#aaaaand here's part 2!!! ^^

[onehappyanon]

pint-sized detective, exhibit B-2 (exhibit B-1)

bonus ran:

[saltynsassy31]

Frye Fest - Final Countdown

<- Previous - Part 19 - Next ->

[19/20]

♡Back when it was just us♡

👋Team Paper👋

Splatfest World Premier 27-08-2022

[Master Post]

[byoldervine]

Types Of Writer’s Block (And How To Fix Them)

1. High inspiration, low motivation. You have so many ideas to write, but you just don’t have the motivation to actually get them down, and even if you can make yourself start writing it you’ll often find yourself getting distracted or disengaged in favour of imagining everything playing out

Try just bullet pointing the ideas you have instead of writing them properly, especially if you won’t remember it afterwards if you don’t. At least you’ll have the ideas ready to use when you have the motivation later on

2. Low inspiration, high motivation. You’re all prepared, you’re so pumped to write, you open your document aaaaand… three hours later, that cursor is still blinking at the top of a blank page

RIP pantsers but this is where plotting wins out; refer back to your plans and figure out where to go from here. You can also use your bullet points from the last point if this is applicable

3. No inspiration, no motivation. You don’t have any ideas, you don’t feel like writing, all in all everything is just sucky when you think about it

Make a deal with yourself; usually when I’m feeling this way I can tell myself “Okay, just write anyway for ten minutes and after that, if you really want to stop, you can stop” and then once my ten minutes is up I’ve often found my flow. Just remember that, if you still don’t want to keep writing after your ten minutes is up, don’t keep writing anyway and break your deal - it’ll be harder to make deals with yourself in future if your brain knows you don’t honour them

4. Can’t bridge the gap. When you’re stuck on this one sentence/paragraph that you just don’t know how to progress through. Until you figure it out, productivity has slowed to a halt

Mark it up, bullet point what you want to happen here, then move on. A lot of people don’t know how to keep writing after skipping a part because they don’t know exactly what happened to lead up to this moment - but you have a general idea just like you do for everything else you’re writing, and that’s enough. Just keep it generic and know you can go back to edit later, at the same time as when you’re filling in the blank. It’ll give editing you a clear purpose, if nothing else

5. Perfectionism and self-doubt. You don’t think your writing is perfect first time, so you struggle to accept that it’s anything better than a total failure. Whether or not you’re aware of the fact that this is an unrealistic standard makes no difference

Perfection is stagnant. If you write the perfect story, which would require you to turn a good story into something objective rather than subjective, then after that you’d never write again, because nothing will ever meet that standard again. That or you would only ever write the same kind of stories over and over, never growing or developing as a writer. If you’re looking back on your writing and saying “This is so bad, I hate it”, that’s generally a good thing; it means you’ve grown and improved. Maybe your current writing isn’t bad, if just matched your skill level at the time, and since then you’re able to maintain a higher standard since you’ve learned more about your craft as time went on

[leashybebes]

living at the edge of the world (2/2)

part 1 | ao3 version here

aaaaand we're done. needs a polish but it should be on ao3 early next week if anyone prefers to read there!

The hospital moves around him.

That's how it feels. Like Buck, still in his turnouts, is pinned and at the mercy of gravity (gravity pulling at the chopper, fighting with mechanics and engineering and winning, always winning and - no) while the whole world moves around him, able to go on somehow, while he's just - here. Noises blur and blend into a background roar that fades under the sound of his own heartbeat pounding in his ears, the lights are too bright, his hands hurt from how tight he's been balling them into fists to stop them shaking. 

Tommy had disappeared through those doors into surgery with a crowd of doctors and nurses around him and even knowing that he wouldn't be allowed, Buck had tried to follow only to be - gently, kindly, firmly turned back. And now he's sitting here, him and Tommy both victims of gravity, and Tommy might as well be on the other side of the planet for how far away he feels.

Time stretches and compresses around him, meaningless waves of seconds and minutes and centuries.

He still hasn't cried.

Hen shows up first, with a bag of his clothes and a hug that he collapses into.

"They won't tell me anything," he says, muffled into her shoulder. "I'm not - not an emergency contact."

"Okay," she says. "Go get changed. I'll talk to them."

Buck blinks and he's in the bathroom, dressed in the clothes Hen must have taken from his locker.

His turnouts won't fit into the bag. He remembers they had the same problem after Maddie and Chim's wedding - Tommy's turnouts too large and too stiff to fit in a bag. Buck had run them down to the Jeep, part of him thrilling at the sight of Tommy's name, right there on his backseat. He flips his own turnouts inside out to try to keep the mess off his clothes.

Blinks and he's back in the waiting room.

"He'll be in surgery for a while," Hen says when she sits back down next to him. "His emergency contact is on the way, we'll find out more then. Sorry I couldn't get more out of them."

"That's okay," Buck says, and his voice comes out croaky and weak. He clears his throat, but doesn't have anything to say.

Hen puts her arm around his shoulders and it takes him a beat to lean into it.

"Tommy's tough," she says, and he nods, trying not to remember how scared Tommy had looked, how scared he'd sounded, those awful moments in the ambulance where he'd - where he'd had to be brought back, because - because he was gone.

"I should have told him," he says. 

"Hmm?"

"That I love him. I should have said it. Hen, why didn't I say it?"

"You'll get the chance," she tells him. "You've gotta believe that."

Some indeterminate period of time later, Chim arrives, side by side with -

"Sal!"

He looks harried, still in his uniform, like he came right from his station on the other side of town. Buck only met him a couple of times when he and Tommy were dating, didn't know he'd be the emergency contact, but it makes sense. Tommy's cousin lives near Portland - shit, someone should call him, Buck thinks - and it would have to be someone local.

"Hey, kid," Sal says. "You got here quick."

"We were at the scene," Hen says, her voice heavy with a significance Buck can't parse right now.

"Ah, hell. Alright. Hang tight."

Chim sits on the other side of Buck, him and Hen like brackets, holding Buck together. Buck thinks they're talking but he can't hear it, can't look away from where Sal is at the nurse's station, talking seriously and quietly with someone Buck can't see. 

"Can - can someone let Eddie know?" Buck asks. 

"Already did," Chim says. "Maddie's dropping Jee with Anne and John and she'll be here as soon as she can."

Buck nods, draws breath to say something about Tommy's cousin but it sticks in his throat when Sal turns and heads back towards them.

"Okay," he says. "He's still in surgery, probably will be for a bit yet because of some internal bleeding and they want to set the breaks they can while he's under, too. They sound hopeful, though. They said the care he got on the scene was top rate, really pulled him through. Guess we have you two to thank for that," he adds, glancing at Hen and Chim.

"That's good to hear," Hen says. "I'm gonna do a coffee run, update Karen. Sal, you still milk, no sugar?"

"Aw, Wilson, I'm touched. Usually yeah, but put like, four, five sugars in there for me, okay? Could be a long night."

"Gross," Chim says mildly, but it sounds like a reflex.

"Buck?" Hen prompts. "You want anything else?"

Buck shakes his head mechanically. His stomach hurts. Set the breaks and internal bleeding ricocheting around in his head. 

"Okay," Hen says gently, squeezing his shoulder. She exchanges a glance with Sal, who takes her vacated chair next to Buck as soon as she stands.

Time does its thing - swooping, contracting, passing with no new information. More people trickle in as the hours pass. 

Maddie sits next to Buck and holds his hand. Bobby hugs him and makes awkward small talk with Sal. Lucy and a couple of other people from Harbor trickle in and take up seats around the room. Buck's phone vibrates intermittently in his pocket but he can't bring himself to look at it.

All he can think about is Tommy. Tommy looking so scared. Tommy bleeding and crying and saying how glad he was to see Buck. 

I love you, Buck thinks, hoping wildly that Tommy will hear it somehow.

Finally, finally, an exhausted looking doctor steps through the doors and says, "Family of Tommy Kinard?"

Everybody looks around from where they're seated, talking in twos and threes. Chim nudges Lucy awake and she flails a little. Sal stands to meet the doctor. Buck wants to stand too, but he feels like he's made of lead, his heart pounding so hard in his chest that it's all he can feel. He can't read the doctor's face at all, can't hear what she's saying, can only see that her mouth is moving.

"So he's gonna be okay," Sal says, and then - Buck doesn't know. Sal's saying other things, people are talking, making relieved noises, but he can't hear a word of it. His ears are ringing, his head is spinning, his heart feels like it's going to burst out of his chest.

Buck's breath rattles in his chest, and dimly he hears Maddie's voice.

" - ck? Buck? Hey, it's okay, just breathe," she urges. 

And oh, there they are. There are the tears. It's a good job he didn't manage to stand before, because he's pretty sure he'd be on the floor by now if he had. He presses the heels of his hands into his eyes, lets Maddie hold him from one side, Bobby from the other, doesn't think about the other people in the room - half of them little more than strangers to him - and cries and cries.

Once he's settled down - once he's cried himself out - he realizes that the room is a little less full. 

"Where'd - " he croaks, and clears his throat. "Where'd they go?"

"Captain Harman and Lucy have gone to update the rest at Harbor," Maddie says. "Chim's collecting Jee, and Hen's gone to swap over with Karen. She'll be here soon. Eddie called a couple times."

Buck nods. "I'll call him back later."

"Wash your face, kid," Sal says, not unkindly. "We can go sit with him if you want."

Buck starts to launch himself to his feet but finds himself pressed back into the seat by Bobby, who's holding out a pre-packed hospital cafeteria sandwich and a protein bar.

"Eat something first," he orders, and Buck reluctantly agrees. Even that little movement had been enough to make him feel dizzy. He chokes down the food even though it's so much sawdust, and eventually he finds himself in Tommy's hospital room. 

More tears threaten to spring to his eyes at the sight - the cast on his arm, the bulk under the covers of what must be another under the covers, the stitches near his hairline, the IVs, the machines, the beeping. He breathes through it and hesitates before Sal shoves him towards the seat next to the head of the bed. He drags it around a little so he can sit at Tommy's side, carefully taking hold of the hand on his uninjured arm.

"Jesus fucking christ. Kinard and his hero bullshit," Sal mumbles, sounding shaky for the first time.

"You need to sit?" Buck asks, not looking away from Tommy's face.

"For a second," Sal says, collapsing into the other chair. "I need to update Gina and the kids. I spoke to the staff, you can stay."

"Thank you," Buck says absently. 

Time continues to pass. Staff and second visitors come and go, and thankfully no one even suggests that Buck should move. Lucy drops by with food at one point, assuring him it's lunch time, and sitting with him while he eats. Chim comes by and tells him about the last time he was waiting in a hospital for Tommy, drops off a Get Well Soon card from Jee that joins the growing little cluster on the table next to the bed.

When he's left on his own with Tommy at one point, Buck gets up to pace the room, stiff from sitting in hospital chairs for what must be going on double digit hours now, if it's not already long past. It's when he sits down that he notices the fluttering of Tommy's eyelashes. It could be nothing, he tells himself, as he holds his breath and watches, his hand hovering over the call button. When Tommy's good hand starts twitching, when he tries to lift it towards the mask on his face, Buck slams the button.

"Hey," he says softly. "Stay still for me, baby. You're in the hospital. It's okay, someone's coming."

A nurse appears in the doorway and Buck retreats from the bed. He feels like he's more present in his head now than he was before, mentally taking notes on the nurse's conversation with the doctor he summons, on what they both say to Tommy and to him. As they're leaving, he fires off a text to the group chat, then puts away his phone and takes Tommy's hand again.

Those beautiful blue eyes, still a little hazy with painkillers, turn to him.

"Evan."

"Hey, Tommy. You scared the crap out of us," he says. Tommy's hand, shaking a little, lifts to his face, strokes his thumb over Buck's cheek like the tears are still visible.

"Sorry," he croaks. "Needed a week off and really didn't wanna use up my PTO."

Buck laughs, shaky and a little wild, presses his cheek more firmly into Tommy's hand. "You dick," he says fondly. "Here."

He grabs a glass of water from the bedside table, holds the straw steady for Tommy to take a couple of sips.

"Thanks," Tommy says, sounding a bit more like himself.

"That's okay," Buck says. 

"Were - you were there?"

"Yeah," Buck says, and Tommy's eyes close briefly.

"I'm sorry," he says. "I - I should have been less - I was being selfish - "

And Buck - he can't stand to hear that again. Can't stand to hear Tommy calling himself selfish for using what he probably thought were his dying breaths to try to comfort Buck.

"I love you," he says. 

Tommy's mouth opens. Closes. He frowns as though he might have heard that wrong.

"W-what?"

"I don't know if you remember, I - I said we'd talk? In the hospital?"

"I remember," Tommy says. "But - "

"We will," Buck promises. "We'll talk. We have so much to talk about. But the last - jesus, the last 12 hours, I guess, I've been sitting there with all our friends, and I've just been thinking, I should have told him. He should know. So. Now you do. I love you."

"Evan - "

"You don't have to say it. It's okay. I know it's a lot. I know I'm a lot. But. I was sitting out there, with Sal, and Lucy, and your captain - she is scary, by the way - and Hen and Maddie and Chim and Bobby and everyone, and I just couldn't stop thinking…does he know? Like does he know any of these people love him? Does he know I love him?"

"Well," Tommy says after a beat. "Now I do."

"Now you do," Buck says. His phone is blowing up and he starts to reach for it, but Tommy squeezes his hand to keep his attention.

"Hey. I love you too," Tommy says. "I want - I want us to talk, but I'm so tired, I just - I love you so much. I love you now, I loved you when I left, and it scares the shit out of me."

"Me too," Buck admits, ignoring the way his voice cracks.

"Be brave together?" Tommy suggests.

"That sounds perfect," Buck says. "Go to sleep, honey. I'll be here when you wake up."

"I know you will," Tommy says, and he smiles.

tag list! which idk, i'm not 100% sure is working? i'm sorry!!

@geddyqueer @adiprose @peapodbond @poppyspoppy @stolemyhheart @screamlet @buck-unbewildered @beanarie @chococara25 @fenrirscarsback @hyperfocusthusly

@trombonechurchill @thegingerparty @setmeatopthepyre @rcmclachlan @espressotonicc

@untitledbychoice @sunnywithachanceofbi @onceuponatmi @tistai @blitzynatural @laundryandtaxesworld @mubsterstuff @samjohnssonvt

[sageshell-draws]

part1 part 2 part 4 part 5

Aaaaand here's part 3 of the short comic I've been working on for fun. These short comics are mostly for character studies and figuring out the story in general so there might be some plot holes and errors in general moving forward so bear with me. If you have questions just let me know.

So we have Kayde cooking up some grub for a rightfully concerned Bryn. She doesn't know what to make of the mysterious human that rescued her earlier but will continue to keep her guard up for now.

And Kayde, being the good guy that he is, decides to give her the space she needs to feel less scared of him. He doesn't mind, although he wishes he could get closer and get to know his tiny guest a bit more.

And it looks like he has some knowledge on making healing salves, and oddly enough, salves that heal fairy wings. How and why does he know and specifically, a recipe Bryn thought only her close family knew? Bryn definitely wants to know more about him and how he came to know such an intimate piece of family information.

[wicked-twin-twister]

Twewy textposts 11. feat. Twewy Spoilers.

Never thought I'd use an ad for one of these. Although, Square if you are interested, my DMs are open.

And that's a wrap on Season 2. Thank you everyone for reading. Textposts will return at some point in the future. - Witt

link to masterpost

The delightful RG Shiki sprites were made by bluerainbowart, used with permission. Here’s a link to their tumblr, where you can see the sprites and their other art: https://www.tumblr.com/bluerainbowart/179486515353/aaaaand-heres-part-2-of-the-sprite-edits-use?source=share

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 8 part 4

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

as usual, I'm billy. WE WOULD LIKE TO KNOW, JAC SCHAEFFER

jen filling the gaps with her own headacanons, i see you girl

they're kinda doing their own little agatha deep dive, lol. she's a fascinating specimen, okay? don't you just want to study her in a petri dish?

billy, who's definitely not been projecting his mommy issues on a whole coven (three dead, several unlocked traumas) and hasn't been following agatha around like a lost puppy in need of a mentor: it'S nOT LoYALitY It'S AnALYSiS

that's agatha's entire son, dear lord. 'maximoffs are so dramatic' my ass.

YOU'VE BEEN TRYING TO VIOLENTLY SHOVE HER IN THE WARM EMBRACE OF A COVEN FOR THE PAST THREE TRIALS. for fuck's sake, william.

he's acting so mature and cynical when in fact he's so hurt about the people who died and about agatha's betrayal. he's putting up barriers, he's trying to trick himself into not caring, when crying and letting himself mourn would be much healthier responses! in other words, he's learning alllll of agatha's shitty coping mechanisms.

no but I won't shut up about this, it's the kind of psychological response that really fascinates me. billy has had to learn to lie and censor his true self because he doesn't want to upset his parents. he went through something EXTREMELY traumatic (reincarnating in someone else's dead body? hello?) and he can't process it with the kaplans, he knows it would hurt them too much.

so he finds agatha who is, on paper, someone who can absolutely understand what he's been trough and could totally help and guide him. he's tried to win her over, he's tried to open up, to understand her and to be understood in return. and agatha, DESPITE LOVING THIS KID SO FREAKING MUCH, is so EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED that she has rebuked almost every attempt at a deeper connection. and when you do that to a kid, not only you hurt them, you teach them by example. billy is not mature enough to be the bigger person, he sees agatha hurting him, he'll want to do the same. that's the kind of shit parents imprint on you that will be hell to unlearn as an adult.

agatha, who is - I promise you! - truly hurt by billy's words: ahahaha ouch!

