#We got out of it and my stepdad was like 'are we supposed to think he's a good person now cause of that ending?'

[maeamian]

Saw Ferrari on Christmas as part of our ongoing tradition of being not at the big tiring family gathering the whole day, and I gotta say if you're thinking of seeing that one: don't fuckin bother. The story is unsatisfying, the acting is solid but lacking, the action is impossible to follow because the main rival to Ferrari is Maserati and they both use Italian Racing Red so you gotta memorize the car numbers if you want any sense of the race, the main character is deeply unlikable and his character arc is literally nonexistent: he shows no growth whatsoever over the course of the movie, the cinematography is the visual equivalent to a picture book for five year olds of all the shots there were like two that were at all interesting, and the ending is deeply unmotivated like who even fucking cares?

[mochinomnoms]

Thinking about the Tweels parents reacted to them bringing home a partner, think of how excited mama Ashengrotto will be when Azul brings home his mate. After seeing Azul alone, depressed, and self-loathing for so many years, seeing him have the confidence to bring home his mate. If he is in his Merform she is even more thrilled. When she sees them comfort and hug him and allows Azul to cling to them she may faint. If/when they get married, you know she is throwing the biggest wedding reception in her restaurant. Yuu’s dress or tux, completely covered no matter the cost, all food, covered. She is just happy that her son found someone and Mr. Ashengrotto has to hold her back and keep her from squeezing Yuu to tight out of joy. She would also drop hints that she would be a great grandma and show you how cute Azul was in all his baby pictures.

Azul would probably die of embarrassment when his mom shows baby pictures and when they are finally alone (thanks to Azul’s Stepdad reminding her she has a Business to take care of) he finally relents:

“I’m sorry, she is just excited to meet you,” Azul has yuu curled in his many arms inside his octopot.

“Is she the reason you waited so long to introduce me to your parents?”

“Yes… also she has three books full of photos hidden in the house I can’t find and my step-father won’t tell me where they are. They just appear when guest come over and disappear when I try to burn them later.”

“Well, we are meeting your Grandma tomorrow so things should be better there!”

Azul groaned.

“More picture books?”

“Six books. I have no clue how she got half of those photos, I think she hired the tweels behind my back!”

She's so happy upon learning about Azul's partner. Ms Iris Ashengrotto is a sweet woman whose restaurant started from the bottom to become a renounced, exclusive dining experience that only the most wealthy, prim and proper folks under the sea could have the privilege of eating. It's why the Ashengrottos and the Leech family have worked together for so long, it makes a fine establishment for their… “business” deals. She's what we would equate to Gordon Ramsay, really: no-nonsense, with strict and high expectations in her kitchen. Similarly, she is oh so sweet with children, her own especially.

So it was a pain to watch Azul grow up so lonely, though she could never get him to tell her why. Iris assumed that it was due to bullying, most merfolk are not kind to cecaelias, but she couldn't go off and scare random children into not interacting with her son. Nor could she talk to their parents without knowing for sure if that was the case, or if her son was just naturally shy. It didn't help her worries when her son got skinner and skinner, thinking she didn't notice him look at his body in the mirror as he poked and prodded at what little fat remained on him.

She took comfort when the Leech parents sent their twins off to keep Azul company, though he didn't seem to warm up to them for quite some time. Even when he went to NRC with the twins, opening his own establishment, Iris was still concerned about him making friends. It's why she was so pleasantly surprised to hear from her son during his second year about his partner. He's shyly gushing about you to him, a magicless human that slithered their way into his locked up heart. With the way he describes you, like you hung the moon and starts, she's already planning a wedding in her head.

It takes some nudging after that to get him to bring you for a visit, but he eventually did over the summer break. Oh, she was delighted to see his limbs unconsciously curl around you, holding you close as you curled into him yourself. You were so cute! A sweetheart! A delight! A perfect child-in-law! Azul, please forgive her if she starts sobbing, but how else is a mother supposed to react when she sees her child gaze at someone with so much love in their heart?

The first day she's monopolized your time, feeding you and Azul all sorts of food and snacks, offhandedly mentioning that the two of you would have to fatten up a bit to give her health grandchildren. She had to withhold a laugh at Azul's mortified expression. Iris has several albums of baby and childhood pictures, eager to coo over how cute and chubby Azul was as a baby. Her son is sulking at the other end of the couch, but he still has a tentacle curled around your ankle, never leaving you for long.

It's when she's hiding away her album (one of three, Azul's destroyed many be she always has spares), that she overhears your conversation. Iris had stopped by his bedroom to let you two know that she needed to return to the restaurant, but instead quietly delighted at the sight of you two in his octopot. A cecaelia's octopot, hiding place, is a very private and intimate place. So seeing you, cradled in Azul's lap, as his many arms hold you close to him, makes her heart swell.

She decides to leave you two alone, taking one last peek as you giggle at a pouting Azul, before sharing a soft kiss. Iris is smiling at the sight, sighing as she can finally relax, knowing her son is going to be taken care of.

[becca-e-barnes]

Imagine being stepdad Bucky’s dirty little secret😩🤫

I've been listening to 'Bad Man' by FIGHTMASTER and it's inspired some filthy fantasies that would fit stepdad Bucky perfectly 🤤

I have so much I'd like to talk about but I'll start with how hot it would be to have him catch you playing with a toy when you think no one is home. Especially if you'd already been sleeping together but maybe you decided to stop when you got a new boyfriend.

You were so sure the house was empty, you didn't even think twice about slipping your vibrator from it's hiding spot. With your earphones in, you hadn't heard the footsteps down the hallway towards your bedroom. You didn't notice that your door wasn't closed tight either. All that mattered was the delightful buzzing of the toy against your clit, your hand squeezing your own breasts and the flithy thoughts that inspired you to touch yourself.

Fuck, this was a show for Bucky. He hadn't meant to invade your privacy but he wasn't quite sure how to look away. The memory of you writhing in pleasure kept him up at night but now he's getting to see it up close again.

"You really ought to close your door if you're going to do that, sweetheart." You miss the first half of what he said because you weren't able to take your earphones out fast enough, choosing instead to cover yourself.

Bucky only rolls his eyes. "No point covering up, honey. Did you forget I've kissed, licked or bitten pretty much every inch of you already?" There's an overwhelming cockiness in his tone and it makes knots twist in your stomach.

"Look, if that new guy you're dating can't take care of you, you only had to tell me." He steps inside and closes the door behind him and you swear he hasn't taken his eyes off you yet. "I'm not surprised he's not enough for you. I bet he's selfish, isn't he. He doesn't think about you. He won't take the time to learn what you like. He can't make your thighs shake the way I do."

His stare is intense but when you look away, he catches under your chin with two fingers, redirecting your line of sight back to him.

"You don't need to be shy." His voice is soothing, his hand creeping under the sheets and you don't make any effort to stop him from finding what he's looking for. He trails his fingers up your thigh, groaning softly when his fingertips reach the slick, messy folds of your sex.

"We shouldn't do this..." You protest feebly but that only makes him laugh.

"You're right. We shouldn't. So tell me why you're grinding yourself against my fingers like you're in heat." It's humiliating but he's got a point. "If he's not taking care of you, I'll have to remind you how sex is supposed to feel." Two of his thick, long fingers glide into your eager body and you feel him hook them inside you exactly how you always loved.

"You don't know how many times I've stroked my cock and tried to remember exactly what this little cunt feels like. I’ve tried to remember the way you squeeze me when you're cumming. Nothing feels like you do. Your body is a fucking luxury." He's losing his self control far faster than he wants to.

"Get on your hands and knees." It's an order you only start to respond to when he slips his fingers out of you and you reposition yourself in front of him. He tugs his zipper down, freeing himself from his underwear, giving his cock a few firm strokes before lining it up with your entrance.

"Oh sweetheart, it's been a while." He groans, pressing just the tip into you at first.

"Feels so fucking good." You babble, pressing yourself back on him, encouraging him to inch into your body. You haven't felt this blissed out in months and he's only getting started. You knew this wouldn't last. There was no way you'd be able to turn down the one man who truly knows your body. He understands your needs in a way no one else has ever even tried to. Maybe it's the age difference or the extra experience he's got but this man really understands your pleasure.

"Fuck, it does, doesn't it?" He laughs, pressing the rest of the way into you and giving you a couple of sharp, half thrusts.

It's not long before he's established a good rhythm, his cock slipping in and out of you while he reaches around you to rub your clit. You feel him kissing the back of your neck, groaning against your skin that he missed your body, up until a faint buzzing sound makes him pause.

At first you'd thought your vibrator switched back on but then you notice your phone screen illuminated on the sheets beside you and your boyfriend's face filling the screen.

"Answer it." Bucky demands, resuming his thrusts at the same pace as before. "I want you to answer it. Tell him what we're doing. Or hide it from him. It's up to you."

[padawansuggest]

Cody: -and what can I do to repay your kindness… for… the poison? *having just asked a witch in the forest to give him something that will get rid of his landlord’s abusive husband that isn’t traceable to him or her*

Obi-Wan: *tapping his chin in thought* your firstborn child, I suppose?

Cody: I’m… infertile.

Obi-Wan: Great! I can’t get pregnant anyways. I know of an orphanage nearby though, we can check it out on our third date?

Cody: …why didn’t you just ask to go on a date with me?

Obi-Wan: I’m already planning to pursue that, I just wanted to test the waters and see if you were interested in kids.

Cody: Ohhhh, okay, yeah, I want kids. I have like twelve siblings, twenty-three cousins, and as an adult they are starting to reproduce on their own, I totally want a huge family.

Obi-Wan: *blushing* How huge?

