#and don't assume that just because *some* women like dumb shit

[minetteskvareninova]

My superpower is that I am chronically immune to caring about anything and everything regarding the Kardashians, in both positive and negative sense. I mean, people will be like "Oh, no! Modern women have Kendall Jenner as their idol instead of [insert an inspirational female figure]!!!" and my only response is "Okay, then don't be friends with those women. I manage to avoid them just fine."

[shotmrmiller]

Tormented by a Ghost

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader

TW: small mention of smut and simon being kinda mean

TY TO MY BETA FOR MAKING THIS 10X BETTER @c-h-a-r-n-i-k

Tired of living with your family, you decide to move out. There's just one problem— Rent is too costly to afford on your own. You complain about it to your friend, and they tell you that they know someone who's also looking for a roommate and preferably another female. Fantastic!

Your friend gives you her number and ya'll are moving in together by the end of the month. It was great. No nagging parents, no micromanagement, nothing. You loved it. Until your roommate brings her man over. And he's a fucking bully.

--

You're crawling home from a hard day at work, and you want nothing more than some wine on a quiet night. Unlocking the door, you step into the flat. The lights aren't turned on so you assume your roommate isn't home.

Dumping your bag in your room, you make a beeline towards the kitchen. As you're bent over in the fridge, your roommate's door opens.

"Hey,” you call out, "I'm pourin' myself a glass of wine if you're interested!"

Then an assertive, baritone voice speaks from behind you.

"You must be the roommate."

You give an ear-piercing scream as you jump, whipping around to face him with a hand over your racing heart.

"Fuckin' hell! No, it's okay, I don't need my hearin' er nothin'." he scolds.

"What the fuck! I almost flat-lined with my head in the fridge because of you!"

Then you get a good look at him. This monster of a man is a minimum 6'3, with a black balaclava covering his face, a black long-sleeve shirt, and grey sweats. You tried real hard to not ogle the tattoo that stains his exposed left arm. And the grey sweats, we all know why. Cursed be your fetish for thick forearms and big hands.

He leans his head back, looking down his nose at you.

"I think it'd be an improvement," he says, "You face down, I mean," and your eyebrows shoot up to your hairline as he chuckles.

You don't know who he thinks he is, talking to you—a complete stranger— like that but you aren't about to take his shit.

You sneer. "Fuck you. Yeah, I bet that's the view you get the most. Women willingly turn away to not get a look at your mug. Did my roommate ask you to put that mask on so she could face you during sex?"

He steps forward, his height allowing him to tower over you, and growls out, "You callin' me ugly?"

Smirking, you roll your eyes. Of course.

"I don't see any other reason for you to hide your face. Not that it matters to me— I'm not the one that has to tolerate it."

His eyes squint at you as he retorts, "I'm quite the opposite."

Opening your mouth, you're about to tell him that he can say whatever helps him sleep at night when your roommate calls out to the big brute in front of you.

"Ghost? What's taking so long?" she asks.

You tried and failed miserably to hide your mocking giggle at hearing his name, and he leers at you in response. "Go on, Ghost. You're being called back into the realm of the dead."

As he steps away, he says with contempt, "Dumb little bird doesn't know what she's talking about," before walking over to your roommate, looping his arm around her shoulders and going into her room.

He probably doesn't even know your name and he laid into you like he's hated you his whole life. After pouring yourself a glass of wine, you shake your head and walk towards your bedroom. Freak.

--

One day, after having your friend with benefits over in the morning for some nice stress relief, you walk him out. And fucking Ghost is sitting on the couch with his arms crossed. You quickly shuffle your friend out the door, face glowing with embarrassment.

Why was he here? Jesus Christ, now he's going to watch you do the walk of shame around the flat. Hopefully, he won't say anything. As you walk away from the door to the kitchen to get a bottle of water, Ghost speaks up.

"Well, that was pathetic."

You hang your head and close your eyes in resignation. Should've known someone as toxic as he wouldn't mind his own goddamn business.

"What now, Ghost?"

He sounds oddly smug as he says, "I've been here for a couple of hours, and I didn't hear anything coming out of your room. Sounds like he doesn't know what to do with a cunt."

Behind gritted teeth, you grind out, "Don't worry about my pussy, bud. You've got yours coming in," and you hold the n as you look at your watch, "30 minutes. Now piss off."

As you stomp away towards your room, the bottle of water all but forgotten, you hear him let out a deep chuckle. He's an asshole. A physically attractive one, sans the face, but still an asshole. You're going to have to get your friend to come over more often if Ghost is going to continue being around with those jacked arms and deliciously tight grey sweats.

Sucking your teeth, you make a mental note to ask your roommate why she gave him a key to your shared flat without asking.

--

A week later, your roommate has Ghost over and you figure it'd be a good time to get some action yourself. You send him a text and in less than 20 minutes, you're letting him in. Hugging him, you tell him to go to the bedroom. But he's not paying attention to you— he's looking directly behind you.

Turning around to look, it's Ghost. Goddamn it. And this time he's shirtless with his arms crossed and a skull mask on. God fucking damn it. Pulling the arm of your friend, he looks down at you and you tell him to go on, that you'll be there soon.

He nods, walking away with one last look at the phantom leaning against your roommate's door. Exhaling a ragged sigh, you turn back to Ghost.

"Can I help you?"

He shakes his head mutely before responding, "No, lovie, but I can help you." You shake your head at his nonsense.

"No. I'm not doing this with you."

You turn to walk away when he speaks again.

"Yer really gonna let him touch you again? He clearly doesn't know what he's doing— Bedroom's silent as a crypt. Even with those glasses he's got on, he can't find what he should be lookin' for."

Insulted for your friend, you face Ghost with a disbelieving look on your face.

"You're not seriously standing here trying to cockblock me. You—" his audacity has you stammering, "You have no idea what I'm like. Maybe I'm just naturally quiet in bed."

Ghost stares at you for a solid minute before he shrugs and goes back to your roommate.

Unbelievable asshole. Why does he have to look so good shirtless, the berk.

--

You start noticing that Ghost is there a couple of hours before your roommate gets there and you'd think it's weird if you weren't too busy being distracted by the fact that he's always taunting you one way or the other. And then one day, you question him on it.

"You do know your girlfriend won't be home until the evening? It's barely 3."

Ghost turns his head from the TV to look at you and grunts.

"Not my girlfriend." That's news to you.

"Then why you spendin' so much time over here? You're gonna have me thinkin' you like spending time in my delightful presence." you banter with a teasing smile.

Ghost continues to stare at you and the heated look in his eyes confuses you but then he turns back to the TV.

"I can't stand ya, ya daft bint."

You pretend you don't hear the muted tenderness in his voice.

--

And on a sunny day, it all comes crashing down. The boys are over again, but this time Ghost is boring holes into the back of your head as you both go into your respective rooms. You're straddling your boy's hips shirtless when you hear your roommate's furious yelling from the other side of the flat and then stomping towards the front door before it slams closed.

After your bedroom door is busted open, the bolt being broken out of the faceplate from the brutal strength behind the force— and you're jumping off the bed and crossing your arms over your exposed chest.

It's Ghost and he's staring directly at your friend on the bed.

"No." He stomps over to grab your friend by his shirt and drags him off the bed and towards the front door before tossing him against it with a nasty-sounding slam.

"Get the fuck out."

Your friend is spluttering when Ghost cuts him off.

"If I see you here again, I'm turnin’ those silly little glasses," and he taps a lens with his finger, "into contacts. Now get the fuck out. I won't repeat myself." And with that, he trips over his own feet running out the door.

You're standing in the living room. eyes are wide in disbelief. What just happened? There's a moment of silence before Ghost breaks it.

"Your roommate won't be coming back today." He walks over to you picks you up to sit you on the kitchen countertop and lifts his mask over his mouth.

"Now. You're going to come on my tongue before I fuck you and personally test out this 'I'm quiet' theory, pet." You look down at him and sigh.

"I think I'm gonna need a new roommate," you lament.

Pulling the gusset of your knickers to the side, he says, "Don't worry your pretty little head over that. I'll be moving in with you. Also, no. You don't have a choice."

He digs his fingers into your thigh and purrs against your skin, “If you find it in you to scream, my real name’s Simon.” 

And with the way his usually sharp tongue delicately rubs against your clit, you can't find it in you to argue.

A/N: dreamt of this and it had me in a chokehold.

[stardewvalleybut-i-draw]

Can u give me ur full thoughts on Alex? I feel like a lot of the shit he gets is unjustified. Yeah he says some sus things to the farmer (no matter what gender you are!) but that's only because he's horribly mislead. The man just doesn't know any better. I mean think about it. Abused and neglected, lacking good male role models, and he's got no friends in town except for maybe Haley and you know how she is. If she was told "you're probably not into sports" she'd say "ew no" because sports would get her all dirty.

I always saw him as just a loner-type guy who doesn't know how to talk to people. Spent too much time trying to develop his cringe ass macho man persona that he forgot to develop social skills. I don't think that makes him a bad person though. I could honestly talk for hours about how toxic masculinity is a monster that preys on young boys and eats them alive if they're not careful. But even with societal pressure being so intense, growth is possible. Alex is still a massive sweetie in my eyes. A big dumb doofus who loves his granny and wants to lift heavy things just to impress you.