I want to strangle her

one moment of silence for jen who's now alone and stuck in the middle between these two

agatha has somehow managed to sell billy's immortal soul to her ex wife while ALSO breaking her own heart AND said wife's heart in the process. and she's having A TRULY NORMAL ONE about it.

aaaaand she goes straight for jen (no pun intended). starts slow and bratty with some kindergarten insults.

OUCH, AGATHA. WHAT THE FUCK?!! AND TWIRLING YOUR HAIR?!

YOU FUCKING BITCH.

oh dear lord look at jen's face. this is actually the first time I see everyone's faces (fuck you lighting department) and it's making agatha's behavior even harder to stomach. and yes by the way, this scene is absolutely a metaphor for microaggression. knowing that jen's big moment is coming is only a half-consolation.

also agatha falling on her face, that's maybe a quarter of a consolation.

of course it is. this is the green witch trial, it's about the circle of nature, it's about life and death beginning and ending and beginning again.

here comes the tantrum!!!

now she yells at billy. and he scrambles to justify himself. this is funny but also SO FUCKED UP??

lilia when billy makes a mess: that's okay baby I got you.

agatha when billy makes a mess: oh are you having a problem? I'M GONNA MAKE IT ALLLLLL ABOUT ME! I'M GOING TO MAKE IT FUCKING WORSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(fuck she's literally my dad. jac schaeffer I'm sending you my therapy bill)

so, anyway. if a parental figure does this to you? they're being vile and immature. I don't care if they've got their own issues, this is abuse.

(and frankly, learn to recognize this pattern in friends and partners and family too. but it's especially egregious when it's done to a literal child.)

and billy going from apologetic to stone faced. barriers up. he needs to protect himself from her.

while agatha huffs and puffs, jen quietly gets on her knees when she sees the shoes. the camera goes from sharon's shoes to lilia's to alice's.

you guys, this episode is... it's so good? it's not in-your-face like episode seven, but it's doing a lot of subtle things that are getting under my skin

agatha of course plans to barrel through her problems like a rouge zamboni, and just look at jen's reaction! I'm astonished at what sasheer zamata is accomplishing in this scene. I admit the first time around I was too fascinated by hahn chewing scenery to look anywhere else, I got a poorer viewing experience for that. jen has had all her walls up, she's been doing her one note mean girl bit for seven episodes. look at her now. she is crumbling.

god I love me a show that takes very funny characters and let you enjoy them only to pull the rug from under your feet and go: now let's examine why all their funny traits are fucked up trauma responses!

JESUS CHRIST AGATHA

agatha notices billy looking at the shoes and of course mocks him about it. what are you going to do, pay actual respect? cry and properly mourn? like some weak baby???

pay attention now: billy gets mad, and agatha suddenly looks at him with interest and, dare I say, expectation? was she provoking him on purpose?

yes, yes she was. that's the evil of agatha harkness. and I'm not saying her tantrum wasn't real, she was absolutely upset and she relished pouring all her spite and anger and desperation into it. but agatha's theatrics are always happening for a reason. when she's alone she's much more subdued; when she's in public, she vents out her overwhelming emotions trough a big fucking show, so she can make it everyone's else problem. that's the equivalent of when an abuser throws a tantrum and somehow always ends up breaking your stuff, never their own. it's both self-soothing and a scare tactic, two birds with one stone. that's why she went after jen and immediately taunted her about lilia. her words were precise and on target. she enjoyed watching jen squirm.

and yelling at billy just now? it was another one of her calculated risks. what billy is going to do next is anyone's guess, but at least they're not stuck on the Road any longer.

I don't know if I'm making myself clear enough. it's like, how can agatha be so smart and such an idiot at the same time? because she's a coward. because she chooses to. because the alternative is facing her own fucking issues and admitting the truth.

and the truth is scary. the truth is too awful.

next up: billy lands them at the morgue.

great job there, agatha!!

go to episode 8 part 5

[mewnewew]

Sir Crocodile x Chronically Ill! Reader Pt.6

Aaaaand here's part 6 too. Here's where our poor reader has an attack in front of Crocodile.

Pt.5

Tonight had to be one of the worst attacks of your disease. You were in the tub, gritting your teeth in pain as the pain just kept ringing. As in it came in waves, and you were irritated. You wanted to stab someone, to be honest.

The warm water helped, but goddamn was this annoying. The attacks didn't come as frequently thankfully but when they did, they hurt like a bitch. The nurses your husband had hired had managed to help you till the tub, filling it with warm water and giving you pain relievers but you had taken some 2 hours ago, and you needed to wait for 30 minutes before you could take it again. You tried not to snap at them but you were pretty sure you had, and you felt guilty. Which wasn't helping by the way.

You were in pain, your hair felt awful, and you were just so angry at the situation. That seemed to be just the time when the Crocodile walked in.

You looked at him and raised an eyebrow, starting to try to grab a towel to cover yourself with. You were naked after all.

He waved your antics away, eyes looking away. He sat on the edge, smoking his cigar "Don't move"

"I'm trying to cover myself" You snapped.

He paused, then huffed "I won't look"

He turned away, his back to you.

You left the towel, put it back on the rack, and hissed as you rested back on the wall of the bathtub.

"Motherfucker" you whispered under your breath.

"Never took you for someone who cussed a lot," He remarked, a hint of genuine surprise in his voice.

"Yeah well- oh fuck!" You yelped. The surge of pain passing through you right now seemed to feel like a spark of lighting attacking you. You curled into yourself.

He snapped his head to look at you, concern in his face. "What? Do you-"

"I have to wait for 30 minutes before I can take my next dose of painkillers" You croaked, pain evident in your tone.

He reached out but hesitated. "Can I....touch you?"

You turned your head to meet him, blinking confusedly. "What? Uh, no."

"Fine then"

"Is this the worst you've ever felt?"

"No, but." You sighed, "It's the worst I've had in a while."

You didn't know it, but he felt helpless. He hated that. He hated seeing you this way. He knew you did have similar attacks earlier in your marriage but he had been reassured that it was manageable. But this......

You turned your head to look at him, a bleary sort of look in your eyes. Quietly, you were wondering if he was checking you out since neither of you looked at the other when changing.

"Why are you here anyway?"

He lets out a puff of smoke, pausing.

"I....wanted to check on you," He says, quietly. You know that he would not be caught dead saying that with an audience, which is probably why your nurses were not checking on you since you sent them out quite some time back.

You raised a hand, catching him and studying it. You needed some distraction, and talking wasn't helping. Your hands felt better, so you took a chance. His hand was much bigger than yours. Along with much more weathered, probably from the sand he controlled. He kept his hand loose, allowing you to study it. It seemed cute to him, the differences in your hands. Yours was smaller and not so weathered.

You looked at him, then cocked your head to the side. "What's the time?"

He looked at the clock outside the bathroom. "About 30 minutes past 6"

You sighed. "Help me out please"

He nodded, his hand supporting your elbow as he helped you up from the bathtub, you grit your teeth, feeling the waves of pain slightly increase from coming out of the warm water. He hooked your towel, handing it to you as you stepped out. You felt his presence close to your body, and knowing the difference in terms of size between your bodies, you idly wondered what differences would be there. You were aware that he could very well see your whole naked body, and you wondered when that secret wall broke between you. When did you stop having an issue with it?

Helping you outside, you were met with the nurses he assigned and he left your elbow, and you could feel the loss of that warm, weathered, loving touch. You knew he could have very well pushed for something back there. He hadn't and a part of you wondered whether he was as curious yet interested in your body as you were in his.

Soon you were feeling much better, having taken your painkillers, your medicine, and at the end of this attack. You were quite exhausted, your painkillers making you drowsy, another effect of them, and thus a perfect time for a nap. But you wanted to try something. So you moved through the house and found him in his study.

He seemed quite busy, signing paperwork which had a small mountain of the same decreasing at a steady rate.

"Hey, can I come in?"

He looked up and nodded, before taking a long drag of the cigar. Releasing a cloud of smoke, he asked. "What is it?"

"I'm feeling sleepy" You mumbled.

He blinked, raising an eyebrow. ".....And? I'm quite sure we have a bed"

"Can I sleep on you?"

Now both eyebrows were up as if not believing what he was hearing. ".....On me?"

You huffed and moved forward. Coming over to his side, he automatically pushed the chair a little backward for whatever you wished to do. You clambered onto his lap, leaning on his torso, facing sideways, your legs hanging off his knees, and hugged the hook close. This gave him pause. No one had ever wanted to be close to his hook. For good reason too. Yet here you were, hugging the thing to yourself like it was a teddy of some sort.

When he looked at your face again, you found that you had fallen asleep quite quickly as well. Soft snores emitted from your lips, you looked quite peaceful.

Later when Daz would poke his head in, Crocodile would flash him a look of caution, his coat slightly draped on you as well. Fast asleep on one of the most dangerous men in Alabasta.

[rogerrrroger]

Aaaaand part 3 of dragon merc au!! Soldier,

Medic,

And engineer (I struggled with his colours so much 😭😭I still am not sure about them )

Now I have the designs done I’m gonna put them in some situations so badddd, I also wanna do pauling and other side characters 😳

Part 1 here

And part 2 here

[taleeater]

Fragile Part 7

Sorry for the wait! It was hard to focus while writing this chapter, so I might be editing it for mistakes here and there. I hope you like it! :] <3

Generation: Bayverse TMNT

Tmnt x Reader Fanfic

Pronouns: Gender Neutral (except ‘dudette’, 'miss', and ‘princess’)

Warnings: injury, broken limbs, violence, drowning, not proof read

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

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You were laying dazed on the cold metal floor. In too much pain to focus on anything else besides breathing. You heard a commotion, voices muffled through the thick glass. At least inside this tube they couldn’t touch you anymore. Your mind strayed to the turtles. You weren’t able to save them. You weren’t able to do anything. You just hope they can somehow get away safely. That April and Casey can somehow save them.

“I won’t ask again…. Where’s (y/n).” Leo growled. He grit his teeth as he lowered his stance, ready to strike.

Baxter Stockman was quickly typing commands into the program on his computer. Karai stepped in front of him and drew her katana.

“Out of your reach, Turtles.” 

“Aaaaand, there!” Stockman hit one last key on this computer and a red light started to flash on the tank, bringing the turtle’s attention to the crumpled form inside the glass. At the same time a multitude of files and programs started closing on the screen one after another, Stockman’s signature digital self-destruct program. Baxter stepped away from his computer and lifted his arms up triumphantly.

The sound of rattling pipes overhead catches your attention. 

“Ha! You’re too late, Turtles. For years, the Foot Clan has sought out the means to fight you mutants on equal footing. And now, we have our secret weapon! An endless supply of pure mutagen!!!” 

You heard a loud beeping sound, then a click, and the squeak of metal.

A gush of icy water pours down on you from above. The sudden cold shocks you and marginally distracts you from the pain. You pull yourself to the edge of the glass away from the heavy stream of water coming down from above, slowly starting to fill the base. You take a shaky deep breath and bang a fist on the glass. No use. Dizzy and numb, you look outside the tank for someone, something, anything that might help you. That’s when you see them.

And with dawning horror, they see you.

“Guys….?” You press your wet hand up against the glass. They’re here! They’re safe!!!

“(Y/n)....? (Y/N)!!!!” Leo shouts and lunges towards the tank. He tries to rush up to the glass but Rocksteady blocks his path. There’s blood on your cheek, and even a good distance away he can tell you’re in bad shape. 

“OUT OF OUR WAY!” Raph roared at Bebop and Rocksteady, crossing his sai in preparation for a fight.

“Uuuh hey guys? Why is (y/n) in a giant fish bowl…?” Mikey asked, nunchucks at the ready.

“They ain’t comin’ out anytime soon, short stack.” Bebop said with an evil grin. 

“You turtles totally fell for our trap!” Rocksteady chuckled.

Donnie immediately noticed the computer hooked up to the tank’s controls. He tried to subtly sneak past Bebop to get to Stockman but Karai stepped forward and blocked his path.

Karai pointed her sword at Donnie. “The Foot will be unstoppable.”

“And I will FINALLY get the recognition I deserve, for single-handedly creating an entire race of superhumans that will rule over the city!!!” 

“You’re crazy!! You don’t even know what kind of side effects that mutation will have on regular humans!” Donnie activated the electricity at the end of his bo staff, ready to fight Karai to get to Stockman. 

“I do have to thank you turtles for activating their mutant gene. Without your help, none of this would be possible!” Stockman’s laugh echoed through the large room. He waltz over to the canister filling up with the distilled mutagen from your blood. “We originally got (y/n) by a…. foreseeable mistake. But to our surprise, they survived where others had failed. And yet- their results were incomplete. Their animal DNA wasn’t materializing no matter what we did to them. So we came back to New York, where the population could supply us with countless more test subjects.” Baxter said cheerfully, popping the lid off the canister. “But now that we have the results we wanted, we have no need of them! We can preserve (y/n)’s body in a special chemical compound that will put them into a permanent hibernation. No need to worry, their body will be harnessed for science!” Stockman’s laugh was deep and evil, and to everyone’s shock-

He dumped the canister of mutagen over his own head.

Karai lept back out of the trajectory of the splash. Baxter’s laugh increased in volume as he began to morph and change. His head and eyes grew large, his body shrank, little papery wings sprouted from his back, and he mutated into a giant mutant fly. 

Bebop and Rocksteady were stunned by the transformation. “Eeeeewwww… he turned into a bug?” Bebop whined.

“Nasty!” Rocksteady shook his head. Neither of them were paying attention to the turtles so Raph and Donnie covered for Leo and Mikey to make a break for the tank you were in. By now it had filled enough that you were starting to float.

“We’re here babe! We’re gonna get you out!” Mikey reassured you. 

You whimpered helplessly. You were having a hard time keeping your head above water, not really able to swim with a broken dislocated arm and broken ankle. 

“Stay back!” Leo sliced at the glass, and Mikey hit it with his nunchucks as hard as he could, but their attacks barely left a scratch!

“Guys! We have incoming!” Donnie yelled as Stockman had started flying around the room, maniacally laughing as he swooped down and kicked the back of Mikey’s shell, almost knocking him over. 

“Dude, gross!” Mikey protested. Stockman looked to be drooling some kind of acid substance from his mouth.

Bebop and Rocksteady had recovered and started to charge towards them. Leo and Mikey had to jump away from your tank to avoid getting trampled. 

“Donnie, that glass is as hard as steel!!” Leo jumped up and kicked Rocksteady across his cheek, then retreated.

“What’re we gonna do? (Y/n)’s tank is already half full!” Raph shouted. He was using his sai to hold back Bebop’s tusks as he tried to charge them. 

You were doing your best to calm your breathing enough that you could float, but every time your head ducked below water you panicked. Your body was exhausted and protested against your desperate movements, but you needed to survive long enough for the boys to break you out.

“Donnie! See if you can turn off the water!!! I’ve got Karai.” Leo ordered

“Mikey! It’s you and me!” Raph called over, clanging his sai together and shouted a war cry running up to strike Rocksteady. 

“What?! What about the bug brained dude??!! Eep!” Mikey ducked as Stockman flew over his head. He looked down and realized he was kneeling at the feet of Bebop, who had taken the black taser out of his pocket.

“You wanna taste too, little man?” 

When Bebop flicked on the taser, Mikey saw the small stains of fresh blood on the pointed tips that buzzed with electricity. He looked back over to you struggling in the tank and how heavily injured you looked.

He saw red.

Mikey had a rare moment of true anger as he jumped to his feet and knocked the taser out of Bebop’s hand with his nunchucks, and in a flurry of rapid hits he beat back the warthog. He finished him off with a powerful roundhouse kick to the head.

“THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH MY BAE!” He shouted triumphantly.

Raph looked back to Mikey with wide eyes, proud of his little bro for letting loose. “Woah. Way to go Mikey!” He ducked a hit from Rocksteady and punched him hard under his chin. Knocking him out cold. 

Leo was crossing swords with Karai. She was a skilled fighter. But he was much stronger than her. While he pushed her back with a heavy strike, she slipped on some of the mutagen that had spilled on the floor, allowing Leo to take advantage of the opening and disarmed her. He flicked her sword out of her hand and knocked her back. She glared daggers at him, quickly recovering. But seeing as Bebop and Rocksteady were knocked out, she opted for a tactical retreat.

“This is just the beginning.” She hissed and ran out of the lab door. 

Stockman was buzzing around your tank, still laughing maniacally. 

