#anyways. the lying. i'm trying So Hard. i feel like this is a skill my parents should have taught me

[skrunksthatwunk]

why the fuck did i write about birds this fucking sucks. i just found out birds only sleep for a few minutes at a time, hundreds of times a day. do you know what this is going to do to my structure? the logistics of their road trip? this is already like three days late and i've been fighting for my life to get A Plot Like Any Plot That Makes Sense out and now the birds fucking sleep for 5 minutes at a time.

[solarmorrigan]

For the angst prompt if you’re still doing it:

“Don’t listen to them. Don’t you EVER listen to them.”

Please

Hello! I'm afraid this one might not have come out quite as seriously as the others (might be channeling all my Serious Angst Energy into my ongoing fic at the moment), but hopefully it's enjoyable, anyway??

[No warnings except maybe some unkind self-directed internal dialogue from Steve]

-

“Y’know,” Eddie drawls, looking Steve up and down where he’s standing in the doorway, silhouetted by the light of the front hall, “correct me if I’m wrong, but you don’t look especially busy.”

Steve, caught out in a lie, clearly having been sitting around at home in his sweats when he’d specifically told Eddie that he couldn’t come over tonight because he was busy, does the only thing he can think of: he keeps lying.

“I am,” he says.

“Uh huh.” The way Eddie draws the hum of his agreement out says that he doesn’t believe Steve in the slightest. “And what, if I may ask, are you busy with, dressed in loungewear and sitting at home?”

Scrambling, Steve reaches for the first excuse that comes to mind, something he’d heard his mother say to someone over the phone years ago, when he was still a kid and she’d still made excuses to get out of social engagements and stay home with him.

“I’m washing my hair.”

Eddie bites down on a laugh so quickly and so visibly, Steve is surprised his teeth don’t go right through his lip.

“Are you?” Eddie asks, voice gone high and tight with mirth.

“Yep,” Steve answers.

“Well, damn, I don’t know why you didn’t invite me along to help,” Eddie says, grinning at Steve. “I feel like I’ve proven my skill in that arena before.”

Steve stares at Eddie, mouth working, feeling slow and useless and out of ideas. “Uh…”

With a sigh, Eddie lets his smile drop. “Look, can I come inside?”

The jig is up, so Steve just nods and steps aside to let Eddie in.

“What are you even doing here?” Steve asks as he leads the way back to the living room, where he’d been sitting on the couch and moping.

“Steve, I knew you weren’t busy tonight. You’re kind of a terrible liar,” Eddie says.

And that isn’t strictly true; Steve is a great liar – as long as he doesn’t feel guilty about it. He’s never been good at lying to people he loves.

They sit down; Steve shoves the magazines he’d been pretending he would actually be able to focus on out of the way (more proof of his pathetic attempt at a lie), and Eddie—ever blunt, ever direct—jumps right in.

“So I kind of feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately.”

Steve winces. “Not avoiding you, I’ve just been… limiting my time with you.”

Eddie looks stricken, and Steve would like to die, actually. Why did he phrase it that way?

“Did… I do something, or say something, or, like–”

“No!” Steve rushes to reassure him. “No, no, not at all, it’s nothing you did, you’re amazing, it’s not you, it’s…”

Eddie cocks an eyebrow at him. “It’s not me, it’s you?”

“I mean…” Steve sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Kind of, yeah.”

For a long moment, Eddie sits, brows furrowed, staring at Steve. Steve fights the urge to squirm under the intensity of his gaze.

“I’m trying super hard to figure out what’s going on right now, but I’m kind of coming up blank,” Eddie finally admits. “Are we… Are we breaking up?”

“No!” Steve blurts again, reaching this time for Eddie’s hands, as if he can keep Eddie from realizing what a goddamn idiot he is and leaving if he just holds on tightly enough. “Shit, no, that’s – I’m completely fucking this up, that’s the opposite of what I want to happen, that’s why I’ve been limiting my time with you.”

Though Eddie’s hands have turned in Steve’s grip, automatically holding onto him, he stares at Steve as though he’s lost his mind, which is fair. “Okay,” Eddie says slowly, “I admit you have a little more experience with relationships than I do, but isn’t the point to spend as much time as possible with the person you’re dating? Because you like them?”

