#and nature to be selfless and help others. Trying to prove to himself and others a 'true yakuza' is some beacon of honour

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

*head in hands* oh God my parental issues affect my view of Kiryu

[meaningofaeons]

Hi! Can I request hcs about Gepard and Dan Heng with a very playful and kinda overconfident reader. They're a pain in the ass but also very charming so it's hard to be mad at them. I don't know if the name would tell you anything, but they are Wei Wuxian type of menace. Thank you 💛

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈ cheerful mischief

⊹ character(s) - gepard landau, dan heng ⊹ word count - 1.0k ⊹ notes - gn!reader, fluff, tad bit of angst if you squint (reader is a bit reckless :,3), more utc

unfortunately I do not know much about wei wuxian or the series hes from but!! I looked him up so I think I have a good idea what you're looking for anon! thank you for the request!! <3 /ᐠ ̥  ̮  ̥ ᐟ\ฅ

⊹ Gepard Landau

Gepard was consistently endeared and... frankly, worried by your nature.

Being an incredibly patient man, well-trained on his emotional handling as a member of the Silvermane Guards, he could handle your playful attitude and teasing.

Though, let's be clear—"could handle" does not mean "immune to".

The poor Captain had more than his fair share of going red in the face whenever you were around.

It's not that you were trying to tease the poor man, knowing how shy he could get and how easily it could happen, but he was just too easy!

Your energy was contagious, and so was your smile and your laughter. But he definitely noticed your habit of shirking the rules—all in good fun, you'd say.

Gepard would find himself sighing when you ended up getting in trouble with the other guards, ready for another round of justifying your actions and asking for leniency on your behalf. If the Captain asked for it, it was usually done.

It could be a hassle, but... Still, he couldn't be too upset. Not when you looked at him with those big eyes as if to try and absolve yourself of any crimes.

Most situations ended with another long, drawn-out sigh from Gepard, the kind that you always knew meant he wasn't really mad, and a gentle mussing of your hair with the promise to "never do something like that again".

Spoiler: You always did something like that again.

However, you were clearly very caring towards your friends and family. It was something the Captain admired most about you.

It also worried him, however.

There were more than a few instances where he'd find you out with one of your many friends, getting into it with a hoodlum that harassed you two with that signature assertive smirk of yours.

He was concerned in those moments, but not beyond reason.

Sure, he had gone out to patrol this particular section because he heard you'd be around. Surely, it was only to make sure you stay out of trouble, and not because his thoughts are plagued by you in every waking moment or otherwise—

They'll be fine! he'd assure himself. Even they're not that reckless.

You were your own person, and a strong-willed one at that. There was no reason for him to intervene.

Until, of course, he saw that same hoodlum grab your arm on one such day.

Gepard had faith in your ability to worm your way out of anything, always with a wink and a smile—that was how you evaded arrest and looped past the rules so many times, after all.

But when things got physical, he would never hesitate to step in and defend you, knowing your selfless nature.

He noticed a lot about you. But the one thing he never did seem to notice was the way your eyes gleamed with affection in those moments he helped you out.

Maybe one day, though...

⊹ Dan Heng

Dan Heng honestly thought that after meeting and interacting with March 7th, he had seen it all in terms of unfounded confidence and boundless energy.

You proved to be the exception.

Not that he minded, though.

Naturally introverted Dan Heng didn't find himself spending much time with you at first. You seemed more the type to get along with March, or even the Trailblazer.

Even Himeko and Welt, older as they were, seemed taken with your charming nature.

However, eventually, you slowly cracked his reserved little shell. It shockingly didn't take much aside from time.

"Dan Heng, want to see me fight off this Fragmentum Monster? Bet you ten Shield I can take it out in three hits or less!"

"That seems reckless... Besides, what use do you have for Shield? We're only in Jarilo-VI for a brief visit."

"To buy you a nice meal, of course! I've been saving."

You ended that sentence with a usual wink and a pat to his shoulder, running off to defeat the monster anyhow.

Dan Heng would mutter something about "what's the point if I'm the one giving you the money", but what you missed was the faint flush on his cheeks at the notion.

You're just playing around, he'd think. You say things like that all the time to everyone, not just him.

You never got to see past the stoic expression he kept stubbornly on his face, but when he got to the archives after a long day of trailblazing, his mind would be nowhere but you.

To be truthful, though he'd never admit it, your confidence was admiral to Dan Heng.

Though it could be difficult and a bit of a bother to bail you out when your games didn't go to plan, you consistently got back on your feet, never swayed by your circumstances.

It made him think to his own past from time to time, and a small fire ignited in his soul to work on his own confidence with himself.

Not only that, but your dedication to those you cared for.

When an Antimatter Legion monster had descended on you, Dan Heng, March, and the Trailblazer, you were the one who made an opening for the group to escape.

In spite of his reluctance to leave you behind, March had dragged him along, telling him to trust you.

And he did. He really, really did. But a part of him also agonized endlessly over it for every minute you didn't return to the safe zone in the space station.

Eventually, you had turned up—not a scratch on you, of course—but while the others had cheered for your return and complimented your brilliant plan, Dan Heng had only tugged on your sleeve once the two of you were alone.

He didn't say anything, but you noticed the look on his ever-reserved face, and pulled him into a hug.

"Gonna cry on me, Dan Heng? Here, I'll offer you my shoulder. I didn't realize you cared about me this much!" you giggled.

He only buried his face in your shoulder.

"...I don't know what you're talking about."

[youatemylollipop]

Hi! Can I ask for some yandere headcanons for Yandere Izana and Koko (separate)? Thank you!

A/N: I don’t know why, but it always feels like I’m portraying their possible yandere behavior incorrectly.😑

Ft: Kokonoi Hajime & Kurokawa Izana (Tokyo Revengers).

Part One: Hanagaki Takemichi, Ryūguji Ken & Sano Manjirō ➵ Tokyo Revengers

Part Three: Imaushi Wakasa & Sano Shinichiro ➵ Tokyo Revengers

⚠️ WARNING: Yandere, possessiveness, jealousy, manipulation, control, dominance, dependency, obsession, suffocation, violence & criminal activity.

Kokonoi Hajime

➵ Koko's love for his darling is driven by his need for control and dominance. He sees his darling as his property, and becomes possessive and jealous when anyone else tries to get close to them.

➵ Koko is manipulative and cunning, and will use his intelligence and resources to bend others to his will in order to get what he wants. He sees his darling as an extension of himself, and will stop at nothing to maintain his hold over them.

➵ Despite his cold and calculating nature, Koko is deeply devoted to his darling, and will do anything to make them happy. He will shower them with gifts and attention, and is always there to offer support and guidance when they need it.

➵ Koko's love for his darling is all-encompassing, and he will go to great lengths to protect them from harm. He sees himself as their savior, and will do whatever it takes to keep them safe, even if it means breaking the law or risking his own life.

➵ Koko's love for his darling is tied to his need for validation and approval. He sees his darling as a reflection of his own success and worth, and becomes jealous and possessive when they show attention or affection to others.

➵ Koko's intelligence and resourcefulness are often used to manipulate his darling into doing what he wants. He will carefully craft situations and scenarios that force his darling to rely on him, creating a sense of dependence that he can exploit for his own gain.

➵ Koko's devotion to his darling is often expressed through grand gestures and lavish gifts. He wants to prove his love and devotion to them in tangible ways, and will go to great lengths to make them happy.

➵ Koko's love for his darling can be suffocating at times, as he expects them to always be by his side and devote their entire lives to him. He can become upset if his darling shows any signs of independence or individuality, as he sees this as a threat to his control over them.

➵ Koko's obsession with his darling is driven by his need for validation and approval. He sees his darling as the only person who can truly appreciate him and his accomplishments, and he becomes jealous and possessive when others try to take their attention away from him.

➵ Koko is a master manipulator, and often uses his charm and wit to get what he wants. He is skilled at reading people and knows exactly how to push their buttons to get them to do his bidding.

➵ Koko's possessiveness is not limited to just his darling; he also feels the need to control every aspect of their life, including their thoughts and feelings. He wants to be the center of their world, and will stop at nothing to achieve that goal.

➵ Despite his cunning nature, Koko is also deeply emotional and sensitive. He feels everything deeply, especially when it comes to his darling, and will do anything to make them happy and keep them safe.

➵ Koko sees his love for his darling as pure and selfless, and believes that everything he does is for their benefit. He would never intentionally harm his darling, but if anyone were to try to take them away from him, he would stop at nothing to get them back.

You and Koko have been dating for a few months now, and you can tell that he's completely smitten with you. He's always showering you with gifts and affection, and you can't help but feel flattered by his attention.

One day, Koko invites you over to his apartment for a romantic evening together. As soon as you arrive, he greets you with a warm smile and leads you inside. The apartment is dimly lit, with candles flickering on every surface, creating a cozy and intimate atmosphere.

"Welcome, my darling," Koko says, taking your hand and leading you to the couch. "I've been looking forward to spending some quality time with you."

You settle onto the couch, snuggled up against Koko's side as he wraps his arm around your shoulders. You can feel his eyes watching you, studying your every move, and you can tell that he's in one of his possessive moods.

"Is there anything you want to talk about, my love?" Koko asks, his voice soft and gentle.

You shrug, feeling a little uneasy under his intense gaze. "Not really, I'm just happy to be here with you," you say, trying to sound casual.

Koko's expression darkens slightly, and you can tell that he's not entirely satisfied with your answer. "Are you sure there's nothing bothering you?" He asks, his tone growing more insistent.

You start to feel a little trapped under his scrutiny, but you know that trying to resist him will only make things worse. "Well, I guess I've been feeling a little overwhelmed lately," you admit, hoping that he'll be sympathetic.

Koko's face softens, and he strokes your hair gently. "I'm sorry to hear that, my love. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"

You shake your head, feeling a little guilty for burdening him with your problems. "No, it's okay. I'll be fine."

But Koko won't let it go that easily. "Please, let me help you," he says, his voice almost pleading. "I hate to see you unhappy."

You hesitate for a moment, feeling the weight of his intense gaze bearing down on you. But then you nod, knowing that he won't be satisfied until you let him take control.

"Okay, well, I guess I've just been feeling a little... suffocated, lately," you say, the words tumbling out of you in a rush. "I love you, Koko, but sometimes it feels like you want me to be with you all the time, and it's a lot of pressure."

Koko's expression darkens at your words, and for a moment you're afraid that you've gone too far. But then he takes a deep breath, his eyes never leaving yours.

"I understand how you feel, my love," he says, his voice low and soothing. "But you have to understand that you are mine. You belong to me, and I will do whatever it takes to keep you by my side."

You feel a shiver run down your spine at his words, but you can't deny the thrill of being so desired. "I know, Koko," you say, reaching out to touch his face. "And I love you, too. I just need a little space sometimes."

Koko's expression softens at your words, and he leans in to kiss you gently. "Of course, my love," he says, his hand caressing your cheek. "I want you to be happy, always. And I'll do whatever it takes to make that happen."

Kurokawa Izana

➵ Izana's obsession with his darling is rooted in his need for control and power. He sees his darling as a symbol of his kingdom, and believes that by possessing them, he can achieve his ultimate goal of domination.

➵ Izana is extremely possessive and jealous of his darling, and can become violent towards anyone who he perceives as a threat to their relationship. He will go to great lengths to eliminate anyone who he believes is getting too close to his darling, including members of his own gang.

➵ Despite his cruel and ruthless nature, Izana is surprisingly attentive and affectionate towards his darling. He will shower them with gifts and compliments, and is always there to provide emotional support and comfort when they need it.

➵ Izana's affection for his darling is often possessive and controlling. He can become upset if his darling shows any kind of independence or autonomy, as he sees this as a threat to his control over them. He wants to be the center of their world, and will not tolerate any distractions or competition.

➵ Izana's love for his darling is all-consuming, and he will do anything to ensure their happiness and safety, even if it means sacrificing his own life or the lives of others. He sees his darling as his queen, and believes that they are meant to stay by his side.

➵ Izana's possessiveness extends to every aspect of his darling's life. He wants to control every decision they make, from what they wear to whom they interact with. He believes that his darling belongs to him, and he will not tolerate any disobedience or resistance.

➵ Izana's violent tendencies are not limited to those who pose a threat to his relationship with his darling. He has been known to harm innocent bystanders who he perceives as disrespectful or unimportant. He sees himself as a king, and expects everyone to treat him and his darling accordingly.

➵ Izana's love for his darling is intertwined with his love for power and control. He sees their relationship as a means to an end, a way for him to achieve his ultimate goal of dominating the criminal underworld. He will do whatever it takes to ensure that his darling remains by his side, even if it means committing heinous acts or betraying his own gang.

➵ Izana's obsession with his darling is also fueled by his fear of being alone. He sees his darling as the only person who truly understands him and can fill the void in his life, and he cannot bear the thought of losing them.

➵ Despite his violent tendencies, Izana is skilled at hiding his true nature from others. He presents himself as charming and charismatic, and often uses his social status and wealth to gain the trust and admiration of those around him.

➵ Izana's possessiveness extends beyond just his darling; he also feels the need to control every aspect of their life, including their friendships, career, and personal choices.

➵ In his twisted mind, Izana believes that he is doing his darling a favor by eliminating anyone who could potentially hurt or betray them. He sees himself as a hero who is protecting his darling from the dangers of the world.

➵ Izana's love for his darling is not limited to just physical possessions or control. He is also emotionally dependent on them, and cannot imagine living without them. He would do anything to keep his darling by his side, even if it means causing harm to others.

You're sitting in your room, scrolling through your phone when you hear a knock on the door. You look up to see Izana standing in the doorway, a look of adoration on his face.

