slightly at the thought.

“When I get home, you going to let me fucking destroy you, baby? Fuck you until you can’t even move?”

“Oh, fuck, yes...” I was so fucking close.

“I’m going to come just fucking thinking about it baby. Always thinking about you. That pretty, tight pussy. So fucking wet.” I could hear movement on the other end, I could tell he was as close as I was.

“Noah I need you so bad. Please come home. Please come home and fuck me. I need you so so bad.”

I heard him gasp hard on the other end. “Fuck!” His voice was sharp. He came.

I wasn’t far behind, letting out a small scream.

There was no words exchanged for at least five minutes while we both worked on getting our breathing under control.

After a moment, I heard him make a sound of disapproval. “I made a mess.”

This caused me to burst out laughing, him joining me only a second later.

“Fucking hell, Noah. I can’t wait to see you.”

He sighed heavy. “I know.” I could tell he was thinking, he only got completely silent when he was.

“Fuck it, come to Witchita! Catch a flight tomorrow and you can make the show. Then you can ride home with us.” I paused myself, now toweling off while the water drained from the tub.

“Excuse me?”

“You took the week off, right? I’ll book you a ticket right now.”

“Noah, you aren’t coming home until Thursday. I can’t leave Angel that long. And I can’t bring him on the bus.”

“Can Laura watch him for a few days?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know, Noah. I’d miss two days of group.”

He huffed, obviously defeated. “Alright. I’m sorry, it was a dumb idea.”

“No, it wasn’t. I just need more time to plan something like that.”

He had to go, ending the call quickly to shower and head back down to the venue. With a promise of calling me after, we hung up.

I called Laura that night, telling her about Noah’s promise to keep me in bed for a week.

“I’m so fucking jealous of you.” I laughed heartily.

“You’re married!”

“I know! But you’re literally dating a rockstar, Leena. I’m jealous.”

I chewed on my thumb nail.

“He called himself my boyfriend, Laura.”

“Isn’t he?”

I flopped back on my bed. “I don’t know. It feels like it.”

“Is that so bad?”

I contemplated this. “I’m scared, Laura.” My arm covered my eyes. “You know how long it’s been.”

“I know, LeeLee.” Her childhood nickname for me brought me some comfort. “But Noah isn’t him.”

“I know he isn’t.”

“So don’t hold yourself back. Have you even told Noah about him? About any of your trauma?”

“No.”

“Maybe you should.”

I could feel hot tears brewing. “I’m scared to love him, Lo.” My childhood nickname for her.

“Babes, if you’re scared to, then I think you already do.”

Well, that’s a lot to unpack.

I sniffled hard, wiping my tears. “Ugh.” I sat up. “He also asked me to fly to Kansas tomorrow. Go to the show and ride back with them on the bus.”

“That’s cute as fuck. Are you going to? You know I’ll watch Angel.” I rolled my eyes.

“I know, but that’s insane! I would have to leave in like 12 hours.”

“…and?” I didn’t respond, which told her how I felt. “Leena, you don’t do spontaneous, fun stuff anymore. Did you already tell him no?”

“Thank you for that.” I sighed. “And yeah, told him I couldn’t miss group.”

“Abel can handle group for one week.” I stayed quiet. My mind was actually considering it. “You could surprise him!”

“What?”

“Yeah! Show up without telling him, and hold up a sign that says LH hearts NS or some shit! He’s sappy, he’d love it!”

“I can’t exactly get in without him knowing. The show is sold out.”

“Can’t you call Nick or Folio?”

With that, my brain kicked into place and the plan all formed in my head.

“Laura, I’ll drop Angel off in the morning.”

She laughed. “See, you love him!”

I hung up without another word.

I dug through my contacts and found Nick’s number. The show should have ended at least an hour ago, so I guessed they were still in the green room, shaking off the energy.

“C’mon, pick up Nick, pick up.”

“Hey!” The voice was loud, a ton of background noise. “Is everything okay? Do you need to talk to Noah!”

“No!” I yelled into the phone. “No, Nick I’m fine, but I need to talk to you privately.”

Having filled Nick in on my plan, he was on board from the moment I said the word ‘surprise’. He thought it was a great idea. He told me Noah had been homesick, and he was sure me coming would perk him right up.

I booked the earliest flight to Witchita that I could, leaving at 5AM. Laura cursed at me when she opened the door to bring Angel inside at 3AM. I dropped a quick kiss on his snout and promised to text Laura the moment I landed.

I then drove to LAX, running through the terminal to my gate, barely making it on the plane in time.

My adrenaline was on high, my backpack filled to the brim with clothes, random toiletries I may need, my wallet, and my phone charger. Everything else would just have to do without.

I understood now why Noah takes a panic day before traveling, because this was anxiety-inducing to do. I hated flying, so my heart raced the entire nearly eight hours.

Once I touched down, I grabbed an Uber to the hotel, the same one I knew they stayed at. I had four hours until the doors opened. I asked Nick for a regular GA ticket, no VIP. I needed to be the first one there so I was in the very front. He needed to see me.

Checked into my room, I slipped in a quick shower to wash the flight off of me, shivering when I got out. I stared down at my bag and realized what I had forgotten.

“Oh shit!”

I picked up my phone and dialed Nick. He answered on the first ring.

“Hey, you here yet?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m in my room. Dude! I have nothing to make a sign out of!”

“Erm…what do you need?”

I ran my hands over my forehead feverishly.

“Poster board and a big sharpie?”

He was quiet for a moment. “Okay, give me 15, let me see what I can find. Text me your room number.”

He hung up and I quickly slipped my clothes on.

My phone rang, Noah’s face flashing.

“Hey you.” I even sounded suspicious, what the fuck? I’m so bad at this.

“Hey gorgeous, you alright?”

My blood ran cold. “Yeah, why?”

“Oh, just because you went to bed early last night and then said you were busy all day. I haven’t heard much from you.”

I laughed, relieved. “Oh yeah, just hung out with Laura all day. I just got home.”

“Ah, okay. I can’t talk long, I’ve got to get ready soon. But I just wanted to check in.”

“Oh, sure! I miss you.” I sat down on the bed.

“I miss you too, baby. Only a couple more days.”

I gritted my teeth. “Yup. Home stretch.”

We said our goodbyes and as I clicked ‘End’, there was a knock at the door.

Nick stood on the other side, 5-pack of poster boards and 3-pack of giant markers in his hands. He was sweating and absolutely out of breath.

“Hi…Leena…” he said in between breaths. “I ran to the corner store and got these. I hope they work.”

I took the items from him, taking note of the color of the posters.

“Neon green?” He nodded, putting his hands on his knees.

“Yeah. Trust me. He can see it way better on stage.”

I smiled brightly. “This is perfect, Nick. Thank you!”

He smiled back. “Anytime. Now look, we take a break between Death of Peace of Mind and Just Pretend where Noah talks to the crowd and gives his little monologue. It gives him time to get his voice ready for the song.”

I listened intently.

“That’s when you hold it up. He’ll have them turn on the lights so he can look at the crowd, and that’s when you hold it up.”

“But what if he sees me before then? Won’t it be obvious if I’m in the front?”

He shook his head. “Don’t let him bullshit you. When the lights are down, we can’t see shit up there.”

I was the second person in line, behind a red-headed girl who looked positively irritated. She was dressed in full Bad Omens merch, reminding me that I should have worn the shirt he gave me. Instead, I wore a black tank top, black jeans, and combat boots.

When the doors opened, I walked up to the rail in front of the stage, my sign tightly wrapped in my hands, and turned my back. I didn’t want to risk him seeing me from the back.

I pulled my phone out and shot him a quick message.

Me: Have a great show tonight, babe!

His response was quick.

Noah: Yep, last one till I’m home with you.

Noah: Call you after.

The show was so long, by the time the guys actually made it on stage, I was wiped. ERRA and Invent Animate had put on great sets, but I was here for Bad Omens.

When I heard the opening chords to Death of Peace of Mind, I felt my heart jump into my throat. I sunk low by the railing, listening to Noah’s enchanting voice sing the melody.

“You come and go in waves. Leaving me in your wake.”

I swallowed hard.

“You come and go in waves. Swallowing everything.”

The guitars and drums pounded out the last verse of the song, leaving the venue dark when the lights went out.

I began unraveling the sign, questioning my entire life. This was so corny. Is this how I really wanted to do this? Make such a strong confession to him? In a fucking sign? Like a prom-posal?!

My gut twisted. I couldn’t do this. But I had to. I came all this way. Nick nearly gave himself an asthma attack getting the supplies.

And there was my guy, sauntering around the stage, monologuing, right on schedule.

He would turn the lights up any second. It’s now or never.

I lifted the sign as high as my 5’1 frame would allow, closing my eyes to the rest of the world, internally cringing at how ridiculous this was.

“Woah, we got a sign over here!” His voice was boisterous. And he saw me, or my sign, rather, as I was hiding my face behind it.

I heard him walk toward where I stood.

“Let’s see what it says.” I peeked around the side for only a second, seeing he was bent over, squinting to read the sign.

“‘I love you Noah S’, awe, thank you, that’s so sweet.” He hadn’t walked away though. “What does that say underneath?”

He was quiet for a second. He was reading my name. ‘Leena R.’

The room fell silent, or for me it did. I heard nothing but the shuffling of the microphone being put on the stand. I lowered the sign to see what was happening just as he fixed his mic on the stage.

“Give me just a second, guys.”

The crowd screamed, and he jogged over to the area of the stage directly above where I stood. With no warning, he jumped down, causing the security guard to scramble over to him. He was unfazed, walking straight up to the railing in front of me.

His eyes were wide, a giant grin nearly breaking his cheekbones.

I was sheepishly smiling back, trying hard to maintain my composure.

“You love me?” I almost couldn’t hear him over the crowd. I just nodded wildly, moisture prickling behind my eyes.

Before anything else could happen, he reached up and hooked my neck, pulling me toward the railing and crashing his lips on mine.

All I felt was vibrations, likely from the crowd exploding. His lips tasted like mint and sweat, his gloved hand rough against the back of my neck.

When he pulled away, he pressed his forehead to mine for a second.

“I fucking love you, Leena.”

I was still shaking, my hands tucked firmly in my jean pockets while the security guard walked me to the green room as instructed by Noah.

I could hear the concert continue, only two songs left. Noah had jumped back onstage and continued as if nothing had happened, able to breeze right past it like the professional he is.

“Okay, you can wait in here. They’ll be back here once they finish up.” I smiled at the security guard and walked past him into the room.

“Hey,” I turned to look at him. “that was a ballsy move out there. Good for you.”

I blushed hard, looking anywhere but at him. “Yeah? It felt kind of insane.”

He laughed. “It was fucking psychotic.” This wasn’t helping. “But to be honest, I never see shit like that happen. It was cool as fuck.”

He left before I could say anything else.

It wasn’t long before Folio burst through the door, obviously still hyper from the performance. Jolly and Nick followed, already chatting.

“I swear to you my rig was out of tune, dude! It kept giving me sour notes during Limits, and then Dethrone was a fucking mess.” Nick’s eyes scanned the room and found me sitting on the couch, waiting patiently. “Leena!”

I jumped up. “Hey!”

“Perfect fucking execution dude! Exactly how I pictured it.”

