#and all of a sudden i lost my job. then got a new job bc ?? someone just recommended me

[jrueships]

im going into my new work tomorrow, first time ever😐

[shouty-mcnubbs]

can someone PLEASE explain to me how life keeps happening to me in the wildest possible ways and yet i just sit here....... i didnt do any work to get to the place i am and somehow life happens. ... ........

[stsgooo]

What Once Was.

✩࿐ summary: you had numerous problems, but resting at number one was geto suguru.

warning(s): lovers to enemies to lovers(?), self-indulgent on a nuclear level, reader is kinda obsessed with geto, unrequited requited love, cult leader geto things, semi-jealous fem!gojo, SMUT MDNI. wc; 13.8k

pairing(s): fem!geto/fem!reader, (slight, slight, slight) fem!gojo/fem!reader.

a/n: hello hello everyone!! first of all, i'd like to apologize for my month long absence from writing. i got covid and then i lost, like, all motivation for writing. but im back now so yipppeee! secondly, happy new year!! (23 days later) happy for this to be my first fic of 2024. anyway, i always see wacuoms art on here and twitter and fem!geto makes my brain go brrr SO i drummed up this silly thing based on that specific art piece. you should definitely check out their art bc it’s so beautiful and just AH!!

m.list ao3

ADMITTEDLY, YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH HER HAD NEVER BEEN… RIGHT, TO SAY THE LEAST.

Even in highschool, you’d clung to her like she was a life raft in the middle of the ocean, the only thing keeping you from floating away, the only thing keeping you from drowning. Neither of you had really acknowledged it back then. Much too focused on fighting curses and just fooling around to truly place any type of label on things. It was peaceful then. Both of you are untouched by the horrors that would come.

Then she had rushed off with Gojo on that Star Plasma Vessel mission, beaming and promising she’d be back before you knew it. Only to return with a bloodied chest and sunken eyes as she proclaimed the girl was dead.

Then she hadn’t returned from that mission. She killed 112 people, vanishing into thin air. Leaving Gojo (and you) to clean up the pieces of her sudden and brutal departure.

Back then, you’d only held contempt for her.

From the moment Yaga had pulled you aside during training with a fourth year, looking you in the eyes, and uttered read this, you felt rage. You felt a never ending, unsettled rage that sparked deep within your gut and dared to set aflame those around you.

Five days after departure. 112 dead. Village left in ruins. Home empty, but residuals indicate murder.

Geto Suguru. Sentenced to death.

Finality of her fate for the rest of time was printed on a piece of paper and passed around jujutsu society like wildfire. Always to be a defector. Always to be a murderer. Long forgotten was the girl who used to curl up against you, uttering her worries into your back. The girl who would shyly offer her help whenever you were particularly stumped. Gone was the girl who had offered something different and true to you. Now, a murderer.

A murderer. The girl who had always said death needed to be justified, that things needed reason, was the very same that killed 112 people and promised to kill more. A murderer.

You never quite got used to people associating everything horrible with her. The updates you’d hear as your school life came to an end. Whispers of her wrong doings just never matched with the face and person you had known.

It messed you up for a long time. Her betrayal. Your relationships slowly dwindled away as you fell reclusive. Faces that you used to greet daily, grew further away. Your graduation was met with little fanfare. In fact, you’d only received a voicemail from Shoko informing you that it was over and done while you were on a mission. You drowned all the negativity and the hatred down with work. Quickly assuming your role as a “powerful sorcerer”. A joke, in your books. You’d never been as powerful as the others. Never as useful.

Her defection made you feel selfish.

There was an extreme amount of anger and frustration that you took out on others when it was all pinned on her. Burned some bridges between you and few. Most notably, you and Gojo. Both of you had been pent up with the rage of the betrayal and things had been said. It was almost easy to leave her one and only. To take a job at Kyoto and completely leave Tokyo behind like a nasty stain on your favorite sweater.

What was once home and family, was nothing more than a horrible reminder of what once was.

Time moved on. Life took you different places and you met new people. You matured more and you worked towards trying to appear more stable.

But she always lingered in the back of your mind.

Gojo, when the both of you were still on speaking terms, had brazenly described her as a breath of fresh air. The last bit of blue spring. A beautiful luminous skyline that kept you captivated. Words all so flippant and nonchalant as if it were fact that couldn’t be contested or questioned.

You agreed.

But, at the same time, you’d seen her in a different light.

She’d always been the setting sun. Something that would go away, no matter how much you begged for its light to hold out a little longer. Something that would display the most beautiful things, showcase art that no other could obtain, then so ruthlessly take it away. No matter how much you reached out for it, it’d never been within your grasp. When you thought of sunsets, you thought of her.

When you saw certain hair ties displayed in shops, you thought of her.

When you lay alone in the middle of the bed, you thought of her— butting her way in, her long legs tangling with your own as she claimed you hogged all of it to keep her close.

When you saw, you thought of her. You saw a lot. You thought a lot.

Shamefully, you thought of her a lot, even after eight years.

At 24, you’re supposed to be better.

Everyone seemed to figure it all out. How to avoid the topic of her. How to move on so quickly. How to avoid talking about the sorcerer from their class, their school, their group that snapped and went on a spree. How to avoid giving updates when the higher-ups are a little desperate for someone to go out and find her, to finally put a stop to her.

Everyone but you.

Your avoidance, your loophole from thinking about her, was to simply diminish her to her. Nothing else. Nothing less, nothing more. Just her. No name. No face. Nothing.

She’d left you. She never said goodbye to you. She told Shoko and Gojo goodbye. Went out and found them. But not you. She didn’t want to see you. She didn’t feel the same as you did. All of the things you reminded yourself to keep you sane, from thinking about her with rose tinted glasses.

It was easier that way. You’d been doing good at it too. No longer your friend. No longer the girl you might’ve felt more for. No longer the strongest. No longer a sorcerer. Just her.

Well, until you received this mission.

The higher-ups had called you to Tokyo and you instantly knew it wouldn’t be anything good. Finding yourself in the middle of a dimly lit room, they offered not any ‘hi’s, ‘hello’s, or ‘good morning’s. They’d opened with, Gojo Satoru is no longer in the country and we have something of great importance to be dealt with.

Promising. Not at all threatening, right?

No way.

If they couldn’t even have Gojo Satoru present in the country for this, it was definitely something they didn’t want her finding out about. Something that she’d definitely hunt you down and kill you over if it was something insanely extreme.

Despite your inner reassurances, you knew it was something you wouldn’t like either.

Still, you couldn’t outright say no. You weren’t as strong, you weren’t as brilliant, or as cunning, or important as Gojo. You were just… you. A girl from a far off village who was lucky to be born like this, to be found when she had. To see what you could see. You’d always been plain.

You were in no place to decline.

What exactly do you want done? You had asked with trepidation, sensing something heavy in the air.

What they said next hadn’t ever crossed your mind.

One of Geto Suguru’s members has been seen scoping out the area where a Special Grade curse has been reported. We’re under the impression that she’ll be going to the area within the next two days to claim it. We’d like for you to take this chance and execute her.

The moment the name left the old man’s mouth, three years of your youth burst through your mind like a raid. Blissful times. Happier times. Before everything. When she used to tuck your hair behind your ear. When her eyes would be bright and jovial as you explained something childish to her. When she would utter your name against your skin and press the most delicate of kisses against you. When Suguru—

Your world crumbled the instant the name filled your mind.

You’d broken your streak. Of not saying her name.

It’s probably why you didn’t hesitate to agree. As her name repeated in your mind— Suguru. Suguru. Suguru. Suguru. All the wonderful and beautiful things that accompanied a name as sweet as hers. Ignoring the fact that you, when the moment came and the day called for it, would never be able to harm her. Much less execute her. You agreed.

They appeared relieved. As they thanked you for your time, for your cooperation. They promised you that you would be doing the world a service.

You were not so convinced as you bowed, then took your leave. Instead, you couldn’t help the burst of unnerving giddiness that waved over you.

It wasn’t long after you got home that you received an email including files upon files of information you’d have to stuff in your mind before going to the location. Long droning essays on the curse residing in the area, the area itself, and the type of person that had been nervously traipsing around a specific building taking notes. It didn’t really interest you, nor did you really take any of it seriously. A single photo of the person staking out the area appeared to be a young man, red cheeks, and wide eyes. He looked no older than 20.

It was well into the night, your fourth cup of some bottle of alcohol that's been sitting on your shelf for years, when you opened a file and saw her.

The first thing that caught your eye was the photo at the top. The picture was shitty. Grainy and taken from a distance, as if the photographer was in the midst of a large crowd, barely tall enough to get something decent. But it was enough to make your body lock up and your eyes to take in every detail of her endlessly.

She was older, much like you, her hair much longer, now adorned in a half bun with a single bang sculpting the right side of her face— much like how it would rest in your teen years. It appeared that she still had her gauges in, possibly a larger size than the last you saw of her. New piercings appeared to adorn her face, just above her eyebrow and on her bottom lip, a single ring on the right. She was just so… her. If it weren’t for the large robes that seemed to swallow her whole, making her appear small and approachable, you would’ve convinced yourself it was still your Suguru.

You read over the information gathered about her carefully. With much more attention than you had given to the special grade and skittish curse user before her. The file was filled to the brim with things she’d been up to for the past eight years—there were gaps here and there about what she’d been doing exactly, but you got the jist that none of it was necessarily good.

Almost immediately after her defection, she’d taken over the Star Religious Group. Something that brought you pause. You’d heard that name uttered here and there when you were younger. Especially from Suguru herself. As she got that hollow look in her eyes, staring distantly, she’d told you that the applause was neverending. When you asked who, she said them. The group. It made you wonder what could possibly possess her to take over the group and create it into— well, more of a cult. The information about it was far and few. Mostly detailed information about it was Suguru’s punishment for those she believed weren’t exactly useful, they most likely ended up dead and disfigured.

It appeared that most of her followers were either men hoping for some type of attention from her, women who were the same and willing to do more, or those who truly believed in whatever deranged thing she was passing around. There was a quite a list of men that had crossed some figurative line and detailed torture they endured because of their crimes in Suguru’s eyes— you didn’t let it sway you as you, wholeheartedly, believed they probably deserved it.

Another section detailed that she had a subgroup called “The Family”.

You were ashamed to acknowledge the heavy feeling in your chest. As you read about the members that were known— a man from Africa, a woman from Hokkaido, a blonde man of unknown origins— two girls. It seemed that this was something that caught the attention of not only you, but the higher-ups too. There wasn’t much information, but they seemed desperate to find some weakness with the woman. These two seemed to be it.

13 years-old, have not attended any schools, unknown birth origins, unknown curse technique. It seemed that Suguru had done good in keeping them secret, despite them being semi-known within the people that mattered.

Your heart beats erratically against your chest, your tongue darting out to moisten your lips. It’d been so long since you saw her. Not even a glimpse at a picture. You wished… Hell fucking no. You’re not doing this again. You’re not falling down this rabbit hole again.

Still, your heart ached. She had time for this family. She could tell Shoko and Gojo goodbye. But she never sought you—

You closed the tab instantly once the thought entered your mind. Downed the rest of your cup and pressed your fingers against your eyes, drawing in a shaky breath. All that time since you saw her. The amount of time since you stuffered all those pictures into the back of your attic, telling yourself you were done. The higher-ups ruin it for a botched execution.

It was in that moment, that you promised to exorcize the curse before she could ever get there.

An easy in and out. A fool proof plan that you drummed up drunk off your ass, and trying not to think about the teenaged you who would scoff at you now. You imagined her, happier and awestruck by a girl with a dazzling smile and heart of gold, standing over you and asking how you could possibly end up like this. When you and that girl of gold had promised an eternity of fighting curses together. She would be disappointed. As you were.

You decided, for the teenage versions of yourselves, you wouldn’t kill her. No, it couldn’t be you. Instead, you’d give her a sign. You’d kill that curse and it’d be a clear cut you’re being watched. She’d take the hint.

There had been a reason Suguru, red faced and teary eyed, had banned you from making plans in high school.

You arrived at the abandoned complex at 7PM.

After a long day of traveling, you were almost emotional to see it. But you knew what it meant as you stepped through the door. Another exhaustive fight that would leave you passed out on the train and the higher-ups giving you a lashing for failing so badly.

Your steps were light as you judged the area. It seemed abandoned and you didn’t see or feel any disturbances. Everything seemed in order. You whistled softly as you walked through the halls, searching each moldy and deteriorated room with the interest of a grandfather. It didn’t appear that there was any curse lingering. You were almost convinced you had the wrong address when you felt it.

It was something you didn’t acknowledge at first. Just as you approached the last step of the 12th floor. You felt this weight lift off your shoulders and you sighed contentedly. In an instant, everything felt okay. Like you weren’t about to have a quarter life crisis once this was done and over with. You pushed some of your hair back and just let your eyes droop as if a soothing lullaby was egging you into slumber. Bliss.

A beat.

Bliss, you realized with a shudder, was the last thing you should be feeling.

You felt a tug behind you. Last second, you whirled around to meet the eyes of the curse.

It was plump and red, an array of eyes staring at you alone. It almost resembled a strawberry as it floated feet in front of you. But its touch was not delicate or sweet, landing a hard ruthless blow in your gut that sent you flying back. Straight through an opposite wall and into one of the many abandoned apartments.

For a moment, all you could do was stare up at the ceiling with your ears ringing and head aching. You asked yourself, what the fuck am I doing? You should’ve told them to fuck off. Told them that you were not going to get yourself mixed up with whatever fucked ass shit Suguru was doing. You were done. You should’ve been more assertive.

But you were a coward.

You cursed to yourself as you dragged a languid hand up to your face. Pulling back to stare at the blood coating your fingers with a heavy sigh. You pushed yourself into a sitting position, swaying in your spot as your head grew dizzy. It didn’t take you long for you to realize your RCT wasn’t working. In fact, you had little to no cursed energy at the moment. An odd sensation of emptiness filled you with anxiety and you were suddenly reminded of what you read right before you saw her picture last night.

Along with the feelings of bliss, this curse can drain cursed energy from the user. Proceed with caution.

Maybe their true plan was to kill you all along. Who would even care?

Shoko could be semi-shocked, maybe. You hadn’t talked to her in years and the shock would primarily be rooted in the ‘wow, I haven’t heard from her in years. That’s awfully sad.’ way. In the best case scenario, she could show off your liver to an awfully curious student who wanted to know what alcoholism does to the body.

Nanami, possibly the only person that you kept contact with (which was only texts on holidays and whenever you had a question about locations), would say it was a shame and move on as if it was a bad game of football he lost a bet on.

Utahime would only cry because death is sad. And she would prattle on about how she knew you and could have possibly done something, if only she had known the job they were sending you on. In true Utahime fashion.

And Gojo.

Well, Satoru would probably roll her eyes and say something along the lines of— Go figure she’d die because of her own ignorance. Then make a poorly timed joke about your demise that would only get protests out of some faux respect for you.

It wasn’t nice. Or entirely comforting. Nor did you bring tears to your eyes. It was just your reality. Something you had accepted the moment you’d walked away from those you’d known.

It was just reality.

The strawberry-like curse was about to break through, with you accepting your death wholeheartedly, the hole in the wall when a loud roar vibrated off the walls to the right of the corridor. Both you and the curse had no time to process anything when a flash of something pounced by. The strawberry-like curse was suddenly out of your view with a loud screech. You could hear it fight against something, making feeble noises as they seemed to struggle against one another, but you couldn’t see anything except for the sudden pink mist filling the air. A last ditch effort at defending itself. But the thing that attacked it didn’t seem to care as it continued to growl.

You dared to inch closer to the hole and peek out.

Over the strawberry-like curse, tearing it to shreds, was a cat-like curse. Big. Much bigger than the other curse and definitely bigger than you. Huge talons coated in purple goop, pointed black ears, pure white coat, with purple and black swirls all around its torso. It looked vicious and you were suddenly worried that this was the true curse Suguru was after. Much better than a horny strawberry curse. Much more powerful too.

“Shame, I really was going to use that.”

It’s been eight years, four months, 16 days, and 30 hours since you last heard her voice. The last you had heard of her was a week before Yaga told you of her defection. She’d shown up at your door, black hair loose from its usual prim and proper updo, she asked if she could come in. You accepted without hesitation. She laid with you silently before she asked a question you thought about often: Do you ever see yourself being something other than a sorcerer? Back then, you hadn’t thought about it before you told her no. You told her that you were happy to continue doing this— it was what you loved. She stared at you long and hard that night. Then uttered that you were right.

The next day, Haibara Yu was killed.

Bitterly, you realized it hadn’t changed at all. Still sweet, still thick like honey, a trap for you to stumble and get stuck in. To cherish until the moment you perished.

You felt sick to your stomach as you refused to look over at her. You hadn’t heard her approach. Didn’t even sense anything, but that definitely had to do with the curse’s mist. She managed to sneak inside and now she was only feet away from you. You could feel her gaze. You had always been able to tell when she was looking, when she was prying open your head and trying to take a peek. It always made you feel hot all over, a tightness in your abdomen and a burn against your cheeks.

Now, it makes you queasy. Makes you sweat and shiver, goosebumps littering your skin.

“You know, people usually say thank you after you save their life.” She continued on as if this wasn’t hard. As if it wasn’t you and it wasn’t her standing in this abandoned building while a curse— her curse— devoured another. “But I suppose you were never one for manners.”

Is your lack of manners all natural or do you have to work extra hard to be like this? Suguru used to tease you after you were particularly difficult on a mission. Bumping hips with you, hand brushing against yours, eyes half crescents as she smiled. Her. Her. Beautiful.

She had been everything.

She’d been the one you sought out when you were much too jumbled for anything or anyone else. Been the first you opened up to, spilling all your secrets and worries into her ear. Been the first to hear it all and to touch you delicately, to embrace you so tenderly that you believed you were everything horrible.

She had been love.

But that was before she became a mass murderer. Before she promised a world without non-sorcerers. Before she had left you in the dust without so much as a glance. Before everything. That was your reality now.

You clenched your jaw, head tilted down as you weighed your options.

The cat curse was in the way of the exit, still devouring the other in a ruthless onset of hunger. You wouldn’t be able to get through it without your cursed energy, which you could only just start to feel slowly returning. She was blocking the hallway that led to the fire escape. Probably a deliberate choice and she probably wanted to attack you with these lack of escape routes she’d given.

The only option was the window behind you.

To jump and free fall from the 12th floor, then book it, hoping to get away fast enough. Your only hope was that you landed and didn’t break anything.

Your foot shifted, getting prepared to book it, when she spoke again and, effectively, stopped you.

“I wasn’t going to come today, but one of my people said they saw you, and…. Well, I’ll admit, I was a tad curious.”

Your ears rang.

She had come… specifically for you? She wasn’t even going to get this shit, but you had been there, and she came?

A part of you dared to grow hopeful. A part of you that you’ve tried to push down and ignore for almost a decade. A part of you that was insane and thought insane things. Dreamt of things that could never be. It was the side that was absolutely obsessed with her. The side that just wanted to consume her whole and for you both to become one. One side that would something wish you were a curse that she could swallow and summon at will. Your mind was soaring with wild things. Crazy things.

You tried to focus on something else. Like the fact that she regarded this as a purely curious endeavor. Curiosity was an interesting choice of word. You could be curious about anything. Like the sun and the moon. Or a bug. This situation felt more like a bug. Like she was holding a magnifying glass and watching your movements, adding pressure to you, seeing what you could handle. Next, she’d hold out the glass to the sun and scorch you alive.

In your state, you’d probably thank her.

You could see her shift in the corner of your eye, she drew closer to you, and you could just barely make out the end of her robes.

“Are you not even going to look at me?” She dared to sound sad. To sound a little teasing.

You were convinced that if you looked at her, you’d be blinded. That you could never possibly look away again. That you’d plead and beg for things she’d never give you.

She sighed something heavy, “You’re angry.”

Angry? You wanted to say, instead clenching your hands at your sides, I’m downright murderous.

You’re angry you’re even here.

You’re angry that the higher-ups believed you could do this.

You’re angry that Gojo didn’t dare to even try.

You’re angry that you can pick out her soft fruity perfume as it fills the air.

You’re angry that your heart still beats wildly at her mere presence.

You’re so fucking angry that she can stand there and talk to you like it was nothing. That it hadn’t been eight years. That you hadn’t been forced to suffer alone without her.

Yeah, you’re angry.

Your eyes snapped away as the cat curse purred, making its way back down the hallway. You took a step back from the hole, fearful it’s pounce on you next. However, it kept walking, until it was by her side. You watched as it rubbed its face against her side, purring and mewling softly as she delicately ran her fingers through its fur. Her hands were bigger than you remember. Her long fingers carded through the fur gently, black painted nails a stark contrast to the white of the beast.

“I’m not going to fight you….” Yet, remained unspoken. It appeared to be completely up to you on whether or not you two would end up in a brawl. “I’m just here for a chat.”

“I don’t want to talk to you.” You spoke before you could think, before you could stop yourself.

She seemed to pause. Her hand froze momentarily in the fur, before it shakily began once more. “I knew you were angry.”

That only pissed you off more.

“Angry? Of course I’m angry! Here you are, after eight years, just popping in like it’s fucking nothing. Like this isn’t the cruelest thing you’ve ever done.” You retorted, your hands clenched tight at your sides as you deliberately stared at her tabi clad sandal covered feet. You couldn’t look her in the eye. You couldn’t see her face. It’d be over. You couldn’t.

She faltered once against, then seemed to take her chances, taking a step towards you. “I wanted to see you.”

Eight years too late. You thought.

You scoffed, jaw clenched, “Yeah, right, you didn’t want to see me eight years ago, why would you want to see me now?”

“Eight years ago—?”

“You went to everyone that mattered and said goodbye. You explained yourself to them and then you vanished. But there wasn’t a goddamn word for me?” You felt pent up anger and sadness from over the years conjured up once more. Nights you had spent curled up alone in bed after her defection, staring into the darkness, while the endless string of thoughts about your value and worth replayed in your head. It crushed you. The reality of it all. “Me? It told me exactly what I meant to you.”

“I wasn’t—”

“I cared about you much more than you ever cared about me. It was always you and Gojo, I just butt my way in.” You continued in an overflow of thoughts that you never dared to speak aloud. You figured, if this was the last time you saw each other, then you’d lay it all out. “I just wanted you to say something, but it made me open my eyes when you didn’t say a word. I learned my lesson.”

A beat.

“Really?” Her tone is flat, almost sarcastic as she regards you. “And what was that lesson?”

“Don’t assume your place in someone’s life.”

There was a prolonged silence between you both and you thought that she just might walk away. But you were pleasantly surprised when she chuckled. A deep and low sound that echoed off the walls and converged back on you. Goosebumps formed on your arms and there was a distinct shiver down your back.

“You don’t change, do you?” Her voice is thick with amusement and something oddly unidentifiable mixed in there.

You’re unable to answer. Had you really remained the same after all these years?

Suddenly, you’re broken from your thoughts as warm and soft hands slip to either side of your face, pulling your head upwards and you finally make eye contact with her for the first time.

The light brown warm and welcoming, an old home that called to you now as you stared at her with wide eyes. The bags that had tainted her under eye those years ago were non-existent now. Instead, wrinkles at the corner of her eyes adorned her features. You were half tempted to reach out and trace them, take them into your memory.

A sickness fills your gut as you take her in completely.

The blurry picture some informant took didn’t do her justice. It didn’t capture the warmth of her eyes, or the spread of her lips, the charming nature of it all. She looks better, healthier, than she had when you last saw her. Cheeks are full when they used to be sunken, fingers and arms no longer boney as they once were, she filled her clothes now, surely. Your eyes take in the new piercings that litter her face now. Two on her bottom lip, three on both of the upper lobes of her eyes. Her hair was longer and appeared to be silk like, still tied up in a half up bun, it was almost too familiar. The only thing that was different was the sharp smirk on her lips and her clothes.

Heavy robes, almost that of a monk, that seemed to swallow her large frame whole. The only place that seemed to be strained was her upper breasts, cleavage peeking from the fabric. Something that would surely bring shame to other monks, but pleasure to you.

Your little mass murdering ex.

“Ah,” Suguru breathed, eyes brightening considerably when you seemed to completely take her in, “Long time no see.”

You wanted to keel over right there. To fall to the ground and have your soul float upwards into oblivion. You might just die happy.

“....Suguru…” Your hand shakily wraps around her wrist, clutching onto her tightly.

Her eyes are almost manic, staring down at you as her fingers gently stroke against your cheek. “You think I didn’t see you because I didn’t care about you? You’re an idiot.” Her words are slow and deliberate, a tone that you would use on a petulant child. The tips of her nails dug into your cheeks as she squeezed them together, jerking your forward. You’re so close that you feel her hot breath fan across your skin. So close you could smell the faint scent of the mints she’d pop whenever she’d absorb a curse. It was dangerous to be so close, to be so vulnerable and under her touch. But you couldn’t pull away now, not waiting all this time just to see her. “I did everything I did because I do care about you.”

Your mind draws blank as your hold on her slackens, “You do…?” You whisper, words jumbled by the press of your cheeks.

Her eyes bounce from your own to your puckered lips, something dark residing deep within her soft hued irises. “You calling me a liar?” She loomed over you now, your back straining to keep her in your line of sight.

“I don’t know you anymore, Suguru— it’s been eight years. You’ve killed people, innocent people.” You attempt to keep your voice concise and level. To be the voice of reason in this mind numbing situation. But you can tell by her expression that you didn’t help.

She looks unimpressed, maybe even disgusted, by your words. “Innocent? They’re all as innocent as the serpent tempting Eve.” She drew you even closer, your breasts pressing against her own, the soft flesh smashed between the both of you. Her manic expression only grows more feral as she stares down at you. “They all have blood on their hands and they’re allowed to walk around without knowing what they’ve done. The amount of sorcerers that’ll die just for them to remain ignorant. Never having to know the kids, the people, that their emotions have killed. Those monkeys—”

In an instant, you were glaring up at her, “I didn’t come here to talk about your insane fucking ideals, Suguru! Now, either talk like a normal sane person, or this is done.”

She faltered.

She had the gall to look caught off guard, before masking her expression with a kind grin. She pulled away from you, her nails leaving deep red crescents in your skin. It almost burned, but your heart beating against your ears (and between your legs), distracted you from the gentle pain.

Suguru tucked her hands into her sleeves, her eyes closing as she bowed respectfully. “I apologize. I can get rather carried away with my thoughts.” The sudden shift in tone and the air was almost whiplash. It was crazy to see how easily she could go from crazed excited rage to this respectable monk offering her sincere apologies. It made your head spin. “I don’t mean to anger you.”

You eyed her for a long moment. Watched the way she kept her position. She didn’t falter or twitch. Just remained bowed.

“Why are we here?”

“I assumed you were sent here to execute me.”

With the nail hit on the head, you tensed.

This only dragged a scoff from her, a twinge of bitter amusement there. “Rather foolish on their part— thinking you of all people would kill me.”

It felt like a jab on your abilities. It was definitely a jab on your abilities.

“I could.” You childishly retort.

Suguru’s pierced brow raises, a twinkle in her eye that you could identify from your teenage years, “You could? Really?” She repeated, and it sounded terribly incredulous. “You’ve just had your cursed technique— which you could barely do anything with the last time we saw each other, by the way— leached away by a curse. You’re horribly banged up. I don’t think you could throw a straight punch even if you wanted.”

“I could kill you, if I really wanted— but I don’t do shit just because someone says so.”

There’s a long moment of silence before Suguru laughed.

She laughed and laughed. She laughed loudly. Hard enough that her head was thrown back, eyes closed. Her chest heaved as her arms wrapped around her midriff. The sound was wheezy and sharp, would’ve been mocking if it weren’t for the familiarity of it.

A sound that you hadn’t realized you missed until this very moment.

It was a heavy realization. Just how much you missed Suguru.

The tiniest of things that you had taken for granted as a child. Her laughs, her smiles, the little twitch in her hands whenever she wanted to do something, but hesitated. It made you think about all the things you had missed that year. The frowns and the distance in her eyes— the amount of times you had asked what’s wrong and let her slip by with a simple nothing too important. There were many things you should’ve done in order to hold onto and cherish those little things you once loved dearly.

You resisted the overwhelming urge to cry as you clenched your jaw, swallowing down any of the tears. You wouldn’t do this. Not here. Not in front of her.

“You really haven’t changed,” Suguru said breathlessly, calming down from her laughing fit to address you once again. “It warms my heart— to see you untouched by time.”

Untouched.

Untouched.

Untouched?

You were, arguably, one of the most touched people by the slut of time. You had suffered and agonized every day for years. To say you were unchanged, untouched, it was almost like her spitting in your face.

“Then you don’t know me.” You flatly reply.

Her amused expression falters. “Hm?”

“These have been the worst eight years of my life. The amount of shit I’ve been through to even be talking to you now— it’s been insufferable. I have changed. A lot. I have changed in ways that I didn’t even know were possible and it’s been the worst experience.” There was a spark of rage in you as you reached out and pushed her back. She didn’t move to stop you, but she didn’t even stumble at your ‘attack’. She just stared and stared. “Just because you couldn’t, what— stop being angry? News flash, Suguru, we’re all pissed off at the world, but we can’t do anything about it!”

“You could,” Suguru said quietly after a moment’s pause, “Any of us could do something about it. There’s just no opportunity from that place. They restrict you, put you in a box.”

If anyone hadn’t changed, it was Suguru. Who appeared and sounded like she was just as self assured as she was eight years ago.

Instead of arguing over something you know neither of you would budge on, you turned towards the stairs.

Your swift exit would be the best option. There was nothing to be said, nothing to be passed between the both of you that would change the fact that Suguru was sentenced to death— and you were left behind. The realization made you sigh softly through your nose, dragging your feet as you walked away. She made no move to stop you, not even asking what you were doing, it seemed you both agreed—

“I didn’t seek you out because I knew you couldn’t handle it.”

Her words made you pause once again.

You faltered in your step and your eyes were unwavering as they peeked at her from over your shoulder. Her head was held high, face unmoved, but her eyes… her eyes carried something heavier.

“Huh..?” You uttered.

Suguru took a deep breath, “I knew that if I told you goodbye, you would’ve done something stupid, like try to convince me to come back or say that it was a mistake. O-Or you would’ve thought that you could’ve done something to stop me.” I still thought that. I still believe that. I still imagine myself finding you and dragging your stubborn ass back. “I didn’t say goodbye because I thought…. Well, I thought it was a mercy.”

“A mercy?” You frown heavily at her, “A mercy from what?”

“From heartbreak.”

There was a moment of silence between you two that you dragged on for three minutes.

A mercy from heartbreak.

It almost made you laugh. How absurd the notion was— that her not speaking a word to you somehow spared you from any pain. That you wouldn’t feel the effects of her sudden disappearance just because she didn’t speak to you. It was an optimistic view on it. It was too hopeful. It was selfish.

So you just sharply laughed.

The sound was so sudden that you were almost tempted to jump. As Suguru does, blinking at you to stare at you with vague curiosity. You hadn't expected it yourself. It wasn’t a planned action, nor did you have any opportunity to stop yourself. It just happened. As abruptly and sudden as this situation.

Suguru’s thin brow raised, “What’s so funny?”

“You,” Was the immediate reply as you recovered, taking deep breaths, “Just…. A mercy. You’ve always been so interesting, Suguru. Your concept of sparing me from all those nasty feelings is so..”

“So what?” Suguru’s voice is flat as she regards you, seemingly unamused by this sudden shift in mood from you.

You shoot her a look, “Naive.”

“Naive?”

“Terribly. The fact that you genuinely believe I would’ve rather not heard from you at all to save myself the heartbreak is naive, Suguru.”

Her nose scrunched. “I was sparing you—“

You scoffed, “Sparing me? What am I, some-some damsel in need of saving?”

“A conversation wouldn’t have changed anything.”

“All I wanted was you to say goodbye.”

“You would’ve been devastated—“

“I was devastated when you didn’t even see me!” You reached out and slapped her shoulder. She remained unmoved. Not surprising given her wide stature and statue-like physique. “Do you know what it was like, waiting for you to stumble around and tell me anything? To hear from Gojo or Shoko that you saw them but I wasn’t even worth it? I waited weeks— months for anything. I would’ve taken a card saying anything. Hell, you could’ve been like, surprise! I killed those people. See you never xoxo! And I would’ve taken it. I would’ve sucked it up and swallowed my pride. But you didn’t say a word, Suguru. Not a single thing. That’s what devastated me.”

Suguru blinked slowly, staring at you from over nose as she seemed to blankly contemplate her next words. “A conversation wouldn’t have changed my decision.” She repeated, except it was more firm.

You take in a shaky breath, “I know that.”

“No, you don’t. I can see that you don’t.” Suddenly, Suguru’s hand raised, hesitating, before tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. “I honestly didn’t haven’t anything right to say to you. Anything that came to mind, it just… it wasn’t right. I wanted it to be right with you.”

You tried to ignore the erratic beat of your heart and the heat rising to your cheeks as you stared up at her. “I would’ve taken anything.”

“You deserved more than some empty words I would’ve given. you then.”

A part of you truly did wonder what she could have told you then to comfort you. A part of you knew that you probably would’ve tried to convince her to come with you. To try and make amends with a system she despised. Or maybe it would’ve been carnage and your rage would’ve gotten in the way. Maybe it was best that you two hadn’t talked then.

Still, that teen in you had wished desperately for her one last time.

“My conversation with Satoru… she told me to stay away from you,” Suguru continued when you didn’t speak, “She said that one of us would probably do something incredibly dumb.”

Your eyebrows shot upwards, “Like what?”

Suguru rolled her shoulder, a distant look in her eyes, “I don’t know. Something dumb.”

“We were never the smartest together.”

“I suppose.”

The conversation waned and you suddenly noticed that Suguru’s curse was gone along with the strawberry. Probably both fell away into the recesses of whatever deep dark pit they were all nestled in. Waiting to be coaxed out, waiting to obey and impress their master by any means necessary.

It almost reminded you of high school.

Your desperate attempts at catching her eye. Gaining attention from the angelic girl that sat two seats over. Pathetic battles you placed yourself smack dab in the middle to show off and impress her with your silly fighting style. You were so painfully obvious and embarrassing back then. As if you were one of her curses, bound and promised to serve her. Fight for her, live for her, breathe for her. A loyal dog. Gojo had called you that once.

Shamefully, you acknowledged that same sense of loyalty lingered in the air now.

Why else would you drag yourself to this place? Killing a curse before she could get it just to send a message? Why would you want to warn the psycho killer that inhabited the body of your first…something eight years after she completely abandoned you?

Loyalty and need.

Suguru, larger than life, had you even after all these years.

Eight years wasn’t nearly enough time to lay her memory to rest.

“I’m not going to fight you,” Suguru spoke once the silence dragged on for almost too long. Her hands were tucked into her large sleeves, a peaceful expression on her face with something prowling in the darkness of her eyes. “You can return and tell them I caught you off guard while you were attacking the curse. That I got the upper hand. It’s the easiest way to explain why we’ll depart largely unscathed.”

You tried to ignore the way her eyes trailed up and down your body, taking in the wounds scattering your skin. Instead, paying more attention to her words. Which were more kind than you expected.

“I’m sure they’ll ask you questions. Just act dumb, you were always good at that when we were in trouble.” Then she turned towards the stairs.

She was walking away from you again.

Her back turned. Long black tresses swaying across her back. Shoulders tight and straight. Respectable.

She was walking away from you again.

Suguru! You had called out softly that day. Much younger and much dumber than you were now. Her back had faced you then. You thought nothing of it. Despite how much you longed to stare at her face, you hadn’t doubted you’d see it again. I didn’t even hear you leave. Will I see you later?

Suguru had released something soft then, peeking over her shoulder at you, Later.

She had walked away from you.

She never came back.

She was walking away from you.

There was no coming back.

You just needed a moment longer. Just a little more time to drag out the various things you’d imagined in the eight years she’d been absent. To satisfy some sick twisted part of you that longed, that yearned, that held onto her memories so dearly. The delusional part of you that believed things could be the same in some distant universe.

She was walking away.

She’s not going to come back. She wasn’t even giving the illusion that you both would see each other again.

She was walking away.

What are you going to do? You can’t let her go. Not after you’d gotten a taste of the girls you once were. Not that you’d felt her and—

She’s walking away!!!

“They know about those kids.”

You’re not entirely sure why you said that specifically. Probably something to do with the fact that was the original warning you wanted to convey with this whole thing. It just kinda came out. There was no putting it back in.

However, watching Suguru’s back stiffen, rigid and almost unnatural, as she paused in her steps, you realized you wanted to put it back in.

“Excuse me?” Her voice was different. Flat and unwelcoming, hard and unforgiving. She moved her head to regard you with the words you’d just spoken. They were darker than before. Guarded.

You keep your expression carefully open, trying to convey that you weren’t threatening her, “There’s moles in your congregation. They’re watching you and your family. They’re trying to find your weakness and they’ve started to set their eyes on those girls.” You pushed out in one breath.

Suguru pauses for a long moment, jaw tweaking and lips pressed thinly, “And I assume you saw what they had?” Her tone was still cold, still stiff.

You nod, “Yes. It’s very small, very limited. But they have some type of knowledge.”

Suguru faced away once again, her arms at her side and hands clenching. “Goddammit.” She hissed under her breath.

“I just wanted to give you that, uh, warning, so…” You cleared your throat, awkwardly swaying your arm. “Be careful.”

Suguru didn’t look amused or entirely receptive to your words. She suddenly turned around and glared at you. “How much do they know?” She sounded a bit frantic under the firmness of her tone.

“Just that they’re young. That you’ve had them around for a while. But they don’t know their technique or really anything about them.”

“It’s still too much. They know too much.”

“I’m sorry.” You uttered, as if you were the one that had caused all of this.

Suguru raised an eyebrow, “For what?”

There were a lot of things. Many things that you felt responsible for. Primarily—

“I’m sorry I wasn’t enough to stop it.”

Suguru’s complexion paled and she looked unbearably uncomfortable. “Stop what?”

“I never…There must’ve been something I could’ve done for you.”

Her expression grew firm and she released a heavy sigh. “I already told you, there isn’t anything that could’ve—”

“Deterred you from your path, I know. But—” Suguru let out an unbearable noise as if you were causing her great pain. Your own expression tightened up woefully. “But I still wished you were there. That-That you stayed and I could help.”

“You realize that I would’ve been miserable, right?”

“Was I really that bad at helping you?”

“No, I just…. No, you were the only thing keeping there until….”

Until it wasn’t enough. It lingered in the air and, for once, you realized that your apology was warranted. That your teenage self had tried to push down the despair with smiles and jokes. By lingering in her space, doing everything with her. Try to drag her from the recess of her mind.

It wasn’t helpful. Not when it really mattered. Not when it should’ve.

You weren’t there when she was hurt. You weren’t there when she was spiraling. And you were basically nonexistent.

“You and Satoru— you’ve always had your complexes. Whether you realize it or not.” Suguru continues on, eyes unwavering on your face. You’re suddenly hyper aware of the space and distance between you. Large and apparent. An obvious fissure separating you both from one another. “You wanted to save me. You still do. But you can’t.”

"Is it so bad that I just wanted you next to me?" You asked desperately, subconsciously inching forward.

"No, but it's bad that you still do." Suguru said honestly, a terrible thing flashing across her expression that was so vulnerable and so raw. It reminded you of days kinder and younger than you both now.

You scoff in reply, shaking your head and ignoring the flare of heat that covers your cheeks.

"You are loyal to a fault." She continues, eyeing you tenderly as she seemingly accepts her twisted perception in your life. "But it's misplaced. You have to accept that. I'm not coming back."

Your chest aches and your hands clench at your sides, nails creating crescents in your palms as you close your eyes. "Suguru—"

Suddenly, your hands are captured in a large embrace. Long fingers wrapped around your considerably smaller ones. Warm and tender, they had always been warmer than your hands. As if she were the sun and your the cold, desolate moon. Her fingers gently pried the unbearable grip you had on yourself and instead caressed her soft tips against the crescents marring the butt of your palms now.

You dared to drag your eyes upwards once again and meet her eyes. Her gaze is soft, unrelenting, and unbearably kind. Honey glazed eyes staring into your endless pits. Much too bright for the criminal. Something stares back at you. A pleading glint in there that you recognize from a days long passed. A call for the piece of you still holding on to a memory of her.

How am I, a lowly idiot, supposed to accept that you, an angelic figure, left me behind? When you look at me like that? You think, heart aching as you clasp onto her hands.

There's something twitching on your face and you're mortified to find it's a smile.

Suguru lets out a guttural sound, almost as if she'd been punched. "I can't do this." She utters between you both, but it's more directed to herself. Her eyes frantically skimming over your every feature. She seemingly absorbed something she found in your eyes. She spoke louder, "This is driving me crazy."

You blink lazily, "Huh?"

You have to tilt your head upwards to keep your gaze on her wavering face, crumbled and desperate. Her grip on your hands tightens as her tongue darts out to wet her plump lips. "I came here as a last send off to you."

Foolishly, you realize, you came for the same, "Me too."

"Would it be so wrong to..." You're suddenly jerked forward, pressed against her as the hunger in her eyes grows. One hand slides from your own and presses against your cheek, warm and welcoming. "Would it be bad for one last time?"

"No." Is your immediate answer.

"No, no, it wouldn't." She mutters, leaning forward, "I'm terribly greedy."

"You deserve to be."

Suguru lets out a breathless sound as both your lips meet.

It makes so much sense for Suguru to kiss the way she does— eager, but tender, excited. but careful. The soft press doesn't even attempt to hide how much she truly wanted this.

A feeling blossoms throughout your body as you capture her lips into your memory once again. Fuller and more experienced than those years ago, she moves gently as if to take this in carefully. Both of you slipping into one another as if two puzzle pieces newly found and a perfect match.

Suguru's kisses were much like her personality— rumbunctious, sweet, and calm. She kisses like she was breathing life into you. Like she was the representation of everything beautiful and good. All of it makes you snake your arms around her shoulders, around her neck, and pull her closer. Please, please, don't go away now. Don't leave me like this. You silently pleaded.

She obliged, her own hands snaking down your waist and resting over your tender flesh, fingers digging into your sides. Pressing you closer against her own body.

Suguru's lips are wet, and plump, and sweet, and you might just die right there. You were close enough that you could smell the sweet perfume clinging to her clothes much like you were.

Pressed against her, her fingers grabbing at you, lips warm and parting with wet clicks, heavy breaths in between. Her eyes watch you from heavy lids, a slight red hue brushed over her cheeks and bridge of her nose. It was like a desperate pull to continue, to not part until it was absolutely necessary.

There's something terribly serious and hungry in Suguru's gaze that makes your heart beat erratically and a ball in your gut tighten. Her lips twitched upwards. Then, she was pressing a wet kiss against your neck, pulling back only the slightest to speak,

"You're so beautiful." Another kiss, then nip.

You straighten, eyes falling closed as you release a small noise. A tingling wave of pleasure shot down your spine and into that needy place between your legs. An aching feeling filled with desperation making you reach out and twist your hands into her silk hair. Tugging as she needily licked and nipped at the pulse beating against her tongue.

You tried to remain calm. Tried focusing on the hot metal that was wrapped around her bottom lip. The way it had softly clicked against your teeth as she hungrily chased after your lips. Or the way they pressed against your skin now, smooth and a stark contrast to the mess that was Suguru's movements.

She trailed her lips from your collarbone, up, up, and up to your jaw where she nips it, running a soothing kiss against it once she was done. The noises that left you were embarrassing, but you couldn't find it in yourself to care much as she moved back to bring her lips against your own. Soft and tender. Speaking more than she could possibly convey with words.

Suddenly, you push forward, absorbing Suguru's shocked whimper with your erratic and feverish lips. The woman was clearly caught off guard by your sudden eagerness, but gave no complaint as you pushed her towards the floor. You possessively grab onto her thigh, the fabric of her robes pooling at the junction of her thigh and revealing the skin under it. Soft and warm, you squeeze and bring it to wrap around your waist as you lean over her. Her hands pressed against your cheeks and opened her mouth to allow you to desperately lap at the warmth. Frantic hands moving to gently open up her robes and expose her to you and you alone.

Your fingers reached between the heavy pooled fabric, basking in the way Suguru gasps against your lips at your touch. You lower and lower and—

The fabric is like silk.

Your eyes open, pulling away with a loud smack, you stare dumbfounded at the sight under you.

Suguru, whether specifically for this or just a daily occurrence (something that made you dizzy, wore a pink-ish purple set. Elaborate bra that was sheer, see through and proudly displaying her large breasts to you adorning two distinctly new piercings on each nipple. Lower, she wore stockings and a garter, wrapped around her middle thigh that was almost swallowed whole by the fat. The stockings made your brain fuzzy as you ran the tip of your finger against it. Electricity shooting all over your body as you dragged and dragged.

Her panties made your brain short circuit completely.

