#also I made a friend and someone almost painfully beautiful flirted with me

[watching-constellations]

I meant to go to bed early, but instead I fully accidentally ended up at a rave. This happened within twenty minutes of leaving my friend’s house. Phenomenal. I have several questions.

[procrastinatingsoicanreadfanfics]

And the Gods wished they were me

Summary: Judith knows she should not mourn Athelstan. Nor should she even look at Norse heathens. She does both anyway, because Judith was named after a woman that had only rage and death, and she cannot escape her fate.

Notes: this took FOREVER but anyway, i humbly offer you some judith x gn!reader fluff. This is after she looses an ear bc i can’t just make everything happy. WOWW i haven't posted a fic in months???

this is just for you jack <33

Warnings: gn!reader, norse/viking!reader, judith is not okay (barely mentally sound), judith has a bunch of issues, also at the base of religion (yayy), medieval christianity and ya

taglist: @levithestripper @majesticwren @obsessiveformiyatwins @leithdragon @demon-of-the-ancient-world @alicedopey, @ivarlover (msg me to be added to any taglist)

based on this request | masterlist

It is not good that you practically fall head over heels on your first raid to England. It is even worse that it is the english queen you want to fall for. Judith, wife of Aethelwulf, whispered mistress of Ecbert is a beauty that radiates unattainability.

Were she Norse, perhaps you would have spoken to her. Flirted, invited her to have a drink, treated her to the best of your abilities. You would-

“You’re staring.”

You whip around, only to see your friend Ylva grin at you with a smug expression. Annoyed to have been caught, you put down your food.

“I am simply looking.” You inform her.

“Looking at the queen of England.” Ylva hiccups. You want to retort, but you know it’s no use. Ylva sees right through you every time you’re attracted to someone, and she’s made a profession out of teasing you about it.

“Yes. Would you object to my looking?” You retort, glancing into your cup of mead, pretending to look for something that Ylva knows isn’t there. She laughs, patting your back a little too harshly. It’s her way of telling you to leave this be. That this won’t work.

She has a point, and one that you refuse to acknowledge.

“You don’t speak their language.” Ylva says finally.

“Brilliant point. You’re forgetting about my unwavering charisma.”

This time, her laugh almost makes heads turn. “So unwavering I can barely keep you and Ragnar Lothbrok apart.” She snorts. She’s too drunk to realize that you’re actually serious about this.

“Come on, celebrate with me!” She slurs, pulling you closer. As you make to get up, she lets out an annoyed huff, but eventually, her short-lived attention span is taken up by another friend, and you take your chance to slip away. You feel the eyes of Judith, queen of England on your back, and cannot help but smile to yourself.

In the courtyard of Ecbert’s villa, the noise of the party inside is almost quieter. It’s the fresh air that truly makes a difference, and you finally notice the stench that must be emanating from your raiding party. Before you have too much time to ponder about that, you hear footsteps approaching.

Your hand slips to your axe, ready to pull it from your belt, but when you turn, it is only Judith standing in the courtyard. Alone.

You could swear that the moonlight is making her glow in the night. Gods, if Ylva knew of your thoughts, she would never let you hear the end of it.

“I saw you stare.” Judith says after a few moments, in Norse, to your surprise. Her accent warbles the words together, but they still sound sweeter than the painfully practiced speeches of King Ecbert. There are a few more beats of silence before she speaks again.

“It is rude, you know. Of you to stare so.” She lectures, her hands twisting in front of her.

“Is that why you followed me into the courtyard of your villa, all alone?” You ask her, and you swear you can see a slight blush begin to creep into her face. It’s cute, the way that it dusts her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. It makes you feel better about your pounding heart and most likely sweaty palms.

“You practically fled the party.” Judith responded. She seemed to know that it was no true answer. A rather obvious lie.

You take a step forward, before pausing. For some reason, you expected her to back away, like all the other Saxon women that seem to be afraid of Norsemen, no matter whether they are man, woman or something else, but Judith stands her ground and meets your gaze.

You smirk. “You are queen here.”

It is an acknowledgment and a compliment in one, and Judith recognizes both. Her mouth widens into a smile, white teeth gleaming in the night.

“It is cold out in my courtyard.” She says, and already as she begins her sentence, you know that this is an invitation. “My rooms are much warmer.”

She does not need to tell you to follow her, your legs carry you with or without your mind functioning.

It frightens you that she begins to work on her dress almost automatically as soon as the door to her room closes, and your hand finds hers to stop her.

“Is this not what you are here for?” Judith asks you.

You shake your head. “Do you wish to use me just for this?” There is a feverish look in her eyes, and she looks as if she wishes to rebel. To make her king and her husband angry, to disappoint once more.

But she shakes her head in response, does so so quickly that you almost sigh in relief. You don’t, because you don’t want to insult her.

“You are beautiful.” You blurt out. She smiles weakly, and you realize that this is not what she wants to hear. Judith knows she is beautiful, and you think that a part of that might sicken her. There is a static silence between the two of you, one that grows uncomfortable as neither knows a step forward, and knows that there is no step backwards.

Then, a small laugh bursts out of her, and the tension is unable to leave your body as tears gather in her eyes. You swipe them away before they can fall, as you have done for your friends after heartbreak, pain and injury, and they have done for you. The gesture is foreign to her.

You look around the room, unsure as to what to do with this woman who seems to be so fragile and so strong at the same time. The vanity catches your eye.

You guide her gently, as you would a lost cat, but she follows, sinking down in her chair, hands curling around armrests tightly. Her white, paling knuckles contrast your gentle hands as you slowly begin to pull pins from her hair.

Tightly wound braids fall from her head, coiling down her back. It is a wonder her head does not hurt. Slowly, you untangle them, watching as more and more curls fall down her back. She flinches when you come close to the wound where her ear used to be, and refuses to relax.

“What is it?” You ask, your question superficial. She shrugs, looking up at you from her seat.

“No one does my hair.” She replies. “I don’t let them.”

You nod, your hand levitating above the bun that covers her scar.

“This is only a remainder of a battle that was not yours to fight. An unjust pain inflicted on you, and yet you faced it more bravely than any man would have.” You tell her. She laughs at that, and you know that she does not believe you. A few moments pass before you speak again.

“May I?” You ask. She takes her time to respond, seeming to think through the options, before she nods. You move slow, so slowly that time thickens into nothing, but you are hellbent on doing this correctly.

And she begins to relax, even when you uncover her scar. There is no need for words as you begin to brush her hair. She seems to know that you are trying to comfort her, you, the warrior. When you are done, you feel stupid for a moment, again lost on what to do.

Yet, your hands move on their own. No thought is in your mind, only that what you are doing may make this woman, who became such an undeserving victim of violence, beautiful. And so, your hands weave and twist, and you notice that braiding Judith’s hair is not much different from braiding that of Ylva, or Thorbjorn, or any other of your friends, only that Judith made your heart beat too quickly and blood rise to your cheeks.

She observed you as you worked, her eyes never leaving your form, and you wanted to say something about it, but your mouth felt as dry as sand. Finally, when you were done, her hair looked like that of a shieldmaiden.

You had tried to soften the hairstyle, so that it would not pull on her scalp, and as you added the finishing touch, Judith gave a soft sight. You rested your head on her shoulder, looking into the mirror, meeting her eyes when she opened them again.

“You’re staring.” She noted, a smirk creeping onto her face.

“I am indeed. How rude of me.” You said, turning to look at her, her face incredibly close, closer than you had ever dared to imagine. And Gods, finally, her smile was soft.

“You should have been one of us. You would have made a brilliant warrior were you norse. I can see it in your eyes.”

“My name is that of a warrior.” Judith said. “Not in your sense or definition, but in mine.”

“And that is only right.” You replied. “Though I would be afraid to meet you on the battlefield.”

Judith raised a brow. “Would you?”

“Mhm. You can be so fierce. I was quite afraid of you in the beginning.” You replied, and it felt as if you were speaking to someone you had known for years. Judith blinked, surprised, before her hand found yours, still resting on her chair. It was soft, unlike yours, but you noticed her paint-stained fingertips.

Judith redirected your attention with a simple touch, and you felt yourself forgetting your surroundings. Had the Gods sent a warrior screaming bloody murder at you right now, you wouldn’t have noticed.

“I want to kiss you.” Judith said finally, and you could hear the hesitation, the fear in her voice.

You cleared your throat nervously. “I would- it would be an honor.” You managed, stumbling over your words, and Judith laughed softly, taking your face in your hands and pressing a kiss onto your lips with such gentleness you swore you were not made to be a warrior after all.

[song-writer-melo-wrath]

for mythos: 17, 18, 20-22 because i want to hear more about this evil bastard (affectionate)

[HAPPY STIMMING]

17: Do they like children?

It's not so much Mythos doesn't like children so much as Mythos doesn't really know how to interact with children. He more or less accepts that his “invoke fear with every performance” thing doesn't really click with a lot of kids. Meeting Yenna helps them come around.

“Scared by that story? No? Clearly, I'm off my game then. Another.”

18: Kissing: tongue or no tongue?

If they're given long enough to, tongue in almost every instance.

20: What do they like that nobody else does?

It doesn't exactly come up often, but Mythos has a fondness for jack-in-the-boxes. Also, they actually like the feeling of spider webbing against their skin and hair, and bugs crawling over their skin. Which. Fun coincidence, huh.

21: What would it take for them to break up with someone? What would be the last straw?

At the beginning of the game and before that, it's simply boredom. Before the game, attempting to murder them was also a dealbreaker, buuut Astarion and Lae'zel very much made them forget that. To be fair, at least those two tried to kill him before any flirting happened. If I had a nickel, amiright?

Further into the game, Mythos gains a new one. Needing, or wanting, different things. The fact that he's attracted to people differently is something he was made aware of before the events of the game, but he didn't really care about people knowing. So long as they give him what he wants, it's fine, right?

[sips tea]

And then he realizes, “Oh no, I care about these people”. He's not used to that. Mythos had like, one actual friend before the illithid capture. Well, a lot, technically, since his best friend Cricket is also a necromancer in command of several skeletons and golems. But in terms of living, long-term friends, he just has Cricket. Cricket's sister Junebug and Mythos were somewhat stable, but there was a mutual understanding that there was no romance. It just didn't last long due to Mythos being kinda…kicked out for his own safety. So to be surrounded by all these beautiful interesting people, and then get deep platonic attachment to many of them…

“… Maybe what you really need is…a friend. Not…a lover.”

“I… I would like that.”

It completely changes things. The moment they realize that Lae'zel is more romantically attached then she lets on, they let her down as gently as possible. And, for them, it is gentle. Karlach, Wyll, and Shadowheart all cursing them out before leaving wrecks them more than they let most people see. Perhaps that's for the better. Though they have no romantic attraction, this nightmare bard does in fact have a heart.

[sips tea again]

Anyway, Mythos' last straw with The Emperor was Ansur. Because for fuck's sake, they were fine with it being transactional, but the hypocrisy? The “you should trust me” laced with it not trusting them? They're all too familiar. “You're more boring than I thought.”

22: Do they like being called pet names? Do they call other people pet names? What’s their go-to?

Mythos and pet names can get complicated. On one hand, they love being referred to as a gem, or a bug, or a rat. Really, just call them things that fit with either their love of shiny things, or their ~nightmare~ shtick, and you'll have them smiling. On the other, things like “lover” or “beloved” or being called “mine” or “my ___” are…stomached. Nauseating, but tolerated if they like the person saying them.

When it comes to giving, though. It is almost painfully obvious the way that Mythos desires. They don't like being called “mine”, but they do love calling other people that. So long as they make sure the other is comfortable first. My sweet-ling. My treasure. My pearl. My sweetmeat. Even flirting, Mythos likes to give others the feeling they could be devoured at any moment.

Bastard (affectionate) indeed.

[lemonluvgirl]

Delicious Part 2

Read Part 1 here. You can also read the whole thing on AO3.  

So, my delicious bread babies, here is your much anticipated continuation. There will of course have to be a part 3 to this. Because I didn’t get to the smut yet. But now you’ll just have to sit back and enjoy the wild ride that I’ve written for this fic.

 **warnings for drama, cheating, betrayal but probably not in the way you’re thinking**

Peeta dropped his keys on the mail table as he walked into his apartment. He didn’t bother turning on the light. It was late, and the faint flashes of far away lightning signaled that the night was stirring with what looked like a storm. 

He worried about whether Katniss had gotten home safe or not. Then he shook his head and chastised himself for thinking about her again. 

He needed to stop. 

He had a girlfriend. 

He was not a cheater. 

He was just confused and lonely. 

Madge had been gone for over a year, reporting on assignment in the Middle East and the war on terror. They had officially spent more of their relationship apart than they had together now. 

But that didn’t give him the right to say the things he had said to Katniss tonight. 

The words played over and over in his head, like a shameful soundtrack to his most human and fallible moments. 

“Yeah? You like that? Does it feel…good?” He had asked her, as he leaned in to smell the unique scent of her shampoo and skin. She smelled like fresh rain and wild blooms. She smelled like spring and growing things and the memory of it sent his heart racing again. 

Katniss was unlike any girl he had ever met. So tough, so resilient, and so very… captivating. And Peeta was hung up on her. That much he knew. He had been dreaming every night of her hard won smiles, her quicksilver eyes, and her coffee and cream complexion for the past couple of weeks. 

But now that all had to stop. 

This had gone past a simple attraction. 

It had even gone past a secret crush. 

He had flirted with her tonight, and he was ashamed to say when she asked him to go to dinner with her a part of him had been incredibly happy. But the bigger part of him, the logical part of him, knew that he never should have started down that road with Katniss. 

She was reserved, sometimes almost painfully so and it had taken a lot for her to open up to him, even just as friends. And when she looked at him earlier before she left, her eyes flashing with righteous anger and disgust, and worst of all, betrayal, Peeta had felt lower than dirt. 

He couldn’t explain why he had done it. He didn’t understand himself. He had never been tempted by another woman while he was exclusively dating someone. It had always been easy to flip that switch and turn off his radar when it came to available women when he was unavailable. 

But with Katniss it was different. 

He noticed her from the minute she walked into their first class. 

She was beautiful, but in a completely unassuming, not really trying kind of way. She wore minimal makeup, hardly ever wore jewelry, always did her hair the same way, and never wore heels or anything overly ‘girly’. 

She was quirky and interesting and again, her personality was so unique. A mixture of shyness, and a stubborn ‘this is me, take it or leave it’ attitude. 

To Peeta, this potent combination of extraordinary looks and an even more extraordinary character was like his kryptonite. 

He found himself coming home most nights after his classes with Katniss staring at old pictures of him and Madge on his phone, trying to remember all the little things he liked about Madge.

He usually made it to 16 or 17 items before he fell asleep. 

But when he thought about the sound of Katniss’ laugh, he could stay up half the night fighting the urge to draw her, or worse….touch himself to thoughts of her. 

He hadn’t done that yet, at least. But more and more it was becoming clear that he couldn’t keep lying to himself about where this was headed unless he put a stop to it. 

Peeta cursed, loudly, and kicked his ottoman stool before collapsing into the armchair in his dark living room. 

The thundering sound of the rainstorm outside was churning up more tumultuous thoughts and feelings inside of him. 

Peeta knew he needed to set this right. He had to stop his and Kantiss’ classes together. He could probably ask another one of his colleagues to take over for him…Portia or maybe Cinna. They still owed him a favor from when he subbed as the head chef for their restaurant when they went on a week long honeymoon last year, and he could pay one of them to sub for the remainder of Katniss’ classes out of his own pocket. 

Yes. That’s what he would have to do. 

That, and…..tell Madge. 

Fuck. That was going to be terrible. 

Peeta sucked in a harsh breath, shaking his head at his own stupidity. He had no idea how he was going to explain himself. What girl wanted to hear from their boyfriend that he was attracted to another woman, and had almost cheated? 

At least he hadn’t screwed up completely. He hadn’t slept with Katniss, or even kissed her. But if Madge asked if he wanted to do those things with Katniss he would have to be honest. 

Christ, this was going to be a disaster. Peeta thought to himself. 

But the only thing worse than telling Madge would be not telling her. He didn’t want to add lying to the list of ways he’d disrespected his girlfriend tonight. 

With a huff and a sigh Peeta stood up and set about arranging for a sub for his weekly cooking class with Katniss. Cinna texted back immediately and said he'd be happy to fill in. Once Peeta told him the time schedule, and Katniss’ level of skill and cooking goals, they settled on the compensation details. Thankfully Cinna gave him a huge break on his hourly rate. 

After that Peeta checked the clock and did some mental calculations to see what time it was in Madge's time zone.

She would most likely still be awake, so Peeta took a chance and initiated a video call with her over skype. He watched as the calling icon rang and rang, until it looked like it would go to voicemail. Peeta was just about to cancel the call when Madge picked up. 

“Hello?” Madge’s voice was thick with something like sleep, but Peeta could see she was still wearing her make up once the lighting on the screen adjusted. 

He could just make out the edge of one of her favorite pink sleep tops and even though her mascara was smudged, she still looked classically beautiful. Her shiny blond hair was up in a hastily fixed pony tail and her lips were the same strawberry pink color he remembered them being, even without lipstick. 

“Hey babe, sorry to wake you. I just needed to talk to you tonight.” 

“It’s alright I wasn’t asleep yet, just….thinking before I got ready for bed. What’s up Peeta? You usually don’t call during the week.” Madge asked, her voice curious but not suspicious. 

She was right, Peeta usually relegated their weekly calls to Saturdays and Sundays, when Madge had more free time. They both worked long hours and were often too tired to skype when they got off work. 

“I actually need to talk to you about some-.” Peeta started to say when Madge tilted the screen for a moment as she adjusted herself on her bed and something in the corner of the screen caught his eye. 

“What did you need to talk to me about?” Madge questioned in a completely even voice. 

But Peeta couldn’t answer her. He couldn’t take his eyes off the glint of silver metal on her nightstand. 

Two rounded off rectangles with black rubber borders and engraved writing stamped across the surface. He couldn’t make out the name on the tags at this distance, but he didn’t need to read the words to know what they were. 

Dog tags, the kind issued to soldiers.

“Madge, what is that?” Peeta pointed in the direction of the tags and hoped against hope that there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for why the tags were there. 

But in the next second any hope that he had was dashed to pieces. 

Madge didn’t even have to turn around to look at where Peeta was pointing. She could see the tags in the smaller square image that displayed her own image in the corner of the screen. 

Her face immediately paled. And then her lip started to quiver. 

Peeta looked from her to the dog tags, and back again. 

“Peeta….” Madge said in a whisper that was laden with guilt, and her big baby blue eyes reflected a sadness and self loathing that was all too familiar to him. 

“What the FUCK Madge?” Peeta exclaimed, yelled really. He was furious. 

He couldn’t help it. Here he was, feeling like he was the lowest amoeba on the planet for even looking at another woman and immediately calling to confess his mistake, and he finds out his girlfriend is screwing some GI. And she wasn’t even going to tell him. 

“Peeta, please! It was-I just-it's been over a year!” 

“It's been over a year for ME TOO MADGE! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!” 

“Oh, God, Peeta it just happened! I never meant for it to happen! Or for it to go on this long- I just- God, Peeta you know I’m not good at being alone!” 

“I can’t BELIEVE you just said that to me.” Peeta ground the words out, seething now with anger. 

“We were only together for a year.” Came Madge’s defeated whisper, as she looked away, to a different part of the room. 

“And how long did you wait until you started screwing around behind my back?” Peeta questioned, dreading the answer but also needing to know. 

“Six months.” Madge replied, head down, voice cracking. 

Peeta sucked in a breath. 

Six months. She had been cheating on him for over half a year. 

“Wow.” Peeta finally said, disbelief in his voice. 

“I don’t know how this happened…” Madge said in a small and sad voice, almost to herself. 

“I do.” Peeta told her emphatically. 

“You didn’t respect me enough to tell me when you stopped loving me.” Peeta told her quietly, and in that moment, with those words, his anger left him. Madge began sobbing. 

He stared at Madge, while tears poured down her face and all he felt was regret. They had dragged this out far longer than they should have. 

“I called you today to tell you that there’s a girl in one of my cooking classes.” Peeta said, in a much less emotional tone. 

Madge’s eyes snapped to his. 

“I didn’t sleep with her. I didn’t kiss her, or anything. But I am attracted to her. And I was calling to tell you I was putting a stop to it. I got Cinna to take over the class for me, and I was going to ask you if you’d-ha,” Peeta stopped, and shook his head at his own naivete, and continued after he gave another slightly bitter laugh, “I was going to ask when I could fly out and spend a weekend with you.” Peeta told her and Madge swallowed thickly, before sniffling a little. 

“Bet you wish you wouldn’t have held back with that girl now.” Madge replied with a miserable expression playing about her face. 

“No. It was still the right thing to do. I didn’t just hold back for you Madge, I held back for me too. Things have been off with us for a while. Maybe I didn’t realize how bad, but that’s no excuse. I let this…situation start turning me into someone and something I’m not. I don’t want to be that kind of guy, Madge.” Peeta told her, not condemning her but just stating how he really felt. 

Madge nodded, understandingly. 

“Me neither. I never wanted to be a cheater, but Gale-this guy I met he’s just….I tried to stay away, I really did I promise, but I wasn’t strong enough. I’m so sorry Peeta.” Madge confessed. And even though Peeta flinched when she said the man’s name he unfortunately knew exactly where she was coming from. 

“You love him?” Peeta asked her. 

Madge nodded before speaking, “Yeah, I think I really do. I’ve…I’ve never felt like this about anyone….” She trailed off, embarrassed and ashamed again but Peeta just cleared his throat and shook his head. 

“You don’t have to give me the details Madge. Really. I just want to make sure you’re happy. And that you’re gonna be ok.” He said, swallowing the rest of his lingering indignation. 

“I don’t deserve that Peeta, you should want me to get hit by a bus.” 

“Madge,” Peeta said with a sigh, “I’m angry, yes. Completely pissed. And it's going to take time, a lot of time to get over this. And to be honest, you being more than a thousand miles away helps the situation. But we were friends before we dated. And we’ve known each other practically our whole lives. So I could never hate your guts. Besides, I had my own brush with temptation. I know how easy it is to let one moment get out of hand. I’m sorry it took me almost cheating on you for us to finally be honest with each other. But I’d rather agree that our relationship wasn’t working and we both needed a push to come to terms with that than sit here playing blame games with you.” 

“If we did play you’d win. You didn’t actually cheat.” She muttered as she bunched up her blanket and twisted it in her hands nervously. 

“That doesn't mean I didn’t want to.” Peeta told her pointedly and a small, petty part of him enjoyed the look of anger and jealousy that crossed her face. It fled quickly though, and Peeta’s comfort was short-lived as well. 

Madge took in a deep breath and blew it out slowly. 

“So I guess this means we’re over huh?” She asked. 

“Well, you aren’t in  love with me anymore right?” 

“No. I’m not. Sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry about that part. The dishonesty was more hurtful actually. To be quite frank I don’t think I’ve been in love with you for a while either. I mean I love you, as weird as it sounds. You’re still the girl who taught me how to tie a proper tie, and who finally charmed my mother. But, there’s a difference I think, to loving someone and being in love with them. And our ship sailed a long time ago, Madge.” Peeta said, hoping he was making sense. 

Madge nodded her head though, so he guessed she at least understood most of what he was trying to say. 

“So, where do we go from here? Peeta, you're still one of my best friends. And I’d hate myself forever if I fucked that up for good. Are we friends or…?” 

“I….think I’m gonna need some time. I can’t tell you how long. I just need some time and space to get perspective.” He told her hesitantly. 

“Ok. Yeah. That’s fair.” Madge replied, sadness making her eyes water again but she looked away before he could see her tears fall. 

