#and the opinion on who it was before the reveal so divided on if it was billy joel or some random funny guy

[lesbiacnh]

had the weirdest dream that zillow had a comments section for every listing but the comment had to be made by someone who has made an offer on a house in the past two years. and there was a guy who gained a following by commenting “who needs a house out in hackensack” under EVERY house listing in hackensack nd youtubers were making hour long deep dive videos trying to figure out who this guy was. and it ended up being billy joel himself

[tritoch]

i know a lot of people (very understandably) dislike the paladin job quests in ffxiv, particularly HW, but i do think it's fun that, now that the pre-ShB MSQ revamp is complete, paladins now have a very cool and thematic in-game storyline that happens without a word being spoken: the development of passage of arms.

none of the below is directly stated in the script, but imo it's a fairly obvious gloss on what the game presents, if you assume a paladin warrior of light. spoilers for all expansions through the end of 6.X.

in the new version of steps of faith, as vishap breaks through each ward protecting ishgard from attack, lucia mounts a final desperate effort to hold him back, with a very familiar looking animation:

but even lucia can't hold back vishap's flame alone, so the temple knights surge forward to assist her. their efforts make the shield visually more powerful and larger. the temple knights here band together in defense of ishgard, and their knightly resolve to protect their home is the difference between victory and defeat.

lucia and the knights do ultimately succeed in defending the last ward, as you have to defeat vishap before their shield falls or you lose.

later in heavensward, obviously, we will get ffxiv's most famous (failed) attempt at blocking something with a shield.

this moment can be read as fairly impactful on the warrior of light's development; as i've noted elsewhere, after the trauma of watching haurchefant bleed out in their arms at level 57, at level 58 paladins learn to channel their magic into healing (and it's called "clemency," or mercy. mercy for whom? who was guilty?), and as someone pointed out on that post, at level 58 dark knights used to get "sole survivor", letting them heal in response to a marked target's death.

for a time, you literally carry haurchefant's shield with you, and 3.3 very much literalizes in genre fashion the idea that even when you are standing alone, your fallen friends stand with you. you don't need to call any allies to stand at your side and raise their shields with you because they are already there, in spirit.

stormblood marks a pretty important turning point in the warrior of light as a combatant, in my opinion, and the text makes this clear in several ways. first, in pretty much all your jobs, you've now far exceeded your trainers and are pioneering new techniques. this is no less true of paladin, which for 60-70 abandons any trainers at all for you to show off your peerless skills in a tournament.

second, stormblood is straight up a story about you getting stronger. at level 61, zenos kicks your ass. at level 70, you kick his ass. why? because you fought and got stronger and developed incredible new techniques and became a one-man army.

for a lot of classes, this story lines up nicely with the big rotation changes or flashy new finishers on the way from 60 to 70. SMN is now busting out bahamut and casting akh morn; RDM gets verflare and verholy; DRG starts harnessing nidhogg's power directly through dragon sight and nastrond.

the tanks are divided in two: warriors and gunbreakers get huge damaging upgrades at 70 in the form of inner release and continuation, each of which lets them hit the same button many times for lots of damage and satisfying animations. paladin and dark knight get more protective abilities; dark knight gets the blackest night, and there's been plenty said about that already by pretty much everyone.

paladins get passage of arms. instead of a relentless new attack (and you get requiescat at 68, which is a way bigger deal for your dps rotation), your big reveal at 70 for zenos in your fight in ala mhigo is a superior way to protect your party, a shield that lets you stand for your allies so they never have to fall for you again. it's lucia's same shield, except you need no allies' shields to reinforce you, proof of your martial prowess and your ability to transcend limits, and perhaps in truth a reminder that you never really stand alone.

in many respects passage of arms should really feel like a paladin signature move to you now if you are playing it at this point, because you should be popping it in pretty much every fight (you are using your mits, right...?). basically every FFXIV fight has at least one big AOE with downtime that warrants passage of arms usage, usually after the mid-fight add phase with slowly filling bar. since that AOE usually drops during downtime, there's no reason not to pop passage of arms (which otherwise restricts your movement and actions), and even on normal, sometimes every little bit counts on a damage check even if it means dropping DPS (thinking here of harrowing hell P10N on release, which was...less consistent for a lot of roulette parties than you might hope).

so from 70 onward, passage of arms is in a sense a paladin warrior of light's signature move, and certainly the one a player gets to most actually enjoy (since if you're using it, you're by necessity not doing anything besides moving your camera and admiring your sick animation). it doesn't have any competition in terms of spectacle until confiteor, and those you're usually throwing out in the middle of movement.

it's such a signature, in fact, that the only other person shown using your one-person version of passage of arms is your greatest admirer, who studied your legend for over a century.

and it's when he fails (should've popped arm's length, bud) that the warrior of light decides they can't let their friends fall for them, and sends them away with the transporter beacon. this is all wrong: you were meant to die for them, not the other way around. yours is the shield that stands between your allies and defeat. it is you who will win this passage of arms and break your opponents lance. and you do.

and then later, when they need to quickly establish zero's domain as a place of fallen grandeur, the home of someone who once believed in heroes but is now a cool and cynical vampire hunter d, what do they use? a decayed statue of someone in the paladin endwalker gear doing the passage of arms animation, of course.

from a visible instantiation of knighthood as a joint effort to defend what is sacred, to a tribute to the fallen friends whose memories stand by you and animate you, to a symbol of the wol's power as emulated by their allies or darkly mirrored in other shards.

not bad for a mit button you hit once per fight and otherwise never think about!

[arizariia]

Miguel O'Hara As Your Boyfriend Headcanons

This is just the first of my work from TikTok that I'm reposting here. I made a few changes, so it's not exactly the same.

Warnings: None Pairing: F/M Word Count: 691

Prepare to be treated like a princess. He's such a gentleman with you. The type to always show up 10 minutes before a date, hold open the door for you, have a bouquet ready, etc. He is the type of man who insists that you don't have to split the bill. He'll pay for you.

Miguel would prefer to sit down and plan dates with you. He wouldn't feel comfortable with surprise dates until he's known you for some time and is more in tune with your preferences. These planning sessions can result in him stressing out too much about it.

Since there's no way you wouldn't be smaller than him, he gets a kick out of picking you up. He also likes to place things on high shelves, so you'll have to stand on a chair or get him to help. He finds it adorable.

He will always be the big spoon. You'll fall asleep on your side of the bed and wake up in his arms. He's a cuddle monster, even though he doesn't want to admit it.

He wouldn't be against PDA, but the most he'll do is hold your hand and give you quick pecks on the cheek here and there. He's a bit of a prude in public.

If you have any hobbies, Miguel will do his best to get into them. At the very least, understand them better. If it's something nerdy, you'll definitely walk in on him looking at the Wiki page for whatever fandom you're in while wearing reading glasses.

Miguel is a provider, and his love language is gift-giving and acts of service.

His gift-giving can range from buying you that cute dress you said you wanted and tickets for a luxury cruise. He wants to spoil you. This results in him unintentionally becoming your sugar daddy. Since he's usually busy with work, he thinks giving you things can make up for his absence.

If he has the time, he loves to cook for you and prepare your meals. Grocery shopping is also quite enjoyable with him, and he always encourages you to come with him to the store. However, he will side-eye you if you gravitate towards junk food. Cooking is also therapeutic for him. Even if you can cook, you'll usually sit off to the side, watching Miguel work his magic.

When you start living together, he starts doing some of your chores. You'll have to tell him to divide them instead.

At first, Miguel would only call you by your first name when you started dating. It takes a few months for him to address you by a term of endearment. Usually, he would call you by a Spanish endearment, but occasionally, he'll use an English endearment.

Arguments with him aren't frequent. When they do happen, Miguel will shut down. He hates it when these scenarios, especially if he's the cause of the problem. Miguel tends to be the first to apologize in these cases. He will also cut up some fruit for you as a peace offering. However, if you need space, Miguel respects that and waits until you're ready to talk. He isolates himself when that happens.

If you're shy or are the type to withhold your opinions, he's actively encouraging you to express yourself more. He would also make jokes that you're too nice.

If you're not Mexican, he's gonna share his culture with you. If you don't know Spanish, he's gonna teach you. Don't worry. He's surprisingly patient with you. He also wants to learn more about your own culture.

He's a good singer, and he takes full advantage of it. Sometimes, it's to serenade you. Other times (AKA most times), he's just being goofy. He keeps doing it because he knows you like it. Don't mention it around his colleagues. He'll get embarrassed.

Telling you that he's Spider-Man wouldn't be something he'd reveal to you for a long time. When he finally decides to do the reveal, it's more of a spur-of-the-moment decision. But let's be honest, you figured it out months ago. There's only one man in Neuva York who's that double-cheeked up. 

[zeroseuniverse]

User

WC: 1.2 K

Pairing: Kim Seungmin X reader

Warnings: Angst, breakup

It was expected, how could it not be? Dating an Idol would never have been easy, but she at least thought it would be the fans she was battling and not the other members. So when she had heard Changbin explain to Seungmin that all of them thought she was using him, she didn’t exactly know how to approach the situation, she could come out from behind the wall and act like everything is okay, she can walk out of the dorm and away from the boys where she’s not wanted, she can go out and confront the issues head on, or she can excuse herself politely and ask Seungmin to speak to her in private. The latter seemed like the best option for Seeungmin, he preferred when she was upfront about her feelings, but she felt like maybe she could change their minds. So she waited, she didn’t distance herself, it would defeat the whole purpose, but she didn’t go out of her way to make time for them as well. 

The tension lasted months, and it was visibly taking a toll on Seungmin who felt like he had to divide his time between his lover and his group mates. He refused to mention her to his groupmates not willing to start that argument up again, and honestly he would’ve happily kept them physically separated if they didn’t purposefully crash their dates without his permission.

“All I’m saying is, you definitely make more money than her. You’re always paying for the dates. How can you be sure she’s not just using you?” Hyunjin asked, not knowing that the girl in question was just outside the door having come to bring Seungmin his lunch.

“I pay because I want to. And don’t talk as if you know her.” Seungmin frowned, looking down at his phone as he types out a text to his girlfriend asking how far out she was.

“You’re an Idol! She could totally just be using you. She doesn’t belong in this world.” Changbin said, he and Hyunjin seemed the most adverse to Seungmin’s relationship, Felix had tried making her feel welcome but she just gave him a smile and stayed quiet usually, Han naturally didn’t like having her around but it was just because his anxiety spiked everytime the thought of Seungmin getting hurt crossed his mind, Lee Know didn’t care about her, whether she was there or not he just ignored her existence, Chan had nothing against her but avoided her to avoid any issues, Jeongin didn’t hate her per say but he did find her odd, nobody was just naturally that nice in his opinion.

“You don’t know her! You never took the chance to know her so stop making assumptions based on your own fears!” He shouted and would have continued if the door hadn’t opened revealing a teary eyed woman holding a bag of food, she approached her boyfriend without sparing a glance at anyone else. The way she was acting was enough to tell Seungmin exactly how she was going to handle this situation so he quickly gripped her wrist to try and keep her there but she simply pressed a long kiss to his lips before nudging his sad figure away from her.

“Please don’t do this.”

“It’s okay, If it’s meant to be we will be.” was all she said before parting ways and walking past the seven stunned members, all of them confused as to why a gold digger wasn’t trying to force their way into their lives further.

–

She hummed the tune of Case 143 softly as she packed the canned goods into the boxes to be shipped. She was making a lot of progress, especially since her brothers were finding any excuse possible to be near her after the breakup.

The door opening snapped her attention from her work as well as her brothers from the kitchen area, he peered through the window curiously. The entrance of two men made her head tilt in confusion.

“What are you two doing here?”

“The past month Seungmin hasn’t been himself,” Felix murmured, earning a nod from the woman. She knew. Of course she knew she had kept in contact with him and listened to all of his weeping over the situation, “So we did research.” 

“We came across this place and read everything we could about you. Jeongin’s reasoning was he didn’t think anyone could ever be that nice but he was proven wrong, we all were. You were with Seungmin because you truly loved him.” Lee Know sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked around, taking in the different projects in production, so many donation boxes sitting against the wall, clothes, food, blankets so many things scattered about in a mess of organized chaos as the woman worked to make it all ready for shipping.

“Yea well, everyone makes mistakes.” Was all she said, lifting the box and moving around two to make her way towards her other brother who was waiting nearby to carry the next box out to the truck. 

“Is there a way you can forgive us, I really don’t think Seungmin should be punished for our mistakes.” Lee Know tried to reason, earning an eye roll from the family members in the room.

“He’s not being punished.”

“You broke up with him, I’d call that being punished.” Felix commented.

“Yeah well you all tend to make plenty of assumptions, don’t you?”

“This isn’t an assumption, it’s a fact.”

“Is it?” A new voice chirped, making everyone turn to face her oldest brother who had jut entered with Seungmin by his side, the younger boy glaring at his friends who keep butting into his personal life.

“Seungmin?” Felix asked in astonishment, not thinking the two were still in contact, “Look we’re just trying to talk her into talking to you again.”

“She has been talking to me, every night, she calls me every time I have a nightmare, everytime I’m stressed, everytime the tension gets too much and she listens. Despite all the jabs and taunts all of you threw she stayed. We broke up because you guys were too close minded to think anyone could ever love an idol without other intentions. You guys didn’t even give her a chance, well Felix did but everyone else? You guys hated her right off of the back.”

“We were just trying to protect you.” Changbin’s voice spoke up making the woman tense turning to the door to see the other 5 gathered in the door.

“I didn’t need protection, have you seen her? She’s quite literally an angel.”

“We see that now but we were cautious at first, it’s normal.”

“Oh stop trying to rationalize your prejudice, just because she’s not an idol doesn’t mean she’s any less than you. She’s been through more pain than you’ve experienced, that’s why she built this place. To help people who go through what she has gone through. Better yourself. Because that is the only way she’s ever going to get back with Seungmin. She won’t put him in the position where he needs to choose again. So fix it. Because those two were the definition of puppy love and quite frankly I could punch you for taking that away from her.” The eldest brother spoked, patting Seungmin on the back before moving to work with his other brother in the kitchen.

“You guys know where the door is.” She said simply, motioning for the uninvited 7 to leave before turning to her ex with a small smile, “Come on, the puppies are back here.” 

And as the 7 watched the two leave the room, looking lighter as they stood together, their hearts shattered taking in the strain they had placed on their bonds.

[s3raphimssins]

hi hi! :3 idk if you take chuu requests but id really like if you could do like a relationship reveal where the ada find out that reader is dating chuuya?? :3 much love <3

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷summary: they weren't supposed to know! but now that they do how do you make it less awkward.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷pairings: chuuya x fem!ada reader

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷warnings: none!

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷Felix's note: yes! ofcourse! i write about chuu! sorry i took too long! <3 have a great day/night! hope you like it! heart divider by: @cafekitsune <3

the taste of wine lingered on your tongue as the gravity manipulator was holding you on his lap. His tongue roaming your mouth, the kiss never seemed to stop. You were making out since a few minutes and you pulled away to breathe.

"missed ya" he said putting his head on your shoulder.

"I missed you too, but i have to go"

You were in his tinted car in the backseat with him .This wasn't the first time you two met like this. You two had kept this relationship a secret for a while now. You were out to buy some stuff for the agency when chuuyas car stopped by and he pulled you in. Thankfully no one thought you were getting kidnapped this road was always silent, no one really passed here at 8 in the morning.