They were completely see through. They left nothing to the imagination as slick seemed to collect into the fabric, vaguely making out the way her clit jumped and pulsed with her pants. You resisted the urge to cry as you spotted the Christina piercing resting just above her hood. Glittering along with her cunt, it presented itself like a beautiful jewel for a king— or, more appropriately a queen.

Awestruck, you reached out and ran your finger over her lips, listening to her whimper and watching as she clenched around nothing.

“You’re more gorgeous than I remember.” You mutter, tilting your head as you stroke her once again.

Suguru lets out a breathless laugh, eyebrows furrowed, “You callin’ me ugly, princess?” She whispered, sounding equally as teasing as she was drunk on whatever chemicals were running through her body now.

You snap your eyes to her, tense as you pause in your menstruation, “No, you’ve always been beautiful to me, Suguru— I-I just… You’re so…” Gorgeous? Amazing? Breathtaking? Show-stopping? There were too many words you could use to describe her now. Too many things running through your tiny mind in that moment to truly grasp one.

Suguru’s lips were upturned, “So…?”

You were much too distracted to care about continuing your previous statement. “I want to… Fuck—“ You jerked forward, feeling lightheaded as you licked your lips. “I really, really want to touch you.”

“What are you waiting for?”

You didn’t wait for much more before you were kissing her swollen lips again. Your arm stretched to pushed past her panties and to greedily press against her.

Eagerness overtakes you as you run your pointer and middle finger through her lips, grazing her hole, then bringing the slick back to her clit to roll a lazy circle over it— Suguru gasps softly. Lips parted and face scrunched as you press. You watch in awe as she closes her eyes, tilting her head back as your movements grow precise and smooth.

You were convinced you were touching a piece of heaven. Her cunt was as soft and delicate as the rest of her. The wetness collected their almost made it silk-like. A gentle place that you tainted by brushing her hole and grinding the butt of your palm against her aching clit.

"God, just—" Suguru growled, jaw clenched as you tease her hole again with shaking fingers. "I swear, if you don't just put them in m— ngh!"

Your two fingers pushed in and Suguru grinds against your palm as she moans. A prominent blush now dusting her cheeks. Almost like she was embarrassed.

"You're so sensitive," you say, breathless, "are you embarrassed, Suguru?"

Suguru manages to conjure up an annoyed look, that make you grin in response. So you're a bit mean, that wasn't anything new. But it felt so refreshing in this setting. The fact that she was under you now and looking so... so her. It made you dizzy and reminiscent.

"You know you're unfairly gorgeous." You start to gently thrust your fingers, listening to the squelch and feeling her tighten around you with a pant. "Even your pussy is gorgeous."

Suguru lets out something akin to a laugh, but is quickly masked by the breathless sigh she releases. "Are you going to talk all night or fuck me?"

You try to keep your head on straight as you smirk down at her. "I just want to take my time."

Suguru huffs, but continues to roll her hips to meet with your hand. It's almost too much. The way she squeezes around you and sucks you closer. The way she whimpers and moans, yet tries to keep that serious mask over her face. It all drives you insane. You wanted nothing more than to watch her come undone under you.

Much to both of your disappointment, you pull away from her.

"Don't tease me— c'mon." Suguru paws at your shirt (now rumpled and unbuttoned), whiny and desperate as she stares up at you. "We've waited so long."

Your heart almost shatters, swallowing a thick lump that forms in your throat— you didn't want to think about any of that. Any of the bad things that happened between now and then.

With a hazy mind, you tug Suguru's panties off, throwing them in an unknown direction. Your hands rest against her open thighs, basking in the way she drips onto the robes below her, glittering under the soft light leaking from the window down the hall.

"Well," Suguru starts, a grin on her lips, "go on."

Like all those years ago, you don't hesitate to obey her command.

You lean down and place a kiss just above the hood of her clit. Closing your eyes as she lets out a gentle noise, her fingers finding home in your hair and clenching. Then, you lick a stripe from her hole up to her clit, wrapping your lips around the enlarged bud.

"Oh!" Her tone falters into what sounds like a mewl.

You suck and nip, coarse tongue swirling against the aching twitching bundle of nerves. Slipping two fingers into your hole, you try to focus on the way she writhes and presses your head closer.

A hoarse moan bounces off the wall as Suguru's wall clench more erratically against your fingers. Closer and closer. You curl them upwards—

"I've missed you. I've missed you so damn bad." The curse user babbles, drunk off the feeling coursing throughout her body from that spot of plushy flesh your petting. Chasing after the nearing edge that made her tingle and whimper. "Never want to leave you— never want to miss you again."

You draw in a breath as you reach down and start to finger yourself as you pick up the pace with Suguru.

You ignore the buildup in your eyes, the undeniable build up of pent up emotions almost taking over. You clench your eyes closed, trying to not think of it all. Of how badly you had missed her— missed this. Your mind repeating the lonely nights where you had only ever wanted her beside you. The days that you wished it was instead you running amuck, leaving death in your wake, and her in Tokyo. Enjoying a cushy job with people who actually love her.

Maybe that was more tolerable than the truth.

Your mind was filled with her. Your senses, all of it— Suguru. Suguru. Suguru. It wasn't possible to think or feel anything that wasn't her.

Please, please, please, Suguru pleads from her place. Sobbing as she tugs your hair, grinding against your mouth.

Her thighs are glistening with her own juices and your spit. Covering your own face and skin as well as you desperately swirl your tongue against her as if it was singlehandedly keeping you alive. You lick a firm stripe across Suguru one more, making her cry out and arch her back. You feel yourself grow closer as she babbles on about how good you are and how much she's missed you.

"You're all I think about," she gasps and cries, "all I ever needed."

As you clenched around yourself, you moan around her. Suguru sharply gasps, then, suddenly, her walls are pulsing around your fingers and her clit is spasming against your tongue. You watch from your place as her face scrunches up with pure bliss, lips parted to release the prettiest sounds you've ever heard, faint blush dusting across her entire body.

Your close behind with your own earth shattering, white noise inducing orgasm. Your grip on her unrelenting and surely to leave some type of mark to remind her of you later.

When you slowly come down, you realize that Suguru has pulled you down to lay on top of her robe with her. Staring at you hazily, swollen glistening lips, and that beautiful glow on her face.

"You're crying," Suguru whispers, reaching up to brush away the salty tears with the pads of her thumbs. "Was it too much?"

You're not entirely sure exactly what it was. An assortment of things. Things that made your chest ache and the love you felt almost unbearable. How were you meant to tell someone you had just ate out, that was laying next to you, wiping away your tears, that you missed them? You missed her, but she wasn't even really gone yet.

"I don't...I don't want to lose you again, Suguru." You admitted in a breathless whisper, eyes unwavering as you stared at her sad expression— both of you knowing what would happen. "Please."

"I can't come back." She stated, shaking her head. "Not after everything. No one would want me back."

"I want you back— we want you back."

"Not the people that matter."

You couldn't deny the horrible pang that spread throughout your chest and into your bottomless stomach. Not the people that mattered. Not you. Never you. You weren't enough—

"Hey," Suguru's hold on your face was firm and she brought you back from your mind. "Even if I wanted to come back, the higher-ups wouldn't ever joke about it. I'd be executed. Like you're supposed to be doing."

You sniffle, "Whatever, who cares what they think, anyway?"

There was a prolonged silence as you both just laid with one another. Staring at the crumbling ceiling above you with contemplative frustration. She was right, the higher-ups wouldn't even think about it before ordering her execution to proceed. Then you'd have the guilt of her death weighing you down.

Maybe she was better off far away from you. Far away from the world she hated so badly. Happier in her own world, with the family she created. Two little girls and three randoms that somehow found their way in her inner circle. You wished you couldn't be jealous. Detest them for so easily staying in her life. But you were selfish. You were mean.

There was a reason Suguru left you behind, this you were sure of.

"I would've told you that I loved you."

You're broken from your thoughts when Suguru speaks. You snap your attention to her and find that she's got her attention solely on the ceiling above. A distant look in her eyes and a careful blankness to it all that makes you pause.

"Huh?" You hum back.

She moves her head to look at you, honestly and tenderly. "If I saw you when I left, I would've told you that I loved you. That's why I couldn't keep you around. I couldn't confine you to a cage, constantly looking over your shoulder because of me."

You sniffle, nodding. Much like you not begging for her to come back with you, she wouldn't beg for you to leave with her. "I understand."

Suguru stares for a moment longer before she's suddenly shoving your shoulder, sitting up. "You're disgusting, by the way. Fucking me on the floor of a nasty abandoned apartment building like some feral animal." She looked irritated, but you could hear the teasing in her tone and the slight twitch of her lips.

You push yourself to sit up, watching as she grabs her panties from a nearby pile, disgust on her features. "You weren't exactly complaining, if I recall correctly." You conjure up the energy to tease back.

Suguru's face screws up, then she throws her panties at you, grumbling as you snort in return. "Eight years and you act like a hormonal teen at the sight of me."

"I have my weaknesses."

"I'm a weakness?"

Suguru was joking but your face set and you nodded. "My one and only."

Her expression faltered. Suddenly somber as she extended a hand to you, pulling you up easily. "Not good to reveal your hand to the enemy, L/n." She uttered.

You raise an eyebrow, pressed against her front. "You're the enemy?"

Suguru snorted softly, pressing a kiss against your cheek. "Always have been. Now, let me get dressed." She shooed you off her robes.

You watch her with dying words on your lips. Instead, you just chose to cherish the moment for as long as you can.

"I heard you've had an interesting few weeks."

It was barely a day after you got home and submitted your report that you were confronted in your office in Kyoto.

She appeared in a flash, as she always had. A blur of white and black, an overwhelming stench of some cologne that she was either gifted or pulled off a shelf. Expensive. As always.

You jump. Eyes wide as you're met with her for the first time in three years. It almost makes you dizzy. Almost makes you mournful for what once was.

It's been years since you last saw Gojo Satoru. She was different, but you could pick apart exactly was the same. Taller, an array of piercings on both ears, hair stuck up in a mess of white tendrils defying gravity as the bandages wrapped around her eyes. Yet she still had that arrogant posture. That hip pop that always accompanied her. Arrogant.

But there were pieces of things familiar. A part of her was still that 17-year-old, standing in the doorway of your dorm, begging for answers about her best friend's defection. You could tell she was still in there. Part of her reaching out, childishly crying, pleading for something long gone by. You always knew she lingered.

You drag your eyes from her towards the pile of documents waiting for your attention on the desk. Something that you were just about to get to until the woman rudely interrupted.

"It's rude to burst into someone's office without calling first." You respond flatly.

Gojo didn't crack a smile, only kept her stance in the middle of the room, "I assume you didn't kill her. Obviously, she would've fought back. You'd be dead." She rambled to herself.

You huff, rubbing your forehead as you fall back into your chair, "Thanks."

"I thought you would've called me if you were ever assigned something like that. But I suppose you've never been the smartest."

"Like I have your number saved anymore?"

"Again, not the smartest."

You clench your jaw, her arrogant tone grating against the wrong gears within you. Gojo had always been too blunt, too blasé for your taste. Even as teens she had watched you from an upturned nose, scornful eyes scrutinizing your every move. It took you a long time before you ever went around her, let along considered her a friend. Her attitude and general disregard for most people was offputting.

You suppose that's something that happens when everyone treats you like a God.

Gojo falls into the chair across from you, long lanky leg crossed over the other, elbow rested on the back. If it weren't for the painfully straight line of her lips, you would've assumed she was at ease. But you knew better.

"I don't understand why they picked you of all people for executing her." The snark in her voice wasn't welcomed.

You draw in a deep breath, you just needed a bit of patience, "I'm sure you would've jumped at the opportunity if you were here."

"Mm, not really." Gojo tilts her head back and you can tell she's scrutinizing you from over her nose. "But, by the sound of things, you were the one jumping at the chance."

You tense and your fingers drum away on your desk top. An assortment of thoughts flush through your mind. Primarily, the things that you and Suguru had done before parting ways.

Hey! Suguru had called as you walked down the stairs, fingers found home around your arm and, effectively, made you stop to turn back. If you're ever in a bind and need me— or you realize what I did— there will always be a home for you with me. With my family.

You had faltered, eyes wide, before clearing your throat and offering a nod. I'll be sure to remember that. You had turned away and took a few more steps before looking back up at her with a small smile. You're not my enemy, Suguru. That's something I always knew.

You didn't linger on the shock that had overtook her face. Instead, leaving while you still could.

"You said in your report that you didn't see her nor did you sense any signs that she had ever been there." Gojo continues on, oblivious to the inner battle you're facing.

You lean back in your chair, sighing in vague annoyance. "Yes, I did."

"You're a liar."

The lack of hesitation and bluntness of the statement catches you off guard. Your eyes widen and you stiffen, staring at her blank disposition with confusion. Gojo was so unlike herself in this moment. So serious. So final.

It brought you great unease.

Gojo leans forward in her seat, grabbing a mini calendar from your desk to fiddle with it. "Want to know how I know?" You can't see her eyes but you can tell she looks to you for a genuine answer. You only stare back silently in return. "Her residuals are everywhere in that place. They're all twisted with your residuals. Like you were mingling."

You frown, that could easily be explained away, "Well—"

"You're covered in her." And this time, you knew that she was staring right at you.

You stare back blankly this time. Unable to find something smart or notable that could possibly explain what her Six Eyes are seeing. It was pointless. A futile thing that would only make her more frustrated than she seemingly already was.

So, you offered her the only thing you were sure of, your silence.

Gojo clenches her jaw, hunching over in her seat. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know what you mean."

"How long have you been seeing her? Was this just a perfect chance for you both to explain away any residuals?" She sounded heated, tense and unnatural.

You always wished she would be her annoying regular self.

"Gojo, I don't know who you think you are, but it's been three years—"

"You're the one who cut us all off!" Gojo stood, pointing a long and accusatory finger at you. You only recall the few times she's ever been truly angry. A ball of rage that's been contained for much too long. Snapping into two pieces that overflowed with a rage of someone much younger. "You're the one who-who pulled away and then got angry because I was around! Then you up and vanished without a word to anyone. Fucked off to Kyoto, like what the hell even is this shit?"

You watch as she gestures wildly around the office with disgust and a loud scoff. A bitter part of you was almost happy to see the anger rolling off of her in waves. Another part of you couldn't imagine Gojo Satoru being this upset over you of all people. This had to be something else. She was mad—

Geto Suguru.

"I called Nanami—"

Gojo whirled around on you, "Not me! You didn't call me! You just left without a word and then I had to hear from Nanami about it like it was nothing."

"I didn't think you'd even want to talk to me with how things were left, Gojo! Can you blame me for just wanting to get away from that place?"

"Yes, I can! I most definitely can!"

You scoff, shaking your head as a familiar anger washed over you. "God, you're such a child."

"And, what, you've been running around behind the higher-ups backs, seeing Suguru all these years? Is that why you ran off? Because you thought I'd see her all over you and tell on you like some kid? Is that it? Is that why you left?"

Her incessant questions were driving you crazy. Alongside the misplaced anger, you were bound to throw something back at her. It was deserved. It was warranted.

"Satoru, you are so insufferable! I rushed off because I hated that school. I hated that I had to walk around and see Suguru but not actually see her! Not to mention you were the world's biggest bitch for a year after that! You acted like I was the goddamn bane of your existence and you wouldn't leave me alone!" You stood and matched her level. There was surely someone that could hear you two duking it out now. Laying things out for one another and, hopefully, leave each other for more years to come. "And, no, I hadn't seen Suguru for eight years before she showed up at that goddamn apartment complex! I was living a peaceful and non-annoying life until three days ago!"

There was a pause between you both.

You taking deep breaths as Gojo stands in the middle of your office awkwardly, stiffly. She almost looked like one of the students after you tried to deal out a punishment for whatever foolish thing they've done. The thought alone made you take a deep breath, pinching the bridge of your nose.

You're not entirely sure what to say to her now. Without the awkward air only growing—

"You were my friend. And you left."

You were all too aware how young Gojo suddenly sounded. Tender and all too sad to be a 24 year old woman standing before you.

A friend?

"You had Shoko." You easily countered.

"I wanted you."

The revelation made you shut up. Standing awkwardly behind your desk and staring at her with a scrunched face. Wanted you? She wanted you? There's no way that she truly meant it. It was just nostalgia making her speak. Making her lose sight of what actually happened in those years.

"I-I wanted you like a friend, by the way. None of that— um, not like gay or anything!" She suddenly stuttered and sounded terribly like herself compared to herself. "I just... you were... my friend. And... I didn't— I don't have many of those."

Her words were stilted and awkward again. Something that made you tilt your head at her. She didn't look away from you as you processed the words. You were her friend. One of her only friends. Then you left. Right after she lost her one and only best friend.

Suguru's defection made you cruel and selfish.

You press your lips together, "Well, I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything."

"Right," Gojo nods, crossing her arms over her chest. "A little late."

Your chest tightened. "I suppose so."

She stands there for a beat longer before a grin broke across her lips. "Well, you could make it up to me." Her tone was much too light and eager to be genuine or true. But you weren't about to ruin it by asking.

You hesitate in asking, "What?"

"Come get crepes with me!" She said, not allowing you to answer as she grabbed your hand. "Shoko ditched me for Utahime."

"Oh, so I'm backup?"

"No— Well, a bit. But this will be a great bonding moment." She turned her head towards you, dimples prominent. "You in?"

You stared for a long moment. Wondering what could possibly run through Gojo Satoru's mind. How she could so quickly change her emotions. To be so vehemently angry one moment and happy the next. But that had always been her. A ball of rage that could fight back at any moment and then resolve it with her smile and pretty eyes—

"C'mon, just one crepe, some talking, then you can ditch me again." She said it teasingly, but you could tell there was a hint of sadness. Desperation.

You snort softly. "Okay, Satoru."

Her cheeks dusted pink and she pulled you out the room. "Missed you calling me that!"

"Satoru? It's your name."

"Yeah, but Gojo makes it sound like you hate me."

"Well..."

"Hey!"

You and Satoru do not mention Geto Suguru that entire night. Or the night after that. Or the night after that.

It was probably for the best.

[cielles-random-vault]

new year's hangover☆

lil drabble where you befriend ghost at the tf141 new year's party... what can possibly go wrong?

content: drunkness, socially anxious-ish reader, ghost being ghost, passing out and hickeys.

author's note: UHHH HAI IM BACK?!?!? icl im kinda hating myself because im posting a drabble instead of a full work.... am sorry.. mi bad mi bad... also im waiting for friday for new invincible content because the brainrot is REALLL

also pls pretend i posted this on new year's eve... HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YALL BTWWWWW

shotout to @unabashedcroissanttreefan bc i want to make her bitter /hj, and to @michelleart8 ! <3

anyway enjoy and pls reblog

wc: 1836

"will you be coming at the new year's party tonight?" price asked as he noticed you filling some paperwork in the common room.

"i dont think so" you sigh, "im not that much of a social person, and i still have a lot of paperwork to fill in,let alone medical files."

"are you sure?" price asked, worried you might overwork yourself, but then an idea suddenly came to his mind. "i heard the lieutenant will be there as well, rumors have it you have a crush on him, so it'd be a good opportunity to actually talk to him, instead of just- avoiding him like you do."

the thought of captain price having noticed you had a crush on ghost sent a bright blush to your cheeks, but you waved those thoughts away.

"even if he was here, that doesn't mean i stand a chance with him" you reply, losing focus on your paperwork, now that the lieutenant was mentioned. "we barely talk anyway, and he seems to hate me so..."

"he seems to hate everyone" price chuckled, "dont take it personally. did the fact that he will be there change your mind?"

"i dont know" you sigh, but your little smile was betraying you. "it will depend on whether i have finished filling those files. at what time will it start?"

"around 7!" price replied with a subtle smile, feeling like he convinced you to come. "oh,and, you can come in a casual outfit, no need to pull up the formal uniform", he winked and left.

the few hours that separated you from the awaited party came, and all of a sudden a sudden peak of anxiety invaded you.

what if everyone made fun of your awful social skills? what if you didnt dress well enough?

your overthinking stopped as you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket; surprisingly enough, it was a text from price.

are you coming? ghost is here 👀

you chuckled as you put on a comfy sweater, and headed to the common room.

"you came!!" price greeted you, smiling brightly at you. "make yourself at ease, go get yourself something to drink, and who knows? maybe alcohol can help you make a move on our lovely lieutenant" he chuckled, before handing you a cup of alcohol.

"do you... want to get me drunk so i could get rid of my social anxiety?" you asked price, raising an eyebrow.

"maybe" he chuckled, already sounding drunk, "is it working?"

"not reall- ouch"

you blushed brightly as you noticed ghost was the one who stumbled into you.

"oi," he said, sounding slightly drunk as well, "im sorry. must've lost my balance, probably drank too much already. you're y/n, right?"

"y-yes," you nod, still not over the interaction, praying he didn't notice the bright blush on your cheeks, "why?"

"because..." he tries to articulate, and nearly fell on the floor, "ive been meaning to tell you... you're doing a great ass good job... dont let my mean words convince you otherwise, k?"

"oh-" you said, taken aback by this sudden demonstration of kindness, your heart melting. "thank you lieutenant..?"

the evening went on, until the cheerful "happy new year!!!" resonated in the walls of the tf141's buildings, everyone happy to finally greet the new year.

the party then came to an end, and so you decided to stay a little longer to help clean the room. once you got done, and got ready to head back to your quarters, you noticed an odd figure.

was ghost... asleep? he sure seemed to. he probably passed out due to all the alcohol he had drank, and you couldn't blame him.

that's how he somehow ended in your quarters - and if you were to be honest, carrying a man as massive as him was NOT an easy thing, but you somehow managed to. you tried your best to put him in a comfortable position on your couch, but bringing him here was already kind enough, wasn't it? so you just left him laying down on the floor, covering his massive frame with a blanket, and put a pillow under his head.

"this sure was a strange new year's day" you thought out loud, "happy new year lieutenant"

just in case something happened to ghost, you decided pull an all nighter (?), and you were right to, well at least, soft of.

in the middle of the night, ghost woke up, seemingly not over his hangover.

"i'll tell you what, y/n, ive always been in love with you." he mumbled, barely able to stand.

your heart dropped at this confession, but you had to stay lucid: he couldn't possibly mean it, it had to be the alcohol, right? that would make no sense if he was in love with you.

but you couldn't help to secretely wish what he was saying was true, after all you know the saying: drunk words are sober thoughts, and now you really hoped the saying was true there.

"lieutenant,you're drunk, you should go back to sle-"

he interrupted you by kissing you, first on the lips, and then moved on to your neck, leaving a little trail of hickeys here and there.

you gave in the kiss, you knew it was wrong, but it felt so good, but quickly waved those thoughts off: it was wrong in any way. he was your superior, and drunk, you couldn't abuse his drunken state like that.

but the feel of his lips on yours sure felt like heaven...

as if nothing happened, he smirked softly as he pulled out of the kiss, and resumed his peaceful slumber on your floor.

however, the next morning was nothing like that.

"looks like someone had fun last night" ghost grumbled as he noticed your many hickeys. "what the fuck am i doing here? and where even is here, and did you poison me? why is my head pounding?" he asked, back to his usual stern self, and you would actually be surprised if he didnt.

"youre in my quarters" you reply as you handed him a cup of anti hangover tea. "i brought you here because we were the only two remaining at the party, and you passed out. and hum... about the hickeys, how much do you remember from last night?" you ask as you look away, embarassed at the thought of last night's passionate kiss.

"i dont remember shit, why?" he asked, sounding more annoyed than mean.

"okay i..." (you sigh) "promise not to get mad at me if i tell you?" (he shakes his head, annoyed) "okay, so... you confessed yesterday." you blurt out, "but that is not all." (you gulp.) "we also kissed and... you gave me those hickeys."

"oh." he said blankly, and you could feel the blush in his voice, despite his mask.

"yeah.." you chuckled awkwardly, not daring to look at him, "but i have one question though. were you honest when you said you... 'always have been in love with me?"

your heartbeat quickened as you waited for his answer, but you had to know.

"would it be weird if i said yes..?" he asked, unable to look at your eyes, and your heart nearly missed a beat. "i mean, youre always doing what youre told to despite the fact that i treat you like shit and... i don't know, i guess that made me develop a kind of soft spot for you... do you happen to feel the same way..?" he asked, and you could feel the vulnerability in his voice.

"i- i think i do..?" you replied, both confused and relieved. "i mean, i always thought you hated me but.. this feels a bit rushed. can we do it again?"

"okay" he nodded, "how does 'hello, my name is simon riley, known as ghost, lieutenant from the task force 141, and i am in love with the wonderful y/n' sounds?" ghost chuckled with a soft smile, loving at you with loving eyes.

"much better" you reply with a soft smile, butterflies fluttering in your stomach, way better.

later on that day, when you and ghost headed to the briefing room hand in hand, price couldn't help but let out a small laugh.

"see? seems like alcohol can do wonders" he whispered, and it made you let out a small chuckle as well.

[ryverbind]

Faceless Fixation (Sal Fisher): Beg For It [21]

TW: smut :P

_______________

dacnorthxx started following you.

sallysusedtoiletpaper: VI WHO IS THIS WHO IS NORTH WHY IS THIS INTERACTION GIVING ME LIFE??? t0ddles2: @sallysusedtoiletpaper frontman of dark autumn complex sallysusedtoiletpaper: @t0ddles2 oh omg ok... I've never heard of them are they any good?? ashypoops: I haven't heard of them either. What genre? More importantly DOES VI HAVE HER VERY FIRST SHIP toodswithoutthed: @ashypoops I WAS ABOUT TO ASK BC THE CHEMISTRY!?!? they're obsessed w each other... I went stalk his profile. Ship name options: northlence, violeth... t0ddles2: they're rock/metal. even if u don't like the genre, they're worth a listen sallysusedtoiletpaper: WORD I just followed him and their band account >:3 also @toodswithoutthed I'm personally a fan of violeth. I'm linking this shit in the faces fan discord ashypoops: THERE'S A FAN DISCORD??? can u send me an invite pooks🥺 sallysusedtoiletpaper: @ashypoops ofc😘 sallysusedtoiletpaper: OMFG SOMEONE BEAT ME TO THE CHAT EVERYONE KNOWS NOOOOOO

———

Yea, so I lost my job. Big shocker.

Once my boss found out that I dipped mid-shift, the text was typed out and sent by the evening.

In any other situation, I'd be fucked. Indefinitely. Completely broke and flailing to get a new job. In fact, that was my first thought. As soon as I got the text, I clicked onto my bank account to check how much I'd have to live off of until I found a new job--

--only to find out that I had over $2,000 just sitting around, which was such a nice surprise. I don't think I've ever had so much money to my name before in my entire life. And all the transactions were straight from all my streaming apps. All within the past two weeks since being back in LA.

To say the least, losing my job couldn't have happened at a better time. Now, I can put my focus into something I actually enjoy doing.

But first, a trip to Nockfell, which is proving to be more chaotic by the second.

"Todd, dude, there's a chemistry to this thing, okay? It's a ritual," Larry says, all seriousness and business face as he stares back into Todd's uninterested gaze. "I can't fly without it."

Todd blinks, a flash of frustrated disappointment crossing over his features. "You're not taking an edible before the flight, Lartholomew."

Ash had a ticket ready for me before she even got to LA yesterday. Her entire mastermind plan was to abduct me whether I liked it or not-- not that I would've said no to begin with. And besides, having her at the apartment to help me pack last minute made pre-flight stress non-existent.

Travis is camping out at my apartment. He was more than happy to kick me out of my own house, claiming that my bed is comfiest anyway. Regardless, he said he had no desire to return to Nockfell anyway. And dad was just excited for me to go visit considering how much I've complained about missing the little town over all these years.

Sal and I haven't spoken since his last commanding text to me. Right before his very sudden face reveal. He's caught in an almost petrifying silence-- has been since he put his prosthetic back on. I, on the other hand, very much resemble a little puppy whimpering and begging at his feet. Metaphorically, of course. I wouldn't dare to physically exploit my internal thoughts.

The really sickening truth is that I'm so desperate to see his face again that I'd trip him down a flight of stairs just to recreate yesterday's scene.

Just kidding. I don't mean that. I definitely don't.

"All our seats are kind of screwed up, so I have no idea where you're sitting, sugar." Ash pokes my cheek, her chin in her palm and elbow propped on the armrest of her seat. "I bought them kind of last minute so I took whatever they had available."

A little smile tips my lips as I turn my attention away from the grumpy smurf and focus on my stunning best friend. Her viridian irises glow with renewed joy and energy like our plans check off so many bullet points on her bucket list. "That's okay," I reply, tilting my head. "At least we actually have seats, right?"

Ash grins, her maroon shaded lips accentuating the light freckles along the bridge of her nose. "See?" she chirps, arm winding through mine to pull me closer. "You get it. When do you not get it?"

Our plane calls for us to board, and so begins the toxic, anxiety-inducing split-up of the century. I lose all The Faces somewhere in the crowded line that gathers at our gate in just a matter of seconds. That's okay though, I'll probably end up sitting with some old lady that smells like an odd mixture of peonies, Dial soap, and Lysol. You know, a funeral home and two colds away from death. So long as she's nice, I'll catch her dentures when they fall out of her gaping mouth as she naps.

Anything for MawMaw.

I hobble my way into the plane, brain set on finding my seat before stressing about all other one hundred and fifty two things I have to worry about later. People are everywhere and it's, expectedly, a huge plane. Three rows-- two seaters against each wall and a row of three seats down the middle. Sickening, really. Social anxiety's worst enemy is looking for means of escape only to be met by even more people.

I block everyone out as best as I can, pretending that the people I bump into are just very dense pieces of furniture. Or, actually, even better-- a bunch of really buff kitties. Yep, just passing through a horde of Maine Coon's and Munchkin's.

I spot row F, my pupils zeroing in on the letter like a scope on a gun. Target acquired.

The majestic way I veer around what my mind imagines is a really tall Siamese and their spouse, a yellow Persian, is something that the directors of The Matrix are pissed that they couldn't come up with. I swing my foot around a figurative pair of paws and reach my free hand out to grip onto my seat-- F20. That's right bitches, I did it.

I swing my suitcase up, somehow managing to actually get it into the overhead compartment. I give it a good shove with both of my hands and a grunt, then pull the backpack off my shoulders to keep it at my feet when I sit down.

But now that I've stopped, cats are pushing past me and it's so aggressive and rushed that they suddenly aren't sweet, fluffy kitties anymore. They're people again and I'm starting to get dragged away from my seat by this sea of shared distress.

Nimble fingers latch onto my wrist from the seat beside mine-- the seat against the window. The hand tightens around me, giving my body a good yank forward. I use the aided force to weave my way around a few more people up until the hand pulls me into my seat.

I huff out a breath, pushing my hair out of the eyeholes of my mask. And begrudgingly, I turn my head to meet bright cerulean hair.

Sal isn't looking at me, he's facing the window. His entire stature gives off a mixture of unbothered and ashamed. He shouldn't feel that second one-- never. Granted, he shouldn't feel angry half as much as he does but that's besides the point.

Ever since it happened, I could tell that the abrupt exposure of his face has been heavily weighing on him. I don't owe this man a single thing-- he's been awful to me in so many ways, but I give credit where credit is due. Not only did he own up and apologize to me yesterday, he helped me to my seat... and he is handsome. Regardless of how he views himself.

He's my biggest enemy and I, his. But if I plan on getting fucked during my visit to Nockfell, I have to give him the Beating of Truth.

"So," I mumble, chewing on the inside of my cheek. If you couldn't tell, I'm absolutely forcing myself to do this even though it's the last thing I want to do. "How are we working around Ash, Larry, and Todd when we get to Nockfell?"

Sal's head tips up a bit, like he's wondering to himself if I actually just spoke to him. Then his head pivots sideways so that he can side-eye me.

"What?" He asks, voice genuinely shocked and confused. It makes my heart stutter a bit. Any time he speaks in a tone that isn't aggressive, it completely reboots my system.

"How are we going to follow through with this arrangement?" I try again, simplifying it into Sal terms. He has a wide vocabulary range; maybe using bigger words will snap some sense into him. For added effect, I lean onto the armrest separating him and I, trying to show that he doesn't repulse me or anything of the sort.

Sal doesn't move away, instead, he adjusts his body so that he can address me. Fully turns his prosthetic face to me and settles into his seat. I didn't realize how tense he was when I first sat down, but watching him relax now shows me how much my simple mention of our agreement settled his mental turmoil.

He's quiet for a moment, eyes dancing across my mask and body before his gaze meets mine again. "You still want to?" he finally decides to ask, eyebrows lifting beneath his prosthetic.

"Yea," I snort, scrunching my nose up as if his question is ridiculous. "Why wouldn't I?"

Okay, stupid question. I know the answer and the words came out before I could stop them. In more ways than others, that was a genuine response though. I can't accept that Sal would be so put off by his own appearance because I truly think it's so lovely. I have to remember though that not everyone sees themselves the way I see them though.

Sal's brows bunch together again, his eyes narrowing. "Stupid fucking question," he echoes my own thoughts, voice even and void of tone. Whoopsie.

I roll my own eyes, sighing. "Well, to settle the whole debacle," I start, aiming to just bite the bullet and extinguish the awkwardness and misplaced fear vibrating between us. "I think you're quite the catch."

Friendly banter is weird. Borderline uncomfortable, but... not quite. Just so that I'm ready to get this over with but I'd be prepared for it to happen again.

A nasally snort leaves Sal and he rotates his head so that he's facing the pair of seats in front of us.

"So," he prods, ignoring my statement. "North?"

Mission success. I know he'll never admit it and he doesn't need to, but I think he appreciates the compliment.

"What's it to you?" I counter, adjusting my position in turn. I sit criss-cross applesauce in my seat, making sure my feet don't touch Sal because God forbid. "You still get to fuck me."

"Not much," he says lowly, hand moving to ruffle up his fringe. There's that dagger tattoo again. And then his head tilts just a bit, haunting sapphire blue piercing straight through my soul like the weapon etched onto his skin. "But you're mine. North can't give you even an ounce of what I can."

Fuzzy fingers, a pounding heart, and the worst case of cold sweats possible dominates my body for the rest of the flight. My brain replays that statement over and over again, plaguing me with recurring physical reactions like I've just heard it in real life again. I wish he hadn't said anything at all if it was going to leave me like this.

Neither of us said another word. The only sound between the two of us was the constant cracking of my knuckles accompanied by me putting my feet on the ground-- then sitting criss-cross again-- then having to readjust again and again and again. He left me quite literally restless and I'm sure he's relishing in just the knowledge of it.

Landing in Nockfell was a quick divergence from bubbly hearted affliction in my being. A good distraction from Sal.

Perpetual autumn. Nockfell never gets too hot or cold. The air is always misty, the sky always grey and cloudy. Tall, ever-growing trees dominate both night and day, stealing all the light from the sun and hiding it in their leafy treetops. Nockfell houses the kind of atmosphere that I've dreamt of returning to for years now; the gentle eeriness and chill that I've longed to bask in ever since I left.

We step out of the airport and into the small parking lot where a suspiciously blue haired man is waving at us with a big, dad-like grin on his face. Not a question in my mind. That's Sal's dad-- the cropped, receding cerulean hair was the first obvious sign but as we grow closer, his bright azure eyes are the second giveaway.

"Wassup, daddio!" Larry exclaims, wrapping Sal's father up in a huge bear hug (which is so Emo Buff Daddy of him). I nearly forgot that Sal's dad, who I now know as Henry, is also Larry's step-dad. Crazy.

"Not much, big guy!" Henry chuckles, rubbing Larry's back affectionately once the hug comes to an end. He pats Larry's shoulder, that big smile still on his aged face. "You guys brought the friend back! Convinced her to come huff up our humid air?"

Henry moves over to Ash, Todd, and then Sal to hug all of them. He purposefully places a discreet kiss on top of Sal's head before turning to me.

He holds his arms open suggestively and my heart flutters. "You okay with hugs?" He asks me. "Everyone's family here."

A grin of my own sneaks onto my face as I take a little step toward Henry and wrap my arms around his middle.

Henry's arms latch around my body, shielding me from the moist, heavy air of Nockfell and anything else that could possibly hurt me here. His embrace is so comforting, so familiar, so protective that tears I've been holding back for weeks suddenly rush to the surface.

I love my own dad, he's perfect, but being hugged by his near doppelgänger reminds me of how much I miss him. I wish dad and I weren't apart so often. But that'll change soon with the money I'm making.

I don't allow myself to weep, I hide the tears and pull away from the comforting hug I needed so desperately to smile sweetly at Henry. Lovely man, his own smile widens.

The group of us piles into Henry's old 2000 Nissan Pathfinder to navigate around Nockfell.

We first stop at Ash's place-- a home I haven't seen in a decade now. Everything is so nostalgic-- the tall, two story, white-painted, wooden home and the canopy of evil-looking trees that hide it from the road reminds me of a time that's been ripped away from me.

Ash leans on the door of Henry's SUV, the window down for her to speak to me before she disappears. "I'll come by Sal's or the apartments later to scoop you up, 'kay? Parents and I have a meeting with some guys to transfer ownership of some things to me before the move." She chews on her lip, a deep yearning in her pretty eyes. "I'd let you stay with me if I could."

I shake my head at her-- I don't want her to feel guilty for handling business. "No that's okay." I tell her sweetly, grabbing onto her hand. "I'll kickback with the guys."

Ash smiles, squeezing my hand in hers before breaking off to head to her house.

Now, I never imagined I'd end up coming back to Nockfell in general, but to stand in Sal Fisher's home? These were even more improbable odds.

And worse, Todd suddenly slips out of the house with the very mean (he's ditching me!) excuse of meeting with Neil for a late lunch. That just leaves me, Larry, and Sal standing in the spacious kitchen of their shared two-story home. It's quaint, roomy, and pretty nice. I imagine it's kept up specifically because Sal tends to it.

And Sal, he doesn't say anything. Which is typical behavior from him. He only, swiftly, spins on his heels, luggage in hand, and disappears into a room right past the stairs. Okay, fair. It's late in the afternoon-- naptime.

And now it's down to two.

I look to Larry with a grin. And he's grinning back excitedly, wiggling around like an antsy child who's about to go on a field trip.

"I can't believe we managed to get you over here," he whisper-yells, screaming silently. You know, just open-mouthed and head tipped to the ceiling in pure excitement.

"Even Copernicus wouldn't be able to debunk this turn of events," I joke, watching Larry dance around his kitchen. I put my bags down. I'm sure we'll figure out this situation later when Ash returns.

Larry opens up his refrigerator, moving around some bottles before uttering an expletive. "Ah, fuck," he hisses out, quickly lifting his head which results in him slamming said head into the freezer door. I pause, wincing, eyeing his silhouette warily while awaiting whatever he has to say next.

He resurfaces from the fridge, rubbing his aching head and chewing on his bottom lip. "I left my fucking bags in Henry's car." He curses again, glancing up at me with agitated eyes. "I have to run over to the apartments real quick." Larry starts inching away from the fridge and I feel my heart leap. How could he forget his luggage in the car? And is he really about to leave me here with the master of aggressive seduction himself? We're bound to tear this house apart either via sex or a physical fight. I just don't know which one.

"I'll be like... ten minutes at most," Lar says, squeezing past me and around the kitchen table, rerouting to the front door. He gives me a look that screams vulnerability and urgency. "Please don't kill Sal, and don't let him kill you. Okay? I'll be back in a jiffy."

I blink at him, running my tongue along the inside of my dry mouth. This is not going to go well. "Okay," I say anyway. I can already see the headline on the newspaper-- 'Masked Streamer, Sally Face, Brutally Murders and Chops Up Rising Streamer, VioletViolence, With Kitchen Knife.'

Larry nods at me, pinches his lips together in a moment of concerned hesitation, then disappears through the front door.

I stand in the empty kitchen for a moment, watching the back of Larry's head through the front door window. "In a jiffy..." I murmur to myself, recalling the most soccer-mom words I've ever heard come from Larry's vicinity. It was so odd, I mean he would never say something like that, but here we are.

The house is empty aside from myself and Sal. What the hell am I supposed to do? Watch The Office?-- well, that actually doesn't sound bad at all.

I can literally do anything I want, though. I have been given the most opportune opportunity to act upon my will as I see fit. With that in mind accompanied by the suspiciously good conversation a certain blue-haired individual and I shared on the plane, I think I have an idea of what I could do. And I know I'll have a willing partner. 

This will either end in a homicide via kitchen knife or an orgasm. I'll take my chances.

A sly little grin fights its way onto my lips as I spin on my heels, trekking over to Sal's room. His door is closed, giving him an ample amount of darkness to hide in while gaming or sleeping or whatever he's doing. But for me, it's the ample amount of darkness to create a moody setting. It's perfect.

The cold, metal doorknob sits comfortably in the palm of my hand as I give myself one last chance to think about this. I really shouldn't do this, but the timing will never be this good again. With everyone moving to LA, I may never get a chance this convenient since someone will always be around.

That's the last little bit of encouragement I need to twist the knob and slowly push the plain, white painted door open.

The wood squeaks on its hinges, making Sal turn his head up from his PC. His dark, shadowed eyes meet mine. They go from curious to a bit miffed in half a second— but he doesn't say anything, really just ignores me and turns back to his setup.

My heart races. He didn't turn me away or tell me to get the fuck out of his room. That's a good start. But that also means I can actually follow through with my very sudden plan— a plan which has no plan. I didn't even brainstorm what I could do because I genuinely didn't think I'd get this far.

I watch him closely, noting the way his computer casts a cool, blue glow against his prosthetic. His hand moves the mouse around and he clicks on various things, really paying me no mind at all.

My teeth clamp onto my bottom lip as I step past the threshold of his room, grabbing hold of the door and slowly closing it behind me. Once it latches into place, I wait, simply observing the man with my back to the door. For good measure, I turn the lock. You know, just in case I manage to get somewhere.

And he still doesn't look my way. The fact that he's ignoring my presence right now makes anticipation build up within me. My heart thumps a little faster than it already has been. My cheeks feel warm, I can't keep my hands still. It's like my brain is kicked into overdrive, forcing me to take notice of every little thing.

I lick my lips and take a step forward, scratching at the skin on my knuckles. I take another step, then another, my body growing warm with anxiousness all because I may stand in front of this man, present myself to him, and come to regret it. I really might embarrass myself. Just because we agreed doesn't mean he wants me at this exact moment.

But before I'm even really prepared, I'm standing right beside him. And he's sitting there without a care in the world, comfortably propped up in his gaming chair and pulling up different comments on what looks to be YouTube.

I've done about all I can for right now, but we are on limited time. So I watch him for a moment. He has to know I'm right here— I wasn't quiet, I didn't avoid his field of vision. I'm right here.

And I still get nothing.

Time to think. Should I say something insulting? That usually gets him riled up. Maybe then, one thing will lead to another.

I bounce on my heels for a second as I think up a quick insult. "Is this how you waste your time? Figured you'd at least reply to some of your fans if you were going to read their comments. Kinda shitty of you." Low blow probably. I don't really mean it, but I'm sure he'll take it seriously. His fans mean a lot to him, it's the best way to gain his attention.

But Sal doesn't even react, only scrolls through a few replies under a comment and clicks 'like' on a some. He doesn't flinch. Doesn't look at me. Never makes a sound.

I roll my eyes. Playing hard to get are we? He fusses at me for not complying all the time— he's such a hypocritical asshole. I hate that I'm into it.

I swallow thickly, putting my hands behind my back to try and hide my nervous fidgeting. "Sal," I try, cringing a bit. That was desperation— he has to know that.

Again, nothing.

He really must be trying to piss me off, that or he isn't interested at all. But thankfully, the zero interest half doesn't stink like I was afraid it would. Instead, it spurs me into action.

He can ignore my words all he wants, but he can't ignore me.

"I'm going to touch you," I warn because consent is important. "If you don't want that, you need to tell me."

I wait a good thirty seconds but he stays silent.

I pinch my lips together then grab onto the armrest of his chair, pulling it back just enough to place my body between him and his computer. He simply looks up at me with disinterested eyes, so I go further, fueled by the spark in my soul and the rage of him purposefully pretending I'm not even there.

I take a step forward and put a gentle hand on his shoulder for balance, then easily slide myself onto his lap. His thighs are warm beneath my own, his skin smooth under my fingertips. The dark ink on his biceps contrasts beautifully with the milky color of his skin and it's quite an honor to finally run my hands over his art.

I watch the way my fingers drag down his arm then up again, returning to his shoulder. I'm on top of him and he still hasn't said a word, still hasn't touched me. At this point, I'm yearning for something— anything.

The only good sign I'm getting is that he hasn't pushed me off.

I glance up, looking into his blue eyes that are darkened by the shadows of his room. They're watching me closely, no ounce of emotion reflected in them. He's just observing.

My other hand travels to his prosthetic face, gripping onto his jaw in the way that he does to me so often. "Think you can ignore me?" I whisper, a little smirk quirking my lips despite how badly I wish I could contain it.

A slight furrowing of his brows is what I get in return.

