#ah.. im just feeling depressed as shit today

[mangostar]

i hate having to do life,..  :(

[witchykittyy]

Agreement 💖

@marcyyywukinnie asked: Hi could you make a fanfic Yandare Blitzo x reader x Yandare Stolas where they just fight about reader, before coming to terms that theyll share them??

I am soooooooo sorry about how late this is!!! I really am. Life's been really hectic and I went through a very depressive episode but I promise to be on top of stuff more often! I really hope you like it! ❤ Sorry if its not really enough fighting per say. 😅

TW: Demons, Hell, Blood, Arguing, Cursing (lots of it), Mentions of kidnapping, Stalking, and other yandere themes.

"Damn that was a fuck ton of clients!!!" Millie jumped up into Moxxie's arms pumped and covered in blood. "Yea it was and it was so fucking awesome! But I think imma head in for the night." You're the newest member of I.M.P. A few days ago you saw their help wanted poster and decided you needed the extra money so you decided to join. You got along really well with Moxxie, Millie and surprisingly Loona. The only person who doesn't seem to like you is Blitzo. He was always staring at you. Watching your every move like he's waiting for you to do something wrong. So you always tend to keep your distance.

"Yea I think me and Millie have had enough excitement for today as well. Goodbye sir! Goodbye Y/N!" "Bye Blizto! Bye N/N!" Moxxie and Millie wave goodbye as they leave. "Whatever, bye." Loona continues on reading her magazine. "Bye guys!" You wave goodbye to them sweetly. "Bye lovebirds! Don't get too kinky while I'm away!" You can almost hear Moxxie rolling his eyes at those words and you chuckle. Now its just you, Loona and... Blitzo. Though your back is turned you can feel his eyes burning into info our skin, its very unsettling so with out turning around you decided to say your goodbyes and leave. "Bye Blitzo! Bye Loona!" "Bye dork." Blitzo doesnt say anything and you start to walk off sill feeling his gaze on you. Suddenly he says "See you soon Y/N"

You got home and were extremely exhausted as you flopped down onto your semi comfortable bed. Due to only recently having a job you dont have that much money to buy yourself a nice place so for right now you're stuck in this crummy apartment. Even though you didnt mind your situation someone else did.

Stolas has been watching you from the day he saw you in the I.M.P headquarters while he was visiting Blitzo. He's been obssessed with you ever since he saw you and has stalked you finding out your likes, habits, dislikes and everything else about you. He truly believes that you deserve so much better than what you have. He loves you and believes you deserve to be treated like a queen. A problem with that is that Blizto is also in love with you. Stolas notices the stares he give you and the longing look in his eyes. He's sure Blitzo has noticed his interest as well and thats probably why Blitzo hasnt spoken to him. But nevermind that.

You change into your PJ', get into bed and start scrolling through Helltok. "Ah shit its getting dark and I have to work tomorrow" you sigh. "I guess I should go to bed as Moxxie would say thats the responsible thing to do." You turn off your phone and go to bed. Stolas stares at you from the window wishing that he were next to you.

After a while he sees someone climbing onto your balcony. He's about to go stop him but then the two lock eyes. "Stolas?! The fuck are you doing here?!" He almost tumbles off the balcony from the surprise. "I should be asking you the same question Blitzo." "Look dipshit im doing the same thing you are but going inside." Blizto starts opening the window. "Wait! We shouldnt do that it invading her privacy." He goes to stop him but then Blitzo slaps his hand away. "Oh and stalking her isnt invading her privacy?! Look just leave ok if you dont wanna do this. Not like I want you stealing my girl anyways." He grumbles the last part but Stolas is able to hear him. "Well I sure as hell am not leaving her alone with you." "Then come in with me." He grabs Stolas's hand and stealthly brings him into the room. Stolas blushes at the sudden contact. 'Wait why'd he blush? What the hell is happening to him?'

You're dead asleep on the bed. "So smart ass what do we do now?" He tries to cover up the fact that grabbing Blitzo's hand made him blush. "We look around bird brain." They start looking around the crummy place, dodging the clothes thrown on the floor. Eventually after looking around for a while Blitzo decides to look your computer as Stolas watches you sleep peacefully. Out of the corner of his eye Stolas sees him breaking into your computer. "Hey!" He yells silently. "What do you think you're doing?" "I'm looking through her computer dipshit." Blitzo rolls his eyes as though its obvious. "Well yes I know that but why?" "To make sure she ain't seeing some other loser."

Blitzo searches and suddenly stops dead in his tracks. "You need to see this birdie." They stare at the computer reading you're messages with some guy named Dennis. "Oh hell no" they growl out in unison. You whine and shift in your sleep as they go dead silent. Once they're sure you're not awake they continue. "We can't let this shit happen." Blitzo growls with malice. "I completely agree. This dirt bag isn't good enough for our Y/N." Stolas nods. "Wait, our?" "Well yes I suppose we'll need to team up to stop this guy and ensure that she stays with us. Is that an ok arrangement?" Stolas questions. "Yea.. Thatd be great." Blitzo looks down blushing madly.

[melissa-titanium]

hrng. the bane of my existence is decidijgnbetween drawing n slightly shorter than v OR slightly taller. i tjink J is the shortest so shes out of the question but making n tall is cliche BUT making v tall to me is like making myself short and i cannot be short. i cant be short id aftually rather get hit by a truck. v taller is funnier but n taller is Good for my brain + also works eith how i draw him. v is more stout and square while n is gangly as fuck and uzi is a happy medium being kind of short but SHARP with lots of tendrils/longer bits. also i feel loke as ive drawn doll & realized she looks like a twilight sparkle gijinka ive actually started to fall hard into that which is Undesirable. if shes a gijinka of anyone it better be maud pie on steroids. rules for my doll design; square. well kept enough that you aren't immediately weirded out but not well kept enough that suspicions dont start to arise when you look a little closer. doesn't smile enough for her teeth to poke out, but theyre longer than uzi's; she never had correction like uzi did. wearing a headband to be remniscent of dds. all her outfits are off-shoulder bcos she will overheat if not. two lines down her cheeks to look like "doll cheeks"??? cyn also has these but theyre meant to be more puppetlike. i usually try to dapple in lore elements in designs but thats just cosmetic. um. what else. AH OK. scarcely expressive, but when she is its ALL OUT. this is kinda canon actually. every time we see her express save for two instances that i can think of. shes totally deranged. killing the student @ the start of promening. fucking wit v. running away in dead end. like in every other instance sjes either :| or >:| but then when she ACTUALLY expresses shes like HHRHAHAHRRHWGWEORORWGGER. RABID ANIMALEWOROORIEUWWYGWG. hrng but then againnthis is a lot to think about when im. judt drawing & doodling. i need to find a good middleground between doodling and looking decent. NO I JUDT NEED TO FIND OUT HOW TO DRAW FASTER. i think too much WHEN im drawing but i ened to be doing the thinking BEFORE i draw. ugh i dont even know if this is artblock or not i think its my depression OK WOW majorly offtopic. i know ep 7 will make me insanely diseased 2morro so ill be good. dpring break too WOOHOO!!! i ended up clearing some dms today because. its. been lokg enough. but also i honestly dunnou if i will be checking shit during spring break. homework. maybe summer? not 2 far away. but then again thats when i will be taking drivers ed. hrrng. what EVAR. ill figuer it out :) i think im done. my head is most active when im forced to sleep so i need to ramble or ill go crauzysauce!!!!!! 2 say i am not a morning dragon would be tha understatement of the century. what 14 years of a sporadic peeper schedule and 2 years of no school does 2 a mfucker

ok anyways. ep seven. smile

[bitetherabbit]

vent// tw sh and emotional abuse

im crying and i feel so paralyzed and i can't move from my bed and i don't feel real and i just wish someone could come to me and say "it's gonna be ok, i see you, you're going through it right now and that's ok" but nobody ever checks in! my family? even though they know what i've been through but they never ask me about it or how i'm doing. do i even have any friends? i have one close friend who asks me how i am but they're going through their own shit right now so i just avoid talking about how im really feeling so i don't burden them with it. aside from that nobody ever contacts me to just chat or anything. none of my old friends. or my online friends. im always the one reaching out but it never lasts they don't keep the convo going and it dies out again. so nothing from nobody. i have to be the one to take care of myself and i have a hard enough time doing that on a good day. another fucking day wasted. today is gone and ive done nothing except hate myself and shut down. i have so many chores piled up that need doing and with executive dysfunction on top of dissociation im just ignoring everything making it worse for myself. i was awake for 5 hours before i remembered to eat something, and now it's been 5 more hours. my awareness of my body's needs becomes even worse when i feel depressed. and the WORST part of all this is i can't stop thinking about HIM. if he didn't fucking treat me the way he did when i was growing up maybe i'd be a somewhat functional person now, instead of having to deal with my own brain sabotaging me because im stuck in a trauma response without any way to practice healthier coping strategies. and i made the mistake of reading old messages because i go through cycles of not believing what happened to me, and it's like i constantly need to prove it to myself with the evidence i still have (written words). are you happy Dad??? is this what you wanted for me??? how could someone fucking do this to a child and not be aware of it?? and people do WORSE SHIT than what i experienced! it's fucking FUCKED UP. and now i feel FUCKED UP and broken because of it. like who survives this crap and thinks "ah yes, when i feel bad now i'm gonna cut myself! that's a solution!" why is that a thing the brain does????? but rereading shit he'd say to me and knowing now how manipulative it was sometimes helps me not feel misplaced guilt, as if it's my fault for the way he treated me. i think i have such a hard time understanding and believing my trauma because there's that disconnect between: either he's aware of the abuse and is pretending to be innocent or that's just genuinely how he is and doesn't see a problem with it and doesn't realize he's guilty of abuse, and i can't wrap my mind around either when he claims he knows me and he loves me and im his kid and he wants the best for me. whichever way it is it doesn't make any sense!!!! i just wish i could forget about it!!! when i'm feeling good i don't usually think about him. but when i feel bad it's more prominent because i get in my head about the reason i am this way is because of him. this is his fault. this is his fault. i am not at fault. i was a child. i deserved better. i am safe now. he can't hurt me anymore. it's ok to cry. it's ok.

[wench-and-jezebel]

Dark Angel Reaction: Art Attack

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)

We had spare time before this episode, so have fun with our bonus content! Link available here!

– – –

["Must be a guy thing" Ah, yes, women don't exercise]  Or a decent person thing, ya know

[OH YEAH THERE'S APPARENTLY A FAMILIAR FACE IN THIS!  @witchy-writer-lady told me abt it]

The circles that have been talked in this scene  [Ma'am calling him out on circular sentences like she doesn't do that constantly]

There is plenty more romantic.  Weddings are so overrated and expensive ☠️☠️🤣

“Why not?”  OC!

🤣🤣🤣 This woman deserves to have her dress stolen if she didn’t notice it gone from two feet away [asdfkjalfdkj you're not wrong]  She’s blind as hell with both eyes intact ☠️☠️☠️

Oh Sketch noooooo

Get ‘em OC  [No "Get 'em Normal"?]  HES SO MEANNNN ☠️☠️☠️☠️  [You do realize NoBody there does Any work right alkdsjf]  That’s true 🤣🤣  [Not even Alec, love him as I do alskdfj]  Oooooof  [He legit just sits there chatting with Normal about boxing the whole time.  Or delivering single packages]

Oh! Hello Logan!

NORMAL 🤣🤣🤣

His little “hm she’s aight” look

[This was me earlier today!!!  I understand his aversion to public speaking  aslkdfj]  ☠️☠️☠️ Moood

Oh Buddy

[His look at her alskdfj]  Their little exchange was cute tho  ['sigh' This is true]

Poor Normal  [I knowwww!  Will the hostage situations never stop?]  Right?!?

[An actual coherent monologue alkdsjfa]

Loooool I thought the brother was Palmer (Ducky’s Assistant you haven’t met yet)  [idk for sure but that's not the pertinent one… Watch for Daphne]

Poor Max done got put in her feelings

Le gasp  [Oh, last name drop!  I forgot Max's last name was on screen.  I don't think Alec's is]

Ooop! We get more jam pony

He said ten bucks  [tbf, they are in an economic depression]  True 🤣🤣

[Normal be lying abt the bip-bip-bip-ing]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Poor buddy can’t have a good family!  Oooof

Was that SPN Mary?  [Yup!]  Le gasp

Oooooof jealousy

[That was a painfully fake smile, Max]

[Also this be the plot to your Nomral fic.  But more guns.  And less love life.  And Normal's in a leather jacket and not a bathrobe]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oh boy: Logan done put his foot in his mouth

[I'm cringing in preparation for this ep btw.  Heads-up]  Oh noooo

– – –

Jezebel: Midpoint!

