#and he starts studying to get a better grasp of the language so that some of the knowledge truly is his

[roughentumble]

also i think it'd be fun if some of the nogitsune rubbed off on stiles. not in a "he's dark and evil now" way but in a "an incomprehensible old spirit beamed its thoughts directly into his head" way, like maybe now he has a latent understanding of japanese, because that's what the nogitsune thought in. and he wasnt privy to its thoughts most of the time, and Understanding what was said was kind of just, forced into his brain, but the latent comprehension is still there. the nogitsune never told him the rules of go, but he still plays like a champ when the pieces dont make him break out into a cold sweat, because he simply Understood the rules. something about its presence forced the knowledge into the subconcious of his brain

he cant write or read japanese, and he's semi-crap at speaking it, but rough comprehension comes innately.

he should have knowledge with no source, further proof that for a while he was not himself and he was not in control

[forever-rogue]

okay i got one for you 👀 joel and reader dancing in their kitchen to old records and ellie seeing them and teasing them then they all dance together and spend the night in

AN | How about a little found family fluff?Enjoy ❤️

Pairing | Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings | Language

Word Count | 2.4k

Masterlist | Joel, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It wasn't often that you got some time alone with Joel. Sometimes it felt more you were passing ships in the night…or always surrounded by someone. 

But this afternoon it happened to be just the two of you, not a single other person. It was almost too quiet. Which you’d complain about, if it hadn’t been for Joel’s soft snores sounding throughout the space. He was exhausted and you couldn’t blame him for taking advantage of a mid-afternoon nap on the rare occasion that it presented itself.

You were half tempted to join him in bed, but thought better of it, knowing that absolutely nothing would get down if both of you were napping. And there was always something to do. 

You peeked in on him, smiling when you noticed how he starfished all over the bed…he always was a bed hog, even if he denied it. His hair was a mess, mouth open slightly but for once he looked relaxed and comfortable. It was a rare sight to see, but you loved it so much. Popping into the room, you brushed a few rogue locks of hair out of his face before pressing a kiss to his cheek. He made a small sound, but didn’t stir further.

You changed into some comfier clothes, sliding on a pair of shorts and an old shirt of Joel’s before padding into the kitchen to clean everything up. It wasn’t your favorite thing in the world, but you like the bit of normalcy it brought to life. Although you supposed that this, the current messy statement of the world, was normal now. It had been over twenty years and you’d stopped holding your breath for things to return to how they were. All you could do was make the best of it…Joel and Ellie helped a lot with that. You had no clue where you’d be without them.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A few hours had passed and you’d gotten the space all neat and clean and were rummaging through the fridge for what to make for dinner. 

That was until you felt a strong, familiar pair of arms wrap around your waist. You yelped softly  as he pulled you against his warm body and laughed, causing the sound to reverberate through his chest. 

“Joel!” you tried to make it sound like you were reprimanding him, but it felt flat and made him laugh even harder, “you’re a jerk! You could have given me a heart attack.”

“Relax,” he whispered in your ear, voice low and husky, causing a shiver to shoot down your spine. You made a small sound as you became more pliable in his grasp, feeling like putty as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder, “maybe you should be more careful - listen better. Never know what or who could sneak up on you.”

“There’s no one or anything I’m typically on the lookout for,” you turned around so you were facing him, a pout on your lips. Joel was tempted to kiss it away, “you don’t let me go outside very often.”

“That is for your-”

“Safety,” you mocked, but there was nothing but reverent fondness lacing your tone, “I know, you worrywart.”

His expression was hard as he studied in silence for a few moments and you wondered if you’d done something wrong. But before you could ask, his face softened and he leaned in to pepper kisses across your face, which only caused you to giggle, the feeling of his beard tickling your skin. You felt his hand brush against yours, and took his hand, threading your fingers through his, “Joel.”

“C’mon,” he tugged on your hand gently, and started to back up towards the bedroom. You didn’t move for a moment and instead shook your head, both of you knowing that it wouldn’t take much for you to comply with him, “baby. You’re killing me here.”

“Dramatic much?” you snorted in amusement but gave in, letting him tug you along, “what would you ever do without me, Joel Miller?”

“Suffer,” he sounded so sure that you shook your head in amusement, “you don’t want me to suffer, right?”

“I dunno…”

“Alright, alright,” he huffed, gently nudging you onto the bed, “that’s enough out of you.”

You made yourself comfortable on the soft sheets that still smelled like him, that were still warm from him. You sighed softly as you looked at him, squealing as he perched himself over you, caging you in between his arms as he dipped his head down to kiss you. Okay, this wasn’t too bad at all. 

Joel kissed you until you were both soft smiled and wild eyed. You put your hand on his face, brushing your thumb over his cheek as you looked at him sweetly. It was almost too much for him to bear; to feel so safe and loved. 

“What are you thinking?” he closed his eyes as he leaned into your touch, turning his face so he could press a kiss to your palm. 

“Thinking about you should stay in bed with me-”

“What about - “

“It can wait,” he insisted quietly as you beamed at him. Honestly? You would never say no to him, “stay with me. Just for a little while…who knows when we’ll get the chance again?”

“Okay,” you pulled him back to your lips, “you’ve convinced me.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It was dusk by the time you’d stirred from slumber, still tangled up with Joel. You were curled into his body, his arm lazily draped over your waist and legs tangled together. A contented sigh escaped your lips as you stared outside the window at the pretty pinks and lavenders on the horizon. You cherished moments like these; the quiet, still ones that didn’t involve anything other than just being. It was a rarity these days.

“What are you thinking about?” he whispered, dragging his lips along your shoulder. You hadn’t even realized he was awake. You were about saying something deep and sweet but then your stomach rumbled loudly throughout the otherwise quiet room.

“Thinking about how hungry I am and how it’s time to make dinner,” you laughed, the sound going straight to his heart as you pulled out of his grip. You grabbed your (his) shirt off the floor and slipped it back on as he lightly groaned, frowning at you, “calm down - it’s not like you’ll never see me shirtless again!”

“But I’d enjoy it now…”

“The sooner you help me make dinner, the sooner we can get back to bed-”

He was at your side before you could even finish what you were saying, which just caused you to laugh. His hands found purchase on your hips as he steered you towards the small kitchen. But before you could get to cooking anything he stopped you for a moment, “I have something for you.”

“What?” you asked in surprise and he nodded eagerly, “Joel, you didn’t have to get me anything.”

“I know,” he trapezed towards the closet, digging through it for a few minutes before pulling something out and holding it up to you triumphantly, “ta da.”

You looked between him and the object he was holding for a few moments, heart constricted with affection. You felt the familiar sting of tears at the back of your eyes as you looked at the man you loved. Joel’s expression wavered for a moment, unsure of how to handle your reaction. 

“Joel,” his name caught in your throat as you took a few steps closer, “a record player?”

“Yeah,” he nodded, his cheeks warming up at the tender look of affection on your face, “you mentioned that you’d always wanted one…”

“I mentioned that like once,” you exhaled softly as he set the player down on the table. You brushed your fingers along the top, admiring it with soft eyes, “a long time ago. You remembered.”

“I remember a lot,” he shrugged it off like it was no big deal, “and I like you a lot. So, here we are.”

“Just like, huh?”

“Well, you know,” he pulled you into a hug that you happily returned as you buried your face into his chest, breathing in the familiar scent of him, “like to an extreme. Love. I love you.”

“I love you too,” you pulled back and leaned up to kiss his cheek. You had tears in your eyes and he tenderly brushed them away with his thumb, “thank you.”

“Nothing to thank me for,” he insisted with a gentle bop to the tip of your nose, “now we can make good use of those vinyls you like to collect.”

“I knew they’d come in handy for a reason!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The two of you were sitting around the table, finishing off the last bits of dinner, stuffed but happy. So happy. You practically couldn’t keep the grin off your face as the two of you talked about anything and everything that crossed your minds. 

After a while, you grabbed the dirty dishes and cleared them off before putting them into the sink. Realistically, you probably should have washed and put them away, but you didn’t want to. Not tonight - that was a tomorrow problem. 

You’d heard Joel get up, but what you hadn’t heard was him grabbing a record and setting it up on the player. Not until you heard soft music flowing freely into the room. You made a small sound of surprise before turning around to find him standing there with a smile on his face and holding his hand out to you. You laughed softly, a fresh wave of emotion washing over you as you took his hand. 

“May I have this dance?” you bit your bottom lip between your teeth - a sight Joel was sure would kill him one - but nodded softly. How could you ever say not to him? You couldn’t. You’d known that for a long time.

“You may,” he took your smaller hand in his, the other hand settled on your waist as he started to sway with you to the music. He’d picked an older album, songs that were old when you were young, but that were soft and romantic. He might have been rough around the edges, but once you managed to break his walls down slowly, you realized he was a soft hearted, kind, gentle man. You were just glad he’d chosen you to give his heart to. 

You pressed yourself to him, resting your chin on his shoulder. His arms might have been your favorite place in the world - everything just felt so right with him. 

“You’re a real romantic,” you smiled sweetly at him and he didn’t even have it in his heart to tease you. Instead a deep rosy flush started to settle in his cheeks as he offered you a shy nod.

“It’s not like I can really take you on a date,” he sounded disappointed in that but you shook your head. Nothing really mattered, not when you had him, “so this while have to do for now.”

“Anything with you is perfect,” you insisted softly, “whether or not you believe it.”

“And I’m the romantic?” he tutted softly as you pretended to scowl at him, “baby.”

“Don’t ‘baby’ me,” you laughed, but neither of you loosened your grips. You would have been content to stay like this forever.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

It was getting late into the evening and the two of you were still listening to music, but you’d switched to something more upbeat. You were dancing around like fools, eating dessert in between stolen kisses and sweet touches. You were having so much fun that you almost hadn’t heard the knock at the door. 

You were about to open it when Ellie let herself in, her eyes widening in surprise at the two of you. You were both disheveled and bright eyed, drunk on laughter and kisses. 

“Hey Ellie Bean,” you grinned and wrapped her into a hug before she could say anything else. She looked between both of you before reaching for a piece of chocolate and popping into her mouth, “what’s up, sweetheart?”

“Nothing much,” she made a small sound of excitement at seeing the record player. It might have been vintage to you, but to her, a girl born into this reality, it was a whole other world, “wanted to see what you two were up to. I had a feeling you’d stashed all the candy away when I couldn’t find it anymore!”

“Had to save it for a rainy day,” you grinned as you held out your hand to her. She looked at it with a raised eyebrow for a moment before shaking her head with a huff of laughter and taking it, “now that you’re here, you can dance with us!”

“It’s not a rainy day,” despite her best efforts, she couldn’t keep the smile off her face, “and you two have officially lost it!”

“Let loose kid,” Joel took her hands and swung around with her and your eyes lit up with happiness at the two of them. There was no one you loved more in the world than these two people - your family. She was laughing, a sound that suited her beautifully as the two of them danced around like fools, “it’s okay to have fun sometimes, you know.”

“Oh?” she looked at him with both eyebrows raised high, “you might want to keep that in mind too.”

“You both should,” you cut in and took one of each of their hands, “we all should!”

“Fine,” they both murmured at the same time, such a father and daughter duo. 

You stopped for a moment, looking at both of them with a fervent intensity and feeling your heart swell happily. You gently took Ellie’s face in your hands before pressing a kiss to her forehead, “I love you, Ellie Bean.”

You turned to Joel before repeating the gesture, “and I love you too, Joel.”

“Fine, fine, fine,” she pretended to wave you off but you could see the smile on her face, “can we stop being sappy and get some more chocolate?”

“Only if you’re willing to fully commit to this dance party.”

“Deal,” both of them echoed as you looked between them in sheer amusement. 

“I’m in,” Ellie grinned. 

“I’m in,” Joel sighed, but it was a fond sound.

“Me too,” you promised them, “all in always.”

[multi-fandomfuckboy]

Stranger Than Fiction

Part 24: Tension

Billy Hargrove x Reader (Slowburn)

Part 1,... (Masterlist)...Part 24, Part 25 (Coming Soon)...

AN: Hope you guys like this one! Word Count: 5,112 Warnings: Language, Suggestive themes, panic attacks

Friday morning you wake up with the violent urge to vomit. You move on autopilot, cooking, dressing, brushing your teeth, kissing your mom goodnight. You can’t bring yourself to eat anything, not trusting your stomach to hold it down with the way it's doing somersaults. 

It doesn't help that when you got home last night all you could think about was Billy. You had to force yourself to strip off his clothes and take a shower, hoping it would calm you down. It didn’t. Everytime you closed your eyes you saw him, how he had looked lying next to you, how he had felt under you, his body against yours, his arms around you, his smell, his taste…

Needless to say, you didn't get much sleep. But somewhere in the night your thoughts shift from Billy to the upcoming exam. You know that you’re not ready. You’ve been studying constantly but you have the sinking feeling that it’s not going to be enough. 

When Steve picks you up he’s all smiles, excited for the last day before winter break. He tells you about the ski trip he and his family take every year to Colorado, but everything he says goes in one ear and out the other. Your mind swirls as all the information Billy has crammed into your mind over the past week tries to organize itself. The twisting in your stomach only gets worse when Steve pulls into the school parking lot, you can feel the panic growing, humming in the back of your mind that just won't settle. 

“Hey, I’ve got to head to the bathroom before class, I don’t feel good.” You say, unintentionally cutting Steve off. His eyes turn to you, looking you over, his happy expression quickly shifting into one of worry. 

“Oh, okay. Are you alright?” He asks, clearly concerned. 

“I’m fine. I just need a minute.” you tell him, not even able to give him a fake smile as you quickly open your door. You climb out of the car taking a deep breath, letting the cold air penetrate your lungs, before you start towards the school. Steve follows after you, rushing to catch up. The two of you enter the school, other students rushing around you, idle chatter filling the air, only adding to your growing anxiety.

“You sure? Do you need anything? I can run to Malvald’s really quick and get you something.” He offers, gently grabbing your arm. For some reason the touch feels suffocating to you, and without thinking you rip your arm out of his grasp whipping around to face him. 

“Jesus! I’m fine Steve! I just need a minute, alone!” You snap. Steve’s eyes initially widen in surprise at your outburst but he quickly ducks his head, trying to hide the hurt you know is clearly written on his face. You immediately wish you could take it back. 

“Right. I’m- uh- I’m sorry.” Steve says, taking a slight step back, shoving his hands into his pockets. 

“Steve, no. I’m just-” you try to explain, taking a step towards him. He takes another step back.

“It’s okay, really. I’m going to get to class.” Steve says, taking a step around you. He gives you a small smile that looks so forced in your eyes. “I hope you feel better.” He says, before turning fully and walking away. 

You watch him retreat down the hall, you don't miss how he hangs his head rubbing at the back of his neck as he goes. You feel like such a jerk. Steve was just trying to help and you bit his head off. You groan, heading towards the gym you ignore the few pairs of eyes that follow you as you go, having seen the interaction. You didn’t mean to get upset like that, it’s just that this test feels like it’s life or death. To make matters worse you should have been spending every last second studying instead of daydreaming about Billy. 

You pace back and forth in front of the lockers between the bathrooms outside the gym, anxiously running your fingers through your hair. 

