#and anyone else with a reason to not understand something

[valenteal]

Wow thanks for the quick response! Jeez you’re a fast typer! I’ve been going through your blog, you’re one of the few well informed people I’ve found on this site with actually researched and comprehensive arguments!

Honestly I’m not saying anything about being trans, and I genuinely had no knowledge about the previous studies. This isn’t a topic I actively engage with because it gets so heated and toxic and hateful. But I do think it’s interesting that from my perspective, as a person who has had multiple trans friends and is nonbinary myself, that I too was unaware of existing research (to be clear the past tense has nothing to do with them being trans, just my personal issues that caused me to ghost everyone I ever knew except my family). And I think it potentially says a lot about other people who also oppose hormone treatments based on medical concerns. Like me, there are probably a lot of people who just genuinely aren’t informed and are worried.

And it’s not that I think trans kids can’t make their own choices on these things, one of my best friends in grade school transitioned in second grade, and he definitely knew what he needed and made the right choice for himself. It’s about the medical side, the side where doctors were using treatments not designed, studied, or authorized for use in that manner that scared me. I’m not a huge fan of drugs or modern medicine despite relying heavily on it for my mental health. I have good reason not to trust American healthcare, from the corruption to the sexual abuse to the incompetence and underfunding and over booked appointments, it’s a lot. I rely on medications and drugs, I’m aware of how much they’ve helped me, but it’s still a struggle to trust foreign substances that alter my body and mind in ways that no one actually understands. Due to both knowledge of the many ways it can go wrong and the way new drugs are developed (throw random compounds and see what sticks). Not to mention the incredibly cult like mindset that the trans community on the internet has developed. I’m not saying being trans is a cult or that trans people are evil and corrupting, but I do think that being trans has been made into something “cool” that kids want to emulate not because they are trans but because they want to be part of that community. And people tend to get overly defensive and insular when they’re being persecuted so I get the defensiveness. I just think it’s turned into a black and white us vs. them mentality that is not productive or helpful to anyone.

I’m getting off point here, I just meant that I don’t trust medicine or the people making it. Drug companies are already doing their best to sell us harmful substances that we don’t need, and some verification that it both works and isn’t harmful is a huge relief.

And my concerns about menopause are just basic things that my mom and aunts complain about. The sometimes months or years of imbalanced hormones that cause mental or emotional turmoil, decreased bone density leading to more severe injuries, that kind of thing. Hormones are what run our bodies more than anything else, they signal growth and mood and such. They’re temperamental, as anyone with severe pms will tell you. Not to mention chemical imbalances are a big cause of mental illness. There’s just so much we don’t know about our bodies. I’m repeating myself now, I’ll stop lol

Two years after being tasked with commissioning a review of medical evidence surrounding gender-affirming care for trans youth, Utah’s own state health department has concluded that trans healthcare bans “cannot be justified.” The Republicans who commissioned the study aren’t too happy about it.

Back in 2023, Utah Governor Spencer Cox signed a bill that placed an indefinite “moratorium” on doctors prescribing gender-affirming care like hormone therapy and puberty blockers to trans youth. That bill ordered the Utah Department of Health and Human Services to compile their report in order to produce recommendations for the state government on whether or not to lift the moratorium.

This week, the department delivered their long-awaited, over 1,000-page report — which is dated August 6, 2024 — to Utah lawmakers. The report’s authors found that “the consensus of the evidence supports that the treatments are effective in terms of mental health, psychosocial outcomes, and the induction of body changes consistent with the affirmed gender in pediatric GD [gender dysphoria] patients.”

The authors added that “the evidence also supports that the treatments are safe in terms of changes to bone density, cardiovascular risk factors, metabolic changes, and cancer.” Trans youth who had received gender-affirming care were within the bounds of normal, non-pathological ranges for these conditions.

y’all this is huge. please don’t “water is wet” all over it! I understand that we all already know this… The point is that the world doesn’t know or care or believe and so these studies really fucking matter!

[pastabaguette]

okay guys. here’s a little humanstuck writing i did today accompanied by a sketch because it feels weird posting with no art:

     That kid never sits with anybody, Naipunya’s thinking. What’s his deal? 

     She’s carrying her big plastic lunch tray out of the kitchen, which bears today’s lunch, spaghetti and meatballs. Soggy and crumbly and they never taste good. There’s a carton of 2% skim milk on the side, and some baby carrots, similarly soggy and tasteless. They’re stale, too, and dry. How can something be dry and soggy at the same time? They’re making everyone take a vegetable with their lunch, for nutrition. Nobody eats it though, so it’s a waste of food. It’s such a waste of food, so why do they do that? Naipunya doesn’t understand it. 

     She stands in the cafeteria noise outside the kitchen with her tray, pondering this dilemma, and thinking about where to sit today. She’s still watching that kid. His hair is straight and brown and long. He kind of looks like a girl if you look at him from the back, she thinks. That kid never gets the school lunch. He brings a big metal lunchbox instead. He’s sitting at his usual table today. Nobody else is sitting there. He doesn’t talk to anyone. 

     He’s unpacking his lunch, presently focused solely on the big box. First he unfolds a big white napkin, which had neatly enveloped a round white plate. The napkin is placed, slightly crumpled and askew, and the plate goes on top. With the boy having cleared the plate, the rest of the lunchbox’s contents below are now freed. From where Naipunya’s standing, it’s hard to see exactly what else is inside. 

     She’s deciding now whether or not she’s going to sit with him today. She doesn’t particularly have anywhere else to be, but maybe he’s alone for a reason. Maybe he’s mean. But maybe no one sits with him because he doesn’t have any friends. Naipunya decides she’ll move closer to his table to get a better look. 

     He’s pulling out a sizable glass bottle of milk now, which had lain aside two other wrapped things. His posture straightens slightly as he handles it, and he eagerly uncaps the bottle in anticipation. He grips the bottle with both hands and, raising it to his mouth, drinks it down voraciously. She watches him drink for several seconds, swallowing each gulp with increasing intensity. Finally, he slams the glass back down, having drunk almost the whole bottle in one long swig. The glass makes a loud CLUNK against the cafeteria table. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, not bothering to recap the bottle. 

     Closer, she can see him clearer now. His dark hair contrasts sharply with his pale face. Besides the hair that falls down his back about his shoulderblades, choppy bangs cover the sides of his forehead. The sides, but not the middle, because he’s got a cowlick on the top of his head which pushes them away like some sort of curtain. Now he’s taking the bigger of the two wrapped things out of his box, a sandwich with lettuce, and putting it on his plate. His hair makes him look like a horse. 

     “Your hair makes you look like a horse.” she tells him, standing over his table now.

     The horse boy startles slightly at the sound —evidently he hadn’t noticed her approach in all the room’s noise—  but regains his composure quickly, turning to look in her direction. His eyes are blueish grey. His face has brightened a bit; his previous seriousness now replaced with something almost like a smile. 

     “Yes,” he says, pausing before he continues, “Thank you.” 

     Naipunya beams. 

i haven’t really done any creative writing like this in about six years, i think. i’m kind of nervous sharing it because of that. please don’t be super mean in the comments.

[goomyloid]

im the kris costume anon (that is... a description, alright self jklfhdfkjas) and i just had to jump up and down at what you said at the end about kris protecting noelle!!!!

because gosh did it do things to my brain when noelle said 'then kris, maybe you can take your sword and be the hero that protects me from the mice?' like... hmmmm noelle?? HMM???? i say as i fuck up the puzzle and scare her endlessly with mice anyway but--

gosh i love that yeah, kris as a knight as opposed to baggy clothes gremlin must've been so confusing for noelle! also they just naturally know all these aura farming ass poses, are agile as hell, and things that make them *look cool*?! i love that kris is still shorter than her though shdjsdhjs

i also wholly subscribe to the idea that kris is trying to protect noelle by distancing themself from her (or something) so it is Doing Things to my Brain to consider what noelle must've been thinking to see them as a knight

agljkghkhkfjas oh my god, i had a similar thought during the weird route of 'haha it's like kris is the knight protecting their mage ha a h a...' before tucking that away deep in my mind, because i thought i'd get flayed for it so it felt like someone dumped cold water on my head when i read what you said LMAOOOOO bless...!

