#Twain Lamb

[blueey-jayzilla]

The 7 lambs!

Bit of a design practice

[newyorkthegoldenage]

Poster for New Members' Night by James Montgomery Flagg, November 15, 1928. The Lambs was America’s first professional theatrical club, established in New York in 1874. As a social club, the Lambs nurtures those active in the arts, as well as those who are supporters, by providing fellowship, activities, and a clubhouse for members. Mark Twain Tonight (with Hal Holbrook) and Stalag 17 were first performed at The Lambs before they went on to national success. Alan Jay Lerner and Frederick Loewe first met at the Club. Since its founding in 1874, there have been more than 6,700 Lambs.

Source: Artvee.com

[aestheticpearl]

— 𝐬𝐚𝐦 𝐱 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐧’ 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬

darlin’ has dyed their hair every color and will ask sam to help them cover their roots when they need a touch up

once darlin’ accidentally got bleach on sam’s favorite flannel and they were so sorry about it they literally kept apologizing

“darlin’ it’s really fine, i have another—”

“SAM I AM SO SORRY”

darlin’ may or may not have cried over ruining his flannel, they were upset with themselves

sam had to pull out a flannel that was literally the exact same to calm them down

sam loves how warm darlin’ is all the time

darlin’ will sometimes shift into wolf form and lay in front of an open window so the sun makes their fur all warm and then they will walk over to sam and let him cuddle them

sam loves those cuddles cause darlin’ is all warm

sam mentioned his favorite drink once and now darlin’ keeps the house stocked with said drink always

darlin’ when in wolf form around sam will absolutely wag their tail shamelessly

sam also pets darlin’ like how dad’s pet big dogs, they more pat them then pet

darlin’ loves it

once in a while sam will gently pet darlin’s face, in and out of wolf form

darlin’ loves buying those little blind bag minis, especially the keychain ones

definitely has a collect of blind bag keychains

also they always seem to pull the one that they wanted, like darlin has extremely good luck with them for some reason? it baffles sam to say the least

sam has taken darlin’ on one of his drives and darlin’ will stick their head out the window the whole time

darlin’ sleeps with their childhood stuffed animal still (it’s a lamb that they named lambie)

“can lambie sleep on the bedside table tonight so i can hold you properly?”

“no you can hold me properly while i hold them”

sam gets use to it

one night darlin’ started leaving lambie on the bedside table and never looked back

“no lambie tonight?”

“i feel safe without them, you make me feel safe”

darlin’ delivered some of the most emotional words then promptly passed out

sam damn well near cried at them

sam showed darlin some country music and their favorite song ended up being ‘forever and for always’ by shania twain

darlin’ once came home soaked from the rain cause they refused to bring an umbrella even after sam told them it was going to rain

whole place smelled like wet dog for a week

if sam ever bit darlin’ i feel like they would bite him back and sam would be all like ????

sam loves when darlin’ accidentally falls asleep on him and it happens a lot

darlin’ can and will fall asleep anywhere

but be warned darlin’ is always chasing something in their sleep which leads to kicking

darlin’ will abuse sam’s healing magic

“sammm i jammed my finger!”

“i assume you want me to kiss it better?”

“mhm”

sam will wrap his hand around the jammed finger to heal it and then kiss it before letting go

darlin’ calls them his magic kisses

i don’t really see darlin’ as a tough scar covered person, i think they’re just a regular looking person who needed time to open up

.love always <3 pearl

.masterlist

[noose-lion]

will you tell me about your warriors au

I think about this crack au too often. Anyway, sorry it took me so long to type this up!!!

Not gonna lie making a comic with this concept would heal me in a way.

So our clans are Dayclan (Special Division), Nightclan (Port Mafia), Duskclan (Ada) and Dawnclan (Guild but also a few Doa members). Instead of living in the forest or around a lake, these clans live on the edge of a port town.

The Order of the Clock Tower are basically going to be Bloodclan btw, the Hunting dogs minus Tachihara are the Pack.

Obviously, Tiger later known as Tigermoon (Atsushi) is our protagonist. He's a former kittypet, that lived in a orphanage, fed and taken care of by the children. The old caretaker died and was replaced by a cruel man. Tiger was protective of the children and tried to defend them, the cruel man hurt him badly and locked him in the basement. He barely survived, and nearly starved he escaped out a broken window.

