#What Is Reiki Healing Good For

[astrobiscuits]

Astrocartography notes

🌍 Do you want to study abroad? Work abroad? Your MC lines show what domain to pursue:

Sun MC: photographer, actor; check the planet ruling your Sun's zodiac sign for more details

Moon MC: nurse, preschool/elementary teacher, childcare worker/nanny, doula, housekeeper

Mercury MC: librarian, language teacher, speech language pathologist, translator, working in academia, journalist, PR agent, receptionist, secretary, architect, economist, comedian

Venus MC: modelling, artist, fashion designer, hairstylist, makeup artist, art director, interior designer, garden designer, florist, wedding planner

Mars MC: surgeon, firefighter, working at the police, sportsman (the type of sport depends on the zodiac sign Mars is in your birth chart, for ex. Mars in Pisces = football, swimming; Mars in Libra = gymnastics); fitness instructor

Jupiter MC: international driver (driving to your Jupiter MC line brings bonusess💰💰), flight attendant, hotel manager, tour guide, philosopher

Saturn MC: general practitioner, dentist, law, working in the Parliament, working in public institutions, business (CEO), historian, construction worker

Uranus MC: STEM (engineering, ecology sciences, biology), electrician, weather presenter, astronomer/astrophysicist, astrologer, sociology, social worker, advocate for human rights/activist

Neptune MC: choreographer, scenographer, film/theater director, actor, ballet dancer, music composer, rehabilitation worker, bartender, yoga instructor, meditation teacher, reiki practitioner

Pluto MC: adult actor, therapist, psychiatrist, any job regarding forensics (detective, toxicologist, forensic accountant etc.), embalmer, funeral director, loan officer, research analyst

🌍 If you have no astrocartography lines passing through the country you lived for most of your life, you probably don't feel at home in that country and have always wanted to relocate to another country

🌍 When you have atleast 2 lines "conjuncting" each other through a certain country, the planet that is more dominant in your birth chart will have a higher effect in astrocartography

🌍 Mercury IC line can show where one of your siblings or cousins relocate at some point during their life

🌍 If you're a girl and you have daddy issues (hey, we don't judge here!!), travelling to Saturn DSC line will likely bring you lots of opportunities of meeting your perfect partner, but also harsh lessons regarding control in a relationship (this is a good line for you to heal your daddy issues)

🌍 If you want to meet your future spouse and you (personally) find international guys attractive, travelling to Jupiter DSC line is a very good idea. Your future spouse might also be a foreigner in that country, just like you :)

🌍 Sun ASC line shows you where you can find your life's purpose. Also your depression:📉📉 0%, while your happiness:📈📈 100% (unless your Sun is in your 8th or 12th house, then the mental health effect is the complete opposite)

🌍 You could give birth on your Moon IC line😳 or your mom could have given birth to you on that line

🌍 Venus ASC line shows you where you could take lots of pictures (of yourself, of the sightseeings). Also, where you could get diabetes where you will want to try every type of sweets you find there

🌍 You will either get very drunk, consume drugs or smoke some weird shit on your Neptune ASC line (pls take care of your health)

🌍 You could randomly meet an ex or someone who resembles your ex while travelling to your Chiron DSC line

[martian-astro]

D9/ Navamsa chart observations - Part 3

Jupiter in 9th is a great placement, even better if it's the 7th lord or darakaraka in d1. Your spouse will be intelligent. there's also a chance that you may do your master's or PhD after marriage. Your spouse can also have a job related to spirituality (one of my mom's friends has this placement and his wife is a reiki healer and also teaches meditation and hypnosis)

Jupiter in 10th is another really good placement. You and your spouse could start a business together, or you may meet them in your workplace. This is one of the placements that indicate that you'll earn more after marriage or once you start working WITH them (okay, so this example is interesting, i dont know how many of you know this, but there's an Indian company, dabur, and one of my relatives got married to the daughter of the brother of the guy who currently owns the company and let me tell you something, they are RICH RICH RICH, and like they helped my relative set up his own company and whenever we visit them, they give us such expensive gifts, you won't even find them anywhere, like custom made stuff) so if other factors support this, then you can get married into a super rich household

Venus conjunct ketu in 4th is a super common placement but I've noticed that it gives different results depending on what the ascendant is. A common prediction would be, that you guys will not get along with your spouse's family, you're gonna think that they waste too much money when they already have less of it. This is especially true for mother in law (I know a girl with this placement whose mother in law spends a lot on shopping and then asks for money from her, and she has to give in because divorce is not an option) i would recommend you guys to marry someone who doesn't have a mother 🥲

I KNOW SO MANY PEOPLE WITH MERCURY IN 8TH and it's so fascinating how it has the same exact effect on everyone. Okay, so this placement gives you 2 things, first, you'll gain a lot of money through joint accounts with your spouse, this could also be a marriage where you guys stay together just for money, a lot of celebrities have this placement. Second, your spouse is gonna hide things from you, like their salary (i know a woman with this placement and her husband was promoted and he told his wife that he was still doing the low pay job and he opened another account where he saved that extra money, while their family was having financial difficulties and stuff, it was a BIG deal)

Mercury in 11th is a nice placement, this could indicate a friends to lover type of story with your spouse. They could also be an extrovert, especially if mercury is in gemini. You guys will be focused on earning money but your whole focus won't be on money, like in 2nd or 8th house, it's gonna be more like "oh, this looks like a good idea, should we invest in this" kinda thing, i would say this is more like, both practical and romantic relationship

Moon in 8th..... Not exactly the best placement. Almost all the people that i know with this placement have been cheated on by their spouse, and again your spouse could hide things from you, but this time it's more emotional. Also, i have noticed that a lot of people with this placement marry someone who's in the closet, so their partner isn't affectionate and loving towards them and they think it's their fault but it's not, but it still ends up hurting them. You, yourself, could hide your feelings as well, and your spouse can see that and that's why they hide THEIR emotions, it's like a cycle. (if you have this, i would recommend you guys to go to therapy, heal your trauma and only then get into a serious relationship and sometimes you push your feelings down and you think you're over it, but you're not)

Mars in 8th can give very different results, but it does give you a spouse who is very sexual (and believe me, it's not always a good thing). If Mars is strong then it gives extremely good results, the ability to defeat your enemies and win, i know a person with this placement and she's a woman and people around her have always tried to ruin her life and she still managed to get up and is now living a great life. But if Mars is weak or worse, debilitated, then it can give an aggressive spouse, i know a person but i dont think i should share her story with you all, but if Mars is weak then... Don't marry. BUT if 7th lord and darakaraka of d1 is SUPER STRONG in d9 then go ahead.

Venus in 2nd is like okay okay, not bad but not good. I feel like this placement works better when it's in the cart of a man rather than a woman. The spouse will be good but will be more focused on earning money, even if they're already rich. From what I've seen, men are okay with wives like that, but women aren't, they need emotional security so being with a man who is focused on money makes them sad and lonely, whereas, men with this placement are more than happy to get wives like that, In MY opinion.

Sun conjunct ketu in 11th is another placement that is common, I know a lot of people with this. So, you will gain wealth but it's going to come very slowly, the type to MAKE generational wealth but not able to enjoy it. Also, i have noticed that these people always end up marrying someone who is in a lower position than them, career wise and so they support their spouse and at the same time take most of the financial responsibility of the family.

Ketu in 8th is SUCH a strong indicator of having a kid before marriage, or atleast getting pregnant. All the celebrities who've had a kid before marriage have this placement, Angelina Jolie and Shakira are two that i currently remember but I've seen it in the charts of a lot more. And listen, THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS, OKAY.

© martian-astro All rights reserved, 2024

[soulcaretherapist]

Divine Talent

In the Matrix Destiny chart, I will be sharing a thread about the talent arcana energies, which is the position you most frequently ask about. The spot marked with X on the map is what we call divine talent, which represents the talents your soul is inherently born with in this life.

1 - You have many ideas and can generate ideas easily. When activated positively, you have the potential to succeed in whatever you touch.

2 - You can understand other people's motivations, that is, you can grasp why they do what they do at a glance. This gives you esoteric abilities.

3 - You have a good taste and a high sense of aesthetics. You have the ability to expand; you can turn a small task into big projects.

4 - You excel in team management and establishing authority. You have a strong talent for attracting money. If money isn’t coming to you, it means you are activating this area negatively.

5 - You have a talent for learning and teaching. You can master anything and explain everything you know in a way the other side can understand.

6 - Your communication skills and sincerity stand out. You are someone people come to for advice, trust what you say, and listen to your words.

7 - You have the ability to progress quickly in any job, reach your desired goals, and inspire change in both yourself and those around you.

8 - It's hard, if not impossible, for others to lie to you. You can approach everything objectively. You can achieve balance and harmony.

9 - You are more mature than your age, and this grants you wisdom. You have the ability to achieve your inner goals (knowing yourself, realizing your dreams and desires) on your own.

10 - This is a placement that brings luck. You have the talent to manage finances easily and spot profitable opportunities. You can easily attract people to yourself.

11 - Your physical and spiritual endurance is strong. You can do everything at once. You know your strengths and can use them in the most accurate way.

12 - Spiritual practices (like meditation, breathing, reiki) work well for you and have healing effects when applied to others. You have a different perspective and can solve seemingly unsolvable problems.

13 - You can make the necessary changes in every area of life and are not afraid to take risks. You can learn multiple things at once. You have the ability to easily absorb deep and detailed information.

14 - You have diplomacy and mediation skills. You can calm conflicts and maintain your composure during these processes.

15 - By opening yourself to others, you can show them what they cannot see in themselves. You can easily identify others' weaknesses, vulnerabilities, and talents.

16 - You are talented in directing people, organizing, and creating strategies. You can foresee events and chart your course accordingly.

17 - Your ability to express yourself is unique and creative. You can be the center of attention in any field you wish, shine, and stand out from the crowd.

18 - Your subconscious is very powerful. You may receive information through dreams, and your dreams may come true. Your manifesting ability is strong; everything you visualize can come into your life.

19 - You have leadership qualities and can inspire/give strength to others for success. You have the ability to not give up no matter what.

20 - You have good speaking skills and can influence masses. You can create systems from nothing and have excellent analytical skills. It's hard to confuse you.

21 - You have an aptitude for foreign languages and cultures. You can adapt to any environment. You can produce knowledge and content for a wide audience or listener base.

22 - Your decisions and thoughts may be unpredictable by those around you. You influence people with your positive energy. You can turn every tough task into fun and achieve results that will surprise everyone.

