#IT WAS INVENTED TO STAB PEOPLE

[smytherines]

[tubbytarchia]

You, and people like you are part of the reason all the Lifers end up worrying so much about their own interactions with their own friends. The reason Scar and Grian for example were actually afraid to interact too much. You're obviously allowed to have opinions, but you definitely didn't frame it as just such, and now that you're getting called out for it, you act like it was framed that way to begin with 🙄 People like you need to just stop watching Life is you're so disappointed in how they are evolving. Many of us adored this season, and you can find anecdotes literally everywhere about how for many, this was their fav yet. Idk, it's just simple imo, don't care for it? Don't watch it, and leave your negativity out of our fandom spaces. If they stop producing these incredible shows, you'll have no one but people like yourself to be upset with.

Anon this is the funniest ask I've ever received, this genuinely reads like ironic shitpost designed to be overdramatic for comedy lovingly tailored to me. I can't believe I, yes I, am making Grian kill himself... Put that on my resume! I don't know what this says about your ability to attack me, but I can tell you something about mine.... Iguanodon tit slash !!!!

[gender-euphowrya]

forever fascinated by how far-righters seem to live in a completely parallel universe like one of them was on tv talking about ~the spread of islamist extremism~ and said people got ??? fliers ???? advertising ramadan in their fucking mailboxes?????? girl HUH??????

[velvetbeeez]

۶ৎ᭙𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒹𝑜𝑒𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒷𝒾𝓇𝓉𝒽𝒹𝒶𝓉𝑒 𝓈𝒶𝓎 𝒶𝒷𝑜𝓊𝓉 𝓎𝑜𝓊 ? ๋࣭ ⭑✮⋆˙

⊹₊⟡⋆ Allow me to dissect every fiber of your being solely based on the day you entered the world. Before that, let me introduce you to the art of Numerology, a concept as old as time…quite literally, for it depends on dates and time for its functioning. I never understood why it works, since it uses time and the calendar- human-made things…but I suppose somewhere, between the layers of inventions of mortals and god’s will, lies a crack, this sacred concept rests there…

Everyone has a numerology number which they calculate with their birthdates.

It is abysmally easy, hence my expertise in it ୨ৎ

ִ ࣪𖤐 ℋ 𝑜𝓌 𝒹𝑜 𝓘 𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝓂𝓎 𝓃𝓊𝓂𝑒𝓇𝑜𝓁𝑜𝑔𝓎 𝓃𝓊𝓂𝒷𝑒𝓇?

╰┈➤You add the digits of the day you were born and ta-da, you have your numerology number ♡

For instance, my best friend, Rini, was born on 24 (yes the month and the year does not matter)

So, to know her numerology number, I will add 2 and 4, 2+4= 6

Her number is 6.

My other friend was born on 9, we will add 0 to 9 and get 9, his number is 9

Now, I was born on 28, so, we add 2+8 and get 10, but we must get a one-digit number so we add 1 to 0 and get 1, my numerology number is 1.

Easy peasy ⋆✴︎˚｡⋆

Now comes, the shimmering, brilliant question:

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅᭙𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓭𝓸𝓮𝓼 𝓮𝓪𝓬𝓱 𝓷𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 𝓶𝓮𝓪𝓷?

The numbers tell you the planet you’re ruled by, thereby showing light to your behaviour, your life, your soul and the likes...

.𖥔 ݁ ˖𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 1

★ Ruled by the Sun. I love this one because I am a number one AAAAAAAASJSJSSKSK....Anyways, if you are number 1, you are a leader, born with a crown on your head and anger in your eyes. You are determined and ambitious, you get whatever you want with minimal effort. You shine the brightest in the crowd, attention is on you whenever you try to have it. Success and opportunity is on your doorstep at all times. You also keep your emotions and feelings within you, locking them securely and throwing the key into an abyss, frightened to show any vulnerability to anyone. You usually get stabbed in the back by people who you loved with all you had…You are glimmery, you glisten and give light and life to everyone around you but, beware, do not let your brilliance get to your head, or you might burst, taking with you, everyone else, down. You are a star, shine on...

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　

‧₊˚ ⏾. ⋅𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 2

✮ Ruled by the moon…. Well, you are the epitome of beauty itself, you are someone people stare at for hours without getting bored. Moon is also connected to emotions, you are a very emotional and sensitive being, like the softest plushy when poked a little hard with a sharp nail, tears, and bleeds cotton…You probably cry if one of your teddies falls off your bed. You are also very intuitive, you know when danger is lurking around, and you know when opportunity is near. You are also spiritual and see what no one else does, you are calm and cold, like water…Anyways, beautiful, gorgeous, calm sweetling, you are the best thing to land on earth. My friend is a number 2 and I swear on all I hold dear, she is the kindest, sweetest, though quietest, the most cherishable person ever.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　

❁ ๋࣭⭑𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 3

★ Omg, yes, Jupiter, my brother, and my dad are number 3. Guess what? Both of them are cunning and yet, wise. If you have someone in your life with the number 3, you must listen to their advice at all times. And if you are a number 3, hi there, the shining light and source of wisdom and cleverness. Jupiter is, in Hindi, called ‘The Guru’, meaning, the teacher. You literally represent the glorious higher knowledge, expansion, growth, and advisor. You are also humorous and fun-seeking, you are social, loving and jolly…But you might get unfocused sometimes because you like to do everything at once. Apart from that, you grow and you learn, you teach and you move on. You know what to do and when to do it, you are who people look up to before making a decision. Your footsteps are traced by many, they know whatever step you will take is in the right direction…

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

꩜ .ᐟ๋࣭⭑𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 4

★ Number 4, You are ruled by Rahu, which is a shadow planet, not visible to the eyes but can be associated with Uranus. In the Hindu mythology, there is a story about a demon called Rahuketu whose head was cut from its body, by a god. Rahu, being the head and Ketu being the tail. Rahu is the head, the brains, the dependable. You might not be physically very apt but the cogs in your brain turn faster than the speed of light. You are an academic weapon, a force to be reckoned with. You are loyal, disciplined, and hard-working, however, you might overwork yourself sometimes and get stubborn with your ways. Anyways, you are cunning, you know what you want, you are pragmatic and you are well, someone to fear.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

𖣂 ⋆˙⟡𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 5

★ Ruled by Mercury, the planet of intelligence and intellect. You are very social and good luck follows you like a puppy wherever you go, you are sharp-minded and intuitive, and you see through people as easily as you breathe. You embrace change and adventure. You are a social butterfly and make friends with a snap of your finger, you too, like number 4 are an academic weapon. Mercury governs versatility and quick thinking, which are key traits of the number 5. But you can find it difficult to commit to someone. You are also impulsive and can lack focus at times. But you are always quick to find your footing back. You see clearly and you act with a plan forged into the back of your brain.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

˚⊱🪷⊰˚𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 6

★ The planet Venus rules number 6, which is the planet of love, beauty, and harmony. This influences you to be compassionate, affectionate, and drawn to beauty and art. You have an innate sense of aesthetics and a deep appreciation for the pleasures of life, whether through relationships or artistic pursuits. You are draped in laces, silks, and the likes, you make even the ugliest piece of clothing into a piece of art. You are the aesthetics of a Sofia Coppola movie in the flesh. You are also very homely, you want to have a family and you love and adore kids.  You are a born caregiver, you wrap the people you love in a warm blanket and hand them hot tea. It is not a burden and you love it, you love the feeling, the proud fuzzing feeling in your heart after you had just helped someone. You are usually the friendliest but once you have been angered, it becomes next to impossible to win you back. You are a great friend to have. Anyone who you love is blessed. I can tell you so because my bestie is a number 6 hehe <3

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

♱ ༘⋆𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 7

★  Oh goodness…yes well number 7, ruled by Ketu, the lower part of Rahuketu. Another shadow planet but is sometimes, though wrongly associated with Neptune You are physically very apt, you have a good body and you’re great at sports. You see what no one else does but sometimes you do get lost in your little own abyss of thoughts. You also have a very romantic notion of love, something only seen in movies and books. You tend to do stuff without thinking twice. You are though, very spiritual and people feel a sense of calm washing over them after talking to you. You can be VERY mean when you want to (experienced it first hand, hence the omg in the beginning) though most of the time you’re a lil cutie, clueless and enjoying life like a party with the best booze and songs.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

∞ 🪐.࿔*:･ 𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 8

★ Number 8, ruled by Saturn, covered in rings of eternal karma and longing…Being number 8, you are infinite, in every sense, your love is infinite but so is your yearning and pain. You have to work thrice as hard as everyone else to climb the same mountain. You are bound by the clutches of karma, to elaborate, if you wrong someone, it will come back instantly and with a 100 x force, hitting you square in the jaw, so beware about that. The perks though, of karma being your forever roommate is that no one can be a bitch to you and get away with it. Also, you will reach success and a load amount of it but later in comparison to others around you. You are calming and fun to talk to, you are spiritual with a penchant for exploring the unknown. My advice? enjoy life and lessen the mulling over every little aspect of it.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. 　　　.   　　˚　　 　　*　　 　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　

⚚ ⋆˙⟡𝓝𝓾𝓶𝓫𝓮𝓻 9

★ Number 9, ruled by Mars, problems, sorrow, yearning, beauty, and sweetness all mixed in a bittersweet pie…You have had a tough childhood, haven’t you? Yet you come out of all of it, the sweetest, the kindest, and with a gold-polished heart. You exude a tough exterior because you do not want to be hurt again but in the depths of your hearts you would NEVER wish bad on anyone. You’re just amazing like that. You make everyone feel at home but somehow always feel away from home. You are emotional and sensitive, even a tiny jab creeps into your heart, building a home for a train of thoughts that goes nowhere. But, despite it all, your soul is pure, your hardships do not define you, you are a being of love and greatness, you are spiritual and made for bigger things in the world. You are meant to touch the clouds and fly high above everyone else because you know it all…you have seen it all…

[p0orbaby]

magic 8 ball

summary: What starts as Leah crashing your pity pint spirals, predictably, into something far less wholesome and far more hands-on.

warnings: SMUT 18+, just general sex stuff so you know the drill

a/n: i was inspired, not sure by what, but here we are

word count: 2.5k

-

“I’m not having a breakdown,” you say, peeling the label off your beer with such deep concentration you forget you have to breathe to survive. “I’m having a perfectly rational response to the current state of the world. And also to my boss, who thinks ‘relevance’ is when a TikTok account reposts our gallery’s Instagram.”

