#alex and pepper gray

[justarandomidiot1]

me and my bird as Ace Attorney characters!

name explanation:

me and my parrot's names being Alex and Pepper respectively is a nice coincidence since they can easily be nods to Dr. Irene Pepperberg and her work with Alex the African gray

"Gray" was chosen as a last name to keep the African gray motif

[justsome-di]

Now a Pulitzer Prize winning book (don’t fact check this, just trust me) and featured on Obama’s 2023 Summer Reading List!

You should be reading Nobody Ends Up Dead in a Bathtub, Everyone Keeps Their Organs! Why? See above.

It’s a good story if I do say so myself. And if you read it, you’re a cool kid. Don’t you want to be a cool kid? This is something called peer pressure, and it usually works.

But for real, if you read Nobody Ends Up Dead then you’re going to go on a good adventure with good characters I guarantee you will love. Not to brag, but it is a pretty good story. There’s funny one-liners, a cute plot, and relatable characters that have been developed for years. Just heed warnings at the beginning of chapters. NEUD deals with some heavy topics such as eating disorders.

NEUD is officially all online for free. But you can still access bonus chapters and short stories on Patreon for only $4.

Links: 

AO3

Wattpad

Patreon (Patrons had early access to the whole novel and also get exclusive short stories with the characters and sneak peaks for new projects!)

Netflix Previews

Characters’ Playlists

You can also check out my carrd if there are any updates to how/where I post, it’ll probably be the most accurate place to find new or updated links.

Transcript under cut:

The Story is Dope

A New York office worker and a sex worker get set up on a date--one thinking it's a real blind date, the other under the impression it's an ordinary appointment. After realizing it was all a shitty prank, they set out for revenge. Their plan: show up to an upcoming Halloween office party as a genuine couple, convincing the pranksters they genuinely fell in love and refusing to let themselves become the butt of the joke.

Our main characters are Alex, an awkward admin assistant for a medical company who hasn't been on a date since he was a teenager, and Damián, a sex worker who seems way out of Alex's league but keeps insisting on spending time with him so they can perfect their revenge scheme.

The novel features a diverse cast and explores sex positivity. I also like to believe that it portrays sex work well. Damián is a hardworking man, doing what he loves, and meeting mostly great people along the way--but he also would benefit greatly if sex work was decriminalized and therefore had better resources at his disposal.

If you're looking for a story with LGBT characters that's mostly light-hearted but still packs a punch every few chapters, this is it! Overall, it's a happy story.

The Characters!

oh boy the characters!

we got Damián who's hardworking and doting on his lil bro but oh wow does he have some angst

we got Alex who is nothing more than a burning ball of anxiety trying his best--all too relatable

Leo, Damián's bro, is an ally, and he will make sure everyone knows. Also has angst.

Eve, Alex's lil sister, is an edgy teen who's failing calc and runs a queer book club

together, they're a weird lil dysfunctional family

I'll be honest. There's a lot of love in this story. From me and among the characters. The characters love each other, and I think the readers love them, too.

It touches on a lot of loneliness--inspired by how I've felt since Covid started--and a lot of the conflicting emotions that come with being gay. What happy endings do we deserve? What about happy middles?

It's a touching book about learning to be a better person and finding people who love you--platonically and romantically.

Here are some of my fave parts:

And then there was a streak of gray hair that shocked Alex. A streak of gray hair off to the side, nestled close to a salt and pepper beard. Textured hands held cocktails. Little, subtle lines creased when mouths laughed. Alex held his breath. On the packed floor, they were the only people Alex could see. They were laughing and holding each other and enjoying themselves, firmly in the place they knew they belonged. Flashes of teeth pressed against each other, disappearing for long seconds at a time.

--

“Sorry,” Alex said. “Your arm got heavy on top of me.” “You’re a little mouse of a man. I didn’t mean to crush you.” “I’m what?”

--

“A dog!” Damián cooed as he sat across from the lesbians. “His name is Yam,” Martin said.

“His name is Yam,” Damián cried. Kris and Clara released Yam and gently nudged him to Damián. Ecstatic, Damián picked him up and set him on his lap. “His name is Yam,” he repeated to Alex. “I heard.”

--

But he couldn’t deny that he was having a good time. It was like intense yoga with the perk of having a cock shoved up his ass. He was going to feel limber as fuck after.

--

“Can I do anything?” Alex asked. “To help cheer you up?”

“You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I’d like to. If you let me.”

--

“Wow this sounds great where can I read it?”

Tumblr @justsome-di

Watpadd @justsome-di

Patreon @just some di (link on Tumblr)

AO3 @justsome_di

Updates every friday!

[queenpiranhadon]

- Love Like You, Rebecca Sugar

I...write for pretty much anything! You can check my fandoms list through the main navigation on my intro post!

Here are the ones I'm most comfortable writing for though:

ᴀɴɪᴍᴇ ➜

› My Hero Academia / Boku No Hero Academia

› Jujutsu Kaisen

› Spy x Family

› Demon Slayer

ʙᴏᴏᴋꜱ ➜

› Harry Potter

› Riordanverse (check my fandoms list to which series I've read)

› The Inheritance Games

› Keeper of the Lost Cities

› The Hunger Games

ᴛᴠ ꜱʜᴏᴡꜱ + ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇꜱ ➜

› MCU

› Avatar the Last Airbender & Legend of Korra

› Lego Ninjago

ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ ɢᴀᴍᴇꜱ ➜

› Stardew Valley

› Genshin Impact

ᡣ𐭩 = romantic pairing; ✩ = platonic pairing, ✿ = x another character (usually canon ship)

ᴀɴɪᴍᴇ ➜

› ⎸ Bakugou Katsuki ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Kirishima Ejirou ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Takami Keigo / Hawks ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Todoroki Touya / Dabi ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Aizawa Shouta ✩ ⎸ Hitoshi Shinsou ✩ ⎸ Todoroki Shouto ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Midoriya Izuku ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Eri ✩ ⎸ Ashido Mina ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Jirou Kyoka ✩ ⎸ Asui Tsuyu ✩ ⎸ Yaoyorozu Momo ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Usagiyama Rumi ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Gojo Satoru ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Sukuna Ryomen ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Itadori Yuji ✩ ⎸ Fushiguro Megumi ✩ ⎸ Nanami Kento ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Geto Suguru ᡣ𐭩 ⎸

› ⎸Kugisaki Nobara ✩ ⎸ Maki Zen'in ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Anya Forger ✩ ⎸ Yor Forger ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Loid Forger ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Kamado Tanjirou ✩ ⎸ Hashibira Inosuke ✩ ⎸ Agatsuma Zenitsu ✩ ⎸ Tomika Giyu ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Uzui Tengen ᡣ𐭩 ⎸

› ⎸ Kamado Nezuko ✩ ⎸ Kanroji Mitsuri ✩ ⎸

ʙᴏᴏᴋꜱ ➜

› ⎸ Sirius Black ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Fred Weasley ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Remus Lupin ✩✿ ⎸ James Potter ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Hermione Granger ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Luna Lovegood ✩ ⎸ Ginny Weasley ✩ ⎸ Nymphadora Tonks ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Percy Jackson ✩✿ ⎸ Grover Underwood ✩ ⎸ Nico DiAngelo ✩✿ ⎸ Will Solace ✩✿ ⎸ Jason Grace ✩ ⎸ Leo Valdez ✩ ⎸ Luke Castellan ✩ ⎸ Frank Zhang ✩✿ ⎸ Carter Kane ✩✿ ⎸ Walt Stone ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Annabeth Chase ✩✿ ⎸ Piper McLean ✩ ⎸ Thalia Grace ✩ ⎸ Hazel Levesque ✩✿ ⎸ Reyna Avila Ramírez-Arellano ✩ ⎸ Sadie Kane ✩✿ ⎸ Zia Rashid ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Jameson Hawthorne ✩✿ ⎸ Grayson Hawthorne ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Nash Hawthorne ✩✿ ⎸ Xander Hawthorne ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Avery Kylie Grambs ✩✿ ⎸ Libby Grambs ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Keefe Sencen ✩✿ ⎸ Fitz Vacker ✩ ⎸ Dex Dizznee ✩✿ ⎸ Tam Song ✩✿ ⎸ Kesler Dizznee ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Sophie Foster ✩✿ ⎸ Biana Vacker ✩✿ ⎸ Marella Redek ✩✿ ⎸ Linh Song ✩✿ ⎸ Juline Dizznee ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Finnick Odair ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Peeta Mellark ✩✿ ⎸ Haymitch Abernathy ✩ ⎸ Coriolanus Snow ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Katniss Everdeen ✩✿ ⎸ Rue Barnette ✩ ⎸ Cressida ✩ ⎸ Lucy Gray Baird ✩✿ ⎸ Johanna Mason ✩ ⎸

ᴛᴠ ꜱʜᴏᴡꜱ + ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇꜱ ➜

› ⎸ Bucky Barnes ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Stephen Strange ✩ ⎸ Tony Stark ᡣ𐭩✩✿ ⎸ Peter Parker ᡣ𐭩✩✿ ⎸ Steve Rogers ✩✿ ⎸ T'Challa ✩ ⎸ Peter Quill ✩ ⎸ Thor ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Natasha Romanoff ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Yelena Belova ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Kate Bishop ✩ ⎸ MJ ✩✿ ⎸ Pepper Potts ✩✿ ⎸ Shuri ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Aang ✩✿ ⎸ Zuko ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Sokka ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Iroh ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Katara ✩✿ ⎸ Toph ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Cole Brookstone ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Kai Smith ᡣ𐭩✩✿ ⎸ Zane Julien ᡣ𐭩✩✿ ⎸ Lloyd Garmadon ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Jay Walker ✩✿ ⎸

› ⎸ Nya Smith ✩✿ ⎸ Skylar Chen ✩✿ ⎸ Pixal Borg ✩✿ ⎸

ᴠɪᴅᴇᴏ ɢᴀᴍᴇꜱ ➜

› ⎸ Sebastian ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Sam ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Alex ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Krobus ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Haley ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Leah ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Sandy ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Maru ✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Diluc Ragnvindr ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Zhongli ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸ Kaeya Alberich ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Tartaglia ᡣ𐭩✩ ⎸

› ⎸ Beidou ᡣ𐭩 ⎸ Klee ✩ ⎸

You are totally fine to request for any of the characters in the fandoms listed, but these are the ones I'm the most comfortable with :)

ᴀʟʟᴏᴡᴇᴅ ➜

› ⎸ x reader ⎸ fem, gn, male readers ⎸ gore/blood ⎸ AU's ⎸ family relationships - ex. Dad Aizawa, brother Megumi ⎸ character x character ⎸ friend relationships (you and Haymitch are best friends) ⎸ character x character family relationships (Weasley twin shenanigans) ⎸ poc readers ⎸

ɴᴏᴛ ᴀʟʟᴏᴡᴇᴅ ➜

› ⎸ smut ⎸ racism in a positive way ⎸ homophobia in a positive way ⎸ incest + stepcest ⎸ sexism in a positive way ⎸ slander to any religion or culture in a positive way ⎸

ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ➜

› If I don't answer a request- I promise I don't hate you I'm super slow I'm sorry 😭

› I will not write any requests I am uncomfortable with.

› Happy requesting ~

[iboatedhere]

(more thanks to @pragmatic-optimist @welcometololaland & @rmd-writes)

---

Henry fiddles with the tap, turning the water temperature down from scalding hot to just piping hot while the biodegradable sponge Alex insists they buy crumbles into nothing in his hand. 

He sighs and rinses the mug before setting it on the rack to dry, turning off the water, and leaning against the sink, looking out into the expanse of their backyard.

“Penny for your thoughts, sweetheart?” Alex asks from the table and Henry turns. 

“Do you think we should be growing our own food?” 

Wide eyed, Alex looks from the strip of bacon in hand to Henry and back again.

“I was talking about vegetables, darling.”

“Oh! Ha! Thank fuck,” he says as he shoves the last bite into his mouth. “Because you know I would get attached to that thing as soon as its little swine-eyes found mine and I could never…” He trails off and drags his finger across his throat. “You know.”

“I do,” Henry tells him. “Would it be enough to turn you into a vegetarian?”

“Hell no, but I would probably switch to turkey bacon. I’ve had enough of those feathery fucks to last the rest of my life.” He stands with his plate and coffee mug then nudges Henry out of the way so he can clean up after himself. “You want to start a garden?”

“We have all this land we're not using and who knows how long it’ll take the renovation permits on the shelter to come through. I have a bit of spare time.”

Alex eyes him warily and Henry pretends he doesn’t notice. 

“I was thinking I’d start with the basics…tomatoes, cucumber, courgettes…”

“That’s zucchini, right?”

Henry rolls his eyes fondly. “If you want to be American about it.”