[harmoonix]

🌇Sunset-hour Astrology Observations🌇

❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂

🌇- Capricorn or Aquarius in big 3 (Sun,Moon or Rising) is already a confirmed karmic placement to have, the hard thing to know is that karmic debts can be different from person to person, but for sure they are here to end/complete something karmic

🌇 Lilith in Aries/Aquarius/Capricorn really don't like to receive orders from others or just don't like others to tell them what to do

🌇 Lilith in Virgo/Cancer share a common energy and that is the "submissive" energy, they can act submissive and seductive, that tends to attract a lot of people (aswell very toxic people or just dominant people in their lives)

🌇 Neptune trine/sextile/conjunct ascendant can have sensbile skin, their skin can get irritated fast or just having a very soft skin

🌇 Sun - Pluto aspects can have a pretty rebellious energy in them, usually they act how they want when they want and to be pretty moody

🌇 Libra/Taurus in big 3 (Sun, Moon or Rising) and their aesthetic eye for everything around them is admirable, literally they can see some clouds on the sky and think at some aesthetic photos to do

🌇 Leo/Sagittarius in Big 3 (Sun, Moon or Rising + Venus in some cases) can really photogenic like girlll go thattt photossss, the pose, the look, the clothes they wear are always on everyone's look

🌇 Mars in aspects with Jupiter just have uncontrollable feelings when they wanna get dirty. Like is something they cannot control

🌇 Neptune - Venus aspects are too sweet, they often can get so hurt esp in relationships, they don't deserve it to be honest, but sometimes these aspects can create fake illusions about their partners which can lead to so many wrong things

🌇 Venus in the 10th/11th or 7th house love to be complimented, or just spoiled with sweet words by the people around them. They also like to have certain unique nicknames in some cases (Like your friends giving you a funny nickname)

🌇 Uranus in Pisces Generation [2003 - 2010] can invest their time a lot on spirituality/meditation/healing etc, maybe being interested in tarot or special reiki song for healings

🌇 Sun in the 12th house should embrace their spirituality side more, this is an very spiritual placement so try to connect with spirituality it cam help you so much

🌇 There is always a ride or die with Scorpio or Gemini/Aquarius placements, they love to get into challenges, compete and show their intelligence, you are with them or against them

🌇 Sun in the 11th house are actually the people who can listen to their friends stories all the long, these people loveee to spend time around their friends so much and their love for their friends is something else..is something precious to them

🌇 Venus in the 11th house can met their partners in their circle of friends actually??? When a friend told me this one day I was in shock I was like ":0" this cannot happen, just imagine friends to lovers kind of thing, though is very lovely

🌇 Checking someone's chart and seeing that they have Scorpio, Sagittarius or Capricorn placements I just know they are either very revengeful either waiting for the perfect moment to call the wrong people for their mistakes

🌇 Mars in Virgo degrees [6°,18°] can have a good looking waist/body. They can also be slim or jus tall body and usually the waist shines more for them (This may not apply to everyone but I said based on what I heard about Mars in these degrees)

🌇 Mars in Pisces Degrees [12°, 24°] can have pretty good looking hands/nails, very soft or very prominent veins on the hands (esp at men), and the nails can look pretty naturally + people having the impression you always have nail polish

🌇 Mars in Aquarius Degrees [11°, 23°] can have beautiful bone structure esp at legs and hands, (based on my experience most of these people are tall with a very pereftctioned body] Their body loos so good in general

🌇 Sagittarius Mercury or Mercury in Sagittarius degrees [9°, 21°] can be brutally honest. These people don't like to lie or keep hiding so instead they will call out and be honest about everything

🌇 Scorpio and Taurus Moons and their posesive abilities to be posesive and getting jealous fast over small things is insane, esp having a partner with such moon sign can be possessive and sometimes trying to be in control

🌇 Virgo Suns/Moons can end up criticizing themselves a lot of just judging themselves over things they cannot control or just delete over the time. You have to understand certain things happen for certain reasons and the past cannot be deleted but instead try to create a better future for yourself with a good start and positive vibes

❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂❂

🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇🌇

- Wanted to post this post right on time exactly when the golden hour starts to be seen more prominent on the sky, because is also the time when the sun sets for the sun and sooner let the beautiful moon to rule the sky for the next hours

❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️❤️☀️

☀️ Hope everyone reading my notes has an evening/night 🌆☀️ full of warm energy, and watch the sunset if you can 🥰🥰 in my opinion is majestic and one of the most beautiful things on earth ☀️🌆☀️

[crystallilytarot]

Choose a dino! Your life purpose.

Pile 1

You probably had some bad experiences but you are able to overcome it. And after that you will be even stronger, and smarter in a way too. It can be that you will help someone who will have the same struggles as you. Sometimes you can feel hopeless and like you don't know what to do. But you will be able to choose or make decisions more easily, and also you will learn how to stand up for yourself and have boundaries. One of your life lesson is to find balance and harmony within yourself. Be in peace with yourself and with the world. You are probably very creative and you should practice your creativity more, express yourself freely. If you want to have a family, it will definitely happen. I think children and animals are drown to you. If you don't want children, than you will have some significant pets in your life too. You will have a happy and abundant family life. Whatever you wish for, a partner, children, pets, a garden...

Pile 2

There will be some new beginnings in your life, and even if you wanted it, it still can be hard at first. But you have all the ability to succeed. You should have more faith in yourself. You are smart. You are good at manifestation, some of you can have some psychic abilities too. Maybe you are a wanderer, an explorer, but it's not a bad thing, one day you will see clearly what your real purpose is. You will probably move a few times, travel a lot. If you want to go to a foreign country, it will definitely happen. Some of you can have a long distance relationship too. You should embrace your romantic nature and focus more on your inner child too. Have fun, be free, the world needs sensitive, joyful people too! You can have some unique ideas, unique lifestyle, and it's beautiful. Some of you can be some kind of healers too, not neccesseraly doctors, maybe reiki or just you have a healing presence and it will help someone when they really need it.

Pile 3

There will be some hard time in your life, and at that time you won't see that in the end of the day, it's better that it happened that way. Even if it's a betrayal, lie, loss of someone, everything will teach you something. And nothing last forever, hard times come to an end too. There's always a new day, a new beginning. You should accept changes. You will take time for soul searching, seeking answers, and you will have some inner wisdom. You are probably an old soul. You can overcome anything eventually, just have self-control, focus on what you want. You need to be open, be positive, don't give up hope. There's some divine timing and fate working in your life, but looking back you will see that actually you were lucky. You have a soulmate in this life, and that meeting will be something unexpected probably. Be confident, you will be a succesful person.

[thrashkink-coven]

Genuine Red Flags in Spiritual Books, Grimoires, Occult Teachers or Mentors

Very often I see folks talking about things they consider to be red flags for beginners when entering witchy or occult spaces. Here are a few of the things that I’ve noticed over the years that will immediately make me put down a book or step away from a practitioner.

1. Claiming they know every thing about every sect of spirituality / occultism or witchcraft

Simply put, there is no one person who knows the deep inner workings of every craft, of every philosophy, of every practice. The guru that claims to know everything from Reiki to Jewish Mysticism to Native American Spirituality to Voodoo to Acupuncture to Chakra Healing, Tarot, Herb Wizardy, Alchemy, etc etc etc. No. They are lying. Even the most dedicated and wise practitioners devote years into understanding a philosophy or spiritual practice. And especially in regards to closed practices, it is impossible for one person to have read and done it all. Either they are straight up lying or presenting brief skimming over texts or conversation as “years of experience and practice”. No.

2. Constantly trying to convince the reader that they are a God, deity or some inhuman creature like a cosmic elf, mermaid, or angel

Now I don’t mean to confuse this with the idea that some Luciferian or Satanic spaces may adopt that all humans are gods in their own right, or you are the god of your own existence. I’m talking specifically about books that try to convince you that you’re actually a lost race of alien who has been trapped in a human body, or has been mistaken into believing they are human. I’m not going to get into my opinions on star seeds or deity ancestry, what I will say is that very often, and I mean uncomfortably often, these ideas are intrinsically tied to supremacist or xenophobic rhetoric You do not have to be an angel to be special and cosmically significant. You don’t have to be an elf to explore herbal magic, people who push these ideas are very frequently praying on those with delusions of grandeur or other dissociative mental disorders and that’s not cool.

3. Using pseudoscience to push miracle remedies. This includes denying things that are provable to push a narrative, like the fact medication can help the mentally ill.

My dears, please fact check what you read. Please see what educated people have to say about these authors before you take everything they say at face value. As many problems and rightful distrust as there is in the medical industry, usually, if a concoction is commonly dismissed by 99% of medical professionals, it’s usually not because they’re trying to cover up the holy grail, it’s because they know it’s… probably not that good for you or simply doesn’t do what it claims.

4. Trying to convince the reader that with enough practice, willpower, and a donation of $9.99 per month, you too can obtain some incredible power that will allow you to airbend, waterbend, firebend, and basically defy all the laws of physics in general!

The point of most occultism, spirituality and witchcraft is not to defy the laws of physics or to obtain some godly power. There most certainly exists the belief in many sects of spirituality that one can influence their reality through training, but I promise you, anybody that is promoting that they can walk on water is trying to make a fool out of you

5. Inability to disagree, contest, or dissent from the opinions of the mentor, teacher, high priest(ess) or leader

This is how cults form, guys. Confirmation bias is a hell of a drug. If the presentation of different ideas or even questions are met with harsh backlash and censorship, you need to get the fuck out of there.

6. Them automatically making the assumption within a very short time of meeting you, usually presented as psychic intuition, that you are suffering and have a “deep sadness” or energy blockage in your soul that only they can fix.

I understand that damaged people often seek mediums and whatnot for help, and sometimes it genuinely brings them ease, that’s fine and good. But so often I have been approached by people online that claim that “the angels have a really important message for me that they can only give after they’ve received an epayment of just a few dollars”. These are obviously scams, but often people who have been trusted for a reading or service in the past will fabricate these stories to trap a costumer in a loop of service. Some of these claims may be genuine but I guarantee you most are not.

7. Sprinkles of Fascism

No you are not superior to other people because you’re spiritually “enlightened”. No you should not separate groups of people or decide who should and shouldn’t procreate. No mainstream society is not being being deceived by the devil, and the devil is not more prevalent in any one group of people, sex, sexuality, gender, or race. You are not the only enlightened one in a world full of lost people. Mentally ill folks are not demons and trans people aren’t energetically unaligned. You will not inherit the Earth while everyone else dies. Uuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shut the fuck up.

8. The claim that ancient societies of people were aliens. Presenting hoaxes and proven scams as evidence of a conspiracy.

This includes things like using documented hoaxes as evidence that aliens built the pyramids. I’m going to be so for real with you guys rn. This is just racism. It’s insane to think the Egyptians were smart enough to build the society they literally lived in, but nobody doubts the validity of the Roman Empire. Crazy concept but maybe Indigenous people of color aren’t savage idiots. And maybe white people aren’t the only ones capable of having societies and interesting architecture. The thing about this that annoys me the most is that… Egyptians still exist today, and the ancestry that dates back to ancient Mesopotamia and Canaan still exist today too. These were human beings, just like us. The alienation of black and brown people proves how little some people see us as normal people.