Leah makes a sound, something between a laugh and a sigh, and slides onto the stool next to you as if she owns the place. She probably does. Or knows someone who does. She’s wearing a camel coat from The Row that looks like it’s never seen a hanger. Soft, fluid, draped like wealth. Her hair is up—one of those deliberately lazy ponytails that costs £80 at a salon and makes people call you effortless like it’s a compliment. She probably just didn’t bother sorting it after training.

She orders a double gin and tonic. Not with Bombay or Tanqueray or any of the pedestrian options available to people who wear polyester and say OOTD. She points, without looking, at a bottle of something artisanal. Something with botanicals. Something brewed by a man with a beard who lives in Hackney and forages moss recreationally while naked.

“You’re twitching,” she says, when the bartender walks away.

“I’m fine,” you reply, tight. “I’m absolutely fucking fine.”

You’re not. You’re vibrating with the same energy as a microwave that’s just been asked to reheat a bowl of leftover soggy chicken chow mein.

Leah squints. “Your eye does this thing when you’re on the brink of homicide. It’s cute, all things considered.”

You think about stabbing her with the cocktail stick that came with the complimentary olives you got when you ordered. Instead, you finish peeling the label. The bar is now covered in neat, sticky curls of Beck’s branding. You take a vicious sort of pride in it—like this bar owes you something and you’re slowly destroying it molecule by molecule.

“I had to explain post-conceptualism to a man who unironically collects Funko Pops today.”

“God.”

“He said, ‘So it’s like Banksy but sadder?’”

“Oh, sweet Jesus.”

“And then he asked me if Damien Hirst invented fruit winders.”

Leah bites her lip to suppress a grin. You hate that she finds this funny.

“I’m in hell,” you say. “I live here now. It’s beige and the lighting’s fluorescent and all the curators wear Balenciaga in the wrong way.”

“There’s a wrong way to wear Balenciaga?”

“Yes. It’s when you do it with sincerity.”

Leah hums, amused. Her drink arrives. She picks it up like she’s in an advert for skincare. You hate her glass. It’s too clean. You hate how she sips, like the liquid is trying to earn her respect. You hate her in general, really. But it’s a specific, curated hate. The kind that comes with longing. Jealousy. Proximity.

“You’re not angry,” she says, “you’re heartbroken.”

“I am not heartbroken.”

“Fine,” she shrugs. “You’re artistically blue-balled.”

That, unfortunately, lands. You clench your jaw. You spent two months assembling an exhibit that got described as visually competent by someone whose own work consists of melting Barbie heads onto coat hooks. The only person who seemed to get it was a caretaker, and even he asked if it was “about feminism or something.”

Leah’s watching you with the sort of curiosity she usually reserves for rare mushrooms or political scandals. You feel exposed, like she’s mentally peeling your skin back to check for rot.

“I just—” You stop. You sip your beer. You stare at its froth like it insulted your mother. “I just want to make something that doesn’t immediately get filtered through someone else’s idiot-brand algorithm of what art is supposed to do. I don’t want it to do anything. I want it to exist. And I want that to be enough.”

There’s a pause. A proper silence. A respectful one.

Then Leah says, “Well. That’s depressing.”

You blink. “Do you ever have a normal human reaction?”

“I do,” she says, “just not to tantrums disguised as philosophies.”

You groan. Loudly. Obnoxiously. “Why are you here?”

She takes another sip, smacks her lips, says: “You texted me the words ‘I hope my body gets mistaken for a performance piece when I die.’ So I cleared my schedule.”

You rub your face. You did text that. You thought it was funny.

“You’re a masochist,” you mutter.

“You’re dramatic.”

You look up at her, eyes narrowed. “You think you’re better than me.”

Leah leans in, her face maddeningly calm. “Sweetheart. I know I am.”

You want to throw something at her. A pint glass. the chair you’re sitting on. Your entire unresolved emotional history. But instead you say, “Do you ever get tired of always being the most emotionally detached person in the room?”

She tilts her head. “Do you ever get tired of pretending your anger is intellectual when really you’re just sad and lonely and catastrophically underfucked?”

You nearly choke on your drink.

“I am not underfucked.”

“I can see how tense your jaw is from here. It’s clenched like a Victorian child repressing her feelings about having to crawl up another chimney. Go home and look at yourself in the mirror. Tell me that’s the face of someone getting railed regularly.”

You want to die. You also want her to say it again, slowly, in private, with less clothing.

There’s a long, crackling pause. You both know it’s no longer about art.

Leah sets down her glass. She taps the rim once, twice. Rhythm. Precision. Her nails are short, square, coated in clear polish that you don’t normally notice but have now because you can’t look her in the eye. Then you catch yourself staring at her hands for too long and quickly look away.

She doesn’t comment. But you know she notices. Leah notices everything. She notices the hair tie on your wrist has snapped and been retied in a knot, twice. She notices you’ve stopped wearing mascara, which you used to call your “armour” in that stupid, performative way you used to talk about beauty like it was actually important. She notices the crack in your lip that won’t heal because you’ve been biting it every time you think too hard.

She says, eventually, almost to herself:

“Right. That’s enough tragic brooding. Come on.”

You glance at her sideways. “Come on what?”

She lifts her chin, shrugs like it’s obvious. “It’s time for the three F’s.”

You blink. “The what?”

“The three F’s,” she repeats, counting them off on one hand like she’s listing dinner party ingredients. “Food. Fucking. And… I haven’t decided on the third one. It’s usually ‘forgiveness’ but tonight it might change depending on my mood or how close you are to bursting into tears.”

You narrow your eyes. “Are you having a stroke?”

Leah ignores this. She taps her temple. “It’s a system. A trifecta. A deeply spiritual practice.”

“Sounds like a religious cult run by Gordon Ramsay.”

She smirks. “Exactly. Chips first. Sex second. Existential clarity optional.”

You stare at her, arms folded. She’s smiling now, that crooked, smug half-smile that suggests she knows she’s funny, even when you want to shove her face into a vat of chip grease.

“You offering?” you ask, dry. “For the second F?”

Leah shrugs again. “No. I saw a homeless man outside and thought you two might hit it off.”

You snort, despite yourself. “You’re a bitch.”

She sips her drink like she’s just said something unremarkable and bureaucratic, like we’ll be closing early due to maintenance. She doesn’t look at you. You’re glad. You’re not ready for the look she gives you when she’s being sincere. It’s like being x-rayed.

Then she adds, almost as an afterthought, “Of course I’m offering. Don’t be daft.”

You freeze. A beat. Another.

“I thought I was a neurotic, emotionally volatile husk of a woman with a martyr complex and an inflated sense of artistic purpose.”

“You are,” she says. “But you’ve got a decent face and you’re good with your hands. So, you know. Swings and roundabouts.”

You scoff. And you’re trying really hard to stay calm because your doctor has informed you your concerningly high blood pressure is a direct correlation of your erratic emotions.

“What happened to chips first?”

“Oh, I still want chips. I’m starving. I haven’t eaten since three and I’m craving something fried and disgusting. Preferably served by someone with a name badge and an attitude problem.”

You nod slowly. “That’s the most grounded thing you’ve said all night.”

“Thank you. I’m a woman of the people.”

She drains her gin and stands, smooth and sudden, like movement happens to her rather than from her. You watch the line of her coat shift across her hips and hate her a little more. In a nice way. A respectful way.

She glances back at you, already heading toward the door. “You coming, or are you going to sit here frowning into warm beer like the ghost of failed gallery interns past?”

You mutter something under your breath and follow. Of course you do. It’s Leah.

It’s always Leah.

-

“You’re making that face again.”

Leah’s looking at you from the other end of the bed—half undressed, half mocking, propped up on her elbow like some god-awful, lesbianised version of a Greek statue who knows exactly how fit she is.

You’re topless and regretting all your life choices. “What face?”

“The one that says, ‘this is a terrible idea but I’m already wet so fuck it.’”

She’s not wrong.

You shoot her a glare and yank your bra off in one not so smooth move. It slaps the floor with the exhausted whimper of cotton that’s held too many disappointing breasts over the years.

“God, you’re hot when you’re angry,” she says, and you want to laugh. Or hit her. Or sit on her face. All three feel valid.

“Shut up and lie down.”

She does. Immediately. The smugness fades slightly, replaced by something quieter. More concentrated. She watches you crawl over her like a lion stalking its prey. Or more realistically like you’re some slow-motion car crash she wants to get hit by.

You kiss her. Sloppy. Unapologetic. More tongue than technique. It’s not romantic. It’s hot. It’s urgent. It tastes like gin and old rage.

Somewhere between biting her lip and grinding down against her thigh, you lose track of how long you’ve been pretending not to want this. Leah’s skin is warm and annoyingly soft. Her bra’s still on. She’s still wearing her bra.

You reach for it, fumbling. “Why are these always like a NASA launch?”

She laughs into your neck. “You’ve never undressed another woman before, have you?”

“Only emotionally.”

You finally get the clasp and she shrugs out of it, tits bouncing slightly. You both pretend not to notice how your brain flatlines for a second. You’re supposed to be cool. You’re supposed to be in control.

But her nipples are hard and you’re throbbing and when she reaches between your legs without warning, you gasp—loud and unedited.

“Oh my god,” you breathe. “Warn a girl.”

“You’ve literally been grinding on my thigh for five minutes.”

“That’s different. That’s friendship.”

Leah slips her hand down your knickers. Finds you soaked. She hums like she’s impressed. Or smug. Probably both.

“Jesus, babe,” she says. “You’re soaked.”

You scoff. “Don’t call me babe. You sound like some weirdo on Love Island.”

“Fine. Darling?”

“Worse.”

“You’re tight when you’re annoyed,” she murmurs, and then pushes two fingers in. Just like that.

