#and then Someone I Know also told me that their ideal way of finding a partner would be to go on CHAPERONED!!! DATES!!!

[drtanner]

God. I'm pissed off again and you're all going to hear about it.

Some of you may know that I'm finally in a position to get my top surgery done on the NHS. I've been on their waitlist for a full year and it's finally my turn! But god, they're being asses about my BMI.

Some context: If you're trans, you can get top and bottom surgery on the NHS, but they have some really strict rules about BMI. Most top surgeons and all surgeons who perform bottom surgery require your BMI to be below 30. A few top surgeons will take you if your BMI is below 40, but you'll have to travel to see them and appointments are limited and hard to get. Over 40 BMI and you've got no options. The stated reason for this is that it's supposedly harder to get good results if they have to excise too much fat during the surgery. I'll let you decide how plausible that really is.

My BMI is a little over 40, by about 3.5kg, so not a huge amount. My fat percentage is a bit under 34, so it's not that I'm terribly fat, I just have a lot of muscle and very heavy bones! The surgeon himself - as well as every other medical professional who sees me - was surprised at how heavy I am given my size when he examined me last year and took Before pictures. My upper body is actually very lean and they know this because they've seen me! However, they're still being shits about my BMI, because BMI doesn't discriminate between muscle and fat, or how broad someone is, or how heavy their bones are or anything else, and apparently that's the only metric they go by. I've always had difficulty losing weight, probably because there really isn't that much to lose, so being told that I've now got to find a way to lose at least 3.5kg by October or have my surgery date pushed back isn't ideal and I'm getting really strung out about it. I've spent most of the last 15 years trying to get my BMI down without losing the muscle I worked so hard to build up or cut my leg off with fuck all success. I've been stable at my current weight for most of the last decade but now I have to figure out how to drop down to 121.5kg within three months.

The amount of hoops one has to jump through to get access to any kind of trans healthcare is absolutely ridiculous, a direct result of all the stupid handwringing about "permanent, irreversible surgeries!!!" and so on, as if I can't make choices about my own body.

Only, all of this bullshit about my weight and my BMI reminded me of something else: About ten years ago, when I was also getting shit about my weight (again, despite not being terribly fat, just heavy!), I got referred to a weight clinic. After seeing dieticians and being put on a drastically restricted calorie intake to no avail, I got shuffled off to the weight clinic, where they did the same blood tests that my GP had done before she referred me, saw that they came back normal again, unsurprisingly, and then promptly offered me bariatric surgery.

This was presented as the only treatment they were able to give to help me with my weight loss, to cut out part of my stomach and staple it back together to make it much, much smaller, because they didn't believe me when I told them I was controlling my diet. Like, oh yes, you say you aren't overeating all the time, but just to make sure you can't eat too much, we're going to make your stomach tiny so that you physically cannot fit food into it anymore. I've never heard anything good about bariatric surgery from anyone who had it. Every story is a horror story, from people who can't eat without stomach pain anymore, or keep down anything heavier than soup anymore, or who suffered through all of this only for what little weight they lost to come back in a few years' time. That was the only help they were willing to offer me.

I got up and left, and didn't go back again after that.

So, contrast these two situations. On one hand, I'm grappling with the NHS over my top surgery for entirely stupid reasons because it's ludicrously difficult to access any kind of trans healthcare, but especially surgeries, because they're "permanent and irreversible!!!" and "you might regret it!!!!" or whatever. Meanwhile, they couldn't throw bariatric surgery at me hard enough, just because my BMI was high. Is cutting out a huge piece of my stomach to make it smaller not "permanent or irreversible"? Might I not regret that? Especially when there's no guarantee that it would achieve the desired result at all? I know what I'm likely to get from the top surgery, but somehow that's the one nobody wants me to have.

Anyway, sorry about the long post. It's a fucking dogshit situation and I'm fucking sick of it.

[lilybarthes]

*

[solemntitty]

me when i think I'm cis, like some kind of lunatic: i mean didn't everyone hate puberty to the point of wanting to talk to god a la Karen talking to the manager to be like 'hey motherfucker i didn't ask for this, make it stop'

[anim-ttrpgs]

Help Save the World of TTRPGs and Their Creators.

Okay I’m being a little dramatic, but at the same time I’m pretty serious. This is a call to action, and the livelihoods of myself and lots of other people, many of them (like myself) disabled, are depending on it. This is a post about why, what you can do about it, and (perhaps least often answered) how.

This post is actually an accompaniment to another discussion by someone else. If you don’t want to listen to a 90-minute in-depth discussion of much of what I’m about to tell you, you can just keep reading. Otherwise, click here or here and listen to this either before or after you read this post. (They’re the same thing, just different sources.)

If you have ever made or reblogged posts urging people to switch from Google Chrome to Firefox, you should be willing to at least give a try to other TTRPGs besides D&D5e for much the same principle reasons. I’m not telling you you have to hate D&D5e, and I’m not telling you you have to quit D&D5e, I’m just asking you to try some other games. If you don’t like them, and you really want to go back to D&D5e, then go back to D&D5e. But how can you really know you won’t like other games if you have literally never tried them? This post is a post about why and how to try them. If you’re thinking right now that you don’t want to try them, I urge you to look below to see if any of your reasons for not wanting to try them are covered there. Because the monopoly that WotC’s D&D5e has on TTRPGs as a whole is bad for me as a game designer, and it’s bad for you as a game player. It’s even bad for you if you like D&D5e. A fuller discussion of the why and how this is the case can be found in the links above, but it isn’t fully necessary for understanding this post, it’ll just give you a better perspective on it.

If you’re a D&D5e player, I’m sure at some point or another, you’ve been told “play a different game”, and it must get frustrating without the context of why and how. This post is here to give you the why and how.

[The following paragraph has been edited because the original wording made it sound like we think all weird TTRPGs suck.]

Before that though, one more thing to get out of the way. I'm going to level with you. There’s a lot of weird games out there.

You are gonna see a lot of weird TTRPGs when you take the plunge. Many of them try to completely reinvent what a TTRPG even is, and some fail spectacularly, others really do even up doing something very interesting even if they don't end up being what a core TTRPG player wants. But not every indie RPG is a Bladefish, lots and lots of them are more 'traditional' and will feel very familiar to you, I promise. (And you might even find that you like the weird experimental bladefish type ones, these are usually ideal for one-session plays when your usual group can't play your usual game for any reason.)

You're also going to probably see a lot of very bad games, and man have I got some stories of very bad games, but for now I'm just saying to make sure you read the reviews, or go through curators (several of which will be listed below), before you buy.

Now that that is out of the way, I’m going to go down a list of concerns you may have for why not, and then explain the how.

“I don’t want to learn a whole new set of rules after I already spent so much time learning D&D5e.”

Learning a new set of rules is not going to be as hard as you think. Most other TTRPGs aren’t like that. D&D5e is far on the high end of the scale for TTRPGs being hard and time-consuming to learn and play. If you’ve only played D&D5e, it might trick you into thinking that learning any TTRPG is an overwhelmingly time-consuming task, but this is really mostly a D&D5e problem, not a TTRPG problem as a whole.

“D&D5e has all of these extra online tools to help you play it.”

So what? People have been playing TTRPGs without the help of computers for 50 years. To play a well-designed TTRPG you won’t need a computer. Yes, even if you're bad at math. There are some TTRPGs out there that barely even use math.

“I’m too invested in the narrative and characters of my group’s current ongoing D&D5e campaign to switch to something else.”

There are other games, with better design made by better people for less money, that are the same kind of game as D&D5e, that your current characters, lore, and plot will fit right into and do it better. And no, it's not just Pathfinder, there's others.

“I can’t afford to play another TTRPG.”

You probably can. If you’ve only played D&D5e, you might have been made to think that TTRPGs are a very expensive hobby. They aren’t. D&D5e is actually uniquely expensive, costing more than 3x more than the next most expensive TTRPG I can think of right now. Even on the more expensive end, other TTRPG books will cost you no more than $60, most will cost you less than $20, and a whole lot of them are just free. If you somehow still can’t afford another TTRPG, come to the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book club mentioned below, nominate the game, and if it wins the vote we will straight up buy it for you.

(By the way, if you had any of the above concerns about trying other games besides D&D5e, that really makes it sound like you are in a textbook abusive relationship with D&D5e. This is how abusers control their partners, and how empires control their citizens, by teaching you to think that nothing could ever get any better, and even though they treat you bad, the Other will treat you even worse.)

“If I don’t play D&D5e, which TTRPG should I play?”

That’s a pretty limited question to be asking, because there will be no one TTRPG for everything. And no, D&D5e is not the one TTRPG for everything, Hasbro’s marketing team is just lying to you. (Pathfinder and PbtA are not the one system for everything either!) Do you only play one video game or only watch one movie or only read one book? When you finish watching an action movie like Mad Max, and then you want to watch a horror movie, do you just rewind Mad Max and watch it over again but this time you act scared the whole time? No, you watch a different movie. I’m asking you to give the artistic medium of TTRPGs the same respect you would give movies.

“I want to play something besides D&D5e, but my friends won’t play anything else!”

I have several answers to this.

Try showing them this post.

If that doesn’t work: Make them. Put your foot down. This works especially well if you are the DM. Tell them you won’t run another session of D&D5e until they agree to give what you want to do at least one try instead of always doing only what they want to do. This is, like, playing 101. We learned this in kindergarten. If your friend really wants to play something else, you should give their game a try, or you’re not really being a very good friend.

If that doesn’t work, find another group. This doesn’t even mean that you have to leave your existing group. A good place to start would be the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club which will be mentioned and linked below. You can also go to the subreddit of any game you’re interested in and probably meet people there who have the same problem you do and want to put together a group to play something other than D&D5e. You might get along great with these people, you might not, but you won’t know until you try. Just make sure to have a robust “session zero” so everyone is on the same page. This is a good practice for any group but it is especially important for a group made of players you’ve just met.

“I only watch actual plays.”

Then watch actual plays of games that aren’t D&D5e. These podcasts struggle for the same reasons that indie RPGs struggle, because of the brand recognition and brand loyalty D&D5e has, despite their merit. I don’t watch actual plays, or else I would be able to list more of them. So, anyone who does watch actual plays, please help me out by commenting on this post with some non-D&D5e actual plays you like. And please do me a favor and don’t list actual plays that only play one non-D&D5e system, list ones that go through a variety of systems. The first one I can think of is Tiny Table.

“I can just homebrew away all the problems with D&D5e.”

Even though I want to, I’m not going to try and argue that you can’t actually homebrew away all the problems with D&D5e. Instead, I’m going to ask you why you’re buying two $50 rulebooks just to throw away half the pages. In most other good RPGs, you don’t need to change the rules to make them fun, they’re fun right out the box.

“But homebrewing D&D5e into any kind of game is fun! You can homebrew anything out of D&D5e!”

Firstly, I promise that this is not unique to D&D5e. Secondly, then you would probably have more fun homebrewing a system that gives you a better starting point for reaching your goal. Also, what if I told you that there are entire RPG systems out there that are made just for this? There are RPG systems that were designed for the purpose of being a toolbox and set of materials for you to work with to make exactly the game you want to make. Some examples are GURPS, Savage Worlds, Basic RolePlaying, Caltrop Core, and (as much as I loathe it) PbtA.

“I’m not supporting WotC’s monopoly because I pirate all the D&D5e books.”

Then you’re still not supporting the smaller developers that this monopoly is crushing, either.

Now, here’s the how. Because I promise you, there’s not just one, but probably a dozen other RPGs out there that will scratch your exact itch.

Here’s how to find them. This won’t be a comprehensive list because I’ve already been typing this for like 3 hours already. Those reading this, please go ahead and comment more to help fill out the list.

First, I’m gonna plug one of my own major projects, because it’s my post. The A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club. It’s a discord server that treats playing TTRPGs like a book club, with the goal of introducing members to a wide variety of games other than D&D5e. RPGs are nominated by members, then we hold a vote to decide what to read and play for a short campaign, then we repeat. There is no financial, time, or schedule investment required to join this book club, I promise it is very schedule-friendly, because we assign people to different groups based of schedule compatibility. You don’t have to play each campaign, or any campaign, you can just read along and participate in discussion that way. And if you can’t afford to buy the rulebook we’re going to be reading, we will make sure you get a PDF of it for free. That is how committed we are to getting non-D&D5e RPGs into people’s hands. Here is an invite link.

Next, there are quite a few tumblr blogs you can follow to get recommendations shown to you frequently.

@indierpgnewsletter

@indie-ttrpg-of-the-day

@theresattrpgforthat

@haveyouplayedthisttrpg

@indiepressrevolution

Plenty of podcasts, journalists, and youtubers out there do in-depth discussions of different systems regularly, a couple I can think of off the top of my head are:

Storyteller Conclave (I’m actually going to be interviewed live on this show on April 10th!)

Seth Skorkowsky

Questing Beast

The Gaming Table

Rascal News

Lastly, you can just go looking. Browse r/rpg, drivethrurpg.com, indie press revolution, and itch.io.

Now, if you really want to support me and my team specifically Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy, our debut TTRPG, is going to launch on Kickstarter on April 10th and we need all the help we can get. Set a reminder from the Kickstarter page through this link.

If you’re interested in a more updated and improved version of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy than the free demo you got from our website, there’s plenty of ways to get one!

Subscribe to our Patreon where we frequently roll our new updates for the prerelease version!

Donate to our ko-fi and send us an email with proof that you did, and we’ll email you back with the full Eureka prerelease package with the most updated version at the time of responding! (The email address can be found if you scroll down to the bottom of our website.)

We also have merchanise.

[throwaway-yandere]

𝙙𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙝 𝙝𝙖𝙨 𝙣𝙤 𝙙𝙞𝙜𝙣𝙞𝙩𝙮 (Yandere!Neuvillette/Reader)

a/n: this was inspired by my favorite childhood TV show, House MD & Oedipus Rex. The plot was supposed to be something else but dingleaf happened one 4AM ago. Anyways, welcome to our first Throwaway-Thursday this End of Year Blues!!!

Unreliable Synopsis: Everyone held their breath when they heard ex-defense attorney (Y/n) say these words: "Your Honor, I would like to challenge Champion Duelist Clorinde to clear my charges."

CW: yandere themes, reader has so much spite I can fry an egg, hurt/NO COMFORT. Please prioritize your mental health if these CWs are triggering to you. (Note: The plot happens a month before the Fontaine AQ, so he doesn't know about what happened to Vautrin.)

“Why the pale expression? Has the trial last week caused you tremendous pain?”

"Such pallor is caused by pity, not grief.” Neuvilette made his fragile excuse to reassure Furina, but the words did not reach her ears. The ringing of raindrops outside was louder, more convincing. Fontaine is vexed with storms near-daily. The sad verdant earth will soon sponge and dry the hydro dragon’s tears as always, but every man hopes they won’t drown first. 

At first, he was convinced what he harbored was pity. For the pessimists, Fontaine is a nation where virtuous pagans paraded themselves as rich and devoted ran amok. Absolute justice is a cartoonish ideal– lack of entertainment is the death sentence. 

Lady Furina was starting to believe he lives his life by a certain suspect’s final envoi: 

Count no man happy till he dies, free of pain at last.

"Are you insane?!" Navia held your shoulders, eyes wide. 

This was the worst thing you could ever do to your best friend. 

"Maybe I am." You told her, chuckling slightly as your thumbs caressed the nerves behind her palms. Navia, as intimidating as her occupation was, never once gripped you this hard. 

You wish you could hug her fully.

But these prison bars are holding you back.

"Can you blame me, Nav?"

"Don't." She glared. "Don't do this."

Navia trembled.

"Please, don't follow Dad..."

The blonde woman was reduced to a young, hopeless girl. You saw a reflection of the small Navia who lost Callas, and that short glimpse was stretched into a whole tragic spectacle. 

"I'm begging you, (Y/n). Please… d-don't go away. Don't leave me too…"

This was the cruelest you've ever been to someone you love.

But also the kindest you've been to yourself.

"There's nothing else I can do, Nav."

"W-We can always do something! There must be a way!" She screamed gutturally. "We'll find a way to make that Chief Justice pay instead. If there's a will—"

"But there's none. There is no will in me left."

"Then hold on to mine, for Archon's sake! Depend on me!"

"What for? We both lack the means to grasp our Archon's hand." You shook your head, grinning without life. 

You wiped the tears off her cheeks. In a small fraction of time, you trembled, showing a bit of soul.

"Our Goddess has abandoned me. Everyone and everything but you had." You said. "Dear Navia, don't make this harder for yourself. Let me go."

"(Y/n)..."

Her grip relaxed.

Navia finally let go.

But that was not the scene's last word.

Clorinde sprinted towards your cell, seething in electric rage. Navia stepped back. Their relationship might be less than cordial, but Clorinde was also your friend.

And after all these years of friendship, she never would've guessed you would elicit such melancholic frustration within her.

She knows she'll come out of this duel victorious.

She knows if she doesn't say a word, she'll be the one to bury you six feet under.

Clorinde's fists clenched and her breathing grew harsh and difficult, unable to accept your inhumane gaze.

"Is this your solution, (Y/n)?"

From the tone of her voice, this would not be a pleasant conversation. One wrong word, and you'll see a side of the Champion Duelist not even her court opponents knew.

You nodded.

"Yes."

"State your reason."

"Because this is the only way I'll die with dignity."

…

"Die… with dignity?"

Something inside her cracked.

"Yes." You nodded again, becoming uncertain. "At least with this, there would be something Neuvillette cannot decide for me. And (Y/n) (L/n) chooses a dignified death."

“DEATH HAS NO DIGNITY!!!” 

You and Navia flinched at the sudden sound.

Clorinde screamed, feeling her eyes burn. Her veins became more prominent in her face and her skin reddish. The sheer force of her scream was enough to bring your full attention to her, yet to the duelist, her uncharacteristic outburst meant nothing.

“DEATH WILL ALWAYS BE UGLY!!! DEATH– DEATH IS NEVER BEAUTIFUL!!! IT IS ALWAYS SINISTER— LOATHSOME AND VILE.”

"Clor—"

She pulled you by your collar.

“There– there is only dignity in living.” She trembled, casting her gaze down. “You can live with dignity– but you can’t die with it.”

For a while, only her unsteady breathing could be heard.

Clorinde eventually calmed down, her heavy sighs and frantic pants slowing as the red hue of her face somewhat returned to its usual pale complexion. She couldn’t afford a second more to process her growing grief.

"Find another duelist."

As a successor to the Marechaussee Hunters, there's no one else you need but her.

"But I want you."

"(Y/n)."

"You've always been my idol, Clorinde." You told her solemnly. "I always thought you at least made my clients have a clean death under your blade."

Clorinde paused.

That, she cannot deny. 

She did spare mercy to the people you defended. But she doesn't understand how you fail to comprehend why she couldn't bear to bring herself to enact the same reprieve for you.

"Retrieve your gloves. I don't and I won't accept your challenge." Clorinde closed her eyes. "Live your days in the Fortress instead. Death is not the solution."

You laughed. As if you'd let yourself be under Wriothesley's guidance when you can smell from miles away that he's one of Neuvillette's lap dogs.

"Isn't this suffering enough?" You spoke with a casual lack of self-preservation. "I don't want to live under Neuvillette's scrutinizing eyes. Not anymore."

You looked up.

That empty smile was no longer on your face.

And that was somehow more frightening than it should be.

"So do your job as a champion and end it all, just like what you've done to Uncle Callas and the others."

Your last conversation with the Duke was not as memorable as when he caught you spiking the Iudex’s cup, yet you’d give his personality credit where it is due. His was certainly a memorable one.

Wriothesley stood a few steps away from the bars while you purposefully cornered yourself. The distance was noticeable. It was clear that neither of you was close to each other. This was mere formality brought about by one of your should’ve-been victims.

“So, you sure don’t want to be roommates?” Wriothesley asked. "Or you know, see old friends and family down there?"

"I'd rather not disappoint them with my presence."

“So, you're a coward?" He asked, intending to provoke you.

"Maybe?" you answered, mimicking his tone. "Wouldn't know. Last time I checked, I was an honorable defense attorney. But suddenly, the Iudex had a change of heart."

"Neuvillette didn't have a change of heart. You are a terrorist."

You laughed sardonically, "suppose so."

You both weren't entirely wrong. Friends and foe alike know you've turned to rebellion after the justice system had failed you repeatedly. Neuvillette's lovestruck fixation was merely the final straw.

“You’re walking on a death sentence.”

“No shit,” you clicked your tongue and continued. “What else do you think this is for?”

“The Iudex was convinced that you’re acting out because you had a guilty conscience, and he’s very willing to drop those charges and forgive you.”

“Guilty conscience?! HA!!!” You laughed. “As if I felt guilty for what I’ve done. If anything, I’m rejoicing.”

Wriothesley smirked, but it faded quickly.

“I told him the same, but then he says if that were true, you’re probably just masking it to play the villain’s part.”

“Do you believe every word he says?”

“No,” Wriothesley did not hesitate to answer. “I know a criminal when I see one. And I also know when a criminal can get away with their mess.”

“The jury thinks otherwise– the oratrice cannot be wrong.” You snickered. “I’m as guilty as they come, hands filled with arsenic and all.”

"You can still get out of this. Sure, you'll get a stern talking-to— a lecture on the virtue of honor and respect. But in the end, he'd give you a second chance. He's still hoping that a mutual agreement will arise in the end."

You expressed your disinterest with a droopy-eyed “Blah, blah, blah…”

Wriothesley frowned.

“You’ll make him depressed.”

You raised an eyebrow. 

“And you think I care? Fontaine can flood next month. Just as long as I die tomorrow it’s none of my business.”

…

“Well, it’s your call,” Wriothesley said. “If you’re willing to throw your life away like that, then you probably wouldn’t survive a week underwater.”

He wrapped a hand around one of the bars.

“You know, (Y/n),” the Duke looked at you dead in the eye. “Marriage with the Iudex isn’t as bad as you’re making it out to be.”

You laughed.

“What makes you say that?” You smiled through gritted teeth. “Are you his second spouse?”

“I’m just saying,” he shrugged. “You could’ve just lived a bit more silently.”

You glared. 

“Are you saying I should live like a caged bird? That I should accept that our system here is rigged?”

“I’m saying you should’ve been more grateful with what you have.”

You scoffed.

“Wow.”

An awkward silence followed after. It wasn’t as if a quip was hard to form– but the historical context behind whom you were speaking to made weighing empathy over spite a challenge. You knew of his past, his name or lack thereof, and quiet allegiance to Neuvillette. Sigewinne had made sure you knew of it to glorify the adoptive “father” of the Melusines. Wriothesley owes him his survival.

But "Wriothesley" of all people should've known that those who know morbid truths cannot be silenced forever. 

And Neuvillette owes you a peaceful death. 

… The Duke sighed, noticing that his admiration for the Iudex did not align with his current morals.

“We’ll forever agree to disagree on this, won’t we?” He asked.

“Hopefully not forever, I don’t want to stay here for much longer.”

Wriothesley chuckled at your morbid joke. But before he could walk away with a less-than-heavy heart, you shifted from your corner.

“Hey, Wriothesley?”

He turned to look at you– your hand specifically.

It’s a letter.

“Mind handing these to the authorities?”

Wriothesley’s eyes widened.

“Is that–”

“It’s a written confession,” you chuckled. “Don’t ask me how I got a pen and paper. I know that damn bastard forbids anyone to lend me anything that’ll help me write a final will. Gotta say, at least his etiquette lessons had some use. At least my last words are in pretty cursive.”

He didn’t say another word. 

…

The Duke left the room, empty-handed.

…

No one wants to see the Iudex more heartbroken than he already is now.

The interrogation room was small, but not to the point that there was a minimal budget for its construction. You sat on one end behind the glass divider after one of the guards took your letter. There were only plain walls and two lightbulbs on the ceiling. At the center of the room is a table with two chairs on either side, no pen or paper. 

Nothing but an empty table. 

But the quiet comfort was gone when the man of the hour closed the door behind him. As the ticking of the clock becomes more softer, the two individuals would be forced to sit for the duration of this “interrogation.”

It was none other than your husband, the Iudex, the Chief Justice of Fontaine, and the bane of your existence.

Monsieur Neuvillette.

His back was straight; his eyes, “stern” and focused. He clasped his hands together, fingers intertwined. His gaze searched for something— regret, remorse, anything that could make the upcoming nightmare disappear. 

Neuvillette's voice was “calm” and “collected.” 

But you didn’t buy it. Not with his messy hair, his forlorn look, his frown. You rarely saw him cry. You had a gut feeling he hides it by standing amidst heavy rain, but this time the redness of his eyes and puffiness of his cheeks says it all.

It’s a heavy downpour outside. 

He can’t be bothered to hide his tears from the public eye anymore.

"In your own words, please explain why you had attempted to poison me."

Your eyes lit up. He immediately wished he could take those words back. 

So, he’s still in denial. Neuvillette seriously didn’t think you wrote the letter. He probably didn’t think it was your handwriting. It was almost insulting.

“Oh, Monsieur! You are as generous as they say, finally letting your spouse speak for themselves!” You grinned sarcastically. “And they say chivalry is dead! DEAD!!!”

He cringed at your pointed enthusiasm.

You recount the day you attempted to murder him, describing how you had slipped the poison into his favorite cup. How you didn’t really care to hope it wouldn’t be noticed since what mattered more to you was his death over your own freedom. The more detailed you became, the more it suffocated him.

“But, as you can see, you’re alive and I am behind this glass window,” you tapped the divider. “Away from you, at last.”

He bit his lip.

“(Y/n)—”

“I hate you.”

He breathed in shakily.

“I know.”

“And yet you still fell for it.” Your voice suddenly softened. 

“Why?” You continued. “Why did you believe my act for the past month? I know you had your suspicions, so why? You knew I was just playing along to get your guard down– to act like some loving housewife so I can find the opportunity to smother you with a pillow– so… why?”

“Maybe…”

Neuvillette took a deep breath.

“Maybe it’s because dying by your hands would be a dignified way to go.”

Your eyes widened. The air turned to glue. Breathing became a challenge.

He looked up, meeting your gaze. Monsieur Neuvillette was serious. No shifting position can make you feel comfortable. 

Because Neuvillette in his most sincere form of speech is the most brutal.

“I just wished to be loved by y-you,” his voice cracked. “Even for a moment, even for a lie, I would die to know I was loved by you.”

His face crumpled, tears flowing freely. He reached a hand out against the glass window, his palm marking the divider. Neuvillette was breathing erratically, desperate to hold you. The pain in his chest was getting heavier, much like the rain outside. You almost couldn’t hear him from all the background noise, and you wished that was what happened. 

This was the man who took your clients' happiness. The man who took Uncle Callas away with his rationale. The reason for your unhappiness.

And yet, you couldn't think of any other person who would love you as much as he does. 

“Y-You know me for who I-I am,” he gasped out. “I am but a weak and beaten down man w-who couldn’t express himself like a human being. Y-You were there, you comforted me with not a smile, an umbrella, or thoughtless words of encouragement— you accepted me for who I was with a warm embrace.” 

You hated it. 

You hate how your heart ached for the man that made your life a living hell.

“I was the leader of the Revolution and I needed intel against you, nothing more.” You spat. This time, you were the least convincing one. “It was an act of kindness I shouldn’t have done.”

“Yet it has helped me more than you had accounted for.”

“And never before have I ever regretted playing savior.”

“I was merely attempting to reform your life,” Neuvillette breathlessly spoke. “I wished to set you on the right path. You were a gifted individual with great connections. Your peers had high expectations of you. For you to throw that away for nonsense activism— no— terrorism is heartbreaking. And I—”

Neuvillette gulped.

“I didn’t want to face you on the other side of the courtroom.”

You laughed.

“Some things are just fated to happen,” you said. “An old astrologist told me that. She told me I was bound to get myself in deep legal trouble. Growing up, I figured it might as well be a cause worth doing if it’ll lead me to that path eventually. Why else did I become a defense attorney in such a hellishly political land?”

He trembled, tears falling at a faster rate.

You almost wanted to reach out and wipe those tears away.

Almost.

“Must you treat your life as though it is disposable?” Neuvillette asked, choking slightly. “Why are you…”

You digressed. “You’re not going to retract those charges are you?”

“I did.”

You frowned.

“But Lady Furina would not allow it,” he shook, frustrated. “She found out about your past, your hatred for her so-called incompetences and published lese-majestes.”

“Good for her, good for her.”

Neuvillette’s hand slowly slid down.

“I can’t… I cannot watch this…”

You felt a surge of confidence, for Neuvillette was indeed devoid of hope. You've never seen him with his head hung low. What went through Neuvillette's mind remained uncertain. Perhaps, just a small piece of him knew you could never be his. Perhaps he knew that you were destined for a doomed fate.

