#and then it became mistakes

[ghoulgeists]

could not fall asleep last night, doodled my ocs being fancy on my ipad instead :^)

[appalachianapologies]

There are many new friends on the archive, and many are young and have only known social media, which is why I wanted to say something!

Ao3 does not have an algorithm! It isn't a social media site, it's an archive.

Posting fics on Tumblr isn't the same as posting fics on Ao3

Ao3 is like a giant virtual bookshelf, and everyone is able to add their own stories to the bookshelf, all stored with different tags and different fandoms. Works are automatically sorted by newest to oldest, but filters, looking at bookmarks, and using the search function can change that.

Certain works are not pushed to the top like social media posts. More kudos and reads don't push a single work to more viewers by some algorithm. Unless otherwise filtered, works will be at the top of the page based on how recent it was posted.

Smaller fandoms get less views, less kudos, less bookmarks, and larger fandoms get more simply because of the number of people inside the fandom.

Ao3 is a giant virtual bookshelf- there is no algorithm, and there is no man behind the shelf pushing certain books forward.

Happy reading, and if you'd like to have more people notice a fic, why not share it with them! Send a dm to a fandom friend and it might turn into one of their favorite fics!

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

[sydneysageivashkov]

eleanor guthrie did not go from wearing cravats and vests to corsets and gowns just for people to say she always dressed like a femme. don't worry ms guthrie I saw you cut away pieces of yourself to achieve acceptability in rogers' eyes and be accepted back into the english upperclass and then die anyway the same way your mother did before you.

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

Bruce regrets sound proofing all his children’s rooms

There are some things parents don’t want to know or hear when it comes to their children and it seemed like a great idea at the time.

That being said, as he looked down at his tired youngest, bottle feeding a baby in a way that seems to be half muscle memory, with a look on his face that can only be encompassed by the sentence “oh shit.”

Bruce was suddenly wondering if he made the right call.

[lunaryhues]

What is Rayman? Well, he's a thingamajig. Next question.

(I got attached to my Betilla design)

[floralcrematorium]

Happy Valentine's Day from The Women Of All Time

@femslashetalia

[mispatchedgreens]

more of xu da's internet activity, placed thoughtfully (to me) in the reincarnated band au, featuring the most beautiful woman alive, one bug person crouched on the rooftop of the recording studio while ouyang is being Fussy downstairs, and the rarest creature ever to be caught on film: grumpy bitch ass smiling. permission to imagine esen, chin to chest, flopped on the couch, staring at ouyang's photo, ablaze with jealousy at all of his interactions with xu da, while wbx rubs at his temples in preparation for yet another oblivious, nonsensical sibling conversation.

[oh-hools]

u guys can see this too. song is i've got me by joanna sternberg

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever

[shady-tavern]

Perfect Nemesis Part Two

Part One Here.

***

You woke in the hero hospital, feeling like you had gotten run over. Aches and pains seemed to fill your entire body. You peeled your eyes open to see Peony across from you, asleep and bandaged, with some stitches along one temple. He wasn’t wearing his mask and you saw his face for the first time since you met him.

Your brows furrowed briefly as you groped for the button that called the nurse. Was it the first time you saw his face? Your head hurt and felt stuffed with cotton.

The nurse working for the Society appeared a second after you sloppily pressed the button, only for your eyes to fall closed halfway through her explanation of the severe overextension of your abilities and how that had translated to damage on your joints and tissue. How you would have killed yourself had you used more of your powers.

When you woke a second time you were just barely more coherent and it was the middle of the night. A dimmed light across from you let you see that Peony was awake, speaking softly with Endless, who sat in the open window, also without his mask.

They both paused and looked over when you made some kind of low sound. Your mouth felt dust dry and your limbs heavy. Everything hurt, but in a bone-deep bruised way and you instinctively knew right away you’d do some serious damage to yourself should you try to use your powers again anytime soon.

"How are you feeling?" Peony asked hesitantly and cautiously, voice quiet but clearly audible in the silent room. You blinked at him, weakly and sluggishly patting around to call the nurse again. You were barely capable of stringing a single thought together.

It was only when your hand bumped the button that you realized you weren’t wearing your ring. You weren’t wearing it and you felt…fine. You felt like you were whole and very much not cursed.

You blinked at them. "Huh," you croaked and passed out again just as they straightened, attention firmly fixed upon you.

When you woke a third time, your mind clear enough that you could actually cling to consciousness, it was to your mentor sitting in a chair beside you.

"Thank fuck," she said the moment you blinked your eyes open and focused on her. Her relief was strong in her voice and openly visible on her face. "You were out for nearly a week. What did you do, kid?"

"Not a kid," you mumbled, but that only made her smile a little. She’d never drop that stupid nickname. Instead of answering, you made yourself move your heavy arm until you could look down at your hand.

Your mentor sobered immediately and you let her take your hand, looking at the spot where a dinged up iron ring had sat for years. You hadn’t taken it off once, not for training, not for bathing and especially not for your last boyfriend who had hated the damn thing. Not that you had liked it, but you had needed it. It had been vital for so long.

"What happened?" your mentor asked quietly. "Did they manage to break the curse?" You shifted your head slightly to peer past her, only to see Peony’s bed empty. "Ah, your buddy is getting a check-up and then he’ll be released later today." 

Your mentor leaned forward a little, turning serious. With more emphasis she said, "Kid."

You had never once been able to hold back when she used that tone of voice. The story spilled forth just as every other story had back when you had been a sidekick and later a fledgling new hero. But you were safe, here and now. 

Your mentor was one of the safest people you knew, she’d go to bat for you at the drop of a hat. You had grown into the hero you were today under her protection and guidance after all.

She was silent for a long moment after you were done and you found it hard to keep your eyes open. 

"I’ll go talk with Peony," she said, giving your hand a parting pat. "Sleep, kid. You really fucked yourself up this time. It’s going to take a while for you to recover."

You mumbled something that was some kind of vague agreement, your eyes falling closed.

*.*.*

Peony was gone when you woke again and you continued to sleep more than you were awake. Sometimes you had visitors, sometimes not, sometimes you woke to people having left gifts at your bedside table.

The time you fell asleep to your superior berating you for destroying 'six and a half fucking buildings you goddamn unbelievable idiot' you were glad to get out of the harsh reprimand. You hadn’t cared about the damage when you had been without empathy, but that hardly mattered. Not when you had caused nearly five million in property damage.

You were very relieved that no one had died. That the people who had gotten caught in the crossfire had been rescued by Peony and, to everyone’s surprise, Endless.

You hadn’t seen your colleague or the villain who had been so eager to be your nemesis since that night in the hospital. You had no idea what to feel when it came to them, but every time you found yourself thinking about them, you touched the spot where the ring had been.

The curse was gone entirely.

The magical expert the Society sent to examine you confirmed that as well, clapping you on the shoulder and congratulating you on getting rid of that horrible thing. You got questioned extensively, but you found yourself skirting over details, citing that you didn’t remember much. 

Your mentor had spoken with Peony once and had said that he would explain himself when and if you were ready to see him again. She had given you a card with his private phone number on it.

