#THING IS she already knew about it!! she knew someone else took my device!! like why would you let that happen!!

[glitteronadumpsterfire]

[signedkoko]

HEHEHHEE OPEN REQUESTS???

Hello koko! I was summoned by your open requests, and I just had an idea, how about headcanons/one shot for Alastor and Vox (separately) with a reader who has powers a bit like Toge Inumaki in JJK?( I saw that you were watching JJK so I assume you know how his powers works) like what do they think about it? how do they react when reader uses her powers? How they communicate with her?

THANKS FOR READING MY REQUEST DEAR KOKO! HAVE A GOOD DAY/NIGHT

-🐚

Alastor | Vox X Reader [Romantic]

In which your speech causes action, so you can't speak unless you wish to control others. Reader is female.

When you first came to the hotel, Alastor was not impressed

You were certainly a gorgeous sight, but it was ruined by the device in your hands that you had your nose buried in, screen lighting ruining your face

It took him quite a while when he heard strings of words emanating from the device to realize you were speaking through it, your fingers pressing on keys faster than he could follow

You introduced yourself to everyone that day, as a new hire for the hotel, and how you couldn't speak but hoped it wouldn't get in the way

He was certainly irked by the device in your hands, but it was funny to see someone so weak that they had to rely on a flimsy device made by an even flimsier overlord

Truly a shame

You learn the hard way not to get too close to him while using your device, or else it starts to act up and get damaged

Alastor still spoke to you; of course he did! Because he was amused knowing you couldn't retort

But eventually, without noticing, he would talk more and more, filling every aspect of the silence between you

You were the best listener, both since you had no choice and because you didn't give any shitty advice

The only thing that weirded him out was the weird clicking he started to hear around you

Something about it was so familiar

J-E-R-K-J-E-R-K-J-E-R

When he looked down at your hand and saw a clicker in your hand, he realized what you were doing

Of course he knew morse code by heart! He studied all sorts of things, but he wasn't sure why you'd do things that way when you had a much easier device

Unless you did it just for him?

R-K-J-E-R-K-J

" And who are we calling names, my voiceless companion? "

Y-O-U

Still, it's very touching to see you go from using your phone to putting it away when you come to him to talk

And not much changes since you can't get out too many words with your morse method

One evening, while on a walk together, Alastor was reciting to you how he'd come to work for Charlie and how she sang on the news for so many to see! When a group of assassins surrounded the two of you, angel steel weapons were on full display

Before Alastor handled them—which, let's be fair, would be no issue to him—you pulled quicker on the draw

" COMATOSE. "

You yelled it with your hands clamped over Alastors ears, and the instant the word came out, they all dropped, beyond unconcious

Alastor laughs, because wow, that was quite the display!

But he's already dragging you over them to continue talking, now teasing you for treating him like a helpless damsel

He was certainly glad that he hadn't made an enemy of you when he first saw you, because you may stand a chance against him with an ability like that

Most sinners had some kind of ability that grew with their power, often souls under contract or training enhancing them

Vox himself had plenty of tricks under his sleeves, and he'd seen the most pathetic of abilities to those worth cowering before

But he'd never heard of something like yours

Overlords loved showing off their resources, which could include people who became very useful in battle

You were a 'friend' of Zestial, though, while most jumped at the opportunity to introduce themselves to other overlords, you only waved

Of course you piqued his interest, because when he ran his servers over you, he found little to nothing beyond pictures

After several days of stalking video feeds, he caught you and Zestial together when—oh fuck! You sign!

While he could have just waited for the next opportunity, Vox was far too invested in your story and opted to pay Zestial a visit, if it meant he could see you

From what he could tell, you were using ASL, so once he bumped into you he began signing his typical introduction

Something about his heart sparked when he saw you smile, the way those curious eyes sparkled

He was immediately embarrassed when you revealed he didn't have to sign because you could hear

But he was all healed when you signed that you were very glad to have met someone else you could talk with

Vox is used to the overstimulation of noises from news, music, footage, all of it always beaming into his head so much that the silence around you is eerie and takes him awhile to get used to

Zestial certainly has an ace; one Vox is jealous of

Since you got along so well, you and Vox schedule meet-ups so you can interact, seeing as he and Zestial are almost exact opposites

The first time he witnesses your powers is when Alastor shows up at one of your meetings, and he was certainly trying to embarrass Vox in front of you

But Vox was your friend, and you had no tolerance for Alastors threats

" Silence. "

From your lips poured a thick fog, which whisped its way over Alastor's mouth, forming a seal that prevented him from speaking

The radio demon wasn't pleased, but he wasn't about to act up a scene right now, so he turned and left

Vox immediately fanboys because, oh my FUCKING GOD, you showed him!!!

Wait, you can talk? You sound like that?

YOUR POWERS DID THAT???

He is about to waste your evening asking all kinds of things, you probably can't sign as fast as he can ask, too

Author's Note - Conch anon gets only the BEST of the BEST!!! I did like writing these anyways though, because i adore Inumaki...thank you for requesting!

[dovveri]

in my head

synopsis: you're paired with your crush and resident popular girl on campus for a project for the rest of semester

warnings: maybe a swear word or two

w/c: 5.5k

a/n: I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED THE REQ IM SORRY TO THAT ANON who requested this and also sorry it took me so long to get around to this i just couldn't think of anything to write bcs i alr did the nerd momo x popular reader fic and i fear this trope is too overdone for sana so... there is nothing rly original here LOL i stroogled i lwk wish i did not fill this req bcs i hate this fic HAHHA i gotta learn to say no ><

༺☆༻

“alright class, pair projects for this semester will be randomly assigned.”

there are collective groans from around the room but you only pray that you get a partner who knows what they're doing. you didn't really have a problem doing group assignments all on your own, it was better quality that way anyway, but it'd be nice if someone else could contribute a little every once in a while.

"check your emails for who your partner is. please get acquainted and exchange contact details before next week."

everyone quickly pulls out their phones, laptops, or whatever device they use during class, you follow along, logging in and scrolling to find the correct email.

minatozaki sana.

before you can even conjure up the thought oh shit she's skipping up to your table with a bright smile.

"hi! y/n?"

you sputter, unable to look at her, choosing to fiddle with your screen and panic scroll through random weather predictions and calculator apps. yes, plural, apps.

she's hard to ignore though, bending down and tilting her head so you're forced to look at her. when she catches your eyes she smiles again, "we're working together on the project this semester."

"u-uh y-yeah i s-saw."

"mhmm. wanna exchange numbers now?"

"oh! right yes of course sorry." you fumble, handing your phone to sana. she giggles, taking it from your hand and replacing it with her phone.

"cute background."

"oh that's- i'm not-"

"it's okay y/n. i'm a closet glee fan too." she winks at you, handing back your phone with exceptional speed.

you curse under your breath, quickly typing your number in and handing her phone back, thinking about the brittana wallpaper you have set on your homescreen. why did you have to be such a nerd?

"thanks! i'll text you later and we can meet up sometime this week to talk about the project?"

"y-yep. that sounds g-good."

she smiles that bright, blinding smile again, turning with a flourish and skipping over to her friends.

you were so fucked.

༺☆༻

minatozaki sana was the most popular girl on campus. captain of the cheerleading team, notorious for her ditzy charm and line of admirers. girls like that weren't exactly the type to be top of the class or put much effort into their studies. they were already guaranteed shoo-ins at major marketing or HR firms that liked pretty faces to hike in business, if they weren't already signed to modelling or acting gigs that was.

it also didn't help that you were at the wee end of her long, long line of admirers. you hadn't intended to fall for her. you knew it was completely unrealistic, you'd bet she didn't even know your first name until she got paired with you. so you knew what you were getting into when you first started paying a little more attention to her in class, noticing small things about her like the way she'd scrunch her nose when she was confused or didn't know how to do a question, or the way every time she'd get even remotely excited her left foot would start tapping, like a puppy wagging it's tail when it gets excited. you couldn't help but notice these things and who could you blame? it was minatozaki sana, you certainly weren't the first to fall for her charms, just definitely the most unlikely to actually end up with her.

so it was fine that you were paired up. totally fine. you didn't mind putting in the extra academic work if it meant you didn't have to speak to sana or even mildly interact with her. you were fine doing everything on your own so that she, or god forbid, any of her popular clique would never be able find out about your embarrassingly impossible crush for sana.

santana💜: hi! is this y/n?

you blink down at your phone. this was not who you thought it was. there was no way.

y/n: who's this?

santana💜: im sana! i named myself santana in ur phone bcs of ur brittana wallpaper ;) yk... ur brittany bcs ur a secret genius and im santana bcs... well our names are kinda similar!

y/n: oh... haha right. yeah this is y/n

santana💜: would u be free to come over tmr? to get a headstart on the assignment? or i can go over to urs instead if u want :)

y/n: oh it's fine sana u don't have to pretend to do anything. idm doing the whole thing and submitting for both of us i won't tell the teacher dw

santana💜: what?! who do u think i am y/n?! im not just going to let u do the whole thing on ur own! come to mine 8pm tmr ok? i'll text u the address later

you stare down at your phone. okay so that plan wasn't going to work. you could be cool though. this would be fine. totally fine.

y/n: ok

༺☆༻

you knock on the door of the address sana gave you after her cheer practice. you had spent the past day overthinking exactly what was going to happen, whether or not sana really did want to contribute or if she was still just doing this for show. or if something even more sinister was planned, probably not by sana, but you'd seen some of the people she hung out with, you wouldn't put it past them to go back to their high school bully ways and pull a prank on a nerd like you, even at their adult age.

but when sana opens the door with a beam, her smile is bright and seems devoid of any hidden intentions. you honestly feel a little bad that you had doubted her when she's looking at you like that. but you remind yourself that sana was just that sweet of a person, she looked at everyone like that, you weren't special.

you cough awkwardly, offering a polite smile and stepping in.

"my housemates are out tonight so we have the whole place to ourselves."

"oh cool."

"do you want anything to drink?"

"just water would be great thanks."

"you can go ahead to my room. it's the second door on the right. the bathroom's right opposite it as well if you need to go or anything. i'll be with you in a sec." she smiles at you again, going off towards the kitchen to prepare some snacks and your water.

you tentatively step further into her home, feeling very out of place, but also curious at the pictures and trinkets everywhere, your first glance into sana’s real life.

you follow her directions, walking towards her room and stepping inside, not really surprised at the pink-tone hues that greet you.

sana’s room is cute. she has polaroids and film prints of her and various friends and family hung up next to her bed, a pinboard with small reminders decorated with stickers and more pictures, posters stuck up with and fairy lights strung across various surfaces.

“sorry it’s kinda messy. i haven’t cleaned in a little.”

you turn at the sound of her voice, suddenly finding her much less intimidating in her pink fluffy slippers, suddenly she just seemed like another girl, not the person on the pedestal that you, and most of the campus put her up to be.

you smile, genuinely this time albeit still a little awkward, “it’s fine. i don’t think it’s messy at all, i like it, it’s cute.”

“really? you don’t think it’s childish or anything?” sana pouts slightly as she settles a tray of snacks and water on the table next to her bed and then sits down, shuffling the various amount of japanese plush toys around.

“not at all.”

she grins then, gesturing for you to sit.

you follow suit, crossing your legs and sitting on the floor, taking out your laptop and papers from class. “so have you had a chance to read over the assignment brief yet? it’s okay if you haven’t, i was honestly surprised you asked to meet up so early, technically the only assignment for this week was to exchange contact details.”

sana slides down so she’s on the floor next to you, knees touching, you don’t see it because you’re focused on the fact that your skin was now touching and she was close enough for you to smell her designer perfume, but she pouts before speaking, “do you seriously think i’m just some slacker y/n? i asked to meet up because i wanted to get this assignment out of the way while it’s still early in the semester. before things get busy and we both get swamped with our other classes.”

“o-oh right i’m sorry! i didn’t mean to… well yeah anyway... so i was thinking-"

"you totally thought i was a slacker didn't you?" you can't ignore her when she peeks around to eye you.

"i- well-"

"it's okay. most people think we're all just bandwagoners and yeah i admit i know some of the people i may be... affiliated with are those types of people, but i'm here because i wanted an education and i'm serious about it. so don't try and do all the work on your own okay? we'll split it evenly."

you're more than embarrassed now. you had boxed sana into a stereotype that she was obviously aware of and actively against. “right i’m so sorry oh my god- i didn’t mean to- i-“

she laughs then, hitting your shoulder playfully, your skin burns at the contact, “it’s okay y/n! you’re adorable. thanks for wanting to do everything at first but i can handle my own and i won’t let you down!”

you blush, looking back down to your papers but comprehending none of the words on it. "right. i'm sorry again... and thank you." you manage to mumble out.

sana giggles internally, finding you very cute. and she loved cute things as evidenced all over her room.

༺☆༻

the following weeks you start spending a lot more time at sana's place, to the point where you've met all her roommates and their partners, and it doesn't feel weird for them to see you around the house. it was a pretty rigorous assignment and it involved a lot of hands-on research and time dedicated to it.

you're still complete strangers at school though, sana was still the popular it girl, always surrounded by groups of people, while you were the nerdy nobody.

so it definitely comes as a shock when sana slides into the seat across from you while you're eating your lunch peacefully alone in the cafeteria, mindlessly scrolling through tiktok.

your eyes almost bulge out of your head when you look up and see her bright smile, scrambling to make space for her and take your airpods out, almost knocking your juice popper off the side of the table in the panic.

"s-sana! what are you doing here?!" you're pulling the straps of your bag towards you so it's no longer occupying the table space opposite you, that obviously meant that spot was occupied, a cue sana chose to cheerily ignore.

"just saw you eating alone and wanted to join you!"

"o-oh. you don't have friends waiting for you?"

she shrugs, plucking a fry off your plate, "not really."

you shrink into your seat as you feel the eyes of the cafeteria land on you and sana, whispering and pointing at you. you’ve never wished more for the floor to swallow you up than in this moment.

“so i was thinking-“

“sana! what are you doing here?”

oh no. you did not need any more attention on you right now. least of all from park jihyo, student council president, and kim dahyun, student council treasurer, both of whom were on the same level of popularity as sana with just as many admirers.

jihyo slides in right next to you while talking across to sana, dahyun happily greeting sana and sliding in next to her with her lunch tray.

“jihyo! dahyunnie! i thought you both had a student council meeting right now?”

“got postponed. our secretary fell sick and we can’t proceed without her so we just decided to wait until she got better.”

they fall into easy conversation while you shrink even further into yourself, squeezing your arms into your sides so you’re not made known to the other two who still haven’t acknowledged your presence.

“ugh practice was such a drag today.” yoo jeongyeon slides in next to you, still in her lacrosse uniform, throwing an arm over your shoulders without seeming to realise who you were. you flinch at the action.

this was so not happening to you right now.

hirai momo slides in next to sana, eyes trained only on her tray as she mumbles a greeting with her mouth full with food already.

oh good lord what did you do to deserve this?

at least you’d met momo before since she was one of sana’s roommates but she still only really knew you as ‘sana’s project partner’. the others you’ve only seen from afar, and until now you were half-convinced they weren’t really real, too far up the social ladder to ever be associated with the likes of you. jeongyeon was the star lacrosse player and team captain of your school, which was renowned for it’s lacrosse team. hirai momo was apparently roped into playing lacrosse but really excelled in the world of dance. apparently she’d already had experience touring as backup dancers for major hit singers.

jihyo wrinkles her nose, speaking over you to jeongyeon, “yoo jeongyeon you stink. didn’t we allocate an extra $3000 to shower renovations last year? we did not do that so you could continue to sweat all over me.”

jeongyeon sticks her tongue out at jihyo, “i was hungry. besides i’m not sweating all over you. and you don’t mind do you- wait- who are you?”

your eyes widen when you realise jeongyeon’s now addressing you, and then suddenly the entire table’s eyes are on you.

you feel your face going bright red, coughing awkwardly and staring down at your plate of food. “u-um-“

“this is y/n! she’s my friend!”

you look up to see sana beaming at you.

“oh… how do you guys know each other?”