But it doesn't matter. 

All that mattered was that you were free.

That was a month ago.

The rain had been going on nonstop for thirty days, and the Hydro Archon had every right to worry. 

“I can’t sleep…” Neuvillette thought he spoke out loud, but it was just a whisper. He’s growing weak, his sleep deprivation catching up to him.

“Then come lay your head down,” she yawned slightly, fanning her breath. “Such heavy thoughts need a place to rest.”

“An irresistible offer,” Neuvillette mused humorlessly. “But I must decline.”

“Oh Neuvillette, when will you relax from this role you carry?” The archon spoke rhetorically.

Neuvillette chuckled sadly.

The heavy downpour wouldn’t stop. 

Perhaps…

Perhaps when the day comes and he is stripped of dignity.

Maybe then, he’ll have his rest.

Neuvillette had already forgotten why he was crying that fateful day. But in those memories, he recalls he was callow and unformed. Was it due to an unfavorable trial? The problem evades him. His recollection remains only in how the people reacted around him. Many asked if he was okay and he'd reply with a simple "I'm fine". And he was, until he could no longer convince himself with that lie. He was certain he was about to dip his toes in another cycle of nihilism.

And then you came.

“Monsieur Neuvillette?”

The rain was pouring out in the cemetery. You were there; your presence questionable. He knew that you arrived intending to probe whether or not he was a sovereign dragon, but he gave you the nod of acknowledgment.

“Greetings, Mx. (Y/n),” he answered, “I trust you’ve been well? Is there a person whom you’re visiting?”

He asked in sheer politeness despite knowing your motivations.

“...”

You frowned.

“How long?”

“Pardon?”

“How long have you been carrying that loneliness, Monsieur?” You asked, voice louder. “How long?”

His lip quivered.

“Centuries, perhaps,” the Iudex thought he could pass it off as a light joke to catch you off-guard, but it came off as too sincere. “I do not keep track.”

You cautiously and awkwardly approached Neuvillette, and without a word, wrapped your arms around him in a comforting embrace.

Just like what Uncle Callas had done for you before.

Your existence here was anathema and your words were seditious. His initial reaction was to resist because he knew you were just like Vautrin. He knew you were secretly seeking vengeance because the oratrice unfavorably judged numerous friends and family.

But he needed it. He needed this badly.

It was then that the Iudex decided that he needed you. That he will keep you.

Neuvillette cannot handle another Vautrin— he can't handle another Carole. So, he'll do it right this time. He'll keep you safe, from your illegal associations and even from yourself. 

And it was a selfish yet necessary need.

A lump formed in his throat as a tear fell, trickling down his cheek slowly. He allowed himself to melt in your hug, trembling. 

“You’re going to need all the hugs you can get if you’re planning to stay as Iudex for centuries more,” you whispered. “You’re resilient, but in this world, that solitary resilience won’t be enough, won’t it?”

Unable to maintain his stoic facade any longer, Neuvillette gripped you tighter in that embrace, his vulnerability finally resurfacing physically rather than Fontaine's rains. Surprised by his sudden tirade of sobs, you embraced him with all the warmth you could muster. At that moment, you had an epiphany. Despite the enmity of their positions, they were the same. Both of you were victims of a nation that demanded more in your assigned roles than you could bear.

“If you'd let me, I'll be the person you’d come to if you ever need a hug.” You weren’t sure if you said it as a devious plan or an act of empathy. “I wouldn’t mind. Not at all.”

You've made yourself important to him now. 

Neuvillette cannot lose you too.

As he clung to the solace you inadvertently provided, you can't help but wish you never extended that small comfort months later. Every inch given could be exploited, and when you offered him a shred of empathy, he had seized it and turned it into a mile-long advantage. The vulnerability shared in that hug was the dangerous crack in the sword you've worked so hard to maintain.

And so, when the time came you faced Champion Duelist Clorinde with it, the gaps broke the sword completely and with its death came soon the end of your life.

She was right. There is no dignity in dying with a broken hilt.

But there was peace.

And as much as you hated Neuvillette, you wish he’d have it too.

"I've made it this far, and all I've ever done was in accordance with what fate and others wanted of me. In my demise, let me do something for myself." “After all, I’ve learned from watching Uncle Callas when he fought Champion Duelist Clorinde— an encounter I’ll surely experience in the next few days— that there is beauty in the end. In his last moments, my much younger self saw what expression he wore.” “He was content. The most content I had ever seen in someone's face.” “It was then that I had an epiphany. One that I hope my “husband” Neuvillette will remember, and I care not if it will bring him comfort or pain.” “What I learned was simple:” “Count no man happy till he dies, free of pain at last.”

Taglist (lmk if you want to be added on the other three fics!): @ayadikreino @kireeen, @pebblemacaroon, @thelostpanta, @vennnnn-diagram, @sagekun, @vadelma-yatta, @detectivei @sugarplumcutiepie @sunhareskies @dxprived4-starboys @unloadingdata @harmonysanreads (amen.) @atomicsoulhumanspy @sangoqueenkoko @pix-stuff @dilucragnidvr 

[silverynight]

Dynamight's type

Izuku has noticed that whenever someone asks Katsuki's certain questions during interviews he gets really irritated; it's usually things about love and relationships that bother him the most.

It's one of the many reasons why Izuku hasn't told his best friend he likes him romantically; maybe Katsuki is not interested in romance at all or he just hates sharing his love life with the world.

Although it's not like Izuku ever thought he had a chance; he probably doesn't. Sometimes he thinks about looking for someone to start a relationship with.

"Let's move in together," Katsuki tells him for the... actually, Izuku has lost count of how many times he has told him that.

But Izuku always thinks he doesn't mean it because it doesn't make sense.

"Why?"

"Just because..." Katsuki says this time, looking particularly frustrated.

"We don't have the need to," Izuku points out, getting a little bit confused by his friend's response.

"I know."

"Kacchan... what if one of us starts dating soon? Wouldn't that be–"

The look Katsuki throws at him is enough to make Izuku shut up immediately; the other pro hero not only looks angry, he also seems hurt.

"Are you seeing someone?" The way Katsuki asks the question makes it look like each word is hurting him somehow.

"No, but–"

"I'm not going to start dating an extra!" Katsuki growls and, as usual, he walks away more irritated than when the day started.

Izuku honestly doesn't get it.

However, he usually goes back to normal when his patrol begins.

Until a reporter finds him after an incident; just right the moment after Katsuki and Izuku manage to save a group of people from a villain.

Actually, there are a couple of reporters, one of them even tries to corner Izuku and instead of asking him about the villain or the civilians, she asks Izuku about romance.

Alright, Izuku has started to get why Katsuki gets irritated at those type of questions.

"Are you dating someone at the moment, Deku?" The young woman asks, smiling at him and using one of her fingers to play with her own hair.

Izuku doesn't understand; is she nervous?

"Uhh... no."

"That's great!"

Not that far from him, one of the reporters is asking about Katsuki's type... again.

"So what would your ideal date be, Deku?" The reporter manages to draw Izuku's attention away from his friend.

"Maybe an amusement park? Sharing a crepe?" The green haired hero doesn't mean to make it sound like a question, but interviews always make him feel flustered.

"That'd be a perfect date for me too!" The girl says. "Would you like to–"

"DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW MY FUCKING TYPE?" Katsuki's loud voice cuts off the reporter who's interviewing Izuku.

"Of course, Dynamight!" It's a good thing most of the reporters are used to Katsuki's explosive personality already.

Instead of answering right away, Katsuki gets closer to Izuku and to everyone's surprise, grabs the other pro hero's freckled face and kisses him on the lips.

"There. That's my type!" Katsuki growls as Izuku's face turns completely pink. "Him. Only this nerd. Now, fuck off!"

The female reporter who was asking Izuku questions looks particularly upset about what happened, although it seems like she's a little bit reluctant to go... but she does anyway when she notices Katsuki is glaring at her.

Izuku doesn't get his hopes up, because it's obvious that Katsuki only wanted them to stop asking questions about his love life.

"But Kacchan... they're going to think we are–"

"Move in with me."

"Why?"

It feels like this is not the moment to have the same conversation all over again, but there's something different in Katsuki's eyes this time; he looks determined.

"Because I'm in love with you, oblivious nerd!"

Izuku's face is on fire, he's sure of it; Katsuki just told him he loved him. It almost seems like it's a dream.

"Are you sure, Kacchan?" His voice doesn't sound shaky at all, which is something Izuku feels ridiculously proud of.

"Of course I am! Wouldn't be asking you if I wasn't!"

After a heartbeat in which Izuku thinks about all the time they've been together and tells himself this is going to work, he nods.

"Let's move in together, Kacchan."

Just a year later, Katsuki proposes to him and of course, Izuku can't help but tear up. He's never been so happy before.

***

Patreon

[gloomunson]

Purely Transactional

First time really publishing anything I've written for Eddie. No stranger to smut. just to him. Go easy on me.

Eddie Munson smut. The one where you fake date. Picture the 90s. Slow build.

Word Count: 12,872

Picture this; you’re being forced to attend your sisters engagement party, it’s a weekend event a couple towns over. You’ve got a room booked for two, yourself and your boyfriend. Your family can’t wait to meet the man who’s stolen your heart at last. It’s actually the second biggest event in your family history for years. The issue: you don’t have a boyfriend. You haven’t had one since you were 16. You only said you did have a boyfriend because you thought you would have by now. You never saw life going this way at all. Now you either have to fess up to being a single mother of two beautiful little dogs or find a last minute lover to feel less alone. Yay.

You asked everyone you knew. The neighbour, the neighbour’s neighbour. His cousin from out of town, his cousin from out of town’s neighbour. Every single one of your friends and only one of them gave you something or more, someone to work with. “Why don’t you ask Eddie?” You’re slouching on his sofa, sinking into the leather as he strums away at his guitar a joint hanging dangerously from his mouth. “I don’t know him.” You say it like it’s obvious, kicking your feet up. “Which is exactly why you should.” You catch his drift, but you don’t want to. It wasn’t as ideal as he thought it was. “I’m gonna get asked questions.” You deadpan. “So, make some notecards.” You tug the joint from his mouth, bringing it to your own. “Yes you may have that.” You flick him. “Rude.” You take a drag before slotting it back gently between his lips, returning to your seat.

“He won’t do it.” Gareth doesn’t respond. “I know he won’t, he doesn’t like me.” He huffs. ‘You hadn’t given him a chance to’ is what he says in his mind. “Has he told you that?” He quit playing, giving you more of his attention. He really did want to help. “Not exactly, no.” He leaned over his guitar, placing the joint down in his hand painted ash tray on the coffee table. The one you made for him for Christmas the year before. The one that he loved and guarded with his life. “Ask him.” You shake your head. “Ask him.” He says again, the guitar now being rested carefully against the table alerting you that he meant business. “No. Way.” You continue. He moves over to you; you slot your legs across his lap, and he leans back into his seat comfortably under the weight of them. “I’m gonna ask him.” You think he’s joking. You hoped he was joking. He wasn’t joking.

-

“Edward, we don’t know each other that well so I thought you’d be perfect plus you’re kinda the only other single one left, so it had to be you.” There were no lies told. You were the only ones; it might have been the only thing you actually had in common in your little inner circle of friends. You weren’t close but you also weren’t complete strangers. You were a little more than acquaintances, but not really friends. He was your only shot at this, that much you did know. “I resent that.” You roll your eyes, ‘you would,’ you think. You’re running out of options, he was your last chance, you had a week to prepare, this had to be it. You considered throwing in the towel moments before he arrived at your place. Half an hour late. It should have been enough of a sign not to go through with it but then he did arrive. Meaning that somewhere deep down inside him, he was interested. You could work with interested.

“I’ll pay you.” You can’t imagine anything worse; you were desperate sure, not desperate enough to actually pay him but desperate all the same. He seemed reasonable enough though. He had more money now than he knew what to do with and he was close with Gareth. Gareth was good people; he’d turn your offer down; you were sure of it. “How much?” He perks up, stroking his chin now his attention was caught. “You weren’t actually supposed to want payment.” You panicked, feet shuffling, hands tapping your thighs relentlessly. He was smirking. “Isn’t that how this is supposed to work?” He steps in close, a couple feet between you, not enough. “Want me to act like an escort? You’re gonna have to pay me like one.” If you hadn’t ever had a conversation with him, you might have found that attractive. He was tall, dark, and handsome. His jawline so picturesque you may have thought about kissing it once or twice. You also liked his eyes, even if he was cold and callous beneath them, only out for himself. But he wasn’t that attractive, and he didn’t intimidate you like he thought he did. Much.

“Like you don’t have more money than my entire family combined.” You dig. His rock star era made a hell of a name for himself. This was never going to happen. You don’t know why he even entertained it this far. There wasn’t a single helpful bone in his body, no matter how much you wished there were. “How bad do you need a boyfriend sweetheart?” He shortens the space between you even more. Your chest feels tight, the confidence dripping from his tongue was actually working on you, you were out of your depth. The way he looked at you too. Eyes flicking down to your lips and back, head tilting slightly, almost robotically, like he was sizing you up. Seeing if he could make it work. Make you work for him. You felt a heat on the back of your neck. You felt gross.

“100 bucks if they believe it, 50 if they don’t.” You couldn’t believe you were even saying it. You’d have to make him forget you agreed to any of that. “For how long?” He quipped back. “You’re so greedy. I’m gonna have to make a note of that in our very public lovers spat.” You lace it with venom as well as humour, standing your ground. The corner of his lips begins to curl. He fights it. “How long?” He repeats again, just as steady in tone. “A weekend.” You breathe. “Like Saturday and Sunday.” He asks. “Like Friday to Monday,” you respond just as deadpan. “200.” He takes a dangerous step closer. You don’t flinch. “150 and no black eye.” His brows furrow, forehead creasing in confusion. He kind of reminded you of a neanderthal. Dumb little boy.

“Why would I have a black eye?” You raise your fist. “OKAY PUT YOUR FIST DOWN. Jesus woman, I’ll do it.” He admits defeat. “Perfect. I made some note cards, things about me you may get asked about, read them, memorise them, guard them with your life.” You tug the notes from your back pocket, pushing them into his chest abruptly. He looks down at them quizzically. “What if they ask about me?” You shrug your shoulders. “I’m sure you’re not that complex.” He doesn’t attempt to hide how insulted he is by that.

“When is it?” You point to the cards. “All the information you need is in the notes.” He opens his mouth, closes it, then opens it again, “how are we-“ you go to open your front door, you’d had the entire conversation in the hallway, not wanting him to go any further into your home than that. “In the notes Edward.” He takes a look down at the cards in his hands, he hated reading other people’s handwriting, made him feel dumb when he couldn’t understand it as well as he’d liked. You joined your letters all curly too which didn’t help. He actually half expected you to dot the I’s with hearts, you seemed like that kind of girl. He wasn’t sure if he was disappointed that you hadn’t.

You’re ushering him out the door, waving your hand to make him move faster. He pauses in your doorframe. You were so close. You could just kick him; he’d be off your property in no time. You wouldn’t have to think about him for another week then. You could pack your bags in peace. “You spelt my name wrong.” He points to the card; you’d done it on purpose. “No, I think your parents did.” He frowns. Before he can respond again you give him that much needed shove out the door. “BYE Eddie!” You slam it behind him, leaning your back against it as if that would prevent him from getting back inside and on top of your nerves again. He found the whole ordeal just as unpleasant as you had but he still finds himself on the other side of that door with a smile on his face. He read every single card you wrote for him. You were way more annoying than he thought. 

-

“What part are you guys having trouble understanding?” You ask the table, leaning over, reaching for your cocktail to distract your mouth before you can step your foot in it. You were being tested way harder than you ever anticipated you would. You really never imagined they’d care let alone put you on trial for the crime of getting a boyfriend without their prior knowledge or approval. It’s nice to know how friendly and welcoming they really are when push comes to shove. You’d have to keep that in mind for the real thing, whenever that might be.

You’d laugh the nerves away, but you were afraid you might never stop laughing. You’d just manically laugh until you sank under the table, down into the ground, right to centre of the earth, burning up at the core before passing away painfully. You wished you could laugh. Instead, you just took the longest sip, looking to your left and right as subtly as you could muster under the immense pressure placed upon your shoulders by your sister and her fiancé. Deep breaths, it’ll all be over soon. 

“I don’t buy it.” She states matter of factly. “You go from a single dog mom to suddenly in love with the perfect guy.” You open your mouth to speak but you daren't even try, she’s not finished yet. “It’s a little conveniently timed don’t you think?” She waves her hands to illustrate her point in that annoying fashion that only she could. Waving her fresh manicure right in your face, whether accidental or on purpose, still ridiculously annoying and yet another reminder that she had her life together and you didn’t. She turned to her fiancé before glancing towards the rest of the table for back up, all nodding along with her instantly as if she were a puppet master stringing them along. Cowards. 

Your gaze remains steady and ice cold, colder than the slushy cocktail in your hands. The only thing that made the weekend worth it was the free bar and the adorable outdoor beer garden. You release the straw after a long sip with an “Ahh.” You try not to enjoy the twitch of your sister’s right eye at the sound. She’d always loathed when people did that. Anyone who made a noise of satisfaction after a drink no matter how delicious or refreshing it may be, was a colossal pain in her ass. You think she just despises other people’s enjoyment. She thinks it’s an unnecessary sound that people tend to use to exaggerate how nice something is as a performance for other people rather than for themselves. She also thinks it’s incredibly unladylike, which gives you a bigger kick to try it out every single time.

“Why would I lie?” You place your drink down harder than you intend to, wincing as the glass clangs on the table so hard you thought it may shatter. “You know I love you sis, but I don’t think I’d go to the length of faking a relationship just because you’re getting engaged.” Which would be such a wonderful sentence to throw out into the universe if that weren’t exactly what you were doing. “I just met the right guy.” You try not to grimace at the cheesiness of it all, that, and the fact you still hadn’t decided if you’d even liked him more than just a piece of eye candy. Because there was no denying that he was attractive, from the start he’d had that going at least. You’d only been admitting it because of the influence of alcohol too. It was just the rest of the package that gave you a headache.

“But he’s-“ You scowl before she continues that sentence, you almost will her to continue. “He’s what?” You push. If anyone were going to come for Eddie they had better make it good because that was an area you excelled in and would absolutely love to be a part of even if you did have to defend him right now. You could always use any good material at a later date when left to your own devices though, a pen and paper would be wonderful.

“He’s not your type.” You don’t believe that’s what she planned to say, it came out far too polite to be something she’d actually thought of. “What is my type then?” You probably shouldn’t have asked her this, but your curiosity trumps all reason. She flails her hand around in her lap, trying to think of the correct way to phrase it. You had no doubt your past relationships were displaying in her mind, enough horrendous options for her to choose from right out of a hat. 

“Nerds,” she begins to list on her fingers, which is quite alarming because you really didn’t think you had that much of a track record. “Gamer boys,” which basically comes under ‘nerds.’ “Skinny guys,” that was absolutely not exclusive, “Gamer boy nerds.” She throws 3 fingers up. That’s if she was classing ‘boy’ as a type which you assume she was. You had to hand it to her, she wasn’t entirely wrong about your past dating pool, but Eddie wasn’t exactly far off that. Allegedly, back in his school days, he was the biggest nerd of them all, right before his band took off, he was participating in DnD tournaments and if that wasn’t the epitome of gamer boy nerd then what was? He just happened upon a glow up in his mid-twenties, something you still desperately waited for yourself. “Eddie just, doesn’t seem much of a nerd.” You’re certain that’s not what she intended to say, and you thought she might stop herself there, but she doesn’t, why would she? “He’s, well I hate to say it,” you bet she doesn’t though, “he’s out of your league.” Ahh, there it is. That’s more like it. She even says it with an apologetic expression to make you consider it for a millisecond. If only he were here. Oh, how he’d love this.

Eddie was the lucky one in this scenario, whether it was fake or not, you were a catch. One that no one had ever caught and kept hold of but a catch, nonetheless. Your mom would agree, probably not the best argument but it’s there and it counted. You reached for your drink once again and prayed he returned soon; you were drowning out here and you weren’t even out of the shallows. “Then lucky me.” You sip as aggressively as one can with a shitty paper straw wedged between their teeth. You were so glad the sea turtles were safer at the hands of recycled paper straws, but you so missed being able to drink a cocktail without the added ingredient of paper mache sinking at the bottom of each glass.

“Why are we in luck?” His voice swings in joining the conversation as he walks back over to your table, the chain on his jeans jingling as it swayed while he walked. You’d asked him to remove it, he swore he would, he didn’t. His hearing was impeccable, you wonder what else had slipped by him on his way over. You’d honestly never felt so relieved to hear his voice either, even if his steps closer bought the smell of cheap cigarettes and your early twenties. You’d have loved him back then. Back in college, your first taste of freedom, the option to date whoever you liked, to experiment a little. You’d have eaten up that bad boy, leather jacket, fingers coated in metal, cigarette smoking musician act he had going for him. Quiet and brooding too, oh yeah, your knickers would have never left the floor. Good thing you grew up since then. 

He grabbed his chair, pushing it right next to yours, as close as he could get without sitting directly on top of you and for a second you ponder about why he bothered with his chair at all. His eyes burned into the side of your face, and you plastered a smile wide enough to match his as you leant into him. “What took you so long?” You whispered while maintaining that sickeningly sweet smile that hurt your face to pull. “You miss me that much?” He licked across his bottom lip, and you mentally scold yourself for looking at it. “I’m getting eaten alive out here.” He grinned wider. “Must be because you’re so damn delicious.” Your stomach fluttered. What the fuck? 

He pressed a chaste kiss to your cheek. You felt yourself relax into him, like his lips had sucked all of the tension from your body. You may not like him very much but you sure were glad he was here right now. Even without the facade, it was hard being in environments where you had to face your entire family alone. It’s not that you weren’t close with them, or didn’t love them, it was just difficult standing your own ground sometimes. You needed that extra shield for the invasive questions and high expectations, the anchor to keep you firmly in place, sure of yourself. It was a tough act to balance. 

He couldn’t deny that he’d gained some respect for you for how well you’d handled things. He wasn’t entirely sure he’d manage a family dynamic like this alone, even if he were part of it. He was kind of developing a soft spot for you, probably more than you were anyway. Okay, definitely more than you were. He wasn’t sure when it started. He’d had the message exchanges throughout the last week. He had the detailed notes about your life from start to finish to divulge. The 3 hour car journey where you refused to play music, instead forcing him to answer questions about you in preparation for the event. It was somewhere amongst there. Maybe even when you’d shared a room the past two nights without killing each other. In seeing a vulnerable side of you that made you appear a little more human. He’d also seen a larger portion of you without clothing, that certainly helped.

Yes. Perhaps somewhere around there he’d liked you. All he knew now was that in watching your interactions with your family, it made him want to stick to you like glue and support you the best he could for however long you would let him. You had it covered, and you’d tell him that too, afraid of showing any weaknesses, but that’s exactly why he felt like he should support you, he didn’t want you to feel so alone, you didn’t have to be so alone. He’d known all too well what that was like.

He didn’t even have to force himself to kiss your cheek that time, he’d just wanted to rid your face of the frown that threatened to grace it, even if he found it adorable. His issue now was that he had trouble moving away. His lips lingering, breath tickling your cheek, until you coughed under your breath for him to shift away. For a moment he’d wished it weren’t all play pretend. That he could stay there and have it not feel so strange. He couldn’t pin point when his eyes started to soften at the sight of you. All he knew was that they had. It was getting increasingly easier to act enamoured by you, because, well, he might have been.

“So, what did I miss?” He tilts his head towards the rest of the table, it felt like such a difficult task to withdraw his attention from you. You yourself took the opportunity to catch a much needed breath. You also needed to pat your stomach to hold off the swarm of butterflies scrambling around in there. There was this dizzying, uneasiness in the pit of your tummy, like you were fighting the emotions within yourself. Those damn love bugs were wasting their time going crazy for this situation. It wasn’t real, not worth the energy. Surely you didn’t need to be convinced of that, it was clear as day. You didn’t need this unnecessary nausea. “We were just talking about what a wonderful couple you are.” Your brother in law speaks, directing his attention towards the man at your side. You really thought you’d liked that man, he betrayed you. You kept a special scowl just for him. He felt hot under the collar when he felt the intensity of it. Good, you thought. Traitor. 

Eddie bravely dipped his hand down onto your thigh where he’d noticed your hand was already resting, slipping his fingers between yours, resting atop your knuckles effortlessly for all to see. You’d felt your breath hitching in your throat. The simplicity of the action shouldn’t have caused such a stir, but it was just so easy for him. He was so touchy feely like it was the most natural thing in the world. He loved to touch, and you never expected it from him. It was one of the main reasons that made it so hard to remain sure that this was all an act. Was he like this with everyone? You’d half hoped he wasn’t, even if your other half screamed at you for that naivety. It wasn’t exactly your love language, but you’d wished it were, you wanted to touch him. Too many drinks maybe.

“Why do I feel like that’s sarcasm?” He threw back with nothing but charm, sweet like honey dripping from his tongue. If he weren’t in a band you could certainly picture him as an actor with some of the crap he pulled. Sometimes he even had you believing this whole thing, lines blurring like no other. Especially when nuzzled his nose into your neck eliciting a squeal from your lips. All before deciding to stay there, sitting with his chin resting on your shoulder happily. Like the most casual position in the world.

Your heart pounded against your chest. His arm slunk around your waist. His mouth opened for you, signalling you to bring his cocktail and straw between his lips to take a sip. A ridiculously over the top public display of affection you swore you’d never partake in. Yet for some reason your hands were ignoring every judgment your mind was making, allowing you to feed him his drink like some kind of mother to a parched child. It was interesting to you how fast you’d been able to communicate with him like that without it ever needing to be said or asked for. “You owe me.” You whisper. “Not how this transaction really works.” He says between sips rather impressively. It might even be considered cute if it wasn’t such a threat. Your cheeks burned.

“It just seems so sudden.” Your sister just can’t bite back her tongue for more than two seconds huh. You’re literally sat there with giant, red, beaming heart eyes for each other. So, close your personal space would never be described as such for as long as you shall live, ever again. Literally feeding each other. Squeezing each other’s hands. Hating every second you’re apart. Feeling like you may break without the other. Whispering sweet nothings (more like threats but no one else had spotted that) into each other’s ears. You’re both so over the top, overwhelmingly infatuated (although falsely) with each other you may as well claim this engagement party as your own and YET, no one believed you for a second. Hell, even you thought you might be falling. Thank you vodka.

“When you know, you know.” You say, lifting your hand to pat his cheek after putting his drink back on the table. He squeezes your other hand instinctively. He’d almost forgotten he was holding it in the first place, it felt so nice and soft, like it belonged in his. It could belong there. “What will it take to convince you?” He offers. You squeeze his hand even harder, this time hoping to pump the breaks on this one. As much as you appreciated him sticking up for the relationship. You weren’t up for a quick fire round of questions that you weren’t prepared in the slightest. Especially since he refused to learn the answers to any potential enquiries a day prior. Deeming the impromptu quiz session in the car ‘enough learning for a lifetime.’

“Ed,” is all you warn while you beg him to shut up with your mind instead. “No, no sweetie, we can answer all the questions they have.” He grinned at you so menacingly; you wanted to wipe that smirk right off his adorably smug little face. Woah. When did he become adorable? Scratch that. Shush. You’re so pissed you don’t even fawn over the pet name, much. You may as well pack your bags now and return home though, you were done for, the hoax was over. The end.

“What’s her favourite band?” Okay, we’re actually doing this. “Or singer, if that’s easier.” Ryan, your least favourite brother in law and your only brother in law, fires out. He only knew the answer himself because he tried to impress you one Christmas by buying you a limited edition vinyl. Of all the people at this table, you thought at least he wouldn’t be sceptical of you. Unbelievable.

“There isn’t just one, its multiple, depends what mood she’s in.” You’re intrigued already on where this is going. Your sister jeered at the response, already less than impressed. Eddie turns his head, lifting his hand to silence her before she can say anything. You almost pat him on the back for it. “But, if I had to choose.” Which he did. He really did. “Queen, Black Sabbath, and I’m going to add Corroded Coffin in there because she’s our number one groupie, aint that right babe?” You allow yourself to roll your eyes at the last part, even if you were dating you doubt you’d let him describe you as a groupie, dick.