"And that Endless fellow will be there too for the conversation, if you want him to be," she had added. Then she had paused, looking at you. "You made quite the impression on him. He had nothing but praise for you."

You had looked away, shrinking bit into yourself. You had too many questions to not want answers, even if everything was kind of a mess. You had no idea if you still wanted to be Peony’s friend or…whatever Endless and you had had previously. 

But they had gotten rid of your curse, even if things had become a bit ugly after they had taken off the ring. Still, that moment of intense betrayal kept hounding you, your ignored pleas, how you had been tied to the ground, utterly helpless.

You found yourself touching your hand over and over, startled alarm finding you for a split second when you didn’t feel the ring, before you remembered that it wasn’t necessary anymore. It was both the greatest relief of your life and something you still had to wrap your head around.

It took some time to adjust to living without a curse after so many years with one.

When you were released from the hero hospital at last with strict orders to take it easy for another month before you could be allowed back to active duty, you were glad to go back home.

You unpacked the bag your mentor had brought you for your stay in the hospital. She was puttered around your home, opening windows to let in fresh air. Your mentor at last opened your fridge and immediately closed it again.

"I’ll go shopping," she said and left briskly with a little wriggle of her fingers.

You tentatively opened your fridge, only to immediately close it again yourself. Well. Taking a deep breath, you rummaged around beneath your sink to get gloves and cleaning products and you got to work, removing food that had had plenty of time to go and rot and mold.

You were just finished with that very disgusting task when your mentor returned and she shooed you away, grumbling that you had to take it easy.

You did take it easy the rest of the day, barely getting up from the couch. Your mentor made sure you had food and left some meals you just had to heat up in your fridge.

"Call me if you need anything," she said after dinner. "I’ll stay in a nearby hotel for another night before returning to work."

Even then you knew she’d drop everything in a heartbeat if you said you needed her help. You resolved to find a good gift for her, to thank her for all her care and her sometimes no-nonsense encouragement during your recovery.

You hadn’t known that overextending your powers could result in a month of bedrest. Then again, apparently you had badly damaged your body in the process and there had been quite a bit that had needed healing.

Empathyless-you was an asshole in all regards.

As you sat alone on your couch you found yourself fiddling with the card Peony had given your mentor. You wanted answers, but you had no idea if you wanted to see him or Endless again.

Maybe a part of you was afraid of what those answers were. Of finding out that the friendship and flirting and banter and easy companionship had only existed so they could trick you.

But, in the end, you wanted to know why they had tricked you more than you were afraid. Why they hadn’t just told you about their plans to remove the curse. You would have let them. You had no idea how much you still trusted them now, if at all, but you had trusted them that much before they forcibly removed your ring.

You leaned back with a sigh and fiddled with the card a moment longer, before you drew up the sort of courage that let you step into costume on a bad day, that made you face villains that sometimes, secretly, frightened you.

The sort of courage that let you keep your head held high the two times you hadn’t been able to save civilians, carrying their limb bodies.

Peony picked up near immediately, his voice tentatively hopeful. "Imagination?"

"Yeah." You were glad that your voice sounded steady even if your heart was beating faster nervously. "You said you were willing to explain?"

"Over the phone or in person?" he asked, voice going a bit softer in a way that made your throat tighten a little. "Whatever you’re more comfortable with. I’ll make sure to get assigned to another city too if you want. I have the paperwork ready to be submitted."

You closed your eyes for a moment. That was all a bit much at once. "Just…why?" It came out more hurt than you had intended.

Peony was quiet for just a second. "I’ll answer, but it would be best if Endless were here," he suggested, voice going a bit tentative again.

"Aright. Sure. Call me back when he’s there." You ended the call before he could say anything else, rubbing a hand restlessly over your face. Your emotions were kind of messy, but at least you had those feelings. You were rid of your curse and that…that meant so fucking much.

It was in all honesty the only reason you were willing to hear them out.

Peony called back quicker than you had expected and from the slight change in audio quality you could tell that he had put you on speaker.

"Hello," Endless said, voice soft and hesitant in a way you had never heard or expected to hear from the confident villain. "I hope you’re doing well?"

"No smalltalk," you found yourself croaking out, your voice cracking a little despite your best efforts. You grimaced and took a breath before you continued. "Just tell me why."

"Why the deception and trickery and why we used your trust against you?" Endless asked and you swallowed past your dry mouth. "It was the only way to lift the curse."

Thankfully, he continued before you had to ask him to elaborate. "The villain who hurt you once met up with my old mentor, ranting and raving. I overheard a lot that day and in all fairness, I had mostly forgotten that day until I met you." His voice turned a little softer. "It took me a bit to remember that you were the hurt sidekick in that public trial."

"What do you know about the curse?" you found yourself asking, worrying the hem of your sleeve between the fingers of your free hand.

Endless made a low, dark noise. "It’s one of the vilest things I’ve ever encountered and that says a lot. The curse isn’t particularly complex, but it’s removal is. For one, it cannot be removed if you want it removed by the person in front of you. As long as you let someone try to take it away, it would not work."

Which was why none of the Society heroes or independent vigilante with magical abilities had been able to do anything.

"We could not tell you about what we had planned," Peony said quietly, regret thick in his voice. "I’m so sorry. I wanted to tell you, but just one mention about it would have made you expect the removal sooner or later. We would have had to wait years to make you actively forget about it for it to work."

"I’m so very sorry as well," Endless said softly. "I wouldn’t have done anything if you hadn’t minded your curse, but it was clear you hated it for both of us. If you never want to see me again, you won’t."

You closed your eyes as the two men fell silent, giving you a moment to work through everything. You ended the call, rubbing your hands over your chin before pressing your face into your palms to just breathe.

Your emotions were all over the place and you had no idea what to think or feel for the longest moment. In the end you texted Peony 'give me some time' and shoved your phone under your couch cushions.

You did not sleep that night, staying awake until the first hint of dawn, staring out across a city you had been protecting for years with Peony at your side. Your friend, your companion, your partner.

And then Endless had shown up. The exciting villain who had shaken your world up in the best of ways for months. Who had made you stop worrying about that damn ring on your finger.

A ring that was no longer needed because of them. You had no idea where that ring was now, but you didn’t want it back either. You never wanted to see the damn thing ever again.

In the end you called your mentor and, as so many other times, laid your troubled heart at her feet.

"That’s a right mess, kid," she said with sympathy and you couldn’t help but snort before, at long last, you found yourself crying. Pent up stress and relief and confusion all poured out in a mess of tears. "There, there, let it all out." And quieter, so you barely heard her, "Maybe I should go rogue and kill that asshole in jail after all."

And then you were laugh-crying and when you calmed down again, you did feel better.

"I’d say let them grovel a while," your mentor said. "If you think you can ever trust them again."

Could you? You wanted to, you realized as you ended the call and sat curled up on your couch, watching as the city came alive the more the sun rose. You wanted to trust them, because…because they made your life better, both of them. Meeting them had brought so much good into your life.

But you couldn’t forget the betrayal and being pinned to the floor. The panic as your ring got stripped away, your pleas ignored. 