“You turtlezzzzz cannot defeat the mighty Dr Stockman!! I am invincible!! I am-“

Donnie turned on the taser at the end of his bo staff and vaulted it at the annoying human insect, striking him and electrocuting him, knocking him out of the air to fall on the floor with a gross splat.

“Good thing I always carry a bug zapper.” He deadpanned.

Donnie went back to trying to hack into Stockmans computer. He managed to get past the firewall with his hacking program, but he discovered that all of the interfaces connected to the tank control had been erased. 

There was no way to stop the tank from filling up completely. Donnie would have to write a whole new interface from scratch to control the tank.

There was no time.

You were running out of air, trying desperately to keep your head above water as the tank was almost full to the top. You took in one last deep breath just as the water consumed the last of the space. You held your good hand over your mouth and nose hard, trying to hold in the air, and floated down towards the bottom of the tank. 

No more air.

“(Y/N)!!!” 

“ANGEL CAKES!!!” Donnie and Mikey yelled out in panic.

Your eyes snapped open, hearing their muffled voices outside the tank. You swam over to the glass and met eyes with Raphael. He had picked a spot and began punching at the glass over and over again with his sai in his fists.

The needled jabs just managed to scratch the surface. 

You looked at him sadly through the glass. He was stressed, sweating and desperate to break through. Mikey had grabbed a chair and had chucked it at the glass from another spot but it just bounced off and broke on the floor.

Leo was standing behind Donnie with his hand on his shoulder, but his eyes didn’t leave your face. 

Time was running out. You were choking on the stale air in your lungs. Head getting dizzy from lack of oxygen. You removed your hand from your mouth and pressed it up to the glass, some bubbles of air escaping your mouth. Your eyebrows knit together to concentrate on not breathing in the fluid in the tank. But you were suffocating and in pain. 

It was hard.

You looked back up at Raph, and forced a smile on your face. You felt sad. You didn’t want them to see you like this. They felt so far away. 

Darkness was consuming your vision. The last remaining bubbles of air escaped from your mouth and your eyes slipped closed. 

“NO!!! NO-! (Y/N), STAY WITH US.” Raph pounded his fist hard against the glass. 

“DAMN IT.” Donnie frustratingly slammed his fist down next to the keyboard, his head falling into his hands. None of the lines of command coding he was typing in were working.

Leo left Donnie’s side and strode up to the tank.

“Move.” Leo ordered as he came up behind Raph. He unsheathed his swords and began slicing at the glass again. It was barely making a scratch. But combined with the small dents Raph had been making, he was slowly chipping away at the surface.

“Leo! If you can manage to cut 1.2 centimeters deep, it should weaken the glass enough to shatter with enough force!” Donnie yelled from where he was still furiously typing into the stationed keyboard. His attempts to unlock the system all in vain. 

Leo and Raph worked together to stab and slice at the weakest point in the glass until finally-

*crack*

A small fracture appeared in the glass. 

“There!!” Donnie called out. Raph and Leo switched to charging at the glass and ramming it full force with their shoulders. Over and over as the cracks grew wider and wider.

Mikey came over, and with a hand on Leo’s shoulder, the leader stepped aside to let his little brother help. Mikey joined Raph and rammed the glass again with such force the crack split all the way across the glass. One more strike-

The glass shattered on impact.

The gush of water that burst through swept Mikey and Raph off their feet. The floor of the lab flooded, and your body washed up on the floor. Lifeless and unmoving.

“(Y/N)!!!!!!” The boys all yelled. 

Leo reached you first, falling into a kneel at your side. He ripped out the two needles from your back and held you in his arms. Donnie rushed over and slid down into the other spot at your side, his goggles pulled into place as he quickly checked you over.

“They’re not breathing. Put them down flat, now.” Leo obeyed and laid you on your back. Donnie first pressed down on your diaphragm to check for water blocking your lungs, then began compressions. 

The room was dead quiet all except for the sounds of Donnie’s whispered counting as he pressed down on your chest. He paused, opened your mouth, pinched your nose, and breathed into your lungs. 

Mikey was nervously walking around you back and forth, and Raph watched you from a distance, a vacant expression as he watched your face for any sign of movement, pleading with himself for you to be okay. 

After what felt like an eternity, you coughed. Leo quickly rolled you lay on your side. You spit up water, gasping for air. You felt like you were coughing up a lung full of ethanol. 

Mikey cheered and Raph took a deep breath, covering his face with his hands. Donnie fell backwards onto his butt and pulled his goggles off his head, so incredibly relieved you were breathing. Leo rubbed your back comfortingly as you got your breathing back under control.

Once you got a suitable amount of oxygen back in your lungs, you whimpered. Your throat was burning and a pain in your stomach and chest made it hard to breathe.

Leo picked you up again, and held you close to his chest. Your eyes fluttered open and you winced at the bright light from the ceiling.

“Welcome back.” Leo said with a smile on his face.

“Leo…?” Your voice was quiet and scratchy. You looked around at Donnie, Mikey, and Raph that all came into view around you and Leo.

“Guys….?” You felt barely conscious. Head foggy and tired like you were still under water.

“We’re right here.” Donnie assured you, reaching down to pick up your good hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

All the fear and emotion of drowning and being captured suddenly crashed down on you all at once. You sniffed and big tears gathered in your eyes.

“I was… so scared… I thought I was going to lose you….!” You hiccuped and sobbed as Leo held your trembling form tightly against his chest.

“Shhhh, it’s okay. I’m here. We got you.” Leo soothed, rubbing his hand down your back. He buried his nose into your damp hair and held you tight.

“You had us worried there for a minute!” Donnie was smiling at you, soft and relieved. Mikey was standing behind him rubbing tears out of his eyes.

“Let’s get you home.” Raph said, kneeling down behind you. 

“Wait. I need to splint their arm and their ankle first. Mikey, can you find me some-“

*crack*

“Will this work?” 

Mikey had already broken off the thin legs of a chair across the room. 

“Yeah that works fine.” He pulled out two rolls of gauze from one of the pockets on his belt, and took the offered sticks from Mikey, who knelt down by your feet. 

“What’re we gonna do about him?” He asked, motioning over to Stockman’s twitching form across the room.

The brothers all sneered at the fly mutant with similar levels of disgust on their faces, finding him rather gross. You smiled.

“Just leave him there, we can worry about him another time.” Leo offered, adjusting you in his grip. You winced terribly when your arm was moved. 

“….Is ...your arm dislocated?” Leo asked you, holding you upright in a sitting position, now thoroughly checking you over. 

Donnie and Mikey were working together to splint your ankle, Mikey holding up your foot while Donnie wrapped the splint to it.

“Let me see that.” Raph placed his hands on your shoulder and you clenched your teeth and whined quietly at the sharp pain.

“Leo, hold them still for a minute.” 

“Just hold onto me tightly, it’ll be over in a second.” Leo hugged you close, wrapping an arm around your good side.

Raph got hold of your tender arm, and with practiced ease, popped your shoulder back into place. You cried out loudly and buried your face in Leo’s shoulder, taking deep breaths. 

Raph tried to rub the soreness out of your poor shoulder. “Good job, princess. Now let Donnie get a look at that break.”

You hesitantly detached yourself from Leo, your shaking red and swollen arm was carefully picked up by Donnie, who set the splint and carefully wrapped the bandages.

“I’ll be able to get a better look at it with the x-ray machine back at home. For now we just have to be really careful not to jostle them too much when carrying them back.”

“I got em.” Raph volunteered. Leo looked to Raph, wordlessly nodding his head for his brother to take you from his arms.

“Careful of their arm….”

“Got it.” 

Without much effort, Raph scooped you up in his big arms. You winced as a sharp stabbing pain radiated through your stomach as you were held close to Raph’s chest.

Something was definitely wrong.

“I’m sorry, princess. It’s just until we get you home.” Raph apologized. Leo led everyone quickly out of the lab. 

Once back out in the hallway you had entered from, you noticed with visible shock the literal sea of bodies that covered the floor. Foot ninja. They fought through all of them, just to get to you.

Everyone exited the lab, careful to stick to the shadows as the sun began to rise. As the turtles made their way for their home, your stomach burned worse and worse with a white hot pain that radiated through your body. The movement of the city passing you by made you become dizzy, and your head felt like it was spinning. You felt nauseous and incredibly tired. 

“Hey Raph….?”

“Yeah princess?”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save you guys…. You had to save me instead….” You weren’t making any sense. Raph could barely hear you as the wind whipped past his head. You just felt so tired.

“Hey, stay with me, princess. We’re almost there. It’s okay.” Raph didn’t know what the right thing to say was. But your eyes were starting to slide closed.

“Can we…. Can we watch Princess Bride again…. When we get home….?”

Raph smiled at that.

“Yeah. We’ll watch it as many times as you want, short stack.” He didn’t care if his brothers teased him for secretly liking the girly movie. He didn’t care if he had to watch it with you a hundred times. He just wanted you to get better.

“We’re almost there. How you holding up?” 

Silence. 

“(Y/n)…?”

“Mmh?” 

Your eyes were closed.

“Come on, wake up, we’re almost there.”

He was desperate. 

“Mm…hm…” 

You hummed, but your eyelids felt too heavy to lift. You felt yourself sinking into a dark liquid abyss. You could no longer fight the pull.

“(Y/n)….. (y/n)? Hey…! Hey, no no no no no, you gotta stay awake. Come on princess…! (Y/N)!!!”

You felt Raph try to shake you awake, felt his muscles tense as he pushed himself to go faster. 

“We’re almost there, hold on…!”

“Hold on….”

Darkness overtook you.

Part 8

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[katyawriteswhump]

love and other catastrophes at the Omega Cafe (4.2/8)

Aaaaand here's part 2 💚 💚 💚 

Summary: Steve is a runaway Omega who gets a job at an Omega café, where he’s basically paid to curl up and purr in Alphas’ laps. It’s legal, and he earns a living, rents his own place. He’s getting along fine for a packless Omega. Then Alpha rockstar Eddie Munson turns up for an hour of ‘kitty’ petting, and shatters Steve’s fragile little world…

Rating: E; No major warnings; Tags: omega steve, alpha eddie, a/b/o dynamics, fluff and angst, sexual content 💚 

Chapter 1 on tumblr (also index post) Chapter 2 on tumblr Chapter 3.1 Chapter 3.2 Chapter 4.1

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Chapter 4.2

Chrissy watched Eddie like a hawk as he approached the chais-longue, and…

…dropped to one knee in front of it.

Steve’s jaw dropped.

“Steve,” said Eddie. “I’m sorry. It seems there’s a lot you don’t know about me. Did I tell you that impulse-control wasn’t my strength?"

“I think it’s better than mine,” mumbled Steve, dipping his gaze. Eddie’s sweetness and sincerity was as crushing as anything. Especially as this was undoubtedly, a ‘I’m off, have a nice life, Omega,’ kind of speech. “I’m really sorry. I made a complete moron of myself.”

“No, you didn’t.” Eddie’s hand hovered over Steve’s, which rested, still trembling, on his knee. At the spark of near contact, Steve looked up sharply. “May I?” asked Eddie.

“Uh, yeah?”

Eddie took Steve’s hand properly in his large, warm, wet one, setting Steve’s senses reeling giddily.

“Steve, I had no idea my music would trigger you like… that. I ran, because…” He shook his head, scattering a fresh spray of raindrops into Steve, who shuddered. “Look, I am used to taking what I want, when I want. It’s not a great way to go about life. I’ve been working on that, I swear. Tonight, I… ahem, I guess, you tempted me a little too far, Honey. I almost took something I shouldn’t have.”

“I guess.” Eddie’s damp thumb chafed his hand, and Steve struggled not to cry. Eddie had come to the café for relaxation, not sex. Steve had proven himself a wanton little hussy, one that didn’t even know what he was doing. Clearly Eddie had figured that out, and now this was over. His brain was so busy catastrophising, it took a moment for it to process what Eddie was actually saying:

“Steve, I’ve never felt a pull to an Omega like I’ve felt toward you. You deserve to be courted properly.”

Steve’s chin snapped up: “Say what?”

“I would like to court you, Steve.” Eddie’s gaze captured Steve’s and held it. “Is that something you would consider?”

“Yes… yes! I’d like that very much.”

OMG OMG OMG!

Steve whiplashed from misery to undiluted joy. If he hadn’t been so stunned, he would’ve unleashed the highest, most excited squeal of his life. Chrissy, however, was doing that job for him— transformed from killer-kitty to a bundle of bouncing, jingling excitement.

Steve blinked hard. Okay, reality check. He dabbed beneath his eyes, because his mascara must be wrecked: “Are you on the level? You don’t know anything about me.”

“You know nothing about me.” Eddie chuckled gently. “It’s one of the many things I adore about you.”

ADORE! HE ADORES ME! OMG HE IS LITERALLY TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE!

“I’m a runaway,” blurted out Steve. He felt he needed to share something, to at least prod at the barriers remaining between then.

“Stevie, everyone has a history. You need to know mine soon enough, and then you can tell me everything when you’re ready—in your own time.”

“You know that… um, I’m… m-maybe not as innocent as you think,” he stammered.

“I wouldn’t give a damn either way, my darling.”

With that Eddie planted a tender kiss on the back of Steve’s hand, and Steve finally squealed with pure happiness. If Chrissy hadn’t been there, he would probably have thrown himself at Eddie and begged to be mated, there and then.

Instead, he tumbled forward into a relatively chaste hug, while Chrissy looked on, giggling and clenching her fists in excitement.

When she finally scooted off, Steve snuggled up in Eddie’s lap. He buried his face in the crook of Eddie’s neck, finally breathing deeply of Eddie’s scent without pain. Steve was so calm now, so relaxed—unbelievably so, given how revved he’d been earlier. It was like a dream, one he still hardly believed was real.  The heat rolling from Eddie seemed to set any dampness remaining on his clothes and skin sizzling.  He rocked Steve and soothed him, and then, too soon, he husked in Steve’s ear:

“I’m gonna call two Ubers, Baby. One to take me home for a cold shower, and another one for you. I’ll hit you up with ideas for our first date. Sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.”  Short of clinging to Eddie’s lap like a kitty with its claws in. Eddie passed Steve his phone, and Steve fumbled his number in. “I’m uh, off tomorrow… afternoon… evening… literally whenever.”

Steve would blow off any shift to be courted by Eddie. They shared a dopey grin, till Eddie’s melted into a slight grimace. He reached behind himself and plucked Steve’s kitty ears from between the cushions. “I wondered what that was digging into my butt.”

He slid them back onto Steve’s hair then rose, stooping to kiss the tip of Steve’s nose before he left. Steve waited till the door closed softly to kick his bare feet madly and press his knuckles to his lips to smother his most excited squeal yet.

On the journey home, the driver bitched that Steve was stinking out his vehicle. Then stopped bitching abruptly, and thanked Steve for the generous tip, which must’ve come through from Eddie’s Uber account.

Steve fizzed with excitement even at that. Maybe Eddie’s driver had complained too! It was out of this world! How could anybody provoke such a strong reaction in him? He’d not even skipped any blockers! The whisper from the depths of his soul excited and scared him in equal measures.

It’s because he’s your soulmate… Woah, Harrington, seriously? Even if he deigned to mate you, it’s not like he can marry you…

Steve was too excited to listen to the demons. Before he’d got home, Eddie texted suggesting a meal at his place the following night. His uncle would be there, and he suggested Steve brought a ‘friend/chaperone.’

He burst through his front door and instantly called Robin. He told her everything in a garbled rush.

Including exactly who Eddie was.

When he finally shut up, her silence deafened. “Robin? Did I bore you to death or have you ODd over there?”

“Don’t move!” she screamed, setting him yelping. “I’m coming over. Now. Don’t… just DON’T!”

“Don’t what, Robin? I—"

She hung up. Ooookay. That was weird. What was he not supposed to do? He was reluctant to shower, but he fitted in a quick one, because she’d given him the jitters. He was towel drying his hair, when she let herself in. She rushed over, braced his shoulders and shook him.

“Steve! Do you know anything about Eddie Munson? Anything at all?”

“I know he’s a rockstar. Carol mentioned something about him being a ‘bad-boy’ but that’s part of the gig. Um, Robin… you’re hurting me.”

“Shit, sorry.” She lessened her bruising grip, steering Steve over and sitting him down on his bed. “Steve, you need to listen. Eddie Munson is more than a ‘bad-boy.’ He’s in and out of rehab like a yoyo. His last stint was, like, a month ago. They managed to keep it relatively hush-hush, but it’s an open secret if you look on social media. Even if he’s no longer off-his-head on cocaine, or whatever nasty shit, he apparently drinks like a fish and—”

“Sssstop it!” Steve hissed, shaking himself free from her lingering clutch. “He drinks coffee, Robin.”

“So do we all! Especially after a night out boozing! Seriously, Steve?” Spotting the angry tears in his eyes, she softened her tone and sat down beside him: “Listen, Eddie Munson gets through sexual partners like you get through double espressos. Rumour has it that his latest rehab stint was for sex addiction.”

He let that little bombshell percolate through him.

She squeezed his knee. “I’m not sure you should go tomorrow.”