“That’s easy, they’re pretty generic choices.” You had to give them that one, it wasn’t the most cut throat list of indie artists you could only associate with your taste and yours only. You’d been a bit of a basic music lover your whole life and there was no shame in that. You liked what you liked and that was okay. You were still impressed he knew any of your list though. Maybe he actually had read your notes, lying shit. Definitely not adorable. “Favourite food?” Okay, still going. You lean back, may as well get comfortable since you’re going to be here for a while. 

He snorted before answering that one and you wondered what was so insanely funny that could make him move his hand away from your thigh to explain it properly. You missed his touch the second you were without it. Gag. “Bread.” He giggled just saying it, the kind of giggle where the creases beside his eyes really stood out and his cheeks bunched up all precious and pudgy underneath them. You can’t help but smile.

“But not just plain bread right,” he looked to you before continuing as if to say ‘hey, watch this, look at me.’ He thinks he has you down. You indulge him. “So, bread in its many forms,” he lifted his fingers to start listing, “sandwiches, toast, brioche, fried bread, french toast, pizza dough, the list goes on right but at the height of it all,” he really gestured above his head to signify the detailed tier system of bread options. He added a small and useless breather to gain anticipation, it wasn’t working. “Garlic bread.” 

You snorted a laugh yourself this time. Not because he was wrong either, because he was 100% correct in fact. You were mortified that, that was your own answer. He locked eyes with you in a way that he hadn’t done before, with genuine affection, maybe even a glimmer of hope that he’d done you justice. He was captivated by you, your cheeks bursting with redness, your smile tight, starting to hurt you in fighting it. You looked so pretty right now. The glow of the lamps out in this beer garden just added to the radiance he already thought you had. He couldn’t believe a girl as pretty as you considered bread your favourite food.

He also found the noise you made to be one of the cutest things he’d ever heard, and he wished he could make you do it again someday. He really didn’t consider himself that funny though. He might have to get some drinks down you for another laugh like that. “I thought your favourite were sour patch kids?” Your sister argued, using her nails again to assist her point. Eddie quickly chimed in before you could go to correct her.

“Actually, that was her hyper fixation for a little while, ate every flavour except lemon. Which are my favourite, so it works out pretty well.” Your jaw may as well have hit the floor. He’d only known that from the car ride up here. You were about to throw the packet out before he stopped you, complaining you were wasting money and food since you left all the yellow ones. You were shocked he remembered. If you were impressed by him right now, surely everyone else had to be too, right? Wrong.

“Celebrity crush?” He answered this quicker than you or he would like to admit. You also just didn’t  know how he came to the conclusion he did and how he was so correct with it, suspicious. “Harrison Ford hands down, can’t even knock it, he’s a handsome man.” The next question went swimmingly too. “Favourite hobby?” He gave it a thought for a second, glancing to you and back, “painting, she’ll say she’s no good at it but actually she’s got a gift. I’ve never seen anyone use colour the way she does. Actually, considered using some of your work for album art.”  He turned to you towards the end, and you struggled to decipher whether it was bullshit or not. Your heart actually ached at the thought of it being true. 

“Favourite movie?” Your brother in law’s turn to ask. You threw your head back in exasperation. “What is this, the Spanish inquisition? Is this really necessary?” You looked to your sister and her future husband. “Yes!” They admitted in unison. Eddie’s hand returned to your thigh, patting it softly, his thumb rubbing soothing shapes into your bare skin. It was working. God it was working. He was like ice against your fire, the way he cooled you.

“I’ve got this.” He assured you. “Yeah, you kind of do, that’s why it’s so fucking weird.” You admitted quietly but not enough as to hide it from anyone else, deeming it safe for public consumption. He smirked. “Scared I know too much about you?” You were. You were terrified. This time you do lower your voice. “Just didn’t know you could actually read. Guess my notes were a great help after all.” You stuck your tongue out. For a second he thought about taking it in his mouth, probably some other filthier thoughts floated around his brain too. It was something about the proximity and the cocktails you’d shared, you could always blame those.

“Anything Tim Burton but her favourite would have to be the one with Winona,” he knows he has it right, but he just can’t think of the name, turning to you momentarily for help, you mouthed “Edward Scissorhands” before he nodded and repeated it. Considering it featured his own name, you’d think he would remember it. He then paused, not for dramatic effect but so he could smile to himself as he thought about why that was your favourite. “It depicts the whole Frankenstein’s monster thing just finding his way into suburbia but we as the audience” he gestured to his chest, “see a lot more heart than that, an innocent kind of love, one we all want to make us feel worthy, naive really, but ultimately sweet and sacrificing.”

You leant in, your lips close to his ear. “If we were really dating, you’d be getting your dick sucked so hard tonight.” It took every bone in his body not shut the evening down and carry you back to your hotel room with that false promise in mind. He instead tried to ignore the now throbbing sensation in his trousers. Had you always done that to him?

“Ok those are fairly standard.” In what world was his last answer not specifically catered to you? “How about a random trivia round?…” The suggestions just kept going. If this were the only worthy form of entertainment they could find, married life was going to be abysmal. “Or.” He began and this is when you really, really started to panic, like exponentially. There was nothing that could have helped him out now. Your notes only consisted of the likes, dislikes, and the fake scenario in which you first met. There was nothing else. That was the end of the script. He couldn’t be that good at improvisation. You didn’t want the opportunity to find out either. You were no casting director. He no longer had to impress you or anyone else. If they were still at odds with the situation then so be it. You couldn’t please everyone. It really shouldn’t have taken you that long to realise it. Huh. The more you know.

“I can tell you about how she makes me feel.” You really, truly would rather you didn’t know. If it’s the truth, it would hurt. If it was a lie, well that might hurt even more. You begged the universe to keep him quiet. Whatever he had to say was going to blow your cover and throw this whole shit show up in flames. Your sister seemed so keen and intrigued enough to let him continue. You however, said your final goodbyes to any future you had where you weren’t a laughing stock for the entire family. A future where Eddie Munson couldn’t reject and discard you publicly. Now it was a very real possibility, you were far more upset than you ever thought you would be. Eddie glances at you briefly, bucking up the courage to put on the biggest and most detrimental show of his entire life. 

He doesn’t face your sister when the words come tumbling from his mouth. He faced you, addressing you like he needed you to hear this and fuck, maybe he did. You actually felt touched about it until he opened his mouth. “You’re kind of a fucking weirdo.” You went to shut him up as the embarrassment crept in, but he spoke louder as he often did. “You are, you’re a freak- and it’s so, it’s refreshing.” Your mouth closed but oh, so slowly. You began to listen to him, decided to trust him. “You’re fucking nuts.” You rolled your eyes. How many ways were there, to describe you as crazy? Why did he feel the need to use all of them? “But I like it. I do. I feel like I can be myself around you.” He talked with his hands a lot as he scrambled the words, rings clinking against each other. You reached for them, settling them in your lap and he silently thanked you for it. Everything got a whole lot easier when you held his hand. 

“You make it feel okay to be a bit crazy. You don’t have to be so straight or basic, you can just, be.” Just as you started to smile, you saw that you weren’t the only one. It was working, his little speech was actually working. “I like who I am around you. Even if sometimes you don’t. I like that you tell me when I piss you off. I like that you act like you hate me when you don’t. I like that you’re so fucking stubborn and headstrong you’d never rely on anyone else and that pisses me off.” You felt tingling racing across your chest. “I love that no moment with you feels forced. That, that smile, right there could make flowers bloom.” He gestured to your face with both of your hands linked together. “That your glare could cause a fucking storm or something.” You tried not to get swept up in the fact he’d stopped saying ‘like.’ 

“I love that everything feels okay when your hand is in mine, even when you try and say you don’t like holding hands, you’re too good at it to hate it. You know exactly the right moments.” He shook his head with a disbelief. It started to feel so real. “I think I’d miss you even if I’d never met you.” His hand tightened around yours when he said his last sentence. “And I’m glad I met you. I hope one day you’ll be glad you met me too.” The rest of his speech hadn’t mattered when he uttered those words. The words that knocked the breath out of you, leaving you fighting for your life in the seat next to him. You don’t think anyone had ever referred to you so kindly in your life, even if he did call you fucking mental at least 5 times throughout. 

He couldn’t even breathe. He’d said it. He’d let it all out and now he just saw the look of shock on your face and couldn’t take a single breath, not knowing how you’d react. It was news to him too though. He could play it off as a lie, say he saw it in a movie, some chick flick or something. He’d copied it because of course he had. But then again, on the off chance you weren’t horrified, he wasn’t sure if he had any more guts left to tell you it was true. He just knew that he needed to do something. He had to fill this painful silence somehow and thankfully, he didn’t have to do it alone. 

You kissed him. You scraped your jaw off the floor, and you kissed him. You’d not kissed him like this before. Like your life depended on it. Like he was the very air you needed to breathe. Like he’d meant every word he’d just said, and you’d believed it. God you might have even felt the same. You were also slightly ashamed to say, it had your panties soaking between your thighs. Not to mention your heart thundering in your chest.

Eddie kissed you as if he were tattooing his words across your lips for all of eternity. Because for the first time throughout this whole charade, he was actually allowed to mean every word he had said, whether he knew this was how he was feeling at the start of the evening or not. Neither of you could have predicted a confession like this. Even after giving one, he wasn’t quite believing it himself. But fuck, there was freedom in it. There was a lovely form of permanence. Him knowing his words were out there for the universe to take and make with what it will. He felt weightless. It wasn’t the cocktails. Something just clicked in his brain, and he knew it. You were everything.

You melted into each other when his lips found yours. It was sweet and slow but confident, with purpose. Each stroke of his lips against yours carefully considered and carried out like clockwork. You’d felt a rush from this kiss. It was hungrier than any other you’d shared. Quite frankly it was starved. You’d pressed up against him so hard and he’d done just the same to you. His hands coming up to tilt your chin up towards him for more. As if you hadn’t been close enough already. Its only when you gasped at his touch did he slip his tongue into your mouth. You knew he’d had so much practice kissing women like this, but you couldn’t care. You allowed him inside, welcomed the way he licked into your mouth delicately. Blissfully enjoying the taste of his last cigarette on his breath, shocked that it’s not even a put off for you right now.

His words had gotten you drunker than the cocktails you’d been knocking back all evening. You almost whined when he dragged himself away from you. It was way too premature for your liking. Your eyes remained on him and only him as your hands fell back from their place atop his shoulders. You weren’t even sure when they’d gotten there in the first place, just swept away with nothing but him to guide you. 

He smiled at you; a smile you know he hadn’t been pretending. You were about to lean back in, sealing that gap between you, before you were reminded of exactly where you were. In public. Very much in public. You sank back into your seat sheepishly, heat rising to your cheeks, burning hot like lava ready to erupt. Eddie threw his arm around you, and you seized the opportunity to hide your face in the crook of his neck out of embarrassment. He thought it might be the cutest thing you could possibly have done. He even struggled to wipe the blush off his own cheeks. He felt like a school boy again. “Okay, fine, we believe you.” Your sister threw her hands up in defeat. You’d forgotten what you were even aiming to prove, your head was so flooded with hormones. It remained that way until you were back inside the hotel.

-

Back in the safety of your room, deep in the darkness, the only light being from the glowing orange streetlights outside, you found yourself nervous for what would come next. You needed a moment to think. “I’m going to take a shower.” You said softly. “Do you mind?” He shook his head, unable to speak. You’d think that after he’d already lay everything down on the table, that he’d find it easier to approach you, but he resorted back to silence. “Go ahead.” He offered. You wanted to ask him to join you. You didn’t. You just thought about it while you locked the bathroom door behind you. When you wiped off your makeup. When you turned the water on and waited for it to heat up before stripping and stepping inside. You thought about it even under the water, arm stretched out to reach you shampoo. You still didn’t.

He’s already tucked away under the sheets, while you’re in there. He thought about falling asleep, willing himself into a trance before you could return, he couldn’t. His mind was swimming with thoughts. He instead insured that the wall of cushions you’d built on night one, was as high as it ever was. There to wedge a distance between you once more. Which is what you wanted, right? It was your main housekeeping rule for sharing a bed.

“Hey." He breathed, as you returned from the bathroom, steam seeping out after you. He was nervous. You ignored it. He lay flat, facing the ceiling, his arms fastened at his sides above the covers. You shouldn’t let your eyes wander but the light had given you a clear path to follow, leading you to the tattooed arachnid of his chest. You wanted to touch it, you’re not sure why. You slipped silently into bed beside him, only you turned your back on him, willing the conversation to end. But you didn’t actually want it to be over. 

He rolled over without so much as a creak being made on the old bed. He barely even tugged the cover from you. It’s like a move too sudden would spook you and send you running, it might have, he couldn’t be certain. “Do you think the great wall of prevention might be ready to come down?” He nudged it into your back for emphasis. He didn’t want the night to end. You didn’t either. And yet, your stomach twisted to think of an excuse, a reason for it to stay very much where it was. Only you didn’t find one. “Okay.” You spoke softly. “Okay.” He repeats just as low, just making sure. You hardly felt him moving them. It was so unlike him to be so gentle, so light handed, treading carefully. He was so cautious and calculated, you never thought he had it in him. The cushions were gone. Now what?

“I’m gonna ask you something, you don’t have to say yes, but I really need to ask it so please just hear me out.” There were a million different things he could have asked you; you’d never have enough time to predict it or rehearse the correct answer, you could only breathe as you anticipated it. “Can I hold you?” It felt good to say it, even if his breath was shaky and his heart felt like it might just pack in. He really wanted to touch you. That was before he even saw you there, lay in the warm glow of the light, hair still a little damp, loose over your shoulder, your t-shirt clinging to your body.

The sheets weren’t covering your lower half as well as you’d thought they were, not now the barrier between you was down. Now he could see the lace band of your panties peeking bellow your sleep shorts. He was about to abandon the whole ordeal. Just a peek shouldn’t have been enough to stir him between his legs and maybe it wasn’t, not on its own. But if he’d counted every other occasion tonight where you’d looked too pretty, sounded too sweet, it all added up and he guessed it contributed to the problem. 

He started to worry when you didn’t answer him. You obviously weren’t asleep. You were clearly fiddling with the sheets, your fingers tugged at the material anxiously. He’d completely overstepped, he should have expected that. You weren’t together. You wouldn’t ever be together. That was all this entire weekend was supposed to be after all. Just an opportunity to fake it. How could he be so stupid? “Come here.” He looks down to see you half turned back to him, the duvet lifted, giving him even more of a view of your shorts, but he tried not to look at you too much. To just see the invitation, which was what mattered the most. 

He wasn’t sure how to approach, you couldn’t help him either. You would spoon, that was a given, you hadn’t budged your position, left him no choice but to mould his body around yours. He shuffled closer, awkwardly trying to stretch his right arm underneath your pillow without lifting your head, hurting your neck. He curled around your back, leaving inches between you, like he couldn’t quite make himself grow any closer. His left arm rested on his own hip, too afraid to reach out and touch yours. He’d asked to hold you. Why can’t he hold you? 

You took matters into your own hands. You blindly reached behind you, hands finding his. Your one superpower. You interlock your fingers with his and bring his arm around your waist, the heat of his body coming with it. You could probably feel his heart pounding chest now he allowed it to press against your back. You definitely felt the goosebumps climbing his arms when you pressed a feather light kiss to his knuckle. His heart leapt in his chest.

“What was that for?” He lifted his head, you don’t know it, but he can see enough of your face from this angle to catch the blush on your cheeks and the smile that crept onto it. He’s reassured by it. “Just felt like it.” You shrugged. Only he doesn’t buy it, but he won’t push his luck. His head hit the pillow, only this time, he’s closer to you. His nose is nearly buried in your apple scented locks. You were so sweet smelling at all times, but that apple was just so incredibly you. He knew you’d only used the stuff because it came in a green bottle too. Because only you would map your product selection on the colour alone. It was one of the first facts in your note cards, that your favourite colour was green.

Fuck. He thinks. He really fucking liked you. He wouldn’t even curse himself for it. You weren’t what he expected, and he liked that. He liked that this didn’t go to plan. He liked that he couldn’t pretend any longer. He was grinning to himself, chuckling even. He boldly buried his head in the crook of your neck like he’d done a couple of times that night but more invasively now there wasn’t much space between you. 

“What’s so funny?” You shook his hand in yours. “Hmm?” You fought a laugh yourself; his laughter was infectious; it was just stupid and cute and stupid. “Gareth was right.” He said. You turned your head back slightly, unable to see anything really, before giving up and leaning into the pillow again. “Bout what?” He leaned his head on your shoulder, lips nearing your ear. “Told me this wouldn’t work.” Interesting really, since he ushered you into asking him into this at the start. You’re suitably confused. He’s holding you, giggling in your ear, body warm against yours in this stupidly large bed that he’d made feel tiny, after convincing your family how in love you are, and he said it wasn’t working. That Gareth, your biggest influencer, had also predicted it. Well, you’d have said the opposite. 

“This isn’t working.” You have a questioning tone. “Didn’t seem like that downstairs.” You were defensive, rightly so. “No, not like that.” He started. Your grip on his hand loosened and he panicked. ‘Just say what you mean, say what you mean,’ he tells himself. “Turn over.” He leant himself up, still firmly on his side. “Why?” He rolled his eyes. “Please turn over.” He pleaded. “Whyy?” You say again. “Fuck, would you just-“ he shook his hand free from yours, placing it firmly on your hip and he twisted you, so you were flat on your back, facing up at him with surprise. He didn’t expect that to work as well as it did.

“You’re so fucking annoying.” He huffed. “Thanks.” Your arms crossed over your stomach, you tried to avoid his gaze, but he manoeuvred himself so that he was directly above you. He decided you couldn’t be trusted to keep you gaze anywhere but on him. You had to give him a shot. Your expression had softened at the sight of him. Just like he’d hoped. His stupid round cheeks. The dumb smile. Why was he always smiling? 

“I wanna kiss you.” He said. You thought he was childish. “Is holding not enough?” He shook his head. “Never enough.” He leaned in close, but he doesn’t kiss you, not yet. His forehead just pressed against yours, his lips hovered, breath tickling your own mouth. “Can I?” He begged for it. “Yes.” You breathed. He does. His lips brush yours and it’s just as nice as every other kiss he’d given you. You’re not sure why you expected it to be different all of a sudden. You just had the idea that maybe it would be. Now that you, well now that you actually liked it.

But it wasn’t different, it was exactly the same. “Eddie.” You whined. “Yeah?” He was upset that you’d interrupted such a crucial moment. “It doesn’t feel like I thought it would.” Your fingers stroked over his cheek; he arched a brow to question you. “We have kissed before; you remember that right?” He teased. You couldn’t have been that drunk. “Yes. Shut up. That’s not what I meant.” He’s still not on the same page although relieved somewhat that you were in fact sober like he thought.

In his mind that kiss was perfect, electrifying, mind blowing, the best kiss yet, you’d have known it too if you didn’t stop him so quickly. “What’s it feel like?” He tried to understand. You thought for a moment. What did it feel like? Warm, soft, sweet, he was one of the sweetest tastes. Where most men would taste of mint, Eddie didn’t. He tasted like cigarettes and the kiwi and strawberry gum he chewed to mask the scent of them on his breath. It didn’t work completely, it more meshed together into its own unique flavour.

It felt nice. “Feels normal.” You said it like it was a bad thing and he can’t understand why. “What’s so wrong with that?” You tried to shake your head. Shake some sense into yourself. You were blowing it. “Kiss me again.” You didn’t have to ask him twice. He pushed his lips against yours, harder than the first time, much harder. Barely leaving a gap between you. Suffocating you with his kiss. He feels like this time he has to try harder; he needed to give you his all. There had to be more. 

His lips glided over yours, his lips rough but still careful. His tongue poking out slowly, licking gently over your bottom lip. You part it instinctively and the second his tongue slithered across your teeth, you finally felt it. You don’t know why it took you till the second try. You’re so grateful you felt it at all, but you were panicking for a second, thinking you’d made this huge mistake because how could you let yourself fall for him after all this nonsense? Then you felt it, that spark kicking you to life. That fire in your belly, burning you up inside, begging for his coolness to dampen it down. You fucking needed him.

Your hands gripped his shoulders, nails tucking into them just a little. He’s feeling the heat radiating from you, your energy pouring into him. He’s smiling against your mouth as your tongue meets his briefly. He just knows that this time, he’s got you. “You had me worried there for a second.” He panted, not wanting to pull away but needing to say something. You kissed him over and over, distracting him. Now you’d started, you couldn’t stop. “I know, I’m so cruel.” He smirked, kissing you back just as vigorously, hand coming to your throat, resting gently on it before tilting your chin up towards him.

You captured his eyes, so dark, nearing black in the dim light. If it weren’t for the golden flecks you’d be convinced they really were that dark. “Had to be sure.” He pecked your lips. “Yeah?” You did the same. “Yeah.” He’s so close that every time his eyes closed and reopened, you felt his lashes fanning your cheeks. “And now?” He asked so hopefully, heart on the line as he waited on your answer. You wanted to make him wait, torture him a little, not tonight, tonight you were kind enough to put him out of his misery. “Now I want you.” You said. He could have punched the air with excitement. 

You’re kissing again. Scrambling around, his body lowered on top of you, one hand resting on your cheek, the other grazing your hip bone. His body shuddered when you whimpered under the weight of him. You let your legs widen as he slipped between them, all before he lifted your thigh, depositing it safely around his waist. You prayed that he didn’t immediately feel the dampness in your shorts but you’re not the only one struggling.

His hard on rubbed into you, your lips parting with surprise. “Fuck.” He muttered, momentarily halting your make out session, the heat between your thighs overwhelming him. You sensed his embarrassment, his cheeks burning with it. “Me too.” You breathed. Lips pressing a gentle kiss to the tip of his nose as your hand slipped between you, coming down to cup his bulge boldly through his shorts. 

The groan he released is sinful, maybe even painful. He felt big. He felt impossibly big. He wouldn’t fit in your hand, maybe not even in the two of them. He thrust into your hand when he felt you touch him. It was his first instinct; he couldn’t fight it. “Shit, sorry.” You caught his lips, tugging his bottom one between your teeth, releasing it slowly. “Gonna move my hand, want you to do it again.” If he thought he was embarrassed at his neediness before, it was about to get a whole lot more mortifying. 

Your hand moved away, he was grinding his hips down into you as you’d asked, and you felt the way his cock jumped into action. “Baby.” You panted. He’s sure his heart is going to explode, maybe his cock too, probably that first. “Say it again.” He needed it. “Baby.” You kissed him. He’s rocking his hips into you, you started rotating your own, rubbing yourself over his cock, hand moving out of the way. “Baby, baby, fuck.” He’s covered your lips with his, nose mashed up against you, you can’t breathe, you don’t even want to, you wouldn’t miss the feeling. All of this felt so much more important. “Feel so good.” You whine. He never would have thought you’d be so vocal. You didn’t seem like the type. Thought you’d be a bit of a brat maybe but not this, not confident and sexy and so sure of what you wanted. He could love that; he could love you. 

“More, need more.” You’re eyes rolled back when he’s lifting your hips with both hands, pulling your core over him. His cock slipping through your folds through too many barriers of clothing. “Shit Ed.” You felt the sensation of fire burning into you, setting you alight. You’re dizzy and hot and you just felt so good against him. The friction of his shorts might have been frustrating, but it was also, so rewarding. It was such a good roughness against your clothed mound. “Are you?” He can’t even say it, too busy dragging you over his cock. “I’m, fuck, Eddie.” He doesn’t stop, not for a second, not for a beat. He makes you ride it out. He’s so stupidly proud of himself. He’d barely touched you and you’d come undone. You’d actually fucking came. “Fucking unreal for me.” He slowed himself down before he followed a similar path to destruction. 

He’s pushing your hips back down, letting your body sink into the mattress, pulling away from you to catch a breath. “I can’t believe that.” Your hand floats through your hair combing it back. He’s resting back on his knees, still between your legs. “You’re so fucking hot.” His eyes don’t look anywhere but your face. Your shirt is half way up your chest, bare tits poking out for him to see and yet, he doesn’t look.

You can’t say you share the same sentiment. Your eyes raced to the outline of his erection in them grey basketball shorts. You drank in the sight before you and your teeth clamped down into your lower lip. He reached down to squeeze your thigh. “My eyes are up here.” He gestured with his index and middle finger. You smirked up at him. “Kind of wish they weren’t.” You didn’t miss a beat. “Yeah?” You nodded. Eyes falling back to his very, large problem that he now palmed through his clothing. Shit, even his own hand wouldn’t cover him.

“Gonna keep looking or do you feel like helping?” His voice was awfully steady for someone ready to come apart at the mere thought of your touch. “You want me to?” You’re not sure what you’re asking. “Need you to.” He said. You sat yourself up. “Gonna take this shirt off me first?” You looked up at him, eyes wider than he’d ever seen, somehow so innocent even though you were anything but. “Of course, I am.” His hands didn’t waste any time lifting the material off over your head. You felt the bite of a chill rush over you, your nipples hardening, perking up with it. “So, very, sexy.” He can’t believe his luck. You’re amazed that you don’t feel shy, being so exposed to him. Guess that was good, it felt natural, you felt safe. 

“Gonna help you.” You warned, hands slipping down into his shorts. You gasped at the immediate contact with his bare skin. “No underwear.” He smirked down at you. “Fucking slut.” Your hand cupped him just like before, yeah, definitely needs more than one hand. “You love it.” He chanted “I do.” You confirmed, squeezing him hard. The rush of air that left his mouth, oh it made this all so worth it. You tried to be bolder, you took his length in your palm for the first time. You gripped him tight and moaned in unison. He moaned at the feeling of finding home in your soft touch. You moaned; at the way your hand can’t even wrap around him fully. He’s too thick, too girthy, there wasn’t enough of you to take it all. 

“Do something.” He urged, forehead leaning on yours for stability more than anything else. “Ah right, that’s what I was doing.” You play as you sprang to action, your hand lifting to the throbbing head of his cock, letting the trickles of beaded cum roll into your palm before you can cover him in it using it whilst you twist your hand up and down his length. “Ohh, fuck.” It came out gravelly. He’d never thought much of hand jobs, said no to many throughout his life, never being worth the time, never feeling as good as his own hand. This though. You. Your hand. You touched him and he swore your hand was made to hold his cock. Even if that sounded ridiculous, there had to be some way of it being true because he felt so good. His cock was slick and hot, it glided through your grip with ease and your tightened fist on him, it was incredible.

You knew to tug him hard at the base, to loosen around his tip. To constantly use his pooling arousal to your advantage. You worked his cock better than anyone else could, maybe even better than him. You weren’t rushing, you didn’t wank him hard begging for it all to be over, getting bored of the feeling. No, you just touched him. Switching your pace. Listening to his hot little sounds. Paying attention to what made him twitch, what made him rut his hips into your palm. You loved touching him, you wanted to touch him forever, every which way you could. 

He started fucking your hand. He’s not sure he can stop himself and you’re so turned on by it you actually moan. “What are you doing to me?“ He’d never felt like this before. You’d made him so weak. He was desperately thrusting into your fist like a pathetic little virgin, and you were moaning. He had to be making this up, you weren’t real, none of this could have been real. “Fuck Ed.” You’re soaked at the idea of it all, you even clenched down on fucking nothing, the thought of him inside you instead of just the palm of your hand, it’s too much to bear. “Need to fuck me.” You quicken your pace, your hand tugging at him desperately. “Fuck, fuck. Stop, you gotta stop.” He doesn’t want you to, God knows he doesn’t, but if you don’t, he’s gonna fucking bust all over your perfect little hand. 

He forced your hand out of his shorts and you have the audacity to pout up at him when he does. “You’re something fucking else.” He pushed you back, your head drops happily onto your pillow. “Something good I hope.” You toyed with him, and he is about to lose it. “Take these off.” He tugged at your own shorts, and you didn’t budge. “Off.” He commands, climbing off the bed, feet hitting the cold wooden floor of the hotel room. 

You shifted behind him, pulling your shorts and panties down your thighs, tossing the material to the general vicinity of your shirt. Your hands are once again in your hair, combing through it with nerves just eating away at you. You ached for him. Your thighs were squeezed so tightly shut you thought he might never pry them open again. You were on edge, literally dying there waiting. He’d dropped his shorts; they’d hit the ground quietly. He stepped out of them quickly, hand lifting to touch himself, he let out a quiet hiss when he did. He was so turned on, cock so tight and hot in his hand, he’d bury himself in you and never wish to leave. 

