#and they're preventing me from exercising

[rabbivole]

i would like to stop feeling like i am going to have a heart attack thanks

[aropride]

covid's cool because you get it and you might not even know because you have no symptoms. and you might feel like you have a bad cold or the flu. and you might end up in the hospital or dead. And then after you'll either feel fine. or you'll feel kinda off for a few months. or you'll have years or a lifetime of dealing with a new/worsened disability/disabilities. or you'll die. and you have to gamble every time you go out or take off your mask whether you want to risk getting it or not. and also most of society has decided it's probably fine to risk it because surely it won't happen to them. of course they've had that nagging cough and trouble exercising for months now but that's not covid, it's just this weird cold going around. no they didn't take a covid test, it's probably not covid. no they're not going to wear a mask, they didn't test positive (because they didn't take a test). every day it's like, okay, i might get the Virus That Gives You Seven Disabilities today, and i might not, and absolutely nobody around me is doing anything to prevent anyone else from getting it anymore, because everyone wants to pretend it's not happening. that's really fine and normal.

[little-saw]

tips to caring for littles who suffer from:

emotional dysregulation, hyper empathy,

and harsh moodswings !!

• develop grounding techniques to bring your little back to earth when they spiral. (breathing exercises, hand squeezing, observation games, etc.)

• remind them that what they're feeling is only big right now, and will pass.

• offer reassurance and spend time with them. Do not get angry if your little is easily upset or agitated.

• if the source of the moodswing or dysregulation is removable, try to get your little or the cause away from the other.

• find distractions to help your baby cope. (tv, games, toys, coloring, etc.)

• offer to talk with them about their big feelings and / or listen.

• if they're comfortable with it, take over bigger tasks and set down rules to prevent harm. (Ex: earlier bedtimes, no exceptions.)

• show love towards your little, and communicate your feelings aswell.

• encourage your little to be open about their moodswings the moment they have them. Preventing further damage or fear for both parties.

• if your little is experiencing hyper empathy towards another party, assure them they're a good person for feeling on the other's behalf, but remind them that they're their own person.

• if your little is neglecting themselves for others, step in and stop them from doing so if safe.

As someone who experiences big emotions very quickly, and has symptoms of hyper empathy as well as bpd. I have a hard time distinguishing my emotions, I hope this post helps others like me ^^ feel free to add your own tips on!

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

hi, i wanted to ask what you think about those japanese zoo's training exercises were someone dresses up as an animal and pretends to have escaped and all that, are they effective? what do U.S zoo's do to train for things like that?

They look silly, but they're a real emergency drill! They force people to think through how they'd problem-solve in real time and in the physical space, which is a very different experience than just thinking about it.

There's no consistent requirement for emergency drills in the US federal regulations for zoos, but there is a contingency planning one. Facilities licensed by the USDA have to identify and create plans for addressing likely emergencies they may have to deal with, which is everything from like natural disasters to animal escapes. That's all done as paperwork and provided to the government to prove they've done it.

BUT. That doesn't mean that zoos and other animal facilities don't do more planning on their own. Some of the third-party accreditations (it might be all of them but I don't have the docs in front of me to confirm) require regular drills for all types of emergency scenarios.

Now there's a slight problem there - a real escape drill, run fully on grounds with real people and stand-in animal, interferes with the daily operations of the zoo. You might not have to physically shut all the guests into buildings during a practice leopard escape, but you do need them to not get in the way, and you don't want to scare people who think a drill is real, etc. So there's an alternate option.

US zoos frequently run emergency management drills as TTRGPs!

Like, they use a printed scale map of the zoo and roll dice to randomize the situation. This is absolutely recommended as a strategy by the Zoo and Aquariums All Hazard Partnership: there's a whole webpage about it, including instructions for the Drill Master.

There are in-person drills, of course, because you have to practice dealing with these problems in meatspace. But a lot of them are done tabletop! I cannot express the extent of my mirth when I first encountered this in the wild at a conference about a decade ago, when the idea was really taking off. It was Very Serious Zoo People on a Very Serious Topic about preventing Really Bad Things from happening... and then suddenly there was a d20 on the screen.

[alchemistc]

get by (with a little help from my friends)

Eddie's "Hey man." gets completely ignored when he answers the phone, which isn't entirely unusual, considering the man on the other end.

"I need you to talk me off a ledge."

Tommy sounds like he's gone three rounds already, and that's entirely possible. At this point, he's got the same steps as Buck does any time he feels like flying off the handle: phone a friend, and then another friend, and then talk to Buck about it. Eddie always likes it best when they just fucking talk to each other, but he can see the wisdom in asking for advice first. They're both reactive fucks who love each other way too much to be rational face to face, sometimes.

"Am I qualified to give advice on this subject, or is this gonna be another Spare Key Fiasco?"

Tommy chuffs from the other end of the phone. He still hates that Eddie had had a front row seat to that freakout.

"It wasn't a spare, Eddie, I had it specifically made for -."

"Yeah, that's my bad, dude, stop taking every opportunity to change the subject. What's up, man?"

There's a noise Eddie recognizes vaguely as the breathing exercises Buck had been explaining to him a few months ago. They both use them - Buck to prevent the leap to anger and defensiveness, Tommy to prevent... whatever his reactive habits are. The pair of them have been surprisingly light on details, since they got back together. Well. Surprising that Buck hasn't word vomited all of Tommy's idiosyncrasies, at some point.

It's going on a year since he's seen Tommy in person, but he can picture the exact curmudgeonly expression he's probably pulling right now. "I bought a ring, last week."

Only about a month behind Buck. They're getting better about the whole pacing thing. Eddie's been sworn to secrecy, so this is gonna be a fucking minefield to navigate.

"That's great, man. When are you gonna ask him?" Buck has a spreadsheet already. Two, actually, if you're counting the Worst Case Scenario tab Eddie'd caught a peek at when Buck shared his screen instead of ending the video call they'd been on.

That's going in the speech whether Buck likes it or not.

"You remember that ledge I was talking about?"

Of course. Of course that's what he's worried about. Of course Eddie's been dialed in to either talk him down or throw out a rope and wrangle his ass off a cliff side.

Man's stolen helicopters, evaded military and FBI and earned medals for his reckless bravery, and yet the idea of settling down with a man he loves more than the entire world and flying is rattling him enough to need backup.

"Who was your first call?"

Tommy's huff is fairly telling. Sal, then. Eddie's only met him once and he wasn't his biggest fan, but Buck loves the guy. Says sitting between the two old friends is better than watching a UFC match. He's got weird priorities, Buck does.

("They're so mean, Eddie, you'd think they were mortal enemies, but Deluca, like, gets Tommy. Do you think he'll help me with the contingency plan?")

From what Eddie can remember, they'd only reconnected about six months ago, but they'd fallen back into their aggressively combative friendship easily, according to Buck. Eddie's of the opinion that Tommy reached out to Sal Deluca specifically to combat Buck's intense positivity when he finally cottoned on to the fact that Buck considered himself a permanent fixture in Tommy's life.

"Sal told me to woman up. And swap the ring out for a leash."

Yeah. Eddie's not sold on Sal Deluca. Considering they're most likely gonna have to plan some sort of joint bachelor party across state lines sometime over the course of the next year, Eddie's going to have to woman up himself.

"Not to make everything even worse than Deluca, but what the hell are you hoping I can help with? My only proposal came about three days after the pee stick showed two lines."

Tommy blows out a breath. Not the breathing exercises, this time. Eddie can almost see the hand he's dragging down his face, nose folding and bouncing back when the hand gets to his mouth and hangs there, for a moment. "I've proposed before," he murmurs.

Well. There that is. Eddie had definitely forgotten about that little hiccup.

"I mean, it's not like you're gonna propose, sit on it for a few years, and then decide you actually don't like dick, right?"