You’re going to fail this exam, and then history all together. No college is going to want you with grades like that. Then on top of all that, you just pushed away one of your only friends because you couldn’t get a grip. You feel like a psycho. The anxiety and shame mix forming a pit in your gut, all of it bubbling up inside of you causing your hands to shake. This is ridiculous! You’ve helped save the world twice, nearly dying in the process multiple times, but a history test is what threatens to send you into a spiraling panic.  

“Fuck!” You yell, a burst of anger shooting though you. Turning you slam your foot into the metal lockers, filling the empty hallway with a loud bang. It hurts your foot but you kick out again, denting the metal. 

“Whoa there, loca! Angry and destructive are my things.” Billy’s lilting voice calls from your left. You don’t respond, taking off your bag and pulling out his food for the day. He comes to a stop in front of you. “Don't tell me I’ve been a bad influence on you.” He teases, his white teeth flashing in his usual smug grin. 

You keep your eyes down, not wanting him to see the tears of frustration that threaten to blur your vision. You’ve heard his thoughts on feeling sorry for yourself and are not in the mood for another rant about how useless it is. 

When you don't respond, Billy’s smile fades. You can feel his eyes scrutinizing your every breath. 

“You okay?” he asks, the teasing tone in his voice gone.

“I’m fine.” you say, keeping your voice firm trying to even out your rapid breathing. “Just take the food, I have to get to class.” you say, holding out the containers to him, fighting to stop the shaking in your hands. 

Billy takes a step forward, reaching out to take the food. Instead of grabbing the containers he grabs your wrist tugging you towards him, causing you to stumble forward almost running into him. 

“Hey!” You protest, getting your feet under you again. Before you can say anything else Billy’s hand is on your chin, forcing you to look up at him. His eyes are narrowed, his lips pressed into a thin line, looking over your face with such intensity you could almost confuse it with anger. But you’ve seen him angry and this is not that. 

“What’s going on? Why do you look like you’re about to be sick or burst into tears any second?” He asks. You’re surprised by the lack of judgment in his question but still you open your mouth to tell him that you’re fine. He cuts you off. “And don't give me any of that ‘I’m fine’ bullshit. We both know it’s a fucking lie so don’t even try it.” he tells you firmly.

You hate that your body's response to him looking at you like this, asking if you’re okay, demanding that you tell him if something is wrong, isn't anger. Instead more tears fill your eyes, blinking once they finally spill down your cheeks. 

Billy’s eyes widen momentarily. He lets go of your wrist and chin, using both of his hands to hold your face, wiping the tears from your cheeks. 

“I’m going to fail history!” You blurt out, pulling his hands away from you and taking a step back, wiping furiously at your face. 

“Is that what this is about?” Billy asks, disbelievingly. He shakes his head, a small smile pulling at his lips.

“I’m serious Billy!” you groan, glaring at him. “I’m going to fail history because my brain is fucking broken or something!” 

“Hey! Listen to me crazy, you’re not going to fail.” Billy says firmly, stepping towards you again, placing both of his hands on your shoulders. He keeps his eyes leveled on you, his voice steady. “You’ve got this. Do you really think I would have put as much time and effort into teaching you if I thought you couldn’t nail this thing?” he asks, lifting a brow. “You’re cooking may be good but I value my time more than anything.” he tells you seriously. You keep your eyes on him, searching his face for the lie.

“You’re going to pass.” he says with such conviction, you almost believe him. “But you can’t do anything until you calm down.” He tells you, his hands tightening slightly on your shoulders. “Take a deep breath, count to ten, and keep telling yourself ‘I’ve got this’. Okay?” he instructs. “Confidence is 90% mental. Let me see you do it.” You know his eyes are on you even as you close your eyes, filling your lungs with air, counting silently in your mind repeating the affirmation. 

“Do it again.” he orders. You repeat the process, slowly feeling your pulse regulate and the panic slither back from your mind. You hear Billy chuckle. 

“Good. I think oxygen is finally getting to your brain.” Billy says, causing you to open your eyes and immediately roll them. But part of you thinks he must be right, you are still nervous but the paralyzing fear you felt is nearly gone. You wonder where he learned that. If he has ever had to use it himself?

“Thank you, Billy.” You say, hoping he can see how much you mean it. 

“Don’t thank me yet, loca. You can do that after you ace this test.” he says, another smirk flashing his perfect teeth. Letting go of your shoulders with one more reassuring squeeze he takes the containers of food from your hands. Without another word, the warning bell rings, both of you head to your respective classes. 

The rest of the day you continue to repeat Billy’s calming routine whenever you start to feel your panic rising up. You practice all through lunch while you study, unable to find Steve who must still be upset about this morning. You know you will have to see him after basketball practice, there is no way he is going to leave you without a ride home. 

You are actively counting to ten as you walk towards history. You don’t notice Billy fall into step beside you only glancing at him when you feel his hand slip into yours. It’s subtle and in the bustling hallway it would look like he simply brushed against you. Neither of you stop walking as he leans in slightly.

“You’ve got this.” he says firmly, giving your hand a squeeze before letting it fall, both of you entering the class. 

During the exam you focus on remembering all the stories Billy told you. All the long nights of putting the pieces into a cohesive plot. You recognize a lot of the material even though there are a few questions that stump you. You have to take a few deep breaths when your classmates begin to rise one at a time as they finish. You're not even halfway done as they set their completed tests on Mr. Willson’s desk, exiting the classroom. Billy is among the first to leave. You watch him confidently swagger to the front setting his test down. His eyes meet yours as he walks to the door, he gives you a nod and a quick wink before exiting. 

You don’t finish until the last minute of class, reading and rereading every question checking your answers. It’s only you left in the classroom as you rise taking a deep breath walking to the front. Mr. Willson watches you, one brow raised as you place your test in front of him. 

“Grades will be posted by the end of the day.” he says stoically, taking your test and placing it on the large stack to his right. You exit quickly, the urge to snatch your test back just to check one more thing is overwhelming. 

Slinging your bag over your shoulder you exit into the busy hallway. You notice the palpable energy that fills the air, everyone excited for the last class before winter break officially starts. 

You spot Billy leaning against the lockers ahead of you, casually scanning the hallway with his practiced indifference. You wonder if he’s been waiting all this time for you. You start towards him, hoping to talk about the questions on the test you weren't sure about. His eyes meet yours but before you can reach him someone steps directly into your path. You stop short, nearly running directly into Steve’s chest. 

“Hey.” he greets you, a hesitant smile already in place. 

“Hey.” you respond, taking a small step back. You aren't sure how to act after what happened this morning. You want to apologize but the words are escaping you. There is a pause as both of you look at eachother, students hurry past, breaking around you like a rock in a stream. 

“About this morning, I-”

“I’m sorry about this mo-” you both say at the same time. It manages to break the tension, causing both of you to chuckle. It lightens your heart seeing a more genuine smile on his face. 

“Sorry, you go first.” Steve says, gesturing for you to continue.

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry for what happened this morning. I know that you were just trying to help.” You say, keeping your eyes on him despite the urge to look at your shoes. You have lost friends by not saying what needs to be said, and you would be damned if you let it happen again. “I’m sorry I snapped at you like that.” you say earnestly. Steve shakes his head at your words. 

“No, I’m sorry too. I know I can be a bit much sometimes. I didn’t mean to smother you or anything. I just want you to know if you ever need space I’m cool with that, I don’t want you to feel like you have to tell me everything.” He apologies, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. You smile slightly, feeling all the tension between the two of you dissipate. 

“Apology accepted.” you say extending your hand. “Friends?” you ask, lifting a brow. Steve glances at your offered hand, his smile growing. 

“Friends.” Steve confirms, taking your hand and giving it a firm shake. You both smile at each other and despite the crowded hallway you let him pull you into a tight hug. He squeezes you tightly, lifting you off the ground for a moment causing you to laugh. “Does this mean you’ll go to the Christmas party with me tonight?” he asks, smiling brightly down at you. You scoff, pushing him away to look squarely up at him. 

“Really Steve?” you ask, lifting a brow. You had told him ‘no’ weeks ago when he first invited you to the big party taking place at Bobby Mathers house. “Are you seriously using my apology as leverage to get me to go with you?” You ask, crossing your arms over your chest. Steve laughs, holding his hands up.

“I would never do something like that.” he protests, shoving his hands into his pockets. “It’s just, everyone is going to be there.” he tells you, his smile no longer reaching his eyes. You know he’s been self conscious about going to parties like this since everything with Nancy and Jonathan happened. Especially when it became public knowledge in the small highschool. “Don’t make me go alone.” he begs, giving you his best puppy eyes. 

Damn those brown eyes.

“Maybe.” you say. Steve’s grins ear to ear pumping his fist in the air in victory. 

“Yes!” He cheers.

“I didn’t say ‘yes’, Steve!” you say, shaking your head, reluctantly smiling as he backs away from you still grinning brightly. 

“I’ll pick you up at 8!” He calls, pointing at you before turning to jog down the hall. It’s less crowded now and you look around for Billy. He’s gone. 

The rest of the day passes quickly, hardly anyone paying attention to the last class of the day. When the final bell rings you can hear the cheers erupt around you, everyone rushing from their seats to the parking lot. You take your time packing your bag, instead of heading to the library to meet Nancy you head back to Mr. Willson’s room. You can’t leave until you know, for better or worse. 

When you reach his room, the door is open and you can see him seated at his desk, working through another stack of tests. You knock gently on his door, causing him to look up. He doesn't look surprised to see you standing there, setting down his pen as he watches you enter the room.  

“I thought you would be back for this.” He says, picking up one of the exams set aside. You hear him sigh as he looks over the front of the test. “I can tell you put a lot of effort into this.” he says, rising from his chair. Your stomach twists at his words. He looks so serious. Fuck. You failed. You knew it. You failed and he feels bad for you. You hold your breath as he extends the test out to you. Taking it, you slowly turn it over.

Your heart stops.

“Keep up whatever you’ve been doing and you might actually pass my class.” he says, a small smile almost imperceptible on his face. You could scream. You can't believe what you’re seeing, but right there, next to your name, in green ink, is a big ‘B-’.

You fucking did it.

Your grin is so big it actually hurts your face. 

“Thank you!” you exclaim, beaming up at him. You have to find Billy. Turning to leave you practically run for the door. 

“Hey! I still need that!” Mr. Willson yells. You stop, quickly rushing back to hand him the test before hurrying out. 

You’re absolutely buzzing with excitement. You rush through the halls, heading towards the gym. You feel the need to tell someone, anyone, about the test but there is one person in particular you want to share the news with. Reaching the gym you skid to a halt outside the double doors. Looking through the glass you see the basketball team scattered across the court getting warmed up for practice. You spot Billy’s curly blonde mullet almost instantly. You go to push through the doors but stop, seeing Steve stretching on the side of the court. 

If you go in there now to talk to Billy, Steve will freak out and knowing the two of them it will likely end in a fight. Your eyes turn back to Billy, he bends a knee tying his sneakers. Seeming to feel your gaze, he glances up. He looks somewhat surprised to see you standing there, his brows pulling together in confusion a beat later. 

You glance at Steve to make sure he hasn’t seen you at the doors before quickly gesturing for Billy to come outside. He nods once, confirming that he understands. He stands, saying something to one of his teammates before jogging across the gym towards you. 

You duck out of view moving to stand next to the bathrooms where you and Billy normally meet in the mornings. A minute later Billy exits the gym doors, he glances around a moment before spotting you and heading over. 

“Hey, what’s up?” He asks, looking you over, clearly confused by your presence. You’re practically bouncing with excitement, struggling to contain your smile. 

“I went by Mr. Willsons to see my grade, and guess what?” You prompt, biting your lower lip, losing the fight to keep your grin hidden. Billy’s expression loosens, rolling his eyes.

“You finally caught him shedding his lizard skin?” Billy asks, a small smile ghosting over his lips. The excitement bubbles over and you laugh.

“I passed!” You exclaim, your smile overtaking your face, impossible to hold back. Billy’s smile grows as he watches you bounce on the balls of your feet, the energy inside you needing a way out. “I mean I got a B minus but still!” you elaborate.

“You say that like it’s a surprise, loca.” Billy says. “Not to be that guy but, I told you so.” He teases. You laugh again, shoving his shoulder lightly. He catches your hand as you pull back, holding it in his. 

“One B minus doesn't mean you’re off the hook you nutjob.” He says. “You still have to pass the class and that means passing every other quiz and test before the end of the school year.” He reminds you. You nod, only letting that dampen your mood slightly. “There were a few things on this exam we didn’t get to cover, so tonight we’ll-” Your smile falters, causing him to stop short. “What?” He asks. 

“I won’t be able to come over tonight.” you tell him. It’s subtle but you see his smile fade, though he hides his feelings well. “Steve is dragging me to this party and-” The sound of voices approaching the gym doors cuts you off. More specifically, the sound of Steve’s voice.

Without thinking you grip Billy’s hand and pull him into the bathroom to hide. You hear a group come through the gym doors a moment later. You look around for a place to hide hearing the conversation grow closer. 

“Where the fuck is he?” 

“I don't know, he said he would be right back.” 

“Check to see if he’s taking a piss.” 

“I’ll go check the bathroom, you guys look around.” 

You mentally curse yourself. Of course they were just coming to get Billy. Why did you drag him in here with you? You turn to tell Billy to go but he drags you forward, ushering you into a bathroom stall.

“Stand on the toilet seat.” He orders. You do as he says, stepping up onto the toilet, bracing your hands against the wall for support. Billy stands in front of you, his hands hovering near your waist in case you fall. 

He doesn't look at you though. He keeps his gaze narrowed at the ground, his lips pressed into a firm line. The tension in his shoulders is obvious and from where you are positioned above him, you see the muscle in his jaw flutter as he clenches his teeth together. 

He’s pissed.

Looking at this objectively, you see why. You’ve just made it clear that you don't want to be seen close to him. And it’s glaringly obvious that you are hiding your connection with Billy from Steve. Your face burns. He knows you're hiding him. You try to tell yourself it’s for the best but part of you still wants to apologize. 

The bathroom door swings open, banging against the wall.

“Hargrove, are you in here?” you recognize Steve’s voice. You see the muscle in Billy’s jaw tick again before he responds.

“Fuck off Harrington!” He bites back. You hear Steve scoff, his sneakers squeaking as he walks further into the bathroom. 

“Trust me, I wish I could. But coach has us running plays and apparently you need to be there.” Steve explains, the irritation in his tone clear. Your pulse quickens as Steve’s sneakers come into view under the stall door. 

“Fuck.” Billy curses under his breath, shaking his head. You couldn’t have said it better yourself. When Billy doesn't respond after a moment, Steve only grows more irritated. 

“I swear to god if you're taking a shit! Hurry up!” Steve yells, pounding his fist on the stall door. The sudden sound makes you jump, your foot slipping from where you’re perched on the toilet seat, sending you careening towards the floor. Your arms flail out, banging loudly against the stall, as you try to catch yourself. 

Billy rushes forward, wrapping his arms around you to stop you from crashing to the floor. Your sudden weight threatens to take him down as well forcing him to pivot, pinning your body against the stall wall with his to keep you both upright. Your head collides with the metal, a pained sound escaping you, cut off by Billy's palm over your mouth. You inhale deeply through your nose, the throbbing in your head matching up with the pounding of your heart. 

