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ncssian · 3 years

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A Favor: Part Twenty-Three

Nessian Modern AU

Masterlist

a/n: so yeah this isn’t my best work bc i havent been feeling great lately but i hope you guys can stay patient with me until i get my shit together. we’re almost to the end🤞

***

Sitting crammed between Elain and Feyre on the gray couch in Lana’s office, Nesta has to cross her legs prettily and pretend she doesn’t want to peel out of her skin right there. She doesn’t know what she was thinking when she invited her sisters to one of her therapy sessions, but she’s assuming it would be considered rude to kick them out now.

“Who wants to speak first?” Lana’s bob swings as she looks at each of them. The office is ice cold today, and Feyre and Elain’s presence doesn’t help the chill in the air.

Nesta crosses her arms before she can be asked to speak. “No, thank you,” she says. She knows everyone probably expects better from her, but no way in hell is she going to be the first to open up in front of this crowd. “Feyre,” she turns to her youngest sister instead, “why don’t you say something?”

“Actually, why don’t you set the example, Nesta?” Lana gives her a look, making her cheeks redden with irritation.

“Fine,” Nesta grumbles. She clears her throat. “As you can see, I have made moves to reconnect with my sisters. I invited them here because I hoped that therapy would bring us closer and also make them more… tolerable.”

Elain coughs, “Bitch.”

Nesta smiles tightly. “Elain could especially use this, I think.”

Lana is already frowning. She never frowns this early into a session. “We’ll start with an easy question, then. What’s been on your mind lately, Nesta?”

Nesta purses her lips, pretending to think. “Nothing important. I’m looking at jobs for the summer. I think Azriel keeps sneaking money into my purse, and it’s starting to become more than a little condescending. I caught up with some friends from school, and I was polite enough to pay for lunch.” She mentions off to the side to Elain, “Lucien was there, too.”

“Why would I care?” Elain sneers. She spies Lana’s disapproving look and lowers her head demurely. “Sorry,” she murmurs.

“That’s alright,” Lana says. “Why don’t you go next?”

“Me?” Elain’s head snaps up, and Nesta holds in her snicker.

“Start by describing your relationship with Nesta. I heard you two used to be very close.” Lana uncaps her pen, preparing to write.

Elain flushes lightly and folds her hands. “That was when we were children. The only thing keeping us together was that we shared a home. When we stopped living in the same place, some of us had no problem leaving others in the dust.”

“You can use my name,” Nesta rolls her eyes, “I’m right here.”

From the corner of her vision, Feyre cringes.

“Are you saying you feel abandoned by Nesta?” Lana continues probing.

Elain’s answering silence tells more than enough. Therapy must actually be paying off, though, because Nesta only thinks about interrupting and defending herself for a second before shaking it off. Her mind focuses on the word abandonment instead.

Lana is focusing on the same thing, because she leans closer and says, “Being abandoned bothers you?”

“I never said that,” Elain says indignantly.

“It would bother most people.”

Nesta watches Elain sigh and blink her big doe eyes at Lana. She’s always been able to use those eyes on anybody for anything. “I just don’t understand why I’m the villain for expecting a little loyalty,” Elain says sweetly. “Especially when you take a look at this face.” She cups her round cheeks. “You know psychology. How could you abandon this face?”

Nesta’s jaw hangs open. “Are we still talking about me?” She remembers Cassian telling her the story behind Azriel ghosting Elain, and a pang of guilt and pity hits her. She still hasn’t talked with Elain about why Azriel left Velaris, and she knows she won’t be able to decide whether to spare Az or not until she does.

“So that’s my turn,” Elain finishes up. “Feyre can go next.”

Lana is writing something sharply on her notepad, but she nods coolly. “Feyre, how would you describe your relationship with your sisters?”

“Oh, we don’t have time for all of that,” Feyre laughs awkwardly and waves a hand.

Nesta agrees, but the look Lana gives Feyre tells her that yes, they do have time.

Gulping, Feyre glances around. “Well, I was born last, so I guess that made me the outsider of the family. I never had much in common with my sisters, but now that we’re older I… hoped that we would grow past that.”

Translation: she hoped that once she found her happy ending in Rhysand’s arms, poor little Nesta and Elain would happily assimilate into her new community of wealthy friends, putting the cherry on top of her perfect life. And while Elain did that exact thing, it’s always bothered Feyre that Nesta won’t do the same.

Feyre continues, “I admit I’m not the best at understanding Nesta. Elain and I get along fine now, but Nesta…” Feyre meets her eyes. “It’s like nothing we do is enough for her, but for some reason I can’t stop trying.”

“Whose fault is that?” Nesta mutters.

“You want her approval,” Lana hums, taking notes.

“Is that what it is?” Feyre looks away.

Nesta refrains from saying yes, that’s exactly what it is, and it’s not my problem if you keep looking for something I can’t give.

“What are your feelings about that, Nesta?” Lana turns her focus to her. “Remember that this is a safe space.”

It really isn’t, not with two siblings holding long term grudges against Nesta. But once and for all, she’s going to set the record straight. “I spent most of my life being a bad sister.” Nesta’s voice is apathetic, straightforward. “I let Feyre take the burden of providing for us even though I was the oldest, and I didn’t know how to be anything other than cruel to my family. So once I had the means to do so, I cut everyone off for all of our sakes. I still don’t regret it, because being a stranger is better than being a bad sister.”

In that way, Nesta is a bit like her mother. Nesta was angry after her death, but she knows she would have been even angrier if Magdalene Archeron had lived and continued to be a disappointing parent. In that way, both of them are wise for leaving their families when they did.

“Or you could just be a good sister,” Elain interrupts with a drawl.

Nesta smirks bitterly at her. “I’d rather die.”

Feyre takes in a breath. “Why? Why are you like that with us?” She blinks furiously, and Nesta can see the simmer of her emotions. “It was okay when we thought you hated everybody, but you don’t. You only hate me and Elain.”

Nesta looks to Lana for help, but her therapist is sitting this one out. She sighs through her nose. “I don’t hate you,” she says, even though they might never understand. The next line comes with great difficulty. “I’ve loved you since before I even knew what love was. But I don’t like you very much, Feyre, and you don’t like me, either. Please stop trying to change that.”

When she finally meets Feyre’s eyes, though, they’re glimmering with tears. “How can I stop trying to change that?” Feyre whispers. “How can I give up on us like that?”

For Nesta to give Feyre and Elain the relationship they want from her would require nothing but lies on her part. And as much as she wishes she was capable of lying about this, she can’t do it.

Looking away and down at her hands, Nesta mutters, “It’s not fun for me either, but it’s how I am. I can’t be easy or friendly with you. I hate watching you try to make me be easy or friendly.”

Nobody says anything to that, but when Nesta looks up again Lana gives her a remote nod that Feyre and Elain don’t catch. Thank you for your vulnerability, it says.

“You said something interesting, Nesta,” Lana breaks the silence. “Did you see your sisters as your responsibility to raise?”

Nesta shrugs. “I was the oldest,” she repeats.

“Your father was the oldest.”

“He wouldn’t do shit even if you held a gun to his head, so I was up next.” Though Nesta hadn’t done shit either. Neither had Elain, but the rules have always been different for her. Elain redeems herself to others by handing out sunny smiles and pretending to have the intelligence of a fawn.

Lana stares at Nesta until Nesta’s skin starts to heat. “What?” she says defensively.

Ignoring the other two women in the room, Lana leans forward. “You told me once early into our relationship that part of the reason you left Tennessee was to get away from your sisters. You said you were heartbroken when they ended up following you here.”

Nesta doesn’t breathe or look to see her sisters’ reactions.

“Now I’m going to ask: did you really want to get away from your sisters, or did you want to escape the feeling of failing them?”

Nesta doesn’t know how to answer, because to her they might as well be the same thing. Having Feyre and Elain around is like having a weight tied to her chest. The lingering guilt every time Feyre is in a room, her existence screaming I’m the reason you’re still alive. Elain’s constant expectations of unconditional support and loyalty, whether it’s reciprocated or not. It’s all so heavy. And it all goes back to the fact that the three of them were once just helpless children.

If she couldn’t take care of her sisters, how is she supposed to take care of any child, ever?

Nesta releases a weary sigh. “You’re going to bring this up the next time we have the baby talk, aren’t you?”

Lana’s eyes sparkle. “Don’t get ahead of yourself just yet.” But Nesta can see from where she sits that her therapist’s notepad is covered in bullet points.

***

“I need to use the bathroom.” Feyre is hopping back and forth on her feet once the session is over. “You guys head down to the parking lot without me.” She exits in a rush, leaving the two sisters alone. Nesta hisses in frustration, nearly chasing after Feyre so she won’t have to face the inevitable awkward conversation with Elain.

By the end of the session, it was Elain that broke and pleaded with Nesta, “Don’t do everything we want, then. Just keep doing better, the way you’ve already been doing. I’ll be happy with just that.”

Nesta was surprised that Elain had even noticed her efforts, but she retorted, “And how do you plan to do better?”

To which Elain twirled her hair and murmured something halfheartedly about, “I might be more open to taking criticism or whatever.”

Though it was the absolute bare minimum, it was still a relief for Nesta to hear Elain admit that she has flaws worth criticizing.

Now, Nesta clutches the straps of her purse and turns for the stairwell leading to the parking lot. Elain follows without comment.

Inside the stairwell, Nesta asks, “Have you spoken to Azriel since he left Velaris?”

Elain looks surprised at the sudden question, and doesn’t remember to be guarded when she answers, “No. Why?”

Nesta shrugs, her heels thumping loudly on the linoleum stairs. “Because I know what happened between you two. I know why he left.”

Elain halts midstep, grabbing Nesta’s arm and turning to face her with wide eyes. “What do you mean, you know? He told you?”

“He told Cassian, and Cassian told me.” Nesta hardly cares that she’s being a poor friend to Azriel by spilling all this to Elain, and continues, “If I had known he was such a coward, I would have kicked him out of our place a long time ago… but I figured I would get your input on it first.”

She’s never seen Elain look so genuinely pleading before. “Get my input on what?” Elain breathes. “What did he say about me? Was it something I did?”

At that torn face that borders on heartbroken, Nesta decides that she’ll do more than kick Azriel out of the cabin. She’ll kick him off the whole mountain.

She shoves Elain’s back to get Elain detached from her and moving down the stairs again, and as they walk, Nesta spills everything she knows. She tells Elain about Rhysand’s talent of shoving his nose into places it doesn’t belong, and how one conversation with him managed to convince Azriel to ditch Elain for good. She tells her about how instead of having a straightforward conversation with Elain, Azriel chose to leave the city and hide out in the mountains like a pussy. She might sound blunt, but Elain needs blunt. She needs to know the unfiltered truth of things.

By the time they reach the floor where their cars are parked, Elain is silent. “Did he really say that?” she finally asks quietly. “He said he wants me to hate him?”

“That’s what I heard.” After a moment, Nesta feels the need to add, “You should hate him, though. He fucked up bad.”

When Elain continues strolling for their cars without replying, concern bites at Nesta. “You are mad at him, right? And mad at Rhysand? You’re not going to forgive them, right?”

“I’m not a total pushover,” Elain snaps. She stares at the cement ground as they walk. “I’m just… more disappointed than anything else. He gave up so easily.” She chuckles without humor. “It sounds like he was looking for an excuse to get away from me.”

Nesta frowns. “I don’t think he would’ve spent so long moping around our house if he wanted to leave you.” Though they can never truly know what Azriel was thinking or feeling until he grows a pair and talks to Elain. Still, she shudders at having to defend him.

“I take it he doesn’t mope anymore?” Elain says.

Nesta doesn’t know how to answer that truthfully. She knows there’s more to Azriel than he lets her and Cassian see, and she knows he’s gotten better at keeping his feelings to himself. So she says, “It looks like he’s doing better, but I really don’t know.” They reach Elain’s car.

“Were you in love with him?” Nesta suddenly asks. Or worse, is she still in love with him?

Elain digs around for her keys in her purse. “You know how I am. Of course I was.”

“Not anymore, though?”

Elain looks up, keys now in hand. “It’s hard to still feel love for someone I haven’t talked to in two months.”

Then it wasn’t real love. Nesta is relieved, even though it doesn’t change the fact that Elain is hurting either way.

Elain jabs her keys at Nesta and says sharply, “Don’t you dare punish him for what he did. That’s for me to decide on.”

Nesta’s brow creases in refusal. “I’ll do what I need to do, and you do you.” She’ll have to be careful with her plotting, though, considering Azriel is Cassian’s brother.

“No.” Elain surprises Nesta with the force in her tone. “He’s your roommate and your friend. Keep treating him like it.”

Elain makes it sound easier than it is, and Nesta wants to argue until she sees Feyre heading down the parking lot toward them. “Fine,” she grumbles halfheartedly.

Elain gives her one final long look, not of threat but something else. “Thank you—for inviting us today.” That’s all she says before getting in the driver’s seat of her little red car. At the same time, Feyre catches up to them.

“Where are you parked?” Feyre pants as she approaches Nesta. She sounds a bit out of breath, like she ran to get here before Nesta could drive off alone.

Nesta points down the lot to where her scrappy old car is waiting for her, and Feyre straightens up with a grim smile. “I’ll walk you.”

Nesta knows that arguing isn’t worth it, so she allows Feyre to trail her the rest of the way to her car. Once they reach the old thing, Nesta gives a curt goodbye and heads straight for the driver’s door. Before she can touch the handle, Feyre attacks her from behind with a hug.

“Get off me, freak!” Nesta tries to jostle her way out of Feyre’s arms. She tries being nice to her sisters one time and this is what she gets—

Feyre only squeezes her tighter. “You don’t have to hug back. Just let me love you my way.”

Nesta squirms for another second before stilling. Swallowing tightly, she stares at the reflection of herself and Feyre in the car door window. One of her hands goes to where Feyre’s hands are clasped around her stomach, and she stands there without moving. She can’t remember the last time she shared affection with a family member like this, but it must have been before their mother died.

The warmth at Nesta’s back doesn’t leave, like Feyre is trying to pour all her understanding into the hug. Silently saying, I’m finally starting to get it.

In a way, Nesta is starting to get it, too. After all, how do sisters with such a complicated history begin to forgive each other?

Not by apologizing, but by doing better in the future.

***

On her way home, Nesta remembers at the last minute to stop by Gwyn’s apartment to pick up one of her sweaters. She doesn’t know when Gwyn started raiding her closet like it was a free mall, but she has a school event next week and doesn’t plan on letting her nicest clothes rot at Gwyn’s forever.

Nesta enters using the key beneath the doormat, knowing Gwyn is at work and won’t mind her stopping by. She scans the living and dining areas for a glimpse of brown cashmere, but only finds scattered books and a disorganized mess. Her fingers twitch with the urge to stop and tidy up the place, but she continues hunting for the sweater. Gwyn promised it would be waiting in plain sight for her.

Realizing the scatter-brained girl probably forgot to put the sweater out for her, Nesta pauses in the hallway leading to Gwyn’s bedroom and bites her lip. She doesn’t know if bedrooms are off limits or not, considering how often Gwyn and Emerie have barged into hers, but she knows she doesn’t want to make a second trip here just for a sweater.

Without giving it further thought, she strides into Gwyn’s room—

And yelps to find Gwyn on the bed.

Except she isn’t alone, and there’s definitely another body under the dark green blanket with her, and whoever it is definitely has their head between her legs.

Nesta spins away at the same time she hears Gwyn’s cry of surprise. She braces one hand against the doorjamb and presses the other to her freezing cold face, not having any words for what she just saw.

“Nesta?” Gwyn calls from behind her. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“Um, have you seen my sweater? It’s the expensive one.” She’ll just grab it and leave. Or maybe she’ll just leave—yes, that sounds like a good idea.

“Nesta?” a new, deeper voice repeats.

Gwyn hisses, and Nesta freezes because she recognizes that voice. She wants to be wrong so badly, but she has to whirl back around to confirm for herself.

“Azriel?”

***

a/n: i decided to cut this chapter short and add an extra one to flesh out my silly little gwynriel subplot. so if there’s anything specific or random you wanna see happen in the next chapter tell me bc i might have space for prompts!!

tagging: @hellasblessed @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @valkyriewarriors @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @everything-that-i-love @cassianscool @swankii-art-teacher @wannawriteyouabook a favor: @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08 @courtofjurdan @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @wolfiixxx @cass-nes @seashade @royaltykxx @illyrianundercover @queenestarcheron @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @humanexile @that-golden-lyre @agentsofsheilds @mercy-is-alive @cassiansbigwingspan @laylaameer01 @verypaleninja @maastrash @bow-dawn @perseusannabeth @dead-on-the-inside666 @jlinez @hungryreadingaddict @anidealiveson @planet-faerie @shallowhighwaters @ghostlyrose2 @chosenfamily-valkyriequeens @rarephloxes @readiajin @nessiantrashh @live-the-fangirl-life @ifinallygavein @xoblivisci @sjmships @jungtaekwoonie-is-life @lysandra-tiara @lanyjoy-13 @frosted-crackers @post-it-notes33 @loosingdreams @fromthelibraryofemilyj @18moneytoad @dontgetsalmonella @champanheandluxxury @togreblog @arinbelle @ladygabrielli1997 @meridainthedisneyland @moodymelanist @pixieelea

#ncssianwrites #a favor #nesta archeron #nessian #cassian #nessian fic #nessian au

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mystic-deep · 3 years

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"Whipped Cream" - Part 1 | Nanami Kento fem!reader

♡ ♡ ♡ description: Taking cooking classes seemed like a nice way to relax and sharpen your skills, too bad the teacher hates you.

♡ ♡ ♡ warnings: none, some mild swearing near the end, rating will go up due to explicit content in later chapters.

♡ ♡ ♡ notes: Chef Nanami anyone? Probably the only job that he'd actually enjoy haha. I'm not sure how many parts this will have but I'm not going to rush it, I pretty much have the plot and ending all planned out, let's see how fast we can get there haha. As always, didn't have time to proofread so please don't mind the mistakes.

♡ ♡ ♡ word count: 2.5k

“Happy Birthday!”

Sitting at a table inside a small restaurant, you looked at your best friend as she handed you a colourful envelop. Money? She wasn’t your mother. A postcard? Too cheap considering she only bought you a bouquet of flowers.

“Open it already!”

Like obeying a command, you opened it and peeked inside. A gift card? How original. You spent days preparing the gift for her birthday and she gets you a gift card. Seeing your disappointed expression, she quickly explained.

“It’s a cooking course! You always said you wanted to attend one but never got the time, I figured if I bought it, then you’d have no choice but to go.”

You took the card out and began to inspect it. The words VIP were written in a golden colour as well as the name of the school you’d be attending.

“It was the most popular course, apparently you have to book it months in advance. I was really lucky since someone dropped out at the last minute.”

“When will I have the time to-”

“Shhhh!” She placed her index finger on your lips in order to shut you up. “The group session is thrice a week and you have twelve lessons in total. It’s after working hours and if for some reason you can’t attend then they can schedule a private lesson for the weekend. Benefit of a VIP and all.” She flipped her hair in a proud way and you fought back the urge to roll your eyes. Who says money can’t buy a very expensive and needless cooking course?

The truth was, you loved to cook, it was the only time you felt calm in your otherwise hectic life. You were also pretty good at it but self-taught. You once joked that it would be fun to take some lessons and actually sharpen your skills but that was the point, you were joking. You remember the promise you made to yourself at the beginning of the year that you would go to the gym every day and get in shape. You bought a class pass for a year with a personal trainer and only ended up going for a week or two. You still received reminders weekly that you should be attending since it was already paid.

“Thank you, it’s a really thoughtful gift.” You offered her a smile as you played with the card in your hand. Well, one lesson or two might not take up too much of your time. You were also curios to know why this particular course was so popular.

“You’re welcome! Also, from what I’ve heard but nothing confirmed yet, the chef that’s going to teach you is really good looking.” Her eyes gleamed and you wondered if she was sending you out like a scout, to test the water and if it was good then she’d join as well.

“Wonderful, I can’t wait to be surrounded by an army of housewives.”

Monday afternoon you found yourself at the reception of the cooking school you’d be attending for the next couple of weeks. You had to admit that so far the building looked impressive. There were several classes from what you could tell and the lobby was already pretty crowded.

“Can I help you?”

The pleasant looking receptionist gave you a smile and you handed her your VIP card.

“Yes, I’m here to attend the course with chef Nanami Kento.”

“Oh, Nanami-sensei!” She gleefully took your card and began the registration. “You’re pretty lucky, this is our most popular class. It’s quite unusual for someone to drop out.”

“So I keep hearing.”

She gave you back your card as well as a small bag that contained several items.

“You have here your apron as well as your class schedule and several cooking accessories that you get to keep at the end of the lessons. The class is 10-A, the very last room at the end of the corridor. I hope you enjoy this experience!”

You smiled and thanked her before heading to the classroom. Upon entering you realized that your fears had been justified, the whole room was filled with women ranging from mid-thirties to some ladies that looked in their sixties. Only women, and they all seemed to know each other.

You moved to one of the islands in the back, taking out your apron and putting it on. You had to admit you kind of felt like you were participating in the Great British Bake Off. In terms of gadgets at your disposal, everything was modern and your island was well equipped with everything one might need for the cooking process. You had your very own oven and stove as well as a Kitchen aid and several other utensils. In one of the drawers you found a cutting board as well as a set of knives and several bowls. You were starting to realize why the fee had been so expensive.

“First time here?”

You turned around and nodded sheepishly at a group of older looking women.

“I guess everyone knows each other huh?”

“For most of us this is the second time we’ve taken this course, it’s quite lovely, you learn a lot of things.” You couldn’t help but wonder why they would need to take the exact same course twice. Either they didn’t manage to learn what they were supposed to the first time around or the chef really was thathandsome.

“I’m looking forward to it as well, I want to sharpen my skill and this one came highly recommended.”

“Are you married?” The question came as a punch in the gut and they all looked at you like it was the most normal thing one could ask.

“We didn’t see a ring on your finger.”

“Urm no, married to my work perhaps.” You offered a light chuckle but no one else found it funny.

“Then for whom are you sharpening your skills for? Any children?”

At this point you thought their questions were quite intrusive and rude. Were they perhaps thinking that you were a threat? A young new girl that was going to steal away the attention of their sensei? You were actually starting to get aggravated by their attitude. What happened to solidarity between women?

“I want to sharpen them for myself. No children, just a cat, pretty lucky I suppose.” Their eyes narrowed and you smiled to yourself. Teasing them was proving to be quite fun.

“Oh? Well, you’ll want them when you’re older. Although, you should probably hurry, not much time left to spare.” By this point your hand was itching to slap at least one of them. What an unpleasant bunch of old hags!

You were ready to give a sharp reply when the door of the classroom was opened and your teacher stepped inside. You hated to admit it, you really hated it, but he was indeed handsome. Blonde hair, light coloured eyes, build like a brick wall, sharp features and when he opened his mouth to greet the class, you fawned over his deep voice.