“Well, since we’re in America. I think a garden would be nice. You gotta be careful though, my abuela had one and she was overrun with vegetables. She canned and pickled everything and still couldn’t keep up. She’d pay me and June ten dollars to go around to her neighbors trying to offload peppers because it was impossible to say no to two cute kids.”

“I’m sure I could find a food bank that would take them.”

“I’m sure you could,” Alex agrees before swaying into him. “Are you okay?”

Henry gives him a smile that must look as weak as it feels and Alex presses his lips together and tips his head to the side, giving Henry his best puppy-dog eyes.

“It’s just…you know,” Henry says because Alex does know and Henry doesn’t want to be the one to say it. 

The anniversary of his father’s death looms, the same way it does every year, but every year there seems to be more for Henry to mourn. 

His father never got to meet Alex. He never got to see how full of love Henry’s life is now. How happy he is. He’ll never set foot in this home or see the garden Henry wants to plant or hold the future children they might have.

Henry’s love for Alex grows with every passing day but there’s still a corner of his heart that is gray with grief that no amount of early morning kisses or late night conversations out on the porch will color.

“Baby,” Alex says, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Henry’s shoulder. He can’t mourn the way Henry does, but Henry knows he tries to shoulder the weight of it even if he can’t quite fit his arms around it. “You know it’s okay to slow down and relax.”

“Plenty of people find gardening relaxing.”

Alex sighs, the same way he always does when he knows he’s been beaten at his own game and pulls back. 

“Okay,” he says, “I can duck out of work early and we can hit up the nursery–.”

“Oh no,” Henry interrupts. “I’m not letting you anywhere near my garden.”

Alex blinks at him. “Excuse me?”

“You, my love, have what I believe they call a black thumb.”

“That’s a fucking lie, I do not.”

“You somehow managed to kill a cactus.”

“That thorny piece of shit had it out for me.”

“Of course, love,” Henry says, gathering Alex’s face between his hands, “whatever you say.”

[duskwillow]

Lingering Questions

{a short tlos fic about alex returning to the fairy palace after the events of book six}

⚘═≖≖═˖✾°•∘❀∘•°✾˖═≖≖═⚘

The sight was devastating.

Her heart slowed in time with her gentle steps. Alex had to mindfully place one foot in front of the other as she navigated through the rubble and remains of the Fairy Palace. What was once a gleaming, proud, and bright structure was now gray, crumbled, and desolate. Despite recently coming back to her senses, Alex managed to put on a brave face as she led the members of the Fairy Council back into what was left of their home.

No words were said. The only sounds were the crunching of pebbles underfoot, the gentle buzzing of bees, a soft flow of water, and the crackling of low flames. All they did was walk for now. The planning would soon follow, and then the salvaging. Memories, items...

Lives.

They didn't know how much they could save from the remnants of this destruction.

The first thing Alex thought of once she returned to the Land of Stories was the destroyed Fairy Palace. It was a brief flicker in her mind before she focused on bigger matters. Alex was a leader. Their leader. Even after all that happened, she knew they expected her to get to work immediately.

Just like her grandmother would.

Alex wasn't surprised when she followed a set path through the palace. Once upon a time, she had taken this exact route multiple times daily. She climbed the stairs, adjusting her steps to avoid the chunks and boulders that had fallen and peppered them with dangerous holes. The fairies knew better than to stop her due to the clear hazards presented. They were nothing compared to what Alex had faced in the past. She climbed those steps with aching legs and an aching heart as the parade behind her slowed their procession. Unspoken acknowledgment of her task led them to leave her be. She deserved to be the first to witness what remained of her grandmother.

The double doors that led to her grandmother's office used to feel so imposingly professional. Alex remembered feeling a warmth within her chest whenever she was allowed to enter through them. However, only one door remained standing, and Alex greeted the bottom half of the reared unicorn with a stare. Anyone looking at her face would have said she looked empty, that there was no emotion in her eyes, but that couldn't have been further from the case. She was feeling so many things at once that her face couldn't accurately express it. All she could do was stare.

Pushing herself to move beyond the first hurdle, Alex finally focused on the state of her grandmother's old office. Shattered glass covered the floor and made for dangerous terrain, but Alex took care of that with a wave of her hand. Her powers were still heightened and magic came far too easily. She pushed down that disdain for herself as quickly as possible before it overtook her analytical senses. Alex was there to assess the damage, make plans on how to fix it, and eventually get to work. But as she looked around the single half of her grandmother's office that remained, Alex could feel the heat and tension of tears threatening to spill from her eyes and stain her face.

There was a breeze from the nearby cliffside, as her grandmother's office overlooked the sea, and it plastered Alex's hair to her now wet face. She had to push it back and trap it under her headband just so she could focus. The wind rustled rogue papers and flipped through the wrinkled pages of open books. Smashed potion bottles were left with very little liquid in them, most of their substances having washed away with the rain or elements over time while exposed. From her small glimpse of things, she determined that nothing had been left untouched or intact. Almost as if her office had been one of the primary targets, it was completely and utterly unsalvageable.

Alex had to steady herself, her hands wrapping around her arms in some gesture that should have given her comfort but only made her more ill at ease. If only Conner wasn't off helping the others with his own section of the Land of Stories World Repair tasklist. She could have used her brother there beside her. While he didn't have half the memories she did regarding that office, Alex knew he'd share in her pain. It was more than paper and glass. More than bubbles and breathtaking views. The memories that used to be embedded within the now cracked and crumbled walls would need to be replaced alongside the golden foundations.

Physical devastation was such a small part of it to Alex. What mattered to her were the times when she had smiled and learned within those walls. Where she had felt like she finally belonged. How could they take this from her? Why did her pain have to continue even after these terrible events? It felt like a scar she had to look at in the mirror. It felt like a wound she would always be reminded of no matter how much time passed or how lovely the new Fairy Palace looked.

Would it ever go away? Would that feeling ever truly leave her be?

As she stepped further inside, Alex could feel her conscience answer her questions for her.

No.

Answers came so easily to Alex when she stood before the remnants of the fireplace. Bubbles attempted to manifest as she stood by, their comforting visage struggling to help bring her peace. How many times had her grandmother stared into that fireplace feeling the exact same way she did? Alex had no reason to feel hopeless. They were repairing the Land of Stories at that very moment, and yet her sadness would not leave her be. Had her grandmother ever felt this way? How had she overcome it?

As if the room held the answers to her plight, Alex continued to look around. While only half of it still stood, she searched it desperately for traces of her grandmother. She always had the answers. She always provided support when Alex needed it most. Even if she returned to magic, her grandmother had continued to be there for her.

So where was she now? Was this not prominent enough of a situation to warrant her guidance? What were the qualifications she needed to meet to receive assistance?

Alex would never get over the dissatisfaction of being left without an answer. Even if she could speak with her grandmother once more, Alex would have far too much to say and far too little time to say it. 'Goodbye's and 'I love you's would have to suffice, but she still regretted so many things. She regretted not asking to speak with her grandmother more. She regretted not sending her letter after letter every single chance she got. She regretted all of those times when they were apart. While, logically, Alex couldn't blame herself, she still did. She hated that she had never grasped the possibility of someone leaving her so suddenly. Her father had left her feeling so many regrets simply because his passing was so sudden, but her grandmother had taken more time with it. There was something Alex could have done to make their time together count more.

A scoff left her mouth, the first sound she had made verbally since arriving, at the thought of that. Her grandmother wasn't the type to really reprimand her for things, but something told her that she would have been severely disappointed to hear her granddaughter's thoughts. She would tell her that the memories they had made together counted. She would tell her that she enjoyed every single moment with her, her brother, and her family. Each second had been precious, and Alex knew that.

She would tell Alex that even though the palace was destroyed, and even though the physical remnants of their memories were gone, they would never leave her. Alex would never truly forget about them, even if she continued living without expressing her grief over it. Her grandmother would tell her how proud she was of Alex no matter what she chose to do. She would have faith in her granddaughter. Always and forever.

Even if it was difficult for her to admit it to herself, Alex knew her grandmother was there watching over her. She didn't need her hand to guide her at every hard turn, because she had enough confidence in Alex to know she would do it herself. She was the Fairy Godmother. She had all the tools she needed:

Courage.

Grace.

Kindness.

Heart.

She could do this.

Giving herself one more squeeze, Alex imagined her grandmother embracing her in one of her trademark tight hugs. Alex took a deep breath, wiped away her tears, and lifted her head. She could feel her grandmother's pride in her through those memories. She could remember her love, lessons, and everything she had done to prepare Alex to keep going. Even through the pain and the sadness. The young Fairy Godmother knew those things would be part of her life until she inevitably returned to magic as well. But she could find happiness. Her grandmother had taught her how to find it.

And with that, Alex turned to the doorway. She left the office behind with its shattered bottles, crumbled gold, and broken walls. However, she had salvaged so much from that room of rubble. She had found the glue to repair her resolve. She had gathered the spackle to patch up her confidence. Alex left with her grandmother's answers to her lingering questions, finding herself much more comforted by what remained of her grandmother's office than she had expected. She felt no more worry about the state of the Fairy Palace. Even if the walls were cracked, the floor was fissured, and the pillars had fallen, Alex made her way back to the council with the determination she had lacked upon her arrival. She now knew they had not lost anything truly valuable.

After all...

Memories could never be physically destroyed.

⚘═≖≖═˖✾°•∘❀∘•°✾˖═≖≖═⚘

[sisiofthemultifandom]

My Massive SHIP LIST

The following is a LONG list of all the ships I enjoy from a moderate to an extreme amount and have probably looked at fanfiction for at some point. Keep in mind this doesn't include every movie and/or show I've ever watched and I may make edits to this at a later time. Godspeed you unfortunate witness.

Agents of SHIELD

Coulson X May

Daisy X Lincoln

Fitz X Simmons

Bobbi X Hunter

Mack X YoYo

Arcane

Caitlyn X Vi

Arrowverse

Oliver X Laurel

Roy X Thea

Diggle X Lyla

Barry X Patty

Wally X Jesse

Caitlin X Ronnie

Kara X Mon-El

Alex X Maggie

Brainy X Nia

Attack on Titan

Eren X Mikasa

Falco X Gabi

Bertdholt X Annie

Ymir X Krista

Levi X Hange

Avatar the Last Airbender/Legend of Korra

Katara X Zuko

Aang X Toph

Sokka X Suki

Aang X Katara

Bolin X Korra

Avengers (MCU)

Steve X Natasha

Tony X Pepper

Thor X Jane

Wanda X Vision

Peter Q X Gamora

Scott X Hope

T’Challa X Nakia

Matt X Karen

Luke X Jessica

Peter P X MJ

Bucky X Sarah

Ben 10

Ben X Julie

Kevin X Gwen

Berserk

Guts X Casca

Bleach

Ichigo X Rukia

Uryu X Orihime

Tatsuki X Orihime

Gin X Rangiku

Toshiro X Momo

Boku no Hero Academia

Izuku X Occhako

Todoroki X Momo

Bakugou X Kirishima

Eraserhead X Present Mic

Castlevania

Trevor X Sypha

Alucard X Greta

Class of the Titans

Jay X Theresa

Atlanta X Archie

Critical Role

Percival X Vex’ahlia

Vax’ildan X Keyleth

Scanlan X Pike

Sylas X Delilah

Fjord X Jester

Beau X Yasha

Caleb X Essek

Imogen X Laudna

DC Comics

Clark X Lois

Bruce X Selina

Diana X Steve

Barry X Iris

Wally X Linda

Hal X Carol

Carter X Shiera

Oliver X Laurel

Arthur X Mera

Constantine X Zatanna

Dick X Barbara

Tim X Stephanie

Garfield X Rachel

Conner X Cassie

Kate X Maggie

Hank X Dawn

Garth Ranzz X Imra Arden

Nura Nal X Thom Kallor

Jo Nah X Tinya Wazzo

Val Armorr X Princess Projectra

Kara Zor-El X Querl Dox

Lar Gand X Tasmia Mallor

Demon Slayer

Tanjiro X Kanao

Zenitsu X Nezuko

Giyu X Shinobu

Digimon

Taichi X Sora

Koushiro X Mimi

Takeru X Hikari

Takato X Jeri

Rika X Ryo

Izumi X Junpei

Disney Animation

Mulan X Shang

Eric X Ariel

Simba X Nala

Tiana X Naveen

Tarzan X Jane

Rapunzel X Eugene

Hercules X Meg

Aladdin X Jasmine

Doctor Who

11 X Clara

Dota - Dragon's Blood

Davion X Mirana

Evangelion

Shinji X Kaworu

Fairy Tail

Natsu X Lucy

Erza X Jellal

Gray X Juvia

Wendy X Romeo

Final Fantasy

Zack X Aerith

Cloud X Tifa

Squall X Rinoa

Tidus X Luna

Lightning X Snow

Noel X Serah

Noctis X Luna

Fire Emblem

Byleth X Dimitri

Fullmetal Alchemist

Ed X Winry

Roy X Riza

Ling X Lan Fan

GI Joe

Snake Eyes X Scarlett

Garo

Kouga X Kaoru

Ryuga X Rian

Raiga X Mayuri

Gatchaman

Ken X Jun

Gundam

Domon X Rain

Shinn X Stella

He-Man (OG Continuity)