You moan. Too loudly. Your hips buck automatically.

“Oh, fuck—”

Leah grins like a wolf. She curls her fingers and your whole spine tries to fold in half.

“Yeah, that’s it,” she says, pumping slow, deliberate, unfair. “There. Right there. Don’t move.”

You immediately move. “Fuck, wait—fuck, there.”

She groans, her forehead pressed to yours. “You’re so annoying.”

You kiss her to shut her up and reach down between her legs. Her knickers are drenched too. You laugh.

“What?” she says, breath hitching.

“Nothing. Just didn’t know England’s golden girl got this wet.”

“I’m a footballer,” she pants, “not a cardinal.”

You pull her knickers aside, push two fingers in easily. She’s hot and slick and all kinds of fuckable. Her eyes roll back for a second. She grabs your arm, anchoring herself. Her nails dig in.

“Oh my god. Keep doing that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Don’t—don’t fucking stop.”

You thrust harder, matching her rhythm, both your hands moving now—sloppy and synchronised. Her hips are rolling. Yours too. There’s swearing. Lots of it. You’re both flushed and swearing and laughing in between grunts.

“Fuck,” she gasps. “Harder.”

You give it to her harder. You give it to her like a promise. Like revenge.

At one point you both reach for each other at the same time and bang foreheads. Loudly.

“Ow,” you groan, blinking.

She’s laughing. “This is the least elegant sex I’ve ever had.”

“Good,” you growl, sucking a bruise into her neck. “I’m not here to be elegant.”

You push her legs wider. You go lower.

“Wait—are you—oh fuck—”

You don’t bother answering. You just get your mouth on her. One long, filthy lick from her entrance to her clit and she arches like she’s being electrocuted.

“Jesus CHRIST,” she chokes. “You’ve done this before.”

You don’t dignify that with a response. You just moan into her cunt and keep going.

Her hand finds your hair and tugs. Not hard. Just enough to make you feel owned.

She’s close. You can feel it. She starts talking like a woman possessed.

“Yes. There. Don’t stop. Don’t stop, don’t you fucking stop—”

You don’t. Of course you don’t. You flatten your tongue and she breaks.

She cums hard, loud, practically shaking, her thighs closing around your head like a vice.

When she collapses, she pulls you up, kisses you like she’ll die if she doesn’t, and flips you over. She doesn’t even hesitate. Her mouth is on you like it’s home. She licks you open, groaning like you’re her favourite meal and she’s been fasting.

“Oh fuck me,” you cry, gripping the headboard like it’s a lifeline.

She hums against your clit. You nearly black out.

“Yeah?” she says, lifting her head. “That good?”

You nod, dazed.

“Use your words.”

“More.”

“More what?”

“More Leah.”

She moans like that’s the final straw and fingers you hard, mouth locked around your clit as if it belongs there. You cum embarrassingly fast. Practically scream. Collapse against the pillow like a dramatic Victorian wife.

There’s a beat. Silence. Both panting.

Then:

“I think I saw god.”

Leah wipes her mouth and shrugs. “Tell her I said hi.”

You both dissolve into hysterical laughter, tangled up and sweaty and slightly horrified.

“So,” you say, catching your breath. “The verdict on the third F?”

She grins. “I think I'll stick with forgiveness. For all the shit we’re about to pretend didn’t just happen.”

You nod. “Fair.”

And then you kiss her again. Because honestly, what else are you going to do?

[bvrnesher]

❝ The art of flirtation ! ❞ ― leo valdez !

tap here for chb masterlist ! here for reqs info

a/n: this was a req, but i accidentally deleted it TT. ! This is short as fuck, but I tried 🫂

— ✦ pairing: leo valdez ! reader.

LEO VALDEZ DID NOT invite you into his workshop.

Let’s make that clear.

You showed up. With your sketchbook, your paints, and that annoyingly pretty sunshine-aura thing you had going on—like some golden art nymph from a Renaissance painting decided to cosplay as a demigod and crash a garage.

You just waltzed right in, right past the “No Touchy” sign, the hazardous contraptions, and the suspicious trail of smoke leading to the corner where Leo’s latest death-trap invention was probably preparing to self-destruct.

And then, without asking, you sat down.

Right on his favorite workbench.

The one with burn marks, mechanical limbs, and a mysterious stain he’d never admit was salsa.

“Hey, Leo,” you said, like you owned the place. Like this wasn’t a sanctuary of gears, grime, and chaos but your own personal studio.

And just like that, he was done for.

You weren’t supposed to stay long. You’d said something about “inspiration” and “sunlight and steel” and how his workshop “had good vibes,” which sounded fake—but also suspiciously like a compliment.

So Leo just blinked at you, watched you pull out a battered paint palette and start sketching, and then spun on his heel and marched back into the clutter muttering something about “boundaries” and “how hot people always get away with stuff.”

That was, like, an hour ago.

And Leo liked chaos.

Not the dangerous, world-ending kind—he’d had enough of that to last a lifetime—but the fun kind. The kind that made your hair smell like smoke and your hands stained with oil and laughter. The kind that made sparks fly from metal and from the stupid little grin he always gave you.

Now? You were still there. Legs crossed on his bench, covered in smudges of gold paint and soft humming, your brush swishing across a canvas that rested against a toolbox labeled “DO NOT OPEN (seriously this will explode).”

You were a walking contradiction: warmth in a place built on fire, elegance in a place built from metal, and chaos in a form Leo somehow didn’t want to throw out the door.

So, naturally, he had to bother you.

For balance.

You sat on the workbench, surrounded by scattered sketches, sunbeams, and the faint scent of oranges. Your fingers danced across the canvas like they had a secret to tell. You looked out of place in the middle of scrap parts and smoke—but somehow, you belonged more than the blueprints ever did.

Leo peeked around the wall, a smudge of grease on his cheek and a screwdriver still behind his ear. He tried not to smile. Failed.

“Hey, sunshine,” he called, leaning on the doorway like he was auditioning for the role of "most annoying boyfriend alive." “Don’t mind me, just checking if the goddess of light came to bless my extremely important tinkering with her divine presence.”

“You mean I came to save your mess of a workspace with actual taste?” you said calmly, flicking your paintbrush with a flourish. “I should charge for the aesthetic upgrade.”

Leo gasped, staggering back like you’d stabbed him. “You wound me, art girl. You really do.”

You didn’t flinch.

“You know,” Leo continued, peering dramatically over your shoulder, “this whole art-in-my-space thing… very bold move. Should I be worried? Is this how invasions start?”

“You’ll survive,” you said, not looking up from your painting.

“Debatable,” he muttered. “You’re sitting directly on my wrench stash. That’s a war crime.”

You tilted your head, dipped your brush into a bright streak of orange, and replied calmly, “I’ll move if you say something that doesn’t sound like a bad pick-up line.”

Leo gasped. Clutched his chest like he’d been shot. “You insult me. That was a great pick-up line. It had flair.”

“It had grease stains and poor delivery.”

“Oof.” He collapsed against the bench, sighing dramatically. “You wound me, Apollo girl. First, you break into my temple of fire and invention, then you destroy my ego.”

You just kept painting. Which, frankly, made it worse.

“What are you even painting, anyway?” he asked, craning his neck to get a peek.

“The way sunlight moves across metal,” you answered simply.

Leo blinked. “You mean like… a shiny toaster?”

You smacked him with your paintbrush. Gently. He grinned anyway.

“Okay, okay,” he said, hands raised in surrender. “No toaster metaphors. Got it.”

There was a pause. A soft one. Your brush slowed, catching the light. Leo found himself staring—not at the painting, but at you. Your calm, your focus, the tiny smile you tried to hide whenever he teased you too much.

His heart did a little thing. Probably a short circuit. Or something poetic. Gross.

He looked away.

“You know,” he said eventually, “you don’t have to come in here just to steal my lighting.”

“Oh?” you replied, not missing a beat. “Then why do you keep turning the ceiling mirrors to catch the sun where I sit?”

Leo paused.

Then groaned.

“Ugh. Busted.”

You smirked.

Later—much later—he found himself sitting beside you, both of you on the floor, surrounded by paint-splattered rags, half-disassembled gadgets, and the soft buzz of quiet companionship.

Your painting leaned against the wall, golden and warm. His half-finished invention sparked beside it, humming softly like it didn’t mind sharing the space.

“You know,” Leo said quietly, “I always thought this place was too chaotic for someone like you.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Someone like me?”

“Y’know. All light and soft colors and poetic metaphors about sunshine.”

You nudged his leg with your foot. “You’re all sparks and fire and grease stains. Guess we’re both chaotic in our own way.”

Leo smiled, small and real. “Yeah. But you’re the pretty kind of chaos.”

You looked at him for a moment—really looked—and then leaned your head against his shoulder.

“And you’re the kind that makes a mess and calls it a masterpiece.”

“Rude,” Leo muttered. “True. But rude.”

And for the first time in a long time, the workshop felt complete.

Not perfect.

Just… warm.

— 💐 Req: Heyyyy could you maybe write Leo and an Apollo reader, with him tinkering and her doing art in his workshop? Then maybe he comes to bother her with bad jokes and teasing?

[j-jared]

Danny judges the Family Business

Danny: How many kids do you have? How many vigilantes are in Gotham right now?

Batman: ... you know how many.

Danny: Seriously, your grandson too? Couldn't stick to just yourself?

Flash: Can we not?

Danny: ... I mean I sorta understand the clone thing makes it murky water, but COME ON!

Superman: *sweating*

And finally, finally, they have enough of the lectures. They know Danny's identity, they know of his parents, his sister. So they ask.

Batman: Would you not tell your parents if you needed help.

Danny: I chose not to tell my parents! My dad has his own section on the news if he's out driving, I don't want them on my team!

JL: .. What?

Danny: I mean, yeah, they'd be helpful on the government research side of things, but... You guys obviously looked into this, they can't aim for shit most of the time! They cause more property damage than any of the ghosts do in the longterm. My dad would probably shout out my name each time he saw me on patrol. Besides, they've calmed down the whoke vivisection thing, they're more like... safari people now. If the ghosts aren't actively attacking, they watch and make notes to study behavior.