I would love your thoughts though!!

#1 Alex fan anon ⚡️

Yeah. That's basically more or less my thoughts😅

It honestly depends on what you experience that can greatly color Alex's character

This might be one of my more controversial takes

(right next to being a Clint apologist💀)

but stick with me here-

If you grow up in a similar environment to most guys, you can understand why Alex is the way they are. It's not exactly easy to be soft or mindful when you have a harsh environment around you. Many guys end up coping with repressed thoughts and feelings in unique ways to soothe themselves. I think Alex's was sports. (Idk just a hunch) but it often leads to a lot of blind spots or misunderstandings of the world.

I've seen a lot of people like Alex and I've had a couple of friends in high school like that too! And I can tell you... yeah... it comes from SOMEWHERE, A lot of them ain't doing so great mentally.

Heck, I do that! Whenever I get uncomfortable with a situation or feelings I don't like, I make jokes to ease my brain. Releses a little serotonin ya know what I mean?

Not all coping mechanisms are bad tho, we kinda have our own form of bond and support that from the outside looks cold and uninviting but I promise you, we would die for our brothers. (plus the cold uninviting part is just a front)

"I know the homie told us to KYS over Roblox but he bought the group Freebirds during the gym session so it's all good!"/j

I can't say much from the other perspective but I would assume they would see Alex as a HUGE BIG RED flag and someone potentially dangerous or someone who brings back bad memories which is why he is dunked on so much. Even if they don't mean it, they have a higher chance of hurting people.

I don't think Alex is THAT type of character at all, I think he has good intentions but as you said "no social skills". I can see why others would interpret that way though.

It's funny that you mention how Alex doesn't have many female role models cuz... you have

Haley- Lazy and super not into dirt.

His mom- got sick and DIED.

Granny Evelyn- frail weak old woman who makes cookies and tends to flowers.

Those are not exactly SUPER GREAT examples of women who like sports.

Personally, I get why people say that playing a male farmer is better for Alex's story arc along with confronting George about the whole being gay thing but I think the female farmer has elements that I don't think are acknowledged much.

From my perspective anyway, I think a Fem farmer shows Alex a better example of women and what they can do VS grandma, dead mom, and Haley... along with learning boundaries and how better cope with repressed feelings and MAYBE-

-even address the fear of the farmer DYING of a sickness just like his mom or the intrusive thoughts of believing he'll end up like his father making him overprotective and paranoid about the farmers well being...

but you can ignore that...

Idk man, that's just the way I view it. You either like Alex or you don't :/

I ain't saying anyone's wrong to feel the way they do

[roosterbruiser]

𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐌𝐞

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞: 𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚 𝐉𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐀𝐊𝐀 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐭𝐨 𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

"Wait, don't--!"

His hips stutter as he throbs inside of you, anchoring you against his slick body with a painfully muscular arm. He hears you over the sound of the rushing water, over the blood rushing through his ears, over his ragged breathing.

And really, Jake isn't an asshole. Not in the ways that count, at least--especially with the women he has sex with.

So he does try to pull out as soon as he realizes that's what you mean by your unfinished sentence, the one that was strangled through your grit teeth. But the thing about that is you didn't give him much notice--granted, he shouldn't have assumed you were on birth control--and he was genuinely already partway through spilling inside you when he registered your words.

"Shit," he sighs, reeling at your sudden loss of contact.

You're pressed up against the wall still, breasts against the steamy tiles, and you're panting too.

"Shit, I'm really sorry," he apologizes, shaking his head. "I just didn't even realize what you said and by the time it registered, I--!"

You shake your head, sighing.

"Hey, it's fine," you tell him, really meaning it. "This is why God made morning-after pills."

It makes him laugh--it's a dry thing, one that is riddled with exhaustion. He's spent honestly--going from pulling 7G's to fucking you so furiously in the shower had proven to be a lot on his body.

You want to make a joke about child support or something, something dumb and inappropriate to say to a man that just accidentally came inside you the first time you had sex. But you don't say anything--you just catch your breath and so does he. It's quiet aside from the running shower and your heaving chests.

Jake leans forward and lets his body rest over yours, forehead resting against your shoulder. He's very warm--which you know is not just because of the lukewarm water raining down over the two of you. He's always warm--hot-blooded. And Jake thinks you feel very soft beneath him; he thinks that he might even like the way your skin feels pressed against his. And you both are just being still, resting in each other's arms. It's probably one of the only times the two of you have ever been in another's presence without arguing.

Before Jake even really knows what he's doing, still in that post-orgasm haze and enthralled in the absolute strangeness of just having fucked you, he presses his lips against your shoulder. At first he just kisses very softly, little things he peppers all along your naked shoulders and neck. And you don't tense at the feeling--for some reason, with your cheek agains the tile and your hair slung over your other shoulder, you're totally okay with him kissing your skin. And then he just lets his lips rest, stilling right there on the back of your neck.

And in almost total tandem, the both of you think it: this is kind of nice.

"You okay?" He asks suddenly, shooting up when he realizes that he's been kissing your skin.

You nod, eyes slipping shut.

"I think so," you whisper.

Things are different after that.

At first it's small things.

Like when Jake meets you at the pharmacy after the two of you leave base (at separate times, of course), he not only buys you Plan B but a protein bar and Gatorade, too.

"Post-coitus protein," he tells you when you look up at him with raised eyebrows.

He sits in your car as you take the pill, fiddling with your radio, looking at the interior you keep so clean. You have a strawberry air freshener in there that smells like his sisters childhood bedroom--he likes it. It's a nice evening so the windows are rolled down and the sun is setting in a blaze of orange and pink in the distance as the blinking, neon PHARMACY sign casts a red light over your face.

"Easy-peasy," you whisper, stuffing the box back in the grocery bag.

He nods, smiling softly, leaning back in your passenger seat. You're leaning back, too, tapping your fingers against the steering wheel. Your hair is still wet and the warm wind feels good when it filters through it.

"Wanna talk about it?" Jake asks.

It very nearly startles you when he says it. But when you look over at him, he's still fiddling endlessly with the radio and fixing his gaze everywhere but you.

"The sex? Or the...Plan B?"

He pulls his brows together, finally glancing up at you as a Joni Mitchell song floats through the radio. You look very soft right now--your face is naked and your damp hair is pulled back. You don't look angry at him for once and your face is open.

"Your dad," he says after a moment, swallowing hard.

It's vulnerable, really, for both of you. Jake is sitting in your car after fucking you, after buying you a protein bar and a Plan B, after splitting a lemon-lime gatorade with you, and A Case Of You is playing as he looks into your glassy eyes. And you had a breakdown--finally cracked and told someone about your father and the little time you have left with him. Then he made you cum and fucked you against the shower wall and now you're here--basking quietly in the glow of the pharmacy sign.

It's confusing, too, because up until about two hours ago, Jake Seresin was just about your least favorite person on earth. But now you think that he looks downright pretty when he's being earnest the way he is right now. And he thinks that you look beautiful, too, even with that drop of Gatorade on your bottom lip.

"Not right now," you say quietly, shaking your head.

Three hours ago, if he'd have asked, you'd have snarled at him. You probably would've hissed, "Not to you, dickhead." But things are different now. You both know it.

He's not hurt that you don't want to talk about it. He gets it--really, he does.

"Yeah, I get that," Jake says softly, trying to remain casual even though there's a strange sense of affection for your capturing every vital organs in his body. "I'm here if you...want to."

You nod, biting your thumbnail.

"Thanks," you whisper.

"And I guess, um, like for the record..." Jake says softly, scratching the back of his neck just to have something to do with his hands, "I don't think you're a bitch."

Something jolts inside of you, climbs up your chest and sits thickly in your throat. It feels strangely close to affection.

"Thank you," you whisper, biting your lip. "I don't think you're that big of a dick."

And then you're both laughing--it's the first time you two have ever really shared a laugh together. He's always heard your laugh from the other side of the room, in some conversation that he isn't a part of. Being so close to it now makes his fingers feel warm.

"I am a dick, huh?" He sighs, still smiling.

You shrug.

"You can be," you say, sighing. "But at least now I know you let ladies finish first."

He snorts softly.

"I'm a dick, not a monster."

Then you two are sharing your second laugh together. It fills your little car and nestles in snugly against your strawberry air freshener and Plan-B trash.

"Well, I've known plenty of monsters," you sigh, rolling your eyes at the mere thought of ex-boyfriend's and their ineffective fingers and short strokes.

"You're giving me a big head," Jake teases.

You smile--it's a real, genuine smile. The stretch of it on your lips feels unfamiliar. It's been a great while since you've smiled, you realize.

"I can deflate that ego anytime," you tell him, a teasing lilt in your voice. "Just give me the go-ahead when you're ready."

He takes a swig of your Gatorade. You watch him, watch his pink lips wrap around the rim, watch his throat swell as he swallows. He looks beautiful right now--partly in the afterglow and partly just because he is beautiful. That is undeniable now.

Then he offers the bottle to you--you take a drink, too.

"You like lemon-lime, right?" He asks.

He's asking fruitlessly--he knows you do. He's seen you buy it at the base vending machine more than once.

You nod. Of course you do. But he already knows that.

Another thing that changes is that he saves a seat for you. It starts the very next morning the two of you are on base together.