“we were paired together for that pair project i was talking about- you know for my class about sustainable engineering? momoring knows!”

momo grunts in acknowledgement, offering you a fleeting smile before returning back to her food, not entirely interested with this conversation.

“wait- how does momo know her and i don’t? momo spends all of her time in the dance studio, and if she’s not she’s only ever focused on food!”

“maybe you should be a better student council president and know all your students then hyo.”

im nayeon, co-head cheerleader along with sana, her title alone demonstrating her popularity status, teases jihyo with a grin, standing at the end of the table in her cheer uniform, commanding all attention from anyone who wasn’t already watching your table in curiosity.

“oh shut up nayeon.” but jihyo quickly turns to face you, offering a hand and a bright smile, “hi y/n! it’s nice to meet you! i hope we haven’t been giving you too much trouble.”

you quickly shake your head, taking her hand gingerly, surprised at the strong grip she has.

“momoring and nayeonnie have already met y/n because she’s been over at ours a lot to work on the project together.” sana perks up again, and then looks at you again, not that her eyes have really left you but you didn’t know that, “sorry for all this by the way. my friends are obviously people blind.”

“speak for yourself sana. the amount of times you’ve called out the wrong name in bed-“

sana flushes bright red, shooting up and slapping a hand over nayeon’s mouth while the others crack up in laughter.

"ignore her y/n. she doesn't mean that."

sana smiles through her teeth while nayeon makes muffled sounds of disagreement, and honestly it is a little funny so you can't help but laugh alongside them.

in the end, you don't mind too much that sana's friends invaded your lunch time. they were a lot less intimidating than you had thought they would be, similar to how you had judged sana prior to actually spending any time with her. it was still awkward to feel the eyes of jealous onlookers but sana stealing food off your plate every few minutes and making sure you were included in the conversation was enough to make you feel welcome and ignore those looks.

༺☆༻

"y/n! i got those projections we were talking about last week." sana bounds up to you outside your lecture hall.

"sana? how did you even know i had class at this time?"

"i asked around." she shrugs as if it wasn't a big deal for her to actively be looking for you and for her to know your schedule, "here- what do you think?" she hands over a few documents and you shuffle to the side so students can continue moving in and out. that also meant you were basically boxing yourself into the small corner next to the door with sana blocking your way out. you can feel a few weird glances look your way, wondering how you of all people knew one of the most popular girls on campus.

"it looks good sana."

"great! are we still on for tomorrow night? coach put nayeon and i in charge of practice this week but i may have bribed nayeon into running it herself so we can spend some more time on the project without her nosy self at home."

you nod, handing back her papers, "yeah, i'll be over around 6?"

"sounds good! see you then!" and then she's kissing your cheek and flying off before you can react, your hand coming up to touch where she had pecked you seconds after she's gone.

"-don't know what she sees in them."

"right- you think y/n's paying sana or something?"

"no way sana would do that though. i bet she's just using y/n for help with study or whatever."

"nah i've seen sana's marks, she doesn't need the extra help. maybe she's just toying with y/n. could be a dare or maybe she just has a nerd kink, or wants to try it out once and drop her."

"oh true hahaha i'd almost feel bad for y/n but it is pretty funny watching her prance around sana like she has a chance."

the sounds of laughter drift down the hallway as you stay rooted to the spot, completely invisible to the rest of the student body.

were they right? was sana just pulling you along? fuck you were so stupid. of course she knew you had a crush on her. everyone had a crush on her. you thought you knew sana but now you were starting to doubt your perceptions of her all over again. ugh you couldn't do this. you felt so embarrassed thinking about the amount of time you've spent with sana. all that for her to just be stringing you along, maybe even laughing behind your back with all her friends, you were so stupid for thinking you'd ever move out of your miserable social status. you were at the bottom of the social hierarchy, and she was at the top, it would always be that way, and people at the top don't want anything to do with people at the bottom unless it's for their own benefit or entertainment. sana was not an exception.

༺☆༻

santana💜: hey u still coming over? i maaaay have tried to cook dinner for us both even tho momo always warns me not to step foot in the kitchen and ig she was right this time... so i'll order takeaway? thai food okay?

santana💜: everything okay? sorry if thai food wasnt ur style >< i can order sth else instead but the foods getting cold :((

santana💜: im guessing ur not coming :( hope everythings okay w u!! ill see u at school soon 🥺

༺☆༻

you’ve been trying your best to avoid sana ever since you overheard what those people thought of your relationship with her. it was difficult when she would send you daily texts asking where you were and how you’ve been, even i miss you texts with the little sad face emoticon that had your fingers aching to text her back but you resisted. this was for the best.

but of course as soon as you started avoiding her you also started seeing her around campus a lot more than you used to. she’d pop up everywhere you were, at the library, in the hallways, on the fields, you’d always manage to shy away from her gaze but you don’t think she was doing this on purpose. maybe it was just the fact that because you were avoiding her, you were a lot more noticeable of her presence.

it was hard to keep this up though, especially when the time of the week came that you shared the class you had been assigned project partners in. you had seriously considered faking sick when you woke up in the morning, thinking she could manage class on her own and you’d just email her your parts of the assignment or something. but you got out of bed reluctantly and trudged to class, coming up with as many excuses as possible for having not responded to any of her messages and ditching your last meetup.

you sigh in relief when you walk into class and see that people are still milling about, slowly trickling in, and sana’s seat is still empty. you slink to the back of the classroom, pulling your hood up and turning on your laptop to tap mindlessly at the keyboard, hiding your face behind the screen.

you can hear when the class starts filling up, sliding down further in your chair and avoiding eye contact with everyone.

you can also hear the moment sana walks in, flanked by her friends with that high-pitched laugh and sunshine energy, the class suddenly seems twice as bright as it was. god you missed her. and that was pathetic of you! she didn’t even care about you! you stay resolute in your avoidance, only allowing yourself a second to bask in her voice before closing yourself off again from the outside world.

it’s only when the teacher walks in and starts reading the roll, that you have to squeak out a small ‘here’ when they read out your name. you avoid her gaze when you speak up but you can see in the corner of your eye, sana whips her head around and stares at you with wide eyes, her mouth open in surprise. you shrink back down but she continues to stare at you for a few more seconds before frowning and facing back forward when her name is called out.

you spend the rest of class hiding behind the screen of your laptop, formulating a plan on the fastest way to get out of class once it's over so you don't have to talk to sana.

unfortunately, the teacher seems to have taken notice of your lack of participation, when usually you're the only one in the class who is able to answer their questions, or even mildly paying attention, so you're pulled back when you try to escape, the rest of the class chattering excitedly while leaving class.

"what's wrong y/n?"

"nothing. sorry, just not feeling the best today."

the teacher eyes you, "is the pair project going alright? you didn't sit with sana today."

you gulp, "it's fine."

"are you sure? if sana's making you do all the work you'll tell me won't you?"

your eyes widen, "no! no sana's a sweetheart she-" you catch yourself, sana wouldn't really be a sweetheart if she was playing with you would she? "she's been great, she's contributing and pulling all of her own weight and more. to be honest... i'm probably the one who's not doing my part right now..."

the teacher hums, "alright y/n. let me know if there's anything i can do for you. go home and rest."

you nod, adjusting the straps of your backpack and trudging outside.

only to find sana waiting outside the classroom with her arms crossed, tapping her foot in the way she does when she gets annoyed.

as soon as your outside she doesn't spare you a second glance, grabbing your wrist and dragging you to the closest empty classroom and closing the door behind the both of you, standing against it so you have no way of escaping.

"wh- sana! sana what are you doing? i have class!"

"no you don't. the only class you have on wednesdays is the one we share. after that you normally go home or to the library before getting dinner outside."

"what- how do you- have you been stalking me?"

she frowns, "have you been avoiding me?"

"i- what makes you think that?"

"you didn't come last week. and you haven't been answering any of my messages. and i'm not stalking you i just thought we were friends and i like to know my friends' schedules, so when you didn't turn up to any of your usual study spots...i got worried. i thought you were sick or something. but then i saw you at the dessert shop outside the council centre where i volunteer and you didn't look sick at all. in fact, as soon as you saw me you were healthy enough to run off."

you gulp nervously, stepping back, only for sana to step forward. your eyes flit around, looking for any possible exit or distraction, anything would be better than confronting sana right now.

"i just- um- i-"

sana pouts, "did i do something? you'd tell me if i did right?"

"no! you didn't do anything. i just- um-"

she raises an eyebrow. you fiddle with your fingers, unable to look her in the eye.

"w-what do you want with me?"

sana doesn't seem to expect this answer. "what do you mean?"

you sigh in frustration, running a hand through your hair, "it doesn't make sense. why would you want to be friends with me? you're popular and smart and beautiful and you don't hang out with people like me."

"is that what this is about?"

"no- well- yes- i overheard the other day, some people talking about how you were only using me or that you didn't have good intentions with me and i just- i didn't know what to do."

"and what do you think?"

you look up at her then, her gaze is steely, there's no hint of her usual smile. "w-what?"

"is that what you think of me? that that's the kind of person i am? that i'd do that to someone?"

you're taken aback, "i- n-no! i-"

"then why did you listen to them? you're not stupid y/n i know you can form your own opinions on people. you're not like the others, or at least i thought you weren't. i didn't think you'd judge people off of what you've heard about them, i thought we were friends y/n."

"i didn't i- we are- i just-"

you take another step back, needing to create distance between the two of you, needing to think without sana's presence making your head all muddy. but with each step back you take, sana takes one forward.

"was there something else? were you looking for a reason to avoid me?"

another step back, another step forward.

"no! i- i didn't-"

"tell me the truth? please?" you're backed into the wall, nowhere left to go, and sana only steps closer. you can feel your heart rate picking up at her proximity, she's looking up at you, puppy eyes and a pout on her lips, you were so weak.

"n-no i don't- there's nothing else-"

"hmm." she's so close you can see the way her eyelashes flutter when she blinks, can feel her breath on your lips.

you can feel how hot your cheeks are, sweat collecting in your clenched fists. she's studying you, eyes flicking over your face, when your tongue pokes out to wet your lips, purely out of habit and stress, her eyes dart down and watch the movement, snapping back up to your eyes once you were done.

and then suddenly, she blinks and there's a change in the atmosphere. there's a curl of her lips, her eyes conveying something you can't quite decipher.

"do you... like me y/n?"

you blush impossibly brighter, "i-i- well- i-"

then her lips are on yours, just the barest brush of her skin against yours, like a sigh against your lips, but when she pulls away, she doesn't go far, her lips still hovering over yours, looking up at you through her eyelashes.

"it's okay if you do."

you're completely dumbstruck, hand twitching, wanting to reach up and feel your lips, to see if this was really happening.

"because i'd be lying if i said i didn't find you attractive."

your mind goes blank, struggling to catch up. "w-what?"

"i don't kiss just anyone. nayeon may have made that comment about how many people i bring home but none of them compare to you. you're different. you don't want me just because i'm pretty and easy."

"i- i-"

she leans in, pecking you softly again, before leaning back fully to give you space, turning on her heel. "think about it y/n. once you have an answer, stop avoiding me. you know where to find me." and then she's stepping outside the classroom, and you feel like you can finally breathe again, letting your brain catch up to what your body just experienced.

༺☆༻

it takes you a few days to fully come to your senses.

sana stops actively searching for you, but you still see her around campus, only she seems to have decided to give you space, not acknowledging you if you saw her in public or walked past her.

so sana obviously knew you liked her. it just didn't make sense that she could like you too. you took days trying to find any way this could've happened, tracing over every interaction you've had with her in your head over and over, trying to find any clues for her feelings towards you.

it crossed your mind briefly that this was another one of her possible ploys to embarrass you. but she was right when she confronted you, you didn't think she was that kind of person, and none of her actions or the time you've spent with her indicated that she was that kind of person, you needed to trust your own eyes and feelings, sana was being genuine.

it just baffled you how this was possibly genuine, how it was possible for sana to like someone like you. and the only way you'd be able to find out was to talk to her.

you inhale, standing outside sana's apartment. you knew momo had dance practice at this time and nayeon had told you she wouldn't be home because she was meeting up with some friends, so it would just be sana at home.

you knock tentatively, stepping back and collecting your thoughts.

it doesn't help though, because when the door opens, all comprehendible thoughts fly out of your mind, replaced with the mental energy required to memorise sana, her hair up in a messy bun, oversized t-shirt and sweatpants, large glasses on, looking like she just woke up from a nap.

sana's eyes brighten when they see you, leaning against her doorframe and raising an eyebrow expectantly.

"h-hi sana."

"hey yourself. what are you doing here?"

you take a deep breath. you had prepared for this. "why do you like me?" well that was not what you had prepared.

sana smiles amusedly, "i told you. i like that you see me for who i am rather than who i present myself to be. i think you're very cute, you get along well with my friends, you're incredibly smart, and even though you think a little too much over what other people say, we can work on that."

your eyes widen at her answer.

"it's simple y/n. do you want to be with me or not? don't overthink it. we can work out any issues that come up overtime."

"i..." you look down to your feet, blushing, then looking back up to her, "yes. i do want to be with you."

sana grins then, not missing a beat, swooping in and kissing you gently, tasting of berries and sunshine. when she breaks apart, finally welcoming you into her apartment, she teases, "i finished our project by the way. you owe me. but i'll accept kisses as payment."

you whine, finally letting yourself be free around her, no longer hesitating to do what you've wanted to this entire semester, bring her up into a kiss that hopefully makes up for the utter loser you've been in her presence.

[cheshirebitch]

ℕ𝕠𝕥 ℝ𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝕆𝕡𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕚𝕥𝕖𝕤

(Alastor x Angel Dust’s Sister!Reader) pt. 2

It really has been a long time, huh?

( previous ) -> ( next )

I have never seen Anthony look at me like that, as though I’m the villain destroying his life. But, last I checked, he was the one going by the real villain that actually did take his life. It was purely distasteful with his choice of name, let alone the fact that was his porno name. What was so wrong with his actual name?

“Listen toots, I didn’t want to ask you for help. We didn’t have any other choice.” The venom spat back at me made my eyes narrow at him. What the fuck is his problem? All of this attitude is not how Anthony would talk to me. It felt like this whole new persona was taking over who he really is. I wanted to rip him apart, but not in front of these people. I can’t let everyone know my weaknesses, even if they pretty much all knew tiny parts.

“I get that. So I’ll ask again, what did you need help with?” I seethed through my teeth, feeling the watching eyes of all his friends. I only tensed up at my own attitude when I remembered Alastor and Lucifer were here too. I rolled my eyes closed and took a deep breath in and out before having an eerily calm aura surrounding me. Knowing I wasn’t going to get an answer out of the pissed off porn star brother, I looked towards Charlie. I could tell I made her nervous, shivers running down her spine before she straightened herself out and answered me.

“Well, I’m sure you’ve heard that we- uh-“ She glanced back at Lucifer who was wide eyed back, shrugging slightly as a response.

“That you,” pointing at Niffty with a smug smile, “killed the great and Holy Adam? Yeah, hard to miss when it’s being broadcasted on every device in hell.” I crossed my arms, smiling. It was really amusing to see Lucifer step in with his slip up of phrasing. Alastor also put on a good show by standing against Adam. I never expected him to actually take on such a powerful Heaven icon.

“Yeah, well, we need help with reinforcement in case the angels decide to retaliate.” She nervously fidgeted with her fingers, Lucifer watching me with anticipation. They all were, really. I was honored they considered me for help against heaven. Pretending to be debating it, I took long strides between Lucifer and Alastor.

“With all things considered, that’s a lot of my members being potentially killed for you. What do you have to offer me to make it worthwhile?” My hand started to glow pink, flexing my fingers and watching Charlie. Lucifer couldn’t make a deal with me or that’ll make more problems, only leaving Charlie and Alastor. Not like Luci would ever make the trust between us obvious. It would be a poor move if he wants to keep his weaknesses unknown. Alastor would rather drop dead than to be on a leash of someone else, though I have a sneaky suspicion it’s because he’s already on a leash. I should ask him about it next time we have one of our talks. Also, I already knew what they were going to sell to me but I can’t just make an assumption with it.