"Your support is overwhelming," he deadpans, and the line goes quiet. For about forty seconds, Eddie stares at the time on the call tic up and up. "But no, that's not the issue."

"No offense, buddy, but I have no idea what the issue is. He's gonna say yes. It's gonna be great. He'll cry for like an hour and then for a few weeks he'll tell every random stranger he meets that his fiance is a pilot for the LAFD." If Tommy swears him to secrecy, too, he's gonna have to get creative. See if he can coordinate a joint proposal without either one of them cottoning on.

"You ever been gun shy before?" Tommy asks, in that roundabout way he has of trying to explain the thoughts inside his own head.

He tried. He failed. He hurt someone. He doesn't want to do it again.

"Yeah, but like - besides the fact that you're attracted to and in love with Buck, they're...very different people." He'd only met Abby once. Hadn't particularly cared for her, on account of the whole leaving his best friend in limbo for months, and the Making His Best Friend Act More Out Of Pocket Than Usual At A Scene.

"Both with amazing hair, though," Tommy jokes, and then groans. "I'm going to gouge my eyeballs out with a teaspoon."

"Yeah, don't do that. You think Evan Buckley's going to decipher that as 'Lets get hitched'?"

"I resent the idea that you think that I'd use those words."

"Apologies. You gonna quote a movie he's never seen?"

"It's easy to recycle when he thinks they're all my witty rejoinders."

"He knows when you're quoting something. Tommy, your whole body vibrates, and you get this deranged smile. You are many things, my friend, but subtle is not one of them."

Christ, Tommy has a type. Drawn to whatever asshole can slice him to the bone while keeping up with his brand of sardonic banter. Eddie doesn't enjoy the new knowledge that he's basically the Buck-adjacent version of Deluca.

How the hell had he ended up with the human equivalent of a socially anxious Great Dane?

There's an easy solution here. Is it a violation of the bro code to tell Tommy to just sit on it? Carry the ring around everywhere and wait til the time is right? That's not a hint, is it?

"You're trying to distract me," Tommy observes. "What do you know?"

"I know that despite the fact that the two of you could fill Michigan Stadium with your insecurities and diametrically opposed capital I issues, this is gonna work itself out in a really good way."

"Eddie."

"Tommy."

"He already bought the ring, didn't he?" There's his typical bemused sigh whenever Buck does something that he, personally, finds adorably annoying. Annoyingly adorable. Something. Eddie doesn't know; he still doesn't quite get them. They work, and that's all that really matters, at the end of the day.

Sometimes they work because Eddie, Maddie, and Sal Deluca, for some reason, can offer the right support and the right advice at the right time.

"For legal and personal reasons I'm invoking my right to remain silent."

"Are the personal reasons to do with wanting your ankles intact?"

"I might take a vow of silence, actually."

Tommy's quiet for a long, long time. Long enough that Eddie has to check and make sure the asshole hasn't hung up on him.

"Is his plan going to cause any permanent damage to county property? We've both got priors." Stealing government property, evading police and military, technically domestic terrorism. All wiped from their records because they both have main character syndrome, so exactly zero actual prior offenses.

"I don't recall saying anything about a plan."

"That vow sure has legs to stand on," Tommy muses, and Eddie has to fight the urge to blow a raspberry.

"You can ask one yes or no question that I retain the right to not answer. If it'll help you walk yourself back off that ledge."

Tommy takes long enough forming the question that Eddie gets through three of the syllabuses Chris' school is requiring him to confirm he's read. He hates this damn school, but Chris loves it.

"Should I start carrying the ring with me everywhere, or can I assume Evan will at least make it clear we have plans, when he decides he's ready?"

That's not a yes or no question.

"That's not a yes or no question."

"Should the ring be on my person at all times, yes or no?" Eddie can't tell if he's throwing the bitchy tone in for a laugh, or because he's actually annoyed. For all Eddie knows, he could still be a little prickly about the fact that he's having to seek out the competition for advice on his love life. Buck says they're over that, but sometimes Eddie's not sure.

Sometimes Buck still encourages him to lean into it a bit because apparently "The sex is mind-blowingly hot, Eddie."

"You'll probably be fine without it at work," Eddie hedges.

"Probably is not a yes or a no."

"I never told you how I was gonna answer."

Eddie hates that he knows Buck's gonna get laid tonight on the back of Tommy's frustration with Eddie.

"So. How's that cliff looking, from over there?"

Tommy's put-upon sigh is edging on overkill. "What cliff? It's plains and valleys from here."

Eddie's well aware that Tommy can dig himself trenches a mile deep just to have a ledge to jump from. He has a good feeling about this, though.

"Let him romance you, for once, dude."

That shouldn't be such a polarizing statement, for the man who's been desperate to be loved almost as much as Evan Buckley himself, but Tommy has a nasty fucking habit of shooting himself in the foot whenever Buck makes it a point to take care of Tommy back.

Tommy groans. "None of this makes it to the speech."

"Yeah, it's absolutely going in the speech, man."

[thegoldenwager]

I yap about Forever + Falling with you

Forever being the end song to murder drones- and its lyrics being what they are

gives me the impression Murder Drones was a big love story about opening up and trust hidden under mounds of comedy and violence

And I dont mean that it ACTUALLY is, its more just.. a silly little feeling I get when i listen to it

Theres something about the song thats so... cozy? So like, softly spoken. A very hummable melody from one lover to another.

also falling with you, like what the fuck

never in my life have I felt a track was so carefully crafted- and prepared, carved out for two specific characters in one specific moment.

She made the choice to sacrifice herself- for him. In her eyes it was the end and if at the end of everything she could guarantee the life of one person it was going to be the one she loves, she didnt know what would be at the other end,

The thing is, he wanted to be there for her. Even when they're knocking on deaths door, he needs to be there.

Its like trust fall exercise, except the focus isnt on 'catch me' cause they'd never let the other fall,

its about making sure they dont fall when youre not looking. It hurts both parties, to crash without warning and to see the one you love fall

I *love* that they dont speak here. She looks to the side, shifting her glances before looking at him.

An unspoken guilt ridden apology.

The response he chooses?

forgiveness,

Even if the result of her actions hurt him- her intentions were good and meant to be entirely in favor of him

And in this moment, with their current history and with a yet to be seen future, he forgives her,

Cause at the very least, they're together again. He could save her.

And her look just, screams thank you to me.

Thank you for forgiving me, saving me-

for everything :) /ref

lighthearted preparation for whats to come :)

legitimately, what she says, reiterating herself "die mad bitch"

knowing theyre heading into the end of the world to prevent it?? Theyre going off to the fucking trenches together, key word this time being together

And then the horrible unexpected !

Uzi is ripped away from N, confronted with what her home has become, the universe is practically screaming at her to fix it, pushing her towards the end without mercy

But shes not doing it alone, she cant do it alone, not again, not this time

And he wouldnt let her

The universe could endlessly attempt to wield its cosmic grasp to push these two apart but itd never work, itd never end with them alone

Their love- their pure devotion to each other,

is so celestial in its own right

Not super related to my ramble but i love that in them becoming official (I will not call this a confession, N definitely confessed the previous episode)

Uzis so.. wagh.. her eyes.

That trademark look of panic or worry- I mean what would you expect from the black sheep of the colony? Being excluded on the daily, left to your own abandoned devices?? The reassurance she was requesting just, ughh.. my heart...

and the way. He fucking looks at her

Its so, soft. He knows she has not a thing to worry about. His heart is completely and utterly hers. Where most would die for their love, he lives for her.

