#also literally no one was asking for a 1:1 remake

[lawchan89]

“Well yeah, of course it’s not going to be as good as the original show!”

Then why?

Why does this thing exist?

Why does it need to exist in the first place?

This “defense” is not the flex you think it is

If you can’t remake it better

Why remake it at all?

[theyluvlyss]

𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 "𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐬" 𝐟𝐢𝐜/𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐲𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐜 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞...

no offense, but it's the same five songs (a.k.a. same plots/reader types) over and over again. like guys - WHERE'S THE CREATIVITY ?! THE FANTASY ?! THE IMAGINATION ?!

like hellooo, there's literally vampires, magic/hoodoo, and a million themes both hidden and not-so-hidden to work with. not to say i'm not loving what i'm seeing right now, don't get it twisted - I am, and y'all are good,,, but I just think we can do more and better😌🙏🏽.

hence why, I present...

a list of some wip's I got goin' for the future, along with my takes on why/how I came up with them😻 !!

but before I begin...

fair warning #1 - you're welcome to be inspired, but plz don't steal, i'm putting so much effort into these, my notes app hasn't been closed not once😭🙏🏽.

fair warning #2 - ikik, most of these are remmick, plz don't come for me✋🏽🥲✋🏽. I was trying to get them all out of my head before I forgot them, I love working with vampire characters, and finally, yes ofc I will be conjuring up some more for bo chow, plenty for stack and smoke, and some for sammie :). I am a multifandom account, after all, I be working on helllllaaaa other things and trying not to forget them all, so cut some slack <3.

fair warning #3 - I mentioned this in my last post, but all of my readers are black/black-coded. obnoxiously so. because, and stay mad about it, but this is for the niggas, strictly for the niggas, like I don't give a FUCK, okay? y'all can request whatever y'all want (within reason, because if I see something weird in my inbox, you're blockt), but when it comes down to prompts like these - where they're made up by me, original thoughts, not asked for, this is my blog and I can post what I want type shit - it always gave black!reader, like it's the norm over here, I shouldn't even have to say it lol.

anyways, onto my wip's /ᐠ^˕^マ !!...

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

okayokayokay, I know what I said earlier - "iT's tHe sAmE fIvE sOnGs🙉!!" - but listen... I have yet to see a vamp!reader fic where the reader being turned doesn't happen at the end, and it's vague, and doesn't explore that narrative further.

also, it's always intentional, which I get, yk, but I wanna switch it up, give y'all a taste of it being a complete accident and then further delve into the feelings, effects, experience of reader being turned. ofc, with remmick being there for assistance and emotional support in a rather "morbid-amused-lowkey unwanted by the reader, but they don't got much of a choice rn" sorta way lmfao.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

shoutout to the niggas workin' with brail rn, who's personal documents say "legally blind", who's prescription glasses are THICKKK asf...

I see you😌✊🏽.

was that outta pocket?

my fault, anyways...

my thought process behind this was very adhd, so before you attack me, hear me out lol.

vampires are so cool because one of their abilities is having their senses heightened to an almost unnatural degree - I want a reader who has that same ability, but I don't want them to be a vampire, just super skilled with their senses - how would a reader who's not a vampire have heightened senses? idk,,, what type of humans have heightened senses? - ...blind ppl (💀) have heightened senses cuz they can't see, so they have to rely on the other five to get by (because I believe in sixth senses lol)... crazy connetion, but it's true💀 - LOL imagine remmick and reader going sense for sense fr tho.

mr. I-live-for-the-hunt meets ms. i'm-not-the-one.

shit becomes a "don't breathe" remake rq (without the freaky-deaky stuff towards the end, unless y'all are into that, idk💀✋🏽-).

idk, I see a vibe here, it's getting written fs.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

I think it'd just be really funny to write about bo putting up with this silly, dramatic, type of reader. maybe a charlotte "lottie" la bouff type. spoiled but not rotten, definitely a character fr, and he entertains it because he loves it (won't admit it) and reader (admits and shows it).

reader is all pretty and pink and expressive and all her own, and honestly ?? she doesn't really have to go to visit his shop every single day, but she does because this little girl type crush just won't settle (won't admit it, but definitely shows it).

plus, HELLO, black wealth and excellence, idc if it's not fully accurate for the time, it's called fanfiction for a reason. get with it or get lost, let the girlies be drowned in privilege and in bo chow's love, attention, and care😻✨️🩷.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

vampires exist in this world.

you really think i'm not gonna entertain the possibility of other mythical creatures existing as well?

BOOOO LAME‼️

furthermore,,, you really think i'm not bold enough to apply that possibility to some sinners fanfic? did I not JUST talk about creativity??

oh, you not fuckin' with it???

BOOOOO LAAAAMMMEEE TOMATO TOMATO, I'M THROWING TOMATOES‼️🍊‼️🍊‼️.

anyways, I have nothing to explain this/myself more with other than this little sliver of dialogue, for fear of spoiling the fic idea I have in mind/am working on...

. . .

"Oh, honey..." You trailed, barely strangling back a laugh bubbling deep from within your chest, your voice lined with a sense of pity.

Knowingness.

Hardly any question when you asked, "...D'you really think you were the only monster lurkin' through these woods...?"

. . .

THAT'S IT, that's enough, that's all you're getting, teehee🤭🫵🏽.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

i'm a slut for whimsy (and size kinks), what can I say🤷🏽‍♀️?

also, I think I should HEAVILY lean into the "mischievous" aspects of how pixies/fairies are said to be - LOL just some lil' sparkly-winged, elf-eared, three-apples-tall ass creature/reader wreaking havoc on the kkk and others who do wrong, dirty, and evil, reader doing her best to uplift those who don't have her wings, who can't just fly away from the struggles happening all around, reader providing some fun and magic into little boy's and girl's lives, and-

oh, what's this?

reader spotting remmick absolutely devouring some poor soul who crossed his path and, well, they can't help but be interested and curious. maybe even mess with him a little bit.

cue remmick having to put up with reader's mystical magical nonsense, hating every second, but heaven forbid if something happens to the reader😌🥴✋🏽...

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

(my picture limit ruined my aesthetic, y'all😔💔)

remmick x jaded!reader

lmfao ik that sounds wild, but lemme cook✋🏽🥴✋🏽...

reader who - doesn't not care - but it takes a lot to actually phase them/gain a physical reaction. and I mean a LOT.

also, like, they're a freak!! god forbid reader sees something they like, like🙀🙄... (throw back another shot after every like).

idk how i'm gonna pull this off, but I just think it'd be amusingly jarring for remmick to come across a reader who has no fears about his ass being a vampire, nor gives any fucks about his threats on turning them. they've seen and been under much worse circumstances...

"ain't no need for that, the last thing I wanna do is be stuck on this earth for another day😒✋🏽..."

"...I...wha-...y-"

"-if you play nice, though, i'll clean ya' up. you gettin' blood all over my laundry and I don't have time to redo the load."

cue unlikely friendship😻?

remmick is the semi-unruly puppy, and reader is the reluctant owner type beat, because you already know he's coming back, no way he's not😹.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

remmick x fiftiesera!reader

i'm feeling nice, so i'll go ahead and leak the title i'm gonna use😌...

. . .

" 𝐒𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧' 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐀 𝐒𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐈𝐧 𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐜𝐡 "

. . .

to sum up what i've got in the oven...

religious themes/god complex/kink(?) - vampire turning ofc😌 - smut (have I mentioned that some of these prompts do include smut?? well, they do lmao) - do you have issues with your parents? reallllyy don't like them?? this fic will potentially heal some of that for you idk lol - the second out of two of my readers who are gonna be a little... naive... but it's fine, most of my readers so far have been pretty, "i'm not with that bullshit" types. we need ✨️balance✨️.

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

remmick x heavyflow!reader

I won't lie, I saw a tumblr post on here that fully inspired what I have in mind...

so thanks to them, everybody thank this user lol. all I plan on doing is fleshing out this prompt into a full blown imagine, like deadass.

remmick at your door every time he can smell the start of your cycle...

yes bruh, I used my last pic for a meme, god forbid I put humor over visual pleasure, like🙄✋🏽...

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

remmick x 2025era!/modern!reader

no idea what i'm gonna do with this, ngl, I just figured that if i'ma do a reader from the 50's, y'all would start screaming at me to do a modern reader, so🥴💀.

i'll take ideas/requests, tho :D !!

───────── 《 .°•♡•°. 》 ──────────

that's a wrap (for now) !!

again, i'm very aware (and not proud) of the fact it's mostly remmick, but like I said, there's plans for sammie, smoke, stack, and bo, so don't get on my case, I just need time to keep brainstorming before I explode lmfao💀😭.

anyways, stay tuned y'all, because these fics are all currently in the works and I will be honest, the more ppl confirm they're rocking with these prompts and looking forward to them, the more likely/confident i'll be with actually getting them done and done well :).

byeeee, i'll be back in another millenia😻‼️✨️.

[sworeidnevercompromise]

ꨄ︎ pillow talk: a drew starkey smau part one > series masterlist

divider creds: @adornedwithlight

filmupdates

liked by lucaguadagninoarchive and others filmupdates It was announced a few months ago that Y/N Y/L/N and Drew Starkey are set to star in the upcoming "Pillow Talk" remake directed by Luca Guadagnino. The trio will be discussing the film at the 81st annual Venice Film festival this Wednesday.

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y/nweloveyou agh yay my girl's going to venice!

youruser 💚 ・ ♥️ by author

drewstarkeyfan !!!!! venice venice venice!

y/narchive Currently leaping for joy right now!

reputation1389 umm...who was asking for a remake of this movie & also why the hell would they cast y/n to play jan lmfao

officialmikeymadison_ !!!!

madelyncline yes yes yes

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youruser

liked by y/narchive and others youruser venice! ti amo moltissimo! 💚

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bestfrienduser venice film festival TOMORROW how are you feeling queen

youruser @/bestfrienduser so so excited

lucaguadagninoarchive 💚💚💚 ・♥️ by author

allabouty/n ohh ur gonna serve w ur red carpet look i just know it

taliaryder bellissima

alexademie need to see you soon

youruser yes let's grab a slice 🍕

drewstarkey press tour t minus 1 week ・♥️ by author

alexanderludwig Can't wait!