You two talked for a bit before you opened the car door to leave, when all of a sudden you heard someone whisper. "gotcha"

You yelped in surprise to see your co-worker Dazai standing behind you. "DAZAI?!" you heard chuuya scream as he got out of the car ready to launch at him.

"i see the chuu chuu here has got himself a girl, took you long enough" he smirked.

Chuuya grabbed his collar and asked harshly "you've been stalking us haven't you sly bastard"

You didn't even bother hearing their little bickering because what really took over your thoughts was the sight of the whole agency standing before you disappointed. You suddenly asked "does...everyone know?"

the pair stopped arguing and Dazai said "Ranpo had already figured it out, after i had my suspicions he agreed, i haven't told anybody but ranpo probably has" he said in an oddly cheery tone. Chuuya pushed Dazai away and put his hands on your shoulder "it's-kay doll, don't worry, it'll be okay". You nodded and smiled.

⋇⊶⊰❣⊱⊷⋇

You and Dazai walked back to the agency. You were mostly the one talking asking questions and everything. As you came to the door of the agency you stopped in your tracks when you heard

"THEY'RE GOING TO REGRET THIS" as a fuming Kunnikida rushed out as if to tackle you. "DO YOU REALIZE THE SEVERITY OF YOUR ACTIONS?!" you let out an awkward chuckle and slid past him. Ranpo pointed at you "nothing can hide from the greatest detective!" as he shoved a lollipop in his mouth. You are so screwed. Kunnikida angrily wrote something as Dazai only fueled this anger making his pen snap.

Yosano on the other hand was not fazed. Like seriously at all. She came over to you and started asking questions about your relationship. "If he ever lets his anger get the best of him i wont hesitate to make him my next patient" she cracked her knuckles. "haHA! I can assure you um everything will be fine" you said awkwardly and held her hands down. Naomi and Tanizaki were doing..there own thing. Kenji was actually very happy and said "that mister was very nice! i would like to have lunch with him!" mind you they did. Atsushi on the other hand didn't know how to feel about it. He didn't have an opinion on it but also was a little intimidated by Chuuya, He congratulated you nonetheless.

Everything was going...well? no one really cared except for Kunnikida who keeps scolding you and literally has smoke coming out of his ears.

"i need to meet him" he says angrily.

"woah there old man, relax, slow down" you pat Kunnikidas back as he gently but passive aggressively smacked your hand away.

atleast it went well...you hope the agency does not have secret murder plans against Chuuya; as if they already didn't; but now Dazai seems more set on annoying Chuuya the next time they meet.

[sweet-evie]

Coming Home

Content: Ch #221 SPOILERS, Established Relationship, gojo x afab!oc, gojo x fem!reader, nameless OC, she/her pronouns, lovesick!gojo... Added some extra flare to the unsealing, because Gojo deserves it.

A/N: Actually wrote this back in April 19, 2023… when Ch #221 leaks came out. Posting it now, because I miss him so bad, and was cleaning out my drafts.

✨ masterlist ✨

She’d heard it countless times especially after what happened in Shibuya — Satoru Gojo’s existence was vital in their world. The balance of the jujutsu world shifted upon his birth, and upon his removal, it was plunged into chaos. The fact that his presence alone was a deterrent for powerful curse users that had the intention of harming others testified to how truly influential and powerful he really was.

A walking god among men.

That truth was never more stark until now.

She grew up with him, in a sense — built a life with him for close to a decade and counting, before that ancient sorcerer outwitted them all and took her Love out of the picture. She knew Satoru Gojo as a man. Insanely powerful, yes… Yet he was still just human.

But now… 

Now as the earth finally settled after a long minute of feeling like it was being shaken down to its foundations, she beheld a horizon doused in blue and blinding white, the difference between the Satoru she knew and adored, and the Gojo that the world revered was as clear and divided as night and day.

The heavens roared its greeting as the earth trembled — a minute-long tremor that rocked the ground beneath her feet and caused her to stumble.

Whether they succeeded at opening the back of the Prison Realm or if Satoru himself found a way out, she cared not. It suddenly felt like the world inhaled one deep cleansing breath, releasing it all in a collective sigh of relief that revealed how much their world really needed the one person who stood a chance against the King of Curses and his malevolent reign.

The blinding strobe of light that shot to the sky, past the clouds, slowly faded away.

She had been in the middle of fighting Uro and Ryu when Sukuna cast his threatening presence over the world. That same presence that had Uro cowering and Ryu hesitating. And now… A far greater presence had re-entered the stage.

The elders were so quick to exile him, to strip him of rank and political power. But how foolish were they? Their opinions and their rulings did not matter in the face of Satoru Gojo’s incoming wrath. And what did their destruction and dissolve matter to her when everything she had ever wished for had now come true?

He was back.

Satoru was back… Her partner, her Love, Limitless Power Incarnate, the Honored One in the Heavens and the Earth.

=OoOoO=

What was she supposed to say? Were words even necessary? What was there to say?

She had so many things to say to him and they had so much to do. There were powers to consolidate, forces to account, politics to handle, and a myriad of societal problems to solve. The true work had barely begun. But when they were finally face-to-face, all semblance or thought of everything else except for them disappeared.

To her, there was only Satoru with that same blindfold hanging from his neck, jacket torn but with that same all-black ensemble he wore as a uniform every time he taught at Jujutsu High, staring at her with eyes reminiscent of blue skies dotted with clouds.

He was…weary and noticeably upset, but the relief that completely overcame his expression upon seeing her lightened the heavy emotions that swamped her just before this encounter.

She didn’t hear herself when a sob tore through her throat, and didn’t register the tears that gathered in the corners of her vision as her entire body trembled and she immediately reached for him.

They had a meager audience in the form of Yuji and the others. But did she care?

No…

So when his arms enveloped her and when she could finally feel his heart beating against her own, there was only relief and joy and overwhelming love at their reunion. It felt like coming home.

For the first time in a very long time, she wasn’t alone anymore.

=OoOoO=

There were no words to describe the slough of emotions that bombarded him after making his escape. He almost felt bad after hastily thanking his former students — his adhoc rescuers, Angel with Jacob’s Ladder. But he didn’t really care when all he could think about was her. He needed to know she was safe — that she was all right, that she could still accept him after his failure to uphold his end of the promise. 

He needed to know that she still loved him.

Time passed immeasurably fast — akin to a blink, when he suddenly found himself before her.

He’d been gone for a month, he knew, but it felt like all of these changes had happened in between the snap of measly fingers and eternity. It had been so long and yet it felt too soon.

She stood before him with the most peculiar expression on her pretty face, clad head-to-toe in dark shades of blue and dirty gray, exhausted, trembling, and so emotional. Those gorgeous eyes clouded with unshed tears, unbound hair swaying in the breeze, hands clenched into fists, lips quivering under the weight of suppressed sadness. Her voice as she mewled his name and sobbed, broke his heart.

He always hated seeing her upset — abhorred the thought of her drowning in despair. He never wanted to see her cry.

He wanted her smile, her happiness.

She barrelled straight into him after dismissing her naginata into the ether.

She buried herself in his arms just as he gladly welcomed her in them. Gods, he’d missed her. He refused to count the unnameable hours and minutes he’d spent wishing he could come back to her, return to the home they’d made, and the love they shared between them. She embraced him tightly and he wrapped himself around her, face buried in her hair, inhaling her deeply, treasuring every beat of her beloved heart. She cried in his arms and he couldn’t deny how wet his eyes were too.

Overflowing with relief and happiness, he pulled back just barely to cradle her face in his hands. She leaned into his touch and sighed in relief, with his name on her lips uttered as a reverent prayer. He’d never heard something so sweet and so endearing in his life. One of his thumbs grazed her parted lips — lips that begged to be kissed.

Indulging in his desires and her own, they fell into a sweet, lingering kiss.

Her fingers in his hair, his hands on her, their lips locked desperately to convey the sleepless nights, the loneliness, the despair, the overwhelming need to have the other close. It was completion and happiness and peace all wrapped up in one.

He was hers… And she was his.

They parted but just barely, still sharing breaths, with less than an inch between them.

“I missed you.” She murmured, tracing the curves of his lips with her fingertips.

He wanted to reciprocate with a joke, but really… he couldn’t. It was just… He swallowed thickly as he caught her hand and kissed each fingertip, her knuckles — pressed his lips reverently on the glittering solitaire diamond ring he’d given her for what felt like forever ago. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Satoru.”

“You’re still marrying me, right?”

She laughed, and it was such a heavenly sound to his ears. Her answer was even sweeter in spite of the carnage and desolation around them.

He could ask her a thousand times over, and she was certain her answer to that question was, and always would be, the same in every lifetime, in every situation.

“Yes… Always.”

Riding high from her reassurance, he squeezed her a little tighter, buried his nose into her hair and inhaled the scent of vanilla. He was home — a litany he'd chanted in his head over and over. He had come home; home was her loving arms, her smiles, even her tears. Home was the sound of her voice when she whispered his name.

He saw it in the way her eyes had searched his, tasted it in her lips with each touch, felt it in the way her heart beat against his own.

He was home... Finally home.

==========================================

[Dumped in AO3]

[ryuzakemo128]

Grim Reaper Part Seven

Pairing: Poly 141 x female reader / Female reader/ You x Her mental health x König

Content Warning: Bloodshed, fight between a man and a woman, tech talk, injuries, future implications of murder on the horizon. Use of your nickname for König.

Words: 2628

Masterlist - Prequel - Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Part Six - Part Seven

Supernatural AU - Poem

Credit for Dividers: @cafekitsune + @strangergraphics

Summary: “Who says I was going down to their level? When that level I go to is clearly lower?”

Just because you can, it doesn’t always mean you should.

Sometimes it better to walk away.

Letting things lie.

Leaving them in the shadow of what could have happened if you wanted to act upon your urge to be rid of them.

Your fingers trail along the mask. An incredible gift in your eyes. The sleek material cool beneath your fingers, the curves forming over your face.

As if the material itself bonded together with your face, the digital HUD flickering to life with a gentle hum, casting a soft glow in the otherwise pitch-black room.

Simon took a tentative step towards you. He looked at it, he said, "It's a beauty," he whispered with a hint of envy.

"Lightweight, customisable, and undetectable by most standard security systems, protects my face from dust, debris, and potentially harmful airborne particles." you described part of it.

Other functions of your mask were less visible but equally important. It had a built-in respirator allowed you to breathe without revealing your position through foggy breath in cold environments or leaving a trail in smoke-filled rooms.

The mask's indented 'teeth' served as a silent venting system for the excess heat your body produced during intense combat. It was a marvel of modern warfare technology, and it complemented your lethal skill set like a second skin.

You don’t know when the chatter around started to grate on your ears and eat away at your nerves. Part of you thinks it was because of a certain part of you being denied sustenance. Thrill of a fight itching to be satiated.

Itching. Aching. Burning in the bottom of your stomach like a meal denied.

“We are all doomed. We are not special. None of us are special. We live on a tiny rock floating amongst other tiny space rocks. To imply we are special is to deny the truth. You are not special, just as I am not special.”

You were tired of the excuses. You were tired of them. “You are mediocre at best and tolerable at worst. I don’t care about you or anyone else here. Your existence is finite.”

“You are mediocre at everything I have seen you do.” You repeated with a narrowed glare. “Everything you are. It could and would be forgotten as long as your superiors benefit from it.”

“You don’t get to keep something someone else owns. Not ever. I don’t need a ‘saviour’ stop implying that I need one.” You murmured, your voice as fierce as a cat's growl. Your hold on his throat base stayed firm, as relentless as desert sands.

Despite your injury, you retaliated fiercely when threatened sufficiently. The cut deep enough to insert at least three fingers. You were always considered difficult to your peers. You didn't care about their opinion as much as they believed.

Imagine talking about someone’s trauma and labelling them as the ‘difficult one’ pathetic morons can’t consider the fact trauma changes people.

If they knew how trauma worked, they wouldn’t be flapping their pathetic mouths so much.

They need to learn to shut the fuck up.

Projecting their morals onto others like they’re the only people in the world.

Shut the fuck up. Most of you are more likely to have the privilege to never go through it.

Stupid pathetic moronic children who can only think of themselves first.

I see Simon receive the same treatment by women who label him the ‘difficult one’. It makes me want to smack the shit out of all of them.

Assault of any kind should not be tolerated. They need to shut the fuck up before I make them shut up.

I am tired of them. I am sick of their justifications of labels on people.

Shut the fuck up, I hate you all.

Trauma isn’t something you belittle. Yet you seem to have fun in doing just that. I hope you die and reach a depth of hell most won’t be able to reach.

It is what you deserve. It is what I want you to have. Now more than ever.

You think you snapped when it happened. Not that you aimed for a psychological snap any time, sooner or later. Yet the whispers and murmurs grated on your nerved like nails on a chalkboard. Call me pathetic and I will give you death.

I will give you a death even your so called god will not look away.

Your enemies cannot reach you. Sleep well, the clock ticks on.

The stars do not know you, prepare, they’ll whisper you your fate.

They look at you and wonder how you are even alive. Fear mixed with disgust. You feel it. You see it. They keep you because otherwise you would have been a darker shell of yourself.

He pushed you far enough to get here. Yet it caused you to laugh. To giggle. The blood gushing from your nose, a bit from your mouth, you laugh. You laugh because you know it’s all a game to them. A game of fear and power. And in that moment, you had all the power. You knew because the stars had already whispered to you, and they had never lied.

"An itty bitty knife? Are you fucking serious?" you taunted him.

The man snarled back a response, "This isn't a game, bitch," as he raised the knife, ready to strike fear into your heart.

“Are you scared? Are you going to run crying to your superiors, little bitch?” you taunted relentlessly. “Gonna cry now?”

A beast circling its wounded prey, every nip, every bite and every taunt. You became more beast than human when your anger wound-up tighter than a coiled snake. Posed and poised to strike. His eyes widened with fear, his breaths shallow, and his smugness replaced with a desperate plea for mercy.

Simon intervened, trapping you inside a headlock, the guy silently murmured and thanked for his timely intervention. He got off lightly in your opinion. Though getting stabbed by a butterfly knife put a damper on things.

"You're the one who should be scared." Simon's voice was cold and firm as he held you back, his grip tight but not painful. "You're better than this. Don't let them bring you down to their level."

“Who says I was going down to their level? When that level I go to is clearly lower?” you growled like a feral creature, clawing at Simon’s arms as he held you firmly in his grasp. His eyes, a mix of concern and irritation, searched yours for any hint of sanity left in the rage-filled maelstrom.

“We need him alive for intel," Simon reminded you, his tone still unyielding. You knew he was right, but the desire to rip the man’s throat out was a hunger that demanded satiation.

“Tell him that. The fucker stabbed me not you.” You jerked your chin towards the man cowering on the floor, trying to push Simon away, but his grip was like steel bars.

You knew he was right, but the adrenaline and anger pumping through your veins made it hard to think rationally.

You felt the warmth of the blood trickling down from your nose, mixing with the saliva on your teeth. It tasted metallic, a flavor you had become unfortunately accustomed to.

“Calm down,” Simon whispered in your ear, his grip on your arms tightening. “Remember who you are. Remember why we're here. And we'll get the stab wound looked at, I promise.”