The universe would be dammed to ever try and separate pure unbridled love like this ever again

ERM< ANYWAY that was super gay ew idk why im like. obsessed with their relatinshuio ahhajfhdgjbsjhfm someone blow me up

[themotleymirage]

I just wanna talk for a second about the contrasting parallels between the wizard Keen and Eioghorain. And yes, I do mean both contrast and parallel, because despite occupying very different places in the world of Umora, both characters are presented to us, the viewers, as eminently dangerous from minute one of their introduction. We're given this information through a six year old Suvi's perception of Eioghorain and present-day Eursulon's insight to Keen, so of course both are biased views (the music reinforces both these ideas though, oh god does Keen's theme put me on edge and Eioghorain's makes me want to hide). Through Steel, the story has repeated that Eioghorain is a threat specifically to the Empire's plans, and Keen is presented as an unsettling enforcer of those same goals as a member of the prince's retinue. As different as the characters and their wildly contrasted positions of power are, the parallels in the way they're presented to Suvi specifically caught my attention.

Its important that only after Suvi begins to untangle her justification machine from the Empire's imperial goals/practices do we get to meet Keen and Eioghorain. Keen was a previously unknown player on the field, but from the moment of his introduction is described as inhuman. Eursulon instinctually identifies him as evil, and Suvi at the very least finds Keen unsettling. Eioghorain, in contrast, has been a threatening presence looming over the narrative since the Children's Adventure, someone dangerous that was going to reemerge eventually. He's called monstrous over and over. Both characters are deadly, but Eioghorain has been built into a nemesis figure for Suvi, the alleged murderer of her parents, and Keen is a bastard who's nonetheless on the same side as Suvi.

Going into this episode with that limited knowledge of Keen and the baggage of Eioghorain's deeply felt impact in Suvi's world, it's incredibly pointed that we get Keen's precise violence first, and directed at Ame. The member of the trio least equipped for combat of any sort, whom Keen identified as the easiest one to trap, and who he plainly acknowledges is not his target. With Ame completely at his mercy, Keen still makes very real threats to Ame and the Fox's lives in order to procure Suvi. Keen is brutal in a way emblematic of the Empire wizards' emphasis of logic and intellectual rigor, brought to their full might by a person with the institutional authority to wield both his own and the Empire's power however he wishes. It's very specifically the kind of insidious violence only an institutional power structure could exercise. Meanwhile, Eioghorain's interaction with Suvi begins far more violently, but the initial brutality of their encounter feels more honest. Straightforward murder from one side of a war to another, a bloody animal violence that is terrifying but somehow less horrifying. And then to have Eioghorain tell Suvi the unvarnished truth as he knows it, to be the first person in the know to be entirely honest not only about the inner workings of the Citadel but also about his own actions and motivations? Incredible.

Every episode has advanced the erosion of Suvi's justification machine and belief in the institution that raised her. The monster from her childhood being the one to both further shatter those systems for Suvi and encourage action toward making right the wrongs she sees in the world around her, while the representative of the empire Suvi has dedicated her life to threatens people she cares for and prevents her from reaching kidnapped children is such an interesting way to galvanize Suvi into her first truly treasonous act.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

hey, so like. I'm a vaguely sex-indifferent asexual who's only had sex a handful of times but like. I had sex with someone who wanted me to ride them once and I could not for the life of me work out how the fuck you're supposed to move to make that both pleasurable and to not accidentally slip off your partner's dick and just.

"bounces on dick like I'm riding him to half canter."

my dude you have no idea how much this has clicked into my head as oh of course that's how that'd work. thank you??? idk when I'll ever ride someone's dick again but now I know how to make it way more enjoyable.

LMAOOOOOOOOOO there's a reason horse girls are all fucking sluuuuuuuuuuts (i say as a former horsehirl and current, proud slut)

People will sell you all manner of workouts to "make you better in bed" but fundamentally the best workout for sexual stamina I've ever had was daily horseback riding back when i worked as a stable hand. That shit will make you ride dick/strap like a motherfucking god

Also: it's a cheap and dirty trick for almost everything sex related, but yall, I'm begging my fellow three-holed sex havers to start doing kegel exercises with weighted aids until you can literally just orgasm command because I've had to do pelvic floor exercises my entire life and one time I rode dick so hard,so long, and so good, that the dick came dry on the last round and this was in no small part because I am capable of massaging the dick on purpose from the inside out baybeeeeeee. You know that trick people do with blowjobs where they put the condom on with their mouth? I can do that with my pussy folks, and trust me, they fuckin NOTICE the quality.

Not to mention, once your pelvic floor is in real good shape, basically anything can feel pleasurable because it's less about WHAT IS HAPPENING IN YOUR VAG and more about you physically inducing orgasm via muscle manipulation. It's the great equalizer of sex and orgasms. I have a lot of neuroses that mean I struggle with orgasm broadly, and especially on my own, but kegels have made it so that I am "sensitive" enough to orgasm real fast as soon as a partner whose movement I am not personally responsible for gets involved.

If anyone has seen that post about "none of your deserve to joke about pillow princesses until you respect the skill", this is kinda what that's talking about. Not that it's MY preference (I am not a pillow princess but I've fucked some and 😍😍😍😍) but I am very capable of laying back and making my top cum **no matter what they're doing** or if it should actually work out that way, because I understand how to perform kegels during sex to A) prevent dick/strap from fully popping out when things get a lil too wet and wild, B) "stroke" the dick/strap in an intentional grip and movement like with a handjob but in my pussy, my anus, or my mouth/throat as well, C) make sure I'm not getting so tight the dick can't keep doing its thing (less of an issue for straps but you fuck a glass strap for 3hrs and tell me how you feel about the idea that you can't get too tight on one for it to work right), and D) how to rotate my hips to adjust depths of thrusts to a top's preference for reaching or holding off from orgasm. That takes skill motherfucker, don't tell me a pillow princess doesn't work hard, that hole is premium grade have some respect and eat it out like it deserves.

.....I've gotten off topic here.

Anyway, I always HATED riding dick/strap because it's just not my thing you know, and like even now it is the worst of the positions for my personal pleasure. But you just can't beat the look on a power bottom's face when you pillow princess them from above like a goddamn succubus, and it turns out that horseback riding will teach you how to do just that while absolutely never once acknowledging that half the point of a morning ride for the horses is rubbing a few out in the saddle where no one can judge you but you and your god

[vigilskept]

👀👀👀about the meredith taking cullen's place in DAI

listen............ i stand by the fact that cullen rutherford whose highest rank in the templar order has been as second to meredith is by NO means qualified to be commander of an army.

that's literally never been his job!! and the fact that he's cold turkey quitting lyrium before he even starts on the job............. cassandra you are insane. what the fuck. the other day @ikarons and i went down a rabbit hole yes and-ing each other about a worldstate where u could throw warden loghain into the job in his stead and like.... despite the political clusterfuck that would inevitably result (he's going to invade orlais. u can't prevent this.) he's STILL more qualified for that job.

but anyway. all that is beside the point. my reasoning for throwing meredith in the position is less about qualification (still more command experience than cullen even if it's civil command rather than military tbf) and more about the fact that cullen's entire arc boils down to "i should have seen something was wrong with meredith sooner :("

i've sketched out some rough thoughts on how i'd adapt his arc for thea trevelyan's worldstate (& you can do something interesting if you lean into the solythal/andrastian insanity of it all) but honestly the whole exercise just made me think "wow. wouldn't it be crazy if we put the person actually in command in the hot seat instead?"

and it is immediately so much more compelling.

she Really Did All That. red lyrium-whatever. she'd own all of it, the red lyrium didn't do much other than deepen the paranoia that was already there. she turned kirkwall into a tinderbox to keep the city safe and it achieved nothing but set the city on fire. she by no means trusts mages more after the fact, but it doesn't change the fact that she was plainly unfit for command at the end of it all. she has to reckon with all of that in real time while being put in a situation that is arguably just as bad a pressure cooker as kirkwall was at the end.

why might cassandra recruit her then?

well how does it look for the chantry if the knight-commander of kirkwall is dishonourably discharged from the order? it's a disgrace. they might as well fly a white flag and let the mages state their own terms for peace. they'd have no means of restoring the circles again after that. it would be surrender. however much of a "reformer" justinia may be, she was by no means prepared for that outcome. she sends leliana to kirkwall to threaten a damn exalted march on the city to prevent that outcome!

now a "repentant" former knight-commander meredith who has submitted to the authority of the chantry once more........ that has more promise, politically speaking.

how you'd spin it to the templars and mages would depend obviously. for the templars, you'd want them to see it as them more closely aligning with their order. for the mages, you'd want to convince them that it's a sign of the chantry's collective repentance for the "excesses" of the circle that meredith has been moved out of her old command while she & the chantry seek a new path forward. at the same time, it is a warning that they could just as easily choose to return to a far harsher order than they're prepared for, should the mages fail to choose compromise.