Peeta breathed out a heavy sigh and said goodbye to her. For now. Maybe someday they could be friends again, after they healed. Madge’s betrayal still stung deeply actually. That wasn’t something he was going to forget right away. 

But more than anything Peeta was exhausted by the sheer emotional toll the night had taken on him. He made his way out of the living room slowly, the reality of everything that had happened starting to sink in. 

The steady pelting of the rain on his window helped to drown out the majority of his thoughts. 

It was still too much to properly process, but as he laid down in bed his last thought was of Katniss and how he needed to find a way to apologize to her before he lost his chance with her forever. 

[angelkurenai]

So much for a surprise - Chris Evans x Reader

Title: So much for a surprise

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: None

Prompt: I'd love a chris evans x reader one shot, where they're dating, and after the knives out movie, he's been spending a lot of time with his co-star Ana de Armas, and like in one specific interview she was getting very flirty and such with Chris, and touching his arm and stuff, and I'd just want to see how you'd interpret jealous!reader, and Chris reacting to that jealousy!!

Looking at your phone, for what seemed like the millionth time that day, you tried to suppress a sigh, though you couldn't help the roll of your eyes. Despite the amount of messages and notifications, and there were plenty for sure, none of them including your boyfriend.

You didn't want to hold it against him, after all you knew he was particularly busy these days what with all the interviews and promoting his newest movie. And despite all the games and laughs it could be, or at least it seemed to be to the rest of the world, you were an actress yourself and understood that it could be tiring, exhausting and on more than one occasions very nerve-wracking especially if one was already anxious about taking on a new role after years of being famous for another one. You understood because you had gone through all of that yourself, and you could have excused his lack of contact. You would have, really, if it wasn't for the fact that those interviews were no longer part of his job and a stressful one at that. No, if anything, they were obviously only an excuse now.

An excuse to not answer phone calls or messages, an excuse to spend less time at home, an excuse to make plans to go out with without you – oh you couldn't even remember the last time it had been just the two of you out for a simple drink – an excuse to pull further apart from you, an excuse fool around and be playful with another woman. It was that last part which brought a bitter taste in your mouth. If it was his friends, long-time ones or not, you wouldn't have paid so much attention to it but when he said that he was going out for the third time in a row with Ana and maybe some costar might tag along but he didn't know then there was only so much you could take.

You didn't doubt him, you would never doubt him or his fidelity to you, because you knew the kind of man you had beside you. After years of being together you how much he loved you, he made sure show it every chance he got and made sure you never forgot it, so you always trusted him even if he more often than not ended up surrounded by so many beautiful women at a time. But that didn't mean you could trust her, just like you couldn't blame her. Alright maybe you could andyou would if she ever tried anything with Chris, but the lingering touches or easy smiles and casually frequent glances were no reason for you to start anything or try to hold it against her. Not yet.

You could very easily hold it against him, though. For allowing all of it, but above all for allowing himself to be pulled away from you because of another woman. It wasn't your fault that you couldn't stop the pang in your chest. You weren't to blame for the way your heart squeezed, a bit painfully sometimes too. It was not on you that whenever he said, in that casual simple way that “Oh just going out with Ana.” as if she was his girlfriend of three years and not you, you felt your throat close up and your eyes burn with something akin to unshed tears. You refused to believe it was tears and you refused to believe that he was hurting you, that this situation was hurting you, when it could all easily be just in your head so instead you shrugged most of it off.

“Hey, we were-” the man started but paused when he saw the deep frown that had set on your face, the concern that slipped on his features was touching to say the least. Especially as he gave a small sign to his friends and approached you. Your friends as well and you tended to forget that lately just like you couldn't enjoy anything good that happened to you because of how things with Chris were but then again you had not shared much of it with him and when you didn't get to share your happiness with him it always tended to feel less true or real.

“Are you alright?” the hand on your shoulder along with the small squeeze and warmth it brought was comforting in a way you had almost forgotten you wanted but clearly more than needed, you realized.

“Just fine, don't worry about me. Going without any sleep for two days in a row kind of takes a toll on you, I guess.” you shrugged softly, slowly tucking your phone in your pocket; hoping even in the last couple seconds that there would be a message from your boyfriend.

“Are you trying to be reassuring now?” his eyebrows rose “Cause you're doing a really shitty job at it let me tell you. Hey remind me again who you've been taking acting lessons from at first? Hugh Jackman? Well it shows.”

“No, I swear I-” you couldn't help the giggle that left your lips, feeling light even for a few second “I am alright, really. A tad tired but only because I had so many scenes today. I recover fast and I have tomorrow off so all will be good. It's not anything I'm not used to.”

“I-” his small smile dropped in the end, worry showing through once more “Are you sure? Because I've seen you check your phone plenty of times in between breaks so I worried that- Well, something might've happened.”

“No, it's- Well, I expected some phone call or message from my boyfriend but apparently he's still busy with interviews, so I might just have to go ahead and meet him in person there. We might go out later... I think. We usually do every Friday so...” you trailed off and shrugged, not wanting to burden him with unnecessary worries and information despite how close you were lately.

“Oh well, in that case-” he nodded his head, glancing over his shoulder for a second before facing you again “It seems like you've already got plans with him then but uhm in case anything happens and you're off early or in the mood for drinks we know where we will be-”

“Oh but I'm not sure if I will have time to-” you said with slight worry and wide eyes.

“I know, I know.” he chuckled softly, quickly trying to calm you down “Just letting you know in case there's an off chance that it happens. We'll be waiting for you either way. I'll be waiting.”

You didn't dare say much to him after that, only gave him a shy smile and nod with a promise to at least try, and him that he was alright with anything, and watched him leave with the rest of your friends before you got in your own car to make your way to the studios where the interviews would be held. For the first time, probably in days if not weeks, you felt much lighter. Maybe it was good to see that you were wanted somewhere, in someone's company even though it wasn't your boyfriend's - despite your deepest hopes.

If only your good mood could last for longer than the whole 30 minutes of the ride, that would have been ideal. However, in the end, part of you wished that said interview was probably on the other side of the globe instead of so close to your filming location. Because as you walked into the studio, try as you might, you couldn't hold back the lump in your throat as you saw the scene in front of you.

“Don't know what that is but it sounds good!” Chris said with a grin on his face, soon followed by easy laughter from both him and Ana.

Ana's hand was in that very second on his arm, giving a small squeeze as they kept laughing together, until it slowly but surely started sliding down until her hand was holding his. The interview kept going and they both had smiles on, an occasional laugh escaping here and there. Her hand remained with his long enough for you to notice how he thumb was rubbing soothing circles one moment and playing with his fingers the next in a slow and easy manner that you knew he loved, you knew relaxed him even in the most stressful situations – especially during interviews which you knew he always needed – and that you knew... was your thing. Or at least so you thought.

And apparently you had been mistaken for at least three years now. You had been mistaken to think those warm comforting touches were just for the two of you to share and say things without having to verbally phrase them. You had been mistaken to think that the smile you saw on his face as he looked at Ana was saved just for you. You had been mistaken to believe that the way his face softened and his eyes focused with an unmistakable spark of interest were reserved just for you when you spoke to him about things you loved and not also her as she answered a question that very moment. You had been mistaken to think that the way his shoulder fell in relaxation, in easiness and comfort, as if coming back home for a long day, was reserved just for you and was something that came naturally. As naturally as the feeling of love which he so openly showed both with his actions and words whenever he saw you... or at least used to.

Come to think of it, many of the things you had been considering as important, as unique, for the two of you, were probably nothing more than maybe you getting sentimental or worse too attached. And, for sure you now realized, not happening lately much if not at all. But maybe that was to be expected when you were hardly spending any time together whatsoever. Maybe even not as meaningful... not as true?

But if that love, if those looks and touches and words, were not true then what else about your relationship was in the first place? What was real? What was unique? If he could so easily relax around her, flirt with her and accept her flirting back so easily, so openly then-

You shook your head and tore your eyes from the scene before you, effectively silencing their laughter in your head, even though it already sounded very far off. The unpleasant feeling was back, squeezing your heart, tightening your stomach in knots and making your eyes burn. The bad taste in your mouth, as your throat closed, was there too and you decided to bite on the inside of your cheek to keep yourself from saying or doing anything you wouldn't like. Even the taste of blood was better, anything was better, really than the bitterness that came when you watched them interact like that.

You were above this, had always been especially with all the fans and female costars he had that got a bit more handsy and yes, you brushed most of it off. Most of it, when your blood wasn't boiling like it was right now because of how long this had gone on for.

Watching Chris making his way towards you, with his usually warm smile -even though you couldn't feel its sentiment at the moment -and a clear look of surprise on his face to see you there you felt that over the bitterness, you did feel mad. What you heard didn't help.

“Hey, Chris, don't forget about the meetup later yeah?” it was Ana and really you had nothing against her, not anymore, and not much more than your boyfriend.

Especially when he looked at her with a smile and nod “Sure thing I'll meet up with you there.”

“Honey, hey!” he breathed out and pecked your lips though you didn't even blink up at him, let alone smile “What a surprise, what are you doing here?”

“Surprise huh?” maybe you had originally planned it as that but now even the word made you huff angrily “Oh I'm not sure, maybe you would know better if you did check your phone once in a while. What the fuck is wrong with you, I called you so many times, Chris. Damn it I almost thought something happened. You always answer at least for a couple seconds, you always-” you stopped yourself immediately when you realized you were close to raising your voice and causing a scene which was the last thing you wanted.

Chris' eyes were somewhat wide and his smile had vanished. He considered your expression and stance for a few more seconds before he said in more serious voice “Maybe you'd like to talk in private then?”

Shaking your head, you huffed a humorless laugh but followed him as he took hold of your hand, linking your fingers and leading you away from the main set. No sooner were you alone than you pulled your hand from his grasp, not fact or angrily, only in a cold way without a single emotion on your face which you saw made his frown deepen.

“What's the matter baby?” he asked, voice low and somehow hoarse as he saw you wrap your arms around yourself and take a step back from him. A flush of hurt was visible in his eyes and you didn't like that it felt good to see it, but it was what it was.

“No first, let me ask you a question Chris.” you took a deep breath, trying to straighten your back “Do you know what day it is today?”

“Friday, why are you-”

“Oh so you do know, splendid! Then you haven't lost track of the date and you certainly haven't lost your phone or anything because you would have mentioned it when I brought it up. Which means you haven't been checking it or have checked, seen my calls, and didn't bother. Both of which, especially today, are equally bad. So, to sum it up-” you let out a shaky sigh “You don't give a damn about me anymore.”

“What?” he blinked in surprise “Where did that-”

“You know it's Friday and we always make plans for Friday night, always Chris. You make sure to text me about it first thing in the morning every single time. No matter where we are, even when we cannot be together, because we had promised. You had, Chris, because you knew. You knew how important it was to me to know even in the most simple way that my partner cares, you knew how much I needed that and I never asked for more never cared for more than just an hour out of your day, you knew better than anyone what I've gone through, and you promised Chris!” you pressed your fingers over your pursed lips when you realized you'd let yourself get carried away, raising your voice was not something you wanted. His eyes did widen this time and his eyebrows shot up.

You shook your head and made sure to wipe any sort of emotion from your face. Mostly caring to wipe out the proof of pain, that is, which you had been constantly feeling, because you were absolutely fine with him seeing the anger. If he managed to attribute it to your jealousy as well then you didn't care, you were beyond that now. If only it was as easy for the tears to be concealed.

You looked at him, and despite your red-rimmed eyes, your voice was low and cold “You always made sure to call. For the past three years. You never missed a single day. Until today. But of course-” you laughed bitterly, your words laced with venom as you nearly glared at him “You already made plans with somebody else, didn't you honey?”

“What- No, I-” he shook his head, eyebrows knitted together and baby blue eyes glistening with sadness and, dare you say, guilt “That's not what it looks like. Really, if this is about it then I promise I- (Y/n), of course you're welcome!”

“Welcome where? Cause I don't feel welcome anywhere in your life, Chris, let alone around her. And no it's clearly not just about this, but how would you even know how you've been making me feel all this time when you're hardly ever around, Chris?” you hissed before looking away from him.

“Hardly ever around?” you didn't know if your words hurt him as much as angered him, based on the way his eyes darkened with anger “Given that you do the same job, I didn't think you'd just show up like this only to pick a fight over something you know I have little control over. These days are harder on me and you know it, you can't really blame me for that! I was doing interviews all day and in between breaks I was so tired I forgot to check even my own phone, I didn't know that's a crime now.”

“So you do think that that's really what I'm trying to say here huh? Wow.” you blinked several times “You think you're the only one having a hard time, Chris? You have no idea about how hard of a time I am having then. No idea how emotionally exhaustion this new role is or how tired I am all the time. No idea how despite all that, I still can't go to sleep lately. And insomnia doesn't even begin to cover it, because of the doubts and constant thinking that I do and you're not there Chris, during any of it. You have no idea about any of it but I mean, how could you? We barely even talk anymore and no!” you raise your hands to stop him “It is not because of this job, it is because of her that all this is happening.”

“H-her?” he frowned in confusion before you saw the realization set down on him and a small sigh escape his lips “Ana? Really, this is all about that? (Y/n), you were always above this, you've never had a jealous fit. We both know I'm just spending some time with a friend, there is nothing more to that. There could never be, how could you ever believe otherwise?”

“How?” you couldn't stop a scoff “Really? You ask how? Oh my gosh, Chris, she is flirting with you nonstop! I have seen the looks and touches and everything, you can't be that oblivious. No I refuse to believe it. For the love of, that was the exact way I acted around you at first! It's crystal clear that she likes you and flirts with you and asks you out all the time and you- you're encouraging this! Chris, you spent twice the time with her than with me and I clearly don't mean work. You're constantly out with her, you do nothing to stop it and even when you're supposed to do something for the two of us you- you go and put her first. And only on second thought, as if to do me a favor, you think to invite me over because oh poor her she'll spend our night all alone. Honestly-” you laughed humorlessly “I wonder who's really your girlfriend after all. Or better yet-” you paused, hesitating for only half a second because maybe you were too hurt and the part of you that was angry was easily controlling your words but you didn't hold it back.

What is the point in being your girlfriend in the first place?

You heard him take a sharp breath in, his eyes and face all showing unbelievable guilt and pain at your words as if it was finally downing him the extent of his mistake. But you didn't let yourself feel sorry even for a second and if he really deserved a taste of his own medicine he was going to get it.

“I didn't know I- I made you feel this way.” his voice was shaky and you could see the beginning of tears make his eyes glisten. You were probably too cruel but so was reality and everything you had been experiencing so when he took a step forward you took one backwards as well. “Honey-” he made to touch you but you shifted away and he didn't insist, although his hands were shaking and his eyes were wide, he forced himself to stay calm you “You know that... I- I love you more than anything.”

“Do I?”seeing the way his lips fell apart but he shook his head and tried to get it together.

“(Y/n), hear me out please.” his hands were shaking and he let out a trembling breath as he ran his fingers through his hair.

He finally got the courage to back up “You know that I love, that will never- it can never change, no matter what. I would never do something like that to you, certainly not knowingly. I'm not that kind of man, I would never be and even more so not to you! You know how important you are to me, goodness, I love you with all my heart! I've loved you for years, nothing can take it away. It breaks me to think I made you feel like this, hell to even realize you're jealous--” he scoffed angrily but you could see it was directed at nobody else but himself as he ran a hand down his face “It's not anywhere near flattering or funny or cute when I see you like this. I shouldn't have let it get this far, it's my fault you feel like this, I know, but I promise-”

“Promise?” you breathed out, your voice barely above a whisper but somehow more effective than any screaming or jealousy fit you could throw as it made him stop on the instant, lips pressing shut “I think I've had enough of promises, Chris, don't you think?”

“Baby, I- I-” he frowned, not understanding how this had gotten so bad and maybe that was somehow comforting - certainly preferable to him encouraging her flirting knowingly or as a joke “I love you.”

“And I love you, but this-” you let out a shaky breath, shrugging numbly “It's not even jealousy, not anymore. Was it at first? Yes, yes it was. You're my boyfriend and you spent more time with her, out for drinks with Ana, out for a dinner with Ana and maybe some costar, interviews with Ana and talking in between breaks with Ana, letting Ana calm you down and comfort you when I-” you sighed “But as I said, not anymore. At this point... I don't have it in me to feel anything at all.”

“So-” you took hold of your things again “You can go ahead and have your fun and you don't have to feel sorry for me-” you hated how you sniffled but remained proud for how put together you still were “I hoped things were different but don't worry, I do know there is someone out there that at least wants my company, my presence in their life. I won't doubt that. I wished it was you but... what can you do?”

“Wh-what?” he breathed out shakily, his voice gruff as he slowly came to realize what you meant “What do you me-”

“Bye Chris, hope I'll see you... sometime within the next week, if you decide to show up at our place.” you gave him a tight-lipped smile before you rushed away.

He tried to reach out for you but you were faster, and him being still in shock and a mess of emotions, didn't have time to catch up with you. He stood in his place for a good few seconds, his heart hammering in his chest, eyes burning, lungs hurting and mind foggy. It didn't even register when he heard Ana speak to him, asking whether everything was alright, and him brushing her off with a small mumble before closing the door, maybe a bit too in her face but doesn't bring himself to care, and asking for some time alone. All the time he couldn't help but wonder how it all had gotten to this.

“Who...” he could only hear himself whisper with a deep frown, the thoughts running through his mind nowhere near pleasant as your words echoed again and again in his mind. He wanted to be even a bit angry, and maybe he was deep down underneath all this, but he couldn't fight the ache in his chest, the deep burn of jealousy which oh stung a lot, and ultimately the hurt than ran deep - even deeper when he realized that this was how he had made you feel - inevitably it brought a feeling of self-loathing as well.

But when he heard the small thud, of something falling, he realized it wasn't really a matter of who. He didn't even have the right to be angry at whoever was making you feel good, welcome and at ease; hell even if they made you feel wanted and desired, he had it coming and he even deserved it as much as he deserved the bitter taste in his mouth and jealousy in his heart. It was him who was at fault, him who had screwed up everything.

Looking down he saw the small object that had fallen from his pocket where he always kept it with him the past couple days, secured and safe away from eyes that could find it before it was the right time. He wanted to scoff bitterly at the thought, would he get the chance to find one after all?

“So much for a surprise huh?” he asks practically noone as he opens the box and takes the ring to toy with between his fingers.

[lalaangeldust]

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐚 𝐱 𝐠𝐧!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 [ 𝟑𝐤+ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 ]

[ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 ] : gross sticky icky fluff // friends to lovers troupe <3 // hanta is a huge dork, we all been knew this // hanta is also sickeningly sweet and affectionate // GOD, I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUCH

[ 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗶𝗽𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 ] : on a clear night, you go out to stargaze on the dorm roof; nothing out of the norm for you but in the middle of admiring the stars, sero comes out to join with something big he needs to get off his chest.

[ 𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐮𝐞 ] : you - blue // sero - orange

[ 𝗺𝘆𝗸𝗶𝗲'𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ] : i'm totally not projecting my fantasies onto sero and i'm totally not a sucker for friends to lovers fics :| /s

Sitting on the cool concrete of the dorm roof, the night illuminated by nothing but the streetlights below you and the stars above as you lay in silence with your legs propped against the roof's ledge. You've always thought the best part of UA was how it was out of the way so the stars are clearer than they were back in the city. Although graduation is soon and end of year exams are menacingly looming over you, you couldn't resist the urge to come out and soak up the full moon's gorgeous light. Nights like these, alone on a clear night, soft music playing through your headphones, scanning the vast sky, connecting the dots as your eyes wander to make constellations of your own are arguably one of your most favorite things in life.

The only thing that could possibly make this better is... him.

Eyes trailing to the brightest star you can find and admiring how it sticks out from everything else in your vision, your mind uncontrollably wanders to Sero. How that star kinda reminds you of him...

Ugh! what a ridiculous thing to think! Damn him for always finding a way to worm into your thoughts. Your hands fly to your forehead with a smack, outwardly groaning as you drag your fingers down your face in an attempt to shake off your thoughts. You've been friends with him for nearly three years! You would think you'd be over your petty crush on him by now. You two are practically siblings with how you two are almost always attached at the hip, always causing trouble together, always there when the other needed it, always making you feel safe... It would be weird to have feelings for him... right..?

But before you could rationalize your emotions any further, a hand reaches for your headphones, lifting one side off your ear as you hear a soft voice murmur behind you, “The moon’s beautiful tonight, isn't it?”

You practically jump out of your skin, immediately shooting up to take a defensive position. Although you can’t make out the silhouette you’re now facing, the all too familiar laughter that comes from them is more than enough to give away who this false intruder could be and you sigh in relief.

“Sero! You scared me half to death!!” you exclaim, relaxing your shoulders at seeing his familiar frame emerge through the dim light.

Tall and lean with a smile that could nearly rival the sun, the boy chuckles at you. His long pitch black hair he's been growing out for the past year cascading down the sides of his face, just barely brushing past his shoulders framing his face in a way that makes his dashing features stand out even more. Sero approaches you wearing a loose muscle tank top with his hands tucked in ill fitting sweats and a pair of black stud earrings he stole from you in his ears.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Sero chuckled, "I didn't mean to scare you so bad, doll". You send him a deep glare through the darkness and he throws his hands up out of his pockets to either side of his head in defense.

"...Maybe you shouldn't sit out here with music blasting in your ears,” Sero snarks back, “I could’ve been a villain,” he continues mockingly, “Not to mention that horrible stance you took. I don't think you’d fair very well against a villain while sitting down,” he teases with a wide grin smeared on his face. You scoff and roll your eyes in response.

“Are you only here to tell me how much of a hazard I am? Or do you want anything else, tape face?” you grumble.

“Oh, you wound me!” Sero exclaims dramatically, “I was simply wondering what my lil’ muffin was up to,” he muses, the dimples on his cheeks becoming visible as his grin only stretches wider as he speaks.

“Oh god, muffin!?!? ew!” you groan, “What the hell, I thought we agreed on no more stupid pet names,” you say with a giggle while scrunching up your nose.

“I didn't think it was stupid,” Sero huffs as he plops himself down next to you and wrinkles his nose back at you, “Muffin is a valid nickname. You just have no taste,” he concludes with a short nod, still smiling like an idiot.

You just roll your eyes and stick your tongue out at him before tilting your head up to go back to looking at the stars. Sero chuckles softly, staring at you for a moment while admiring you as you look at the sky with a softened smile on his face.

“Why you up so late?” he inquired.

“I could ask you the same thing, Sero,” you reply while throwing your head back down to look at him.

“Mmm, well, I was sleeping but… I suddenly woke up and couldn't go back to sleep,” he grunts as he adjusts himself into a more comfortable sitting position next to you.

You hum in acknowledgment before you look back up to the stars in the sky and Sero is left to admire you once again. How your eyes glimmer with the stars as the full moon softly illuminates your frame is a breathtaking view he would never tire of. The look on your face when you gaze at the sky, the look of pure adoration and awe is a look he hopes, prays, dreams you’ll give him one day.

“What’re you thinking, hun?” he softly asks, hoping you’d give him just the slightest glimpse of what goes on in your head. You pause for a moment, taking in his question and wondering how to answer it.

“Just thinking. Thinking thoughts. Nothing notable or important, I can assure you. Just enjoying the clear night,” you say, swerving his question to avoid the real answer. him.

“Ah, that was a rather vague answer,” he jests, mildly disappointed that you didn't let him in and you only hum in response.

“What about you?” you ask, “What made you wanna come up here?”

“Oh, well..” he begins but is held back by a lump that suddenly lodges in his throat, not really wanting to fully admit why he came up here with you.

In reality he hadn't slept at all. He’s embarrassed to admit it but he couldn't stop thinking of you all night, all day in fact. You just about consume his every thought and tonight, no matter what he did, he just couldn’t shake the thought of being with you.