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ynarchive

liked by allabouty/n and others y/narchive y/n has arrived at the venice film festival!

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allabouty/n GOD she looks good wtf! ・ ♥️ by author

timotheechalametpapsmear y/n y/l/n it seems I’ve grown quite fond of you tho there are no sexual urges or desires you come to me as a long lost friend whom I once picked apples with in papa’s orchard

quietquitting @/timotheechalametpapsmear "no sexual urges or desires" is insane bc she's literally the most gorgeous woman alive. i simply cannot relate to ur statement timotheechalametpapsmear @/quietquitting i'm crying LMFAOOO

sallythecinephile yeah she ate ・♥️ by author

samanthasnarkington it's giving cunty tissue paper

allabouty/n @/samanthasnarkington 💀

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drewstarkeypics

liked by drewstarkeyfan and others drewstarkeypics Drew has arrived at the 81st annual Venice Film Festival!

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drewstarkeyfan the outfits & the posing r kinda killing me lowkey it's giving 🧍‍♂️

supercargo @/drewstarkeyfan the way y/n was serving looks & poses on the red carpet and drews lowkey just standing there is so funny. go girl give us nothing

reputation1389 he looks so gorgeous now all i have to do is get y/n away from him

supercargo @/reputation1389 oh that's not... samanthasnarkington @/reputation1389 shut the fuck up

drewstarkeyfan he's blowing a kiss to me in the last slide btw

rafeyswife33 @/drewstarkeyfan hey girl i hate to tell you this but he's actually my man drewstarkeyfan @/rafeyswife33 i will fight you to the death.

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allabouty/n

liked by reina115 and others allabouty/n pics of y/n during her press interview for luca guadagnino's pillow talk.

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reputation1389 this look is BORING!

y/nssangels wow this hair really suits her she's so cute

drewy/nthinker Y/N I LOVE YOU!

lovely232 她有一张人们过去常常为之去打仗的脸。・♥️ by author

y/nitalia ciao bella

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drewstarkeypics

liked by drewstarkeynation and others drewstarkeypics ✨NEW✨ Drew at the Venice Film Festival, discussing Pillow Talk

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drewstarkeynation His eyes are the same shade of blue as the background 😍

supercargo i'm salivating

jmeade123 smash next question

reputation1389 slide 2 is him when he sees people shipping him with y/n

y/nssangels @/reputation1389 i am in your walls.

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youruser

liked by drewstarkey and others youruser sick of teaser trailers, i know. pillow talk's full trailer releases tomorrow. movie comes out in just 2 months. i have never loved a project more. luca - adapting such a classic film can be challenging, but you knocked it out of the park. drew, sweet drew, i couldn't have asked for a better costar. & to my fans: i hope you all love this movie as much as i do. see you @ the movies november 7th. 💚

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drewstarkey november can't come soon enough

youruser @/drewstarkey counting down every second

caring1spunk slide 6. smash. ・♥️ by author

a24 💚

y/nweloveyou will you be posting for every press tour stop?

youruser @/y/nweloveyou most likely! brace yourselves for spam LMFAO

drewy/nthinker "drew, sweet drew" is insane just kiss already ・ ♥️ by author

samanthasnarkington @/drewy/nthinker OMFG SHE LIKED THIS IS CRAZY drewy/nthinker @/samanthasnarkington i literally almost passed out guys is drew x y/n coming true ?!?!?!?!?!?!

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drewstarkey

liked by youruser and others drewstarkey director's cut

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alexanderludwig Excited to be on this press tour with you, man!

drewstarkey @/alexanderludwig can't wait brother youruser @/alexanderludwig @/drewstarkey 🎶 2 heads 2gether can b better than 1 🎶

madelyncline proud of u bud ・ ♥️ by author

dstarkeynews I’m so proud of you, never stop. ❤️

a24 !!!!

obx they grow up so fast 😥 ・♥️ by author

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y/nupdates

liked by explqin and others y/nupdates Y/N serving gelato at a shop in Venice

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singkirbysing So so happy that my song Kool Aid has been put over a video of this gorgeous girl @/youruser. Can't wait to see the new movie! ・♥️ by author

youruser @/singkirbysing i love you wtf!!!

youruser slinging gelato is kind of my calling ngl ・ ♥️ by author

youruser tbh had no idea this video was being taken. why'd i serve so hard ・♥️ by author

y/nweloveyou she looks good in every single frame she's so photogenic i feel physically ill

y/nssangels this is right near my house i'm scared

left4rat i would pay one million dollars to have y/n hand me gelato

drewstarkeyfan all that gelato and she's still somehow the sweetest thing in there

fairylights2222 mother served (literally)

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y/nweloveyou

liked by y/narchive and others y/nweloveyou day 1 of the pillow talk press tour complete!

y/nitalia

liked by y/narchive and others y/nitalia Y/N servizio per gelati a Venezia. È così bella, questo vestito e il trucco le stanno così bene. 😌 (Y/N serving gelato in Venice. She is so beautiful, this dress and makeup look so good on her. 😌)

bestfrienduser

liked by youruser and others bestfrienduser @/youruser press tour brought her to me in greece

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youruser see you again soon beautiful ♥️ by author

youruser why r u literally radiant

bestfrienduser @/youruser all you gorgeous youruser @/bestfrienduser stop i'm going to kiss you

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youruser 10m

drewstarkey 10m

[lunarriviera]

How do i watch dmbj/the lost tomb? In order...they are so many....are they remakes...i know zhu yilong was in one...? I see different actors every time....Pls help if you watched it.

oh ho ho have i watched it. i have watched it alright. not only have i watched it but just yesterday i made my UNDERGRADS watch it (okay just one clip of xiao yuliang, bc i was teaching them about wirework) (bc i also made them watch house of flying daggers, yes it was my favorite day in film class: wuxia day!). NB however that surprisingly little of this is actually wirework—it's just xiao yuliang flipping himself around like a little pancake, bc that's what he DOES.

[yes this guy is huang junjie, not xiao yuliang; but they both play the same character, xiaoge. yes we all know it makes no sense. shhhhh just roll with it, don’t fight it, it’ll be easier if you just accept that your favorite characters will never ever be played by the same actors, except for all the times when they are. why? because of c-ent. go home, c-ent, you’re drunk. also because it’s funnier this way.]

FORTUNATELY you don’t need me to explain bc smarter people than i have already made beautiful guides to watching dmbj. the main thing to remember is that you literally can’t do it wrong bc the entire franchise is, as we say in the american south, a dog’s breakfast. everything is made up and the points don’t matter. you can start with any of the dramas and it still won’t make sense, but that’s okay because that’s what fandom wikis and tumblr and all of us are for.

it’s all because of this guy, 南派三叔 = nanpai sanshu = npss, whose real name is 徐磊, Xu Lei. he never finishes anything he starts unless they force him to, probably by threatening to take away his alcohol. so if you read any of the novels, please don’t expect them to have endings, because half the time they just sort of. stop. (i’m still upset about sha hai. i will always be upset about sha hai. i'm in THERAPY about sha hai.) (and i suppose you could in theory read the novels, in order, first, before watching the dramas? i know exactly one (1) person who did this but they have an exquisitely nerdy doctorate and i really don’t advise it for the faint of heart, you’re gonna suffer through a lot of fart jokes and really super gross insects. sadly i know this because i too have read the novels, because i also have a doctorate and apparently way too much fucking time on my hands. which is why it’s 1 am and i’m answering another ask instead of grading the last half dozen papers on antigone and the popol vuh, okay where were we.) RIGHT, so—definitely read @foxofninetales’s wonderful guide to “possible entry points to dmbj” (or @laireshi’s guide to the novels, if those still interest you.) @laireshi also has an excellent guide to starting with ultimate note, which i think is a fine drama to start with! the cast is great. (just be prepared for a cliffhanger) (which can be resolved, anomalously, by reading the novel). @thelaithlyworm also has a good guide here, and @dramas-vs-novels has a guide to all the major characters. and you will love all of the characters, very quickly, with a degree of intensity that can and probably should alarm you. you will especially love the iron triangle. these idiots. them. yes.

so you can try to be logical about it!…OR you can do what i did, which was, knowing absolutely fucking nothing, just faceplant into reboot (because ofc i was obsessed with zhu yilong, who was my gateway drug, just like 99% of western dmbj rookies who fell in love with guardian), and then stare in horror as dmbj devoured my brain over the next two years and i couldn’t think about anything or anyone but xiaoge. you know. like that. isn’t fandom great.

just think, someday soon you’ll even be able to appreciate this absolutely idiotic in-joke. there are about a squillion more where this one came from, too.

but the main thing is, nonny: whatever you do, have fun! lost tomb is completely unhinged and that’s the best thing about it. it is also, as i repeatedly warn my students, the star wars of china, and you will never ever reach the end of its vast expanses. not least because npss keeps starting and not finishing things.

(but none of them are really…remakes…exactly? they're all mostly maddeningly different and cover different parts of the story, with a few…bizarre, difficult-to-describe…overlaps, and a few parts which don't fit anywhere, e.g. misty creed/conjuring curse.…you'll see.)

[i-love-zelda-16]

LU UPDATED LU UPDATED LU UPDATED

PART 1 (tumblr will only let me put max 10 images on on post 😭)

welcome to my first yapping session!! :D

ALRIGHT LET’S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!! 🎉🎉🎉

so to begin, we first see Sky and Twilight talking about loftwings together!!

so basically that means that Sky was talking to Twilight abt loftwings! so that’s pretty cool ig :D

then Twilight points out that the room got brighter… I believe that this is a “2D” dungeon if you know what I mean, probably taking place somewhere in the downfall timeline. i’m not super familiar with downfall dungeons, so if anyone knows what this means, then please let me know! i doubt JoJo would just put this in for no reason soooo

now we have clarification WHY Twilight asked about loftwings; it was because he was wondering if he’s been to Skyloft, because the dungeon City in the Sky in TP is also in the sky. (btw, I HATED that dungeon puzzle-wise in TP. the design and story was great, but it was confusing and not straightforward.)

also “‘cause, wonderin’, floatin’” yeah i think we can all agree that Twilight speaks with a southern accent :D

also Twilight’s facial expression here reminds me of this specific panel from the TP manga —>

very cute :D

AUUGHHH THE OOCCA ARE LITERAL NIGHTMARE FUEL

also Sky’s shrug is pretty cute lol… and ALL of his facial expressions are hilarious!!