[dreamwavesexploringreality]

NIGHT IN THE LIBRARY

Niragi Suguru x YN. Pre-Borderlands.

TW: Bullying

This text contains themes of bullying, including physical and verbal abuse, intimidation, and emotional distress.

The sepulchral silence of the late-night university library was the only thing that seemed capable of soothing Niragi on those days when darkness seized his mind.

He had dreamt of the day he could leave for university ever since the first beating. He remembered it well: one of his classmates in high school had demanded he do his math homework during recess. Niragi had always liked math, enjoying the ability to solve problems logically and coherently, without involving his soul or heart in the process, just right or wrong, without half-measures or personalism. That day he focused on doing the homework of the taller boy who had tripped him in the hallways more than once, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't finish the last exercise before the bell signaling the end of recess rang like a sinister omen. With trembling hands, he handed the notebook to the boy who, accompanied by his friends, laughed at Niragi's trembling hands.

"I thought I asked you to finish my homework," the bully began, a sinister look on his face as he carefully reviewed the three handwritten pages.

"I-I... didn't have time to finish, but they're all done except the last one," Niragi said, looking at the ground and nervously adjusting his glasses.

"All done except the last one means it's not finished," the bully pushed Niragi to the ground with a strong shove, then turned to his friends with laughter. "Didn't you guys tell me he was the biggest nerd in the class? He can't even do that right," they laughed in unison.

Niragi still remembered the pain he had felt that day from the multiple punches and kicks they had given him while he writhed on the ground, and that was just the beginning of his hell. From that day on, no matter how hard he tried to avoid his abusers, they seemed to find a sick pleasure in making the boy suffer.

When he finally managed to leave high school, graduating with honors, he enrolled in the university farthest from his hometown to study Computer Science, and he did so without looking back or reconsidering it twice. Still, there were days when the hallways of the faculty seemed longer and narrower than usual, and the few people who might be there felt suffocating and intimidating to him. Niragi spent days looking over his shoulder, on alert, preventing any subtle movement that would make him jump and his breath catch in his throat.

That's why the library at night, mostly empty, was the best option for those days when darkness threatened to take over his mind.

YN's soft steps, contrasting with Niragi's rhythmic typing on his laptop, disturbed the cocoon of peace surrounding Niragi.

"Do you mind if I sit here with you?" the girl whispered, a stack of psychology books in her arms.

Niragi looked her up and down and remained silent for a few seconds. He had met the girl on one of his many nights in the library; they were usually the only ones in the room, and for some reason, the girl had taken this as an invitation to approach and introduce herself to the Computer Science student.

"Sure, it's not like I own the place," the boy said, returning to his work. He didn't intend to sound blunt or rude, but his instinct, honed after years of abuse, warned him that it was best to keep his distance.

If the girl noticed this, she didn't show it. She sat down carefully, dragging the chair and opening one of her books, immediately starting to read.

The constant typing on the computer was all that could be heard in the library until, suddenly, YN lowered the book, closing it softly and looking at Niragi boldly. The student noticed the girl's eyes on him and stopped typing.

"You've been here every night this week," YN began. "You look exhausted. Have you slept at all?"

Niragi didn't answer immediately. His conversations with the girl had never been longer than a brief greeting, sometimes just a nod.

"It's this project. It's demanding a lot from me," Niragi hesitated, torn between the instinct to evade and the fragile thread of trust he felt between himself and YN. He had always been good at hiding his true feelings.

"Mmm," YN hummed, nodding with understanding. "I don't know much about computers, but maybe I can help," she said.

This earned her a subtle laugh from the man.

"If you don't know about computers, what makes you think you can help me?" he said, a hint of mockery in his voice.

"I'm sure I can't help you with your project," YN laughed as if she hadn't noticed the boy's teasing. "But I think I can help you in other ways. I can keep you company and even give you conversation during your free time. There are studies that claim you can be more productive if you work in a good environment... accompanied," she asserted softly, as if reading aloud a passage from one of her books.

YN's unbreakable empathy and genuine interest in his well-being caught Niragi's attention, causing him to open his eyes slightly in surprise.

YN, as a psychology student, had managed to see during the time she had spent with Niragi a vulnerability beyond his reserved behavior, and she had chosen to act as a silent pillar of support in the midst of the internal turmoil threatening to engulf him. She found him a curious character and longed for the day he would trust her enough to open up instead of her pressuring him for details.

After a moment of uncertainty, Niragi managed to articulate the words that wore down his defenses and opened up to a vulnerability he had never shown:

"That sounds good."

YN drew a smile on her face, and a flash of happiness crossed her gaze, squeezing her heart as she understood that her study partner finally seemed to be starting to trust her. In a burst of confidence, she extended her hand to gently take his. Niragi's heart warmed by YN's genuine compassion.

"Coffee. My treat," she said, quickly getting up while still holding her partner's hand, urging him to get up too.

"That sounds good," Niragi repeated, mentally scolding himself for repeating the exact same words as before.

YN laughed softly, and a genuine warmth spread through Niragi's tired body.

The couple left the library, still holding hands, their steps resonating in the quiet of the night and a promise of brighter days floating in the air.

Until that fateful day, of course, when the fireworks lit up the Tokyo sky...

¿Part 2?

© 2024 [@dreamwavesexploringreality]

[midnightcinderella]

People who would suffer at NRC

Each dorm has at least one of these students and god help them. This is very self-indulgent and each trait applies to me. If you relate, then rip to the both of us.

No proof-reading, we rawdog this shit. Word count: ~1300 Notes: no gendered pronouns for reader. mentions of ADHD, depression, and anxiety. mentions of illness. no romantic relationships

Heartslabyul

People with ADHD. Rip to us fr.

You'd forget at least a handful of rules a day, but it's really not your fault. Riddle better get off your case istg.

The ones who are more devoted to remaining productive make big colorful signs all over the damn place.

In their own rooms would be stuff like a box that says "keys and wallet go here" or a sign by the door with a checklist of what they need before they go, like homework or textbooks.

There are signs in common areas, too. They'll say stuff like curfew times or reminders of jobs that need to be done around the dorm.

There's always backlash if Riddle tries to take them down for being an eyesore because not only do they help ADHD students remember what needs to be done but students without ADHD, too. No sane person is gonna be thinking about feeding flamingos 24/7.

Savanaclaw

People with asthma. Place is dusty as shit. And hot. And humid at times.

I'm surprised the beastman students haven't taken any measure to seal off the inside of the dorm to prevent and from getting in. Guess everyone doesn't mind inhaling dust straight into their lungs.

Not to mention regular exercise is a dorm-wide tradition. Shoutout to my fellow mile walkers <3

If you have asthma and a dander/dust allergy, I'd just drop out tbh.

People who easily overheat/sweat. Double rip to us.

Get ready to go back and forth with your dormmates about smelling bad after sweating. It's a common occurrence. Someone sasses you, you sass back, and you're friends again 3 minutes later.

Everyone will think you're dying when you're dripping sweat after some stretches outside. No, you're not tired, you're just hot.

Octavinelle

People who are bad at math/bad with money. Listen.