To the untrained eye, it would seem like nothing. But your eye isn't untrained. When you walk into the training room on Monday morning, Jake is sitting at the desk with his feet firmly planted on the floor, not in the seat beside him like they usually are. And when you slip in beside him silently, the way he was hoping you would, he glances at you from the corner of his eye.

"Mornin'," he greets quietly, chewing on a tooth pick.

You smile softly as you unpack your bag, nodding at him in greeting.

"Good morning."

He taps his knuckles on the table, trying to keep his voice steady.

"How was your weekend?" He asks.

You shrug.

"Fine. Lots of family coming in and out so...loud, I guess," you breathe. "How was yours?"

Something in his throat feels tight that you're just mentioning this fact in passing. He knows that your family is filtering in and out of your home because your father is dying--that this time must be very precious for you and yours and you're still coming into work every single day like nothing is wrong. But you're telling him this now, the only person on this base that knows about your ailing father, and it feels like you trust him. And you suppose that you accidentally kind of do trust him now--a little bit more than you did on Friday at 1 o'clock.

"Just great," he sighs.

Truth be told, he had thought of you all weekend. He was confused about the whole thing, since the two of you were sworn enemies but have now found yourselves in the no-man's-land between enemies and friends and lovers.

The next morning, the seat beside him is open again. And this time, there's a lemon-lime Gatorade waiting for you there like it's marking your spot.

And after that, it just keeps happening. Each morning, Jake somehow gets on base before you, buys a Gatorade, and leaves it at your seat. You wonder if he's spending a fortune in quarters and for about a month, he is--until he thinks better of it and just buys a pack of lemon-lime in bulk and starts bringing them from home.

Other members of the squadron notice that the two of you have seemingly formed some sort of truce, but no one is brave enough to outright ask what's happened between the two of you. Payback and Rooster sniff around wherever they can, trying to snuff out who the winner of their bet is, but you and Jake remain mum.

The next time you have sex, it's less of a surprise.

It's almost two months later--two months full of everyone dancing around the fact that your father is dying, two months of your family's door being a revolving one, two months of the stress of your recent detachment--when it all reaches a head.

You need a release and despite your better judgment a few weeks ago, you'd given Jake your phone number. Your text messages started our sporadic and random--sometimes just sending each other gossip you heard in the hangar or memes that made you think of the other. But then they'd evolved into something more constant than that recently--the two of you even catching a movie or a late dinner here or there.

So when you showed up at his door past midnight on a Saturday, almost two months since your shower encounter, he wasn't all that surprised to see you. It wasn't very odd to see each other off base now.

But what surprised him is how quickly you kissed him, walking over the threshold of his front door hastily. And he's kissing you back right away, blinking away his chock and his previous fatigue. You're ferocious in your kisses, all tongue and teeth and spit, and he's trying to keep up with you.

"Hi," he mumbles into your mouth, his voice deliciously gravelly.

"Hey," you whisper back, pulling back for a moment to behold him.

He looks good right now--scruffy and comfortable with his beard and his sweatpants low on his hips and his old band t-shirt. He's had a couple of beers and his lips taste like Stella Artois and peanuts. Before you came over, he was sitting on his couch, watching some highlight reel of a football game and putting off getting ready for bed.

And he's looking right back at you, at your pupils that are blown and your cheeks that are flushed. You are desperate for him like you were the first time the two of you touched, but it's different now. It's different because the two of you don't loathe each other--there's actually something between the two of you that resembles a friendship.

"Everything okay?" He asks quietly, his hands firmly planted on your hips as you press yourself into him and lace your fingers in his hair.

"No," you tell him honestly, biting your lip.

He wants to press you more--wants you to tell him what's wrong. He wants you to let it all out and he actually wants to listen to it because the two of you are suddenly people that care about each other. He cares about your Aunt Lisa and her bitchy comments that she makes to your mom and the way it hurts your feelings, too. He cares about your dad starting hospice last week. He cares about you skipping lunch most days--which has prompted him to start packing you bags of apples and walnuts and cheese--and he cares that you don't like red wine at all.

And you can feel that care--really, you can. Whoever the Jake was before you had sex is not the Jake that's looking into your eyes now with his brows blanched in sympathy. This Jake that's holding you genuinely wants you to be okay--this Jake hasn't tried anything sexual with you since your first encounter but is kissing you back right away.

Despite yourself and your efforts, you care about him, too. You care that he was grounded for two weeks--enough for you to have your dad talk to Cyclone and get the penalty dropped. You care that he doesn't usually get invited to group hangouts outside of The Hard Deck and have deemed yourself the official Hangman-inviter. You care that he likes rom-coms but doesn't like to admit it--so you pretend to suggest them all on your own.

"What can I do?" Jake asks, tenderly reaching up to swipe his knuckles across your cheek.

You lean into his touch, lean into his calloused fingers, and let your eyes fall shut softly.

"Fuck me," you whisper.

He nods, brows furrowed.

"I can do that," he whispers to you.

And all at once, things are happening. He's bracing his forearms beneath your ass and you're wrapping your legs around his hips. You're kissing and panting, tugging at the hems of each others shirts and leaving a trail of discarded clothing on the stairs as he carries you to his bedroom. And then he's laying you down on the bed, tugging your pants off without breaking your kiss, swallowing every precious noise that your mouth makes. He loves those sounds, loves the way they feel on his lips.

Then, after a few more minutes of kissing and petting and shedding, you're both naked.

You're lying flat on your back in his dark bedroom against his cold sheets, your eyes bleary with pleasure as he stands over you. He's naked except for the silver chain on his neck, his cock pressing thickly against his thigh. You're both flushed all over, both silently letting your eyes graze over each other's bodies.

Without another word, he reaches for you. He's careful with you as he first sinks his fingers down on your cunt--very carefully grazing your lips and gathering the wetness that has grown there. And he's just gazing down at you, treasuring that little crinkle between your brows and that twitch in the meat of your thighs. And when his fingers slip over your clit, he keens at the way your chest rises off the bed, at the way you inhale your breaths so sharply.

It feels good--like overwhelmingly good. He knows how to touch you, he knows where to touch you. All of his movements are seemingly perfectly calculated, one finger rubbing lazy circles on your clit while the other pushes into you. He's gentle, pumping at the pace you desire, bringing his other hand to his own cock to relinquish some of the tension that has risen there.

There's no haste. You two still very obviously want each other, you two are still very obviously desperate for each other, but you're not in the locker-room on base anymore. You're here in Jake's dark bedroom and he's savoring every moment that his fingers are buried in you.

"Jake," you whisper, clenching his sheets.

"I know, baby," he coos softly, squaring his jaw as he picks up his pace just slightly, "I know. I'll get you there."

His words alone are making you quake, making your toes curl. But everything he's doing just feels so good, so perfect. You know you must be absolutely slick with anticipation, that his fingers are more than enough to push you over the edge. He knows this, too--which is why he stops suddenly.

"What--?" You pant, sitting up on your elbows.

But Jake is just pressing his fingers against your mouth, the ones that had just been inside of you. And you're taking them without hesitation, a mutual sense of trust aiding in your malleability.

His eyes are dark as he watches you suck his fingers clean of your arousal, as you swirl your tongue along his fingertips. But they're not dark in a way that frightens you--they're lustful and adoring.

So when he lowers to his knees, when he hooks your knees over his shoulders and scoots you to the end of the bed, you don't shy away from him. You lay back on the bed, kiss each of his fingers and let them settle against your right nipple, and blink up at his ceiling.

When his tongue first circles your clit, you cry out, back arching off the bed. And because his hand is already there, he lets his palm lie flat in the middle of your chest, and pushes you back down against the mattress.

You taste just like he thought you would, very sweet and earthy on his tongue, and he can't think of any other place that he would rather be than hear between your quivering legs. He lets his tongue run across your slick folds and settle comfortably on your silky clit, lapping at it languidly as you writhe above him.

"Jake, that's so good," you manage to whimper, gasping as he hums against you.

"Want you to cum," he mumbles against you. "Cum for me, Wisty."

You're mewling, grasping for anything to hold you down to the bed as an impossibly tight coil springs in your belly. You can hardly catch your breath, can hardly keep your hips from bucking, when he reaches out to take your hands. It's a simple gesture, one that anyone in the world could do, but you are grateful for it. You dig your nails in his skin and he just holds you right back.

Maybe it's the sheer intimacy of it all that pushes you over the edge finally--or maybe it's because Jake is just that damn good with his tongue--but you nearly black out when you cum.

And because he cares about you, because he really does want you to feel good and be good, he coaxes you through it all. He holds your hands tight, keeps a flat palm to your chest so you don't come completely off the bed, laps up every bit of your nectar without overstimulating you.

And then he kisses his way up your legs, over your precious thighs and hips, all up your belly and between your breasts. Then he kisses up the column of your throat, nipping very lightly, bringing his hands to softly knead your breasts.

When his face finally hovers yours, when you're blinking up at him with bleary and glassy eyes and wet eyelashes and bitten lips, he feels like he's going to blurt something out that he might regret any other time.

"That was...nice," you whisper, voice trembling.

Truthfully, that was the best orgasm you've ever had.

"Nice, huh?" He laughs that pretty laugh, carefully pressing your hair behind your ears and letting his hand linger against your cheek.

