#Narcisissm

[cutenervousyoungthing]

i know i have a problem

[liberatingreality]

For the youth of today that have not responded by becoming incredibly pissed off, they have responded by becoming incredibly despondent - birthing the kind of philosophical narcissism and ironic distance that is so perfectly embodied by the modern 'hipster.'

Tim Hjersted, People Are Waking Up

[mordcore]

narcisissm is the new boogieman, and boy can i boogie

[notesfromthebirghtside]

Growing up in chaos, your nervous system got used to very intense feelings. That became the standard. When you first fell in love, the relationship was so full of intense trauma-drama that it was matching your pattern completely. Now you’re in a different relationship with a different person… and sometimes you feel bored because it is not as intense as the first one was and maybe you even ‘miss’ that because that felt more familiar. It is safe now. You’re safe now.This is good now. And you have to be very mindful about the choices you make when you feel ‘bored’ of it. You must not choose the path you escaped and healed from just because that feels familiar.

[lesboylycan]

Hey, I love your tags about cool things to be! Seafoam and fungus and a very rad snail. You have really immaculate vibes and it’s always very cool to meet more nonhumans!!

~@narcissism-positivity

:D thank you!! and yeah! we tend to stay out of most nonhuman and alterhuman related tags because of the general stigma around physical nonhumans (+ the fear of the whole "Oh, you're schizophrenic? Clearly your nonhumanity must be a delusion and I will refuse to believe you about your own personal experiences" thing), so it's always nice to find other nonhumans and alterhumans who are accepting/nonjudgmental about that sort of thing

[razzleberryjam]

What's it like being fucking stupid and abelist? :)

-S2

What's it like being unable to admit that you need help

[thaumantic]

I really wish i could make really quick meme art like i’ve seen others do because I get so many ideas that arent funny described but, visually, would be very funny in my opinion. sigh

anyways tldr listeining to antihero by ts  is really funny when u imagine the lines being read by the red prince

[vizthedatum]

I remember seeing the flyers for domestic violence in the bathroom whenever I’d go to urgent care.

I usually would be getting in to check if I had a UTI

It was the easiest way to get antibiotics on short notice

Or to be validated in my IC diagnosis!

Anyway

I’d think to myself -

Well I’d dissociate first -

And I’d think

That’s not my situation

They’re not physically abusive

I’m not scared of my best friend

They would never hurt me

And my body would plunge into more pain as I left my urine sample for the nurse

[nthspecialll]

Cracks open an oyster shell to reveal a slimy half baked fetus esque Dutch van def linde inside

Do you think this sick little freak of nature is neurodivergent… or has any other disorders.. npd… bpd… etc… (no pressure to like. Actually diagnose or anything I’m assuming you aren’t a licensed psychologist, more for character analysis. Thank you so much, love your work!)

Oh he definately has something but yes I am not a psychologist and my experience with ND is limited to autism, ADHD, OCD and dyslexia because those are my family heirlooms, thus I would not feel comfortable diagnosing him but what I can do is present what fits and what does not fit about the most common diagnosises that people put on him as well as pointing out things others with more experience with these diagnosises says.

NPD- Narcissism

Dutch believes himself to be superior to others, which is very visible in many different ways, like his tent being the most luxurious to not allowing Molly, his girl to work. Which is also a big part of his entitlement, he expects others to look up to him, he expects people to treat him well, to cater his every need, and he gets angry when people doesn't.

He lives on admiration, which can be why he leans so heavily over to Micah late game when everyone else pulls their attention away from him, causing him to get angry. This time he is also very unable to handle any critisism thrown his way, reacting aggressively to it rather than listening.

One of the most obvious signs that makes people think narcissism is his willingness to exploit other, from the gang memebers to the native americans, using everything to his own advandage. He even says it himself, he is helping the natives because it helps him.

He created that friendship with Eagle Flies beacuse it boosted his confidence and his image, he lived in Micah's friendship because it fed his confidence and his image.

Narcissists tend to lack empathy and he does state in a camp event with Susan and Arthur "did you hear that Arthur? I am meant to consider feelings now!" and he is also quite arrogant, talking down to Arthur when he tries to come up with a plan in chapter 6.