“I’m glad to see some familiar faces…and new ones of course.” His eyes landed on you and you shifted, feeling like a doe caught in the headlights. His presence was quite something, no wonder these women were ready to turn into harpies just for a bit of his attention. Still, it wasn’t enough to win you over. If anything, you felt an instant antipathy towards him-he seemed too arrogant for your taste.

“We’ll start our first day with a test bake. I want to see each and everyone’s level before we begin our lessons.” As he spoke, he neatly rolled up the sleeves of his white shirt and put his own apron on. You could actually hear sighs going around the room but he seemed unbothered.

“You can bake anything you like, something you’re comfortable and good at.” With that said, he gave you an hour and a half to see what you’d come up with.

You decided on your famous lemon cookies, they were pretty easy to make and every time you baked a batch your friends would fight over it. As you were creaming the butter with the sugar you felt a presence near your station and turned to look at Nanami that was peeking inside the glass bowl.

“What are you making?” Just like that, no introduction, no small talk, right down to business.

“Lemon cookies. They’re-”

“Quite a simple recipe, don’t you think? I wanted to see your level, this is something even a child could bake.” Your heart dropped a little. You weren’t great at taking criticism and you couldn’t stand how those old hangs from before were snickering behind you.

“You said to bake something that we’re good at.”

“So lemon cookies are the only thing you’re good at? Hmm.” With that he left your station and you just stared at his back as he went on to check on someone else. Your cheeks turned red with embarrassment and anger. You were going to shut him up, once he had a taste of your cookies he’d eat his words, as well as the whole batch.

It seemed, however, that the universe was working against you. The batter didn’t have enough time to chill and since you weren’t accustomed to the oven you over-baked them. You stared at the plate of spread lemon cookies, not one looking the same as the other, and chew on your bottom lip.

With your baking time coming to an end, he was walking from one stand to another, mostly complimenting the results. The other women in your class were a giggling mess, thanking him like he had offered salvation just for eating one of their treats.

When he finally reached your station, you felt his judging eyes burning holes into your very soul.

“What happened?”

“Well, the fridge is not set to the right temperature. The one I have at home is much cooler, and I didn’t have time to let the batter set. Also, the oven is different from-”

“A simple recipe but you couldn’t finish it properly. Everyone in class uses the same type of fridge and oven, no one else had any problems.”

You wanted to argue back, wanted to say how unfair it was since they were all well accustomed to their working stations because they had already taken this class. Instead you kept quiet and fought back tears that had formed at the corner of your eyes. If you wanted someone to look down on your work you would have stayed overtime at your office.

“Can’t be helped, since you’re at beginner level. You have to keep up with the rest of the class so please pay extra attention during lessons and don’t hesitate to ask your classmates for advice.” With that said he continued to stroll around the room, throwing nice remarks left and right.

When the class was finally over you grabbed your bag and dashed out of the room. You struggled to take off your apron as you walked through the main reception and into the elevator that led to the parking lot. When you finally managed to set yourself free you fished the phone from your handbag and dialled your friend.

“Hey little chef, how was your first-”

“Horrible! I’m never coming here again!” You practically screamed in your phone as the elevator doors closed. You were shaking with anger and as you stared at your reflection in the mirror from the opposite wall, you also realized you looked just as upset as you felt.

“He’s an ass! He didn’t teach us shit! Test bake he said, so I made my lemon cookies you know.”

“Oh I love those!”

“Right?! Too easy he said, even a child could make them! The damn fridge wasn’t working properly and I forgot to set the oven so they spread a little but they were still good! Then he just made fun of me in front of the whole class and ugh don’t even get me started on them-” You continued to vent as the doors of the elevator opened and you stepped inside the underground parking lot.

“All of them have taken the class before and they’re just here to drool over the teacher. I swear it’s a fucking joke, his class is only popular because every single middle-aged married woman there wants to fuck him!” You stopped from your raging rant to look for your cars keys that were nowhere to be found. “I swear they all have some sick fantasies with him! He’s not a chef, he’s just some thirty something guy that preys on naïve women. He probably doesn’t even know how to whip cream!” You huffed in anger while trying to juggle the bag you received at the reception, your handbag and your phone.

“Where the hell are my car keys?”

“They seemed to have fallen at your feet.”

You froze, feeling the blood draining from your body. You turned around in slow motion and looked up at the figure of your teacher who was only a few feet away from you. You didn’t realize just how tall and menacing he looked until now.

“Urm, I-”

“I’ll be seeing you on Wednesday. That is, if you want to attend a class taught by a guy who doesn’t know how to whip cream.”

The sweet embrace of death couldn’t have come faster. You picked your keys from the ground and tried to form some kind of apology but he quickly walked through the parking lot towards his car. He opened the door of an expensive looking Mercedes and drove away, leaving you standing there like a complete moron.

“Y/n are you still there? What happened?”

“Oh god, oh god, I’ve fucked up!” You began to walk to your car feeling like the worst person on earth. “I’m not sure how much he heard but he heard plenty.”

“Ohoho this is getting interesting!”

“I’m glad you’re enjoying this.” You spat bitterly as you opened the door of your own car and stepped inside, throwing you bags on the empty seat. “Well, I shouldn’t bother with what he thinks anyway. He was mean to mean first and it’s not like I’m going again.”

“Oh no, you’re not getting out of this one! I didn’t spend so much money just so your workaholic ass can come up with excuses not to attend! I don’t care if he likes you or not, despite what you may think he was highly recommended for his skill not for his looks.” You grumbled as you turned on your engine, really hating the fact that your friend was making a point. You loved to cook, you were good at it, you might have had a bad day and now your teacher hated you, but you shouldn’t give up on the opportunity to learn proper cooking skills.

“Alright, I’m going to try a few more lessons. It will be a miracle if he doesn’t kill me by the end of the week.”

“That’s my girl!” You rolled your eyes and hanged up the phone before driving off. You really didn’t like Nanami and now he had more than enough reasons not to like you, but you also weren’t a quitter. If anything, you will continue to go to classes out of pure spite. You’ll show him how skilful you actually were, far better than any of those hyenas from your class. You’ll whip that cream until you’ll turn it into butter.

#jujutsu kaisen #nanami kento #kento nanami #nanami kento x reader

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2-cute-4-school · 4 years

Text

𝙉𝘾𝙏 𝘿𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 : 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙧 𝙪𝙨𝙪𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙘𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙝 𝙜𝙚𝙩𝙨 𝙨𝙤𝙛𝙩 𝙛𝙤𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢

@proseeuhn~aaah its okay if it takes a while! i honestly dont mind! my requests was… how would the dreamies react to their friend/crush who is usually unintentionally quite distant and intimidating being with soft with them and grabbing their hand out of nowhere to just play with it? if that makes sense?? like the friend/crush gets all soft and grabs the dreamies hand and plays with it djskks thank you in advance! ~ Thank you so much for your request (๑>◡<๑) , it was such a fun and original idea, i really enjoyed coming up with scenarios for this (requests are still open btw)

Mark Lee

so mark may be just a tiny huge bit scared of you sometimes

but that’s mostly because babie doesn’t want to make a fool of himself in front of you 🥺

cuz your rbf gives him THE chills sometimes

you’re the definition of a ‘bruh’ person but somehow that’s a huge charm in mark’s eyes he’s royally whipped been there done that

and the one(1) way mark can fully relax and be in his element is when he’s playing the guitar i’d die to see/hear him

and even after he’s done you’re just ✨ vibing ✨ together in silence

until you suddenly reach out and grasp his hand in yours and bring it close to your face

mark.exe has unexpectedly crashed (((( ;°Д°))))

“woah your fingertips are so calloused from playing”

mark needs a cooler PRONTO (⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾ Д ⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾)

he’s OVERHEATING FOR REAL and hyperaware of your warm breath fawning over his fingertips

and then you intertwine your hands and bring them into your lap as you brush your thumb against the exposed skin on his hand that you’re able to reach with a small smile on your lips (ﾟ ωﾟ//）

and mark is SHOOK with your casual display of affection and softness

he can’t help but stare at the soft curl of your lips, the light twinkle in your eyes, the fingers that grip his own so firmly yet so endearingly ♡‿♡

“you’re so beautiful” it just slips out

0.0 pause, delete existence, rewind major PANIC

but to his immense surprise a faded hue of red paints your cheeks and ears (๑•́‧̫•̀๑)

“thanks, you’ll get there too eventually “

（ノT＿T)ノ＾┻━┻ way to ruin a moment

but he does forgive you when he feels the index finger of your other hand trace a faint heart on the back of his hand (*>ω<*)

and mark would spend a lifetime playing his guitar if it meant he’d get to witness this unexpected but very welcomed side of you

Huang Renjun

renjun probably watches you like a hawk

your distant demeanor sometimes baffles him poor baby

but he likes you too much to give up so easily whipped man ٩(♡ε♡ )۶

and he does everything he can to *subtly* hint about his tiny huge crush but without making you uncomfortable renjun best boi we been knew

but you don’t seem to get the gist AT ALL (>皿<)

and renjun is getting more and more concerned on your lack of affection towards him

so babie gets lowkey sad (oꆤ︵ꆤo) not allowed in this household

until one blessed time you’re peeking over his shoulder as he inspects one of his unworldly amazing drawings

*GASP* “JUN THAT’S SO BEAUTIFUL”

you hurriedly take a seat beside him and grab one of his hands in yours as you gush over his artwork

“HOW EVEN, THIS IS JUST…JUST- I HAVE NO WORDS, MY JUN IS THE BEST ARTIST IN THIS filthy WORLD!!!11!!!1!” ლ(^o^ლ)

renjun’s brain and face is overheating

‘we…we’re holding ha-hands??!? and they called me best artist- wait ‘MY jun’??!?!!??!?!?’ （◎0◎）

and while he’s already shutting down, you decide enough isn’t enough and give him THE FINAL BLOW

you run your fingers gently over the back of his right hand and you suddenly lean your head on his shoulder as your soft voice registers in his overworked brain

“your birthmark is so pretty, renjun, so unique” (♥ω♥*)

*please bring cold water, towels, a fan, the entire fridge, renjun is burning alive he hot that’s why*

but renjun makes THE ULTIMATE POWER MOVE and brings your intertwined hands up to lay a *smooch* on your hand 🥺

get a room pls

Lee Jeno

the members once said they also found jeno intimidating and cold before getting to know him

so he’s certain that you only need to open up a lil

that’s why no matter how distant and icy you act towards him

he never NEVER gives up

just shoots you one of his ^‿^ smiles and carries on

and unconsciously, you start to soften up around him

and there a very specific moment when he started to realize that

you were helping him cut up some fruits and as he was about to grab another apple, you grabbed his hand, intently inspecting it

jeno having a heated internal debate : ‘chill man, don’t give them a reason to catch you off guard’ (ó﹏ò｡)

“well i gotta admit lee jeno”

“huh?” insert that cute confused sound he makes

“i’m really awestruck by you”

jeno puffing his chest internally : ‘well it’s damn time you noticed me senpai’ (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)و

“you’ve really got the ugliest tan i’ve ever seen”

‘ASDFKAWDKSAIKAKJW- *passes out* ‘ X.X

jeno just snatches his hand away and grumbles about fruits and bicycles

he’s sulky the entire day but not because you hurt his ego no

and as much as you love teasing jeno, your growing soft spot for him is acting up and your melted heart just *mush*

so you kick renjun off the couch in order to sit beside jeno renjun tries to protest but you shoot him *that look* and he retreats with his tail between his legs ミ●﹏☉ミ

jeno tries to keep up his deeply hurt act dramatic much

until he feels shy fingers brushing his as if hesitating, before they curl around his firmly

‘ASDFKAWDKSAIKAKJW- *passes out* ‘ x2 because the softness in his heart is just too much for him

later on it becomes a habit neither of you complains

Lee Donghyuck

it’s the 4th time in the past 2 hours

and yes, donghyuck has been keeping count for scientific purposes obv

nvm, it’s the 5th time your hand brushed against his

and hyuck is ✨ ABOUT TO LOSE HIS MARBLES ✨

the demons on his shoulders are arguing by now

‘this is an attempt to subtly hold your hand dumbass’ (－‸ლ)

‘no it’s not, they would never touch anyone, remember when they threatened to chop chop that guy’s balls for touching them?’

‘it’s not the same thing, you’d let the opportunity if holding your crush’s hand pass by like this?’

‘sure go ahead, and then watch y/n dip it in acid’ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

donghyuck shuddered at the thought

what he doesn’t know is that sure, while sticking a random guy’s hand up his ass for touching you is a ‘been there done that’ for you

hyuck isn’t just a random guy

you’d choke on an asparagus before admitting it, but he has grown on you

sure, he’s still an annoying brat sometimes

but he’s so much more than that, he understood you in ways other couldn’t, he was patient with you and did his best to comfort and show you he cares in his own way (｡♡ˇд ˇ♡｡）

and you grew to care for him too

maybe a bit more than a friend should ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“hey hyuck!! my hand is cold, warm it up for me”

you acted on impulse before you could chicken out and before hyuck could answer and slipped your hand in his

demon on left shoulder : ‘ha told ya pay up BEACH’

“you only love me for my warmth” said donghyuck totally not blushing and fangirling on the inside

“pffft i don’t love you, i like tolerate you and just shut up human radiator” said y/n totally not swinging their hands back and forward like kids in love

Na Jaemin

this man= W H I P P E D

y/n makes an edible omlet? jaemin : this is real taste, 5 star michelin right here!! stream gods menu cowards

y/n squishes hyuck like a bug for waking them up? jaemin : yes babe whoop go off cutie!!! (•̀o•́)ง

y/n breathes? jaemin : PERFECTION!!!11!!!1!!1!!

so you went from ‘(•ิ_•ิ)? what is this person saying??’

to ‘ (｡•́︿•̀｡)why isn’t he saying anything’ whenever he omits cheering you

but in a subtle way

you can’t have him catching on

so one day you’re sitting at the kitchen table and he’s feeding you pieces of fruit you whine about being able to feed yourself but nana knows you’re secretly enjoying it

when you suddenly snatch his other hand and one of renjun’s pencils left around and you 🥺 him

unfair if you ask him, how is he supposed to say no so he doesn’t

and you start doodling on his hand o(^◇^)o

he tries to peek at what you’re doing but you squeal softly and move to cover your drawing

“nana! wait until i’m done!!!’ (｀0´)

he *melts* at your cute reactions and resorts to watching your face expressions fondly as he occasionally prods your lips with fruit

“done!!!”

you move away to let him see the cute dolphin you drew on the back of his hand and he gushes about the cuteness of your drawing

but then you shyly start fiddling with his fingers as you explain

“you know how a dolphin helped poseidon find his love? this will make sure you’ll always find me” (๑•́‧̫•̀๑)

jaemin, softly smiling in understanding, curls his own fingers over yours and brings them up to his chest

“you don’t have to worry about that”

Zhong Chenle

chenle doesn’t seem a very affectionate person either

so he’s not really worried about your lack of affection social distancing

what he is worried about is that you’re also distant on an emotional level

because what if he misreads you?

what if you misunderstand him because of the lack of communication?

what if he isn’t there for you the one time you need him?

this baby just wants you to know he cares (◕⌓◕;)

but at the same time he doesn’t want to act in a different way around you read as doesn’t want to make a fool of himself in front of his crush

also you’re quite close

as friends for now (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

and as he does with all his close friends : he brings you to his home in china!!!!

and this boi has the surprise of his life when you obviously make an effort to open up to his family ໒( ͡ᵔ ▾ ͡ᵔ )७

you smile and chat a lot with his mom and chenle also gets to talk a lot with you since he has to translate so who’s the real winner here

and you know that variety show(?) where chenle dances with his grandpa in the park? you go there too (∗´꒳`)

and while you’re both waiting on the side…

you!!!!grab!!!!his!!!!HAND!!!! and pull him towards the dance floor!!

chenle : Σ(゜ロ゜;) then looks at you being all : o(^◇^) and chenle turns to : (●♡∀♡) whipped culture everyone

he barely even breathes until you settle for a comfortable dance pattern, one of your hands on his shoulder, one of his laying gingerly on your waist respectfully cuz he is a manners man

but most importantly : hands clasped together at the side!!!!!!

and these minutes in which you just dance together without a worry, chenle gets to live his long forgotten childhood dreams 🥺 you know how in cinderella it’s the dance that starts everything? yeah that

chenle marks this date in his calendar and makes it a national day

Park Jisung

lyin’ is a sin so we don’t do that in dis household

jisung is highly intimidated by you (⌣_⌣”)

as in he likes likes you but he doesn’t dare act on his feelings in any way

so renjun and haechan took it upon themselves to play cupid a horrible decision really

and it seems that their attempts at dr. love only ended up in disasters

locked you together in a rollercoaster together? jisung threw up on both your laps (✦థ ｪ థ)ﾉ

ice skating together? jisung stumbled into you, knocking you over so you left the ring with a bruised chin and sore knees and jisung : (シ_ _)シ

arcade hangout? your competitive self almost made jisung cry you not only ignored him but also kicked his ass in every. single. game

so no one had any expectations when they arranged a horror movie night and invited you to sit beside jisung ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

you were awfully quiet since the start of the movie which wasn’t necessarily unusual but ya know

but the atmosphere was getting tenser and tenser and you just knew some kind of jumpscare was coming

and survival comes first!!!! so you clutch onto the nearest thing

jisung’s hand ding dong correct!!!!

and you also bury your face in his shoulder subtly (っ⇀⑃↼)っ

you, shitting your pants : not a word to the others

jisung, also shitting his pants : not one

but uh even though jisung is awkward and everything, he isn’t complaining!!

he finds comfort in your death grip and you’re also his crush so DOUBLE WIN!!! !(•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑

ofc the others notice but they don’t say a word because ✨ you’re cute ✨ so they leave the teasing for later thought you escaped? not a chance beach

and to make it all even more embarrassingly cute, you fall asleep like that

and you wake up the next morning tucked in jisung’s side with a sore neck, clammy hands and 200 notifs on your phone with pictures of you and jisung sleeping from every possible angle (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)

and with a soon-to-be boyfriend too

643 notes · View notes

moeruhoshi · 4 years

Text

Bc of that prompt I saw 😚❤️ and I fr forgot when I saw it

Lucy shivered as she drew her arms into her lap, trying to warm her half frozen hands in between her thighs.

The AC in the classroom was busted, blowing cold air on everyone on an already brisk April morning. It happened to blow up in the middle of homeroom too, so no one was prepared for the sudden fifty-five degree weather.

The teacher steadily gave their lesson, struggling to speak through their physical chills. It was painful, but everyone pushed on, simply rather because they had to.

There were only two students impervious to the sudden onset chill, Natsu Dragneel and Gray Fullbuster.

They were polar opposites in a lot of ways, but the one that they were most alike was their reaction to the cold.

While Natsu didn’t exactly love it, it was that he could honestly never feel it. He was never too hot either, he could probably withstand the heat of a fire if he stood in it. Which he has more than once tried to do.

Gray was the one who thrived in the cold, as if he was a product of two icebergs. Juvia liked to think that he was secretly an ice fairy when they were younger, because of the way he seemed to cling to the cold air. He always managed to strip off his clothes in any scenario and somehow never noticed. His parents swore that they had no idea where he gained that quirk from.

The class stared at them jealously while they suffered in silence, hoping that their fingers would warm up if they wrote notes at a faster pace.

As the bell rang for a break between classes, almost all of the students ran out to get something warm from the vending machines.

Lucy stifled a sneeze and grumbled in her seat, Levy turning around to face her with an equally annoyed grimace.

"The tip of my nose is already frozen...I hate this," The blonde whined, cupping her hands together and breathing into her palms.

"I'm just glad Erza said she was going to get some cocoa...she'll be able to get to the front of the line first," Levy huffed, trying to bury herself deeper into her blazer.

"I wish I brought a jacket," Lucy groaned and let her head rest against her desk. "I don't want to get a cold..."

"Wanna borrow mine?" A voice suddenly spoke up from beside her. It was Natsu Dragneel, who rose from his desk in the back, pulling off his hoodie.

"Eh? You really mean it?" Lucy asked, her eyes gleaming up at him as he split a wide grin.

"Yeah! You know me, I'll be fine without it," He shrugged as she took hold of the overheated fabric.

"You're so sweet! Thank you!" She fawned before slipping it over her head, surprised at how much heat it still retained. "I'll give it back to you at the end of the day, yeah?"

"No problem!" Natsu said as he went back to his seat, sitting down as the classroom began to fill up at the sound of the first bell. Lucy failed to notice the ripe blush present on his cheeks, or the way Gray and Gajeel nudged him with knowing looks.

"No fair," Levy pouted as Lucy seemed to warm up in an instant, her hands relished briefly by the warm can Erza set down.

Lucy stuffed her hands into the pockets, burrowing slightly into the oversized material, her stomach fluttering at the scent of his cologne sticking to it. She suddenly wished she hadn’t promised to give it back later that day.

But when she did, solemly letting it go to the pink-haired boy that stood beside her desk, her heart seemed to flip at the sight of his smile.

“If you’re ever cold again, just let me know,” He chuckled, both of their lips quirking as they nervously let their fingers brush together. “

“Yeah,” She nodded, quickly picking up her bag to leave. Her friends stood by the door, the lot of them giggling as Lucy waved one last time before skipping down the hall.

“Would you hurry up already?” Gray huffed from the corner he and Gajeel stood in. “We’re not getting any younger over here, fire face,”

“Ah, hush,” He waved them off as he brought the fabric up to his nose. Strawberries and sunshine, it smelled just like her.

#nalu #nalu fanfic #nalu fanfiction #nalu fan fic #nalu fan fiction #natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #natsu and lucy #lucy and natsu #natsu x lucy #lucy x natsu #fluffy nalu #fairy tail #nalu fairy tail #fairy tail nalu

304 notes · View notes

xsugarysweetsx · 3 years

Text

𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 6

Warnings; Zeke is still a creep/yandere; language; a fight (terrible action written); argument; violence; blood mentions; some angst; and fluff

TW: violence towards reader; slight ch*king; biting; held against will.

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*knock knock*

“I’m coming! ugh so early“ Sasha called, it was only 5 am and she still had about an hour of sleep. Mochi started growling at the door and then scurried away “What’s gotten into him?“ opening the door Sasha comes face to face with a certain blonde she loathed.

“Sasha was it? Y/N told me so much about yo-“

“What do you want Zeke?“ she sneered back

“feisty“ he whispered to himself “Listen I know you probably hate me but I haven’t heard or seen Y/N, I’m worried“

“Well, she’s fine and you don’t need to worry about her. Especially you.“ she felt Mochi at her feet as if taking a protective stance for her. She picks him up “See? Even her cat doesn’t like you after that night. Look she’s out of town at the moment, it’s a family matter.“ she covered for you while she closed the door, but it’s stopped by his foot

“Hey,“ there it was, that creepy smile “Let me know when she gets back, or if you need anything“ luckily Mochi attempted a swing with his claws along with a hiss

“good boy“ Sasha whispered as she closed and locked the door. Well, it looks like she’s taking the fire escape to work today.

“so, did you get her?“ Zeke hears as he enters the passenger seat of the car waiting outside. He watches like a predator watches prey, as she walks to her bike and makes her way to work

“All in good time boys. We know where she lives, works and that she’s alone. It seems Y/N isn’t here either. Hm, unless...” he thought for a moment. His eyes widen and an almost psychotic chuckle escapes his lips

“...boss?”