“I'm not calming down for his sake.” You reminded him.

“No,” Simon's voice was low and controlled, “You're calming down for ours. We need you focused.”

You let out a breath, trying to regulate your breathing, which Simon knew was a sign that you were listening to him. You nodded slightly, allowing him to loosen his grip.

The room fell silent, except for the distant sound of gunfire outside the abandoned warehouse. The man on the floor was trembling, his eyes darting between you and the knife clutched in his hand.

Soap walked in moments after the whole debacle, his eyes scanning the scene before his gaze settled on the trembling man. “Well, well, look what we have here. A little stabbing party and I missed the invite,” he quipped, a smirk playing on his lips. He knelt down, pulling the knife from the man’s shaking hand with ease. “Looks like you’ve had enough fun for one night.”

You were about to leave the rest to Simon and Soap when Soap dragged you out instead, muttering things about not letting the bloodlust get to you. “I could have walked outside you know?” you muttered to him.

“You're a liability like this,” he shot back.

“Like what? Stabbed?” you countered.

Soap's smirk grew wider, “Exactly. Now, let’s get that wound patched up before you go full on Wolverine on us.”

“The animal or the mutant?” you snorted. “My life would be easier if it was the mutant. He heals instantly. Don't roll your eyes at me. I read so many X-Men comics growing up.”

Soap chuckled despite the gravity of the situation, his Scottish accent thick with sarcasm. “Ah, so you’re telling me you wish for the gift of healing rather than the rage of the beast?” He led you to a makeshift medical station set up in the corner of the warehouse, the harsh lighting revealing the stark contrast of the crimson blood against your pale skin.

“I mean that would just come with the healing right? With how Wolverine is, I wouldn’t mind the rage as much. The claws would be a bonus.” you quipped.

Soap shook his head, his amusement clear despite the seriousness of the situation. He took a deep breath, his eyes focused on the wound, “Well, we’ve got bandages, not adamantium, but it’ll have to do for now.”

Simon glared at the comment made from a bystander calling you cute when you are clearly not. You had wanted to be called it when you weren’t bloodied with another person’s blood on your uniform and your knuckles.

Once you were isolated, Price looked at you from the sidelines, his expression unreadable. As you let your aggression out on a punching bag. The smacking of gloves against leather in the background as they continued to speak about the fight between you and a guy who happened to be taunting Simon.

It grated on you enough to lash out. Ending in bloodshed. Despite these fights being rare, they are bloody enough for people to remember them. You felt the weight of Price’s gaze, his silent disapproval heavy in the air. He couldn't be upset with you entirely as you don't escalate them as much as people would love to believe.

“You okay?” he finally spoke, his tone flat.

“If you're angry with me just say so.” you told Price.

Price took a drag of his cigar, his eyes never leaving yours, “I'm not angry with you.” He said, “I'm just concerned. This isn't the first time you've lost it like that.”

“And it's not the first time they escalated it either. But you don't see that part because by the time you're here. They're on the ground and I'm already stabbed.” you reminded him. “Lecture them before you lecture me.”

Price's eyes narrowed slightly, but he didn’t argue. Instead, he took a step closer, his voice dropping to a serious whisper, “Look, I know you've been through a lot, but we need you sharp. We can't afford any more… incidents like this. Do you understand?”

“How about you tell them to keep their hands to themself?” you countered.

Price sighed, his gaze flickering to the side, “It’s not that simple.”

“Yes it is. Its called keep your hands to yourself. Don't touch someone without their consent.” you reminded him.

Price knew you had a point, but the situation was more complicated than that. He stepped closer, his hand reaching out to gently touch your shoulder. “I’ll handle it. But you need to control your temper. We're in a war zone, not a playground. If we don’t keep our heads on straight, we're all going to end up dead. Or worse, captured.”

Like the god Hades, you will never been seen as anything other than a monster of your own creation. Maintaining a balance most will never see. Passive. Altruistic. A creature made by whims and wants of others. A creature made and remade repeatedly.

A story retold to fit the whims and wants of those they want to appeal to. Hades went from passive to a main villain because of the lack of media literacy to think clearly. Whittling down his wife to a lost lamb in distress. When she is in fact his queen with strengths of her own.

A falsehood created by those who would rather see their version of a tale prevail than to see a man be gentle with his wife. Better to dehumanise the king of the underworld than to think otherwise.

They don’t seem to understand. Evil has no shading. Darkness does not equate to evil, and living in the shade of blissful ignorance will not save you.

Just as fire causes destruction. It also has a hand in creating life.

Neither side is good. Neither is side is bad. Both sides would have been considered good and great given the angle someone would take. Both sides can be considered a great evil. No matter what happens from this point forward. You will always be referred to as the name you are given. No matter how tainted you feel about yourself.

They will still refer to you by this name. Now, today and tomorrow.

As Elysium and Tartarus are both heaven and hell. It is both. It will always be both.

Choosing to believe one version of a tale over the other reeks of bias.

Much like Hades. You don’t have to go to them. People will come to their own end when they come to you. A fruitless endeavour to ever hope they could live to see tomorrow if they were your target. They are good as dead.

You are the least evil amongst them. It also didn’t mean you are harmless like a pup as much some might think.

“They will all come to me eventually. Regardless of how they feel on the matter.” You muttered. Mostly to yourself than to Simon.

Simon decided to interject, his deep British accent breaking through your deep meditated rhythm. The punches against the bag hard enough to shake through a concrete wall. Strong enough to go through a wall made of wood. You wore specialised earphones to block out background noise.

Now all there is left of you there are memories. It’s been a month since your kidnapping, entering into a second month now. They turned to your private thoughts of your journal in the hope they would find you sometime soon. Hoping König would not kill you out of boredom of you.

People fear death and fawn over theatrics.

People hate you because you represent the end of life.

Death. Grim Reaper.

Retellings will tell them you took them. Kidnapped them.

Even though your intentions were revealed to them and them alone.

Behind closed doors.

Twisting your words against your memory.

Even when your intentions were not what they will assume.

They mix up benevolent with kindness. You will show them, won’t you Mäuschen?

You will show them what it means to evoke the name of death upon their lips, right Maus?

The walls of your old bedroom, no longer the same as they once were. Not like you cared now. It was a moment of another time. Inside a lifetime, you thought you had all to yourself. Fleeting, as they were, finite. You were glad they were gone. As you were about to something so heinous. Even your mother would have disowned you.

No. She isn’t here anymore. She can not save you. No one outside this room can save you apart from yourself.

Rely on your instincts.

“What’s the matter, lamb? Are you scared?” You cooed into his ear. A plan forming in the back of your mind. If this was the game, he set up. He should be prepared for you to win it.

Fair is fair after all.

What is his will become yours.

What is yours will never be his again.

[cherienymphe]

The Less I Know The Better V (JJ Maybank x Reader x Rafe Cameron)

Warnings: loss of virginity, eventual NON-CON, eventual DUB-CON, violence, public sex, jealousy, underage drinking, drug use, manipulation, mild unhealthy relationship, one sided kiara x jj, non canon ages, pogue!reader

➥ banner by @vase-of-lilies​ | divider by @firefly-graphics​

➥ series masterlist

summary:  When you start dating Rafe Cameron, no one is more surprised than you when your best friend JJ takes it really well. However, no one is more surprised than JJ when he’s forced to see his once frumpy BFF in an entirely new light, suddenly terrified of losing what he never knew he had to the person he hates most.

~

You didn’t like Ward Cameron.

Everyone knew who Ward was. Long before Sarah and John B. had started dating, long before she started making herself comfortable on your side of the island, and long before you dated Rafe. You knew who Ward was, and your opinion of him then was like your opinion of just about every Kook. Privileged, sheltered, and maybe even prejudiced.

However, becoming friends with Sarah revealed another side to the man you didn’t know.

“He’s from The Cut, you know,” she’d said one day. “…and it’s why he can be such a hard ass sometimes. He’s worked so hard to get where he is now and to give us the life he didn’t have.”

It had been easy to see that Sarah admired him, and as much as you hadn’t wanted to admit it, you’d developed some grudging admiration for the man too. It had shocked you, and it had even made you second guess just about every Kook on the island for a moment. Then you’d started dating Rafe, and you saw yet another side to Ward.

…and you didn’t like it.

“So, when I ask you to clean the gutters, I get all kinds of excuses. I ask you to help Rose in the yard, and that’s too much for you. I can’t even hand you money to help out with things around the house…but you have money to blow when it comes to some silly girl from The Cut?”

Ward’s booming voice carried, and you were sure he knew it.

You sat on Rafe’s bed, listening to Ward tearing into him from down the hall. Since you’d started dating Rafe and spending more time in the Cameron household, you realized that this wasn’t a rare occurrence. You knew better than anyone how Rafe could be, and maybe you were just biased, but at times you felt like Ward was too hard on him.

Anyone could see how much Rafe wanted his dad’s approval. Anyone could see the desperation in his eyes for it, and while Rafe could definitely be better, anyone could also see that he probably never stood a chance. You loved Sarah to death, but Ward had a favorite, and he’d never bothered to be discreet about it. You imagined that Rafe probably saw no point in fighting a battle he’d already lost from the moment Sarah was born.

You looked down, playing with your fingers and thinking to yourself that it was safe to say that Ward wasn’t happy about your little trip. You’d already assumed that Rafe had mentioned it to him until you heard him tell Ward he was going to be borrowing the boat. He’d done so in passing, and by the look on Ward’s face, it had been obvious to you that this was the first mention of it.

When Rafe stormed into his room, you didn’t say anything, swallowing. The tautness in his face was familiar, and you worriedly eyed him, watching the way his chest heaved. He rubbed his hands down his face, and the look in his eyes reminded you of nights where you’d see him at some party, pupils blown and words slurring as he looked for any reason to start a fight.

“Rafe…”

“If I do something right…it doesn’t even get noticed,” he bit out. “…but if I do something wrong…?”

His voice was low, and hesitantly, you slid off his bed and moved towards him. Rafe let you take his hand, using your other to reach for his face.

“I’m sorry,” you didn’t know what else to say.

Whenever JJ would come to your door, bruised and bloody, you’d give your same speech that you always did. How much you hated the man, begging JJ to leave home, never surprised when he refused. You’d make snacks and put on something sill to watch or just talk, really anything to take his mind off of it and forget. JJ was at a place where he just seemed to accept his dad for who he was, no matter how horrible. Rafe, on the other hand… Rafe’s desperation for his dad’s love and acceptance was as obvious as the day was long, and you knew that telling him to forget about Ward wasn’t going to have the desired effect.

“I don’t know why I even bother to try, you know…

Sarah had always talked about the tension between Rafe and their father, and you didn’t know if it was intentional or not, but she downplayed just how deeply it ran. It wasn’t some superficial run of the mill back and forth between a parent and their child, and you pulled Rafe into a hug. He didn’t hug you back, but you didn’t care, just wanting him to know that you were here for him even if his dad wasn’t.

“You’re the only one who’s on my side…you know that?” you heard him murmur.

“I know,” you whispered with a nod.

Instead of hugging you back, Rafe took your face in his hands and forced your head back. His eyes were tearful but not in a way that reflected sadness. He looked angry, his blue eyes cold and jaw tight.

“Sometimes I feel like you’re the only one I can count on.”

The amount of pressure you felt at that sentence was at war with the amount of pride you felt. It didn’t seem the healthiest that Rafe felt like you were his only option to turn to, but you couldn’t lie to yourself and say it didn’t feel…nice. He briefly pecked you on the lips, the action seeming to calm him down as he ran his hands down your arms.

“He’s an asshole, anyway,” he breathed, a switch going off in him as he forced it to the back of his mind. “Kelce is having some people over, tonight.”

He moved by you, searching his room for a different shirt to put on. It amazed you how Rafe could seamlessly switch like that, so angry and hurting one minute and then the next it was like nothing ever happened. You continued to watch him in concern, forcing yourself to let it go for now when he asked you about coming with.

“Is that okay…?”

He knew what you were really asking, and Rafe rolled his eyes, a small smile on his lips.

“You’re with me now,” he slowly reminded you, pulling you against him. “…and no one’s going to treat you like anything less.”

You allowed Rafe’s words to reassure you, helping him pick out a shirt. Ward was holed up in his office when you left, Rafe’s hand clasped with yours. You didn’t feel like you were dressed enough for some party, but the way Rafe pressed kisses along your face made you think that maybe you looked more than fine.

You were happy that Rafe didn't downplay it, relieved that only a handful of cars were in the yard when you arrived. You and Rafe had been together for some time now, so you weren’t given as many second glances as you had grown used to getting. You had watched JJ and the rest of your friends smoke weed for years, but watching Rafe’s friend snort coke like it was sugar was entirely different.

While being offered some made you feel included, that didn’t lessen your shock.

“She’s good,” Rafe answered for you.

Your eyed briefly met his, a slight frown on your face. Sure, you had no intention of snorting anything anytime soon, but the quickness in which Rafe answered gave you pause. Not to mention that he was even answering for you in the first place. Kelce chuckled, but Rafe didn’t laugh back, staring at his friend with an even expression.

“Let the lady decide for herself-.”

“I said,” Rafe interrupted, tone just as even as his expression. “…she’s good.”

You were sitting beside your boyfriend on the couch, and the slight twitch in his face told you that he was looking for a reason. You suspected that his argument with Ward was still eating at him, and you took his hand, not wanting the night to be ruined.

“I’m fine, Kelce, really.”

The guy in question raised his hands with a shrug, offering what might’ve been your line to someone else. Rafe was uncharacteristically quiet throughout most of the night as the small get together grew into what could be categorized as a full-blown party. He rarely left your side, and you had a feeling that was more so for his sake than yours.

It was later in the night when you and Rafe found yourselves on the back steps. You were resting between his legs, sat on a lower step with your arms and chin resting on his thigh. One of his hands rested on your head, moving around and massaging your scalp.

“You know you’re not the boss of me, right?” you finally said.

You heard Rafe sigh, a light chuckle escaping him.

“I knew you were going to say something.”

You sat up, looking up at him with a slight frown.

“Of course, I was,” you scoffed. “No, I’ve never been interested in coke, and I’m not going to start now, but you could’ve let me think about it, at least.”

“What’s there to think about?” he wondered with a shrug.

The muffled sound of music reached your ears as you two stared each other down.

“What if I wanted to say yes?”

“Absolutely not,” he drawled, and your frown deepened.

“So, what? You can snort so much until another hole is burned in your nose, but I can’t?”

“No, actually,” he snapped, voice a little louder now. “You can’t.”

The bass in his voice gave you pause, and you blinked as he gazed at you from beneath his lashes. Rafe suddenly exhaled, heavily, and your face fell.

“You think I want you losing your mind when you’re upset or…a little down because the only effective way you’ve learned to cope with it is by snorting whatever up your nose?”

Your gaze found the wood of the porch.

“You think I want to see you only able to actually function when you’re high on something? Hmm?”

He continued when you didn’t respond.

“…or what about when you’re so used to it that you don’t even think twice about driving anywhere after you’ve snorted a line? Or when you go to a party, and you feel like you can’t even enjoy yourself if you aren’t high?”