Now, that said, narcissists cannot form meaning bonds which Dutch has done several times, for example with Hosea and with The Count. They are actually known for being terrible animal owners and are known for being able to fake friendships for a short amount of time while using others, not for thirty years.

Narcissits are also prone to bragging, which we do not hear Dutch nor does he belittle other people's achievements, and while he can seem like he doesn't show feelings and empathy, he does. He is genuiently sorry when Arthur gets kidnapped by O'Driscolls, he is sad when Hosea dies, he listens to John when Jack is kidnapped.

I also would not say he is fishing for compliments, which they are known for, there are also requirements for narcisissm which we don't have enough information on, such as fragile ego and requent self-doubt.

Bipolar

Dutch in the beginning of rdr2 is a very regular dude, he has signs but he seems okay, but as time goes on, especially in chapter 4-6 we see him go up into something that can look like mania.

He does not sleep, he can work without rest. He is easily irritated, his self-esteem is through the roog and he is impulsive. He constantly obesses, he leans over to people who feeds his ego, he is paranoid and he has a lot of grandiosity.

In the first couple of chapters it does also seem like we have some episodes. After settling in Horseshoe Dutch says sorry to Hosea about Blackwater, that he made a fool of himself and doesn't know what happened, similarly with after Arthurs kidnapping.

But then we come to chapter 5-6. What does not fit here however is the fact we don't see a crash, mania cannot go on forever and yet through the months of chap 5-6 there is no crash, he does not return to his regular state. We also see the same things in rdr1, again, no crash and it has been years.

"That said, I've yet to see his crash. The mania, which separates bipolar from major depression, can't just go on forever." which was wisely said by a player diagnosed with bipolar.

Borderline personality disorder

Dutch has a very strong fear of being abanonded, he does not like others leaving him, thus he is willing to leave them first, such as leaving John in jail before allowing him to get out and leave him.

He has a lot of paranoia and looses touch with reality, such as the situation in which he is standing, but also randomly yelling out or talking to himself in chapter 6, similarly he is prone to impulsiveness, doing things that aren't exactly thought through which ends people being harmed.

While he doesn't make threats of self-harm, he did die by suicide, though I would say it was more a powerplay than a fear of abandonment.

He is quickly angered, especially in the later chapters and acts out violently throughout the story

Now we have some other "critiria" like wide moodwings and "Quick changes in how you see yourself," I saw a redditor say this: "Although Dutch sees himself as an anarchistic Robin Hood-type hero during RDR2, he's clearly conflicted by RDR1, presenting himself as both a freedom fighter and a savage who can't fight his own violent nature." And while that is true, it does not fit the critira. It is not a quick change going back and forth but rather a steady but stable decline to that. A lot of people forget that it isn't just a change, but a back and forth we need for this diagnosis, and to me it is more that he is, as said, steadily moving, when he has reached one level of "madness" he doesn't go back.

Then we have a few critera I don't think fits, like unstable relationships, he has a lot of longer, fairly stable relationships such as with Hosea and Arthur and John, those were stable for 30 years before falling apart at the end. Again we are missing the movement back and forth.

End Note

As said, I am not a psycologist and if anything is worded wrongly in a way that may seem offensive, I appologice and please let me know.

[stxriisk]

My theory on the orange side: HE'S NOT LOGAN'S OPPOSITE?

WOW PLOT TWIST I KNOW

so basically I was watching through sanders sides the other day (as you do) and I was making a couple of theories on the orange side, yk average TSS enjoyer activities, WHEN SUDDENLY I WAS STRUCK WITH SOMETHING GLORIOUS

THE SVS REDUX

This is the first hints we see about the orange side (see from the cover screen showing a 7th side and the famous 01134 on the street fighter game sequence) BUT HAVE WE EVER STOPPED TO CONSIDER WHAT ELSE IS IN THIS EPISODE?

At 40:06 of the SVS redux, there is a MUSIC CHANGE (to a track that in my personal opinion sound WAY too funky to be "just for instrumental") and furthermore, Roman says at 40:12, "how long must we act selfishly until Thomas is ready to start putting more... good into the world?". Janus then responds, "A good question, for another time."