I will say the things ur afraid of getting flayed for… theure gonna flay me instead… get behind me big goomyloid will protect you

axwgdhecqcshf i can imagine that noelle has never really thought of kris as being very “cool”… MAYBE when they were playing the piano she would think so? but “cool” probably isnt the right word (maybe earnest instead) and its definitely not the same as how they appear in the DW lol… suddenly bro is swordfighting and whatever else and noelle is just ?!?!?!?!??! (hand over mouth) Why are they kinda… i didnt know they could…

IT MAKES ME GIGGLE even though normal route kriselle is much more lowkey i think its a cool tidbit… who knows maybe seeing that different side of them will awaken something in her………. but in reality theyll always be a little penguin

also — i laugh when i see people draw kris taller than noelle tbh… this is proof that we fundamentally view the characters differently. sorry. kris always must be significantly shorter sorry

also yeah i definitely think that out of all people kris wants to protect by Keeping Them Out Of It it’s probably noelle. susie is way different, because not only is she super strong in character and blatantly disobeys Us all the time, but at this point shes kind of irreversibly deeply intertwined with whatever the hell is happening story-wise. i said it somewhere in a twitter thread but if kris is going to want anyone to understand their position, it’d probably be susie. conversely, kris is driven away from noelle for all sorts of reasons, one of which is probably guilt over Various Things (them possibly having something to do with dess’s disappearance, or the fact that theyre Working For Dess Now or something, or just general low self esteem and feeling as though they’d be weighing her down by staying in her life). they miss her but they feel like they dont have the right to, so they keep pushing themself away and clinging onto susie as a result (this isnt discrediting the krusie friendship or anything but rather one of many reasons that kris seems so attached to her)

cold silent knight there to protect noelle… little did kris know that this protection would lead them into getting closer to her again.. PLAN BACKFIRE epic fail loser!!!! i think about how before kris cut her off in the couch scene, noelle was probably going to say that kris said they would protect her (since she reiterates it later) and i just go Oughhhh. Aauuuugghhhh. if i could redo my little comic interpretation of the porch scene id add that in there because i Forgot

reminds me of this doodle i did (for angel/demon au) where kris’s silent protectiveness gets completely trashed as they are the one forced to hurt her……. forced to hurt the friend you promised to protect… you TOLD her youd protect her…. she is harmed and then as punishment you feel as though you must harm yourself. hey does anyone else see that 18-wheeler coming down this lane or is it just m

[cchrysallis]

You don't understand how terrifying Toby E. Rogers is.

Tim Wright? I've seen him being called Slenderman's right hand more times than I can count. Brian too — always listed as the tactical one, the logical one, the camera in the dark. Both strong. Skilled. Ruthless. But Tobias?

You don't talk about Tobias.

No one ever does.

Maybe that’s the most terrifying part.

Tim is frightening. He's tall, trained, deadly accurate with a firearm. If you're unlucky, he might shoot you in the leg just to watch you crawl and sit there beside your dying body, lighting a cigarette with hands still stained from his last kill, staring at you like you're a problem that refuses to go away. He doesn’t enjoy it. He’s just tired.

Brian? He’ll mock you. Record your cries, laugh at them later. He’ll put a bullet in every inch of you until you’re crawling, desperate, broken. And when he’s done, he’ll casually meet Tim for a drink, chatting about ammo like you weren’t even a person. He doesn’t need a reason. He’s cruel for the sake of it. Detached. Emotionless. He'll shoot every inch of you until you're no longer human — just something twitching on the floor.

But they feel pain. They tire. You can fight them, hurt them, stall them — they can still feel that bullet stinging on their skin, they can still feel blood dripping out from their shoulder, they can still feel your punch on their stomach for hours.

But Tobias?

Tobias is something else entirely.

Toby doesn’t feel pain.

Let me say that again: he doesn’t feel pain.

You can stab him, shoot him, snap bones — he won’t flinch. He won’t stop. You won’t even slow him down. Heat exhaustion doesn’t touch him. Pain doesn’t register. He's wired differently. Completely.

He’s spent years throwing axes. His aim is terrifying — eagle-precise, deadly. You think your weak arms and ragged breath will help you escape him? you’re trembling, you’re gasping, lungs burning, legs cramping, hands slippery with your own blood. And he's still walking — not running — walking after you, laughing, muttering nonsense between vocal tics as the blade in his hand scrapes along the wall behind him.

This man laughs, twitches, and stutters his way through an entire bloodbath without blinking.

You think shooting him will stop him? you think pleading will slow him down? you think crawling to the door will earn his pity?

You’ll only hear: "li-little buh-biitch" — before his axe swings down, smiling down at you, like a hunter who just killed his first prey, his first prize.

And even then, he won't finish you. Not right away. He'll throw an axe into your back, then rip it out slowly. He wants you to feel it. He'll let you crawl a little. He likes the chase.

He'll follow you, limping with purpose, murmuring through his ticks. He’ll scrape his axe along the ground, letting you hear the metal sing behind you. The floor becomes a canvas for the trail of red he leaves behind.

Toby isn't a saint. He's not a sunshine-and-rainbows proxy. He wasn’t born for this — he was twisted into it. He was never meant to be saved. Not when he was forced to become a proxy to survive.

He won’t soften for anyone.

He won’t declaw himself for you.

He won’t stop sharpening his teeth just to make sure he can still tear something apart.

He enjoys watching blood drain from your body. He smiles when you scream. He stares with fascination when you cry — not out of pleasure, but out of curiosity.

Because he’s never felt it. So he wants to see it.

So tell me: if you were Slenderman, and you had to choose between Brian, Tim, or Toby.

Who would you trust to be your hands?

Your eyes?

Your wrath?

....

You already know the answer now.

[yaoi-enthusiasts]

PTSD || s. ryomen - side story

❛ ❜ sukuna ryomen x f!reader || modern au

❝Growing up with the pink haired boy, it was no surprise when he put a ring on your finger when you both turned eighteen. The young man Sukuna Ryomen Itadori knew your dark life at home with your family, desperately trying to take you away. Until he is sentenced to 10 years of prison for keeping true to his vows… “I promise you with all of my being, I will protect you in anyway I have to, til the day I die.” And protects you he does…❞

cw ; mdni • 18+ only. contains explicit sexual themes and content. use of alcohol/weed. hurt/trauma. family trauma. consent/non consent. smut . anxiety. death.

main masterlist | series masterlist

“Hi, my sweet girl,” you smiled softly, kneeling to greet your three-year-old daughter as she came toddling down the hallway in nothing but a grin. You were in the middle of potty training, which meant these naked streaks through the house weren’t exactly rare—but today, something in your chest squeezed tighter than usual. “Mama!” she squealed, stripping fully and sprinting past you, arms flailing like tiny wings. You laughed at first, reaching for the towel draped over the back of the couch, but your smile faltered. Your stomach turned. That familiar lump formed in your throat. And without thinking, your voice came sharp—too sharp.

“Sukuna, turn around!” you snapped, hurriedly wrapping your daughter’s tiny body in the towel. Sukuna, who had been walking into the living room behind you, froze in place and turned his back without protest. “Is everything okay?” he asked gently, his tone a careful blend of concern and confusion. “Don’t—don’t look,” you stammered, your voice cracking as you shielded your daughter. “She’s not dressed.” You clutched the towel tighter around her, the words burning your throat. Tears brimmed without permission, your heart hammering in your chest as memories flashed—sharp and brutal—in the back of your mind.

You didn’t look back at him. You couldn’t.

In another room, you sat her down and helped her into a clean pair of pajamas, smoothing the soft fabric over her small limbs with trembling hands. “My sweet girl… you can’t run around without clothes, okay?” you whispered, pulling her close against your chest.“Why, Mama?” she asked, peeking up at you with big, curious eyes. Her voice was innocent, unburdened. She didn’t understand the world could be cruel. You swallowed, brushing your fingers through her hair. “Because there are bad people out there. People who hurt little girls. And Mama and Papa want to protect you. You understand, right?” She nodded a little, clinging tighter, but then she frowned and pulled back just enough to cross her arms defiantly. “Papa not bad,” she said, her voice firm in the way only toddlers could manage. “Papa is not bad. Papa is good.” And just like that, your face crumpled with shame.

She was right.

You’d never seen Sukuna as anything but gentle with her. He never once gave you reason to fear—not even in the early days, not even after prison. He was patient, present, and soft with her in a way he never was with anyone else. But still, your trauma lived in the corners of your mind, slipping out uninvited. It was unintentional—but tonight, you’d let it spill onto both of them. “Let’s read a bedtime story,” you murmured, trying to make your voice light again as you tucked her into bed. “No!” she suddenly cried, shaking her head. “Papa read story too! With Mama!” The blush that hit your cheeks was molten-hot. You blinked down at her, her little fists balled up in protest. She loved her father. And in your panic… you had made her feel like maybe she wasn’t supposed to.

You stood up, swallowing your pride and walking quietly into the living room. Sukuna was sitting on the couch, scrolling on his phone like nothing had happened. He looked up when you entered, his brows slightly raised in question. “Hey, Suku,” you said gently, your voice barely above a whisper. “Yeah, hon?” he asked, setting the phone aside. “Do you… Do you want to read a bedtime story with us?” There was no hesitation. “Of course,” he said, standing immediately and walking over to you. He leaned in and kissed your forehead like it was the easiest thing in the world. Like you hadn’t just flinched earlier. Like his heart didn’t carry bruises too.

Later that night, once your daughter was sound asleep and the book was closed on her pillow, you both retreated to your room. The silence between you stretched. “We need to talk,” Sukuna said softly as the door clicked shut behind you. “I know,” you whispered, curling your arms around yourself. “I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have reacted like that. I know you’d never hurt her. I just… I saw him. I saw him in my mind, and—” You broke off, burying your face in your hands as the sobs started to rise. He crossed the room without a word and gently pulled your hands away. In one swift, effortless movement, he picked you up and wrapped your legs around his waist, carrying you to the edge of the bed. You melted against his chest, your face in the crook of his neck.

