#Memory problems

[madpunks]

we are so ableist about memory. people with good memory take for granted the fact that they can recall as much as they can, and use that to taunt, guilt and threaten people with memory issues. many neurotypes and mental illnesses cause memory lapses. traumatic brain injuries can cause memory lapses. brain cancer can cause memory lapses.

even if your memory is good, it's not right to guilt someone because they can't remember something. trust me, people with memory problems are desperately trying to remember: it's just that we literally can't. it is a very literal "i can't remember".

[solidwater05]

Apparently this needs to be said so

Forgetting things is morally neutral! Memory issues are morally neutral!

You're not a bad person if you...

forget things quickly

forget people

can't remember entire stages of your life

can't remember important things

can remember some things very well and forget other things all the time

can't remember things (or anything!) about your interests

forget to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, etc

forget to reply to texts

remember things and immediately forget them again

can't remember birthdays, events, etc

frequently answer 'I forgot' to questions

can't retain new information

forget things you used to know

only remember things when it's too late

have vague, distorted and/or unreliable memories

depend on others to know how an event you were in played out

have other symptoms that are worsened by memory issues and vice versa

... and anything else I might have missed!

[animatedtext]

requested by f-a-b-l-e

[incognitopolls]

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[schizopositivity]

Schizophrenic people: *struggle to identify our feelings* *have memory problems* *can be traumatized by our psychosis* *can have trouble speaking at all* *are afraid to talk about psychotic symptoms because of the intense stigma*

Nonschizophrenic people: So what do you hallucinate? What are your delusions? How do you feel when those happen?

[burntoutuserboxes]

[This user has memory problems.]

[technicolortrenchcoat]

I don't think people without memory loss realize how truly devastating it is and how it changes everything about how you live

They don't realize that the memory loss can be as disabling as to require you to keep a chart of daily activities to check off because you literally cant remember if you did them.

They don't realize that you literally cant graduate from higher education, you cant remember things for long enough.

They don't realize how hard it is to find employment when remembering new instructions is difficult.

They don't realize that you're taking photos and videos and collecting mementos and trinkets and hoarding them because without them the memories literally do not exist for you.

They don't realize that you are grieving every moment that you want to remember, as you are living it, because you know you wont remember it. You know you wont be able to go back to it the way other people can.

They don't realize it even chases you into your sleep. I have the same recurring nightmare every night, and have for years, and it's about losing my memories. Never being able to get them back.

I don't think people without memory loss realize how truly devastating it is and how it changes everything about how you live

even your dreams

[sunshinegremlin]

CALLING ALL PPL WHO STRUGGLE TO KEEP A CALENDAR!

I used to keep a bullet journal years ago but I completely fell off it once COVID began. Since then, I have had no calendar to keep my life together.

As someone with ADHD, a calendar would help me stay sane, but every time I tried to get back into it, no matter what I tried, it never stuck. Therefore, my life was a mess.

But while reading a Webtoon (called "30 Minutes With You" if you're interested, it's really wholesome) the main character does daily doodles in her pocket calendar, and then it clicked.

I've been doing daily little doodles in my pocket calendar and I've generally kept up for two months now! Overall, it's been really fun AND has kept me more put together!

Here is an example:

You can get a pocket calendar from Dollar Tree for $1.25 (if you're in the US and Canada)! I use blank office labels cut into the right size as the white squares I draw on just because it looks better.

This has also really helped my memory, because once stuff happens my brain forgets it immediately. It really makes me feel like my life is fuller and it's been easier to look back and see how far I've come!

Hope it helps! 💛

[hiro-doodlez]

People dont talk about inks memory loss/problems enough so i thought id draw it :3

[chaos-in-one]

"It's important you remember -thing-!"

Girl I barely remember today.

[the-scrapegoat]

A whumpee with terrible memory problems, worsened when under stress until they go blank and/or mute with terror while their mind scrambles to think about anything other than the growing panic fogging up their mind. What are they forgetting, what are they forgetting?!-

[alwaysbewoke]

side-eyeing all the anti-vaccine, anti-masks, "get back to normal," "the kids will be fine" fucktwats hella hard right now. fuck everyone one of you.

[bicripple]

Tips on returning a product to store after the return window

I was never great at returning things on time given my ADHD, but since developing Long Covid it's become way more of a Problem.

It wasn't until that recently that I figured out it is often (not always) possible to get an exception to return policies! 😯

Generally it will be for store credit, and it may not be a 100% refund - a 75-80% store credit is pretty common. (Even if it's not a full refund, it's usually more than what you'd get if you tried to resell it on the used marketplace!)

TIPS

Buy from local, non-monopolistic stores. My experience is that the smaller independent stores tend to be most quietly willing to be flexible about their policies. (Oftentimes it's because the person you wind up talking to is the actual owner.)

Do not expect the refund. If you get it, it's great. Do not go in feeling entitled to it.