Now one might take that as Janus avoiding the question, but I think its strange that it is ONLY IN THIS PART OF THE VIDEO THAT THIS MUSIC PLAYS, when they are talking about being TOO selfish, to the embodiment of LIES. So what does it mean? I believe it symbolises Thomas lying to himself about the existence of the orange side.

SO THE QUESTION YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR THE ANSWER TO - WHO THE FRICKLE FRACK IS THE ORANGE SIDE? In my opinion, I believe it is Narcisissm. Or at least, that's what Thomas VIEWS it to be.

LET ME EXPLAIN-

The first time orange appears in the series is in the episode about SELFISHNESS, and how it shouldn't be mistaken for self care. This is extremely similar to how society treats self-love as a narcisisstic, hence why Thomas would believe this is what the orange side represents.

Now let's look at my favourite thing: COLOURS. WHAT DO THEY MEAN? • Red - This colour mainly represents Passion and Courage (like Roman, the passion is for creativity and the courage is the whole "ill always be your hero" thing) • Yellow - Many people respond to this colour in different ways, some find it cheery, others find it grating (Much like many people have different views on lying and Deceit) • Green - it is sometimes associated with sickness, and too much of it can evoke isolation (much like how intrusive thoughts make people feel sick and that they are alone with these thoughts) • Blue - light shades of blue often represent confidence, peace, honesty and reliability (literally aligning with Patton's existence in a whole) • Indigo - This colour can be seen as knowledgeable, representing integrity and intuition (Do I even have to say anymore, it literally is knowledge, aka Logan) • Purple - Shades of this colour have been used in the care of mental of nervous disorders (Maybe this is why Virgil started wearing purple, to symbolise thomas's better management of his anxiety?)

And now, what about orange? One of the negative connotations of this colour is self-indulgence, which is characterized by doing or tending to do exactly what one wants (much like BEING SELFISH). This would explain the appearance of the orange side in the SVS redux.

"But what about the colour wheel? WHAT IS ORANGE THE OPPOSITE OF?" Before I continue, I'm leaving virgil out of this because thats a whole other can of worms I DONT WANT TO DIVE INTO TODAY, BUT LEMME EXPLAIN

Red and Green are opposites, much like Remus and Roman. They represent both sides of Thomas' creativity - dark and light - so it makes sense.

Heres where things get tricky. LEAVING VIRGIL OUT OF THIS (bcus he's more of a... neutral side I guess? I feel like he doesn't really have a clear opposite anyways) The colour closest to this is actually yellow. This kinda makes sense, as Logan is based on truths while Janus is based on lies.

SO THAT LEAVES PATTON, THE EMBODIMENT OF MORALITY AND SELFLESSNESS. AND THE ORANGE SIDE, WHO I'VE JUST THEORISED TO BE A FIGURE REPRESENTING NARCISISSM AND SELFISHNESS, much like the entire plot of the svs redux.

You might be thinking, "BUT WORKING THROUGH INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS !!! LOGAN WAS ORANGE !!! HOW DOES THAT WORK????" That's because Logan had a selfish goal behind Thomas's schedule, which was being listened to for once. Many people who have narcisisstic tendancies tend to crave attention, much like logan. This part where the "orange side took over" wasn't the orange side himself, it was a representation of Logan's need to be listened to.

Am I saying Thomas Sanders is a narcisisst? No, not in the slightest. Earlier I said that this is how Thomas percieves the orange side, because they're HIS SIDES. He views his self love and desire to be listened to as narcisissm because that's what he's been brought up to believe. It can even be reflected through Patton's behaviour in the SVS redux.

Again, this is JUST A THEORY. I'm not saying any of this is fact. Also special note for these guys:

Colour theory experts (I can't art so my colour wheel analogy is probably so off

People who have NPD/actually know more about it (I want to clarify that this is how I think Thomas PERCIEVES the orange side, not what it is. I'm not diagnosing)

Virgil lovers (HE DOESNT MAKE SENSE IM SO SORRY)

PEOPLE WHO KNOW THE SERIES BETTER THAN ME (Yes I know that the line seperating "opposite sides" is a little blurry)

Thank you and goodnight (you should totally repost this)

[delusionaid]

I stumbled over this sentence in Wrio's stories again:

And no matter how much glory or repute he has earned, he still considers himself to be the same old Wriothesley he's always known. Neither a good person, nor a complete villain. He's just another soul, still living on in this world.