He was eventually found by an eccentric cat who called himself a warrior of Duskclan. Things Tiger only knew of as fables.

The following events are more or less a fusion of warriors and bsd.

Any connection has been lost to Starclan (basically replacing the Book), and the Clans are desperate to fix this. There was a prophecy of a great mythical tiger being the guardian of the path back to the stars, so of course the appearance of Tiger(moon) threw the clans into desperation.

Individual characters have their own backstories and stuff, too much stuff for one post, I will answer any questions.

I'm going to break down the clans a little:

Dayclan: Considered the most elusive and secretive of the clans, a part of their territory overlaps with open farmland.

Duskclan: Considered the cleverest and best hunters, their territory runs alongside a river in a well wooded area.

Nightclan: Considered the strongest and most ruthless warriors of the clans, their territory lies in a heavily forested area between the ocean and the town.

Dawnclan: Considered the boldest and most reckless of the clans, their territory straddles the port/warehouse district and a small wooded area.

Character names and clan alignment below.

I put a lot of thought into the names they all contain obscure references and metaphors.

*There are several bsd background characters I didn't include that are simply not super important for the current plot I have forming in my head, if you want me to give them a warrior cat name and affiliation just tell me.*

Duskclan (Agency)

Leader- Wolfstar (Fukuzawa)

Deputy- Steadystrike (Kunikida)

Medicine-cat- Mothflower (Yosano)

Warriors-

Greengaze (Ranpo)

Brokenweb (Dazai)

Lightsnow (Tanizaki)

Tigermoon (Atsushi)

Nightfrost (Naomi)

Apprentices-

Molepaw(call) (Haruno)

Bullpaw(step) (Kenji)

Rabbitpaw(foot) (Kyouka)

Kits- Boldkit (Aya)

Elders- Brownbean (old cafe guy)

---

Nightclan (Mafia)

Leader- Spiderstar (Mori)

Deputy- Ramhorn (Chuuya)

Medicine-cat - Lemontree (Kaiji)

Warriors-

Silversmoke (Hirotsu)

Bloodblossom (Kouyou)

Rushcoat (Akutagawa)

Scarnose (Tachihara)

Goldstone (Higuchi)

Hiddenshadow (Gin)

Jewelshine (Ace)

Apprentices-

Dreampaw(field) (Q)

Gleampaw(skip) (Elise)

Cloverpaw(fate) (Karma)

---

Duskclan (Special Division)

Leader- Hailstar (Taneda)

Deputy- Owleye (Ango)

Medicine-cat-

Warriors-

Shadowmoon (Mizuki Tsujimura)

Russetfang (Yachiyo Murakoso)

Crowblizzard (Aoki Takuichi)

I need more for this clan kinda bare, would love suggestions.

---

Dawnclan (Guild, and kinda DOA)

Leader- Goldstar (Fitzgerald)

Deputy- Rattail(star) (Fyodor)

Medicine-cat - Softstep (Louisa)

Warriors-

Scarletfur (Hawthorne)

Blackthroat (Lovecraft)

Grapevine (Steinbeck)

Stripecoat (Nikolai)

Hawkeye (Twain)

Skyfall (Sigma)

Batfang (Bram)

Ravenheart (Poe)

Smallbug (Mushitarō)

Apprentices-

Redpaw(storm) (Lucy)

Huckleberrypaw (Huck Finn)

Timberpaw (Tom Sawyer)

Queens- Windsong (Margaret)

Elders- Seasand (Herman Melville)

---

Others

Loners-

Blackfox (Verlaine)

Summerstar (Natsume)

Rogues-

Sheep (Shirase)

Lamb (Yuan)

Kittypets-

Snailnose- Katai

Deceased-

Bearshiver (Rimbaud)

Clearsight (Oda)

Cherrykit (Sakura), Pouncekit (Kosuke), Flipkit (Katsumi), Chirpkit (Yu), Quietkit (Shinji) (The Orphans)

Albatrosspaw (Albatross)

Blackice (Iceman)

Swiftwire (Pianoman)

Needleclaw (Doc)

Foxface (Lippmann)

Woolheart (Murase)

Blue (Sasaki)

Eelpaw (Rokuzo Taguchi)

Newttail (N)

Mimic (Gide)

Non-cats-

The Pack (Dogs)

Lion (Fukuchi)

Soul (Teruko)

Snow (Tetchō)

Sorrow (Jouno)

Badger

Sod (Adam)

[acgasfanchallenge]

Spring Fever Challenge

“Don’t you know what that is? It’s spring fever. That is what the name of it is. And when you’ve got it, you want—oh, you don’t quite know what it is you DO want, but it just fairly makes your heart ache, you want it so!”