“Jesus christ, Do you have someone else in there?” Steve yells pounding on the door again. Billy’s eyes meet yours. You can barely breathe with how his body has you pressed into the wall. Your legs are loosely wrapped around his waist, keeping your feet off the floor. The hand that's not covering your mouth is wrapped around your waist helping hold you upright. Your hands automatically clutch Billy’s shoulders, and from this position you are eye level with him. 

His eyes search yours for a moment then you see something click. He leans in, whispering in your ear, low enough that Steve can’t hear.

“Moan. Loud. Make it sound real.” He orders. Your eyes widen at the implication of his plan. You shake your head against his hand, your mind racing to come up with a different plan. You’ve never even kissed a boy! You don’t know how to moan like that, there is no way you can believably imitate-

Billy moves his hand from your mouth, sliding it over to gently cup the side of your face. You shake your head again, mouthing ‘I can’t, I don’t know how.” Hoping he understands.

He grits his teeth again, his eyes falling to your neck, you see his gaze darken. Before you can protest, Billy lowers his head, pressing his mouth to your throat. 

You can’t help the gasp of surprise at the sudden sensation. His mouth is open as he kisses down your neck. Your grip tightens on his shoulders as his tongue presses over your thundering pulse.

This is so different from the small kisses you gave him last night. This feels so much more intense, his touch spreading fire over your skin making your breaths come in short gasps. It’s like he’s going to devour you, and you want him to. You tilt your head into the hand that holds the side of your face. You feel his fingers slide into your hair, pulling it slightly, earning another gasp

Your body feels like it's vibrating, heat pulsing through your veins. His body presses you harder into the wall, his arm tightening around your waist as if he could pull you closer than you already are. When his mouth moves lower Billy sinks his teeth gently into the sensitive flesh of your neck. It’s all too much. Then using his tongue and teeth he pulls a bit of skin into his mouth sucking on it hard enough that it stings but in a way that makes your brain go fuzzy. A moan erupts from deep within your chest, your hands flying to his hair, either to pull him away or keep him there, you’re not sure. 

“Jesus christ.” you hear Steve grumble. You had almost forgotten what a precarious situation you’re in. To be fair, you can barely form a coherent thought as Billy finally pulls his lips off of you. 

“You going to stick around and listen to the finale, Stevie boy?! I didn’t think you were into that!” Billy taunts, sounding slightly out of breath.

“Alright, whatever! Just… hurry up!” Steve says, finally taking a step away. You listen as he quickly exits the bathroom. 

When he’s gone, the only sounds in the room are yours and Billy’s ragged breathing. His eyes search your face, his expression filled with something you can't quite place, but it stirs something deep in your gut.

What just happened?

His gaze flickers to your parted lips, the hand in your hair sliding down to hold the side of your neck. His tumb glides over the portion of your neck he had bitten into, you can feel him smear the remnants of his saliva as he moves over the spot, sending a shiver down your spine. 

Then he blinks a few times, rapidly, like he's just waking up. He takes a step back, his hands moving to your waist to steady you as your feet lower back to the ground. You keep your hands on his shoulders, not trusting your legs to hold you up with how they currently feel like jello. The darkness in his eyes is gone, replaced by something eerily close to fear as he scans your face. You know that you must be blushing like crazy but that’s the least of your worries given the circumstances. 

“That's all I could think of. Sex tends to make people uncomfortable enough to leave you the fuck alone, so I thought-” Billy explains.

“No, no. It was a good idea.” You say, finally finding your voice again. “I’m sorry I couldn’t fake it, I’ve just never-” You stop yourself from saying more. You feel his hands flex slightly where they hold your waist. 

“Are you okay?” He asks, his eyes still searching your face closely. You note how tense he seems, concern still clear in his eyes. You get the sickening sense that he’s getting ready for you to snap at him.

How could you possibly be upset? You did the same thing to him not 24 hours ago, and the only reason he had to do that was because you dragged him in here because you were worried about what Steve would think. If anyone should be upset, it’s him. All you can really think about is the way his mouth felt against you and his teeth-

“I’m… good.” You lie. Every instinct inside you is screaming at you to press him against the wall and find out what else his mouth can do. You shake your head, like that will clear the thoughts from filling your mind. You lower your hands from his shoulders, resting them on his forearms, his hands still on your waist. 

His eyes bore into yours, still searching, still waiting. After a moment he must see what he needs because he nods. 

“Alright, I’ll go out first and make sure your guard dog is gone, then wait 5 minutes to be sure the coast is clear before you come out.” He tells you. You only nod. 

Then, like he has to force himself, Billy pulls his hands away from you, yours falling away from him as well. He turns to the door, opening it slightly and peering out to make sure it’s empty before quickly ducking out of the stall. Leaving you alone with your racing thoughts. 

What just happened?

AN: I hope you guys enjoyed this one! Let me know what you thought of it, it's kind of new for me to write intimacy like this so please let me know what you think! Leave a like or a comment and you'll hear form me soon!

@official-starcourt-mall@lem0ns77@bethii1 @wysteria-arts @fanficfanatic204 @theshinyrock @spacedaddydinn @raidxny @emmyawards1 @lucxxy @leia9817 @wounded-writing @taisab02 @goblinpit @howlerwolfmax @kilvru3 @blueberry-birdie @flamewriterr @im-julessssss @tsukibaby1@mikeyswifie@superblyspeedydragon @let-love-bleeds-red @m-rae23 @msrawog @speakinglikeconstellations @taintedxkisses @pineapleavocado @hawkinsavclub1983 @arael-asuka @velvet-spider @extra-3motions @uniquecookiepainterbear @crimsonsabbath @mushy-mushroom04 @jevdidv @vermillionwinter@black-kitten-imagines@sammysgirl1997@fillechatoyante @chaoticbilly @tmriddler @stanseventeen@katzenwahnsinn@wisdomcrys@twoochickens @devrill @loadivine@hermankopusortizorsumshite@0bsessedwithfictionalcharacters @primalsnack @peachyaeger@royaltysuite @sunnmoonsstuff @sobleedstherose@harmonics0537 @urmom-0987 @halbhohehalluzination@ladyapplejackdnd

@tulipsandlulis@gremlinfuck @perilous-pasta @candy12110@ccanineal @idkwhyimhere18 @ronnasey @friendlyneighborhoodgrunge-hippy

@chansmaze@sammararaven@tanyaherondale@actual-mom-steve-harrington@harringtonfan4@trenko-heart@maackiimoo@haleypearce@orangechickenpillow @bekindmydarling-blog @urmomgov

@krazy99 @clenchedfist @renaroo123 @bee-1n-space @puppybittingotherpuppy @neonbanshee @cannonize @rhumphr4 @chansbackdoor @cg94 @untoldshortsofthefandoms

@joyisalover @hibyewhy @rosey96 @spacegirl7777 @longingforasteroids @tayhar811 @lizzy6 @simpforbuckyb @laneyspaulding19 @dimskies @nyenye

@awesomesauce-abbie @blueray222

@alexa4040 @blackholegladiator @strangerthings1983fan

@curlszx88 @bdudette @eddiessweetheart86 @haleybarnesx @decadentwastelandtrash @all-for-kpop

@sophiaj650 @dystopianhellscape @punchyprincess23 @luvrsbian

@myrcellavonswartzschild @awk-sauced

@laceypdf

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Hey Yves wanna see my wicked cool tattoo? 😏* pulls up my sleeve to show him a large bold ‘YVES’ tattoo’d on my forearm*

"Ah." Yves uttered softly as he bent down to inspect the ink work. But his eyes aren't focusing on the artist's skill, rather, the way your body reacts to something foreign invading it, like a tattoo. He took note of any redness, texture or anomalies on the artwork.

He already knew that you were about to get one, Yves was even flattered that out of all the words and quotes you considered, you preferred his name to be permanently a part of your body. He only wished that he could have been the one who worked with the tattoo gun, that way, he could obtain more data regarding your skin and flesh. Moreover, this was one of the few rare instances where he could (begrudgingly) further study your behavior towards pain while allowing himself to directly inflict it onto you.

Yves would have taken in all the reactions, micro or macro, while enduring the needles too, but alas, he has to rely on pixels from the hidden cameras and microphones. It's definitely better than nothing, but there was just so much wasted information without him being physically present there, up close and personal.

You weren't sure if Yves liked it. He's staring at it blankly while gently tracing the pads of his fingers against your bare skin. It felt tingly.

"I'm flattered." He smiled. Yves knew you got this just to see how he would react, not necessarily because you wanted to be branded with his name. It's plain. Yves looked back up to you.

"What do you think about it?" He asked, somewhat catching you off guard. So you started to explain, fumbling over your words but pointing out the obvious: you wouldn't have gotten it if you didn't like it.

He hummed in response. Caressing your forearm tenderly as you watched him with anticipation.

Maybe you expected him to freak out, Yves seemed like the type of person to be discouraging permanent body modifications. You thought he would disapprove of it, at least to a certain degree.

But you're unsure what to make of his attitude, he's ominously vague about it. So you decided to ask him directly about what he thinks, straight to the point and no fluff.

Your direct question was met with a loving kiss on the forehead.

"You're adorable." He murmured. Cuddling you against him. Instinctually, you wrapped your arms around his torso while he went on to run his manicured fingers through your hair.

"What else can you tell me about it?" He whispered while holding you close.

You stuttered, you didn't know how to answer that. So you hesitantly told Yves you have nothing else to say.

He stayed silent and continued with his affectionate touches. Somehow, you felt uncomfortable not saying more, so you began grasping at straws. Telling him about how you love him so much, and you wanted to have his name on you for some reason.

You elaborated more than you needed to, somewhat cringing at yourself the deeper you fall into this chatty spiral. But you kept on going because it increased your unease when you stop talking.

While you're distracted and sounding like a broken record, Yves took the opportunity to usher you to the living room sofa. He rummaged through your bag, which is a normal occurrence on its own, so you never stopped to question why he is going through your belongings hourly.

He pulled out a tube of tattoo aftercare ointment that was given to you by the parlor, unscrewed it open and dispensed a pea sized amount of cream onto his fingertips.

Yves wordlessly urged you to continue blabbering by body language alone, showing that he is very interested in what you have to say and subconsciously encouraging you to overshare as usual.

He applied the cream onto your tattoo, alleviating it of any itchiness or soreness. The entire time, latching onto every word you said and permanently etching them into the sulci his brain.

It didn't even register in your mind that Yves knew how to care for a fresh tattoo despite not having one himself. You didn't realize how he automatically knew what to do, where to find it and what to use, as if he was there when the tattoo artist had explained it to you.

You simply accepted that Yves knew what was good for you and allowed him to act accordingly without your explicit permission.

You accepted that Yves will take care of everything.

[sjywrites]

Hii can I request Sophia x reader academic rivals? 🥺 u can do whatever u want w the plot pretty much please and thank u so much <3 :)

༊*·˚ ACADEMIC RIVALS LOVERS?

𝓢ophia 𝓛aforteza x 𝓖n!reader. (no pronouns used). 𝓖enre. fluff, angst if you squint 𝓢ypnosis. our two favourite academic rivals have a lil fight, but the situation turns bad, and people realize their feelings. 𝓦𝓒 . 824 𝓒𝓦 . mentions of being hospitalised (sophia), a little angsty!

𝓝ote! this is a little messy since I wrote it during one of my breaks, but please lmk if you want like a part two cuz I really liked this plot!

---

This is purely fiction and is not meant to interpret how the idols act in real life!

,, not proofread + english is not my first language ! ೃ⁀➷

At this point it didn’t even matter if you were better than everyone, you just had to be better than her. It started off very simple, both of you wanted to be better than everyone, academically that is. Eagerly waiting to get tests back and see who got a higher score, a smug grin on one's face when they got a better result than the other. No harm in that right? Wrong, that’s what started all of this.

Sophia walked towards me with her head held high, her uniform as neat as ever and her hair styled in a way making her look almost angelic. Wait, what? “What were your results?” She said, slamming her paper on top of my desk, I shook out of my daydreaming to answer her. “96.” I said while looking down in my maths book, trying to solve an equation but still focusing on what she would respond. She looks away and a teasing smirk spreads on her lips, and moves the finger that covered her results, 97. “Guess I’m just better than you huh?” She said proudly, staring down at me “Just because you got one point more than me doesn’t mean you’re better than me.” I said, pouting a little at her accusation.

Lately I’ve been feeling kind of… weird? Even if Sophia gets a higher score than me, I can’t find it in me to give a fuck. “Well, you’ve been slacking off a lot lately, I’ve gotten higher scores than you on the last four tests. So, I think that makes it obvious who's smarter!” Sophia states like it was the most obvious answer to what I said. Staring at her for a moment, I reply. “I've been busy okay, not everyone has that much free time to spend on studying, and you're talented in general, no wonder you get high scores” She looks shocked at my statement, then she smirks a little, “Did you just admit that I'm smart?” She looked proud in some way or another, “Not what I meant Sophia, but whatever floats your boat.” I grab my things from the desk and walk outside the classroom to my locker, a little frustrated at the whole situation. I did miss her response,

“I study that much so you won't think I'm stupid.”

A week goes by, no Sophia in sight. She missed two assignments, she's usually here every day. Even if she's sick, which I don't get why she does, but still. Did something happen to her? Was it something I did?

“You've been zoning out for the past like, three periods, what is going on with you today?” Lara, my best friend asks. “Do you know where Sophia is?” I ask, not really thinking before I ask. “Why do you want to know, don't you guys like, hate each other?” She looks at me with a very questionable look, suspecting something I cannot grasp, “Yes? No? I don't know Lara, but do you know where she is?” I say, a little confused and concerned. She looks at me with sad eyes before replying, “Y/N, Sophia got really sick out of nowhere, I heard she's at the hospital.” My eyes blew wide at the shocking news, why didn't she tell me? No, why would she do that? We're not even friends.

—

Am I really doing this? I think to myself as I open the hospital doors and stumble up to the kind-looking man in the lobby. I strike up a casual conversation with him as he guides me to a room, I thank him quickly before he scurries away.

There in the little window on the door I see her, Sophia's sitting down on the bed. Her hair is a mess and her clothes look ridiculous, it looks like she hasn't slept for a few days too. I gently open the door and her gaze falls upon me, it's easier to see her face now. She looks tired, really tired. “Hey…” I say, she looks away from me and cuddles up in her sitting position. “What are you doing here?” she tries to sound annoyed, but it just comes out in a tired huff. “I heard what happened, I… was worried about you. I brought some notes from the classes you missed.” She looks shocked at my confession, she relaxes her posture and her gaze becomes soft. “Thank you… I really appreciate it.” She smiles a little as she grabs the papers I handed her, our hands touching softly.

I look at her, really look at her. For the first time actually having time to admire how pretty she looks, how perfect her flaws are. “I just came to give you that… so if you don't need anything else, I'll go.” I turn around to walk away, grabbing the door knob and turning it around, “Wait! Will you… please stay with me a little longer, I need it.

I need you.”

this is so messy I'm sorrrrryyyy!! I wanted to post something today at least :((

[joesheistyy]

Busted on Ice

This was inspired by me busting my ass on Wednesday because of ice and still having to go to class <3 yes, my ass has a bruise and so does my arm and my ego but I promise I’m fine and nothing is broken :)

——

Wintertime in Cincinnati showed no remorse to anyone. The weather would switch between mid 60s to low 20s within a day, and who knew if it was going to rain, sleet, snow, or be sunny.

