#I'm slowly but surely learning how to do vessels.

[robinsceramics]

bee cup! I made this by glazing with yellow, brushing on an oxide for the dark bees, waxing over the two yellow patches with the bees on them, and waxing the two bees which are in yellow on the brown side of the pot, then dipping the pot in brown glaze. The drips are where the brown glaze went over the yellow glaze.

[image description: a ceramic cup with a yellow interior and brown exterior. The exterior has eight bees on it: six fuzzy little brown bee images on patches of exposed yellow, and two golden bees on the brown side of the pot.]

[iisasarcasticlittleshite]

Hi, this is my first time requesting anything on this site holy fuck.

could you write a Sukuna x M!Reader? it's a struggle finding any lol. I don't really have anything specific in mind but it would be cool to read a fic where he's not to OOC and lowkey treats the reader like shit, but it's completely up to you hehe

I am so sorry this took so long! I re-wrote this like ten times before finally deciding to just keep it simple and spicy!

Be warned: This is Sukuna people, it toes a line, it gets suggestive, no actual smut though. Proceed at your own risk.

You groaned, reluctant to be awake at this hour, much less to the sound of someone sneaking into your room. Again.

'Dude, it's like 8:30, what're you doing in bed?'

You cracked one eye open, scowling at the pink haired vessel stood over your bed. He had no idea what the hellspawn he hosts does to you after dark.

Yuuji has total control of his body, most of the time, except, as you've learned, if he sleeps too deeply. Sukuna can occasionally slip through, and though he can't go running wild and waking up Yuuji, he can, and will make his way to your room, and keep you awake until all hours.

You won't be telling Yuuji about this because the poor guy would trip over his own guilt, so this leaves you here, sleep deprived at eight in the fucking morning.

'Sleeping, what's it look like?'

'If you don't get up Gojo-sensei's gonna come poor water on you again.'

You whined, driving your head into the pillow before reluctantly throwing the covers off yourself. 'Fine fine, stave off the blindfold demon.'

Yuuji chuckled, throwing your uniform at you, followed by an apple. 'Just hurry up, you promised Maki you'd spar with her today.'

'Oh fuck!'

Eyes wide, you dressed in a panic, hoping the adrenaline would help wake you up. Sparring with Maki is not something to be half asleep for. Never mind that you only had ten minutes to meet her.

Yuuji rolled his eyes, throwing an apple at you next, oblivious to the fact that he's the reason you've been struggling to be a functional human being.

He's also the only reason you manage to get to any one class these days, so as far as you're concerned, he evens out his evil twin pretty well.

'You were impressive this morning.'

A sigh left your lips, spitting into the basin as you hurriedly finished brushing your teeth. 'Evening to you too, your majesty.'

'Attitude, brat.' Sukuna purred, his claws brushing across your bare back, watching the shivers shoot down you spine and the gooseflesh ride in his wake. 'Why you bother covering up during the day is beyond me.'

'I'm well aware of your opinions on shirts, Sukuna.'

Slowly, you turned to face him, wary of any sudden moves the curse may interpret as an attack. He's half naked, as usual.

His upper lip curled in a sneer, sharp teeth almost reflecting the moonlight pouring in through your window. 'Ridiculous things, how you fight in them is beyond me.'

'Is that true? Or you just wanna show off?'

Over the weeks that Sukuna's been paying you these night-time visits, you've grown desensitised to the danger you're actually in. You know you'd be dead if he wanted you dead, so why not have a little fun with it?

The curse's grin could have swallowed you whole, his hand suddenly clasped around your throat, forcing you to his eye level with his other hand digging into the flesh of your back, leaving you to wonder of he drew blood.

'You like what you see, twisted little brat.' His breath fanned your face, presence looming over you. You can feel the power rolling off him in waves, power you couldn't possibly rival. You were helpless compared to this creature.

So why go out crying?

A smile curled your lips even as he restricted the air in your lungs, making your head feel floaty. 'I'm starting to think you do too. You haven't killed me yet, bastard curse.'

Sukuna laughed, and now, you're sure he's drawn blood, you can feel it sliding down the curve of your back in tiny rivulets from where his nails broke your soft skin.

'You don't have the power to back up this kind of foolishness, boy!' He snapped.

Your heart stuttered with the growl in his voice, and despite any kind of better judgement, you melted into it further.

'Then why come here every night?'

'Why haven't you told the sorcerer?' Sukuna countered, his grin turned knowing. 'The brat, the Six Eyes, any one of them could stop me from doing this, you've had ample chance, and you've told, no one.'

You averted your eyes, ears growing warm as Sukuna eased his grip, only to yank your head back by your hair, teeth and tongue assaulting your neck.

This. This is why you've told no one. Gojo would know in an instant that you'd let the King of Curses in your pants, or worse, Sukuna would tell everyone himself, and you couldn't stand that kind of embarrassment, even if the choice had been amazing sex, or die.

Sukuna laid you out on your bed, stealing the breath from your lungs as he nipped at your ear lobe.

'You'll tell no one brat, because you're mine now.'

[softie00]

Healing

pairing; yeonjun x reader

warnings; fluff, insecurities, angst, reader feeling not good about themselves, physical appearance, boyfriend yeonjun being cute, words of affirmations, comforting, showering, negative thoughts, cuteness!

words; 1k

a/n: for myself and everyone else who feels the same way and need comforting. ❣ likes/comments/reblogs are appreciated ☺

summary; you've been neglecting yourself, crippled by insecurities which causes you to distance yourself a little from your boyfriend yeonjun. but for how long?

You don't remember when your own thoughts started to consume you. Little by little, a staggering gush of water that carried each of your insecurities forming a tremendous flooding.

A flooding that doesn't require people to let notice of prior nor detects its danger. Why?

Because it's made way to your vessels, the comfort of your body, building it's way up until it feels uneasy. Sinking each of your organs and most of your brain. Alas, it's nothing new for you. These types of flooding have always occurred within you many times.

Slowly you've welcomed these moments of floods, some particularly more usual than other days. And today was one of those days too.

I feel ugly

I feel worthless

I'm not good enough

I'm never pretty enough

I don't fit the standards of beauty

Do I deserve to feel happy

Ugly

Your mind is corrupted by these thoughts so often. Some of your own and some of others. Growing up, always experiencing the rough side of things which includes your appearance. Attacked constantly for how you looked, being told you're not good enough and you'd never find anyone to be with you.

Although it's been years, they still visit you. Sometimes when you just admire your boyfriend Yeonjun, they creep up and deliver whispers inside of you. It doesn't help with your boyfriend is the most gorgeous man you've ever laid your eyes on.

The one that steals everyone's attention by just simply existing, whereas you were the one who people acted like didn't exist.

It's not his fault, no. As much as he's attractive as ever, he has his moments of insecurities too which you've always kissed away.

You haven't realised you've slowly neglected yourself. Sure, you still get up and do certain things in the day but it feels burdensome. Though, you may have unknowingly distanced yourself from the one you truly loved.

Yeonjun

"Yeonjunie wants cuddles," Yeonjun babbled with his soft voice. His arms already making it's way to your waist, pushing his warmth on to you your back. He moves his face on your neck, trying to get a reaction out of you.

It's a bit late in the night, with Yeonjun just returning home. He had practice and today he felt so knackered. All he thought of was running back to you and cuddling.

He nozzles his nose further more, hands tightening at your waist, "Y/N, are you sleeping?" He quietly asked.

No response.

"I'm sorry I came home late we had so much to learn today," He explained whilst yawning mid way, "All I kept thinking of was coming home to my princess and giving you a big fat cuddle."

He noticed you gave no movements yet still spoke on, "But seems like you already sleeping," Yeonjun kissed the back of your head, "Good night baby have the sweetest dreams."

After a while, you opened your eyes. A tear escapes as it sinks down your face. You weren't sleeping. You was awake. You felt guilty with a heavy heart. The fact that your boyfriend wanted to cuddle you and you resisted, purely because your stupid mind thinks you don't deserve him.

He's way too good for you.

Even though his touch made you falter for a minute, you froze to talk. And then it all come flooding down.

Your behaviour only becomes apparent as days go by. When he initiates touch, you somehow redraw yourself or make yourself so busy that he doesn't have to ask. And somehow, you thought it'll work.

Not today.

You was walking until you heard Yeonjun calling out your name, "Y/N, I need help." He shouted from the bathroom. So you made your way there thinking what could be happening.

As you entered the room, you saw him in the shower with a hand on his eyes, "What happened?" You asked in concern. Making your way closer to him until he drags you inside with him.