“We will make sure Angel Dust gets redeemed.” My eyes light up pink, turning around to look at Alastor. He held his hand out casually, opposite of how Charlie held hers against her chest. What a bland, and predictable, deal offer.

“Alastor, baby, I already knew that. We both knew that.” I winked at him. “So, what else?” His smile strained, despite it appearing to become more entertained. I read him like a book. It wasn’t very hard since he loves to hide behind a smile, saying it made things more intimidating. I’d like to think it’s more so the idea of being able to bottle those emotions he loves to hide.

“What else? Darling, I think it’s more than reasonable for that to be a big deal.” He smiled his sharp teeth, my eyes watched them carefully. A sneaky feeling crawling up my spine as my eyes stuck like a magnet to him. That’s when Lucifer pushed Alastor’s arm down, rolling his sleeves up, walking towards me. He stuck his hand outstretched towards me, trying to intimidate me with a hard stare. I just smiled in response, awaiting for his deal. I guess they really are desperate if Luci won’t even let Alastor and I pretend to hash out this deal. It was already mutually understood what he was going to offer was more than just that. He was just toying with the rest.

“We will get your brother into heaven, and you.” My smile froze on my face. I couldn’t get into Heaven. No matter how hard any of us tries, I’ll always be stuck here in hell. That fate was sealed long ago. My hands have been permanently stained red and black from how many lives I selfishly took after the death of my two siblings. My hands crossed tightly behind my back as I pondered harder over what he was promising.

I don’t think I want to go to Heaven. I couldn’t place why but something small was trying to tug me to decide to stay in hell.

Something small. The idea of being in heaven with my two younger siblings was bigger. Hell, maybe even the forgotten sibling will be there too.

“Can you even make deals, Luci?” I purred out the nickname in a taunting manner, giving a small moment of silence between us. Since he wanted to air out dirty laundry, I’ll give more hints to how close we actually are. But, he definitely didn’t think he could make a deal either. Charlie tried reasoning with him while Alastor watched from the sidelines, an odd look in his eyes. They flickered to Lucifer before narrowing with displeasure. I guess someone doesn’t like sharing friends.

“I guess we will see, won’t we La Morte.” He was struggling to remain professional. Neither of us wanted to act like this. This was all just a show for our professional standpoints, but I hated it. I’ve had to act professional and put together all my life, no matter how hard I fought against my father to create a life for myself and my siblings who wanted out. That’s all any of us wanted. Lucifer was a good guy despite the title he carries. His daughter is also an amazing girl. I would have agreed to do this either way. But, too many eyes were watching in this moment, too many windows and vulnerability to be spotted for our soft realities of each other. My hand gripped his as pink and gold clashed together.

“You got a deal, Satan.” My smile turned poisonous as I gripped his hand. My magic branded his palm with a pink heart, healing itself just as quickly into a scar. I felt the searing pain of a tally mark etch into my back, ignoring the feeling and refusing to let it slip out that it even happened.

“Anyways, enough with the professional talk. If we are going to be a team, call me by my name. I’m (Y/n).” Whether they could tell or not, my smile was genuine when I reached to shake hands with Charlie, Lucifer still rubbing his hand where the heart was branded onto him. Alastor watched heavily, something else pulling the weight of his stare on me. There’s no way he knows about the reciprocating brand mark. What can he notice that I don’t have hidden?

“Your name is really beautiful! I’m glad I don’t have to call you Death every time I refer to you now.” Charlie smiled genuinely back. Trying his best to make it sound like he has never called me by my name before. My eyes raked over his figure, understanding it’s a secret he wants to keep.

“Well of course, any friend of Anth- I mean Angel Dust, is a friend of mine.” The sibling sense kicked in before I even had to turn around. Anthony just rolled his eyes at me. Quick movements led to my shoe being thrown at Anthony’s head, smacking him hard enough in the face to send him backwards.

“Che cazzo!” (What the fuck!) My head snapped 180 with my body facing Charlie still. Through a clenched jaw and wide wild eyes, I lectured Anthony under my breath.

“Schialla, stronzo.” (Chill out, Asshole.) He immediately stopped, slouching against the wall. Anthony muttered under his breath but at least it wasn’t as disrespectful and obvious. Husk found it amusing enough to stifle a laugh with Vaggie.

“So, what’s the war plans?” I beamed, excited to get murderous for a good cause. Those exorcists killed a lot of my people, pissing off my whole team and myself tremendously. That was our family they were murdering brutally, just so they could have their sick fun and somehow remain in the sky. That was something Charlie and I could get along with.

“About that…” Lucifer awkwardly smiled. You’ve got to be joking. They have nothing? My eyes glanced at Alastor, who was still staring at me. I narrowed my eyes on him, silently asking “you serious right now?” to which he looked amused and shrugged. Bastardo, it’s your skin also being risked here.

“Okay, what do I have to work with here?” Charlie reappeared with a stack of papers and dropped them into my hands. I blinked a couple times, gazing through the words scribbled on the papers. These were lousy attempts at battle plans or any sort of war plans.

“I’ll revise these and have them back to you soon. I do request to have somewhere nearby for me to stay, along with my members. Fifteen minutes away isn’t a good distance, doll.” Observing Charlie’s timid behavior. Lucifer peered behind his daughter, gauging my reaction to everything. I had my work cut out for me but any excuse to be involved in Anthony’s life again was something I was willing to risk everything for.

“Consider it done. Let’s take a stroll so I can show you where it’s at.” Lucifer snapped his fingers and excitedly held his arm out for me to take to walk with him. He was always trying his best to put on a front, but I know he’s still struggling. I mean we still meet and talk about ways for him to mend the broken relationship with Charlie. But, it feels like another negative energy was coming from where my other ally stood. When I turned to Alastor, his eyes were still locked onto my figure, wide and slightly terrifying. The look alone ran a chill down my spine. Why did it feel more exciting than terrifying?

“You coming?” Lucifer glanced backwards towards me, forcing me to peel my eyes away from the enticing ruby set still locked on me. Instead, my eyes met the pale yellow and glowing red set. The tension felt high, pushing me to leave immediately.

“Yeah, of course. Just taking the place in since I’ll be staying here, and potentially dying here.” I laughed sadistically as Lucifer frowned and elbowed me.

“Not funny. There is no way myself, or any of us, will let something happen to you. Unless you get redeemed, too.” He winked trying to sell the confidence he could get me into heaven with my brother. I doubt it, but no harm in trying.

Following down the hall, around back, there was a warehouse building directly behind it. It mirrored the looks of my warehouses that have been distributed in my territories. I could easily move a little over half of my people within this building, comfortably. The smile slowly dragged across my face before I could stop it. Lucifer was smiling back at me, satisfied.

“Che bello…” (How beautiful…) My whole body relaxed, feeling almost unnatural. I didn’t know how to handle how I was feeling at all. All this weight that’s been pushing down on my shoulders just lifted enough for me to breathe, to relax. No one has ever done something this tremendous for me. I could feel tears brimming my eyes, ripping me out of that relaxed feeling. Instead, it was replaced with a sense of dread and need to feel that relaxed again. Lucifer was smiling softly, hand snaked around my waist as he waited.

“You want to go see the inside, (Y/n).” A small smile remained as I allowed his arm to remain, feeling natural and familiar, but so wrong.

“We can’t keep doing this, Angel. We both know that!” Lucifer was having one of his episodes again. The thoughts of Lilith coming back any second, just to see him fucking some other girl and actually leave him type of thoughts. Not that I could ever understand what he’s going through and show sympathy, but rather I’m getting tired of fixing what I didn’t break.

“Listen, Luci, I know.” He stopped. In the poorly lit room, I could see his eyes glowing and a faint outline of his body shape standing on the opposite side of the bed. He knows what’s coming.

“What do you mean?” His eyes pierced mine. A hard stare swimming with all sorts of emotions. Panic was in the center of the tornado.

“Luci, we can’t keep having the same conversation every other day.” I sighed as he remained frozen in fear. One wrong move and I can destroy everything.

“I know you still love her. Nothing could ever change that. You have spent all of eternity together, created a beautiful daughter, ruled over hell. It’s not something you can just fix in seven years, and I never expected you to.” His eye twitched as his black hands started to curl in, making fists. I watched carefully how his breathing was now heavier. I didn’t want to make a bigger mess but I can’t mindlessly try and heal him again, no matter how badly I wanted to.

“What I did expect was some sort of progress to prove that you were learning to let go and love me.” It felt selfish how I was wording it, but my own abandonment issues were strangling me. It hurt to breathe and my vision was blurring. He huffed out, about to deny everything I’m saying.

“I know you love me, but not as much as Lilith.” My eyes froze on Lucifer in panic. Merda. (Shit.) I said her name.

“Don’t you ever say her name. Especially not like that. If she loved me, she wouldn’t have disappeared, abandoned me or Charlie. You don’t know anything.” I knew he didn’t mean it at the moment but my mom taught me one thing, never let a man tell you twice he doesn’t want you.

“It’s over, Lucifer.” I moved slowly to the door, refusing to turn my back to him and his eerie glowing eyes in the dark room, shutting the door quietly and carefully behind me.

During my walk back, it felt like a walk of shame. Opening and closing my door as quietly as possible to my office, sliding my back down the door. There is where I sobbed for hours, grieving a relationship where I actually felt loved, relaxed, and free from the impact my father has held on me all my life. This is where I vowed to never allow myself to get emotionally attached again.

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(As always, the characters belong to their owner and the story belongs to me. If you have any requests or ideas, send them over! I love to hear feedback! I will also gladly try to write things for my supporters! I have put a LOT of research and planning into this series! I also researched Italian to try and make it as real as possible! Thank you for the love and I hope y’all have a great day! <3 :)!)

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Tag List:

@pooka167 @serenity-songbird @readergirlstuff @nishayuro @lovingyeet @genderlessdude92 @slytherin4ever @random-3455 @mo-0-o @lucifers-silhouette @sadnessiscoldtea @idonthaveanameforthisacc @marxo5 @emonerdwinchester @macehysteria @tsukiko26

Tagged who I could, some it wouldn’t allow :(

[unhetalia]

England headcanons (pt. 1):

Chain-smokes like a motherfucker. Alfred, who doesn't smoke and pretends very hard to think smoking is disgusting, hasn't yet realised where his secret smoking kink comes from.

Currently works for British Intelligence/has infiltrated his own government.

Carries around either a cane or umbrella that hides a sword even though he has never ONCE had to use it. He just feels more comfortable having a sword. (He does also carry around a gun, which, in contrast, has been used often.)

Also carries around his own pen, and absolutely loathes the thought of using someone else's. The pen is a first edition Michel Perchin Serpent in Champagne LE Fountain Pen given to him by Alfred - only ten were ever made and it cost a cool 8k. While Arthur has more valuable things - especially from his time as a pirate and back when he personally knew his royal family - the pen is still one of his most prized possessions.

His favourite tea is actually French Earl Grey - which is Earl Grey with rose petals. Not actually French? But Arthur's still pretty annoyed about it.

As mentioned in a few of my other posts - Arthur is incredibly physical and has kept up with sword fighting and various martial arts over the years, and regularly goes to the gym. He's very disciplined about it.

Tends to eat only for fuel as opposed to enjoyment whenever he's left to his own devices.

If pressed, Arthur will admit his best friend is Francis. Francis would say the same about Arthur.

(Despite their individual body counts, Francis and Arthur have never slept with each other.)

(Arthur doesn't have a lot of friends and has a strained relationship with his siblings, and has always felt that people don't like spending time with him. Even when he was on top of the world, working with his government to become an Empire, he still felt like an underdog.)

On that note, Arthur worked with his government longer than the other Nations, and was a huge part of establishing the British Empire. It made his already fraught relationship with his siblings even worse, and he regrets a lot of it.

Nations get scars very rarely, because very few things have the ability to give them scars - magical weapons is one of those things. Out of all the Nations, England has the most scars.

England is amazing at knitting and crochet, and he gifts Francis crocheted figurines from French cartoons for his birthday every year, which Francis adores. He also knits Canada scarves and gloves and beanies whenever he remembers him.

One of Arthur's most embarrassing memories is getting gonorrhea during his pirate days. He didn't have sex for a month after his healing kicked in - a record back then - and he became a lot more diligent in procuring and using the linen sheaths they used as condoms at the time.

Three of Arthur's back molars are implants made of real gold.

Alfred is the first (and last) person Arthur will say he's ever fallen in love with BUT the closest he's come is with another American - a nurse that took care of him during World War I. She was blonde and blue eyed and once shouted Arthur down when he insisted on continuing to fight even with a bullet lodged in his shoulder. She completely disappeared in April 1917, just before the Americans officially joined the war. He sometimes wonders what happened to her.

[kieranxvalentine]

Shine. [M. O'hara]

༻♡༺✎ Your world was usually bleak and grey, series of black and white. Color was a luxury didn’t get to experience. Your friends had long since found their soulmates and tended to rub in in your face. But after being saved by your friendly neighborhood Spiderman, you realized why you had never seen your soulmate. He was Spiderman. ༻♡༺✎ Miguel O’hara x Reader. ༻♡༺✎ PG! Soulmate Au ༻♡༺✎ 1.1k words ༻♡༺✎  I love soulmate au's so expect more from me- If you want to support me! Here's my link!

“Don’t worry Y/n!” “I’m pretty sure you will find your soulmate soon!” “You’ll find them eventually!.”

Each and everyone that you have ever met have always told you the same thing. 

That your time was coming and that it was going to be your time to meet your soulmate.

That they were out there, they were on the way.

But here’s the thing, they all have their soulmate already.

When you went out with your friends, you were jealous. They were all able to see the bright colorful lights of Nueva York at night. The got to see the rainbows and various colors in between, and not have to be stuck to seeing the world in dull greys, blacks and whites. 

Tonight was another one of those nights.

Your friends Melody and Isabelle decided to invite you out to go to a festival being held in downtown Nueva York. 

You tried to be happy about the event but your friends kept taking cheap shots at you.

“Oh my god! Y/n! Did you see the fireworks?” “She can’t see colors stupid. She doesn’t have her soulmate.” “Oh! You still haven't found him?”

You sighed as you looked up to the sky, seeing fireworks explode in the sky, but to you they just looked like white lights against a black sky. You could tell that there were different colors due to the varying greys and white but other than that. You couldn’t see much.

"Ahh.. You'll find 'em one day Y/n." "Hey, I heard you can get artificial glasses to see colors if you never do- OW!" "Aya! That's not nice!"

You felt tears were welling up in her eyes as her friends continually cheers and talk about the exciting decorations, lights and everything else.

“Oh my god look!”

Your eyes looked over to the Alchemax building and your eyes light up, Whenever this festival happened it was normal for their Spiderman to arrive and watch from afar, From what you knew from your friends and family, he wore a red and blue suit, that seemed cybernetic, his webs were a neon red.

You wished you could understand the concept of colors. You wished that you could experience that true feeling of excitement everyone describes when you meet your soulmate.

It's often described as a burst of emotions, a warm feeling that rivals being snuggled up in your favorite blanket during a cold day.

You hated that you were constantly left out of the loop when it came to things, and that your friends weren’t really helpful for what-

“LOOK OUT!”

A scream left your body as you were tackled as an explosion happened close by, You braced for impact, expecting your back to hit the rough ground but you felt someone’s large hands cradling you in their arms.

You opened your eyes and felt an intense pain shoot through your head, and you were knocked back onto your feet.

You groaned in pain as the person holding you helped you up to your feet. You finally opened your eyes and your breath caught in your throat.

You were rescued by Spiderman, but that wasn’t what caused your silence, you could see the colors of his suit, the way the red and blue merged together to make the spider symbol on his chest, the way the grey device he wore on his wrist lit up with orange colors. 

It seems like it affected him too, he took a step back before placing a hand on his head, you gasped as you watched him pull his mask off.

He had beautiful short brown locs and tanned skin, brown eyes with hints of red shades in them. He was handsome…very handsome.

You were silent for a while until he finally spoke up.

“So I guess you’re my soulmate, Huh?”

He raised a hand to caress your cheek, cradling your body back close to him, as if he was analyzing all the colors you had on, admiring the beauty of your skin, eyes and hair.