Your eyes met his again, and you swallowed, taken aback. You had thought that Rafe was just being his normal asshole self, but now you were the one left feeling bad. He swiped his tongue between his lips, glancing away, head lowering and dirty blond strands hanging into his face.

“You’re supposed to be better than me,” he murmured. “I like that you’re better than me.”

Your chest clenched for reasons you couldn’t name, and you took his hand.

“You think I want you to be like me?”

He was looking at you again, and you shook your head even though the question was rhetorical.

“I’m sorry,” you quietly told him. “I just thought you were being…”

You trailed off, standing and moving to sit on the step directly below him. Rafe took you in his arms, your back pressed to his chest, and you closed your eyes when buried his face into the crook of your neck. You rested your hands on his arms, thinking to yourself that when you first started dating Rafe, you didn’t expect that to include hiding out at some party, having a heart to heart because Rafe never wanted you to be like him.

Taking the Cameron’s boat from OBX to the mainland was something you’d been prepared for, but you hadn’t prepared yourself for how much you’d enjoy it. You’d been scared at first, unsure of how great Rafe was at handling a boat, but he’d happily proven you wrong.

The first day in Charlotte was mostly spent relaxing. Rafe, the spoiled brat that he was, was too busy making sure everything in the room was up to par while you jumped on the bed. You had to talk him out of going downstairs and complaining about a whole bunch of nothing you were sure he just made up.

“We’re here with just us,” you told him. “No Ward, no Rose, and none of my friends breathing down your neck.”

The blond had taken a deep breath, and you leaned into him, sliding off of the bed and into his arms.

“When we look back, I don’t want to think about everything that went wrong and beefing with the hotel staff. I want to think about how much fun we had…or could’ve.”

It hadn’t taken him long to relent, and before you knew it, you’d both taken showers and were making your way down to the pool room. You spent hours swimming and floating around each other, talking about things you never had before and everything you already had. It wasn’t lost on you that you were far away from home and in a hotel with your boyfriend for days.

It definitely crossed your mind, that one or both of you would try and take advantage of this opportunity. Unsurprisingly though, after spending some time in the jacuzzi, Rafe led you upstairs without even a hint of wanting to sleep with you. He’d already made his feelings on that clear, and that first night, after he’d fallen asleep before you, you rested your head on his chest and wondered if you wanted this trip to be memorable for a whole other reason.

The second day, you’d both woken up early, Rafe surprising you with breakfast in bed courtesy of room service.

“What if we brought something back for Ward?”

Rafe had given you a look over his glass of orange juice.

“Maybe he won’t be as mad about the trip and the boat,” you suggested with a shrug. “Kind of like a little thank you.”

“It’s cute that you think that’ll do the trick,” he grumbled.

“It can’t hurt to try…”

He hadn’t responded to that, but you had noticed him eyeing some golf clubs when you went shopping. That was how most of the second day was spent, going from store to store and mostly browsing until Rafe talked you into actually letting him buy you anything you wanted.

“Let me see,” you heard him call, and you grimaced.

The dress was pretty enough, unsurprised that Rafe had picked it up when he saw you eyeing it for more than twenty seconds. The only problem was that it was too fancy, you had absolutely nowhere to wear it, and that was what you told Rafe.

“Nowhere?” he hummed, hands gentle on your waist as he forced you to turn in a circle. “I wouldn’t say that…”

You curiously eyed him, and the corner of Rafe’s lips curved upwards into a smirk.

“My girl has to be the prettiest one at Midsummers.”

You paused, having forgotten about that entirely. You softly chuckled to yourself, a little in disbelief even though you shouldn’t have been. Growing up on The Cut, you had never desired to be anything like a Kook. Not really, anyway, but Pope’s dad would cater the event sometimes and Kie wasn’t a stranger to it even if she always refused to go. There’d always been a small part of you that you never wanted to accept that was envious of the pretty gowns the girls would show up in and the extravagant flare of it all.

You knew JJ would tease you if you ever admitted that, so you kept it to yourself.

“Oh,” you breathed. “I forgot.”

Rafe frowned a bit, suddenly looking unsure.

“You do want to go with me, right?”

“Of course, I do! It just wasn’t something I thought about…until now.”

You couldn’t stop your smile, running your hands down the dress.

“It’s perfect,” you told him, leaning in to kiss him before returning to the fitting room.

It was still so odd for you to date someone with the kind of wealth you could never even fathom. If Rafe wasn’t so casual and incessant about it, you might be concerned that you were taking advantage of him. In the past two days, Kie and Sarah had texted you here and there to see how things were going. You weren’t surprised that John B. and Pope texted you too, someone else telling them about the trip, no doubt. However, as you stood in the fitting room, you realized that you still hadn’t heard anything from JJ.

You told yourself that maybe he just didn’t want to bother you, but it just didn’t seem like him.

By the time you got back to the hotel, you were dead on your feet. You didn’t hesitate to run a bath, a ridiculous amount of bubbles covering you as Rafe at on the edge of the tub. Again, you thought about that thing you had been trying not to think about, noting how naked you were and how close he was. You weren’t surprised at how much you just wanted to stand up and let him see you in all your glory.

However, you reminded yourself that you always imagined your first time being some well thought out romantic affair. You wanted to work up to it, prepare yourself and maybe even ingest half a bottle of alcohol to calm your nerves. Kie agreed the next day as you facetimed her in some dressing room. Rafe had given you the card, the blond half asleep as he kissed you goodbye and told you to buy something nice.

If only he knew…

“Okay,” Kie finally said after several moments of silence, blinking. “That’s…wow, okay.”

You stood in some fancy lingerie store, wearing something that you never thought you’d be caught dead in in your life.

“Do you think it’s too much? Should I tone it down or…wear less?”

“Truthfully I think Rafe would screw you in a plastic bag, so I don’t think it matters much as long as you like it,” she answered, eyeing the material. “It’s very cute, very you, and still…you know.”

You sighed, sitting down on the seat.

“I just keep thinking that this is the perfect time. I don’t want it to be in his bedroom with Wheezie down the hall, and I don’t want it to be at my house where my parents or, God forbid, JJ could show up at any moment.”

Kie nodded in understanding at that.

“This trip has been really nice so far, and…” you chuckled. “I kind of feel like a princess.”

Kie softly smiled at that.

“He makes you really happy. I can tell.”

“He does,” you confirmed.

“I was really skeptical, at first. I’m sure you knew, but I was fully prepared to ruin his stupid truck when I thought he’d inevitably mess this up,” she told you. “…but he’s really different around you, and…if you trust him, that’s what matters.”

You took a deep breath, voice shaky, and Kie noticed.

“What if I don’t like it? Oh God, what if I’m bad?”

“Look at me,” she told you, and you did. “You’re going to love it. I know you will because Rafe is going to make sure you do.”

You relaxed some.

“His ego is too big,” she said, making you laugh. “…and…bad? Really? Guys jerk off into socks. There’s no such thing as bad in bed.”

Kie’s words did reassure you, and by the time you got back to the hotel, your heart wasn’t beating so fast out of fear and nerves…but excitement.

“I thought that maybe you’d drowned in there,” Rafe said when you finally left the bathroom.

The fluffy white robe was pulled tight around you, and you happily took the drink he poured you. He’d only raised an eyebrow at you at your request for something to drink. You tried to drink it slow, sip on it and savor the flavor, but you ended up inhaling the whole thing.

“You know you’re a lightweight,” Rafe half teased, taking the glass from you.

“I know,” you replied. “…but I need to be just a little bit drunk for this.”

Before Rafe could answer, you were pushing him towards the bed. He raised both his brows at you, allowing you to do so, teeth winking at you when you climbed onto his lap.

“Are you trying to seduce me?”

“Is it working…?”

He didn’t say anything, merely tilting his head at you. It wasn’t long before you felt him beneath you, hard and intimidating, and you let out a soft ‘oh’. Rafe played with your sleeve, licking his lips.

“I didn’t bring you here for this. I don’t want you to think-.”

“I know,” you shushed him. “…but I couldn’t think of a better time.”

Rafe’s expression was serious, blue gaze searching yours.

“I was going to ask if you’re sure, but you look very determined to get in my pants,” he teased.

“I am,” you confirmed, kissing him.

The champagne on your tongue made the kiss sweeter, your hand on Rafe’s neck as he moved his lips against yours. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears, and your fingers trembled, but it was all in anticipation. Not so much anticipation for sex in general, but for Rafe. To see all of him, to experience all of him, to feel his skin against yours.

When Rafe pulled at the hotel robe, you shivered, the cool air hitting your skin. His other hand pulled at the belt, and it completely fell open. Rafe kissed down your throat, and you tilted your head back, fingers threading through his hair. You felt him pull back…and pause.

You leaned back a bit when his hand grazed the material, swallowing. His eyes weren’t on you but instead your entire frame, gaze roaming over your body and the lace that covered it. Rafe blinked, lips parting before his tongue darted out to touch his bottom one.

“You told me to buy something nice.”

He merely hummed, pressing his hand against your stomach. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but by the feel of him between your legs, you could only assume that it was good.

“I really need to know what you’re thinking,” you lightly said.

Rafe exhaled, pulling at the bow.

“I’m thinking…that I want to see you in this again,” he sighed. “So I unfortunately can’t just…rip it off.”

Rafe’s words made your heart jump, and you watched the way his jaw clenched as he carefully untied it, seemingly annoyed that he couldn’t do just that. He scooted back, taking you with him before rolling over so you were under him, now. He kept his eyes on your body as he reached under you to pull down the zipper. The sound was so loud in the otherwise quiet room, and his other hand pulled down the straps. He moved down the bed as he slid it down your legs, and you were only in the underwear as you watched him stand.

You watched Rafe undress, never taking your eyes off of him.

You reached for him when he climbed back onto the bed, but he stopped at your feet, reaching out to hook his fingers into the sides of the flimsy panties. Your eyes found the ceiling as he pulled them down, and your breath hitched as he kissed your ankle before separating them. You could feel his breath on you and being no stranger to the feel of his tongue on you, you still gasped when he tasted you.

On instinct, your hands found his hair, and Rafe moaned when you pulled on it. The feel went straight through your body, and you gasped again. He flickered his tongue against you before tasting you with his entire mouth, tongue pushing into you and swiping against your walls. You sighed his name, head lolling as he ate you out.

Your toes curled when he slipped a finger into you, hips lifting a bit. He slowly pulled and pushed it in and out of you, curling into you and massaging your core. When he added a second one, he did it slow, and at this, you twisted your hands into the sheets.

“Deep breaths,” you heard him whisper, and you heeded his suggestion.

You could both feel and hear yourself getting wetter, unsure if you should be embarrassed or proud at how turned on you were. Rafe remained like that for a while, just sliding his fingers into you and kissing and licking your skin. When you felt a third finger press to your opening, Rafe shifted, moving to his knees and looming over you.

His free hand pressed against your stomach to hold you still while he added a third finger. You clenched at the discomfort, and Rafe shushed you when he heard you whine.

“Open up for me, baby,” he quietly told you. “Relax and open up for me.”

He leaned down, lips brushing over yours and chest grazing yours, his fingers still moving within you and stretching you out. You clung to him, hands pressing into his back and arm, lashes fluttering when his lips trailed to your throat. You could feel that familiar heat building in the pit of your stomach, heart racing. Before it could build anymore, Rafe pulled his fingers out of you and brought them up to his lips. He pulled you against him, humming at the taste of you before kissing you again.

“You’re mine, right?” he breathed into the kiss, and you nodded. “All mine?”

“Uh huh,” you told him.

He made himself comfortable between your legs, and you lifted your hips, gasping as the tip of him poked against you. Rafe kissed you again, harder…hungrier, and you stopped breathing when he started to push his way into you.

“You promise?”

“I promise,” you gasped as he bottomed out.

His cock was nothing at all like his fingers, fitting in you so snugly and so thickly that you actually pressed your nails into his skin. Rafe hissed at the feel, and try as you might, you couldn’t let him go. You squeezed your eyes shut, acknowledging that it wasn’t as painful as you expected, just uncomfortable, and Rafe pressed his lips to your cheek.

“Breathe, baby,” he encouraged, kissing along your face and throat. “Just breathe.”

You wrapped your arms around him, sliding them along his frame and holding him close. You could feel him twitching inside of you, could feel his heart racing in time with yours, and even though Rafe had worlds of experience over you, you got the feeling, or at least hoped, that this meant as much to him as it did to you.

When he started to move, when you gave him the okay, he did so slowly. Rafe moved like you were made of glass or the finest of China, worried to hurt you in any way. It was strange for you. You’d witnessed Rafe break countless noses with no remorse. You’d seen him smash a beer bottle against JJ’s back once. You could remember the strain in his face and muscles while he exerted his power over someone to do them harm.

Now, you could see that same strain for an entirely opposite reason.

Rafe curved his hips into yours with a pace that made you croon. He loomed over you like a protective entity, pushing his cock into you and pinning you down with every thrust. The only light was from that of the city outside, glinting off of his eyes and hair. You touched his face, your breaths mingling together.

The more he thrust into you, the more comfortable you felt. The easier it was, and you ran your foot up his leg. It stopped feeling odd and started feeling more like it had before, a fire being stroked within you but stronger…hotter. It still took some getting used to, but the pleasure outweighed all of that.

The sound of Rafe’s moans turned you on, clenching around him and desperately wanting to hear more. You closed your eyes when he buried his face against your neck, twisting your fingers into his hair. You arched against him, your body taking on a life of it’s own as you met him thrust for thrust.

“Do you know how good you feel?” he breathed against your skin.

As if to emphasize that, his next thrust rocked the bed, and you threw your head back. You felt overstimulated. Rafe’s groans were all you could hear, the smell of him filled your nose, and all you could feel was his cock plunging into you and his dewy skin sliding against yours. You wanted to taste him, and listening to your impulses, you did.

You pushed his head back some, Rafe so caught up in the feel of you that he let you. You craned your head, teeth darting out to nip at his skin and laving your tongue against his neck. Rafe shuddered at the action, hands digging into your hips. You felt possessed, clawing at him and wanting him closer, tasting his skin like you couldn’t get enough.

You didn’t keep track of how long you were beneath Rafe, clinging to him and kissing him. You let him do whatever he wanted to you. Pressing bruises into your thigh, biting at your neck, wrapping his lips around your breasts. At some point, Rafe had your entire back lifted off the bed, head brushing the sheets as he gently bit the soft tissue.

When you finally came around him, you saw stars, both the room and Rafe disappearing as you clenched down on his cock. You could feel yourself dragging your nails down his skin, but only faintly, feeling like your mind was a thousand miles away. When you felt like you’d finally come back down to earth, Rafe was still pumping into you, kissing you and telling you how good you were.

“Good girl,” he whispered. “You’re doing so good.”

You dazedly wrapped your arms around his neck, sighing when he sat back, pulling you against him. When Rafe asked if you had another one in you, you nodded, smiling at the grin on his own face.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you breathed.

He pressed open mouth kisses along your throat, and you didn’t even care about how sore you’d be in the morning.

[queervocasongtourn]

WELCOME TO THE VOCALOID QUEER SONG TOURNAMENT!

This tournament is meant not only to discern what's the most beloved queer vocaloid song, but also to share queer music to new people so we can all enjoy it to the fullest!

THE RULES

Do listen to all songs before voting! Unbiased opinions are fine, biased opinions are fine, but at least give all songs a chance!