Twilight’s description of an Oocca is pretty accurate ngl

but this leads me to another question: ARE the loftwings and oocca related? well, obviously they are quite different size-wise, with loftwings being much, MUCH bigger. loftwings also come in many colors, but one of those colors is the grey-cream color of the oocca. according to natural selection, it’s possible that the grey colors of the loftwings were kept simply because the grey coloring helped them survive better, therefore passing those traits onto the next generation. they’re bodies are quite similar looking (except for the head, but it’s possible that it just evolved to fit a larger brain) with a cucco-like appearance that was more obscure in loftwings. so overall, I think it’s POSSIBLE they are related, but I do believe that it’s unlikely.

“maybe we ought to worry about you…” HAHAHHA SKY’S EYES BROOO

i think here, Sky is deflecting the comparison of his loftwings to Twi’s oocca. (yes, Sky, buddy, you are the fasted rider in ur class :D)

“… it was just a thought…”

then Twilight mentions Shad… bla bla bla scholar lol

something interesting i noticed here was that the walls in the last longer panel where the two chat about Shad looks awfully like a downfall 2D dungeon, like one from ALTTP. the way JoJo has warped the walls looks VERRRYY suspiciously similar to those, and I think it’s on purpose. cool detail!!

so i found the closest matches to the monsters Sky and Twi fight.

first, is a blue moblin from TAoL (zelda ii, the adventure of link) now this one isn’t a perfect match I don’t think, but it’s the closest one i could find to what JoJo has drawn. it wields a spear and it’s armor is slightly different, but it looks close enough. it also has a distinct dog-like appearance like the one in LU, rather than the more pig like appearance moblins usually have. it’s possible that it’s a blue moblin also from LA NS with a slight redesign, and I do think it’s a probable option… but I will say the TAoL design is closer. but both are from 2D games in the downfall timeline!!

the next one, a Darknut from Link’s Awakening Remake for NS is literally a PERFECT match! it’s sword, shield, designs on its armor, they’re all perfect!! this is interesting because LA technically never existed because Koholint wasn’t real and only in Legend and the Wind Fish’s minds. so… hmmm interestinggg…. but i really doubt they’re in Koholint or another dream because of their surroundings prior to entering the dungeon.

perfect parry from Skyward Sword! JoJo even included the little wind marks that come off your shield when you raise in the SS!!!

this is part 1! go to part two here —> https://www.tumblr.com/i-love-zelda-16/780346968359731200/part-2-of-lu-updated-lu-updated

[thepunkranger]

Resident Evil Characters - A Summary

Note: This is entirely my own opinion and said with a heavy dose of humor

Please enjoy

Chris Redfield

OG

Started as a twunk

Became an angry gorilla man???

Alpha Male™️

Punches boulders

Wants you to marry his sister

Smoker

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife

Rude to wait staff

2/10 - Just a guy. Hit him with your car

-

Jill Valentine

Other OG

Arguably better main of RE1

Master of Unlocking

Bisexual Bob™️

Butch

Supercop

Once got mind-controlled into going blonde

Rocket Launcher babe

PTSD

Big Strap Energy

Giant anime gun

10/10

-

Albert Wesker

OG Baddy

Sunglasses

Thinks he’s cool

A little too into Chris

“What are we going to do this game, Albert?”

“What we do every game, Alex: try to take over the world”

Matrix jacket

Maybe a vampire?

Looks like my uncle (derogatory)

4/10

-

Barry Burton

Bear

A+ line delivery

Just happy to be a part of things

Wishes his daughter would talk to him

Comes through in a pinch

Got lost on his way to The Last of Us

Father figure

Not dead out of sheer dumb luck

8/10

-

Rebecca Chambers

Baby butch

Sees the best in everyone

Autism be damned, my girl can work a shotgun

Sporty

Mommy Domme/Babygirl switch vibes

Sweet coffee addict

Doing fine, thanks for asking

Awkward thumbs up

9/10

-

Billy Coen

Bad Boy™️

Never bothered to take off his handcuffs

Tattoos

Mullet???

Moral standards

Strong silent type

Whole situation could’ve been avoided by just talking about his issues but no

Queen fan

7/10

-

Leon S. Kennedy

If a golden retriever became a human and then got kicked every day of its life

Having a really bad first day

Into dominant women

Dumb 90s haircut

Uses comedy as a coping mechanism

Hair grows in direct correlation to his level of angst

“Hey demons, it’s me, ya boi”

Sexy

Dog lover

Certified Good Boy™️

Fucked up a perfectly good rookie is what you did. Look at it, it’s got depression

15/10

-

Claire Redfield

College student stuck in the zombie apocalypse

Soft butch

Humanitarian

Forced her brother to teach her how to knife fight

Really into motorcycles

Leather jacket

Rocket Launcher babe #2

Always has at least one adopted child with her

10/10 would ask to babysit

-

Ada Wong

Mommy. Sorry. Mommy- sorry. Mommy-

Grappling hook

Badass spy

Emotionally distant

Soft spot for cute cuddly things (Leon)

Femme fatale

Book lover

Chaotic neutral

Crossbow 😍

Could step on me and I’d say thank you

Rocket launcher babe #3

10/10

-

Sherry Birkin

Goosebumps protagonist

Worst parents ever tbh

Surprisingly good under pressure

Please someone get this girl some therapy

Supergirl

Smartest person here

One hell of a shot

The trauma is immeasurable

Somehow still doing fine

Loves her weird adopted family

8/10

-

Carlos Oliviera

Himbo

First POC main?

Went from three polygons and a white boy haircut in the original to actual gorgeous South American hunk in the remake

Lost his accent along the way for some reason

#1 Jill simp

If Dug from Up was a guy

Only trustworthy person in the whole series

Just wants to help

Gorgeous gorgeous hair

Loves strong women

Hakuna matata

Touch-starved

10/10 would peg

-

Steve Burnside

Twink

Who is this sassy lost child?

Hot Topic employee

Into Claire (she’s too old for you bud)

Choker

Thinks he’s edgy

Whiny

Daddy issues

1/10

-

Luis Serra Navaro

If Puss in Boots was a human

The Most Extra™️

Luscious flowing locks

Definitely into bondage

Used to work for Umbrella

Trying to make up for it

Don Quixote references

Bisexual

Good with his hands

Praying for a threesome with Leon and Ada

10/10

-

Ashley Graham

Basic white girl

Always getting kidnapped

Master of Unlocking #2

Razor flip phone

Ada Wong bisexual awakening (same)

Good with a wrecking ball

Makes Leon catch her every time she has to jump a ledge (also same)

Would like to go to Hot Topic, please

7/10

-

Sheva Alomar

Player 2

Second POC main

Bad AI

Too good for her game

Willing to go on a suicide mission with a guy she just met

Left handed

Deserves a better stylist

Only good part of RE5

Literally my girl got done so dirty just give her another chance please

10/5

-

Moira Burton

“It’s not a phase, dad!”

Probably gay

Weak arms

Skillz

Box dyed her hair at least once

Simple Plan playing in the background

Childhood trauma

7/10

-

Piers Nivans

Trying his best

Appreciates a good steak

Sick of Chris’ bullshit

Good with a rifle

Just a good man

German Shepherd boy

Self-sacrificing

8/10

-

Jake Muller

Wesker’s son

Daddy issues

Who invited Ronan Lynch here?

Quips for days

Bad boy

Loves the type of woman who can kick his ass

The Most Edgy™️

9/10

-

Ethan Winters

Husband of the year

Trusting

Surprisingly chill

The most basic white man in all of RE

Hands? What hands?

Functionally a lizard

Would still love you if you were a worm

Just casually knows how to craft bullets

Moldy

8/10

-

Mia Winters

Toxic girlfriend energy

Literally possessed

Dark sense of humor

Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss

Casually working for a bioterrorism organization

Does actually care about her family

Definitely doesn’t have a penicillin allergy

If you can’t be the girl of his dreams, you can at least be the feral swamp witch of his nightmares

2/10

-

Zoe Baker

Lesbian

Mold intolerance

Southern accent thicker than grandma’s gravy

Picked last on the playground

Somehow okay despite her brother being Like That

Joe’s favorite

Science skills

8/10

-

Lucas Baker

Jigsaw

Didn’t even need the mold

Probably got at least one true crime documentary made about him

Working for Mia’s bioterrorism organization

Left his classmate rotting in the attic

Just the worst

0/10

-

Alcina Dimetrescu

Mommy

Please step on me

Elizabeth Bathory vibes

Just fucking huge

Can turn into a dragon

Lesbian

9/10

-

Karl Heisenberg

Grimy

Tumblr Sexyman

When robotics majors get weird

Fights with his siblings

Doesn’t actually care at all about Miranda

In cahoots with the lycans

7/10

-

Rosemary Winters

Mommy and Daddy issues

YA protagonist

Badass

Childhood trauma

Into the Mold-verse

Alternate universe Sherry Birkin

8/10

[see-arcane]

Seeing the Nosferatu and Creature of The Black Lagoon remake summaries reminds me that heterosexual Monster movie summaries are like "The intense and tragic and erotic encounter between a Lagoon creature/vampire/demon/victorian zombie and a woman he is infatuated with." When will the monster be the woman.

Seriously. So fucking seriously. The most I can think of off the top of my head are one-off bogeywomen who never brush the mainstream.