"Después de tanto tiempo, finalmente te encontré."

His voice was wonderful, it was like velvet to your ears. You nodded slightly, not understanding what he said. He chuckled at this before he slid his mask back on. He finally pulls away from you..

“Head home, pretty sure the festival is going to be over, I’ll meet you there.”

He quickly shot a web to join what you assumed was other spider people, leaving you in shock. 

Your friends quickly found you and they rushed to your side. “Y/n!? Oh my god are you okay?”

“What the hell happened? Why do you look like that?!” Melody yelled as she shook you.

“I..I think i just met my soulmate…” You mumbled out as your friends looked at each other before looking back at you.

“Huh?!”

“During the chaos?! Well who is he?”

“H..he’s…Spiderman..”

…

“HE’S WHO?!” “HE’S WHAT?!”

"Mama! I'm serious! I met my soulmate and he's spiderman!"

"Aye...I'm finding it hard to believe honey.

You were currently in your home, an apartment that was on the third floor of your building. You were cooking yourself something while on the phone with your mother. She had called to check on you after your friends had told her about the festival and what happened there.

“Are you sure you weren’t just seeing things, Honey?..”

“Mom! I know what spiderman looks like! We only have one in our city!!” You whined as your mother chuckled over the phone. She believed you…well partially.

She was just happy that you could see colors like everyone else.

You were about to ramble on again before you heard a tapping on your window.

You walked over with the phone, only to see your friendly neighborhood spiderman his mask off and he was waiting outside your window.

“Mom..I’ll call you back later..”

You hung up the phone on your mother (which you would probably get an ear full for it later.), and rushed to the window, opening it, allowing him in.

He climbed in through your window with a gentle smile on his face, this man was huge, around 6’9, which dwarfed your form. He placed his hands on either side of your shoulders as he looked down at you.

“I believe we need to get properly acquainted.” He says and you blush as you averted your gaze, only to have him bring your gaze back to his with a hand on your chin. You felt your heart nearly leap out of your throat. Butterflies were dancing in your stomach as he looked down at you with a playful smirk.

“I’m Miguel, Miguel O’hara.”

“Y/n…Y/n L/n..” You responded as he continued to hold you close as if he were to let go you were going to vaporize right before his eyes. He raises a hand to touch your (h/c) hair, as if admiring the color before locking his eyes with your (e/c) ones. It felt weird to finally see color, but the fuzzy feeling in your chest quickly quelled that feeling.

“U-um?..W-would you like to stay for dinner?..” You managed to stutter out as he finally let you go. He nods as he follows behind you as you guide him into the kitchen.

You felt comfortable in his presence, one because he was your city’s superhero, two, because he was your soulmate. Your eyes exploded with color when you locked eyes with him. 

That meant you did have a soulmate, you weren’t going to be alone forever in a dull, colorless world.

Miguel was a gentleman, he was polite and seemed to be perfect for you, besides him being, you know Spiderman. You found yourself talking with him until you ended up getting sleepy.

He led you back to your bed and helped you get tucked in before placing a kiss on your forehead, and leaving the same way he came in, out the window. 

When he was gone, you heard a buzz from your phone and turned to look at your phone.

‘My Soulmate <3: Looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you..’

You felt your heart swell as you turned back over preparing to head to bed, he had put his number in before leaving. You felt so giddy.

You had your soulmate, and He was also your hero.

©kieranxvaletine 2023 <3 Hope you all enjoyed!

[sunflower-author]

Hello 😁🤚🏻

I hope you are in good health and have a full spirit 💖

I'm having trouble getting in a writing mood and reading others story always make me happy. I've never really sent request before so this would be my frist, I hope it's not much trouble, and if you can't find inspiration for it, I'll understand if you can't or don't want to do it.

I was hoping you could write a yandere assassination classroom, the entire class of 3-E or just a few like Karma, Nagisa, Itona (anyone really) with a reader that couldn't care less about their yandere nature, and someone blurts out (do to feeling guilty) that they have been stalking them home and had taking some of their stuff (the class thinking reader will get mad) but reader just shrugged and say they already knew and that they need to work on their stalking because she figured them out on day 2. Gender doesn't matter, but if you do gender fluid that be nice if not anything else is good.

If you don't wish to write it, please say no◇

Please have a good day/night. ♡

SO SORRY!! This took much longer than I anticipated for!!

I really hope you like it!! If not please lmk on things I can fix!!!

Also, somehow this was a bit rushed too sorry!

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"Hey Ritsu, are you connected?" Tomohito asks, sitting down at a desk beside her.

"Yes, the girls put the cameras in, there are no blind spots," Ritsu answers.

"Wait, no blind spots? Wouldn't that be... I don't know..." Kaede says worried.

"The cameras are only in their living room, we didn't put any cameras in anything else if that was what you were thinking," Tomohito says reassuring Kaede.

"Well we did put some listening devices, in some of the plushies we gave them, isn't that right? Itona?" Rio asks, putting an arm around him. 

"Making them was a bit tricky, but it was a lot easier to make than the cameras," Itona says, playing with his remote car.

"You guys are seriously trying too hard," Karma says, in a mocking tone having his dumb smirk, plastered on his face.

"Really now? and what do you suggest we do differently?" Ryoma asks, clearly annoyed.

"You all a bunch of babies, if you really loved Y/N you'll skip this boring stalking thing, and just take things into your own hands," Karma says, with a statistic smile.

"If we were to do that Y/N would hate us forever," Nagisa counters back.

"Really?, Because I think that if we keep them long enough, they will eventually fall for us, I mean humans are social creatures, needing contact in order to survive, with us being their only contact they will eventually fall for us, right?" Karma says explaining.

"Even if that were to happen, if we keep them isolated they might break, losing themselves then loving us, I don't want that to happen," Nagisa says seriously, looking up at Karma.

"A small price that might be paid," Karma says, shrugging "But if it were just me, they wouldn't break, but now that I am sharing the chances would be higher," he says as if the class were all just a nuisance.

"Guys! Shut Up! Y/N just walked into the building!" Hinata says, panting a bit as she just ran into the room.

With that, the room goes silent...

Until...

"Takuya I'm sorry, but I'm busy after school today how about tomorrow?" you say walking in the room. All eyes are on you, ".....Um.. Hey guys?" you say unsurely. 

The tension in the room faded, and they all started talking like nothing happened. It was a bit scary how the mood can change like a flip of a switch. 

"Hey Y/N! What were you talking about with Takuya?" Manami asks, in her usual timid voice.

"Oh just if I was able to hand out at the ramen place later on today, but I'm hanging out with Rinka and Ryunosuke later," you say casually.

"Heh, sorry Takuya but there are already three of us, maybe next time we'll invite you," Rinka says teasingly.

"Hey Y/N,  do you wanna come with me to the teacher's lounge? Korosensei just came back from Germany yesterday," Kaede asks, popping her head out the door. "Sounds fun and good, I'm in," you say excitedly, as you head out the door.

Takuya waits for your footsteps to become gone before saying "You just want more pictures of Y/N that's the only reason you and Ryunosuke, are taking them out," clearly annoyed.

"Oh whatever, you always like looking at the pictures in the end, just like everyone else," Ryunosuke says rolling his eyes.

"I.. just make sure they're good," Takuya says embarrassed.

"Your talking to the best snippers in class 3-E, we always have good visuals on our target," Rinka says, hearing the pride in her voice.

"I thought you guys said that Rinka and Ryunosuke stopped taking pictures of Y/N?" Manami asks worried.

"I... well... it's complicated," Hiroto says, trying to explain it to her, as he was the one who told Manami that they stopped taking pictures of Y/N.

"He obviously lied to you," Karma says blankly. "Your too empathic, we needed you to stop worrying over Y/N, knowing that you would break, telling them everything... well ruining everything for all of us," Karma says explaining.

"I admit that I'm not the best actor, but you guys didn't have to lie about Y/N, I care about them, just as much as any of you guys, I even made the drugs you asked for," Manami says, as he holds up a bag of different bottles.

"Wait... what drugs?" Nagisa asks, confused and curious.

"You know the the drugs, I made my own chloroform, something that calms the mind, something that weakens muscles, and lastly something that can make them sleepy," Manami says explaining.

"We didn't... Karma!" Nagisa says, angry by the thought Karma would do such a thing.

"So what if I was, I promise I won't do it alright, especially now that you know," Karma says as he puts his hands up.

"Hey guys! We're back," Kaede says, walking through the door. Signaling to everyone that you are nearby, it became a habit sometimes when they talk they become so engaged in the conversation, that they lose track of anything else, including your presence.

"Ah Y/N, just the person I wanted to see," Karma says, with a sweet smile. You know something is up when he smiles like that, just when does he normally smile sweetly?

"Karma... what do you want?" You ask hesitantly, staying cautious. 

"You know, we barely spend time with each other, most of the time you just hang out with everyone else... it seems like your avoiding me," he says hurt, clearly acting.

"Karma you know that's not true, everyone just makes plans with me every single second of the day, you know this, so what's your point?" you ask, wondering what he is trying to say.

"It's just that...don't you think it's a bit odd... that every day you have someone that wants to hang out with you, it's a bit abnormal behavior? Ever noticed how everyone treats you slightly differently? Or the fact that they know small details about you, that you've never shared before? Do you wonder why is that?" Karma says still smiling, but with a mischievous face.

"Karma..." Nagisa says, with a dark look, warning Karma.

"You messed up my plan, I'm just returning the favor," Karma says looking at Nagisa, then turns to you.

"Well, don't you?" Karma says in a smug tone.

"... I wonder why, on my first day of school, Rinka and Ryunosuke were following me home, I wonder why Kotaro somehow knows when I'm going to mess up on things, I wonder why Nagisa has a whole notebook dedicated to me, and lastly I wonder why you act so innocent when you are the worst one out of everyone, do seriously think I don't know that you hurt people that I talk to that is not in this class? And a whole lot more things of you and the rest of the class," You say, calm and collected.

"You knew this whole time?..." Nagisa asks with wide eyes.

"Anyone would have been able to see and know what you all were planning," You say turning to look back at him. (Any normal person would be oblivious to it all)

"Heh, I knew I couldn't fall in love with just any normal person, turns out you truly are unique," Karma says proud that you were conscious of what they were doing.

[jimmys-zeppelin]

moonbeam

ch. vii

table of contents

may 26, 1998

What was Jimmy buying?

The question plagued Sabrina for far longer than she wanted it to. It was stupid, really, but she couldn’t shake the thought from her mind. The egg on her frying pan sizzled as she thought on Jimmy’s buying habits. The white began to brown at the edges and the smell snapped Sabrina from her daze. 

It was already noon and there would barely be enough time to eat her still-cooking egg before she’d have to leave. Then again, she wasn’t worried about coming in late. It wasn’t like she’d be reprimanded for her tardiness. Taking five extra minutes wouldn’t put her job in jeopardy. 

“I’ll just have to hire you to take care of my clothing mishaps, then,” Jimmy’s voice echoed in her mind from earlier that morning.

“Stupid,” she chuckled quietly, taking the frying pan off the fire and shaking it onto the waiting plate beside the stove. She hadn’t bothered to sit at the table because if she got too comfortable, she knew she wouldn’t get up. So she leaned over the counter, her Coca-Cola fizzing quietly in front of her. Distantly, she heard a buzz. 

Her phone was ringing. 

"Ugh, not the time," Sabrina mumbled as she shoveled most of the egg into her mouth and crossed into the living room where her purse lay on the sofa. 

She could feel the buzz and heard her unmistakable ringtone of The Spice Girls' "Never Give Up On The Good Times" and she anxiously hummed along as she shuffled through her bag. 

Finally, her fingers gripped the tiny black Nokia device. "What the—"

Jimmy Page — mobile 

ANSWER | DECLINE

Without a second thought, Sabrina clicked to answer the call, choosing to ignore the indiscernible sinking feeling in her chest that came with seeing his name on her screen. 

“Hello?” she answered with a start. Perhaps she was too quick.

“Sabrina, hi. Erm, hello," he sounded as if he were correcting himself. 

“Hi, Jimmy,” Sabrina said, going back to her egg and Coke. "Another fashion emergency?" she teased. 

There was a short pause, then he laughed. The bubbly laugh that hit her ears forced a smile onto her face and a flutter in her heart. She didn't want to feel this way about him, but she couldn't help it. He was so much older and there was no way in hell she'd be ready to get into anything else with someone else so soon. Despite Shaun’s having obviously moved on with Sarah. 

But the way Jimmy drew her in made Sabrina feel like a dazed cartoon character being led blindly by an enticing piece of meat. She wanted him. And she knew he shamelessly flirted with her. She loved it more than she cared to admit.

"No, no, I just, uh," he paused, trying to find the words, "Well, I felt bad that our conversation was interrupted earlier at Boots this morning." 

"Oh!" Sabrina took a sip of her soda. She grabbed the half-empty can and put it back into the refrigerator for later. Her egg was a leftover piece of whites—arguably the most boring part of the egg. She tossed the rest of it as she thought up a response. "Well, I'm about to head out to work, but I have a few minutes to chat." As many minutes as you need, Jimmy....

"Have I got you at a bad time?"

"Not at all. I'm the only one who's keeping the alterations business going. It's nothing too serious if I'm late," Sabrina shrugged on a windbreaker. It began to drizzle when she'd come back from Boots and she was sure the weather had gotten worse in the meantime. "Hey, you weren't serious about paying me triple for my job, were you?"

"If you want to work for me I can guarantee it'd probably be better. You'd only have to put up with me," Jimmy chuckled, "Plus you'll get to travel with me....and other benefits." 

The tone of benefits made Sabrina’s heart beat just that much faster. If there was one thing Jimmy did well, it was his ability to talk to women. 

"Benefits?" she questioned, an allure to her voice. 

"Yes, well," he chuckled again and sighed, "I know you don't have time to talk now. Next time I see you I'll bring out the contract." 

"Oh, God," Sabrina laughed, stuffing her keys into her pocket. She'd begun to grab the last few items she needed before leaving her apartment. "Your other suits are ready, by the way." Changing the subject was the only way she could slip out of the confrontation of admitting anything to Jimmy that she’d regret later.

"Ah, yes, I nearly forgot....I'll come by to get them. Maybe tomorrow. Unless you do house calls and can drop them off for me,” Jimmy said, hopeful. 

"Well, I'm not your assistant, Jimmy,” Sabrina retorted with a chuckle, tugging the building door closed and ensuring it was locked. She yanked her hood over her head as the rain began to dot her cheeks.

"Doesn't hurt to ask," he replied. She knew he was smiling. "What time do you get off work? If that's not a strange question to ask." 

It was certainly a question to ask. Strange? She couldn't tell. 

"Store closes at eight. Whenever we finish the closing duties I'll be out," she said, taking her tube card out from her back pocket in preparation to tap it at the turnstile. She stood to the side, though, for fear that if she tapped in, she'd lose any and all phone signal. "Are you planning on ambushing me?" 

"Perhaps...." Jimmy teased. "Just curious, really."

"Hey listen, I have to go, but if you want to talk more you can call the store and help me pass the time by pretending you’re putting in another order or something.”

"It's alright, I'll let Clarence's have their best employee for another day. I have some things I've been putting off myself." 

"Alright. Well, let's talk soon, hm?" Sabrina said, picking at the bit of loose skin at the edge of her nail. For the second time that day he was nearly sending her into cardiac arrest. If they didn't get off the phone soon, she'd quit her job and run to work for Jimmy Page at his (probably) big, fancy house. 

"Absolutely, Sab. Be safe out there, love." 

Her stomach did about four somersaults. 

"Thanks, Jimmy...bye." 

"Bye." 

He didn't hang up, and Sabrina watched the time duration continue on to 5:10, 5:11, 5:12 until she hung up. Sabrina had never felt this way for someone she had known for so little time. And someone famous, no less. She was terrified. 

☽ 

The late May rain poured down outside. Humidity fogged up Clarence's thin, glass door, the logo decal barely visible from where she stood inside. 