"Didn't want you to get a big head," you meekly answer, smiling weakly.

The smile that tugs on his lips is one of utter fondness--one that usually prefaces sweet nothings. So you lean up and press your mouth on his, your lashes fluttering shut in tandem. The kiss is slow and sweet, very different than the clashing of tongue and teeth downstairs.

He slowly lowers his bare body on top of yours, pressing every surface of his skin against you, letting his cock rest against your hip. It feels good just to be this close to each other, just to be kissing each other with such sweetness.

"I really like you," Jake murmurs against your mouth.

And even if he's had a couple of beers, he knows that's not why he says it. He says it because he means it, because his cock is pressing against you, because he can still taste you on his tongue.

You thought your head would be spinning in this post-orgasm euphoria, but it's not. You feel everything is crystal clear as you rest your forehead against Jake's, as you swipe your thumbs cross his cheek softly. Affection is sitting very heavy on your body now, similar in weight to Jake.

"I really like you, too," you whisper.

You two have the good sense to use a condom this time, which hardly interrupts the flow of things, not when your blood is running so hot for each other.

He hovers you, relishing in the feeling of your legs coming up to wrap around his hips, relishing in your skin beneath his palms and your half-lidded eyes looking up into his. He's lined himself up perfectly, desperate to feel your warm walls around him, but then he pauses and stills--just like last time.

He reaches down, less hesitant than he was before, and lets his hand rest on your cheek. If you were another girl, one he didn't know very well, maybe he'd press his thumb into your mouth and have you suckle as he fucked you. But he merely strokes the soft skin of your cheek. And then you turn just slightly, just enough to press your lips against the pad of his thumb in the most tender kiss he's ever been given.

"You want this?" He asks, his voice strained.

You nod, leaning into his touch. Jake feels like no one has ever trusted him enough to lean into the palm of his hand like this--it feels good. It feels really, really good.

"Yes," you whisper quietly. "I want you."

𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭: 𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐦

that gif is my entire note. that's all. I'm deceased. goodbye now, world.

here is my tag list!!

also would the world want another part of this?? maybe when iceman...dies...or something angsty like that?

[mixelation]

absolutely DUMB reborn au minato concept

consider. he goes to ninjacon. he gets a taste of the non-hokage life. he has a midlife crisis. he needs more. kushina supports him. he deserves to do fun things no matter how insane he's acting

minato: what if i came with you to the anbu party 👀

kakashi: wh

kakashi: what

it takes a forty-seven step insane plan that involves tricking his own anbu with a kage bunshin and then disguising himself. minato's go-to disguise is a young woman bc most people just don't think men will do this

kakashi: (sees it)

kakashi: yeah if i hang out in public with you people will Assume things that will make me go insane. please go to tori

minato: (basically just naruto's sexy jutsu but with clothes)

tori: ......this has already driven me insane

tori is like "no i ALREADY explained this, people will think you're hitting on them just because you have tits in public" and minato is like "dw i used to get hit on all the time before i was hokage!! i'm used to it" and tori has a vivid flashback to him being hit on at ninjacon and both her and kakashi having extreme "BUT THAT'S MY DAD*?" reactions and she's like. you're wrong but actually i cannot continue this conversation without frothing at the mouth

anyway!! he learns that people really DO just say insane shit to young women!! some of the insane shit is just rumors about tori? some of it is just not real. some of it he's like who told you this. it's very educational

meanwhile tori is like. why am i the one managing the hokage's midlife crisis. and everyone is like "because you caused it" BUT SHE DIDN'T

[prettyboykatsuki]

pls read me for filth bestie: intj eldest daughter 🤓

ahhh. fellow intj. this one might be mean sorry. once again i am working on assumptions so disclaimer yadda yadda

intjs are usually known for being cold, calculated and intelligent as a result of introverted intution which is shared with your fellow NJ pairs and for the most part this stereotype is true. most intjs are gifted in early childhood and do well academically with good insight for pattern recognition. youve probably one point felt yourself to be better than your peers

the two way consequence of this being true is that you definitely have semi abysmal social skills. intj women(or just generally speaking fem presenting intjs) tend to make-up for this by capitalizing on their physical appearance in their later years if possible. intj men tend to be mildly insufferable because behaving that way is accepted as masculine and tolerable. this lack of understanding in relation to socialization comes two fold from your last function being extroverted sensing and your third function being introverted feeling.

like most introverted feelers you take things incredibly personal which wreaks havoc in your relationships. as you grow older and experience more things (and more trauma) your sense of basic sympathy allows you to overlook the things that you used to bother you day-to-day but you do have to actively realize that not everything that happens to you is a personal matter. in fact most things are not and your paranoia that they are worsens greatly under stress. a lot of shit has genuinely nothing to do with you

intjs are interesting in that they do actually get along with several types of people and tend to fall in the camp of open minded. you have a tendency to make quick judgements about people and you're rarely wrong on your first impressions but you sometimes allow them to cloud your judgement. you don't prefer leadership roles but you will handle them well when they are forced upon you which they often are as a result of you being technically competent and talented at compartmentalizing. how are u dealing with that one haunting impulsive decision you made btw

most often intjs get in relationships they can hide behind in some way. extroverts are ideal for this but it's mostly anyone who can comfortably shield them away from public scrutiny as they pressure of being around others is rather annoying to you though im sure you do fine. you've developed some specific culturally relevant social skills to keep you afloat but you need to recuperate more oftne than you care to admit.

you probably similarly had a phase of total hedonism in your late teens and young adulthood in a way that wasn't obvious to everyone else as you discovered your extroverted sensing and the concept of sensuality.

you have inadvertently developed a desire for validation of something you can't actually recognize. intjs are typically well accomplished in some aspect, but the validation you're seeking is actually entirely emotional and you will benefit a lot from realizing this. your ideal relationship is not someone who will simply shield you, but will allow you to be yourself and push you in areas you need pushing while fully understanding who you are and not who you are very good at pretending to be.

its fine to admit some parts of you are sloppy, irritable and irrational. the extremity you treat his part of yourself with is overblown in the first place and being around emotionally in tune people makes you self aware of this.

you date people you assume you'll have emotional control over and years later understand doing that is also exhausting you. the cycle will repeat until you can find someone who can view you with sincerity and all your flaws and acknowledge them without stepping on your toes about them all the type.

you can pretend that happy-go-lucky people exhaust you all you want but having at least SOME to balance you out is literally important to your nervous system. if dating a dumb himbo and the false sense of emotional security he gives you is what fixes you let it happen its fine no one else will be able to tell but them.

despite all of this, ultimately no one is harder on you than yourself which is why many people in your life forgive you for things most others would not. your expectations for your accomplishments as a result of your talents and somewhat your ambition suffocate you but your health is more important and it's fine to put those thoughts to rest eventually. not everything needs to happen at once for you

try not to let your perfectionism completely disconnect you from the one artistic hobby you have and work hard at that - it contributes more to your sanity than u will ever give it credit for and it is that deep. u can't pretend its not lol

it will be fine btw

[obsessionatthemoment]

White women wanna be oppressed sooooo badly 🙄 Yes fetishizing a ship on tumblr is just like being a victim of the satanic panic

To the people who are seeing this that didn't write the anon: sorry, this post is going to be a little harsh. It made me very angry and hit a sore spot. Just keep in mind that everything I say is directed toward the anon. (I don't think I say anything mean, I just set some boundaries.)

First of all, there are a lot of homophobes who make rude comments about byler and their shippers because they're a queer couple, so it's not out there for me to comment on it. Second of all, I am absolutely not fetishizing byler. They are my hyperfixation and my coping skill, which is what my brain has learned to do, so I can cope in a world that's not designed for me as a neurodivergent person. I often fixate on queer ships because I myself am queer. Third of all, sexism is still a thing… you know that right. The fact that you specifically targeted women in your ask is honestly sexist in and of itself. Why are women always being called out when we like a queer ship? Why specifically women and not any other gender? Because I know for a fact that byler shippers are not all women. In fact, we aren't even close to all women.

Yes, I am white, and I recognize that that means I have privileges that other people don't get. I very much don't want to come across as saying I am as oppressed as people of color are. I don't get to even act like I know what some people go through. There are varying degrees of oppression, and I would likely fall on a very low end. That does not mean I have not faced oppression, though, and to not acknowledge this is frankly ableist.

I am an autistic woman in a world that is designed for neurotypical men. I have severe and debilitating mental illness. Did you know, I haven't been home for more than a couple of months at a time in 4 years because I have been in and out of hospitals and residential? You didn't know, because you don't know me, yet you're making hurtful assumptions. My life has been stripped away from me, and you're over there saying I want to be oppressed.

It's so dumb that whenever you say something difficult that you go through on the internet, it's straight to “oh, you want to be oppressed.” Why would anyone want to be oppressed?

Also, I only said that SCENE was fitting for byler. I didn't say satanic panic was comparable to byler. I only mentioned that the scene was about satanic panic so people would know which scene I was referencing.

The fact that you assumed things about me when I have shared little about myself is very frustrating. You don't get to assume my intentions when you've never even spoken to me.

Don't talk about shit you don't know. Stop making assumptions, it makes you look clueless. You don't know me, and you don't know what I've been through. So kindly back off. Thanks!