First off, monster women. Not sexy waifu vampire girl with baby fangs meets Average Everyman and they do kissing about it. Real monster women. Who are decayed, or ugly, or inhuman, or outright horrifying. Even just a visibly cadaverous revenant babe ala Warm Bodies' R or Lisa Frankenstein's Creature. Where are they? Where the hell are the actually monstrous monster women?

I know The Ritual has Moder the Jotunn and her badass giant chimera god utterly non-human look. She does some killing, as one does. But we only actually learn she was female from outside sources, not in the film itself. When Moder is referred to as 'a god' the assumption is male, rather than just calling her 'a goddess.' Feels like a cheat.

There's Jenifer from Masters of Horror, based off the comic from Creepy by Bruce Jones and Bernie Wrightson. Her whole deal is being 1) Unavoidably uncannily grotesque and 2) Capable of some depraved shit via simple violence or using her psychic ability to orchestrate some very very unpleasant intimate interludes (and tragic demises).

I know the V/H/S movies have gotten a good handful in, some Medusas and body horror babes, but always in the form of those brief one-shot anthology bits. There and gone. They had an exception with Lilith (the type who starts as Pretty Girl and transforms into Something Else) who appears in the first movie with "Amateur Night" and got her own standalone movie with Siren, which I thought was a really well done sexual/amorous horror story--one in which the woman is the unambiguous predatory monster seeking and assaulting a man as her human crush-target. ...And is also barely known to the horror community.

There's the nightmare shit that happened to the protagonist of Bite. The full movie is here. Do not--Do NOT--watch if you have any phobias to do with insects, disease, reproduction or slow transformative body horror. This is the daughter of Cronenberg's The Fly and The Metamorphosis' pure misery. Good god.

And...that's it. That is the full roster of visibly monstrous females on film I have in my memory.

Second thing: Romance. Human Guy and Monster Lady.

Literally the only thing that comes to mind is 1) Corpse Bride with the Most Hourglassed and Beestung Pout Lipped Cadaver You Have Ever Seen and 2) Spring (2014). The latter I haven't seen yet, but the premise is very clearly Legit Monster Babe and Smitten Lover. Kudos.

Everything else I've come across is just Hot Chick has Fangs and the guy is a guy. No genderswapped Beauty and the Beast. No scaly hulking Ladycreature of the Lagoon pining for a young man taking a swim. No eldritch/demonic horror-woman forming a relationship with a male admirer who has heart eyes despite (or because of) her power and monstrosity.

There is no equivalent of Nosferatu with a female villain being gruesome yet intoxicating to her young man victim.

There is no equivalent of Lisa Frankenstein or otherwise romantic fairy tale between a scary bogeywoman and a handsome--dare we dream, pretty--gentleman.

It simply does not happen in the mainstream and rarely if ever in the niche indie efforts.

And I'd ask why, but like. We know why.

Who wants to see a frightening woman as the powerful villain?

Who wants to see a frightening woman as a romantic partner?

Who wants to see a frightening woman?

[percyluvr]

Heyhey :D can i request a percy jackson x daughter of demter!reader headcanons? Plss 💗

percy jackson x daughter of demeter!reader summary: hcs about percy w a daughter of demeter

his first thought when he saw u was 'she is so cute i need her in my life IMMEDIATELY'

when he went to ask you out, he bought one of those flower language books so that he could get you flowers that were meaningful and romantic

u literally almost cried when he gave u the bouquet bc it was the most romantic thing u had ever received in ur entire life

HE EVEN PUT UR FAVORITE FLOWERS IN IT GOODBYE

he's such a sweetie and he always listen when u talk

he loves it if u have a softer voice

he just loves u fr

but anyways

he always follows u around when u go around camp making sure all the plants are healthy

and he asks so many questions

hes genuinely so interested

he gives you carefully picked out bouquets of flowers and he keeps some flowers so when they die he knows when to get you a new bouquet

hes ur #1 fan

he thinks its so cool how u can manipulate plants n shit

and make them grow

he just finds it really cute how u care so much about the planet too

sometimes yall just sit in silence and do a lil gardening

u show him what u love and he shows u what he loves

HE LOVES taking you underwater

and if u can like do shit with the seaweed he thinks its awesome

like one time u changed the seaweed to be changed like a heart and he almost cried because it was so cute

u made him a flower crown to match the one u like wearing

and he literally died

he could NOT stop telling people about it

he wore it everywhere

and u replaced it every time he lost it... which was a lot more times than he would've preferred

he felt bad

but u didnt really mind remaking it so!

yall just be connecting w nature n shit

frolicking in the strawberry patch type beat

he just thinks ur so cute

ur like a little flower to him

BUT that doesnt mean that he doesnt think ur powerful

bc lord knows u ARE

one time he made you mad and u almost strangled him with a vine

he knew to never piss you off again

yall r honestly chill tho

like the two of you just chill around camp with each other

the shit that goes on at camp doesnt phase you at all

adding onto that, i think yall have just been through so much together that u have a strong ass connection that nobody could break

when yall go on quests together, it always goes smoothly

you keep him in check

but u also let him have his fun

in conclusion, yall were just made for each other

[chaifootsteps]

A summary from someone who was at the premiere:

Hi! I'm the person who was at the premiere and noted how Viv ignored her fans (yes the theater was small looking back on it, this was my first time going to an event like this)

Here are the summaries of the first 3 episodes

Episode 1 The episode starts with an origin story about how the angels created the world and Lucifer was one of them and was very creative and shit. So when the angels made Adam and Lilith (and before you ask yes Hazbin's Adam is the first man, they confirmed it in the episode) and Lilith rebelled she and Lucifer became chums and ended up convicing Eve to eat the fruit, which brought sin into the world and made the angels banish Lucifer and Lilith to hell which made Lucifer sad and lose his spark because he's now surrounded by shitty humans. Lilith meanwhile continued to inspire demons with her singing and because heaven didn't like that they sent the exterminators to make sure demons do not rise up against them. But now it is up to Lucifer's and Lilith's daughter to help sinners.

Then it turns out that this was a book Charlie was reading and Vaggie comes in and comforts her telling her she believes in her. Also it turns out that Charlie has not seen Lilith in 7 years. Vaggie then tells Charlie that Alastor has a surprise and we get to see the ad Alastor made. Turns out that they forced Alastor to make an ad with video (and yes he was upset about it). Big woop the ad sucks cause Alastor insulted people in it. Angel Dust suggests to remake the ad into a fucking porno because of course he does.

Then Charlie gets a call from Lucifer who tells her that Adam wants to meet with her and she sings Happy Day in Hell during her walk to Heaven's HQ thing. Meanwhile Vaggie decides to redo the ad which involves Husk reading off the script and Angel sexually harassing him. Vaggie gets upset and Alastor sees this and promises to make a deal wirh her, he helps her make the ad with a video camera and in return they never make him do shit with video again.

Charlie reaches the Heaven's HQ where she meets Adam who literally talks like Chaz. He swears all the time, talks about sex, and even called himself "the original dick" or something , I dunno I had a stroke. He just spends like an hour or so talking to Charlie about how cool he is, how he had sex with this one chick, ect ect. He's really no different from the average demon. Also he's a hologram and he eats ribs during this. Charlie than finally gets to explain her plan to Adam but he and Lute go "no" because sinners had their chance as humans and Adam likes killing them. He then sings a song which I forgot the lyrics for, and yes the "this shot is EVERYTHING" clip came from that song, and he kicks out Charlie. Oh and the next extermination will be 6 months later because Adam felt like being a dick.

Charlie comes back home all sad and shit and Vaggie tries to cheer her up by showing her the new ad. Until it interrupts and Katie Killjoy announces the news that the next extermination will be in 6 months instead of 12. And yes her voice is literally just Bryce Tankthrust's. The episode ends with Lute showing Adam an image of a decapitated exterminator, and now they want to kill all demons because of the murder of an exterminator.

And that's episode 1

Episode 2 Episode 2 starts out with Charlie realising sinners are freaking the fuck out, and that this 6 month deadline may mean sinners may get desperate to redeem themselves. Also Valentino is constantly DMing Angel because Angel moved out. Then Sir Pentious shows up to fight Alastor again but Alastor kicks his ass.

We then meet the 3 VVVs, and Valentino disemboweled Velvette's model because he's angy Angel moved out, so she calls Vox to calm him down. Vox shows up and calms down Valentino. And bruh, Valentino somehow acts no different from Stella. He's so unthreatening and goofy with how much he acts like a spoiled child who got mad his lolipop got taken away it fucking hurts! During their chat, Valentino mentions to Vox that Angel is not the only patron at the Hazbin Hotel, but Alastor is as well which angers Vox because he thought Alastor was gone when he vanished 7 years ago.... wait-

Alastor defeats Sir Pent by punting him after he rips off a strip from Alastor's jacket. Alastor leaves to get his suit fixed up but not before summoning some monsters to guard the hotel, with whom Angel flirts with because of fucking course he does. Then we get a duet between Alastor and Vox where Alastor basically announces he's back baybee. The three VVVs then try to inflitrate the hotel so Vox they have to hire someone Charlie would not expect as a spy.

Charlie returns with no new patrons until Sir Pent knocks on the door. Vaggie is about to murk him when Charlie decides to give him a chance and welcomes him into the hotel. There she tries to teach Sir Pent how to be good by making him learn about apologizing, so he apologizes to Alastor for ripping his jacket and gives him back the strip he tore off. Alastor responds by burning the strip.

Charlie then does an excersize with the crew where they all introduce themselves, and only Charlie and Sir Pent do it. At some point we get the Roleplaying scene where Sir Pent pretends he is an innocent kid, and Charlie tells him he'll be on his way to redemption in no time, which makes Angel sad for some reason. Angel goes to his room where he scrolls through voice mails Valentino sent him which flip flop between "Angel baybee I'm so sorry" to "Pick up you fucking whore". And the last one is him telling Angel that "there is no hope for you" while red smoke wraps around sad Angel.