"Yeonjun-"

"I missed you princess." He murmured against your neck, with his body engulfing yours. You almost forgot how nice it felt having him this close. Hearing the words come out of your boyfriend's mouth instantly forming guilt.

You tried to change the subject while you looked to the side, "I thought something serious happened with you-''

He lifted his finger above your chin, making sure your facing him directly. Something you've been avoiding these days too.

"Is you not running away from me serious, Y/N?" He asked, holding your gaze. You felt a sharp pain in your heart hearing these words come out from him.

He wasn't annoyed but more so had a worried look, which softened as he goes on. "What's going on, my beloved? Speak to me, let your thoughts flow like this water, I promise you won't drown, I'm here."

You know you can't escape him for any longer. The soft nature of your boyfriend has yet again made your heart burst. How dare your mind play these tricks on you when someone cares about you so deeply?

"I'm sorry Yeonjun, I'm s-o s-sorry." You stuttered, bursting into tears instantly. You knew this was wrong of you to do yet you listened to your mind all these times. "The thoughts i k-keep having, not feeling good enough, feeling ugly, not deserving of you." You blurt out, letting the flood in your mind out once and for all.

Yeonjun's heart broke hearing your words, knowing you've been carrying this weight all by yourself. He instantly grabbed the shampoo pouring it over his hands, then lightly massaging your scalp.

It felt relaxing, probably the best you've felt for all these days you've had.

"It's okay to have these thoughts," He affirms, continuing to massage in deeper with his bare hands. "But do you know they ain't coming from you but someone else?" He questions, making you confused.

"Coming from who?"

"Donald trump." He replied, making you open your eyes and laugh out loud.

"Babe that makes no sense, how?" You chuckled, seeing the glint in your eyes made him so happy so he continues further.

"Well, think of each negative thought that comes. Imagine Donald trump is the voice in your head saying these things, what would you respond to him?" He asks.

"I'd tell him to fuck off-"

"Exactly! Tell that orange oompa loompa to fuck himself!" He giggles, letting his hands make it way to your body, applying soap all over.

His hands felt so heavenly on your skin, all you could think of was the feeling of comfort and the laughter of what he mentioned surrounding you both.

For once, your worries that were huge waves become quiet. The flow decreases vastly, instead of feeling like a flood it passes you gently like a simple wave in the ocean.

You let the wave pass through your entire body, acknowledging what it is and letting it go.

Yeonjun knows of your insecurities, yet he's never let you feel alone with them. He noticed you've been neglecting yourself with everything being untouched, including your skin products. So he planned this out, to shower you with his gentle comforting and soft kisses he grazes against your skin as the water washes past.

That's how much he loves you.

You both got out and he grabbed a towel, patting you dry before you put your fresh pajamas on.

He sits in front of you as he grabs your moisturiser, rubbing it against his hands before he applied directly on to your face.

What did you do to deserve a sweetheart like him?

His hands delicately touch your face, removing away any tensions or stress within your mind. Almost like his hands have the power of a healer, anything he touches he heals.

This moment he's healing you. He's your healer.

"Thank you so much." You whispered, feeling ever so grateful for having such an attentive boyfriend. "I've been so terrible with you, babe."

But Yeonjon just smiles.

"I love you Y/N, so much that you're all I ever think of day and night. You consume my mind and thoughts even on the lesser brighter days and in those moments, I hold on to them stronger. Because when I see your smile and cute giggles, I instantly feel better." He expresses out loud with joy, his expression becoming softer. "Share your sadness with me Y/N because I'm selfish, I never want you to feel alone. Even in your bad thoughts."

Your eyes began to tear up hearing the confession of your boyfriend. He has a heart of pure gold, whatever he says or touches turns to a positive light. Sending warmth all over your way like a ray of sun.

You immediately leaned over and hugged him. His scent from the shower still lingers radiating comfort. You let yourself embrace fully into him for the days you couldn't, how soft and cute your boyfriend feels.

He pulls back, making you stay seated infront of you as he shares contact with your eyes intensely.

"Look in to my eyes." He orders.

Your expression was confused yet cute to him, he knows how much you struggle to look into his eyes but today he will make sure of it.

"B-but why?" You hesitated.

"Sweetheart just look, come closer." He responds with a small smile, watching you lean in to him but not so much. So his hands grab on to you, pulling you faster against him. Now all you can see is his mesmerising eyes.

"Do you see that?" He asks, patiently waiting.

You felt like you was in a trance, his eyes were extremely magnatising you as each second passes. He was shining, He was so beautiful.

"The way your reflection shines through my eyes, the sparkle of yourself in me that's only visible through my eyes, that's how you look to me. Multiple stars that rush their ways into my eyes just to witness your beauty, because you hold my universe."

You gasped hearing the sweet words laced with honey by your boyfriend. His eyes smiled and grew more in admiration of your beautiful self. All you could see yourself in his eyes was, you.

Feeling butterflies forming already, "Yeonjun, you are so so cute. And adorable and my god I have no words but thank you ever so much for being so kind with me and gentle. For understanding me and taking care of me."

He admires the way you speak, he does this all truly because he loves you. A lot. "You're cuter." He teased, "Y/N you mean the world to me. I'd do anything to make you feel ease." He comforted.

His eyes continue to linger down to your lips, as he places a quick peck on your lip. Then above your nose and to your forehead. Your heart was racing, feeling fuzzy from the gentle kisses.

"I love you, Yeonjunie." You embraced him tightly within your hold, as he did with you too. Never wanting to let him go ever again.

"I love you, Y/N."

do not copy, plagiarise translate my works or ideas. copyright ©2023 softie00

[iamnot-crazy]

Pages of Promise, We'll meet again

Chapter 1

Summary: You have always itched for adventure and when an interesting vessel appears you take your chance and jump aboard. Now the Straw hat pirates present an offer you can't refuse but before you take them up on it you first need to speak to your grumpy captain.

Trafalgar Law x reader

---

Law's initial assumption was that your boundless energy and lack of boundaries would be a constant annoyance, but since you have been aboard he learned how wrong his assumption was. Yes, you were a handful with your knack for finding trouble, and extricating you often became Law's personal headache. But he'd come to appreciate that side of you too. When you weren't excitedly soaking up new information or peppering the crew with questions for your ever-growing log, you were a surprisingly calm person.

For a good part of each day, you'd disappear, engrossed in recording the Heart Pirates' adventures. Your passion seeped through the pages of your beautifully illustrated log, showcasing your love and thoughtfulness for the crew.

It wasn't until he saw you gazing at the Straw Hat captain with the same unwavering determination you'd had when you first boarded the Polar Tang that Law realized what he'd taken for granted.

The Straw Hats each have their own fascinating stories and ambitious dreams and you listen in awe. You scribbled furiously in your smaller travel notebook, capturing their every word so you could later transfer it to your larger masterpiece. Your pen barely kept pace with the torrent of tales they poured out.

Law's frown deepened as your eyes glowed with a familiar spark. Sure he didn't want you on his crew at first but he'd grown attached to you, and so had the rest of the crew. From your cheerful good mornings, while whipping up breakfast to your one-on-one sessions with each crew member to write their stories, you have become an indispensable part of their lives.

But what Law appreciated most was your silent companionship. He'd often find you tucked away in a quiet corner, diligently writing and sketching while he read a medical book, the rhythmic sounds of the waves serving as a lullaby.

His heart tightened when the Straw Hat captain finally reached his boiling point. He bounded over to you, his declaration echoing across the decks, "Y/N! We go on crazy adventures every day and someday I'll be King of the Pirates! If you want to write about a legendary crew, you should join ours!"

Law's gaze darted between you and the captain, his knuckles turning white as he gripped his sword hilt.

Luffy grabbed your shoulders in a playful chokehold. "Every legend needs a chronicler! What do you say, Torao?! Can Y/N join my crew?!"

All eyes turned to Law, the air thick with anticipation. The smile that had bloomed on your face faltered. You'd been so caught up in the Straw Hats' infectious energy that you'd completely forgotten about your crew.

His jaw clenched, and his grip on his sword tightened further. "I don't control them,"

Luffy jumped up in excitement grabbing onto your shoulders and cheering for his new crew members. The others also joined in celebration making you feel welcomed and warm compared to Law's cold glare. You pulled yourself out of the straw hat's grip and bowed your head, guilt gnawing at you. "I'm so sorry, Straw Hat-ya, but… would you allow me some time to think about this?"

Luffy's infectious grin faltered slightly, but he nodded. "Yeah, but don't keep me waiting too long!" He quickly bounced back to his usual cheer, rejoining the festivities.