You understood why they had done it, considering the nature of the curse. But the mind and the heart were two different beasts and you were in the very fortunate position that neither of them seemed to be able to come to a proper decision.

So you puttered around for a few days, mulling things over until you realized you were just turning in circles. So you called Peony again after staring at your dirty dishes for a long moment, mind far away. He picked up and from the voice in the background that immediately became easily audible when you were put on speaker, Endless was with him.

Despite all the things you wanted to ask and say, somehow the first thing out of your mouth was, "How do you two know each other?" 

Peony huffed softly, "We’re childhood friends, actually. I always knew he was Endless and he always knew I was Peony. I, uh, I was the reason he switched cities in the first place. I had some trouble that he helped me with. Civilian trouble," he added quickly and you felt an unexpected, fresh stab of hurt fade again.

It was Society policy to not share your private lives with each other when you hadn’t been told each others identities. You had always made sure to respect that, never prying and not commenting on slip-ups from Peony or yourself.

"After helping my friend out I didn’t want to go back to Imperia," Endless added. "It was easier to establish myself here than go through the hassle of clearing my old territory from the rabble. And, well, Imperia didn’t have you either."

You had no idea what to say, so you changed the subject. "Why were we in the same hospital room, Peony?"

"You don’t remember? My mask got eaten by the void," he said and it took you a moment to recall, that, oh, yeah, he was right. Your memory was a little blurry, especially with how fast it had all happened. "Along with half my outfit. Any longer in there and I probably would have lost some pieces of me too."

Endless was audibly grimacing when he added, "I tried to negate the damage as much as I could, but the void really, really doesn’t like anything that’s not me."

That didn’t surprise you. Every brush of the void during fights had told you as much, even though you had trusted that Endless wouldn’t use it against you.

"Was my mask still in place?" you asked, because the nurses would not have unmasked you without your permission, no matter if your partner had shown you his face or not. Both men made a low, unhappy sound.

"The glue we used apparently couldn’t withstand the amount of power you put out in order to make that dragon," Peony explained. You blinked in surprise, you hadn’t even noticed that. "Which, by the way, what the fuck? I didn’t know you could do that."

"Neither could I," you admitted after a moment. "Having no empathy meant I didn’t care about you or myself."

Peony’s mirth noticeably fell away. "I can’t tell you how sorry I am. About ambushing you and making you think we betrayed you. We tried to come up with so many different ways to get that ring without you catching on, but you always guarded it like your life depended on it. Which, knowing what we know now, it actually did."

His words gave you pause. "Wait, what?"

"Oh, you didn’t notice?" Peony sounded surprised. "My frie- I mean, I stole your gloves on multiple occasions, but you always had backups. I tried to 'stumble' into you a couple of times if they got damaged in fights too when Endless was nearby to try and yank the ring off. Endless tried to tug them off too."

"I also tried to remove them with my powers, but that was too finicky while we fought," Endless admitted. "I’m not really good at that delicate stuff when it comes to my powers. It takes so much concentration that I usually just get a headache."

You stared at the opposite wall and the framed artwork on the wall, baffled and unsure what to say. All this time you had thought that you had just forgotten your gloves, especially since they always turned back up. You had thought Peony had just been tired or injured whenever he had tripped and you had adjusted to catch him.

"I couldn’t invite you out to drinks either or I would have gotten you wasted enough to let me pull the ring off," Peony added after a moment. "Which would still have been a major asshole move, I know that, believe me. You were always very firm on not telling each other who we were, so that plan would have never worked."

"And I didn’t want to ask you out knowing I was going to do…that," Endless said, voice lowered and laced with a quiet sort of ache. "Doesn’t matter that I have no chances now, I never wanted to taint whatever we had that way."

You struggled with finding your voice for a couple of seconds, Peony and Endless waiting patiently for you to speak again.

"Why didn’t you trick me sooner?" you asked and they were silent for a long moment.

"I like you, you know," Peony said at last, his voice heavy. "As does Endless."

"More than that, really," Endless added so quietly you almost hadn’t heard him. You suspected he actually hadn’t meant to be heard by you at all.

Peony continued, "We care about you and the more we did, the more we hesitated. It became harder to go through with it the longer we waited."

You slumped back against your couch, feeling conflicted all over again. 

"I’m truly so very sorry," Endless said softly. "If you are willing to let me I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

"As will I," Peony said firmly. "But if you never want to see us again, one word is enough and we’ll vanish from your life."

"We’d still see each other during seminars and Society meetings," you found yourself pointing out and Peony hesitated in a way that made you frown and sit up. "What?"

"I would leave the Society," Peony said. "I’ve wanted to go independent for a while now, so I plan on going somewhere else to open my own office. Just, uh, just so you know, you’d be welcome as my partner. If you want."

Independent hero offices existed everywhere, they worked together with the Society and the government as well as companies. They could be quite successful if done well and you didn’t doubt that Peony was quite capable. He’d make it work.

Peony hesitantly added, "In all honesty, I think I’ll go independent regardless. I’ve been a bit unhappy with working for the Society for a while now."

The Society wasn’t perfect, that was true, and you could admit that the idea of being your own boss was an unexpectedly interesting and, well, rather tempting. You would have said yes, you realized, before this entire mess with the ring.

A part of you still wanted to say yes.

As you tipped your head back to stare up at the ceiling, you came to a decision. You had no idea if you would regret it, but it felt like you’d regret it more if you just…gave up. Ran away. You shifted your fingers to press your thumb of the same hand against the spot where the ring used to sit.

"No more secrets," you said at last. A high demand in your field of work. Secrecy was a big part of the business, both for villains and heroes.

"Anything you want to know, I’ll tell you," Endless said without an ounce of hesitation.

"Aren’t you scared I’m going to use that against you?" You couldn’t help but ask, pushing just a little, because if he told you everything you wanted to know you could easily sell him out to the Society.

"You are a truly good person," Endless answered, voice firm and once again without a hint of hesitation. "And should you decide to betray me in the end in answer for my transgressions, I will only bow my head and call it fair."

He sounded like he meant it. 

"Why don’t I start," Peony said and you heard the careful hope in his voice, could imagine the little smile that curled in the corner of his mouth. Like a small flower yearning to bloom. "Hello Imagination, you know me as Peony, but my real name is Florent Quill and I visit hospitals and nursery homes in my free time to leave bouquets for the people there."

That was so very Peony. Florent. You turned the name over in your mind and found it fitting.

"And my name is Ashton Bach," Endless answered, a smile audible in his voice. "At your service. I’m not nearly as nice as Flori, but I do enjoy making share holders and PR teams panic over stocks on the weekends. But I think you already knew that. Oh, I have a cat, Powder, she’s very sweet."

You found yourself smiling a little at his description and the way his voice grew fond and warm.

"Also, I’m deathly allergic to peanuts," Ashton added. "And I cry every single time I watch Pride and Prejudice."

"I can attest to that," Florent answered dryly and Ashton barked out a brief laugh, raspy and brightly amused.

You curled up against your couch, hiding a smile against your knees. You were still quite upset, deep down, but something about this conversation eased your heart a little. Took away some of the ache and that unsure uneasiness that you felt around them.

"Anything else you want to know?" Ashton asked.