"Darling," he says, his voice filled with affection. "I've been thinking about you all day."

You smile at him, feeling a mix of love and unease. You know that Izana's obsession with you is not healthy, but you can't help the thrill that comes with being the center of his world.

"Izana, what brings you here?" You ask, trying to keep your tone light.

"I just wanted to spend some time with you," he says, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him. "I've been so busy with the gang lately that I haven't had as much time for you as I'd like.”

You feel a flicker of guilt. You know that Izana wants to be the only thing in your life, and you've been spending more time with your friends lately.

"I'm sorry, Izana," you say, hoping to placate him. "I've just been trying to balance everything."

"I understand, my love," he says, moving closer to you. "But you need to remember that you belong to me. I am your king, and you are my queen. You must prioritize me above all else."

You feel a shiver run down your spine at his words. You know that Izana's love for you is possessive and controlling, but there's a part of you that revels in his attention.

"I know, Izana," you say, trying to keep your voice steady. "I'll do better."

"I'm glad to hear it," he says, leaning in to kiss you. His lips are soft and gentle at first, but then they turn hungry and demanding. You feel his hands on your body, possessive and controlling, and you know that you're in for a rough night.

As he pulls away, you try to keep your breathing even, but you can feel your heart racing. You know that Izana's love for you is not healthy, but there's a part of you that craves his attention and control.

"I love you, darling," he says, running a hand through your hair. "Remember that you are mine, and I will do anything to protect you."

You nod, feeling a mix of fear and love. You know that Izana's love for you is possessive and dangerous, but you can't help the thrill that comes with being his queen.

[the-derpy-duck]

Ok here’s my long ass post about Earthspark Starscream.

None of this is even getting into the final episode of season one because I can’t right now. This show really did body horror and I love it so much.

I love him so so much. I love that the show doesn’t make an excuse for the way Megatron treated him and I like that he was nice. He does bad things and is selfish but also he’s not at the same time? Like horrible friend no doubt but when he was trying to escape he helped his seekers. He lead a jailbreak and he cares at least a bit about the other seekers.

He puts himself first always but also Skywarp was angry at him for not helping. Which would almost imply that at some point he used to help. He shoved her out of his way but he also pushes her out of the way do the energon monster. Was it intentional? Idk. But he did do it. And later in the episode he proves that he can be selfless. He responds well to people showing him kindness. He’s willing to work with the Maltos and follows there plans. He doesn’t even attack them at the end.

Also the fact that no one is like “yeah but you did shitty things so you deserved to be abused” is nice. ‘We’ll obviously no one would say it like that’ have you ever read a transformers YT video comment section? People like finding a way to justify the abuse others go through if they are attempting to fight back and this show says ‘no we aren’t gonna do that. Megaton was wrong to treat his subordinates the way he did.’ Starscream is a bad person, but honestly Megatron is too. His advice to bumblebee on teaching was to use fear because that’s what he did. Optimus tells him ‘don’t use unnecessary force with Starscream’ and guess what he does! I mean you could argue that he technically wasn’t using excessive force but the fact that OP felt the need to tell him not to do that shows something. Like I love this Megatron so much but he still was the leader of a glorified terrorist group. He had good intentions, but it still ended with him leading a group of terrorists.

And the bit where Megatron says he’ll take Starscream somewhere that’s safe and Starscream says ‘no where is safe with you’ is the most thing ever. I love that bit so much. Even if he’s wrong he’s still right because how could he ever feel safe near Megatron or if he knew where he was? The fact that he also automatically assumes the worst in others and is so surprised when Hashtag believed him is so sad to me. Like he’s awful and terrible but he’s also a person who has been hurt by someone who is, from his point of view, helping lock up himself and his subordinates. Starscream is a selfish traitor but Megatron has also betrayed him, his cause (typically, not that applicable to this Megatron), and his people. Also Starscream is telling Megaton to fuck off which I love.

He has the ability to emphasize with Hashtag and he doesn’t want the others to die but he’s spent so much time in an environment that fosters betrayal and constant lying that he can’t just go back for them even if he wanted to. I don’t think he cares either way, but Starscream’s backstabbing nature probably only got as bad as it did BECAUSE he was forced into situations where he could either throw someone else under the bus or be run over. He doesn’t respond as warmly to Skywarp or Novastrom when they showed up (compared to Hashtag) but he had a response. He’s almost apathetic to them but he relaxes slightly and has an almost positive reaction.

Hashtag telling Starscream that bad things happen and it isn’t always their fault was just— AHGHH! I love this episode so much. It’s looking you in the face and saying “hey. that thing you do, where you say this person deserved the abuse they got? Yeah that’s messed up and wrong.” Because people DONT deserve to be abused and no one ever does. ‘Starscream tried to kill Megatron multiple times’ then just imprison, exile, or kill him. And I know that it’s not that simple but if you try to simplify Starscream’s actions then I’m gonna simply Megatron’s possible responses. They both did bad things, we don’t see them doing the bad things in this episode so making an actual judgement is kind of hard but the episode is strongly implying that Megatron abused SS or otherwise unfairly hurt him. I mean SS kind of says it.

Starscream manages to be a really nuanced and complex character without taking away from the others around him. Like Hashtag telling Megatron to leave Starscream alone and Megatron almost shooting Starscream gives all of them more character. Megatron isn’t really WRONG for attacking SS IN THE CAVE. Because if I was Megatron I would assume he would attack the terrains. Hashtag is also a character I didn’t think I’d like as much as I do (her fake evil bit was fun). She cares so much about the people around her and is able to feel empathy for people she shouldn’t and that probably sucks a lot. It’s not a good feeling to feel bad for people and Hashtag is empathetic.

I hope he (SS) will show up more in season two as a neutral force almost like TFP. Because I don’t see him going after the terrains just because they sided with Megatron but he’s also not gonna just join the Maltos. Also Thundercracker pls pls pls. Even if he’s just like ‘fuck this noise’ and then leaves and never shows up again. Just put the Blue guy in.

Twitch trying to recruit more decepticons to Megatron is funny I love her so much.

[lej222]

MHA's River Scene Symbolism - How to Build a Narrative Around a Simple Scene

As the My Hero Academia manga approaches its long-awaited final chapters, I thought it would be good to talk about one of the most important, but also most generally misunderstood moment of the series - Bakugou falling into the river as a kid and Deku trying to help him.

Let me start off by saying that Kohei Horikoshi is great at visual storytelling. In order to understand why he can write redemption stories so well, one has to look at the literal meaning and symbolism behind his panels. Bakugou and Deku's childhood memory, while being the start of their broken relationship, also serves as the first core symbol in the manga that later takes on many different forms. Hands- as Horikoshi says - are very expressive and tell a lot about a person. Shigaraki, for example, has hands all around his body which are tragic reminders of his origin. But what about the panel that started it all?

Bakugou and Deku are intertwined narratively

First of all, we have to talk about just why Bakugou reacted the way he did. Horikoshi's message in the story seems to be that if there's something wrong on the level of society, personal relationships can reflect that same state. The hero society favors those who have powerful and flashy quirks, making them heroes who fight those who were born different than the norm and went down on the wrong path a.k.a. the villains.

Even before getting his quirk, Bakugou could feel that he was different than Deku. He was naturally gifted in many areas, lived a comfortable life, and was praised for the smallest of things by the adults and children around him. If we add his natural brazen personality that he inherited from his mother, Bakugou was a kid both gifted and appreciated by the society. On the other hand, little Deku who lived in the same neighborhood was quirkless, plain, not outstandingly talented at anything and naturally shy and introverted. For Bakugou, who gained the ego of the size of the Moon, it made perfect sense that Deku ended up being quirkless - after all, Deku was unremarkable even before that from the perspective of the collective whole, and him being quirkless only reinforced the idea that Deku was below him. He wasn't outright hostile towards him, but he made clear Deku was someone who should always walk behind him because Bakugou is superior than him.

Until little Katsuki fell into the river. It was a simple moment, but changed their relationship forever. Because little Izuku who was supposed to be a loser ended up the only one who tried to help him. Because Deku showcased that he had the heart and selfless nature of a real hero, something Bakugou didn't have. But Bakugou was supposed to be the remarkable one, so was Deku mocking him by trying to help him? Was he saying that Bakugou needed help because Deku was better? Because this was what Bakugou started to think and became the source of his inferiority complex - he had to prove to himself that he was better by belittling Deku. Not a nice thing to do by any means, but a natural response from a kid whose whole world was shattered in that single moment.

The funny thing is, Deku and Bakugou's reactions stem from the two sides of the same feeling - when you realize someone has something that you don't. Izuku admires Bakugou because he's talented, brave and strong, something which Deku aspires to be (that's why he calls him his "Image of Victory"). Bakugou is afraid of Deku because he's naturally selfless and kind, so he wants to push him away in order to feel better about himself. Bakugou doesn't hate Deku, he hates what his presence in his life represents - that he's not the center of the universe and has to learn as a hero.

Bakugou and Deku both learn from each other in the story in order to become the best versions of themselves. Deku imitates Bakugou when he wants to be brave and improve his moves, while Bakugou's redemption journey is centered around his regrets about Deku. Interestingly they are also both each other's first "save" when their bodies moved without thinking.

Reaching out a hand

The river scene is the core of one of the most important themes of the series - helping those who might not need it and accepting the help that is given to you. Bakugou regrets not taking Deku's hand and not seeing his kindness, the same hand that is able to reach many others and inspire them, like Uraraka, Iida, Todoroki, Kota or even Shigaraki. Deku doesn't believe that Bakugou would ever want to receive help from him. Horikoshi visually paires this idea with the transfer of OFA - we see the users reaching out a hand to pass on the power.

The first OFA user is saved by the second who offered his hand to him. Funnily enough they resemble Deku and Bakugou, even AFO notes it. Whether it's the reincarnation of their will, or just visual parallels, the first OFA transfer happened because a person reached out to another. The manga's message is that one's soul can be saved if they are willing to accept the help others offer and are willing to change themselves for the better. Endeavor and Bakugou both died symbolically to reborn as better people. Shoto was able to reach Touya in order to save his soul. it doesn't mean the villains will be model citizens after these acts, but it's more about the spiritual cleansing of their souls, even if they die.

Deku offered his hand to Bakugou who refused to take it and went down on the path of bad. Years later, Bakugou understands that even if they are the ones who know each other the best, both of them misunderstood the other and regrets not accepting Deku's kindness. He apologizes surrounded by rain. a great call-back to how he was drenched in water and Deku willingly did the same to help him - now Bakugou lets the water cleanse his soul while he shows his most vulnerable side to the person he was afraid of and hurt the most. It really shows how Horikoshi was able to build a great narrative centered around one simple, seemingly unimportant moment that happened between two kids. It has become a great scene that highlights the problems of the hero society, how characters become heroes by offering help to those who need it, and how one can change by atoning for their sins (like what we see with Endeavor as well).

And most importantly, the river scene tells us how one doesn't need a quirk to be a hero if they have a selfless heart, and how Deku has always been and always will be a hero even if he loses OFA.

[hotteoki]

skz as hogwarts students

warnings: like one swear word but lovingly

notes: i first got this idea when i saw felix wearing the striped green & silver jumper in 'felix never bad' skz codes, but for some reason it was seungmin literally fortune telling in 'skz academy' that gave me motivation??

©️ hotteoki | do not repost

chan - gryffindor

chan is definitely a gryffindor, absolutely. he has a clear aura of a leader, as he is, and he's willing to take risks for skz and would do anything to protect them. he puts on a brave face, and doesn't cry or show negative emotions a lot, it’s a bit difficult to get him to open up. however, chan has clear morals and will not hesitate to stand his ground, even when it is not an ideal situation. e.g. remember when certain stays were nagging to him about his live glitching and stopping? he was clearly annoyed and was not afraid to mention it.

minho (민호) - slytherin

a slytherin. do i even need to elaborate. but for the sake of my need to have skz x harry potter content, i will elaborate. i did contemplate if he would suit a ravenclaw more, but his sharpness pulls me more to slytherin. at first glance, minho is a bit more reserved, not very open to others. when he gets comfortable, he has a playful side of him, chaotic but menacing. minho is ambitious, cunning and clever. just from his expression, you can always tell his plotting something, but it is unclear what it is... BUT, he's very resourceful, and will always help those in need.

changbin (창빈) - gryffindor

another gryffindor. he's strong, both physically (MHM 😖) and mentally. changbin's very calm and collected, but also has his loud moments, where his voice will bounce around the walls of the room and he just screams at the top of his lungs. he's quite daring, but also a HUGE softie. he can be very vulnerable, but only if you're willing to accept him, it doesn't happen often because changbin, like chan, puts on a bold face, which sometimes can be misinterpreted the wrong way, common gryffindor mistakes; but he just has a personality a natural leader, i mean his “eomma eomma ga” joke went VIRAL without him even trying.

hyunjin (현진) - ravenclaw

hyunjin’s a ravenclaw. it might sound weird, and he did seem like a slytherin to me at first, but hear me out. he has lots of wit, and creativity, obviously, considering he's an artist. he’s full of charisma and charm without even trying. hyunjin looks for success, he's intellectual, clever, and eccentric. he’s unique, known for his dramatic flair, and may sometimes be very a little judgy if others don’t read his expectations, but he’s a warm hearted soul who only wants the best for others, very ravenclaw attributes.

jisung (지성) - hufflepuff

hufflepuff and i take no criticism or objections. jisung is a literal walking bundle of joy. he brings so much happiness into life, and his extreme loyalty proves just how much of a hufflepuff he is. jisung’s very modest, perhaps to the point where it can be annoying how he never accepts compliments, but it’s endearing in a way that anyone would instantly forgive him. he wants only the best for everyone, and jisung will do everything he can to help them in every way he can.

felix (용복) - hufflepuff

the biggest fucking hufflepuff ever. the living embodiment of a hufflepuff. i will die on his hill. the literal sun himself has the sweetest, most caring, warm soul ever. felix is so loyal, and definitely a hard-worker. he’s such a gem, very modest, shy, cute, anything positive you can think of. take one look on bubble and you’ll see how many people love him, and there’s a reason for that: he’s so selfless, forgiving and honest. it just makes it impossible to hate him. felix may be a bit too trusting at times, and can be very stubborn, but that’s what makes him a true hufflepuff!

seungmin (승민) - slytherin

this one was a bit hard, and i nearly put him in ravenclaw at one point, but he just gives me slytherin vibes, you know? feel free to disagree cause honestly i disagree with myself. seungmin’s not a particularly open person, and he may say things a bit too coolly and some across as uncaring; but deep down, he’s such a genuine soul. he’s clever in a way that’s not academically intelligent, rather, it’s a sense of sneakiness, he’s always up to something, it’s all harmless fun though. he can be very persuasive because of his cunning, something only slytherins can achieve.

jeongin (정인) - hufflepuff

errrr… he feels like a slytherin to me as well though… it’s very rare to hear a slytherpuff, but i think jeongin can very much fit in that category. he’s normally a cute, sweet, baby bread person who’s the walking definition of soft and fluffy, such hufflepuff-y behaviour, and his immature stubbornness definitely pushes him further into that direction; but he’s very mischievous, jeongin’s very skilful in that area. still, i think his hufflepuff qualities overpower his small slytherin attributed though, you can have your opinion on that.

