#and he hated that his body was percieved that way

[cosmics-beings]

Drift making stickers, banners, shirts, just to make sure EVERYONE knows he’s the one responsible for the bitlets growing inside Ratchet (and his conjunx also growing grumpiness).

Drift, wearing a shirt: I’ve sparked my conjunx

Rodimus, wearing a shirt: my amica sparked his conjunx

Ratchet, unwillingly wearing a shirt: my conjunx sparked me

I want (and still plan to) draw this and even write this so bad. i wanted to draw it this week but my job got in the way T-T but I'm also saving this so i can draw them because them all in their T-Shirts would be so funny.

I can just imagine drift and rodimus being so damn chummy and laughing, and then ratchet is moping on the side. not only because he was forced to wear a shirt that basically screamed he got fucked side-ways, on the counter, on the floor, on the wall, etc., my drift, but he is so grumpy too. he is so damn grumpy like he has an attitude, the sparklings are probably gonna come out with one.

Like they take a family picture, especially for the sparkling shower, and it's ridiculous. I mean, Rodimus and Drift have a good time. Ratchet is a mixture of tired and stressed because he has a million surgeries to conduct--tho Drift won't let him do that. He wants his conjunx to rest.

also trivia but my dratchet sparklings actually don't look like ratchet. none of them look like him, they all favor drift at different stages in his life. however, they do actually have healing abilities. like they are outliers and all their outlier ability is to heal, though one's is to take life away with her touch. she becomes a doctor however and is as good as ratchet. Also adkjfaj Ratchet is still a doctor at that time.

Drift and Ratchet in my aus never actually stop having children so i cannot cap it. Like yeah we know in LL Ratchet dies but I've explained how he's still alive in my aus even after that and guess what...they go right back to having children. Ratchet always carries because in my aus personally, Drift has trauma with carrying because of things that happened in his past. He actually got his forge tank/valve removed. Originally, Rathcet wouldn't have cared to sire or anything, like he expected that's how it would be with he and Drift but Drift is very serious about being a sire.

[wanderersbell]

wanderer x reader

summary: sometimes, when he thinks you aren’t looking, he makes his vision glow and dim softly in a steady rhythm. the illusion of a heartbeat.

genre: fluff

warnings: none

word count: 1,175

a/n: hellooo first time posting i am terrified of my writing being percieved but i’m full sending it and might never do this again so slay ig. scara is kinda ooc (he is not being a jerk lmao)

sometimes, when he thinks you aren’t looking, he makes his vision glow and dim softly in a steady rhythm. the illusion of a heartbeat. 

it’s one of the many things you’ve noticed he does in the time that’s passed since you met him. he’s complex, stubborn, hard to read, prone to outbursts, and yet it’s the small actions and glimpses of vulnerability that remind you how truly human he is. no matter his origins, what his body may be made out of, or how many lies have poisoned his consciousness, he feels everything the way a human does. 

you don’t get to see it often, whenever he knows you’re looking he makes a huge show of being a brat and flaunting an arrogance that seemingly never left him after his loss of divinity that he knows irks you to no end when you just want a solid answer out of him, but there are times he isn’t aware he’s being perceived. 

you have a tendency to become so absorbed in a task that you lose all situational awareness and he knows this well by now, choosing those moments to let his guard down while you don’t pay him any mind. he’s shown you a side of himself that’s remained previously undiscovered until he grew undeniably fond of you over time. he shows this in the way he bounces his leg when you’re hurt or not feeling well, the way he disappears off to sumeru city when you claim that nothing sounds good to eat only to return with the pita pockets he knows you’ll eat no matter what, in the way he lets you stroke and place featherlight kisses against his knuckles when he wakes up from a nightmare and looks down at his hands that have done so many cruel things and calls himself a monster. 

that last one has only happened twice thus far, and he always refuses to meet your eyes for a while the next morning, but his tolerance for your small shows of affection and comfort are welcome progress in comparison to the offense he used to take from it when he only saw it as pity. after all, he hates being looked down on. however, actions often speak better than words. 

you know he doesn’t understand why you seem to care for him, and you know that it’ll take time for him to fully open up, which is why you make sure to give him the moments you’re occupied with other things to unmask and decompress and never interrupt him when you accidentally tune back into reality, but it’s only a matter of time before you give yourself away. 

and now, while you watch him from where you sit at the bank untangling a fishing net, you think this might be the day you finally do. 

he’s standing a short distance away under the shade of a tree where he was initially scrutinizing your work and making snarky comments about it that fell on deaf ears as you paid him no mind, but had at some point fallen silent and let his tense shoulders drop as he watched the wildlife around him. 

the dappled sunlight through the leaves above him dance along the top of his hat with the movement of the wind and soft metal chimes can be heard as the ornaments on his hat sway with it, but it’s the soft sound of elemental energy that had taken your focus away from the net and when your attention fell on him, he was doing it again, making his vision beat lightly against his chest. the sight makes your heart clench and a lump form in your throat, watching him gaze so softly down at the item hanging down from his shoulder. he holds his right hand underneath it gently, almost as if even the slightest of touches would throw off the rhythm, and it’s in this moment that you release a sigh a bit too loud that has his eyes snapping to yours in an instant. 

for a moment he looks like a child that got caught stealing sweets, eyes wide and body frozen in place, before he eventually frowns and sends you a sharp glare while turning his body away from you and crossing his arms with a huff, pretending to go back to staring off into the distance. 

your feet start carrying you to him before your mind can even process the movement but he keeps himself faced away from you until you move in front of him. he looks unsure and hesitant, but there is an undeniable level of trust that had built up between you two that kept him from growing instinctively defensive. 

“what?” he demands, refusing to meet your eyes. 

“do it again.” 

when his gaze finally lands on you he looks almost taken aback. “why?”

you shake your head. “just do it, please.”

he looks like he wants to argue, but decides to keep his mouth shut and lets his arms fall back down to his sides in defeat when he realizes you’re dead serious. slowly, almost shyly, his vision starts glowing with anemo energy again, steady and strong. when you reach your hand up softly to touch it he tenses up and almost backs away, but after a reassuring glance from you holds himself in place and nervously waits to see what you’re trying to do. 

you lean closer as your fingertips make contact with the metal casing around it, feeling the rush of energy against your hand every time it brights and dims again. you might be imagining it, but the rhythm seems to pick up the closer you get. 

when your warm lips meet the cool glass against his chest, it reacts immediately; the elemental energy starts pulsating faster and faster inside of the vision while the wanderer stiffens before you, entirely frozen on the spot as his ‘heart’ beats wildly at your boldness. his expression remains almost entirely neutral, so much so that you probably wouldn’t have been able to tell he was even flustered had his vision not given it away, and the thought makes you smile softly knowing he can’t hide how these small shows of affection get to him now. the flush rising in his cheeks is proof of the fact that he’s more than aware of this, and he wastes no time shoving you away and yanking his hat down to cover his face while he turns away in embarrassment. 

instead of saying anything, you clasp your hands behind your back and return to the riverside where you left the tangled net, and you can literally feel the way his eyes are burning holes into the back of your head when you pick it up and start picking at the knots again. 

what you don’t see is the way he stares at you with pure wonder and adoration spilling over in his indigo irises, hand resting over the place your lips had just been as if he can hold the feeling there forever.