[synnthamonsugar]

Sending an ask instead of commenting because I prefer to keep discourse away from my blog. but, I have to get some of this off my chest. it's bound to be lengthy, so don't feel like you have to read/respond. you just seem like maybe you'll get my point. Read this as one big I statement because of course it's my opinion and I'm not out here reading everyone's minds.

On that last post. I think a lot of people have gone and manic-pixie-dream-girl'd Eris beyond recognition, and that some of shippers (not all, ofc) have spent so much time with their own headcanons & fanfic that they've forgotten how their real dynamic is. It's easy to project a relationship onto them if you're already looking for one. People see them bicker and go "aw, they're arguing like an old married couple!" when, no. They're just arguing.

Drifter definitely flirts with her, but she doesn't reciprocate and I don't even think that it's necessarily serious. That man would flirt with a wall if he thought it would be funny. He seems like the type to tease people that way regardless of gender or attraction to them.

I don't deny that there's something between them. knowing the lore as I do I think it's safe to say that they're somewhat close, whatever that can even mean for either of them, but for fucks sake close isn't always romantic. Are they friends? Maybe. Can either of them have friends at their level of stability? I genuinely don't know. I don't think that we've been given enough to go off of, honestly. I don't like the idea that they're going to magically have their trauma cured by dating each other. She doesn't need him to "file down her teeth", and I don't think that he would. He definitely seems to benefit from her input, though. I don't feel like their relationship is very balanced in that. There's plenty of lore to back up him getting and using advice from her, and it being helpful to him, but I haven't seen much the other way around. He's immature in a way that she isn't, and people seem to think she's going to settle for that.

I don't care who people ship or what their headcanons are, that's all their own business. If I don't like it, it's not like I'm going off on their blogs in the space they've made themselves about why I don't agree with them. I prefer to just back off a bit, let them have their space and I'll have mine. But I don't always see that respect going both ways, and it starts to really bother me when people try to project their headcanons onto other blogs and onto the developers. Almost anything I see of them independently, it seems someone has to show up with "but where's [the other one]", and I've seen shippers go after multiple people for asking that their fanart of the two isn't tagged as ship art. It's just overstepping at that point.

Of course, I don't like lumping a bunch of people under the single label of drifteris shippers and calling them all a problem, I'm well aware that it's probably a loud minority silent majority type situation and I'm not going to assume someone's like that just because that's their content. But a lot (that I've seen) are.

On the misogyny part, I've definitely seen it in some. I'm a guy, so I'm probably not going to have the world's best explanation of why, but what gets to me is mostly the over-romanticism of Eris as his quirky goth gf. It's dumb and often comes off as objectifying. Sometimes it's like people think she's some edgy egirl twitch streamer. I find it strange how much fanart of her changes her appearance too, given we can barely actually see her. And sometimes it winds up painting Drifter as this douchy dudebro that he just isn't. One of the best things about his character to me is that he has his attitude without the shit treatment of women that comes along with it with most similar characters in games. I don't understand the need to turn around and twist him into someone that pushes her boundaries, which is pretty necessary to read their arguments as flirting.

I don't know what else to say, it's late and I'm tired and I'll probably feel stupid for letting myself get wrapped up in fandom discourse but I might as well say it while the conversation is happening.

(adding in case you do post this) v

No shade to shippers that don't fit the description I've put here. If you're reading this and go "Hey! I don't do that!" then obviously I don't mean you. You're all just doing what makes you happy and, hey, go for it. Tumblr is a great place for that. It's only an issue (imo) when that crosses the line into expecting everyone else to have the same headcanons or ignore what is canon. Go make art and fanfic and whatever you want, there's plenty of people who will appreciate it. I'm glad the positive side of the ship fanbase helps boost both of their stories, I hope it winds up driving Bungie to put more content in of them, together or apart.

Thank you for the thoughtful message Anon. Honestly I cosign all of this and wish I could respond to each of your points, but will at least try to cover a few of the ones that hit most with me.

Replies under the cut, since this is a long one ...

I think a lot of people have gone and manic-pixie-dream-girl’d Eris beyond recognition

I've thought about this for awhile. Eris is frequently written as a Manic Pixie Dream Girl insofar as being the offbeat catalyst for a jaded man's journey to a better version of himself.

He seems like the type to tease people that way regardless of gender or attraction to them.

Whether you ship them or not, it's odd seeing Drifter's canon characterization as a recklessly charismatic flirt lost in fanon. That special significance is placed on his flirtation with Eris, and not with the Guardian, Orin, Efrideet, or Rahool, or the others I'm probably forgetting.

Of course, the Guardian is a blank slate the player can project motives onto, and the others are characters whose interactions with Drifter are limited to lore. His & Eris' interactions stand out. That still doesn't mean it's inherently romantic; I've platonically flirted, held hands, snuggled, danced, bed-shared, and other things fans would dedicate thousands of words of shipfic to were I a fictional character.

Though reading it as such is fine (and I'll concede, probably lines up with the authors' intent, since we know some of them are shippers), nothing in the lore is explicitly romantic. Note, authorial intent, word-of-god and canon are all separate things, as much as fandom conflates them.

An aside, it's interesting how fanon surrounding Drifter paints him as socially anxious, touch starved, romantically awkward ... until he meets Eris. While I understand the utility in shipping — to emphasize the One True Love aspect since serial monogamy, much less polyamory, is unknown to most, especially F/M, shippers — it also comes off as "did not read the lore" at best, and "perpetuating negative stereotypes about Asian men" at worst.

Can either of them have friends at their level of stability? I genuinely don’t know.

This is why Eris' and Drifter's dynamic peaked in Arrivals & Beyond Light. The tenuousness of their alliance, the acceptance and rejection of each other's flaws, the trust between them that wasn't earned but necessary to survive. It was fun, tense and compelling and I wish more of the fandom focused on this era of their relationship.

I don’t like the idea that they’re going to magically have their trauma cured by dating each other.

Cosigned. The idea that love can mend any wound, heal any trauma, or fix any flaw is textbook amatonormativity, and has unfortunate implications when applied to Eris' story. I shouldn't have to detail why "woman overcomes trauma with the affection of a man" leaves a bad taste in my and many other fans' mouths, especially when it's favored over her longer-standing relationships with other characters. Why is her bond with Ikora ignored? Zavala? Asher? Mara? Why is so much of her growth pinned on one man, when there are other, deeper relationships that have existed since practically the beginning of Destiny's narrative? Why is there so little shipping surrounding Eris and these other characters?

Almost anything I see of them independently, it seems someone has to show up with “but where’s [the other one]”, and I’ve seen shippers go after multiple people for asking that their fanart of the two isn’t tagged as ship art.

I don't typically engage with popular Destiny ships, but I draw Mara Sov frequently. By herself, and, frequently, in non-Marasjur pairings. Not once have I gotten a "Where's Sjur?" comment, or even a "Where's Shaxx?" for that matter, as pushy as the "helmet stayed on" bros are. Meanwhile, I expect these comments when posting Eris art, particularly Eris F/F. I've had this happen in art I've drawn of her and Drifter with a disclaimer that the art is platonic/not to tag as ship! At that point it's not misunderstanding, it's entitlement.

I don’t like lumping a bunch of people under the single label of drifteris shippers and calling them all a problem

Agreed. I'm technically an Eris/Drifter shipper in the sense of consuming and producing art & fic for them, though I've pulled back from interacting with that part of the fandom because [waves hands generally]. I have no issues with drifteris as a ship, nor enmity drifteris shippers as a whole, but the individuals who engage in rude behavior.

what gets to me is mostly the over-romanticism of Eris as his quirky goth gf.

I'm going to repost what @/unsaelig said, since it's a salient point:

"I have no actual way of proving this, but given how much it’s been a staple, for the past 9 years, to speak of Eris as an unpleasant, unstable, worrying, suspicious individual, and given how much people like to fixate on how Eris & Drifter’s dynamic “softens” her and makes her more palatable and conventional, I do strongly feel Drifter is probably brought up with her as a “package deal” so often because in their eyes he “defangs” her & makes her much easier to take."

I do think there's a popular fandom read on Drifter as a funny, quirky guy who's a little out-of-pocket, an edgier fandomified-and-flanderized Cayde-6, if you will, and that Eris has to naturally follow by being an inoffensively gothy dommy mommy. It's perplexing, it's objectifying, and it makes me wonder what people are actually shipping them for if they sand down their characterization so much.

I don’t understand the need to turn around and twist him into someone that pushes her boundaries, which is pretty necessary to read their arguments as flirting.

The misogyny - amatonormativity combo again. Before anyone comes for me because I like enemies-to-lovers: sword-fighting your beloved to the death over a pit of lava isn't normalized, but saying that boys who bully girls are "just flirting" is. "I hate my wife", "I wish my husband was dead" and "ol' ball and chain" 'jokes' are. The patriarchy instructs men to disrespect women, and tells women to be flattered by the disrespect of men because at least you're receiving a man's attention. It's neither cute nor funny, and I equally dislike it when empoweringly reversed so that the man is the target of the insult.

No shade to shippers that don't fit the description I've put here. If you're reading this and go "Hey! I don't do that!" then obviously I don't mean you.