[virgoilluminati]

Belongings

Chapter 10: “Matilda you talk of the pain, as if it’s all alright.”

(Series Masterlist)

A/N: hey it’s been a while, buuUtttt I finally finished this chapter! Whoop whoop 🙌 🙌 . This story is about to get a whole lot more interesting, and it’s time for y/n and Harry to face the music; but not in a way you might think???

Warnings: Angst.

Word Count: 3327

Thursday: @11pm

Will: Y/N, I haven’t be able to get a hold of you, something has come up. I can stay before our wedding now!

Friday: @8am

Will: Y/N, not sure if you are getting these, presuming your phone is dead, because I know what you’re like haha. But we need to talk, it’s about the bakery

Friday: @11am

Will: Y/N, please call me. It’s your dad, he can’t handle this on his own.

Will: Y/N! Are you even getting these messages.

Friday: @4pm

Will: Please y/n, call me. I don’t want something bad to happen. I’m trying to stop it but you have to call me.

Will: y/n after everything that’s happened. I am sorry.

Friday: @9pm

Will: hey I’m not sure if you’re gonna get this, presuming that the service in your hotel is bad or we keep missing each other but, the problem has been resolved. Don’t worry - I have sorted it out. Have a nice time and call me when you’re back.

Saturday:@8am

Will: hey, when you get back please come to the bakery, we really need to talk.

***************

As Harry wakes up early in the morning, he finds himself in a delicate situation. Y/N is peacefully sleeping beside him, and he wants to preserve the tranquility of the moment without disturbing her. With a mixture of adoration and caution, Harry quietly admires Y/N's peaceful gestures, gently stroking her hair as she softly slumbers.

However, his curiosity and unease get the better of him when he notices notifications popping up on Y/N's phone. Harry's initial instinct is to ignore them, respecting Y/N's privacy and the boundaries of their relationship. He knows it would be wrong to invade her personal messages.

Yet, despite his intentions to let it be, the notifications persist, and Harry can't help but notice one particular contact—Will. His heart skips a beat, and conflicting emotions swirl within him. He recognizes that reading Y/N's texts is a violation of trust, but the temptation to know what lies behind those messages gnaws at him.

In a moment of realization and a desire to protect their connection, Harry decides to take a different course of action. He feels it's best not to let the potential distractions of those messages come between them during their special week away. With a heavy heart, he takes a deep breath and deletes all of his own texts, not wanting Y/N to become preoccupied or conflicted by the reality of their situation.

It's a difficult decision, driven by a mix of selflessness and fear, but Harry hopes that by doing so, he can maintain the integrity of their time together and shield Y/N from any unnecessary complications. He knows that when the right moment comes, they will address their relationship openly and honestly.

With a sense of heaviness and a tinge of guilt, Harry sets aside the phone and turns his attention back to Y/N, their peaceful slumber, and the promises their future holds

Y/N and Harry decide to conclude their week in London with a trip to the picturesque South Downs, a range of rolling hills located in Southern England. They embark on an adventure to climb one of the hills in the area, eager to take in the breathtaking views and enjoy the beauty of the countryside.

As they arrive at the chosen hill, Y/N and Harry begin their ascent, taking in the natural surroundings and the refreshing countryside air. The climb proves to be invigorating, and they find themselves immersed in the tranquility of the landscape.

As they reach the top of the hill, they are rewarded with a stunning panoramic view of the South Downs stretching out before them. The rolling green hills extend as far as the eye can see, dotted with quaint villages and framed by the clear blue sky. Y/N and Harry pause for a moment to soak in the beauty of the scene, feeling a sense of awe and contentment.

They find a comfortable spot to sit and unpack a picnic they had prepared earlier. Surrounded by nature's beauty, they enjoy a delicious lunch while sharing stories, laughter, and the warmth of their company. The peacefulness of the surroundings creates a serene atmosphere, allowing them to relax and forget about the hustle and bustle of city life.

“Y’know, one thing I can’t get past, why now? If you’ve felt like this for a while, why didn’t you just tell me?” Y/N asked taking a bite out of her marmite sandwich.

“Because, relationships ‘an me, don’t work. Never had. I got close to someone, they then get scared and overwhelmed and leave. Didn’t wanna even risk it with you-.” Harry opens up about his struggles with relationships, expressing his fear of burdening someone else with the pressures of his fame and his inability to maintain long-term commitments.

“I guess that’ changed when I told you-.”

Y/N listens attentively, understanding the weight of Harry's words and the vulnerability he is showing. They take a moment to gather their thoughts before responding. With a gentle smile, Y/N reaches out and places a hand on Harry's, offering comfort and support.

“I’d never leave’ you. Y’know that? Believe me, even if I tried, you Harry Styles follow me wherever I go,”

In a heartfelt response, Y/N assures Harry that finding the right person is key to overcoming his fears. They explain that a strong and healthy relationship is built on mutual understanding, trust, and shared experiences. Y/N acknowledges the challenges that come with Harry's fame but emphasizes that true love and support can withstand any pressure or obstacle.

Harry's eyes meet Y/N's, filled with a mix of gratitude, affection, and newfound hope. In that heartfelt moment, the air between them becomes charged with emotions. Their connection deepens, and they both feel the weight of their unspoken feelings.

Without hesitation, Y/N leans in, capturing Harry's lips in a tender and sentimental kiss. It's a moment of realization and the beginning of a new chapter in their relationship. The world around them seems to fade away as they embrace the authenticity of their emotions.

After the kiss, they pull back slightly, their foreheads gently resting against each other's. They exchange a shared look, a silent acknowledgment that they are ready to embark on this journey together.

Feeling a renewed sense of optimism and excitement, Y/N and Harry embrace the significance of the moment. They continue to cherish their time on the hill, knowing that their bond has deepened and that they are now on a path of love, understanding, and support.

“When we tell Will, it’s gonna be hell, for a while. But we’ll get through it. I promise,” Harry responds, knowing deep down that life was going to get much harder.

*******************

"Hey, Will," Y/N replied, forcing a smile as she stepped closer to her supposed fiancé. "It's good to see you too."Y/N glanced at Harry, her eyes momentarily betraying the complexity of her emotions. She released his hand with a gentle squeeze, trying to hide any hint of hesitation or longing.

She kept her tone light and cheerful, trying her best to maintain the façade. Deep down, she knew this charade couldn't last forever. There were decisions to be made, and she couldn't keep living a lie.

Will approached Y/N and enveloped her in a warm hug. She leaned into it, seeking comfort and familiarity. But as she closed her eyes, she couldn't help but think of the man standing just a few feet away. Harry, her true love.

They had embarked on this ruse for the sake of protecting their relationship, but it was becoming harder to deny their feelings. Y/N knew that sooner or later, she would have to confront the truth and face the consequences.

As Will released her from the embrace, Y/N took a step back and glanced at Harry, silently communicating a mix of sorrow and determination. They both knew that their time together as an engaged couple was drawing to an end, and they had to find the right moment to reveal their true feelings.

But for now, Y/N had to focus on the present, on the act she had to maintain. She turned her attention back to Will, forcing herself to be fully present, at least until she could find the right moment to be honest with him.

As they engaged in small talk, Y/N couldn't help but steal glances at Harry, their eyes silently conveying the depth of their connection. They both understood that they couldn't keep up the pretense forever, but until the time was right, they had to play their roles.

“Y/N.” Y/Ns father came from around the corner, clearly concerned, looking like he hadn’t slept it days. Immeadiatly, she rushed to his side, hugging him and asking what was wrong.

In the wake of the tense situation with Harry and Y/N, Florence and Will exchange a significant glance, silently communicating their shared knowledge of the circumstances. With a mixture of regret and sorrow, they turn their attention back to Harry and Y/N, who remain unaware of the underlying turmoil.

Florence, hesitant but resolved, finally speaks up. "We tried to reach you," she admits, her voice tinged with a hint of sadness. Will adds, "But it was too late."

Harry, perplexed by the cryptic exchange, demands answers. "What was too late? What's going on?"

Y/N, sensing Harry's confusion, steps in, attempting to sort out the situation and seek comfort from him. She feels a mix of emotions—worry, confusion, and a deep sense of loss. However, she also knows that Harry is just as clueless as she is about the unfolding events.

"It's about the bakery, Harry," Florence finally confesses, her gaze downcast as she wrestles with the weight of her words. "We couldn't afford to keep it running."

Y/N's heart sinks as the reality of the situation begins to sink in. She tries to assure herself that she had savings set aside for such emergencies, and she had shared them with her father in case things got worse. She pleads with her father, hoping he had used the funds.

But her father, stubborn and proud, rejects the idea. "I refuse! Those savings were for your dreams, not for this. Besides, it wasn't enough."

Y/N is devastated, feeling the weight of their family's legacy slipping through their fingers. She mourns the loss of the bakery, an integral part of their lives and their identity.

However, Will interrupts the despair with a glimmer of hope. He explains that his family stepped in to save the bakery, taking it over to ensure its continuation. Y/N, confused and unable to comprehend Will's involvement, looks at him with a mix of surprise and gratitude.

"How?" she manages to ask, her voice choked with emotions.

Will moves to the counter, placing a new pin, symbolizing the continuation of the bakery. "My family offered their help," he replies softly. "Consider it an early wedding gift."

Y/N's heart sank as she processed Will's words. The realization of what it meant hit her like a tidal wave. The family bakery, a place filled with memories, love, and her dreams, was no longer hers. It had been taken over by Will's family, effectively binding her to this arranged relationship even more.

Her mind raced with conflicting emotions. Gratitude for the saving of the bakery warred with a sense of loss and the feeling of being trapped. She had always dreamed of running the bakery, of preserving her family's legacy. But now, it seemed like that dream was slipping away, replaced by a future that was not of her choosing.

Y/N's gaze shifted to Harry, her eyes pleading for understanding and support. She wanted him to see the turmoil inside her, to assure her that they would find a way out of this predicament together. But even as she sought comfort from him, she knew that the revelation of her true feelings for him would only complicate matters further.

As Y/N's father stood there, guilt and exhaustion etched on his face, she realized the sacrifice he had made. He had chosen to let go of the bakery to ensure her financial security. And while her heart ached for the loss, she couldn't deny the love and concern that lay behind his decision.

Taking a deep breath, Y/N turned her attention back to Will, her supposed fiancé, and the man who now held control over her family's legacy. She knew that she needed to tread carefully, to find a way to regain her independence without causing irreparable harm.

“I thought you’d be happy.” Will argues in fustration. Allowing his true temper to show through now it was just the two of them.

“I am. It’s just-.” Y/N wasn’t happy. She knew deep down, will owing this place meant, nothing she ever did here would be hers any more. It would be theirs. A world which she no longer wanted.

“I should’ve been invovled in the conversation.”

“Well, I’m sorry. It’s not like you went and left us for London for a week.” Will snaps, shaking his head.

Y/N's eyes widened at Will's outburst, his frustration finally breaking through the surface. She had known him as a patient and understanding person, but now his true temper was on display, and it startled her.

"I understand that you're frustrated, Will," Y/N

responded, her voice calm but tinged with a touch of sadness. "But this is a lot for me to process. The bakery was my family's legacy, and now it feels like I've lost a part of myself."

Her words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of her disappointment. She had hoped that Will would comprehend the significance of what had happened, but his defensive response only added to her doubts and concerns.

"I never wanted to leave you and my family," Y/N continued, her voice filled with a mix of pain and understanding. "I needed that time away to figure things out, to find myself and discover what I truly wanted. It wasn't about abandoning anyone; it was about finding my own path."

As they stood there, the weight of their unspoken emotions still lingering in the air, Y/N couldn't help but steal a glance at Harry. It was a silent reminder that there were still choices to be made, and that their hearts held the key to their true happiness.

******************

Y/N's gaze intensifies as she confronts Harry about his suspicious behavior. She can sense that something is amiss, and her instincts push her to uncover the truth. She presses him further, urging him to open up and share whatever is bothering him.

Harry, caught in a web of guilt, initially tries to dismiss Y/N's concerns with a simple denial, saying it's nothing. But Y/N's persistence and their deep connection make it difficult for him to maintain the facade.