He climbed back onto the bed, settling on his knees like he had before. His hand rolled delicately across his tip, soaking himself still, using his own arousal to ready himself for you. His cock had a wet sheen in the light. You thought it looked even more delicious now with a coating like that. Perhaps your legs would part after all. “You sure?” He thinks he knows your answer, but he’d hate himself if he didn’t check. This had all been so perfect, better than he could have ever imagined because God, his imagination wasn’t half as creative enough to make you up. You were far better than anyone he’d ever known. The more he knew you, the better you got. Each and every layer, prettier or wittier or more perfect. You must have been real. Real and a gift made just for him because you had him hook line and sinker. He was dumb to credit himself for thinking he imagined you a few moments ago.

“Fuck me.” You spoke. He shook his head. Leaning over you, tip throbbing hard when it breached your walls for the first time before making a heady retreat, running through your slick, wet, lips instead. “Can’t.” He said. Running his cock up and down, eyes flickering shut, throat drying with his pure fucking thirst for you. “Why not?” You furrowed your brow. He’s right there, all he had to do was enter you. You could just lift your hips and he’d slip his fat cock inside. “Can’t call this fucking, not when you feel this good.” You think you might have passed out when pushed inside of you. “Oh, fuck.” He covered your lips to catch your moan. He didn’t think about the fact he’d be sinking in further, bottoming out, pelvis to pelvis with you when he did. 

Your legs wrapped around him so tightly your heels began to dig into his tasty, round backside. You fasten him in place intentionally. You needed to feel him. Needed to feel him in his entirety, pulsing inside you. He bit down on your shoulder till he tasted a metal zing of fresh blood, he’d apologise at a later date. For now, he needed it. You were sopping wet around him, engulfing his cock in a warm, tight sleeve. With each breath you took he slipped a little bit further inside. You felt so full you’d felt him bulging in your stomach, so far inside you it even hurt you.

“I need to move, gotta let me move.” He locked eyes with you before you nodded, loosening your legs, letting him withdraw his hips, pulling right back away from you, tip nearly leaving the crevice of your wetness. Then he pushed back in, all the way, hips against hips and you fucking moaned. You moaned so loud he thought he hurt you, ready to withdraw and panic at that thought. But then you lifted your hips to meet his. You meet his next thrust and then the next, and the next. You don’t let him do a damn thing without your involvement. You needed to be in this together because what’s the fucking point if you can’t give each other your all? 

“You’re so wet, soaking me.” You can only sigh, you’re not sorry, he got you so damn good he ought to be proud. “So damn hot. Gonna need to change the fucking sheets.” He rambled on. His hands dig delicious bite marks into your hips. Yours place a similar attack atop his shoulders. “Feel unreal.” You captured his lips in a needy kiss, chest pushing up as your back arched involuntarily. “Very real, so fucking real.” You muttered. As your back arched further, Eddie found a place within you, a sensitive spot he angled into unexpectedly. A place you’d only ever touched yourself. You shook, and you clenched down on him, hard. 

He’d be an idiot not to notice it. You were clamping down so much he worried he’d lose circulation all together. “You want me dead don’t you?” He slammed his hips down into you. “Won’t be happy till I’m not fit for anyone else, that it?” His chest flattened against yours, his cock reaching that angle even more intrusively than before and you’re about to scream for it.

He’s got so much pressure leaning against it you’re about to crumble and he doesn’t even know it. “Eddie.” You panicked, hands snaking into his hair, tugging his brown ringlets. He couldn’t get any closer to you and yet you needed it, wanted him covering you. “Fuck, you’re, fuck are you cumming?“ He leaned his head back, looking down into your eyes, you have tears brimming in them and he can’t believe it, he was so right. “Please, please don’t stop.” Your voice came out so weak, soft, precious, and broken and he thought you sounded like a needy little princess when you begged for him like that. “Anything, anything for you.” He meant it too. 

His hand wrapped around your throat loosely and tenderly as he coaxed your second orgasm from you. Your scream caught in your throat. He kissed you hard, breathing life erratically back into you. The way you tightened around his cock has his eyes roll back into his skull, his teeth biting down hard on your plump, cherry lips. He’s so close to cumming himself, but he will not let himself go until you’ve done it first. He had to make it through. He had to feel the way you came around his dick for the first time. Needed it imbedded in his brain as the religious experience it certainly felt like it would be.

“Eddie, Eddie,” you’re not even aware you’re yelling his name out there. You just do it. That’s what gets him in the end. Your pretty little voice wrapping around his name, securing the idea that he was in fact the guy who’d made you crumble into a mess in these sheets, twice. It was all him. “Where, fuck, where do you-“ he can’t even say it, can’t get the words out. “In me, need it in me, please baby.” 

He did as you asked, his hips pulsing into you, cock sputtering, leaking his hot cum inside you. You felt it all. Deep inside, covering you, damning you. You were claimed from the inside out. There wasn’t a single piece of you that wasn’t marked as his now. If you hadn’t felt full before, you certainly did now. His cum filling you entirely, anything his cock couldn’t previously reach was now pressured by him cum flooding inside you and it was so unbelievably good. You sighed heavily at the thought of it. “So, fucking good.” You muttered. Him filling you was just so erotic to you. He’d felt exactly the same because of course he did, he was made for you. He loved that you’d let him take you like that. It felt heavenly pouring himself into you, coating you in his colours. Pulling out might just be the hardest thing he’d ever have to do. 

His body covered yours. He’s no strength to hold himself above you, but no way of pulling away just yet. You’d not minded his weight at all. You’d actually enjoyed it, felt comforted by it. Even if your bodies were sweat soaked and desperately in need of another shower, it felt nothing but perfect lying here a little longer. Your fingers massaged into his scalp, he hummed at the relief of your touch. His breathing slowed down, softly blowing over your chest where his head lay comfortably.

You decided you loved the sound of him breathing. You can’t explain exactly why that is, but it offered you some kind of comforting stimulation that you think you’d listen to happily for hours. The mere existence of him, being enough to soothe you. “So that, uh-“ he licked his bottom lip, wetting the dryness there. “That happened.” You heart leaped and you know he felt it. “Don’t make it weird.” You nearly begged. “I’m not making it weird.” You poked his head. “You’re making it weird.” You accused, poking him again. “Would you stop?”

He lifted his head this time to avoid another attack. Well fuck. If he thought you looked beautiful before, it had nothing on the way you looked now. You were flustered and tired, your eyes wet with tears and probably sweat and yet, gorgeous. “You’re staring.” He hated you. “I can’t stop.” He’s lying. He could, he just never wanted to. “What will people think?” You gasped. “How will we tell them?” He continued, following your train of thought like he’d conjured it himself.

“Well, what do we actually have to tell? You know, to get our story straight.” He knew that was your not-so-subtle way of asking what you were, after all of this, but he doesn’t mind it because he’d also liked to know. As cliché as it was. It really did happen that fast. “Well,” he rubbed your cheek with the back of his hand, watching as your face leaned into his touch. “Your family think we’re in love so, that’s kind of handled.” You laughed. “That you’re way of confessing your love for me?” You dig with a smile. “No.” Yes. But it was way too soon to verbalise that. Sure, you’d known him for a while, but this weekend was the closest you’d ever been. And yeah, he may have felt it in his bones, but he wasn’t crazy enough to admit it to you. Jesus Christ. “So, it’s just, everyone else.” He nodded, then repeated after you. “Everyone else.” Easier said than done. 

“What if I uh, slip you another 200?” He rolled his eyes. Only you would ask that. “Oh, because I haven’t whored myself out enough?” You grinned. “Well, if the shoe fits baby.” He nudged your nose with his own. “No but seriously, what would 200 get me?” You tried to deadpan but the smile refused to leave you. “I’m refunding it by the way.” You feigned shock. “My money not good enough for you Munson?” He looked at you with a ‘you really asking me that?’ look on his face. Though technically, you hadn’t actually given the money to him yet. “Only asked for it because I knew it’d piss you off sweetheart.” That hadn’t surprised you at all. “I dragged my ass to the bank for nothing.” He thought he might howl with laughter. 

“You got cash out?” There he goes, those chubby fucking cheeks, the crinkling eyes. “You actually withdrew 200 bucks for me?” You wanted the bed to swallow you whole. “I DON’T EXACTLY HAVE YOUR BANK DETAILS EDWARD!” You yelled and he laughed harder, nearly rolling off you all together until he remembered he was still very much inside of you. “I’m so fucking dumb.” You face palmed with the embarrassment of it all. “You kinda are.” He agreed. He knew you’d hate his lack of support. “I like em dumb though.” He also knew he deserved the flick you gave him. “We’ll get you to the bank tomorrow, don’t you worry babe.” This time you didn’t flick him. “Not going anywhere tomorrow.” You sighed, arms wrapping around him. His stomach fluttered when you held him like that. “Why, what you got planned?“ He nuzzled his face happily into your breast, his spare hand squishing the other nicely. “Gonna get my fucking money’s worth that’s what.” 

[writingwithciara]

18 ~Matt Sturniolo~

summary: y/n’s family wants her home for the holidays and this year, they’re expecting her to bring a guest. she struggles to find someone who her parents will love so she settles on someone who doesn’t fit the image her parents have for her, or so she thinks

word count: 7.9k (she’s a long one)

pairing: matt sturniolo x reader

notes: loosely based off the song ‘18’ by anarbor (that was the goal but it changed halfway through) also was supposed to post this around christmas but i never got around to it. also might post a part 2 for valentine’s day but who knows 🤷🏻‍♀️

part 2 !

“Yes, dad. I’ll be there Saturday morning.”

“With a special friend I hope.”

“Yeah. A special friend indeed.” y/n began chewing on her fingernails. She knew her dad really wanted her to find someone and she had been trying a lot recently. But nobody she went out with fit her dads perfect image. He wanted her to find someone who was not only a gentleman but someone she could easily get along with. There was only 1 person she could think of who fit that but he’s gay so she knew that wouldn’t fool her dad.

“Okay sweetie. We’ll see you Saturday morning.” Her dad chuckled and hung up the phone. y/n dropped her phone and laid on her bed, slowly losing faith.

After a few moments, she dialed Nick’s number and waited for him to pick up the FaceTime request.

“Hey. What’s up?” he smiled at her and noticed her expression. “Everything okay?”

“Not really. I’m having a crisis that I don’t know how to handle.” She sighed and noticed his background. “Are you filming right now?”

“No. I’m just in the car waiting for Chris and Matt.” He looked out the window. “What’s your crisis?”

“I told dad this year would be the year I came home to visit and right before he hung up just now, I promised to bring a ‘special friend’ this time. The problem is, I don’t have a special friend to bring home and I don’t want to break my father’s heart. What am I going to do?”

“I can help if you want.”

“That’s lovely, Nicolas but you’re gay and even though you do fit my dad’s perfect image-“

“Aww, thank you.”

“I just can’t bring you home with me. Sorry.”

“I was suggesting that I help find someone for you.” he looked back out the window. “Oh, Matt could work.”

“No, I don’t think so. Matt is the complete opposite of what my dad wants for my future.” y/n sighed. “What about Chris?”

“Honesy, if Matt is the complete opposite of what your dad wants for you, then Chris ain’t what you’re looking for.”

“You’re right. Maybe I’ll just have to disappoint him this year.”

“How long do you have to find someone?”

“I told my dad I’d be there Saturday morning so the flight leaves Friday.”

“That gives us 3 days to find the perfect guy for you.” Nick set his phone down. “The boys are coming back and we’re going to be filming so I’m gonna have to let you go.”

“Okay. I’ll talk to you later then.” y/n went to hang up but Nick stopped her.

“Come by the house later and we can discuss this some more. I’m sure we’ll find someone.”

“Alright. See you later.” y/n hung up and looked up at her ceiling. Maybe she had to rethink her options.

Later that night, y/n found herself in the same position but this time she was on Nick’s bed. He was laying next to her as they went through a list of possible guys.

“How about Jordan?” Nick shot up and looked at his best friend.

“No way in hell. I never want to see that jerk again.”

“Okay. Um, maybe we can get Nate to do it.”

“I love Nate but he’s not exactly ideal for the occasion.” y/n picked up her phone. “We’ve gone through all the possibilities. There’s nobody good enough to bring home to my dad.”

“Maybe we need to think outside the box.”

“And what do you mean exactly?”

“Maybe you need to bring home the opposite of what your dad wants for you.”

“Then we would have to narrow that down to who’d be most willing to go and someone who I can actually stand being around for 3 days.” y/n looked through the list and none of the names stuck out. “This is hopeless.”

“Wait, hold on.” Nick put his finger to his lips for a second and then smiled. “You said earlier that Matt was the complete opposite, right?”

“Yeah.” y/n matched his smile. “And I actually enjoy spending time with him. I should ask him.”

“The worst he could say is no.” Nick opened his bedroom door and the duo ventured into the living room together. Matt looked up from his phone and smiled.

“Hey, Matt. Can I ask you for a favor?”

“That depends. Is it dangerous and/ or disgusting?”

“No, of course not.” y/n sat in the open seat next to him and took a deep breath. “I promised my dad I’d be bringing someone home for the holidays and I don’t want to disappoint him so I was wondering-“

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t want to be the one who disappoints your dad. I hate disappointing people. I’m sorry.”

“It’s totally fine.” y/n stood up and grabbed her phone. “Well, Nick. Thanks for trying to help me. This has been fun but I think I’m going to head home and start packing.”

Matt went to walk back to his bedroom but Nick stopped him and silently pleaded with is younger brother. Matt just  rolled his eyes and headed back to the living room. “Wait. I’ll go with you.”

“You will?”

“On one condition.”

“What is that?”

“If your dad finds out we’re not actually dating, you have to take all the blame.”

Thursday night rolled around and y/n found herself back in Nick’s bedroom, doing a final check to make sure she had everything she would need.

“I can’t believe you got Matt to agree to come with me.”

“It wasn’t difficult, really. All I did was give him a look.”

“And he just gave in? That’s odd.”

“Maybe he likes you.”

“No. Don’t even think about that. Gross. Not my type at all.” y/n protested.

“You don’t have to like him that way. I’m just saying it is a possibility.” Nick shrugged his shoulders and looked down at y/n. “Anyway, do you have everything?”

“Yes. And even if I didn’t, I could always grab stuff when I get there.” y/n smiled and looked at Nick’s computer. “I think I should probably get some sleep soon. I know the flight is tomorrow night but I don’t want to wake up too late.”

“Can you manage to stay up for a movie?” Nick pleaded and y/n knew she couldn’t say no to him.

“Fine. Just one.”

The one movie turned into 3 and they ended up staying up all night. By the next afternoon, Matt was fully rested while y/n was moving around slowly.

“This is why you’re supposed to go to bed at a decent hour, y/n.” Matt chuckled as he handed her a cup of her favorite coffee. “I know the flight doesn’t leave until later tonight but I was thinking we go early & beat the traffic. And maybe we can rehearse our story on the plane.”

“Yeah. I guess that’s a plan that can work.” y/n took a sip of the coffee. “But how early are we talking?”

“I’m planning on leaving in about an hour.” Matt looked at his phone. “It’ll be about 2:30 then and it takes an hour to get to the airport. Flight leaves at 6. It’s about a 5 hour flight so we’d be getting there pretty late so I booked us a hotel room for the night. Of course, if that’s alright with you.”

“Oh my goodness. That thought was running through my head after I got off the phone with my dad but I completely forgot to do that. Thanks, Matthew.”

“No problem. I figured you’d be dealing with other stuff so I figured I could take care of this one little thing.” Matt smiled and began heading to his room. “Oh. The room has 2 beds, because I figured it would be weird for you.”

When he disappeared behind his door, Nick looked at y/n with a knowing smirk. “He’s been thinking about you. How sweet.”

“Shut up, Nicolas.” y/n turned to Chris. “I know you two like to fight a lot so please don’t kill my best friend while I’m gone.”

“I can’t guarantee anything.” Chris chuckled and threw his hands up. “But I will try my absolute best while you’re gone.”

“That’s all I ask, Christopher.” y/n smiled and went to grab her bag from Nick’s room. When she returned, Matt was packing some food into a bag. She gave him a look and he shrugged.

“Snacks for the trip because, like Nick, you like to snack a lot. Thought it’d be best to be prepared.” He set the bag down on the counter and looked at her. “This was supposed to be a surprise. Thought I would have it all done by the time you got out of the room.”

“Sorry for spoiling the wonderful surprise.”

“I’m just doing what a good boyfriend would do.” He chuckled, mostly to himself and grabbed the bag. “I’ll meet you out in the car.”

“Guess I’ll see you guys in a few days.” y/n hugged each boy quickly and headed out to the car.

The car ride was faster than they thought it would be and they arrived at the airport almost 3 hours early. When they boarded the flight, Matt did some more time calculations and estimated that they would be arriving in Miami around midnight.

So, when they landed in Miami and 11:57, Matt couldn’t help but be proud of his estimation. He smirked and y/n laughed at his excitement.

“Okay wise guy. Let’s head to the hotel so we can finish going over the story. My dad wants to meet for breakfast in the morning and he’s gonna have a lot of questions.”

Matt lead her to the rental car and held the door for her. When she got in, he took a brief moment to think about details for the story that would be believable before he got in the car and headed to the hotel.

At the hotel, y/n was relieved to actually see 2 beds and not have a cliché mix up where they’d have to share a bed. It felt weird sharing a room with Matt, though she supposed she would have to get used to it, seeing as she’d be doing it for 3 days.

“Okay, so I was thinking about the length of this ‘relationship’ and I think it’d be believable if we say it’s been 10 months.”

“Coincidentally, I was thinking the same thing. Maybe we say I asked you out for Valentine’s Day and it blossomed from there.” Matt smiled and sat on the empty bed. “How romantic should we say the date was?”

“On a scale of 1 to 10, I’d say a 7. Not too romantic for a first date but just romantic enough to be believable.”

“Got it.” Matt pulled his notebook out and jotted some notes down. “Okay, what else do we need to discuss?”

“Hmm.” y/n pondered the question for a moment. “Who should we say fell in love first? That’ll definitely get my dad hooked onto the story.”

“Well in that case, we should say I fell first. We can say that when Nick introduced us over a year ago, it was instant for me but you took a while longer to warm up to the idea. Maybe we could also say that I finally won you over when you saw how much I really cared about my brothers.”

“Sounds cheesy, but I actually like it.” y/n leaned against her headboard. “So far, the story is that when we met, you were instantly in love with me. But I didn’t care much for you at first. Then, I saw how caring you could be and when you asked me out on Valentine’s Day, I said yes. And we’ve been together ever since.”

“Yeah. That sounds good.”

“What if my dad asks about your future?”

“Then I’ll say that I want to marry you, but only when the time is right. And that I want at least 2 kids so they’ll always have a lifelong best friend. Siblings are the best thing you could ever have in life.”

“Perfect answer. I’m an only child but my dad has 3 brothers and they’re super close so he’ll love that answer. He’ll probably tell you how much he feels bad about not giving me a sibling.”

“And I can just say that my brothers already treat you like family, so you get to experience all of the sibling stuff in LA. Albeit, a little late in life, but that they would do anything for you if you asked them to and that you guys also fight like real siblings sometimes.”

“Who are you and what have you done with the real Matthew?” y/n looked over at him and saw the biggest, goofiest smile on his face. “Are you real?” she reached across the gap to poke at him but he swatted her hand away and finished writing the notes down.

“I’m 100% real, baby.” He smirked playfully and set the notebook down on the table. “Are we all set for the story?”

“Yes. I believe so.” y/n got under the covers and looked at him one last time before turning off the lamp. “Goodnight, Matt.”

The next morning, Matt woke up first and almost forgot where he was. But then he looked at the bed next to him and saw y/n sleeping peacefully and he remembered they were in Miami. He glanced back at y/n after checking the time and noticed her stirring. When her eyes opened, she smiled.

“Good morning, Matthew.”

“Good morning, sleepy head.” He chuckled and climbed out of bed. “We have to meet your dad in an hour.”

“Dad and his girlfriend.” y/n stretched and went to her bag to grab an outfit.

“You want first shower?” Matt asked her, causing y/n to nearly drop her phone in shock.

“Yes.” she grabbed her stuff and ran to the bathroom. Matt chuckled and went on his phone. There was a missed call from Nick and a few hundred texts from both of his brothers. He clicked on Nick’s contact and waited for the answer.

“Oh thank god you’re not dead!” was the first thing that came out of Nick’s mouth. “You need to answer your phone more often, asshole. We were worried.”

“Yeah. Really worried, jackass.” Matt heard Chris’ voice in the background. “How’s Miami?”

“It’s actually going really well. We got so many details for our ‘relationship’ story that her dad is going to love.”

“That’s awesome. Can I talk to y/n?”

“She’s in the shower but when she comes out, I’ll tell her to call you while i take my turn.”

“You let her have first shower? Who are you?” Nick joked. “Okay. Just tell her to call me when she’s done. I have something important to tell her.”

“And not me?”

“It’s about you, actually.” Matt could hear Chris laughing in the background, no doubt because he said something he wasn’t supposed to. He just chuckled and said a quick goodbye before hanging up on his brother. Y/n walked out of the bathroom a few moments later and smiled. “Hey. Nick wants you to call him while I’m in the shower.”

“Okay.” She immediately clicked on his name while Matt disappeared. When Nick’s face flashed on her screen, she smiled.

“Glad to see you’re not dead. Do you ever answer your phone?”

“I was in the shower.” She giggled and looked at the bathroom door. “What’s up?”

“I have something super important to talk to you about. It involves Matthew.”

“What is it?” she looked at the 2 boys on her screen and when they kept exchanging looks, it started worrying her. “If you guys don’t say anything, I’m going to freak out.”

“Apparently some girl has been going around LA saying she’s dating Matt. Thought I’d let you know, just in case it comes up at some point while you guys are away.”

“Oh. That’s not that big of a deal. It’s not like it’s a real relationship between us. If he is dating her, that’s alright.”

“Just don’t let your dad hear about it. I’m sure he wouldn’t be too happy that his daughter is getting ‘cheated’ on.”

“I’ll do my best to keep him of the internet.” y/n smiled and looked back at the bathroom. “I’ll talk to you guys later tonight.” She ended the call just as Matt emerged from the bathroom. “How was your shower?”

“Refreshing.” He chuckled and picked up his phone. “So what did Nick have to talk to you about?”

“Apparently some girl has been going around LA saying that you guys are dating. He just told me to keep the news away from my dad.”

“Oh, must be Jessica.”

“Who the hell is Jessica?” y/n raised an eyebrow and suddenly realized how jealous that sounded so she dialed it back a bit. “I mean, who’s Jessica?”

“I went on one date with her 6 months ago and she’s been stalking me ever since. Nothing to be worried about. I only have eyes for you.” he playfully winked at her and grabbed the car keys. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah. Let’s do this.” y/n followed him out to the car. As they parked at the restaurant they’d be meeting her dad at, y/n looked at Matt. “How are you feeling?”

“Honestly, a little nervous. I never met a girls dad before. What if he hates me?”

“Matthew Bernard,” y/n paused her sentence and squeezed his hand. “he will not hate you. I promise. You have nothing to be nervous about. I’m going to be with you the entire time.”

“Thanks.” He looked out the window. “Should we head in now?”

“Yeah. Let’s do it!” y/n got out of the car and grabbed Matt’s hand again when he approached her. They walked in and Matt followed y/n to a table where another couple sat. He stayed a little behind her as she greeted the man and woman with hugs.

“It’s good to see you sweetheart. It’s been too long.” The woman beamed brightly.

“I know. I’ve just been really busy out in LA these last few months.” y/n looked back at Matt. “Speaking of busy, I would like you guys to meet my boyfriend. Dad, Crystal, this is Matt. Matt, this is my dad and his girlfriend.”

“It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard nothing but wonderful things about you two.”

“I wish I could say the same but y/n has failed to tell me anything about you.”

“I’m sorry about that, Dad. But I didn’t want to oversell him and have him not meet your expectations.”

“Well, is he treating you good?”

“Absolutely. The most perfect gentleman.”

“Then my expectations are met.” y/n’s dad smiled at Matt and they sat back at the table. As they ate, Matt found himself warming up to y/n’s dad and his girlfriend. She was right. He really had nothing to worry about.

“So since you two have been dating for quite some time, I would assume you know a lot about my daughter.”

“Well, dad, Matt doesn’t-“

“I know lots about her.” Matt looked at y/n and smiled. “What questions do you have for me, sir?”

“What is her favorite color?”

“Her favorite color is green. That was an easy one.”

“Okay. Um, what is her favorite meal?”

“Okay, that’s a little tougher. But I know it really depends on her mood. If she’s sad, she prefers chili with shredded cheese. If she’s happy, her favorite meal is a nice juicy cheeseburger with a side of french fries. If she’s angry, the best food to give her is a crunchy taco so she can take out her frustration by breaking the shell.” Matt glanced over at y/n and smiled. “And her comfort food is vanilla ice cream topped with hundreds of sprinkles and drizzled with warm, not hot, caramel sauce.”

“I think it would’ve been best if you just told us everything you know about her instead of me asking, huh?”

“Dad, stop.” y/n giggled and hid her face in Matt’s arm. “You’re lucky I love you guys.”

“We love you too, honey.” y/n’s dad smiled as he reached for the bill. Matt was faster and already had his wallet out.

“Please, allow me.” Matt placed the money on the table, along with a generous tip for the waitress, before y/n’s dad could fight against him. Her dad just smiled and watched as Matt’s arm found its way around y/n’s waist. He was pleased knowing that his daughter had found someone so caring and attentive.

“Well, sweetheart, we’re going head off. Are you gonna be staying at the house tonight?”

“That’s what I was originally planning. If Matt is okay with it.”

“Of course. That sounds like fun.” Matt stood up from the booth and took y/n’s hand.

“We’ll meet you guys there in a bit. There’s something I wanna show Matt.”

“Okay. See you lovebirds later.” Crystal hugged y/n and waved to Matt before heading out to the car. Y/n turned to Matt and smiled.

“I had no idea you knew that much about me.”

“Well, most of it is from being very attentive but I had to get a few bits of information from Nick and Chris.”

“Still. You remembered it and I think my dad likes you.”

“Good. Then our plan is working.” He continued to hold her hand even as they got in the car. “So where did you want me to go? What did you want to show me?”

“When I was 9, my cousins and I found this really cool tree but that’s that not the cool part. The best part about it is that it leads to this really cool spot and I only bring the best people there. So you better feel lucky.”

“Oh, I do.” He smiled and listened to her directions. Within minutes, he was pulling up to an odd looking tree. “Is this it?”

“Yes.” y/n happily jumped out of the car and ran to the tree. Matt followed slowly behind her and chuckled to himself as she danced around the field. She never cared what anyone thought of her and that was why Matt admired her so much. He would never admit it, but he just found her incredibly attractive and fascinating. “Come on, Matthew. We haven’t even made it to the best part.”

“Right behind you.” he chuckled and followed her further. When they finally stopped, Matt was staring at one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen. It was a hidden waterfall that pooled out into the most mesmerizingly blue body of water. Y/n stood at the edge of the water and looked around.

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?”

“Mesmerizingly so.” He took a step towards her and when she looked up at him, he knew exactly what she was thinking.

“Wanna take a dip in the water?”

“We’re not exactly dressed for the occasion.” Matt chuckled. “Besides, we promised to meet your dad back at his house.”

“Okay fine. But we should come back tonight. It’s even more magical at night.” She wiggled her eyebrows and headed back towards the car before Matt could give her an answer.

For the rest of the day, Matt got a tour from y/n and a big speech from her dad about their future. When everyone had gone to bed for the night, y/n convinced Matt to sneak out of the house and head back to the waterfall. She was right when she said it was magical at night.

However, Matt couldn’t bring himself to look at the water. He was instead focused on the way y/n had stripped down to almost nothing and was encouraging him to do the same. Not knowing what came over him, Matt quickly rid himself of all his clothes, leaving him in only his boxers. Y/n smiled and held his hand.

“Ready do go for a swim?” she winked and pulled him into the water with her before he could say yes. Her impulsiveness was another thing he admired about her. As she swam around, she felt Matt’s gaze on her. “What are you thinking about, Matthew?”

“Just thinking about how cool this place is and how lucky I am that you chose to show it to me. Never have I felt so lucky in my life.”

“Well after today, I feel like you deserve to have a little fun. Hope my dad didn’t scare you too much.”

“It was actually really nice getting to know him. He’s a really good guy and he raised a really great daughter.”

“He’s not around. You don’t have to suck up to him, Matt.” y/n rolled her eyes playfully and splashed a little water at him. “But I do appreciate the compliment.”

Matt splashed her back and his smile only grew when she began to laugh. “You know, I thought I was going to hate this trip but it’s only the first night and I am already enjoying it. Makes me excited for what’s to come.”

“You’re going to absolutely love meeting my cousins. They watch your videos like 24/7 and they’re 12 so when they see you, they’re going to be so excited.”