You felt a pang of longing as you turned away from the vibrant scene, seeking solace with your captain. Sitting awkwardly next to him, you struggled to find the words. Law finally sighed, the tension slowly draining from his shoulders. "You should join them," he muttered, surprising you.

Your head snapped up, eyes wide. "But what about the Heart Pirates?"

Law pulled off his hat and ran a hand through his hair, his gaze fixed on the horizon. "I already reached my goal. Doflamingo was defeated. I don't know what the world has in store for us next, but I do know whatever the Straw Hats' will be doing, it will be far more interesting. Your dream is to write about the new era, and I played my part. The Straw Hat captain… he isn't done."

You were frozen, your mind racing. "But Captain…"

Law stood up, cutting you off. "Just go join them." He turned away, his voice thick with emotion. He stormed away to the Polar Tang slamming the hatch shut behind him.

Just as Law disappeared in the tang a whistle pierced the air. Turning, you saw Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo approaching, their faces etched with concern.

"He seems mad," Shachi commented, plopping down on a nearby crate.

"You aren't really going to join the Straw Hats, are you?" Bepo asked, his voice trembling.

You shook your head placing it in your hand "I don't know."

Penguin shrugged. "Maybe you should join them. You're almost finished with your book on us, and the Straw Hats are going to need someone like you to tell their stories."

Bepo scowled. "But she's a part of our crew!"

Penguin sighed. "Look, Bepo, she has a dream too. Documenting the new era, the Straw Hats are definitely going to be leaders in that. It doesn't mean she doesn't care about us."

"But what about our Captain? Or do you not think he can become King of the Pirates?" Shachi interjected, glaring at Penguin.

Penguin flinched. "No, it's just… you saw them. Besides, Captain said it himself."

"But Y/N joined our crew first, doesn't that count for something?" Bepo whined.

"I just mean Y/N has served her purpose with our crew joining the straw hats would be the best for her." Penguin countered, his voice firm.

The conversation devolved into a heated debate, leaving you feeling even more overwhelmed. You excused yourself and retreated to your favorite porthole, the one offering the best view of the open sea. As you approached you found another figure leaning against your window staring off at the sea.

You smirked slowing your approach and dancing toward your grumpy captain "Anything interesting out there?" You sang leaning into his view.

Law jumped at your appearance but relaxed when he realized it was you and leaned his back onto the wall. "Nothing new." He sighed rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm sorry for being brash earlier."

You crossed your arms and smirked playfully, "You were?"

He chuckled softly, shaking his head. "But I was being sincere earlier. I think you should join the Straw Hats. But…"

"But?" you urged, your heart pounding.

He looked away, his voice quieter. "But we'll miss you."

A warm smile spread across your face. "Awe, did I finally grow on you, grumpy Captain?"

He scoffed playfully turning to his side and looking back out the porthole, "You did a while ago." He admitted.

His comment took you off guard, "What is that supposed to mean?"

Law sighed, "You might have been a little much at first but I have grown to enjoy your presence and passion."

You tilted your head, studying him curiously. "Enjoy?" Your tone was laced with surprise, "The entire time I have been aboard you have been so pouty."

He scoffed, "I have not been pouty." You gave him a knowing look causing him to roll his eyes, "Fine I might have been a little pouty but that's just because I didn't know how to feel about you."

"Feel about me? Captain, do you like me?" You playfully teased.

Law's cheeks turned a faint pink. "Forget I said anything!" He pushed himself away from the wall and started to walk off.

"Wait!" you called out, reaching out to grab his arm. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to tease. Please."

He turned back, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes softened, and for a fleeting moment, you saw a vulnerability you hadn't noticed before.

"Y/N," he began, his voice low and husky. "When you first boarded the ship, you were full of this chaotic energy, but there was another side to you that I learned to appreciate. You care so much about the crew and documenting every adventure." He reached the wall again and sat down, "The first time I saw you here, drawing and writing your stories…"

"Our stories," You interrupted with a chuckle, joining him on the wall.

Law smiled faintly. "Yes, our stories. I didn't think you had it in you to be so focused. It was… nice to hear your pen scratching against your sketchbook as I read my medical books. I think that's when I started having conflicting feelings for you."

You felt a blush creep up your neck. You hadn't expected such a confession. "Why didn't you say anything sooner?"

Law shrugged, a hint of frustration in his voice. "It's not like I could act on it. I'm your captain and there was so much that needed to be done. And if you don't feel the same it would backfire more on me."

Hesitantly, you admitted, "I would be lying if I said I didn't feel the same way. I never imagined you could feel the same." You pause looking softly at him, "So what now?"

Law sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Now you join the Straw Hats and complete your dream. Then, hopefully, one day our paths will cross again."

The thought of leaving Law and the Heart Pirates ached, but you understood his reasoning. "But what if I don't want to join the Straw Hats?"

Law raised an eyebrow, surprised. "I saw how you were looking at them, how you blended in with them."

You bit your lip. "They're constantly getting into trouble, and I don't think I'm strong enough for that."

"They'll protect you," Law reassured you.

"Just like you have?" you asked.

"No." Law averted his gaze, a wry smile playing on his lips. "With me, it was different. I pulled you out of trouble. With them, it'll be different. They'll pull you into trouble, they'll challenge you, push you to your limits, but they'll also have your back."

"But I like things the way they are here. With you," you confessed, a pout forming on your lips.

Law grabbed your chin pulling you to look at him before he pulled you into a kiss. You were taken by surprise at first but his soft lip calmed your nerves as he deepened the kiss.

When he pulled away, his eyes held a mixture of sadness and determination. "Y/N," he said in a voice rough with emotion, "go chase your dream, and when you do, we'll meet again."

He stood up abruptly and disappeared down the hall, leaving you staring after him in a daze.

Taking a deep breath, you knew what you had to do. You grabbed your bag and made your way to the library. There, in the quiet solitude, you began writing the final chapter of your time with the Heart Pirates.

With a heavy heart but a burning determination, you finished the entry, pouring your love and gratitude for your experience onto the pages. Closing the book, you turned to the empty one – the one that would chronicle the adventures of the Straw Hat Pirates. You place the new empty book into your bag leaving the completed version of the Heart Pirates book on the table for everyone on the crew to read.

With your bag full and a new empty book, you walked out of the polar tang. Outside the party, the two ships have started to die down and many lay asleep on the ground. Your eyes darted across the dock for your captain but he was nowhere in sight, before you could turn around in search of him you felt a rubbery hand wrap around your waist.

"Y/N! I see your bags are packed! Did you make a decision?" A bubby captain pulled you off the deck of the Tang and onto the deck of the Sunny.

Your feet wobble as you try to brace your new bearings. You scratch your head, "Yeah I think I did but I was hoping I could say goodbye to Law first."

"No need." Robin appeared at your side, holding a folded piece of paper. "He stopped by earlier and left you a note."

You took the paper, your heart pounding. Written on the paper in handwriting that could only be written by a doctor said, "We'll meet again."

"Hey, we should probably get going soon if we want to make it to the next island by tomorrow!" Nami shouted from above you cutting off your thoughts.

"Alright then, let's set sail!" Luffy declared, his voice brimming with infectious energy.

And with that, the Sunny pulled away from the dock and the Heart Pirates, charting a course towards a new adventure. You stood at the railing, the wind whipping through your hair, your notebook clutched tightly in your hands. The future stretched before you, an open book waiting to be filled with the stories of the Straw Hat Pirates, and perhaps, someday, a reunion with a certain grumpy doctor. A smile bloomed on your face – the adventure had just begun.

---

A/N: Wanna read more of my work check out my MasterList

[frogwithastrawberry]

Danny Phantom headcanons I just thought of!

For starters: Not really a headcanon, but I love it when people write Danny using astronomy related nicknames for his partners. It makes the brain worms happy

-All ghosts have a specific weakness tied to when they died. It is HIGHLY frowned upon to knowingly use this against someone. Like, they can recover from it, but not easily

-this weakness is especially prominent in Halfas

-Out of the three Halfas, Danny is the only one who really has the weakness. Since the weakness is based on Death, he's the only one it really applies to?

-Vlad died slowly over time due to one event of mass exposure to ectoplasm, which I'm saying seeped into an open sore like acne in his face, and then replicated said acne. While the original case healed, the ectoplasm was in his bloodstream, and since he was fully alive it was slowly over time taking over his bloodcells, until eventually one day he, just found himself with enough of it that he was able to use ghost powers, and then the ectoplasm recognized him as a ghost and stopped harming him

-Dani was never really fully alive. She has a slight weakness to electricity as residue from Danny, but it's barely more than how one would normally react to being shocked

-For Danny though, the electric shock from the portal killed him, and the Lichtenberg scars that were formed as a result counted as enough of an open wound the ectoplasm started seeping in. Since the ectoplasm crept into the scar of what killed him though, he has a weakness to electricity

-this does also mean that if someone were to die by a fire, the ectoplasm would go into burn scars. They die by bleeding out though? Well, being stabbed was going to be a weakness anyways. Someone dies by drowning, the ectoplasm takes over the lungs, since they went out of commission, etc.