With a heavy sigh, Harry finally admits to his actions. He confesses that he had intentionally deleted all of the conversations between Y/N and Will, effectively blocking her from being aware of the ongoing situation with the bakery. The weight of his deceit hangs in the air between them.

Y/N's heart sinks, her eyes welling up with a mixture of hurt and betrayal. She feels a deep sense of disappointment, knowing that the person she trusted and considered the love of her life had invaded her privacy, going through her personal messages, and then deliberately lied to her face.

A wave of emotions crashes over Y/N—anger, hurt, and a sense of betrayal. She feels robbed of the chance to make informed decisions about her family's bakery and deeply wounded by the breach of trust.

Unable to find the right words to express her emotions, Y/N looks at Harry, her eyes filled with a mixture of pain and disappointment. The silence between them is heavy, and the damage inflicted on their relationship is palpable.

“Say something.”

“Say anything at all!”

“I can’t believe you! After everything I’ve done - you did this to me! If I were here I could’ve stopped this! I could’ve been able to get the money together.”Y/N's voice trembles with a mix of anger, hurt, and frustration as she responds to Harry's explanation. The weight of the situation hangs heavy in the air, and the tension between them reaches its peak.

““I didn’t know that it was about this! I thought he was going to try convince you to come home! And I didn’t want you to leave me! I thought you’d read his text, then realise that this was all wrong and go back to him.” Harry's face contorts with regret and remorse, realizing the gravity of his mistake. He never intended to hurt Y/N or undermine her abilities. His actions were driven by fear and a misguided attempt to protect their relationship.

“So you didn’t trust me.”

“That’s not what I said!”

“It’s what you meant. You, Harry fucking styles didn’t trust me! A women who is willing to drop my family, my friends and my fucking fiancé for you, and yet you don’t trust me to know who I want.”

“Y/N! I do trust you, I do I just-.”

“Leave!” Y/N snaps, leaving him speechless. In all of the years they had been close he had never seen her this angry before. And to know he had caused this made him want to die.

Y/N's words strike Harry like a dagger to the heart. The anger and hurt in her voice reverberate through his entire being, leaving him speechless and overwhelmed with guilt. He watches in silence as she walks away, her footsteps echoing the distance growing between them.

The weight of the moment settles heavily upon Harry. He never imagined he could cause Y/N so much pain and anger. The realization that his actions had led to this breaking point fills him with a profound sense of remorse. It feels as though the ground beneath him is crumbling, and he is left standing in a wasteland of his own making.

As Y/N's anger lingers in the air, Harry's mind races, desperately searching for a way to make amends and repair the damage he has caused. He knows that mere apologies will not be enough, that he must prove through his actions that he is willing to change and regain her trust.

A wave of regret washes over Harry as he replays the events that led to this moment. He had acted out of fear and insecurity, seeking to protect their relationship but only succeeding in driving a painful wedge between them. He wishes he could turn back time, undo his actions, and rewrite the narrative.

With a heavy heart, Harry contemplates the depths of his love for Y/N and the devastating consequences of his mistakes. He understands that the road to redemption will be long and uncertain. But he also knows that he cannot give up without a fight, that he must confront his own shortcomings and strive to become the person she deserves.

“Y/N. I know you angry, but please don’t do this-, we can get through this together-.” Harry yells, running over to y/n attempting to comfort her. In response she immediately walks away, going back to the kitchen to speak to Will and her dad; wanting nothing to do with Harry.

Harry's desperate plea echoes through the air, but Y/N remains resolute in her decision to distance herself from him. She continues walking, determined to seek solace and support from her family, leaving Harry standing there, feeling the weight of his mistakes.

“Go Harry. Please.”

[franklyshipping]

The Measure Of A Hero ~ A Markiplier Ego Fanfic (Sequel to Tickle-Hungry)

HEYO! Time for another delightful anon prompt featuring Silver and Bim, and this one counts as an unofficial sequel to Tickle-Hungry! So let's see what they get up to this time! LET'S DO THIS!

TAGGING: @bimlee-trimmer @bim-trimler and @silvlee-shepherd

It had been a little while since that fateful day. The day when Bim Trimmer and Silver Shepherd confessed their feelings for each other, all thanks to tummy nibbles. The vivacious presenter and bright hero had swiftly become one of the most marvellous power couples in the ego manor. Everyone thought they were utterly adorable, especially Bim and Silver themselves! They doted on each other; Silver was always in the audience whenever Bim was filming something new, praises at the ready, whilst Bim was always on hand to pamper Silver and get him treats after the hero’s long days and nights patrolling. The two of them, with their love languages of words of affirmation and acts of service, were just a wondrous match, proved by what Bim was doing for Silver today.

Silver had had the same super suit ever since he manifested into reality, and to be honest it was pretty flimsy, but thanks to him being so adept and agile he rarely messed up in a way that a needle and thread couldn’t fix. That is until a few days ago, when he was reaching to a high tree branch during a cat rescue and his suit split all the way down the back. Silver came home with a continent-sized pout, and as soon as Bim learned what happened he began his own special mission. He was going to make Silver a new suit himself, from scratch, and it was going to be fabulous!

They were stood in Bim’s room, and Silver was so bashful as Bim got out his measuring tape, some fabric swatches, stitching patterns, a journal with potential logo ideas – basically a whole entire portfolio which Bim was calling “just some little ideas”. Just when Silver thought he couldn’t adore Bim anymore, he pulled something like this! Thoughtful and selfless to the core.

‘Alright then, time I took some measurements. Suit off please darling.’

Bim remarked, his fingers playing with the tape measure as he grinned cheekily as Silver. Silver, of course, blushed – Bim loved how easy it was to make those heroic cheeks warm up, he couldn’t help but be flirty or teasy any chance he got. He watched as Silver got the tattered suit off, leaving him in his underclothes, a casual top and leggings, and Bim’s grin widened.

‘Ooh cute leggings, very well fitting–‘

‘Shush!’

‘Aww why? It’s not like there’s anyone else here.’

Silver gaped at Bim cutely, still often caught off guard by his utter audacity. He giggled when Bim gave him a little kiss.

‘It’s still flustery!’

‘It is?’

‘Yes!’

Bim snickered, and decided to tickle softly under Silver’s chin.

‘Oh I love how easy to tease you are.’

‘Sh-Shut up…’

Silver gave him a mock pout, which Bim naturally banished with another little kiss. Bim proceeded to sit down on a little stool, put a notepad on his knee, and started measuring. He started with his ankles – though Silver’s suit was beyond repair, his boots were immaculate, so the new suit had to have the same ankle seals as the old one. Then he took some measurements of his calves, all easy enough, with no drama to be found whatsoever. That is, until the tape measure slid up to wrap around one of Silver’s thighs. The hero squeaked lightly as his leg twitched, and Bim gave him a knowing grin.

‘Keep still, I have to get this right sweetie.’

‘I-I know!’

Silver retorted cutely, the apples of his cheeks going pink as he tried to ignore how the sliding of the tape measure really tickled him. Seeing this… Bim just couldn’t help but have a little fun. He subtly played around and fiddled with the tape around his thigh, so he could give the ticklish area some little traces and tweaks. Watching Silver trying to keep still, and hold in his giggles, was adorable – but he couldn’t do it forever. After about a minute he finally spluttered.

‘B-Bihihim stahahappit!’

‘Sorry sorry, I couldn’t resist!’

Bim replied to Silver’s giggly splutter, and he winked at Silver playfully before he bowed his head to note down the next figure. Silver pursed his lips down at Bim cutely… and in a moment of impulsiveness, he reached down and mussed up Bim’s perfectly styled hair. As soon as he felt it, Bim gasped dramatically. His hair, it’s style, sleekness, was his damn pride and joy! He gaped at Silver, who was giggling at his reaction, with an incredulous smile.

‘How DARE you!’

‘You started it!’

‘Oh it’s like that is it?’

‘Yehes!’

Silver’s tongue was poking out through his teeth as he grinned… well, Bim certainly wasn’t going to have that! His indignant expression turned to one of deviousness, and before Silver could react Bim had wrapped his arms around Silver’s thighs and was tickling the absolute hell out of them! Not just scratching at his thighs but sneaking pokes to his hips, and teasy pinches to the backs of his knees. Silver almost buckled, bending double as he burst out laughing and tried to hop away.

‘AHHH! Nonononohohoho nahahat fahahair!’

Silver babbled, unable to escape Bim’s tickle hug as his legs tingled from all the tickling, and he thought he might topple at any moment! Bim smirked up at him and teased.

‘You know what happens when you mess with my hair! I can’t just not punish you…’

Silver was a mess of giggles and yelps as Bim continued his playful onslaught, his heart melting at all of Silver’s endearing reactions. He kept at it for a fair amount of time too, long enough for Silver to start snorting as he exclaimed.

‘Ihihihi’m sahahaharry! Ihihihi’ll fihix yohour hahair!’

‘Oh yeah? You promise not to tousle it even more?’

‘Yehehehes!’

Bim chuckled, then had mercy on him. He grinned as Silver panted, catching his breath with an embarrassed flush on his face. Then, just when Bim thought he couldn’t melt any more, Silver fixed his hair. The hero’s fingers carded through it softly, just barely grazing his scalp as he patiently got it back in its stylish place. Bim let out a purr, slumping a little as he and Silver shared a loving look. Bim was also struck by Silver’s flushed, beaming post-tickle state. He was so pretty.

When Silver finished with Bim’s hair, the movement of his arms caught the presenter’s eye – well, more accurately the way Silver’s biceps were subtly flexing make Bim’s heart flutter. He also remembered he still had a few measurements to do! He got to his feet and brandished the tape measure playfully.

‘I think I definitely need to measure those lovely muscles of yours.’

Silver laughed, seeing where Bim was looking, and he gave him a cheeky flex as he replied.

‘Well, if you insist.’

‘Oh I really do.’

Silver snorted and rolled his eyes fondly. Bim had him relax his muscles so he could do a proper measurement, but also measured them when they were flexed so he knew just how much elasticity the new suit’s material would need to have. Though, measuring Silver’s biceps didn’t come without a few giggles – mainly because Bim couldn’t help but tease the end of his fabric tape measure in Silver’s armpit to make him yelp (and subsequently allow Bim to “sadly” have to re-measure). Bim even did it when he was measuring his chest, having to bite back a grin as he teased.

‘Honey, what did I say about keeping still?’

‘S-Sohorry I-EEK!’

Silver flinched with yet another squeal when he felt yet another “accidental” swipe in one of his exposed hollows. Of course the hero knew it was all on purpose, but he loved the game far too much to call it out! He blushed and smiled as Bim sighed and playfully tutting at him, going in for a re-measure.

‘Honestly, you’re lucky the villains you fight don’t know about how sensitive you are! Imagine them defeating you with one little finger in your armpit.’

Silver gaped and went bright red at his comment, his brain immediately imagining the scenario in his head and bringing out a flood of spluttery giggles.

‘D-Dohon’t sahahay stuhuff lihike thahat!’

‘Aww, is my tough guy getting embarrassed again?’

‘Y-Yes yohou meheheanie!’

Bim laughed, noting down the next measurement before he leaned in and gave Silver a little kiss – a kiss which gave him an excuse to whisper nice and close.

‘Thank you for indulging me today… all I’ve been able to think about is giving you tickles…’

Silver’s blush was coating his ears and neck by this point – Silver was still awed by how Bim could so easily remark on his ler moods aloud, whereas when he was in a lee mood eye contact was even a struggle! He rubbed away the tingles in his underarms as he smiled bashfully and stuttered.

‘I-It’s okay… I… I was also… u-um…’

Bim grinned fondly at Silver trying to admit his want for tickles. He kissed his cheek gently, stroking through his hair as he murmured.

‘I know… speaking of which, are you ready for me to tickle–ahem, sorry, tackle the final little measurement?’

Bim glanced down to Silver’s middle, aka Silver Shepherd’s most notorious area of ticklishness. Silver blushed and nodded with a shy, yet clearly giddy, smile. Bim rolled up Silver’s top and slowly slid the tape around his waist… and not even a second after it teased his skin, Silver jumped away with an explosion of giggles!

‘Wahahait wahahait! Ihihi wahahasn’t reheady!’

Bim laughed with a bright grin, covering his mouth with his hand.

‘Oh my God honey–‘

‘Shuhush dohohon’t lahaugh!’

‘Sohorry, sorry… do you want to do this sitting down?’

‘Noho I can do ihit!’

Silver retorted with a cute pout on his face as Bim snickered. Silver took a few adorable deep breaths, before coming back over and clearing his throat.

‘O-Okay okay do it…’

Bim grinned, and delighted in sliding the tape measure around Silver’s waist once more, letting it tease the creases of his hips and just below his bellybutton. Silver didn’t jump away this time, but instead covered his face as he snorted and burst into giggles.

‘My my, what a giggly client I have. Now let’s see– oh oops!’

Bim gasped, and Silver watched him “accidentally” drop the tape on the floor – Silver let out a giggly whine as Bim picked it up, but the hero couldn’t help but love how Bim was torturing him a little. Bim smirked, holding up the tape playfully again.

‘Let’s try that again shall we?’

He slid it round Silver once more, coaxing out a squeal as he used all his willpower to keep himself still. His giggle fit had him trembling, and Bim had to hold back his own laughter – Silver’s incredible sensitivity never ceased to amaze him, it was one of the many things that kept him falling head over heels for him over and over again. Bim deliberately shifted the tape around, giving little squeezes now and then in which drew out more cute snorts.

‘Ohohoho my gohohohod huhuhurry uhuhuhup!’