“I’d never hurt our baby girl,” he said softly, his voice low and raw. “I know,” you breathed, but he tilted your chin up. “Do you?” he asked again, his eyes boring into yours—not accusing, but needing to know. You blinked hard, new tears spilling. “I do. I do, Suku. I just… I got scared. I saw him, and I couldn’t stop it. But I know you’re good. I know you’re a good dad.” He exhaled slowly, kissing your temple. “I just want to be part of it. I want the baths, the diapers, the stories… I want it all. But sometimes, I feel like I’m watching her grow up through glass.” You clutched his shirt, guilt thick in your throat. Even now, he wasn’t mad. He just wanted in. “How about this,” he offered gently, brushing a thumb down your cheek, “Tomorrow, you give her a bath, and I dress her. You can be in the room. Hell, you can narrate every step.” You let out a breathy laugh through your tears, pressing your forehead against his. “Okay. We can do that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you said again, holding him tighter. “I’m sorry, Suku.”

“I know,” he murmured, kissing your shoulder. “We’re gonna figure it out. You and me.” And with your legs still around his waist and his arms tight around your back, you believed him. You really did.

The next day was soft and sunny—the kind of warmth that coaxed smiles even from grumpy hearts. You, Sukuna, and your daughter spent the morning at the park, the afternoon sharing sticky snow cones, and the evening tucked into the back row of a movie theater watching some odd new animated film your daughter had been talking about all week. You glanced over halfway through. Sukuna was out cold, arms crossed, head tilted back just slightly, snoring softly.

You smiled to yourself. This was why you always picked the back row—so he could sneak naps during movies like this. But he never complained. For his little girl, Sukuna would sit through the worst plots, the loudest songs, and the brightest, most chaotic animations, pretending every second was magical. She didn’t know it yet, but she had her father wrapped around every finger. Afterward, the three of you grabbed dinner—simple, messy food that made your daughter giggle through every bite. But her yawns grew more frequent, and the inevitable post-sugar crankiness started creeping in.

“Alright, bath time,” you sang gently, trying to make it a game. She furrowed her brows and shook her head violently. “I don’t wanna!” she snapped, stomping her tiny foot with a pout. “You’ve been playing all day at the park, sweet girl. We don’t want any little bugs sneaking into bed with you,” you said, crouching to help her undress.“No!” she cried louder, tears springing to her eyes. “I want Papa! Not Mama!” The words hit like a slap. You froze, towel in your hand, the sting of rejection blooming beneath your ribs. This wasn’t the plan. You were supposed to bathe her. Sukuna would help her get dressed after. That was the compromise. That was the deal.

“C’mon baby,” you tried, voice trembling slightly. “Papa will help after your bath.”

“NO! I WANT PAPA! NO MAMA!” she screamed, her little fists balled in frustration. You didn’t know how long you stood there, but a soft knock pulled you from your thoughts. “Everything alright, my girls?” Sukuna’s voice came through the door, gentle, cautious. He peeked his head in. Your daughter reached out toward him like a lifeline. “I want Papa!” she sobbed. Your throat tightened. You didn’t want to cry in front of her. “C-could you bathe her?” you asked quietly, avoiding his eyes. “Of course,” he said immediately, stepping fully into the bathroom with calm, open arms. “Alright, up up up,” he chuckled, helping her out of her clothes. You sat against the bathroom wall, guilt curling up in your stomach like a second skin. Every instinct told you to run—to let them be alone—but fear kept you rooted.

“It’s okay, baby,” Sukuna murmured, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “We’ve got this.” He lifted your daughter into the tub with such natural ease, as if he’d been doing it forever. “You know how to bathe yourself, don’t ya’? You’re a big girl now,” he grinned, helping her squeeze the soap onto a little rag. He didn’t rush. Didn’t fumble. Just guided her gently, like he always did. “Gotta get under those arms, princess,” he chuckled as she missed a spot. You watched them quietly, a lump caught somewhere between your throat and your heart. The tenderness in his voice, the way he praised her, the patience. There was not a single dark thought in this man when it came to his child. Nothing but light. Eventually, you stepped out as he helped her wash her hair. By the time they emerged, she was wrapped in her soft pink robe, damp hair clinging to her cheeks, face flushed from warmth.

“All clean!” Sukuna beamed, carrying her into the room. “Wanna see if Mama will dress you?” She yawned big and shook her head. “No, Papa.” You tried to smile, nodding faintly and looking away as your eyes began to sting. Minutes passed. The door creaked open again. This time, Sukuna walked in alone. “Let’s go shower, baby,” he said quietly, walking to you without hesitation. He picked you up like you weighed nothing, cradling you against his chest as if you were just as small as her. Under the warm spray, he lathered your skin in slow circles, massaging your back, washing your hair, holding you upright when your knees trembled—not from exhaustion, but from emotion.

“I’m sorry I didn’t trust you,” you finally whispered, face pressed against his bare chest as the water beat down around you. He stroked your spine with firm, steady hands. “It’s alright, baby. You’re doing the best you can. I know that.” He dried you off just as tenderly as he had your daughter—wrapping you in your favorite robe, toweling your hair, pulling out your cotton panties and one of his soft t-shirts like he always knew which drawer to open.

He dressed you in silence, the kind of silence that didn’t need fixing. Only comfort. Only presence. Sukuna was a complicated man—vulgar at times, grumpy, brutally honest, fiercely protective. But in these quiet moments, he was something else entirely.

He was pure.

He was steady.

He was everything you had prayed for in a partner, and more than you ever thought you’d get.

And tonight, you saw that truth more clearly than ever.

[warriorofthought]

You, 3 Siblings and Bucky

Summary: You, the oldest, taking care of your three youngest siblings and you work one hour a week by Bucky. Word count: 1313 Warnings: Fear, injuries, exhausted Bucky x Reader

You wipe your hands on your jeans as you step out of the subway, the stale city air brushing against your face. It’s Friday. That means an hour with Bucky. Just one hour. Just enough.

You don’t say much when you knock on his door, and he never asks. He lets you in with a nod, his expression unreadable, maybe curious, but he doesn’t press. You do what he needs, small jobs, errands, sometimes helping him organize things he doesn’t want other people touching, helping him understand technology or social media. You’re good at staying quiet, at being invisible when you need to be.

The money he gives you afterward is more than you expect every time. He just slips it into your hand without looking and you never ask why. You don’t tell him it goes straight to rent, or that the second it's in your pocket, you're already planning how much of it will cover groceries, how much you’ll save for your little brother’s school uniform.

You’ve never told him that you have three other jobs, that right after this you’re heading to a restaurant to wash dishes until your fingers prune. That tomorrow morning you’ll be sweeping a building’s front steps and emptying bins until your back aches. That Sunday, before the sun even rises, you’ll be scrubbing bathrooms in a downtown office that no one ever really looks at.

You’ve never told him that you have three younger siblings waiting for you in a cramped one-bedroom apartment with peeling wallpaper and a window that doesn’t shut all the way. That you read to them every night so they don’t hear the sirens. That you teach them how to be small, how to stay quiet if anyone knocks who isn’t you.

You’ve never told him the real reason you left. That you ran. That the bruises weren’t fading fast enough, and your sister screamed too loud one night, and you knew you couldn’t stay, not even one more day. That now, every knock at the door makes you jump. That you live every day with the fear of being found.

You’ve never told him any of this.

You just take the money, thank him quietly, and leave. You carry it all alone, because if you stop to explain it, if you let even one word out, you’re afraid the whole fragile thing will shatter. And you can’t afford that.

Not when they’re counting on you.

_______________________

Your fingers hover over the call button longer than they should. You hate doing this. Cancelling means less money and less money means something else has to break. Food. Rent. Something.

But your youngest is in the hospital, and the message from the school was panicked, something about a fall, a head injury, a concussion. You saw the blood. You rode in the ambulance. And now you're sitting in the ER chair with a dry mouth and shaking hands, trying to figure out how the hell you're supposed to keep everything from falling apart.

You hit “Call.”

It rings twice before Bucky answers. His voice is gruff but low, familiar. "Yeah?"

“Hey” you say, your voice tighter than you want it to be. “I-I'm sorry, I have to cancel tonight. My sibling - my youngest- got hurt at school. We’re at the hospital. Concussion, maybe more, they’re still checking.”

There’s a pause on the line. You think maybe he’s annoyed. Or worse, cold.

But then he just says “Shit. Are they okay?”

“They’re stable. But I can’t leave them.” You glance over at the small figure curled up on the stretcher, IV in their arm, dried blood on their temple. “I have to figure out how to be here and also… take care of the others.”

You're rambling now. You hate it. “I still have to go to my other jobs - at least two of them, I can't lose those shifts. And I don’t know what to do with the others while I’m at work. One’s too young to stay home alone. I can’t afford a sitter. I don’t even know how I’m going to get dinner made tonight.”