9. The promotion of practices that are directly harmful. Self mutilation, disorderly eating, or rituals that can induce psychosis or states of mania.

Guess what you actually don’t have to sit on a mountain naked and eat nothing but sunlight to be enlightened. You can definitely do religious or devotional things like fasting within a healthy degree, but I so so often see people promoting things that will very obviously lead to mania and hallucinations just by design. Starving yourself for two weeks while constantly blasting mantras and doing a bunch of psychedelics isn’t enlightenment… it’s a manic episode. While some devotees may feel comfortable offering blood to deities, this should always be in very small ways, a needle poke, not self mutilation.

10. Trying to do business with minors or promote occult topics to children specifically

Just no. I really dislike the idea of selling spells or promoting deity communication to kids still in grade school. They’re trying to manipulate a young mind into believing their dogma or spending their parent’s money. If a parent wants to share their craft with their child, that’s cool, but people who specifically target a younger audience are suspect to me. This isn’t to say spirituality isn’t for kids, it’s just that content that is created for kids is often created to be surface level and profitable in the algorithm.

11. Shitting on New Age Spirituality

Yeah I said it. This to me feels very much like a let’s hate on anything women, especially young women enjoy. Let’s delegitimize their experiences and paint them all as ditzy girls just clanging their crystals together.

There are some things that New Age Spiritualists do that I’m not a fan of, all of the things in this list. However, that doesn’t make this form of spirituality and witchcraft any less legitimate just because it’s somewhat trendy right now. Go fucking howl at the moon and have bon fires with your besties while you do tarot and talk about angel numbers, I don’t give a fuck.

New Age spiritualists aren’t inherently doing anything wrong or different than what ancient cultures have been doing for centuries, it’s just trendy and profitable now. But anything that young women enjoy will inevitably be exploited by the capitalist machine and that is not their fault. Wicca is still a legitimate form of spirituality and witches are not inherently doing anything wrong by being young women. So much of the criticism against NAS is literally just misogyny.

“I’m not into new age spirituality I’m a REAL witch”

omg please shut up

[thehighpriestexx420]

Their True Self's Feelings VS. Their Ego's Feelings About You

General Collective Pick-A-Gif Tarot Reading

Our True Self is the version of us WITHOUT the programming society has instilled in us and/or the programming our physical body came with. It's your soul, your spirit, your higher self. My experience with my true self can only be described as what feels right.

The Ego can be used as a tool for your true self to use or you can fall under the automatic habits it provides. It's our mind. The brain filter that allows us to perceive reality - more commonly the reality that's physical.

My intention was to pull cards into 2 columns. One to represent their true feelings and the other to represent their ego's. I've found that the message worked when I looked at all of the cards together. If you can discern the cards can be read the way I intended with your specific situation, feel free to let me know!

Take a moment to yourself. Step back from any distractions on the outside & within your mind. Take a clearing breath. Focus your attention within yourself & what you sense. Which gif calls out to you? If it's more than one, than there are multiple messages for you.

Take what resonates and leave the rest. Be aware that the future is malleable - you can choose to follow your true self or any toxic programming you've picked up. The results will follow.

💖 New followers & those who reblog the linked post below 👇 get a FREE one question tarot reading & reiki healing session. Paid services are same hour, first come first serve, & guaranteed between 8 am - 9pm 💖

��️ Tips are also always appreciated! Help me continue helping you by providing me with funds to purchase new decks & stuff that keeps me alive 😊 Cashapp: $coltonicholas ✌️

Pile One :

Their soul is calling them to approach you & express their romantic interest. However, there's something that happened between you that's caused them to stop & truly think about this decision.

They're trying to discern how they can balance their self-love & their love for others. They don't want to get hurt again but they also don't want to miss out on their desired connection with you.

The Universe is telling them the time to approach you is now & that they're extremely supported in this. In fact, this is a part of both of your life's purpose. It's destiny. Every aspect of existence is weaving the path to make this happen.

But they're currently being held back and stalling due to doubt & the fear of hoping just to be hurt & disappointed again. As in, they feel this desire of theirs is too good to be true. Their non-action is out of fear & self-preservation.

Pile Two :

They're not seeing the results they're looking for in this connection. There's impatience. They're looking for answers outside themself rather than within.

You may be dating & haven't made things official yet. They're questioning if you're as invested in this connection as they are because of this. They could be feeling the strong desire to marry you, and yet, aren't seeing these results.

They may be overly focused on the material/physical & not enough on what their soul is saying. They want a successful home life with you while not feeling at home within themself. They cope with this feeling by indulging in distractions. Propping their ego up, shopping, bragging, etc.

They need to be more calm, nurturing, & patient. They feel the need to rush ahead while not considering others enough.

They're overly concerned with others' opinions. They want to be able to say that you're theirs & not fear people questioning the validity of your connection. It's the vibe where people have been in years long engagements. There's often doubt from others and within the connection. "Are they not sure if they want to get married, is it going to happen, etc."

Pile Three :

They're being held back by confusion, the pressure to conform, & structure. It's like they're lost in a land of illusion. They're unable to move on due to this belief they must uphold these rigid rules.

"If it's not broke, don't fix it" is a saying that comes to mind when describing this person's mindset.

They don't want to adventure outside of these old habitual ways of thinking. The unknown is unstable & unpredictable.

Despite this, their soul is desiring a union with you & they feel it - the urge to reach out. Their ego is blocking them from seeing a way forward with you.

For some of you, they want to propose but something is leading them to believe it's not possible. There's a clashing - 2 opposing forces that "shouldn't" go together. So this can look like having a religion where you're "supposed" to be with a member of the same religion, a family disapproving of same sex marriage, or some other value/belief that doesn't approve of your marriage/union.

They've had unhealthy examples of relationships growing up so this also distorts how relationships are "supposed" to look like to them. There's some kind of codependency between you two. Like you're both chained to these toxic belief systems. Change your mentor/who you look up to & set yourself free.

Pile Four :

There's this idea - this hidden gem in their heart. I'm seeing that they need some time away from the distractions of the world so that they can look inside themselves to see what this bright, burning, blossoming passion really is before they offer it to you.

They're scared of things not working out because they haven't seen any indicators it would. Their heart is closed off & as a consequence it blocks them from receiving what they desire. That includes the positive interactions from you that they're looking for.

But I'm seeing that this beginning between you is bright, beautiful, & promising. You both can try to hide what you're feeling, but it's too powerful to be ignored anyway.

I'm seeing that you both share a heart/the same feelings. This connection is within your core. It's designed to free you, reveal your true self, heal you, & to assist you with growth. For some of you, this is your divine counterpart/twin flame. For others, it's a strong soulmate connection.

[moonsunmermaid]

Heavenly guided messages ✨✨✨Pick a Pile

Disclaimer: Please remember, this is just a general reading from the collective, apply how it might resonate and take in consideration that tarot readings are not 100% real, you have the power to change your life anytime. Also please, regarding any kind of health issues this is no game, go to a doctor, I or spirit will never give you any advice regarding your health in this blog.

1-2-3

Pile 1- Reiki Magic

In this moment and age, with all the things going on in this planet earth, heaven wants to assure you you are protected and safe. Angels and your spirit guides want you to know you can trust your intuition, they whisper the best advice possible and you can feel it if you connect to them and your heart.

If you have any practice that helps you connect to your guides, they want you to know they are with you all the time and encorauge to keep going with the practice. Sometimes even when we can't hear, feel or see, faith is imporant. Anyways, here's your message, keep trying connect with them.

Also there's a message from the moon, you can call her Selene, Diana, Artemis, Ix Chel, Khonsu, Hecate... or just the moon itself, however you like to call her, she whispers teachings that benefit you. I recomend you learning about the moon cycles and moon magic if you're into witchraft.

Pile 2- Glitter Wings

Energy sorrounds you and your aura, you are picking up on too much from others and you have to learn to let go of what is not yours. Your love for humanity is appreciated and venerated in heaven, yet you also have to love yourself. Angels don't want you depleted because of the efforts you put onto others!

Mother Kwan Yin, who always helps me , wants to tell you she's there for you too. Maybe this is too specific, but if you're suffering, you can call her and she will try help and allievate your pain.

Try be super soft with yourself and allow yourself to rest your mind as much as possible. Sometimes we need reset days when we don't talk with anyone, listen to anything and we just are. Maybe this is an extreme, and extremes are never ok, but try ligthen outside stimuli and kiet the mind. Do not force it, be kind to yourself, but try relax, please, also when I was reading the cards a huge amount of messages came to me, my ears started ringing and I almost had to stop the readings because it was too much stimuli for me. If this is how you are feeling in life, please, stop for a while and breathe!! (🙏🙏🙏 this is also a message from me )

Pile 3 - Angel Doves

For some reason, you got extra cards... also while I was shuffling the cards I felt a strong pain in my heart. I don't even know how to start, but I feel you, ok? I sense you are now healing from a very toxic situation, but you are determined to achive a goal or a dream, or maybe you only want to be free of this pain. One day at a time, progress takes you to the final goal, not perfection.

There's angels surrounding you to help, they are guiding you through the dark waters of uncertainity and want you to know comparing yourself to others is what makes it harder. They want you to remain calm and look inside, your light is never ending and your heart holds the magic to heal thousand million pains and more.

When we come to earth (or any other planet to be honest) we separate from source and we become individuals. Ego makes us believe we are not in comunication with source, society makes us believe we are not good, we are not God, they tell us God is a separate entity from us. Even in spiritual circles sometimes I heard we are nothing and we are bad compared to angels!!! But what angels want to remind you here and now is you are them. We all are Achangel Michael, we all are Kwan Yin, we all are God. Their energy is within us, and in this case: the energy of a thousand suns is within you, to heal or to achieve any goal. Allow the voice of angels get to you because you are them, you have the power, never foget this, please.

[thespirtualist25]

How can you use opportunities and your strengths 🧿

This is a general guidance, only take what resonates to you and leave the rest.

To book a personal reading - check my pinned post and i also do reiki healing sessions.

Pile - 1 . You guys can manifest easily, also get worn out mentally. You might encounter mean people at work area which drains you. I am don't worry and work hard. The hard work will pay off, the lesson is of confidence that is attached to your career life right now. Spirit channel solutions through your logic. Your work can be very hectic, underpaid and not in good working conditions. I also see few of you are being called you follow your soul purpose - this message is for specific people if you feel something when you read this line then the message is for you. Your strength are you can read people well, easily analyse what will happen, you are not scared to put your full efforts. What you need to keep in mind is - try not letting others take away credit of your work. Someone who can be your friend is a fox and not your friend. More like not loyal I got a lot of gossips too. That friend just use you for favours. I also feel you are quite ambitious. You can manifest your dreams easily. The career field relates to - travel, water, writing, poetry, printing, research, history & monuments can be good for you. Later on you will be getting more clarity on what you find happiness in doing. Some of you can be pilot too, will have to disconnect from some of the people in your life and will be forming new relationships. Your current relationship might not work out - if your partner has a lot of ego. I do see you need to see how people treat you. You are really missing the point on how and why people treat you. That's a gist of how they feed off your energy. Next 12 months are essential for your career. Create vision board , save money and manifest. Your manifestation will come true in upcoming 2-3 years.