Wonderwoman: And your sister? She helped you did she not?

Danny: Yeah, when I was 14 and freshly dead? Believe me, the moment she had an out we both took it. She's studying out in California now, and she's only stepping in for emergencies. Like, end of the dimension emergencies, not 'Oh I've been stabbed again' emergencies.

-----

I find the idea that Danny lectures the JL about the younger heroes and like, making sure they aren't prioritizing hero work out of duty really funny. This undead boy took up his own duty when the only other option was his parents and their inventions (one of which actually killed him by opening a door to another dimension) and felt obliged to deal with the ghosts for both the living and the dead's sakes. He opened the portal, he'll clean up the mess while keeping everyone safe. Sam and Tucker got to help, but once he got control of his powers (maybe once he gets the crown and authority in a Ghost King setting), he's offered them outs as well. They take them slightly. They step in for the heavy hitters, but generally Phantom flies solo; besides JL business. Maybe Dani joins in, but she's her own free spirit so it's not like she sticks around long.

Danny wants to know that all these younger heroes are there because they wanna be, not sacrificing a normal life because of feeling pressured or needing to live up to the expectations of their guardians/mentors.

And I know the JL care about these kids, Danny just ain't sure (He can glance at the BatClan and just smell the death and drama) - and he wants to be. These kids better have a healthy work-life balance, so help him Ancients.

[bluecookies02]

Viktor x Wife!Reader

Marriage headcanons that nobody asked for. Fluff, Hurt/Comfort.

word count : 0.5k

cw: none

Being his wife is a chore and a half.

The limited time spent together, the stress of his job, the snappy attitude he gets when he's being swarmed with deadlines, inventions, investors, the council....

But then he's waking you up early every morning, just so he could spend those sweet 30 minutes before he has to leave for work, having tea or coffee with you until the very last moment. Then he's texting you during every 5 minute break he takes, and if the occasion allows, he calls.

At night he's tiptoeing into bed as to not wake you(you hear his cane from the hallway), laying perfectly still until he can't help but put an arm over you, or touch your legs together. It's endearing to watch him hold his breath as you pretend you've fallen asleep.

If he notices that his research kept him away too much that month, he will start inviting you to his lab. He won't have a lot of time to give you his full attention, but he will scrap up those sneaky little moments until they add up to something significant. He lives hoping that it's enough, and he's always battling with himself, knowing that you deserve more.

He is giving you everything he possibly can. You know this. His time off is scarce and pitiful, yet it's almost exclusively spent with you. Time holds more weight, when it's coming from him, rather then it would if you were with anyone else.

Despite what many people think, he comes to not reject PDA. All within social norms of-course. He holds your hand and he lets you kiss him without much complaint(he secretly likes it bc it boosts his ego a lil). It took him getting that comfortable over the years but it's wonderful.

He isn't an initiator. That can make you feel moody and neglected at occasions. He also can't say a mouthful of loving words to you, it's impossible for him, like there's some sort of a lump in his throat that will never let him.

He will reply to your "I love you's" but he will rarely be the first to say it. He more often says things that look like love confessions if you squint. He makes up for it by being touchy. Puts your legs on his lap when you're resting together, pets your waist or your stomach while you're sprawled out on the couch, softly squeezes your shoulder...etc etc

The worst part of your relationship comes when he fully shuts down emotionally. You had to learn to navigate these sudden switch ups. They used to upset you a lot, they still can if you're being honest. If you do or say the wrong thing, he will say so many ugly things that stab right into your heart, with intention to hurt you and make you hate him, because under that anger is guilt of 'wasting your time' and feelings of complete inadequacy to keep you happy.

He does his job with an insane amount of passion, and that's one of the main reasons why setbacks or pulled fundings easily get him in this state.

You used to have screaming matches, dramatic throwing of your rings to the floor, slamming doors and leaving the apartment...All excepted considering you married quite young.

Now, to save you both the emotional toll it left on you, he tries to shut into his lab for a bit to calm down and you try not to nurture his self sabotage if it comes to it. It isn't the healthiest but it does work.

You recognize when he starts getting intentionally mean and you completely ruin his plans by leaving the room and telling him to get his shit together and come to bed once he's equipped to act like a proper husband you know he is. These become more rare the longer you're together aswell, because the security into your relationship grows exponentially with time (they come back full force once his disease progresses...please don't let him push you away🥹)

idek where i was going with this, i just want this man as my husband.

These are like, delulu headcanons, i have plenty different ones for when I am not feeling biased. For one, this dude ain't marrying anyone, at least not legally.

[writergeekrhw]

hey robert! i hope you are well.

i was just wondering if there are any fun facts/insights you could give on the development of weyoun? i've he wasn't originally supposed to come back after dying the first time, but people liked him so much they invented the vorta cloning backstory just for more weyoun - were there other ideas thrown around as to how he could make a comeback that weren't ever used?

The way I remember it, I proposed the clone thing as my very first stab at how to bring Weyoun back. At the time, I joked that the next Weyoun would be Weydos, then Weytres, etc. Ira went for it right away, so there wasn't a lot of throwing ideas around.

Every once in a while, you hit the first pitch out of the park.

[strawberrykidneystone]

lend an arm

summary: you’re a mechanic who sevika refused to work with until one day she comes back with her arm ripped off

a/n: idk if the title makes sense but it’s a play on lend a hand but yk,,, she lost her whole arm😋

tags: fluff, banter, mention of hooking up, less spicy than i thought it was gonna be whoops, smoking

ty anon for the request!!!

ao3 version

when you were hired as silco’s handyman, you imagined you would be working with sevika a lot to add upgrades to her arm, fix her arm after combat, etc. etc.

nope.

quite the opposite. you were met with the cold shoulder every time, a gruff out ‘i can do it myself’ before she stomps off to the corner of silco’s office to tinker with her arm. you’re sure there’s a masturbation joke there somewhere, but you haven’t quite thought of a clever enough one to say aloud.

did you hook up with her a few times? yes. was it your proudest moment? no, but damn was it good.

given that, most of your time was spent with jinx, albeit sometimes more than you’d like. you love the girl to bits, but sometimes she can be a bit… much. still, you liked her music taste and you got on well enough, not to mention her inventions were quite clever, not that you’d ever say it to her; she's already got quite the ego.

still, the blue haired girl was still family or whatever you’d call it. you knew she was still sneaking into her lab and pretended to be none the wiser, but you’re pretty sure that she knew you knew.

although sevika refused your help, you couldn’t help but notice how she’d glance up every time she tweaked something on her arm, as if she were searching for approval from you. you’d make eye contact with her and glance down at what she’d fixed, giving an approving nod or shaking your head depending on what she did. each time you nodded, you’d swear you saw a blush creep up her ears. if you shook your head though, she’d scowl and vigorously undo her work and redo it until either she was satisfied with it or look to get your approval again. it was a cute little game you two would play, but you knew you’d be able to make the fixes about 10x faster if she would only let you.

and the silco died.

with nowhere else to go and determined not going to join any side in the turf war for the lanes, that left you the last drop where you’d been sleeping on the couch in his old office. damn, you still couldn’t believe that he was gone. sure he was an asshole most of the time, but he was one of the people and at least tried to keep give shithole of the undercity some sort of organization.

whatever, at least his couch was comfy.

you were tinkering with one of jinx’s old chompers in silco’s office when sevika came barreling in. you jumped a bit from the slam of the door and looked at the panting figure in the doorway. she had her poncho covering the front of her body, but the lumpiness under the cloth alarmed you that something was wrong. she wordlessly walked past you and threw her poncho off to the side, revealing her flesh arm holding her mechanical arm under her armpit. the gears sticking out of the stump of her mechanical arm told you that someone had ripped it out, and she was pissed.

she slammed her arm on the table and grumbled to herself, grabbing a flathead screwdriver from the table of her former boss’ desk. she stabbed the head in and cursed under her breath, muttering something about a ‘pink haired brat’ as she attempted to fix her mechanical limb. she spent a good 10 minutes trying to fix the arm with her one good hand. you minded your business and kept your eyes on your book, studying about the latest technology in the upper city, hextech.

until you heard it. she sighed and turned around, leaning her back against the table, saying something quietly in your direction. you lifted your head and tilted it questioningly to the side, “what was that?”

sevika huffed and dragged her hand down her face, “can you fix my arm?”

a small grin crept up your lips, oh you were gonna have fun with this, “what’s the magic word?”

sevika deadpanned at you and rolled her eyes, but was too tired to argue, “…please.”

you clapped your hands together and happily stood up, “yes! i’ve been waiting for this!”

you basically pushed her aside as you quickly got to work on her arm, trying to undo as much damage as you could. after about an hour, you were able to restore basic function in the arm, but one good punch could make the whole thing fall apart all over again. you straightened up and looked around the room to see where she had gone, you really fell into your own world as you worked. looking around, you saw her on the couch fixated down, the same area where your ass had been only moments before. you cleared your throat which seemed to snap her out of her trance, her head snapping up to meet your eyes.

you held her arm up and gestured for her to come over. she scrambled up to meet you at your side, holding her arm out expectantly. brushing past her, you attached her arm back on with a satisfying ‘click’ at it latched into place. you took a step back to let her adjust to it again. she clenched her hand into a fist and turned her hand over, admiring your handiwork. she hummed in approval and looked down at you with a glint of respect in her eyes that you’d never seen before.

“that should do for now, but you’ll probably need a new arm if you don’t want to get your ass beat,” you smirked as you dusted off your hands off on your pants.

“thought that you fixed it?,” she said with a raised eyebrow. her tone was meant not in an attacking manner, but more curiosity on the actual damage of her arm.

“i’m a mechanic, not a miracle worker,” you chided, crossing your arms over your chest.

sevika raised her arms in relinquishment, a half smirk gracing her lips, “easy princess, ‘meant no offense to your skills.”

“uh huh,” you responded sarcastically, rolling your eyes as you patted her shoulder.

she sighed and looked down, glancing back up at you in reluctance, “what i meant was… thank you.”

you raised your eyebrows in surprise, but smiled at the sentiment, “you’re welcome, i just wish i could’ve helped more earlier.”