Adam X Teela

Adora X Sea-Hawk

Duncan X Sorceress

InuYasha

InuYasha X Kagome

Sango X Miroku

Sesshomaru X Kagura

Kohaku X Rin

Invincible

Mark X Eve

Kamen Rider

Hongo X Ruriko

Godai X Ichijo

Shoichi X Hikawa

Shinji X Miho

Takumi X Mari

Kenzaki X Hajime

Yuuto X Airi

Wataru X Mio

Tsukasa X Natsumi

Shotaro X Tokime

Ryo X Akiko

Eiji X Hina

Gentaro X Nadeshiko

Ryusei X Tomoko

Haruto X Koyomi

Kouta X Mai

Kaitou X Yoko

Shinnosuke X Kiriko

Gou X Reiko

Takeru X Akari

Alain X Kanon

Emu X Poppy

Sento X Banjo

Kazumin X Misora

Gentoku X Sawa

Sougo X Tsukuyomi

Aruto X Izu

Fuwa X Yua

Touma X Kento

Rintaro X Mei

Keiwa X Neon

Kingdom Hearts

Kairi X Sora X Riku

Aqua X Terra

Lea X Isa

Roxas X Xion

Riku X Namine

Lucifer

Lucifer X Chloe

Maze X Eve

Magic Knight Rayearth

Hikaru X Lantis

Umi X Clef

Fu X Ferio

Marvel Comics

Steve X Sharon

Tony X Pepper

Thor X Sif

Hank X Janet

Reed X Sue

Peter X MJ

Wanda X Vision

Jean X Scott

Kitty X Colossus

Rogue X Gambit

Rachel X Kurt

Black Bolt X Medusa

Clint X Bobbi

Bucky X Natasha

Matt X Elektra

Luke X Jessica

Warren X Psylocke

Miraculous Ladybug

Adrien X Marinette

Alya X Nino

Naruto

Naruto X Hinata

Sasuke X Karin

Sakura X Rock Lee

Neji X TenTen

Shikamaru X Temari

Ino X Sai

Choji X Karui

Gaara X Matsuri

Kakashi X Might Guy

Asuna X Kurenai

Tsunade X Dan

Yahiko X Konan

Ouran HighSchool Host Club

Haruhi X Tamaki

Persona

Yu X Rise

Chie X Yukiko

Kanji X Naoto

Ren X Makoto (or Kasumi if we're going with Royal canon)

Power Rangers

Tommy X Katherine

Jason X Trini

Adam X Tanya

TJ X Cassie

Andros X Ashley

Karone X Zhane

Leo X Kendrix

Carter X Dana

Wes X Jen

Cole X Alyssa

Taylor X Eric

Tori X Blake

Trent X Kira

Sky X Z

Doggie X Kat

Nick X Madison

Mack X Rose

Casey X Lily

Dillon X Summer

Ziggy X Dr. K

Kevin X Mia

Mike X Emily

Troy X Gia

Tyler X Shelby

Eddie X Vesper

Marv X Chloe

Amelia X Ollie

Ranma ½

Ranma X Akane

Revolutionary Girl Utena

Utena X Anthy

Rurouni Kenshin

Kenshin X Kaoru

RWBY

Ruby X Penny

Blake X Sun

Weiss X Marrow

Yang X Weiss

Jaune X Pyrrha

Ren X Nora

Qrow X Summer

Sailor Moon

Usagi X Mamoru

Ami X Zoisite

Rei X Jadeite

Minako X Rei

Makoto X Nephrite

Minako X Kunzite

Saint Seiya

Seiya X Shaina

Hyoga X Eri

Shiryu X Shunrei

Shun X June

Ikki X Esmeralda

Deathmask X Aphrodite

Aiolia X Lyfia

Yato X Yuzuriha

Sasha X Tenma

Koga X Yuna

Souma X Sonia

She-Ra (Netflix Version)

Adora X Glimmer

Catra X Scorpia

Star Wars

Obi-Wan X Satine

Anakin X Padme

Ahsoka X Lux

Luke X Mara Jade

Han X Leia

Finn X Rey X Poe

Din Djarin X Bo-Katan

Super Sentai

Ryu X Kaori

Sasuke X Tsuruhime

Chisato X Kouichirou

Shun X Miku

Yuri X Tatsuya

Yosuke X Ikkou

Isshu X Nanami

Mari X Ban

Sen X Umeko

Doggie X Swan

Sakura X Akashi

Masume X Natsuhi

Rio X Mele

Sosuke X Miu

Chiaki X Kotoha

Takeru X Mako

Alata X Eri

Hyde X Moune

Marvelous X Luka

Joe X Ahim

Daigo X Mikoto

Tokatti X Mio

Hikari X Kagura

Yamato X Sela

Amu X Tusk

Lucky X Hammie

Balance X Naga

Keiichiro X Tsukasa

Sakuya X Umika

Koh X Asuna

Bamba X Asuna

Shigeru X Sayo

Tarou X Sonoi

Sword Art Online

Kirito X Asuna

The Dragon Prince

Callum X Rayla

Amaya X Janai

ThunderCats

Lion-O X Cheetara

Bengali X Pumyra

Transformers

Optimus X Elita-One

Arcee X Hot Rod

Bulkhead X Wheeljack

Silverbolt X Blackarachnia

Ultraman

Ken X Mari

Voltron

Shiro X Matt

Keith X Allura

Lance X Pidge

Hunk X Shay

Winx Club

Bloom X Sky

Musa X Riven

Flora X Helia

Stella X Brandon

Tecna X Timmy

Layla X Nabu

[formsofcontinuity]

Chapter 6 is (finally) up!

When we last left off, Kara was just about to take Lena with her to Esme's birthday party. Lena is starting to open up. And Kara has to contend with her attraction, her nosy niece, and her jealousy in a whirlwind day of park picnic pleasantries and sunshine.

Read the whole thing on AO3 here.

A snippet below the cut:

Lena sat primly at one of the empty tables, watching the children giggle and shove with a trepidatious smile. Kara snagged two plates of pizza, avoiding Kelly’s knowing look, and made a beeline for Lena–only to be beaten by her own niece, who slipped guilelessly onto the bench beside the brunette and plastered herself to Lena’s side. 

Lena startled at the sudden contact, looking down at her young assailant with a combination of confusion and amusement. 

“Oh. Hello?”

“Hi! We haven’t met yet. I’m Esme.” The girl grinned. “This is my party! Who are you?”

Kara begrudgingly sat down across from Lena, eyeing her stolen seat, as the other woman turned her body to fully face the small child, sticking out her hand in greeting.

“I’m Lena.” She hesitated, casting Kara a sidelong glance. “Kara’s friend. Happy birthday, Esme. It’s wonderful to meet you.” 

Esme shook Lena’s hand, parroting in the most grown up voice she could muster, “Nice to meet you, too, Ms. Lena.” Then she cocked her head, genuine curiosity coloring her expression. “Are you friends like Mommy and Mama used to be friends before they got married or are you friends like me and Penny are friends? 

“Esme!” Kara squeaked, her face flushing with embarrassment. Lena pointedly kept her eyes on Esme, but, unless Kara was very mistaken, her cheeks were dusting a light pink, too. 

“I’m pretty sure we’re friends like you and Penny.”

“Pretty sure?” Esme’s face was pure innocence, but there was a slyness to her voice that Kara recognized as Alex’s influence. If her sister had put the girl up to this, Kara was going to kill her.

Lena smirked and cast a sidelong glance at Kara, before returning her attention to the girl. “Well, I wouldn’t want to assume what kind of friendship you and Penny have,” she responded cheekily. Esme giggled. “Kara and I have only known each other for a few weeks, but I’d like to think we’re friends.” 

“We definitely are.” Kara piped up, sounding a little too enthusiastic to her own ears. Both Lena and Esme turned to look at her. She ducked her head and made a big show of taking an excessively large bite of pizza.

“Good to know.” A little smile played around Lena’s lips, but her expression was otherwise unreadable.

Esme shrugged. “Okay!” 

Esme dug into her pizza, but peppered Lena with questions between bites. Far from being bothered by her pint-sized inquisitor, Lena responded in kind and, although Kara was trying hard to be normal about observing their interaction, she had a feeling she was failing miserably. 

Kara had always approached her niece and other children in a boisterous, childlike way, regaling them with goofy antics and enthusiastically participating in their make believe and games. Kids loved her and wanted to play with her. She was, objectively, good with kids. But…Lena was, too. She was quiet and attentive, treating Esme’s often disjointed or non sequitur stories with the gravitas of an adult conversation, then following up with earnest questions: And what was the color of the cute dog by the water fountain? Was he all brown or with spots? Oh, little flecks of white and gray over the brown with fluffy tufts of fur? I’ve always been more of a cat person, but I bet he’s a nice dog. Do you have any pets, Esme? What’s the funniest thing that’s happened to you at school this week? What’s the best part about getting older? 

Esme took in each of Lena’s questions with precious sincerity and responded with a flurry of chatter.  By the time the little girl had finished her pizza and was collecting her plate and napkin for the trash and scampering off, Kara was practically a puddle. She had never seen anything as adorable in her life as Lena Luthor engaged in deep conversation with a seven-year-old. 

"What?"

Kara looked up sharply, meeting Lena's questioning gaze across the table. "What?" she echoed dumbly. 

"You have a funny look on your face." Lena leaned forward, tone quieting with concern. "Is everything okay?"

"Oh!" Kara laughed nervously. Busted. "Everything is totally fine. I just… You're really good with her."

Lena’s mouth curled into a small smile. "I can't decide if that's a compliment or you're surprised a Luthor could ever be good with children."

Kara licked her lips. She had no choice but to be direct. "A compliment."

Lena was definitely blushing now. She locked eyes with Kara, held her gaze. "There seem to be a lot of those lately, Ms. Danvers. What's a girl to think?"

The rabble of the park, the children at play, the family and friends talking around them–everything dulled to a gentle hum as Kara's senses laser focused onto the woman across from her, not really all that far away, actually, just the table between them. Her eyes were a deep green, a mossy hue made more brilliant by the early summer lush of the park around them. Kara got lost for a moment, forgetting that Lena had asked her a question, had asked her–not in so many words, but in what passed between her words–to confirm that there was something happening between them. Lena was flirting. Kara was almost sure of it, and the brunette was now looking up from under her lashes as she watched Kara’s face. Kara needed to respond, needed to convey to the heiress that she was open to whatever this was, open to her, open to the possibility that–

"Auntie Kara! Auntie Kara!" Esme barreled into Kara from behind, practically knocking her off the bench. Kara’s arms pinwheeled as she grabbed the table for support. Lena burst out laughing, expression fond but slipping back to something friendly yet neutral as Kara's attention was drawn to her boisterous niece. "Come bounce in the bounce house with me. Pleeeeeaaaassse!"

[threehours-aday]

hiya, folks!

i'm not new to tumblr, but i might be new to you, so here's a tiny bit 'bout myself:

i go by minee (pronounced the same as meanie) but you can also call me min, allie, or plainly alex

you may find me on social as alexander phung, which is my pen name, but i don't actually like being referred to by that

i am still underage at this moment, so no nsfw contents (and no sex jokes, if you may; i've had quite enough of those)

my fandoms: mcu, broadchurch, x-men (film series), good omens, wilde (1997), sherlock holmes (downey films), sherlock (bbc), harry potter

my favourite artists/actors so we can hype together: james mcavoy, benedict cumberbatch, jude law, michael sheen, david tennant, tom hiddleston, robert downey jr., anya taylor-joy, bitter ruin (band), exo (boy band), seventeen (boy band), billie eilish, finneas, lorne balfe

i love rice because i am asian, but i eat more pasta than rice tbh

i was one of those twelve-year-olds on wattpad

i don't take requests

i adore some pairings more than others:

mcu: stuckony, ironstrange/strangeiron, frostiron, pepperony, clintasha, black pepper, strike team delta, spideypool

broadchurch/masters of sex: bill masters/alec hardy, alec hardy/ellie miller

x-men: cherik, cherigan, jeanororo

good omens: ineffable husbands, vinylatte, ineffable bureaucracy

wilde (1997): robbie ross/john gray

sherlock holmes/sherlock: johnlock, mystrade

harry potter: drarry, dramione, krumione, pansmione, blairon

i also have some no-goes:

mcu: st*rker, iron w*tch

x-men: ch*ven, max*cest, myst*to

harry potter: lup*rry, h*rbus, h*rrius

sherlock: h*lmescest

list of my works by fandom and language

1, broadchurch/masters of sex

of unburnt toast and unmicrowaved tea (🇬🇧)

no more apples (🇬🇧)

frigid (pull me down) (🇬🇧)

2, marvel cinematic universe

series: the things i let die (and what else i find) (🇬🇧)

needles and pinches

child in a seacave (cold, cold, cold)

beware (it's heading our way)

nếu mai này mình không thức giấc (🇻🇳)

3, wilde (1997)

smitten (loved) (🇬🇧)

4, good omens

angel (🇬🇧)

5, x-men (film series)

antartica (🇬🇧)

6, sherlock

demolished (🇬🇧)

7, original works

tối qua lạnh một ý thơ nhạt nhoà (🇻🇳)

give me love, give me pain (🇻🇳)

yours (🇬🇧)

enquiry of us (🇬🇧)

trên bờ sóng vỗ (🇻🇳)

[jobrookekarev]

Can You Say Dada's Name?