[niseag-arts]

You know what, Vanadium lore dump.

this man does not yet have proper art, nor is he a fully realised OC yet but

In short:

techmarine, iron hand, baby (still in training with the mechanicus), big softy (for an iron hands)

A note on looks:

Vanadium wears Red mechanicus robes overtop his armour, rather than the more standard red techmarine armour. He also Really dislikes taking his armour off and will keep it on almost permanently (yes he is very stinky when he's finally coaxed out of it to clean himself). This, combined with the robes, makes people suspect that Vana would prefer to see his armoured form as his body, rather than the fleshy marine inside the armour.

He's kinda envious of tech priests and their freedom to shape their bodies however they please.

History and things:

Vanadium was born to two tech priest on a yet undecided forgeworld, and had an upbringing befitting for that. That is to say: strictly scheduled and optimised for productivity, whatever that means for a literal baby. However, this did not last long. When Vana was roughly 6 terran standard years old, he was presented to the Iron Hands as a bargaining chip. His forgeworld would recieve a good stack of STCs the chapter had found in return for a good number of new recruits.

He has survived "induction" and training with the iron hands and with that mental mess fresh on his mind he was send to Mars, and honestly, he found great relief and comfort in falling back into the schematic and structured life of the mechanicus after the harsh treatment of his chapter, and he quickly became a well-liked student among the mechanicus for his natural understanding of their "culture". Though they accept no diversion from him, and will discipline vana if he is percieved to be out of line. Possibly because of this, he has mellowed out a little from the hatred and distrust that wrecks his brain ever since the geneseed implementation. Remember, he is young. which brings us to

Personality and stuff:

Vana struggles. a lot. to accept his situation. He is in constant battle with the effects of the Iron Hands' geneseed and a lot of the hatred he feels turns inward and turns into self-loathing quite quickly. Of course, to admit that would be weakness. he hates admitting it. But to admit such things amid the mechanicus is a lot safer than it would be to admit such things amid his brothers, which puts him in a weird dilemma of loyalties. He dreads the day he will be returned to his chapter, and wishes that there was a way for him to progress within the ranks of the mechanicus instead. Of course, this is impossible.

I feel like I forgot stuff about him...feel free to ask questions and things

[laugtherhyena]

Fuck you *categorizes your moonscorches*

Earlier today i was chatting with my friends and it made me think a lot about the moonscorched forms of the termina cast and what they represent, the conversation itself was about Daan and Elise's relationship and how i personally don't think we can use Stitches as an accurate way to read her character due to moonscorch.

Because the moonscorch forms are at their core a distorted version of someone, however the way in which they're distorted tends to vary a lot between characters to the point that in order to understand what way that is you need to know who they were as humans, which is something we can't do with Elise since she's a background character who we never interact or see when she was alive.

This made me want to look into and try to categories the termina participants moonscorch forms in the way i think the distortion potrays them as, which it's not accurate to them as people in most cases.

-Daan: "This isn't who i am"

There's nothing about Pocketcat that resembles Daan aside from his physical appearance and a couple odd lines (of which i feel like may happen because he is a fresh new body for Pocketcat? So he still has a few of Daan's memories and mannerisms but those will likely fade away the longer he stays in that body) because he's just a creature who took over his body, Pocketcat is not Daan and Daan is not Pocketcat. I personally don't even count this as a moonscorch form, but sources tend to group him with the others, so i might as well add him in this list.

-Abella and Marcoh: "This isn't who i am, but what the world percieves me as"

To look at the Chaugnar and conclude that Abella is a rude and violent person is just straight up wrong. Abella as a person is kind, sweet and caring, but not only is her profession something uncommon for women to have in that time period but she actively works for an organization that values her skills and not her as a person.

It's easy to percive her as something she isn't judging solely by appearance and/or an abridged description of her character. This is what the Chaugnar is, it's Abella being potrayed as the mindless brute she doesn't want to be seen as.

The same thing happens with Marcoh, his background, his connection to mobsters, his reputation as a street boxer, all of those things can paint the image of Marcoh as a dangerous and violent man when in reality he is genuinely a good person at heart.

-Levi, Marina and Olivia: "This isn't who i want to be"

These the most upsetting form of moonscorch in my opinion because the distress and agony the characters are going through it's incredibly apparent.

Levi despises wars, they took so much away from him and gave nothing but trauma and addiction in return. He hates being associate with them which is why Weeping scope cries as he relentlessly scratches the gun on his head, it's Levi desperately trying separate himself from wars and violence, unfortunately to no avail.

Following her father's footsteps is not something Marina wants nor does she feel like she has to, the idea that her life has been decided from the moment she was born by someone else is something she hates. Marina's moonscorch is her being forced into this role and being controled by another person, a parasite that has logged itself onto her body and now gives her orders on everything she has to do.

This last one may be a little more of a stretch, i don't know Olivia as well as i know the other two, but her moonscorch being a giant machine that continuously poisons you through the fight makes me think about how much Olivia hates feeling like she's a bother to others and that a group would do better without her to "slow them down". There's also the fact that she's a botanist and machines are pretty much the polar opposite of the nature she cares so much about.

-Tanaka and Henryk: "This is who i need to be"

Judgement is pretty much the embodiment of Tanaka's feelings about how as the head of his family and their main source of income he needs to keeping going regardless of his mental of physical state, it doesn't matter if he's hurt or exhausted he needs to continue working, he has to, the grind never stops! Because this is what he thinks will make him the perfect eldest son.

Now this other one is heavily tied with my personal interpretation of Henryk's character; which is a man who, coming from a career that's usually not seen as very "manly", wants to fit in and conform with society's expectations of how a man is supposed to be because he hates the feeling of rejection.

That's why the Gentleman is, well, a gentleman. It's the kind of person Henryk feels like he needs to be. He's big, strong and moreover he's a leader, the mayor or Prehevil, it makes me think a lot about how men are expected to grow into strong leading figures just for the sake of being a guy.

-Samarie and O'saa: "This is who i should be"

Truth be told O'saa is one of the characters in this game i know the least about, so i had to get some help from my friend Marco on this and at the end of the day we thought this category was the best to describe his moonscorch. O'saa doesn't live by anyone else's rules, be it the government, the gods, he doesn't even follow the rules of the yellow mages, the Mastermind may be a manifestation of his ego as in if he isn't following them then he surely must be above all of these forces? Hard to say.