Ha, got him.

He still doesn't say anything, but I've piqued his interest at least.

"Larry's gone," I say next, my eyes traveling to the rough prosthetic in my hands. I run my thumb over the underside of his jaw, feeling a number of scars.

"I assumed so," he says, voice a bit deeper than it normally would be and toneless like it seems to have been all day.

My gaze meets his again, and this time there's a little fire in his pretty eyes. There's desire, interest, slow-building exhilaration. I love seeing this look on him.

"Mhm," I hum, moving my other hand from his shoulder to the side of his neck. "Are you going to sit here and ignore me like the asshole you are, or are you going to have mercy on both of us?"

Sal slowly blinks, eyes traveling over my form, drinking me in like I'm the last drop of water on earth. "You called me an asshole for a reason," he bites out. "Don't expect much. Unlike you, I can actually hold out."

"But what's the point of holding out?" I counter, tilting my head to the left. "Larry's heading to the apartments. We have about ten minutes. That's enough room for one of a couple options. Stop being a little prick and do something."

"More like twenty. Larry takes his sweet ass time." Sal's eyes narrow. "You think insulting me is going to coerce me into this, you little bitch? Thought you knew our dynamic well enough by now." My words are getting to him. That's exactly what I want.

"I do know our dynamic," I whisper, leaning my head down so that my face is level with his. I look into his cerulean eyes and they gaze back at me, one pupil dilated. Then, I bend lower until I'm at the nape of his neck, his hair tickling my jaw.

I use the hand holding his face to tilt his head up and away from me, using the angle as leverage to place my lips onto his warm skin.

I hear a muffled sigh from him in response and it takes everything in me not to smile.

My mouth moves slowly along the side of his neck, placing meaningful, wet kisses along his throat. But when I get to the hilt of his tattoo, I bit down gently.

He flinches at the feeling of my teeth digging into his skin, then completely aborts his mission to ignore me completely.

Sal's hands fly to my waist, one gripping tightly onto my hip and the other trailing up my back and into my hair, gripping the strands tightly before yanking my head back.

My teeth are ripped from his neck immediately and Sal pulls me away from him by the base of my neck. I gasp, staring into his captivating azure eyes from just centimeters away. His prosthetic nose bumps my mask's and he holds me there without a word.

His eyes trail down my face and heavy breaths follow his gaze. His cold fingers are curled into my neck, his nails digging into my skin.

I swallow, wondering if maybe I should have just minded my own business, stayed in the living room and waited for Larry to come back. Maybe I pissed him off.

I lick my lips and blink at him, my mouth gapes open as I try to find something to say. He's silent. It's not awkward, just scary. Scary is ten times worse.

Sal must see the regret and fear in my eyes because his own eyes lessen their harsh glare a bit and then he rasps out, "Can I touch you?"

Every inch of my body goes rigid with shock, anticipation. "Yes," I say, my voice barely above a whisper. My fingers tighten ever so slightly on the underside of his jaw while my heart runs an entire marathon in my chest. Now is not the time to get nervous because I sweat when I'm nervous. I need to be horny– not nervous.

Sal takes a deep breath, eyes set on mine. I feel his chest rise ever so slowly, then go back down the same exact way. The pause between us is utter agony and I feel like I'm going to start spazzing out or something. Honestly, with the way I'm sitting on top of him, I might just fall over and die on the spot. That feels less incriminating than whatever is about to ensue.

Cool fingers grasp onto my thigh, his palm flattening against my skin. His hand drags up to my side, followed by his other hand leaving my neck to grab the other side of my waist. The feeling of him touching me, just like he'd asked, fills me with memories I tried so desperately to forget just a couple weeks or so ago. This is deja vu in the best way.

In one swift motion, Sal lifts me up and plops me on top of his desk. I brace myself with my hands on either side of his keyboard that lays behind me. Questions of concern start flowing through my brain because this is an odd place to be.

"Don't knock over my shit," Sal breathlessly informs, eyes glancing up to me. HIs hands move to the waist band of my bottoms and I suck in another anxious, anticipatory breath.

I nod quickly, watching him with wide eyes as he looks down at my waist, his hands circling to the front of my stomach and fumbling with the button of my shorts. Oh my gosh.

I gulp, looking at anything but the man between my legs, currently pulling down the shorts I'd traveled in. His cold fingers brush along the outside of my thighs, causing goosebumps to rise all over my skin. He's slow, purposeful, dragging this out to get whatever reaction out of me that he can. It feels like my heart is about to explode.

I have no idea what he's about to do, he doesn't warn me either. I don't have the guts to watch this scene play out. The prospect of his dilated pupils, messy hair, and that glare in his captivating eyes is too much-- so much that warmth pools between my thighs before he can initiate anything.

"You look scared," he murmurs and I flinch at the gentle, comforting tone he uses with me. I've never heard something such as this come from him and be directed at mebefore.

"I am," I answer honestly, licking my lips while his fingers slowly pull my shorts down my legs. I lift myself a bit to aid him, shivering when my bare legs meet the cold surface of his desk. "A bit."

"Why?" Sal asks, hands pressing onto my thighs. With how warm my skin is and how cool his fingers are, the contrasting temperature is enough to spark an aneurysm. He drags those hands of his up my legs until he reaches my panties, hooking his digits into them.

I shake my head, chin quite literally tilted up to the ceiling. I'm not quite sure what has me so scared. Am I afraid of myself? Him? Getting caught? Being dropped again?

One risky hand leaves my hip and Sal's prosthetic comes into view. He's hovering over me, in a standing position now. His hair falls onto my shoulders, shielding us from the rest of the world like a curtain. I blink up at him, breath caught in my throat as a rush of chills invades my body.

"Hey," he says. His voice is a bit on edge, but it's concerned. So concerned that it distracts me from my own fear for a moment. "You're okay," he continues, his hand gripping onto my chin and pulling my head down so we can be eye level. I look between his bright eyes-- his eyebrows are risen a bit, as if to communicate to me that I can trust him. But can I?

"I'll take care of you. If you want to stop, if you don't want to start-- let me know. Say anything and I'll end it immediately." He tilts his head a bit, eyes glancing over my face. This is different. This looks vulnerable. "If I made you uncomfortable at all, I--"

My head shakes in opposition. I don't even have to think about it. "No, it's not that. It-- I trust you." The words spew out of my mouth and I immediately regret it. Something smug takes over his expression and I press my lips together, grabbing onto his wrist connected to the hand that's still holding my chin. "I trust you with this. If I was tied to train tracks, I wouldn't even think of calling you." I narrow my eyes at him to exemplify my point. His eyes squint as if he's... smiling? I'll ignore that. "But you've never... made me uncomfortable. You always ask. You always check. So..."

I watch him nod slowly, our gazes never disconnecting. He seems to contemplate what I've said, measurably formulating his next move. "Do you want to talk about what's stressing you then?"

My head rears back and my eyebrows furrow, his hand falling away from my face. "What brain eating amoeba has overtaken you?" I blurt out, holding a hand out between us. It's incredibly odd-- this is out of place. "You are never concerned about me-- what is this?"

If you can't tell, I'm not a fan of change. I greatly prefer stability even if it's toxic.

Sal drops the caring act almost immediately, his eyes rolling so hard that I'm worried they'll sink into his body. "I can't go down on you if you're freaked, can I? I wouldn't even feel comfortable doing that. I'm an asshole, not a monster."

I pause, every facial feature relaxing as his statement slaps me in the face. Key words: go, down, on, you, asshole, monster. Yep, only monstrous assholes go down on their enemies. I'm the very brave, very eager, very shocked recipient of this going down.

I take a deep, shaky breath, blinking at Sal who watches me with what looks like a raised eyebrow. "Okay," I breathlessly whisper. "How are you-- are you..." Why am I rambling? What kind of answer am I looking for? Obviously the prosthetic is about to come off and I just have to contain the desperate, whore-like rage within.

"Shut up, Vi," he chuckles over my nickname, grabbing onto my thighs and tugging me to the edge of the desk as he sits in his chair again. My fingertips press into the wooden surface while my heart threatens to pound its way through my ribcage. "Just let me taste you."

Cue internal screaming. I'm so going to faint-- and the addition of watching his pretty guitar-playing hands leave my skin to unbuckle his prosthetic is pushing me to astronomical heights. I don't even exist anymore. I'm just a wisp, a little phantom fairy watching her favorite sex movie play out in real time. It's called Faceless Fixation. She's the Fellatio Fairy. I don't even-- whoever is writing my life needs to give me a break.

I'm shivering like I have hypothermia by the time Sal carefully pulls the prosthetic off his face, making sure to not mess up his hair. And then he glances up at me. Bright eyes hesitant, sort of wide. Eyebrows risen just a bit and lips pressed together like he wants to say a thousand things but can't. He looks so nervous and it's a moment we can both share.

For reassurance (I think we both need it) I smile at him. Just a slight upward tilt of my lips as I press my thighs together. He's so beautiful. Every scar, every indentation, every feature, every little freckle. Just wow-- he's a sight to behold.

Sal's gaze flits to my lips, then down to my legs and he grabs onto them again, purposefully pulling them apart. His black polished nails dig into my skin as he gazes down at my underwear. I'm so used to watching his reactions and feelings portrayed only through his eyes, but watching the way his jaw tenses and the moment his lips part like he can't wait any longer makes me feel like I'll implode. 

His fingers run up my legs to my hips, dipping into my panties and pulling them downward. I gulp over the sight, relishing in the deja vu. How kind of him to not rip these this time. 

I lift myself up as he shimmies them down my legs, finally pulling them from around my ankles and holding them up for me to see. I blink, warmth rushing to my face at his boldness. And Sal, well-pleased, quirks a little seductive smile at them before switching his gaze to me.

"I haven't even touched you and you're soaked," is what he murmurs, eyes dancing over my half naked body with very little focus on my face. It's like he's glued to what hides behind my clenched thighs, eagerly awaiting what he'll find between them. "You're inflating my ego way too much," his voice is a bit louder this time-- darker, more sinister. The pronunciation of his words shows off charming, slightly crooked front teeth and sharp canines. I'll never know how I haven't ascended already.

I shiver, trying and failing to hide my reaction. But it doesn't really matter, seeing as Sal caught onto it anyway and his hooded eyes are on mine, a dangerous glint clashing with the hypnotizing azure shade of his irises. 

His hands are on my legs again, fingers roughly squeezing my skin. He isn't putting off his plans again though. When he separates my legs and I try my best not to push him away out of fear, Sal leans forward and presses his lips to the inside of my left thigh.

I take a deep, shuddering breath as I bathe in the feeling of his soft, jagged lips moving along my sensitive skin. I commit the image to memory, absolutely astonished over the way his blue eyes are closed while he inches closer and closer to my pussy.

I'm unable to take a full breath at this point, my body is tense while I try to hold myself in an upright position, pathetically falling apart as his mouth dances along the inside of my thigh like he's studied and perfected each step he takes. His hands are molded into my skin, they've become a part of me. He's pressing my thigh up to his face, leaving the most inebriating kisses. I wish he would stop teasing me already.

At the same time, I'm obsessed with the way he's handling me. Delicately, carefully, but he's in full control and making me wait. Testing me. Seeing if I'll push him, hoping I'll give him a good reason to punish me.

Sal's eyes open again, glancing up to meet mine. I suck in a breath, watching as he opens that dirty mouth of his and bites into the sensitive skin at the top of my thigh.

I hiss, wincing at the slight pain but my eyes never leave his. They could never. And he loves that, takes it as a challenge because those sky blue eyes close and he bites down harder, sucking my skin into his mouth to leave his mark. 

Some kind of satisfied, sickeningly delighted feeling swells in my chest at the knowledge of having a mark from him on my body. It's primal, it's a little weird, but I adore the idea and maybe he does too. After what he said to me about North on the flight to Nockfell, I'd guess he's more than happy to stake his claim even if it's invisible to the outside world. 

Sal finally pulls his teeth from my leg, revealing a gnarly, dark purple mark in his wake. He places a quick, soothing kiss to the abused skin before trailing his way closer to my pussy. He masks his destination with more wet kisses and bites and I'm so worked up by now that a light sheen of sweat has formed on my forehead. I can't be doing this-- this is complete torture.

"Sal," I groan out, flinching at the sinful tone of my voice. It makes him pause his movements as well. "Please," I tack on, the word quiet and agonizingly pleading.

He hums against my skin, eyes zeroed in on mine. I hate being so direct, it's terrifying, but it's worth it if it'll end up with his tongue buried in me, right? 

"Beg for it," he says lowly, a slight rasp to his voice. His tone makes me shiver, as well as his words and I would drop to my hands and knees if he told me to right now.

My lips part upon hearing him and I release a shaky breath, thighs drawing together until he stops them with his tight grip. My heart is running a marathon, my limbs are trembling and I'm wondering if maybe this is all just a really awesome dream.

"Please," I repeat, voice coming out as a whine. For once, I don't regret it because this is what he wants. "I'm desperate." I don't know how else to portray to him that I need this-- the wait is nearly excruciating. "I need to feel you."

Sal pulls away from my skin, tongue lapping at all of his bite marks before a sadistic smile pulls at his lips. "How much do you hate me?" And he's waiting, waiting for a wordy explanation of my distaste for him. But now, with the way things have changed between us-- even if it's slightly-- describing my loathing somehow feels harder.

So I snort, trying to coerce him into putting his mouth on me again regardless of the location. But all the shivers, waiting, and very slow building orgasm is slipping away into the distance. "A lot," I whisper shakily.

He gives me a look, eyes narrowed and lips pressed together as if I've disappointed him. "You can do better than that, Vi. Where's the fire?" He leans toward the thigh he hasn't captured with his mouth yet and skims his teeth along my skin. "Should I give you an example?"

I lick my lips, a sudden fluttering in my chest making me feel light headed. I hesitantly shake my head-- the longer he isn't paying attention to me, the farther I am from cumming. I can come up with something to say can't I? Of course I can. He's infuriating enough.

"Alright then," he mumbles monotonously, finally ditching my thighs. He yanks me a bit closer, eyes still rifling through my soul. "Then tell me. And if you stop," he warns as I swallow against the pounding in my chest due to his positioning, face mere inches from my sopping cunt. He's dragged this on long enough. "I stop. Keep that filthy mouth of yours moving."

He waits for me to launch into a monologue of detest. His mouth so close to my clit, breath tickling my skin and forcing a quiet little whimper from me. 

"I fucking hate the constant foul mood you're always in," I force out, feeling my heart leap into my throat the second the words leave my mouth. Because Sal keeps his promise and with an inebriating grunt of approval, he finally attaches his lips to my clit, tongue running over it like he's desperate to soak up every inch of what I have to offer.

The feeling of his mouth on my pussy is incomparable to any other type of satisfaction in the world-- this is what I've waited for. And he happily makes up for the lost time, expertly flicking his tongue over the bundle of nerves and sucking it farther into his mouth. He moans against my cunt, hands dragging up my thighs to cup my ass and force me even closer to him. He squeezes my skin, a reminder to keep talking.

I dig up all the things I can't stand about him, slathering them across my brain so I can tell him about it. "You're a brick wall. No matter what I say, you refuse to listen. How come you're never open to hearing anyone out?" I whimper between words, squirming around on his desk and trying my damn hardest not to ruin any of his belongings.

Sal lifts my legs over his arms, pushing them onto his shoulders and I swear I'm about to combust. The way his tongue maps figure eights and circles around my clit does nothing to help, only sends me further toward falling apart.

I squeeze my eyes shut, fingers curling over the edge of his desk, heavy breaths and quiet moans falling past my lips no matter how badly I wish I could keep them inside. "You have some kind of God complex. You think you're right about everything, have to be in control of everything and I can't stand it. I can't stand you and your constant need to have everything you want."

His teeth graze over my clit and my mouth falls open, waves of pleasure rolling through my body like I've never experienced before. He moves downward, his tongue buried between my folds and licking up every bit of my arousal that he can get. Upon getting a better taste of me, he moans and I can feel the vibration of it everywhere, all the way up to my fingertips.

"I hate how easily you turn me on, how wet I get just from a simple touch," I admit, teeth clamping down onto my bottom lip as his tongue explores the inside of my pussy like he's been starved of me for far too long. His nails dig into my skin, the action eliciting a stinging sensation that only adds to the pleasure he's giving me. This is everything. "And you're so unfair. So pretty, so damn attractive with that horrible personality of yours. Why can't you be pretty through and through?"

I open my eyes again to watch him, drowning in the prospect of his face buried between my thighs, cheeks flushed and hair a mess. I watch as he drags his mouth up to my clit again, drawing patterns and shapes I don't care to know over the bundle of nerves. The rough, slick feeling of his tongue on such a sensitive place is addicting. So long as he's around to bring me to new heights like this, I don't need anything else. Maslow's hierarchy of needs has never been so wrong-- this is my sole need.

I can't help myself-- I reach a hand out, my fingers burying themselves into Sal's hair. It's soft. Just as soft as I knew it would be. And he doesn't seem to mind, only continues to suck on my clit and abuse it with his tongue. I close my hand into a fist, lightly tugging on his hair. I need something to hold onto.

"And your stupid fucking mouth," I groan out, sucking in a breath that never fully fills my lungs. His tongue dips into my pussy again, making another little groan follow my first. My thighs are clenched tightly at this point, quaking furiously. Sal never tries to stop me, doesn't calm me. It's clear how much he enjoys bringing me to ruin. "All the awful things you say, so many dirty words and you are so good with your tongue. I've never craved and loathed something so much in my life." 

Sal smiles against my pussy-- I watch in pure amazement as the corners of his lips curl upward like what I said was everything he's always wanted to hear. It's so lewd, so perverted and I absolutely will never forget this moment.

One of his hands lets go of my ass, trailing down my thigh again but moving to the inside this time. As his teeth gently nip at my clit and his tongue laps at my pussy, the tips of his fingers press against my opening, a silent request for more of my profession of hatred. A profession I'm more than happy to give him.

"I can't imagine how much I'll hate the way you fuck me just because I know it'll be better than any sex I've had before," I tell him, watching his mouth move against my cunt with furrowed brows and my lips parted in intrigue. Oh, he's so good at what he does. 

Sal's eyes meet mine again. Eye contact with him when he's in such an erotic position is incredibly intense. I feel like my entire body is going to crumple before he can finish me off and it all counts on if he's able to hold me up or not. But as soon as his cerulean gaze meets mine, two of his fingers sink into me. The action is slow, drawn out, and drags a nasty moan out of me in turn.

Sal whimpers against my pussy, taking care of me like he promised he would. When his fingers reach as far as they can go, he curls them, causing me to flinch at the sensuous feeling. There's so much going on to the point that every inch of my body feels impossibly overwhelmed. 

My sensitive clit gets sucked into Sal's mouth again, but then he pulls away. His fingers make up for the absence of his tongue, pounding into me in the same salacious way he's done before.

"Is that all you've got?" he grumbles breathlessly, glazed eyes glaring into mine. This is the expression I'm used to with him-- anger and dominance. 

I choke on the breath I try to take, my thighs pressing into his neck as his fingers slam in and out of my soaked cunt, digits only pausing their relentless pace to curl into me. I try to fight against my one working brain cell, try to form words for him, but-- "I can't." is all that I'm able to create, the two short words coming out as an imploring cry.

Sal stands, finger-fucking me into an alternate dimension. He hovers over me, his hair brushing my shoulders and neck. I watch him, an absolute mess beneath him but I can't look away-- even through the panting breaths that morph into whimpers and moans. 

His eyes glance between mine, seemingly contemplating something in that meticulous mind of his.

"Yea, you can, gorgeous," he grinds out behind clenched teeth, using the hand that's gripping my ass to press me against his chest. Our even closer proximity somehow forces his fingers deeper into my pussy, his thumb rubbing my clit. "Tell me more." My mouth is dry, I'm going to cum soon, and hopefully I don't actually fall over before that.

Sal takes a page out of my book, leaning closer to me and nipping at the skin of my throat. A little gasp falls past my lips and I finally let go of his hair, dragging my hand down to his neck. Those fingers work me to the core, never ceasing their movements and pushing into me with so much perfectly applied force. 

His mouth moves along the side of my neck, his lips still wet from my juices. I have no idea what gave him the confidence, but I'm not mad. Everything that couldn't be done with his prosthetic can be done now and he's taking advantage of it. "Speak," he snaps, tone not so gentle or comforting like it was when this first began. "Or else."

My mind is blank. "I'm about to cum," I begrudgingly whisper, completely overtaken by his fingers thrusting into me and his thumb focused on my oversensitive clit.

I shut my eyes, my free arm wrapping around his shoulders. Every inch of my body is tense, senses heightened and alert. I don't think I can possibly hold on any longer-- I doubt Sal needed my confirmation to tell that I'm close.

His digits curl into me again, repeating the action. I follow up with a loud whimper, my nails digging into the skin of his neck as he sucks on the skin behind my ear. I wish he'd have ditched the prosthetic sooner because I've really been missing out.

The hand still gripping onto my butt retreats to my stomach, fingers disappearing under my shirt and crawling across my ribs to my bra. He treats it as if it isn't even there, hand easily dipping beneath the fabric. His palm envelops my breast, squeezing gently and massaging the skin. It's such a considerate touch compared to the way he treats the rest of my body-- he knows exactly where the sweet spots are. 

"Cum," he commands, lips brushing the shell of my ear and fingers pounding into my sore cunt, thumb running over my hardened nipple.

My head drops onto his shoulder and with one more curl of his fingers, I do as he says and fall apart in his arms. I burst almost instantly, doing anything to keep myself silent over the feeling of his fingers gently caressing the inside of my pussy, riding me through my orgasm just like he did the first time. My teeth sink into his shoulder, a muffled whimper following soon after. Sal tenses up in my arms, a pleasured breath falling from his mouth and fanning over the side of my neck.

"Good girl," he purrs into my ear, lips skimming over the warm skin at my throat. He leaves one more sloppy kiss to my neck then pulls away to look into my eyes again. I can hardly hear anything he says as my teeth are forced away from his shoulder, still reeling from the orgasm that slammed into me nearly unannounced. My limbs feel like jelly as chills run up my spine. "You listen to me so well," he continues. I can't even look into his eyes; I just watch the way his lips move. How his tongue presses into the back of his teeth to pronounce a syllable. His sharp canines that undoubtedly left their own bruises on my skin. 

I gulp, unable to peel my eyes away from the mouth that masterfully brought me to climax. For the first time ever, I wonder what his mouth would feel like against mine. How soft his scarred lips would feel, not on my skin, but captured by my own. What his tongue would taste like. What his teeth would feel like nipping at my lips. 

Sal doesn't move away from me-- keeps our close proximity with his nose nearly brushing my mask's. He slowly, delicately pulls his fingers out of me but only continues to gaze into my eyes.

This is dangerous territory. Very dangerous. Because the impossible is coursing through me right now and I... somehow can't find it in me to hate him in this exact moment.

But then he blinks. Stands to his full height, moving away from me. His azure gaze turns to the desk I'm sitting on and he grabs my panties, offering them to me. Not an ounce of emotion evident on his face. I'd always wondered what he'd look like simply because I was curious if his face gave away his emotions better than his eyes could. It's pretty impressive how he's able to keep a straight mug though, RBF and all. Especially when he lifts the hand he fingered me with to his mouth and licks my cum off. He doesn't even look at me as his tongue runs up the length of his digit, just turns away from me and walks to the other side of the room.

I'm floored, jaw dropped and pussy wet. Again. That's really fucking hot.

I watch him strut away, follow his movements as he drops to his haunches and opens up his suitcase with his clean hand. He grabs something then faces me again, beginning to walk back with a finger still in his mouth.

My chest tightens at the sight. He can't be doing this to me. Not when Larry is going to be home any minute-- he needs to keep both his hands at his sides.

Thankfully, Sal has some mercy on me and finally finishes cleaning his fingers, eyes darting up to mine again. He walks up to me, right where I'm still sitting on top of his desk and drops fabric onto my bare thighs.

My brows furrow and I look down, grabbing lace. I lift it up, unfolding it to see that it's a near replica of the lace underwear he'd ripped off of me in Vegas. Only it's a completely brand new pair. No rips, no issues. My heart swells a bit at the gesture-- he bought a new pair like I'd told him to. I wasn't even serious, but he did it anyway.

I puff out my cheeks, contemplating what to say. Thank you's are virtually nonexistent between us. My eyes flit up to meet his again and he stuffs his hands into his pockets, watching me.

"You taste good," he nonchalantly comments, causing an infuriating blush to heat my cheeks.

"Thanks," I murmur, holding up the lace panties to show that I'm thankful for them too. "You taste pretty good too." He does. I'll have to return the favor to him when I get the chance.

A barely audible snort comes from him and I almost smile. 

"I'd fuck you, but Larry will be back any minute and Ash probably isn't far behind him," he says, turning on his heel and walking toward the door. "I suggest you put your clothes back on. Panties are clean, I washed them."

My eyebrows raise and I pinch my lips together. Huh. "How kind of you," I say half sarcastically. Only half because it's helpful that they are clean-- it's almost like he knew he'd place me in a predicament where I needed fresh underwear. "You trying to kick me out?" I add. Of course he is, I'm just trying to make my way out of here as awkward-less as possible.

"Hell yea," he says proudly, "I have shit to do."

"Are you calling me a distraction?" I ask, looking toward him as I shimmy my underwear and shorts up my legs then start working on the button.

Sal tilts his head, hand on the doorknob. "And a mild aggravation."

"Oh, wow," I gasp, feigning surprise. "Mild? I must be working my way onto your good side."

"Fuck me good enough and we'll see how far you get," he replies, eyes watching my every move but face still unreadable as I begin walking toward him. 

I roll my eyes. Of course. I pinch my lips together and give him a disinterested look. This is my lesson to never try to have a casual conversation with him again. He clearly doesn't want it, which, fair. Our agreement is sex, not friendship. "Okay," I say dramatically when he opens the door for me. "Bye, Sal."

The man nods his head, acknowledging the shift in the room. His eyes stay glued to mine like they have been the entire time I've been here. Now that I'm not distracted by his mouth on my pussy, I realize that this is an odd thing for him to do. He looks at me every once in a while, but not in such a... scrutinizing way. 

He purses his lips and says, "Bye, y/n."

Every nerve-ending in my body suddenly shuts off. Everything is still. I have no thoughts for a moment, no physical reaction. Just stillness. I don't breathe, I don't move. I just watch him.

There's no way— he has to have mixed up my names. It has to be that.

And then everything hits me. Sal Fisher just said my name. And not the fake one that I've been hiding behind. He said my actual name— the one that's on my birth certificate. And now my hands are shaking, my heart is racing, my breaths are uneven, and I feel like I'm going to throw up.

"What the fuck," I say shakily. I'm not ready for this. I'm going to completely switch his thought process around-- "did you just say?"

The look in his eyes changes, they light up a bit as if he's caught me. And still he decides to mess with me. "Huh?" he innocently asks.

Okay, I'd really like to wake up now.

My eyes narrow. So that's the game he wants to play? This isn't the time and I don't have the mental capacity to handle this. Not only am I recovering from a mind-blowing orgasm, but I was just getting over the overwhelming anxiety I suffered from yesterday.

"I'm not y/n, if that's what you're thinking," I rush to tell him, even adding in the fakest little smirk I've ever slapped onto my face. Anything to get him off my tail, whatever I can think of to save my ass. This really can't be happening to me.

He's still watching me speculatively and it's making my brain itch. "You know," he finally starts, voice disgustingly pleased. "I went out on a limb with that one." I watch in horror as a little smirk begins to grow on his face. I don't want to accept it yet, I really don't, but I think I'm fucked and not physically. 

At the end of the day, he's still managed to fuck me in multiple ways. I cannot stand Sal Fisher.

"What are you even talking about?" I ask him, clearing my throat quietly while taking a safe step out of his door and into the living room. I try my best to keep my eyes on him while extinguishing the fear from my gaze. If I act horrified, he'll sniff me out instantly. That is, if he hasn't already.

Sal chuckles deeply— it's, shockingly, an amused and prideful one rather than something sick, dark, and twisted. He leans against the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest. I try my best not to adore the way his scars stretch with his laugh and the sight of his pretty teeth. "Any other woman would have assumed I was sleeping with someone else if I called them by another name," he says lightheartedly, tilting his head down a bit. "But you didn't. And that can only mean that I'm right."

I open my mouth to decline, fear thrumming through me. He caught me red handed. I can't fucking believe this.

"And don't try to deny it, you won't change my mind. I've been very sure of who you are for months now."

My head slowly begins to shake of its own accord. He never fails to shock me. "How..."

Sal shrugs. "You couldn't have timed your introduction more horrendously. Think about it," he says, chewing on his bottom lip. "I bitch at y/n over a phone call, then the next day, a wild VioletViolence pops into my life and isn't too surprised by my shitty personality. The second you were added to the Discord server, I had my suspicions." He shrugs nonchalantly, like the confirmation doesn't bother him in the slightest. "I talked it over with Larry and Todd too. They're pretty sure of your identity as well. They were just nice enough to wait for you to tell us on your own." His eyes narrow, sly like a fox. "But I'm not nice and wanted to know for myself. Wanted to scare you a bit too."

I swallow over the bile rising in my throat. Scare me, he did. I have no idea what to do with myself. I must look like a deer in headlights nearing its death sentence. "It... it doesn't bother you?" I decide to ask in a small voice, unable to blink as I watch him closely.

That same smug little smile is still lighting up his marred face as he says, "Regardless, I still can't stand you and I'll still fuck you stupid."

-----------

A/N::::::: OMFFGGGGG I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS CHAPTER FOR AGESSSSSS PLEASE!!! more specifically the end of it! i've had this last scene written since like... 2022 o_O 

i want to give a HUGE thanks to my very good friend, Phoebe, who inspired me to write the catalyst of the smut scene with this AMAZING piece of art that they drew :3 i am soooo so grateful for having the opportunity to see the art in general, but getting to write it too??? OMG so incredibly grateful <33

side note: this is my first time writing a smut scene like this one-- well, actually any time i write a different kind of sex it's new for me LMFAO i am exploring EVERYTHINGGGG and i also have no idea if this is any good. so like last chapter, if y'all could give me some tips or things you like and didn't like, i would GREATLY appreciate it :3

i'm going catch up on my neglected homework. as always, have a wonderful morning/day/evening/night. my heart belongs to all of you <3

[lunarswritings]

Vyn Moving to Stellis

Vyn prior to chapter 1, what was his adjustment from Svart to Stellis?

Warnings: spoilers to main stories and most Vyn card stories

This was inspired by a reblog of my inaccurate headcannons post, so if you talked about this in your tags, this is for you!!

——————————

Vyn is someone who is usually prepared for 99% of situations as we know

Now idk what the stellis language is so we’re just gonna say it’s Chinese since that’s the official game language??

He probably learned SOME Chinese beforehand

Vyn could have became fluent in Chinese or English since I think royals have to become bilingual?

Or he started learning it a few months prior to moving

In my opinion I think he knew he wanted to leave Svart, but he didn’t know where to go

For the first time in awhile, he made a sudden decision that was not planned

I think he wanted to leave somewhere that was close to Svart, but the idea of being completely away from Svart became more appealing as nobody would know his identity

So he got a job at Stellis and left

I can imagine him at the airport super lost bc he’s still struggling to read Chinese

But English being his second language came in handy thankfully

I have a feeling that like most people, Vyn struggled understanding people speaking Chinese really quickly. I wonder if he would ask them to speak slower or just nod the whole time smiling bc I see him doing both for some reason

Of course a few months later he got used to it and managed to speak at the same pace

With him being royalty, money wasn’t a problem at all

I mean have you seen his house?? It looks so expensive, and the fact someone comes to clean his house?? (Mercury in Retograde card story) He had an advantage clearly

But I wonder

When Vyn finally entered his new place, and stood in the empty living room

Did it finally hit him, that this was his new life?

This was the life Vyn was yearning for after all

And now it was finally within reach

Sure he was being tracked in the beginning months (Fetters of the Path card story) and had to use some tricks to get his dad to leave him alone

Sob sob

Anyway

I wonder how Vyn got his new name

His full name is Vilhelm Albert de Hasperan (Gentleman’s game and fetters of the past card)

His father used to call him Albert, and we know he doesn’t have the best relationship with him

So I assume he crossed out Albert immediately

So he was left with Vilhelm

Imagine if he chose names that started with V

Vincent, Vince, Victor

I bet Vincent was his final option before he settled on the shortened version of Vincent which was Vin, and replaced the i with y

Back to Stellis:

The language barrier and the idea of him sticking out like a sore thumb with his silver hair and foreigner look definetly was overwhelming for him

We know that Vyn is fluent in Chinese, but not completely. (Eternal Whisphers card)

So I assume he was struggling a little bit during his first few months in Stellis

Tbh I think he even accidentally offended someone somehow

Perhaps using a informal phrase at an old person, or using a phrase for old people on a young woman

Definitely took care of that though #pshycatristthings

Vyn probably felt a little self conscious as he usually stuck out like a sore thumb bc of his hair and eyes

But he later got used to it and realized people actually were fond of it (the dr richter fan club cough cough)

Oh my god imagine how he had to learn Stellis customs

I don’t have any ideas of what customs Stellis could have had. But I imagine it to be like the “take off your shoes when you enter someone’s home” and Vyn just walks casually to the living room with his shoes 😭

“Are you not going to take off your shoes Dr Richter???”

“Pardon?”

During Giann and Vyn met I’d like to think Giann sort of guided him towards Stellis customs and traditions

Making them even closer friends :c

Basically Vyns doing great we love him sm

[acetechne]

hi i was informed that some of you guys wanted to know more about DM so i made a VERY BRIEF history of their relationship (half of which is completely ignoring each other because they live in completely different worlds but occasionally have mirrored experiences).

if you’re curious about the history, @quatschmachen tends to cover the NL side and I tend to cover the AB side and we don’t mind trying to answer or speculate about it. You can also check out the (rough!) timelines i drew up for procan for bert and ben. again want to stress that this isn’t a one true canonical reading, we just think it’s neat.

I’ll transcribe my messy writing and have some additional notes below.

---

1940s: [AB] just barely got provincial rights after 3 decades and is now about to strike oil. [NL] forced to give up independent nationhood and join Canada. [Didn’t notice each other at all].

- I think this is interesting to note because they have sort of reverse, mirror images of each other. Ben lost nation status after the war (after being ignored for literal centuries and getting the barest acknowledgement of responsible government from England in the 1850s) because Britain was concerned that NL would have another economic and political crisis as they did between the world wars where Britain had to step in and govern, even though NL was so economically profitable during and after the war that they were lending money to Britain rather than the other way around. Britain and Canada worked together to confuse and persuade NL to give up independence.

- Bertie meanwhile (and the other prairie provinces) actually had fewer provincial rights of control than all other provinces that had already joined confederation. Getting control of resources between the world wars was just in time for the major oil strike at Leduc in 1947. This combination of being perceived as a “lesser” province and sudden economic weight to throw around is still part of this chronic struggle AB has had (which has now manifested into AlBerTa SoVerEigNtY!!11)

---

1970s-1980s:

[AB] record profits during oil crisis, record losses when made to subsidize Canada] [National Energy Policy] [NL] losing out hydro profits to QC, struggling to benefit from offshore oil exploration. Catching record amounts of fish...

- Bert’s rich bitch phase really took off in the 70s, which is the era that people today still look back on with nostalgia and no small amount of bitterness. Because oil was so expensive around the world at this time, Canada essentially interfered in the industry, made Alberta sell oil at a discount to the eastern part of the country and taxed sales to the US, something they did not do with hydroelectricity exported from BC or Quebec. Alberta still felt like a colony of Canada rather than an equal partner in confederation for this reason.

- Likewise, NL was having its own battles with confederation during this period. Churchill Falls was a hydro-electric dam built in the 50s in Labrador, one of the largest in the world at the time. Electricity would be transmitted through Quebec and sold from Quebec to New York - but Quebec had little desire to share the windfall profits with Newfoundland. (This isn’t even touching on how the dam affected the people of Labrador, particularly the Innu). Likewise, the federal government had control of offshore resources, again cutting NL out of profit from oil exploration; equally urgently, the other offshore resource that had supported NL for the past 500 years, the fishery, was under federal control as well. The 70s saw the number of fishermen double and the (overestimated) stocks of fish rapidly decline...

---

1990s:

[AB] major recession and cuts, leaving farms for the oil patch. [NL] moratorium on cod fishing forced him to move west for work.

[opinions of each other] [AB as] “humourless tight-fisted entitled brat”, [NL as] “lazy, uneducated job stealer who won’t shut up”

- In 1992, Canada declared a moratorium on the cod fishery which immediately led to a mass out-migration of young people from NL and Atlantic Canada and leaving behind an aging population dependent on federal support. Meanwhile, a series of cuts and privatizations at the provincial level in Alberta and a pronounced lack of interest in diversifying the economy away from oil and gas (thanks Ralph Klein :/ ) meant leaving the farm for the oil patch was (and is) a more viable (though short term) lucrative option for both Albertans and other provinces looking for work.

- So they meet at last. And they absolutely despise each other.

---

2020s:

((what on EARTH is going on))

AB: please don’t leave me

[NL] thinks this is the funniest little meow meow on earth

- I don’t know exactly when the relationship between these two mellowed out. It was pretty tense still when I was growing up, and I wouldn’t say there was really a mutual appreciation between the two until maybe after the 2008 crash or so? But that’s me trying to apply arbitrary dates. There’s obviously still some tension today, and there’s also tension between those who stayed and those who went back home etc etc. It’s Complicated.

- but it’s interesting so i like to write them complaining and fighting over dumb things because it makes me laugh :) but I do think they would have reached some point where they started looking at each other’s histories and going “hey wait same hat”. Okay different hat... but you know what I mean. But I think they see pieces of themselves in each other and vice versa and it makes for an interesting dynamic (regardless of platonic or romantic interpretations).

- but yeah basically bert was socialized by bible thumping evangelists and then by coke dealing oil cowboys so you can understand why he has this weird complex about relating to other people in healthy ways, he’s just lucky that ben is old enough to find his quarter life crisis absolutely hilarious and actually somewhat sympathetic given that he understands what independence and interdependence actually mean from his lived experience. so yeah.

[cherrygarden]

I wish pms had kinder ways of manifesting itself instead of, yknow, making me cry at work in front of my managers

[slightlymore]

oh no, mr suh, please don't spank me

johnny x fem reader

cameo: taeyong

genre: !!smut!!, roommates au, fake enemies to lovers, a little tiny fluffy angst bc it's my brand apparently

warnings: a lot of mutual teasing, finger sucking, sexting, solo f and m, spanking, marking, dry humping, hand job, fingering, slight cum play, not protected, overstimulation f and m, multiple orgasms, penetration, manhandling, oral m and f, tiny degradation (sparse use of ‘little slut’), rough

words: 7K

it’s finally here!! this one is very juicy haha good luck I guess :) keep your panties dry challenge

taglist: @comically-sleep-deprived​ @strawberrymilkandcigarettes​ @theworld-accordingtocasey​ @kibumingi​

_____

"Johnny, get lost." 

You raised your eyes to meet Johnny's peaceful face in the middle of the corridor, one of them still twitching for waking up so early. 

He smirked and didn't move. 

You made a step on the right. 

He did the same. 

"John," you made a step on the left. 

His body kept blocking your way. 

"Why? Are you busy?" His voice was deep and thick like honey and in other circumstances you would have wanted to listen to it forever. But that morning you woke up without a single ounce of patience. 

You sighed and rolled your eyes. "Yes, unlike you." 

"I'm also busy."

"Oh yeah? Doing what?" 

"Getting between your legs."

In spite of everything, you couldn't help but snort once. 

He has been playing that game for weeks now. A little touch here, a little compliment there, but it was the first time to see him this pushy. 

"I told you that I don't want to sleep with my roommates," you walked around him, teasingly hitting his shoulder with yours. 

You weren't surprised to feel his fingers wrap your arm and turn you around. 

"You don't have to sleep with me. I can sleep well on my own. I need you awake."

Johnny let his palm dance on your skin until it got to your throat, his thumb rising slowly and caressing your lips. You gulped and looked down at his hand before locking eyes with him again. 

"You know what I mean," your breath and moving mouth tickled his finger and the twinkle in the man's eyes amused you. You were about to add something else but decided to do something instead - giving him new ideas to continue jerking off to later, since his dick will still be dry for a long time. 

But when you softly pulled his thumb into your mouth, you didn't expect to be the first to get that excited. 

Johnny let out the ghost of a sigh, staring at the way your pursed lips dragged around his skin, the softness of your tongue licking the tip after giving it a good suck. 

"Hm. Knew you were a little slut." 

You chuckled and raised your hands to press them on his chest and push him away before turning around with the intent of leaving him hot and bothered. 

But he was quicker. In a second your wrists were blocked by his strong fingers and his head was shaking. 

"No touching."

You narrowed your eyes amused. 

"Oh yeah? And what should I do for you to let me touch you?" 

His fingers intertwined with yours and if he didn't have that lustful expression on, the gesture would have been almost sweet. 

"Beg?" 

You opened your mouth in a slightly surprised o. 

"Me? Beg? I don't beg." 

Johnny let go of your hands with a smirk and ghosted your chest until getting to the hem of the oversized t-shirt you wore to bed. 

"Stop me," he whispered but all of a sudden you couldn't concentrate on forming words and frankly, you realized you didn’t want to either. 

So he knelt in front of you and slipped his fingers underneath the fabric, revealing your thighs and underwear, pushing it up until exposing your stomach. His breath tickled your skin first then you felt his lips, and when he placed the first kiss you got goosebumps all over your body. Johnny chuckled slowly and palmed your legs as if getting rid of the bumps but it only added to the heightening sensation his mouth was building up. And when he took out the tongue, circling your belly button, you breathed in deeply and grabbed his hair. He liked it since a pleasant grunt formed on his lips, which were going down until meeting the cotton of the underwear, then on one side, tackling your hip with slow kisses. 

Right when you were about to close your eyes and moan, you suddenly couldn't feel Johnny's lips on you anymore. You stared down just to see his annoying smirk, his locks still in your hand and his eyebrow raised upon seeing the little wet patch formed on your panties. 

He got up with a swift movement as if he had finished with all of his to-do list for the day and smiled. 

"I'll go make breakfast," he announced and walked around you whistling.

_____

Said breakfast was being consumed in silence. 

You had to change your underwear because the situation between your legs got too much out of control and when you came back Johnny already made coffee and pancakes. With little glances at his face you wondered how come he was that calm and, the most important thing, how come there was no tent in his gray sweatpants. 

Did he really think he could start a war and win? You scoffed while angrily munching on the last pieces of pancakes. 

"You okay?" he licked his lips after finishing his coffee. 

"Of course," you replied dryly, standing up and grabbing your plate directed towards the kitchen like a tornado. 

"Your vibes are kinda dark though?" he raised his voice for you to be able to hear over the clanging of dishes. 

"Mind your own business," you came back, the violent shift of air as you passed near him almost making his hair swoosh. 

_____

Tight clothes? No, more. Lingerie? Uh uh, more. Naked? Maybe too much. Towel? Fuck yeah, towel. 

Lips juicy, eyes glowing, and the plan was rolling as you stood inside the bathroom, grinning at yourself in the mirror, hands virtually rubbing against each other while physically they were wrapping your damp skin with the towel. 

Hidden behind a corner like a predator about to attack its prey, you waited to hear Johnny's steps coming towards the bedrooms. A little noise, calm and deep, arrived to your ears first. One step forward and the collusion was perfect. 

"Oh, sorry!" you bumped into him, the fabric shifting on your breasts, your fingers prudishly trying to cover yourself and - oops - failing. With hands pressed on your chest, the swell of it was even more visible now, the last drops of water shining on the skin and falling slowly inside the cleavage. 

Johnny remained silent, not even a tiny ‘sorry’ escaping his lips, his eyes completely trained on your body. Then, when you were already tasting the victory on your tongue, he suddenly looked behind you as if not wanting to look anymore. 

You shifted your weight from one foot to another, waiting for a more grand reaction but Johnny kept on a composed face. 

After a few seconds of silence, you were about to leave, lower lip between your teeth as your plan didn't make him go rogue. 

But then he whispered something under his breath and when you least expected it, he pushed you against the wall. The air got knocked out of your lungs making you breathless.  "You like dangerous games?" 

His tone was delicious, lips so close to yours, and you absolutely wanted to drink it all in. And he was right. You did like dangerous games and you also liked to win. 

"Yeah. And revenge as well." You finally smiled as one of your fingers slowly dragged on his chest, smoothing the creases of his white t-shirt. "Am I making you feel some type of way, John?" 

The man scoffed, staring you down. "Not really." 

"You can't even look at me in the eyes though.”

"Eyes? Something else requires my attention now, baby girl." 

The instant delicious burst of pleasure of his hands cupping your now nude breasts and his thumbs circling your hard nipples made your knees buckle. The towel, slowly falling until stopping around your waist, was dangerously close to getting to your feet if Johnny's hips weren't pressed against yours. 