― Mark Twain, Tom Sawyer, Detective

These are the prompts. The Collection will be open for submissions until the End of March/Easter.

https://archiveofourown.org/collections/ACGASSpringFeverChallenge/profile

1. Prompts:

- Primrose

- Daffodil Ball

- Silk

- Bow tie

- Mud

- Hay Fever

- Dalliance

- Poem

- Stockings

- Lambs

2. Song Prompts:

- When a man loves a woman

Percy Sledge

- Loving you’s a dirty job

Bonnie Tyler

- You sang to me

Marc Anthony

- For once in my life - Michael Buble / Frank Sinatra / Emily Sandé

[thecheshirehouse]

I'm Dreaming of a Cheshire Easter

by Ismaeel Clarke

The Cheshire Cat grinned an inane kind of a grin. He had a large variety of grins, which he would use on various special occasions, and this was a particularly inane sort of a grin, for he had Guests. He was spread on a sort of regal russian rug, carefully embroidered with all sorts of different patterns zig-zagging across each other, arguing over which one ought to be on the top, and this had been thrown carelessly upon a windowsill that looked for all the world like it was trying to escape into the spring-time country outside. The lambs gambolled in the fields, as lambs are apt to do; the daffodils swayed in the fields, as daffodils are apt to do; and the politicians walked around kicking puppies in the fields, as politicians are apt to do. 

The Cheshire Cat sat on a Cheshire Rug in his Cheshire House dreaming Cheshire dreams of days long past — and feeling very grateful that he wasn’t the Merseyside Cat, as Cheshire was a much better name. He suddenly remembered about the Guest, and grinned a little wider — in a vapid sort of manner, that being how he grinned. 

“Hello,” you said, poking your head round the Cheshire Door and looking into the Cheshire House, “I don’t suppose you have such a thing as a story about you, by any chance?”

When he saw you arrive, he frisked his tail in such a very frisky sort of a manner that you thought it a most frisky tail indeed. “Well,” said the Cat, “I may well do, but then again, I may not. You never can tell with stories. Except, of course, when you can.” 

By this point, of course, you were feeling a little confused, and said so. 

“Oh dear,” you said, “I’m feeling a little confused.” 

“There’s no need to repeat yourself,” said the Cat, good-naturedly. 

“But I didn’t repeat myself!” you said, rather indignantly. 

“Indeed you did,” said the Cat, “Once in your head, and once out loud.”

“But if I didn’t say it out loud,” you said, “you wouldn’t know what I had said.” 

“Ah,” said the Cat, “but if you only said it out loud, then I should.” 

Well, you weren’t quite sure what to say to that, so you said:

“How about that story?” 

“How about that story?” asked the Cat. 

“Well, would you very kindly mind telling it?” 

“There are many stories,” said the Cat enigmatically, “within my Cheshire House. Won’t you come in and see?” So you did. You came in, and you looked, and you saw, and there were all the stories, hanging there suspended in space like brilliant, glittering jewels, shining, sparkling in the morning light, and in you came, you weary traveller from parts unknown, and you took the chocolate egg that the Cat had very kindly passed you, and the stories you saw! Stories of Archons and Abraytha and Everywhere, of Lotto and Lords and Luca, of SAM and Shamblers and Zadellin, of worlds beyond your wildest dreams, and in you went, into a whole new world of adventure.

And the Cheshire Cat faded away behind you just as if he had never been there.

The Shamblers from the Stars were created by Robert Bloch and are now in the public domain.

The Cheshire Cat was created by Lewis Carroll and is now in the public domain.

Lotto, Luca, SAM © Elodie Christian

Abraytha Janus Colefia © Ostara Gale

The Zadellin crew © Theta Mandel

Archons © Aristide Twain

[windupnamazu]

i can't sit idly (no, i can't move at all)

ffxivwrite2023 #15: portentous of or like a portent: a sign or warning that something, especially something momentous or calamitous, is likely to happen.  

Lunya/G'raha. Pastoral AU. 582wc. ⮞ Some people hear a scream in the middle of the night and close their curtains. G'raha runs toward it.