Cody: *shrugs* I mean, I’m twenty five, I could totally beat my dad’s record if we start adopting soon. My older uncle works in the social system, he’ll get us in to visit the kids and see who fits. I’m thinking first date. Seeya this Friday, sweetheart!

Obi-Wan: *blushing super hard while Cody runs off to go poison a man, looking over to where Anakin and Ahsoka, his first adopted kids are hiding in a bush* Wtf just happened?

Anakin: *wheezing, tears leaking out* Oh my god, I think the firstborn rouse finally got you in over your head, oh my god, Soka, Soka, hold me I’m dying-

Ahsoka: *laughing just as hard* Oh my god, Ani, we have a stepdad!

[belongstochan-writingblog]

STEPDADDY CHAN

Warnings: detail smut, corruption kink, daddy and babygirl kink. Stepcest. Stepdad Chan. 

A/N: The reader is of age, (she's 18) she's just very innocent and loves to wear light pink clothes. 

Do not read if step-cest bothers you. 

Myla curls up on the couch in her stepdad's office as he works. She was in his office because she got in trouble at school. 

"Daddy?" Myla speaks softly causing Chan to groan inwardly and look up at his stepdaughter and give her a look. 

"Do you hate me now?" Myla asks meekly, Chan gets up and walks over to her on the couch and sits next to her wrapping his arm around her shoulder and he whispers softly "No, babygirl. I could never hate you. I'm just disappointed. I told you not to hang out with kids that go around and mess around with things that don't belong to them." 

Myla plays with her shirt before looking up at her stepdad and she whispers "I know and I'm sorry I just, they called me a good girl and made fun of my pink clothes and I told them that I like my clothes." 

Chan nods and plays with her short brown hair and whispers "Sweetie it's okay to be a good girl you know? I heard you telling uncle Felix that you hate it because it makes you feel unwanted by the cool kids, but sweetheart in 3 years or less those cool kids would most likely end up in jail or as the most wanted. I don't want you hanging out with them again." 

Myla nods and she whispers "Okay daddy, I promise."  

Chan nods and kisses her temple before pulling her into his lap and hugs her tightly. 

*One week later

"Daddy!" Myla yells happily as she runs into the house after school and runs into the living room but stops when she sees her stepdad and Felix along with Minho and Jeongin. 

Her uncles but also her teachers.

Myla becomes anxious, why were three of her teachers at her house? 

 Myla looks at Chan who is currently staring at her with a disappointed look and he stands up and walks over to her with a cold expression. 

"Myla I'm only going to ask you this once but where were you today when you were supposed to be in Minho's classroom?" Chan asks Myla, his tone firm. 

Myla bites her lip and looks down at her feet, her shoes becoming more interesting than anything else right now. 

"I was in the bathroom daddy." Myla says softly before looking back up at him. 

Chan scoffs as he speaks "Minho said he had another student check in on you and you weren't there, tell me the truth Myla." 

Myla glances at her teachers to see them not paying attention but she knew they were listening, she looks back at Chan and she whispers "Daddy can we talk about this alone please?" 

Chan glances at his best friends before looking back at his sweet stepdaughter and he lets out a deep sigh before saying softly "No, they need to know as well."

Myla whimpers when he says that and she stands on her tippy toes and holds onto Chan's shoulder and whispers "A boy locked in the closet and kissed me." 

Chan shivers from how close Myla was to him but when she says those words he freezes before growling angrily before shouting "You let another boy kiss you?!" 

Myla tears up when he shouts and she nods before whimpering loudly "It just happened daddy." 

Chan shakes his head and says "No, no, nope. Oh hell no. Babygirl you shouldn't be kissing any boys!" 

Myla bites her lip, she glances at her teachers to see them looking at them now, she looks at Chan with tears in her eyes and she whispers "I'm sorry daddy, I just wanted to know what it was like." 

"You could've come to me! You could've asked me!" Chan says loudly. 

Myla whimpers more and she whispers "I know daddy, I just didn't think." 

Chan growls in frustration before pointing to the stairs "Go to your room, I'm very disappointed in you Myla, tomorrow when you go back to school you'll need to get your missing work and lessons from Minho." 

Myla whimpers and runs up to her room and jumps into her bed and cries into her pink pillows. 

Chan sighs as he sits next to Minho and Felix asks "You still haven't done anything with her?" 

Chan blushes and looks away before clearing his throat and he whispers "I don't want her to hate me if something goes wrong, Felix." 

Felix hums and nods before speaking softly "I felt the same way with Ava, but when we did it all she did was cling to me and kiss me and ask to go again." 

Chan chuckles and says "I don't think Myla would do that, I'm scared she'll cry and say I've hurted her." 

Minho hums and says "She really is innocent, the other day a boy kept asking her out and she didn't know what he meant." 

Chan blushes and says "I'll go up and talk to her later, Jeongin how are you and your stepdaughter doing?" 

Jeongin blushes and says "She clings to me whenever she sees me. She is so cute." 

Felix chuckles before looking at Chan and says "How long has it been for you?" 

Chan blushes and explains "Well after Myla's mom died I haven't gotten any." 

Felix hums and says "Have you masturbated at all?" Chan nods and says "Yeah, I steal Myla's panties and just think of her." 

Felix nods and says "Maybe when you talk to her tonight, you can kiss her or something and see how it goes?" 

Chan nods and says softly "Yeah I can do that." Minho hums and says "When did you fall in love with Myla?" Chan whistles and answers softly "I've been in love with her for a while now. I got married to her mom two years ago so she would've been 16? At that point I wasn't in love with her but it was definitely before her mother died." 

Minho nods before asking softly "Mari always flirted with me even when her mom was still alive. I didn't actually do anything with her until Mari's mom died, I guess you could say I was just waiting." 

Chan nods and says "I wouldn't have done anything with Myla either while her mom was still alive. " 

Felix hums and says "Hey Chan, maybe Ava and Myla can have a play date." Chan nods and says "Yeah you guys can come back next week." 

Later that night

Chan opens Myla's door to see her curled up on her bed playing with the pink wolf he got her a fews ago. 

Chan climbs into the bed causing Myla to look up at him and watch him when he comes and lays down in front of her and he gently strokes the wolf plushie's head. 

Myla bites her lip when Chan looks up at her and she whispers "I'm sorry daddy, I should've came to you about the kissing, but it wasn't something I exactly wanted, I pushed him away before running to Minho's classroom." 

Chan grows more upset about the fact that the boy kissed her against her will and he says softly "Daddy will take care of him." 

Myla nods before snuggling into Chan's chest, her chubby fingers gripping his shirt and she whispers "Daddy what's porn?" 

Chan jerks from the question, he was surprised by that and he answers honestly "It's an adult movie babygirl. It has many adult movies on it. Why? Where did you hear it from?"

Myla looks up at Chan and blushes shyly before answering "I heard it from a group of kids at school." Chan sighs softly and pushes Myla gently more into his side. 

Myla blushes and whispers softly "Do-do you think maybe we can watch one together?"  

Chan's breath hitches from the question and he gulps before whispering "Yeah babygirl, let's go to my room to watch it okay?" 

Myla nods and crawls off the bed before going to Chan's room. Chan pants as he feels his cock becoming hard in his sweats and follows after her. 

When he gets in his bedroom he finds Myla curled up on the side of the bed he normally sleeps on and he smiles before going to his TV and pulls off his porn DVD collection from the drawer and plops one in and he pushes play before joining Myla on his bed. 

Myla looks at him before snuggling into his side and wraps her arm around his waist. Chan hums softly as he trades shapes onto her skin softly as they both watch the movie. 

Myla gaps softly when she watches the guy rip clothes off of the woman and she whispers "Daddy, he is ripping her clothes." Chan nods and whispers softly "I know baby girl, keep watching." 

Myla watches the couple on TV kiss to the point they gasp for air, and then it shows the guy and the girl on bed, naked. 

Myla blushes as she watches the guy opens the girl's legs and stroke his lower part which causing Myla to frown and she gaps in worry when the guy pushes his lower part into the woman, she watches the woman's expression, she looks like she enjoys it but to Myla it looks painful. 

"Daddy?" Myla whispers and looks up at Chan who is already looking at her and he whispers softly "Yes little one?" 

Myla bites her lip and asks softly "What's the man's lower part called?" Chan brushes his thumb against her bottom lip to make it stop biting it and he whispers "It's a Penis baby." 

Myla blushes and she asks softly "Why did he push it into the woman?" Chan gulps, he knew it was for pleasure but he didn't want to tell her that so he tells her the way it should be "Because he loves her babygirl." 

Myla nods and shyly looks back at the TV before looking at Chan and whispers softly "It looks painful." 

Chan gently cups her face and watches her lean into his palm and he whispers softly "It can be babygirl, but not if the guy does it right but it always hurts at first sweetheart." 

Myla nods as she holds onto Chan's wrist as she asks him "Do you think maybe you could do what that man is doing to the woman?" 

Chan swore he felt his heart stop and he groans inwardly in pain as his cock starts to throb painfully in his sweats. 

Chan nods and whispers softly "Of course babygirl, daddy is the only one who can do it." 

Myla nods as helps Chan remove her clothes before helping him remove his clothes and she gaps in horror "Daddy you're huge! Is it even going to fit?" 

Chan chuckles and gently cups Myla's face and he whispers "Yes baby it'll fit." 

Myla nods and wraps her arms around Chan's neck as Chan gently lays her down on the bed and he groans loudly as his cock brushes against her wet folds, he reaches down and gently rubs her nub which causes Myla to whimper loudly under him and jerk a little "Daddy" she whispered and she yelps softly when he pushes his thumb against her nub.  