One step back and you'd be naked in front of him and that wasn't your plan at all. 

No, no, wait. You were supposed to make him feel things, not the contrary. 

Then why were you letting him touch you like that? 

"Are you sure you're doing this for me and not for yourself?" Johnny smiled at your light panting and twitching fingers, pressed on his arms. 

"Enough," you whined, mind already blurry, so close to beg him to take you like that against that same wall. 

Johnny stopped and took a step back, his hands quickly going to your hips preventing the towel from falling any further. 

"I don't have to say it since it's obvious. But I've won. Again." 

You pulled the white fluffy fabric from his fingers with a huff and stormed into your room, the echo of Johnny's chuckle ringing in the whole corridor. 

_____

Disastrous. 

You couldn't believe that you got that hot and bothered when Johnny should have been the one salivating and losing his mind inside his room. 

Throwing away the towel you looked around for your clothes when a buzz from the bed made your head turn. 

"Are you touching yourself?" read Johnny's text. You snorted. Unbelievable. 

You weren't going to touch yourself. No, sir. You already lost a second time. You weren't about to give Johnny that satisfaction as well. 

From You: and if I were?

From Johnny: thinking about me?

From You: you wish.

You laid down, face illuminated from the phone and fingers hovering over the screen, somewhat invested in the conversation. But just a little. 

From Johnny: come on. do it.

You rolled your eyes amused and changed his display name. 

From You: you first 

From Evil dick: hm, I love winning though.

From You: you talk a lot for someone that's fucking his fist right now :)

From Evil dick: is this what you're imagining?

From You: yeah 

Johnny read the text and didn't reply anymore. You could not prove that he was taking care of his stiffy but the thought of him doing so made you feel triumphant. Perhaps it wasn't a full win but you could give yourself half a point. Only half. 

Because when you put your phone down, you couldn't stop your hand from sliding between your legs either. 

_____

You needed at least one win. 

Just once, only once, you wanted to see Johnny's honey eyes tremble under your touch. 

And the corridor was your arena apparently since the next day another opportunity arose. Short and quick. 

You smiled at him exiting his room and he smiled back. His lips were about to part and probably ask if you enjoyed yourself the previous night but no sound came out of them as your fingertip gently caressed his chest. It was barely there, a slight touch going slowly down. 

His jaw muscles tightened when you reached his pants and he jolted when you pulled his belt towards you. 

"It was a little crooked," you feigned innocence, your knuckles definitely brushing something that made him inhale silently. 

"I'm making breakfast." You smiled and walked around him, leaving Johnny alone in the middle of the corridor just like he did the day before. 

_____ “That’s not a win.”

You threw your head back on the couch arm, looking at Johnny upside down, the popcorn kernel you were currently about to eat stopped against your lips. 

“That was a win,” you replied. 

The man put his hands on his hips. “You just touched my belt.” 

You chuckled. “Yeah. Apparently that’s enough for you to cum, baby boy.” 

Johnny’s cheeks rose in a tight smile as you licked the salt and butter from your fingers. The look in his eyes didn’t go unnoticed to you and you loved it. His gaze caressed your face and open lips, then your exposed throat and low cut t-shirt. You knew he loved that angle. Could you possibly get two wins on the same day? 

“Want some popcorn?” you asked, handing him one kernel. Johnny put his hands on the couch’s arm, bending his frame down and taking it with his teeth. You looked away nonchalantly as his lips touched your fingers, and you grabbed another kernel for yourself. 

But Johnny was quicker. 

One hand on your jaw, pushing your head back even more, he took it from between your lips in a spiderman kiss. 

You couldn’t breathe for a few seconds, mouth open and skin burning from where his lips touched it. 

When you locked eyes again, you noticed him munching with a little smile. Still hovering over you, a few strands of hair covering his eyes, he swallowed and whispered. 

“I win.” 

_____

“Oh, no, I’m not drinking.”

Taeyong looked at you with the cocktail glass in his hand as if you grew two heads. “Y/N not drinking?” 

“I can’t drink. I’m on duty.”

You were still sitting on the couch in a ball, eyebrows furrowed and concentrated eyes. 

Taeyong took a sip from his drink then shrugged and took a sip from the one he prepared for you too. 

“On duty for what?” he plopped near you making you wobble slightly to the side. 

“War.” 

“On Johnny?” Your head snapped towards his innocent eyes. “You know about it?” 

The boy chuckled. “Want me to give you a few tips?”

He smacked his lips and shifted his weight to be more comfortable, his lids dropping as if about to share some juicy secrets. 

You imitated his position and leaned in to hear better.

“Make him jealous with me.” You blinked in silence a few times then sighed, pushing Taeyong away. “Are you trying to get between my legs too, now?” 

The other continued chuckling. “It was worth the shot. You can try stuff like touching him randomly, then.” You huffed. “You think I’m a newbie?” 

Taeyong sipped from both of his drinks again. “Then what about making him believe he got you so you can attack when he feels powerful?” 

_____

"Oh, no. I have flour on my clothes."

The dough you were working was still sticky so you got a handful of flour that accidentally went on your bottoms right when Johnny made his appearance in the kitchen. 

He looked down and, indeed, noticed a light layer of dust covering your black leggings. 

“Could you please clean them up for me? These are my favourites,” you pouted at him.  

Johnny smiled and sighed, getting closer and slapping your butt once, then twice, then again, until all the flour was cleaned up. 

"There's no reason to be this aggressive, you know?” you bit your lower lip. 

"But you like it this way. Don't you?" 

Another spank and you mewled, the sound making Johnny hum in appreciation. 

“You’re all clean now.” He stepped back and presumably stared at your ass with the excuse of checking for some more flour. 

“I didn’t say you could stop,” you whispered and almost regretted - key word ‘almost’ - saying it as your flatmate approached you again, his sudden dark aura making your skin crawl. 

“You want me to continue?” his voice caressed your ear, his tone highly amused.  

You acted as if gathering the courage to confess that, yes, you wanted him to spank you but, oh no, you were so shy and he was so strong, you couldn’t do it like that and in public!!? oh no, you couldn’t take it. 

“N-no, it’s better if we stop here. I- I don’t think I can handle it. It will make me go crazy.”

Even if not seeing him in the face, you could almost physically sense Johnny’s puzzled aura. Laughing to yourself you wondered what kind of reaction he would come up with this time. 

He didn’t say anything for a few moments and when you were about to turn your head to check on him, you felt his chest on your back and he engulfed your body with his arms as he pressed his hands on the counter in front of you. 

“Okay,” he whispered into your ear. “I’m giving this one to you.” 

_____

From Evil Dick: I can hear your vibrator from the kitchen

From You: I’m not using any vibrator right now From You: maybe it’s taeyong lol 

From Evil Dick: lol From Evil Dick: it’s definitely coming from your room tho

From You: you’re imagining things you wish were true

From Evil Dick: I don’t imagine you getting off on vibrators From Evil Dick: I like to be included in my fantasies :)

You: typing You: deleting You: typing You: deleting

From You: fuck you

From Evil Dick: fuck me yourself From Evil Dick: 4-2 for me

Johnny smiled brightly when you barged into his room. 

He was laying down in the dark, with only the phone illuminating his face. 

“Are you already done?” he asked teasingly. 

You stopped at the feet of his bed with crossed arms. 

“I’m here to fuck,” you announced. 

Johnny remained with his mouth open as his brain processed the information then laughed. 

“I don’t think you will,” he sat up, resting his back on the bed frame. The movement lifted his t-shirt a little, exposing the waistband of his boxers above the sweatpants and his lower stomach skin. 

You didn’t add anything and got on your knees on the bed instead, slowly crawling towards him until getting between his legs. Then you sat on your heels and took away your shirt. 

Johnny followed your frame and his eyes grew wide seeing you naked underneath the falling fabric. You smiled and his loss of words and you imitated his position, sitting in front of him and opening your legs to drape over his. 

“Holy shit, Y/N,” he whispered, eyes trained to where you slowly dragged your fingers. 

Inhaling deeply you closed your eyes and threw your head back, gently drawing circles around your clit before pushing two fingers inside of you. 

“Shit,” Johnny repeated and you whined, the wet sound telling him how you felt. 

“I didn’t say I’m here to fuck you. You can’t touch me nor can you touch yourself. If you do, you lose,” you instructed breathless and Johnny dug his fingers in the mattress underneath him. 

You smiled and bit your lower lip, fully enjoying his expression, his eyes looking as if drinking you in and were making you go crazy. 

But then he smiled too and it threw you off. 

In a second his hands were on your thighs as he pulled you towards him from underneath your knees until reaching the hand between your legs. He grabbed your wrists and blocked them in an iron grip. 

“You can’t touch yourself either.” 

You were breathing heavily, naked and so close to Johnny that you could almost feel the warmth of his body on your skin. 

“What’s with that face, baby girl? You wanted to cum?” he cooed at you. 

You bit your lower lip and shook your head. 

Johnny pouted. “Hm, baby girl can’t even lie well. Are you sure you don’t want to feel my fingers inside of you?”

You closed your eyes. “I don’t.” 

The other pulled you towards him by the wrists again until being able to whisper on your lips. 

“What about my tongue?” 

“Fuck, John, plea-” you interrupted yourself. 

Johnny smirked. “What was that? Please?”

You shook your head again. “No.” 

“I definitely heard you say please just now.” 

Panting and on the edge you considered just not caring about anything and fuck that man on the spot. 

“Truce,” you whispered. Johnny tilted his head to the side. 

“It’s not over and no one wins or loses this time,” you explained. 

“That’s convenient for you,” he teased. 

You huffed and fully sat on his lap, rolling your hips once on his hard cock. 

“I think it’s convenient for you too,” you commented after Johnny’s trembling sigh. 

His eyes grew darker and his hands grabbed your ass, pressing you on himself even harder. Your arms wrapped his neck and you hid your face into the crook of it, trying to conceal your whimpers. 

The rough material of his sweatpants did wonders to your sensitive clit and you didn’t need a lot to start shaking in Johnny’s arms. Your hips stopped as you moaned, digging your fingers into his shoulders but his hands on your waist forced you to go on. The overstimulation felt delicious and you didn’t care what words you mumbled into his ear, jolting every time his cock rubbed on your raw clit again and again. A few deep grunts and Johnny’s erratic movements told you that he was close too. You kissed his jaw then the skin next to it, then the corner of his lips, breathing in the air he breathed out then moaning once as he took his cock out and pumped it in his hand, spurts of warm cum coating your lower stomach. You looked down at the way it dripped between your legs and felt dizzy from pleasure. Johnny read your mind and quickly collected the drops fallen on your clit, drawing circles around it quicker and quicker until he had you shaking for the second time, head fallen on his shoulder and teeth digging into his neck skin. 

You remained like that, breathless and fucked out until you finally could manage to raise your head again. “This never happened,” you whispered and Johnny nodded amused.

_____

You yelped as Johnny’s wide palm slapped your butt unannounced. "John! I'm near the stove!" 

"Good morning," he smiled sweetly as he retrieved two coffee mugs from the cupboard. 

"What if I burnt myself?" you accused him even if you both knew it was highly improbable. 

"I would have kissed the bruise until the pain disappeared," he placed the mugs down and walked around you, positioning himself behind you and trapping you with his arms. One hand turned the stove off and the other danced on your stomach pulling you against him. 

"When will you stop?" you tried to steady your voice since your ass rubbing on your roommate's crotch wasn't exactly calming. 

"When you'll beg," he whispered in your ear with his playful tone. "But I'm not trying to do anything now. You were so caught up into staring at me that you didn't notice the eggs and I'm here to save them." 

You put your tongue inside your cheek to prevent yourself from smiling. Johnny breathed in as if trying to add something else but the sound of a voice made you both jolt. 

"What are you guys doing so early in the morning?"

You almost forgot you had other roommates besides your sworn enemy poking at your back with his cock. 

"Teaching Y/N how to make good eggs."

Taeyong raised one eyebrow at the scene in front of himself. "Yeah. Adding a sausage does make your eggs taste better." 

"Oh my God," you mumbled, turning around and pushing a chuckling Johnny away. 

"Do you want to know my recipe?" Taeyong raised his voice since you were already leaving the kitchen. 

"Two sausages--," then a smack and a fit of laughter as Taeyong promptly apologized for even daring to assume he could add himself into the equation. 

“Come on. I thought you were in a good mood this morning by the looks of that bright red hickey.”

“Yes and I don’t share what’s mine.” You almost stumbled on our own feet in the corridor.  

"I'm out of town this weekend, by the way. If you want to go all out…" was the last thing you heard and the one giving you the best idea for your new plan. 

_____

It was almost two in the morning and Johnny was nowhere to be seen. 

You rolled over on the bed with a huff then kicked the blanket staring at the lingerie you were wearing with sudden disgust. 

It was the weekend and the house was empty - the perfect occasion for you to play with Johnny. And where was he? Probably fucking somebody else. 

You were sick with anger. 

Getting out of the bed - his bed where you waited for him - you stripped out of the sexy lace and grabbed the first t-shirt you found. It was one of his and even though it was clean, it still smelled like Johnny. 

You got back under the covers and crossed your arms on your chest, eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed. 

It wasn’t jealousy. You didn’t care if Johnny fucked other people. It’s not like you even fucked properly in the first place. You were just irritated that your plan didn’t work as you wanted it to. 

With an argh you turned on your side and hugged the other pillow, Johnny’s scent engulfing you all again. 

God, he made you so mad. 

_____

The first thing you realized as you woke up was the fact that your room didn’t have a black accent wall. 

The second one was Johnny’s arms around you - one behind your head and the other one thrown around your waist. 

You were sleeping on your back, one hand placed on top of his and the other one on the veiny forearm. With one finger you followed one of them until reaching the bicep then you slowly turned your head to look at him in the face. 

He didn’t close the blinds when he came home last night so the sun was shining brightly behind him, making him look like an angel. 

You smiled for a moment, staring at his calm expression and listening to his regular breath before widening your eyes in horror and snapping out of your sweet thoughts. 

What was that? 

You didn’t care about John Suh and you definitely didn’t care about the way his caramel hair was draping on his forehead. 

“Mm,” his raspy voice accompanied his strong arms pulling you towards him as you tried to slip out of the bed. “Where are you going?” he mumbled, eyes still closed and very much half asleep. 

You sighed and relaxed on your back again without a word and when Johnny rolled you over to face him you didn’t resist it. 

“Did you sleep well?”  “Where have you been?” you spoke on top of him. 

The words, or maybe your tone, made Johnny’s eyes open in an instant. 

You weren’t looking at him, your eyes were low on his chest instead. He raised one hand to cup your cheek with the intent to make you look at him but you flinched. 

“What’s going on?” he questioned. 

You sighed again and shook your head. “Nothing. I’ll make breakfast.”

As you tried to get out of the bed again, Johnny’s arms didn’t want to leave your body. “Y/N. Wait. Stay.” 

His hand got to your face a second time and this time you locked eyes with him. 

“I was out. Like most weekends,” he explained. 

You gulped and nodded. “Good.” 

“No, it’s not good. You don’t seem to like that.” 

You didn’t add anything, neither denying nor confirming it.

Johnny’s eyebrows met in the middle. “You’ve never had a problem with that.” 

“I don’t have a problem with that,” you finally managed to get out of bed and Johnny let you go this time. 

“I didn’t fuck anyone, if you’re wondering,” you heard him say as you walked the few steps towards the door. 

“I don’t care if you fuck people, Johnny.” 

“You do.”

Your feet stopped in place. “I don’t.” 

“You’ve just made the same expression you put on when you claim that you don’t want me to touch you and we both know that’s a lie.” His voice was calm but stern. “Just admit it.” 

You just resumed walking and exited the room. 

_____

It was weird and not something familiar to your gut, but every time you saw Johnny, you felt the urge to either kiss his lips, cry on the floor, punch his face or run away. 

The first was understandable, even if weird; the second one was absolutely weird and you had no idea what the fuck was going on with you; the third was also highly understandable. 

But it was the last one that you chose. 

So when Johnny entered the kitchen you got out. When he opened the door to his bedroom you closed yours. When he sat on the couch, you got up. 

Until he couldn’t take it anymore and barged into your room unannounced. 

“Hey! Knocking maybe?” 

You were on the bed, scrolling through your phone and looking absolutely impresentable. 

“Talk to me.” 

You rolled your eyes. “I’m not in the mood to play right now, John.” 

He walked over and sat on your bed. 

“I don’t want to play. You’re avoiding me.” 

“Look, it was fun for a while, but I don’t feel like continuing the little game we had going on. Let’s go back to how it was before.” Y

ou hoped you sounded convincing to him because you didn’t sound convincing to your own ears. 

Your words did make Johnny put on a sour expression though and you pretended to not notice. 

“Okay,” he said after a moment and you retrieved your phone from the bed, expecting the conversation to be over. 

Yet, when he placed his palm on your thigh your hand stopped in mid-air. 

“What are you doing?” 

He looked down to where his finger slowly caressed your skin, creating little goosebumps all over it. Then Johnny looked up and whatever expression you had on, it was enough for him as he suddenly got up and left the room. 

_____

“Brr, this house is colder than the heart of my elementary crush after he refused to share his food with me.” 

Both you and Johnny ignored Taeyong’s words, busy rolling your peas into your own plates. 

“What happened while I was away?” 

“Nothing happened,” you mumbled. 

“Hm,” the boy commented, munching on his food. “Wait,” he stopped, struck by realization, “ you mean like - nothing - happened? This is why you’re both mad? You didn’t fuck?” 

You rolled your eyes and got up with the plate in your hands. 

“She’s mad because she doesn’t want to admit that she has feelings for me.” 

The bomb that Johnny threw made both Taeyong and you shake in your places.

“What?” you asked incredulously. “I don’t have feelings for you.” 

Johnny calmly put down his fork and looked up at you. 

“Well, I do.” 

You opened your mouth in a silent shock while Taeyong initially gasped then soon after shrugged, whispering under his breath. “I mean, it was kinda obvious in his case.”

“And I don’t like the fact that you think I have space in my mind for other people besides you,” he continued. “Because it’s not true.” 

“Woah,” Taeyong rested his back on the chair as if watching a soap opera. 

“Did you really have to do this in the living room at dinner time?” you asked him after a few seconds of opening and closing your mouth like a fish. 

“Oh?” Johnny raised his eyebrows. “You want to take this to the bedroom instead? Let’s go,” he got up suddenly. 

“Aw, guys, come on. You always hide the funniest stuff from me!” whined Taeyong seeing you leave. 

“You know what I mean!” you replied to Johnny but still followed his quickly moving frame inside his room. He closed the door behind him and crossed his arms on his chest as if waiting for you to talk. 

“What?” you imitated his position. 

“Say something?” 

“I don’t know what to say! What does one say after all of that?” you questioned. 

“Do something? I just said I am in love with-” 

In the end you did something and that something was wrapping his neck with your arms and kissing him deeply. 

Johnny remained still for a moment as if shocked before finally relaxing his arms and tightly pulling your body towards his. 

Your mind was empty and you had no idea what was going on but after a few seconds of tasting Johnny’s tongue you were already thrown on the bed. It creaked under Johnny’s force and you jolted at the way he dragged your pajama pants down. No sexy outfit and no lace lingerie to meet his eyes, yet they were full of such intensity and lust that you realized it didn’t matter at all. Hands in his hair, you raised your bust to connect your lips again. 

“I was so fucking mad you weren’t home that night. I thought I was about to go crazy,” you breathed out while Johnny was palming your torso, lifting up your t-shirt and cupping your breasts. 

“I know. Punish me then. Show me your anger,” he joked.  But his reply turned a switch into your body and you managed to push his chest away from you. He smiled at your reaction and rolled over on his back, letting you straddle his lap. 

“I’m going to tease you so much until you’ll be the one begging me to touch you.”  

Johnny caressed your thighs. “Hm. I don’t need any teasing. You’re breaking me with your mere presence. Please, please, touch me.” 

Your breath got stuck in your throat and you couldn’t see anymore. The grunts leaving Johnny’s throat as you bit into his neck were so hot that you wondered what stopped you from letting yourself hear them before. And when you moved to his chest, then stomach, littering his skin with love bites his muscles twitched under your touch. 

You had no words to describe how it felt to have him inside your mouth. Heavy, hot and so present, you choked only on a third of it. 

“Shit,” you mumbled, taking it out and pumping it instead with your hand. 

Johnny loved it anyways and he looked at you with such intensity that you wondered if you could make him cum with only a few kitty licks. 

“It’s alright. You don’t have to,” he breathed out. 

“It’s alright. I know I have a monster cock and you don’t have to suck on it if you can’t handle being deepthroated,” you mocked him trying to imitate his tone. “Well, I want to and I will.”

And so you listened to Johnny’s airy chuckle, broken by the feeling of your mouth on him again, this time deeper than before. 

“You love a challenge, huh?” 

You would have said that, yes, you loved it and you loved to win, if it weren’t for his cock sliding down your throat making it difficult to talk. 

“Fuck, baby, that’s- oh shit-,” he grabbed your head as you bobbed your head up and down a few times before you couldn’t take it anymore and let it out with a lewd plop. 

“Baby?” you raised one eyebrow at him. 

“You don’t like it?” 

“Do I look like a baby to you?” you smiled with wet lips, your hand restlessly pumping his cock hard and fast. 

Johnny grunted again, his hips rising to meet your touch even more. 

“Hm, no, you look like a little slut right now,” he agreed with a smirk before his expression changed again into, you realized in that moment, the best view you’ve ever seen in your whole life. Head thrown back and completely at your mercy, Johnny came hard, his whole body twitching as his cum spurted on your hand and face. 

“I think I won this time,” you pumped him a few more times before letting him go. “Hm, you drink so much coffee,” you smacked your lips after licking his cum off your fingers. 

“This wasn’t part of the game.” 

“Yeah, well, I’ve just decided that it was,” you shrugged. 

Johnny grabbed his discarded t-shirt and cleaned his stomach. “So, are we playing now?”

His tone got dangerous and his expression made your wet pussy even drippier but you had no time to worry or form a single thought about it since you suddenly found yourself with the face on the mattress instead. 

You turned your head sideways to be able to breathe and Johnny’s hands didn’t even try to be gentle when they pulled your panties down. 

The loud smack arrived before the sensation of his big palm on your asschecks could. When you finally felt the burning sensation, another slap added to that. 

Your fingers grabbed Johnny’s blanket, preparing yourself for the third spank, absolutely not expecting his tongue inside of you instead. 

“Fuckfuckfuck-” you mewled but your sounds only made Johnny more ferocious, hands opening you up, eating you out as if he’d been dying to do so for a long time. And it was true for yourself too, but no imagination of yours could have realistically portrayed the way he was making you feel and no fingers of yours could reach as deep as his did, fingering you fast, tongue not stopping for a second, not even when you violently went over the edge with the loudest moans you’ve ever heard yourself emit. 

“You win, you win-,” your rough throat tried to stop him from torturing your overstimulated clit and you heard him suck on his fingers after he let you go. 

“Okay, I’ll take it. But this is just the beginning. Are you going to let me fuck you, baby?” he caressed your ass, going down to your waist and cupping your breasts. 

The movement made his cock poke at your entrance and you imperceptibly opened your legs even more. 

“Yes, please,” you whispered back, turning your head to meet his lips as he lifted your chin. 

“Hm? Say that again?” 

“Please.” 

His tip easily slipped inside but the stretch still made you hiss through your teeth. Johnny shushed you, kissing your shoulder and neck until he bottomed out. “You can handle it, right baby?” You tried to nod but his first thrust knocked the air out of your lungs and you let your head fall down again with a whine. 

Johnny moved again and again then stopped with a grunt. “Beg a little for me again.” 

You bit your lower lip, his tip pressing right when you needed it to and you wanted him to do it non stop. 

“I don’t think I will beg again,” you whispered with a smile and started to move your hips instead. It was a sloppy and slow job, nowhere sharp and quick as Johnny’s, but you had to win again. 

The man let your ass bounce on his stomach a few times, staring at the way you were stretched around him then he grabbed your waist and left you all empty. 

You whined, clenching yet nothing being inside of you anymore. 

“I said beg.” 

His breath was now on your spine, his wet mouth placing kisses on your skin, making it shiver and taking some of it in his teeth, sucking on it until he was satisfied. 

But you remained silent and he clicked his tongue at your stubbornness. In a single go he filled you up again and this time he never stopped. 

He was breaking you in half and if you hadn’t already had tears in your eyes, this would have been the time to start crying from pleasure. 

“Holy fucking shit--John-” you cried out, breath rhytmically broken by his deep thrusts and when he added his slaps again, you just lost it all, cumming so hard that the neighbors were probably ready to call an ambulance. 

Johnny stopped balls deep inside of you, feeling the way you clenched around him. And when you thought it was over, when you barely started to hear again, he moved as hard as before, shushing you and pressing his fingers roughly into your skin. 

“You can handle another round, right baby? You’re such a pretty little slut with a bigger attitude than she can carry. This is nothing for you.” 

Fucked dumb, you could only nod and Johnny started to lose control himself, hair sticking to his sweaty forehead, some drops falling from his collabones to his chest. And when you felt his cum spurt inside of you, you finally begged, repeating it again and again. Johnny didn’t stop and you knew that you wouldn’t be able to move at all the next day when your muscles contracted for the nth time in so little time, collapsing completely after Johnny slowly slipped out of you. 

His breath felt wet and boiling on your face when he dropped beside you. 

He swallowed a few times trying to catch his breath. “Fucking finally. I knew it was going to be epic. Why did you refuse me for so long? Look what you missed.” 

You would have snorted if you had the force so you resorted to just let out a whine. “I refused so I couldn’t see this. I have a big attitude? Well, you have the biggest ego in the world.” 

Johnny turned his head towards you. “And cock.” 

You rolled your eyes and accepted his hands pulling you towards his chest. 

“Ew, you’re sweaty,” you mumbled. He kissed your forehead. “And you love it.” “No,” you denied it, “butIloveyou,” you added quickly. 

Johnny shook your body in a hug. “Hm?? Say that again.” 

“I didn’t say anything!” 

That grown man pouted at you making his eyes wide and glossy. “Please?” 

“Whoa,” you smiled, “are you acting cute at me right now? After killing me with your monster cock?” 

Johnny nodded cutely and repeated the plea. 

“Okay, okay. I-- love you.” 

He chuckled happily and tightened his arms around you again, squeezing you in an almost mortal hug. 

“Again.”

You sighed realizing that you were suddenly dealing with a child. 

“I love you.” 

And you repeated it again and again until you were sure that he finally fell asleep. 

With one hand to caress his face you finally indulged in staring at him, fully realizing what that weird sensation in your gut was. 

“I really love you.” 

Your whisper was tiny and barely audible but Johnny smiled. 

“I know. And I love you too.”

[lavynrose]

Artem and his S/O confessing at the same time pt. 2

Title: Dedicated

Pairing/s: Artem Wing X Reader

Pronouns: Gender Neutral

Genre: FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF TOOTH ROTTING FLUFF

Warning/s: grammatical errors

Notes: ok so!!! thank you so much for waiting <3 one thing i'd like to say is that i recommend reading part 1 before this bc it creates a build-up for the story's conclusion. There are some parts here that needed context from part 1. Enjoy!

part 1 here

He couldn't ask for more.

The sunset spilled all around the theme park, the golden intricates of the the railings sparkled than ever before. The orange radiance of the solemn sun gives the park an even more golden glow.

Artem looked around, taking in the seemingly perfect view of what can be only described as serene. The laughter of groups of friends, families walking hand-in-hand, couples giving their significant other loving looks, people enjoying themselves left and right, the quaint smell of hotdogs and popcorn.

You spending your time with him.

The sunset made this picturesque scenery even more breathtaking, and he could come here everyday if only allowed.

Right now, right in this very moment, everything is glowing.

Especially you.

"That was really fun!" the enthusiasm in your voice never fails to make him feel the same. He loves seeing you have fun, without a care in the world. He admits, he also enjoyed getting splashed by water on the raft ride.

He unconsciously offered his arm to link with yours and when you took it as you gazed at him, he's more than satisfied.

You fit so perfectly in his arms, it feels as if you're the missing puzzle piece he never knew his being had. Even having dried after getting soaked from the raft, the warmth that your touch radiated fills his senses with comfort.

This moment of getting to spend time with the person he profoundly longed for was enough for him. Enough for now. You don't need to know his affections for now.

Does he really need to let you know?

His feelings?

It'll probably make your relationship awkward. He's not ready to risk the sweet smiles and playful looks you direct towards him just for his own selfishness.

It doesn't matter. He'll love you even if you won't, anyway.

He then stopped in his tracks, you followed suit. Not caring about the people around you. Lost in the little world the two of you shared. He looked down at your form, "Yes it was. I enjoyed it very much." because you're with me, he wanted to add but instead of saying those words, an amiable look in his cerulean eyes twinkled, and an adoring smile latched upon his features instead.

Almost as if he's telling you an unspoken confession.

His expression however, turned into mild surprise when he noticed how your gaze was filled with enchantment. With a soft glint in your lidded eyes, your brows are knitted together. You were silent.

It baffled him.

Why.

'Why are you looking at me like that?' Artem wanted to blurt out. His mouth opened to say something.

It was unclear to him as to why you looked like you were staring at his very soul.

'Why are you looking at me like,' he can't help but ask himself as he continued to scrutinize your tranced gaze, 'like you want to say the same words I desperately wanted to tell you?'

Are his feelings reciprocated?

You blinked and suddenly looked away, "Uhh, Artem, I-"

"Everyone! One more hour to go for the fireworks! Please look forward to it!" The both of you landed your eyes on the speaker, then on each other.

Artem cleared his throat, pulling the collar of his turtleneck, "You were saying?" he inquired, voice and features laced with curiosity.

You cleared your throat and pulled on your collar, mirroring him, "I..." you started as your eyes darted as if you were looking for excuses, then your orbs glinted with realization and faced Artem, "I just wanted to say that we should take pictures! This is a memorable night after all."

His eyes begin to scan the theme park and his gaze found a small photobooth just beside the merry-go-round.

"Good idea. We haven't had anything to commemorate today's fun." He brushed off your weird behavior earlier as you dragged him towards your destination.

There weren't too many people in the waiting line, there were multiple photobooths, plenty enough to not create a line of more than five costumers per booth.

As soon as it was your turn, you excitedly rummaged through the cute costumes the guests can wear in the photos.

"Look Artem," you snapped your fingers to get his attention, "This would look cute on you!" You squealed as you waved the headband with cat ears in front of his face.

This kind of trend has been circling around lately. No matter how much of a busy man Artem is, he still has seen some posts about this on the internet...

Catboy culture, wasn't it? He wondered.

"You should wear one, too." He suggested. He gingerly took the headband from you and after a few moments of hesitation, he finally gave in to the anticipation in your eyes.

Your eyes were practically sparkling taking in the sight of catboy Artem in the flesh.

"Oh my gosh." You breathed, gaping at him.

Artem blinked. "Is there something on my face?" He then turned to the mirror to check what's wrong, nothing seems to be out of the ordinary though.

"It's nothing!" You frantically waved your hand and gestured towards the camera, "Let's take a photo!" you grinned, wearing cat ears identical to Artem's.

You guys started the photoshoot with your hands making peace signs.

Ah, the classic.

The few shots after just consisted of you putting on different faces while Artem just wore different headbands each shot, with the same pose.

"You guys, please act cuter for the camera! " The photographer suddenly commented.

Isn't Y/N cute enough? Artem internally recoiled.

"Young man, put your arms around your date or something, or do a heart pose together! " Mr. Photographer added.

Artem looked back at you, his eyes meeting yours, both were wide with surprise.

He cleared his throat for what seemed like the nth time today and looked at you for approval, "Do you want to?" he asked as his hands formed half a heart.

Your cheeks lighted aflame as you raised your hand, forming half a heart to connect it with his, "I don't mind."

As your fingers touched, Artem cannot control the pink flushing his cheeks as he smiled at the camera.

The photographer continued to instruct the both of you with how you should pose. He deserves a raise for doing his job really well, Artem thinks.

After of what it seemed like endless snaps of sappy pictures, the two of you decided to print all of them.

"Now we have lots of souvenirs!" you scanned each one of the photos and Artem can't help but think how good you two look together.

He thanked the photographer for putting his all into the shoot, then you both headed for the exit.

"How was it, Artem?" You turned towards him with a profound smile.

You have lots of photos together now. He can already see himself wide awake at night, staring at your couple-like pictures.

It was more than okay.

"It was a fun experience. The cat ears aren't bad." He said as he recalled how astonished you looked when he wore the headband.

"We spent almost 20 minutes there..." You sighed as you looked at your watch.

Artem unconsciously checked his wrist watch as well, "There are 40 minutes left before the fireworks. Do you want to check out more rides before then?"

You surveyed the theme park to look for more booths, "Look at that, Artem." you pointed toward the large and loud crowd at the park's quadrangle.

"Perharps it's someone performing." Artem guessed, hearing the strums of a guitar from the speakers.

"Let's check it out!" Curious, you and Artem shuffled yourselves into the crowd. The faint singing voice grew more and more audible as you got closer to the center of the attraction.

You headed to the front for the best audience experience and the singer came into view, "Isn't that?" Artem's eyes were as wide as saucers when he recognized the person singing.

Funny how you weren't surprised, and he wondered why.

There at the center, sitting at a stool with a guitar in hand, singing with a gold microphone in front of him, was the new employee at the firm, William.

Artem frowned.

That's the guy. The guy who was getting too cozy with you, the guy causing the unpleasant pangs inside his chest.

The guy who was one of the reasons why he got the courage to ask you out on this date in the first place.

The feeling of delight earlier was now replaced by uneasiness.

"I didn't know he was a performer." Artem murmured, and he kept glancing at you.

When he saw that you were clapping your hands and a proud smile has decorated your lips - one that's not aimed him, a sudden bitter feeling overwhelmed his whole being.

You looked very happy, and he hung his head low.

He vividly remembered your smiling faces in the office yesterday, and how William seem to always hang around you.

Artem realized he wasn't special. The warm look that he witnessed from you earlier in the sunset, the look that made him think that you reciprocated his feelings, you probably do that to everyone.

He felt so stupid.

While everyone was watching William hit the notes and strum the strings, Artem was watching your every reactions, only for him to get hurt on the inside.

His heart hurts, the clenching feeling in his chest tightening with every cheer that you voiced.

He's glad it was you who were causing this pain, though.

The crowd boomed with claps and shouts as the last note finished the song, and Artem wasn't in the mood to join them.

6:30pm

"Aren't you going to greet him?" Artem's voice made you look up to him, his brows furrowed and he wasn't making eye contact.

You just brushed his behaviour off and said, "Nope. I wouldn't want to disturb him on this special day!" you felt giddy, knowing that you helped William to set this all up.

As soon as his first day in the office, which was around a month ago, he had overheard you and Kiki talking about the big opening of PAX's amusement park, and kept asking questions about the event. He then learned you were friends with the heir, Marius.

You've never seen a face as shocked as William's when he learned that.

He even made Kiki contact her insiders about the soon to be opened theme park.

Kiki asked why he was so curious, and he said he performs on gigs as a hobby, balancing it with his law career, and that he loves performing ever since he was a kid.

"Performing on the theme park's opening would definitely give me more opportunities!" He sounded so passionate that you can't help but support him.

He became bashful though, as he said, "Besides, I've been looking for an opportunity to surprise my girlfriend next month," you and Kiki beamed at him, "This would make her happy, as I made a new song that I specifically made as a gift for her birthday. I'll sing it on the opening if I'm allowed."

That's why ever since, you became close with William. Whenever you talk though, he almost always talk about her girlfriend.

"30 minutes remaining for the fireworks display!!!" The speakers announced.

You were excited for the fireworks, and an idea popped out of your mind.

"Artem," you called him out "Let's ride on the ferries wheel, that way we're up in the sky as the fireworks erupt," you dragged him to the ferris wheel's ticketing booth, "I heard that it takes 20-30 minutes for a capsule to be on top of the wheel, the time is perfect for us!"

"Can we be alone in the capsule?" Artem suddenly requested, his eyes filled with a look you can't fathom. He looked so vulnerable.

"Yes, that's actually normal. We can request that for the youngest senior attorney with 99% win rate!" You grinned and you expected him to send you one of his gentle smiles, but he just turned his head away, and looked at the distance.

You take a good look at him again once you got the tickets, he's still looking away, a solemn demeanor in his face.

You can't help but wonder what he's thinking. He's been acting a little weird, you thought.

Does he not want to hang out with you anymore?

"Artem, if you don't want to, you can tell me. I won't be mad." You eyed him with concern, "We can just sit on the bench or something." you suggested.

Just like that, his expression changed quickly, regret clouding his face, "Y/N," he sighed, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that with my actions," he stared at you for a few seconds, then you noticed that light was back in his eyes, the fond smile you liksd seeing is back again, "The ferris wheel is perfect." He then grabbed yoir waist and guided you both to the capsule.

You grinned, "I requested a capsule for only the two of us!" you waved the tickets at him, he chuckled and grabbed it from you to give to the person managing the capsules.

The capsule was air-condition inside, with big windows to get a good view of the outside. You expected nothing from a device created by PAX.

Across from you, Artem sits, his mood is a little better now, but you can't help but notice the silent sadness his cerulean eyes hold still.

You don't like seeing him like this.

"Hey, Artem?" you half-whispered, not wanting to surprise him from his reverie.

His eyes met yours, "Yes?" he responded gently.

"You know you can trust me with your problems, right?" You started, you don't let his surprised expression distract you from what you want to say, "I will listen intently to your troubles, and we'll find a way to solve them together! " You declared with the brightest smile you could ever muster, "So please, share your burdens with me. I'll carry them with you." You finished with a toothy grin.

He blinked a few times before finally shaking his head with fondness, "Thank you, Y/N. I want you to know that you are special to me." His face is suddenly filled with so much endearment you quickly looked away, "Uhh, Of course!" your face flushed red and you raised your hide in an attempt to hide it.

Artem chuckled, the sound giving you a sense of comfort and security. You looked up to him again and saw his features get illuminated by the lights flickering in the theme park, his adoring eyes lingering on you.

Like yours was lingering on him.

You smiled at each other, letting the other feel that they're not alone in the battles they're facing.

What are you to each other, anyway? You pondered when you decided to avert your eyes away from him first.

As far as you can recall, friends don't do this kind of thing with each other. The staring, the blushing. Oh, especially the blushing.

You can't help but long for the possibility of having your feelings reciprocated, but oh boy were you afraid.

"Can I sit beside you?" His question brought you to your senses, and you happily obliged, "Of course! This capsule isn't shaky, we'll be okay being on the same side." You made space for him as you patted the empty space. There he sat, his scent enveloping your senses.

It was silent for the whole ride up, but you were comfortable with it. You were with the person you love, being with them is enough.

7:00pm

Your capsule was right on top when suddenly, a boom was heard and splashes of color was seen through the window.

"Artem!" you pointed at the big, colorful patch of explosion that's a little bit below the capsule you were in.

The ferries wheel was so high that you were higher than the fireworks!

The fireworks was on your side of the window, you can see the view to it's fullest glory.

"Whoa!" you exclaimed, your eyes astonished by the scene before you. Your hands flat against the window, when you suddenly felt a body pressed against your back, and a hot breath against your ear, "It's amazing" you heard Artem mutter, as his breaths fanned the hairs on your neck, before resting his chin on your shoulder.

You yelped, you forgot Artem was just beside you!

Your heart pounded against your ribcage when you realized that in order for Artem to see the fireworks, he needs to look at your side of the window.

Heck, your thighs were touching, and you can feel every ounce of heat that his muscular body radiated. He's practically caging you and this small, suffocating space of a capsule isn't helping!

Despite the unbelievable heat that your whole body is feeling right now, you badly wanted him to wrap his arms around you.

Something was pooling in your stomach, something weird. All you can think about right now is Artem kissing you against the window while you sit on his lap.

Warmth filled your already heated cheeks upon realization of what you just imagined, and you mentally slapped yourself. What were you thinking?

The smell of his vanilla cologne isn't helping!

Nobody has ever made you feel this way before. No other person has affected you like this. You think about the things that this man had done for you, he was selfless, hardworking, and most of all, kind.

Especially the smiles he had always shown you. Those smiles filled with comfort and fondness that makes you weak in the knees. Whenever you see that smile, you find yourself looking forward in seeing it again.

To you, Artem Wing was unobtainable.

Yet you wanted to make him yours.

7:01pm

"Artem!" you pointed below with an enthusiastic grin as the fireworks boomed and splashed the sky above the theme park.

His body scooted over to you without realizing, eyes widening with glee and he muttered, "It's amazing" Artem leaned towards you, placing his chin on your shoulder for him to get better view of the fireworks display below.

It's taking every ounce of his control to not face you towards him and claim your lips then and there.

What you said earlier only fueled his raging feelings for you. You were willing to carry his burdens with him? He never had someone say that to him before, and he was happy it's from you.

The evening is flawless. The two of you were alone, having you near him like this, your decleration of support earlier, and a beautiful scenery before him that he won't get to see everyday...

A perfect evening to pour his heart out to you.

He decided that if there was a best time to confess his love for you, that time would be now. He didn't care about your answer right now, he just wanted to let it all out before this passionate feelings can drive him to insanity.

These feelings were driving him crazy, he wanted to let you know how you make him happy, that he thinks about you eveey second of every day, that you ground him and his lonely heart.

He noticed you were silent and unmoving, so he decided to take the chance. He took a deep breath.

"I'm in l-" "Can I ki-"

You turned your body to face him, surprised. Your face only a few centimeters away from his. One wrong move and you'll kiss.

The both of you blinked.

"You... go first." you said, biting your lip.

He stared deep into your eyes, none of you dared to move from this intimate position, your breaths fanning each other's faces.

"Y/N, I," he rested his forehead against yours and breathed with the most vulnerable voice you've ever heard from him, "I'm in love with you..."

You gaped, but he didn't mind.

He closed his eyes for a few seconds, "It's okay if you don't feel the same. I..." he opened his eyes to give you a loving gaze "I will keep loving you anyway."

He looked so vulnerable right now, but it didn't scare him. If anything, he feels relief in finally voicing out the feelings he's hidden for so long.

"I was in a bad mood today because I think you were interested in William," you just blinked and he continued, "I mean, you always look happy when you're with him. It crushed my heart." He finished as he waited for your response.

He waited, and waited.

The silence that you were giving him didn't give him any clue to what you were thinking, it's unnerving.

After of what seemed like an eternity you finally let out, "He has a girlfriend, silly." you see Artem's eyes widened and you continued, "It's a long story, but I'm not interested in him. We're just friends."

You felt the heat creep up his face.

"So... what were you going to tell me?" He said hesitantly as he gulped, the embarrasment from earlier evident in his voice.

Your cheeks flushed pink as you darted your eyes, it was now your turn to get really embarassed, "Can I..." your face looks conflicted. That if you say whatever you wanted to say, It'd be the death of you.

You took a deep breath, Artem told you his feelings, so it's only fair you tell him yours, you told yourself and mustered the courage to look up to his ocean eyes, a vast ocean so blue, you could drown in them, "Can I kiss you, Artem?"

It took a moment before he could fully process your words. His brain short-circuit.

"What?" He blurted out as he scanned your face for any signs that maybe, you have made a mistake.

but you replied, "I want to kiss you Artem," you put your hands on his shoulder to steady yourself, "I'm in love with you too."

His body tingled with so much joy, you being in love with him was just a distant dream before.

Not willing to wait anymore, he licked his lips as he slowly dipped his head to meet your already parted mouth, welcoming him.

You may or may not have kissed the entire way down the ride.

Artem Wing is a dedicated man.

Now, he's willing to dedicate himself to you for the rest of his life.

do not repost © lavynrose 08/16/21.

[petboymart]

will we get any bull!Asahi content? 👀

a/n: anon you will be exited to know that i WILL BE GIVING YOU BULL ASAHI CONTENT BC OMG THIS IS A BIG BRAIN IDEA COMING RIGHT UP BABES OH MY LAWD

shout out to nox and their big brain for BLESSING us on this fine middle of the night

-eden <3

bull!asahi x fem!bodied reader NSFW

tw/cw: breeding, fem!body gender neutral pronouns, slight dubcon, rut, mastrubating, belly bulge, slight size kink

you took a job as a farm hand, working for a farmer named ukai about a month ago. you basically just cleaned pins, fead all the farm animal boys and girls, and occasionally have them medication and baths when needed. the job was simple enough and the farm animals were quite nice to talk to.

today, the breeding bull of the farm was coming back. your not quite sure why he left and wherever you asked everyone got all hush hush, well except this little rooster boy who loved to call him a coward and a cry baby. everyone was buzzing with excitement, and it would be a lie to say you weren’t as well

you were given the task of cleaning his pin and getting it ready for his return. you had to admit, you were quite thrilled to meet him after hearing everyone talking about him for the last month. they said he was so big and strong, perfect genes for breeding heifers. they said he was real scary looking to, super intimidating.

while you were lost in your thoughts you didn’t hear the trailer pull up, or everyone welcoming the bull back before leaving him to retire to his stall, insisting that he get some rest after his long travels. you vaguely register the sound of footsteps but don’t really think anything of it. at least not until you turn around.

you drop your pitchfork in surprise at the bulls sudden appearance, eyes wide as you take in his gorgeous figure and long hair tied nestled into a bun at the back of his head. his own eyes are wide, the clatter of your pitchfork hitting the floor snaps you both out of your trances. as you open your mouth to apologize he beats you to it.