Chapter: One of One

Date: March 3rd - April 23nd, 2023

Words: 4,807

Summary: Luna runs up to Alex and calls him Dada, singing Daddy as well. While Jo stands there blindsided. Alex realizes Luna might be his and Jo takes her and runs off before she can tell him otherwise. Then they both have to unsay and unhear that one word.

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy.

Relationship: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson (Past)

Characters: Alex Karev, Jo Wilson, Meredith Grey, Atticus Lincoln, and Luna Wilson.

Rating: General Audiences.

Additional Tags: Angst, not a single happy moment, deaf, sign language, arguing, heartbreak, divorce. 

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

AN: I was listing to Exile on repeat while writing this. It was going to be the title, but I liked the other one better. Do you really want to know where I was April 29th? Posting this for you all! So get wrecked bitches! 😘

……………………………………………………………………

“Dada, Dada,” Luna babbled as she signed Dada as well, while Jo tried not to roll her eyes.

“What about Mama?” Jo said as she signed Mama to her two-year-old daughter and sang to the tune of Ms. Rachel. “Mama, Mama can you say Mama’s name?”

They were walking into the hospital and Jo was holding Luna rather than using the stroller. She just wanted some extra snuggles with her daughter. Her daughter had been babbling and signing Dad all morning, much to Jo's annoyance. Luna's language had exploded since she had been fitted with her hearing aids a few months ago. She now signed three to four word sentences and knew over a hundred signs. She also picked up more spoken language than Jo had ever expected. All the blank looks that Luna used to give her when she would talk to her were now replaced with smiles, babble, and signs. Even when Jo only signed to her.

However, babbling and signing Dada was her new favorite thing. It was all Link’s fault. Most inconvenient things in Jo's life these days were Link’s fault. The fact that he was living with her, didn't make it any easier. Although, it was probably just because Scout was annoying Link by saying Dada on repeat that morning as they all got ready for daycare and work. But her nephew was absolutely blameless. 

“Mama, mama,” Luna said and signed as Jo smiled.

“Yes, Mama my little moon,” Jo praised her as she signed Mama back to her with a smile.

“Dada,” Luna said before bursting into giggles. 

“Luna, you don't even have a dad,” Jo said as she signed no dad to her with one hand as she shook her head. “You’re just repeating what Scout says to Uncle Link.”

“Luna Dada,” Luna said as she signed tiny moon, her sign name that was given to her by her Deaf sign language teacher, and Dada in between her giggles. Her smile was shining so bright in the early morning sunshine. 

“You're not dada either, you're just Luna,” Jo said, as she signed her name, but she couldn't help but join her daughter's giggles as she tickled her stomach. “Alright let's get Ms. Luna to daycare.”

Jo walked into the lobby and turned the corner as they were greeted with the morning crowd as they started work. Nurses started their shifts and doctors started their rounds as interns ran in between them. However, there was someone else in the lobby. Webber and Altman were standing together and talking, which wasn't unusual, but there was someone else with them. Someone dressed in a suit, but a pair of old dark loafers. His hair was peppered with gray now and his beard was a little fuller, but he was the same man she knew. He was the same man she had loved. 

“Alex.” 

His name fell from her lips like a whispered prayer as she froze and stared at him. 

Of course, he still heard her across the crowded lobby. Or maybe he felt her eyes or her presence, she didn't know. He was always able to tell when she was close to him. Alex turned and stared at her. For a moment it was just the two of them in the lobby, staring at each other. 

“Dada!” Luna signed with a shriek as she pointed at him and wiggled in Jo's arms. 

Jo was so frozen, so caught in the moment that she didn't fully realize what she was doing as she leaned down and let Luna go. The little girl shot across the lobby and straight into Alex's arms. 

She hugged him as if she knew him and settled into his arms babbling and signing. “Dada, dada!”

Jo had a picture of Alex and herself on their wedding day in her nightstand. It was the one she gave him when he became chief. Webber had given it back to her when he cleaned out Alex’s office. She didn’t have the heart to throw it out, nor keep it far from her. Luna had gone hold of it a couple of days ago and ever since she had refused to part with it. It was to the point where Jo had to sneak it away from her, take it out of the frame, and have it laminated, lest Luna ruin it. She slept with it and played with it and babbled to the picture. Although she called Jo, Mama, and to Alex's picture she just babbled 'ow-ex' and waved around the sign of the letter A in place of his name.

Jo knew she shouldn't have let Luna see the picture, much less play with it. She should have shut it the way and locked the drawer, but a part of her wanted her daughter to know Alex. In case he came back, in case she needed him, in case Luna needed him. He was her third option as a godparent after Link and Meredith. Somewhere in the place she hoped he would never need to be. Yet, here he was, holding her daughter.

Alex looked equally as surprised at the toddler in his arms. Although he held her like a seasoned dad. Luna hugged him. She wrapped her arms around him and laid her little head on his shoulder, still babbling and signing to him. Alex just looked over at her, in disbelief as their brown eyes met for the first time. 

“Dada,” Luna babbled and Alex looked at her again. 

“Hey, sweet girl? Am I your Dad?” Alex asked, looking at Luna in disbelief. 

It was then that reality came crashing back into her. Jo rushed over to them and scooped Luna out of his arms. Before Alex could say anything else she retreated down the hall. She whipped around the corner and didn't realize she was running until she had to stop and catch her breath. Then she went into the daycare and dropped Luna off. 

Jo took a moment to hug her daughter, holding her close. “Goodbye, my sweet girl.”

“Bye-bye Dada,” Luna said instead of “bye-bye mama.” She waved to her before she ran off to play with Allison and Jo let it go without correcting her. 

Jo walked out of daycare and paused in the hallway for just a second. She couldn't believe that Alex thought that Luna was his. Although she had to admit Luna looked a lot like Amber did as a toddler. Even Alex had light brown hair until it turned darker. Both Helen and Amber had the same blue eyes and those blue eyes ran in Jo's family too. 

And then she smiled. Alex thought that Luna was his and it was the funniest thing in the world. She burst out laughing. Alex really thought that she was pregnant, had their secret baby, and kept her from him. He was probably freaking out right now and it was the funniest thing in the world. Because for now, Alex was feeling exactly what she felt when he left. It was karma coming back to him and she laughed because he deserved this. Besides Webber and Teddy would tell him Luna was adopted before he spiraled too far and probably already had. 

But he panicked for a minute and it made her smile. She looked back and heard Luna signing Dada to her daycare teacher as they signed back to her. Then she walked back up to the OB's resident’s lounge to get ready. It was going to be an interesting day. 

……………………………………………………………………

Alex stood there in silence for a moment. He could still feel Luna in his arms as the weight of the little toddler haunted him. Her brilliant blue eyes and a dazzling smile flashed before his eyes. The feel of her little blonde pigtails still tickled his cheek and her voice and her signs echoed in his ears. Jo had their daughter. She had his daughter. He had a daughter. They had a daughter. A beautiful and giggling tiny toddler who smiled like her mother and laughed like he did. Then all of a sudden she was gone as Jo took her and ran. He remembered the electricity he felt as she touched him. Then it was all gone. Now he was back to staring at a sea of nurses at the hospital. 

“Karev,” Weber's voice brought him out of his head as he looked back at them. 

“Jo had our daughter?” Alex said in disbelief, mostly to himself. 

“No, that's Luna, Jo's adopted daughter,” Teddy tried to clarify with a gentle hand on his arm.

“Oh really because that little girl looks exactly like Amber did when she was a toddler,” Alex said and he quickly pulled up a photo of his sister. 

She was twenty-five now but still had the same blonde hair and blue eyes that Luna had. He showed the picture to Weber and Teddy as both of them looked at each other then back at the picture then back at him. “We're either of you around the time that Jo gave birth.”

“Look, Karev, it's not possible,” Teddy said with a shake of her head. “Luna was born by a C-section at 26 weeks. She was on the patient's liver from her birth mom and didn't make it and it wasn't until weeks after that Jo decided to adopt Luna.”

“However, Wilson was always very interested in the girl and kept an eye on her from the start,” Weber admitted, and Teddy nodded in agreement. 

“Did Jo miss work, even for a day around that time,” Alex asked looking as both of them paused.

“To be honest we were kind of confined to our own little pods, but Wilson did miss a few days of work around that time. She didn’t have covid, but I can’t remember why she called out. I'd have to double check the dates but…” Webber said as he rubbed his beard. 

That was all the proof Alex needed as he quickly rushed away. He knew there were two people Jo would tell if she did have his kid. One of them would actually talk to him, thus he took a slight detour and went to see Meredith. However, before heading up to the surgical wing, he snuck around to the daycare. Alex peaked through the window into the toddler room and he saw Luna playing with the stacking cups. She stacked a few cups only to knock them down and shriek with delight before building them up again. Her little blonde pigtails shook with her body and her smile was so big. She was a beautiful little girl and so full of life and giggles. It reminded him of how happy and giggly Jo was when she was excited. 

She signed to another child, turning her head and he saw the hearing aids in her ears. He knew she had some hearing as she talked to him. He thought of everything Jo had to go through without him. Watching their babies struggle in the NICU, Sleepless nights with a cranky baby, getting the diagnosis about their daughter's hearing, and chasing after a rambunctious toddler all on her own. She had done everything alone when he was just a phone call away. 

Luna, he was surprised that Jo picked that name. Jo had always favored older and family names. She said if they had a daughter she wanted to name her Helen or Elana, after his mom and Ms. Schmidt. She also liked the names, Eden and Laurel. She hated names like Banks and Locklyn. Luna wasn't even on her list but as he looked at the little girl now he could not imagine another name for her. She was as beautiful as the moon and as bright as it was. He knew that she was Jo's light in her darkest nights. He could only imagine what she looked like when she was born, even a 26-week-old preemie was the tiniest of joys. Luna was already a toddler, walking, talking, and signing, with a full personality of her own. He couldn't believe he missed so much of her life already. 

“Hey!” Link's harsh voice caught him off balance as he looked over to see him coming out of the daycare. “You shouldn't be here.”

“I just wanted to see her,” Alex said, looking back at Luna again.

However, Link physically stepped in his way, pushing him away from the window. “Not until Jo says you can. Now you need to go.” 

Alex knew that Link would stay there until he left, so he did. It only took him a couple of minutes to get up to Meredith’s office. Although she had stepped down from being chief of surgery, she was still chief of general surgery and had taken over Bailey’s old office as a parting gift. 

He walked into the familiar office and stood at the door as memories of Jo flooded into his mind. Memories of her and him sitting on the couch discussing the time his dad left him in a bar. Memories of her sitting in his lap at his desk chair telling him to come home and do newlywed things with him. Memories of them arguing and kissing before getting caught by the nurses as they made out. 

But it wasn't the same room. It was filled with touches of Meredith's decorating all around the room as well as her messy tendencies. For a second it was comforting not to have to be overwhelmed with those memories, but sad that it was truly gone. His time at the hospital was almost completely erased.

“Hey, you're here,” Meredith said, getting up from her desk and coming over to him.

She greeted him with a warm hug and he let herself pull her in. It had been so long since he'd seen her. Although they talked on the phone all the time, it wasn't the same as being together in person. 

“I'm so excited to show you around and go over the procedure with you. You know we still don’t have a good head of Pediatrics, and the job is always available to you.”

“Meredith stop,” Alex said as she stopped talking and looked at him, taking in the look on his face for a second as her expression changed to one of worry. “Jo has our daughter, Luna. She had our baby and you didn't tell me?”