The moon hung full over Corvos that night, drenching the summer meadows and their sprawling patches of daffodils in silver light and casting long, deep shadows where it could not reach.

G'raha fiddled with the latch of his hut, uncertain why he was so on edge. It wasn't his first summer in the pastures and it would not be his last for many more years to come, and with experience came a quiet sort of calm that eluded him this time when it had never before. Out in the field his flock was quiet as they slept under the watchful eye of his loyal sheepdog, Lyna, and the only sound was the gentle whistle of the wind through the ash trees.

Before he could fasten the lock and retire to bed to shove the strange anxiety hanging at the back of his mind away, a scream broke the peace of the night.

Immediately he was back out the door, crook in hand and barking a command for Lyna to keep watch. He tore through the thicket, lantern swinging as he tumbled down the slope towards Elftrudis's pastures with a healing spell already on his tongue.

He found her on the ground, panicked but otherwise unharmed as her own guardian dog circled her flock, hackles raised. In the pale moonlight that drifted between the trees into her section of the meadows there laid a giant direwolf, its hulking body split in twain, and standing above it…

A woman—one he'd met once before in these very same meadows. Lalafellin, possessed of moon-white hair in silken plaits and eyes of twilight flecked with crystal, skin brown as sugar and dotted with white freckles like the myriad stars overhead, impossibly beautiful in a way that made her seem not of this world. She stood over the corpse of the wolf five times her size as it bled out into the soil, cradling a lamb in one arm and in the other the arm of a scythe as tall as she was, formed of aetherial light rather than steel and dripping ichor. Two hounds flanked her on either side; the first a mutt that was nearly invisible in the dark with its pitch black fur and the second an Ala Mhigan hound with golden fur and piercing blue eyes.

When last he saw her, the very first time, she was a traveler who misheard his kulning cry as one in need of help and came wandering from the treeline like one of his flock at sundown. She warned him the pastures were dangerous at night and he laughed it off, having spent more than half his lifetime slogging through the wetlands in the pitch dark. Back then, she seemed eccentric but no more than he was and he found himself charmed by her open-bite smile and the wit with which she bantered with him until he had to return to his hut. At worst, she was a little misinformed but clearly well-intentioned. But before there weren't wolves of this size. Before, she hadn't had the scythe.

"What are you, Lunya?" he wondered, mouth dry.

"Me?" the girl asked with a voice like bells, luminous and intensely strange beneath the moonlight. She smiled toothily at him; her canines were sharp, fanglike. A bracing wind tore through the meadow and rattled the daffodils at their feet, sending her braids rippling in waves that revealed a pair of wolf tooth earrings hanging from her softly pointed ears. "I'm an omen."

[once-was-muses]

Muses' Speaking and Singing Voiceclaims

[ Because while most are their faceclaims, some are not ]

Antonio da Vinci

Speaking: his faceclaim (Riccardo Scamarcio)

Singing: ditto

The Artist

Speaking: Daniela Vega

Singing: ditto

The Blight

Speaking: his faceclaim (Ewan McGregor, but accent is thicker lol)

Singing: ditto

Bookworm

Speaking: his faceclaim (Anthony Rapp)

Singing: ditto

Candyman

Speaking: his faceclaim (Tony Todd)

Singing: Guy Davis

Claudette Morel

Speaking: her faceclaim (Mouna Traoré)

Singing: Etta James

The Doctor

Speaking: Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Singing: ditto

The Dredge

Speaking: Satan from The Adventures of Mark Twain

Singing: The Civil Wars (both of them)

Goswin

Speaking: his faceclaim (Peter Cushing)

Singing: ditto

Habeas Corpus

Speaking: Aurelio Voltaire

Singing: ditto

The Ichor

Speaking: Nikos Vertis

Singing: ditto

March Harriet

Speaking: her faceclaim (Kate McKinnon)

Singing: ditto

Rorschach

Speaking: his faceclaim (Jackie Earle Haley)

Singing: older Leonard Cohen

Saint Walker

Speaking: his faceclaim (Doug Jones)

Singing: ditto

Salaak

Speaking: his faceclaim (Ben Daniels)

Singing: Ian McCulloch

Scarecrow

Speaking: his faceclaim (Cillian Murphy)

Singing: a mix between David Lamb and Brett Sparks

The Spirit

Speaking: her faceclaim (Tao Okamoto)

Singing: ditto

Thoth

Speaking: their faceclaim (Stromae, without the accent)