You were one to study the weather, checking it multiple times a day, almost like it was social media. For the past few days, the forecast had been predicting ice and maybe snow. Or snow and maybe ice. It could be anything.

Both you and Joe were not fans of the cold. A nice, crisp 60° day was your favorite, and same with Joe. So this cold weather system coming through made you want to hibernate until it was done with.

“Do we have everything we need in case we lose power?” Joe asked as he entered the living room to see you charging your computer on your lap while playing the Sims.

“Yeah I think so. I mean we’ve got plenty of blankets cause of my blanket addiction and we’ve got non perishable foods so we should be fine,” you reply, not looking away from your game.

“So I guess we just wait it out now, don’t we?” He asks, sitting down next to you.

“Yup, sounds about right,” you said with a shrug.

As the day went on, the weather got worse. Going from rain to sleet to snow and back to sleet. You and Joe spend most of the day cuddled up on the couch, avoiding the cold at all costs.

You two headed to bed in hopes that the roads and ground wouldn’t be as bad as the meteorologists had predicted.

As the sun rose the next day, you and Joe made sure to enjoy the warmth of your shared bed as long as you could. You had plans with your friends and you’d be damned if you missed them. First, yoga class, then mimosas.

You began to get ready in the bathroom as Joe stayed in bed, turning on an episode of SpongeBob. You put on your favorite lululemon leggings and align top and tossed one of Joe’s sweatshirts on top.

Joe got out of bed and decided to remote start the car for you as you made your water bottle. You bundled up and grabbed your bottle, heading out through the garage. The car was partially defrosted, but you always left with plenty of time for situations like this.

You stepped out from the safety of the dry garage, but what you didn’t know was that the ground below was frozen solid, yet clear.

You hit the ground, falling on your right arm.

Crack

The most blood curdling scream left your mouth.

Joe came running outside the moment he heard your scream. You were sitting on the ground, clutching onto your arm. Your clothes becoming wet. You were in shock, your eyes filled with tears.

“Oh my god y/n, what happened?” Joe questioned, pulling you carefully into the garage. Your butt slid along the ice until it hit the hard concrete garage floor.

“This fucking piece of shit weather,” you cried out, grasping your arm and trying to make it feel even the slightest bit better.

“Baby, you gotta be more careful,” he said as he pulled you upright, trying to avoid the arm that you fell on.

“Joe I heard a crack and it’s numb, I literally can’t feel anything right now,” you croaked out, looking up at him with fear in your eyes.

Joe gave you the same look, a look of shock as to the status of your arm. “Babe, we gotta take you to urgent care or something,”

“I refuse to leave this house because of this fucking ice,” you yelled, walking back into the house, still cradling your arm.

Joe followed you inside, pulling out his phone to call the team doctor to see if he had any suggestions. You sat on the couch, grabbing at your arm and trying not to move it because of the immense pain it caused. You were still in shock, your body language radiating pain.

“Okay the team doc said to take some Tylenol…” Joe trailed off as he frantically walked throughout the kitchen, “oh I know what would help…ice,” Joe laughed out, thinking he was being funny.

“Not fucking cool, Joseph. Tylenol isn’t gonna help the fact that I probably just broke my fucking arm. Quit being such an asshole,” you barked out, frustrated that you were in so much pain and at the comment that Joe made. Glares were exchanged between the two of you.

“You didn’t let me fucking finish, y/n,” Joe responded with a harsh tone. The last thing you needed was to bicker with Joe, yet here you were.

When it came to injuries, you were usually pretty self sufficient. Bandaids and sprains didn’t shock you in the least, but this time around was different. You weren’t used to being in this much pain and shock, so of course you were going to be frustrated and angry.

“The doctor is gonna make his way over here to take a look at you. He said he’s safe to leave his house and not slip and break a bone in the process,” Joe snipped at you. That had your blood boiling, only making things worse. At this point, you gave Joe the silent treatment until the doctor arrived.

The doctor came in and took a look at your arm. It was swollen up pretty bad and your range of mobility was lacking. He gave you some pain pills and a sling and said that when it’s safe for you to leave to go see an orthopedic doctor.

Joe walked out with the team doctor, having not said much the whole time he was there.

“Let’s get you up to bed,” Joe says, outstretching a hand to you to lead you upstairs.

You follow Joe, he had gotten you a bottle of water to set on your bedside. You took Joe’s pillow and set it under your arm for support.

“I’m gonna go get some stuff from the store,” Joe says as he walks out of the room “text me if you need anything,”

Your pain medication made you drowsy, so you decided to take a nap. You were upset with Joe for talking to you the way he did, and you were upset with yourself for much more than just falling.

Upon Joe’s arrival back home, he put the groceries away. He felt immense guilt for the way he got snippy with you. He didn’t want to admit that your fall made him anxious, but he didn’t mean to be so short either.

Not much can make up for the fact that your arm was most likely broken, Joe was upset with you, and you missed yoga and mimosas. You were a sucker for mimosas.

But, Joe got you some things in hopes of making you feel better. A bouquet of flowers because he felt guilty for being short with you, a bottle of nice champagne to make up for the missed mimosas, and some of your favorite snacks. He even got you a new blanket. Sometimes, Joe loved to spoil you. You hated it because you always want to give in return, but he always says no. This was one of those instances where you wouldn’t be upset with him for spoiling you. Life seemed like it couldn’t get much worse.

Joe arranged the flowers and staged them in the middle of the island. He set the grocery bags of gifts on the island so he could slowly pull them out one by one to show you what he got you. He climbed the stairs to find you still asleep, partially sitting up to rest your arm comfortably. He sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked your non-broken arm to wake you gently.

“Hi baby, how’s your arm feeling?” He asked as your eyes fluttered open.

“Terrible,” you groaned out a bit. Joe reached over to grab the sling to help stabilize your arm. He lifted the blankets off of you and held out his hand to help you out of bed.

You followed him downstairs to see a beautiful arrangement of flowers and a few bags full of gifts. Joe pulled out a barstool and assisted you up.

“I feel bad for everything that happened today so I got you flowers and other goodies,” he said with a small smile, leaning in to give you a sort of side hug.

“Joey, that’s very sweet, thank you,” you leaned into his hug with a smile, taking a nice whiff of his detergent.

“Lemme show you what I got!” He said excitedly, walking to the opposite side of the counter to give you a haul. He always loved when you showed him what you got, but the roles being reversed was just as fun.

Joe showed you all the things he got, making sure to continue to apologize about being so short with you. And the comment he made about ice helping really set you off, and he knew that. He hated that you were in pain and he wished he could take it away.

Joe made sure to take the best care of you that he could. He made sure to serve you all the mimosas you wanted and drape you in your new blanket, along with cooking you all your favorite things. And, of course, give you all the snuggles and love in the world and try his hardest to keep you out of pain.

——

This idea was much cuter in my head 🫠 anyway, it’s something for you all! I’ve got more ideas churning and so many great pictures of Joe that are inspiring me!! Let’s hope I can manage to put content out while dealing with classes 😂 this is like my way to detox and settle down and I love it. I love y’all!!

[cant-get-worse-than-this]

Introduction post!

Basics

Hi!!!

My name is Kesar (or any other variant of the name Caesar is fine to call me!) and I am 14. I am neurodivergent. I am an Asian-European (India and Sweden!), Hindu, and my pronouns are he/they!

Interests and Likes

I have a hyperfixation/special interest (I don't know which to use because I'm in denial about being autistic LMAO) of the Mediterranean, mostly Italy and Spain but also France, Portugal, Egypt, Greece, etc!

Languages

Due to my interest, I have taught myself Italian all on my own and I study Spanish at school since 2020, so I can speak them both at a good level.

All of the languages I speak as well as some more info on my history with them:

Swedish, I speak it every day and a bit at home

Hindi, I speak it every day at home with my family

English, I speak it here and I consume a lot of English media. Also I went to an international school for a couple of years.

Spanish, I've been learning it at school. Ever since I started learning it I've been the best in the class (this is very much a flex, I am very proud of the fact). I speak it at a very good level but I'm not close to fluent.

Italian, I am very proud of that I speak it because I learnt it all on my own using primarily music. I started learning it in 2021 but then took a LONG break for almost 2 years and in 2023 I got back on track and learnt it so well I'm almost at the same level at it as I am at Spanish hahaha

French, as I speak Spanish and Italian it wasn't that hard for me to get a grasp at French. I'm definitely not good at it and am best at written French, not spoken, but I understand enough to say I know it. Also, I can carry a conversation in French so. Yeah. I also really like Lupin.

Urdu, as I speak Hindi I understand Urdu well. Of course there are words I don't know, but since I understand so much of it and I speak it better than I speak Spanish or Italian I had to include it.

Music

My favourite song artists are Marco Mengoni and MIKA. They are my top 2. I love them so much.

I also listen to Mahmood, Måneskin, Queen, The Lonely Island, Lady Gaga, Kali Uchis, Megan Thee Stallion, Veronica Maggio, Shreya Ghoshal, and a lot more.

Apart from that I like English music from 2000 to the late 2010s. I also like Hindi music, rap (i listen to a LOT of Megan Thee Stallion, she's such a queen), Eurovision (although I am not supporting them this year due to them including Israel, Free Palestine🇵🇸), Hispanic music, Francophone music, Italian music and Swedish music. I also enjoy classical, both South Asian and European.

TV

I love TV! My favourites are dramedies. I like comedy a lot. My favourite type of show would be sitcoms because I understand them and I grew up with them and I like their humour. Here are TV shows I very, very strongly like in no particular order:

Psych, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Community, 1899, Mythic Quest, Lupin, Monk, and probably more that I just don't remember right now.

I have also watched a lot of other things, but this is all that comes to mind.

There are films that I really like, and most of them I have watched more than a few times. Like there were literally periods when I would just keep rewatching these:

The Kung Fu Panda film series, The Hotel Transylvania film series, The Lorax (specifically the Italian dub), The Shrek film series, and once again probably many more.

Other stuff I like:

Doraemon, Spider-Man: Into The Spiderverse & Across The Spiderverse, Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhaan (2020), Smiley (2022), Saiki K (TV series, I haven't been able to read the manga :/), etc.

Books

Mostly I read fact books, in middle school the librarian hated me for (metaphorically) eating up all the books on ancient Egypt, but I also have a few books I really like!

I love Rick Riordan. My favourite from him is definitely The Kane Chronicles but I also like PJO. I'm TKC all the way, though.

I also like Geronimo & Thea Stilton as well as Diary of a Wimpy Kid. They give me comfort.

I have a lot of queer books I bought for the sole reason of them being queer but I haven't read them yet hahahaha. I'm almost finished with Friday I'm In Love by Camryn Garrett!

I am also reading Babel by R. F. Kuang and Marina by Carlos Ruiz Zafón!

Playlist time!

My Marco Mengoni playlist:

My Brad Bakshi playlist:

My Trobed playlist:

My Braddavid playlist:

My StottleMonk playlist:

That is all I can really come up with right now, but I will probably edit this soon! I'm not very good at stating what I like and all of that because I'm always scared I'm not telling everything or that people won't understand how I like it and stuff LMAO so don't be surprised if I take this post down :( I'm trying to get better though, so I'll keep it up!

[jackwolfes]

I would love to start writing grishaverse fics but I'm worried about not getting the characterisation correct. I've started with a modern au, which was maybe not the best plan considering it's probably harder to keep the dialogue in character when they're not in their normal setting. Any words of wisdom? Since you seem to be so inherently good at nailing all of the crows 😅

your point on AUs is interesting because 1) i am a big big AU writer and 2) i know some people insist that AUs are always automatically less in character which is just emphatically not true and is often times good old fashioned pretentiousness

but i would say that the key thing to AU writing is understanding the characters in their entirety, as well as how their character changes depending on the situations they're in, and adjusting accordingly. i run into this problem all the time with wylan! so in AUs where his entry into the barrel is entirely different i have to reevaluate how like, scared for his life he'd be basically, and how that changes how he relates to other people

for another example - the way matthias changes as a character in SOC is tied to how far away he is from his (for lack of a better term) cult, paired with the love he is met with from nina and the evidence of "goodness" from grisha (jesper & kuwei). so then that becomes: what is the au equiavalent of the druskelle? how long has it been since he's left them? how long has he known nina, has he met jesper/kuwei, has he had closure yet against brum?

i also think it's suuuuper important with AUs to remember that in the books they are all teenagers and all act like teenagers. if you're writing aged up AUs, certain ways they act will necessarily be different - ie all of them, at one point or another, think way too highly of themselves and/or act like immature gits that don't know how feelings work: if you're aging them up you'll have leeway to temper them a bit. interestingly i think the netflix show does this really well, with wesper especially - wylan isn't flushing constantly when jesper flirts with him because he's already a sexually active adult, etc. it's an interesting case study wrt how to age characters up and keep the essence of who they are

anyway i have wildly different confidence levels for the different crows so don't like, take this as gospel, but if you're interested i jotted down a few of the key things that i keep in mind about each of them below the cut:

mh

matthias is funnier than anyone gives him credit for. he doesn't always mean to be but comedy + matthias = winner

if you're writing early matthias: he is scared and lost and angry. he is in a new country he does not know the language of, freshly betrayed by someone he was never supposed to trust, and kicking himself for being stupid enough to "fall for her tricks" (while also being so profoundly in love that he is angry all over again that he is still "being tricked")

if you're writing later matthias: he is just. fucking. trying. he can see that there is something hopeful on the horizon and has realised that he wants it and will do what he can to make steps towards it. i really like writing matthias as clueless but well meaning, where he's a bit thick about a lot of things but really wants to do better! like your cishet uncle at christmas who is REALLY trying to get your pronouns right because he knows it means something to you but just doesn't have a grasp of how they work, yknow?

his faith is SO important to him, especially as the series goes on and he starts doubting everything. when he's in fjerda he's embedded in it but when he's in kerch, it is the literal only thing he had keeping him going. when he joins the crows, he clings to it as if to prove to himself that not everything he learnt was entirely wrong until he can reconcile religion with loving grisha

wve

if you aren't familiar with the signs of autism, research them. once you have, congratulations! you now have a guide to writing wylan van eck.

wylan is infinitely meaner than anyone gives him credit for. i dont mean snarky, i don't mean bitchy, i mean MEAN. early on, he says some fucking savage things without any real consideration for how jesper feels because he just fundamentally hasn't had real kindness from anyone in so long, which means he doesn't know that he doesn't have to expect cruelty back.

he does not want to be doing anything illegal. he'll do it but won't fucking like it - except he will also at the same time be very prideful about what he's doing. so he'll do it, and won't fucking like it, but by god will he do it well and make sure everyone around him knows how clever he is. he doesn't brag, exactly, but he WILL be smug and will not skimp on theatrics when needed.

the thing that made wylan click for me was someone saying that he is not SHY, but he is RESERVED. at no point is he really actually timid. he gets flustered, and fear/anxiety for his life is fucking rampant, but he is at no point shy with his opinions. he just refuses to show his whole hand and is very much like kaz in this respect.