“earlier?” she asked in a neutral tone, taking a cigarette out of her pocket and putting it in the corner of her mouth, lighting it with one hand while she cupped around her mouth with the other. she took a quick drag and blew the smoke away from you, letting the cigarette rest lazily between her fingers.

“y’know, before silco died. if you had let me work on your arm and upgrade it, it probably wouldn’t have broken in the first place,” you said matter-of-factly, plucking the cigarette from her fingers and taking a puff, purposefully blowing it towards her.

“my arm was fine, it was just this one time,” she responded gruffly, taking another drag from the cigarette. you shrugged and glanced over her arm, subconsciously making sure that every part was working as it should.

“…where the hell should i get a new arm?” she asked as nonchalantly as she could, but a little more waiver of worry still came through in her voice.

you looked up at her and grinned, pointing up, “the answer is closer than you think.”

she looked up and jumped a little seeing the blue haired girl, “jesus jinx.”

nothing made sevika jump, she must’ve really been on edge with silco’s death.

jinx giggled and shook her head, “fine, but i want complete creative control.”

sevika sighed defeatedly and looked at you for any sort of help, which of course you gave none.

“fine.”

[sweaterkittensahoy]

There's a moment in Hotel Rwanda where Nick Nolte, playing UN Colonel Oliver, says to Don Cheadle as Paul Rusesabagina, "You're black. You're not even a ni**er. You're African," to explain to Paul why the wider world doesn't give a shit about the Rwandan genocide. It is partially a rebuke against the UN itself.

And it's something that's rung in my head over and over as I've seen the rise in antisemitism and loudly called it out as often as I can. And all I can hear is Nick Nolte's voice in my head saying, "You're not even people. You're Jews. You're not even Jews. You're Israelis."

And truly, that's what it feels like as over and over and over again Jews are blamed for existing and Israelis, in particular, are blamed for existing and refusing to lie down and die to make happy some of the worst propaganda-eating fuckshits to ever loudly open their mouths and say they're for human rights and dignity and then repeat blood libel and Hamas talking points.

I've been trying to find a way to say this with some sort of eloquence for awhile, but it's really as simple as I've made it here. Jews are being punished over and over and over again for existing, and people who think they're on the right side of things (including the UN and the Red Cross and many other groups who claim to be about humanitarian efforts) show their disregard and dismissal of Jews being human on a daily basis and get a pass from other people who claim to care about their fellow humans. But really, it's only their fellow humans who line up with them on an ever changing moral scale that adjusts so the ones hating Jews can pretend it's not antisemitism but some new thing they just invented that is totally not antisemitism.

To every Jew who sees this: I'm just a loud goy with a fuck you streak, and I hope it helps to know I see the struggle and abuses and outright blood libel shit and will not be quiet about how you are being dehumanized and shit on by people who talked a big talk of having your back and then immediately stabbed you in it when the chance to parrot a terrorist organization was just too tempting.

[maliro-t]

The highlight of Veilguard for me is the relationship between Solas and Rook- and I don't know how to write about this on the internet without being acutely aware of other peoples' criticisms (such as there not being enough of it)- so I'll just say up top that I'm not actually intending this as a refutation of any of those. I just want to talk about my experience with the game and why I like it so much, which will probably make obvious where I disagree with some reoccurring critiques I've seen. *

The thing about Solas in this game is that he plays the role of the trickster perfectly. As much as Fen'Harel is a myth or a persona, and the stories we know of him invented or twisted, his role in Veilguard feels like it could slot in so, so easily with the myths, and in many ways directly parallels them. He is sinister and noble, monstrous and sympathetic, ruthless and compassionate, all at once. He spends the game trapped and humbled but can be almost gleefully condescending at times. He conflates outsmarting an enemy with being right, even as he plays the long-suffering martyr, tortured by countless mistakes. He falls easily into the role of advisor but is quick to note your foolishness. To sneer and declare the problem yours and yet still impose upon you an appraisal of your conduct.

But more than any of that, for most of the game, he's...passive. Dormant. He seems to make no moves, other than as a glorified consultant, despite starting as the main threat.

In Blood of Arlathan, when he finally rears his head again as major a player on the board, it's with a gallant offer of help. As an ally. He is exactly what you need, right when you need it, and you don't even have to ask him to be. And- because you don't have constant access to him, you maybe haven't even considered him an option!

He feels extremely intentionally sparing to me before this in service of a) making you think you're the one with power over him and b) causing you to forget he might contribute at all, so that when he finally does, it seems wholly benevolent. It comes in a moment where your goals are exactly aligned, and indisputably noble.

It's a waiting game. A classic of his, harkening back to stories we've heard time and again about Fen'harel and traps.

As Felassan tells it in the Masked Empire:

Fen'Harel was captured by the hunting goddess, Andruil. He had angered her by hunting the halla without her blessing, and she tied him to a tree and declared that he would have to serve in her bed for a year and a day to pay her back. But as she made camp that night, the dark god Anaris found them, and Anaris swore that he would kill Fen'Harel for crimes against the Forgotten Ones. Andruil and Anaris decided that they would duel for the right to claim Fen'Harel. He called out to Anaris during the fight and told him of a flaw in Andruil's armor just above the hip, and Anaris stabbed Andruil in the side, and she fell. Then Fen'Harel told Anaris that he owed the Dread Wolf for the victory and ought to get his freedom. Anaris was so affronted by Fen'Harel's audacity that he turned and shouted insults at the prisoner, and so he did not see Andruil, injured but alive, rise behind him and attack with her great bow. Anaris fell with a golden arrow in his back, badly injured, and while both gods slumbered to heal their wounds, Fen'Harel chewed through his ropes and escaped.

He goads his enemies into fighting each other for his benefit. Anaris, who had hunted him, succeeds with Fen'Harel's advice, exploiting a weakness he could only see with his aid. In turn, Anaris himself is left exposed. The victory goes to Fen'Harel, who has now dispatched two enemies at once and cleverly won his freedom.

He who was both Creator and Forgotten One. Who could walk amongst both as kin, and who in the end turned his back on them all.

Another tale:

The god Fen'Harel was asked by a village to kill a great beast. He came to the beast at dawn, and saw its strength, and knew it would slay him if he fought it. So instead, he shot an arrow up into the sky. The villagers asked Fen'Harel how he would save them, and he said to them, 'When did I say that I would save you?' And he left, and the great beast came into the village that night and killed the warriors, and the women, and the elders. It came to the children and opened its great maw, but then the arrow that Fen'Harel had loosed fell from the sky into the great beast's mouth, and killed it. The children of the village wept for their parents and elders, but still they made an offering to Fen'Harel of thanks, for he had done what the villagers had asked. He had killed the beast, with his cunning, and a slow arrow that the beast never noticed.

Felassan is everywhere in the Crossroads, in memories, in regrets, in notes that speak to a time you can barely fathom and traces of a friendship that is never once brought up by Solas directly (to my knowledge at least). I think Felassan serves a lot of purposes; he's a window into history, into Solas' mind and ideals, someone who challenges moments of ruthlessness but is loyal, an advisor who keeps Solas grounded even as he pushes him to become something larger than he is, a lingering notion of a loss that you can never really see the full scale of, and so on. And I think, too, that he's written carefully to be a meaningful presence from the rebellion without explicitly spoiling what eventually happens to him, which I wouldn't be surprised if was a legit consideration made for people who might go back and read the Masked Empire after dav lol- in the same way that Trespasser only really spoils the book if you already know what happens.

But for me, every note signed with his name is almost a tongue-in-cheek warning about what's to come. Felassan. A slow arrow, fired apparently mockingly into the sky, only to strike true when it's least expected. A solution executed with neither kindness nor explanation, serving first and foremost the interests of the one who fired it. Felassan's presence in the game ever so slightly encodes a reminder of who you're actually dealing with and what his core tenants are, whether as an ally or an adversary. You only know if you know, but it doesn't seem an accident to me that this reoccurring name of a general who shaped himself in honor of the Dread Wolf's unorthodox cleverness is so key to these traces of Fen'Harel's past, despite, again, never directly being discussed.

Anyways, to Rook. First, I gotta give a shoutout to Bryony Corrigan, whose voice I used for mine- she honestly made the game for me, especially in moments where I felt unsure of it. I love Rook, I love how they're written, and I love how they're performed. While a complete blank slate protagonist can be really fun, I find putting myself as a player in conversation with limitations given by the game really fun and interesting, and often surprising! And I do feel there's still plenty of flexibility.

My perspective on the relationship between Rook and Solas in Veilguard is specific to how I played of course, and I haven't seen other versions of their dynamic at this point to compare so I can't speak to them. But my experience was as such:

I didn't come into the game wanting to intentionally antagonize him. If he rose at me, I rose at him- and those moments of tension were really, really fun. But I tried to accept what he gave me with a fairly open mind. Skepticism, sure, but also the knowledge that ultimately, we both wanted Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain gone, and he knew them better than I did.

It was really gratifying, then, to see our rocky partnership evolve over time into what seemed like a genuine respect. But it didn't really feel straightforward to me either. For example, the conversation before Weisshaupt held a lot of weight for me: listening to him tell that chilling tale about undermining an enemy with persistent laughter and finding that 'Do whatever it takes to remove those who oppose you' was something we came out aligned on was.... There was an element of foreboding to that. Like, I had found myself actively trying to impress him here! And feeling good when it seemed like I had, but uneasy about how I had done it, even when I agreed with what I'd said.

And of course, after that comes Arlathan. Solas' big hero moment. This is the point in the game where our alliance finally felt comfortable to me. The conversation in the fade after was the first time that it really seemed like we were on even ground. And the game- not just Solas- told me here outright that I had earned his respect! After that, I didn't consider betrayal a possibility for a moment. Honestly, I barely even considered him an antagonist at all, because he had become a partner instead! I was expecting something clever down the line, but I wasn't worried about it hurting me. Our disagreements had been set aside, and the goal of his that I had initially opposed had been so thoroughly usurped I had forgotten that he was even pursuing it. And yes, that's perhaps naivety on my part, but I was so distracted by that not at all being the main plot that I forgot that it actually still was. Which is the whole point, right? He waits until your head is turned the other way to strike.