“Yeah? How embarrassing was it? Be honest.”

Jolly laughed, pulling his long hair back into a low ponytail. “Oh, it was adorable. I loved it.”

“It was fucking cringe, dude!” Folio’s voice called from the table that had snacks on it. He looked over, open water bottle in his hand. “It was rad as fuck!”

I relaxed my shoulders.

Noah came skipping into the room after a moment, pulling the gloves off of his hands.

“Hey!” He bound up to me, his arms coming to grab me by the hips, pulling me down to another kiss.

“I thought you couldn’t make it!”

I smirked. “I changed my mind.”

“So you didn’t spend the entire day with Laura, I gather?”

I shook my head. “Nope. I spent the day traveling.”

He had disbelief on his face. “How did you pull it off?”

“Called Nick. Booked a flight. Easy stuff.”

“I risked my life for that sign, by the way!” Nick hollered from the couch.

“Is that why you ran out of the room earlier?”

Nick just nodded in response. “I came through. Pulled the wool over your eyes.”

Noah lifted his brows at me, his expression was unreadable.

“You both are insufferable, you know that?”

I had brought my things to Noah’s room, not much need for my own. My legs were feeling heavy, so the walk off the elevator and down the hallway with him was my time to find the strength. Noah was a very…active…individual, and I assumed that he was going to be looking for some time together.

When we entered the room, he walked past me, immediately pulling his shirt off and sitting in the bed. Rather than looking at me with his usual hunger, his eyes looked exhausted when they met mine.

It occurred to me, Noah had been on tour for a couple of months. He was playing shows nearly every night while traveling, sometimes without even time to sleep in a hotel room. He needed rest.

“Noah?” He only tipped his chin up in response. “I think I know what you need.”

He raised his brow, the playful expression shadowing his face. “Yeah, and what’s that?”

“A shower.” It took him a second to process, but once he did, his shoulders relaxed forward and he huffed out an amused sigh.

“Yep, you’re right about that.” He ran his hand over the back of his neck.

I stepped over to him, putting my arms around his shoulders and pulling him in close. He pressed the side of his face into my chest in a comforting gesture, wrapping his own arms around my waist.

“Then, you need some sleep. Nick said we leave at 6AM.”

I could only feel him nod. I pulled back so he could look up at me.

“Why don’t we pick up on the fun stuff when we get home? And just work on recovering for now?”

I felt his body go slack.

“Oh thank God.” I shook with laughter. “I’m so fucking tired, Leena. I didn’t want to disappoint you, though.”

“You want to know a secret?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m fucking dead, dude. I’m so tired I could fall asleep standing up.”

He laughed into my chest, caging me in just a little tighter.

“Didn’t you sleep on the plane?”

“No, I uh…I’m not a great flyer.”

“Me neither, why do you think we still take a tour bus?” His voice was muffled by my shirt and he sighed heavily.

“You, mister, go get in a hot shower. Scrub off all that sweat. I will order us some food, and get a movie on.”

He groaned approvingly. “Today is the best day ever.”

He sounded small, which tugged on my heart. “I’m glad I came.”

“Me too.”

After a solid five hours of sleep, a morning shower (that may have included some touching), and a third cup of coffee, Noah and I were standing at the hotel check-in desk turning in his room key, and my completely useless one as well. We had fallen asleep not twenty-minutes into the horror movie I had put on after devouring a pizza. We fell asleep spooning, but he eventually rolled onto his back, and I woke up half-laying on him, sweat covering both of us.

Noah was always so chipper in the mornings, which was painful for me, as I was a creature of the night. Even after all of the caffeine, I was still wearing sweatpants, one of Noah's sweatshirts, no bra, flip-flops, and my sunglasses. My hair was hanging loose over my shoulders, not brushed out after the shower. I looked absolutely dreadful.

Still, he held my hand as we walked out to the bus, and helped my backpack off of me and let me on first. The bus was about what I expected, large, loungers lining both sides, a table near a somewhat kitchenette with a refrigerator and table. In the 'hallway' area were the bunks, a bathroom that was smaller than the one on the airplane, and in the very back was a couch with two large televisions, a couple of various gaming consoles, and some cabinets that Noah showed me were filled with snacks.

I had set myself up on one of the lounge couches while the rest of the guys loaded onto the bus. I was waving to each of them lazily as they stepped on, dropping things off in their respective bunks. Folio laid on the lounger across from me, immediately letting his eyes fall closed. I felt my own lids get heavy.

"Are we ready? Ron says we aren't stopping for at least six hours." Jolly called from the front of the bus. He received several yelps of approval in the back from Noah and Nick, who were putting their things away in the back cabinets. No response from the now comatose Folio, and just a thumbs up from me.

As the bus began to move, the vibrations had me lulled, pulling me closer to falling back asleep as my eyes watched the sun slowly rising from the window. An arm reached over me, pulling a shade closed and blocking the light, which was lovely.

I heard Noah's voice above me, so I angled my head to look up. "Going to take a nap, love?" The word made me turn my lips up tiredly.

"Mm, it's not even a nap. It's just going back to bed."

He laughed, shaking his head. "You want to lay in my bunk? The pillows smell like me." He winked, making me roll my eyes playfully.

"I'm too claustrophobic for those things." I sunk down into the cushions. "Besides, I'm so comfy."

He walked to the back, returning only a moment later with a large green blanket that was plush and warm, flinging it over me.

He bent down and placed a soft kiss on my lips. "Get some sleep. I'm going to go kick the shit out of Nick at Warzone."

"Fuck you, dude! I'm going to wipe the fucking floor with you." Nick's voice carried through the bus.

Noah was only gone for a moment before my eyes slipped closed and the movement from the bus had me in a nice, deep slumber.

The drive back home was long. Longer than I had exactly anticipated. It was now about 11PM, and Noah and I were snuggled on the couch in the back, watching through The Conjuring 2, under the same blanket I had napped under earlier. I was going to sleep back here tonight, and I had this pulling feeling that Noah was too.

I was laying sideways, pressed against his side and chest as he laid flat, legs crossed and spread long on the couch. He had one arm wrapped around me, and the other folded under his head.

I wasn't so much watching the movie, having seen it many times, but I was mostly studying him. My fingers traced the tattoos on his shirtless chest, taking note of freckles that were barely visible between the lines of ink.

After a while, I glanced up at him, seeing his eyes beginning to flutter closed. I reached my face up, and pressed a kiss to his jaw, catching his attention. His arm tightened around me, and he breathed heavy.

"I'm fighting for my life to stay awake here." His voice was deep and thick, sleepy.

I smiled. "Why not go to bed, babe? This couch is a little small for two of us."

"Cause you're wide awake, and I'm not going to leave you alone."

"I'm a big girl, Noah. I can put on something to watch and lay here until I get drowsy"

He just shook his head and cleared his throat. "I'll be okay."

I shrugged and began sitting up, needing to stretch. He followed suit.

His eyes watched me as I lifted my arms over my head, my crop top pulling and exposing the underside of my breasts. I saw his tongue slide over his bottom lip.

I quirked an eyebrow. "Can I help you?"

He smirked, reaching out to press his palm into my side, making me shiver. His hands were freezing.

"Actually..." He pulled, nearly causing me to topple into his lap.

I let out a squeal, clapping a hand over my mouth. Jolly and Nick were passed out, their snores carrying through the bus. Folio was in his bunk, watching something on his tablet with headphones in. Noah had closed the door to the back of the bus when we first came back here, but I didn't want to be a nuisance, and wake everyone.

He quietly laughed, pulling my legs on either side of him, bringing my face down to his with a hand in my hair.

Our mouths connected softly, his hands coming to rest on my sides.

I pulled back slightly, my eyes glancing over at the door.

"It's locked."

I raised my brows at him, hands resting on his shoulders. "Yeah? Had ideas of how this night was going to go?"

I tried to keep my face even, but I was struggling not to crack a smile.

"I'm not as tired tonight." His voice was low, serious.

He pressed his lips to mine again, steady but not eager. We had time. We were only halfway back to LA, most everyone was asleep, and, most importantly, we were in love.

This moment together just felt different. There was a barrier that had been up, completely fallen now, leaving us bare to each other and vulnerable.

Slowly, he lifted my shirt over my head, drinking in the sight in front of him. His mouth came down on my chest, teeth leaving soft bites as he worked toward my left nipple slowly, painfully. His lips locked onto my nipple, and my head fell back. His hands pulled my hips down, only the fabrics of our sweats between us. The hard bulge ground against my core, making me moan softly.

We stayed this way for a long time, writhing together, his mouth moving from my nipples to my neck, to my mouth. I tugged on his shirt, pulling it over his head. For a second, I stood off of him, and intentionally pulled my pants down as slowly as possible, causing him to groan.

Once I had kicked them off, I reached down and grabbed onto his, only pulling them down enough to let his erection free. I then regained my spot straddling him, sliding myself over him, our mouths hot on each other. When I felt the head of his cock bump my entrance, we both froze for a second. His eyes latched onto me.

We both stared for longer than a moment, trying to decide what we do here. I wasn't on birth control. I knew I was clean. I trusted him to tell me if he wasn't. As stupid as it was, it didn't bother me. Nothing bothered me here. Nothing.

I sunk down, letting him slide into me, and I watched as his mouth fell open, eyes wide. This wasn't just us having sex on the back of a tour bus where someone could hear or see. This was more. This was something else entirely.

I felt every inch of him, all the way to the hilt, and my eyes fluttered closed, my bottom lip caught in my teeth. I was adjusting to the size, having only felt it the one time before, months ago.

"Look at me." His voice was nothing more than a breath.

I opened my eyes, staring at him, tears stinging the corners of my eyes. I couldn't say if it was from the slight pain of the penetration, or the sheer emotion I had for Noah.

His hands held me in place by my sides, keeping me from moving an inch.

"I love you, Leena."

A tear spilled down my face, and I sucked in a hard breath.

"I love you, Noah. So fucking much."

I felt his fingers release me ever so gently, and I bucked my hips, causing the most delicious friction that pulled a moan out of both of us. Again, I clapped a hand over my mouth to keep myself from giving us away, and began a slow rhythm of bouncing up and down, each thrust pushing me toward a finish line I so desperately wanted.

He leaned his head back against the cabinet, his breathing so heavy I thought his chest might burst.

"Jesus Christ, baby. Don't fucking stop." He was too loud, he would have the entire bus knowing what we were doing.

I reached my hand up to cover his mouth too, but he snatched my wrist in his hand, reaching up and grabbing the other from over my mouth. He held both wrists in one hand, and pinned them between us, not letting me free while his hips bucked, pressing him deeper and deeper each time I landed on top of him.

He leaned his head in to whisper in my ear. "Stay quiet baby, wouldn't want anyone to know."

Small squeaks escaped with nearly every thrust, my eyes beginning to roll back. I grit my teeth to keep the sound from escaping.

"That's it. Good job, baby." His eyes were half-masked when he spoke, one hand gripping my wrists in a deadly tight grasp, the other lifting my hips for leverage. "You're trying so hard to keep quiet. So good, princess."

His words were giving me a familiar tingling sensation in my belly, my climax coming closer the more he spoke.

"Look so fucking pretty when you ride my cock. Missed that tight pussy so much."

