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#also this has sat in my drafts for like two months LMAO
wildcxrds · 4 months
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true intentions
(Note: the italicized text is not spoken in English, but in their native tongue, A’irth.)
The late afternoon was gray and muggy, with the skies cloudy and a small drizzle falling over the land. This area was far from any of the remaining kingdoms and cities, closest actually to a long abandoned village in the heart of a desolate field. In a corner of the large, barren field, under leafless, gnarled trees, there was a small tent was pitched up - larger on the inside than it seemed on the outside. Outside, it was incredibly unassuming and honestly seemed abandoned. Inside, it had the essentials - on thin wooden floors, there were two beds tucked in a small room across from the entrance, a couple tables at the forefront, a small kitchenette propped against the canvas walls to the left, and a few large wicker bins filled with supplies on the right.
Sat at one of the tables was Kori, focused as he was carefully disinfecting a particularly nasty wound on Kairo’s shoulder. It wasn’t bleeding, thankfully, but the wound spread from her shoulder nearly to her collarbone and had begun to turn a nasty, bruised purple. Kori gauged from the wound that she had left it for a day or so to see if it would get better on its own before summoning him. One of many injuries she retained living in the desolate lands, encountering various others who challenged her strength.. and her temper.
They had a brief lapse in conversation, having been making some catch up small talk since the last time they’d seen each other was a few months ago.
“So what’s the prognosis?” Kairo asked.
“It’ll take some time - with the way your body rapid heals, likely two weeks at the most.” Kori replied, spraying a thin layer of the antibiotic, earning a displeased hiss from Kai. “Sorry,” He added, genuinely apologetic.
“It’s fine. I can wait the two weeks.” Kairo sighed slowly, and Kori watched the skin around the festering wound cautiously for any reaction. It would take the wound itself time to close, but she was adapting quickly with the antibiotic and recovering from the infection rapidly, as he watched edges of the purple tinge already begin to fade. He redirected his attention back to Kairo, recalling the last time they’d seen each other, she had a small group of other thieves with her.
“So what happened to the company you kept?” He asked, suspecting he knew what the answer was.
“Killed them.” Kairo replied, shrugging her good shoulder. Not a response he was surprised by, honestly.
“What is it they’d done?” Satisfied that he’d applied enough of the antibiotic, he moved on to carefully applying medicated gauze to the wound and wrapping it up.
“Tried to steal from me. They slipped something in my drink to make me sleep and attempted to rob my gold. Their little greedy hands didn’t account for my tolerance and how quickly I can get up and fight, even inebriated.” She said matter-of-factly, picking at a spot on her sleeveless tunic, haphazardly cropped to account for the heat and humidity (and her personal comfort). “Happened last month.” She vaguely gestured to the wound on her shoulder, and the now mostly healed claw marks down her arm.
“You never seem to do well traveling with others.” Kori commented lightly. “The only time you have was when you were part of that brothel.”
“It would go better if they didn’t tunnel vision consistently on stealing from me. They should know better than to test my patience. It doesn’t matter anymore, I’m no longer interested in groups. I have other things in mind once I’ve recovered.”
“Oh?” Kori’s brows rose. In the time he’s known Kai, her goals have been primarily short-term. The longest goal she’d ever had was… well, keeping out of the Hunters’ radar.
“It’s something I’ve asked of you.” She said flatly, looking at him with her mouth tightening and her gaze hardening slightly.
Kori’s breath caught nervously. They were revisiting a subject they’d circled around many times in the past. He frowned deeply. “Kairo, I—”
“I know,” She interrupted, “you don’t approve and whatnot, but I’m sorry to tell you that I don’t really care. I want to find the human realm.”
Kori frowned. He knew better now than to try and convince her otherwise - she had made her mind up and if Kairo was anything, she was incredibly stubborn. “And do what? You risk exposing yourself to the Hunters - it seems counterintuitive to what you’ve been doing so far.” He tightened his jaw, as a wave of realization swept over him. “That’s why you’ve been in so many different groups.”
“So smart.” Kairo sighed, leaning away from him in her seat. “Sometimes the best sanctuary is right under their nose. Nobody but you knows this portal exists, and they don’t know who you are or if you’ve found the portal. You’ve had no tracking, so how would they find me there?” She half-turned back to face him. “I’m not looking to run for much longer, Kori. I’m going to find who’s running this operation, and I’ll kill them myself.”
“Revenge.” Kori frowned.
“Justice.” Kai corrected through gritted teeth, a dangerous flare in her eye.
“That’s a suicide mission, Kairo—“
“No more of that.” Kai interrupted again. “It’s going to happen whether you’re by my side or not. I appreciate and respect our friendship, but if this will be something I do alone, then so be it.” Her tone grew sharp and Kori sighed. She held her gaze at him, peeling away at the already fragile layers of counter arguments to find and force him to relent.
“…Very well. I will give you a general direction, but that is all. Do you have a plan of disguise?”
“I’ll figure it out as I go along.” Kairo nodded, satisfied that she’d worn him down. “I want to sleep soon, so that you can get your rest. You look like shit.”
A small interruption of a tense discussion, Kori suspected. Kairo was hard headed, brash, and usually not very emotional, if at all (outside of her temper), but he suspected she likely felt… at least a touch guilty for putting him on edge. “We’ll be finished soon.”
He completed cleaning up the worst of her worse wounds and bandaging them properly, and within the hour, she had gone to sleep.
Only a few hours passed before it was Kori’s turn. He knew Kairo was capable of resting up in a handful of hours, but despite his protests and insistence that she could sleep a little longer, he was forced to bed while she took watch at the entrance of the tent. And despite the World Eater clawing at the edges of his mind as he attempted to meditate to relax, he felt himself drift off eventually.
-
There was warmth in the darkness. Something pressed gently to his chest. Hi, it said, but not in A’irth. He mentally switched to match its language, realizing it was speaking in Feli’airth.
Who are you?
It didn’t respond, instead the warmth spreading and a light bloomed before him, revealing the sight of a small form curled under a blanket, and a figure made of solid green overlooking the form with a sort of protective aura. The room looked vaguely like a human living room. This figure in green whispered, This is going to be the start of a new story. The voice was deeply familiar, reaching for the threads of Protector woven tightly around his soul. His heart clenched anxiously. Was this the Guardian speaking to him?
Look down, they said. He saw a dormant thread of gold leading down to the form. Impossible. Was this-?
Hi.., the voice said again, tentatively. Now the form was standing before him, holding both his hands and pressing them to his chest. He gripped the front of his tunic.
I know you, he said to them. They giggled.
Guide me home, they requested shyly. This was a vision; he hadn’t had one since his first reunion with Kairo. Please.
He nodded firmly, and he felt the warmth begin to fade. I’ll see you soon! They giggled again, this time in relief, the warmth pulling away from his grasp, like a candle burning out, the embers dissipating to nothingness.
S̷̡̪̦̝͔̄́͂̚͝͝o̸̡̨̥̘̖̚m̸̝̥̫͓͊͛̀ę̸̛͓̬̆̒́̾t̸̢̺͐͐̕ḧ̶͍̯̩́͠i̴̛͙͊̍̈ͅn̵͖͐ǵ̸̱͖̠̪͋͊̚ ̸̨̼̱̰͇̝̈͂ņ̶̨̛̻̼͉͚͒̽̍̋͊e̷̛̝̼̟̦̩̼̊̔̔̕w̴̨͈̝̯̆̊̄̒̃?̸̣͓̠͓̿̽̑̅
Kori jolted awake, inhaling sharply. Painful buzzing vibrated under his skin from where the seals were. Even barely awake, he grit his teeth against the zaps, feeling the magic work through to keep his darker half at bay.
He stared at the canvas ceiling above, the edges of his sleep creeping away from him, consolidating in his mind that this trip of Kairo’s into the human realm, as dangerous as it was, could potentially prove to be the start of the right path. If potentially he could slowly convince Kairo out of seeking the Hunters…
This vision told him all he needed to know - they were going to meet a new Protector. This was good. A very very very good sign. Kori would take any optimism he could get.
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nickfowlerrr · 2 years
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taking care
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pairing: soft!dark nick fowler x curvy!reader
warnings: innocent/naïve reader. violence. mentions of blood. mean!nick. mentions of injury. minor character death. smut. choking. gun violence. pet names. hair pulling. spanking. i think i’m missing stuff so please let me know if you think anything else should be tagged!
words: 7.4k
notes: this fic has been sitting in my drafts for a couple weeks and i haven’t reread it in a while so apologies for any errors. genuinely idk where this story went and i know i didn’t bother trying to make it make much sense - it was really just an excuse to write nick fowler smut and then this all just kinda came along with it lmao. also - can i just say that i am big anti baths but honestly, i’d get in a tub with this man any day of the week 😙
i feel like, by now, we should all know not to expect well written endings from me and this fic is no exception. idk man lol
as always feedback and comments are always welcome. thank you for reading and reblogging 💜
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“I really wanted to trust you, sweetheart,” he said, sounding disappointed as he stared down at you. “I was so sure I could trust you.”
“What?” you said, taken aback by his words as you stared up at him from where you were made to kneel in between his legs. “You..you can. You know you can,” you continued, trying to hide your hurt though you were sure it was written clear as day on your face.
His hand was caressing your cheek softly as his eyes continued to gaze stoically into yours - giving nothing away.
When you had gotten home, after putting away the groceries in the kitchen, you found him in the den. He was just sitting in his chair near the fireplace- the glow of the flames illuminating him and accentuating the sharpness of his facial structure. He sat there, almost unmoving - looking like a work of art.
You were going to call to him, but were instead momentarily stunned by the sight of him before his clear, blazing blue eyes suddenly shot to yours as he heard you enter. His gaze froze you to your spot with the chill it sent through you. He stared at you a moment before speaking.
“Come here, princess,” he called to you.
You blinked at him before making your way over. You had heard that pet name many times before, but something about the way he said it was different now. It sounded wrong, cold. So unlike the wickedly sweet way it normally sounded coming from his lips.
When you were stood right before him, he grabbed your hands in his and pulled you down, urging you to lower yourself onto your knees before him.
To say you were confused at his words would be an understatement. You had been with Nick for the past two years and had started living together just around the first. He had moved you into his home with him a few months shy of your one year anniversary, promising you it would be perfect. And the place itself was perfect. It was in a newer, quite expensive, neighborhood with few neighbors living in the houses near his.
And his house was amazing. High tech and as luxury as you had ever seen in person. You had no qualms about the place you’d be moving to, you were just a little trepidatious, worried things were moving too fast. But of course, Nick convinced you it wasn’t too soon, that when you loved like you loved one another, these things could never be rushed. Not when it was always meant to be. You’d get to spend more time together, you’d save money on rent, and he’d be able to keep an eye on you - to keep you even safer.
You knew Nick’s line of work was dangerous, but you never felt worried about something bad happening to you. You knew he’d never let that happen. You were always his top priority, and had been since the day he first laid eyes on you. Rather, your concerns were in regards to his safety. When he would come home after long weeks away, you finally felt like you’d be able to breathe again. He’d always call or message when he could, but of course you’d still worry. Especially on occasions when he’d get home bloody and bruised. Sometimes you thought it hurt you more than him. But you were always there waiting for him. Always there to patch him up and take care of him when he needed you. And you always would be. You’d promised him as much.
You were closer to Nick than you had ever been with anyone and you’d never felt such an intense connection the way you did with him. You never knew how deep love could be before you met him. You would trust him with your life. You did trust him with your life. And after all this time, you thought he felt the same.
But apparently not.
You weren’t sure what had come over him or what exactly brought this on, but his current behavior was unsettling to say the least. You felt like he was keenly watching every little movement you made and taking note of each reaction you had as he stared at you. Looking for some sort of tell, something that would betray your innocence. But what did he think you were guilty of?
Whatever it was, he wouldn’t find anything. You hadn’t done anything to cause him to question his trust in you, you were sure of it.
“You don’t have to lie, sweetheart. There’s no point now, anyway,” he said as his fingers ghosted along your cheek.
“Nick, I swear,” you said, shaking your head in confusion. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.
What are you trying to accuse me of?”, your hurt even more evident now, “I haven’t done anything wrong,” you insisted earnestly.
It was only when he brushed his knuckles along your cheek that you dared to move. You gingerly grabbed his hand in yours and as you pulled it down to hold it, you then saw the blood and bruising. You looked up at him, eyes wide as you finally took his appearance in more closely. You noticed what appeared to be dried blood stains on his crisp white shirt, but as you scanned his face to see if he was hurt, you found no sign of injury. So the blood wasn’t his.. The only give away he was injured at all was his hand. No, hands, you realized as you pulled away only slightly to run your eyes over him again, needing to be sure he wasn’t hurt, before you noticed the bloody knuckles on his left hand, matching his right.
You weren’t new to seeing Nick like this, but you were normally more prepared. If he was due home from a mission, you knew what to expect. You had time to prepare and steel yourself against the sight of him possibly walking through the door wounded and bloody. He wasn’t normally a hands on kind of guy. He preferred to avoid hand to hand combat when he could, “less messy,” he’d say. But from the looks of him, it seemed he had been in some kind of altercation. You just couldn’t think of how that would have happened in the few hours you had been out. It’s not like he had been gone on an assignment, he hadn’t had any work since he came back last week. So when did this happen? Why did this happen? Why was he sitting here looking the way he was? Treating you like you were in on some conspiracy against him.
“Princess,” he tutted as his eyes burned into yours and his expression grew harsher. Your hand in his, being squeezed tighter. “You’re gonna need to stop lying to me, before I get even more upset.”
“I’m not lying,” you stressed again. “Please - please, just tell me what’s wrong. What happened?”
“You really thought I wouldn’t notice the little hushed conversations you’d have with him every time you’d go out?” He dropped your hand from his and you moved further back from him as he leaned closer to your face, scrutinizing every emotion that passed your eyes. His question served only to confuse you further because you really, truly had no idea what he was talking about or to whom he was referring.
“Don’t play stupid, baby. It’s not gonna work this time,”
This time? What was that supposed to mean? You wanted to ask, but knew better than to let it slip from your lips. He was obviously upset and lashing out, and you knew you needed to figure out what he was going on about before he was too angry to deal with. Nick would never hurt you, you knew that, but he had a way of taking his anger and frustrations out on you that would leave you feeling him for days. Normally you didn’t mind, but seeing as his ire was now directed, in part, at you, you felt a little more… nervous. He had never spoken to you like this before and you certainly were not a fan of it. He was making you feel uneasy.
“Nick, I honestly have no clue what you’re talking about or even who you’re talking about,”
“I saw you on your way out earlier, princess. What did you tell him, hm? What did he say to you to get you to smile so pretty for him?”
You sat there, mouth agape and brows furrowed as he spoke so condescending towards you. You thought back to when you were leaving today, who had you seen on your way out? Who had you talked to? The only person you could think of was Johnathan.
Yeah, it was Johnathan. He stopped you on your way to your car, asking about when would be a good time for a double date night with you and Nick and him and his wife. He’d been trying to set something up for a while, since they had moved in a few months back. Nick was evasive the couple of times Johnathan had caught him outside - always asking when you two were free. It was odd, certainly, but you had never thought anything of it. Only that he seemed to be a friendly neighbor, maybe overly so, but nothing more.
And certainly Nick knew better than to assume anything more than friendly, courteous conversation was happening between the two of you anytime you may have spoken. You were just being polite.
“This is about Jonathan?” you asked, almost disbelieving. “Seriously, Nick? He said hello and asked about you, like he always does before I told him I had to get going. That was it. That can’t be why you’re so upset. Will you please, just tell me what happened?” you tried asking again as you reached for one of his hands to examine more closely.
“Let me get you cleaned up and-,” you soothed before you found yourself being shoved down onto your back. The movement was sudden and unexpected. As you found yourself pinned down onto the hardwood floor, Nick on top of you, his hand wrapped firmly around your neck as his ice blue eyes raged with betrayal, you didn’t have time to scream and only managed to squeak out in protest before he spoke. He was mere inches from your face as your hands instinctively grabbed onto his forearm while he held you tighter.
“I told you to stop lying,” he spit out as you stared up at him in complete shock. You tried to speak but the hold he had on you, the way he was choking you made it nearly impossible. He stared into your frightened eyes for a moment before he loosened his hand from your throat and you coughed out, desperately trying to regain your breath as your head lolled to the side. He immediately grabbed your face and brought you back to looking directly up at him while you heaved.
“I’m not lying, Nick! What the hell is wrong with you?” you cried beneath him, trying to push him off but getting nowhere. He ignored your words, clearly not satisfied with your answer and seemingly unphased by your fighting against him as he continued staring into your eyes. When you stopped thrashing, he let out a heavy breath, letting his head fall slightly, his forehead against yours.
“I’ve already forgiven you, princess. I promise. I just need you to tell me the truth now so we can move past this,” he bargained as his thumb brushed away the tears that had fallen down your cheeks.
You stared perplexed yet again as your brows returned to their furrowed position.
“The truth? The truth is I haven’t done anything. I still have no idea what you’re talking about or what happened while I was gone- I-”
You were interrupted by Nick scoffing and huffing as he hauled you roughly up from the floor. He had a tight grip on your arm as he pulled you to him. You crashed into him with the force of his pull before he spun you so you were in front of him, your back now to his chest, as he urged you to walk in front of him while he led from behind.
“I really didn’t want to do this the hard way, sweetheart, but you’re leaving me with no choice.” he said as he moved you both to the garage. “You’re gonna tell me the truth, in your own words, one way or another.” he promised.
As he shoved the door open from behind you and urged you in, you were stunned by the sight you were met with. You gasped in shock as you stared at your unconscious, bloodied and beaten neighbor tied to a chair. The walls of the normally empty garage and the floor beneath him were covered in plastic. You were genuinely lost and felt like you were on a delay as you just continued to stare, begging your mind to catch up.
What had Nick done in the few hours you had been gone and why?
“Let’s start off easy,” he began as he spoke into your ear. “How long?”
“How long, what?” you stuttered out in a whisper.
“How long have you been planning this? How long have you been working with him?”
“Working wi- what? Working with him? What are you talking about, Nick? What the hell is happening?”
“He said you’ve been in on it since before we met.. But I know that’s not true. Can’t be. Because I’m the one who found you, not the other way around. I don’t believe you’re that conniving and I know you’re not that smart. So, tell me. When did he get into contact with you and when did you decide to work with him, huh?”
“He said what?” you asked shrilly. “I swear to God, Nick, I met him when you did. I’d never seen him before in my life. And I wasn’t working with him on anything? What does- what does that even mean? Look, I don’t know what happened, I don’t know what he told you, but he’s lying. Whatever he told you, he was lying! And how could you believe him,” you finished, your voice on the verge of breaking.
He stayed quiet for a minute, then his grip left your arms. You stayed still in your spot while he was still close behind you, close enough that you felt it when he was reaching for something. You weren’t sure what he was doing until he moved his arms to wrap around your waist lightly as his hands crossed in front of you. As you slowly looked down at his hands, you saw his pistol being held in his right hand. He leaned down to rest his head on your shoulder as you continued to stay as still as you could.
“Nick,” you nearly whimpered. He sighed, nodded his head and placed a gentle kiss on your neck before he spoke.
“I believe you,” he said, standing up straight.
It happened so fast. You had instinctively turned around into Nick the second you saw him raise his gun. With his left hand, he pushed you out of the way as he stepped in front of you and aimed his pistol at Jonathan - firing a single shot into him without a second of hesitation. You jumped at the sound of the shot as you were looking away from the scene while your eyes watered and your hands covered your mouth as you silently gasped in shock.
Nick put his gun down on the workstation next to him and turned to you, walking to where you were standing. He didn’t say anything as he pulled you into his chest as he wrapped his arms around you before moving a hand to hold your head against him as he tried to comfort you.
“Sorry, angel. You’re so gullible, so easily persuaded into things, I just had to be sure,” he began as he moved to walk you back into the house. His calm was a stark contrast to your terror filled debilitation.
“He got inside after you left and tried to sneak up on me. Honestly, he’s probably the worst trained agent I’ve ever come across. I heard him coming from a mile away.”
You were back in the house, he guided you to the den and sat you down on the chair he had been previously occupying in front of the fire. You were clearly in shock as he continued speaking.
“Got him tied up in the garage, I told him to talk but he didn’t want to. Took a little work, but eventually he broke and told me all about his secret assignment. And then,” he paused, taking a deep breath before letting out a light scoff, “he brought up you,” he said as he caressed your face gently.
“And each time your name left his mouth, I couldn’t stop myself from punching the living fuck out of him. He passed out and I came inside and waited for you to get back. You know, he was shitty at every other part of his job, but he sure knew how to get under my skin.. The rational part of my brain kept telling me he was full of shit, I knew he was, I just- I hated even having to think about the possibility it was true.
“But sweetheart,” he said as he grabbed your face, making sure you were looking him in the eye before he continued. “I want you to know that even if you had been working for him, with him, whatever, that I would have forgiven you.
“I know you weren’t, I know you didn’t, but if you had, we would’ve moved past it. Because no matter what, we belong together. You’re mine. And I know how much you love me. I know you’d do anything for me. And I’m sorry I had any doubt.”
He was squatting down in front of you as you were finally starting to process everything. Your breathing became quicker and quicker and your mind was racing.
“His wife, Nick. What about his wife? She’s gonna- she’s gonna be looking for him. What are we gonna do? What do we do? He’s- he’s, he’s dead, Nick. He’s dead. In our garage. What do we do?” you rambled as you began to cry again, leaning forward into him desperately.
He pulled you to stand up and held you once again.
“There’s nothing to worry about, sweetheart. I already sent some people over to his house. There was no one living there but him. He’d been staking us out since he moved in. Working for some rebel agency after he was dismissed in the academy. Never even made it into the bureau. But don’t worry, it’s all taken care of, I promise. No one’s missing him except whoever sent him, and we already have plans on how we’re gonna deal with that,” he assured you.
You stayed in his embrace, the only source of comfort you had. You were still upset and you wanted him to know it, but you didn’t want to lose his touch or push him anymore than he had been pushed today by getting angry and blowing up at him after everything.
“I wasn’t working with or for him. I have never told him anything about you,” you said quietly into his chest as your lip wobbled. “How could you accuse me of doing something like that?” you asked as you pulled back to look at him, his eyes much softer now and full of sorries. “You’re my everything, you know that. I love you, I would never go behind your back. I would never want to get you hurt in any way.
“I would never do that to you. I could never do that to you.”
He leaned down and placed a gentle kiss to your lips, pressing his forehead to yours as he nodded.
“I know, princess. I know. I’m sorry,” he said solemnly. You just hugged him tighter as he held you.
“Your hands,” you suddenly remembered. “Let’s go upstairs,” you said.