You're trying to keep your voice down, but it cracks anyway.

You press a hand over your eyes. “I’m sorry, I know this isn’t your problem. I just… I didn’t want to disappear without saying something.”

Silence.

You wait, thinking maybe he hung up, because you shared too much.

But then Bucky says, quieter now, “You need help.”

It’s not a question.

“I’m fine” you lie, because it's reflex.

“No, you're not” he says, and there’s no edge to it. Just a statement. He doesn’t push, doesn’t ask for details. But there's something in his voice that doesn't sound like judgment. It sounds like understanding.

You bite your lip hard and swallow.

“I’ll figure it out” you say.

And you will. You have to.

After the call ends, you sit for a moment, the fluorescent lights buzzing above you, your head full of schedules, maps, plans. You need to find someone to watch the younger ones. Maybe that older lady down the hall. Maybe you trade shifts with someone. Maybe you lie, say your sibling is your child, and see if you qualify for a hospital overnight voucher.

You start listing every backup plan you can think of.

Because that’s what you do.

You patch the holes. You hold the weight. You keep going. Even when your hands shake.

Because your siblings need you.

The doctor comes back before you can start panicking properly.

“She’s stable” he says gently, looking at your little sister, eight years old, too pale, too still. “She has a mild concussion. No skull fracture, but we want to keep her overnight for observation.”

You nod, because it’s the only thing you can do. Your voice is gone, choked under the weight of everything you're already planning. One night in the hospital means one night not home. One night not home means the others are alone. You can’t have that.

As soon as the doctor leaves, you pull out your phone again. You’ve got two numbers you can maybe try. One’s your neighbor, Miss Carla. She’s always been kind to the kids when she sees them in the hallway. The other is the dishwasher shift lead who sometimes covers for you if you bring him an extra sandwich.

You call Carla first.

She agrees. Says she’ll watch your other two tonight. You almost cry with relief. You give her the door code, where the extra food is, and apologize about a hundred times. She just says “They’re sweet kids. Don’t worry, just take care of your girl.”

You hang up and call the restaurant next. No answer. You send a voice message instead, trying to sound calm. “Family emergency. My little sister’s in the hospital. Please let me make up the shift, I can come early Sunday.”

You hit send, then sit back in the stiff hospital chair, breathing hard. Your sister stirs a little, her eyes fluttering open, dazed.

You stand and lean over her immediately. “Hey. You’re okay. I’m right here.”

She whispers something you can’t make out, and then her eyes close again.

You brush the hair from her face, trying to steady yourself.

Your phone buzzes again.

It’s Bucky.

The message just says:

“Let me know if you need help. Not for the job. Just… help.”

You stare at it, surprised. Not because of the offer, but because somehow, he knows the difference.

You don’t reply right away. You don’t know how. You just tuck the phone into your jacket pocket, sit down and watch the machines beep gently beside your sister’s bed.

Tomorrow, the weight will still be there. The jobs. The rent. The school bills. But for now, you’re here. You did what you could. You’re still holding it all up.

Somehow. Still standing. Still surviving.

Part 2

[sanjarka]

one of the weirdest things about everyone thinking everlark aren’t horny for each other is of all the ya love interests at the time peeta is one of the ones with the least angst about getting close to katniss in a time of vampires and werewolves it was always ‘she loves me but we can never touch’. peeta was ready to touch and kiss katniss whenever she wanted. he was kissing her when he could in the first games. he was making out with her in his lap, and the only angst was he thought he should die. the least angsty part of the books is how much they enjoy touching each other. it’s just so nice to see a ya novel where physical intimacy isn’t treated as the actual forbidden dilemma, just a respite

oh absolutely but now you also got me thinking about the fact that actually peeta (and everlark) really does have a lot of angst it's just not done in a typical way. now maybe you don't agree with me and that's completely fine but the way that peeta makes sense to me is that, basically, he's been searching for the proof of love his entire life. waiting for his parents to be proven wrong. waiting for a sign that life doesn't have to be lived like that. so he's very much ready to be with katniss whenever she asks only he doesn't understand that he's not really ready to be loved himself. obviously i don't think any teenager is, but considering his upbringing i don't see him being comfortable with being seen. which is exactly what being loved means.

for example if i were to transfer peeta into a modern universe i could genuinely see him as someone who jumps from relationships, giving anyone a chance to love him because he's that desperate. but what he ends up doing instead, is self sabotaging by never allowing himself to open up in a significant way because it would involve acting like a flawed not perfect human being. to return to the canon world, for as much as both katniss and haymitch put him on a pedestal, he really makes it easy for them to do that in the first place. because he reads people well and he can tell what they need he's going to prioritize acting in the right, appropriate way over being honest.

whenever he's vulnerable (especially in the first book) he's using it to save katniss. or both of them. he doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve because that's just who he is. it's on purpose. it's how he rebels.

/ in many ways i see the progression of his and katniss's relationship to be the first honest relationship he has. it's not perfect, it's a process but it still very much stands out from anyone else in his life. another reason as to why the hijacking works so well for his character arc eventually is because katniss still needs him. after everything, after he was forced to be the worst possible version of himself it's still only him for her. katniss still wants him. that has to be a start of a realization that he can open up, that he can wake katniss up after he had a nightmare. and it's still going to be hard. i still think it's something that katniss has to, at times, almost force out of him. but that it gets easier over time, or maybe just more possible. that they both end up in a relationship in which they understand that you need to allow someone to see love you. that it's not really possible without that permission. /

katniss on other hand knows exactly what love is. for her love was what almost killed her and prim. and i'm not trying to romanticize asterid's response to burdock's death because her depression very likely exists outside of him, but if she hadn't loved him as much as she did, it wouldn't have been a strong enough trigger. her parents loved each other in a way that no other parents are described doing in any hg story so far and they are punished for it (every love story is in one way or another. arlo and lil are hanged; the moment snow and lucy gray's relationship starts breaking is when the world they live in forces them to survive in any way possible even if it means killing people; lenore dove eats the gumdrops). and so what i'm trying to say is that katniss understands just how much love can hurt when it is lost and she doesn't want it but peeta wants to be hurt so he can prove it exists. so the angst is very much there but it's different to how it usually goes.

anyways... thanks for the ask 🌷

[so-and-sos-blog]

I've had similar thoughts to lapislantern's argument here (I hope you don't mind me shortening the reblog chain). The past year has gotten me leaning a lot more towards your side, but I think there is something to this argument.

(Apologies if this gets rambly and/or if I overexplain things that are obvious.)

When you put up a poster, you are signaling two things:

1. The content of the poster.

2. That there is a reason why sharing that content was worth designing the poster, printing it with paper and ink, and going around putting it up in places.

If you want to inform people of something they don't know or convince them of something they don't agree with, then point 2 is basically trivial. But someone has to not agree. Nobody puts up posters saying "the sky is blue". It's true, but everyone knows it's true, and everyone knows that everyone knows.

Similarly (warning for antisemitic slogan), no reasonable person would put up a poster saying "Jews will not replace us". Of course you won't. That doesn't even make sense. But in the context of believing that Jews are trying to "replace" white people, then the statement becomes a rallying cry. The full message is "I know that Jews are trying to replace us, but they will fail because we are strong". That interpretation provides the reason for putting up the poster. And I'd argue that anyone who sees that poster will immediately understand that. Thus, that reason ("Jews are trying to replace us") is part of the message.

(See also: "not all men" -> "feminists hate all men", "it's okay to be white" -> "SJWs are trying to make you think that being white is bad".)

Could it have been intended to mean something else? Maybe, but there are two things to note. First, if I'm right, it conveys this idea regardless. "Convey" here means it might put the idea in people's heads, persuade people to believe it, or embolden people who already agree against those who disagree. And if it does, then that's going to cause harm, and that matters. Second, if the author meant something different, there's at least a chance that they would have realized the problem and avoided it. But they didn't, and that's evidence.

So, about the hostages.

Back in late 2023, it seemed (to me and apparently a bunch of people I'd been following) like everyone outside of Tumblr was talking about October 7th, about the hostages, about condemning antisemitism, and nobody was talking about what Israel was doing to the people of Gaza. And if they did, they downplayed it, and/or they were lambasted for "making no mention of October 7th/the hostages/Israel's right to defend itself". Celebrities were being blacklisted for posting links to Palestinian charities on social media. Someone painted over a "Free Palestine" mural to make it say "Free the hostages". Only after the ICJ hearing in early 2024 did the mainstream conversation seem to turn against Israel. That might not be a good description of the full picture, but that was what I perceived.

And in that context, saying "Bring them home"/“Free the hostages” or whatever seems pointless to say. Nobody is saying "don't bring them home, I hope they die". But people are saying "it's not worth killing thousands of other people just to bring them home" and being attacked for it. And to someone who either doesn't know or doesn't care very much about the Palestinian death toll, the latter sounds like the former: they would believe that if you oppose Israel’s actions in the war, you must just not care about the hostages and/or about Jews. I'm 90% sure I have seen at least someone saying exactly that. And that interpretation provides a reason to put up the poster. And so that seems to be the message that the poster conveys.