“ah i’m so sorry, i’m a quiet walker you probably couldn’t even hear my steps! here let me help clean!” he rushes out as he bends to pick up your fallen pitchfork. he quickly hands it to you before stuttering out another sentence, “i’m um i’m asahi, i just uh just got back today!”

you offer him a smile and reply, “i’m y/n, it’s nice to meet you asahi, everyone here talks so highly of you!”

his eyes widen at that and a red blush spreads across his cheeks. he opens and closes his mouth like a fish before stuttering out his reply of, “o-oh d-ahem-do they really?”

you can tell that he’s trying to act nonchalant about it, but you can tell by the blush on his cheeks that he’s very flattered at the news. he must value their opinions on him a lot, you think to yourself. your smile grows as you answer, “yep! they told me allll about how big and strong you are!”is it possible for his blush to deepen? because it does.

before he can reply, you speak again, “well, i’ll get out of your hair! you probably want to relax in your stall after being away for so long!” as you pass him you ruffle his hair between his horns, as you make you way down to the barn door you shout, “i’ll see you around asahi!” with a smile.

asahi thanks his lucky stars that you left when you did, because his aching hard cock was practically screaming for attention.

about a week later, your cleaning asahis stall with him in there. you offered to come back when he was outside but he told you he liked talking to you, so here you are. after about 30 minutes of cleaning his stall and making small talk, you decide to ask him the question that had been on your mind for quite some time.

“hey asahi,” you start, while turing to face him, “why were you gone for so long? even when y’all get really sick and need hospital care you’re never sent away for more than a week or two, so why were you gone for a month?”

his eyes widen for a split second, and the blush on his cheeks that he swore was from the heat darkens as his eyes dart from side to side over the stall floor. “well it’s it’s um,” he wracks his brain to try and figure out how to explain it, but can’t seem to find the right words, “it’s a-a little embarrassing,” he forces a laugh.

“oh! you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to! i was just curious is all,” your quick to reassure him, but he shakes his head.

“no no it’s ok, i want to tell you! it’s just a little hard to explain,” his voice gets a little more quiet towards the end.

you smile softly and reply, “that’s alright, take your time honey,” you turn back to continue cleaning but catch him squeezing his thighs together right as you finish your sentence, but simply shrug it off.

it’s about 10 minutes after that when asahi clears his throat, as if he wants your attention. so you turn to look at him and offer a sweet smile as a form a reassurance.

he gives a small smiles back before beginning to speak, “um so i uh was having some uh…issues with um m-mating with the um heifers, s-so the uh farmer sent me to this um thing where they uh, they uh ask you questions about um what would make m-mating more ap-pealing to you to uh try and encourage you to um do…it, but um” at this point his face and ears are cherry red, “it-it didn’t w-work for me. i don’t really um, find heifers appealing, not in that way at least.”

you give him a curious look and he panics, “not that i don’t think the heifers are beautiful, because i do! i’m just not attracted to them in that way, it’s not their fault!” you giggle at his little rant and he relaxes just a tad, “it’s not that um i don’t find anyone attractive in that way, i’m just not attracted to heifers, farmer ukai said that it’s okay though, that he won’t force me to mate with them if i don’t want to and i can still live hear until i’m old!” his tail swishes back and forth behind him as he speaks and he plays with his fingers.

“well, that’s not quite the answer that i was expecting but you don’t need to be nervous about it!” you state.

“i, i don’t? you don’t think it’s weird?” he asks with hopeful eyes.

“no honey, i don’t think it’s weird. and i’m happy that ukai is letting you stay because i quite enjoy your company,” you punctuate your sentence with a ruffle of his hair and a kiss on his head. “okay asahi, your stalls all clean, i’ll see you soon okay hun?”

“oh-okay!” he replies with a big smile. you toss a wink his way before gathering your supplies and leaving to clean the next pin. asahi releases a sign of relief before palming his hard cock while thinking of how pretty you would look under him while he mounts you and stuffs you full of his calves.

when you first started working here, the other workers and ukai all told you to try and avoid the bulls and heifers during their ruts and heats, unless you want them to jump your bones that is. quite a few of the other farm hands have assisted the cows and other farm animals before, but most times they just send another animal of their species in to help them. however, if there are no farm animals to help them one of the farmhands has to. ruts and heats are extremely painful if they aren’t dealt with, and there is no way in hell y’all are going to let these precious babies feel pain. normally their cycles are pretty close together, which is what makes this so odd.

asahis been acting weird all week. clinging to your side wherever you go sitting with you inside other bulls and heifers stalls while you clean them, trying to follow you into places he can’t go and pouting when you tell him no. and when you return he’s sitting on the ground playing with the grass waiting for you to come back. when you have him his weekly bath yesterday he was extremely tense. and he wouldn’t let you wash his inner thighs, insisting that he wanted to do it himself. which of course you have no problem with and respect his wishes, but it is odd considering that he loves when you bathe him. you didn’t raise your suspicions with anyone until after the bath incident, asking one of the other farmhands for advice. when you explained his behavior to your friend during lunch the next day she gave you an answer you weren’t expecting.

“huh, that sound like prc,” she said before taking a mouthful of food.

“what does prc stand for again?” you ask after sipping your water.

she swallows her food before explaining, “pre rut cycle, it’s phs for the girls because they have heats,not ruts,” she took a sip of her drink before continuing, “the week before their rut or heat they get really clingy to who they see as the best partner to help them through their cycle. they wanna touch you all the time, follow you everywhere, and get super possessive over you. i’m not surprised that asahis instincts have decided you’re the best fit considering that he doesn’t like heifers and you’re literally the only farmhand he’s around 24/7.”

you stare at her with wide eyes and try to process her words. “what do i do? do i help him?” you ask quickly.

she sips her drink again before stating, “well you shouldn’t help him if you’re not attracted to him in that way, one it’ll hurt and two bull boys and heifer and cow girls feed of of your emotions. so if you’re turned off they’ll get turned off and their orgasms won’t satisfy their heat. it’s pointless.” she says nonchalantly. “no pressure though, if you don’t help him i’m sure another farm hand will. it’s just more satisfying for them to have who their instincts tell them is the best partner.”

you’re silent for the rest of lunch, contemplating what to do. on one hand, you are attracted to him in that way. whenever you would see his sweaty back muscles flexing under the sun you would always leave with an ache in your abdomen. but on the other hand is this morally right? you would feel terrible if you took advantage of him in such a vulnerable state.

on your walk to his pin to check on him, you contemplate the pros and cons of this situation. lost in your thoughts until you reach the barn door where you hear deep whimpers and raspy whines, your eyes widen and you jog to his stall without thinking. you pull open the door to find asahi on his knees fisting his swollen and angry red cock.

his head shots up when he hears the stall door creak, eyes teary as his blurry vision takes a moment to register that its you. he whines and grabs your forearm with one hand, the other still furiously pumping his cock, and yanks you down onto his lap. you stumble down onto him, straddling his thighs, your center a few inches away from where he’s pleasuring himself. using the hand he tugged you down with, he weaves his fingers in your hair and yanks back so that your eyes meet his. as you lock eyes with him, you notice how blown asahis pupils are, irises almost completely gone. he’s panting wildly while he stares at you and in your daze you manage to pick up on how the wet clicking sounds he’s producing get faster and faster until he releases a deep, desperate growl and you feel his cum hit your thighs and abdomen.

asahis gaze drops to where his milky white cum is located on your body, eyes narrowing and a sound of distaste rumbling in his chest. next thing you know your on your elbows and knees and you can feel asahi ripping your clothes off your body. once you’re completely bare he stares at your pussy before inserting one finger. his finger is so much bigger than yours, he’s reaching your sweet spots without even trying. the stretch and pleasure his finger bring you forces a whine from your lips and you arch your back even more.

asahi lands a harsh smack on you ass and growls out a single warning of, “stay. still.” hearing the aggression in his tone stills your rocking hips and your eyes widen. he had never spoken to you this way. it’s always been sweet loving words and stuttered out sentences, his rut must be pulling his aggression out of him. but hey, you weren’t complaining. he flips you onto your back and positions his body between your spread legs, all while continuing to finger fuck you.

you’re stretched even more when he adds another finger and begins to scissor and twist them around. you don’t beg for more or for his cock. you saw how massive that thing was and you know you’re gonna need all the prep he’s willing to give you. that doesn’t stop you from moaning though, and asahi is basking it the soft and high pitched noises tumbling out of your lips. your noises spur him on and he begins moving his fingers even faster.

despite acting purely on autopilot, even asahis instincts know that he needs to prep you or it’ll hurt. and the last thing he wants to do is hurt you, at least not in a non pleasurable way. so even though his cock is throbbing with need to breed you, he continues adding fingers and stretching your hole until all four of his fingers are stretching you out, his thumb is rubbing circles on your clit, and you’ve already cum once.

asahi removes his fingers but continues to give gentle little strokes to the outside of your folds while he lines up his cock. he slowly begins to push in, rocking in inch by inch and working your walls open. he leaned over to pepper kisses on your head, neck, and shoulders to show his appreciation for you. he puts his lips next to your ear where he whispers praises of, “doing so good for me, so proud of you,” and, “taking me so well sweetheart, like you were made for me.”

he lets out a strangled growl mixed with a groan when he finally bottoms out, head thrown back in ecstasy, ears twitching and tail swinging back and forth. asahi looks down to where you two connect and he moans at the sight of the slight bulge in your stomach. he moves a big hand and pressed down on it, hard. you yelp out a sweet little cry thats music to his big floppy ears. keeping his hand pressed down, he slowly pulls out about halfway before pushing back in. thanks to his hand on your abdomen you can almost feel the veins running up and down his cock with every thrust.

soon, he’s picking up the pace and moving his hand from you abdomen to the back of your knees to fold you into a mating press. the added pleasures from the new position combined with the overstimulation from your first orgasm quickly builds your next high. asahi revels in how small you look under him, completely at his mercy, ready to take his babies.

a/n: bull!asahi is an ideal provider. he’s either a light sub or a soft dom most of the time, and he turns into a rough but still so so sweet dom during his rut. i see him as the kind of petboy who is still acting on instinct during his rut but his instincts tell him to make sure you’re enjoying it as much as he is and not to be too rough with you -eden <3

[leia505]

The Sunrise and Your Sins | Chapter 2 (NSFW)

!!!! Link to Chapter 1 !!!!

AAAHHH thank you to everyone who read my first chapter!!! I’m sorry for the super long delay on chapter 2, I’ve been recovering from a car accident so this fanfic kind of lost it’s priority bc I’ve been in pain lol. But I’m feeling better now so new chapters should be coming out faster! 

From this chapter forward, there will be explicit sexual content meant for audiences 18+ so minors please do not engage! or engage and just don’t tell me idk 

All links to car visuals and playlists and art and tags and all that jazz can be found in chapter 1 :) 

Word Count: 14k

New Tags: consensual sex, oral sex(giving and receiving), brat and dom, choking, breeding kink, face sitting 

‘You free this weekend?’ you read the text off of your phone. You groggily glance at the time, which read 3:33 AM. 

‘Depends.’ you respond back to Kuroo.  Two and a half weeks had passed since the last job he worked, meaning it had been two and half weeks since you had seen him and discussed your suspicions about your father. 

‘Friend of mine is throwing a party. Karasuno Killers are gonna be there.’ Kuroo replies. Your pulse quickens, remembering the conversation you and Kuroo had about your brother and his racing team. 

‘I’ll be there.’ you pause before hitting send, questioning if the action you were tempted to make was a good idea. ‘Are you free rn?’ you type, pressing send and locking your phone, setting it down next to you as you stared up at the ceiling. Your heart raced at even the thought of Kuroo, of the idea of being in his presence alone again.

Your phone lit up seconds later. ‘Be there in 15.’ You can feel yourself blushing, and you can’t stop the grin that spread across your face. 

You practically jump out of bed, changing into something casual. A flash of red catches your eye, and you grab Kuroo’s jacket, draping it over your shoulders. You sit back down in bed, impatiently waiting for Kuroo to text you. 

After what felt like an eternity, you finally got a text from him. ‘Here princess.’ You smirk at the use of the nickname, you were starting to get used to hearing him call you princess, and you couldn’t deny the fact that you liked it. 

Moving quietly through the house, you quickly peer over to your father’s office to see if the lights were on. Long work nights were common with him, the only downside being that the computer with access to the security cameras was in that office. Lucky for you, he seemed to be asleep upstairs, so that was one less thing to worry about. 

“Hey there.” Kuroo’s deep voice practically echoed through the quiet night, and you quickly shush him as you lock the front door. He laughs, holding the car door open for you. He shuts it behind you and goes around to his side, climbing in and starting the car. 

“So, where to?” He asks, turning to you, his elbow resting against the center console, a huge grin spread across his face. 

“Anywhere.” You say, anxious to get away from your house, away from your father. It gave you chills thinking about your brother and the connections that were beginning to form, with your father only a few feet away at times. You tried your hardest to act as normal as possible around him, but you knew that eventually he would catch on to your sudden change in behavior. 

“Are you hungry?” Kuroo asks, pulling out his phone and unlocking it. You take a peek at his lock screen, and see a photo of a black cat staring back at you. 

You shrug. “I could eat.” You say, causing Kuroo to chuckle. 

“I know the perfect place.” He says, calling someone. “Hey Haiba, you guys still open?” He pauses as the person named Haiba responds. “Perfect. I’ll be there in 20. Save a table for two.” He pauses yet again. “No you ass, not for Kenma. I’m bringing a girl.” He says, hanging up the phone. 

You laugh at the interaction between them, looking over at Kuroo as he pulls out of the driveway and through the neighborhood. Kuroo glances over at you, smirking when he realizes you were already looking. You quickly look away, staring ahead intensely. 

“You look cute in my jacket.” He says. 

“Does that mean I get to keep it?” You ask playfully, smiling sweetly at him. He laughs, a big grin on his face. 

“I’ll tell you what. You can keep it, but I will need to borrow it from time to time for races. Fair?” He says, holding a hand out for you to shake as he keeps the other on the wheel. 

“Sounds good to me.” You say, grabbing his hand and shaking it. Your fingers graze over the callouses and scars on his knuckles, and you turn his hand over to examine them. 

“Just some work related injuries.” He jokes, squeezing your hand.

“These are from working for my dad?” You ask, your voice quiet, almost out of shame. 

“Yeah.” He responds. You couldn’t hide the painful expression on your face and Kuroo quickly took notice of it. “Nothing to worry about though, princess. I’m tougher than I look, I promise.” He says, winking. Kuroo brings your hand to his lips, placing a soft kiss, making your heart skip a beat and your cheeks glow red. 

He lets go of your hand to switch gears as you enter the city. There are no shops that appear to be open and no one on the street. Kuroo slows down, pulling into a parking lot. 

“It doesn’t look like anything’s open.” You state as Kuroo gets out of the car. 

“Looks can be deceiving.” He says, shutting his car door. You let yourself out, closing the door behind you and turning towards him. He takes your hand and leads you to a small shop with a sign that reads “Haiba Ramen”. From the outside it had looked as though it was closed, but as soon as Kuroo swung the door open, you realized it was anything but.  

There were plenty of people in there, almost all of them wearing racing jackets of different colors, the style similar to Kuroo’s. The smell of ramen was strong and welcoming, your hunger growing as you entered the shop. 

“DK!” You hear someone call out. The patrons of the ramen shop all turn their heads to look at the both of you, and you were met by a chorus of greetings. 

“Someone’s popular.” You quietly comment to him as he leads you to a table away from the crowds. 

“Haiba’s part of Nekoma Crew, part time mechanic, part time ramen shop owner. He’s better at cooking than fixing cars though.” Kuroo motions towards the other patrons in the shop. “These are all racers. The store is closed to the public at 10, but stays open for friends and racers until 5. Me and the team usually have our meetings and get togethers here.” 

“Well who else would let you fuckers in this late at night?” A tall guy with silver hair says, placing two waters on the table. Kuroo gets up to greet him. 

“We’re eternally grateful Lev.” Kuroo jokes, giving Lev a half hug. Lev rolls his eyes as Kuroo sits back down.

“Hi.” You say shyly, giving a small wave to Lev, who smiled down at you. 

“You must be…(y/n).” Lev says holding a hand out for you to shake. 

You scrunch your eyebrows together, shaking his hand. “Uh, how do you know my name?” You ask skeptically, curious as to how he already knew you. 

“DK won’t stop talking about you at the shop. Sometimes it’s like he can’t shut up about you.” Lev smirks, looking over at Kuroo. You look at Kuroo with a face of fake shock, grinning from ear to ear. You see his ears growing red as he avoids your gaze. 

“Your tip is rapidly decreasing the longer this conversation goes on for.” Kuroo says, making you laugh. Lev scoffs, mockingly putting his hands up. 

“Alright, alright. I wouldn’t want to third wheel on your date any longer anyways. Now, what would you two love birds like to eat?” 

Kuroo sighs, putting his face in his hands in distress. The entire exchange made you laugh, getting to see Kuroo as a normal guy instead of a mob henchman was refreshing. Friends, not colleagues. Race cars, not drugs. Not to mention, it gives you butterflies thinking about the fact he talks about you to his crew. 

“Surprise me.” You say, catching Lev’s attention. “Make me whatever you think I’d like. Or whatever you feel like making. I promise I’ll eat anything.” Lev grins brightly, turning towards Kuroo. 

“I like her. Don’t screw this up!” Lev calls out to Kuroo as he walks away to the kitchen to start on whatever it was he would choose to serve you. 

“So you talk about me, huh?” You say, smirking at Kuroo. 

“Maybe.” He says, cheekily grinning at you. “You don’t talk about me to your friends?” 

“I...don’t have friends.” You say, shrugging. “In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t really leave the house much.” 

“You don’t have any friends?” Kuroo asks, a puzzled expression on his face. 

“Nope.” You say, taking a sip of your water. “I mean, I had friends in high school. But I sort of drifted away from them after graduation and after my brother died.” 

Kuroo nods, knowing that your brother’s death was a touchy topic. “Well, you have to have someone to talk to. Someone you consider a friend.” He says, diverting the conversation away from the dark and depressing stuff. 

You thought to yourself for a second, trying to think of a person you found yourself spending time with and talking to, or even someone that you enjoy being around. “You.” You answer, smiling at Kuroo. “You’re kinda the only person I ever talk to.” 

Kuroo smiles back at you, letting out a small chuckle. “I’m honored, princess.” Kuroo takes your hand in his, planting another gentle kiss on the top of your hand, making you blush. 

“Are you usually up this late?” You ask, getting curious about Kuroo and his life away from you and your family. 

He shrugs, rubbing small circles along your knuckles. “Some nights, if I have a job or if I’m working on something with Kenma. Tonight I just happened to get a text from a friend about the party this weekend, I thought it’d be a good way for you to get in contact with Karasuno.”

“Who’s party is it?” 

“A good friend of mine, Kotarou Bokuto. He’s the leader of Fukurodani Squad, his racing name is Blackjack.” Kuroo answers. 

“Is he…” You pause, wondering the best way to ask if Bokuto’s a criminal. 

“No.” Kuroo says before you can finish your sentence. “He’s just a racer. Him and his crew are pretty well known internationally, so all his income comes from his shop. He’s...just a really good guy. Not a bad bone in his body.” 

“Oh, so you do have normal friends.” You say sarcastically. 

“Well, Fukurodani and Karasuno are the normal teams. They don’t do the shady stuff. Seijoh Brawlers and Nekoma Crew are pretty similar, since only me and Oikawa do the jobs. Kenma gets involved every once and awhile, but it's rare. Inarizaki though, they’re literally all drug dealers. Drug dealers who happen to also be racers.” Kuroo explains. 

“That would explain why Kita doesn’t have a fancy jacket.” You say, remembering the plain black hoodie he wore the last time you saw him. “So it’s just you, Oikawa, and Kita doing the shady stuff?” 

“Yeah, mainly just us. I promise not all racers are big bad guys.” Kuroo jokes to you. 

“You’re not a bad guy.” You say, squeezing his hand gently. “You’re just...someone who works for a bad guy. Bad guy adjacent.” You smile at him, knowing that one of the things that held Kuroo back from pursuing anything with you was the fact he saw himself as the villain. The truth was, maybe the both of you were just bad guy adjacent — not necessarily the villains, but stuck being attached to the bad. 

Kuroo gives you a sad smile, squeezing your hand back. “I guess that’s better than being the evil genius.” You knew exactly who he was talking about, who the evil genius was in this morbid epic that is your life. The mastermind, the puppeteer, the dark hand behind the curtain. Your father. It was a hard pill to swallow, but it was one that you had to, which you and Kuroo both knew. An unspoken acknowledgement of the fact that sooner or later, you would have to face your demons — that regardless of what, or who, they are — Kuroo would be right there beside you. 

Your moment with Kuroo was interrupted by Lev, walking out of the kitchen carrying a plate and a bowl. “Bon appetit love birds.” He says, placing a bowl of ramen in front of Kuroo and a plate of chicken wings in front of you. 

“Thanks Lev. Put it on the shop’s tab.” Kuroo says, digging into his ramen. 

“Thanks Lev.” You say, smiling and picking up a chicken wing. It was still steaming, hot and fresh from the fryer. 

“I hope you two enjoy. DK, you gonna be at Blackjack’s party this Saturday?” Lev asks, turning towards Kuroo. 

“Yeah, we’ll be there. Do you know who the party’s for?” Kuroo asks, picking up a soft boiled egg from his ramen and eating it. 

Lev shrugs, throwing a kitchen towel over his shoulder. “No clue. That guy just throws parties for the hell of it. I’ll see you both there!” He says, walking back towards the kitchen. 

You take a bite of the chicken wing, and you instantly understand why Kuroo said he was a great cook. “Holy shit.” You say, looking over at Kuroo. 

Kuroo peers over at you with a mouth full of noodles. “I know.” He says, mouth stuffed to the brim. He finishes chewing and wipes his mouth with a napkin. “A guy on my crew named Yamamoto always gets them. Same with Bokuto.” 

“It seems like you know everyone in Tokyo.” You say, digging into your big plate of wings. Lev also left you a small bowl of rice as well as a cup of miso soup, which you also began digging into. 

Kuroo laughs, picking up more noodles from his bowl. “If they race, I know them.” 

“It also seems like everyone knows you.” You say, thinking back to when you first entered the shop, and all the greetings Kuroo was met with. 

“Well, everyone kinda does. Y’know a title like Drift King isn’t just given to anyone.” He says, smirking at you. You roll your eyes at his arrogance. 

“How lucky am I to be sharing a meal with the great Drift King.” You say jokingly. Kuroo places his chopsticks down, looking across the table at you. 

“Is this not a date?” He asks seriously, eyebrows furrowed. You practically choke on your chicken, which you place down on the table. After wiping your hands on a napkin, you look at Kuroo, who was still staring at you intensely. 

“Was it supposed to be?” You ask shyly, unsure if the miscommunication was on your end or his. 

“Well, I kind of assumed, you asked if I was free. Now we’re eating a meal together. You never really fight it when people talk to us like a couple.” Kuroo says, fidgeting with his spoon that laid in the broth of his ramen. 

You pause for a second, thinking over what he just said. You avert his gaze, staring into your miso soup which had begun to settle and separate. “Did you...want this to be a date?” You ask, looking up at him skeptically. 

“I definitely wouldn’t be opposed to it being a date.” He answers carefully, but with a tone of confidence. “But, if you don’t want it to be, that’s fine.” He says quickly, trying to avoid a bad mood shift between the two of you. 

You pondered again over what he said, and what it would mean for the two of you. Is a relationship the right thing to get into with everything going on? Would it even be appropriate for the two of you to be together? 

“This is a date.” You say, your heart pounding away anxiously as you look into Kuroo’s hypnotizing hazel eyes. He grins proudly at you, all feelings of anxiety going away as soon as you confirmed that this was, in fact, a date. “But, it is just a date. It doesn’t mean anything...specific.” 

He shrugs, picking his chopsticks up to continue eating. “That’s fair. No worries, princess. I’m in no rush here.” 

You smile to yourself, content with the conclusion that you and Kuroo came to. “Thanks. I just don’t think I’m ready for anything serious right now. With everything going on with my dad.” You say, knowing that this was something Kuroo already knew. 

“Yeah, I get it. Bigger fish to fry right now. It’s not like I’m going anywhere.” He says, winking at you. 

The two of you had continued to eat in silence, occupied with the delicious food in front of you. At one point, Kuroo had placed a small bundle of noodles into a spoon of broth, holding it out for you. 

“Aw, for me?” You say, leaning over to take the bite. The ramen was perfect, apparently everything Lev made was incredible. 

“What kind of guy doesn’t share his food with his beautiful date?” He says, making you smile. 

“I guess that means you deserve a chicken wing.” You say playfully, placing a wing in the empty bowl that once held your miso soup. “You should feel special, I really don’t share my food.” 

The two of you had finished your meals in silence, simply enjoying one another’s company. It feels as though this small outing was a break from the reality you both dread — rather than playing detective or operating within a gang, you were just a couple out on a date. 

“We better come back here one of these days.” You say, stacking your empty dishes up. You and Kuroo had finished everything, full and happy, now starting to get sleepy. The other racers in the shop had already left, and you could hear Lev cleaning in the kitchen. 

“Fine by me. As long as you still consider it a date.” Kuroo says, getting up from his seat and stretching. You get up as well, and Kuroo holds out a hand for you to take, which you do. Walking alongside him with his hand in yours, you grab onto his arm with your other hand, feeling especially affectionate towards him. 

“See you later Haiba!” Kuroo calls out as the two of you exit the shop, the cool night air breezing past your face, waking you up. 

You let go of Kuroo’s hand to open up your car door, and Kuroo walks around to his side and climbs in. As he turns on the car, the clock reads 5:05 AM. 

“It’s pretty late.” You comment, realizing how tired you had gotten. You lay your head against the car seat, turning your head to look at Kuroo. 

“Yeah, I know. Do you wanna go home now?” He asks, turning towards you to see your drooping eyelids. 

“Hmmm… not just yet. How about you drop me off when the sun comes up?” You ask sleepily. 

“Whatever you want princess.” Kuroo says quietly, starting the car. You rest your eyes as Kuroo begins driving off, feeling content as you drift off to the sound of Kuroo switching gears. You never thought that you’d ever be comfortable enough to fall asleep in someone’s car, given how paranoid your brother’s death had made you. But with Kuroo, you were just so at home, so trusting of him. You almost couldn’t believe that before your first job with Kuroo,  you just saw him as the hot guy who worked for your dad. 

Before you knew it, you were being gently awoken by Kuroo, the sun beginning to peak over the horizon. You didn’t recognize your surroundings, but you weren’t at all worried. There was never anything to worry about if Kuroo was with you. 

“Where are we?” You ask, looking around. It appeared as though Kuroo took you to a park, a bit away from the city. 

“We had some time to kill, I figured you’d want to see the sunrise.” He says, unbuckling his seat belt and turning to look out to the horizon. You do the same, sitting up in your seat and rubbing the sleep from your eyes. 

After a few moments, you recognize the park Kuroo took you to. “When I was younger, my mom would take me and my brother here.” You say, memories coming back to you. You thought it was strange, how everything seemed to be leading back to your brother lately. It almost felt like a sign. 

“I used to come here a lot too, with Kenma. Maybe we ran into each other once.” Kuroo says, leaning against the armrest. You gently lay your head against his shoulder, wrapping both of your arms around his. 

“What a coincidence that we ended up here.” You say softly, relishing the moment between the two of you. The sun’s rays were barely peeking over the horizon, giving the sky an orange glow. There was a decent amount of overcast, so it gave the sun a softness to it. It was as though the sky was still drowsy, unprepared to make its first appearance for the day. 

“No place I’d rather be.” Kuroo says, barely louder than a whisper. He tenderly places a kiss on the top of your head, staying there for a second longer than expected. 

You slowly move your head up to look at him, your faces closer than they have ever been before. At this distance, you could really study the features on his beautiful face, the dark bags under his eyes from one too many late nights, the small scar on his cheek that was most likely from a job gone wrong, his dark lashes that framed the striking hazel eyes that now stared directly into your own. 

You thought about all the other people that had stared into the same set of eyes you were now gazing into — all the women who knew him intimately, the friends who saw the good in him, the enemies who saw the evil, those whose last moments were spent looking down the barrel of a gun into these hazel eyes. To them, it probably felt like staring into the gates of hell, but for you, it felt like home. Kuroo felt like home. 

His lips slowly graze against yours, almost tentative, trying to read the situation as it happens in real time. A simple ask, a gentle whisper of a question against your lips, inquiring if this was okay. 

In a surge of confidence, your lips crash against his, urgency in your kiss, borderline desperation. Had you been pining for Kuroo all this time? More importantly, was he? 

His hand gently made its way up to your face, as yours snaked behind his neck, pulling him closer. His other hand moved underneath his jacket that you wore, wrapping around your waist. You felt the calluses on his fingertips, rough against the smooth skin of your lower back. 

The sun began beaming into the car, bringing the both of you into the light. It felt euphoric, being bathed in morning sun as you kissed Kuroo. Your heart raced in excitement as you felt Kuroo smile against your lips, and you gently sigh as he pulls away to look into your eyes. 

He grins at you, his eyes studying every detail of your face. You smile back at him, feeling pure bliss. 

“You kinda taste like chicken wings.” Kuroo says, chuckling softly. He gently runs his thumb against your cheek, admiring your face. 

You close your eyes, shaking your head at his stupid comment. You laugh, realizing that the goofiness, the silly jokes and banter that you and Kuroo share is the reason why there were never any doubts in your mind with him. Kuroo could make you laugh despite all the darkness in your life, and that is what made you feel the way you felt. Maybe it was love, but maybe it was too soon to tell. Maybe being the girl in the passenger seat was enough for you at this time. 

“Well you taste like ramen.” You say, your voice hoarse. 

“What a pair we make.” Kuroo says, placing one last tender kiss on your lips. 

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“Sweetheart, come here for a moment.” You hear your father call out to you from the hallway. You let yourself into his office, and find Kuroo sitting in the chair in front of his desk. 

“What’s going on?” You ask tentatively, sitting next to Kuroo. 

“Your dad has some questions. About us.” Kuroo says. 

“Us?” You question, looking at Kuroo. He wore a poker face perfectly, staring directly at your father with an unwavering gaze. 

“I know you two are getting close. And (y/n), sweetheart, you know I trust you. And Tetsurou, you have earned my trust over the years with your loyalty to this family. I just need to know what exactly is happening with you two.” Your father says. 

“We’re friends.” You say quickly, crossing your arms defensively. 

“Friends?” Kuroo asks, breaking his cool demeanor to look over at you. Your father raises an eyebrow, looking between you and Kuroo curiously as you try to figure out what this relationship is. 

“Maybe more than friends. Someday. Not right this moment. But a strong maybe.” You answer shortly, fumbling over your words. 

“I see.” Your father sees, nodding his head. “Are you two...being safe?” 

“Dad!” You say, embarrassed by this interrogation. 

“Yes, sir. Well, there hasn’t been anything that requires...safety, but when it does — IF! If it does, we will be safe. You have my word.” Kuroo says. You could hear his nerves getting the best of him, and you couldn’t help but find it entertaining how scared he sounds as he practically word vomits to your father. 

“Good.” Your father says shortly, awkwardly adjusting in his seat. “Now, for business...I don’t know if I’m okay with (y/n) being seen with you.” 

“What?” You ask, raising an eyebrow. 

“Our family is a moving target for a lot of people, especially the Nohebi Clan. I don’t know if it’s the best idea for the two of you to be going out in public.” 

“I understand, sir.” Kuroo says, in his eyes you could see his disappointment. 

“Dad, that’s ridiculous.” You say, getting fed up with the passivity of the conversation. “I’m going to be leading the Sakanoshita family one day. I’m a target no matter what. But no one will take me seriously when I do take over if I’m locked away all the time. People need to know me. They need to know who’s going to be the next King of Tokyo.” 

“But you just had your first job. You’re jumping into this too quickly.” Your father argues. 

“Keishin had years of training. I’m playing a game of catch up here, and I think the more experience I have, the better. I can’t run an empire from the confines of this house, dad.” Again, playing the dead brother card. It’s a tricky one to play, but it always works. 

Your father sighs, folding his hands in front of him. “You sure know how to argue.” 

“I learned from the best.” You say, smirking. 

“I’ll make a deal with you.” Your father turns toward Kuroo. “You’re getting a promotion. You’re now (y/n)’s bodyguard. She goes somewhere, you follow. If she wants to go somewhere that is potentially dangerous, don’t allow it. And you.” He turns back towards you once more. “You don’t go anywhere without him. You can go out, be social, earn your place here as a Sakanoshita. Let people learn who’s the next King of Tokyo.” 

You grin, knowing that you would be able to reach an agreement with your father. “Sounds like a deal. Kuroo and I will be going to a party this Saturday.” 

As you proudly saunter out of your father’s office, he calls out a question. “What party?” 

“Racer party. Gotta make sure everyone knows the new Sakanoshita boss.” You call out, walking out the door and down the hallway, leaving Kuroo and your father to their business meeting. 

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You could hear the party before you could see it, the music blasting so loud it could be heard from down the street. Even this far from the house, there were already cars parked along the side, all shiny and suped up like Kuroo’s. A lot of time had passed since your last real social outing, but you were at ease knowing Kuroo would be there with you. 

“Just a fair warning, Bokuto is...very loud.” Kuroo says, slowly driving past all the cars and making his way to the driveway of the house. The house was very modern, with a long driveway leading up to a white home with a balcony in the front, huge windows letting you peek in to see all the people inside. The music continued to grow louder and louder as you drew closer to the house, and the cars got nicer as well. Apparently only the people with fancy cars got the good parking spots. 

“How loud are we talking?” You ask Kuroo as he puts the car in park and turns the engine off. 

“Like...imagine the exact polar opposite of Kenma. Then make it louder. That’s Bokuto.” Kuroo explains as he gets out of the car. You do the same, walking over to his side and grabbing his hand. The two of you walk up the stairs to the door, and Kuroo swings it open without knocking. And just like that, you were officially at your first street racer party. 

“Hey, it’s DK!” You hear someone shout distantly, followed by a chorus of greetings. It was just like the ramen shop, everyone being so quick to greet Kuroo. 

“Hey everyone.” Kuroo says loudly, greeting everyone at once. He pulls your hand so you’re standing in front of him, leading the way into the party. Everyone gawks at you as Kuroo places a hand on your waist, coaxing you to walk further into the house. 

“Does everyone know you? Should I start getting used to that sort of greeting?” You ask, maneuvering your way through the crowd. 

Kuroo laughs, giving your belt loop a tug and pulling you into him, your back crashing into his strong chest. “Eventually people will start saying DK and (y/n).” He says into your ear, kissing you on the cheek. You smirk at his comment, a part of you enjoyed the attention everyone was giving you as Kuroo held you against his body. He really knew every way to feed into your ego, and you really did love it. 

“HEY HEY HEY! IS THAT MY BOY DK?!” you hear a loud, chaotic voice say from the kitchen. You and Kuroo turn your heads to find the source, and you see a tall, muscular guy with spiky grey hair grinning at the both of you. You notice the grey bomber jacket he wore, meaning that he was a racer like Kuroo and Oikawa. His appearance was a bit intimidating, and his features were almost...owl-like. 

“BOKUTO!” Kuroo yells, letting go of your hand to greet the host of the party. The two tall, well built men embrace in a hug, clapping each other on the back. You stand there, smiling at this new side of Kuroo. You understood what he meant by Bokuto making him feel more normal. 

“Good to see you dude! Hey, Lev mentioned you were bringing a girl! Where is she?!” Bokuto asks excitedly, looking around to try and spot you. 

“Right here.” You answer, moving to stand next to Kuroo. “I’m (y/n). And I’m assuming you’re the infamous Bokuto?” 

Bokuto laughs, throwing his head back. “Infamous, eh? That must mean DK’s been talking about me.” 

“I figured I should warn her on what she’d be walking into.” Kuroo says slyly, wrapping an arm around you. You found it endearing how affectionate Kuroo acts with you, making sure to keep you close. 

“Glad I didn’t scare ya away.” Bokuto jokes, grinning at you. “Well, DK here is like a brother to me, so by extension that makes you family. Both of you just make yourselves right at home, drink whatever you want and let me know if you need anything. Mi casa es su casa, as Cypher would say. Well, he probably wouldn’t say that, but it’s definitely Spanish.” 

You laugh, smiling up at Bokuto. Kuroo was right, he really is just a genuinely nice guy. Bokuto was a refreshing change from the usual dark and scary stuff  that you and Kuroo dealt with. 

“Say, speaking of Cypher, where is the punk?” Kuroo asks, looking around. 

“Upstairs with the rest of the Brawlers. Your guys are out back. Say, you guys want anything to drink?” Bokuto asks, turning to the counter full of liquor. 

“None for me. Gotta make sure someone gets home safe.” Kuroo says, squeezing your shoulder. 

“Well look at you being all chivalrous!” Bokuto says, playfully punching Kuroo’s arm. “Anything for you, (y/n)?”  

“Sure, I’ll drink whatever.” You say, unsure of what to ask for. High school parties were one thing, but what the hell are you supposed to drink at a street racer’s party? 

“One mystery drink coming right up.” Bokuto says, turning around. “Akaashi!” 

A handsome guy with short dark brown hair turns at the sound of his name. “Can you make a drink for (y/n) pretty please?” Bokuto asks, grinning at him. Akaashi nods, putting his cup down and picking up an empty one for you. He pours some random bottles of liquor and some more random juices into a cup, handing it to you. 

“Thanks.” You say, taking the cup. You take a sip, and to your surprise, it wasn’t disgusting. 

“Akaashi’s kinda the drink expert. And car expert. He’s kinda good at everything.” Bokuto says, noticing your look of amazement. Akaashi rolls his eyes behind him, but you notice his ears flushing red at Bokuto’s compliment. “I’m gonna go be a good host and do my host thing, but I’ll find you two later!” Bokuto turns away from the both of you, walking towards the crowd of people outside. 

“Oh and DK!” Bokuto calls out loudly, making plenty of people turn towards Kuroo. “I’m glad to see you’re finally off the market! No more bachelor’s life for you!” 

“Bachelor’s life?” You question, looking up at him skeptically. Prying eyes peered over at the two of you, no doubt trying to sneak a peek at the great DK and the girl that took him off the market.

“Don’t worry about it.” He answers, rubbing the back of his neck and avoiding eye contact. Of course he was a lady’s man before you, just look at him. But just how many girls were in your place before you got there? 

Kuroo takes your hand, leading you upstairs to where Cypher was. The two of you found him lounging on a couch with a bunch of other guys wearing jackets similar to his, talking and laughing with a bottle of expensive looking tequila in his hand. 

“Hola amigo.” Kuroo says in a mocking tone, sitting next to Cypher. You sit next to Kuroo, and he puts his arm around you possessively. 

“Hola lovers.” Oikawa slurs, lazily placing an arm around Kuroo. “Good to see you didn’t scare princesa away.” He says, nodding to you. 

“You’re (y/n).” You hear someone say from the opposite end of the couch. You turn your head to see a guy with tan skin and short spiky brown hair staring at you. 

“Uh, yeah.” You say, caught off guard by how many people already knew you. Seriously, how often did Kuroo talk about you? 

“Oh, sorry.” He says, appearing to snap himself out of deep thought. “Cypher was telling us about the last job and mentioned you. Just put two and two together. I’m Iwaizumi.” He says, getting up and extending a hand to you. You shake his hand, smiling at him. 

“That’s right, I was telling a story! Now, as I was saying…” Oikawa continues on, recounting the events of the job that you accompanied them on, silver tequila sloshing around in the glass bottle as Oikawa wildly gestures with his hands as the story progresses. 

“So Sly Fox had the cargo the entire time?” Iwaizumi asks, looking at us skeptically. 

“The entire time.” Kuroo says, nodding. “Speaking of the Sly Fox, where is he?” 

“Outside with your crew.” a scary looking guy with deep set eyes answers. His hair looked very unique, a bleach blonde buzz cut with two black stripes running around his head. 

“Thanks Mad Dog.” Kuroo says, getting up, dragging you with him. “Cypher, let’s go. Got some work talk to do with Sly Fox.” Oikawa clumsily gets up, taking the tequila with him. 

The three of you walk down the stairs and out the backdoor, where you immediately see a group of guys sitting around a fire pit, half of them wearing black, and the other half wearing Nekoma bombers. 

“Sly Fox!” Kuroo calls out, getting Kita’s attention. He looks up from his rolling tray, blunt in hand. “We got some business to talk about. You too, Snake Eyes.” He says, pointing at Kenma. 

Kita nods, looking over at his guys and motioning for them to leave the area. Kuroo does the same, and the Nekoma Crew minus Kenma leave. You, Oikawa, and Kuroo each take a seat around the fire. 

“What are we talking about?” Kenma asks, looking over at you and Kuroo. Kita continues to roll, and Oikawa slouches in his seat, taking sips from his bottle. 

“Yeah, what are we talking about fellas?!” Bokuto says with a grin on his face, walking up to the group of you and grabbing a seat. You couldn’t help but smile at his behavior, his charisma. 

“Work stuff, Bokuto.” Kuroo answers, giving Bokuto a warning look. 

“Oh! Got it! Say no more, plausible deniability and all that jazz. You guys let me know if you need me!” He says, getting up immediately and walking away with haste. The entire time the grin on his face never wavered, he didn’t seem the least bit offended by being kicked out of the conversation.

“Bokuto knows the stuff we do, but we keep him out of it. He’s...a bit soft for our line of work. And he knows if he hears anything, he could get in trouble. So, he stays away.” Kita explains, licking his rolling paper and sealing the blunt. 

“We got some new intel from the boss.” Kuroo says. Oikawa sits up, paying attention now that the real business talk had started. “We may know who gave the anonymous tip during the last job.” 

“Someone we know?” Kenma asks. 

Kuroo nods. “Suguru Daishou. Fangs. He’s the lead for the Nohebi Clan.” 

“Nohebi?” You ask. Everyone looks over at you. “They used to work for my dad.”

“What happened to them?” Kita asks, lighting his blunt and getting it started. 

“Daishou crossed my family, I guess he was trying to make a name for himself by taking on my dad. Didn’t end well.” You say, remembering overhearing your father’s work conversations with Fangs when you were in high school. 

“Which would explain the grudge he has, and why he tried to bust us.” Kenma says. 

“But how would he know about the move? There were no other cars on the road that night.” Oikawa points out, setting his bottle down. 

“That’s the million dollar question. We still don’t know how he knew, but we do know he has eyes on us. Which means you guys and your teams need to be careful, at least until the Daishou problem is sorted out. Sound good?” Kuroo asks, looking at Oikawa and Kita. They both nod, understanding the risk that the Nohebi Clan posed. 

“I’ll see what I can find out about Fangs and Nohebi.” Kenma says, which Kuroo nods to. 

“Thank you. The more we know, the better.” Kuroo glances at you, meeting your eyes. “Any of you guys know where Karasuno Killers are?” He asks, looking around the group. 

“Upstairs living room. You got business with them?” Oikawa asks, looking over at you. 

“Something like that.” Kuroo says, taking your hand and standing up. “We’ll catch you guys later.” 

“See ya.” You say, giving a half wave with your cup in your hand. You follow behind Kuroo, once again going through the house and up the stairs. You were keenly aware of the eyes that seemed to follow your every move, and you couldn’t help but notice that they were almost entirely female. What, was Kuroo such a hot commodity that you being with him tonight was a headline? 

“See that, you pulled the E brake too soon.” You hear someone say from the partially shut door. You and Kuroo had made it to the room that Oikawa said the Karasuno Killers were in. 

“You guys watch racing footage at parties?” Kuroo questions, slowly opening the door. Inside, there were three guys sitting on a couch in front of a TV that appeared to be playing a video of a street race. 

“Not everyone is blessed with your drifting skills, DK.” One of the guys say, getting up to greet him. He had a warm smile, dark brown eyes, and short brown hair. Him and Kuroo give each other one of those bro hugs, and afterwards he turns to look at you. 

“I don’t think we’ve met.” He says, extending his hand to you. “Daichi Sawamura. Mechanic for Karasuno Killers.” 

“(y/n) Sakanoshita.” You say, shaking his hand. He raises his eyebrows slightly at surprise, no doubt at the mention of your family name.