Now Samarie is a weird one, i don't really know where to start? So i think I'll do it by the name lf her moonscorch form, Dysmorphia, which is when someone obsseses over one or more aspects of their body that they consider a flaw. From her lines i get the feeling that Samarie really doesn't like herself that much and reading her mind mostly shows her calling herself a fool or a fucking idiot, so it's plausible that this dislike towards herself also applies to physical appearance and not just her as a person.

My friend once pointed out that Dysmorphia looks like the opposite of Samarie and while he said it in a joke manner i do feel like there's some logic behind it; Samarie has long hair but Dysmorphia has none, Samarie is skinny and bony while Dysmorphia is big and round, Samarie is always with a tired and kinda sad expression while Dysmorphoria apears to be smiling. It could be that Samarie hates herself so much that she sees this monstrosity that's the opposite of her as "perfect form" of sorts? She does say that she's radiating as Dysmorphia, i guess it's food for thought.

Because really this entire section is mostly me theorizing/speculating because these two were the hardest characters for me to categorize on this.

-Karin and Caligura: "This is who i trully am"

This is one of the most interesting moonscorch categories because they're the only ones that accurately potray who these characters are despite being distortions of their human selves.

Karin is the Valkyrie, she genuinely believes she's doing a good thing with her work, that she's is imortalizing these fallen soldiers and giving them the recognition they deserve. At the same time she knows those who criticize her work have a point, she makes a living out talking about these tragedies like a vulture that feeds of a corpse on the side of the road, yet she sticks to her beliefs that what she does is good at the end of the day.

Meanwhile Caligura is undeniably a vile disgusting man, he is a monster inside and out. So seing him as a giant scrotum that stays submerged in gross sewer water does a good job at summarizing who he is as a person.

[quillkiller]

need some more lily headcanons from you bc u just get her so well!!!!!

mwah thank u this is so sweet.. <3 lets get into it…..

the worlds biggest imposter syndrom... my girl feels like a monster rather than a girl. hates herself for her monstrous deeply rooted carnal desires, her wants and needs. she feels vile, disgusting, neatly packaged into a an unsuspecting teenage girl. the inherent female experience of feeling monstrous and other simply for having a body…

she's a blank canvas that people project onto, and no one ever sees her or knows her. only turns her into the person they want or need her to be. she's the girl next door, she's the teachers favorite, a martyr, put on this pedestal- all of it against her will. she didn't ask for any of it, but it was assigned to her anyway. and she feels like a FRAUD !! but she so badly wants to be normal, so badly wants to feel like a girl instead of a monster in disguise. so badly wants to prove petunia wrong. petunia who calls her a freak, feeding into her imposter syndrom and she's convinced that petunia sees right through her. sees her twisted disgusting insides that she's trying so desperately to hide behind a girl next door-exterior. thinks petunia sees her nail-biting, the scratch marks, the cigarette burns. the hot and simmering Thing that wants to burst out of lily. the greediness, the selfishness, the short temper, the violent desire. but the thing is...... petunia is, at her core, the same as lily. she's trying to keep lily at an arms length, calling her a freak so that lily wont see her own twisted disgusting monstrous insides. she's calling her a freak out of envy and resentfulness. lilys strawberry hair, sun-kissed freckles, her welcoming and kind eyes, her magnetism. the things that lily hides behind. petunia is frail and angular, pale and blonde thin hair, harsh eyes. she has nothing to hide behind. lily is even MAGICAL !! proof to petunia that lily is special in ways she'll never be, proof to lily that she's the freak petunia makes her out to be

nobody speaks to her, no one knows her. james falls in love with her when they're 11 and just never lets her go. he doesn't even KNOW her, he just decided she's the love of his life. she's popular among boys, unpopular among girls. caught in the teenage girls hate each other type vibe. people roll their eyes at her when the teachers play favorite with her, thinking she's an an arrogant know it all. no one sees her, no one speaks to her. she could say something absolutely wild and genuinely vulnerablr like ’i want to kill myself’ and it would be dismissed immediately as a charming self deprecating joke. shes trapped and doomed

she hates herself for being so ungrateful for all her 'privileges', hates herself that she's never satisfied. hates the overwhelming boiling need threatening to break her open and tear through her ribcage. hates that she feels like a monster in disguise, trapped in this girl costume. she just wants to be normal, more than anything she wants to be normal. so she keeps repressing her emotions, keeps cutting off her rough and sharp edges to fit into the box of whoever people need her to be. it's not like she knows who she is outside of how other people percieve her, because she has never been seen. you are who you're percieved as, and her only other option is letting the monstrous thing living inside of her swallow her up (<- which would SAVE her, it’s NOT monstrous !!!! just REPRESSED !!!).

so she adapts….. makes herself small, easily digestible, the head-girl, the girl next door, james' girlfriend and then wife, top of the class, etc. she disguises herself as the picture perfect girl, desperately grasping for normal.. desperately trying to kill her monstrous need

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Now… we all know König is the epitome of a comphet man. Sadly, he has suppressed his homoerotic feelings (this guy has bathed in comics filled with half nude barbarian warriors, be they men or women, since he was a teenager) and will never address his bisexuality in any way because he's fixed on the ideal of some het idyll.

GODDD YOU WRITE!!! toxic kön so well it's actually unbelievable like it's so "traumatized person's idea of love that they based almost entirely on the dynamics of their family". like in that "im going to do it right and im gonna perform this role so well and ill be happy"

probably even better for him if his gf also comes from an awful family since she's willing to try and make the shoe fit all the time no matter if she fits that, if her own needs come out and she can admit them to herself because nothing can compare to the euphoria she (or könig) feels when he comes back home from deployment, meeting her in the kitchen where she's preparing food for him. and the house is clean and almost quiet and she has her hair and makeup done, she's so dressed up you'd think they're having guests over

probably bc the ghosts of their families (the arguments the physical abuse the fear and desperation and hopelessness and false promises of love and safety) are those omnipresent guests lmao. in their head there's a weird voyeuristic need to show off the perfect het relationship even when no one is watching

cw: im getting weird about gender in this next lart

but i bet könig and his gf in this case would also probably get scared shitless when put into a position that is the opposite of gender conformity.... (?)

his beloved would hate being compared to anything masculine, he hates being percieved as anything feminine. gender non conformity is something they feel is tied to being in a nonhet relationship so they will avoid it at all costs.

being in a het relationship, a traditional one especially, creates some kind of invisible boundary that they feel they can't cross 99% of the time, can't be forced into that other role of their "opposite" no matter what they do because the performance of masculinity and femininity is there in every other aspect of their lives and it makes them feel safe

he is the perfect man, the perfect husband and she is his perfect wife, a woman that only belongs to him and nothing can go wrong

"probably bc the ghosts of their families (the arguments the physical abuse the fear and desperation and hopelessness and false promises of love and safety) are those omnipresent guests lmao. in their head there's a weird voyeuristic need to show off the perfect het relationship even when no one is watching"

This is perfection, this whole message and esp. the paragraph above is art and you're so right!