“Oh, I’m going!” He slammed her with a glare, lip hitching slightly. Truth was, he heard her. He didn’t care: “I want you to come with me tomorrow. Listen, he’s renting a place in the swishest part of the Alpha quarter. I know how you mainline all those ‘Ultra-Alpha my Pad’ property shows—that’s your addiction, huh?”

She crinkled her nose. “You’re really dead set on this? Ugh, I suppose at least you’re not lying to me this time!”

“I’m sorry about that. All I know is how he makes me feel. Tonight, I practically threw myself at him! I was out of control. He could’ve done what he pleased with me, taken whatever he wanted. Instead, he asked if he could court me. Why should I believe all that crap about him, when he’s been nothing other than a perfect gentleman?”

“Uuuuuugh!” She pulled him into a hug, which set his heart glowing. His mind raced ahead to some dream future where Eddie and Robin were besties, the stars aligned, and the whole world was as one.

A world where when Eddie whispered the word ‘home,’ it referred to a nest.

Steve’s nest. Their nest.

The anxious grit in her tone threw him, ever-so-slightly: “Just this once, Dingus. I don’t care if he’s a rockstar Alpha or Prince fucking Charming. If he hurts you in any way, if he makes you sick… I’m literally gonna rip his throat out.”

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Chapter 5.1 on tumblr💚 If you enjoyed, every little like and reblog or comment means a lot to me so thank you💚

Chapter 5 on AO3

I am always happy to tag, pls let me know, or you can follow the tag #steddie omega cat cafe 💚

tags 💚🐈‍⬛💚 @disrespectedgoatman 💚 @bumblebeecuttlefishes

@katethetank 💚 @themoonagainstmers 💚 @chaotic-waffle 💚

💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚

[salemrph]

Yapping about the new chapter (1)

I need to scream so fucking badly. If your haven't played the main story yet. Come back later. Spoiler alert about DEATH AND REBIRTH: All from Deepspace

So okay okay!!! I need to breathe, it happened. I will talk about this special moment here. I haven't finished everything yet. But I'm already gasping and needed to put down the iPad, because holy crap.

DEATH AND REBIRTH: All from Deepspace - 04 Dust of Memories

It was delicious to go back to the Gaia Resource Center. The action, the intrigue. This moment triggered her own power and memories..

We know that Sylus has been in the N109Zone for a while. But this confirms that he came even before the Catastrophe.

How did Sylus feel when he saw her, this other half trapped in that thing?

Sylus guided her out of the falling apart Center, not wondering that she survived, until now I thought it was luck, that Xavier found her and helped her get back to Josephine but... WOW like wow

Aaaaand.... The way my jaw dropped reading this... Gosh!!! Thanks you infold!

I love this moment, she is now very aware of her own dangerous situation. We know our fearless dragon won't step back, no, he's down for this. Not only in their past lives together, he will always be by our side. It doesn't matter which faith is coming up.

I mean, through the banner, we know how deeply in love he is with MC, and seeing that sparkle in the main story made my heart jump off euphoria. ❤️

And I haven't even finished the whole chapter. Holy crap, this is amazing. All our theories are coming real.

One more thing about: when i read this, I was instantly thing about "Let the world burn", my story is more dramatic, of course, it was the finally part. But reading in the main story that Sylus just flew over the N109 Zone... I was excited to have somehow guessed that this could happen.

> Parte 2: Yapping over the Chapter

> Parte 3: Yapping over the Chapter

[whumpsaidohno]

Ok, time to meet ya

I’m Erx, owner of this “blog”. I’ve been on Tumblr for years, but it’s my first time now being on the other side, the one making posts. Not gonna lie, it’s scaring me lol. But I’m here to enjoy and (hoping so) be part of the whump community.

Here some infos about me:

- I’m Italian :) (that’s why my English’s not so good, 50/50)

- I’ve been following this community for 2, almost 3 years.

- you see the drawing mess below (actually raw, gore, cruel???), ok? It’s totally random, it’s actually my first drawing of this genre. I’m not an artist, even tho I love art and everything related to it. But I hope to improve my art, my skills, and someday post more.

- I try to write, I have so many wip that I cannot wait to read :] im not really good at writing, but I try my best. Oh, probably I’ll post in both languages (Italian and English)

- I love everything about nature, animals, music, art, graphic design, poetry, literature, writing, reading (books and ao3 mostly), f1, skz, traveling, spending quality time with family and friends aaaaand so much more… oh, can’t forget my precious Simba (my european shorthair cat) T-T

- I’m gonna write (later) what you’ll find in my blog ;)

Feel free to ask questions :) you’re safe here 🤍

TW: gore, blood, scars (please be careful if you’re not comfortable with these things)

My fav? The eyes and the back of whumpee….

[wicked-twin-twister]

Twewy textposts 9. feat. Twewy spoilers.

The One Where Neku Dies A Lot. Or he dies as much as he does in canon. Good thing he's friends with a death god. - Witt.

link to masterpost

The wonderful sprites of Neku without his headphones were made by @xxafirexx, used with permission. You can also see more of their artwork and sprite-edits on their deviantart, https://www.deviantart.com/xxangiexxrpi.

The delightful RG Shiki sprites were made by bluerainbowart, used with permission. Here’s a link to their tumblr, where you can see the sprites and their other art: https://www.tumblr.com/bluerainbowart/179486515353/aaaaand-heres-part-2-of-the-sprite-edits-use?source=share

[badkitty3000]

You Can't Go Home Again

Chapters 1 and 2

Link to Chapters 3 and Four

All Five wants to do is rest. But when yet another apocalypse threatens to doom them all, he doesn't have that luxury. This time, the only solution for the Hargreeves to try and save the world is to unite Five with another, alternate version of himself.

Five starts to spiral when he is faced with the alternate life that he could have had, if only he hadn't gone and ruined everything. But maybe, just maybe, there's still time for him to obtain the happy ending he deserves.

An alternate season three rewrite for a request I received.

Warnings: None

More chapters will be posted as I continue writing this multi-chapter fic. Enjoy!

Chapter One: The Other You

So much for being their ringer, Five thought bitterly as he stewed about the day’s earlier events. Lying there in his shitty bottom bunk bed like he was actually 13 years old, and waiting for Klaus to get back with his scotch, he tried to think of what to do next. Everyone was waiting on him, like he knew the answer to everything. It was damned if you do, damned if you don’t with this family, because no matter what Five said someone wasn’t happy with him. He sighed and flopped a pillow over his face, trying to drown out Diego and Luther’s arguing. At this point, he wished that Cobra Girl, or whatever the fuck her name was, would make him hallucinate he was on a tropical island with a fruity drink in one hand and Dolores in his other.

God damn it, he was tired.

Maybe this was for the best, though. Maybe they could just live here and be normal for once. After all, it didn’t seem all that bad. They just needed to avoid Dad’s merry band of Mega Assholes, but that should be easy enough. They could even keep the briefcase. He didn’t really need the reminder of that part of his life, anyway. The more he thought about it, the better it sounded. This was just what they all needed to start over.

Wait, where are all the lobsters? Fuck.

************************************************************************

“I swear there was a great vintage clothing store around here somewhere,” Klaus muttered to himself as he walked down the busy street, a few blocks from the hotel. He stopped and looked around, shading his eyes from the sun. He let out a frustrated groan. “The one time I could actually benefit from Ben being up my ass all the time. That jerk was like freaking Magellan.” He chuckled. “No wonder I’ve always been bad at directions. I usually just followed him.” Klaus caught the side-eye of a woman hurrying past him. “Aaaaand…now I’m talking to myself. Wonderful.”

As he stepped off the curb to try the other side of the street, he stopped dead in his tracks. Coming out of the café across the road, was an absolute dead ringer for Five. Well, an older version of him. But not like his real, 60 year-old version. More like the correct version, if the correct version had been allowed to age normally with the rest of his siblings.

It had to be him. Same dark hair swept to the side. Same lean build and sharp facial features. Same aggravated look on his face.

The one thing that was clearly wrong, besides the fact that he was roughly 30, was that he had two small children in tow, with one of them holding his hand. Then Klaus almost passed out when he saw a very pretty woman follow him out, putting her arm around his waist and kissing his cheek.

And Five just… smiled at her. Like it was the most normal thing in the world.

“What the…” Klaus started to wonder, before almost being run over by a delivery truck that came zooming down the street. “Shit!”

He stepped back onto the curb just in time, as the driver honked his horn and yelled obscenities at him as he drove past. But Klaus barely registered all of that. He couldn’t stop staring at his brother’s doppelganger, trying to figure out what to do about it. Would he even know Klaus? This was probably a completely different version that grew up here, in the Sparrow’s timeline and would have no idea that the Umbrella Academy even existed.

“Five!” Klaus yelled out, not even thinking.

The older version of his brother stopped and turned, looking for who might have called him.

“Fuck, it really is him,” Klaus muttered. “Five! Over here!” He waved his arms in the air, catching Five’s attention.

He watched as Five squinted across the street, then looked at the woman next to him, shrugging. The small girl holding his hand gave a sharp tug to get his attention, and Five let her pull him along down the sidewalk, taking one last confused look at Klaus over his shoulder.

“Fuck…now what?” Klaus said, one hand on his hip. “What would Ben say? He’d tell me I should not follow him and just go back to the hotel and tell Five. So…yeah, I’m going to follow him.”

Klaus stayed on the opposite side of the street, and hung back a little, but he followed Five and his family for a few blocks. As he paused behind a telephone pole, trying to hide for a few seconds to widen the gap between them, he was engulfed in a flash of blue light before being thrown against the side of a building, the front of his shirt clutched in someone’s hands, and a snarling voice speaking to him.

“Who are you and why are you following me?”

Klaus looked into the familiar green eyes of his brother, whose other version he had just recently been reunited with. There was no doubt it was Five now. Even without the spatial jump and the physical assault. When Klaus’s eyes dropped down to the fist that was clenching his shirt, he saw the tattoo that matched his own.

“Holy shit! Five, it’s really you!”

“How the fuck do you know my name? Who are you?” Five demanded again, pushing Klaus further into the brick wall.

“It’s me…Klaus! You know, your brother?”

Five paused, but didn’t loosen his grip at all. “What are you talking about?”

Klaus held his hands up in surrender, while also showing Five the inside of his left wrist. “See? It’s me! Numero Quatro. Remember?”

Five took a small step back, his eyes wide, but he still held tight. “Klaus?”

Klaus laughed. “Yeah! Hey buddy, how the hell are you?”

After a few more seconds of staring blankly at his brother, Five let him go and Klaus smoothed his shirt down. “I don’t understand. How are you here? This isn’t your timeline.”

“I know!” Klaus giggled. “It’s a LONG fucking story, one which my brother…well, you, actually, can explain much better than I can. But after a couple failed time travel attempts, here we are! And Dad was NOT thrilled to see us, let me tell you. Do you know he has a whole ass other family now? And Ben! He’s alive…or a version of him is alive. He seems like a real dick. But then there’s you, and look at you! All grown up and with a family? That’s so great! But how did you get here? How are you not a Sparrow?”

Five pinched his nose between his thumb and forefinger and sighed before smiling at his long-lost brother. “Klaus, it is really good to see you, but please, give me a minute here. I need to think.”

“Right. Sorry.”

“So, how did you time travel here? With what resource?”

“To this particular timeline? A magical briefcase. Before that, it was just you.”

“Ignoring whatever the hell a magical briefcase is, do you mean you used my powers to time travel?”

“Yes, but with varying success.”

“Ok. So, there’s a version of me with you now?”

Klaus nodded. “Yes. And you are ADORABLE.” He saw Five’s frown of confusion. “You’re thirteen. Well, not really. You’re actually 58, since you got stuck in an apocalypse for 45 years and then messed up your own time math on your return to 2019. So, yeah, you’re super cute but, wow, are you ornery.”

Five thought for a moment before quietly mumbling, “So you must be from an alternate Umbrella Academy timeline where I still time traveled at thirteen, but with a different outcome.”

Klaus nodded. “Sure, that sounds about right.” Then he tilted his head in confusion. “Hang on, if you’re here and the same age as me, and you still have the Umbrella tattoo, then how did you get here and how are there two of you?”

Five frowned. “Again, I’m going to speculate, because I can’t be entirely sure. But from what you’re saying, it sounds like there were at least two original timelines where the Umbrella Academy and us and the rest of our siblings existed. I decided to defy Reggie and jump to the future in both of those timelines, except that’s where things went differently. It sounds like in your timeline, that version of me got stuck in the future with no way back. In my particular case, I jumped and instead of going forward in time, I went sideways and got stuck.”

“Sideways?”

“Meaning, I jumped to a different, alternate universe with the Sparrows, but the time remained the same. So, I grew up here, in this timeline but without good old Dad to raise me.”

“Oh right…” Klaus said, nodding as if he completely understood. “So, you’re not the same Five that rubbed hot chili oil in my underwear in retaliation for stealing your sandwich when we were twelve?”

Five looked taken aback, but then he gave a short laugh. “No, but I did dare MY Klaus to touch his junk after cutting up a habanero pepper, then proceeded to take his picture when he started screaming and pouring milk down his underpants.”

“Man, you really are an asshole in every timeline!” Klaus laughed. “Poor me.”

With a grin, Five shook his head. “It really is good to see you, Klaus. The last time I saw any of my siblings I was thirteen. I’m glad to see you made it out and are doing well.”

“Well…I wouldn’t go that far, but I made it out anyway. And what about you? So, you landed here and then what? I didn’t see you with the other assholes who were beating the shit out of us in our own home.”

“Oh, the Sparrows? Yeah, they are a special brand of dickheads, that’s for sure. Even as teenagers, they sucked. Which is why—”

Just then, a pulsing wave of…something…washed over them and the entire city block, only for it to reverse itself and disappear the way it came. As Klaus and Five stood there in shock, a lady that had been walking on the other side of the street screamed loudly. When they looked over, they saw her holding up a dog leash attached to an empty collar. She pivoted in place, scanning all around her while she called out “Winston!” in a panic.

“Well, that’s probably not good,” Klaus observed; head tilted to the side.

“Yeah, no shit,” Five snapped. He glanced down the street, where his family was waiting for him on a bench. They appeared to be intact and he let out a sigh of relief. “Listen, I have to get back to my family. I don’t know what the hell that was, but if I had to bet, I’d say it had something to do with Reginald. So, as much as I’d love to sit here and catch up, I have to go.”

“Oh,” Klaus said sadly. “Yeah, ok. But don’t you want to come meet the rest of the gang? We’re all staying over the Hotel Obsidian, if you know where that is –”

“You’re staying there?” Five asked incredulously.

“Yeah, why?”

“That’s Dad’s place. He owns it. Didn’t you know that?”

Klaus shook his head. “No, I had no idea. Are you sure?”

Five rolled his eyes. “Yes, I’m sure. I’ve been tracking Reggie since I was a kid. That place is basically his evil lair, and even if I haven’t been able to figure out what is going on in there, it’s a safe bet it’s in nobody’s best interest except his own.”

“Sounds about right, actually,” Klaus mused. “But, hey! He’s not there now, and our siblings would love to meet you, I’m sure. And OUR Five…he’s such a little shit gremlin, you should see him…you…well, you know what I mean. Don’t you want to meet your other self?”

“I’m sure there are terrible consequences to that, actually.”

“Oh, come on…just for a minute…”

“Klaus! A mysterious, dog-eating, energy wave from hell just passed over the city and you want to start planning a family reunion? They aren’t even my real family, anyway! So…while this has been fun, I have to go. Good luck with everything.”

In another flash of blue, Five was gone; reappearing at the other end of the street where his wife and kids were still waiting. Klaus watched in fascination as Five hugged them, and then continued down the street in a hurry, keeping them close to him for protection.

“Well, this is some weird-ass shit, even for us, right Benerino?” Klaus closed his eyes and sighed when he realized he was alone again. “Damn it. I keep forgetting.”

************************************************************************

Five was helping himself to the large selection of booze the hotel bar had to offer, trying to find just the right single malt to drown his sorrows and help him forget the happenings of the day. He decided that things couldn’t really get worse, so he might as well get plastered. He rattled off the earlier events in his head as he tipped back a bottle of Japanese whiskey and swallowed down a large gulp.

Lila tried to kill me. BOTH fucking briefcases won’t work. Lila tried to kill me AGAIN. The Commission is dead and the world is soon to follow. My old, one-armed ass died in front of me without giving me one single piece of useful information except “don’t save the world.” Jesus, what an asshole. And now this kugelblitz shit. He took another swig, grimacing as it slipped down his throat and burned his stomach. Oh yeah, let’s not forget that I’m still stuck in this prepubescent body, which is all sorts of fun. Although I think I spied one single hair on my nuts this morning, so things are really starting to look up.

“Fuck,” he muttered before laughing sardonically at himself and taking another pull at the bottle. “I should have listened to you, Dolores. I should have waited until I was one-hundred-percent sure of the math, just like you said. But you know me, always impulsive. I’m glad you’re not here to witness this, my dear, because I really stepped in it this time.”