Wench: Bravo!  Ma'am remembered better than I… do go on!

Jezebel: Ok so first off it’s a Jam Pony ep which has proven to be some of my favorites!  And I swear I love a “I don’t like this person but I don’t hate this person so I’ll help” storyline

Wench: Poor Normal alskdjf

Jezebel: Yusss.  Alsoooo POOOR LOGANNNNNN!  BUT MAX TAKING UP FOR HIM WAS ADORABLE, IM SORRYYYY!!  But then here comes Mary-

Wench: Daphne

Jezebel: I know 🤣

Wench: Hmph

Jezebel: -and just threw a wrench right in it

Wench: And finally the jump I paused it on  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  In that dress… Just…. Wot ☠️🤣🤣☠️☠️

Wench: Apparently we have lots of photos to give y’all this time alskdfj On we go!

– – –

I swear ☠️ The dress makes the jumps look so bad ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oooof

Mood max

[Okay but he lost his job because of the messenger service so-]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Buddy she’s no angel

Bruh CAN NO ONE KEEP UP WITH SHIT  [I mean.  Technically she just.  Decided to leave with it]  FAIR

[Remember when I said I was.  preemptively cringing.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️oh shit the second hand embarrassment

[Poor Normal expecting to get killed tho]  Ooop Normal reality check on being a good person lol  [Let it be known, btw, that Normal in s2 has very good moments and very BAD moments.  I recognize this.  But for now I'm enjoying his minorly-asshole-ish-but-no-worse bits.]

This man and his bitch slaps

I love "defenstration"... it's one of my favorite words

Poooor Normal

[Have fun.  I'm.  Not watching btw.  Tell me when the speech is over plz.  I'm.  I have it muted.]  I have it turned down☠️  I’m still cringing at the faces

This.  Is Tony coming out of Logan

Max coming through again  [Okay, now you're uber-whacked; technically she only came through because she caused the problem in the first place by not handing the paper back]  Fair  [This is the one non-anti-Max comment you've made that I don't agree with]  🤣🤣🤣

[This.  Is an NCIS episode.]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️  ["I've got a military vessel heading out to-"]

A ghostttt  [Max disappearing: Cas-coded]

Oooooop-  [Plz let DaphMary be a lesbian]  SBC… If not OC GON make her one

[This whole dress thing is so ridiculously unrealistic.  It's pulling me out of the story.  She definitely smells like trash and yet no one seems to notice; she's bound to have it all dirty, stained, and ripped, and yet she's acting like she's gonna return it... just wot]

OOOOF  THAT WOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TODAY

[Showing off her powers again 'sigh']

☠️☠️☠️☠️  [She (Max) annoys me]  Fair

Oh boy

OC 🤣🤣  [Um.  DaphMary looking like she was heading over to OC as soon as she caught the bouquet.]  RIGHT

[Um.  UM.  THEY ACTUALLY DID THAT!!!  DAPHMARY I FREAKING LOVE YOU]  Oooooop!  Dean’s getting a new momma.  [Well, he always seems to lose one, so he needs two]  Oooof  ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Ooop-  Somethings missing on miss presses neck 🙂

“You first”  Heart eyes

[I.  I think we found out why she dumped him… Lickity-chicks]  ☠️☠️☠️☠️  Logan’s not clueless I love it  [This is true!]

Dawwwww!  Genuine smile!  [I will give you that Max/Logan are good in this scene]  

Another dawwwww

Le gasp

Buddy HOW BOUT YOU NOT  [HE WAS TESTING IT]  “My feet work again… Lemme break em”

– – –

Jezebel: Ok! End point! 🙃 Jam pony still are my all time favorites! Like you said it’s the Normal fic but make the girl a painting ☠️☠️ and the depression is his, you know, will to live.

Wench: lkjlkj;lkj oof

Jezebel: Also Logan was adorable in this one.  Very Tony-esque.  And his family sucks.

Wench: All true

Jezebel: But DAPHNE(MARY) 😮‍💨💕 love herrrr!

Wench: I KNOW!  I FORGOT THEY DID THAT AND JUST.  GOLD

Jezebel: OC really just be coming in and swooping up all the ladies.  Also, Max was annoying but her taking the necklace made me happy. So *sigh* 😤  I’m conflicted

Wench: This is fair!  To be honest, she’s not as bad in s1 as she is in s2.  It’s her dynamic there that causes the issue.

Jezebel: Ending note. Catlike jumping in leather = meh, goofy but believable / catlike jumping in fancy schmancy dress = the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen

[ikonist]

300 days without hanbin moodboard

[sips-tea-cutely]

SO I'VE ACTYALLY NEVER MADE A GENSHIN REQUEST BUT WHY NOT, IF MOD IBUKI'S ASKING

Can I request Venti comforting a depressed reader? Maybe a reader going through bullying based on their appearance (chubbiness in my case)

Thank you in advance!!

Venti comforting a bullied!reader

a/n: YES YES YES OKAY OKAY I GOT THIS!! also i apologize if these are inaccurate or are harmful/hurtful towards other people. and if you feel insecure or is actually getting bullied, try not hesitate to reach out to people about this problem. -ibuki

cw: mentions of ed

a/n 2: ugh she never finished it smh!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬 cant trust these hoes anymore looking for a new wife…. -maki

walking down the steps towards your house, today was such a good day— maybe he could really pay master diluc for a bottle of dandelion wine this time!~ "haaah, today had quite the audience!! hmm ehehe i cant wait to see my blume-"

"--really think that sweet innocent bard would want someone like you?"

venti stopped in his tracks and directed his attention towards the hostile voice. he hid somehwere nearby in order to see who was the victim because, being venti, he was obviously going to help, until— he saw a familiar lock of hair out the corner of his eye.

his eyes shot open once he realized,

you were the victim.

"honestly i bet the bard just wants you for your voice. theres no way he would want you for your... appearance. plus! you dont even sound that good so really, you’d be nothing but a nuisance to him."

his blume was getting harassed by "some self-obsessed bitch", the new nickname given to your harasser.

he was furious, FURIOUS. the winds matching his mood, it started swaying with an unforgiving speed. but he had to calm down since he knew you’d know it was him causing the wind, thus would give away his hiding spot.

for about 30 minutes or so, he had to watch his beloved get bashed and slandered, every minute making it harder not for him to go straight to the two of you and feed the narcissist to dvalin. god, her voice was so high-pitched, it’s almost like she’s doing it on purpose.

to restrain his anger, venti went straight home midway and set up a lamplit dinner with his specialty, a barbatos ratatouille!!

while waiting for you, he had been left alone with his thoughts, the thoughts of a lackluster god

he should have known. this was the reason all along, she was the reason.

the reason behind your paranoia of calories and carbs, the times you’d often go without any food until dinner, your obsession with weight-loss drugs, and frequent outings to take jogs.

he knew that wasn't who you really were, no out of everything, you were confident in yourself, body positive and not taking shit from anyone. so, why?

why didnt he do anything?

it was the reason, the reason behind your small smiles, barely audible giggles, and refusal of doing any music gigs with him.

he should have known.

because you always had the biggest smile and always, always loved to sing with him.

he—

click!

the door opened for him to see you at the doorway announcing your arrival.

"AH! MY BLUME! how was your day?" he ran up to you like a golden retriever reunited with its’ owner.

you smiled softly.

‘theres that smile again. that fake, fake smile.’ he thought.

"hello venti. you made dinner tonight?” you gasp at the beautiful ratatouille. “im surprised the house isnt on fire yet." you giggle softly.

"well, i had a feeling that i should make some food tonight!! my audience sure loved todays performance and my happiness is still trying to wear off. i might become too prideful, hehe~"

he pulled your chair back for you to sit, like a gentleman would. you kindly took the gesture and sat down as he pushed the chair back forward, and went to his own seat.

2 minutes in, he broke the silence.

"how was your day today?"

you smiled.

"today was splendid. i got to go out of mondstadt for a walk and enjoy nature. enjoy life while it lasts, you know?"

ah.

life while it lasts.

he was immortal, you werent, he remembered.

his lips slightly curved upwards.

"i get it, did you meet anyone along the way?"

he wanted the truth out of you, even if he had to be sneaky about it.

“oh yes! i managed to come across flora and have a little chat with her about her flowers, my, she’s quite an entrepreneur for a little girl!” your lips curve at the memory of your conversation with the young florist.

venti was pissed. at what? it could be anything at this point; at you for not telling him you needed help, at himself for not figuring it out sooner, at her for causing you so much grief.

“i know you’re being bullied.” he said. he sounded so bold and confident it was almost out of character for him to act like this. did you really matter that much to him?

“i get if you don’t want me to get involved, i guess… but at least, please tell captain kaeya about this. personally, blume, i think you’re beautiful the way you are. ill support you if you really do want to change something about your appearance but please don’t do it because you don’t fit some sort of beauty standard. isn’t monstadt all about your freedom, dear?”

your hands were shaking and your eyes looked everywhere, anywhere for a distraction. “i- well…it’s true i don’t want you to get involved cause only celestia know what you’ll do to her but… yeah, ill tell kaeya about it tomorrow but for now…” you say before grabbing his delicate palm, the heat of the lamp shining brightly.

“i want to spend time with my favorite bard.”

that smile. it’s not fake anymore, your blushed cheeks are scrunched up from joy. finally, you understand what he has always meant.

no matter what will happen, he’ll always be there to comfort you, until death will do part.

[heaveaux]

This is so shit sorry

Im writing this fanfiction because I’m struggling with my mental health problems really bad at the moment and need a sense of comfort. I’m sorry my writing skills are crap too, but I’m still learning 👍

Gerard Way x gn!reader

Big TW

Warnings: sh, suicide, depression, swearing, arguments, bullying, fighting, blood, smoking, alcohol, throwing up

Summary- Gerard and y/n meet at school, y/n fights with people a lot and seems strong, well, they are physically but they’re going through a really hard time with bullies as well. It doesn’t end well is all I can say

They/them

Bullies- Elijah, Renata, and Royal

School was crap. School is crap, and it always has been. But there were some new students coming in, so that was exciting. I walked over to my locker. There was a large crowd around it, what could be going on over here.

I barged through the people and saw it. My locker was being vandalised. By. Fucking. Royal. I pinned him to the locker and punched him hard in the nose a few times until Elijah dragged me back. He was strong and tall, he easily pushed me down onto the disgusting hallway floor. He got down too and started to punch me, but I got up and kicked him shin. He grabbed my neck harshly as I dug my sharp nails into his shoulder. He let go and I fell down, trying to catch my breath. 

‘Don’t you dare try and fight me, you’re weak, you know you are’ he kicked me as Renata walked up and punched me in the face. Hard. She may look weak, but she had a fucking strong punch. I was covered in bruises and both my nostrils were bleeding. It stung bad, but it was fine, it wouldn’t last forever. 

The crowd left, but there was one boy still standing there, he had dark brown hair and slightly chubby cheeks. He was around 5’4, a bit shorter than me, admittedly he was one of the cutest boys I had ever seen. I felt my face heat up a little as then the bell went and the boy left.

I wasn’t going to bother cleaning up my face, even though I probably looked horrible, but that meant less people would approach me so that was fine with me.

I looked at my locker, it had cruel words spread across it. I felt a few tears roll down my cheeks as I wiped them away, feeling some blood get smeared across my cheeks. I shoved my bag and jacket into the locker and aggressively slammed it shut.

I had art now, I got to sit in a row all by myself, I got some peace while I painted. But when I walked in, that cut boy was sitting in the seat next to mine.

‘Ah, I see you’ve decided to show up today y/n, you’re 7 minutes late, after school detention.’ My teacher said, only looking up for half a second, not noticing my bloody face. 

I sighed and sat in my seat with my head on the desk, I could hear people whispering about me, it was more than normal and they were throwing things at me too. I stood up abruptly and ran outside the classroom and into the bathroom. 