“Oh, wow. I can’t wait.” Matt smiled and swam cover to where y/n was. “The moon is bright tonight. Really brings out the green in your eyes.”

“Really? I think it makes my eyes look dull.” She tried looking away from him but he grabbed her chin and made her look directly into his eyes.

“Your eyes are so beautiful and I’m trying really hard not to kiss you right now.”

“Same.” y/n’s eyes widened as she spoke. She was not expecting to hear that come out of her mouth ever.

“Well, maybe we should’ve added it to the list of details for the story. Make something up, or something.”

“Or we could get the pesky ‘first kiss’ story out of the way and have something true about our history.”

Just as their lips were about to connect, Matt backed away. “I think we should head back to the house before someone realizes we snuck out.”

“Oh. Okay.” y/n tried to not let her disappointment show in her tone as she swam towards the edge of the water. Matt followed and got dressed silently. The car ride back was slow and silent, not to mention incredibly awkward. Whatever moment they were having at the waterfall was clearly over and didn’t seem like it would happen again anytime soon.

As they slowly climbed back into y/n’s bedroom, there was a heavy tension between them. Matt looked at her and felt so stupid for not kissing her when he had the opportunity.

“I’m sorry about that.” He looked down at his feet.

“It’s okay.” She turned her back to him and sighed. Matt noticed it as an anxiety breath. He wanted to go over and comfort her but he didn’t want to cross any boundaries. “We should get some sleep.”

“Yeah we should.” Matt took a step towards the bed but stopped. “Should I sleep on the floor so it’s not uncomfortable sharing a bed?”

“No. You can sleep up here with me.” y/n turned to look at him and for a second, Matt had hope he hadn’t fucked everything up. “I have enough pillows to put between us. It’ll be fine.” She began to build a small wall down the middle of the bed. Matt watched her carefully. He could tell she didn’t want to do it but they both knew they needed something to keep them from getting too close.

“I know you said it’s okay but I truly am sorry.” Matt slowly climbed onto one side of the bed while y/n got in the other side. “Good night, y/n.”

“Good night, Matthew.”

When Matt woke up the next morning, the pillow wall was completely demolished and y/n was wrapped up in his arms. He smiled and pretended to be asleep when he felt her stir.

Y/n opened one eye and noticed how close she had gotten to Matt overnight. A small smile spread across her face and she couldn’t help but get closer. He was so warm. He subconsciously pulled her closer and when he opened his eyes again, he caught her looking at him.

“Morning.” He smiled. Even though they were both awake and there was no need to be cuddled together, neither of them wanted to let go. It was as if the almost-kiss last night didn’t happen and everything was alright between them.

“Good morning, sleepy head.” y/n smiled and finally rolled out of his grasp. She checked her phone and noticed they had slept later than either of them had wanted. “Crap. We slept in. My family is gonna be here any minute.”

“You’re right.” He slowly turned away as y/n got out of bed and began to change in front of him without thinking. When she was done, she turned towards him and giggled.

“You didn’t have to look away, Matt. It’s not like you haven’t seen me like this before.”

“All those times were accidents. And besides, it’s not polite to watch a lady change.”

“You’ve been acting differently since we started this trip. Are you feeling alright?” y/n approached him and placed her hand on his forehead. Suddenly aware of the close proximity, Matt held his breath. “Well, you’re a little warm but that’s nothing to be concerned about.” y/n dropped her hand to his shoulder. “You should get dressed now.”

“Right.” He stood up awkwardly and grabbed some clothes. Y/n noticed his internal struggle and she went to the door.

“You can get changed in here. I’ll be downstairs.”

“Wait. You can stay. It’ll just take a second.” Matt slowly slipped his sweatpants on and quickly replaced his shirt. As he did so, y/n noticed the way his arms flexed as he raised them above his head. She tried to look away before he noticed but when he smirked, she knew she had been caught. “Like what you see?” he teased.

“Shut up.” y/n rolled her eyes and walked out of the room with Matt following closely behind. They made their way to the kitchen where Crystal was busy preparing stuff for lunch.

“Well, good morning lovebirds.” She smiled. “I was going to wake you earlier but you guys looked so cute all cuddled up in bed. Figured I would let you sleep a little longer.”

“Thanks, Crystal.” y/n smiled and sat on the stool at the island. Matt took the seat next to her and smiled. “What’s for lunch?”

“We’re just going to do a basic barbecue since your cousins are coming over soon. We know how picky they are.”

“And you can never go wrong with a good old fashioned barbecue.” Matt looked up and smiled.

“Yes, exactly.” Crystal grabbed a few things from the fridge and put them on a tray. “Your father is outside working on getting the grill started.”

“I think I’m gonna go talk to him.” Matt stood up and headed outside. Crystal turned to y/n with a wide smile.

“He’s so cute and such a gentleman.”

“Yeah, I suppose he is.” y/n watched the door as if Matt would reappear any second.

“You should’ve heard all the nice things he was saying to your dad last night. That boy is head over heels for you, y/n.”

“It’s not real.” y/n blurted out, quickly turning to Crystal with wide eyes. Crystal herself was just as shocked.

“What are you talking about?”

“The relationship. It’s not real. Not even close.” She sighed. Why was she suddenly so upset?

“I’m still not following, dear.” Crystal had a little bit of a clue as to what was being said but she wasn’t believing any of it.

“I didn’t want to disappoint you guys this year so when dad called and asked if I was bringing someone home for Christmas, I panicked and said yes. Then I was struggling to find someone to agree to come here with me so I got my best friend’s brother to do it.”

“Honey, you could never disappoint us. And honestly, from what I saw, it doesn’t seem so fake to me.”

“Huh?”

“When that boy talks about you, he gets a sparkle in his eye that lights up every feature of his face. I’ve known you for quite some time and I know some of the boys you actually dated and none of them ever looked that way when talking about you. Hell, they never really talked that much about you or knew anything about you. But Matt does. He truly cares for you, sweetheart. And whether it’s actual love or plain admiration, it’s there and it’s real.”

“No. He doesn’t.” y/n sighed. “Please don’t tell dad or anyone else that I told you. Not yet anyway.”

“You got it, honey. My lips are sealed.” Crystal winked just as Matt walked back inside. He slid his arm around y/n’s waist with a smile.

“How are you lovely ladies doing?”

“We’re doing just fine.” Crystal picked up the tray and headed for the door. “Talk to you two later.”

Matt looked down at y/n when Crystal left and noticed she was tense. “hey. You alright, pretty girl?”

“What?” she shook her head and looked down at where his arm was still sitting then looked back up at him. “Yeah. I’m fine. I was just thinking.”

“What about? What’s going on in that pretty little mind, huh?”

“I told Crystal this relationship is fake.” y/n ignored the compliment and focused on something different.

“Oh.” Matt dropped his arm and took a step back. “What did she say about it?”

“She didn’t understand what I was saying at first and then I told her that I only did it to not disappoint her and my dad. She told me that I could never disappoint them. And then she said something I never really thought about until now.”

“What was that?”

“She said that whenever you were talking about me last night, your eyes sparkled and lit up every feature of your face. She then told me that, even though the relationship is fake, there’s some real feelings going on.” y/n took a second to glance up at Matt, catching how he was already staring at her. “So, I need to know. Is she telling the truth? Do you have any feelings for me?”

“Um…about that. I, uh-“

Matt was interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell. As y/n went to answer it, he let out a sigh of relief. Seconds later, he was face to face with y/n and some of her cousins. The younger girls began to squeal as they approached him.

“I can’t believe that our y/n is dating a Sturniolo triplet. This is absolutely insane.” The little blonde girl hugged him and he smiled, instantly hugging her back. The boy looked at him and smirked.

“Don’t mind her. She’s been watching your videos for years.”

“It’s perfectly fine. I love meeting fans.” He looked at y/n and smiled.

“Brooke, you can let him go now.” the young boy chuckled and tried to pry his sister off of Matt to no avail.

“But Jackson, I have so much to ask him.”

“Why don’t we let him breathe for a minute before you attack with the questions?” Jackson finally pulled his little sister off and smiled.

“You alright, Matt?” y/n offered him a small smile, which he gladly returned.

“Yeah.” He chuckled and looked at Brooke. “What questions do you have for me?”

“Oh, so many.” Brooke grabbed Matt’s hand and dragged him into the living room. Y/n was about to follow but Jackson stopped her.

“I don’t think you’re going to get very much time with Matt while we’re here.” He chuckled and y/n glanced at the doorway.

“That’s okay. I get plenty of time with him any other day. Plus, he’s really good with kids so this is actually really heartwarming to watch.” y/n walked into the living room and took a seat next to Matt. He was quick to put his arm around her as he listened intently to Brooke’s questions and answered what he could.

They were like that for another hour before the rest of the family arrived. Matt was introduced to everyone while Brooke and a few more cousins stuck to his side. By the time they were all called outside to eat, Matt looked almost exhausted from answering all the questions but he smiled through it all.

While the kids all hurried out to the backyard, Matt and y/n hung back in the kitchen.

“I told you that you were going to be bombarded with questions.”

“That’s alright. I really don’t mind. Your family is amazing.”

“I know they are.” y/n smiled and looked at him. Her smile started fading when she remembered their conversation from before everyone arrived. “Can we talk later?”

“Yeah, of course.” Matt instinctively placed a kiss on the top of her head and went outside, leaving y/n to wonder what just happened.

Later that night, y/n and Matt were back in their hotel room, away from the chaos that was her family. Matt was on his bed while y/n was searching through her suitcase for something.

“What did you want to talk about?” Matt asked, remembering the conversation. He knew what she wanted to talk about but he needed her to ask the question again.

“Honestly, I don’t remember. Maybe I’ll think of it again and ask you in the morning. Oh, that reminds me. Christmas dinner is taking place at my dad’s house around 2 but I told him and Crystal that we’d be there around 10, if that’s alright with you.”

“Yeah that works.” Matt pulled the covers over him and looked at her. He knew she didn’t really forget the question but he didn’t want to bring it up again, in fear of making things more awkward than they already were. Instead, he plugged his phone in and smiled. “Goodnight, y/n.”

“Goodnight.” She headed to the bathroom and Matt slowly fell asleep.

--

The next morning while they were at her dad’s house, Crystal pulled Matt aside for a ‘talk’ that wasn’t really a talk.

“Look, I know the relationship is fake and everything and y/n may never admit this but there’s clearly something real between you two. I know it and maybe you know it too so if you truly do love her, you need to tell her before she slips away from you and ends up with someone else. And believe me when I say this, none of the other boys she has dated have ever made her smile the way you do, or even talked about her like you do. So please, for the sake of everyone’s sanity, just tell her how you feel.”

Matt went to respond but she was gone before he could blink. He found y/n talking with Brooke and Jackson so he decided to join them. “Y/n, can I talk to you for a minute?”

“Yeah sure.” She followed him into the kitchen and watched him lean against the counter. “What’s up, Matty bear?”

“I just, uh, had a talk with Crystal. Well it was more like she talked to me then disappeared.” He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck.

“What exactly did she say?” y/n raised her eyebrow and subconsciously leaned closer to hear what he was about to say.

“She said that-“

“Everyone, can you please come into the living room?” y/n’s dad called out to everyone in the house. Everyone gathered in the living room and y/n watched her dad pull out a ring and propose to Crystal. Matt didn’t pay attention to the whole speech. His focus was on y/n’s reaction. When Crystal said yes, y/n’s eyes welled up with tears and she hugged her dad and Crystal tightly. She noticed Matt watching her and pulled him into the hug as well. Soon enough, everyone was joining in. It was a joyous celebration.

At the dinner table an hour later, y/n’s leg bounced a little more than normal. Matt noticed and he held her hand underneath the table, hoping to calm her down. It worked and she thanked him by squeezing his hand tightly. They were both silent about what they each knew and neither one of them wanted to cross the friendship line, in fear of screwing up possibly the best relationship either of them ever had.

By the time everyone was leaving, y/n found herself talking with Brooke and Jackson again while Matt watched silently.

“You guys are so cute together.” Brooke gushed. “Matt is so cute. OH my goodness. I forgot to ask you how it feels to be dating THE Matthew Sturniolo.”

“It feels different. Better than anything I’ve experienced before. He’s a great guy.” y/n smiled down at Brooke.

“So, do you love him?” Jackson questioned, cocking an eyebrow in anticipation.

“Yeah. Of course. He’s my best friend.” y/n smiled in Matt’s direction. “He’s the best thing that has ever happened to me, honestly. And he treats me so good.”

“Good. Because you’re my favorite cousin and I would hate to find out he hasn’t been treating you well.” Jackson hugged her and followed the rest of his family out the door. Y/n turned to Matt and smiled. As she approached him, he had a big smile on his face.

“What’s up, Mr. Sturniolo? What’s got you so smiley tonight?”

“Your family is absolutely amazing.”

“I agree.” She leaned against the opposite wall in the doorway. “What did you think of my dad proposing to Crystal?”

“I didn’t really hear the speech. Honestly, I was completely zoned out and staring at you the entire time, just watching your reaction.”

“Why?” she was interested to know. It could be the answer she had been looking for since yesterday afternoon.

“It was a beautiful moment. Just had to see your reaction.” He shrugged. “Besides, in a crowded room, my eyes always find you.”

“Oh.” y/n smiled.

“I didn’t get to give you my present!” he exclaimed suddenly, grabbing her hand and dragging her up to her bedroom. He pulled out a box and handed it to her. “M-merry Christmas.”

Y/n opened the box and nearly sobbed at the beautiful necklace before her. She had been wanting this specific necklace for the last 6 months but whenever she went to buy it herself, they happened to be sold out. She never told anyone so how did Matt know and how did he suddenly end up with one?

Matt took the necklace out of the box and moved her hair to the side so he could place it around her neck. As she turned back towards him, her hand went up to play with the charm.

“How did you know?” she looked up into his eyes.

“I saw the way you looked at it that one time we passed it at the store. While you went to go with Chris to that one store, I went back to buy it for you. I figured you would want something that was as beautiful as you.” he moved a piece of hair out of her face and she subconsciously leaned into his touch before she knew what she was doing. But just as fast as that happened, she pulled away just as fast.

“Matt, don’t do this. Please?”

“Do what? Listen to Crystal?”

“What did she tell you to do?” y/n took a step back but Matt walked closer.

“She told me to tell you how I felt or risk losing you to someone else.” He sighed “Look, I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what, Matt?” y/n looked down at her feet.

“I should’ve just fucking kissed you at the damn waterfall. It’s been eating me up inside that I skipped over possibly one of the greatest opportunities of my life because I didn’t want to fuck up our friendship.” Matt stepped back and ran his hands through his hair anxiously. “Crystal was right, y/n. I do have feelings for you. I have for so damn long and that was why I didn’t initially want to come on this trip with you. I was afraid. Afraid I was going to fuck something up and turns out, it’s exactly what I’m doing. I could tell how upset you were when we left the waterfall that night. And that seriously fucking crushed me. Like, how could I be so damn stupid?” he looked at her. and sighed. “Please tell me I didn’t mess our friendship up by completely backing out of that kiss.”

“Matt, take a breath. Just relax.” y/n rubbed his arm up and down before squeezing his hand. “You didn’t mess anything up. I am right here and I am always going to be right here. You could yell at me and call me every possible name you could think of and I would still love you. Because you’re my best friend and that love stretches beyond any human comprehension. You stand out from every single person I know and that makes me love you so much more. And every single detail we came up with for our ‘relationship’ suddenly seems incredibly true. Yeah, maybe you fell in love with me first but I can guarantee that this love right here,” she gestured between them and stepped impossibly closer. “this love is real. As real as you and me, Matt. So no. You didn’t screw up by backing out of the kiss. You just delayed the most perfect moment between us because now, it won’t be a kiss that was just random. It’s going to mean something.”

“What kiss?” Matt questioned, his eyes flicking down to her lips before going back up. Before he had time to register what was going on, she grabbed his face gently and placed her lips on his. Her hands wrapped around the back of his neck while his gripped her waist tightly, as if at any moment, she would slip away like Crystal said. But he knew it wasn’t going to happen. Not anytime soon.

Y/n was the first to break the kiss but her arms stayed around his neck while her fingers danced delicately on the little hairs that were there.

“I know we’re all the way in Florida right now but a part of me keeps thinking that one of your brothers is gonna come bursting through that door to ruin our moment.”

And as if on cue, Matt’s phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and showed the screen to y/n. She laughed when she saw Chris’ face pop up.

“Merry Christmas, bitches. How was your day?” he smirked, somehow knowing that he interrupted an intimate moment. “How’s Miami?”

“It’s great here. Don’t have to put up with you idiots in person.” Matt chuckled and held y/n close.

“I was just calling to wish you both a Merry Christmas but I’m sensing that I interrupted a moment so I’m gonna go before the Mattitude kicks in. Buh-bye.” He abruptly ended the call and Matt shoved his phone back into his pocket.

“Now where were we?” he smirked and kissed y/n again.

taglist: @worldlxvlys @carolinasamattgirl

[azyimnothere]

HEEEEEELLLLOOOO GUYS GUYS GUYS!!!! 💙💙💙

How are we doing today? I know that they were doing great

It's pretty much an idealized version of what I think that Velchid selfie turned out like, I'd imagine that those little star cameras aren't all that great in resolution since they have so much going on in them to just be able to fly, do you think they'd be like drones or something? If that's the case I can just imagine how bad the paparazzi are in Mount Rageous, or would those cameras only be red carpet exclusive? Who knows, but either way I tried to make it look like a little shittier photo with a lot of blinga-ding from reflection and lights. I hope you guys like it! It isn't my best work to be honest but it's nice 😅

Oh and I don't know if this is already a thing or not, because I checked everywhere and couldn't really find it, tell me if you know someone who made this thingy first so I don't falsely claim it as mine okay?

So it's one where Orchid becomes a surprise assistant to Velvet and Veneer! (And of course Velchid is sprinkled in...not really sprinkled in, more like there's a full tub of salt)

So here's a little backstory if you want to know :D

As we know, there was mentioning of an assistant in the movie, or I just imagine it, I'm not sure atp it's 3 in the morning.

Anywhezel, so I thought it would be in one of those accidental encounters by chance.

Crimp had a hard day, on the verge of a breakdown every second because siblings became "kinda" overbearing, and with no assistant around to help (because they most likely quit), she had no help around them. There was nobody who was willing to take the job that was licensed for working and helping celebrities that way because of all the horror stories previous assistants shared around. Siblings didn't really care Crimp was alone with them, so they just put all the extra stuff on her.

Crimp knew she needed a bit of help purely to keep her sanity on the line with her, so she decided to take a walk and think about what to do next (after she made sure siblings were in bed of course). She sat on a bench in the nearest neon-colored park and cried, not knowing what else to do, and had to let it out.

But she heard someone approaching, turns out it was a purple haired mount rageon and she looked at Crimp sadly, and asking her what's wrong. That's how Crimp met Orchid!

Orchid was making her way from the grocery store and saw Crimp crying on the bench late at night, Orchid recognised her easily since Crimp was mentioned a few times by the siblings on social media, there were also some photos. Plus, despite being small she was hard to miss.

Crimp explained her situation and told Orchid she couldn't do everything alone anymore, and that no one was willing to take over a bit of the burden since the siblings simply scared everyone off. Which made Orchid feel sorry for her.

But Orchid figured, that she could perhaps help Crimp out, the job at that doughnut shop she worked at just wasn't payed enough for her to move out of her mom's apartment, she wasn't forced to move but craved some independence ever since she turned 18 (which wasn't that long ago).

A good bonus was that she got to work with her favorite duo! despite it probably, being a little challenging.

Orchid gave that proposition to Crimp, which made Crimp a bit sceptical, Orchid was a nice girl and didn't deserve that kind of stress, but Orchid persisted because Crimp didn't deserve all that stress either.

On the end Crimp agreed, it only had to go through the approval of the siblings first.

And as expected, Veneer didn't really mind who was helping Crimp as long as they helped Crimp in the first place, and everything gets done in time.

Velvet on the other hand wasn't all that for it, she remembered Orchid faintly from a memory of a concert, which meant Orchid was a fan, she didn't want some nosy stalker snooping around. But as she inspected further, and listened to what Crimp had to say, she reconsidered it and ended up agreeing, unenthusiastically.

So that's how Orchid is now a busy celebrity assistant for two.

The story is a little basic, but it is solid I think, there will probably be comics about it in the future if you're interested! 💕

Also here's some Ritzneer I didn't post, warning! Boys kissing!!!

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Love you lovelies!!!! 💙💙💙💙

[bangtanfanfiction]

hopelessly falling  → k. sunwoo (tbz)

Based on this ask.

♢ Pairing: Sunwoo x Idol!female Reader → Idol AU

♢ Word count: 6.8k

♢ Trope: 8th f!member of BTS, strangers-to-lovers, Older!woman x Younger!man

♢ Genre: Fluff, suggestive, angst if you squint ig

⌲ Description: Being the 8th female member of BTS has brought you more trials than you could count. Now being the only one left behind after their enlistments was another obstacle you struggled adjusting to, until you found yourself hopelessly falling for someone completely unexpected. ↳ Warnings: Makeout session, swearing. Sunwoo being a flirty menace but we're loving it.

HOBI: Good luck, Y/N! You’ll crush it like always! JIMIN: You’ll do great! JIN: We’ll be monitoring you :)) YOONGS: Don’t be nervous, you’ll be amazing, kiddo. JOONIE: Y/N fighting! JK: Fighting! TAE: Go, go, go Y/N!

Despite the relentless thumping of your heart, or the cold sweat building up on the surface of your skin - there was no hiding the loving smile pulling at your lips as you scrolled through the messages in the group chat bombarding the notifications without you having to even ask.

Your members knew you well enough at this point after more than ten years together that when you went radio silent on all platforms, it meant you were drowning in your nerves. 

Frankly, how couldn‘t you? You were the last of BTS to release your solo album, and only after all of them had enlisted into the military with you sending them off accompanied by a snotty nose each time. If you could, you probably would have enlisted as well despite being a woman just to not be alone until Seokjin or Hobi were to return. 

Ah…This was hard. You thought, dropping the phone back on the table and looking yourself in the mirror. 

Taking in your elaborate makeup and clothes, hair styled to perfection not a single speck of mascara or blush out of place. You were surrounded by people; your management team and stylists. People who had been with you for more than five years, but the loneliness had never felt more heavy than today.

You thought you had prepared yourself for it. Mentally that is. Your boys had also been exceptionally worried for your mental well-being for when it was time and made sure to give you all sorts of ways to communicate with them. 

The irony was that you actually enjoyed your own space. Being alone at home for days and doing nothing besides your usual workout routine was ideal, truly. 

Until you understood the saying ´You don't know what you have until it's gone.´ 

Clearly not as overly dramatic or depressing as the original meaning. But still, you felt their absence all the same. 

The only comfort you could find from this was Yoongi with his alternative enlistment and still being around for you to find comfort in after his working hours. 

But you hadn’t sought out his presence for a couple of weeks now, being too busy with your prep and wanting to let him get used to his new routine before barging in with your cries of loneliness. 

“Maybe I should get a boyfriend…” You muttered to yourself, catching the delighted attention of your main stylist unnie, Aera, whose eyes widened at those words.

“You want a boyfriend?” She straightened up as if finding a 50 percent off sale on designer goods, making you regret having spoken at all. “Ooo, do you want me to introduce you to someone? I can set up a blind date! You like them like ten years older, don’t you? All alpha male and stuff? I know a couple of men like that.”

Her ranting and frankly too-knowledgeable about your preferences made you heat up in slight exasperation. 

Okay, so what - you tended to gravitate towards buff, white men in their late thirties bordering on forties. Just because you might faint at the sight of Henry Cavill or Chris Evans hardly meant much for your real-life preferences. 

Ask Jimin. You dated him – a brief one year - and he was hardly a carbon copy of Captain America or The Witcher. 

“Unnie, I’ve already told you…”

Aera sighed before mimicking what you hardly believed sounded like yourself. “I know, I know. I’m not looking for anyone, it happens when it happens.”

It wasn’t the first time you’ve had this conversation with her. 

“Besides, why is everyone being so pushy about me finding someone?” You directed this question to the rest of the room, who laughed amongst themselves at the truth of it. 

“Because your last boyfriend was Jimin, and that is honestly sad, darling.” Your manager, Yoo-Mi, piped up from the corner while scrolling through her phone. Probably double checking your upcoming schedules and forward emails to the rest of the staff. She was always working despite you begging her to take it easy sometimes. 

Turning around in your chair, you frowned. “It’s only been three years.” Going into the fourth since your mutual breakup. 

“Exactly, sad.” She didn’t relent, making your shoulders slump, another titter of fond laughter spread through the room. “Listen, Jiminie is great, of course he is. So we don’t blame you for already reaching the top when it comes to standards in men. But when was the last time you had a crush?”

“A crush?” Even the word sounded foreign to you. 

“Henry Cavill does not count.”

“But that’s a crush!” You exclaimed. “I could pull him.”

“That’s not a crush, that’s a fantasy. You haven’t even met the man.”

“Rude…” You mumbled with a pout, though admitting defeat. 

Damn, so everyone thought your dating life was dry and depressing. Great. 

You knew they all meant well, acting like an overbearing family. And in the end, they just wanted you to be happy. 

“Y/N it’s time to head out.”

Standing up you took one last overview in the mirror before typing out a reply to the group chat.

Y/N: I'm off now! Love you!

You had completely forgotten how music shows worked. It had been three years since the group promoted for ‘ON’ in the midst of covid with countless of measurements. You hadn’t stepped foot on a show since, besides supporting your members for their recent promotions. 

It had also been more than a year since you’ve done any performances within Korea, having only just returned from your American solo promotions - so for you, everything felt more awkward than familiar despite your years of experience in the industry. 

You heard the cheers of the crowd just as you walked into the studio where the live recording was going on for another boygroup, the hard-hitting smooth beats making your head nod as you stopped in front of a screen to overlook the stage. 

Staff moved around you, securing a mic-pack before your sparkling microphone with a gradient purple to black found itself in your hand. The fans were screaming and chanting, and you found your attention caught without realizing it. 

You counted ten guys on the screen as they danced fiercely in commendable synchronization looking like one single unit as they moved. 

The Boyz was a familiar group to you, an old memory from an award show where they had asked BTS for a picture with shy grins and you had nearly cooed at their cuteness. Then again when Kingdom: Legendary War had aired you found yourself tuning in to watch every week. 

However, this was the first you’ve seen of the group since then - having been far too busy to keep up with all the groups on the regular, never mind every single song. 

You were enjoying the song currently playing, head nodding to the beat as you watched on. 

Not even you noticed how you had simply frozen at the next chorus, your attention wholly stolen for a mere couple of seconds. 

But it had been enough to change your entire world when the moment was recounted by your team in the future. 

“Hi, hello,

My name is what you want it to

숨겨 왔던

욕망들을 whisper.”

Huh. 

A sneeze suddenly forced itself out of you as you glared at the culprit, Aera smiling pointedly while holding a makeup brush that she had just tickled under your nostrils. 

“What was that for?” You grumbled, the room coming back into your attention. 

“My, my Y/N - is that a blush I see?” She teased as you scoffed, eyes flickering to the stage as the song came to an end. 

“You’re being ridiculous.” You dismissed her swiftly, ignoring the hum she gave and letting her touch up your already flawless makeup.

You were waiting patiently near the stairs, letting your management team take the last checks for your setup as people rushed around on stage to clean up and get it ready for your performance.  

The Boyz were making their way down and were impressively quick to notice you, though you blamed it on your bright white clothes in the darkness. You watched in patient amusement as some of their eyes widened, and even saw a member slapping the one in front of him with a muted gasp. 

You offered them a friendly grin as their flustered bodies caught up and everyone started bowing, their waists nearly snapping in half as you took half a step forward. 

“Please, take it easy.” You laughed lightly. “I loved your performance. The song is amazing.”

The obvious leader stepped forward, again bending at the waist but spoke with a sure and calm voice. “Thank you, Sunbaenim. It’s an honor.” 

The members were quick to follow with various choruses of thank yous, however, some had accepted your words and took it a bit easier with the bowing.  

“We love your album, sunbaenim. It’s been on repeat in the dorm since its release.” He continued to lead the conversation, the group of young men creating a half circle around you. 

“Oh thank you so much!” There was no hint of any pretense in your tone, you were always immensely grateful when people told you they loved your music. 

“You’re the leader, right? What’s your name?” 

“Yes, I am. I’m Sangyeon.”

“Ah right!” Your fingers snapped in excitement. “I remember you, of course. From the MMA’s…was it 2018?”