“Sakanoshita?” Another guy with a buzzcut and a gruff voice says from behind Daichi.

“As in the King of Tokyo Sakanoshita?!” The third guy says, his voice higher in pitch. He wore his brown hair spiked up, with a single blonde streak right in the middle.

“Please excuse these two dumbasses, they’re not the best socially.” Daichi smiles apologetically, moving to invite you and Kuroo to join them on the couch. Behind you, Kuroo shuts the door. 

“You said you’re a Sakanoshita?” The buzzcut one repeats, staring at you intensely. 

“Tanaka, chill.” Daichi warns, looking over at him. 

“Yeah Tanaka, you’re gonna scare her away.” The guy with the blonde streak jokes, punching Tanaka in the arm. 

“Oh shut it, Noya.” Tanaka says, shoving him back. “Sorry. My sister knew someone with that last name.” He says, looking over at you once more.

“You’re Saeko’s brother?” You ask him, getting his attention. He looks surprised, almost a little scared by his sister’s name being mentioned. 

“How do you know my sister?” He asks, his voice taking on a threatening tone. 

“Yeah, what’s your business with big sis?” Noya asks, eyes darting between you and Kuroo. 

“Take it easy, guys. We mean no harm, I swear it on my crew.” Kuroo says in a peaceful tone. Tanaka and Noya lighten up, but continue to stare at you skeptically. 

“Keishin Ukai was my brother.” You say, causing the three men from Karasuno to sit straight up, simply from the mention of his name. “I know he dated your sister, and I want to talk to her.” 

“No one talks to big sis. Especially not strangers.” Noya says, leaning back against the couch. 

“You’re Black Lungs’ sister?” Daichi asks, looking at you with curiosity. 

“Yeah. He raced under the name Ukai to get away from my family. And I know about the accident. I’m sorry Tanaka.” You say sincerely, looking at Tanaka. You didn’t know to what extent Saeko was injured, but you assumed that she had to have taken some amount of damage. 

Tanaka shrugs, looking away. “It’s all good. Why do you need to talk to my sister?” 

“I need to know the truth about my brother. About how he died. And I heard that your sister and my brother were pretty close, I just want to talk to her about him.” You say, nearly begging. 

Tanaka sat for a second, thinking of a response. “My sister...she doesn’t talk to many people nowadays. She hasn’t been the same since your brother passed. Black Lung was her soulmate, or whatever.” He says awkwardly, shifting in his seat. “I’m sorry, but I don’t want to put her through reliving that night just for your sake. I really am sorry, (y/n), about your brother. He was a cool dude.” 

You sigh, taking a long drink from your cup. You had a feeling it would go like this, but you couldn’t help feeling disappointed by the outcome. 

“We think we know the truth about his death.” Kuroo says, making everyone in the room look at him. “We know it wasn’t an accident.” You knew he was taking a risk saying this, telling these guys the suspicions you held. He was gamlbing with the only intel the two of you had. 

“What do you mean the truth? His death was a tragic accident and that’s that.” Daichi says in an assertive tone. 

“Daichi, it’s okay.” Tanaka says quietly, his eyes not moving from your own. “You two know the truth? Or just theories?” He questions you. 

“We...have theories. But I think that talking to your sister will help point us in the right direction. Or maybe even give us exactly what we need to prove our theories.” You say, trying your hardest to convince Tanaka. 

Tanaka sighs, looking at the TV, which remained paused on a frame of an orange Mitsubishi. “I don’t know.” 

“No one knows you.” Noya points out, getting your attention. “You don’t belong to any crew, I know you’re here with DK but you aren’t officially a part of Nekoma. Everyone knows your dad is a shady dude. And Saeko shouldn’t have to relive Black Lung’s death for a stranger.” 

“You’re right.” You say, knowing that everything he was saying was correct. You were a stranger, the idea of a dead street racer’s little sister suddenly coming out of hiding to ask a thousand questions about her brother’s death was far fetched, even for you. “You guys have no reason to trust me, or to let me talk to Saeko. But I’m desperate. I just — I need to know what happened to my brother. I’ll do anything.” 

“What do you think Saeko would want? What would she have (y/n) do to prove herself?” Kuroo asks. 

“I know exactly what she would want.” Tanaka says, sighing and sitting up. “A race. A memorial for Black Lung. We haven’t had one for a while, but the last time she had one, all the money raised from it went to...a memorial fund. For your brother.” 

“A memorial fund? For Keishin?” You question, uncertain why the son of a millionaire needed a memorial fund. 

“It goes to Saeko. Helps keep the shop open, and funds her research into what happened to your brother.” Daichi answers. 

“So I’m not the only one with theories.” You say, beginning to understand. “I’m assuming it goes to P.I.’s, buying access to private files, stuff like that?” 

“We can neither confirm nor deny that.” Noya says in a robotic tone, like it was a line he was taught to say. 

“If we do the memorial race, who’s racing?” Kuroo asks, changing the topic. 

“Me.” You answer immediately, making everyone look at you in shock. “A Black Lung memorial race, with his little sister making her racing debut. It could be big. Raise a lot of money. I know the type of power my family name has in this city.” 

“And it would prove to Saeko that you’re serious about meeting her.” Daichi points out. 

“Okay, how about this.” Tanaka says, shifting in his seat once more. “You and me, headline race. If we can get some more racers in on this, then great. If you win, you can meet Saeko. If you don’t, then oh well. At least she’ll get some more funds for her...side project.” 

“I can get some more racers in on this.” Kuroo says. 

“Perfect. We got a deal, you two?” Daichi asks, looking between you and Tanaka. You nod, sticking your hand out. 

“Deal.” Tanaka says, shaking your hand.

“Looks like we got a race to plan.” Daichi says, grinning at Kuroo. 

Kuroo smirks, getting up. “I’ll go start recruiting some more racers.” 

You follow Kuroo, getting up and heading for the door. “I’ll see you on the road, cue ball.” You say, smirking at Tanaka. You slowly head out, leaving the door cracked open. 

“HA! CUE BALL! Get it, cause you’re freakin bald!” Noya yells, cackling with laughter. You chuckle, their conservation fading out as you walk with Kuroo back downstairs. 

For about an hour or so, you and Kuroo went around the party, mingling with racers, recruiting them for the Black Lung memorial. You got at least enough people for three more races. So far, the lineup was you vs. Tanaka, Kuroo vs. Bokuto, Iwaizumi vs. Atsumu Miya from Inarizaki, and Oikawa vs. Kita. Kuroo pointed out that there would be a good turnout for the memorial given how many great racers were on the bracket, which made you both nervous and hopeful. 

“So, since when do you race?” Kuroo asks you, sitting down on the couch. 

“I’m pretty sure I can figure it out.” You say, sitting down next to him, draping your legs over his. “Gas pedal makes car go vroom vroom. Seems simple enough.” You joke to him, making him roll his eyes. 

“Sounds like someone needs a teacher.” He says, leaning closer to you. 

“Sounds like someone wants to teach me.” You say, closing the gap between the two of you, kissing him. 

A buzz from your pocket interrupts you, causing you to pull away from Kuroo and take your phone out. 

‘Call me now.’ the text read from your dad. Kuroo saw it over your shoulder, and immediately sat up. 

“Dad, is everything okay?” You ask, trying to drown out the sound of the party. 

“You need to get out of there, have Kuroo take you somewhere safe. Nohebi is looking for us.” Your dad says in a rushed tone. You hear some shuffling on his end, and your mother’s voice in the distance. 

“What? Nohebi knows I’m here?” You ask. Kuroo looks at you with concern, seemingly ready to get up and run at any moment. 

“Daishou has eyes everywhere. Don’t come home, your mother and I won’t be here. Tell Kuroo to protect you no matter what.” There’s a brief moment of silence between the two of you. “Your mom and I love you, sweetheart. We’ll see you soon.” Three beeps signal the end of the call. 

“We need to go. Nohebi’s coming.” You say, jumping up. Kuroo follows suit. 

“I’ll let the guys know.” Kuroo says, beginning to race towards the backyard where Inarizaki, Seijoh, and Nekoma were hanging out. 

You follow him out, trailing behind him as he approaches Cypher and Sly Fox. Before you can catch up to him, he’s already heading back towards you, taking your hand and dragging you through the house and out the front door. 

“Will everyone be okay?” You ask him, running to the car. You hop in, Kuroo doing the same and turning the car on. 

“Between Seijoh, Inarizaki, and Nekoma, they have Nohebi outnumbered three to one. They won’t try anything at a party this crowded. Daishou’s too smart to fight a losing battle.” Kuroo says, immediately racing away from the party, the houses of the neighborhood zooming past your line of sight. “The gangs aren’t the target anyways. We are.” 

As if on cue, you see in the rearview mirror three cars pull up to the party, and Daishou climbs out of one of them. He was vaguely familiar, you could barely recall seeing him in your father’s office, but you knew that he would recognize you and Kuroo in a heartbeat. 

“We got out just in time.” You say, looking over at Kuroo. 

“Barely. We’re not in the clear just yet princess, still need to get somewhere safe.” Kuroo says shortly, continuing to fly down the empty Tokyo streets. “We don’t know if Daishou had eyes on us as we left. And as soon as he realizes we aren’t there, they’re gonna be all over the city looking for us.” 

“So where do we go?” You ask him. 

Kuroo pauses, staring out at the freeway in front of the two of you. “My safehouse. It’s under a bogus name, in an old neighborhood. They won’t know to look there.” 

You nod, sighing and rubbing your eyes. You didn’t feel even the slightest bit tipsy from the drink you had earlier. How did the night go bad so quickly?

“Hey.” Kuroo says gently, reaching over to hold your hand. “Everything will be okay. As soon as we’re at the safehouse, we’ll be in the clear. And I’m sure your mom and dad are somewhere safe as well.” 

His reassurance goes a long way, easing your nerves and allowing you to relax a little. There was no use stressing yourself out while you’re stuck in the car, driving to an unknown destination. 

After about 50 minutes of silent driving, Kuroo finally pulls off of the freeway and enters an old, run down neighborhood. Everything was quiet, and the streetlights overhead were flickering in the darkness. 

“Home sweet home.” Kuroo says, pulling into an alley next to an apartment building. He turns the car off, going to the trunk. You get out as well, watching Kuroo as he drapes a large tarp over the car. A bright red luxury car would definitely stand out in a neighborhood like this. 

Kuroo takes your hand and leads you up the apartment complex stairs to a door labeled ‘A402’. With one of the many keys on his keychain, Kuroo unlocks the door, opening it for you. 

There wasn’t anything very special about the apartment, it seemed like the type of place a person would crash at for a night or two then leave. A small but functional kitchen, a modestly sized living area with a couch and a TV. As you continue further into the apartment, you see a quaint bathroom with a standing shower, and a bedroom barely big enough to fit a full sized bed. 

“There’s some pillows and stuff in the hall closet. And some extra clothes in the bedroom.” Kuroo says, setting his keys on the counter and pulling out his phone. As you reach for a light switch, Kuroo stops you. “Wait, don’t. We shouldn’t make it look like anyone’s home, just in case. At least until I hear back from Kenma.” 

Although his paranoia seemed a bit much for you, you knew that it was for a good reason. If the Nohebi Clan was enough of a threat to make your father go into hiding, no precaution was too extreme. 

“I’m gonna go change.” You call out to him, grabbing a spare shirt and pair of men’s boxers from the bedroom closet. You gently close the door, beginning to strip off your party outfit and changing into Kuroo’s clothes. 

After taking a moment to recollect your thoughts, you decide there was no use worrying about things that were out of your control. Your mother and father, the race that you volunteered for, even the party you just fled from. What was in your control, however, was the bed.

“I’ll put some sheets on the bed.” You shout out to Kuroo once more, grabbing the pillows and sheets from the closet. It felt almost hotel-like, the way everything was pristine and untouched. At least you knew this wasn’t the sort of place Kuroo took other girls. 

“Perfect.” You say, fluffing the pillows one last time, then stepping back to admire your work. 

“I heard back from Kenma.” Kuroo says, pushing the door open and entering the room. He flops onto the bed, ruining your perfect sheets and collapsing your freshly fluffed pillows. 

You sigh in annoyance, closing your eyes to keep your cool. “What did he say?” You ask, sitting next to Kuroo. 

“Everything’s all good. Daishou and his guys showed up, asked for us. Oikawa and Kita were waiting for them, so they barely even made it past the front door. Told them we left a while ago, and that they didn’t know where we went.” Kuroo rubs his forehead with his hands, pushing his hair back. In the dim light that radiated from the street lamps outside, you could see the exhaustion in his eyes. 

“No one got hurt? Are they still out looking for us?” You ask, your brain going a thousand miles an hour. 

“Everyone's fine.” Kuroo says gently, taking your hand. “From what Kenma knows, they gave up looking for us and now they’re trying to find your dad. I think they’re assuming I brought you to them.” 

You breathe another sigh of relief. The two of you were finally in the clear, finally safe, at least for tonight. “So we’re okay? At least for now?” 

“For now, yes. In the morning Kenma will let me know if we’re all clear to go back to your place. But for right now, we’re safe.” Kuroo says, turning over to face you, wrapping his arms around your waist, resting his head on your thigh. 

“We’re safe.” You whisper to yourself, running your fingers through Kuroo’s unruly black hair. The moment of calm being shared between the two of you is disrupted by a loud rumbling from your stomach. 

“You hungry?” Kuroo asks, grinning against your leg. 

“Maybe.” You say, realizing how hungry you’ve been all night. Is eating at parties still not cool, or was that only a high school thing? You didn’t see anyone else eating at Bokuto’s, so you assume it still wasn’t. Or maybe you were too worried about everyone staring at you to notice if anyone was eating. 

“I’ll go grab some stuff at the convenience store.” Kuroo says, getting up and grabbing his jacket. “Onigiri?” 

“And some ramen please.” You request politely, smiling sweetly at him. “Be careful.” 

“Always am, princess.” He says, leaning down to plant a kiss on your lips. 

Kuroo exits the room and you hear the front door shut and lock. You found yourself in a silent, dark apartment, alone. 

‘Might as well see if the TV works.’ you think to yourself, getting up and walking to the living room and plopping down on the couch. Just like the bed, it felt brand new, as if you were the first person to sit on it. 

After flicking the TV on, you mindlessly scroll through channels, trying to find something to occupy your mind. It felt wrong, how everything was so dangerous and scary tonight, but all that you could think of was that one thing Bokuto said. ‘No more bachelor’s life for you!’ What does that even mean? 

Grabbing your phone, you realize that you really had no one to talk to. Normal girls would text their best friend, or even just a regular friend when they want to talk about boy problems. Normal girls, with normal friends and safe lives. Maybe Kuroo really is the only person you talk to. 

You scroll through your recent messages, trying to find anyone to talk to. Dad — no. For obvious reasons. Mom — maybe on a regular day, but not right now. Kuroo — big no, for even more obvious reasons. Dentist — yeah, if you were really that desperate. 

“I guess I could talk to myself.” You mutter out loud. After a moment of lonesome silence, you sigh. “Yeah, no. I’m not that crazy.” 

What kind of bachelor’s life was Kuroo living before you came along, before that early morning watching the sunrise? You always assumed he was the no strings attached sort of guy, considering the type of work he does. But then again, the only times you ever saw him was when he was working. Maybe the Kuroo you knew was just one side, the professional side. Of course he let his guard down around you, joking and flirting when you were alone. It had been that way for as long as you could remember, since Kuroo started working for your dad. But maybe that was just another side, the side for girls he was interested in. Maybe you weren’t the only one who got to see that side. You saw two out of however many sides he has — the flirt and the henchman. Maybe you didn’t know him at all. 

The sound of the front door creaking open draws you out of your thoughts, and you look up to see Kuroo with a convenience store bag filled with food. 

“I wasn’t sure which onigiri you’d want, so I got one of each.” He says, plopping a bag filled with various onigiris onto the living room table. “And I got two ramens, spicy and regular. I’ll take whichever one you don’t want.” 

“Spicy please.” You say, chuckling at how much food Kuroo got for just the two of you. Kuroo shrugs his jacket off, leaving it on the couch. Grabbing the bag with the ramen, he walks into the kitchen, flicking the lights on. 

“One spicy ramen coming right up.” He says, pulling a pot out of the cupboard. You grab a salmon onigiri from the bag in front of you, unwrapping it and taking a bite. 

“How often do you use this place?” You ask, watching Kuroo as he fills the pot with water and puts it on the stove. 

“Once in a blue moon, really. If a job goes wrong and I need a place to lay low, I stay here. Or if I need a place to crash and don’t feel like driving home.” He answers. 

“Where do you live, anyways?” 

“Close by the Nekoma shop, same building as Kenma. We talked about being roommates for a while, but we agreed we’d probably start hating one another.” Kuroo chuckles to himself, walking back to the living room to grab an onigiri for himself. 

“So it’s just you?” You ask, trying to steer the conversation in your favor. 

“Me and Yoruichi.”

“Yoruichi?” You ask, feeling like you knew the name from somewhere. Maybe an old anime?

“My cat.” He says, grinning. “I found her on a job, actually. She kept following me around and just jumped into my car when I wasn’t looking.” 

“Sounds like a pretty good life.” You say, trying your hardest to be subtle. “A bachelor’s life.” Okay, not so subtle. 

“I knew you were still thinking about that.” Kuroo says, laughing. “You know you can just ask me stuff. No need to try and jump over hurdles trying to talk to me.” 

“I’m not really good at this.” You admit. “You know...talking. Being open. Relationship stuff.” 

“Relationship, huh?” Kuroo asks, turning to you and smirking. The pot of water behind him was at a rolling boil, letting steam into the kitchen. 

You roll your eyes, your cheeks were definitely blushing but you hope that Kuroo couldn’t see it in the dim light. “Whatever this is.” You say quietly, knowing that a real label was the last thing either of you were thinking of with all the things you both were dealing with. 

“Like I said, ask me anything.” Kuroo says, his back turned to you as he stirred the ramen. 

“What did Bokuto mean by ‘a bachelor’s life’?” You ask, getting up to join Kuroo in the kitchen. You lean against the counter opposite the stove, staring at Kuroo’s muscular back. 

“I was...definitely a bachelor. For a while.” Kuroo says, back still turned to you. 

“Like...you had…” you say, trailing off. You were torn between saying “hoes” or “bitches”.

“I had...some girls that I spent time with. Nothing serious, though. I always made sure to keep things casual.” The conversation felt tense, slowly but surely growing more and more awkward as more details were being revealed. 

“I don’t really care about how many there were.” You say quickly, reassuring Kuroo and clearing some of the tension. “I don’t care who they are either. But is there anyone I should be worried about? It felt like everyone was staring at me at the party.” The memory of all the girls at the party staring at you curiously was persisting in your mind. 

“No one to worry about, really. None of them seem like the type to backstab, especially considering soon everyone will know you’re a Sakanoshita.” Kuroo says slyly, referring to the upcoming race in memory of your brother. You knew that as soon as everyone learned of your family, your sense of anonymity in Kuroo’s world would be gone. 

“I have one more question.” You say, moving to stand next to the stove, nearly in front of Kuroo. “If those girls were nothing, and you usually keep things casual, what are we?” 

Kuroo pauses, thinking for a moment before setting down his chopsticks and turning the heat to a simmer. Turning to you, he places his hands on either side of the counter next to you, trapping you underneath him. Your heart raced as you felt your breath catch in your throat, caught off guard by Kuroo’s sudden closeness to you. 

“I’m whatever you want me to be.” He says, barely louder than a whisper, his lips hovering over yours. 

“You’re mine.” You say, your gaze bouncing from his eyes to his lips. Kuroo moves closer to you, his body pressing against yours. 

“I’m yours.” He responds, wrapping one of his arms around your waist. 

“Kuroo…” You whisper, lips grazing his. He reaches next to you, turning the stove off. In an instant, his lips crash against yours. You wrap your arms around his neck, desperate for more — more contact, more kisses, more Kuroo. The entire night Kuroo kept you close to him, never leaving your side at the party, always making sure to let his kisses linger a few seconds longer than normal. All the pent up tension was finally being released, the adrenaline rush that came with all the drama from tonight only fueled the boldness of yours and Kuroo’s actions. 

You grind your hips against him, making him groan. You were very aware of two things; his growing member, hard against your body, and the sudden wetness between your legs. 

You gently push against Kuroo, freeing yourself from underneath him. His lips stay attached to yours, refusing to break the seal the two of you made. In one swift motion, you release from his grasp, and without looking back, you calmly walk to the bedroom, leaving Kuroo standing in the kitchen alone, pining for more. 

“Are you coming or not? Make sure you turn off the stove.” You call behind you, toying with Kuroo. You grin to yourself, knowing that you were just as irresistible to him as he was to you.

You open the bedroom door, behind you Kuroo’s footsteps grew closer and closer. Suddenly, you feel his arms around your waist again, and in an instant Kuroo is in front of you grabbing you by the throat, moving you so your back is against the door, pushing you backwards to shut it. 

“Such a pretty princess.” Kuroo says, closing the gap between you two. You felt your heart rate quickening, being trapped under Kuroo’s touch like this. A light moan escapes your lips, this dominant side of Kuroo makes you want him even more. His hand wrapped around your throat, his hard cock against your leg, the whole room felt electrified. 

“Kuroo please.” You whisper, eager for more. 

“You want me?” Kuroo asks, his lips barely touching yours. He wraps his other arm around you, grabbing your ass and pulling you against his body. The only thing that stopped the two of you from being directly pressed against one another was his hand around your throat. 

“Yes.” You answer breathlessly, moving your head forward, your lips colliding with his. Kuroo breathes heavily, removing his hand from your throat and moving to grab your ass. Almost by instinct, you give a light jump, wrapping your legs around Kuroo’s waist, his hands supporting you and keeping you from falling. 

Kuroo moves backwards until his legs hit the bed, then he slowly sits and reclines backwards, careful not to drop you or break the kiss. He maintains a firm grip on your ass as you straddle him grinding your hips against his, yearning for more friction between the bulge being held back by his jeans and your throbbing pussy. 

His fingers gently graze at the bottom of your shirt, tugging it upwards. You take the hint, sitting up and removing your top effortlessly. Kuroo does the same, sitting up slightly and lifting his shirt over his head. In the dim glow of the street light from outside, you could just barely make out the dragon tattoo on that stretched from his neck down his arm. 

“Take these off.” Kuroo says, rubbing your thighs.

“What’s the magic word?” You tease. 

“Now.” He says, reaching for your neck, forcefully pulling you down to look him in the eyes. You smirk, relishing in the fact you were able to see this side of Kuroo. There was no fear within you as he tightened his grip around your throat, only more and more arousal at the sight of the great Drift King grasping for control. 

Gently, you take hold of his wrist, making him let go of your neck. After placing a small kiss on his thumb, you get up, unbuttoning your pants. Kuroo’s eyes never left you, he was hypnotized, his hand rubbing his hardened crotch. He almost looked as if he was stuck in a trance, watching you undress before him, as if you were something out of a magazine that had come to life right before his eyes. 

Reaching behind you, you unclip your bra, letting it fall to the floor, your nipples already rock hard. Kuroo lets out a small “fuck”, watching you in amazement. You turn to look at him, feeling no need to cover your nude body, no need to hide from him. You want him to see you, it turns you on watching him touch himself as he stares at you with lust in his eyes. At this moment, you wanted nothing more than to climb into that bed with him and fuck all night long. 

You take a few steps closer to him, bending down and reaching for his pants, smirking as you hear his breath catch in his throat. Kuroo moves his hands away, hoisting himself up on his elbows to watch you. After unbuttoning and unzipping his pants, he moves slightly to allow you to remove his pants — and to his surprise — his underwear as well. 

If there was a god out there, you were certain that they personally blessed Tetsurou Kuroo with a gorgeous penis. Standing perfectly erect in front of you, you stop for a moment to simply take it all in. The size, the girth, the slight lean to the left, the vein popping out in excitement, the droplets of precum gathering on the head. At just the mere sight of his cock, you felt a fire light inside of you, eager to pleasure him.  

“You just gonna sit and stare all night?” Kuroo asks sarcastically, looking down at you with a smirk. Without saying a word, you gently lick the precum off of the head, your eyes not leaving his. He gently sighs, his smirk falling as his mouth stays slightly agape. You will yourself to salivate, and in one seemingly effortless motion, you take his entire length in your mouth, the tip hitting the back of your throat. You gag slightly, trying your hardest to relax your throat to keep his dick in your mouth. Kuroo’s head falls back in pleasure, and a beautiful moan escapes his lips. 

“Goddamn, princess.” Kuroo says, lazily picking his head up to look you in your eyes. Once again maintaining eye contact, you slowly withdraw his dick from your mouth, allowing your drool to dribble from your mouth onto his penis. Kuroo’s chest continued to rise and fall heavily, watching your every move. Licking one long stripe along the vein of his penis, you once again take him in your mouth, this time creating a rhythm, your head bobbing up and down as your hand strokes the length that you couldn’t fit, letting your spit lubricate his cock. 

You begin to lose yourself in the moment, allowing yourself to close your eyes and bask in the sound of Kuroo’s soft groans as you pleasure him. 

“Come here.” Kuroo says, breaking your concentration. You slowly take his length out of your mouth, leaving it wet with your saliva. Kuroo reaches for your thighs, pulling you upwards to look you straight into your eyes as you hover over him, his wet length hitting your inner thigh.

“Sit on my face.” Kuroo commands roughly, hands wandering up and down your legs and ass, his fingers gently brushing the lips of your vagina. You shiver at the small contact made, ready for more. After planting a short kiss on Kuroo’s lips, you let him guide you until your pussy is just barely hovering over his lips, his hands securely gripping your thighs, your bare tits practically glowing in the dim light streaming in from the empty street. You felt so defenseless, exposing yourself as Kuroo stared up at your naked body, you both knew he was strong enough to hold you down against his mouth if he wanted to. 

Slowly, tentatively, you lower yourself down, your heart pounding out of your chest in excitement. Without missing a beat, Kuroo’s large hands tighten their grip on your thighs, holding you steady as his tongue furiously licks your pussy, practically making you double over in ecstasy. 

Your moans and whimpers of pleasure echo through the room, and Kuroo takes this as a signal to quicken his pace, his tongue licking fast strokes against your clit and dipping slightly into your hole. His pace continued getting faster and faster, tongue alternating between circling your clit and deeply thrusting into your hole. You were certain he was leaving bruises on your thighs, trying to keep you still against his devilish mouth. Gripping tightly onto his hair, you feel yourself beginning to come undone on top of him, your walls tightening as you grind your hips against Kuroo’s face, his nose nudging against your clit, the pace never slowing down. You weren’t 100% sure he could breathe, but you didn’t really care. All that mattered to you was reaching your climax with Kuroo’s face buried in your pussy. 

“Kuroo!” You moan out, pulling his hair a little harder as you feel your walls pounding as you hit your peak, struggling screams escaping your mouth as Kuroo continues gently lapping at your clit as you cum. It took everything in you just to stay upright, the intensity of Kuroo’s mouth never letting up even as you came. You ride out your high on Kuroo’s face, slowly releasing your grip on his head as he takes his hands off your thighs. 

As you continue to try to catch your breath, you lift yourself up, giving Kuroo room to breathe. He breathes deeply as well, looking up at you with a smirk. 

“You sound cute when you scream my name.” He says smugly, rubbing your thigh. You roll your eyes, your cheeks burning. Shifting backwards, you widen your stance to straddle his waist again, the tip of his penis just barely grazing the lips of your drenched pussy. 

“And I like you better when you’re quiet.” You say, just barely louder than a whisper. Your face was once again centimeters away from his, and his lips were still glistening with your cum. Without hesitation Kuroo’s lips meet yours, sloppy, wet kisses being swapped between the two of you as your hand takes hold of his dick, lining it up with your entrance. 

You watch as Kuroo pulls away from the kiss, his face contorting in satisfaction as you sink into him. You sigh, closing your eyes as his length slowly starts filling you up. There was only a little resistance, your walls having to stretch to adjust to his size. But even so, he felt so comfortable inside of you. It felt as if the two of you were made for one another. 

You feel your eyes roll back as you shift your hips, his dick twitching slightly inside of you. Kuroo’s hands gripped onto your ass deeply, urging you to move, to create some sort of friction. With the support of his hands, you move your hips upwards, then downwards, up, down, up, down, two bodies moving almost perfectly in sync as the room filled with the sounds of Kuroo’s moans and your screams. 

The two of you kept a rhythmic pace to maintain the high you were both building, his hands guiding your hips as you steadily let your body rise and fall against his. Fireworks exploded at your core every time your hips collided with his, the head of his dick ramming against your cervix. 

After some time you slow down, your legs were getting more and more tired as you rocked against him. Kuroo senses your exhaustion and effortlessly flips you over onto your back, getting on top of you. Lining up his rock hard cock at your entrance, he looks down at you with a malicious grin. 

“So desperate for my dick, huh princess?” Kuroo teases, letting the head of his penis rub along your soaking wet pussy, your walls clenching every time it barely grazes your clit.  

“Just get inside me already.” You demand, your body aching for more. You were so close to reaching your second high, and you were more than ready to keep going all night if Kuroo wanted to. 

“What’s the magic word?” Kuroo says, using your words from earlier against you. He slowly lowers himself until his lips graze your hardened nipple. The tip of his dick continues to rub against you, making your pussy throb. Kuroo flicks your nipple with his tongue, before taking it between his teeth and nibbling softly, causing you to yelp at the sudden contact. Kuroo moves away from your nipple, sucking hard on the soft tissue of your breasts, leaving hickeys scattered across your chest. 

“Please fuck me Kuroo!” You beg, unable to take any more stimulation. You feel Kuroo chuckle against your skin, right before he finally lets his tip enter you. He pushes into you at a painstakingly slow rate, making you groan in anticipation, shutting your eyes tightly. Kuroo always left you yearning for more, lusting for his touch. 

Kuroo moves his head upwards, nestling his face into your neck as he gradually increases his pace. He leaves small kisses along your neck, taking your ear lobe between his teeth and tugging on it, making your eyes roll back as you let out a loud moan. You shift underneath him, bucking your hips upwards as you wrap your legs around his waist. Kuroo groans into your neck, letting his head rest against your shoulder as he continues to pound into you, leaving shockwaves running through your body with every thrust. 

“Kuroo, please make me cum.” You moan out, tangling your hands in his hair. Kuroo quickly pushes himself upward, hoisting your legs up and using his thighs to keep your hips suspended in the air, his dick still deep in you. Kuroo smirks as he sees your eyes roll back in pleasure, your hands grasping at the sheets around you, your breasts bouncing with every thrust. His smirk only grows wider as he begins rubbing small circles on your clit with his thumb, causing you to scream so loud you were certain everyone in the neighborhood could hear you. 

With this added stimulation, you felt yourself getting closer to your climax much faster, the pressure building up in your pussy as Kuroo continues fucking you from this new angle. Without any warning, you feel your walls clenching like a vice around Kuroo’s dick, causing Kuroo to take his thumb off of your clit so his hands could grab your waist, keeping you still as you cum all over him. 

Your climax is only further intensified by Kuroo continuing to pound into your tight cunt, aching for his own release. The feeling of your vaginal walls spasming around his cock was more than enough for him, but getting to see you scream in pleasure as he sends you over the edge is what really did it for him. To him, there was no better sight than seeing his princess cum. 

It didn’t take long until Kuroo let out a throaty groan, his grip on your hips tightening as he fucks you even harder. 

“Cum inside of me.” You barely make out, your body overrun with satisfaction. Kuroo leans down once more, pinning your hands over your head as you wrap your legs around him. Looking deeply into his eyes, you watch as his face contorts in ecstasy, his forehead dropping against yours. You feel his cock twitch inside of you, and you feel your cunt fill up with Kuroo’s hot cum. 

After a last few sloppy thrusts, Kuroo pulls out of you, leaving you lying on the bed breathless, your chest rising and falling as you try to gain your composure. Your pussy was practically bursting with liquids, both yours and his. Kuroo briskly walks over to the bathroom, and you hear some shuffling and the sink running. Kuroo returns with a wet washcloth, kneeling in front of your soaking wet vagina and tenderly wiping up any cum that was on you. 

“Such a gentleman.” You comment, looking down at Kuroo as he concentrates on cleaning you up. He looks up at you, smiling when he realizes you were watching him. 

“Only the best for my girl.” He says, getting up and wiping his dick off with the rag. You move to lay on your side, feeling more than content with the events that just occurred. Kuroo lays next to you, looking into your eyes. 

“My girl?” You repeat back at him, squinting your eyes skeptically. Kuroo rolls his eyes, throwing his arm around your waist and pulling you next to him.

“I’m yours. You’re mine. That’s the deal.” He says, winking at you. 

“Since when am I yours?” You ask teasingly, knowing damn well that there was no arguing that you and Kuroo belonged to one another. 

“Since you screamed my name so loud the entire neighborhood heard you.” Kuroo says, smirking. “The hickeys speak for themselves too. They’re like a personal tag.” 

“Shut up.” You say, rolling your eyes at his lewd comments. You couldn’t hide the smile on your face as you thought about the idea of being Kuroo’s. “I’m yours.” You whisper, inching your face closer to Kuroo’s.

“You’re mine.” Kuroo responds back, placing a loving kiss on your lips. There wasn’t any lust, any heat in this kiss, which was a drastic change from the absolutely filthy deeds the two of you were just committing. It was a simple kiss, sealing the deal the two of you made. 

“Round two after dinner?” Kuroo asks jokingly, pulling away from your kiss. You laugh, resting your forehead against his, lazily nodding at the proposal of more sex. 

Alone with Kuroo in that tiny little safehouse, you felt more at home than you had felt in years. Maybe it was the intensity of everything that happened that night, maybe it was the sense of belonging you felt as you laid in Kuroo’s arms, maybe it was the way your heart fluttered every time you heard Kuroo say “I’m yours”. Perhaps it was all of it, all of these emotions and sensations coming together, a light in the middle of the darkest storm that raged on around you, right outside the walls of this apartment. That storm wasn’t going to stop, and you and Kuroo were fully aware of the dangers that lurked around the corner for the both of you. But maybe the comfort the two of you found in one another was more than just a shelter from the impending storm. A solemn promise that regardless of the future that lay ahead, there was one constant that would remain true — he is yours, and you are his. 

[the-nysh]

Abt Saitama being late not on him... I think it may actually is? From a technical standpoint, Saitama being the ideal hero who would actually do his job to a T, there pretty much wouldn't be a plot/conflict, bc eliminating every monster/villain is def within his power. However, there wouldn't be a point of opm to exist. Saitama being a flawed hero personality-wise is a driving point to me

While I do agree it's diverging waaaay too much from classic opm, I do kinda like it in a sense it changes things up. From my standpoint, WC Saitama's character development moves by a centimeter, if it moves at all. I think ONE genuinely just plans him to be sort of a narrative "rock" where the plot and characters growth happens around him but not him necessarily. But here, Saitama gets to confront what he should confront: that in a sense, King is right. That perhaps he should find another goal, bc he does have some aspects he needs to work upon. His OG goal is already "finished". That, what gives Saitama fulfillment isn't just the fights or heroism, but by his relationships with other people (that he admittedly, treats rather lacklusterly at best and callously at worst).

I don't think Saitama even realized the depth of how attached he got to Genos until he already lost him. He admits early on in the series that he always arrives late, but I think since everything seems to work out fine in the end, he got complacent. But now somebody else paid for the complacency, and the world's situation had reached such a low point (that unless ONE got some bullshit satisfying plot or a deus ex machina) it's the moment of no return. The "formula" stopped, in a sense

Usually, I have a great faith in ONE as a writer. But even I have to admit that there are some areas he didn't execute well (kinda hard to describe but yeah he doesn't always 100% hit the mark). But uh, this sort of plotline, that while exciting to me, doesn't feel like ONE's work? I don't think the webcomic has updated in like months, and he doesn't have new works that I know of, so I don't know what the state of his writing currently. Perhaps he's trying something new?

Ah, thank you anon, you bring up many nice points. :') It's just that 'being late' feels to me like it isn't always a factor someone can control, but there ARE other factors Saitama can work on that are under his control...as those 'other goals' King talked about: his behaviors and relationships with others, etc. The things he's been lacking but yet hasn't realized...or rather, as you say, the depth of how important Genos was to his life until...yeah.

About this new route not feeling like ONE's work...well, in the latest wc chapters (spoilers) Kuseno has been the most recent victim to an unceremoniously sudden death...which is super cruel to Genos in another way, but now this manga development makes me really worried for wc Genos....who's on his last body, and where wc Saitama, as you say, hasn't 'moved' comparatively much at all. If ONE's gotten newly trigger happy lately on his characters, then welp;;; I feel even more possible foreboding in store for wc Genos. ;o; (ONE pls don't...) esp if he intends to use him again to incite Saitama to move.

[willowbleedsonpaper]

Ron was right

Theo Nott x Reader

W.C. : 3043

Requestd by @herstory-study​:  Ok I kid you not(t) another idea just popped into my head.. I hope you like it... the gist of it is Theo and the reader have that relationship where they are best friends but also dating but nobody can tell bc they’ve always been super close so I imagine like a bunch of pple (including the twins) have placed bets on whether or not they are dating and I just imagine one day they come back from a date and pple in the background are either groaning/cheering cause they got $ u can take it from there

A/N: I hope you like it, Puff! Feedbak and reblogs are very aprecciated. Happy reading.

*Not my GIF. Credit to the creator.*

It had been a quiet day the first time Theo noticed you. Grey clouds move fast in the evening sky, the light breeze comfortable for every student out in the courtyard to show their house pride and wear their scarves around their necks. His friends talked about the Golden trio and what had they done that week to ruin their mood. Nothing new really. Theo never added much to those conversations, what was the point of complaining about something when you could ignore it. He too was bothered by Potter and his friends adventures and misadventures, but Draco and his friends weren’t the target. But that was just the way Theo saw it.

“Wait until I write my father,” grumbled Draco, sitting in the middle of the bench where Theo had been sitting with Blaise. “ Potter is going to regret it.” he said with a huff.

Pansy arrived just a second after he ended rambling, rolling his eyes as she sat on the grass without a care about her robes. She gave a pleading look at the other boys as she cocked her head towards the Slytherin prince. When neither one of them said anything she scoffed glaring daggers at both before she smirked “Draco darling, Why don’t you tell Blaise and Theo here what Potter did. I’m sure they’d love to hear it.”

Blaise’s protest died down on his tongue when Theo shut his book close “No need.” he said, looking straight in Pansy’s eyes “We saw it all.” 

And it was true, it was hard to miss one of their disputes when they shouted at each other, standing at opposite extremes of the hall as the crowd gathered to witness the latest drama between Slytherin and Gryffindor.

“Doesn’t matter if they know.” Draco said desperately, leaning to rest his arms on his knees “I already have a plan for them to know their place. And plan B in case that one doesn’t work.”

“Maybe you should try plan D for dumbass.” 

They all turned around to the large tree, their gazes lowering to the base of it. There you sat, an annoyed look on your face as you straightened your robes and stood. Your movements were sharp, taking your bag on your shoulder as you stormed away from them, all of them in a state of shock to even try to stop you. 

 “Who does she think she is.” muttered Draco, already jumping to his feet when Theo placed a hand on his chest.

“Leave this one to me.” he said lowly, his eyes never leaving your form as you walked away. Draco hesitated but gave him a slow nod as he sat back down. 

Theo smiled triumphantly, hiding his face quickly so no one would see him and his true feelings. He took off and ran after you, keeping enough distance so you would walk away from the eyes of his friends. 

He kept running, your back facing him as he came to a halt. “Hey!” he yelled, your eyes glancing back at him as you picked up your pace. “Wait, stop.” he yelled again, catching up with you as he stopped in front of you. 

“What?” you said sharply, looking down at his hunched form as he breathed heavily. You raised an eyebrow at him, crossing your arms over just your chest as you leaned back. “ Don’t tell me, Draco sent you to do his dirty work?”

“You…” he smiled, trying to keep in a laugh as he shook his head “You just called him a dumbass.”

You frowned, taking in the boy in front of you. Well kept brown hair, milky skin and the most beautiful eyes you had ever seen, his smile reaching his eyes as he stood to his full height. 

“Aren’t you his friend or something?” you asked confused.

He shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked around. “Even I can get annoyed at him.” 

You squinted your eyes, eyeing the boy before you looked up at him “Who are you?”   

He extended his hand with a smile, one you hesitantly took “Theodore Nott, but everyone calls me Theo.”

You raised both your eyebrows, shaking his hand with a nod “Right.” you said “Well, if you’re not here to avenge your friend…”

“I’m not.” he smiled as you mirrored his look.

“Maybe you’re not a dumbass.” you told him, staring into each other's eyes before you realized you had been in silence for too long “I’m going now.” you turned on your heel, resuming your walk to a more quiet zone where Slytherins weren’t complaining when his voice made you stop.

“You didn’t tell me your name!” 

You turned to see him with a smile, a glint in your eyes as you said “Goodbye, Theo.” He stared at you as you disappeared in the halls of the castle, breathing out a laugh as he returned to his friends.  

It was difficult to not think about you after that. Your two minute interaction had him wondering more about you, who you were, what did you like. He started to pay more attention to you after that. 

He thought getting your name wouldn’t have been a difficult task. He felt like the detective he read about when he was younger, sneaking in the middle of the night to behind his father’s back to read the muggle novel he got his hands on not a while ago, reading until his eyelids could barely stay open with only the moonlight to accompany him. He wanted to feel the rush of Sherlock Holmes, and he wanted you to be John Watson. But as he actually tried to get something about you without interacting with you he realized why everyone praised Holmes so much, it wasn’t an easy job.

You always seemed to be with someone, but in utter silence. Muttering a few words with the people around you as you always had something better to do. You were the mystery he couldn’t get out of his head, the thought that kept him up at night, the dream that had him drifting away as his friends talked. He wanted the honor of being your friend.

****************************************

You worked on your herbology research, a pile of dusty books at your left side as you read the one opened before you. Your study partner was someone gathering more information, probably found someone and got stuck in the chat. Nothing new, really. You were used to initiating the study date with your partner and ending it alone. 

You felt someone walking behind your back. Expecting to hear your partner’s voice, your head snapped up at the sound of someone else.

“So,” said Theo Nott, taking the chair next to yours with a proud smile on his face “How are you, Y/N?”

You dropped your quill on the table, tilting your head with a curious look “Who told you my name?” you asked.

“It’s written on your parchment.” he pointed towards your handwriting on the upper part of the paper. “I got to say, it was difficult. Not many people really know you, you're like a ghost in the castle.”

“Maybe to the people you asked, I am very well known here.” you said daringly, and he nodded. “Well you know my name, you can leave now.” You took your quill back up, following the line you were previously reading with your finger when the thudding sound against the table made you raise your head slowly with a glare. “What are you doing?”

“Homework.” he said simply, opening a book as he silently began to read. Not once looking back to you, not saying another until he finished. Taking his things inside and wishing you goodnight, leaving the library without another word. 

It became a routine after you realized he wouldn’t give up. He would always show up, sitting on the chair he did that first night and working on his homework. There were times when you would get there and he was already sitting, books scattered all over the table until he saw you, moving his things to make some space for you. He didn’t bother you, so you allowed it. His presence  warm and welcoming as you studied, you even helped each other sometimes.

A year had passed by since that night, and you didn’t realize when you started to think about him as a friend. The only person you actually felt comfortable calling  a friend. He had been there for your happy days, your rough days. He took genuine interest in you. Telling you about him and his life, sharing his candy and food as you walked through the castle side by side. He asked you about your life before Hogwarts, how was your childhood with a muggle parent. You told him all about your past school, how you lost your friends through the years as you never got to see them and you couldn’t explain your sudden change of school and life. Theo became your best friend and you couldn’t be more happy. 

“What are you doing this weekend?” he asked you.

“I don’t know.” you shrugged, putting a raspberry in his hand as you ate one “Sleep sounds good.” you said with a smile and he laughed.

“Are you sleeping for two days straight?” he said in disbelief, and you scoffed hitting his face with another raspberry.

“Is that a challenge?” you dared, sticking you tongue out to him.

He scrunched his nose, catching the berries in his mouth until you stopped “Stop, your Gryffindor is showing.” he said with a fake look of disgust. You only laughed, shaking your head as you drifted back to his question.

“I’m not doing anything, then.” you commented, waiting to see what he had to say.

“Do you want to go to Hogsmeade?” he asked simply, your heart beating fast in your chest in both nervousness and excitement. But once you saw  the carefree look in his face your heart dropped. Why were you feeling that way?

“I don’t know.” you said, trying to put the hurricane of emotions inside you at ease “I’ve never seen the fun in going.”

“That’s because you’ve never been there with me.” he said with a smile, tilting his head with a sigh at the hesitance in your face “C’mon, Y/N. You’ve told me you have never been with your friends…”

“They’re not really my friends.” you corrected with your lips pursed “They hardly are the people I hang out with. They’re just there in a silent agreement of company.”