“It’s… Usually, I guess, yeah.” Steve shrugs, suddenly wishing maybe that he hadn’t taken Eddie’s hands, because now he can’t get away, can’t duck out from under those dark, searching eyes. He settles for staring down at their joined hands as he speaks. “It’s just – I can be… kind of a lot? I like someone and I just kind of slam my foot on the gas and don’t look back and that’s too much, I know, so I’ve been trying not to, like, overwhelm you, because I really, really don’t want you to get sick of me, and–”

“Who the hell told you that?” Eddie cuts in sharply.

Steve’s eyes snap back up, finding Eddie looking so thoroughly offended that he’s not sure what to make of it. “Told me what?”

“That you’re too much,” Eddie presses, his hands going tighter around Steve’s.

“Uh,” Steve says, uncertain of what kind of answer Eddie’s looking for. The fact that Steve goes all-in too quickly is just common knowledge; the fact that it overwhelms and annoys people is kind of a general consensus.

Eddie shakes his head. “Never mind, it doesn’t even matter. Don’t listen to them. Don’t you ever listen to them,” he says, low and intense. “You’re not going to overwhelm me, Steve. I can’t get enough of you. I don’t think I’ll ever have enough of you, but the only way I’m gonna know for sure is if I get to have you around as often as possible for as long as you can stand me.”

The words, for a moment, don’t make any sense. No one has ever wanted Steve around that much; no one’s ever met him where he is in terms of hunger for companionship.

“You… want me around that often?” he asks, eyes flicking from Eddie’s face to their hands and back again.

“I want you around all the goddamn time. I want you when I wake up and when I go to sleep and when I’m having breakfast and when I’m doing shit around the house and when I’m playing a show and when I’m watching TV,” Eddie rattles off. “I’m not even exaggerating, it’s honestly kind of a problem.”

“A problem?” Steve asks, brows coming together in concern.

“It’s a problem because you’ve been limiting your time, thinking that I’m going to get tired of you.” Eddie disentangles their hands and reaches up to cup Steve’s jaw, palms soft and a little sweaty from their combined grip, but gentle—almost reverent—against his skin. “Sweetheart, I am never going to get tired of you.”

From anyone else, that would be hard to believe, but the way Eddie looks at him, dead-on and so fucking sincere, Steve can’t help but take the promise in with a hopeful flutter in his chest. He leans forward, pressing his mouth to Eddie’s, keeping the kiss chaste and slow before he pulls back to murmur, “Promise?”

“Promise,” Eddie answers immediately. “I promise, I promise, I promise.”

He tugs Steve forward after that, pushing and pulling him until he’s managed to lay out across the length of the couch and has situated Steve over him, lying on his chest like a weighted blanket. He sighs and wraps his arms around Steve, like he still wants to pull him closer.

“Perfect,” he says.

“Yeah?” Steve asks, balancing his chin Eddie’s sternum so he can smile up at him.

“Mhm,” Eddie hums. “Now I just have to figure out how to keep you this close all the time.”

“Might be kinda tough,” Steve says, fighting to keep his smile from growing to ridiculous proportions.

“Eh.” Eddie shrugs, ducking down to press a kiss to Steve’s forehead. “I’m willing to take the time to figure it out.”

And somehow, Steve thinks that might be the most romantic thing anyone’s ever said to him.

[running-with-kn1ves]

Hi! Could you write something about a yan!best friend but this time he's the one who's the virgin instead of reader and reader is the one who is teasing him etc. Like your other yanbsf fic but the roles are flipped. Maybe he's flirty and teasing so reader assumed he got around but he's actually only that way around them and a huge dick to everyone else. And as they're having sex, he's rough because he hates that reader slept with other people before. Thinking of it now, this prompt also fits yan!bf because of the insecurity but I'll leave it to you. Thanks! Your writing always helps me get though a tough week :)

A/N: this prompt got me too interested for me to pass it up; I'm so glad my writing is helpful to you anon, and i hope this was what you were looking for:)

TW: Literally just smut, hardly proofread, possessive behavior, experienced! reader, virgin! Yandere, handjob,

“Don’t start.” Your best friend threatens, giving you a “i'm done with your shit” glare. 