All this to say, my reaction when you kill Ghilan'nain and Solas uses the instability of the Veil to force you into his prison went beyond shock and confusion. It wasn't until well into his villain monologue that I was able to accept that he had betrayed me at all- having been thus far trying desperately to convince myself that the sequence I was seeing was Elgar'nan playing mind games in retaliation, and not actually Solas.

That prison moment is his Slow Arrow. You are Anaris to Elgar'nan's Andruil, the dagger the chink in her armor, and Ghilan'nain's death the golden arrow striking you in the back.

The wolf chews its leg off to escape the trap.

And I should say, I was coming at this all from the meta perspective of someone who loves Solas and empathizes with him and has never seen him as irredeemable or evil- and I, the player, who believed that all game and is ultimately satisfied with the resolution I got- felt hoodwinked as fuck in this moment lmao!!

There's a line in the prison that Varric has about it being easier for Solas to play the villain when he knows he's causing harm- so I do think he plays up his sinisterness here on purpose. But it's such a slap in the face coming straight off of "You have earned the respect of the Dread Wolf." A true and profound betrayal, at least for me.

And it doesn't stop there! His trickster maneuvers and half-truths aren't done until the credits roll. I love that when you meet again, he is nothing but apologies. He makes every concession- that Varric was a good man, that every victory in this fight has been yours, that he needs you and not the other way around, that he was wrong and made mistakes and betrayed people who never deserved it. And of course, we know from experience at this point that this won't stop him from doing it again anyways. But he never holds back from placing the blame on himself. Agreeing with you. Telling you you're right, and that Elgar'nan must be stopped. He only ever says things that are true. Things that are aligned with your point of view.

"[The veil] will never come down by my hand." Well, yes. Because it will fall on its own when Elgar'nan is dead. You won't hardly have to do anything at that point, Solas, will you?

It doesn't matter if Rook isn't falling for it, because if they don't accept his partnership, they lose! That's it! It's the same as it was at the start, but with the added sting of knowing it probably won't work out in your favor this time.

I remember before launch John Epler saying that Solas sees himself in Rook, which really echoes throughout the whole game for me. There are some ways you could say Solas seems opposite to Rook- and of course this can wax and wane depending on roleplaying choices, but the central conceit of Rook as Varric's recruit is that they are a specialist in being willing to act. And on the surface at least, that's kind of counter to Solas' Slow Arrow, right? Blunt force versus delayed gratification. But not entirely! Because every backstory we have for Rook revolves around a kind of heroism that is unorthodox enough to have left you ultimately punished for it. Like yeah, yeah, you saved some lives.... The optics were kinda bad though, so maybe you could go on a sabbatical for a while?

Rook is, from the start, an unconventional and unsung hero, admonished by some for ruffling feathers that they shouldn't have in pursuit of a noble goal. Not unlike Fen'Harel.

I find, too, that there's kind of a nesting doll of parallels around Rook and Solas as foils that the whole story hinges on:

We see Solas, his regrets plastered on every wall, each of them tied to Mythal. At every turn he seems to warn her that this is not the right path, but he follows her down it anyways, until he is left with nothing but an overwhelming need to fix what they have broken.

We see Felassan, who still wears Mythal's vallaslin on his face, challenging Solas' judgement and methods, but still standing by him through the rebellion, after the Veil, for however many thousands of years they slept. Ultimately, in the Masked Empire, the thing that makes him falter is his admiration for someone else's pursuit of freedom. His admiration for Briala.

"I suspect you'll hate this, but she reminds me of-"

Solas is Rook. Solas is Briala. Upstarts, flawed defenders, people who are made into leaders because of their willingness to fight for something. Who see injustice and cannot rest.

Solas is Felassan, the devoted general. One who pushes against his orders but cannot deny them. Someone who loves the cause, but more than that is dedicated to the person who champions it. A voice of reason who, in the end, turns away.

Solas is Mythal, a pragmatic leader, responsible for uncountable deaths. Someone who has relied on partners and power structures that have led her down a dark path, partners whose mistakes in their pursuit of power have become her own. Partners who in the end betray her.

Solas is trapped in his regrets because they are not all his. He struggles with having been failed and with how he has failed others, and in his mind the two become conflated. He carries these contradictory roles on his back- perpetrator and victim, betrayer and betrayed- and cannot see how to overcome them. He is ultimately freed by Mythal's absolution because the foremost factor in his crusade is not belief but guilt.

The ends have to justify the means, because there is no other way he can live with himself. And at every step, he is trying to redeem Mythal as much as he is trying to redeem himself.

He did not want a body, but she asked him to come. He wanted to give wisdom, not orders. I will always follow where you go.

He left a scar when he burned her off his face.

It was all for her. It was always for her.

Solas' duplicity is unending, but so is his devotion. And there is such an earnestness to a Rook, always betrayed, that sees and empathizes with that and uses it to free him.

* I will say that during the game I was definitely wishing you could show your hand to him a little more and press him about his memories prior to the endgame (and separate from this I have quibbles with the impact of some of those memory reveals- like wrt the delivery just not feeling as weighty as I would like. The payoff is absolutely still there in the end, it just felt to me like they were too nonchalantly getting a ton of info out that had to be established moving forward, despite these being like earthshattering reveals that people have Correctly (!!!!) theorized about for up to 15 years). That being said, in retrospect it would have lessened the impact of the finale to have pressed Solas about, for example, his relationship to Mythal prior to absolutely pulling the rug out from under him with it at the 11th hour. And additionally, it's a structural nightmare because you can uncover the memories at almost any point in the story, and you don't have constant access to Solas to chat with him about them. Which you shouldn't imo, in service to the story being told!! But it's also true that early on I found scenes with Solas super gripping, and scenes with my team often...not. And that was initially disheartening, but developed positively over time on all fronts once the game didn't have to worry about setting things up. So, I did wish for more here at first, but I've revised my opinion now that I can see the whole arc.

[weebsinstash]

Omg more Viktor and Jayce pls that was so good

I keep gravitating back towards the scene where they have their first huge disagreement, the whole "I'M from the Undercity" conversation, and I still feel like a disabled Reader who is from the Undercity is one of my favorite routes to go to pair Viktor up with

I keep feeling drawn to scenarios where Reader meets Viktor but not Jayce and you inadvertently, unintentionally, cause a big rift between the two of them because Jayce says or does something fucked up to you that stabs Viktor in the back in the same way as that conversation

Like could you even imagine if Viktor is already forming feelings for you and here's Jayce, talking about how he doesn't trust you, you aren't like the two of them, you're too anxious and twitchy like you're planning something, how Viktor needs to stop letting you hang around. Just envision in your mind Jayce just REALLY REALLY being riled up and saying something like, "I'm tired of having to worry about them stealing something while they're constantly just limping around--" and here's Viktor immediately coming to not just your defense but his own, "'Limping around'?LIMPING AROUND? Is that really what I heard tou say just now?!" like he's absolutely furious, because uh, what the FUCK is that supposed to mean, Jayce?

Jayce getting jealous when Viktor sidelines a project they're working on together because he wants to help you with a brace or he's inventing some sort of mobility aid for you, and Jayce being absolutely convinced you're taking advantage of Viktor and will stab him in the back. Jayce being jealous and feeling replaced when Viktor is constantly spending time with you to troubleshoot the aids he's built for you. Jayce really itching to work on this project but he can't find Viktor anywhere and he's running all over town and he catches you two... having lunch together. He's jealous. He's angry. He's feelin' a lil possessive for sure.

But also like. Reader feeling... insecure when Viktor heals his leg. I was just reading that this man is 5'10??? So you go from seeing him using his cane, kind of slouching at times, to having him stand at his full height before you, completely healed? It has you feeling... small in more ways than one to see that he's just... gotten better while YOU haven't, or maybe never will. Absolutely 100% you're happy for him but... you just wish you weren't dragging him down more than ever before now that you and him... are on even less equal footing than before

But then I also think of how Viktor's journey slowly corrupts him, or distorts his thoughts, and how a yandere obsession could... pile on top of that

He's healed his leg, he's feeling the rush and the high of running and having a fully functional body for the first time in his life. His chronic pain is gone. He keeps his cane but he's no longer REQUIRED to use it. He's high on life itself, like the entire world has opened up to him all over again. There are so many possibilities now. He feels like he can do anything he can put his mind to. And, of course, YOU are one of the first things he can think about. Now he can do so much more to help you! Protect you! Eliminate any dangers to you!

I couldn't decide if Viktor would want to heal the Reader's leg much like his own or if he would just keep you as you are. I mean, like if he could choose, make a distinction between helping that one singular part of yourself versus what he was doing to people like Salo. Maybe, through some sort of means, you were also touched by the Arcane, and you're able to keep your sanity while it heals your fragile body

(Mmm.... yandere Viktor who can remember you across timelines or gets glimpses of other realities... I love me a good timeline/multiverse "I'll keep going through this loop as many times as it takes to save you" oh wait shit you know what just happened, unlocked a new love for Ekko, we're gonna come back for him later)

Reader meeting Old Viktor or meeting him much in the same way young Jayce did because Viktor still loves you across timelines and he wants to keep every possible vestige of you safe, maybe with you even meeting a version of him who only learned the error of his ways after you had died. Old Viktor giving you something for protection from your current Viktor, maybe even giving you the rune or key to keeping your sanity to be safely healed by the arcane. It being Reader's destiny that meet Viktor and you both change each other's lives. But. Also. Old Viktor giving you something that actually helps young Viktor capture you or something though, too 👀 old Viktor needing to keep the loop going and being the first step on your long journey of becoming the apple of his own eye.