early wylan is just having the worst fucking week, all the time. like every day is the worst day of his life: he's tired, hungry, scared, anxious, belittled, lonely. a part of him genuinely believes that he'll be able to go home again, which makes him resentful of the how bad his life in the barrel is.

underneath all of this wylan is still a profoundly hopeful character. i think one of the most interesting things about him is that he has an unhindered belief that the world is at it's core good, even though it also has bad things in it, and a fundamental unwillingness to settle for other people's cynicism. he's not stupid, he's not deluded, he's barely even optimistic, but throughout the series he genuinely does seem to believe that there will be a happy ending in some way or another.

jf

if you aren't familiar with the signs of adhd………….

jesper to me is just doing his very best to get through life without feeling any negative emotion ever for any longer than he has to. much like matthias, he is lost and scared and angry - but instead of channeling this into a pseudo-facist military cult he tries to stop feeling the bad feelings as quick as he possibly can. he has learnt that bad feelings = the worst, and the way to deal with that isn't to embrace them to understand them and move on [because he has also learnt that "bad" means "should be hidden"] so he tries to not feel them at all. he does not dwell on his mother's death or his father's insistence that a beautiful part of himself is a curse. he squishes it down and tries to cover it with gambling and flirting and anything else that'll get him through - except those coping mechanisms always make him feel worse, which he tries to bottle up and cover with a joke and a smile…... etc etc etc

to emphasise: when he covers things up, he does so in the biggest, boldest and most public ways as if that'll prove to everyone else, as well as himself, that he's fine. he doesn't shut up, he's a snarky asshole, and his whole thing is that he refuses to stop moving because stopping let's the bad feelings catch up.

he is both incredibly cynical and incredibly optimistic, which is a strange juxtaposition to get your head around but makes him really interesting! he's described as having "reckless optimism" and an insane hope that everything will pull through - but so often when he talks to wylan he is utterly jaded about wylan's way of seeing the world.

jesper doubts himself and his talents fucking massively. whereas a lot of the other crows are almost too confident about their abilities to do things, jesper doesn't really put stock into his talents! and this again comes down to the fact he has fundamentally not taken the time to learn and understand why he has the talents he has, and only gets to that point at the end of CK.

ig

inej to me is just very teenage girl, by which i mean: she is funnier than anyone gives her credit for, she likes to be right, she crushes on idiot boys [and gets annoyed about it] and truly cherishes her friendships. she is a TEENAGE GIRL, not an all-caring insightful mother figure, and when she supports her friends she leans on them in return just as heavily.

related to that she is also infinitely more like… proud than people give her credit for. this is also similar to wylan IMO but inej takes great care in whatever she does, and while doesn't necessarily try to get all eyes on her, she DOES want the people she's manipulating to know that SHE is the one in control of their fates. but for all she holds power over other people and the next steps in her life [which is key re: taking control and autonomy of her life in the aftermath of her assault and displacement] it is always chased with the knowledge that at the end of it, her saints have the final say and final power.

i think it's also really important that she just does not believe herself to be a good person. like she doesn't, but she's making peace with that and spends a lot of time trying to atone for that by making the world better than she found it.

nz

nina is a notoriously hard character to get right [and also i haven't read king of scars so can't comment on anything but how she's written in SOC/CK] but one key thing about nina that i think jumps out is that she is just. tired. she's so tired by the start of soc because she does not like life in the barrel. she doesn't even like ketterdam! she fucking hates it! she's doing what she has to to find matthias but does not WANT a life in the barrel. her key goal and motivation is to fucking skip town as fast as possible.

it's also key IMO that she has had a very similar upbringing to matthias. it's very easy to see his indoctrination, and i wouldn't say that the ravkan's are quite as bad as the fjerdans considering ideologies and tactics, but as the books go on nina very much discovers that the way she was raised [taken from an orphanage without a say, raised to be a soldier, told to never question anything/step out of line/consider an alternate view] was also not great, which is why she decides to leave and make change on a local level

nina doesn't really hold back what she thinks, especially when she's upset with someone: she will just tell kaz someone they're being stupid straight to their face.

related to that, she is just low-level irritated at kaz for every waking moment of the series

kb

he's not mean, but he's a sarcastic fucker and incredibly blunt about the truth of things. he genuinely does not care about hurting other people's feelings [key with wylan tbh but seen with all of the other crows]

he doesn't volunteer information if he can help it: he likes to have the upper-hand and the last word, but will never show all of his cards until he is absolutely 100% without a doubt certain he's won something

he would rather be shot in the head than show true vulnerability [see: the "who is jordie" conversation]

that bitch loves a grand gesture. he doesn't have a love language so much as he only knows how to express his feelings by doing things for people [see: buying his crush a big boat]

[nelissecrectplace]

Void

ch5

neteyam x reading

Tw: Death, dissociation, war

word count: 6k

language: ‘evi- child (affectionate)

descriptions: Peace, Happiness, and friendships can only last so long. You would have never guessed you would be a victim of the sky people’s first act of war. Suddenly your reality is shifted as you experienced how cruel life is. With the threat of sky people upon you every na’vi must train to be a fighter no matter how much your father does not approve of you picking up a bow.

———————

Light brightened up the pod as morning broke. Groggy you sat up taking in your surrounding. As your eyes adjusted you noticed that the presence next to you was gone as there was no one but you in an empty pod. You felt lonely but you also felt the fear from yesterday arise. With a need for answers you quickly washed up and headed out of the sullys home to the healing tent. You prayed the Mo’at would be there.

“Hello my child” Your prayers were answered when the old woman’s voice met your ears. Your eyes set on her as you muttered a greeting.

“You are troubled.”

“I am, I do not know what is to come, I do not know if the hunting party is safe my worries seem endless.”

Sitting next to her you felt comfort as her old eyes stared into yours. Her hands grasp yours as you felt comfort flood into you from the simple jester.

“The clan will survive this, just like we did all those years ago, we will send the sky people back to where they belong.”

You wanted to believe it was true as she spoke with such certainty but the possibilities still plagued your mind. Mo’at almost as if reading your mind softly glided her thumb over the hand you held onto, providing what comfort she could. The na’vi was always helpful and even gave you a brief update on the new rules of the clan and what to expect from the future.

Almost as if on cue the returning horn rang as she finished. Quickly you jumped to your feet, running to the hunting party. They had returned early because of the situation and you could not be happier. Tears breached your eyes as you saw your fathers figure through the small crowd. As if you hadn’t seen him in months you crashed into his arms relief flooding you.

“I was so worried.”

“I am here ‘evi, we are all here.”

A comforting hand patted your head as he spoke. Kiri soon approached her four finger hand making comforting circles on your shoulder blade. Other na’vi had similars exchange as relief flooded the clan knowing they had not lost anyone. The sky people had every na’vi on edge.

Things around the clan started to change rapidly after the night of the return. Your dear friend Tseo and many other male na’vi were torn from their other tasks and put on warrior duty. This made the stress of the woman in the clan increase and many young na’vi had to begin to help in place of some of their study time. You had already completed most of your healing lessons so you gathered much more and stocked up on many herbs.

You and Neteyam had not talked about the conversation but your relationship had improved. You would often talk to the boy in the sign language you learned as he was usually stuck to his fathers hip either helping to plan future attacks or training warriors. He would often get ‘injured’ and come to the healing tent for your treatment and you couldn’t help but be amused by his faking.

“Aww did did someone get a boo-boo?” Jokingly you walked over to the the boy at the entrance of the tent.

“Yeah, hurts real bad y/n” You could tell he was on the verge of laughing as he spoke. Holding up his hand he showed the tiny scratch across the back of his hand and couldn’t help but let out a small giggle. You held his hands in yours as you brought it to your lips kissing his small scratch. His tail whipped around behind him as he looked at you as with soft eyes.

“All better” Lacing your hands together you looked up with a smile.

“You truly can cure anything.” Pulling you into him the boys hands latched around your waist. He dug his fingers into your side as you squirmed beneath him laughing and trying to escape.

“Stop distracting my student Neteyam!” The boys hand left you as he got a wack on the back of the head. Covering your mouth you stifle a laugh as the Mo’at walks in. Neteyam put his hands up in surrender as he signs a goodbye leaving the tent. Your amusement did not last as a strict yellow eyes soon landed on you making you turn back to your work immediately.

Besides healing your time was also spent gathering. You did not hate gathering fruits because Zey was always with you. Gossip and jokes would fuel your time with her. You always had something to talk about as the gatherers only left high camp three times a week because of the new rules. Because of this gathering days were longer as more fruit needed to be collected. That morning you did not think much would change as you set out with your friend.

“Morning y/n”

Bumping hips with you Zey announced her presence as she walked along side you.

“Good morning!” Greeting her with a smile you walked towards her Ikran. You always flew down with Zey because you did not have an Ikran of your own. She was more than happy to fly you around especially since you two always seems to stray from the main group finding the tastiest fruits.

Just like any other gathering day you and Zey eventually started to stray from the group going on your own path as you walked into the forest. Your laughter could be heard from all around as you spoke with the girl.

“Tseo is going to get so flustered when you give him a courting gift too!” Yelling up to the girl you admire the bracelet she had tossed down with the fruit. She wanted you to see the bracelet she had been working on.

“I know right!” Yelling back she tossed town utumauti. You skillfully caught it and added to the basket you had set on the ground.

“I’ll store it in my pack until you come down!”Yelling up you informed Zey as you placed the bracelet in your pouch

“I have something for you too catch!” Your eyes shot up as she threw a thin bracelet toward you from the branch she sat on. She looked beautiful as the sun broke through, the light shining on her features. “It’s for your ankle I have a matching one!”

Pointing to her foot she motioned to the woven ankle bracelet that matched yours. Admiring the beautiful rocks and pebbles in you tied the bracelet around your ankle.

“It’s beautiful Zey!” Your voiced seems to echo through the trees as Zeys joyful laugh could be heard. Suddenly you heard no more laughter as the girls attitude seems to change. You began to notcie why as all noise seemed to slowly fade from the forest around it. It was too silent.

Your ears perked up trying to sense the slightest movement as Zey did the same. Her once relaxed body was now stiff as she stood up straight on a branch scanning the area. Fear slowly crept in as the thought of a palukan being near entered your mind.

BANG!

Jerking at the sound your eyes shot up to a blood curdling scream. You felt a ringing through your head as you watched blood drip down from your friends leg. Panic took over as you called out to her but it was too late as another sound rang through the forest. You watched as she fell off the branch body landing on the ground. Ears ringing, you scrambled towards her in a panic.

“Zey! Get up Zey!” Your body seemed to moving on its own as you ran to the girl. She did not respond but you did not dare think of the reality of the situation as you dragged her body into the bushes. Pressing onto the chest wound, salty tears pored down your face.

“It hurts y/n..” The words came out of the girls mouth in a gurgle as blood rose into her throat.

“I fix it! I’ll fix it!” Quickly you rummaged through your pouch as you pulled out your healing supplies. You wrapped her leg rapidly as you stuffed leafs into her chest wound. Horror consumed you as you looked up seeing the leafs soaked through and blood leaking from under her onto the first ground.

“No no no no”

“y/n”

Your eyes flicked up as you met the girls weak ones.

“Tell Tseo I see him?” If you had not been only inches away the words spouted from her mouth would have not been heard. Her words quite and weak.

“I will not! You will, I will not let you die here!”

Voice cracking you pressed down onto the girls wound hoping that somehow that would stop it from coming out her back. Movement rash and desperate you used all the materials you could trying to stop the wound from bleeding.

Eventually you no longer felt or heard ragged breath breach the girls lips, but you did not care. Continuing to try bring the girl back denying the facts laid out in front of you. Eclipse engulfed the forest and for the first time you looked up at the lifeless face of your dear friend. 

The world slowed down as you looked at her dull eyes. Her Bioluminescence did not glow, her chest did not fill with air, her mouth did not move as her voice would never be heard again. Numbness, that’s all you felt as you stared at the girl. Your heart was tearing mind screaming, eyes burning but you could not move. Hand intertwined with hers but it was cold as you grasped it.

‘I could not save her’ The only thought that filled your mind as you starred at your dear friend. It was drowning you as you struggled to breathe, you felt as if the world was collapsing on you as you were sucked into a void of darkness. You could hear nothing, feel nothing or see anything but Zeys cold body.

Eventually warriors found you but you could not move. It was almost as if there was two corpses being dragged back to highcamp the only difference being one had tears flowing down their face.

You were embraced by your father, and all the Sully kids as you arrived but you felt no comfort. Tears ran down your face as you slowly took in your surrounding for the first time in hours. Harshly you pushed the group away from you as dread, sadness, anger, and guilt seemed to drown you.

You ran, you did not know to where but you did not care. You ran from the pity eyes, you ran from the guilt, you ran from the sadness, you ran from the horror. You can not run forever though because things always catch up to you. As soon as you stopped it did exactly that. Slamming your body down on the mossy rock you felt grief consume you.

You cried a cry more intense than any before. You felt it in your soul as sobs escaped your throat and your body shook with each one. When a presence entered the area you did not care to look too consumed in your own sadness.

Your cry’s did not calm until you were flipped over and slammed into a hard chest. The warmth surrounded you as rough hands held you. Neteyam, you knew it was him and sobs soon turned into hiccups.

“I-I couldn’t save her.” voice horse you chocked out the sentence. Neteyam only shushed you as he looked at you with loving eyes as his body hovered over yours.

“It is not your fault, it’s the sky people’s.” Brushing curls behind your ears the boy stared into drained sea green eyes that almost seemed as lifeless as the na’vi brought in with her.

“I will kill every last one that causes you sorrow.” Neteyams face hardened as he uttered the sentence. You felt a chill run down your spine as you stared at the boy.

“I want them all gone Tey.” Voice cracking into a silent cry you held the boy close, hoping that somehow his embrace would make everything go away.

—————————

You quickly learned that there is no time to mourn in the time of war. You felt as if the world was crashing down but you were forced to complete your duties. You get no breaks when gathers come in one after another to be healed. The sky people were making their first advances marking the territory they claimed as theirs with a border of na’vi blood. Tearing down the forest to build their horrid buildings and gas machines.

With this hostile expansion the clan took action successfully carrying out the first raid. You were filled with worry as Neteyam and your father took off that morning. It was hard to heal when all you could think about was them ending up like Zey, and you not being able to save them. No matter how much Kiri comforted you during the day every time you saw a bullet wound the memories came crashing back. You could not stand standing on the side lines, you wanted revenge, to protect the people you love, and to never feel as helpless as you in that moment.

That’s how you ended up standing outside of the warriors tent. They had just gotten back from the raid and were discussing what the next action plan was while you waited outside. The moment you saw Jake and your father you were quick to call out to them.

“I want to train to be a warrior!” Your voice pierce the air around you as both men wiped their heads to you. Neteyam soon emerged from the crowd of warriors as well shooting you a shocked look.

“Warrior? ‘Evi don’t say such nonsense, you will not be completing a warriors Iknimaya.”

Your father stood tall as his eyes were stern but you did not waver. Jake only watched the exchange knowing it was not his place to butt in.

“I watched my friend die just seven days ago!” Your voice came out broken and loud as you swallowed your sorrows. “I was useless! I could not heal her I could not avenge her if that sky person saw me I was at his mercy!”

“I have seen people die too you do not get to become a warrior just because you wish!”

