#anyways well be back to the usual silly posting soon im just. really frustrated about this

[motherforthefamicom]

why does getting a large following on the internet have to be so fucking miserable

[cozyteez]

Hii, do u have any tips for writing fics?? I’m so used to writing research reports, lab reports, and formal essays that creative writing has become something I really struggle with. I guess it’s having the freedom to write anything and not knowing how to make sure it’s not corny. I tried outlining a fic one time but it was so frustrating LOLOLOL. Anyways, I love your ateez fics. They are so cute and creative!!

hi !!!! im like rlly touched u asked me and i feel u actually that's why i started this blog; im a biomedical engineering major so as u can imagine i dont get to take much creativity with what i write because writing papers and reports and proposals are so formulaic and u gotta stick to the facts so that being said i actually tested out of all my college writing classes so all my writing knowledge is from ap english in hs lmao so take it w many grians of salt

the #1 thing i do when im feeling sort of unmotivated about a story or maybe like like dragging myself thru mud to write it is to just write the "fun" part first. to me the fun part is usually the climax or maybe the like the "wouldn't it be cute if..." moment that came to mind that inspired me to write a blurb in the first place! then usually once i sort of get the ball rolling on that my brain will help me out and keep the momentum going by thinking of maybe "oohh okay maybe this can happen next" or "oohh and what if this led up to it" or !! just stop there !! something ive learned from my mx writing blog which is like a year older than this one was that you don't owe anybody context especially for a blurb so maybe it really is just 3 sentences of a cute moment u thought of like its whatever ur the one writing it

now for longer fics im going to be honest jongho's first love is my first and only completed attempt at a multi stage coherent story. and that was fueled purely based on the fact that when i look at jongho he just gives off sort a really excited sort of innocence that i wanted to further explore and personify through the idea of him experiencing love for the first time but even then i really struggled w the last part because that's where my personal experience stopped and i had basically nothing to go off of because ive never been in love so i did have to kinda wait for ideas to come to me. for prince yunho i have posted 4 chapters but have all the way through chapter 15 drafted. and by drafted i mean it's like 3 sentences of the overall idea. again, the fic was inspired by the duality between yunho's on stage vs. off stage persona where if somebody was to watch an ateez performance for the first time they may find him very serious and maybe even intimidating but atiny would know that his off stage persona (the one he choses to create for us anyways) is very silly and happy-go-lucky and approachable, which is why prince yunho is seen as narameth's strong and stoic pride and joy but in reality he's sort of clumsy but means well. so i let that and his relationship w xenia who is an original character (OC) sort inspire stories or interactions that i force into a plot line. so for example i believe when i first started thinking abt a prince au for yunho i thought "wouldn't it be funny if the first scene started out painting him as this strong and serious man and then cut to him choking on food or something" and that sort of inspired the idea of him being nervous abt the speech and then xenia came out of that because he needed a complementary character imo since i knew he was gonna be kind of one dimensional and then his backstory with xenia inspired other ideas and then one day i was sad and wanted a hug so that inspired a piece of the plot line and so on. so basically: let an idea or even an aspect of somebody come to you and just write it down, let it inspire other ideas. and don't be afriad to completely start over. i wrote a whole chapter for prince yunho and deleted the whole thing because i hated where it was going and started back from scratch. sometimes you have to revisit things abt your characters and their relationships with others to get a new idea. there's a story in every person and every relationship you just have to find the clues

here's an example of what i mean by "write the good part first". this is typically what the very first draft of a blurb will look like for me

((( blah blah blah basically its raining and y/n is sad bc wooyoung broke her heart two weeks ago idk maybe go into it maybe not)))

y/n is all sad and feeling sorry for themselves on the couch theyre past crying but still feel pretty shitty plus it's storming and cold outside. great

there's a knock on their door ofc they have the cliche "who could that be moment" even tho they lowkey know. we literally all know

so yeah wooyoung's there soaked in rain eyes puffy y/n thinks he's been crying

-this would be the "fun part". i'll fix all that garbage up top later or maybe even change it completely idk yet-

"y/n? i - uh. hi"

he sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck while you crossed your arms over your chest, fighting the urge to close the door and walk away for good

"hi? really wooyoung? is that the best you can do?"

(((wooyoung does smth idk)))

"well i just -"

"you just what? showed up here in the rain after you broke my heart and didn't even bother to tell me why? this isn't some romance movie, asshole. you can't just come here late at night and expect to find me all sad and willing to take you back because i'm not. so say what you're gonna say so i can get back to my life"

your face was red hot and you trying very hard, probably too hard, to fight back tears. ((( idk talk some more abt y/n's emotions then what wooyoung is doing)))

"look, i made a mistake i-"

"oh my god! why did i know you were gonna do this. i just knew as soon as i saw you-"

"will you let me get a fucking word in!?"

well that was new. in the entire time you'd known him he had never raised his voice at you like that, your shock causing you to immediately close your mouth and fold your arms back into yourself (((make y/n seem more scared))) noticing your reaction, he lowered his voice back down and instictively reached for you, heartbroken at the way you jerked away from his touch

"please y/n, i'm sorry. i didn't mean to raise my voice it's just that i need to tell you that i regret what i did i regret breaking up with you so fucking much and you don't have to take me back i just need you to know how much you meant, no, mean to me. i still love you, a lot. there's not a day, an hour, a minute, or a single second that goes by that i'm not thinking of you"

"then why?"

your voice was small and wavering, your tears now dangerously close to spilling down your cheeks

"why what?"

"why did you break up with me like that, just all of a sudden"

he pushed his hands into his pockets and looked away

"because that morning i woke up before you and when i looked at you asleep next to me, i saw myself spending the rest of my life with you and it scared the shit out of me"

"why did it scare you?"

"because i just figured you didn't feel the same. i was selfish and wanted to save myself heartbreak down the line and so i told you i didn't wanna be with you anymore, but that was a mistake because it turns out i can't function with out you, i can't breathe without you i can't live without you, y/n. i shouldn't have let you go"

tears were now freely flowing down your face (((okay brain no work anymore y/n kisses him duh and then ofc they make up wooyoung prob says smth cheesy and y/n is like ur lucky i love you or smth ahaha the end)))

tl;dr -> don't be afraid to get messy. creative writing is not nearly as structured as academic/scientific writing. write whatever u want first it can even be the middle of a huge fight scene or some dialogue u think is funny. if ur stuck read what you have or maybe just take a break and let an idea come to you. a story doesnt have to come together til the very end so it can be as messy and out of order as u want until u wanna post it. also i would always use the third person omniscient point of view for a longer story like a chaptered fic as a default and only change if it would impact the plot in a negative way. this is where the narrator knows what every character is thinking/feeling and im p sure a teacher in middle school told me it was the easiest to write and follow

[silverandarsenic-hcs]

Ghost BC x Murder

im a simple girl. i have mental illness. i fantasize about being brutally murdered. is this problematic? 1000% yes. am i going to get canceled for this? 1000% yes. Have I been posting on borrowed time since that little caesars post? again, 1000% yes. Here’s this anyways.

TW: murder, blood, gore, manipulation (Papa II, Papa III), stalking (copia), domestic abuse (Papa III), substance and drug abuse (Papa II), Suicide (Papa II and Dew), Sex crimes - all consensual (Dew) these are about how they would murder you so im sure you can imagine the types of bad things it will entail. 

Papa I: For him, it’s a fit of emotion that drives him to kill. One thing piles on top of the next, frustration turns to anger, anger turns to rage. He doesn’t mean to hurt people, but when he gets so worked up, theres nothing that can stop him. All he can see is red until he’s snapped back into reality and sees the red staining his hands and his favorite robe. With you, all you had to do was walk into his office after a few bads days in a row, more bad news in tow, and that’s all it took. He loses his temper on you before your brain can even register that you should run. Before you can even scream. He’s not particularly a weapon guy, he’s more likely to choke you to death or anything he can do with his hands. If he feels so inclined, he’ll grab the nearest solid object to crush you with. He feels remorse, in the end, but still covers it up and hushes the room when they speak about your disappearance. Decently classic case of homicide - its usually someone you know, crime of passion, unplanned.