His seemingly upset gaze passed back and forth from your eyes, to your hand. But despite his disagreeable tone, his hands stay limp at his sides, and his legs are still open at a leisurely position. 

“Why? I thought you were so confident in your… skills.” You scoff at the end of your sentence, watching your friend writhe uncomfortably as your hand caresses him. “Don’t tell me you’ve been lying this whole time….?”

You grin at seeing him frown, seeing his unhappy glare that really seems to hold a hidden bit of excitement, especially as you feel something begin to grow more shapely within your palm. 

“I haven’t lied about anything!” He blurts out suddenly, “I just-- I didn’t, say that I’ve actually.. DONE anything…” 

“Don’t tell me--” You begin to cackle, unable to hold back your laughter as you watch his face morph into an expression of sheer embarrassment. 

“Don’t laugh at me!” He shouts, grabbing the hand that thats been touching him so intimately.

“Why not, you’re a virgin who’s lied about sleeping with more than half of everyone we know!” You snicker, laughing into your opposite palm while your other has ceased its sensual movements. 

Forcing your hand back down, your best friend jerks you close. 

“If I’m really just some loser, why don’t you see how well your so-called “experience” works on me, huh? Or are you too much of a wuss to try,” He watches you try to hold back another laugh, angrily frowning.  “Maybe you’re not as good as you think; not as good compared to a virgin, anyway.”

“Oh, is that a challenge?” You ask grinning, reading his nervousness as he licks his lips in anticipation. 

“Its.. its whatever you want to take it as.” He says stubbornly, looking away. “And I haven’t lied about anything, I just… stretched the extent of things I may have done… with some people….” 

You try to hold back another laugh, resuming your experimental touches on the front of his jeans. You’ve noticed how increasingly hard he’s gotten since you started, how tight his pants have gotten around his thickness; though its not like it took very much to get him excited, having only ever received the touch of his own hand. 

Your best friend licked his lips again, letting out a huffed breath through his nostrils as you cupped his crotch. 

“So a liar and a virgin… Turns out you’ve been hiding quite a few things from me.” You cut him off before he tries to refute you again. “But that doesn’t really matter now, does it? Because you won’t be either, once we’re finished. 

“But I-I,” He stutters, watching you look him up and down, seeing how his hips have begun to lift forward in an attempt to meet your hand.

“You’ve bragged about so little… I’m sure we can manage to bring some truth to your fabrications.”

You get close, watching his desperate lips part in an attempt to call in yours. You lean in just close enough to keep him trying to close the gap, creating a bit of distance each time. You almost catch him in a kiss but lean upward, brushing your nose against his as he pants in frustration. 

“Stop-- teasing me..” He grunts, trying to keep his mouth shut. You pull away from his grinding hips, tip-toeing your fingers up to his pants buttons. You try to open them slowly, unzipping his pants zipper as he watches you. But your best friend doesn’t have the patience that you hoped. He unbuttons himself before you can, the bulge in his boxers coming to rise and push against his pants. 

“So needy for being an untouched virgin, are we? I thought you were more patient than that.” 

He looks away in embarassment, hiding behind his forearm. Your hand slides from his soft, warm tummy to the thickness in his boxers. The moment you grab it, he lets out a guttural moan, pushing his lips in his arm to avoid from getting too loud. 

You reach for his jaw with your free hand, pulling him away from his hiding spot. He looks at you with a parted, heaving mouth, watching as if you had the key to everything he could ever want. You give him a sweet kiss, one that he easily accepts, pressing up against your mouth with an insatiable fervor, gently bringing his hand down to push yours under his boxers. 

You pull away his hand from yours,pushing it against the backside of the couch with your free hand.

“Rule one you have to learn, don’t touch the master while they’re working.” You grin, giving a slow pump to his delicate, untouched cock. 

But instead of the submissive, lust-hazed look you were expecting, your bestfriend hardens his gaze. Pulling you by your hips, he forces you from your knees on the couch to his lap, letting them straddle him and keeping your hand down his pants. 

“Its not fair,” He murmurs, gripping the fabric around your thighs. “T’s not fair someone else got you fuck you first…”

He ruts up against your clothed crotch, allowing your hand to slide against his member. His thrusts into your hand grow harder, rougher as he watches you through hazy eyes and fallen hair strands. 