At least, that's what I would have said early on. But in a cultural context where "I care about these Israeli lives" *isn't* obvious, all of that might be moot. And after following a few Jumblr blogs for a year, and watching antizionist blogs on my dash get progressively more deranged, I don't know anymore.

But I hope that all makes sense.

no like fr the way that a lot of people look at israelis -- there's no group of people on earth i look at that way. literally no group of people where i'd look at posters of hostages from that group and go "that's obviously genocide propaganda i'm tearing it down." certainly not any group of people where i'd watch a video of their house blowing up and hear a woman crying for her dog in the rubble and point and laugh.

i can't even imagine having that response honestly. i can imagine apathy sure but glee? over people suffering? looking at a whole nationality that way? there's no way

i think that has to corrode your soul. i mean how can't it?

[angxl-k9]

I have a sincere and genuine question (one which you are free to ignore)

But I wanted to ask about why you’re pro endogenic/willogenic/nontraumagenic etc.?

I dont ask to stir controversy, but rather because i think I want to understand more about it all and am reaching out to see others experiences in why they believe/see the world how they do

In my early exposure to/learning about systemhood I was taught a lot by those who don’t really like/believe the nontraumagenic claims. As I see more and more of the community and its variations- I find myself more unsure about what is or isn’t true. I ask here instead of consulting the internet because finding clear research on the topic has been increasingly difficult for me and I find I’m not sure exactly where or how to look

Obviously you are probably not the information god of this subject, but i guess I’m looking mostly for your outlook/view on things to just really hear from others in the community on a subject I’m struggling with

hey anon. the biggest reason i’m pro-endo is because i’m part of a mixed origins system. but, i see that that probably isn’t a satisfactory answer to most people wanting to learn more hahaha

the second biggest reason is, well, i am not anyone else nor am i in their brain, so i cannot tell if someone is telling the truth about their experiences or not. therefore, i have to take what people say at face value. if they say they’re a system, i have no right to tell them no, they’re not. that right only belongs to them, and to some extent their psychiatrist/psychologist/therapist.

another reason: the absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. just because there is little research into endogenic systems doesnt mean they’re not real. there’s not much undeniable evidence of aliens yet people still believe that they exist. why? because like the human brain, the universe is infinitely complex and we just don’t have the time, money or equipment to study every single aspect of it, especially if those aspects don’t pose an immediate threat on us as humans. endogenic systems themselves aren’t being hurt by their plurality, unlike with did/osdd systems who face severe symptoms with their disorder. in a medical perspective, there’s not much point researching something that isn’t harmful. did and osdd need research so that the systems with those disorders can actually function. endogenic systems with disorders, if they have them, usually have disorders that are already being researched all the time, such as autism, adhd, ocd, bpd, (c)ptsd, etc. so there are already people trained in dealing with those disorders that can help endogenic systems with them, as they would help anyone with them.

however, in saying all that, there actually IS research on endogenic systems, just not as much perhaps as disordered systems. i’ve found some research papers that i like and think are unbiased and fair, so i’m going to make a google doc with links to them, or to where you can download them, and that will be at the bottom of this post. i do think these papers do a lot of help for the endogenic community, especially against sysmedicalists and anti-endos who rely solely on medical evidence and research in order to believe in something (which i absolutely disagree with, i believe we should take what people say about their identity and just believe it without needing ten medical papers to back it up).

i hope this brings a little clarity to my stance on endogenic plurality, and obviously this is just my stance. there are many other systems out there who have different and perhaps better reasons for believing in endogenic plurality. if you’re on reddit at all, i highly highly encourage you to go to r/plural and have a look around there. the people there are so lovely and many of them would love to give you even more resources.

anyway, i hope you have a great day anon, and i hope you find the answers you want about endogenic plurality!

here is the document

and another link to a spreadsheet of more resources

[agentrouka-blog]

I believe in the pre-canon crush as well. Do you think Ned had any idea at all? What about any other member of the family or even within the larger Winterfell community? I keep thinking that Jeyne and Sansa had a kissing game with Jon as a parallel to Cat, Lysa, and Petyr. Or do you know anyone who has written anything on that specific topic?

(You can find some posts I made and far more that I reblogged on the subject in my pre canon jonsa tag)

If GRRM chooses to make the pre-canon feelings a thing, then I think he will handle it indeed similarly to the childlike, innocent fancies of the Tully children (until they were not, that is) and the Tyrell games, and not similar to the experimentation of Jaime and Cersei that veered away from innocent fairly quickly. There has to be plausible deniability, and an accounting for their young age. There may well have been kissing games! GRRM keeps mentioning those for a reason, likely. And it would be very much in character for young Jon to suffer a mild existential crisis over detecting a crush-like feeling on his more distant, romantic half-sister and everything she represents - and then repress it violently and with a good dose of deep shame. Like, say, his dreams of being Lord of Winterfell.

But I sincerely doubt this is something that would have been detectable. It's - understandably - an implausible thing to worry about for anyone around and it would take a lot of unusual behavior for anyone to take notice. Which is something neither of them are known for. Ned would not have hesitated to foster Jon somewhere else if he had ever had reason to suspect something of this nature. Again, understandably. Anyway, I doubt Ned knew a lot about what went on inside Jon, in general. He has no idea Jon was worried about his future and thinking about the Watch. So.

If this comes up - and it well might - it's about internal turmoil rather than outward suspicion. Basically, transplanting some of the incest angst "torment" GRRM referenced in that infamous outline back into the past to leave more room for exploring the resolution of it in the present. Because the man has ground to cover and only two books left to do it. He can't have them wallowing in shock and shame forever. Or, rather, Jon. Given Sansa's penchant for Aemon and Naerys I genuinely don't think she will struggle remotely as much as Jon "I am but a failure of a filthy bastard" Snow. She's very accepting of her own desires, even if they make her blush. (See Loras.)

[lateiii]

Honestly, every time someone has told someone else that I'm trans - without consulting me - it's been a cis person. (I'm not sure if anyone's told my deadname, I hope not, because I hated it, and I would be even more pissed.)

It isn’t like even for a good reason. Like if they had had another friend who was trans and struggling with something related to that, I think I'd be fine with them just saying "Hey, I have this pretty level headed friend who's also trans, and could maybe help you out?"

But no. It's I told my boyfriend because he was jealous. And another one not even telling me she told her boyfriend. And my sister apparentally telling her father in law - based on how that son of a bitch was looking at me in my sister's wedding.

And yes, I've moved past most of this, and in my personal (and professional life) I am atm quite out of the closet. But there was a time when I lived partly in stealth, and was very uncomfortable with people knowing more about me than I knew about them. So the idea that any of my cis friends could just take my transness and spread it around because they didn’t understand everything that was linked to being trans - drove me quite insane from time to time.

And not only that, it worried me that someone's boyfriend's friend might hear, and maybe his friends weren't that cool about transness, because apparentally it's just something people think first about a person if they know they're trans.

Like cis people don’t understand, that when they out someone as trans, the worst thing that might probably happen to them is someone would be mean? Someone might question, why are you friends with a trans person, or try to call out how clearly that someone is trans, or that transness is just a mind virus, a trend, or a dicease - and it might be awkward for them. However, if wrong people heard from them about someone being trans, and they knew where this person worked or lived? They might harrass them, beat them up, stalk and follow them, threaten them, blackmail them, vandalize their apartment, out them to their boss and co-workers, assault them or just try to kill them. Especially if we're talking small towns and conservative countries.

And it bothers me SO MUCH that they don’t realize what power that knowledge has. They just take it as this fun little fact they can tell about themselves: "Oh, I have a trans friend, you've met him, yeah, we went to school together...." No. That knowledge isn’t yours to spread. Just. Shut. Your. Trap.

Again. In a better place now - though clearly peeved. But I still don't care for the habit of casually outing trans people, that cis folk do. Often I want to be met as me, not as this stereotypical idea of a trans person, and it would be super fucking cool if cis people would stop acting like someone's transness is their knowledge that they can spread around as a cool fact.

(Even if someone says a penis joke to your friend, and you know he's a trans man and doesn't at least yet have a penis, YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY IT OUT LOUD!)

it's sorta funny (ignoring the horrors) that cis people can't be trusted with a deadname. any time someone tells me theirs I've forgotten it five minutes later, if you had names for your toes that would be far more interesting to me, but cis people get real "if you give a mouse a cookie" about it it

[fae-cookie-run-madness]

Personalities/Persona’s of the beasts (CoB au)

I figure it would be interesting to sort of go through and explain the beasts personality and/or persona they put on before the beast yeast arc. Explaining how they think and how the kingdom views them.

Mystic Flour and the Dark Cacao Kingdom:

Now going by Plain Flour, she has been a key part of the kingdom since she was with Dark Cacao during its founding. Now despite leaving behind a lot of magic and part of herself, she is still very calm and smart, it was her suggestions that made it so the kingdom could thrive in such harsh climate (even though she would have like to live where the air doesn’t hurt your face). Mystic has a deep trust and love for Dark Cacao, both understanding each other. Dark Cacao is the only ancient to hear the unfiltered version of what happen from Mystic, ever cookie turned to flour by her enlightenment. And yet he still opted to stay by her side and understand her.