“That bastard,” he said calming down a bit “he didn’t really think she’d be safe if she was there did he?” fixing himself up and placing his glasses back where they were, pushing his hair back.

“Boys, we’re making one more stop later tonight so be ready.” with a smile he asks them “How do you feel about being a decoy for some time huh?” he had a plan.

It had just popped in his head now, it was reckless, exciting but he was going to do it anyway. He was going to have you one way or another, even if he had to keep you locked up for the rest of your life. He was getting what he was after, one way or another. Don’t you worry little Y/N, I’ll find you soon enough

<><>

“Aren’t you going to get any sleep Levi?“ you ask as you lean on the doorway of his room.

There he sat in sweatpants and a white t-shirt, something he commonly didn’t wear. It was always dressed shirts and slacks for him, it was nice to see him relaxing for once. You’ve grown accustomed to them, they had made their way into your friend circle. Hanji was the funny yet smart one who can get you to smile one way or another. Erwin was the wiser one of the three and you’d go to him for advice when you needed it. He was also the one you’d show new stuff of ‘your generation‘ and he’d be fascinated by them.

As for Levi, that was another story. He made you feel safe and even despite knowing him for about a week now, you trusted him. You were almost always checking on him or him checking on you. Hanji and Erwin made it a habit to always tease you for having an “unspoken thing”.

You guys have even had your moments at the funniest of times. You both had gotten locked in the cramped closet looking for some supplies. He stood behind you with limited space, trying to keep space between you both that seemed impossible.

And Levi, good lord, he smelled so nice! Lavender and lemon just engulfed you but it was such a pleasant smell. And his warmth was something that made your stomach swirl and flip. Next thing you knew the closet opens just for him to land on top of you, your faces only inches away from each other. A blush dusting his pale skin as the silence was broken from Hanji

“oooh I’m sorry for interrupting“

“I don’t need sleep but it helps when I have headaches,” he said coming to you grabbing his towel

“Do you have one now?” You ask him

“You asking me more questions may give me one”

“Hey!” Levi may have been cold and reserved but he cracked a few jokes now and then “you are a funny man Levi”

“Is that so?” He asked raising a brow

“Levi, can I talk to you for a moment?” Erwin called out. Walk-in from his previous spot with you he goes into Erwin’s study. Here was where they kept photos, records, letters, and just about anything.

“What is it blondie?” He crossed his arms

“You smell like lavender and lemon” he pointed out

“I always do-”

“It’s sharp,“ he raised his eyebrow “maybe you should tell her” he offered

“Erwin, we’ve talked about this. I don’t....I don’t know“ Levi has had his share of love and relationships in the past but it was something he’d rather not talk of. Erwin and Hanji knew about how things ended and how much pain he had to endure. “Either way I-“

Stopping halfway Levi’s eyes widen. Turning his head he takes in a breath, he knew this scent too well. It made him sick to his stomach. It was Zeke, he was outside the house.

“What is it, Levi?” Erwin asked picking up on his change in demeanor and the scent filling the air. Walking over to the window he shuts the blinds. It was already nightfall which meant anyone could be out there. More specifically anyone who were the same as they were

“..secure the house, now!” he ran off dropping the towel in search of you. “Y/N?!” he called out running to your room door. You were standing by the window gazing down at something. Walking over to where you stood he sees a man standing with a blank expression. Gazing upwards with a smile he points towards you, as of taunting to come for you.

Levi yanks you away from the window and closed the blinds. Bringing you out into the hallway, everything had gone dark. Erwin and Hanji had come out with a few strange-looking weapons.

“Levi, what’s the plan?” Hanji asked

“You two, I’m trusting you to deal with those two outside while I get her somewhere safe” he speaks as he takes your hand and walks in the direction of his room. Hanji and Erwin taking off in the other

“Wait who are they?” You ask frantically. There could only be one thing in this situation but you prayed to any god that it wasn’t who you thought.

“I’m more than sure it’s Zeke. This scent is way too strong. He might have masked his goons with his scent to try and trick us” getting to his room he brings you inside and closes the door

"Can I help?" you ask. You didn't just want to stand around like some helpless girl. "Let me help"

"You won't be able to fight them off," he said grabbing a hand knife "as helpless as you might feel, this is a fight we can handle. You're going to stay here while I look around the house"

"But-" you grab on to his hand and stop him from leaving, your heart was pounding and your panic was at its peak. Levi turns and does something you don't expect he pulls you into a hug to calm you down

"I won't let him take you." he was so warm and comforting. Knowing Zeke may be here right now put you on edge. Levi took the role of your protector, whenever you didn't feel safe you kind of floated to him. You just wanted him to stay close but then again you may slow him down

" Levi I..." why did you call him? You know he'll be fine but something just wanted him to stay close "..be careful, okay?" he nods sharply and leaves you in his room. It felt cold. It was quiet and dark, nothing but the moonlight shining into the room, and the sound of your heartbeat in your ears. You settled in between the nightstand and his bed, the area feeling secure. It was so quiet, any little noise made your hairs stand on end.

Looking around you saw a small piece of paper on the floor it was a picture. Picking it up you were surprised to see Levi--and was he smiling?! But there was also a woman in the photo, she had warm brown eyes and short fawn hair. They seemed so happy together, who was she? Where is she either way if they’re together? Did something happen to her? Turning it over the date showed it was more than 30 years ago.

“So where is she-“

“She’s gone ya know“ a voice came from the darkness making you shoot up from your spot. He was here but where your eyes dart back and forth through the darkroom. Not a figure in sight, yet you could feel the chill of the room run up your spine, finally a figure emerges from the darkness. The way he almost blended in with the dark made you're very being shake.

“Might happen to you if you keep wanting him“ he sneered

“Stay away from me, “ you said backing up against the wall almost hoping for it to swallow you whole. He starts to walk towards you slowly

“Ah yes Petra, she was a lot like you. Very sweet, naive, beautiful, and yet“ he stops moving and says with a chuckle “He couldn’t even save the woman he loved. And now he’s about to lose another one“

Your voice gets caught in your throat as you feel something clutch your throat. Zeke was suddenly right in your face, his eyes held no life nor emotion as he stares into yours filled with fear. He moves his nose down to the column of your throat

“You know I’ve wanted to taste your blood from the moment I knew what you were“ you could feel two sharp teeth begin to prod into your skin, threatening to breakthrough. His hot breath and tongue making you feel disgusted and utterly doomed.

“LEVI!!“ you unexpectedly scream out for help praying for him to come and save you. Zeke chuckles again

“HA! You think that bastard’s coming for you-“ he was cut off by being thrown off of you and across the room, some furniture falling in the process. You had slumped down to the floor still in shock feeling your body just shut down in fear. Squatting down he looks you over

“Did he hurt you?” he asked taking your trembling hands in his. His thumb grazes over your neck where you wince a little as a drop of blood paints your skin. Now he was livid, you could see how his eyes glowed in the dark, almost dangerously. He stands up and faces Zeke who stands up drunk from the throw

“You son of a bitch“ Levi curses him running over to deliver a blow to his jaw only a chuckle leaving his throat.

“Awh is Levi upset I touched his little girlfriend?” one to his nose “come on, you learned from the last time, humans are too fragile for you. Yet you have a soft spot for them, don’t you” a knee to the stomach. Hit after hit he keeps talking which only seemed to anger him more.

“Looks like you have shit that comes out of two places huh?“ Levi scowls at him holding him by his collar

“Didn’t he tell you Y/N?“ Zeke suddenly lets out “his past lover was human, he had to save her by turning her and instead....killed her faster, nothing but a monster.“ he smiled. It was a smile that held only evil as Levi dropped him to the floor. His fists clenched so hard his knuckles were losing color, meanwhile Zeke made a quick run for the window and made his escape. Levi’s shoulders float up and down as he panted still seeming ready to fight.

Trying to comfort him you walk over and rest a hand on his shoulder “Levi don’t listen to him, I know you. You-”

“What would you know?!“ he cut you off “I just found you in the forest and patched you up. Now my only friends and I are in constant danger all because Zeke is out for you!“ his words stung like venom, they honestly hurt. You retract your hand back towards your chest. You didn’t know that how he felt, maybe it was the heat of the moment? For now, perhaps you should stay clear, and let him have his space. Fast footsteps approach the door and in comes someone you had never met.

“Levi! Erwin is hurt, Hanji’s is alright“ he said wiping sweat from his forehead. Without any words, he nods and follows him out. You simply sat on his bed and felt your eyes water. Why....you felt hurt but why? Sure you cared for him but you couldn’t have possibly caught feelings for him? But why does it hurt? Was it because he was still sensitive about his past? Or maybe it was what he said?

After a few minutes, you walk out of the room and to the infirmary. Erwin laid unconscious in a bed while the new man patched up Hanji. Meanwhile, she explained what happened on her end.

“One of those bastards tried to practically rip him limb from limb and Molbit showed up and gave us a hand, “ she said in a monotone. “Poor Erwin, he put up a fight...Oh Y/N, this is Molbit. He’s an old friend and confidant of mine“ Molbit looks at you and smiled, but even a warm smile couldn’t heal the guilt you felt. They had gone through all of this because of you, they wanted to protect you....and you did nothing.

“Hey um...where’s Levi?“ you asked a bit nervous

“He’s in the bathroom cleaning himself up, “ Hanji said pointing over her shoulder towards the bathroom. Your heart starts to pick up the pace as you walk to the door. Your pulse almost stops as you raise your first to the wooden door and knock twice

“It’s me Levi...“ your voice was a bit weak saying his name, yet there was silence “....I’m coming in“

There he was shirtless at the sink, in the sink were some medical supplies. He had some covered but the ones on his shoulder seemed to give him a problem. They weren’t too bad, just two cuts, a scrape and a bruise

“what is it?” He asks in a softer tone than before

“U-um...let me help you..” you said it as a statement, not a question. “Please. You guys sacrificed a lot for me....it’s the least I can do.”

He turns to look at you and sighs, walking over to the toilet top he takes a seat. Picking up some disinfectant and swabs you walk over to him hesitantly. Your hand rests on his shoulder as you start to clean up the scrapes and cuts. His skin was soft but his body was strong, you could feel how the muscle under his skin was well built. You were also trying to hide the fact you were as red as a tomato. Seeing Levi shirtless was a whole other level of fluster. Him as a person was amazing, and so were his morals, but in all honesty, he was built like a god.

“I’m sorry about earlier...“ he breaks the silence “I was pissed off and just.....I’m sorry“

“No Levi...I stepped over boundaries.“ you answer as you patch up his scratches“...maybe if I leave you guys can go back to being-“

“No.“ he abruptly stands from his seat “I...I was the one who found you and wanted to help. None of it is your fault, and if you leave how can I...“ you look into his silver eyes wanting him to continue. Instead, he took a hold of your hands, his eyes concentrated on yours. Your noses only inches from each other. Your face felt 100 degrees hotter and you were convinced he could hear your heart jumping from your chest.

“Levi..“ you say his name gently feeling your knees wobble from your nerves. You unintentionally close your eyes waiting for something to happen. You could feel his hot breath graze your lips as soft skin ever so gently pecks your upper lip. Did he just kiss you?! No, you were imagining things, he couldn’t have.

Opening your eyes you find him still there, blush running over his nose, cheeks, and ears.

“Levi I-“

“Goodnight.“ he says suddenly and leaves you in the bathroom flustered and a bit confused. Did he...did he feel a certain way about you? Your heart was racing but your stomach was fluttering with excitement. Your hand came up to gently cup your mouth, something about it just felt right. That’s when Hanji walked in.

“Y/N, what’s with--whoa are you okay there?”

“Y-yeah“ you answer mindlessly as you run out of the room after Levi. You couldn’t tell what you were listening to, your head or heart. Maybe they were saying the same thing. You had started slowing down when you had seen him at the door of his room. Coming to a stop in front of him you both just stand there

“...so uh..“ you start “you...kissed me and I-“

“Don’t feel the same? Yeah I know you don’t...listen it was just impulse“

“Levi..“

“After Zeke I doubt you even trust me anymore much less after what I did“

“Levi I liked it..“

“And you’re--what?“ he snaps out of his rant and looks at your face that held its composure

“I didn’t mind it...“ you say with a blush. Did you actually have feelings? Feelings for a vampire, one who saved your life three times already. “I can prove it too“

why did you just say that?

Without a second thought you reach your lips to his in a kiss. Just a few seconds longer than the one he gave you. His lips were so soft and had a slight lemon taste from his tea. Instead of pulling away or just standing there, his hands come to your waist and pull you in closer to him.

The proximity making your heart do flips. He was warm and strong yet so gentle with you, almost like you were glass. It made you flutter and tingle inside, your toes curled feeling his teeth slightly pull your bottom lip. Maybe it wasn’t in words or thoughts but you knew your feelings had grown attached to him.

You had fallen for a vampire named Levi Ackerman. He saved your life, defended your life. He always made your heart skip a beat when he was around or when he cared for you. How was it possible to have even fallen for him so quickly? You honestly didn’t have a clue, but did you want one? no, not at all

<><><><>

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pinencurls · 4 years

Text

“I could just hold you and listen to your voice all night long.”

Hiii so this is my entry to @stellarboystyles‘s three year anniversary fic challenge! I’ve been busy with getting ready for classes starting and balancing other stuff so I wrote it on and off for a week and a bit but I hope you all enjoy! Feedback is so so encouraged and appreciated <3

Here’s my masterlist of some other stuff I’ve written x

Enemies (more like friends but oops) to lovers, prompt 9 “I could just hold you and listen to your voice all night long.”

14k+ :) Not read through sorry! pls let me know of any mistakes and I’ll correct them <3 (also i k n o w the title's bad but i couldn’t think of anything, pls feel free to leave any recs.)

- - - -

It isn’t that I hate Harry. He just makes me feel...insecure. He’s never said or done anything directly but it’s hard to feel good about yourself when all your closest confidants seem to compare you to somebody else, somebody they so clearly hold higher above you. There wasn’t a single day I could meet a mutual friend of mine and Harry’s and not have them sing his praises, and apparently everyone was a mutual friend. I’ve known Julia and Theo for years, we all met in uni when they first started going out but it wasn’t until a year ago that I somehow ended up finding myself a regular within the friendship group they’d formed when they both went into the music and fashion industries. They had ties everywhere and after a pure coincidence of running into them and their circle at a pub, almost all my weekends were spent in various art galleries or new restaurants owned by somebody’s cousin or the guy they met last night at a Fleetwood Mac concert.

I’d met Harry about five months into hanging out with the group. He’d known them a lot longer than I had, weaving his way into the little pockets of interesting people for years since the x factor. I was busy with work the first few times he was in town but after a while, Nick, the persistent party planner of the group who always managed to wrangle us together, insisted that I just had to meet him. . . . . .

Eleanor’s house is huge and buzzing with hundreds of strangers. I cling to Julia and Theo’s side, Nick and Eleanor are nowhere in sight - most likely playing host or drinking too much chardonnay in another corner of the house. These four are the only people I can say I really know here, sure there are a few familiar faces on the dance floor, either from having met them at any of Eleanor's past elaborate parties or just because of they’re not so subtle fame. That’s another thing, all the people sipping wine and dancing around me are fairly...well known. Either just within the industry or to the general public too, they’d all gain fairly high status. It was a fluke really that I got on so well with Julia when we first met on a fashion course in uni.

Julia had big goals, all of which she was on track to fulfil, that conflicted slightly with mine. Her goals consisted of runway show models clad in designer brands she might one day contribute to whereas mine were more...anti, that whole world. It took a few years to find a steady footing but eventually, I was proud of where I’d ended up: a comfortable little cubby in the fashion and sustainability columns of a handful of independent magazines. After a few nights out with Julia, I was pleasantly surprised to find her shared interests and solidarity in my work and ambitions of her own within the same ideology. But whilst that’s all well and good, I’m still very much the small indie journalist that slips through the cracks when it comes to small talk at these kinds of events. It became apparent pretty quickly that my latest articles on how fast fashion had begun its destruction of a liveable environment in developing countries weren’t as relevant or interesting to the people promoting Prada and Calvin Klein as the next met gala theme.

“Do you want another drink?” Theo asks from beside me, pulling my focus from my scan of the room.

“No thanks..I’m good.” I murmur, debating how long I have to stay before I can slip out and feel a little less awkward around all the people I have no clue how to talk to. “Think I’m gonna head off actually..”

“Look I know you hate networking, but this is just a chill get-together yeah?” Theo chuckles, squeezing my shoulder before taking another sip from his gin and tonic. “We’re in the same boat about these snooty things but tonight’s not like that, relax a bit will ya.”

Theo works mostly with small-time music artists, producing debut albums and such so we share the same deep discomfort for the many events we often find ourselves at. It’s how we got close really, week after week we’d trail behind Julia as she strikes up conversations with Hollywood elite...and he always makes getting piss drunk in someone’s pool house exceptionally fun.

Before I can further any excuses about getting home to start on the legitimate and ever-growing pile of work deadlines on my desk, a tall man in far too much Gucci to belong anywhere but in a room full of models and artists makes a beeline straight from the bar to our awkward party.

“Harry!” Theo shouts, embracing the slightly tipsy man in a hug he reciprocates.

“It’s been too long mate, how ‘ave you been?” Harry cheers, leaning back from the hug and grinning down at his friend.

“I’ve been good - busy, enjoying the free bar as always.” Theo jokes, motioning between his and my matching G and T’s. Harry’s eyes wander up from the drink, realisation dawning on his face as he smiles again.

“Ah and you must be the famous Olivia,” He reaches his hand out to mine and shakes it lightly. “Sorry I didn’t introduce myself, ‘m Harry, it’s good to finally meet you, love.”

“Likewise.” I smile, trying to suppress the blush his words of endearment tease. I can’t deny the natural charm and charisma everyone always talks about now that it’s hitting me straight on. There’s something about the way he doesn’t hesitate to hold eye contact just that little bit longer that makes the room go still for just a second. He’d got it down to a T.

“Aww I see you two have finally met!” Nick interrupts. My hand falls from Harry’s grip as he’s welcomed into another hug. “About fucking time as well, been trying get this one to take a night off for weeks!”

“I literally came out with you last Thursday!” I counter, not missing the smirk setting on Harry’s face as he watches Nick and I’s back and forth. “And the Saturday before, come to think of it I’m always out with you Nicky.”

“Not when Harry’s in town though n’ that’s a different kinda night.” Nick laughs, his beer sloshing slightly in his free hand as his other remains draped over Harry’s shoulders.

That was maybe the first sign of my slight resentment for Harry. All night I wandered around with Theo hearing little bits of conversations, all surrounding the star of the party. I understood this wasn’t his doing, his humility was clear in every one of his bashful attempts to turn the conversation away from his growing achievements and onto literally anything else. He was, however, a self-proclaimed narcissist. Every time somebody would swoon over him and insist he stay the topic of conversation, a smirk tugged at his lips and stayed there as he consumed the endless and animated praise from almost all the party guests.

I’d expected some of his qualities to be untrue, learning from the past never to believe blindly of someone’s pure character when you didn’t truly know them. Especially when they frequented the gossip columns. But it wasn’t him so much, he was true to his motto of kindness and courteous even as people fawned over him, it was more the attention that surrounded him. As the night went on it became clear what Nick meant even if he didn’t know it himself. A night out with Harry was different because everyone made sure to capitalize off how different he made them feel.

. . . . .

“Can I get you anything else M’am?” The young waitress asks as she clears up my empty mug and saucer. My eyes falter a little as they adjust from the blue light of my laptop I’ve been staring at for the last twenty minutes.

“Um- oh please could I just get a refill?” I ask.

“Sure thing - mint tea right?” She smiles, adjusting the mug in her hands to make a quick note.

“Yeah..s’perfect - thank you.” She’s gone before she hears my delayed gratitudes, definitely used to the throngs of bemused writers tapping away at their laptops for hours.

I turn back to my open google doc. So far it’s written in two parts I have no idea how to connect and my senseless rereading hasn’t resulted in any legitimate progress in almost an hour. I’d accept the rut I’m stuck in and work on something else for the day if I didn’t only have the day. Last night had been filled with plans of settling in early and finishing the last two thousand words on an upcoming sustainable clothing brand. That all went out the window of course as my phone buzzed off the kitchen counter with Nick’s insistence of yet another night out to celebrate ending the work week - his was quite different to mine. It was easy to ignore the persistent beeping of my phone as new texts and call notifications popped up every three minutes, but less so when the rhythmic bursts of noise were replaced by knocks on my front door.

Within 40 minutes of opening it to Nick in a silk shirt and jeans too skinny for someone pushing thirty, I was two drinks in and dancing to Blue DeTiger with a pair of hands on my waist that I didn’t entirely recognise. It was just the six of us: Me, Nick, Ellie, Theo, Julia and Harry.

He was hard to ignore, not that I was trying particularly hard. On the drive over, the limited backseat space in Nick’s car and close proximity had practically forced me into his lap. Even with thighs pressed tightly against each other, we hardly talked, a few polite hellos here and there and then silence as we listened to Eleanor recall her latest night with whichever blonde bassist was her ‘soulmate’ that week. The whole ride over, Harry kept his hands on the thigh closest to the door and leant his shoulders the same way as to touch me as little as possible - which was still quite a lot considering the packed five seater pushing seven passengers. It was fairly common knowledge we weren’t close and I got the feeling he wasn’t too keen on me, but he could at least not act like touching me would be the worst thing ever.

As the night went on he clung to Theo, ever the cuddly drunk, and I stayed more to the pleasant stranger I’d found on the dance floor.

No meanest was ever intended between us but I couldn’t help but watch the kindergarten like bitterness grow as everyone just loved him. We couldn’t go anywhere without a crying fan or two approaching the sweet and smiling man who always answered their questions affectionately and hugged them goodbye. The times he was out of town were always filled with comments about his absence, as if none of us were good enough without his added presence. I couldn’t help but wonder why they even bothered to bring me into their little group. The lack of closeness between Harry and I felt almost like a lack of closeness to the group as a whole, despite how much my individual friendships with everyone advanced.

Just as I thank the waitress - Alice, her name tag read, and take the first sip of my third tea (I had to switch after a particularly strong starter coffee) I notice a familiar man out the corner of my eye looking just as rough as me. Of course he’s wearing it better than I am.

Harry collects a drink from the counter and bows his head slightly in thanks, turning and catching my eye just as he’s on his way out. He waves with his free hand and shoots me a candid smile before making a quick change in direction towards my small table.

“Long time no see,” He pulls the chair opposite me out a little as he chuckles at his own joke. He perches lightly, temporarily. “How’ve you been?”

“A little hungover, I won’t lie..” I laugh, surprised by the whole encounter. “You?”

“Same, I might have had a shot or two too many,” I nod knowingly and shut my laptop softly. He sips what smells like coffee before going on. “Are ya workin? Sorry to interrupt.”

“Oh no- I mean I am but it doesn’t matter really, ‘ve kinda hit a dead end.” His eyes hover, waiting for me to go on. “I was gonna get it done last night but Nick had other plans..”