“You're as desperate as any virgin…” You smirk, watching him lean his head back after you brush your thumb against his tip. “But you’re as stubborn as a mule.”

 That action and your confident words only seems to spur him on, his heavy thrusts growing violent as his hand moves to grip the back of your shirt, the other coming up to meet your crotch. 

“I only learn from the best.” He says, gritting his teeth and trying his best to unbutton your shorts. “Now, I thought you said you’d teach me everything that I “fabricated”?” 

You lift an eyebrow, hearing him let out another groaning huff, getting close to his release. 

You lean in to satisfy his need to kiss you again, watching as bites his lip at a thought.

“Besides, I need to fuck you hard enough that you forget about those before me.”

[hermit-lover]

PLATONIC REQUEST (If you include any romance I will be sad.) Reader who is adventurous and curious, loving science and fantasy in equal measure—so long as no one tries to misapply them and claim falsehoods are factually true or that stories always need to be scientifically perfect. Intentionally tries to pick up lots of skills. Innocent and childish. Intelligent, but uses internal fact checking to discern lies, which obviously has limitations when trying to determine if someone is lying about *themself.* Reader is friends with Scar and/or Etho. (So, personally, those two are my favorites right now, and I wish I could be friends with both of them. Approximately everyone who knows me in Real Life is unsurprised by this, because both of them are a type of person I like, and both of them have traits I like and want to cultivate in myself. 🤷‍♀️ Or at least, everyone would be unsurprised if I were the type of person to talk about having squishes [that's the word for wanting to be friends with someone, like a platonic crush] but I tend to keep my emotions about myself to myself, so only a few actually know.) Anyway, I think that the differences between Etho and Scar can be really interesting. Of course, you can choose to only include one of them in the resulting Reader Insert story, if asking for two Hermits is too much, or you don't feel familiar enough with one of them to write for them, etc. Other than the Reader being friends with one or both of the requested characters, you can have a lot of free will in the type and genre of the piece. Want to write silly fun times? I'm down! Want to write an adventure piece? Those are some of my favorites! Want to write about Reader helping the selected character(s) (or vice versa?) Sounds good to me! In the mood to write angst or hurt/comfort? I'll accept that too! Anyway, if this was all too long, or too vague, or too dull, or you have any questions—you can message me and ask questions or request that I send in a better request myself! 😅 Thank you for your time, consideration, and potential writing!

Fetching Wood!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Character: Ethoslab x Reader, GTWS x Reader.

Type: Blurb (~2k)

Theme: Platonic

Summary: Unsurprisingly, attempting an adventure on the HermitCraft server attracts shenanigans.

TW: brief swearing.

A/N: I hope I did your ask justice!! These two are so silly together and so adventure awaits. :)

The chirping of birds drifts through the ajar window, letting in the sounds of morning calamity and the gentle breeze that brings with it the scent of deep woods and dirt. Your cluttered desk stands proudly in front of you, stacks of intricate designs meticulously sketched, bottles of experimental potions, gadgets, gears, suspicious white powder, and ink spattered across the solid dark oak. It was your workshop- or at least part of it. At the moment you are preoccupied from tinkering, rather you squint at the mess of your storage trying to decide what exactly this trip warrants.

You see, your build, a large wizard-esc tower and subsequent dungeons was a rather demanding feat, and with your newfound appreciation for the Nether woods and brick, you needed a trip to Nether.

It was much to your surprise that when casually discussing the idea with those surrounding you, your neighbor Etho was quick to jump aboard. Apparently he too needed a restock on warped logs and mushrooms, and was more than happy to tag along to make the process more enjoyable.

It was always exciting seeing the ivory haired man, so many Hermits (including yourself) looked up to him.

With the whole HermitcraftTCG and Decked Out craze of last season he was a hard man to come across besides fleeting moments in games. You would be lying if you said you weren't eager to impress. Tucking another fire resistant potion (you can never be too sure) you sigh and check the time.

No...it couldn’t be that hour already...