Plain Flour, being their queen, seems very similar to Dark Cacao personality wise. She is a silent, focus and driven individual when it comes to her goals. However while Dark Cacao’s goals are building up the wall and protection, Plain Flour is about healing the sick and making sure people get fed. Earning her domain over the sick and anyone else that needs help while Dark Cacao looks over the general kingdom and warriors. Because of this contrast, and the fact Plain Flour is more silent than Cacao. This leads many of the kingdom to assume she is weaker of the two and that Dark Cacao is the only true ruler. Something Dark Cacao will quickly make sure you regret thinking.

To the Dark Cacao Kingdom, Plain Flour is almost a silent saint of a queen. Despite not talking, or expressing her emotions outwardly. You can feel how much she cares by how she tends to the sick, how she makes sure everyone in the kingdom is fed. How she interacts with cookies, no matter which tribe they come from. And they see the devotion from her that reflected in Dark Cacao’s eyes.

To the Dark Cacao Kingdom, Plain Flour is there wonderful Queen.

Burning Spice and the Golden Cheese Kingdom:

Warning Spice was the name Golden Cheese gave Burning Spice when welcoming him into her kingdom. She was lucky, a good part of his joy for destruction was left in that tree, leaving a very broken god of destruction in its place. Golden Cheese knows how much Spice is hurting just from their first interaction and wanting death. And while she can’t fully change someone’s mind, she could offer them a chance to live and change their own mind. And it was from that willingness and kindness mixed with determination that Spice found himself falling in love.

Warming Spice is not a king or officially married to Golden Cheese, he for some reason thinks it will make things worst and she listens. However while no cookie could match Golden Cheese in the statues of their Golden god, Warning Spice is more seen as an agent of her will. He protect the kingdom, tears down building should Golden ask him too, he’s the one in charge of dragging Cookie’s to the colosseum and dungeons should they commit a crime. This leads to most of the Cheese Kingdom to see too side of the Spice cookie, one side who is scary determined, who can give glare that chill you to your bone, and the other side warming, the one fighting so the citizens don’t suffer, the one watching people live their lives with a warm smile on his face.

To the Golden Cheese Kingdom, Warming Spice is a both reassuring and terrifying force of the queen’s will. His smile, devotion to the Golden Goddess, even his willingness to help even without destruction as his hands shake. All of which the kingdom admires. Even the terrifying parts of Spice cookie; the one who has laid waste to army’s of invaders, the one tears down building with his bare hands, the one who job it is to protect Golden Cheese cookie. Even those darker parts of him bring comfort to the people of the Cheese Kingdom, knowing at their core, he will keep them safe.

To the Golden Cheese Kingdom, Warming Spice is a terrifying yet loving force the protects the kingdom.

Shadow Milk and the Vanilla Kingdom:

Blueberry Milk, the name adopted by Shadow Milk cookie did not have a great start when he found Pure Vanilla. A hurt cookie, two children about to crumble in his hands, he was ready to use every dirty trick in the book when Pure Vanilla refused to help but that didn’t happen. Pure Vanilla greeted the confused cookie with open arms and work days and nights to save the two little children. The healer even worked trying to save his maimed legs even thought it was useless. For once Shadow Milk didn’t have to earn someone’s trust, or have someone not listen to his pleads. After so many years Pure Vanilla was one of the few that listen right away. That base of trust, and the feeling that follow, it’s what earn his place in the Vanilla Kingdom.

Blueberry Milk started out as an advisor to the king. At first many of the citizen saw it as weird, of the king disappearing before bring back this weird cookie and giving him the role of advisor. However these fears quickly died away when Blueberry dominated the political game, he seemed to know what everyone was thinking, who was plotting what and what would lead to ruin. Even if Pure Vanilla always had the final say, most agree that Blueberry was the one calling the shots. With this, trades increase, the infighting with nobles seem to decrease, just an era of peace followed him; even if their was just something off about the way he smile. Blueberry typically would do many odd things not befitting of an advisor. He would teach small classes of magic, sometimes he would babysit little doughling, other times he would wonder around the kingdom, seeing how it grew.

To the Vanilla Kingdom, Blueberry Milk is a kind, funny but seemingly all knowing advisor of the king. It’s clear he admires the king and is always honest with him, something that is mirror by Pure Vanilla. He love teaching spells to magic users; sometimes he will tell fantastical stories that sound so real to children until Pure Vanilla informs them that it’s just a story. However with all the kindness and loyalty he has to Pure Vanilla there is always the darker side. The one mostly seen in the room of nobles, the one who watches them with viper eyes. The one who gave a knowing smile when two nobles who were planning a takeover tore themselves apart.

To the Vanilla Kingdom, Blueberry Milk is a kind knowing Advisor with a darker side, which they choose to ignore.

Eternal Sugar and the Hollyberry Kingdom:

Sweet Sugar was the name Eternal Sugar took when Hollyberry found her. It was honestly by accident but Holly never regrets it. Finding a sleeping cookie with a bloody back, sometimes she still had nightmares of not finding Sugar. It took a long time to get Eternal Sugar back to enjoying and wanting to live life again. The idea of happiness crumbling and crushing away always hung over her head. But something about Hollyberry and her together. It just clicked, they were happier together, and seemed to be able to support each other.

Sweet Sugar isn’t a noble or anything like that in the Hollyberry Kingdom, she is considered a long time friend of Hollyberry and a wonderful musician. However anyone with eyes could tell there is something more between there Queen and this friend of hers, yet most don’t say anything. Maybe because they had once raised a stink about Hollyberry marrying one of the nobles and she’s refused to marry ever sense. Despite Sugar’s lack of noble status you will always see her at parties, her singing always seems to calm people down and bring out the best in them. She also the person you go to for any type of gossip, never one to public with the information but she finds way to use it. The only thing odd about her is her little garden behind the palace. It’s the only part of castle that’s restricted like the bedrooms, no one outside of family is allowed to visit. Those who has snuck peaks, comment that it’s beautiful, yet decorated with weirdly familiar statues.

To the Hollyberry Kingdom, Sweet Sugar is a longtime friend of their Queen, who is just as kind as Hollyberry. She is quiet and comforting, the one you could go to vent your troubles too during a party. The ones who looks give your the sense that your burdens are not yours alone to deal with. Many in the Kingdom see her as a kind angel, the one who helps gather berries, the one who hold you when family disappears, the one who reminds you to take it slow.

To the Hollyberry Kingdom, Sweet Sugar is a friend of the Queen who is the kindness of the kingdom personified.

Silent Salt and ??? Kingdom:

As far as history is known, White Lily didn’t have a kingdom to look after. She was traveling trying to find answers, and most that knew her also saw Pure Salt.

To anyone that ever met White Lily. Pure Salt was her knight, her silent bodyguard.

[bingleboy]

~ ♡ TF2 Mercs Comfort HCs! Pt. 1 ♡ ~

Featured mercs: Medic, Pyro, Scout, Sniper, Spy

Contains: All SFW fluff, g/n reader, implied reader is a merc on their team, platonic + romantic stuffs

How I think they would comfort you if you had a bad day :]

I might make a pt 2 if anyone wants to see it! These are just the characters I thought I could write for best atm teehee.

💉 Medic 💉

General

He's not oblivious to your bad mood, but he isn't sure what to do at first. It might take him a while to ask what's going on, if you don't come to him first.

He tries to be fair to the rest of the team in battle and not play favorites with you, but it shows just a little bit. He sticks around you a little more and encourages you before he has to run off somewhere else

I think he would not be used to comforting people. He definitely cares about your feelings! He's just more of a violent revenge kind of guy. He understands if you turn down his offer to torture someone for you

But if you come to him to talk about your feelings/ask for comfort, he does feel proud that you trust him enough to do that, and of course he will do his best to help.

If you want to talk, he would suggest going to his office! You can lay down, make yourself comfortable, don’t worry about him, he’ll stay sitting- wait, is he taking notes while you’re talking?

Psychoanalyzing you out of love

I feel like he would be giving you like insanely strong eye contact while you’re talking lol. He just wants to show he’s listening, but he’ll try to stop staring if you tell him to.

His advice about the situation is 50/50. It’s either very thoughtful and reasonable or it’s fucking insane. Sometimes he’ll say the insane ones to try to make you laugh, but it’s not always obvious when he’s joking or not.

He’ll pat your shoulder and try to cheer you up rationally- he won’t sugarcoat it if things really are bad, but if all else fails, he reminds you what you’re going through is temporary, and you’re a strong person

Romantic

If you’re his partner, he will be in your business 1000% more

Tell him everything, give him details!!!