“I could have died father ! Zey did die because we did not know the stealth that is trained into warriors! I need those skills I refuse to watch any of you die knowing I could have been there to protect you!” Your vocal cords strained as you yelled louder than you thought was capable. Tears broke your waterline as you stared at your father with a fire swirling in your tear stained face.

Antu looked at his little girl and for the first time he saw a na’vi woman. The fire of her mother dancing in her eyes as she was consumed by passion and anger. Antu’s words seemed to be caught in his throat as he soaked in your feature. The innocent that once danced in your eyes was gone as if you had aged years in only days. He felt almost as if the Metkayina he fell for all those years ago was staring right at him with her headstrong look. Eywa you shared your mothers fury.

“Fine, do as you wish, but in the name of Eywa I forbid you from going out onto that battle field until I deam you fit!” It almost came out in a hiss as your father tail slashed behind him. Mixed feeling consuming the man.

Pride entered your body as you continued to stare up at your father. In your mind you must become a warrior it wasn’t a want. In order to protect the people you love to protect your father.

“Thank you father” Scowling your father headed back to your pod only giving you a grunt in return.

“Well, I guess neteyam will be teaching you the ways of a warrior” Beaming Jake walked over and patted you on the back making you step forward to keep your balance. A chuckle rose from the man’s throat as he observed you.

“You have a lot cut out for you son.” Heat rose to your cheeks at this comment as Neteyam only nodded sending you a slight smirk.

“I can train y/n when we aren’t on raids.” Neteyam gruff voice stated as he looked at his father for approval. Jake gave a hum in response as he bid his fair well.

“Was Tseo in the raid?” Looking up you noticed the laters face slight scrunch as he looked at you with distaste. You had not gotten a chance to see Tseo in the past week.

“Yes, why are you asking about another man?” Rolling your eyes at his comment you shoved the na’vi away as you made your way to the group of raid warriors. Some of them looked proud while other looks discouraged by the sight they had seen yet none of them wore the face you were looking for. You pushed through crowds of na’vi as you searched and eventually you found your target sitting at the edge of highcamp staring out into the sky.

“Tseo…” Your voice was soft as you approached knowing that your pain was nothing compared to his. Gently lowering your limbs next to him you patiently waited for a response.

“Hey, y/n” Tseo felt his throat throb as he spoke puffy eyes meeting sea green ones. His ears dropped so far down almost as if it was impossible to bring them up even as he looked at his dear friend.

“So, you were there when she died?” Tseo spoke softly in a hoarse voice and the memories of the day came flooding back.

“Til the very end.” A still silence took over the atmosphere as your sorrows mixed. It felt as if a rainy cloud had been casted over the two of you.

“She wanted me to give you this, and to tell you that “I see you” they were her last words…”

Tseo did not say anything as he took the bracelet. You watched as the man you had always seen happy and full of light curl into himself in sorrow as he clutch the bracelet. Tears welled up in your eyes as the only thing you could do was wrap a thin arm around him in hope it would bring some comfort.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save her.” Guilt filled you as your chocked out the words, tears rolling down your face. Tseo said nothing as he sobbed and all you could do was sit there with him looking at the sky while praying to Eywa, hoping that somehow things would improve.

——————————

Eywa seemed to ignore you prayers as things around you only got worse. Battles and raids more frequent filling you with a dread every-time your love ones took off into the battle field. You knew you had many months left of training but the need to be out there with them only seemed to deepen each time a injured warrior was brung to your tent. At the three month mark you could not longer take the waiting reaching out to Tseo for extra help.

You knew this would affect how much free time you had but you did not care, the only thing on your mind being passing your Iknimaya so you could protect your people. Tseo was more than happy to help, sharing and understanding the fury you held towards the sky people.

“ Your back is arched again.” Slightly annoyed the warrior fixed your posture as his hands guided your body. A huff left your lips as you glance at Tseo who was now next to you. Eyes studying him you tried to mirror the stance he displayed as you straightened your back once more. A sharp inhale was taken as you drew your bow back letting go with a snap. A sharp sound flew threw the forest as the arrow flew at a rapid speed narrowly missing the target.

“Eywa, even Zey was better.” A bitter laugh left your mouth at his comment. Zey use to be a horrible with the bow you would often hear stories of her ‘lessons’ knowing it was Tseo reason to get close to her. You would be lying if you said you did not miss the girl, you were constantly reminded of her missing presence through out the day. Tseo felt the same, it was as if your little morning and night training sessions were use as a way to mourn and remises about the girl.

The silence between the two of you was not uncomfortable almost as if you spoke to each other with your eyes. The pain, bittersweetness, and sadness reflecting in each others. You heard the animals of the forest begin to wake as eclipse neared it end. Facing the sky you choked back tears re collecting yourself. You heard Tseos movements towards you feeling his body get closer.

“We do this for her, train for her, avenge her. Avenge all the fallen na’vi.”

Sucking a broken breath in you adjusted your stance. With a hardened gaze you drew your bow back, inhaling, then letting it go. A familiar woosh met your ears as your arrow flew, hitting the edge of the target with a ‘thud’. Eyes widening you felt pride soak into you as you turned to Tseo.

A breathy laugh escaped Tseos lips as he embraced you as you did little hops. Although your displays of happiness and excitement has dulled it had not completely disappeared as you occasionally shared moments like these. Picking up your feet you allowed your friend to pick you off your feet and swing you around. It had been the first target you hit in 4 days!

“Neteyam will be pleased in your lesson today.” Tseos tail swayed in a teasing way as he eyed you. Only giving as eye roll in response you slightly pushed the boy.

“Does not matter, what matters is I will fight along side you sooner.” A slight smile braced your lips as Tseos face mirrored yours.

Conversation cut short both your heads whipped to an approaching figure. Soon coming into view the morning light reflected off Neteyams shinning skin, wet from traveling through the forest damp with morning dew. His expression seemed to perk up when his eyes met yours, quickly falling as he eyes met Tseo. He knew you were friends but it slightly irked him how much morning and nights he found the two of you together.

“Y/n, Tseo” Despite his internal feelings Neteyam respectfully greeted both of you. Tseo was quick to greet him back as you simply waved to the boy.

“Father has battle plans he wants to go over with the warriors for tonight.” Giving a nod in confirmation Tseo gathered his stuff. Giving a little wave the na’vi was soon consumed by the lush green of the forest making his way back to highcamp. You felt sad seeing your friend leave but slightly excited for your day with Neteyam.

“You’ve been up quite early these past few weeks.” Neteyam commented as he low-key pried for answers.

“Yes, just spending time with Tseo.” Responding nonchalantly you looked at the na’vis expression that did not seem to change. You could tell he wanted to pry but had too much pride to ask directly. Wanting to keep your morning training a secret you did not indulge the 18 year old wanting to surprise him.

Neteyam only let out a grunt as he began to walk into the forest. Stifling a laugh at his childish behavior you followed him into the forest. Soon the two of you were running through the trees as you ran to wherever neteyam wishes for you to train that day. Every morning it was a similar routine, you would start off slow but in a couple minutes be running through the trees, traveling as if you were mice, quite and fast. You seemed to improve everyday rivaling Neteyams speed as you leaps from branch to branch. Despite your thick tail you were fairly good at staying quiet and moving fast, balance coming naturally to you.

“Damn, at this rate you’ll be the fasted na’vi in the clan!” The joking comment left Neteyams lips as he looked at you. You felt your heart skip a beat as he flashed a smile your way, hair whipping behind him as he ran. The sight did not last very long as he was quick to jump down expanding his body so the leaves would break his fall. A laugh escaped your lips as you followed the boy landing next to the already standing na’vi.

“So what are we doing today?”

“Hmm, how about we get a little sweaty.”

“You word things so weird!” Hiding your flustered state you playfully hit Neteyam. You only got a laugh in return as neteyam looked at your purple ears.

“Only three more months til you’re out there with me, want to sharpen your combat skills, bow and hunting can come another day.”

“I think I can body any sky person in hand to hand, even without training” A slight scoff left your lips as you looked at Neteyam with slight attitude. Instead of retaliating he only gave you a knowing look, as your sass was soon replaced by confusion.

“They have started sending avatars onto the battlefield.” As the words left his lips you felt your stomach turn in slight fear. The thought of them stealing your peoples DNA to make copies was slight unsettling. Being in a body that was not there’s, the thought made you sick. Sensing your unease Neteyam placed a rough hand on your shoulder, giving any comfort he could. Feeling slightly defeated by this new information you looked up at the taller with sad eyes.