Snatching up your backpack and skittering towards the door of your starter-starter base (something you will be tearing down) you made it out into the grass. You were so smart when it came to inventions you'd think you would be a little more aware of the time- but unfortunately not. Being late was an reality you lived with often. Snatching the reins of your beloved horse Millennium, you place a foot in the stirrup and very nearly faceplant off of the other side of his torso. He lets out a vibrating huff and you pout.

“Cmon, I can't have a horse making fun of me.” You scoff, rightening in the saddle. The horse doesn't comment back, shaking out its mane and beginning to trot. You ease Millennium into a canter, riding with practiced ease through the forest towards your neighbor.

It's a bright and sunny day, the wind whipping across your face and tugging at your clothing where it is free from the confines of your armor. You had asked Cleo and Stress to help in making a perfect outfit to combine the high fantasy of the wizard tower with the stylish ease of a scientist. You say they have done wonderfully. Despite not actually having a tower to call home yet, you were eager to leap into the aesthetic.

Spotting the gorgeous blue ceiling you broke into a grin, pressing a bit harder to have your horse break into a dash. Leaping over a small creave you break into the clearing, spotting the man of hour leaning against the side of the portal- a full one with corners and all of course. He straightens at your sudden appearance, watching you with careful eyes- You stand up in the stirrups, throwing a leg over and slowing the horse to let you jump off. Millennium whinnies and turns, slowing to blink at you. You hit the ground with a small ‘oof!’ knees bending to not topple over.

“Tadaaa!” You wiggle in the ever-corny jazz hands, watching his expression crinkle into a smile. His light chuckle makes you beam in pride.

“Woooow what an entrance.” Etho claps slowly, muffled by his fingerless gloves. It was almost sarcastic but it amused him nonetheless. “Almost makes up for the fact you're late- huh?” He prods, clearly in a teasing manner. You pout.

“Only by-” You check your watch. “Half an hour!” It's defensive, but you stick your tongue out to show no harm.

“Mhm, still late.” He turns sharply on his heels, now facing the portal. “We better start moving so we still have daylight!”

“It’s 9:30, plus we’re going to Hell- No sunlight there.” You quickly tie up Millennium, taking a tic to admire the build. Pacing quickly to catch up beside him, you note vaguely that he didn't move, instead throwing a coy smile (Hermits got used to only reading his eyes) down at you before stepping into the swirling purple depths. It was always nauseating, the world thrown off kilter and shapes fluttering behind your eyes. Then the pure heat- it prickles your palms immediately with sweat and makes you wipe them on your pants as you step out onto the odd red stone, slightly squishy under foot. It was an eyesore as always, the usual red cavern punctuated by glowing portals and scattered cobblestone paths.

“Sooooo.” You drawl, turning to face him- he looks odd in the environment. Pale skin and stark haired reflecting the orangish hues of ever-burning fire. Greens of his outfit reminding you much of the holiday season. “Lead the way captain.” You prompt- the notification of ‘Going deeper’ noting your lack of experience in this particular world. He chuckles, but sets off, picking around fires and large craters. You follow to a tee, analyzing the scenery in an attempt to memorize it for later. You've almost committed this well populated spawn area when a panicked scream breaks through the crackling silence. Jumping out of your skin you launch towards Etho- sword drawn. But that scream…It wasn't a ghast-

“NO NO IM SORRY I KNOW I FORGOT GOLD JUST SPARE A SCAR ONE SECOND!-” Hightailing from around a corner the offender nearly knocks into you, letting out a yelp. Scar’s eyes are wide, his expression that of pure terror, cheeks dusted in the same red dust as the scenery. A tic goes by as you open your mouth to speak, at the same moment he realizes you're friendly, dashing to cower behind you. The sound of a crossbolt loading pulls your attention from the man. The piglin snorts, eyes narrowed in bloodlust, weapon drawn as it searches for presumably Scar. Tattered tunic and scraped golden boots. You and Etho had planned accordingly- a gold dawning his boots as you opted for golden bracers- but a quick glance at Scar confirms he had in fact forgotten. Flicking your sword you swipe at the beast. Blade forcing it backwards. It squeals in surprise, having not seen you as a target. The crossbow rounds to your chest, you brace for pain. Then another blade cuts through the air. The piglin lets out one last squeal as it dissolves quickly into mist. Crossbow and leather toppling to the floor. You let out a breath and look to your savior with a pout.