Papa II: This one hurt me very deeply to write. His case was classic, when he was a kid. Everyone says that when an adult loses it, you could tell from the time they were a kid that they had cracks - too abnormal, or too perfect. Papa had odd behavior but Nihil never had him tested or even looked at for anything because his ego got in the way, and nothing could possibly be wrong with his son. And nothing was really wrong with him. Something just wasn’t right. He felt things strongly: love, hate, depression, elation, anxieties. Sometimes it was too strong for him to cope. Sometimes he would turn to things that would help him deal with the emotional rollercoaster he couldn’t get off of. Other people just got on with him. He started smoking weed in his twenties. That wasn’t enough. He started drinking heavily at 25. By thirty that wasn’t enough either. Stronger, more potent vices were what he needed. Cocaine. Heroin. Anything to make him feel okay - anything to make him feel. And you, you were the light of his life. The only good thing he’d ever known. You were the only person he had met who could keep up with him, but keep him safe at the same time. But eventually you got swept up in the parties and drugs and drinking too. Lost more control as the months and years passed. And one night he thought you were pussing out. Not being fun. That you were being boring and killing his mood. He pushed you until you did more lines, and kept pushing you and pushing you until your nose began to bleed. But he was so gone he didn’t realize. He pushed you and you accepted it because it was the first time you had ever truly been afraid of him. When you overdosed and died on the couch in the living room of your shared apartment, Papa had already passed out in the bedroom. It was three days before he sobered up enough to wake, and when he found you, he called the police and said there’d been a murder. But he knew what happened. He knew what he did. Cocaine has a funny way of making things stick like that. He hung up the phone, and before the police could arrive, took his own life the same way he took yours. 

Papa III: In the beginning, he has a silly little crush. He steals glances your way. He brushes up against you and makes you blush. As you two talk more, he falls deeper. You two become a couple, an item. You tell each other you love them. Years could pass. You move in together. You don’t notice any cracks in him, but he sees them in the relationship. He saw you talking to the new guy at work today. What’s that, you had lunch with him? That’s interesting. He sees the way you look at the barista when he says your name, and hands you your coffee. You say he makes it the best. He sees the way your friends look at him. He goes through your phone once, when you’re sleeping, and doesn’t find anything. he kicks himself for months about invading your privacy and promises himself that he’s going to stop digging. But he can’t tear himself away. When youre in the other room, he’ll go through your purse. The next time he sees you smile at another man in passing, when you get home he confronts you. you say he’s being crazy. he says your crazy for cheating on him. he just loves you. cant you see? he loves you. when he finally chains you to the radiator in the bedroom so you won’t leave him, you’re shocked at how a man you once loved could be this way. When he finally kills you he’s begging you, with his hands around your throat, to understand that he’s not a bad person. He's not a bad person. He's not a bad person. He’s not a bad person.

Cardinal Copia: He stalks, but never gets close. Not like III. He’s aware of the mistakes of his predecessors. He’s smarter than that. More calculating. He would learn you schedule - morning routine, where you work, what you eat, when you get home, night routine, how long you sleep for. When you touch yourself. When you see your friends. At first it was from interest, but he begins to hate you. The way you walk, the way you talk, who you love, who you hate. And he wants you dead for it - but he wont be hasty, no, he’s still smarter than that. he has to remain calm and collected to pull this off. Hate you as much as he wants, he still knows you’re smart. Not as smart as him, but smart. Its thursday night, and you’re home alone getting ready to go out to the new bar in town with your friends. he climbs into the kitchen through a window he knows you leave unlocked for when you yourself forget your keys and need to break in. In the end, he slits your wrists with a knife he pulled from the wooden block on the counter. Good thing he followed you to work and school, he knows your handwriting wonderfully. He watches you bleed out on the floor while he writes your suicide note. You have never met him in your life. Good thing he always wears those gloves to keep everything clean of fingerprints, because the cops never suspect any foul play, and no one has a clue.

Swiss: He doesnt get close to his victims - he doesn’t have time. When you’ve gone through this many people, you start to forget their names, if you even knew them from the start. He takes jobs as an assassin when he needs the money - and it does pay well - but whenever he needs to blow off steam he’ll really go at it. Get creative. He’s a weapons guy, gun by choice but he’ll really use anything, and he knows each in his collection very very well. But in his eyes he isn’t doing anything wrong, he’s killing people that deserve to die, for good reasons (Edward Cullen who??). Racists, fascist, misogynists, homophobes. He was on the news once for throwing a brick at a nazi. You’re the anomaly on his list of victims though. You were an accident of sorts. He got sloppy with one of his jobs, got noticed, and the vic took a hostage - cue you walking into the back room at work at the wrong time - the only way he can get his shot in without risking his own life or alerting others is to shoot right through you. And now that he’s been noticed, he can’t give up the job and run. He memorizes the details of your face before he pulls the trigger, and kills you and the man with his arms around your torso in one shot. He feels the worst out of everyone. Attends your funeral, but stands very far back. Something about your face, the look in your eyes when you died. He thinks about you often, for a long time. When the exact dip of your nose and contours of your cheekbone begin to fade, he pulls a picture of you he cut from the newspaper from a shoebox under his bed. If he regrets any of the bad things he’s done in his life, it was hurting you.

Aether: He’s the one you don’t expect and he knows it. He’s the cult leader of the group - but that doesn’t make sense. He’s not even a leader in any capacity. He’s no Papa, not even a Cardinal. He doesn’t even lead the ghouls, really. But people trust him, and respect him, and that’s enough. The most pull he has in the church is being what you would compare to an advisor for the cardinal. helps him make decisions here and there. They get more drastic as things go on, and the church slowly burns itself down, but Copia is the only one people blame, including Copia, because Aether makes him believe every choice he made was his own idea. Eventually, when the cardinal has become useless, Aether will have him removed. By whatever means he has to take, but ideally not murder, it’s too early to have blood on anyone else's hands in his name, and far too early to have blood on his own hands. Aether promises to rebuild the name of the church, and fix everything the cardinal destroyed, and make things better.. Make people happy, and health again. And every single person drinks the kool-aid. Soon, rather than worshipping any Dark Lord or Old God, people are worshipping Aether. People believe in him with their hearts and souls. People believe he’s the savior. You are the anomaly. You were close with Aether before all of this started, before he was even the cardinal’s advisory. You just think the power has gone to his head, and blame the cardinal with the rest of him. But when you start digging, you realize it’s been his plan all along to have complete and total power To start his own cult. To be worshipped like a god in a place that was built for it. Your death is a stepping stone on the path for Aether to achieve ultimate power, but of all the stones cast, yours was the only one that meant anything. He didn't want to have to kill you. He didn't want you to defect, and put everything he'd worked so hard for at risk. He couldn’t have that. But the road to his ultimate power ends with his own death too - you can’t really be appreciated for everything good you've done for the world until you die, and he knows that. But until then, he will think of you often.

Dewdrop: Kills you for sexy reasons. Not because you wont sleep with him, or he wants to actually hurt you, but because you both got too swept up in the moment. There’s a movie called Sexual Predator and he’s pretty much the guy in that. One minute he’s got his belt wrapped around your throat, tugging on it hard while he’s hitting it from behind. He’s too caught up in the moment to realize you’ve gone limp on the bed. He doesn’t realize anything is wrong until he finishes. And it’s bad. Oh it’s bad. Unlike every other crime he’s committed, he calls the police, and he’s honest about what happened. He’s disgusted with himself. He’ll never have sex again. He’ll never wear a belt again. He’ll never touch another person’s throat again. He’s sentenced twelve months incarcerated along with probation and some hefty fines. Everyone knows what he did, how he did it. You were friends with all his friends - You weren’t together, but you were friends. And they all know he killed you. If any of the above are likely to have their own suicidal thoughts after the murder, Dew is the most likely to do it. He can’t stand the way everyone treats him after he did it. He can't stand living knowing what he did to you and what hes capable of. He can’t go on like this.

Cirrus & Cumulus: When they kill it’s for each other. In a LOT of other HCs i mention that II’s solution to things is to simply “kill them” if they’re bothering you, but the girls actually just do it. If someone touches Cirrus in a club, Cumulus will absolutely pull a gun out of her back pocket and blow their brains out right there. Good thing for the masks. They’ll spend the next few months or years on the road, saying under the radar until it’s safe to go home again. The ghoulettes have a lot in common with Swiss - they kill for what they believe to be a good reason. The difference is that Cirrus and Cumulus aren’t opposed to the more gorey ways of doing it. Torture, manipulation, blackmail, you name it they’ve probably done it. They know a lot of dirty things about a lot of big people, and at their whim they could have all their hearts desire. Trouble is, knowing everyone’s secrets is just a little bit more fun than that. They’ll kill to protect their friends and family, anyone who has ever unintentionally hurt an animal, and anyone that’s standing in their way. They’ll even collaborate with Swiss on a job if it’s gonna take some more elbow grease, and he needs people he can trust to get the job done without leaving behind a crumb trail of evidence.