After being so close with you for years now, people often assume the two of you are dating but the idea is almost always dismissed by a shy laugh and an averted gaze... Sero would be lying if he ever said he didn't relish the idea of being in a romantic relationship with you but... You never seemed all that interested in the idea and Sero was too scared to push the idea you may like him even half as much as he likes you. Never going farther than light hearted flirting and banter, some may call him a coward maybe but to him? Being your friend was enough. Well, that was until Mina and Kiri gave him a harsh wake up call earlier that morning.

They were scolding him on how painfully obvious it is how both you and Sero are nearly head over heels for one another, how they've spent the past year pining for one another, yet the both of you have stayed so blind to the fact you have feelings for each other. Absolutely dumbfounded by this, he asks what he should do about it, about you, to which they immediately and overwhelmingly demand him to confess his feelings for you. That is the real reason he came to find you.

“When I was trying to go back to sleep, I thought about something someone said… about taking chances,” he spoke in a soft and thoughtful tone, “Taking that blind leap of faith into the unknown things we’re afraid of because... what’s the worst that can happen…?” he pauses, rubbing the back of his neck, suddenly realizing how silly he probably sounds as he looks at you, “I dunno- sounds kinda dumb now that I say it out loud,” he says dismissively.

“No, no. I don't think it sounds dumb at all. I think it’s very insightful” you say, ushering him to continue by resting your head on your palm as you look at him intently to show your interest.

“Well, uh,” butterflies swarm to his chest as he tries to find the words to speak, finding it much harder to talk when he knows he has your full attention.

“Well, it led me to think about you 'cus I know that's something you talk about a lot as well… and I figured since it's a full moon tonight, you'd be up here,” he concludes. His gaze nervously shifting to his feet, averting his eyes from you to try and calm the fluttering nerves in his chest.

“I’m glad you did,” you hum, a low warmth growing in your chest from knowing he thought about you, “I enjoy your company,” you add thoughtfully. Though you probably just meant it in a friendly way, it didn’t change how much it meant to Sero to know you like having him around.

“I’m happy to hear that,” Sero chuckles nervously, a light blush dusting his cheeks as he slightly scooches closer to you. You take notice and you subtly tilt to the side, leaning in his direction not yet touching shoulders but leaving an opening to do so if he wanted.

“I uh- I also wanted to tell you something- In regards to what I was thinking about…” Sero mumbles nervously, hoping you didn’t catch what he said so he would have an excuse to not go through with his confession. Pretend like nothing happened and move on to just enjoy the simple friendship you two share.

“Oh?” You inquire, “What do you want to tell me? I’m all ears,” Sero fiddles with his thumbs, taking a moment to gather his thoughts before he speaks as you patiently wait for him.

"I- uh, I love you," he blurts, head swimming as he looks at you, eager and insatiably nervous to hear how you may respond, horrified you may not reciprocate his feelings and ultimately ruining what relationship you two did have.

"I love you too, Sero," you giggle.

Sero's heart drops, confidence dwindling as he assumes you thought he said "I love you" in the way you two always have. Just as friends. But he didn't. He meant it. He meant it in so many more ways he couldn't even begin to describe. He didn't expect you to reciprocate his feelings in the first place but that doesn't make him hurt any less.

"No, you don't understand," Sero sighs as he runs his hands through his long, thick hair, "I'm in love with you," You turn you head to him, Did he-? eyes widening at what Sero said, unsure if what you heard was a wishful hallucination or not. When you said "I love you" back, you genuinely meant it in the same way he does now. God, you've been in love with him for what seems like the first moment you two met but you would've never guessed Sero felt the same for you.

You sit in silence for a beat trying processes what Sero had just said to you. Your friend, your closest friend, is in love with you..? Something you've dreamt of becoming a reality. You start to get dizzy from the overwhelming euphoria and anxiety the realization simultaneously brings. You look at Sero, placing your hand on his to ground yourself as you look up at him, a warm smile spreading on your face.

"I love you too, Hanta," you say earnestly. Sero's heart leaps in his chest at your words. Not only did the person of his dreams reciprocate his feelings but they also addressed him by his first name?! He might as well be dreaming. Hearing his name fall off your lips like warm honey for the first time sends him flying through cloud nine.

"Y-you mean it??" Sero stutters, still unable to believe it. You give him a heartfelt smile as you squeeze his hand before standing up. You wordlessly walk around Sero and crouch behind him.

Utterly confused and growing increasingly flustered at your sudden close proximity, Sero opens his mouth to ask what you could possibly be doing but you shush him before he can say a word. Leaning against him, you ask permission to grab his hand and Hanta lets you guide his finger to the brightest star in the sky, hyperaware of every subtle shift, adjustment and breath you take behind him, clinging onto every passing moment.

"You see that star? The really really bright one right there and how it's brighter than the others?" you ask.

"Yeah... why.?" he questions, eager to hear what you have to say.

"Forgive me if this is too cheesy but it sorta reminds me of you," you say softly.

"Wh- I don't think a follow," Hanta replies and you give a short, breathy chuckle in response.

"Out of all the stars in the sky, you stick out to me to most. You're the brightest star," you murmur close to him, guiding his hand back down and you make your way to sit next to him. Hanta takes a moment to process what you said. Him? A star? He doesn't understand how you view him in such a way when there isn't much special about him in the first place... but he tries not to pay any mind to those thoughts as his eyes are glued to you sitting back down beside him.

"Pff, that was super cheesy," he snorts.

"Shut up, I'm trying my best," you grumble, "And... that's what I was really thinking about before you came," Hanta looks at you in awe, nothing but love and kindness filling his eyes as he gingerly grabs your hand, lifting it up level to his face.

"It's aright, doll, I was only teasing.. I think it's cute and~," he hums before placing a soft kiss on your knuckle, "I'm ok with cheesy," he concludes with a wink. Heat blooms on your cheeks at his action and you throw your head to the side, covering your mouth and cheek with your other hand in embarrassment. Hanta chuckles, just about ready to burst at how adorable you are and gets a sudden burst of confidence coursing through him from seeing your flustered form.

"Aw, don't get shy on me now, love," he coos, tugging your arm to usher you to look back at him. You look at him with a flustered scowl and Hanta isn't sure if you did it to intimidate him or what but all it did was make his heart scream for you more. His hand slides to your forearm and his other hand goes to grab your other arm, pulling it away from your face.

"Here, come here, baby," he murmurs, pulling your arms to guide you to his lap. You give little resistance as you follow Hanta's hands, shifting around to make yourself comfortable against him as you settle between his thighs. As soon as you got comfortable, Hanta's arms find their home around your waist, hugging you close and breathing you in. You sigh contently as your back rests against his strong chest, never feeling safer than you do right now in his arms.

"It's ok if I call you baby now, right..?" Hanta asks, not wanting to be too much at one time.

"Well, it would be if we were dating," you tease with a raised brow.

"Wha-?" Hanta looks at you confused for a moment before he realizes, "Oh! How could I forget," he chuckles softly, cupping your face in his large palm, guiding your face too look at him, his dark eyes practically engulfing you in his loving gaze.

"Would you care to be my partner..?" he purrs, voice dipping to a soft and low tone that sends goosebumps down your spine.

"W-well, when you put it like that how can I say no?" you mumble, not being able to help the heat rising up your neck, painting your cheeks pink once again from how small you feel under Hanta's enchanting gaze.

"So... is that a yes..?" Hanta inquires, hand still placed tenderly on our cheek. You nod your head against his palm, fingers caressing up and down his forearm as he holds you.

"Mhm, I would love nothing more," you reply in a soft and tender tone. Hanta melts at your words, feeling on top the world and like he can do anything. An uncontrollable smile erupts on his face, charming dimples ornamenting his cheeks as he hugs you tight to his body not wanting to ever let go.

You shuffle in his arms to turn yourself around in his lap. Now facing him, you tuck your face into the crook of Hanta's neck, wrapping your arms and legs snuggly around his torso. Hanta holds you equally as close, affectionately running his fingers up and down your back in complete bliss with you snuggling up to him.

"Can I kiss you..?" Hanta asks, voice just barely above a whisper. You lift your head up to look him in his deep eyes and you cup his face in your hand. Hanta leans into your touch, grabbing your hand on his face and guides it down just enough to plant a chaste kiss to the edge of your palm. You sigh and softly smile, nodding at the boy's question.

"Please kiss me," you murmur, leaning closer into his body. Hanta places his hand on the back of your neck, pulling you and a colliding your lips together. Though it was clumsy at first, you quickly adapt and your lips lock together like puzzle pieces. Tenderly, Hanta pulls away from you and rests his forehead against yours. The kiss you shared was short and sweet but still left the both of you breathless and yearning for more.

"May I kiss you again?" Hanta questions playfully and you giggle in response while nodding your head against him. He leans in, smiling against you as you mash lips with together, the both of you sighing into the other's mouth. This kiss a lot more confident than the last as Hanta takes the lead to explore every bit of you he can, taking note of every noise, movement and reaction you give. This time you pull away, surfacing for air from Hanta's intense hold on you.

"I can kiss you again, right?" Hanta asks again.

"How many more kisses do you want??" you giggle.

"That is a dangerous question to ask, my love," Hanta purrs into you, his breath ghosting your neck as he nuzzles his face underneath your jaw and lays a soft peck where his face lies, "I'd take all of them," he says, scanning your face for any discomfort but once he sees you're ok with him continuing, he lays another peck on your neck.

You laugh at the ticklish feeling, lacing your fingers through his dark hair as he continues showering you with short kisses.

"Let me know if I'm being too much, yeah?" kiss on your neck, "I don't wanna be too much," another kiss on the neck, "or overwhelm you," kiss on your jaw, "'cus that would be sad," kiss on the corner of your mouth.

"Hanta!" you squeal through giggles.

"I'm sorry, hun" kiss on your cheekbone, "I just can't resist," kiss on your cheek, "you have no idea," kiss on the chin, "just how long," kiss on the nose, "I've wanted," kiss on the eyelid "to do this," kiss on the brow, "And now," kiss on the temple, "I can't," kiss on the forehead, "Stop,"

Erupting with giggles, you desperately try to squirm away as Hanta continues to relentlessly shower you with kisses.

"No, no, no! Hanta!" you cry through your laughter, "No more!"

Giving you one last peck on the lips before pulling away, Hanta finally gives into your pleas and stops his assault of kisses. He presses his forehead against yours as you calm down from your laughing fit, pulling some giggles from Hanta as well because of your contagious laugh.

"I love you," you sigh once you've finally calmed down. Hanta hums in response, placing his hand on the back of your head, letting his fingers lace through your hair.

"I love you too," he says, heart feeling full and beaming with joy.

Forever and always~

𝒇𝒊𝒏 . ✩

[ lil easter egg of sorts for those of you who don't know~ in Japanese when you ask someone "The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" or

『月が綺麗ですね』 // "tsuki ga kirei desu, ne?"

it's actually a very poetic way to confess your love to the person you're asking ]

[ I think it's literally so fucking cute 'cus i myself am deeply in love w/ the moon :) ]

[ if this were a thing in English and someone confessed to me this way, i would immediately demand for their hand in marriage >:| ]

[ god, japanese culture is so cool, i love it sm ]

ALSO- CAN WE NORMALISE ASKING SOMEONE OUT BY ASKING THEM TO BE YOUR PARTNER INSTEAD OF BF / GF????

"would you care to be my partner?" UHBIJNIJAHHHH LITERALLY SO ROMANTIC AND GENUINE HOLY SHIT- i'm making myself simp

RAAAHHHHHHH

[persephoneyss]

Bad Movie.

Pairing: Jung Hoseok x f! Reader. Ft. Jungkook.

Genre: Yandere, dark themes, angst, gore a little.

Summary: ❝Looking for the person you love, beautiful woman.❞

Warnings: Yandere behavior, obsession, harassment / stalking, humiliation, forced marriage, non-sexual intercourse, abuse of power, implicit murder, drug use naming, minor past master / pet relationships, secondary character abduction, ugly hallucinating hoseok , beatings, blood, photos depicting abuse, mistreatment and death, bribery, sexism and humiliation (directly aimed at female prostitutes), hoseok mistreats and humiliates jk, awkward marriage proposals, use namjoon as a secondary character because it hurts more:(, etc.

Number of words: 6000+

︙Author's Note: This is my longest fic so far, I think. It took a lot for me to do it, especially since I didn't have a clear idea about the whole plot that would take and the role that each character would develop. So if you see Jungkook in a kind of strange character, blame my mind for including him almost last. Also, I hate Hoseok in this fic. Namjoon angel and fallen soldier, by the way let me know if they cried with his death, it hurt me to write it. Thank you very much for the 200 notes in my previous fic, I'm crying.

Read the Warnings well and enjoy!

(Sorry for any mistakes, my first language is not English and I am not fluent either.)

Puedes leer este fic y más aquí en español.

Confidence, a beautiful and treacherous feeling at times.

Feeling superior is a constant whisper of the ego within you, calling to be released and make others feel as what they really are, despicable and useless trash. It was fun laughing at losers when you haven't had that sense of defeat yet.

Hoseok fervently watched his rivals fall at his feet, laughing at his incompetence and stomping even more pathetic defeated form even though they were already dead in tears of pain. He smiled, he always did when he felt invincible and He bit his lip gently to hold back an excited laugh.

No one could be compared to him, and in his high sense of power he could never be alert when he struck him with a blast of vengeance.

It was you.

His eyes stared at you in horror and anger, his ego inside him hated you from the first moment. Because while despicable, he loved you for much more than his pride and winning sense.

He fell at your feet but he never made you notice it, behaving as he normally would around you even though he was always behind you.

Luck was her greatest ally, he always smiled at her and she helped him. It was fun to play with your opponents pretending to be the victim, the cornered mouse and then smash everyone with a snap of your fingers.

His mother looked at him with love and his father with pride, he was the only and favorite son of the Jung family. His success was never derived from love, much less, it was blasphemy in his family to say something so false and impossible.

Hoseok admired his family when they met in the great message of his parents' house, his grandparents smiled and his relatives brought out their most exquisite stories to entertain. They were all crows pretending to show interest in a prestigious place in the will of the family's monarch, his grandfather.

It was at one of those dinners that he got to meet you, he used to get bored of hearing his cousins ​​tell their anecdotes with prostitute women who mostly called, whores of a night. Mocking their shocked faces when they refused to pay them and threw them out of their big luxurious houses.

He rolled his eyes when a family friend, little Jungkook who was known to his father because of his prestige in his last name, chimed in trying to get into the conversation with a shy smile.

Lucky bastard, he thought bitterly. He didn't like the little idiot sticking his hands in boiling water, he wasn't even supposed to be there.

He hummed a goodbye as he walked out the front doors, walking aimlessly to his bored eyes. His feet stopped abruptly with a strangled sigh when he first saw you, you looked tired as you apparently searched for a key inside your bag. Could visualize the logo on your shirt from the grocery store where he assumed you were employed, He stood looking for what seemed like an eternity at you before you find the keys and rush through the back door. He snorted before lazily continuing on his way, however the next day he ended up following in your footsteps again and with even more confidence.

It took a few weeks for him to be able to enter the small commerce store and be able to look you face to face for the first time, it was expected that you would serve him with a smile asking if he was offered something. But he did not see you anywhere, he looked for you before another equally young woman approached him kindly, he sighed making a face of disgust surprising the she worker, his expensive shoes got dirty on the floors of the humble place with shame. His little investigation and search took him through many corridors of the establishment, he observed the shelves and each person who seemed to be wearing the uniform of the store thinking of finding you distracted with your work, maybe he thought of approaching you and asking for directions which he clearly didn't need. Knowing that  she you couldn't refuse because that was your job. In a way, you were there to serve him.

He let out a bored sigh, tired of playing hide and seek, he turned around ready to leave that place that disgusted him so much in a certain way, but once again he stopped in an instant. It was a moan. He clenched his fists, walking hurriedly to the place where the noise came from, he was sure it was your voice and that made him even more angry thinking that he would find you in a compromising position with someone.

He did not think that his lover would be such a stupid and dirty person.

You were crouched on the floor, grimacing with pain and exhaustion. You seemed very annoyed trying to lift a box with your arms, the scene was tender and certainly pathetic, she smiled noticing that you were so distracted that you were never aware of how I was watching you with carnal desire and painfully bad adoration.

"I-can I help you." He was surprised at his little babble, justifying himself later. Nobody ever managed to make him nervous, his father used to despise weak people and certainly he always sought his approval by doing things that were not correct. "They seem heavy."

Your face pale before the scare, turning into a face of shame quickly, you shook your head with a gentle movement, smiling still pained. "I'm fine sir. Can I help you? Maybe he got lost, let me guide-..."

"Actually, I do need help but not with your services." I speak in disagreement, you seemed confused but she nodded at his request. The customer is always right, right? How convenient. "I need you to allow me to help you with that heavy box, not to be rude or calling you weak miss, but you can't seem to handle it."

Lie, under his politically correct excuse was a dialogue about how insufficient you are even with things as easy and common as carrying a box, obviously you needed his help and Hoseok could give you that and more, much more. You just had to say it, it was so simple and fun.

"I -... I can do it, but i will accept your help sir ..." He smiled making an emphasis for he to give him his name, he let out a small laugh finishing his sentence.

“Hoseok, you can call me Hoseok, darling..." He mock imitating his position, your name left your lips like a melody and he immediately felt the sweet taste of it slide down his tongue. Beautifully perfect, indeed. "Now that we can finish the introductions please allow me."

Her expensive outfit crumpled as she bent down to lift the box with ease, you were once again oblivious to her incoherent and certainly crazy fantasies, it was like a romance comedy movie in her eyes. The charming fellow always stays with the girl. And likewise, no one could go against the fictional plot.

He was immersed in the beautiful narrative that you would be hers at the end of the credits.

It was not the last time she saw you, she returned to her same routine of continuing to stalk you with obvious impudence. The only thing that really changed was her new setting and her character, he was hiding between the shelves waiting for the right moment to appear in front of you with a charming smile. Over and over, he was locked in an infinite loop.

He was starting to get tired of just having you in his arms and sheets just in his heavy and lustful dreams.

"A date? How funny Hoseok."

His face twisted in annoyance, but he put on a fake smile again when you looked at him again. "Hobi." He corrected in a high-pitched voice, insisting that you call him that. "And she spoke very seriously my dear, everything is ready."

"Eh ... I -..." A simple wave of her hands was enough to shut you up, you frown in confusion and secretly disgusted.

"On Saturday, I'll send you the address of the restaurant. Goodbye, dear!"

You watch it for a few seconds but he's already gone, you resign yourself to continuing with your work of ordering the products on the shelves. Thinking and trying to remember when you gave him your number. A very characteristic noise distracts you, a call makes you smile with love and adoration.

The plot is taking an interesting turn.

Hoseok was charming by nature, his economic position made him even more desirable to the opposite gender and even his own. It was not strange to see people flirting with him or being suggestive with his proposals, he was on a pedestal and he enjoyed it. His subconscious whispered a little bored. I couldn't deny that he became boring in a way, but you appeared in the story as an extra who soon became a main character. You changed the script of his life already established and narrated.

You were so funny.

He smiled in front of the mirror when he thought of you, since he met you that day he started chatting with you secretly from your supervisor. You had told him several anecdotes to make him laugh, you were also naturally charming pulling out various expressions of adoration that you did not even notice. Oblivious to that, you'd better get ready for the climax of the movie.

The wind was strong in the streets of Seoul, your hair was noticeably messy causing you to let out a tired sigh. You should be planning your wedding banquet right now, but you honestly didn't want to leave Hoseok alone at the dinner he had organized. You put the invitation in your bag, thinking of giving it to her when the time was right with a smile. He seemed like a good person and undoubtedly a good friend in the future.

"You're on time, I was just about to order our food. Honey." The last word slid down his tongue with malice and arrogance, Hoseok inwardly chuckling at your disengaged expression.

"Thanks, but don't stop you can order for both." You say arranging your chair correctly.

The restaurant looked relatively empty, there were only three other people including a couple who ate dinner while chatting enthusiastically.

You smile unconsciously, thinking about what would also make you feel the same way.

"I was looking forward to this dinner, my dear. I also hoped I could tell you how much you have captivated me for a long time, specifically since the first day I saw you." And the others too, he thought shifting your posture.

"Thank you, I'm very flattered to cause that feeling ... in, good in you." You whisper clearly uncomfortable forcing yourself to stay calm. You were sure that you had never given a hint or anything else in Hoseok to establish romantic feelings. "But I-... "

"I know, darling. That is why I have to offer you the opportunity to be my girlfriend and my future wife."

Wife?

For a moment, you feel a rush through your body. You refuse to make a scene in front of all the few people present out of respect, you calm down by counting to ten slowly in your head, but it becomes very difficult for you as you continue to observe his comfortable smile and how he behaves. He seemed very sure of the affirmative respect you would give him, you snort angrily at the thought.

"I am sorry to have been misunderstood Mr. Hoseok, but I am not seeking a relationship with you and very sorry I reject any relationship beyond friendship." Your body lifts up, making Hoseok laugh well in advance of your final sentences. "I am engaged and my future husband is waiting for me, good afternoon."

Trembling, you leave the invitation in silence, leaving the luxurious premises in the same way. The waiters watching you with surprise, being an audience of rejection and humiliation on your part. Hoseok sighs, sipping his wine glass patiently pretending not to hear what the couple behind him are saying.

What a bad luck.

Life wanted to want to return all his damn vanity to him, making fun of him with your almost imminent rejection, obviously he knew that you were engaged and that you loved the poor man who had the bad luck to be his competition, but love is not always the important thing in a relationship or at least not of both parties. The voices of the waiters and the couple distract him from his plans for his next step, he clenches his fists angrily dropping the silverware on the plate calling the attention of everyone in the place.

"Filthy vulgar and talkative people, she will be my wife even if her words have been heard by her prying ears." He raised his voice, causing everyone to shut up. "It's just part of the script."

Maybe if the character who wanted to be the main loses the role of him, he should be the villain. The bad guy in the movie.

He read the invitation with meticulous delicacy, laughing at the little message you put aside. He thought about attending for a second, wondering if it would be nice to walk in to go straight to the altar and shoot your husband willing to take his place by your side. But that would be risky.

"Where are we going, sir?" He asked his driver with a smile.

"Take me to the best brothel in Seoul." He whispered delicately, smiling just as happily as before your rejection. I'd make you pay double the bill for your indulgence.

And likewise, the world is a truly small place. Jungkook nodded clearly uncomfortable obeying someone other than Mr. Jung. Hoseok cornered him like a helpless rabbit in the claws of a cunning fox, flashing his jaw in warning. He felt confused about his little assigned task, watching the direction pointing the right way to his chauffeur who only followed orders.

A small feeling of remorse ran through him, making him want to vomit when he remembered how Hoseok's face was so close to his with arrogance, as his hands roamed his arms gently. He was disgusting how he used his power to such a useless and demanding gain, sometimes without any realism.

"Little Jungkook, you have a very lovely name. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, you were so insignificant that you seemed pathetic to me." He whispered making her wince. "My father told me that you are good at obeying, I would like to test his theory." His cold hands were constantly running down his arms, making a shiver run through his body. "Still remembering well, I already did it before."

Jungkook was weak under his cloak of power, where he could so easily hide it. Lose it. "Yes, h-hyung." An inappropriate moan came from his lips causing him to cover her mouth in shame, a little touch near his crotch was enough to tempt him. Hoseok smirked, narrowing his eyes before walking away slowly wiping his fingers on his expensive clothes in disgust.

"I want you to befriend someone, don't ask, just do it. I'll tell you your next step when you're done." He ordered bored.