Pile - 2. Love is entering in your life in the next 10 to 11 months you will be in a committed relationship. This person will be older than you and for some of you this will be your future spouse ( spirit strictly said some of you not all) . The person can be Taurus, Aquarius and libra. Some of them can have scorpio in major placements. Your connection with the divine is very strong. Your partner can be met through your professional network and at workplace or while travelling. You will travel a lot with this person. The person is practical af and will keep on your feet. So next year January you can expect to meet them I know late. As per your career you guys are used to Underestimating your potential. And you need to get clarity in terms of your goals. Your career can be slightly different from your plans. However your plans will help you keep the foot forward. I do see you need to stop beating around the bush and I also feel some of you need to speak positive affirmations, eat home cooked food, get positivity to make your subconscious mind as such. You are hesitant to align with your goals. You can be very artistic and creative , imaginative and dreamy and also innovative. This is your strength. You get the best ideas in solitude and work best while being calm. You have to stop being indecisive and take your own decisions. Upcoming months along with this can be hard emotionally so you might need a practical advice. Go out to clear your mind and have your own me time. Don't make promises you can't fulfill. Your will power and understanding is your strength. For career you have to be ready to put action and mentally stop self sabotaging. So that you clear the illusions you have created.

Pile - 3. Stop questioning yourself, you do question yourself a lot. You might feel and tell yourself you will always be stuck in the same situation. You have to prioritise your wants. I do feel you are getting a lot more prosperity. Also you need to fear less otherwise you will lose motivation to pursue your goals or others can take advantage of the situation. Your aggression will be very powerful for you. Take physical action don't delay this is the message I get. The world needs your idea. Your future is secure although you are in an insecure position. Some promotions are coming for a few of you. Don't trust people easily with your emotions. I can also feel the spiritual awakening is around the corner for most of you especially males. It could be male in your family so do support them I got this message. Stop fearing failure you are creating more blockages then are there. Wear black tourmaline this will help you at work. And also some people have hidden intentions at work don't trust or help everyone who approaches you - this particular message is not for all but for some of you. Try to work on your emotions so you don't falsely blame yourself.

[tarotbydelilah444]

♌️✨What Does Leo Season Have In Store For You?

hi guys! welcome to Leo season & happy solar return to all the Leos out there. I’m a Leo moon. Hope you enjoy the reading and don’t forget to like, share, and comment what pile resonated for you. As always, sending you love and light✨🤍 - Delilah pile one ✨

crystal for leo season | tiger’s eye

message for ♌️ season | butterfly | you will definitely be going through some major changes and transformations during Leo season, regardless if you expected or didn’t expect it. It’s time for you to change and grow because the old chapter no longer fits who you are in this current moment. Change is necessary in order for us all to grow, even when it feels uncertain and scary. You will be a brand new person in the end. Remain hopeful.

Some of you will be getting into sound healing. You should try out Reiki to help you balance your chakras and even balance your mind, body, and soul. Balance will be a big theme for you, as you could be trying to release certain things in your life that no longer serve your highest good whether it be people, places, or situations that knock you off balance. I see you building strength to fight back against anyone and anything that may have gotten in your way. You will be determined to protect your energy from anyone or anything that tries to destroy your peace. You will be focusing on what brings your strength and stability. You could also find yourself focusing on your outer appearance more than normal. If you been wanting to work on your body, this is your sign to create a workout plan, join a fitness program, take a workout class , work with a personal trainer, or create  your own workout playlist from home to do. Make goals for yourself and track your growth to help you continue your journey. Don’t be afraid to challenge yourself. You will be going through changes, but it’s in your highest favor. Old cycles are closing and new cycles are ready to began, once you accept this change. Everything will be working out in your favor. The universe is on your side and guiding you towards your destiny.

health | you could be a bit disorganized when it comes to your health. Your emotional health could be controlling you at this time when it should be the other way around. You may have a lot going on at the moment and it’s affecting your mental health. You are overextending and exhausting yourself to the point that you cannot think straight. You need to create a routine that can help eliminate any distractions, stress, or anxiety that you may be dealing with. Focus on the things that are within your control and leave the rest. Some of you could be relying on substances/addictions to help you deal with your issues and this is only hurting you. Try taking a break from these distractions and seeking out help from a trusted friend, family member, or therapist. Also slow down, you could be overindulging in too many at things, only you know what it is.

career & finances | make sure that you are making good financial decisions. Don’t spend your money on things you don’t need or that won’t be valuable down the line. This is not the time to make bad investments when it comes to money and career. Do your research and ask for a second opinion before making any financial decisions. You are waiting to see if you will get approved for something (new house, new car, or a new job). It will likely work out in your favor, so give it some time. If you already working, I see that you will be evaluated and watched closely by your superiors to determine if you are capable for a promotion or higher position. Make sure that you are doing your part and do it well because you may get rewarded for your efforts. If you have been slacking, it’s time for you to reevaluate your priorities and get your shit together when it comes to your professional life and finances.

love | you are being asked to take charge of your love life and make the first move. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and express how you feel towards your love interest. Make your intentions clear, so there is no room for confusion. You are seeking stability and commitment when it comes to matters of the heart. If you are single, you will be meeting someone that is older and mature. This person will be able to grant you stability, commitment, and longevity, if you are open up to the possibility. This person seems to know what he/she wants and they expect the same attitude from you.  If you’re dealing with an ex partner, I see that they have been thinking about you and may come forward soon or contact you. You may not trust this person and believe that they have bad intentions. Always trust your intuition. For those in relationships, if you and your partners have been having issues, I see it improving and the both of you will be bringing stability back into the connection.

channeled messages | April (the month/name), someone is sending you evil eye, karma is coming, family issues, Aries, Scorpio, Pisces, Taurus, Leo, Aquarius, and Sagittarius, piercings, glasses, phone number, new phone, new number, incoming phone call or text message, following your destiny, marriage, and commitment

pile two 🌻

crystal for leo season | pyrite

message for ♌️ season | feather |

be honest with yourself. There is somewhere in your life where you haven’t been upfront. You are not being honest about something or this could be someone being dishonest with you about something. You are being asked to speak your truth and give the gift of honesty rather than lying or keeping secrets. the truth will set you free.

Connect with crystals. You guys will be working with crystals or collecting crystals. You will be working with crystals to help you set intentions for yourself or to attract opportunities towards you quicker. Start working with beginner crystals and learning their meanings and their benefits. Use your crystals during your meditation practice, in your home, your car, or on your physical body to absorb the energy you pick up in your surroundings or that can correspond with a specific chakra. You guys could also be budgeting and paying more attention to your finances and expenses in Leo season. Set money aside for expenses in one account and money for minor inconveniences and emergencies expenses. Make sure that you are being responsible and wise when it comes to your finances. For some, you could be wanting to come up with new ideas to generate more money. You could want to start a business and you are researching and creating a business plan to make this happen. Also, work with crystals that are associated with money and prosperity. Use pyrite, tiger’s eye, green aventurine, and citrine. You will be emotionally fulfilled in Leo season. Be ready to be happier than you possible can imagine. Be open to receiving any and all blessings that are coming in for you. You will be feeling more secure and at peace than before. You will also be feeling balanced, creative, and playful during this time. Enjoy it!

health | you will be discovering that you are pregnant in Leo season. So if you needed confirmation, here it is and congratulations in advance. For some, who have been trying to get pregnant, this may be a good time to start trying again or you will be receiving a miracle from the universe. Be gentle and patient with yourself, continue to take care of yourself because your wish will be granted soon. For others, this could be an unexpected pregnancy and you are deciding to keep this a secret for now, it would be wise to tell someone close to you for you to get the help that you need. For others, it may be time for a health checkup or you need to make some improvements in terms of your health. This could be exercising more, eating healthier, and avoiding unnecessary foods. Try to prioritize your health by starting a self-care routine, or making improvements in your self-care routine to help you stay focused and consistent. You will see results over time, if your remain consistent with your regimen.

career & finances | you could be waiting to hear back from a new job or a position that you applied for. The news may be a bit delayed, but you will get the job. If you are applying for a new job make sure that you do your research before applying for the job. This would be a great time to make any changes and improvements to your resume, if you need to. If you are looking to start your own business, it would be a great time to create a business plan and research methods on how to start, manage, and promote your business. Be open to advice and learning new things. When it comes to your finances, you need to make sure that you are paying attention and being mindful of your spending and your expenses. Make sure that you are reading over your contracts or agreements before making purchases or making any financial decisions. Some of you could also decide to go back to school to receive better job opportunities.

love | you are being asked to be patient when it comes to your love life. The universe is crafting the perfect person for you and will deliver this individual in divine timing. You are being encouraged to focus on what you need and want from your partner. Don’t force or rush a connection because you want to hurry up the process to find love. If you are a partnered up with someone, I feel like this person is a divine counterpart and you will be balancing out the connection if there has been any issues or misunderstandings. Love is about balance and harmony, so work things out with your person.

channeled messages | starting a family, building/buying a new home, soulmates, June (month/name), short, someone still talks about you to their friends and family, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Virgo, Taurus, Aquarius, Libra, and Gemini, a truth/news being exposed, rewards from the universe, making amends, red hair, straight hair, secrets and hidden information, clarity, profitable new ideas, and angel number # 111

pile three 🦁

crystal for leo season | citrine

message for ♌️ season | lion | believe in your power. Do you believe in your inner power, so why aren’t you standing in your power or embracing your power. you are capable of accomplishing anything that you put your mind in. You need to start believing in yourself and stop looking for outer validation from others. Be your own cheerleader.