“Hey, angel,” he stopped you from pulling him further, “I think you’re still in shock. I just shot a man in front of you, you don’t need to be taking care of me right now. I’m taking care of you.” You stared at him a moment in silence, gently biting your lip trying to keep yourself together.
“You killed him,” you said bleakly.
“I killed him, yeah. I shouldn’t have done that in front of you, I’m sorry.”
“He was trying to kill you first, though,”
“Yeah, he was.”
“And he was trying to make you believe I was in on it,” you added.
“Yes.”
You just nodded against his chest as you leaned into him again.
“He had it coming, but that has nothing to do with me doing it right in front of you. Don’t try to rationalize the trauma,” he lightly chuckled. He was pretty accustomed to death. He had seen his fair share of it and his hands obviously weren’t clean of anyone’s blood, either. Though that certainly wasn’t something he ever wanted for you.
“It’s normally pretty difficult for people the first time they see someone die,” he said softly.
“The first time?” you said, sounding stressed. “The only time. First and last,” you said seriously.
“First and last,” he promised.
You later found yourself wrapped in your bath towel, sitting on the edge of your bed while Nick dried himself off with his own. You had cleaned his hands yourself before he ran a bath for the both of you. Sitting in the bubbles, you just laid with him in the warm water while his hands trailed up and down your body. You didn’t talk, just enjoyed his presence. That was until the realization that you could have actually lost him today hit you.
You looked up at him and tugged him closer to you as your eyes threatened to spill over with tears. Nick hushed you softly as he kissed your head.
“I can’t lose you,” you whispered.
“You aren’t going to, princess,” he assured you. You soaked a little while longer before you moved to the shower together. You were now clean and a lot more relaxed after being comforted by him all night long.
Nick moved over to you, standing before you as you sat on the bed. You looked up to him with a small pout and puppy eyes and just raised your arms up to him. He laughed a little before he bent down to your level, allowing you to wrap your arms around the back of his neck, hands finding his hair as you pulled him into a soft kiss. He gently pulled away from you and tugged your towel off of your body before he pulled his own off of his waist and tossed both of them to the wayside as he immediately went back to your soft, waiting lips, his hands framing your face while he deepened the kiss.
You broke away for a breath, staying nose to nose with him. Quiet and softly, you spoke with your eyes closed as your foreheads touched, “You’re my first and last.” The sweet reminder of the fact that Nick indeed was your ‘first’, in a lot more than just sex, and that he would absolutely be your ‘last’ as well, seemed to only frenzy him as he returned his lips to yours hotly.
“Your one and only,” he snarled as you nodded against him.
“My one and only,” you repeated obediently.
Before you knew it, he had you on your back and moved you up the mattress, allowing him more room to kneel above you, only breaking the kiss to breathe. His hands were on your face and yours were in his hair as you continued to sensually make out. Soon, his hands began wandering your naked body and as he lowered himself and closed the space between you, you could feel his heavy cock, hard and hot against you. You spread your legs around him as he moved his lips down to your chest. You moaned at the feeling of him playing with your breasts. He was toying with your nipple in one hand as he took the other into his hot mouth. Suckling and nibbling, getting you more and more wet for him as he moved to deliver the same attention to your other breast. Leaving kisses and love bites all over your ample chest before moving back up and attacking your neck with the same need.
You knew he was trying to be gentle, working very hard to not go feral over you. You could feel it in his tense muscles, he was too stiff and you knew he was holding back for you. Trying to, at least. But when you felt him bite your shoulder a little too harshly as he grabbed your ass roughly, you knew what he really wanted, needed. Today was a bad day to say the least and you knew he needed to let it out. Normally he had no qualms about taking his frustrations out on you in bed but today was different. You were involved in this and he had already hurt you earlier, you were still fragile. He didn’t want to push you so he was trying to keep his aggressions at bay. But you didn’t want that. You wanted to feel him. Completely, with no inhibitions. You needed it.
Pulling his hair back just enough to get him to look up to you, you urged him closer as you kissed him hard before speaking.
“Nick, baby, I want you. Use me. Please. Don’t want you to hold back,”
“Princess,” he tried to caution, voice hard.
“Please,” you begged. “It’s okay, I’m okay. I want you to feel better. I want you, I just want you, please.”
He didn’t need much more persuasion as he crashed his lips into yours again. Your hands were on his back, holding him close to you, chest to chest, before he pulled away from your lips and pulled back. Your hands fell from his back and moved to his built chest, then up along his muscular shoulders as he stared down at you with dark, hungry eyes.
He pulled you up with him suddenly as he got off the bed completely. You stared at him confused for just a second before you realized what he wanted. Without him saying a word, you got up and bent over the side of the mattress, your ass sticking out as you stood there in anticipation of what was to come..
“Color?” he asked huskily.
“Green.” was your prompt response.
The first strike of his hand across your bottom stung in the most pleasant, familiar way. You moaned at the second one as he admired the jiggle of your ass, squeezing your flesh before he landed the next strike. He spanked you repeatedly as your skin grew hot, your eyes grew teary, and your pussy grew needier with each hit. You were a mess for him already.
As he grabbed at your ass and soothed your hot flesh, he couldn’t help but taunt you as he admired your slick pussy drooling for his attention.
“All this for me, princess?” he asked as his thick fingers swiped through your wet folds while you whimpered. He rubbed your wetness around as he continued playing with you before plunging one finger inside of you, curling against your tight walls.
“Yes, yes, Nick, all for you,” you moaned.
You could practically hear him smirking as he moved closer behind you. He pulled his finger out after pumping in and out of you teasingly. He pushed you further up the bed as he grabbed your ass again and spread your cheeks so much so that you opened up even more for him, you could feel your pussy spreading for him as he squeezed you and continued his playing. He slapped your ass once more and without warning thrust two of his fingers inside your wet and wanting cunt. You mewled in delight as he scissoed them inside you, preparing you for his cock. He loved playing with you, teasing you with pleasure and watching you writhe with desire for him to push you off of the edge. And he would, eventually, but he liked seeing just how far he could push and taunt you before you were crying for him. So he continued fingering and stimulating you just enough to keep you on the edge, but not enough to get you there. Not yet.
“Please,” you whimpered out with a breathy moan. He slid his fingers out of you at your pathetic plea and then leaned over your back, shoving his fingers past your lips into your mouth as he spoke in your ear.
“Suck,” he commanded, voice low and heady. You did as he said, sucking his fingers clean as he panted over you, and you could feel him grinding his cock against your ass. He pulled his fingers past your lips before he placed a sloppy kiss on your shoulder as he stood back up.
“Good girl,” he praised.
He grabbed his thick cock in his hand and decided to tease you a little more as he ran his tip up and down your slit. You were mewling at the sensation and wanted more.
“Your needy little pussy’s just crying for my cock, isn’t she?” he taunted, voice thick with desire.
“Mhm yes, Nick, please. Please fuck me. I need it, need you, need your cock inside me, please,” you whined desperately.
“Careful what you ask for, princess,” he said darkly before he positioned his cock up to your dripping hole. He thrust into you and began moving hard and fast as he fucked you without restraint. You were groaning and moaning as he hit deep inside of you, your legs dangling over the edge of the bed now with how far he pushed you up with his thrusts. His hand went to your hair and he pulled your head back harshly, loving the way your body reacted to him while he grunted in pleasure as you continued whimpering and babbling pure nonsense.
Letting go of your hair, his hands then gripped your soft, fleshy hips as he pulled you back onto his cock repeatedly, slamming in and out of you. The clap of his pelvis meeting the flesh of your ass while he continued pounding into you was salacious and lewd and served only to turn you on more.
“Fuck, you look so fucking pretty when you’re being spread open on my cock, angel. Feels so fucking good, fuck,” he grunted huskily, moaning at the feeling of you.
Your fingers were buried in the sheets as he fucked you further into the mattress and you were on the very brink of your orgasm. Nick was hitting so deep inside of you and you had never felt so full. Each slide of his cock against your walls brought you closer as he stimulated your g-spot with every thrust.
His right hand left your hip and slithered under you to where his index finger found your clit. He began rubbing the swollen nub in small circles, causing you to clench hard around him as he swiftly brought you to your orgasm with the added stimulation. You were moaning and crying breathlessly as you came, eyes squeezed shut as he rode you through your high and talked you through your orgasm.
“Ah, fuck, princess,” he moaned out. “You’re squeezing me so goddamn tight. Coming on my cock like a good girl, huh. You like that, yeah. Love when I split you open like this, don’t you. Love when I fuck your pretty little pussy, stuff you full of my cock while I play with your clit,” he spoke into your ear as he leaned over you again.
“Mmhm, I love it, ‘so good, it’s so good. Fuck,” you cried as you mewled into the sheet beneath you while he continued pounding in and out of your overworked cunt.
He took your hands in his, intertwining your fingers as he pulled your arms down and around your back, his hips snapping more erratically into you as he chased his high. He was leaning all of his weight onto you as he leaned over your body, pushing you further into the bed as he groaned. You knew he was close as he lost any of the restraint he may have had left, your name leaving his lips along with a string of curses.
“No one else could ever make you come undone like this. No one else will ever get to fuck you, feel your tight cunt wrapped around them. Fuck, this is goddamn heaven. And it’s all mine,” he said, moaning and grunting.
“You’re mine,” he growled into your ear. “And you’re gonna come again for me. Need to feel you come again, princess. Need to feel you grip my cock like that again.”
As if the never ending stimulation from his thick cock rocking into you from behind along with the thrilling sounds and praises you were pulling out of him weren’t enough to make you come again, those words absolutely were. Your toes were curling and the feeling of him on top of you - his pants and moans right in your ear as he leaned into you even more, all of it, every word, sound, and sensation were cascading at once into you and sent you headfirst into another orgasm, your hands squeezing his as he pushed into you further, your walls tightening around him again while he bit into your shoulder and you whimpered pathetically.
“I’m gonna come inside you, angel. Fill you up full of me, and you’re gonna take every last bit of my come, you hear me,” he panted through grit teeth in your ear. “You’re gonna be feeling me for days after tonight, princess. But that’s exactly what you wanted, isn’t it. Just can’t fucking get enough,” he growled before he pulled out of you. He flipped you onto your back so quickly you barely even registered it happened until he slammed right back into you, his hands keeping your thick thighs spread for him as he pulled you as close to him as he could, your ass on the very edge of the bed as he kept your legs open around his hips. He thrust a couple times more, long and hard, before he seated himself as far inside of you as he possibly could with the most beautiful moan you’d ever heard, his shuddering breaths falling on you as he started to let himself go inside of you, your pussy gripping him like a vice all the while. His hands were back on your hips as his body fell forward, his head nuzzling to the crook of your neck as he sucked air in through his teeth before letting out a deep, guttural groan, nearly shivering as he came harder inside of you. His thick ropes of come filling you. You held him close to you, petting his head as he leisurely pumped his cock inside of you a few more times, riding out his orgasm as you panted and mewled beneath him every time he stimulated your ever sensitive clit. When he was finished, you were sure you had never been so full. You could practically feel him leaking out of you.
You were both panting, regaining your breath, as he smiled against your skin, coming down from his high and nuzzling more into your neck as he readjusted the both of you to be more comfortable on the bed.
“You’re perfect, you know that? Every last thing about you,” he said as his arms went around the dip of your back, hands settling on your hips once again as he kissed your neck, up to your cheek, peppering kisses along your skin.
You smiled at his words and the feeling of his soft lips trailing along your tender flesh as tingles ran through you, wrapping your arms around him. Briefly you heard his earlier words float through your head. You’d never known him to be so…mean. To you, at least. Though you wanted to forget it, it continued nagging at you while he laid in your arms.
As he slowly pulled out of you and got off the bed, you pondered talking to him about it. You didn’t want to upset him, but this was gonna bug you if you didn’t voice it.
He was back in front of you with a damp rag and the most loving look in his eyes. Gently, he cleaned his spend from between your legs and after discarding the rag, crawled on top of you, engulfing you in his arms, pulling you into his side as you were cuddling with him.
“Nick,” you muttered softly. He hummed in response, waiting for you to continue.
“I just wanted to ask, to know..Earlier, you… do you, you really think that? That I’m stupid?” you asked quietly, your embarrassment and hurt evident as you tried to hide your face against him.
“Oh, sweetheart,” he gently pulled you back to look at him, his eyes full of sympathy, a stark contrast to the cold fire that raged there previously. “No, I don’t think you’re stupid.”
“Really?” you pressed.
“Really,” he nodded. “You’re not stupid, you’re naive,” he stated matter of factly.
You looked down, wincing slightly as you pulled away from him. Tried to, at least. Nick was quick to pull you back to him, tilting your chin up as he forced you to make eye contact.
“Hey,” he breathed, “that’s not necessarily a bad thing. You may be naive but no one's gonna take advantage of that or use it against you, I’ll always be right here looking out for you. Protecting you.” He placed a soft kiss on your lips as you allowed yourself to settle next to him again.
“And I love that about you,” he smiled. “It’s just natural for you to be sweet.. and trusting.. and kind,” he punctuated each word with a gentle kiss to your temple, cheek, and finally your soft lips once again after nuzzling your nose. “I’m so lucky I found you before the world could change any of that.” Those words, sickly sweet and full of love and admiration of you, that was your Nick. The way he behaved earlier was intense and unlike anything you’d received from him before. You were just glad he was back now, and eager to forget the hurt he caused you. Certain he wouldn’t do anything like it again to you.
You half smiled before sucking your lip, your mind returning to the current conversation you were having with him, “Certainly tried to.”
You thought back to just a couple years ago, before you met Nick, before everything changed. You were making minimum wage, working two jobs in the city, living in a shitty apartment with a roommate you barely knew. Life had never been easy on you. But the moment Nick came into yours, it was like he just made everything better. He took care of you like no one ever had. Showed you love like you’d never known. You felt like you owed him everything. You really would do anything for him, he was your whole world now. That’s why it hurt so badly when he insisted you were lying to him earlier. You thought you had made it clear that that was something you would never do to him. You loved him so much. You figurned you just needed to show it more. To do anything and everything you could to reinforce the simple fact that you were his and his alone. Forever. It was the least you could do, right? He gave you everything, and made sure you were aware of the fact that he’d do anything for you, he’d protect you and love you with all he had. You needed to ensure he knew, without a single doubt in his mind, that you’d do the same. Because you really would, you did. He never made you question for even a second his devotion to you. He always said how lucky he was to have found you, but you felt even luckier for it. Truly, where would you be without him? You didn’t want to even think about it. It was all too much to put into words at the moment. For now though, exhausted and worn from the tumultuous events of the day, laying next to him, his protective hold on you as you were cuddling into his warmth and feeling surrounded by the love you shared, it was enough.
“I’m so grateful for you,” you sighed.
He caressed your cheek as he smiled at you, admiring your delicacy. He knew you were perfect for him the moment he had first laid eyes on you. He knew you were meant to be his, and so he made sure that you were and you always would be.
“I love you,” he kissed you once more as your eyes threatened to shut, lashes fluttering.
“I love you, more,” you whispered as you nuzzled further into him.
“You look exhausted,” he chuckled softly. “Go to sleep, angel.”
He was right, you were completely drained, but still, you wanted to fight your sleep a little longer. You worried your dreams would be flooded with nightmares of dangerous men breaking into your home, trying to hurt you, trying to hurt Nick, and god, the sound of the pistol firing ringing in the back of your mind. You shook your head, hoping to shake the sound as well. A man died today. And that could have been Nick. That thought wrecked you. You didn’t want to be without him for even a moment, not even in your sleep.
“I will,” you mumbled, holding onto him.
“I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere,” he said as if he could read your mind, rubbing your arm soothingly. You needed to come back to yourself. You were only working yourself up to dwell on things you couldn’t change or control. And with Nick around, you didn’t need to worry about anything, he’d take care of it all. He’d keep you both safe..he’d always keep you safe. Finally allowing yourself to really settle while Nick held you, you were soon sleeping, and though you woke up every now and again with a start, Nick was always still right beside you. His touch calming as he’d lull you back to sleep. He was here and you were safe, he’d remind you, mumbling words of comfort against your temple until you fell asleep again. He stayed up all night just making sure you were okay. He said he’d take care of you and he meant it. He’d be damned if you ever had to go through anything like tonight again, but right now he just needed to be sure you were okay and slept through the night. He already had his guys tracking down their headquarters and first thing tomorrow, he'd be sure the people who were responsible for tonight would be deeply regretting getting anywhere near you and ensuring they’d never have the chance again. And after that, he’d finally tell you the big news. You two were going off the grid, somewhere remote where it could be just the two of you, like it should be. Somewhere safe, where no one could find you. He’d had the plans set for a while now, and it was the perfect time to do it. You were more dependent on him, he was sure you’d say yes without him having to convince or force you to. The ring was perfect and he couldn’t wait to slip it on your finger. He wasn’t sure you’d be ready for another big move, but the honeymoon would be the perfect cover to get you there without you worrying. You’d say ‘I do’ and it would all work out. He’d be your first, your last, your only, just like he was meant to be. Always and forever. Just you and him.
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moneymasnn · 2 years
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The holiday fling| Mason Mount Part 1/2
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Notes: To start this off THERE WILL BE A PART TWO!! lol it will be posted on Saturday, so only two days! This has been sat in the drafts for so long until I though it was good enough to post lmao. I hope you all enjoy the fic, I haven't written in literal months, but I'm really happy to be back on mason Tumblr again!!! Ive missed u all, thank you for all the kind messages I love every single one of you! And also I wanna say another thank you for 1k!!! When I saw it I was so shocked I honestly cried lol... but anyways enjoy the fic my lovelies🤍 gif credits too @goalkepa
Blurb: One where y/n meets a stranger outside of a bar and they both decide to be someone else for the night, until this backfires on them.
Warnings: Just mild swearing!
The request
Fancy holidays weren't your thing. You didn't really fit in with what people call the ‘riches’. The constant cameras, lack of privacy. It was honestly the last thing you ever wanted to experience. But with your brother in constant limelight, you almost were forced into that way of life.
You had just finished your degree in journalism in London, and right now was a better time than ever to have a well deserved break. 
Your brother had willingly been on the other end of all of the phone calls you had made. Crying in your university's toilets, telling him you were homesick and couldn't deal with the stress. 
You loved your brother, and you knew he only ever wanted the best for you. But what you needed was words of encouragement, not “drop out and come say with me.”
Now, to anyone, yes I get it. That does sound like the life, am I right?
Traveling around with your brother, he's a F1 racer, so the traveling would be set to a maximum, amazing views, beautiful cities, everything paid for. Yeah it was very appealing, but you weren't going to settle for that. You wanted to do it on your own.
So let's say hypothetically you did go travel the world with your brother, you wouldn't have anything for yourself other than following his career and you don't think you could deal with another phone call from your parents asking you what you were going to do with your life.
But now that you have finished university, you have some jobs on hold. But for the time being you decided to join your brother on his lads holiday to mykonos, fun. 
That's also how you ended up in the situation you were currently enduring. You and Lando had left the villa a while ago to go have some well needed drinks, and to celebrate the fact you actually managed to graduate.
But long story short, like everyone else in your life, Lando had brought up the dreaded question, “what are you doing with your life now you have finished uni?”
A question you couldn't exactly answer...yet.
“All i'm saying is-” 
“I get what you're saying, lando, but I want to do something for myself.” You couldn't help but let out a sigh of desperation, fiddling with the black straw in your drink.
“I could get you a job with mclaren? You could be an interviewer or something, and on the plus side you'll be with me for a year, traveling the world.” He smirks at you, bumping your shoulder.
He would love that, for him to be the hero. He's had everything handed to him on a silver plate, and you hated that. For once in your life you just wanted to be your own person.
“Oh because mum and dad would love that.” You mumble rolling your eyes.
“I'm sure they would, finally being able to see their child with a stable job, and maybe a stable life.” He snaps back at you.
You let out a breathy laugh. You might not be stable, but who is after they've just finished uni?
“You're being unreasonable? I don't want to live in your shadow, lando.”
“And you're being ungrateful.”
His words hit hard. You hated passing up his incredible opportunity, but you just wished he understood why you were doing it.
“I'm not being ungrateful, but you making one or two phone calls to get me this job defeats the point of what I'm trying to tell you. I want to get a good job because I'm talented and smart, not because Lando Norris is my brother.”
You watch as Lando rolls his eyes at you before he waved over the bartender to probably order another drink in hopes it kills the tension.
A silence loomed as you sat back in your chair, playing with the rings on your fingers.
The thing is, he doesn't get it. You love that he wants to help, but he needs to let you figure things out on your own.
You watch as some of landos friends start to approach him from the entrance,all dressed in fancy over-priced shirts, crisp white shoes and embarrassingly sunglasses on in the club. 
You eye up the men that only acknowledge your brother, ignoring your presence completely, and you suddenly think that going for a walk and getting drunk by the beach sounds like a good idea.
Lando wasn't paying any attention to you as his back was now turned, greeting the young boys that had just walked over.
You grab your drink, smiling at the bartender before swiftly getting out your chair and walking out of the bar, leaving Lando with his friends. He was too distracted to notice you had gone anyway.
You really should keep your head up when you're walking, fiddling with the black straw in your drink, it becomes a slight distraction as you go to make it to the exit door. Although, for you it wasn't only the cold mykonos air that hit your body.
Your body collided with another that was also trying to make it out of the door, you smiled up at the young boy, he looked about in his twenties, gorgeous brown eyes, eyes that complemented his dark brown hair and his short, stubbley, beard.
“Sorry, you go.” he said. 
“No, it's fine you go.” You ushered him with a quick smile.
“No honestly, you can go first.”
Your eyes narrow at the man, he swiftly smirks, scratching the back of his neck as you take up his offer and walk through the door first, smiling as you soak up the warm fresh air from outside.
“Sorry, about that.” he catches up to you, deciding to stand next to you. 
It took you a moment to catch what he was on about but then you realized that your drink had split when he bumped into you, luckily missing your outfit, but your toes looked kinda sticky.
“Wait here?”
“What?” You look up at the odd stranger in disbelief, before he takes the now empty drink from your hand, pointing to the concrete slab that was made to look like a bench by the door.
“Just sit and wait, please.” Honestly, your day had been awful, and I don't think Satan could say no to his eyes.
He goes to push the door to the club before he turns around again, “Vodka lemonade?” You silently nodded before he wisped around the door.
You stood for a second before deciding to actually sit and wait.
The back of your legs hit the cold concrete slab as you sat, crossing your legs staring at the palm tree that calmly swayed above you.
You didn't have a moment to contemplate what the hell just happened with the stranger when your phone dings in your pocket.