"We are here, young Jeon." Notice Jimin with a smile, Jungkook sighed wearily thanking him before getting out of the car ready to fulfill his mission.

I observe him for a few seconds standing in the entrance without doing anything, he was cleaning the windows of the building with force. He seemed like a nice person, certainly a bit humble. He approached making the man bow respectfully, even though he was older. Money can buy everything, they say.

"I am young Jeon, a new investor. May I have a chat with you?"

The man was surprised, no one who was someone by name and a few numbers along with several zeros would be able to notice his presence and at least greet him. A coffee sounded more intimate and undoubtedly inconvenient for him, but again out of respect he accepted the offer with a smile adorning his features.

"My name is Jungkook informally, but I like you and you can call me that." He spoke kindly.

"Namjoon, Mr. Je -... I'm sorry, Jungkook." He corrected sheepishly, making her smile.

He still didn't understand that he planned to do Hoseok with a building cleaner, but he didn't feel in a position worth asking. Furthermore, he would still not receive an honest answer.

He passed by the same place every day, pretending to enter the building only so he could meet Mr. Kim and talk about unimportant subjects. He gained his trust almost immediately, promising that he would give her a better job soon at his own company. He felt like an idiot taking advantage of the man in front of him in such a way for a simple whim from Hoseok.

He was an idiot, but he didn't want to go back to what he was before. A pet.

"I'm very happy, I think she will make a good wife." He responded with encouragement, seeing how Namjoon nodded looking for a picture of his fiancée to show him. He seemed excited, Jungkook understood his happiness after he explained that he saved for a long time to achieve his dream of getting married in a church. They were both in it together, in looking for a future.

He got lost in his thoughts, maybe if he lied to Hoseok about gaining trust from him, saying that Namjoon was a very cold and quiet man, he could make him forget about it. He sighed squeezing the coffee cup in his hands, Namjoon caught his attention by showing a photo of you smiling at the camera with a background of the bridge and the sun behind making a beautiful background.

Jungkook became alert, having seen that face before.

Hoseok had you as the wallpaper on his phone, he knew it was you because of your characteristic features and the scarf you wore in both photos. You were the new fad of a rich fool.

"T-is ... She's so cute, you're very lucky."

Namjoon nodded with a smile, apologizing before returning to his work upon being called by his supervisor. Jungkook put aside his cup feeling the bitter taste of his thoughts, Hoseok was planning something, he knew he was a son of a bitch who liked to keep his plans under lock and key and in a deep grave. He walked away calling for Jimin quickly, before being accosted by Namjoon who came running over, seemingly forgetting something of the utmost importance.

"I apologized Mr. Jeon, but I wanted to give you this personally. It is an invitation, in addition to the proposal to be the best man at our wedding. My fiancee said that it would be appropriate for me to choose someone and I decided that you were perfect, you can decline if you prefer. . " He spoke kindly, as always. Namjoon seemed to have no hatred in his heart, making his own feel heavy on his chest.

Could he bear the blame?

"It's my pleasure to accept her proposal, thank you for considering me. Good afternoon, namjoon-hyung."

He said goodbye by getting into the car as fast as he could, making Jimin look at him with derision. Obviously noticing his nervousness, Jungkook sighed hiding the invitation as much as he could before reading Hoseok's message ordering him to go to his house to sort out his affairs.

It seemed like a joke as he always looked so flawless, ready to humiliate him again.

"Jungkookie, I'm glad to see you again. Now, we'd better come in for our talk." He smiled making anger grow inside him, Hoseok sat on one of his expensive furniture before pouring himself a glass of wine. "Well, I heard from a little bird that you accomplished your task. Good pet."

"Don't call me that, hyung." He grunted in annoyance, making him laugh. "I can't go through with this, I did what you wanted. Leave Namjoon-hyung alone."

"Oh, they're close now really cute. But you forget that I can't fulfill your wish, because "Namjoon-hyung " is an essential piece in my little game." I speak mocking him as always. "Then we will move on to the next step ..." He thinking for a moment, before snapping his fingers. "Invite him to a bachelor party night at the brothel in the center, I already made the reservation. When they are there, leave him alone. A whore will take care of him properly, and maybe you can go make him a oral another yourself." He sneered evilly, reminding her of his past, Jungkook bit his tongue resisting the urge to respond properly. "Since you're clearly good at it, little pet."

"Yes, hyung."

Hoseok nodded saying for him to leave asap, tired of seeing his stupid face. He got up ready to do so, but his arm was taken tightly before bringing his face closer to hers, Hoseok let out a sigh, doing he could smell his breath of mint and wine combined. His hand lowered him into his pockets dangerously close to his crotch, he bit his lower lip to resist a moan escaping him, this had happened before and he begged it to stop forever. From his pocket, she pulled the invitation out, making her gasp in horror.

"Godfather of wedding, new facet of you... kookie." Rolling he eyes pushing him away from him, he fell to the ground before being met by a blow to his cheek. "What a shitty pet, you idiot."

Two days was enough for you to tremble at the thought. Your dress was proud to be seen, it was the most comfortable dress you could find at a fair price. Namjoon tried to enter but he was stopped by your friend who said that he will wait until you keep the dress out of his sight avoiding bad luck. A smile wavered on your face, everything was perfect up to a point.

Namjoon looked at you, a blush covering his cheeks before asking his obvious question. You didn't expect him to want a bachelor party, but you couldn't refuse because you simply trusted him.

Maybe it was your mistake.

You wished him luck, feeling an inexplicable emptiness. Your friends didn't offer to make one for you, they just sat on the couch in their living room talking about movies and arguing about what color the cake would be. It was the calm before the storm.

Jungkook felt a giant headache, the lights of the place were making him dizzy. Jimin had insisted on going with him to such an 'unusual' place to keep him safe. Namjoon had brought a couple of friends who seemed to be always close to him preventing the woman who did the job Hoseok had him do from becoming difficult.

He smiled, thinking that he would have no choice but to let it go. But Hoseok was not a good loser, and neither was he a good winner.

Hoseok:

He distracts his friends, and be careful what you say, kookie.

Received at 11:30 p.m.

He bit his lip, glancing around the bar, thinking he'd find him sitting somewhere spying on everything but nothing looked suspicious. He sighed, sending Jimin out for drinks with one of Namjoon's friends who he gladly accepted. He got up having pushed one away, the other who introduced himself as Jackson seemed more reluctant to leave his friend alone but with a few excuses about feeling bad managed to get him out of sight.

Believed that he would find Namjoon sitting right where he was before but no, he was gone. He felt a burning feeling of guilt, maybe if you didn't find out, nothing would happen.

"You're still the same as before, boss." Jimin sat down next to him, making him uncomfortable.

"Same as before? I am no longer a child."

"But you continue to obey as one. The manipulation they use on you is your greatest weakness, you are afraid, you obey without hesitation thinking about how this will indirectly affect you. But you never do anything to avoid it, you feel bad about this but you still sit here without doing nothing."

"What can I do, Jimin? I don't know if he really left by his will, or if they forced him. I don't want to enter a room in this dirty place and see him sleeping with another woman, because he wanted to and is a fucking infidel . "

Jimin ignored his words, falling silent after several seconds.

Feeling unhappy is a horrible feeling without a doubt. The curious eyes looked at you as if they themselves could judge your story.

Namjoon disappeared as quickly as the wind, many sharp tongues said that he eloped with a lover so as not to marry you. Others believed it was a kidnapping, maybe a robbery gone wrong and he was taken away or he was killed somewhere far away. A sob escaped you just thinking about it, the detective in front of you watched you cautiously.

"We don't know anything about him yet, but we will continue with the investigations."

You nod, without saying a word. Jungkook came in minutes later with a handkerchief in hand, he observed you before gently hugging you. You had the pleasure of meeting him after Namjoon disappeared that night, he introduced himself as a close friend from work and quickly offered to help you with the search.

Maybe he felt guilt.

"Thanks, Jungkook." You smile wiping the tears that escape from your eyes.

"They are looking for the best they can, they even alerted the Japanese embassies in case they might take him there."

"Japan?" Puzzled questions. "Why would someone take him so far? He's just a man with little money, that's ridiculous."

"We don't know, but I promise I won't rest until I find it."

Hoseok sighs bored, witnessing the moment. He had been bribing the bloody police force to hide the information from you about the discovery of your fiancé's corpse floating in the middle of the waters of the river where they used to go together. The only thing that was removed intact from his clothes was a small photo of you smiling, sitting on the banks of the same river.

The police mourned the death, but his faces left grief when they saw the money in his hands. He made fun of Jungkook as usual, who passed by him ignoring him when he went to his house to talk to his father, he knew that the useless little one was very meddlesome in the search for your future husband and ex-fiance. He rolled her eyes remembering how she used to look at him with discontent in meetings, suspicious of him.

He was a good detective, he couldn't deny the obvious.

"You didn't have to do this, a I'm sorry was enough." You say admiring all the bouquets of flowers that came to your house from him. "And I'm sorry for your loss."

He wasn't sorry.

"My dear, losing a loved one is something without a name. I can give you more than this if you promise to smile again, I love your smiles."

Jungkook snorts approaching you from behind, Hoseok to growl at noticing him so close and see how he puts his hand on your shoulder, apparently like support.

"Hyung, he didn't think it's a good time for ... That."

"But little kook, when is not a good time to express how you feel about your loved one?"

"When that person you say you love is crying over the loss of someone special because of evil people who don't know what remorse is. Do you understand that, hyung?"

"No, not really." He laughs cynically making you lose your patience, your little body comes between the two men, with one already furious and the other inadvertently giving up, you make a face of annoyance before speaking.

"Sirs!" You yell at him immediately, Jungkook steps back adjusting his tie. A mania that he had and that you noticed when he presented himself in front of you with regret, he did it when he was uncomfortable or nervous. "This is not the time to argue, I think you'd better leave my house if you're just wasting your time. Thanks for the flowers Hoseok, and Jungkook ... I, I want to continue the investigation on my own."

"That?!"

"What you heard, don't feel responsible for Namj's disappearance -..." You tremble correcting your words, making Hoseok scoff. "My husband, he was just at the wrong time in the wrong place. Thanks for your help, I'll see how to pay you very soon." Jungkook denies trying to insist but fails when you are already closing the door and giving him an apologetic smile.

Your breath feels heavy, you sigh falling to the ground sobbing again. You wanted to find Namjoon, but a large part of you was afraid of how. Dead, with another woman, with serious injuries or simply ... Alive but with trauma for life. You did not want to see him suffer, it was your judgment in life to see the person you love cry in his pain.

You observe yourself, telling yourself that you would be fine when you find it.

Your email seems to explode with thousands of messages received from people claiming to have seen a man like Namjoon near their homes. You ignore them knowing that most of them were false, the first few days you read all of them giving the police false clues that they quickly denied and dismissed.

You dry your tears, closing all the windows and cooking a simple instant soup, eating in absolute silence. It was overwhelming feeling alone at home, where you were supposed to feel safe indoors.

The rain, thunder, and evil outside seemed to be invisible within that place.

A chill runs through you, the control of the television seemed tempting to calm that neat silence and avoid your boredom. You give up turning on the TV, you see the first channel, you keep changing looking for the unknown, you didn't know what you wanted to see. Maybe a newscast saying they found a tall man with dark brown hair and charming eyes unconscious, with a couple of blows to the face and a few scratches but okay, safe, alive and waiting to see your face waiting for him with a warm smile.

Swearing never ever to let go.

A couple of tears slide down your cheek, ruining your fast food. A few knocks on the door manage to scare you, causing you to bite your lip in anger.

"Who is?!" Questions in a shout.

Nothing.

"It better be good ..." You say in muttered, you open the door expecting to see a child running to his house laughing at his childish joke.

But no, there is no one at the door. Just a small envelope that easily slipped underneath, you take it hoping it's a letter from the police announcing good news. Maybe a simple identification of suspicious faces, or footprints at the club.

"I hate being the bad guy, it makes me feel good.

He's dead, I did it for you. For me. For us. I want to make you happy but it's so difficult when I don't know what you want, tell me what you want.

Love you. Love you. Love you.

My heart is so weak in your cold eyes, I feel that you look at me with ignorance of my feelings. Do you want to find it? Do you want to do it?! Okay. Good luck with it. "

It was everything, plus a picture of a golden ring with a large diamond shining brightly. You wrinkle the letter in anger, tossing it into the first bin you found nearby. It seems that in the end, someone did want to joke with you.

Your days remained the same, you went out to work and in the afternoons you called each of the investigators to ask for new news, it was almost always a solid wall, there was nothing really important to report and little by little, they gave up.

Jungkook knocked on the door, he heard some footsteps approaching making him have a little hope. But when the door opened he saw you with a worried face, he felt his heart squeeze in his chest when he tried to get closer but you avoid him by leaving in a hurry. You were dressed in a long black skirt and a white blouse, you were elegantly ready for something.

"Where are you going?" He ask stopping your hurried pace, taking your arm tightly.

"Yo, listen... He... Or her, I don't know who it is but ... You know, he or her know where, he's alive I know. I just don't have time, please."

Your mouth moves wiht fear, you were hiding something but not from him. You were willing to tell him but not now. Not at that time.

"Let me accompany you, I can take you and I will feel better if you are safe."

You nod, letting go of his grip and running down the stairs, outside there is a very elegant car, apparently waiting. The driver smiles at you as if he had known you before, you make an uncomfortable face trying to continue on your way but Jungkook introduces him saying that he works for him.

"Jimin, he's Jimin. He's a good person and a great friend, I've told him about you before."

"I see, sorry." You speak with a bow before climbing to the back, Jimin just smiles kindly, as always.

"Where are we going today?" He asks animatedly, Jungkook takes your hand for support making Jimin remove the smile from him. Your nervous state and your afflicted face are enough for him to understand the situation.

You give him an address, Jimin searches the map being unknown to the place. Your eyes sparkle when the lights of Seoul are reflected in them, Jungkook holds your hand tightly in fear of letting you go again. He felt sick when you stopped calling him, cutting connections with him totally to this day. He spend sleepless nights looking for more clues, the only thing I had until that moment was the identity of the woman, she was a prostitute without anything special, when he spoke with her he seemed indifferent saying that he did not know Namjoon and that the last time he saw him It was when he drugged him and left him in a room as ordered.

The whore made fun of him saying that he would give him this information if he did not tell the police anything, he obviously accepted. Now he repented, the woman disappeared after that and days later she was found in a garbage container. It seemed to be a suicide, the container was from her building, the window of her old apartment faced just where she was supposed to fall if she threw herself without thinking twice.

Right in the garbage.

The wheels of the car made a thud when it stopped, it was a cabin, the only one nearby. You came down quickly thanking Jimin who just made a flirty face. Your hands trembled with the cold, you look at the letter that tells you where and when you should be standing at the door.

"Wait for me here, if we don't go out or you hear noises, you know who to call."

"Yes sir!" Jimin obeys with a laugh at the boss's serious tone of him.

"Y-you should go, I can do this alone." Your voice rises in the echo of the silent place, Jungkook rolls his eyes before offering his arm to you, making his decision clear.

You laugh calming your nerves, the door opens just as you both step close to it. A man stops them, saying that only you can enter the next room. You stop Jungkook who was to protest, you calm him down by leaving your ring in his hands with a smile.

Your body disappears when another man closes the door silently, Jungkook sighs looking annoyed at the guards who ignore him.

A message coming to his phone distracts him for a few seconds.

Jimin:

Should I call the police, Mr. Jung, or the hospital?

Received at 9:35 p.m.

Smile ready to answer before hearing the door open again, he approaching you to ask everything and at the same time nothing. Your pale face is enough to make want to hit the person who was inside with you. Questions remain in the air, your arms surround him while you sob for forgiveness.

From the shadows Hoseok smiles, admiring the document in his hand, your signature shiny as gold is glued to it. He thought it would be more difficult to convince you to accept his marriage proposal, but the precious and expensive ring fit you perfectly. He raised his hand proudly admiring his own, the wedding would be planned as soon as possible making him jump like a happy child.

You had accepted, with the promise that he would bring you back to Namjoon.

But it was never specified in the contract that he would be alive.

The wedding was in a meadow, outdoors with distinguished guests and a few friends and family of yours. Hoseok greeted everyone, by taking your hand tightly introducing you as his wife immediately. It's as if he wants to show everyone that you now belong to him, as if you were a prize.

And maybe if you gave him the key to her success.

"You better smile my dear, nobody wants to know what will happen if you don't." Her lips brushed your hand before placing a chaste kiss on it. "I love you, my beautiful protagonist."

You sob, tears falling from your face as you melt into his disgusting caresses. The man in front of you, your un-predestined husband. The one who stole the position of your true love, he was kissing you delicately.

"Don't cry, decorate the room just the way you wanted. The photos were a special touch ..." His teeth bit into the sensitive skin of your neck, an involuntary groan of pain escaping. "Love you."

Your eyes move desperately to find a photo where the beaten, abused or dead body of Namjoon cannot be seen. You scream when you find one where you see blood everywhere, you are resigned to look down at the ground where Hoseok was crouching kissing the inside of your thighs.

Your mind tried to process the idea that Namjoon had been killed, mutilated and thrown into a river that washed away his body along with happy memories. Farewell to him was prolonged as your body faded in pain.

Hoseok enjoyed the sight of your eyes tightly closed, his cock throbbing inside you as she fucked you like his wife.

The head of the bed moved crashing into the wall, and unconsciously your walls tightened around it causing it to release a curse aloft to the sky.

We got to the end of the movie, smiled as he dazzled the credits by seeing Jungkook's lost name. His little bitch who was his toy for many years, laughed remembering how she did wonders with her mouth.

He pretended not to know him when her father introduced him, taunting her hurt face.

He held you in his arms tightly, you had been struggling to free yourself from his grip as he continued to abuse you over-stimulating your pussy. Your eyes closed falling asleep from crying so much.

He caressed your face, kissing your dry, chapped lips.

The end.

[innocent-chris-evans-slut]

Your first time, with Tom

he would just be so sweet and caring, setting up the right mood for the two of you

maybe it would happen on St. Valentin’s Day, or just on your anniversary

it would happen at his house in London, Tom had come back to his hometown only for you two to spend the day together

he would take you out at lunch, in the restaurant in the suburb you like the most

somehow Tom managed to keep the paps away from you that day, and you were very grateful for that

since the two of you had started dating one year before, a lot of bad comments had been left under the pics which portrayed you and your boyfriend. you acted like you couldn’t care less -and it was true, in a certain way- but in the days you were at your low you remembered that Tom Holland, aka the youngest Spiderman, could have had any girl on the planet, surely more beautiful than you

you had never had problems accepting your body, you had never wandered of changing your appearances only to be liked by someone, you firmly believed that what you had inside was way more important than a size 2

but then you also remembered why it was you with him, and no one else

you and Tom had always shared a special connection -when you were friends and after, when you became girlfriend and boyfriend

he had told you numerous timed how you were irreplaceable for him and how you let him felt at ease, when he came back home after a long and exhausting day at work

what you didn’t expected from him on your anniversary, or St. Valentine’s Day, was it to be for you two only -no brothers, friends, parents, neither his agent had the possibility to reach out for him

you spent it together, like he had planned on doing, and a smile was plastered over your face for the entire length of it

now, it wasn’t new for you to end up flirting, but that day something really took upon you and Tom

you could no longer hold it back, you found it hard to keep your hands off of the other’s body and when you hand wandered on Tom’s upper tight you silently agreed on heading back home

the drive back home was painfully long and it did nothing but increase the sexual tension between you two

you didn’t know how it started, but in the lift you found yourself pinned against the cold, metal-made wall. your hands quickly found their way to the back of Tom’s neck and your fingers started to play with his hair, occasionally pulling it

Tom’s hands were all over your body, drawing you closer to him, feeling you -just to make sure it wasn’t his best dream, one hand then went grabbing the back of your neck in order to keep you in place as his lips left yours and went down to your jawline, your neck, and your shoulder -left naked by the dress you were wearing

“are you sure?” was what you heard him asking between a kiss and another “do you want to do this?”

“never have I wanted something more than this” was you reply as you exited the lift and quickly moved forward the door of his flat

clothes were scattered all across the living room and all the way to the bedroom, where Tom gently pushed you towards the bed

he hovered you and took his time to admire your hair spread over his pillow, your irises being slightly reflecting the moonlight, and your lips partially opened, already swollen and reddish

your first time would be all about worshipping your body, making you feel at ease, and, most importantly, letting you get used to the situation

“tell me if it hurts” would be what Tom had repeated you the mostly during the night

you had had your intimate moments, though you had never got any step further a little not-so-innocent touch every now and then

you were nervous but your will to make love with the man you loved was more powerful

Tom took the cue and decided to lead the way

he left sweet kissed on the area just above your pelvis and went down, up to your clit which he began sucking and licking with the perfect pace for you to reach you high almost immediately

almost

“not yet, my love” he widened your legs and placed himself between them, then he took his cock in his hand and gave it a few strokes before alining it to your entrance

you felt the tip brushing your lips and closed your eyes, overwhelmed by the amazing sensation

“you tell me when it is too much” once Tom saw you nodding at his direction, he focused his attention on what was happening between your bare bodies

he would slowly slide inside your wet folds and your breath would stuck in your throat as you felt his length in you

“breathe” he would remind you while coming to a stop

since he was leaving you time to adjust to his size, he began giving you kisses on you forehead, your nose, your cheeks, and he would definitely spending more time on your lips

“you can move” was all what you needed to say for him to begin thrusting slowly inside you

Tom would just be so careful not to hurt you, though it was rather difficult to focus on you while he was seeing your tits bouncing up and down at every thrust

he had always been attracted by your tits, even though he had never showed it to you

until that moment

you gasped when Tom’s hand approached on of your nipples and gently stimulated it with his fingertips. deciding it wasn’t enough, he bent over and started licking and sucking it, as if his life depended on it

you would bite your lower lip and at that, together with your face scrunched up in a frown of pleasure, Tom couldn’t resist

“will you cum for me, darling?” it was nothing more than a question pronounced with clenched teeth, as he tried to holding himself back from summing before you

in order to speed the process his thumb reached your clit and began running circles on it at an ungodly pace

“god, I’m close, Tom” you didn’t expect from him to go even fast, both with his thumb and his cock buried inside you

you came in the following thirty seconds and him right after you

the aftercare would include hugs, peck on your faces, as you both try to catch your breaths, and what you loved the most was that Tom held you against his chest and had the both of you wrapped in a red blanket 

“I love you”

“I love you, too, darling”

[stellarstarwarsimagines]

Mine

Pairing - Anakin Skywalker x Reader

Summary - Fuck buddies is always a good arrangement right? No one ever catches feelings from that . . . At least that’s what you're telling yourself. 

Word Count - 1.7k

Warnings - Some spicy situations and some language. 

It wasn’t supposed to be something more. 

The two of you were close friends, both single, and had a need to get out frustrations when lightsaber combat or meditation wasn’t doing it anymore. It seemed like the logical conclusion. It wouldn’t even be against the Jedi Code as long as you two weren’t “attached” to each other. 

Even though you were fairly sure the two of you already were. 

That was also what made it the perfect arrangement. Since the two of you were such close friends, a little thing like sex wasn’t going to get in the way of that. If it turned out horribly, neither of you had to speak of it again, and you could go on being the close friends you always were. If it went well . . . there would be the option for it to . . . keep going well, and both of you would be less stressed, frustrated, and you could stop going to the trouble to find someone else to vent out excess energy. 

Of course . . . it had gone a little too well. 

It wasn’t your first time, and you weren’t sure if it was his or not. You didn’t think it would be right to ask, afraid it might make him nervous. After all, you expected some awkwardness anyway since the two of you had never even so much as kissed. 

You had been so, so wrong. 