“I totally had it handled!” You insist, poking him in the chest with a finger. It slides uselessly off of his iron chestplate. Etho blinks at you, then shakes his head.

“Uh no, you were totally doomed and in need of a strong PvPer to defend you.” his quirked head shows his comfortable ease, and it warms you that he liked bantering. Too bad you were about to murder him.

“Oh? Do you know one I can bring next time?” You ask, batting your eyelashes innocently. He gawks.

“Oohhh!-”

“This is fun and all but do you have any food and gold I can borrow?” You had forgotten about him. Turning to Scar you flash him a grin, digging in your pockets for food.

“Didn't expect to save a charming Scar this fine morning.” You chuckle, offering some of the steak you gathered to his shaking hands.

“Well I didn't expect to be in peril- I knew I had forgotten something!” He eagerly crams the food into his mouth, chewing as he talks around the bite. “Good thing Etho came to save me.” It's a tease- but you still squawk.

“hEY-!” The unholy noise grates your throat, and causes him to nearly choke on the mouthful, swallowing hard to avoid choking. His muffled giggles tug a smile to your lips. “You're an ass.” You spit, turning sharply away from him. “And to think I was going to share my bracers. Guess not!”

“Wa-Wait!” Scar stumbles to bump against your back, straightening himself to not invade your space too much. “You wouldn't leave a helpless scar all on his own?” His voice tilts into a whine, widening his eyes to plead. You scoff, gesturing vaguely to Etho.

“You have an Etho, isn't he enough for you?” You snark back, Scar is silent. He sulks to the Canadian, throwing an arm across his shoulder to begin his sales pitch.

“Ethhooo my buddy, you wouldn't happen to have some gold I could borrow?” Scar tries, offering a meek smile to the taller man. Etho hums, tilting his head to peer across the blazing landscape.

“Nope.” He pops the p, eyes squinting into what must've been a shit-eating grin. Scar groans, letting his knees buckle in exaggerated disappointment. Etho shifts to slow his descent, the uniformed man sliding helplessly to the red floor.

“Need me yet?” You call, shifting to spin and stare at the off pair. Scar groans again, but lifts his arms to grabby-hands. Splitting into a grin you trot towards him, sliding off one golden clasp. His fingers barely brush the surface before you snatch it away. “Nuh uh!- you gotta say I’m better than Etho.”

“Hey!” Now it was Etho's turn to protest, placing a hand on his hip. “You can't make Scar lie.”

“Then I guess he won't get any gold.” You shrug, Scar sputters. Using Etho as a pole to claw his way back up.

“Uh- I didn't say that, I think you're incredibly talented and definitely better than any old Etho.” He smiles, flashing his teeth. You hum now, swinging the gold bracer around. Scar winces every time it nearly slips from your grasp.

“Yea alright.” You toss the accessory and he lunges for it, fumbling for a few moments before managing a firm grasp.

“Oh thank you kind and generous-”

“Alright, that’s enough horsing around, we are already running behind schedule.” Etho interrupts, trotting back on path. You groan in childlike disobedience, but follow along. Scar stumbles to catch up.

“What are you guys doing?” He asks, keeping pace but tucking close to the protection of your side.

“Fetching wood.” You answer, giving him a nudge. “What were you up to?”

“Oh! Same here!” Scar answers confidently. You give him a once over. He doesn't appear to have even successfully made it to the biome, judging by the lack of mycelium on his boots. Raising an eyebrow skeptically he chuckles. “Well I was going to…”

“There's always space for another.” Etho butts in, clasping him on the shoulder. “Even if the role is just the goof.”

You giggle, causing Scar to shoot you a glare.

“I am more than just that!- I can be the entertainment, have you seen the most recent news about Mando?-”

You grin, a small excited noise leaving your throat. Etho groans loudly, retreating a safe distance to let you geek out. He knows the consequences of getting too close, being dragged into full body renditions of scenes.

Despite the blistering heat and hostile atmosphere, a few friends never fail to lighten the mood. You always feel safer when tucked between their shoulders, endless chatter filling the air. And maybe some shenanigans and mishaps occur along the way- but that's the fun of HermitCraft.