-TLDR: Ectoplasm works by taking over blood cells. Souls don't have those, so they just become fully ectoplasmic beings, AKA ghosts. Live people have blood cells, and the ectoplasm seeps into whatever open scars may exist until it occupies 50-75% of the bloodstream, making you recognizable as a ghost, and a halfa.

-BONUS FOR IF YOU WANT DC IN HERE!

-the reason Jason has pit madness is because the pit is ectoplasm (as most have agreed on) and since he was a corpse, the ectoplasm wasn't sure where to go. He didn't have any pumping blood for it to take it over, and so it settled in as his nervous system. But then the ACTUAL nervous system and blood vessels started working, and they're doing they're best to push out the mysterious entity, but the ectoplasm is sentient, and therefore trying to stay. (It's losing)

-this does mean that in my headcanon Jason can either become the fourth halfa, or become fully human again, depending on if the ectoplasm keeps fighting, or if he meets Danny who teaches him to control it

-side note: If he were to become fully human again he'd likely have a shorter lifespan since his body would be used to having assistance against things like injuries or poisons and wouldn't be able to learn how to heal fully by itself again fast enough to save him.

[sam-glade]

7 snippets 7 people

Tagged by the lovely @oh-no-another-idea here💜 Thank you!

I'm not entirely sure what the rules are so I'm picking 7 snippets and vaguely matching them to the 7 people I'd like to tag.

@iced-ginger-tea

"When you're excited you burst into rooms like a summer draft." Gullin stared. He stared at the man in front of him, who had given himself to him so completely, and still found more to give. "When content, your manifestation is the breeze that carries apple blossoms from the orchard at home. When confident, it's the steady but strong wind that you can fly a kite on." He took a deep breath. "But sometimes, you're the squall on a rocky shore, and I don't know what to make of that."

@tisiphonewolfe

The heavy curtains were drawn already; the room was cool and quiet. The box of shatranj pieces sat on a small table by the wall, with the game board masterfully inlaid in the table's surface. A crystal lamp with a stained glass shade illuminated it in patches of muted colours. The silver samovar in the corner hissed quietly as it heated up, and two cut-crystal glasses waited on a silver tray beside it. The familiar setting did little to soothe Erya’s temper.

@acertainmoshke

By the grace of the Five Elements, I am a Sword. I will not raise my Weapon against another person. I will not use this gift to selfish ends, but to protect those who cannot protect themselves. I will not risk my life needlessly, for my death may lead to the injury of others. I will obey the law and my commanding officers from this moment on. This I swear on my Sword and honour.

@writernopal

“Millennia ago, I watched a boy climb a gangplank to a ship docked in this port. It was a meagre vessel, powered by warped oars. The boy had the same wonderment painted on his face, the same light in his eyes.” Amberblade shook his head. “How do you do it, Little Bird? After all this time?” “I’m me, Brother. It seems you played so many roles, that you lost yourself among them.”

@captain-kraken (from The Fulcrum)

The Soulless stands up, brushes the sand off her knees, and turns around, coming face to face with a raptor. She yelps and stumbles back until she trips and falls, her drawing now utterly destroyed. The raptor advances slowly, and turns its head to look at her, blinking its beetle-like eye. Its three-clawed feet are set far apart; they sink into the sand with each step, then drag, draw crumbling lines that point inevitably towards her. Its body tips from one side to the other, its whip-like tail and long neck provide a counterbalance. Small beige tassels sway on either side of its jaw with each movement, brushing horn-like protrusions that adorn its mandibles. The Soulless looks back at it, not daring to twitch. The raptor leans in, its nostrils flaring right next to her beak. Its scales are burnt umber, and she wonders if they would be warm to touch. It’s a stupid thought, and it might be her last one, if the beast is looking for an evening meal.

@elshells

“That was a pupil of mine, General Havyel, sir, not exactly a Dark One. My latest project, if you would.” “What do you mean, not exactly?” Erya snapped. “He’s a brilliant kid, eager to learn, pleasure to work with.” “Varré…” “He suffers from a mild case of demonic possession.” “He what now!?” Havyel blurted out. “Put a pin in that, please, General. It’s only a mild case."

@sarahlizziewrites

“What do you want us to call it, by the way?” Gullin called over from his perch on the stairs, once Lissan got half a dozen more sequences done. “What?” “Your demon.” “Ideally not that.” “Does it have a name?” Lissan grimaced. [...] I would certainly like a name. “It would like it, so it’s not getting one,” Lissan relayed. Gullin chuckled with genuine amusement. “Nameless it is then.”

[sanjilover4815]

My Personal Thoughts About a Mostly Forgotten 13-Year-Old Show

Ok so LOST, right?

I've spent the past 3 or so months watching the entire series for the first time, and now, a week or so after I watched the finale, I'm here to give my comprehensive thoughts on the entire show. (Spoilers- It's one of my all-time favorite pieces of media).

Ultimately, I ask why I'm so passionate about LOST. In many respects, I don't particularly feel like it's a great piece of media. The story itself, while interesting, can be extremely sloppy, tons of stuff gets rushed explanations or no explanations at all, and there are roughly three episodes per season (usually more) that I just flat-out cannot stand. So why, you may ask, is it one of my favorite things to ever grace the earth? Why do I cherish it like it's a perfect work of art? What exactly makes me cry when I think about the ending for too long?

Well, ultimately, LOST's themes and characters resonated extremely strongly with me personally. The story itself is a complete trash-fire mess for the most part, but it's held together by its absolutely fantastic cast of characters and the overall core theme of the show. Ultimately, LOST is a show about life, death, and everything in between. It's a journey more than it is an outright destination. I love the ending of the show, it's my favorite episode, probably, but it isn't the point of LOST. It never was the point. The point was enjoying spending time with these characters, seeing them slowly grow as people and overcome their personal insecurities. The Island, in turn, was a vessel for this. Jack's journey from being a pessimistic man of science to an optimistic man of faith is satisfying to watch because I cared about his character and wanted to watch him overcome his flaws.

To this extent, each character in LOST learns to overcome their problems and live their lives as they see fit. That, right there, is the core theme of LOST that resonated so strongly with me. The idea that your past does not define you as a person, and that you can overcome your sins and rise to be a truly wonderful person in the present and in the future. Kate and Sawyer, two of my favorite characters, are both murderers, yet they are treated roughly the same as anyone else in terms of their past. Even when the other characters learn of their wrongdoings, they're still accepted as the people they are NOW, not the people they were when they boarded 815.

Every time I think about the central ideas of LOST, my mind always comes to Greatest Hits. Personally, I think it's one of the strongest episodes of the entire show and it's the only episode aside from the last one that made me sob like a baby. Watching Charlie finally accept his incoming death as he sails out towards the Looking Glass would've been powerful enough, but it's treated as a celebration of life, not a mourning of death. Charlie is sailing to the Looking Glass with the knowledge that he is going to die. Despite Charlie being a flawed person, someone who was struggling with drug addiction, withdrawal, and aggressive tendencies in Season 2, the episode never once talks about any of that. The audience is finally seeing a Charlie that is free of his past, able to spread his wings and fly. Aside from that, aspects of his addiction are only scarecly shown in the episode, instead choosing to focus on how he actually lived his life, and his life's "Greatest Hits", as it were.

Also the scene with the ring personally obliterates me every time I think about it. Along with that, the words "The Night I Met You" are seared into the depths of my brain forever.

So, this brings me to The End. To the general public who was primarily watching for the answers to the big mysteries, sure, it was underwhelming. To someone like me, who was intentionally examining the themes of this show, it was the single most satisfying conclusion the show could've pulled. The final scene in the Church is, in essence, what LOST was really about the entire time. Everybody dies sometime, but the most important thing in life is the time you spend with each other. That's really all there is to it. It's a simple message, sure, but an exceptionally powerful one.

This has been my thoughts on a 13 year old show that has quickly become one of my favorite pieces of media ever. I'm already looking forward to wrapping up in a blanket next winter and watching it all over again.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Thanks for answering my previous ask!

