#I'm practically housebound

[alren-ki]

.

[garden-of-mancers]

Do you have any examples of when you would want to send out an imaginary friend?

I do! I don't have any suggestions for a specific time to send an IF out, (I'd usually send one out overnight or for a few days, just whenever I felt the impulse to do so), but I do have examples for why you'd do it. Also, most of these suggestions are based in magic and witchcraft-flavored spirituality, so I understand if this stuff is really Not relevant to everyone.

A couple specific examples I can think of are as follows:

If you want them to become more autonomous or eventually leave you for good, sending them out is good practice. I know autonomy is more of a goal in traditional tulpamancy, but in my experience, having an IF who's done a few tasks unsupervised makes lucid dreaming with them a bit easier? In this case, sending them out is like a practice exercise; it's just one of the many activities you can do to increase their ability to act alone.

If you have some kind of mystical or non-material thing you want your IF to retrieve for you. Maybe you accidentally left another imaginary friend at an outing. Send your IF out to go get them! Does your IF come from another land where they have unique items? Send your IF out to go bring you some! (And you might spend their time away crafting the actual items for them to give you when they return.) If you've lost an item, there are many superstitious solutions to help you find them faster. Some I've heard of are astral projecting to look for the item, visualizing yourself finding it or having it, and saying the name of the item and sticking a sewing pin in a couch cushion. Well, why not send your IF out to look for the item? Who knows, it might turn up once they've returned. (And if it does, you can say your IF told you where to find it or that they put it there.)

If you just want to be alone. If you're doing a ritual or meditation that requires solitude, (something like the hide and seek alone creepypasta is the only thing I can think of off the top of my head lol), or if you're burned out socially and you need to make sure you stay alone, send them out. Sometimes when I'm in a bad place mentally and want to fight with everyone, it was nice to tell the one person I could control "We need some space" and let her vacation halfway across the world for a bit. If you think about them while they're gone, you can remind yourself that they're at the lake or whatever. And if they pop back in anyway, you can always say, "Hey, aren't you supposed to be at the lake?"

One psychological perk of having an IF is that you have a degree of control over them that you cannot exert over other people, pets, or headmates (if you're a system). I'm not saying this in a "you're my servant and you have to do what I say" kind of way; just that being able to create something, decide their appearance and traits, and have them come and go at your desire gives an IF's creator a level of autonomy and control that can be beneficial to your mental health. As an action, sending an IF out has the benefit of a caring act (packing, walking them to and from bus stop) AND asserting control over your environment. Hence: easy mental health hack.

Yes, I get that you can *technically* just make your IF disappear or stay in your headspace/inner world/wherever IFs go when they're not currently interacting with you. However, I prefer having near-omnipresent IFs. I'm unemployed and housebound, so it's not obtrusive for them to be there hangin out 24/7. So, whenever I get overwhlemed or DO want some alone time for more than a few hours, why not turn my IF's absence into a game or a part of their lore and experience?

And my final reason:

Just to let them go on an adventure! Honestly, I only started doing this because I had a travel journal that I never filled. I'm too disabled to travel now, so I would just send my old IF out to various locations and then write her adventures in the journal instead lol. It was a really cute journal! I wasn't gonna waste it lol.

-♥️-

(Sorry if this was overexplained or sounded patronizing. I am an overexplainer over text; if someone asks for clarification, I want to make SURE you get your answer the second time 'round 😂)

TL;DR: Sending an IF on an adventure by themselves can make them more autonomous, give them an active role in various magic spellwork, and provide psychological benefits for both the IF and the creator.

[llycaons]

I’ll make this my last message since I don’t want you having to spend all day on another 15-paragraph essay because that’s just sad. I’d just like to state a point that apparently didn’t come across in my original message—one I didn’t think I *had* to state—which is that fanfiction *isn’t* published fiction. It’s amateur, free content on the internet and shouldn’t be held to the same critical standards and practices as critiquing trad pub fiction. That’s why it’s bad etiquette to, say, put fic on Goodreads, for example. Again, didn’t think I’d have to say that to someone who obviously spends so much time (so, *so* much time) reading fanfic, but here we are!