"Not now," you said and hesitated. "But maybe we can talk again later?"

"Anytime you want," Florent promised. "We’ll be here."

You said your goodbyes and hung up and slumped sideways into the pillows. You felt better and even hesitantly hopeful. You fiddled with your phone and wondered if rebuilding trust was that easy. 

*.*.*

It was not that easy, not at all, but slowly, with every conversation you felt less hurt, less backstabbed, less unsure. You knew that they had only wanted to help, but sometimes you woke up from a nightmare where you got the ring ripped away, frantically searching for it. It always took you a moment to remember that you didn’t need it anymore.

Sometimes you dreamed of tearing them apart and it didn’t matter. Not even in the nightmares where you died too along with them. A lack of empathy meant a lack of…anything, really. Anything that mattered, that made you human and kind and stupid and passionate and lazy and all the things that made up this existence on earth.

You had hard conversations with them and it helped that they never shied away from you when you allowed some of the hurt to bubble to the surface. You still hadn’t seen either of them, but bit by bit you allowed your closed off heart to open up again.

And before you knew it, you were ready to return to active duty.

"Don’t worry, I’m taking time off," Florent had reassured you. "You won’t have to see me until you’re ready."

It felt weird to return to work alone and changed. To no longer need the intently protected gloves and to walk the streets with only some occasional fights against a handful villains who wanted to test their mettle against you.

You used your powers faster than before, imagination leaping to your fingertips, eager and hardier and bigger than before. You created things quicker than ever and every creature was just a tad more dangerous than before.

Florent and Ashton did stay away like they had promised. And as one week turned to two, then three, you noticed their absence more and more. The break room remained empty, no friend and colleague there to greet you with smiles and flowers. No powerful and genuinely fun to fight villain seeking you out and handing over the off-switch for the world for a little while at the same time.

No warm hugs and friendly nudges, no promisingly lowered voices and excited grins, no flower crowns on your head and no murmured words that were promise and flattery all at once. 

You ended up calling your therapist and you had a long, tough session. When you left, your eyes were swollen from crying, but you felt like you could breathe properly for the first time in far too long. Your mind and heart felt blown clear at long last and you knew what you wanted.

"Hey," you said when you called Florent, the call getting picked up nearly immediately. Ashton was present too today, he wasn’t always, but often enough that calling Florent first was just easier. "Let’s meet."

*.*.*

Seeing Florent and Ashton again, entirely out of costume, was a little strange, but you were glad to see their faces. They smiled at you and Ashton’s faintly glowing eyes were soft and hopeful, never once straying from you.

A small flower bouquet laid on the table of the café, all your favorites rolled up in pretty paper.

"Hey," Florent said, the faintest of nervous undertones to his voice. "It’s good to see you."

You sat down across from them and realized that seeing them out of costume helped. You were still rather more nervous than you had expected, but the hurt was only a quiet ache now, no longer the fresh, bleeding stab that it had been previously.

"I still want to say sorry again," Florent admitted with an apologetic smile. You had told him to stop apologizing after the sixth time and you pinned him with a look.

"I heard you," you said. "I just…needed some time."

"You are entitled to that and more," Ashton agreed easily and waved over a waitress. "Order whatever you like, it’s on me."

"On you or the businesses you like to rob?" you couldn’t help but ask and his grin got delighted, his eyes going a bit sharper, a bit more intense like they did when you fought.

For a brief moment you wondered what battling him felt like now with your powers having grown fiercer. You wondered how far you could push, how little you’d have to hold back with Ashton. If you’d have to worry about actually hurting him at all when you fought him or if he’d meet you every step of the way.

Florent just sighed in fond amusement. "Don’t get him started," he said in a conspiratorial tone, though he didn’t bother to lower his voice. "He is quite passionate about that topic."

"They are just so stupid," Ashton said as though he couldn’t help himself. "And quite awful, really. Besides, I don’t touch the businesses that are actually good to their employees, you know."

You did know. You knew more about both Ashton and Florent than ever before now. The waitress arrived and you ordered and she left with a smile and brisk steps.

There was a beat of silence, before Ashton leaned forward and asked, "Have you seen the newest announcement for Janet’s books?"

You couldn’t help but light up, as did Florent and before you knew it, you were deeply in a discussion about your favorite book series. A book series Ashton and Florent were big fans off as well. And now those books were supposed to become a TV show and it was rather exciting.

Your conversation moved naturally without much issue at all, rolling from topic to topic as you ate and drank. You laughed and smiled and before you knew it, Florent excused himself.

"I’ll be meeting up with my mum in ten minutes," he said regretfully. "I’ll see you soon?"

"Yeah." You found yourself smiling up at him, then hesitated and you bumped your shoe lightly against his. "Come back to work, alright?"

His face lit up, relief and something warm and bright making him look as happy as you had ever seen him. "I will. And just so you know, the offer of partnering up still stands if that’s something you can see yourself doing." He glanced at his phone when it pinged and winced. "Shit, she said she arrived early. Please excuse me."

He briefly touched Ashton’s shoulder as he got up, sent you another smile and hurried out of the café.

"Want to go for a walk?" Ashton offered, gesturing at the good, if a bit cold weather outside. "We could talk more privately if you want."

You considered the offer, then nodded. Ashton paid and left a generous tip, before you got up. You made sure to take the flowers along and you soon found yourself walking through the nearby park with your former nemesis. Or maybe still nemesis? You weren’t quite sure what the two of you were now.

"You know, I still want to apologize too," Ashton said, looking ahead, his hands buried in the pockets of his jacket. "I know it sounds like I’m feeling sorry for myself, but I just can’t forget the way you looked at me."

Your light mood turned serious and you looked ahead yourself, watching some teenagers jostle each other, laughing at whatever one was showing the other on her phone.

"I wish you would have done it sooner," you found yourself saying at last. "Before I got so attached. Maybe then it would have been easier."

He winced. "Yeah, you’re probably right. I just…" He hesitated, then sighed and his shoulders slumped a little. He smiled a little as though he couldn’t help himself and it was the softest smile you had ever seen. "I think you don’t know how amazing it is to fight you. How you light up when you get to cut loose a little or how little you are afraid of my powers. You never were. Most people run away the second they get close to the void."

He huffed a soft noise, amused and so warm it made the slight chill of the early autumn air disappear. "And then I got you to talk to me, to banter with me. You’re so quick on your feet and you are so damn funny." His small smile faded. "But you are right. In my desire to hold on to those moments for just a little bit longer I ended up hurting you worse."

He tipped his head to look at you, those faintly glowing eyes serious. "I’m usually a pretty selfish person and petty as fuck too, but I messed up here. I shouldn’t have let my feelings get in the way." 

He looked ahead, a wry twist to his mouth. "When I realized what you meant to me, I knew I’d never get to be close to you again if I went through with our plan. That I’d never get to talk with you like that again."

You fiddled with your phone in your pocket, shifting your other hand to once again press your thumb against the spot where the ring used to be.

"I don’t want you to stop," you found yourself saying quietly. Ashton beside you jolted, his surprised gaze meeting yours. Hope made his eyes a little brighter, even as he visibly tried to reign himself in.