It was 8:15 in the evening. Sabrina felt grungy and gross. She needed a shower more than anything and knew her hair was in need of a wash. She had the next day's opening shift in twelve hours, but she knew already that she wouldn't be getting nearly enough sleep to power her through to the next day. 

Most of Clarence's staff had gone home for the day, citing the rain as their main reason for heading out early, but Sabrina and a few other stragglers remained. 

Luckily, Conner had worked the morning shift that day. After he'd left her place, he'd taken the train right to work and said he'd head home afterwards. Sabrina knew she wouldn't see him when she came in, and she was beyond thankful. She hadn't been ready to face him quite yet after the events of the previous night had transpired. 

They kissed, they touched, and when they were nearly headed to their final destination, a rotten feeling in Sabrina's gut had taken root. Conner was more than understanding and Sabrina was terribly embarrassed, but they both went to bed on good terms. Things would sort themselves out between them, but Sabrina wanted to avoid Conner for as long as she could until then. 

Sabrina yanked the vacuum cord to a more clear path. Thinking on all this, she realized she had been clenching her jaw. Grinding her teeth wasn't new, but her subconscious did it without her mind taking notice. She needed to schedule with the dentist. 

As she finished up the area she'd been working on, the bell over the door jingled, the hefty winds and white noise from the rain became louder. 

"Sorry, we're closed! Come back tomorrow, please," Sabrina called out, beginning to follow the cord to the vacuum when a soaked pair of loafers came into her view. Jimmy's.

"I'm sorry, I just—" he was out of breath, like he'd been running, "I needed to come see you." 

"What?" was her automated response. His perfect curls were flat against his forehead. His cigarette-tinged cologne mixed with rainwater. Rain drops rolled off his soft leather jacket and dripped onto the carpet with muffled thuds. Sabrina could hear her own breaths. The texture of the vacuum cord suddenly became obvious to her fingertips. 

"Sabrina, I know it's a horrible time, I'm soaked, I'm a mess, the store's closed, but I," Jimmy could hardly get the words out. Sabrina knew what he was going to say. She was so starstruck she almost didn't want to hear him say it. "I haven't stopped thinking about you since the day we met." 

"Jimmy—" Me, too. 

"Let me take you to dinner. Friday at seven. I'll pick you up. We'll go someplace nice." 

Sabrina stood stunned. No words left her, her jaw hung ajar, her eyes searching his for any sign of a lie. 

"If you say no I—"

"No, yes. Yes. Let's. I—" she stopped herself. The nerves were starting to hit. "Me?" she asked. 

"There's no one else here, Sab. You're...I barely know you but I haven't felt like this about anyone in a long, long time. One date. That's all I ask."

"I don't even know how old you are..." Sabrina chuckled. 

Jimmy's gut jumped with his laugh. Sabrina felt her insides melt a little at the sight. "I'm fifty-four. If it's too much, I think I'll die." 

"Twice my age," Sabrina said, a smile playing at the edge of her lips. Mum's gonna hate this, she thought to herself. 

"Twenty-seven," Jimmy said. Sabrina nodded. "Alright." 

"Alright?" Sabrina said. 

"Yeah...." he took a breath, letting himself take a look around the tiny store. "Now that I'm here," he started. 

"I'll go get your suits," Sabrina smiled. She locked the vacuum into a standing position and dropped the power cord to the floor. Their eyes met briefly, but the look he gave her was different that time. Just as she passed him, Jimmy took hold of her hand, a slight tug held her back. 

“Don’t be long…” Jimmy trailed off. The start of a cheeky smile played on the edges of his lips. When their eyes met, his lips grazed her middle finger just above her knuckle. A rush of excitement coursed through her. 

“Don’t worry,” Sabrina replied, her voice so soft it was nearly a whisper. 

Once sequestered in the fitting area upstairs, Sabrina tried her best not to jump and squeal out loud like a teenage girl, but with varied success. She couldn't help the unmoving smile on her face and hoped Jimmy would stay downstairs until she could better contain her feelings. The soft footsteps behind her proved her wrong. 

Jimmy couldn't help but smile either.

"Excuse me, sir, this area is for employees only," Sabrina said. 

“I couldn’t stay away,” Jimmy replied dryly, a chuckle on the horizon.

“Yeah, yeah, I bet,” Sabrina chided, zipping up the suit bags after ensuring both were Jimmy's.

She didn’t know what it was, but Jimmy felt right. She didn't want to take this for granted. Not one bit. 

There was a pause, then he spoke. “How are you getting home?" Jimmy asked, his fingers tracing down the length of her arm until he reached her fingertips. He toyed with them in his hand. Sabrina wished he'd take and kiss each one of her fingers. 

"It's alright, Jimmy, I was going to just tube it," she shrugged. 

"Nonsense," he said softly. "I'll give you a lift home. It’s pouring rain out there.”

She didn't want to fight. Plus, the more time she could spend with him, the better. 

"Fine," she conceded. "I just have to finish up downstairs and we can go." 

☽ 

Sabrina knocked her knees together anxiously. The radio played softly in the dark interior of Jimmy’s car. He wasn’t driving, as she quickly learned that he’d had his own driver—Giuseppe—who took him all over whenever he pleased. Hell of a job that must be, Sabrina thought, Driving around Jimmy Page on his personal ventures.

Giuseppe was Italian, as she could infer from his heavy accent. They spoke briefly, Sabrina introducing herself upon entering the vehicle. Silence quickly followed. She could feel Jimmy watching her from where he sat at his opposing seat. 

The moment was officially awkward. 

“Where are you planning on taking me for our night out?” Sabrina asked, shadows of raindrops on the back windshield obscuring Jimmy's face. 

Jimmy smiled slightly, “Um, well, I’ll have to see for sure where I can get us in, but I’m thinking Italian food. I know someone who owns a nice restaurant in Central London." 

"I love Italian." 

She loved pasta. And meatballs. But genuine Italian food was something she wasn't quite familiar with. 

"It's nice, not too fancy. I wouldn't imagine you'd be thrilled with anything too extravagant." 

"Well, I enjoy some extravagance sometimes," Sabrina giggled, "But you're right. The more intimate, the better." 

Giuseppe made the turn onto her block. Sabrina almost didn't want to leave. What would they possibly talk about? She could just sit staring at him until the car ran out of petrol, nary a word being traded between them, but the thought of Giuseppe sitting there....waiting....would be much too awkward. 

"Yes, good," Jimmy said, reaching for Sabrina's hand where it rested on the seat close by. He kissed her ice cold knuckles again, and noticed how her hand trembled slightly. "You alright?"

"Perfect. I'm always cold. Also I may or may not have eaten since we spoke on the phone earlier. Just a bit hungry." 

And not to mention the absolute ride the last hour was for her. 

"Sabrina..." Jimmy trailed off with a laugh, like he wanted to lecture her, but knew it wouldn't get him anywhere. The car slowed to a stop outside Sabrina's building. Jimmy peered out at the brown brick apartment complex. "This it?"

"Yeah. It's quite shitty, honestly," she exhaled a laugh, looking over to the building along with Jimmy.  It was home to her. More of a home than her home for the previous three years had been. After university, Sabrina and Shaun had gotten a place in Chelsea. It was nice, yes, but Sabrina always felt a detachment to the place. The building was too modern, tenants rude, and near constant fucking or fighting occurring on the other side of opposing flat walls. 

Sabrina hadn't been near the building since moving out in January. It harbored horrible memories—especially towards the end of things. Staring down at the positive pregnancy test, rejecting Shaun's proposal of marriage on New Year's Day, the bump was only just beginning to peek through her form fitting dress...

She hadn't thought about those days in a long time. 

Jimmy squeezed her hand.

"Let me walk you to your door," he said gently. 

His face held a sincerity she realized that not many did. The words didn't come, so she nodded. 

The usually short walk from the sidewalk to her door felt like it lasted miles. Sabrina fumbled with her keys, the rain wetted the metal pieces and soon there was a dark shadow covering the yellow-white light over the old door. She looked up, seeing the interior of Jimmy’s worn leather coat over her head, protecting her from the rain. 

“Such a romantic,” she chuckled, finding the right key seconds later. 

“I didn’t have a chance to grab an umbrella on my way out."

"If you thought about me a little less, you may have remembered." 

"Maybe so," Jimmy sighed. Rain drops landed on his curls, the locks of hair rustling like leaves in the wind. Sabrina wondered if she should invite him upstairs; let him borrow an umbrella...give him an excuse to see her again, maybe kiss her this time. His lips pursed as she watched him. "What's that look for?" 

"Sorry," a shot of adrenaline ran through her, "Got a little lost in my thoughts."

"Lost in my eyes, yeah?" 

"Shut up," she nudged him with her foot. The door opened. If she looked up at him again, then the moment would end. She sighed. 

Jimmy's foot tapped hers, drawing her attention up to him. The glint in his eye made her heart's presence in her chest obvious to her ears. 

"I guess I should go..." Sabrina started.

"I'll see you on Friday night," he said, using his free hand to graze her cheek using the backs of his fingers. 

Sabrina hummed in agreement, "Now you have my address." 

"Right-o..."

She exhaled a laugh.

"Sabrina—" he started. 

She reached for him, her fingers light on his cheek to steady him as she drew him in. His lips were soft—softer than she'd expected them to be. The moment was quick, but definitive. 

Their eyes met long enough for Sabrina to see the smile creep up on Jimmy's face, then she hurried inside. There was a quiet "Bye," said through the rain falling around them as she started into the building. Jimmy lingered for a beat, a smile permanently etched onto his face. Then, he shrugged his leather jacket back over his shoulders and started back to the car. Upstairs, he saw the glow of a light switch on. 

-

masterlist | playlist

taglist: @knotnatural @jonesyjonesyjonesy @paginate54 @hejustsatisfiess @salixfragilis @rosyfingereddawnn @reincarnated70sbaby @starstofillmydream @kyunisixx @blackberryblossom @jimmypages @foreverandadaydarling @lzep @n0quart3r @verrbena-in-the-air @groovyysav @mystify1222 @maziecrazycloud if you want to be added to the list let me know!

[idontplaytrack]

Diamonds falling down

Amber Appleton x fem! reader

Warnings: angst, fluff, sickfic, age regression, a bit of baby talk(?)

"And I don't know what I'm supposed to do But if she feels bad, then I do, too So I let her be"

One day at a time. You’ve always heard this saying from people around you. If it wasn’t this, it was ‘you’re so strong’, ‘oh, my god. I could never do what you’re doing’ And frankly, you were a little sick of it. You’ve been sick your entire life, always in and out of the hospital— and in your teens, that’s when things lost control. You had a new diagnosis, and new chronic pain among other symptoms. It became draining because you were at an age where you were so aware of what was going on in your body. You were tired of fighting. Everyday felt like an uphill battle. It took you a long time to feel like yourself again following the diagnoses, and when Amber came into your life, you couldn’t help but fall in love with her. Even though it was so scary for you and you didn’t have the guts to even ask her out. She took notice of you, however, and was chatting with you almost all the time. Talking to her was when you’d felt seen and heard, a vast difference from how things have been like in your life since getting sick. When you told Amber about your demon of a chronic illness, you were confused because she didn’t run away. Instead, she asked you more— she wanted to know more. You couldn’t believe it, you couldn’t fathom that someone was actually that interested in you. Someone like you, who was so broken by life’s…challenges.

Amber in a way, gave you a sense of purpose. You looked forward to each new day because you knew she’d be there. You knew that she’d be there for you. Just like she’s been for the past year and a half. Yep, a year and a half— you couldn’t even believe it yourself.

Anyway today was one of those days were the demons have caused you to barely be able to move— let alone get out of bed. After breakfast, you were hit with a wave of searing pain in your lower left side that nearly had you falling to your knees. Clutching on the counter for support, you were crouched over, breathing through it until you didn’t feel the pain anymore. Well, it lingered but mostly died down. So you dragged yourself upstairs, hoping it doesn’t hit you again until you were at least in bed.

Yeah, fuck it. You weren’t going anywhere today. Your parents have already left for work long before you woke up, so…no one was going to stop you.

Cyst rupture - 1, you- 0.

Also…you were going to be running a little late already even if you went. So you weren’t gonna be having a good day anyway, considering how you had also had something else you didn’t tell Amber about.

Your phone started to buzz after awhile, it must be Amber texting you. You didn’t even have the capability to reach over and grab the device since every bit of movement right now worsens the pain. What you did was just to curl up in a fetal position and fall back asleep so you didn’t have to feel it.

Expectedly, you only drifted in and out of sleep which was quite restless. But when you woke up eventually, the pain was gone so you took the chance to go downstairs and grab your bottle of pain meds, water and some snacks. Just getting the essentials you needed to make it through the day. You ate a snack, drank a bit of water then quickly swallowed the pill, wanting it to take effect ASAP. You didn’t even know what time it was until you heard noise coming from the foyer, followed by rushed steps up the stairs. Amber literally burst into your room as you locked eyes with her. Her gaze softened immediately as she sat down next to you and leaned down to kiss you on the side of your head.

————

Living in Portland, the weather obviously got cold this time of year. So you were already feeling a flare up creeping up on you for the last few days, this pain from ovarian cyst rupture only sent you over the edge. “Sorry.” You muttered, “I couldn’t.”

“That’s okay. I get it. We’ve talked about this.” Amber assured, stroking your cheek before she pulled your blanket up higher. “Have you had anything to eat yet?”

“No. Just — the snacks.” You revealed.

“Where hurts, baby?” She asks quietly.

You couldn’t even answer her, which she found very strange. You would always tell her, that was the agreement. “Baby, talk to me.”

That started a complete meltdown, you were just sobbing your eyes out, shocking her to the core. It was so abrupt. She thought it must be bad, really bad. Amber’s never seen you like that before. But it seems to her that the nickname set you off.

“y/n,” Amber says, her palm resting on your abdomen to rub it in an attempt to calm you down. You flinched and cried out in pain. Squinting her eyes, she noticed something— underneath the thin fabric of your t-shirt, she felt a different…texture. Like a bandaid? She carefully lifted the fabric of your shirt to check, and her eyes nearly fell out of her head. It was surgical dressing. Which looked like it was supposed to be changed already. Amber was fuming. Why were you left home alone in this state? She gets up to step out into the hallway to make a call but you pulled her hand, refusing to let her leave. “Okay. Okay, baby. I’m right here.” She soothed.

Amber held her phone to her ear with one hand, the other was pulling your shirt back down while her eyes watched you closely.

“Iris.”

“Yes? Amber?”

“When did y/n go for the surgery?”

“Surgery? It’s just a procedure.”

“Iris, when?” Amber chewed on her lower lip, exhaling harshly.

“Two days ago.” Your mother answered, irritated.

“Why is she home alone so soon post-op?”

“She’s fine, she’s a big girl.” Iris scoffed, “She can take care of herself.”

Amber hung up when she heard that, putting her phone aside. “I need to get you a new dressing, babe.”

You looked clueless.

She couldn’t carry you, but she knew you needed that dressing changed— stat. So she got up to look for a new one and found a bag of them, along with medications and discharge instructions sitting on the kitchen counter. What did you do in the minute that she was away? Cry. You were still crying, terribly upset and uncomfortable, without better ways to express yourself now that you’ve…slipped. Grabbing the box of tissues from your vanity and pack of anti-bacterial wipes sitting on your desk along the way, she sat down next to you. You looked at her with teary eyes, breathing quicker than she liked you to be right now. Setting the items down, she held onto your hand. “You’re okay, I got you, baby.”

“Hurts.” You mumbled.

“I know, munchkin, I’m sorry.”

You clearly had no clue that you were one day post-op right now given your current state. Amber figured it out while walking downstairs to gather the supplies— she’s just never dealt with you when you were having a meltdown like this one. But thankfully, you seemed to have calmed yourself down significantly. “Stay still for me, hm?” She lets go of your hand and handed you a stuffed animal to hold onto in the meantime. “I need to change this bandaid for you, okay?”