Some of their eyes widened in surprise to know that you remembered them. You relished in it honestly, always loving to prove people wrong about the public’s assumption of how worldwide fame and recognition had made BTS arrogant and seemingly unapproachable. 

“Y-yes, that’s correct, thank you for remembering us.” 

“I enjoyed watching you on Kingdom.” You admitted, noticing how they were starting to relax around you, smiling more easily and paying attention as if you were the president holding a speech. “You were one of my favorite groups throughout the whole second season.”

Again they started bowing and thanking you, luckily less aggressive than earlier. 

“Y/N-sshi, we are ready for you in five minutes. Please make your way to the stage, thank you.” A voice announced through the speakers as The Boyz started to bow again and ushered away as you offered brief goodbyes. 

But then you made the mistake of looking up, finding yourself locked in a trance of soft, plump lips, thick eyebrows, puppy dog eyes, and a slim angular face - your throat felt parched as your mouth parted, but no sound came out and you snapped it back shut embarrassed. 

Kim Sunwoo noticed the sudden strange behavior, as a single brow rose but he remained polite with a simple tug of his lips and a slight bow. 

His dark straight hair was parted in the middle, reminding you of the styles from 90’s boybands. You admired the way his slim t-shirt molded against his lean body with the leather pants and a thick silver chain around his neck. A chain he had pulled seductively while gliding across the floor and stared into the camera.

An image still swimming in your mind. 

An appraisal that you were quick to scold yourself over as you felt yourself blushing even hotter, eyes snapping away only hoping he didn’t notice your weird actions. 

Only to find yourself stumbling over your own feet in a moment of rare clumsiness. 

You managed to save yourself the embarrassment of falling to the ground, but only with Sunwoo’s quick thinking. Who had smoothly stepped close and held out a hovering arm just in case you were to fall, his other gently around your bicep to keep your balance. 

Fuck, you were making a whole fool out of yourself.

No one had noticed it, thank goodness. All too busy with their tasks to pay attention to the interaction.

“Are you okay?” Jesus, his voice was deep. “Sunbaenim?” He hastily added, seemingly remembering your status. 

“I-I’m okay.” You even stuttered now. Since when did you ever stutter. “Sorry, and thank you.”

“You should watch where you’re going.” He offered a half smile, those lips looking even more ridiculously plump and soft close as you stared up at him. “Careful not to get hurt.”

At this point, you were sure he noticed your flustered state as you cleared your throat and took a small step back out of his grip. 

“I should get going.” Was all you managed to say in your embarrassed state, swiftly stepping past him to walk up the stage but not before glancing back and noticing the amused pull of his features as he quietly chuckled to himself and followed his members out.

Aera made her sudden presence known as you flinched at her proximity, only to feel your stomach drop at the near-manic grin on her face. 

“Now that, is a crush, my dear.”

You wanted to curl up into a ball and scream your frustrations out from that whole interaction, but could only brace yourself with a smile as you were faced with the crowd who cheered as you came into view. 

Dozens of ARMY bombs waving helped settle the worry in your gut just for now. 

Nicely done, Y/N. Worldwide icon, indeed huh. 

You were still thinking about it as you exited the stage studio. 

So caught up in your lingering embarrassment and out-of-character behavior that even surprised yourself. 

Over what?! A pretty face? A voice that made your skin tingle just by the rasp of it?

“Fucking get a grip, Y/N…” You muttered, fingers massaging your temples as you returned to your dressing room. 

Only to walk straight into your next phase of what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-you. Quite literally too. 

Sunwoo let out a low ‘Whoa’ as you gasped and stumbled back to fully avoid running him down in your haste to hide yourself away until the nominations live broadcast. 

The toilet sign hung above his head as he maneuvered both of you to the side and away from the doors.  

“Oh my-” You were practically bumbling fool as your hands moved in silent explanation without many words to follow up, but he understood you well enough with a small, charming grin making his eyes crinkle and nose scrunch up just the slightest. 

“Hello, sunbaenim.” He gave a polite nod of his head. “It’s one of those days, huh?”

“Yeah…” You sighed in defeat, hardly trying to keep up that big and mighty senior artist image any longer. “I’m sorry it’s been taken out on you today.”

Sunwoo never lost his smile. “Don’t worry about it. It’s hardly the worst thing that happened to me at music shows.”

You nodded thankfully, very much aware that you were avoiding looking at him directly. Just for your own sanity, if you were being transparent. 

“You can stop that, by the way…” My god, were you shy, right now?

“Stop what?”

You cleared your throat. “Calling me sunbaenim all the time. I’m not very fond of the stiff formalities, so you can just relax around me.”

“Ah…” Even though you weren’t looking at him, you could feel his thinking. “Then… would noona be alright?” 

Your neck might as well have cracked with how quickly you snapped up to stare at him with widened eyes. Only to meet a knowing smirk gracing his dangerously, pretty face.

“N-noona?” You repeated almost stupidly.

“And here I thought my breath smelled or something. You wouldn’t even look at me.” The smirk widened.

Calming yourself in record time, you were composed enough to retort with a halfhearted glare. “You’re making fun of me, aren’t you?”

“You are making it very easy.” Kim Sunwoo was a straightforward man, you realized. “I suppose I would be too if caught checking someone out.” Well fuck. 

Your first step was denial. “I wasn’t-”

“Don’t feel embarrassed about it. I know I’m good-looking, noona. Just didn’t realize it was to the point of losing gravity.”

If you weren’t quick on catching onto dry humor, you might have thought him deadly serious with how flat he spoke those words. But you were well versed with this sort. Yoongi being a perfect example of it. 

The exaggerated push you delivered against his shoulder came from a place of familiarity with your own members, and Sunwoo didn’t seem to mind the casualness of it as his facade broke and he laughed. 

Giggling along, you shook your head. “You’re good.”

“I know.”

However, your smile fell at his sudden wince and how swiftly he managed to play it off within a second. But you were a quick study and noticed how subtly he rolled his neck. 

“Are you hurting somewhere?” You were blunt in your concern, this time surprising him. 

“Ah…” He was considering lying, you knew that. Having done it many times before yourself. But Sunwoo brushed the moment off.  “It’s just a bit of muscle stiffness in my neck and shoulders, nothing too serious. Don’t worry about it.”

You scrutinized him for a couple of seconds before accepting it. “If you say so. But I wouldn’t be dancing as hard as you did today with that kind of pain. Be a little mindful at least and ease back.”

Sunwoo was appreciative of your advice, accepting it with a gracious nod and another, quite frankly, heart-palpating smile directed at you. You could probably just stand here and admire him for several minutes in silence if it was offered to you, but you had an image to maintain after all.

An image that fell through the moment Kim Sunwoo was involved. 

“Getting lost in my beauty again, are you?” His teasing was never-ending, but instead of annoying you it only managed to pull your smile even wider. 

“You are ridiculous.” Was all you managed to say with a chuckle. 

He bit into his lower lip thoughtfully before deciding against whatever mental war he was having. “Ridiculous enough to ask for your number?”

There it was again. Your dry throat, and the way your heart probably skipped a beat. 

“You…want my number?”

“I mean, who doesn’t want a BTS member’s number.” Sunwoo shrugged, that stupid fitted t-shirt and chain catching your attention again. 

So you quirked a brow at him, knowing something else was coming. “And that’s your goal? A BTS member’s number?”

“That would be cool.” He was being awfully truthful until his eyes locked onto your own. “But I would love having the number of a beautiful woman more. Perhaps with a date on the side?”

Your surprise at his bold confession was hardly hidden, mouth parting as you blinked up at him expecting a joke to follow. 

This wasn’t exactly the first time you’ve been asked out by someone, but it has always been a bigger or older senior until BTS blew up to the point other idols found it too intimidating to approach anymore. It was a love-hate relationship for you in those circumstances. 

Yet Kim Sunwoo managed to cross those unwritten boundaries without fear of outside consequences, his gaze firmly locked on your own without notice of anything going on around you standing by the toilets in a public hallway. 

“Are you sure you would want to risk that?” Those words tasted bitter on your tongue when all you wanted to do was say yes. 

But you weren’t a fool. Anyone getting involved with BTS would always get a spotlight of any kind shone on them, wanted or not. And you made sure to warn them of it. 

Sunwoo was not shaken by it. Only quirking up a brow as if saying so what. 

Your heart thumped even harder. So you held out a hand and he wordlessly put his phone in it as the clicking of your manicured nails swiftly typed in your number. 

You watched as he typed in whatever name he chose to give you in his contacts and pocketed the device again.

“I’ll be waiting for that date.” You smiled with satisfaction to see the top of his ears turning red, brushing past him.

So you weren’t the only one affected at least.

UNKNOWN: What’s your favorite drink? Y/N: Who is this? UNKNOWN: I’m hurt, noona.  Y/N:  Ah Hello to you too, Sunwoo You changed Unknown’s name to Sunwoo. SUNWOO: Backtracking to the question. Y/N:  I’m a coffee addict SUNWOO: Ofc, the drink of life. Let me guess, iced americano? Y/N: I’m more of a sweet latte girl SUNWOO: A woman after my own heart. Y/N:  Alright you little flirt Care to explain? SUNWOO: I’m planning for our date ofc Y/N: Oh? Did I miss the location? SUNWOO: It’s a surprise Y/N: Should I be worried? SUNWOO: Why do you keep doubting me :(  Y/N: Acting cute won’t help you SUNWOO: heart emoji Y/N: But fine, better not disappoint me, Kim Sunwoo I got high standards after all ;) SUNWOO: I guess the pressure is on

“Hi.”

“...hey.”

Your soft giggle on the other side of the phone made Sunwoo smile without realizing it. 

“Why are you breathless?”

“Ah…” He kicked away a stray pair of pants on the floor before sitting down on his bed, making sure the door was closed. “I ran to my room when you called. We just got back from the schedules.”

“You could have just called me back.” There was rustling on your end, and looking at the time he assumed you were just getting into bed. 

“I didn’t wanna leave you hanging.”

“Hm, what a gentleman.”

“For you? Always.”

You giggled again. A sound Sunwoo was certain he was becoming obsessed with hearing. 

“I tried seeing you today.” 

“Yeah.” He lowered his voice just in case any of his members were to hear him. “Me too. It was quite hectic today, I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be. I know how it gets.”

“What did you do today?”

“Besides the music show? Just some interviews and a radio recording. I’m keeping my promotions at the bare minimum this time around.”

Stretching out on the bed, he couldn’t help but tease you. “Of course, the power of BTS.”

“Oh shush you.”

A silence settled between you. But it was a comfortable one, strangely enough. No awkward shuffling of clothes to have something to do, or the tense waiting for the other to speak. 

“I like this.” His voice was grating with how low he was trying to keep it. 

“...Like what?”

“This. Just talking to you, noona.”

Sunwoo could hear the smile in your voice. “I like this too. Very much so.”

It was hard to say how many hours the two of you spoke every night since that fateful day, but there were certainly no complaints on either end.

“This is fucking ridiculous.” Roughly peeling off the cropped denim jacket, you would feel guilty about how you threw it in the corner later. Aera would understand, hopefully. 

The stupid conflict between HYBE and MBC was no industry secret. But you managed to convince your company to give them another chance by letting you promote there this time after several years of avoiding the place. 

And did you regret it. 

“Do they think they can take me for a fucking idiot because I’m solo?” You seethed, whirling to stare at Yoo-Mi. She had a displeased expression as well, already tapping on her phone furiously as mutters of annoyance spread through the rest of your management team. 

You had been on a tense tirade the entire morning with the MBC production team and director about how you wanted your performance to be captured. They were obviously not used to how much creative freedom you were usually privy to and fought you the entire way, with passive-aggressive suggestions going against what you wanted. 

They only kept messing up, from your mic glitching on stage to the sound being off in your in-ear despite your several attempts to fix it during rehearsals. So the final product ended up being a complete mess in your own opinion, finding faults in every single frame in the live broadcast, your voice not being clear enough, and backtracking far too loud to convince viewers you were singing live despite having more than enough proof throughout the ten years. 

The haters would have a field day with that. 

“-a complete mess today, I’m telling you!” Your manager’s voice was going on in the background. 

“I can’t do this right now.” With a pointed look a Yoo-Mi, she nodded in understanding as you walked out of the dressing room towards wherever there were fewer people. 

You found a random hallway, fairly empty with an empty cushioned bench away from the main area of dressing rooms. Slumping down with your back resting against the cold wall, you closed your eyes with a tired groan. 

It was moments like these where you craved the support of your members. If this were Namjoon, he would not have relented in getting this perfect, Yoongi and Hobi right by his sides with their penetrating gazes to make sure. Jimin and Tae would be by you in their comfort, whereas Jin and JK would make extra sure that things weren’t spiraling out of control by being the compromisers in the middle. 

You weren’t a pushover, far from it. But you weren’t one for confrontations unless absolutely necessary. Today could have gone several ways with much better results if not for the underlying conflict between business companies. 

You don’t know if you dozed off or were simply in your own world. But the sudden cold, damp surface of something on your forehead made you flinch up as your eyes connected with the concerned ones of Sunwoo. 

He held an iced coffee in hand, the same one he was pressing against your skin as you allowed yourself to relax. 

“Are you okay?”

Standing up, you instead ignored the question and wrapped your smaller hand around his own still holding on to the cup. “Is this for me?”

He nodded, lips peeling back into a small smile as you accepted it. “A caramel macchiato latte, extra espresso shot.”

You had only mentioned your preferred drink once, but he had it memorized already.

“Thank you.”

Leaning with a shoulder against the wall, hand in a pocket - the concerned glint in his eyes never went away. Wearing a similar fit to the one when you first met him, Sunwoo was still as handsome as ever. Instead of a t-shirt, he wore a fitting turtleneck, a cropped blazer that made him seem even broader, and those damn leather pants with silver accessories adorned his hands, ears, and neck.  

His slightly bronzer skin compared to others seemed to glow. A feature of him you would never be sick of admiring. 

“Are you going to keep staring at me in silence?” Your lips quirked up before taking a sip from the drink, the taste of it getting your mood up. 

“Not if you say what’s bothering you.”

“What makes you think there is?”

Sunwoo snorts. “I walked passed you earlier and you didn’t even notice.”

Glancing at the coffee in your hand. “And you went to get me coffee?”

“I thought you needed something to cheer you up.”

So you gave in. “Just creative differences with the director here. My manager is taking care of it.”

Sunwoo hummed in understanding. “But are you okay?”

His brows were furrowed, those lips you could never ignore pulled into the slightest pout. Swallowing your nerves you stepped even closer. Sunwoo straightened up at the proximity but not moving away. He waited for you. 

“Can I hug you?” Your whisper practically melted him as everything about him softened. 

“Of course.”

Without hesitation, you put the cup down on the bench before snaking your arms around his slim waist, face tucked into the hollow of his neck and shoulder, and breathed him in. 

The aroma of ground coffee beans and subtle vanilla, all wrapped up in notes of sweet fruits and blended spices of sandalwood and sage; a scent you would forever associate with him from this moment.

Sunwoo’s arms wrapped around you, hand gently stroking your back as you relished in the comfort he was providing. A feeling you had missed immensely. 

You were falling, and there was nothing to stop you from being completely consumed by the orbit that was Kim Sunwoo.

Sunwoo was mesmerized. 

Quite frankly frozen to his spot in the dressing room, standing in the middle of the room, drink forgotten in hand as he stared at the screen where you were currently one of the last performers. 

Fair enough, he wasn’t exactly old, still young at the age of twenty-three, and being one of the youngest in his group he was often reminded of it. But he wasn’t ignorant. Especially not enough to ignore the fact he had fallen easily and quickly down the rabbit hole that was Y/N of BTS. 

Where everyone else saw the star quality encasing your every being, he managed to see past it. Your shyness that you often hid behind the pretense of a bold personality when faced with strangers. Sunwoo could see how you were struggling to be by yourself on stages where you used to be with seven others and had quite quickly used his presence as a comfort to chase your struggles away. 

And he had happily complied. It started with texting until he crossed that line by calling you one evening after a scheduled music show where neither had managed to talk, but craved to. 

After several of nights of calling each other, you surprised him one evening by turning on Facetime, sending his heart stuttering at the beautiful sight of you all barefaced in cozy pajamas under dim lighting as you settled yourself on a couch. 

Yet you still hadn’t found time to meet properly. The end-of-year season was always hectic with the amount of promotions and award shows that went on, especially for his group. Making that long-awaited date having to be put on pause. 

Sunwoo didn’t even expect you to attend after that fiasco of a recording earlier in the month until he woke up to a text this morning from you letting him know, with an unwritten hope to find some time to meet.

“Sunwoo’s in love.” A jest from one of his members snapped him out of the stupor as he simply rolled his eyes with a smirk, playing off the words even though they made him sweat. 

If only his members knew the truth. 

“She’s amazing.” Another compliment followed by several others as his members fell into a light discussion about you and your well-known ability to control a stage and make people pay attention by a single note of your voice. All that without the help of your members. 

Sunwoo felt like the clock was dragging by - his energy and hope diminishing with each minute while pretending he was okay around everyone. The award show was nearing its end, with you closing it before all performers would meet for the closing stage. 

He must have been one of the first members out the door when the call to gather was announced. His casual eagerness was enough to catch the curious attention of a few members, but he did the best he could to act his normal self. 

The stage was packed with the dozens of groups and performances that had joined for the event. Sunwoo made sure to stay close to his group, but he also couldn’t help the way his eyes kept searching for someone in particular. He had caught glimpses of you walking around the stage waving at fans, but also greeting artists who were eager to say hi. 

You were keeping close to your labelmates, TXT, laughing and smiling with them openly with an arm looped around Yeonjun’s like an older sister. Sunwoo would be lying if he didn’t feel jealous seeing you act so openly affectionate with them, but he reined in the green monster quickly. 

He barely managed to reign in his shock when squished amid the crowd as everyone tried to leave the stage and a familiar hand wrapped itself around his own with a quick squeeze before letting go again. Sunwoo saw your back as you walked away in front of him, still beside TXT. 

You never gave any indication it had happened besides the barest of glances over your shoulder. 

The next time Sunwoo managed to see you was by being dragged quite forcefully into a cleaning supply closet as the door closed behind him with a thump and lock turning.

He huffed out a laugh as you stood before him, a guilty grin painted on your lips. 

“Was that a bit too rough?”

“It was perfect.” Sunwoo continued to chuckle and finally took you in. 

The two of you were matching in black, his an assemble of leather and silver accents, whereas you were all sparkling sheer fabric with thigh-high stilettos and matching mini skirt. Jesus fuck. 

 His throat bobbed as his male mind caught up to what was happening: standing in a small-sized closet in dim lighting, with you only inches away from him dressed like actual sin. 

“Do you think they’ll notice?” You asked worried, gnawing on your lower lip. His gaze zeroed on the action. 

“My members definitely have, but they’ll think I probably ran off to the bathroom.”

“We won’t have long then.” The downturned vision of glossy lips made him lick his own, in anticipation or nerves, Sunwoo wasn’t sure. 

He could hear and feel everything now. The sound of your breaths, the rising of your chest, and the heat of your skin only a fingertip away from his touch. You must have caught on to the same desire because you finally looked at him - as in thoroughly looking, doing an appraisal of him from head to toe with a sly tilt to your head, eyes lingering on the cropped fabric of his shirt - lips pulling up into a smile. 

Someone was clearly not feeling shy anymore. He didn’t know if it was a good thing for him. 

“-can I kiss you, noona?” Sunwoo cut off any words you wanted to say. And you didn’t seem all that surprised. “I need to kiss you. actually.”

“Need to, huh?” You were clearly very amused by his words. “Then who am I to stop you?” 

Oh yeah. Definitely a dangerous turn for his sanity. 

“You’re such a tease.” Sunwoo couldn’t help but mutter as he hauled you against him firmly, cutting off your giggle with his lips which turned into a pleased sigh.

Your arms reached up to wrap around his neck, pressed up against each other down to your hips as you raked your nails through his scalp causing a shudder and a groan to leave him. 

Sunwoo kissed you enthusiastically but slowly, seemingly on a mission to memorize every single crevice in your mouth, those plumb lips feeling even softer on your own. He turned your bodies around, never separating from your mouth when he suddenly bent only to pick you up. 

You squeaked in surprise, pulling back momentarily only to be pushed even firmer against the door, your legs spreading to accommodate him between your thighs, your skirt scrunching up. 

That all melted away as you let out a soft moan as Sunwoo finally sucked on your tongue, humming against you with a smirk tugging in the corner of his mouth. He moved away, to the corner of your lips, behind your ear, and down to your neck - wet kisses and his tongue making you pant as your thighs squeezed around his hips. 

Your fingers that were already in his hair tightened their grip even further, holding him against you where he was kissing your neck with a breathless whine and Sunwoo only chuckled at your reaction. 

Honestly, you hadn’t expected him to pick you up just like that. But no part of you was certainly complaining by the turn of events. 

He was more than ready to go further, you noticed. And to be fair, so were you. So strung up with your nerves desperate to find release in any kind that you could have fucked him right in this closet. If it weren’t for the time and place. 

Manvouring Sunwoo’s face back up, you only got a glimpse of his flushed appearance, lidded eyes, and swollen lips before you kissed him again. This time much slower, trying your damn best to calm both of you down. 

Your feet found the ground again, Sunwoo leaning in over you with both hands cupping the back of your neck almost too gently, but a hold that you couldn’t help but rest into. 

It was a struggle to separate, he found out. Pulling back but always needing to dip back in for another kiss or peck. He did it so many times that you ended up laughing. 

“Fuck, I can’t seem to let you go,” Sunwoo murmured, thumb caressing your cheek softly as your eyes sparkled up at him. 

“It’s not the last time.” You assured him, leaning in to press your lips against his neck for a little teasing touch as you smirked in satisfaction feeling him shudder before nuzzling close. 

“I know…” He sighed heavily, obviously not wanting to leave, but the clock was ticking. And the more time they spent lost in each other’s arms would make everyone else around them more suspicious. 

So with a heavy heart and frankly, half a boner - Sunwoo pushed himself away so you could open the door. He took the lead, peeling it open slowly and looking both ways to see it was surprisingly sparse with only a couple of staff on the other end. 

You held onto his hand from behind him, sneaking out slowly as the door clicked shut. From there both of you rushed to where your dressing rooms were - you only being a few doors down from him. 

Just as the sign of The Boyz were in view, Yoo-Mi, your manager came out of your door and freezing both to the spot. 

Sunwoo cursed, body tensing beside you, but he was assured quickly to see the almost entertained smirk on the older woman’s face as she waltzed in their direction. 

“Unnie.” You greeted her sheepishly, never letting go of his hand. You actually moved closer as Sunwoo bowed in greeting. 

“Not a crush, huh?” That was all Yoo-Mi said before shaking her head and moving on. “I’m going toilet, be quick, we’re leaving soon.”

Then they were alone again. Slowly glancing at each other, Sunwoo bit down on his lip before snorting out a laugh with you following with a low laugh. 

“That went well.” He grinned. 

“We really have to go now,” You gave a pointed look at their intertwined hands. 

“Yeah…” His grin didn’t fall as his large hands gently gripped your hips and pulled you closer. You hardly had the power to resist him. “Goodbye kiss?”

“You will be the death of me, Kim Sunwoo.”

Sunwoo leaned down with a mischievous tilt to his mouth, lips brushing against yours as he spoke. “But you would love that, noona.”

Leaning up you sealed the kiss softly, hands resting on his chest only to flinch apart the very next second. 

“Yah Kim Sunw-!”

Q or Changmin stood in the open doorway with his mouth dropped open, only for the two of them to realize they had placed themselves directly in front of The Boyz’ dressing room.

Giving a complete view of both of them to everyone inside as heavy silence fell. 

Well. There went the secrecy.

“What…the hell?” 

Simultaneously taking in the jaw-dropped expressions of his members. You and Sunwoo couldn’t hold back your nearly manic cackles as you fell into him for support.

“Am I dreaming?” Someone wondered out loud in English. 

If this was a dream, then you would never want to wake up. 

Thank you for reading!

masterlist

[gracieheartspedro]

I Can See You

fem!reader x dbf!joel miller

Hi friends! It's been awhile (:

I am back to writing! This time, I'm planning on having many parts to this story. It's a DBF Joel Miller story, which I love to read, which means I had to write it, right?

I wrote this with no Y/N, instead each character gives her a nickname/pet name.

So here's Part 1, I really hope you enjoy!

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: DBF! Joel, age gap-ish (reader is 25, Joel is 39), eventual smut, joel being a little bit of a perv, reader not having a filter, alcohol consumption

“Mornin’,” His Southern accent was even deeper than usual. My head peaks up from behind my computer, noticing his very tired eyes. The bags under his eyes still somehow did him justice. 

“Mornin’ Joel,” I mutter before taking a sip of my coffee. I watch as he finds his way towards my bosses office. He was only my boss at work, but at home he was just Dad. 

I watch his ass move in his jeans, shamelessly. 

Finding your coworker hot is one thing, it’s another when it’s also your dad’s friend and he was about 20 years older than you. 

I’ve thought Joel Miller was quite the looker since I was about 18. I had just started working for my dad. I was mainly just scheduling and doing work orders. Joel took me out to a work site one day, on my father’s request. He wanted me to get know some of the people who would be scheduling work from us. I got to sit around with the property manager of an apartment complex in a tight black dress in the dead of summer, watching guys replace windows. While outside that day, Joel worked alongside some of the laborers, his tanned skin and shaggy dark hair glistening with sweat. Something about him doing manual labor turned me on. Something awoke in me that day, and ever since then, I thirst over him in silence. 

I catch myself looking a bit too long, quickly averting my eyes to my computer screen. I act like I am typing something, glancing over to Joel and my dad walking out of his office together. They are discussing another project that Joel was overseeing that would keep him very busy in the upcoming months. 

“My girl here will be starting back at college in the fall, so she will only be part time for awhile,” My dad says, drawing attention to me. 

“Oh really, where ya going?” 

I blank out completely for a moment.

“UT Austin,” I finally answer.

“Smart girl, you living on campus?”

“Nope, just getting my master’s in Engineering so living from home makes the most sense.”

Joel shakes his head, “Master’s. Didn’t you just graduate high school?”

“I’m 25, Joel.”

His eyes scan me for a moment, realizing I’m much older than he remembers. 

“Ha,” He grumbles, “Time flies huh, Steve?”

“Sure does, you just wait for that Sarah of yours is off to college,” My dad laughs, slapping Joel’s shoulder. I wince, realizing again he has a young daughter. It wasn’t ideal, to say the least. 

“We got about 5 years on that,” Joel says, his eyes returning to mine, “Well it’ll be nice havin’ you around during our busy season.”

“Happy to help,” I reply, not really meaning it. 

“Hey, Joel, you and Sarah making an appearance at our BBQ this weekend? We invited the whole neighborhood and I can’t remember if you told me you’d be there.”

His eyes are still on me, “Yeah, I’ll be there,” his eyes return to my dad’s, “Just me and Tommy though, Sarah is goin’ over to a friend’s house.”

“Can’t wait!” My dad cheers, “Baby girl, can you make sure my schedule is cleared Friday evening so I don’t have to worry about when I can get the meat?”

“Of course, dad,” I grit my teeth, “I’m on it.”

-

“Hey baby girl, can you go grab me some extra plates?” 

My dad was over the top with his BBQs to say the very least. The whole neighborhood was in on it. Steaks, burgers, hot dogs, chicken, the whole thing. I spent all morning getting the huge backyard and cabana ready for all our visitors. We usually had someone come over to do all the setting up, but Dad made sure to remind me that I was living rent free and being paid on his payroll, so setting up was the least I could do. 

People littered the pool and backyard. I weave between people, giving smiles and welcomes where I could.

I walk in to the kitchen, the cold AC air hitting my bare arms. Luckily, I was wearing shorts over my bikini shorts, or else the goose bumps would be up and down my legs, too. I begin searching the cabinets for the large serving plates you always used for big gatherings. Leaning down, my triangle bikini top almost lets my boobs loose. I sit up straight, messing with the knots on my back. I knew tightening it could only help so much.

“Need help?” I almost jump out of my skin. I turn quickly, spotting Joel Miller standing in the kitchen with me.

“Shit, you fucking scared me,” I breathe loudly, patting my chest to make my heart stop racing, “I think I can get it.”

“Mhm,” He sticks a tooth pick between his teeth, “Lemme help, girl.”

God he was so fine. I hated myself for having a crush on him. But the domestic and simple gray t-shirt that hugged his arms so well and the blue jeans? I simply could not resist staring. 

No chance in hell. But I got to look at him every day and imagine it. 