"Are you sure?" he asked softly. "I will respect your choices, no matter what." His expression turned hard as he looked away, his shoulders tensing and hunching a little, making him appear smaller. "I will never again ignore what you say."

You looked ahead and took a deep breath, exhaling slowly.

"If this is going to work, we’re going to couples therapy," you said and you heard the sharp breath he took. This time his hope was almost painful to look at.

"Of course," he said. "I’ve been seeing my therapist about this mess myself. Do you have a couple’s therapist in mind? Or should we go to one of ours?"

You mulled that over. "Let’s try ours first, if they agree," you said. "If that doesn’t work, we’ll look for someone specialized."

Ashton nodded with an open, still so very hopeful smile. You noticed the way he pulled his hand out of his pocket, as though he was about to reach out, when he immediately pulled back again. Without much thought, you offered your own hand, not looking at him.

His skin was warm and his palm and fingers calloused when he took your hand as though it was the most precious thing in the world. It made your chest both feel tight and too full.

"Can I still flirt?" he asked after a moment of silence and you found yourself laughing briefly, softly.

"Don’t you dare not to."

"Nicknames?" Ashton asked, that excited, wild-edged smile appearing on his face as he shuffled a step closer to you, still holding your hand so very gently.

"Let’s hear it," you said, unable to stop yourself from smiling back.

He lit up as though he had waited for this moment for ages. "Darling Treasure, brilliant Menace, amazing Foe, my lovely Nemesis -"

You couldn’t help but laugh and duck your head at the same time, flattered and flustered. "Those are just compliments."

He leaned forward a bit to meet your gaze, that wild smile looking downright, well, downright goddamn besotted. "Maybe," he said. "But they’re all true to me."

You had no idea what to say, but whatever expression was on your face, he seemed quite happy about it.

"So, darling Nemesis," he said, that wild-edged smile still on his face even as his voice turned soft and low, the way it used to during your most exciting fights when he’d murmur right by your ear. "Will you let me take you out to dinner?"

You looked up at him and your smile took on a teasing note. "Should I?"

His smile grew into a grin, eyes glowing just a little brighter. "I’d say so. I could take you somewhere cozy and private or fancy and expensive. I do have company money to spend." His grin got a little toothy at those words. "Or I can go and cook you something, set up my little backyard with fairy lights and flowers and in the end we’ll still eat on the couch because Powder will trap one of us the second we dare to sit down inside."

You felt yourself softening. "I haven’t had a good home cooked meal in forever," you said, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. His hand shifted, his fingers interlacing with yours. 

For once you didn’t need a reminder that the ring was gone and no longer needed, not when his skin pressed warm against yours, his hold secure. There was no space for dinged, cold iron.

"Then I better do my best," he said softly. "Maybe I’ll even get you to fall in love with me one of these days."

You didn’t tell him that you were halfway in love with him already. That you had been for months and that, once you had worked through a large part of the emotions of the ring incident, those feelings had slowly, gently, bubbled to the surface again.

"Maybe it won’t take as much effort as you think to get there," you said and when you glanced at him, his expression was so open it almost hurt to look at.

"Darling Nemesis," he said, quiet and reverent and so very lovingly. "You are truly the brightest, most amazing person I ever met." He reached up with his free hand and you realized you had stopped walking. His fingertips brushed your cheek, leaving streaks of warmth behind.

"My perfect nemesis," he whispered. "If only you knew how brightly you shine in my eyes."

And when you tugged him a little closer, shifting up to meet him, he pressed a warm, smiling kiss against your cheek. Maybe not everything was perfect, you certainly had some shit to work through together, but you knew you could do it.

His hand was gentle, his touch loving, his fingers elegant and strong between yours and you smiled at the lack of rings you felt, the warmth that was there instead.

Yeah, things were going to be just fine.

*

Taglist:

@permanentlydepressedpigeon @thesaltofcarthage @those-damn-snippets

[spectral-snippets-and-drabbles]

Beware the Blob Mafia

Where Danny is younger (12-ish) wants to be an entomologist (Insect Scientist) instead of an astronaut and develops a different core as a result...an Insect core!

Also, I kind of headcanon that Blobs are animal ghosts and Zone-born ghosts while Shades are intelligent Sapient ghosts who crossed over the the Infinite Realms.

~•~ ~•~ ~•~ ~•~ ~•~

• It all started when a blob got caught in the middle of a fight with one of his rouges. The little blob remembered Danny when he released it and a small bundles of them from his parents' traps. Intially, they saw the boy as an unusually powerful newborn predator, so they tended to stay away to avoid being eaten by him up until they realize he was purposely freeing several dozens of them from the bad human scientists with no sinister intent.

- They decide to form a symbiotic relationship with Danny by becoming a loyal swarm in the hopes of staying close to him as protection, as they are lowest on the food chain. The young Halfa has no idea they imprinted on him, he thinks they're just being extra friendly.

Blobidious (as Danny named him) and his group bring refined ambient ectoplasm and human food to their protector to keep both sides of the Halfa nourished. They unintentionally stole from random restaurants, stores, and homes for a little while until Danny catches wind of food going missing from people's houses and has to teach them to not do that. Though, the occasional Nasty Burger wouldn't hurt anyone...a small fee in the shape of a combo meal for keeping Amity Park safe, if you will.

- Thankfully, Sam and Tucker help by having food stuff stashed away in their rooms at their houses for the little battalion to grab for him when he's hungry, as his own home is to dangerous.

• As time passes, Danny's new ghost core slowly evolves to become a living hive/den for blob ghosts to live in where they rest after a day of successfully working on collecting nourishment for their protecter. With the area around his core becoming a small pocket dimension that serves as the main nesting area for them, adorned with a honeycomb pattern over its surface.

- Danny's human body has also evolved to hide the ecto signature of the swarm and himself as a defense mechanism, making the Fenton household defenses unable to detect their ecto signatures, much to his surprise and relief. When he transforms for the first time after his body successfully completes its metamorphosis, he appeared more insect-like in the beginning.

(Think like Devorah from MK series.)

Due to the nature of having a bestial core, he can transform into a large variety of Insect/Human forms and utilize their abilities via his Obsession with bugs. Danny's already insane strength and skill set being amplified by using the powers of the most unique insects on the planet.

• Danny's naturally produced ectoplasm from his body combined with the refined ambient ectoplasm collected by the swarm creates a ghost jelly. As he uses it to revitalize himself for the first time, the effects are almost instant, with wounds healing themselves rapidly and finding himself full of energy that lasts for days with no need for sleeping or eating. Due to the energy crash, he uses it sparingly, which causes an overflow resulting in a leaky core and him puke up the excess amounts.

Not wanting to have it happen again, he lets his swarm have the excess as reward for everything they've been doing for him, completely unaware of the hell he was gonna unleash on everyone with this offering to his little buddies.

~•~ ~•~ ~•~ ~•~ ~•~

• They proceed to evolve rapidly and become much more powerful as a result of eating the jelly. They begin to specialize and diversify their roles to better aid their boss to help him succeed and survive in Amity's ghost-ridden madness. Their symbiosis has resulted in Danny learning a form telepathy only he and the Swarm can communicate with.