“Yeah Nick’ll do that to you,” He laughs, “What’re you writing ‘bout?”

He leans slightly forwards, holding eye contact and shuffling comfortably into his chair.

“Oh just this promotional piece on a new company, they’re hiring young women and training them to make these handmade clothes. They’re paying them above minimum wage and focusing on sustainability so this editor I’ve written for before offered me it.” I’m not really sure how sincere he is in his curiosity, he always seems to have time to listen when Julia has a new design plan or Theo’s found a new artist but that’s different really. I stop before I start to ramble, just in case.

“That’s so cool, what kinda stuff are they making?” He prompts, resting his chin on his fist, imitating the posture of an eager little kid.

“They've started stocking stuff by other independent artists but mostly dungarees and these cool cord trousers, they’d suit you actually, even got some 70s style ones.” Now that the two worlds are colliding in my head, I can’t help but imagine Harry in a pair of their forest green cords, the wide legs would almost bury his vans but a part of me is pretty sure he’d love them.

“Thanks, if they come at your recommendation I might have to get my hands on a pair,” He smiles, his tone’s a lot different to the usual polite cheer, it’s difficult to place where it’s landed before he’s talking again. “Reminds me of that show you took us to with the upcycled clothes, all those dungarees made of old quilts - remember?”

It’d been a small exhibit just outside of London I’d mentioned offhandedly and somehow ended up showing everyone around. It was nice to have them all in my world for an evening. Marcus, a friend of mine from college, had put it together and created a lot of the pieces. He and the others I’d met through my work were fairly shocked to say the least when Harry Styles came traipsing through the doors behind me. All night he quietly asked Nick questions, to which Nick only responded by motioning towards me and wandering off to the bar.

“I do - I’m surprised you do to be honest.” It slips before I can decide if it sounds passive aggressive or not. To be fair, it had been a surprise to me, meeting everyone at the train station and watching Harry and Nick scramble out a taxi and run towards us. He’d been dressed in proper gallery attire and seemed genuinely thrilled to be joining in on the rare night I actually played host.

“Course I do, it was a good night...I’d choose it over Nick’s tequila Tuesdays anyday.” His phone buzzes on the table, a text popping up in green. “Oh I- my manager’s waiting sorry.”

A sheepish smile is accompanied by a loose arm movement towards the door where, out on the street, I see Jeff. He’s shaking his head and motioning for Harry to hurry up. Had Harry sat down to talk to me whilst his manager had been waiting this whole time?

“It was good running into you, good luck with it all,” He stands. “See you friday yeah?”

I’d totally forgotten about his “Whenever I’m in town Friday film night.” until he mentioned it. I’d been twice in the past and stayed quietly to my corner of the sofa, only watching as everyone else laughed at whatever romcom had been chosen that night.

“I-maybe.” He shakes his head as I smile, not quite ready to commit a whole evening to watching Nick raid Harry’s wine cellar.

“You better, I’m gonna need to hear more ‘bout those cords.” He points his hand in a kind of joking reprimand/wave before he’s gone back down the aisle of tables to the door where Jeff ruffles a hand through his hair and laughs when his hands fly to fix the now birdnest of brown curls.

I open my laptop back up, skimming over the last few lines I wrote to get myself back on track. I take a sip and my tea’s gone cold.

. . . . .

“Are you coming to Harry’s tonight?” Eleanor asks down the phone, her voice chipper as she no doubt raids her closet.

“Maybe, I don’t know..I’ve got this deadline Monday morning that I’m nowhere near meeting.”

“Come on Liv, we haven’t seen you all properly together since last month, and last week doesn’t count it was too loud to actually talk!” She chimes in, the sound of clothes being tossed to the floor clear in the distant background. “Have you got a problem with Harry or something?”

“No Elle, of course I don’t-”

“Then why do you guys never talk? You hardly come with us when he’s around and when you do you barely even say hello.” Eleanor complains, she’s mentioned it in the past but it’s been easy to blow off with excuses of how busy he usually was making his way around the room to greet everyone or how we just hadn’t known each other that long and weren't particularly close yet.

“I just...I don’t know, I don’t think he likes me very much.” I pause. I still haven't decided what last Saturday was in the cafe. “We’re not really close and I’d prefer not to spend another night listening to people tell him - and everyone else - how great he is.”

“You’re saying that like he’s some arrogant twit, if you came out with us more you’d see what he’s really like around his friends. Or you know, you could actually talk to him when we’re together and see that he’s not a dick?”

It was a fair point. I haven’t made much of an effort over the past year to spend any time with him outside of larger gatherings or to have genuine conversations with him that went past the weather or a new jacket one of us had on. Maybe he really is a good guy away from all the pretentious crowds and watchful eyes he usually called to our group. He’d certainly seemed different in the quiet Saturday surroundings of Blondies Coffee Roasters in between sips of coffee.

“Okay, okay yeah I’ll see you there.” We hang up a couple of minutes later and I’m left alone in my kitchen again.

. . . . .

“Hey!” Harry cheers as the door swings open to reveal him in yet another pair of flared pants that hung comfortably around his waist. “Come in, come in.”

We all pile in through the doorway as he steps aside. Arms weaving through each other as we hang coats and jackets and Julia passes Harry the fruit platter she’d made (and scolded us all for picking at on the drive over.)

“Oh very appropriate,” Harry laughs as he uncovers the tray to reveal an array of sliced watermelon, strawberries and grapes, He sets the fruit down on the table in the lounge for us all to eat and shakes his head lightly. I look up at Julia for an explanation but she’s too busy claiming the comfiest loveseat for the night. “I’m never telling you anything again, Jules.”

Julia and Harry tease each other for a moment more until Theo catches my confused stares and laughs to himself.

“Harry wrote a song ‘bout fruit- another one actually,” Theo starts, tucking himself beside Julia and letting her take over before he can finish. “S’not just about fruit though is it H?”

Harry blushes slightly and settles his glare on Julia as he carries six wine glasses through to the table.

“‘S about watermelon, it just has some..” He clears his throat as he fumbles for his next sentence. “Other themes to it too.”

“As if mate,” Theo’s laughter booms, “ Basically Liv, he wrote this new song the other day all about how much he loves to-”

“Watermelon!” Harry yells, pointing an accusatory finger at Theo. “S’all about how much I love watermelons...I’m a fruit guy.”

“Oh are we talking about the pussy song?”

All heads snap round to see Nick, obviously having let himself in and now chuckling softly to himself as he leans against the archway into the room.

“Oh sorry H, were you tryna give an interview answer?”

Harry just slaps his palm over his eyes and lets his shoulders shake for a minute before he bounces back to host mode.

“Okay!” I can’t help but notice how flushed the tips of his ears are as he claps his hands together, desperately trying to move on from the conversation. “Who wants wine?”

Fifteen minutes later everyone is settled onto the sofas with an array of throws between us and a layout of fruits, crisps and other mid rom com snacks that make me feel bad I left my flat in too much of a hurry to remember anything but hummus.

“Okay - Sixteen Candles, When Harry Met Sally or Mamma Mia?” Nick calls out, waving the tv remote above his head to get everyone's attention. An outpour of votes follows - you’d think between only six of us we’d be able to sort out a process by now but still we fall into momentary anarchy as the room divides.

“Mamma Mia is a classic!” Eleanor protests as Nick’s shaking his head.

“And Billy Crystal isn’t?” He yells back, eyes wide and genuinely offended.

“Colin Firth is arguably more iconic, Nick really, come on.” Theo sighs. He accepts the high fives Ellie and I reach out to him and saluts us both.

“We’ve all seen Mamma Mia before though, we’ve never watched When Harry Met Sally all together,” Julia points out, winning a smirk and nod of approval from Nick.

There’s a beat of silence while Nick weighs up the votes in his head. He tilts to the side slightly and eyes Harry up, our gazes following.

“Harry?”

“Ellie?”

“Come on, you’ve got the last vote here, and I know how much you like Meryl.” Nick gasps a little, the mention of Meryl Streep as a wager to win Harry over to his opposing team was definitely foul play in his eyes.

“Yeah but he loves When Harry Met Sally...and he is a narcissist..” Julia offers into the debate, a few snickers follow her comment before we all turn to look at Harry. We’re all already half a glass in but I could swear for just a moment his eyes lingered over me, fluttering down to my smile before turning back to announce his decision to Nick.

“I’m afraid I am in the mood for a bit of Abba,” Cheers and not so subtle murmurs of frustration fill the lounge as Nick scrolls through the Romance bar on Netflix before clicking on the film of just over half of our choosing.

Everyone goes quiet as the film starts, breaking out into bursts of song only as the cast does. From the conversation in the car, it’s pretty clear everyone has just been through a pretty tiring week. We all tended to pile our workload a little heavy so it was always nice to escape for a few hours at the weekend and relax together.

Just as Voulez-vous plays through the room, a slightly tipsy Nick leans into Harry to serenade the singer with his own rendition. The duo sway slightly, both narrowly avoiding Nick’s wild limbs before there’s a crash and Harry’s cursing.

“Oh- H, Sorry!”

Nick’s wine glass that’d been balanced on the coffee table in front of him moments before now lays on its side. The, luckily white, wine trickles down onto the rug but most noticeably splashes into Harry’s lap. I’m not entirely sure how he managed it, it must have flown forwards when it was knocked but Harry quickly stands to access the damage.

“I’m so sorry Harry I-”

“Don’t worry mate, I’m just gonna go change and toss these in the wash..could you wipe that up for me?” Nick nods, looking a little less cheerful and a lot more guilty now as Harry makes it way out the room. He calls behind him: “Keep watching I’ll only be a second!”

Nick finishes wiping down the table and rug just as Harry jogs back into the room. I don’t mean to and I’m never one to check people out..unless very subtly, but I can’t help but let my eyes linger a little.

He’s still in his plain tee but instead of his fancy pants he’s found some soft wash denim jeans. The whole look paired with his thick rimmed glasses and how his hair's gotten tousled about by Nick throughout the night just made him look so...ordinary. Not in any bad way, anyone who met Harry knew he could never be ordinary, no matter how casual he dressed, but something about seeing him abandon the more dressed up looks and go for the comfortable option just made him seem different.

In a second his green eyes are complimenting the look too as he gazes down at me.

“Hi,” He mouths, nobody’s taken much notice of his return, yet another musical number taking everyone’s attention. It’s my turn to blush a little now. I avert my eyes quickly, anywhere really, before sneaking a quick look up at him to smile back.

Ellie had helped Nick in the “For fucksake save Harry’s rug it probably costs more than your car” mission and had stolen the seat beside him after they were done. It slipped my mind until Harry set the new bottle of wine on the table and sunk down into the space beside me, He curls one leg underneath him and slips me one more smile before turning back to the screen just as Donna and Sam start singing SOS.

. . . . .

“Ah shit, I think I left my book!” I curse just as we make it down the road to Julia’s car. Parking was shit so by the time we found a spot we’d ended up a good 15 minutes away from Harry’s house. “You guys go on, I’m only round the corner anyway.”

Theo and Julia were familiar with my stubbornness so let me go, yelling their goodbyes after a few hugs as they drove away, Ellie and Nick do the same as they clamber into a taxi. I turn quickly in the chilly air and make my way back down the street to Harry’s drive, punching in the familiar code at his gate before running up to the door hastily.

It was open - as always, so I let myself in. He was probably still cleaning the lounge up after we all got a little too tipsy.

“Hey it’s me...just left my book sorry!” I call down the hallway. It’s quiet despite the light Paul Simon playing in the distance so I make my way quickly to the sofas I’d spent most of the night on, praying to avoid an awkward run-in with Harry.

Although we’d actually shared some light conversation throughout the night and a handful of smiles, I’m not sure we’re quite at the stage in our friendship that me more or less breaking into his house wouldn’t be awkward to run into.

The lounge is empty when I get there. The side tables are still littered with wine glasses and tacky red rings on coasters but no Harry in sight. Or book for that matter.

I start pulling back the cushions carefully - god knows how much they cost. Despite scouring the one spot I’d pretty much clung to the whole night - incidentally beside Harry - I have no luck. Nick tossed the book back to me at some point in the night after reading it by my recommendation but knowing him it could have ended up anyway. I follow the breadcrumbs of our night down another hallway as I vaguely remember Nick talking about a certain plot twist as we searched Harry’s kitchen cupboards for the wine he’d sent us off to restock.

As I come around the white archway into his kitchen I catch a glimpse of him from around the kitchen island. He has his back turned to me but he’s leant forwards against a counter with ring covered fingers clutching the edge, a glass of amber liquid set slightly away from him.

“Oh, sorry I was just-” He jumps a little at my voice, turning quickly to face me with his now free hands coming up to hold his chest. When his eyes finally meet mine they’re red and it takes a second for him to register the tears still streaming from them before he replies.

“Shit, fu- what are you..are you alright?” His hands bat between tangling into his hair and wiping the tears from his cheeks, anything to avoid actually looking up at me again.

“Yeah, I just..um..left my book,” I mumble, taking a step closer to him when I notice how his hands shake as they move timidly around his face. “Harry, what’s wrong?”

“Uuuh um.” He wanders for a moment before slapping a palm lightly atop the counter and pulling out his infamous grin. “Nothing much, how bout you - find your book?”

“-Harry..” I take another step close, “I know we’re not, ya know..close. But you can talk to me.”

There’s a beat of silence when he keeps up the act, I’d almost believe it if it wasn’t for his bloodshot eyes and anxious fingers drumming against the tile.

“What’s wrong?”

He pauses for a moment, assessing whether or not to tell me whatever’s weighing so heavy on his shoulders. But the dam bursts.

“Fuckin’ everything Love” He laughs, rubbing his palms over his face. I try to focus on the matter at hand: Harry weeping in his kitchen. But that name’s only ever left his mouth directed at me a handful of times and it’s never made my stomach flutter quite as it did just now. “Just..Fuck I’m so lonely Olivia.”

I don’t really know any of the details but between conversation - mostly overheard, and the media frenzy, it was hard not to be aware of Harry’s break up two months ago. I can’t claim we were close enough to discuss it, having hardly ever talked beyond trivial issues, but I knew that despite them only being together two or so months, he’d been incredibly distant for the weeks that followed the break up.

“I hear about you and Aubre..I’m really sorry it didn’t work out for you guys-” Harry laughs almost, a pained sort of chuckle that told me I was way off with this one.

“It’s not..that isn’t why I..” He takes a deep breath before lifting his head up slightly to focus on where his fingers still tapped out a nervous beat on the counter. “I was lonely before her...and with her. I just, I can’t seem to get it right ever...feels like nobody wants to be with me for the right reasons.”

“Hey no..what about tonight? Your house was full of so many people who love you yeah? Maybe your bougie wine collection had something to do with it but still,” He laughs at that, peeking up from behind his fringe for just a moment. “They- we love you ‘k?”

“I know but, ‘clock hits the am and everyone leaves, it just gets...it gets so fucking lonely to see everyone in perfect pairs ya know?”

I don’t really know what I’m doing but I’m doing it - my arms wrap over his shoulders and lock with a hand at the nape of his neck. We’ve never hugged before beyond a general greeting but anyone watching wouldn’t know it, his face burrows quickly into my shoulder and his arms cocoon over my waist, holding me tightly and slipping under the thick layers of my jacket.

“I know exactly what you mean, H.”

The hug lasts longer than I imagined it might. He smells of vanilla and the coffee he brought back in bulk from Jamaica. He lets out a shaky breath and melts further into me, nuzzling my neck softly with the tip of his nose. His curls are soft between my fingers and I find myself shhing him, lulling us both into a tired kind of calm.

Another moment passes in the silence of his kitchen before Harry lets out an awkward cough and straightens up, pulling out of our hold and immediately covering his face with his palms again.

“I..sorry Jules and Theo must be waiting for you..” Harry murmured, wiping the last of his tears away and letting his hands fall and fidget by his sides.

“Oh no don’t worry they..um they already went I was actually just gonna walk.” I tell him, making his head perk up a bit.

“Wha-It’s past twelve Liv it’s not safe, how far do you even live?” He clears his throat and his voice is clearer now, it feels like a whole different world to the one we were in just a minute ago.

“It’s fine honestly, only take like thirty minutes walking - I’ve done it before-” I ramble, eager to put this situation behind me before I embarrass myself anymore.

“No - let me drive you yeah?” Harry shakes his head, adamant.

“Harry..we’ve been drinking all night, I think that’s more dangerous than me jus’ walking.” I laugh, holding his gaze for a second longer than I usually would - fuck, how do we usually act around each other?

Before I come to a conclusion, his eyes rest heavy on mine and I can see the cogs turning in his brain as he tries to work his way out of this one. Ever the people pleaser.

“Then stay.”

“Harry-”

“You said you know how it feels.” He cuts in, unwavering now as he doesn’t let my eyes fall from his. “So stay …’s safer anyway.”

. . . . .

“I can take the sofa, really Harry I don’t mind,” I reassure as he tosses me an old t-shirt and joggers to sleep in. “It’s comfier than my bed anyway.

His guest bedrooms had just been painted and were still pretty fume filled so the sofa or his bed were the only options. For twenty minutes now he’s tried to convince me to take his bed and leave him on the sofa, despite the fact we both know he’s a little too tall to sleep without his feet hanging off the end.

“But you’re my guest!” He protests again, coming up from his wardrobe to stand in front of me, hand on hips and an expression of concern on his face.

“And you’re almost six foot!”

“Hey, I am six foot.” He takes a deep breathe, exhaling through his nose in defeat before speaking again. “Okay, you can sleep on the sofa but if anyone asks I was the perfect host and you bullied me into this.”

I laugh softly, this whole new side of Harry had never been directed solely at me before and it was honestly refreshing. Usually Nick or another friend was the target of his jokes and playful demeanor and I only noticed it from afar but now he was right in front of me, hauling pillows off his bed and sticking his tongue out when he caught me staring.

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” He asks for the third time since I agreed to stay the night. We’ve just finished setting up the sofa to sleep on and despite the duvet and many quilts far more lush than my own actual bed, he seemed unconvinced it was enough.

“I’m sure” I sit back into the pile of blankets and pillows, tucking my feet underneath me and looking back up at Harry. “If you’re really not, just come watch a film with me and see how cozy it is.”

The quick change in dynamic was a lot smoother than I’d imagined. Within an hour of being alone together we’d already talked more than in all our past interactions, not to mention how close we’ve gotten. He only nods his head quickly and he’s settling under a quilt beside me, rummaging around for a controller to pull up netflix again.

“Mamma Mia two?” He asks.

I chuckle a bit and nod. At the beginning of the evening I hadn’t quite seen it ending in a Mamma Mia marathon with just me and Harry.

He presses play and as the opening display begins we both lean back into the sofa and pull the blankets up over us. It’s only in the quiet of the first few scenes that I notice we’re matching. We’re both dressed fully in his clothes, grey joggers and t-shirt - his rolling stones, mine fleetwood mac. And it all smells of him. I pull the blanket a little higher over my chest and the faint, but now familiar, scent of vanilla and coffee fills my lungs and for a second all I can focus on is how desperately I want to be in his arms again.

. . . . .

“-ow” A groggy voice mumbles from above me and I feel myself being pulled forwards slightly against something hard - and warm.

I’m a few seconds from falling straight back asleep before I feel the painful ache in the side of my neck. I reach a hand up to gauge my current situation and feel my fingers plunging into soft hair - soft hair that ends too soon to be mine.

“Hi..” I recoil my hand quickly back to my side and push myself up so I’m sitting slightly. I look down and see Harry, half asleep still and hand still resting on my side.

“Oh-hey sorry,” What do you say when you wake up beside the guy you barely knew but simultaneously had been incredibly vulnerable with just the night before?

Harry seems to be waking up now and certainly more aware of our predicament as he pulls his hand away from where it was holding firmly onto the material of my - his - t-shirt and pushes himself up to sit against the arm of the sofa.

“We must have fallen asleep..sorry I didn’t mean too, ya know…” His eyes flutter between where I sit opposite him and the “Are you still watching?” Netflix screen.

“It’s fine, accidents happen an’ everything.” I smile, slipping out from the warm cocoon of blankets to stand. “I’m just gonna wash up quickly and I’ll be out of you hair.”

Before I can rush off to tame my hair and hopefully find some toothpaste to rid me of my morning breath, Harry clasps his hand gently around my wrist and tugs slightly to get my attention.

“Not in a rush Love, I’ll make us some breakfast.” He says it effortlessly, like it was a regular occurrence for us to fall asleep cuddling on his sofa. He stands, groaning as his knees pop appreciatively and lets my hand go before he’s disappearing into the kitchen.

“Okay…” I murmur to myself. “....okay.”

. . . . .

Alice is back at my table with my second refill before 11am. I thank her and take a gulp of the fiery ginger tea before reading over the last three paragraphs I just wrote. The spice licks my tongue as I tip the cup up for a second sip; it’s autumn after all.

In the last two weeks September had slipped into October and all the trees in London had received the memo. I’d been busy, hoaled up in the quietest corner of Blondies the whole time with coffee filling all my senses. I haven’t seen everyone together since that night at Harry’s. I grabbed lunch with Eleanor the Monday afterwards and told her nothing, preferring to avoid the texts my phone amassed over the fortnight. I've turned down all proposed group activities and focused on work instead. To be fair, I do have a lot to get done. There were always seasonal pieces in my to do list and with the weather getting colder it was time I got to them before it was Christmas already.

I haven’t talked to Harry either. He made us pancakes with blueberries and maple syrup in the morning and we haven’t even texted since; I’m not sure that we even have a private text between us. Eleanor and Julia have told me how much fun they’ve all had the times I’ve politely but persistently declined, I can only assume Harry’s in the mix with them all. He’s in town for awhile if I’m remembering our breakfast chatter correctly, it makes sense that they’re all hanging out together really when they don’t often get time together. Ellie’s phone calls keep me from sliding into thoughts of how easily I could fall right out of the group and not be missed, at least. I was just taking space for work. The fact that most of my afternoons at the cafe disappeared into me analysing anything I might ever have felt or said to Harry means nothing at all.

Neither does the heightened pace of my heartbeat when he walks through the stiff wooden doors of Blondies.

He orders what I assume is his regular black coffee, scans the room for a second and lands directly on me. He hesitates a little to hold my gaze, turning his head to look outside before looking back at me and smiling. He thanks the server and takes a few quick steps towards me, weaving in between the packed tables to my little spot hidden away in the corner.

“Hi,” He smiles again, although his toneos overshadowed by a slight anxious hilt. “Can I sit?”

Nodding, I close my laptop and pull my tea closer to me to make a space for him.

“Hi.” He repeats, smiling a little sheepishly.

“Hi,” I wait a second, nervous to start when I’m so unsure of how this conversation has already gone in his head. But he doesn’t say anything so I push through and bite the bullet against my better judgement. “Look, about that Friday I-”

“Can I just-” He cuts me off, leaning forwards and opening his hands out as he mulls over his next few words. “I’m sorry if it was awkward at all, I didn’t mean for anything to happen and I thought we were fine an’ everything but then I haven’t seen you in two weeks and Ellie keeps saying you’re not comin’ out. Did I do something wrong?”