I let a small whine out and his body stilled instantly. My eyes snapped open, and he narrowed his eyes at me. The irises were black, his expression was serious.

"What did I say? You need to keep quiet."

My eyes widened, but my head nodded frantically. The lack of friction was becoming painful.

"I'm sorry."

He released my wrists, my hands falling lifelessly to my side. Both of his hands snaked up my chest, reaching my shoulders. His right hand reached up, wrapping his fingers gently around my throat and slowly adding pressure until I felt my windpipe compressing ever so slightly.

The sensation was sickeningly delicious and my legs naturally jerked in an attempt to gain sensation.

"You will do as I say, is that understood?" I nodded. He reached a hand around me and grabbed a fist full of skin from my ass, pulling me forward. His hand tightened on my throat.

"Now, ask nicely for me to fuck you."

I gasped, his hand loosening to let air through.

"Please, Noah. Please...fuck me."

His hand released my neck, coming down to grab my ass and began bucking up into me violently. I fell forward against him. His arms then wrapped around my chest as I felt the coil in my body pull tighter and tighter. I pulled back to look him in the eyes, his expression wild.

I leaned down and bit into his neck hard, causing a strangled sound to come from his throat as I felt him slow his thrusts. I used the opportunity to grind myself harder against him, the contact pushing me over the edge, my orgasm tearing out of me.

I rode down onto him hard, slowing with each thrust, until we were both panting against each other.

"Are you okay?" He breathed out after a moment, having calmed to nearly normal.

I only nodded in response.

"I've never done...that before." His voice was entirely different now, sounding nearly nervous.

"What?" I expected him to be referring to the choking. It wasn't my first time, but any other time had been pretty dissatisfying, to say the least.

"Having sex...without a condom."

I pulled back to look at him, my brows raised in disbelief.

"Really?"

He was chewing on his lip. "I trust you. I just..." He trailed off, his mind clearly racing. "I'm clean, I swear I am."

I only chuckled at this, rolling off of him and snatching my pants off of the floor. He pulled his up as well.

"I am, too. However," I slipped my shirt over my head. "I'm not on the pill, so we'll need to grab a Plan B when we get back to civilization."

His eyes widened. "I didn't even fucking think of that."

I stood up, stretching. "Luckily for you, I did."

We turned the movie off, as we had missed most of it already anyway. We sat facing each other, cross-legged on the couch, eating snacks out of our respective bags; I had Cheez-Its and he had Reese's Pieces.

"Are you from LA, originally?"

I shook my head. "No, I was born in Washington, but only lived there until I was about five. When my mom died, my Dad moved us to LA. Him and Mom lives there before I was born, and she was buried in East Los Angeles. He said it only made sense.”

"What does he do?" He popped a candy into his mouth.

"He's has a wood-working business. Builds furniture and does art pieces. He doesn't do much of the actual labor stuff anymore, at his age, but he still loves to carve. He has six stores in LA County, two in San Bernardino, and one up in Alameda."

Noah looked thoroughly impressed. "Fucking nice!"

"Yeah, he's my best friend. Best Dad ever." I smiled thinking about my Dad. I would be calling him the moment I got home to update him on my trip.

I looked up at Noah, my turn to ask questions.

"Why go to an AA group in Orange County when you live all the way in Calabasas?"

He twirled a candy in his fingers, shrugging. "Well, when I google searched AA meetings, I didn't want to risk anyone seeing me, so I didn't want to be too close by. I also didn't want to travel too far so I wouldn't have an excuse not to go. Then I narrowed it down to meeting not associated with any churches or religious groups. That's how I found yours."

"What made you decide it was time for AA?"

He was looking down into his bag, and I saw the expression on his face change. I had hit a nerve somewhere, but I wasn't sure where.

"It's like I said before, I had some downtime and figured it was time."

"I don't believe that."

His head snapped up to look at me. "What?"

"Well, maybe in general that's true, but there's usually something. One thing that leads you to AA. It's rare when you just wake up one day, realize you have a problem, and then walk into a meeting."

His eyes narrowed. "Well, that's what happened to me."

He didn't want to keep talking about this, I could tell, but something was there that he wasn't saying. I elected to let it go. I'm no longer his sponsor, maybe I'm not entitled to that information anymore.

Maybe.

#noah sebastian #noah sebastian fic #bad omens fanfiction #bad omens #fanfic

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roxie-roo · 1 year

Text

Day 5: Interviews

@majickth it's finally here! Enjoy ! <3

__________________________________________________

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

I've finally managed to sit down and interview a few of the survivors of The Watchers. It's thrilling that they want to talk to me. I'm excited to see what knowledge they'll bring to my investigation, and the insight they can provide. Hopefully, and we're crossing fingers pretty tight here, it'll bring me closer to the answers I want.

I'll update when the interviews are done!

[Transcript of James Tek interview, conducted by GRIAN ████. The following is prohibited from being viewed by the public.]

G: Can you please state your name for the records?

J: Uh,, James- James Tek. Everyone calls me Jimmy..

G: How did you first come across the Watchers?

J: Honestly, it wasn't my choice.. a friend of mine got involved with them... I was in a rough patch, mentally.. it meant a lot that a friend was reaching out, with intentions to help... He introduced me to someone, Exae,, he said they'd be able to help me. If I just gave in.

G: Gave in to what?

J: To Them...

G: The Watchers?

J: .. yeah.. We were marked. Branded... Like that mark you have on your wrist.. Except more scarred over.

G: My wha-... oh... right- uh- continue.

J: It was how we proved that we "gave in" to them. We were lead away from everyone else.. weren't allowed to talk to anyone else... It was terrifying, I was alone-... scared... People tried to contact us, friends, family, our phones were destroyed so we couldn't talk to them. My friend, though? He couldn't see it like that... he thought they were helping. He was blinded by their promises. Until- of course.. that fateful day we escaped. The sacrifice, some guy I didn't know, was murdered. In cold blood... Hah... I guess that snapped him out of it. He helped me and this other guy, Martyn, get out of there... and for our efforts, Martyn got stabbed, and... poor Taurtis got blinded. Literally..

G: -.... did you say his name was Taurtis? The friend you knew?

J: Yeah.. Why- do you know him?

G: Th the name just sounded familiar, that's all- Thank you, Jimmy, that'll be all-

[End of transcript.]

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

Holy shit... I knew Taurtis was blind, I didn't think this was what happened to him. I know he's still alive and shit, but gods....

Am I in too deep with this?

[Transcript of Martyn Littlewood interview, conducted by GRIAN ████. The following is prohibited from being viewed by the public.]

"Can you please state your name for the records?"

"Martyn Littlewood, frequent visitor of the Hollow. It's almost like having a vacation home.. if vacation homes were in creepy small towns."

"How did you first come across the Watchers?"

"Like I said, I'm not from the Hollow.. But a good friend of mine lived here, so I figured I'd come see him while I was down here. Pix ran the radio station here, Hermit's Hollow Recap.."

"The radio station that burned down?"

"An act of retaliation, I think.."

"For what?"

"Not being a good enough sacrifice. Yeesh.. that sounds harsh now that I say it, huh."

"A tad, yes... tell me more about the sacrifice thing?"

"Well- see the branding here? Yeah- his was... well- less like a branding, more like a birth mark? And- and it glowed, kinda, when he was in the circle! It was freaky as hell.. But, the Watcher Spirit- or whatever they said, I tuned them out, was taking too long to possess him? So they killed him. Right then and there. He tried to fight back, tried to tell them this wasn't fair, but they killed him.... I- I watched my friend get killed.... wow-.. that's.. that's really fucked up, isn't it.."

"Very... I'm so sorry to hear about that.."

"Eh.. But- some guy, Taurtis I think, told us to run. I mean- a lot of good running did me, I got stabbed. Annoying, right? But hey- we got out of there with our lives... even if that poor Taurtis guy got his eyes gouged out- like proper gouged, it was gross, something out of a horror movie-.... sorry, you alright there? You look a bit green 'round the gills."

"I- I'm fine.. that's.. enough questions for now.. Thank you, Martyn.."

[End of transcript.]

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

I learned something rather interesting, not just about the Watchers, but in the ways that people handle trauma and being questioned about it.

While both clearly were effected by what had happened, Jimmy was more bitter and angry, making biting comments while I asked questions. Meanwhile, Martyn was more lighthearted, and tended to use dark humor to deflect his actual feelings about the events that transpired.

In the end, these interviews at the very least gave me more information about the Watchers, and allowed me to gain a bit more insight into how they have effected people who have managed to escape. This gives me at least a little hope about possibly finding these missing people.

It also presents me with a problem. Jimmy pointed out to me that I now bare the mark of the Watcher's Vessel. I've heard about what happens to these folks and it doesn't sound like fun.

Pixl Riffs, the owner of the HHR station, was.. as Martyn had said, murdered in cold blood. But that was because he "wasn't a good sacrifice". What happens if you are a good sacrifice?

Do I even want to know?

.....

Wish me luck in trying to get this off.

... I'm gonna call Taurtis.. just to check in on him.

[End of transcript.]

#roxie's writing #hermits hollow au #sorry it took so long Magick <:[#but it's here!

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babygirlbdubs · 2 years

Text

sighs. alright. i couldn't get it out of my head so uh. here, have a continuation of this quacktho ficlet from the quarterfinals. (i didn't wanna hijack stuff's post again so new post)

***

Etho's exhausted. Normally, taking Scar down in a fight is easy. But between the mass Jellie army, and Etho's own wear from the quarterfinals... if he'd just had more time...

He lay on the ground, chest rising and falling softly-- chest rattling as he breathes through his mask. The sky above is painted in morning light, the fight having lasted all night. It's the first moment Etho's had to rest since he and Mumbo walked onto the field days ago.

"It's not fair..." he mutters to no one in particular.

"Yeah, man," comes a newly familiar voice. Quackity sighs and sits in the dust with Etho, looking over at him with a crooked smile. "That's how this shit goes. Never is fair."

Etho's brows furrow as he looks up at the duck. "You have experience with this kind of thing?" he asks with a light scoff.

"Ohhh, a bit." Quackity flops back to lay next to his ally, one arm folding back behind his head as he settles. "Hey, you think they'd let us pool our votes? Bet we'd take Scar out then."

The hermit snorts and shakes his head, looking back up at the sky. He's quiet for a few moments, the loss truly starting to settle.

"If we'd just had a break, maybe I could've--"

"Hey, hey! Don't think like that, man!" Quackity lightly punches his arm, making Etho look at him with a bit of a glare. "Dude, if fuckin' Technoblade couldn't beat him, I dunno who can." He reaches out, interlacing their fingers and giving Etho's hand a light squeeze. "You gave him the closest fight outside of Techno, and you did that after fighting against Mumbo and Joe."

For a few moments, Etho just looks at him, processing what's been said. His face relaxes a little and he nods.

"Yeah. Guess you're right."

Quackity's face brightens, the wings on either side of his head perking up. "Oh! I was cheering you on, did you see?"

Etho laughs softly, a bit of affection creeping into his gaze. "Yeah. Yeah, I saw." He looks like he has something to say, but isn't sure... he swallows and looks past Quackity as he speaks. "I'm, uh... I'm glad it was you. You're a good partner."