You sniffled, nodding your head as you swallowed thickly as you hugged the stuffed rabbit. Amber leaned closer to get a better look of the dressing and determine the best way to remove it. She manages to get a corner of it off, but not without you yelping and flinching. She seethed, deciding to make use of a wet wipe to loosen up the adhesive and make sure there was lesser irritation. Of course, she was careful not to get the incision itself wet. It wasn’t her first time caring for you post-op, or well, post-procedure in your mother’s words. Either way, she successfully removes the used dressing and promptly cleaned around the area before sticking on a new one.

“All done.” Amber smiled at you before getting up again to get rid of the dressing’s wrapper.

Amber manages to get you to lie down more comfortably, then snuggles with you. You didn’t say anything, but she knew it always helps you feel better. “I feel funny.” You looked up at her. She feels your forehead with the back of her hand— you weren’t having a fever anymore. Which you did have before they decided to release you from the hospital. “Your tummy?”

You nodded, clinging onto her. “Do you want to go to the bathroom? I’ll help you.” You don’t resist, so she got you out of bed and helped you to the bathroom before you threw up. She wasn’t going to let you kneel knowing how difficult it would be, so she actually sat down on the edge of the tub so you could sit on her lap while you were bent over the toilet, fighting a gag. The procedure caused you a great deal of bloating, and the anesthesia causes you to be nauseous, so putting both together, this was expected. It sucked, but it was expected. Even after a bit of time’s passed already. Eventually, what little you managed to eat was regurgitated, sending you to tears. Broke Amber’s heart that you needed to feel like that, but it was a whole process. Inevitable process. She rubs your back, whispering words of assurances to you, “You’re alright, angel. I promise. Okay? Feel better?”

“Yes.” You murmured, and very slowly, she guided you back into your room, and had you sit down. But before she could say anything else, you were already crawling under the covers. With the bag of medications now being moved to your nightstand, she picks up the sheet containing discharge instructions and gave it a read.

“Mommy, hugs.” You sulked, Amber looks up from the paper and at you.

“Alright, I’m here, angel.” You moved up so she was right next to you, “C’mere.” She wrapped her arm around you for a bit but ultimately shifted you so that you were snuggled up against her. Your pain meds have started to kick in, but you were still regressed though you were no longer in a bad mood. Amber continually rubbed your lower back while she kept her focus on the paper she was trying to finish reading. By the time Amber was done, you’d dozed off, snuggled against her side and cuddling the same stuffed rabbit. She watches you sleep for awhile, then tucked you in properly. Following that, Amber goes around your room to tidy it up. It wasn’t too bad, but Amber believes that a cluttered space makes one feel worse. She also made sure she cleared out your trashcan and lined it with a new plastic bag just in case you needed it later and couldn’t make it to the bathroom in time. Very quietly, Amber descended the stairs and checked the pantry.

There was bread, so she could make you some toast. But then she saw applesauce, another good option since your stomach was likely still going to be upset for awhile. Now that you were asleep, she didn’t have anything to do. So she walked around your house for a bit before sitting with you again in your bed. But she lays down this time, instinctively stroking your arm or patting your back while you slept— arguably the most peaceful you’ve been all day. She’d brought your homework with her but now obviously wasn’t the time to have you work on that. Well, she also succumbed to sleep after some time and only woke up when she felt you stirring in your sleep. A quiet whine falls from your mouth. Were you in pain again? She hoped not.

“Hey.” She hums, “Baby, you’re okay. I’m right here. I’m right here, baby.”

“I’m hungy.” You mumbled.

“I’ll go make you some food? You want something?”

“I don’t know what I want.” You pouted, shifting uneasily. Every movement caused you an ache.

“How about applesauce?” She suggests.

“Okay.” You gulped, “Yeah.”

You got out of bed, and she got flustered. Immediately, she held onto you. “Baby, be careful.”

“I need to go potty.” You took a deep breath and immediately winced from the uncomfortable feeling.

“Sure, come on, I got you.” Amber held onto your arm as you walked. The bathroom door was left open, somehow Amber was too worried to leave. And she was right not to.

“Ah!” You seethed, hands balled into fists which caused her head to snap towards your direction.

She squints, “What’s wrong, baby?”

It probably hurt when you went, this was stated in the sheet as one of the possible ‘after effects’ of the catheter they had to have you use during the procedure and some hours after.

“Breathe, y/n. It’s alright, it’ll go away. Just breathe.” She cajoled.

Food aside, she also ensured you drank enough fluids to prevent other issues from surfacing. The sun was beginning to set at this point, casting a goldenish hue across the interior of the house. That brightened your mood a little to see. You were now in the living area, just sitting on the couch and watching the view. You loved the atmosphere now— it felt really calming. Amber was just walking back to you from the kitchen after grabbing two cups of applesauce and a coconut yogurt pouch. “You okay, honey?”

You nod, holding out your arms and wanting to cling onto her again. She lets you— obviously.

“You wanna do it yourself?” She opened up the cup for you and held out a spoon for you.

You shook your head without a word, then just leaned onto her, your face smushed against her arm. She laughed, smooching the top of your head. “Okay, here we are. Ah, open up.” She nudged, the spoon right by your lips. You listened and just ate like she told you to, the hunger was getting to you so you fought through the stomach discomfort. “Good girl.” She smiled, “Here comes another.”

“Will you stay with me? Sleepover?” You asked, swallowing the mouthful of applesauce while looking at her with big doe eyes. It wasn’t intentional, by any means. You were just like that when you were regressed.

“Of course I will, munchkin. I will sleep over.” Amber looked at you in pure adoration. Her heart melts every time you looked at her like that. The food she got for you? You ate it all and asked for more after. So, Amber was relieved that your appetite was coming back. “What do you want, baby?”

“A sandwich.” You decided.

“You wanna make one with me?” She suggested.

You nodded eagerly. “Alrighty, up we go. C’mon, let’s go to the kitchen.” She says with a bit of a laugh.

“What kind of sandwich do you want, angel?”

“Uh…” You pursed your lips together in thought. What was that called again?

You turned around and opened the fridge, pulling out turkey ham slices and cheese. “That’s what you want?” She asked softly.

“Mhm.” You confirmed.

“Good choice.” Amber grins, getting right to work making a sandwich for you, and then another for herself since it was time for dinner anyway.

You sat next to her at the counter to eat, on her lap, actually. “Is that good?” She asks, biting into the sandwich.

“Yeah.” You nod, mouth full and grinning. She brushed the hair out of your face.

She couldn’t help it but chuckle, “I’m glad. Wanna take a quick shower after then I can do your hair the way you like it?”

“Yes, please.” You leaned your head on her briefly.

“Anything for you, munchkin.”

🏷️ Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartandstuff @pda128

[docholligay]

Mill Road Cemetery

I love cemeteries. I love cemeteries so much that my friends well know this about me, and when inviting me to the Mill Road Winter Fair, one of the first things Dani pointed out to me was the cemetery tours because, “I know you like that sort of thing.” And I do! Memento mori and all that, I am a dead Victorian dressed up like I’m in some sort of Call the Midwife cosplay situation. 

We took a tour there, the last of the day, that was essentially, “Doing all this fucking sucks and is really hard, please appreciate it” but done with a real sense of humor and good naturedness*. Now, I’ve done quite a bit of work in the past in cemeteries with the Montana Historical Society and other, smaller societies, so some of this was completely known to me: Trying to read historical records, historical records having been lost to fire, or not existing at all**. Boundaries being suggestions more than fact. The wear on the stones themselves making it difficult to decipher. 

I was not prepared for the brambles. 

When i was young I thought brambles were a story convention, I mean of coursre I knew things could be overgrown, but something like Sleeping Beauty and losing an entire castle, or something being quickly overgrown, that to me was just a device. And brambles seemed enough of a stock word that when i was little, I thought it was more an idea of something than reality. As I got older, I realized brambles were a real thing, but I thought of them along the lines of, say wild grapes in the South, or Morning Glories back home--quick-growing, of course, but to say they would cover up an entire graveyard in three or four years was hyperbole. When my friends bought their house and found a shed in the backyard, covered by brambles, I assumed it either hadn’t been maintained in twenty years or that they were being a little dramatic around the edges about it. Which is fine, I can be a little hyperbolic in the retelling myself, my stories aren’t intended to be “Doc’s Fareeha Amari level just the facts ma’am bullet points hour” they are meant to entertain and also I’m Jewish and so occsaionally it just happens that God tells you someone else is right and you tell him to fuck off, you weren’t talking to him*** and sure that happened, in a sense. 

But it was not hyperbole. She showed us a place they’d cleared last year, and the brambles were already crawling over the graves, threatening the edges of the epitaphs. Brambles are covered in thorns, they are thick and unwieldy. To take so much work, only to have it be undone so quickly. In Montana, it’s dry, and I can still point out the small Chinese graves in the corner of the cemetery. In Helena, we even had wooden ones that were still, just barely, readable. The water pours over these stones, the ivy picks it apart, the brambles cover it, all things I never had to deal with. 

There’s something poetic in that, I think. The brambles are going to cover this again, and they will be as thorny and thick as before. But we clear it anyhow. We clear it to find the things that might be otherwise forgotten, we clear it because it’s important to remember, we clear it because doing the work of clearing is its own reward, and we clear it because we’d hope someone would clear it for us. That you cannot win, at the end of the day, doesn’t matter. That’s a kind of love, I think, to fight for people you will never and did never know, because they were still important, and they deserved to be known and seen, if only for a moment. 

I thought about the brambles a lot, after. I’m thinking of them now. I’m hoping no one ever gives in to them. 

*I am having my doubts as to whether or not this is actually a word, but I suppose I use blorbo without batting an eye, so here we are in heaven/hell. 

**Actually by the time I’m talking about the Brits have us horsewhipped for recordkeeping. That would make things much easier. 

***See: The oven of aknai

[akradekra]

Passionate Resuscitation Pt. 1 I can remember when it started. It was the scene in Superman Returns where Superman is at the hospital after falling from the sky. His suit being ripped off, showing his bare chest, the ambu bag over his mouth and nose, and finally the way his chest rose after being shocked by the device I didn’t know the name of yet. It awoke something in me, a desire, an obsession (it also may’ve awoken my bisexuality, but that’s another story). I wasn’t sure what it was, all I knew at the time was that that scene turned me on.

It took me years of watching similar scenes, doing research, and a couple fantasies to figure out what was going on: I was a cardiophile with a resus fetish. The sight of someone under CPR, using defibrillators to shock someone’s heart, heartbeats themselves, it really got me going, and it only grew as I went through adolescence, especially through high school and college. Of course, I kept all of this to myself for years. I didn’t let anyone know about my fetish, I COULDN’T let anyone know about it, because what would they think? Particular and strange fetishes are already generally frowned upon, and a resus fetish definitely fits into that category. So, I kept my fetish, my obsession, my desires, all to myself. That was until SHE came into the picture.

In many ways, she was my dream girl. Long curly red hair, mesmerizing bluish-green eyes, ruby red lips, silky smooth pale skin, an hourglass build, and of course, big round tits and a dump-truck ass. Men would give up an arm and a leg to be with her, women would get plastic surgery to look like her. Her looks weren’t the only thing she had going for her though. She was outgoing, she was funny, she was kind, she was caring, she took charge when need be, she was the life of the party. In other words, she was completely out of my league. Well that’s what I thought at first.

I’d seen her from time to time in previous years, but we officially met on the first day of the new semester. I was early to class and so I found a seat and just chilled. Then she walked in. I was mesmerized by her immediately. Then I realized she was heading in my direction. I slightly panicked a bit before she asked if the seat right next to me was taken. I said it wasn’t, and the next thing I knew this gorgeous lady was sitting right next to me. As we waited for class to start, she asked me if I had a spare pencil. I said yes, and gave it to her. Then she started asking me questions, simple ones like where I’m from, what other classes I was taking, my hobbies, interests, stuff like that. I was surprised by two things: 1. How easy it was to talk with her, and 2. How she was willing to talk to me, a random guy she just met, and how quickly we connected. We continued talking until the professor showed up and class officially started. As the lecture went on and on, I kept sneaking glances at her, checking her out. A few times, as I turned my eye to look at her, I thought I saw her eyes turning to look somewhere else. Was- was she checking ME out too? No way, how could this bombshell be checking me out? I didn’t think I was remotely attractive or close to her type, so I must be going crazy, right? Before I knew it, class ended, and I was getting my stuff to leave, but before I headed for the door, she gave me something, a folded piece of paper. She told me to read it when I went back to my dorm room, and gave me a wink before she left the classroom. This isn’t real, right?

I couldn’t stop thinking about the paper all day. I was anxious, waiting as the hours ticked by so I could immediately head for my dorm. Then, finally, the day was over and I went straight to my dorm. Upon arriving, I closed the door, sat on my bed, and opened the paper. On the paper was a phone number, as well as a note that read "You’re fun, call me sometime <3." Oh yeah, this was real.

Over the few weeks, we spent a lot of time together. Talking, studying, walking, reading, drawing, the works. We grew close, one thing led to another, and before I knew it, we confessed to each other. I couldn’t believe my luck, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, who I liked, liked me too. A part of me still thought this was all a dream, but when she kissed me, when she put her lips on mine, I knew it was real. This woman liked me, and she was now my girlfriend. I was in love. And for a while, I forgot all about my fetish. Until it happened.

She was visiting my dorm room for a studying session. I had to use the bathroom, so I left her unattended for a while as I did my business, as well as sprucing myself up a bit. When I exited the bathroom, I noticed she was sitting on my bed looking at a journal. I thought at first it was her note journal for class, but as I got closer, I realized it was one of MY journals, more specifically a sketch journal. When she noticed I was out of the bathroom, she turned to me and asked me what this was. She turned the journal around to show me what she was looking at and my stomach dropped. On the page she had open was a sketch of girl under CPR, with an intubation tube in her mouth. I froze. I started stuttering as she looked at me with a puzzled look on her face. Then I took a few deep breaths, sat down next to her, and began to talk.

I told her everything. About my resus fetish, about being a cardiophile, when it started, the whole story. She only interrupted once, when she pointed out that I liked to lay on her chest a lot, and that now she knew the reason why. After it was all said and done, we sat there together in silence. I couldn’t think of anything to say, and I was slightly embarrassed now that she knew about my fetish and the fantasies I had. I wasn’t sure what she would think. Maybe she thought I was a freak and was thinking how to tell me she was breaking up with me. Before I could think farther however, I felt her hand on mine. I turned to look at her, and found myself mesmerized by her eyes. Looking into them, I got the feeling that she was telling me things would be okay.

Before I could say anything else, she got off the bed and onto the floor. I asked her what she was doing, and she looked before saying "This is your fetish, isn’t it? I want to help you make it a reality." To say I was caught off guard would be an understatement. I was in shock. Was- was she really willing to let me do this stuff on her? No way. I asked if she meant it, to which she responded with astounding "hell yes." This was really happening, wasn’t it? With only a bit of hesitation, I got down on my knees next to her, while she laid herself on the floor. I sat there for a bit taking it all in, staring at her body. She was wearing a wonderful cotton beige turtleneck sweater which did a nice job of showing off her tits, and some tight denim jeans which also did a nice job showing off ass. I sat in a daze for a few seconds admiring her beauty before she called out to me, snapping me out of my trance. Once I gathered myself, we began.

The first thing I did was tell her to pretend to be dead. A little blunt, but we were both beginners in this situation so being clear was a must. She nodded before closing her eyes, parting her mouth a bit and let out a sigh like she’d just released her last breath. Her body relaxed, and her head fell to her right side so she could sneak glances at me. With that step done, I put two fingers on her neck. She had a pretty neck, one that was well defined, not too short, not too long. It also had some marks on it from when we made out last night and I nibbled on her neck a bit. I placed my fingers on her neck just below her jawline to feel for her pulse. Of course, since she was alive and breathing, it was there. I felt it beat under my fingers, around 60 beats per minute, the average amount. Despite already checking her pulse, I couldn’t help but place my ear on her chest and listen to her heart beating.

Ba-bum, ba-bum, ba-bum.