Singing: ditto

The Wraith

Speaking: Brymo (volume warning for the intro)

Singing: ditto

[annemariewrites]

List of all the books I’ve read

just wanted to keep a list of what I’ve read throughout my life (that I can remember)

Fiction:

“The Outsiders,” SE Hinton

“The Weirdo,” Theodore Taylor

“The Devil’s Arithmetic,” Jane Yolen

“Julie of the Wolves series,” Jean Craighead George

“Soft Rain,” Cornelia Cornelissen

“Island of the Blue Dolphins,” Scott O’Dell

“The Twilight series,” Stephanie Mayer

“To Kill a Mockingbird,” Harper Lee

“Gamer Girl,” Mari Mancusi

“Redwall / Mossflower / Mattimeo / Mariel of Redwall,” Brian Jacques

“1984,” and  “Animal Farm,” George Orwell

“Killing Mr. Griffin,” Lois Duncan

“Huckleberry Finn,” Mark Twain

“Rainbow’s End,” Irene Hannon

“Cold Mountain,” Charles Frazier

“Between Shades of Gray,” Ruta Sepetys

“Great Short Works of Edgar Allan Poe,” Edgar Allen Poe

“Lord of the Flies,” William Golding

“The Great Gatsby,” F Scott Fitzgerald

“The Harry Potter series,” JK Rowling

“The Fault in Our Stars,” “Looking for Alaska,” and “Paper Towns,” John Green

“Thirteen Reasons Why,” Jay Asher

“The Hunger Games series,” Suzanne Collins

“The Perks of Being a Wallflower,” Stephen Chbosky

“Fifty Shades of Grey,” EL James

“Speak,” and “Wintergirls,” Laurie Halse Anderson

“The Handmaid’s Tale,” Margaret Atwood

“Mama Day,” Gloria Naylor

“Jane Eyre,” Charlotte Bronte

“Wide Sargasso Sea,” Jean Rhys

“The Haunting of Hill House,” Shirley Jackson

“The Chosen,” Chaim Potok

“Leaves of Grass,” Walt Whitman

“Till We Have Faces,” CS Lewis

“One Foot in Eden,” Ron Rash

“Jim the Boy,” Tony Earley

“The Vanishing Act of Esme Lennox,” Maggie O’Farrell

“A Land More Kind Than Home,” Wiley Cash

“A Parchment of Leaves,” Silas House

“Beowulf,” Seamus Heaney

“The Silence of the Lambs / Red Dragon / Hannibal / Hannibal Rinsing,” Thomas Harris

“Cry the Beloved Country,” Alan Paton

“Moby Dick,” Herman Melville

“The Hobbit / The Lord of the Rings trilogy / The Silmarillion,” JRR Tolkien

“Beren and Luthien,” JRR Tolkien, edited by Christopher Tolkien

“Children of Blood and Bone / Children of Virtue and Vengeance,” Tomi Adeyemi

“Soundless,” Richelle Mead

“The Girl with the Louding Voice,” Abi Dare

“A Song of Ice and Fire series / Fire and Blood,” GRR Martin

“A Separate Peace,” John Knowles

“The Bluest Eye,” and “Beloved,” Toni Morrison

“Brave New World,” Aldous Huxley

“The Giver / Gathering Blue / Messenger / Son,” Lois Lowry

“The Ivory Carver trilogy,” Sue Harrison

“The Grapes of Wrath,” and “Of Mice and Men,” John Steinbeck

“The God of Small Things,” Arundhati Roy

“Fahrenheit 451,” Ray Bradbury

“The Night Circus,” Erin Morgenstern

“Sunflower Dog,” Kevin Winchester

“The Catcher in the Rye,” JD Salinger

“The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian,” Sherman Alexie

“The Good Girl,” Mary Kubica 

“The Last Unicorn,” Peter S Beagle

“Slaughterhouse Five,” Kurt Vonnegut Jr

“The Joy Luck Club,” Amy Tan

“The Sworn Virgin,” Kristopher Dukes

“The Color Purple,” Alice Walker

“Their Eyes Were Watching God,” Zora Neale Hurston

“The Light Between Oceans,” ML Stedman

“Yellowface,” RF Kuang

“A Flicker in the Dark,” Stacy Willingham

“One Piece Novel: Ace’s Story,” Sho Hinata

Non-fiction:

“Anne Frank: Diary of a Young Girl,” Anne Frank

“Night,” Elie Wiesel

“Invisible Sisters,” Jessica Handler

“I Am Malala,” Malala Yousafzai

“The Interesting Narrative,” Olaudah Equiano

“The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks,” Rebecca Skloot

“Incidents in the Life of a Slave Girl,” Harriet Jacobs

“The Princess Diarist,” Carrie Fisher

“Adulting: How to Become a Grown Up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps,” Kelly Williams Brown

“How to Win Friends and Influence People,” Dale Carnegie

“Carrie Fisher: a Life on the Edge,” Sheila Weller

“Make ‘Em Laugh,” Debbie Reynolds and Dorian Hannaway

“How to be an Anti-Racist,” Ibram X Kendi

“Maus,” Art Spiegelman

“I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings,” Maya Angelou

“Wise Gals: the Spies Who Built the CIA and Changed the Future of Espionage,” Nathalia Holt

“Persepolis,” and “Persepolis II,” Marjane Satrapi

“How to Write a Novel,” Manuel Komroff

“The Nazi Genocide of the Roma,” Anton Weiss-Wendt

“Children of the Flames: Dr. Josef Mengele and the Untold Story of the Twins of Auschwitz,” Lucette Matalon Lagnado and Sheila Cohn Dekel

[crackinglamb]

Currently Doing...

Tagged by @demarogue, thank you!

Currently Reading: A bunch of fic. I haven't consumed New Media(tm) of any kind in a long time. No room. Most recent fics include In Twain (by CatC) and Ouroboros (by @mogwaei).

Last Song: Some VNV Nation in the car with Lamb the Younger.

Last Movie: Uh...Hmm. I honestly don't remember.

Working On: An exchange, a couple longfics, Fluff-uary.

Tagging @ir0n-angel, @lilbittymonster, @autodiscothings, @shretl, @mogwaei and @serial-chillr. No pressure!

[profgandalf]

Raging at the Wind: Contemporary Censors of Texts Created by Others

In the second paragraph of Dickens’ “A Christmas Carol,” the narrator stops to play with the idea that although the phrase “dead as a doornail” is immediately and so broadly recognized that it borders on being cliché, and that he thinks “dead as a coffin nail” would be more fresh and accurate, he finishes by observing that “the wisdom of our ancestors is in the simile, and my unhallowed hands shall not disturb it” (Carol 1).

Well, this is the generation of those with “unhallowed hands.”  I have written before about my dismay concerning the decision to remove various books or illustrations by Dr. Seuss. Specifically “And to Think That I Saw it on Mulberry Street” which wonderfully portrays a child’s imagination let loose, and was told by some on this platform that it was all well and good. Now, however, I suppose most of you know that Roald Dahl’s children’s books "James and the Giant Peach," "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," "Witches," and "Charlie and the Glass Elevator" are being rewritten to remove language deemed offensive by the publisher Puffin. (Penguin, the parent company, has indicated they are going to publish uncensored versions as if that makes things better). 

Meanwhile, Alan Gribben a professor at Auburn University has an edition of Huck Finn in which he removes the N-word as well as Injun and replaced them with “slave” and “Indian.“  And now I understand that according to a new report in "The Sunday Telegraph," new editions of Ian Fleming’s original James Bond novels will omit offensive passages when released this spring by Ian Fleming Publications.  And like Dr. Seuss, it’s the people who control the text who are doing this so they can get away with it legally.  My comment to all of these second-rate unimaginative pariahs is "keep your lousy, “unhallowed hands” off other people’s art!" 

Would Dahl care?  Of course, he would!  Dahl was notorious for fighting editors over his word choices, but he’s gone now and the foundation can do what it likes.  My impotent fury on his behalf feels like raging at the wind.  Only in this age is the writer faced with the possibility that his actual text, never mind film interpretations of it, might be altered by people who no more understand the creative process nor have any ability to shape imaginative text than deep sea-lantern fish understand the nature of sunscreen. 

Publishers should NOT have the right to alter an author's intended words because they can.  Even if it is legal: It’s wrong, and if I ever become a published author I am going to include in my contract that NO such alterations can ever be made by my publishers or my offspring no matter how many generations pass.  Dickens didn’t think of this because he couldn’t imagine it.  Congrats you woke folk, you’ve created a whole new clause in contracts!