“Five! Holy shit, I’ve been looking everywhere for you!

Klaus came running up to the bar, out of breath and smiling. Five frowned before taking another sip of whiskey. “Well, I’m not sure where you’ve been looking because I’ve been right here for the last hour.”

“Well, yeah…I mean I just got here. But, still, I have big news!”

“I’m on the edge of my seat,” Five said dryly.

“I met you!”

“Excuse me?”

“You! Well, another you, but it was still you! But like, older, you know? But with the same Umbrella Academy tattoo and surly attitude. And let me tell you…I was right because you did grow up to be hot. So, never fear little bro, you are one smoking piece of ass once you get past this awkward phase.”

“Klaus,” Five said, running a tired hand down his face. “What in the fuck are you talking about?”

Klaus took a deep breath. “I was walking around, trying to find this store I used to like, when I saw you. Another version of you.”

Five set the whiskey bottle down with a hard “thunk.” He crossed his arms on the bar top and leaned in toward Klaus, his eyebrows drawing together. “Come again?”

“You, Fivey!” Klaus repeated, gesturing wildly to his confused, smaller brother. “And get this…you have a family! An adorable wife and two precious little children. You should have seen yourself in absolute domestic bliss.” Klaus put a hand to his chest. “Oh, it was precious.”

Five slow blinked a few times, trying to understand what his moronic brother was babbling about. The whiskey was slowing his processing speed and he needed to catch up. “Hang on,” he squinted, trying to keep things in focus. “You saw another version of me? And you talked to him?”

Klaus nodded. “Yes!”

“This is…” Five muttered, picking up the bottle, but then setting it back down again with a frown. “This is not good.”

“That’s what he said! Well, not those exact words, but pretty close. I tried to get him to come here and meet everyone but—”

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Five barked.

“What? I thought he’d like to see the other versions of us, since he comes from a different timeline, apparently. This you didn’t get stuck in an apocalypse, he just landed here instead. I don’t really understand everything and we didn’t have time to get into specifics before the scary energy tsunami killed the vibe.”

“Energy…what? Damn it, Klaus, I’m too drunk for this.” Five sighed heavily, dropping his head onto his arms before raising it again. He passed a hand through his hair, sweeping it out of his eyes. “Ok, listen carefully. Do NOT, under any circumstances, interact with my other self again. Understand?”

Klaus pouted. “Why? Aren’t you curious about this you?”

With a sorrowful look in his eyes, he shook his head slowly. “It doesn’t matter if I am or not. What matters is keeping us safe. You and our siblings. We can’t worry about anyone else right now, and that includes any other versions of ourselves that may be walking around. We just don’t have that luxury.”

“But…your kids…”

“They are not MY kids, Klaus! They’re HIS!” Five snapped, much more harshly than he had intended. He backed down a little. “I’m sorry. There’s too much at stake. Not to mention I can’t be trusted if I’m around another version of myself.”

“Oh, right…the psychosis thing. Yeah, Luther mentioned you went a little..” Klaus made a cuckoo bird noise and circled a finger next to his head. “I forgot about that.”

“Yeah, well I haven’t. It’s not exactly a great feeling to want to scratch your ball sack off while your doppelganger tries to murder you. You tend not to forget those things.”

“Point taken, mon frere.” Klaus grabbed a shot glass from behind the bar and poured himself some of Five’s whiskey. After throwing it back in one go, he looked around. “Alright, I have to go find everyone else and tell them the news. They aren’t going to believe this.”

As Klaus walked away, Five knew he should stop him. He needed to tell him about the kugelblitz, especially since it sounded like maybe he had already experienced a wave of it. But he had just been thrown some very heavy news and he needed time to think. It didn’t help that his brain was foggy with booze and he had already been in a maudlin mood even before Klaus had dumped this on him.

There was another version of himself walking around that city right now, not that far away. Another version that grew up in a normal world. That didn’t spend decades in a lifeless hellscape, scrounging to stay alive and slowly going insane. One that hadn’t fucked up his life, not once, but twice, with shaky math and a too-cocky attitude. And one that had a real family.

That was what Five kept circling back to. Klaus had seen him with a wife and two kids. Just the thought that there was an alternative life for him out there that included a real family nearly sucked the air right out of his lungs. A wife. A real wife that he presumably loved and that loved him in return. Children of his own.

It was too much. He couldn’t breathe and he furiously pulled at his necktie as if it were a noose tightening around his thin neck. Five pulled in loud gasps of air, but it still wasn’t enough. Grabbing the half-empty bottle of whiskey off the bar, he staggered towards the first bathroom he saw off the main floor. Panting with eyes wide, Five trudged to the old, grimy sink and stared into the mirror.

“Fuck you,” Five hissed to the skinny little shithead that was staring back at him. “You’re useless.”

He took a long swig from the bottle, his hand shaking on the way. As two small rivers of brown liquid seeped out of the corners of his mouth and down his chin, he lowered the bottle clumsily, hitting the side of the sink and smashing it into pieces. As shards of glass rained down onto the tiled floor, the pleasant tinkling sound echoing around him, Five laughed. It was a dangerous, demonic laugh that frightened even himself. He stopped abruptly, his hands clutching the sides of the sink, palms digging into the slivers of glass that had fallen there.

“You stupid asshole,” he snarled at the kid-version of himself. “You absolute piece of shit. Look what you’ve done. You’ve ruined everything.” He looked down sadly, then back up again. This time, instead of hate in his eyes there was only bottomless sorrow. “You don’t deserve that life. That’s why you ended up here, looking like this. Because you are the version that shouldn’t exist. You are the version that does not get happiness.”

Five’s cold eyes flitted down to the ground. There, lying next to his polished dress shoes that he had been so excited to complement his tailored suit, was a large piece of the broken bottle. The shard was long and tapered at the end to form a jagged dagger shape. Perfect for stabbing. Or slicing into a main artery so that someone, or yourself, would bleed out in a matter of seconds. Five stared at that piece of glass for far too long before slowly lifting his head again, facing himself in the mirror.

“I know. Don’t worry, Dolores…it was just a thought. Besides, that would be like drinking bleach while your car is flying off a cliff into a ravine. Why bother? Either way it ends the same.”

A few hours later, after cleaning the bathroom of any evidence, and composing himself back into a man in full control, Five found his siblings. It was clear that Klaus had filled them in on his discovery, and they all hushed as Five neared the group, although he noticed Klaus himself was missing. Pausing to grab himself a tumbler of scotch on the way, Five joined them. After stopping to take a casual drink, one hand in the pocket of his suit pants, Five gestured with his glass in hand.

“Alright, let’s hear it. I know Klaus told you, so let’s get this over with.”

“Five, you have a family! That’s wonderful!” Luther gushed.

“I guess I was wrong, maybe you do have a bit of domesticity in you,” Lila snorted.

Viktor shrugged with a smile and Allison rolled her eyes, neither of them saying a word.

Diego nonchalantly flipped a knife in his hand while eyeing Five up. “So now what? We have to deal with two of you? Because I can barely stand one of you.”

Five smiled his usual, acerbic smile. “Well, Diego, the feeling is mutual. But fear not; neither you nor I will be coming anywhere near my other self.”

“Why not? Klaus said the other you seemed perfectly nice after you stopped slamming him against a wall,” Luther said innocently.

Five sighed heavily, wishing for the umpteenth time that he didn’t have the sole responsibility of critical thinking skills in this family. “Because…” he began slowly, to make sure they were understanding, “Not only does it have the possibility of creating even more havoc to this timeline, there’s also the little matter of –”

“Oh!” Luther interrupted animatedly. “I remember! The paradox psychosis!” He turned to the rest of the family. “You guys missed it, but he kind of went a little…” He lowered his voice to a whisper even though Five could hear everything. “…psycho, if you know what I mean.”

“Jesus, Luther, I’m right here!” Five closed his eyes to try and regroup. “But, yes, paradox psychosis is the real deal. And there’s no way around that. So, let’s just focus on the task at hand, which is trying to get out of here before the world implodes with us in it.”

Five’s gaze landed on Lila, and he immediately knew she was up to something. “What the hell are you smirking at?”

She shrugged while sticking her hand up her short skirt and pulling out a small item. Five made a disgusted groaning noise. “God, please, whatever that is, I do not want it.”

“Oh, shut up, you little perv. Here,” she said with an eye roll, shoving the item into Five’s hand and forcing him to take it. “While you were having your little heart to heart with your freshly deceased corpse back at the Commission, I found this.”

Five peered down at his open hand. It was a syringe filled with a yellowish substance. On closer inspection, he could make out two words scrawled along the side, in what looked like his own handwriting. Paradox Juice.

“Paradox Juice?” he questioned out loud. He looked back up at Lila. “Is this what I think it is?”

She shrugged again. “Your guess is as good as mine. I assumed it was some sort of concoction to ward off psychosis should you ever have to meet with your doppelganger. The old, decrepit you probably made it during his time at the Commission.”

Five held the syringe up to the light and peered intently at the golden liquid inside. “Where did you find this?”

“On one of the tables in the bunker. When you so rudely had me leave during your existential crisis, I swiped them on the way out.”

“Them?”

“Oh yeah…” she reached up into her skirt again, revealing an identical syringe. “There were two.”

“How did you…where did you have those, because we just…I mean I’m pretty sure I would have found those when we were upstairs doing…what the hell?” Diego stammered; his dark eyes clouded with confusion.

“Don’t worry about it, honey,” Lila answered with a smile and a quick pat on his cheek. “Every girl has her secrets.”

“Well, regardless of this finding, there is no reason for me to make contact with my other self. I don’t see the benefit, and it could possibly do more harm, like speed the kugelblitz along,” Five explained while shoving both syringes into his inside suit coat pocket. He took another drink from his glass. “Let’s just forget it, ok?”

“Guys!” Klaus yelled as he rushed up to the group. “I have some bad news.”

***************************************************

Chapter Two: Homicidal Rage

As the seven of them trudged along the city streets, taking up the width of the sidewalk, and bumping into one another while grumbling and shoving each other in return, the sky began to darken. Another pulsing kugel wave washed over them and the surrounding buildings. They all watched in horror as every other living creature evaporated into ashes and blew away with the wind. In a matter of seconds, they were the only ones around.

“Fuck, this is not good,” Five groaned. “I really don’t see how finding my other self is going to help anything. Besides, for all we know, that wave right there just destroyed me.”

“We don’t know, but we have to try,” Viktor said. “Between the two of you, maybe you can figure out how to get the briefcase working again.”

Five looked dubiously down at the mangled black case in his hand. “I just don’t think my other self is going to welcome us into his home with open arms. I know I wouldn’t.”

“I’m telling you, Fivey, this you seemed much less ragey,” Klaus said. Five glared up at him. “See? That look right there, the one that means you want to rip my throat out? I didn’t get that from this other you.”

“Probably because that version is getting laid on a regular basis,” Diego murmured to Lila.

Ignoring his brothers, Five went back to his own thoughts as they continued down the street. When Klaus had told them Chet was kicking them out of the hotel due to “insufficient funds”, there was a moment of panic. They had no money and their only home was currently occupied by the world’s biggest assholes. Five glanced up at a giant billboard looming overhead featuring those same assholes, before looking back down at the ground. Fucking fuckers.

After a family meeting that involved more bickering and finger pointing, they had concluded that the only possibility, no matter how slim, of stopping the kugelblitz by returning to their correct timeline, was to track down the other Five and ask him for help.  Five had been the last hold-out in agreeing to the plan. He had no desire to find out what this other version was like. The one with the home and a wife and kids. Because he already knew the answer. He had everything and Five had nothing.

Allison, who had been leading the group, suddenly stopped, causing everyone behind her to cartoonishly crash into one another. She shoved Diego away from her with an irritated scowl, while continuing to look down at the piece of paper in her hand. She lifted her eyes to the building in front of them. It was a beautiful brownstone with magazine-worthy flowers and plants covering the front stoop; the gorgeous geraniums and petunias overflowing from their tasteful terracotta pots.

“I think this is it,” she noted.

“Damn, Five…nice digs. You must be doing well for yourself,” Diego commented after giving Allison a shove in return.

“Why do you assume Five is the breadwinner here? Maybe it’s his wife,” Viktor argued.

“I don’t. But Five is all smart and shit, I assume he’s probably some hot shot scientist or something.”

“Maybe his wife is a hot shot scientist,” Viktor shot back.

As the conversation quickly devolved into an argument among the entire group, Five remained silent. He peered up at the house in question. The one where the supposedly more successful version of himself resided. He stared at the flowers and the set of brick stairs that led to the front door with the cheerful looking wreath. He thought back on a time during the apocalypse when he and Dolores were scavenging for supplies. They had come across a destroyed row of brownstones just like this one, and he remembered finding broken shards of terracotta intermixed with the crumbling bricks. The odds that it had been this exact same house were pretty slim, but not impossible. Talk about fucking irony.

Five wiped the sweat from his brow and absent-mindedly scratched at his shoulder. Luther noticed and pointed his big meaty finger at Five.

“Dude! I saw that. You just scratched yourself.”

“Yeah, and you’re starting to sweat again,” Lila added, wrinkling her nose.

“I just walked several miles in a three-piece suit, of course I’m sweating. And people itch, Luther. Stop being dumb.”

“Denial,” Luther said, crossing his arms over his chest and nodding wisely. “Stage one.”

“God damn it! I am not…” Five started before scratching at his ass cheek, “…In denial, ok?”

“You do look a little weird,” Diego said, leaning in closer to Five in curiosity.

Five stuck his hand out, pushing his brother away with a palm to his face. “I do not look weird. Fuck, I need to take a piss.”

There were multiple grumblings around him, and Five was starting to suspect that maybe they had a point. He didn’t feel great. But…

“Hang on,” he said, glancing around and above him, looking crazier by the second. “This could be a trap.”

“How could it be a trap? He doesn’t even know we’re coming,” Allison reasoned.

Five whipped his head in her direction, eyes wide and manic. She took a small step backwards. “Because, dear sister…I am a fucking genius, remember?” He tapped his temple with his finger. “And I would anticipate our arrival. Probably set up some trip wires or something,” he mumbled, looking frantically around him.

“Ok, this is not going to get any better,” Luther told everyone.

Klaus nodded. “Yeah, Five, I think you need to take that shot of paradox juice.”

Remembering he had the two syringes in his jacket, Five took them out and held them up for everyone to see. “I’m not taking this, are you crazy? HE probably made these and poisoned them just to try and get rid of me,” he raged, pointing up at the house. “Paradox juice? You expect me to believe that I would come up with that lame ass name?” He turned to yell up at the windows facing the street. “I’m on to you, asshole!”

“Oh, for fucks sake,” Lila groaned. Mimicking Five’s powers, she blinked over to him, catching him off guard as she grabbed the syringes out of his hands. As Five began to protest, she looked over at Luther. “Hold him still, big guy.”

No stranger to taking orders, Luther immediately complied. Holding Five in place by pinning his arms to his side, he tried to reason with his struggling, smaller brother that it was for his own good. But that was like trying to reason with a cocaine-fueled raccoon, and Five snarled and hissed while trying to get away.

“Get your giant ape hands off of me! You tried to kill me before, I know you’ll do it again! LET ME G—OW! SON OF A BITCH!”

Lila sunk the needle of the syringe directly into the side of Five’s neck, pushing the plunger down and smiling gleefully while he writhed in pain.

“FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK…” Five screamed as Luther continued to keep him trapped.

“How long do you think it takes to work?” Viktor asked worriedly.

Lila shook her head. “No idea. Might not even work at all. Or I just killed him. But, you win some, you lose some, am I right?”

Everyone watched in fascination as Five slowly started to relax in Luther’s grip. His jaw unclenched and he stopped swearing. After about two minutes, the crazed look in his eyes left and he gazed at the concerned faces around him like a man waking from a dream.

“I think…I think I’m ok now,” he said weakly.

Luther leaned down, studying his face up close. “Are you sure? Because if I let you go and you kick me in the balls again, I am not going to be happy.”

Five shook his head. “No, really. I think that shit actually worked.”

Luther looked around for confirmation, and receiving nods of approval from everyone else, he let go of Five’s arms. Stepping back, he shielded his crotch from any unexpected backlash.

Five took in a deep breath of air and wiped away the last few drops of sweat that had been trickling down the back of his neck. Then he ran a shaky hand through his hair before straightening his suit coat and tie with as much dignity as he could manage.

“Sorry about that,” he told everyone, trying to regain his composure again. “If I said anything rude, I apologize. I was clearly not in my right mind.”

“So, no different than any other day,” Diego muttered under his breath.

Five shot him an irritated look, but said nothing. He turned to Lila. “Even though it was entirely unnecessary to stab me directly in the neck, you lunatic, thank you.”

“Happy to do it,” Lila grinned, slapping him hard on the back.

“Alright, then,” Five stated, rolling his shoulders back. “Let’s do this.”

As he took one step forward, the front door of the house swung wide open, revealing an older, and very sweaty and harried looking, version of himself. In his other self’s hands was a rifle that was trained directly at Five’s head.

“Don’t fucking move,” the other Five warned through gritted teeth.