[ineffectualdemon]

I'm dealing with a bit of feeling like a fake about my own low mood.

I think it's because when I was younger if I felt like I did right now (dissociating, depressed, suicidal ideation, despair, wanting to isolate) I just wouldn't function.

Nothing could convince me to get out of bed and get moving or take care of myself

But I'm not the me of 15 years ago. I have had intensive therapy and worked really really hard to have coping skills that actually serve the me of right now.

So even though I still want to lie in bed all day I can force myself to get up and shower and eat (at least a little) and do things I need to do.

I'm not happy about it but I also know it would make me better and not worse and just lying in bed all day will definitely make me worse. So I'm grumpy and angry as I act as my own zookeeper

It's not that I'm not actually dealing with very low mood. It's just that now I have the skills to deal with it that I didn't have back then. I know what actually motivates me over what I tried that didn't.

I don't try to guilt myself out of bed. Instead I break it into smaller tiny tasks and call myself a good girl and a brave boy for getting them done

Which is dumb but it also works so who cares.

Anyway I just think it's interesting

[turvi]

Promises-2

For the first time in months, Y/n was somehow able to get a fully rested sleep. Severus had a spare room for her that he used to store ingredients and utensils for his potions. The room had a small library filled stacked with books from up to bottom and one small bed that was lit by moonlight.

Despite all the things Severus had stuffed in this room it still had enough space to move around. Severus quickly dusted the bed despite it looking quite clean. It looked like Severus used this room for his restless nights in the company of his favourite books with the moon overlooking him.

"This room can feel stuffy so feel free to open the window" he suggested now standing there fiddling his fingers. Before Y/n could say another word he interrupted

"If you need anything feel free to ask me I am up anyways"

Y/n nodded and Severus was out of the room in no time letting Y/n settle down in the new environment. Y/n reminisced about the last time she met Severus and how has not changed a bit, if anything his eyes looks softer than before, kinder, sadder.

She got up from the comforts of his bed, his smell so present it felt like he was there but the cold sheets said otherwise. She thought of making breakfast, it was the least she could do. She had to make herself busy it was the only way to keep her mind from spiraling into dark thoughts.

As she carefully walked down the stairs she saw Severus up and working on a potion on his makeshift table in his room. Guilt filled her heart. She felt like she was taking advantage of Severus while he was just happy with the organically grown ingredients he was using.

She went to the kitchen and saw dishes piled up in the sink. She went ahead and tried to wash them as quietly as she could. Soon she knew shy everyone called Severus a dungeon bat as he sneaked up on her and almost scared her to death.

"I'm sorry Severus I disturbed you" she gasped trying to calm her heartbeat.

"No, you didn't but why are you washing the dishes Y/n"

"You helped me Severus it is only right I help you too"

He sighed and pinched his nose bridge. He thought why can't everyone be just like him. What is the point of being so nice?

"Go sit down I'll make breakfast for you"

"You will not eat?"

"I am already late for school Merlin knows Potter and his little army will make my day hard" he complains to you. He would be lying if he said he didn't like that someone was listening to his complaints. On most days he wished the walls had ears.

"Potter that name sounds familiar"

"Yes he is the son of James and Lily Potter, great people" he snarled

"Really? Oh how lovely" you said thinking he actually meant that

Severus stared into the void questioning his existence. He really asked Merlin today how come he gets to meet such people but then again he never saw you at Hogwarts, he didn't know who you were you were just there.

"Would you mind if I ask you a question?" He asked plating her breakfast. He placed the plate in front of her and sat across from her. It felt weird having company. This felt very intimate yet Severus tried to focus on the question.

"You can" you replied with a sweet smile. Severus never saw you smile. He is glad he did now.

"I never saw you at Hogwarts yet you are somehow connected to its happenings how?"

You took a deep breath. You know you had to tell him. There is no point in hiding it. The man gave you shelter when you needed it the most no question asked. You looked up to see he was waiting patiently.

"I perform ....black magic, my mother taught me, she used it to cure people and it is one of the things that remind me of her. One day a man came by my place. He was pale and very sickly. He told how no healer had been able to heal him. So he was under my shelter until he was back on his feet." You looked back to find Severus still listening to you his finger fidgeting. "He told me his name was Tom Riddle. He was impressed by my skills and told me a powerful witch like me had been using her powers incorrectly," she said wiping away the stray tear that fell down her cheek.