Later that night Angel gets up to get a drink of booze when he walks in on Sir Pent putting up a camera from Vox. He confronts Sir Pent and they start fighting. Charlie and Vaggie walk in and Angel reveals what Sir Pent did. At that moment Vox calls Sir Pent and tells him he's a failure who should die because he failed. Sir Pent then bows down to Angel and Vaggie saying he's sorry and they can kill him. They're about to do so when Charlie breaks out into a song how redemption starts with a sorry. They all then go back to bed when Alastor t poses into the room and bullies Vox for a bit before breaking the watch Sir Pent used to have to talk to Vox.

||Also Niffty simped for Sir Pent for a bit because he's a "bad boy", but after he and Charlie sang that song she got upset that he wasn't a bad boy anymore||

And that's ep 2

Episode 3 So episode 3 starts out with it being one week since Sir Pent joined and Vaggie is chewing him out for building weapons and havine egg minions. So she has Alastor take the egg men away. (We also get a scene of Alastor eating a deer carcass for breakfast) Sir Pent also keeps trying to shoot ppl because he doesn't trust anyone.

In response to this Charlie tries to do some trust exercises for the rest of the crew, such as having them say the most intimate things about themselves while also falling down and letting the crew catch them. She tells them how much she loves them and Vaggie catches her. Angel sexually harasses Husk by saying he loves sucking popsicles and then falling in his arms and saying he loves sucking dick too. Sir Pent says he loved his minions and tells ppl not to catch them but they all do anyways. Niffty confesses that she loves killing mama bug infront of their babies so they learn fear. No one catches her but she keeps jumping off the stage over and over. Then Angel suggests another exercise.

Cut back to Alastor and the egg fellows who meet up with Zestial (who also has one of the hottest voices in the show like holy fuck, then again he's voiced by Ozzie's VA). Also people seem to be so scared of Zestial they either run away or the hurt themselves. Alastor and Zestial talk about how Alastor went missing for 7 years and is now working with the princess of hell or sumthin. They end up in a meeting for overlords where Rosie shows up but she says nothing. Also despite Alastor telling the egg sapiens to stay outside one of them ends up following him. Here we meet Carmilla who gathered the overlords to talk about protecting sinners from the extermiation or something. Then Velvette shows up because Vox and Val didn't wanna show up, and she reveals to the overlords a dismembered exorsist head. Then we get a song where Velvette and Carmilla duet and the song kinda slapped? I forgot most of the conversation tho. Then after the song Carmilla tells the Overlords to leave, and Alastor makes the egg man that followed him spy on Carmilla, and it turns out that she's the one that killed the exorsist but I forgot why she keeps it a secret. Also Carmilla and Zestial seem to be a thing. Then she gets a song that's also a duet with Vaggie which I also forgot what it's about.

Speaking of, Angel takes the crew to a BDSM club because of fucking course its a sex joke. Vaggie says no and then takes the crew to a turf war and makes them all fight against other sinners to make them learn how to trust one another??? It some how ends up working btw. Later on after the afromentioned duet Vaggie apologizes to Charlie but she says it's ok since Angel, Sir Pent, Husk, and Niffty seem to be chummy now now that they helped one another in that turf fight. Alastor returns with the eggs and Vaggie allows Sir Pent to have them back. The episode ends with Sir Pent and his eggs going to bed.

And that is the end of my Hazbin screening.

[ducktracy]

thoughts on Daffy in Wackyland? and the original, for that matter

Daffy in Wackyland thoughts: IIIIIIIIII LLLLOOOOOVVVEEEDDDD ITTTTTTT!!!!! i was gonna drop my Letterboxd review for it here, but Letterboxd evidently wiped the short and re-uploaded it and my review is lost?? lame! but i have some observations from when i watched it for the first time that i'll relay here:

I KNOW THESE ARE KINDA DIFFICULT TO GATHER FROM OOC SCREENSHOTS so the jist is: I LOVE THIS CARTOON. it has a profound, personal significance to me not unlike The Great Piggy Bank Robbery or Daffy Doodles. i'm a fervent lover of stop motion and puppetry, i'm shedding my humbleness and reticence to declare myself Daffy's #1 fan and am more prepared to protect my title (aka: i like the duck), Porky in Wackyland is a short i revere a lot--more on that soon--and i'm very stricken by the decision to do this short in stop motion, considering Bob Clampett's background in puppetry. perfect way to homage him. there are some pitfalls that this short runs into that i allude to above, such as the typical LTC Achilles heel of too much dialogue, but i think it's able to work contextually with Daffy here, as i also mentioned above

the visuals are the main focal point for me, and MY GOD THEY DELIVERED SO MUCH. i'm also realizing i never did get around to drawing fanart for this... soon!!! but the color and vibrance and multi-media!! it's so unspeakably inspiring. i especially love how freeform it feels, it really stands out as its own independent style and i love that. feels very fitting for Daffy, who's a character born out of breaking the mold.

the moment i watched the short i was SO UPSET that i couldn't reach out and touch the Daffy puppet. someone described him as a well loved puppet and it almost made me cry. and then, back in April when my friend was giving me a tour of the WB studio, they had some puppets on display!! i was SO SHOCKED because she had sent me pics of it, but i assumed it was a temporary display--needless to say i ran up to this thing to get pictures from all angles LOL

I REALLY LOVE THIS SHORT. so much more than i can accurately give away right now, and i'm very bummed at my Letterboxd review having gotten wiped because that would be perfect to default back on in showing just how ferociously i love this cartoon. like the Porky and Daffy movie, it's one of those things that quite literally feels catered to Me, Eliza Duck Twacy, specifically, and i am not just saying that to be funny LOL. thank you for the reminder that i need to give this a rewatch! i actually think i have the whole short saved to my phone because i was so desperate to have it on hand

Porky in Wackyland thoughts: LOVE THIS CARTOON! so there was a very brief period in October 2019 where my interest in LT waned and i thought it'd just be a passing fixation--stuff like Chowder and Wander Over Yonder were catching my attention, i was moving on... and then i watched Porky in Wackyland for the first time and. well, i'm answering your ask, ain't i?

this review is a few years old, but you can read my more in-depth analysis and write-up of it here! but it's another cartoon i feel very deeply connected to. it's so unabashedly Clampettian, and as a Bob Clampett fanatic that's of course very important to me. it's filled with so many of his cartoonistic self indulgences that evidently Leon Schlesinger dubbed the cartoon "Bobby's wet dream", which is hilarious--but i adore the newspaper cartooning influence in the character designs and cartooning, the unabashed whimsy of it all, the hot jazz soundtrack. it's very cutting edge for its time and is a short i feel is a bit too easy to take for granted today. it's extremely charming, to the point that all of the attempts to remake it, sans Daffy in Wackyland, really flounder. i'm not a fan of Dough for the Dodo (though the ending is amusingly cynical, as per tradition for Friz Freleng) and i can proudly say that Tin Pan Alley Cats is one of Bob Clampett's worst cartoons, even removed of the racism element which is impossible, and so i'll let you wonder for yourself as to what that means. Daffy in Wackyland succeeds because it's its own thing and understood that it was futile to try and "remake" it more faithfully. this is because the original is something only Clampett could have done, because it is so personally his and attuned to his sensibilities.

the exception to this is this lovely comic blurb from Stephen DeStefano... god i wish he drew the LT characters more because the instances in which he has are some of my favorites ever

this layout also makes me feel some sort of way. i really love this cartoon

[taffybee]

not that anyone's asking BUT my hot take on giovanni is he should be retired rn. not from like a "the pokemon company should stop talking about him" (weeeeelll that's sort of part of it but. hear me out) kind of way BUT in a. he should LITERALLY not be doing team rocket shit in ANY canon universe anymore. and it would be TOTALLY in-character of him to do so if the medias still using him characterized him the way he should be. welcome to my ted talk let me explain myself

FULL DISCLOSURE: i like giovanni. like, a not normal amount i fear. all of that opening sounds like i don't but i totally feel stupid emotions about this guy. anyways:

GEN 1. gen 1 games are like... NOT known for their compelling dialogue. and in cases like archie and maxie in gen 3 getting remakes in gen 6, their characterization and dialogue gets (kind of subjectively but i feel this is a popular opinion anyways) Much Better. i think that goes for a Lot of stuff where they give old guys new dialogue in spin offs (gestures at masters ex which i think is Great for making characters Actually Interesting)

but i feel like with giovanni there's been a DOWNGRADE in character since his appearance because he no longer Progresses.

i WILL say masters ex does Some Work to try and make him Deeper than just "I'm Evil for the sake of Being Evil grahgghh 😈" but it's like. overshadowed by All The Other Stuff.

plus he IS rainbow rocket giovanni in masters and i'm like OBSESSEDDD with team rainbow rocket. but i also don't think it should. Exist. I'M GLAD IT DOES but i find it out of character for giovanni to do At All. I CAN EXPLAIN I PROMISE.

team rocket's goals as an organization are and always have been: make money via stealing or otherwise exploiting pokémon. that's all it NEEDED to be. because it was gen 1 and no one needed to be ripping apart the universe yet.

giovanni himself sees pokemon as a means to an end. that much has stayed consistent in all of his appearances. but what CHANGES things in what happens when he LOSES for the FINAL TIME in r/b/y:

I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE TO THE STUDY OF POKEMON. that's like CRAZY sort of redemption. and you Could argue against me to say "well have you considered he was lying" and i Have but i think it's SO much cooler if he was being legit. if he was so Changed by losing So Many Times to a little boy who just cared So Much for his pokémon that he needed to experience that for himself.

I mentioned in my previous giovanni post that pokémon origins has characterized giovanni "right" and THAT'S because via continuously fighting red and seeing his passion for battling as well as his love of pokémon firsthand, giovanni rediscovers his lost passion for pokémon that he had when HE was younger, and he sees HIMSELF in who red is and decides to disband team rocket after their gym battle so he can turn his life around. i HIGHLY recommend watching episode 3 of origins if you haven't seen it. it's freaking Marvelous.

ANYWAYS. THIS is the characterization of giovanni i support the MOST because it's not terribly complicated but still has nice depth to his character that you could read into.