"Heeell yeah, I am!" The duck laughs brightly. "Don't sell yourself short, though. I'm damn glad to have had you on my side."

The pair meet eyes for a moment, sharing something between them that there are no words for.

Quackity is the one to break his gaze away, looking down at their interlocked hands. "C'mon." He sits up and tugs lightly at Etho. "Let's go get you patched up and join the others. The finals are gonna be the best fight yet, I bet."

Etho groans as he hauls himself up. "Yeah, yeah." He lets Quackity let go of his hand in favor of wrapping an arm around Etho's waist. The hermit sags against him, grateful for the support. "You healin' okay?"

"Ah, stop worryin' about me, babe, I'm fine!" He starts leading Etho off the field, one step at a time. "I've had way worse. I mean, look at this scar!" Pointing to his face with his free hand, he flashes a grin-- gold tooth glinting in the rising sun.

"Alright, alright," Etho laughs out-- cutting off to cough. "... Ow."

Quackity gives him a sympathetic look and lifts up to his toes to press a quick kiss to Etho's cheek, admiring the blush that creeps over Etho's ears from it.

It only takes a few moments before Quackity is speaking again. "Y'knooowww... You should come visit Las Nevadas sometime. I think you'd dig it!"

"Oh yeah?"

"Fuck yeah, dude!"

Etho contentedly listens as Quackity starts talking about his city. Of all the things he'd expected to happen in this tournament, this certainly wasn't one of them.

But... he's happy it did. In fact, he's already drawing up business plans for Shade-E-E's in his head.

#spooky.writing #quacktho #so um.... listen... uh....#i don't really have an excuse for this one #i just couldn't stop thinking about them? and now. erm.#have this i guess???#sighs... i don't know anymore guys #mcytblr sexymen poll #mcytblr sexyman #<- bc why the fuck not #i'm not maintagging the characters tho nuh uh #ethogirls4quackblr

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thylacinetears · 9 months

Text

@dronepikachu's GeminiTay Appreciation Week Day 2: Interactions with hermits

Buying Books and Bullying Bdubs

In which a tour of iBuy allows Gem to engage in her favourite activity - annoying Bdubs.

I basically never do these challenges but I love Gem and I figured I'd give it a try for once! No guarantees I'll do any more past this day - I prefer to take my time writing things. But who knows?

I'm also not sure if I'll post this to ao3, because that would mean everyone on tumblr would see my account and vice versa… But oh well. Hope you enjoy it!

~~~

"Alright, welcome to iBuy!" Impulse exclaimed with a smile. He opened the door and stepped aside. "After you."

"Thank you!" Gem replied. "I'm so glad you were able to give me a tour, I would be so lost in this place otherwise."

"Hey, anything for my upstairs neighbour. Now, the elevator is over here... What was it you needed again?"

"Just some enchanted books. My tools are looking a bit worse for wear with the latest additions to my base. I've been building up a bit of a chest monster, too!" she said, with a self-conscious laugh. "Please don't tell Pearl, she won't be happy."

"Wouldn't dream of it. Now, books are on floor 2, that's… already selected, so you don't need to spin the selector or press the button."

"So I just go in?"

"Yup! Except, oh, watch your head, it's only two blocks tall-"

"Oh, thanks for the warning. Yeah, that's a little too short for my antlers, they're at full growth at the moment."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't think about that when I designed it… I thought it just had to be tall enough for Doc and Mumbo! I can try to-"

"Oh, it's fine, I just have to duck a little. See? It's all good."

Gem ducked into the elevator and felt the bubble current bring her up. She held her hand above her head to stop her antlers from hitting the top, and then stepped out of the elevator. Impulse followed her a few seconds after, coming out of the elevator with a practiced jump.

"Ah, what good timing! Impulse, I think I may have broken your redstone," shouted a familiar voice from the other side of the room.

"Hey, Bdubs," replied Impulse, fondly shaking his head. "What have you done this time?"

"A 'Hello' might have been nice, Bdubs. Didn't your mom teach you good manners?" asked Gem in mock offence.

"Okay, sorry, sorry! Good afternoon Gem, good afternoon Impulse, can you please fix your shop, I've been trying to get it to work all morning."

"Alright, let me see. Be with you in a moment, Gem." Impulse walked over to observe his machine, and Gem sidled up to Bdubs.

"Hey, Bdubs. I have a question for you," she said, a cheeky smile forming on her face. She could sense an opportunity forming, and if there was one thing Gem was never going to do, it was miss out on an opportunity to annoy Bdubs.

"Sure, what is it?"

"So, when we talked about your height the other day, you mentioned that you sometimes count your shoes and hair in the equation. Is that correct?"

"Uh, yeah. Doesn't everyone? It's a perfectly normal thing to do."

His voice had taken on a slightly defensive tone, as it always did whenever the topic of his height was mentioned. The fact that she could faintly hear Impulse chuckling in the background probably didn't help things. Gem made sure to speak in her most innocent voice - no point getting him riled up before she could say her point.

"See, I had to be a bit careful when I was using the elevator before, as Impulse didn't quite make it tall enough for my antlers at full growth. So, I was wondering - if you count hair and shoes as part of height, you've gotta count my antlers, right?"

"Yeah, that makes sense, I guess." Bdubs looked at Gem suspiciously, but before he could say anything else he was interrupted by Impulse.

"I think I found your problem, Bdubs." Bdubs and Gem moved closer into the shop, and Impulse continued. "So, unlike the other shops, you don't actually put the diamonds in the same place as the items. You put the diamonds in this barrel here, and then get the books. You see?"

"Oh, right. Like that shop Doc and Ren had last season, I remember." Bdubs picked up three enchanted books, and grinned. "Thanks, Impulse. That's all I needed. What about you, Gem?"

"I'll just take some efficiency and unbreaking books," replied Gem, depositing her diamonds in the barrel. "It'll take me a while to get through those, I think."

"Take an extra one if you like, as a 'welcome to iBuy' gift. Anyway, what was all this I heard about what counts as height?" asked Impulse.

"Well, you said the elevator was tall enough for Doc and Mumbo. So, wouldn't that make me the tallest Hermit, counting my antlers? Right, Bdubs?"

"I mean - yeah, I guess it would..." Bdubs acknowledged.

"So, we might just have to crown Gem as the tallest Hermit, is what I'm hearing," said Impulse.

"Yeah, I think so," agreed Bdubs, nodding his head. "Hey, I could even try to get you an actual crown if you like, I'm sure I've got a spare one hanging around. I've got some experience in crowning people, y'know."

"Sure, I'd love that!" Gem smiled sweetly, and tried her best to hold in her laughter before delivering her final blow. "If you could reach my head."

"HEY!"

~~~

Hope you liked it! If you're wondering what I headcanon their heights as for this fic: Impulse is 5'7-8 ish Bdubs is 5'10, and almost 6 feet with shoes on and his hair spiked up (I think that the short jokes are even funnier when he's not actually that short!) Doc is 6'5 if you count goat horns, and 6'3 if you don't Mumbo is 6'5 Gem is 5'6, but her antlers make her 6'6 and technically the tallest hermit!

Also, Bdubs really has (jokingly) insisted that hair & shoes count as part of his height, I think it's somewhere in here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lj1iI7djozY

#geminitay appreciation week #geminitay #hermitcraft fanfic #bdoubleo100 #impulsesv #hermitcraft

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atmymercy · 5 months

Text

april anniversary event - my thank you message!!!

oh god. where do i even start? i'm so thankful and grateful to you all. i try and always show that to you because i want you all to know how much i do care and appreciate you. i wish i could always answer every message or reading that comes my way because i want to be a shining spot in your life and help you along the way if i can! it means so much to me whenever you guys appear and we get to connect!

i thought a fun way to say thank you this year would be to tell you the reason behind the name/url atmymercy! i'm an avid overwatch player! at least that starts off the story! lol i love the game, overwatch and it was my very first shooter game! of course, i fell in love with the character, mercy! she didn't need to aim in the game and she could go around healing people with her light beam!

lol does this sound familiar yet?

anyways! lolol i've always connected with the role of healer/helper. i'm not one for the violence or shooting (though i play a mean ana or zen too! lol) but my heart will always be called to helping and uplifting others. i don't need to be the main focus! i'm okay with being the cheerleader on the side! lol it's just who i am!

so i changed my url years ago after loving the character, mercy before i even added the tarot aspect to this blog! the only time i considered changing it is when i did add the tarot part to this blog and realized that - no, its name was already deeply situated in spirituality and self-empowerment that i always wanted to be connected with already! it was already serendipity and meant to be! lol

atmymercy can sound scary if you let it. omg! i'm at her mercy! ahhh! run for the hills! lolol but actually it's really not that mysterious. it's about surrendering and choosing mercy when your ego and mind want to fight you. why? because change is hard! so yeah, there is a bit of a trust fall when you come to me because in a way i feel like the hermit card and i'm here holding the lantern for you and it's dark. you might be a bit scared and uncertain. but i hold this lantern for us both so that even when you do feel scared or hopeless, i can help shine a bit of light and brightness into your life for a moment and hopefully show you where your path is trailing off to.

so yes, you are at my mercy but i'm also at yours because i'm determined to stand here and hold this lantern for anyone who may need a touch of my light today or any day.

i'm not going anywhere. i'm here to show you my mercy and kindness in any way i can and i hope you can shine like a star in response!

i thank you all so much! my beautiful honey lights that you are!

also for my clairaudient audience, i wanted to post the song 'God Help the Outcast' from the Hunchback of Notre Dame as my song for this year! this song has been stuck in my brain all month and i think it's there for a reason! it's a song of trust, faith and belief even when feeling lost and uncertain. it really means a lot to me and i just love singing it so hopefully you all can also connect with this song and me through it! woot!

mahsi cho! (thank you very much in my native language!)

love & light!

-tea

♡♡♡

#tea speaks

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katkat030 · 2 months

Note

YOU HAVE A FANFIC????

GIMME GIMME GIMME

(a man after midnight--)

You are in for the ramble of all rambles >:D

Okay I am smiling from ear to ear right now prepare for me to talk (type?) your ears off

it’s. yeah it's Ethubs. (ding ding! you got it *finger guns*)

I'm writing a fic based on the DBHC au (Detroit Become Hermitcraft au) story/comics by Shepscapades here on Tumblr! If you're not familiar with it, I highly recommend you check it out! I have SUCH brainrot and the storyline and art are so compelling.

Here's the masterpost if you wanna check it out once I'm done rambling!

I also want to stress this isn't my au - only the explanation and snippets of my little story is my own work. :) All credit goes to Shepscapades for all that and the brainrot

- DBHC spans Hermitcraft (seasons 8 and onwards) and the Life Series (note that all androids were absent from Third Life due to not being created yet)

- It makes use of the android mechanics from the video game Detroit Become Human <- don't worry about that part just yet though :)

- Most major post-Season 7 events seem to still be canon here, and there's a lot of other things going on in each of the androids' - and hermits' - lives (and trauma. </3. yeah. Etho and so many others are Going Through It), often as a consequence of those events.

Anyone new to the au should probably have a look at this illustrated guide post You don't have to read all of it, but I strongly suggest at least checking out the "Guide to Androids", "Deviancy" and even the "Interfacing" sections for proper context!

rambles under the cut >:) I promise I'm keeping it to a minimum. and then some snippets!!