I locked myself in a stall and cried. I got my box cutter out of my pocket which luckily had a zip. I pulled up my sleeves and stared at the white lines scattered across my arms. I added some more. Blood dripped onto the floor. And more. It was becoming more sore. And more. And m…. 

I woke up to the sound of the bell. I looked at my watch. It was time to go home. I cleaned up the floor and left for detention.

I walked into the room and the teacher in there took me outside. ‘Y/n are you okay, I heard that you ran away from class this morning and didn’t attend any lessons. Is something going on, are you okay?’ Mr Cuomo (I’m not creative, just take this name 😭 yes he is from weezer stfu 💕). I couldn’t stop thinking about what I did earlier and I hugged him, crying, he was my favourite teacher. He was so nice. He let me go home, but only this once would he let me off he said.

I got home, I could see the blood stains on my sleeves, I should’ve cleaned them. Suddenly, my mum walked in. ‘We’ve got new neighbours, go give them these cookies I made’ I took the cookies and nodded, putting them on my bed. I put on a black turtle neck, with a slipknot T-shirt and some slightly baggy black jeans. I was going to go out anyway to buy some bandages, guess I could wait an extra few minutes delivering these.

I got to the door and knocked, I knew this was the house since it still had the for sale sign still up. A boy with straight brown hair opened the door and I saw the boy for earlier’s head peak around from the sofa. I handed the boy the cookies and he smiled and took them. ‘Thank you; I saw you at school, getting beat up that person, are you alright now? Also I’m Mikey and that’s my brother Gerard’ I shook his hand.

‘Yeah I’m fine, also my name is y/n’ I replied. ‘Wait you’ve got some blood under your nose, come in I’ll clean it for you’ he was nice. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into their bathroom, Gerard following behind. Gerard hugged me and then ran away. What was that? It was cute, but why?

Gerard pov-

I was worried about y/n, after they ran out of class and I saw them crying outside of detention. I had the idea to give them a hug. They probably needed it. I hugged them and then ran away, I thought they were attractive and I really like them. I’d never say that, because they’d probably beat me up or something. I led down on my bed, kicking my legs while lying face down, like a teenage girl who had just had their crush text them back.

Y/n pov-

Mikey cleaned my face and soon after, I left to go to the shop. I bought some bandages and plasters just in case I maybe got into a fight again.

Time skip (because this is getting boring)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I sat down with my friends Frank and Ray outside, behind the building. Soon after, Mikey and Gerard came over and sat with us, Frank was on one side of me, Gerard was on the other side and Ray and Mikey were on the other side. They began talking, but I zoned out. I was thinking about what would happen if I did something really bad to myself. What would everyone think. What if I lived?

Frank nudged me. ‘You alright?’ I nodded and took another drag of my cigarette. ‘Just thinking’ he continued talking to Mikey and Ray as Gerard put his head on my shoulder. I felt my face heat up as I pulled him closer. We’d only known each other for a month now, but I think I like him. A lot.

The bell went and we walked inside, one last lesson and we could finally go home and have the little party we’d planned to celebrate my pet fish’s birthday. It was really just an excuse for us to party and get wasted.

After school I walked outside, I saw Renata, Royal and Elijah. They walked over to me. Royal pushed me onto the floor. Then Renata grabbed my hair and I bit my lip, she pulled my head up from the ground and then slamming back down repeatedly and soon my lip was bleeding and so was my nose. Ouch. I was crying, but then Ray ran over, scaring them away. My face was covered in bruises and blood.

I slowly curled up into a ball and cried. My nose was bleeding and my ears were ringing, it was so painful. Ray pulled me onto his lap. ‘Shhhh, it’s okay, they’re gone now, I’ve got you’ he pulled me up to his chest and hugged me tightly. He picked me up and carried me to his car where the others were and we all got in.

‘Hey y/n are you alright?’ Gerard was playing with my hair and I cried into his chest now. I was sat on his lap, cuddling him. I shook my head. ‘I’m sorry….’

We got to my house and we walked in. I grabbed the vodka and shot glasses. Ray got some weaker alcohol and Frank brought in some whiskey. We all sat in a circle drinking, Gerard was in my lap now. I ended up throwing up and sleeping next to the toilet I got Gerard’s arms. The only thing I could remember was making out with Gerard, taking off my shirt and then throwing up and laughing. 

Only me and Frank were awake. He took me out to my garden, it was very early, the sun was still rising but it was quite warm. We sat on the grass by the pool. ‘Y/n, I saw your arms yesterday, I need you to tell me the truth, are you okay?’ I didn’t cry, I just sat there with a sad expression on my face. ‘No, I’m not, I’m not okay’ I led down onto my back, but then felt puke rising up my throat and ran to the downstairs bathroom. 

I felt horrible, sick, achy and tired. I just brought a bin to the sofa and led down, looking outside through the large windows and clear doors at the pool. Frank was inside now, getting us all some medicine and water. Ray was asleep next to Mikey on the floor. They were a few centimetres apart, Mikey then sat up and started tickling Ray’s feet. I laughed, and then Ray woke up and Gerard came downstairs.

Luckily it was a Saturday so we could stay in all day. My parents were still at work. They worked night shifts and slept during the day. I spent most of my time alone on the weekends or doing grocery shopping for my parents. It was fine with me, it was peaceful, I didn’t care that I was alone most of the time.

Gerard came over to me and sat next to me. Frank gave me a sympathetic look, a pill and a glass of water. To help with the hangover. He also gave the things to Ray, himself, Mikey and Gerard.

We sat there in silence for a few minutes until I turned on a Christmas movie. It wasn’t that near to Christmas, I just wanted to brighten the mood. We all laughed a bit and spoke to each other. But we were all too tired to do anything. ‘Hey Gee, you know you’re making music n shit, you should make a song one day, called like, cemetery something. Dedicated to me, your no.1 fan’ he laughed. ‘Okay sure, I’ll write it at some point’

Time skip brought to you by more boringness 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I walked into school, once again having a cross around my locker. It had things like ‘kys’ written on it. I ran into the bathroom and took out my pills. I took a bunch and left for class. I felt dizzy, I felt hot, like I was going to throw up.

‘You’re late again y/n, after school d-‘ I passed out.

I woke up in hospital. I heard crying and shouting. ‘LET ME IN THERE…. please, please’ I heard Gerard sobbing. ‘Please, I want to see them’ even Ray and Frank were crying. 

I was in a room with a nurse. I had a weird big T-shirt thing on. My ears were ringing. I threw up on my bed. There was blood in it. The nurse left to get me a new blanket and something to throw up in. I was squinting, it was too bright, I could feel vomit around my mouth. I saw Gerard outside crying. 

I regretted doing it. But I also wanted to do it again, but not live.

A doctor walked in. ‘I want to see Gerard, please..’ the doctor brought Gerard in. Gerard was still crying. 

‘I was so worried y/n’ I started crying too ‘I’m so so sorry Gerard’

Time skip bc yeah

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was let out of the hospital. I went into my house and shut myself in my room. I took some pills. I-

Gerard’s pov-

The funeral was quiet. I didn’t want them to leave, I never got to tell them how much I loved them, I’ll remember to write that song for them one day….

Time skip to a mcr concert in the future 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘I wrote this song for someone I fell in love with’ I yelled out to the large crowd ‘they were called y/n and they asked me to write a song dedicated to them, this is cemetery drive’