BUT if we're going by this characterization of him, he should. NOT BE DOING TEAM ROCKET STUFF NOW! he SHOULD have been retired storywise by game freak after that and retired job-wise. studying pokémon and touching grass.

but THEN. gen 2 happens. (... well, gen 2 and the first gens 1/2 remakes.)

gen 2 introduces the concept of "let's bring giovanni back". which i wouldn't complain about if giovanni wasn't ALSO trying to get back. WHY. WE ESTABLISHED IN THE FIRST GAME HE'S DONE. and gen 2 didn't DIRECTLY SAY giovanni was up to come back (as far as i'm aware, i did NOT play gsc, someone correct me if i'm wrong). but when frlg released, they Changed dialogue from the original to FIT this idea:

NOW "studying pokemon" has become "training". there IS no character development for him here, he JUST wants to get stronger to be a Better mob boss. and this is supported by the celebi time travel event where he's ABOUT to rejoin team rocket before you beat him

the big problem with this (and any giovanni dialogue in the time travel event) for me is that it frames everything that happened to him in gen 1 as "giovanni wasn't a good enough mob boss then but now that he's had some time to Train he's ready to be a Better Mob Boss" WRONG! THAT WAS NEVER THE ISSUE!! part of the pros of team rocket at its peak was that giovanni was Unknown to most and could direct operations in the shadows AND he could keep his business as a gym leader because NO ONE KNEW. but now EVERYONE knows and team rocket can LITERALLY NEVER REACH THAT PEAK AGAIN. the ONLY CORRECT thing to do in this situation is Disband and Do Other Shit (cough cough study pokémon and touch grass cough cough)

this seems obvious to me that this desire to keep dragging him back into things is the games way of being like "woaahh!! callback time!!" and then later down the line "woaaahh!! nostalgia time!!!" (because they wouldn't have retconned that final gen 1 dialogue if it wasn't) and while i can Appreciate it to a degree (because i am Not Immune to getting STUPID EXCITED when old blorbos show up) i think continuing to make giovanni show up to Be Evil isn't the way to go about it. or at LEAST not canon timeline giovanni.

and the gen 1/2 remakes for ME is like... the beginning of the issue, but as we've gotten Further Away from gen 1 in time, the more i feel they stray from where he ended in the original in favor of making him More Blandly Evil. he feels constrained to one-liners about how the worlds an EVIL PLACE and he's just playing the game or whatever alpha sigma shit he's on in the masters trainer lodge

rainbow rocket is kind of CRAZY to me because they take this mob boss who likes exploiting pokemon and scientists for money and they make him start. opening interdimensional bad ending au wormholes to take over the world with aliens. (also having him willing to share the power with all the other evil bosses, some who have in their universes Successfully taken over the world??? heeeellll no. not even my proposed toned down characterization of this guy would be cool with that realistically.) it all just seems to be Way Beyond what team rocket SHOULD be doing. they're The Mafia. making The Mafia open wormholes is CRAZY. but giovanni HAS to be the main guy because. Nostalgia.

idk how much sense i make when i say this but when you make team rocket less cunning and less focused on doing their work in the shadows and running their shady operations stealthily. you get. a more ambitious team skull. and there's nothing WRONG with team skull but it's NOT WHAT TEAM ROCKET IS SUPPOSED TO BE. they've got more of a reputation than that but modern depictions of giovanni and the organization as a whole water him down to "i love Causing Problems" and less "i love Good Business"

whatever. giovanni in modern depictions MAKES SENSE if you followed along the slow regression of his character in real time. but i feel like if you look where he is now and look where he Ended in r/b/y you have like. Two Different Characters. and i think having a redeemed or even kind-of-half-redeemed giovanni could be SO much more interesting in showing up again than having him be Generally Evil

AND IT'S NOT LIKE THAT REALLY POSES ISSUES FOR MASTERS EX. cyrus is half-reformed WITHIN the story. archie and maxie too (although they were already kind of like that). lysandre HAS an evil moment but he DOESN'T DIE like he does in canon and THEN he's FINE. he still "runs" team flare but he's NOT LONGER A THREAT TO THE PROTAGONISTS

what i think COULD'VE been cool in some hypothetical scenario is have giovanni come back for cameos but Not as team rocket's leader. have him Turn Down the rocket admin radio broadcast. hell, having him come back to help the player Stop Them if he feels particularly annoyed. LET THAT MAN GO ON VACATION. WHATEVER. there's SO MUCH you can do with him the way cameos are done for the Other non-evil characters and there are options where you could Still battle him as a Test Of Strength but THERE'S JUST. SO MUCH WRONG WITH HIM STILL BEING OVERTLY EVIL.

i understand keeping giovanni evil for nostalgia. i Get it i PROMISE i do. i just think it makes him a weaker character, and the companies sacrifice character development for sales. but if you wanted to have a bad guy who was JUST BAD and would CONTINUE to be bad if given the chance,

GHETSIS IS. RIGHT THERE.

that's the end of that for me i think. i'm SO down to discuss or debate this take for fun. i just think giovanni should retire and pet his cat because it's funny.

[ravilenn]

Asian!reader in Hogwarts (headcanons)

pt.1 - food shenanigans

this is mostly written for the jokes lol

_____________________________________________

. . .

• One week.

• It took one week for the Great Hall menu to grow unbearable for you after days of eating boiled vegetables and bland casseroles.

• And by the gods were you tired of it. You don't know how people can eat this for 7 years straight. And it gets even worse because Hogwarts doesn't have rice. No rice??? That's one way to give you a heart attack.

• It was at that moment when you decided to take matters into your own hands.

• So yeah, hence why you currently have a rice cooker in front of you on the table. Courtesy of your parents sending you one after hearing they didn't have rice over there (?!)

• Anyway, back to the present, where a few students are now eyeing you curiously.

• "What is this?"

- "That," you say, pointing at the perfectly ordinary looking device, "...is a rice cooker."

- Still met with confusion, you add, “You put rice in it. Press a button. Boom. Rice.”

• By this point, half the table is staring at you like you just told them Dumbledore did a cartwheel in the courtyard.

• “And why, do you need a... machine to do that-?”

- “Do you need a wand to do magic? No? Then don't question my rice cooker.”

• Flashforward the rice cooker is now declared a sacred artifact. Hogwarts finally has rice. The world is at peace.

.

.

.

• Well... that is until you decided to spice up the Hogwarts menu itself this time. Literally. Because this bland food has 'no soul'.

• According to who? You.

• Seriously, you'd think the British would've at least taken a cooking book when they colonized the world, but no-!

• You took your emergency stash of peppers and herbs and snuck into the kitchen.

• Too bad the house-elves caught you just as you were about to drop a peppercorn into one of their pots.

• “Miss, what’s this?” one of them asked, sniffing the spicy broth.

- “Freedom.”

(leaves dramatically)

• And since they didn't have time left to remake the food, they decided to serve it anyway and hope no one dies of food poisoning.

• Let's just say that they ran out of servings at record speed.

• Oh, and you now have several elves begging you to teach them the art of seasoning.

.

• So naturally by now, you're (kind of) well-known for your food shenanigans. Many of the house-elves and students are practically worshipping you ever since you introduced them to a plethora of new snacks.

• But of course there’s still a small group of skeptical people.

• A certain blonde from Slytherin named Draco Malfoy initially accused you of trying to poison him with your spices, but you could've sworn you saw him sneaking in a spring roll once.

• You also may have asked a house-elf to put wasabi in his mashed potatoes that evening, saying it would 'enhance the flavour'.

#revenge

.

Now, if you're in Gryffindor, you will dare your fellow housemates to eat some of your spiciest food.

#spicyfoodchallenge@gryffindor

• Dean Thomas for example once tried your chili-covered dried mango and immediately turned red. You could practically see the smoke coming out of his ears.

• Everyone cheered as he downed 3 goblets of pumpkin juice.

• And Thomas called you insane. (you were casually eating one of the snacks as if it wasn't the spiciest thing he's ever eaten right in front of him)

• You also may have sent Ron to the Hospital Wing once for feeding him spicy chili.

• Can no one here handle a little bit of spice?

.

In the meantime, the Hufflepuff now has weekly ramen parties at night.

• That's when you pull out your secret-not-so-secret stash of noodles and broth and prepare them in your cauldron for everyone.

• It's very cozy and calm, y'all just a happy bunch of Hufflepuffs enjoying some good ol' ramen.

• Professor Sprout pretends not to notice because she’s secretly a fan of your shrimp tempura ramen.

• You're thinking of introducing them to hotpot.

.

As for Ravenclaw, you introduced them to 'matcha mochi', because the green tea flavor is ideal for staying awake. You know they're night owls.

• They love you for that.

• It's a godsend during midterms.

.

Half of Slytherin probably owes you favors by now. And that's because you started a 'black market snack trade' where you trade various snacks for favors.

- "You help me with my Herbology homework, and I’ll give you a batch of my family’s special sweet soy sauce.”

• "Deal."

- “If you get the secret potion recipe from Snape’s personal notes, I’ll give you a month’s worth of homemade dumplings.” ...

.

You may have abused used this method several times to sweet-talk your way out of detention.

• “I’ll give you some of my homemade miso soup if you let me off with just a warning, Professor.”

• And surprisingly they agree too??? Most of the time. Snape still resists, but you could've sworn you saw him contemplating for a split second when you mentioned mochi.

• Isn't this bribery?

• You also accept gossip as payment btw 👍👍

.

• I honestly don't know where you get all of that food from. Must be the Asian power.

.

• By your fifth year, Asian cuisine pretty much became a standard during meals.

• So obviously, the first thing Umbridge does when she gets the authority is banning any 'non-tradidional' foods at Hogwarts, claiming it's to 'preserve the purity of the British cuisine', and because the spices and techniques are 'too disruptive' for a safe learning environment.

• You think she just can't handle anything spicier than salt.

• Hence why you teamed up with Fred and George to develop a secret line of 'banned snacks', like dumplings that explode into fireworks to get back at her.