‘Now now, a true craftsman cannot rush.’

Bim retorted teasingly, and Silver whined as he peeked through his fingers at Bim – his chocolate brown eyes were bright and watery as he replied.

‘Pleheheheheeeease!’

Yep. Bim Trimmer was, once again, absolutely head over heels. He had mercy, stowing the tape in his pocket as he noted down the final measurement. Silver gasped and took a deep breath, lowering his hands from his face… only for Bim to lean in and deliver a sneaky kiss to his bellybutton at the last second!

‘AHH– B-BIHIHIM!’

Silver shrieked and flailed, immediately covering his tummy as Bim laughed warmly. He came over and opened his arms to him.

‘I’m sorry I had to, you’re too cute when I kiss your button.’

Silver was pretty certain his blush was going to be permanent feature after all this! He rolled his t-shirt down with a bashful smile, and buried his face in Bim’s chest with a giggle as they hugged. Bim rubbed Silver’s back, and smirked when the hero mumbled.

‘You’re lucky I love you…’

‘Oh believe me, I know just how lucky I am.’

Silver giggled again, and let out a sigh when Bim cupped his face and kissed him warmly, before pinching his cheek softly.

‘Now then, how about we get waffles and design the greatest superhero suit to ever grace the multiverse?’

Silver beamed, and Bim laughed when he gave him and excited kiss and tugged at his hand happily.

‘Heck yeah!’

Bim grinned, letting Silver yank him out of the room as flutters and warmth flooded both their hearts. It’s easy to rate things, measure things, assign value to the things in your life, including your own value sometimes. That’s the perfect thing about love. It is, and always will be, immeasurable.

AHH HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS LEMME KNOW IF YA DID! WOO LUV YOUS!!

[thisisjustmefangirling]

BBC Merlin rewatch, 1x05 : "Lancelot"

Today, we meet Lancelot !

Why doesn’t Merlin use his magic to protect himself against the griffin ? He didn't even try. Maybe he was too scared... some fics say it's because he was still recovering from being poisoned.

Aaaand from the get go we are introduced to Lancelot as a brave and selfless character, a hero willing to risk his life to save someone else.

It's nice to see Arthur and Uther out in the forest doing kingly things, checking out villages together.

"You could shame the great Arthur himself" awww Merlin you're sweet, acknowledging what a good fighter Arthur already is.

"You face the most feared of all foes, the ultimate killing machine. You face me." This much bragging and ego is giving serious Gilderoy Lockhart vibes and makes me want to laugh but Arthur actually has the skills to support his claim. He took out that Wessex guy in less than 30 seconds. The guy had two swords, and Arthur did not even use his own, he ducked, punched and kneed the guy, and voilà.

I LOVE sword fighting scenes. Especially when they involve Arthur.

Arthur points out he's the third noble to fail the test this month and "How am I meant to defeat Camelot with rubbish like that ?" and I think it nicely sets up the idea that the knights of the Round Table will be coming from elsewhere and deep down he juges them by their skills and honor.

As another post has already pointed out, Arthur rejects the idea of Merlin becoming a knight ("I think I might be able to help") not because Merlin is not noble born but due to what he thinks Merlin lacks for the job. "Courage, fortitude, discipline"

Aaaand Merlin openly lies. "He IS a nobleman".

"Thanks Arthur. You won’t regret it". Merlin doesn’t even bother with "my lord" or "sire" or "your highness" haha.

Merlin suddenly develops a talent for forgery. Congratulations.

Geoffrey of Monmouth's eyebrows are impressive and probably fake.

Gwen highlights Merlin's kindness : "Merlin would do anything for anyone"

Gwen and Lancelot are cute together

Nice music as Merlin and Lancelot walk in the corridor

Did I mention I love to see Arthur training his knights and himself ? Cause I do.

"Lance... lot". Thanks Arthur now I imagine Philomena Cunk going "Lance A Lot" just like she said "King Arthur came a lot, didn't he ?"

Maybe you think that Arthur slapping Lancelot was a dick move; to me it shows he's fed up with nobles who think their skills are better than what they truly are. He NEEDS good fighters to defend his kingdom. "Sluggish reactions. On the battlefield, you'd be dead by now". Have you already been on the battlefield, Arthur ? I wonder.

Lancelot shows he's tenacious by getting back up and declaring he's ready now.

I think Arthur is amused by Lancelot's eagerness to prove himself, and he likes it, and him. Look at his face... He's smirking :

The real dick move was making Lancelot cleaning the stables.

Lancelot went straight to Merlin's room... do they sleep in the same room ?

"Your magic is not a toy, Merlin. It is not for you to use and abuse as you see fit." Ugh Gaius you're annoying.

Also Lancelot is right on the other side of the door while they talk about Merlin's magic ??? Gaius you keep berating Merlin for his use of magic, for fear he could be found out, but you are not discreet at all !

Great fight scene between Lancelot and Arthur, who seemed eager to test this newcomer.

I love the way Bradley moves. I don't know anything about how much training he got for these fight scenes but there's a great physicality to him, his arms and shoulders seem nicely developed and used to the exercise. He hasn’t lost any of that, he was fantastic in "Vikings : Valhalla", though it felt strange to see him playing a villain.

Arthur is in a rush to have Lancelot be tested and be knighted. He smells potential.

I love that Lancelot bested Arthur by being more clever than him and tricking him. I didn’t think it was in his nature.

Morgana eyeing Lancelot makes me laugh

Oh look, women with wimples.

Morgana looks beautiful in burgundy.

I can't believe Arthur is staring at Morgana and Lancelot is staring at Gwen and they bond over "do you think she's beautiful?" Like... Arthur and Lancelot should have had a strong friendship on this show, aren’t they supposed to be best friends in the original texts and some of the adaptations ? I know a book in which Arthur, Guinevere and Lancelot have a threesome to make sure Guinevere gets pregnant. Arthur and Lancelot were close enough for that. Of course here, Merlin is/will be Arthur's best friend... but Arthur deserves to have friends, and to have friends left after being betrayed by so many people by season 5. He was too lonely. Look, he's smiling at him here :

"He [Lancelot] is not really my type".

"Sometimes Guinevere, I wonder if you would know what your type was if he was standing right next to you." Merlin you are standing right next to her...

This episode is so funny for this, all the main characters are looking at someone and their looks are not returned. Arthur is looking at Morgana, who's looking at Lancelot, who's looking at Gwen, while Gwen is looking at Merlin, who is looking at Arthur and Lancelot.

MERLIN MAKING GWEN CHOOSE BETWEEN ARTHUR AND LANCELOT WHEN SHE'S NOT INTERESTED IN ANY OF THEM YET OMG. "Just for the sake of the argument".

This is another one of these occasions when Arthur and his knights are wearing CHAINMAIL, something you wear for PROTECTION in BATTLE, at a feast. Yes, you're knights, we get it. You're also the Prince, Arthur. Wear something fancy.

I never get tired of seeing Pierrefonds from afar.

You are wearing your fancy vest this morning Arthur, so why couldn’t you wear something similar last night ?

Uther doesn’t need chainmail either but it could go with his paranoid personality so I'll let it slide, especially since he's wearing a nice dark... surcoat ? I love that Arthur wears bright reds and Uther and Morgana wear darker tones of red.

"How can you trust a man who's lied to you?" asks Uther, and the scene cuts to show Merlin.

Gaius and his books remind me of Giles.

The griffin attacks. Arthur leads his knights. "ON ME ! ON MEEEE". The show does a good job at establishing Arthur's skills as a fighter and leader of his knights, and his qualities such as his bravoury and sense of self-sacrifice.

I wish the show wouldn’t use so much slow motion during fight scenes...

"You said your knights were the best in the land, and you proved that today". So once again it goes to show that Arthur expects a high level of skills from his knights, but for a good reason.

Uther refusing to listen to reason even though it could cost him his son's life is sending me. Arthur will ride out against the creature because it is his duty to protect Camelot but also because his father ordered him to and he yearns for his father's approval and fears his disappointment.

"Merlin you are the only thing I care about in all this world. I would give my life for you without a thought", says Gaius, while obviously still being loyal to Uther somehow.

Arthur thinks he's been "so stupid" for believing in Lancelot and Merlin's lie. It's just the beginning...

"I need... Camelot needs" yeah Arthur just admit you like Lancelot and admire him, it's alright.

"It doesn't matter what I believe. The use of magic is not permitted".

Arthur gives Lancelot his freedom, in his father's back.

Sweet moment between Gwen and Lancelot. She might be developing her crush.

Ooooh right, Arthur and his knights were still wearing helmets that season.

They found a good option for Arthur, because helmets and filmmaking don't really go together (unless it's The Mandalorian), and this helmet protects the head but shows enough of the actor's face to let the viewer enjoy the acting and see the character's emotions.

"I'm failing, and if Arthur dies because I am not good enough..." Merlin's biggest fear.

How come both of Lancelot's shoulders are protected when Arthur is only protected on his right side ? ...it's purely decorative, isn’t it ?

Oh I didn’t expect the forest scene to be so close to the castle.

That's a nice horse Lancelot has. Totally epic sequence.

Arthur is so happy Lancelot managed to kill the griffin, oooooh.

Aw and Gaius is proud of Merlin... That's sweet. Also interesting to note he struggled to enchant a weapon now in season 1 but in the pilot he could stop time without thinking and in season 5 he can accomplish feats of magic like no one else can.

Who are these random people in the room with Uther, Arthur and the guards ? They are useless and shouldn't be here.

"He laid down his life for me ! He served with honour".

"The law is the law. The code bends for no man". "Then the code is wrong !" Arthur, my darling, I love to see you make your own conclusions and realise that your father is not right about everything. Keep turning into the great King you will be ❤️

Lancelot knows about Merlin's magic and accepts him.

Lancelot barging in to say goodbye... Dude, Arthur was fighting for you to be pardoned and reinstated as a knight. He liked you and wanted you to stay and he basically told you so. You don't have to sacrifice yourself all the damn time. Fight for what you want. You are too noble for your own good. YOU killed the griffin. You were the one who fought it and won. Merlin helped, but it doesn't mean that it is his accomplishment alone. It was team work.

Morgana's voice is softer this season than later. She and Gwen are sweet together.

Byyye Lancelot, see you later !

Okay, my conclusions :

Merlin is learning not to mess with other people's destiny, and learning new spells.

Arthur's skills and sense of honor were nicely shown, and he wasn't very prattish in this episode

Arthur is amused by people who defy him, like Merlin or Lancelot. Let him have real friends, pleaaaase.

So many ships were created by that episode.

Lancelot is too noble for his own good and I'm afraid that's what made him a bit boring to my eyes in later seasons.

Arthur is not afraid to go against his father and stand for what is right, he did it at least twice if not three times : by telling his father in denial that he thinks Gaius is right, by freeing Lancelot behind his father's back, and by going to see his father to demand to have Lancelot pardoned and restaured as a knight.

I don't expect perfect costuming (or even historical accuracy) from this show but a tiny bit more consistency and logic wouldn't have hurt. Fan artists and fashion historians, if you ever come this way... I'll take all the art of Merlin and Arthur and Morgana in the BEST outfits.

They've really pulled the knight/chivalry card in this ep and I loved it.

[steelycunt]

"do you defend him or is it more of an acceptance of how terrible he is"

s girl anon here to explain this!!

In my experience, it is an odd combination of both. I’m going to get really controversial rn but I don't think he's that terrible. in fact, I would go as far as to say he's redeemable and compelling and an overall good person who makes questionable decisions from time to time. hear me out!! I don't necessarily defend him as much as I explain his actions. exhibit A: the prank. I don't defend what he did but I do try to find angles that help me understand his thought process because I don't think he was purposely being malicious as much as just reckless, impulsive, misguided, and led by anger while also trying to be protective of people he cared about - which I don't think is as controversial of a take. that being said, I am simultaneously an s apologist sooo.

I'm about to go on a bit of tangent, so i'm sorry. these are my more self-centered reasons. I see a lot of myself in him and looking at him exposes flaws within myself. but at the same time it allows me to give myself some degree of grace. because, despite, or maybe because of, all of his flaws I love him and think he's a good person. his desperate desire to be good and a better version of himself is just so very compelling to me (and relatable. we all have aspects of ourselves that unintentionally harm others and we have to try to better ourselves while still staying true to who we are). you've said this before but being better is something that he has to actively and consciously try to do. I think I sometimes think that certain things should be effortless and easy and instinctual, but I also don't think that's actually true. sometimes the fact that you are putting in effort is just as meaningful. we are shown things like love at first sight and "found soulmates" and other things that are "predetermined", but in order for love to really flourish you have to choose to make an effort, which is very scary to me. and to him too, I think. but he tries and he's not always good at it. but he always has caring and gentle qualities that line his actions when dealing w people he loves. I struggle w being selfless so so much and it's something I really dislike about myself because it can occasionally hurt people I deeply care about. so whenever I catch myself trying to change that it makes me feel better because it indicates some sort of growth even though it doesn't come naturally to me, and he reminds me of those attempts at growth.

also, sirius' tendency to unintentionally hurt people he's close to by being careless and then regretting it immediately afterwards... it's like looking in a mirror. he wants to be separated from his family and hold no similarities to them but he also struggle's with having shared characteristics that he sometimes doesn't even realize are there until he fucks up massively. and when he does he tries to get them out of his system but struggles. that desperation to prove himself after wake-up calls is just soooo real. I understand his regret and desire to be forgiven. frustration when that takes time and it seems as though his efforts are useless. that occasionally shifting into anger but then settling back into sorrow and deep-rooted regret while also having hints of self-pity. like I just am so obsessed with him. I understand him so much that it just makes me want to give him a hug even when he's fucked up. and I know that is not something you can relate to but when he's (rightfully) being shit on by other characters for his actions I just picture myself hugging him and telling him I know he can do better yknow? like, I just want to encourage him to keep trying.