From the simple blob ghost, Collectors, Warriors, Hunters, Scouts, and Workers arise to fill new roles. What's more astounding thing is the fact that they aren't just stronger, but have a higher intellect and can think and behave with reason, picking up on Danny's thought process and following his lead.

- Collectors are tasked to seek out ambient ectoplasm and food for the Danny. They also evolved in a way to leech it from hostile ghosts and follow hunters/soldiers to aid in subjugation. They can even drain humans attackers of their stamina and emotions, stripping them of their will to fight and leaving them unable to act.

- Soldiers are responsible for accompanying Danny to fights and following his orders on the field. They are also tasked with protecting the civilians from other ghosts looking to cause harm and evacuate the nearby area. The townsfolk were intially terrified, seeing monstrous ghost bugs, but calmed down knowing that they were Phantom's " pets", ready to defend them all.

- Hunters specialized in stealth, ambush and hit-and-run tactics, purposely venturing out into Amity Park and seek out his rouges in packs and dragging them back after paralyzing the offenders to be souped with a few Collectors in tow to squeeze 'em dry.

- Scouts are the crew that watched over Danny when he sleeps or when he's unable to transform into Phantom at the time, patrolling Amity Park for ghostly activity. If they saw/sensed a nearby ghost, they would emite a pheromone to alert the horde.

- Workers kept their intial blob form and stay inside Danny to be on standby to strengthen his body via nurturing it and repair it from the inside, taking the non-combat role; focusing on healing his wounds and making his body much more durable and healthy by merely being the caretakers of their boss. Thanks to their continued efforts, it increases the space for small pocket dimension to carry things he would need and increase the capacity for the swarm's hive.

His body is at its peak and the definition of perfect health. Perfect sight, hearing, strength with a quick healing factor for a boy young as he!

• Danny was intially surprised when the Swarm first came out of their volition to fight and was worried for them. But after seeing them pull a Cujo and transforming into Insect monsters of various sizes to beat down the unsuspecting victim rouge (Box Ghost), he's relieved that they're safe and he's excited that he's no longer alone in the literal fights against ghosts and that his friends don't have to jeopardize themselves without proper backup.

• Meanwhile, Danny's rouges are having an awful time in the wake of his growing bond to his Swarm. They can't enter the living world without a literal army of blob ghosts waiting for them to pop out the portal.

- Skulker tried to hunt them down only resulting in him getting his suit torn to shreds by the Welp (Phantom/Danny) when one of his blobs got hurt by the hunter's stray shot.

- Ember tried to pull a Pied Piper and force them under her control, but it only resulted in her guitar getting badly damaged and her ectoplasm sucked out of her by the Collectors.

- Spectra and Bertrand developed a severe phobia of insects after they brought her scheme crashing down and nearly killed them both after she tried to manipulate Danny like in canon, reveling in his despair until it brought the full fury of the swarm to make the attempt to destroy her when she made him upset. The swarm would've succeeded if Danny didn't call them off and she hasn't returned from the Zone since.

- Technus kept having his machines melted by corrosive acid being spat at him and ripped apart with the insane bite force of the insects assaulting him.

- The only one who managed to get passed them was Cujo. The pup's obsession wasn't destructive in nature and took a liking to Phantom and his hundreds of friends, even going as far as to acknowledge Phantom and even listen to him, making him get a pass while the others were stuck in the Zone, totally not jealous.

• The ghost pup was able to be stopped by Danny and the Swarm before he could destroy Axion Labs, making Val see the infamous "Spectral Skitter" in a more positive light.

She was a little mad, but seeing Phantom laughing as he gave the ghost puppy his favorite toy gave her a somber reminder that they both, the puppy and the ghost boy, had died way too soon. Val would still become Red Huntress, but less out of revenge, but to find out more about Phantom, becoming the 4th person to know Danny's secret.

• Vlad is rather good in this au! The sting of Jack and Maddie's abandonment made him a recluse and he refused to try and find happiness out of fear of being abandoned again. Causing his once green ectoplasm to become a shade of violet, as it was his pent up love made manifest.

- But Vlad wouldn't let that stop him, nor would it hold him back in life! He came into his own in Wisconsin after starting a successful chain of brands revolving around dairy goods, using a small portion of the earned funding to research ghosts in his free time using actual methods of study and not the havoc he's heard regarding a certain set of ectobiologists. He honestly can't help but be worried about young Daniel and Jasmine. He can only imagine that whirlwind of a life the children must have, having his former friends as parents.

- After making enough progress, his therapist suggests Vlad getting back out there and try giving the socializing scene another shot, as the Halfa himself mentioned that he missed companionship during their last meeting. Being socially inept, he decides to transform and look around for potential associates while invisible. So lost in thought that he ended up in Illinois on accident when his ghost sense went off like a bomb.

- He jaw fell open when he couldn't believe what he was seeing. He saw giant ghost insectoids that were taking down several Ecto beasts being led by Skulker, who seemed to have tamed (intimidated) them to his side. Another group was taking the people far away from the fighting and standing guard over them. Despite his curiosity being peaked, Vlad couldn't help but groan loudly and facepalm. The tin can tried skinning the older halfa in the past, only for it to end with the said Halfa threatening to destroy the little nuisance's core if he kept it up. He hadn't had a problem since, but seeing the "Greatest Hunter" again made his eye twitch something fierce.

"When I get that welp's pelt I'll–"

"Prove to everyone that you're the greatest hunter ever and yada yada yada...Soup Time!"

Along with his defeated beasts, Skulker is absorbed into the Fenton Thermos and Phantom powers down back into his human form after hiding in a nearby alley...not even realizing that Vlad just saw him do that.

• Vlad immediately knows that this is Daniel Fenton, due to looking up the Fentonworks Website in the 'About Us' page and seeing the major similarities between the "two" boys". He also knows that Phantom is labeled as the "Ghost Menace"...who was constantly being hunted by Jack and Madeline, getting shot at like it's open season, causing needless destruction in their wake...like how they tried to hunt him a few years prior...

- Knowing Jack and Madeline, This makes poor Vlad's mood go from bad to infinitely worse because that meant that they had no idea that they've killed their own child (like him, oof) and have been hunting him since his first appearance in Amity. He immediately retreats back to his castle and has a severe panic attack.

• After calming down, Vlad will probably try to murder his old friends like in canon by inviting the family to his place, but it comes from a messed up sense of needing to protect Danny from his disastrous parents, seeing the younger as a victim of his parents recklessness. It takes a lot of convincing, but Danny is able to get him to stand down and explain that his parents aren't as dangerous as he says they are. Except Vlad had made very good counterarguments that made the younger Halfa question the doubts he had about his parents.

- It doesn't help that the original members of his swarm don't answer when he asks for a biased opinion in his favor. Surely his folks would still love him once he tells them what happened down in the lab...right? Danny makes the protocol "Friend or Foe" with Sam and Tucker and creates a guideline depending on which way the wind blows that fated day.

- Vlad gave him his number, a key, and a room for him to stay at the castle should he be inclined to take the offer should the worse come to pass. Telling the young badger that he had a place to retreat to in case things goes sideways and someone willing to train him as well.