Remember that once you vote, you can't un-vote! So choose wisely!

And nothing more, have fun!

THE BRACKETS

Yes, you read that correctly! Since there are a grand total of 152+ songs in this tournament among over 360 submissions (that's a lot!), the bracket has been divided into FIVE SUB-BRACKETS of 32 songs each. They will be revealed one by one, after the first round of each is done, and the resulting five songs will face off to see who the winner is!

The very first bracket (Side A) is the following:

The second bracket (Side B) is the following:

[Small mistake on my part! Zero Talking is not supposed to be here, instead it's supposed to be Reunion!]

Third bracket, side C, is as follows:

(Do forgive the atrocious brackets... I was not gifted with graphical design prowess and now everyone must suffer the consequences)

And again, once the voting for the first round of this bracket is complete, the next will be revealed, so on and so forth.

THE VOTING

Voting for the first bracket will begin on May 15th. Polls will be open for ONE WEEK, after which they will be closed, winners will be anounced, and voting for the next bracket will follow.

Voting for the third bracket will begin on June 23rd.

All polls are tagged with #tournament polls, and all polls will also be tagged with their respective bracket (e.g.: #side a poll).

THE LINKS

Here I will supply links to posts such as current brackets, current polls, etc. once they are published.

CURRENT BRACKET INFO

TOURNAMENT PLAYLISTS

PREVIOUS BRACKET INFO

Thank you all for your attention, and see you soon once voting begins!

[missacidburn928s-heathenhideaway]

Eff Being Friends

Steve Rogers x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”

? x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader “Ci”

Ex!Thor x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”

Ex!Loki x POC!Goddess!Avenger!Reader "Ci”

Wordcount: 4191

Summary:

To say the relationship between Steve and I was complicated would be an understatement. But I’m not the one to blame. That honor goes to Captain Indecision, himself. So why would he ever think I would make things easy for him?

Warnings:

18+ Only MDNI, Angsty with some mild smut and surprise feels.

Notes:

Heavily inspired by “Fuck Being Friends” by Jessie Reyes. I have this need to fuck with Steve. Also there be a twist abound. Who could the mystery person be?

Banner by @cafekitsune Divider by @firefly-graphics

Your off and on relationship with one Steven Grant Rogers, is once again off. This hot and cold shit is for the birds. If it weren’t for his dick game being almost magical you would have written him off a long time ago. Well that and you might possibly be in love with the fucker too.

When he’s not self-conscious and feeding into his own paranoia, things are great. It’s when he lets his intrusive thoughts and the opinions of others guide him that things take a turn.

Like when he starts acting a fool now that Thor is on the compound for a visit with Loki. Both of whom are technically your exes but as you’re gods you don’t hold the same morality standards when it comes to multiple partners. You were actively hooking up with both of them at the same time, ages ago.

It may have even become a bit of a competition between the brothers at one point.

So why should you shy away from all the wonderful flirty banter and not so innocent exchanges being thrown your way. Steve needs a reminder that you’re not from this realm and he can’t toy with you as such. Just because you’ve put up with his bullshit thus far, does not mean you will continue too.

Being green with envy serves him right.

Tony has gotten into the habit of throwing a game night once a month for ‘morale’ or whatever. Honestly, you think it’s just an excuse to get everyone shit faced enough to reveal or do embarrassing things so that Jarvis can hoard it all to be used later. Whatever the reason, you are more than excited this months is happening while the Asgardians are here.

You’ve been having the best week with them. Reminiscing the good ol days and creating some hot and heavy new memories to add to the list.

“Watching you surrender to my magic. Wrapped tight in my shadows. Is a sight that will never cease to amaze me. Offering up your body, the perfect altar, for me to worship. To show my own devotion through your surrender. A gift I have never taken for granted my dear. Steven really is quite the fool.” Loki professed before rendering you brainless and cock drunk for hours.

Steve’s eyes have been attached to your frame all night. Begging for you to give him some attention. But you pay him no mind. You’re preoccupied being very flirty and touchy feely with everyone.

Tony has decided that tonight’s game is Truth or Dare. It seems the man of iron is also enjoying watching the gods get under Steve’s skin.

You take every dare, and they get raunchier by the ask. You give Nat, who is sat next to Captain Cranky, a sultry little lap dance that ends in a heated kiss. Only to be broken up by Steve’s quiet growl.

On your next turn your dared to make Thor get a boner without touching him. You saunter behind the loveseat he is perched on. Leaning in so that you can whisper in his ear. You regale him with all the dirty things you love that he does to you. The way his lightning makes you sing like no other. All stated low enough for only the gods and the super soldiers to hear. Your mission is a success of course. Thor’s unable to hide the ‘hammer’ tenting his slacks as he pulls you over the back of couch onto his lap and bites down on your throat making you giggle.  

The game continues with Clint having to admit that he most certainly has seen his teammates getting it on when he has been up in the vents. “Some things you can’t unsee unfortunately.” He shivers.

Sam, having confessed who he thinks has the best ass, turns to you. “Truth or Dare Ci?”

“Dare of course. Why change it up now.”

“I dare you to get Loki to genuinely smile.”

You look at him quizzically. “You think you’re so smart. Prepare to be knocked down a peg or three bird boy.”

Standing you walk over to Loki, who has been leaning against the wall, observing all night. With a cheeky smile you wave your fingers and cloak yourselves in darkness that's not only soundproof but is also time spelled as well.

You lower to your knees and snap Loki’s pants out of existence. The visual of you before him is enough to turn his cock hard as steel in front of your very eyes. You waste no time attaching your lips to the foreskin covered tip. Teasing the sensitive flesh with your tongue before sinking down to the hilt. You pull out all the stops. Sucking his cock until he comes down your throat with a roar. Savoring every drop as he fills your belly.

Removing the spell, it seems to the room as if only 1 minute has passed. It does not go unnoticed that Loki is relaxed while he continues to lean against the wall. Grinning like a loon.

This is when Steve notices your slightly swollen lips and quiet panting. Having been on the receiving end of that look many a time, he seethes. Cracking the glass of whiskey in his hand.

You give your turn to Loki so that you may catch your breath. It’s no surprise to anyone that he chooses Steve. “Truth or Dare Captain?”

“Truth. I have nothing to hide.” He challenges the God of Mischief.

“Alright.” He glances at you quickly. Catching you subtly lick your lips, most likely still tasting of him, grinning to yourself. “When was the last time you got your cock properly serviced and with who?”

Everyone assumes the answer will be you when you were still together a couple weeks ago.

With a cocky grin and sip of his drink he answers as he stares you down. “Yesterday after training with Sharon. She caught me on my way to change in my room and said I looked tense and needed a release. I took her up on her offer. Plus she gives decent head.”

He must have thought that you were going to be upset that he let poor lovesick Sharon suck his dick instead of getting the best head of his life from you. You couldn’t care less actually.

Not when you were getting dicked down in your own post training bath with Thor. It really is a great way to help stretch out and relax your muscles.

“Good for you Steven. You always are so tense after a rough training session. I know I was. Thor helped sort me out though.” You sweetly state.

“Are you serious right now? You two were practically on the verge of killing each other in the training room.”

“Great foreplay. Don’t tell me you never partook in post battle coitus with her. She is ravenous after any kind of rough play.” Thor, the sweet himbo that he is, adds in.

“Fuck this. I’m going to bed.”

“Should I call Sharon to come lick your wounds?”

“Fuck you Ci”

“Sorry not tonight, Cap.”

In the state-of-the-art training room only Stark money could provide. Left to your own devices. You and Bucky are engaged in an intense sparring session.

Each move is calculated, precise, and born from years of relentless training. Bucky, a seasoned veteran, exudes an aura of quiet confidence and strength. While you, a woman of equal skill and determination, possess an uncanny ability to anticipate his every move.

As you grappled along the training matts, your bodies intertwined in a dance of submission and evasion. Knives glinted in the dim light, their edges a constant threat that kept you both on high alert.

On an instinct, you feigned a strike. Your body language, a masterpiece of your deception. In that split second, you seized the opportunity to swiftly maneuver behind the super soldier and lock him in a chokehold.

Triumph flashed in your eyes as you tightened your grip around his throat. Victory soon at hand.

But Bucky was not a man to be outdone. With a lightning-fast reversal, he spun on his heel, catching you off guard. His powerful muscles and Vibranium arm strained as he flipped you over, pinning you to the ground. A wry smile played on his lips as he secured his victory.

Though the training session had ended, the unspoken tension between the two of you lingered in the air.

“Still too cocky for your own good, Doll.”

“Are you ever going to get tired of saying that?”

“You ever gonna stop letting me best you?”

“And miss gazing into those icy blues of yours. I don’t think so. I’ve been a goner for them since the first time you laid eyes on me.”

The first time you met James Barnes was not in Germany like every likes to think. In fact, you had a prior and very intimate relationship with the Winter Soldier. You nursed him back to health long ago when he was still under Hydras thumb. He had wound up collapsed at your doorstep in the middle of nowhere when a mission went wrong and his handler died.

That was the first time he was able to begin remembering. You spent countless nights in front of the fire. Keeping each other warm as you explored these new feelings together. Keeping your skills sharp by engaging in sparring sessions that always ended up pressed flesh to flesh and covered in sweat. Helping him hold on to whatever memories would pop up. It was both sweet and dangerous.

When Hydra tripped your alarms, he begged you to just let him be retrieved. He couldn’t bare knowing any harm came to you because of him. So you let him go with a sweet kiss. But not before placing mark on his ribs that only other gods and those spelled to do so can see.

“You never told him did you?” You inquire.

“Neither did you.”

“I did it for your protection. You were on the run and I didn’t want anything to happen to you. It’s not my fault he went on the run for you. Who do you think helped him break everyone out and gave Shuri the extra juice to reverse those nasty words in your head.”

“I can’t keep watching him do this to you Ci. I’ve tried talking to him but he cant get it through his stubborn skull how good he has had it. I would give up my humanity to have you back again. I would never take you for granted. Hell, I’d happily let you keep him as a lover in our life if that’s what you so choose. I wouldn’t care who I had to share you with. Just as long as I had you.”

“James.” You whisper. “Take your shirt off.”

“What? Why?”

“Just do it please.”

As he does, the rest of the team file in along with Thor and Loki to run some training exercises of their own.

“Buck why do ya got your shirt off already pal?” Steve questions.

“I asked him to.” You deadpan.

“Why the hell would you do that for Ci? Don’t you have Thor and Loki to play with. Bucky is off limits.”

“I’m afraid that’s where you wrong Steven.”

Bucky looks at you with pleading eyes. Unfortunately you just don’t care to keep this secret anymore.

“James, lift your left arm and turn your side towards our team please.”

“Oh! Your finally going to do it. I was wondering how long, if ever, you were going to let them in on it.” Loki teases.

“On what?” Steve grits out.

“On this.” With a wave of your hand a symbol appears on Bucky's ribs. Glowing a soft golden light that matches your eyes. A chalice overflowing with wine.

“He already is mine. He has been for a quite some time. And will remain that way until he draws his last breath. Which wont be for a very long time as his soul is tied to mine.”

Bucky looks at you with confusion in his eyes. “You gave me your soul bond? Even though I was under Hydras control.”

“I did. It was what gave you the extra strength to endure and survive. I knew you would make it back to me one day. As an immortal I have all the time in the world to wait.”

“But you were with me when I brought him back here.” Steve blurts out.

“Well aren’t you the observant one Stevie. It changes nothing. If he had come to me that day and declared he wanted his place by side, he’d of had it in heartbeat. After a discussion between all of us of course. I’m not actually heartless. I just come off that way.”

“What the fuck Ci?! My best friend! You couldn’t tell me you had been with my best friend when he was brainwashed.”

“Watch your tongue, Rogers. You have no room to speak upon what I did or did not disclose to you. I wasn’t the one playing games with the others heart and emotions now was I.” You seethe.

“I asked her not to.” Bucky imparts. “I was free of Hydra, and we were rebuilding our friendship and I didn’t want to mess it up by intruding on what you had. I was just happy to be near her again and that she had someone I trusted by her side. But man was I wrong. What the hell happened to you Steve? Little Stevie from Brooklyn would have never treated a dame, let alone a goddess, the way you have Ci.”

“Don’t try and turn the blame on me Buck. You could have told me you’d been with her. We shared girls before back when I couldn’t get any on my own. What was so different with her?”

The team looks at each other after that comment with curious brows.

“Because she means more to me than just sex and that is what you would have reduced it to. I told myself, I would either get to have her fully, out in the open or not at all. Keeping my love tucked in the shadows.”

“So you’re the only one who can love her?” Steve shouts.

You clear my throat. “Ahem. You gave up that right when you kicked me to the curb yet again two weeks ago.”

“That doesn’t mean I don’t love you. I just get all lost in my head thinking about starting a family and how would that even be possible with a goddess if I couldn’t even get my dance with Peggy. Then I get angry and need space so I just end it so I can really think things through. I always come back though, Doll. Always.”

“Wooow.” Tony says with a clap. “Capsicle really stuck his foot in it this time.”

“So, your telling me, that instead of just having a conversation about what’s prattling around in that stubborn ass head of yours you thought it prudent to just break up with me then turn around and ask for me to take you back time and time again?” Your eyes alight with golden fire as your temperature raises.

“Avengers, I’d advise you to get behind me and Thor for your safety. I’ve only ever seen her this angry a handful of times and it usually does not end well.” Loki nonchalantly states.

“Yes. No. I-I don’t know. I was confused okay!” He shouts back. “Needed to work some shit out.”

“And that required you to be between Sharon's thighs and any attractive woman who gave you the time of day?”

“Well no, not exactly. That just helped me shut my brain off. But it never felt as good as being inside you.”

“Well, congrats to me for having such good pussy. Why is that though? Does my pussy beat better than my heart does? Boy, please, you aren’t blind. Your too smart for that lie.”

“I’m an idiot when it comes to women and love in general okay. Give me a fight and I know exactly what to do. But love? I’m clueless.”

“Don’t expect pity from me for you playing with my heart. I gave you more than enough room to grow and explore and figure things out as they came. It’s not my fault you chose to throw those things in my face. It is my fault for taking you back so many times though. Especially after Bucky arrived. But he wanted to stay loyal to you. His oldest pal. So I catered to his wishes. Even if it ended up to my detriment.”

“Seemed to be doing just fine to me while you were hooking up with Loki and Thor.”

“My Godly exes. Who I was in a relationship with a millennia ago in another realm. Men who I trust enough with my body to understand that carnal pleasure is all I am able to afford them at this time?”

“Makes no difference to me. Not when you were parading it around. I now can only imagine how it made Buck feel.”

“Didn’t bother me. I know all about how their relationships worked. Gods are different. She’s not in love with them like that. Not anymore at least. They were no threat to me. Plus I was still staying in the shadows.”

“Also.” Thor interrupts. “That lovely little soul bound symbol along Barnes’ ribs can only be seen by other Gods and anyone the bond holder deems fit to see it. So we already knew where at least half of her heart was held. Plus she is such a great lover. I never pass up the chance for such pleasure when I am afforded it.”

“Aye Aye” Loki agrees.

Steve throws his hands up and storms off. Most likely to go ruin a punching bag or five.

Bucky takes the opportunity to embrace you in front of everyone. At his acceptance of your claim, gold and black lines appear on your left shoulder. Matching the pattern of his Vibranium arm.