"Babygirl, you're so wet darling." Chan whispers as he starts to push his fingers inside of her which causes Myla's eyes to widen and arch her back "daddy!" She cries out. Chan groans and pulls his fingers, leaving a trail of wetness to follow. 

"Crap." Chan whispers, his cock by this tip had an angry red tip and he gently rubs his cock against her wet folds and he watches Myla's expressions as he starts to push inside of her, when she starts to whimper and tear up, Chan quickly slams his cock all the way in way which causes her to let out a small scream and grip his hair. 

"D-daddy it hurts." Myla whimpers and Chan gently shushes her and whispers "It'll feel better soon I promise baby." 

Myla whimpers and grips the back of his nap and pushes her legs up against his hips, panting under him. 

It didn't take long before the pain went away and Myla relaxed and she whispers "Okay daddy, you can move." 

Chan moans as he starts thrusting in and out of her, his hand finding the one of hers that's tangled in the sheet and he wraps their fingers together. 

Myla moans under Chan holding on to him by his hair, grips his hand as he keeps thrusting in and out of her, when he leans down and takes her nipple into his mouth she throws her head back and lets out a loud moan. 

"Oh my gosh! Daddy!" She cries out. Chan picks up the pace and moves his head up and he whispers "Such a good girl for me aren't you?" Myla nods and whimpers "always daddy, I'll always be good for you." 

Chan groans in pleasure as he thrusts faster as she cries out "Daddy I feel like I need to peep." Chan grunts and whispers "It's not peep, babygirl let it go." 

It didn't take long for Myla to cum around Chan's cock and it wasn't long after that she let him pull out and watched him cums into the bed sheets next to her. 

Myla pants softly as she lays more on her back relaxing, her legs still open, her hand on her stomach. 

"Baby?" Chan whispers. Myla hums sleepily and whispers "Yes daddy?" Chan chuckles softly before leaning down kissing her lips gently "Nothing baby get some rest." 

Myla nods and falls asleep immediately after that. 

Chan chuckles and gently cleans her up, and then himself, he throws the  rag into the trash before changing the sheets without waking her up, after he does that he climbs under the sheets and pulls the sheets over them as he nuzzles her face gently before falling asleep. 

Next morning 

Myla wakes up underneath Chan's body and she smiles as she snuggles into his warmth and she gently kisses his cheek. 

Chan hums and opens his eyes and smiles sweetly down at Myla and he whispers softly "I love you so much, babygirl." 

Myla blushes and plays with his hair and whispers "I love you so much too, daddy." 

[neon-lights-and-glitter]

Fight The Feeling- 6 You Don’t Owe Me An Apology

Summary- Urban comforts you after you found Jack sleeping with another girl, Jack tries to apologize to you, and you confess your true feelings about Jack to Urban.

Word Count- 2.1k

A/N- A little shorter then I wanted it to be, but I want the interview to be it’s own chapter, which I promise will actually be the next chapter this time.

When you walked out of the hotel room, you didn’t have a plan as much as you convinced Jack you did. If he knew you didn’t have a plan, he would have went after you and that’s what you were trying to avoid. You said what you said to show Jack that you felt like other people cared about you more than he did, in this case you were talking about Jack’s best friend.

As much as you didn’t want to involve Urban with your problems with Jack, you didn’t have much of a choice. Luckily you had found out what room Urban was staying in earlier in the day, so you walked until you ended up in front of his room. You sighed before you knocked on the door.

“Who is it?” Urban called out, looking towards the door.

“It’s Y/N” You said and Urban got up to open the door. Urban was about to say something as he opened the door but as soon as he saw you were crying, he stopped himself.

“Are you okay?” Urban asked, stepping out of the way to let you walk into the room. You shook your head no, Urban sighed softly. “What’s wrong?” He asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed, signaling for you to sit next to him. You put your stuff down before sitting down next to him. 

“Jack. That’s what’s wrong.” You said and Urban couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

“What did he do now?” Urban asked and you sighed.

“He lied to me again and he slept with someone else in the bed we slept in last night. He was so sweet to me last night and I was starting to think that he might be taking this whole situation seriously. Now I’m not sure and I hate him.” You said, crossing your arms like a child who just got told no. “He doesn’t owe me anything and I get that, but I just thought he would at least have the decency to not lie to me anymore or sleep with another girl in the bed I was supposed to sleep in tonight. Or if anything at least get better at hiding it because who knows how many times I’ve done it before.” You said, uncrossing your arms to wipe the tears from your eyes, smearing your makeup in the process, but you didn’t care.

“I’m sorry Jack’s such a dick.” Urban apologized and you pouted softly.

“He’s your best friend, you can’t call him a dick.” You said, defending Jack for some reason you couldn’t figure out.

“I can if he’s acting like a dick.” Urban said, making you laugh softly.

“It’s still not nice.” You said.

“I don’t care, he’s not being nice to you.” Urban said. “I know I’ve been his friend longer than I’ve been yours, but how he’s treating you isn’t right. You’re a really forgiving person, and I hate seeing you hurt again because of something stupid he did. You don’t deserve to be treated how Jack has treated you.” Urban sighed. “I know you have a lifetime commitment to him now, but you can’t always forgive everybody for everything they do.” Urban told you.

“Well, I told him if he’s changed his mind and doesn’t want to be involved with the baby, he doesn’t have to be. I don’t need anything from him, I’ve told him before that I can do this all on my own and I mean it.” You told Urban.

“He would never choose to not be a part of his child’s life” Urban said, and you sighed, looking down at your hands.

“That’s what I thought, but I don’t know anymore. He was so fucking excited last night, we were even talking about a gender reveal my friend wants to throw for us, but then today he goes and does this.” You explained.

“You know even if Jack chooses to not be involved, you don’t have to do anything alone, I would never let you.” Urban said and you nodded, hugging his side as he hugged you back.

“Thank you.” You smiled softly.

It wasn’t that Urban wanted to be the stepdad to his best friend’s child, but he wanted to be involved in his niece or nephews’ life and he wasn’t going to let Jack get in the way of that. Even though Urban didn’t have any intention of being in a relationship with you, maybe in some alternate universe you worked out as a couple, better then you and Jack did, but as much as you and Urban loved each other, you weren’t in love with each other. Urban did have a soft spot for you though. Your career, just like Jack’s, had really taken off over the year you two were together, so Urban saw you at your best moments, but also your worst moments that you would never tell anyone else about.

Jack saw those moments too of course. There were sometimes moments though where he was going through the best moments of his career at the time when you were going through one of the worst. You never wanted to bother Jack with that and bring his mood down, but Urban noticed and would comfort you when Jack couldn’t which bonded your relationship with Urban more then you could ever explain.

There were two things you would never regret about your relationship with Jack. Number one being your future child of course. Number two was your friendship with Urban. You often considered each other your platonic soulmate. 

“You can stay with me for the rest of the trip if you want to.” Urban offered and you nodded.

“I was hoping you’d offer so I didn’t have to ask.” You said and you both laughed softly. 

“You’re always welcome to stay with me.” Urban told you.

You and Urban hung out for the next couple hours, eventually leaving the hotel to get something for dinner even though it was getting late. Once you arrived back at the hotel, you heard your phone go off, sighing as you looked at it, throwing it on to the bed.

“Jack?” Urban asked and you nodded.

“Yeah. I can’t believe I have to do that fucking interview with him tomorrow.” You said.

“Does everybody on set know the situation?” Urban asked and you shook your head. 

“Nope, everybody thinks we’re together, and I doubt Claire will let me cancel it.” You said.

“You could always explain the situation and ask to delay it at least.” Urban suggested.

“Yeah, I doubt that. Not this close to the interview.” You said. “I should go grab the rest of my stuff from Jack’s room.”  You sighed.

“Want me to come with you?” Urban asked and you shook your head.

“No, I’ll be okay. I have to pretend to be in love with him tomorrow, I can handle seeing him for a couple minutes.” You told Urban and he nodded, grabbing his extra hotel key, and handing it to you.

“Figured this might be helpful.” Urban said, laughing softly.

“Thanks.” You said, grabbing your phone from the bed, putting both your phone and the hotel key in your pocket. “I’ll be back.” You told Urban before walking out of the room and back to the one you shared with Jack.

You sighed softly before unlocking and opening the door. As soon as Jack heard the door his head shot over to look at who was walking in. Jack let out a quiet sigh when he was it was you.

“Y/N, can we talk?” Jack asked quietly. You thought about ignoring him, you didn’t really want to talk to him, but you also didn’t want to be completely childish.

“No.” You told him, not looking in his direction as you grabbed some of your stuff that you had unpacked the night before and threw it back into your bag.

“Please?” Jack asked, and you sighed, finally looking over at him, making him hopeful you were going to let him talk.

“I don’t want to talk to you Jack. If I did, I wouldn’t have walked out in the first place.” You told him before putting your attention back to your stuff.

“I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking and I never meant to hurt you.” Jack said anyways.

“You just didn’t mean for me to find out.” You said before sighing. “You don’t owe me an apology. Truly, you don’t. We aren’t together.”

“But I want to apologize. I know we aren’t together, but that doesn’t make it right.” Jack explained. 

“Don’t tell me your sorry Jack, show me your sorry.” You told Jack. 

“I will, I promise.” Jack said and you sighed.

“You’ve broken promises before.” You told him, putting the last of your stuff into your bag.

“I won’t break this one.” Jack told you.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” You said and Jack nodded softly.

“I know I haven’t given you many reasons to believe me, but I never want to hurt you. I’ll make it up to you I promise.” Jack said.

“No, you haven’t. Like I said, I’ll believe it when I see it. I really want to forgive you, but it’s going to take time. Not just for last night, for everything.” You told Jack honestly and he nodded.