- Kat

[rogsclogs]

Some Day One Day (Brian May x Reader); part 12

I’m sorry this took a while to post, I was unhappy with how it originally turned out and had to rewrite it a couple of times. Hope you enjoy it, next part will be up very soon, hopefully by tomorrow. The series is almost over :,)

tag list: @brighter-thanthe-sky @im-a-sheerheartattack @fruityfreddie @discodeakygotmorerhythm @killer-queen-xo @destiel-stucky4ever-loki-queen @alfinaldelarcoiriss @warren-lauren @kazzish @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @avengerraven1023 @imgonnabeyourslave

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They lived happily ever after since then.

At least, that's what I’d like to tell you, but we both know that’s not how it’s going to go, don't we?

However, things did go perfectly right for quite some time and everything in Brian and Y/N’s lives was amazing, especially their relationship. As soon as Y/N started her master course she got right into it, arriving at every lecture on time and with all her work done and ready to hand in, much to Brian’s happiness. All he wanted was to see her succeed, after all. At first he had offered to help her do her school work, but she obviously refused to let him do so, her pride taking over her rational side which told her that getting help wouldn't be such a big deal after all. Even when she did have classes with him she always rejected any help Brian offered, which kind of frustrated him, but he was even more proud of her when she got things right knowing she did everything by herself.

Then, right after school, he would drive her back to their apartment and they would spend the afternoon together, sometimes baking cookies for Emily and sometimes having sex for hours on end, depending on their mood. 

Mostly the ladder, though.

Y/N was in the second trimester of her course when something started feeling off.

She started waking up feeling something within her bugging her and she went to sleep feeling the same way.

She had been vocal about it with Brian, but even though he was keen on having a doctor visit her, she kept pushing her visit back, not wanting to cause any trouble to anyone and figuring whatever it was that made her sick would soon disappear.

knowing how easily she was affected by stress, she also figured that that could be the reason behind her sickness, after all she was still going through a hard time with her family and such, none of her relatives were particularly happy to find she was living with a man who was twice her age and had a daughter with another woman, but she couldn't be bothered to hide it either although she’d never told anyone that he was in fact her university professor, that was way too risky for anyone to be aware of. Still, most of her family were totally against it and a huge part of them had stopped talking to Y/N altogether, not that she was too sad about the loss, it was mostly just disappointment making her upset.

It could be the stress of knowing everything in your life is going great, cause that is in itself a reason to be stressed out, especially when you're used to dealing with constant chaos and people trying to mess you up.

It could be the immense love she felt for Brian moving around in her body everyday, which she often though would make her sick because she truly loved that man more than anything and anyone else.

It could be some of the things that little Emily offered her to eat when she played cook, they could absolutely be toxic for all she knew (she immediately felt silly for thinking something like that, knowing damn well how obsessed Brian was with double checking anything that came close to his daughter’s mouth to make sure it was safe).

It could be anything in the world and it was probably temporary anyway, so why would she worry the people around her? There was no need for it.

And maybe Y/N could have gotten away with it, if it hadn't been for her body giving up on her, quite literally.

It all started on a foggy winter morning, Y/N woke up feeling rather ill and couldn't bring herself to have anything for breakfast. Brian had tried to convince her over and over again, but there was no point in forcing her to get food in her system if she felt like she couldn't keep it down anyway.

She felt extremely nauseous and lightheaded, and Brian was worried knowing she was most likely not telling him just how sick she was really feeling, so he tried to convince her to stay home from school, even promising to collect all the worksheets she would need to catch up on her homework, but to no avail. Y/N was very stubborn and sometimes Brian wished she could just give into his requests when they came from a place of worry and care, but he knew it would be pointless to argue so he just forced her to take whatever medicine he had at home and got in the car with her and Emily.

The whole ride he kept an eye on the two girls in the backseat (Emily didn't like sitting by herself back there, so whenever Y/N was around she would always offer to keep her company) and soon realized Y/N seemed to be moving in slow motion, like she was too tired to react to what Em was talking to her about. Not that the little girl would notice anyway, she was rambling about something that had happened at daycare the day before and she had her usual bright smile taking over the features of her face. She was way too young to realize how pale Y/N looked and how distracted she was, especially because she tried her best to keep up with the conversation, mostly so she wouldn't worry Brian.

She even offered to walk Emily into the building where her daycare was, which Brian begged her not to do as a lot of people there knew who Emily’s mom was and he knew they wouldn't keep their stupid mouths shut.

He tried once more to convince his girl to get back home right before they got into the school parking lot.

“I can tell you're not feeling great, why do you do this to yourself? Just take a goddamn day off Y/N, you're not gonna miss that much anyway”

“Brian, you know how I feel about days off when they're not necessary”

“But right now it IS necessary! It’s basically written all over your face that you're sick, I've never seen you look this pale before and you haven't even had anything for breakfast, which is not only unhealthy but very unlike you. Please, I am begging you, just let me drive you back home, I don't care if I'm ten minutes late to my lecture, I'm sure everyone will understand”

“I’m not having this conversation with you again, Bri. I’m fine. I’ll see you in third period” was all she said before angrily stepping out of the car and slamming the door behind her, leaving Brian in his car to curse himself for pushing her too far. He should have just listened to her, if she needed something she would tell him without being forced to.

He pushed himself to get out of his vehicle and to stop thinking about Y/N, he had more important things to focus on: papers to grade, lessons to go over and his students’ questions to answer. He couldn't afford to let her distract him, no matter how much he cared for her wellbeing, after all she was a responsible adult.

They both went on with their day as normal, even though Y/N kept feeling worse by the minute. All the people who had seen her that morning could sense that something was going on, but only a few of them pointed it out to her, not wanting to seem rude. She had sighed deeply and ignored everyone’s questions, wondering if she really looked so bad that everyone in school seemed to be so interested in knowing how she was doing. 

She almost got into an argument with Joe because he too tried to convince her to go back home. After their ‘date’ at the cinema, Y/N had tried her best to distance herself from him, not only because she knew Brian didn't love the idea of them hanging out, but also because she was almost positive Joe was crushing hard on her, and she didn't want to lead him on or have to deal with any jealousy issues. Still, he tried to talk to her almost on a daily basis and didn’t seem to get the memo that she just wasn't interested, so Y/N dealt with it and stopped complaining, knowing there was not much he could do once school was over. On that day, however, he had gotten so much on her nerves that she couldn't help but slightly lash out at him, it was none of his business how she was feeling and she didn't want to admit how seriously worried she was starting to become for her own health.

So, she just isolated herself until third period eventually came, and she made a mental note to herself to apply some makeup before entering the lecture hall so that maybe Brian wouldn't be too worried about her if she didn't look sick.

However, she never actually made it to the bathroom as she felt herself slowly slip out of consciousness right as she was getting there and her body fell limp on the hard floor. 

[inawickedlittletown]

Walking The Wire (108/?)

Summary: Tony Stark always knew about Peter Parker. He didn’t know that Peter was going to get superpowers and become Spider-Man, but he always knew about Peter because Peter was his son.

This will span from pre-Iron Man up through the rest of the MCU (eventually including Infinity War) and will be for the most part canon compliant except where I’ve taken some liberties and interpreted canon a certain way.

Pairings: Pepper/Tony, Tony/Steve (endgame), Tony/Mary (past)

A/N: If you want me to tag you when I post new chapters let me know. This fic is also on AO3

I used Collider’s MCU timeline to stay canon and the title of this fic is an Imagine Dragons song that is just so fitting for Peter and Tony

@findmeinthestarss

Masterpost

Chapter One Hundred Seven

They never found out what had been going on with Loki and Thor because nothing came of their appearance and then disappearance because aside from a blip somewhere in Ireland that wasn’t necessarily them, there was nothing and while Tony waited for the other shoe to drop and something crazy to happen somewhere else in the world, nothing did.

“So, do you think he was just popping in for a visit and didn’t even think to stop by here?” Rhodey asked during a team meeting.

“I don’t know,” Tony said. “And there’s no way to contact him. I called up Jane and she -- well, apparently they broke up sometime before he left the last time and she didn’t have a way to contact him anyway which is sort of why they broke up.”

“But nothing’s happened right,” Sam said. “I mean, no random Asgardians have shown up so--”

“Not since then,” Tony said. “At least not that my satellites picked up anyway. But Coulson or Fury would have mentioned if they heard anything.”

Tony kept paying attention, but nothing outside of the usual happened. Ross’ announcement that Spider-Man was Tony’s son had been a small blip that most people didn’t pay attention to despite all the pictures that Ross had managed to get of Spider-Man coming and going from the tower. Mostly, he just sounded like a conspiracy theorist especially after Tony tweeted that his son was definitely not Spider-Man and that the theory had made Steve laugh. Still, he was sure some people did believe Ross’ story. It was also a concern that Ross was clearly keeping an eye on the tower.