..and I want to say that this is tied to his resilience against corruption and despair in the face of the terrors of his childhood. I believe part of why Wriothesley has managed to become such a good, stable and literally productive member of society despite growing up with neglect and misery, homelessness, a lack of a stable family or any kind of caretaker, and suffering crimes so inhumane that they drove him to murder, is that he's very low on the narcisissm scale.

He doesn't think of himself as the hero of his story, so even though there's confidence and self-assuredness, there's an absence of arrogance or delusions of grandeur. More importantly though, there's also an absence of self-pity or paranoia. Arguably someone in his position could fall into the train of thought where he'd perceive himself as the negative center of the universe, a person chosen to suffer greater misery than most. But he doesn't. He's just another soul. He doesn't seem to perceive what happened to him as cosmic imbalance, as something that sets him apart from the rest of humanity. I wonder if this is in part because he literally had "siblings" who all suffered the same and all the additional trauma he suffered (killing his parents and growing up in prison) were results of his own choices in response to it. Later on in the Meropide he encountered countless more tragic fates and his was just one of many.

Tldr; Wriothesley does not consider himself to be anything special and within that sentiment lies the key to his resistance against delusions of grandeur on the one hand and absolute despair and depression on the other hand. He's not the hero of the story so he isn't meant for greatness, nor is he meant for great suffering. Life just happens to people.

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

npd culture is leon kennedy from og re2 specifically

idk he just reeks of narcisissm to me

.

[narcvampp]

I genuinely cannot stand you, everytime you type it feels like a "ohh heheh erm!!" ☝️🤓 moment. Like you are NOT that smart if you can't even spell HELP right when trying to call something funny. It's not quirky! Or silly! It's just fucking sad and pathetic

And the way you over decorate everything, I know it's just to hide how miserable and how little of an actual personality you have. Freaky fonts or silly ass little overlays for your photos to try and create some sense of having your life together

And you don't need to make your narcissism into your whole personality with your dumb themes. Once again grasping for a semblance of originality when there's hundreds of people just like you on tumblr

Like bless! I wish you good luck with being an actual normal person instead of a mad mishmosh of stupidity and aesthetics and mental illness

The fact you took time to send me this shows you're fucking OBSESSED with me. How'd you even know I "over decorate" everything when my only over decorated profile is my tiktok you freak!

"You dont need to make your narcisissm into your whole personality🤓☝️" As if it isnt a PERSONALITY disorder fagget

I'm a very normal person and many people love me actually <3 You're just another one of the haters who kisses the ground I walk on hoping I'll give you the desperate attention you want

You act as if you arent in my dms sending me shit and chuckling with me, you just want a little kiss!

[loominggaia]

What kind of relationship does SAPHIRRA have with her siblings

I think Saphirra is generally a pleasant person and gets along well with her siblings. Like yeah, she obviously has some psychological issues regarding men and sex, but I don't think this affects the way she treats people outside her romantic relationships.

She is arguably the most problematic of Cerulea's children, yet ironically one of the most pleasant to be around. She's polite, helpful, and loves her family.

She and Lazuline are closest in age but don't have a lot in common. Saphirra is sex-crazed, Lazuline is celibate. Saphirra is a partier, Lazuline is bookish. Saphirra is extroverted, Lazuline is introverted. I think they're polite to eachother but don't really hang out.

No one gets along with Teal because she's insufferable, but Saphirra has the charisma to shut down her bullshit without starting a conflict. I imagine Saphirra has a good sense of humor and uses it to calm tense situations.

Saphirra calls Cyana "pretty doll" and always wants to style her hair, do her makeup, etc. Cyana looks a lot like Saphirra when she was younger, so this could be a bit of narcisissm in action...

Saphirra worries about Marine's future and tries to give her all kinds of advice about how to be a "proper lady", but it's futile. She never gives up though! She's always there to pull the gum out of Marine's hair, wipe the dirt off her face, and tell her that making random animal noises is going to scare boys away.

Saphirra teases Skylie, not in a malicious way but in a playful way, trying to make her laugh and come out of her shell. Like her parents, Saphirra worries that Skylie spends too much time with her nose in a book. But unlike her parents, she isn't mean about it. She just gently tries to nudge her towards other activities, offering to take her berry picking and such.