And your analysis got me thinking...

What if they sometimes stray to the edges of conformity, for example Engel raises her voice and finally snaps at him? König gets to see something unusual: a woman being strong and putting up some boundaries and standing her ground... And he doesn’t get mad, he actually gets intrigued (even aroused??) So he continues to push those boundaries again and more often, tries to carve out that reaction so different from how his mother behaved when he was a child.

Or when Engel sometimes gets to be on top and ride him while having a wicked little twinkle in her eyes? König gets to witness the blunt force of her lust, sees a glimpse of this woman who is comfortable in her sexuality while he’s lying there under her, seemingly vulnerable, as she takes him, uses his body for a change? Fuuuuck

Or how Engel feels in those rare moments when König is seconds away from crying, he's sniffling in her tits because of this or that trauma response or trigger, when König, this big, broad, controlling and protective giant is the one who needs protection and support?

She feels so out of her element and at the same time feels such a relief when the eternal masculine monument of power finally crumbles, even if just a little, and she gets to caress his head and soothe König during his breakdown.

Then back to their “preferred” gender roles they go, König clears his throat and Engel cooks another dinner, giggles in his lap while he treats her like a fragile little princess…

Gahh I want Engel to try on his hood and like choke him a little in bed or something while König looks up at her with the tiniest tinge of submissive adoration. Also, why can’t these two just be normal and work their way out of their stupid problems in a healthy way lol… (I wouldn’t have anything but wholesome fluff to write then would I!)

[devilboydogman]

“What does it feel like, for you? As someone with a permanent body? The dysphoria, I mean.”

Reigen sighed, and looked down at his hands. “It’s like… Clothes that don’t fit quite right. You know? Not conspicuously, at least not from the outside. They look… Good enough, to most people. And usually I don’t even notice anything awkward, until, say, it restricts my movement, or someone else points it out. After that, it’s all I can THINK about. Maybe it’s a little tight in the hips, or long in the arms, or loose in the shoulders. But I can’t afford a new one, and besides that, I’m attached, you know?”

Dimple’s eyes narrowed with speculative scrutiny. “Sounds like you’re talking about the suit you wear every day. The one you’re still wearing right NOW.”

Reigen’s eyes grew wide with mania, and he rose to his knees on the bed and looked half ready to throttle Dimple’s spectral form as if we was capable of doing so. “Because that’s EXACTLY what it IS, Dimple!” He was getting loud, now, his voice taking on the giddy desperation of a man finally putting something into words that had needed to be said a long, long time ago. “This fucking SUIT. Would anyone know who I was if I wasn’t wearing it? It’s who I AM, or at least who I sometimes believe myself to be, who I am almost ALWAYS perCIEVED to be. I-I feel naked without it, unless I’m completely alone, o-or with someone who ACTUALLY knows me. I don’t FEEL dysphoric when I’m alone with my own body, even looking in the mirror, or in the shower. Because when it’s just me, my body is just my body, and no one is around to misperceive me as something I’m not, something I never HAVE been. I’m a man, and I feel like a man no matter what I look like, right up until someone ELSE says or implies otherwise. My self image is-is almost ENTIRELY created around others’ perception of me. Half the time I don’t know who I am,” he had to force himself to gasp for a deep inhale. Often when he got to talking, it was difficult to stop, even to breathe. “A-and I don’t even mind the suit, either. It feels like a part of me, even if it was created as a facade for rest of the world to see. That’s still me, I think. People tell me I sh-should get it hemmed, or refitted, or-or fucking REPLACE the damn thing, but— Dimple, this is ME. I hate it sometimes, but it’s MINE, and it’s ME. Not everyone notices, but my jacket and my body, we have matching scars. A carefully stitched seam in tandem with marred skin on my own back, identical in size and shape. It almost died with me. I can repair it, but I won’t make it change, and I can’t replace it. Call me a stingy bastard or whatever, but it’s— It’s really, really not about money, Dimple.” He settled back onto his haunches. Wrapped his arms around himself instead of gesculating. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter, more controlled. “That’s not even really a transgender specific thing, I don’t think. Like anyone else, we often don’t view our own bodies or selves as being WRONG until someone else contradicts what we already believe, or points something out in a negative way. No one is born hating themselves. The first lie I lived wasn’t even self created. That lie, the biggest one, I think, was forced onto me the moment I came into existence, and then it was written on my fucking birth certificate. Twitter.com can call me a liar all they want, but really, the lie they are perceiving is my actual truth. It’s just not what they want to hear.”

[shycoffeeland]

SIMON RILEY HEADCANON LIST

This includes: mentions and references to childhood abuse. soapghost mentioned once.

Chronically on edge around alcohol and drunk people.

To the extent he entirely shuts off and doesn't acknowledge anyone around him if they've been drinking. Off deployment and everyone's going for a pint? He'll leave after 5 minutes if he even shows up at all.

Grew up being left alone in pubs for hours and hours at a time and so unconsciously associates them with his dad.

Doesn't want to appear weak or childish around the subject of alcohol, so he's tried to force himself to have less of a reaction to it, to no avail.

Avoids drinking himself, but in the rare cases he does, he's an angry drunk.

Scarred down the left side of his face, the result of a beer bottle to the head as a teenager. It's healed significantly but is still very visible.

Trained himself to fall asleep in any conditions while on deployment, but when he gets home, his head is far too loud without the background fire to even begin to relax.

Prefers cats over dogs. They're quiet, keep to themselves, and more often than not, don't try to bite you.

Prefers tea, definitely, but still likes coffee.

The most scarred parts of his body are his face, hands and forearms.

The masks-

They serve a lot of purpose. If his identity was ever to be found out by those outside of the circle that already know, there would be several negative repercussions.

They also serve as a comfort for him. He suffers with dissociation to an extent that he has no idea what he actually looks like. If he can just see and percieve the skull face, its a lot easier.

For him to trust you with seeing his face, it takes a lot. It takes him seeing you as more than just a fellow soldier, someone he'd want to know on the other side.

Gets concussed so often on missions.

Incredibly accurate and very steady handed with a wide range of weapons.

Knows sign language, rarely uses it.

His phone is in one of those super heavy duty cases, and despite that is smashed in the top right corner.

Numb and disconnected from the world around him, and can't really identify his emotions.

It feels like there's a ten inch thick glass wall between him and the people around him, and he can't form real connections with others.

Takes his anger out on other people. He doesn't usually have massive outbursts but will have no problem yelling at you and pushing you away.

Flies off the handle with incredibly personal insults, then secludes himself for days at a time instead of genuinely resolving things.

Hates silence.

In no way stable enough or open for a relationship; if he let someone in that close, he couldn't be away from them for such long amounts of time, but at the same time, would never be able to be with another soldier; the fear of something happening to them would start to cloud his judgement. It doesn't stop what he feels when he hears Johnny's irritating laugh, however.