“Seems the bond has formerly been reciprocated. Welcome to Immortality White Wolf.”

“What are we going to do about Steve?”

“Let him go pout or fuck or whatever he needs to do. When he’s calmed down, we’ll have a conversation and figure out if he deserves a place by our side. You do have a very very long life ahead of you now.”

“Oh he has a looong way to go before I’m okay with letting him get close to you like that again. I think you gave him far too many chances.”

“I gave you a chance from the start didn’t I. Wasn’t planning to fall so quickly or for you to have such an impact on me but sometimes the fates like to play games.”

“Doesn’t help when you spell their lovers for making a pass at you.” Loki discloses.

“Excuse me, but I was spelled for my protection. If they had tried to keep their hands to themselves nothing would have happened to them.” You defend. “And If I remember correctly, you benefitted that night from the spell as well. Bedding down 3 fates at once is quite a feat. You’re welcome.”

Loki grins that devilish smile. “I’d be happy to show you my gratitude once more.”

After family dinner later that night…

“Are you serious Steve? You can’t possibly be serious right now. Who the fuck gave you the right to even speak with such vitriol on your tongue about him? He may care about maintaining his salvaged reputation but honey I am a whole mess of I don’t give a fuck. There is nothing you can do or say to me that I haven’t already done to myself. So come on. Try me. I love stupid games. I always come up with the best prizes.”

“Doll, you don’t need to do this. I’m okay. Steve's just hurting.”

“Like hell you are James. I know that look in your eyes and I’m not okay with it. Everything inside of me wants to make a scene right now. To bring America’s Golden Boy to his knees. But I know you don’t want that. So, this is the best solution.”

“Oh, wow. You need the goddess to fight your battles for you now Buck. Just look at you pussy whipped already. I must say I much preferred when I didn’t know you had had my woman before me.” The angry blonde spouts off.

That was it. That what the last nail in his soon to be coffin. Your shoulders relaxed, as a calmness took over. You turned to smile sweetly at the group of hero’s lounging around you in the common room. “If you’ll excuse me.”

You rise to your feet. Bucky reaches out with his metal arm, giving your hand a squeeze and looking into your almost vacant eyes. “Doll?”

You just squeeze his hand back before releasing it and starting to walk away. You could hear Steve’s teeth clenching as he bites down on his jaw. A quiet had settled within the room.

“Sure can dish it out. Too bad you can’t ta-“

That was all he was able to make out before your hand tightened around his windpipe. No one moved to help the hero.

“What was that? We’re you going to imply that I couldn’t take it. Tsk tsk tsk.” You make sure to dig your nails in, allowing little rivulets of crimson to take the course of gravity and stain is alabaster skin.

His eyes begin frantically searching the faces of his friends around him. Surely someone would come to his aid. He was the leader of the team wasn’t he.

“Oh, they won’t help you my dear. As you know I’m not exactly mortal. And therefore, even with all their nifty enhancements. They are no match for me. Expect Wanda. Although I really don’t want to know the truth to that. I very much like the Scarlet Witch.”

You allow him to take a quick breath and he squeaks out. “Thor. Loki.”

“My demi god exes?” You start to laugh. “You think the can or will save you?”

He nods.

“Oh you poor unfortunate soul. That’s not going to happen. You see, I can control the elements and well all that lovely Thunder can be rendered useless with a snap of my fingers. I’m also the mother of magic. Only one close to me is Freya. Loki’s magic technically stems from me.”

You turn to the blonde Adonis and dark prince with a smile. “I wouldn’t do anything to you without just cause. You know that.” You send them a wink and they beam a smile your way.

“Doll, he’s starting to turn red.” Bucky states.

“Oops.” You loosen the pressure on his windpipe but keep your hand firmly in place around his thick and bleeding neck.

“I think it’s due time for you to retire to your wing for the night Captain. Wouldn’t want anything to happen to you that can’t be reversed.”

You take a step back, releasing him. Watching as he clutches his neck. Eyes brimming with hurt and anger.

You lean forward and run your tongue along an errant trail of his life force. Making sure he watches as you trace it along your lips, before pulling it into your mouth and swallowing. With the snap of your crimson covered fingers all traces of blood disappear.

“Now run along. And remember,” You step forward so that you may whisper in his ear. “This was but a warning. It would more than please me for you to fuck around and find out what I would do if you slight what is mine again.” You place a kiss to his cheek and return to your White Wolf.

Everyone watches on as he huffs and puffs. Stomping towards the elevators.

Everyone except for Bucky. He only has eyes for you.

He pulls you down to straddle his lap. You can feel exactly what that little display of your power used against his best friend did to him pushing against his zipper. His flesh hand grips your hip tightly as his metal thumb runs along your bottom lip. “Say goodnight to our friends, Doll.”

“Why? Steve’s gone. We can enjoy the rest of our evening in peace now.”

“Say goodnight, георгин. Unless you want our friends to see you get fucked stupid.”

You bite your lip and maintain eye contact with his steel greys. “Goodnight, Earth’s mightiest.”

He grips your thighs tight and rises from his seat. Heading for the elevators. “Tony, up the sound proofing for our floor. Oh and can you funnel the audio to my Asshole best friends room as well.”

“Damn that’s pouring lemon and salt into the wound.” Clint quips.

Tony messes with a screen on his watch for a moment. “Done and done terminator. Try not to break too much furniture this time please. I’m gonna have to start a tab soon with you two.”

Before the elevator doors can fully close you shout out. “What’s the fun in that!”

[strawberrystepmom]

a little bitty senator nanami, pilot haibara (and yuuji), and princess reader friendship moment. they're truly a trio in all of my au's :( the triple p :(((( part of the jjk star wars au. wc 698.

divider thanks to @/saradika!

“Do you have any idea how difficult you make my job?”

Kento’s voice makes you laugh as you push the helmet you were just wearing off of your head the rest of the way, Haibara behind you with both hands out to grab it as you tip your head and let it fall. He catches it with an exaggerated “oof” and your laughter continues as your regal friend approaches, dressed in finery that means he must have come straight back from Coruscant to the Resistance Base. 

“What do you mean, Senator?”

He scoffs and rolls his eyes even as Haibara envelops him in a hug, his own dark hair mussed from his helmet. His orange flight suit is halfway unzipped, revealing the white shirt beneath it, and you can tell despite his visible annoyance that Senator Nanami is nothing short of happy to see his old friend.

“They know you’ve been fooling around out here and they aren’t pleased,” he sniffs while clapping the shoulder of the man hugging him. You join them quickly, throwing your arms around both men and pressing your cheek against Yu’s back. It feels good for the trio to be reunited - the princess, the pilot, the politician. The three of you have been a package deal for a long time.

“What do you mean fooling around? I’m trying to get us organized enough to keep everyone from dying! The least they can do is keep their opinions to themselves from their towers in the sky.”

The young pilot who often rides alongside Haibara gives the three of you space but you can tell he’s listening in on the conversation based off of the way his pink hair sticks up over the top of the plane’s wing, pretending to wrench away at a stalling rocket booster. You don’t dismiss the young man, Yuuji, but instead let him listen in. He has as much of a right to know where the Senate stands on your ever growing rebellion as anyone in this hangar does.

“As correct as you may be, Princess,” you hear the sarcasm drip from Nanami’s voice with the use of your title and it’s your turn to roll your eyes. “They aren’t impressed and support is flagging.”

Sighing, you back away from the two men and put your hands on your hips. 

“Well maybe we can do it without them.”

The dark haired man nods in agreement.

“We don’t need them as long as we have other ways to get supplies, right? Tsukumo is still doing runs for us as far as I know.”

Raising your brows, you further consider how far you could go without the sympathy of the Senate before Nanami sighs, defeated.

“There’s no reasoning with you two hopeless dreamers, is there?”

This makes Yuuji laugh and you hear him quickly silence himself, pretending again to hit the edge of a wrench against the metal of the ship but you peek around the front of the ship to look at him. He grins, bright and boyish, and you smile back.

“What do you think we should do, Itadori?”

The young man stands at attention after hearing his name spoken so formally by the woman that is technically his commander but you hold your hand out indicating the formality isn’t necessary. You watch as he relaxes and begins to slap the wrench against the heel of his hand, thinking as he looks around the hangar.

“I think we should keep on as we are, Princess. We have the utmost faith in you.”

Nodding, you accept his answer and turn to raise your eyebrows in Nanami’s direction who simply pinches the bridge of his nose between his index and forefinger. 

“And I have faith in you, Yuuji. Keep up the good work.”

Another grin spreads across his face and Haibara rounds the ship to join him in tinkering, giving you and Kento a moment to speak freely amongst one another.

“You’ve ensured that you’re surrounded by many fellow hopeless dreamers, haven’t you?”

Shrugging, you simply reach up and pinch his cheek the same way you did when you were children attending school together.

“I think they’ve made their way to me.”

[balanceoflightanddark]

Avatar the Last Airbender Netflix Episode 2- "Warriors"

Well, things took a bit of a downward turn.

It started off reasonably well enough. Aang buries Monk Gyatso and gives him a proper send-off. Again, I do like that his bond with Gyatso is a driving force for his character. Even introduces new stuff like his initial problems with training with Katara since he never trained with anyone outside of Gyatso before. Particularly since an ongoing subplot is his inability to control his bending abilities sort of caused him to latch onto his father figure. While I'm not exactly on board with "other kids being afraid of Aang" before he was revealed to be the Avatar, I do think it feels like an extension. Like maybe once he gained control, he made friends again like in the cartoon.

Thus, without Gyatso there to guide him, he feels more lost. Particularly with his duties as the Avatar. So he has a good solid foundation to go to Kyoshi Island this time around since he feels he needs the wisdom of a previous Avatar in order to find his place in the world and whatnot.

...we'll get to Kyoshi's "wisdom" in a moment, but for now, just know that I'm not a fan of how she was handled.

Now on to the Kyoshi Warriors, who are fan (Azula snickers) favorites for obvious reasons. On the one hand, I do like that they addressed how their isolationism has caused problems for Suki and the island. That lack of contact with the outside world has left them with little options other than keeping their heads down while the Fire Nation basically stomps everywhere else. Again, this feels true to the original series. The Fire Nation preyed on that disunity between the Nations to get such a huge advantage. Divide and conquer so to say. Hell, we see that in action with Zhao pushing Zuko to work with him to capture the Avatar instead of being a lone wolf and chasing after glory like Zuko has been doing (only thing done well with Zhao in this episode if I might add). This is in contrast with Suki's mother being reluctant to harbor Aang, Sokka, and Katara, wanting them to leave as soon as possible. You get why wanting them to leave is a priority, but you also know that you can't exactly run forever and keep your heads to the ground without fighting.

...and here's where I start to run into problems.

Let's start with Sokka and Suki for starters. I know a lot of people were angry about Sokka not being sexist this time around. I was not, but probably for different reasons than most. The idea of sexism in the Water Tribes is based on Native American stereotypes. For a series that's supposed to be about anti-colonialism and breaking those very stereotypes, that's a big red flag. With that in mind, I'm not against Sokka not having it.

I will get to the sexism thing later though, around when we get to Pakku and the North, but toning it down here was not the issue.

What IS is how Sokka's struggle with leadership is portrayed here. Again, this is a reasonable extension of the original series and I have no problems with it. Hell, I could see it as a pretty good developing point for Sokka. Problem is...I don't think it went far enough. Sokka is presented here as being aware of his inadequacies as a leader and a warrior. Yet, he's not really challenged either. Suki doesn't really do a whole lot aside from ogle him and tell him he's better than he think he is. Which sort of falls into the trap of Suki being reduced to Sokka's girlfriend in my opinion. I know she has that subplot of wanting to see the outside more and all, but then we have scenes where it's implied that she's too hard on Sokka for beating him?

Okay, let's take a step back for a moment. Removing the sexism angle, part of Sokka's flaws in the original was his pride. He thought he could take Zuko when he obviously couldn't. He demeaned the Kyoshi Warrior despite them beating him. The whole purpose was that he was using his pride to cover up his insecurities about being a nonbender and his doubts about being a leader. Yet at the same time, it was that pride that prevented him from actually confronting his flaws and growing as a person. Suki's purpose in the original was to help him swallow his pride, and thus allow him to grow to become a better warrior. He adopted her customs with humility, and he became a better fighter as a result.

Here? Nothing. He doesn't even adopt the Kyoshi Warrior uniform (which considering one of the problems plaguing the world is division amongst allies is a HUGE missed opportunity), nor do we learn of their values outside of protecting people. Which in a 45 minute episode, boggles the mind about how they couldn't fit that in. Instead we just get a more generic "you're better than you think you are" without deconstructing why Sokka needs that message. He doesn't really learn humility here, just that he needs to be better. That doesn't really address his problems outside of slapping a band aid on it.

Speaking of bad advice...Kyoshi.

I HATED what they did with Kyoshi. I understand that she's not the most compassionate Avatar, but it feels like they ran with her "murder" portrayal the fandom gave her. Her advice to Aang about being a warrior was accepting that things will get bloody, but he shouldn't run from his duty. Yeah. Right. Apparently the only way to fight fire is with fire I guess. Her message of "being merciless" is the exact same doctrine the Fire Nation runs on. Something that is highlighted when Zhao threatens to burn civilians. And it doesn't even make sense from her perspective since she takes down Zhao's soldiers without killing any of them.

Forgive me, but while Kyoshi is somewhat correct that things will get worse, the answer isn't to get meaner and more ruthless as a result. Which honestly comes as a surprise since they bothered to include her backstory from her novels, but forgot that part of her journey was realizing that she needed to be more than some ruthless thug and instilling fear lest she run the risk of becoming like Jianzhu. And she should've known that tearing down a scared kid for running away won't do any good since SHE was a scared kid who initially ran from her duty as the Avatar. It just made her look like a colossal hypocrite.

sighs

Sorry. Kyoshi in the original and in the novels was one of my favorite past Avatars. I'm just insulted they basically made her fanon self canon when she's more than that.

Finally...Zhao. I'm not a fan of how he's the one to burn down Kyoshi Island instead of Zuko. Mainly because it made him look like a colossal idiot. He knows there's an Avatar running around and he only brings A SINGLE SHIP? What's more, he knows about what Kyoshi Island was doing and presumably knows how formidable the Warriors are. Why wouldn't he bring back up in case things heat up? His men don't even outnumber Suki's!

What's worse is that they got some of him down okay. He was wily enough to figure out that Zuko was looking for the Avatar and where Aang was on few clues. So why's he that incompetent here since by all accounts, he should know better? Was the message here that the Fire Nation aren't as powerful as they appear, so Sokka and Aang just need to man up and fight? Then how the hell did the Fire Nation get so close to winning the war in the first place?

...yeah, this episode was a bit of a step down. The kid playing Aang continues to help carry this thing, but honestly, if they can't even get one of the past Avatars right and deconstruct the ruthless attitude of the Fire Nation where it should be needed in this case, I'm not feeling confident for the third episode.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Hi. :D

Regarding the ending, it seems like the fandom divided about Marinette's decision to hide the truth from Adrien. I've seen group of people believing the lie is the result of her being manipulated by Gabriel, there's other who said that it's in character for Marinette to control information and compare it to what she did in Bubbler episode and there's also people who believe that the lie is a result of the wish that make Marinette's memory become blurry hence why she believed that Gabriel and Monarque are two different people.