And just a note: if it’s ableist to say the word “weird” to you specifically and insinuate you, specifically, should go outside—which I *know* you do, I literally used to follow you lmao—then I sincerely apologize. That being said, I *know* you go outside, so I fail to see how that’s a broader shot at the housebound when… you are not. And I know that. And it’s shitty that you’d turn around and banter with your mutual who’s calling me a cunt. That’s fair game somehow, but “weird” is too far? Ok lol. Guess your pearl-clutching over what’s problematic only goes one way. Good to know 👍 Will hard block then! Cheers

it's a good thing that this is their last message but since they're hard-blocking it feels like a waste to even answer this one. I don't even have any other arguments since I was so thorough and said everything I wanted and ig they have no actual rebuttals so I'm taking this win. 'don't want me to spend all day writing 15 paragraphs' yeah right, they just don't want their argument to be DEMOLISHED again lmao and I don't think it's sad, I like covering all my bases. man I smoked that one. and I didn't spend all day on it, it took like half an hour? I was at work all day man lmao. and now I'm being held responsible for things other ppl have said? I mean I stand with my mutuals, but I literally never said that stuff in the actual reply

like I never said fanfic was just like real books, I just said you need to be held responsible for what media you create? did anon even READ my carefully crafted responses? friends. I am bereft. they're asking like this was an obvious oversight on my part but it's just inane to act like not being published equates to freedom from all criticism, which is what I SAID. it's not formal criticism, it's just what I think. you remember thinking? I can't turn it off! and since when was my SINGLE page a goodreads account?

as soon as they pull out the term 'pearl-clutching'...man how did this cunt used to follow me. that's right. I didn't even call then a cunt earlier when kiera did (WHAT bantering??? I posted my response AFTER I got this message) but now I WILL. you gotta be careful about who you tell to go outside, anon. and calling ppl a cunt isn't ableist lmao and I think it's perfectly reasonable in this situation. also if they used to follow me wouldn't they know my views already? what did they think would happen??? and since WHEN was saying cunt problematic???

and furthermore I appreciate the apology bc the comment about my tagging WAS out of line but irrelevant. my bigger complaint was more that 'weird' was a really vague criticism of my behavior. like nothing in ANY of those messages was compelling arguments that I should feel bad about what I was doing they just kept leaning on the morality of the words 'weird' and 'strange'. also just because you used to follow doesn't me you know me as a person?? ugh I just have to call them a presumptuous cunt again I'm afraid.

however this is bar none THE stupidest person I've ever argued on anon with so I will be sorry to see them go. it was so easy to win their weak, unsubstantial, shame-and-normalcy-based but somehow unapologetically amoral arguments...well it looks like I've written another lengthy response but that's fine, I like to chat on my blog to my neighbors and friends and anon shan't shame me out of that one either. how are we all this morning.

[dio-the-thot-exterminator]

Can I have a list of some of your favorite obscure horror movies so I can watch them at some point?

Of course! hehe not sure how obscure these films actually are, but I like them, and people don’t talk about them enough 😞

Housebound (2014) [so fun, so silly!]

Die Säge des Todes (1981)

Ticks (1993) [YEEEAH buggies]

Starry Eyes (2014) [god tier blood, grime, and UNEASE]

The Suckling (1990) [yummy creature design]

Broken (2006)

The Initiation of Sarah (1978)

The Beast Within (1982)

Terror Train (1980) [i like miss jamie <3]

The Premonition (1976)

The Unborn (1991)

Squirm (1976) [more bugs! cute lil worms]

Don't Go In The House (1979)

Satan’s Little Helper (2004)

Prophecy (1979)

We Are What We Are (2013)

Don’t Go Into The Woods (1981)

Graduation Day (1981)

The Incredible Melting Man (1977)

Jason X (2001) [This movie is solid! Everyone’s such a hater 😡]

—

Oh! Then I have some films that are more popular.

The Brood (1979)

Tokyo Gore Police (2008) [mouth watering practical effects!!!]

A Reflection Of Fear (1973)

Trouble Every Day (2001) [This actress man, just WOW]

Repulsion (1965)

Pieces (1982)

Triangle (2009)

—

Now I wouldn't call these obscure but i like them so much, and any chance I get, I will tell people to watch them 🥺🥺

Possession (1981) [One of my favourite movies of all time! The story, the acting, the effects UGH. Gagged me for sure.]