In my experience, whether they'll take the item back is not a function of how late you are in returning it. It's a function of how resellable the item looks. Is it still in the original packaging? Is it still in original condition? Did you repack it exactly as it was before? Does it look like it could go back on the floor as-is?

Be ready to buy other things from the store! If it's a brick-and-mortar store, I like to first shop for something I legitimately would want from the store, so that when I show up to the counter to ask my refund I have something in hand that I would use the store credit on. It helps make clear that I'm a returning customer.

Be polite. Show some contrition that you messed up, but enough restraint that it doesn't distract or derail the conversation. A singular apology with a "oops" expression is sufficient before pivoting back to smiling and being nice to the employee.

Keep the excuse simple. That's a singular excuse. You only need one. So it's EITHER "I have long covid and it's impacted my memory" OR "I have ADHD" OR "there was a death in my family and I was out of town and forgot about this". The customer service rep does not need a long story or laundry list of extenuating circumstances. Again, what generally makes the difference is how resellable the item is, not the backstory. Remember this is a business decision on their part.

If they give you the exception: give the store a 5-star review afterwards. DO NOT mention they made an exception to store policy for you. DO praise the staff for being helpful and good at their jobs.

Generally speaking, the stores that have made exceptions for me have turned me into a loyal customer. And oftentimes the staff will remember me as a repeat customer: most local stores rely on their regular customers to keep them afloat.

Many stores understand this as a reason to give a customer an exception. Your results may vary but in my experience, local stores consistently give me at least partial store credit! And it's a big relief to do it: I now have one less useless item sitting in my apartment! 😅

[ix-c-999]

[This post has no DNI other than not to involve it in discourse, mockery, or other harassment]

[schizopositivity]

Why it's hard for schizophrenic people to get treatment and diagnosis for physical health problems:

• Having "schizophrenic" in our charts makes a lot of medical professionals automatically not believe us. Especially if it is a problem that they can't instantly see themselves. They may think we are either delusional or having some kind of tactile hallucinations. They could see it more as a "psychiatric problem" rather than the physical medical problem that it is.

• If you have flat or blunted affect, they may not believe you, especially if you are describing pain. They have the expectations that you would be screaming, crying, grimacing, etc. When you are straight faced and monotone and say "I am in extreme pain right now" they will likely not believe you. And this paired with medical professionals views of chronic pain just makes them not believe you even more.

• Alexithymia makes describing your symptoms very hard, and even harder to describe how the symptoms affect you. The medical professional goes off of what you tell them, if you are vague or don't have the words, they will not understand you or not believe what you are describing. Either way that will hinder your road to treatment and diagnosis.

• Having memory problems, or trouble keeping track of things can also hinder your care. If you can't remember, or even remember to write down how often a symptom occurs, how long it lasts, how it felt in the moment, and how it impacted your life at the time, they may once again not believe you. Diagnosis often requires some sort of timeline or prevalence of symptoms, and not keeping track of that could keep you from diagnosis.

• They may avoid prescribing pain killers (even if you need it) because the fact that schizophrenic people are more likely to abuse drugs than the general population. And while that fact is true, it doesn't mean that someone in extreme pain does not deserve the right to pain killers just as much as anyone else who needs them.

• Being part of a disenfranchised group while also being schizophrenic can have compounding affects on your physical health treatment. Being low-income, being a person of color, being assigned female at birth, being transgender, being intersex, any other disenfranchised group or any combination of these will impact how you are treated by the healthcare system.

• Fear of medical professionals, or fear of Dr.s offices can impact the quality of your visit. You may feel too frightened to tell them how you really feel, you may just completely avoid going into the building at all. This can happen to anyone but is especially common for schizophrenic people due to our paranoia, inability to advocate for ourselves, lack of self esteem, historical medical abuse or personal experiences with medical abuse. Plus we can have doubts about the quality of our care because of any of the other reasons listed above.

And all this occurs while we as schizophrenic people, are at higher risks of several physical health problems (you can read about it here):

[livingdeaddivination]

To anyone who wants to try tarot but thinks they won't be good because of memory problems: do it anyway! Whatever your memory problems are caused by, however severe they might be (within reason, of course), just try! Especially if it's really calling to you. You don't necessarily need to memorize the cards to be good! The guides are there to help you for a reason. If there is no guide or you lost it, sometimes you can find them with a quick google search, or there are apps that you can use for classic tarot. For oracle, can google them, or you can assign meaning yourself. I use Golden Thread Tarot on iOS and Galaxy Tarot on others for classic tarot. The definitions differ everywhere, but I've come to realize it's not so important! Whatever you believe in or whoever you work with will always work with what you have! When you're reading a definition, write down a summary of it so you will not only be able to look back at it after deciphering the next card(s) but, after writing it down so many times the definitions might start to stick! You will also be able to go back and look at past readings, and you won't have to strain yourself trying to remember them! Sometimes this can be a long process, so in person i won't write them down i will just use the guides. I do it any other time, though. If you made it this far, thank you for reading, and i hope this can help you or someone you know!