Lando
Where did you go? Sent 22:15
Y/n???????? Sent 22:16
Did you go back to the villa? Sent 22:17
I'm sorry if i've upset you i was just trying to help Sent 22:17
Y/n
I'm fine, don't worry. Gone back to the villa i wasn't feeling too good talk 2 u tomo. Sent 22:20
Lando 
Get back safe x sent 22:20
You couldn't help but roll your eyes, but you knew you needed to get out of here in case Lando notices you haven't actually gone back to the villa, but your trail of thought crashed when an almost familiar body was lingering over you.
It was the guy from earlier.
But this time he was holding a black round tray with a set of drinks on it, a wide grin plastered on his face as he placed the tray down next to you with what looked like two vodka lemonades, and two shots of tequila.
“Drink?” He asks you with a smile. “The least I can do after I practically spilled yours.”
“How do I know you won't spike me?” You squint at him, he didn't seem like the type to be honest, but what do you know, he's a stranger.
He furrows his brows before placing a hand on his heart, before smirking and picking up one of the drinks, he sips from the straw, before taking a dramatic gulp. He lets out a breathy laugh before passing the glass to you.
You tried not to giggle at the stranger's antics, but the couple drinks you had with Lando earlier were already doing you dirty as you quietly slipped the drink the stranger had bought you.
“Also the ice is floating.” He added, taking a sip of his own vodka lemonade.
“What?” 
You turned to face him, his cheeks tint a pink shade before he pointed to your glass, “When a drinks been spiked the ice usually sinks.”
You stare at your floating ice for a moment, if he is a serial killer he's pretty damn good at luring in his victims, because it's been roughly six minutes and this boy has you captivated.
“So what's your name?” he smiles, passing you a shot.
The smell of strong tequila invades your nose as you watch him lift up his shot to cling it with yours.
He can sense your closed off demeanor as he sighs, but his smile never fades, “Fine, okay then, maya.” He winks at you with his shot in the air as you copy his actions in swallowing the tequila, the sensation burning your throat.
You winced slightly at the taste, before slamming the shot back down on the tray.
“Maya?” You question him, wiping the dribble from your bottom lip.
“Maya… Everdeen? Yep, you definitely look like Maya Everdeen.” He nodded to himself as he placed his shot glass back on the tray.
“Been watching the hunger games have you?” You smirked at him, picking your drink back up to fiddle with the straw.
He smiled before his cheeks turned pink again, he was kinda cute when he blushed.
“Hmh, if we're being serious, you definitely look like a charles.” You added, gazing over his long brown hair and his gorgeously glossy brown eyes. Your gaze linkers around his neck for a little while, noticing the small chain loosely hanging down the tip of his chest.
“I don't think I grew up posh enough for my mum to call me charles.” He smiled down at you.
“Where did you grow up?” Your eyes were watching your floating ice, as he giggled at your question.
“Trying to get to know your victims?” 
“Simply making conversation.” The corners of your mouth slightly moved upwards.
“Portsmouth.” He replied, he did have a south east england kinda accent. “You?”
“Bristol.”
“You don't have a bristolian accent though?” He questioned.
“I did a lot of traveling growing up, I live in London now so it's not like I'm around the accent a lot, it really pops out when i'm with my parents though.” You smile up at him, but when your eyes meet he was already looking at you, the silent moment of eye contact was cut off when your phone screen lit up.
Lando
Did you get back to the villa alright? Sent 22:41
Shit.
“Hey Charles, fancy getting out of here?” You quickly stand up, brushing off the dirt from the back of your thighs.
“Go where? Somewhere quiet so you can murder me, i dont think so.” He smiles, you roll your eyes at his attitude before looking at the glistening reflection from the moon on the sea.
“Exactly that, the beach will do perfectly.” You smile already making way to cross the road.
This was very out of character for you. You don't do one night stands, not that this was a one night stand, or even anything close, but you knew it wasn't the safest of situations to have put yourself in. And the fact your brother would be pissed if he could see what you were doing right now. 
You pulled your heels off on the side of the road, watching ‘charles’ pull off his socks and shoes as you both took a stroll along the beach.
You spent the long walk talking about everything and nothing, it was nice, talking to a stranger. You and the boy never once spoke about your own life or its problems. You just spoke about the world and had an odd conversation about planes. He told you about his fear of heights while you compared it to your fear of spiders. You spoke about the future and how one day he hopes to have a family, you couldn't say the same, sure you would love to have a family, but you wouldn't do that with just anyone. After the conversations died down, ‘charles’ had suggested a game he liked to call ‘rapid questions’.
“Summer or winter?” he asked you.
“Autumn.” You quickly say.
“Good answer.” He smirked as he looked down at you.
“Okay I have one, are you a cat or dog person?” You asked him.
“What do you think?”
“You look like a dog person.” You bump his shoulder, smiling up at him, watching how his eyes lightley shone from the reflection of the sea..
“Correct. One place in the world you would love to visit?” He asks you.
“New york. You?”
“Vegas.” He sheepishly smiles.
“Best present you've ever received?” You asked him, he smiled as he thought about his answer.
“Hmh, my great nan she knits jumpers for all the grandkids every year at christmas.”
“That's your best gift you've ever gotten?” You question him, trying to suppress your smile from his answer.
“It's the same routine every year, but the best part is the smile on her face when she sees you wear it on christmas day.”
“That's cute.” You bump his shoulder as you continue to walk along the sandy beach.
“What about you?”
“The best gift I've ever received… probably flowers.”
“Flowers?” 
“Yeah, I love getting fresh flowers.” You shrug.
There was something about you that the boy couldn't help but be captivated by, he wanted to walk along this beach all night and ask you questions.
“Something you hate?” You said, interrupting his thoughts.
“Losing.”
“Competitive are we?” You smirked at him, your eyebrow furred as you watched him scoff slightly.
“Very.” He winked.
“Not a sore loser are you?”
He laughs, “I try not to be.”
“What about you? what's something you hate.”
“Expectations.” You shrugged, facing forward as you threw your head back slightly, feeling the sea breeze on your neck.
He looked at you confused, you took note of the expression so you decided to elaborate on your answer.
“There's nothing worse when you try your hardest and someone still expects more of you.”
“Yeah, that sucks.” he smiled down at you, but his smile widened as he thought of another question.
“Favorite swear word?”
“Bolacks.” You said with a confidant smile.
“Really?” He laughs,
“It can mean so many different things, good food, it was the bollocks, just kicked you in the nuts, sorry about your bollocks?” The stranger couldn't help but laugh at your answer.
“Mines definitely bastard.” He said.
“Bastard?” You repeated back to him.
“No, you've got to say it with sass, like bastard.” 
You both walked along the sand for a while longer, giggling as you both kept repeating the word bastard.
Your empty glass was still clutched in your hand as you both continued to slowly walk, you had no idea how far you had both walked, but judging by the complaining from Charles it was probably quite far. 
You turned around at the noise of Charles groaning, he fumbled down on one of the sunbeds laying across it as he looked up at you.
“I don't really drink a lot, so I'm basically a light weight. I just need to sit down for a moment.” 
You can't help but giggle at him as he sprawls out along the sandy sunbed.
You situate yourself at the bottom of the sun bed, your eyes focused on the view of the sea and moon rather than the clearly drunk man whose head was now placed on your leg.
“Maya?”
“Yes charlie.”
“I thought my name was charles?” He smirked, his eyes never leaving yours.
“It is, but charlies a cute nickname.” You had to take a second to look away, even with the alcohol his stare was intense to you.
He turned his head so he could look into your eyes better. But you broke eye contact again by pulling out your phone, you checked the time and it was currently one am. You knew you should probably get back to the villa soon, really risking it with Lando going home and not finding you all tucked up in your room.
“Tell me about maya.”
You smiled down at the boy, fiddling with your fingers for a moment, as you leant forward, gently leaning on his thigh.
“Well for starters, she loves books. Oh, she's a dog person. Her favorite color changes every week.” You pause for a second to think about what else you could say, but your mystery man was just soaking it all up.
“And she can't tell you what her job is or she will get assassinated, and so will you.”
The stranger fake gasps at your words.
“Tell me more.” He sits up, cross legged as he faces you.
“Hmh, she works for the FBI.” Your heart melted at the boyish smile plastered on ‘Charles' face.
“I've already said too much.” You say dramatically, hiding your face on his leg before you look up again.
“What about you, what does Charlie do?”
“Okay, but you've got to promise not to tell.” You silently nodded before taking his pinky finger in yours, he leans forward to whisper in your ear.
“I'm spiderman.” He smirks.
You pull away and gasp slightly, trying to keep it serious before you burst out in giggles. 
“Why are you laughing?” He frowns at you, but you can see the smile behind his eyes.
“Shoot a web.” You demande though your laughs.
“I cant.”
“But your spiderman?” You whine at him.
Charles huffs as he sits up more, “It's the suit, it doesn't come out of me, duh.” 
Your initial thoughts to this man was that he looked kinda sporty, like an athlete, a little bit cocky too, but the more time you spend with him the more you realize he's a literal nerd.
Your heart swelled as you wanted to spend more time with him, but you knew you had to get back to the villa soon.
“Thank you for trusting me with your secret Charles, but duty calls, i've just been made aware of a threat against the queen, i have to leave mykonos as soon as i can.”
You sit up but the boy gently grazes your legs.
“Wait, Maya.”
You stand up in the sand, looking down at the boy, especially his hand that was clutched around your knee.
“Meet me again tomorrow, please.” You thought about it for a moment, you leave in two days, and his company had made you smile more in the last few hours than you have in months.
“I can't make any promises, the jet leaves in an hour.”
“Well, the queen can wait, she's about to kick the bucket anyway. Tomorrow, should we say six?” You can't help but laugh at his comment.
“Where?” You ask him, watching how he lets out a sigh of relief at your answer.
“The caster hotel.”
“I'll see what i can do, spiderman.”
“But you were fine this morning?” Lando questions as he follows you through the hallway.
“That's because I didn't feel sick this morning, and now I do.” You huff.
“Why don't you want to come?” He leans in the doorway to the room you were staying at, he knew you weren't ill, but he would never suspect you sneaking out to meet a man whose name you still don't know.
“I just don't.” You sat on the bed, your arms folded as your dressing gown was tightly wrapped around you, hiding the dress you had on underneath.
“Are you depressed?” He cocked his head to the side, a questionable look on his face.
“Lando, for fuck sake, i have a headach, and your making it worse!”
“You left the bar early yesterday y/n, and you don't want to come again today? After everything you've put me through, sorry that I'm worried about you.” His words hurt, but not as much as the time on your phone that read 5:46.
“You don't need to worry about me.” You mumbled.
“But I do, I'm your older brother?”
You sigh before raising your head to look at your brother. 
“I'm fine, just please let me have the night to myself.”
“No.”
It was times like this where you felt like just crying, crying until the floor swallowed you up. It was currently 6:22, you were sitting in bed with lando. You were both watching old love island episodes with some snacks that were left in the fridge. Lando canceled on his mates for dinner, meaning you couldn't sneak out and see charles. You were going home tomorrow, and the chances of bumping into your mystery man were slim, but you let it go. Guess it wasn't meant to be.
Part two will be posted on 16/7/22
278 notes · View notes
marshmellowtea · 8 months
Text
um. so. y'all are not going to believe this but i've had this goddamn fic finished for MONTHS but i fucking FORGOT??? IT WAS HERE??? IT'S JUST BEEN SITTING IN MY DRAFTS BECAUSE I FORGOR I HAD THIS BASICALLY FINISHED FIC JUST WAITING TO BE EDITED AND PUBLISHED HGKLDSJFLKSD 😭
ahem. anyway. sorry for yelling lmao. onto the actual fic summary—basically, i decided to write this silly little thing about human, arospec lila trying to talk about a newly formed crush with an aroacespec will. it's very silly and fluffy and writing it made me giggle a lot, don't expect much angst here, aside from like a sprinkling of it for flavor lmao. that being said, small warning for some toxic queerplatonic partner vibes between will and lila, but the vibe is still mostly lighthearted, it's not too heavy or extreme. also, they're working on it, okay :') they're teenagers who grew up in abusive/traumatizing environments (which isn't referenced in the fic but it definitely shapes the way i characterize them), they don't exactly know how to navigate a healthy relationship yet but they're trying goddammit dskjfkdsafj
.....uh, if it's not obvious, i don't remember how i do summaries on tumblr fics ngl. there'll probably be a cleaner one when this gets posted onto ao3 in a day or two, so watch out for that if you'd prefer to read this on there :P tbh depending on how tired i am when i get home from work i might just go ahead and post it on there later today anyway oops
anyway, onto the fic now, hope y'all enjoy! :)
William's curled up on his side, his upper body in Lila's lap and her hands kneading though his hair in a way that mostly feels good, when she suddenly asks the question.
"Is it called a crush because you want to crush them?"
If this were closer to the beginning of their friendship, when he wasn't already used to weird comments like these from her, William might've sat up in shock, giving her a wide eyed expression of surprise she loves to make fun of him for. This is far from the most outrageous thing she's ever said to him at this point, however, so instead, he just furrows his brow and shifts in her lap a little, not even bothering to open his eyes.
"Lila, what on earth are you talking about...?"
She's quiet for a moment, her hands pausing in his hair. He lets out a little whine at the loss of feeling, and she huffs softly before continuing, using a little bit more of her nails than she was before.
"Let's say...like...maybe there's this person someone thinks is...pretty," she says, the words awkward and stilted in a way he's never heard from her before. "And because they're so pretty, that person keeps...fantasizing about...squeezing them. In their arms. Or under them."
"Ew," he says on instinct, his fingers moving to fiddle with the black ring around the middle finger of his left hand. "Is this hypothetical person you, Lila?"
"No, dumbass!" she says, and, well, that almost sounds convincing. "I'm just...asking. For a friend."
"But I'm your only friend?" he asks, genuinely confused. His confusion then turns to pain, however, as she pulls on his hair—apparently she found that insulting. "Ow! Lila!"
"I have friends. Mainly friends you picked out for us—" and here, she huffs, sounding put upon about his choice in companionship, as though she has no choice in whether she hangs out with them too, "—but friends nonetheless."
...okay, admittedly, he understands where the offense came from now. But still, she claims that he's her only friend enough that of course he would make that assumption, and it's kind of not fair for her to punish him for words he's repeating from her. And also, he must reiterate, ow.
"Anyway, it's for a friend," she insists, sounding a bit wounded. "God. Don't be a smartass, Will, it's not flattering on you."
"I'm not trying to be a smartass, you're just—ugh, nevermind," he grumbles, letting his eyes flutter open and sulking at a vague point in the distance. His hand drifts toward the hem of her skirt, and he plays with it absently, rubbing his fingers over the soft fabric. "Putting all that aside, well...um, sorry to your friend, but I don't think I'm the right person to ask about that. I still don't really...understand all that stuff."
"Ugh, right, I forgot you were a fucking loser."
"I'm not a loser!" he protests, but he immediately feels childish for it. He flips onto his stomach to hide his face in her lap, and is instantly rewarded with one of her hands on the nape of his neck, a warm, comforting weight. "That stuff is just...really complicated..."
"Yeah, well, that's cuz you're a loser who's bad with people, it's okay to admit it."
There's a twinge of fondness to the insult, and despite himself, he finds himself smiling a little at her tone. Still, he decides to retaliate by lightly pinching her on the calf, just under the crook of her knee.
"Ow! Will!"
She then retaliates to him by pulling on his hair again, harder this time despite only using one hand this time. He lets out a sharp cry of pain and smacks her on the knee, pulling out of her lap briefly to escape her wrath. She drops her hands once he's fully off of her and sitting up on his knees, and he scowls at her unamusedly. She scowls back at him, the two of them staring at each other for a moment with equal mild annoyance.
Then, face unchanging, Lila pats her thigh, looking even more annoyed when he doesn't immediately lay back down. "Well?"
He huffs, but obliges, flopping back in her lap, this time on his back so he can continue to scowl at her. One of her hands returns to his hair, and the other one grabs one of his hands, though it feels less like she's just trying to hold his hand and more like she's trying to restrain him from pinching her again. Which, really, is super unfair, given that he only pinched her because she was being mean to him. And she pulled his hair first. And because she always does shit like that to him, and he deserves a chance to defend himself...
...but she is petting his hair in a way he likes again, and her face has softened a little, her lips now in that tiny but genuine sort of half smile he's only seen her use on him. He smiles back at her, wobbly and crooked but just as genuine, letting out a little laugh despite how genuinely annoyed he was moments prior.
"You're the worst," he says, and though he kind of means it he also says it with all the affection in the world. "I am sorry I can't answer your question, though."
"Hey, you also suck," Lila says back, but she coos it in the same tone you'd use on a mischievous kitten. "And it's fine, honestly. It wasn't a serious question, anyway. I was just wondering."
They fall quiet for a moment, and William's eyes fall to their enjoined hands, watching as Lila idly traces his fingers with her thumb. He's struck, then, with the oddest thought—that being, the thought that he does love her, in some weird way, despite the constant bickering and occasional minor physical attacks. That no matter how hard she makes it for him, he cares about her, and he wishes she would let him do that without constantly trying to fight on him on it. That he's glad she loves him too, in her own weird way, because he knows she does but he rarely gets to hear her say it out loud.
Not that he could ever say all that to her, of course. She'd probably just make fun of him.
Instead, he says, "If it is you with the crush...you know I'd be here to listen if you wanted to talk about it, right?"
He's fully prepared to let the conversation end there, but she surprises him by letting out a sigh and saying, "I don't even know if it is a crush."
He raises his eyebrows at that, trying not to get too excited at the information he was just given. She'd hate it if he said it out loud, but she's really easy to scare away on these rare moments where she's being open or vulnerable. "What do you mean?" he asks, trying not to let his voice soften too much.
She groans loudly at that, but she hasn't stopped talking, which, score. "I dunno, William, like...the crush question was kind of a joke? But it also kind of wasn't?"
"...elaborate?"
She groans louder, loud enough to startle him a little. She must feel him jump, because she gives his forehead a light pat before entangling her fingers back in his curls, the hair petting having mostly stopped now. "When I think about this person...I want to hold them as tight as possible and not let go. And squeeze their hand and just...hold it. And..." She grimaces, like it pains her to admit it. "And kiss them, maybe. On their stupid fucking face. Among...other things that I suppose I will graciously spare you."
She taps his ring as she says that, making him giggle. "Thank you. I appreciate that," he says, smiling broadly up at her for a moment, before his face falls back into an inquisitive frown. "Uh, but, Lila? I'm no expert, but that...kind of sounds like a crush? I think?"
Lila chews on her lip for a moment, as if considering what she's going to say next. When she finally speaks, William feels his heart cease to beat in his chest.
"I know, but like...a lot of that is stuff I want to do with you."
William feels his face grow hot, and he stammers, ice cold panic rushing through his veins. Yeah, he loves Lila, but it's not—it's not like that, he's not comfortable with—she knows he's not—
"Not the—not the sex stuff!" Lila says suddenly, giving him a harsh shake. "I didn't say I wanted to do all of that with you, take a fucking breath, Will!"
Oh, he did stop breathing for a second there, didn't he? He inhales deeply as she told him to, letting her lightly push him upright into a sitting position on the bed. He twists around a bit so the two of them are side by side, and she immediately tugs him closer until his head is on her shoulder, awkwardly patting his back in a way he thinks she thinks is comforting. It's a little much, honestly, given that his moment of panic really was just a moment—it was instant relief hearing that she wasn't into him in that way, and it was kind of silly for his brain to jump to that conclusion in the first place anyway since he mostly knows where they'd drawn the lines in their relationship, even if they've never properly talked about it—but he likes these rare occasions where she attempts to fuss over him, so he's not going to protest it. It's kind of sweet, really, even if it's obvious that she has no idea how to comfort another human being.
"Ugh," she says, sounding more embarrassed than exasperated. "Ugh, I said that in the stupidest way, sorry." Then, after a pause, she adds, "I mean...it's all just stupid, anyway."
"Aww, no it's not," William says gently, very comfortable in his place nestled against her side. "I guess I get what you mean though. I know I don't have a crush on you, but I like cuddling you and stuff. I'd also feel weird if I suddenly felt the same thing toward someone else but with...other stuff too."
"Yeah," Lila says, sounding mopey. Probably because she's moping, if he had to guess. "It's not just that, either, wanting to touch this person the way I touch you also feels...different. Different in a way that's hard to pin down." She grabs his hand, having lost it in the shuffle of him sitting up, and once again starts tracing his fingers, running her thumb from the back of his hand, over his knuckles, down to his fingernails. "Like when I do this, it's nice, but I don't do it and think about you as my boyfriend. That'd be disgusting."
William barks out a laugh at that. Technically, it could be an insult toward him, but... "I understand what you're getting at, yeah. I want to be close to you, but you're not, like, my girlfriend or anything, and I wouldn't really want you to be. You're just my friend, but, like...a friend I want to cuddle sometimes."
"Stop saying that we cuddle," Lila scoffs, but the usual harshness of her tone is still rather muted. "But...yeah. Exactly. It's different, and it's weird."
William hums sympathetically, giving her arm a light pat. "Yeah," he says quietly. "That does sound weird." Then, after a pause, "I'm sorry. I wish I could help you more."
Lila huffs, letting her cheek rest against his head. "I wish you could help me more too," she bemoans, interlocking their fingers and giving his hand a light squeeze. "But, whatever. Just talking about it was nice, so you're not completely useless..."
Once again, William just chuckles at that. He can hear the unsaid Thank you in her voice, and he appreciates it, even if he does wish she would just be straightforwardly nice to him sometimes. Hell, not even just to him, oftentimes he wishes she would be nice in general.
But...she's working on it. He thinks. There's been a notable difference in the way she speaks to Martha, Ellie, and Regina, anyway. She's still on guard around Jim and Mike, and god, he doesn't really know what her deal with Tanya is, but she's friendlier with those three, at least. And...she's been more gentle with him, too. At the very least there's been less pinching.
He's proud of her. Which is another thing he can't tell her if he doesn't want her to laugh in his face, but, hey. Maybe one of these days.
"...you wanna lay down now?"
Her question pulls him out of his introspection, and William hums in assent, finally pulling his head off of her shoulder. "Are we gonna take a nap now?" he asks, rubbing at his face absently. "I got pretty close to falling asleep before, well, you know."
She sniffs, pulling her legs up on the bed and stretching out behind him, her arms and legs reaching each end of the mattress before she rolls back onto her side and brings them back in again. "I mean, you can sleep if you want. I don't know if I will."
"You're not at all tired?" he asks, curling up on his side next to her. They're face to face, now, and he can see the exhaustion in her face, as well as the slight flush left over from their conversation.
"Not really," she sniffs. "I mean, I don't think I am enough to fall asleep. I just want to rest my eyes a little."
"Oh, okay," he says, scooting a little closer to her. "I might fall asleep. You didn't want to talk more, did you?"