(edit: the cut isn’t cutting, I think)

BASICALLY At some point around Season 8, Xisuma designs androids (like Mumbo, Etho, Impulse and Doc) to assign to some of the hermits (Grian, Bdubs, Pearl and Ren to name a few) for help with everything from building to terraforming. Everything goes relatively smoothly, up until... the androids begin to deviate. <- hence why I linked this post earlier!

This isn't entirely necessary for anything other than understanding the characters and the overarching narrative a bit more, but if you do want further context + cool art + a small break from my rambles, here (1), here (2) and here (3) are really good comics that sorta explain how DBHC Ethubs' relationship starts, and here (4) is the first part of Etho's first deviancy! uh. So like things happened here. Don’t worry about that being labelled first. Or it not being at all normal for an android to deviate twice. Or what situation caused it. Uh. Yeah. :’)

Otherwise you're welcome to just read on!

I'm writing an incredibly fluffy (and there's angst now too hehe) oneshot on the two of them.

They've been planting saplings for Bdubs’ Season 10 forest (Etho was originally designed to help with terraforming and that, after all) and it's late afternoon, so, Bdubs being Bdubs, he's tired.

And tired people are clingy, they let their guard down a bit, they start giving in slightly to things they don't have enough energy to fight.

Like the urge to reach out and go hey, come back, I actually want you to play with my hair, I want you to lie with me in the sunshine, I want to listen to the sound of your android heart (thirium pump) because it's a reassurance that even though my eyes are closed you're still nearby, I want you here, and I'm going to hang on to you because I don't ever want you to leave again.

I half-wrote that little summary of my fic a little while back as a proof of concept but. Yeah.

This is Bdubs talking, if it isn’t clear:

>:) Not sure if you're familiar with how Bdubs' Last Life ended, and how it could have been avoided. Or how much I'm allowed to say on what happened afterwards until we cross over into spoilers territory. But uh. Yeah. Normal and fine and not at all insane over this. <- that's a blatant lie

Don't worry though!! I said fluff for a reason; I don't think this quite crosses over into "crack treated seriously" territory (only saying that because I'm sorta working on something Ethubs-related that 100% DOES hehe) but the second half is panning out to be incredibly silly. I just think they deserve it after everything they've been through (this post makes me all levels of insane.)

Aaaaaanyway, snippets :D

Something I want to add: he isn’t entirely human. Like as much as he acts and feels and functions like one… yeah.

Tired 👏people👏give👏into👏things👏they👏don’t👏have👏the👏energy👏to👏fight

Bonus: a friend tried grabbing my phone from my hand while typing a little while ago and… this happened

OH I nearly forgot! It has a title :)

“home, home again (i like to be here when i can)”

song lyrics from Time by Pink Floyd (beware loud bells until about 40 seconds in)

I’ll publish it on ao3 under katkit03 when it’s done! May cross post it to tumblr for convenience :)

please lmk what you think, this is my first time writing a fanfic!!!

#Ha the abba reference I love that so much. It is indeed well after midnight #I'm sorry to inform you that you've fallen into the trap that is my dbhc Ethubs brainrot. you can't escape it. I can’t escape it either #I'm actually so shocked I managed to keep this under like 10k words #My writing #wip #ethubs #fanfic wip #My posts #moots #royallygray #TYSM FOR THE ASK <3 #I’m roughly 2k in - it might double in length before I’m done but I don’t see it spiralling past 1 or 2 chapters in length #Home home again

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votederpycausemufins · 1 year

Text

We're back with another chapter of Surprisingly Familiar. And I'm posting on here first rather than Ao3 bc it is not loading :')

The first two sections had a lot of backstory, so i tried to have less of that in the last section.

“Try it again. You’re making the curve too round.”

“I’m trying!” Grian huffed as he traced a small spiral in the air. “Can’t we just go back to the easier stuff?”

Grifter had called Grian over for some more magic training. Unlike before, where it had just been along the lines of using magic to do basic spells that anyone with magic could do, he was now insisting Grian work on using magic more specific to Listeners. Apparently it meant drawing the sigil of the Listeners with magic. Something that was apparently very particular.

“Sorry, but no. One of my friends has been looking into your situation. He thinks we can get you back to your time, but that there’s a bit of a time limit on that.”

“What?” Grian stopped to look over at Grifter. “Like, there’s a certain time that it can be done, or what?”

“Like, if you stay in this time too long, eventually you will never be able to get back to your time at all. I’m not going to try and go through all the ‘temporal explanations’ because I don’t really understand it all myself. But he was connected with Evo, so he knows some time stuff.”

Grian nodded a little at that. If it was another Listener who had worked with that world, then they would know about messing with time. Probably. Grifter had mentioned what it was about at one point forgetting that Grian didn’t remember that world.

“From what I can tell, the longer you’re out of your time, the more you connect with this time. Technically there’s always actually having you travel back to the past and then reconnecting, but then it becomes a lot more difficult. There’s a report of some people who had actually made a time machine that tried to just take it back an hour or so, but instead sent themselves back to before the Watchers and Listeners even existed as groups.”

“They… they did?” Grian nervously asked. If that was how bad it could go, then maybe Grifter was right to worry about taking too long.

“Yeah. They eventually got back, but dismantled the machine not long later, as they should have. Essentially, as long as the world still thinks you’re from whatever time, most methods can use you as a focus point. Because something most people don’t consider is that you can’t just travel in time. If you went back even a minute, well, the world moves along in the universe over time. Unless you can tell me the exact moment you got sent here, it would take a lot more work to figure out.”

“Well, I was asleep when it happened, so I can’t help there.” Grian replied, trying not to sound angry at Grifter, but he was frustrated at the situation.

“Exactly. So, if you want the chance to hop back in time and use magic to save Taurtis, we need to kinda rush through training.”

Grian sighed before looking back to where he was working. “Can we at least take a small break first? It’s a lot more exhausting.” Out from the ground stood two spikes of bedrock. Each one was from managing to successfully draw the sigil. While it took a lot of energy, it seemed to be from boosting Grian’s magic, his magic’s color shifting from purple to green.

“Hmm, alright fine. It won’t work well to hurt yourself.” As soon as the words were out of Grifter’s mouth, Grian flopped onto the ground to rest. He had his eyes closed, something Grifter was happy about so that his frown wouldn’t be seen.

Grifter had gone back to try and get some more help with the Grian situation, only to find that a certain someone had figured out how to get into Hermitcraft. That, along with the group of Hermits that were trying to get into this world- well, half hermits, half family, which made it even worse- certain plans needed to be sped along. Lying about Grian potentially getting stuck in this time was just one way to help move things along. Plus, Grian wasn’t actually from the past, so he couldn’t get sent back home. So it would be easy enough to claim something or other had delayed them just long enough that now the easy way was gone. It would probably be best to try and frame it as being Astrid or Flora’s doing. Sure, Grifter adored Flora, but she was getting far too close to Grian, so if he had to throw her under the bus to make sure he could finish this plan, he would.

“Hey Grifter?” Grifter looked up to where Grian was lying, glad to see his eyes still closed. “Is it okay if I hang around the castle for a bit once we’re done here?”

“Of course. It’s technically your castle as well. Any reason why?”

“Flora and Astrid are busy.” Grian lied, badly enough that Grifter could tell.

“Sure they are. What’s really going on?”

Grian hesitated before answering. He could tell the truth, at least part of it, but either way, it wasn’t great. “It’s just… uh…” He tried to wrack his brain for something to say that wasn’t exactly a lie, but wasn’t a truth either. “I saw some of Flora’s family. And their grandmother tried getting close. She… she looks a lot like what I remember from Mum, but at the same time not. And I don’t like that I can remember more of someone that isn’t Mum rather than Mum herself.”

“Ah, yeah I can see how that’s hard to deal with. So I guess they’re spending more time there?” Grifter asked, not looking further into Grian’s answer. Grian gave a small shrug, not really saying no, but also not saying yes.

“I don’t know. I guess I’ve also just been around you a lot, and then around Flora and Astrid, but I haven’t really been near the people who are going to be my husband and kids.”

Grifter couldn’t help but light up at that. Unlike Flora and Astrid, Sense and their boys knew exactly what was going on and could help steer Grian in the ‘right’ direction. “Oh well that is a very easy fix! I’m not sure about the boys, but Sense is probably just busy with redstone and needs a break.”

“So, I could spend some time with him?” Grian asked, getting a nod from Grifter before getting taken away to see the redstoner. It took a little bit of hunting before the pair finally found him working in the castle, indeed doing some redstone engineering. He didn’t notice them immediately, too entranced in his work, but eventually Grifter snuck over and grabbed Sense, making him jump at first before giving a small laugh when seeing who it was.

“To what do I owe this surprise?” Sense asked after noticing that Grifter wasn’t alone and had brought Grian along.

“Well Grian brought up the fact that you two haven’t gotten to interact much, so I figured you two need some one on one time!” Grifter explained, and Grian was surprised when Sense’s smile actually fell. For a moment, he seemed almost scared before it morphed into simply just surprise.

“I uh, I thought you two would want to interact more yourselves?” Sense offered, looking between the two avians again. “Or perhaps all three of us? Or what about the boys?”

“The boys are busy with their own things right now and if I’m not training Grian with magic, I’ve got admin duties to deal with. The regular stuff is already enough but the added bits for helping Grian have made things almost overwhelming, so the backlog piles up when I work with him.”

Grian felt a little guilty at Grifter’s explanation. It was probably that Sense was upset that all Grifter’s free time was being spent helping him and not with Sense. And now he needed to spend that time with a younger version of Grifter that didn’t know him as well. “I don’t have to if he doesn’t want-”

“Oh nonsense! Seesee will be perfectly fine, right?” Grifter asked Sense. “But if he doesn’t think so, I’m sure I can convince him.” And Grifter leaned in to whisper something into Sense’s ear. After a moment, Sense nodded and Grifter smiled. “Well that settles it! You two have fun! Bye!”

Grifter left in a blur after giving Sense a quick kiss, leaving only a feather or two behind with Grian and Sense, having them stand there awkwardly for a number of moments before either of them moved, that being the redstoner getting back to his work. At least until Grian stopped him again.

“Uh, what exactly are you working on? If you don’t mind me asking?”

“I do mind, actually.” Sense replied before pulling away to go back to work. “I’m sure Gri will be too busy to notice if you stick around or not, so you’re free to leave.”

“I’d rather stick around.” Grian spoke up, not even asking if Sense minded this time. “And Grifter mentioned you should take a break from whatever you’re doing, and you know, he’s me, and either way, I think you should too.”

There was a pause before Sense said anything more. “I’d rather not.”

“Please? Just for a little bit?” Grian pleaded, then paused before asking a question. “Do you not want to be around me because of the chance I’ll change the past?” When Sense didn’t reply, Grian continued. “Look, I’m not going to lie, I am going to try and save Taurtis no matter what, but that doesn’t mean I can’t make sure I find you too. Honestly I’d love it if we were able to boot Sam out once and for all and you could be there instead.”

“Is that so?” Sense asked, which pulled a smile from Grian.