There was a whole thing with the resurgence of AIM in the middle of August but it was such a disorganized mess that they didn’t get very far in even setting themselves up as a threat and Tony had them all rounded up and arrested in the course of an afternoon.

By the time that the summer was actually over, Tony was starting to relax on the Thor front. Peter on the other hand was a tad disappointed that he hadn’t gotten to meet the god yet. It turned out that next to Iron Man, Thor was Peter’s favorite.

“He’s an actual god,” Peter had said, “but also an alien. And just cool. He’s just so cool.”

Sam found the whole thing amusing. “Your kid has good taste at least,” he said, “if he had to crush on any of us.”

“It’s not a crush! I just -- he’s a god, Sam! And the lightning--” Peter trailed off as Sam laughed and Tony tried not to join in.

“He is seriously impressive,” Natasha said in Peter’s defense.

“Yes, exactly,” Peter said.

“Which is why you had a crush on him,” Sam said matter of factly and Peter threw up his arms in the air and Tony knew that he had figured out he couldn’t really say much else to make a difference to the conversation. Mostly, though, Tony loved the level of ease that Peter had with the rest of The Avengers.

But when Peter’s birthday came around, Tony decided that they needed to go on a mini-vacation. Not to get away from anyone, but because Tony wanted to spend some time on his own with Peter away from wedding planning and everything else that was going on at the tower. They went to California because Peter had never been to the West Coast and because Peter had also been interested in seeing the rebuilt Malibu house. It was fun to show Peter around and take him to a few of Tony’s favorite spots. All in all, their vacation was a nice break from the usual. They got back after a couple of weeks away and right in time for Peter to get back to school and Tony to move forward with the new suit. Everything was ready and Tony just needed to have the housing unit put in his chest.

On the night before school was starting up again, Peter was leaning against Tony’s side. There was a movie on, but Tony had long given up on watching it because the plot had changed so drastically that the movie was downright silly and either way, Tony had gotten busy answering emails because Pepper couldn’t understand why Tony was delegating everything to do with SI for the next week or two. Tony still hadn’t told her that he was going to be putting in the housing unit for the nanotech in his chest. He and Shuri both agreed that it was the only way to make it as effective as Tony wanted it to be.

“Is it going to be a long operation?” Peter asked.

Tony looked down at him. “A few hours.”

“I don’t like that I’ll be in school and I won’t be here.”

The whole thing with Thor had really hastened Tony to get the device ready faster. He wanted to be prepared for the next time something happened and things would have been dire if Thor’s return had signaled the beginning of something being wrong. Sure, Tony had his other suits, but the nanotech one was going to be better than any other. Steve and Peter for their part thought that he knew best despite the risk that the surgery would bring him.

“You’ll be here plenty,” Tony assured him. “Nothing is going to go wrong. I have the best doctors on this and we have a good plan for how we’re handling this.”

“Dr. Cho is pretty great,” Peter said with a grin.

Tony wrapped his arm around Peter’s shoulders and pulled him closer. “So why did you want to watch this movie again?”

“Ned recommended it,” Peter muttered. “I don’t think I’ll be taking his advice on movies again any time soon.”

Tony laughed. “On that we can agree, kid.”

---

Steve didn’t argue with Tony once Tony decided that he needed to get the housing unit put into his chest. It was Tony’s body and Tony’s decision and while Steve did voice his questions and got Tony to think about the pros and cons, he left it up to Tony because Tony knew best when it came to his suits. The device was different than the arc reactor, anyway, in that it wasn’t working to keep Tony alive. Looking at the ring with the shrapnel that had almost killed Tony, reminded Steve of how much Tony had gone through and survived.

He was with Tony during the operation, holding his hand while Dr. Cho and her team worked on Tony with a combination of Dr. Cho’s tech and Shuri’s as well. It brought down the risk for the procedure considerably. When it was over a few hours later and the whole thing was successful, Steve let out a sigh of relief.

“Good,” he said.

The whole thing was taking place in the compound since the facility had a medical wing and Tony had gone ahead and added an operating room to it too. It meant that Tony was going to be staying at the compound for a few days even if that was more of a precaution than anything, but it was better for him to not have to travel to the tower while fresh out of his operation. Steve had insisted on being there so his anklet was off. The FBI had only checked in on them once since putting the anklets on and the only reason they showed up in the first place was that Sam’s had malfunctioned. It was lucky that they were all in the tower at the time, not that Fury had been sending them on a lot of missions lately. Things were on the quiet side.

“He’ll be asleep for a little longer,” Helen said. “We’ll move him somewhere comfortable. You can call Peter in, if you want.”

“I’ll go get him,” Steve said and leaned over to kiss Tony’s forehead first.

Helen smiled at him.

When he returned with Peter in tow, Tony had been moved into one of the rooms in the medical wing. Tony was still asleep, but he looked peaceful all tucked into bed.

“Everything went perfectly, Peter,” Helen said. “He’ll be awake in an hour or two. Myself or someone from my team will come check in.”

“I’m glad,” Peter said as Helen grabbed a few things and walked out of the room. “I was actually a little worried,” he admitted to Steve. “I just -- I’ve lost all the father figures in my life and he was doing this and I was worried.”

Peter walked to stand by Tony’s bed and Steve moved forward and placed a hand on his shoulder. “You dad rarely does anything that isn’t for a reason. And if he had suspected that this was any riskier than it needed to be he wouldn’t have done it because the last thing he wants is to leave you. Shuri and Helen worked this out and you know how smart they are.”

“I know,” Peter said and looked up at Steve. “I just couldn’t help it. And thanks for helping me get out of school today. Dad just kept saying how I didn’t need to be here.”

“Yeah, well, he hates that we fuss about him.”

---

Taking it easy was boring. At least, it wasn’t bed rest. Tony could move around and he could go to the workshop but he was limited by how long he could work and how much he could lift or really do which ultimately just made him grumpy. Steve was also hovering for most of his time in there and jumping in to do things for him which Tony had found endearing at first but then kind of frustrating. So, he was happy to be back to normal a month and a half later even if Steve still seemed a bit wary of him doing much. Pepper was worse. She had started to just show up to make sure he was okay every other day right after Tony moved back to the tower and she’d fussed and fussed over him after telling him off for putting the housing unit in his chest in the first place until Tony had enough.

“You know,” Steve said one afternoon, “it’s almost been a year since I came back.”

“It has,” Tony said. A full year. It had been more than a year since the whole fiasco with The Vulture too. They were lucky that there hadn’t been any big villain like that popping up since but even if there had been, Tony was confident that Peter would have been able to handle it.

Training with Steve and the team in general had made a huge difference to Peter’s capabilities as Spider-Man. Peter didn’t use the Iron Spider suit often, opting for his other suit over that one most of the time, but he had gotten so much better with his powers and just his physicality because he wasn’t just following his instincts which were often good, he was doing more. Strategizing and thinking his plans through and really knowing his strengths and weaknesses and using that knowledge to do things in the best way possible.

“And it hasn’t been all bad,” Steve said.

“Yeah,” Tony said. “I half expected you to get too bored to stay.”

“I’ve found that life can’t be boring when you’re in it. But, not just that, it makes a difference that we’re together. You’ve made this worth it and it’s just one more year, Tony.”

“We better hope nothing crazy happens before then,” Tony said. “I thought Thor coming back meant--”

Steve nodded. “I know. I know. I did too. I just wonder what the whole point of it was. He wouldn’t have shown up and left that quickly without there being some reason and I just don’t trust that Loki was with him. Wasn’t he supposed to be dead?”

“Yeah,” Steve said. “That’s what Thor said.”

“Jane was confused about that too. She seemed concerned -- but she hasn’t called which means she hasn’t found anything alarming. At least I have this thing now,” Tony said and tapped his chest. “It makes me feel a little better about any possible threats.”

It was Tony’s fear -- and had been since going through that wormhole -- that they’d be faced with something from outside their world again. Even if nothing came to pass, he wanted them to be prepared. After all, he’d seen what some of those aliens could do and create and it was only a matter of time before Earth became a target again. Loki being alive -- he’d been the one behind the attack in New York. Of course, helped by the stone in the scepter but nevertheless one of the reasons. Thor had said he was leaving to find out more about the stones and...and maybe it was what he was still trying to figure out. It worried Tony.