Dead Alive/Braindead (1992) [Honestly up there with Possession. So good but in a completely different way. It’s high camp, high gore, and it felt like i was high while watching it]

Lake Mungo (2008) [A movie that actually scared me while i was watching it, and stuck with me for a good week. Triggered my fight or flight like no other. rawr]

No One Lives (2012) [This would run all the time when I had cable. And I'd sit and watch it every time this came on. There are...certain scenes that are just burned into my mind]

The Cell (2000) [I don’t even know what to say. The visuals in this movie are just SO GOOD. I want to tongue kiss the entire art direction team. The costumes, the cinematography, it’s so creative and so lovely]

—

I have to give a mini shout out to Lucio Fulci, he is my favourite director. Period. If you’re interested in his movies [some focus on zombie, slasher, Giallo] his Gates of Hell Trilogy is always a good start!

—

Ah alright now onto production companies [yay? Woohoooo??]

Troma. Fucking Troma, a lot of the movies they make are gross, stupid and cheap. So if you want something that’s absurd but still strangely entertaining. I’d recommend looking through their catalog of movies, picking a random one and seeing what happens.

Full Moon Features <3 If you want some film series, I’d recommend Puppet Master and Subspecies! [I’ve seen every Subspecies]. Full Moon has a lot of killer doll and toy films. But they do branch out. Castle Freak kinda wild though.

—

Ok i'm done now.

If you have any movie recs for me, send them my way :D

[ahedderick]

Bones

I'm trying to figure out a tactful, reasonable way to call my neighbor and ask him to give me the bones after he butchers the deer a family member got for him yesterday. Because his normal practice is to have someone (he is in a wheelchair) haul them up in the woods behind his house and dump them. Which is, ecologically, a sound thing to do. HOWEVER he really, really doesn't want my dogs crossing the boundary line into his woods. And that area is within a few yards of my barn. So it is next to impossible for the dogs, however good they have been trained to be about the boundary, to resist wonderful, delicious bones right there. If I could just dump them a little further uphill, the dogs could enjoy them without bothering him.

(and how does he know if Lady walks through the woods if he's housebound? He has game cameras up.)

Feels like an awkward thing to ask, though. Please, Sir, may I have some bones?

[coldgreengrapes]

After MUCH handwringing (and consultation with my occupational therapist lol) I decided to join the fencing club during their fall term! The main wheelchair team practices on Shabbat, so I believe it'll just be me during the Wednesday night class. Mr. Olympian Club Owner and Ms. Paralympian say that the able bodied students will simply take turns partnering with me.

I'm still a bit nervous, and reasonably so as there can be extreme consequences to me overdoing it (last time was 3 months bedbound and 2 more months housebound). My private lesson didn't trigger an unsafe symptom exacerbation, however, so I'm going to try and see! I miss athletics and dance and HEMA stuff very much, so my hopes are higher than they should be haha

[hellolulu]

[Spoilers about Eda's storyline below]

Do you know what I love about Owl House?

It's that not only is it extremely lgbt+ representational, and not only does it point out the flaws in organised religion and with a focus especially on the witch hunter era, but it also touches really well on chronic illnesses.

Specifically, I'm talking about Eda's curse.

It started as a teenager, her mother became so overcome with finding a cure for it that she lost the point - that it's Eda's curse, and what Eda wants to do is what should be important - and Eda ended up feeling like she tore her family apart because of simply having a curse.

Now, disregarding the origins of the curse, her arc is extremely relatable for the chronically ill. She can't control it, it gets worse under stress, she's often exhausted because of it, she has to take potions to keep it in a manageable condition, and most of all, it can't be cured.

Even when the curse is halved at the end of season 1, it's not gone, just returns to a stage that is more manageable again. Like having a surgery; it isn't necessarily going to cure you, but it can give you more time, or make your illness more manageable for a while.

Then, again, during season 2 when she accepts her sickness, she says something along the lines of "I may not like it, but you're a part of me", which I think is also mentioned during the episode with her mother. A big part of having a chronic illness is that point where you have to sit down and face the fact that you are sick, and probably always will be sick, and that acceptance is necessary in order to keep going on. It's something very personal and very relatable for a chronic illness sufferer to hear, and on top of that, it was an extremely beautiful scene to watch. I cried many, many tears.