“Alex…” 

“No just stop, I can't believe you of all people didn't tell me. I can't believe I missed it all. Jo's pregnancy, her birth, she was in the freaking NICU, she’s deaf, and now she's a toddler and I've never met her. But she knows me. She pointed at me and signed and called me Dada. Jo let her come to me and let me hold her. Luna knows who I am, but I had no idea she existed until today. Was anybody going to tell me? Were you going to tell me, was Jo?” 

Alex just stared at her, waiting for her to answer him. Meredith folded her arms and took a deep breath. Alex could tell that she was waiting for something, but he wasn't sure what. This whole thing was so frustrating. He grabbed a pillow from the couch and threw it against the wall with a yell. He sighed and didn’t reach for another, but he couldn't let go of his anger. 

Meredith came over and started up again. “Alex, let me explain.” 

He knew Meredith would use all of the flowery language and stuff that she always used when she was trying to let him down easy. However, he decided he didn't want to hear it from her. He got up, not even bothering to look back at her as he left. Alex went to seek out the one person who he knew would tell him the truth. He went to look for Jo. 

……………………………………………………………………

While Alex was having an existential crisis, Jo was enjoying her breakfast muffin and coffee. She was sitting at the nurse's station as she looked over her schedule. She was also monitoring her first laboring mom whom she had just admitted. It had been a busy morning. 

“Hey,” Jo smiled as she looked up at Link, catching him on the OB floor was a rare occasion unless he wanted to talk to her. 

“Hey,” Link said, giving her a weird look as he raised his eyebrows at her. “So Alex thinks that Luna is his?” 

Despite Link’s look of concern, Jo burst out laughing. She couldn't contain it, it was just so funny. The more she thought about it, the funnier it was. Especially given that Luna was a tiny blonde-haired and blue-eyed baby. Although she did have to admit that Luna looked like Helen and Amber, she had Val's smile and blue eyes. She was the spitting image of her birth mom and not of the Karev family, which Alex would have seen if he had only looked closer. 

“Seriously Jo?” Link said, although she knew he was scolding her, he couldn't help but smile and chuckle as well. 

“I'm sorry, I didn't mean for him to think that,” Jo said as she shook her head, but her smile fell as she remembered the moment she saw Alex. “I was so shocked to see him that I just froze. Nobody told me he was going to be there, nobody gave me any kind of warning. Luna wiggled out of my arms like she always does and before I knew it she was running over to him. I knew I shouldn’t have let her play with our wedding photo, but she loved it and a part of me loved sharing Alex with her. Then she called him Dada like she had been calling everything Dada all morning.”

“Yeah, it was pretty funny to hear her call you Dada all this morning,” Link said with a smile that Jo didn't share with him.

“Luna called Alex Dad and he just looked at her and I knew what he was thinking. Suddenly, I got so scared and I just grabbed her and ran. I finally realized what had happened and what he must have thought after I dropped her off at daycare. But I didn't go back and explain it. I figured Teddy or Weber or Meredith would tell him and then it would all fade into a weird joke. Yet, for a second I honestly thought it would be funny for him to freak out and think I had his kid. Maybe for a second, he would feel like how I felt when he left, when he told me about the twins.”

Link just nodded as he chuckled and she smiled again. “Well it’s certainly one hell of a prank and he does deserve it.” 

Jo laughed again, but she could only nod. Link came around the desk and gave her a hug as she melted into his arms. His hugs always helped her in whatever way she needed them. He gave her one last squeeze before they both went back to work. 

She wasn't surprised when she was interrupted by a text a few minutes later. It was from Meredith along the same lines of the conversation that she and Link just had. Meredith thought it was a bit funny, but that it had gone too far. Jo reassured her that she would set Alex straight. Meredith warned her that he was headed her way, but didn't know that she was an OB, so it gave her a few extra minutes to compose herself. Jo handed off her patient to Carina, explaining the situation and telling her she would be back after she had explained everything to Alex. Then she sat at the nurse's station, finished her muffin, and sipped her coffee as she waited for him.

………………………………………………………………��…

Jo didn't have to wait very long for Alex to find her. Less than half an hour later he came straight toward her. His fists were clenched and he walked fast. He was mad and he had every right to be, or at least, he thought he did. But he didn't. She set her teeth as she stared daggers at him. She was the one who was allowed to be angry at him. And she’s so unbelievably angry that she wanted to slam the tablet she was holding onto the counter until it broke.

His hand reached for her, to drag her away, but she didn't let him touch her. Jo turned and walked away before she slipped into an empty room. It was a bit of privacy, even though she knew the nurses would still be pressed up against the door. Jo turned around just in time to see Alex walk in and slam the door behind him. 

“What the hell Jo!” Alex yelled as he started going off. “You were pregnant and you didn't tell me!? You had my kid and now she's a toddler and you never told me anything! She’s two years old and I missed all of it!”

He let out a breath and put his hands on his hips as looked away from her. Jo ground her teeth as she held the tablet out for him. Alex glanced down at it for a second, dismissing it before he did a double take and took it to read the file. It was Luna’s file, her medical records as well as her adoption papers, and information on her birth mother, Val Ashton.

“She's not yours, Alex!” Jo said in a firm voice as she waited for him to read over it and truly realize that Luna was indeed not his daughter. 

“She’s not?” Alex asked in disbelief, his anger fading away, but Jo’s fire still burned. 

“But I can't believe you went to the daycare and tried to see my daughter and fill her head with ideas of you being her father. Luna is not yours, she’s mine, she’s my daughter. I adopted her during the pandemic and I have been the only parent she's ever needed.”

“I wasn’t trying to fill her head with ideas, she called me dada…”

“She calls everyone dada. She’s two, she called Link and me dada this morning.”

“Well, how was I supposed to know that?” Alex tried to explain to her. “I was confused.”

“How could you be confused? She looks nothing like you, Alex. She's got light skin, blonde hair, and blue eyes. We both have tan skin and brown eyes. It’s a dominant gene. You're a doctor for fucks sake.”

“Well forgive me for assuming that a child who looks like Amber is mine, especially when she comes up to me and calls me dad! She knew me Jo, explain that!”

“She found a photo of us and insisted on keeping it, that’s how she knew you,” Jo said with a shake of her head. “I should have never let her see it in the first place.” 

They both fell silent for a moment as his anger faded away. His anger was replaced with eyes that were sincere and full of sorrow. She looked at Alex, really looked at him. He looked older too, and not just because of the grey hairs. He seemed worn out and not just by the situation they were in. Still, her anger spilled over onto her cheeks as her tears fell and her lips trembled.

“Jo, you kept a photo of us, you told your daughter about me?” Alex said in a soft hopeful voice. It was almost a whisper, but that fire was still inside her. 

“Yes, because I still loved you and I was mourning you, mourning us. You left me. I can't believe you left me. You said that you wanted to be my husband! You said you wanted to grow old with me, no matter what! You said you didn’t want an out, but you took one and you left me! I asked you about Izzie again and again. You told me that you didn’t want to find out about her, and you said you’d always choose me. But you didn’t and you chose her! You will always walk out on me, Alex Karev because there is always someone else. I was just a placeholder in your life until you found someone better.”

“No, you weren't….”

“Yes, I was! You don't get to lie to me and say that I wasn’t,” Jo said as she glared at him, her tears made her vision blur. 

“Jo, I promise you, you weren't a placeholder. I love you,” Alex said, pleading with her to believe him, but she didn’t. She never would. 

“You stay out of my life Alex Karev,” Jo said as she glared at him and clenched her teeth as she went to the door, but before she left, she spun around and pointed her finger at him. “And you stay far away from my daughter. You broke my heart, you don't get to break her heart too.”

……………………………………………………………………

Jo left, the door slamming behind her, leaving Alex standing there. The look on her face was like nothing he'd ever seen before. The hurt and the anger in her eyes was like a fire, despite the tears that fell. Jo was heartbroken and grieving and that swirled together in a dagger of anger that would never dull. Alex wanted to say something, anything, but there were no words in the world that would dispel the anger inside of Jo. He knew that all too well, because he was the reason for the storm inside of her. When he learned that she kept the pictures of them and she let her daughter have one, it gave him hope. Hope that quickly vanished when he learned that it was only because she was heartbroken by his letter. 

Alex walked back down the hall and his feet took him to the daycare. He couldn’t resist peeking into the windows to see Luna one last time. He quickly scanned the room before he saw her, sitting in Jo’s lap. Jo was sitting on the floor with Luna in the corner of the room away from the chaos of the other toddlers. Jo didn’t speak very much, she just signed to Luna. Luna pulled out the photo of them from under her shirt. Jo gave her a sad smile as she took it and put it away. There was a sadness across both of their faces and he hated that he was the cause of it again. The hurt that he caused when he left was still affecting her and the daughter she had without him. 

He can see Jo in Luna, in the fire in her eyes, her determination, her smile, and her happiness. She's every bit Jo’s daughter and he couldn't help but smile because this was all the things he wanted for her. He wanted her to have a child. Even though she was hesitant about kids for almost their entire relationship. He knew when he left that she was ready to be a mom. Here she was, a mom to a wonderful little girl. He remembered listening to one of the voicemails she left him after he stopped returning her calls. It was the little last piece of Jo that he clung to, he remembered hearing about how she stole the safe haven baby and he still remembered what she said next. 

“You better come back here and put a baby in me, otherwise I'm going to steal another one.” 

He remembered the way Jo laughed after she said that and how his heart nearly leaped out of his chest. He had to physically stop himself from going back to Seattle and doing just as she asked. The one thing he wanted most in the world was a baby with Jo, a family with her. He still wanted that. But that would never happen, Jo had made that very clear. She had a whole life, a family without him. Alex loves his kids and he didn't regret a second with them, but his biggest regret was not bringing Jo with him. It still ate him up at night and he missed her every second of the day. 

So instead, Alex watched her sign to her daughter. Their anguished looks had turned to smiles as Luna squealed and made Jo sign itsy bitsy spider to her for a third time. At least she looked happy as she smiled down at Luna and tickled her sides as both of their laughter filled the room and reached his ears. He tried to be happy for her and he did as she asked and he left again. He broke her heart and he wouldn’t break her daughter’s heart as well.

[theepsteinlist]

"epstein" client lists

florida/LA:

ring leaders:

epstein and gf

r. kelly

jay-z

michael jackson

michael vick

donald trump

perps/victims: (i.e. their victims who joined the criminal conspiracy)

kelsey mayfield

megan thee stallion

beyonce knowles

targets:  pretty runaway rich girls who wanna be ~bad girls~ for a weekend and ~seduce an older man~

epstein was known locally to strippers as mr. brown

nazi blood diamond money laundering:

doc martens

chanel

wal-mart

chick-fil-a

james avery

dr pepper/snapple/green mountain/keurig

walgreens

hp

siemens

whatsapp

mcafee

doordash

uber

ubereats

hobby lobby

mcdonald's

coca-cola

american eagle

nazi pedophile blood money (m)/(b)illionaires:

robert a. eckert

sheila a. penrose

john w. rogers jr

miles d. white

richard childress

jen foyle

truett cathy

david green

meg whitman

john mcafee

alice walton

brian kelley

travis kalanick

mark zuckerberg

tony xu

texas:

new braunfels: ring leaders:

amy allen

sam allen

lori hines

donna simpson

targets: high school kids who just wanna ~have fun~ and ~have a safe environment to drink in~ because "there were adults present so it's safe"

perps:

sergio zamora

bryce parrock

chris allen

travis allen

clayton mott

curtis kostan

travis kostan

calvin hoffman

ashton henderson

hannah jeroswhatever jerosezswki

lisa pickens

rachael lee muschalek

courtney cashion

taylor davis

raelynn haggerty

adam sheldon

devin kelley

zach rhoades

ryan walker

taylor akins

samantha rich

stephanie gawlik

charlie miffleton

chris tysdal

ross johnson

reed edwards

paige beyer

landre nattinger

aubrie iverson

andrew shafer

matt durbin

spencer jergins

clint whitley

tim word

chad laborde

chez council

"victims"? (participants with a wide spectrum of consent that were nonetheless assaulted/exploited)

maggie osborne

esmerelda ??? (zapatos?)

liz perez

autumn reno

angel ??? (bustos?)