It was soothing, hypnotizing almost. I guess she knew this too since she put her hand on my head and gently scratched it. I stayed there laying on her chest for a minute before snapping out of my trance, looking at her and joking "aren’t you supposed to be dead?" We both giggled at my joke before she kissed my forehead and resumed her "dead" state. I put a finger up to her nose to feel her breathing. Again, since she was alive, of course she was breathing. She breathed gently in and out through her nose. Now that’ve checked all the areas, I now began the main attraction.

"No pulse, no breathing. Starting CPR." I had longed to say those words for years, and it felt satisfying to say them out loud, in a roleplay with my beautiful girlfriend no less. I began with rescue breathing. I gently lifted her chin up, and opened her mouth slightly more. I warned her that I would be pinching her nose shut, to which she gave me a thumbs up. With that, I gently pinched her nose with my thumb and index finger. I breathed deeply in, before I lowered my head to her mouth. The red lipstick she applied today made her lips stand out more so than usual, it made me crave her. Finally, I put my mouth over hers and gave her a slow breath into her lungs. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see her chest rise before going down gently. I repeated the process again: I breathed in, locked our mouths together, let out the breath into her lungs, then watched as her chest rose and fell, like clockwork.

With the rescue breaths done, it was now time for chest compressions, the part of CPR that really got me going next to defibrillation. I again warned her of what I would be doing, to which she gave her consent, nodding her head. I moved over to her torso, and decided I would tease her a little bit by gliding my fingers over her body before I reached her sternum in between her breasts. The smile that briefly crossed her face confirmed that she liked it. I placed one open hand on her chest, and the other clenched over that hand. I was ready. With both hands in place, I gently pushed on her chest, then let it return to its previous position manually. I did 29 more compressions for an even 30, the required amount. With every compression, she let out a huff of breath and her head slightly jiggled as I gently pushed her chest in. Needless to say, I was very turned on. After completing the set of compressions. I once again found myself staring at her body. She laid there, perfectly still, eyes still closed, and lips slightly parted, as if she was really dead, waiting for my next move. I watched as her chest slightly rose and fell, then I had an idea. I leaned over to her face and quietly whispered "I think your clothes might be restricting your air flow. I’m going to have take them off." The smile that appeared on her face was the confirmation I needed. "Does she really like this?" I thought to myself. "Is she enjoying this as much as I do?" If that was indeed the case, then I might just well be the luckiest son of a bitch on the planet. Without anymore hesitation, I gently picked her head and body up and started taking her sweater off of her. Once it was off, I also took off her bra as well. It was white lace, the one she knew I liked. With her bra and sweater off, I gently lowered her down on the ground again. As her head touched the ground, she opened her eyes and looked at me. I moved my hand to gently caress her cheek. She put up her own hand to hold mine in place there. I then lowered my head and gently kissed her. A kiss full of love and compassion for one another. She trusted me, and I trusted her. After a few minutes like this, she closed her eyes again and went back into her "dead" state. It was back to work.

After two rescue breaths, I turned my attention once again to her chest. With her sweater and bra now off, her bare chest were now exposed and I once again found myself mesmerized by her tits. They were big (D-cup), soft, and round, and her pink nipples, thanks to being in the open air, were rock hard. I had the desire to start sucking on them, but I reminded myself to stick to the task at hand. A real medic wouldn’t stop to suck on their patient’s breast while they were in cardiac arrest. I think. Anyway, I once again put my hands over her sternum and began chest compressions, counting each one as I pushed her chest in. Her breasts jiggled which each compression, and her stomach bulged out slightly as her chest caved in. If I wasn’t turned on before. I definitely was now.

We continued our CPR roleplay for what felt like hours. As time ticked by, I got more into it. I was more urgent, I went a little faster with the chest compressions, I’d check her pulse and pretend like there still was none and resume CPR, I started calling out her name, and begging her to stay with me and to breathe. I was fully immersed in what we were doing, I was enjoying it, and I think she was too. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore, I had to have her right then and there. I went over to her lips, but instead of doing rescue breaths, I started kissed her. She was taken aback a little by this at first, but a second later, she started kissing back, wrapping her arms around me, and pulling me close while my hands caressed her cheeks as we kissed passionately. I pulled my shirt off and threw it aside, and began taking off my pants as she did the same. We were now fully naked in my dorm room, and we were making love after I had performed CPR on the woman of my dreams. I had never felt a higher feeling of satisfaction and pleasure as I had on that day.

After it was over, we laid there on the floor, panting, sweating, completely out of breath from the vigorous sex we’d just had. I got up, then proceeded to pick her up from off the ground and laid her down on my bed. I then went to bathroom, grabbed a towel, then went back and wiped off the sweat from her beautiful body. I asked her if she wanted any water, to which she replied yes. I went to the mini-fridge I had and grabbed a bottle for the both of us. Once she drank out of it, I had a swig as well. She then asked me if I wanted HER to dry ME off with the towel. I accepted, and she wiped the sweat off me as well. After she was done, she threw the towel to the side, and pulled me onto the bed. Once I was on, she wrapped her arms around me, and I did the same.

We laid there for a while in each other’s arms, not saying anything, but looking in each other’s eyes and occasionally taking turns kissing one another in whatever body part we felt like. After a while like this, she asked me a question: "How come you didn’t tell me about your fetish before?" I replied honestly, confessing that I thought she’d consider me some type of freak, and not want anything to do with me. She raised her hand to caress my cheek, told me that would’ve never happened. She loved me because she thought I was cute and funny and kind and fun to be around, and having fetish wouldn’t change any of that. She followed this by saying that she liked what we did, that there was something sexy about it, and that she wouldn’t mind doing it again. Her reassurance, combined with knowing that she indeed liked what we did… It hit hard. Before I knew it, I was crying. Someone had not only accepted me, but accepted my fetish too, and I couldn’t help but cry. She held me in her arms close to her chest, as the tears flowed from eyes, gently rubbing my head, and gently planting soft kisses on it. When the tears finally slowed down, we looked each other in the eyes again. Then I did something I had wanted to do for a while. I told her to lay on her back for a second, which she did. Then I placed my hand on her chest, right on top of where her beautiful heart was. I felt it beat under my hand. A steady 60 beats per minute. Then, I planted a kiss right on that spot. She asked me what that was, and I answered "I just kissed your heart." Once again, she pulled me in close, gave me the biggest hug anyone had ever given me and called me the cutest guy she’s ever met. We laid there for a few minutes, as I rested my head on her chest, listening to the sound of her heartbeat.

Though, as I laid there, I found myself thinking "What if I had to perform actual CPR on her? Would that ever happen? Would I be able to save her? Would I still have a resus fetish afterwards?" I forced myself to stop thinking about it, no way was I going to let thoughts like that ruin this moment. Luckily, it was then that she made a joke about how we were supposed to be studying, and instead had a fake medical emergency and sex. We laughed at this for a while before I asked her if she wanted to shower. She of course accepted my offer, and we headed to the bathroom, thoughts of what had happened today and what would happen in the future floating in our heads.

To be continued…

Next >

[queen-of-the-avengers]

Captain Marvel: Part Eight

Pairing: Carol Danvers x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.4k

Warnings: canon violence and angst

Author’s Note: For the sake of the rewrite, Howard and Maria Stark dies on December 16, 1997 instead of 1991. Tony is 23 when they die.

x

You leave her side and find the 'T' section for Tesseract. If they have knowledge about it, what else do they have about it? The box is pretty empty since there isn't a lot of information on it, but you go through it with a fine-tooth comb. The only thing they know is that it's a box with an insane amount of power that can create portals. They got it from Howard Stark after Steve went into the ice. They tried testing it as a weapon, but it had a mind of its own, so Dr. Lawson took over and used it for her light-speed tech.

You're about to put the box back when you notice something at the very bottom. Interdimensional Republic. That's the company Markus owned. There isn't much on the company except that when the Tesseract opened a portal, they saw that name on a huge building before the portal closed. You sigh in relief and put the box back knowing that Markus will never find this place... if he's even out there.

You leave Vers to keep researching while you walk into the hallway to give yourself a breather. You're alone for maybe ten minutes before the sound of shoes clicking on the glossy floor sounds. You look up and see a man in his fifties walking toward you. You make the mistake of looking him in the eyes as he passes by you, and he stops and walks back over to you.

"I recognize you."

"Excuse me?"

"1945. Your face is plastered all over the newspapers from that time, and you even have your own section in the Smithsonian. You fought with Captain America."

"I'm sorry, you must have the wrong person."

"Well, then you won't care if I tell the authorities you're here."

"No!" you say too quickly. "What do you want?"

"I'm here to give you an opportunity. SHIELD is made up of dicks who only care about money and the power they hold. If you want to do something good in this world, join my side." He takes out one of his business cards and hands it to you. "I could use someone like you."

The mysterious man walks off without another word, and you look at the card he gave you. Dr. Hank Pym with Pym Technologies. You're not sure what he's up to, but you already have a big problem on your hands. Still, you put the car in your pocket and head back inside the archive's room.

Vers is over by the phone on the wall with her wrist device attached to the wires like she did when you first landed on Earth.

"Vers, what are you doing?"

"The only way we can know for sure about what happened is to talk to Maria. We need to contact Yon-Rogg. He will know what to do."

"Why? We've already gotten so much progress here ourselves because he's not here to screw it up. Do you see what using your powers can do? He's trying to manipulate you like every other Kree does."

Vers is confused about who to believe and who to trust, but she goes ahead and makes contact with Yon-Rogg despite what you've said.

"I know Lawson was Kree," she says before he has a chance to say anything. "She was here on C-53 and died in a plane crash. Do you know anything about this?"

"I just discovered a mission report sent from C-53. There's only so much I'm cleared to tell you Vers and Y/N, but Lawson was an undercover Kree operative named Mar-Vell. She was working on a unique energy core and experimenting with tech that apparently could help us win the war."

"Does it say anything about me? Or us?" you ask.

"Anything about you two? No, of course not. Why would it?"

"I found evidence that I had a life here," Vers confesses.

"On C-53?" he stutters.

"Mar-Vell is who I see as the Supreme Intelligence. I knew her, and I knew her as Lawson."

"This sounds like Skrull simulation, Vers."

"No, don't try and spin this off as some twisted delusion of your own," you growl.

"I remember I was here!"

"Stop! Remember your training. Know your enemy. It could be you. Do not let your emotions undermine your judgment."

"Go to hell." You hang up the phone. "Do not listen to him, Vers. He's manipulating you!"

"Where's Fury?"

"He's probably lost or captured. Come on."

You two leave the records room and head for the stairs. Just upon reaching the landing, you hear voices coming from above. You pull Vers into you and cover her mouth with your hand to let her know to be quiet.

"Fury's colluding with the target."

"Then why did he call us in?" a man that sounds like Agent Coulson asks.

"All I know is that we take him in too. Dead or alive."

Fury might have called them in, but you can't leave him here to get captured by who he thought was on his team. You wait for the two men to leave before heading back to the archive's room. Inside is Fury and his director fighting each other. You don't think someone's boss will pull a gun on their employee, which can only mean that the director is a Skrull looking for you and Vers. Vers blasts the director away from Fury, and he looks grateful for the save. She blasts the ceiling to use as a quick escape, and this is where you come in. You grab both of them and fly them through the hole Vers made.

"You called them in?" you scold.

"My bad!"

You find the staircase and yank the door open only to see Agent Coulson with a gun pointed at you. Vers' fists glow orange, but you put a hand to her hand to stop her from hurting Phil. Fury and Coulson have a silent conversation with their eyes, and Fury begs him not to give you away.

"Coulson, do you have eyes on them?" an agent says from above.

He takes five seconds to speak.

"They're not down here. Let's try another floor."

You three pass him on your way down to the hangar where all the airplanes are. Vers grabs a long metal pole and shoves it through the handlebars so that if someone were to try to use the door from the other side, it won't open. Once she knows it's safe, she holds her hand out as if she expects something from Fury. When he makes no move to acknowledge her, she hits his arm and holds out her hand again.

"What?"

"Give me your communicator. You obviously can't be trusted with it."

Fury sighs and hands over his pager to her just as agents slam into the locked door next to you.

"Come on!" you urge.

There isn't much to hide behind, but you manage to hide behind some large boxes that are ready to be shipped out. Agents break the door down to get inside the large room, and you weigh your options of escaping this unharmed. Vers spots one of the planes that can be used as a quick escape, and she nudges you and Fury.

With a mutual agreement, you stay hidden as you make your way over to the plane. Vers got behind the wheel, Fury took the passenger seat, and you got in the seat behind Vers. She begins messing with the controls as if she knows what she's doing. If what her memories show is true, then flying something like this is second nature to her.

"Do you know how to fly this thing?" Fury asks.

"Uh... we'll see."

"That is a yes or no question," Fury gasps. 

Whatever Vers is doing is right because the engine roars to life and the doors close behind you. She pushes the lever forward which causes the plane to hover in the air.

"That's what I'm talking about!" Fury laughs.

When the agents below hear the plane take off, they start shooting at it aimlessly. It does nothing and allows Vers to fly out of the underground tarmac area, and over the open desert before gaining altitude very quickly. Suddenly, a small meow comes from the back of the plane where a meow shouldn't be. All three of you look back and see Goose pushed against a crate.

"We've got a stowaway," Fury says.

"Hang on, Goose."

Vers straightens the plane, allowing Goose to push off the crate and onto the ground. She happily walks over to Vers and jumps onto her lap, and your girlfriend moves her over to Fury.

"Who's a good kitty huh? Huh, Goose? Yes, that's right. Who's a good kitty, Goose? You're a good kitty," Fury coos.

Vers reaches into her pocket and takes out the photograph she stole of Wendy, Maria, and her in the background, and hands it to Fury.

"Do you see anyone you know? Six years ago, I arrived in Hala, near dead with no memory. I think I'm the pilot that went down with Dr. Lawson, and if not, then the last person to see them both alive is Maria Rambeau."

"How do we get to Louisiana?"

"Due East and hang a right at Memphis," Fury jokes.

"You must have taught Agent Coulson right because I appreciate the way he stuck up for us."

"Yeah, he's the new guy. I guess he doesn't hate me yet."

"Give him time," you joke.

"I guess he had a feeling and went with his gut against orders. It's a really hard thing to do. That's what keeps us human."

"I get in trouble for that. A lot," Vers sighs.

"Yeah by an ignorant asshole who gets off on manipulation," you comment.

"I can see that about you, and even you too, Y/N. Rescuing the guy who sold you out to the Skrulls. I guess that's not standard Kree operating procedure."

"Well, I won't tell your boss if you don't tell mine."

"He won't be hearing about this from me," you smirk.

Vers flies the aircraft all the way to Louisiana where Maria Rambeau is. She is very isolated from most of the population, but it's nice to see such big trees and open fields around her house. Next to her house is a shop used to fix cars, or in her case, planes. When you get a closer look at the shop, you can see a woman tinkering on a two-seater plane. This is Vers' moment since she knew Maria back in the day.

"Excuse me, I'm looking for Maria Rambeau."

The woman jumps in surprise and a little girl identical to the older woman jumps out of the plane. She runs over to Vers with an excited look on her face as if she knows who she is.

"Aunty Carol! Mom, it's Aunty Carol. I knew it! Everybody said you were dead but we knew they were lying."

The little girl hugs Vers who is apparently named Carol. Your girlfriend stands awkwardly, unaware of who this child is. Maria walks closer to Vers with an unsure look on her face like she can't believe what she's seeing.

"I'm not really who you think I am," Vers says.

Maria isn't sure if this is her friend or not, but she wants to hear what Vers has to say. Monica, Maria's daughter, and Maria are sitting with you, Vers, and Fury in the living room so you can explain to them what happened after the plane crash. Vers' name isn't even Vers. It's the name that the Kree gave her to help conceal her identity.

Her real name is Carol Danvers.

"That is the craziest shit I've ever heard," Maria chuckles once you're done explaining.

"Green-transforming aliens? There's no such thing," Monica says.

"I'm an alien," you shrug.

"You're absolutely right, young lady. There is no such thing because if there were, we would want to keep that to ourselves," Fury says and looks at you accusingly.

"You want proof?"

Carol gets up and walks over to the tea kettle on the stove in the kitchen. She grabs the sides of the kettle and uses her powers to heat the tea inside. You raise your hand and use your air powers to open the cabinet and float one of the tea cups over to where Carol is. Maria and Monica stand up in fascination and curiosity.