“I get it, I know it’s going to take time.” Jack said. “I take it you’re not staying here tonight?” Jack asked, looking down at your bag. 

“What gave you that idea?” You asked sarcastically, letting out a small laugh.

“Where are you staying?” Jack asked you.

“I’m staying with Urban. He said I could stay with him for the rest of the trip.” You said and Jack nodded as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

“I thought about what you said earlier. Did he tell you about the cheating?” Jack asked and you nodded softly, leaning on the dresser.

“Yeah, he did. I saw the texts first though. He just confirmed everything. It’s not his fault I found out, so please don’t be mad at Urban because of it.”

“I won’t he didn’t do anything, he was just trying to protect you, I can’t be mad at him for that.” Jack said. “Do you think we could ever be friends again?” Jack asked and you sighed.

“I don’t know Jack. We were doing really well, I was happy with our relationship before today. I know we aren’t together, but you sleeping with another girl behind my back really did hurt me. You’re free to do whatever you want, and maybe this is too much of me to ask, I don’t know, but I just don’t want us to keep secrets anymore. Especially when everyone thinks we’re together, what if she goes and tells everyone about us. I just don’t want to look stupid at the end of this.” You explained though you weren’t planning on forgiving Jack anytime soon.

“I’ll make sure if either of us look stupid when this is over, it’s me.” Jack joked, making you laugh slightly. “That’s not too much to ask, I won’t keep secrets anymore. I agree that we shouldn’t be keeping things from each other in the situation we are in.” Jack agreed with you.

Eventually you made your way back to Urban’s room, Jack insisting on helping you with your bags even though you said you didn’t need it before going back to his room.

You sat on the edge of the bed, scrolling through your phone, Urban sitting down next to you.

“Can I ask you something?” Urban asked, looking over at you as you set your phone down and looked over at Urban.

“Yeah of course, what is it?” You asked.

“Do you still love Jack?” Urban asked, you sighed before nodding slightly.

“I shouldn’t, I know I shouldn’t, but I can’t help it.” You said, your eyes starting to water. “I feel so stupid for loving him. Why do I love someone who’s cheated on me, and lied to me, multiple times? Especially when he doesn’t love me back, there’s no way he does. If he did love me back, he wouldn’t keep hurting me.” You said and Urban sighed as you started to cry again. He hugged you to comfort you the best he could.

“Sometimes you can’t help who you love.” Urban said, not wanting to tell you that Jack did love you, or at least he claimed to. “I know you two will figure everything out, even if you don’t get back together, it will all work out I promise.” Urban told you and you nodded slightly, even though you weren’t sure if you believed him because right now, you saw no way that you and Jack would ever end up as friends, let alone in a relationship again. 

Taglist @jackharloww @harlowcomehome @nattinatalia (sorry to tag you twice, but I had to repost 🫣)

[ask-emo-raiden]

How was the Easter? Had fun with cousins or something? I am really interested in hearing more!

okay so it was insane (o_o)

turns out i'm cousins with that crazy kid i was talking about who blew up the toilet last year, and his brother who is also his twin even though he has blonde hair and his brother has brown hair??? how does that even work /(@~@)\

anyway they were supposed to come with their parents (my aunt and uncle) but they were just dropped off or something? so they stayed for a couple hours and we ate dinner n stuffs and then eli (the blonde one) took over the livingroom tv and david (the brunette) and me hung out in my room for a bit

he was actually pretty cool i guess, def calmer than his twin brother but still a little weird, he thought my room was "neat" which is oddly positive coming from a jock like him (o.o')

at 1 point he started smoking and actually offered me a cigarette which... is pretty badass i think, but i didn't take it cuz i never smoked before (but i didn't tell him that, i just said that i didn't want to rn cause i didn't want him to think i was some kind of pussy...) but he just shrugged n didn't seem bothered so i guess he still thinks i'm cool enough to hang out with

not that it matters what he thinks about me though cuz he's just some dumb jock and they don't get it so (e_e)

anyway after they left n i was helping my stepdad clean up he must have smelled the smoke or somethin and he got pissed and asked me if i smoked a cigarette and i told him no because i didn't but he didn't believe me so he grounded me!!!!! UGH

besides how dumb that was i'm still in shock that i was adopted into the family with that crazy eli kid, and that his twin brother is like the first jock in the universe who hasn't called me a fag for being emo

miracles do happen i guess?

[03-shiro-25]

Min Yoongi | Are my feelings not important?...

Min Yoongi x gn reader

Synopsis: at reader's family dinner he saw how worried a very important person to him reacted to someone not feeling well mentally and got reminded about how the person reacted when reader felt like he could never be happy again

warnings: angst

Note: i will probably mainly write for Suga on this blog. He is like my ULT Bias AND ULT comfort person on this planet. He helped me so much so I feel the most comfortable when I write for him (and Jk)

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵❘༻༺❘‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵❘༻༺❘‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿

Today was the day you would be meeting up with your whole family. You were so excited, you haven't seen them in forever. You had a pretty good relationship with your family. But since they were all busy with their own lives and you were busy with your work as an producer at hybe entertainment you never got the chance to meet up.

It was in the afternoon when you started to get ready. You didn't put on anything fancy or styled your hair. They all knew you were no fan of dressing up and stuff. So you were not worried when you looked in the mirror and saw yourself with messy hair, some wide jeans and an plain black shirt. You liked your style.

So after you were finished getting ready you headed to the front door where your boyfriend was already waiting for you. "You ready?" he asked you as he eyed you up and down with a smile. He knew how exited you have been for the last week. You were only talking about that dinner and how you have missed them all so much. The whole week your mood had been over the roof.

"I guess you will come home late today then?" he opened the front door for you as he walked out with you.

"Yeah, probably haha" you giggled, growing more excited. "Well, I might still be at the studio when you come back so either you go home to rest or you come visit me after your dinner" he shot you a dirty grin before he started to laugh. "Yeah, we will see. Love you. See you later." you spoke fast, giving him a small kiss before each heading to your own cars. He drove off to the studio while you went the other direction towards the restaurant where you were supposed to meet your family.

The moment you arrived one of your aunts came walking to you. "Y/n! It is so good to see you again! Did you grow a bit more again? I swear you are taller than the last time I saw you" She always said that when she saw you. You laughed "Hello to you too! You think I grew again? Well I hope so!" you smiled at her. You really liked her.

"Come with me! The others are already inside" she told you as she lead you the way to the table where your whole family sat. You almost teared up at that sight. Your two aunts who were always bickering about something. Your grandma who was in despair since her hearing aids weren't working right AGAIN, your uncle who didn't speak much, your older sister with her bright pink hair AND her husband was here too! He was really introverted! At family meetings he almost only talked to you! With others he only said something when he was asked something, but with you he talked and talked and talked. You waved and smiled at him, he did too when he was you.

Next was your little sister. She was still pretty young, about 12 years old, but really cute. Then your stepdad and finally your mother. When she saw you she immediately stood up to hug you. "Hey my treasure, how have you been?" since you were a child she always called you her treasure. You thought that that was really sweet. "Work is great, it is really fun! And the people I work with are very nice" she nodded at you as your aunt interrupted you. "Yah! We don't want to know about your work! Tell us, do you have a girlfriend yet?" you just rolled your eyes at her.

Of course she only wanted to know that. "No, I don't" you said without explaining that you have a boyfriend. "Do you have a boyfriend?" your older sister asked you. Now a smirk grew on you face. "Yes, I do." your sister just smiled at you knowingly. A sigh was heard from your aunt.

The dinner went on like that. Just catching up on the lives of each other. In between you went to your sisters husband to talk to him since he couldn't really talk with the others. But you noticed that your younger sister has been awfully quite the whole time. Your mother seemed to have noticed too as she excused herself and her youngest child. They stood up and left the table to a quiet area where they could talk unbothered. You had a strange feeling so you followed them.

You knew eavesdropping wasn't ok but you somehow couldn't stop yourself, you were way too curious. They stopped in a hallway where no people where. You hid behind a wall where they couldn't see you but you could see and hear them. Your mother crouched down a bit to be on your sisters level. "Please tell me what's wrong love" she looked at her with concern-filled eyes. Your little sister looked down to the ground. "I don't know... I just haven't been to happy with my live lately I guess.." the little one mumbled. To ashamed to look at your mother.

"It is just... I hate my life at the moment..." the moment you said these words to your mother you regretted it and wished you would have just stayed silent.

Oh no... You were ready to step in at every moment. Preparing yourself you argue with your mother and comfort your sister but it never came to it. Your mothers next acts and words shocked you. They hurt. "Would you like to tell me why sweetheart? Maybe we can work on making it better together?" she softly spoke as she hugged the small one in a comforting manner.

Your heart dropped the moment you heard her say that. You were not expecting that. An aching pain started to spread in your chest and your breathing got caught in your lungs. Suddenly your body felt heavier than before and your mind went blank.

She seemed angry and disappointment "Sorry that your life is SHIT. I am sorry for giving birth to you and gifting you this awful life." what she said and the way she said it broke you. It sounded as if she thought that it wasn't her problem and that you only wanted to hurt her. Tears started to fall from your eyes. You came to her because you thought she would give you comfort... but she didn't.

You had to get out of here. You had to leave. You couldn't stay here right now. So you rushed back and gathered your stuff. Your family looked at you confused. "Sorry... my boyfriend needs me home as soon as possible. It was nice meeting you all again." with that you left and basically ran to your car. As soon as you closed the car door your mothers word repeated in your head over and over again. 'I am sorry for giving birth to you' 'I am sorry for giving birth to you' over and over again. Like a broken record. No matter how hard you tried to think of something else the words kept replaying in your head.