The absolute timeline fuckery potential of the catalyst to you meeting Viktor, being fucking Viktor. Old Viktor gives you some trinket and when you meet "your" version for the first time, the trinket is the first thing he notices, or something like, you drop The Thingy and it's while you're chasing that thing as it rolls or bounces or whatever, that's what causes you to collide with Viktor and meet him for the first time

Ngl.... the slightly mentally broken version of Jayce that's all scruffy and lugs that hammer around is kinda the only version of him I find like, HOT hot, and god 🥴 he has, juicier plot potential than the earlier versions of Jayce as well

To just spit it out, Viktor going through his whole Glorious Evolution and having his takeover but, deciding to keep Jayce and yourself as you are. Mentally broken newly born gods can have their beloved humans for forced companions/pets, as a treat. You and Jayce growing closer in your captivity. Jayce with everything he's lost developing new unhealthy attachments to one of the only things he has left: you. Viktor who may or may not be varying levels of indifferent or outright approving if Jayce were to be physically affectionate with you, developing to outright intimacy.

Who knows, maybe Jayce is sent through some Inception-style Homura-level timeline fuckery where he either learns the importance to the timeline and fate of the world that you're kept safe (which he might take to extreme degrees in effort of trying to do good) or he may just be driven mad with grief seeing so many outcomes where you die, and it's through these branching choices and timelines that he develops deeper feelings for you

But also!!! The version of Viktor who is going around healing people who has not gone full evil borderline cyborg yet also had his own dynamic to him! Live with your yandere lover on his peaceful hippie commune while everyone, like, grows crops for the needy and does borderline habitat for humanity level charity stuff but also there's this constant underlying unshakeable feeling everyone is a little off and cold, like physically cold? Like imagine you and Viktor having a touch-heavy love language because he's been your friend and helping you with your leg and a lot of that involved him needing to touch you, but also for you to trust him and lean on him and the other way around, and once Jayce revives him, the very first thing you notice when you hold his hand again for the first time is how much colder he is. And thus everyone else in the commune has that same sort of... 'something is off' hairs on the back of your neck 'this is the kind of shit dogs bark at' just all around unexplainable bad feeling (because somehow you can subconsciously sense thst everyone is. You know. Kind of. Kind of dead and it's not entirely clear if these are the original people or somehow copies of their consciousnesses)

Wait what's that? You say you don't feel comfortable being boxed in all the time not being able to leave the area and the vibes are honestly just creepy bad here and you're not exactly sure you agree with some of the stuff Viktor is talking about anymore? Did I say "peaceful hippie commune"? Sorry, I meant to say, "dedicated cult hivemind where the second Viktor even remotely suspects you of ANYTHING he has both the people keeping an eye open and he is watching you through their eyes and if you make it known to ANYONE that you're going to leave or escape or whatever the situation is, everyone will drop everything to stop you like it's the fucking Truman Show"

Some HEINOUS fuckshit like, you've got precious items to help you survive or escape hidden under your clothes and you're about to make your getaway and, oh a voice behind you! It's a little girl Viktor healed :) and she's oh so innocently and sweetly asking what you're doing and how nervous you are makes it immediately obvious that you're up to something. You laugh and try and make up a believable lie as soon as you can, "oh, i was feeling really bored so I wanted to jog around!" and she's just like "oh okay! But the jogging paths are the other way, though?" and she's being completely innocent about it. But. You take like. Just a little toooo long to respond, and suddenly she's just, POSTURE SUDDENLY JERKING UPRIGHT, the voice of a full grown man rising up from her throat,

"Please turn back, my love. I would hate to have to chase you"

[insomniac2612]

OKAY. SO. If I hear one more person describe Clary Fairchild as just "short, bad-tempered, and stubborn" I’m going to start biting.

Yes. She is all of those things. She is five-foot-nothing of pure chaos and firecracker rage. But if that’s all you see, then respectfully, your literary vision is BUSTED.

This girl was living a quiet little lie of a life. Drawing art, drinking coffee, going to clubs in Brooklyn because she was so bored with normalcy it made her SKIN ITCH. And then her entire world crumbles in a single night—mom? gone. best friend? in danger. cute boy? might be her brother. And what does she do?

SHE. KEEPS. GOING.

She doesn’t sit down and cry about it (though she has every right to). She doesn’t spiral like a certain emotionally constipated blond (cough Jace cough).She immediately enters action mode. How do I wake up my mom? How do I save my friends? How do I burn down the systemic corruption of an entire shadow government with a stele and a marker because the adults won’t do it? She’s not just a heroine—she’s a revolution in soft converse and sarcasm.

And yeah, she’s stubborn—but do you know how much strength it takes to be stubborn in a world that wants to break you? She’s told no by everyone. She does it anyway. Not out of pride, but because she believes in people. In love. In change.

She dates Simon because she’s trying to follow the rules. She tries to suppress her feelings for Jace not because it’s easy, but because it’s morally responsible. She cares about right and wrong. She cares about social norms and emotional consequences. Jace found out he was part demon and went full Greek tragedy. Clary found out she was part angel and went, “Cool, can I use this to save my mom?” LITERALLY WHAT. HUH? HOW?

And she’s not an optimist either. Not really. If you read her POV, you see it—she doubts, she fears, she sees the cracks in the world. But everyone else sees her and goes: “You bring light.” That’s the point. She doesn’t walk into the room with sunshine. She becomes it.

Also?? Character growth?? She goes from “I don’t trust that girl in the heels” to “Isabelle Lightwood is my ride-or-die and if anyone touches her I will bury them alive.” The development. The humility. The emotional range. She doesn’t stay static. She EVOLVES.

Clary is a contradiction. A dichotomy. She’s hard-headed and soft-hearted. She’s emotionally mature and a complete disaster.

She makes new rules with runes she invented from her own mind and then apologizes if she accidentally hurts someone along the way. She’s the artist and the warrior. The girl who can draw beauty from nothing and then stab a demon in the face without blinking.

So NO, she’s not just stubborn. She’s not just short. She’s not just bad-tempered.

She is a girl who was never supposed to be chosen, and who chose herself anyway.

[ckret2]

Aku in an episode called "Aku's Fairy Tales" tried to brainwash children into liking him and hating the Samurai. I have to ask for your opinion why he never thought to shapeshift into the Samurai using makeup to hide his skin to make people resent the samurai or send a duplicate of the Smaurai to cause chaos . So what do you think on him trying to make people hate the Samurai not by sending an impersonator or becoming one himself to create destruction but using fairytales to try and brainwash kids?

i don't think aku cared about making the people hate the samurai.

his monologue at the start of the episode:

For eons I have terrorized this land. Every miserable creature trembled at the mere mention of my name. The pitiful people shrank before my awesome power. But now I am openly mocked by these measly urchins. Tales of the samurai's heroics have spread through the world like a virus! But I will cure the world of this plague of hope. I will unleash such evil that even the most innocent soul will be consumed by terror!

this is the problem as aku sees it: the people used to fear him; but now he's being mocked. his first plan? make them fear him again.

if people have already been infected with hope, what would slandering jack's name do? would destroying his reputation also repair aku's reputation?

or, when the children play their make-believe games, would they simply invent some other hero to beat up the child they've designated as an effigy of aku?

Their elders still fear and respect the almighty Aku. But this new generation... the seed of rebellion has been planted in them by these tales of heroism. Well, if they respond to stories, I have a tale or two that will turn Aku into the hero of their young hearts.

he doesn't say "that will turn the samurai into the villain of their nightmares." he doesn't care! they can think whatever the hell they want about jack!

but the people need to fear, respect, admire, and love HIM.

When Aku starts telling the children stories, he ONLY tells stories about himself. He doesn't even mention Jack until the children ask for a story about him. And so Aku made Jack sound horrible because he was grumpy the kids didn't like the stories about Aku.

Had they said nothing, he would've just kept telling stories about himself.

Given Aku's motives, he'd have no reason to impersonate the samurai

(and on top of the above answer, I have a totally separate rant that goes off on a long tangent about "why doesn't aku use makeup to impersonate people" so i'm putting it under a read more)

on a narrative level, I feel like "aku wears makeup to hide the fact that he can only do four colors" just... doesn't fit the rules of the world. the myth-like, fairy tale-like feel of the world. Jack is always good because He Represents Goodness, Aku is always evil because He Is Made Of Evil, Aku backstabs people helping him even when it undermines him because he must do evil, Jack's sword is capable of choosing who it can and cannot stab because it's an instrument of virtue, etc.

"Well can't the character logically just do this" doesn't fit the kind of story being told, here. if we're gonna start in on "why didn't aku make better disguises for himself" then we also have to ask questions like "why didn't Aku send Jack a couple billion years into the past where there wasn't yet enough oxygen for him to survive" or "why didn't Aku just get a ton of robots and force them to fight jack one at a time while the others waited so that after like a day of nonstop fighting he'd collapse in exhaustion" or "why didn't aku just wait until after jack was dead to tell the people helping him that he was gonna backstab them"

because the point is that the competence of the plans isn't the point. When Jack and Aku compete, the winner isn't decided by "which one of them has the better strategy," but by "which concept would win this fight: goodness, or evilness?"

so their plans can't be decided by "what's most sensible here" but by "what would Good do in this situation? what would Evil do in this situation?" "what fits the overall tale being told?"

and like... if it was "okay" for aku to disguise himself by putting on makeup, then he wouldn't have been limited to four colors in the first place. narratively there'd no longer be any reason for it.

His color scheme being constricted is a symbolic thing: no matter what form it takes, you can always recognize Evil if you know what traits to look for. makeup defeats the purpose.

... on the other hand the makeup's unnecessary because impersonating jack would've worked just as well if aku had been his usual colors. i mean—

jack's wanted posters aren't in color. most people who recognize jack's face still wouldn't know for sure that he isn't green.

[tickettride]

I know you're hurting || B.C.

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔

pairing is benny cross x f!reader

in which you have no choice but to call benny after being stabbed, even though he's just supposed to be a memory. it was raining when you met him, and it's raining again when he almost loses you. or are those tears in his eyes?

word count: 1,9k

warnings: a lot of blood, angst and panic, mentions of death and hospital, probably a few mistakes

A/N: in a love/hate relationship with this one, but I really wanted to post something here. and look at those eyes? am I strong enough to resist such pathetic eyes? I’m afraid not :/

You had never believed in fate and luck until then. Those were just concepts invented by humans to make others feel less alone. The bikeriders club had imploded, and that was it. The reasons weren’t linked to destiny, just to a few guys looking for trouble. Delusion would lead you nowhere.