The dorm isn't full of people who are as business minded as Azul, but there are students that offer accounting help for a fee. Negotiate that fee for the love of god.

Thankfully, you won't be scammed out of house and home because:

(1) it's generally frowned upon to scam people within Octavinelle; you don't hurt one of your own. It's about loyalty.

(2) someone is likely to take pity on you and will throw you a bone, telling you about a huge sale or where to find good job opportunities.

People who are gullible. Once again, double rip.

And once again, thank the lucky stars that loyalty is such a big thing here so you might be tricked into doing someone's job for them like mopping the Lounge, but nothing that would hurt you too badly.

If a study partner tries to feed you false information for shiggles, that'll get shut down real quick by another student. If your grades go down, then the whole dorm goes with you.

Good thing that doesn't happen often, and Azul offers his study guides for a highly discounted price to his own.

Scarabia

People who don't do well with sudden changes in temperature. Man, listen.

Hellishly hot during the day and even more hellishly cold at night. Dante would be thrilled.

God forbid you have any athletic activities close to sunset because you'll have to shower off that sweat quick before you freeze to death.

If anyone has a problem with the sound of the hairdryer after sundown, they're just gonna have to deal with it or risk catching your inevitable cold.

Speaking of, if sudden changes in temperature make you sick, double rip. I know your pain.

Kalim may not be able to come see you in person, but if he finds out you're sick, he'll send meds and some warm food. If that food was made by Jamil, then you owe him one.

You don't wanna owe him one.

If you need to leave your room after sundown, you're going to do it wrapped up with a blanket over your head. If someone mistakes you for a ghoul, that's their own problem.

Pomefiore

People with depression. Listen. Someone without depression could find it hard to keep such a strict regimen day in and day out; do not expect too much out of us.

If you think that means you're getting out of it, though, you'd be wrong.

Group accountability is a thing here. If you need help sticking to your routine, you're getting it. You can't refuse.

You're all going to be beautiful together, goddammit.

If that chronic fatigue be hittin ya, you might get a pass for a few steps of your routine. But if a particularly caring dormmate decides you have to do the full routine and straight up does it for you, lol.

Depending on how you view that sort of help, it might be really nice. Or maybe a little humiliating.

The dorm kitchen is only going to have healthy ready-made snacks. So if it's a day where you can't cook or go all the way to the cafeteria, that is what you're working with. Either that or you crawl your way over the the Shop for a candy bar.

Ignihyde

People who struggle with technology. Yes there are young people who aren't great with technology. We exist. Mind your business.

No matter how many classes you take teaching you how to use MagExcel, it never sticks for long. Even if you pass the exams, all your knowledge leaves to go buy milk by the time the week is over.

You're gonna need to interrupt people's gaming sessions to ask for help. It may annoy them, but you're doing it anyway because you refuse the reinvent the wheel 12 times.

People who prefer paper over screens. Call me old fashioned but staring at screens all day Hurts My Eyes.

You'd get physical copies of your textbooks if you could, but those free pdfs your classmates pass around are too tempting to pass up. They're free, for god's sake.

You also might be limited to board games on game nights. They're not bad, but there's not a whole lot you can do with them. You're a wiz at Cards Against Reality tho.

Every so often Ignihyde has a dorm-wide game night where everyone sits around in the common room with their headphones in, playing their own games. Together.

Though the board game players are in the next room. Oddly enough, they're the rowdiest of the bunch, and it sounds like they have the most fun by the way they're yelling and cheering.

You have seen some nerd fights start over a game of Ichi.

Diasomnia

People who have anxiety. One, Lilia is a menace. Two, your housewarden is the Malleus Draconia. Meep.

Whether it's Lilia or Malleus you run into, it feels like your heart will explode at any time.

Not to mention it's so dark in and outside of the building for no good reason. What's a fella gotta do to get some fucking sunlight in here? You're sick of worrying about what could be behind every corner.

You once wondered if Malleus needed a UV/heat lamp, but knew better than to ask. That doesn't mean you're not curious, though.

People who dislike loud sounds. I don't think I have to explain this one.

At first you thought that staying near Silver meant that you'd be staying away from Sebek, but that wasn't the case and you were at a loss as to what to do.

Then you tried going in the other direction whenever you saw Malleus, but all that did was send Sebek after you personally, asking very loudly why you did not want to be around Lord Malleus.

At one point, you got sick of his shit and muzzled him via magic. Then Malleus showed up and you were all oh shit. But then all he did was chuckle about how you were getting along so well. You took that to mean he wouldn't ever stop you from muzzling Sebek.

You were right.

[thebreakfastgenie]

What the past few years has revealed to me is that many online leftists are just as illiterate about their government as anyone else. And that many people don’t understand anything about democracy, and probably think it means “king who does all the work but is called a president and I don’t have to do anything to make it better but it’s always everyone else’s fault.”

Yep. It's really frustrating. You always want to believe the people on the left who care about the things you care about are informed and know how the government works. And some of them do! There are leftists doing the work who are smart and dedicated. Of course most of them are too busy to be online all day, so that's not who you usually see online. What drives me crazy is the hostility you get sometimes when you try to explain things. Like simply describing how the system works is automatically agreeing with every aspect or something.

I know it's an exercise in futility but the reason I've done so many long posts and responses explaining how the government works is that there's an idealist inside me that thinks maybe one person will see my explanation and gain some better understanding. That's worth something to me.

So many people, whether they realize it or not, want a benevolent dictator. But that doesn't work. We have all of history to prove it. There are a lot of corny cliches like "democracy is a verb" and "a republic, if you can keep it" but it's true! This is even cornier but I think about that Spider-Man line "with great power comes great responsibility" and I think with great freedom comes great responsibility. If you want to live in a free and democratic society you have to do a little bit of work to maintain it. It's not even that much work!

I think a lot of people also want to believe there's a magic system that exists that prevents bad things from ever happening and you never have to do any work ever again. But that doesn't exist. You have to do the dishes every day for the rest of your life. You can get a dishwasher and that can remove some of the nastier parts but you still have to load and unload it. There is no system on earth that's bad-actor-proof. If you let malicious people into positions of power, they're going to do bad things no matter how many checks and balances you have. One of the checks comes from we the people. We get to pick our leaders! We can just not elect malicious actors! Democracy is a system that requires tremendous faith in the public to act responsibly. The last few years have proven that that faith is often misplaced, and it sucks. I choose to believe we can do better because I have to if I want to get out of bed in the morning.

[sage-nebula]

For those who favor the "Friede is perfectly fine, he's just laying low to work behind the scenes" theory, I ask you to please do the following:

Think of someone you love.

I don't mean someone you just like a lot, or someone you are fond of. Think of someone you love. Someone you feel safe around, no matter the circumstances. Someone whose mere presence brings you joy. Someone who, even when they exasperate or annoy you, that annoyance is still tinged by fondness because yes, they are being annoying, but they're also being them, and you love them. Someone who has changed your life for the better, someone who makes your life brighter, better, simply by being in proximity to you. Someone who makes you happy, makes you warm, makes you safe, makes you feel that life is worth living because no matter how hard things get, at least they're there, being them. Someone you really, truly love.

Are you thinking of that person? Good. Now imagine that they've died.

Imagine getting the news that an accident took place, and that they are now dead. They're gone, forever, and you didn't even get to say goodbye. In a worst case scenario, you saw this happen, and were powerless to do anything to stop it. This person that you love with your whole entire heart, who made the world brighter for you, has been ripped away from you, violently and without warning. You will never see them again. You will never speak to them again. There is nothing you are capable of doing which will bring that person back into your life. You have to instead go on without their warmth, their laughter, their love.

As you sit with that, as you grapple with that pain, ask yourself: How would you feel if, after a year of dealing with that unyielding avalanche of grief, you learned that not only were they alive, but they could have contacted you at any time and yet deliberately chose not to?