• Jack and Maddie are up to their usual activities, but they meet more resistance by both the ghosts and people of Amity Park.

- The blob ghosts they usually catch to turn their ectoplasm to power their weapons or experiment on have made an alliance with Ghost Boy, Phantom, who made them far more powerful and elusive than they previously were. It doesn't help that their failed attempts to grab one usually end up with some form of property/vehicle damage while Phantom and his monsters scatter and vanish as soon as they arrive.

- People are genuinely looking to the literal ghost child (Phantom) for protection and has been keeping the streets of Amity Park safe from ghosts more than the proclaimed "Ghost Experts". He even began rehabilitating most of his old enemies at this point and helped them find non harmful methods for them to fulfill their obsessions at this point of the timeline. They couldn't defeat him or his army, so they yielded and gave his methods a chance with good degrees of success.

When a curious person (Jazz, the daughter of the town ghost experts) "asked" about a ghost's obsessions and why they fight, Danny goes into extreme detail (thank you, Clockwork and Pandora!) about why it is a ghost would do the things they do, debunking many ectobiologists theories and scientific discoveries made by the field of study.

• It felt like a slap in face and all their hard work was being undermined.

- This causes a screaming match between Maddie and Phantom. Both who are refusing to back down and causing a crowd to form.

"You're kind are danger to humans!"

"Have you seen how you nutjobs drive!? There's a reason nobody parks their cars on your street! You're a living road hazard!"

"You ghosts have been terrorizing the town!"

"Excuse me!? We've been PROTECTING it from your mistakes! Maybe if you actually studied ghosts instead of labeling us non sentient and cutting us up and making them live ammunition, you'd get better results!"

• It just keeps going until something in Danny starts snapping. He's already past sobbing and red in the face with panic and anger, the swarm is practically going feral as they sense the distress rolling off of him in waves, waiting for these humans to dare to make a move. Snarling, hissing and growling could be heard from hundreds of creatures slowly manifesting in the sky, floating with eyes glowing blood red.

People begin to start to worry out as they never seen Phantom's pets like this before...but then again...holding guns up to a kid who died recently and protects them from both the ghosts and the Fenton's daily madness isn't exactly a good image.

"You may have fooled everyone else, but you haven't fooled us, Phantom Menace! If we let our guard down, your kind will exploit us and we'll all be paying for it!"

And just like that...the final thread self control snaps and Phantom explodes. His scream of anger is amplified by his swarm and takes out most of the devices powered by ectoplasm.

Pay for it...PAY FOR IT!? WHAT DO YOU NOW ABOUT "PAYING FOR IT" WHEN ALL THIS WAS ALL YOUR FAULT!? ALL BECAUSE YOU MADE A LITERAL PORTAL TO HELL! YOU'RE SO OBSESSED WITH GHOSTS YOU HAVEN'T EVEN NOTICED WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME..."

The silence that came after was deafening and as the "good doctors" try to object, they themselves are stunned into silence as well when a ring forms around Phantom's waist and reveals who he actually is. Gasps and shouts of surprise are heard as a teary eyed boy stares down at his parents from a roof, glaring icy daggers with tired eyes.

"You were always in the lab, for days on end, as Jazz and I grew up. She put up with it and accepted the fact that work took priority, but I didn't! I hated that stupid portal and I went into the damn thing trying to make it work so you could pay attention to us again...but it turned on with me inside because a "genius" put the power button inside...which I hit on accident...making me die alone!

My grades dropped off a cliff because I had to step up and take responsibility for YOUR obsession with ghosts! I lost so much sleep because there were threats almost every other day trying to cause problems for Amity Park! Jazz was almost murdered and I almost had to kill the ghost to stop her from harming my sister! I had to literally beat my rogue's gallery into submission so they could behave and to protect them from ghost hunters so I could get to live a semi-normal life again! My so-called evil "parasites" have been helping me out keeping everyone who saw me as some weird freak safe since we teamed up and I won't let you slander them or myself anymore!"

It made the people of Amity feel sick to know the truth. The small kid who likes bugs who was supposed to barely start high school was the same friendly ghost who constantly charged into battle to keep everyone safe. His friends and enemies alike were under his protection out of the kindness of his heart when he could've easily used his powers for mischief, or worse, evil. As the realization began to sink in, people began to whisper and mutter to each other.

"An actual kid was defending us the whole time!?"

"Bug-a-Boo was really just a kid..."

"Danny Fenton is the Spectral Skitter!?"

"THEY KILLED THERE OWN KID!?"

That's what made people turn on the Fentons with the looks of disdain and anger. People were forming a protective ring around Danny as they continued to bombard his family with accusations and throwing insults. "Hey, Jazz is innocent in all of this, so leave her out of the hate mob! My sister barely found out and has been taking care of me better than our own parents well before I died...was there for me when things were at their worst fighting back the ghost..."

As the two Fenton siblings looked at each with soft, reassuring smiles, the tender moment was ruined when a blast went off, screams were heard and Danny stumbled back in shock at the sudden pain and blood blooming in his chest. It didn't punch through him fully, but cracked his ribs and now he was on the ground in pain. The shooters fate was sealed when a soldier's stinger punched through the attacker's leg with an ecto blast before the swarm and began fighting men in white suits, the attackers being overrun quickly and being mangled savagely before stopping at Danny's order before fainting.

In their desperate attempt to get Danny to safety, the swarm grabbed his unconscious body and hurriedly went through the Ghost Portal before blowing it up, preventing the Guys in White from doing more damage. There, they were greeted by Danny's greatest ally, Clockwork, and Yeti named Frostbite who wished to help their Boss. With reluctance and cries of sadness, they gave him to the beastman and hoped for the best.

[hedgehog-moss]

Top 3 Annoying Translation Mistakes I’ve Read This Year (from least to most annoying):

Category I - lazy calques that let you feel the original text under the translation, not in a good way

(English -> French) In the French translation of Hugh Howey’s Sand (Outresable), the word “robe” at one point was mistranslated as... robe. Come on! In French that’s a dress, the English “robe” is what we call a robe de chambre. And it matters! The protagonist is knocking at his mother’s door and she opens it wearing a robe rather than clothes, which (in context) suggests that she was having sex; when you translate it as opening the door in a dress, the reader pictures her looking put together and wonders why her teenage son is feeling angrily embarrassed. Sure there will be more context clues in the rest of the paragraph, but your translation is not supposed to make it harder for the reader to form an accurate mental picture.

Category II - clunky sentences that make the text unpleasant or confusing to read

(I almost used the French translation of Julian Fellowes’ Past Imperfect as an example, but I suspect the original of being clunkily written as well. Still I gave a couple of examples of clumsy sentences at the end of my review that really should have been noticed and fixed.)

(Japanese -> French) Some sentences in the French translation of Masuji Ibuse’s 黒い雨 (Pluie noire) were so clumsy I had to re-read them several times, including the very first sentence. In English it is translated very neatly as: “For several years past, S. Shizuma had been aware of his niece Yasuko as a weight on his mind. What was worse, he had a presentiment that the weight was going to remain with him for still more years to come.”