Skip a little

~~~~~~~~~

‘I MISS YOU I MISS YOU SO FAR, AND THE COLLISION OF YOUR KISS THAT MADE IT SO HARD’ I was singing at the top of my lungs…. For y/n.

Y/n pov-

I looked down at him from heaven… thank you….

[cyborg-franky]

Hi Franky! Could I ask for an emergency request?

Could i request something for Zoro or Mihawk or both if you do both? if not just surprise me, with a gn reader

Im not doing too good today, my family (my own mom and grandma actually) still treats me like im a kid and it doesn’t do well with my mental health, i’ve been having a hard time getting out of bed because of my depression. My family also tends to call me lazy and my own grandmother has told my mom to kick me out despite the fact that i do pay rent with the very limited amount of money i get, they also tend to bully me about my weight and they aren’t the most supportive about me being non-binary, so im having a hard time being my true self.

Ah i’m sorry if this is too much, i’ve never asked for an emergency request before

I am sorry this got so lost in the mix my love <3 I've been having 'a day' all week.

I've talked to you about this one on one you know I am here for you chick.

Zoro x GN Reader SFW Modern AU Word Count: 254

You’d shown up at his door late at night, he didn’t mind, he barely blinked as he let you into his apartment. Luffy was out at his brothers tonight anyway. He sat on the couch, jerking his chin to gesture for you to join him. You dropped your bag and slid off your shoes.

Flopping next to the green haired man you cuddled up to his side, your eyes looked tired, you’d been crying the entire way here, Zoro knew you’d tried your best to stop before getting here. He wrapped an arm around you, pulling you close.

“Same shit again?”

A nod

He clicked his tongue and leaned over to grab his beer, taking a swig, contemplating everything. Zoro knew what your home life was like, you always came here to escape being judged and bullied, picked on for having problems, picked on for who you were.

“Need a nap?” He offered, you felt his rough fingertips rubbing your arm, trying to comfort you with the gesture.

“I do, I’m sorry I’m so lazy”

Zoro shook his head, he wasn’t going to have that here, you being made to feel like that had always pissed him off, he wanted to give your family a scare, he only didn’t out of respect for you. “You’re not lazy, your depressed, they’re just dumbasses” He grunted and held you even closer, so your head was on his chest.

You mumbled a thanks before allowing yourself to fall asleep, feeling better, safter and happier with your partner.

Tag list:

@chocolate-n-cheese @rivvd-art @angeltani @mimi-ya @undercoverweeeb @slut4animedilfs @acesmarigold @gaynchor @sanjithesimp

[cuttinqlines]

IN THE MIDNIGHT HOUR II

                             IN THE MIDNIGHT HOUR II

(richard ramirez [ahs 1984] x reader | mainly implied xavier plympton x reader)

trigger warning; drug use, toxic relationships, mentions of abuse, toxic characters, xavier is portrayed as a major piece of shit for the first few installments, glorification of a serial killer, knives, etc.

disclaimer: i do not support the real richard ramirez in any way, shape, or form. this is simply based on the fictional version from ahs 1984. no disrespect is intended in any way. please, feel free to click off of the fic if you don’t enjoy this type of content. any hate will be ignored.

word count: 2,467

a/n: sorry this took so long. im a depressed piece of shit lmao. 

taglist: @kuollut-talven @felicityofbakerstreet @bitchcraft1398 

previous | next

IT HAD ONLY been a few days since your run-in with the self-proclaimed ‘Night Stalker’ yet it felt like years had passed. The memory of the event was constantly running through your mind, seeming to occupy your every thought. It was as if your mind was filled only with visions of dark hair and piercing dark eyes. It had gotten to the point where it was consuming you, distracting you from anything that wasn’t the thought of him. It was impossible to focus. You weren’t exactly sure that you wanted to. The part of you that desperately longed for the dark stranger to reappear and tear you away from your dilapidating life was overtaking you. You had almost wished that you would have given in to his demands that night. Almost. Something had been holding you back that night and something- someone- was still holding you back, tethering you to the place you had grown to despise.

Letting out a sigh, you stared at yourself in front of the bathroom mirror, attempting to shake away the thoughts that continuously plagued you. The ghost of a bruise still showed underneath your eye, barely noticeable with the makeup that you had delicately applied over it. You looked better than you had in the days before, but you still weren’t keen on leaving the confines of the four walls of your bedroom, let alone your apartment. You hadn’t left the house since that night. You were sure everyone thought that you were spiraling- He had probably twisted the story into that narrative. You turned away from the mirror, leaning against the base of the sink. It was time to face the situation at hand. You could already feel the silent judgment of Montana. She had told you so.  “Fuck.”

It shouldn’t have mattered that much to you- what everyone thought. It’s not like they had too much room to judge. They were your friends, sort of, but they didn’t rule you. They weren’t the end all be all. Still, you couldn’t help but feel nervous at the thought of facing them. It had been days of voicemails, knocks on the door, and missed phone calls. You had gone ghost. They wouldn’t have expected anything else, though. It wasn’t unlike you to disappear. You were used to disappointing everyone. 

After a few more minutes of anxiety and deliberation, you laid out a pretty white line, snorted it down, and got ready to head out the door. At the very least, you could show up to aerobics and casually run into everyone. By the time you got there, you were sure you could figure out how to gloss over all of the problems that kept on appearing. 

****

The Aerobics studio hadn’t changed much in your week of absence. The faces of the instructors were still plastered on the walls, yours still included much to your surprise. The chairs strategically placed throughout the lobby were occupied by young adults, laughing at something one of them had said. The ambiance was peaceful and you suddenly wished that you would have shown up for work in the last week. The thought quickly diminished as you thought back to the bruise that had been occupying your face. There was no way you would have shown up with that. You wouldn’t have given him the satisfaction. Stepping up to the front desk, you leaned against the counter lazily. 

“Hi. Do you have any classes with vacant spaces open for today, Janice?” You asked the receptionist a bit awkwardly, looking at the wall behind her as you spoke.

The woman looked up, purposefully making direct eye contact. She looked you up and down, judgement written all over her face.  “Yes. The instructor position for the class you teach at 6:30, (Y/N). If you want to keep your job, I suggest you get prepared for it and go teach it.” 

You couldn’t help but cringe at her tone. The attitude dripped off of it like poison. Truth be told, you had thought that you had already been fired. That is generally what happens after you drop off of the face of the planet for a week. “Right- I’ll just go ahead and get set up to start, then. Thank you.”

“You’re lucky that you showed up today. You’re really pushing it with your delinquent behavior. Shape up or ship out, sweetheart. This is the last time you’re getting exceptions. You’re really lucky that Montana covered your classes for the week. Now, get moving. It’s 6:20. Studio 3.”

Janice hardly gave you time to react, as she stood up and began to push you towards the direction of the studio. Her cold touch caused an unpleasant shiver to shoot through your spine. Your mind instantly drifted to your unwelcome house guest, though the shiver he gave you was not exactly unpleasant- You mentally scolded yourself for obsessing over the ‘Night Stalker’, before practically bursting into the studio. 

It felt as if a million eyes landed on you from the moment you opened the door. The never-ending stares seemed to burn holes into your skin. One pair of eyes, in particular, seemed to stare the deepest. Xavier. You flickered your gaze to meet his, the other people in the room disappearing into a sort of tunnel that consumed the sides of your vision. Your heart caught in your chest. You wanted to tear your eyes away, but there was something stopping you. Something about Xavier always seemed to hold you back. His gaze was pleading, an apology seeming to spill out of it. 

 “(Y/N)! I thought you were going to be out for a while! Xavier said that you were like super sick or something.” Montana’s voice rang out, casually. “So happy you’re here though. Teaching this class has been such a drag.”

At the sound of the young woman’s voice, your head instinctively jerked towards it. You plastered a pained smile onto your face. “Yeah- thanks for covering for me, Montana. I seriously owe you one. Being sick was a major drag. Probably worse than teaching this class of Cyndi Lauper obsessed boys.” 

The blonde let out a laugh. “Well, since you’re back, I’ll let you take this one. And maybe take your man out when you’re done. He’s been such a buzzkill lately.” 

Montana gave you a wink, patting your shoulder affectionately. With a final wave to you and Xavier, she slipped out the door and disappeared down the hall with a flash of blonde hair. Not wanting to waste any more time, or give Xavier the chance to talk to you, you flicked the boom box on and let the sound of Billy Idol’s voice fill the room. 

****

The entirety of the class went by uneventfully. Billy Idol’s soothing tone seemed to temporarily soother your anxiety, making it easier for you to ignore the pained glances that were becoming more and more inescapable. You left the music on as the class drew to a close, turning the volume down to a soft, but audible hum. You didn’t bother to look as everyone made their way to the door. Instead, you moved towards the front of the room, letting yourself face the large windows that looked out towards the city. 

You watched as people leaving the last few classes of the evening walked down the sidewalk, off into the night. Some faces were familiar, regulars that always seemed to be in aerobics class. Other faces, unfamiliar and new. They all seemed so happy, as if their lives were perfect. You wished that you could get a taste of that feeling. You continued to admire the citizens of Los Angeles, lost in your thoughts. Then, in a sudden flash, there was a single face that stuck out in the crowd. Unmistakable dark hair and piercing eyes that could have belonged only to the face that you could never forget. You locked eyes with the man, causing a sinister smile to appear on his face. He moved closer to the building. Your heart skipped a beat. He was headed towards the door. Your eyes were still locked with his, nothing could-

“(Y/N)... Can we talk about what happened the other night? Please… I didn’t mean for it to go so far.” Xavier’s voice hit your ears, soft and pleading. 

You broke away from the ‘Night Stalker’s’ gaze, slowly turning to face the man that you had once felt so strongly for. You leaned against the windows behind you, pressing your nearly bare back against the cool glass. Xavier took a few steps closer, leaving only a few inches between your faces. You couldn’t help but flinch as he reached out to tenderly touch your face. Hurt flashed across his face briefly, but his hand still gently came into contact with your soft skin. You let your eyes flutter closed and sucked in a sharp breath. “I- I can’t do this,” you whispered, hot tears pricking in the inner corner of your eyes. So many different emotions were running through your body. The urge to run away from him had never been so heightened. 

He grazed his thumb gingerly across your jawline, his voice dropping to a whisper. “I’m so sorry, Please. I just wanted it so badly and I thought that was the only way. And I didn’t want anyone to find out. The way you looked at me when you did- I lost it. I thought you would tell everyone. I thought you would leave me. I’m so sorry.” 

You had yet to respond to him when a cutting voice interrupted the scene unfolding before you. “Well, well, well. What do we have here?” The deep voice questioned, sinister laughter etched into his tone. 

“N-?” You began, eyes flickering open. You met the dark haired man’s eyes, looking directly past Xavier. He was already staring at you intensely, the usual smirk plastered on his face. 

“Richard.” He corrected, moving his eyes from you to the other man in your company. Xavier had moved away from you by this point, looking at Richard with a suspicious glare. Richard simply continued to smirk at him, looking more and more devilish as time passed. “My little angel, didn’t expect to see you so soon. What a pleasant surprise.”

“Okay. Who the fuck are you?” Xavier demanded, his hand wrapping around your forearm in a protective manner. You instinctively recoiled to his touch. You shifted your weight from one foot to another, watching as the two began to go back and forth. 

“I’m the devil’s favorite prodigy. It’s more like ‘who the fuck are you?’” The other man taunted. His eyes locked on the contact point of yours and Xavier’s skin. An unreadable emotion flashed across his face, but was quickly replaced with his usual infuriating smirk. “I’ve decided I’m here to collect her. Truth be told, it wasn’t originally in my master and I’s plan, but it seems like I stumbled in at the perfect time, with you harassing my girl.”

“Your-? (Y/N), are you fucking this guy? We get into one fight and you’re off giving it out to this creep?” The blonde questioned, his tone demanding and incredulous. His voice rose with every word that he spoke. He was red in the face by this point. You could tell by the clench in his jaw and the way his hand tightened around you that he was angry. The smug expression of Richard definitely wasn’t helping his reaction either.

You tried to ignore the fear that had begun to creep into the back of your mind, your mind flashing back to his closed fist accidentally ramming into your face. You looked up at him with your tear stained face. Words were failing you. You didn’t exactly want to say that Richard had broken into your house, pinned you against a wall, and sparked something inside of you that made you feel so many fucked up things. Was it really more fucked up than what you felt about Xavier after everything that he had done? You weren’t so sure any more. Xavier seemed to take your silence and lack of denial as a ‘yes’ to his questions. Disgust took over his face, his hand tossing your arm away as if it had suddenly turned into some sort of cursed object. 

He scoffed at you, shoving you away from his body. “I can’t believe you would do this to me. Maybe you deserved that.” He spat out venomously, angrily gesturing to the hardly hidden  bruise underneath your eye. 

You flinched as his hand raised. Something seemed to click into place for the dark haired man as he watched the two of you, your reaction triggering the darkest part of him. You hardly had time to react further, before Richard was in front of you. His left arm pressed back against your body, gently shoving you behind him. His right hand was adorned with his blade, ready to slash at the man before him. “You did that to her? For your sake, I hope you say no. I’d hate to have to kill you right here. It would really throw a wrench into the master’s plans and we both hate that.”