That was one of the many thoughts flying through your head as you lay next to Anakin Skywalker on your bed in Coruscant, body drenched in sweat after he not only spent what must have been hours, since the sun was close to coming up, eating you out, but fucking you so thoroughly you were afraid if you stood up your legs wouldn’t be able to hold you. 

He was in a similar state next to you, but you were sure you didn’t look anything like he did. Hair disheveled, bare chest glistening with sweat and kiss swollen lips, you weren’t sure he had ever looked more attractive in his life, and he looked ridiculously attractive all the time. Almost as if he could feel your eyes on him, he turned his head, looking at you with a soft expression that didn’t match the roughness with which the two of you had just fucked. “When are you coming back from your next mission?” was all he asked. 

Yeah, you couldn’t help but think this might turn out bad, but also, looking at him and thinking about what the two of you had done . . . You couldn’t bring yourself to care. 

____________________

You didn’t want to admit it was something more. 

Anakin and you had always been the closest of friends. The fact that your relationship was now physical as well didn’t mean you were falling in love with him. You weren’t falling in love with him. It was normal for friends to be concerned about each other when they were going into dangerous situations. Specifically when they were going to a place as dangerous as the citadel. 

It was normal. 

Anakin met your eyes across the table, and he gave you a look, his eyes flickering with an emotion you couldn’t, and were too afraid to name. You gave him a subtle tilt of your head, and he knew what you meant. 

Not ten minutes after the meeting was over, Anakin’s lips were leaving feverish kisses against your neck, tearing at your tunic in an attempt to kiss as much of your skin as possible. The sound of ripping fabric, especially when you knew you were going to have to walk out of this room at some point, would have pissed you off, but not today. Today you clutched him closer, tugged on his hair, pushed him out of his clothes as fast as possible in case . . . 

You weren’t going to think about that. 

Instead, you slipped a hand inside of Anakin’s robes until you found him hard and thick, more than ready for you. You stroked him until he was panting against your skin, his hands tightening so much that you knew there would be bruises. 

A sharp contrast to his hands, his lips softened, a flutter against your jawline. “What do you want?” He asked, his tone way too gentle for what the two of you were doing in this dark room. 

What did you want? You knew that Anakin was asking in terms of this exact moment, but instead your mind drifted to a more general place. When this had first started between the two of you months ago, what you had wanted was a release, something you could do that was both pleasurable, and a catharsis from the everyday stress of war and being a Jedi. 

Was that what you wanted now? 

“You,” you said, a simple answer that would satisfy both questions, and you dropped to your knees in the small closet, locking your eyes on him as you took him inside of your mouth. 

There weren't any more opportunities for questions after that considering how busy your mouth was and the stream of expletives coming from Anakin’s as his hand tightened painfully in your hair. 

It was a good distraction from the growing feelings in your chest. 

____________________

It was something more. 

You knocked on his door, your hair all over the place, your eyes puffy and bloodshot from all the crying, but anger that you knew you shouldn’t be feeling coursing through your veins. 

For a moment you thought he wasn’t going to answer, but he did. You took in the sight of him, looking as out of sorts as you did, but with a couple of bruises marring his beautiful skin. 

“What the hell was that, Anakin?” You asked, shoving him out of the way and into his room. Once you had entered, you turned to face him once more, your arms crossed over your chest. “You almost got yourself killed!” 

Anakin shut the door behind him and barely spared you a glance as he made his way over to the small kitchen in his quarters. “I don’t care.” He answered, getting out two glasses and beginning to start up his caff machine. 

His words made you freeze in disbelief for a moment. He didn’t care? He didn’t care that he almost got himself killed? You couldn’t even imagine life without him at this point, and he’s saying he wouldn’t care if he got killed? “Well maybe you don’t care, but I do.” You told him, watching the way his shoulders tensed at your words. “I can’t -” You cut yourself off before you could say the words that were swirling around in your chest, knowing they wouldn’t be appropriate, and cleared your throat. “I can’t even understand why you interfered in the first place. You know I can take care of myself.” 

Anakin’s hands gripped the countertop, and you watched as the knuckles on his human hand turned white at the tension. “It looked like he was taking care of you from where I was standing.” 

It all clicked into place, and your eyes widened in recognition. Anakin hadn’t broken up the exchange because he was worried you couldn’t defend yourself. Anakin had intervened because he was jealous. The man had been flirting with you pretty heavily, but you had never dreamed that it would have affected Anakin to see someone else flirting with you. Him having feelings like that broke every rule that you had been trying to keep in place for so long. “Ani . . .”

“Don’t say my name like that.” He snapped, still not facing you. 

You took a step closer to him, biting your bottom lip. “Like what?” 

He turned around so fast you almost took a step backwards in surprise. “Like you’re not feeling what I’m feeling.” 

You didn’t want to look at him. Instead, you tilted your head to the ground, pretending to look at your fingers. “It’s not . . . We promised each other this wouldn’t happen.” 

“Look me in the eyes.” 

You couldn’t. All you could do was watch his feet as they stopped closer to you. 

“Look me in the eyes, and tell me -” It was harder to breathe when he was this close. Even more so when you felt his hand slip into your hair, tugging it back until your head tilted up, and you could do nothing but look him in those deep blue eyes swimming with emotion. “Tell me you don’t feel anything for me.” 

His eyes searched your face, looking for what you had hidden there. For so long you had kept those feelings out of sight, determined to not let them show. So many bad things could come from them after all. But you knew that Anakin could see them. He had always been able to break down your defenses like they were made of nothing but air. 

Then you felt a flicker in the Force, a tug on one of the strings that connected you to all living things. This string in particular? Anakin’s. You grasped at his robes, anchoring yourself to him as he let his emotions flood through the connection, anger, the smallest bit of fear, worry, but most prevalently . . . 

An unconditional, unfaltering, deep love for you. 

“I can’t.” You whimpered in response, overwhelmed with his emotions and your own. “I can’t say it.” You told him, shaking your head back and forth. 

Anakin barely let you get the words out before his fervent lips were kissing you, bruising in their intensity. He pushed you up against a nearby wall, his whole body almost smothering you in his warmth. 

You tugged at his robes, shoving them off his shoulders, desperate to feel the touch of his hot skin against your own. He obliged, helping you take them off, and soon your hands were gliding across his arms and biceps up to his broad shoulders. He felt so good. He always felt so good and satisfying and perfect under your hands no matter if it was like it was now or a gentle touch of reassurance given sparingly under watchful eyes. It always felt right. 

You gasped when Anakin’s lips pulled away from you to leave kisses down the center of your neck, ripping the neckline of your clothing apart under his fingers. “You’re mine. No one else can touch you like this except me.” Anakin mumbled against your skin, sending shivers throughout your body in the most pleasurable way. 

“Yours,” you agreed, your voice breathless. “Always yours.” You added, and then your lips were otherwise occupied once again. 

It was definitely something more. 

[larksthighs]

drivers license

Word Count: 4.8k

Based off of drivers license by Olivia Rodrigo

I got my driver’s license last week

Just like we always talked about

‘Cause you were so excited for me

To finally drive up to your house

“Stop!”

You slammed on the breaks, turning to glare at Rafe for his sudden exclamation. He has his left hand on the dashboard and the right gripping the handle on the roof above the passenger side door. He looked at you with wide eyes, his gelled hair slightly falling over his forehead and into his eyes.

“What?” You exclaimed, annoyed at his overly dramatic reaction.

“Did you seriously not see the mailbox? You almost took it completely out!”

“You promised you wouldn’t yell at me! I’m trying, okay?” You exclaimed, exasperated. This is the fourth time he’s yelled at you in the past 30 minutes, and while almost hitting a mailbox may permit some yelling, the other times didn’t.

You thought having Rafe teach you to drive would be a good idea, having been friends with him since fourth grade. Your dad is best friends with Ward which led to you and Rafe hanging out together at every family party and business event that you were forced to attend. You and Rafe would always sneak out of the parties in order to escape all of the meaningless conversations that your dads managed to drag you into, claiming that it would help you in the future, and maybe it would, but at nine years old, the future wasn’t exactly on your mind.

This pattern continued on throughout all of middle and high school. You and Rafe were always best friends and were even each other’s first kiss, something that you both agreed would never happen again after the painfully awkward first time. Little did you know that at 17 years old, you would have a huge crush on Rafe, something that 11 year old you would be cringing at.

“I know, I know. Okay, one more time. All you have to do is turn into the driveway and then park between the cones in front of the garage. And remember to swing wide this time so I don’t have to explain to Rose why her mailbox is destroyed,” he says, relaxing back into his seat.

You brush him off with a ‘yeah, yeah’ before checking your rearview mirror so you could back up and attempt the turn into the driveway again. You swing wide in order to avoid the mailbox and start down the driveway, slowing down when you reach the concrete. You carefully start to pull between the ‘cones’ Rafe had set up for you, really just a random basketball and a weight he had found in the garage.

You pull in as straight as you can and then put the car in park, looking over as Rafe gets out of the passenger seat and walks to the back of the car. You watch him nervously, hoping that you were finally able to park straight and without hitting one of the cones. So far, you haven’t had much luck.

Looking in the rearview mirror, you make eye contact with Rafe who has a face completely void of emotion before he breaks into a big smile and gives you a thumbs up. You let out a squeal then unbuckle and hop out of the driver’s side.

“I did it! I finally did it!” you exclaim with joy, finally feeling some relief at the thought of finally being able to pass a mock driver’s test.

“Hell yeah!” Rafe exclaims, catching you as you jump on him in a hug, “Before you know it you’ll be driving up to my house all on your own.”

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Best driving instructor ever!” you exclaim with a smile across your face, pulling back to look him in the eyes.

It felt like time stood still as you stared into his blue eyes. Both of you were breathing slightly heavy due to the excitement you both felt. You still had your arms wrapped around his neck and he slowly slid you back down so your feet were touching the ground again. Your arms slowly slid from his neck until your hands were resting against his chest, still looking into his eyes. It felt like the world stood still as you both stared into each other’s eyes while exchanging soft smiles.

Nothing could ruin this moment.

And you’re probably with that blonde girl

Who always made me doubt

She’s so much older than me

She’s everything I’m insecure about

With Rafe being as attractive as he is, seeing him with girls is inevitable. Girls seem to stick to him like flies everywhere he goes, so it wasn’t a surprise to see him with a senior girl named Aspen at the boneyard.

Aspen was two years older than you and you definitely get a little jealous to see her hanging with Rafe, especially since he had ditched you right when you got here, claiming that he was going to go get a drink. Fifteen minutes later and you’re watching him talk to her while Topper and Kelce are having a conversation about boats or cars or something. Honestly, you stopped listening right when it came up, not finding any interest in the subject.

Now all of your attention was on Rafe and Aspen and her group of friends that were all hanging around in a circle by the keg. Of course, you could walk over there and join the conversation but sometimes your insecurities got in the way.

Aspen was easily one of the nicest girls you had ever met. She never had one mean word to say about anyone and she always welcomed everyone with open arms, whether they were a kook or a pogue, it made no difference to her. She also had a beautiful body with naturally blonde wavy hair that never seemed unruly, even on a windy night at the beach. She was basically your definition of beauty and had a personality to match it, which made it so much harder to be jealous.

It would be so much easier if she was one of the kooks who hated the pogues or who thought she was better than everyone because of her money, but she was the complete opposite. You couldn’t even pretend to not like her because there wasn’t a reason to, which was so frustrating. But honestly, if you can’t have him then you want to make sure that he has someone who will treat him well and take care of him, which is why you want to leave him and Aspen alone. Of course, you’d rather it be you with him, but there’s only so much you can do.

“Hellooo? Are you listening? We asked you a question,” Topper says while waving his hand in front of your face. You slap it away with a scowl on your face before asking him to repeat what he said.

“We asked why you’re so spaced out tonight. You’re usually off mingling with anyone and everyone who will stop to talk to you,” Kelce said while giving you a strange look.

You easily became friends with the boys shortly after Rafe introduced you to them and over the past eight years, you have all gotten to know each other pretty well, which includes being able to pick up on the smallest ticks that let you know when someone isn’t acting like themself. So of course it means that the boys were able to pick up on your lack of attention, but hopefully not on the fact that all of it is directed towards Rafe and Aspen.

“I’m fine,” you said giving them a soft smile, “just tired. It was a long day today and I think the heat just made me sleepy. I actually think I might head home now, I’ll see you guys later.”

You get up and start to walk away, hearing the objections coming from Topper and Kelce but just turning around and giving them a small smile and wave before making your way off the beach and towards the road.

You take one last look at Rafe and notice him laughing while he and Aspen lean into each other in order to be able to hear their conversation over the crowd around them.

To be honest, you’re kind of disappointed that he didn’t notice you leaving because he was too busy talking to a girl. It’s not that he’s talking to a girl, he does that all the time and sometimes you even encourage him despite feeling your heart ache every time you do it. It’s more the fact that he told you he would be right back, but he never came or asked you to come with him.

It also hurts your feelings a bit because you somehow always fool yourself into thinking that Rafe may have feelings for you too. There are always little moments where you make eye contact with him and it feels like the world stops spinning and like it’s only you two in the moment, just for one of you to awkwardly break it and continue on as if nothing happened. There are the little touches and flirting but you can also just chalk that up to regular affection from being so close to Rafe. You always jokingly flirt with Kelce and Topper too and while you obviously didn’t like them, it would make sense if Rafe thought that you were doing the same thing with him.

You finish your walk home and get a shower before laying in bed and checking your phone, noticing that there are texts from Topper and Kelce making sure you got home safe, but not one from Rafe, which was odd considering he was your ride so you figured that he would have noticed you were gone by now, but apparently not.

You decide to send a quick text to Rafe to let him know you made it home so he wouldn’t be searching for you and then put your phone down and went to bed.

Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs

‘Cause how could I ever love someone else?

Waking up the day after the boneyard party you check your phone to see that Rafe hadn’t replied to your message but had read it. You decide to get up and get ready for the day before heading over to the Cameron house, figuring that Rafe was probably hungover and still asleep.

You stop on the way to Rafe’s and grab a coffee for you and him, also picking up a breakfast sandwich for him in case he needed some greasy food in his stomach. It was a habit that you guys had gotten into over the years after a night of partying lead to both of you going to a cafe early the next morning in order to cure your hangovers. You hop back in your car and start the short drive over with the windows down and music blasting. It was a beautiful day out and you were hoping that Rafe would be able to convince Topper to take you guys out on the boat today.

You were driving down the road to Rafe’s house and slowed down when you got to the driveway. You were about to pull into the driveway when you noticed a car that isn’t usually there. A black Jeep Wrangler with stickers on the back window that looked like they were from surf shops and a monogram that looked familiar. You see this Jeep at school all the time and know it belongs to Aspen.

You don’t know why you feel so hurt when you see it, but you do. Obviously seeing another girl at your crush’s house isn’t the best feeling, but you didn’t expect it to hurt this bad.

Well, you know why he didn’t answer your text last night, he must’ve been a little too busy. You decide not to go in the driveway, slowly driving past it before turning around and making your way back to your house. You decide to call Topper on your way back asking what he was doing. When he tells you he isn’t busy, you make your way to his house.

You pull into his driveway and then grab the coffee and sandwich that was originally for Rafe before walking to the front door and ringing the doorbell, waiting for Topper to answer. When he finally does you give him a quick hug before walking to the kitchen table for him to eat his breakfast.

“Not that I don’t enjoy the breakfast and coffee, because I really do, but why did you bring it to me? Isn’t this usually you and Rafe’s thing?” he asks before taking a bite into his sandwich. You make a face at him as he takes a bite that was way too big and starts chewing obnoxiously.

“Yes, it usually is our thing but he had some… company with him this morning. Aspen’s Jeep was there so I figured that I shouldn’t intrude,” you say while giving a soft smile and fiddling with your keys that are sitting on the table in front of you.

“I’m sure they wouldn’t have minded if you brought them breakfast,” Topper says.

“Yeah but hanging out with Rafe and a girl he hooked up with the night before doesn’t exactly fit my description of a perfect morning,” you say sarcastically while rolling your eyes.

Topper raises his eyebrows slightly and his eyes go wide.

“Wait a minute… You’re jealous! You’re jealous of Aspen being over there,” he says with a little laugh. “Don’t worry, I don’t think she’ll take the position of best friend after one night together.”

“That’s not the position I’m worried about her taking,” you mumble under your breath. Topper stops in the middle of bringing his sandwich to his mouth.

“Oh shit. You actually like him don’t you?” he asks, shocked.

“Yeah, honestly I’m surprised it took you this long to figure out, it’s only been like four years,” you reply with a little laugh.

“Yeah well I figured it was just a small crush, I didn’t think it was actually anything serious,” he says with a shrug, “are you gonna tell him?”

“Considering what I saw this morning, no. I think if he liked me back then we would’ve figured it out by now, we have little moments together but they don’t seem to be anything serious. Besides, Aspen is a good match for him, she’s really sweet and she’ll keep his attitude in check, match made in heaven right?”

“I mean, I guess,” he shrugs, “sorry you had to see that, I know it sucks.”

You’re happy you had Topper to talk about this with, you know he can relate after the situation with John B and Sarah happened.

“Yeah but I mean, what can you do? Anyways, enough depressing talk. Do you want to take me on the boat today?” you ask, giving him a big smile that you hoped would convince him to take you. You can tell he’s hesitating and you dramatically try to persuade him, “Please Topper, I need something to distract me from this heartbreak, and I brought you breakfast! Wasn’t that so nice of me?”

“Okay, first off, I was your second choice for breakfast so that argument doesn’t work. Second off, do you really classify this as heartbreak?” he questions, “but yes, I will take you on the boat today.”

“Yes! Thank you! You’ll be my first choice for breakfast and coffee next time, promise.”

You call Kelce and he meets you at Topper’s house where all three of you get on the boat and start heading out to a sandbar where you guys will be able to swim and hangout. You also had Kelce buy Truly Lemonades on the way over so you could drink on your day out.

You and the boys spent the afternoon swimming around and hanging out with some other friends who brought their boats out on the water. Music was blaring and it was a perfect sunny day and the water was just the right temperature and nothing could make it a better boat day. It really was just what you needed in order to take your mind off of the Rafe situation.

As it got later in the day and the sun started to set, everyone started to head in. You were sitting on the front of Topper’s boat enjoying the final hour of sunlight and enjoying the breeze on your sunburnt skin. As you enter the channel and get closer to Topper’s house you go to the back of the boat where the boys' seats are. Since Topper is driving you squeeze yourself into the seat with Kelce and start asking the boys about dinner plans, wondering if they wanted to go to The Wreck with you once you got back in.

“I think we should go, I’ll pay, it'll be the perfect end to a perfect boat day. Plus I want to spend more time with my best friends, I love you guys,” you say sappily while wrapping your arms around Kelce’s neck and leaning your head on his shoulder. You are definitely tipsy from the lemonades that you drank throughout the day. “Also, I need a ride because I can’t drive anywhere in this state.”

“We’ll go out to dinner with you drunkie,” Topper says with a playful eye roll, “and you don’t have to pay for us, we got it.”

You give him a big smile, your head feeling light from the drinks you had. You were laughing at the conversation the boys were having but you stopped when you caught sight of Rafe’s backyard. He and Aspen were in the backyard but you could tell they were wet like they had just gotten out of the pool. She was sitting in a pool chair and he was sitting at the end of it with his hand on her knee. They were both smiling at each other and laughing at whatever was said, looking insanely happy.

By now Topper and Kelce had noticed you looking over at Rafe’s yard. Kelce squeezed you with the arm that was around your waist in order to keep you in the seat and Topper squeezed your knee that was closest to him, both giving you sympathetic smiles. Throughout the day you had managed to update Kelce on the situation and now they both know about your crush and why you were so spaced out at the boneyard last night.

“I’m sorry bud,” Kelce said quietly, “I know it sucks but it’ll get easier. Either that or he’ll get his head out of his ass and realize you’ve been right in front of him the whole time.”

“I appreciate the optimism Kelcey Welcey,” he rolls his eyes at your nickname for him while you smile, enjoying teasing him.

You slowly pull up to Topper’s dock where he and Kelce grab the ropes from the dock and tie them to the cleats before hopping off of the boat. You grab your bag and towel before the three of you head up to Topper’s house, hopping in Kelce’s car to go to The Wreck.

And I know we weren’t perfect

But I’ve never felt this way for no one

What Kelce and Topper don’t know, is that you and Rafe had a fling last summer. It only lasted for about three months, but those three months felt like pure bliss to you. You had decided to end it when school started again because you both were busy and it became a little overwhelming.

The relationship itself was everything you wanted, but there were rough patches. With Rafe being so hardheaded, there were a lot of times when you tried to reason with him but he just couldn’t see where you were coming from.

“I just don’t see what the big deal is! It’s not like I’m addicted, I just use it when I need to relax a little, you know my dad has been on my case recently,” Rafe tries to explain. Recently he’s been making visits to Barry more frequently and it’s starting to worry you.

“But Rafe, it can escalate so quickly, and the more you do it, the harder it’s going to be to quit. You should switch the weed at least, it’s not addictive and there aren’t bad side effects,” you try to convince him. If he feels that he needs a drug to help him then you won’t be able to change that, but you can try to get him to use one that isn’t as hard on his body.

“I’m not gonna get addicted,” Rafe scoffs, “I don’t do it enough to get addicted, so please stop bugging me about it.”

The harsh tone of his voice makes you flinch. You didn’t want to upset him and you hate feeling like you’re stepping on toes, especially knowing about the hard time he’s been having with his dad recently.

“I’m just worried about you babe,” you say softly while reaching for his hand. You’re sitting on his bed and he’s pacing around in front of you. He stops when he hears you say that and walks over to you, grabbing your hand and pulling you up to stand in front of you. He wraps you in his arms and squeezes you tight as you nuzzle your head into his chest.

“I know and I’m sorry, I’ll try to stop,” he said while resting his chin on top of your head. You gently rub your hands up and down his back, letting them drag to the side and resting on his hips as you step back to look at him. You give him a soft smile before bringing your hands up to rest on his cheeks, softly kissing him.

After that conversation, he slowly stopped doing bumps every time Ward got onto him. It was hard on him but you tried to spend as much time with him as possible because Ward was less likely to get angry when you were around.

Throughout the weeks it took him to stop, you got to know Rafe on a deeper level than you had before. Practically living with someone really allows you to see every little detail about them and you start to pick up on the little mannerisms that they have. You didn’t think you could like Rafe more than you did, especially because you know living with someone really shows how they actually act and is usually make or break for most relationships, but during the time you lived with him is when you realized how much you actually liked, maybe even loved, him.

You know your relationship with him wasn’t perfect, but you haven’t felt that way for anyone else and you aren’t sure if you ever will. You know you’re still young but he will always hold a special place in your heart since he was your best friend before your boyfriend. No matter what he will always be your number one.

And I just can’t imagine

How you could be so okay now that I’m gone

It’s been three weeks since the night at the boneyard and the communication between you and Rafe has been pretty low. You guys still text every day but he takes longer to reply and leaves you on read more often than not. He always seems to be busy every time you ask him to hang out with you too. It’s kind of starting to drain you if you’re being honest, it’s getting tiring being the only one who’s trying to keep your friendship alive. It seems that all of your attempts are failing and it’s been affecting you a lot recently. You and Rafe were always texting, whether it was about what you had for lunch or new gossip on the island or new clothes you got and now all you were getting was radio silence from his end.

You know that you need to talk to him soon or else your emotions are going to keep bubbling up until you get to a point where you won’t be able to forgive him. You send him a text around lunchtime.

To Rafe: hey, do you want me to get lunch from the wreck and bring it over? I need to talk to you, it’s important

You wait five minutes before you hear a ping come from your phone, you pick it up and get a heavy feeling in your chest as you read the message.