Lila shakes her head rather than verbally answer, and William smiles to himself. She's probably going to fall asleep too, judging by the way she's gotten quieter, but even if she doesn't, he knows she'll let him sleep if he needs to. Unless something important happens. Or if she gets too bored, which is something important in Lila's eyes.
She kind of is the worst, but luckily for her, he kind of does love her.
He lets his eyes fall closed then, pressing further into her warmth until he's tucked up under her chin. She doesn't fight him on it, instead wrapping a loose arm over him, and he knows he's very close to drifting off when he hears her ask one last thing.
"You're really not going to ask who my hypothetical crush is on, are you?"
It's an interesting remark—it almost sounds like she's disappointed. Still, it's not interesting enough for him to open his eyes. "I kinda figured I wouldn't be able to get it out of you," he mumbles, his voice muffled by her collarbone. "Why?"
"...I dunno. I just thought you would ask," she says, starting to sound close to sleep herself.
"Did you want me too?"
"No." She says it too quickly. And then amends, "Maybe..."
He laughs sleepily, resting one curled up hand on the small of her waist, wanting to be closer, trying to absorb the warmth she's emanating—she's always run weirdly warm, while he runs weirdly cold. He tries not too think too hard about the way that makes them fit so well together. "Tell you what. When I wake up, I'll pester you about it as much as you want me to. Is that okay?"
"I didn't want you to pester me," she protests, scowl audible in her voice. "Just ask."
He laughs again, suddenly overwhelmed with a feeling of contentment. "'m gonna pester you so hard," he mumbles, picturing the dirty look he knows she's giving him despite his still closed eyes. "'m not gonna leave you alone until you give me answers. S'only fair."
"How's that fair?"
"I mean...you pester me when I try to keep secrets from you."
"I don't..." Lila protests, but she sounds amusingly unsure. "Besides, since when did you try to keep secrets from me anyway...?"
"Mm. I stopped tryin' cuz you'd always get them outta me."
"Well, that just sounds like your fault."
"...maybe you've got me there," he mumbles, chuckling softly. "I jus' think it's my turn to needle somethin' out of you this time, mmkay?"
"Yeah, well, good luck with that," Lila grumbles, making him giggle more.
The two of them then lapse into a comfortable silence, aside from their quiet breathing. William is just about asleep when he feels more than hears Lila murmur something against his hair.
"Love you, Will. No matter what happens."
He smiles widely at that. She must think he's asleep—rarely does she say that she loves him without him saying it first. Even then, he usually receives it with a (nonetheless fond) eye roll, so hearing it now sounding so genuine is a nice treat.
"Love you too, Lila," he mumbles back, his voice slurred from exhaustion. "Love you so so much."
Given the way she tenses, he was probably right in thinking that she thought he was asleep. Still, she doesn't respond with a protest or a quip like she normally does, whether because of her tiredness, or maybe she just wanted to let a nice moment linger for once. Either way, he'll count that as a win.
It doesn't take him long to drift off after that, the smile not leaving his face even as he sleeps.
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unpretty · 3 years
Text
astielle ch 28 spoiler ask dump~~
anonymous asked:
Tauril-form is puberty, because that's when his voice changes. Abysscale-form is college-age because that's when he goes to his first orgy.
anonymous asked:
You called Abysscale-form college-age (which does not preclude teenage sexscapades given the ages that go to college) and that tracks with how I think of Tauril-form as going through puberty (because of the voice-change). But if Tauril is the horny teenager that's kind of sad. Because as Minnow has pointed out many times That Dick Will Kill.
not each other, it won't!! although i imagine taurils sleeping with each other would have the bro-iest vibe. very bill and ted. taurils also have Options with people who aren't giant bull centaurs, it's just awkward is all. fortunately for everyone taurils are actually adults and are not full of hormones, they just have zero impulse control and when they like someone they want to impress them and spend time with them and it doesn't necessarily occur to them to get their dicks involved in the situation (karzarul's mind was elsewhere the first time he was a tauril)
anonymous asked:
When Violet said monsters make the best mercenaries and throw the best parties I didn't think about it, but the fact that all the impyrs came into being with swordsmanship skills equal to Lynette probably had something to do with the former. Even if ten isn't that many, THEY COME BACK. (Eventually. In, like, a month.) And the others probably learned from Lynette, even if they died. Lynette's unintentional teaching, back again.
they learned from the best murdering them repeatedly
anonymous asked:
When Ari is repopulating, and he skips Black Drakonis, he says "Makes sense." But he's surprised when Violet points out that Black Drakonis is missing, so it sounds like he at least had a theory/assumption at the time for why she was skipped, but it doesn't match with the new information.
he initially just assumed that black drakonis had managed to avoid being killed the whole time, which made sense because she's a big dragon and she can just fly away if someone is trying to murder her. but generally if a bigass monster is alive someone is going to see it, especially her, because she likes finding population centers to try to guard.
anonymous asked:
"It also occurred to him that trying to get Minnow to act like she lived in a society since they were young may have negatively impacted his sense of what constituted an acceptable thing to say to a person while his dick was out." Is just HILARIOUS.
anonymous asked:
Honestly I can relate to Leonas cause just last week I was like 'I keep falling asleep in class maybe I should develop a caffeine addiction' and one of my friends was like 'pls eat more food' so I started to actually have breakfast and an after work snack and I magically stopped falling asleep in class
anonymous asked:
Minnow's hips don't lie, but castle ruins are strangely deceptive.
everyone who wasn't following along when astielleblogging intersected with kink taxonomy hell is going to be so confused if/when minnow finally gets stuck somewhere
@9ofspades asked:
Ari is my favorite again and I want him to have actual eternity to be happy with his poly soulmate throuple together. And also his big monster family. Also I think he's wrong about what the core of the Heir and Hero are - both of them have, deep in the core of their souls, the fact that they are Monsterfuckers.
for the record i have a post in my drafts with all of your readalong asks and i still haven't decided what to do with them but i enjoyed them IMMENSELY
anonymous asked:
>looking for food >ask the cook if their food is earthy or wet >she doesn't understand >pull out illustrated diagram explaining what is earthy and what is wet >she laughs and says "it's good food sir" >buy some food >its wet
@ivylaughed asked:
I love the tumblr meme references in Astielle. The guards bringing their own knives; there being an infinite variety of brassica oleracea; the fucking chocolate guy. I'm half-waiting for a children's hospital/color theory reference. Thank you for the easter eggs.
i'm glad someone read 'chocolate birdhouse' and immediately thought THAT FUCKING CHOCOLATE GUY AGAIN ashjasd
anonymous asked:
I just wanted to say that as a plant nerd and forager I deeply appreciated Minnow's surprisingly accurate botany lesson.
unfortunately all the books that leonas gave minnow are still at her house and so she cannot cite sources for the existence of hemlock, queen anne's lace, and giant hogweed
anonymous asked:
“I think you overestimate people’s willingness to admit when things don’t make sense to them," lmao Minnow has a point
will the two men she is with learn from this and start admitting when they don't know things they think they should and are confused? absolutely not.
anonymous asked:
XD Ari hears "Kavid" and immediately attempts a strategic retreat.
anonymous asked:
“‘you should get dressed’ is a complete sentence.” Is making me laugh.
it's probably for the best because if he actually had known all three of them were out there it would have taken him like an hour to get ready and he would have had at least one breakdown about how none of his outfits were good enough and it was all nari's fault
anonymous asked:
Kavid: I will be happy to HAVE YOU ALL *lascivious eyebrow wiggle* at my earliest convenience.
anonymous asked:
"he gets smaller" "in this weather who doesn't?" KITTY PLZZZ
anonymous asked:
I can't decide whether I love or hate Kavid - I have a very Specific idea in mind for his voice, though I admittedly can't figure out where I'm pulling it from. He is an Excellent character though. Lovely chapter as always :D
anonymous asked:
Before, I was entertained by Kavid. Now I love him.
anonymous asked:
Kitty, Kraven and Kavid have similar speech patterns on purpose, right??? Right?????
i was honestly imagining some kind of nonsense faux-european what-country-is-this-even-from hollywood accent but imagining that he has sounded extremely russian this whole time is extremely funny
@rose-and-bones asked:
SHE HAS A TYPE aghfgstjs
minnow having a thing for obnoxiously pretty men who think they're great aka self-recognition through the other (horny)
@speakingintothevoid asked:
“You are,” Leonas said, “an egotistical, self-important fop.” “Ye-e-es,” Kavid said without shame. “She has a type, does Starlight.” I! LOVE!! IT!!! Makes me almost think of Violet and Karzarul - our point of view character being faced with a version of themselves who are more comfortable in their own skin and our boys not knowing why that annoys them
@keleviel asked:
I rescind my earlier mild disdain, Kavid is great. Is he actually The Greatest Of Bards, or is that just more showmanship?
he rocks about as hard as you can rock on a lyre, which is probably harder than you'd think (especially if you brought a lot of drummers) (which he does)
anonymous asked:
Jakshahshsh every time a new astielle chapter comes out i read it at least twice. Kavid i love you. Leonas i love you also you fucked up lil man. And karzarul the seat. And minnow the mischievous. and just. poor nari. existing in the same world as minnow and her all-powerful boyfriends and also kavid. nari needs a raise
she really does
anonymous asked:
Bruce in Office Meeting and Leonas grabbing the wine when Kavid starts talking about Imperials solidarity.
anonymous asked:
"You would like to compare notes?""Always." Brilliant. Leonas to a t. Loving this interlude with kavid. Snuggly tipsy leonas is a treat. kavids talk of how the weather makes all of us smaller had me cackling. Also this batshit imperial conspiracy is gr8
anonymous asked:
I am suddenly much less comfortable about Leonas performing medical experiments on Minnow, though no fault of his own. :(
@mooseman13579 asked:
Leonas finding out about the weird sun empire truther stuff: haha I'm in danger
the real unanswered question is how much of this is news and how much of it is stuff he already knew and assumed was normal
@thegayknee asked:
Holy shit this is it, isnt it. This is how they fix karzarul's reputation and expose Leland. With the power of Kavid
anonymous asked:
Karzarul's Questlog: "Work on our Image" updated, The Tale of Hollow Monsters delivered to bard.
anonymous asked:
just how many of her lovers is minnow going to recruit into her questing party
she should probably be swapping people out to keep their levels consistent but instead she just keeps karzarul and leonas as her companions for every single quest
@flying-butter asked:
"Details! I need details!" "The king sucks." This is every conversation with any of the trio. Minnow likely knows how to complete half of Ari's quests and Leonas the other half, but no one talks about anything without prompting.
minnow just assumes that everyone knows what she knows because she can't possibly be the brains of the operation and meanwhile karzarul and leonas are both busy having shame
anonymous asked:
i was so excited for the lore drop but the moment Leonas sat in Karzarul's lap my brain just shut off
@themaidenisdeath asked:
oh yes, as we all know, "all business" and "taciturn" are the first words that come to mind when we think of Minnow. It reminded me of when she met Karzarul and he told her she was particularly chatty for hero. Sorry Kavid, you're just neither a Sweet, Considerate Monster with a Dick of Steel And Tentacles To Match™ nor a Twink Prince With Silky Hair, Dom Tendencies And Weird Dietary Beliefs™
@halfdeadfriedrice asked:
"what Hero business?" / "I'm the Hero. All my business is Hero business." You tell em Minnow! And then it turns out to be Quest relevant after all; all business is Hero business Also kavid's last night's makeup and messy convertible couch covered in laundry with half-empty wine bottles on the floor is THEE most visually resonant, I feel like I am visiting a college friend
leonas got very lucky that there weren't any cigarette butts floating in that wine because in his mood he might have just drank it anyway
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marichat-verse · 3 years
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Mist Memories
Leo Valdez x reader for his birthday ahhhh (even though it's angsty) with a platonic/developing jason x reader cameo at the end (lmao im sorry i couldn't help myself 😭)
Based on this picture I found in pinterest + also [kinda] based on traitor by olivia rodrigo and omg i really recommend u guys listen to this edit because it reminds me so much of this fic that's been stuck in my head for MONTHS also kind of a run away with me prologue lol
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Your POV
I nervously made my way across the forest until I reached a limestone cliff. I knocked on the iron door, not really expecting to get an answer.
My boyfriend has been shutting himself in Bunker 9 for the past few weeks. I stood there counting up to seven before knocking again. I knocked again two more times, until he answered in the middle of my last knock.
He removed his goggles and winced as sunlight hit his eyes. He'd grown thinner and paler, making the dark circles in his eyes more pronounced.
"Oh, Leo..." I reached out to brush a few strands of hair away from his face, but he moved away.
"What are you doing here?" He said in a monotone voice.
I moved to walk inside the Bunker, brushing off his hesitation to let me in. "I'm your partner, remember? And I'm really concerned because you're shutting yourself out lately. You know everyone's starting to worry about you. Percy asked me to check on you because you missed pegasus riding with him. Oh, and I'm pretty sure Jason's coming back from Camp Jupiter soon. I was hoping you and Annabeth could be with Piper while Percy and I hung out with Jason because it's been a little awkward since their breakup. Plus Piper wanted to tell you something—"
"Please," he said forcefully causing me to stop and look at him. "Just... Get out."
Normally, he'd shut himself from the world for a few days to work on an important project or because he was feeling really sad and he needed space. But this was getting out of hand. He had never locked me out of his life when I offered to help him. He was never this mean when he asked for space. I was not having this attitude of his.
"Okay, Leo. I tried to play nice. What is so important that you blow off all your friends for nearly a month that you can't even tell your partner, or maybe say hi to your best friend who's coming back from the other side of the country?"
He didn't say anything. He pursed his lips and avoided eye contact. I scanned he room for any signs.
It was messier than usual with all the crumpled paper scattered on the floor, especially on his desk. He could have been drawing up new plans. Something in my gut told me that something wasn't right. There were no new unfinished projects, indicating that he wasn't starting a new invention. Harley's helicopter lay on his bench in the same state it was weeks ago. Huh, not even his siblings could enter the Bunker.
I turned and Leo was already changing Festus' oil. I took this moment of distraction to pick up a few pieces of crumpled paper on the floor and on his desk. I had to process the words a bit longer—too long that Leo took notice. Damn dyslexia.
I heard footsteps speed up behind me, but it was too late. I read enough and got the gist of what he had been trying to do these past few weeks.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" He yelled at me. Small embers started to erupt between his curls.
I laughed dryly. "So this is what you've been up to?"
His fists tightened, further crumpling the paper in his hands. His eyes flashed with anger, despair and confusion.
I sighed and focused my eyes on his desk, not daring to look at him any longer. Under some pieces of paper were old photographs of him and Piper from Wilderness School. Yup, those definitely were the mist memories she had with Jason. I read the latest draft he'd been writing:
Dear Piper,
Remember the mist memories from boarding school with Jason? They were real, but they were with me.
I miss you. I miss when it was just us. I miss the night on the roof.
Yours truly,
Leo Valdez
I tried to keep my voice from cracking. "How long?"
I heard him sigh. "Three weeks."
I balled my fists. Tears started to fall and smudge the ink. I wiped them away as fast as they came.
"How?"
"In a dream," his tone softened now. "Hera came to me in a dream and told me to check an old drawer in Bunker 9. I found the photos and the memories came rushing back."
"How long were you dating back then?"
"Two weeks."
"Were you ever going to tell me?"
Silence; then a deep breath.
"No."
I shook my head in disbelief. "Why?"
"Because I knew you'd get upset like—"
"I meant why would you throw away months of our relationship for a couple of weeks of your relationship with her? And without even bothering to tell me? Gods damn it, Leo. We've been together since you've first arrived at camp. And what about those promises you made when we were sailing to Greece? You've been keeping these feelings away from me and you've been lying to me, making me believe that there's still something between us and—"
"Oh, calm down," he said with an annoyed expression and tone, which only infuriated me more, "it's not like I did anything were her yet! I didn't kiss her or tell her how I truly felt for her! She just got out of a relationship with Jason around the same time I had that dream. I had to figure out how to talk to her about it. I've been alone in this Bunker for three. Fucking. Weeks. I didn't cheat on you."
"Oh, and that makes everything better?" I countered. "Being in a relationship isn't about not cheating, Leo. It's about being honest and communicating with each other."
"Oh, like you've been communicating with me? After the war, you take go back to Manhattan for school, and you take a job. I haven't seen you much during the holidays because work has been keeping you in the city. And you won't tell me what you even do for a living!"
I took in a deep breath. "I told you I needed to have a life outside of camp! I needed to know first that I could handle myself in the mortal world as a normal human being. I needed this demigod part of my life to be separate as much as possible! I've been in two wars, Leo. I needed time to myself, too. And I was about to tell you guys in a few more days. But I guess now, I'm glad I've kept you out of that part of my life. At least I have an escape from all of this. And now, especially from you."
I took another deep breath and walked to the door, about to let myself out. I turned back again, both our tear-stained eyes meeting each other.
"If it makes you feel any better," I said softly, "I would've hated the idea of us breaking up. But if you really love her, if you really feel like you have this special connection to her and she makes you happy, then I won't get in your way. You could at least have had the decency to talk to me so we could have left on a good note."
He looked at me with wide eyes, clearly regretting his actions. I sighed and looked around the Bunker, possibly for the last time. Lots of memories were definitely created in this room; all just as grand and meaningful as the inventions they made here. But just like some of Hephaestus' contraptions, some of them were flawed and dumped in his scrapyard, no matter how much potential it could have had.
"Goodbye, Leo."
I sat on a rock on the beach that gave me a beautiful view of Long Island Sound. To my left, the sun started to set, casting an orange filter on everything. My heart broke, remembering how everything glowed orange in the Bunker. Leo always left the fires burning when he was working. The sunlight twinkling against the sea reminded me of how small bits of flame peaked through his hair earlier. I remembered how mad he was at me. Or maybe he was mostly mad at himself.
"Hey."
I jumped when someone sat—or rather, landed—beside me. I turned and smiled, seeing one of my good friends back at camp.
"Hey, you're back," I said weakly. "How long have you been here?"
He smiled at me, although he could maybe sense that something was wrong. "Half an hour, maybe? I saw Annabeth making plans to expand camp to have a city. She made me do an aerial inspection and I told her I'll get back to her tonight. That's when I saw you."
"Mhmm," I mumbled, not really knowing what to say. It was silent for a few minutes before I spoke up again, knowing he was just waiting for me to open up.
"I broke up with Leo."
His head quickly turned to me. I guess he wasn't expecting it to be that bad. "What?"
"Oh yeah," I laughed dryly. "Turns out the mist memories Piper had in Wilderness School with you? They were real. But not with you."
His eyes widened. "Oh... With Leo."
"He locked himself in the Bunker for weeks trying to write a letter. It was heartbreaking. Like, truly heartbreaking. He wanted to tell her how much he missed her and how much he missed them. Then he said how much he missed that night with her under the stars and... It hurt. Like hell."
"Oh," he said. "I guess Piper didn't tell me everything then."
"She knew all along?"
He shook his head. "Maybe not everything, but she told me she's been confused about her feelings lately and she'd been having visions or dreams of possible old memories that were messing with her head."
"I'm sorry about you and Piper," I said.
"Don't be," he said. "I understand her. It did hurt, though. But I think I can get over it some day. We're still awkward around each other, but at least we left on a good note."
I scoffed. "Leo couldn't even give me a good ending to our relationship."
"Hey," he said as he put a hand on my shoulder. "You're a great person, y/n. You've done so much, especially for him. It's his loss that he was stupid enough to let go of you."
"I know that."
"Do you really?"
"I do!" I said. "I'm a great person and I know that. But that doesn't mean what he did doesn't hurt me."
"I know," he said. "You'll find someone who'll treat you like the queen that you are. You're a great person, and I'm not just saying this to cheer you up. I truly think you're amazing."
I smiled at him. "Thanks, Jason. And you'll find someone great, too. Maybe not as great as me but, then again, who is?"
We both let out a laugh. The conch sounded in the distance, signaling dinner. I moved to stand up before hearing Jason speak up again.
"Hey, do you maybe want to just grab a couple of plates and eat out here?"
I smiled. "Yeah. That sounds good. I don't really want everyone else hounding me about the breakup right now."
I don't know how long it was going to take me to get over Leo. We really did gave something special. It was cruel how the universe gave me something so good, to make me have hope that something was finally going right, then have it yanked away from my arms just as suddenly as it came.
He never cheated on me, but that didn't mean he didn't betray every promise we made to each other. I should have known it was too good to be true. Life has always played cruel jokes on me.
Then again, who's to say that things won't turn out for the better, right?
•••
Tagging: @drvrslcense @bubblybubbubs @dreamerball @quteez @aesthetxcimagines @chasingpj @beingleft @wadewilsonsgreatestfriend
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dallonm-archive · 3 years
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[image description: a cropped picture of a leafy orange tree in front of a vibrant blue sky. across the photo, in a white serif font reads "CAMP NANO WRAP-UP" in all caps. /end id]
whoops did not plan to do a post like this but also did not plan to work on more than one project 🤸 i hit my goal much sooner than expected but i still wanted to ride the camp nano wave so i kinda just. wrote what i wanted as long as i wrote every day lmao. now I'm more focused on planning and researching than actually drafting so I figured I could wrap up the month now! I'm v happy with the progress I made. I'm only sharing three, but I got progress on four projects and a short story 🤩
LIFE CYCLE OF MASSIVE STARS ; 22,803 words ; yeah I definitely needed a break after writing like 20k in like 2 weeks LMAO BUT it's going well and I'm enjoying drafting the rest much slower! I love this book sm (Context on the excerpt: someone asked Tomas what his dream house would look like and he just described his childhood house but like specifically how he remembers it from his childhood because even if he can go back to the house he can never go back to the home </3)
Fireworks shatter behind your heads. Streetlights drip onto pavement puddles. You don’t have an answer ready. “I think it’d be very rustic. Cosy, you know? Big windows with big windowsills you can sit on.” The house in your head is alive but hazy, images blended like a bleeding watercolour painting. “There’d be a big garden, but because it’s in the countryside it feels even bigger. Like it’s not in the middle of nowhere, but it’s quiet. Like you can hear the air in the morning.” When you speak, it’s 2004. Seven years old. The sleepy drawl of morning radio. Dad’s botanical office, watering plants with your elephant-shaped can whilst he lists their names. “I want loads of plants too. Monstera, dracaena, spider plant, ivy…realistically they’d be a nightmare to keep alive but like you said, this is a dream.” When you speak, it’s 2018. Twenty-one years old. Sat on a brick wall in front of houses whose windows bleed amber. One of them has a star ornament hung on the window. Another already has their Christmas tree up. If you gaze hard enough, you can draw out the silhouettes of people that move and speak and breathe and live in houses in the Netherlands and not England. “Yeah, a cosy house. One with lots of memories.” You smile at your silhouettes, you pretend they have faces to smile back.