Permanently cold hands.

If he's at home or on base, he likes to watch the sunrise. It's quiet, and a moment where he can put everything behind him for a bit, and simply just exist.

[pb-dot]

hey this is chance and here’s week 4’s prompt. how do strangers within the world view your protagonists? how would they describe them? and how does this contrast against how the protagonist views themself?

Thank you for yet another fun prompt Chase. I haven't thought about this angle all that much, but it is an interesting one. As usual I'll be talking about the dual protagonists of The Clockwork Boy, Jake and 13.

Jake stands out to the average citizen of The City as a bit of a brute. He's both taller and wider than average by a good margin, and his tendency to ponder often leaves him with an expression that makes him seem either dull-witted or slightly aggressive. As a consequence, people tend to stay out of his way. Jake knows that he is a large man, but it doesn't register as important in the same way for him as he takes his imposing figure for granted, and seldom if ever contemplates his potential for violence. One might call him a gentle, ruminating giant in that regard.

13 on the other hand has put considerable amounts of work into not being percieved by the general public. He wears unassuming robes and a cowl or a hat if he can help it. Provided nobody gets a look at his metal parts though, 13 would probably be described as a "twitchy-looking kid that looks like he's still on wartime rations," on account of his delicate features looking somewhat gaunt in the wrong light. 13 doesn't think much about his organic human features at all if truth is to be told, but that is only because his clockwork body takes such a dominant space in his perceptions. To put it mildly, 13 has a complicated relationship to his clockwork body, in that he both hates what it has made him and the war it has thrust him into, and loves the freedom it could concievably give him and, perhaps more importantly, how it makes Jake look at him. Oh, if 13 only knew that Jake was spellbound long before he saw even as much as a gear.

tag list @ettawritesnstudies @mrbexwrites @teacupsandstarlight @anonymousfoz @wrenofthewords @sm-writes-chaos @dyrewrites

If you want to be put on the Tag List for this project, please interact with my Tag List Post

[a-menaceinpink]

Tales of the Jedi, Episode 3: Choices

Another Dooku-centric episode, taking place sometime after the TotJ Ep 2 but after Qui-Gon Jinn has been promoted to the rank of master. We get a Mace Windu appearance (king) and a deeper exploration into both Dooku and Windu’s personal politics. 

1.1k Words because I have many things to say, as always <3

Episode Summary: Jedi Master Katri is killed on Raxus, but the Senator she’s protecting escapes entirely unharmed. When Masters Dooku and Windu go to collect her body, Dooku takes the orders of the Council into his own hands to investigate the actual cause of her death, as he thinks the whole thing is suspicious. It turns out to be an ambush by the Senator’s guard who are looking to kill the Senator for embezzling funds from the planet and exploiting the planet’s resources at the expense of the people who live there while living on Coruscant and generally avoiding consequences. It’s a good background for the philosophical debate between Windu and Dooku, who have two very different ideologies regarding the law and protocol. 

Now let’s dig into those ideologies!!

So wrt Dooku, this episode only cements what was starting to show through the cracks in the last episode. From the way Windu reacts to Dooku wanting to disobey orders (or not disobey but. Go beyond what they were instructed, shall we say), it’s obvious that Dooku has a bit of a reputation for throwing the desires of his superiors to the wind in favor of following what he believes to be right. In this respect, he was strikingly similar to Anakin (Disaster Lineage strikes again <3). I also noted that he’s even more willing to start a fight than he was last episode. Dooku’s barely patient enough to get to the location of the supposed ambush before he’s drawing his lightsaber and threatening the Senator directly.

I’d also say that Dooku is even more unsteady in his faith in the Jedi Council than before or at least more aware of their failings, which in turn makes him wayyyyy more critical. He has no problem taking the side of the rebels (pre-Separatists?) against the Senate because, as established last episode, Dooku agrees that the Senate is corrupt and that the Jedi is at minimum percieved to follow the Senate’s beck and call. Basically, even before he’s showing signs of turning to the Dark Side of the Force, he would definitely be supportive of the Separatists cause as a group of planets seeking to free themselves from the largely exploitative Senate members.

I am left wondering how he turns to the Dark Side after this, since he seems to have such a righteous indignation at the way the Senate behaves, but more on that with episode four.

As we turn to Windu, almost the polar opposite ideology appears. Please note I do not mean that Windu wants to exploit people and supports a corrupt Senate. If you think that and/or hate Windu generally, we are not friends. Anyway. 

Windu has a much more strict adherence to the rules. Even though he is ultimately glad that they are able to catch the true killer of Katri, he’s uncomfortable/unhappy with the fact that they had to disobey the mandate of the Council and ended up with the death of a Senator on their hands as a result. 

But more than that, Windu doesn’t seem a stickler for the rules as much as he seems to have an unwavering faith in the leadership of the Council and the Jedi Code. He earnestly believes that the Council’s approach is one founded in discussion and decades, if not centuries, of experience and should therefore be respected. I don’t have much more to say on Windu, as he isn’t the focus of the episode, despite his ideology being the mirror in the political debate that the episode presents. That said, I think his behavior this episode is both in line with his behavior in later entries in the Star Wars saga (TCW, Prequels) and it’s a bit more depth than he’s given almost anywhere else, which I really appreciated.

Moving away from characterization and character motives, the political debate presented in this episode is one that has been argued to hell and back in basically every piece of media set in the Prequel / Pre-OG Trilogy era: Laws vs. Doing what you think is right.

Now obviously that’s an insane oversimplification but fear not. I’ll go on.

A central problem that’s presented in this episode is that the Senate is fundamentally corrupt. The question is whether the Jedi are complicit in this corruption. Obviously, as Windu states, they are keepers of the peace and thus should be (by their own code) standing by the citizens of these exploited planets and helping them find justice. Unfortunately, the Jedi do tend to follow the orders/requests of the Senate, which gives them the reputation galaxy-wide as basically space cops. 

Over and over again, the question asks you through Dooku whether the Council can truly be following the right path is they’re defending those (the Senate) who are explicitly harming those who the Jedi are mandated by the Code to protect (literally everybody else). I don’t think they’re ever going to a come to an answer when it comes to this, although the episode does certainly paint Dooku in a sympathetic light in the same way Anakin is meant to be painted in a sympathetic light when they’re both denied membership on the council status and master status, respectively. You can make an argument for both sides wrt to whether they deserve that sympathy, but frankly I don’t care to argue that point. What’s interesting to the story is how this affects both of them.

I also do think their final exchange on Raxus is super telling for the overall state of affairs in the Jedi Temple: Dooku thinks that the Council is allowing themselves to be misled and thus that each should use their own knowledge (forgetting to slow down, have patience/compassion, or heed the advice of others) while Windu believes that the Council deserves their trust precisely because of it’s apolitical status, disinterest in ego, and adherence to the Jedi Code (forgetting that the Jedi Council can and has been affected by all of those things)

On an IRL politics note, the episode is super anti-industrialization (hello Tolkein my old friend) and asks the fundamental question of whether the rules/the law is worth abiding by if it means that innocent people will get hurt. Despite the short nature of these episodes, they pack a LOT of political philosophy in there.