I'm not sure if this thought exercise I have proposed is enough to get across the all-consuming agony that grief over a loved one causes. It has been ten years since my platonic soulmate died in my arms, and that still remains the worst night of my life. I still cry when I think about her. And she is not the only one I've lost; I lost a dear friend to suicide eight years ago, and that grief, too, still aches inside me, the "what if I had done [x]" sometimes skittering around my brain even though I know there's nothing I could have realistically done to prevent it. Grief is not just sadness; grief is life-altering, brain chemistry-changing misery. Grief is a form of trauma, and doubly-so if you were there to witness the event as Orio, Liko, Roy, Dot, and Cap were.

So we have to ask ourselves: What would it do to the crew of the Brave Asagi if they learned that the grief they felt for over a year was for nothing? That they grieved their dear friend, whom some of them thought they saw die right in front of them, for no reason? That Friede was alive all along, and he just chose not to tell them? He chose to let them grieve him. He chose to let them endure that misery? What would it do to them to learn that this person that they loved with all their hearts chose to let them suffer?

And what would it do to Friede's character, to say that he is the type of person who would do that?

Because there is no reason good enough to justify it.

"He was laying low because the RVTs are seen as Public Enemy #1" -- they are being seen that way regardless of whether he is alive or dead. The only difference is, now they are being seen that way without him by their side, and with the grief of believing that he is lost to them forever.

"There are things that he can only do on his own" -- This is an entire series predicated on partnership and friendship. It is not believable at all that there are things that he would only be able to do without the rest of the crew, at least to the level of "it's better that they endure the grief of my death than to let them in on the fact that I am alive and OK."

"He is getting help from Amethio" -- While it would be believable that he would ask Amethio to join the RVTs, and it is not believable that he would enlist Amethio's help and not also pull the RVTs into it -- or again, at least inform them that he is alive and OK.

"Well then why can Amethio be laying low" -- Because Amethio is a character who has been established to want to go solo in the name of protecting others previously (see: when he tried to fire Zir and Conia). Friede is the opposite. Friede brought the RVTs together in the first place and has been established to be a person who cares deeply about the feelings of others.

I agree that jokes about Friede appearing and saying, "Did I forget to mention I'm alive?" are funny. But they are funny as jokes, as shitposts. For that to happen in canon . . . in my opinion, it would be unforgivable. If I was made to feel grief over someone I loved, only to find out a year or so later that they were alive all along and just didn't tell me, I would not be able to forgive them for putting me through that. It's tantamount to stabbing someone in the heart and saying, "My bad!" afterward. It's callous behavior. It's a heartless action.

The only way they could pull off Friede being peachy keen this entire time is if he actually had notified everyone off-screen and we just weren't told . . . but even then, he presumably still wouldn't have notified the kids or Cap (or else Liko wouldn't have painful flashbacks to his "death", Cap wouldn't be with Roy), and it'd be a very hard sell to believe that the adults would leave the crew disbanded without him.

Since Friede has not contacted the RVTs for over a year, it has to be because he can't -- because he physically or mentally cannot do it. Otherwise, at least in my opinion, he'll be doing something unforgivable that truly assassinates his character, and it will honestly ruin the show for me.

[deepinthegroves]

shifting exercise (pt. 2) ✧˖°

answering for my spiderverse reality (when i shift in).

i prefer an in between to heavy and soft makeup. part of my everyday look is black in my waterline with mascara and (slightly smudged) eyeshadow, my favourite blush and lip gloss.

an artist i'd love to watch play live is probably Chase Atlantic. I know they're a band, but they count right? If not them, I'd say Childish Gambino.

is my life dangerous? well... yes. kinda. being Spiderman obviously puts me in danger but i like to think i'm well equipped to deal with all that with my powers and all. it's enough to worry my loved ones if they knew, at least. other than that, the regular amount of danger that comes with being famous.

if I were to change an aspect of my life, I'd change the canon events. i know things will get messy and miguel yaps a lot about how canon events NEED to happen but if i could change it with no consequence, i'd prevent the deaths. we can keep the happy ones, like falling in love. only question is, how am i going to deal with liking hobie if i'm with peter??

how do i dress? i don't have a specific style, and it changes a lot from day to day. i don't like fitting in boxes, so no specific aesthetic for me! i just wear whatever i like and whatever i feel like wearing, of course, i make sure i look good first <3

am i popular? i like to think so! (and the millions of people following me on social media platforms should answer your question). i have a fanbase that has been built up over the years from my acting projects to my fashion magazine. they're really sweet too, and are willing to consume any project i put out there, no matter how experimental it is.

my mbti is either INTJ or INFJ. i think i swing between thinking and feeling a lot, and they are both important to me so yeah!

my favourite season is autumn. i like that it's cooler at that point, with pretty reds and oranges decorating the environment. halloween also happens in the fall, so there's that to look forward to.

am i an organised person? i'd say i'm in the middle. if everything is too messy, i'll lose my mind (and procrastinate forever). it overwhelms me when there are piles of stuff everywhere, and i hate it when they crash over – i respect those who survive in such mess but personally, i'd crash out. if things are too neat, however, it's going to end up in me not doing anything too. i'd be too caught up in trying to maintain the neatness that i wouldn't really dare to touch anything, and everything also wouldn't feel personal. i stay in the comfortable middle, where things have some order to them, but you'll also see a random stack of magazines hanging out on my nightstand next to a pile of necklaces hanging off of a lamp (i wear them everyday and it's just easier like that).

my occupation is that of a student and uh a celebrity? i guess? i'm not sure how to put my role into words but i act, sing, and run a fashion magazine while i'm in uni, studying writing and literature. it's a lot (especially on top of my Spiderman duties) but i love it. acting and singing has been on the back burner lately though, since i've put it on pause to focus on the other stuff.

an attractive aspect i admire is either creativity or smarts. i think they're both really important, and i love creative people. they are amazing, and are constantly cooking up ideas in their heads that are sometimes genius, and sometimes... not so genius. either ways, being creative is a trait i love in people. smarts-wise, i admire smart people so much. the way their brains churn, the way they catch onto things swiftly, it's just really amazing to me, especially when they see things from a pov i cannot.

i know how to play the piano and guitar. i've learnt the piano since i was around 3, since my parents sent all of my siblings to learn it because it was supposed to help with cognitive development, etc. etc. they never forced me to take any exams i don't want to (exams stress me out), so i never really ditched piano. i have grown too busy for lessons however, and my piano sits back in the family home where my siblings can play. mostly inspired by hobie and the want to play it since forever, i'm currently learning how to play the guitar. i pick up instruments really easily though (thanks to me scripting that), so it's really helping.

do i have a partner? a crush? it's obvious lol, but i've got a crush on hobie. i have a suspicion (and am terrified) that he is aware of it, but i don't know. i'm chill with being his friend for now though, and we're really close. i'm in love with him.

biggest ick? when someone tries to act all superior and traditionally masculine... it makes me throw up in my mouth a little. in my spiderverse reality, most people don't act that way, but there is a small demographic that still thinks this way and these weirdos randomly crawl into my dms or fangreets and it makes me wanna puke. oh and when they recognise me in public and are convinced i'd fall in love with them because they're amazing or something?? i have to resist the urge to get a restraining order each time.

what is a song that describes you? no idea. i have absolutely no idea. i have no kins and no song that describe me. i haven't found things that i relate to 100% so far.

something i carry 24/7 would be my lipgloss and keychains. the lipgloss is for when i need to top up, obviously, but i have very specific keychains i carry about. i have one that is basically hobie's guitar but as a keychain hooked up to my wallet, alongside a four-leaf clover keychain gifted by my parents. i also have little keychains of fictional characters i love on my purses, whether bought or handmade.