You could barely concentrate on driving, almost getting in a car accident. 'Where are you Suga?.. I need you..' with that thought appearing in between your mothers hard words you drove faster. Needing to see him as soon as possible. He was the only person on earth that could give you comfort.

You arrived at the studio and rushed inside, heading straight to your boyfriends 'genius lab'. With every step you took your body started to feel heavier. You knocked before entering after you heard him give you the ok. As he turned with his chair to see who it was he was surprised to see you already back. He thought you would stay away longer. "Hey baby, why are you back already? Is everything ok?" the moment he asked you that you felt your strength leaving your legs as they slowly gave out under you.

You leaned on the closest wall to you and slowly slid down until you were sat on the floor. Suga was beyond concerned, jumping up from his seat to rush and crouch down in front of you. "Hey. Hey.. what is wrong baby? Did anything happen?" he asked but you couldn't answer him. 'I am sorry for giving birth to you' 'Maybe we can work on making it better together?' the words your mother said to your sister replayed in your head, like it was mocking you.

Did she love your sister more then you? Why did she react different with her? Is she more important than you?...

"Are my feelings not important?..." that was the first thing your boyfriend heard from you this night. Your voice sounded lifeless as you were just staring in front of you. It scared him. A few single tears streamed down your face. A frown adorned his face after he heard these words leave your lips. "Of course your feelings are important. Don't ever think that they are not, ok?" he tried to reassure you. "Would you like to tell me what happened?" you had been so excited about tonight, he just had to know what could have ruined that for you.

"My mother... when I was a kid and felt like everything was to much and like I would break down every moment I trusted her and told her how I felt... 'Sorry that your life is SHIT. I am sorry for giving birth to you and gifting you this awful life.' That were her exact words to my feelings... but today my little sister told her that she was feeling like I did back than... my mother wasn't angry at her. She offered to help her.." Yoongi's jaw clenched as he heard the story.

How could your mother have said that to you? Especially at a time you were feeling like shit anyways. He was furious. And he was sad for you. You looked so broken when you spoke about it. So he sat down onto the floor beside you and offered you some cuddles. Of course you accepted as you leaned in and cried your eyes out on his shoulders. He made you feel like your feelings were important. Like he understood how you felt. He was your family.

"You know Yoongi? When she said that to me back then I of course felt hurt, but more did I feel sorry. I shouldn't have told her how I felt. It must have been hard for her to hear these words leave my lips.." you thought about it.

"Even if it hadn't been easy for her, you were suffering too. And she is your mother. She is supposed to be there for you. To help you through tough times. So you had no reason to feel sorry" he sounded sad as he spoke.

"Actually, every time she cared for someone else I felt my heart ache and questioned myself 'Why couldn't you care for me the same way? Why? Do you not love me enough?' For years the memories and thoughts wouldn't leave my head. It was so draining. I felt tired. But I can't talk with my mom about this... even though I really want to know why she reacted the way she did.."

"I will do anything I can to help you forget about it. I am sure your mother had a good reason for her behavior back then. And please never feel like you are any less important than anyone else. For me you are the most important person alive." a small smile could be seen on your face thanks to his words. As he saw that he felt relieved and smiled back.

You were not angry at your mother. But you had to admit you were a bit hurt and disappointed. But that didn't matter anymore. All that mattered was the man who was currently holding you close, telling you over and over again how important you were. Soon you fell asleep in his embrace. He couldn't fall asleep for a long time. Thinking about what your mother said and how you must have felt hearing these words as a kid.

He swore himself that he would always pay attention to your emotions and would help you whenever you needed him.

[iamvegorott]

A Rotten Summoning

Thank you @phonenix for commissioning this! <3

Summary: Yandere gets dared to summon her stepdad, Anti, to prove he is real. But when her 'friends' decide to treat Anti like a toy and hurt him emotionally and physically, she ends up ruining her connection to Anti and even puts Dark and Anti's relationship at risk.

A Rotten Summoning

“I’m telling you, he’s a literal Demon.” Yandere felt like she had repeated herself for the thousandth time to her friends.

“You’re just saying that to sound cool.” One of her friends, a girl her age named Maria, scoffed. “You’re all prim and proper, and you think having a Demon for a stepdad will negate all that.” 

“I am not all prim and proper.” Yandere protested. 

“You're the only one with a stainless uniform.” Her other friend, a boy a little younger than the two girls named Lincoln, pointed to Yandere’s pristine white top. The three of them were sitting on the floor in Maria’s basement, drinking weird mixtures that they made from juice and stuff from her parent’s liquor cabinet.

“My dad does the laundry. Of course, it’s stainless. He’s the overly formal one, not me.” Yandere hoped they didn’t notice how she was trying not to spill any of her drink on her shirt. Dark would throw a fit if she got red juice on it. Blood he could work with. Juice was annoying. 

“So Mr. Overly Formal is married to a Demon?” Maria asked.

“He’s not human either,” Yandere said.

“Not this again.” Lincoln groaned. 

“Why do you two never believe me?” 

“Show us actual proof, and we will.” Maria reached over and tapped Yandere’s phone. “And fake pictures don’t count.”

“They weren’t fake. My dad is literally gray.”

“That was literally a black-and-white filter.” Lincoln rolled his eyes.

“It was not!”

“Then summon him,” Maria said.

“What?”

“Summon your stepdad if he’s a Demon. My parents aren’t going to be home for several more hours. Let’s get him here with a summoning and prove us wrong.”

“I’m only supposed to do that in emergencies,” Yandere said. “Like, life-or-death ones since summoning him means that…” She let her voice trail off.

“Means what? That you’re a liar?” Lincoln poked Yandere’s side. 

“I am not! And it means he has to obey the person who summoned him for an hour. It’s a weird contract that gets set up that he has no control over. You know, like a genie, but he can kill people.” 

“You’re pulling that out of your ass because you know it doesn’t work.” Maria finished her drink and stood up. “Just admit you’re trying to be cool, and we can move on.” 

“I’m not admitting to lying about something that’s true. I’m a lot of things, but I am not a liar.” Yandere stood up as well. 

“Then summon your stepdad. Make us eat our words.” Lincoln bounced to his feet. “Unless you’re a liar and a chicken.” He tucked his thumbs into his armpits and flapped them like wings, clucking a few times. 

“I am not-” Yandere got cut off by louder clucking, and Maria was now joining in. “Fine! I’ll summon him!” Her patience for mocking was even thinner than Dark’s. “Don’t blame me if he kills you after the hour is up.” She went to the open cabinet and grabbed one of the bottles of vodka. After popping open the lid, she screwed on one of the pour spouts.  

“Need a shot first or something?” Maria asked with a laugh. 

“Need something flammable,” Yandere explained. She had a little kit on her, but she wanted to make this into a show. Her proof was going to be one her friends would never forget. 

“What a waste.” Maria clicked her tongue as Yandere poured the vodka on the floor, making a circle around herself. 

“This is either going to be really cool or really embarrassing,” Lincoln said. “Or concerning.” He added at seeing Yandere prick her finger and make an x on the floor with her blood. They didn’t need to know that she only needed a little drop, but again, making this a show. 

“This is going to be cringe when it fails,” Maria said as Yandere stood between them, taking a match out and lighting it. It was a special one. Carved in it was Anti’s Demonic symbol, the thing you actually needed to summon him. Blood was the sacrifice. His symbol getting burned did the rest. The more you knew of Anti, the less blood that you needed.

“It won’t,” Yandere stated before dropping the match onto the vodka, igniting the circle, and soon, a strong gust of wind started blowing back against them. 

“Holy shit!” Maria cursed while Lincoln just yelled as the flames grew, and soon Anti appeared in the center, body taking on its Demonic form with his ears pointed, teeth sharp, fingers as claws, and eyes pitch black. “Holy shit!” Maria cursed again. “You-he-that’s a Demon!” 

“You weren’t lying…you weren’t lying!” Lincoln started laughing, and he went over to Anti. 

“You said he has to do what you say for the next hour?” Maria asked as she went over as well.

“Yeah,” Yandere answered softly. 

“Yan? What is this? Are you okay?” Anti asked, stepping away from the two as he looked around. 

“I’m okay.” Yandere thickly swallowed. 

“Then why-”

“I have so many things in mind that we should do!” Maria cut off Anti’s question. “We have to see how far you can go.” 

“I just said we were summoning him. That’s it.” Yandere crossed her arms.

“Don’t be boring.” Maria huffed. 

“Have some fun,” Lincoln added. 

“You proved you weren’t lying, now prove you’re not a coward.”

“But…” Yandere looked at her friends, then to Anti, and then back to her friends. They were looking at her, waiting, expecting her to go with them, and eventually, she broke. “Okay.” 

“Hell yeah!” Maria and Lincoln cheered, and Yandere tried to ignore the look in Anti’s eyes. 

That look of pure disappointment

x~x~x

Yandere stood facing Dark’s office door, having knocked a few moments ago and waiting to get told to come in. It was the next morning, and she woke to a text from Dark telling her to go to his office as soon as possible to discuss what she had done. 

“Enter.” 

Oh, she was so screwed.

Enter was for when Dark knew who was at the door and was beyond angry with them. She’d seen it before, and it never ended well for the person on the side of the door she was on. 

“Um…hey, Dad?” Yandere greeted after opening the door and seeing Dark standing in front of his desk, leaning against it. 

“Sit.” Dark pointed to the empty chair. 

“Okay.” Yandere closed the door and sat as ordered, hands in her lap. “Listen, I-”

“Don’t. You’re going to listen.” Dark stated, and Yandere curled up a little on herself. “You know you're grounded. No phone, no friends, nothing but school and helping around the house for three months.”