I have nobody to share this with so hopefully you won't mind me sharing it here: So far, recovery has been going pretty ok for me. For now, I'm avoiding the mirror and I shower with the lights off, and those are behaviours I'll have to work on one day too but for now it seems to be the best course of action, because seeing myself in the mirror would most likely cause me to relapse. Especially since I know for a fact that I'm totally bloated right now, so whatever I'd see in the mirror wouldn't even be an accurate reflection, but my disordered mind wouldn't listen to that.

I'm currently going through the dreaded extreme hunger phase, which is partly why I'm so bloated lol. For the first few days I've been alright with it but it's like the 4th day of my mind and stomach both screaming for food like vultures and tbh I'm starting to feel kinda guilty about it. I realise that it's a part of the process and that it's good for my organism and that my body is trying to repair itself, but my ED is slowly rearing its ugly head and scolding me a ton, saying that I'll gain weight, trying to convince me to look in the mirror, etc. So far I've been able to resist and I also keep reminding myself that I SHOULD gain weight because I've been horrfically underweight all of my life and I'd be much better off at a healthy weight. The only problem that keeps weighing on me is that I have a really big issue with folds. Even though folds are completely normal and everyone who's not very underweight has them when they slouch or sit, my mind has somehow become convinced that rolls mean being fat. I'm not sure how to get rid of that mentality. If you have any ideas, I'd love to hear them.

Another thing I found out is that I might have to give up romantic relationships for the time being. Even though I've struggled with anorexia for most of my life, going through on and off phases, my last relapse and the worst I've ever had occurred after I got into a relationship. Specifically it seems that a lot of my behaviour hinges on the obsession with being "perfect" for my partner. I can't let go of thinking about needing to be as thin and hourglass-shaped as possible for my partner, and I can't let go of the fear that if I get to a normal weight and perhaps lose some of that hourglass look, he won't find me attractive anymore and will leave me. I'm like constantly horrified of the possibility of being seen naked or in tight clothes, I'm plagued by the desire to be as attractive to him as possible and then to stay exactly like that for as long as possible. I attempted to talk to him about it before considering breaking up, but he made it clear that he doesn't wish to discuss my mental health problems with me, and as much as I'd like to, I can't just turn this problem off with a flip of a switch. So I decided that I'll most likely break my relationship off and stop dating altogether until I manage t somehow fix my chain of thought. At least I personally think that's the best solution for now.

I definitely don't mind you sharing! I usually do post things my followers choose to share, since I think it can really help create solidarity among the ED community. It can show others that they are not alone, and sharing recovery tips is always a plus too!

It seems like you've got some great harm reduction strategies in place in the form of avoiding scrutinizing your body while you prioritize getting regular nutrients into you again. That's really important. I think you're right that you will eventually have to learn to be able to view your body again, but if you just need to avoid visual triggers in order to eat better, that definitely comes first. You might want to practice just falling in love with your body exactly as it is - as the vessel that is doing its best to take care of you and keep you alive.

So, for example, if you did catch a glimpse of yourself and you happened to notice some recovery bloat or other triggers, you could take time to say to yourself, "That is my body doing what it needs to do to heal me. My body is trying its best to make me healthy and well, and this is what it needs to do." I think body image issues are something shared by all people who are going through health issues, since bodies do tend to do weird stuff while they're healing. Illness is only pretty on TV, not in real life.

Maybe when your ED is scolding you, you can take some time to examine where those thoughts are coming from? Like you could say "I wonder if I should be scolded for enjoying my food as humans do?" Or "I don't think it's such a bad thing to allow my body to heal." Don't try to fight the thoughts or stop them from coming, even though they're hard. Just gently challenge those thought patterns so that you can adjust your thought patterns gradually and become more aware of them. This is what I'd suggest especially when you start thinking about things like rolls, which seem to be a big trigger for you. You can perhaps engage with the thought directly, and say things to yourself like "If I need to hurt myself to pursue a roll-free body, is that something really worth pursuing?" Keep in mind that, since you're deep in ED thoughts, your mind might respond with "yes." As I mentioned before, trying to fight off negative thoughts will only give you more anxiety around them. Instead, acknowledge them, consider what feelings are causing them. The negative thoughts will not change overnight. It will take practice.

I'd also suggest, and this may take practice since it sounds like you've struggled with fear of fatness for a long time, that you just take a moment, when you have the capacity for it, to address how you have learned to think about fat bodies. Do people who are truly fat deserve less love, less respect, less estimation of worth? Society may have taught you that they do, but I think it's time to challenge that. Again, your mentality won't change overnight, so don't beat yourself up.

Lastly, I think it's so, so strong of you to prioritize your health over this relationship. That is such a hard choice to make! But honestly, even though it's really difficult now, I think you will realize down the line that someone who doesn't want to talk about/support your mental health is someone you can't build a healthy relationship with down the line. I hope you get lots of quality time to spend just pouring lots of love and energy into yourself, and perhaps work with a therapist on some of the body and intimacy issues you've been dealing with, if therapy is an option for you. I hope that you get together with someone down the line who is interested in building a relationship based on mutual support!

[pinkprincessia-art]

It disappeared before I could reply, but I would love to see more art for Story of Evil. I found you and loved your artwork and style, so when I learned you did Vocaloid aus, I knew instantly I would love anything you produced. So in general I wouldn’t mind seeing any Vocaloid story for FE, but Evillious Chronicles has a hold on my brain so anything pertaining to that would be lovely!

My bad I have a bad habit of deleting txt posts after a bit every now and then

OOo thank you! Hearing that means so much to me!

I used to do alot of Vocaloid type of AU art, when I was younger and it was always so much fun.... and then I stopped for some reason and after a lot of unfortunate life events happened a couple of years I was like "Oh why don't I go back to doing this? I had so much fun, but do it with FE" and its been a bad case of the brain worms ever since.

The Evilious Chronicles have always been my favorite song series... at first I told myself I was just going to go based on the songs and not all of the outside lore (it was tempting! but with this being a side passion project I really didn't and still dont have the time to go and hope I could find good translations read all of the light novels and do a deep dive) But its fine because my idea was "what if pocessed by evil dragon" rather than being the vessel of a sin.

I ended up choosing mostly Nohr siblings (because bias) minus Elise because she is too pure... and I think it ended up being pretty solid. Daughter/Servant of Evil - Corrin Twins (obviously... it really started because I craved a love triangle between Corrin Laslow and Azura.... and it fuels me.

I actually have plans to add illustrations for the Daughter of White. It took me a while to figure out who to put in Haku's role.... and I finally decided on Felicia. It felt the most right.)

Evil Food Eater - Camilla It seemed fun.... and cannibal camilla doesn't feel wrong I ended up giving the Kaito role to Kaze (for morbid shippy purposes)

Gift From the Princess who Brought Sleep - Azura I had a hard time picking for this one, I sat on it because at this point I had already decided I wanted to stick to mostly the Fates cast if I could (minus one). And Elise.... really-really didnt fit any of them the more I played around with it in my sketchbook the more I liked it for Azura! (Also yes I through Laslow in there too because he is my fav and I love him and I stuffed in everywhere I could)

Still working on how I want her dress to look but I like sketching when I have the ideas to come back to later. Corruption of Judgement - Leo

There was just no thought, I knew it had to be Leo. Also yes it means I will be drawing Forrest as "Master of the Court"

Duke of Venomania's Madness - Xander I.. was not sure about this one! But at this point I was pretty much sticking to Royals and those with ties to Nohr. Once again I plan to draw Laslow in Kaito's role because I am predictable and simplistic like that.

Tailor of Enbizaka - F!Robin/Grima The only NONE Fates related one. I could have stuck with it and picked a Hoshidan Princess... but idk I like the idea of Robin slowly descending into madness and murdering chroms family one by one and then him.

Muzzle of Nemesis - ???? I dont remember if I've mentioned this one because I think I might have but I'm gonna try to keep it on the downlow to keep with the whole "Master of the Hellish Yard" Vibes.

Adkadoiaj sorry for the word vomit is that, this is the craziest most involved fan-project I've ever done. And its insane how much thought I ended up putting into it, when at first it just was gonna be all "Ahahha I wanna draw Art-"covers" to my favorite vocaloid songs" Now each one is gonna have a handful of pieces to them.