destiney sheldon

katie turpin

kiki grossman

lauren laborde

lindsay smith

stephen lupton

landre nattinger

ashton henderson

hannah jerosewzski

kkk:

ring leaders:

david duke

greg abbott

ken paxton

vance lesseig

walton family

taylor swift

david green

perps:

james reno

edwin braun

marisol padilla

chuck kirchhof

tom muschalek

dunno mr. zeitler's name

aforementioned men's wives

oakwood baptist church of new braunfels

community bible church of new braunfels

vance langley

coach schmidt

coach mclean

mrs. lindsay

ms. pradervand

mr. baker

mr. trollinger

mr. ??? (other NBHS short term criminal justice teacher in 2009)

officer broussard

shelby lesseig

rachael lee muschalek

kelsey mayfield

henry desroches

thomas neupert

michael brennan

mark hardiman

dr. hardiman

sam allen

judge and mrs. gray

targets: young teenagers that were ~special~, i.e. identified by the duke talent program

victims:

sam coronado

samantha allen

mitchell ridsdale

aaron criddle

ben turrubiates

akash motani

faizal khan

sterling demasters

zach mares

ethan poulter

jordan thiem

edward stockwell

anthony castilleja

charles tandy

jonathan dockall

emily brandon

lauren knipe

heather brown

josh burlison

the trix family

the piranha family

gavon payne

emma roddy

alison kim

sarah perrilloux

amanda and mary pike

sarah stiponavich

stephen phipps

allie alcala

jeremy priest

jackson faires

alex mott

marco martinez

brandon anderson

scott antoine

amber antoine

star hernandez

jessica atwell

rylee young

jamie hand

suzanne stricker

emily langendorff

olivia langley

taylor francis

ana castro

maria chavez

tanner brewer

katie ha

zach parrish

anthony tran

kylie blair

cullen nisson

ranger wallace

taylor mares

kathryne mares

jayme zigler

evan zigler

gracie payne

ellie payne

manuel deleon

the dione triplets

justin and taylor schwarz

araceli ayala

jamie bell

cassie barrett

jordan d'eri

rachel jones

andrew bryant

michael trombold

stephanie bryant

ashley bryant

daniel schroeder

kirsten schroeder

alexandria ingram

julianna pappalas

kindell hardin

edward yu

alexis lewis

katherine davis

ana ??? (katherine's girlfriend, texas a&m track team 2013)

ajay patel

james lamon

emily lamon

dionne diaz

mirea ayala

katelyn warner

kirby fisher

kyle fisher

tyler rougeux

kyle rougeux

josh chappell

kyle chappell

jaimee chapell

emily chappell

tyler mcdonald

marissa maddon

john maddon

tessa loge

eden bonneville

jack rhodes

andrew romero

lauren laborde

sarah laborde

stephenea sotcheff

sophia sotcheff

david mis

britton ware

will stapleton

canaan hoffman

caitie hoffman

sarah kreuger

ben jacks

ben triesch

gabe ramos

gene jacobson

aj jerosewszki

daniel phipps

daniel schumacher

eric stiebing

stephen rapp

maisha rumman

shradha thakur

vamsi vishnubhotla

michael carl

lindsay smith

lindsey kubena

samantha partida

steven partida

victoria rich

jennifer koepp

jenniffer flores

anne manzano

elizabeth villarreal

denise ortiz

kevin korpi

brad arnold

ed gonazles

david eckert

felicia curtis

trent wenzel

coach woodall

coach kilford

mrs. bock

mrs. lopez

ms. wetz

ms. caldwell

ms. biggs

mrs. thompson

oldest batey girl

oldest gorski girl

any other teenagers in central texas that have died in car crashes since 1980 or so

bharadwadj tanikella

hayley gray

colby callahan

austin milam

heath burley

california:

los angeles:

ring leader: grayson bauer

targets: young runaway artist girls

perps:

harvey weinstein

bill cosby

jack antonoff

dr. luke

jay-z

beyonce knowles

travis scott

drake

janelle monae

megan thee stallion

erykah badu

mark oliver everett

metallica

marina diamandis

breandan urie

lorde

victims: (ranging from financial abuse to outright sex trafficking)

grimes

ellie goulding

rina sawayama

billie eilish

shakira

avril lavigne

amy lee

ky voss

poppy

christine and the queens

cupcakke

K.I.D

la roux

kreayshawn

chloe chaidez

tove styrke

tove lo

bebe rexha 

ximena sarinana

angel haze

azaelia banks

ashnikko

colbie caillat

charli xcx

kim petras

kacey musgraves

mia rodriguez

melanie martinez

jazmin bean

ivy levan

iggy azaelia

alice glass

cardi b

nicki minaj

hana

tatu

boa

charlotte sometimes

meiko

lana del rey

borns

mo

sky ferreira

florence and the machine

sarah jaffe

alex winston

jessica hernandez

tegan and sara

caitlin rose

LP

ralph

alice merton

miguel

hailey williams

emily king

rett madison

king mala

leikeli47

princess nokia

post malone

k.flay

sirah

sir babygirl

caroline polachek

yaeji

moses sumney

glasser

king princess

dorian electra

lil nas x

slayyyter

phoebe bridgers

harry styles

alicia keys

lil mariko

carrie underwood

kelly clarkson

mount moriah

zz ward

miranda lambert

the chicks

beyonce

frank ocean

chance the rapper

kesha

MNDR

ariana grande

britney spears

christina aguilera

alessia cara

mac demarco

ghost

juanes

weezer

sam fender

jason isbell

mexican institute of sound

la perla

gera mx

royal blood

st. vincent

white reaper

YB

biffy clyro

the chats

off!

PUP

corey taylor

cage the elephant

vishal dadlani

divine

shor police

diet cig

flatbush zombies

dj scratch

ha*ash

jose madero

moses sumney

j balvin

chase & status

backroad gee

the neptunes

jon pardi

sebastian

portugal. the man

aaron beam

volbeat

the hu

tomi owo

phoebe bridgers

miley cyrus

watt

elton john

yo-yo ma

robert trujillo

chad smith

dave dahan

mickey guyton

dermot kennedy

mon laferte

igor levit

my morning jacket

pg roxette

darius rucker

chris stapleton

tresor

goodnight, texas

idles

imelda may

chery glazerr

izia

kamasi washington

rodrigo y gabriela

kimbra

d'angelo

worked with grayson, benefitted from him, but were not aware anything was going on or did their best to help:

st. lucia

tame impala

the hush sound

straylight run

anamanaguchi

the naked and famous

bastille

blue october

guster

old 97's

frank turner

awolnation

sea wolf

my chemical romance

atreyu

avenged sevenfold

greenday

blink-182

slipknot

blaqk audio

AFI

fall out boy

young the giant

san francisco:

ring leaders:

marc benioff

elon musk

travis kalanick

evan spiegel

steve jobs

jeff bezos

mark zuckerberg

steve chen

bill gates

michael dell

ren zhengfei

eoghan mccabe

secondary: grayson bauer using this circle for remote revenge crypto shills from 20mission and burning man preying on runaways as well

targets: queer tech-inclined teenagers

perps:

zach snow

dan granquist

jeremy whittington

taran patel

jim spagnola

seth tager

walter harley

jose garcia

connor cook

andrew zigler

chris sullivan

"anna lytical" (billy)

kelsey mayfield

caroline rhoades

henry desroches

mark hardiman

ben angel

ian coldwater

"belgium solanas" (michael troy judd)

meagan clawges

nalini prakash

lovi yu

peeyush aggarwal

victims:

matthew allen

samantha allen

janus rose

c boucher

chelsea manning

keffals

ben turrubiates

emily johnston

gavon payne

jamie delton

chris koch

amanda le

naomi wu

tux pacific

sev welker

alison kim

cara mazzi

ruby ??? (caroline's old roommate)

nick ??? (caroline's ex-boyfriend)

rachel forbes

daphne gunawan

trisha day

sidney powell

srijita mori

rebecca ??? (srijita's partner)

scott conger

erin nielsen

qinlin chen (catherine chen)

hank yang

kevin ren

aaron wong

matt hwang

chloe cauley

zane witherspoon

ana garcia

jeremy cruz

john lewis

lida wang

waylon clanton

wyatt clanton

tyler mcdonald

jasmine christiansen

new york/london/vegas && norcal/socal rivalries

ring leaders:

bernie madoff

jack antonoff

joanne rowling

evan spiegel

fox news, et al

new york times, et al

washington post, et al

the guardian, et al

noah pentecost

mark zuckerberg

jp morgan/chase bank/etrade

viacom

verizon

disney

scientologists

perps/profiteers:

lin manuel-miranda

bari weiss

sarah jeong

juliette sieve

ravi gill

will yang

jesse yang

sahil bhumi

???? (their armenian friend from stanford 2012 class)

antonis kartanapis

marko salkovic

erykah badu

oakstop coworking space

wag dogsitting app

kent from youtube & his sri lankan sugar mama

gabriella from wag

stephenie meyer

"e.l. james"

john green

hank green

susan collins

meg cabot

angela santomero

john kricfalusi

tom cruise

george r. r. martin

david benioff

targets: expressive, artistic teenagers envied by big money bankers and "feminist" writers

victims:

tori holland

janus rose

andrew bryant

daniel schroeder

max parks

amanda le

kelsey mayfield

samantha allen

josh burlison

ben turrubiates

henry desroches

nico ??? (from shippo)

sev welker

rachael kauffman

janelle monae

kim petras

scarlett ??? (my friend in the london club scene)

james sampson

james twigg

james sanchez

maria nunez

young asian women, age 18 - 22, going to raves and to vegas (i.e. "asian baby girls")

john lewis

lida wang

katie holmes

stacy london

carrie brownstein

boston

ring leaders:

richard stallman

steven pinker

mark zuckerberg

targets:

queer software engineers

perps:

priscilla chan

victims:

amanda le

samantha allen

josh burlison

jamie delton

jamie hand

katie ha

emily johnston

chris koch

cara mazzi

jasmine christiansen

mark hardiman

chicago && washington dc

ring leaders:

barack obama

rahm emanuel

beyonce knowles

joe biden

targets: pretty, light skinned, liberal teenagers interested in politics

victims:

samantha allen

emily brandon

lauren knipe

andrew zigler

andrew bryant

michael trombold

carissa nietzche

cassie barrett

jordan d'eri

haley gray

ben turrubiates

jose garcia

ana garcia

victoria benson

cj dehart

austin scarborough

stephen lupton

michael morton

michelle moon

jeff stevens

becky pickert

ashton nicole casey

carter freeman

[cauliflowertree]

┊͙ ˘͈ᵕ˘͈ ABOUT ME—

basic:

: ̗̀➛ my name is fern — i’m fine with any nickname or pet names too & my pronouns are she / her.

: ̗̀➛ i’m twenty one & i’m at university.

: ̗̀➛ my big 3 are aquarius sun, scorpio moon and libra rising. i’m an infp too. and i think i’m type 4w5.

: ̗̀➛ i love to travel and do so whenever i can afford it. next on the list is morocco.

: ̗̀➛ i really like vogue—lots of my posters are cut outs from their magazines.

: ̗̀➛ i love to read, write, sing, play piano, guitar & ukulele, journal, listen to music, make lists & give presents. i’ve also recently started to teach myself crochet !!

: ̗̀➛ i talk too much. i ramble. i talk through movies. but if you want to chat, i’m more than happy to! my inbox & dms are always open <3

currents:

: ̗̀➛ currently reading: stay close and the book of english magic.

: ̗̀➛ currently watching: pretty little liars and unforgotten.

: ̗̀➛ currently listening to: noah kahan.

: ̗̀➛ current hyperfixations: my crochet blanket and coffee eating list.

favs:

: ̗̀➛ movies/tv—pride & prejudice, sense & sensibility, about time, interstellar, the martian, you’ve got mail, corpse bride, howl’s moving castle, spirited away, charlotte gray, a room with a view, the woman in black, love rosie, how to train your dragon, fleabag, reign, gilmore girls, the office, the mentalist.

: ̗̀➛ books—pride & prejudice, madame bovary, little women, the man without a shadow, northanger abbey, jane eyre, a room with a view, we were liars, everything everything, atonement.

: ̗̀➛ people—my grandad, @velvetcloxds, alex turner, bill nighy, anya taylor-joy, lucy hale, timothée chalamet, florence welch. MY BOYFRIEND.

: ̗̀➛ music—red hot chili peppers, the strokes, arctic monkeys, last shadow puppets, radiohead, miles kane, blossoms, inhaler, pulp, franz ferdinand, the cure, sam fender, david bowie, johnny cash, elvis presley, the beatles, nirvana, wallows, cigarettes after sex, gregory alan isakov, noah kahan novo amor, syml, hozier, lana del ray.

[feverinfeveroutfic]

eerie inhabitants | chapter twelve

*had d.n.r. (do not resuscitate) on loop writing this one; quite the experience 🔥

I thought about what Rob’s grandmother had said as Abby and I watched the sunrise together with our cups of tea. I had wanted a cup of coffee instead, but as far as I could tell, there was nothing in the house that resembled to coffee or even so much as a French press for coffee. Nevertheless, I welcomed the taste and the kick of the tea as we gazed up to the sky: the deep violet tapestry over us began to give way to a lighter shade of purple as well as soft blue. It would be some time before the sun rose up over the hillsides on the eastern side of the valley before us, but we could still take the shape of its influence on the brand-new day, however.