"No way. That is so cool," Monica grins. 

"They can do a lot more than just make tea with those hands," Fury scoffs.

"Like what? Show us."

"Maybe later," Carol chuckles.

"I kept all your stuff, I'll go get it," Monica says and rushes out of the room.

"You want to give her a hand with that?" Carol asks Fury who nods.

He leaves the room to give Carol and Maria some time alone together, and you get up to leave when Carol grabs your hand. This is all so new to her, but you're her safety net. She trusts you with her life, so she needs you here in case something goes wrong.

"So, her name is Carol?" you ask Maria.

"Yeah. You don't remember anything?"

"I see flashes of little moments, but I can't tell what's real. If I could just piece together what happened that morning, maybe it'll all make sense."

"You were banging on my door at dawn and woke me up. I didn't think anything of it because that's what you normally did. Back then, we had to get up so early. The Air Force wasn't letting women fly in combat, so testing Lawson's planes was our only shot at doing something that mattered. That morning, you wanted to race to the base but your old Mustang was nothing compared to my Camaro. You cheated and took a shortcut," Maria laughs at the memory.

There are tears in Carol's eyes at the thought of her stolen life, but she doesn't let them fall.

"Since when is a shortcut cheating?"

"Since it violates the predetermined rules of engagement."

"I definitely don't remember those."

"Mmm, of course, you don't." They both laugh like old friends. "When I got to the hanger, Lawson was agitated, because she had lives to save. She was trying to take the Aces up herself, but you said—"

"If there were lives at stake, I would fly the plane," Carol finish for her.

"Yup. Big hero moment. The kind of moment we've both been waiting for. The Doc was always unique. That's why I liked her, but now you're saying she's from another planet."

"I know this must be hard for you," you comment.

"What, this part right here? No. Do you know what's hard? Losing my best friend in a mission so secret they act like it never even happened. Hard is knowing you were out there somewhere, too damn stubborn to die. Now you come up in here after six years with your super-charged fire hands and magical friend, and you expect me to call you... I don't even know what... 'Vers'? Is that really who you are now?"

"I don't know," Carol sighs.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[alostwanderernotfound]

So, to do what we must to save the world from destruction..

He was at work laboring to create the protectors to stop one of the creators from destroying everything. He was building.

He sat. What appeared as a man: brown hair, lighter pale skin, thin, & we were similar in height. He stood perhaps 5’7 or 5’8 I guessed.

We both existed before this moment & in each other we felt peace. His few breaks between creating, we embraced one another. He spoke of deep love and commitment. Each moment he did not work, we sat together hand in hand.

He had created creation that sat before us, the ones to protect the rest of us & prevent the destruction of the world. He spoke and talked to each.

One creation he cooed over in his enamored state. He looked at her female form as if he romantically loved her. He looked upon her with an odd familiarity, one of recognition instead of in wonder at something new. His heart & his soul on display felt different.

It was peculiar. I asked him about something we had done earlier in the day and he did not know the answer. It was if I was invisible and she was the only thing that existed. It was if he was someone else now that creation had been built.

That is when I asked him. “Do you think the creator that hates our world might have implanted his own device to switch out your consciousness & control your body too?”

His eyes seemed to fill with a strange & dangerous emotion. “Whatever do you mean?” I grew scared. I knew the other creator had done this to me too.

Then all we discussed prior to this moment to protect this world was thrown away. The seemingly new creator in this familiar body before me advocated against what we had already agreed upon before he made these creations. I felt as if I watched it all crumble. I spoke of how things were to be when all of the original creators met and agreed a long time ago. I created plans, logistics, problem solved, & innovated to create systems that would promote cohesion & safety. We all agreed upon these plans & rules for safety. The creator said he changed his mind.

I was stunned. And I looked at the path before us, just as we started the newest chapter and I knew my destined path was of suffering.

He then said had decided to take a new wife. And just like that.

I found myself alone. Unprotected. Sick all the time. Then the changes he told to everyone took effect.

I warned them. This one before you, he may not be the real one who built you. I fear he may hurt you.

They followed his lead.

And it became a very dangerous world.

[storiesofstratos]

Chapter 8: Daniel Left to His Own Devices

Separated from his friends, Daniel meets someone new...

Leah Nguyen is an OC created by my good friend Shima, who was gracious enough to allow me to include her in the story! Please go give Shima some love <3 Leah is from @elganac and Shima is on twitter @/ShimaVT

So I found myself alone for the first time since the trip started. Everyone else had gone to do their own thing, and Jack and Nico were off helping to collect firewood. Didn’t really appeal to me, so I stayed behind. So it was just wandering, until I saw the lake. That was ridiculous.. Who would go swimming in this weather?

Then I heard the splash of someone getting out of the water. No way. Who the hell would even think to–

Oh. OH. I was immediately fixated on her eyes. A beautiful shade of dark brown, shining in the early evening sun. Her black hair falling just to her shoulders, a little messed up and wet from the water she’d just pulled herself out of. Not even mentioning that cute little polka-dotted swimsuit that just–

I’m getting ahead of myself.

I stood there for what felt like an absolute eternity. Did I know her from somewhere? Obviously she went to my school, she must have been in my grade too.. Did I have a class with her? Hmm, no, I would’ve recognized her. Shit, was I staring? C’mon Rowe, just TALK to her. She’s cute! Go get her number, or, something! That was a thing normal people did, right?

“Uh..hello??” Her voice snapped me out of my thoughts. Shit. I totally WAS staring wasn’t I?

“Uh.. h-hey.” Nailed it. “You.. like swimming..?” Nailed it less.

I watched as a small smile crept up on her face. Hopefully that was a good sign and she wasn’t just… laughing at me. In her head, or something.

“I mean… yeah. I’m the only one swimming in this weather, aren’t I?”

“Oh, uh.. Yeah, true, true…” Come on Rowe, think of something, anything else to say! “Do… you mind if I sit with you?”

“Uh, yeah! Sure, go for it. I mean, not like anyone else is gonna be over here with us, y’know?” I watched as she patted the space next to her, which is where I took a seat. “I’m Leah, by the way.”

“Daniel. It’s nice to meet you. I don’t think I’ve seen you around before.”

She shrugged, “It is a pretty big school. I don’t even know the names of all the people in our grade.”

“Yeah. Fair enough… I don’t really need to know many names aside from my friends, and… well, I guess yours now, too.”

“Wow, you’re gonna remember my name? I’m so touched.” She laughed to herself… wow. That was a sound I could listen to for the rest of my life and be happy.

“...You’re really pretty–”

“Huh?”

“What?”

There was a silence between us, “Uh, the, the sunset! It’s… really pretty, don’t you think?” I just hoped she didn’t think much of it. It was autumn, so the sun was already starting to set… yeah, that was it.

“Oh… Right. I mean… yeah, like, it is pretty. I guess.”

“Hey, you two!” A voice called out to us, one of the other students, “Mr. Walker wanted to gather everyone up for dinner, c’mon.”

I stood up at that, holding out my hand to Leah. “Wanna go grab some food?”

She looked at my hand for a second, before nodding and finally taking it, allowing me to help her up off the ground. “Yeah. Food sounds good.” She smiled at me, and it didn’t go unnoticed that her hand lingered in mine for a little longer than necessary.

…Was this what it was like? Had I made it? No wait, focus.

Dinner was sort of a blur. Leah had been called away to go over and hang out with her other friends, and I ate with Jack and Nico. “Soo… You two know that girl over there?” I nodded toward Leah.

Nico took a look over her shoulder. “Oh, her? Uh, yeah I know her. Leah Nguyen. We’ve got history class together, and we’re sharin’ a tent on the trip, actually.”

“Wow,” Jack piped up, “I’m surprised. Didn’t think you knew anyone’s name in your history class. Though you hated them all.”

“I do, mostly. But we got put in a group project about Aztec history and hot damn, that girl was a godsend.”

“By that you mean she actually pulled her weight?”

“Oh yeah. Got her number, told her next time there’s a group project, I want first dibs on her. She thought I was funny. Why, what about her?”

“Well, I just,” I was at a loss for words, “I mean, we talked earlier, and I just…” Uh oh. She saw me looking over at her, didn’t she? I watched as she gave me a polite little wave, which I returned. “I mean, y’know, we just talked for a bit and…”

“Uh oh,” Jack’s immediate response, “Daniel’s got a crush.”

“What? Pff, no I don’t.”

“You totally do. Dude you’re looking at her the same way you looked at Stacy Sherman back in middle school.”

I groaned, “Can we PLEASE not talk about Stacy Sherman? I’d like to block that dance from my memory forever, thank you.”

Nico just looked between us, confused, “Wait, what happened with Stacy Sherman?”

“Daniel asked her to a dance back in middle school. She said yes, but the night of the dance, she just left him. The whole time, wouldn’t even look at him, it was so fucked up.”

“Wow,” Nico tossed her paper plate in a nearby trash can. “I think I hate Stacy Sherman.”

“You and me both, she was a huge bitch with a capital.. BITCH.”

“Okay, yeah, she was not… the greatest, but I mean, that was the past! That was like… three years ago, I’ve grown as a person. I make better choices now.”

“You do?” Nico spouted out, “Since when? Or has that not started yet?”

I just looked at her. “You are so annoying.” Was all I could say in response to her little gremlin laugh.

I didn’t see Leah again the rest of the night. She had her own group of friends to hang out with, I didn’t wanna bother her. But Jack crawled into our tent that night brimming with interest. “So, you gonna ask her out or what?”

“Dude, I dunno. I really don’t want a repeat of what happened with Stacy, I mean… I don’t know if Leah would do that, but…”

“It’s hard to think about after something like that, huh?”

“Yes! That sucked, like, a lot, and I really don’t want it to happen again.”

Jack settled into his sleeping bag. “Yeah… okay, I’ve made up my mind. I’m gonna help you.”

“You? Help me?” I sat up and looked at him. “Dude, aren’t you like… the king of not confessing to your crush? I mean when are you gonna tell Nico that you–”

“When the time is right,” He cut me off, “But, that is not important right now. You’re my best friend dude. So, here’s the plan. Nico wants to walk the trails tomorrow, so when we’re out, we’ll talk about it, see what we can do.”

I just sighed and looked up at the ceiling of the tent. “Yeah… okay, that sounds good…”

“I knew you’d come around to the idea.” Jack smirked as he laid back down. “G’night, Daniel.”

“Night Jack.”

And it wasn’t long before I was out like a light.

[thebreakfastgenie]

for WIP asks the 4th of july fic.

and ik you were already quite generous with it but would love to hear anything else about 69

Sorry it took so long to get to this one! I was really excited about it and then I was either too busy or too tired to answer it properly!

The 4th of July fic my take on a time loop. It's contained within GFA. Hawkeye relives July 4th, 1953, over and over again, trying desperately to prevent tragedy on the bus, while no one else remembers. I was actually influenced a lot by Slaughterhouse-5, even though it's not a time loop. Billy Pilgrim is unstuck in time and sometimes that means he's living his post war life and wakes up back in the bombing of Dresden. That's certainly what PTSD can feel like. So I started thinking about how I could use a time loop as a narrative device.

The time loop takes the emotional experience of reliving a traumatic event over and over again in your mind, of being trapped in that moment, and makes it a physical one. A common component of time loop stories is that the protagonist must prevent something terrible from happening, and only when the bad outcome is averted will the loop be broken. This, too, reflects an emotional experience, the constant "what could I have done differently? how could I have stopped this?" Maybe the real time loop was the trauma we had along the way.

In this case, Hawkeye is trying to save the lives of everyone on the bus. I don't want to say too much about the loop, because part of the story is going to be figuring that out as Hawkeye does. Just as the loop is about trauma, breaking the time loop is about moving forward. This fic gets very heavy and dark towards the middle, but it's not a pure angst fic, it's just what the story requires. In the end I would say it's about choosing hope.

The idea is basically what if GFA was a time loop, and we only saw one iteration of it? That means it's fairly canon-compliant. I'm also trying to incorporate a lot of details from GFA. I can't share a snippet, but I'm hoping to finish it by July 4th, 70 years after the day it's set, so if I manage it you'll see it soon!

****

I am more than happy to share more about untitled 69. I'm trying to motivate myself to work on it, at least once 4th of july is done. I had a ton of momentum on it a few months ago and then I got sick and it got left in this very chaotic, mid-draft-reorganization state. This fic was supposed to just open with Trapper at the reception for the new chief of thoracic surgery, where he meets Charles, but in true me fashion, I ended up getting into Trapper's homecoming and emotional state and in the process writing about a bunch of stuff that happened earlier. One thing I'm excited about is how Trapper relates (or doesn't) to his colleagues. He has one friend who's close enough to know about Hawkeye, because I needed someone to bounce Trapper off of in dialogue, and I really love the dynamic that developed between them. I don't think this snippet is as good as the last one, but:

Trapper tugged at his collar. He was having trouble breathing, though he knew that had more to do with the fog of cigarette smoke than the snugness of his tuxedo. If Louise were here, she would scold him—it had taken her ages to get his bowtie right—but she wasn’t here, so she could keep her comments to herself.  Louise hated these things almost as much as he did. Working class girls either grew up into women who loved glamor or hated it, and Louise had never seen any use for it. It was one of the things he loved best about her, and probably what drew him to the nurses in Korea, besides proximity—their short fingernails and practical attitudes. 

This is Trapper being miserable at the party (more on that later!) and me fleshing out both him and Louise a little bit.

[goshdangronpa]

For the Dr3 AMA thing, if you're still taking it, do you think that the brainwashing plot was a good idea? And was it better to keep Chiaki as an AI or to make her human in the anime?

I am taking it as long as people are asking about it! I knew about both these things long before seeing the show, so my perspective may be skewed by other people's perspectives, but in short: mixed, and human.

In long ...

Even if I hadn't seen so many complaints about brainwashing before starting the show, I'd probably share the same gripe as everyone else. I would've preferred a story of how a master manipulator twists an entire class of nice people into carrying out her dark mission, each character's downfall leading to the next like dominos, with a connected sideplot that puts actual faces to the Reserve (meaning more than just the one episode with Natsumi and Sato).

BUT ... I can see why the writers took this approach to making the SDR2 kids fall into despair:

It's by far the most expedient method - almost everyone even falls into despair at the same time! - and when you have a dozen episodes to give this backstory, you've gotta save time wherever you can.

It removes some of the culpability of these characters in the apocalypse. You wanna love them, and the writers want you to empathize with them. Having them choose to kill or otherwise ruin countless lives is harder for some to accept than having their agency totally robbed.

The story I would've preferred is just not the story they wanted to tell. The Despair Arc had to pull double duty as both its own story and the background for the Future Arc. Time that could've been spent showing Class 77-B or the Reserve Course careening towards despair instead had to give crucial backstory on Chisa, Munakata, and Juzo.

Brainwashing is a plot device of tremendous utility in DR3. The easy way isn't always the right way. With that said, the climax of DR3 as a whole, where Ryota plans to brainwash the entire world and the others must fight for free will, arguably makes it a worthwhile addition? It really highlights how in Danganronpa as a whole, a major part of Hope as a concept is free will. Good people feel forced to commit murder most foul by their extreme circumstances, protagonists never fight solely for self-preservation, and DRV3 would drop the hope stuff altogether and bring that to the forefront in its own climax. I'm just saying, maybe people are a little harsher on the brainwashing stuff than it deserves.

Uh, on to Question #2!

Speaking of DR3's ending, the reveal that the Neo World Program originally would've mined everyone's memories to create an original composite character, only to find someone they all already knew, loved, wanted to see again, and would've fought for ... man, that tugged the heartstrings. Chiaki being a living person before her second life as a guardian AI just makes sense, but what they do with her, how far they go with her, and how much it retroactively colors her SDR2 incarnation all seemed pretty damn good to me. Like, she's so good that I now support komahina even more because she deserves better than Hajime.

Is there much controversy about Chiaki’s portrayal in DR3? I haven't heard any complaints about it. Maybe because most people save that for the rest of the story ...