“Three months!?”

“Do you want to make it four?” Dark’s tone got Yandere to press her lips together and look down at her legs. “I can’t believe you would do something so stupid. So reckless. So insulting to Anti. You know better than this.” 

“I was just-”

“You were just what? Trying to show off to some brats that don’t care about you?”

“They care about me!”

“Do they? If they did, they wouldn’t have made you summon a Demon while you were all drinking. Drinking underage, might I add. I should add two more months for that alone.” 

“They’re my friends.”

“Friends would have believed you or at least would have stopped when you provided proof and not have used Anti as a toy for their own entertainment.” Dark waited for a response but didn’t get anything. “Do you have any idea how humiliating that was for him? How devastated he is by you using him like that?” He still got nothing. “I am very disappointed in you, Yandere.” 

“I’m sorry,” Yandere said softly. 

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.” Dark shook his head. “You are going to beg Anti for his forgiveness, and you should pray he does, or it’ll be worse for you. Now go. I have work to do.” He dismissed Yandere with a wave of his hand. 

“Okay.” Yandere got up and left the office, knowing she had also hurt Dark since he’d never told her to go like that. He usually wanted her to stay, to be in the room with him, since they didn’t see each other as much as he wanted. But now he couldn’t even look at her.

Yandere had a good guess of where to find Anti, heading for the bedroom he and Dark had shared for almost a year. She pressed an ear to the door. When she heard movement, she knocked. 

“Come in.” Anti’s voice didn’t have its usual energy. That worried Yandere a bit. 

“Um…hey?” Yandere stepped in and felt more worried when she saw Anti folding up clothes and putting them into a suitcase. “What are you doing?”

“I’m moving back in with the Septiceyes,” Anti answered flatly. 

“What? Why?” 

“You know why.” 

“I’m sorry about what happened, but don’t take this out on Dad.” 

“You’re not sorry, and Dark will understand.” 

“I am sorry! I didn’t want to do that.”

“And yet you did. You weren’t in danger, no one was going to kill you, no one had a gun to your head or knife to your throat, you were the one in full control, and you let two little shits that don’t give a damn about you treat me like their servant and a toy. It took Edward an hour to get all that glass out of me.” Anti finally had emotion in his voice, but it was only pure anger. 

“I didn’t think they’d-”

“You didn’t do any thinking last night, did you?” Anti cut her off. “At least you finally realized it was a bad thing after they broke those bottles on my body.” He shook his head and closed the suitcase, zipping it up. “And I guess I should stop thinking as well. I truly thought we were finally getting along. That you had accepted me, but no. I’m just still the weird guy your dad’s fucking.” 

“That’s not true. Anti, please. I am really, really sorry for what they did.”

“You’re sorry for what they did, but you’ve yet to apologize for what you did.” Anti lifted his suitcase. “You claim that turning eighteen next month is going to make you an adult, but something actual adults do is take accountability for their actions. I’ve done a lot of fucked up things in my life, and I own up to that. Maybe one day you’ll actually grow up and do the same.” 

“Anti, please. Don’t.” Yandere’s voice cracked as Anti walked past her. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I swear I am. Anti, Anti, don’t go.” She followed Anti out of the room. “Just listen to me. I fucked up. Please don’t leave. Please. I’m sorry.” Anti paused and glanced over his shoulder.

“I don't forgive you right now, and I don't know if I ever will. I'm going to need time. Give Dark back my matches and tell him I’ll call him later.” He didn’t give Yandere any time to respond before he glitched away. 

“Anti, please,” Yandere said to the empty space, shoulders dropping as it fully hit how much she ruined. 

This was going to be far from an easy fix. 

[arcadian-litterateur]

bury it | kirin o'connor

masterlist

summary: kirin has a no-side-effects solution to dealing with trauma: he buries it. but as time goes on while he’s trapped on the island, he realizes slowly that this “no-side-effects” solution does, indeed, have side effects—and they might just be eating him alive.

word count: 1.7k

warnings: mentions of ab*se and r*pe

a/n: i know we never got kirin’s full backstory in the wilds before it was cancelled; only a tiny part of it, so i decided to use what little information we had, kirin’s obviously trained responses with josh’s situation, and fan theories to create my own backstory for him. this is a super dark one shot, guys, and it’s not romance or anything. it’s just a backstory for kirin, but i do indeed plan on making more kirin one shots that will most likely use this backstory as a foundation, so keep an eye on that! this is like my own little the wilds world-building, ig you could say. also... @mirchoff here it is! probably not at all what you thought the "kirin one shot" would be but i have a dark side ig. don't worry we'll get less dark kirin content soon.

𝗞𝗜𝗥𝗜𝗡 𝗜𝗦 no stranger to this shitty feeling. This shitty feeling of not mattering to the people he's supposed to matter to. It hit him early, and it fucked with his soul. He had a choice: let it fuck him up, or bury it.

He buried it, and he's been burying it ever since.

On the outside, he's always been the golden boy, the star athlete, the happy, popular jock who has everything he could ever want. He's always been a stereotype; a cliche…an easy-to-read, hard-to-get-with jock.

On the inside, he figures he's still a cliche, just a different one. He's an eccedentesiast. Someone who hides pain behind a smile. The golden boy, sure, but the golden boy with a dark past.

Maybe that's all he is: a remix of all the other broken, blond white boys. After all, what piece of Kirin O’ Connor isn't borrowed? He acts like his mom—she's a good woman, but she’s emotionally unavailable to him, much like his emotional withdrawal from the people around him. He looks just like his dad—fucking piece of shit. He got his jock attitude from the popular boys he used to idolize on television—now he realizes it was easier for them, because they had a script, and he didn't even get a plot summary. His talk comes from his coach—who saved his life, for which he'll always be grateful, but then ended up being a shitty, racist person just like the rest of them, and he hates him for it.

If he thinks about it, Kirin O’Connor doesn't truly like being this convoluted chemical reaction of different people. He wants to be something of his own. But he isn't sure how. And when he's honest with himself, he acknowledges that he's scared he's too fucked up to be anything on his own.

It started when he was a young, young boy, and his mother's father—he will never call him his grandfather—kicked them out of his house. He's not sure when he realized that relatives aren't supposed to be jerks, but he knows without a doubt that the only thing he and that man have in common is blood. He swears he will never be like his mother’s father; he will never sentence someone to cold nights in a car with the backseat for a bed.

Kirin still remembers clearly the days before he was popular. When he was still living in his mom’s car, abandoned by his father and now his grandfather, he watched his mom slowly slip away from him. And when he voiced his concerns to his teacher, explaining as best as an eight-year-old can that his mom needed help, he was mocked by the other children.

He was bullied by the other children for being forced into the role of caregiver too early.

Kirin shoved that pain down and decided that he was above it all. He spent so much time above it all that eventually, everyone else worked their way up, pulling themselves to his level like they envied his life. Gosh, if only they knew what his life was like.

He’s had two stepdads, and neither lasted. The first was named Grant, the second was Harvey. They were both artists, like maybe his mom had a type or something, and they were both sick. Not disease sick, but fucked up in the head, gross sick. Grant would always come home drunk, the classic stepdad with a beer belly and a loud, “Honey, I’m home!” He’d force Kirin’s mom to make his gross, alcoholic friends bean dip and casseroles. They’d trash the living room and then complain when Kirin didn’t clean up after them. 

Kirin didn’t understand why his mom put up with it for as long as she did. It was only after Harvey was gone, too, that his mom showed Kirin the scar from the fireplace poker that Grant had stabbed her with when he was too drunk to think straight, whispering out the nasty threats Grant had made towards Kirin if she didn’t keep quiet. Kirin remembered that trip to the ER, but his mom told everyone she’d tripped and bumped the poker. And everyone had believed it, Kirin included.

But if Grant was awful, Harvey was a demon from hell. Actually, Kirin had contemplated this theory totally seriously at one point, so confused as to how someone could be so cruel. What his mom had seen in this guy was beyond him, but once the new couple got back from their honeymoon, Harvey turned nasty, and Kirin had to sit and watch. Harvey didn’t even try to hide the fact that he abused Kirin’s mom from the boy, who was fourteen at the time. He’d almost boast about it, as if he expected Kirin to take his side, too. Instead, Kirin learned the hard way that Harvey was harder to expose than he thought.

Sometimes, if Kirin is feeling especially masochistic, he’ll pull up his shirt and brush his hands along the dull, dark lumps of scar tissue all over his stomach from the countless times Harvey put out his cigarette on the boy’s pale skin. Maybe that’s one of the reasons that Kirin stays tan—it doesn’t hide the scars all the way, but it makes them seem less suspicious. Like they’re birthmarks or freckles.

But the cigarette burns were the least cruel abuse that Harvey subjected him to, and he doesn’t really want to even think about the other shit Harvey put him through. Kirin hasn’t told anyone about the darkest parts of that time in his life. They’ve heard about all the physical abuse; the violence, but he’s never told anyone about the worst of it. Not his therapist, not his CPS officer. Definitely not his mom, even though she’d endured the same, or even worse. If he talks about the hazy memories from those nights, he has to confront the fact that they were real, and so he leaves those memories be. Tells himself they’re just nightmares.

It could be true. Harvey is a consistent visitor in Kirin’s dreams. Even if the real man is locked away in a prison somewhere, he still haunts Kirin’s sleep like a specter. 

He haunts Kirin now, even on this godforsaken island in the middle of nowhere. Kirin knows in his head that even if Harvey escaped prison and found Kirin’s old high school, he’d have no way to get to Kirin, because nobody fucking knows where he is.

Even Kirin doesn’t know where he is.