“Am I not your friend?” he asked and you knew you had already lost the small debate.

“You know you’re my best friend.” you said with a small smile, one he returned as he held your hand, a warm tickle in your hand where his skin touched yours. 

“Then it’s settled. I’ll go get you from your common room.” he said and you nodded, praying that the emotion flowing inside you was slipping in the look of your face.

Little did you know that Theo was feeling exactly the same. His stomach was doing flips inside of him as you smiled at him. He wanted so bad to tell you it was a date, that he had just asked you out on a date but you had just said it, that word that left a bitter taste in his mouth. 

You’re my best friend.

Maybe he had been in the beginning, but not anymore. Or maybe he was, but he didn’t want to be your best friend. 

Many had noticed how the Slytherin and the Y/H/H had grown closer over the past year. Theories of what was the core of their relationship were made. How did Theo Nott get close to you? Did you have a deal no one knew about. Where you friends, partners, lovers. No one knew, and neither did you. 

The weekend arrives and just as promised Theo walked you from your common room to Hogsmeade, hand in hand as you talked through the snowy streets full of students. 

You were oblivious to the crowded mess, talking inside a bubble no one could bother you. Not even the redhead pair that stared at you as you walked past them. 

"Are you seeing what my eyes are seeing, George?" 

"We wouldn't be twins if I wasn't, Freddie." 

*******************************

"MAKE YOUR BETS, MATES!" yelled George from the top of the table in the middle of the Gryffindor common room. 

"Our lovely Y/N."

“Friends"

"Or lovers."

"With none other than Theodore Nott." 

They said, finishing each other's sentences with the invisible link the pair shared, that invisible string that made them shout the exact same words at the end. They wore grins on their faces as more bets were placed. 

"What do you think, little brother?" asked George jumping form the table 

"Friends or lovers?" 

Ron rolled his eyes, turning to Harry who was already making his bet with a smile in his face. Ron scoffed "I don't care about snakes business. They can be whatever they want." he said bitterly. 

"Someone jealous?" taunted Fred as Ron turned with a red face to his brother. 

He angrily pulled some coins from his pocket, slamming them in Fred's hands as he muttered "Lovers." 

*******************************

You had the time of your life at Hogsmeade. Theo was right and you told him so when the sun started to set, a few stars shining on the sky as you walked back to the castle. He smiled, hugging you closely with genuine joy in his face as he promised to take you again on the next trip there. 

However the next day, the murmurs and eyes from everyone in your year followed you everywhere you went. 

You were never shy, but the constant attention had you on edge the entire day. Finding refuge in the far table of the library, hidden in between the shelves where the only source of light was if you had a candle with you. 

You stayed there until late, waiting until the library was practically dead, you doubted madame Pince was still there, but you could never know. You had made it to the end of the day. 

"What are you doing here?" Theo's shushed voice came from behind you, his eyebrows scrunched together as he sat next to you, closer than he usually did. 

"I'm hiding." you whispered. 

For a moment his stomach dropped at the thought that you might have been hiding from him, that he might have let something slip on your day together and you knew how he felt. But you started ranting about your day and the looks you received from everyone and he understood, he had gotten the same looks all day long. 

"Don't worry." he murmured, opening his arms for you and you leaned on his side. "Draco probably said something about you again. I'll talk to him later" he sighed and you chuckled. 

He looked down to you, a loving look in his eyes as you kept chuckling. How could someone be so breathtaking just by doing such mundane things like leaning against someone and talking? Since the first time he saw you he knew you were beautiful but, Merlin, now you were gorgeous. 

"He is never forgetting about that, is he?" you laughed. Staring at the table, you frowned when Theo didn't say anything. 

You turned your head up to him, finding him already looking back at you. You didn't realize when you had leaned so close to him, his breathing blowing softly against your face as you gazed into his eyes. The little flick in them waking up all the butterflies in your stomach as you could have sworn his eyes moved to your lips for a fraction of second. 

You froze, realizing what that could mean when you felt him lean closer to you, his eyes closing before someone cleared their throat behind you, making you jump apart from one another. 

"The library is about to close." said professor Snape, looking at you with a glare before he settled his eyes on Theo. "Take your friend with you Mr. Nott. Directly to your common rooms." he said painfully slow.

You both nodded, clumsily taking all your stuff as you walked around him and practically ran out of there. No one said anything, your eyes on the floor as he walked you to your common room. 

"I'm sorry." he said once at the door handing you your books, your hands brushing against one another, making the blush in your face deeper. 

"No, I… You don't have to apologize." you stuttered before the words left your mouth. 

Heavy silence settled again between both of you, the tension making your stomach turn as you wished your feet would move and get you out of there. Of course, they had other plans. 

Theo wished you goodnight in a mumble, turning around and walking away just as you dropped your books on the floor, calling his name. 

"Yeah?" he asked, never meeting your eyes. You felt your mouth go dry, your hold in his wrist loosening as you breathed heavily. You brought your hand up to his cheek, smiling as he leaned in. He had closed his eyes and you ran your thumb across his cheek bone, waiting until he looked back at you. You started to lean in, his eyes widening as he realized what you were doing. His smile widened, cupping your cheeks as he closed the space between the two of you in a soft kiss. His hands wandered to your waist, pulling you closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his neck. He slowly pulled away, resting his forehead against yours with a smile that reached his eyes. 

"Remember when I told you I wanted you to be my Watson?" he breathed out with a smile "Well, I'm not so sure anymore."

You chuckled, moving to kiss his cheek as you rested your head on his shoulder "Funny, I always thought Sherlock Holmes and John Watson were lovers." you whispered in his ear. He smiled at you, kissing you once more. 

Completely unaware of the audience not so far away, hiding behind a wall with wide grins. "Ron was right." 

TAGS: @fanficflaneuse​ @nebulablakemurphy​ @lupins-sweater​ @accio-rogers​ @gloriousrebelrunaway​ @slytherinprincess03​ @not-today-anxiety​ @strawberriesonsummer​ @infinity1o1​ @haphazardhufflepuff​​ @deafgirltingz​

[lovelypersona]

I love your fics!....Please could you do a small fic/ with a pregnant s/o with Goro ,Ryuji and Akira ? Like how each of them would treat their s/o when their s/o is pregnant.

A/N: laughs . Reader is GN!

Goro and Pregnant!S/O

Like father like son. Deadbeat dad. Disappears after a week once he said he was gonna get milk from the store

I’m only mildly joking

No, goro would not abandon you or his baby. But he would be the most scared out of the three to receive the news

Please don’t get pregnant until many many years after the main plot where Goro has had the chance to receive therapy

Goro would need a lot of time to get used to the idea of him being a father in the near-future. So, no, he wouldn’t disappear and leave you, but the first few months where you can still do most things on your own and you don’t need to rely on him as much- he’s sort of flighty. Wouldn’t be unusual for him to take off during the weekend, but he’d at least tell you where he’s going and text you when he’s coming back

Just needs a lot of coping and alone time. And then eventually he’ll kick himself in the balls or ask someone to kick him in the balls since he can’t really do it himself

And then he’ll step up and be there for you.

Once he’s ready, he’ll be studying a lot. Reading all the pregnancy books he can and looking at things like the diet you should have and the amount of exercise you should be doing each day and week

If you really want to be a parent with him, and you want to do all of this with him, be prepared for him to be stern and unrelenting. He’s already 80% sure the baby will be mentally fucked up thanks to him so he at least wants the baby to be 100% physically healthy to prepare for that

Of course he can’t actually control the outcome of the birth and how the baby will be. But he likes to think he can

A very protective dad as well. When you’re in labor he definitely doesn’t like the amount of pain you’re in and he’s kind of like “WHY ARE THEY SCREAMING SO MUCH”

Goro you are also screaming. Calm down

But also seeing you in so much pain and all the blood and just all of it during your labor is very uncomfortable for him. He might have to leave the room a few times to catch his breath, but then he’ll come back in and back to your side, holding your hand just as hard as you’re holding his.

I’d talk more on this topic but I have to write for the others so I’m done now

Akira and Pregnant!S/O

When he finds out you’re pregnant, it’s definitely a shocker, but he doesn’t really express it visibly. Kinda just goes still, eventually says “oh. Alright. What do you need?”

Not even sure if he wants to be a dad and if he’s ready, but he’s willing to help you if you need him!

Bad. Smack him. Bad response

Like Akechi, but not at all to a similar extent, he’ll need time to process the information and mull it over. Not because he’s afraid, but because Akira has to assess what he wants

Akira is a people pleaser, a man with many masks. He’s lost sight of himself more than once because at times he’s not even sure who he really is

His wobbling grasp on his own self makes him uncomfortable and doubtful about his ability to be a parent. He’s not sure if he’s the best parental figure for a child

Despite that, though, he loves you, and he wants to help you. He’ll help you throughout the entire pregnancy and either move in with you/have you move in with him.

Your relationship is a bit strained because of the fact that Akira has no idea what he wants, but the two of you make it work and decide not to talk about it for now and just focus on the task at hand. The pregnancy

It’s during the pregnancy that Akira loosens up and slowly gets more comfortable. As your belly grows and the baby starts kicking, it kind of makes him realize twice-over that you really are carrying a kid that’s half-you and half-him

Huh. Funny how that works

Falls asleep with his head on your belly a lot. Hearing the baby is kind of soothing to him

He also tries to participate in your routines and diets as much as he can. But when you’re not looking or he’s out of the house, he’ll drink as much coffee as he possibly can. It’s the one thing he’s lied to you about. He told you he quit coffee for you but it was a lie a bold face LIE

Once the baby is born, that’s the last straw. After being through the terrifying event that is your labor, and hearing the baby cry for the first time, he’s like “oh. That’s my kid. That’s my kid”

Protective dad instincts all of the sudden and doesn’t like the doctors holding his kid at all

He’ll be a fine parent. Akira just doubts himself a lot, but being with you, you’ll help him and you’ll raise your child together.

Proposes to you like 6 months after your baby is born

Ryuji and Pregnant!S/O

You both absolutely got pregnant during your last year of high school wdym lol

Irresponsible SHIT of course he becomes a dad at the ripe age of 19

You tell him about your pregnancy right away, and when you do, he’s definitely in shock as much as you are

Freaks out a lot and yells very loudly and has a meltdown because he’s not at all ready to be a dad and you’re right there with him

Both of you seriously consider giving the baby up or something like that. But eventually you’ll agree to raising the child together

Probably puts a halt on Ryuji’s running career, but that’s fine. You and his new family is much more important to him than his love for athletics

Eventually he’ll get back into it, because you promised him that he would. You also want to see him thrive and you know that track is his passion. But for now, focus on the baby

Because of his knowledge of athletics, though, you’ve officially scored yourself a supportive trainer during your pregnancy! You WILL be walking at least a mile every day. At Least

Ryuji isn’t as fucked up as Akira and Akechi okay lmao he’s very sweet and loving

He also tries to get a handle on his yelling and swearing while you’re pregnant because he doesn’t want to have those habits once the baby is born

His mother is also very supportive and willing to have you live in her house once you become bigger and the baby is born

Ryuji will also start working more seriously to save up money so the two of you can live at your own place eventually, too

Just a lot of part-time jobs, but it’s better than nothing

Also never allows alcohol in the house and says once the baby is born, you can drink if you want, but just don’t do it in the house with the baby around for the sake of his comfort

Not that he doesn’t trust you, it’s just a comfort thing.

He also immediately told all of the thieves that he’s going to be a dad and he was immediately bombarded with shouting and questioning- especially from makoto- but BESIDES the initial reaction, he has all the support in the world from his friends and you guys get a lot of baby clothes and essentials from them. Mainly haru, bc she’s loaded and she loves you and Ryuji very much

Akira is officially the Uncle and Ann is the Aunt. No further questions

[donkey-hyuck]

𝑪𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒂𝒃; 𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑨𝒓𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒂: 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔

three card spreads↴

tarot cards;

the hermit (upright) 

contemplation, search for truth, inner guidance

strength (upright)

inner strength, bravery, compassion, focus

the emperor (reversed)

tyranny, rigidity, coldness

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

word count- 18,355 (woah wtf😳) 

genre- angst baby || fluff || yk just pure angst || high school! au in the beginning || college!au || bittersweet ||

characters/pairing- kinda popular kid!lee jeno x fem!volleyball player!reader || nct dream including mark || sooyoung

warnings- swearing | mentions of cheating but only accusations | dialogue heavy | lowercase letters intended | over usage of words bc i’m irrelevant | spelling/grammar mistakes | a whole relationship rollercoaster | jeno’s a dickhead | lots of self pondering

introduction- maybe you two just had enough of each other. being involved in one another’s lives could have just taken a huge toll on the both of you. so after finally separating practically your whole lives, you may both think you’re fine; but inside, neither of you can let each other go. one heated argument leads to another and you may have just lost your best friend, the love of your life… or maybe you didn’t…. or maybe you did.

taglist! @badwithten​, @jenoji​, @joyfuleggsfishbanana​, @proseeuhn​, @danishmiilk​

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

“mommy! jeno just pulled my hair!” your five year old self shouted as five year old jeno huffed and turned the other way. his mother had been out for the day for a job interview and your mother had promised to take care of him. the two of your mothers’ had been friends since middle school, grew up together, went through their adolescence, helped each other with university work. they were the best of friends, inseparable. and when they found out they were both pregnant at the same time, they were ecstatic to raise their children together.

you and jeno had known each other your entire lives up to that point. he was only four months older than you but he acted as if he was so superior, and it just made you ticked off. throughout elementary school—mostly kindergarten and first grade— the two of you never got along and fought constantly. your mothers’ tried to make you like each other but to no avail.

“mom! y/n pinched me!” five year old jeno yelled to his mother as you stuck your tongue out at him and crossed your arms. your mother had brought you along to their house when that happened and it just seemed as if the two of you would never get along.

but all that changed when you entered middle school. well, not completely, but you had his back when he needed it. mostly when you were forced to help tutor jeno in your science class, or when he had a crush on one of your good friends. he had your back too, telling you not to get into fights with the girls who thought they were so much better than you, or trying to set you up on dates with his friends. middle school was truly a place where you and jeno put away whatever feud the two of you had going on. middle school with jeno was actually fun, graduating your eighth grade class, messing around with teachers, meeting new friends. there was just so much enjoyment for the both of you during those years.

when high school came along, the two of you had been in separate classes, you being put in advanced placement and jeno being put in stem. that was kind of the first time you have been separated from each other at school. during your primary days, you and jeno had the same schedules and it seemed like fate wanted you two together. but when you entered high school, you were both more distant toward each other, specifically during all of junior and most of senior year.

freshman year was more of an experience. it was weird to not see jeno through the halls, let alone not have classes with him. but the two of you were just as inseparable as your mothers’, and met up with each other after school anyway, whether it was your mom picking the two of you up or his.

you were two peas in a pod and had seemed to always be teased by your peers, even when you denied liking each other. if it was true or not, no one had believed you and the two of you were stuck as the couple throughout the entirety of freshman year.

“true friends are never apart. maybe in distance but never in heart.” as you two said.

but new years of 2016 all changed the way jeno had perceived you. he was invited to a new years party with a few of his friends— na jaemin and lee donghyuck— and jeno had seemingly been gullible enough to believe the lies people were saying about you. about how you started the rumor of him dating a model his age from overseas, the rumor about him making out with younghee during his free period one thursday morning, or the rumor about him liking eunseo. he was furious to know that you were the one who spread all of the gossip around school, pushing past the idea that you and him had been connected by the hip since you were born. pushing past the idea that you truly weren’t like that. but jeno was enraged, nonetheless.

while he was feeding off of lies people had told him that night, your family— as well as his— were spending the new year right. you and your family had been invited to the lee’s for the countdown and you noticed your best friend wasn’t there.

“y/n! jeno’s not here, he’s with donghyuck and jaemin for a new years party tonight. i hope you won’t be bored here,” said his mother with a look of disappointment in her eyes. you shook your head and smiled, “it’s okay, aunty. i have minjung!” although you were excited to have some alone girl time with his older sister, jeno had never told you about attending a new years party that night. and to think about it more, hyuck nor jaem had told you either. it was weird. but you just pushed that all aside and walked down the hall to minjung’s room. at the time you were fifteen and she was eighteen and a well-known senior at your high school.

“minjung!” you bursted through her door and she immediately ran to hug you. “y/n! i missed you!” she hugged back as nal nudged your calf in a greeting. picking up the feline, you walked out of the room to eat and sit in the living room to play some family games.

your two families counted down together and it was officially 2016. your parents had decided to stay for another hour before going back home. but during that hour, hyuck’s mom had dropped off jeno and he was met with your families laughing and having the time of their lives together. another year, another long friendship that was to never end; or so your parents thought.

jeno came home upset that night. he felt betrayed and disappointed that you would say those things about him but all the more that made him angry. his mother had greeted him but he coldly shook it off and took to his room. you were shocked, jeno never acted that way towards his mother. you didn’t notice how quiet it was until your parents nudged you to talk to him.

“uhm.. aunty, uncle. i’ll go talk to jeno, see what’s up with him.” and for some unknown reason, you were nervous walking down to his bedroom.

carefully, you knocked and let yourself slide through the door, “jen…? are you okay? why’d you do that to your mom?” your voice was soft, just more of a way to not trust you. you were a hoax. at least, to jeno you were.

“i’m fine, y/n. get out of my room, i need to shower,” he rushed you out only making you want to say and ask a million questions about what was going on in that moment.

“no. what’s wrong with you? what happened tonight?” your brows furrowed and that was when he turned to you with stone cold eyes.

“none of your business. now get out!”

you don’t think jeno had made you cry since you were little but this was the first time a tear had shed because of the person you cared most about. however, you could never really recall why you cried that night. it wasn’t a bawling kind of cry, more of a sniffly kind of cry. whether it was frustration or shock, you walked out of his room as you wiped your tears with your sweater. it’s probably only a mood, you tried to convince yourself.

boy were you wrong.

the next few months were like this; you constantly trying to get jeno’s attention, crying about losing your best friend, and questioning what had happened to get him so upset at you. it was all a mind-fuck and you missed jeno. and by the time sophomore year was over, you and jeno had seemed to become less and less involved with each other when your parents were invited to their house or vice versa. around midway summer vacation before junior year, you stopped trying to get jeno’s attention because you clearly didn’t matter to him anymore.

both of your parents were confused as to why you stopped talking all of a sudden. you two still saw each other, yes, but there was nothing past the glaring looks of pure hatred. ever since that night, there was never a spare of words between the two of you and your mothers’ were worried.

one morning, before driving off to school, your mother had asked you, “y/n, why don’t you and jeno talk anymore?

“jeno, why don’t you and y/n talk anymore?”

“he’s a jerk, mom. it’s complicated.”

“she’s fake, mom. it’s complicated.”

—

graduation was two months away and it had been officially two years and a couple months since your friendship breakup.

“hello!! earth to y/n,” waved hyuck with his hands in front of your face. “what’s up with you right now?”

after breaking the news to mutual friends, donghyuck had been stuck between the two of you for the longest time but opted to just stay friends with you and jeno because that wasn’t a petty thing to do. jaemin on the other hand, was a different story. after jeno told jaemin you weren’t friends before he told hyuck, jaemin had texted you to meet by the library to ‘talk.’ turned out, jaemin wanted to stay loyal to his friend and disregard you and your feelings; and that was the end of that relationship. so you basically lost two of your bestest friends within a span of a week without a clue as to why. that was the big question, though…. why?

you blinked as you looked toward his direction. “what do you want, hyuck?” he sighed before answering, “first class is free period, dummy. mrs. choi isn’t here today.” you slowly sighed as well, as donghyuck took you by your hand and dragged you out of the empty classroom.

“let’s go to mr. park’s. we can stay there until class ends. today’s long period anyway,” he explained, dragging you down the hall and up two flights of stairs. donghyuck barged into the room causing everyone to immediately look at the loud boy crashing the lecture.

“lee donghyuck! y/f/n! what are you two doing here? shouldn’t you be in mrs. choi’s room?” mr. park raised a brow.

“ayy mr. park! y/n and i are here because mrs. choi couldn’t make it to class today. besides, you’re our favorite teacher, why else would we come here?” the teacher hummed and excused you to sit at his, fairly large, desk. “just don’t bother my students,” he warned, mostly talking to hyuck. he only responded in a wink and signed a ‘keep going.’

about twenty minutes of unproductive work had passed and you finally looked up to observe the students in mr. park’s stem class. his room wasn’t that big and there were only about nineteen to twenty-four kids in the class. scanning the room, your eyes were met with jeno’s. you slightly snickered as your eyes twitched in annoyance and turned to hyuck.

“hey, guess who’s here.” his brows furrowed as he looked around, finally getting to see jeno. but being the good friend that he was, hyuck waved at jeno before greeting him. they apparently had a handshake and mr. park seemed to notice as he told hyuck to sit back down and for jeno to focus on his work. the tan boy pouted before sitting back at his seat, making some of the girls laugh.

he came back to sit next to you and you rolled your eyes toward jeno and turned to the boy. “really?”

“whaaat? just because you two aren’t friends doesn’t mean that he and i can’t.” what hyuck said was true. you shouldn’t let your aggravation get the best of you. it was donghyuck’s decision to be and to not be friends with people. you huffed out a fine and turned back to your laptop that does not have any completed assignments— though there were only two that you hadn’t done yet. but you knew that free period class was gonna be torture for the next hour or so.

your second period class was, fortunately, in mr. park’s room with hyuck. however, jeno happened to have mrs. choi for second period and asked mr. park to stay in his class for the time being. so while the three of you waited for the students to attend, jeno and hyuck had been messing around and the room filled with their laughter. soon, as the teacher was getting ready for his class, a couple of your extroverted classmates joined along in their joking as you just sat quietly next to hyuck.

while ten minutes had passed of mr. park talking and explaining something along the lines of graphical analysis, hyuck whispered, “what’s up with you today? you’re eerily quieter than usual.” yeah… why were you quieter today?

“uh, i don’t know, hyuck. maybe i’m just not feeling it today, i guess,” you shrugged and looked back to the class work stuck on your desk. then your mind wandered off to the conversation you had with your mother that morning.

“how? you two were the best of friends. what happened to ‘true friends are never apart. maybe in distance but never in heart?’” she asked, shoving down a spoonful of rice. but you just shrugged and replied, “hm, i don’t know, mom. he hasn’t spoken a word to me since new years of 2016. it’s been two years. besides, if he doesn’t want to be friends with me without telling the reason, then that’s on him. i quit trying a long time ago.”

it was true. after jeno pushed you off on multiple occasions, you had stopped trying to get on good terms again. he was the immature one in the first place; you just tried to fix whatever was going on.

but soon enough, second period was over and out you were to mr. yang’s ap chemistry class. sooyoung— one of your closest girl friends— had happened to be in that class as well so when you entered the room she immediately called you over. you sat down at the lab table where she was seated and rested your face against it.

“what’s wrong, y/n?” she asked, making you look up at her while rubbing your face from all the questions about your sudden change in behavior.

“nothing much. well… mrs. choi isn’t here today so hyuck dragged me to mr. park’s class and that asshole lee jeno was in there,” you explained to her but she got confused because you never really associated yourself with him since the sudden split. she was about to ask why you were so caught up with him all of a sudden but it was as if you could read her mind because your next sentence was, “my mom asked me about him this morning. she’s still bugging me about why we aren’t friends… his mom too, i’m sure. and i’ve just been thinking about it. usually she would ask and i would answer the same and be fine but i guess today is just not my day.” you'd be lying if you said you didn’t miss lee jeno. you truly did. after all the shenanigans you’ve been through, lee jeno was always by your side.

ugh just stop thinking about it. you told yourself, mentally slapping your face and turning toward the board. but throughout the entire class, you did not pay attention to a word that came out of mr. yangs’ mouth.

once the bell rang, you were snapped out of your trance and quickly packed your things to go to your fourth class of the day— mrs. lim.

walking up the stairs, you met donghyuck in the halls and told him to hurry to mrs. lim’s class before she gets upset. providentially, mrs. lim was short period and there wasn’t much to do besides take notes.

“y/n who do you have next?” donghyuck asked as he waited for you to walk to the door and out to the hallway. “language with ms. jung. you should know this by now, hyuck,” you playfully shook your head and punched his shoulder. he ignored it and asked another question, “oh! so you have first lunch?” you nodded and walked down the stairs to the first floor library.

“yeah but i’m not gonna eat. plus, i don’t know anyone during my lunch.”

hyuck dramatically covered his mouth and gasped. “yes you do, what the fuck? hello… me, duh!” you laughed at his extra self and stuck your hands in your pockets. “i mean besides you. everyone wants to sit with you anyways. and you know i don’t really eat lunch.” your response only made him pout and look at you with a weird face expression. “you know i would rather sit with you any day right, y/n?” you smiled brightly and looked at him. “... i know, but i’m just not hungry. i’ll be in the library for lunch, and after ms. jung’s class. mrs. bae isn’t here today either so i’m just going to spend my time there.”

he muttered in disappointment as he dropped you off at the library before heading to the cafeteria.

“bye stupid. thanks for walking with me.” he smirked and turned around. “bye ugly. i’ll see you here in two hours. love you.”

“love you too.” but a pair of brown eyes watched the whole scene. the scene that made his heart slowly break.

you walked into the library and sat at a vacant three seater table and pulled out whatever you had to finish out of your bag. five minutes had passed of you typing on your computer when a fellow junior— park jisung— walked through the double doors and immediately recognized his favorite senior— you.

“y/n!” he whisper shouted while speed walking to the table you were sitting at. smiling at him, you pulled the chair next to you so he would have a place to sit. then you asked him why he was here.

“mrs. choi isn’t present today so i’m just gonna stay here. mrs. bae isn’t here either, chenle’s gonna come during last period too,” he explained while getting out his computer and a notebook. mrs. bae was your ceramics teacher and it seemed like there were a lot of teachers absent that day; but it was only a regular friday.

after conversing with jisung for another twenty minutes the loud bell signified the end of first lunch and off you were to your language class with ms. jung. you left the library after packing up and bidding jisung a short ‘see ya later.’

however, you forgot lee jeno was also in ms. jung’s class with you until you saw the back of his head turn straight into her room. fuck.

shortly after he walked in and sat down, you walked through the door and toward the back of the class to sit at one of the desks. and you swore jeno was eyeing you down as you passed him, and not in a good way.

but to jeno… he was eyeing you because he just missed you. he missed hanging out with you, especially during class. ever since he had that chat with his mom that morning— as well as seeing you with hyuck in mr. park’s class, and seeing you two announce your appreciation towards each other— he realized that he fucking missed you. so much.

that day was a friday too, so your parents were definitely going over the lee’s tonight. mentally, you rolled your eyes and shut your brain from thinking anything else and to just listen to what ms. jung had planned for the day.

school was boring, though. and your class just continued doing whatever you did during your class, prior.

“okay guys! we’re together for short period on monday, make sure you finish your research over the weekend. you’re free to go.”

you just stuffed your notebook into your bag and walked up the aisle. but you stopped right when jeno had dropped his pen. he picked it up and looked at you,  quietly apologizing. you hadn’t heard him, though; he was too quiet so you just paused until he picked it up and walked out of class to the front lobby. he should’ve just spoken up but he was too late.

mrs. bae didn’t have a substitute to fill in for her so you walked to the library, planning to sit at the same table which, thankfully, already seated chenle and jisung. you sat across from the boys and sighed, laying your head down again.

“what’s wrong?” asked chenle. you lifted your head up and lazily smiled before shaking your head.

“nothing. today’s just been tiring, that’s all. you two do your work. i’m gonna try to take a nap.” they both nodded and let you rest for the remaining time, making sure to wake you up before the bell rang.

—

“hyuck!” you ran up to him. he picked you up from your house that morning and so he was going to drop you off. “we have to pick up jangmi today. she stayed after school to help her teachers prepare for their spring formal.”

“really? sungho stayed after school too. what a coincidence,” he chuckled as he unlocked the car door and started it up. jangmi was your little sister in seventh grade and sungho was donghyuck’s younger brother in the same grade, attending the same school. what your poor little sister didn’t know was that sungho had a tiny little crush on her. so said from sungho to hyuck. it was cute.

they both greeted the two of you and talked about their day staying after school.

“are you guys going to the dance together?” asked donghyuck with a slight laugh, making sungho flush red and stutter, “uh.. i don’t know. it’s up to jangmi. but i don’t have a date yet.” his little brothers response made hyuck laugh and you hit his stomach.

“don’t make fun of sungho. it’s not nice. jangmi, do you have a date for the formal?” you looked at her through the rear view mirror. “no. i don’t even know if i wanna go yet.” hyuck laughed again but you flicked his cheek before he could say anything else to his brother. and then it got awkwardly quiet in the backseat of the acura tlx.

“bye, jangmi! bye, y/n!” said hyuck and his brother. “same time tomorrow morning?” he asked after rolling down the window some more. you responded with a nod and walked into your house after waving one last time to the pair of siblings. only to be met with your mother rushing the two of you to change into something formal. your sister whined and asked why.

“we’re meeting at kwonsooksoo to have dinner with the lee’s.”

“but it’s only three p.m. why do we have to get ready now?” you furrowed your brows.

“because i know you girls will take forever. plus, it’s almost a two hour drive from here. we’re supposed to be meeting them at 7:30.”

that was a typical friday night. each of your parents spending way too much money on food that’ll be half finished by the time you left, awkward and nasty looks between you and jeno, and quiet conversations of you and minjung followed by jeno and jangmi.

so while fixing up the makeup on your face, you slowly stopped swiping the brush on your face and looked in the mirror at your reflection, then to the bedside table where you remember you hid a scrapbook from years ago. setting the brush down on your desk, you turned in the chair you were sitting in and opened the drawer to pick up the polaroid picture filled book.

covering the cream colored pages were silly pictures of the two of you from birth to elementary school, fun patterns of washi tape, and the messy handwriting of you and jeno. looking through the reminiscent book, you remembered the stash of old friendship items in a large shoe box hiding under your bed. quickly, you scrambled to the floor and dragged the dusty, wood-like box from its place.

you opened the top of the box and it looked like how you remembered it looked like when you packed it up two years ago. in the box contained some more photo albums and scrapbooks, a few framed pictures, letters that jeno wrote for your birthday—your seventh, tenth, and fourteenth— a few sheets of guitar notes, and a friendship bracelet each of you made for each other. and looking through all of the memories, a single tear had dropped from your face just as your mother walked in the room. she was going to tell you they were ready to leave until she stopped mid sentence, immediately looking sad at her daughter crying because of the friendship she used to have.

“auh… y/n,” her voice was soft as she knelt on the floor and cupped your cheeks in her palms. you just cried and hugged her, constantly saying that you missed him. you missed lee jeno so damn much. and you could never say it enough.

the lee’s never saw you that night. after that whole breakdown, your mother thought it was best to not let you go. it could’ve caused more erect feelings and she didn’t want that for you, even if she did want you to tell jeno that you missed him. but she didn’t force it on you, and they left the house to meet the lee’s without you.

the following hour, a knock was heard at your door.

it was na jaemin.

jaemin had lived in the area, but you were confused and shocked by his presence back in your life. hesitantly, you unlocked the door and there he stood. from the outside, you probably looked emotionless but on the inside, you were freaking the fuck out.

“na jaemin..? what are you doing here?” you had been straight to the point, not wanting to see his face any longer. but he just dryly chuckled and said, “my mom cut the power at my house. it’s gonna be out for a few days but i just wanted to see if you still lived in the area.” it sounded like he was mocking you and it made your eye twitch in annoyance and asked him what he wanted and why he was here.

“whaat? i can’t see an old friend?” that made you pissed and you shoved the door closed. though na jaemin had a fast reflex, and caught the door with his foot before opening it again. this time, your hand was rested on your hip and the other was holding the door, preventing it to be fully opened.

“we don’t like each other, remember. now spill it or i’ll crush your toes with my door.” you were still as sassy as he remembered and it made him genuinely smile this time.

“calm down, princess. i just really wanted to know if you were home since, you know, you and jeno’s family are out.” how did he know? lee jeno, that’s how. you just rolled your eyes and opened the door wider than it was before he just invited himself in your house. didn't he have any respect?

walking in after him, you watched as he sat down on your couch and you leaned on the wall. the space of your living room was quiet until he broke the silence.

“jeno said that you didn’t go with your family today… that’s why i’m here, okay.” he looked at you with guilt in his eyes.

to be honest, you missed jaemin almost as much as you missed jeno. you confessed it to hyuck, and you were almost 100% sure he told at least jaemin that you missed the two.

“i’m sorry,” he whispered out, “i miss you y/n… jeno and i both.”

you looked to the floor then back to the blonde boy, unbelievably. the boys were pranksters and this could be a sick joke.

“don’t lie to me, na,” you hissed out and pushed yourself off the wall to walk into the kitchen, jaemin following after. he sat at the island and watched as you rummaged through the fridge to find something to drink.

“i’m being sincere. we miss you a lot.”

scoffing, you left the kitchen to walk to your room. but you looked back at jaemin, sighed, and motioned him to follow you up to your room.

your room was still the same. the first door to the right when you walk up the stairs. of course, it had been revamped, but it still eluded the energy he always sensed from you since the two of you met. staring at jaemin scanning your room, you remembered how observant he was.

jaemin always knew when something was up, whether it was you being sad, you being frustrated, or when you were just zoning out. he knew you like the back of his hand, even if you didn’t know it. he was quiet but knowledgeable.

while looking around the room, jaemin noticed the old  photo albums opened and scattered on your bed. he walked to your bed and picked up the butterfly scrapbook. flipping through the pages, he smiled, and even slightly chuckled at the childish pictures and humorous comments that filled each page. when he was done looking through that photo book, he patted the seat next to him for you to sit down. grabbing the next scrapbook— a pokémon themed title page— he opened it up and leaned his head on your shoulder, causing you to freeze up.

it was as if he knew there were lots of pictures of him and hyuck in that specific book. it was your eighth grade memory book and you had known hyuck and jaemin for three years prior to that. the sweet smile was still on his face the entire time he flipped through the pages. he read and detected every picture and every little blurb of writing on each page, knowing whose handwriting was who’s.

“i missed this a lot,” he muttered while caressing the printed out picture of the four of you during your eighth grade graduation ceremony. then he glanced up at you. looking nowhere in particular, you whispered out, “me too. so much.” jaemin then sat up and faced you, wiping the tears escaping your eyes. you then looked at him.

“you know, y/n… jeno still has the friendship bracelet you made him,” he said, looking at the colorful arrangement of beads sitting on the floor. “actually, jeno has a lot of things in his room that remind him of you.” he leaned his head against your shoulder once more, lightly wrapping his arms around you to embrace your figure in a hug. then you leaned your head against his, slightly sniffling away the tears and picking up the last scrapbook you made before you stopped being friends.

flipping through the pages, jaemin recollected all the memories from two to three years ago in high school. about halfway through the book, the pictures soon came to a stop. the rest of the pages were left blank. he lifted his head up and there was a frown present on his face.

“you didn’t finish filling it out?” he questioned, getting up and closing the book.

“i didn’t get to. we stopped talking after new years.” he looked back at the page that was last filled. it was pictures of your families together during christmas eve playing secret santa. flashes of smiling faces and wrapping paper on the floor.

‘december 24, 2015, christmas eve. i hung these pictures up late this year. it’s currently january second and jeno won’t talk to me since new years night. i didn’t have the guts to put these pictures in here but these were the last pictures i had of us all being happy. i don’t think he wants to talk to me anyways…. happy new year and goodbye for now, it’s been fun :( - y/n’

jaemin’s heart broke while holding the crinkled paper in his hands. as strong as he was, mentally, his tears dripped onto the last filled page and looked to you. a single tear falling as he blinked. without a word, jaemin embraced you in a warm and comforting hug. a hug you missed for years.

slowly, you wrapped your arms around your ex-best friend as tears puddled your shoulder as he cried harder and harder. and after the ten minute crying session, jaemin had been rather sniffly and puffy eyed. feeling bad and somewhat guilty, you let jaemin stay over your house to have some takeout with you.

“is that why you didn’t go with your family tonight?” he asked, gulping down his water.

“yeah. i was getting ready and then i just remembered about it. the next thing i knew, i was looking through those pictures and crying... my mom felt bad and didn’t want me to go.” he just nodded in acknowledgment and placed down the cup. it was quiet for a few moments before a text message notification was heard.

“i gotta go. my mom’s wondering where i am.” you walked him to the door and opened it, bidding him a goodbye before he trudged down the street toward his house. just as you shut the door, your mother called you that they were almost home.

packing up the food, and tidying up your room, the jiggling keys caught your attention. it was only about 9:45 and your father walked in, followed by your family, and along came the lee’s. of course.

you scurried up the stairs and kicked the box of memories under your bed just as your father opened the door. you turned to him with your hands folded in front of you and awkwardly smiling.

“pooh! the lee’s are here, come say hi.” you figured your mother hadn’t told your father about the little scene she had witnessed. to be honest, he didn’t know how to react in those kinds of situations so you were kind of glad he was oblivious.

you ushered down the stairs in your easter pajamas and hugged mr and mrs. lee. while hugging them, they said they missed you for dinner and asked what was wrong.

“my stomach hurt a little bit earlier and mom said i could stay home for tonight. i’m glad to see you guys, though!” they cheered and nodded as they looked at their son, motioning— with their eyes— to talk to you.

jeno cleared his throat and greeted you with a small ‘hi’ before jangmi dragged him to her room. everyone remaining sighed and went to the living room while you just walked back up to your room. jangmi’s bedroom was diagonally across from yours and you couldn’t help but to eavesdrop on their conversation.

“jangmi… what would you say if i said that-” you quit listening and shut the door to your room. blowing the baby hairs out of your face,  you looked around your room and was face to face with the guitar sitting in the corner of your room. it was the guitar jeno had bought for your last birthday since you stopped talking. picking up the guitar, you sat back on your bed and grabbed the music sheet from the box, playing the nostalgic tune you and jeno had randomly come up with one day after school.

stepping out of your sisters’ room to go to the bathroom, jeno instantly heard the old song playing in his ears and leaned his head to your closed door. a small smile appeared on his face as he named the notes in his head. his father had come up the stairs and startled jeno, making him move his hand against the elongated doorknob and open your door, causing him to fall back first onto the floor of your bedroom.

you promptly stood up in surprise and your eyes were wide open. was he there the whole time? what was he even doing?

jeno swiftly picked himself off the ground and scratched his head in embarrassment, looking back to his dad who gave him the look. so entering your room and closing the door, you’re met with jeno’s gaze. your heart was pounding and your breathing was heavy, as was his.

tears glossed over your eyes again until he spoke up. “....you still have the music sheet to that?” he refused to look at you.

you gulped and replied, “yeah… i was just, uh, going through some of my old stuff. i found it earlier.” the tension between the two of you was thick and no one wanted to say a word after that.

“uhm.. well, i guess i’ll get going. jangmi’s probably waiting for me.” he was about to leave until he heard your sniffling. he immediately turned around and saw you with your head down and the guitar laying on the floor. he recalled the guitar he bought you for your fifteenth birthday. calmly walking towards your fragile figure, jeno asked what was wrong.

“... you jerk…” you took a deep breath in and looked up at him. “get out of my room… please. jangmi’s waiting…” in that moment, jeno realized that he didn’t want to leave, he wanted to stay with you. so he did the next best thing, walked out, informed your sister in what was going on, quickly walked back to your room and hugged you as tight as he could. maybe your best friend was back.

he just constantly shushed you and held you like you were a piece of glass getting ready to break. one of his hands held your waist and the other held your head against his chest as he swung the two of you back and forth, slowly. jeno just let you cry in his embrace as small tears fell from his eyes as well. the only sounds that filled the room were the sobs that escaped your mouth.

during the time, jangmi had rushed down the stairs to let your parents know what was happening at that very moment. it was a miracle to know that you two were actually close to each other in the same room. you two were true friends, indeed.

the night ended with you drained out and falling asleep against jeno’s chest. just as he and his parents were going to leave, jeno made sure to tuck you in bed and bid you a small goodnight before shutting the lights and leaving with his parents.

—

the following morning— around nine in the morning— you were awoken by the alarm you had set prior. you can feel the puffy of your eyes and instantly remember the night before. you and jeno hugged. you were crying and jeno comforted you. to some degree, there was a small smile on your face as you stretched to get ready for work.

you worked at some pho restaurant— pho-nomenal— downtown and hyuck promised to drop you off even though you were fully capable of driving to work yourself. but he just insisted and said he was going to eat pho with a friend.

“y/n! hyuckie is here!” screamed your sister from downstairs. you replied just as loud saying you were tying up your hair. you said goodbye to your parents and told them you were off work at four.

getting in the car you screamed out what happened last night. donghyuck pretended to be shocked. jeno had  already told him by the time they left your house. and hyuck told him that you were working in the morning and to have some pho before off to a college interview.

checking in, sooyoung had greeted donghyuck and sat him down at an open table. he then proceeded to ask sooyoung to ask you to serve for his table. did you mention that sooyoung had a teensy crush on said boy?

she was a little upset but you two were best friends so she just nodded and went to the back to say you had company.

“hyuck, what do you want? why didn’t you let sooyoung serve you today?” you whined while placing down two menus and a buzzer on the table. “because i want you to,” he shrugged and looked past your figure to see jeno walk through the doors. looking back to where your friend was looking, you directly saw jeno as well. that sneaky little prick.

growling and flipping him off, you walked back to the front desk and grabbed some more menus to serve the other people that filled the restaurant.

coming back to hyuck and jeno’s table, you were unable to look jeno in the eyes as he ordered first. when he was finished, you glared at hyuck as he hid his laughter behind the menu. going to the back room, you called out the order and clipped it onto the board and walked back out to stand in front of the main desk. the restaurant wasn’t that busy in the morning so you and your coworkers stood at the front ready to greet other customers and get the meals prepared.

when their food was ready, you rang the buzzer and up came lee jeno. you were going to kill lee donghyuck.

sooyoung and a couple other coworkers were unavailable so you were the only one to give jeno their food.

just as he was about to talk, you gave them their meal and mumbled, “enjoy your food.” it was all too abrupt. but he thanked you and walked down back to the table. both he and donghyuck sighed. you were too stubborn.

“no, hyuck. she’s just scared to be friends with me again. i mean, i would be too if she did that to me. we’ve been best friends since diapers…. sorta… but i still know what kind of person she is,” jeno said, slurping down his noodles and looking at your back as you were preparing some drinks for the other customers. the other boy just shook his head and got ready to take another bite.

once they were finished, and their finished food was taken care of, jeno offered to pay for the meal, just so he could talk to you. as desperate as hyuck was to have the two of you interact, he would be lying if he said he wasn’t happy that jeno was paying just for the sake of your relationship.

“total is $16.83,” you hadn’t even said a complete sentence. sure it made sense but it wasn’t complete; and it broke jeno’s heart that you didn’t want to see him anymore. glancing up, donghyuck gives you a look and you already know what he’s going to text you later. rolling your eyes at him, you give jeno his change back. your hands brushed against each other as you handed back his coins and it made jeno slightly shiver.

the rest of the day was pretty boring. some of the same customers, everyone ordering the same things, the busy back room. as your shift was coming to an end, you got a text from hyuck that jeno and jaemin were coming along to pick you up. just great.

hanging up your apron, you texted your mom that the boys, though you told her only hyuck, was going to pick you up from work and drop you off. you groaned and walked outside after saying your goodbyes to your crew mates.

“hurry up, donghyuck! it’s going to rain, i can hear the thunder,” you nagged while persistently looking around to spot his car. “okay, okay, i’m down the street. hold your horses.”

finally pulling into the parking lot, donghyuck stopped in front of you and you climbed into the back seat next to jaemin. he and you had exchanged phone numbers the previous night and it seemed like he was back to his affectionate self. he greeted you with a hug from the side and showed off his charming smile and pearly whites. you awkwardly hugged him back, not knowing you two were already in this stage of becoming friends again. jeno looked back through the mirror, he was jealous jaemin was working so fast and already making little progress.

“y/n… i forgot to tell you that we’re all staying the night,” hyuck mockingly laughed. “i already told your mom too. jangmi’s excited.” he finished with a teasing wink. oh brother, you mentally rolled your eyes, sighing into the leather seat.

“cheer up y/n! we can catch up..” jaemin’s sentence became less enthusiastic. you just slightly smiled and looked at him, “okay then.” and it was quiet for the rest of the ride.

opening the door, jangmi’s voice is heard from the opposite side yelling at your dad, “dad! y/n, hyuck, jaemin, and jeno are here!” the boys laughed and all took off their shoes before greeting your sister and father.

“pooh! mom’s at the grocery store right now. you’ll have to help her put away the stuff when she comes back,” he informed. you just nodded with a yes and told them to follow you up to your room. then it got you wondering. three boys sleeping over a girls house at the age of eighteen? curse lee donghyuck.

at around 6 p.m. or so, your mother comes through the door and asks for help to bring the groceries in while she’s greeting the three boys.