I turn on my heels, holding the ties out to him so he could tie them. 

“I need them tighter,” I mutter, “Don’t want these puppies falling out in front of the Adlers.”

“Don’t want to excite Mr. Adler too much, he may have himself a heart attack.”

I smile to myself, biting my lip. He ties it, his fingers grazing my bare back slightly. 

“All good now, girl,” I turn to face him, looking up at him through my eyelashes, “Now what were you lookin’ for?”

“Serving plates,” I explain, “Dad is finishing up those steaks, needs more space.”

“Well let’s get ‘em and head out to all the fun,” He says, ducking down to the cabinet I was looking in originally. He finds them, handing them up to me. He looks so good looking up at me from this angle. 

“You want to grab us some beers,” I suggest, “I’ll meet you out there?”

“Your dad runnin’ low?”

“Probably, so grab three.”

–

“So, you going to be here all summer?”

I had no interest in talking to Tommy, but he was keeping me from toeing the line with Joel in my drunken state, so here I am. I sit in my lounger chair, wanting so bad to take off my jean shorts. I knew if I did, Tommy would take it as I’m making a pass, so I sweat extra. 

“I’m starting college in August, so yeah I’ll be around the office and staying home.”

He smiles, “Good to hear, love seeing you around.”

I smile back faking a cheery laugh, “Thanks, Tommy… care to grab me another beer?”

“No problem, sweetheart.”

I watch him walk away before searching the crowd for Joel. I spot him across the yard, talking to one of the newer neighbors. A single mom who moved in two months ago. My dad kept joking the other night that he’d be making her my stepmom, which only made me gag. She was beautiful, younger than my dad, but just about Joel’s age. 

A pang of jealousy rises within me. 

Joel finally catches my wandering eyes. He smiles gently, giving me a nod.

“Here, darling,” Tommy says sweetly, “Need anything else?”

“Yeah, actually,” Your brother, “Can you help me with something?”

“Sure, ‘s up?”

I sit up, leaning over making my boobs hang right in his eye line. 

If I couldn’t keep one Miller’s attention, maybe I could snag second best. My beer filled brain thinks about how they are cut from the same cloth, so they both are probably good at this. 

“Do you want to help me change a lightbulb?”

He raises his eyebrows, “I guess, where at?”

I smirk, “My bedroom.”

We sneak away, my eyes scanning the area. It didn’t appear as anyone was following us. My room was the last room on the left upstairs, so the anticipation as I guided him down the hallway was killing me.

Ever since Joel grazed my back earlier, I’ve been ready. So fucking ready. 

“Are we actually changing a lightbulb?”

I open my door for him, gesturing to him to follow me in.

In the dim light, Tommy was very cute. He was a sweet guy and I knew he’d be the first to jump on my idea. 

“You tell me,” I say, starting to untie the knot Joel tied. In my moment of trying to be sexy, I realize Joel tied the stupidest and hardest knot ever. Tommy notices my struggle, reaching around me, frantically trying to get the top off.

As it gets loose, I reach up to grab his neck.

“What the fuck is going on ‘ere?” 

His voice freezes me. Tommy looks towards the door in horror.

“Joel-“

“Tommy, you fucking know better,” His voice is so intimidating and scary, I cant even muster the courage to turn around, “Git.”

Tommy gives me eyes saying I’m so sorry, and I just stare blankly at my wall. I hear Tommy’s foot steps run down the stairs. I realize how drunk I am because my wall paper begins to move on it’s own. It doesn’t usually do that. 

“Now you,” His stride towards me is quick, “I’m not your Dad, but don’t think he’d like you fucking his employees.”

Maybe it was the liquid courage, “Who said I was trying to fuck him?”

I snap my head towards his stern and impossible to read face.

“Bullshit,” He spits, “He got through my knot, he assumed somethin’ was about to happen.”

“Well, even if that’s where it went, why are you putting your nose in our business?”

He chuckles darkly, “So now it’s ours, huh? I have you know, girl, Tommy’s business is my business. And you’re just makin’ my job hard.”

I tiptoe closer to him, “And what’s your job, again, Mr. Miller?”

“Make sure people are behavin’ themselves.”

I realize what he’s doing. My tipsy mind took a second to search his face for more, but I can't read him at all. 

“I’m behaving, Mr. Miller. I promise,” I reach up, touching his jaw, “No more funny business.”

It was the closest I had ever got to him. I felt a rush just touching him.

“Good, get your top back on and come down to the party. Your dad is looking for you.”

I look down at myself as he leaves the room. My fucking tits are out, and he didn’t even look down.

The game he was playing was not the same one I was playing.

–

The next morning, I have a pounding headache and no drive to leave my room. I was embarrassed and horrified. I knew I would have to face Joel and Tommy on Monday morning, so I had to make amends beforehand. I really didn’t want them to tell my dad and I was pretty out of line for trying to fuck Tommy when Joel wasn't giving me the attention my drunk ass thought I deserved.

After spending hours in bed, rolling back and forth thinking of a script to say, I figured that honesty is the best policy. 

Well, honesty with a little bend in the truth. 

I get showered and dressed. My usual summer time outfit was a crop top and short shorts, but today I needed to be more… conservative. 

I find a nice summery dress, that went to midthigh. It was yellow, not a lot cleavage, floral. Innocent. 

When I get downstairs, my dad sits in the living room, his feet propped up watching the news. 

“Where ya going, baby girl?” 

“I’m going for a walk,” I lie. 

“Wearing that?”

“Yes,” I nod quickly, “Do you need anything while I’m out?”

He shakes his head, “No, have fun, I guess.”

I could tell he was suspicious, but he wasn’t one to pester me too much. He had high expectations for me, but I always exceeded them. He never questioned me too much, unless it was about school. He didn’t even really care about my love life. He always got excited when I told him I was going on dates in college. I mean, I rather him be excited than bother me about the guys I was seeing.

I start my journey to Joel’s. I didn’t even know if he was home or not, I was going on blind faith.

It was hot as shit and I was not fully prepared to walk to his house in a dress and sandals. 

I could’ve just driven there and back. But no, I decided to roast in the hot summer sun.

–

When I arrive to his house, I just kind of stand in his driveway, catching my breath. He was home, his truck was here. 

I walk to the front door, knocking first then ringing the door bell. 

It takes about minute, but he gets the door. 

And he’s shirtless. 

It was the worst and best moment of my entire life. 

“What are you doing here?”

And it’s not quite the response I was anticipating when I arrived at his door. 

“I uh-,” I hear some stirring inside the house, which causes me to peak my head past Joel’s shoulder. 

I see movement, but my eyes find Joel’s again before I could focus in on it. He pushes me back a bit, coming outside and shutting the door behind him. 

“I came to apologize, but you seem busy.”

He shakes his head, “Not busy, just woke up.”

“With someone?”

What the fuck? Why can’t I shut my mouth?

“Pardon me?”

“Well I walked this whole way to apologize about my inappropriate behavior yesterday,” I explain, “But yeah, that’s it.”

The door creaks open and I am wholeheartedly anticipating a hot MILF or something. But instead, it’s a little girl. 

“Sarah, get inside!”

“Oh hi, I know you!”

I smile at the girl. She was cute, I had to admit. She looked a bit like Joel, mainly the smile. A smile I wasn’t too familiar with, because he wasn’t too keen on my jokes. Ever.

“Yeah, I work with your dad,” I explain, “Nice to see you, Sarah.”

“You too, do you want to have lunch with us?”

“Sarah she can’t st-” 

“I’d love to, only if your dad says it’s okay.”

He got himself in a pickle, but I was aching to have a conversation that didn’t involve me putting my foot in my mouth like I almost did again. Plus, some food and water would help the heatstroke I felt coming on.

He stares at me, almost like he wished I’d disappear, “Of course, come in. Sarah is making sandwiches.”

“I hope you like turkey and cheese!”

—

“Thanks for the sandwich, Sarah,” I say, wiping my face making sure I didn’t have mustard left over.

She smiles with her mouth full, “You’re welcome!”

“Hey Sarah, why don’t you go get ready for swim practice,” He suggests, “Me and your new best friend need to have an adult conversation.”

She looks up at him annoyed, “I guess, but don’t scare her away. She has a cool pool I want to swim in.”

I laugh out loud, “Yeah, don’t scare me away, Joel.”

He doesn’t laugh, he just looks at me with his lazer eyes. I just wish Sarah a farewell and shut my mouth, waiting for the storm. He stirs, eating another bite of his sandwich. 

“So you came to apologize, huh?”

I swallow, “Uh, yeah. I’m sorry for my inappropriate behavior. I had one too many yesterday.”

He nods, “Yeah you were practically falling out of that top of yours before you took Tommy upstairs. Surprised you didn’t have it off before then.”

My eyes widen, “Well that’s humiliating.”

“Don’t think anyone was particularly mad about it,” He says, “Maybe one of those neighborhood watch moms, but who cares about ‘em?”

I can’t help but smirk. Was he insinuating that he wasn’t mad about almost seeing my boobs?

“Yeah, they always give me the most disgusted looks when I’m out jogging.”

“Cause’ they miss bein’ young and beautiful,” He explains, “All their husbands stare, too.”

I can’t believe he’s talking to me like this, I find myself leaning in a bit to try to talk quieter. It seems like this is conversation we should be whispering to each other.

“Do you stare?”

Foot. In. Mouth. 

He smirks, giggling a bit. I finally got to see him smile.

“Of course, I do.”

----

Hehehehe tell me what you think! I'll be back with part 2 soon!

[marajaak]

Mine

(Sanji x reader)

Title : Mine

Pairing : Sanji x female reader

Warnings : Smut, unprotected sex (please don’t do that), creampie, Zoro is an asshole in this fanfic, English isn’t my first language so please be kind

Genre : smut

Summary : Y/N feels unrequited love towards Zoro. Sanji will do everything to help her forget the swordsman. What if it was the beginning of a love story ?

The young woman sighed when Zoro walked past her without looking. She stared at him sadly as he got off the Sunny and headed to the island.

- Y/N, are you coming? Luffy said with a big smile.

- I... no, she muttered. I think I'll stay with Sanji to guard the boat.

- Ok, see you later!

(Y/N) took a few steps on the ship and went to sit in a corner. The sun shone in a cloudless sky. It was a pleasant temperature, ideal for exploring a new island. But the young woman was not in the mood for that. She was thinking of a handsome young man with green hair. To the sweat that dripped down his bare chest when he worked out. To the kiss they had exchanged during a party where the swordsman was a little drunk. And finally the way he had ignored her moments ago.

Tears blurred her vision, and she buried her face in her arms, sobbing. Why didn't Zoro like him? Was she not pretty enough? Not strong enough? What did she have to do to get his attention?

Suddenly, she felt someone gently wiping away her tears .

- Shhh, it's going to be okay, whispered a soft male voice.

(Y/N) raised her head and met Sanji's tender and compassionate gaze.

- I... I..., she stammered.

He put an arm behind her back to help her up.

- Come, you're going to tell me what's making you sad and we'll find a solution, he whispered.

The cook took her to her room and sat down on her bed next to her. The naked thigh of the young woman brushed against the blond’s.

- It's this Marimo, isn't it? he began, lighting a cigarette.

- That's it, replied (Y/N) wiping her tears. I think I have feelings for him. We kissed several times and we even... uh...

- You slept together, Sanji completed.

- Yes one time. I thought he had feelings for me, but he's been ignoring me since the last night we partied. I know he was drunk, but still...

The blond placed both hands on the young woman's cheeks and turned her face towards his.

- Y/N, excuse me for telling you this, but I'm afraid that this kelp face doesn't want your heart, but only your body.

She watched the wisps of smoke billowing from her friend's cigarette to form diaphanous figures in the air. She had had a crush on him when she joined the crew, but since he flirted with a lot of women, she figured she didn't have a chance. She then became interested in Zoro. But something in the cook's eyes told him that... maybe...

She moved forward slightly and briefly placed her lips on the blond's, before pulling away when she saw him display a shocked expression.

- Sorry, I... I don't know what happened to me. I just wanted to forget about him for a while...

Sanji smirked.

- I was just surprised. If it's good sex you want, I'm always available...

He leaned towards her but she pushed him away, shaking her head.

- That's not what I meant. I am a romantic person. It's not just Zoro who occupies my heart. There... there's also you. I just wanted to know if you felt the same...

- Oh, said Sanji.

His gaze softens.

- I always loved you, but I thought you only had eyes for Marimo...

- Well, we both went astray...

She was cut off by the blonde's hot lips. He ran his hand through her hair, pressing lightly on her head to deepen the kiss. (Y/N) put his arms around the cook's neck.

Moments later, she found herself lying on her bed, with the young man kissing the soft skin of her neck. The young woman moaned softly.

- Zoro never had that effect on you, did he? he questioned her.

She shook her head again and he smiled.

Slowly, he moved down her body, caressing her curves, tracing a wet line with his tongue. He stopped in front of her crotch, his eyes bright with desire, waiting for permission.

“Go ahead, Sanji,” she whispered.

The young man lifted her skirt and took off her panties. With delicate licks, he explored every part of her intimacy. (Y/N)'s legs were shaking with pleasure, so he grabbed them. The electricity and shivers coursing through her body became euphoric, and she came abruptly. Sanji continued to lick her through her orgasm.

- Do you like it Y/N? This seaweed face has never done that to you?

- No, never... It's so good...

She stood up. A rather large dent deformed the cook's pants.

- Let me take care of you now, Sanji, she said.

- No, not today, ma chérie.

He helped her lie down again.

- What you need now is comfort.

The young woman's big smile made him understand that she would do whatever he wanted. But what he wanted was for her to let things happen.

He unzipped her skirt and took off her blouse, placing it carefully on a chair next to him. Then he began to take off his clothes. First his tie, then his jacket, his shirt, his pants and finally his boxers.

He gently entered the young woman's intimacy, letting out a long sigh, giving her time to adjust to his length. (Y/N) moaned. The cook wasn't as big as Zoro, but he was longer, and his cock stretched the walls of her vagina deliciously.

Little by little, he began his thrusts while caressing his beloved's body. He slipped his fingers through her hair, then swelled into her chest, without stopping to kiss her.

-Sss... Sanji! Y/N gasped.

- That's it, shout my name, the blond whispered in his ear. If you said mine and Marimo's in the same breath, you would realize that they don’t taste the same.

- Yes... but... don't talk about him anymore... I only want you right now...

- You're right... You are mine, mine, mine...

His trusts became more erratic, more disordered. (Y/N), drunk with pleasure, gripped the sheets. The happiness she felt was almost insurmountable. The softness of the blonde's touch and the love she felt in his movements drove her crazy. The swordsman had never treated her like this. He had just put her on all fours and fucked her up without thinking about her pleasure. Suddenly, she felt Sanji come inside her, which made her cum too. Her eyes rolled at the back of her head.

He rested his head on the young woman's chest and (Y/N) stroked his hair while catching her breath.

- It was good, she breathed. Much better than with Zoro...

The cook quickly raised his head, a predatory smile on his face.

- What if I made you forget that name forever?

[sophiamarieispinkbunny-chan]

Something bothers me about Fiona/Nightfall…

Okay so in my first chair analysis post, someone reblogged it saying that Fiona/Nightfall might hate Twilight and turn on him as he and Yor get close with each other  and I can actually see it happening. Right now, it’s still less likely but it’s not impossible for her to turn rogue and here’s how the manga suggests it.

She’s the one who usually let’s her emotions guide her despite appearing emotionless, like how she almost endangered Operation Strix through visiting Twilight's home without any consent from her superiors, causing for Yor to doubt her marriage with Loid.

Sylvia, her Handler, told her not to do anything but she ignores it...

She even broke that policy among fellow agents by making an unnecessary contact with Twilight...

And in this chapter, Twilight's statement suggests that Fiona/Nightfall seems to also have a problem losing her cool, letting her emotions control her and that often gets the way in her missions.

In everything she does, what motivates her is the hope to gain Twilight’s affection.

When she does something, it wasn’t because she genuinely cares for peace and other people's sake herself. She just strives for peace because it’s what Twilight wanted. It's mostly displayed in the recent mole arc chapters.

This isn't really that necessary but it's just cringey and uncomfy to me how she says Twilight is like her little toy knife, when Twilight was never hers. I really don't like this part of her personality when she thinks she knows everything about Twilight when she knows nothing about the real him, the past him and the man he's slowly becoming.

So moving on, when it finally dawns on her that she will not ever have Twilight's affection, I don’t know what she could do.

I mean it is hinted when she’s first introduced that she’s the one who’s most likely to betray someone in the agency and it might be a judgmental comment from a hateful coworker but knowing how the plot is moving right now, I know Endo could be throwing subtle details that could mean more in the future. And who knows, she might’ve done it before. When?

Let’s go back to the exchange of Twilight and Franky during Chapter 2 when Loid is finding someone suitable to be his fake wife.

Twilight stated that most of the female operatives in their agency were wiped out during the recent spy sweeps. Female agents we're the one who are mostly wiped out and Franky mentions someone must've ratted them out to the SS.

I think, this might be a wild and far fetched theory but it's not impossible, Fiona/Nightfall was the one who ratted those female agents. Why? She might have received the information for Operation Strix, considering that all Wise agents seems to know about the Operation. She probably eliminated all female agents that might've suited to be Twilight's fake wife.

Cause if you think about, it is really practical for Wise to have the wife be a spy too, it would be really convenient for the mission. However, the candidates they think are capable of being an ideal wife and mother just get outed like that in the SS and this spy sweep just happened to be when Twilight is looking for a wife.

Nightfall might've thought, finally, she could fulfill her utmost desire to be Twilight's wife. Yet Wise has a different idea. Even if she's the only female agent left, she still isn't suitable for the role and I think Handler purposely didn't pick her knowing she has feelings for Twilight and her emotion might get the best of her, thus could compromise the mission. Handler, as a former wife and mother herself, could also think Nightfall can't do the job of a wife and especially of a mother properly. So I have this hunch that Handler purposely gave her another mission at that time so she can't complain about not being picked as Twilight's wife for Operation Strix.

Yes, Nightfall might be on the good side now because she’s helping to maintain peace and she's protecting Twilight. But her main intention why she’s doing this is so subjective and dependent that I think it would really affect her judgment in the future when she realizes reality is different from her fantasies.

[norrisreads]

kiss me kiss me #CS55

PAIRING: carlos sainz x reader, mercedes staff!, platonic friendships with most of the drivers

SUMMARY: everyone has a crush on carlos sainz, everyone including you

WARNINGS: fluff fluff FLUUFF!!!!!!!

FACECLAIM: jennierubyjane on ig

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

Daydreaming and people watching was something you’ll caught yourself doing mostly. At times, working in the motorsport industry, you’ll find yourself being busy but yet so free and here you are just staring into the space while sitting on the sidelines of the mercedes paddock club.

Until you felt someone sitting next to you, “Just to let you know, taking a picture helps, the staring is a little intense, y/n”

you recognised the voice of a specific Williams racings driver.

“what are you talking about, i’m just people watching as always albon. Where’s lily?” you shrugged your shoulders

“lily’s coming in a while, no but i am serious y/n, pipe down on the staring at the ferrari’s. George and I have been on a look out for you, you’ve been out here for at least an hour”

Honestly, you didn’t know it has been an hour until Alex told you off.

To tell the truth, you had a little crush on the driver from ferrari, specifically carlos sainz. Everything about him, just happens to be your exact ideal type. The only interaction you had with him was during the after party where he offered a drink & that’s probably when you started gaining feelings for the said driver.

“he’s so pretty and i am just this” you told alex.

“you could get it you know, there is alot of the engineers and staffs who are interested in you, especially because you’re always living up the moments, they’re just scared of toto”

Susie and you were close, ever-since you’ve decided to work under Mercedes since the age of 20th, which you’re currently on the second year right now. Susie and Toto tends to favour you especially when you were one of the youngest working under Mercedes amg, being close to the both of them practically means getting invited to family dinners, team dinners and more.

Other than Toto and Susie, you were also close to George and Lewis, and being close to George means you’re close to the Williams driver Alex Albon too. You were friends with the other drivers too, but aren’t quite close which resulted in your current situation.

staring at carlos sainz. “you know he’s freshly single?”

George came and joined the conversation between you and Albon. He then passed you a pair of tinted shades, “put some shades on, think it’s getting a-bit too obvious”

the comment by george made the both brits laughed, while you rolled your eyes to express your annoyance by their presence.

“being freshly single, does not mean i will give it a try, george. We have a 6 year difference, you know how i am with age gaps”

“if you’re gonna pull the age gap card, i’m going to pull myself out of this conversation, lily and i literally have a 3 years gap”

“no shit Alex, multiply that by two and it’ll be mine and the ferrari driver”

“To make you feel better, y/n. Think about Pierre’s and kika’s, theirs are way worse than you and him” george speaks out

“let’s move on, this is just us 3 being delusional”

“yeah you’re the delusional one, we’re just manifesting that you’ll have him sooner or later” Alex shrugged his shoulder and went back to the Williams paddock.

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

Qualifying for the spain grand prix has just ended, you were just walking around the paddock clubs area, instead of being at mercedes, you’ve decided to explore a little. Susie had suggested for you to have a quick walkabout knowing your job tasks was done earlier in the day, and you were just waiting for the drivers to be back on the mercedes building.

Fully focusing on the application opened on your mobile phone, you weren’t really well aware of your surroundings until you bumped in-to a certain someone.

shit, “lamento lo ocurrido, oh..?”

the universe has decided to aligned with you today, because right now you could feel the bpm of your heart rate increasing to more than 100.

“oh y/n right? i didn’t know you can speak spanish” carlos was holding on to your shoulders to balance you from the impact of the bump the both of you had.

“no, no. I meant yeah, i’m y/n, what i am saying is no i can’t speak spanish, those words were kinda taught to me by google, just for this weekend” you nervously stuttered and laugh

“that’s a cute effort to learn, where are you headed to right now? it’s a-bit crowded ain’t it?” carlos continuing the conversation

did mother earth suddenly decides to love me today?

“yeah cute effort i guess, oh just walking around trying to familiarise myself with this surrounding for tomorrow’s race! yeah it’s way crowded rather than yesterday! congrats on p2 for qualifying by the way!”

having a conversation with him feels utterly weird yet you’re thankful for this situation to happened, because whew this man couldn’t be anymore finer than a greek god.

“Gracias, lindura! See you later, perhaps? George’s on his way, by the look of it I think he’s finding for you love, it was nice talking to you” carlos smiled and waved at you, walking alongside Lando Norris.

dings

three little pigs

russell: what the fuck was that? were the two of you talking?

albon: what’s going on

what does, lindura means? cutie????: y/n

albon: did he called you that????????

albon: ANSWER ME!

russell: they bumped into each other, they had a 5 mins conversation, in that 5 minutes she told me her heart rate bpm increased to 110 (she thinks) he also held her

albon: why are you answering me

russell: i’m telling you the details that she’s telling me right now, appreciate it you idiot

guys i think i’m in love, Spanish accent is so sexy to wake up to everyday, six years is nothing to me : y/n

albon: i could simply ask charles for carlos contact y/n, let me do it please 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

russell: she just smacked my shoulders

“this is crazy george, that’s like my second time talking to him”

you paused your walk and turned yourself to face george

“hey guys” a thick french accent.

“oh charles, what a great timing” george pulled charles to the side and into our conversation

“hi charles”

“what’s this about? not in the Mercedes sidelines today staring into our building, y/n?” charles laughed which made my eyes turned wide

“what the fuck charles, YOU NOTICED? it was just one time, i swear.” i hid my face with my hands

“if it wasn’t for george’s tinted glasses, carlos would have caught you, good thing carlos is oblivious to everything” charles snickered yet finding the whole staring interaction adorable knowing from george about your tiny little (not tiny and little) crush towards Carlos.

“fucking embarrassing, this is my last appearance here. Im quitting this job” you rolled your eyes jokingly

“as if toto, susie and lewis will agree on that, you’re the sweet child of mercedes. Good-luck on pursuing carlos though, he’s a great guy y/n!” Charles ruffled your hair and walked off to the red building.

“I’m submitting my resignation letter tomorrow, i’m telling you Russell, leclerc can’t keep his mouth zipped. If half the grid knows of my little crush, it’s 70% chance my resignation letter will be on toto’s desk latest by next week” you sighed, for seeing the future

“dramatic as always” george laughed

y/nsocials just posted on Instagram (followers only)

tagged lewishamilton susiewolff y/nbestff

liked by georgerussell63 carlossainz55 and 11 others

y/nsocials may & beginning of june dump 💋🎞️

pierregasly this isn’t a dump , i’m not even in the dump cherie

↳ y/nsocials do you hear that? the sound of me not giving a shit ♥️

↳ charles_leclerc can’t back you up sorry mate pierregasly

carlossainz55 cute :)

↳ y/nsocials thank you carlos! ♥️

georgerussell63 alex_albon cute X)

↳ mickschumacher cute :>

↳ lewishamilton cute :p

↳ y/nsocials I’m resigning.

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

SPAIN GP 2023 AFTER PARTY

you were on your way to the after party with alex and lily, the others has already reached and you had to ask for a ride with the couple.

“how’s the progress of you and carlos, i’ve seen the comment”

lily asked u, i wish there was a progress though.

“the only progress there is was the fact my heart beats faster now whenever i think about the comment”

“dramatic as always, but i am being for real. Lily and i are curious, y/n. I can always ask for carlos contacts and pass it to you” alex rolled his eyes

“you were dramatic too when lily answered your dms. No alex, i want his attention the old fashion way, with him giving me his phone number by himself”

you sat back on the car seat with lily making sure your current outfit wouldn’t get ruined

“well i’m sure with what you’re wearing now, his eyes will be stuck on you all night and that phone number will be in your phone as soon as possible” lily commented and that comment had made you feel 100x more delusional as ever

dings

sharls shared a contact with you

sharls : he’s asking where’s your current location, i know the both of will you never do it, but i’m impatient

sharls : if he did ask for your number tonight, it’s because of me

what the fuck? what the fuck does charles means…..

what are you talking about??????? what about me? : y/n

Carlos Operatoooooor

russell changed group name to : carlos operatoooooor

russell added mickey chewsmacker

russell added chewis hamiltons

russell added sharls leclerc

russell: recruited new member(s)

mickey: why did i not know about this y/n

chewis: it was obvious mick, you should’ve seen her having her everyday ‘carlos’ watching hours

russell: every 2pm, don’t ask just watch

sharls: if stares could kill someone, carlos would’ve been dead

i’m in this chat idiots. I’m not invisible. : y/n

albon: we’re on the way, she’s with us! Lily thinks carlos is going to hit on her tonight, let’s see

sharls: i’m not surprised. Let’s see if toto lets y/n walk around though, first challenge 😨

you were going to fucking throw up, you were finally sitting down after celebrating max, lewis and george’s wins. Being in a huge crowded place wasn’t really your forte, but for the sake of your job you had to do it.

Other than that, susie had to bring you around to engage with other teams knowing how anti-social you are, and here you are finally having a breather outside of the club and zero signs of the carlos sainz.

you weren’t really a smoker type of person instead just a casual smoker but ever-since fully adulting, resulting to having a few puffs allowed your thoughts to permanently vanish.

you were covering your shoulders with Alex’s denim jacket (of course with the permission of lily’s) , sitting on the porch of the back exit of the club. Whenever the door swings open, you could here the songs bass booming and you could just feel a headache coming sooner or later.

Just a few minutes in, you felt the denim jacket that was on your shoulders lifted up, and replaced by a red jacket.

“thought this might be a better option, you look much greater in red anyways”

and there he was, carlos sainz taking a seat next to you.

and you’re so sure your heart is over the roof because there wasn’t any gap between you and carlos sainz.