Also Tomas came out as being on the aromantic spectrum last week everyone say congratulations Tomas :)
REVELATIONS, REVELATIONS ; 7,142 words ; I keep thinking I know this book and then it keeps punching me in the jaw. Had some plot revelations (aha) that I am both excited for and terrified of :) anyway here's Felix at a party he def doesn't want to be at (cw for alcohol and implied sex and drug use, nothing explicit)
The party is a feeble attempt to razzmatazz 1986 into something bigger than it was. Madonna’s album from summer whirls across the apartment. Groups of strangers with alcohol-flushed faces laugh too loud. Terry from Apartment 5 shoves through the door with a champagne bottle in each hand and Margot from Apartment 7 pours too much vodka into her Blue Lagoon. Cheap coloured lights soak the room in purple. Red solo cups discarded on the coffee table. The air fuzzy and neon. A man with a beer-stained shirt and pupils like Magic 8 Balls informs Felix that he and his boyfriend are looking for a third. Felix politely declines.
and here's a soft sapphic kiss with concerning undertones :)
Tonight her lips don’t taste like Jolie, they taste like her blood. But Dorothy has kissed Jolie so many times she’s not sure what “Jolie” tastes like anymore: sometimes it’s drugstore lipstick, sometimes it’s cherry cola, beer, bubble-gum, tobacco. Sometimes it’s sunlight, rain, fog. Tonight it’s blood, and the taste sticks to her tongue. Cars hum outside. The unshaded lightbulb casts them in a dull halo.
MADE OF INDIGO ; a novel idea that recently ambushed me and now I'm hooked. It's too early to properly introduce but: trans mlm romance! Road trip! Fleet Foxes vibe! :) the mental impact of unsupportive families and systematic transphobia :( anyway I've known Cyrus for like a week and I would die and kill for him. I'm not drafting yet, just playing with prose!
Cyrus has bulb-shaped fairy lights across his desk that flicker like the wings of a dying moth, but he keeps them up because he likes how they look in the sunlight. Cyrus sneaks cake batter and says he didn’t even though it kisses the corners of his lips. Cyrus fiddles with his beaded bracelet when he’s nervous. Cyrus has a moon-shaped reading lamp that he forgets to turn off. Cyrus will wake with dawn even if he falls asleep at two, three, four in the morning. Cyrus’ favourite colour is turquoise and his favourite flavour is cherry and his favourite season is summer and his favourite planet is Neptune. Cyrus says he doesn’t understand poetry but when I asked him why he chose his name he said he wanted to pocket a trace of sunlight even after the day is swallowed by the night.
since i didn't do a camp nano taglist i'll just torment the general one! ask to be added or removed;
@kowlazovdi @avi-burton-writing @ryns-ramblings @kitblogsthings @ezrathings @aetherwrites @radiomacbeth @bijouxs @bookphobe @haldimilks @alicewestwater @bookpacking @shaelinwrites @onlyganymede @theelectricfactory @write-like-babs @oceancold @veiliza @sidhewrites @wolf-oak @oasis-of-you @coffeeandcalligraphy @cecilsstorycorner @howdywrites @keira-is-writing @flip-phones
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hiddennerdworld · 3 years
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When You’re Close to Me w/ Katsuki Bakugou
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Warnings: some tears from characters, but still just a bunch of fluff
A/N: I love this song so much. (Go listen to it now). I feel like I didn’t do it justice but whatever. This has been in my drafts forever. Idk how it turned out but here we go. Also ik it’s kinda long, don’t come after me lmao
Are you here with me? Just looking out on the day of another dream
Bakugou just started to stir awake, the sun slowly starting to beam in the window. His blurry vision came to focus on the digital clock next to him that said 5:45 AM. He sighed and flopped his spiky head back onto his pillow. He opened his eyes again slightly as he turned to face his partner next to him. God, he still can’t believe how lucky he is. Every morning he gets a little wave of relief when he sees you by his side. He’s got a little smile on his face as he holds back from just cupping your cheek and pecking you on the forehead to tell you how much he loves you. But he thinks you’re so cute and peaceful when you sleep and knows you need rest otherwise you’ll be a little brat. Instead he wraps his arm around you, closes his eyes, and hopes he falls back asleep as his mind still focuses on you.
Well, you can’t get what you want, but you can get me. So let’s set out to sea.
“Fuck, I’m so sorry, baby. I couldn’t get out of it. They needed all the help they could get.” Bakugou pleaded to you while holding your hands in his. It was your 3 year anniversary and he had to cancel your plans for the evening due to a villain attack downtown.
You sniffled and looked towards the ground, limply holding his hands back. “I understand. I knew what this was going to be like, being with a hero. It’s just hard sometimes you know? I miss the days where we would spend all day together. We would go to class together, eat lunch together, visit each other’s dorms whenever we wanted. I miss you, Katsuki.”
He pulled you into a hug where he ran his hand through your hair as you buried your face into his chest. “I know. I miss you so much. Being a hero is amazing, but it’s damn exhausting, especially not having you there with me. I love you, Y/N.” He said softly as he kissed the top of your head and then rested his chin on it.
“I love you too, ‘Suki. We’ll figure things out.”
“Of course, we will. We always do. You and I are a pretty kickass team if I do say so myself.”
“Huh, you really think so?” You looked up to meet his gaze. He just nodded and hummed in reply. “Well, I do too.” You then pulled him into a sweet kiss. Something you guys had done a thousand times, but it still brought butterflies to your stomach every time. You guys remained in each other’s arms for a bit longer, just swaying slightly despite the quiet.
“You know, I may have a way to bring back the old days.” Bakugou said breaking the silence.
You looked up at him. “Oh yea? Do tell, pretty boy.”
“Well..” he cleared his throat and continued in a low tone, “I was thinking maybe we could move in together. Like when we lived in the dorms, but with no Aizawa on our backs. It’s not perfect but at least I’ll get to see my beautiful idiot more often” You thought for a few seconds just staring into space. “Nevermind, it was stu-“.
“It’s perfect.” You kissed him again. “I would love that, babe.”
“Tch- well yea, of course you would it was a great idea.” He said with a shit-eating grin on his face after getting an ego boost from you agreeing with him. You just rolled your eyes back. “I would too, though.”
Cause you are my medicine when you’re close to me. When you’re close to me
Katsuki had no idea where he was. He was lying down on a bed, staring at the stark white ceiling as his vision began to clear. When he finally regained consciousness, he jolted up realizing he didn’t know was was going on. Then, you got up from your chair that was beside him in order to calm him down. He suddenly felt a sharp pain on his side. He winced and quickly put his hand on the wound.
“Oof, honey. I was trying to prevent you from doing that. Are you okay?” You said as you softly rubbed his arm.
He listened and lied back facing toward you this time. In a low, gruff voice he responded, “Yeah, I’m fine. Where the hell are we?”
“We’re in Recovery Girl’s office. After training today you ended up getting pretty beat up and passing out.”
It was all coming back to him. It was him versus Deku. One of their last days at UA and everyone was going all out. The two were moving quickly, jumping around each other trying to dodge and land hits. Eventually they started to wear down, but you know them, they will never stop. So after a while, Midoriya was able to use a little more than 10% of One for All, causing Bakugou to crash into a wall and fall to the ground. It wasn’t over yet though. He stumbled back up while doing his signature yelling. He was setting off explosions to fly up to his opponent and land a huge hit, but midway he just passed out and ended up falling on the concrete.
“Oh, yea I remember now. THAT FUCKING DEKU!! I’M GONNA MAKE HIM PAY!!” He yelled while trying to get out of bed. You then had to get up and set him back down.
“No, no, no. Katsuki, you can’t do anything right now. You need to just relax.” You said softly while pushing him back down by his shoulders.
“But I can’t lose to him! No fucking way!” He was still attempting to get up.
“You have to let it go, Suki.” You sat back down next to him and held his hands in yours. “I understand you wanting to get even, but you can’t right now. You’ve already gone way too far today.” You take a deep breath and continue, “You’ve been worrying me. Recently you’ve exhausted yourself so many times just in training alone. I get we’re close to graduating, but you need to relax, take it easy. Exerting so much energy in an emergency, I understand, but you’re just fighting ‘stupid’ Deku. You’re not going to be doing much hero work if you’re always in the hospital.” You sighed and put your head down, “I’m sorry, Suki. I just hate seeing you hurt.”
He knew what you meant. A couple months ago you were also injured badly and had to stay in the hospital for a few days after fighting a tough villain during your internship. He could barely take it. He couldn’t do anything except be by your side. All he wanted was to see you back to being the badass you usually are.
He sat up and rubbed his thumbs on your knuckles as you continued to hold hands. “Don’t worry about me, dumbass,” he said at almost a whisper, showing how ‘dumbass’ is just his way of saying he loves you. “I can take care of myself just fine…. But as much as I hate to admit it, I know you’re right.” He said with a smug grin which didn’t go away after you hit his shoulder. “Jeez, babe I’m just kidding. Point is you’re right. I can’t just go in ready to kill some people. I need to be smart about it. I need to be able to prove myself.”
“But you already have proven yourself. In more ways than one. You can show how great you are using methods that aren’t beating the shit out of Izuku, you know?”
“But those ways aren’t as fun.” You ended up slapping him on the shoulder again as he almost died laughing.
“Can you just promise me that you won’t end up in the nurses office again?”
“Alright, I’ll try my best.” He pulled you over and gave you a kiss on the forehead, “Thanks for putting up with me. I love you.”
“I love you too, even though you give me migraines.”
And surprisingly Bakugou kept up his promise, saving himself a whole lot of pain and saving yourself a whole lot of stress.
Just looking out for the day when you’re close to me.
The heat was rising as the your second year of UA was coming to a close. For the last half of the year Bakugou was slowly accepting his feelings for you and couldn’t hold back any longer. Somehow he tolerated you more than all the other extras. Hell, he even liked spending time with you and would go out of his way to do so. He didn’t want to spend the summer without you, but he didn’t know how to approach the situation. He couldn’t risk looking soft, but then again he “doesn’t care” what other extras think. It was a position he’d never been in before and he didn’t know how to handle it.
You were in the same boat. You may have had crushes before, but not like this, and definitely not like Bakugou. It didn’t take much to notice that he was somewhat nicer to you. He did schoolwork with you and didn’t smack you upside the head. He started choosing you as his partner more often in training. And never exploded when he got he annoyed with you. Maybe he was just nice to you because you were nice to him? You didn’t want to take things the wrong way and upset him. He was so predictably unpredictable. A literal ticking bomb, but somehow he was a lovable one.
The two of you were becoming unbearable. Your friends had all been planning to get together before summer break anyway, so they decided to do some meddling.
You had just joined the Bakusquad in the common room waiting to have some fun. You and Bakugou were sitting next to each other on the couch while Sero, Kaminari, and Kirishima all were chilling on the floor around the coffee table. Meanwhile, Mina was nowhere to be found.
“Ugh! Where the hell is stupid Pinkie?! I wanna get this shit over with?”
“We love you too, Kacchan.” Kaminari replies and you can head Bakugou growl next to you and you try not to laugh. “I’m sure she’ll be here any sec. She had to grab something for the super special thing she planned.” He said while wiggling his eyebrows and Bakugou just rolled his eyes. Kirishima then kicked Kaminari and whisper-yelled “Dude!” Then he turned back to you guys and said with a nervous smile, “What he means is that Mina wanted this to be the perfect hang out before we have to go back home, so she has some stuff for us.”
“I sure do!” Mina yelled as she burst in the room with her arms up.
“tch- finally” Bakugou mumbled under his breath.
“We just gotta set up and then we can do the super special thing. Sero and Kirishima wanna help me grab some stuff from the kitchen? And then the rest of you can you check to make sure we have enough room in my dorm? Great!” She gave no one time to respond and everyone just got up and followed suit.
“Wait can I use the bathroom first?! I totally gotta take a whiz!” Kaminari whined.
“Yea, just hurry up! I wouldn’t want you to miss anything! Y/N and Bakugou we’ll all meet you up there in a sec!”
Sero, Kirishima, and Mina shuffled into the kitchen while Human Pikachu bolted (lol) to the bathroom. You and Bakugou weren’t as frantic as the others but you still went with it.
When you both arrived you found Mina’s room to be totally clean. “OI, PINKIE YOU’RE RO-!” Bakugou was on the way his way out but then you saw a flash of yellow and the door slamming on Bakugou’s face.
“What the-?” Bakugou tried to turned the handle but it didn’t budge. “I SWEAR IF YOUR PLAN WAS TO PRANK US IM GONNA BURN YOUR DUMBASSES ALL TO HELL!! NOW LET US OUT!!” He banged on the door, still attempting to get out, but all he heard back was some snickers and the sound of something being put in front of the door. The Pomeranian, now angered, was still aimlessly attacking the door until he heard you sigh and flop on the bed.
Sprawled out with your hands covering your face you muttered, “Ugh, I’m sorry.”
Bakugou stopped and turned around to face you being the most confused you’ve ever seen him, “Wait... you knew about this!” He started stomping over.
You quickly sat up anticipating something to happen. “No, no I didn’t. I just.. I think I know what this is about. I think this is all because of something I said to Mina.”
You move your eyes around the room afraid to make contact with the ruby eyes of the man standing above you.
“And what’s that?”
You sigh and fidget with your fingers, “Well, I may as well say it because I don’t think we’ll get out of here otherwise. I like you, Bakugou. I have for a bit now and didn’t know what to do. So I asked Mina, and this is definitely not how I wanted to handle it so I’m sorry and-“ you were interrupted by Bakugou tilting your head up which was staring at the floor while you rambled. He quickly leaned down and pressed his lips against yours. You sat there wide-eyed. Not that it wasn’t good (it was), you were just thinking holy shit, my crush is on my face right now.
“Shit, I’m sorry I should’ve asked first. I just wanted to stop you because you don’t need to apologize. And I’m pretty sure you know this now but I like you too I guess. I don’t find you as annoying as I probably should. I haven��t for a while now.” He now was stood back up with a blush spread across his face and his one hand in this pocket with the other one rubbing the back of his neck. You stand up next to him and place your arms on his shoulders.
You giggle and say, “It’s okay. I enjoyed it. I was just surprised because I didn’t expect it from you. I actually think we should do it again.”
“Really?” He looked up as you nodded in response while biting your lip. You both then leaned in and kissed each other once more. It was definitely not as awkward as the first one. The kiss was sweet and passionate. When Bakugou feels something, he feels it wholeheartedly and it was evident in the way he was kissing you. He treated you as if you were an illusion that could shatter at any moment and he wasn’t going to take any of his time with you for granted.
You were suddenly interrupted by a loud banging on the door, “YOU LOVEBIRDS DONE IN THERE YET?!!! I ACTUALLY WANTED TO DO STUFF TONIGHT!!” Mina yelled through the door.
When you’re close to me
Bakugou woke up again but this time due to you booping his nose. “Good morning, Sunshine.” You whispered as you placed a kiss where had previously booped him. He just groaned and looked over to see the clock reading 8:30 AM. When he looked back your head was on his chest while you held onto him. He smiled a bit and pulled you in closer.
“Can we just stay like this all day, babe?” He said with his cheek pressed on the top of your head.
“Did I hear that correctly? Katsuki Bakugou said he wanted to stay in bed?! I must be dreaming still.”
“Tch, you’re such an idiot.” He chuckled and pressed a kiss onto the top of your head. “I love you though, you know that right?”
“Enough to help me make us some breakfast in bed?” You looked up at him with puppy eyes. He just sighed loudly and started to dramatically get out of bed. You soon followed and caught up to give him a hug as he grabbed stuff from the fridge. “I love you too, ‘Suki.”
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tallys-train-blog · 3 years
Note
Can you please make some dating headcanons for the Star Tugs, please? (You can do the Z-Stacks later if you want to)
*screaming* IM BACK
I've been working on this for like 2 months, it sat in my drafts box for about a month and a half with just TenCents' and then Big mac was added like a month ago LMAO
Why not make it an even longer post?👀
Star Tugs, Z-Stacks character relationship headcanons
Sorry about the massive post ya'll hope you enjoy
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
Star Tugs
Tencents
General
Very loving throughout the whe relationship but can be very hardheaded/stubborn.
Will bring you flowers when ever he can or leaves notes on your door/office.
Loves to cuddle and watch movies at night.
Favorite dates are sitting at the end of the doc and talking with you.
Beginning of relationship
Thought that you would never like him or want to date him so be kind of acted cruel when feelings arose.
And then something happened
You were pushed off one of the tugs once and without thinking TenCents dove into the frigid water after you and pulled you out.
He held you in his arms until medical personnel could show up and he broke down when you left in an ambulance.
He showed up to the hospital the next day with flowers and when he saw the tubes and wires he cried
Throughout your stay he cringed a little as tubes and such were taken out.
He stayed by your side and held your hand until you woke up and kissed you the minute he could.
He told you how much he loved you and how he felt so bad for being such an ass and he ended up spending the night curled up in your hospital bed with you.
Oj and Hercules still have the photos
Big Mac
General
Veey sweet man
Loves to tease you though so be prepared.
Will give you kisses on the cheek as a way to show love or as a goodbye if he's in a rush.
Kind of protective, specifically when it comes to the Z stacks.
Beginning of relationship
You never expected him to have feelings for you. Not because he does what TenCents does, but because he shows his love in ways that you really have to look for.
You work with him? He'll help you and work with you whenever he can.
You live with the fleet? Will try and help you with meals or cleaning or just keep you company.
He vents to you a lot and thats another way you can tell you've learned his trust.
When he asks you out it's more or less a "would you like to see a movie together?" Or something along the lines of that.
Your first "date" was very sweet and he did did his best to spoil you and make you feel comfortable.
The first time he said i love you, you bith looked at eachother stunned and then smiled
10/10 amazing man.
Otis Jones (O.J)
General
Very sweet and traditional lover.
Will compliment everything, your eyes, your smile, your laugh, you hands, anything he can compliment he will atleast twice.
Is traditional in the sense that you aren't officially dating until he takes you out a few times
Holds your hands and give you kisses on your knuckles whenever
He also does this little thing that if your hands are scuffed or dried he'll put lotion on them for you.
Beginning of relationship
Very upfront with his feelings as he knows that keeping them hidden can only hurt your relationship with eachother.
Very politely asks you while making dinner or cleaning the dishes with you.
Doesn't want to tell anyone until your officially together and comfortable with it.
As i said before he wants to take you out and test the waters a few times to see how you feel about dating.
Brings you daisies and always holds your hand when showing you something.
Top Hat
General
Shows his love through buying gifts and surprisingly, dancing!
Is like Otis in the sense that he wants to take you out a few times before being official.
Little side note, your first kiss was on the stern of his boat as the sun went down to the song You Send Me by Sam Cooke during a party.
Beginning of Relationship
Grampus and Billy were the first to find out and Tophat was slightly pissed.
His love language is very much physical touch and buying gifts so things like slow dancing, soft touches, and new jewelry.
Kind of rubs that whole thing in Hercules' face
Doesn't want kids but very much loves yours if you have them or your nieces and nephews.
If you have siblings he will definitely have a drink with them and have long conversations with them so long as they are smart and can be sarcastic.
You have a promise ring with it, it's a thing for if he ever has to go out to sea you know he's with you.
Plans on marrying you as you are the only person he's been very attached to.
Warrior
General
Very much a himbo but he loves you so much.
Fell very hard very very quick and Big Mac kimd of teased him for it but definitely cheered him on.
Very very in love with you and was the first to say I love you.
Beginning of relationship
Isn't good at dancing or with his words so he told you he loved you by writing it out in a letter.
Walks down the docks while you take about your day and how you're feeling are his favorite "dates".
Loves to hear you laugh so very much, it never fails to make him smile.
Will give you kisses randomly and that's how the rest of the fleet found out.
He had a job with SunShine and as a way to say good bye he ran up to you, grabbed you, and kissed you and ran.
50/10 very loving and genuine man.
Hercules (my most developed character LMAO)
General
O h t h i s m a n i s a f l i r t .
Lives to make you flush.
Gave you a necklace with a photo of him and TenCents in it (TC is basically his son).
Gave you little hints that he was smitten with you right off the bat.
Wasn't afraid to ask you to dinner but you weren't official as he wanted to test the water bc past relationships went to hell.
Everyone knew he had actual feelings for you, he was sweeter on you and seemed to trust you more, and smile at you more than the others and is always more goofy around you.
Beginning of relationship
Took you to a bar to go dancing and the song Sh-Boom - Life Could Be A Dream came on and when he dipped you at the end of the song he kissed you and held you close as the next song came on, foreheads pressed together.
Definitely sleeps with you in his arms every night and his two cats sleep with you. (TenCents and Sunshine have konked out with guys a few times.
Dates where you lay out a blanket in a field and read or look at the stars are very common (he does this thing when if you're on your stomach reading he'll lay his head on your thighs or ass)
Again, lives to make you blush and he'll do basically anything to make you turn as red as TenCents' Scarf.
Loves to dance and sing.
Dusk is sometimes spent dancing on his boat.
Loves to dance to hound dog with you
Sunshine
General
Relatively mature lover.
Very gentle and sweet on you and loves to make you laugh and smile.
Could be covered in grease or dust after work and would still bring you flowers or a sea shell he found if he got the chance.
"Oh boy, here comes lover boy Sunshine!" -tophat
Big mac definitely soothed him into telling you about his feelings.
Beginning of relationship
Very nervous to tell you and stuttered a little when talking to you.
Grabbed your hand by accident one day and thats when you turned to him and told him you had feelings for him.
Poor man almost passed put and fell into the water out of pire relief.
Nights spent watching movies or sitting on the beach talking about dumb things together are his favorite ways to spend time with you.
Z-stacks
Zorran
General
Oh god you never thought he had feelings for you.
He was a complete asshole and seemed to live pissing you off.
So when he asked you out you were stunned and almost turned him down, but decided you would give it a shot.
Very difficult man, but he was a lot softer on you after a little while.
Beginning of relationship
This relationship definitely started by you snapping at him over something hime dod and him leaning down to your face and saying something like "well aren't you a cutie"
You just about smacked him and then it settled in that he was basically flirting with you.
First date consisted of a walk down the streets of San Francisco (yes this au is in SF CA bite me.)
He took you into a shop and pointed out a cat stuffie that you said looked like one you had when you were little and he bought it for you with a red bow on it a few days later.
His love language is definitely gifts.
Zebedee (my love)
General
Absolutely lover man
Basically the Hercules of the Z-stacks just a little harder to read.
Has a son. His name is Zip. You are a parent now.