look into your bag/purse, whats in there? is it messy? organised? what bag is it? my purse is lowkey messy... i know what is in there, with my wet tissues to wallet and other necessities, but i have to dig around to find stuff sometimes. other things in my bag are: lipgloss, phone, notebook (with pen), perfume samples (i throw them in and never take them out), sweets, and sometimes a book.. i have no idea what kind of bag it is so i'm ignoring that question lol.

where do i spend most of my time at? either my apartment or my university? i mean, i go to school on weekdays and go home on the weekends, and i rarely visit my actual office because most work can be done remotely. other than that, maybe hobie's houseboat/ dimension and the spider society? idk, i hang out at a lot of places.

a person i feel safe(st) with would be hobie. not to make everything about him (which is hard because he consumes my thoughts...), but i really do feel safe around him. i know that he's got my back if need be and truly wants the best for me. he also lets me just vent to him sometimes and he is amazing at helping me work past problems so there's that. i hope i return that favour back. if not hobie, probably my family members – like with hobie, i know they've got my back.

a person i dislike would be miguel. i know, i know, i've said that every single time someone asks who i dislike but i stand by it. i understand where he is coming from. i do. i understand the fear and the need to keep things safe. but he is so stubborn and so insistent on his own views that it is infuriating a lot of the time. i only stick around to save people, i just tolerate him.

who is my closest friend? + description.. harry osborn is my best friend. i've known him since childhood, since our parents were business partners and casual friends, and i've grown up with him. i can never tell if he's blonde or brunette, and if you ask him, he just shrugs and tell you it's the lighting, the asshole. according to him, there's no "correct" lighting which is annoying because i'd be laughing and joking that he had a blonde moment and he'd say he's brunette so it doesn't apply, and yet when i ask him why he's doing some stupid shit, he shrugs and says he's blonde. we have a very interesting history lol – he's someone i'd throw my couch pillows at but he was also my first kiss so idk. harry osborn's my best friend.

my favourite time of the day would definitely be night. it's when i'm the most creative, and it's so peaceful. there's this sense of home? comfort? belonging? when i'm just chilling out in the dark, with just enough lighting that my eyes don't die, and doing my own thing. it's as if night keeps me company. i also used to talk to the night sky when i was younger.

if my friends described me in 5 words, they'd say.. passionate, creative, lowkey crazy, weird, and loving.

if i were to describe myself in 5 words, i'd say.. passionate, weird, loyal, creative and loving. scripted that my friends have accurate perceptions of me so we don't have this weird misunderstanding of who each other are and expect things that we can't fulfill.

someone i admire would be my mom. she's gone through a lot, and i get so infuriated at how the paparazzi treated her in the past, acting as if she doesn't deserve privacy just because she was pursuing her dreams of being a model and actress. she deserves every good thing that happens to her, and i honestly really look up to her because of how hard she worked to get to where she was.

what am i known for? i'd say my projects + being my mom and dad's child.

if i could broadcast a sentence to everyone in the world, i'd say to just love each other. while i believe that humans are made to love and hate and that both are important, love just really unites us all and allows us to extend empathy and grace and kindness to other human beings.

if you have an s/o, how'd you meet them? i met hobie at the spider society. he had spikes on top of his mask and i was intrigued by him. seeing how he was, talking back to miguel and stuff, i got curious (and built up some courage) and approached him. we hit it off then and became friends <3

a fond memory i have is family night with well, my family. its a compulsory event where one of my family members have to host and we'd all spend time together doing whatever and chatting. it makes sure that we don't drift apart and we can bring whoever we want (it'd be a serious thing though).

my biggest pet peeve are people who chew with their mouths open and when i can hear them smacking their lips. it just icks me out and i really hate it. it's why i can't watch asmr videos, i am simply overcome by disgust by the sounds and visuals.

the favourite item that i own would maybe be my journal maybe? it's gorg and has everything i want. or any of the luxury items and other stuff that i bought for myself that i really like idk.

for my pets, i actually have 5. i have four cats (damian, ebony, maddie and charlie) and a doberman (rocco). damian and rocco are currently staying with me because they are the ones who need the most personalised care that i know how to deal with, and the other three are staying with my siblings because without peter, i can't take care of them all fully with all the shit i'm juggling (mostly spiderman duties...).

i don't really have a favourite piece of clothing.. i just make sure i love my whole wardrobe and i'm not wasting my money buying things i can't wear and have to throw out after.

my favourite animal would be a fox, especially corsac or sechuran foxes. they're so cute!! and i love when they bark (?).

notes: wow this ended up really long.. if you read all the way to the end, i love you (/hj). and yes, i did skip over the fame questions because i think it's too long and i've yapped too much about that alr (it'd just end up being repetitive).

this is the shifting exercise by @zaddizu

div. credits: @jiyascepter

[erinwantstowrite]

ERIN i cannot believe you are a fan of twisted wonderland too, you have feed me once again with your beautiful art thank you so much 🛐🛐

But who are your favorite tw characters?? And how do you think other batfam members would do in yuu's situation?

i love Twisted Wonderland!! in a sense that I ignore the Mickey Mouse plotline because what even is going on there LMFAO

It's so hard to choose a fav cause they're all so stinky and I adore the idiots so much,,, but my rankings are: Ace and Deuce for 1st place, Grim for second, Ruggie for third, Epel and Kalim for fourth, and Malleus for fifth. And this is if I HAVE to choose. the rest of them are so silly that I can not be contained. I need to torment Azul and shake him around <3

Tim would thrive the MOST in Twisted Wonderland, but we know how I feel about that by now. As for the others... I'm assuming we're going with them but when they were the same age as the first years in Twisted Wonderland (cause it's a school). In all of these scenarios, Crowley does not stand a chance. Also they all steal Grim.

Bruce isn't Batman yet when he's that young, but he's certainly just as crazy as he'll be in his twenties-fourties, maybe even MORE so because he doesn't have the experience of training yet. After figuring out that this isn't a hallucination or weird altered state that he's in (coma, spell, etc), he'd be an unbending force that gives them all a run for their money. He's incredibly smart and I doubt he'd be willing to put up with any bullshit that gets pulled. He would manage to get himself home and refuse to make any friends... but he would probably grow soft for Grim, Ace, and Deuce. Grim because Yuu takes care of Grim, and we all know how Bruce is about adoption. Same for Ace and Deuce, they're so stupid that Bruce would end up worrying about them 24/7. His paranoia about keeping them safe would prevent Azul getting a contract with them, etc etc.

Dick when he was Robin? He's terrorizing Crowley the entire time, with a smile on his face. He's so strong willed that anytime Crowley tries to put him into a situation where Crowley gets to fake being nice and magnanimous without actually helping, Dick calls him out and forces him into actually doing something, lest everyone see how he really is. (They know already but Crowley would try to save face.) He'd make friends with everyone- he'd tame Grim pretty fast and probably see it as an exercise to teach him how to be more patient. Honestly, Grim's temperament would remind Dick of himself when he was just starting off as Robin. It'd be like having a little brother and when Dick isn't stuck angsting about some shit Bruce pulled when being emotionally stunted, he's a good big brother. He'd make friends, but he wouldn't tell them anything about himself, keeping it close to his chest. Secret identities, and all that. Dick would also get himself home very fast, not willing to make B wait long. Plus he really missed Alfred.

He would try to steal Grim though. He would probably succeed, actually. All he'd have to do is tell Grim about the world he's from and how he knows magic users far beyond the level of the teachers at this school who could use a new student, and Grim would likely accept.

For Jason, when he was Robin, he was the sunshine kid. This would be after he's mellowed out with Bruce, when he's started to accept his life with B and Alfred, and started to grow into his own as Robin. They would all mistake his willingness to help as weakness, but Jason can be just as stubborn and clever as any other Robin. It's in their blood. He wouldn't be willing to let them talk down to him- he's used to people looking down on him because of where he comes from. The big fancy schools at home think he's trash from the bad parts of Gotham, and here isn't really any different. They think he can't get by without magic? Boy, will Jason sure show them. He's Robin.