And even as she "levels up" and becomes a harpy-lady, it doesn't stop the curse from having negative side effects - she can still no longer do natural magic, and the curse corrupts natural magic she takes part in. And on top of that, she still has to take potions to keep it under control, and still gets tired out by going into the harpy state. The curse still affects her in negative ways, but accepting the curse means she's able to forgive and allow those parts of herself, instead of rejecting them. That does wonders for your mental health.

Her illness is magical (as per being part of a children's TV show), and can be used to help the plot and spun in that "my illness makes me strong" way, but she's never 'cured' - she simply finds ways to deal with her illness that suit her. Using her illness to fight bad guys, only to become extra tired, is just like what me and my older sister refer to as "mission mode", which I think is something many chronic illness sufferers can relate to - that decision to do The Thing you need to do, while knowing it'll take all your energy for that day - possibly longer -to do it (maybe it's calling the doctor, maybe it's doing housework that has piled up, or going to the corner shop to buy more milk - it could be anything, for anyone).

I just think Eda is a very good example of chronic illnesses and how, even if you can find the right medicine, or get the right surgeries, even if you can live a practically normal life, your illness won't just go away. It stays a part of you, and accepting it doesn't mean you've lost to it. (Granted, season 3 hasn't come out yet, and who knows if she'll be cured then. I actually hope she doesn't get cured!)

Anyhoo, it probably wasn't intentional, but it's something that has made me, and especially my housebound older sister, feel seen. It's just very cool to see it represented in a character as badass and confident as Eda the Owl Lady. And also to see it represented in someone who is regarded as an incredible parent. Disabled people way too often are made to feel like parenthood isn't an option, but she manages it with style, and she's the ultimate bad girl too! Seriously, I've got massive love for this show for so much of its character representation. I could go on for days talking about it!

[cult-of-lilith]

My anonymous confession:

I'm genuinely scared that I won't make another irl friend.

I make what I think are friends but then we never speak again when we don't have forced proximity.

I'm scared of being left alone once my 2 allo friends find partners and I don't, and then I'll have no one.

Anon I feel the exact same way, I'm practically housebound and I have absolutely no friends nearby. Loneliness is scary and I wish I had help I could give you ❤️

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Strong feelings right now about a lot of things and I'm simply not going to talk openly about most of them at the moment because I don't have the capacity to do so in a way that feels safe and helpful for me.

But here's what I will say.

As both a mental health care provider responsible for the process of diagnosis and a patient of mental health care providers, can I just emphasize that the first time your patient finds out a diagnosis has been added to their record should never ever be because they looked at their portal after the appointment concluded.

I had a psych session with a new provider (this info is critical because this man has interacted with me for all of 45 minutes total) and at no point during our session did he give me ANY indication that he intended to alter my diagnostic profile or adjust my treatment plan.

Nonetheless, he did so. With an extremely stigmatized diagnosis that has a high risk of doing harm to me in a medical setting.

This is irresponsible for a number of reasons. The first is simply that if he had told me he was considering the possibility we could have discussed it and I could have provided additional context that might (would) have indicated a differential diagnosis. At minimum I would have had warning that I might need to prep for or even contest the diagnosis. The second irresponsible aspect is that I have an extensive history of medical trauma which HE WOULD KNOW if he'd spoken to the intake provider or the therapist who I work with at the practice, both of whom have met with me for longer than he has. And by issuing me this diagnosis he has just increased my risk for further medical trauma while upholding my PTSD diagnosis and being fully aware my PTSD is severe enough I am housebound without a service dog at present.

I meet with my therapist today and license wise she doesn't have the capacity to overturn what he's done but she can help advocate for me, so that's what I'm going to have to hope for. But either way I'm frustrated. Because UNDOING a diagnosis is SO MUCH WORSE than preventing it from going on a record unnecessarily in the first place. It's not even like he had no other diagnosis to treat me under. He could easily have included in his documentation that he wanted to continue to assess for the possibility of it without including it as a diagnosed and confirmed conclusion.