“hi boys. i’m glad you could stay the night here! and i’m happy you four are friends again.” your eyes shut from embarrassment and told your mom that there was one last gallon of water in the trunk.

after putting the food and whatnot away, you all walked back upstairs and it was silent for a good few moments. “uhm, we have some extra towels and i think i have some toothbrushes in my closet. you guys can just sleep on the inflatable bed, it’s all we have.” jaemin clicked his fingers. “duh, our stuff is in hyuck’s trunk. we packed everything y/n, don’t worry. i mean, besides the bed but you know what i mean.” you chuckled and nodded as they went back outside to get their belongings. however, jeno had asked them to bring up his bag and so it was just the two of you again.

you were playing with your fingers when he said, “...i’m happy you’re letting us in..” you looked up at him and shyly smiled. “it’s the least i could do. we used to be friends so…”

“yeah but i want to change that, y/n. i want us to be best friends again. remember  ‘true friends are never apart. maybe in distance but never in heart’?” his heart hurt and he was physically in pain. as much as you wanted to yell at him that this was all his fault, you didn’t have the guts to. because he’s back and he wants to be friends again.

the night ended with all of you huddled on your bed watching some thriller tv show that hyuck chose. though you weren’t paying attention at all. the four of you talked throughout the night and looked back on all the memories from middle school to freshman year.

“yeah, yeah! remember when we dared y/n to sit next to mark lee? that was gold! i still have those pictures on my phone!” exclaimed jeno while scrolling to the top of his photo album on his phone. your eyes were widened and your face flushed red, remembering the embarrassing moment.

“ugh stop. i didn’t even like mark lee like that,” you said, covering your face in the palms of your hand. mark lee was your senior at the time of that incident. you were fifteen and he was sixteen. your friends and mark all had the same lunch; but being the popular boy he was, mark lee was sitting with his other friends. they were recalling that you had a supposed crush on the boy and when they had the chance, forced you to sit next to him. it was all just humiliating sitting next to someone everyone thought you had a crush on. and you knew mark heard about those rumors going around.

“yeah okay, y/n. keep saying that,” hyuck smirked and rolled his eyes. jaemin was just laughing and having a good time listening to the conversations going on.

around midnight jangmi walked through your door and joined in on some of the joking the boys were doing. “get out jangmi! we’re talking about high school stuff, plus mom’s gonna be mad at you tomorrow,” you scolded, making her stick her tongue out and hug the older boys goodnight. brat.

you don’t remember when, but when you woke up the next morning, the only person who was sleeping was jeno. jaemin and hyuck were awoken an hour prior and they wanted to let the two of you rest since you were both notorious for going to sleep late and waking up late.

it was only ten in the morning but you pushed yourself out of bed to wash your face and brush your teeth. when you walked down the stairs, the aroma of food entered your senses and jaemin avidly greeted you.

“good morning y/n! we were about to wake you and jeno up but since you’re awake, go tell jeno food’s ready.” he turned you around to face the stairs. sighing, you walked up the stairs and back into your room.

carefully shaking jeno, you repeat, “wake up, food’s ready.” being the lazy bum he was, turned the other way then threw a pillow to your face.

“stop bothering me, monkey.” you were in a trace. monkey and bubba; that’s what you two called each other. you stared at his back, but somehow he felt more awake and sort of uncomfortable. shifting around, he turned to you and sat up.

“what’s wrong with you all of a sudden?” he questioned, waving a hand in front of your face. he must have just blabbed that out while he was half conscious and wasn’t paying attention.

“.... eat. my mom, jaem, and hyuck made breakfast,” you mumbled and walked out the door and down the stairs. from then on he wondered what had gotten into you. but while he was getting ready he remembered what he had said. monkey, the nickname he gave you when you were both eleven. jeno then wondered what would happen if he continued to call you monkey. would you be all flustered? would you complain and yell at him? or would you call him bubba? he’d hope you’d call him bubba again. he missed your nicknames.

your friends and family all enjoyed breakfast together, and your mother was stoked to have the four of you back before leaving for college. instead of the three musketeers, it was the four musketeers. you, lee jeno, lee donghyuck, and na jaemin.

after breakfast, they left to run their errands or start their schedules for the day.

—

while monday started, you wondered if jaemin and jeno would talk to you. welp, only one way to find out.

driving your way to school, hyuck had texted you where you were.

i’m on my way, just wait omg sent, 7:28 a.m.

parking your car and walking towards the front lobby, the two boys pushed through the row of doors and rushed to you. jaemin, being much more comfortable, hugged you and hyuck joined soon after. jeno was a bit on the slower side, deciding to tone down his excitement.

“ayy look at this cool guy,” jaem turned around and teased jeno as he walked to you with his hands in the pockets of his sweater. the boy just smirked and shook his head.

“morning monkey.” you tensed again, then turned pink since the energetic boys stood confused. “monkey? is that what we’re calling y/n now? because i’m totally up for it!” exclaimed hyuck.

your eyes widened and shouted, “no! you guys are not going to call me monkey. that was just a nickname he used to call me.”

jaemin spoke up, “really? since when? how come we’ve never heard this ‘monkey’ come out of jeno’s lips until right in this moment?” you glared at jeno and responded, “it was just a thing between the two of us. besides, you know i have nicknames for both of you, too.” the two boys just rolled their eyes as jeno smiled and cheered in some sort of victory. you stuck out your tongue and caught up with the salty boys who were a couple feet ahead.

but during the walk to first period, in which mrs. choi wasn’t there again, the trio was greeted by everyone as they looked at you, questioning to themselves why you were hanging out with jeno and jaemin. some even forgot the four of you were a thing, and some just didn’t know.

“woah, y/n hanging with them? nana and jen?!”

“i thought they stopped being friends…?”

“damn. i haven’t seen ‘em together since sophomore year.”

and other variations were heard throughout the halls as you, hyuck, and jeno went to drop off jaemin in mrs. moon’s room before walking to mr. park’s.

right when you three walked through the doors, mr. park playfully sighed and gave you and hyuck a look. then looking at the students whispering and already starting to gossip. oh great.

while loosely paying attention to the teachers lesson, you looked around the room, hyuck doing his work and occasionally looking up, some students— of which were mostly female— looking between you and jeno, and jeno, continuously peering over to you. when you met eye contact, he was quick enough to look away and act as if he was taking notes. was jeno really starting to like you? again?

he would probably never admit it but during eighth and ninth grade years, jeno developed the tiniest, and by tiniest he really had the biggest, crush on you. of course, you never knew, only seeing him as family and one of your bestest and closest friends. but it was all in the past and he kind of figured you never really liked him like that anyway.

you diverted your attention back to the laptop screen and started doing some more research for your language class. but as the seconds ticked by, jeno started to glance at you more and more, especially since he knew you were no longer paying attention to his class.

before you knew it, first class was over and you and hyuck sat at your seats in the same room. jeno just stayed in his seat but tapped the desk to the right of him to signify for you to sit there. sort of uncomfortably, you plopped yourself onto the desk and took out whatever you needed for his class. him and hyuck talked, as usual, but jeno made sure to include you since you were now both on speaking terms.

small smiles and shy laughter. it’s always been who you were, it’s always been one of the reasons why jeno fell for you. the whole school scene was just always too overwhelming for you, much rather being on the quieter side. it probably never seemed like it back in middle school but you were always way too much of a nervous wreck to actually do something bad. you were all bark and no bite.

so when class started, and students started to fill the desks one by one. kyong, a well-known— but basic— popular classmate came walking into the room, planning to sit in her seat, which was next to jeno, whom she subtly liked. but seeing you sit there all of a sudden startled her.

“hi, y/n,” she smiled with flames burning in her eyes. “uh that’s my seat, i’m sorry.”

you looked her in the eyes and apologized, getting ready to pack your things to sit next to hyuck until jeno stopped you from doing so and said, “there’s no assigned seats kyong. just go sit next to…. jihoon,” he pointed across the room. her eyes twitched slightly before smiling again and walking to sit next to the knocked out boy.

throughout the class, jeno and hyuck proceeded with their joking around until mr. park had enough and turned around. giving them the ‘you are a senior in high school’ speech. but to be fair, they were being a biiiit immature.

directly after the bell rang, you went straight to mr. yang’s lab class and sat next to sooyoung, after you said goodbye to jeno and hyuck. immediately explaining your weekend out to her.

“i’m sorry he WHAT?”she whisper-shouted hoping mr. yang wouldn’t hear. unfortunately he did and shushed her before moving onto the next part of the lesson he was teaching. you just made a face and nodded before returning back to your notes, sooyoung still in astonishment.

when ms. jung’s class arrived— which was after mrs. lim’s— you sat right where you had been sitting. but before you walked past him like he wasn’t there, jeno greeted you with a smile. thankfully, you did return it and got yourself situated for that class.

—

once your classes were over, you walked to your car and started the engine before jeno called you on your phone. confused, you picked up.

“hello? why are you calling me?” it sounded a bit rude but you didn’t mean for it to come out like that.

“i just wanted to ask if you left yet. you just speeded out the room and i kinda…. sorta…. need a ride,” he elongated the last part of his sentence. you sighed and replied, “can’t you drive? i know you took your drivers permit. and i know you have a license.”

“my car’s in the shop, getting the tires fixed. hyuck picked me up,” he laughed.

“then didn’t you leave with him?”

“that ass left before i had the chance. please, y/n?” he whined and you could practically hear his pout. roughly, you sighed and breathed out ‘fine.’ it seemed like ever since you were nice to each other again, the little prick had been taking advantage of you. but that wasn’t jeno, right?

just as he shut the passenger seat door, you said that you had to pick up jangmi before dropping him off.

“i’m cool with that. besides, jangmi loves me,” he bragged. you just snorted and rolled your eyes before driving off to her school

when you arrived at her middle school, she peered through the passenger window and straight away, a smile was placed on her lips. she opened the door, “jeno! you’re coming home with us today? where’s aunty?” he just laughed and turned his head to her before answering.

“no. y/n is just dropping me off today, and maybe the rest of this week,” his sentence trailed off as he looked at you, only for you to look back and scowl at him.

“maybe tomorrow. if y/n allows me,” the damn teasing tone in his voice. jangmi looked at you with hopeful eyes through the mirror.

“what? it’s not my house. plus jeno’s probably gonna make me not take him home after school anyways.” you were quite annoyed with the duo. as much as you love them, they were a pain in the ass.

dropping jeno off jangmi asked, “what happened between you two?” you just laughed and responded with a little shake of your head, leaving her confused and complaining that you were a bad sister and a bad friend.

“i am not! you’re just too young,” you teased her again since the age difference between her and you was significant. more so, significant enough.

—

graduation day. thursday, june 14th. the day you would remember forever.

it was the morning of senior graduation. nothing much was going on, just the hectic scene of constant practices and nervousness.

“i cannot believe we’re graduating high school together! first middle school and now this!” clapped jaemin with his cheery smile. all four of you were glad to be together in that moment at that time, together. after the feud, your relationship had been stronger than ever and you were all glad.

your parents had come together the couple previous days in order to plan your surprise graduation party for the four of you. it was to be held at your house, as your mom insisted to your dad, so when you all got home, your friends and families would be there.

prior to you leaving the school auditorium, your parents had treated you to some ice cream money before ushering the four of you to go out and have some celebratory treats so they could prepare the little party.

when you reached your house, it was eerily quiet. their parents had parked a couple streets down to hide the fact that they were all a part of the surprise party. so after you walked through the door, all your friends and family popped out of their hiding places and yelled ‘congratulations!’

every since you and jeno got close again, he started to realize his feelings had been coming back. and this time they came by and hit him like a whole truck. once he knew about the party— because of his loudmouth parents— he knew it then. jeno was going to confess.

but he was scared; as he should be. he was scared to lose the friendship he just gained back, but he was also scared of losing the relationship with jaemin and donghyuck. but it was worth a shot. it was all or nothing. besides, there was a chance your feelings could be reciprocated, right?

so while the sun was setting and the bonfire was getting started, jeno was seated next to you at the swings with no one to bother you. he made sure to tell his plan to hyuck and jaem— and also your beloved family— so they wouldn’t mess it up. but when jeno found the courage to speak up, the bundle of nerves distracted his thought process and he was spitting out stutters.

“hey, bubba. you okay?” your face showed concern which did not help the situation he was in.

“yeah, i’m okay,” he was upset at himself for not having the balls to confess to his first love. will he have enough courage to confess later? only time will figure it out.

looking off to your family, jeno was having a mid-war crisis in his mind. beating himself up for being so quiet all of a sudden. but while the silence followed between you and jeno, you had been having a hell-of-a-ton of questions and statements in your mind as well.

why couldn’t you confess to him already?

man up. it’s just jeno. no matter what happens you two will always stay friends. at least that’s what you hoped.

as the amount of misquotes grew larger, and the purples and pink in the sky turned blue, jaemin and hyuck had gone to the closest supermarket to pick up some s’mores for everyone to enjoy. gathering around the campfire, everyone made their own marshmallow goodness and joked the night away. until the swarming mosquitoes started to bite everyone.

and while the crickets were heard, everyone was in the living room playing your family time games with a twist. but you ended the night with a movie— or two. so as you were busy making the popcorn, your friends and families all crowded jeno and asked if he had confessed yet. awkwardly, jeno declined and admitted that he hadn’t said a word about his feelings to you. your parents had then ushered him to say a little something about his feelings toward you.

mustering up whatever sort of bravery he had, jeno trotted his way to the kitchen where you were preparing the last batch of popcorn for everyone. he leaned his figure to the wall, admiring you for a moment before softly clearing his throat to catch your attention.

just go up to her, dammit. jeno repeated in his head.

“uh— you know, monkey. i uh— we should— i kinda wanna go to the mall and— no we should go to that new seafood restaurant— no no, scratch that…. but can we-” you interrupted his cute rambling before resting your hand on his chest and kissing his cheek.

“i got the message jen,” you laughed. “of course i’d go out with you this weekend.” by the time he walked back to the living room, he was a ball of goo and all eyes were on him; especially your family. just by the look of his face when he came back, they all knew what you had said, and it was affirmative.

—

your first date that next weekend went by perfectly. jeno had ended up taking you to an aquarium and dinner for the evening and it was the best date you’ve ever had. really, it was the only meaningful date but best, nonetheless.

appreciatively, the date you and jeno and went on was not awkward at all. it was just as if you two were just hanging out as friends, but of course, better.

you were just joking along with each other and recalling smaller, more precious memories between the two of you before the conversation got a little more serious.

“i got accepted into yonsei university!” he exclaimed, not knowing you had also applied to the university and got accepted a few days prior.

“congratulations bubba! i got accepted too!” he cheered at you and gripped your hand in affirmation and proudness.

now you knew. maybe you two were truly meant to be.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

a brand new start.

august 29th. first day of the new semester of a new year, a whole mouthful.

the major you had chosen for your path at yonsei was interior architecture. jeno was majoring in computer software and media applications.

luckily, you and jeno had classes about the same times on the same days so you each had time to briefly see each other on campus or meet up while you’re both free. it was a little hard to adapt at first, but you two were champs and still even had time to meet up with hyuck and even sooyoung— who both went to hanyang university— and jaemin— who attended hongik university.

“monkey!” yelled jeno who was about ten feet in front of you. your class had just ended and you were just walking around the entrance of jeno’s building, waiting for him.

“sorry i was late. professor oh kept us back,” he scratched the back of his head. only for you to shake your head and give him a ‘no worries’ smile. it was a thursday and you and jeno had some sports meetings right after class. once again, with the same schedule. it wasn’t a bad thing, not at all. but there were times where you wished you never hung out so much. even so, you loved jeno— in fact, you were the first to pull the ‘i love you’ card a few weeks back.

walking to the campus gymnasium, the both of you get changed into athleisure attire and separated ways, jeno to the field and you just a couple of walks to the gymnasium. you had been playing volleyball to stay fit and to find a hobby while living the college life. jeno, to much surprise, continued to pursue football during his college years, so as to stay fit and to keep his passion of playing football alive.

“i’ll see you later, monkey. we have community service later, yeah?” he asked while greeting some of his teammates. you nodded and waved to your girls before jeno smiled lovingly at you and held your chin in his hand to peck your lips. teasingly, he winked and walked to where the boys went out. shaking your head at him playfully, you walked into the gym to start with some stretches and warmups.

apparently you were the best woman on the volleyball team so the girls immediately nominated you as team captain. discussing about the plans your coach had given you prior, the girls stopped chatting and got straight to practice. chanmi was one of your peers on the team who was seemingly jealous of you; of which you did not know she was, but it was better for her to know rather than for you. you had just thought that she didn’t like you, like, at all.

“ugh i don’t understand why y/n is team captain. it’s not fair,” she complained to her friend one morning. you were on an early coffee run for you and jeno when you heard her familiar ringing voice. following them from a distance, chanmi just continued to talk bad about you which made you sad realizing that she didn’t like you.

“plus she gets lee jeno. i heard he’s the best on the football team,” she whined again, “and he’s the hottest, no doubt.” her friend agreed before gushing over your boyfriend when he appeared behind you, covering your eyes and making you guess who. rolling your eyes you turned around and gave him his drink before walking to class together. the two of you had literature together— with chanmi— and it seemed she hated you even more, especially after you walked in the room with jeno’s hand around your waist, standing impossibly closer to you. but it wasn’t your fault his hand was there anyways.

ever since that day, all you received from her was snarky remarks and burning glares. and she almost never complied to you or your requests which was why the coach was having thoughts about kicking her off the team.

when your volleyball practice was over, you quickly refreshed yourself and gathered your things to walk to the football field to watch jeno finish his practice.

sitting on the bleachers, however, was chanmi— who coincidentally was jaemin’s cousin— and her little friend vigorously cheering for the boys. about five minutes passed before jeno walked to you and downing his water, saying that today’s practice was going to be a little longer than usual so you both might be late to the tutor sessions you planned to help some of the younger kids.

“it’s okay, bub. i’ll just stay here and go over some notes. i have an exam tomorrow,” you explained and looked up at him with squinted eyes. he looked around before looking back at you, catching chanmi’s attention before saying, “okay. don’t overwork that brain of yours,” he laughed as he skittishly poked your head.

“also, do you have an extra water bottle? i need it desperately, coach is working us extra hard today for some reason.” you nodded and fished out your metal water bottle to give to him. “thanks, monkey,” he kissed your temple and returned to the field where everyone was waiting.

enviously, chanmi watched the scene with her eyes and she felt as though she wanted to barf; oh how desperately she wanted to be in your place, though. it seemed as if you and jeno had the perfect relationship. of course there were the doubts but you and jeno managed to pull through and you’re as strong as ever. in which chanmi daydreamed about her perfect relationship, somehow throwing jeno into the mix. “the perfect man,” as she called him.

during the beginning of the year, when chanmi first found out about her fellow peers, some more than most, she was instantly interested in you and jeno. the constant questions of ‘are they friends?’ or ‘are they actually a couple?’ flowed throughout your classmates' mouths and you and jeno had proven to them that you were in a relationship, and very serious about it.

she sat closer to where you were sitting near the front of the bleachers.

“hi, captain!” she said enthusiastically. you were puzzled as to why she was talking to you out of the blue after the constant bashes of attitude. she was, what nineteen, the least she could do was act more mature, right? genuinely, you smiled and greeted her before striking a small conversation.

“chanmi! where’s your friend?” you asked and turned to meet her figure. toxically, she smiled and pointed in the direction of her previous seat. you’d been talking for a few minutes when the blow of a whistle stops her mid-sentence. hearing the shouting of the football coach, her pulse accelerated as she saw jeno coming closer and closer. with hopeful eyes, she hears nothing of your next words as she is solely paying attention to lee jeno.

almost movie-like, her vision slows as she drools over the boy who is running to where you two were seated.

“hey monkey!” he cheerily said before sitting to your right to collect his things to put back in his bag. “.... chanmi..”

she dreamily sighed and waved jeno a hi, but her daze came to a stop when she saw him caress your cheek with his hand and sweetly smiling at you. evidently, chanmi had completely focused her attention on jeno as she had stars in her eyes. subconsciously feeling a stare, jeno looked to where chanmi was and of course, she was already looking at him with star struck eyes. but obviously, her gazing made him feel uncomfortable and uneasy. she looked at him like how you looked at him; pure love and ecstasy. he scoffed to himself and grabbed your hand to pull you away from the girl.

“hey, hey! what was that all about,” you whined as he continued to pull you to the parking lot where his car was parked. throwing his bag in the backseat, jeno’s grip was still just as firm, preventing you from climbing into the passenger side. just as you were about to protest again, he turned around, wrapped his arms around your waist and hid his head in your neck, taking in your natural scent while nuzzling his nose against your collarbone. in disarray, you enveloped your arms around jeno’s neck and played with the hairs on the nape of his neck.

“what’s wrong, bub?” you softly said as he then lifted his head from your neck and gently rubbed his nose against yours. he shook his head and continued to hold you in his embrace. but jeno was a horrible liar, and you knew he wasn’t telling the truth.

you both never ended up going to that tutoring session for the community service opportunity. jeno had been consistently whining on how he wanted to just lay in bed with you and rest for the weekend. and you simply couldn’t refuse his cute ass.

before you could do anything else, jeno pushed through the front door of your apartment and made you lay on the couch for him to rest on you. his body stuck like a koala against yours as his head laid on your chest and his arms were once again enclosed around you.

his behavior was off the roof that day and you were perplexed by his actions. something was off with him.

and you were right; something was off with him. na chanmi was jaemin’s distant cousin— maybe third or fourth— but ever since he met na chanmi, which was almost two years prior, she appeared to be utterly in love with jeno, barely even knowing who he was. providentially, he never really saw chanmi around long enough for him to catch feelings for her, but she was always so damn sure she attracted jeno in some type of way.

chanmi had this sense of weary aura around her presence and it always made jeno feel twitchy when it came to her which was why he acted like that.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

it was finally senior year of university. fortunately, after everything you and jeno have been through, your relationship was healthy, and there wasn’t much more you could ask for. you even ended up moving in together in the same apartment during your junior year. everything was going to be perfect.

yeah, that’s what you both thought.

—

“where were you, y/n?” jeno asked right when he heard the front door open.

it was a friday night and you were out with sooyoung and a couple other friends to study and hang out at a local diner. you didn’t text jeno where you were but to be fair, you did try calling him three times before giving up and enjoying lost time with your friends for the night. unluckily for you, jeno had flooded you with nonstop phone calls almost ten minutes after you stopped trying to reach out and tell him what you were doing for the night. time really does fly by.

“i’ve been calling you for the past hour and you haven’t responded to me once. where the hell were you?” you knew he tried to remain calm and mature but you’ve known jeno long enough to know that he was enraged; the glint of anger reflected in his eyes and you knew you were in trouble.

the relationship you’ve had the past couple of months were not the greatest. these were one of the occasions that balls of fire were thrown at each other. accusations and yelling one after another only to make up the next morning.

but something just wasn’t sitting right that night with jeno.

“where were you and who were you with?” he stated again, hands rested on his hips. you sighed, trying to calm down the situation.

“i was with sooyoung and mark tonight.”

“then why didn’t you reply to my calls?” he was really starting to get mad.

“i called you thrice but gave up since you didn’t answer,” you said while walking to your shared bedroom to get ready to shower.

“that doesn’t explain why you didn’t pick up!” he bursted out. and to be honest, you don’t think you’ve seen or heard jeno this mad at you before. something in you just clicked.

you scoffed to yourself and rolled your eyes, “you need to chill! i didn’t do anything wrong, i don’t know why you’re making me the bad guy! we were just hanging out.” but it was too late. jeno was furious, for maybe no reason. or maybe he did have a reason.

though you denied liking mark lee back in middle school and the beginning of high school, jeno was the only person you told about your little crush on the boy. mark lee was the sweetest person ever; caring, thoughtful, and cute. who didn’t have a crush on him?

little did you know, jeno always felt jealous whenever you gushed about the boy. and maybe that was what was going through his mind right now.

but nothing happened, sooyoung and mark were close friends and she offered for you to hang out with them, of course you had to accept their request. you missed them.

however jeno just dashed out of the room, throwing his phone to the ground making the loudest noise. you really fucked up. but you didn’t, jeno was in the wrong, so you tried to convince yourself. but you were too nice to admit that it was entirely his fault. because you still loved him dearly, though the months have been going downhill. you just shook your head and showered.

we’ll be okay in the morning. or so you hoped.

when you got out of the shower, you were wrapped in your towel when you saw jeno sitting on the bed with his head in his hands. he was fuming mad at this point and wanted you to leave.

“you need to leave,” he blatantly said without looking your way. the sound of your bare feet padding the floor stopped. you were speechless. this was the first time he’s kicked you out. but you paid half the rent so you said no.

“it’s not a question, y/n. i need you to get out, we need time off.” you were taken aback by his words. what a dickhead.

“uhm, i don’t know if you’re aware of this but i pay half the rent and half of these damn bills, there’s no way i’m getting out of this house. if anything you should leave…. at least stay in the guest bedroom,” you added. when jeno looked up and finally met your soft brown eyes, the only thing you could see in his was pure anger. it made you hiccup a sob.

staring at him for what seemed like forever, you blink away the tears that accumulated in your eyes and packed everything you could.

“lee jeno you will never be a real man. you’re still the pussy i knew you were,” you dryly laughed and slammed the front door as hard as you could. you stuffed all your shit into your car and called your mom.

“we broke up.”

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

by the time you reached your parents house, you called sooyoung and haechan, informing them about the dramatic scene that happened just moments ago.

you didn’t even know how long but when you reached your parents house it was almost one in the morning. thankfully, your mother was still awake, concerned for her crying child.

knocking on the wood door, it opened immediately and your mother embraced you in her welcoming hug that felt like home.

you weren’t able to sleep that night. thinking about your relationship with lee jeno. from when you two were in diapers to when he stopped being friends with you to getting into the relationship to now. it was all a roller coaster that you did not want to go on anymore.

it was funny, your mother tucked you in your bed that night, telling you to just rest and try your hardest to not think of him.

rising against your bed that following morning, you looked like a train wreck. puffy eyes, swollen face, chapped lips. and it’s about at nine in the morning when you get a facetime call. deep inside you wished it was jeno apologising to you but it was just hyuck and jaem.

looking at you, the boys show so much sympathy and sadness through their faces, having almost similar expressions.

“y/n, we’ll pick you up today then, yeah? we can go in jaemin’s car and we’ll pick up sooyoung and mark too, okay?” says donghyuck once he heard a sob escape your lips. you nod, nonetheless, ending the phone call and getting ready to look presentable to the public.

—

luckily for you, the two boys pick up the rest of your things from jeno’s before coming to get you and the rest of their friends.

they help you put your things away in your room and hug you with so much love. in that moment, you were have to have friends like them.

“let’s go get sooyoung and mark. i wanna go to the amusement park.” they obliged to your request and the three of you walked out of your house after bidding your parents goodbye. everyone in your family was concerned about your well-being but you said you were fine and going to heal yourself with your friends.

when mark and sooyoung are in the car, the pair immediately hug you as tight as they could while sooyoung cursed at lee jeno for breaking your heart once more.

“i swear i will kick his ass. i don’t care how strong he is, bitch i will kick his ass all the way to fucking jupiter,” you laughed at sooyoung, she seemed more upset at your breakup than you were. but everyone laughed and agreed that they would all tag team and best jeno’s ass so hard that he can’t even remember your name.

the day was spent better than you had thought, you five stayed on the bay walk until dusk. then you went out to get some korean barbecue and ice cream, all their treats to make you feel better about yourself.

your friends and family really helped you get over your relationship with jeno. however, of course your mothers continued to talk and gossip about your relationship.

“they’re really doing this again? jeno didn’t even tell me yet. i’ll make sure he gets his ass beat by both me and minjung,” his mother says while on speaker, courtesy of your mother cleaning the dishes in the kitchen. she hummed and spotted you hiding behind the wall. you’d been listening to their conversation the second your mother called out mrs. lee’s name.

noticing your mother stare, you whined at her, “mom can you at least be a little more discreet when you’re talking about us?”

“we just wanted to catch up. you know, mrs. lee hasn’t seen jeno since your breakup— didn’t even know you two broke up.” you pursed your lips into a straight line before sitting on a stool. “don’t you think you guys will ever make up again? it’s happened once after constant pushing.”

you scoffed and rolled your eyes, taking a bit out of an apple from the fruit bowl.

“he’s a jerk, mom. it’s complicated.”

but just then, you heard jeno’s baritone voice through the speaker of your mothers phone.

“she’s fake, mom. it’s complicated—” but before you could hear anything else the jackass had to say, you mother hung up.

you sighed out of annoyance and walked to jangmi’s room. she was supposed to start her new job today.

“jangmi, are you ready? i need to work soon too,” you shouted through her door while listening to her rummaging through her room before opening the door.

“yeah i’m ready. let’s go,” she took your hand and dragged you down the stairs. saying bye to your mother she slipped on her shoes and walked out the doors, waiting by the passenger side of your car.

jangmi got a job at some aesthetically pleasing library in town and she was excited to get the job.

you stopped and parked the car before she opened the car door. however you stopped her before she could even set one foot out.

at this point, you and jeno had been broken up for three months. but seeing jeno with chanmi— who is laughing and hitting his arm playfully— your heart breaks more, albeit holding jangmi’s arm a little too tightly. once she looked in the direction of your face, she immediately knew you had a reason.

“y/n, you’re hurting me,” her voice snapped you out of the trance you were in and you apologized and asked her if jeno and chanmi go into the library. it seemed like they were going inside. she shot an ‘okay’ sign and finally got out of the car.

if jeno was being honest, he got over your break up fairly quickly and got back into the dating jazz almost two months after. well, more like he got heavily intoxicated with alcohol and had a one night stand with chanmi. he didn’t know how or why, neither does he know now.

you drove away to an empty parking lot and frantically fish out your phone in your pocket to dial jaemin.

“nana… is chanmi and jeno, like… a thing?” jaemin found out that they were seeing each other— whether romantically or not— about two weeks prior, but he didn’t have the heart to break it to you.

the boy sighed through the phone and admitted that they have been seeing each other for about a month and a half now. but he made sure to quickly say that he just found out and didn’t know how to break the news to you. because as fine as you claimed you were, jaemin knows you more than anything, and he knows you’re still affected.

“it’s okay jaem. we can see other people, it’ll be fine,” you reassured him as you heard the worry in his voice. but even through your voice, he knew you still weren’t okay, so he drove to your house after you ended the call.

you just wanted to sit alone in your bedroom binging horrifically bad tv shows while eating to your heart's content.

but a knock on your door prevented you from doing anything you planned for the rest of spring vacation. because those thoughts filled you through the three months prior.

it was your four bestest friends, and you would trade anything to be with them; even jeno.

they didn’t end up leaving until three in the morning. making sure you were fine and didn’t have a worry about lee jeno. and it helped, for the most part.

—

when returning to campus, you immediately sensed jeno and directed your gaze to something else. however, jeno had a few things up his sleeve and wrapped his large hand around your wrist. you struggled for a moment and threatened to shout out ‘stranger danger’ though it was more immature than you thought it was so you opted to not say anything.

he roughly pushed you against a hidden wall and shoved his face in the junction of your neck and shoulders. tears.

this might’ve been your second or third time watching, experiencing jeno cry actual tears. whether in sadness or frustration. you tried to pry him off of you.

“jen, i have class. what are you doing?” you struggled in his strong grip around your waist. jeno was crying up a storm but was still glad to hear a nickname of his come out of your mouth.

after moments of seeming hours, the man slowly lifted his head from your now wet neck. you stared in his eyes and you never saw the look of pure pain in his eyes. slowly, jeno rubbed his strong nose against yours, leaning your foreheads against each other. he then released his secure grip from your torso and gently cupped your face, his fingers ever-so-softly wiping the tears you didn’t even know escaped your eyes.

that moment was all a blur and neither of you attended your classes that day.

now here you were, sitting across him, across the island that stood in the middle of the kitchen. the apartment still looked the same as when you left, besides the unclean dishes piling in the sink and crooked frames. from that previous scene to now, not a single chirp leaves your mouths. it was dead silent. until he rubs his tired face, jeno is the first to speak up.

“monkey… bubba,” he started, unable to look at you in your eyes, scared to look at your reaction as he planned out his next words carefully. but at this point you figured you knew what he was going to say. because like you said before, jeno is not a man. though he may look and feel like one, he never will be if he keeps up his immature behavior. mentally, lee jeno is not a man, at least not in your eyes. and maybe he never will be, but you’re one to know.

your eyes were emotionless and cold as you looked at his bowed head. the intensity of the room was rising by the minute as he paused on his words.

it seems as though now, jeno is broken. as broken as you were when you broke up. it’s what he deserves. you don’t feel a thing as he continued to shed his tears quietly. but one look and it’s done for.

you don’t know when and you don’t know how, but you ended up on the couch with his puffy face lying on your chest. hesitantly, the pads of your fingers traced his sculpted face as he rests after his crying session.

but why were you doing this? he’s a jackass

hm, he may be a complete asshat but he’s still your best friend over everything. so you push aside all your thoughts and only think about your middle school relationship.

‘true friends are never apart. maybe in distance but never in heart.’

you don’t know whether it’s your best friend jeno calling you or your boyfriend jeno calling you, but you hope it was best friend jeno. because it was a way simpler time then and he was always there when you needed him most.

carefully, you lifted your body and looked at the blaring red digital clock sitting on the desk. it was seven in the evening and you had to return home. well, pick up your car from the parking lot and then go home.

feeling you moving, jeno held you closer, squishing his cheek against your décolletage. as much as you did not want to see him, jeno was still as cute as ever. if he wanted to try again, maybe you’d consider.

to hell, you are not going to consider it. you need to go home.

“jen… jen…” you whispered, shaking his body as he maneuvered his head so his nose is tickling your neck. you actually debated on slapping the shit out of him to wake him up. it’s what he deserves. so you do. not too hard but enough to wake him up and hold his left cheek.

“ow!” he whined and rubbed his eyes. what a child.

“jen i need to go home.” only causing him to pout and holding you close to refuse you to leave.

“we’re done, jen. i need to go, i have stuff to do. plus we missed class today.” he whined even more.

“stay with me. we’ll go to class tomorrow,” he mumbled through your neck. but now you were starting to get aggravated.

“lee jeno. this is absurd! you want to constantly make accusations of me cheating with mark, break up with me, and now you want me to stay? all this in four and a half months? you must be out of your goddamn mind. there’s no way in hell i’m going to stay here tonight. we can be friends, yeah, because we’ve known each other our entire lives. but if you think i’m going to get back with you, especially now, you’re fucking crazy,” you breached with tears of frustration in your eyes, “plus i thought you and chanmi were a thing. i saw you two a few weeks ago when i dropped off jangmi at work.”

but the man— or boy— stayed silent. the only noise of the passing cars filling it. tension was high as jeno looked at you with the most lost puppy eyes. but he agreed with you in his mind, he was a little immature. okay, he had to admit that he was very immature, and still is. maybe he just doesn’t know how to work relationships.

no more than three moments later he opened his mouth, only for you to talk again. but in a more calmed voice, “listen, just take me home. i don’t wanna be here right now.” you felt suffocated by the apartment you used to call home. you felt suffocated by the person, you used to call home. but right now you couldn’t make up complete thoughts. it was too overbearing and all you wanted to do was shower and sleep.

without a word, jeno rubbed his eyes and picked up his keys, signaling you to go outside. you released your temper and walked out a minute after he did and got into his car. it was his fault he would not let you go.

he dropped you off with zero words spoken on the twelve minute drive to your parents house. quickly, you muttered a ‘thank you’ and dashed out of his car and to your front door, breathing out whatever breath you were holding.

jeno made sure to leave once he knew you were inside safe. and once you opened the door, questions bombarded you.

‘where were you?’

‘who was that?’

‘why are you home so late?’

but you just shook your head and told your family that you were tired and wanted to shower and rest. leaving you alone was the least they could do.

the hot water was hitting your skin as you stood there, thinking about him. what was going on with him? why is he acting like that all of a sudden? you don’t know. but all you knew was that you needed some time away. to think and to compose yourself.

—

your dad dropped you off at university that morning. the questions that were unanswered that previous night were still left hanging from his mouth. yet you still didn’t answer the questions, you couldn’t.

thanking and saying goodbye to your dad, you got out of his car to walk into yours to mentally prepare yourself for the day. there was still about thirty minutes before your first class and you wanted to use that time to think about possible scenarios that could happen. you just hoped they don’t ever happen.

continuously, you rubbed your face as you fidgeted in your seat and stared out onto campus. taking deep breaths, you finally walked out of the car and made sure to lock it. walking to the literature building, you spotted jeno with a couple of his football friends on the courtyard. and before you met contact, you whipped your head into the direction of the literature building.

jeno sighed to himself and knew he fucked up. big time.

instead of going up to you, he thought to himself that he should leave you alone. he was being bipolar and he didn’t want to overwhelm you and your feelings even more. as much as he was suffering alone, he would stay away from you, but observe you carefully.

you actually had a volleyball game later that day— the last game of the season— and chanmi had asked him if she would watch her. without hesitating, jeno agreed to come but mostly just to see you, but he’d obviously keep that to himself. so once your classes were over, you walked to the gymnasium and into the girls locker room to change. by the time you exited the locker room, people filled the side bleachers and watched the girls (both from your team and the opponents) practice bumping the ball to each other. the opposing team was on the opposite side of the gym to practice while you were on the other. unluckily, your team was practicing on the opening side of the gymnasium and that was when you caught a glimpse of jeno. you looked at him for a brief moment and almost missed a teammates bump when chanmi had run up to greet the guy.

some of his football teammates were actually already sitting on the front of the bleachers and admiring the girls that were hitting the ball with their spandex shorts. jeno hugged chanmi because even when he said they weren’t close, they had gotten closer over the five months after your breakup. but your attention was then reverted to your friends. jaemin, hyuck, mark, and sooyoung had come to cheer on your team for moral support. since jeno wasn’t there to be by your side anymore.

“y/n, you can do this. we know you can! and even if you guys don’t end up making it, this is all for fun and we’ll treat you out for ice cream tonight. all on us. good luck!”

soon the referee blew the whistle indicating the five minute mark. there were five minutes before the final game of the season, and the final game of volleyball you’d ever play for your university. the last game was a home game so you were the first to actually serve the ball. as close as it was, the ball was bumped by a girl of the away team and the game actually started.

time was ticking, and there were only ten minutes left before halftime and the third set of the game. so far, your team was up by eight points. six. four. the bell of halftime filled the gym as the girls on each of the teams walked to their respective sides to have a team talk and rest.

“come on ladies, this is the last game. we’re ahead by four points. we can make it through the last set and win this tournament. it’s the last game of the season, good luck!” encouraged your coach as the rest of the girls discussed who was going to the field first.

“y/n, lia, chanmi, kana, areum, and sohee— you girls are up first. y/n is serving again.”

so far, your team had one the first two sets, and the pressure was up for the last set. you needed to win this. you did not care if this was for a hobby of yours. some of those girls were not so nice while you walked to the gym, giving you the side eye. you just felt like you had to win this game. not for your teammates nor for your friends. not even for jeno. but more for yourself and your pride.

three minutes were on the clock and they were up by two points and you just needed to get at least four points ahead to win the game. you never faltered your serves that set, no one else served besides you and when it was time to switch members, your coach always needed you in. you were bouncing the ball on the floor, getting ready to serve as best as you could. throwing the ball in the air, you swung your arms and for sure, the ball was hit over the net. game start.

the whistle was blown, two points given to your team. the scores were tied now and all you needed to do was gain at least two more points to win. the ball dribbled on the floor in front of you and you then served the ball, hitting it with all the strategies you accumulated throughout the years. the girls immediately missed the ball and the score was down to you again. there were now forty seconds left, as you served the ball again and the girls missed the ball. the pressure was all on them and they couldn’t get over the fact that they were losing.

“we won!” screamed your teammates as you rested yourself on your knees, taking deep breaths. your four friends ran up to you worried and helped you sit down to rest.

“y/n, you were working yourself too much during the last game. why did you not go back? you could’ve watched,” said sooyoung while she was rubbing your back. jaemin was giving you water and rubbing the sides of your arm while mark was massaging your shoulder and hyuck was sitting by your legs.

“take it easy for now. you bid the opposite team good game,” hyuck rubbed your thigh. you sighed and got out of the seat you were in to meet up with your teammates. you all stand in a line and high-fived the opposing team before you got your bag and sat back down with your friends.

“let’s go get ice cream now,” you tiredly said and slumped the strap over your shoulder.

“uhm, before we go… i dropped off chanmi here so she might need to go with us,” jaemin scratched the nape of his neck. you all shook your heads in a ‘no problem’ and he walked up to his cousin to tell her his plans for the rest of the day.

“oh it’s okay jaem. i was going to ride with jeno, is it okay if we came along?” she asked while looking behind her to see his muscular figure talking to a few of his friends. jaemin kept his composure, though, and did the mature thing. he just accepted her request and walked back to his group of friends to tell them about the situation.

when he did, all eyes were on you with worry in your eyes. by this time, you were feeling a lot better than what you were feeling before and laughed at them.

“guys, i’ll be fine. we’re not together anymore, he can do whatever he wants.” though deep inside, you were really going to shit your pants because of the circumstances that happened the day prior. but it was better for them not to know, at least not yet.

in your car seated sooyoung and hyuck. you were on your way to a regular ice cream parlor which a friend worked at.

“renjun!” shouted you, jaemin and hyuck. renjun worked at this ice cream parlor for a while, you got to know him by coming here on the regular, especially during nights when you were stressed over exams or when you and jeno were having problems. therefore the guy was actually a pretty good friend of yours. renjun was a transferee at hyuck and jaemin’s university, they got to know each other then. they developed a pretty good relationship with each other too, you could tell with the way they conversed with each other.

you were laughing and joking around with renjun and your shared friends as you sat on the matching chairs of the countertop. the red reflecting in jeno’s eyes as he watched you joke with your friends and completely ignoring him and chanmi who were seated at a booth not far from where the group was. but he decided to keep quiet and try to pay attention to chanmi, she was just trying to have a good time and he didn’t blame her. but he just couldn’t help but to keep looking back at his old group of friends that all got along so well.

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

it was now the last football game of the season; thursday 6 p.m. jaemin and hyuck had begged you to go after you constantly refusing and excusing that you had ‘fuckton of homework.’ they both came to your house and rang the doorbell anyways, forcing you to get ready and dragging you to the car.

“come on, jeno still talks about you. The both of you are still friends, no?” questioned jaemin. it took you a while to answer him but you guessed that was what you could call yours and jeno’s relationship as of now.

the three of you arrived on the field and sat on the bleachers right above jeno’s team. just fucking great, you rolled your eyes and mentally punched both jaemin and hyuck where they did not want to be punched. with burning eyes, you glared at your friends and wished to get away from that situation. you sat fidgeting on the metal seats and looked down. there were still a few minutes before the big game and you saw chanmi hug jeno before kissing his cheek and wishing him good luck. the boys then looked to you— who was sitting in between them— and asked if you were okay.

“i’m definitely okay. i’m so okay… listen, i don’t know why you guys are so caught up between jneo and i. it’s our relationship and if he moved on then good for him,” the sarcasm was dripping from your voice. but they picked up on the bitter tone that dripped out of your lips.

you focused back on the field. and you don’t know whether it was the chilly wind or your feelings overcoming you, but there were tears in your eyes almost the entire game. not a word was spoken between the three of you. the boys were still friends with jeno so you broke the silence and excused yourself to go to the bathroom. however in the hall, stood jeno with his hands covering his face.

you were his best friend over everything so of course he noticed you were there. he was happy you ended up going after the begs of hyuck and jaemin, after begging his friends to ask you.

“hi, jen,” your soft voice interrupted his lonely session. he smiled at you and greeted you as well.

“so, uhm, how’ve you been? it’s kinda been a while, yeah?” you asked, initiating the conversation. his eyes are lit up, “i’ve been good, you? and yeah it has been a while, i hope you’re doing okay.” the conversation was more civil than you thought it would be, but it wasn’t bad, of course. better than what you imagined your next conversation would be.

“minjung’s been wondering what you’ve been up to. she misses you tons.” you laughed and thought about his beloved older sister. “jangmi misses you too. so does my dad.” the atmosphere was awkwardly quiet for a moment before you heard the whistle from the ref. you then patted his shoulder and wished him good luck before actually going to the bathroom.

your university football team won that night. and you were immensely proud of jeno. he truly was blooming into a man, especially after the conversation the two of you had. he was growing as a person, and you were happy he was. you’ve known him all his life, you knew he was changing, and for the better.

—

“true friends are never apart. maybe in distance but never in heart,” the two of you recited while looking through memory books from who knows how long. you almost lost your best friend because of stupid feelings, but you both learned and grew from them. it was all for the better and you are both glad to still be best friends.

“jeno’s just a friend, mom. it’s simple.”

“y/n’s just a friend mom. it’s simple.”

“we’re best friends. nothing more, nothing less.”