Your hand reached out slowly, tugging on the edge of this sleeve, beckoning his eyes to meet your eyes. He complied, looking over his shoulder quickly. You shook your head at him, a silent plea for him to drop it. He was already acting psychotic enough to have the police called on him and you were sure that would be the last thing that he wanted. He looked back to Xavier, who was staring at him incredulously. “Get the fuck out of here or die,” The dark haired man spat out.

Xavier gave you a pointed look, before shoving past the both of you and storming out of the studio. You knew he would show up at your apartment later, demanding explanations for the psychotic interaction that just went down. You would figure out a way to avoid that later. For now, your full attention was on Richard. He turned towards you, dark eyes studying the every feature on your face. His hand hovered over the side of your neck, before gently pushing your hair to the side. His fingers softly trailed down the side of your throat, traveling down your chest. Like a phantom, they grazed the length of your body, sending a shiver down your spine. Your heart skipped a beat in your chest. You softly bit down on your bottom lip, eyes staring straight into his. “You’re mine now, little angel. I’ll kill for you. I’ll die for you. But you have to be mine forever- That’s the catch. Will you sell your soul to the devil?”

“I will.”

[miraeluc]

you’re suffering alone

prompt: “kageyama knows you as his little ray of sunshine, but what does he do when he finds out how you really feel?”

pairing: kageyama x female! reader 

word count: 3k

warnings: MAJOR tw!!! depression, again major tw self harm, reader cries a lot when kageyama finds out, reader’s mom is dead lol i went all out 

genre: fluff, angst

you were always their little ray of sunshine

when you first joined the school a year ago and introduced yourself all excitedly

hinata ran to tanaka after that class

“we need to convince her to be our manager!!!!”

tanaka was down lol

it didn’t take long to convince you, you were looking for extracurricular activities to engage in anyway 

the conversation went a bit like this

“y/n-san! do you want to be karasuno’s volleyball team manager?”

“sure!”

“we swear it- did you just say yes?”

“...yes”

cue tanaka and hinata screaming 

after you became their manager it didn’t take you and kageyama too long to fall in love either 

he adored the good vibes you brought with in any room you stepped in and you enjoyed the calmness that came with him (except when hinata’s around to annoy him, pretty boy radiates ᵃⁿᵍʸ energy then lol)

poor boy didn’t know that what he felt towards you until he had the whole team screaming at him to ask you out 

so he did 

and so you ended up here, 10 months into dating kageyama and 12 months into being karasuno’s manager along with kiyoko and hitoka 

everyone found it a little weird that you were always the one to stay the longest out of everyone, but everyone assumed it was just because you genuinely enjoyed being there

which you did, don’t get me wrong

that just wasn’t the only reason.

no one actually knew why you had changed schools in the middle of the year

every time someone asked you pushed it off, claiming your old school just wasn’t working out and started babbling about how much you love being at this school and how glad you are to have found real friends like them

“time for a break, i brought food!!”

you held the bags of food up, getting tackled in a gross sweaty hug by nishinoya 

“it’s like you heard my stomach calling out for you, y/n!!! you’re my saviour!!!”

you immediately laughed 

“i know, noya, now get off, you’re sweaty” you cringed a little and he got off, a little offended but he quickly forgot about it and snatched the bags 

you were all sat on the ground, everyone eating quietly when hinata started complaining about his mother nagging him to focus a little more on studying 

that’s how everyone started talking about their mothers, somehow everyone having a little to complain about 

“what ‘bout you, y/n? you have nothing to remark about your mom like our little crybabies here?” daichi looked at you

everyone whined at that,, “we’re not babies!!”

you tensed up at the question before relaxing and smiling 

“nope! my mom is perfect.” you giggled

“woah, i wish!! you need to introduce me to your mom, y/n!!” 

noya was very invested in your mom being perfect, lol

you see

kageyama here is very observant, whether it be on the court or just, well, people in general

he saw you tense up for that split-second, not pressing it further 

he knows you most likely aren’t ready to talk about it 

now that he thinks about it, you never talk about your family

he’d love to know but he understands that you’ll come to him when you’re ready to tell him and he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable by nagging you about it

“i’ll introduce you to her, noya” you giggled

his face lit up and he nodded before the topic changed again and you could now also speak to them about how annoying and hard math class is

fr tho i hate math 

after they were done eating no one could move anymore, let alone practice

hinata tried

keyword tried 

he threw up....

no one else even wanted to practice after that - opting to clean up and end practice for today instead

“kageyama, ill head out a bit early today, i’ve got some stuff to do” you said

you startled the shit out of him because he was just bringing the last volleyball to the cart

“HO- oh.” he stopped himself from screaming and turned to you 

“alright, just take care..” he mumbled, ruffling your hair which made you whine and fix it 

you hate when he does that 

he thinks your reaction is adorable

you scoffed and pulled him down to your height to plant a little kiss on his cheek 

he blushed, pda isnt for him

you loved his soft side so much 

nonetheless he smiled at you and straightened up again 

“call me if anything happens” he cleared his throat 

baby was a little awkward with stuff like this 

you didn’t mind though

you nodded and smiled “will do!”

and off you were lol 

hinata then popped up infront of kageyama 

“what’d you do to her!?!?!?! she never leaves early!!!!!!!”

kageyama pushed him away by the head 

“she just has stuff to do, shut up.”

“hey, mom..” you smiled lightly as you sat down 

“nishinoya is really looking forward to meeting you! the whole team asked about you today.. today was an ok day, i was pretty distracted all day so i didn’t have the time to feel sad again.”

...

you sighed

“but, you know, it’s been getting harder lately. it seems that getting out of bed to get to school is getting harder.. i love making everyone happy, but it’s hard being the provider and never getting something in return. sometimes, when things get hard, i just want to drop everything. i want to stop acting so bubbly and happy, but i know you wouldn’t want me to lose my smile.”

you stood up 

“i’ll get going then, i love you.”

you placed the flowers down on the grave before you, staring down at it with a sad smile before making your way home, yet again 

the next day you showed up to school as you usually did, taking your seat next to kageyama after greeting him like usual 

you were having a conversation with hinata

it was too early for kageyama to speak 

everyone was confused when you didn’t show up to practice that day

kags(｡◝‿◜｡) , 2:47pm: are you not coming to practice?

y/n, 2:49pm: no baby, i’m sorry :( i really can’t tODAY, im so upset over it 

kags(｡◝‿◜｡), 2:50pm: did something happen?

kags(｡◝‿◜｡), 2:53pm: y/n?

y/n, 3.26pm: nope, i just have some stuff to do at home  (╥﹏╥)

the next day you showed up like usual again, this time attending practice too

just like that the days seemed to go by in a blur for you 

day by day you felt yourself breaking more 

day by day the scars on your hips multiplied 

and day by day it got a little harder to make the room light up when you stepped inside 

it was after practice and it was only you, nishinoya and kageyama left 

“hey, y/n, can i finally meet your mom today??”

he was pressing around so much about it 

you smiled and shrugged,

“sure, i bet she doesn’t mind a visit”

“can i come too?” kageyama asked timidly and you nodded 

“of course.. it’s about time.” you smiled 

your eyes were a little glassy 

he frowned

nishinoya was too busy getting excited over meeting the first ever perfect mother to notice and he began dragging you out “let’s go then!”

he was pulling you to the direction of your place before you abruptly stopped

“ah-ah, i didn’t say i still live with her, did I?”

you had both boys confused now and you started walking into the right direction

you intertwined your fingers with kageyama’s

he squeezed your hand a little 

he knew you needed a little support 

only did he not expect you to lead them to the cemetery

nishinoya’s smile dropped when you actually entered the cemetery 

he saw it but he expected you to walk past 

you stopped in front of your mothers grave 

“there she is.” you let out a sigh 

kageyama felt his heart drop 

“wait, y/n, i’m so sorry for pressing this so mu-”

kageyama pulled you in a tight hug, shaking his head at the boy, who now went quiet 

he felt so horrible

you were trying so hard to hold your tears back, looking at noya

“don’t worry, you didn’t know.” 

you still smiled at him 

kageyama then spoke 

“it’s best if you go home, don’t you think?”

he didn’t even sound angry at this point 

nishinoya nodded and left 

he really felt so bad 

you couldn’t hold back and broke out in tears after

this was the first time you cried in front of your boyfriend 

he didn’t expect it to hurt this much 

hearing your little sobs break through you 

he could feel his own heart breaking as he tightened the hug 

neither of you said anything

he just let you cry into his chest 

he didn’t need to tell you he was there for you with words

he told you through gently patting your back as you cried

he told you through not judging you when you cried like this 

even when it started raining and the rain was slowly seeping through both of your clothes he didnt loosen his grip on you 

he let you finish crying 

however long it took 

and when you finally looked up at him, only the moon’s light illuminating your face, he felt his heart break, again, at the sight of your puffy eyes and red nose

he wanted to protect you from all bad things, forever.

“gosh, i’m sorry, it took me so long to stop crying..” 

he shook his head and pecked your forehead quickly “no. you didn’t.”

“..is this why you always avoided talking about your mother?”

you nodded, looking down at her grave, the flowers you placed there two days ago already droopy

you then looked up at him again 

“thank you, for.. supporting me..”

nishinoya apologised about 27 times when he saw you 

you kept reassuring him that it was alright but he felt so bad 

he felt so bad he couldn’t even properly play that day 

daichi sent him home early

“come back when you dont have two left legs!!!”

practice ended soon after that anyway 

you sat on a bench, filling out the last bits of your homework so you didnt have to do it at home, not even noticing that it was just you and kageyama left until he called out to you 

“hey, y/n, mind throwing me some balls? i’m not tired yet and i want to keep practicing”

you happily helped

you admired his determination to get better daily

it was refreshing, seeing him so passionate about volleyball 

how couldn’t you help when he asked like that

that’s how he was now practicing as you were talking 

“can you come over tonight?”

you furrowed your brows

“but it’s a school night?”

he shrugged “i don’t care. you haven’t been at my place for three entire weeks! i only see you at school, i miss you.” he was honest

he really missed you and he wanted to know what was up with your lame excuses every time he asked 

you then nodded 

“alright then, i’ll come.”

whilst he was busy drinking water you tried ‘passing’ the ball (at which you horribly failed)

“look, i’m a better setter than you!”

he chased you down lol 

you took him by surprise when he finally caught you, grabbing onto your hips, followed by a loud intake of breath and a wince from you

fuck

well

he obviously immediately let go

“y/n. what’s wrong?”

you sighed and turned towards him

“um.. i.. hit my hip earlier today..?” you trailed off and he immediately knew that you were lying 

honestly, he kind of had an idea of what it was 

he just didn’t want to think of that possibility

he might be a bit slow, but he’s not stupid 

he has a slight idea why you haven’t been coming over

he notices how the circles under your eyes have gotten darker 

he notices how you sleep in classes, which is something you never do 

and he’s so, so worried 

but he’s scared to approach you 

he’s scared to confirm his worst fears 

he shook his head at you “don’t lie.”

you sighed softly “kageyama, it’s nothing.”

you avoided his gaze and he shook his head again, now unable to hold back from speaking 

“no, y/n. you’re not okay, i know you’re not. i know that you struggle every day and i know you don’t like speaking about it, but i just can’t keep watching you suffer in silence, i do give you your space, but not when it truly concerns your well-being to the point i cant touch you or see you as often as i’d like to!” 

he stopped and took a deep breath, shaking his head 

“let’s go home first, i want to talk about this in a place i can do more for you.”

you were speechless

you never had expected him to notice anything, let alone speak up about it 

you were so lost in thought you let him drag you to his room quietly 

you snapped back to reality when he was unlocking his door, walking inside when it was open - you following 

you sat on his bed, still not knowing what to say

how the tables turn, usually its kageyama being the quiet one and you being the one to fill the silence with unnecessary babbling lol 

he looked at you, uncertainty swimming in his eyes

“can i see?”

you immediately knew what he was talking about, looking down 

you pondered over it a little before nodding

he crouched down before you, looking up at you 

“you know you can trust me, right?”

you furrowed your brows “of course”

“you don’t need to hide your feelings from me, baby, i love you through all of your emotional states, i love seeing you happy but i like comforting you when you feel sad too, you mustn’t hide your feelings.”

your eyes filled with tears at that one sentence

i love you through all of your emotional states

“thank you..” you sniffled

“i mean it. it hurts me when you hide it, it makes me feel so helpless, i don’t want to watch you crumble before my eyes, please, talk to me..”

“i just feel so hopeless, kags.. my heart feels so dull lately.”

you finally let in

“it feels like every single day repeats itself and all of my responsibilities are so hard to fulfill..it’s so hard turning up to school, bringing positive energy with me when all i feel is my sadness taking over my entire self bit by bit.”

he was listening, now sat on the floor before you, chin resting on your knee as you spoke

“but you’re not responsible for anyone’s happiness except yours. i don’t like when you prioritise others before yourself, y/n.. i don’t say it often but you’re truly so important to me and i don’t want you to lose yourself only because you try to make others happy.. it isn’t worth it, we love you for you, i can assure you, no one from our group would judge you for feeling down, we all have bad days, gosh, we all have bad weeks or even months! hiding these feelings will only worsen your pain and lead you to.. do irrational things..” he said, fingertips tracing over your hip gently

“let me see first and then we’ll talk about how we’re fixing this, ok?”

you sniffled and nodded, letting him pull the side of your pants down enough to reveal to him what he feared most 

seeing the cuts scattered on your skin broke him, truly.