I have a feeling that this, combined with Jason's love of school, would mean that Jason gets a little sidetracked with learning about this world, magic, and history, etc. He and Grim butt heads a lot, but Jason would get protective over him. Jason took care of the kids younger than him before, and his Robin is known for the comfort and kindness he shows.

He, too, would not make B wait a long time for him to come back. He's not as much of a detective as Batman or Nightwing, but he's clever enough to get himself home because of what he's learned. He would also steal Grim. In this scenario, it'd been a long time since anyone had cared about Grim the way Jason does about him. He'd come even without the speech about magic in Jason's world.

Tim... is the only Robin who'd make Batman wait. Not even out of a sense of being an ass about it, Tim would just thrive in Twisted Wonderland. He'd play up a role of being a "damsel in distress" or being silly and carefree and clumsy, etc etc. All the while Tim has been picking apart this mystery in front of him and he's got it all figured out. He's having a blast. It's Batman that comes to get him, and Tim probably wasn't expecting that, but, hey! Batman came to get him!

Damian. Holy shit is he a force to be reckoned with. He gets under everyone's skins, he doesn't bother hiding in plain sight, he demands to be treated the way he deserves. He's the son of Talia al Ghul and Bruce fucking Wayne. You try to put him in Ramshackle and he'll gut you with his sword for the disrespect. I think it'd be funny if Damian was like "this distasteful chandelier was only worth a billion of your currency?" and ADeuce try to kill him. Eventually they get along in the most hilarious way, but they're constantly fighting. Damian takes charge of their group, naturally, but he finds himself on equal footing with ADeuce at some point because they're from Twisted Wonderland and help him fill in the gaps of his knowledge. He's also studious (the PhD thing) and Deuce would ask for his help. Ace would get roped into it.

The only one that he gets along with? Grim. Because he's a cat with fire powers. Damian would think he's so fucking cool, he basically has a fuzzy little dragon. That can fit in his bed and cuddle with him and can talk. Come on. What 14 year old like Damian wouldn't think that's the sickest shit ever? He'd demand only the best for Grim, but would also easily start shaping him up to be a better mage. No, not better- the best. Damian would understand Grim's desire to find his legacy.

And, like, here's the thing. Even with all of that... Damian is a very empathetic kid. If he's about freshman year-aged, he'd be, what, 14? I think? That's after he started letting himself be more empathetic. After he lost his dad for a year and learned to be Robin because of Dick. Literally no one would expect Damian to be understanding or listen to the prefects' insecurities or hurt, nor willing to talk to them about it. But he does. He also hands their asses to them when they fight, but while that's happening, Damian is talking to them.

He steals Grim whether he wants to or not. But Grim does want to go with him.

This got WAYYY longer than I expected it to but this got me to thinking and we know I love to yap. I'd add Stephanie, Duke, Cass, Babs, etc, but I don't want this to get too long.

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved in our archive

By Nicole Karlis

A disease that's prevalent in women highlights the female sex bias in medicine

In modern-day culture, it’s common to complain about being tired. But for some people, being extremely tired is just one symptom of a disease that’s increased in awareness since the COVID-19 pandemic that can severely impact everyday activities: myalgic encephalomyelitis/chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS). Though the condition has existed for a long time, it can often manifest after a COVID infection, especially as an aspect of long COVID, in which symptoms linger for months or even years.

As research has shown, many long COVID patients either have symptoms similar to chronic fatigue syndrome or have been diagnosed with the disease. But just as long COVID remains a complex mystery, so does it’s so-called sister disease, chronic fatigue syndrome. Similarly, it’s a disease that researchers feel hasn’t been taken seriously in the scientific community. Not because it’s new, but because part of its female bias, coupled with its association with extremely debilitating fatigue, which is only one aspect of the condition. Even the term CFS can be misleading.

“The name chronic fatigue syndrome does not reflect people's symptoms as chronic fatigue is not the main feature of this disease, and for anyone to think that it is would diminish people's experiences,” Chris Ponting, a professor at the University of Edinburgh to co-lead of the DecodeME study, which is the largest ME/CFS study in the world, told Salon. “It’s also female dominant, there are five times more people within ME who are female than are male, also more people are more likely to have ME if they're older.”

That means, Ponting elaborated, that the typical ME/CFS patient is an older woman. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), having ME/CFS makes both physical and mental exertion difficult. Symptoms can include extreme fatigue, but also trouble thinking, severe tiredness and an inability to do activities, like shower or cook themselves a meal. There is no cure or treatment, and no official diagnosis process.

“Policymakers in this world are more often going to be younger males who have very little risk for this disease, and are perhaps completely unaware of the devastation that it has wrought across our population and still does through its sort of sister disease, long COVID,” Ponting said. “And without that understanding, without perhaps that personal knowledge, it flies under the radar despite affecting one in 200 people.”

One of the most peculiar aspects of chronic fatigue syndrome is its underlying biological mechanisms. In the world of health, people are frequently told that physical exercise is good. It’s an idea that has pervaded all of society around the world and for good reason. Scientific research has found that regular physical exercise reduces the risk of many types of cancer, heart disease, stroke and diabetes. But for ME/CFS patients, exercise is not usually recommended as a remedy — and can actually be harmful.

“We've been told from birth, if you're feeling out of sorts, go out outside and exercise, and we're told even in our last decades that exercise is good for us,” Ponting said. “But it is absolutely not true for this disease. It is actually reducing people's health, quality of life, and reduces their ability to move.”

As to why that’s the case, Ponting said the answer remains to be discovered, as the biological mechanisms of the disease are not entirely known. What is known, Ponting said, is that a majority of people come down with the disease after an infection. This could indicate that it’s the result of a problem with the immune system. There also appears to be a genetic component to the disease. In the DecodeME study, researchers are focused on studying the DNA of people with ME/CFS because they suspect some differences could reflect the biological causes of the disease.

Dr. Charles Shepherd, a medical advisor to the ME Association in the United Kingdom, was diagnosed with ME/CFS after he contracted chickenpox from a patient.

“I had a pretty nasty dose of chicken pox. All the sort of symptoms of chicken pox went away, but I just continued to feel unwell — not just a bit unwell, but quite unwell,” he told Salon. As a doctor, it was puzzling to him. He had debilitating fatigue that was exacerbated by physical and mental activity. Resting, he said, also didn’t help. He also had post-exertional malaise, which is a worsening of symptoms after minimal activity, which is a hallmark symptom of ME/CFS.

“It took me two years to get a diagnosis because I didn't know what was going wrong,” he said. “I wasn't taught about this illness when I was at medical school, and so again, very common still today, and I did all the all the wrong things from the point of view of management.”

Shepherd has been living with the disease for nearly 40 years. Yet he describes himself as one of the “lucky” ones who has found ways to manage his symptoms.

“The output of the prognosis is not good,” Shepherd said. “Probably only around about five to 10 percent of people make a full and sustained total recovery.”

Ponting said the fact that it occurs after an illness could mean that “the battery of the cell the mitochondrion has gone wrong in some way,” Ponting said. “But the shocking thing for me is that we don't know, and that's why we're doing the research.”

Shepherd has been able to find relief through “pacing,” which is energy and activity management. Currently, treatment usually also includes cognitive behavioral therapy to manage peoples’ symptoms. Graded exercise therapy, Ponting said, used to be recommended as part of the UK’s guidance, but isn’t anymore. The therapy included increasing a person’s level of activity, but it proved to be too harmful to people.

Through Ponting’s study, potential breakthroughs could be on the horizon.

“We'll show or shine a light down onto what exactly should be studied next,” Ponting said. “But what we're not going to do, unfortunately, is discover a drug that will help people manage their disease over the next few years.”