“Let’s just get started”

~~~~~

Worry’s from your early conversation seemed to vanish as your training progressed. You had refreshed all the basics so by noon you and Neteyam were sparing. You knew the boy was holding back, the thought made you frustrated, did he not thing you were strong enough? How were you suppose to improve if he was always treating you as if you would break?!

Fed up, you cranked up your game. Using your trail to trip the warrior you quickly placed yourself on his torso, placing the prop knife to his throat the moment you made contact. A smirk played at Neteyams lips as you wore a triumphant look.

“You’re dead” Removing the wooden ‘knife’ from his throat you starred down at Neteyam, placing your hands on his chest to steady yourself. Although he was going easy you felt a bit accomplished, you did not think your plan would be so easy, or work as you had imagined.

“Hah, should I go harder on you?” The words left his lips in a playful manner. You felt hands travel to your thighs lightly grasping them as he starred at you with a cocky expression painted across his face. Bringing his torso up you slid onto his lap, as his grip slightly tightened.

“Neteyam-” The words seemed stuck in your throat as you took in your proximity. Feeling slightly overwhelmed by this position your body seemed to be set ablaze as a foreign feeling filled you. Hands places on your legs as his face was only an inches away, seeming to get closer by the secant.

“Can I?” Neteyam needed to elaborate no more as you lightly nodded your head not being able to speak. You felt yourself holding your breath as he neared anticipating the moment your lips would touch. It felt as if time had slowed as your eyes flutter shut, but the contact never came.

“Oh my Eywa!” A screeching voice made your eyes shoot open as you and Neteyam quickly made space. Shooting up to your feet Neteyam quickly followed as you both whipped your bodies around to the voice.

“Did I interrupt?”

Of course it was Lo’ak. He stood awkwardly as his eyes jumped between you two but you only felt annoyance as you stared at the boy. Neteyam had never kissed you, and of course Lo’ak would show up to ruin the moment. Unlike you Neteyam wore a mix of annoyed and embarrassed as he starred at his brother. Awkwardly clearing his throat neteyam shuffled next to you gathering his words.

“What are you doing here Lo’ak!” The tone came out slightly annoyed as he questions his brother.

“Dad needs you back for the raid, don’t give me attitude i’m not the one cock blocking!”

“We were doing nothing to ‘cockblock’!” Walking over to the older na’vi you lightly hit the back of Lo’aks head. Lo’ak gave a petty hiss in response as he lightly glared at you.

“Miss the old timid y/n.” Rolling your eyes you shot the boy an annoyed look as he mirrored your sassiness.

“Stop bickering like kids let’s get back.” Putting himself between you and Lo’ak Neteyam pushed both of you forward. He got relations of childish complains from both parties but quickly shut you up as he grasped your hand sending you a firm look.

You did not like sending them off into raids especially the ones in the evenings, so you made sure to take your sweet time heading to high camp. The night raids had more effect but always left more wounded. No matter how much time you took your actions alone could not prevent the ones you love from leaving that night. All you could do was wait for their return with healing supplies prepared for the wounded that would definitely be arriving.

You felt fear consumed your souls as you watched the warriors prepare to leave. You hugged your father soaking in his embrace, afraid it would be the last time you would ever feel his warmth. Afraid it would be your last goodbye to neteyam or last handshake with Lo’ak. Afraid your friend Tseo would end up like his beloved. The fears did not leave you, just like any other raid, you sat waiting for your loved ones too return. You did not feel joy as you looked up at the sky only dread as you awaited for their return praying that they still drew breath.

———————————

@ultimatebluff

[thefreaksrunthisshow]

Saw your request for NPMD prompts, so here's a concept that's been nagging at me. Post-Max, Pete (to Steph who has complicated feeling about her late father) "You say that shooting me makes you no better than your father, but..."

Fucking Pizza

Peter Spankoffski x Stephanie Lauter

A/N: Thank you so much for sending me this request! It’s short and the title is a bit weird but trust me just read it and it makes sense lol. But anyway I had so much fun writing this and I hope you enjoy it and that I did it justice! 😊

Warnings: language, bit of angst but mostly fluff, AU where Pete and Steph get tf out of Hatchetfield

“Steph,” Peter started, his voice unsure and high-pitched. He didn’t know how to approach the subject or even what to say but he had to say something. Stephanie was more distant lately than usual and he couldn’t really blame her. They’d lost two friends, his brother, and her father as well. They were doing the best they could with their fucked up lives seemingly falling apart at the seams. The only good thing that had come out of all of it was the comfort they had found in each other. He was hoping to put it all behind them and move on together.

“I don’t want to hear it, Pete! Can’t we just forget about it!” Stephanie huffed. “Just eat your fucking pizza, goddamn it!” she slurred through a mouthful of her own fucking pizza, pepperoni to be exact. Pete had to eat that horrid abomination — pineapple pizza and she refused to try it. It was sacrilegious to the pizza gods to even think about adding fruit to their holy concoction.

He sighed and chewed his fucking pizza. It was tasteless and bland, a cheap one from the convenience store down the road, but it fulfilled the job of filling their stomachs and providing a cheap date night which was something they rarely got to do. Between all the shit they’d been through with undead Max, the Lords in Black, and all the other weird things going on in Hatchetfield they got as far away as they could as soon as they graduated high school.

Pete was enrolled in a good university studying to be… something. He still had no idea who he was or what he wanted out of life, but he was slowly figuring it out. And Stephanie? She never was one for school but she’d found something she could do and that was art. She focused all her feelings, attention, and time on creating. It’d been her outlet to process all they’d been through and she’d managed to sell a few pieces so far. Between the occasional artwork sold and Pete’s part-time job at the university library, they made it work. Things were hard, but at least they had each other.

“You can talk to me about it, Steph. Please, I’m here for you.” He moved closer to her on the tiny second hand couch and grasped her hand, catching a whiff of stale cat piss and cigarettes. They’d found the couch on the side of the road and even though it had been cleaned to the best of their ability it still slightly smelled no matter how much they scrubbed it. It was tacky, red and green plaid with yellow swirls, but much like everything else they owned it was functional, at least for the time being. Finding a new couch was at the top of his to do list and he’d sneakily been checking thrift stores trying to find one for some time now to surprise Stephanie with. So far he’d had no luck.

“You’ll never understand,” she sighed. “For god's sake, I pulled the trigger! If not for that undead bastard you would be dead! I shot you and that’s exactly what those sneaky Lords in Black wanted! They played us and… and I’m just like my father!” she cried, her facade finally breaking, tears flowing down her cheeks.

“You say that shooting me makes you no better than your father, but… it actually makes you better,” he said finally.

“What on earth could that possibly mean, Pete? How does shooting you make me better than him? It surely seems like something he would do.”

He knew his next words were of the utmost importance but how could he say what he truly meant when the thoughts wouldn’t form coherent sentences? They tumbled in his now empty brain, bouncing around like a game of pin-ball. At last the ball fell through the gap but with it came the clarity to communicate what he needed.

“Your father… He did everything for power, to further himself, right? What did you have to gain from shooting me? Did you do it for power? No, you and the rest of the world would get to go on and yet you would have gone every day full of regret. Why live with that same regret when I’m alive and sitting here beside you?”

“That’s not — ”

“No,” he interrupted. “I’m being fucking serious. Why put yourself through that when I lived? Steph, I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

“Pete, please stop.”

“No, I…I love you,” Pete confessed. It was the first time he’d actually said those words out loud to her. Before now, he’d been too scared, too worried that she wouldn’t say it back but at this very moment he didn’t care about that anymore and he meant every syllable of those three words with every fiber of his being. “You need to know that, okay? I fucking love you and I hate to see you put yourself through all this torture when we both lived! We got out of there all that is in the past now!”

Stephanie sighed and collapsed into his arms. “You ass,” she sniffled. “I love you too, you know.”

“I know,” he replied, kissing the top of her head. “Now let’s finish our fucking pizza or it’s gonna get cold.”

[lameravigliadoro]

I'm a English native and I'm learning French I can have a short conversation in French but I'm really slow and takes time to understand some words. I used to be in French classes in highschool (I'm going to be a senior in highschool when it starts up) what would you recommend for me to use to help learn more? I'm currently using droplets and Duolingo for studying (Droplets for vocabulary and Duolingo for grammar, reading things like that) what would you recommend for me to use thats free or doesn't cost that much? It would help a lot thank you

Hi!

Duolingo and Droplets are good resources for starters.

there are several things you can do if you want to go further.

Check out RFI (Radio France International) : You'll find free listening and reading resources abt French speaking news. I highly recommend you listen and then read the podcast episodes of LES MOTS D'ACTUALITÉ (words that are the news - they will explain the origin and meanings of 1 word that is relevant these days in France). but be curious and check out the rest, they have lots of good stuff.

Read news articles for free on official news website France Info, RTBF (Belgium). you'll find some free articles on Le Monde, Libération, Le Parisien, etc.

find lessons and exercises on Francaisfacile.com to get a better understanding of grammar, conjugations, tenses, etc.

Read 19th Guy de Maupassanant's (King of French fantastique genre) short stories on Wikisource. Highly recommend "La Main" ("The Hand", kinda horror, but really famous)

-> when you're more confident abt reading novels in French, just search for any 19th writer + Wikisource and you should be able to find their works in full for free. My favs are Zola, Balzac, Victor Hugo (Les Misérables' writer !), Flaubert, Dumas (Les Trois Mousquetaires' writer !), George Sand, Stendhal (esp La Chartreuse de Parme) etc.

if you have doubts about how to say something like a native, ask someone on HiNative you'll always have some French speaking ppl to help you.

- Familiarise yourself with spoken French with youtube/podcasts/etc (anything that's material for listening skills). If you're on youtube you can check channels like

Vogue France and their street style, with subtitles and lots of fashion and slang vocab! I used it in my French lesson and it worked quite well.

Yes Vous Aime was a comedy skits channel, with French subtitles. They did parodies, you can check it out!

Paul Taylor is a British stand up comedian. He's doing skits and specials in both French and English, and he's honestly perfect at grasping and vulgarising French oddities either in the language or the french society.

Clément Viktorovitch and his weekly analysis on French politics/news on Franceinfo. As you may already know, we're very passionate about our political life in France. so you can get used to the vocab have a gist of it with these chroniques radio.

Karambolage - it's a bilingual channel (German & French - l'amitié franco-allemande is a big thing! 🙂) that explains social, cultural differences between the two countries. You can find illustrated explanations of Le Verlan, expressions like "Monter à Paris" etc etc. It worked so well with my students! they found it easier to understand.

Damon Dominique is a language American youtuber and he's good at explaining and vulgarising French grammar and slang. Sometimes you gotta look at a foreign point of view :)

Konbini (especially their Club Lecture, Vidéo Club where famous authors/film directors show their favourite works, their inspirations and talk abt it, you probably won't find any subtitles tho)

and ofc you have dozen of french youtubers like Squeezie, Seb, Lena Situation, Aurélien Prévaux, Zen (talkshow) etc.

And when you're more confident, you can pick a day when you'll try to think only in French, another day when you'll translate what's written on your food package/friends convos/emails etc etc

put your phone settings in french, follow vocab accounts on Instagram, follow French ppl on social media so that you get accustomed to read in French on a daily basis.

and find a book to read in french, or fanfics if you're into it, anything that'll make you read in French :)

I hope that answers your questions! and sorry if it looks like too much, I'm getting back at a language I used to learn in high school too, it's not easy and it takes time. so take your time with French, I just put everything I thought might help in the first months/first year!

good luck! bonne chance !

[silvfyre-writings]

Don't go without me (BSD Fanfic)

I bring you some more bramran hehe, I hope you all enjoy <3

Ranpo likes hugs.

In fact, Ranpo likes physical affection of any kind, however hugs tend to be his go to whenever the chance arises to receive some affection, Bram has noticed. Like right now, in the office of the Agency, Ranpo is seated on the couch, pressed up against Dazai who doesn’t seem all that bothered for someone that usually rejects all kinds of physical affection and is instead running his hands through Ranpo’s hair, the two quietly chatting about something that he can’t decipher. No one else in the office seems bothered either by the fact that the two genius detectives aren’t doing any work, but then again, since the near end of the world with a certain rat of a man, work for them has been slow.

Not that Bram works of course.

No, he just sits around the office and does nothing.

And that’s fine by him.

It allows him to study those of the Agency with careful eyes, to see what kind of people they are that he chose to align himself with—even weeks after the incident he still runs over the passionate speech that Ranpo used to convince him to their side. A speech that resonated within Bram’s own heart that was simply tired of being used for other people’s gain. So in a way it had been unnecessary with the conflict that’d been within his own heart, yet Bram welcomed it all the same. It showed him that Ranpo would do anything to make sure that those closest to him were safe, and upon agreeing to the younger’s terms, that included Bram as well.

Unfamiliar and strange yet… nice.

And now Bram’s been thrown into a mundane life where no one expects anything of him and he can live peacefully—so long as he doesn’t start turning the people of Yokohama into vampires just for the sake of it. Not that he has any intention of doing so because he’d much rather spend his days listening to the music that Aya insists upon him and getting some much needed rest. Which is what he’s in the process of doing; observing the Agency members as they move about is just his way of drifting off to sleep.

He watches the doctor enter the room and head straight towards Ranpo and Dazai, demanding that they sit still while she checks their still healing wounds. Bram can hear a little grumbling come from the geniuses, but they do as she asks, so Bram turns his attention elsewhere. He’s still learning the names of those at the Agency, mostly because he’s still figuring out the language for the most part and sometimes he struggles to decipher name from word—he’s getting better at it though, so Aya has told him in her efforts to teach him.

Now his attention is on the young ones of the Agency; the boy and the girl that are still children but were forced into growing up far too soon. The two are playing some sort of game that Bram doesn’t recognise, overseen by the tiger boy and the redhead, but they all have smiles on their faces which tells him that they’re having fun.

“Whatcha looking at?” Bram turns his gaze upwards, to see Ranpo leaning against the arm of the couch with his elbows. There’s a fresh bandage on the hand that’d been impaled that Ranpo’s not to subtly trying to pry loose with one of his fingers.

Bram reaches up to grab that hand with one of his own, holding it carefully in his grasp. “Just observing the young ones.”

Ranpo shifts his gaze towards the group, a look of understanding on his face. “Ah, yes. Fukuzawa-san found a bunch of games from when I was young and thought they might like them.”

“They are being children; such is a privilege in today’s society.” Bram says, letting his eyes slip shut.

“Well aren’t you being dramatic today.” Bram feels fingers dance across his forehead. “Everything alright?”

Maybe it’d be worth turning Ranpo into a vampire just so he couldn’t stand there and deduce Bram’s feelings like they were an open book.

But then again, if he does that, it means he’ll lose that caring bluntness that he loves so much.

He’ll settle for pretending he didn’t hear Ranpo instead.

Which of course, never works.

“Hey, don’t ignore me!” Ranpo whines, dropping down to nuzzle into the side of Bram’s neck, his arms crossing over Bram’s chest.

Bram grunts and cracks open an eye as he glances down at Ranpo. “I could not if I tried.”

“Good, then tell me what you’re thinking about already.”

“Why?” Bram asks.

A slender finger jabs him in the cheek none too gently and Bram fights the urge to bite the offending appendage off, instead raising a hand to swat at the annoyance instead. “Because I’m such a loving and caring partner that wants to know why you look so down today.”

“You are just being nosy.”

“Yeah, I am.” Ranpo admits without any hesitation. “So you might as well just tell me.”

Bram sighs and tips his head back, both eyes open to look into Ranpo’s own that stare down at him, the easy smile on the detective’s face more than enough to relax him. “I am just tired.”

“Tired?” Ranpo repeats, cocking his head to the side.

He nods. “Tired. That is all.”

“Well then I say we rectify that with a nap!” And before Bram can even protest, he’s being shoved upright so that Ranpo can squeeze onto the couch behind him, all of the shorter’s limbs enveloping him in a hug that really shouldn’t be as comfortable as it is. Bram feels a bit like he’s in his coffin, only instead of hard walls and a single pillow, he’s surrounded in warmth and all the pillows he could ever need.

It makes him feel alive.

He turns over to bury his face into Ranpo’s stomach, mumbling under his breath. “Do not leave.”

“I won’t.” Ranpo runs a hand through Bram’s hair. “A case may come through, but I’ll wake you if that happens.”

“Mmkay.” Bram murmurs, and closes his eyes.

And then opens them seconds later as quiet footsteps approach the couch.

Kunikida stands before them, a folder in hand and apologetic look on his face as he addressed Ranpo. “Minoura-san called with a case. Urgent, he doesn’t want to waste time in trying to find the killer. He said he’ll buy as many sweets as you want if you’ll help.”

Bram can hear the pout in Ranpo’s voice without having to even see it. “I’m with Bram.”

“I know, but it’s urgent, Ranpo-san.”

Ranpo lets out another grumble that prompts Bram to raise his head. “It will be fine. I will be here when you get back.”

Another grumble, but this time, Ranpo extricates himself from underneath Bram, making his displeasure known as he snatches the folder out of Kunikida’s hands. “Minoura owes me big time for this.”

Bram watches as Ranpo walks off, gut churning with an emotion he can’t decipher, one that he can’t remember having ever felt before. Whatever it is, it left him watching Ranpo, wishing for him to come back even though logically, Ranpo had to work. It wasn’t the first time that their time together had been interrupted, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last, but this time it was different and Bram couldn’t figure out why that was. Nothing had changed between them since Ranpo’s last case—in fact, the only thing different was that they hadn’t spent much time together because that last case had taken Ranpo away from Yokohama and—

Wait.

Was he missing Ranpo?

Was that it?

Bram blinks and sits up, curiosity on his face as he studies the doorway that Ranpo had walked through just moments ago. It makes sense for him to miss Ranpo if he doesn’t get to spend a lot of time with the younger man, but why is it making an appearance now? Why not every other time? Is it because they’ve grown closer? Done more things together? Bram doesn’t understand it, but he does understand the feeling now; it’s just been some years since he last felt that way towards another person so he didn’t immediately recognise it.

But that feeling sends him upright, moving before he even realises as he strides down the hall to follow after Ranpo at a pace that would be considered a jog if he were shorter.

It doesn’t take long for him to catch up to Ranpo, and it only takes a few seconds for his love to hear him coming and turn around. Kunikida does as well, but Bram ignores him and throws himself at Ranpo, nearly sending the both of them crashing to the ground as he draws Ranpo into his arms into a tight hug.

“What is it?” Ranpo asks, seemingly shocked but getting right to the point.

Bram remains silent for a moment, letting the hug go on before he pulls back and stares intensely at Ranpo. “I want to come with you.”

Ranpo blinks up at him.

“I miss you.” Bram elaborates. “To rectify it, I wish to accompany you on this case.”

For a moment, Bram thinks that he’s done something wrong when Ranpo continues to stare at him, but that fear eases when Ranpo smiles widely at him, reaching out to grab one of Bram’s hands and entwine their fingers.

“Fine with me! You can buy me sweets!”

Bram rolls his eyes. “Ranpo, I have no money.”

“Just use Kunikida-kun’s card, he has plenty of money.”

“Please don’t.”

[growing-cosmos]

Kim SeonHo for ELLE MEN Singapore Issue 05 2023 - Full Interview

Kim Seon Ho Keeps Going On

Farisia Thang