She takes pride in being Cobalt's "fun sister" who takes him to do dangerous things Cerulea won't let him do, like rowboating, rock climbing, and horseback riding. She tells Cerulea they're just "going bird-watching", then sneaks off to do some wild shit. If it weren't for Saphirra, Cobalt wouldn't get to do anything but homework and throne-training.

*

Questions/Comments?

Lore Masterpost

Read the Series

[tomasorban]

10 Things To Do When You Don't Know What To Do

It's easy to focus when you know exactly what needs to be done.

When you have a project with clear steps, a clear goal drawing you in from a distance.

But after finally achieving a milestone, or accomplishing something, we often say "... OK, now what do I do next?"

Then we're staring at a mountain of 'could dos', each one with its own argument for completion.

I've often faced this kind of issue, so I decided (like I often do) to solve my own problem in hopes that it helps someone else with their own struggles.

What follows are all of the ideas I have about how to choose what to focus on once your top priority becomes a completed project. So you can spend less time analyzing and hesitating, and more time making progress that actually improves your life.

While the truth is: you're never going to be satisfied and completely fulfilled no matter what you accomplish, because every milestone is important, it can still better our lives to accomplish a thing or two.

Let's begin:

1) Don't Chase Perfect, Just Act And Adjust

There's no perfect project, and perfect time to execute it.

You'll do what you do and accomplish what you accomplish when you do what you do and accomplish what you accomplish.

If you're motivated by fear of wasting your time, you'll waste time trying to determine the *best* thing to work on.

As the saying(s) go: 'perfect is the enemy of good/done'.

And while 'measure twice, cut once' is also a popular saying, it's important to remember that the saying *isn't*: 'measure for three hours, and then cut once'.

Make a decision, and use the feedback you're given to decide where to go next.

2) Identify Where You're Currently Stuck or Ineffective

If you want to know what to focus on, figure out where you're currently stuck, or what isn't working.

Ex: You find yourself struggling with public speaking/a specific exercise in the gym/you can't remember the steps to an important process at work

The bigger the pain point, the more likely it is that you should spend your available time addressing it.

3) Assess Your Priorities

The Eisenhower Matrix isn't flashy, but it's tried and true.

What's urgent and important

What's urgent and unimportant

What's non-urgent and important

What's non-urgent and unimportant

It's pretty self-explanatory what might be a good idea to work on there. We can see fires pretty well.

Another way of assessing priorities that I use: Asking what is this dependent on?

If you have a to-do list, ask "what is this dependent on" to figure out what should be your first step.

Ex: You have to write a blog post and it's dependent on an outline, which is dependent on research, which is dependent on generating ideas for a post topic

4) Choose Your Uncertainty And Take What You Get

If you aren't sure where to begin, choose the uncertainty or confusion you're feeling, and take whatever you get.

This might sound airy, or bullshit-ty, but I find that simply choosing and accepting the current circumstances allows the problem some wiggle room to get un-stuck.

Then some ideas begin to trickle in. Your results may vary.

5) Change The Context

I've written about some of this before but try asking yourself "in what context would not knowing what to do be welcome/a benefit/enjoyable" and then see where that taks you.

Like "choosing," it can help get the problem unstuck, partly by making the problem no longer a problem.

6) Use Selective Narcisissm (And Being A Best Friend)

"Illeism" refers to the trick of talking through things in the third-person to think a little more clearly.

Ex: '(Name) has a deadline that they need to meet, so that should be their priority'

While you may not want to do this out loud, or in the presence of others, I've found it to be helpful at times to create a little distance between the us and the confused thought processes that's eating up our time.

Talking about yourself in the third person is more accurate anyway if you subscribe to the idea of anatta, but that's another story.

Another thing that might help is thinking about who your best friend is and then asking what you would tell them to do if they were in your current shoes.

Both of these techniques work to free us from the web of self-talk that lacks perspective in the moments when you really need it.

7) Create Something New To Satisfy Your Craving For Completion

Sometimes when I'm feeling a desire to 'accomplish' something during a stretch of restlessness or confusion, or when I'm running low on time, I try to execute a single creative act.