Diagnosis isn't a fucking joke. And we shouldn't be passing them out, particularly stigmatized ones, without an adequate conversation with the patient about where it's coming from and why it's happening. In my case, I am exceptionally confident the diagnosis is wrong. But even if it weren't, I deserved to be told to my face and not to find out after the fact through my diagnostic chart on the portal. That's cowardly and unethical, and frankly I have very little respect for a clinician who does it.

[thedevillionaire]

Thanks for your ask!! I'll get to it! Let me ask you for 2, 7, 10 and 15 if I may? For Cerb? 😗

Also thank you for your kind words about the list. 💕

Just read your (excellent) answer to my ask, your list is fab and you're more than welcome, and I'm finally back home and able to answer stuff properly now! 😄

2) What do they look like when they don't feel well? Do they dress up to cover up? Do they tend to look sick when they are?

Cerberus is practically unable to not be stylish, and when sick he will maintain his usual appearance/outfits as best he can - which is pretty damn well, actually - if he's leaving the house at all. Casual observers probably won't notice much different, if anything, since his general presentation hardly varies. Those who know him well, though, will absolutely pick up his tells - there's a loss of intensity and acuity that anyone familiar won't miss, and his famously piercing emerald gaze is softened, almost...tamed, for want of a better word there. If he's sick and not leaving the house, he's probably sartorial housebound elegance in dressing robe and silk pyjamas. Rumpling may increase with severity of illness, time and, um, cognac or merlot, probably, lol.

7) How do they trust people? Will they give themselfs up for someone else?

Going under the cut at this point...

It takes a lot for Cerberus to truly trust somebody - he doesn't trust quickly or flippantly, and he usually needs to know someone for a while before genuine trust is fully given. This isn't borne from expectation of betrayal so much as expectation of incompetence, though. But mostly, he's just not interested in sharing personal details with more others than he does - he neither sees a need for it or a point to it. However. The small set of people that he does trust, he trusts deeply. He's immensely trustworthy himself - it's one of his greatest qualities, IMO, actually - and tends to expect the same from other people; if he considers you a friend, he won't tend to question it until/unless proven wrong about this. And although he'll absolutely help his inner circle of friends as best he can for the most part, the only person he would truly give himself up for is Kia, and he would do it without question.

10) Are they easily flustered?

Not at all. It's not like it never happens, but...well, it almost never happens, lol. He's just not that way inclined.

15) How do they deal with loneliness?

An interesting one, this! Cerberus is a fairly naturally solitary person, and he doesn't tend towards loneliness much at all. He enjoys his own company, and can be quite comfortable for long periods solo, actually. Where loneliness does affect him is in moments of remembering past loss, or longing for someone's company who's gone from his life, for whatever reason. But he does tend to snap himself out of it fairly quickly. Any other moments of wishing for company probably just equals "missing Kia right now", lol, and that's usually sorted soon enough!

[businesscatfelix]

5 thinks i like.... tagged by @punkspike

definitely cats (this is obvious i think). i have cat themed everything all over my house. i have cat themed dish towels, cat sculptures, cat themed bed sheets.... i even used to have a doormat in the shape of a big fat cat :-) cats are my most favouritest guys ever + i love dem

i think the next thing is pretty apparent if we are friends it is plushies.. i have a plushie collection that i am constantly adding to and being told by my family to reduce the size of. i like to collect both character plushies (like ralsei, jiji from kiki's delivery service) but i also collect plushies i just think are cute or funny. my favourite plushie right now is a matrix themed build a bear his name is NEOTHEMATRIX. i currently sleep with a djungelskog tiger. :-)

sci fi horror movies. i am a big fan of getting scared in a fucked up sciencey way. my all time favourite movie ever is john carpenter's the thing. nothing can compete with it. however alien comes pretty close. i like when the movie is yucky and slimey and practical effects are a must for me. i like to be fascinated/enthralled by the movie and also disgusted by it ^__^

working with my hands to make things. this is kind of a hard thing to nail down, it's not quite "art" or "creation" but the act of using my hands to manipulate objects to create something at the end.... from cooking to sculpting to beadwork to braiding hair.... i just enjoy using my hands a lot! i get a lot of satisfaction from art forms where i'm actively touching and interacting with a physical medium which i think makes my decision to be a primarily digital artist a little silly!