I don't know if i'm making sense and I will probably come up w more reasons why I love him later, but I think for now this will do.

sometimes I look back at things i've done and ask myself "would sirius have done this" and usually when the answer is yes it correlates to it being something that got me into a lot of trouble. but oh well <3

anyway, I love this discourse ridi. I love hearing you talk about these two, you get them and your blog is one of my fav things ever. it makes me v happy and I will try to keep sending you snoopy/muppet-related things I see <333

hi!! im going to respond under the cut just because i sense i will have a rather rambling answer!!

first of all--for the record & For the Public (rather than in response to anything you've said specifically, anon) i want to clarify that i actually love s as a character. the cartoonish sort of dislike i pretend to harbour towards him on here is just an exaggerated little joke. i think he (and when i talk about him i'm referring more to the fan development of his character than the rather basic canon foundations) is a super complex and compelling character, but he's also posh and handsome and it makes me giggle to hate on him for that. i wouldn't write s as much as i do if i actually disliked his character, nor would i read him.

having established that!! i completely agree with everything you say here. obviously discussing certain bits of him (e.g. his relationship with r) we're inevitably going to veer away from objective canon and into subjective hc territory but...i dont think he's that terrible, to start. i think he's a bit reckless and jealous and has a rather volatile, dangerous temper that can make him capable of cruelty at times. ive spoken about this a lot before under my #s tag so i wont go into it too much here, but have exactly the same view of the prank as you do in as much as it was a poorly thought-out, impulsive act of anger rather than proof that he's an intentionally malicious person.

i think (and maybe this gets lost amongst my jokes) that he is a fundamentally good person. and as you said i think its all about the fact that he is trying and he continues to try, even if there are setbacks here and there. i absolutely adore writing him and specifically i adore writing him when he is trying, i love writing him when he's being sweet and gentle with r (and that isnt just because i think r deserves that sort of treatment as you say teehee <3) and i hope but dont necessarily assume that comes across in my writing/my answers to asks such as these, and that it seems like i handle his character with care and detail!! because i do try to!! i think the sort of hc-developed version of him that we're talking about here (because i think from the way you talk about him we characterise him very similarly) is a very real character and its not that aspect of him--which i can completely understand resonating with people--that i love to hate as much as it is the poshness and the prettiness. i think for his ego's sake that since he is the coolest guy in the room there should be at least one person (me) there to boo and humble him xx

anyway!! that's all really. s is so so fun for me to talk about and write about so thank you so much for your insight!! and for being so sweet!! i hope what i've said here sort of makes sense!! i love snoopy + muppet related things and i love YOU!! mwah!!

[alienidentities-f22a]

REVISED: Character Analysis: Max

Max Evans, in the science-fiction series, Roswell, New Mexico, unites the people of Roswell in various ways and exists to allow comfort for the viewers. With his siblings, Isobel and Micheal, Max serves as the glue. The psychic connection between Isobel and Max allows the two to understand each other's feelings and emotions. The connection of the trio doesn’t falter although Michael does not share the same connection as his two siblings. Not only does Max care for both of his siblings, but also for the town of Roswell. By serving as a police officer, Max enforces the law but also protects the people around him. The most important person to him, however, continues to be Liz. His love for her never falters and he remains protective over her in every situation throughout the show. Due to Max’s selflessness and caring nature, he serves as the patron of the town and safe haven for me during worrisome parts of the show. 

In the very first episode, “Pilot”, Max protects Liz in the diner when shots fire through the window. Not only does he risk his own life by using his powers to save her, but also his siblings who would later be exposed due to Max’s decision. Although this causes tension between Max and his siblings in the first couple of episodes, he did the right thing by saving Liz, his one true love. Max religiously gives his all to Liz, however, Liz fails to see how much Max loves her in the first few episodes. She assumes very quickly that since Max is an alien, he killed Rosa, Liz’s sister. Even though this is not the case, she resents Max due to her wrong assumption. Max proves his care for Liz when he trusts her with the information about his family’s past. He gives her this private information about himself, deals with the rage from his siblings, and then is faced with the fact that she ran to tell Kyle his secret. Even after being disrespected in this way, Max still continues to care for Liz. Similarly, Max also goes through another difficult point of forgiveness when he finds out that Isobel sent Liz away when Rosa died. Not only does Max quickly forgive Liz for telling Kyle his secret but then has to quickly forgive his siblings for keeping a huge secret from him for almost ten years. 

Since Max “cared too deeply” for Liz, his siblings decided to use Isobel’s mind compulsion to send Liz away so that Max did not have to see Liz in such a depressive state of mind. Additionally, they both hid this fact from Max for years, making him believe that Liz abandoned him. Although this broke Max when he found out, he forgave his siblings and continued to protect them especially when Isobel lost sight of her own identity. Being the protective big brother that he is, Max continued to prove his love for Isobel in every possible way. At her darkest point, Isobel sought help, and Max, of course, was there for her. Growing up with only Isobel and Michael as family, Max was required to step up as the “father figure” and provide comfort for his siblings. In season one, episode eight, viewers see Isobel get violently ill. As soon as Isobel injected herself with Liz’s serum, Max felt “cold.” Isobel, believing that she diminished her powers for good, began to feel ill causing this “cold” feeling in Max. As soon as he knew something was wrong with his sister, he came to her rescue. Despite making himself sick, Max continued to try to heal Isobel with all the power he contained. In this process of attempting to save Isobel, the viewers undergo every emotion that Max also endures. Although this moment leaves viewers stressed, Max’s presence provides a sense of security because of how loyal he remains to others in the show. In this, we are constantly relieved to see Max on the screen because he continuously helps with his powers instead of hurting. 

Born to heal, Max continues to use his power only to assist others, proving his loyalty to the town of Roswell and its inhabitants. In order to protect his family, however, Max would have to take things out of his comfort zone. In episode six, “Smells Like Team Spirit”, glimpses of an overwhelmed and heartbroken Max appear when he is forced to use his powers to cover up “Isobel’s” murder of Rosa and her two friends. Not only does Max express immense regret but also floods his mind with thoughts of Liz and how badly his actions would one day hurt her. Although we see quickly how Max goes above and beyond for the people he loves, he continues to do the most for his family. While experiencing intense and heavy blackouts Max remains by Isobel’s side and risks it all to provide her comfort and security. In the episode “Songs About Texas” when Isobel is in the pod and Liz is working hard to provide an antidote for her symptoms, Max goes daily to read to his sister. In times of despair, I find Max in order to feel better about the situation at hand. Although Max’s loyalties lie with his siblings, Isobel and Micheal, as season one progresses, the stress of finding out “the killer’s” identity consumes Max, causing him to act out towards his siblings. 

Due to Max’s desire to keep him and his sibling’s ultimate secret, Micheal feels as though “hiding” from the truth of who they truly are suppresses his identity. This tension between the brothers causes Max and Micheal to lash out at one another as we see clearly in episode eleven, “Champagne Supernova”. Max says, “No one made you follow my rule Micheal. I’m not your dad.” This line indicates passive aggression towards his brother and proves that Max feels hurt by Micheal’s unappreciativeness towards him when he simply meant to protect his family. Micheal then follows Max’s aggression with, “You sure as hell been acting like it all our lives.” This interaction highlights the ongoing resentment that Micheal has developed for Max over the years following Max’s lead. As the scene continues, Max finally breaks and expresses how he has always felt guilty for being adopted and having a real family. Finally, Max confesses how he continuously pushed away his mom and resented her for not also adopting Micheal. The sad and long-awaited truth comes out when Max tells Micheal that he has always been his top priority. On top of all the family stress, Max endured he also has not stopped searching for the killer. This breakdown shows Max falling into an overwhelming state of anxiety as he tries to mend the bond with his brother while also managing to solve the mystery of the unknown killer. Ultimately, in an attempt to kill Noah, the “unknown” killer, the tension between Max and Micheal will be their demise. 

Not only does Max grow more confident throughout the season, but also more aware of his own identity. As he becomes more conscious of the danger he and his siblings are in, he takes control of his emotions and uses his anger toward Noah to take revenge. The toughest version of Max comes out in episode twelve, “Creep”, when Isobel, Liz, and Max interrogate Noah. Instead of having the “nice guy” act on, he turns into someone Noah fears and this is exactly Max’s plan. In the end, Max proves to be the hometown hero and essentially saves Roswell from Noah and his malicious intentions. Max not only uses an excessive amount of power to kill Noah but also to bring back Rosa. This action clearly indicates his immense love for Liz and is proof of his selflessness. He does both of these things for the people he loves and ends up killing himself. 

Throughout the entirety of season one, Max stayed true to his morals and is loyal to his people. Although this immense love for others killed him, he died doing what he knew was right. In dying, he saved someone special to the person he loved most, Liz. Potentially not having Max is a terrifying thought for the future season but his character will always live on in the viewers’ hearts. Max served as a comfortable character for many and viewers always could count on him to make the right decisions for others. 

[logicalbookthief]

Christmas Movies Ranked by How Anti-Capitalist They Are

It’s a Wonderful Life

Movies that make you want to pick a fight with the 1% and also weep with joy. Absolutely a classic and anti-capitalist at its very core. Will convince you we need to start oppressing landlords again.

“Just remember this, Mr. Potter, that this rabble you're talking about... they do most of the working and paying and living and dying in this community. Well, is it too much to have them work and pay and live and die in a couple of decent rooms and a bath? Anyway, my father didn't think so. People were human beings to him. But to you, a warped, frustrated old man, they're cattle.”

SAY THAT!!! George Bailey said fuck landlords, all my homies hate landlords, they have NO rights. Local man believes poor people are human, dedicates his life to helping them, and in his time of the need literally the whole town comes together to support him and his family. Class solidarity ftw!

“Remember no man is a failure who has friends.” Bitch I CRY EVERY GODDAMN TIME. 

10/10

Home Alone

Soundtrack goes hard, the wacky hijinks even harder. 

Loses points because the bandits had a prime opportunity to seize and redistribute some of the wealth from this ritzy Chicago neighborhood and instead they focus their energy on trying to kill an 8-year-old who outsmarts them at every turn.

2/10

Elf

A family favorite in our house. Touches on the overworking and mistreatment of employees through Greenway Press – Walter forced to choose between being with his family on Christmas Eve or losing his job, it’s implied Deb has a pet grooming business on the side to makes ends meet despite being a receptionist at a NY publishing company, etc.

Honestly most of the points come from Jonie’s underrated yet highly relatable storyline. She works in retail, exhausted and cynical towards the high-paced Christmas season which gives her little to no relief or reward, since she’s surviving on ramen noodles and using the employee showers because her water was cut off. Not expanded on enough to be considered a true Marxist piece but the effort is appreciated.

5/10

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Although the meme is correct in that Rudolph’s red nose becomes desirable only once it proves to be useful, it does get points for exposing the harmful nature of forced conformity and those alienated by these capitalist ideals -- Rudolph, Hermie, the island of misfit toys -- are given a place to belong despite the perceived “flaws” that before made them undesirable.

Also the elves definitely have a free dental-plan now thanks to Hermie and are hopefully on their way to unionizing. Fucking superb you funky little misfit.

6/10

Klaus (2019)

Turns a member of the bourgeoisie into a man I’d trust to carry my mail. Respect for postal workers this movie contains was ahead of its time.

 No direct takedown of the establishment but a heartwarming message -- “A true selfless act always sparks another” bITCH I may be crying -- that emphasizes the importance of giving to others even when there is no selfish motivation to do so, which is inherently anti-capitalist.  

8/10

The Santa Clause

Scott Calvin starts as a toy executive who takes part in the commercialization of Christmas. He was probably a business major so automatically loses points.

The Santa dynasty itself seems to operate under the cutthroat rules of the business world where you must overthrow (or in this case, throw him off the roof) the former CEO in order to seize power. 

Elves have not unionized or seized the means of production by the end.

0/10

A Christmas Carol 

THE ORIGINAL. Charles Dickens was not even in the neighborhood of fucking around with this one. CREATED the anti-capitalist Christmas genre!!

Rich man treats his employees like shit and gets terrorized by three ghosts on Christmas Eve. Force him to redistribute his wealth by dragging him through a montage of his most epic fails -- oh, hey, remember when your fiancé left you? -- and make him listen as all his employees and relatives complain about his stingy ass. 

They end this slideshow by throwing this dude into his own grave. DIRECT ACTION. 

Like damn, the ghosts really said, “If you hoard your resources and ignore those in need when you could directly improve/save lives with no cost to yourself, you will die ALONE and you WILL pay for your crimes in hell.” Literally watching this movie is a catharsis for anyone who is or has been poor and working class. 

I’m including all versions of this movie but a special shout out to the Muppet version because it fucks the hardest. 

100/10

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

Listen I’m not even in realms of joking with this one. This movie is THE anti-capitalist film of the holiday season. 

WhoVille commercializing Christmas and a fixation on consumer culture to the point where anything and anyONE who cannot be commodified -- aka the GRINCH -- is alienated? The Whos rediscovering that people should be cherished over material items once it all is stolen and they must confront how empty the holiday has become??

Cindy Lou becoming disillusioned in Christmas -- at an age that coincides when many children (those who celebrate Christmas at least) lost belief in Santa and had to wrestle with what the holiday means with the magic gone and they’re more aware of the rampant consumerism that taints the season?? Her resolve to find a meaning that goes beyond material consumption because if a holiday founded on goodwill doesn’t extend that goodwill to everyone, even those society deems undesirable, then what’s the point???