Make sure that your are prioritizing your health. If you have any health issues make sure you are addressing these concerns with your healthcare provider. Some of you should go in for a health checkup to make sure that you are in perfect health, so schedule a doctors appointment as soon as possible. Remember that health is wealth. Start to prioritize self-care. Show you body some extra love and care, if you have been feeling overwhelmed and being abandoning your needs. Try taking a long relaxing bath to help relieve any stress that you’ve been holding in your body. I feel like you guys have been ignoring your body signaling for you to take a break and relax. Honor your body, mind, and spirit by showing it some well deserve tender, love, and care. You will be in a much happier and better place in Leo season. The cloudy days are over and the sun has shined again. All your worries will soon dissipate, and be replaced with happiness, joy, peace, and clarity. Everything will be working out in your favor and will be getting better. You will be glowing and radiating, after a period of sadness and this will attract others to your optimistic and radiate energy.

health | pay attention to your mental and emotional health, as it’s affecting your physical health. Some of you could be dealing with depression, anxiety, or the aftermath of a traumatic event. Make sure that you are reaching out for support if you are struggling. It’s okay to grieve and process your emotions but accept help from others. You don’t have to do it alone. For some, this could be an issue related to your heart. This is the time to listen to your body and give it what it needs in order for you to stay healthy. Limit the amount of stress and give yourself some time to recuperate and recover. Stop feeling guilty for taking care of yourself first.

career & finances | your finances will be more than fine in Leo season, so there is nothing to worry about. Your finances will continue to increase and you will be financially stable. Everything will be a success in terms of your finances and career, as your hard work and efforts have paid off. Continue to be smart with your investments and generating more wealth for yourself. If you have been struggling with finances, I see that your money worries will finally be over, as you can be receive support from others and your hard work will be paying off, so keep up the good work. you could even receive an advance or promotion to a leadership position.

love | your love life might be a mess at the moment. If you are in a relationship, you and your partner could be arguing and in conflict with one another. There is too much pettiness and ego involved and it’s affecting the connection in a negative way and it’s causing lots of unnecessary stress and headaches for you both. If you want this connection to work, try communicating with your partner and discuss what is the root of the issue and work towards fixing it. Don’t let ego and resentment break up this connection, if you and your partner still desire it. If it becomes too much, it may be time to go your separate ways. If you are single, you need to stop self-sabotaging in terms of love, you want to be loved or be in a relationship, but you keep running away from it because you are afraid to be vulnerable or to be hurt. Love is a risk and if you want it, you have to be able to take that risk. There could be a new beginning in love, it’s up to you if you want to take the risk. You should continue focus on healing any traumas you may have experienced in past connections to avoid unpacking it in new connections.

channeled messages | summertime, springtime, Leo, Capricorn, Taurus, Sagittarius and Virgo, green eyes, jealously, new beginnings, ignoring your needs, spiritual awakening, dark night of the soul, heart problems, sacral chakra, lighter complexion, blockages, be generous, treat yourself, counseling/therapy, learning your triggers, clarity, creativity, and setting boundaries

pile four 🧡

crystal for leo season | yellow aventurine

message for ♌️ season | deer |

bring gentleness and grace in every aspect of your life. You need to be more gentle and kinder to yourself as you go through your healing journey.

Clear your energy field. You have a lot of negative or unwanted energies that is living in your aura and energetic field. Remove and release anything that no longer serves your highest good and only invite things that you want into your energetic field. Make sure that you are protecting your energy and cleansing your energy regularly. Work with cleansing tools such as crystals, sage, palo santo, or simply meditate or shower. Dancing can be a way to eliminate any energetic blocks in your body. Feel free to allow yourself to be free and dance, no matter how embarrassing it may be or how self conscious it may make you feel. Have fun. Consider taking a dancing class, go out to a club, dance for your partner or with friends. Just have fun and let your creativity run wild. You will be feeling very abundant and in your divine feminine energy. You will be catering to your own needs, but you will also be open to others wanting to cater to you. You will be embracing your softer and more feminine qualities by tapping into your emotions. You will attract people by your loving and compassionate energy. You will also be prioritizing your self-care and self love to attract things and people to you. You will also create something that you invested a lot of time and effort into.

health | anxiety and fear could be ruling your life at the moment and this is affecting your mental, emotional, and physical health. You need to confront these feelings or emotions that is keeping you stuck in fear. Try journaling or talking to someone about your feelings, as they are valid. You could be fearing the worst possible outcome, which may only be in your head, but it could manifest into reality if you don’t confront these issues and fears right away. You are being asked to release these blocked emotions before they poison your body and become hard to deal with. You may even benefit from a chakra cleanse.

career & finances | you may have to make a choice when it comes to a job, whether you want to stay or go find something better. Don’t be afraid to step out your comfort zone and try something new if you been wanting change. Take your time before making a decision, but don’t take too long or you’ll miss out on opportunities. Weight your pros and cons. Some of you could have to travel for work or whatever you decide to do in terms of career and finances will require a partner to help you achieve your goals. You will also be gaining stability in your finances, if it was an issue in the past. By allowing growth and expansion, your finances will improve.

love | love is in the air, if you are single. Get ready to meet someone that you will have a loving and harmonious relationship with. You and this person will be inseparable and have a lot in common. There is a mutual love and respect for each other. This will be emotionally fulfilling and exciting connection. You will know who this person is because you will feel connected to them before you even meet them. If you are in relationship, expect for you and your partner to become even closer and your bond becoming stronger than ever before. Lots of affection and time spent together. It may be a chance that your person may propose to you to solidify this connection. If you are in separation with someone, this person misses you and is thinking about you a lot at this time. There may be a chance for reconciliation and to rebuild the connection.

channeled messages | Latina/Latino, Leo, Scorpio, Taurus, Libra, and Aries, root chakra, solar plexus chakra, and third eye chakra, darker complexion, blue eyes, protection, soulmate connection, creativity, soft-girl era, new hobbies, project, stop looking, choosing between your comfort zone and something new, 222, connecting to your inner wisdom, and stepping into your power

[theediviners]

𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐏𝐬𝐲𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐜 𝐀𝐛𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐞𝐬

Collaborative PAC between @astrodoll2 , @neptunianrose, @m00nt4r0t , & @daarlingdatura

PILE ONE @astrodoll2

For this pile I’m seeing your strongest psychic abilities is your ability to manifest into the physical whatever it is you desire, you’d also be really good at witchcraft for this reason especially working with herbs and earthly things, a practical routine could suit you very well especially if you’re more of a logical person the more steps there is to something the more you may believe it’ll actually work since your putting effort into something you also without realizing it are putting intentions into it and greater energy which allows the power to manifest. You can manifest very quickly and easily especially with finances and material luxuries. You bring a lot of stability financially to yourself but you attract it most when you yourself are feeling stable and calm within, for as how they manifest whenever you’re generous with your resources and what you have to offer you receive it back 10 fold, you can be very fortunate and attract a lot of good luck but you could lose it just as quickly if you start doubting yourself, becoming worried or rushing/forcing things by being impulsive due to fear, since your mindset has alot to do with what you’re attracting over thinking negatively will do you any favors on the contrary the more you let go the more you bring in, don’t be impulsive but don’t be afraid to be bold and take risks, along with manifesting you can make actual wishes just by summoning your spirit guides and they will abide. How to strengthen this ability, well like I was saying before your mind needs to be at a relaxed state, meditation is recommended for you, don’t hold onto pains or past failures, you really need to let go of a lot of negative self talk or doubts within that create these limiting beliefs and cause resistance to your manifestions, speaking out loud in your room alone what it is you want like making a request to the universe or your guides, subliminals could help, don’t volunteer in gossip since it only attracts that back. Being optimistic and stable in the knowing that it will manifest is how you will bring it to you and once you start manifesting little things and keep seeing it come to fruition it will build your confidence and help you manifest a lot smoother because I see you will be a master at this once you’ve improved on your self worth especially, working on self concept is great but also because I feel like you may subconsciously feel like you aren’t deserving of all these luxuries you could get or feeling like you should work harder because you’ve heard others say things don’t come easy or money doesn’t grow on trees but honestly that is just a mindset which is why alot of people will stay at that point for basically their whole lives, so don’t let it be you, because I see that you’re meant to have all your desires as well all are but for you it will initially come easier maybe because you’ve had past lives where you were extremely good at manipulating energy so it’ll be natural once you get the hang of it. Let go and let flow. PILE TWO @neptunianrose

Beautiful are the gifts that have been bestowed upon you but the best of them all is your healing ability! Your words are melting walls away, caressing wounds, making worries disappear. Specifically, anything that is related to one's childhood and most innocent years can be so easily healed and through your help! You can identify hidden traumas and cuts. There are times when you think you've said the wrong things and get the truth is that you just hit clode to home, even without intending to. I like your energy if I am being honest. Your gift can be used as a weapon as well but that won't ever be the case cause you don't want to create pain. I am reminded of Katara from Avatar and her amazing skills. If you do intent to expand these parts of yourself you could become quite well known for it. There are many energy healing methods, reiki being the first to pop up in my head, which I recommend you to look into. Whichever stands out to you the best can be the gateway to a whole new path that will bring light into your life. Spiritualism seems important for you and your purpose! I usually dislike talking about things as if they are set in stone but you are clearly meant to use your inclination towards the mystical for helping people. Healing can be in itself a way for you to tend to your own wounds and help you process your grief better. I got the six of cups which makes me think that you can specifically access someone's inner child and fantasies. They feel safe enough around you to allow this aspect come to light and be shown to you (and that only tells us what a beautiful soul you have!). I want to say that, as rare as they might be, occasions in which your gift is turned against others are not impossible. Us humans can be defensive when pushed to, even the kindest of all. So don't underestimate your desire to hurt when you yourself are experiencing a big amount of anger. This is just an advice coming from the source to prevent you from causing too much damage (don't forget you are a human though and mistakes can be made).

What I am about to say in this part is very similar to the paragraph above but, with enough patience, you could easily channel any secret or hidden information. You have a psychic ability which you're unaware of that helps you remove the shadows and see what usually lurks inside of them. You have definitely used it unintentionally at times and most likely thought it was just intrusive thoughts but oh my, that is so far from the truth! I do feel like there is more to your gifts that have been revealed today but you must work on these for now before diving deeper.