At least when the Victorians Charles and Mary Lamb rewrote the stories of Shakespeare they called it “Tales from Shakespeare: Designed for the Use of Young Persons” And perhaps one could claim that these Dahl, Twain, and Seuss books are intended to protect children who need protecting. I think that is an error and would suggest just finding an alternative author. However with the censoring of Ian Fleming’s adult spy novels, the pernicious nature of these so-called editors are revealed.  It’s almost amusing.  Rather than accept the fundamental fact that different ages have different ways of thinking (which is part of the benefit of reading literature) and that the artist’s vision is sacred, they now insist that everyone see things as they do, and if authors take is not 100% acceptable, then their works are just altered to do so.  It’s like putting a pair of briefs on Michelangelo’s “David.” 

Years ago Christians were accused of being closed-minded censors. A lot of parents got upset with the novel “The Catcher in the Rye” and a lot of liberals had a good laugh at their expense.  But no Christian parent suggested that the F word be removed from J.D. Salenger’s book while keeping his name on the cover!  Final thought: Write your own damn books and leaves those written by masters alone.  If you're so wise and clever, write your own books!

[deathlessathanasia]

Momus. You praise lucidity, Apollo; your theory is excellent, though your practice does not quite conform; your oracles are crooked and enigmatic, and generally rely upon a safe ambiguity; a second prophet is required to say what they mean. But what is your solution of the problem? How are we to cure Timocles of the impediment in his speech?

Apollo. If possible, we should provide him with an able counsel (there are plenty such) to be inspired by him and give adequate expression to his ideas.

Momus. Your sapience is beardless indeed — in statu pupillari, one may say. A learned gathering: Timocles with counsel by his side to interpret his ideas. Damis speaking in propria persona with his own tongue, his opponent employing a go-between into whose ears he privately pours inspiration, and the go-between producing ornate periods, without, I dare say, understanding what he is told — most entertaining for the listeners! We shall get nothing out of that device. But, reverend sir, you claim the gift of prophecy, and it has brought you in good pay — golden ingots on one occasion?— why not seize this opportunity of exhibiting your art? You might tell us which of the disputants will win; a prophet knows the future, of course.

Apollo. I have no tripod or incense here; no substitute for the divining-well of Castaly.

Momus. Aha! you are caught! you will not come to the scratch.

Zeus. Speak, my son, in spite of all; give not this enemy occasion to blaspheme; let him not flout thy powers with tripod and water and frankincense, as though thine art were lost without them.

Apollo. Father, it were better done at Delphi or at Colophon, with all the customary instruments to hand. Yet, bare and unprovided as I am, I will essay to tell whether of them twain shall prevail.— If the metre is a little rough, you must make allowances.

Momus. Go on, then; but remember, Apollo: lucidity; no ‘able counsel,’ no solutions that want solving themselves. It is not a question of lamb and tortoise boiling in Lydia now; you know what we want to get at.

Zeus. What will thine utterance be? How dread, even now, is the making ready! The altered hue, the rolling eyes, the floating locks, the frenzied gesture — all is possession, horror, mystery.

Apollo. Who lists may hear Apollo’s soothfast rede Of stiff debate, heroic challenge ringing Shrill, and each headpiece lined with fence of proof. Alternate clack the strokes in whirling strife; Sore buffeted, quakes and shivers heart of oak. But when grasshopper feels the vulture’s talons, Then the storm-boding ravens croak their last, Prevail the mules, butts his swift foals the ass.

Zeus. Why that ribald laughter, Momus? It is no laughing matter. Stop, stop, fool; you’ll choke yourself.

Momus. Well, such a clear simple oracle puts one in spirits.

Zeus. Indeed? Then perhaps you will kindly expound it.

Momus. No need of a Themistocles this time; it is absolutely plain. The oracle just says in so many words that he is a quack, and we pack-asses (quite true) and mules to believe in him; we have not as much sense, it adds, as a grasshopper.