[crosswordgf]

here are my fast & furious 6 thoughts, except im tired so this is only about the different actors physiques and physical appearances.

vin diesel has an outie belly button (googled shirtless vin diesel to confirm)! is he the only movie star who has this? could be! either way huge for the outie belly button community

maybe im just too far removed from middle aged straight women but the rock holds such an interesting position in that i think he’s so clearly never portrayed or percieved as like a sexual figure but he is i guess attractive and his body is always a selling point for his movie stardom but he’s always portrayed more like a sexless action figure than anything else. straight men think he’s cool what with the big arms but i dont think gay men are that into him. he’s literally never done sexy in a movie. it’s fascinating! unrelated is the rock a republican? there’s a vibe

roman calls brian the prettiest blonde around but he doesn’t even bleach his hair anymore. i hate this world. in general these are very hairless movies after like 1 and 2. im glad han still has hair at least.

michelle rodriguez (who is the bucky barnes of this movie) has those lovely strong arms but shes covered up with a jacket in all the action sequences which makes me feel sad. similarly i dont like that dom isn’t wearing shirts with the arms cut off anymore it was really charming and flattering for him.

[sodorz]

some more various facts and tidbits about jeb:

- he moved to sodor from america, the south specifically. he was born and raised in georgia

- hes the poster child of southern hospitality and friendliness. always kind, says hi to everyone, is willing to help others whenever needed

- hes in his mid forties, around 44-46

- calls everyone 'baby' 'darling' or 'sweetheart'

- has a thing going on with his fireman, not at all healthy but very consensual and loving :] theyre just both a little fucked up!

- leads a small cult whose goal is to make jeb a god, basically. hes insanely power hungry and craves nothing more than godlike power and control(his fireman is his number one cheerleader in this endeavor)

- sacrifices people on occasion, and dumps their bodies into his engine's firebox to remove evidence :)

- gets along well with his coworkers, even if some find him a bit off-putting due to cultural differences. edward however flat-out doesnt trust him

- no mental illness here, jeb is just a horrible person. thats just how he is

- hates anything he percieves as weakness, and will target people he views as such to sacrifice

- when hes mad at you, its in that way where he still acts friendsly, but theres an air of hatred and malice.

- very protective of his hair. touch it and he will strangle you

[mimikusu]

5 and 9 for Simon and Niko? Also 16, please!

Thank you so much for asking!! I answered all of these already, but I'll take the chance to add a few things, because I love to ramble.

5 I answered here.

And 9 I actually answered in the comments after @onetrickponi asked me. I shall paste my answer here:

'With Simon's inability to let go of things he can not control, he's always trying to avoid sneezing in public if possible. He doesn't even like doing it when he's at home alone. He's always feeling very much betrayed by his own body. And I'm gladly taking the chance to indulge into my humiliation kink, thinking about how much he hates it. To a degree where it's almost painfull to admit, that he's feeling almost ashamed for being ashamed. And it's the image of perfection he's so desperately trying to hold up. There's so much that's wrong about it. First, it might startle people. It would most certainly make them react to it and force him into unwanted interaction. When he's sick, it might draw attention to it. Not even mentioning the fact that he's very aware not to spread his germs if possible. However, he's exceptionally bad at holding them back when sick, which adds to his misery.

And for Niko it's almost never a big deal. He couldn't care any less. Everyone does it, so why shouldn't he?' Especially since there's nothing wrong with it. He rather likes the feeling of relieve, especially when he's got a cold. The fact that he's prone to endless buildups and stuck sneezes somewhat ironic given how Simon does not want to sneeze but can not help it and Niko would very much like to, but can not get them out. He's trying to be more considerate, given how badly Simon reacts to sneezing himself, but he's not very good at it. He simply does not care enough and he's very much unwilling to pressure himself about such a trivial thing like sneezing.

16 I already answered here. Although I got to say, that I'm happy to be asked twice. Simply because I really like that question and I've been a bit afraid to add it to the list, because I thought it might be too personal. I think (maybe I'm weird) that most of my OCs are somewhat personalities of myself in one way or the other. And I tend to think that I lack imagination to write/draw or think about something that I don't know anything about, which is why I relate to all of them. And I like to make them do things and act in a way I might not dare irl, because I'm either too scared or simply unable. And maybe it's me being autistic, but the fact that I am in full control of how they respond to one another is very satisfying. I don't have to think about how their actions might be percieved and if the respons to them is way off the grid, because it's up to me to force the other one to respond in a way, I can choose to my liking.

Seems like tumblr is cutting my answers short! Very sorry for that! Maybe it's just a mobile-problem?

Thank you!!!

[unicreamuwu]

Not really a request but more an headcanon on the vinsmoke brothers.

Ichiji, Niji and Yonji in reality can feel emotions but they are twisted so they percieve thing differently from any normal human and, when they do feel things like any one else, they just fake it by being extremely mean and shows zero emotions because of their father that considers them failures.

This being said, i picture them being extremely mean with their crush / s/o mostly because they don't know how to show proper emotions and also, they can be quite dangerous for this since they can feel emotion and being jealous is a pretty strong one.