PILE THREE @m00nt4r0t

okayy so as soon as i lit my incense, the flame was big and continued to grow in size. it was a bit hard for me to blow it out at first, but don't worry, i did lol. to me, this indicates very fiery and passionate energy, and that it must be contained before it gets out of control and engulfs everything in it's path.

what are your unique psychic abilities? i feel like a major psychic ability you possess is the power to avert danger away from you and others. there's this very protective, nurturing essence that surrounds you and basically scares away danger itself. i feel like the reason you have this is because of your emotional, loving and creative nature. you could've gone through some dark, traumatic experiences that have caused you to have this "man-eater" vibe (although the phrase specifies men, i mean it for any gender.) you have a very deep, emotional side to you that is very nurturing and caring, and you protect it with a harsh demeanor. you are a very passionate person and i wouldn't be surprised if you triggered heavy amounts of passion in others by simply just existing and doing your thing. you could be reposting whatever resonates with your energy and this inspires others to step more into the energy that you naturally possess. you are someone who is very influencing, whether you try to be or not. if you have any siblings, whether they're older or younger than you, i feel like they definitely look up to you and admire your style and your way of being. if they're older, then you influence them to indulge in more "youthful" trends and whatnot. okay, i'm also getting that part of your psychic abilities could be making others sick?? like, if they do wrong by you or have ill intentions with you, they become sick or their skin starts to break out, or maybe even someone they love gets sick. you also cause others to fear changes with you? like, whether the change is good or bad, people you connect with tend to be a bit intimidated by you and aren't very good at reading your emotions nor your energy, so they may think that certain things they say and do will cause a transformation in the connection.  also, you have the ability to take on a lot at once. even if you don't think so, you are very good at multi-tasking. i also think that you're most spiritually powerful whenever you're sitting down (or during moments of personal peace and stillness.) you have a lot of passed on loved ones by your side whom are also pretty powerful and they are part of the reason that others get sick whenever they cross you. also, i feel like your power heavily includes your knowledge and your wittiness. you're someone who knows a lot more than they say and this makes you so so so powerful. i feel like people know you know a lot, but they don't know what you know so this can be a bit intimidating to a lot of people. you may also know a lot of secrets which could include other people's secrets and secrets of the universe. i feel like you're more than capable of communicating with those on the other side and you could've been doing so since you were very young. i also feel like your family may be very similar to you in this way, even if they don't believe it. if you have an altar then this is increasing your psychic abilities more than you may have expected it to. lastly… your seductive energy is immaculate and every time you step into this type of energy, it grows stronger and stronger. i'm seeing an aura just expanding and engulfing more and more people within it. i don't want to get to explicit so i'll just say this: if you haven't studied sex magic, you probably should. also, adding your sexual energy into whatever you create will be extremely magnetising, so keep that in mind.

how do your psychic abilities manifest? your psychic abilities manifest in a way that makes others want to cling onto your energy for dear life. people refuse to let go of you. even if they don't speak to you, they will still think of you, check up on you online, ask people about you, be inspired by you, etc.  i feel like there's a lot of people from your past who are "stuck" on you, even those who claim not to like you (they're literally in love with you.) and although i said you avert danger, i feel like danger still lingers. to give you a visual, i imagine danger as some person looking at you through the window of your house; they can't get in, but they are watching. this could be in terms of evil eye and baneful magick towards you. i'm also getting that your abilities manifest in the way that others speak to you and about you. for example, people tend to feel very seduced by you so they flirt with you. another example, people don't want the connection with you to change so they over-explain and basically kiss your ass to stay on great terms with you. this feels kind of obvious but your abilities manifest in forms of creativity and random moments of intense inspiration that you get. if you randomly get the urge to write a song, write a book, draw something or make a piece of clothing, it's because your abilities are looking for an energetic outlet. you may tend to keep your abilities to yourself but they are begging to be released and seen/heard by others (3:33 on my clock) because whenever you do something creating, it is being driven by the powers you have within you and you're pretty much doing magick by creating, even if it is just a piece of clothing or writing on a paper. your abilities manifest in the littlest things you do, whether it be taking a bath, smoking a cigarette, laughing at something funny, dressing up to go out. all of it is, of course, inspired by your psychic abilities because they're so magnetizing that even you tend to get hypnotized by them. however, i do feel like whenever you're feeling extremely angry/sad/bitter, then it can manifest some chaos into your life if you don't release these emotions as calmly and quickly as possible. bottling up your emotions is not at all good for you and those around you because of how powerful you naturally are. i feel like you don't have to worry too much because of the fact that you're very protected, but it's still important to keep that in mind. your abilities also manifest in the way that you love and care for others, so i can definitely see a protective shield around those you love simply just because you love them. your abilities may also manifest in those you love and they become more enlightened in their own ways.

how to strengthen your gifts: as i shuffled an image of someone smoking (specifically a blunt, but could be anything) came into my head, so i think that smoking certain herbs (please study which herbs are safe to smoke) can strengthen your abilities! i feel like even smoking marijuana could be beneficial (when monetized) because it can help you analyze more and open up your mind. but, of course, marijuana does not impact everyone the same, so only take that if it resonates. also, meditate!!! meditation really helps to clear the mind of any excess "junk" floating around in there and helps for clearer intuition. if you already meditate, then maybe meditating for a few more minutes or lighting an incense while you meditate could enhance the effects. deep breaths will help you clear your mind as well. this is a pretty obvious one but the more shadow work you do, the stronger your abilities become. i feel like your abilities get "watered down" after long moments of not doing shadow work; this could be for many different reasons but a specific reason i'm getting is because when you don't do shadow work, you tend to be a bit more impulsive/chaotic therefore your abilities weaken for your own good. your abilities strengthen whenever you challenge yourself and allow some healthy competition into your energy. also, sleep!! when you get the amount of sleep that you need, it's easier to control and hone in on your abilities. whenever you take time to be alone and self-reflect, realign yourself and do shadow work, your abilities strengthen immensely. another way that you can strengthen your gifts is simply by not giving up; this shows that you're more than capable of what you got and that you're ready for more. 

PILE FOUR @daarlingdatura This is an interesting pile, I see that you may be someone who is able to predict loss, disaster, and other "negative" events. You are someone who's abilities are deeply rooted in their emotions & the impressions of energy around them. You're reflective, "like a pond" I heard. It's important that you take ample rest from social situations as necessary. I definitely see here that you may be someone who also knows how to like... take on the minds of other people? You can think through their heads if that makes sense. I also sense that you may be able to channel energy or intentions through your hands to bless, heal, hex, curse, or effect things in some way. It's interesting because I definitely feel like your nightmares could end up often being signs. You may also unintentionally dream walk, I see that you may also be prone to anxiety that isn't yours. It's important you cleanse regularly to avoid any entities taking advantage of you.

I see that you may have many more psychic abilities that you don't fully understand or that are still currently dormant. I definitely see that you are being prepped to develop extremely intense abilities. It reminds me of how in Wednesday her mom is a dove & she's considered a raven. You would be a raven, the way that you tend to pick up on danger & hidden information. You usually see through people very clearly, though at times the images can become distorted if you become close enough to the person. When you become incredibly close with someone there can be a sort of energetic merging. Where you're both in limbo drowning in each other's energy. I heard pathological, your abilities deeply deal with the mind & I feel called to say death as well.

I wouldn't be surprised if you have predicted deaths or if you have dreams where the dead appear to you with messages. I feel this has past life roots, it may be possible that you have a divine connection with death and the dead. You may find as you grow closer to people they are forced to shed old skins and rebirth themselves anew. In some ways you are a catalyst, but in a less explosive way. Your energy reminds me of a snake- which I think is beautiful. In ancient times, especially near the middle east female deities were often depicted as snakes or dragons. So this is definitely giving ancient energy. As your gifts develop you may begin to see/hear dead people, you could also develop insanely vivid visions. Some of the people in this pile have already begun developing this gift. I do have a slight warning here, make sure you regularly cleanse and ground. You are extremely connected & it's imperative that you prioritize your health. Your service or abilities either could already be highly sought after or will become highly sought after.

[mountainmaven]

Just some random thoughts as I know I haven't been very active on here in recent months.

I'm still enjoying volunteering at the library - however I am trying to protect my time a bit more and really limit the days/hours I'm there. Because as of this past Saturday, since March I've volunteered 380 hours. I'm still hoping that it will turn into a paying job next year (I think I'm still hoping for that - it's a little complicated). But we'll see.

My Little Free Library hasn't seen any activity in months but I still update it regularly. I guess I grossly overestimated how much my little community would use it. Honestly since volunteering at the library I should have known better because most of our activity comes from people who don't live up here. Oh well. It's okay, I still like seeing the little library on my property every day.

I'm still working out regularly and feeling so good, and getting strong. I had taken up running in the early summer but had to take a break due to IT band issues that were affecting my knee. But since I've been getting regular massages that has been helping. (so yeah I've started getting massages - the therapist comes to the house - it's SO great!). I hope to start up running again soon. I just need to do it. I honestly never thought I'd enjoy running but even at 56 you can start new things and find out you really like them!

I've also started doing some reiki healing and that's amazing too. I have another session this weekend.

We got our updated flu and COVID vaccine boosters this past Sunday and yesterday I was exhausted. I felt fine, no other symptoms other than an achy arm - but no sick feeling, no headache, no tummy issues - nothing. Just so exhausted that I ended up taking a nap that lasted somewhere between 3 and 4 hours. I have no idea, because I don't know when I fell asleep exactly. I just know I saw the clock at 10:48 AM, next thing I knew my youngest daughter was calling me and it was 3:11 PM.

My spiritual practice is really feeling so natural now, and I love that it's a part of my every day life.

I've started doing art again and that feels wonderful - I don't stress if I'm not doing art every day or whatever, I just let it flow naturally and that's so freeing. Obviously if I was making art to make a living that would be different, but this is just a lovely hobby for me and I'm finally treating it like such.

Reading has been a bit difficult lately, I'm not sure if it's just that my time is being used so differently now that it's harder for me to focus on reading. It doesn't help that I've had a lot of duds lately when it comes to books LOL. But I keep trying and I guess that's what matters right? Again no pressure associated with it and not stressing about it.

I know the world is a massive dumpster fire lately but I can't stress enough the importance of unplugging every now and then and just living your life and doing things you enjoy, and ignoring world events for a bit.

I hope all of you are well, and that you have things in your life that make you feel alive, and happy.

[theic-manic]

Some rough notes for my Vampiric Grimoire (planning stage) feel free to use and/or contribute your own perspectives.

"Energy vampire" is a misused term since all feeding in energy feeding, just in different forms.

So I've made some brief notes on Vampire subgroups I've made for a grimoire I'm planning.

🩸Sanguine vampires

Your blood suckers, these vampires need plasma (in small amounts) to access energy.

Since there's an abundance of literature on Sanguines, I won't reinvent the wheel here, however I'll remind everyone of the importance of consent & safety.

🍆🍑Tantric Vampires

Aka Succubi & Incubi.

Similar to Sanguines, however they feed via different bodily fluids.

The main difference between Tantrics & Psi Vampires (to be covered below) is their need for erotic contact & fluids.

Again, remember consent & safety.

Unawakened tantrics may engage in hypersexual or sex-addict like behaviours.

💔 Emotional Vampires aka Emphatic Vampires

These are usually mixed up with Psi/Psychic vampires as the latter can feed via emotions, in a limited capacity.

The best metaphor for these guys is the movie Monster's Inc. & how the factory converts screams (& later, laughter) into energy.

Emotional Vampires may feed by deliberately triggering people however many discover pleasant ways to feed such has becoming comedians or musicians.

Also typically found in Political & public speaking careers.

They also make great trauma counsellors.

They can feed in a similar way to Tantrics, however they end up getting really hurt and/or manipulating others when hungry...

🔮 Psi Vampires aka Psychic vampires, Pranic Vampires, Strigoi

We're the energy omnivores in that we can feed in the same ways as other vampires however these other methods aren't as effective.