The Grinch despising Christmas because he is unable to participate and isolated from the Whos and also the better qualities within himself? His alienation serving to demonize him further as it allows the public to narrow his valid criticisms of the holiday down to him being different and thus inherently predisposed to evil?? And hmm isn’t it interesting that a LOT of this demonization comes via Mayor Augustus “generously paid for by the tax-payers of Whoville” Maywho, Mr. 1% himself.

The upper vs working class divide evident in the light show competition between Martha May and Betty Lou Who?? The opening scene of the shopping frenzy that mirrors our own consumerist culture and overworking of retail/poster workers??? This entire monologue:

“That's what it's all about, isn't it? That's what it's always been about. Gifts, gifts... gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts, gifts! You wanna know what happens to your gifts? They all come to me. In your garbage. You see what I'm saying? In your garbage. I could hang myself with all the bad Christmas neckties I found at the dump. And the avarice... the avarice never ends! ‘I want golf clubs. I want diamonds. I want a pony so I can ride it twice, get bored and sell it to make glue.’" 

MARXIST KING. MENTION IT ALL.

1000/10

[makeste]

I like Bakuguo but his attitude is starting to really piss me off. He's talking about Daku as if he's just ~crazy~ and as if he isn't partly to blame for Deku's toxic self-worth issues. It's infuriating to watch. If Bakuguo doesn’t admit out loud and in front of his friends that his bullying of Deku played a part in Deku's current destructive state and if he doesn’t verbally apologize and reaffirm Deku's worth then I can no longer like Bakuguo's character or Hori's writing.

tbh I don't really know why this is the discourse of choice for people all of a sudden, but this is already the second ask I've gotten about it, so I might as well address it lol.

I think fandom is conflating fanon!Deku and canon!Deku here again. fanon Deku is of course much more sensitive and woobified and has much shakier self-esteem. fanon Deku is the one that turns evil in so many AUs because of Kacchan's bullying. fanon Deku is the one that actually jumps off the roof in so many fics, as opposed to fishing his notebook back out of the pond a few minutes later grumbling about how Kacchan needs to think before he speaks or else he could land himself in serious shit one day if god forbid anyone actually does take his cruel words to heart.

and just to clarify before I get any further, I am not saying this to excuse Kacchan's actions in any way, because what he did was still completely terrible and unacceptable and WAY over the line, and what's more he knew it, too. the bullying was still shitty and horrible and awful, and definitely impacted Deku and made him miserable. I fully acknowledge that, and that Kacchan has a lot of atoning to do for it. this is not a "Kacchan did nothing wrong" post.

but that being said, I don't think canon Deku's reckless self-sacrificing nature actually has anything to do with the bullying. I think they're two completely separate things. canon Deku actually has pretty decent self-esteem in spite of everything Kacchan did to him. canon Deku doesn't think he is useless. canon Deku had a wholeass fight with Kacchan less than 10 chapters into the series in which he explicitly spelled it out for Kacchan that he had a lot of worth, and was going to prove it to him. canon Deku was persistent in wanting to become a hero and hoping and believing that he could find some way in spite of being quirkless. canon Deku never let go of that dream even when no one else supported it. I don't think he would have even given up on it after being told no by All Might, tbh -- we just never got to see how it would have played out because of everything that happened with the sludge monster shortly afterward. but he's not the type to ever give up on something that easily, and we've seen that. canon Deku never thought he was useless, but rather wanted to prove to everyone else that he wasn't.

the drive that Deku has to save and protect others even at the expense of his own safety is something entirely separate from that. he doesn't break his body for others simply because he has no self-esteem and thinks that his own life isn't important. he does it because he can't stand the thought of someone else getting hurt, and knowing that he could have done something to prevent it. it's as simple as that. like, Spider-Man has the whole "with great power comes great responsibility" thing, right? and he doesn't have low self-esteem; he simply believes that if he has the ability to help someone else, then he has a responsibility to help them. it's a personal creed. and Deku is based on Spider-Man. his philosophy is based on that philosophy, which was one of Horikoshi's core influences and is one of the core creeds in superhero fiction.

Deku is self-destructive not because he doesn't value himself, but because he is literally physically incapable of standing back and doing nothing if he knows that he can do something. he's the type of person who sees a car speeding towards someone and leaps in to push them out of the way. NOT because he wants to get himself fucking pancaked by a speeding car, but simply because he can't sit back and watch the other person get hurt without taking action. his body moves before he can think. and that's where the whole "doesn't take himself into account" thing comes in -- the fact that his thought process simply stops at "get them out of the way of the car", and never extends beyond that to "hey, and maybe I should try to find a way to do this that doesn't involve me getting hit in their place." to him, that's simply less important than the first priority, which is getting the other person out of the way.

and regarding that last part, while that may seem like a self-worth issue if he's prioritizing everyone else above himself, I think what it actually is just selflessness taken to extremes. like for instance, when a parent sacrifices themselves to save their child, them placing the child's life above their own isn't necessarily because they don't see themselves as having value. rather, it's that they love the child so much that they place their well-being even above their own. and that's what Deku is like as well. except that in his case he cares about EVERYONE, and so is willing to sacrifice himself for anyone. and that selflessness is his defining character trait, and simultaneously the most admirable and the most terrifying thing about him. it's both his greatest strength and his greatest weakness, which I think is fascinating to explore.

but anyway, so that's also why we never really see anyone thoroughly chewing him out for this behavior either. because the thing is, it is admirable how selfless he is. it's just that there's also a reason why most people are at least a little bit selfish. and that's because too much selflessness will ultimately and inevitably wind up getting you killed. at some point you either have to learn when to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, or else find yourself a loyal group of friends (or classmates) to watch your back, and make sure that mask gets on you when you need it. and maybe help you land the plane too while they're at it.

anyway so that was a lot of rambling, but basically it all boils down to three things:

when Deku berates himself for being useless (for instance at the end of the War arc), he's doing it out of frustration for not being able to push the others out of the way of the metaphorical car. that's the kind of uselessness he can't stand. the sitting-back-and-doing-nothing uselessness.

Kacchan's bullying was terrible, and it might have indeed played a part in Deku's choice of the word "useless" as a way of berating himself in these instances, but he is not the one who gave Deku this mindset of taking himself out of the equation. that's something that was already inherent to Deku from day one. (but that said, Kacchan has a lot of things to apologize to Deku for anyway, so if he wants to add this to the list I certainly won't stop him. he gets mad about Deku's suicidal attitude because it worries him, but that doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't feel responsible for it. people underestimated his feelings of atonement before 284/285, and I think they're still underestimating him now.)

and lastly, one last important note, which is that Deku's current "saving" mindset isn't wrong, just as Kacchan's "winning" mindset was not wrong either. the lesson to be learned here is NOT that being selfless and wanting to save other people is bad. rather, it's the fact that he's trying to do it alone that's got him all fucked up right now. basically when you think about it, selflessness is really just selfishness on someone else's behalf. which means that in order for Deku to be saved, it isn't necessary for him to change his outlook or his selfless attitude, even if it is pretty crazy lol. rather, all he really needs is a good group of friends who are willing to act selfishly on his behalf in return. protecting each other through mutual selflessness lol. teamwork as self-preservation. hence why the U.A. kids are here now.

anyway so yeah, I think that's everything. sorry this got so long and out of control lol. this is just a very specific nuanced thing that's hard for me to express, but which I feel is very important when it comes to Deku's character. Kacchan didn't unleash Depressed Nomad Deku on the world (or at least not in this respect). but that being said, he and the others will hopefully be the ones to nudge him back on the right course again.

[atlasshrugd]

There is something so powerful about a being made for evil, from evil - and choosing to defy his own nature - over someone who had humanity forced upon him.

I am not saying this distinction is not complicated, but it just hit me. Vampires are inherently evil creatures. They are born to do one thing: kill humans, suck their blood, make more vampires. The fact that there is a normal vampire (who, like all other vampires, has no soul) chooses to strive for humanity and light, is actually insane. Not to say that he succeeds in this striving, or that he doesn’t fail and disappoint sometimes - but the fact that that desire is there is something else.

Spike’s desire to change is first rooted in selfish motivations. He realises he loves Buffy, the Slayer, who kills his kind, which is doomed from the beginning. He knows from the start she will, and cannot, ever love him (“a man’s still gotta try”). He still tries to get in her favour, by helping her and the scoobies whenever he is called, looking after/entertaining Dawn and Joyce, taking care of disaster victims in the fallout. At first, he does all these things to “prove” to buffy that he can be better, and that his love for Buffy is changing him. This is a selfish motivation, born out of his desire for Buffy’s love; not out of his desire to be a better man.

But that desire eventually starts to morph into a genuine care. Spike begins to care for Buffy’s family, in separation from her. He cares about Dawn, and helps her to try and get her mum back, without wanting to tell Buffy. He brings flowers for Joyce’s funeral without a card, because he liked the woman (“She didn’t treat me like a freak” / “She was decent. Didn’t put on airs.” He becomes the primary guardian for Dawn in the 6 months after Buffy’s death. Buffy was not around to witness these things, and his reasons for doing them was not to gain “favour” from Buffy, as he would in the past. He is a soulless thing, created purely out of darkness and for the machinations of evil - yet despite all that, he chooses to do good without reward. Not all the time, but in the times that count. His desire to change is, at some point, not just rooted in gaining Buffy’s love for himself - but out of genuine, selfless care for who she is, and what she loves.

This is, however, not consistent. After season 5 and early s6, Spike seems to revert back into that selfishness that he was actually able to transcend. Instead of trying to be better, he tries to get Buffy to join him, because he believes that there is a huge part of her she is rejecting, and that is the part that desires him. Again, Spike takes advantage of Buffy’s depersonalisation and emotional confusion to serve his desires, which is - to have Buffy, in whatever way he can have her. For a while, this is enough, until he realises that he not only wants Buffy’s body and her lust - he wants all of her. He wants her to love him back, to see him, and to allow herself to do that. When she doesn’t, and can’t, he cannot understand, and this perpetual hurt continues to fester until it unleashes itself in vicious desperation. He hurts Buffy, he reacts in the only way he knows how and that he has spent centuries acclimating to, and he does it all out of selfishness. Need. Want. Pain.

And that makes him search for the one thing that could make Buffy potentially love him: his soul. The nature of his journey for the soul is also primarily selfish. He wants to give Buffy what she deserves, to be a man she could love, to be a kind of man. He goes through all this to have a chance of her forgiveness and, maybe but unlikely, her love. But when he receives what he has fought for, it doesn’t turn out the way he expects.

With his soul, he is plagued with perpetual guilt and self-loathing. He can barely live with himself, for all he’s done. All the emotions that have been suppressed by the demon are coming back. But when he comes back to Sunnydale - he is not that different. He didn’t get an entire personality transplant. His desires and principles have not changed. He is still Spike (as opposed to Angel and Angelus being two completely different people).

That means that the soul did not give him anything he didn’t already have. It just removed the blockage. Spike already had humanity in him, but it was not allowed to manifest unless through selfish reasons (except for those times when he blatantly fought against his nature). But the fact that Spike is not so different with/without a soul is actually more significant. Souled Spike still wants Buffy. He still loves her. He would still do anything for her, including kill. That has not changed, but the reasons behind it have changed. He loves Buffy not because he wants her or because he can’t have her, but because of what and who she is. He will continue loving her and striving to be a man who could deserve her even if she didn’t reciprocate, even if she didn’t love him back or give him her body. That is the fundamental difference between Spike with and without a soul. His love and desires are all still there, but they have become primarily selfless, as opposed to primarily selfish.

Spike still enjoys killing, but only evil things. He takes no pleasure in hurting/killing innocents, but he would take pleasure in killing an evil human (for example, Warren). Whereas Buffy could never conceive killing a human, regardless of how evil they are. This proves how Spike did not change his tune. He changed his channel.

This is why Spike is such a fascinating and rewarding character to watch. His relationship with Buffy is extremely messy, and often painful to watch, and not without its detrimental errors. He is not a fundamentally good person. He is, technically, not a person at all, but a creature born out of darkness, animated for evil purposes alone. But he defies all that - I guess, in true Spike fashion. He defies his very nature (that is, the nature of vampires), and he embraces his real nature: his humanity. He is not supposed to feel emotions like love, empathy, guilt, or remorse - but he does. He is primarily selfish, but he tries not to be (at least in late s5/early s6). And that is more moving to me than becoming a good person when cursed with a soul.

This makes him an extraordinary character in reflection to Buffy, and why I find shipping them so fulfilling.

[o-king-of-suns]

“exceeds his own”

I never realized that there is SO much toxicity in the AoT shipping community till  recently when I joined some social media platforms and saw how awful it can get. I also never thought that I will be involved in these stupid shipping wars till I saw how shippers, intentionally or unintentionally, twist Levi’s character to make him something that he is not. I never particularly minded any ship; I actually liked all the ships that included Levi (because I love Levi). It was all fun and games till I saw the horrible takes on Levi’s character and actions by shippers who care about nothing but try to prove something about their ship that isn’t there. So, I decided to rant about it here and I will post regularly about some of the controversial opinions that are circulated around when it comes to Levi and his relationships with some of the other characters.

In today’s post I will be talking about one of the famous lines that some people like to crop out of context, circulate around, and use it as some kind of proof for the validity of their ship. 

It’s the famous line where Isayama said that, to Levi  “Erwin’s  life exceeds his own”

This line gets passed around in the AoT shipping community as if it has some kind of romantic implications when it absolutely doesn’t! Some fans are naive enough to believe it and  they don’t even bother to check the interview.