He needs to know exactly how to make you feel better, or else he’ll get a bad grade in boyfriend :(

He does approach his comfort sort of like an experiment at first, considering a lot of possibilities and his knowledge of you to figure out what you would like most

He’ll take you to his doves if you’re a fellow animal lover, and let you pet them and hold them in your hands. They’re so fluffy and polite. Archimedes might peck at your fingers, but it’s with affection

If all you want is something like cuddles and quality time together, he is surprised. He was kind of expecting this is to be a problem to ‘solve’, but it’s relieving to know his company is enough

He’s a good listener (takes notes) and also a good talker, if you want distraction. He has a lot of funny stories of past patients and fun facts about human anatomy to tell you. He’ll get you some tea or coffee and put a blanket over your shoulders while he talks your ear off

Likes holding you cozied up on the couch, his arms loosely around you with your head on his chest

🔥 Pyro 🔥

General

Somewhere in the middle when it comes to how observant they are. Doesn't notice immediately, but does pick up on it.

As soon as they do notice, they'll definitely hang around you way more. In battle, they're never far from where you are, ready to set anyone bothering you on fire.

Outside of battle, they'll still be trailing after you and offering you things. Snack? Drink? Lighter? Flamethrower? Unicorn plushie?

They'll tug on your arm and suggest doing something together to cheer you up. Like lighting the training dummies on fire!

If you're not in the mood to set things on fire, other options include a tea party in their room (with their toys), watching TV in the main room, or drawing together.

While you rant about things, they will be nodding along and chipping in with muffled words that sound supportive. If you're angry, they're angry! If you're sad, they're sad. :(

Romantic

Lots of soft touches. Touching your arms, fixing your hair, your shirt, your glasses if you wear them

Will give you pretend kisses on the cheek, like make a loud kissy noise while putting their mask up to your cheek lol

Holds your hand a lot ☺️

You will have to pry them off of you if you need two hands for something

They’re not great with words (especially with the mask) but they really do empathize strongly with you. They try to show that through their actions, being around you and showing they care

Very open to tagging along to whatever you want to do, whether its going out and being destructive or staying comfy inside

⚾ Scout ⚾️

General

Sort of oblivious at first if you're trying to hide your feelings. As soon as he notices something's off, he doesn't think twice about asking you right away.

"Alright, ya hardly been laughin' at my hilarious jokes today! What's the matter with you?" (He asks in an affectionate way, but he has to be a little annoying about it.)

When you confide in him, his playful expression will drop. He kind of wasn't expecting a serious conversation, and he feels like a fish out of water.

"Oh. Uh... jeez. Didn't realize it was that bad."

If your team still has to fight, he'll try not to be obvious that he's following you around, but you've seen him zipping back and forth a lot more than usual.

Definitely tries to hype you up (hypes himself up too). Will make a huge deal if you guys do literally anything good. "We are da freakin' best at this! We're carryin' the whole damn team."

Tries his best to make you laugh, whether it's by messing with the enemy team or your own.

After work, he’ll go to you right away and ask if you wanna hang out. Got nothing else to do tonight, you know, no other reason…. (King of failing to hide how much he cares)

Play some baseball with him! If you’re terrible at it, he won’t make fun of you, but he will insist you try. Come on, you’re learning from a pro!

If you’re already good, he’s pleasantly surprised, and he’ll gladly shower you in compliments. That’s what would make him feel better, so he figures it might work for you too.

Romantic

His knee-jerk reaction to seeing you upset is to be angry at whoever made you upset, before he even knows why. Immediately offering to beat someone up for you.

If you explain why you’re feeling down, that anger melts away into sympathy. Come on, you can hang out with him in his room for a while to forget about it.

I think he’d be more quiet than usual if he knew you were feeling bad. Maybe it’s a mixture of not quite knowing what to say and wanting to be more comforting, giving you more space to talk.

He’d be a cuddly person. He talks a lot, and he’ll tell you all about how great you are, but he just feels like he has to touch you to show you how much he cares. He’ll lay down beside you in bed and hold your hand while you guys talk, his thumb tracing over your knuckles.

He also likes touching your hair. He’ll play with it while you’re cuddling or while you’re talking.

Totally wants you to sleep over and is not subtle about it. You WILL stay over and cuddle with him.

🎯 Sniper 🎯

He's observant, of course he's gonna know you're feeling down. He can read you like a book, even if you're trying to hide it.

He's a good person to go to for comfort. He's a great listener, and he's got all the patience in the world, especially for you.

Just very calming aura tbh

After the battle's done, he hangs around you for a bit while he turns the words over in his head, but he decides to just be direct.

"Mate. You been lookin' down out there. You wanna tell me what's going on?"

Will definitely be hanging out with you after work that day. If you let him pick what to do, he’ll suggest going for a little road-trip to somewhere nice, like a park. Or, if you don’t feel like that, you can just hang out with him in his camper and he’ll fix you some tea.

Best listener if you want to rant or talk out your problem. He might not always have any advice to give, but he always makes you feel understood.

(Romantic)

Calls you by cutesy nicknames 100% more. Roo, sweetheart, darling, darl, love, etc etc.

Another cuddly person WOOOO! (i’m biased)

King of chilling out. Loves sitting beside you or laying down next to you and holding you close, your head tucked under his chin. And he’d gently rub your back and cradle your head oouugggghhhh he’s tender

Kisses your forehead ☹️ guys he’s so cute pls

He’ll be happy enjoying the quiet with you. If you want him to talk, he’ll softly tell you about his day, or things he found funny, while you cuddle.

🗡 Spy 🗡

Catches on to your shift in mood quickly, obviously. He knows exactly what 'tells' to look for, those little expressions others might miss.

He acts a little more friendly to you proactively, especially in battle. He'll keep an eye on you and compliment your work when you shoot down an enemy.

You might also happen to come across more medkits than you usually do. Very mysterious.

After the day is done, if you're still feeling bad, he'll invite you into his smoking room to unwind with him. He prefers that to be his space, but he’ll let you in on occasion.

He is certainly good at curating the environment. It’s so aesthetic. Fully stocked bookshelves, a fireplace, and record player are notable features. It smells of smoke in the room, obviously, but also like an expensive leather. The fire crackles, and the room is illuminated by a soft orange light. His chairs are comfortable, and you’re welcome to them as long as you keep your shoes off of them.

He’ll let you pick the record to play. I’m totally biased but I think he’d have some Nina Simone,

He’ll nod along and listen to you talk, sometimes humming in response.

I feel like if you’re friends, just spending time together will be how he’s most likely to comfort you. He’ll offer you things to make you more comfortable, like a drink or a cigarette, but he thinks just being in the same room while you each do your own thing is most comfortable.

That being said, he’s also very down to talk shit about anyone, 100%.

His comfort verbally is…. maybe a little unusual? I feel like he’d be saying nice things but like, not in a soft way. He reassures you as if what he’s saying is obvious.

“You think the team doesn’t need you? Please, don’t be ridiculous. They’re terrible as it is, but, they’d be truly hopeless without you.”

(Romantic)

He might act (mostly) nonchalant in front of the team, but the moment you’re alone together, he’s swooping in by your side and insisting you come spend time with him.

He seems like a gift-giving type of guy. Any food or sweet you’re craving, he’ll gladly get it for you- plus a bouquet of your favorite flowers, of course.

He’ll buy you a new outfit too if he knows it would cheer you up- something perfectly tailored. You don’t know how he knows your measurements, but he does.

Not super cuddly, but he does like it. Sit next to him and lean on him, let him put his arm around you and rub your shoulder.

Will hold your hand and kiss your knuckles, then your cheek, then your lips. (The order is important)

You’re his little flower ☹️ he hates seeing you unhappy, and he does everything in his power to make you cozy and comfortable in his smoking room

Will be way more sappy in his verbal comfort, including that fancy french shit. Even if you don’t understand it, you can tell by his tone that it’s terms of endearment

Mon cœur, mon amor, my love, my dear, mon ange, anything with ‘my’ in front of it tbh

[danmei-hot-takes]

i see a lot of people on this blog talking about smut vs no smut, but I firmly believe that every bl fan falls into one of two camps.

The first one is the group of people that believe smut scenes are simply part of bl; that without it, it's like pancakes without syrup. Fine, enjoyable even given the right pancake recipe, but definitely lacking something. People in this camp can vary in their enjoyment of smut, with some people practically forcing themselves through everything else to get to it, to others simply enjoying it just as much as the rest of the ride.

The other group is made of those who don't believe that smut is an integral part of bl. This camp tends to err on the side of disliking smut. Rather than smut being the syrup on your pancakes, it's like sprinkles on your ice cream. Does it look sparkly and attract a lot of customers? Yes. Does it actually bring anything substantial to the ice cream? No, and it might even disrupt the creamy texture of the ice cream. Like the first group, people in this one can vary in their enjoyment of smut. Some people like it, some are closer to tolerating the scenes when they come along, and others actively avoid it.