The downside of this is it can take us longer to awaken as Vampires, we may get caught up in the "fluffy bunny" (the love & light toxic positivity) community and/or end up going through hypersexual stages like our Tantric kin.

Unlike Tantric Vampires, we can feed via online interactions & be fairly satisfied.

We best feed when close to someone we can establish a link with, physical touch can also enhance this.

Unlike others, we can distance feed either astrally or via meditation though this takes discipline.

Similar to emotional Vampires we can feed from crowds, though we send out our "tendrils" to nibble from the crowd's auras.

This isn't as effective as "deep feeding".

We can benefit from learning Reiki & other energy work however we must be careful to avoid unawakened vampires who work in those fields.

Feng Shui is critical for our living spaces & we benefit from learning what our Ayurveda Doshas & Humors (Greek medicine concept) are, adjusting our physical food diets according to those.

Unfortunately we are probably why it's believed that vampires burn in sunlight since we are especially sensitive & weakened by the sun & sensitive to other weather events due to the type of energy involved.

That said, due to our relationship with energy we are especially good at Weather Manipulation, witchcraft & energy healing.

While we may be drawn to careers in healing, we're often found in toxic workplaces due to our ability to feed from & transmute negative energy.

While we CAN feed via emotions like our Emphatic kin, we can become really unwell if force fed large amounts of negative emotional energy, e.g. people in crisis.

📝 Note on naming conventions;

I'll eventually expand upon these in my personal grimoire, and once digitised I can make it available either as a Google doc or even a Tumblr post.

I plan on updating the naming conventions to be more accessible to wider audiences

ie each "type" will be given a plain English name, an "old country" name inspired by old myths & a spiritual name for those more accustomed to spirituality.

E.g.

Psychic vampire naming conventions might resemble

Psi Vampire (Plain English)

Strigoi (Old country/mythos)

Prana Vampires (Spiritual)

The fun challenge will be creating a 3-name system for Sanguines 🩸🧛‍♀️

Art by Justin O'Neal.

[esoteriamaya]

Venus in the 8th: More Observations & Tips

Venus 8th House - Their sensuality is potent & is very magnetic. Their allure is contagious, and they tend to have others wanting to worship then. They could understand the dark side of money and how to make it. I see something about sex work being a thing for a few people with this house placement, but most of all it could be that you are aware of how money works in society and dont look it at from a good or bad perspective. You know that money can be made in all ways and its truly what you do with it is what counts. Hidden secrets around relationships and lovers. You might be able to spot when your lovers are walking out on you, you just know. When it comes to everyone else relationships you can see through them, something you learned during your adolescent years. Youre able to pick up on the energies of people very easy, so it is no wonder you're able to pick up things from others relationships.

I notice if you're a woman with this placement others tend to 'hide their wives/husbands' from you. They think you'll steal them, your sex appeal is extremely high so no matter what people will think youre some 'slut'. Sugar daddies may come out of no where for you guys, the 'streets' chose you not the other way around.

For some of you, you could know some pretty successful people in high places. They gravitate to your aura because it is very dark and powerful, so this can be used as opportunity. You can see into their lives and they trust you with what you know. The more higher youre up on the ladder the more hidden knowledge you tend to come across.

Gifted in the occult, you can be healers in areas that have to do with the sexual organs. Can heal others with your hands (reiki) and could also make money off this if you choose.

Last thing I wasnt to say is that you guys can have a lot of jealous women around you. Girl, guy, non binary. Doesnt matter. Its because since youre personal power comes from your sensuality it can shine light on other peoples darkness.

'Like why is this person so pretty?' 'why does everyone gravitate to them and not me?' like... they cant seem to understand what it is about you. You dont have to be some ig model or extremely attractive to be 'sexy' with this placement you ARE it. You are the embodiment of sex appeal.

Tips I would have these placement holders is to hold on to their sex appeal as long as they can because as they mature in life they'll be individuals that will try to make you turn it down. Hold your head up high & never let them see you sweat because trust me they're waiting it on it. If you have any moment where you are vulnerable thats when the vultures come through and try to attack so privacy over your self & your feelings is necessary.

If you are an artist you can sell your art and can get a lot of vendors and sponsors who want to see your stuff. I say this because people some of you with this placement may be prone to insecurity around your artwork however your passion is noticed in your work. So it should be seen in the spotlight because it gives us a chance to feel the passion and hard work in what you've created.

Another thing I will say before I end this, is that love for yourself & the world at large creates more energy for you to live off of and makes your aura stand out from the rest. You guys are actually work really well with community and you should use your magnetism for the workspaces of helping groups that need your compassion and grace.

thank you for reading <3

[ascendingaeons]

Relationships With The Netjeru: Introduction

Lately, I’ve been journaling about my relationship with Set and it gave me an idea for a series of blogs about the Netjeru I work with. Posts like this were what made me begin properly working with Them. A devotional is a heartfelt offering between a person and a deity. A devotional shared has a way of echoing what sings in the heart of another. I’ll begin this series by sharing the nature of my relationship with the Netjeru and what being Kemetic means to me.

I find the Netjeru to be different from the Gods of other pantheons. They are much more relaxed and understanding regarding tradition and what we perceive as insults or mistakes (Set most of all). I would compare my relationships with Them to growing up in a house with a lot of family members. There are times when we laugh or grieve together. There are times when They must be stern or let me do something on my own. There are times when They are disappointed but that can be forgiven by a heartfelt apology and genuine effort. Other times call for greater formality and respect. Still others are ceremonial in nature or very down-to-business.

I am not the best at giving formal offerings or praying at my altar. I don’t always have the time or energy and honestly, sometimes I forget. And that is more than okay. The Netjeru don’t expect that from me and They’ve communicated that very clearly. They’re more concerned with how I’m doing than They are about regular offerings of specially prepared food or gifts I purchased while thinking of Them. That’s not to say those efforts aren’t appreciated. I would love to have more time to have a practice like that. What I have developed is much more organic.

For me, prayer is more of a conversation. There is no right or wrong way to do it. Sometimes it is as simple as asking for a boon. When my partner moved in with me, I had been dealing with nightmares. I would thrash around in my sleep and occasionally wake him up with a smack in the face. One night before bed I prayed to Bast and asked Her to give me restful sleep so that I would stop doing that. From that night on, I slept peacefully. It’s often small blessings that afford the highest gratitude.

There were other times when I asked for an answer or resolution to a persistent problem to which I received what I thought was silence. Sometimes, for Them to act we have to take, at the very least, just one small step away from our comfort zone. The life we want is not always in alignment with ma’at. The solutions we envision are not always going to work with our highest good. The Netjeru always listen. They are never “too busy” to be there for us. But like a parent, They sometimes expect us to take action and do things for ourselves.

There is one thing that every person has to offer Gods and spirits regardless of their circumstances, but it requires a special kind of comfort zone. Provided consent is given, the Netjeru can live vicariously through you. If you would so allow it, They can taste what you taste, feel what you feel, see what you see, and love what you love. What is yours by experience becomes Theirs. It is the freely given perspective of a life well lived that They cherish more than any other offering.

I work with certain Netjeru in my writing and research, shamanic practice, divination, healing, and ceremonial magick. I’ll give a few examples. During reiki, I call upon Yinepu when I need assistance. I have a specific kind of clairempathy when performing reiki. If a client is in a significant amount of stomach pain for instance, that pain will transfer to me. I’ve learned to work with Yinepu in keeping grounded during reiki. It’s similar to calling upon the Archangel Michael as both of Their domains involve mastery of boundaries. 

When in shamanic trance, I’ve had many encounters with Djehuty and Aset offering wisdom or guidance. I blessed two of my tarot decks to each of Them respectively and the tones the decks have are very different. Set has guided my thoughts while writing for many years, planting little breadcrumbs to each “aha!” and I’ve called upon Him in ritual almost exclusively for as long as I’ve practiced magick.

I love and respect the Netjeru as I would my own parents. Truth be told, They were often better than the parents I had. Like any child would, I sometimes turn my back on Them in moments of anger or fear, but They are always right there… waiting. They allowed me the opportunity to venture off and find my own way. They watched smiling as I explored heathenry knowing that in finding myself, I would find my way back to Them. They were not at all jealous of my dealings with the Vanir.

Such profound trust and belief in a person foster loyalty unlike any other. The Netjeru were always, always there for me whether I was happy or sad, weak or strong, successful or not. They were always honest and freely gave the kind of support I needed exactly when I needed it. They brought ma'at into my home, giving me a sanctuary from the isfet outside. They loved and supported me unconditionally, effortlessly knowing the genuine Truth singing from my Heart, something that—as far as people are concerned—only my husband has ever been able to do. That is why I am a Kemetic.

Dua Netjeru!

[elisabethbabarci]

I AM A SURVIVOR

Perpetrators come in many forms and use various calculated abusive methods to control and exert their power over victims therefore, abuse is cyclical in nature but does not take a linear route to heal. Healing involves community and understanding that support is needed on all levels i.e. Family , friends, professionals, volunteers, and community engagement.

Giving survivors their voice enhances their power to recover, and it enables them to reclaim their sovereignty. Victims often suffer in silence but when they awaken to their power to reclaim their life, it is a powerful moment. May my story of recovery empower those who feel dismantled, broken, or are embarking on their recovery trajectory.

“You wanted this.”

“No one will believe you.”

“It is for your own good.”

The escalation of priming can range from degradation, control, erosion of self, dismantling of support networks, paradox of carrot and stick approach, terrorism, violation, and inflicting fear in their victims. Within this article, I will delve into the complexities of sexual misconduct, abuse, and a near attempt to break my spirit.

More than a decade ago, after my fiancé had passed away, I was diagnosed with an extreme rare case of immune system malfunction, where my body rejected or perceived food as a threat, and as a result my neck would develop inflammation from the inside within seconds, resulting in my family members having to rush me to the emergency room. Seeking several medical opinions, there was an inconclusive question of why it was occurring. Finally, after 10 visits to the hospital, an emergency room doctor took a firm proactive approach, ran several tests, and concluded it was chronic inflammation and a narrowing of the esophagus. While seeking council from medical specialists from nutritionists, cardiologists, immunologists, gastroenterologists, allergists, pulmonologists, to rheumatologists, I decided to seek assistance from spiritual leaders within the community which enabled me to examine what was the root spiritual cause of these issues. Along my spiritual journey, I had a few that restored me back to health and aligned me on my path. What was the spiritual message? “What can you not swallow about life?” Suddenly, I was able to start the internal examination of where I stood with my self care, self respect, authority, safety, and autonomy over my own existence, and what I had allowed within my existence perpetrated by others. Over time, the medical condition still persisted which resulted in my Mother asking friends, neighbours, strangers, doctors, and clients if they were aware of anyone that specialized in this further? Unfortunately, within a panic of fear, she trusted a woman who was a loyal devotee of my future perpetrator who enthusiastically stated “I know a spiritual leader that would be able to restore your daughter’s health — he takes a non linear approach and works out of his apartment for comfort.” With blind trust for what this woman said, my Mother instructed me to drop my current reiki practitioner because she was not helping, and suggested that I visit this new individual.