In French we get this: “S. Shizuma avait depuis plusieurs années le cœur lourd au sujet de sa nièce Yasuko ; et pas seulement depuis plusieurs années, car il sentait bien que ce poids indicible doublerait, triplerait avec le temps.”

If the idea is that this past worry is likely to persist or worsen in the future, “et pas seulement depuis plusieurs années” is a confusing (and repetitive!) way of phrasing it. It suggests something that extends further into the past, not the future... In contrast, the Spanish translation uses the exact same “what was worse” phrasing as the English one: “Y, lo que era peor, tenía el presentimiento de que esta carga seguiría agobiándole indeciblemente aún durante muchos años.”

Another example (among many) where both the English and Spanish translations use the same simple phrasing while the French translator seems to get tangled up in her own syntax:

EN: “In the event, though, he proved to have shown more care than wisdom.”

SP: “Sea como sea, el caso es que demostró tener más prudencia que sabiduría.”

FR: “Or, ces doubles précautions avaient produit un effet en quelque sorte aussi stupide qu’elles avaient été avisées [...]” This character tried to do the wise / cautious thing and it resulted in something bad, I get it. But the English & Spanish translations are objectively neater and less syntactically muddled than “his double precautions produced an effect in some way as stupid as they had been wise.”

Category III (the worst) - mistranslations that actually influence the way the reader experiences the story or characters

(French -> English) The English translator of Valérie Perrin’s Trois (Three) seemed either confused by or not able to recognise a lot of French slang, which she translated literally. At one point the word “pisseuses”, a derogatory term for girls (yeah it comes from piss) is translated very literally as girls “who wet themselves.” It’s like if the English word “bitches” was translated as “female dogs” in another language where the term is neutral, instead of using a word with equivalent sexist connotations. The word ‘pisseuses’ here is part of a misogynistic character’s internal narration. He’s an adult man thinking of teenage girls as bitches; instead the inexplicable translation “girls who wet themselves” just leaves you baffled.

The same issue pops up again later on, when the same character thinks of an old woman as “la vieille bigote”—bigot means very religious in French, but here it’s not to be taken literally, it’s used as a generic derogatory term for an old woman. The English translation is “the pious old woman”—too literal ! It sounds almost respectful? Or at the very least neutral, when actually the male narrator is thinking of the woman as “this old hag.” Also their exchange had nothing at all to do with religion so you’re left confused as to how he came to think that she was pious.

It sounds like nitpicking but these are pretty big mistakes in that they not only make things confusing but also impact characterisation. You’re not supposed to turn a character’s negative thoughts into neutral ones. The translator does it again to a female character later on, this time with the opposite effect—making her less sympathetic. She is describing her life (married to a rich but controlling man) as “des vacances à perpétuité.” In English, her life becomes “a never-ending vacation”, thus erasing the very strong connotation of prison carried by the French phrase 'in perpetuity’. You could have found some phrasing around the idea of a “life sentence” maybe—we’re supposed to empathise with this character who consciously experiences her life as a gilded cage, and softening the phrase in the translation reduces the reader’s ability to do that by making it sound like this rich woman is just bored with her life of leisure. Sometimes even small mistranslations can end up having a significant impact on how the reader reacts to a story and its characters.

None of the above are awful translations if you take the book as a whole, but all four of these books are by best-selling authors so if they get so many poorly-translated words or sentences what hope is there for the rest...!

[pippuns]

Qiong ding disciples succeed in deaging SJ. YQY loses his mind in every direction they never knew he could be so mentally unwell

[PART 1]

[keshetchai]

As someone who enjoys religion blogging/discussions, I've come to realize that it's a good practice to be aware of the general signs/symptoms of religious-OCD thinking (aka scrupulosity), because if the conversation is taking on all the hallmarks of scrupulosity, it's actually a definitive sign that we cannot meaningfully and compassionately engage in a conversation about religion in a healthy way. I've actually had this play out a significant number of times online, and when I realized what it was, I also began to realize that the intrusive thoughts/obsessive and compulsive thinking are only ever fed by continuing the discussion with that person.

[[ Important edit to clarify why I am saying it's not healthy — made after I went back to look for more concrete facts about OCD or anxiety (I have GAD, not OCD, but many resources overlap since they're both anxiety disorders):

When Reassurance is Harmful — this explains how/why reassurance-seeking specifically about an OCD fear is a compulsive behavior, and engaging with reassurance-seeking interferes with recovery/management/treatment.

This table from the Anxiety Disorders Center lists key differences between Information Seeking and Reassurance Seeking.

This IOCDF page on Scrupulosity info for Faith Leaders identifies "symptom accommodation" as enabling. Two of the examples of doing this by participating in the OCD behavior are: "Engage in excessive conversation focused on if-then scenarios (e.g., "If I did this, then would X or Y happen? And what if Z was involved? How about W?")" And, "Repeatedly answering questions about ‘correct’ religious or faith practices."

That page also goes on to outline more info about reassurance seeking. "Although providing answers to (often simple!) questions may seem harmless, providing reassurance serves to maintain the anxiety disorder cycle." (This BMC psychiatry article cites a lot of related studies establishing this.)

The IOCDF page on What is OCD and Scrupulosity? ]]

Imo, the responsible thing to do is to recognize that (even if the other person hasn't outright stated it/isn't diagnosed)* the conversation is not about religion, it is about needing mental health support from professionals and experts. Talking to me, the layperson who enjoys chatting theology and my religion — is not only not helping, but is actively harmful. I'm not just talking about the person who I replied to today, either. Like I've said, I've seen this happen dozens of times in various online forums.

*[while I am against diagnosing strangers on the internet, it's important to realize A) lots of people don't know what Scrupulosity is, so it's possible they've never considered this is a mental health concern that could be treated, and that B) for the purposes of my concern, it doesn't matter if they actually have diagnosed OCD. The only thing that matters is that their thought-process causes them genuine distress/fear, and every response given to them seems to only incite new/additional distressing questions/thoughts, or further entrenches the original distress.]

Ultimately, any discussion aside from "you might want to speak to a mental health professional about scrupulosity OCD" seemingly puts me in the position of feeling as if I am being used for their self-harm. I hate that feeling. I do not want to be leverage for fear and pain. I have GAD, I despise the idea that I am making things worse.

No matter how much I love religious discussion, the answer in these cases is always "please reach out to an OCD specialist/mental health professional. I am not qualified to discuss this." And then to stop there. I have never once seen anyone stuck in this compulsive thought spiral be reassured or feel any better by hearing from someone else's approach to theology handled with things like empathy, compassion, logic, or even atheism. It doesn't matter what we say, how we say it, or how we relate to our own religion. The urge to engage in this kind of conversation in order to chat about religion is a sign that we are not equipped to help.

You can't have a conversation here, because intentionally or not, ten times out of ten, you are adding fuel to the fire. Just like people can't simply tell me something that would erase/talk me out of my ADHD/depression/anxiety disorder, you also cannot simply argue/reassure/persuade people out of scrupulosity. We should not try. We have a responsibility to consider that it's outright harmful to do so, and to disengage.

[msommers]

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