“Oh god no,” I hurry, “You didn’t do anything it was just - I didn’t expect to wake up..like that...and it was just a really quick change because we’ve never really been close and suddenly it was just, us, like that.”

He nods, pushing a loose curl back a second later that broke free in the motion. He seems understanding as he looks down before leaning his elbows against the table so only the two of us can hear what he’s about to say.

“I know, I didn’t expect it either but, can I just tell you I’m glad that it happened?” He leaves a three second pause for me to flounder in confusion before continuing. “What I told you, ‘bout feeling lonely, it messes with my sleep all the time. I just get stuck in my own thoughts but the night you stayed over I slept fine - perfect even.”

Not sure what else to do with this new information, I nod for him to continue.

“I know we’ve never been close, but hanging out with you just really calmed me down.” He smiles, gaining confidence now in his vulnerability tucked away in our little hiding place. “Thank you for staying.”

“I get what you mean.” I mumble, slightly anxious any of the busy customers with prying eyes could overhear my confession. “I never really know when to stop working and I think I got the best night sleep on your sofa I’ve had in awhile, which really speaks volumes about how crappy my mattress is.”

He chuckles. Relief seems to settle in as he lets his shoulders relax and face soften.

“I was thinking - especially now that I know it was good for you as well, maybe it could become more of a regular thing?” He asks, his forefinger and thumb pinch together and twist one of his rings a little - a nervous habit, I’m sure.

“How do you mean?”

“Like..when we all go out, maybe we go home together, you know - so we can sleep better.” He moves down to focus on the metal rose he’s still fumbling at. “If..if you don’t want to or you think it’d be weird it’s fi-”

“I’d like that.” I reach forwards to comfort him, absentmindedly cupping my fingers around his. “I think it’d be nice, to get a good night's sleep I mean.”

“I’m glad.” He beams.

“..That and you make a mean blueberry pancake.” I tease, earning a light chuckle from Harry.

Just like our last cafe encounter, the ping of a his phone beats me to my new few words. He checks it quickly, shaking his head and glancing down the large room to the shop front where, once again, Jeff waits. He seems a little more agitated this time, waving vigorously whilst trying not to attract the attention of passersby, all rather unsuccessfully.

“Bollocks okay - I’ve gotta go,” Harry swears, collecting his coffee from the table and pushing his chair back quickly. “I’ll just - we can text before we go out next yeah?”

“Cool, yeah - wait a sec, let me just give you my number.” I reach up for him to hand me his phone but he doesn’t make any effort to move, instead he blushes slightly and stares at the floor. “..What?”

“I um, I already have it.” He fiddles with the hair at the nape of his neck before talking again. It’s hard not to remember how it felt when it was my fingers carding through his brown curls. “I got it from Theo awhile back when we were going to this thing, felt weird not having it. I hope that..okay and everythin’”

I nod, smiling up at him. The idea of him having a part of me for this past year without me even knowing is oddly precious. The fact that he felt odd about not having my number and going to the effort of getting it from Theo was unbelievably endearing.

“That’s fine, helpful actually.” I smile still, “Text me before we meet everyone and we’ll make a plan or somethin’”

“Okay,” He smirks, his slight cocky nature reemerging. “Will do, Liv. See you soon?”

“See you soon.”

Jeff flies a hand up to his hair like before but this time is met with a grinning Harry who doesn’t seem to mind so much.

. . . . .

Unknown Number

‘Hey! Is tonight good? We can slip off after drinks at the gallery. H x’

I look down at my phone. Caught off guard by the sudden text, I’d almost forgotten out arrangement. Julia invited us all to a gallery opening of one of her friend's new exhibits. Even as I flicked through my wardrobe for the right jacket, I hadn’t put two and two together and realised I’d be seeing Harry again for the first time since our chat at Blondies four days ago.

I save his number and I think quickly, not wanting to leave him on read when he knew I’d be leaving to see them all any second and most likely spend the whole tube journey on my phone.

‘Hi :) That’d work for me yh, just let me know when you want to leave and I’ll make an excuse. Liv x’

With another thought rushing through my head, I send a quick follow up.

‘Can we keep this between us right now? Might be a bit tricky to explain to the others.”

Harry

‘Read my mind love.’

‘See you in a bit :)’

I’m still not the hugest fan of the airy feeling that rushed through my stomach as I read over the pet name. He was just from Manchester, it was normal up there to call everything by casually affectionate little names. It didn’t mean anything at all.

. . . . .

“Livia!” Nick calls out when he sees me scanning over the faces at the entrance to the gallery. I smile instantly and make my way over, quickly falling into his arms as he rocks us for a second. “Haven’t seen you in an age!”

“‘Ve been working, we can’t all piss about Monday to Friday.” I giggle, smiling wide as he murmurs something under his breath and plants a big kiss on my cheek. “Is everyone here?”

I try not to look suspicious when I peak over around us, trying to pick a certain brunette from the crowd.

“Yeah, they’re just over there with Julia’s friend.” Nick points and I see him immediately. He’s dressed just as I expected - half gucci half grandpa sweaters. “I’m gonna get us drinks, meet you there?”

“Mhmmm” I hum, breaking out of his hold and slipping through the crowds to our small group of friends.

“Hi!” Julia smiles brightly. She hugs me quickly before stepping aside to give Eleanor and Theo their turns. They all whisper quiet ‘Missed yous’ in my ear as if I’ve been gone for years.

“Hey,” Harry appears by my side as everyone else turns their attention to the front of the crowd where it looks like the artist is setting up to introduce the night. “How’ve you been?”

“In the last four days?” I chuckle, “Good. Not been sleeping great, but I’ve got a lot of work done so that’s been great.”

He nods approvingly. A smile tugs at his lips at the mention of sleep, almost like some secret inside joke we’ve managed to form between just the two of us.

“Me neither. Jeff’s been buggin’ me what feels like every hour with deadlines.” I find myself squeezing his hand a little under his long coat sleeves so nobody can see. “Looking forward to just collapsing tonight, if I’m honest.”

“Me too.” I smile tiredly, tonight had been a big ask come to think of it. I've had work piled up twice my height all week and even having worked day in and day out I’ve still only made a crack in the mountain of final edits and emails to respond to.

Harry squeezes my fingers back and our hands linger in each other's hold until Nick emerges beside us and the artist begins her speech.

. . . . .

The comfortable chatter surrounding the booth we’d taken up a few hours ago died down as the clock ticked later and later. We’d left the gallery a while ago now in favour of the after party at a pub down the road but by now the heavy scent of beers and various gin based concoctions were giving us all headaches.

“I think I’m gonna call it a night guys,” Harry announces, a slew of groans following from the group. “Sorry, sorry! It’s been great but it’s getting late.”

Julia and Theo move out the way to let him out the booth. He slides across the red cushion to stand, pulling his coat over himself as he sneaks a quick look at me.

“I think I’m gonna head off too,” I smile, waiting for Eleanour to stand and let me out as another wave of complaints flooded me. “Sorry! I’ve got work and the tube’ll be hell any later.”

“Well if Harry’s going too couldn’t he take you home?” Julia suggests, looking between the two of us as we now stand slightly away from each other. “You drove right?”

“Yeah, I did.” Harry turns to smile at me, amused clearly by how our plan was being unknowingly encouraged by our friends. “C’mon, I’ll drive yeh.”

I nod, biting back a smirk. We say our goodbyes and wave as we slip out the heavy pub doors out onto the road outside. It’s started to drizzle slightly and I resent choosing the jacket without a hood.

“I’m just over here,” Harry points a little ways off. “Hurry, think it’s about to pour.”

We walk quickly down the street and through a metal gate into a car park when there’s a loud rumble of thunder and immediately the rain thickens.

“Fuck!” Harry laughs as he scrambles for his keys, we match each other's paces until we’re practically sprinting to his car in the far corner of the lot. The click of the locks sounds out and his lights flash red a second before we’re both pulling the doors open and throwing ourselves inside onto warm seats.

We catch our breath, chests rising and falling with uneven pants before our laughter settles and Harry slots the keys into the ignition.

. . . . .

“Do you want anything to eat?” Harry asks as he closes his front door behind us and we kick out shoes off in his hall. “I think I have some takeout menus somewhere..”

“I’m not really hungry, thanks though,” I cut off his search as he walks through to his kitchen and starts opening draws. “Kinda just wanna go to bed now.”

He nods and rubs a hand under his eye in silent agreement of my exhaustion.

“I’ll make us a tea, meet you up there yeah?” He calls over his shoulder, having turned quickly to retrieve various packets from his cupboards. “Chamomile okay?”

“Yeah chamomiles good,” I hover for a second in the archway leading into the kitchen, suddenly awkward to be alone in his house again. “Where um..where is it?”

He looks over his shoulder at me, slightly confused. His eye brows unfurrow when I motion behind me.

“Oh- just up the stairs and third room down the hall..on the left.” He smiles, turning back to the cupboard to look through his extensive mug collection.

I nod to myself, spinning on my heel and making my way up his stairs. I’ve never gone beyond the downstairs of his house before and even then I stuck to the kitchen, dining room and lounge. It felt odd to suddenly have access to something as intimate as his bedroom, I try not to overthink things as I push open the third door I see.

The first thing I see is his large bed, there’s probably enough room for three people on it and there’s definitely enough pillows to go around. The room as a whole is tidy, whether it’s always like that or only organised so precisely for my visit, I don’t know, but the thought makes my stomach flutter.

I walk up to the side of the bed with no charger on it’s table and set my bag down. We hadn’t talked about the logistics of our...arrangement, but I’d brought the basics to last me through the night. I plug my charger into the wall and take out my wash bag and a set of clothes to sleep in before sliding my bag under the table. I look around for a second. Somehow I hadn’t really thought through the fact that by the end of the night, I’d be in Harry’s bed. With Harry. In a completely platonic way with the only function to soothe our mutually crappy sleeping habits.

I hear Harry walking up the stairs just as I slip into the un suit to wash up and get changed. He’s humming a song under his breath. The clink of mugs being set down is followed by wardrobe doors opening and closing and a light thud of clothes being thrown on the bed.

I wait a few minutes to make sure I don’t walk in on him changing. Opening the door tentatively, I step out into the room in a large sweater and pajama shorts. Harry turns to look at me, he’s in the same t-shirt he wore last time and a pair of boxer shorts and the whole situation suddenly seems so amusing. After just one night of falling asleep on the sofa together, not having ever talked before, here we are standing at our most vulnerable about to cuddle in his bed together.

“Hi.”

“Hey,” He nods, looking down at himself. “Hope this is okay...I don’t want to make you uncomfortable or-”

“It’s fine,” I reassure him, “I didn’t really know what to wear either.”

His eyes flicker down my body and he smiles back up at me. He motions to the bed and we both nod a little awkwardly before making our way over to our sides. I climb in and instantly let a small groan out as my body sinks into the mattress, the pillows and duvet feel almost like a cloud as I burrow under and pull my tea up to my lips.

Harry chuckles from beside me, I peak over the mug to seem him grinning down from where he sits slightly taller in the bed.

“Sorry, you look comfy.” He laughs a little,

“I am, your bed’s insane.” I set my mug down and turn to him, bouncing slightly to emphasise the quality of his mattress that probably cost more than a year of my rent. “I really should start earning millions, feel like it’d suit me.”

He returns his tea to the bedside table and copies me, turning to face me with his legs crossed.

“It definitely would.” He smiles, bouncing a little before I let out a yawn. “Tired?”

“Exhausted.” I mumble, hand still covering half my face. Harry reaches behind him to turn to switch the lights above his headboard off before pulling the duvet back for us to slip under.

“C’mere,” Without hesitating, I shuffle back slightly until I can feel his chest behind me and an arm come up to rest around my hip. “‘This okay?”

“Mhmmm,” I hum, “What about our teeth?”

“We’ll brush ‘em in the morning,” I nod, groaning again as all the aches in my body subside as I sink into his arms and the foam mattress. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” I mumble, embarrassed to have let myself go so easily around him. “Your mattress is just unbelievable. Might have to make this a regular thing.”

I speak before I think, mind clouded with sleep and my eyes already fighting to stay open.

“That’s the plan, love.”

. . . . .

When I wake up, Harry’s arms are tight around my middle and his body’s like a furnace behind me. I vaguely recall pulling my sweater off in the night to cool down as I lay now only in a vest and shorts. I slept better than I have in months though, despite the warm breaths on my neck turning my cheeks flushed.

The mix of Harry’s company and his safe haven of a mattress made for the perfect night sleep. I push back slightly into his chest and feel his arms tighten around me and a low murmur of his voice in my ear. The clock on my bedside table reads 6:30. It’s a Saturday and I can quite easily imagine spending the rest of my day - weekend even, exactly like this.

I slip back to sleep for a little awhile before I’m woken up to a low groan behind me. Harry shifts slightly, burying his face in the base of my neck and squeezing around my waist again. He must still be half asleep to be this comfortable with me.

I’m proven right when it takes another fifteen minutes for him to poke his head up over my shoulder and mumble:

“Breakfast?”

. . . . .

Our routine works smoothly for weeks. After sleeping so well the first few times, it became a given that we’d pile into Harry’s car after every night out with our friends and go back to his. Sometimes we’d get takeout or watch a film, but it wasn’t so rare that we’d just stumble out of his car, or a taxi - depending what the night had entailed, and walk with eyes almost closed straight to bed.

I stopped bringing things every night about two weeks in when a new toothbrush appeared next to Harrys and an oversized t-shirt of Harrys found its way onto my side of the bed. We also ditched the awkward pleasantries. Spending two or three nights a week in his house, I’d become pretty familiar with it all. I sometimes brought us breakfast if it was a weekend, or left a coffee beside the bed for him if I left for work first, We had very easily slipped into an oddly familiar sense of domesticity. It was strange to never mention any of it to our friends, it made it special though. We helped each other, and it was all just between the two of us. Nobody else knew Harry taught me how to make coffee just the way he likes it, or that we share his lavender shampoo sometimes.

“Ols?” Harry calls up the stairs to me. We’re running late to Julia and Theos anniversary dinner.

“Coming!” I yell back, reaching into his wardrobe to snatch a jacket before running down the stares.

“Oi! Slow down love, you’re gonna fall,” He complains, holding his hands out at the bottom of the stairs to catch me as I skid a little on the wooden floors of his hallway. “Hey! This’s mine!”

He tugs playfully on the opening of his jacket. I pull the fabric from his grasp and smile up at him.

“Not anymore…” He scrunches his nose up and pulls me towards him. The sudden movement pushed the air from my lungs suddenly. “-Fine! Just for tonight...nobody’ll notice anyway, you only just got his one.”

He shakes his head, bringing his fingers up to tickles across my stomach quickly before letting me go and clapping his hands.

“Shoes now!” He points down at my sock clad feet, “Come on we’re late already.”

I sling my bag over my shoulder and slip my boots on before trailing after him to the front door. He’s pulled his large green coat off the hangar before he’s looking back down at me, brows pulled together in confusion.

“What’ve got yeh bag for?”

“Ah see Harry, I tend not to leave my stuff places I don’t actually live.” I laugh.

“You’re not coming back tonight?” The confusion’s not joined by a hint of sadness as his hands fall from the door knob and he turns to face front on.

“Oh I..hadn’t thought ‘bout that. I’ve gotta water my plants.” I haven't been home in two days, I spent the whole day at Blondies yesterday then headed to Harry's after a few drinks with him and Nick. We’ve hung out around his house all day, sleeping in and finishing our last few bits of work for the week. “I can let them go a little dry I guess-”

“Can I come to yours?” Harry cuts me off to ask. “It’s just, I haven’t ever seen it..and that way your plant’ll be fine.”

I stay quiet for a second. Our world of sleepovers and movie marathons and home made curries for dinner existed within his house. My flat was small in comparisons to the homes of our friends, who were all, delicately put, pretty well off. Not that I wasn’t, I’d just gone into a lower paying area of my industry. I lived alone anyway so there wasn’t much point paying thousands in rent when I didn’t need much space.

“It’s fine it you want a night to yourself I can just-”

“It’s not that, H, I just didn't really think about how we only ever come here.” I mumble the last part, “Come back to mine, I don’t feel like going back on my own anyways.”

I smile a little, unsure of where we stand on the whole admitting we’d grown pretty dependent on each other’s presence, front. He smiles back, twisting the door open and holding it for me as I slip under his arm.

The car clicks unlocked and I settle into my seat. I reach over to push my seat belt in as Harry pulls his door shut and the car rumbles to a start.

“Can’t believe Jules and T have been together so long.” He sighs as we pull out onto the main road.

“Tell me about it,” I gaze out the window as rain dribbles lightly. “Feels like the year just went straight by.”

“They seem so happy still, like they’re still honeymooning,” Harry hums.

“I remember when they just started going out in Uni, even then it was obvious they’d end up together.”

“I like those kinds of people. The ones who make each other just completely themselves, ya know?” He glances over at me before turning back to the road.

“Yeah...they’re proper soulmates aren’t they.”

. . . . .

“Okay but seriously, what the fuck is up with you and Harry?” Eleanor bursts out as soon as we reach the bar. We’ve been sent off to get the third round whilst the others stayed at our favourite booth of the pub we frequented.

“Wait what?” I yell over the loud chatter of the pub, “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean!” She’s still waving her hand out for the bartender when she glances down at me again. “You’re tryna say you’re suddenly so close and nothing’s happened between you?”

“We’re not that close.” I quip, “We’ve just talked a bit more lately, I guess.”

“And nothing’s happened?” She raised a brow at me suspiciously. “You guys have left together every night for the past few weeks, just admit you have feelings for each other.”

“No, nothing’s happened.” I sigh, unsure if I sound convincing or not. “We just live close and it’s too cold now to get the tube back so late, he’s just being nice. You know Harry...he’s like that with everyone.”

Eleanor laughs a little, shaking her head. She places our order with the bartender when he makes his way to our side of the bar before turning back to me with her arms crossed.

“He’s nice to everyone, but he’s not just being nice to you.” She smirks, “And he usually doesn't give just anybody his clothes.”

She reaches out and rubs the fabric of my - Harrys - jacket between her thumb and forefinger. She looks up and quirks her brows up a little again. Before I can splutter out an explanation our drinks are being laid out on the counter beside us and Eleanor is pointing to the ones for me to carry and turning back to our booth.

A surge of anxiety washes over me as I follow Eleanor back to the group. My breaths feel unsteady and I can’t help but dart my eyes to get a quick glance at Harry to see if he’s experiencing the same kind of interrogation. He seems fine though, laughing at something Nicks said.

Soon we’re at the booth, slipping back into our seats and setting the drinks out in front of everyone. Harry’s eyes hover on me for a few seconds, brows raised a little in question. I smile and shake my head - everything’s fine.

I don’t miss how Eleanor glances between us throughout the whole night. Especially not when a different two get up for the next round and Harry and I are pushed next to each other when they climb back into the available seats. Harry seems a little suspicious too. He clearly hasn’t noticed Eleanor’s strange behaviour - or doesn’t care - because he’s kept gazing down at me every now and then since we came back with drinks hours ago. When I stop looking up at him, nervous Eleanor might question me about his constant and slightly nervous glances when we’re alone, he reaches his hand under the tables and pulls mine into his lap. He squeezes our hands every now and then. He’s always a touchy, cuddly drunk. Normally it’s a bit more obvious; he’ll wrap his arms around one of us on the dance floor or lap his head on a shoulder, nothing too intimate. Just friendly. But now he’s stroking his thumb over my knuckles and tapping out the beat of the current song playing with his foot, his knee bumping mine.

Julia and Theo are the first to go. Relief settles in me at the idea of not being the first two to leave for once. There’s no way Eleanor wouldn't’ve have noticed me and Harry sneaking the other a glance like we usually do to signal we’re ready to go, without some kind of distraction.

“It was so lovely guys, feels like we haven’t just sat down and talked in so long!” Julia smiles, leaning into Theos side tiredly as they say their goodbyes.

“I think I’m gonna head off too, it’s getting pretty late,” I smile, waiting for Harry to speak when Theo pipes up before him.

“Livs, you want a lift?” Theo looks down at me.

“Oh Olivia, that’s a good idea, you were just saying how it’s too cold for the tube.” Eleanor beams, smiling cheekily as she knows I’m the only one who’ll understand her subtle teasing.

“Oh I-” I stutter before Harry’s squeezing my hand again and looks up at Theo.

“I was actually gonna take her home, we’re only 10 minutes apart so it’s just easier.” He smiles politely, if I couldn’t feel his foot hooking over mine I’d believe he was just being nice and helping out a friend.

“Yeah but you’re gonna stay a little while aren’t you?” Julia countered, “We’re pretty close, it’s fine really.”

I nod, motioning to slide out of the booth. Harry lets me by, dropping my hand before anyone else could see. Julia, Theo and I say goodbye quickly and head out to the car park. As soon as we’re all strapped into their car, I pull out my phone and click Harry’s contact.

Meet me at mine x

Harry

Okay - what was that about?

I’ll explain when u get here, just something w Eleanor

U might have been right about the jacket :/

Theo pulls up outside my flat and I jump out the car, thanking them quickly and waving them off. I climb the stairs of my building and click the keys in my door, pushing it open and kicking my shoes off the second I get in. After a fifteen minute frantic clean, the place is looking slightly better. There’s no time to perfect it as I hear my phone buzzing on the counter, a dorky photo of Harry in one of his infamous sweaters all sprawled out on the sofa and sticking his tongue out at me flashes the screen.

“Hello?”

“Hey, I’m just outside,” He talks softly, “What number are you?”

“24, wait a sec and I’ll buzz you up.”

I tread quickly to the button by my front door and let him up, hearing a quiet thanks over the phone and a “See you in a sec” before the line goes dead.

A minute later there’s a quiet knock at my door. I open it and see Harry, he looks a little more tired than when I left him forty minutes ago, he rubs his knuckles under his eyes and sighs softly.

“Hey, come in.” I pull the door a little wider, stepping aside to let him inside. He walks past me, eyes watching the floor whilst I lock the up behind us and turn to face him. There's an awkward tension in the air that I haven’t experienced with Harry before, maybe a little that first night when I walked in on him in his kitchen, but nothing like this since we’ve gotten closer.

“What happened?” He asks quietly, lifting his head with an uncertain look on his face.”You barely even looked at me.

“I..” I stumble over what to say, I’ve been thinking I could just explain what Eleanor had said and have it done with but now I know we’re not going to be able to just leave this. If somebody’s going to find out about our arrangement then something would have to change. “Ellie thinks there’s something going on with us and she kept staring all night. I just, I couldn’t give her anything to be suspicious about.”

“S’that what you mean about the jacket?” I nod, “What did she say?”

“Just that we seemed closer, talk more I guess.” I sigh, “She didn’t believe anything I said.”

“What did you say?” He presses. His tone is unclear, he seems less hurt now and more focussed on getting answers from me.

“I just, I told her nothing’s happened.” I mumble, “She asked about us leaving together and I told her it was just because we lived close and it’s easier than the tube.”

Harry bobs his head a little, taking in what I’ve just told him before laughing a little. He shakes his head and brings his palms up to his face, cursing under his breath. We stand in the quiet of my hallway before he speaks up again.