Chapter One Hundred Nine

[unproduciblesmackdown]

tfw hating life enough for a reeadmooore

‪yesterday afternoon i’d blocked out 3 pgs in my sketchbook & by that night i was thinking like well i’m so close to finished the sketchbook finally (ive been using it about a yr and a half by now) that i could just stop drawing when i hit the end there‬

but i’d mentioned the impending end of my sketchbook space a friend is already in the process of sending over some they havent ever used so that will at least mean if i stop drawing it’ll just have to be because i want to lol

like in this case it’s special b/c of course i’ve had periods where i’m like smh what if i just don’t draw anymore, but that’s tended to be about being frustrated w some element or other of it all. this time it was mostly just that every day of my life i have a tiny bit less motivation or energy or etc. yesterday i was thinking all day about offing myself, which i’d done the day before, and done today too

like, it’s nothing new, i’ve been hating being alive and wanting to kms and only moving in the direction of less disappointment to more disappointment and having to care less about things i previously cared about because for one reason or another things get to a point where it only adds frustration to my life anymore

but despite depression and wanting to die and life being miserble all being Not New, that doesn’t mean that it doesnt matter anymore, because after day after day after day after day after day of it for years and years, you’re in a worse place than you were a while back, even if you do feel the same. even a single day of wishing you were dead the whole time is shitty enough. feeling overall like even if you’re in a good mood now, you know your life is trash and you’re going to go back to feeling bad soon, is also shitty enough

like the thing that drawing had going for me is that, like reading and writing sometimes and even some other shit, it’s something i like to do. i do it for myself, really. but it helps that its the way i trick ppl into being here in the first place to see anything i’m talking about. i have really crap appeal. i mean i’m bad at being appealing thru shit i draw, but it’s still way more of something anybody wants vs like five yrs worth of my text posts. like...i have over 10x more followers than i did on a blog where i rarely drew anything ever

but anyways despite me drawing b/c i enjoy it, i enjoy enjoying things less. always in the middle of that “loss of interest in pleasure” life lol.......it doesn’t really matter how long i do or don’t keep drawing, b/c i mean, it doesn’t much matter to me whether i’m having fun or not. i can be enjoying drawing and still wanting to die, because that’s whats happening lol.....nothing that’s a personal factor of my life is all that important to me, because my personal existence is not that important to the person living it

also it sure hasnt helped that my sense of things like whether my life can get better or i’ll have the opportunity to pursue my nonexistent dreams or live an ideal version of my life that also doesn’t exist are all at all-time lows and only just getting lower day by week by month by year. the only way i can even look at cheering myself up is from a day-to-day perspective. and i can have a slightly more fun day than usual and then be extra down on the very next day b/c of how being a bit less numb means you’re crap-feeling emotions are now game too. and i’m very aware of how, if you’re not in a position that insulates you enough, if things get worse for you, that makes “things getting worse for you” more likely, and it’s an exponential drop that gets harder and harder to climb out of, and even if you move back up a notch out of good luck, you’re still just as likely to be knocked back down to where you were. the odds of me suddenly not only not fucking hating being alive but also having a life that doesnt fucking make me hate being alive? that’s a funny joke

‪also it’s frustrating that whether i feel good or miserable on any given day only really exists if i say something about it in a post like this lol... like i might feel awful one day but if i dont have it in me to spend ages writing about it, which is difficult also b/c putting feelings into words where ppl will only fully Get It if they’ve felt that way too, anyways if i dont write about how shitty i feel and post it then maybe later on when i’m feeling a little better or feeling a different kind of shitty, i also won’t be interested in being like “oh btw i felt awful the other day.” and if i don’t mention it, as far as everyone in the world knows, it was never a thing that happened, so it might as well not have. i mean, as a person i might as well not be happening, especially since i don’t want me to be happening lol‬

and like i was saying to someone the other day, its a lot harder via text to talk about shit b/c like, if you’re with a friend in person, you can talk abt boring or silly things and its easy and makes a good conversation. whereas talking via twitter means it would be clunky and time consuming to layout exactly had empty and depressing my existence is, and silly shit isn’t even worth the energy when you’re having a convo w lengthy gaps in it, so you can only really talk about the broadest, most interesting shit. which i don’t have much of, oh well

i do like talking and talking to people actually, it’s just rough when it’s all a few ppl online, even though i alsp extremely appreciate those people and enjoy the talking. it’s like, chatting to ppl online is like a piece of chocolate cake. it’s delicious and you love it, but it would be amazing if it was the extra bonus on top of getting solid meals every day, instead of it being the only thing you have to eat and you get it maybe once or twice a week and it’s still wonderful and is all the more valuable for it, but it isnt the same as getting enough to eat always, or Knowing you’ll keep getting enough to eat

anyways my social life is always its own special kind of depressing, even when i AM in the same place as friends. you’d have a hard time finding a situation where the concept of What I Have To Say seems interesting or even relevant to other ppl. and im not sure i’ve ever been in groups where i feel totally comfortable with everyone there and don’t feel out of place. so talking about the idea of knowing you always have access to someone to talk to or be with in person or having friends who you know you can hang out with and they actually like you and you still expect to have them a few yrs down the road—all that’s always been a “well, in theory i mean” or “at least, i imagine it would be like that” issue for me

tbh i generally feel the most comfortable enjoying myself when i do something alone; maybe it’s because i have more experience of ppl im around treating me really shittily than treating me well

ohhhhhh wellllllllllllllll what else do i have to talk about. hmmm the fact that feeling like i wanna die only seems to be regarded as an issue of “well are you gonna or not,” aka if you havent its a Victory and a happy situation instead of it being a matter of EVERY DAY I’M A CONSCIOUS ORGANISM I WISH I WAS DEAD AND MY EXISTENCE HAS BEEN HEADED IN THAT DIRECTION FOR AT LEAST THE LAST HALF OF IT

like how heartwarming that i’ve been actively suicidal for how many years? 6? 8? but i havent yet!! i always want to but just never get around to it and so this time for sure lol no more fooling around!! oh dammit and there goes another birthday still alive. like this is some elusive new years resolution or novel i mean to write.

funny i mention it because there’s practically nothing anymore that i want to do. even if i THOUGHT my life would ever become okay, i want fuckall out of it. i only exist, baby............and it’s like i said earlier, whenever i try to come up with a sad amount of potential motivations NOT to die, i have to realize that none of the shit is actually for me, or directly about me, or centered on me. like, this shit lost its charm ages ago.

well anyways. i suppose thats all i can think to say now. and it doesn’t make a difference whether i talk about my shitass existence and how crap i feel or not. it just gives the chance for a bit of it to exist in the world via a few other ppl being aware of it for a few minutes maybe, because who DOESNT want to thoroughly read a shit essay by some random weirdo about how everything sucks. the end

[sunbaethehuman-blog]

Indecisive - ( Pt. 1)

Yoongi Angst | Taehyung x Reader

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 (coming soon)

Pairing: Yoongi x Reader | Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Angst, fluff, BTS x Reader, series

Author’s note: SECOND FANFIC AYYYYY. I’ve been writing this one since….. this summer maybe?? lol idk im lazy af and i still have other stuff to write. RLLY GOOD STUFF TOO. ive been into angst stuff lately bc i love to break my heart over n over again :’))) thats my kink guys!!! getting my heart broken!! haha jk im srry i will sto p anyways. I love yoongi with all my heart,,,, but i also love taehyung with all my heart so i was like WHY NOT AHAHAHA bias vs bias wrecker ok now i’m overdoing this author’s note thing im srry pls enjoy btws i posted this without rlly reviewing it so YEAH LETS GET IIIIIIT

“Ew, what kind of face is that?” a low voice asked, looking at the screen on the phone you were holding up, the front camera facing you and raven haired male that sat next to you as you took a selfie. You had your face scrunched up, eyes rolled up to the point where the only the whites of your eyes were shown, you clicked the camera shutter.

“What’s wrong with silly pictures?” You pouted and turned to your date. As he looked back at you, he scoffed, “you call that silly? That’s more ugly than it is silly.” His tone was serious but you knew his humor consisted of roasts.

You couldn’t help but laugh and playfully hit his shoulder, “Okay, okay. We’ll take a good one.” Your hand still in position, you smiled at the camera showing teeth, while the young man smirked. Click. “There we go.” You cooed. The lights began dimming, indicating the movie was about to begin so you put your phone away.

You were amazed by the fact you were able to ask Yoongi out on a date to the cinema. You weren’t sure how to go about it but you asked your best friend, Taehyung for advice, he seemed weird about it but eventually he said to just go for it. You and Yoongi were good friends to begin with but you felt something else go on between you two (a lot of sexual awkward tension to be exact). For a while, neither of you acknowledged it, knowing it could possibly ruin your friendship, and that’s something the neither of you wanted.