Zebedee was brought up in a weird house hold so he works very hard to make sure you are comfortable and he doesnt make the relationship miserable.
Beginning of relationship
Was quite open about the whole thing and surprisingly practically cussed out Zorran when he started with his shit.
Very much a sweetheart and would do anything with you if he could.
Zak
General
Dickwad. Doesn't know how to show his love for you, but it's there.
Shows his love by being protective and always being aroune basically.
Very rarely actually smiles but when he does cherish the fucking moment.
Beginning of relationship
"Sir wtf everyone thinks you hate them" kind of vibe.
Thought he just wanted to get to know you but now you're a week into the relationship and holy fuck i want to get married.
Wants to hold your hand most of the time and just hear your voice.
Zug
General
Little bit of an asshole but tries his best
Buys you little things like journals if you like to write or seeds if you have a garden.
Wears ties and always has you pick them out and if you aren't around he wears the one with your favorite flowers or colors on it.
Beginning of relationship
Teases you and acts like a big man when you first get together but then he realizes how much he loves you and becomes a big softy.
Loves to cuddle randomly and Zorran is a little piss baby about it
Loves everything about you, especially your eyes and he always makes it known.
Zip
General
Kind of a ditz but you have to love him for it.
He was a stuttering mess when he told you he had caught feelings and held out a single sunflower for you to take.
Loves to lay his hedon your lap as you play with his hair and talk or watch a movie.
Likes to write stories, a lot of them involve you, and he reads them to you! He's a very good writer and so many of his characters are really well developed and beautifully designed.
He has a little brother named Zacary (Xacary?) and his brother often helps Zip set dates and such up
Beginning of relationship
I have a little headcanon that Zip might have partial autism but he has ADHD and he was abused as a kid so the relationship is a little rough for him at first.
Adjusting to the whole thing of hey they love me, i love them, i can trust them.
But as he warms up he helps more, and dances with you more, and begins to really thrive in the relationship.
Is definitely in love with you even if he forgets to tell you some days.
He's trying his hardest, give him a little time
Zorran definitely had feelings for you qnd was pissy when you fell for Zip and Zip fell for you
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
Gonna add Boomer, Lillie, Billy, Grampus, and Cappy on later in a reblog.
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scvrllet · 4 years
Text
sides / b.r jr.
Tumblr media
Pairing: Barty Crouch Jr. x Reader
Summary: Years after his sudden disappearance you find the man you fell in love with all those years ago but he has to pick a side; yours or the Dark Lord’s
Bold part is from @corvidprompts​
Warning(s): implication of smut
A/N: Bro idek what that ending was and I’m clearing up my drafts so I’m sorry for this trash. 
The Quidditch World Cup took place this year and you expected it to be a peaceful trip but oh how you were so wrong. Flames consumed the tents people had set up which left the place in ruins. A majority of the people who had come to watch the game had now fled, you were among the handful of people who stayed back. 
With a heart too big for your own good, you stayed back and helped some people who had been trampled in the sudden attack. As you helped a boy, who you soon realized was Harry Potter, the two of you saw a man cast the dark mark into the sky. He was a few yards ahead of you but he saw you both and started heading closer. 
“Go, run.” You told the boy who only looked at you in fear.
“What about you?”
“I’ll be fine.” And with that he ran away, leaving you hiding behind a tent. 
You heard his steps and heavy breathing getting closer and with your wand at your side, you stepped away and pointed it at the man. Scarlet light emitted from it and the man went flying back, his wand now only a few feet away from him.With your wand pointed at his neck while you struggled to get him to stay still, you failed to look at who the man was as you straddled their hips. You paid no mind to an odd sense of familiarity as you fought to get him still. 
“(Y/N)?” The familiar voice brought flooded your mind with memories, both happy and unhappy ones. Mumbling the wand lighting charm you saw the one person you thought you’d never see again. 
“Barty...” Neither of you knew what to say, spending a minute to just look at each other in disbelief until a smirk formed on his lips. You didn’t understand why until you realized the position you were in, straddling his hips in attempt to get him still a few minutes ago. You quickly got off and stood up, hoping that he wouldn’t see your flustered face. Extending your hand out for him to take, he let you help him up and watched as he dusted himself off. 
“Still a feisty as before I see.” He chuckled.
Suddenly the sound of Aurors approaching alerted the two of you and without another word, Barty grabbed onto hand and apparated to what you assumed was an abandoned home. Questions rushed through your head but you asked him the one that bugged you since you saw him “How are you alive? I attended your funeral.”
“And so did I, under an invisibility cloak that is.” He replied, walking over to the fireplace and muttered “incendio”, watching as flames erupted and provided a warm glow. “Mother switched places with me under a polyjuice potion, I’ve been under the imperius curse for months by my father.”
You took a moment to register what he was telling you, still in disbelief of how he was here now. Numerous questions were still begging to be answered but instead of asking you grabbed the collar of his shirt and pressed your mouth on his. The action caught him off guard and you felt him tense up but quickly relaxed and tangled his fingers in your hair while his free hand pulled your waist closer to him. There was no turning back now as he took off his shirt.
*
“I missed this.” He mumbled against your neck. Turning around you smiled at him before getting out of the bed and picking up your clothes off the ground then heading to the bathroom. You ran a hot shower to ease your sore body, allowing your thoughts to run freely through your mind. 
Leaving the bathroom and stepping into the bedroom you noticed the bed was now empty, his shoes and coat still on the ground. You left the bedroom and roamed around the house in search of Barty, eventually finding him in what looked like a library. His back was facing you as he sat by a piano, staring at the numerous books in the shelves.
“Do you remember when we first met?” He asked you, his back still facing you.
“I do.” 
It was around 2 in the morning and you decided to sneak into the library. having read almost all of the books there, you decided to go into the restricted section. You roamed the area in hopes of finding something interesting and landed upon something about the Dark Arts. It was a subject that always intrigued you but was something you didn’t want to play with. As you went to grab the book you felt someone else pull on the book from the other side. You snatched the book and heard a footsteps turn the corner. 
“Why would a girl like you want to read about the Dark Arts?” a boy asked you with his arms crossed as he leaned against the shelves with a playful smirk. He had messy brown hair and wore a a black jumper with black joggers.
“I think I’m allowed to read what I want.” You huffed, placing the book by your side as you looked at him. 
“But why in the restricted section? I’m pretty sure its restricted for a reason.”
“Then why are you here?” The boy put his hands up in surrender, standing up straight as he walked towards you with a charming smile. 
“Barty Crouch.” He introduced, sticking his hand out which you hesitantly shook.
“(Y/N) (Y/L/N).” 
That was in your sixth year at Hogwarts. The night you met him you knew it wouldn’t be the last, it was something about him that just intrigued you and he just felt the same towards you.
For the next few minutes you found yourself sitting beside Barty at the piano as he taught you how to play. It was relaxing for the both of you, especially Barty who seemed to lose himself while playing. Eventually you had given up and rested your head on his shoulder as he played a song. 
“Why do you still follow him?” You asked him as his song ended, your voice echoing off the walls of the room. Barty took a moment to answer, not sure of what to say for he didn’t know why either.
“I, I don’t know.” 
“Come with me then. Just like when we were in Hogwarts, you always talked about wanting to live in a cottage surrounded by nature. We can have that, just forget them. Forget them all- come with me.” 
“(Y/N)...”
“No, I know, please, don’t say anything, let me argue my case, don’t look at me like that, they don’t deserve you, come with me, and I’ll take you away somewhere safe. Some little cottage in the woods somewhere, chickens and bees and why are you crying, please, we can have it, just come here-”
“I already proved my loyalty to him after we graduated. I can’t just, leave. Especially now when he’d so close to succeeding. Trust me, if I could I’d drop everything and follow you wherever but you have to understand it’s no longer my choice.” Tears ran down his cheek as he spoke, inhaling shaky breathes as he spoke. 
Your heart ached as you listened, you knew he would never agree but at least you could say you tried right? Nodding, you fought back tears as you got up from the bench and placed a kiss on his cheek before turning around to leave.
“(Y/N), no. Come back. Please.” His pleads fell on deaf ears as he watched you leave. Grabbing his wand that rested on top of the piano he pointed it at you and watched as the imperius curse hit you. “I’m sorry.” 
Taglist: @lunaralpha270​ @malfwy​ @cleopatera​
if you don’t want to be tagged for a specific character please tell me I don’t wanna be annoying you with fics you don;t wanna read. Also taglist is open if you’d like to be added. I lowkey forgot I had a taglist lmao sorry
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mysticm3ss · 4 years
Note
Could u pls write headcanons/a fanfic about RFA+(V & Saeran if u want to) getting MC pregnant but MC tries to hide her pregnancy (for any reason) and around 3 months later when her stomach starts to grow RFA find her pregnancy test hidden away somewhere and confront her about it. I know u already wrote a headcanon about their kids but I just love any sort of headcanon/fanfic about baby’s and pregnancy’s yknow. Btw I love your requests broski. Your a good writer. Sorry if my English not good lol
sure thing, thank you for requesting and thank you for the compliments! don’t worry your english is perfect! 
so i wrote this literally months ago and forgot it was in my drafts, i’m sorry it’s taken so long to get up!! i rly enjoyed proofreading this bc i’m studying developmental psyc at uni right now and it’s lowkey giving me mad baby fever lmao
(leaving out jaehee for this one bc she ain’t out here getting anyone pregnant, like even if she had a penis she’d be too responsible for that to happen unless it was planned anyway let’s b real. also i varied the way the boys found out a bit as well just so things don’t get too repetitive, hope that’s okay!) 
Yoosung:
The thing you have to know about Yoosung is that he is very small and has no money, so you can only imagine the stress he’s under~
Jokes aside, when you realise you’re pregnant, your first reaction is panic.
You and your boyfriend are both so young–you’re not even old enough to have graduated college yet, how are you going to take care of a child?
It takes you a solid month or two just to come to terms with the pregnancy yourself.
When you finally think you’re feeling brave enough to bring it up to him, the thought of what his family might think acts as another hindrance–he seemed to have a perfect family, and Yoosung himself had admitted they were somewhat conservative… how would they react to your situation?
While you’re busy still coming to terms with it, however, Yoosung accidentally stumbles upon the pregnancy test you had so cleverly hidden in the bathroom cabinet.
You’d slipped it into a box of toiletries, snugly hidden between the myriad of tampons and pads that it held. When Yoosung accidentally knocked it from the cabinet, he scrambled to tidy up, cheeks flushed with embarrassment as he tucked away the sanitary products.
He froze when he saw the test, mind whirring as he struggled to explain away the white stick in his hand.
There was no explaining away those two pink lines, however, and so that night, he dared to broach the subject with you.
He fiddled nervously with his hands as he sat on your shared bed, eyes looking everywhere except your face when you entered the room.
“Yoosung… is everything okay?”
A shaky breath. “MC… are you… you’d tell me if something big happened, right? Like… like if you got pregnant or something?”
The guilt-ridden look on your face was all the answer he needed.
Your eyes welled up, and Yoosung’s arms were instantly around you, pulling you against him as he squeezed you tight despite his own shock.
“MC, why wouldn’t you tell me? How long?” His words were soft; gentle whispers into your ear as his fingers combed through your hair.
When you explained your worries, Yoosung’s heart instantly melted, and he felt guilty that he’d never realised what you’d been going through the past few months.
“Don’t worry about my family, MC– don’t worry about anything at all. I love you, and I love this baby, and we’re going to be so happy, okay? I’m right here, cutie, I’m right here…”
And though your face was buried in his shirt, Yoosung could still feel your smile.
Zen:
We all know that Zen is super-focussed on his career, and in turn, works long hours with early starts and late finishes.
His busy schedule and blooming career is the first thing to cross your mind as you stare at the two glaring pink lines on your pregnancy test.
How were you going to tell him? How would he react? His career was just beginning to take off… what if he didn’t want children so soon?
How were you supposed to deal with that..?
And so, spiralling into uncertainty, you decide to put off telling him for as long as possible; to enjoy your relationship for what it was now, in case it all fell apart.
As a result of Zen’s schedule, it’s not too gruelling to hide your pregnancy from your boyfriend.
You usually wake up to brutal morning sickness hours after he’s already left for work, and your fluctuating hormones generally only make their presence known while you’re on your own.
Regardless, Zen is extremely observant, especially when it comes to his jagiya.
He idly notices that you’ve gained weight, but he’d never bring it up; he honestly doesn’t care, so long as you’re healthy, which you certainly seem to be with how radiant you’ve been the past couple of months.
He does, however, notice that you’re keeping something from him. As to what, he’s not sure.
Zen trusts you wholly and completely, so it doesn’t even cross his mind that you could be hiding anything too big from him (at least, at first).
He figures that maybe you’re just planning a surprise for him, as he’s done a number of times for you in the past few years that the two of you have been dating.
When he comes back early one evening to see that you’re not at home, he sets about making dinner for the two of you and decides to get a head start on the chores.
He knows that he’s slacked off on his household duties lately, and the least he can do is pick up a few now that he has some time at home so that you don’t have to worry about them later.
While your favourite meal is warming on the stove, Zen strips the bed of sheets and gathers your dirty laundry into the hamper. 
When he returns with a load of freshly dried clothes, he begins to pack them away. As he folds your underwear and tucks them into the drawer, he notices what seems to be a piece of paper peeking out from beneath the neatly folded fabric.
Confused, he pulls it out, his breath catching as he sees the ultrasound.
He reads your name and the date over and over, unable to even comprehend that you could keep something like this from him.
He’s crushed that you hadn’t told him, and immediately falls into denial.
This has to be a prank, right? MC would never keep something like this from me…
He’s still frozen, sonogram clutched in hand, when you arrive home.
Zen looks up at you, eyes pleading and face soft with vulnerability as he wordlessly begs an explanation.
“…MC?”
His voice is so quiet and broken that it kills you.
You gently explain that it’s real; that this isn’t a tasteless prank but, in fact, reality. Zen takes a deep breath to steel himself.
“Why wouldn’t you tell me? Don’t you think I’d want to be there, especially for this?” he demands, voice ringing with pain and rising in anger as he holds up the sonogram still crinkled in his fist. 
It takes a bit of explaining on your part, but Zen’s hot temper gets the best of him as he shakes his head and turns away from you. Tears prick your eyes.
“Don’t you see, Zen? This is what I was afraid of!” Your voice cracks, and Zen spares a glance back at you, immediately softening as he sees your glistening eyes and the tears beginning to stain your cheeks.
“MC… I love you. I love this baby. I’d never leave, you know that, don’t you, jagi?” His voice is hushed, his heart breaking as he leans in to brush a tear from your face with his thumb.
“You can’t keep things like this from me, princess… not something this big. If you’re worried, talk to me, okay? I’m in this with you. Forever, remember?”
His arms fall around your shoulders as he crushes you to his chest, before pulling away in panic.
“Crap! Was that too tight? Did I hurt the baby?!”
You laugh, and the sound is music to Zen’s ears as you drag him in for another hug.
Jumin:
When you wake up to a sudden wave of nausea, Jumin’s first reaction is concern.
“O-oh, it’s nothing, it must just be something I ate…”
“I see. I must speak with the chef who cooked for us last night, this is a disgusting oversight on his par-”
No Jumin don’t fire the chef ohmygod
You barely manage to calm Jumin down before you’re huddled over the toilet once more, and he lets all remaining traces of fury evaporate as he focusses on holding back your hair and rubbing your back soothingly.
All the while, your mind can’t help but dart back to the pregnancy test that you’d hidden at the bottom of the wastebasket.
You knew you couldn’t keep this a secret from your husband forever; and in your head, you knew that everything would work out just fine. It wasn’t like you couldn’t afford a child, you had more than enough money to provide for them, it was just…
The two of you hadn’t been together for that long; not really. And although that didn’t diminish your love for one another, it didn’t change the fact that Jumin was still just getting used to being emotionally vulnerable and opening himself up to other people.
Would children be too much, too quickly?
He’d never even expressed interest in having children before; he was far too occupied with you and your relationship, enjoying the joys of the present and letting the future bring what it may.
And although you manage to hide your continual morning sickness from him for a little while, you know that as soon as you start to show, you won’t be able to put it off any longer.
When you wake up feeling nauseous yet again, Jumin declares it the final straw.
“MC, you’re clearly ill. I’m phoning a doctor,” he says, voice stern and leaving no room for disagreement. “I should let Assistant Kang know that I won’t be in for work today…”
Your weak protests fall on deaf ears, and barely half an hour later, Jumin is opening the door…
You didn’t realise that “phoning a doctor” entailed bringing in a whole team of specialists in various medical fields.
They check your vitals, and when you hear them begin to murmur about blood tests, you break.
“Jumin, this isn’t necessary!”
“What? Of course it is–they can help, MC. There’s clearly something wrong-”
“Jumin, I’m pregnant!” you snap, the words falling from your lips before you can register their utterance. Jumin’s eyes widen, and he clears his throat as deafening silence falls over the room.
��Excuse us,” he manages, and the team of specialists quickly and awkwardly take their leave.
Honestly, he’s lowkey offended that you kept it from him.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice is stiff and cold, and your heart sinks as you feebly attempt to explain.
“Do you honestly think so low of me? Do you truly not trust me, after everything that we’ve been through?” he asks, voice hard.
That’s when you start to cry.
Damn hormones!
Jumin immediately softens, pulling you into his arms.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry… you’re right. I do trust you, I swear, I was just… I was scared,” you finally managed, voice thick with tears.
And though it takes a little while, Jumin understands. And once the shock has faded, the small smile that tugs up the corner of his lips betrays the excitement that your news has brought him.
“We’ll have to start thinking of names, hmm?”
Seven:
You could hardly call the life that Seven led “safe.”
The risks that come with his job hardly provide an environment fit to raise a child, a thought that instantly flashed through your mind the instant you saw the two lines on the pregnancy test.
You swallow hard, hands shaking as you move to rest a hand over your stomach. If you had to guess, you’d wager that you were at least eight weeks along…
God, had Seven ever mentioned even wanting kids before?
But despite your worries, you couldn’t help but feel a flicker of delight at the idea of raising children with the man you loved so dearly.
Still, that didn’t mean you knew how to tell him.
Luckily, you had time. Seven had been sent on a mission for the agency only that morning, and he wouldn’t be back for at least a month.
Although the news had been initially devastating, you were half-beginning to consider it somewhat of a blessing in disguise… at least you could figure out how to break it to him now, right? It wasn’t like you could break news like that over the phone, after all.
When Seven does finally arrive home, he wastes no time in sweeping you into his arms and planting tiny kisses all across your cheeks, your nose, your forehead, drinking in your warmth and softness and desperately attempting to atone for all the time with you that he had missed.
After finally pulling away, Seven easily notices that you’ve gained weight–of course, he’d never mention it; you were always beautiful to him.
Regardless, he can’t help but observe that you really do seem to be glowing. 
Saeyoung knows you well enough to easily realise that you’re keeping something from him. He sees the nervous twitch of your fingers, the tightness of your smile…
And so, when the two of you cuddle up on the couch later that evening, Seven pressing kisses to your hair and clinging to you like a baby koala, he finally brings it up.
“Sooo… what aren’t you telling me, MC?” he asks, playfully poking your side despite the worry that claws at his chest.
What if they want to break up? Oh god, what if-
He finds himself so lost in his own concerns that when the words finally fall from your lips, it takes him a moment to process them.
“W-what?”
“I’m… I’m pregnant, Sae.”
You hold your breath, and only release it when you see the huge smile stretch over his face, brighter than the sun and just as warm.
And just like that, you know that everything is going to be just fine.
“If it’s a girl, can we name her Elizabeth?” “Seven nO-”
hope you enjoyed, please reblog/comment if you did! ^^
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COSMIC - S3:E1; Chapter One, Suzie, Do You Copy? - PREVIEW
A Will Byers x Reader Series
Summer brings new jobs and budding romance. But the mood shifts when Dustin's radio picks up a Russian broadcast, and Will senses something is wrong.
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A/n: so I've had this part written for a while, most of it at least and it's just been sitting in my drafts while I work on other stuff. It's barely edited and most importantly I'm not sure if I'm happy with some aspects and mannerisms, like Will is kinda very OOC here towards the end so its likely to expect changes later. Also I'm a clueless asexual who has never kissed anyone so I did my best based off stuff I've read in books lmao✌ please spare me
Love yall and hope you enjoy this small preview!
||3rd Person POV||
The faint sound of crickets could barely be heard over the soft music of The Power of Love by Heuy Lewis and The News plays from inside Castle Byers. Soft yellow light spills out from the cracks and slits of the castle from the battery powered lamp where the young couple sat planning a campaign. It was clear that both had done a great deal of growing over the summer, just as their friends had. Will most of all, as he sat now in Castle Byers, he did so with the slightest of hunches seeing as he had sprouted tremendously in height. His shoulders had broadened a bit, and his voice had lowered as much has he had grown.
As for Y/n, the changes in her were more internal than external. Like Will, her physique had changed though not quite as drastically. Her features were far more defined than they had been in previous years, but the biggest change within her was how she held herself. The months since that dreadful night at the cabin, she had dedicated every spare moment to learning about herself... About her powers.
And now more than ever, she's was one with her abilities. With help from El, and the overwhelming support from Will, she exuded a whole new level of strength and confidence in herself. Something that set her apart from her previous attempts in secret the year before. Now with help, she thrived.
"The power of love is a curious thing
Make a one man weep, make another man sing"
"So what if, when they enter the tomb of Kuzatan - the villagers being in danger I'm sure would give them no way to cheat their way out - and then they..." her voice trails off, getting lost in the notes that seep into the air. She quirks a brow at the boy before her. "Will, hon? You listening?"
"Mmm?" Will hummed, torn suddenly from his blissful gaze.
Having been caught staring at Y/n, she realized he had missed the question. She laughed, shaking her head. Butterflies erupted in Will's stomach at the sound, and he realized he may never grow tired of it. He still couldn't believe his luck that she was dating him.
The corners of his lips tugged into a small grin as he mumbled a 'sorry'. Y/n simpered, trying to shake off the the dizziness in her head that always appeared when he made her heart flutter.
She returned to her notes, and he lovingly watched her speak. His eyes would occasionally fall to her lips but he was drawn back to her eyes and the concentration they possessed. All the while the sappy lyrics spilling their way into his subconscious as he listened.
"Don't need money, don't take fame
Don't need no credit card to ride this train"
Just two years ago, the thought of her liking him was a myth in his eyes. Her ever noticing him as more than a friend was a sickly sweet dream that would never see the light of day.
"It's strong and it's sudden and it's cruel sometimes"
And last year, with the Mind Flayer... He hated the thoughts he had, the feelings he felt when the Mind Flayer took over. The hate and disgust that crept up whenever she was around but he fought it. Though he could never forget the look on her face when the mind flayer spit at her.