Upon meeting this individual, there was an aura and energy of instant dislike and mistrust for him. He was abrupt, rude, abrasive, and contradictory. “You do not trust me because I represent a father figure, and I am a man, which I feel is the root of all your issues — you just do not trust, do you understand? Do not listen within — it will misguide you.” Not correct — within my life, I formed trusted, secure, and loyal friendships with paternal figures within society and my social network that demonstrated safety, honesty, trust, and compassion. However, unconsciously, I questioned my own judgment over time as he continuously made cases how men should not be trusted and how I had a trusting naive nature, “Could he be right?” …. In hindsight — no! My inner radar was setting the alarms off in my head. During our first encounter he assured me that it would take a few sessions to delve into what was causing the issues as he mentioned we need to peel the onion to get to the core root. Little did I know, this step would become my nightmare as this individual was sent into my life to erode my confidence, metaphysically peel my layers of trust and security, and teach me the fundamental lesson about not giving away my power and to learn, recognize and comprehend how important discernment is for our human existence.

Within the three years I was under his care, I was sexually abused within his bedroom and massage room, administered food and drinks which resulted in me feeling numb, calmer, which resulted in trips to the hospital due to unknown pains around my appendix, ovaries, and sacred parts. Once the trust eroded, threats, priming, disassociation with life, internal emotional pain, stagnation, physical / mental / emotional / verbal / financial abuse, and even worse, a sense of powerlessness succumbed me — I was paralyzed.

My perpetrator’s distortion of reality — He constructed a lie that he was being “Stalked” by his “Older — neighbour — female — widow — friend”, who was as he claimed “Extremely obsessed with him”, and “Would not leave him in peace.” He stated that she was “Dangerous,” “A client that was not getting better,” “Always showing up at his apartment uninvited”, “Wanting to date, and eventually get married to him, with a white house,” “Texting and phoning him non stop,” “Getting into physical altercations with him in his apartment,” “Spying on him,” “Controlling his every movement,” “Getting close to his parents and now his daughter who does not like her,” and that he was “Seeking council from clients and friends as to how to escape from her,” when he “Had enough money.” I felt scared for him at the beginning, as he told me that he was in a “Dangerous situation,” and he further went on to tell me, “She wants to know everything about you, she does this with every client, if she talks to you, do not trust her, avoid her, and ignore her.” Truth revealed — He lied about his entire life. This woman was a high ranking professional, who did not live in his apartment but adjacent to it, was supporting his business in all aspects as a silent investor, she promoted his business to everyone within reach, as he was healing her, healing members of her family and close friends. The woman was funding his entire existence from lifestyle, raising his child along with her own as by his request, paying for his child’s tuition, paying for his food / clothing / vehicle / and apartment where he “treated” clients. It was later disclosed to me, that supposedly he was a man that experienced severe abuse from his previous marriages, had severe relations with his siblings, was married once where he abandoned his child and wife, ran away from his long time partner (second marriage), to become homeless, and then rescued by this woman who enabled him to have a second chance at life. My main questions that always remained in my mind about her were, “Why did she try to get close to me?,” “Was she intentionally profiting from the distress he was causing to others?,” “Did he harm her younger children or even worse his daughter?.” Near the end, she verbally threatened my Mother and myself to scare us at his request, relocated her children out of the country and remained there for a while with him, temporarily left behind my perpetrators ill child that was mysteriously getting sick under both of their care — alone. Why did they both do this? One will never know. After I was under another’s care during my recovery, her cousin — that was my Mother’s old client that recommended him in the first place, tried with her husband to reconcile with my Mother and myself, asking, “How I was?,” “What happened?,” “Did you know he extorted money from both of us?,” “We will be seeing him less,” “Not to drag their name into it,” “That I was in danger,” “That her cousin was always mentally ill, abusing her position and those around her” and that “He changed once she got closer to him and his daughter.” With mistrust, we did not accept their apology as I was skeptical … I was suffering from PTSD — No amount of words could account for the torture one had to endure under his care.

Priming begins with entrusting an individual that you feel has superior abilities or knowledge to actively help, cure, or creates an illusionary atmosphere of safety. Priming then starts with gaining the victims trust, asking several questions about their lifestyle, friends and family network, gaining any information that can be used against them. It then leads to control, “What are you wearing,” “Express yourself like this,” “Do not go near these individuals,” “Do not tell your family,” “Schedule appointments later in the day so I can drive you home,” “Lets start with one appointment a month,” “Lets begin with 2 appointments a month, “Let me schedule you every week,” “Tell your Mom to stop driving you and come on the train and subway,” “Gain independence from your family,” “Quit your current job,” “Don’t travel,” “Do not trust police,” “Wear clothing like this, not that,” “Become part of “our” family,” to “You can not escape.” My perpetrator regularly stated “You can come to me with anything,” “Give me your phone,” or abruptly taking my phone away from me to a) encourage “technological detox” or would take it without my knowledge — gaslighting me that he did not know where it was, to “Give me all of your passwords to your e-mail accounts, so I can help you tell your friends to lightly give you space.” The most severe infraction was he was creating a false illusion and construct that I was in perpetual danger and that I should fear every element of my life. It then escalates to light touching, hugging, “Let me try this …”, “Stand against the wall and allow me to walk close to you — we will see if you have any residual hesitation for intimacy”, “Oh you are sore? Let me massage that,” to escalating to “Take off your clothes” … and more.

My perpetrator controlled nearly every aspect of my existence. The problem was, I enabled him to take away my voice, power, and I felt as I was on autopilot. There were times when he would tell me “No one will believe you,” “Look who I am dating, she will use every method to discredit you because I control her,” and “I only take on women because men do not understand me,” and “You wanted this, you deserve this, you deserve to be punished.” The worst comment was “If I did not return, he would harm my family or knew a network of individuals that would cause harm to those I loved.” For many years I questioned, “Why did I not leave?” … fear. When you enable your oppressor to become a force beyond yourself or authority, you place and characterize them into an omnipotent position of dominance and control. Abuse is not the natural state of our existence, it is brutal force to compel those that they perceive as weak into subordination to align with their motives, plan, or cohesive goals. Perpetrators lack empathy, accountability for their actions, and have no remorse for the damage and destruction they cause. As a society, we must examine the root of what fosters and creates these individuals rather than questioning the victim as to “Why did you stay?.” Logically, rationally, and proactively there needs to be a firm examination of what are the fundamental core roots that enable those who seek domination to feel they are above authority of the law.

Why am I writing this? After years of recovery in silence with the assistance from the legal realm and abuse and trauma recovery specialists, I learned from these professionals how to recover, awareness, education, and how to establish a safe nurturing environment— within my healing recovery I discovered that I was a victim of priming. The psychological, ethical, and moral implications of this form of violation can cause one to question their existence, their worth, their value, and recovery. Priming is a form of psychological violation and manipulation to lure the victim into subordination, till you effectively break the spirit to allow incremental abuse, violation, degradation, rejection then acceptance, sexual violence or misconduct, and to have the end goal of being a broken shell of yourself that is malleable for their pleasure or means.

Once I had become aware that my perpetrator was impersonating me by sending e-mails and text messages to my family, friends, and himself I began to feel helpless and trapped — He even refused to give me my phone back insisting that he buy me a phone that only could reach him. He then proceeded to create an illusion of a distorted reality of safety, asking for financial assistance from myself to seek a new home, and after a certain amount of time was suggesting that I “Date one of his clients,” and further added, “But you will still permit me to touch you as I please.” I decided to reveal to those closest to me my experience. Near the end, I was terrified of my perpetrator from all of his threats, I could not mitigate the impact of the abuse, and I was becoming broken— once you are in the gyre of sexual abuse — your whole perception on life shifts and you truly do not recognize yourself — you are no longer the strong, confident, courageous woman, you become paralyzed in fear.

After having several medical issues with my body as a response, feeling numb and broken, and weighing 100 pounds with my body giving out due to all the stress and abuse, I ended up in the hospital again, which was my wake up call that I needed to get assistance to recover. During my recovery, I reported my experience and was finally in an environment where I could heal my internal and physical wounds. I was not mentally or physically stable to withstand trial and was encouraged to recover and move forward as many individuals that experience rape have a high risk of suicide after they confront their perpetrator. Along my journey, I was under the care of specialists that enabled me to foster growth, evolve, and gain my strength back and examine the core roots of why I may have allowed this to infiltrate within my existence and most importantly learn inner peace, self forgiveness, and the ability to vocalize my experience to help others. No one deserves to be perpetrated, abused, silenced, degraded, violated, sacrificed, broken, demoralized, or to question their worth or existence. I learned that I am no longer a victim but a survivor. He might have broken me sexually but he does not have my power.

I understand the importance of recovery from destruction. My recovery fostered within me strength and resilience when I learned the importance of forgiveness, and that my self-worth and value was not diminished by the acts of another. It is fundamental for a survivor to learn that we are not our circumstances, and that we can overcome all challenges within our life. I believe when we work together as a community we can transcend trauma.

As a survivor, I understand the complexities of recovery, and I want to help others.

When we face our fears and challenges we become resilient. Violence at any level is significant and impactful as it causes fragmentation. It is essential that support is administered to victims who have experienced any traumatic event. Victim safety, wellbeing and recovery are essential in the rehabilitation process. To give survivors a voice in a safe environment helps rehabilitate and stabilize their equilibrium and mind. When one is dedicated to learning structured recovery and safety methods, courageous and flexible to delve into stressful situations that caused deterioration, and within time accept insight, enables one to regain their strength and balance.

It is paramount that a community comes together to help survivors overcome challenges. By helping survivors extract only the lessons and wisdom it will help them transcend the pain and injury and foster forgiveness to take their power back. Most importantly, any victim of trauma needs to learn to trust themselves again. Giving back to the community and assisting those in need enhances the comprehension of the multifaceted nature of trauma recovery, and the wisdom assists in learning how to help individuals in critical emergency situations. Unity consciousness helps the victim recover faster by acknowledging that they are not alone, free to express themselves in a safe environment, and have access to support networks with resources. Having a network that is strong, discrete and that provides the victim advocacy during their transition to safety and healing is paramount because we are stronger together than we could ever be apart.

Self forgiveness and forgiveness of others liberates. It is important that survivors understand that there is more light than darkness in the world. Survivors need to comprehend that their self worth is not dependant on what happened to them in the past and that recovery is possible. You are the light.

As a survivor, I comprehend and understand the complexities of the healing process, and I hope to be a representation for others that recovery is possible for anyone that experiences the devastating impact of sexual abuse.