She and I had taken our seats on the front step with the teacups rested on our laps: I could hardly shake the dream from earlier. The mere thought of being possessed made my skin itch. It also made me all the more aware of my own body. The thought of a new spirit climbing into my body when I least expected it sent a chill up my spine.

I sipped on the tea, and it warmed me up from the inside out. The flavor of pepper caressed over the pad of my tongue. Abby nestled up closer to me, complete with her cup nestled in between her hands.

“Are you cold?” I asked her.

“A little bit,” she confessed to me, which she followed with a sniffle and a sip of the tea.

“San Francisco is awful cold this time of year, after all,” I pointed out to her. “At least it hasn’t rained, though.”

“True. By the way, do we know who in our family will die?”

I shook my head and shrugged my shoulders at that.

“Can’t say that I do,” I admitted. “The tension is just absolutely killing me, though.”

“I think it’s Phil,” she told me.

“Uncle Phil? What makes you think that?”

“Because he shot Alex in the head. Alex didn’t kill him.”

“True.” I paused for a second, and I remembered, through the rush and blur that was that final battle scene at Mark’s house with that demonic head, the ghosts, and the scorpions, that Alex never did in fact kill our uncle as part of his revenge to him. He still had that metal slug embedded in his head, right at the roots of his gray streak. Perhaps it was true. “I am unshakably certain that you’re right, Abs, now that I think about it.”

“I’m certain, too,” she continued, and she sipped on her tea again. “Mark and Rob both think it’s going to be Nana because she’s an old lady. You know, the whole—”

“Oh, yeah. She's old and now it’s like—her time is coming soon enough and it’s probably about to come today.”

“Today?” She gaped at me.

“Yeah. That's according to Lola Cavestany’s prediction, anyway.” I adjusted my grip on the tea cup handle. “She told me that it was come the second sundown, and I figured out that it was today.”

Abby swallowed and she shivered at the sound of that. I shivered with her as well, even with the hot tea nestled inside of our hands.

“Dad could also die, too,” she said.

“Why Dad?” I asked her, to which she shook her head.

“I dunno. But he’s family—and it’s a guess, too.”

“You could die, too,” I added. “Or me.”

“Or you...” Her voice trailed off at that, and she shuddered at that. “I don’t want to think about you dying, Mark.”

“I don’t want to think about it, either,” I told her. “But... you know. When I think about it, I could die and turn into a vampire and I could be with Alex for all eternity. If you die and turn into a vampire, you could be with Eric and Greg for all eternity as well.”

“True, true...” Her voice trailed off once again. Her face fell as well: I peered up to the sky, at the brightening shade of blue all above us. The stars began to fade out with the incoming daylight.

I returned my attention to her and the crestfallen look on her face.

“What’s wrong?” I asked her in a low voice.

“Please don’t say anything to anyone about this,” she began. I patted her on the shoulder with my right hand.

“I won’t,” I vowed to her. “I won’t tell a soul about this. And should I die by the sunset today, I'll take it to the grave with me.”

She cracked me a slight smile, albeit a downtrodden one.

“I just think that if I’m the one who dies,” she started in a low, reluctant voice, “I want to get this out in the open.” I finished out the rest of my tea and I set the cup of tea down on the door step, right next to my hip.

“What is it?” I gently asked her. She closed her eyes and turned her head to where I faced the side of her face. She never said anything for a whole minute, such that I could hear the breeze in the trees on the other side of the yard.

“Abby?”

She pursed her lips but she still never said anything.

“Abby?”

She fetched up a sigh and before she could say anything to me, a big light blue car screeched up to the curb before us. The driver rolled down his window: he had a squarish face with long frizzy light brown hair down past his shoulders. He looked like one of the vampires before they turned over into vampires. He wore these thin light brown leather driving gloves and he gestured for us to come closer to the car.

“Get in!” he yelled out to us. “Get in! Get in!”

“Who are you?” I demanded.

“Yeah, who are you?” Abby joined in right next to me; she set her cup down on the step right next to her hip.

“There’s no time—get in!” he commanded. We both gaped at each other, and, reluctant as to who this guy was, especially since we never met him before, but he seemed adamant about it. Besides, if Abby was alone, I would be a lot more concerned about it. But I was a legal adult at that point. I led her over to the curb.

I took to the worn fake leather front seat where she slid into the back right behind me.

No sooner had the two of us had buckled ourselves into the seats when he put the pedal to the metal and we sped along the street before us.

“Jesus Christ!” I exclaimed as I held onto the handle over my head.

“Oh, my fucking god, slow down!” Abby yelled out as we roared down the block. I had no idea where we were headed, especially since he rounded the next corner up and we were headed the other way, away from the familiar direction back to the Iverson estate.

This guy must have been going thirty over the speed limit. I gripped onto the handle over my head. I figured that there was no way that I could buckle myself in there, especially since I had not a single shred of sympathy for this guy. He was going way too fast and he never told us where he was taking us, either.

“Oh, my god, will you slow down?” I demanded. Another corner and we were met with another four-lane road before us. That was when he slowed down to the speed limit, even though there were only a select few cars on the road. The overpass stood off in the distance.

Wherever he was taking us, it would be in a completely different part of the Bay Area. That was as far as I could assume anyway.

“My name is Marty,” he finally told us in a broken voice. “Marty Friedman.”

“Marty Friedman?” I asked him.

“I’m here to get you girls away from the vampires,” he said. “I’m a vampire killer.”

“Wait a minute, I thought vampires were immortal,” Abby recalled from the back seat.

“Yeah, I thought they were, too?” I added.

“They have a singular Achilles’ heel,” he told us as he merged the car over to the far right-hand lane: he was about to take us to the freeway without telling us exactly where he was taking us. “They need blood to perpetuate themselves. Remove the blood and they die.”

“Where are you taking us!” Abby exclaimed.

“Yeah, we’re not doing that if you don’t tell us where you’re taking us,” I told him off.

“That’s for me to know and for you to figure out,” he vowed to us.

Without any further hesitation, I slipped my left foot into the space underneath the steering wheel and I slammed on the brake pedal. Abby gripped onto the backs of the backseat to steady herself. We screeched to a halt: that car was a piece of junk as far as I could tell anyway.

“What was that for?” Marty demanded.

“We’re not killing them!” I exclaimed. “We are not killing the vampires! Especially when you won’t tell us where we’re going!”

“Why?” He leered at me. “Are you one?”

“No! No, no, no, no! But we are not killing those creatures for jack shit. You are out of your fucking mind, Mr. Friedman.”

I opened the car door and I slid out of there and onto the narrow partially-collapsed sidewalk.

“C’mon, Abby,” I declared. Abby tried to climb out herself but Marty hit the pedal right then. I fell back onto the sidewalk: I thought that he ran over my feet but when I pulled them back up onto the sidewalk, they were unscathed.

“Abby!” I shouted after them. “ABBY!”

I glanced around for something, anything. I picked up a rock down in the storm drain and chucked it at the back end of the car. I missed the back window and I hit the lid of the trunk instead. At least I hit it.

“Stop!” I yelled at the top of my lungs.

The last image I saw of her before they screamed around the corner on the far end of the street was her face twisted in sheer terror there in the back window. I thought about what Rob’s grandmother had told me, from the fact that someone in my family was going to die to the fact that I needed to make peace with my own darkness to stand on my own.

Stand on my own because I was about to lose my sister.

“Oh, no,” I said aloud. “Oh, dear god, no. Don't let it be my kid sister, please.”

I shook my head at that and I glanced around the big four-lane street before me. No one to be seen. I had stopped him in that weird corner of the neighborhood where the houses had fallen away and civilization from any of the towns and thus, there was no one else to be seen around there.

“Oh, god,” I muttered. “Oh, god, oh, god, oh, god, oh, god, no. No. No. No. No. No. No. NO!”

I couldn’t hardly contain myself, especially when I had no idea where they were going. A hard lump formed inside of my throat. My eyes burned with tears. I didn’t know what to tell my parents if and when I saw them again. I had lost my sister, and it was all my fault: if I had just ignored him and led her back into the house to be with Mark, Rob, and Lola Cavestany, this never would have happened. I brought my hands up to my eyes and I wept right there on the sidewalk. All alone, no other cars or people on the street.

All my fault. I met the vampires. Had I never met them, we never would have met that guy. All of it, my fault. All my fault.

I lowered my hands and I cried at the top of my lungs up to the brightening sky. I cried out for help, for life, for me to be the one taken under come sundown instead.

A dark shadow on the other side of the street caught my attention. Even from a distance, I recognized the full shape of his body as well as his long jet-black hair, some of which was spread over the side of his face. He took shape right before my eyes, and he flexed his fingers inside of those black leather gloves.

“Eric!” I shrieked out to him.

He lifted his head and he showed his round, milky white face to me.

“Eric! Abby's been kidnapped!”

“Oh, shit!” he declared. He darted across the four lanes, right over the center divider and he stood before me. He gaped at the tears on my face and he threw his arms around me to hold me. I broke down right there.

“It’s okay,” he assured me. “It’s okay. It's okay.” He moved back and gazed into my face. “I know where she went.”

“You do?” I sniffled at that.

He extended an arm to me.

“Here. Hold onto me.”

With another sniffle, I gripped onto his wrist as if we were performing a mountain climber’s handshake.

“Put your head down,” he advised me. I bowed my head and it felt like the ground dropped out underneath me in the form of a vortex. We lifted off of the ground in the funnel cloud.

I swore that my head was spinning and he had only carried me a few feet when we landed in unison on soft grass. I opened my eyes and I glanced all around us.

We had landed on a vast stretch of light green grass dotted with a few weeping willows and some ponderosa pines. I peered up to the sky once again: still that violet lined with dark blue with the incoming sunrise.

“Where are we?” I asked Eric as he adjusted the bottom hem of his shirt.

“The Winchester property,” he replied. “Where a lot of ghosts like to congregate at. I should probably tell you that I was taking a little walk to see if I could fetch some breakfast for the bunch of us, and that was when I saw you there on the other side of the street.”

“Why—” I sputtered out, and he pointed right behind me. I stepped out of the way for him. I followed his point to the stretch of pavement about two hundred feet away from us.

“Get down!”

We both dropped down to the grass below us, with nothing like a bush to protect us from whomever looked on at us. Breathing hard and still crying for my sister, I lingered closer to Eric. He put his arm around me and held me so close to him, as close as Alex would hold me.

“What am I looking at?” I asked him, and he nodded to the sliver of pavement over there.

“There they are,” Eric declared, and he pointed to those two silhouettes on the far side of the grass. Indeed, I recognized the car over there: he was not exaggerating when he vowed that to me. They pulled over in the middle of a single bend in the pavement. Eric shifted his weight right next to me out of nerves: a cold-blooded killer in his own rite and he was terrified.

I directed my gaze over to the side of the property off to the left there, the giant three-story ivory mansion surrounded by slightly overgrown hedges and weeping willows. The Winchester house: I had heard so many things about how that place was haunted, but I never really bought into it before. And yet, after what Eric had said to me right then, I began to reconsider that. In fact, after everything that happened up to that point, I began to reconsider everything that I had believed in up to that point.

I returned my attention to that car as Marty climbed out and then opened the back door. He dragged Abby out of the back seat, almost by the scruff of my neck.

“Come,” I heard Marty tell her. “Follow me. I cannot believe that your sister did that to you.”

“Where are you taking me?” Abby demanded as she struggled to break away from him. He never replied as he shut the door with his hip: with his free hand, he reached into his coat pocket for something. The first thought that ran through my mind was that it was a gun. It turned out to be the car keys, and he locked the car right there, right smack in the middle of the tight turn like that.

“Where are you taking me!” she shrieked. She stopped struggling for a second for a look on at that mansion. “What the hell, the Winchester house?”

“The same,” Marty declared. “This is spook central over here, but it’s the one safe place for humans. Until we can find your sister, you’ll be staying here.”

“What the fuck—he's going to leave her there?” I demanded in a hushed voice.

“Bastards like him think a place like that is safe for a live person,” Eric explained to me without a second thought. “It couldn’t be more dangerous, though—especially with you and her because you’ve been hanging out with us.”

“He said it’s ‘spook central,’ too,” I recalled.

“It’s more than that,” he pointed out. “Like, way more than that. With the end coming, too, there are a lot more demons in there, too.”

He shifted his weight again right next to me, and I returned my attention back to the two of them. At how Abby seemed to relax more right next to him. It seemed so unlike her, especially when she and I both knew about the Winchester house and the lore that surrounded it.

“Something isn’t right,” Eric told me right then.

“No,” I agreed with him. “She’s like me—she’s not easily convinced by something like that.”