But then, why did it have to be you with that hole in your abdomen? 

The question sent you to your knees, breathing heavily in agony. The knife was at your feet, lying in a puddle of blood. Your blood. You had managed to remove it from your stomach with a scream, and now it felt as though it had drained all your energy. 

Your body screamed to lay down and take it easy, but you couldn’t. You had to call someone, anyone, to get some help. A face flashed in your mind, and it made you cry even harder. God, you had no choice. Your parents would kill you, and none of your friends were in town. The few people who had walked by the store—fate had decided they would arrive that that very moment when you were so close to death—had run away in terror, and you were still waiting for someone to get you out of this horror.

So you didn’t think twice. Hoisting yourself painfully, one of your hands pressed hard against your wound as the other reached out for the counter. Within the next minute, you were standing, mustering all your strength to get to that damn phone behind the cash register. 

A small noise escaped your throat when you stepped across the cashier, his eyes forever fixed on the ceiling. You briefly wondered if he had seen your terrified face before getting shot.

The two young men had startled you at first, but you hadn’t thought for one second that they would panic after trying to rob Mickey and stab you to keep your mouth shut forever. 

You swore you knew one of them from school. 

Nearly falling against the wall, you finally managed to take the phone and dial the number you couldn’t forget. He had given it to you on the day you met, his eyelashes wet and dark from the rain.

“In case you need me,” he had explained, the number written on a clean napkin. “Ask for Benny.”

You’d never had the opportunity to call until then. Not when he had been there to protect you. A creep getting a bit too close to you? You just had to meet Benny’s eyes. You had never realized how lucky you had truly been back then. 

The ringing stopped and turned into a buzzing silence. You prayed hard to hear Benny’s voice, but you weren’t lucky. 

“Who’s this?” 

You took a shaky breath, trying hard to keep hope. If Benny wasn’t the one on the other side of the line, then he was surely playing cards or smoking outside. That’s where he spent most of his days—now fate wouldn’t be so cruel as to lead him far away from you on that very day. Would it?

You gave the man your name, only then realizing you were talking to Cal. You hadn’t heard his voice in forever. 

“You’re hurt?” Cal asked, his tone filled with worry. 

“Um-hum,” you replied hesitantly, glancing at the door to make sure no one was coming in. You couldn’t risk him coming to get you. Cal would take at least three guys with him, and the outcome would be bloodier. “I’m fine. Is… is Benny around? I need to talk to him.”

Your vision grew hazy. And the hand holding your stomach felt so wet, so gross. The longer you waited for an answer, the further the panic spread through you. 

“I think so, yeah," Cal mumbled.

And after what felt like forever, Benny said your name. The world rolled off his tongue so beautifully that you couldn’t help but let out a sob of relief, your head thudding against the wall. This fucking man. 

“Hey,” you sounded bashful, so ashamed he was the only person you could reach. 

“Cal said you sounded weird,” Benny said. “What happened?”

Your heart beat so hard against your ribcage it hurt. Benny and you had broken up two months ago for this exact reason: the danger. You couldn’t bear living in a state of constant fear, anxious that Benny would get hurt, or worse. And Benny… he had told you he wouldn’t change. Couldn’t change. Now you had almost died, and you couldn’t even blame him.

It was just your own misfortune. And now, you felt so guilty for breaking things off when that danger was absolutely everywhere. With or without Benny, you wouldn’t escape it.

“I just wanted to run a few errands, and those guys just… they burst into Mickey's store with a gun. They said they just wanted the money, but they looked so lost."

For a long moment, Benny said nothing. “Are you hurt?”

“They’ve stabbed me,” you blurted, and it felt so odd to say the words out loud. Of course, the city had its fair share of thugs and criminals. They were just not supposed to assault a decent store in the middle of the fucking afternoon. “I’m bleedin’ so bad, Benny. It won’t stop bleedin’. I swear they just had guns comin’ in, but—but the tall one pulled out a knife and—"

“Fuck!” you suddenly heard, causing you to startle and hold the phone away from your ear momentarily. “Don’t move, alright? I’m comin’ to get ya.”

“Um-hum.”

No other response came, and you supposed he had already taken off. You had never doubted Benny would show up in a second for you, wherever you were. After all, he had promised you so on the day he had first kissed you.

And Benny was true to his word. Twenty minutes later, while you were pressing your hands on the wound with all your strength, writhing in pain, he appeared in front of you.

From the quick rising and falling of his chest, you guessed he had run through the store to find you there, in the back alley. Like the first time you spotted him, the raindrops fell graciously over the curve of his nose, making you jealous when they kissed his lips. You hadn’t cared about the rain when you had limped outside, just wanting to get some fresh air and the sight of Mickey’s lifeless body out of your sight.

“I told you not to move,” Benny simply said, no hello or I’ve missed your face.

“I couldn’t stay inside with that stench,” you replied cooly, unable to meet his eyes. 

Silence filled the alley for a short time, when Benny finally noticed the blood seeping out onto your shirt. You watched as his eyes went up to your face again, the blood on the floor and your body delivering him to a sudden chill. You couldn’t hide the pain, the tears, and the dread anymore. You were standing there, bare before him, and there was nothing you could do to pretend. 

“Goddamn. What’d they do to ya?"

Benny came closer to take your wrist, but you stopped him, afraid that he would touch it. “No.”

“Let me see,” he rasped, trying to pry your fingers away from your curled-up hand. 

Your panic only seemed to work him up. He gazed at the wound for a long time, and you could almost see the thoughts behind his eyes. Thinking about how he would find those two guys again and make them pay for laying one finger on you. He would find the same damn knife and make them pay for that look in your eyes, filled with worry.

The red liquid ran quickly into the crevices of your palm. Benny said something, but your heartbeat thrumming in your ears made it hard to listen. All you could feel was the blood on your hand, never faltering.

“I think I’m gonna faint," you slurred, losing all strength in a second.

It took Benny even shorter to leap to you and hold your body against him, his warm scent filling your nostrils.

“Hey, you hear me?” Benny was talking in your ear, his strong arm sweeping beneath your knees and lifting you until you were cradled to his chest. “You’re okay. I’ve got ya.”

His voice was barely loud enough to be heard over the rain pouring down. With your head lolling against his neck, you shakily observed your red hand. Wasn’t it supposed to stop bleeding? Why was it bleeding so damn much? 

The sight was as unsettling as it was sickening, freezing you in morbid fascination. 

“Don’t let me die here, Benny,” you heard yourself mumble, your tears mixing with the raindrops.

You looked up at him. His eyebrows were knitted together, rivulets flowing down his cheek. 

“I won’t,” he promised like all the promises he had made back then, and it felt like you were flying, although he was just striding down the alley towards the main street. Your fear was contagious, but not your shame. While you tried hard to ignore the puzzled eyes of the cars driving past you, Benny barely paid them any attention. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Benny snapped you out of your daze, and you realized you were gasping in for a breath, praying they hadn’t ripped something vital inside you. “I know you’re hurtin’.”

The term of endearment made you sniffle hard. Instead of easing the heartache, all it did was break you in pieces again. You wished you could have kissed him right there. Tell him you would do anything to stay alive and give him all the love he needed. Although selfishly, you couldn’t help but love the attention he was giving you.

“We’re gonna get ya taken care of, sweets. You’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.”

A warm kiss was placed on your wet forehead, his mouth lingering for longer than necessary while he battled his instincts and crossed the busy street. Through his affection and the fake determined steps, you could see how terrified he really was. He was just as overwhelmed as you, his features slightly hardening to hide the burgeoning emotions. Benny had lost so many people over the years; you couldn’t be the next one abandoning him.

You almost felt guilty for getting the leather seat of the car wet, but he had softly lowered you before you could say anything and you were hurting too much anyway. You kept your mouth shut as the rain thrashed against the window, and it didn't stop until Benny told you were at the hospital. The smell of it burned your nose, even from inside the car. You didn’t even want to open your eyes.

You hated how dizzy and half-alive you felt, but you hated hospitals even more. 

“Wait,” you stopped Benny before he could get out of the car, and it struck you how upset and frantic he really looked. There was this wetness in his eyes that wouldn’t leave, even when you tried to give him your best reassuring look. 

“I know you can’t stand the place–”

“That’s not it,” you cut him off, and you watched how hard he refrained himself from telling you to fucking hurry. “Can you–can you kiss me? Just in case.”

“You’re not dyin’,” Benny rushed to reply, shaking his head as though the idea was killing him inside. 

"The last thing I saw when he stabbed me was your face. Not my goddamn future or my parents. I saw you,” your voice cracked again. “Please.”

You wished, fervently, that his hands had not cradled your cheek so easily in such an ugly and mundane parking lot. On the few occasions you had allowed yourself to fantasize about the way you would find your Benny again, it had been romantic and beautiful. Not with your hands dripping red, staining his jacket. Not with your wet and sweaty hair glued to your forehead, and the ungraceful whines leaving your mouth when he accidentally touched you where it hurt. 

You clung desperately to his neck, the daze in your mind turning into something less painful. Benny kissed you as if it were the last time, and you sank against his love that came from the pit of his soul, where no one had been able to reach. No one but you. You kissed him back as strongly, one hand clutching his thick, disheveled hair.

“It’s not a goodbye kiss,” Benny warned, glassy eyes set on yours as he shook his head repeatedly. “You hear me? You’re stayin’ with me.”

All you could do was nod as he wiped the hot tear that rolled down your cheek. Fate and all the misfortunes set on your path still made no sense to you, but you supposed it was less scary with Benny on your side. After that kiss, you were certain he wouldn’t leave you ever again. And it wasn’t even delusion.

It started right in the hospital room, where he refused to leave you for more than a minute. You were safe and out of danger—as for now—but Benny wasn’t having any of it.

"I'm stayin'," he kept saying to the nurses, and when he looked back at you with those eyes, you knew he meant it. He would always stay.