he gulped and stood up, leaving to get you a pair of his shorts

“put these on, this way i can tend to them better.” he said, wanting to clean it up first before telling you his thoughts about it 

you nodded and changed into the shorts, him trying not to break down there and then as he left to get some stuff

when he came back you were patiently waiting for him and let him clean the cuts with some alcohol (not without complaining at the stings) before he bandaged them up as best as he could

he then laid down and pulled you with him, hugging you

“oh my precious y/n..” he mumbled

he was hugging your head to his chest to hide the fact that he was tearing up 

he wanted to help you so bad but he knew exactly that he couldn’t just end your suffering and it hurt him 

“but why? why do you do that to yourself?”

his voice cracked when he asked and you looked up, realisation hitting you 

you hurt him so bad by doing this.

the person you loved and cherished most 

“it felt like the only escape”

he caressed the top of your head

“pressuring you into stopping won’t help and isn’t worth it, but please, when you feel like.. doing that, call me instead. i’ll be at your place in no time and- even if you don’t want to talk i can just hug you and keep you company-”

you cut him off by pressing your lips against his

“i will, baby. i’ll call you whenever i feel down from now on”

he nodded “thank you”

he was thanking you as if he wasn’t the one helping you right now

you now hugged him back, “i’m sorry for not saying earlier..”

he hummed “lets just lay here. you’ll get better, i promise.”

he kept his promise

ever since that day, he’s been calling you morning and night, making sure you felt good waking up and going to bed 

he often called you through entire nights

he made you slowly start to understand that your purpose wasn’t to make anyone happy but yourself

he made you realise you were more than a mere person that’s always happy

and he made you understand that showing your feelings wasnt something to be embarrassed about 

(the entire team was very supportive too when they found out you were struggling! kageyama didn’t explain the details though)

so yep.

you had kageyama and a bunch of friends that were supporting you 

and for the first time, you felt hopeful for the future, your mother watching over you proudly after years of struggling and even having to move schools for a fresh start

she could now rest easily, knowing your guardian angel found his way to you and won’t ever leave you.

a/n: YALL I MADE MYSELF EMO WITH THIS ONE:( i hope you enjoyed it & please leave comments about it! 

[obeiii-mee]

Hi there! Im back, tysm for doing my HC ;;/ it was super cute, i really liked Mammons and Satans!! If you dont mind if i ask for another? Hdjsks Recently, i slipped while walking home with some pals and scrapped my knee. It wasnt too bad, but it sure looked bad lmao If you can could you do HCs for the boys reacting to MC slipping and scrapping there knee while walking w them? Im sure Mammon would have a heart attack hfjd Tysm!! Keep up the good work♡

Thank you so much! I hope your knee gets better and that it wasn’t too painful! The brothers would all be panicking in their own way but I agree, Mammon would faint or something lmao.

Hope this was OK.

————————————

The Brothers with an MC who fell and scraped their knee:

Lucifer:

-It was a miracle you managed to convince him to come out on a walk with you at all

-The man doesn’t know when to take a break from his work

-He’s more likely to accept if it’s you asking tho, he has an obvious soft spot for you

-The others call him a suck up behind his back because of it

-You were so happy that you managed to pry Lucifer away from his desk, you were basically skipping alongside him

-Long story short, you tripped over your own two feet and fell

-Luckily, your knees and palms were the only things that got a bit scruffy

-Well, actually your right knee looked as if someone tried removing your entire knee cap with a scalpel, skin and all but adrenaline was kicking in and you couldn’t feel much

-You’ve never seen Lucifer freeze the way he did then

-His mind just drew a blank

-You were about to shrug it off and call it a day, get up and continue your walk but daddy Lucifer can’t have that

-He has six younger brothers (and a younger sister at some point) he is pretty experienced when it comes to treating injuries

-You aren’t walking for the rest of the day, let me make this clear

-He will carry you back to the House of Lamentation no matter how much you protest

-In case it wasn’t obvious already, Lucifer gives off massive dad vibes and now he’s bandaging your leg while you’re laying down on his bed

-While the rest of the brothers watch the two of you from behind the door frame because they are all equally worried

-Get ready for the three hour lecture coming your way

-He’s pissed and amused at the same time tbh

-Silly human, falling over like that and hurting themselves

-Lord Diavolo forbid you try to get out of that bed, he will drag you back and make sure you stay there until your knee is better (kinky)

Mammon:

-He was on his merry way to the casino to blow off all of Lucifer’s money and you tagged along solely for the purpose of making sure he didn’t spend all of Lucifer’s money

-You’d both be done for if he did

-But I guess fate really had it out for you on that day since your foot slipped on....something and you tripped

-Both of your knees looked bloody and damaged as hell but you were more irritated than anything

-Mammon on the other hand did a fucking double take and almost passed out

-He screeched his lungs out

-One look at your injured knees and he was ready to drag you all the way to the human realm on foot to find you a doctor

-“MC ARE YOU OK WHY THE FUCK IS THERE SO MUCH BLOO-HOLY SHIT STAY STILL DON’T MOVE! THE GREAT MAMMON WILL FIX THIS...SOMEHOW.”

-It was very dramatic, he cried

-You stood up to prove that you were alright because you thought he was going to have a seizure soon enough

-OK, that helped him calm down a little

-At least now he knew your legs weren’t about to get torn off and you weren’t on the verge of death

-Fuck the casino, you were going home

-Like Lucifer, don’t expect you will walk home by yourself

-He will carry you, a bit embarrassed by his initial freak out but still eyeing your wound, concerned

-As soon as you get home and the other brothers help you out because he’s shit at bandaging, he just sits in his own pool of misery and guilt

-Your poor knees wouldn’t be so jacked up if you hadn’t come along with him today

-He was so determined to make it up to you, he stayed by your bedside like a loyal puppy with a wagging tail (flashback to the animal event)

-Overall, he almost went into cardiac arrest and was too panicked to realise you were fine

-You thought he was smothering and overprotective before? Good luck for the rest of the week

Levi:

-“See, this is why I don’t like going out. There’s always some normie laying on the groun- OH MY LORD DIAVOLO, MC IS THAT YOU?? ARE YOU OK?”

-HIS HENRY ALMOST DIED ON THE NEWLY POLISHED FLOOR OF AN ANIME CONVENTION, HE HAS VERY MIXED EMOTIONS

-You fell knees first and hurt them quiet badly but you could stand, even if the pain made you twitch a little

-This confused Levi because you looked fine even though your knees certainly didn’t

-You told him you felt alright and it wasn’t that big of a deal and he absolutely rolled with it

-But you guys still went home after that

-He said it was because you bled all over your cosplay but that’s just him being a tsundere

-Levi is usually very shy when it comes to physical contact but he firmly insisted that he help you walk home

-I mean, he knows you said you were feeling OK and maybe humans just have a lot of tolerance for injuries like that

-But he still felt it was necessary that he took you home and checked out your injuries

-He kept the mood light while disinfecting you’re wound with some help from Satan by talking about how the convention went

-High low-key relieved seeing you walk around like normal two minutes after that

-He started bitching to you about how you made him miss his the event but he didn’t mean any of it

-“Stupid normie, making me miss my favourite Ruri-chan event. You’re lucky I love you and think you’re cute....did I just say that out loud??”

Satan:

-Oh dear, why would you go out for a walk in the middle of a rainstorm? What were you thinking?

-Actually, it was Satan’s idea

-He may be a demon and the prince of Wrath no less, but he is such a sappy, cheesy bastard at times

-He definitely thinks that walking and kissing in the rain is very romantic (bet he read something like that in an erotica)

-You know what’s not romantic blondie? Slipping on a very small puddle and potentially fracturing your leg

-It was just a scraped knee but you were frustrated enough to be extra

-He’s helping you up before you even have the chance to realise you fell in the first place

-Your knee was looking pretty bad so you guys went home just to avoid any further casualties

-He’s actually chuckling all the way back while you playfully glare at him because how dare he laugh at your misery?

-Date night was ruined but at least he got to take care of you

-He knew your knee must have hurt and he felt bad but he couldn’t help but giggle a bit to himself because your fall was so comical

-Ah but he does enjoy fussing over you for the rest of the night a bit too much

Asmo:

-You thought Mammon was melodramatic?

-Take a look at this fucking guy

-He actually screeches even louder than his brother and probably falls to his knees too (but not really because those pants were expensive)

-His screams definitely got the attention of at least 10 random passerbyers

-He’s actually on the verge of crying

-I mean, can you blame him?? Look at your beautiful knees!! They were ruined

-He felt so bad for you, he actually babied the hell out of you that day

-“Asmo, it’s fine. It’s just a scrap.”

-“A SCRAP, MC IT LOOKS LIKE YOUR KNEE IS ABOUT TO FALL OFF YOUR POOR SKIN-“

-It was just a scrap but Asmo’s secret talent is being extra as fuck

-He totally spilled all the tea to the rest of the brothers when he got home

-And then he ushered you into his room

-Funnily enough, he’s pretty good with injuries. Not as much as Satan and Lucifer but still

-He pampered you for the next few hours but that image of your skin being all grazed like that will forever haunt him

-How can you not be so bothered by it?? He’d die if he was in your place

-I love Asmo just because of how dramatic he is

Beel:

-Your shoelaces were undone and of course that meant a fun little trip to the floor of Hell’s Kitchen

-Beel didn’t notice you fell at first, he was concentrating on his food and assumed you were next to him

-But then he realised that you weren’t and for a moment he thought you disappeared or something

-Before he turned to find you laying on the floor, curled up because life was pain and you were suffering

-“Are you OK? Or are you just tired? Belphie does that a lot when he’s tired.” Or depressed one might say

-But for real, he’s good at identifying serious wounds and less serious wounds since he’s an athlete

-He can tell your knees were bleeding way more than they should have from just a simple scrap

-He slinged you over his shoulder and carried you, calmly, back home, with a burger still in his hand

-He’s actually really collective and talked to you while cleaning up your injury to take your mind off the pain

-He knows humans are a little more fragile than demons so even though he knows it’s not a big deal, he can’t help but worry

-It’s kinda hard falling around him tho because chances are, he will actually catch you even if he happens to hold something

-He’s sad if you’re sad so please don’t cry he will bandage your scraped knee do you want the last bit of his burger to make you feel better?

-Comfort hugs afterwards!

-Which is awesome because Beel gives out best hugs :)

Belphie:

-Ah yes, another beautiful day at RAD

-Walking alongside with your grumpy and sleepy boyfriend when a random demon bumps into you

-Wel not bumps, more like shoves you so hard you fall down and tear the fabric of your pants

-While the dude shrugs it off and speeds away

-You were a bit pissed off because rude

-But Belphie was fucking fuming

-He felt so offended on your part

-I mean, the nerve of him

-He was tired as shit but he wanted to chase after him and throw hands, possibly fill his pillow with rocks and hit him over the head with it

-He forced himself to focus on you first before hunting the moron down

-He was a bit concerned when he didn’t see you come back up after you fell

-Turns out, you scraped your knee pretty horribly and now you were bleeding all over the floor

-He’s even more quiet than usual as he helps you up and half carries you to your next class

-He starts taking care of your knee in the middle of DevilDom history he doesn’t give a flying fuck

-He’s still furious by the time he gets home and most of his brothers know to leave him be when he makes that scary ass face

-No talk to him

-He angy

-“Does your knee still hurt?”

-“A bit but it’s not-“

-“Come nap with me.”

-“Why?”

-“Naps shall cure your pain.”

-“...”

-“Nah but for real come take a nap with me.”

-Next day at school, the dude from yesterday walks by him and Belphie smashes his head against the wall

-Before walking away as if nothing happened

-I stan protective Belphie

These HCs are really bad but I love them anyway

Al~

[daddynegandesires]

Secrets chapter 3

Summary: ellies birthday and mothers day is coming up as emotions and pent up anger are spiraling between you, negan, and jack while more and more secrets begin to unfold.

18+

Warming: nsfw, fluff, kink, depression, abuse

Sorry for the late update on this chapter its kind of a short one ive just have been going through some personal things and havent found the motivation to finish this one yet.❤ i hope you all like it!❤

--------------------------------

--------------------

You and negan haven't spoke in a few days ellies birthday is today and you have been busy decorating. Negan is suppose to be picking up the cake at the store. jack has returned back from his "business trip" withq an odd hickey on his neck that keeps gawking at you everytime you speak to him. You want to avoid conflict because you arent so innocent yourself after what happen with negan last time you saw him but thats just not who you are....you have to confront him but you also dont want to ruin ellies day infront of everyone.

"Hey jack, do you mind helping me with this streamer" you called out to him from the ladder

"Sure hun" he took the streamer from your hand taping it up to the wall

"Thank you.....uh negan should be here soon with her cake" you said folding up the step ladder

"I could of went and grabbed it" he scoffs

"I uh..well sorry i didnt know it was a big deal" you try to laugh it off politely

"Dont even worry about it...." He walks past you ramming his ahoulder into you heading outside

Negan had arrive with the cake and so did a few of ellies friends and your mother. You and your mothers relationship really has never been that great but you try to make peace with it for ellies sake. Negan came in with a huge gift box all wrapped in pink with a bow.

" i thought we agreed nothing crazy" you whispered to him

"Whaat...can i not spoil my girl" negan grins at you

Ellie runs out of her room her eyes light up at the size of the gift her dad got her.

"Mommy look at this...its humongo!" She says messing with the bow

"I see honey..dont mess with it yet" you giggle

"Where is your boy toy.." His tongue slides across his bottom lip

You kept silent while negan stared you down waiting for a response but nothing came out his eyes were burning a hole through you he always knew when shit was up.