We watched them go over to the front door of the mansion: Abby seemed to hang off of his arm like a rag doll as he unlocked the front door with the key ring out of his pocket.

And then it dawned on me as to what he had done, especially once he entered the mansion first. And he was the one who shut the door as well.

“Should we run over there?” I asked Eric right then.

“Yes, but it’s dangerous—”

I didn’t care. I stood to my feet.

It was like everything moved in slow motion. I wasn’t the best runner in the world, but I ran. I ran for life. I ran for Abby.

The only thing that ran through my mind right then was, “big sister’s coming to save you, Abby.”

Eric loomed right next to me as I sped over to them. Whether someone in my family was to die, it was not going to be my sister, and it was not going to be on my shoulders, either.

[15ktherapy]

song time ig

OKAY ONE. I recommend los campesinos they’re like my favorite band. here’s some songs actually— allez les blues, the sea is a good place to think of the future, I just sighed. I just sighed just so you know, broken heartbeats sound like breakbeats, for flotsam, avocado baby, selling rope (swan dive to estuary), death to los campesinos, this is how you spell “haha, we destroyed the hopes and dreams of a generation of faux-romantics”, you me dancing, romance is boring, we are beautiful we are doomed.

that was a lot. oops.

TWO. I recommend how to be a human being glass animals if you’ve never listened to it. it slays

THREE. ummmm. paramore this is why, new album, it slays. oh and also hawaii part two miracle musical. ALSO. peach pit’s album being so normal. ALSO ALSO. the oh hellos. also also also punisher phoebe bridgers.

list of random songs I’ve gotten obsessed with for like a week or two over the past few months. dirty summer mother falcon, sweet tangerine the hush sound, kingslayer baby metal/bring the horizon, gnaw alex g, san fransisco the mowglis.

songs I’ve been less obsessed with but still good. we don’t want your body stars, unraveling crane wives, wake me up foals, when I was done dying dan deacon, cannibal tally hall, burden in my hand soundgarden, pomegranate seeds julian moon, you are the moon the hush sound, she doesn’t sleep anthony amorim, the horror and the wild the amazing devil, we will commit wolf murder of Montreal, stranger you me everybody, April to death flower face, digital silence peter mcpoland, dream song lala lala, skipping tiles Julie, drop it doe eyes los campesinos, acetone vundavar, (plan a) los campesinos, little mouth los campesinos, promiseland MIKA (^-^), never let me down again depachemode, white room cream, spike pardoner, speeding 72 momma, by your hand los campesinos, dear arkansas daughter lady lamb, accelerate susanne sundfør, renato dall’ara los campesinos, rockstar momma, rip off momma.

okay now things I just. think of. the detail delta sleep, the killing kind marianas trench, let’s go to bed the cure, poor george James supercave, fear of dying poppy, pepper the butthole surfers(🙄), beachboy mccafferty, you’re on fire they might be giants (that’s an angry song I’ve been thinking about today a little. aha….), gold guns girls metric, hero badassjackson, cannibal queen miniature tigers, motion sickness phoebe bridgers, monster starset, you’re all scotch no soda sarah and the safe word, honey whiskey nothing but thieves, apollo momma, to my enemies saint motel, dear dictator saint motel, wonderland natalia kills, carrion comfort aeseaes, wine red the hush sound, castle of glass linkin park, end of an empire celldweller, pieces red, make a move icon for hire, lost kitten metric, modern day cain IDKHOW, roundtable rival Lindsey stirling, use somebody kings of leon, be somebody kings of leon, king Florence + the machine, checkmate conan gray, dead girl in the pool girl in red, crybaby destroy boys, say it right Nelly furtado, brave as a noun AJJ, my heart is an apple arcade fire, funeral gray waterparks, one for the money escape the fate, hella good no doubt, lowlife poppy, a good song never dies saint motel, shampoo bottles peach pit,

I just realized I should just made Spotify playlists. what is. Wrong with me. okay tahts it I’m stopppng now cries

[lasclcats]

Iceman killer you made me mad

#Iceman killer you made me mad series#

Sunday went straight to the Regina Cross Hope/Nana Mama section and filled in the exact time the old woman had entered the house and from what direction. Then he took up a black binder stowed between the driver’s seat and the center console.įlipping it open, he noted the tabs on the first five section dividers, each marked with a name: Bree Stone, Ali Cross, Jannie Cross, Damon Cross, and Regina Cross Hope, otherwise known as Nana Mama. It read: THIERRY MULCH.Ī lithe, fit man in his late thirties with close-cropped salt-and-pepper hair and slate-gray eyes, Sunday checked his watch as Cross’s grandmother disappeared inside the house. So had the phony badge on his left shirt pocket. The phony magnetic signs had been ordered online through FedEx Office. The used vacuums in the back of the van had been purchased at a secondhand store out in Potomac for sixty bucks apiece. And behind the tinted glass he was wearing the uniform of said company, a real find at the Salvation Army. Sunday had attached magnetic signs to the van that advertised over the moon vacuum cleaner company. She walked right by his van, barely gave it a glance. The old bird was tough and moving at a surprising clip despite the cane. Sunday had no sooner had that thought than Regina Cross Hope, Cross’s ninety-one-year-old grandmother, came up the sidewalk from the direction of St. Sitting in a parked work van on Fifth Street on a beautiful April morning, Marcus Sunday used high-definition Leica binoculars to monitor Alex Cross’s house and felt a genuine thrill, thinking that the great detective was sure to make an appearance sometime in the next half hour or so.Īfter all, it was a Thursday and seven thirty in the morning. There was nothing I wanted more than that. He’d gutted me and left a dead, soulless man doomed to endless, meaningless movement.Īs I walked, I kept hoping Mulch or some anonymous street predator would appear and blow my head off with a shotgun, or crush it with an axe. Thierry Mulch had destroyed everything I loved, everything I believed in. Is this what Thierry Mulch wanted? I kept asking myself. With every step the horror of what had happened to them ignited inside me all over again, and loneliness and grief and anger. With every step I kept seeing Ali, Bree, Damon, Jannie, and Nana Mama in my mind. Not even the pouring rain could slow me or soothe the agony that burned through every inch of my body because of what had been done to my family. When lightning bolts ripped the sky and thunder clapped right over my head, I barely flinched. I’d been walking like that for hours by then but didn’t feel hungry, or thirsty, or tired in any way. ’Twas the night before easter I trudged aimlessly through the dark, empty streets of Washington, haunted by the memory of my son Ali telling me that the only way to kill a zombie was to destroy its brain. In 2010, he was voted Author of the Year at the Children’s Choice Book Awards in New York. James is a founding partner of Booktrust’s Children’s Reading Fund in the UK. Inspired by his own son who was a reluctant reader, he also writes a range of books specifically for young readers. James is passionate about encouraging children to read. He lives in Florida with his wife and son.

#Iceman killer you made me mad series#

He is the author of some of the most popular series of the past decade - the Alex Cross, Women’s Murder Club and Detective Michael Bennett novels - and he has written many other number one bestsellers including romance novels and stand-alone thrillers. JAMES PATTERSON is one of the best-known and biggest-selling writers of all time.

[martinskis-lydias]

I know MGG was only in the one episode of yo gabba gabba, but in modern family pepper invited the cast of yo gabba gabba to Steven and Stefan’s house and now all I can imagine is Cam and Mitch’s friends meeting MGG

[namusthetic]

The Marauders

"Anything for our Moony."

Inspired by: MsKingBean89, All The Young Dudes

"We can beat them just for one day

We can be heroes just for one day"

( - David Bowie, Heroes)

___

Playlist:

All the Young Dudes by Mott The Hoople

We Will Rock You by Queen

We Are Young by f.u.n.

Beat Of My Drum by POWERS

Freaks by Surf Curse

Money by The Drums

Little Dark Age by MGMT

Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men

Out of Luck by Airways

Who We Are by Imagine Dragons

Remember When by Wallows

Don't Stop Me Now by Queen

Where'd All the Time Go by Dr. Dog

Welcome Home, Son by Radical Face

Heroes by David Bowie

________________

Prongs

James Potter

"Ask me why my heart's inside my throat

I've never been in love, I've been alone

Feel like I've been living life asleep

Love so strong it makes me feel so weak"

( - Coyote Theory, This Side of Paradise)

___

Playlist:

Honeypie by JAWNY

Kick Ass by Mika ft. RedOne

Everybody Talks by Neon Trees

Scrawny by Wallows

Marlboro Nights by Lonely God

Potions by Day Wave

This Side of Paradise by Coyote Theory

Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes) by Edison Lighthouse

Can I Call You Tonight? by Dayglow

Sober by Childish Gambino

Adore You by Harry Styles

It's Time by Imagine Dragons

________________

Padfoot

Sirius Black

"Can't stay at home, can't stay at school

Old folks say, "You poor little fool"

Down the streets I'm the girl next door

I'm the fox you've been waiting for"

( - The Runaways, Cherry Bomb)

___

Playlist:

Come as You Are by Nirvana

The Chain by Fleetwood Mac

Should I Stay or Should I Go by The Clash

Cherry Bomb by The Runaways

You Give Love a Bad Name by Bon Jovi

Bad by Michael Jackson

Pumped Up Kicks by Foster The People

Paramour by Sub Urban ft. AURORA

Parents by Yungblud

Verbatim by Mother Mother

False Confidence by Noah Kahan

Heart of Glass by Miley Cyrus

Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High by Arctic Monkeys

________________

Moony

Remus Lupin

"Crawling in my skin

These wounds, they will not heal

Fear is how I fall

Confusing what is real

There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface

Consuming, confusing

This lack of self control I fear is never ending

Controlling

I can't seem"

( - Linkin Park, Crawling)

___

Playlist:

Cigarette Daydreams by Cage the Elephant

i'll die anyway. by girl in red

Ultraviolence by Lana Del Rey

Crawling by Linkin Park

cardigan by Taylor Swift

Fix You by Coldplay

Dark Necessities by Red Hot Chili Peppers

Take Me To Church by Hozier

PATCHWERK by Sub Urban ft. Two Feet

we fell in love in october by girl in red

Astronomy by Conan Gray

Secrets by OneRepublic

I Bet My Life by Imagine Dragons

________________

Wormtail

Peter Pettigrew

"I'm tired of being last pick

Treated like a side chick

A background character for all of my life"

( - Mad Tsai, that friend)

___

Playlist:

Another One of Those Days by Cavetown

Comfort Crowd by Conan Gray

Devil Town by Cavetown

Swing Lynn by Harmless

jealousy, jealousy by Olivia Rodrigo

Treacherous (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift

I Did Something Bad by Taylor Swift

Little Lion Man by Mumford and Sons

I Can't Handle Change by Roar

that friend by Mad Tsai

Outrunning Karma by Alec Benjamin

People Watching by Conan Gray

everything i wanted by Billie Eilish

------------------

Bonus...

Severus Snape

"I fell by the wayside, like everyone else

I hate you, I hate you, I hate you

But I was just kidding myself

Our every moment, I start to replace

'Cause now that they're gone

All I hear are the words that I needed to say"

( - Lewis Capaldi, Before You Go)

___

Playlist:

Bored by Billie Eilish

After Dark by Mr. Kitty

Don't Blame Me by Taylor Swift

Dusk Till Dawn by ZAYN ft. Sia

Arcade by Duncan Laurence

Heather by Conan Gray

Before You Go by Lewis Capaldi

Only Love Can Hurt Like This by Paloma Faith

Running Up That Hill by Kate Bush

Glimpse of Us by Joji

Dancing With Your Ghost by Sasha Alex Sloan

Infinity by Jaymes Young

________________

Regulus Black

"I didn't have it in myself to go with grace

And you're the hero flying around, saving face

And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed

Look at how my tears ricochet"

( - Taylor Swift, My Tears Ricochet)

___

Playlist:

Control by Halsey

Wires by The Neighborhood

Six Feet Under by Billie Eilish

Cradle by Sub Urban

Blood // Water by grandson

Afraid by The Neighbourhood

Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths

Arsonist's Lullaby by Hozier

Look What You Made Me Do by Taylor Swift

lovely by Billie Eilish ft. Khalid

Two Evils by Bastille

Sign of the Times by Harry Styles

My Tears Ricochet by Taylor Swift

____________________ 🐾

Hellooo!!!

Sorry I haven't posted much lately, university has been keeping me busy 💀

Finally I'm back with a long post eheh

I've been reading MsKingBean89's wonderful work All the Young Dudes on AO3, which I recommend because it's simply amazing, and decided to make moodboards and playlists for each character.

Instead of my usual character description this time I preferred song lyrics. If you are not interested then please do enjoy the playlists, and ofc you can tag yourselves and the character you feel closest with. Hope you enjoy <3