What about you? What do you think about Marinette decision? What could be reasoning?

Thank you and I'm sorry for grammar error. ;;

My personal opinion is that it's all the result of bad writing, making it impossible to guess Marinette's motivation. If/when her motivation is revealed, I'm guessing it's going to make about as much sense as Alya knowing who Ladybug is and still believing Lila. To show you what I mean, I'll just go through the arguments you bring up one-by-one and explain why they don't hold much water.

Gabriel Manipulating Marinette

For this point to make sense, Gabriel needed to actually manipulate Marinette, but that's not what we see. He makes a dying request of her, but nothing in the fight or the season backs up her caring about that request. The lead up to the wish is largely Bugnoir and Monarch in a verbal sparing match that looks something like this:

Bug Noire: You'd know this if you ever took an interest in him. But in reality, Adrien means NOTHING to you anymore! You've locked him in your house — LOCKED him in your Alliance rings! Locked him into a life that allows you to hide behind him in order to justify YOUR madness! Lucky Charm!! (summons a tube of glue) Monarch: All I want is for him to be happy

Oh yeah, she's being so manipulated here! Gabriel is totally changing her mind about everything! That's why the fight literally ends with Gabriel changing his mind and making a different wish than originally intended! That's how manipulation works, right?

If the message of this fight was supposed to be that Gabriel manipulated Marinette and not the other way around, then it would need to look something like this comic where he guilts her into keeping his secrets. It would need look like this because Gabriel and Marinette have nothing close to a positive relationship. They hate each other. They also know next to nothing about each other, which is why the fight's dialogue is nothing but exposition and squabbling over who knows Adrien better as Adrien is literally their only connection.

This is why the only manipulation that would work on Marinette is guilt tripping her about the reveal hurting Adrien because Marinette doesn't give two shits about Gabriel. But Gabriel doesn't do that. He just politely asks her to not tell Adrien:

Gabriel: (turns around to Marinette) Marinette, make sure that Adrien never knows about the villain that I was, (puts down the twin rings on the ground) but instead, that he remembers the times I tried to be a good father. (turns back to Gimmi)

This is not manipulation. He's not messing with her emotions. He doesn't say anything like, "telling Adrien will hurt him immensely Marinette. If you love him, you'll let him remember me as a loving father." He just makes a request of a young woman who hates him and hopes for the best.

If Marinette loved Gabriel and was heartbroken that he was her enemy, then his dying wish could be argued to be a form of manipulation because he knows how much she cares for him and how much his actions hurt her and how much she doesn't want to remember him as a villain, but that's not what the writers wrote. Instead, they gave us things like the pancake scenes and Gabriel trying to break Adrienette up with magic.

Marinette likes Controlling Information

I've talked about the scarf thing and Marinette's general tendency toward secret keeping before. My general thoughts are that there is no point in the show where Marinette is shown to like keeping secrets or controlling information. She only ever keeps secrets that arguably should be kept. The show has also never put her in a situation where she has an ongoing lie that actively hurts someone.

You may be thinking about the scarf thing as a counter argument, but for that to be an indication of how she handles ongoing lies, it would need to be an ongoing lie in the actual narrative and not just the fandom. As is, the scarf appeared in one episode and was then forgotten by the show. The scarf lie was also a split-second decision made without any knowledge of why the lie even happened.

If Adrien wore the scarf all the time and talked about how much it meant to him that his father had gotten him such a wonderful gift, then I'd agree with you that the scarf sets Marinette up as the type of person who might keep the senti thing a secret. But that's not what the show actually does. She's never confronted with this lie again. At this point, it would honestly be weird for her to bring it up.

I'm sure someone is reading this and thinking about the Chat Blanc thing, but the narrative treats that episode in such a confusing way that I don't even know how to approach it. A lot of people thought that it was the thing driving the season four conflict, but that doesn't actually seem to be the case because revealing it wasn't part of resolving the season four conflict. Marinette also doesn't seem to have any trauma around Chat Blanc. Instead - somehow - Adrien does even though he doesn't know it happened and I just... what?

At the very least, I think that we can all acknowledge that telling your partner that he ended the world in an alternate timeline that will now never exist and whose cause you do not know has, at best, questionable benefits. The only reason I wanted Marinette to tell him was because I thought that it was affecting her and because, in certain circumstances, telling him could have lead to Gabriel's defeat and I like poetic justice.

But if Chat Blanc isn't affecting Marinette, then telling Chat Noir is kinda pointless since there's nothing that he can do about it as far as she knows. It could even be arguably seen as cruel. I don't think that Marinette needs to tell her partner every awful thing that he does when the akuma of the day controls him because none of it is his fault and he can't change the past. Telling him just feels like guilt tripping. Given canon's wacky writing, a Chat Blanc reveal is just that on a larger scale.

I honestly can't think of anything else we could call an ongoing lie outside of the secret identities and general miraculous stuff. The senti thing is Marinette's first real harmful ongoing lie and it's one that she actively planned, too, since she would have had time to gather her thoughts before she sees Adrien. I truly don't think that it fits her character, especially since Adrien isn't shown to be in mourning.

I'm not saying that this would be an easy thing to tell him, I'm just saying that it really doesn't fit her character to choose to lie. Even if you disagree with my above arguments and say that the scarf and Chat Blanc were setups for this, canon itself has given Marinette an arc about being less controlling.

In season five we have the stuff with Lila where the whole "high road" thing was proven to be a bad call. And, Chat Blanc or not, season four ended with her saying this:

Ladybug: Why don't you just give up on me? I've lost ALL the Miraculous! I'm the worst Guardian EVER! I wanted to control everything, I didn't listen to you, I lied to you, I kept you at a distance! Every time you offered me a helping hand, I never took it! I really made a mess of EVERYTHING! (continues sobbing)

So what was the point of that if she still "tries to control everything"? (Even though I'd argue that she didn't. A lot of this rant isn't actually backed up by what we see happening in season four, but it's still the lesson that the writers chose to have her openly state she learned.)

In summary, Marinette has never been big on lying unless she has to and she's supposedly had an arc about not being controlling, so either this isn't it or she's learned nothing and season four was an even bigger waste of time than I already thought it was.

The Wish Did It

This is arguably the most plausible scenario, but if we go this route, then it's still bad writing because the wish rewrites the universe so there's no way to discover "the truth" because it isn't the truth anymore. Whatever Gabriel changed is now reality and the only way to make that not so is to retcon how the wish works. And if they're reconning that, well, how can you trust anything the show tells you about the lore?

The reason why consistent world building and characterization are so important is because it's the foundation on which stories are built. The puzzle pieces that fit together to create the cohesive whole. If your puzzle pieces don't fit together, then you are telling a story that the audience cannot logically follow and that is generally considered to be objectively bad storytelling unless you're writing literary nonsense like Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. (Yes that's an actual genre.)

In Summary

Like I said at the top, this all just feels like bad writing to me. It's not the natural next chapter in the story. It actively goes against past characterization and supposed character arcs, but that's hardly shocking. Throughout the show, we've seen the writers do whatever the hell they want to make a plot work, ignoring their own lore in the process. I don't expect that to change and neither should you.

The Alya and Lila thing is my go-to example because it's the most glaring indication of what you should expect to see in this show. If a reporter who actively reported that Lila is Ladybug's best friend will not be swayed by learning that Ladybug is someone who actively hates Lila, then it is pointless to try to make sense of the writing. Trying to logically guess where it's going next or what a character is going to do is an exercise in madness because that's not how Miraculous works.

It's why I haven't weighed in on what the wish will mean for season six. The wish will mean whatever the hell the writers decide it means no matter what the previous five seasons contained. It's also why this blog largely focuses on discussing canon's existing flaws and ways that you could potentially fix them. That's the stuff I really enjoy and find value in. Theory crafting only works for media that is logically solid and consistent. Asks like yours are still welcome! Just know that they're going to bring out my most cynical, judgemental side.

[ariadnejoly]

I unapologetically love Girls

Yes, I'm bi, 😝 But I also love Girls, the comedy-drama series. The general opinion I see online is: most people can't stand to watch it. It's cringe. It makes them uncomfortable. For one reason or another, many haven't watched it. I would like to share my love for the show and what it means to me.

The glory of Adam Driver. Getting the obvious out of the way. He has always been gifted, this man who evokes such a raw and vulnerable edge. He is compelling, point blank, and this show acts as a long form story where he not only stuck around as one of the ensemble cast, but his character's evolution over the entire six seasons is a beautiful and subtle performance. I remember being surprised and delighted that Dunham didn't write out his character after a breakup, as they might do on say, Sex and the City. Adam Sackler hung around and became a core member of the group. Everyone else noticed his talent too, which is why Kathleen Kennedy snapped him up to play Kylo Ren in Star Wars. Girls gave me Adam Driver and I felt right at home in Star Wars with him. He's given his all to everything he's ever done. He is the actor of our generation. And he didn't get his breakthrough on the stage, or his episode of Law and Order. It was on Girls. But I don't need to brag. Just watch the show to see the absolutely feral and filthy fuckboi he starts out as. Watching it purely for Adam Driver will be worth it, and you might just end up liking other parts of the show, too.

It subverted my expectations constantly. And that's a good thing! People (me included) expected this new, anticipated show to be the Millennial Sex and the City. And I mean, there is sex, and there is Brooklyn, but this show goes in all different directions AND keeps up with male characters. See point 1 above. Adam, Elijah, Ray, and even dear, dysfunctional Desi round out the ensemble cast of women. As a long-time fan of Sex and the City, that show uses the Kens as ornaments, only utilized for sex and jokes, and breakups. The women don't talk about anything but the men they're dating. And guess what? That's fine! It is what it is. And I fuggin love that show --it was so formative for my 17 year old self. But then my 22 year old self watched the first season of Girls and was blown away by the way Dunham and the other creatives firmly planted their heels as an entirely different show that was not to be compared to anything that came before. These characters are complicated and deeply flawed. And at many times, unlikeable. But the writing is good. There's always one or two "bottle" episodes per season where characters are on a trip back to their hometown (season 1, episode 6), or the absolutely heartwrenching Marnie adventure in season 5 episode 6. I have many more examples I could give (Honorable mention to season 3 episode 9!). These episodes reveal another layer of complexity to each character in a way that feels lived in, possible, real. There's specificity and sharp wit. Characters often have a turbulent epiphany about their life in these bottle episodes, one that's usually scary to admit and confront. One of my favorite episodes is Hello Kitty (season 5 episode 7). It has so many moving parts, the play in the apartment building, the horrifying true story the play is based on...and yet that episode is so fun to watch. Beautifully written and directed. It has stayed deeply rooted in my mind as a piece of magic. This show has plot lines that are controversial and will absolutely divide people. It's not so middle of the road that it's blah, that’s for sure. It's irreverent and at times, utterly troubling. It makes you question your own character a little deeper. And that's why I keep coming back to study the show again and again.

Girls made me uncomfortable and cringe the first time I watched it. I was indeed like all the rest of the critics, appalled at Lena Dunham's flagrant nudity (I was from a Mormon town and had recently escaped the cult myself). Lena's body looked different than that one, victoria's secret model-type that we are all familiar with. Dunham's lack of shame horrified me and intrigued me. It tickled some deep part of my brain that yearned for the same liberation. But more than that, it was the scary way I related to the character within the first three episodes. Hannah is an aspiring writer who's 'bigger' than her friends. She hopes to be the voice of a generation. She wants to write a memoir. She’s just unkempt enough that no one takes her seriously. I was slack jawed after the pilot. I'd been watching myself on screen, for what felt like the first time ever. I staggered away from the tv and the episode rolled around in my brain, until a week went by and it was time for another episode. I'd just undergone a LEEP procedure to remove pre-cancerous cells from my cervix because I'd contracted HPV. Then episode 3 was about Hannah tracking down the boy who gave her HPV. Only to find out the ex she hooked up with that one time is gay. And yet again, it was like Lena Dunham was writing my life. Dating the gay boy who's a musical theatre aficionado? Yep. Me, Hannah, and Lady Bird. Hannah Horvath's life diverged from mine with every subsequent episode, but come on. If you were me, you would have been hooked too. Each season, no matter how batshit any character was, no matter what they did, I tuned in. And even though I was outraged when Hannah quit safe, secure jobs, like GQ (that allowed her to interview Patti LuPone!), it was really just me projecting my own money concerns. And when I cringed at her nude body, it was really just my own fatphobia and insecurity that I am still unlearning to this day. The writers of the show decided to make the characters self-sabotage in order to create comedy and drama. Hannah doesn't conform or stay quiet or people please to survive, like I had to. Watching Hannah and the girls became more of a “what not to do.” Back then I was comforted that while life was hard, at least I wasn't fucking up as badly as Hannah Horvath. Now I can laugh at the silliness and hijinks. It's all just good, fictional fun when you're past the poverty and crippling self-doubt of your twenties.

My thoughts on my body (and Hannah Horvath's) have changed. And that's the best thing of all. I rewatched Girls in 2022, a ten-year anniversary sort of thing. Wow. I saw it with different eyes. The eyes of someone older, wiser, happier. I watched it as a 32 year old, two years into my healing journey with my mind, body, and with food. And I see Girls in a new way. I see Hannah's body. It's straight out of Renaissance portraits. She is beautiful because she is real. I am also beautiful, and real. And so are you. Our bodies allow us to do and experience so many things. I'm grateful for the one I have. The culture in the 2010's was absolutely fat-shaming and misogynistic. When Dunham did press interviews, she deserved to be asked about her writing and directing, not why she was nude. And even when I wasn't ready to see Dunham's body (because I was still living in the fantasy that if I just did the next diet, I could finally be thin and look like the girls in the media), I am so glad Lena showed her real body and now that shit is immortalized in the Library of Congress. Good for her.

Girls shows some hard realities, for worse or better. The girls don't make lifelong vows to always remain friends. It's not a soulmate, forever Sunday brunch kinda thing. In fact, the show distances them all from one another over the last few seasons and at the end, gives them a sendoff in which they agree to float away from each other, more or less. And that's the true reality of some friendships, especially in your twenties. People will come and go throughout all of your life. It's a certainty. This show was creatively driven by a 24 year old woman, who was showing us the reality of adult life as a young person in a deeply corrupt, capitalistic system. A shitty recession where being an unpaid intern is legal. Getting felt up by your boss is tolerated by women in the office for the sake of financial security. Not eating to save money, hoping that boy texts you back, licking Cool Whip from the back of the spoon, avoiding the reality of your student loans. C'est la vie.

[iztarshi]

Not me coming up with a rough outline for what I'd do with a TMNT iteration. Much of this is just me throwing in all the ideas I'd like to play with and then dividing them by which ones work well together.

Season One:

Shredder and Krang trying to bring the technodrome through and take over the world. Less a new plot every week and more ongoing attempts to bring it through while the turtles and April try to figure out what he’s up to.

I think the turtles have to reveal themselves fairly early (long before the technodrome arrives at the end of the season) and there’s some wrangling back and forth with public image between Shredder and April. Shredder’s better at swaying public opinion than he is in 87, although he’s not the smooth operator Ch’rell is so much as a bombastic storyteller.