• And it wouldn't be Fred and George if they didn't make anything funny like fortune cookies that make fun of Umbridge and her decrees.

• Which is, unsurprisingly, their most popular one.

• When you were eventually caught and interrogated by Umbridge, you just shrugged. “Asian cuisine has been perfected over centuries. You can’t just erase it with a decree, Professor. That’s like trying to ban magic itself!"

You're really passionate about your food, huh.

[weirdmageddon]

I'm taking the plunge because why not:

What are some headcanons regarding small, silly things that happened during the 3 year trips on the Golden Yard and Meteor?

oh lets go i love this sort of ask. no meteor crew stuff sorry im kinda tired but

on the prospitian ship:

the crocodiles are never recovering from that shit bro. un-stonks

alchemizing sessions. probably with mundane household devices like toothbrushes or something. patterned toilet paper. davesprite absolutely remakes the sbahjifier for himself but i think he also likes to hand draw them from time to time. also john and jade alchemizing bathing suits and going swimming on lolar and hanging with the turtles. casey can come too. floaties on casey

the sbahj canon diverges. so many sbahj in-jokes exclusive to the prospitian ship. unfortunately the retcon make it so none of this ever happens :(

he’d never say it but davesprite likes it when john and jade fall asleep on him doing whatever, it makes his presence feel wanted and appreciated by the people he sacrificed his self and humanhood for good for. sorry for immediately going into davesprite but good god is he tragic. oh yeah heres more. he’s still part dave and shares the same history with john and jade that alpha timeline dave does. john gave him his shades on his 13th birthday in december 2008, he sent john the con air bunny and jade a physical copy of sbahj as furries in the mail. he is identical to alpha dave in relation to his friends before the timeline splits off. dont forget that 4/13/2009 was also his first time meeting his online friends john and jade in person, even after 4 months chronologically of sburb grinding—nearly a year with all the time shenanigans—and going back to day 1, since john and jade were dead in his timeline

tries not to cry cries anyway but only when he knows theyre asleep. pov when the weight of everything suddenly hits you (you are an emotionally repressed 14 year old)

also because he’s fucking fluffy and absolutely knows it and probably thinks to himself “yeah this is the best possible use for these otherwise pointless breast feathers” and yall already know he craves cloth mother plus probably has nesting instincts

(source)

adding on to that also i think people forget sprites are actually fucking LONG and his wingspan is fucking huge he could be a pillow and a blanket at the same time

i wrote davesprite jade cuddles and john thinking about mushrooms and davesprite thinking about how they contribute to the ecnonony

^ john toked too hard on the lowas mushrooms by accident one time

it feels like pajama parties would be a common occurence just the vibes im getting. literally jade is seen sitting on a pile of squiddles and theres plushies fucking everywhere you know they got up to plushie mayhem. do you think they ever alchemized them. look how lived in that room is they all contributed something

jade resumes gardening :) but theres no sun :( but she alchemizes some plastic plants :D but its not the same :(

canonically the imps in johns house just gave up tormenting him and started hanging out and having snacks on movie night

PENIS!

imagine looking up into the sky and seeing a giant casey the size of a planet sleep. jade resizes stuff for fun like this just to introduce some novelty to their lives

this is something

davesprite has beavis and butthead do america (1996) in his collection somewhere in his apartment on lohac

yall theyre watching johns fuckin spongebob dvd box collection. you KNOW john owns the spongebob squarepants movie (2004). and the best thing is it brings all of them together without any of them objecting. they all love spongebob

when the episode jellyfish jam comes on johns like “wow, pretty much this exact scenario happened to me with the imps.” (arthur flashback sfx)

DAVESPRITE: yeah well you didnt have a giant sound system did you

jade warps dave’s bro’s sound system from lohac and sizes it up. they put on stadium rave and the entire fucking house shakes

[libbys-braincell-loss]

i became inspired so heres a silly oneshot smg34 fic that also includes mario and meggy

---

This fic includes:

snowtrapped reference. Sorry yall </3

shitty grammar whenever mario speaks

---

SMG43 crush frustrations, a 2 1/2 part oneshot

---

Segment 1: SMG4 and Mario

---

SMG4 sits at his desk, making videos, as per usual. Working hard to appease the hell that is the YouTube algorithm, all that good stuff.

SMG4 is just focused on working on making a decent video, trying his hardest to work in peace.

Suddenly, the door breaks down for the 17th time this week (it's tuesday), and SMG4's idiot best friend Mario bursts in to disturb said peace.

"ES EM GEE FOUR" he yells, startling his friend.

SMG4 sighs. "Hey, Mario, what do you need?"

"I just wanted to see what you were doing :))" Mario replies.

"I'm just making videos, that's all," SMG4 says, attempting to regain focus on making the video. "I gotta finish as much as I can before I have to hang out with SMG3 later today"

"Ooooo, watcha gonna be doin?"

"3's just gonna be streaming the two of us messing around on Gmod. I think he wants to play prop hunt?"

"Mario played that one time with him. He's too good at it," Mario recalls.

"Heh, as if. He only won cuz he was against you," SMG4 exclaims. "He won't stand a chance going against me."

Mario peeks over the chair and observes SMG4 making his video.

"Can Mario help???" Mario asks.

"Hahaha, no," said SMG4. "You don't know shit about editing."

"Lol ur right, im just bored af and wanted to do something" Mario says, eyes crossing. "What video you makin"

"I'm remastering an old video called 'Charming Peach'; people seem to like when I make remasters of old videos," SMG4 responds.

"Oooooooooo" says Mario. "Can I suggest a video idea?"

"Y'know what, sure. Go ahead."

"Snowtrapped remaster :))))"

SMG4's eyes widen. He turns and looks at Mario in the crossed eyes and humongous mustache.

"Hell no!"

"Hell yeah :)"

"Why would you suggest that?! I'm not doing that!"

"Why not?"

SMG4 blinks. "Why do you think?"

Mario shrugs. "Because it's too cold?"

SMG4 face palms. "I forgot; you don't think."

"Awww :(" Mario frowns. "Thats mean :(("

"Dude, SMG3 and I literally have sex in that episode."

"And?"

SMG4 blinks.

Mario blinks in return.

"AND WE WOULD RATHER DIE THAN REMAKE THAT? What do you want me to say?" SMG4 exclaims.

"You didn't enjoy it?" Mario asks.

SMG4's face turns bright red. "MARIO!! Why the hell would you ask that?!"

Mario blinks. He grins. "You're avoiding the question"

"I'm not answering the question. I'm not remaking Snowtrapped, period. SMG3 and I could never relive those events again."

Mario blinks one eye after the other, like a frog.

"Do you like him?" Mario asks out of the blue.

"Huh??" SMG4 says, red creeping on his face.

"Do you like SMG3?" Mario asks.

"I mean, yeah... as a... friend, of course."

"Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm..." Mario's eyes narrow, and his head widens as he stares directly into SMG4's soul. "Mario doesn't buy it."

"What? What do you mean?!"

"I think you are gay :)"

"No. Also can you stop talking in emoticons?" SMG4 sighs.

"Come on!! I'm pretty sure you like him in a gay way"

"Why do you have to say it like that?"

"huh"

"...Nevermind. No, I don't like him like that." SMG4 chuckles, like he's trying to gaslight himself into believing the words he says. "Why would I? He berates me every day, I can't stand him sometimes... Why would I be in love with someone who constantly tries to do some bullshit to piss me off?"

"But when you do get along, what then?"

SMG4 opens his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

"I just... I..."

Mario smiles really wide. "Youuuu liiikkkeee himmmm!"

"Mario, quit it!"

"Youuu dooooo :)"

"MARIO!"

"Youuuu likeee yourr rivaaaaalll :)))))"

SMG4 sighs, tired of trying to convince Mario otherwise. "Fine, you caught me. Yes, I may or may not have developed a crush on SMG3..."

Mario gasps with the utmost glee in his eyes.

"I KNEW IT!"

"Yeah, but you BETTER NOT TELL A SOUL!!" SMG4 puts a firm hand on Mario's shoulder and points at him aggressively.

Mario frowns. "you're no fun"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. I just don't want word to spread and for SMG3 to find out. Then he will really hate me, and not in the joking way he usually does."

"You think he hates you?" Mario tilts his head

"...Not really, but..."

"Then tell him!" Mario says.

"Haha, hell no. He is my rival, and even though we're able to... tolerate... each other for enough time, but SMG3 is very keen to remind me that we are 'rivals', and refuses to admit that we are friends, no matter how much we get close to admitting we are friends."

SMG4 looks down. "I do really like him, I just... I have no way of knowing if he does like me at all, and if he is being serious when he shit talks me. Maybe he thinks and talks about how stupid I am when I'm not hanging out with him. He probably hates me, with how much he berates me. Why would I want someone who hates me?"

Mario blinks. "You are dumping all this info on someone who has zero advice for you" he says.

SMG4 smiles sadly. "My bad. I just... it's been eating me up inside, I just wanted to vent about it."

"Its ok :) mario can try to give advice if you want!" Mario says.

SMG4 sighs. "Go ahead."

"Mario thinks that if SMG3 hated you so much, he wouldn't go out of his way to be around you"

"Huh? What do you mean?"

"He frequently shows up to hang out with you, he saves you, he talks about you a lot..."

"Wait, he does?"

"Yeah! I was waiting to get a bomb at his coffee shop and he was in a corner writing in his journal again, and he was saying everything he was writing out loud; he was saying 'I'm excited to hang out with smg4 tomorrow, we gonna play some gmod together and im totally gonna beat his ass at prop hunt, hes gonna be so mad itll be so funny, seeing his face so angry is so entertaining-' and then he stopped writing cuz he saw me waiting for my bomb order and he shoo'd me out of there and i didn't get my bomb"

SMG4 blushes. "Huh. So, he does shit talk me outside of my earshot, but in a positive way..." He smiles ear to ear. "Mario, honestly, I cannot believe I'm saying this, but your advice actually helped. I think my intrusive thoughts were just trying to lie to me. I needed to hear that."