From Rafe: sorry but I can’t, dad has me meeting a business partner today

To Rafe: that’s fine, are you free tonight?

From Rafe: I don’t know.

You leave him on read after that. It hurts your feelings a little but you decide to ignore it since Ward is probably affecting his mood, he always got really agitated around him.

You decide to head to The Wreck anyway because you’re hungry and you figure that going by yourself will give you time to think and clear your head a little. You ride over there with the windows down and Tom Petty blasting on the radio, breathing in the ocean air. It was a relaxing ride and just what you needed to help calm you down a little.

You pull into the parking lot and put your car in park, rolling up the windows. You unplug your phone from the charger before grabbing your wallet and heading inside the restaurant. When you walk in you see Kie standing behind the counter and walk over to say hi.

“Hey Kie, what’s up?”

“Hey! I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever! You don’t come by as much anymore,” she says while leaning her arms on the counter in front of her, leaning closer to you.

“Yeah well, that’s a long story,” you say with a sarcastic chuckle.

“Well I get off in 10 and then we have all of the time in the world, I can join you for lunch if you want?” she asks.

“Yeah of course! I’ll just wait for you,” you say with a smile, walking over to a table that seats two people. You pull out your chair and get on your phone, waiting for Kie to come sit with you. When she pulls her chair out she sits down with a smile before leaning her elbow on the table with her chin in her hand.

“So, what’s the story?”

You start diving into the story about Rafe and Aspen at the boneyard and all of the other times you saw them together. You also include how he hasn’t been answering your texts and when he does they’re so dry that you can’t respond to them.

As your wrapping up your story with the news about today’s events and how he couldn’t meet you because of the business meeting with his dad, you see Kie pause and her face drop. She takes her chin out of her hand and crosses her arms on the table in front of her.

“I hate to break it to you, but I don’t think he had a business meeting with his dad today,” Kie says, looking at you sympathetically before looking over your shoulder again.

You turn to look over your shoulder, seeing Rafe walk in with Aspen. They were both coming from the dock and were wearing bathing suits while Aspen had wet hair, telling you that they had clearly come here on a boat. He was definitely not on a lunch break from a business meeting.

Rafe looks up and catches your eyes before awkwardly looking away again, directing his attention back to Aspen. You turn back around to Kie, feeling embarrassed. You had just told her how he was at a business meeting only for him to show up with Aspen, you feel kind of humiliated for believing him if your being honest. It felt like a punch in the gut.

At this point, you and Kie had already finished your lunch and you paid for yours before looking up at her with tears in your eyes.

“Can we leave?” you ask, “we can head to the beach or something, I just don’t want to be here anymore.”

She nods sympathetically and then you both stand up and start walking towards the door, looking back one last time before you walk out of the door, only to see that Rafe’s attention isn’t on you at all, it’s all on her.

When you make it to the beach, Kie sits with you in silence for a little while. She knew you needed someone to be with you and it was therapeutic to listen to the waves crashing on the shore and to watch the birds flying by. After a while, you felt a tear run down your face before you look over at Kie and sniffle.

“How is he so okay now that I’m gone? I mean look at me,” you let out a sad laugh before wiping under your eyes. Kie wraps her arm around your shoulder and you lean into her, watching as the waves crash and wondering what you’re going to do without Rafe.

[marvelslut16]

I missed you, Doll

Prompt number: 13 “I missed this”

Fandom: Marvel 

Paring: 40s!Bucky Barnes x reader

Rating: G

Word count: 1.7k

Warnings: mentions of arranged marriage, spinsters, and 

A/N: Like always, I procrastinated so this isn’t really up to my standards. I really wanted to use a lot more 40s slang but I was running out of time. Either way, first time writing for 40s Bucky, and Bucky in general, but I absolutely love 40s Bucky. Also slight AU I suppose since Hydra and the serum don’t exist in this story. 

Growing up being best friends with Steve and Bucky caused many in the neighborhood to look down upon you, the older women in the neighborhood found it unbecoming that a  young lady was spending her time with boys. Their distaste for you only seemed to grow when you started to wear trousers in your teenage years, that way you could keep up with Bucky and you could move around easier to defend Steve. Now in your early twenties your neighbors consider you to be a spinster. 

You were about to practically beg Stevie to marry you, your parents would never approve but at least that way they would get off your back, but they arranged for you to marry a man fresh out of the army. His name is Bernard, he’s in his early forties and with just a few chaperoned dates you could tell he had an alcohol problem, a souse. He made it very clear that he didn’t like pants on a lady and if you ever wanted a proposal from him that you would have to wear skirts and dresses only. Your parents heard the ultimatum and burned every pair of trousers in your possession, leaving you with no other option than the flowy garments. After your parents forced you to say yes to his proposal Bernard forbade you from seeing Steve, your best friend and last connection to Bucky.

Every night you would cry yourself to sleep to the picture of Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, the edges frayed from how often you clutched it. The picture was never far from your reach, always keeping it by your side tucked into a pocket of your handbag. Bernard didn’t know of the photo and neither did your parents, Bucky would send your letters to Steve’s apartment knowing they wouldn’t be intercepted by your overbearing parents that way. 

Bucky Barnes was a dream boat, he had women practically throwing themselves at his feet, even the married women. He would flirt with you constantly, but he flirted with every woman so you didn’t let it get to your head, especially when he started to date Dot before he was deployed. Much like every other woman you fell for Bucky and his charm, especially the caring side only you and Steve saw first hand. You had hoped that over the years his feelings would grow to match your own, but he never seemed to want to settle down, especially with you. 

Your father is throwing a party today, one where he officially announces to your relatives that you're engaged to Bernard and to be married by the end of the year. You can’t help but hide in a quiet corner and cry, you imagined this day since you were a child and none of it was how you imagined. Your father wasn’t announcing your engagement to Bucky, Steve by his side- he wasn’t even invited to the party. And neither was Rebecca Barnes, your best friend besides the boys and practically your sister. 

A knock on the door pulls you away from your silent tears, figuring it’s another guest for your party. You stand and flatten your blue dress with white polka dots and wipe your eyes with your gloved fingers, before faking a smile and opening the door. The figure on the other side of said door is the last person you ever expected to see again. Standing before you in all his glory is Bucky still in uniform, he looks stronger and even more handsome than when he left almost a year ago. 

Before you can say anything he swoops you into a hug, lifting you from the ground and spinning you around happily. When he sets you back on your feet he keeps his arms wrapped firmly around your waist, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You bury your own face into his strong shoulder, trying not to shake and alert him to the tears falling from your eyes. 

“I missed this,” he murmurs into your hair, strong arms pulling you impossibly closer to him. “I missed you, doll.”

“I missed you too, Bucky,” your voice breaks, Bucky tries to pull away to see what’s wrong when he hears this. But you won’t let him. You just want a few more moments of bliss before you're never allowed to see him or be in his arms again. 

“You stopped writing to me doll, why?” hurt laces his voice, causing your shoulders to shake as tears stream harder and faster. This time Bucky successfully pulls away slightly, right hand reaching up to caress your face, his calloused thumb wiping the tears away as they fall. “Steve and Rebecca both told me I needed to come see for myself when they picked me up from the station earlier. But you look fine, beautiful even, even if you aren’t in trousers. I wrote to you last month hoping you’d be there to pick me up. 

“(Y/N), sweetheart, who’s at the door?” before you can tell Bucky of the new developments, Bernard’s voice pulls you away from Bucky. You take a giant step away from the man you love, his face falls as his hand slips from your cheek, you look at the ground in hopes to calm your nerves and stop your tears. 

“Who are you?” there’s malice in Bucky’s voice as Bernard rounds the corner and into the front room with you and Bucky.

“I’m Bernard, (Y/N)’s future husband,” Bernard glares up at Bucky, turning to you and kissing you on the cheek, the stench of alcohol rolling off of him in waves. You try to pull away from his chapped lips but his arm snakes around your waist to keep you close, hand too close to your rear for your liking. “Who are you?”

“Sergeant James Barnes,” Bucky straightens his back and squares his shoulders, towering over Bernard in hopes to intimidate the older man. “I’m (Y/N)’s best friend and I was hoping to speak with her, seeing as how I just got home.”

“Seeing as she’s promised to me,” you let out a yelp as Bernard’s fingers dig painfully into your hip bone. “I’m afraid that’s inappropriate and I cannot allow it.”

“(Y/N) who’s at the door?” you father calls, too busy squirming trying to get out of Bernard’s hold you don’t answer him. He soon rounds the corner, eyes widening as he sees who's at the door. 

“Mr. (Y/L/N),” Bucky’s voice is strained as he glares at your father, his face softens as he turns to look at you. “Doll, tell me he’s treating you well and I’ll be on my way.”

“He’s not,” Bernard's grip so tightly you're surprised he hasn’t broken your bone or his fingers. “I can’t marry him Bucky, I tried to say no. No to marrying him, no to going on dates, but they forced me to.”

Bucky’s jaw ticks as he grinds his teeth down hard. He reaches forward, roughly grabbing Bernard’s hand and removing it from your waist, and gently pulling you into his arms. The sergeant’s deadly glare leaves Bernard and lands on your father. 

“You knew of my intentions with your daughter,” you know he’s fighting to keep his voice low so as not to alert the guests in the other rooms of the house. “And you still tried to arrange her to marry someone else while I was gone?”

“What are you talking about,” you rest your hand on Bucky’s chest as you stare hopefully into his crystal blue eyes. 

“I would like to know that too,” Bernard glares at both men in the room. 

“Before I left,” Bucky pushes a stray hair away from your eyes, talking to you as if you're the only in the room with him. “I made my intentions clear to your father that when I got home, if you’d have me that is, I wanted to marry you.”

“You do?” tears start to well up in your eyes, but for the first time in a long time they’re happy tears. Bucky nods, calloused thumb caressing your cheek again. “What about Dot? You two seemed to be going steady before you left.”

“She was in love with her milkman, and I was in love with you,” Bucky rests his forehead on yours. “I wanted to keep it a secret, ask you to marry me in person. But I couldn't wait any longer so I asked you in a letter, but then you stopped responding and I was worried I scared you off.”

“You could never scare me off Buck,” your hands slide up his chest and into the short strands of his chestnut hair. “I love you too much for that. Why else would I put up with you all these years?”

For the second time today, Bucky lifts you off your feet and twirls you around. “You’re making me the happiest man alive,” Bucky murmurs as he sets your giggling self down. “So doll, (Y/N), the love of my life, my best friend, would you put me out of my misery and be my wife?”

Bucky drops to his knee and pulls out the ring Steve brought to the station with him earlier, the ring Bucky bought for you before being shipped off, the ring that he wanted to give you before he left but he didn’t have your father’s permission. The diamond glints on the rays of sunlight streaming in from the picture window in the room. “Yes! Yes, of course!” you nod happily, and Bucky grins up at you as he slides the ring on your finger- it’s a perfect fit. 

You can hear the protests from Bernard and your father behind you, but both you and Bucky choose to ignore them. You don’t care about what either of them have to say, all you care about is the future you’ll finally get to have with Bucky, the man you’ve always loved. Bucky stands up and pulls you in for a searing kiss, your first ever kiss. Sparks shoot from your lips down to your toes, causing them to curl in pleasure. It’s a kiss you’ll remember for a lifetime, one you'll tell your children and grandchildren about. And there was no one you’d rather share it with than one James Buchanan Barnes.

Permeant tags: @crimson-knuckled-queen​ @rexorangecouny​

[megumi-stan]

|Soothe Me | M.F x Reader

A/N: It’s Soft Megumi hours! This was supposed to be a NSFW piece, but it was just so sweet i didn’t want to take the story there and distract from his loving and overall caring energy! 

All characters are aged up in this story! Also, quick reminder that I’m open for requests :) 

Dedication: Thank you so much @timewehad​ for sending such a sweet ask! You definitely motivated me to finish this thing i started a few days ago and completely forgot in my drafts! 

Fighting curses for a living had a price. Besides the constant endangerment of your life.

Sore muscles.

Every time you bent down to tie your shoes, seven different muscles pulled painfully and at least ten vertebrae locked in place, forcing your body into a struggle to straighten itself. If you could walk just looking at the floor without it being weird, you wouldn’t bother to endure the hell that came with a straight spine. If only you had eyes in the top of your head like some of those slimy creatures you fought regularly, your life would be ten times easier.

After one particular busy night, your bed was calling your name. Busy in the sense that little weak curses kept popping around every corner nonstop, like a wicked game of whack-a-mole, only without the hammer. If you had one of those at hand, you surely would feel a lot less stressed. Something about smashing things was an exceptional way to relieve pent-up frustrations.

Walking up to your bed proved to be an arduous task, with your stiff legs and trembling muscles, but slowly you made progress. Your chest felt like it was about to cave in from exhaustion as you were slightly aware of the shower running and Megumi’s soft voice mumbling the lyrics of some cheesy 80’s love song he unexpectedly knew the lyrics of.

The soft comforter brushed your legs when you got to the bedside, and with no grace flopped down face first into it. You tried to kick off your slippers, but failed terribly as they refused to let go of your feet, so giving up you just left your legs dangling off the side.

Megumi’s sweet singing and the storm outside was a perfect recipe for sleeping, and right at that moment sleeping was all you could manage. Lulled, you drifted off into the place between dream and reality, still slightly aware of everything going around you but too busy making up fictional scenarios where you were laying on Megumi’s chest as a soft warm breeze ruffled your hair and the smell of ocean drowned the smell of coffee that lingered in your bedroom.

“What are you doing?” The fog dissipated, and suddenly you were face to face with your boyfriend.

Megumi had gotten out of the shower and was crouching down on the floor. A soft smile curved the tip of his full lips and amusement glinted in his eyes. Your eyes scanned his face and traveled lower, to the sharp curve of his jaw and the smooth skin of his throat. Drops of water still clung to his bare chest and glistened under the warm light of lamp resting on your bedside table. He looked like one of those greek gods you often appreciated in old paintings, all hard muscle but with a peaceful aura surrounding him, looking like he was a minute away from growing wings and taking off into the sunlight.

You hummed in acknowledgment and turned to your side, ten different vertebrae and a shoulder blade popping in the process. You winced, eyes drifting shut at the sharp spike of pain followed by the bliss of relieved pressure off of your nerves.

“Well, that sounded painful...” His fingers brushed a stray strand of hair out of your eyes and they lingered on your cheekbone, tracing idle circles on your skin.  “I’m assuming work was a pain on your ass, huh?” Leaning in, his mouth lingered above your brow for a millisecond before pressing a chaste kiss on your forehead. His breath tickled you and warmth blossomed in your heart.

He got up and walked to the pile of clothes resting stop of a chair in the room’s corner. Your eyes followed his figure and never once blinked as you took in his graceful strides and the patch of pale skin often hidden by his pants, but now on full display because of the towel that hung dangerously low on his hips. He always complain about the word “beautiful” every time you used it next to the “you are”. He would argue non stop, stating you were just trying to boost his ego, but you never once found another word to describe him, and somehow you still felt that Beautiful wasn’t enough.

Not even the other girls gawking at him in the streets and shamelessly flirting while you, obviously his partner, stood next to him seemed to prove your point to Megumi. You couldn’t even be angry at the flirts. He was a sight worth of painting, framing, even adoring. He could be a god disguised as a mere mortal for all you knew, and even that would make more sense. It shouldn’t be possible for someone to be as breathtakingly beautiful as he was.

Even casually standing and just roaming through the pile of clothes, he made your stomach curl with something hot and heavy. The muscles on his arms flexed and his shoulder blades moved underneath his skin, doing very interesting things under the dim lights that had you hypnotized, eyes glued to his back and taking in everything they could, committing every single dip and crevice to memory. You could barely breathe while looking at him.

As if he could have felt your eyes on him like a caress, Megumi looked at you from the corner of his eye, a smirk tilted his mouth and a small barely noticeable dimple appeared on his cheek. Your muscles tensed at the sigh, suddenly too hot and bothered to relax when it was obvious he was evening something. The glint in his forest green irises was a dead giveaway.

Sighing intently while his eyes never once left your form, he loosened his grip on the towel. The white fabric slipped across his legs as it came undone and landed at his feet. Traveling the distance your fingers twitched to travel as well. He was sideways, showing you his profile as he grabbed a pair of loose black sweatpants. His well-defined thighs were teasing you, seemingly mocking you along with the deep V on his hip. His position was so that nothing too inappropriate could peek, and you were never awakened as fast as in that moment.

He slipped the pants on, managing not to flash you in the process and came right by your side, the smell of spice and pine from his deodorant enveloped you in a hug as he, in a sweet action that had your belly feeling funny from the amount of butterflies fluttering around, took off your slippers, his fingers casually brushing the arc of your feet and triggering chills down your arms.

“Thank you...” You muttered, turning to lie on your back. Another joint popped, but you couldn’t feel which one it was. Megumi Chuckled at this and shook his head while circling the bed. He sat down with his back against the headboard, going through his phone. His hip bone was leveled with your head and the temptation to just press your lips against it was poking your brain, but your body refused to move a few inches to do so. You were so exhausted and even tho it was worth it you couldn’t for the love of god lift your head from the mattress.

“Tired?” he questioned, while his fingers made their way to your head and sunk into your hair. With knowledge he had from years of dating and even before that when you two were just friends, Megumi’s fingers stroke your scalp, earning a soft hum of approbation from you. You looked up and found his eyes already on you, phone long forgotten because of the new task he had at hands.

“Yeah, a little…” You said, with your eyes fluttering close to enjoy the attention he was giving you.

Megumi patted your head a few times to catch your attention, and when you looked at him, he extended his arms towards you, asking you to get in between them. “Come here…” He invited, a sigh laced in his words.

You tried to push yourself up from the bed, but your treacherous arms failed you, giving up under your weight and sending you face first into your bed.

“Your helpless… You know?” Megumi chuckled under his breath before one of his arms snaked around your waist, his bicep flexing and pulling you onto his lap. Once he had you where he wanted, with your back pressed against his chest and his hands resting on your midriff, he kissed your cheek. Your eyes drifted shut simply enjoying his presence, letting the even rais and fall of his chest calm your mind. “Can i have a kiss?” he muttered, resting his chin on your shoulder, and peering at you with those forest green eyes that seemed to shine, and when he was so tender towards you, how could you deny?

Your chest soared with his words, so you turned your head to meet his awaiting lips, you could almost feel the softness of his mouth when a sharp searing pain stabbed your spine halting your movements as you squeezed your eyes tight. “Shit,” You cursed, pressing your palm against the ache in the back of your neck, hoping it would do something to soothe it.

“Oh, god… Baby, let me see?” Megumi’s fingers pried yours away and then brushed your hair away. His fingers thumb brushed your skin two times over the spot you were holding, and even though it still hurt, his concern seemed to tone the pain down a little.. “Does this hurts?” He applied a little more pressure and when you didn’t wince he kept going, tracing circles and working to erase the knots and kinks that bothered you. “Lean forwards for me…”

Doing just what Fushiguro instructed, you leaned forwards as he shifted underneath you. Suddenly you were no longer sitting on top of his legs but instead sitting in the mattress while his thighs circled yours, pressing against them and allowing his warmth to seep into your legs through the fabric of your jeans.

His other hand soon joined, and his fingers massaged your shoulders and neck intently. You could still feel the burn and sometimes when he pressed a little to hard on a specially sore spot you would yelp and try to get away from him, but he was fast to apologizes and land a kiss on the side of your neck.

You two spent fifteen minutes in that comfortable silence, until he perked up and and halted his movements

“I know what to do… Hold on a minute.” He shuffled behind you and leaped out of the bed, walking away into the bathroom without any explanation.

You just sat there, waiting, and wondering if he had some kind of lotion or cream to help you. You couldn’t recall ever seeing one in the shelves, but he often bought things and forget about them hours later.

The sound of running water rushed out and drowned the silence. You counted on your head, one minute, two, three… Still no signs of Megumi coming back to bed.

“Megumi?” Your answer came in the form of footsteps. Coming out of the room, he smiled at you as he approached. “What are you doing…?”

“Come here…” He said, not answering your question and scooping you up in his arms. On instinct your legs circled his waist while he supported your weight with his hands underneath your thighs.

“Megumi!” You laughed, surprised, clinging to his shoulders while he walked you two back into the steamed filled bathroom. The scent of flowers was what hit you first, closely followed by the sight of a filled tub with bubbles. “What?… Did you do this?” You asked in wonder, feeling cupid just shot another dozen arrows into your already pierced heart.

“Of course… You’re not feeling well, and a warm bath is a wonderful solution.” Pride shone in his eyes. He lowered you on the edge and took a step back. “Get in, and I’ll be right back.” He moved towards the door but hesitated before exiting the room. “Can you take off your clothes? Because I wouldn’t mind helping you out with that…”

“Oh god…” Embarrassment hit you like a wave and you covered your heated face with your hands. “That won’t be necessary, thank you. “

“Just looking out for my girl.” the dimple appeared again, and you almost wanted to crawl under the water to hide from the embarrassment. Even after all this time, he still earned a reaction from you.

“I’m sure you do.”

His laugh lingered in the air as he exited, and with shaky fingers you unbuttoned your jeans and slipped them off. The muscles on your back pulled as your pulled the hem of your shirt over your head, but you endured it. The sweet call of the warm water had you stripped down and inside the tub in no time.

Bubbles covered your chest as the heat from the water seeped into your body, the water brushed your chin as you just felt all the exhaustion from the day drain out of your body. Your eyes fluttered shut, and you lounged in the water like a tea bag without a care in the world.

“Comfortable?” Looking up, he was next to you once again.

“Very...”

He tapped something on his phone, and a soft guitar strummed. He placed it on the mirror shelf before grabbing the elastic of his pants. Noticing he was actually pulling them down, you turned away, covering your eyes.

“What are you doing!?” You asked, startled.

“Well... You seriously don’t expect me to get in with my pants on, do you?” He said matter-of-factly. And a shiver raced down your arms, while a heated wave pooled at the pit of your stomach.

“Are you getting in? You just showered! ” You stole a glance at him, forcing your gaze to stay on his face.

“Yes, but then you weren’t sitting in the bathroom with this much skin exposed... are you really embarrassed?” Laughing kicked the garment off. “You just watched me change a few minutes ago.”

“Shut up, Megumi.” You whined, fighting the urge to let your eyes roam.

“Come on, scoot over.” He laughed. “ I’m worried your might combust from embarrassment.”

Sighing, you moved forwards on the tub, letting enough space for him to sit behind you. The water rippled around you before you felt his soft skin brushing your bare back. His hands found yours and laced your fingers together.

“Better?”

“Yes, thank you, love...” You whispered, bringing your joined hands to your mouth and kissing his knuckles. Scars from past battles scattered the surface but you could only a testimony of his strength.

“Of course.” He squeezed you against his chest for a few heartbeats before asking. “Do you mid if I wash your hair?”

A heat that had nothing to do with the water temperature and all with the rumble of his words crept from your toes to your neck.

“I think I’d like that.”

Grabbing the bottle of shampoo, he dropped some of it on his palm and then he started robbing your scalp in lazy circles, his nails gently scraping it. You could feel his head swinging to the beat of the song sounding in the bathroom, before his voiced joined in.

Lyrics about love and happiness tumbled out of his mouth with a subtle rasp to them. And suddenly you were back to thinking about your dream, the one with beaches and warmth. Maybe a vacation wouldn’t hurt... You considered bringing it up, but the atmosphere was too serene to disrupt it with questions about his schedule. If you asked, it meant he had to stop singing in order to answer you, and that was the last thing you wanted at the moment.

Surely it was the warm water and his fingers, but sitting there listening to his voice and feeling his breath brushing your face, you concluded that Megumi’s mere presence was all you needed to feel better.