[saey707]

Hi! I've read all of your work and I want to say that what you're doing is very cool and beautiful! Therefore, can I make a request? Viktor x fem!android!reader. Reader was created in a country where technology is many times more advanced and modern than in Piltover and Zaun (in short, she is from a country where the subject is cyberpunk), but this country is not engaged in trade between countries. Reader was once a human, but she died, and eventually her soul was moved into the body of an android. She went to Piltover to help people. Her abilities are like the Vision from the movie "The Avengers." What would her acquaintance with Viktor, their romantic relationship look like, and how would she react to the fact that Viktor became a cyborg and began a Glorious Evolution? Thank you very much, you are our sunshine!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💖💖💖💖💋💋💋💋

✿ Prompt: You remember what it's like to be human with Viktor ✿

♡ champion focus: viktor ♡ tw: light angst ♡ Female reader

Author’s Note: Wowie, hello! I loved all the details you put into this, it really helps me to know exactly what you're looking for! ৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻) I hope you don't mind how long this is because of it. I felt like I had a lot to work off of. Hope you enjoy <3

How You Meet ♡

You weren't human. Despite the copious amounts of synthetic flesh you've tried to penetrate and slice through, you knew you were nothing more than a soul trapped in a hunk of rare, high-quality Roscian, a metal that only existed in your nation. Essentially, it permitted you to become an entity that could never die nor age. An entity that would survive eons and more.

In a way, it also made you all the more qualified to help more people. You were more willing to put yourself in the heart of danger if it means you can save even one life.

But how could you do that when your nation was safe already? It's hard enough as is to help people when you live in a utopia shut off from the rest of the world!

With no connections or people to go home to anymore, you left.

And the day you found yourself in Piltover was the day you intrigued a scientist who wanted nothing more than to study you and your properties. He was a curious, young scientist named Viktor. In fact, you yourself found him to be... intriguing.

Frankly, Viktor was the only human you ever had any interest in educating. You tend to shut down whenever anyone tries to ask questions about your home and your people.

"You're brilliant..." He spoke slowly, holding your hand in both of his, observing the joints as they moved.

It was the synthetic skin attached to the metal that bugged him. How was he to further understand and observe the machinery if he couldn't see the mechanics underneath!

"So was it your mind that was transposed into this vessel?" Viktor asked, jotting down notes as he turned his head up to observe you, taking your chin into his fingers. "The soul." You responded. And when he scoffed, Viktor didn't even bother to write it down.

"Yes, okay... I'm not quite sure I believe that one."

"Magic, spirit, and science can all interconnect from what my nation has learned." You informed him.

"Hm... I like that." He grinned. And for the first time in a long time, you found yourself returning the sentiment.

Your Relationship ♡

Your relationship is all but ordinary with Viktor. If anything, it was exciting being able to learn so much with your partner! You had grown so used to evolving and adapting your mind to work and learn alone. And Viktor had always been the same way. But, the two of your found yourself collaborating more, inventing new ways the both of you can change the world for the better.

In the beginning, the two of you were far from physically affectionate. And it was only because you both were so inexperienced.

With time, the two of you would come around to sharing your first kiss! From there, it would only snowball into Viktor showering you with loads of affection. What can you expect? He is extremely touched-starved.

It's okay though because you are more than willing to smother him with all of your love when you notice him being touchier than usual. Honestly, you perceived Viktor as a cat who occasionally needs all the attention on him at random intervals throughout the day. He can go from being super needy, clingy, and in need of all the kisses and cuddles in the world to entirely focused and locked in on his work in his little cat corner in such a short span of time!

His favorite things you do for him definitely involve you running your fingers through his hair and holding his face in your hands while you pressed your lips to his face. Anything that involved your touch was something that he always cherished!

Your favorite things that he did for you were unconventional in a sense. It was the little things he did that made you feel something beyond your Roscian shell. How he would spend an evening with you to check up and care for kids, finding quick and innovative ways to heal ailments on the spot. How he would always make you a glass of sweet milk in the kitchen, despite your protests and reminders that you wouldn't be able to taste it because of your outdated receptors.

You especially loved the way he would upgrade your framework and program every time he came up with a new idea, even just to test it on you! It made you feel included... Wanted, if not, needed.

You needed Viktor as much as he needed you.

He made you feel human again. In a way, the love and adoration the two of you shared reached beyond your cold and unfeeling body. It touched your soul, filling you with an unfamiliar warmth, comfort- a shelter.

Anything domestic the two of you did together only made you feel more grateful.

Leaving each other encouraging little notes from the academy to your medical center with Viktor had grown to be your favorite part of your relationship with him! "You can do it!" "Be sure to oil your joints if they squeak!" "Meet me outside the observatory at 7 tonight." "You are as gorgeous as the first day I met you." "I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

You grew to love every little sentiment, the notes you passed to one another piling up and spilling over at the edge of your desk.

With every new note you received, you only realized more and more how lucky you were to find someone like Viktor. After years of being coupled up in your own bubble and mind, you found your human half once again. Someone who wanted to help people just as much as you. And he may not have wanted to help people in the conventional, moral sort of way, but he still had the same goals you did.

Viktor's Evolution ♡

But all of these amazing things would only draw to their temporary and inevitable end.

Viktor strived for greatness. He obsessed over it in ways that you never really understood.

And you noticed the way he looked at you in awe. Not because he loved you sometimes, but because he wanted to be like you.

He knew the skies themselves weren't even the limit for you. And it made you great. It made you unstoppable, especially when you were able to constantly evolve and change and adapt in ways humans themselves couldn't.

In a way, you knew he found a fascination with your ability to do such from the beginning.

He didn't wish to remain stagnant. He always strived for change, improvement, and... evolution.

So when Viktor decided that one dreary day to push this idea- This... Glorious Evolution... What else could you have done other than support him?

It didn't stop you from voicing your woes though.

"What if I forget what it's like to be human again?" you whispered, eyes closed as he pulled your face before his, "I won't let that happen."

"I'm scared," you spoke. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

"What if you forget me one day?" you asked as he cut into his metal forearms, rewiring his ligaments once more. "I could never even think to do that. How could I ever forget you?"

With each and every upgrade Viktor committed to himself, he himself transformed into a being that was no longer recognizable. No longer human.

Together, the two of you were starting to no longer feel human.

But at the very least, there would be an eternity open for the two of you to share with one another. Where you can both help people and transform humanity and people's lives for the better. Eternity for you to build a Glorious legacy, side by side and hand in hand.

...And perhaps an eternity for you and Viktor to learn how to be human once more.

[limerental]

I found another likely to remain unfinished wip that I figured I should fling into the void. It was intended to be a larger fic ending in a youthful romance but I got intimidated and then distracted.

Dermain (the deaf elf who dies in the sewers in twn) lives and encounters Dara on the boat to Xin'trea

content warning for mentioned fantasy racism and persecution

The boat rolls on an uneven sea, disorienting in the dark of the hold. The meager warmth of the lanterns are kept close to the weakest and sickest among them, the rest left in blackness. Most are strangers but cling to one another like kin, hushing their fitful moaning. 

They are safe. They are alive. 

The grief catches up to them at last and rolls like a wave.

Dara finds himself unmoored among them, able to forget a moment that he is the only one among them who has boarded this vessel for reasons other than finding asylum in Xin'trea. Dijkstra's tedious preparations repeat over and over in his head. He must not forget that there is work to be done. That if he is caught out as a spy, his elven blood will not spare him the gallows.

But it is impossible not to share in the atmospheric weight. He too has long been a refugee. He too has known far too much loss.

He stoops beside a boy curled down into himself, body gripped by the swell of sobs threatening to be overcome by retching. Dara touches his shoulder, and the boy jerks up, faint lantern light shining on his wet cheeks. His skin is dark, and he wears a ratty blanket over his head like a cloak that slips back as he startles. He is not so young as Dara thought, near his own age or older, but his chin wobbles like a child's. He stinks like a sewer.

The boy stiffens, looking embarrassed, but then the ship rolls again, and he groans weakly against a rise of nausea.

"If you breathe deeply, it helps ease the sick feeling," Dara says in a low voice. He had learned the trick to quell nausea as a boy on fishing trips, lying shrugged down on his belly with his face against the curve of a rocking boat, breathing past the scent of fish guts and brine, knowing he would soon have to leap up to help his brother and father reel in the nets. 

His brother had still been alive then and had often clasped him by the neck, shaking him and mocking him for sleeping on the job, even as his thumb swept in soothing circles against his skin and their breath deepend together.

His family had been foolish not to leave Cintra behind sooner. They had yet had hope. They had nothing to do with Filavandrel or his uprising. Surely Calanthe would see sense. Surely things could not get worse.

In the belly of the refugee ship, the boy looks at him blankly. He touches his ear and makes a strange gesture with his hands, then touches his ear again.

"You can't hear me?"

 The boy repeats the motion, touching beneath his ear. He touches his lips and then his eyes and gestures again. Dara understands. If the boy can read lips, it is too dark to do so.