Deciding to see a romantic comedy, Yoongi was first against it, but it was the only thing you could stand watching. Horror wasn’t your cup of tea, so Yoongi let it slide. To your surprise, you heard Yoongi laughing along beside you. Looking at him laughing, you couldn’t help but smile too.

Then, a sudden burst of happiness hit you. It was weird–it would happen from time to time and it’d come at the most random times. The feeling was strong and passionate that just couldn’t be ignored.

“Hey, Yoongi…” you began, but you stopped. Yoongi’s phone was vibrating in his pocket. As the screen lit up, his eyebrows knitted together, “ahh, what can I do..” he flashed his phone at you, “it’s Suran. I’ll be back.” Answering his call in a low whisper, he got up from his seat and walked while crouching, trying not to block people from veiwing the movie and walked outside of the movie theater.

All of your firey passion was gone in an instant. Your heart’s content was quickly replaced with sadness. ‘Why am I being like this..? It’s not like he’s leaving.. Ohmygod. Am I jealous?’ You felt frustrated about your own feelings. ‘No! I can’t be. They’re both my friends.’

Holding a burdensome conversation with yourself, a voice whispered into your ear, “I’m so sorry,” it was Yoongi. Making you snap out of the lonesome quarrel, you turned your head towards him, “Suran is… in need of my help. I have to go. I’ll see you later.”

To your understanding, you nodded, “alright. No worries, I hope everything’s fine..!” and with that, he rushed back out.

Trying to keep your cool, you sunk into your seat, ‘they’re both my friends… then why am I feeling like this?’ you could only ask yourself that same question over and over.

‘Next time, maybe?’ you asked yourself. The autumn night breeze blew your hair, chilling your cheeks and runny nose. The hoodie you wore under your jean jacket kept you warm. After Yoongi left, you had been in a sour mood and decided to leave without finishing the movie. You felt like you needed to take a walk, and that’s what you did. It felt nice to have some time to yourself and sort out these senses.

Getting home, you plopped down onto your bed, spreading your limbs out. Staring at the ceiling, you contiplated whether or not to text Yoongi. And after many debates, you finally decided yes. Pulling out your phone from your purse and clicking the message app, you picked Yoongi’s contact.

YOU: Hey, how is Suran doing? Is everything okay?

After a few minutes, you recieved a reply.

Yoongi-nie: Hey, everything’s fine, I guess. her boyfriend broke up with her so she needed my moral support… how was the movie? sorry i didn’t stick around long enough to see the ending. did they end up together?

YOU: oh no that’s terrible. HE DIDN’T DESERVE HER. HE’S AN ASS. I got her back, tell her that. and the movie was good. :) you lied guess we gotta redo this lil date so you can find out for yourself! haha

The reply from Yoongi took a little longer than you had hoped.

Yoongi-nie: Date? i didn’t know this was a date… i thought we were only hanging out….

What–. What the hell is that supposed to mean? Your heart was pounding hard against your chest.

YOU: Oh, hanging out? lol then do u want to go on a date sometime with me…?

At that point, you felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest. Turning your screen off, you screamed while throwing your phone to the other side of your bed. The anticipation and anxiety began to build. “WHY DID I DO THAT? JEEZ, FUCK. OHMYGOD. NOOO. FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK–” Ding! You received a message.

Quickly crawling to the other side of your bed, you flipped over your phone and rushed to unlock it.

Yoongi-nie: No. Sorry. I don’t like you like that. I always thought I treated you like my annoying little sister, but I don’t want to keep leading you on. I’m sorry but I don’t feel that way.

Your heart sunk. It was the end. Honestly, you didn’t know what you were expecting. Your life isn’t like the romantic comedies. You weren’t going to get the boy. It happens.

YOU: Ahhh. Okay. Sorry, I misunderstood. I probably made you feel uncomfortable. Thanks for telling me the truth, though. I really appreciate it.

Yoongi-nie: Are you okay? I don’t want you to be depressed or anything.

At this point, your heart felt destroyed.

YOU: OMG. Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry about it. I just need some time if that’s okay.

Yoongi-nie: Take all the time you need. Again, I’m sorry.

YOU: Don’t apologize. It’s okay, seriously. Goodnight.

Yoongi-nie: Goodnight.

Recieving that last text, you set your phone on silent and played music. You didn’t think playing your favorite songs could make you feel so sad.

———————————————————————————————————–

The next day felt draining. Although you didn’t have work, your morning wasn’t as enjoyable as it could’ve been. Doing what you usually do on your day off, you jumped into the shower. Since you had no plans of going out, you only changed into comfy sweats and a t-shirt, and tied your hair up into a pony-tail. Next, you cleaned your apartment while listening to music that blasted through your speakers. It was a good distraction until you heard a knock at the door.

Turning down the music, you took a look at yourself in the mirror that hanged in the hallway before the front door and moved away misplaced strands of hair out of your face then opened the door.

It was Taehyung wearing his baggy tan hoodie and ripped blue jeans. He had what seemed like bags filled with food in his hands. “Good morning!” He smiled. You were able to keep it together since the night before and all morning but for some reason, seeing your best friend’s face made you break into tears. “Taaaaaehyuuuuung..!” you sobbed.

The brunette’s smile was wiped off with concern and confusion, “woah, woah what happen?” He closed the door behind him and placed the bags onto the table before wrapping his lengthy arms around you.

His warm embrace made you cry into his chest even harder and hug back. All that was heard were muffled sobs. “There, there.” he said softly, stroking the top of your head. He was patient with you, he always was. And it was rare to see you cry, Taehyung knew you were a strong when it came to your feelings. Stress, frustration or even just sad movies never made you cry.

After a few minutes of ugly sobbing, you stepped back, letting go and looking up at him through your blurry vision. Taehyung looked back into your eyes and only chucked, “well that’s a sight for sore eyes.” cupping your cheeks, he wiped away your tears as you sniffed. “Are you ready to tell me what happen?”

The only response you gave him was a slow nod. Tired of standing at the door, the both of you moved the conversation to your living room, where you told him about your heartbreak.

You sat at one end of the couch in a little ball while Taehyung sat at the other end. “Ahhh… this is so embarrassing…” you sighed, rubbing your eyes and sniffed.

“Why are you embarrassed? These are your feelings. There’s nothing you should be embarrassed about.” Taehyung comforted.

You sighed once again, “ah… why did I have to fall for Yoongi? I should’ve just fallen for you instead. We’re practically married,” leaning your head against the leather cusion of the couch and giggled.

Only a corner of Taehyungs lips lifted, “that’s food for thought.” He leaned over and patted the closest limb he was able to reach, which was your foot, weird but it still felt comforting, “I don’t know what else to say but to move on–things like this happen. I don’t want to sound like a jerk and tell you this but it’s the truth,” he sighed, “and I don’t want you to keep bringing your hopes up for them to be suddenly broken down again.”

Taking a deep breath and rubbing your eyes before combing through your hair with your fingers, you looked at him, “aghhh, you’re right. I have to get over him…. and I’ll start by eating that food you brought–where it at?” you got off the couch and quickly walked to the table in the hallway where Taehyung left the bags.

Opening the bags, it felt as if the food itself was glowing and shinning on your face. Was there a choir of angels singing? Who knows but you could hear them loud and clear. All you could do was mischievously laugh to yourself, “oh, Taehyungie. You know me so well.” The bags were filled with all of your favorite snacks and drinks.

“I thought we could watch some movies and chill all day while eating junk food,” the owner of the low and husky voice popped in, watching you drool from the hallway.

You looked up at the direction it come from and smiled, “Taehyung, you have perfect timing.”

[praydastles]

Title: Something stupid Fandom: Monsta x Member: Jooheon | Minhyuk | Shownu | Kihyun | Wonho | Hyungwon | IM Genre/Warning: Song!Fic, Fluff ?? Summary/Request: Because I just really love the song “Something stupid” By Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman x A/N: This is for the #mxlyricalwritings challenge, which I am late for! I would like to apologise for that :( This didn’t turn out as I had hoped as I just wanted to get it out, but I hope everyone who reads enjoy’s! I may edit this. I will eventually post the versions for other members, separate to the challenge!   Word Count: 1629

“Something stupid like I love you”

The sun was bright as you walked by the river. Your skirt floated against the light breeze and you allowed a small smile to settle on your face as you watched the breeze pick up the fallen cherry blossoms. The start of your day was peaceful; it was one of those rare days that you had to yourself, no work and no plans, except that you were going to give yourself some well deserved relaxation. You decided that taking advantage of the weather and going for a walk was the first step to doing just that and so with your earbuds firmly in, the soft strings of an indie band setting the calming mood, you walked on with a sense of tranquillity. Of course that wouldn’t last.