Isayama said that the reason Levi always operates alongside Erwin is because he interpreted Erwin’s “For Humanity’s Future” as an altruistic intention that Levi never considered himself, so Levi ends up adopting it as his own life’s mission.” Levi always viewed and idolized Erwin as this selfless, altruistic visionary that he could never dream to become like. Not just him, almost everyone in the SC did. Erwin just had this power over people. Erwin showed Levi something that he lacked in himself and that’s why Levi trusted him blindly. Moreover, the reason Levi trusted Erwin so much is that Erwin could come up with schemes and strategies whereas Levi was really just exceptional at fighting. Without someone with strategic intelligence, Levi wouldn't know what to do, couldn't be pointed at the right targets. So trusting Erwin is partially based on Erwin's proven talents, but also partially based on necessity. Levi has to trust someone, has to believe someone else sees how to achieve the bigger picture. Levi himself admits that he’s no strategist in one of the chapters, but I can’t remember which chapter exactly. 

This is what Isayama meant when he said that "Erwin's existence exceeds" Levi's in one of his interviews. He also said, IN THE SAME INTERVIEW, that Levi’s trust in Erwin started to slowly change when he started doubting Erwin's true motivations. It first happened when Erwin smiled when they realized that titans might actually be humans and I'm quoting from the interview: “prior to this, he never actually recognized Erwin’s true nature, and thought Erwin’s existence exceeded his own.” He THOUGHT  it did, but he later started to realize that  Erwin's intentions aren't as "altruistic" as he thought they were. I can’t emphasize on the word  THOUGHT enough.

Initially, Levi didn’t analyze Erwin’s reactions any deeper and thought it has to do with Erwin just being mysterious, but Isayama said:  “But in volume 18, while facing an Erwin who wanted to command the mission no matter what - and could not be persuaded otherwise - Levi had to become a little angry.

The reason to why Levi was insistent on having Erwin stay behind  is because he believed that Erwin staying behind would have benefited them/humanity more than being dead because there was a huge possibility that this would happen since Erwin is unable to fight with just one arm. I’m sure that Levi worried for his safety as well (that’s how a good friend Levi is), but,as Isayama said, he also felt  ANGRY because Erwin’s true motivations weren’t clear to him and his decision to join the battle might lead to undesirable consequences. 

Isayama: His line of “I’ll trust your judgment, then” actually also contains a tinge of “If anything happens, you will have to take responsibility.” 

And it’s because Levi is such a good judge of people’s characters and a TRULY kind and compassionate man,during the battle, when Erwin talked about his dream of going basement, Levi quickly accepted Erwin’s child-like side (even though he felt betrayed as Isayama said) and helped assure him that they wouldn’t have reached that far if it weren’t for Erwin. It’s because of Levi’s words that Erwin became a adult who prioritizes his responsibilities over his dreams. Levi constantly does this with EVERYONE. He comforted Hange when they thought were responsible for Sannes death. He constantly motivates them. He comforted Armin when he killed a human for the first time ad assured him that if it weren’t for his decision, Jean would’ve died and he’s grateful for that. He also comforted Jean when he told him that not to beat himself up and not think back when he hesitated to kill the enemy. He did this with Eren MANY times. He quickly forgave Kenny for abandoning him. He quickly forgave Mikasa for almost killing him. He forgave Eren for disobeying him. He forgave Erwin for not being completely honest with him. This is how wonderful Levi is.

Levi is a wonderful character with complex motivations and a person who deeply cares about his comrades and friends, and to reduce him to a love interest is just NOT OK

[aminiatureworld]

Burden

Characters: Xiao, gn!reader

Word Count: 2,261

Warnings: None

Premise: Xiao fell in love with your goodness, with your selflessness and generosity towards others. Perhaps, however, in doing so he had misunderstood your own complexities.

In which the reader feels they are a burden.

Author’s Note: I feel like I should note that there are going to be some relatively extreme emotions, mostly negative. I don’t feel like it’s enough or specific enough to be given a warning, but if anyone wants to tell me to tag it for something I will gladly. That being said I’m pretty proud of this one

Xiao

Ever since your first interaction you had been helping Xiao. It had seemed so natural, even then, even when nothing seemed natural about interacting with a human, those strange people from who Xiao must always be separated. Yet there you were, asking if this perfect stranger was alright. And there Xiao was, suddenly seeing his world opening up before him.

Perhaps it was for this reason that your relationship had developed in the way it had. To Xiao your selflessness, your never ending kindness, the fact that you would stop to help someone regardless of circumstance, all of that was normal. It was innate in your personality, and perhaps that was why Xiao never questioned what effect having that kind of personality might have on you. It is easy to assume that a kind and selfless person is also one with a short memory. After all, how could they stand it otherwise?

So when the first, barely noticeable, traces of that burden which Xiao saw so often began to swirl around you the yaksha’s initial reaction was that of utter panic. Was this not the exact reason that Xiao had chosen to disconnect himself from humanity? Was this not proof, right before him, that the chains he carried could not be contained. Though Xiao generally thought of humans as vaguely useless, deserving of protection because Rex Lapis proclaimed it be so, the idea of harming any one of them with the legacy of his own sins, it was something that he could never stomach, no matter how many times he feigned apathy. That you should be the person upon who his burdens should be transferred, how could he bear it?

Of course a small, more logical, part of him urged the adeptus to stop and think. The miasma that Xiao attracted in such high concentration was everywhere, and humans were not exempt from this burden by themselves. After all, did humanity not channel great evil as well as good? Did not the most ordinary human, dejected by their lot in life, become swarmed by little wisps of evil? Yet those were other, ordinary humans. Ordinary humans couldn’t understand the sheer capability to love that you seemed to possess. No, if Xiao could sense such a miasma around you then it was surely his fault.

Still the idea of leaving you was something quite painful to Xiao, to the adeptus who had so recently learned what it meant to love someone wholeheartedly. He told himself that it was best to leave immediately, best to disappear with the wind and never look back. Yet a part of him couldn’t seem to bear the idea; and that was the part that won out as Xiao approached you later in the day, as if in a desperate last attempt to prove himself wrong.

“Are you alright?”

“Xiao!” You jumped slightly, having evidently been lost in thought. Smiling widely you shook your head. “Of course I’m alright! Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I…” Xiao paused for a moment as the idea of telling you what was going on flitted through his head. Almost immediately the thought was squashed. After all, would the knowledge not worry you more? “I was just asking.”

“Well thank you Xiao, it’s very kind of you to think of me.”

“It’s my duty.”

“Still,” your smile never faltered. “You deserve thanks for what you do nonetheless.”

Xiao tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach, tried to block out the emotions that crashed over him like great waves as you leaned in to give him a soft kiss on the cheek. Was this not a good thing? After all, if Xiao was what cause this miasma to float around you, then was that not your salvation? Xiao knew how easy it was to drown in the burdens that one must shoulder. He knew how easy it was for humans to sink to the bottom of their despair and never once more emerge for water. Why should it not be a blessing that you would never have to fight to keep your head up, to keep yourself from a life full of burdens? Why, why did it hurt so much?

During the night, Xiao would leave during the night. After all, you deserved one last evening of happiness, if the yaksha could even believe that he brought you happiness. Or maybe it was for his sake that he refused to leave before the world was plunged into darkness. Maybe it was simply that Xiao could no longer imagine a world without you, and that such nightmares came out easier at night. Lying on top of the roof, eyes closed, ears focused on the familiar tread of your feet, Xiao willed himself not to think. He could regret when he was far away from you, when you were once more safe. For now he could only follow that ritual which had so long kept him sane, kept him from joining his brethren. For now he thought only of the contract he had once made.

The sound of your feet on the ground below came all too soon, as the sun finally began its descent across the heavens in earnest. Keeping his eyes closed, as if to stall the darkness for a little longer, Xiao took a deep breath in. He needed to steel himself for this evening; if not, well, Xiao had no wish to cry for the first time in a millennia.

Only once these thoughts finished flitting around in his head did the yaksha finally recognize the change in your footfall. Usually you were very light on your feet, dashing this way and that, stopping to ask Goldet or Yanxiao some mundane question, inquiring after the old lady who had basically set up permanent residence on the bottom floor of the Inn. This time, however, you seemed to drag, as if you were indeed carrying something very heavy. Alarm flashing through him, Xiao willed himself into perfect stillness. He wished to hear more, wished to understand what had caused such a change in you.

What he certainly hadn’t expected was the labored breathing of someone seconds away from tears.

The moment Xiao heard the door to your room close the sobbing began in earnest. Though you certainly seemed to be trying your hardest to hide your tears the sound of your muffled sobs rang through Xiao like a siren, flaring up every bit of alarm he had to offer. Jumping off of the roof Xiao catapulted his way through the hallways of the Inn, not bothering to hide his presence to the few, very confused, residents that were out. Reaching your room he didn’t allow himself a moment’s hesitation before grabbing the knob and opening the door.

Your head snapped up, eyes a mixture of dark emotions as you stared at him. For a moment you seemed ready to flee, to run and hide somewhere, or perhaps to throw him out. However almost immediately you seemed to sink back into yourself, and though Xiao could still sense your distress, at least the initial shock of his arrival seemed to have passed as quickly as it would otherwise.

“Xiao! I, I didn’t expect you. I, could, could you leave? I don’t, I don’t want, I don’t want to be seen right now.” It was all you could get out before another round of sobs wracked through your body.

Trying to remember what you had done for so many people, for himself, Xiao grabbed the pitcher that sat at one of the tables in the room. Pouring some water into a glass he crept towards you as softly as possible, hoping that he could convey his worries in these odd, brusque actions. He knew that he didn’t have the talent you had to comfort people, knew that all his gestures of kindness inevitably came out cramped and awkward. Nevertheless he shoved the glass into your hands, staring just past you as you tentatively downed the water. Taking the glass from you Xiao then reached out one of his palms to you. His relief when you placed your own palm on top of his was indescribable.

“I guess you probably would like an explanation,” you rasped out.

Xiao said nothing, waiting for you to act on your own. If he knew anything the yaksha knew that attempting to force the truth out of anyone would never worked. Hadn’t his own years as a pariah taught him that.

“It’s just,” you finally continued, taking in deep, labored breaths. “It’s just so hard. It’s so hard Xiao, I can’t stand it anymore!”

“Stand it?”

“Stand the… the hurt!”

Your eyes filled with tears, and you went to grab the handkerchief that you left on your nightstand. You always needed one with you, as your eyes stung terribly whenever you began to cry. Xiao said nothing as you sobbed once more, only moving to draw small circles on the back of your hand with his thumb.

“It hurts so much, to see other people. To hear their problems. Not that it’s their fault, or that I don’t want to help them. I do, I really do. I look at all the people suffering near me and I just want to take all their burdens and give it to myself, after all they don’t deserve all their sufferings. But it’s so hard Xiao, it’s so hard to take on people’s burdens, even a little bit. And I feel so selfish when I think that, so selfish and so worthless. How can I say that? But it’s true, it’s really, really true. And when I think about that, when I think about all the other people suffering worse than me, it just makes me feel so horribly selfish. Like, like all my problems are so stupid and selfish and telling others would only hurt them, and didn’t I want to take everyone else’s burdens away? I’m so stupid. And it just, it hurts.”

Xiao sat there quietly once more, waiting as you cried. At one point you seemed to collapse in on yourself, leaning against his shoulder as if to support yourself. Only then did Xiao allow himself to move. Carding his hands through your hair he said nothing, he merely waited.

“I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. You already have enough burdens, I know. I shouldn’t be complaining to you of all people. I, if you want you can tell me if something is wrong. I mean, you always can, I, just. I don’t know. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“My burdens are my own,” Xiao replied softly, finally letting the emotions swirling through him try to string together as words. “It has nothing to do with you. It never will. You, you should come to me when you feel burdened.”

“But then I’m only passing my problems onto you!”

“I told you, my chains are my own. They are the payment for my contract. They aren’t what you tell me or push on me. If you feel these burdens then give to me. That is my duty.”

“But Xiao, I, I don’t want to. I don’t want to be a problem.”

“How can you say something so stupid,” Xiao scoffed. Bringing his hand to your cheek he sighed softly. “You will never be a problem. You will always be dear to me. Let me help you. You help so many humans. I want to help you.”

“I, I don’t know,” you spoke, voice faltering.

Though Xiao could still feel the tension in the air, could still see the miasma which swirled around you, there was something fragile about it. It was as if Xiao could reach through the tangled threads and pull them away, if only he could find a way to do so. Stroking your cheek softly Xiao pressed his forehead to yours. Closing his eyes he took a deep breath in. After a few moments he heard you do the same.

The rest of the evening Xiao stayed vigilant by your side, listening as you finally let yourself say all the things that had been weighing down upon you. It was painful, listening to you. Xiao constantly had to fight the urge to tell you how wrong you were, how much you mattered and how far he would go to bring you all the happiness he could possible gather in his stained hands. Still he said nothing, for if you had taught him anything it was that simply listening could do infinitely more than promising to fight or trying to shoulder each burden as you lay them out in the daylight.

Eventually you grew exhausted, a combination of the crying and the talking and the reliving. As Xiao listened to your breath even out, softly shifting your head from leaning on his shoulder to resting in his lap, the yaksha thought about all that had happened.

Xiao had assumed that you were somehow above all the humans around you. Purer, gentler, kinder. He hadn’t stopped to think how that might have affected you. Now that he knew that wasn’t true, now that Xiao knew how deeply you felt, how sometimes your mind too chased after darkness or found itself struggling to keep above water, he couldn’t help but feel as if he’d missed something before. Perhaps you shouldered these burdens and perhaps you were just as human as the rest. You were still kind, kind and selfless and utterly beautiful. And Xiao still loved you in a way that continued to burn brightly through his soul.