For me, that's sometimes thinking of and writing just one sentence. For you, it may be something different: maybe drawing, painting, singing, etc.

But when I can say 'at least I accomplished that' it makes it easier to go to sleep knowing something other than work got done that day.

8) Do The Tiniest Step To Solve Your Current Problem

If you're unsure of where to begin a bigger project, figure out what the tiniest step is that you could currently do, and do *that*.

Sometimes that's all that's required to get some momentum behind you, and it could lead you to taking more ambitious action to get done what you need to get done.

9) Create Structure or an Outline

Sometimes, especially when I'm beginning the process of writing something for this website, I get analysis paralysis.

I have a bunch of singular ideas for a piece, and the threads blending into each other lulls me into an inactive sleep.

What helps me escape is when I organize 'like with like' and create an outline so I know which order the different groups of things go in.

Similarly, going to work is sometimes easier for us than spending our free time on our weekends.

At work, we often know exactly what we need to do because there's a guillotine hanging over our heads if we pretend that we don't.

At home, with no Capitalist Grim Reaper casting his shadow over our idle hands, we think 'maybe I should do that ... no, maybe this' etc.

So, one piece of advice is: create habits, routines, or rituals for your home time. Know the essentials you always want to get done.

If you're doing something (or need to do something) at least five out of seven days a week, it's a habitual activity, and it should likely be prioritized. That should be scheduled into your days as if it's coming from the boss that cuts your checks.

Another piece of advice is number 10 on this list:

10) Reverse Engineer It

Ask yourself 'what would need to be true to fail to accomplish the top three things I need to do today'?

Limit yourself to three (because our eyes are bigger than our productivity stomachs) and do nothing else until you've completed those three things.

It's better to go to sleep with no regrets over un-done work than to try to get *everything* done.

Wrapping It Up

Hopefully those aforementioned ten things will help you take action instead of drowning in possibility.

But I have to emphasize a potentially not so inspiring reminder that: no matter what you choose, it's never going to be enough for you.

A checked off to-do will become buried with other inconsequential memories as the new burning priority comes down the pipeline.

That doesn't mean these things aren't worth doing.

We have to do what we have to do when we have to do it. And when we don't, we don't.

It doesn't make it important or unimportant, it just *is*, and we're obligated to execute.

Rather than telling yourself that everything you do is pointless, let yourself have some perspective that, in the end, impermanence will win. And those mountains are really just hills belonging to moles.

[exploding-fountain]

Top 10 kpop songs of February

有吗炒面 (ALGTR) - Lexie Liu. Mandopop lmao. What can I say? It's a beautiful synthpop masterpiece.

Crown On My Head (Yeji) - Itzy. At #17 is the best solo of Itzy.

Love wins all - IU. All the way at #21 is another gorgeous piano ballad from IU. Still sad I can't sing the actual love wins all part.

Abittipsy - Youha. It's the top song of 2023, best synth pop masterpiece of all time, still here at #22!

Shopper - IU. Still on the fence about this one but it's on the list at #33. It's nice enough I suppose but not an IU classic.

Narcisissm - Sunmi. At #35 is my fave Sunmi song! Beautiful, dreamy, love the chorus and the instrumentation.

Chill Kill - Red Velvet. Was torn about this when it first came out but popped into my head one day and now I like it enough to land it a #37 spot on this list.

Welcome To MY World (feat. naevis) - aespa. Def only ended up here cause I put it on my synthpunk playlist. But it is nice and synth-y, so I guess it's nice.

HWAA - (G)I-DLE. At #44 is a beautiful dreamy song by them girls which they ought to get back to making.

I GOT YOU - Twice. Continuing a trend of English pre-releases that a re better than the title track. Classic Twice banger. But a bit too similar to their other songs to stand out, so it's at #46.

Actual top songs are exactly what I'd expected. Heartbeat Highway - Cannons, Runaway - Aurora, Amour censure - Hoshi, two Lorde songs, Hayley Kiyoko, Fall Out Boy and Imagine Dragons. As it should be. Top artists were Taylor Swift, Lorde, Itzy, Halsey, Twice, (G)I-DLE, Imagine Dragons, Aurora, Olivia Rodrigo and IU. Exactly what I'd expect. Except for Olivia Rodrigo. Not sure how she made it there.