Five paused, taking in the clearly psychotic version of himself before quipping. “Hey, asshole…the safety’s still on.”

As the alternate version lowered the weapon to check the safety, Five and Lila exchanged knowing glances with one another, before simultaneously blinking onto the porch. Appearing directly in front of himself, Five grabbed the rifle out of his doppelganger’s hands, while at the same time Lila stabbed the needle of the second syringe into his neck.

“AH! MOTHERFUCKER!” the other Five screamed, falling to his knees as he slapped a hand over the pinprick of blood that had started to seep out of the small puncture wound. “WHAT THE FUCK, YOU PSYCHO?”

Five threw the rifle down to Luther, who caught it in one hand, before turning to Lila. “Really? In the neck again? What is wrong with you?”

“I live for your pain.”

With a shake of his head, Five looked down at the panting, cursing version of himself. “Stop being a pussy. It’s not that bad.”

His alternate glared up at him. “Fuck you, Blue’s Clues.”

Lila laughed loudly. “Nice!” She held out her hand for a high five, but when she only received an icy glare from both men, she shrugged. “You’re too close to the situation, but trust me, that was hilarious.”

************************************************************************

“You have a lovely home, ma’am,” Luther said with an awkward smile as he sat scrunched on the couch between Klaus and Viktor.

The seven siblings, plus the older looking, alternate Five and his wife were gathered in the small living room. Five’s wife, who was introduced as Marie, sat perched on the arm of her husband’s chair, rubbing his back while he stared down his younger looking self.

“Thank you, Luther, that’s very kind.”

There was more awkward silence until finally Allison spoke up.

“Ok, so we obviously did not come here just for a friendly visit, although it is lovely meeting you two. However, we have a big problem. Our being in this timeline has caused a rift, so to speak, in the universe and now it’s trying to kill us.” She looked over at her smaller brother, who was standing with his hands shoved in his pockets, glowering angrily at his other self. “Five? Care to explain?”

Snapping reluctantly out of his stupor, Five faced his sister. “Right.” Then he addressed the other Five and his wife again. “So, as I’m sure you’ve noticed there are large energy waves pulsing over the city, erasing dogs and lobsters and now people.”

“Yeah, I have noticed. And I also happened to notice they started when Klaus here decided to follow me.”

Klaus started to protest, but Diego bumped him with his elbow, telling him to shut up. Five continued.

“Well, you are right about that. But it’s not Klaus’s fault, at least not solely. It’s all of ours. I thought we’d be able to remain here, just keeping a low profile, and live out our lives here. But, it seems the universe has other plans. So, we have accidentally created a kugelblitz and in a few short days it will destroy the entire universe.”

“Like a prolapsing rectum,” Lila added helpfully.

Both Fives looked at her with a frown and then turned back toward one another. The alternate Five set his elbows on his knees, leaning forward and steepling his hands under his chin. “So, you’re telling me that you group of assholes are the reason my family is going to be wiped out?”

Five nodded, actually looking a little sad. “I’m afraid so.”

“And you just came here to let me know, why? Just to give me a heads up? Mighty kind of you, thanks.”

Five gritted his teeth. “No, jacka—” He stopped mid-insult when Luther cleared his throat and gave him a look that said “Behave”. “No, that’s not why we came. We came…” He pushed a hand through his hair and he saw Marie bite back a smile as she recognized the same mannerisms as her husband. “We came to ask for help.”

“How am I supposed to help you? In case you forgot, James Bond, Jr., I AM you!” Marie gave him a pinch under his arm and the older Five jumped before looking just a tiny bit guilty. “Sorry.”

Five turned to his siblings, throwing his hands in the air. “See? I told you coming here was useless.” He turned to his doppelganger, leaning in with a caustic glare. “And just to remind you, shithead, I’m 28 years older than you, so watch your mouth.”

“Ok!” Luther jumped in, trying to salvage the conversation. “The thing is, Five,” he said, addressing the older version that was currently looking like he was considering punching his smaller self in the mouth. “We really do need your help. And you need his help. The two of you together are the only chance we have to stop this thing and get back to our correct timeline. Then you and your family, and the rest of the world, will be safe.”

“And how do you propose we do that?” the other Five said, tearing his eyes away from himself and turning to Luther. “My time travel math is just as shaky as his. I’ve been studying it my whole life, so it’s gotten better, but I still wouldn’t trust it. I certainly wouldn’t trust it with my wife and kids’ lives in question.” He placed a hand on his wife’s knee and squeezed it gently.

“Well, luckily, we won’t have to rely on just our powers,” Five explained, picking the black briefcase off the floor and holding it up for the other version to see.

“What the hell is that?”

Klaus piped up. “Remember I told you about the magical briefcase?”

The alternate Five nodded. “Yeah, I remember. So, how does it work?”

“Well, currently it doesn’t. Which is why we need you,” Five said.

The other Five took a skeptical look at the battered case. “How am I supposed to help? I’ve never seen anything like that before.”

Five sighed. “As it turns out, another version of ourselves created it, using our powers as its basic design. It’s one-hundred-percent reliable, unlike our blinks. That is, when the universe isn’t collapsing. Now, it’s a hunk of junk. That’s where you come in.”

“What makes you think I know how to fix it?”

Five’s mouth turned up at the corner with a smug smile. “Because, I know us. And I am willing to bet that you work in some sort of scientific field.” When he received no denial, he continued. “I am also willing to bet you have some sort of lab right here in your home where you’ve been working on time travel over the years, trying to perfect it.”

Marie laughed. “Wow, you are dead on with that. He’s made it his life’s work figuring out how to accurately time travel. Even when he was a teen, his mom said he was constantly in their basement working on it. She showed me pictures of him slumped over his desk, looking just like you actually, having fallen asleep while running his numbers. It was very cute.”

Five paused, thrown for a second by that comment. “His mom?”

The other Five nodded. “I was adopted after I jumped here,” he explained offhandedly. “So, what you’re telling me is that if we can get this briefcase up and running again, you can return to your rightful timeline, the universe will correct itself, and my family will be safe?”

Still dwelling on the fact that his other self had been adopted by different people, Five nodded slowly before collecting himself again. “Theoretically.”

The alt Five turned to look at his wife. “What do you think, darling?”

“Five, they’re your family, even if they aren’t from your same timeline. You told me how much you’ve missed them over the years, and now here they are! They need your help, and I know you can give it to them.” She brushed a piece of hair out of his eye with a sweet smile. “This is what you’ve been working towards. To use your powers for something good and big.” She kissed him, placing a hand on his cheek and he closed his eyes for a moment. “You can do this.”

He nodded and then turned back toward the group. “Ok, I will do what I can to help.”

“Thank you,” Allison breathed out with a sigh of relief. “Thank you, so much.”

“Better go show him your lab,” Marie told her Five. “In the meantime, you must all be starving. The kids were just next door playing, but I’ll have them come back and I’ll make dinner. Sound good?”

“I know I could eat,” Luther said excitedly while Viktor rolled his eyes at him.

“That would be lovely, Marie, thank you. Can we help?” Viktor asked.

************************************************************************

As the two Fives made their way down the basement steps, neither of them said a word. Five was still reeling from the brief bit of information he had just received about his 30 year-old self. This other Five had been adopted by someone other than Reginald. And from the sounds of it, they were nice, normal people. He swallowed down the lump in his throat, trying to clear his head and focus on what he needed to do. But it was extremely difficult when all he kept thinking about was how this alternate version of himself had been given the chance for a normal life while he just kept getting shit on over and over again. It was maddening to think about, and if he let it fester in his mind, he was going to go crazy.

Fuck, he needed a drink.

As his other self flipped the light switch on at the end of the stairs, the overhead lights flickered on with a quiet hum. Five stopped on the bottom stair and took everything in. The space wasn’t huge, but every single usable square inch was filled with something. Long work tables scattered with tools and notebooks, empty coffee cups and paper plates filled with crumbs. The walls were lined with white boards; each one crammed with lines and lines of familiar equations and scribblings. It was surreal to see his own handwriting and obvious work in a place he’d never set foot in before.

As he scanned over the jam-packed computer desk against the far wall, his eyes fell to the framed picture sitting amongst the clutter. It was the other version of himself, with Marie and his two kids. It must not have been taken that long ago, because the two adults looked the same. The kids in the picture looked to be about four and six. A girl and a boy. The four of the them were on a beach somewhere, the sun shining down and making the water behind them sparkle. The girl was perched on her dad’s shoulders, a pink sunhat on her head. The boy was standing in front of Marie, grinning widely with a plastic bucket and shovel in his hand. The other him was smiling directly at the camera, while his pretty wife looked lovingly over at him. Five had never seen himself smile like that before. He had no idea that’s what he looked like when genuinely happy. It was off-putting, to say the least.

“You ok?” the other Five asked gruffly when he realized his older yet smaller self seemed frozen to the spot.

 Five cleared his throat. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. So what is all this stuff?”

“Well, I’m sure you recognize the equations and proofs,” he said, pointing to the white boards. He gestured to the tables. “I’ve been working on developing a type of time travel system, much like that briefcase. Some sort of object that could be programmed specifically to a certain date and time, so we don’t have to rely solely on our powers. Like—”

“A watch,” Five finished for him.

The other Five nodded. “Exactly.”

“I never did understand the briefcase,” Five mused. “It’s so bulky.”

“I assume it’s bulletproof, though?”

Five scoffed. “Don’t get me started.”

“Well, anyways, have a look around. Maybe something here can help, I don’t know. I’ve never really tried it in practical application before. It’s always been theoretical.”

“That’s ok,” Five said, setting the briefcase on top of one of the tables. “We have this as a guide. We can see if the inner workings of the case make sense in comparison to your work here. Then maybe we can piece things together to create a working timepiece.”

The alternate Five nodded thoughtfully again, studying his other self. “Hang on,” he said before striding over to the desk and opening the bottom drawer. He pulled out a bottle of single malt scotch and two glass tumblers. After filling each one halfway, he handed one over to Five.

“I recognize the need for a drink,” he explained with a tiny twitch at the corner of his mouth.

Five accepted the glass, trying to disguise the fact that he was practically salivating at the sight. Needing a drink was an understatement. He wanted the whole damn bottle. But he didn’t need to be getting drunk at a time like this. And he also didn’t need to be showcasing his shortcomings to this clearly sober, well-adjusted, life-is-just-peachy-keen version of him, either. The fact that he was a raging alcoholic with unhealthy coping mechanisms didn’t seem pertinent to the current situation. Instead, he lifted the glass in a toast and took as generous of a swallow as he dared. The whiskey was smooth and it tasted so fucking good, Five had to silently tell himself to not slug the whole thing back in one gulp. He watched as the other him took a leisurely sip from his own glass. He probably goes to church every Sunday, too. Fucking Mother Theresa over here.

“So, where do you work?” Five asked, trying to change the subject.

“Over at the university.”

“Physics department?”

“Naturally.”

Five nodded. “That’s where I always figured I’d end up, too. Just…didn’t work out for me.”

“Yeah, what happened? Klaus said something about a different apocalypse?”

Five paused, staring into his glass. “Let’s just get to work, ok?”

The other version shrugged. “Sure thing.”

[elyvorg]

Kieran Part 1: It’s All About Strength

I’m a longtime Pokémon fan who happily plays through every mainline game, but I’ve never been more than mildly fond of the occasional character here and there, because Pokémon isn’t much for deep and nuanced character writing. Then I played The Teal Mask DLC and came out of it with many, many Feelings and Thoughts about Kieran – enough so that it warrants a full, juicy analysis about all of his subtleties and issues. I never expected I’d write one of these character analysis rambles of mine on a Pokémon character of all things, but here we are. Colour me surprised and impressed.

For anyone reading this in the future: this was written before The Indigo Disk came out and therefore only talks about the events of The Teal Mask. Assuming The Indigo Disk doesn’t completely drop the ball on the best character-writing job that mainline Pokémon has ever done (please; please don’t), there will probably be a Part 2 to this analysis coming in a few months. (Aaaaand here it is! But you should read this one first, of course.)

(I’ll be referring to the player character as “you” here for ease of wording, but rest assured, this doesn’t mean I’m accusing you the reader of any of the questionable ways the player character treats Kieran. I was also very annoyed at being forced to lie to him, believe me.)

His weakness, and your strength

Kieran is a kid gripped with a crushing sense of inferiority and weakness. We don’t see all of where this came from, although we get a pretty good idea of part of it – his sister. So many times when Kieran tries to protest against things and assert himself, Carmine snaps back at him for doing so. Over time, that kind of thing would have made him feel like he’s wrong for trying to stand up for himself, leading to him letting people walk all over him. I don’t want to give Carmine’s behaviour all of the blame for Kieran’s issues, though, because there’s bound to be more to it than that. I expect some of it also came from him being bullied and outcast during his time at Blueberry Academy – I hope The Indigo Disk gives us glimpses into what Kieran’s life there was like before all this.

As a result of feeling so weak and inferior, Kieran admires and idolises people he sees as strong. This becomes clear early on with how much he looks up to you just for being able to beat his sister, someone else he also sees as strong. Apparently, he couldn’t stop raving about how cool you were and how he wanted to battle you all evening back at home.

He doesn’t want you to know that, though, based on his protest when Carmine comes out and tells you so. Kieran's probably rather embarrassed for you to hear how much he idolises you, after all. He also seems to think his request for a battle would be annoying and a bother – he says “You don’t mind?” in surprise when you accept, even though asking people for battles is supposed to be just what trainers do. Why would a strong trainer like you want to waste your time battling someone weak like him?

Kieran’s comment in the battle if you land a super effective move is also very telling: “Oof, ehehe… I guess I got a lot of weaknesses…” He tries to play it off as light-hearted, but, hm, that sure is A Way for a rival character to comment on you knowing about type matchups. And he most certainly does not seem to agree with his sister when she says he’s almost as strong as her.

(Fun fact: the game actually lets you lose the first battle with each sibling while still continuing the story. If you lose to Kieran in that first battle, he assumes you were holding back against him, as if that’s the only reason he’d ever be able to beat anyone. Perhaps he’s experienced people holding back against him out of pity before – maybe Carmine used to?)

He's flustered when Carmine partners him up with you, too, even though you’re the only option that he has at least a vague rapport with now – he’s still assuming someone cool like you wouldn’t want to waste any more of your time on him than you have to. Kieran worries he’ll “get in your way” if he sticks with you, so he hangs back and stays well out of your way instead. It’s a cute way for the game to justify him not actually following you around in the gameplay even though he’s supposed to be following you according to the plot, but it also just makes perfect sense for Kieran’s character. This is a kid who constantly tries to take up as little space as possible because he’s convinced that nobody wants him around. And it’s important that he seems to feel especially this way towards the people he looks up to (with the exception of Carmine, because she’s family and he spends most of his time with her already).

Then there’s the scene where he meets Koraidon/Miraidon. At first, I assumed it was there to introduce Kieran to our lizardbike friend because they’d be relevant later somehow. But they’re not! So the only reason this scene exists at all is for the purpose of illustrating to Kieran that, in his words, “you’re special”. You are A Protagonist, capable of befriending super special, rare, strong Pokémon with ease. (Just like a certain other special legendary Pokémon you’ll be meeting soon, how about that.)

Admiring the ogre

So, as you begin the trip to visit the signboards about Kitakami’s legend, Kieran starts to open up about how much he likes the ogre. Perhaps he feels safe telling you, because you’re an outsider and won’t frown upon him for it like the locals are prone to do. He probably gets that from them a lot and has learned not to bring up the ogre in town – another thing that makes him feel left out.

Even so, Kieran starts from the angle of “it’s so strong and cool because it won one-on-three”, since that’s a more acceptable reason to like the ogre that doesn’t question the validity of the legend, and is less personal to his issues. If you agree with him that the ogre sounds cool before he’s explained why he thinks so, he responds with “I knew you’d get it!” – you, who’s also really strong and cool, would obviously recognise that same strength in the ogre right away, right?

If you’re sceptical at first instead, he stresses that “it was all alone!” and still managed to hold its own – the more personal side of the reason he likes the ogre coming out just a little. By the second signboard, Kieran’s gotten a bit more comfortable with you, enough to start touching on that more deliberately. He mentions that it’s shunned, and that he likes its strength because he admires that and wishes he could be that strong himself.

Then he invites you to see the ogre’s den, something completely unrelated to the purpose of the school trip, because he trusts you enough to feel sure that you’ll get what he’s trying to illustrate about the ogre there. He points out that it seems like a lonely, miserable place to live, and that he’d happily let the ogre stay at his house if it wanted. He’s not quite explicitly saying so, but Kieran clearly empathises with the ogre because he relates to that kind of loneliness. Though he doesn’t want to outright say that the legend is wrong and the ogre isn’t actually the bad guy – maybe he’s got backlash from the villagers before for suggesting it –  he's got to believe that to be the case.

(I’ve seen one or two people suggest that Kieran fawning over the supposed bad guy in the legend is an early hint to his potential for darkness, but I really don’t think that’s it. There’s plenty of reason for Kieran to relate to and see the sympathetic side of the ogre in the story due to his own status as a social outcast, without it needing to be a case of “he just likes bad guys because he’s Edgy”.)