“SAVED YOUR LIFE!” Your scream startled many around; the echo even startling the birds. Minhyuk’s cheery laugh filled the air, his head falling backward, toothy smile to the sky while you tried to gather your wits, a hand to your heart, his hands still holding your shoulders. You had barely got your breathing under control when you went for him. “ARSEHOLE! WHY” hit,”DO YOU” hit, “ALWAYS,” hit, “DO THAT?” hit. His laughter continued; the sound something similar to the strings playing in your ears, bright and moving as it sunk into your heart till it beat to the same rhythm. You stop hitting him when you realise your hands are doing no damage to him, not that they had any vehemence behind them anyway. Your heart was still going a hundred miles an hour as you glared at your friend, turning from him to continue walking. He pouted, although the cheeky look in his eyes showed no sign of remorse. “I’m sorry~” He dragged as he pulled your arm back and forth like a child, shaking you until you had to lightly elbow him in his stomach. He kneeled over, which you should have expected when you have a friend as over dramatic as Minhyuk. Gasping for air - fake air - he clutched his belly with one hand and tugged at the end of your skirt with the other. He looked up, a pained expression on his face, his voice became raspy as he called your name. “How could you betray me like this?” Drop. You stared down blankly at your childish friend. On the inside you were ready to burst into laughter, but you couldn’t show Minhyuk that. Instead you huffed and turned away, leaving Minhyuk face down on the floor, his hand slipping away from your skirt. “Not today Lee Minhyuk.” This time he pouted because Minhyuk was a puppy who needed affection and attention and Minhyuk’s way of attention was to be as childish as possible. He got up and ran to you, walking backward as he eventually reached you. “What’s wrong?” He tilted his head as he watched you watching the rest of the world move along. “Nothing.” His brow furrowed. He most certainly didn’t sense anything was wrong and he could usually tell, but maybe he missed something. He nodded dropping it as he placed a hand between your shoulder blades to go off the path you were currently on. You let him lead you, as always. ‘I guess I’m not going to get to relax today.’ “I’m craving some ice cream.” You grinned already knowing the direction you were both heading to. The marketplace was bustling with people as usual; shouts over the crowds of “Get ya banana’s here!” and various other things, the old ladies trying to haggle for a cheaper deal, mothers and fathers out for the day with their kids and you, almost swallowed by the crowd if it weren’t for Minhyuk, who stood behind you so he could guide you with a hand on your back. It was a little hotter here. This was the place to find various food on sale, from dumplings, to pizza, to seafood and most importantly, ice cream. You smile, seeing the bright pink store come into view and hit you with the memory of when you had first found this place. With Minhyuk. The day you both ate ice cream must’ve been the day you fell for him. It was hotter than today, the heat wrapping tightly around you, till your clothes stuck uncomfortably to your skin. For once, it was you who was talking and Minhyuk who wasn’t. The heat had made him far too exhausted and the heat had made you just the right amount of irritable that you wouldn’t stop complaining. You remember how you noticed little things about him that day, things you didn’t usually notice when he was rambling on. Like how his eyes, usually the colour of hot cocoa, warm and comforting are dull and barely bright, like the sun setting, light slowly drifting from forest trees. Cheeks usually high from his constant grin, relaxed and slightly flushed and show you just how defined his face is. His hair isn’t that different - he’s constantly running his fingers through the strands, shifting his fringe out the way, but now the silky look has become the sweaty look and you grin at how out of it he look’s, because you never could believe that someone like Minhyuk could suddenly deplete in energy. From that day on you couldn’t help but notice the little things. Like how his eye’s popped, his iris’ caramel and so easy to melt into standing out against his platinum hair. You noticed the crinkle his eyes made, lines made from his constant smile, his smile stretching his cherry coloured lips. You notice his hand, gentle yet protective when he was guiding you, you felt the tip of his other hand hover above your waist, ready to move you out of the way. He was so close at all times. His presence like static tingling over your skin and drawing you to him. Minhyuk greeted the owners with his usual smile and loud voice. Even over the sound of the bustling market his voice stuck out to you, like a chord and your mind drunk it in. You were slightly dazed, which was strange because Minhyuk usually went too fast for you to even have time to enjoy him. “Here, I think the heat is getting to you. I was trying to get you to order.” He laughed, but the crease between his brows told you he was slightly concerned and proved more so when he raised a hand to your forehead.  You took your ice cream, flushing just slightly at his soft touch and let the cool cream melt in your mouth. The sweet taste gave your mind a moment to be free of Minhyuk and instead focus on how the chocolate fused with the cream on your tongue. “Let’s go.” Minhyuk said, when the lady handed his ice cream over. You both thanked her as Minhyuk led you away to the bench area overlooking the river. You were surprised there was a free space for the both of you to sit and you breathed in deeply before sighing as you took in the still water that perfectly reflected the blue sky. The bittersweet nostalgia wouldn’t leave and the memory demanded to be verbalised as your mouth opened to bring Minhyuk into your little moment.  "Remember when we first came here? We got brain freeze from eating so fast, but if we didn’t it would have melted.“ You laugh, Minhyuk joining around a mouthful, nodding as you thought back to how as soon as the lady had handed the ice cream you both were quick to attack it before the sun could. “And then you dropped yours and nearly cried.” “I did not nearly cry!” You protested thinking back to how, as if in slow motion, your ice cream had slipped off the cone and landed with a dull splat on the concrete. How you had looked down blankly and then with more emotion as the frustration of dropping your ice cream and how it was just too hot for you to handle had made you scream in frustration, eyes watering just slightly. "And then you shared yours with me. “ you said quietly. He nodded. When Minhyuk had seen the state you were getting in he was quick to bring the ice cream toward your lips, the sweet scent bringing you out of your miserable stupor. You remember how soft his eyes were, just a hint of a smile when he saw that you too had a childish side and that ice cream seemed to be the key to bringing that out. Your lips had quivered only slightly before you had licked some after Minhyuk urged you. And that’s how you both ate. "I don’t just share my ice cream with anyone you know.” He said brow quirking. That made you smile almost as bright and wide as Minhyuk as you cheesily declared  "I know, but it’s cos you love me.“ Minhyuk started. "Exactly.”

Something changed in that moment. Your nervous laugh was met with silence, Minhyuk forgetting about his ice cream as he kept his gaze on you. You swallowed, the dryness in your mouth almost as uncomfortable as the ongoing silence.

Suddenly Minhyuk smiled, eyes bulging just slightly as he finally laughed. “What’s with the face silly?” And you felt the pink tinge your cheeks, your erratic heart tightening into a pain filled ache as you berated yourself for thinking his words were anything more than platonic.

“The time is right Your perfume fills my head”

“Heats getting to me.” you murmured, eyes drifting from his as the words died on the tip of your tongue. You didn’t want to say something stupid like I love you. 

[captain-spookycandycollecti-blog]

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"sr22 insurance quote online

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sr22 insurance quote online

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Which companies have good coverage in Philadelphia, and have affordable plans (~60-70 bucks). I'm looking at moderate deductible plans with copays for doctor office visits. Also, ...show more""

Car accident with no insurance?

I was stopped at a red light behind two cars. Both cars started to go and so did I the next thing I knew I had hit the car in front of me. The car in front of me hit the car in front of him. We all pulled over my car isnt to bad but I drive a suburban, the car in front of me was a smaller car so his looked a little worse. Nobody was hurt, and all cars were drivable, so we decided to not call the police we just all exchanged information. After we had finished and they left I immediately called my insurance lady to let her know what happened. I am not super clear on this next part, we have been going back and forth with our insurance since that call and will continue to fight it. When I called the insurance lady she said I wasnt covered. She said that they had received the last payment much later than it was due (not sure how because it was mailed the same time as always) but because of that our insurance had been cancelled. A couple of weeks ago they had chased our check, she said we were reinstated as of yesterday (the day of the accident) but because it was the same day they werent liable to pay the damages. We are going to keep fighting them because I dont think its fair. Even if they decide that they wont pay we can afford to just pay for the damages to the rear end of the car in front of us, because know matter what happened I am at fault for following to close. We cant afford to pay out of our pocket also for his front end and the rear end of the first car. Shouldnt those damages be covered by the car I hit because he was obviously following to close to the car in front of him? Im a little freaked out with all this, this is the first accident I have ever been in and we have always had insurance, so we thought. The insurance company did say they mailed us a cancellation notice but if they did we have never received one.""

What car for First car with cheap insurance?

im 17 and i want to get one of the following cars for my 1st car Vauxhall Corsa C 1.2l/Ford Fiesta zetec (Mk6)/volkswagen golf 1.4L (mk4) and my budget is 1200 and i want a car with cheap insurance and how much will i have to pay and can i pay monthly

""If my car is totalled, will the people's insurance who hit me give me kelly blue book value and take my car?,?""