“Oh yeah of course. I’m sure you’ve heard plenty about him from Grifter, but he was a giant asshole, still technically is for me, but hopefully I won’t have to deal with him too much longer. And I could maybe also make sure to have you around if I knew what you were doing back then.”

For a moment, Sense actually considered the possibility before remembering how it was just impossible outright. Grian wasn’t really from the past, so he couldn’t go back and change anything. But Grian wasn’t supposed to know that, so he had to play along. After thinking it over a few moments, Sense huffed and pulled himself out of his machine, wiping redstone dust onto his pants before walking towards where he had left his dress shirt and suit jacket. An action that made Grian realize the redstoner was only wearing a tank top above the waist. While he was still covered, Grian averted his eyes anyway for decency, at least until he could see Sense finish buttoning his shirt out of the corner of his eye.

After Sense pulled his jacket on, he went for his tie before realizing it had been caught by his machine at some point and had been shredded up. “Ugh, great. Do you mind if we head to our, er rather, my room so I can grab another tie?”

“Nah, it’s fine.” Grian shrugged before starting to follow behind Sense. “Sorry about that one.”

“It’s not like you could have stopped it from getting destroyed.” Sense waved Grian’s comment off. “And Grifter wouldn’t have repaired it anyway.”

“Really? Why not?”

“He’d prefer me to cycle through my whole collection. I just find it easier to stick with one and our ways of organizing them are different. The last time I went through wearing ties, I found Gri with ties strewn about the room, arguing that patterns shouldn’t be sorted with colors unless the patterns were the same color or whatever.”

“Well I’ll try not to freak out over your tie sorting.” Grian said, crossing his fingers that whatever he was about to see wouldn’t be such a visual travesty.

When the pair reached Grifter and Sense’s bedroom, Grian was reminded of when he had first woken up there. Well, other than the fact that it looked a bit more messy than it had however many days ago. He wasn’t sure if it was due to Grifter being so busy, or if this was how it normally looked and they had just made it look nicer for Grian. Honestly he could see it going either way.

Sense went over to a pair of folding doors and slid them open, revealing the mass of ties hanging inside. For the most part, they were indeed sorted by color, but Grian’s eyes immediately caught on a few ties that looked like they were out of place. As Sense thumbed through the ties in the cooler section of colors, Grian pulled out a tie covered in blue and purple patterns, though the base of the tie itself was a red color. After putting it back, he found what seemed to be an orange tie covered in multicolored flowers that also made it look out of place grouped with other normal orange ties.

As Grian continued to look over the ties, Sense finally picked out another generic looking blue tie, putting it on. As he started to try and close the closet doors again, Grian stopped him, instead pulling out a tie that was a dark green, one that reminded Grian of the magic Grifter used. “Here, why don’t you wear this one instead?”

“I’d rather not.” Sense said after looking at the cloth, pushing it back towards Grian. “I’m perfectly fine with the one I’ve got.”

“But you were just wearing blue!” Grian complained, pulling the tie Sense had on away, finding it easy since he hadn’t managed to actually tie it yet. “You’ve got so many colors here! Wear something else!”

“I prefer blue.” Sense argued, pulling a different one from that colored section. “Blacks and whites are too bland and I like a little splash of color, and Grifter isn’t a fan of me wearing purple, so we agree on blue.”

“What? What about all the other colors?” Grian asked, gesturing especially to the gradient of pinks all the way to greens and even dipping into cyans. “Even a light blue might be nice.”

“I have my reasons for not wearing those other colors as well.” Sense said, attempting to close the closet again, but being stopped by Grian forcing them to stay open, shocking Sense by the fact that it was through magic.

“Then how about you tell me and then I can choose one for you that you might like that isn’t boring.”

Sense glared Grian down before relenting and sitting on the bed. Grian smiled at the action before turning back to the closet and going through the ties. “So I assume greys fall under the same category as blacks and whites.”

“Of course.”

“Okay, What about browns? I don’t see many of those?” Grian looked back over to Sense, wanting to hear about that.

“Leather ties aren’t exactly comfortable to wear.” Sense began to answer. “And I just don’t tend to get many gifts of brown cloth ties. It’s either something colorful or greyscale to be ‘classy’.”

“Well, red ties could be classy too.” Grian lightly argued, pulling out one that matched his feathers.

“Well red is a difficulty for me.” Sense argued. “Not only am I told it clashes with my eyes, but cleaning redstone from it is a pain. Not to mention the fact that my… other self tends to use that color.”

Grian looked up. “You mean like how with Grifter and me and-” Grian hesitated, not recalling off the top of his head what Sense knew about Grifter.

“How you’re from Wels, yes.” Sense agreed. “The two of us have interacted in the past, so I prefer to make sure we don’t overlap, so I don’t wear red.”

“Well how about pink?” Grian asked. “It’s different enough from red, right?”

“A certain someone I hate very much is fond of pink and I will never get over that fact.” Sense crossed his arms. “Potentially, pink would be fine otherwise, but I would burn those things if Gri wouldn’t get upset over it.”

“Okay, good to know.” Grian quickly pushed the pinks away along with the reds. “Orange?”

“Too close to red and yellow and I don’t use either of those.”

“Oh. Wait, why not yellow?” There was silence to Grian’s question, making him look over at Sense and ask again. “Why don’t you wear yellow? It’s… not because of me, right?” Grian’s feathers ruffled, remembering the amount of times that Sam plucked his yellow feathers because he wanted them for himself, since ‘Taurtis is always wearing blue and gets some of your blue feathers, I want some yellow ones!’. The memory made Grian shudder before he remembered where he was. “If I- if Grifter gets upset-”

“He doesn’t get upset if I wear yellow.” Sense finally spoke up, though he was staring at the ground. “I will not wear yellow. I can’t. There’s-” He cut himself off as his voice caught in his throat. “I used to, but then things happened. So I don’t anymore.”

“Can I ask what happened?” Grian asked softly, pushing the ties back in place. He couldn’t help himself when he sorted a green tie out from the yellows and into the dark greens. He needed to do some sorting to help scratch that itch he felt looking at the mess. But after he put it in its new spot, Grian pulled his hands away from the gray tie and grabbed a light blue one before handing it to Sense and closing the closet.

Sense took the tie and put it on, waiting until he had tightened it around his neck to say anything more. “Well, I guess you did already ask about my past. Probably around the time you’re from, I ended up in a… situation.” Grian could tell that it was something Sense didn’t want to fully elaborate on, so he wasn’t going to pry on what the situation was exactly. “I ended up with someone who… he wasn’t quite as bad as Sam I wouldn’t think, but it was a similar problematic friendship.”

“That’s… not great. I’m guessing they’re the reason you don’t like yellow?”

“Sort of. I just… remember an argument we had where for reasons I won’t specify-” Sense immediately clarified, making Grian nod that he wouldn’t ask about those reasons. “-that the fact that I was wearing a yellow tie at the time was actually a large part of that argument. I know that sounds idiotic without the context but-”

“Me hating rabbits sounds idiotic without context. I’m sure a lot of things can sound idiotic or bad or whatever without context. But that made you swear off yellow?”

“Uh, no actually.” Sense continued. “Not entirely. I-” He paused again, a quick laugh escaping before he said more. “I’m not sure what it is, but I’ve lost a lot of the people close to me when yellow has been involved.”

That caught Grian off guard. “Wait, really? That seems weird.”

“Well, there was of course the argument I had with… my ex friend. But after him, I still wore yellow ties for a while. It’s part of why I have so many, even compared to my large amount of blues.”

Grian had to admit, there were a large amount of yellow ties when he had looked. He figured part of it was because if Sense wore mostly blue, those tended to get destroyed one way or another, so there weren’t quite as many as he would have ever owned. “But then something happened again?”

“My father liked yellow as well.” And despite the fondness in Sense’s voice, a chill ran through Grian as he immediately realized the mention of losing people and referring to his dad in the past tense meant that they were dead. “I liked the idea of matching him and I was even gifted a number of ties from him. But because of that, I couldn’t stand to see myself in that color anymore because it just made me think of him. And how I still never managed to do anything about it.”

“How did he die?” Grian asked, not expecting an answer since it seemed Sense was torn up enough talking about it vaguely. But he was surprised to actually get an answer.

“He was murdered.” Sense answered, venom in his tone from how angry he was now, any sadness completely gone. “And unlike the others, he wasn’t brought back since that would oust our new ‘admin’. Not like this wasn’t our third one anyway. And I couldn’t do anything against that hack and his stupid obsession with trying to destroy his brother’s server. Not to mention the fact that he’s apparently coming here.” And then the angry frown curled into a smile. “Well, this isn’t Helscraft anymore, Grifter’s the admin. And you’re not going to be the only hacker around this time.”

“Uh, what do you mean?” Grian asked, making Sense look up and shake his head, having gotten completely lost in his own thoughts.

“Oh, nothing. Just, apparently Gri and I’s old admin isn’t happy about us being here. To the point he’s even involved his brother and a number of wels to try and mess with us. Not to mention bringing along my other self.”

“Really? That’s not great, is it?”

Sense huffed. “Well, if Grifter can’t handle it, it won’t be, but I’m sure he’ll be able to.”

Grian patted Sense’s shoulder comfortingly before the redstoner pulled him into a hug. Grian almost pulled away, but then hugged back. Right now, it seemed like Sense needed it, and he didn’t want to take that away from him. And as they stood there, hugging one another, it hid as the light blue tie seemed to dull as a grayish purple started to coat it instead.

Everyone was just sort of standing around, not sure how to react to what they had just seen. After the jungle had faded away, half the group rushed to check on the other half. Mumbo had quickly gone to look at Grum while Phil and Techno were worried about Wilbur. Paul went to help Doc recover from the whiplash of getting his cybernetics back while also dealing with his heightened hybrid instincts, and finally Xisuma went to go to Tommy’s side.

What had thrown everyone off was Tommy flinching at Xisuma, but not from his reaction to Xisuma but rather Xisuma himself. X found himself dressed in armor that wasn’t his bee themed set, nor his regular set of green. Instead, he was dressed in a gray while standing to the side of the group was the familiar armor he normally wore, but currently being worn by Evil X.

The confusion wasn’t helped as the moment Xisuma called to his brother, they had unfrozen from whatever shock they had been in, running off across the end islands the group had found themselves on. Which left them to their present situation, at least until Phil finally pointed out that they would need to gather blocks to follow Xannes, since he was the only one of their group who could fly.

Doc was helped to sit down, not currently able to help out, but after that, everyone started to work on mining, save for Xisuma, who was staring off in the direction Evil X had gone, and Tommy, who went to Xisuma’s side. “Are… are you okay?”

“I should be asking you the same question.” Xisuma replied, not taking his eyes off the horizon. “You’re not injured from anything that was in the jungle, right?”

“Yeah. I mean, I don’t really remember much after I got separated from you guys. I think I got knocked out pretty quickly. Uh, should we assume this is him going through it now?”

Finally Xisuma looked away and down at Tommy. “I’m.. not sure. I think if it’s not, it’s something of mine that he doesn’t like.”

Tommy glanced towards where he had last seen Xannes in the distance. “Why was he wearing your armor? Mumbo said that was yours, right? Is it because you two are clones?”