Later, at the festival, Kieran has a quiet chuckle to himself when Carmine’s talking about the Loyal Three being heroes, and says it’s funny that she doesn’t know anything about the ogre. Then he conspicuously changes the subject when she implies that it’s just that he likes edgy bad guys, because that’s not it – but at least now he has someone who does get it. Carmine mentions later that she feels Kieran is trying to one-up her about the ogre, and maybe this is true. Perhaps this is one small way in which he can privately feel superior to his sister, because he’s more right than her, or than anyone in the village, about the ogre’s true nature. And while that’s more due to luck and a large helping of projecting his own issues onto it than out of any genuine inside knowledge of the truth, Kieran is the one person who understands the ogre best.

Or, at least, he understands it best… for the most part. Because there is one very key way in which Kieran is actually thoroughly wrong about what Ogerpon is truly like.

Misunderstanding the ogre

This begins to be apparent at the second signboard, when Kieran’s gushing about the ogre’s coolness and says “it didn’t even care when everyone shunned it”. From meeting Ogerpon later, we know that this is patently not true about her – she’s terrified of humans because of how they see her, so really she hates being shunned! But Kieran doesn’t imagine that to be the case about her, even though he empathises with her presumed loneliness and is basically projecting his own onto her. He sees the ogre as somebody who is shunned and alone, like he is, but who, unlike him, is strong enough to not let it get to them. Someone in the same bad situation as him, but with strength that he only wishes he could have to deal with it.

In that same conversation at the second signboard, Kieran then goes on to talk about how his sister always does everything for him, and he’d like to become stronger and more independent and reliable. And, “then, just maybe… I could be that ogre’s friend.” As if he doesn’t think he’d deserve to be Ogerpon’s friend unless he was already strong, just like she is.

He mentions a couple of times that he comes to the Dreaded Den a lot but has never once seen the ogre, which might seem a little strange at first. Obviously Ogerpon kept well hidden from him because she’s scared of humans – but, did Kieran never try to call out to her? To tell her that he’s not afraid of her, that he admires her strength and she must be lonely and hey, maybe they could be friends? If he had, then surely over time, Ogerpon would have grown to trust him and shown herself – so apparently, Kieran never did try to call out to her in an attempt to befriend her. Because he felt he wasn’t worthy of her friendship, not when he’s so weak, so inferior to someone as strong and cool as her. (A lot like how he wouldn’t have had the courage to tell you how much he admired you, if his sister hadn’t blurted it out for him.)

While you’re visiting the den with him, Kieran assumes that “a powerful ogre like that would only show up if it heard some kinda battle”, leading to him challenging you again. Since he admires the ogre for its strength, he’s assuming that the ogre also values strength just as much if not more than he does, which really isn’t necessarily true about Ogerpon!

During the battle, Kieran says he’ll “put up a good fight” this time. Which is to say, he still feels so thoroughly outclassed by you that he isn’t remotely expecting or even trying to win – he just wants to at least not go down quite as pitifully as last time, not when he’s potentially being watched by his idol the ogre. And when he loses (the game requires you to win this and all future battles against him), he laments how he’s ever going to be able to beat you, and then he muses, “If the ogre saw that battle, I’m sure it’d be thinking, ‘That kid’s got some real strength…’” He is assuming that Ogerpon would like you, far more than she’d ever like him, because of how strong you are. This is very important.

(As it happens, Ogerpon was secretly watching that battle, but as for whether she’s actually thinking what Kieran imagines she is about your strength – who knows?)

Friendship! Or is it…?

By the end of the den visit, Kieran has just enough confidence to invite you to the Festival of Masks, and to his own house to get ready to go together, which there’s no way he’d have been able to do at the start of the day. He’s so surprised but thrilled to hear that you consider yourself his friend – based on that and his grandparents’ reactions, you’re likely the first friend he’s ever made, which would not be surprising. It’s lovely watching this shy but sweet kid actually smiling and feeling comfortable around you and happy to have someone he can call a friend for the first time ever. And GHHHH it is so painful in hindsight knowing where things are headed.

Even with you calling yourself his friend, though, Kieran still feels inferior to you. He dejectedly offers to give you his mask for the festival when you find yourself without one, even though it’s the ogre mask, his favourite, his thing – because he instinctively feels that if anyone should be the one who gets left out, it should be him, like always, and not you.

The whole time, Kieran’s bound to be feeling thoroughly insecure about this new friendship. The idea that he’s actually made a friend, and not least someone as cool as you, likely feels far too good to be true, more than he deserves, and I suspect he might be constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. When he mentions to Carmine that you’re coming to the festival with him, her response is vaguely evasive, and Kieran responds to that in a very prickly, defensive way. It reads to me like he thinks Carmine is jealous of him befriending you before her, and that he’s afraid she might try to take you away from him as a result. Whether that’s actually true or not isn’t really the point (I think Carmine might indeed be a little jealous, but she would not do something that deliberately malicious) – what matters is that Kieran believes this may be the case and is liable to view all further interactions with you and Carmine in that light.

Then, at the festival, Carmine pressures Kieran into playing Ogre Oustin’ even though he doesn’t really want to. She’s probably doing this in an attempt to encourage him to have fun, but since he doesn’t find it fun (because he doesn't like this game where he's pretend-killing the ogre!), it’d be easy for him to feel like she only did it because she wanted him out of the way so she could hang out with you. And it’s while Kieran’s doing that that you and Carmine meet Ogerpon without him. Of course, that’s nothing but pure unlucky bad timing – Carmine had no idea Ogerpon was about to show up – but from Kieran’s point of view, with his obvious history of being maliciously left out of things by others, it’s easy for him to feel like there was some deliberate element to it.

At first he doesn’t know it has anything to do with Ogerpon, though. But still, when he gets back from Ogre Oustin’ and asks what you two were up to, Carmine abruptly shuts you up before you can speak and is blatantly hiding something – which Kieran takes to mean that you were laughing at him behind his back. That’s something else he must get a lot, for him to be automatically assuming it’s happening here. Really not so far off from his fear that his sister’s going to try and take you away from him, either.

Carmine’s lie isn’t done out of any malice – she is genuinely trying to protect her brother from feeling bad over being left out of meeting Ogerpon – but she sure is doing so in a way that’s going to make him feel even worse over being left out on purpose once he realises the truth. Carmine does care about her brother in theory, but this girl has zero social brain cells. And we the player are forced to play along with the lie whether we want to or not, which awkwardly turns our player-insert character into a very specific kind of character who would do so. I guess they either also have zero social brain cells, or they’re kind of a doormat who’s swayed by a forceful personality like Carmine’s. This part is frustrating, but I have to accept it because of the delightful things it does to Kieran’s arc, which really is the important part here.

Learning of the lie

The next morning, it seems like Kieran’s largely managed to brush off the weird bit last night where you and his sister were maybe laughing at him behind his back, because he greets you with a smile, ready to go see the last signboard. And then Carmine… forcefully demands that he finds somewhere else to be, because you’ve got business with her. Kieran protests that it’s not fair that you’ve been spending all your time with her lately – score two for his fear that she’s trying to take you away from him – and when she snaps back at his protest like always, he runs off.

But he doesn’t run off that far, because he stays close enough to listen in on the conversation. The discussion of Ogerpon’s story goes on for long enough – and takes long enough to get to the important part – that Kieran pretty much has to have stayed to eavesdrop on purpose, which is a little sketchy of him. Still, I can’t blame him all that much, what with his background of being mistreated, and the way Carmine’s behaviour gives him ample reason to be afraid there’s something going on here – of course he’d have wanted to know for sure. Perhaps he was even trying to hope that listening in would prove that you’re not actually hiding something bad from him and he was just being paranoid.

Except that actually, it turns out the truth is so much worse than Kieran had feared. Never mind just laughing at him – you and Carmine met the ogre without him and then hid it from him as if he didn’t even deserve to know. And, as if that wasn’t bad enough, it then turns out that he was right all along about the ogre being a good guy, and his own grandpa didn’t even think it was worth telling him that, and now you’re still just going to keep lying to him about it all and leaving him in the dark.

(Really, I have to side-eye their grandpa a lot more than Carmine here, because he’s a grown dang adult and has so much less excuse. He says he’ll tell Kieran the truth “when the time is right”, but what does that even mean? The “right time” would be right now! Heck, it should have been the moment he realised that Kieran had already intuited the truth!)

And all this being lied to and shunned and left out of things (like always) stings even more for Kieran because it’s coming from someone he’d thought was his friend. He’d actually dared to hope that someone – and not just anyone, someone really cool and strong – actually wanted to be friends with him? Of course that was too good to be true. Why would someone as cool and strong as you have ever wanted to befriend a weak loser like him, anyway? (After all, cool strong people only ever want to be friends with other cool strong people; that’s how it works, right?)

Probing about the lie

The correct thing for Kieran to do with this situation would have been to simply come right out and confront you about the lie. But of course he doesn’t have the courage to do that. He’s far too used to being shot down whenever he tries to assert and stand up for himself (no thanks to Carmine). And since he only learned about this because he was eavesdropping, it’s easy for him to imagine having that turned against him, and the whole situation being treated like he’s the one in the wrong for doing that.

Still, it seems like Kieran might want to at least indirectly give you the opportunity to tell him the truth. He heads off to the village shop to act like he was there the whole time, and then casually asks you what you were talking about back there. He’s maybe trying to hope that you don’t really want to lie to him and only got swept up into doing so by his sister’s forcefulness, and that you’ll tell him everything now that she’s not here, because, you said you were his friend, right? Later on, too, at the third signboard, the way Kieran brings up that his family is descended from the mask maker feels suspiciously relevant, as if he only thought to do so because he overheard the story and is trying to give you a chance to go, “Hey, speaking of that mask maker, actually…”

But no. It sure seems like you’re very deliberately choosing to keep him in the dark. As such, he’s bound to be feeling extra small and awkward at the signboard, just wanting to “get this over with” and be done spending time with you, because you clearly don’t want to waste any more of your time with him than you have to, right? The awkwardness of the third signboard photo, with Kieran obviously not wanting to be there, and your character’s very strained thumbs-up, is heartbreaking in comparison to how cute and happy the first two were.

During the conversation there, Kieran mentions the ogre being alone and treated like an outcast in a way that is very clearly also talking about how you and Carmine are treating him right now. The game pointedly lingers on his response to your comment, regardless of which dialogue option you choose. If you agree that that sounds awful, he says, “You think so too, huh?” – you think that it’s bad to treat someone that way, and yet, you sure are treating him that way anyway. If you instead mutter an awkward apology, Kieran asks, “For what?” This could read like he’s calling you out for not being able to admit to what you should be apologising for, but actually, I’m not sure that’s it. It could also be him genuinely asking that, because he doesn’t realise you need to apologise for anything. Hold this thought, I’ll go into it more in a bit.

It's because he’s weak

The other thing that happens at the third signboard is Kieran challenging you to another battle. He doesn’t really explain why, but I suspect he’s hoping that if he wins and proves his strength to you, you might just tell him the truth, or at least it’ll give him the courage to confront you about your lie. This is the first battle in which he says he wants to win and is actively trying and hoping to do so, rather than just accepting his loss before he’s even started. His optimism is pretty fragile, though, as he laments “it wasn’t supposed to go like this” if you hit him super-effectively, and “why does it have to be like this?” when he’s down to his last Pokémon.

But of course, he loses, just like he must secretly have been expecting to all along (how could he ever beat someone as strong as you?). And so he concludes, “it’s all ‘cause I’m too weak” – not just losing the battle, but everything. Why he’s always left out and shunned by everyone, why you lied to him and went behind his back about something you knew was important to him – it’s because he’s weak. He was battling you to try and prove that he’s stronger, strong enough to deserve better than that… but of course he isn’t.

A particularly important little subtlety is that he mutters “That’s why I…” – because it would have been easy to expect this line to say “you” instead. That you lied to him and shunned him because he’s weak, that it’s your fault for choosing to treat someone weak like this. But Kieran isn’t framing it that way. He’s thinking of it as his fault, simply for being weak, and that’s why he will always inevitably be treated like crap by everyone around him. As if that’s nobody else’s fault for choosing to do that, but simply the natural way of things when someone’s weak. As if he deserves this for being weak.

(So: what are you sorry for? You shouldn’t be sorry for anything; it’s his fault, isn’t it? Someone as strong and perfect as you could never be conflicted or in the wrong.)

By the end of this signboard visit, Kieran’s leaving on his own, saying that he’s got to get stronger with his Pokémon. All of this is happening because he’s weak, so he needs to be stronger – and apparently, that means “strength in Pokémon battling”. In reality, even if he did become the best battler out there, that wouldn’t necessarily make him any better at standing up for himself in social situations or being independent and reliable in other ways, but he’s very much conflating the different kinds of strength. This probably has a lot to do with his schooling at Blueberry Academy, which teaches Pokémon battling, leaving him overly focused on battling strength as the only kind of strength that matters. Perhaps he was picked on at school because he wasn’t very good at the battling classes, which wouldn’t have helped. I hope we see some glimpses of this in The Indigo Disk.

And on the topic of Kieran fixating on getting stronger at Pokémon battling: his Furret is never seen in his team again after this point. It was one of the first two Pokémon he used against you, so it’s presumably one of his closest Pokémon partners, which makes it heartbreaking that he ditches it from his team because, clearly, it’s too weak. Even worse, he’s inflicting being left out and shunned on someone else – someone he probably cared about – precisely because it’s weak. That’s just what happens to people who are weak, right? Guh. Poor Furret.

Outburst at Loyalty Plaza

Kieran most likely spends the next 24 hours alternating between fervently training as hard as he can, and stewing in his feelings of loneliness and rejection and betrayal. His grandpa mentions that he spent that night in his room after not even eating dinner, which, yeah, when he’s sharing a house with two of the people who are lying to him, not surprising. Oof. And more than just pain and betrayal, he’s got to be feeling so much anger, anger which he’s never been able to truly express, because every time he tries to stand up for himself he always gets shot down – but that only makes the suppressed anger worse.

The correct thing to do would have been for Kieran to confront everyone calmly about the lie as soon as he became aware of it. But because he couldn’t just do that, his resentment festered inside of him with no real outlet, until finally it becomes unbearable and explodes out of him and he has to do something to express it, no matter how questionable. So he steals the Teal Mask and runs off with it.

I don’t think Kieran actually has much of an idea of what he’s going to do with the mask. The one logical thing would have been to give it back to Ogerpon himself, but that can’t be his intent, because he doesn’t go anywhere near her den with it. And I highly doubt he’s planning to break it or anything like that, since he’d never do something that’d hurt Ogerpon. Really, I think he just wants you and Carmine to notice and acknowledge what he’s going through and what you’ve done to him – and if he steals the mask, you’re going to have to confront him to get it back.

He heads to Loyalty Plaza in particular because he’s conflating his own situation with Ogerpon’s. In amongst his pain and anger at the way he’s being treated, he’d have also been feeling a lot of anger at the injustice of how Ogerpon was and is treated, because he was right all along that she was never the bad guy, but she’s shunned undeservedly while the “Loyal” Three are lauded as heroes. Even though this outburst from Kieran is really all about his own situation, he makes it about Ogerpon first, because that’s easier for him to openly be angry about. He only brings up his own treatment as a comparison to how Ogerpon is treated like an outcast, as if the only way he can frame it as wrong in his head is by comparing it to something that’s definitely wrong. (After all, he deserves to be shunned because he’s weak – but Ogerpon didn’t deserve any of it, because she’s so much stronger!)

During Kieran’s outburst, Carmine blurts out an apology on realising that she’s hurt him – but Kieran basically just ignores it and continues to vent. Which tells us something interesting: that Kieran never did this out of any attempt to get you and Carmine to apologise for lying to him. If he’d wanted that, he’d have reacted in some way when Carmine did just that. So I think, in keeping with Kieran’s belief that all this is his fault for being weak, he doesn’t actually think you two need to apologise for anything. He’s lashing out because he’s angry and in pain and doesn’t know how else to deal with it, but he’s not consciously thinking that you and Carmine are in the wrong.

He’s also still holding onto the idea that you and Carmine were just laughing at him behind his back, which is of course not true, but when Carmine tries to say that, Kieran snaps back that she’s a liar. Given that she undeniably has lied to him about one very important thing, of course Kieran would find it easy to believe that she could be lying to him about anything and he can’t trust any reassurance she gives him. This poor kid must have such a history of being mistreated and patronised by others to jump to assuming things like this.

Lashing out with a battle

Then Kieran challenges you to another battle, promising to give back the mask if you win. Since there’s no way he is truly expecting to be able to beat you, this means that he never really intended to keep the mask forever. But he also doesn’t just want to seem like some weak pushover who’ll roll over and give in as soon as he’s confronted, so he at least wants to make you fight him for it. And based on his line at the beginning of the battle – “I know this isn’t right, but… I can’t just hand over the mask to you!” – he doesn’t want to just give up one of Ogerpon’s possessions so easily to someone who treated him like an outcast the same way those villagers back then treated Ogerpon.