"Yay! Mario's glad he could help :)" Mario says, smiling. "This is my character development! I am therapist :)"

SMG4 chuckles. "Mario, I would not trust you as a therapist 100% of the time."

Mario smirks. "But you can trust SMG3 as your therapist-"

SMG4 punches Mario's arm "Shush. This stays between us, okay?"

"yeah B) i gotchu"

"Thanks, man."

---

Segment 2: SMG3 and Meggy

---

Meggy steps into SMG3's coffee shop, 3's Coffee and Bombs. The cafe was very empty, there was little to no people there.

"Hello? SMG3?" she calls out.

SMG3 pops out from the kitchen.

"Ah, Meggy! Welcome to 3's Coffee and Bomb's!" SMG3 exclaims with a grand flourish. "How may I serve you?"

"Hey dude, I came here two days ago," Meggy says, deadpan. "You don't need to make a grand spectacle everytime I show up."

"Yeah, yeah. What'll it be? Coffee or bombs?"

"I'd like some coffee today. I think I'm gonna go for some black coffee today."

"Daring today, aren't we?" SMG3 says, in a sarcastic tone.

"Look, I'm trying to expand my horizons. Try new things. Every time I drink coffee, it's sweet as hell. I'mma take something bitter for once."

"If you say so," SMG3 says.

SMG3 makes Meggy her coffee and Meggy gives him his money. SMG3's watch beeps.

"Oh! Looks like it's break time!" he says.

"Nice! Care to join me?" Meggy suggests.

"Sure, why not," SMG3 says, shrugging. He makes himself some coffee of his own and sits at a table across from Meggy.

"I heard you have plans on doing a stream collab with SMG4 today," Meggy comments. "You guys are playing Gmod, right?"

"Yeah!" SMG3 sips his coffee. "I'm gonna kick his ass in prop hunt. He will be so pissed."

"Haha, I see," Meggy says, taking a sip of her coffee. She spits it back into the cup.

"Rude," SMG3 frowns.

"It's not that you're bad at making coffee, it's that black coffee isn't the right coffee for me," Meggy responds, also frowninh. "Don't take so much offense to everything."

"Welp." SMG3 leans back in his chair. "I'm excited. I can't wait to absolutely destroy his ass in games I'm goated at."

"Aren't you just happy you get to hang out with 4?" Meggy remarks.

"...Hanging out with him to make him look like a loser on stream, yes!" SMG3 responds.

Meggy smirks. "I think you do enjoy his company."

SMG3 studies a speck on the ceiling. "Says who?"

"Says me. I know you like him."

SMG3's face immediately turns bright red.

"NUH UH!" SMG3 exclaims. "He's stupid and a moron and a loser! W-why would I be attracted to a- a loser like him?!"

Meggy looks him dead in the eye. "I was gonna say opposites attract, but you guys are both oblivious AND obvious dumbasses, so you guys have more in common than you like to admit."

SMG3 looks away. "I don't like him. He probably hates me, with how much I berate him. Why would I want someone who hates me?"

Meggy smiles.

"3, I think 4 is just as in love with you as you are with him."

"What makes you think I like him?" quizzes SMG3.

"Oh, you constantly talk about how excited you are to do anything with him, you pout when he's not around, and you're usually the first person to try to instigate helping him as soon as he's in trouble," Meggy recounts.

SMG3 blushes. "We're Meme Guardians; if one of us isn't around, our powers are very minimal. I'm just looking out for him because I don't know what happens to one Meme Guardian the moment his counterpart is dead, and I don't want to find out."

"Awww, you care about him!" Meggy smiles.

"Just talk to him, dumbass," Meggy said. "He usually functions better once people communicate their issues with him. If you ask if you take things too far, and if he feels hurt by your words, talking it out is the right thing."

"Shush. So what if I do? He would never like me back. He probably can't stand me. I berate and belittle him too much. I know, I know, it's bad, but... I don't know how to communicate appreciation to people I care about. Teasing is all I know, but I never know if I've pushed it's limit-"

"But that's so difficult! I'm no good at communication!" SMG3 complains.

"You're a therapist! This is the type of advice you give your patients!" Meggy responds.

"I'm a hypocrite!" SMG3 wails.

"Look, just talk to him at some point. Maybe after the stream is over, just take some time out of your day to figure out how SMG4 feels about your constant teasing, then go from there."

"Yeah. Y'know what, I'll keep that in mind. Thanks Meggy."

"No problem! And, while you're at it, you should totally go for it!" Meggy exclaims, beaming.

"Meggy..." SMG3 sighs.

"I know you like him, you can't keep hiding."

SMG3 groans even louder.

"Yes, but you tell no one, okay?" SMG3 orders.

"Of course," Meggy says, smiling.

---

SMG4 and SMG3 are up in SMG4's office, playing and streaming Gmod shenanigans. Mario is sitting on the couch in the gaming room, watching TV. Meggy comes in and joins Mario on the couch.

"SMG4 and SMG3 can't be any more obvious, can they?" she remarks.

"they gay as hell," Mario agrees.

"3 confirmed he does like 4," Meggy says.

Mario laughs maliciously.

"What?" asks Meggy.

"mario also got SMG4 to confirm he likes 3 >:)," Mario says.

"Ha," Meggy says, "Cool. Do you think they'll ever actually get together?"

"hmmmmmm, Maybe!" Mario answers. "But if they don't, it's incredibly funny to watch their gay struggling, so we can keep watching it for a while"

"I like your thinking, Red," Meggy smirks. "Let's just let them be for the time being."

[korshrimpski]

KEVIN KORCHINSKI APPRECIATION POST

Hello, this is a remake of a post i made last season and i'm making it because 1. love kevin 2. can't stop thinking of how shit my old post was lol, so a remake is need (you won't find the og post because i deleted it)

1. let's start with some base things. he was drafted 7th overall in the 2022 draft to chicago

2. he's a defenceman

3. his rookie season was last year. he struggled a bit and is going to play in the AHL this year for the rockford icehogs

4. he got 5 goals and 10 assist

5. his dynamic with connor bedard is so sweet. They were both rookies for the chicago blackhawks last year but before that they played on team canada (wjc) 2023 together.

6. In warms ups connor would glide in bump into kevin, kevin would bump/push him back and connor would spin (x) (x.2) (x.3)

7. they also got their first fine together 🤗 (they went no bucket for their rookie lap and got fined)

8. since kevin and connor's whl teams never played each other they bicker about which team would have hypothetically beaten the other in a match up

9. kevin and connor combined to defeat the leafs in OT last season and it was beautiful

10. if you want more kevin and connor content here is a list of videos for you to watch:

Every Shift Season 1 Episode 5: Ambition to Action | 15:06-15:20

Every Shift Season 2 Episode 6: Great Expectations | timestamps; 1:37-4:20

(INSTAGRAM video)

they did a podcast together (it is a very painful watch because of the host :/)

11. he has a youtube channel (the name of which i cannot remember which makes me so sad) but it is him doing backflips or talking about hockey

12. speaking of him having a youtube channel- he was asked if he could be an influencer and he said he would try and then fail

13. there is a scar under his eye that he got when he was playing in the WHL conference finals and got high sticked in game one

14. the reason he decided to go to the WHL was to follow in his fathers' footsteps and so they have something to bond over (x 0:00-0:45)

15. kevin speaks really high of his dad as he is one of his main inspirations

16. literally whenever there is a single post about him people default to the "hi kevin" video/gif from spongebob lol

17. he used to play the piano because his mum wanted one of her kids to learn piano so kevin was put in piano. In year 9 he quit to focus on hockey. But he still likes playing piano for his mum

18. but kevin likes music and can play guitar, ex.1, ex.2,

19. here's him singing a zach bryan song with alex vlasic x

20. speaking of zach bryan, kevin is a big country fan

21. he is also a big coldplay fan because of his dad

22. his favourite show is suits

23. he was a very energetic kid and because of that his grandad called him "energy bunny" (x)

24. his hockey habit is that he has to change his laces every game. if they're a pair of laces he likes he'll keep them for a couple of games. he also has to retie his laces after every period

25. he is competitive with big sister whenever they play cards | timestamp: 10:26-10:56

26. he was at school for a test, when his friend told him he got drafted to the Seattle Thunderbirds (x)

27. during his rookie season, colin blackwell took kevin under his wing. they would drive together to practice some days and colin teached kevin who to cook steak

28. there is an amazing video of kevin and sam savioe singing shallow by lady gaga in colins car that i have to show you, like it's beautiful x

29. he might be real or not idk his existence is debated

[alxandergoth]

I LOVE RANDOM ASK HOUR!!!

Top 5 books?

Top 5 movies?

Favorite TV show(s)?

Favorite games aside from Sims?

Funniest thing you’ve said out of context?

Do you have any pets? If so, can we see a picture? If not, do you want any?

Favorite animal? (The more oddly specific the better. I’m a zoology major.)

Song lyric that shreds you into pieces?

Song currently stuck in your head?

YOU GET ITTT!! thank u for this! 🫶🏻

top 5 books:

am i like the worst person in the world if i say i actually haven't read many books 🥴 i mainly read fanfic these days but i did read the hunger games books and they're probably my faves

top 5 movies:

1. almost famous 2. rocky horror picture show 3. scream 4. moulin rouge! 5. it (2017 remake)

favourite TV show(s)?

stranger things 911 supernatural interview with the vampire hannibal yellowjackets

favourite games aside from sims?

baldurs gate 3 the dark pictures anthology games until dawn resident evil 7 gta v mario kart

funniest thing you’ve said out of context?

oof tough one bc i do this a lot and my memory is bad so i literally can't remember anything rn 😭

do you have any pets? if so, can we see a picture? if not, do you want any?

i have a cat! her name is rosie <3 i also had another cat named splish but he sadly passed away two years ago (pics: rosie on the left, splish on the right)

favourite animal?

i'm super boring my fave animal is cats 😭

song lyric that shreds you into pieces?

tbh the whole of claw machine by sloppy jane & phoebe bridgers

song currently stuck in your head?

party 4 u by charli xcx