Lucian, Zeus Tragoedus

[who-is-muses]

Muses' Speaking and Singing Voiceclaims

[ Because while most are their faceclaims, some are not ]

Antonio da Vinci

Speaking: his faceclaim (Riccardo Scamarcio)

Singing: ditto

The Artist

Speaking: Daniela Vega

Singing: ditto

The Blight

Speaking: his faceclaim (Ewan McGregor, but accent is thicker lol)

Singing: ditto

Bookworm

Speaking: his faceclaim (Anthony Rapp)

Singing: ditto

Candyman

Speaking: his faceclaim (Tony Todd)

Singing: Guy Davis

Claudette Morel

Speaking: her faceclaim (Mouna Traoré)

Singing: Etta James

The Doctor

Speaking: Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Singing: ditto

The Dredge

Speaking: Satan from The Adventures of Mark Twain

Singing: The Civil Wars (both of them)

Goswin

Speaking: his faceclaim (Peter Cushing)

Singing: ditto

Habeas Corpus

Speaking: Aurelio Voltaire

Singing: ditto

The Ichor

Speaking: Nikos Vertis

Singing: ditto

March Harriet

Speaking: her faceclaim (Kate McKinnon)

Singing: ditto

Rorschach

Speaking: his faceclaim (Jackie Earle Haley)

Singing: older Leonard Cohen

Saint Walker

Speaking: his faceclaim (Doug Jones)

Singing: ditto

Salaak

Speaking: his faceclaim (Ben Daniels)

Singing: Ian McCulloch

Scarecrow

Speaking: his faceclaim (Cillian Murphy)

Singing: a mix between David Lamb and Brett Sparks

The Spirit

Speaking: her faceclaim (Tao Okamoto)

Singing: ditto

Thoth

Speaking: their faceclaim (Stromae, with varying accents)

Singing: ditto

The Wraith

Speaking: Brymo (volume warning for the intro)

Singing: ditto

[ralucasalmostgone]

I'll explain the logic behind it...

See this?

This is Shania Twain (Shh TWIN); The Twin being the Lamb

Now...I used a gender swapping app...

that would almost look like Tom Cruise...if not for the fact that I also changed his nose and features to fit Andreea instead

and if you eliminate the gigantic square-like jawline...

and replace it with something more triangular...

[beezleweezle]

did forty-twelve tree stumps under stew-rock twain did meet. *squats*

ihhh tas squats which former-momma did 🤝🤝 twelve-FORTY lambs which laid.

thank you.

[wednesdayshadow]

On reading

"All things are ready, if our mind be so"

I was a voracious reader from about the age of 5. I am now 60. I was the kid that got in trouble in school for reading books instead of the one who was always talking. I read anything and EVERYTHING I could get my hands on. I kept reading as I grew, my tastes in reading material ever changing. When I was in junior high and high school, I tried my hand at writing like most young girls. I was not bad but clearly not professional writer material. So, I continued to read. I had moved on from the stories of Clara Barton, Little House on the Prairie and later Flowers in the Attic to Issac Asimov, Ray Bradbury, Steven King, Shakespeare, Jane Austin, Charlotte Bronte, Mark Twain, etc.….

Then, I discovered what I had a knack for. Each story, each sentence, each word; I could SEE it played out in my mind! I could see Calpurnia whispering to Scout so as not to be overheard; admonishing her, “There’s some folks who don’t eat like us, she whispered fiercely, but you ain’t called on to contradict ‘em at the table when they don’t. That boy’s yo’ comp’ny and if he wants to eat up the tablecloth you let him, you hear?”

Before Sissy Spacek embodied her in a movie, I had my own vision of what Carrie looked like due to the authors vivid account she was a frog among the swans, slightly chunky, with pimples at the corners of her mouth and mousy blonde hair, and could FEEL her anguish and torment when she was thinking about her tormentors, “If only it would be today and Jesus coming not with a lamb and a shepherd’s crook, but with a boulder in each hand to crush the laughers and the snickerers, to root out the evil and destroy it screaming—a terrible Jesus of blood and righteousness.”

And the very first time I read the line, ''In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort. '', I could SEE the opening offering comfort and could feel the love emanating from within.

I learned that the answer to life, the universe, and everything is 42!

I learned that The Endless are a family of beings that represent the forces they symbolize:  Destiny, Death, Dream, Desire, the twins Despair and Delirium, and ALL the magical and wonderous things surrounding them and their powers. They were akin to Greek Gods.

I cannot write professionally, but I can, and do APPRECIATE, I absolutely LOSE myself, I LOVE each and every story. I hold dear the writers that provided me with such adventures and joy. I wish I could give them all the love that I feel I’ve received from their imaginations. So, I continue to read, re-read and enjoy their talented minds, imaginations and love for their readers. Thank you to the writers, magicians, conjurers of delight! Thank you.

SF