I was t-boned the other day and am pretty sure my car will be totalled, it still runs great, and i love the car. the accident was the other persons fault. if it IS toatalled, will her ...show more""

How much would the insurance cost for a 2004 Subaru impreza wrx. Not sti.?

Im 17... So it normally costs more for me anyway. My dad and mom has had geico for a while now. My dad says I can't get it cuz the insurance will cost too much on a turbo car. I can't live without a turbo car!!!!!

Getting homeowners insurance in florida?

I'm considering a move to Florida sooner or later, but I wanted to ask a quick question about insurance. I'm in Mobile, Al., and it seems the region has had some skyrocketing insurance costs, both premiums and deductables. A major factor in this is the hurricanes we've had in the past six years, give or take (Yes, i know there are more factors involving costs, the overall economy being no small part). In fact, many areas can't even get insurance in the first place, because no company will write a new policy. Does Florida have the same problem? In the past decade, the state has seen much more of its share of natural disasters than my home (my city hasn't had a direct hit from any of the major storms)""

sr22 insurance quote online

sr22 insurance quote online

Health insurance in the United States?

Hi! Im not certain how things exactly work in the USA with insurance. 1) Is it compulsory? 2) Secondly, if I have insurance and suppose I want a procedure that insurance will not cover such as laser eye surgery (elective ) or say an elective cesarean. If I am willing to pay for the procedure myself can the doctor refuse to treat me and deny the procedure just because Im insurance isnt paying? Am I allowed to pay out of pocket if Im willing or is insurance legally required? Category""

My car insurance has been cancelled?

i need to know if i have to pay more or is the same amount in my billing if i pay for it this is for a car insurance the insurance company is aig

What should i look for when buying health insurance?

what sort of health insurance shld i buy and how much will it cost-i'm 18 and not earning a salary

Insurance - length of driving discounts?

So I have been driving for 3 years now (starting a couple days ago). I have allstate car insurance. I am listed as a 4 principal driver licensed 2 years and 6 months, but less than 3 years and I just called to be updated to a 0 principal driver licensed over 3 years . Will I be saving a hefty more on my car insurance? I am currently paying a premium of $776.50 every 6 months. That includes a good student discount. I am still only 19, but I will have been licensed for 3 years. Will this give me a good discount? And how much do you think it will decrease?""

Insurance when you first pass your test! WHO IS THE CHEAPEST?

I am looking to insure a citrone C2 1.1 and wonder who the cheapest place is? That question aside, Who is the cheapest to get insured with when you first pass your test? I am 18, Just passed. Steve""

Will my license hike my parents insurance?

I live in Florida with my parents, and I'm 19. I don't have a permit and want to get my license, but I'm not sure if it'll raise my parents' insurance rates. I won't own a car for at least a month or so, and I probably won't be driving theirs frequently, if at all. Will it affect their Progressive insurance at all? Thanks so much.""

""Is it normal for car insurance to cost more than the previous year, even though I made no claims?""

My insurance is coming to an end soon, I last paid 689 for car insurance and was going to consider staying with the same company and let them renew my insurance automatically but then they said that this year it would cost me 978. Isn't car insurance supposed to reduce a little each year? I know prices can change but I have not made no claims yet they are asking for over 200 more this year, is that normal? Other companies that I have used for more than a year in a row have always gone down in price each year but this one is going up?""

Why are big company's going to drop health insurance and just pay the government a fee to save money?

obama said we would be able to the same insurance. did obama lie to us?

Which is best general insurance to take?

I can pay 2000rs/annam.I need Health & Mediclaim Policy. My Requirements -- Maximum coverage of insurance.Should cover all diseases including new diseases which will come in future(i have worried about swin flu a new arraival in 2009). My age is 27years.

Cheapest auto insurance?

im shopping for auto insurance and i want to know which is the best and cheapest for a 18 year old driving a 1997 ford escort

Are you 17/18 and recently bought a car/insurance?

Im wondering what are the prices like now, and for what cars. Speaking to my mum,she told m vauxhall astra has a fairly cheap insurance for a young driver but anyway share below of around how much it costed you to get insurance and for what car thank you! 10 pts""

Insurance cost on 95 jeep wrangler?

Insurance cost on 95 jeep wrangler?

Who's insurance company do i contact the car owners or mine a driver with compresive insurance?

i was driving my wife car and parked it as i got out a car reversed into the car i am not a named driver on the insurance policy for the car but my own insurance covers me do drive other cars with owners consent. which insurasnce company do i report the accident to i was not at fault as was parked in a parking bay the other car aslo attempted to drive off

Life insurance for seniors over 75yrs?

Whats the slim chance that their is a company out there that provides life insurance for a Senior over 75 and has had and removed cancer in the past 12 months? None i bet huh?

Can anybody Reccomend a good online insurance company for a Cagiva Mito 125?

I have been looking around for a low insurance rate for my Cagiva Mito 125 Motorbike, does any Mito owners know of a good insurer for that bike and how much did you pay?""

I receive a health insurance stipend but keep it in savings instead. is this okay?

i went from being fully covered with my company in los angeles, but i moved to new york 7 months ago, where their insurance doesn't cover. in lieu of this, they give me a stipend. however, it's not nearly enough to cover cost of insurance here, so i've been putting it in a savings account until i can afford a plan in my budget and/or emergency health situations. my boss just asked me for proof of insurance. i will tell the truth of the matter, but what will happen? what can they do?""

Problems with car insurance?

Okay so I am looking for some VERY affordable auto insurance. Sounds easy right...but this is the problem...my previous insurance lapsed and I have been without insurance since April(don't worry..not driving!!) But now I am ready to drive again, and I am having a hard time finding some thats affordable...know any good ones?? Thanks ALOT!!!""

What insurance plan is most affordable and supports therapy?

Hi, I've been seeking good therapy since I was 17, I'm just wondering, what insurance plan is the most affordable as well as obviously covers therapy? Thank you""

How much would car insurance be for someone my age?

I'm 19 years old and I make about $700 a month. I'm a college student and I'm tired of having to depend on using my dad's vehicle to get to my classes. My concern is the car-insurance. I have a perfect record, but I heard that car-insurance companies stick it to younger people. Is there anyone about my age that could tell me what kind of car they have and the cost of their insurance, so that I can get a general idea of the going rates.""

What would the insurance and maintenance cost be for these cars?

1995 Ford Escort LX sedan M/T 1996 Saab 900 SE V6 Automatic 1994/1995 Saturn SL 1/2 M/T Im looking to buy my first car soon and I have found good deals on these and since I will have to pay for the car, insurance, and gas myself, overall price stays in mind.""

Where to get pregnancy insurance?

Please can someone tell me where to get pregnancy insurance? I am a UK citizen and will be spending the whole of 2010 in America (Boston). Thanks

RAC CAR INSURANCE HELP!?

I purchased car insurance from RAC last year, they then annulled it as said I could not use my no claims bonus on two cars and sent me a new quote. I rang them up and they then said I haven't sent the no claims bonus documents in so I faxed them through once again, I advised I received this letter but they said just send in the documents which I did. I also never received any documents for my cover so had to request these myself which were sent by email for 25.00 :S. After hearing nothing back I rang rac for an update who said my new insurance quote was double the original quote!! I haven't signed any paperwork or received any paperwork advising they automatically gave me new insurance. I asked them to cancel but they said I have to pay 1000 as well as them keeping my deposit and paying for the first months insurance..1000?? I told them no. Paid what i owed for the first month. Now they are sending me letter telling me to pay..do I really have to do this?? I haven't signed anything even for the original insurance as they never sent the paperwork out, and as the insurance was annulled can they really automatically start a new insurance without my permission?? Thanks in advance""

Good low cost medical insurance for a 20 year old female working through a temp service?

I am 20 years old and I have no medical insurance and I really need to go to the dentist and have a check up at my doctor. I haven't been to either in probably 4 years. I am very uneducated on insurance so any help is greatly appreiciated. I want to make sure it's someone that my doctor and dentist will accept. I have a good job but it's a temporary service that doesn't have insurance benifits. Any suggestions?

Cheap full coverage auto insurance?

Would it be cheaper to put I rent my home or just other on my insurance for my vehicle.

How much cheaper is health insurance in Texas?

Does anyone have data, did Tort reform lower health insurance costs? I mean isn't texas having a surplus or perhaps a surge of doctors since passing such law? Let's prove to the liberals this works by using the facts for a change.""

sr22 insurance quote online

sr22 insurance quote online

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