“thank you, i don’t know about red, teal looks much better on me”

“well to me, red looks stunning on you. everything alright? too much to drink?”

if it wasn’t for the amount of blusher you’ve decided to use, the redness on your natural cheeks would’ve given away from the said comment

“just a slight pounding in the head, taking a breather. you want a puff?”

well honestly, you don’t even know if you should be offering him

“thanks for the offer love, but i don’t smoke. do your own thing, i’ll be accompanying you. A pretty woman shouldn’t be alone on the back exits”

if there’s anything a few drinks could do is having you feel so much bolder

“don’t flatter a woman like that carlos, she’s gonna fall for you especially coming from a ferrari driver”

“I wouldn’t mind flattering a woman if it’s you y/n”

there was a moment of silence because you had no idea how to react, “it’s the drunkenness in me but you’re driving me crazy carlos”

“care to explain, mi amor?”

you shook your head because no sane woman would tell the guy they have been eye-fucking that they’re interested

dings

carlos: hey cutie

“that’s my number, got yours from charles, if you’re ever wondering”

incoming facetime from mickey chewsmacker

answer or decline

“that’s mick’s name?” you nodded your head and Carlos laughed

you answered the phone-call and set it to loud speaker

“where are you little lady”

“back exit, it’s too loud in there”

“with mr prince charming?” you could hear Alex’s voice in the background

“if it’s me then yeah, she’s with the prince charming” carlos butt in the call, which made my face turned a shade of tomato red

not knowing mick was crowded around the others was also something you’ll never expected

“so no more staring from the sidelines?” this time, charles

carlos looking at you confused, you refused eye contact with him which made carlos snatching your phone away to have a conversation with charles in italian and with charles drunk on the phone, you knew the moment carlos looked at you wide eye you’ve realised charles had told him those staring moments, he then ended the call

“taking a picture would’ve lasted mi amor, i’m surprised i am unaware”

“i wasn’t looking at you, you were just in the view” you shrugged

“and that view is me?” carlos laughed and rested his head on your shoulders “you’re really cute, do you know?”

“yeah it happens to be you and i am fully aware Carlos”

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

3 MONTHS LATER

y/nsocials just posted on instagram (followers only)

tagged carlossainz55 y/nbestff

liked by charles_leclerc susiewolff carlossainz55 and others

y/nsocials i fell in luv but that’s okay cause i’m in luv 💋💋 #baggedaman

lewishamilton so will you be on merc or ferrari’s side from now on 🫨

↳ georgerussell63 answer y/n. our friendship is on the line

↳ mickschumacher we manifested this but we didn’t foresee this situation

↳ alex_albon yeah whatever they said ^

↳ y/nsocials dramatic all of you. merc forever of course (maybe)

↳ carlossainz55 she’s ferrari’s on sundays

carlossainz55 always swayed by you mi amor 💋

↳ charles_leclerc no longer eye fucking on the sidelines yeah

↳ y/nsocials charles_leclerc STOP PERCEVAL.

↳ y/nsocials love you so so sooooooo much

landonorris boyfriend stealer 💀😠

↳ y/nsocials cry about it!!!!!!!!! mine forever 🫢

y/nbestff give her back to me carlossainz55

↳ carlossainz55 sorry no can’t do

‿︵‿︵୨˚̣̣̣͙୧ - - ୨˚̣̣̣͙୧‿︵‿︵

↳ end note: that’s all!!!!!!! sorry for rarely posting, have been kinda busy w school nowadays! hope you guys enjoy the carlos fluff 💋

[vividachromatic]

Meant To Stay The Worst - Pt. 3

Desc. : Reader meets Alastor’s mother for the first time!

Alastor x reader

Tags: ongoing, marriage, confessions / proposals, manipulation and toxic relationships, canon typical violence and language

((<- Pt. 2 - Pt. 4 ->))

*

To say you were nervous about meeting his mother would be an understatement. If she didn't like you, that would probably be THE dealbreaker, considering the way Alastor talks about her - like she is the most important person in his life.

Alastor found your uneasiness funny and just told you to relax. He told you his mother wasn't a scary person. And she has been looking forward to meeting you for a very long time; ever since Alastor mentioned he was seeing a girl he really liked she's been beyond excited and repeatedly asked him if he'd invite her over.

"That's not what I'm concerned about - I'm concerned about me! I know how to make a bad impression, not how to make a good one..." Not that you cared about the impression you made on other people most of the time. Most of the people you knew where snobs who just pretended to like you anyway.

"Darling. Don't worry about making a perfect impression, my mother is a kind person. She can even see inside people's souls~" He chuckled, "literally..."

"Yeah, I'm not so sure if that makes me feel so much better..."

Plus, the way Alastor seemed to enjoy your anxiousness didn't help either.

Anyway, there was no postponing this you suppose, so you got ready to walk to his mother's house. She seems to live nearby.

Alastor was satisfied with the whole situation right now. After he first decided he was going to confess his feelings to you he was scared of how everything would play out. He likes to be in control of any situation - and even though he tried his best to do that, he still couldn't predict the actual feelings part.

But your reaction to him killing someone was the most confusing thing for him.

You were clearly shocked and probably even traumatized by the event. But not even once did you seem scared of him.

It's more the opposite. Just like him, you were more of a classy person - never really seeking out other's people's touch too much. But after the incident this changed. Not only did you immideatly lean into him when when he tried to comfort you when you were crying, you also seeked out and accepted his touch warmly every single time after the incident.

This odd reaction to seeing someone murder someone else in cold-blood lead him to a specific conclusion: You didn't regard the situation that way. You actually saw it as him protecting you. And ever since that day, you've seen him as your protector. Which would mean that him trying to manipulate you into thinking exactly that actually worked.

But there is one problem with that: he thinks you are way too smart to just fall for his simple manipulation tactic like that. Which is why he at first considered the possibility that you were only pretending to be okay with it and would try to tell someone else as soon as he let you go. But you never did that. Which must mean that you are being willfully immoral.

So, you knew he was manipulating you and played along?

He thought - maybe you wanted to be protected? Wanted to be guided?

Maybe it was because you had a bad father figure in your life or maybe your mind was just a little more twisted than he originally thought?

In any case, this would work for him. You wanting to be guided - him wanting to guide you.

If he played this well - he could very quickly turn this into making you marry him, which could, if you ever changed your mind about him, trap you into the relationship anyway. Even if you would find out about his more sinister hobbies...

It would disappoint him to have that kind of relationship with you, yes, but it could also end with both of you having the ideal relationship - supporting even your most twisted desires while also having a loving husband and wife - later maybe even family.

The two of you approached the house of Alastor's mother now.

His two favorite people were about to meet, and if the meeting went well he was sure he would ask your father for your hand at his meeting with him.

Alastor quietly knocked on the door, while you were standing more behind him than next to him.

Then the door opened, revealing a petite, middle-aged woman with beautiful curly hair. Her face immideatly turned soft when she spotted her son. "Alastor, my dear..." she pulled him towards her into a warm embrace and he, too, had a genuine smile on his face as he leaned down to hug her.

You smiled watching the two of them. A genuine warm embrace between family members isn't something you got to see very often.

When Alastor pulled away from the hug, he pulled you to his side by your waist, so that you were now facing his mother.

...Wait, how should you greet her? Should you shake hands? Bow? ...

In the end you just awkwardly waved at her. The woman looked confused for a second, before she just pulled you into a hug as well. You were surprised, so you forgot reciprocating before she already stepped away from you.

Great, now you made an awkward fool of yourself.

She still held on to your arms, as she looked you up an down. "I, uh- I'm... Y/N?"

The woman let out a small laugh and petted you on the head. "Oh, I know that sweetie, what I didn't know is that you were such a timid one! Come on in, you two. Dinner is almost ready!"

You carefully stepped into the house looking back at Alastor, who just smiled at you and took off your coat to hang it on the wardrobe.

"I'm going to go to get something for a minute, if that's okay, darling? I'll be right back!" He declared and pushed you into the room his mother was in. Before you could protest, he was already gone.

Great. For someone who claims to like you, he seems to really enjoy putting you in uncomfortable situations.

His mother was currently finishing off some rice with different sorts of vegetables and seasonings... "Oh honey, could you please help and cut the rest of these onions for me? Only if it's okay!" She asked you with a warm smile.

Oh oh. Now your horrendous cooking skills would come to show. You were a downright horrible cook - everytime you touched a stove something or someone, would burn. And you never had to cook before... you were rich. Others just did that for you...

But... you were able to cut some onions at least right? Haha...

"Of course, ma'am..!" You smiled nervously. Hoping she wouldn't notice your concern as you picked up one of the knives...

"Oh no, dear! You can't take that knife to cut an onion!" She chuckled, taking the knife from you and handing you a different one.

Nice. Not embarrassing at all.

Now, while you were trying to complete the extremely challenging task of cutting this onion - his mother turned to the other side of the kitchen to finish preparing the rice again.

"You know, I was pretty excited when Al told me that he finally met a girl he liked. My little boy never brought home any girls in his life, so I thought he must either be lying or you're someone real special!" She explained while preparing the food.

You didn't know how to respond, but you were touched by her words. And she confirmed that Alastor really has never dated anyone before - not that you thought that he was lying. You were glad, since you were the same, though you wouldn't have minded either way.

"Look, girl..." The woman who was only a little shorter than you stepped next to you again and took the cutting board from you with a sigh, cutting the onion properly. "I think you're a really pretty girl and I am glad my Al has found someone he likes for once; but I just wanna make sure that you're the right one for my boy, you know? That you're serious about him."

You let out a shaky breath. You were embarrassed at your need of help for such a simple task. Now she probably hates you and-

...

But you were serious about Alastor at least. But how could you properly convey this to her?

"I- I'm sorry, I am really not good at this. But, I really like Alastor. I like him... more than I've liked anyone before-"

You weren't sure how else to put it and stopped yourself - trying to word it differently, but the woman interrupted you with a sudden and short hug.

"That's all I wanted to hear, honey." She smiled warmly at you as she pulled away again.

She took the cutting board with her to put the freshly cut onions inside the rice. "This is Al's favorite meal by the way! If you want to, I can teach you the recipe some day?"

Your eyes lit up in relief. Her wanting to teach you, probably meant she didn't want to never let you see her or her son again. You nodded enthusiastically and she laughed.

Later during the meal the three of you had a nice talk. The house was... warm. It looked smaller than you were used to and the furniture looked very different. But this home was warm, while yours seemed cold. You only had a single dinner with the two of them together, but it felt better than any you had with your own family, no matter how expensive the food may have been.

After leaving his mother's home for that day Alastor asked you if you wanted to stay at his house for the night. You agreed.

When you arrived at his house again you let out a quiet yawn and started taking off your coat. Again, Alastor took it from you to hang it on the wardrobe. Then he gestured for you to sit on a nearby chair.

Confused you wordlessly obliged at which he grinned. He then kneeled in front of you to take off your shoes for you.

You rolled your eyes at him with a chuckle, "Really? You don't have to do that now."

He gave you a wryly amused smile, "I know. I just want to spoil the woman I adore so much."

You let out an embarrassed huff as your face started reddening.

Alastor, perceptive as he is, noticed this of course and made it worse by taking your hand and planting a small kiss on its back.

When he got up again he extended his hand towards you to take and led you to sit on the couch with him.

"See? I told you my mother would like you. She has a knack for seeing who people really are..." Alastor grinned.

"Really?" You asked him.

You liked both of them. But if that was true wouldn't she see that her son is a killer? And that you liked it?

"My mother always said 'what you do for the people you love is more important than what the world wants you to do'." He quoted with a smirk like he read your mind.

Well, if you twisted these words a little the way he saw things could make sense.

You wondered; was the man he killed for you the first person he's killed? You weren't so sure. His movements seemed way too natural. Too calculated.

His behavior afterwards way too uncaring.

...The evil serial killer of Louisiana. His profile fitted Alastor's way too perfectly.

So far he has had four victims. You researched them for a bit. All of them were filthy, power-hungry and abusive men and one woman. The police suspected a vigilante.

Of course you weren't completely sure it was him. But Alastor's certainty that the killer would not go after you was still ringing in your head.

So what would someone who can actually see inside your soul actually think of you?

You didn't think of yourself as a normal person before this, but not as a bad one either. But now...

It wasn't the fact that you didn't care if he was a serial-killer or not that made you bad, it was more than that. It was that some fucked-up part inside of you liked it.

You wanted the man who was sitting next to you right now in every way possible.

You definitely were at least just as bad. It was probably just more in a passive and masochistic way, than his direct and sadistic one.

So, did you really want to settle for this?

...yes definitely.

You didn't care about that man dying that night.

And now you weren't even sure anymore if that's what you've always thought in the first place, or if this is just what you forced yourself to think, so you could get over it.

Regardless, you just felt cold towards that man. He was better of dead, just like all the other people Alastor probably killed.

Distancing yourself from other people's humanity was wrong and narcissistic. You knew that but still decided to go that path.

Decided to be with Alastor. And enjoy it.

"So? You're going to meet with my father tomorrow, right? Are you at least a little nervous?" You asked him after a small comfortable silence between the two of you.

"Hmm... I think nervous is the wrong word. But it would be bothersome, if your father dislikes me." Alastor answered.

"Even if my father doesn't approve of you, I'll still stick with you. You know that, right?" You asked him.

He raised his brow, giving you a half-grin, surprised by your earnesty. "You're such a sweetheart, you know that?" He asked, locking your head between his hands and lowering his face to yours until you were separated only by a few inches.

Your confidence immediately falters and you became putty in his hands again.

He chuckled against your face, seemingly enjoying the effect he had on you. "Y/N, can I ask you something?"

"...Of course."

"How much do you like me?" He whispered against your lips. Not only because he was sure he wanted to take this a step further with you now, but also because he wanted to be able to predict how exactly you'd answer if he'd ask you to be his forever.

Your breath hitched. You weren't sure how to answer.

If you were honest you would have to admit, that you were completely and utterly obsessed with him.

...You already met his mother today; he said he adores you...

It's okay to admit, that you like him, right?

God, how was he the one in control always? And why did you love it?

"I like you, Alastor. A lot." You whispered back. He smiled at that and finally kissed you.

You leaned back into the couch, just letting him kiss you. The kiss was nice. Every kiss with him was. And for the first time he deepened the kiss as it became more sensual.

You gasped into the kiss and he grinned, his tongue sliding over your own and you shuddered as he pulled you towards him to sit on his lap.

Just to catch air the two of you parted for a second, looking into each other's eyes. Both of you could see the desire for the other in them.

Alastor tenderly stroked your hair with one of his hands and cupped your cheek with the other.

You calmly closed your eyes, eventhough your heart was beating like crazy.

"I love you."

Your eyes opened and widened in surprise at his words. He, too, looked a little surprised by his own words when he looked up at you.

He wasn't surprised because he said it. He was surprised because he meant it.

Your gaze softened and you gave him a smile. The most loving smile you ever gave someone in your life probably.

"I love you too, Alastor."

He let out a small sigh in relief. Something he didn't do often.

So you really loved him? Did you mean that?

"I will kill for you, you know?"

He wasn't sure if he would make things bad between you two, if he outright said that, but he had the feeling he wouldn't. You were too perfect for him.

You paused for a second. Then you gave him a weird smile. "I know. And I would do the same."

-----------

Thank youuu for reading!

@cryptidghostgirl @adeadreader

[byunpum]

Hiiiiiiiiii! Can I make a funny T'su'tey request?

Im sure you know the lilo and stitch meme?

the idea is after neytiri and jake mate and become the Tashik and Olo'eyktan, tsu'tey has the freedom to pick a mate, but struggles to find genuine love. So he pleads to ewya for a mate who is "calm, sweet, kind, gentle, soft". But instead ewya gives him the exact opposite XD.

Pair: Tsu'tey x Human reader (why not <3)

Warning: None, tsu'tey being cute. Reader being a brat.

AVATAR MASTERLIST 

"Eywa…it is me again" says tsu'tey as he sits in the spirit tree. Sitting praying with all his heart. "I know I have asked this many times…but could you send me a being who loves me, someone who is kind. The best person you have…someone who will stay with me and not run away from me" says tsu'tey. After all this time, he was pretty sure he was ready to find his ideal partner. When he was younger, he used to be more relaxed about it, even falling in love with sylwanin. After that terrible event at grace's school, tsu'tey's whole life changed. He had now lost the love of his life and had to marry the younger sister of his now deceased beloved.

When jake came to the clan, it was also a big change for him. His whole world changed, and many bad things happened, but also some good things happened in that period. He no longer had to be with neytiri, not that he didn't like her…but they were like siblings. He felt more comfortable now that he knew she had her mate, and he was free. A year had passed since the confrontations with the people in the sky, and he felt it was time to start again. But everything seems to be going against him. No na'vi woman is fulfilling her standards…they're all wonderful. Amazing to be honest…but with none of them he feels that connection that he is supposed to feel when he sees her and knows that she is the one. He used to go pray to eywa to help him and light the way. He knew he was fooling himself, because she didn't work that way…but he had to try. Jake Sully had told him that Eywa had helped him and listened to him that time, why wouldn't she help a member of pure sage like him?

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes in surrender, he felt stupid. Very stupid… sitting down for the fourth time this week. "this is useless" tsu'tey thinks to himself, as he gets up from the ground. And disconnects himself from one of the tree's tentacles. Wiping his knees a little with his hands, he suppers and grunts with disapproval. Maybe he had to resign himself to the fact that he would never find his ideal mate…he would be alone for eternity. Tsu'tey didn't usually show his sensitive side with anyone, but this was affecting him a lot. Seeing the couples together….damn it, was mating season and he was alone. He starts to leave the tree and begin his walk home, again he was going alone to his hut. Walking slowly, lost in his thoughts. He was so immersed in his own being, that he barely heard the strange noises coming from above him.

It wasn't until he heard a loud noise that he stopped in his tracks and looked up. Out of nowhere and as if it was something sent from the sky. He saw a girl fall from a branch. How the hell did she get there? He doesn't know. And why is she here? He was going to find out. The girl fell very hard to the ground, and started moaning. "Shit…that!!! That hurt!!!" you speak, as you get up from the ground sitting on the wet jungle floor. You hadn't noticed tsu'tey's presence, so you were no stranger to being surrounded by tall blue men. So you are still very distracted by your punch, while the man is looking at you with wide eyes. This had taken him by surprise, he just stayed still watching you settle in and moan. You look up, making eye contact with him. "And you don't plan to help?" you speak, sounding rather haughty, how could you be so spoiled if you didn't even know each other. Tsu'tey says nothing and continues to stare at you quietly. "Aren't you going to talk? Ashhh hey YOU BLUE MONKEY HELP ME GET UP, I CAN'T FEEL MY BUTT" You yell, making gestures with your hands. Tsu'tey was in a state of shock, he knew humans were nasty, but you were on another level. No one in his entire life had ever spoken to him like that.

"Did you just call me blue monkey?" tsu'tey repeats what you just said, making sure he heard right. "Yes…blue monkey, are you deaf? With those big ears I doubt it" you speak, as you get up from the ground. You looked sore, your legs were shaking, the fall had been very hard and high. So your body wobbles a little, just as you were about to fall back to the ground. You feel a big hand holding you by your forearm. Tsu'tey holds you in place, observing you and analyzing the figure in front of him. You were a woman, you seemed to be almost his age. But you did not look like the other women he had seen in the human camp. Your hair was messy, your clothes were light, revealing more skin. And you had a few scratches across your face and arms. Where had you gone? "My name is Tsu'tey…nice to meet you" speaks tsu'tey, he had manners..so he was going to introduce himself properly. You feel him slowly let go of you as you regain your balance. "mmm your name is ugly" you speak, looking at him again as you had a cheeky grin on your face.

"Have you no manners or what?" tsu'tey sounds annoyed, moving a little away from you. You laugh, you knew you were teasing him and you really didn't care. "Yes…yes I do. But it's boring" you speak, as you start looking for something on the floor. "My name is Y/N" you speak, ignoring as tsu'tey approaches you again. I was analyzing you carefully, I had never seen you before, and if you were one of those bad humans? They were all supposed to be gone, so who were you. Tsu'tey kneels down to get closer, while he sees you still looking for whatever it is on the ground. He was getting so close, he's barely 1 foot away from you. "could you give me space… you strange thing" you speak, nudging him by his shoulder causing tsu'tey to come down from the clouds. And he will be back to his senses. "Who are you? I have never seen you before?" he speaks, you turn to look at him. He had his face to one side and his ears twitched with curiosity.

"You're not one of the bad guys, are you?" you look at tsu'tey, and laugh out loud. This one looks somewhat confused, and waits for you to respond. "No silly…" you speak up, ignoring him again. "But I've never seen you in that thing that calls it a lab" tsu'tey had to know who you were.

"I am the systems manager…I am not a scientist" you speak. Tsu'tey only understands half of what you just said, so she waits for you to explain more clearly. "Systems?" tsu'tey asks.

"Yeah…systems, these things (you touch the oxygen mask) and computers. Nothing special, I'm just trapped on this planet" you speak, now looking at the man in front of you. "Trapped? You wanted to go back to your homeland?" tsu'tey looked like a little boy, he didn't know why he was so curious about you. You were a damn home destroying human, why did he have to ask you all these things.

You sit on the floor, exhausted. You couldn't find your monitor, your back hurt and you were tired. "I can't go back…so I stayed here" you say, while trying to give yourself a self-massage on your back. "You are bad…and that's why you can't go back?" tsu'tey now copies your previous movements and sits on the floor. A few feet away from you. " Well if stealing 3 Walmart gift cards is being bad..well yes" you speak up. … … … "What is Walm?" tsu'tey was about to start talking, but you make a signal for silence. "Forgotten… I don't say anything. I have no one to wait for me back on earth. So I decided to stay here to help the team" you speak. "But you don't like the na'vi?" speaks tsu'tey.

"My area is technology…not wildlife" you speak, tsu'tey stands up straight. Aouch that had hurt him. He can see that you are still in some discomfort, because you begin to make a few pained noises." And what were you doing up there?" asks tsu'tey, as he sees your eyes move upwards. "I wanted to look for a signal…I wanted to see some videos of me…of my brothers" you speak, he can notice the sadness in your voice. He had no idea what the 'videos' were but he guessed it was something important. "I'm sorry" tsu'tey says, causing you to look up and look into his eyes. You had very pretty eyes, he sees you chuckle a little. And you look down again, now looking at the ground.

There was something about you that attracted his attention, if he felt lost. You looked, and he could sense that you were lost. Like you weren't quite right, for some reason he was worrying about you. And only 15 minutes ago he had met you. The silence was noticeable, you both just lay there…keeping each other company. It wasn't until a seed from the spirit tree slowly approached your body. Tsu'tey noticed their presence and followed the seed with his eyes. Watching as the creature moved from side to side, slowly falling towards your bare knee. It stares at you as you look at it, somewhat surprised but calm. He was about to speak until …..

slaps

"Are you crazy?" shouts tsu'tey lifting your hand from the seed. You had crushed it, you almost broke it. "that was going to sting me!!!" you shout too, watching as he takes your hand and lifts it carefully. Watching as the seed floats back up and flies towards your nose. Tapping it, you bring your free hand to your nose to touch it. "What is that?" you are still surprised. You've never seen anything like this before…you never used to leave the areas you were allowed to. "It is a seed from the spirit tree…they are part of eywa" says tsu'tey seriously. You had heard something about this tree and this eywa. "And it was going to sting me? Those things itch" you begin to speak, tsu'tey still holding your hand. "It won't sting you…eywa doesn't hurt. She wants to communicate" says tsu'tey.

"Well I don't want anything from her…besides I think I was going to get itched" you speak, crossing your arms. Tsu'tey snorts a little, ahhh you were unbearable. "Well…help me get back to the human zone. I have no idea where I am" you speak. Tsu'tey takes a deep breath and gets up from the ground. "Come…I will guide you" he speaks. Watching as you quickly get up jumping up and down in happiness. But you stop, and hold your back. You seemed to be in pain. You both set off to where the village was, the human area was not far from the village. So the direction was the same. Tsu'tey couldn't help but notice how your posture changed every 2 minutes the more you kept walking. "Are you in pain?" speaks tsu'tey. "A little…well a lot" you speak while touching your back.

"I know someone who might be able to help with that. Sure, if you want?" tsu'tey gives you a look, hoping for an answer. He hears you sigh. "It's okay" you speak, you had no choice…in the lab there wasn't much equipment to soothe the pain you were feeling. And you had heard that Navi medicine was very good, so you accepted the help. It wasn't long before you arrived at the navi village, and as you entered you noticed how everyone started to look at you. You were not a familiar face, to be honest it was the first time you were in the village. You had never been there before.

You had come to pandora 2 years before the altercations, and you were from grace's technical support team. You were basically grace's baby, and she loved you so much. You became close friends with Jake and supported your team's cause. You had stayed at the base with max, providing support from the inside. When the humans were returned to earth, you stayed. You had no one to wait for you at home…you were alone. And now you only had your team left, because you had also lost grace. You were never interested in what the Navi were doing, you knew some things. But you weren't aware of everything, like max, norm and jake. But now…everything was new to you. You see how several Navi kids come up to you and touch your clothes. And they laugh. "Hello" you speak, in a low voice. As you followed the annoying navi man who was going to help you. "There it is" says tsu'tey. Pointing to a hut, you could see it was quite crowded.

You both approach the hut, and enter. It was dark, but cozy. And it had a great aroma of medicinal herbs. It wasn't annoying, it was calming. Mo'at looks up as she sees tsu'tey enter, she was going to greet him but is surprised to see who accompanied him. A human with tsu'tey? Something was going on. "Mo'at…we need your help" tsu'tey speaks. Making a sign to you to come closer, you had been standing in the door frame waiting. You were a little scared, everything was new to you. You approach, and feel tsu'tey's hand holding your head. "She fell out of a tree, now her back hurts a lot" says the man, moving you a little to get closer to the woman. You laugh widely, while mo'at grabs your arm to get closer to her. "And what were you doing in a tree….girl what's wrong with you" says mo'at turning you over to examine what you had, pulling up your shirt. "My whole back hurts" you speak, but let out a groan. When mo'at touches the large bruise on your back. "Here it is…look" mo'at says, as you watch tsu'tey reach over to look at your back.

You move and pull down your shirt. "You pervert!!!" you yell a little, mo'at had pulled your shirt way up. You were dying of embarrassment and now he was going to see you up close. Or not…not that. "What's wrong with you…come HERE" mo'at says, grabbing your arm making you sit up. You were small, so it was easy to handle you. Tsu'tey sits in one of the corners of the hut, watching mo'at heal you and take care of you. He laughs a little, watching you fidget and complain about everything. He even watches as mo'at taps you on the head. You were chaos, but chaos that captivated him. After a while, mo'at ordered you to lie down, on one of the mats she had. You had to wait for the paste to dry, plus it wouldn't hurt to relax a little. So she lays you on your stomach, and you close your eyes.

Mo'at approaches tsu'tey, who is still staring at everything with fascination. "That girl…that's a mess" says mo'at in a mocking tone. "eywa…she touched that girl" says tsu'tey while still looking at your figure. Mo'at falls down for a moment, and turns to talk to the boy. "I know…I could feel it. And it has to do with you" says the woman, tsu'tey looks at mo'at in surprise. "With me?" asks tsu'tey, what did he have to do with you, he was just helping you. "mmmm yes….eywa gave you what you were asking for, that's what I could interpret" says mo'at, as he sees tsu'tey's eyes widen. "What's wrong with you?" mo'at is getting worried, tsu'tey was in a state of shock. What did mo'at just say? Eywa sent him…no no no no.

"Mo'at…I asked for a mate" says tsu'tey. Mo'at is surprised and gives him a look at the lying figure of Y/N. "I don't know what to tell you son…I don't know" mo'at doesn't know what to tell him or do, this is very strange. Even for her.

Night came quickly, and tsu'tey decided to stay and watch over you. He could not ignore what mo'at had told him. How could it be possible? Was it possible? He sees you start to get up, sitting up a little on the mat. You were going to touch your eyes, but you bump into the oxygen mask. "shit" you speak softly, as you listen and watch as tsu'tey sits down next to you. "That word I've heard so much these past few years" tsu'tey says in a mocking tone of voice. You roll your eyes, and decide to ignore him. "Feeling better?" asks the man, you turn so you can answer. And you can see how he was sitting. His feet were crossed, his hands were holding his feet nervously, and his tail was wagging from side to side. He looked adorable. "Yes…thank you" you speak, shifting your gaze quickly.

There was a small silence, until he began to speak. "Mo'at… she told me that the seeds of the spititus tree had chosen you" Tsutey says.

"To sting me? Yes" you speak, Tsu'tey sighs, laughs a little. "No…she chose you to" tsu'tey pauses, waiting for you to make a move. He can see, as you look at him slowly. "For what?" you ask. He takes your hand, and gives it a squeeze. You stiffen slightly, and look straight into his eyes. They were bright yellow. "For me." You move your hand, so that tsu'tey releases it. And you move away a little, moving hurts your back a little. So you stop, and tsu'tey tries to help me. "Easy…I" tsu'tey starts to speak, but he feels you push him away. "Don't touch me…you weird blue monkey" you yell a little.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you" tsu'tey says, moving a little away from you. Leaving you more room. He wasn't going to give up. Tsu'tey knew that eywa had chosen you for a reason, maybe you were the one who was going to help him find your ideal mate. "Yes…well you did, you idiot. And if you touch me again I'm going to poke your eye out with my own teeth" you threaten him a little, lying on your side with your back to him. He laughs a little, maybe it was you he had to find.