Dara recognizes the Elder signs, once taught them by a friend of his mother's, who had lost her hearing as a girl due to illness. Though it has been many years since he's used them, he shapes a sign that he believes means I understand. 

The boy brightens, grinning through his tears, and begins to sign quickly, too fast for Dara to keep up in the dim light. 

"I'm sorry," Dara says aloud as he signs the apology as well. "It's been a long time. You'll have to slow down." Slow, he signs, palms raised to touch the other boy's frantic hands. The boy lifts one hand and signs slowly, one after the other. Letters. His name.

Dermain.

"Hello, Dermain," says Dara, echoing the movements, their palms brushing. "I'm Dara."

Dermain's grin falters as the ship rocks, queasiness taking him, and Dara demonstrates how to breathe deep and release the breath slowly. They echo one another, breathing together.

Dara clasps a hand at the nape of Dermain's neck. He remembers his brother's laughter and the clear blue sky above his head. 

"We're headed home," he says. It is good to pretend for a moment that it is so uncomplicated. That he has not been paid to infiltrate a city he swore never to return to. That he is no different than the other refugees, terrified to hope. 

Home, Dermain repeats with the flex of his fingers, again and again. Home. Home. As if he says it enough, it will be true.

The journey from the port of Gors Velen to Xin'trea is brief, only lasting through the night, but it is long enough for both of them to fumblingly tell their stories.

Dermain tells of the dwarf-run bank in Gors Velen where he had worked for years without trouble. The city had long been sympathetic enough to elven kind, their coin as good as any. But things had soured and gone tense in the wake of the Nilfgaardian and elven occupation of Xin'trea. First sneering and slurs and then violence.

He tips his head toward the light of the lanterns to show the marred wound of his ear tip.

From fight in a tavern. A human I drank with for years cut me while her friends pinned me down, he says, delicately touching the scab. I thought she was my friend.

"I'm sorry," says Dara, and Dermain shakes his head.

I don't use them for much anyway. He grins, or tries to, his chin still trembling.

"You cheeky shit," Dara says with the breath of a laugh, and Dermain echoes him. Both nervous to make a humored sound too loudly in the mournful quiet of the ship. It feels too soon to express anything but grief for what has been lost.

Dermain tells of his fear, his reluctance to leave behind his livelihood and belongings, his rented room above a bakery, meager but his. Perhaps it would get better.

It had not.

They came for us at the bank. A raid. He tells of escaping into the sewers and the slow slog to Oxenfurt, full of lurking danger. I could have died in the tavern. In the bank. In the sewers. Others did. More will.

He signs painfully slow so that Dara can follow or maybe because it hurts. Because it is too heavy to say aloud. 

I was afraid. I was afraid I would be alone.

"Not alone," says Dara. He does not know the sign so shakes his head, meets the other boy's eye as he grips him by the shoulders. They sit cross-legged shrugged close together. Breathing in sync. 

Dara tells his own story as best he can, knowing the telling itself is a catharsis, even if he does not have the skill in elder signs to help Dermain understand.

He and his family had lived for many years in a community of non-humans on the outskirts of Cintra. His father spoke often of his home, Shaerrawedd, the Marble Gardens, far more beautiful even than Cintra, which had been razed by their own kind to keep it from occupation. They had had hopes of coexistence, hopes that were dashed like the skulls of their children by the Cintran army. He had lived in hiding ever since, only surviving through luck and circumstance and the compassion of strangers. 

Some of your family may be in Xin'trea, says Dermain. 

"Yes," lies Dara, remembering the choke of his father's last breath and his mother's screams, his brother's bloodied hands, his sister's limp body. "Someone might be waiting for me."

He does not tell Dermain about the girl in the woods, about Brokilon. He's yet to tell anyone. He does not tell Dermain about Dijkstra, who had once been one of those compassionate strangers, returning now for a favor in return. He does not share that he is terrified and uncertain, that he's sure what waits for him at the end of this journey is nothing but continued suffering or even death.

He lets himself forget all of that a moment and breathes in the hush of the hold.

Hope, Dara thinks as he presses his forehead to the other boy's, has a similar weight as grief.

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Recently, I've had this feeling related to my writing. It's like, I know what kind of things I want my writing to achieve, but I cant picture the shape or form it should take. It's like I'm lacking a vessel to hold everything I want to do with my writing and my characters (not sure if I'm explaining this well, since it's a pretty confusing feeling for me too). Do you have any advice?

I think what's going on here, and you'll have to send another ask if I'm off base is:

You know what you want to do with your writing, but you don't know how to do it.

And, well.

Every creator is there at some point or another.

But functionally, what you're asking, if I'm correct, is...how to write at all. And that's not a simple, easy question with a simple easy answer. And I'm not sure how else to explain that you have to try making a pot to figure out how to make a pot.

You can have all the theory and technique and ideas in the world, but at some point you have to just give it a go and write and slowly adjust what you do based on what you end up writing, the same way you would with pottery. If you move your hands that way, you get that cool pot lip you want. If you write this kind of scene, you get people screaming loudly at the pages. But how to write the scene or move your hands is something that your body and your mind is only gonna learn by actually doing it.

I think you just need to get some practice trying some more. You'll be okay.

Being dissatisfied with our art and striving to reach ever loftier goals is just part of what being a creator is like for many, if not most of us.

[theartblockcentral]

RE; Of all the things that I know

30.08.23

Of all the things I know, there is only one question that seems to ring in my head with the same warmth you can get from drinking too much wine.

Is it really worth ____?

I had a fight recently with my ma ( which was longer enough ago that I remember but do not care enough to delve into ) after which we had a long chat after. In this, she mentioned, the key to a successful relationship, the key to things, the key to life is, Is it really worth all of this?

Not so much in a grim, is life worth living kinda way, but, yes, I suppose also like that too. I mean, that is how I used to value the question, and in which my life was an internal silence that hurt more than anything. It wasn't an internal peace. Life felt like scraping the inside of my mind with a metal dish scrubber and then filling my skull with hot sauce- that level of discomfort- but the vessel I was in, the vessel I was, has so little value, it became my own dead-weight. My therapist tells me that being depressed and baking in your bedsheets is a way of the person cocooning themselves from the outer world, and she's right. To this day, I'm not sure of what I was scared of... but I think maybe it was the question of whether my actions, whether the way my mind worked second by second, was worth keeping going. I felt like I polluted myself.

Nowadays, after six months in Italy, it's so different. Days feel like days again. Friends feel like people again rather than some kind of puzzle I had to solve. Food tasted. Noise sounded. Things came together as I slowly returned to earth.. and in all that time, I really did learn what was worth doing to keep me going.

While I was away I had a small episode on a night out. But because this wasn't a one time thing, and because it worried everyone and put myself at risk and I ran home, lost and confused, because emotionally I put myself back into survival instinct mode, they turned their back on me. It took enough gaul to apologise. At home I wouldn't have done. I just would have assumed that is what people kinda do my age. It's hard for me to see past myself sometimes when I get into the state of feeling alone, but I knew it was worth it to apologise wholeheartedly, to admit my mistakes, and to keep moving.

Some of the things that have been worth giving my time to to feeling more present have given me hope and meaning. I have friends who are worth the time: they are no effort, they are time well spent, and a part of my world. I go hiking, and get in touch with what my younger self would have loved: she is worth fighting for. Most importantly, is the seasons changing.

Back in England, the sky is so blank and white it collapses in flatly, rendering the world into a tiny white tent. It can get very depressing. The days are dark and cold, the nights are dark and colder, and it all seems to be in a small fish bowl of a place. However, what keeps me going, as a small practice that I so happened to glance upon in Wabi Sabi by Beth Kenton was how people pay attention to the changing of the seasons, and how their are more like 18 seasons than 4. However, after a long and stressful day, I ask myself;

What were the trees doing? Have they changed colour yet?

Was it cold? Did I dress for the weather? (Another thing I've learnt- life is improved the minute you dress right for the weather)

Did I see how the branches moved? Did I hear/ see birds etc?

Did I even leave the house? Sometimes I haven't. It's not such a problem when it's not such an outside kind of day, but to be honest, we are outside creatures. Sifting through my memories of all i've seen and pinpointing tiny things like that that I may have only seen out of a window once that day helps me grapple with the idea of being alive.