My hot take is that camp 2 "should" be correct. And this doesn't have anything to do with purity or the idea that sex is immoral or inappropriate. I myself enjoy smut in various types of media - manhwa, danmei, fanfiction, and even live action bl series. However, I think that one of the main arguments that camp 1 uses to defend their stance is that besides the fact that it can just be enjoyable for the sake of being enjoyable, it's a good insight to the characters, their relationship dynamic, and their development. I don't necessarily disagree, and I think it can be true, just not as often as people seem to think.

The thing is, I believe that if a book is written well, it should be able to communicate those things without smut. A character's personality/development and the way it relates to the other character's personality/development doesn't only show itself through sex. A real human's character is evident in many different scenarios, rather than only when getting down and dirty, so why should it be any different for danmei characters?

If I had to put myself in a camp, it'd be the second one. That said, I have nothing against sprinkles on my ice cream, to bring the metaphor back for a moment. And I have no problem with you if you prefer your ice cream with sprinkles. But I do feel a little icky when anyone starts talking about how you should or shouldn't want them. And if I wished that there were more ice cream that came with less sprinkles, or none at all, that doesn't mean I'm against sprinkles existing as a topping. It only means I don't want sprinkles as a default.

Y’know what this is a completely valid argument and I understand what you’re saying and the analogy is solid.

However… I do believe in the power of a payoff. I’m also old and started my bl journey reading yaoi scanlations and fully support the whole ‘no climax, no point, no meaning’ rhetoric.

I’m more lenient when it comes to danmei because of censorship, though I do favour smut peddling. It’s basically the reason that I’ve never got into manhua. All the manhwa I read is r rated.

I dunno, I just find reading smut really calming.

Basically what I’m saying is, the art of writing itself is important and there’s a lot of really good bl creators out there. But sometimes, sometimes you just need to see a monster cock before you can sleep at night.

[agent19mockingbird]

“Well, considering the response it usually gets me, which is you tapping out and me winning in two ways, you could say I like doing it,” Natasha smirked down at him with a wink. “And you won’t hear many complaints from me about that being your favorite place to stick your head.”

She nodded in agreement, understanding where he was coming from completely; among the list of reasons she’d been attracted to Clint initially was how hot he was. “I know what you mean. I’m nervous, too. I’ve certainly flirted with lots of women but I’ve never slept with any of them. I agree; I think making out first will help break the ice between all of us and is a good place to start.”

“Uh huh,” she replied with a teasing roll of her eyes. She tilted his head back gently and began running her fingers through his hair, making sure to get all the suds out. “I also think that if you’re nervous, and once we’ve made sure that Clint and Bobbi are okay, that you say something. They could also be nervous or scared or excited, just like we are.”

——————

Bobbi shook her head in agreement; the mission they were on was a big one and Fury had impressed its importance on them multiple times before they’d left and since. “I know, I get what you mean. I don’t want anyone to have to come in and replace us and I’m worried about that. But more importantly, I understand what you mean about trying to do that conversation here and your worries about it. What would help you relax that isn’t harmful to you or to anyone else? What can I do to help?” she asked softly.

She returned to washing her body as she watched him be silent for a long moment. She’d already pushed him to speak his mind once before and wasn’t going to do so again. Once he spoke, she frowned as she considered what he said. “That’s….hmm. I get why you might be feeling that way, and that’s understandable. Let’s table that discussion for now until it’s a better time for us to talk to Bucky and Nat about it. They should be included in it, you know? It’s only fair. And we can gauge where they’re at and how they feel about it happening or not too.”

“Mkay,” Bobbi nodded, nuzzling him for a moment. She finished washing her body and rinsed off, watching him with a smile as she waited. Once he was done, she reached out and grabbed their towels, handing one to him to use.

The redhead snickered at his reply, knowing exactly what he was talking about. “I don’t know that I’d suggest calling him one to his face, at least not until you two know each other better in multiple ways, but Clint Barton is absolutely a little shit. You can say that about him to me. He’s my best friend and I call him that at least once a week. But yeah, I’m pretty sure he takes his shirt off on purpose to be distracting. I need to ask Bobbi how she manages to beat him at sparring, what her secret is. And yeah, sparring with him is something else. Though I will say, you’re my favorite sparring partner,” she winked.

She sucked in a breath when she felt his hands curl around her thighs, making her eye them. “I agree, which is why as much as I like where your hands are, I need you to move them lower, please. And as a reward, once we’ve finished here, checked on Clint and Bobbi, made sure they don’t need us, then we can have more fun if we still want to. Sound fair?”

———————

Bobbi made a face as she thought about it. “Maybe? I do feel like it’ll be nicer to do at home, in our own bed and our stuff. I just feel like we need to sort out our mess first before we try to bring in another couple. Bucky and Nat both have their own issues and shit that they’re dealing with; they don’t deserve to have to be in the middle of ours too. It’s not fair to them. You know?”

Bobbi smiled tiredly at him and nodded. “After we’ve gotten some sleep first, we should also talk more about us and make sure we’re on the same page there. Which might sound weird but I hope it makes sense.”

She leaned into him for a moment, playing with the ends of his hair as she felt relief: he still loved her and wasn’t leaving her. “Yes please, preferably before we get pruny. Need me to wash anything for you?”

[anti-transphobia]

Twitter users have learned the term "weaponized incompetence" and of course are using it wrong and it's pissing me off. The latest example of "weaponized incompetence" is a husband who decided to make crescent rolls but didn't realize he needed to roll them up so he made large crescent chips instead. Literally just a mistake. Y'know. Those things people make?

Another recent example is someone's fiance being asked to clean up hot sauce. Now this could certainly more likely actually be weaponized incompetence! The very slow movements very much says "look at me do this and fail. You should just do it next time, it's easier." But you know what it also very much says, something that is just as likely? The movements are slow because it's more than he expected and he's trying to figure it out. I struggle with this, and have gotten better with practice, but what else are you supposed to do? Sometimes there's a puddle of something and you put a paper towel on it and it absorbs but is not nearly enough. He specifically examines how full of hot sauce it is after the first soak and how much more there is. And when he starts smearing it around...how else are you supposed to avoid that? It's still cleaning it so long as the smears aren't left behind

As I said, weaponized incompetence or someone genuinely trying are both likely there. The thing is, I'm not making assumptions about it. And neither should other people. Those types of slow, unsteady movements as I figure things out are extremely common for me. I am autistic and have struggled to process physical tasks (how to accomplish things that require my body to move in a certain way, including running and jump roping etc. didn't learn how to jump rope until I was 18) my entire life. This is how I figure shit out. If someone assumed me literally doing my best to complete a task was weaponized incompetence, I'd be pissed. In fact, that happens all the time!

My mother, while I was growing up, pretty much weaponized weaponized incompetence, without using those words. She would ask me to do something. I, being an autistic child, would try my best. I'd fail or do a poor job because I'm a child. She might try a few more times with me but because I didn't get it instantly or it struggled to click she'd visibly get mad at me and tell me not to bother and that she'd just do it instead. As I got into my teens she accused me of doing things badly on purpose so I wouldn't have to do it, when the reality is she just gave up on me and asked me to do things less and less frequently with age. Then at around 16, and ESPECIALLY 18+, she started expecting me to do ALL kinds of things. Saying "you're an adult, you should know this". How? Adults know the things they do because they have experience. I don't. I've had to play such hard catch up for everything I've missed because people (not just my mom) find it easier to not bother with the disabled child.

I'm not saying the man in that video is autistic, or anything else! But what I said brings another point into play: he's an adult and simply doesn't know how to do it. That's a problem! Now why would he be an adult incapable of doing what should be a simple task he should have already learned? He wasn't taught. It reminds me of the guy who got a ton of shit online because his mom did his laundry for him all his life so when he first lived out of the house (I think with a roommate) he had to learn how to do his laundry. He wasn't refusing to do his laundry, he wasn't whining and complaining about it, he was just texting a friend about it. It would be a problem if he didn't bother to learn. If someone is LITERALLY TRYING TO LEARN HOW TO DO SOMETHING it's not weaponized incompetence! I don't care how old they are!

And honestly it does play into the whole "the patriarchy is bad for men too" situation. If a man doesn't know how to do something, such as laundry or cleaning up spills, as an adult because those jobs were always deferred to women, he is now incapable of caring for himself when alone. And then when with someone else, accused of weaponized incompetence when trying to learn by people learning new words to run into the ground. Or once again, maybe it's not a situation where he didn't learn because the women specifically always did the cleaning, he just generally might not have been taught. I don't know!

The very point I'm trying to make is that you can't make those kind of assumptions based off of a short clip, or a picture, of someone doing something poorly. Even if there's a CHANCE it could be weaponized incompetence, it is so BEYOND horrible to go on and on about how it HAS to be weaponized incompetence because no one could be that stupid. It feels awful to be a disabled person seeing people being mocked and called abusers for making the same kind of mistakes you've made. It feels awful to see something, think "oh I've messed that up too", and then see 50 different comments about how it has to be weaponized incompetence because no one could be THAT stupid

Can we please stop forgetting the existence of disabled people and people with generally different life experiences than you, thanks. There's a huge difference between weaponized incompetence and learning (or someone doing the best they can and being physically unable to do things more efficiently because of being disabled)