Xisuma looked shocked before looking at Tommy again. “What? Clones? Who said we were clones?”

“NPG mentioned he was your clone or something. Cuz Mumbo didn’t know if you were siblings or he was a clone or what.”

“He’s my twin brother, not a clone.” Xisuma clarified. “I suppose it’s because the two of us look so much similar as opposed to…” the admin trailed off as he looked towards where Wilbur and Techno were, Tommy following his gaze and knowing what he meant. “I believe it’s probably because we have matching scars as well.”

Tommy looked back to Xisuma, realizing he couldn’t see through the visor of X’s current helmet to see the scars he knew were present underneath. It was a set of four claw marks that sliced over Xisuma’s face, going over his left eye in a way that impressed Tommy with the fact that the eye itself seemed unharmed.

“I think I remember you mentioning you got them from a dragon?” Tommy asked. Xisuma had shown off the scars to him back when he was still relatively new to Hermitcraft, trying to find ways to connect with Tommy. He had also given a summary of how he got them to Tommy, but he hadn’t really cared at the time.

“Yes, an Ender Dragon. I had managed to bring one into where our family lived and it attacked, leaving Xannes and I with our scars.”

“You think this might be about that?” Tommy asked, vaguely remembering the story a little better now that Xisuma had given the summary again. “I know you lived in the end, but the dragon’s there and now we’re there.”

“I… If it’s for me, potentially” Xisuma admitted after some hesitation. “Evil X liked to taunt me with it. There was one time where he brought in dragons to try and destroy Hermitcraft.”

Tommy shrugged. “I mean, I honestly was worried that we’d end up in a destroyed Hermitcraft at some point, either from you or me. The fact that this is just the boring ass end is pretty good in my books. And one dragon versus all of us looks pretty good in our favor!”

The wince Xisuma gave was hidden behind his helmet. While he knew Tommy was trying to help reassure him, X was also worried about Xannes being on his own and potentially ending up on the other side of whatever they might be fighting. He almost said something about it too, but then the pair of them were called over to help with bridging in Evil X’s direction to try and catch up, and to also talk about what situation they were probably in.

“So, why is he wearing your armor?” Grum asked as they were halfway across a void gap between the islands. No one was completely sure if the void was really there, but no one was fully eager to find out. “And why are you wearing that instead?”

“Well uh, that’s a really long story.” Xisuma replied, his feeble attempt to avoid the topic pretty obvious to the others.

“C’mon X, everyone’s bearing their truths to the world, it’s your turn now, innit?” Tommy asked, lightly elbowing Xisuma.

“Well, I suppose the simple answer is that armor used to… belong to him.”

“Seriously?” Mumbo asked, turning around in shock and having Paul barely grab him in time to keep him from falling off the bridge. “It was his? I can hardly believe him ever wearing anything other than red. Even with all your different armors, he’s kept the same style.”

“Since Hermitcraft, yes, but that wasn’t the case in the past.” Xisuma hesitated before saying anything more, enough that Tommy tried taking back his previous statement, saying the admin didn’t need to actually say anything. “No, you’re right. Especially because I think I know what this is all about.”

“This isn’t about when you banned him that one time, right?” Tommy asked, since he had already heard the story not too long ago. “I could just tell them if you don’t want to.”

“It’s something different.” X stepped onto the next island they reached, turning back towards the group. “As you know, Xannes and I are voidwalkers. That’s essentially the term for End based humans similar to netherborn, aetherkind, and if you want to be specific about it, terrans.”

“Which is what most of us are.” Phil said, gesturing to the group. “Not sure if he counts though.” And that time he pointed to Grumbot.

“I am Robots Georg, an outlier that should not be counted.”

“I’ll pretend I know what that means. Anyway, you were saying X?”

“Well, despite the name, voidwalkers can get what is known as void poisoning. Similar to how despite being in a dimension filled with water, you can still drown, and even netherborns can be susceptible to lava and fire in the right conditions. Some more than others, I know Tango constantly forgets his limits, not to mention-”

“We get the picture.” Techno cut Xisuma off. “Your point?”

“The last time Xannes and I were in these respective armors, there was… an incident.”

“What are you even doing with your life? The family business? You never cared about that before!”

“I care about it now, isn’t that enough? It’s not like you’re taking it up, so someone has to.”

“I’m doing something better! Something our parents can be proud of.”

“You know, you don’t get it, do you? What you do doesn’t matter to them.”

“And I’m sure you know that sooo well, huh? You’re just trying to kiss up to them by taking an interest in what our family has done for generations, huh?”

“Well I’ve been getting good at it, Starting out in the overworld is a little pain but-”

“What, can’t handle a little bit of sunlight or something? Or maybe you can’t stand wearing that suit, huh? Wish you were home where you could be out of that stuffy thing? Just lounging around in bed being a good for nothing waste of space?”

“You take that back!”

“Why should I? Isn’t that all you are?”

“I’m not! It’s not like you’ve been around, I’ve been putting plenty of work in.”

“Sure you have. So much compared to me, right? Except I’ve actually been busy. The reason I haven’t been around is because of all the work I’ve had to do. All the training I’ve had to do.”

“Stop it, you’re pushing me too close to the-”

“And once I’m done, I’ll be able to do just what you can but even better. It’ll be simple and easy. All I need to do is pop in a few commands-”

“-Look we might-”

“-pop into the End and just-”

“Xisuma!”

“Wh- You?!” Tommy looked shocked, realizing that Xisuma was being the jerk in the story, not Xannes.

“Yeah, I agree with Tommy. “ Doc spoke up. “Sure, you did a lot of pranks back in the day, especially with Biffa, but that sounded kinda cruel. You sure you’re not embellishing it to sound worse than it was?”

Xisuma winced. “No, I was an asshole back then, no way around it. I… our parents seemed to constantly put me above him to the point it got to my head. Both in the idea that I was better than him, but also that I could just keep being at the top of whatever I was doing. Around that time was when I first looked into admin classes. Suddenly there were people better than me and… well I took it the wrong way at first. I was so used to our parents putting Xannes down that… I came back to do the same.”

“Wow… yeah you were an asshole.” Tommy agreed. “How the fuck did you manage to come out of it like this?” And Tommy gestured to all of Xisuma.

“Well, for one I ended up dropping out of the class and didn’t again until after Hermitcraft had started and around the time Generik’s residency was starting to look shaky. But the main reason is what happened next.”

“Which was?”

Xisuma sighed. “The two of us both ended up falling, though Xannes managed to keep us from completely falling into the void. We were still stuck on a low outcrop from an End island with no easy way up. Not to mention our suits were damaged.”

“Xannes! Your suit!”

“Huh? Oh, it’s just a tear in the back, no big.”

“The fabric’s almost completely gone! How the hell did you manage that?! Do you have any idea how hard stuff like that is to repair?!”

“Oh, that’s what you’re concerned about… Thanks. Good to know the fabric is so much more important than my well being.”

“Well you’re the one who got us stuck in this mess.”

“Me? You’re the one who pushed us in here. I’ve been living here and could have been just fine with a respawn, but you’ve been away at your fancy school, so it wouldn’t have been as nice for you.”

“Then why not let me fall?”

“I could have. If you want I could still push you in!”

“Then do it!”

“...No. I’m not the only one who had their suit damaged.”

“What are you- my helmet!”

“See, at least I can stitch back together my suit.”

“You mean make Mom do it for you.”

“No I don't. I know how to sew. I learned even without Mother’s help.”

“Calling her that won’t make her dote on you.”

“I know that! Look, can you shut up for just… five minutes. Unless you want the void seeping in faster.”

“We did actually stay there quietly for a while, and at one point they even pulled their suit off to start fixing it. They didn’t exactly have the necessary tools on hand, but that actually made it a little more impressive. I had been worried about them not wearing it though, since there’s a reason we wore them even in the End.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re coughing too much. Take your helmet off so I can see.”

“I said I’m *cough* fine! Don’t touch me! *cough*”

“‘Suma, c’mon, let me look!”

“Fine! Whatev- *cough* -ever.”

“Shit, this is bad.”

“What *cough* do you mean?”

“It’s already black. We still don’t know if anyone’s coming, and if they are, how long it’ll take. If they knew you were back then maybe-”

“So? *cough* They’ll notice you’re gone and *cough cough* come looking. How *cough* long are you usually out?”

“... Take my helmet.”

“What?”

“Put it on you derp! You need it more right now. Unless you want to die.”

“What about *cough* you?”

“I’ll just wear yours to make it take longer. They’ll show up soon enough, so it should last me until then.”

“No one showed up for hours. I’m not sure how long it even took because the two of us passed out before then.” Xisuma finished in a somber tone. “Turns out a near death experience really shakes up how you see things. And apparently my own armor was more damaged than I thought, because at some point Xannes switched ours up to make sure it would stave off the void poisoning for me. And he was right, I recovered fairly quickly, but he didn’t.”

“But I mean, he’s alright now, right?”

“I guess.” Xisuma answered, though he didn’t sound sure. “It was after that that they started being a bit more angry and violent towards me.”

“And a side effect of void poisoning is a sort of… unpredictable blind rage, right?” Paul asked. “The void causes a weird decay in the mind, similar to what zombifies creatures, but practically irreversible.”

“Right. And so I just wonder if maybe his current situation is my fault. If I hadn’t started that argument-”

“Well it sounds like your parents were jerks too!” Tommy said, cutting Xisuma off and making Phil wince. “If they hadn’t treated you like a perfect golden child and him as a scum of the… End, black sheep, then it wouldn’t have happened, right?”

“Well, yes, but-”

“Tommy’s right.” Techno spoke up this time. “And look, I’m not trying to use it as an excuse for any of us, but sometimes the actions we take are influenced by others in a way that the blame can be placed on them. It depends on the actions themselves, but in this case it doesn't seem like your fault.”

“The Wither were totally yours though.”

“And I said I’m not using it as an excuse.”

“How about we stop talking and just find Evil X!” Grumbot practically shouted, pointing off into the distance. “There’s lots of lightning that way! So they must be there! Let’s go!”

“So, that was your dad, huh?” Jrum spoke up as the block he was trying to lift with magic fell back down the pixel or so he had managed.

“Yep! That’s Papa! He’s really really really nice and I love him lots and lots!” Vee replied with the biggest smile on her face. “He adopted me, and then my sister, and so now the three of us are a big happy family! Well, maybe not big, but definitely happy!”

Jrum couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Vee at the very least seemed innocent enough, or maybe the better word was oblivious. Her dad had been working with Grifter and somehow hadn’t realized that something was wrong with Grian. Or, well, it sounded like he did know, but completely trusted Grifter with any lies he told. But that was what Vee was saying, and she had also fallen for Grifter’s lies, so who knew, maybe her dad wasn’t lied to, but both he and Grifter were lying to her.

And then there was her sister, which made Jrum more sure that they were all just lying to Vee. He remembered that comm call. He knew the voice on the other end. It sounded like his dad, but simultaneously not. It had to be Grifter then, right? Vee had even said it was Grifter. And he was there through Vee’s sister’s comm. The same sister that was apparently dating Grifter’s niece. They all had a connection to Grifter, so there was no way none of them knew what was going on.