[anntoldst0ries]

Everything else is just the weather

Book: Open Heart Pairing: Dr Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr Noelle Valentine) Word Count: ~5.3k (I sinned!) Summary: Ethan takes Elle out on their “first” date. Category: Fluff Warnings: None

A/N: It has literally taken me ages to finish this fic. To the point that I couldn’t look at it anymore, but here it is. I had it in mind for a really long time and now that OH is back, I feel like I’m ready to show it to the world. As always thank you for your support and I hope you like it!

This fic is part 2 of birthday present for my friend, part 1 is the fan art which you can see here. Once you read the fic, the fan art makes more sense :)

This is my submission for CFWC Silly Love Stories, Day 12: Date night.

Loud knocks resonated throughout the room. 

"Come in!"

"Good morning, Mrs. Peterson.”

“Good morning, Dr Valentine. I think you are the only doctor in this hospital with some sort of manners, everyone else just waltzes in here as if it was a damn barn!”

“Hospital or no hospital, everyone has their right to privacy.”

“Thank you, child. Once again, please call me Faye."

"Alright Faye, but only if you call me Elle.” She smiled sweetly, and the whole room seemed to be suddenly lit by a thousand suns.

“How are you feeling? Are the meds making a difference?"

"They are. I am ready to be discharged today.”

"Not so fast. I am not ready to say goodbye to you yet."

“Why would you possibly like to be lumbered with an old nuisance like me for even a second longer than necessary?”

Elle just laughed and shook her head. The ‘nuisance’, as the elderly lady so lovingly put it, was exactly what she loved about her job. She loved spending time with her patients, she loved their stories and their worldly wisdom. It made her sad to see how many of them thought they didn’t matter or considered themselves and their lives boring. To her, they were anything but. 

Many of Edenbrook’s staff members kept asking themselves: what is it about her? She was a great doctor, no two ways about it, and she was a genuinely nice person. But what was the source of power she had over people? If she woke up one day and decided to start a rebellion, patients would have most certainly followed her, even if it meant they’d be leaving the premises of the hospital with naked butts or trailing their IVs behind them. Doctors, nurses, administration, cleaners and security would follow shortly. She only had to say a word.

And how on Earth was she capable of turning Dr Ramsey, the grizzly bear of Edenbrook, into a benign teddy bear with as little as one look? It was beyond everyone’s apprehension.

Had they spent more time actually observing her, rather than gossiping in the corners, the answer would have unveiled in front of them within minutes.

It was very simple.

Noelle was truly curious about people. She genuinely liked them and was determined to get to know their story, for it helped her diagnose them faster and also satiated the young doctor’s hunger for knowledge.

Patients never felt like “curious cases” or “numbers” in her presence. They were… themselves - people with hopes, dreams, fears, pet peeves and odd habits. They were human. 

So little and yet so much.

Those never touched by serious illnesses often failed to understand that sickness strips you of your dignity and becomes your identity. Your true self becomes covered by this weird, annoying sticker that wouldn’t come off no matter how hard you tried to remove it. 

But this young woman, despite the nature of her profession, somehow managed to notice what was hiding beneath this misleading layer.

Had all these gossipers spoken to her patients, that’s exactly what they would have heard.

"What's happening today?" The older lady asked with a flick of curiosity in her wrinkle-haloed eyes.

"What do you mean, Faye?" The young doctor sounded genuinely baffled by the out-of-the-blue question.

"Well, I am no diagnostician, but I believe I am rather observant and you radiate with happiness. Something special is happening today, am I right?"

"Yeah, you are right." Elle blushed like a teenager caught in a lie. "My boyfriend is taking me on a surprise date today, but he won’t say a word about it, so I'm super excited to find out what he planned for us. He usually isn't one for romantic gestures, so the secrecy is killing me."

"Do you think he's gonna pop the big question?" Faye’s eyes lit up with excitement.

"No, we're not there...yet." Elle faked a smile, but a tone of doubt and sadness coloured her voice. They probably never will be, those things weren’t in the cards for Ethan, as he already stressed once.

But once was enough and she didn’t dare mention the subject again.

"Well, I'm pretty sure he's got some big guns in store, I would if I had a lady like you." - a male patient lying in the bed adjacent to Elle’s patient added smiling flirtatiously. 

"Jerry, you were supposed to focus on getting better, not stealing my girlfriend." They all jumped when a deep baritone echoed throughout the room, hitting present company like a wrecking ball. She must have left the door ajar or Ethan could penetrate the walls soundlessly, because no one heard him coming.

Exactly how long has he been standing there for and how much did he hear?

"Dr. Ramsey, flirting makes your blood flow faster. Isn't it the very definition of life itself?” Jerry’s tone was brisk and lively.

"Well, it definitely isn't the definition of recovery after a heart attack." Ethan used his authoritative doctor’s voice but knew this wasn't a battle he was going to win. Jerry had something he didn't: a couple more decades of life experience under his belt and even the best medical school in the country couldn’t compete with this.  

"Besides, Dr. Ramsey, I don't think that the beautiful Dr. Valentine here fancies old farts like me." 

"That's where you are wrong, Jerry, looks like this is exactly the type I fancy." The two women laughed, however Ethan was far from amused. "Dr. Ramsey is 10 years older than me."

"10 years? What is 10 years in these times? Nothing. When I was getting married 40 years ago, it was something. But today? Look at all them playboys with girls younger than my granddaughter. 10 years is actually a very healthy difference. Men are immature and slower with growing up emotionally. So I'd say you've caught up, Dr. Ramsey, and the two of you are emotional peers now.”

“Thank you for the fascinating lesson in human psychology, Jerry. To think I’ve wasted all this time and money on medical school and no one taught me this.”

“Dr. Ramsey, it’s because schools and useful knowledge are mutually exclusive.”

Elle and Faye were on the verge of bursting out in laughter, but managed to keep their composure and used the non-verbal communication of exchanging glances instead.

Once they made sure their patients had everything they need, Ethan and Elle wished them a good day and promised to stop by in 2 days, as the following day was their day off.

The moment the door closed behind them, Ethan crossed his arms on his chest.

"I lose you from my sight for one second and this happens. 5 more minutes with Jerry and I'd be single again."

"At least no one wants to poke your eyes out for being with me."

"And someone wants to poke yours?"

"Where do I start... nurses, who had a crush on you long before I even set foot in Edenbrook? Female interns? Anyone, who has a pair of functioning eyes and ever looked at you?"

She was adorable when she was doing this, her whole body overtaken by excitement and her hands waving. When she was talking about something really important to her she wasn't just conversing with her mouth, she was doing it with her whole body.

Suddenly, his pager painfully reminded Ethan that this was neither the place nor the time to lose himself in adoration.

"I need to go, I'm completely swamped today and I have my favourite cherry-on-top board meeting. In case I don't see you for the rest of your shift - I’ll pick you up at 7."

He was gone before she was able to form a response. Was it just her or was Dr Ramsey weirdly… nervous?

* * * * * * * *

At 7pm sharp, Ethan Ramsey curled his palm in a fist and gently knocked. The door opened in an instant, as if someone knew he'd been standing there for the past few minutes.

"Ethan! I mean Dr. Ramsey...please come in!" Sienna squeaked with nervous excitement as she let him in.

"Outside of Edenbrook Ethan is just fine, Sienna. If you don't mind me calling you by your first name, of course."

"Mm..mme? No, yes, I mean... Elle is on the balcony." She tried to hide her embarrassment and motioned towards the tall windows surrounding the living room. Some time ago, he would have been oddly proud to have such an intimidating effect on people - nowadays, more than anything, he was amused. Has he really changed so much?

The answer to his question was leaning against the railing, glass of wine in her hand. Gauzy, flowery dress enveloped her frame and tanned skin. 

For Ethan, it was as clear as crystal: summer had the face and scent of Noelle Valentine.

Long before she started leaving her toothbrush in his apartment and sleeping in his old JH t-shirts, Ethan noticed that whenever he laid eyes on her, his whole body started acting in a very irrational way. His doctor’s instincts prompted him to think of all types of biological causes and chemical reactions in the brain. Then, when he sort of admitted to himself it’s not just pure science, Ethan leaned towards the forbidden fruit theory - the more he couldn’t have his drug, the more he was craving it.

But the feeling never disappeared. Whenever he wouldn’t see her for a while - be that an hour, a day, or just when she went to take a shower or make a coffee - the very moment her face came into his view again, he felt his stomach somersaulting.

Every. Single. Time.

It wasn’t any different now.

"Drinking without me?"

She almost dropped the glass when his voice stopped the train of thought in her head. But then she saw his face, the way too seldom relaxed muscles and a barely-there smile.

A perfectly tailored shirt clung to his torso marvellously. If not in medicine, he surely would have made a name for himself in the fashion industry. Fortunately for her, the idea never crossed his mind. 

The warm wind blew in her face, carrying the scent of expensive cologne which overwhelmed her nostrils. She didn’t know this one, so it must have been new. But she did know that smelling it for the whole evening while staring at his handsome face will be a pure torture.

Simply put, she was a goner.

"I don't know why, but I was quite nervous. Had to summon the courage somehow.”

“As you should be. After all, it's not every day that one goes on their first date."

She looked at him as if she’d just been told that a UFO landed on the roof.

“On a what?”

"Well, I was thinking a lot lately about how we never had a first date. Nothing was ever...typical with us. I promised myself I will do my best to fix things that caused you pain or deprived you of the things you deserved. Maybe I cannot fix some immediately, but this one I can, so I will."

Her eyes, overbrimming with affection struck him like thousand lightnings. Thank god a comfortable silence fell between them - had she asked him a question, it would have been clear that right now he is nothing but a simpering moron.

With this in mind, he took his hands from behind his back, holding a small bouquet of pink gerberas.

"These are my favourites." Her face instantly illuminated at the well known sight and smell. "How did you know?”

"I had some amazing helpers."

Elle instantly turned her head left and looked inside, where grinning, Sienna was showing her the thumbs up.

"Wow, now I actually wish I'd downed the whole bottle."

"I'm glad you didn't. I want to go on a date with a woman, not her lifeless body, even though the body itself is very appealing. Shall we?”

“King of compliments…”

* * * * * * * *

"You actually look like you are having a good time, Dr Ramsey.”

"Why wouldn't I? There is alcohol, sitting under the sky definitely has its charm and the company is acceptable." She playfully swatted his arm, the gesture a quick reminder of how comfortable they felt with each other, something he constantly remembered to never take for granted.

“Although I love this, I still don’t understand why you dragged me all the way outside Boston, I’m pretty sure the rooftop bars are pretty acceptable there, too. A bit more crowded though, that’s for sure.”

“Are you complaining about the fact that we have this entire place to ourselves? I know the owner and he was indebted to me.”

“Of course he was.” Looks like the whole town is indebted to Ethan freakin’ Ramsey.

“With regards to why I brought you here… you’ll just have to wait and see.”

Gosh. She couldn’t decide whether the mysterious side of Ethan Ramsey was hot as hell or annoying as hell. But she didn’t really have time to contemplate, because her companion asked her a question.

“Why did you become a doctor?” The ocean eyes pierced her to the core and she had a feeling that even if she was the best actress in the world, there was no way she’d be able to hide something from this man.

“That’s a terrible change of subject. Also, I must have told you like a million times already.”

“No, you never told me.”

When she looked at him and really, really thought about it… she suddenly realised Ethan was right. Elle told the story so many times she sort of… assumed she told Ethan, too. 

“Are you sure you want to hear it today? It’s a pretty sad story, a mood killer I’d say.”

“It’s what makes you you, so yes, I want to hear all about it - the good, the bad and the indifferent.”

“I’ll tell you, but I need to ask something first. Why now? We’ve known each other for a while and you just… I just sort of assumed this isn’t the type of conversation you’d like to hold.”

“You’ve hit the nail on the head.” Ethan’s expression was gentle, not a hint of irony in his voice. “I’ve known you for a while now, but there are still so many things about you that I don’t know. At first, I didn’t want to ask, because asking these questions meant admitting that there is something more between us. What a fail would that be, after I’ve mastered the art of denial.” He laughed, but it wasn’t a bitter or a nervous laugh, it was a genuine banter between them, as the British half of her soul liked to call it. “But you made me want to dig deeper.”

Was it the heat that made her catch her breath, or did it have nothing to do with the temperature?

“Plus, this is sort of what first dates are for, right? I’m sorry for skipping right to the more complex questions. It’s not that I don’t want to know what you were afraid of as a child, I want to know all the details… but it feels like the atmosphere calls for something…bigger.”

So she told him all about her friend, how she fell ill, how she couldn’t be saved and how the experience wreaked havoc on her whole life, tears glistening in her eyes at the mere memory of the events that shaped who she was today.

Ethan listened, his whole body tense and eyes transfixed. She was giving him one of the most fragile parts of her and he had to make sure his hands were there to catch, carry and care for this treasure.

“And that’s when I realised that if I focused on becoming the best doctor I could be, then maybe one day, I’d be that person who has an answer, who can solve a mystery and save a relationship that means the world to someone. Sometimes, people don’t realise that when a person dies, it’s not only them that’s gone. The part of someone who stays, who has to deal with the whole ‘me after you’ - that part is gone, too. So for me, in a way, this meant saving more than one life.”

For a couple of seconds he didn’t move. Then, without saying a single word and with an unreadable expression he got up and offered her a hand, which she silently accepted. He led her to the railing, where the sun was slowly sinking into the boundless waters of Quincy Bay.

His lips found the all too well known way to her forehead, placing a loving kiss on her delicate skin.

“I am so proud of you.” There was something so mesmerising in his whisper, sending a shiver down her spine.

“As a mentor or as a boyfriend?”

“Both. I want you to know that your dedication to people who rely on you is astounding and hardly present in doctors your age. Or any age, for that matter.”

“Wow, Dr Ramsey, smooth. Trying to hit on me with a recycled pick-up line used on a national TV? No wonder you didn’t have too many girlfriends.”

“No, I didn’t. But I believe everyone has a limit of luck they can get per life. And looking at you, I got a couple of lifetimes worth of luck.”

This was enough to render her speechless. She smiled and at this very moment he knew he would do anything to make her smile like this. She wrapped him around her pinky finger and suddenly his whole existence revolved around finding ways of seeing her curve these breathtaking lips as often as possible and making sure he is the reason she smiles… not crying her eyes out.

Although the other didn’t know, because none of them said it out loud, they both thought the same thing.

This feels so right. 

There isn’t a hint of awkwardness in the fact that they can go from being serious or emotionally vulnerable to funny and teasing in seconds.

In one effortless movement, Ethan spun her and pressed her back against his chest.  Then, he started placing a series of tender kisses along her jawline and the crook of her neck, slowly moving towards her shoulder. 

Come on, just say it Ramsey. It doesn’t get any better than this.

He wrapped her palm in his and pointed them towards the sky. 

“There they are - the Little Dipper and the Big Dipper.” Their intertwined fingers were jumping from one tiny flashing point to the other, as if they were playing connect the dots. “And that’s Orion’s Belt.”

“I really don’t get why at this point I’m still surprised that you’re good at everything.”

Elle was drunk on his every word, as this annoying trait of Ethan Ramsey being the know-it-all was actually one of her favourite things about him. 

As for Ethan, he couldn’t help but think that life wasn’t perfect and was never going to be. But this - this moment - it was in fact perfect. Why take chances of ruining it, when so many things can go wrong?

What if she doesn't say it back?

What if she's just gonna laugh at him or tell him he had it all wrong.

What if he misinterpreted everything and she never thought about him this way?

He was terrified of being this exposed. The last person he loved so much left him without batting an eyelid and disappeared for 25 fucking years.

Maybe it was better to live in a perfect illusion than a reality in which there was even a 0.01% chance she doesn't love him back.

So they both drowned in the moment, drifted in the sea of rapture, lost in the illusion that it can all last forever.

It was her who broke the silence.

“I’m getting a bit cold, is it ok if we call it a night?”

“Right, of course.”

“Thank you for the first date, I loved it.”

Handing her his jacket (her favourite, the dark green leather one) Ethan was furious at himself. 

Maybe he was broken. Maybe he will remain broken forever. Maybe that’s the way it must be.

“Do you want to spend the night at mine?” The question slipped his tongue before he was able to fully reflect on it.

“At yours? Unless you have some secret place I don’t know about, just a quick reminder - I live there too.”

“Since this was our first date, I thought it was a gentlemanly thing to ask.”

“In that case… I am afraid I have the ‘after the 3rd date’ sleepover rule, Dr Ramsey.”

* * * * * * * *

The morning came all too soon and the hot, ruthless rays of the rising sun announced that Ethan is now way past his regular wake up and get up time. He barely slept, tossing and turning, replaying every second of the evening in his head.

His hand mindlessly reached for what he hoped to be the familiar curves and softness of the body he adored so much. 

But his palm hit the mattress with a loud thud. The bed was empty. 

The all-too-well known feeling of hopelessness slipped into the doctor's mind with ease. What did he expect? He was acting weird the previous day. First date, what a stupid idea. She must have realised something is wrong with him and finally left.

But before he was able to fully wallow in the mud of pity, the feeling was soon replaced by an old friend Ethan haven’t heard from for a long time.

Panic. 

Where was she? Is she ok? What if something happened to her and he was just sleeping like a log instead of being there to protect her. He couldn’t stand the thought of losing her… again. Something grabbed his chest in a tight grip and wouldn’t let go. 

Scenes flashed before his eyes, vivid and bright. Their hands touching through the glass wall. Her hand cupping his cheek through the layer of hazmat suit.

He got out of bed at the speed of sound and started running around the apartment, but she was nowhere to be seen. 

Suddenly, he noticed.

The balcony door was opened wide. 

Shit.

Heart in his mouth, Ethan crossed the distance between his kitchen island and the balcony door in the blink of an eye. 

Elle was just serving pancakes outside. The goddamn pancakes. The only thing he couldn’t cook. The one thing she kept teasing him about and he rolled his eyes every time she did.

God, he promised himself he will never learn how to make them, if it meant she would just tease him forever.

She was smiling as widely as ever, putting the sun and everything else in the world to shame. Ethan was still a bit shaken and his uneven breathing gave him away. Elle finally noticed his presence.

“Good morning, I was just about to—“

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

They both froze. 

The tension in the silence that had just set in was so thick you could cut it with a knife.

But the silence didn’t last long. As one man, with eyes full of disbelief, they both murmured simultaneously:

“What did you just say?”

This time, he felt obliged to break the silence.

"I...I...I mean, I…" 

Damn it, get it together, idiot.

"I didn't mean to…”

Great, Ramsey, keep digging an even deeper hole for yourself, then crawl in and stay there forever.

"You didn't mean to say it?”

"Yes. No. I mean, damn it, I am making things worse, aren't I?”

She didn’t set him straight.

"The thing is, I wanted to say it yesterday. I had it all planned, I took you for a first date and I wanted to say it for the first time yesterday.”

"Why did it have to be yesterday?”

“Give me a minute.”

She just rolled her eyes, but Ethan didn’t have a chance to notice before disappearing inside. A few moments later he re-emerged, his face and torso covered by a neatly wrapped, rectangle-shaped object.

"What's this?"

"Something you should have unpacked yesterday, but then... life happened."

Elle sat down on cold tiles, her hands trembling with a mix of fear and excitement. And just like he did months ago, he took her hand in his, only this time he cupped his own cheek with her palm and placed the most tender kiss on the inside of her hand.

It was her favourite medicine, a remedy for all things wrong. 

He sat beside her and nodded at the mysterious package. With impatience growing inside of her, Elle has torn the paper up.

Inside was a dark blue, framed print - the colour of it an instant reminder of her favourite set of irises.

She studied everything with intent. A circle must have been representing the earth and the irregular dots and lines must have been the stars and constellations. 

"A map of the sky? That's beautiful, Ethan."

He knew immediately that although her delight was sincere, she had absolutely no clue what she was looking at and why she was looking at it.

“It's not just any map of the sky.” Ethan explained gently, hints of pride colouring his voice. “It's a map of the Boston sky from exactly a year ago. Well, a year and a day.” He smiled faintly, now a shade of sorrow in his enchanting voice.

Silence. Was she supposed to know what that meant?

“Aren’t you full of mysteries today? Ok, you need to throw me a lifebelt here. What's so special about the sky from a year and a day ago?”

“For the world? Probably not too much. For me? Everything.”

At this stage of their relationship, she knew a lot about Ethan’s behaviours, triggers, his body language. And not just a relationship as a couple, but also everything that came before Ethan became someone she was running through life with (the life of two doctors in one of the busiest and most prestigious hospitals was certainly not a walk in the park).

But it still fascinated her how his demeanour changed whenever the subject was serious, whenever he was talking about something that truly mattered to him. It was as if he’d stripped down of all the layers and let her look into his bare soul. These rare moments of vulnerable intimacy meant more to her than any night of passion they ever shared.

Her eyes turned to him in pledge, because as much as she wanted to, Dr Valentine still couldn’t fully comprehend the scene unraveling in front of her.

“Read the description below the map.”

Dear God, did she actually hear shyness in his voice?

She skimmed through the image again, and there it was, right at the bottom. Elle was so focused on trying to decipher the meaning of the image that she didn’t notice the words below. 

The words which explained everything.

I WILL NEVER FORGET THE DAY 

THAT MADE ME REALISE

YOU ARE THE SKY

EVERYTHING ELSE IS JUST THE WEATHER

Her emerald eyes brimmed with hot tears as the meaning dawned upon her. Words were very unnecessary, but now that he summoned the courage to speak, there was still a lot he wanted to put into words. He gently took the frame from her hands and leaned it securely against the wall.

Taking her palms into his, he placed delicate kisses on her knuckles, his lips tracing the shape of these two tiny hands, which held all of him. Everything he had, everything he was and was going to be, he placed in those two fragile palms, with an unspoken hope that they will hold him and catch him if he falls. 

“Look at me.” The words were pulsing with care and affection, even though his voice coloured them in serious and desperate shades.

“One year ago… and a day from today…” He smiled and she felt the warmth spilling inside of her. The power he had over her was beyond the limits of understanding. 

Little did she know that the object of her affection was lost in the same thought.

“I was standing exactly where we stand right now. It was dark and the view wasn’t that spectacular.” He freed one of his hands, but only to make contact with her cheek to caress it slowly. In this moment, he had to touch her any way that he could. With his hands. With his eyes. With his soul.

“But I always found comfort in staring at the sky. When I was at med school, I had countless moments of doubt, I wanted to quit more times than I can count. So I used to go to a secluded place at night and stare at the sky. It made me realise how, in one respect, I am just a grain of sand in the universe and how little my problems are. Funnily enough, this thought actually brought me a sense of comfort. If I am as little as I think I am, then what is the harm in being brave and taking chances? A wise man once said… There are some things that are worth any risk.” 

She giggled through the tears, the sweet sound soothing his shattered nerves.

“I was standing right here and I never felt more miserable in my life. And I couldn’t understand why, for God’s sake. I was thriving at work. I had everything figured out and planned. I was pushing you to be the best you could be and I watched you turn into someone who would one day be far greater than me. But you looked so sad, so… broken. You already know I can’t just gloss over you feeling down. The sadder you were, the more miserable I felt. One evening, I was having a glass of scotch and I remembered some tiny exchange we’ve had earlier in the day, literally a chit chat. No idea what it was about. But I remembered your smile and your laugh. Every tiniest move of your muscles, your eyes, how your hair set around your face. It made me happy. Even if it was just for 5 minutes, knowing that you are happy in that very moment filled my chest with lightness. That’s when I realised I want to be the person who makes you feel this way.”   

She blinked the first time in a while, as if she was afraid to make the tiniest movement, afraid it will all disappear and turn out to be a dream. Giant teardrops rolled down her angelic face, trailing the path of joy.