Cosigned completely. I know I have reputation as an arch-hater, but I have nothing but respect for people who are shipping them in ways that don't play into tired stereotypes of M/F relationships. (Or misogyny, or racism, or...)

Sometimes I wonder if I should try to put more good Eris/Drifter out there, but most of the time I fear I would only be stemming the tide; I am just one person with limited resources, and there is so much out there that my work will go unnoticed and my time is better spent boosting small ships that need the help.

Mostly I wish there was more focus on Eris and Drifter as individuals, in the game and in the fandom, further exploration of their bonds with other characters, and an environment where a wider range of gen and ship fic/art could flourish.

[fuck-customers]

Guess who got radicalized at her Malwart job today?! This girl. ✋(Sorry this is kinda long, tw transphobia?)

I am a cis girl, but I kinda look like a dude. I'm fat but practically flat chested, I don't wear makeup, and when I wear my long hair up I get called dude and sir a lot. It doesn't really bother me, and most people realize their mistake when they hear my voice or notice my long hair (why long hair=automatic girl idk, but whatever). Even my name could be a boy or a girl's, so it doesn't help people's confusion.

I'm a cart returner at Malwart. The other day I had to go to the bathroom, and rather than walk through the whole store to the employee restrooms in the back, I just used the ones near the entrance. No one was inside when I came in, so I went in a stall and did my business. Even sat on my phone watching videos and playing games for a while because fuck the corporate overlords. While I was in there, I heard a mom and a kid come in. Mom was struggling to help them pull their pants down and go potty, kid was fussing and probably in need of a nap. I don't think anything of it and kept playing games on my phone till I got bored and finished up.

When I left the stall mom and kid were at the sink, and mom whipped her head around to look at me like I had just jumped out and yelled BOO! Whatever, I assume she just didn't know anyone else was in there with her. I give her a smile and go wash my hands. "Excuse me," I hear her say to my left. Again, I don't think anything of this, I just assume she's talking to the kid. I dry my hands and leave. "Ex-CUSE me!" I hear behind me as I leave. I turn around and she's followed me out of the bathroom, tugging the grumpy kid along.

Her: Why were you in the ladies restroom?

Me, confused: Pardon?

Her: You were in the LADIES room!

Me, still confused: ...Yes?

Her: The MENS room is RIGHT THERE!

Me, having a realization: Ma'am what are you implying?

Her: Don't play dumb with me! You were in there with me and my CHILD!

Me: Yes, I was PEEING.

Her: In the WOMENS room! You're DISGUSTING!

She's shouting and people are staring at this point, and a member of asset protection (security basically) comes over. Unfortunately, I still look like a dude, and I don't know this particular coworker.

Security: Is there a problem ma'am?

Her: This MAN was just in the ladies room with me and my CHILD! I didn't know Malwart employed GROOMERS.

Me: Holy shit I was in a STALL and I left as soon as-

Security: Why didn't you go to the employee bathroom?

Me: It's at the back of the store!

Security: Well, I'm just saying, people like you should know you make people uncomfortable.

Me: I'M making people uncomfortable?! And SHE came in after ME! I didn't FOLLOW HER in there!

This went on for a few more minutes till security called for a manager to deal with ME, because I was the problem apparently. Thankfully the manager did know me, and helpfully informed them "She's a woman and she's worked here for 8 years you idiot." The security guy ran off with his tail between his legs and the manager let me go back to my job while she tried to calm down the lady.

Later that same manager came to me and said "Why didn't you just tell her you're a woman?" and I said "Would that have mattered to her? She would have assumed I meant I'm a transwoman anyway. Her mind was made up about me," and the manager just shook her head and said "You just made the whole situation worse"

I made the situation worse. I was harassed just because of what I look like, and I made the situation worse. I gotta admit I used to be pretty "well I can understand why some people would be uncomfortable" about trans people, but now? Fuck transphobes. Fuck ANYONE who would treat someone like shit just because of what they look like.

@staff I HATE the new text editor!

[shadycomputerpolice]

My advice to separatists

The woman in the above video used to be in an abusive marriage and escaped. In this video, she explains that abuse victims only leave when they themselves are ready. So straight from the horse's mouth, most efforts to get abused women get out those situations are futile.

The dynamics between men and women as a class mirror the dynamics of an abusive relationship. Just like how abuse victims leave only when they are ready to leave, women will only leave men as a class alone only when they are ready.

This is why on this blog, for as long as I can remember, I have always discouraged seperatists from trying to convince women to give up men because just like most abuse victims, they completely ignore you or they make you the villian: evil lesbian (eventhough straight seperatists exist) that is trying to steal them away from their prince charming for your own sexual benefit.

Leave these women alone, offline and online. They are not ready and to be honest, most of them will never be. Stop going on their posts to debate them, matter of fact I suggest you block the ones who are lying about the epidemic of seperatists bullying OSA women (again denying the existence of straight seperatists to create a narrative). I understand the human instinct to clear your reputation but this is Tumblr. It is important to remember that the "loss of good reputation" on here absolutely has no impact on the quality of our lives. Yes, in the short term, you will be upset but you will quickly get over it because it has no impact on your long term life.

Just like offline you can tell when an abuse victim is ready to actually leave and just needs guidance and some resources, you can also do that online. While it is definitely harder to read people's behaviours online, it is not possible. For those of you who still take Tumblr activism seriously, you can guide genuinely interested women to valuable resources.

FYI, We need to STOP assuming that just because a person is in radfem spaces, that they are smart or have critical thinking skills. Most people come to radfem spaces because of the anti-transactivism and sometimes anti-porn positions. Contrary to what transactivism would have you believe, one doesn't need to have a pHD in human biology to differentiate between human males and females. That is actually common sense that has existed for a centuries or even millenia. Just because someone knows men cannot become women doesn't make an intellectual. That is like saying a person brushing their teeth makes them an intellectual because some people don't brush their teeth. Furthermore, phD holders can know a lot in their subject area and be clueless in others [A person can be absolutely smart in one area and completely dumb in another].

Many of people on here are actually not smart and you can tell by the dumb shit they confidently say. You shouldn't waste your time arguing with dumb people, offline or online.

[marley-manson]

Finally watched the Xena finale, thanks to the fanon episode order treating it as a midseason soft finale that gets fixed by When Fates Collide lol.

And man, it really was a hot mess. I could barely follow the plot, and many aspects were very arbitrary and like, revealed off-screen. The most hilarious of course being Xena suddenly announcing, like a minute before the end of the episode, that oh actually apparently she has to stay dead, sorry Gab, xoxo

It is VERY Xena though to have a plotline where Xena anticlimactically dies in the pre-credits scene at the beginning of part 2 and both you and the characters assume for the rest of the episode that she's going to come back to life like usual until the tragic twist lol.

Akemi was... resoundingly mediocre as one of Xena's exes. Her only personality traits were 'proto-Gabrielle' and 'wants to kill her dad.' Also like... was there incest subtext there? Like it was implied that the little creepy afterlife she was in was like, her dad's ghosts' personal brothel or something? But like I said, the plot was very hard to follow.

The themes were also a mess of course, it's been said many times but yeah ignoring the central theme of the show (atonement is pointless if you're doing good now) in favour of redemption thru death was dumb, the set up was dumb (we're blaming Xena for 40k deaths because she set a couple dudes on fire in self defense? Man at least give me an actual deliberate atrocity here), and choosing death over Gabrielle was like a dumb reverse Ides of March. Also Gabrielle just going like, 'damn okay I guess, bye forever,' was unbelievable. Even if Xena wants to backslide, I'm pretty sure Gabrielle would force her to come back to life anyway, fuck those souls. Like, it's not even clear how Xena's death helps them? Killing Akemi's evil dad again freed them from torment or whatever, who cares if they don't get avenged? What is a state of grace? How will they be lost, if she comes back to life? People go unavenged all the time, deal with it.

That said, I'd been under the impression that somehow Xena's death here contradicts the whole reincarnation thing, but I didn't get that at all? Idt there's any stipulation that she has to stay in the Japanese afterlife, just that she has to be killed and stay dead, and it does make sense since in their next lives Xena is a lot older than Gabrielle, so she should logically die a few decades earlier.

On the more positive side of things, it was very fun to see Gabrielle shining as ~the new Xena~ Love to see her kicking that one dude's ass twice, and the moment she catches the chakram is super cool. The non-Xena chakram-catch has always been framed as an 'oh shit, this woman's gonna be hardcore as hell' moment in the show so I love that they use it to show how far Gab's come.

And of course, gay gay gay homosexual gay. Like, season 6 is the point where I would say it is textual if only the show didn't go out of its way to scream "IT'S STILL AMBIGUOUS" a couple times lol (reporter's question in You Are There, fans in Soul Possession saying "yay Xena and Gabrielle are finally together" when they hear Harry and Mattie are married, eg.) "If I only had thirty seconds to live, this is how I'd want to spend them: looking into your eyes. I love you, Gabrielle." Like goddamn. I appreciate this cast and crew so much. Plus the incredibly thinly veiled makeout scene <3

Finally, while I think her chatting with Xena at the very end was meant to be more metaphorical or symbolic rather than literally Gabrielle talking to herself, it was an unfortunately funny image and a pretty terrible final scene imo. I do like the 'I hear they're in need of a girl with a chakram' reprise though, I gotta admit. Go kick some ass babe <3

And despite very much not liking that Xena dies in the finale, I would still read/watch the shit out of Gabrielle's now-single adventures as a just-as-invincible gay hero, kicking ass, fucking women without ever settling down with anyone, telling stories about Xena and becoming even more famous herself.