and finally i enjoy spending time with my friends ! being chronically ill means i'm quite isolated from society bc i'm quite literally housebound a large part of the time so the internet is a cool way for me to talk to people i love. and i love doing it! :-)

i won't tag any usernames but if you're my friend and you see this i'm tagging you! >:3

[j-digital-archives]

⭑˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ The Unemployed Elegance Diaries: Navigating Life's Chic Chaos ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚⭑

Hey, darlings! Today has me feeling like I've run a marathon with these minor house chores. Being in this jobless state is boujee only if the coins are flowing, but when they're not, it's like being locked up in a whole new kind of struggle. Seriously, the urge to hit the town, maybe check out a museum or do some chic cafe hopping is real, but the funds aren't vibing with that plan. And let's not talk about the non-stop rain—it's practically on a mission to keep me housebound.

But on the flip side, I don't want to be a couch potato. The ambition is real; I want to strut my stuff, clock those 10,000 steps, but this situation is playing hard to get. Currently, I'm trying to summon the energy to dive into some anime. It's a whole mood, and let's be real, everything's triggering my lazy mode, even my stomach growling doesn't motivate me. Ugh, whatever! I'll just vibe with the process, trust the universe, the angels, and throw in a sprinkle of divine trust. May good things rain down on me. Signing off for today, adios!

[witchywellbeing]

Good morning! Another day another #witchywellbeingchallenge prompt, and today we are practicing gratitude

I was very generic with mine, I am always grateful for my husband and cat, but I'm also extremely grateful for my wheelchair because without it I would be housebound

Also @kalynnicholson13 uploaded the perfect #talktober video, so check it out, it was great!

What are you grateful for?

[standfortheangels]

Hobbies: you and Mike :D

Send one for the Mun and Muse to have a conversation comparing...

(I'm gunna be real... I misread this meme X) I missed that it was ic writing- but I put that meme up and I shall deliver! I'm going to do a Stan Lee for these and pretend I'm a character in their universes rather than being their Creator, so, I'm still me and what I say in these is true (minus the basically housebound element, like I will have to pretend I go places and talk to people >w>"), but we're A- removing the chance that they'll either get mad at me over their story or have an existential crisis, and B- making it so that I Don't already know everything about them. Otherwise it'd be more like an interview than a conversation.)

(For this one, I'm going to say... We're sat on opposite benches at the park. I tell my family to go on without me so I don't overdo it on walking. They can circle back and I'll leave with them, but in the meantime, I'll just sit and draw. I decide to draw the guy on the bench across from me. At one point, I stop looking up and down and instead focus on making the wobbly sketched lines of the bench look like actual wood planks. When I look back up, he's suddenly gone. Then I hear a voice close by...)

"Woah- hey that's great!" His sudden comment makes me jump. When I realise it's my missing model, I start to go a little flushed. He chuckles. "sorry to sneak up on you. I had a hunch you were drawing me, so I wanted to look."

I attempt a chuckle of my own, but it comes out more like a heavy, nervous breath. "Yeah, sorry. Did I make you uncomfortable?"

"What? No! Don't be! I'm honoured." he replies, resting on the back of the bench. "I'm Mike, by the way."

"Nice to meet you." I reply, and immediately falter. "Should I uh, label you?" I ask with a nervous smile, sort of pointing my pencil at the sketch. With his own, much more confident and unwavering smile, the man shrugs slightly and says, "Sure~" I scribble 'Mike' off in the top right with a little arrow.

"So uh, how much art does it take to get good like this?" He asks happily. I let out another chuckle-breath and reply, "a lot.", And start going back into the lines of one of his hands to tweak the shapes just slightly.

"I believe it." I don't look back over my shoulder, but I can tell he's watching every movement. "You know I draw a little too. But, not as good as this." He laughs, and I smile.

"Well, the point isn't to be good," I say, hoping my tone is cheery enough to match his (though that'd be a challenge), "it's about doing what you enjoy. And when you enjoy it enough to do it like, 6 days a week for 13 years or so... That practice tends to add up." He lets out a short breath and shakes his head slightly, but I can't quite read exactly what that means. Does he not believe me, or is it that I just made myself sound obsessive or something? Crap. But then..