Maybe his memories that he swears are nightmares are the reason he could tell something was wrong with Josh. Kirin can’t explain what exactly tipped him off, but something inside his chest got super fucking tight, like it was constricting all of his blood and was going to rip his heart apart, and so he jumped in and told Josh to come with him. He was convinced he was being paranoid.

But now, staring at the welts on Josh’s chest, Kirin feels his blood chill, his fingertips finding the small pebbled cigarette scars on his torso as goosebumps rise on his body. Josh spews some excuse about gluten when Kirin confronts him about it, and Kirin isn’t having it.

He isn’t proud of what he does next, but he’s desperate to get this boy to tell him what’s wrong—or what isn’t wrong. What might just be in Kirin’s head, like all the nightmares. 

So he brings up Seth, uses him as a weapon, as a match that he waves under Josh’s nose, trying to light the fuse in this meek boy, trying to get him to snap and admit something, anything. And just like Kirin knew it would, it works. Josh is yelling at him, talking about how Seth is the problem, and the way his voice quivers as he trails off and his fists tighten up in a defensive stance makes Kirin want to crumple to the ground.

Because he knows that look. That terrified, angry look. He knows that look, because he’s seen it in the mirror on himself. Josh isn’t Josh right now as Kirin stares down at him. Josh is fourteen-year-old Kirin trying to explain away the odd wounds on his stomach to his coach, who isn’t buying it. Josh is fourteen-year-old Kirin breaking down in the lacrosse team’s locker room, finally admitting what Harvey’s been doing. 

And in that instant, even before he asks Josh to elaborate, Kirin knows what Josh did. He knows without a doubt what a sick, demented fuck Seth is, and all he can see when he blinks is Harvey, leering and spitting and screaming at Kirin, hurting him in more ways than just physical.

Kirin sees red, and he knows at that moment that he’s going to make Seth pay for what he’s done to Josh, because no one ever made Harvey pay for his worst crimes against Kirin, and Kirin can’t stand to see another r*pist get away with it. 

Kirin freezes as the thought flashes through his mind, a hand flying up to his torso again, numbly pinching at one of the scars. He’s never been willing to even think it before. To ever truly face the reality of Harvey’s twisted abuse. But he just did, and the full force of it is crashing down on Kirin, bringing tears to his eyes. He blinks them away, rage almost bubbling out of his throat as he growls,

“I’m going to kill him.”

And he isn’t truly thinking about Seth at that moment, not really, but since he can’t get his hands on Harvey to tear him limb from limb, he’ll have to settle. 

Even after he’s pulled away from Seth, the sick asshole sadly still alive and breathing, Kirin knows that he won’t stop protecting Josh. He won’t let Josh do what he did. Because when Harvey hurt Kirin, Kirin buried it. That’s what he did with the hard shit. He buried it. And slowly, it’s killing him from the inside out. Kirin doesn’t want Josh to fall prey to that. Kirin doesn’t want Josh to bury it.

And Kirin thinks to himself that maybe, just maybe, it’s time to pull out a shovel and start digging. Not a grave for Seth or Harvey, (oh, how he wishes), but a hole into the deep abysses in his heart, so he can finally start to unbury all of the shit rotting away from inside him.

Kirin is done burying it.

𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥

[thesporkidentity]

The Great Blue Heron of Dunbar Road

By Ada Limón, current Poet Laureate of the United States (1976- ), Published 2015

That we might walk out into the woods together, and afterwards make toast in our sock feet, still damp from the fern’s wet grasp, the spiky needles stuck to our legs, that’s all I wanted, the dog in the mix, jam sometimes, but not always. But somehow, I’ve stopped praising you. How the valley when you first see it—the small roads back to your youth—is so painfully pretty at first, then, after a month of black coffee, it’s just another place your bullish brain exists, bothered by itself and how hurtful human life can be. Isn’t that how it is? You wake up some days full of crow and shine, and then someone has put engine coolant in the medicine on another continent and not even crying helps cure the idea of purposeful poison. What kind of woman am I? What kind of man? I’m thinking of the way my stepdad got sober, how he never told us, just stopped drinking and sat for a long time in the low folding chair on the Bermuda grass reading and sometimes soaking up the sun like he was the story’s only subject. When he drove me to school, we decided it would be a good day, if we saw the blue heron in the algae-covered pond next to the road, so that if we didn’t see it, I’d be upset. Then, he began to lie. To tell me he’d seen it when he hadn’t, or to suppose that it had just taken off when we rounded the corner in the gray car that somehow still ran, and I would lie, too, for him. I’d say I saw it. Heard the whoosh of wings over us. That’s the real truth. What we told each other to help us through the day: the great blue heron was there, even when the pond dried up, or froze over; it was there because it had to be. Just now, I felt like I wanted to be alone for a long time, in a folding chair on the lawn with all my private agonies, but then I saw you and the way you’re hunching over your work like a puzzle, and I think even if I fail at everything, I still want to point out the heron like I was taught, still want to slow the car down to see the thing that makes it all better, the invisible gift, what we see when we stare long enough into nothing.

[jokeringcutio]

I didn't know if you take asks or not, new to your blog. But I just wanted to ask something about your recent fic the stepdad William, pregnancy one.

(And in no way am I trying to get you to change the story to how you want it to go)

But I was curious, if through everything the reader goes through what would Williams reaction be if she decided to run away. Obviously she won't want to hurt her mom and she might try and reach out to her mother after a bit. But maybe one night it gets to much to see him coddling readers mom about her pregnancy and ignore her around the mom so she decides to skip to a friend's or something that might be far from the house, and makes sure to tell the police about running off so they don't write a missing person report if anyone went to the police about her whereabouts. Just curious about your thoughts on this.

Oh, Anon, that is such a wonderful plotline💜, I hadn't even thought of that.

Also: Welcome to my blog, always feel free to poke me. I enjoy talking to mutuals :)

First things first, My stepdad drabbles are mostly stand-alone snippets. Though some can be seen as following up on each other :3 So I can write any situation I want.

Second of all, yep, two more drabbles are coming up this week that link to the pregnancy one. So strap in👀. And yes, I now desperately want to write your suggestion. But here are some thoughts:

If Reader ran away, * Mom would be devastated.

And let's be honest, William would be too. 👀 So there's that to consider, mentally. I think Reader will be aware of that and knowing you'll hurt your mom, while she is already overly emotional. Well... * Then there's William to consider. Want to upset him? Possibly yes. Though Reader might also be scared of angering him/going against his will. In my mind, even when he is a horrible ass to the Reader, Stepdad William Afton is smitten with Reader in his own way and probably prefers what they have over what he has with the mom. Whether it is purely based on power and control, sexual attraction, or actual love. I like to canon the idea that William would want to keep Reader near.

Ah sweetie... look at that face of Daddy... You're not gonna run away from that? Or are you 👀 MUAHAHAHAH

* If we take William as the man who actually rejoices in the idea of having a kid with Reader, possibly hid her contraceptives in hopes of her falling pregnant, or having some kind of twisted breeding kink... well.... Whatever it is. William will be very angry if Reader leaves. And phew... prepare for that! * Next item on the list, where will you go? Can Reader risk scurrying the streets? Do you have a friend to crash at? But for how long?Practical little details and risks to calculate. Plus, Reader will be pregnant. And though some will have little difficulties while in that state, others will be too tired, too sick, suffering from complications, etc. So you're taking risks here and adding even more stress and worry to your mind. But suppose you leave in an emotional rush, suppose you have that friend to stay at. Then we arrive to the next, and most thrilling part:

* Informing the police. OH YES. If you do this, what will you tell them? Because I can guarantee you, if I write this, they will notice the pregnant tummy. And then? Would you lie and say you got knocked up by a random boy from school/study and your parents are mad about it? [ Shielding Afton's reputation but leaving him wielding power over you?] Or, would you honestly tell them you are carrying your stepdad's child? Because in the latter, think of what kind of effect it will have on him.

[ Risking him being seen as a criminal with possible jail time ahead pending, we can take this as far as we want to, anon. As far as we want >D. In his best case, you can defend that things have been mutual and he just gets to hear to stay away from you.] William's reputation... wow.... The neighborhood finding out your little secret. 👀

So MANY possibilities, Anon, I just afshgafahagh So, to answer a short question long, This is such an interesting angle and I love to hear your opinions on it. I feel tempted to write a scenario where Reader legs it whilst carrying stepdad's child. Think of all the drama and angst that we could have. And then, which way shall we go? Is it just ordinary but pervy stepdad Afton? Or will it be more canonical killer!Afton who is your daddy? I mean, the world is our oyster. Anon :3 Love you. Thank you for interacting and sharing your mind with me.

[verdantmeadows]

We just had a repair person come by and repair our fireplace and now our entire house smells like gas. Like, incredibly badly and strongly. Everywhere. So we are currently evacuated outside waiting for them or someone to come back ig! But like what are they gonna even do? It's not like they'd wanna go hmm yeah we accidentally made carbon monoxide in your house sorry. Also, when you smell gas for a while, you get desensitized to it?? So...how are we supposed to know when it's gone? The repair person certainly wouldn't know if they're working with it. But like, the WHOLE house smelled like it. Even in rooms that are super shoved away. And I do feel dizzy but I think I'm just tricking myself into feeling that since I've felt dizzy all day. Do we call 911???? We're fine so 911 feels....excessive. and I don't know if we'll have to pay them anything. My stepdad thinks we're all overreacting/doesn't understand and keeps going inside and turning on the lights which!!! Can spark a fire if there is case!!! I wish I got my teddy bear but I only had time to get dressed and get a blanket since it's like freezing out. I have no idea what we're supposed to do. I think my mom has called the fireplace people and they'll be like "umm yeah we don't know when we'll be there lol!" so do we just. Stay in the cold.