"Ah i see....the silent treatment" folding his arms

Negan walks off to go play with ellie and say hello to a few people when your mother walks up to you.

"Hey mom..." You say emotionless

"What is negan doing here.." She asks

"Mom...please dont. Thats ellies dad. I told you we are trying to work on things for ellies sake" you say annoyed.

"Well...once a cheater always a cheater. Im just saying" as she sips on her cup of wine walking away

A few hours have passed and ellie got to blow out her candles and eat cake. Jack still hasnt said much to you throughout the whole party and its more than obvious that negan is starting to catch on im just hoping he doesn't notice the hicky on his neck. Ellie has been bugging you about negans gift so you were going to let her open it.

"Ellie open it up over here sweetie so everyone can see" you say smiling

Ellie quikly rips the hot pink rapping paper off and squeals in excitement as she realizes its a electric scooter that she has been wanting. Negan was standing by your side with his hand sneakily rested on your lower back with a huge smile on his face.

"Oh my god you got me that scooter!!" Ellie begins jumping up and down

"Negan....those cost alot" you whispered in his ear

"dont worry about it....i got it taken car of" he says sternly

"Lets take it outside!!" Negans runs over and picks it up in excitment with all of the kids following him outside to ride on the scooter. You were throwing away dirty plates when jack came up to you

"So you want to explain why you and negan have been so close" he quietly says to you

You instantly start to burn with rage as he asks you that knowing he has been keeping things from you too and the fact his assistant melissa has been speaking to him inappropriately. You were holing the knife in your hand for cutting the cake reminding you of the incident that happened between you and negan once you found out he was cheating. you froze and gripped tightly on the knife thinking of how to approach this.

"You're a fucking whore..." He spat at you

"Jack.....get the fuck away from me" you quietly say

"Yeah i bet thats what you want.....so he can fuck you" he says through gritted teeth

"Its. Ellies. Birthday.....fucking knock it off we can settle this later" you slowly set the knife down unclenching your fist

Jack stands there glaring at you with his jaw clecnhed before giving up and walking away. You let out a sigh of relief and pour yourself a glass of wine. You take a sip closing your eyes feeling like everything is going in slomotion in that moment when you here yelling outside and notice its negan and jack. You drop your glass spilling your wine everywhere running outside.

"Back the fuck off man!" Jack yells with his fist balled up

"Ohh...you really want to go there dude..." Negan laughs

"You are fucking (y/n) and i know it!" Jack lunges towards him throwing a punch hitting negan in the face making him stumble

Negan catches his balace reaching up to his face touching where jack punched him in the mouth realizing he is bleeding negan licks the blood off his lips and lets out a sinister almost scary deep chuckle.

"Oh...you fucked up." Negan lunges towards jack football tackling him to the ground he starts punching jack over and over again blood all over his fists

"Negan!!!...no! Stop!" You rush over trying to pry negan off of jack

"Negan stop for ellie please!" You begin to cry struggling to finally get him off causing you to fall backwards with negan on you

"You are a dead fucking man!....now get the fuck off my property..." Negan threats

You push negan off to go check on jack you try to get jack to respond to you and see if he is okay but he just spits in your face shoving you away causing you to fall before you know it negan charges back over and starts beating the shit out of him all you can do is scream at them and cry. Through tear filled eyes you notice the cops rushing up the street pulling into the drive way the last thing you remember is the cops pulling negan off and everything went black.

---------------------------------------------

Jack and negan were both arrested but were soon let go apparently i had fainted due to stress and dehydration they kept me in the hospital until i was better. You kicked jack out of the house and you haven't spoke to negan since ellies birthday. Things have been rough being alone for ahwile and ellie was getting upset about not seeing her dad.

Text from negan:

Hey....im coming by

You looked at your phone to see a text from negan but you just ignored it and continued to cook some food for ellie. There was a knock at the door you sighed annoyingly before unlocking the deadbolt and opening the door to negans innocent brown eyes staring back at you. before you could give him a chance to speak you shut the door in his face but he quickly caught it in time with his foot in the doorway before it closed.

"Negan...ellie should be home. She is still upset" you sigh

"Thats okay i want to make it up to you two" he says pushing the door open coming inside

You just stand there silent with your arms crossed untill you hear ellies bus coming down the road and before you know it she busts through the door yelling.

"Mommmyyyy! Happy mothers dayzz!" Ellies runs up to you handing you a picture she made at school

"Awe...thank you sweet heart its gorgeous" you took the pink paper from her smiling and when to hang it on the fridge

"Look i want to take you two out to dinner...its mothers day and you deserve it..look i know i fucked up but that asshole had it coming" negan says

"Negan dont.....go ask Ellie she is the real one you need to be apologizing to not me" you stare at the ground avoiding eye contact.

"Ohh ellie daddy wants to talk to you!" He walks off to her room

-----------------------------------------------

You, negan, and ellie were all out at dinner at your favorite steakhouse enjoying your meal when the waiter brought a bottle of wine

"Negan....i cant afford that" you quietly say

"Ah ah....you deserve it i mean you are the best mom ever" he winks at you popping the lid off pouring wine into your glass

"Thanks..." You shyly say before taking a sip

"So.....the school fired me" negan cleared his throat

You choked on your drink hearing the words that had just came out of negans mouth

"What?..how come" you say wipping wine off your chin

"Well....they dont want me as a coach anymore since what happened at ellies birthday. They say its wildly inappropriate and against policy to still have me there" he bites in his steak

"What are you going to do..." You ask worried

"Ohhh no biggie i always have things taken care of" he smiles at you

"If you need anything im here..." You look up at him

" i know....thank you" he reaches across the table holding your hand

The three of you finish up dinner afterwards you all go for a late walk through the park. It felt nice to get out and have some fresh air after what happended at the party. Your phone kept buzzing off the hook of texts from jack you kept trying to hide it from negan to not let him worry. You felt bad hiding it from negan but you knew it would start a fight but you also didnt want to let jack go without some talking. Negan took you and ellie back home ellie ran inside and got ready for bed.

"I know he is talking to you..." Negan says sternly while placing one hand against the wall beside your head

"Negan....can we not talk about this right now" you say turning your head away from him

"No!...you will look at me when im speaking to you" negan grabs ahold of your chin forcing you to look at him

"Yes....yes im still talking to him.." You say embarassed

"Why....he is such a load of whoreshit....im standing right infront of you (y/n)...im here now! Take me back please. Im an honest man now!" Negan growls

" get...off of me!" You scream and shove him away from you and begin to walk angrily down the road

"(Y/n) get back here now!...where the fuck do you think you are going!" Negan trys to catch up with you when it suddenly starts raining

"Negan stop trying so hard!...this is going nowhere!" You say crying

"Why do you keep saying that!...i want this to work!" Negan finally catches up to you grabbing you by the arm spinning you around

"......well i dont..." You choked on those words as they slipped out of your mouth it felt like your heart had just stopped for a split second it killed you to say that to negan but it had to be done

"You....dont want this." He said quietly and upset with rain drops running down his perfect face

"Negan....i.... I cant. You have to let me go" you say caressing his face" you said giving him a half smile with a single tear rolling down your cheek

"W....what about ellie.....thats my babygirl" Negan begans to tear up pulling you into a hug

"You can still be in ellies life.....i start therapy next tuesday" you say ending the hug

"You can talk to me (y/n)" negan sniffles

"There are just things that just feel easier letting out to a stranger sometimes..."

"I love you....." Negan says bresthlessly

"....i love you too but from a distance.....i have boundaries set now negan"

You and negan began to walk back to the house getting inside you hand him a towel to dry himself off. Negan follows you to the bedroom.

"There are still some of your clothes in the closet...." You say facing away from him

"You still have some of my old clothes here...." Negan opens the door seeing his shirts still hanging in the same spot before he moved out

"I didnt know if you still wanted them or not..." You say nervously

"Its okay. Thank you" negan takes off his soaking wet shirt switching it out with an old faded band shirt

"You can sleep on the couch if you would like..." You offer him

"You sure you are going to be okay with that?" He raises an eyebrow at you

"Yeah....plus its been lonely here just me and ellie" you chuckle handing him a blanket

Negan takes the blanket from you before turing around to open the bedroom door to leave. As soon as the door shut you quietly sobbed making sure it wasnt loud enough for negan to hear. You wiped your tears away before getting yourself ready for bed. You tossed and turned for most of the night your head filled with unnecessary thoughts and cenarios. You just wanted all of this pain to go away you dont know what you are doing with yourself anymore the only thing that keeps you holding on is ellie and negan.

----------------------

------------------

[aquariusshadow]

Live!Blogging HSMTMTS s2x9

Yessssss another early(ish) morning live!blog.

Portwell Nation and Andi Mack stans how we feelin today?

Lessssss gooooo

--

"maybe real happiness is about something else" *cuts to howie singing about love and the portwell duke sweatshirt scene* HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

oh no are seblos arguing????

so everyone's on the zoom chat except for ricky

ah ok that's explained phew

that was a cute zoom call

fsbdlsdfahskdfha

gina

what are you doing

ok her accent is very good

(at least i think it is ehehe i'm not great at assessing accents)

ajsdlfhjsdflsdfalhsdfhasdf

SHE CALLS HIM EEJ

he...called her to see what she says about ashlyn painting his nail

its the little things

theyre a married couple your honor

awww gina i get it all too well

but

she likes him

he likes her

thats what matters right now

hahahaha

oh no depressed ricky :(

rickerapy plz

hes a smol burrito

his mom better figure out theres something more going on with ricky and send him to therapy or something

this better not just be "oh rini broke up"

ricky sir

you need to work on yourself

jonah beck

JONAH BECK

BUFFY AND JONAH REUNION

daaaaaaaaang

interesting dynamic we got goin on here

burrito blanket turned into burrito hoodie

poor ricky

he's fiiiiiiiinally talking

im glad he's opening up to his mom

i hope his mom gives him legit good advice and actually tries to help him

hm....are they gonna make ricky a catalyst for nini's muse and thats gonna be how they get back together in the future or something?

cuz im not sure how i feel about that atm ehehe

jack and gina pretend to be siblings

ej and gina pretend to be dating

im just gonna leave that there

kourt's a legend lmao

"i never lie...except when i do" incredible

i mean...theyre teenagers. jack isnt able to get tattoos yet lmao

the duuuuuuuuke sweatshirt ahhhhhhh

YES WE'RE TALKING ABOUT IT

RICKY'S FEELINGS ABOUT THE DIVORCE/TODD

FINALLY

RICKERAPY CONTENT YESSSSSS

and we're talking about how ricky doesnt like change

finally

THERAPY

HIS MOM SAID THERAPY

RICKERAPY IS BASICALLY CANON

im sorry i'll calm down now

haljdlfhdsjfalsd

yesssssss

"let them go"

thank you mama ricky

spitting some good advice here

finally someone told ricky all this oh my lord

nooooooooooo

seblos conflict :(

aight north high whatcha got

sigh

you know

if they really had "theatre in their hearts and minds" all during spring break

then they would'nt hav spent the time stalking East High's instagrams and making the vid

idk i find the North High plot kinda meh

OMFG EJ

SIR WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THE SOCKHAND

i love him so much hahaha

buffy and jonah dance off? yes plz

ooooooo this music video is pretty cool :D

this is so catchy i really like it

i actually really enjoyed all the jack and gina scenes--they seemed to really help show some character growth for her

im v impressed

awwwwwwwww rickyyyyyyyyyy

this is really good tho what

he's finally letting go of nini

some ricky character growth

this is a really good song tho maaaan

the emotion :(

HALDHFAJDFLHSA

EJ

HE CAME TO THE AIRPORT

THIS IS ADORABLE

HE BROUGHT HER A GRANOLA BAR

yall get yourself a guy like ej holy shit

--

Perfect way to end the episode. Not much to say other than I think this was definitely one of the best episodes this season. Rickerapy and Portwell nation how we doin today?

I'm very content with the character growth shown this episode.

[khuzena]

I love you to the moon and back

Ff xiao

your pov.

Tw. Double suicide, depression, angst, fluff at end,

"Babe, i just want to talk about something."

"Huh? What is it?" xiao questions you

"I.. You always go on adventures with traveler but not me, im not jealous but can we please spend sometime together? You always ignore me..." you say as you pout

"Im busy ok." he scoffs at you

" But babe can you atleast tell me where you're going sometimes? You're making me worry..."

You reach out to his hand but he slaps your hand away from him.

"I don't need your permission. I help the traveler with their adventures because they're stronger and better than you."

He glares at you with the scariest and coldest glare ever.

You feel fear rush all over you.

'why traveler? why not me? im your lover xiao' those flood all over you

As xiao looks away from you, you feel the tears prickling down your cheeks. These tears make you feel like it's burning your skin. It's painful. Why?!? Why?!? What did I do wrong?

Xiao just ignores your cries and before he left the room he said

"You really thought I loved you? I fucking hate you annoying little shit always clinging onto me"

You couldn't help but cry even more when xiao just abandoned you alone in your room.

The floors were becoming tearstained and the walls were echoing with your cries.

The pain is so overwhelming that you can't even move your limbs.

_______

After a week that fight happened between you two, Xiao just ignores you. It's like you never existed to him. And you, still dwelling on that painful memory. Everything hurts. You wanted to end it all.. But you didn't want to give up yet, you always tried to talk him but he doesn't even look your way.

what did i ever do wrong?

Ah yes.

Traveler chitchatting with him. The expression on his face... I've never seen that happy look on him. I envy traveler.

'if only i was like them?'

'i wish i wasn't like this'

Days went on and traveler and xiao have fun together while you are here just suffering