The beloved South Korean actor is back and taking things one day at a time — starting with his debut as a villain.

Every movie needs a good villain — but that's a role that not just anyone can pull it off. Especially when the cards are not stacked in your favour. Kim Seon Ho knows this well.

Having always played heroic roles (Hong Du Sik, literally the neighbourhood hero in Hometown Cha Cha Cha or charming second leads who win over the audience's affection, Han Ji Pyeong in Start-Up and Jung Jae Yoon in 100 Days My Prince), there was a certain image that became expected of the South Korean actor. Before taking on the Nobleman in The Childe, it would have been irreconcilable to picture him as a villain, much less an antagonist. Not because there was any doubt in his acting skills, but because it never would have occurred to the masses to cast a man who has been given the endearing nickname "good boy" to play a Machiavellian assassin. Even the director of The Childe Park Hoon Jung didn't see the fit when he first looked at the actor's profile as he thought, "This face is not for noir."

But Kim has always been one to rise to the challenge. Let us not forget that before he was a TV actor, he was a familiar face in the theatre industry. And though it was only at 31-years-old that he debuted in his first TV drama, his so-called big break came three years later with shows like Start-Up and Hometown Cha Cha Cha. This is the way things go: Just when you think he has reached the height of his career, he keeps proving otherwise.

And that is exactly what he's done in The Childe.

Even if it wasn't a comeback role from his two-year hiatus, it still stands as an impressive film debut on its own. This marks Kim's first big screen role and for that reason alone, the Nobleman remains one of his favourite characters. "All of the characters I've played are special to me and I cherish them all, but a memorable character would be my most recent role in The Childe as Nobleman since it was my film debut," says Kim. "I still vividly remember the excitement and nerves I felt seeing my character on the big screen for the first time."

As it is with most of his roles, he runs through a routine. "I usually take a fairly long time to understand one character. I would choose about three or four lines that I like from a script, and then repeat them over and over again in my head. This could be when I'm walking, when I'm in the shower, or when I'm eating." Kim adds, "Sometimes I also make use of music. would put on some good music, put myself in front of a stunning view, and then read out the lines. And as I do that, there would be moments where I realise, 'This is it. This is how this character would say it. From that point onwards, everything else falls into place itself. For this method to work and in order to get closer to a character, studying the script in detail has to come first. It's important to have a good grasp of a character's language and habits.

With the Nobleman, details maketh man. He says, "I developed my character by studying the lead character from A Clockwork Orange, and I spent plenty of time trying to understand my character as Nobleman." Just like he had done many times before, Kim learned new skills to better embody his character. "I got to learn about using handguns for acting for the first time. I did some practice at a shooting range in Myeongdong and I was given a dummy too, so I was able to practice and have a feel of it. That helped me a lot during the actual filming."

To simply call the Nobleman a villain would reduce the character to a flat trope, but Kim's performance and interpretation of him are actually for more nuanced. This is a character who gets imitated by his shoes being dirtied with blood after killing a room full of people, curses with a sadistic smile in an American accent and British accent, chases after the hero while hollering — and yet manages to confuse the audience with whose side he is actually on. Ultimately, Kim's portrayal of the Nobleman brings to life a brutal yet whimsical anti-hero.

And yet, the actor still struggles to pinpoint a moment during The Childe's filming process that he felt proud of himself for. In past interviews, he scrutinised his performance for the movie. Even now, he laughs as he says, "To be honest, it's hard for me to point out areas that I did well in. In my eyes, I mostly see only my shortcomings. Thankfully enough, people who went to see the movie had lots of positive feedback. I was glad and thankful to be praised as a fluid actor."

Fluid is the perfect word here, and yet it still feels like an understatement to the actor's performance. If his previous roles solidified his expected trajectory as an actor, then this character turned it all around - reminding us all that Kim has been honing his craft for over a decade now. He has been finessing this duality for almost 14 years, and while others may rest on their laurels and rely on their experience in the industry to get by, Kim is always looking for ways to better himself.

His recent projects have been movies and because of that "I'm not as pressured having to film a large amount of scenes in a short time as compared to other mediums. The directors told me to take my time between lines, which showed me the art of slowing down." He goes on to say, "When I was younger, I was also taught to enjoy the pauses between each line. I did think that I was already doing so with my acting for dramas, but the mechanics of movies and dramas are still very much different. So I've recently been working on how I can savour those pauses even more." Looking back at the Kim Seon Ho who started acting 14 years ago, the 37-year-old feels envious of his past self. "I'm envious of the experience and how raw my acting was back then. I recently rewatched some of my previous work. In the past, if I were to rewatch something a year later, all I could think about was how inadequate my acting was before. But seeing it again after 10 years makes me realise that that kind of raw acting was something I could do only back then."

Now, what he is able to appreciate about his approach to acting is. that "I'm a lot more composed and poised. My acting was often carried away by emotions in the past, but I think that my acting now has become more rational. I feel that this kind of rationality is also what makes me grow. After all, Kim knows a thing or two about alchemising patience into gold. While he started acting in plays at the age of 23, it was only eight years later that he made his debut on the small screens. But he has never been one to measure his trajectory against his counterparts in the industry. Waiting has always been a welcomed ritual for the actor, and Kim knows it's to that good things take time.

It's like his Hometown Cha Cha Cha character Hong Du Sik said, "Life isn't so fair for all of us. Some spend their whole lives on unpaved roads, while some run at full speed only to reach the edge of a cliff." It's a line that hits close to home for Kim too. "Coincidentally enough, I happened to re-watch that scene just three days before this interview, I searched for the scene randomly one day because I suddenly got curious about the kind of expression and tone I shot that scene with. Through that scene, rather than discovering elements about myself, I focused more on how I could get closer to Chief Hong. But there were moments where I did feel that I was becoming a better version of myself, like when I was preparing for the drama, after wrapping up the filming, and when I met other great characters." He adds, "People say that each word you say and each action you do creates one's character and personality. I think I got to learn a lot through the lines of my past characters like Han Ji Pyeong and Chief Hong, and thanks to them, I am the person I am now."

During his two-year break from acting on-screen, he remained loyal to his earlier comforts — stage acting. While he stayed off social media and film projects, he went back to his roots and performed in the theatre with Touching the Void. In that period of time, "I found comfort in the fact that one has the ability to create a change if they could just think a little differently in times of trouble." He continues, "I felt grateful to be able to share a stage with other talented actors, and I had fun. Touching The Void was a project where I discovered that the results of something can be very different depending on my perspective on a particular situation and on the support I receive. Most of all, I was moved and comforted by the audience members who came to watch the play even though things were difficult due to the pandemic. I was honoured to be able to perform such a remarkable piece of work for the audience, and it inspired me to become an even better actor."

In life and in work, Kim believes himself to be a dreamer. "I am someone who thinks that we must dream big, and I'm happiest when I come close to the goals I've set. Rather than setting a realistic goal but still feeling unsatisfied even after accomplishing it, I find more joy when I set big goals and accomplish it to a certain extent. When he considers his dreams for the distant future, "My goal is for people to remember me as a skilled actor and to be an actor that people want to work with a second time." But for now, his ambitions are straightforward — "I want to try a role that feels real and warm, one that others can relate to."

When he looks back at his career, there is only one thing he can really say he's proud of over the years. "Instead of feeling proud of my own accomplishments, I feel a stronger sense of pride towards the people that have been there for me since the days before I became an actor. Seniors, juniors and directors who gave me advice so I could pass the audition for my first project, agency colleagues who worked tirelessly until I got my first lead role, and my fans who supported my career as an actor. These are people that I'm thankful for and proud of every moment." He continues, "I often have thoughts like, 'How was I able to meet such incredible people?', 'How did I get so lucky to receive such advice from my seniors at this timing?', 'How is it that all these great people. are rooting for me?' Thanks to these people, there have been so many moments in my career that have made me proud that I cannot single out a specific achievement."

His gratitude grounds him because if there's one thing Kim has leamed, it's to take nothing for granted. With the love he's received from fans and friends in the industry, he hopes to return it tenfold. "I hope to repay the love with my acting and to successfully wrap up current projects. By doing so, I think I would be able to welcome 2024 with a happy heart." What that looks like these days is a running list of plays, dramas, and films. And while he's busy with his ongoing projects, for now, "I will be focusing on the upcoming mystery drama Mangnaein. Although I don't know what the future has in store for me, I will work hard to live my best each day."

When he thinks about the actor he wants to be remembered for, he considers the weight of his answer. "Not too long ago, I felt that I was on a plateau so I reflected a lot on it and I'm getting back on my feet again now." He goes on to say, "I hope to be remembered as an actor who constantly improves. (Of course, for that to happen, a lot of effort is needed on my part.) And I hope people think of me as an actor who is always growing, and as an actor who has the potential for even more growth. I hope to refine my craft a little more."

Because at the end of the day, Kim Seon Ho knows when to walk away from comparison. He's never bothered to measure himself to others, and he has no plans to start now. Instead, he holds himself to his own standards. And the version of him today is content to take things as they come, to better himself with every passing day. After all, if there's one thing we know for certain, it's that whatever accomplishments he's made so far are only a step to greater things to come.

—

special thanks to seonhojoy & preferredalways

[iraprince]

sorry if this is a weird q but i know you learned spanish a few years back for/with your wife and i wanted to ask if you have any media recs that y'all especially enjoyed/found helpful for immersion while learning? i'm helping my wife study (they barely retained any spanish from childhood b/c assimilationist family, it's a whole thing, but a very dear family member who doesn't speak english is visiting the states next year) and we're trying to integrate practice into our lives more atm

i am very much still learning spanish! i immigrated 2 weeks before covid lockdown started here, so i didn't get the immersion experience i thought i was going to 😅 and i haven't watched a ton of tv in spanish. i do listen to a good amount of music in spanish, and i do think looking the lyrics up (+ look up the english translation at least once, but don't glue urself to it) helps a ton -- over time u definitely start noticing that not only do u start actually understanding the lyrics but also u just start getting way better at separating words out from each other even at higher speeds/different rhythms, which is one of the toughest things abt listening vs reading/speaking. i recommend hip hop + rap bc it's a Lot of words at a challenging pace but there's still an emphasis on enunciating clearly -- BUT, if u want a bit of a challenge, hit up my darling boy bad bunny. he does not enunciate as much as some other artists, so at first it's rly hard, or at least it felt that way when i first started listening to him and i had a much looser grasp on the language -- but once u start being able to separate out what he's saying it feels like an accomplishment and it's very exciting. also this is just a psyop to get everyone to listen to bad bunny

i keep a (fairly irregular) journal and something i've been doing recently is i'll still write my entries in english, but i'll skip lines on the paper, and then i go back in in a different pen color and translate my own entry into spanish using those blank lines. also, it may seem obvious but do use spanish around the house w ur wife whenever u can -- even if it might feel a little useless when u only know a few phrases ur still practicing pronunciation and stuff. (i used to kind of neglect using spanish at home bc i was like "man all i ever say is 'i love u' and 'ur cute' and 'are u hungry?' over and over, i'm not learning anything" but like, it doesn't matter! do it anyway! and then you'll get comfortable enough to start cramming in more phrases.)

[stalwart-spirit]

for the one word prompt list: "confusion" for soleil!

Okay, I thought the last one went out of control but this one REALLY did.

It's a long one, starting on confusion and spiralling from there. Not proofread, we die like men at almost 3am. Mature language, general bastardry and void stuff.

"I don't know how you slept through the night with what happened! Isn't House Delacroix not far from you?"

"It was only by morning when I saw all the guards posted up and down the street that I found out!"

--

The state of the room could only be described as utter chaos. Desk chair toppled, drawers pulled and contents scattered across the floor, it wouldn't be hard to believe if this was the result of a robbery.

But no, the culprit was there, haggard and exhausted. Nothing more than a noble man at his wits end.

Soleil grips his hair in his hands, normally so well kept and maintained, now a frazzled and near tangled mess. Through gritted teeth, he curses. Frustration based in raw, unfiltered confusion.

"Fuck! Who was last in here? The maids? No. They're forbidden from the study-"

It's cold, freezing, that pit of dread in his chest.

Normally there it laid, a filigree lockbox upon the desk. Once containing jewellery, probably some collection of honestly worthless gifts from some previous admirer he didn't bother remembering, now used to contain something that Soleil in his own eyes deemed of much more value.

Years of study, leveraging what good carrying his father's name as the only son to House Delacroix, to get what he needed. Worn tomes that at a glance would seem nothing more than textbooks well past their prime, written by some long dead and deluded scholar. A cluster of bewildering writing, honest to gods ramblings of a madman. To the young lord however, each was worth their weight in gold.

To be caught with such studies would be heresy. Thus, each would be committed to memory, put immediately to practise, before the tainted scriptures were burned on the pyre. All this, accumulating in a summoning from the void, the entity brought forth by the stench of blood-candles and swiftly contained in a crystaline vessel imbued with his own aether.

A vessel now missing.

No one else could enter here. A study passed down to him from his father, his to do as he pleased. Somewhere intended to work on the house's trades, though repurposed into his own refuge of void related studies. There were only two keys, his and-

It's a whirlwind. Door thrown fully open to its hinges to slam against the adjacent wall, hurried footsteps thumping on the buffed wooden floors.

Blind rage is what sends Soleil running to the parlour room.

--

"To think, the Lord of the house slain in the night and his son not in any better condition."

"Oh please, I really try and not think about it, it's just so ghastly!"

--

Muffled words through the rushing of blood in his ears.

"Should have kept you on a tight leash, knowing how much of an arrogant boy are."

Head hurts.

"To think my worry was placed in thinking you'd be off gallivanting and shirking off your duties to this house, spreading your seed in whatever peasant whore took interest in you that evening."

Nails digging into his palms.

"I'll be reporting this in the morning, I can at least show you a modicum of decency by letting you know. Far more than you've ever given me."

Something snaps.

It takes time until Soleil noticed the deafening sound was coming from him, voice tearing through his throat in an enraged scream as he lunged forward, going to grasp for the crystal only to send it toppling downward.

It's as if all light is sucked out of the room in an instant, removed of all warmth and life as both men are thrown to the other side of the parlor from a sudden force, the empty space previously between them now stood a figure; abnormal, oddly proportioned and tilted at an angle, draped in what appeared to be shifting fabric made from blackened, necrosed flesh. An eyeless face takes in its surroundings and finally lay on the two men gaining their bearings.

A hungry maw salivates.

One man stands, one hand rested against a toppled table, the other raised forward, palm bloody from deep gashes from his nails.

"Remember. I brought you here. I wasn't ready yet, but I am now. I can get you what you need."

Soleil's hand now gestures towards the petrified figure of his father, a man barely able to comprehend the sight before him.

"First with him, then more. I know how. If there's none to feed you, you are free to take some of my own aether."

The creature stays silent in contemplation, the passing seconds feeling like hours. Eternity. Until a voice of no discerning source breaks through, surprisingly warm, wrapping around the young lord like lush exotic silks.

"A veritable wellspring for me to drink from... For a lifetime."

--

"Look! There he is now!"

"My, what was it you were saying about him being no better off than his late father?"

"I'd imagine he afforded only the best chirurgeons to look after him!"

The young lord steps out into the snow covered streets, long hair blowing in the blustering wind. All things considered, it looked nothing more than him losing on a night's sleep.

Found unconscious, bleeding beside the body of his father. With the state of the study and parlour, it was assumed a theft gone wrong, nothing more.

In the passing days, he'd take up the mantle of Lord Delacroix, attending to assets left by the deceased, and not long after setting his sights to travel outside of the Holy See of Ishgard, to the adventuring lifestyle not befitting of a lord. Turbulent, necessitating violence at times.

A hunger for bloody battle, insatiable.

[plaidbooks]

For my bingo, language barrier with Hasim 👀❤️

(tagging @adarafaelbarba here)

You rushed to the hospital as soon as you got the call about Hasim being admitted. You were always afraid something like this would happen when you learned he was a detective. And the call broke your heart.

When you showed up, a nurse pointed you in the direction of his room, and you hurried through the white hallways. But you stopped short when you saw a man sitting in a chair outside the room. He glanced up at you, and he could only be Hasim's father.

Hasim only asked you out a few months ago, and you had yet to meet his parents, but there was no denying the similar facial features. You knew the man was blunt but kind--and that he only spoke Arabic.

Being with Hasim, you had started studying Arabic; just the basics to show that you were interested in his culture. But you didn't know enough to have a full conversation with his father, and you were worried that your pronunciation would be subpar at best.

"I'm here to see Hasim?" you said in broken Arabic.

His dad's eyes widened slightly in surprise before he smiled softly, obviously happy that you spoke his language. He replied, but he spoke so fast, you didn't really catch what he said.

"Um..." you started, grasping for words. "He's my...boyfriend?"

At least, that's what you thought you said.

But his father's eyes narrowed, and his small smile became a frown. He said something loud and angrily at you, but you couldn't understand. You were starting to panic, feeling everyone's eyes turn and lock to you.

Mercifully, the door to Hasim's room opened, and a homey woman peeked out. She said something to Hasim's father before turning to you.

"You must be Hasim's girlfriend," she said in perfect English.

You smiled, though you were still mortified. "And you must be his mother. I see where he gets his good looks from."

She laughed, glancing back into the room. "I know you said she was a charmer, but I do like her already."

"Let her in, mama--please," you heard Hasim's voice reply.

His mom gestured for you to come in, and you took a wide berth around his father. His mom closed the door behind you, letting you and Hasim have some privacy.

"How are you?" you asked as you hurried to his side. Besides laying in a hospital bed, he looked perfectly fine, smile and all.

"Better now that you're here--the bullet just grazed me."

You took his hand in yours, giving him a squeeze. "Just met your dad--I think I said something wrong, though."

He raised an eyebrow. "What did you say?"

You repeated your words to him, and Hasim tilted his head back and laughed.

"What?! Did I not say you were my boyfriend?" you asked, panicked.

It took him a moment to stop laughing before he finally said, "no, but you did call me your whore."