"I can't imagine having that much dedication to that kind of skill. Though I guess when it comes out this good it's probably easier, right?" he asks with a little chuckle.

"Well, it doesn't always." He makes a sound as though he's about to object, but I cut in, "trust me, there are pages in every sketchbook that I hope never see the light of day."

"Perfectionist huh?"

I look up at him for a second, but get right back to this sketch. "No, not quite. I just.."

"Just need to rework that one finger for the eighth time?" When I look up this time, he's giving me a different kind of smile; mouth closed, brows raised, head slightly tilted. It's a little coy; Like he thinks he's got me in a corner. Which.. may be the case, as I'm not coming up with an answer to his call-out.

"Alright. Fine. Maybe I'm a little fussy with my lines." I say, no shame as i put my pencil back to work again. He gives a short laugh. The kind that sounds like a little overflow of happiness. A pure sound.

"Hey, at least you have passion, right?" He says casually. "I mean, you must have to put so much into it." I give a little hum of agreement as I move on to fixing his hair. "Everybody should have something they love like that." What a nice sentiment. "Something to help them unwind from the day, no matter how bad it gets." And that was a slightly Concerning sentiment. But, he still seemed happy. His eyes don't betray a hard day's experiences, if any existed in there. Instead, they looked at this artwork almost with boyish wonder.

"You know, if you come around this side and sit down, I could draw you properly. Do a little portrait for you."

"Really?" He straightens up a little. I give a little nod, and he steps around the bench, but pauses. "You're not going to charge me are you?"

I smile and roll my eyes. "No, don't worry. Im not like a boardwalk artist. Just, someone who draws."

"A lot." he tacks on with a cheeky smirk as he takes a seat. I roll my eyes again.

"Yep, a lot."

"So. I'm guessing you don't have time for much else, huh?" Ah. Maybe I did make myself sound obsessive. I make a little noise of disagreement, but before I can speak, he says "And don't tell me you paint. That's just art again." He has such a playful smile on his face that I can't help but smile back.

"No, no. I have painted before but, not really my thing."

A couple of quiet seconds pass as I start roughly sketching out the shapes in his hair.

"You do any tabletop games?" he asks me.

"You mean like dnd?"

"Yeah~ That, or, Clue, or Risk or Catan.."

"I- don't even know what that last one is to be honest with you."

In a sort of old kung-fu movie sensei voice (at least I think that's what he's going for), Mike straightens and says "Ah, I have much to teach you." and grins. "But for real. I play a lot. If you're looking for people to play with, I'm your guy."

How should I even respond to that? We don't know each other, I don't even think I told him my name, and now he wants to go play board games? I guess those thoughts were written on my face, because he follows up with "Or not. I mean, I get it if you don't want to go up against the master~ it seems like you probably don't spend a lot of time on other stuff. No offense."

"And switching up a game is a ton of variety?" I offer with a teasing glance.

"Actually, yes, yes it is." He pulls another short laugh out of me at the.. almost mock look of pride he has on now. At least until he breaks and laughs back. "But seriously. Variety is good! You gotta do all the things~" I don't have the energy for even half 'the things', but, I don't want to pull him down talking about all that. Not when he seems so enthusiastic. Ultimately I settle for just repeating "All the things." In sort of a half question, half judgy tone, which doesn't seem to bother him in the slightest. "Go on then, o stranger of enlightenment," I keep the smile on my face, hoping that comes across as lightly as I meant it, "what is it that you do for fun out of 'all the things'?"

"Oh all kinds of things!" He leans forward as he speaks, and though he isn't exactly in my face, I lean away slightly, his enthusiasm just taking me by surprise for a moment. "There's the tabletop, video games, all kinds of movies to watch, bars to hit, parties to go to, I like to jog..."

"Oh, God, really?" Now I'm definitely judging. "You actually run voluntarily?"

He laughs again. "What, what's wrong with running?"

"It's running, that's what." I'm smiling again now, but shaking my head while he chuckles away.

"Yeah, so?"

"So... Ew!" My pencil is now floating uselessly above the paper so I can give this.. jogger my full attention. "If you engage in that kind of thing for fun, I mean, there's something wrong with you. Not even kidding." (A lie, but a playful lie.) "You'd never catch me out there, with those little shorts on that people wear, hopping from foot to foot through the rain just to get back where I started."