"But it might just save your life
That's the power of love"
But now. They were happy. She saved him, and after his recovery, they were finally together.
"Will!" She laughed sharply, reaching over and swatting him lightly on the arm with her notebook.
Will was pulled from his daze yet again, no longer trying to hide the happiness and bliss he felt.
She smiled fondly and shook her head, placing her arm on his shoulder and pulled him in for a kiss. The music playing from the radio she had gifted to him a year before swelled as their lips met in a tender kiss.
"That's the power of love,"
After several moments their lips break apart but their foreheads remained glued together. A light laugh breaks out between them, escaping through the blinding grins carved into their faces. Her eyes travel from the ground to meet with his, only to find he had already been staring at her with the same love sick gaze. It brings the same storm of butterflies in her stomach and sporadic beating of her heart.
Neither Will or Y/n could recall a time either of them felt this happy.
Y/n's gaze flickers back to Will's lips. She flashes a warm grin and gives him one last and swift peck on the lips before sitting back up. She tucks her notes father into her lap and that is when she catches sight of the time displayed on her watch.
"Shit,"
Immediately, Will's mood shifts.
"What? What's wrong?"
Her eyes find his and she quirks a brow, her hands already collecting their campaign papers and stowing them away in safe place.
"We're late."
Out of reflex, Will checks his watch. His eyes widen in a brief flicker before gathering his things, though his movements are not as hasty as hers. He gathers his campaign papers, his eyes glazing over several notes he had made. The smallest bud of unease blooms in his stomach.
"You really think they'll like this campaign?" He asks, his gleeful composure fading for the first time since her visit.
The ache in his voice captures her attention, and quickly she drops what she's doing. She immediately recognizes the uncertainty in his features, and feels a tug on her heart. A sad smile graces her face, and she drops her folder before leaning forward and cupping his face in her palms forcing him to look at her. His wide hazel eyes search hers finding nothing but love and comfort in them.
"They're gonna love it, Will. Cause, it came from you. Remember, " she smirks when his smile begins to return. "I'm just helping out."
Before he can protest she brings his face forward with a small hum, planting a kiss on his nose with a dramatic smack of her lips. His face errupts into a violent shade of scarlet against his wishes. After all this time, Y/n still managed to have this effect on him. She begins to lean away when she knows she's cheered him up, but before she can escape he captures her in another sweet kiss. He can faintly make out the f/f slurpee that lingered from earlier that day. She hums contently and it blends perfectly with the drumming of his heart. He can feel his cheeks grow hot not just from his fluster but the feel of her palms growing warm against his skin.
Like Y/n's laugh, her warmth was something he was certain he would never tire of. It was something he had always seen in her, but after her powers had been discovered, it was only more obvious. Her touch always reminded him of the sun streaming in through the window on a chilly morning; a toasty blanket of light that hit your face just right. And he felt it now on his face as she kissed him. Although it was cut far too short in Will's opinion as she broke apart for air. Her thumb softly strokes his cheek, the pads of her fingers and palm still warm to the touch as sends him one more reassuring smile.
"And even if they don't," she continues, a spark of mischief in her eyes. "I'll blast 'em for ya."
Will chuckles, bringing his hand up to cup hers in thanks, nevermind the fact he didn't want her to let go quite yet. Alas, yet another moment lost to time. Her warm palms leave his face and immediately he feels colder, but he also knows they don't want to miss the movie. He smiles to himself as he packs up the remainder of his things as he thinks about it. His hands were almost always cold, a trait he had long before the Mind Flayer. And had it not been for her powers, Y/n might have been the same. It was yet another reason they fit so well together.
The crunch of a very small twig beneath Y/n's sneakers bring him back to reality for the third time. He looks up at Y/n to find her balanced on her tiptoes, legs folded ready to stand and she extends her palm for him to take.
"Come on, Sir Will," she says through coy smile, her head gesturing behind her towards the cloaked entrance to the castle. "The party awaits."
He brings himself to his knees to match her, ready to stand and duck outside into the night when he takes her hand. His thumb grazes her knuckles before planting a quick kiss on them, bringing a natural heat to her neck and face.
His face quickly contorts into a feigned expression of seriousness, all while dawning a fleeting and silly attitude as he waves his finger in the air. The way he always did as Will the Wise during campaigns.
"Then what are we waiting for, Y/C/N? Let us make haste!"
Will watches triumphantly as her lips press into a firm line that begins to twitch, the tell-tale signs she was fighting a losing battle with a grin as she shook her head. Y/n had yet to get used to this side of Will, though she did enjoy it. Since their time at the Snowball - their first kiss - he had been far more relaxed. To the point where he would be cracking jokes, or surprising her with romantic gestures as such. It rarely came out like this, and when it did it was never around the others. It was something she wished they could see, but Y/n couldn't help the flutter of her heart knowing she was the only one to bring it out in him. She looks down at his soft gaze and humor in his eyes, before rolling her own, rising to her feet and ducking out through the curtain door to avoid being caught with a smile.
"Dork," she laughs, her knuckles tingling from the unexpected gesture.
She hears his soft chuckles from behind her before he joins her side, and the couple falls into a comfortable silence as they grab their bikes of the forest floor and ride off into the night to the infamous Starcourt Mall.
+++
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sunaswife · 3 years
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🔪: I was going through my drafts and I found this piece that I never published nor deleted so I guess it’s another extra lmao! Hope you enjoy!
THESE ARE ALSO UNEDITED IM SORRY
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“Y/N senpai! What a surprise!” Hinata yelled when he saw you pop your head in the gym. You smiled softly and waved. “Hello, I hope I’m not interrupting. I brought snacks!” You said and coach Ukai called break. Immediately Yachi who was now the new main manager grabbed the bag from your hands and told Yamaguchi to bring you a seat. When you finally got to sit you sighed and leaned back on the chair. Your hand rested on top of your growing belly, you were already a few months and received info that you were not expecting one, but two babies.
You were pretty stressed and worried if you could even afford to take care of two of them but you had to at least try. It was your decision to keep them and now you can’t leave them. “Thank you for the food!” They all said and you nodded and smiled softly. “How’s everyone captain?” You asked as Ennoshita sat next to you munching his onigiri. “I don’t think you can ever calm Kageyama and Hinata but surprisingly we’re doing pretty well. I’m still getting used to the whole captain title.” He chuckled and you nodded. “It’s okay, I know you can do an amazing job. If my cousin brings you trouble you let me know alright? I’ll make sure pound him to the ground. I don’t care if I’m seven months pregnant.” You said and he laughed.
“Psst is it me or does captain have a crush on Y/N-Senpai.” Hinata whispered to Nishinoya. “Impossible! I already swore I would marry her. I don’t care if she has kids I’ll raise them as my own!” He huffed and you and Ennoshita turned to give him a glare and he shuttered. “Sorry, Kageyama.” He immediately apologized.
It was honestly a surprise to everyone that Nishinoya was your number one simp. Even when he found out you were pregnant he still said he’d marry you and you quickly declined him. He was sweet but not your type and you were not looking for a relationship any time soon.
“Nah they’re just friends, since she’s doing online classes, Ennoshita helps her a bit or vice versa cause they’re both hella smart.” Tobio said as he stared at his cousin. As much as he loves having you around, you shouldn’t be coming to his school by yourself. “What does vice versa mean?” Hinata asked and Tsukki sighed at how stupid the ginger was.
When they finished their snacks you had to sit outside the door with the net covering in case the ball came flying and you wouldn’t get hurt. You honestly couldn’t get over your new student Hinata and your cousin Tobio with their quick attacks. They were certainly going to be a unstoppable this year or even better if they keep going the way they are.
When practice ended you and Tobio were walking home with the team in front. You were kinda slow but Tobio was always patient. Hinata would ask you a whole bunch of questions regarding your time at Inarizaki and your just awkwardly smile and tell him what he wanted to know. You didn’t have anymore ally’s in the volleyball team, only Hitoshi and a few of the old first years so you decided to spill all the secrets you knew as revenge for when they made it back to nationals.
If Inarizaki even goes.
But yet again as much as you’d hate to admit it, they’re an amazing team. Especially Atsumu who was the star player in every game. “Y/N-senpai, have you picked the names of your babies? Please don’t be like my mom and hide the name until the day of because then I’m going to get impatient.” He asked hopefully.
Tobio was listening intently because you haven’t told him either. “Well for a girl I was thinking Akira, and for the boy, Rini. But I’m having twins so I can have both.” You giggled and his and Tobio’s eyes widened. “Those are such beautiful names!” Hinata gasped. “Thank you! I tried so hard to pick the right one and I think they’re perfect.” You said with a soft smile.
“They are perfect. I can’t wait to hold them. I’ll be the best uncle ever and I’ll teach them volleyball for you!” He said excitedly. “I’m sure you’ll be amazing.” You giggled and pat his head. He smiled back and continued to much his onigiri.
🏷: @therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @sarahvvictoria @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @iloveanime691 @tpwkatsumu @ohrintarou @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki @yoozuku @osamus-onigiri @akaashi-todorki @donica95 @kakaokenma @airheadpillar
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ironxkid · 3 years
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why don't you like endgame or civil war
((hoo buddy, idk what brought this up but salt under the cut!! Like... a lot of salt - specifically regarding Endgame lmao
I’m gonna start off with CACW because it’s a short response lol
I don’t like it simply because I was done with the infighting between the Avengers. The found family crumbs we were given in Endgame was something I really wanted to see, and them just... ripping them apart frustrated me lol
honestly, the movie was... fine? Idk, I found it to be a lil slow for my taste (it felt like it just dragged on when I watched it in theaters), and I just don’t care for it in general  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Also, ngl, I’m really bummed that Captain America: Serpent Society was a joke announcement because that sounds dope as hell and I really wanted to see that before I realized it’d been a joke dfgjhdsfhj
but, yeah, literally just because CACW is specifically an infighting movie annoys me to no end so I just won’t watch it again dgsfjhsfdhj
now, Endgame?
fuck Endgame
I. have a lot of issues with it, all of which are major grievances throughout the fandom. I’m pissed they killed Natasha and didn’t even bother giving her a fucking funeral because, I quote from Joe Russo, “Well, Tony does not have another movie. Tony is done. And Natasha has another film. And Marvel Universe obviously does not have to move forward linearly anymore. But that character still has more screen time coming.” (see here) and that annoys the hell out of me. She’s getting another movie - great! So you killed one of the few characters doing her fucking best to keep everything together at the compound, the one who was taking charge, give her a big role, and then murk her and... give her nothing but a brief mention at the end. Like... what the fuck? Natasha deserved so much better than what she was given. Tony’s funeral could’ve (and, frankly, should’ve) been a funeral for him, Natasha, and Vision because god forbid we see anyone mourn Vision other than Wanda
(actually this post covers how Endgame fucked over the MCU women perfectly, though Wanda’s not mentioned :c )
plus... Tony’s not done lol - he’s still a massive figure in the films/shows despite RDJ not acting in them, so his character has left shockwaves that aren’t dying any time soon. Natasha... basically disappeared, and I believe she would’ve been dropped completely if it wasn’t for the fact she does have a film coming out soon. Which, frankly, seems awesome and all, but it’s a film that goes back to post-CACW pre-IW and... frankly doesn’t give me any reason to understand why that means she didn’t get a funeral. She’s not coming back in future movies/shows that are in present MCU timeline - her movie is set in the past. She could’ve gotten a decent sendoff 
now, Clint’s arc as Ronin rubs me the wrong way. I know it’s a huge thing in the comics, and it’s not him taking a different mantle that I have an issue with. It’s the fact he, a white man, went around murdering people and got off scot-free. Yes, he was targeting genuinely bad people, but... to show that, they specifically singled out Mexican cartels and the yakuza (Japanese mafia, essentially) - so, in other words, the bad guys were people of color! I feel like I don’t need to explain how fucked up that is. And, to clarify, I love Clint! Clint is honestly one of my favorite characters, and the whole thing was just handled... poorly in the film
Tony’s arc genuinely hurts. This is a man who has suffered for years and has tried to make things right, and finally got a chance to settle down. He finally retired from the Avengers, finally settled down, and had a fucking life he could enjoy despite his ghosts, and yet... His arc ends with a message of “tortured soul finally gets rest by dying”. Because, y’know, it’s great seeing yet another long-suffering character only reaching peace through death, because god forbid they let characters heal! He could’ve still caused the second Snap, and he could’ve survived. He could’ve finally been able to step away for good and focus on his family, focus on recovering, and be truly happy. What’s so wrong with letting him stay alive so he can rest and be with his family? What’s so wrong with letting a long-suffering character finally find peace after one last bang? 
plus it pisses me off that they’re now using him as a reasoning as to why bad things are still happening. Why is this person the bad guy? Because Tony Stark somehow may or may not have done something that hurt them! Even though most of that really stems from Howard or Obadiah. Tony just ends up getting the blame in their place. He’s just an easy target to use, much like the tesseract seems to be the go-to answer for why things go wrong. But this is a different train of thought
Steve’s ending pisses me off just as much as the next person lmao. You take a character who has acknowledged he no longer belongs in the past (which, funnily enough, was written by the Russos), aaaaaaand have him go back to the past while ignoring two important people in his life that were still right there. He got Bucky and Sam back, and he leaves them. His arc is ruined within a matter of minutes, and it paints a hella bad picture of him in the process. He goes back in time to stay with Peggy (which ultimately destroys her own arc, and the fact she’s a person outside of her relationship (or lack thereof) with him because, y’know, why have her be able to move on and be her own person?), and we’re supposed to believe he’s fine with everything he knows from the future? Fine with knowing Bucky’s trapped with HYDRA and is suffering as the Winter Soldier? Fine with knowing HYDRA has infested SHIELD from day one? Fine with knowing Howard and Maria are going to die? Fine with royally fucking up the timelines? We’re supposed to believe he sat back and did nothing with all of that? They could’ve had him still hand the shield over to Sam - they could’ve let Steve stay an Avenger without the mantle
also the fact the Russos said he didn’t recognize Red Skull when he returned to Vormir to return the soul stone? Like... what the fuck?? Not to mention he literally returns the stone to Vormir, which “soul for a soul”, and they didn’t bring Nat back that way??
and now onto Thor. Thor... holy fuck is this hitting something personal for me. Thor was ridden with guilt - he was furious with himself, hated himself, and blamed himself for failing to stop the Snap. He fell into a massive depression, and... was promptly danced around as laughing stock. Like, “oh! look at Thor! he’s fat and drunk because he’s depressed haha!” - like fuck off. It’s not funny in any form. His suffering was made into a joke and it pisses me off because I suffer from depression. A lot of people suffer from depression. It’s not funny. It’s fucking terrifying at times. I wasted a shit ton of money on a stupid online sim game because it was a distraction - it gave me... god, I wouldn’t even say temporary happiness, but it gave me something to temporarily help, and I still hate myself for doing it. It was a poor decision on my part, and I wish I could change it. And, during that time, I was scared because I couldn’t see myself pulling out of it. I thought I was gonna feel that way forever. I called out of work multiple times because there were days I couldn’t stop crying (something I still feel horrible for doing), I couldn’t get myself to contact any of my friends for months, and it was all because the medication I was on at the time... stopped working. Thankfully, my depression doesn’t work in a way that makes me a danger to myself, so that wasn’t an issue, but it still fucking sucked. And to see a character that I could relate to on such a personal level treated as laughing stock fucking hurt. I’m not sharing this for sympathy - I’m sharing this because it Thor’s arc hit home and it’s literally the main reason why I will not watch Endgame again
this is more of a nitpick than anything else, but... I didn’t really care for Carol in it tbh? Which is unfortunately because Captain Marvel is one of my absolute favorite movies! And I’m well aware she was introduced in Endgame while CM was being drafted, but that in itself is annoying?? Because Carol was originally going to be introduced in AoU, but was cut because it wasn’t going to introduce her character properly. And yet they decide to introduce her character in a clusterfuck of a movie before her movie is in the final stages, and proceed to release her movie first and then give a complete different characterization in her following appearance
honestly I just wanna cover this now to clarify some things regarding Carter and her backstory: the only reason I keep Endgame as is is because it felt easier for me to do so for the purpose of bending canon for specific threads. I wanted to stay as true to the given plots as possible to help with fudging of both the movies and her background, and also because I didn’t want anyone to feel like I was trying to force my own headcanons onto them, y’know? 
I’m just gonna plug this here because fuck it lol, but I did start a fix-it fic regarding Endgame that you can read here! I... probably won’t finish it tbh, and I haven’t gone over it in a hot minute so it might be riddled with errors ahah - plus I’m not sure about how I wrote the characters! I get nervous when writing canon characters because I feel like I’ll miss their characterization completely, which is actually why I,,, rarely rp canon characters dgfjhgsfdhj
also the image in the doc was created by @/archervale!! 
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daroamine · 4 years
Text
i may or may not have written a small trans logan fic.
uh, here. take it.
feels like i'm somebody else
ao3 link
----summary----
“It’s not a manbun, Lexi! You’re a girl!”
Logan felt something in his chest plummet as he heard the words.
He turned and reached for the crofters in the cupboard so he wouldn’t be forced to look at Patton’s amused face. His stomach felt… Strange. Like he had butterflies, or he was hungry. It felt like it was twisted inside and, if he was honest, it felt awful.
--
Or
The fic where Logan is a closeted trans man, and the others really, really aren't helping.
Also his boyfriend is great.
notes:
This has been sitting in drafts for months because I'm unmotivated 24/7 but it's here and it exists. I'm pretty sure it's not what I wanted the ending to be but I don't remember my original idea, so have this one lmao. Title from the song 'Overwhelmed' by Royal & The Serpent.
---fic start---
“It’s not a manbun, Lexi! You’re a girl!”
Logan felt something in his chest plummet as he heard the words.
He turned and reached for the crofters in the cupboard so he wouldn’t be forced to look at Patton’s amused face. His stomach felt… Strange. Like he had butterflies, or he was hungry. It felt like it was twisted inside and, if he was honest, it felt awful.
His hand clasped the jam jar, and he noted absently that it was lightly shaking.
Ah. A not-good day, then. Logan typically was free from a lot of dysphoria, and for that he was immensely grateful, but today it seemed he would not be as lucky.
You’re a girl! You’re a girl, you’re a girl, you’re a girl...
The words repeated in his head like some sort of chant, and he inhaled shakily, gripping the jar to his chest in the hopes of grounding himself.
Patton was wrong. Logan was male.
Of course he was.
He was sure of his identity, he was a male. A man. Masculine.
His throat convulsed in a dry swallow, and he turned to take two slices of bread from the bag. His excitement and joy for the menial task of using crofters for breakfast had vanished, instead leaving an empty, aching feeling in his gut and chest.
He was a boy.
“Lexi?” the sweet voice behind him said, and he turned a little too jerkily to face him. “Could you pass me the pancake mix? The others will be awake soon.”
The bottle felt strange under his sweating palms, and he could feel how it shook in his grip.
He held onto it with both hands to mask the movements.
Girl, girl, girl, girl, girl-
Shut up.
Patton had already turned back around to start the pancake batch, and so Logan let his hands raise up to tug at his tie, the repetitive pulling somehow giving him comfort.
Patton was wrong, wasn’t he? Logan was not a girl. He wasn’t. He was a man. The other side simply wasn’t aware of his identity. It was of no consequence. It did not matter to him.
It did not matter to him.
He repeated it a few times in his mind, but the aching tight feeling behind his ribs did not seem to lessen.
And then, Roman had entered the room.
“Alexia, fair nerd! And how might you be on this fine morning?” his dramatic voice echoed throughout the kitchen, bouncing off the walls.
Alexia. Alexia, Alexia, Alexia…
“Fine, Roman.” he said flatly, looking at the doorframe so as not to meet his eyes.
Logan’s hands had dropped from his tie the second his friend had entered, and so now they lay at his sides, itching to move and fidget to rid himself of this bad feeling.
Honestly, was he going to get like this every time someone made a comment regarding his gender? It was ridiculous.
A hand was laid on his shoulder and he jerked back, the tail of his spine hitting the counter with a thud.
“Woah, there, Specs, just checking you’re A-okay. You seem a little off.”
Roman again.
Logan bit back a sigh, just nodding briskly and clearly replying, “I am quite alright, Roman. I merely haven’t woken up properly yet.”
His voice sounded high, feminine and airy. It made his stomach twist, and he made a note to himself not to speak too much today. It would only make him feel worse.
For the first time that day, he raised his gaze to rest on Roman properly.
The creative side’s freckled face was peering at him, and his hazel-brown eyes seemed mixed with concern. However, he backed off at the last statement and sat down, eyebrows still fixed in a small frown.
Logan’s hands fiddled with his tie again.
All he could think about was Patton’s comment.
It was from an innocent place, really. He had commented on how long Thomas’ hair was getting for all of them, and Logan had pointed out that his could probably fit into a man bun soon. It was distasteful slang, sure, but it was a staple term used in many places for that hairstyle.
“It’s not a manbun, Lexi! You’re a girl!”
Patton was only joking, he reminded himself.
So… Why did his chest feel like it was being squeezed? Why did it feel like he was just a little air short of normal breathing?
He didn’t notice another person enter this time.
Virgil was frowning, as per usual before his morning coffee. The anxious side immediately poured himself a cup, and took a long drink, before glancing at Logan.
Logan realised that this was when he was supposed to berate him on the affects of caffeine on anxiety.
He stayed silent and took a seat, hunching a little to let his shirt fall flatter.
White-knuckled hands gripped the sides of the chair.
Roman shifted easily from his chair into the seat beside him, as Patton still bustled around by the stove.
“One of those days, hm?” he asked quietly, putting a hand on his arm for a moment. Roman’s voice was soft and gentle and caring and Logan felt his chest just squeeze tight.
Blinking hard as an attempt to will the emotions away, he just nodded.
One of those days.
He hesitantly allowed himself to feel at least a little comfort from Roman’s touch, body ever so slightly relaxing-
“Is it that time of the month?”
A tiny noise came out of Logan’s mouth before he could stop it, and he tugged his arm from the other side’s grasp. His throat tightened harshly.
He wanted to just cry and scream and curl up and be a boy.
Logan stood, distantly hearing Virgil berating Roman, “You can’t just ask girls that! You know how Dee gets!” and he dipped his head.
Girl, girl, girl, girl, time of the month-
“Excuse me.” he whispered, choked, and sank out.
--
The second the items in his room came to view, Logan stumbled to his bed and sank down on it, face crumpling.
“I’m not…” he whispered, pulling his knees to his chest.
Not a girl.
“Not a girl, not… I’m a boy, a man, I am male. I-” Logan’s breath hitched and he let out a sob.
This wasn’t fair, this wasn’t fair at all. The other sides don’t feel this way when they are addressed, or talked to, this was different and bad and he hated it.