You run away but you can't stop remembering his face with the traveler.

Everything reminds me of him...

...

You grip hard on the pen as you write your farewell letter.

The letter is already wet from the tears even though you just wrote the

'dear xiao,'

It hurts knowing that you'll finally leave him and this world. This was your decision, remember? He was the only reason that made you move forward no matter what the situation. You wanted to live for yourself and for him. Now that he's left your grasp, you have nothing left. Yes, you do have many friends and wealth but at what cost?

Your life feels dull and gloomy.

'it hurts so much to write everything i feel on this letter but it's better than letting it in forever in my heart'

As many seconds, hours and days go by, you've finally finished the letter. You brought yourself to finally finish it. Even though it was merely a letter, it was like a way of freeing these hurtful emotions inside. It took you a week to finish it.

Not because you were busy or anything but it was because it just hurt knowing you'll finally do it.

It.

The word 'it' maybe a simple and short word but it has many meanings. By the it that you would do. It's the depressing one.

You'll finally let go of everything

I just, want to say goodbye for the very last time

________________

Xiao pov.

I was so irritated by them whining for your attention that it made something inside you awaken.

Anger.

I just wanted them stop blabbering about shit.

"You really thought I loved you? I fucking hate you annoying little shit always clinging onto me"

You really lost it. Huh?

I try to look away from them and they're crying...

I.... Did this?!?

I glance back at them as they're just facing the floor and letting the tears run from their face to the floor.

...

I can feel it.

The karmic bonds again...

I feel so ashamed...

Why?????

I dont want to see you cry again..

My body froze for a minute until I walk at the door and close it behind me...

What have I done?!?

Im so sorry y/n...

_______

After a week that fight happened between you two, I just feel so ashamed to look at them again. To the point that I ignore them and give them the cold shoulder. I keep on dwelling on that stupid painful memory... Why can't I stop seeing her face everywhere?

As I lay my body on the railings, I notice traveler coming up to my direction.

"Hey xiao I was jusy wondering if you're ok... You look kinda sad today... You can take a break for a while from adventuring with me."

Traveler's face looks so emphatic. Like how y/n's face when they see me suffering from my karmic bonds again.

"nothing's wrong." i say to the traveler

'that's a lie. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it!'

Why? Why do i keep seeing and remembering that tear stained face that day when we fought?

I just want to forget it.

"Huh? You really don't look okay."

...

"*sigh* Fine. Something happened between me and y/n. I can't get it off my chest and whenever I see those dull and teary eyes, it makes me feel like crying and when I do, it stings... It hurts traveler"

im so weak for letting traveler see this side of me. i should've held it in. but i can't.

"no... It's okay xiao, tell me about it.. Im always here for you, okay?"

When I hear crying, I always her their crying and begging for me to stay.

Everything reminds me of them...

...

I told traveler the situation and they look disheartened.

They're already giving me help on how to bring back me and y/n's relationship back.

While we think about what to do for an apology, traveler gave me an idea on how to apologise to y/n. They said that I should say something to them.

Like sorry and I love yous

But all I want right now is their warmth.

If only, I didn't lose my cool.

None of this would've happened.

I don't want them to really leave me. I want y/n to stay with me. I really fucking love them but I freeze whenever I think about facing them again. It feels shameful to face someone and apologise rgiht in front of them, even though I've done terrible things to them

' * **** *** ** *** **** *** ****'

Yes. Thats what i should tell them.

I don't want to let go of y/n, they're my everything

I just, want to apologise and be with them again

______

your pov.

You couldn't face him.

You can't bring your self to say that you're thankful for everything and you're ready to end yourself.

Xiao was always with me even when i was young, he was there to always love and take care of me. So i took care of him as well when he was at his lowest because of the karmic bonds and conflicts.

Who knew it would end like this?

You slip the letter at the side of the balcony where xiao sits, hoping that he takes it and reads it.

After that, you go to the place where it all started,

The cliff at the mountains of qingyun peak.

_____________

Xiao pov.

As i mustered up the strength to face them directly thanks to traveler, I go to the balcony first to calm myself down first.

As I lay my self at the balcony sides, i notice a letter on the sides.

Huh? A letter at the balcony?

This is unusual.

It's wet from tears. Nonetheless, it's just a small letter for someone who i dont care about.

Wait.. What?

To me??

As i open the letter, I was horrified from its contents.

P1/2

[beomglocks]

colors ; k.th

part of the badlands series!

colors: “you’re ripped at every edge but you’re a masterpiece.”

based off halsey’s badlands album.

warnings and other: museum curator!taehyun, old money!y/n, mentions of depression and grass smoking, little bit of angst i guess??

taehyun sighed as he took down the 11th painting this week. the museum hadn't been very busy in the past couple of weeks, maybe because the weather was getting colder. one part of him figured that many people just wanted to be bundled up at home watching holiday themed movies and drinking warm drinks rather than appreciating enchanting artworks.

he couldn't fool himself though, he knew the truth. today's generation didn't care about the fine arts anymore. a shame, seeing as everything around them seemed to be inspired by it.

kang taehyun worked at his local museum. he had been offered the position by the owner one night while roaming the place. this should've been a red flag looking back. the owner seemed desperate for someone to fill in the position since the previous employee had left without notice. nonetheless, taehyun took the job and didn't regret it one bit.

open 24/7, the red haired boy was always working on the clock. not that there was much to do seeing as most of the people his age or even a bit older didn't hang around museums purely for the joy of it. actually, his only job was to exhibit the newly arrived collections, clean and dust them off, and conduct regular tours and workshops for the public. due to this and the fact that not many people even came by he would take regular breaks.

once in a while you'd see the occasional old person or art expertee roaming around the small museum. if you were lucky, you'd see the local edgy teens posing next to a piece they didn't understand just to get an aesthetic picture. taehyun would also have the unfortunate job of shooing them away or scolding them for getting just a bit too close.

recently his boss, who was the museum manager and maybe the only other person besides taehyun that worked there, had informed him that due to funds and unfortunate unforeseen events, the museum would be closing down in about a month from now. this caused taehyun to fall deep into a depression since this was his only job and he loved it here. the museum was like his second home. he found comfort in the silent images displayed throughout the building. they always told him a story and when new pieces came in he would sit and stare attentively at the new anecdote being told to him.

taehyun smiled sadly at the piece he had just taken down. it was a painting of 2 people kissing however both of their faces were covered by white cloths. this was his favorite and he didn't even have a clue as to why. probably because of the uncertainty of what the other was feeling or because of the fact that the other couldn't see each other's faces through the cloth, that would've made the kiss more exciting in his opinion.

he stepped out of the museum and into the frosty air of the outside world. it was only autumn so why was it so cold? he thought to himself. he discreetly pulled out a prerolled blunt and his white lighter from his pocket. he lit it and stuck in between his slightly chapped lips.

maybe smoking dope wasn't the healthiest thing in the world, especially for a boy so young, barely 19, but it helped taehyun get his mind off the inevitably of losing his job and being homeless for the winter. he shuttered at the thought. he would have to room with one of his friends, he sighed shaking his head. no, he didn't want to be a burden, yeonjun had helped him enough as it is.

he looked at his surroundings taking in the cold autumn afternoon. the trees had long lost their leaves and were bare. the sky was a murky gray color as if it were threatening to rain any time soon. he noticed a girl bundled up in winter clothes near the entrance of the building glance at him. he smiled at her and she jumped at the eye contact, thinking that he wouldn't catch her. taehyun chuckled as he watched her rush into the museum. "back to work," he said out loud to himself.

once the blunt had been almost gone, he smoked what was left of it and headed back into the empty museum. he was feeling light-headed, the effects of the blunt finally taking action, but taehyun was used to it so it barely affected him as much.

he made his way to the girl who was now starting to take off her jacket and scarf. taehyun tapped on the girl's shoulder to get her attention. "hi," he smiled at the girl, showing off his dazzling smile. "if you'd like, i could give you a tour of the museum." well what's left of it anyways, he thought to himself.

"oh...no thank you," said the girl. she smiled warmly at the worker. "well not to be invasive of your decision but it's sort of in my job description," taehyun replied as he rubbed the back of his neck. the girl sighed in defeat, "i guess i have no choice then."

taehyun laughed as he took her coat and scarf to hang up in the public closet, "yep, trust me. they say im not that bad of a tour guide, im quite fun to be around if i do say so myself. i promise not to bore you too much." the girl nodded, not entirely convinced. "if i do end up bored i will hold you accountable..." she took a moment to take a peek at taehyun's name tag, "kang taehyun," she joked.

as they walked through the museum the girl couldn't help but notice that it was fairly empty. "why are there almost no paintings in here?" she laughed hesitantly. "i thought this was a museum?" taehyun stopped walking, turning to her with a sad expression on his face.

"the museum is expected to close in about a month or so," he stated simply. "oh...that's terrible. may i ask why?" the girl responded. "my boss says we've run out of funds or something like that," taehyun chuckled bitterly. "people don't really give a shit about good art these days anyways."

"that's a shame..."

they continued to look through the various paintings that were still up and occasionally the girl would ask to see the ones that were taken down and left on the floor. it seemed the two were lost in each other's company as night started to approach.

"thank you for the tour of this lovely museum taehyun. it was fun but it's a shame such a nice museum like this is closing down," the girl said softly. taehyun nodded solemnly, he just wanted to get this day over with and crash at his apartment. he didn't blame the girl before him but talking to her reminded him of his harsh reality. a notification coming from the girl's bag made both of them jump as they were both lost in their thoughts.

"ah, that must be my father. he's kind of annoying when it comes to my curfew," she chuckled, digging her phone from her bag. taehyun watched her with a bored expression until his eyes reached her bag. he hadn't noticed this earlier but she had been carrying a louis vuitton bag. his eyes bulged at the expensive item that was so close to him, they got even larger when she fished out the latest iphone from it.

taehyun wasn't poor per se, he had just enough to get by since he was living paycheck to paycheck. however, he had never been in such close proximity to any luxury items. he suddenly felt weird being this close to this girl.

"what do you mean by curfew?" taehyun asks hesitantly. the girl sighs, "my father is one of south korea's richest chaebol's, maybe one of the big three at his point." she rolled her eyes as if this information was nothing. "he's super strict with me because i guess i'm just his show pony daughter whom he can show off to say he's a good father."

taehyun gulped, had he just been casually hanging out with the daughter of one of the richest men in korea? he felt sick at this. she looked up at taehyun's uneasy expression, "oh my god im sorry i just dumped that all on you! i just needed to catch a break so i came here, i didn't mean to drag you into my life story."

taehyun fixes his face, laughing nervously, "no- no its fine really. we all need a break sometimes right? im glad you got to have that time here." the girl smiled up at him, completely misreading his nervous laughter, "im glad i got to spend it here with you taehyun."

"oh before i go!" taehyun watched her pull out a checkbook from her bag and his stomach dropped. he silently watched her scribble some stuff onto the slip and tear it out, handing it to him.

"there's not too much i can take out of my account without my father flipping out but i hope this helps even just a little. whether it be in your personal life or with the museum."

taehyun eyes the check and chokes when he sees 50,000 dollars written neatly on the black line. he swears he can feel sweat going down his face like in the cartoons. "i- i cant possibly take this from you." he moves to hand the check back but the girl refuses to take it back. "taehyun, you love this museum with your entire being. i see the way to look at the paintings and the passion with which you explained them to me. i'd hate to see that taken away."

"plus, if you're gone who's gonna give me the tour when i come back?" she laughs as if this is something casual. taehyun's hands shake as he pockets the check, "i seriously cannot thank you enough...you don't know how much you just helped the museum and m-"

the girls phone dings again and she grumbles, "ugh why can't he just leave me alone. sorry but i think i really gotta go for real before he tracks my location or something crazy like that."

taehyun nods wistfully at the mention of her having to leave. he was really starting to enjoy her company.

"oh by the way," the girl giggles as she pulls her coat on hurriedly.  "was that you smoking weed at the corner of the museum earlier?" the girl chuckled to herself again just remembering it. taehyun furrowed his eyebrows, "why would you say that kind of thing at out loud and at my job?!" he scolded in a playful hushed voice.

"i just thought it was funny and you also smelled of weed the entire tour, i didn't mind though so don't worry," the girl concluded. she was starting to walk away towards out the door now. "i'll walk you out," taehyun offers. "such a helpful employee. is this in the job description too?" the girl jokes, turning to him while a smile on her lips. "well, not exactly," taehyun says smoothly.

she shakes her head, "i'll see you soon taehyun." he watches her walk off into the darkness of the night when he suddenly remembers something.

"hey what's your name by the way?" he shouts after the girl. for some reason taehyun really was hopeful of seeing her again.

"y/n!" came the disembodied voice of the girl he had just met.