"It's not always raining, plus- you can wear whatever you want to wear!"

"Well I choose my pyjamas, so I can relax at home, not exercising thank you very much~" Again, I he laughs, and my eyes flick back to the sketchbook finally to continue. This.. might actually be miles better than the distance drawing. Because this man has the brightest, most persistent smile I've ever seen.

[lovecanbesostrange]

Hiii!!! Random question, but I just saw a trailer for it, and I was just wondering if you are looking forward to M3gan? I can't imagine how much more of the movie will be a surprise than in the trailer, but I personally enjoyed Malignant, and this is the same screenwriter, so... Just curious to see your impressions!

Yep, saw the trailer and hey, it's a creepy AI-doll, I'm in. The trailer like so often showed a bit too much. Just this inkling of "I'm not letting anything harm the girl" should have been enough. Where you already know this will backfire so hard. That bit with talking about vegetables was satisfyingly eerie already. We all sometimes need to do unfun things. Also sometimes people get hurt by accident. Showing those extra creepy movements is better advertisement than showing the use of the nailgun imho. But I guess there is room for some gruesome moments in the finale. Not expecting a groundbreaking masterpiece, but some fun enough by the numbers rogue AI horror. It's almost misleading that James Wan is mentioned as a producer, since he's not the director. But the director - Gerard Johnstone - did this very bizarre horror comedy called Housebound, so I'm hopeful. The crew list has lots of good names.

Also! I'm not sure if I ever responded after I asked if you had seen You Might Be the Killer, but I enjoyed it! I don't like too much blood, but going into it, the blood fit the type of movie it is, so I wasn't too bothered. (Or maybe I'm getting inured, heh. :D) Alyson Hannigan is ALWAYS amazing, and I love how it did the classic setup at the end. Anyway, I enjoy reading your takes on horror movies, just wanted you to know! :)

Ahahahahaha, YMBTK is funny. Good watch with The Cabin in the Woods and The Final Girls, to get into all the typical tropes. Although it's weaker than the other two, there is some real love for the slasher genre.

As for blood... if it's just blood, I'm still here to say "yes, put it everywhere". But I kinda do not need to see where exactly it's coming from. The latest Texas Chainsaw (which overall was really bad) had a scene with Leatherface sawing his way through a whole bus of victims, which is probably the first time the title was done true justice. It was all about the insane amount of blood and some screaming, nothing too detailed. Honestly, a movie I consciously avoid at this point is Terrifier. Art the Clown is already an icon, that's fun, but...... nope, I do not need to see that. Kudos for how absolutely disgusting practical effects can be though, I guess?

[angiethewitch]

I feel like people gloss over medical related trauma a lot??

Like I've never been directly hurt by doctors but I've been traumatized by illness.

When the swine flu outbreak happened, I caught it and I nearly died. I got really bad, really quick, and I ended up in hospital, close to death. My family was very worried and were preparing for the worst but I somehow managed to pull through. I lost a load of weight in that time and I came out of it emaciated and my immune system was shot. The swine flu completely fucked my immune system and for years I got ill pretty much every time the wind changed direction. If someone coughed near me, it was pretty much guaranteed I would get ill, and it was actually pretty dangerous for me to be out. When I mentioned this to my therapist a while ago she said that I seemed traumatised over it, and I realised that I was.

Not long after that, I broke my hips and that was just horrible. I was in agony and since then, my body has gone downhill. I was on crutches and mostly housebound for about 7 months. I think breaking my hips kick started my disabilities, because after that, I broke my ankles 3 times in the space of a year. All in all, I spent about a year and a half on crutches. That was incredibly traumatic as well.

Because of the swine flu, I'm severely immunocompromised and I never really recovered from it. It's why this new pandemic is so scary. It reminds me of when I nearly died the last time. I'm really ill now and it's terrifying.

I've been traumatised in other ways too but people never really talk about medical trauma. It's a whole other set of symptoms. If you've been traumatised by medicine related stuff, I see you and I understand and empathise. I know this outbreak is scary and triggering. I feel what you feel. Practice self care in these times and take care of your body. If you need to turn off the news and detach yourself from what's happening, it's okay. Do what is best for you, take care of your mind as well as your body.