Deceit could easily live as a female, why couldn’t Logan? What was… Wrong with him? That made him feel like this?
‘You’re being ridiculous.’ he thought to himself harshly. ‘Stop being so immature. You are Logic, an adult. There is no need to get emotional over infinitesimal slights such as these.’
Yet still, he couldn’t seem to stop the tears.
How unbecoming.
Even the way he brushed his hair from his face was feminine, trembling hands feeling delicate and far too small for his body.
As he stared at them, he couldn't help but pray that they would get bigger. Pray that the added flesh on his chest that pushed against his lungs would just go away.
Pray that he wouldn't feel the dip of his waist and the thickness of his hips whenever he curled up into a ball.
Logan lay there for a while, crying silently into his knees.
There were a few times where he was sure he had heard knocking, but over the sound of his rapidly thudding heart, he could never be sure.
He couldn’t muster up the willpower to check.
His shirt was too tight, it clung to him, his chest, and he knew that unfurling from his ball would bring attention to that fact.
And he wasn’t sure if he could manage that right now.
It must have been a few hours of lying awake on his mattress, the light from the window warming as it reached around midday, when there was another knock.
He had calmed down completely by this point, and therefore could clearly hear the specific rhythm of the sound.
Dun. dundundun. Dun.
That was their signal.
Logan let out a hum, stretching out over his now messy bedspread and unlocking the lock with a flick of his wrist.
The door creaked open and closed.
A cold hand caressed his face.
“Hey, Lolo. How’s my handsome nerd feelin’?”
Logan let his eyes flutter shut, leaning into the touch.
He was going to be alright.
He was safe now, away from judgement, and at that moment, neatly pressed clothes crumpled and tear tracks on his cheeks, that was enough.
---fic end---
notes: I hope that somebody enjoyed this at least, and at the end it's vague but it's intended to be Remus.
BIG props to you if you read all this, ily a lot lmao.
Comments are also VERY WELCOMED. I love them! Even if it's just a smiley, anything to know that you might've enjoyed it is a big boost!
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dallonm-archive · 3 years
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REVELATIONS, REVELATIONS | UPDATE #1
Hello y’all! I refuse to believe it’s been 3 and a half months since I last made an update post for this novel because time is not real :) whoops! This has actually been sat in my drafts for like a month though 
A rundown of things that happened: 
We have a new title! I already went into the meta and possible interpretations (it’s ~ambiguous~), so if you want you can read about that HERE.
I did 3 weeks of Nano and wrote 15k words! On the site I recorded 15053 but I think it was more 15.5k? I’ve edited the original doc now so idk but I’m v happy with that!
After that I took a break and a lot of Life Things happened re a certain pandemic that is taking :) all my motivation :) so I didn’t return to drafting until January. I also really struggled to progress with the story and decided the best thing was to revisit what I already had and work on that
It’s not that the original chapters weren’t working, I was just trying to understand the story for the first time and also Nano was such a hazy blur and I’m 99% sure November didn’t happen. I probably won’t revisit a section this intensely again until I’ve finished the draft but at this stage it really helped because the more I worked on it, the more I understood where it had to go next - I know the structure (for now), the basics for the middle and how the story ends :) hehe :) and I don’t think I’d had those revelations (aha) without revisiting this first part. I got to fall in love with the story all over again and I’m very happy with where it’s going!
This intro is already getting so long so I’m just going to jump straight into it because this update is LONG. I’m talking about all the chapters today even though not all of them are new, but since I’ve learnt a lot about them and this is officially update #1 post-nano, it makes sense to talk about all of them! I’m also going to do a new taglist because I see this as a new set of updates also I am awful at keeping up with taglists so! I’m just tagging friends who have already expressed interest + mutuals who I’m like 99% sure want to stay on so! please let me know if you’d like to be added or removed! 
@kowlazovdi​ @isherwoodj​ @avi-burton-writing​ @pamsdrabbles​ @ryns-ramblings​ @kitblogsthings​ @svpphicwrites​ @aetherwrites​ @radiomacbeth​ @bijouxs​ @writerlywonders​ @haldimilks​ @alicewestwater​ @piyawrites​ @coffeeandcalligraphy​ @shaelinwrites​
usual content warnings for religious trauma and cult discussion, specific CWs will come before excerpts!
So I’m currently working with four parts, and I’ve extended the timeline from one year to four years. This suits the story much better BUT pretty much everything here was written before that decision and I do not have the energy to restructure all of it right now :) Each part is split into two sections, one for each POV. So four parts, 8 sections, Felix and Dorothy get four sections each. I let the structure grow with the story but this one is working very well!
Also I started setting my pages to light green and it was LIFE CHANGING. Much kinder on the eyes and just looks so nice?? Calming?? This post is your sign to set your page colour to light green like LOOK
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So we have a prologue now!! The story made a lot more sense once I added this because originally the information we learn was just shoehorned into Chapter 1 in a flashback when really we needed to know this information going into it. That being said I struggled with this for a bit just because to justify a prologue I need that information to be conveyed in a way that is completely unique to the rest of the narrative so I didn’t want to just write this as a flashback. I ended up writing it in 2nd person and it came out in a way where it’s not clear which twins POV it is? Like it’s more of a fusion of both of them where neither of them have their own individual identity beyond “the twins” yet. I can’t tell if this is my funky POV peak or a clarity nightmare but I like it! I want it to only be ~500 words so we can take the risk.
In this they’re fourteen and they do a “blood pact” as a way to symbolically cut themselves from their family (aka: their father) whilst they’re still tethered to it. I really love it because not only is it exactly what these slightly unhinged-but-havent-tapped-into-it-yet, co-dependent-and-dont-realise-it kids would do but it immediately brings up the question of family and what family actually is. I’ve also realised a huge idea in this story is the idea of the tangible and for them, the concept of family and blood isn’t tangible so they struggle to recognise its significance (not that it. has any for them in the first place.) but their relationship, seeing each other bleed and pressing the cuts together is. The writing itself is kinda wonky because of the whole funky clarity nightmare POV but here’s a little taste of the ending:
cw: blood
You’ll slink back into your family room to clean and plaster each other’s hands and you’ll ask yourselves: which bloodstains came from who? Who bled the most and who stopped first? Who will come up with the story for the cuts on your palms and who will dispose the bloodied towel? Who is Dorothy without Felix and who is Felix without Dorothy?
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Shiny new first chapter! Originally this was in Dorothy’s POV but now it’s switched to Felix and instead of just showing their reunion (which turns out is....very anticlimactic and not appropriate for an opening lol??) we actually explore Felix’s thoughts an actions after he decides to escape the cult, which was a very impulsive decision and spans about a day and a half. This one is definitely gonna take a few drafts to get right because it’s such a delicate but intense event to write and I’m content with the fact that it’s not There Yet but the prose is! I had a lot of fun writing this chapter and it really helped me get back into the swing of loving this story. There’s something very delicate about it but also very troubling under the surface. The opening gave me a lot of trouble, but the first line hits!
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The day Felix decides to leave the sun glows the same, and the pine trees breathe the same, and the chapel cross stabs the sky the same. 
Ironically, a good chunk of the chapter happens outside the cult, as Felix decides to spend his final day taking Lola - a woman his age who is literally the only person he likes lmao - to one of the nearby towns. Whilst the main function of the chapter is to introduce the cult itself, it’s also to show how normalised leaving actually is - it’s just every time he’s left has been temporary, and every time he has left, he still feel separated from this “outside world”. They go to a candy store and a thrift store - where Felix lies about his mom (who he hasn’t seen in 20 years) being in hospital so he can use a phone :) Lola is a new character so I don’t have much to say on her, but all I can say is they are wlw and mlm solidarity but also she knows how to read him 
“I don’t know why Dotty and I loved this place so much - we always got  toothaches.”
“You’re leaving, aren’t you?”
“These apple ones are nice, but I think the lime is my favourite. Do you think the apple or the lime is nicer?”
“I think you’re leaving, but I also think you’re scared, so you’re pretending that I’m going to leave with you and that’s why you wanted to go to town. You chose the candy shop because this is where you went the first time you left, but this time you’re not coming back. Does that scare you, Fel?”
And here is my favourite paragraph in the whole chapter because <3 what the fuck <3 and if pine trees are a key Felix symbol no they aren’t 👁️ yes they are
cw: falling out a window? pushing yourself out a window? description of bones breaking
The day Felix decides the leave, when the clouds bleed amber, he pushes the scratched mahogany dresser so it lines with the windowsill, lies on top and hangs his head out. It’s never comfortable, but it’s always peaceful: sometimes cars murmur on nearby backroads, sometimes a wind chime flutters, sometimes brush rabbits rustle in shrubbery and they all breathe the same oxygen as him. He closes his eyes, inhales the pine air, and plays God: pushes himself further out, an inch at a time, until his shoulders cross the line and he wonders what bones would break if he fell. Would he break both arms or one, both legs or one? Would he break his spine? Which vertebra would crack, and how many? Would he feel them all in one big strike, or all the individual bones burst like popping candy? Evening breeze whispers against his face and he could do it right now, leap out the window and if he didn’t break his legs or back he could run to the bushes, to the pine trees, to the road, the town over East or West, the county line.
If Felix hit the ground, would it be because of a freak fall, or because he pushed himself out?
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We have to laugh because I’m pretty sure I said in my Nano update that this chapter was the strongest so far besides one scene but when I looked back that scene <3 took up 80% of the fucking chapter <3 So I just said fuck it I’ll rewrite the whole thing for fun!!!! And I love it!!! It’s so jarring compared to Chapter One and that’s the point!! Everything is so over saturated and originally that was just to convey the absolute shock Felix gets from the Major Impulsive Life Decision He Just Made, but now I think it’s intentional on his part and it goes back to the idea of the tangible: whilst he didn’t grow up totally isolated this is still a new life for him, and he has nothing to latch onto, so he looks to his surroundings and hyper-focuses and latches onto it because it’s something that’s now tangible and accessible to him so he sees it in this very bright, romanticised way (the romanticisation of San Francisco is very amusing to me but it’s also very relevant). But even with that he still distances himself from this environment still - the same way he did whilst living in the cult. He has no idea how he wants to exist in this world and he doesn’t even know how to exist yet.
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And so it became clockwork: eyes burst open at two, three, four in morning, doesn’t bother trying to fall back to sleep. Lurk into the kitchen, make a coffee or water or whiskey. Sit under the fritzing lightbulb with no shade, think about everything and nothing and everything and nothing. Or go for a smoke, inhale the vapours until it hurts his chest, breathe in the cool air until it hurts his teeth, wander around the block until it hurts his feet. Sneak back into a room that doesn’t belong to him in an apartment that doesn’t belong to him in a city that doesn’t belong to him. Count the bumps in the popcorn ceiling until footsteps sneak down the hall – Dorothy leaving a room that doesn’t belong to her. Join his sister back at the kitchen, she complains that they need to replace the lightbulb. Over pulpy orange juice and scrambled eggs on toast, she retells her dream and lists the possible meanings and he lists his plans for that day on how to immerse in the outside world, familiarise himself with the city until it belongs to him. Travel by trolley for the first time, eat seafood at the waterfront for the first time. Bump into a cherry-headed conure parrot by chance. Climb Twin Peaks and gaze at the new view of home. Trace the outline of translucent mountains in the air and pretend you’ll ever hike them; trace the outline of high rises in the air and pretend you know the people in them. He asks Dorothy when he’ll stop feeling like a tourist – she has no answer for him.
(context: Dorothy’s roommate, Jolie, is out of town at this point, so Dorothy tells Felix to take her room whilst she takes Jolie’s and they’ll sort it out later. Dorothy has no problem sleeping in Jolie’s bed because her and Jolie are Very Good Friends)
I also realised that, in the nicest way possible to November me, that this chapter was so damn boring because it’s very dialogue heavy but in every dialogue moment they are literally just 🧍 doing nothing. So I wrote a scene as a half-joke of Just Met Like Three Hours Ago Beau and Felix going to the arcade and it saved this chapter. It is SO fun but it also comes straight after this very emotionally intense moment and it’s really interesting to see that reach its zenith and then just. fizzle out but linger in the background? I love this scene but I also can’t take it too seriously because they play Frogger and @aetherwrites​ joked that the game’s a metaphor for Felix leaving the cult and I love her and hate her because she is so right I can picture the LIT1000 seminar where that analysis would be made unironically and it’d be ME who makes it and I am so close to just running with that for real. Also these two aren’t love at first sight but the chemistry is so loud like did you two meet today or have you been married for eight years and own five dogs together what’s the truth? Anyway here’s Felix murdering Beau on sight 
“You know, you could’ve warned me that you’d be that good,” Beau says.
“It’s not that difficult, you could’ve warned me that you’d be that bad.”
Beau leans across to shuffle through cassette tapes in the glove compartment. “I’m not, you just got lucky. I let you win.”
“But it’s not even competitive. You just died seven times in a row.”
I’m a little unsure of the pacing for this chapter now because its effectiveness lies in the fact it takes place a week after the previous, and my job with this section post-draft is to stretch it out longer since it only spans three weeks. I’m hoping I can make it work where there’s little time between Chapter 1 & 2 but still cover more time in chapters 3-5 because I think that’d be jarring in the best way? Like the absolute intensity of that initial week quickly dissolving and suddenly he’s been living this life for months he didn’t notice go by. Again <3 a problem for post draft me <3
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I don’t have much to say about this one because in Nano I didn’t even finish it, and now I have but it’s still <3 giving me trouble <3 - however I’ve realised this is probably the most important chapter at this stage of the novel because it’s the first full chapter with just the twins, trying to have a bonding moment and catch up but only learning that they a) love each other b) can’t stand each other whilst not realising just yet that they are c) extremely co-dependent. I like to call this novel multiple plot threads in a trench coat and that’s definitely it, the twins have their own individual plot threads separate to one another, but if there’s a central plot (and there kinda is?? its a surprise :) ) at its essence is them realising how fucked up their relationship is, but wanting to rectify that and trying to understand the difference between a tangled and toxic relationship. 
This chapter introduces that each character has a key symbol that’s attached to the world somehow and Felix has chapters like these in his arc where he tries to navigate the state of their relationship (so there’s one later on titled “Ocean (Beau)”) and his associations with them. We have to laugh here because I was really like “oh Dorothy is sapphic so I’ll make her obsessed with the moon” but then it became a major symbol in the story <3 Dorothy IS obsessed with the moon, and Felix is frustrated because he can’t see it the way she does and he feels like part of him is missing because of that, when it’s just a different perspective but nooo these two need to have unhealthy co-dependency and then get mad when they’re unhealthily co-dependent on each other :/ Anyway I’d just like to talk about how Felix’s need to be like his sister in this chapter is demonstrated through a symbol that’s attached way more to her than it is to him even though in the prose he describes the moon as this fragile, breakable thing which is the complete opposite as how Dorothy would and lets talk about the blade mirroring the prologue!!!!
He closed an eye and pointed the blade at the moon. If he could, it’d be so easy: surgeons precision, swift wrist flick, carved and plucked from the sky. Laid out on his palm like tissue paper, half translucent and as breakable as skin - a birthday present for Dorothy, if he doesn’t tear it. He’ll try not to, but it’d be so easy.
In further development of the Moon Imagery, I’ve started using a lot of Star Imagery with Felix and a lot of general space imagery in both of their POVs and I’m delighted to say I have no idea what the meta means with that but I like it!! It fits the story very well and they’re probably mirroring each other or something!
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This little chapter taught me that I need to be flexible with form <3 this was originally meant to be the final scene of the last chapter, and I was so hyped because it was one of the first scenes I conceptualised, but then it ~sucked~. However I didn’t realise until recently that it sucked because I was writing it in a traditional storytelling form - which most of this book benefits from, but this moment certainly does! not! I’m really glad because I think this book is the perfect playground for experimental form - although here it’s relatively simple though, most of the setup for this happens at the end of the previous chapter and then this is just all the information condensed as much as possible. This chapter is focused on memories so it really works for it to be cut off from the previous which is in the fictive present, and Felix’s perception of memories right now are ~a little jarring~
The final scene of Moon (Dotty) depicts Felix and Dorothy breaking into a park at 4am, promptly having an argument that results in Dorothy leaving, and Felix sat next to a fountain picking pennies out of it and trying to associate a memory with the year on the back - this chapter is those memories and this introduces the fluid relationship characters have with their past. For Felix, he’s seeing the last 20+ years from a bird eyes view in a very sporadic way and it’s starting to sink in that those 20+ years actually Happened. Some of the memories are very distanced, others are as intense as flashbacks, and some are a mixture of the two. This one is very interesting to me because he completely separates himself from the memory halfway through Fel do you wanna talk about this (unfortunately I cannot drop the name because of plot <3)
cw: light/implied homophobia
IN GOD WE TRUST / 1978
The first time Felix held a boys hand was in 1978 in the back pew at morning service. It was the first time [redacted]’s father preached and they got stuck in the back because they arrived late, because they laid in the grass together, wearing each other’s identical pecan coloured blazers as sunrise peeled back the night, and they slunk into the back of service like ghosts everyone could see and maybe they knew why they were late. [Redacted]’s father had a razor voice and he made sure every word sliced into his son and his son interlocked fingers with the boy next to him. His son didn’t look at the boy he held hands with the same way he’ll pretend his blazer is his and not the boys and the same way he didn’t look at the boy the first time they kissed behind the chapel building and the same way he didn’t look at the boy during Bible study for the week after.
Whilst I’d say in Chapter 2 the chemistry between Beau and Felix is as clear as day this is the first instance where Felix’s queerness is explicitly introduced and I’m taking this chance to say this book gets more queer every fucking week. Like I think in the last updates I was like ohhh sexuality doesn’t play much into Felix’s arc and know it’s like 99% of his damn arc and we LOVE it. But at this point he doesn’t realise like when I tell you guys this man is so repressed
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I am literally only putting this here because I talk about all the other chapters and it’s weird to me to leave one out. Also because the graphic and title is pretty. Not gonna lie I love making these posts and that is 10% to ramble about meta 90% making pretty graphics that is literally just cropping photos on Unsplash and putting Garamond text over them <3
Anyway this was originally Lessons in Holy and when I revisited that chapter I realised it was so fucking messy and I tried to fix it but it didn’t really work and I’ve been scared to touch it since. However the meta is top notch so here we are - it mirrors Chapter One, Everything Holy, which explores Felix’s decision to leave the cult and with that, leave God. Everything Holy / In San Francisco explores his relationship (or lack thereof) with God and how much Felix’s life has changed since he left - and how “holy” it is. It definitely goes back to the idea of the tangible because the holiness preached to him growing up was not something tangible to him, whereas with this he looks at real life experiences, so he tries to find holiness in that. It also ties with Cyan City and the romanticisation of San Francisco as something tangible and something he can find holiness in, which a) he needs to learn that things don’t have to be “holy” to be valuable and b) it would be a shame if :) he centred everything good about his life around SF and then :) something bad were to happen whilst living in SF :) the way he and Dorothy both do this
My plan for this is basically: Condense The Shit Out Of It. The hardest part about this chapter is it is very thematic and you know as a lit major (derogatory) I love that but with more theme centric chapters the line between subtle and Too Much can be verrryyy thin, but I think focusing on character exploration over theme will fix that pretty easily. I’d also like to separate the Isaias introduction into its own chapter because it’s such an important moment and November me just? Latched it on at the end? And that plus Felix’s crisis in the same chapter is just too much. This chapter is gonna get changed A Lot but for now here’s Felix’s very chill and relaxed ending to his POV section :)
cw: drowning, drug mention
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Felix didn’t speak to God for three weeks and everything unholy became holy: the coffee scorching his throat, the kaleidoscopic t-shirts and high waisted jeans, the punk rock they play at the record store – loud and electric. It’s unholy, but he sleeps through the night now, he folds coloured card into butterflies at breakfast and scribbles biro eyes over the newspaper's sudoku on his lunch break. He earns money and he spends a pinch of it on himself: on new wave records and playing cards and earrings he can’t wear yet. Sometimes he buys marijuana it’s not a sin because marijuana means he only smokes tobacco twice a day now – one at breakfast, one before bed. He bar hops with Beau on Saturdays and hikes with Dorothy on Sundays and he tells strangers he studies American Literature and he smiles with his eyes more and nobody notices that somebody’s holding his head underwater. And he doesn’t know whose hand it is, but it knows how to grip tight. And he doesn’t know how to swim, but he knows how to swallow water. And he doesn’t know if this is the punishment or the sin because the water stings his eyes but he chooses to keep them open, and the water will tangle in his lungs but he chooses to keep his mouth open. And hellfire can’t touch him under here, so he’ll keep swallowing water and it’ll burn him in a different way, and he’ll like how it scorches his throat.
(Once again context I didn’t share because I don’t like the writing that talks about it: Felix has a deep fear of drowning from past trauma, but he’s also very obsessive about it and often imagines himself drowning.)
(also the way these excerpts are just showing off my love for repetition my Intro to Creative Writing Tutor that called repetition lazy is seething rn!!!!)
Overall though, I’m v happy with how this section came out now that I actually know what the story is! As I’ve finished drafting it, I have noticed where the missing plot beats are and this is what I expected because I Do Not have a lot of experience with novels (I’ve never passed 15k on a novel before so we’re in new territory now) and generally struggle to see beats before I finish a draft. I’m thinking there’s at least one chapter missing and maybe a shorter one, like MSATBOTF, but I won’t be touching this section again until I finish the draft. Most of all I learnt a lot about the story’s form and I’m excited to play with that and be a bit more flexible! 
I’m currently drafting Indigo, the first chapter in Dorothy’s POV, and I was going to talk more about it but this post is too long and the next update will be <3 all about her <3. But the chapter introduces her and Jolie’s tumultuous relationship and here’s a lil peak! 
Me, a sapphic, capable of writing happy sapphic relationships: 
Me instead: 
cw: light/implied homophobia
If she didn’t display the ticket on the bedside table - like she had something to prove - she could have easily been in Dallas, in New York, London, Cannes, Moscow, Tokyo, Cairo, Sydney. But wherever she went, Dorothy and Jolie have had four airport reunions before today - four times they’ve had to soften themselves, disguise themselves. Old high school friend flying in to be her maid of honour, college roommates who don’t see each other as a day past eighteen, pen pals reuniting for the first time since the seventies, business trip colleagues in casualwear. The fifth time, there’s nothing to hide, and as they walk to the car, Dorothy has to wonder: if they were seen by nobody, would Jolie have hugged her with both arms? Would she have kissed her? Would Dorothy kiss back?
I’m midway through this chapter, so I’ll keep the rest of it for the next update! That I promise won’t be in three months!
If you read through all of this then I am in love with you <3 
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