“Noelle Sky Valentine, I love you. I have loved you for a long time but I was too stubborn to let myself give in. And that, as you already know, will always be one of my biggest regrets.” 

“Ethan, I don’t… I’m so sorry, I just don’t know what to say.” Her voice was saturated with emotions.

“I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t the reaction I was hoping for.“ 

“I love you too, Ethan Jonah Ramsey. You are by far the most complicated and stubborn person I have ever met. You are… everything I never knew I looked for in another human being.”

Once he heard her say it back, he couldn't get enough of it and a lifetime didn't feel like enough to tell her he loves her, as many times as he wished to.

“But I do have to mention this, Dr Ramsey… from the first date to a love confession in less than 24 hours? I’m sorry, I think this is moving too fast.”

“I’ll show you too fast…but I’m afraid we need to get inside, I don’t want the whole world and its wife to see how I teach you a thing or two.”

Ethan scooped her in his arms and carried her inside, despite her mock protests. He smiled and corrected himself. 

He wanted for the whole world to see.

Because the whole world was right there. 

In his arms.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

If you’ve gotten this far, I need you to know you are absolutely amazing 💗

Tag 🏷 list: @jamespotterthefirst @romewritingshop @romereadingshop @genevievemd @starrystarrytrouble @terrm9 @mrs-ramsey @maurine07 @gryffindordaughterofathena @mercury84choices @lovingramsey @qrkowna @openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations @lisha1valecha​ @oldminniemcg​ @iemcpbchoices​ @tsrookie​ @fayeswiftie​ @levinsdowneyy​ @brooks-eden​ @poudredevie​ @queencarb​ @caseyvalentineramsey​ @lucy-268​ @tenaciousdeputydreamfriend​ @alwaysmychoices-sideblog​ @whippedforethanfreakingramsey​ @schnitzelbutterfingers​ @the-pale-goddess​ @lem-20​ @wingedhairstylemusicweasel​ @liaromancewriter​ @ohchoices​ @archxxronrookie​

[aalissy]

Best Friends

Day four of Adrienette April is finished woot woot!! I hope you guys enjoy this lil bit of post-reveal pre-relationship bc it’s one of my fave tropes hehee. Lemme know what you think <3! Also I can’t wait for April 10th now to watch Lies. I missed miraculous sooo much :D :D

AO3

Marinette was stretched out across her chaise. A book was in one of her hands as she skimmed through the pages lazily. Adrien was sprawled on her lap as she distractedly ran her fingers through his hair. Every so often, she would put her book down to take a small peek at the boy who was smiling happily, nuzzling into her hand. She had to bite down on her lower lip to fight against her own grin that was threatening to beam across her face.

They had revealed their identities a few months ago after they had both stumbled into the same alleyway to detransform. To say it had been a surprise was an understatement. Knowing that it had been Adrien flirting with her the whole time was something Marinette couldn’t even process for days. 

Once she had found out, of course, her feelings for him grew exponentially, especially when they began to hang out every chance they got. Knowing that the love of her life was also her best friend filled her with euphoria. Unfortunately for her, though, Adrien’s feelings must have stagnated because their relationship didn’t change. They were still just friends, regardless of how often she wished they could be something more. Marinette let out a quiet, forlorn sigh as she twirled a strand of Adrien’s hair around her finger. Luckily, his voice broke through her melancholic thoughts with a statement that made her heart tug painfully in her chest.

“You know you’re my best friend, right?” Adrien stated plainly, blinking up at her with a pair of beautiful, wide, earnest eyes.

Her fingers paused in their tracks and he made a quiet noise of discontent before nudging her hand with his head. Giggling softly, Marinette resumed their previous dance through his hair, putting her book to the side. Looking down at him with a happy grin, she murmured, “Of course I do, kitty. You’re my best friend too.” “So we can tell each other anything then, right?” He asked her eagerly.

“Mhm,” Marinette hummed back with a small chuckle, “I mean we already know each other’s secret identities so I don’t really see the point in us hiding anything else.”

She ignored the twinge of guilt that ate away at her. She was still keeping something from him. But at this point, she was not ready to ruin the wonderful friendship they had created together. Even if she longed to lean down and connect their lips together and find out if Adrien’s mouth was as soft and sweet as it looked. For a brief moment, Marinette wondered if he would be alright with just a peck before she forcefully shoved those thoughts back into the recesses of her mind.

“Of course,” Adrien nodded before he scrambled out of her lap. He left Marinette with her hand still hovering in the air as a shocked look entered her eyes. Lowering her arm back down, he began to speak again, “So if I ask you something right now, will you answer?”

“Uh, I’ll try my best too.” She gave him a wide, awkward smile, rubbing her arm as she shifted into a more comfortable position.

“Perfect!” Adrien beamed back at her before he seemed to turn slightly shy. Looking at him curiously as his mood completely changed, Marinette watched as he glanced away from her. He rubbed the back of his neck before murmuring, “Do you remember Glaciator?”

A small crease furrowed her brow before she nodded slowly. Nibbling on her lip, she wondered where he was going with this. Of course she remembered Glaciator. Looking back on it, her heart filled with both pain and regret. While she had still been hung up on Adrien missing their date, she had missed the fact that her kitty had been waiting for her. 

If only she had gone to that meeting. Maybe if she had, she would have been able to accept Chat’s rose and feelings and saved them a lot of heartache. Still, it was much too late for that line of thinking. Adrien was over her now and she was okay with that.

“That day you told me you had gotten your heart broken and you were in love with someone else,” Adrien spoke determinedly, making her squirm uncomfortably. 

Why was he bringing up the past like this? Did he know? Was he trying to let her down easily? Anxiously, Marinette bit down on her lip as she waited for him to get to the point.

“W-who was it that broke your heart that day?” His words made her wince, her mind racing as she scrambled for an answer.

I can’t exactly say it was him! Marinette screamed at her mind in frustration. Taking a deep breath, she slowly spoke, “D-does it really matter? He moved on and I’m alright with that.”

Adrien frowned deeply before seemingly murmuring to himself, “So it wasn’t Luka after all then?” 

There was a small pause in the conversation as they both stared at each other with wide eyes. Marinette desperately prayed that he wouldn’t ask the question she could see already forming on his lips.

Almost in an act of defiance, Adrien said the very words that she had desperately hoped he wouldn’t. “Then who?”

Sucking in another deep, tremulous breath of air, Marinette’s eyes darted around the room. Finding no answers, she decided to settle for telling him a small portion of the truth, “Well, I-I may have, um, been slightly disappointed that our friend wasn’t able to join us for ice cream.”

“Why couldn’t your friend come?” Adrien’s frown furrowed even deeper.

Her lips pursed as annoyance filled her briefly. Did he really want her to spell it out for him? How humiliating. With a small gulp, Marinette muttered quietly, not moving her gaze away from her bedroom floor, “I don’t know. His father can be pretty strict so I think he wouldn’t let him out or something.”

“Oh,” Adrien said and she could almost see the look of realization cross his face as he breathed out the same word once again, “Oh.”

With an awkward laugh, Marinette moved to get off the chaise, ready for him to make fun of her, “Y-yeah, anyway I should go do homework now so I gues-”

“Hold on,” he spoke, catching her wrist gently. Finally, she turned to look at him and saw confusion instead of a look of disgust. Adrien hesitated before murmuring quietly, “Me?”

“I-it wasn’t your fault though!” She rushed to explain, “Don’t worry I completely understand why you couldn’t make it!”

“Marinette, that’s not...” he began before shaking his head, standing up to face her. His hand remained on her wrist and her eyes shot down to it before quickly looking back up at him. Adrien squeezed her wrist softly before, “Was I really the one who broke your heart that day?”

Marinette squeaked loudly, squeezing her eyes shut. She shook her head furiously, refusing to answer that question. A pair of soft, warm fingers trailed down her cheek and she leaned into Adrien’s hand with a quiet sigh.

“Please, Marinette,” he murmured into her ear, “Please tell me the truth. This could mean everything.”

Her eyes fluttered open and she was struck by his emerald eyes staring into hers adoringly. For the first time in a while, she could see love and adoration brimming within them. Feeling her heart thump wildly in her chest, Marinette stuttered, “I-it was y-you. A-Adrien, it’s always been you.”

His mouth fell open before his face practically lit up. He let out a loud whoop before picking her up and twirling her around the room. She squeaked once again, her arms wrapping around him before he put her back down. He beamed down at her before whispering, “It’s the same for me, Marinette. It always has. In and out of the suit, I love you.”

“What?!” She practically shrieked, “N-no, that can’t be. You moved on. That’s why you’ve stopped flirting with me.”

Adrien looked at her with a deep frown, “Stopped flirting with you? Marinette, I spend every last second of my free time with you. We just spent an hour cuddling on your chaise. If anyone stopped flirting it was you.”

Marinette bristled, “I did not stop flirting! We may have spent the last hour cuddling but I was the one running my fingers through your hair that whole time!”

She poked a finger in his chest, glaring up at him. Instead of arguing back, Adrien simply grabbed her hand, spreading her fingers across his chest with a small chuckle, “Alright, so neither of us stopped flirting then.”

“T-that’s right!” she stammered, feeling a dark blush settle on her cheeks.

“And if neither of us stopped flirting, then that means both of us still like each other, correct?” Adrien asked with a sly smirk twitching at his lips.

“O-oh, y-yeah, I guess,” Marinette stuttered again, ducking her head away from his gaze towards the floor.

A hand cupped her cheek and tilted her head back up to face him, though, as Adrien smiled softly down at her. His thumb stroked gently across her face as he leaned in slowly, “So can I do this then?”

“Uh-huh,” Marinette nodded dumbly, still feeling dazed and confused. 

Their lips connected and she felt her heart race as she finally realized she was kissing Adrien. It was perfect. Slowly, her hands reached up to bury themselves in his hair as his grip on her waist tightened. She tilted her head to deepen the kiss and for the first time in a while, she felt complete.

Eventually, they both pulled away and Marinette felt a lovestruck smile light up her face as she nuzzled into Adrien’s chest. He chuckled, and her eyes fluttered closed when he murmured quietly in her ear, “Does this mean I can finally say you’re my girlfriend now?”

Marinette tilted her head back to laugh loudly, “Yes, kitty, I’m your girlfriend now.”

Her thumb reached up to caress his cheek before she pulled him down into another kiss. With a happy sigh, she couldn’t help but smile into their kiss. Everything was absolutely perfect.

[ysljoon]

Books, Boba, Bosom Buddies|Kim Namjoon x Reader

Summary: Kim Namjoon is the new hire at the library you work at. After the first clumsy run in you had with him your feelings for him develop over the months and you two painfully pine for each other.

Clumsiness is a trait that can usually be very hard to be considered an endearing trait, but somehow Kim Namjoon can change that. He doesn’t have a careful bone in his large, muscular body (he has such a nice body, how can we ignore that?). You got a first hand experience of his clumsiness on the first day when he was hired at the library. Somehow he decided to fill the circulation cart with more books than it can handle by placing books on top of the already properly placed books. As you turned the corner, both of you guys were unexpecting to each other’s presence. Namjoon was able to not only lose control of the cart to narrowly avoid hitting you, but also managed to dump the books all at your feet. 

After getting over the initial scare of being almost run over by the cart, annoyance came over you. You started to collect all the books that were scattered on the floor and you tried your best not to let your scowl show. You knew he was new, but how can somebody be this reckless with shelving books. Working at a library should be peaceful and Kim Namjoon is uprooting any semblance of peace that should be there. He stooped down and started to help you organize the books while profusely spewing out apologies. You looked up at him and your frown softened when you saw his dimpled cheeks and honeyed skin. Your annoyance disappeared because how can anybody hold any form of negative emotion to someone that looks this alluring? He was eye candy on thick long legs that caught your eye when he squatted down. Once you were done ogling him you got around to accepting his apology.

“It’s okay, just try to not hit any of our patrons because they will not be nearly as helpful or as nice as I was in this situation.” You gave him a cheeky grin and made your way to the audio section to find a DVD that a customer placed an order for pickup. Little did you know that the effect Namjoon had on you was the same case for Namjoon. The smile you gave him left him flustered in his spot, almost in a daze. He knew he was going to think of your smile for the rest of his shift and he didn’t need any distractions if he wanted to keep his job. 

//////

A couple months later you and Namjoon have become bosom buddies. You could call him for anything and he could do the same. You guys had created a friendship that blossomed into mutual pining that neither of you were aware of. The not so subtle flirting (it was painfully obvious to your coworkers, but of course the both of you were undeniably blind to each other’s advances) had ramped up as the weeks went on, but you still questioned if it could go any further. Jin, your other coworker at the library, was just as tired as you were from the blind romaticisizing. He always pushed you to ask Namjoon out, but you always disagreed by saying things like Namjoon was never interested in you and just thought of you as his best friend and nothing else. Jin always showed you evidence on how that wasn’t the case, but you were too in denial that someone as attractive as Kim Namjoon would want to be more than just friends.

As your shift came to a close and you were done doing your last walk around to make sure everything was in order, Namjoon was there waiting for you at the front with flushed cheeks. He was rocking back and forth on the sides of your feet and you wanted to just pinch his cheeks at how cute he looked at this very moment. You turned off the lights and walked out with Namjoon by your side. The library closes at 7 pm, but Namjoon still insists on walking you to your car even though there is still enough sun out to not pose any threat to your safety. The chilvarous action makes your heart flutter regardless. Tonight he seemed to linger around a little longer before saying goodbye. You gave him a hug and as you stepped off the curb he gently grabbed your shoulder. You turned to face him and he was avoiding eye contact while anxiously scratching the back of his neck.

“Y/N, there's a new boba shop that opened on the corner by my house. Would you like to go?” You now understood why he was acting so nervous and your heart was doing somersaults in your chest while Namjoon’s was probably beating like a hummingbird’s wings. 

“Like a date?” The words tumbled out of your mouth and you felt like an idiot. Of course this wasn’t a date, he just is your best and that’s all you’ll ever be to him.”

“Y-yeah it can be a date. Or not if you don’t want it to be!” Oh. You weren’t expecting that at all. You gave him a coy nod and opened the passenger side door for him to get in. The car ride was filled with tension that you’ve never experienced before. This is what you’ve been longing for and now that the time was here you didn’t know how to react. Namjoon put the directions into the GPS on his phone and you made your way to the boba shop. The drive couldn’t have been longer than 5 minutes, but it felt agonizingly slow from the awkward atmosphere.

Once you got to the store, Namjoon held the door open for you and the cashier gave the both of you a warm greeting. You decided on getting taro milk tea and Namjoon decided to get a hibiscus lemonade with fruity flavored popping boba. As you waited for your drink you made small chat with each other and started to make yourself more comfortable with each other. It’s crazy that you guys go from being best friends that could tell each other anything to acting like awkward high school freshmen that have no idea how to deal with feelings.

You and Namjoon enjoyed your drinks outside to bask in the warm summer air while watching the last of the sunset. Namjoon was going on about his love for nature and it made you feel so endeared that someone could feel so passionate about the beauty of earth. You couldn’t help yourself and cut him off mid sentence with a kiss. The boldness surprised not only him but you too. You pulled away and instantly regretted your decision when you saw his wide eyes.

“Namjoon, I’m so sorry I don’t know what came over me. If it’s weird we can totally forget this even happened and move on-” Namjoon gave you a warm smile and pecked your cheek with a gentle kiss. “I literally spent nights thinking about you kissing me. That was everything I dreamed of and more Y/N. I want us to be more and I’ve always wanted to be more.” Hearing his confession made you grin and you felt all your emotions come to the forefront, including your insecurities.

“I’m glad Namjoon, I want us to be more too, but before we go there. I just want you to know that I haven’t dated anyone since my freshman year of college so I’m probably a little rusty in the romance department.” You tried to brush off your embarrassment with a chuckle, but it didn’t make you feel any better. Namjoon took your hands in his for comfort and scooted closer to you where your knees were touching. “Y/N my first kiss was in my sophomore year and college and that was the last bit of romance I’ve ever experienced. We can teach and learn from each other since that’s what love is all about.” Namjoon wrapped you up in his long arms and everything felt right and you were content that the pining between you two was finally done. The days you spent daydreaming about him has become reality.

Notes: It is 2 am and I wanted to write this grossly self indulgent drabble. This is unedted and I’m so tired so please excuse any typos or grammatical errors I was inspired by me getting boba for three days straight. As always I appreciate any likes and reblogs. If you would like to support me further you donate to my Kofi

[wisteria-lodge]

snake primary (lion model?) + snake secondary (rapid fire bird model)

I am pretty sure I am a snake/snake sorting, with my primary (burned snake) as a rock solid certainty. I am not doing so well on figuring out how models work, and if I have them. It makes me doubt my secondary sometimes. Let me give you a few examples:

Last autumn, I was making a lot of soup from scratch. I started with recipes, but pretty soon I was just throwing things together.

Definitely sounds like an improvisational secondary.

(I'm a Badger secondary, and my baker friends make fun of me, because I treat recipes like spells I follow them so exactly. I only recently learned that the reason you put put in salt in water is to make it boil faster. I'd been doing it, but I might as well have been putting it in there to banish the bad spirits.)

But I always made sure I had some kind of home-made broth to hand, and some kind of soup magic stuff (heavy cream, milk, cream cheese, etc.)

This could be rapid-fire bird (or a rapid-fire bird model.) You feel comfortable improvising, but only because you already know a lot about soup.

I only went back to recipes when I wanted something new or specific. Then I went and posted a kind of improv instruction for soup making (take some meat, any meat, sear it and and pair with some veggies, any veggies, etc.).

So far, I'm agreeing with you. Improvisational secondary, maybe some kind of bird model to give extra structure and support.

I train new colleagues. When I start with a new group, I like to have all the prep-work done so I can concentrate on the social aspects and not get bogged down finding the right worksheets, or shit like that. I plan my first few words, and if there is no better opening, I use them and go from there. I have a general structure of what I want to teach them, what methods to use and in what order. It is adapted from experience, and the more rigid guidelines we are given by our client. I am constantly tweaking it when I'm not training. If I feel my group needs something different, I will abandon the plan, let them guide me on a detour, and bring them back when it feels right. Somehow, it still works out 95% of the time, especially now that I have found my confidence and know it works^^

This sounds exactly like how I teach. And for me, what is going on is the bird model prepwork making me comfortable enough to just vanish into my Courtier Badger. I've only recently been learning that I can... relax on the prep, a little. That sometimes too much prep gets me in my head, and sabotages me a little. Like I can just trust myself in the moment, and things work out just fine.

I have found the shc system a week ago, and I have been obsessed ever since. I got curious because a friend mentioned it. They were really into it, and I like sorting people if the system makes sense. I dug in, got hooked, and finally found words to describe everything I had figured out so painfully about myself in the last few years. Especially my snake primary was such a surprise and relief, let me tell you.

It's a good system. And it's... uniquely able to talk about certain kinds of things.

I am thinking there is at least some sort of bird model here, giving my improv some structure?

Took the words out of my mouth.

I was flirting with rapid fire bird as a secondary, but now I have put it into words, not a chance. I like my (contained) chaos too much^^

So far, I don't have too much to add. It's all very well laid out, and well understood. I do like the dramatic structure that happens when someone writes in convinced their a Lion and I start going into why they're actually a Snake but hey. This is nice. This is mellow.

Let's talk about badger secondary model instead. Just to get the elephant out of the room: I hate hard work, it feels slow, dull, and like there should be a better method somewhere. But I know that sometimes, you just have to do it if you want to build a reputation, or you know you need to rely on the goodwill of your community in the future.

This is so like... Rapid-fire bird processing Badger. Just the grudging respect of SURE badger secondary can be a useful tool I GUESS.

I feel awkward keeping shallow contact with my colleagues, I forget if they have kids, and I have been experimenting with discreetly taking notes on what they value.

This is so Bird.

It's not very successful because I can never remember them when it's necessary, so I nod and figure it out by asking "knowing seeming" questions, anyway.

This is so Snake.

What does resonate with me is the part of "becoming what they need" making myself into the tool I need, making myself seem reliable by being relatable. I mostly start a one-on-one conversation by mirroring the other person's mood.

Courtier Badger and Snake secondary can look very, very similar - especially from the outside. This right here could be a description of either.

It is only recently, and only with people I know well, that I have found the seductive power of railroading them instead. I can now cut short a friends whining by summarising what they're saying in a blunt and charming manner, and make them smile instead. Not always, but now I know it works, I use it more and more often.

... but this could only be Snake. Doing this sort of thing consciously and on purpose is so huge and so key. Courtier Badgers do have to believe it, and so they have a way of vanishing that Snake secondaries don't.

And I think I am exaggerating my "go and figure shc out, and be loud and open about it on tumblr" part, because it's what feels right at the moment, but also because the friend who got me into it is a burned lion secondary. They like me charging in, taking it for myself, and they admire anyone who can be honest and vulnerable in public.

Very Double Snake. Using a specific approach, specifically for your friend. Also you say your primary is burned... but I'm not getting burned primary from you. But you're also not really writing about your primary, so.

I guess I am making myself appealing, not just relatable like before.

What a perfect way of describing the difference between Snake and Badger secondaries.

Huh. Fading badger performance as snake gets confident? With another badger performance for work that I do grudgingly.

Performance is right. Just a shallow thing you wear over the top, that barely seems there anymore. You work like Bird, not a Badger.

Now lion. Well, lion is... difficult and easy at the same time? I have to take charge, be the boss, and make split-second, straightforward right-and-wrong decisions when I am leading my group: Call out anyone who doesn't play by the rules (though I usually don't care much if it is not annoying). Decide on, and hand out, the appropriate punishment for someone being late, again. Deal with brewing conflict in a head-on manner. But that is something I am still learning, and I am not very good at it.

Some of this is primary stuff - WHAT you do "be the boss, hand out punishments" versus HOW you do it. It's sounds to me like you're building a Lion primary model over your Snake primary, which is normal. Snakes with safe people almost always model something else. (And I already know you've got a friend that's a Lion primary... Snakes do like to match their People.)

It's possible that you're also building a Lion secondary model, or that one of your Snake secondary masks looks a little like a typical lion secondary, but my take is that most of this is coming from a primary model.

I tend to let conflicts slide, trusting they will work it out among themselves.

I feel that this speaks to the water-like nature of the Snake secondary, and a desire to always go around the problem.

or at least be professional about it and not bring it into the training. Definitely a lion performance here, and one I get frustrated with fast because I am not very good at it.

I have my lion moments, like I described with my way of being open and vulnerable about shc here on tumblr. But I wouldn't do it if it didn't feel right, or more specifically like something I need to heal and get better. I know I need to be vulnerable to heal, and it's relatively safe here, in the anonymity of my internet persona.

Hmm. Interesting. I'm not getting Lion from you... if this is a healing exercise, maybe you're practicing existing in your Neutral state?

I have to write it all out, and some of it just happen to come out as advice for other people's asks. It would be nice if I get some recognition for it in the community, and I love the fact that my friends reads it and tells me they like it.

My take on that sort of thing is going to be annoyingly Badger, so I apologize in advance. For me it's all about consistency. Lay a foundation and then build, one brick at a time.

Now that I have written it all out, I think it's probably the most snake way of arguing myself out of any secondary model I could come up with^^ I guess I don't have one, or if I do, I am dismantling it because I need things to be simple for a while. I am tempted to post this on my own blog, but I know it will get a bigger audience with you.

Yeah, no Lion secondary here.

and maybe help someone in a similar situation. So I will be patient, and I thank you for inviting us all to use you as a sounding board for our own shc issues. I have to stop going through your likes, I'm ruining my obsessive fangirl/shc vibes tumblr with beautiful rl-things and creative human interactions^^

I do what I can. I hope I help. :)

Thankyou, @sevilemar for the submission.