“Can we still do this?” That catches me off guard. Of course I knew we’d have to stop sometime when one of us started dating or a friend found out, I just hadn’t thought seriously about it happening anytime soon. “If she does find out, would that be the worst thing in the world?”

I shake my head, taking a step towards him to close the gap between us that’d been building my nerves throughout this whole exchange.

“I don’t wanna stop hanging out.” I confess. Harry quirks his lips up a little, obviously relieved as he pulls me to his chest. He wraps his arms around my shoulders and rests his chin on my head as we breathe together for a moment. All the while we’ve been spending nights at his, there’s been no serious moments like this. We’ve opened up about vulnerable subjects and confessed more than we probably should have to each other, but never anything like this. There’d never been a time I thought I could lose him.

“What if something did happen.” He whispers into my hair.

“Like what?” I murmur, voice a little muffled by his jacket.

“Like..” He trails off a little and I’m pretty sure I hear him inhale a little and smell my hair. “Like what if I kissed you..or something.”

“Or something?” My chest tightens, stomach fluttering suddenly.

“Mmhhhmm,” He hums, “What would happen then?”

“Eleanor would have a field day.”

Harry laughs, shoulders shaking a little as he giggles above me. He loosens his grip on my and pushes away to create a little space to see me again.

“Oh yeah?” He teases.

“Uh huh,” I smile, “She’d never let us forget it if she knew she was right.”

“And what would she be right about?” Harry lifts his hand to cup my face, tilting it slightly to make sure I’m staring right up at him.

“..Something..happening.” I whisper, “Having feelings for eachother.”

Harry grins, cheeks a soft rosy between the outside cold and the new blush. He strokes the pad of his thumb against my cheek and beams down at me.

“Oh yeah?”

“Uh huh…”

“Really..she’d be right about that?”

“I’m pretty sure-”

Before I can tease anymore, Harry’s leaning down to press his lips against mine. I inhale sharply, closing my eyes and looping my arms around the back of his neck to hold us in place. His hand still holds my face firmly, thumb fluttering over my cheek a couple times before he pulls away and we both breathe in deep.

“She’s definitely right.” He smiles, tone turning serious for a moment. “I really like you Olivia.”

Butterflies surge through my stomach for the millionth time since he walked through my door. Blushing and happy, I tighten my arms and push my face back into his shoulder.

“I like you too H….just a little bit.”

“We don’t have to tell anyone, just want this to be ours for a little while.” I can hear the smile in his voice as he leans back down to whisper into my ear.

“I want this to be ours forever.” I hum, words quiet and part of me hoping he doesn't hear my honest confession.

A comforting quiet settles over us. I remember how tired I really am as I melt further into Harry’s body, breathing in the sweet cinnamon and vanilla scent. His breathing lulls me half to sleep as I let my eyes flutter shut and bury my head further into his neck. I feel him lifting me up as my body relaxes against his and I catch his last few words before I he’s shifting me into his arms and walking us up the stairs.

“I could hold you ‘n listen to your voice all night long, love.”

. . . . .

“Oh my god!” Julia yells out, unravelling a long shawl from pristine white tissue paper. “Okay whoever got me, thank you so much!”

She continues to squeal a little as he wraps it over her shoulders and presses the end to her nose, inhaling the lavender scent of her favourite designer brand.

I’d only spent one Christmas with the whole group before but it was clear secret Santa was a bit of a tradition. Between the six of us we all had other friends, family and mostly, relationships. Organising a secret santa within our group just relieved some of the stress of present buying - and it was fun.

We’re all sitting around Harry’s living room, it felt the homiest to us after all. The kiddy advent calendar I bought for him hung by the fireplace reading December 21st. We’ve all finished our egg nogs, meaning it was officially present time. Over the next few days we’ll all be driving up and down the country to visit family, meaning today’s the last day most of us will be seeing each other. Harry had whined about me leaving, begging me to stay another day with him or better yet - spend christmas with his family up north.

It was when I told him my own parents were spending the holidays visiting my sister and her kids in New York that his campaign started. We kissed almost three months ago now and have been on a slew of dates since. Between all the secret dinners out, brunches and farmers market trips, we haven’t found time for the talk. We had no official title. I’ve heard Harry refer to me as “m’girl” a couple times when I’ve wandered into the kitchen and overheard him on the phone to mitch, but nothing he’s told me himself. Despite this, he still insists I have to come and spend christmas with him and his close family. The idea of me hanging out with my young cousins and distant relatives apparently doesn’t satisfy him.

“Are you serious!” Eleanor gasps as she unwraps her own present. Everyone had picked the perfect gifts for each other this year. In a pure coincidence, I ended up with Harry’s name after Nick made me trade because he’d already bought Julia’s present for her. I’ve been nervous about it all evening, I was sure he’d like it, a little too sure. That was the problem. One night, wrapped up in Harry’s bed, he’d recalled his latest tragedy to me: He’d taken shroom with Mitch on his last trip to LA and subsequently decided to skinny dip in the sea, losing his favourite mustard cords in the process. The only times we’ve seen everyone else has been with the both of us present and , to my knowledge, he hasn’t mentioned this to anyone else. The brown paper package that sat on the coffee table could invite a few more questions that I was prepared to answer.

“Harry, you’re next!” Ellie grinned, hugging her present to her chest.

Thanks to our early secrecy, there’s been no opportunity to tell our friends we were dating. Eleanor hasn’t stopped her constant questioning but we’ve kept up a pretty good front of excuses. It was still freezing out so it made sense for us both to climb into his car together at the end of the night. Nobody had to know we would be going home to the same house where we’d climb into the same heavenly bed and scramble eggs together in the morning.

“I’m going, I’m going!” Harry laughs as Ellie tries to hurry him up, playing perfectly into her role as the youngest in our group.

He pulls the first fold of paper back with his ringed fingers and immediately looks up at me as the mustard fabric shines up at him. He grins wide, beaming back at me before pulling the rest of the paper back and laying the trousers out in front of him.

“No babe...where did you find them?” He’s running his fingers down the cord, in awe to have his favorite trousers back - or at least a copy.

I don’t miss how Eleanor and Nick’s heads turn to share a look of shock as the pet name tumbles out. Before I can put anything together, Harry’s standing and leaning over the coffee table. He wraps his arms around my shoulders, pulling me into a hug and whispering his thanks in my ear.

“Wait I dont - how did you know it was h-” Julia pipes up, before she can finish she’s cut off by the joint gasps of Nick and Ellie as Harry plants a wet kiss to my cheek - then my lips, and laughs at our friends reaction.

“I knew it!” Ellie yells, pointing frantically between the two of us, Harry now having stepped over the table and come to sit next to me, pulling me into his side.

“What was-” Julia stammers, “Since when!”

Harry’s eyes flutter down to my face. He giggles quietly when he catches on to my glare. This wasn’t exactly how I’d imagined the evening going.

“Have you just been lying to my face for the past three months?” Ellie asks, crossing her arms over her chest and pouting her lips.

“Five,” Harry mumbles, almost just as an inside joke for the both of us to enjoy. I slap my hand against his shoulder to shut him up but the damage is already done.

“Five months!” Even Theo’s joining in now. “How didn’t we know?”

“It didn’t start out like this honestly, we would’ve told you.” I try and explain, eager for this to quiet down so we could get to the roast dinner waiting for us in the oven.

“How did it start?” Nick pokes, drawing Julia and Ellie’s attention as the same puzzled expressions adorn their faces.

“Unimportant,” Harry brushes off, standing up to tower over us all and reaching a hand back for my own. “We better get dinner, we wouldn't want burnt potatoes.”

Harry pulls on my arm gently, leading me out the room before anyone can object.

In the kitchen, he picks up a tea towel and starts to check on the food, prodding at the parsnips. I roll my eyes as he ties his lavender apron around his waist and tentatively pulls the potato tray from the oven.

“Harry..” I sigh, trying not to laugh as he turn to face me, spatula in hand.

“Yes dear?”

“What was that?”

“Oh - You’ve gotta shimmy a little spatula under the potatoes or they’ll break apart-”

“No, obviously not that,” He makes it so hard so stay stern, a giggle leaks out as he lifts a hand to rest on his hip. “Why did you do that?”

“I want them to know.” drops his utensils, tone sincere as he takes another step towards me. “I want our friends to know how much I love you already, and you remember about my mustard cords so..it felt like the perfect time.”

“What?” I stutter, looking up at him from where he’s pulled me into his chest. His hands rest on my waist, rings a little hold against my exposed skin.

“You remembered the trousers I lost last month in LA -”

“You love me?”

His eyes go a little wide, a smile peaking through as the sides of his mouth quirk upwards. Realising what he just said, he lifts a hand from my waist to rest it against my face and lean down a little.

“Of course I love you.” He whispers, his voice a little croaky and I can see tiny droplets gathering in his eyes that make my heart flutter.

“Love you too..” I mumble. I wipe a thumb over his cheek before pulling him down into a kiss. I feel his smile against my own, and everything’s perfect for just a second.

“So you’ll come to Christmas with me?”

. . . . .

Hiii I hate the ending :)

Tysm for reading !! pls leave a like or reblog (it rlly helps <3) if you enjoyed it x

#Harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #stellarboystyles3years #“I could just hold you and listen to your voice all night long.”#dani's masterlist #dani's writing #fan fic #harry styles #nick grimshaw #reader #idk #what do u even put in tags #christmas vibes?#friends to lovers

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pinnithin-writes · 4 years

Text

newfound information

I have a running theory that Goemon Ishikawa is legally blind and decided to write something about it. This is some of the gayest and most pointless shit I’ve ever written. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoyed writing it. 1778 words.

“I’d like to know,” Goemon said, “what color your eyes are.”

Thick silence wrapped the room like a blanket. The scratching of Lupin’s pen on a notepad stilled. For a while, the only sound was the tic tic tic of the radiator.

“Which one of us?” Jigen asked. The leather of the couch creaked as he leaned further back in his slouch.

Today marked a full week they’d been crowded together in a drafty apartment in Zürich - the morning had passed with Jigen smoking and Lupin planning and Goemon untangling the knots within him. The coffee table had been shoved aside to make room for a cluttered spread of maps and books on the floor. The heist was days away, and Lupin was audibly puzzling out their approach as he cross-referenced the recon notes his partners had put together.

Goemon wasn’t facing either of them; he had his forehead pressed against the window, eyes unfocused. The street below their hideout was a brick red blur. I’ve never seen Switzerland before, he’d commented upon their arrival, and Lupin had chuckled at his joke.

“Both.”

“Oh,” Lupin answered brightly. “They’re brown. I thought you knew.”

He did, in fact, know they were brown. Lupin and Jigen had both mentioned their eye color to him before. There were a lot of things about his partners’ appearances Goemon had pieced together over the few years they’d been working together.

It wasn't that he couldn’t see them at all. He just saw them at a distance that usually reduced them to a collection of colors and shapes. To Goemon, Lupin was a bell-tone laugh and a flash of bright red and a courteous hand on his elbow when he passed in the hall. Jigen was the smell of Marlboros and a longsuffering, gravelly sigh and the steady click of leather shoes on hardwood. They were whole, complete people to him already.

But lately he’d been hungering for details he wasn’t sure he could have. Certain things that required a proximity Goemon rarely permitted.

“What?” Jigen interjected suddenly. “They are not. They’re gray, right?”

A soft rustle as Lupin set his notepad aside. “Really, Jigen? How long have we known each other? You don’t know what color my eyes are?”

“They’re gray. I swear to god they’re gray.”

“It says ‘brown’ on my birth certificate!”

Goemon wordlessly listened to their argument as he turned away from the window. He leaned back on the sill in preoccupation, the cool glass chilling his neck. He should just ask. It beat staring at the street and dwelling on it for hours.

He ran his thumb in distracted circles against Zantetsuken’s sheath. “Can I see them?”

“Lupin’s birth papers? I’m not sure they’re legitimate,” Jigen said, ducking quickly to avoid the pen Lupin chucked at him. It clattered harmlessly behind the couch.

“No,” Goemon clarified sharply. “Your eyes.”

“Oh.”

A beat of silence passed, which Lupin broke first. “Well, sure you can,” he answered. “Then you can vouch for me.”

Goemon imagined he was shooting Jigen a barbed look as he said this. A stack of papers shifted as he unfolded his skinny legs and stood, and then Lupin was crossing the room toward him. Goemon felt his heart rate tick up - he hadn’t expected his odd request to be honored. Lupin’s visage grew clearer as he approached, until Goemon could easily clock his lopsided smile and tweaked eyebrows.

Lupin tucked his hands in his pockets and leaned in close. “What do you think?” he asked. “Brown or gray?”

“Hold still.”

Narrowing his eyes, Goemon raised a hand to grasp the other man’s chin, tilting his face this way and that. The light from the window fell softly on his cheeks and the slope of his nose. Lupin blinked expectantly. He was close enough that Goemon could see his Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

Gray was his first impression. Silver, really, like a pair of shiny round coins. Lupin’s gaze was restless, darting back and forth between Goemon’s own eyes as he allowed himself to be examined. His skin was startlingly soft.

“Hold still,” he ordered again, tugging Lupin closer.

This time, Lupin obeyed, fixating on a single point and staying there. His previously cheeky grin disappeared when his jaw went slack, and Goemon felt a tiny puff of air as Lupin exhaled.

He could see now that his irises were also flecked with shades of brown, ringing his pupils in a lovely starburst. Goemon studied Lupin’s eyes a moment longer, taking note of how they settled from ink to fawn to ash from the center out, committing the image to memory. He observed his facial structure - how it was soft and sharp all at once, unique and conspicuous. Lupin’s fondness for disguise made more sense to him now.

Goemon was sure the man could hear his pulse thudding in his neck at this point, so he finally released him. “Both,” he said conclusively. “Probably varies with the light.”

Lupin was slow to step away, cheeks rosy. “Oh,” he managed to say. “So… we were both right.”

“Indeed.”

Jigen was uncharacteristically quiet from where he watched on the couch. Goemon heard him tap ash idly from his cigarette before taking a contemplative drag. “Sounds like a cop out to me,” he murmured as an afterthought.

Goemon slanted him a glance. “You could see for yourself,” he challenged, brows raised.

“I’ve seen ‘em already,” he grumbled.

Lupin took another step back, melting out of focus to his usual blur of black and red, and folded his arms. “Jigen, dear, I believe it’s your turn.”

Jigen coughed. “Excuse me?”

“You're up next. Let the man see your eyes.”

Sensing his hesitance, Goemon’s mouth softened from its steady set line. “Only if you want-”

“No,” Jigen was already interrupting him. “I’ll do it.”

The couch protested as he leaned to set his cigarette in the ashtray, elongating into a dark capital I when he stretched and stood. The approaching tap of his shoes was slow and familiar.

“No need to look so nervous,” Lupin teased, leaning impishly into Jigen’s personal space as he pulled to a stop.

Goemon prodded Lupin out of the way with the sheathed end of his sword, resting it against his sternum in a silent warning. Lupin retreated, smirking, while Jigen drew in an almost imperceptible breath and let it out slow. The same technique he used before pulling the trigger on an impossible shot. Goemon reached to remove his fedora with as much care as he could, pressing it delicately against his chest.

“Hold this, please.”

Jigen nodded. The tips of his fingers trembled where they touched the felt.

“His eyes are definitely gray,” Lupin commented, angling his chin at Jigen. “Oh my god, are you shaking?”

Goemon gave Lupin a pointed tap with Zantetsuken in lieu of reprimand. He fell silent.

Out of respect for his trepidation, Goemon was gentler with how he handled Jigen’s face, nudging his jaw one way and then the other with the backs of his knuckles. Stubble prickled his skin. He was struck by how sharp his cheekbones were at this distance; he had never really noticed their prominence before. He was certain they’d draw blood if he ran his thumb against them.

Jigen’s eyes were significantly darker than Lupin’s. Storm clouds gathered around his pupils, shades of slate and black bleeding into one another. Instead of meeting Goemon’s stare, he determinedly stuck his gaze at an indiscriminate point somewhere past his left ear. These were marksman’s eyes, sharp and steady and missing nothing. Shame he hid them under his hat all the time.

Goemon dropped his hand from Jigen’s face. “They are gray,” he agreed.

The swiftness with which Jigen stepped back and replaced his headwear was possibly the fastest he’d ever seen him move. He cleared his throat, adjusting the hat’s brim. “Great. Glad we worked that out.”

Lupin jabbed him with an elbow. “Congrats on surviving the ordeal.”

Jigen grumbled something indistinct, tipping his chin and hiding his eyes further.

Goemon kept his expression carefully neutral. Now that he possessed this newfound information, he wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. He had learned quite a bit more about the others than intended; not only about their appearance, but their mannerisms, as well. Their relationship with closeness. He didn’t know there was a way to turn off Lupin’s motor mouth. He didn’t know Jigen became so mystified when touched.

These were things he would file away for later, additional pieces for the frustrating jigsaw that was his feelings.

“Thank you,” he uttered finally.

“No problem,” Jigen responded at the same time Lupin said, “That’s what we’re here for.”

Goemon scoffed with disbelief. “Is it?”

Lupin paused and moved out of the way to allow Jigen passage. Goemon caught a whiff of smoke - he must’ve resumed his previous task of mangling the cigarette he’d been working on. Lupin leaned easily against the window beside Goemon, not as close as before but close enough he could tell the master thief was examining him. Embarrassment creeping into the back of his neck, Goemon lifted a prompting eyebrow in his direction.

“Sure it is,” Lupin went on. “I ask you two for weird favors all the time. It’s only fair.”

“Hm.” Goemon was skeptical.

“We’re a team,” he insisted. “It’s good for a team to know each other really well. Right?”

“...Right.”

“Useful for recognizing each other in disguise.”

Grateful for Lupin’s valiant effort to spare his dignity, Goemon allowed a small smile. “Sure.”

Lupin grinned back, tilting his head to the side until his temple touched the windowpane. “I’d never really looked at your eyes this close before, either,” he admitted, some of the bravado leaving his voice. “They’re really… intense. Super dark.”

“Pretty,” Jigen added around the cigarette in his mouth.

“Pretty,” Goemon echoed, caught off guard by the compliment.

“Pretty scary,” he clarified hastily, and Goemon couldn’t hold back a soft laugh.

Silence settled on the group, introspective rather than discomfited. Goemon’s heart rate was beginning to return to normal. The atmosphere in the room had shifted into something thick and unnameable, and he was definitely responsible for the change, but it didn’t feel bad. Just new. Unfamiliar. And while Goemon was out of his depth, it was reassuring to know the others were just as bad at navigating this as he was.

“So,” Lupin clapped his hands together emphatically. “That was a nice break. Let’s get back to business, shall we?” He swept a gesture at the paper nightmare on the floor.

The team murmured their assent, but not much else was accomplished that day.

#lupin iii #lupin the third #goemon ishikawa #goemon ishikawa xiii #daisuke jigen #what the hell even is this ship name #lupin goemon and jigen are triple married fight me #ink #fanfiction #writing #takes place in an indiscriminate time early on in their relationship

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fanimesenseiwrites · 4 years

Text

Model Mammon!

I got the inspiration for this story from a couple of daily chats in game. I'm a sucker for loving Mammon so it features my personal genderfluid MC.

Hoshiko (the MC) got Asmo to get them a copy of the latest Devil Style.

What happens when Mammon finds them fawning over the front cover?

Hoshiko walked out of Asmodeus's room holding the latest copy of Devil Style and admiring the cover. They hummed happily to themself.

"Hey Hoshiko!" Mammon yelled at them from where he was standing right in front of the door to his room.

Hoshiko's head snapped to him and they briefly froze before quickly shoving the magazine under their shirt. "Hey," was their weak reply.

"What's that you got there?" He asked as he started to walk over to them.

"Oh it's just-" and then Hoshiko suddenly bolted.

"What?! Hey why are you running?!" Mammon called as he ran after them.

Hoshiko didn't respond and just ran downstairs, trying to get to their room before Mammon could catch them.

Mammon slid down the banister to catch up to them. "You can't get away from me!"

Hoshiko looked back at him in horror.

Mammon jumped off at the end of the banister and grabbed Hoshiko, keeping them still. "What do you have? Why did you run away?"

"I won't tell you!" Hoshiko yelled at him while they squirmed.

"Then I'll just take it!" He reached under their shirt and grabbed the magazine, pulling it out and stepping away from them to really look at it.

Hoshiko gasped. "Mammon!"

Mammon just stared at the magazine. "It's..."

Hoshiko took advantage of his stunned state and snatched the magazine away from him before running away again.

"Hey!" Mammon yelled before he took off after them again.

Hoshiko ran to their room and closed the door but wasn't able to lock it before Mammon was trying to force his way in.

"Hoshiko! Lemme in!"

"No!" They were desperately trying to close the door back.

"Why not?!"

"Cuz you're going to be all smug and make fun of me!"

"No I'm not! I just... I wanna watch you while you read the article..." Mammon stopped trying to force his way in.

Hoshiko was quiet. They stopped trying to push him out but they didn't let him in either.

"Why?"

"Because I wanna see what you think."

Hoshiko peeked through the crack in the door at him. "And you're not going to make fun of me?"

"No."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"You swear?"

"Ain't that the same thing?"

"Say it."

He sighed. "I swear I won't make fun of you."

Hoshiko moved out of the way and opened the door to let him in.

Mammon grinned and walked in.

Hoshiko closed the door behind him then took the magazine and sat down on the bed with it.

"So..." Mammon started.

Hoshiko looked at him.

"Did you get your own copy of the magazine or is that Asmo's?"

"I asked Asmo to buy me a copy. I don't like going into town alone."

Mammon nodded. "That's probably for the best."

"... are you really gonna sit here and watch me read the article about you?"

"Yeah!" He toed off his shoes and sat criss-cross on the bed.

Hoshiko shook their head and leaned back against the headboard. They admired the cover briefly before turning straight to the article with Mammon's interview.

Mammon watched their every expression.

Hoshiko smiled and grinned at most of it, and blushed at some of it.

"What part are you reading?" Mammon asked when he noticed them blushing.

They looked at him. "You're just really... sincere in the interview. I like seeing this soft side of you."

"Soft?"

"Yeah. Like sweet and gentle."

"You like all that?"

"I love that. I wanna see who a person is when they're not around the public, when they feel comfortable... apparently you're really comfortable modeling."

Mammon blushed. "Hoshiko... I..." he looked away from them.

"What is it?" Hoshiko leaned closer to him.

"It's actually... ugh... nevermind."

Hoshiko frowned. "You know, you can tell me anything."

He looked at them.

They blushed as they grinned at him. "By the way, you look really good in these photos."

He grinned back. "Ya think so?"

"Yeah, you look all sweet and soft."

He nodded. "Ya know... whenever I model, I always imagine that you're there..."

"Me?" Hoshiko sounded surprised.

Mammon blushed and looked away from them. "Yeah... I just imagine that you're laying next to me or that we're cuddling or you're just there, being all encouraging and I totally relax."

Hoshiko set the magazine on the bedside table. "But... you don't act all relaxed and chill when you're actually hanging out with me."