This is a really good one. Sorry if this didn't turn out how you liked it to be. Congratulations on being the first person to request the yandere Vinsmoke.

~~~~~

Ichiji Vinsmoke

Judge made you be the young maid for his first son, Ichiji.

So, when Ichiji was young, he threw a lot of insults at you.

He didn't hit or injured in any way, he just threw insults at you.

He said stuff like "Your outfit looks ugly, you should change it." or "You know, you should change your body. Oh wait, you can't cause you already ruined it yourself."

He knows that you get hurt by this, and he likes it.

Then one day, you've been ignoring and avoiding him.

This happened for the past couple of years.

Never taken one order from him, or do anything for him.

He hates it when you hang out with other people, especially Sanji.

He went to his mother, Sora, to tell her about this.

She tells him to apologize to you and he did.

But, you saw that as a joke and completely ignored it.

When he was finally an adult, Judge said something that'll shock everyone, including you.

"Ichiji, my son. I've noticed how you look at Y/N a lot, so I've decided that you should marry her."

And so, it happened.

You were married to him. Under his mercy.

You hated this and he knew.

But he loves it.

He finally got you to notice him.

Niji Vinsmoke

Being a young maid for the second Vinsmoke son is similar to hell, but much worse.

Unlike Ichiji, not only does he throw insults at you, but he also beat you up.

He would trip you while going down the stairs, hit you "on purpose", and throw his plate of food at you.

One day, you had enough and said something.

"You know what, if you don't treat me with respect, then I won't serve you anymore!"

He was silent, then laughed thinking it was just a joke.

But, turns out he was wrong.

You actually stopped serving him.

He started to get annoyed by this, but started to is develop some strange feelings.

He was pissed off when he saw you hanging out with Sanji in his cell.

This went on after Sanji ran off after years.

When he finally became a germa, he went to his father.

"Father, may I ask you something?"

His father looked up at him.

"Can I have your permission to marry Y/N?"

Judge looked at him for a moment before nodding.

"Well, I suppose so. You will make children with her."

And it was settled.

You were under his mercy.

There will be no ignoring or avoiding.

Unless you want a punishment from him.

Yonji Vinsmoke

Yonji didn't want a young maid at first, but when he saw you.

He knew he was going to have a lot of fun.

Like a lot.

He's better than Niji but worse than Ichiji.

He would throw insults at you, but he doesn't do anything harmful.

Other than tripping you over.

After months of being stuck next to him, you had enough.

You told him to stop multiple times, but he saw that as a joke.

It was until you started to ignore him.

He tried everything to get your attention, but it was like dust blowing away from the wind.

Yonji barks at people when they just spoke one word to you.

Even his brothers.

He doesn't know what this is, but he kinda liked it.

He asked his mother about it, and she told him that it was some twisted way of love.

And oh boy, he loved it.

Finally, after years, he started to get more possessive each time.

Until one day, he pinned your arms against a wall nearby.

He watched as you struggle to get out of his grasp until you stopped after hearing his line.

"You'll get married to me in a couple of weeks. You better not think about escaping this kingdom."

His voice sounded threatening and you were scared.

And you shakily nodded your head.

After the agreement, you were glued to the man you never had affection for.

[riorinn]

i dont hate belphie.

i love belphie.

chapter 16 spoilers

In my opinion, his actions were understandable, yes killing is obviously bad but I think demons think and percieve death differently?

No I'm not saying that you aren't allowed to hate Belphie, you do whatever you want. Just dont spread the negativity around

Belphie killed the species that was the cause of his sisters death, the brothers fall, the whole trauma of them. If idk, a bear killed a family member and did something that is equal to the fall, I would hate bears yk

He didn't know how to express the trauma and took it out on us, the same species that was the cause of their downfall

And the whole exchange student stuff was also technically the reason why he was locked up in the attic

Also didn't we just technically experience the death in third person? like we saw the dead body, we aren't the dead body. Idk if we gained the memories or not but,, even if we did we still experienced it in third person

And how would the brothers even punish him like- string him up? bro he took a life i dont think its gonna do much, and he was like sorry? about it? idk how to explain it but yea

also for the people who says "i wish they talked about it" no bc what are they gonna talk about 😭

"oh yk how belphie killed you-" LIKE 💀

id really rather them not talk about my death-

anyways, thank you for listening to my rant :)

also just saying that i understand if you dont like belphie, no one has to like every character. Just dont hate on others for liking him, thats absolute bs.

I will respect everyones way of thinking of what happened (unless its literal crap that didnt happen yk)

[cornfarm]

waves against the rocks

saiki kusuo x reader

word count: 2.0k

synopsis: you show saiki your powers. he’s unbearibly jealous, yet for the first time, he feels seen and understood by another person.

cws: mention of the reader having a bad family

genre: melancholic fluff

reader is gender neutral!

===================================================

notes:

greetings... i promise i’m working on cease and desist part 2 but i keep starting one shots;; I ALSO DECIDED TO CHANGE MY TEXT FORMAT... i yoinked all the capital letters away... it feels a bit more liberating

whenever i make my crazy op self insert oc, i always think about how i can make them a foil/double to the characters i like. for example my gintama s/i is also a traumatized war veteran. i thought like... wouldn’t it be fun to write the reader character as a direct foil AND double to saiki? they have everything he doesn’t, but he has a lot that they dont and it’s like,., mutual jealousy.

i also wanted to write saiki properly empathizing with someone. aiura and toritsuka are so fun because they both have different moral compasses with their powers and how they’d like to use them. however despite the fact theyre all psychics, saiki can’t really empathize with either of them.

i wanted to have saiki be excited about something, and feel truly seen. empathy is a very powerful thing.

i hope the “ability” i chose isn’t too cringe;;;

i can’t help but feel like i write saiki ooc so feedback would be super appreciated!

===================================================

perception. the way people are seen by others, the mental images and sour thoughts rooted in nothing but misconception. the falsafied persona of greatness, beauty, and kindness. perception.

you kept saiki afterschool. tugging at his sleeve, you quietly asked “i need to show you something, stay here for a few extra minutes?”. he refused you at first, but you stayed firm, “i need you to stay.” fierce. he decided to stay.

but you stood before saiki, right? were you there? he suddenly felt a bit weary, head pounding at the thought of you. your name, voice, scent, failing to find matches in his library of records. when he thought of you, his brain flickered through the faces and names of everyone else he knew.

you were a gap, a void, a sudden unconjurable memory. it was horrifying. but he quickly accepted it. the body circling behind of him was none of his concern, because there was nobody there. he supposes he should go home now. why was he standing alone in the classroom anyways?

firm hands land on his shoulders, warm, present. he remembers why he’s here.

“it’s not that i’m invisible, it’s just that your brain can’t recognize me, and refuses to acknolwedge me as a thing that exists.”

like a wave crashing against a rocky shore, the void is filled. your voice, your scent, your name, all slotted back into place in his mental library. he recognizes the hands on your shoulders as yours. 

a hand snakes around and pushes up his glasses, covering his eyes.

“it’s not about visibility, it’s perception. you are unable to percieve me as a living thing, or of anything of importance. that’s why you can’t read my thoughts, and that’s why you’re so quick to give up trying to recall me.”

he’s practically trembling- you have one power. it was simple, but it managed to find a loophole around practically all of his.

“that’s terrifying.”

“right?”

you take your hands away and step in front of him. he adjusts his glasses properly.

“were you born with it?”

you nod, “it caused me trouble when i was a kid. i almost got left at an airport,” you chuckle.