Really, I think the battle – and the notably forceful way he asks for it, unlike the previous times – just comes a lot from Kieran’s anger, and his need to externalise it somehow. He even insists that he needs this battle, if you’re hesitant about accepting the challenge. There’s probably a part of him that wants to lash out with physical violence, maybe punch you or something, but he knows that’s wrong and that it’d look pathetically impotent of him anyway even if he tried. Happily, this world has a socially-accepted form of violence-by-proxy instead, so Pokémon battle it is!

As for the battle itself, Kieran’s switched up his team some more, removing Furret as previously mentioned, and adding two new members instead of just one like the previous times – but the Cramorant he uses here doesn’t stick around either. This is less sad to me than Furret, though, because he wouldn’t have been very close to it. Cramorant may even have been taken onto the team with the condition of “I’m trying out new team members to see who’s strong enough”, at which point ditching it is less of a betrayal and more of it simply failing a job interview.

(Meanwhile, the other newcomer, Gligar, clearly impressed Kieran a lot with its strength, as it becomes his ace for the final fight. Fitting that his ace there is not a long-time partner, but one obtained only after he began to fixate on getting stronger.)

He’s also more openly determined to win (despite his suppressed conviction that he could never beat you), and remains more optimistic than before even when things aren’t going so well for him. In fact, this is the only battle in which Kieran has lines for hitting you with a super effective move or a critical hit. That said, he’s still a little insecure, based on an optional line: “I need to get this right… I’m gonna make sure to give the right commands!” which tells us that he feels like his losses are his fault for making mistakes and choosing the wrong moves, rather than blaming his Pokémon for not being strong enough. He also has an absolutely great comment in this battle if you land a critical hit, which I have to highlight: “What can’t you do? You’re like the hero in a story…” It’s purely luck, but despite that, he’s seeing you as this impossibly perfect hero that he could never ever measure up to, and this delights me.

Losing the battle just seems to make Kieran’s frustration at his own inferiority even worse, to the point that he does indulge in some physical violence, towards the shrine. Which is as pathetic as he must have been expecting, and should in theory have been harmless enough. (Of course, it appears that this is what somehow resurrects the Lousy Three, but there is no way Kieran expected or wanted that to happen, so he can’t be blamed for that.) Then he gives the mask back, just as he promised he would, and (ignoring another attempt by Carmine to apologise – again, this was never about that to him) he runs off back home.

So I find it really hard to condemn Kieran for… any of his actions here? Sure, he stole the mask, but he didn’t do anything bad with it and gave it back just fine (and must have always been intending to). All he was doing was lashing out – unhealthily, but basically harmlessly – over the really very callous way you and Carmine had been treating him. And if he hadn’t done this, you two would probably never have told him the truth about Ogerpon, and he’d have remained out of the loop and never met her at all! That would have been awful!

And yet: making you and Carmine bring him into the loop about Ogerpon and getting the chance to meet her is also not something Kieran was aiming for here. Just before leaving in a sulk, he says, “Say hi to the ogre for me” – which means that he never expected to get to meet it himself. He is still, even by the end of this confrontation, labouring under the belief that you and Carmine don’t want him there with Ogerpon and that he doesn’t deserve to meet her at all.

Apologies, and a lack thereof

After you rescue Ogerpon from being bullied by the resurrected Lousy Three, Carmine shows up with Kieran in tow. Apparently she found him moping around at home and dragged him here to apologise to you about his stunt with the mask. Which, yes, does warrant an apology – but what really frustrates me about this part is that Carmine doesn’t apologise for what you and she did wrong. Sure, she blurted out a couple of cut-off apologies back at Loyalty Plaza, but those never had the intended effect when Kieran was in no emotional state to accept them. Here and now, he’s calmed down enough that he would be able to take on board an apology… but Carmine doesn’t give one. It’s possible that she already apologised at home before bringing him here, but if she’d done that, then she really ought to have got you to also apologise for lying to him, and she doesn’t – so I can only assume that didn’t happen. And you the player can choose to apologise to Kieran here anyway, but since it’s optional, it’s not given nearly the attention it deserves.

Since Kieran never gets a proper apology while he’s in a state to listen, it means he never actually ends up internalising the fact that you were in the wrong to lie to him and he didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Which would have been a really, really important thing for him to realise! As it is, he continues to quietly assume that all of this is his fault for being weak, with nobody to tell him that this way of thinking is flawed.

It's frustrating, but I do kind of get it, from Carmine at least, because she’s also a pretty flawed person. Her deal seems to be that she’s only able to be emotionally sincere in uncontrolled outbursts when she’s worked up, and when she’s calm she covers up her true feelings with bossiness and vanity. Which makes her not at all capable of apologising to Kieran when he’s in a calm enough state to be capable of registering it. These siblings’ issues do not mesh well. Still, here’s hoping that Carmine’s able to self-reflect enough to acknowledge her partial responsibility for Kieran’s suffering by the end of The Indigo Disk.

She does seem to realise her mistake here enough to make a point of trying to include Kieran in their Ogerpon adventures from here on out, at least. But it’s too little too late in terms of how Kieran views things. He seems to have assumed that Carmine dragged him here only to apologise, and not to properly meet Ogerpon or be involved in helping her out, because he expresses surprise when Carmine casually includes him as part of the Mask Retrieval Squad. He was expecting to be shunned and left out as always – what do you mean, she wants him there?

Meeting Ogerpon

The only interaction Kieran was expecting to have with Ogerpon here was giving the fixed-up mask back to her, because he wanted to be the one to do so – but she shies away from him when he offers it. Carmine comments that she’s probably scared of new people, and this is likely the truth, but Kieran’s silent response suggests that he’s not necessarily agreeing with that assessment. Remember, from earlier: Kieran is convinced that Ogerpon values strength. And he’s so used to being shunned by others, especially strong people, because he’s weak. It would be very, very easy for him to come to the irrational conclusion that the reason Ogerpon refuses him is because of his weakness, even though his sister’s suggesting something else.

Despite Kieran’s key misconceptions about Ogerpon’s values, he does continue to understand her better than most people in certain ways. When you try to head into town with her, Kieran’s the one to point out that she’s probably afraid to go in because of the way she’s been treated by the townspeople. He also comments that she’ll feel safe going to retrieve the masks from the Three as long as she’s with you. He empathises with that insecurity and social anxiety enough that, seeing it from Ogerpon in person, he can instinctively see that’s the case about her too.

And yet… seeing Ogerpon’s fear, and understanding that she’s scared of being shunned just like him (which he previously said the ogre didn’t care at all about!), doesn’t actually change the part of Kieran that is also irrationally convinced that she only cares about strength. There’s no moment in which he seems to be re-evaluating Ogerpon or realising anything new about her upon seeing her being afraid. The part where she’s shy and afraid, and the part where she’s strong and cool and therefore values strength in others, manage to be separate enough in his mind that he never actually cross-references them to realise that one of these surely can’t be as true as he thinks it is. So his false conviction that things are about strength to Ogerpon still remains, unchallenged.

Staying behind

Then, even though Carmine is making an active point of trying to include him, Kieran… chooses not to come with you on the mission to retrieve the masks. This is despite the fact that this’d be his best chance to spend time with Ogerpon and hopefully get her to warm up to him, which you’d think would be his priority when he’s quietly hoping to maybe have the chance to become her partner.

But even though it would be a logical choice for Kieran to come with them, it makes perfect sense to me why he doesn’t. As far as he sees things, you and Carmine are way stronger than him and already have the fights against the Three covered – he’d be nothing but a useless third wheel hanging back, only there out of Carmine’s pity for him and not because he’s needed. And in terms of Ogerpon, Kieran is the kid who visited her den countless times but never had the courage to call out to her and ask to be friends. Of course he knows he wouldn’t have the confidence to actually try and get closer to Ogerpon, especially not when she’s already got someone she likes (someone who’s strong while he’s weak, which is clearly what matters to her, right). He knows he’ll just spend the whole time watching Ogerpon obviously like you way more than him while not being able to do a thing about it, and it’ll just make him feel even more jealous and left out.

(Trust me, as someone with social anxiety who spent a lot of my childhood being low-key outcasted by my so-called friend groups, I get it. When you’ve lived like that, integrating yourself with new people can feel downright impossible, no matter how much you may want it.)

So Kieran doesn’t come on the mission – but it’s not like he just uselessly sulks around, either. He spends the time doing something else to help Ogerpon, something neither you nor Carmine seemingly thought needed to be done: telling the town the truth that she was never a bad guy. Because of course Kieran understands best just how hard it is for Ogerpon to be shunned and outcast by everyone, and of course he has some Strong Feelings that people deserve to be told the truth, hmm I wonder where that might have come from. This task is really difficult and scary for him, too, because he hates talking to people – but he does it anyway, for Ogerpon’s sake! What a brave lad!

(I’ve seen people side-eye the fact that the villagers accept the truth and turn around their view of Ogerpon so easily, but honestly it doesn’t seem unreasonable to me. I get the mask maker way back when being persecuted because the villagers of the time saw Ogerpon kill the Three and made assumptions, but, like, it’s been generations. All of the witnesses who had that emotional gut reaction to the fight are long dead. Most of the people alive today didn’t even truly believe the story of the ogre was real until the Loyal Three showed up – they just thought it was a fun folktale that gives their village some unique culture. So for them to be told “hey, the ogre is real, but also the story’s backwards and the ogre’s actually the good guy”… so what? I was always sceptical of Grandpa’s conviction that the truth must never be told to the village (because… people will get angry that they were lied to? So therefore you should just keep lying to them so they never find out they have something to be angry about? Yes, great tactic, it worked so well on Kieran). Kieran basically just went and proved that there really was nothing to be worried about all along and the people should have been told the truth ages ago.)

His final chance to be strong

So now we reach the end, where Ogerpon makes it clear that she wants to stay with you, and… and even though he must have seen this coming, Kieran can’t accept it happening without trying to fight against it.

This isn’t even really about Kieran wanting Ogerpon’s friendship in and of itself. It’s more about what the concept of being partners with Ogerpon means to him. This whole time, he’s been obsessed with the ogre, and yet only letting himself imagine that maybe one day when he’s stronger, he could be its friend. He’s fixated on the idea of befriending Ogerpon as something that will mean he’s strong and no longer alone and everything is good now. Obviously this is extremely irrational and not necessarily true nor the sole way to fix his problems, but that’s how things are in Kieran’s head.

And so, with recent events making him feel even more weak and outcast than ever, you being effortlessly strong and cool enough to befriend Ogerpon on top of everything else feels to Kieran like it’s about to take away his one chance to turn things around, forever. Of course he can’t just let that happen without at least trying to have things his way. He says right at the beginning of the battle: “I know you’re probably a better trainer for Ogerpon, but I… I…” – and he can’t even voice the end of that sentence. He can’t put into words why he feels like he needs to become Ogerpon’s partner even though he knows he's being selfish and she’d be better off with you, because it’s not based in any conscious logic and is all just one big subconscious irrational mess of his issues and inferiority complex.

I’ve seen a lot of people condemn Kieran for this part, saying that he’s ignoring Ogerpon’s wishes because he’s planning to force her to join him whether she wants to or not if he wins. However, I firmly disagree that Kieran has any such thing in mind here. Remember, he’s still labouring under the misconception that what Ogerpon cares about most is strength. He thinks she likes you so much because you’re so strong (remember the previous time he battled you in front of the den, where he commented that the ogre must be thinking how strong you are if it’d seen that?), and that she refused the mask from him that one time because he’s weak. So Kieran has convinced himself that if he can prove himself to be stronger than you, by defeating you in a battle while Ogerpon’s watching, then she’ll naturally choose him to be her trainer over you. Right?

When Carmine says that he has to consider Ogerpon’s feelings, Kieran’s simply silent for a moment before saying “…I want to battle anyway.” He’s not denying that Ogerpon’s choice is what matters – he just believes, or is at least trying to believe, that her choice will be determined by this battle. And of course he doesn’t say anything like “Ogerpon will choose me if I’m stronger than you”, because – well, perhaps because a lot of this is also subconscious enough that he can’t articulate it, but even if any of it was conscious, he knows it’d sound stupid. Especially the part where he’d be talking like it’s possible for him to beat you, because deep down, he still completely convinced that’s impossible.

Plus, nowhere in this does Kieran bring up the fact that he told the village the truth about Ogerpon as a point in his favour for why she might choose him – which supports that it’s not about any kind of friendly gestures to him and he’s convinced she’ll make her decision entirely based on strength. (And it also proves that he did that out of a genuine desire to help Ogerpon, without any ulterior motives of trying to get her to like him!)

Just before the battle, he says: “Whoever wins gets to be Ogerpon’s partner… So don’t… don’t you dare hold back!” – making a point of demanding you don’t hold back, even though you might think he’d want any advantage he can get towards supposedly winning Ogerpon’s favour. But this makes perfect sense when you realise what this is about to Kieran. He believes that Ogerpon will choose (and deserves to choose) whichever of you is the strongest, and this battle won’t actually prove that if he only wins because you were holding back against him.

Kieran also thanks you for not holding back when you land your first super effective hit, which I enjoy. He’s so used to being patronised and seen as weak and pathetic, so he’s actually glad that you’re taking him seriously and viewing him as a legitimate opponent.

And, hey, he is! His team is pretty stacked: a full six Pokémon with solid movesets, and even strategic held items (at least in the postgame version). Assuming you’re not over-levelled, it’s quite a challenging fight, as it should be. Kieran is trying so, so hard to be strong enough, because this poor kid has convinced himself that all of his problems and pain are due to him being weak, and he is so desperate to fix that by proving himself even stronger than you, strong enough to win Ogerpon’s favour.

When he loses, he just crumples, and it’s heartbreaking. Kieran had so much more riding on this battle than just befriending Ogerpon – this was what felt like his one and only chance to stamp out the part of him that feels crushingly inferior and like he deserves to be treated like dirt. Guhhh.

And of course the first thing out of his mouth is, “Figures.” His inferiority complex runs so deep that, no matter how hard he’d trained and how genuinely really good his team had grown, he never truly believed that he ever had a chance at beating someone as cool and strong as you. He was just desperately trying to convince himself that he at least had a shot, because he couldn’t bear to give up without trying.

I really wish you could tell Kieran how good he was in this battle! It truly is impressive how much better he’s grown at battling since the first one, in such a short space of time, too. Just because he’s not quite as strong as you doesn’t mean he’s weak, not by a long shot. But nobody tells him any such thing, so Kieran continues to view things in that irrationally all-or-nothing way. He lost, so he's weak, end of.

Then he has to stand there and watch you battle Ogerpon in order to catch her. Before all of this happened, Kieran would have been so stoked to see his hero the ogre showing off just how cool and strong she is – and hey, her powers really are pretty awesome to behold! But here, despite the amazing spectacle in front of him, Kieran just looks supremely awkward. Like he doesn’t feel like he deserves to be here. Like he doesn’t even have the right to get to see Ogerpon’s full strength in all its glory. You’re the only one who’s strong enough to have earned this.

He does make one possible comment during the battle, if you land a critical hit on Ogerpon: “You really are good… I’m no match.” Which is a bit excessive, considering that really anyone is capable of critting Ogerpon if they get lucky – but apparently Kieran’s thoughts during this battle are still incredibly hung up on just how strong you are and how he’ll never be able to measure up to you. This goes to show that his issues at this point have shifted to be more about you than about Ogerpon. Which tracks, since his admiration for the ogre was never quite about Ogerpon herself and was more about what her strength represented to him – and now you’ve come along and given him an even bigger example of impossibly cool strength, in a much more painful way.

Once you’ve captured Ogerpon, Kieran manages to awkwardly congratulate you on it – hey, he’s doing his best not to be a sore loser! – laments once again why he can’t be like you, and then runs off. No doubt he’s feeling a huge heap of uncontainable painful emotions that he does not want to show in front of you or Carmine and needs to go let out in private. This kid is Not Okay.

So, in summary: Kieran comes out of all this with the message that all of his pain and suffering and loneliness is his fault because he’s still too weak, and he will only ever be strong enough to put all that behind him once he’s stronger than you. And to do that, he needs to get so, so much stronger, almost impossibly so, no matter what he has to do to achieve it. I’m sure this will be Just Fine leading into The Indigo Disk. (: (: (:

And one last thing: the game doesn’t let this happen, but if Kieran had won that final battle against you, I believe things might actually have turned out better. Because let’s face it, Ogerpon would probably still have chosen to go with you anyway, and if she had, Kieran would have been forced to face the fact that it was never actually about strength to her. It wouldn’t even be that hard for him to understand that, given that he’d already noticed the indications that she was scared of being shunned by the townspeople and that she liked you because you made her feel safe. This would help Kieran recontextualise things a little and stop focusing so unhealthily on gaining more battling strength as the One Thing that will solve all his problems. He still wouldn’t exactly be suddenly fixed and happy, but… things wouldn’t be quite so bad, at least. Alas, you are Too Protagonist to lose and let that happen.