Mammon groaned and looked at them. "Why're you getting on my case about it?"

"I'm not getting on your case, I promise. I'm just confused. You said you think about me and it makes you relaxed but then when we're together you seem so high strung. Sometimes like you're stressed but mostly you're just full of energy. I'd love to see you all relaxed if I'm honest."

Mammon's shoulders slumped. "I want to be but then I get around you and I get nervous."

Hoshiko frowned. "I make you nervous? Did I do something wrong?"

"No! You're only ever nice to me. You're fucking perfect and I just... fuck..."

"So... should I be less "perfect" to make you less nervous?"

"No! Never! Don't you ever change a single thing about you."

"I'm really confused now..." Hoshiko held their face in their hands.

Mammon groaned and stood up. "I love you, okay?! Like, really love you! And it makes me nervous as hell because I want you to love me back! There! Are you happy?!"

Hoshiko just stared at him, stunned silent.

"Fuck! Now I've ruined it..." Mammon headed toward the door.

"No wait!" Hoshiko jumped up from the bed and ran over and grabbed his hand.

Mammon squeezed their hand but didn't look at them. "Now it's my turn to ask you not to make fun of me."

"I would never make fun of you over something like this..."

"Of course, you're going to let me down easy which is gonna be way worse."

"Mammon, please look at me."

He sighed and turned to look at them, he put on a smile but it was totally fake. "... don't worry about me. I'm the great-"

Hoshiko cut him off by pulling his face down so that they could kiss him.

Mammon was shocked at first but then kissed back.

Hoshiko pulled away to look at him. "I love you too."

"Oh thank the demon king!" He wrapped his arms around them and kissed them hard.

Hoshiko laughed and kissed back, but pulled away again to take off his sunglasses. "I don't know why you wear these things all the time..."

"Because they're cool, duh."

"I'd rather see your beautiful blue eyes. I think they're stunning... like sapphires."

Mammon blushed. "Oh, uh... I'll keep that in mind..." he glanced away from them.

Hoshiko kissed his cheek and went to sit back on the bed.

"So..." Mammon started as he walked over and sat down next to them.

Hoshiko looked at him. "You just figured out that I love you, what are you going to do next?" They asked with a teasing grin.

"I definitely wanna kiss you again."

Hoshiko grinned and climbed into his lap. "I like that idea."

He grinned wide before kissing them again.

Hoshiko kissed back and ran their hands into his hair.

He wrapped his arms around them and held them tightly. He gradually gripped them tighter and tighter.

Hoshiko pulled away to look at him once they got uncomfortable. "What's wrong?"

"Huh?"

"You're squeezing me so hard, it kinda hurts."

"Oh! Sorry..." he let go and settled for resting his hands on their hips.

"Is something wrong?"

"Yeah... I'm afraid that this is all a dream and I'll wake up any minute now."

Hoshiko frowned. "What can I do to let you know this isn't a dream?"

He shrugged.

Hoshiko kissed him again.

He kissed back.

Hoshiko bit his lip.

He gasped softly.

"Did that hurt?" Hoshiko asked.

"A little... I liked it though."

They grinned. "Well if it hurt then that means you're not in a dream, right?"

He looked at them. "That's not... is that how that works?"

Hoshiko rolled their eyes. "How about we just savor the moment?"

He grinned. "Yeah, okay."

Hoshiko smiled softly and continued loving on Mammon, giving him as much praise and reassurance as he needed.

#I love Mammon so much #he deserves so much love #obey me shall we date #obey me #obey me fanfic #my work #my obey me mc #obey me mc #mammon x mc #obey me Mammon #Mammon #mammon fanfic #Hoshiko Higure

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indianamoonshine · 4 years

Text

siberu | reader x din djarin

summary: reader is not human, but a force-senstive humanoid, who is searching for a legendary sickle in the caverns of an arctic planet named siberus. she stumbles across a lonely, very lost, and very cold din djarin in the snow. they discuss the strange little creature in din’s bag.

mentions: cursing. mention of the youngling situation during order 66. gender is a construct. reader is absolutely fawning over how cute grogu is.

note: just two people repressing obvious feelings. this was a request so i hope @tolkienblackgirl approves! i’m sorry it was literally months before i got to it. it’s not a super happy ending and a little angsty which is very unlike me. i really wish i could’ve done more with this, but i have three other fics on my hands at the moment so i had to make it a one-shot.

rating: m just in case.

it was way too fucking cold here.

you didn’t care for siberus just by the briefing alone, but when your ship lands upon the frozen terrain, you teeth immediately clench. snow falls around you in flurries, the wind spiraling them into a weak tornado at your booted feet as soon as your ramp tumbles noisily upon the ground. the air was heavy with frost and it showed each time you drew breath, the vapor chilling immediately in the polar atmosphere.

you tug your shawl tighter around you - a piece of fabric that you realized very quickly wouldn’t do much against the bite of the tundra. you thought you were ready for the weather - thought you were prepared for the manner of dress required for siberus, but the reputation of the ice world had proceeded even the nastiest of rumors. no one dared tread upon siberus ground - not in years, anyway.

but that wasn’t just because of its climate.

siberus was one of the planets utterly destroyed by “the great purge”. a distressing lack of life forms shown on your radar as you scan the horizon, save for the exceptionally evolved animals that could withstand the tundra. as soon as you landed, they’d immediately scattered across the snow and fled to their holes in the ground. you didn’t blame them; for as long as they’d been isolated, the idea of an intruder must’ve been beyond terrifying.

the council told you it was here. somewhere, in these thousands of kilometers of snow and ice, is the last jedi sickle.

a powerful weapon...but you argued that it was hardly warranted a visit to hoth’s much crueler and unforgiving sibling. hells, the empire hadn’t even dared visit. maybe they might have had they known the sickle was secured in carbonite. maybe they’d gone out of their way if that piece of information managed to trickle through their grapevine, but even then, was it worth their time? you weren’t even convinced it was.

it was described as “the poor man’s dark saber”. while the sickle was nearly impossible to destroy, it wouldn’t peel through anything like the dark saber could. no. the dark saber was somewhat of a mythical thing. the sickle, however, felt more convincing.

and for whatever reason, they had entrusted you to retrieve it.

they were the council of augusten, your home planet, blackened by night at all times. a symbiotic relationship with a bio-luminescent plant was, essentially, your sun - your star. this resulted in a tolerable, but irritating, daytime blindness of its natives peoples and creatures. and while siberus wasn’t exactly bright this time of day (especially with such a raging storm concealing your view), it was enough to make the vessels thrum tensely behind your eyes.

you’re one of the last! they said triumphantly, as though to sweeten you up. a survivor of the order! it is your duty!

bullshit.

it wasn’t such a strange idea that the council wanted the sickle. it wasn’t, by any means, quite like the mandalore legend of the dark saber. but it wasn’t just the power wielding the weapon itself brought - it was the kyber crystal within it.

it could power thousands of machines and harness energy for millions of resources. honestly, you hadn’t even considered the worthiness of kyber crystals for anything other than constructing lightsabers, but it made sense. enough sense that you felt obligated to fetch it from this frozen wasteland.

you talked a big talk about being able to find it. hells! you almost convinced yourself it’d be a piece of cake by the way you spoke with such confidence and bullshit conviction at the briefing. but looking out upon the snow-laden horizon - mountains and all - you suddenly weren’t so sure of yourself.

pride, as always, comes before the fall. as usual.

you even considered going back. there wasn’t a handbook for finding ancient, priceless, jedi artifacts. there wasn’t a tracking beacon for it either and your abilities could only do so much. you prayed to the force that, if anything, your connection as a jedi might be enough to conjure it from hiding. and, of course, that proved fruitless within the first half-hour.

you’re about to collapse. it wasn’t the night that shrouded you that almost did it; the darkness was your home - your element. you vision (very literally) fared much better in the blackness. the cold, on the other hand, was licking at your bones and causing you to tremble beneath your own weight.

it’s when you’re on the verge of making camp that you spot a figure upon the horizon.

not just any figure.

a person.

there’s a surge of motivation to keep moving. (strange, how that works...) whoever it is isn’t very far away - not even four kilometers. and if they’re searching for transportation it clearly isn’t in reach. they move at a slow pace, forcing themselves to walk against the bite of siberus’s gale.

when you’re in reach of this mysterious being, you yell out in haste. “hey! you!”

the figure stops their fight with the current of snow. they’re knee-deep in the tundra - you’re waist deep, really. and when you squint through the particles of snow, blinking rapidly to melt it away, you notice the shine of...

beskar.

“a mandalorian?!” you shout.

you shuffle closer as they remain still as stone. if they truly were a mandalorian, they’d certainly be on their guard - certainly moving for a blaster at their hip. you’re able to see their helmet’s face pierced upon yours as you step closer. how they managed to hear you, you couldn’t be sure, but it was a welcome surprise all the same.

you wrap your shawl closer around you, protecting your cheeks against the sting of cold. you observe the mandalorian (or what you expected to be the mandalorian) in their steely armor as they consider you for what felt like minutes. (too long in this damn climate.) siberus’s two moons allow the beskar to glint when the shoulder pauldrons move just right, a beam of light reflecting into your sensitive eyes. you hiss as a result.

“what is it you want?” the mandalorian demands, body now angling towards you. they’ve obviously come to the conclusion you’re of no immediate danger.

you narrow your eyes as the wind picks up, flakes of snow blurring this person until they’re just a speck against a backdrop. you don’t even consider your next words - you’ve always been too trusting. but something in this mandalorian’s spirit told you that they were harmless. in fact, they could prove valuable to this mission.

anything to get you off this frozen rock as quickly as possible.

“come to my ship! it’s warm!” you toss your head in the direction of where you came.

the mandalorian is taken aback. they recoil, physically, on the balls of their feet. who in their right kriffin’ mind would invite a mandalorian to stay in the privacy of their own ship? especially on such a deserted planet?

still, the mandalorian shouts over the wind. “why should i trust you?!”

there’s really nothing to do but shrug. “because we’re both about to freeze to death!” you point to their beskar that is, while impenetrable, starting to collect icicles. no, nothing could break beskar, but the mandalorian inside it could freeze.

this is enough to convince the mandalorian.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

you’ve made two cups of java by the time the mandalorian finally un-clenches his fists.

it’s a him. he told you by the way he moved - how his shoulders barely fit through the limited width of your ship’s entrance or how his voice rung beneath his helmet. still, gender didn’t really fit in your culture. gender wasn’t worthy enough to be considered important so you were hesitant of calling them either or.

it was when you kept dancing around the pronouns that he finally uttered, “i’m a male.”

you raise a brow, pouring the steaming java into a ceramic mug that had chips and stains on the sides of it. (the handle on yours broke after an upsetting landing from last mission. handles were hard to come by in this galaxy. a luxury, even.)

“oh?” you ask.

the mandalorian grunts, barely slipping his helmet past his lips to drink. you knew all about their creed so it came as no surprise when he immediately pulled it back down his chin.

“i know you’re augustenian. i’m aware of how your people feel about identity.” he pauses, lifting his head to watch your reaction. “male is fine. he is fine.”

it was kind - not blunt - the way this came from his lips. you allow a gentle smile to tug at the corner of your lips. “you knew from the markings, right?” you ask, motioning to the upside down crescent upon your forehead; it glowed a faint green in the darkness.

he nods a little. it’s hard to speak to someone when you’re unable to look into their eyes. you depended on the expressions of beings and it felt impersonal to speak to him now because of it. still, you weren’t one to question creed or faith.

“it’s hard to miss,” he replies, bringing his cup to the side of his body, and shifting between his cloak.

you raise a brow. “what are you doing?”

the mandalorian stills, aware that it may look strange if not explained. “i, uh...” he takes a deep breath and pulls a woven strap from his shoulder; a large, lumpy thing, that moves when he situates it. it even makes a coo’ing noise.

“did you manage to catch some wildlife?” you ask, amazed. you tilt your head, reaching a hand out to pull back the flap of the bag.

but the mandalorian grabs your hand in a brisk movement, clenching hard around your wrist. “don’t. he’s...” he sighs. “he’s a little jumpy.”

you furrow your brows. he knew the mannerism of this creature personally? it must’ve been a traveling companion you’d failed to notice. you pull away and nod, waiting for him to reveal whatever this thing was.

when a pair of long, green, and fuzzy ears pop out from beneath the bag’s opening, you shriek in delight. the little creature stares back at you, large black eyes rounded in the moonlight, and a curious smile beaming upon his kind face when he understands you are of no danger.

“what a precious little thing!” you coo. you reach out for him, fingers twiddling in anticipation. “may i?”

the mandalorian fixates his stare more heavily upon you. with a protective gruff he says, “if you try anything with him...”

you shake your head, bouncing a little restlessly in your seat. “i wouldn’t ever hurt a child.”

for some reason he seems to believe you but still hands you the baby with caution. when the creature’s little hands wrap themselves around you, a jolt of bliss surges through your body. you’ve always adored children and this really was a youngling.

but...he was more than that.

your smile fades slowly from your mien as you stare into his eyes, watching something unfold that the mandalorian before you can’t see. he’s sensitive like you. force sensitive. you can feel the way that the energy beats around him - like a dance - but weakening with every moment.

and then there’s an image.

an image you wished you’d never see.

younglings sprawled upon the jedi temple floor, their bodies mangled and bloodied from vicious crime. you find yourself turning away from his penetrating stare, brows furrowed in pain, when a collective scream of terror ricochets from a place very far in the past.

you weren’t there to see it in person. just in stories. as a survivor, the guilt haunted you at night. this was certainly...overwhelming.

“where did you find this child?” you find yourself asking, words barely audible through chapped lips. you didn’t even realize you were saying it until after it was done.

the mandalorian is quick to reply. “there was a bounty on his life. the empire - well, whoever they are now - wanted him.”

you find yourself gripping the child to your chest in possessiveness. “no. you can’t,” you gasp. “they’ll kill him.”

the mandalorian raises a hand to you in a show of sympathy. “i know. i didn’t give him to them.” he pauses, watching as you cradle the child in your arms and petting his long ears with tears in your eyes. “are you...”

you raise your head to watch him, anxious as to your next move. but you sputter out the truth like it was poison - like you couldn’t hold it in anymore. “a jedi,” you confirm. “yes. or...i was.”

the mandalorian is taken aback but the news registers him into silence. he observes the way you press the little one to your cheek and give him a small kiss near his eye. he smiles - albiet, sadly - beneath his helmet when the kid nuzzles against you in a show of affection, little claws wrapping themselves around your forefinger as though his life depended on it.

”i...” he hesitates, and then sighs. “i was quested to bring him back to his own kind. your kind.”

you’re aware of what he wants...what he’s trying to say.

“no.” you answer. “i can’t train him. i won’t.”

the mandalorian goes silent. through clenched teeth he asks, “why not?”

you look into the child’s face. he hasn’t spoken to you - not in the way jedi are able - but he’s given you an insight to his relationship with this man. and his fear was palpable - thick.

he was closing himself off. he was unstable.

you rub the child’s ears once more, finger and thumb warming the skin. “he’s cut himself off from the force. i don’t have the influence on him that is necessary to change his heart.” you sigh, placing the child in the mando’s arms. “i’m sorry.”

the mandalorian looks down at the child in his embrace as he snuggles against his chilled beskar without protest. “what can i do?”

you sigh, rubbing circles into your temple. what could he do? you had barely passed the trials by the time order 66 was executed. and most jedi were killed during the great purge. you were one of the very last - one of those the empire had not successfully tracked down.

but you were no master.

“there is a jedi...” you whisper. you wring your hands together in apprehension. “i’ve never met her. she’s called ahsoka tano. there are rumors she lives.”

the mandalorian is quick to respond. “how do i find her?”

“i don’t know,” you tell him truthfully. “her survival isn’t confirmed.”

the mandalorian grumbles under his breath. “dank farrik.” he sets the child back into his sling and tucks him to his side again.

you watch as the two of them stare at one another, both desperate for answers you weren’t able to give them. they seem to have endured a long journey - long enough that they’ve formed a bond you’ve never seen between a mandalorian and another living creature.

you sigh. “i’m sorry i can’t do more,” you tell him. “but at least stay and rest. you look as though you need it.”

he watches you between the slits of his visor and it’s unsettling that you don’t know the color of his eyes. that feels important to know about a person. he wasn’t a machine - he was a man - and he should be regarded as such.

it takes a moment for him to process the invitation. surely he didn’t get very many of those. while that wasn’t surprising it was still very upsetting; more upsetting than you’d expected, anyway.

you offer him your bed but he denies and tells you he’ll sleep on the floor. if you’d like to share with the child i’d be more than grateful, he tells you. you knew it was an honor to be trusted with this child’s life, so you accept.

in the morning, the storm has passed, and the child still lay in your arms after a night of peaceful sleep. you feel the mandalorian - whose name you never got - strategically remove the child from your limbs.

and just when he’s about to leave - he hesitates. you can hear his footfalls stop short of the exit as you pretend to still sleep for whatever reason. maybe you were afraid to look upon him again - that you’d find yourself slipping into a feeling you weren’t allowed to humor.

so you remain still.

you remain still even as the mandalorian wipes a strand of hair from your eyes, takes a deep breath, and allows the child to snuggle his nose against yours. he coos just slightly - a little goodbye - and it causes your stomach to drop to your knees.

you consider waking; to tell them you’d help find ahsoka, to say fuck it to whatever jedi order didn’t exist anymore and entertain whatever butterflies had tickled your insides when the mandalorian’s caress embraced your skin.

but when you open your eyes, they’ve gone.

⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ:⠀ *⋆.*:･ﾟ .: ⋆*･ﾟ: .⋆

NOTE: i’m so sorry this wasn’t what i originally envisioned but i still like it! also, i’d like to go ahead and say - in case i didn’t make it clear enough - that mando asked for the child to sleep with reader because it would’ve been super uncomfortable for him to sleep on the floor.

#request #the mandolorian x reader #mando x reader #i'm disapointed in this but also not surprised #SORRY #IN #ADVANCE #mw1

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twstarchives · 4 years

Text

Cater Diamond・Voice Lines

Additional Voice Lines: Beans Camo Event Card

School Uniform - R

Unlock Card “Wanna know some tips for having a fun life at school? I got you covered!”

Groovy “You gotta be full of energy when you’re with everyone ♪”

Home Setting “I kinda like the standard outfit.”

Home Transitions “Mm! The first-years’ uniforms always look so shiny and new.”

“Riddle’s calling for me. Wanna come with me?”

“Wait, are you free? Same here! So, anyway~ Do you have any Magicammable news to spill?”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Were you sad that you weren’t able to see Cay? ...Ahaha! I knew it. You’re so honest, Prefect~”

Home Taps “Our schools uniforms have a nice balance to them~ They’re not extra like our dorm uniforms, but they’re not too casual either.”

“Okay, pose! ...Aw, man! It came out blurry. Can I take one more? I want to post it on Magicam.”

“Huh? You think I look cool in my uniform? Ehh~! Where’s this coming from? You’re making me smile ♪”

“Sometimes it’s hard to tell what you’re thinking all the time, Prefect. ...Me? Aren’t I super easy to read~?”

“Hey, you know... you didn’t forget that I’m your senior, did you? JK! ♪ I probably shouldn’t ever do that to Riddle.”

PE Uniform - R

Unlock Card “Glistening sweat! Surging with youth! ...I’m kinda meh about these kinds of things.”

Groovy “I’m always down for an aesthetic-looking sport! ♪ Play with me, Prefect!”

Home Setting “Alright, our PE uniform!”

Home Transitions “I’ve got things to do too, you know! Huh? ‘Like what?’ Like... looking for stuff to post on Magicam!”

“Prefect, your collar, your collar! I saw Riddle nearby, so maybe you should hurry up and fix that.”

“Coach Vargas’s classes are so exhausting, aren’t they? I get it; I felt that way when I was a first-year too.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “You can find a lot of different ways to wear our PE uniforms. Hmm~ The way you wear yours is nice!”

Home Taps “You don’t need to force yourself to use honorifics with me. I don’t really mind things like that. Plus it’s easier that way, right?”

“What is it? What is it? You’re worried about something? I could never turn my back on my cute little junior if they’re in need~”

“Have you gotten used to life at this school yet? It’s really interesting with all the weird people here. Kinda feels like a gold mine of things to use for Magicam ♪”

“Athletics...? I’m not bad at them, but I don’t know how anyone could get so pumped up about them.”

“Wait, is this a popular game right now? Don’t tell me I’m late on the bandwagon!?”

Lab Coat - SR

Unlock Card “Even studying can be a blast when it looks fun and photogenic!”

Groovy “Let’s take things nice and slow! You’ll burn yourself out if you’re only ever working too hard.”

Home Setting “Alright, let’s get to work!”

Home Transitions “Hehe, do you need your senior’s advice on something? Okay, okay, relax and talk it out with me ♪”

“‘What am I usually doing?’ Mm, that’s a secret. No, I’m not free all the time! Cay is very, very busy!”

“What’re you doing today? If you’re free, then let me invite you on Cay’s Tour for Collecting Stuff for Magicam ♪”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “There’s someone better suited to help you with your work if that’s what you need. How about you go see Trey?”

Home Transition (Groovy) “So? I look a lot more serious than usual, don’t I? Ehh~! What’s with that reaction!? I’ll have to show you my actual serious side sometime.”

Home Taps “You seem to have a lot of time on your hands, Prefect. Are you all ready for class?”

“Looking aesthetic for Magicam is important. They say that having things you’re mindful of makes your everyday life a lot fuller!”

“Dedication is not a bad thing, but you need to give yourself a break sometimes too. See? Look how relaxed Grim is...”

“Prefect, you should focus only on the important things for your future~ Just like I do ♪”

“What? What? Are you homesick? I don’t think I can really relate to that~...”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Everyday has been so exciting ever since you came here. It never gets boring.”

Ceremony Robes - SR

Unlock Card “I like to try looking sharp every once in a while ♪ What do you think? Personally, I think it fits!”

Groovy “Our special ceremony robes! Let’s take a pic together to commemorate ♪”

Home Setting “How do I look? Handsome?”

Home Transitions “Are you interested in my robes? Wanna take a pic?”

“Does this look good on me? Sometimes looking formal like this is nice, don’t you think?”

“Hey, nice work today ♪ You can chill out for a little bit now~ I’m taking some downtime myself.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “What? Something happened again? Things are always so busy around you, Prefect~”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Your belt’s a little out of place. Alright, there you go. These are our special ceremony robes, so make sure you keep them looking picture-perfect, ‘kay?”

Home Taps “Man, our ceremony robes seriously are so cool~ When the whole school is lined up wearing them, it feels super powerful!”

“Our robes look the best at nighttime, but trying to get the right lighting when I’m taking pictures of them is seriously the worst...”

“What? What? You wanna know more about me? Mm, what should I say~?”

“Let’s talk about all kinds of things! You look like you’re full of interesting things I could post about.”

“I know. I know you want so desperately for Cay to fawn over you. But could you calm down just a little?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Alright, you’ve got some new problem to solve, right? Well, even if you don’t, I’ll come with you anyway. ‘Cause it sounds like fun ♪”

Dorm Uniform - SSR

Unlock Card “You have to have fun with croquet and Unbirthday parties ♪”

“Everything’s alright now, ‘cause I’m here! Just kidding ♪”

Groovy “Do you want to see Cay’s serious side? Okay, if you insist!”