[moondragon618]

So uh. I think I've decided that I want to be a little bit more open about some things on here bc honestly trying not to acknowledge it is just causing me a ton of unnecessary stress (and I'm sure as fuck not acknowledging it irl lmaooo) so yeah. So I'll start with this: I'm currently unemployed and living with my parents (mom and stepdad) and my younger but also adult brother (they all have some form of income but it's only just barely enough to get by). Now on its own the whole all of us living together thing should not be that big of a deal apparently according to what I've learned from hearing other ppl's experiences in similar situations. Unfortunately my parents do not think like this. My mom especially is convinced that we are literally ruining her life so y'know that's fun (:

Okay but seriously. I'm about to sound like I'm trying to downplay this (and maybe I am bc. Yk.) but like a good 80% or so of the time it's. Fine. We get along okay. But I know that's only bc we never acknowledge The Problems outside of the few bad days and we always just go on like those never even happened. And here's what I mean by bad days btw: ""Family Meetings"". Yeah that phrase is literally a fucking trigger for me now it's fucking bullshit. When I was younger it meant "me getting screamed at about how fucked up I am and how fucked I'll be in the "real world" and how I'm just "a soft spoiled little bitch bc I never got my ass beat" (like my brother. bc he's definitely fine and has no issues at all lmaooo) (and usually without the bitch part aside from once when I was a teenager) and now it's more "me getting screamed at by my mom abt how I'm ruining her life and her marriage" etc. etc. So yeah. My stepdad is a little better in that he only yelled at me one time when I was like 12 I think? And then never again. And he seems to at least understand that if screaming at still hasn't "fixed" me after 25 fucking years then it's probably not going to so yeah. And he did actually kind of stand up for me during the last one (in late September-ish) which I know isn't much but it's still way more than anyone else has done so I do appreciate it.

Anyway the last one was really fun (terrible) I got the usual + being told I being disrespectful for not coming out to the living room bc I was having a panic attack and quite literally frozen and unable to move 👍👍👍 And I've also been limited to just my phone since then bc my mom took my computer (bc god forbid we consider there might be a reason I'm on it so much) and still hasn't given it back and tbh I think I'd rather kms than ask for it back so that's fun too (:

I am aware that this is abusive behavior and that screaming at your child for any reason is in fact child abuse btw. It took me until very recently to come to terms with that even while knowing that (and I'm probably still not fully there tbh) but I know. It's that fucking generational trauma bullshit yk. My mom's side of the family is Fucked Up like her parents were terrible and their (mostly her dad's idk the other ones lol) parents. Yeah I'm not even comfortable talking about them right now that's like a whole other thing lmao. But yeah I know that doesn't even remotely make it okay.

And yeah like the day after shit like that happens we just never acknowledge it again until everyone's losing their shit again because nothing ever changes. Believe it or not being screamed at does not help me figure out how to navigate getting a source of income or how I'm supposed to do anything when we sure as fuck can't afford another vehicle or how I'm ever going to be able to afford my own place to live lmaooo. And I also literally cannot even talk to them about any of this without losing my ability to speak so that really doesn't help either (: I sure as fuck haven't tried calling out the bullshit either bc fuck that there's no fucking way that's going over well and I couldn't even if I wanted to (: (: (:

So I'm just kinda stuck here ig. It's really not too bad (most of the time). I'm not saying that to minimize or invalidate anything either I just want you all to know that it's not like super urgent or anything, I'm not in danger, my mental health isn't great obviously but I'm not at risk of hurting myself or suicide or anything. Promise <3 I'm a tenacious bastard sticking around out of pure spite and a desire to keep creating things if nothing else lmao :)

God this is kind of a trauma dump lmao but that about sums it up ig? I'm also very much open to advice if anyone has any <3

[tbmunson]

Can you write a platonic fluff Henderson sibling request where Dustin is jealous when his older sister who’s also his best friend is spending more time with Max after season 3 and she comforts him? Thank you in advance!

I'm Here For You. Dustin Henderson x Henderson!Reader

Summary: Basically what the ask says.

Warnings: A little sad, platonic sibling fluff

WC: 622

Masterlist

You rolled to a stop in your driveway, sighing as you cut the engine. Today was a particularly hard day for Max and although you never got along with Billy you couldn't imagine losing Dustin like that, or having him lose you. You spend a few days a week with Max trying to help her through the loss of her brother the best you could, especially since her stepdad left and her mother slipped into drinking. You found the strength to get out of your car, embracing the December cold as you made your way to the front door.

You closed the door behind you and shed your thick coat.

"Y/N! I'm glad you're home! I was just wondering if you'd help me put together a mini campaign. Eddie said I could DM a short one over break and I don't wanna make it too long or overly complicated and-" Dustin was so excited but you were exhausted.

"Can we do it tomorrow Dusty?" You hadn't meant to interrupt him, or even sound as disinterested as you did, but today was the last day of class before break, meaning you had tests just about all day, and spent the afternoon trying to comfort Max since this would be the first Christmas without her brother.

"Yeah. Sure." Dustin replied flat toned before turning to walk away. It was out of character for him but you didn't question it as you made your way to the bathroom to shower.

You hummed as the warm water washed over you, clearing the stress from the day away. It was like a moment of clarity. Dustin was really upset. He never, and you meant never, stopped talking that easily. You quickly finished your shower and got dressed before walking down the hall towards his room.

"Yeah. She's spending all of her time with Max. I never see her anymore. I know Max lost her brother but I feel like I'm losing my sister." His voice was soft, defeated almost.

"I'm sorry Dusty-Bun. Have you talked to her?" Suzie's voice came through the static.

"No, but-"

"Maybe we should." You said, walking into the room.

"I gotta go, Suzie-Poo." Dustin looked up at you, sadness written across his face as you settled down onto his bed. "You weren't supposed to hear that." He said, looking down.

"No, I think I was." You sighed, reaching over to rest your hand on his knee. "Dustin, I'm sorry. I wasn't intentionally ignoring you."

He nodded and looked at you with glossy eyes, a tale tell sign that tears were soon to follow. "It just sucks not having you around all the time. You're my best friend."

The quiver in his voice broke your heart. You pulled him by his hands to sit next to you. "You're mine too. I just... I guess if it had been you that lost me I would want someone to be there for you." You wrapped an arm around him and held him close.

He finally let the water leak from his eyes and down his face. "I don't wanna think about losing you. Ever." He closed his eyes and rested his head on your shoulder as you rubbed up and down his arm gently.

"You won't. I'm here for you, always." You kissed the top of his head as held him.

His wet eyelashes fluttered on the skin of your neck, making you feel more guilty. "Promise?"

You nodded, squeezing him again. "I promise, Dustin. I love you." You whispered, rocking him like you used to do when you were little.

"I love you too, sis." He finally wrapped his arms around you, hugging you tightly.

"Let's get started on this mini campaign, huh? Eddie's really gonna let you DM?" You smiled down at him, watching the excitement light his face up once more.

[bimobuddy]

This is gonna be more if a vent about college and my life rn, so if you wanna just scroll on, go ahead

This is why I haven't been writing fics lately, sorry y'all

I just feel like shit but fuck it we ball

CW: I'm pretty hard on myself, I know that already

So I failed both of my classes this semester, and then fucking forgot to check the calendar after spring break, and ended up being three fucking weeks late into this semester (I'm so smart, it's super cool)

One class I already knew I'd fail, but the other one, English, I really thought I was doing well, I started with an A, and I was really proud of myself. I tried, I really really tried in that class, but I failed it too.

My stepdad doesnt even believe me that I tried, he thinks I was lazy and not taking it seriously. I really tried my hardest, I had meltdowns over assignments, I reached out for help from my mom, and I turned in most of my shit, but he just doesn't believe me and hit me with the, "You know, I really thought you'd take this more seriously."

But I had to get a B in both classes, but I failed, and I wasted everyone's money. My parents and my grandparents helped me pay for this, and I wasted their money. Obviously I'm going to pay them back, but I feel like dog shit, and a failure. I feel like such a failure dude

Especially compared to all four of my brothers, shit

My older brother, he's doing well, he's an adult. Idk we dont talk much

Immediate younger brother, he's got a job, he's got a car, he knows how to work on his car, he's got friends, he's doing so well. He works in running heavy equipment I think

Second younger brother is the one who I tend to compare myself to the most. He's like the smartest guy I know, graduated high school like it was nothing, so doing extremely well in college, has a job, has a car, has a social life. It doesn't help at all that he's super arrogant about it and thinks he's smarter than everyone around him (he makes this clear by talking about me behind my back apparently, brought to my attention by my cousin) but I mean he's nice to my face and he gets me fast food sometimes, even when I dont ask, so I guess it's okay. I'm at least glad he's doing well.

And even my youngest brother is doing better than me, he has a job and a social life.

The only reason I dont have a job yet is because I was focusing on college, but now I'm like 100% sure I'm gonna be dropped.

So I'm 20, unemployed, a drop out, no license, no car, and no (irl) friends. I feel like a bum, a leech, and a failure. I absolutely feel like a loser lol

I've been failing at school ever since 3rd grade, I just never got it.

The only reason I even went through with going to college was because I didn't want to disappoint anyone, I just did it for my family and because I thought that's what I was -supposed- to do.

Now my stepdad thinks my only two options are joining the military (which I'm absolutely not doing) or joining a trade.

I know I have other options, like I've been told by others, but I can't begin to think of any.

I just really feel like a loser and a failure and like I let everyone down

Super cool, I'm doing great, this is awesome 👌

All I wanted to do was animation and voice acting, but I feel like I just fuck everything up