“Ooo! Lookit! You’re doing it really well!” Vee exclaimed, making Jrum realize he had moved the block up a full meter this time. He was a little surprised by that, since he hadn’t even been paying attention to what he was doing, and now that he was focusing on the block, it fell once more. “Aww, don’t worry! You’re doing really really well!”

“Whatever.” Jrum huffed. “You know, you keep bringing up that your dad adopted you and your sister, right? And in that one meeting you mentioned that she had a brother that sucked?”

Vee’s smile disappeared. “Yeah… he was really really bad.”

“Mind telling me?” Jrum asked. They had figured out who Flora or Fleur was supposed to be, but Astrid was still a little up in the air, and since she was around Grifter and maybe also around Grian, it was important to know about her too.

“Um, well…” Vee hesitated, kicking at the ground. “Nightmare was-”

Vee didn’t get a chance to continue, Jrum immediately recognizing the name. “Nightmare?! Her brother is him?!”

“Y-You know him?”

“Know him?! It’s because of him that my brother got kidnapped by Tommy’s stupid hels! And then it turned into a whole mess with Grifter getting involved and hurting my family! And then Grifter came back and made everything worse!”

“Eep!” Vee yelped, and Jrum looked over to her and the spike of bedrock that had appeared from the ground, pointing at her face. Jrum was shocked to see it, looking himself over before looking back up to essentially growl at the spike. Surprisingly, it seemed to react to his growl and disappeared into the ground a moment later. “You g-gotta be careful with that.”

“Yeah… sorry…” Jrum responded, though distracted. Things kept happening when he was angry, so maybe- “How much do emotions affect magic?”

“Uh, a lot?” Vee answered, though she didn’t seem confident with her answer. “Uh, they can help with focusing it. Papa helped me train with music and he said it was because uh… the emotions of the sounds help with how you feel, ‘n then it works as a guide for what you want the magic to do!” That time she started unsure, but slowly got more confident as she spoke, which helped reassure Jrum. Especially when she followed it up with a little magic demonstration of her own.

“So because I keep feeling angry and frustrated, stuff keeps happening for me? Do I just need to be constantly angry?”

“Oh no no no.” Vee quickly waved her hands to stop Jrum. “It’s just stronger stuff makes it react more when you’re new to it! Even sometimes when you’re not new to it cuz Papa has had it happen too. Uh, it’s kinda like when I got scared and then made those boxes.”

Jrum remembered the bedrock that trapped Ren. And then he thought more to his own dad, and the times his magic had acted up when it seemed he was feeling some sort of intense emotion like anger or fear. He could even remember one time when Grian was really happy and that had caused some sudden magic. Jrum almost made a comment about it, but then paused. When he had been trying to eavesdrop on the conversation Phil and Paul had had, way back when the latter had first arrived. He had made a comment about knowing Jrum was listening in to their conversation. He hadn’t known how the man recognised Jrum had hacked his way in, but Paul seemed to know enough magic that if Jrum was using magic instead…

Jrum focused once more on the block in front of him, reaching out and managing to lift it once again. This time he was actually controlling it when it got a block higher, and still when he pushed it left and right before it finally fell on its own, Jrum finding himself a little tired.

“You did it!” Vee exclaimed, jumping up and down before tackling Jrum with a hug. “We should show Papa! Oh wait, he’s busy. I could message Astrid! But she might be busy too. Grifter is-! Grifter is bad, we said that. Uhh… Well I think we should tell someone!”

“Yeah whatever, let me see who’s available.” Jrum rolled his eyes, trying not to smile with how infectious Vee’s joy was. He was easily able to send a message to the world chat, getting an answer not too long later from Joe, who was apparently happy to be available. Jrum thought he would be more involved in whatever important stuff the Hermits were up to, but Jrum also supposed that Vee was already pretty comfortable with him. “Joe says we can meet up with him. Let’s go.”

Vee was bouncing again as they left to meet with the Hermit, finding him a small distance away from the meeting room at what seemed to be a newly set up table and chairs for the three of them to hang out at. “Howdy there you two. I heard you had somethin’ to share?”

Jrum couldn’t get a word out before Vee answered for him. “Jrum’s doing Watcher Magic! Like he could do a little before, but he’s doing a lot better now! He did block moving! C’mon, do it again!” Jrum sighed before moving a new block a bit, though not nearly as much since he was still tired from before, and running over there hadn’t helped him regain any energy.

“I need some redstone.” Jrum panted, surprised when Joe handed some over. “Why do you have-?”

“Well someone pointed out that you might need some since you were doing a lot of work. Well, technically multiple someones, as it was recommended you get somethin’ to eat followed by gettin’ pointed out you tend to eat minerals like redstone, especially since that helps with chargin’ you up.”

“Uh, thanks then.” Jrum ate the redstone before getting some more from Joe, which he put in his inventory to save for later and make sure he didn’t use it all up in one sitting.

“No problem at all.” Then Joe looked towards Vee. “Yes?”

Jrum looked over to Vee as well, finding her fidgeting where she stood. “Um, are you still mad at me?”

“Mad at you? Now what gave you that impression?”

“Well, when you visited me when I was at Stress’ place, you got really upset.”

Jrum saw as it took a moment for Joe to remember what she meant. “Ah, that. Well I’m sorry for makin’ you think I was mad at you. You had just caught me off guard with what you were talkin’ about, and I suppose that surprise came off as anger which you thought was directed at you.”

Jrum was a little taken aback. Joe caught off guard? That never happened. Or well, it could definitely happen, but he had the uncanny ability to always seem to know what was going on when things were serious, like with the current situation. He was a little worried for a second that Joe could be lying, but he didn’t seem to have a single tell that he could have been.

“What had you been talking about?” Jrum asked, looking between the pair.

Vee opened her mouth, seemingly to answer, but was stopped by Joe. “It’s not somethin’ that’s exactly common knowledge. Part of why I was so surprised she knew about it.”

“But Papa said Listeners get to know about it! And shouldn’t Watchers too? And Jrum’s one.”

“And I’d have to agree with you on that part.” Joe replied. “But I believe you mentioned you’re still trainin’, and that seems like the thing to wait ‘til you’re fully fledged to learn about.”

Vee huffed and crossed her arms, slumping in her chair. Jrum looked between her and Joe, now even more confused and wishing he weren’t in the dark about… whatever they were discussing. “Can I at least get some vague clue about what it was?”

“You could, but I believe if you learn a little, you’ll want to know more, so nothin’ at all may be best for you.”

“What if I promise I won’t ask anything else?” Jrum suggested, trying to also give pleading eyes to Joe in hopes he could be convinced. “At least if it has any connection to what happened to Dad?”

“Well, I suppose it does.” Joe started to speak, getting Jrum hopeful. “Alright then. But you’re promising you won’t go lookin’ into it, alright?”

“Yes! I won’t! I’ll just imagine my own answers or whatever!”

“Okay, and Vee, you better not help him along.” Vee nodded, staying silent and even pretending to zip her lips. “We happened to get on the topic due to how Grian ended up messed with due to the mixin’ of magic from he and Grifter. Magic from Watchers and Listeners mixin’ together’s got a special term. And that term comes from when it first happened, specifically on a rather large scale. Despite that, it’s a little bit taboo to talk about the incident itself, and Vee happened to mention somethin’ implyin’ she knew about it more than most.”

“Oh. So like… how Dad talks about stuff when he was younger, and so everyone kinda just says that it’s when he was in highschool, but not any specifics?” Jrum offered as a sort of comparison. Especially since he and Jrum didn’t know as much about that time as the other Hermits did, so it was a similar situation for Jrum himself.

“Now I think that’s a fine comparison.” Joe complimented the bot. “Includin’ the part that he’s probably the one who should be tellin’ you about it. Or someone else older than you.”

“Vee’s older than me.” Jrum pointed out, reminding Joe that he was literally only a year old due to being a robot. “So she could count.”

“Now I’m sure you know that isn’t what I meant.”

“Yeah, I was just joking.” The bot huffed. “I said I wouldn’t ask about it more.”

“Um, mister Joe sir?” Vee carefully spoke up, hiding a little when Joe looked over to her and said she didn’t need to use formalities like that. “Why can’t you just help his dad? Because you’re… a thing I can’t say to Jrum.”

“Hey, I know he used to be Herobrine.” Jrum pointed out before pausing. “Well, I mean he technically still is? He goes by Joe now, but was it just a name thing, or is it a concept or-”

“The nuance of that matter isn’t a highlight of this discussion right now.” Joe said to keep Jrum from overthinking things. “As for your question Vee, despite any connection I have to what you tend to refer to as Hels, my involvement in this situation isn’t one that was ever foreseen as direct involvement. That being said, the situation also isn’t one that everyone is so sure it is.”

“Wait, what do you mean it’s not what we think it is?” Jrum asked. “My dad has been kidnapped and based on what everyone is saying, he’s missing a gigantic chunk of his memory. How is it different from that?”

“Jrum has a point! Why’s it not that? Is it because Grifter is trying something we don’t know about but you do?”

“Grifter’s involvement isn’t exactly what’s causin’ it to be something else. And as far as the Hermits and you are concerned, it is what you think. But there’s plenty of other people involved.”

Both kids looked confused before Vee gasped. “The other Watchers and Listeners! Or at least the Listeners, I don’t think Grifter could lie to the others as easily. But he must’ve done a bunch of lying to them! And… and Astrid and Flora and everyone was with him too! They’re being lied to as well! I need to call Astrid again so she can help!”

“Now slow down. I believe you already did talk to her about that, now didn’t you?”

Vee frowned. “Well, yeah, but now we know more so she needs to know more!”

“Vee’s right.” Jrum agreed. “But also shouldn’t do it yet, because she mentioned something to me.” Joe gestured for Jrum to continue after the bot paused for a moment. “You know how Vee keeps mentioning she and Astrid were adopted? Well, apparently before Astrid got adopted, she lived in the Hels version of Tommy’s server because her brother was the admin. Her brother was Nightmare, Dream’s Hels.”

“Now that is something we didn’t know yet.” Joe conceded. “Vee, you said your sister didn’t get along with her brother when you talked about her at the meeting, right?”

“No, he was really mean! He hurt her and Flora and her whole family and even tried to do it to me once. He was just as mean as my mom was.”

“How much does your dad know about Nightmare?” Joe asked, Vee answering that he probably knew more than she did. “Alright, I’ll need to go back into the meetin’ to tell the Hermits and others about that, you two take some time to rest before you go back into trainin’ alright?”

“That sounds like a good plan to me.” Jrum agreed before standing up, stretching, and then starting to go towards a nether portal. “If you need us, we’ll be at Daddy’s base. Dad’s portal is too dangerous.”

“Perfectly good reasoning.” Joe nodded, waving just before the two were whisked away by magic into the Nether.

“Uh, Jrum?” Vee asked shortly after they had stepped out of the portal and into the hub. “Did it seem like he knew more about what’s going on than he said?”

“Huh? Oh, well, Joe is always like that. I think it’s a mix of him being so old, being a poet writer whatever, being a Hermit, and probably five other things.” Jrum shrugged. “Plus, he probably does but doesn’t want to tell us just yet because they want to know more about it themselves, or because we’re younger. Or heck, maybe even both at the same time.”

“Huh. Okay I guess that makes sense.”

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