[damnfandomproblems]

This is the person who wrote fandom problem 3657 about gn!readers

Love how everyone assumed I hate gn/nb!reader fics rather then taking five seconds to think and realize that I hate the fact no one tags them -_-

I'm not mad that people are making gn!reader fics--make them all you want, if if makes you happy then hell yeah keep doing it--I'm mad that they won't show and ounce of consideration and just tag the fucking thing as a gn or nb!reader! I have to fight every goddamn day to get people use she/her for me because people will constantly undermine my gender and use they/them instead as a way to advoid fully calling me a women, so yeah, they/them pronouns being used to refer to me in any way is triggering because they are used to constantly to misgender me!

I am not asking people to stop making gn!readers, I am asking people to tag them! How the hell does me complaining about people not tagging their shit correctly in anyway make me a bad guy?

"Oh you're a loser!" HOW!? I JUST WANT TO BE ABLE TO READ X READERS WITHOUT GETTING SUICIDAL BECAUSE NO ONE WARNED THAT THIS WAS OR TAGGED IT AS A GN!READER!!!

WORSE YET SOME PEOPLE WILL PURPOSEFULLY TAG IT AS A FEM AND/OR MASC READER BECAUSE IT CAN "be read either way" or "it's gn so it's technically both"!!! How the hell am I suppose to avoids those!?!?! Why should I be expected to magical know and avoid those fics rather then the writers being expected to just tag it as a gn!reader???

"Oh but how do you keep reading so far in if it causes you dysphoria" a causally use of they or them is fine, but once I realize that's all that is being used, I feel like stupid idiot who just been misgendered for the past X minutes that I was reading and was too fucking dumb to realize it, and that is what makes me dysphoric! It's the realization itself that cause the dysphoria, not the actually reading of it!

I lost count of how many times i went into a fem!reader x fem character tag only to realize that it's actually a gn/nb!reader x fem character fic and get so upset (because y'know dysphoria is inherently a nonsense but extreme uncontrollable feeling but go off on how I'm over reacting, it really helps /tone tag:fuck you), and have to go on a walk so I don't hurt myself because I despite looking into the fem!reader tag, blacklisting nb/gn!reader tags, I still got some prick decided to post their gn!reader fic untagged and unwarned in the fem!reader tags because its "inclusive"

Guess transfems who have dysphoria over being misgendered with they/them pronouns constantly shouldn't be reading x readers though, my fucking bad. how dare I want people to just tag their shit correctly though, so lame and selfish and weak of me. So fucking lame and childish of me for not feeling included in these 100% amazing "inclusive" fics and wanting them to be tagged

Fuck all the pricks who help confirmed my beliefs on how fandom refuses to accept "undesirable" queers. God forbid not every trans person is comfortable with they/them

Just fucking tag your gn/nb!readers, I'm not a bad person for wanting that

And in advance, double fuck you to anyone who still wants to agrue about how inclusive gn!readers are and that it isn't a big deal when they're untagged because they're so super duper inclusive even though they are often dysphoria inducing and unavoidable when not tagged. shit in your hand and swallow it asshole

Posting since this is a response to a previous problem.

[randomnameless]

My husband came up with this idea that made me see Ionius in a slightly different way: Edelgard mentions that the Empire "demands many heirs" in her Goddess Tower support w/ Byleth, hence why Ionius had a load of kids by different women. Normally I'd think "wow that's stupid, way to invite a power struggle after you're dead" but what if it's actually an Empire tradition? Like, Ionius maybe is the first Emperor in a while to try to consolidate power but maybe only one of many to have a ton of kids, AND the reason is not only to have a kid with a Crest, but that the Slitherers practice Crest experimentation on each generation of heirs with the hope of creating a two-crested Nemesis clone to help them kill off the Nabateans. Ionius just happened to be the survivor of his batch of siblings. Maybe having 10-11 kids is to make sure that some of them will live long enough to be the next Emperor, and that's why the "Empire demands many heirs."

Oh!

FWIW, the Index of Imperial Nobility mentions how House Vestra is supposed to "coordinate things such as Imperial Consorts", adding to that how House Vestra has been at the Hresevelgs' back since the danw of the Empire, yeah, we can make a pretty good case that Adrestia has a long standing tradition of, uh, imperial consorts and all.

It can be seen as dumb because it invites power struggles, but it avoids the issue that could very well have happened with the Kingdom, aka Dimitri ded = the King's direct line is dead and it's chaos because one of the first duties of a King/Emperor/Leader under those kinds of hereditary systems is, well, to secure a heir - the lineage cannot be broken!

(that's where we usually have sekrit heirs popping up from nowhere in some kinds of stories, or bastard children !)

Having multiple Consorts - thus a large number of heirs - makes it sure that the line will not be broken as easily as, idk, a baby choking on a pretzel or a serious flu.

However, as Hanneman mentions in Hubert's support, having dozens of consorts means creating dozens of families who suddenly have to get some privileges bcs the Emperor is figging their daughters - and depending on how powerful those families are, if the Emperor obviously favors one kid over the others (or pisses on one over the others) one of those families might not be happy and start shit in the Empire - taking more and more consorts means shaving little by little the power of the Emperor in Adrestia!

(and guesses who spearheads the insurrection? Arundel, one of those "consort kin"!)

The topic of Ionius' 11 children is sadly forgotten by the plot - but iirc Word of God said the Ordelias (Lysithea) were experimented upon as a test, and when the Agarthans had, uhhh, conclusive results, they experimented on the Hresvelgs.

Given who was in charge when Ordelia was ran over by Adrestia - even if no character mentions the consequences or make a link because you have tea bags to sell - imo it would totally make sense that Ionius killed two birds with one stone : flexing his underdeveloped muscles at peons who helped people who dared to betray him, and getting guinea pigs for his plans to get the strongest Emperor ever.

Bear in mind that the Ordelia fuckery was done before the Insurrection aka, Ionius had this plan before Ludwig'n'co decided to depose him!

(Was Vestra aware of what was going on? Who were the Agarthans working with Ionius? Is it a situation à la Manfroy'n'Arvis, people disapproving of the Emperor listening at shady people?)

The Ordelia experiments leads me to believe the plan to become "super strong with dual crests" was hatched and developed during the Ionius era, but again, the game is so crappy at lore building that we don't even know if Ionius had 10 (legitimate) sibs, or only 5, and what they are doing when Supreme Leader is running the show, or did when Ionius was defanged.

Granted, we don't know since when Agarthans are slithering in Adrestia - if we believe the "Willy's sekrit history" was tampered with and assume Supreme Leader was telling the truth, that it was passed down in generations, maybe Agarthans were slowly manipulating Adrestian Emperor to get their revenge on Nabateans (in Nopes, a book about the rebellion of the Southern Church mentions how the Emperor wanted to cut ties with the Central Church anyways since a long time, but doesn't explain why).

And so, maybe Agarthans devised several plans, that all failed, to make the Hresvelgs turn against the Church and be strong enough to be flattened in 5 seconds, and it only worked during Ionius' era ?

We will never know, but it's still fun to think and headcanon about!

To bounce back on the "Adrestia demands many heirs" thing, given how I am fond of a certain AU, what if

This came up as a reaction to the entire Lycaon debacle?

Wilhelm 1 picked a heir, his heir died "to a mysterious illness" and instead of assuming rulership or helping another heir to rule - like he did for Lycaon - Wilhelm bailed out of Adrestia.

It could be explained by Lycaon being the golden child and favourite kid of his dad, so if he's not the one ruling, Dad doesn't give a fuck anymore about his Empire... or -

What if Lycaon was Willy's only child, and the subsequent Hresvelgs are "cousins" or members of a branch family?

In that case, it wouldn't be Willy playing favourites, but bailing out because his own son "suddenly fell ill and died" and he wouldn't be as involved as he was in helping his own kid, if now we're talking about helping a great grand-nephew or someone else.

(Rhea would have had to give a transfusion to the subsequent Emperor - i name her by convenience Hildegarde bcs no imagination and it's faster to type than "the female emperor who succeeded Lycaon and dueled against Ferdie's ancestor who wanted the throne" - to make people believe there is a direct continuity between Wilhelm, Lycaon, Hildegarde and her future heirs).

In that "only kid" scenario, it would also justify why House Hresvelg became so obsessed with taking Consorts and having a lot of heirs - Adrestia was nearly left Emperor-less after Lycaon's death because they had no other heirs to pick a successor from...

[silviakundera]

Love's Rebellion ep 4 -8 watch comments (warning: these are my raw thoughts, so can be critical. don't read if that will upset you.)

I am enjoying the drama now less than in the first 3 episodes. I think it's that I have limited patience for nice characters pretending to be menacing. I'm ready for them actually to be communicating with each other and working off the same page.

I can see that he's becoming soft for her, since she's so obviously a nice person (and because of seal thingy we know he canonically has a pure heart). But I want more sexual and/or romantic tension than what they are giving so far. ML has made some effort but I'll be honest, I'm feeling nothing coming back from the FL actress. (i.e. nothing in her micro expressions & body language)

Gonna try to fast forward thru things.