Punk frogs, maybe? Could cross over with Shredder trying to frame the turtles. They’d be convinced over the turtles’ side by the end of the season but would be interesting to have them as Shredder's team for a while.

Winter is a massive problem, the turtles have never had to stay awake during the cold weather before, so a lot of focus is on them struggling to fight crime while being cold-blooded. The farmhouse arc does happen, with Leo’s coma being as much brumation as injury since he was left outside in the cold. Might be a fun place to use box turtles being able to revive after seemingly freezing to death.

Defeating the technodrome at the end and sending it back to Dimension X.

Season Two:

After learning that Shredder and Krang can make forays into this dimension from Dimension X the turtles decide to take the battle to them before winter arrives again and go to Dimension X themselves. The war between the Federation and the Triceratons is going on here. The turtles start off in Federation territory, where they meet the Fugitoid and some pacifist Federation teenagers who call themselves the Neutrinos.

After escaping Federation Territory into Triceraton territory, the turtles learn that the Triceratons lead an alliance of reptiloid species and the turtles fit in surprisingly well in their territory. The difference between how they are treated and how the Neutrinos and the Fugitoid are treated gives the turtles a taste of being on the other side of privilege and acceptance for once.

Eventually they have to escape from the Triceratons as well and get the Fugitoid to safety.

Triceratons may attempt to invade Earth in the finale?

Season Three

Shredder and/or Bishop (because I don’t want to involve Lord Dregg) manage to turn public opinion against mutants.

Draxum, a mutant karakul ram, has created HAVOC to fight back. He's also secretly responsible for the mutation of a lot of its human-to-mutant members (the animals, which are the ones he really identifies with as a sheep himself, being mostly the result of Shredder and Krang creating mutants as distractions or to stir up anti-mutant sentiment). This is where the turtles meet Mona Lisa and maybe Mondo Gecko. They already know Leatherhead as an enemy but she (based on 87 but female because I wanted the maternal instincts as a background alligator thing) is here too.

Mostly I want to do HAVOC better than 87 did, because that's an interesting idea, but apparently the mutants had all been made against their will, knew that, and still supported Titanus?

Mona Lisa is instrumental in figuring out what Draxum is up to and joins the turtles' team afterwards. Mondo cares and will help out but remains less of a fighter.

Shredder and Krang need to be properly defeated (killed? depends how the tone of this turns out, but they’re really hard to get rid of alive) at the end and their lies revealed. Draxum’s lies, on the other hand, may be best not revealed (except to the mutants he created) if we don’t want anti-mutant sentiment to get even worse.

[purplefangirl42]

I see you've done Sheriff Hunter before and I'd love to see a bit where he gets shot in some fool hardy shootout and the reader has to convince him to let them help him 😁😁😁😁

Thank you!

Thanks for the request! I'm sorry this took so long and hope you can enjoy this as a holiday surprise! It ended up being way longer than I originally intended. It is a continuation of the previous Sheriff Hunter piece I did before! Divider by saradika

Tags: Western AU, slight angst, gun violence, injury and death mentions

Things after your accidental trek across the desert were much less exciting. You decided to settle down in the town that you had ended up at in your travels, not wishing to go any further and risk another incident. You had been sad to see your friend go, but were happy that she and her family were moving onto better things.

Over time, you developed relationships with the people in town and started to become part of the community. The Sheriff and his family welcomed you with open arms every time you stopped by to visit them. The youngest, a girl named Omega, was overly fond of you and loved to tell you stories of how things were before you arrived.

However, every time the subject veered in the direction of their missing brother, who’s name you had learned was Crosshair, Hunter would change the subject and ask Omega to talk about something else. It seemed that he did not want to speak about this wayward brother in any capacity, especially with Omega around. One day, when she was off playing with other children from town, you approached him to talk about it.

“I know you don’t like to discuss what happened with Crosshair, but I thought maybe you could get a little bit of closure if you talked about it to someone that doesn’t already have an opinion formed on the matter.”

Hunter leaned back in his chair and sighed, running one of his hands down his face. While he had never told you specifically to leave the subject alone, only diverting the conversation when Omega brought it up, you had the feeling that he wasn’t keen on talking about it at all. Even with you.

“I get that there is a lot of pain behind what happened,” you continued. “But letting it fester and refusing to talk about it will not make it go away.”

“He made a choice to join a bad group of people,” Hunter said. “We tried to talk him out of it and he refused to listen. That’s all there is to it.”

You raised your eyebrows in disbelief. That didn’t seem like something that would cause the reaction it normally did. There had to be more to it than that, he just wasn’t telling you.

“So you just left him behind? Washed your hands of your own brother and gave up on him?”

Hunter sat up straight, a scowl covering his features at your accusation.

“Of course not!” he said with a raised voice before lowering it to speak again. “We tried to help him. But he’s a stubborn bastard and there is no changing his mind once it’s made up. Believe me, I’ve known him his entire life. Once his decision is made, that’s it. Not even Wrecker could get through to him and those two were closer than any of us.”

Sensing that you had crossed some boundaries, you held up your hands in surrender and backed away from him.

“I’m sorry, I never should have said that. I know you would never do something like that. I was simply trying to get some answers.”

“Why do you care so much?” Hunter asked.

“Because I see the sadness in your eyes everytime Omega brings him up,” you said. “You miss him. I know it.”

Hunter’s expression softened and he looked down at his desk for a moment before pulling open one of the drawers. He lifted something from the drawer and placed it on the desk, pushing it towards you. You picked up the picture frame that he had revealed and looked down at the dusty faded photo within.

It was of a group of five men, all standing together as a united force. Your eyes glanced over the familiar faces of Tech, Wrecker, Hunter, and Echo before landing on a thinner face fixed in an almost permanent looking scowl. He had a tattoo over one eye and a neatly trimmed head of lighter hair than the rest of his brothers. Overall, he had the appearance of someone that didn’t quite look like he belonged. 

“That was taken before we took in Omega,” Hunter said. “And before Crosshair left us. Don’t let his scowl fool you, he was always making that face.”

You could almost hear the love in Hunter’s voice at his comment about his brother’s sour expression. Like it was something that he remembered fondly. 

“I still believe that he might come back someday,” you said, handing the photo back to him. “Sometimes people just need to go through things on their own before they find their way back to where they belong.”

“I hope you’re right,” Hunter said. “Although, it seems like you found where you belong in this town, so maybe you know better than any of us.”

You smiled at him, glad he seemed to have forgiven you for crossing his boundaries before. He returned your smile with a small one of his own before returning the photo back to its original home. Just as you were about to say something else, the door banged open behind you and Omega came running in.

“Hunter! You need to come quick!”

Hunter was on his feet faster than you had ever seen anyone move before, running around the desk to answer his sister’s call. You ran after the pair of them out into the street, but stopped dead in your tracks when you saw why Omega had come to get him.

Tech was on the ground, glasses knocked askew and blood dripping from the corner of his mouth. The local tavern owner, Phee, knelt beside him and was trying to wash away some of the blood with the corner of her apron.

“What happened?” Hunter asked. 

“The Imperials were here,” Tech said as he reached up to straighten his glasses. “They were looking for someone.”

You saw Hunter stiffen at the mention of the Imperials. You didn’t know much about this group, but you knew they were bad news. They had done a lot of harm to people that didn’t deserve it.

“Was he with them?” Hunter asked softly.

“Do you think I would still be here if he was?” Tech asked, getting back to his feet with Phee’s help. “They didn’t seem too interested in us or the townsfolk. They were only looking for someone that was running from them. I think of those religious refugees that came through a few days ago.”

“The Jedi?” you asked. “Why would they be looking for them? You would think they would have given up on them by now.”

Hunter turned to look at you with a pitying look. He knew that your brother had been part of the religious order known as the Jedi, and that his death at the hands of the Imperials had been what had caused you to travel far away with your friend’s family in the first place. It was one of the reasons you had pushed him to talk about his grief so much, you wanted to find a common ground.

“We’ll just keep our distance from any others that come into town,” Hunter said. “If anyone sees something suspicious, just avoid it and go inside.”

“You want us to run and hide?” Echo said, coming up on the scene with Wrecker. “Shouldn’t we do something about it?”

“Yeah!” Wrecker added. “I don’t wanna hide. I wanna fight these bozos off so they leave people alone!”

You heard Hunter sigh tiredly and saw him run one of his hands through his thick hair. You had heard this conversation happen before in their group, namely between Hunter and Echo. The latter wanted to do something about this gang, but Hunter wanted to leave it alone and ignore it.

“Fine, you do what you want,” he said. “But don’t expect a successful outcome. There are more of them than there are of us. I think the best way to deal with it is to avoid aggravating them, but if you feel that fighting back will help, then go ahead.”

Seemingly glad to have their brother’s blessing, albeit reluctant, Echo and Wrecker turned in the direction of the stables. Hunter watched them go, his hands resting on his hips and shoulders drooping low. You stepped forward and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“It will be alright, Hunter,” you said. “They know what they’re doing.”

“I wish I shared your optimism,” he said before walking back in the direction of his office, Omega trailing after him.

The following day, you were making your way back from the well when you came across Hunter sitting on the steps to the station. He was fiddling with a knife, spinning it in his hands as he stared at the ground in front of him.

“Any news?” you asked.

He shook his head and threw the knife down at the ground, watching it embed itself in the dirt.

“They left last night,” he said. “Don’t know where they went exactly. Omega wanted to go with them, determined to help.”

“I take it you told her no?”

Hunter looked up at you with an incredulous expression.

“Of course I did. I had to lock her in her room to prevent her from going after them. She cried herself to sleep, but I think she understands that I was trying to protect her. She and Phee had a long talk this morning and she seemed in better spirits when she came back.”

You shifted the heavy bucket of water to one hip and patted his shoulder, hoping to offer him some sense of calm. He reached up and placed his hand over yours, his calloused fingers rough against your smooth skin. He looked like he wanted to say something, but hesitated a few times, opening his mouth and closing it again before words could come out.

“I should probably get going,” you said, breaking the tension between you. “This bucket is quite heavy.”

He waved you off and you started back in the direction of home. Just before you reached your door, you could hear some strange noises just down the street. It almost sounded like muffled voices. You placed your bucket down and walked in the direction of the sound, keeping your steps light to avoid alerting others of your presence. You came to an alley and peaked you head around the corner.

Huddled in the alley were six men dressed in black with dark bandanas covering the lower half of their faces. A white star shape was emblazoned on their black hats, which you knew meant that they were members of the Imperials. One of the men looked up, brown eyes focusing on you. One of the eyes had a tattoo over it. A tattoo you recognized.

“We have company,” he said in a raspy voice.

You lifted your skirts and ran as fast as you could away from the men, heading back in the direction of the Sheriff’s station. You opened your mouth to call for Hunter, but before you could say anything, a gloved hand covered your mouth.

“Not so fast, little miss,” a voice said in your ear.

Thinking quickly, you stopped your foot down on the man’s toes, causing him to howl in pain and released his hold on you. You started running again and made it to the steps, calling out for Hunter. He came running out and caught you as you stumbled up the stairs.

“Imperials! They’re in the town!” you shouted between gasping breaths.

Hunter told you to get inside and reached just inside the door to grab his pistol and hat from where they were hanging beside the door. Just as soon as he had them in his position, the men in black appeared in the square in front of the station.

“You seem lost, gentlemen,” Hunter said calmly. “I believe you are in the wrong town.”

You peered out from the open doorway, hiding your body behind the solid wooden frame. Your eyes flicked over to the other side of the room, where Tech’s double pistols were hanging. You had never fired a gun before, but maybe you could figure it out if Hunter needed some help.

A tall, thin figure stepped out from the rest of the group and faced Hunter directly. He pulled his bandana down and you could clearly see the face that you had suspected when you had noticed the tattoo before. There was no doubt in your mind. It was Crosshair.

“Don’t play coy, Hunter,” he rasped. “We know the girl is connected to the Jedi. Hand her over and we’ll leave.”

You felt your heart stop in your chest. They were looking for you? While your brother had been in the Jedi order, you had never had any involvement yourself. You couldn’t understand why they would want you.

“You can’t have her, she’s done nothing wrong,” Hunter said.

“Who’s going to stop us? You?” Crosshair sneered. “I know Wrecker and Echo aren’t here to help you and Tech got knocked around yesterday by one of my men. You’re on your own.”

You heard a soft noise behind you and when you turned, you saw a small blonde head poking out from behind the wall that hid the stairs leading to the upper level. You waved your hand frantically at Omega, motioning for her to go back upstairs. She seemed to ignore your instruction, however, and snuck down from her perch on the stairs to stand on the other side of the doorway. 

She grabbed one of Tech’s pistols and tossed it in your direction before taking the other in her own hands. You sighed in resignation and turned the gun over in your hands, trying to figure out how it worked. Omega waved a hand at you and showed you what to do from across the room, motioning to different parts of the gun. You were able to follow her silent instruction and get it ready to fire. 

During this interchange, you had missed everything happening outside. When you looked back at Hunter, you noticed that he had his gun raised, pointing it at his brother. Crosshair had done the same and the two of them seemed to be in a standoff.

“This doesn’t have to be this way, Hunter. No one needs to get hurt, just hand her over.”

A gunshot rang out and one of the men beside Crosshair fell to the ground. Your head snapped over to look at Omega, who had fired the shot. Following her lead, you took out a man on the other side of the group. That left three more beside Crosshair. You quickly reloaded and watched as Omega took out another Imperial quicker than you could imagine. 

Before you could set up to take out one of your own, there was another shot and Hunter collapsed on the ground in front of you. Behind the sound of your own heartbeat, you could hear Omega screaming and two more shots being fired.

You dropped the gun to the floor and sank to your knees beside Hunter. He was still moving, which caused a near sob of relief to escape your lungs. You tore the bottom of your skirt and pressed it against his bleeding shoulder. 

“You need to get out of here,” Hunter said through clenched teeth.

You looked up and saw that Crosshair had disappeared, all of his men lying on the ground. Tech and Phee were running across the square, a smoking pistol in Phee’s hand. She must have taken out the other two men after Hunter had been shot.

“I think we’re good, they’re all dead and Crosshair’s gone,” you said. “We need to get you some help.”

“I’m fine. Give me some whisky and I’ll be good to go,” Hunter said, trying to sit up.

“He shot you, you idiot,” Phee said, coming to kneel beside the two of you. “You’re not fine.”

“I need some pliers, a needle and thread, some bandages, and something to clean his wound,” you said. 

Phee nodded and ran off in the direction of her tavern. You had seen many fights take place there in your short time here in town, so you figured she had some supplies to deal with this kind of situation. 

“You don’t have to take care of me,” Hunter said. “Tech can do it.”

“Tech’s glasses are broken and he’s currently trying to calm down Omega,” you said, looking in the direction of Hunter’s siblings to confirm your statement.

“I still think you should get out of here before he comes back again,” Hunter said, wincing in pain as he tried to move again. “You obviously aren’t safe here.”

“Let me fix you up and then we’ll talk about it,” you said. “You got shot for me, the least I can do is help you afterwards.”

Hunter’s pained expression softened as he met your gaze. 

“I’d get shot for you anyday, beautiful.”

You felt your cheeks warm at his words before the thought that he might be delirious crossed your mind. You shook your head to clear away your feelings just as Phee returned with the supplies.

“Now hold still and let’s get this bullet out of you before you bleed to death.”