Ooh, here's a shocker. You can have an entire social event, day at school, meeting with friends, day at work, night out or dinner Without something bad happening. I have NO EFFING CLUE why this has taken me so long to realise, but to be honest, I never had a stable friendship group, a completely un-chaotic household (love them), day at school... everything went wrong a lot, and problems and whatsuch occured and I guess I was just used to that? The moment I realised was when I went to a birthday party of a friend in Italy, and nothing went wrong. I didn't feel bad, No arguments occured, no one got too drunk, everyone got along, no huge chunks of gossip either. Spoiler: people actually live like that. I loved it. It's helped me not be so afraid of planning my birthday, and I didn't make a scene this year. And it was perfect. It's really never worth being in a place where nothing goes right ever. You've just got to keep moving until you find it.

Conclusively, the answer to the question, Is it worth it?

The answer is yes.

I can't believe I'm finally saying it.

yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

The people are worth talking to, the world is worth experiencing, even the sad and scary bits. Hey, you do learn at some point. You've just got to keep moving.

Aaaaand the arguments aren't all that. Not everything is worth being said. If you love someone, even if they don't love you, it is worth telling them, because that takes big effing balls to do, and admit you're willing to give a piece and never stop giving. But arguments, fights, all that, most of what you need to shout at someone, isn't worth it. Leave in peace physically or mentally. Vent to someone, move on from that person.

make it worth it.

[magicalgirlfumiko]

The door of the Go Dollhouse Store was slammed open. Jitsuko slowly limped her way into Makoto's shop.

"I...have news." Jitsuko said as she kept her hand on her bloodied leg.

"I'm not sure what I should ask first...What happened to your leg or the news?" Makoto said as she entered the main room of her store.

She went over to a small cupboard, where she kept various magical herbs and healing potions. This was low grade items, as she was not an alchemist and only really used them on herself.

"Ow...that stings.:" Jitsuko said with a wince as Makoto removed the bloodied part of Jitsuko's cape.

"Relax. Your injuries are minor. What the hell did you run into that you decided to travel half way across town to see me?" Makoto asked.

"The rumors...of an assassin...Are true. Ever since the Cult's attack on the mall...Someone has been actively slaying inexperienced magical girls. I had managed to study some crime scenes before the police got involved. Everything has a pattern. A decapitation and a force that hits like a tank." Jitsuko said.

"So, what you are telling me is this. A magical girl that believes that she is doing some kind of mercy killing by taking out weak magical girls? Seems extreme, even for Furuzeki." Makoto sighed.

"Sensei, I know that you don't like me asking for a favor...But I need someone experienced with heavy blows. May I borrow Hana's help. It's the only logical thing to do." Jitsuko said.

"I can't do that. Every time a Doll is used in combat, you risk adding pieces of your soul to it. Remember. I am a Necromancer. You're a woman that is a vessel for important heroines of the past. The magics won't work." Makoto said.

"B-But...I'll need someone to help me out. I couldn't possibly ask for Fumiko's help...She's a symbol of hope....And Hotaru cannot last for five seconds without shouting at someone...."

"I'm sorry, Jitsuko-san. But for the time being, we have to wait and learn more about who this girl is exactly. If you rush these investigations, something even worse might happen. Now rest. I can't let the daughter of my best friend get any more injured than she already is."

Jitsuko crossed her arms, "You know that has been my focus for months now. I had the foe within my sites! I know how to deal with her. You're just worried about the backlash from the Agency, Sensei."

"This has nothing to do with the Agency. When you hype focus on something, it becomes an obsession. I cannot in good faith allow a child to get killed just because she had one chance encounter with a foe that is clearly as smart as you are!"

[inexchangeforyoursoul]

Whoops I forgot to post, save organize these, so the blogging will be a mess/// one volume at a time though, one at a time

SO ANYWAY, second one.

Bring tissues and something to lower blood pressure because some parts will have the goo in your vessels boiling and not everyone gets their just desserts - yet.

One thing to point out in general is that this volume is very flashback heavy and all of these are depressing, really. The order of things is basically as follows: crying, laughing, gay, mission impossible, intermission, well shit, angry, and crying. Has a snot framing, if you like.

I'd say it's a solid 8.0 as the three flashbacks come with a windfall of flavor text, though this is also the reason they are enjoyable short stories of their own. I wasn’t all that into the middle one, though. Maybe obecause of its fragmented structure. Oh, and gay rating is 5 bc there's like one kith but then not really. It's the only real breather in the whole shebang so savor it.

So, quick characters update. But mostly for the supporting cast because Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are doing their usual shenanigans and gay panic until the last chapter. All in all, Wei Wuxian is hella embarrassed about tween him and slowly he's beginning his own gay panic. It's funny. Also it turns out he semi-accidentally started a revolution. As he would… and as he should. He’s also a very good teacher, I really respect that.

The first person, or rather group I’d like to talk about is the Xiao gang,,, A-Qing is among the bravest people around and I hope her and Xiao will be okay, although I'm not worried because they are in good hands. Ohana means family, and family means no one gets left behind. That's all. (Fuck, I'm crying again,,,, moving swiftly along,)

(theirs is the best flashback imo)

Xue Yang gives me like,,, especially warped Toga Himiko vibes if you know what I mean. At one point, he has no way to get the “candy” he so desperately wants and the realization is where he really goes crazy, obsessed with that victim to the point of mimicking him as best as he can. Whether it's for revenge still, or a way to make the victim out to be something he wanted him to be, OR even vica versa, envying what the other had and wanting to become more like the other(s), is left hanging in the air. He’s probably doing his own weird roleplaying gig out here in his personal shrek swamp and has long lost contact with the outside world.

He definitely deserves what he has coming, but with the little additional things sprinkled in, it is still just… sad and regrettable. I think we'll hear from him in the future, one way or another(TM).

Jin Ling is even younger than I thought?? (Fifteen instead of seventeen, dude. Fifteen. You have no business running off alone, kiddo.) and has never ceased worrying me. He's confused and angry and I don't blame him for what's happened.

Speaking of Jin Ling, the thing I want to keep him away from the most is his uncle. The other one. As in, the other one who is officially his uncle. That guy is a deranged control freak and it's definitely in him to either kill the kid himself or have someone else do it for him. Or trick them into doing it. Someone else I'm not gonna name again had to learn the nuances of these things somewhere. I hope this mofo will be the first real victim to Jin Ling's new trick, hell, I want it to be the thing to tip the scales. After all, he isn't supposed to know that.

I'm glad the Lan boys are not around to see this shitstorm. They've had enough to deal with for the time being.

I really like Wen Ning, hope he becomes permanent comic relief. Mainly because as of right now, I desperately need either that or some soft bonding time. Him and Wei Wuxian seem like the best of friends and it warms my torn little heart. I'm also wondering how they met because the Wen name certainly does not scream friendly or nice, but he sure seems to be. I imagine him having, like, the softest voice for some reason...

Anyhow, later the Wen duches do pop out of the woodworks and yeah they definitely are no good news, hell, along with uncle, they are the most despicable kind of people up till now. The reason is as simple as posing as heroes when they are actually unabashed villains

I will also disclose my opinion that young Mo Xuanyu may have been a victim of something other than just getting outed and promptly ostracized. He either made a mistake to get mad or got the pointy end of something to “help” him there. Explains it more than anything else.

Anyway, cat's out of the bag and we are kinda on the run now.

[ohleander]

9.13.22

Skim skim skim! Heres the morning skim!

I feel a lot of release after the full moon this past weekend. I'm not sure of everything I released or of everything thats yet to be brought to the surface but I do feel much lighter than I did last Tuesday morning. I feel like I'm in for a good week. Its supposed to be cool and calm.

I'm doing a good job of learning to soften my belly, whether I'm standing or sitting. Its amazing how much my muscles contract without me realizing it. I often want to learn to do a lot of things at once but I think Once I get better at softening my belly, once it becomes more second nature, I can incorporate another thing.. I still want to get into flexibility and stretching. I also want to get more into cool/ice therapy for my nerves. Either taking cold showers or being more consistent with putting an ice pack on my chest. Still interested in learning more about that Vagus nerve! Also the brain/gut barrier! Nows just the start of me learning to settle within the body I've been born in. I love and appreciate my body, she is a good vessel for getting stuff done!

Another thing I'm going to try to keep in mind is to turn my fear, even the tiniest fears, into curiosity energy instead.. does it make me feel afraid? Does my nervous system act up? Why? Whats interesting about it? Whats actually not so scary about it. Slowly but surely I really am training myself.

I believe its going to be a good week of practicing and releasing and also reflection. Its a time where I want to stay calm, stay cool and try my best to listen and stay quiet. Just because I think it or feel it doesnt mean its the idea to push into the forefront.

I'm on my way to slowing down and its been a bumpy road but Its still a road I can see where I've traveled.

One thing at a time! Stay Soft! Stay curious! Stay Kind!

LA