Fox clan prince has been introduced. He doesn't like women; he only loves himself. So there is our first grey character.

Episode 5

It's so dumb that she believes in the fake death curse that I refuse to acknowledge this is happening

They are finally turning on some romance but guys, slow mo and mid music is not the answer. Just ask them to both ACT like they're falling in love.

The Great Sect dicks are being dicks, except 1 junior good boy

Young Dragon Lord is still a bro. Very appealing loser.

Episode 6-8

Continuing the situation where she's a nice person, but there's little in her individual performance that indicates she likes him that way. While it's clear that he has started falling for her.

Fox guy is just annoying. Sorry to all fox fans out there.

ah, memories of Super Sus Shifu. Why did ML of the canonically pure heart plead guilty? 🤔 The reason is gonna be some noble idiocy, I'm sure.

More contrived misunderstandings. The writing is forcing her to be annoyingly foolish. Why would she assume he is only after her pearl when he's never been the slightest bit interested in it?

This thing where they are always at odds for petty reasons, a fake-ass enemies to lovers, is wearing thin. Real enemies to lovers, I like. This stuff isn't to my taste. I am not a determined-to-dispute, bickering to lovers trope fan.

Now everyone's in mortal peril from boat lady, the demon elder of Evil Path sect. Sadly, she also bores me.

I like ML and FL ok (when they are getting along) and I do like Dragon bro. Add in fox and demon jiejie and 💤💤💤

Ugly cgi gremlin makes another appearance

ML shows up finally as backup. But will this just end up another annoying misunderstanding?

So after he rescues her and puts her necklace back on, they actually have a mutual romantic moment!

She's finally figured out he's a Canonically Pure Heart™ who is all bark, no bite

Now can you just get along for multiple episodes in a row???

There is absolutely no reason to forgive duplicitous fox boy and not wipe his memory and kick him the fuck out. 😑

On the plus side, we are finally getting some warm vibes back from her

oh how nice, poisioned hot pot. The fox betrayed them AGAIN. And once again he just says shit and FL lets it go. 😒

We actually get a moment of her appearing attracted to Shao Cang! 😯

I still attest that you don't need lense flares, slow mo, or tinted filters to communicate affection. Just acting. Someone ring Richard Li, he can show you how it's done.

I have enjoyed objectively worse & lower budget dramas, but somehow LR isn't clicking in with me. It somehow doesn't have that cdrama feel that compels me... Perhaps I'm not hooking into that emotional sincerity; so many things are constantly happening but they feel like noise and I don't have emotional resonance from the episodes. Characters are frequently picking at each other & prodding at each other, which fills up time on screen but that's what it all feels like... filler. Somehow the vibes remind me less of a cdrama and more about the fantasy adventure genre of tv series that were being aired on Sci-fi (Syfy) network and the BBC circa 2005 - 2015. And tbh I mostly watched those shows because of fandom participation and fan outputs, not for the media product on its own.

I've commented before that cdramas finally introduced me to "good guy" characters that I wholeheartedly love and see as badass. But these leads aren't that style of protagonist. This isn't Xie Lian, Shen Qiao, Tang Fan, et al. So I'm left wishing that FL and ML were more ruthless, calculating, and grey.

[cringefaecompilation]

I know it wasn't the focus of your misogyny post so if I'm overstepping please ignore me, but it also really makes me mad when people "conveniently forget" that Ashton is nonbinary, especially when it justifies their shitty opinions (ie he's One Of The Boys™ so he's always correct and can do no wrong thanks to his male-based intellect unlike the awful evil women or he's an Evil Manipulative Man™ who's going out of his way to use his male-ness to harm these poor innocent helpless women because he said/did anything negative towards them). Like please y'all, they're not a man PLEASE they said their pronouns IN THE FIRST EPISODE PLEASE. Feel free to like/dislike Ashton all you want cause that's perfectly fair, but for the love of god don't be transphobic (especially to be sexist) when you do it??? Is that too much to ask??? Idk if I'm making sense/getting upset at nothing because I've seen a lot of people dismiss this as being silly or getting mad at nothing, but idk as a masc enby a lot of discussions around Ashton feel so gross? Idk though, once again ignore if I'm overstepping or anything

you are not being silly and you are not getting mad at nothing or overstepping. it's a huge problem.

i've seen way more of the former where he is misgendered as a cis male as a positive trait, so i'll be talking more about that. will be reposting my tags about this trend in fandom because i've already said my piece on it.

ashton is "schrodinger's man" to these people when they're bored with ignoring/erasing orym's respect and care towards the women in his life. they're nonbinary and trans when they're being directly defended against fans who only like the women, and they're a cis male who is a victim of violent misandry when complaining about previous drama or shipping laudmo/ore (willing to give the benefit of the doubt that maybe some of that blending is them including cis male actor taliesin jaffe but then again). the idea that shardgate was Feminism Going Too Far is an actual statement that i've seen going around the fandom, and it's gotten worse now with swordgate.

didja know there are people insisting laudna should have been abandoned by the hells or fearne should have gotten "harsher punishment" when her dad nearly killed her because both women did something selfish/impulsive and ashton was yelled at and punished for doing something selfish/impulsive? the They Only Were Upset With Ashton Because He Is A Man argument is so fucking dumb. bro almost nuked himself without telling anybody else and was the only one not forcing the shard down fearne's throat, of course they'd come to blows. and you wanna know why they didn't scream at fearne or laudna? BECAUSE THEY LEARNED TO NOT DO THAT. THEY HAD A THERAPY SESSION SPECIFICALLY TO AVOID DOING THAT SHIT AGAIN

and it really does make it obnoxious because i like him and orym's dynamic but it's so fucking frustrating seeing people make them into bell's hells leaders and Voices Of Reason just so they can say "orym is always correct because dead husband and imogen is a salty selfish bitch" or "ashton is always correct because tough love & street smarts and imogen is just a salty selfish bitch" that it immediately sets off red flags for me if someone says those guys are their favorite bh characters. and it sucks because i love orym and ashton too!

obligatory "both sides though" mention: yes. there are im/odna shippers that fantasize about "punishing" or murdering ashton. they do that to dorian and orym too. i am aware of them and i have seen them. i have 90% of them blocked lmao

and i have also talked about this before but the amount of people i've seen insisting callowm/oore is a bad homophobic cishet ship that erases fearne's pansexuality is BIZARRE. this argument was used to prop up fearn/iture which makes no fucking sense to me since chetney is, as far as we know, cisgender. we might not know ashton's sexuality proper but it's safe to assume they aren't heterosexual as they've flirted with people of many genders. also there was this genuine debate if as/hrym was a homophobic ship because orym only dates men... and. well. i don't think it'd be the same as shipping keyleth with orym, let's put it that way lol

[topazadine]

Hair loss creates greater emotional distress and self-esteem issues in women than men, yet you'd never know it from looking at media.

We're constantly blasted with ads for Rogaine, Keeps, Hims, all these messages about how men don't need to lose their hair. Get hair plugs! Look at this former football player with a full head of hair now. It's for self-care!

Yet, there's also the same reassuring messages to men (and men only) that if they choose to go completely bald, that's okay! They'll still be manly and tough! We have so many cool guys who are bald!

And ... what about women? Yes, Rogaine and Keeps make products for women (which are the exact same formulation btw, just Pink), but when do you see advertisements for it? When do you hear people discussing female alopecia other than in a pitying "aww that's so sad" way without offering real advice?

Women's hair is more tightly regulated than men's. Healthy, thick hair is a point of pride; we're advertised all sorts of things to keep it that way, told all sorts of things about what it means to trim your hair by even an inch. Hair, whether on your head, face, or body, is a signal of how well you're performing feminity (or if you're refusing to play).

No one gives a shit if a man plucks his eyebrows; no one would even notice. If a woman plucks her eyebrows, it must mean something. No one cares if a man chooses to shave his leg hair or keeps a furry pelt; either choice is valid. Women have one choice and one only if they want to play the game.

Too much body hair? No man would want you.

No body hair? You're pandering to men.

Hair too short? No man would want you.

Hair too long? You must be high maintenance!

Hair brightly colored? Liberal snowflake freak!

Hair a natural color? Blondes are dumb sluts, everyone knows that.

Hair too thick? What are you, a cave woman?

Hair too thin? Eww, take care of yourself, what's wrong with you?

God forbid you shave it all off to help stimulate hair growth, or because you have no choice. You're either a cancer patient or crazy. The pitying "there-there" looks I've gotten since buzzing my hair are driving me to madness. No one would do that to a man.

Or it's assumed that this is some political statement, that I'm advertising an identity. No, I'm removing my damaged hair so I stop looking like a shedding animal.

It's so frustrating that women are left behind and ignored in every single way, for every single condition, whether benign or serious. Yes, hair loss isn't a huge deal in the grand scheme of things, but it's frustrating. It's depressing. It's embarrassing.

I don't want to wear a hat or a wig! I want my condition to be treated with the same respect and sympathy as it would be for men. I want the same support, the same options, the same discussions of how to live with thinning hair.

But of course that's too much to ask. I'm a silly little lady woman girl and maybe I'd feel better if I went back in the kitchen and made some sandwiches.