“does anyone else know?”

“i’ve tried to tell my parents but they don’t believe me. they called me a liar and delusional, so i decided to stop trying with them. nobody else knows, i’ve never told any of my past friends either. when i found out about your powers, i thought maybe someone would finally understand. that’s the only reason i wanted to tell you.”

your lip quivers, “you believe me, right?”

truth be told, saiki’s stunned. he wasn’t expecting someone like you to have such an abrasive ability. despite how reclusive and fittingly unnoticeable it is, it was certainly powerful.

he’s jealous. you were able to freely aquire something he wanted- privacy, but he does believe you, afterall he just watched you waltz around him, outside of his keen field of view. 

“yeah, i do.”

you smile, bright and wide- you’re nearly trembling. was being believed that big of a deal to you?

you take a step forward and embrace him, wrapping your arms around his torso as your head presses against his chest. he goes a bit stiff, and glances at the door. “hey, someone might walk in-”

“it’s fine.” you look up at him, meeting his eyes, and oh. your eyes are glimmering, shining greater than he’s ever seen them, “they won’t.”

burying your face back into him, he tenataively wraps his arms around your back. you continue, voice muffled, “’m sorry, you’re the first person who’s accepted me. i’m happy.”

the emotional explanation for your actions ease him a bit, “it’s fine.” he states back.

you finally pull away, and for a brief moment as you lose connection, you flicker out of his view, but you come back in again, placing your hand on his.

“actually, i can touch you while using my power without you being affected by them, but i’m manually using it on you right now.”

“if you touch someone while making sure they still can’t see you, what does that make them experience?” his voice is clear, a bit fierce in tone. you always had trouble reading saiki, but you could tell that this was interest. perhaps he was threatened, but he was certainly intrigued.

“they might whirl around and look who’s touching them and account it to a person around them, but if not, they might think they’re having sensory hallucinations. i can also talk to people, but because my voice doesn’t have any weight to it, it’s almost like a hypnotic suggestion.”

“so you can brainwash people?”

“not necessarily,” you let go of his hand, you must have released your power, your eyes are dark, “if i suggest something to someone and it’s something mild, they’re more likely to do it because it already falls into their line of thinking. if i suggest something bold, they might do it thinking it’s an impulsive thought.”

“most people won’t do extreme things, they’ll read those as intrusive thoughts. but sometimes people think my voice is the voice of god, or a passed on relative, and will do intense things regardless of their judgement. others have poor impulse control, and some are just batshit crazy.”

you sheepishly scratch your head, “but i don’t really like having that much control over people. i don’t want to use my powers to hurt anyone.”

“do you want to use them to help people?”

you pause. it seems you’ve thought about this quite a bit.

“well my powers can’t help people. they give me the ability to help people, but they can’t help people directly. i think it’s a matter of it i’m strong enough to help people.”

“are you?”

“would you hate me if i said no? of course i lend a hand to my friends when they need it, but i don’t think i’m strong enough to really make a difference. i want to live peacefully.”

you look down at your hands, “i wish i wasn’t born with it.”

saiki felt unnervingly softhearted. he struggled empathizing with his peers, but his heart pounded in solemn familiarity. “i don’t hate you for that, i’m the same. having the powers i do means i have the responsibility of keeping the world in peace. people would be jealous of me for the self-fulfilling purposes i could use my powers for, but i don’t want to use my powers to hurt people. i don’t want to help anyone either. i just want to be left alone.”

guilt. guilt was a disease, just like jealousy is. it eats at you from the inside, and creeps up at times least expected. it left both of you hollow and empty.

“i wish i didn’t have powers,” he continues, “i don’t think i’ve ever properly experienced life in the way i’m supposed to, like everyone else has. i’m envious of you, you’ve had a bit more normalcy than me.”

“i suppose we’re equally unhappy, then,” you smile at him. he had been staring out the window, but he turns to looks at you. you’re leaning on the door of the classroom, tilting your head, you ask him a silent “walk home with me?”. 

“i mean,” you begin, “i’ve missed out on a lot. i’ve always had trouble making friends- my powers made it difficult for people to remain interested in me. i’ve gotten pretty good at controlling them, pk academy has been really good to me, but it doesn’t heal the damage it’s caused me.”

your teeth gnaw at your lower lip, “your family is so supportive of you, they love you so much, it makes me angry. i wish i could say the same about mine.”

it wasn’t too empty in the school, but your footsteps were loud and clear, both you and saiki walking in sync. saiki didn’t really know what to say, so he stayed silent. 

sighing, you continue, “i don’t want to be alone, but it’s too easy to be reclusive when that’s where you’ve always been. if you live a life of isolation, making friends is scary and draining,” a grim smile forms on your face, as if you’re trying to comfort yourself.

but saiki does have to admit that the two of you have much more in common than he initially thought. he quietly thinks to himself, perhaps he could use your abilities.

“y/n,” he begins, eyes meeting yours, “will you do me a favor?”

“yeah, what is it?”

he doesn’t like being indebted to people, but he wants to test your limits. you don’t give him the chance to ask, “you want me to use my powers while we walk out together, don’t you.”

his mouth falls a bit open, lips parting, “how did you know?”.

you laugh, “you’re not the only one who can read minds,” and reach out to wrap a hand around his forearm. he raises a brow at you, seemingly amused by your comment. he expected you to take his hand again, but your firm grip on his arm was admitedly unexpected.

he felt his heart skip a beat.

“well? are you doing it?”

“yup, you won’t feel any different though.”

walking down the steps together, people passed the two of you, strangers, familiar faces, teachers. nobody noticed.

the two of you passed toritsuka at the steps, but he paid no mind. “you know,” saiki started, “when i use my invisibility power, that guy can still see me.” 

“can he?” you murmur, your voice a bit low. 

“if it’s easier, you can just think what you’d like to say to me, we can talk that way.”

you squint your eyes in concentration, “like this?” you think to yourself. 

“yeah.”

you smile. you continue to hold onto his arm as he changes his shoes. 

“that must be frustrating, that he can still see you.”

he nods. he supposes if toritsuka can’t see you, then aiura probably can’t track you- and him, down either. 

“hold onto my arm while i change mine.”

without breaking contact, he gently wraps his fingers around your wrist. you hastily change your shoes, and slide your hand a bit up, taking his in yours.

“is it neccesary to hold hands?” he asks. his expression was nearly deadpanned, but the slight crease in his brows communicated just enough. he felt sheepish, a bit lost.

“no, but it’s nice.” 

teruhashi stands idly at the exit, waiting, doing her best to gently shake off the boys that surrounded her.

“she’s looking for me.”

“is she? do you want to talk to her?”

“no.”

you pause. 

“is she the reason you asked me to do this for you?”

he nods.

you turn and head towards the gate, but not before waving a hand in front of her face. you take a deep breath, before exclaiming a loud “teruhashi!”. she whirls around, trying to find the source of the voice, looking rather bewildered.

letting out a hearty laugh, you grin up at him. a slight huff of air escapes his upturned lips.

the two of you slip past the front gate.

“but you owe me something in return, i don’t give out my labor for free!”

he sighs, “what would you like?”

“wait, really? i was joking, you don’t have to do anything for me!” you double down on your demands.

“you say that, but i know you’re secretly hoping i’ll treat you.”

“shit, i forgot you can read my mind. that’s so invasive.” you pout, “not fair!”

“it’s fine, i don’t like being indebted to people, and you did do me a favor like i asked, so i’ll take you somewhere.”

you look a bit nervous, “really? you’re sure?”

“just accept the offer before i revoke it.”

you twirl in a circle, letting go of his hand and hopping a few steps ahead of him. “you’re buying me a nice coffee then!” 

he lunges out to take it again.

“sure.”

and once more in sync, both of your hearts skip a beat.