Home Setting “Our dorm uniforms really do fit the best.”

Home Transitions “Don’t get me involved in any trouble... Well, there’s not really any point in me saying that. You’re so hopeless, Prefect~”

“You called for me again? Hehe, I bet you often get comments about how curious you are~”

“Trey’s desserts are so Magicammable~ And they’re super delicious! Wanna come with me to go eat some, Prefect?”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Let’s make a memory of today—do a peace sign! ☆ Hehe, that was a nice shot! Okay, what tags should I use?”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Do you wanna secretly try on our dorm uniforms sometime? They might actually look good on you~”

Home Taps “Have you seen Heartslabyul’s lounge yet? You really can’t find decorations with an aesthetic like that anywhere else.”

“If you want to look fire in our dorm uniforms, you gotta know the latest trends! Maybe come shopping with me next time?”

“Have you ever noticed that the playing card pins on the left sides of our chests have a different design for each person? Tiny details like that are so cool ♪”

“Aren’t you homesick or anything? Hm? Me? I’m... not. I’ve got some unreasonable older sisters...”

“It’s nice you feel so comfortable around me... but don’t tell me you’re trying to bring down Cay’s dignity?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “It would’ve been so much fun if you were in Heartslabyul with us, Prefect. Well, there’s no point in talking about things that’ll never happen ♪”

Duo Magic Cater: “Trey, you ready~?” Trey: “Got it, Cater! Count on me to back you up!”

Birthday Celebration Outfit - SSR

This card was only obtainable during Cater’s birthday event (Feb 3 - Feb 9, 2021).

Login on Birthday “You remembered my birthday? Thanks! You’re so nice for coming to celebrate. I’m super happy, so let’s post on Magicam ♪ Okay, look this way~!”

Unlock Card “Wow! This is getting a super ton of views on Magicam! ☆ Birthday parties rake in so much attention!”

“‘Happy birthday’ is such a nice phrase~ It feels like the ones celebrating and the one being celebrated can both be happy, doesn’t it?”

Groovy “Okay, grab your glasses... Cheers~! Thanks for making my birthday so much fun ♪”

Home Setting “Wearing this outfit makes it really feel like it’s someone’s birthday~”

Home Transitions “Astrology’s my best subject! But I won’t do my own birthday fortune reading... ‘Cause it’s so much more exciting not knowing your future! ♪”

“Is the toothbrush Trey gave me his way of saying to take care of my fang tooth? Well, it is one of my charm points! ☆”

“We have lots of rules in our dorm, but it’s my birthday, so it’s okay if I break some! ...Probably not... Yeah... Boohoo.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “It feels so exciting with everyone celebrating! I think I’ll use my Unique Magic and make some clones to show off around the school.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “Just between you and me, keeping up a smile for the entirety of the party gets kind of tiring... Just kidding!”

Home Taps “Idia gave me Magicam stickers as a present! I don’t know what anime they’re from, but I’m happy! ♪”

“Maybe Vil would follow my Magicam if I asked for that instead of a birthday present~”

“I got a skateboard from Kalim. ☆ He said he’s pretty good at skateboarding too, so next time we’ll go do it together!”

“My dorm made me a bright red, diamond-shaped quiche! It was filled with habaneros. I love super spicy foods so it was perfect ♪”

“My rosette was crooked? Thanks for fixing it~!”

Home Tap (Groovy) “I kinda wanna make some noise! How about you, Prefect? Wanna sing together? Or we could dance?”

Duo Magic Cater: “Lilia-kins, let’s take a pic for the birthday memories!” Lilia: “Cater, a happy birthday to you!”

Tutorial “Let’s have fun together, ‘kay?”

Lv Up “Yay~ I’m getting stronger!”

“‘#BetterThanEverCay’ kind of energy!”

“Let’s keep doing our best from now on!”

Max Lv Up “I always thought anything goes as long as I’m having some kind of fun, but I actually like getting serious every once in a while. Plus I want to look cool when I’m posting on Magicam.”

Episode Lv Up “You think we’re really close friends? Ehh~ You’re so funny~! Hahaha, I wasn’t saying I hate the idea; why are you making that face? It’s just, you said it so seriously—I guess I don’t know how to react.”

Magic Lv Up “Hmm, so you’re the type who would do things like this for me. Thanks!”

Limit Break “Don’t you think I’ve got wayyy too much potential? Hahaha! Well, thanks for all your help!”

Groovy “Man, aren’t I super cool now? It’s getting me all excited!”

Lesson Select “Let’s do our work together! I’m still your senior, so I should try to impress you ♪”

“You really are super dedicated to things... Do you get that a lot? ...Yup, I thought so!”

“C’mon, give yourself a break. It’s not worth putting so much effort just into your classes.”

Lesson Start “Alright, let’s get things done!”

Lesson End “It’s finally over! Time for my after-class Magicam check!”

Battle Start “Make sure to repost and share all my impressive moves!”

Battle Win “That should be enough. Bye-bye!”

Other

Profile Quote “Welcome to Heartslabyul, the dorm run by the strict ‘Queen’ ♪”

January 2020 Trailer “We’re waiting for our dutiful little freshman!”

Countdown Poster “You have to have fun with croquet and Unbirthday parties ♪”

Login Bonus “Oh, you look like you’re doing well again today~! We should get going soon. But before that, wanna grab some tea so I can get a few shots for Magicam?”

Player Birthday Wish “Happy birthday! You can’t believe I remembered...? As if I’d ever forget this special day! I got a present ready that I think will make you really happy. And there’s no doubt about that, since Cay picked it out! ♪”

Valentine’s Gift Letter (2021)

These letters were originally in English. I didn’t translate or edit them in any way. They came with official merch from Aniplex, and are not present in-game.

Helloooooo, Thanks for the present! It was totally awesome! I didn’t know you were an expert at choosing thoughtful gifts ♪ I already took a picture and put it up on Magicam, so go and give it a Like! ;)

#twisted wonderland #cater diamond #voice lines

176 notes · View notes

shnuggletea · 4 years

Photo

Chapter Three is now LIVE!

You can read chapter three here, on AO3, or on my Patreon! Make sure you check out the amazing art that goes with this fic by the lovely and talented @kirrtash!

Art:

Izayoi, Toga, and the glass between (Unofficial title)

Group shot/movie poster (Unofficial title)

Thank you @inuparentsday for the event that keeps on giving!!

Tags!

@underwater0phelia @lavendertwilight89 @mamabearcat @nartista @nopenname22 @echobows @superpixie42 @smmahamazing @redflamesofpassion @jme-chan @cstorm86 @cicleydark-light @ruddcatha @lavaffair @kirrtash @sistasecbhere @obsessandfangirl @britonell @lordofthechips @mcornilliac @faolenwolf @keichanz @phoenix-before-the-flame @artisticloveexpressitsall @lamuertadehambre @noyourenotreal @mitty-san @thenoammonster @little-deeluna @royaltrashpanda @sailorbabydoll92 @storyweaver2017 @malditamigs @adorabubblesblog @lilms-obsessed @petri808 @anniehcresta @fan-dumpp @itzatakahashi @utakuprincess @theschultinator @all-too-ale @little-inukag-obsessed @theseagullqueen @queenofthesquirps @jolinaaa00 @knowall7k @neutronstarchild @fawn-eyed-girl @eringobroke @sapphirestarxx @clearwillow @dangerouspompadour @misspepperpottss @jayangel10 @master-ray5 @sailorsilverladybug @astraearose93 @egosolivagant @fandompromptsandfun @fandomartlover @holi-holy @kagometaishostory @liz8080

Please let me know if you want on or off the tag train!

“Idiot. Fucking stupid, brazen, jackass!” Miya was taking Toga’s ‘slip up’ as well as expected. “Tom foolery, ridiculous, and stupid!”

“You said stupid twice.”

Miya glared over at Toga while he toweled his wet hair. “The point of letting you get captured was to get information on them not the other way around!”

“I got plenty of info and I even got an informant.”

“Tricking some poor woman into helping you doesn’t count as an informant. And you lost So’unga and Tessiega! What the hell are you going to do about that?!”

Toga grinned and Miya groaned. “I’m going to wait until my informant finds them for me.”

“You realize the amount of danger you’re putting that woman in? And she has no clue either so she doesn’t count as willing in all of this.”

Toga finally felt some guilt. Although all of what Miya said was right on the money, Izayoi not being truly willing that was the only truth he cared about. “Once she gets me my swords, I’ll let her go. Alright?”

Miya wasn’t appeased. “Don’t you think it’ll be far too late by then?”

She wasn’t really sure where she was but she knew she was still in the building. Izayoi hadn’t had the… ability to leave. After watching Toga jump and survive the ‘expressway’ out of the building she hadn’t felt very well. He had been so fast to that window too. There was more to him and she knew it but her mind was so hazy. When she tried to remember more all she could think about was his shining amber eyes and warm smile.

This wasn’t like her; she didn’t get swept up in ridiculous matters like a man’s eyes or smile. She was about the facts and the ones she had… well they didn’t make sense.

Bodies were rushing around her, stepping over her. She was sitting on the floor in the hall just outside her lab. Voices were murmurs in her brain like buzzing bees. She tried to swat them away but they persisted until she was forced onto her feet. In her head, she was playing the moments with Toga over and over again; his strength and speed the main thing she focused on. Which led to her thinking about his muscular figure and strong chin.

It was then that she slapped herself: hard. The voices cleared and she realized she was in trouble. “What did you do?”

It was a lab assistant from Takemaru’s lab. He was accusing her of wrongdoing. It must be the wide open door to their lab and their missing test subject. Looking around, she saw that it was all security, cops, and a few low level scientists and lab assistants. Including the one holding her now very aggressively.

“Excuse me?” She barked, pulling her arm from him as harshly as she could. “That… thing attacked me!”

He looked remorseful and stepped back. While she slipped into her lab. The test tubes were clean; she added ethyl alcohol to them to make sure they were contaminated and unusable. The only thing that remained was Takemaru’s ID card still in her pocket. She moved it from her lab coat pocket to her jean’s. Then stripped off her coat and grabbed her purse. She would be expected to give testimonies. Something she should have been figuring out once Toga left instead of trying to figure out Toga.

Back out in the hall it was even more of a mess than when she left. Takemaru was there now, ranting and raving. Then his eyes landed on her. “Izayoi!” She cringed openly this time but he took no offense. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her and Izayoi was both confused and uncomfortable. “I’m so sorry!” He pulled her back but didn’t let go, holding her a short distance. “Did he hurt you?”

Confused, she shook her head at him. But then it hit her. They thought she was a weak little girl. As offensive as it was, she would use it to her advantage. “He… he used me…”

Not once had she been scared of Toga but they expected her to be. But she couldn’t lie; it went against her nature and ethics completely. So she didn’t.

“He used me to find his things…”

“What was he looking for?” A lab assistant asked.

“His coat and his swords.” She realized yet another opportunity. “I thought that was so strange; that he had swords? Is he crazy or something?”

Takemura huffed. “Yes, he is crazy.”

Lie. Toga wasn’t crazy and she had seen that for herself. He was something else. “So there aren’t swords here belonging to him?”

“No,” Takemaru answered quickly, “because they no longer belong to him. They belong to us; to Shikon.”

She shivered while the others around nodded. They were all drinking the kool-aid now; speaking of the company they worked for like it was a person or God. But she needed to focus because this was a very important moment that she wouldn’t get again. “It seems dangerous to have something like a weapon on the property.”

Izayoi made sure to add in a small whimper and look as weak as possible. Takemaru started rubbing her shoulders in comfort, falling for it easily. “Have no fear, Izayoi. Only one of them is truly dangerous. I have it locked away. The other one we’re carefully studying.”

Carefully studying? That would mean it was on floor nineteen assuming the sword was made of metal. At least she knew where one was but where the hell was the other one? “What are you doing with the really dangerous one?”

Takemaru smirked and then… patted her on her head. “I’m taking good care of it, Izayoi.” This time, she shook in anger but they took it out of context. “You should go home. Get some rest. Take tomorrow off. Your files on the blood are on the index right?”

She hadn’t put anything on the server yet, thankfully. “No. And he made me destroy the samples.”

A little vein popped up on his forehead and the smile he wore was forced. “He did, did he? We will just have to get more then.”

It was harder to give Miya the slip than it was to find where Izayoi lived. Her scent was… distinctive. And he had gotten a good whiff while carrying her around. The balcony he sat on now had hints of her scent but he was sure when she turned on the lights inside.

Three days had passed since he last saw her and even he had to admit that he missed her. Which was strange since he didn’t know her well. She was a stickler for the facts (her notes told him that) and he could tell by her scent and face that she not only knew when she was being lied to, but that she hated when anyone did.

That was good since he couldn’t lie to her.

She had a small bag with her (from the store) that she was emptying into her fridge. Toga watched for a few more seconds before knocking on the glass between them. Izayoi jumped slightly as she turned. The calm that fell over her when she caught sight of him had him feeling warm in his chest. And the way she rushed to let him in made his heart jump; a rare thing for a demon to feel.

Izayoi was barefoot; leaving her heels at the door. The icy chill of the night washed over her feet as soon as she open the door for him. That, and worried someone would see him, had her rushing to get him inside. Toga didn’t hesitate, strutting in but she still tugged him hard. He let her pull him in like it was a struggle for him. But even if it wasn’t her home, Toga still would have hurried in to get out of the cold.

Her place was warm but not hot, a perfect representation of the woman. She made him warm enough without the need for heat. Now they were just standing next to the door he’d come through: staring. “How did you find me?”

Stepping away from her, Toga started looking at her place. It was small but homey, a one room apartment that had a small bed in the corner, a floor table in the middle, and her kitchen in the far corner. “I followed your scent.”

“Oh, ha, ha. Seriously, did you follow me from work?”

“Sort of.”

Izayoi didn’t like that. He shouldn’t be going anywhere near Shikon. Grabbing his hand, she turned him to face her and Izayoi noted that he let her. “You should stay away from there.” The smirk he wore made her chest feel tight. Memories of him jumping from the window flashed in her head. She shook them away quickly but didn’t look at him again, turning towards her couch in the corner instead. “What are you doing here? I haven’t gotten your swords yet…”

“I know. I came to check on you.”

She huffed sadly, trying to go to her kitchen but was stopped by something. “Is that your job? Checking on the people researching you?”

Izayoi tried to walk away from him, but he still had her hand in his. She tugged to a stop when he didn’t let her leave and then looked back at their hands like she forgot she had grabbed him first. “No,” her eyes jumped up to his face, “it’s not my job. I came because I wanted to.” Her eyes went wide and he was drowning in them. So he forced a painful laugh out of his tight chest. “Had to sneak out, actually.”

“Sneak out? You have a keeper or something?”

“Something like that.”

He was being vague and it was on purpose. “Did you have to sneak away from your wife?”

This time, his laugh was pained because he choked on it from her unexpected question. “No. Although, Miya acts like a ball and chain sometimes.”

“Miya?”

This time, he tugged on her, pulling her back the short distance she had gotten away. “I shouldn’t discuss others with you. Okay? I don’t mind telling you about myself but without their permission, I shouldn’t tell you anything about them. Understand?”

Izayoi nodded numbly, staring up at him with her eyes wide again. Toga found he couldn’t stop himself; lifting a hand to brush gently across her cheek. It was warm to the touch which matched the pink color it had. He pretended to sweep a stray hair behind her ear but Izayoi knew there was nothing there. He was just touching her.

She cleared her throat and dropped her head. Effectively breaking the spell on herself but not Toga as he continued to stay near to her; following close behind her as she went to her kitchen. “Would you… like some tea?”

He didn’t really drink the stuff but Izayoi was nervous and wanted something to do with her hands. And it would be nice to drink something hot. “Sure. Thanks.”

Toga stayed near as she filled her kettle and set it on the heat. Izayoi grabbed mugs and tea bags while he watched intently. It was good to have something else to focus on besides his eyes; it had her wits back. “So… you never told me… why are you here?”

In a flash, Toga dug into the from of his red jacket and pulled out a small bundle of files. “I thought you might like these back. I added a few things for you.”

She took them carefully and folded them into herself. “You came here to give me back my files?”

“And some notes of my own!” He added, defensively.

“Thanks,” she responded curtly, holding up the files to wave.

It was a nice gesture and would save her some grief since she had been wanting to study her findings more. But it didn’t tell her more about what Toga was and it didn’t quell the little voice in her head that said ‘he came here to see me’. The voice had been loud at the time. Now it was like a sad whisper.

A nice gesture and yet she felt so… offended.

“You can’t just tell me what I want to know? What did you write anyway?” She said, abruptly opening the returned files and searching for his ‘notes’. Reading for a few moments, she slapped them shut and shoved them back into his hands. “Funny.”

“What?”

Now she was angry. Toga showed up to mess with her. “You wrote ‘cat demon’ next to my blood results. That’s… hilarious, let me tell you.”

“Izayoi…” He stepped up to her and she turned her back on him. It didn’t stop him, looming over her from behind and still having such an overwhelming presence. “I haven’t lied to you once.”

He hadn’t, she was sure of it. But this was different. It felt like a joke. The whistling kettle was her reprieve and she took it. Toga didn’t let up, his breath puffing over her shoulder and down her back. Izayoi took the loud kettle off the heat and didn’t move again, letting him press into her. He ran a hand over her shoulder and stopped at her bicep.

“Izayoi…” She closed her eyes with her name on his lips. He grabbed her arm and turned her slowly to face him; she kept her eyes closed. “I’m not supposed to tell you… anything. It’s… dangerous for you to know…”

“But I want to know you…” she thought, but didn’t dare say out loud.

“Then open your eyes and I’ll show you everything.”

Izayoi didn’t question it, assuming that he read her thoughts off her face or some other telling way and opened her eyes. Toga’s eyes were no longer a soft and comforting amber. Instead, they were a raging red. It startled her, sucking in a sharp breath only to have the red disappear as quickly as it appeared. The scientist grabbed his face, placing a thumb on his cheek and pulling down the skin to look closer at his eye. The demon grabbed her waist and wrapped his arms around her.

She ran her thumb across the purple skin on his cheek. It felt like regular skin; not raised and rough like a tattoo. And it wasn’t faded at all like a tattoo that was healed enough to have no difference in the skin. It was his skin; the color was something he was born with.

“You’re a…” Izayoi started but he stopped her by kissing her, bending down swiftly to shut her mouth with his. She responded instantly by twisting her head to the side and letting him slide his tongue in her mouth. He really just wanted to keep her from saying it outloud but he’d be lying if Toga said that was the only reason. Izayoi had this inexplicable flavor to her; just like her scent, he couldn’t define it.

This was all just to shut her up but Izayoi still felt her mind, body, and heart open to Toga. It was why she let him brush his tongue across her lips and why she responded by licking his fangs. His FANGS! Toga had razor sharp teeth in his mouth. And his hands were pressed into her spine, bending her back.

He suddenly twisted them, spinning them away from the stove before Izayoi got burned. But he kept walking her backwards, unable to stop once he started. She stumbled a few times, causing their mouths to break apart. A few seconds at a time, Izayoi kept coming back to his lips for more. Even when they fell to her couch; Toga fell heavily on her without worry.

Toga was between her legs and his hand slid up her shirt. Just as she was thinking how rough his jacket was on her skin, his hand left her and unzipped it; flinging it across the room soon enough. She had her hands threaded in his hair but with the removal of his jacket, she snuck her hands down and pressed them into his lower back. It pushed up his shirt and she found his skin. He was doing similarly, running his fingers along her ribs while she sucked on his lower lip.

“Toga…” He jumped back when she said his name in her head. Izayoi had moaned it in her mind and it drove him crazy. All of it had; her scent, taste, and the way she felt under him and his touch. Toga was out of control and he needed to get a hold of himself.

Without understanding, Toga was now a short distance from her instead of on top of her. He was pacing as he pulled his jacket back on. Her files were all over the floor from where they were dropped in a daze. Izayoi was still in a daze, her lips burning from the cool air of the room that now hit them.

Toga quickly scooped up the files and dropped them on Izayoi’s lap. “Read my notes. I’ll be back.”

“For… your swords?”

“Yeah.” He dashed away after that. It wasn’t a lie, he would be back and he would be coming for his swords. But it was so much more than that. Toga just wasn’t sure Izayoi understood that.

She sat on her couch putting her cold fingers to her hot lips; wondering if she was now a means to an end for Toga. Pulling open the file on top, she read over his notes. His handwriting was scratchy and manly. Izayoi instantly shook her head for having such a silly thought and read on. He had marked the indicators in her results, ones that she didn’t understand before and labeled them as ‘demon’. It was crazy and yet it all made complete sense.

Izayoi knew Toga wasn’t lying to her. He never had. So now she had to wrap her mind around it all including how she had just made out with a demon.

He hadn’t gotten far from Izayoi’s place when he smelled her. She wasn’t trying to hide; that much was clear. If she wanted to be known then he would just address her, stopping mid ‘flight’ and dropping to the ground from the light posts he had been using. It was the best way to travel; the light blocked him from sight and he could get from place to place much faster without worrying about exposure. It only worked at night but it was better than walking.

“To what do I owe the pleasure, MiLady?”

She stepped out from the poorly concealed spot she had been in and pursed her lips in irritation. “What are you doing, Fighting Fang?”

“I’m just out for a walk…”

“Don’t play me! What are you doing with that human?!” She roared.

Great, she’d been following him. “That’s none of your business anymore. What with us divorced and you sending your goos after me? I’m not inclined to divulge such personal information…”

“Did you tell her about us?”

“No.”

She scoffed. “Of course you did. You and your love for humans…”

“I didn’t tell her shit, MiLady and you need to stay away from her. Unless you want her to figure out more about your kind?”

MiLady’s lips pursed together again, aging her like only Toga could. “My kind is the same as yours. You just forgot. You and I are one and the same, Toga…”

“No, I’m nothing like you or your minions. I believe we can co-exist…”

“Humans are meant to be our slaves not our equals! When will you get that!”

The vein on the side of her jaw was twitching. Something that happened when MiLady was really pissed. Toga was used to it. “If they’re meant to be your slaves then why do you hide from them?” She was silent and he laughed. “Can’t be your slaves if you’re terrified of them!”

“The less they know the better. You used to agree to this fact!”

“And I still do. Which is why I didn’t say a word to Dr. Hime about who or what we are.” He needed her to believe him. It was true, he didn’t say anything to Izayoi. The last thing he wanted was to put a target on the doctor’s back… again. The humans she worked with weren’t a problem but MiLady? She would terrorize Izayoi for sport. “MiLady, if you mess with her, she is just going to use it in her research and figure out everything.”

“All the more reason to erase her from existence.” MiLady threatened.

Nothing more was said. If he fought her on it, MiLady was liking to figure out his attachment. If she hadn’t already. She flicked her fingers across her Meido Stone and disappeared. Not that he hated the idea but now he would have to keep close watch on Izayoi.

Oh the things he did for the sake of humanity

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