"One stormy night he came back, he killed my mother. He told me I had to be on his side and make him victorious. He tortured me every night since that night and made me use black magic for the wrong purposes." Severus panicked when she started sobbing, he hesitantly held her hand which felt warm against his cold palms.

"I am sorry I didn't mean to hurt you, I just needed to understand your situation"

"It's alright Severus you don't need to apologize I can understand it is just too much and I am scared for the first time in months I felt fully rested last night, usually woken up by a nightmare or just couldn't fall asleep because news got out that the Dark Lord is returning." her voice broke.

Severus looked at the time and now the professors will start asking him questions, but he couldn't leave you like this.

"Would you like to come to Hogwarts? You can sit in the library, we have some creatures I can ask Hagrid to let you meet them, you can sit in my office albeit it can get boring." Severus never thought he would ever get to brag about Hogwarts but he knew you were hurting and thought about things that helped him distract from his harsh reality.

"You wouldn't mind that?" your voice was low and Severus was thankful it was usually quiet in his house.

"Not at all, you can get some sunlight, and meet others, especially Minerva," he added awkwardly he just hoped you were comfortable

"Thank you for being nice to me Severus"

"No Y/n I have to thank you, well now I know how you were able to heal my wounds so quickly, but you wiped my tears and reminded me that I have some good left in me, that I am not the monster everyone thought I was." his breath hitched when you got closer to him not breaking eye contact. Your eyes looked so beautiful under the sunlight Severus thought.

When you touched his arm he flinched but quickly calmed "You are a great man Severus I know it because you regret the mistakes you made and you are willing to correct them"

He nodded and looked away from your eyes "I... uh we need to leave now"

"Sure I will get ready quickly" with that you took the last bite of your breakfast and beelined towards your room. Severus watched you retreat, he wishes he doesn't get attached to you, that won't go well

A/N: REBLOGS AND FEEDBACK IF YOU ENJOYED THIS. TAKE CARE.

[dr-spectre]

man i saw your last two posts and i wanted to tell you, you're not cringe, and you're not unlovable

i've had like, one full conversation with you going back and forth on both shared and unshared interests and it had a profound effect on me at the time

I need to unlearn shame, i need to be more open with what i fixate on and what i'm doing (and also the realization i'm definitely on some kind of spectrum), from one chat with someone *loud and proud* like you, how fucking crazy is that?

I hardly know you personally, but it's not hard to gauge how awesome you are, in face of your perceived faults, several of which i share myself, you yap so much but you're so genuine and passionate i and pretty much everyone who sticks here loves to read it, it never gets old, it never gets annoying

you put your whole pussy into innocuous little things about the subject matter, and it's a wonderful thing

you can find friends, you can find love, and you deserve both of those things

this is a little long but it's sentiments i've had for awhile now but no good opportunity to share......

I.... I..... WHA.

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY TO THIS?!?!?! YOU CAN'T DROP THIS IN MY INBOX LIKE THAT!!!

LISTEN... ITS JUST.... I aint awesome!!! Im some 20 year old autistic dude who's too obsessed with a squid woman! How's that awesome!!?!?!? I haven't made an impact on anything... not on the community... not on inkipedia... not on anyone... I have 300 followers... that's nothing...

...or have i?!?! There's no way I could have had an impact on someone... hell even SEVERAL PEOPLE! I just overanalyse stuff that seems so cut and dry but... people are actually positive about my stuff? People say to me that I changed the way they see this important character to me.... BUT THERE'S NO WAY RIGHT?!?!? I still feel like a drop in the ocean. Just a spec of dust!!! I haven't made real change yet... OR HAVE I?! I DON'T KNOW!!! WAAAHHHH!!!

Maybe.... maybe if I have changed one person's perspective, then maybe it was worth it in the first place...

You know. I wanna say that the reason I came to tumblr was because my irl friends aren't into Splatoon and my family gives me a meh shoulder shrug to my interest. It was so difficult for me to explain Splatoon to my parents when Splatoon 3 came out and I picked up the game at launch! So I went here because I felt like it was the best place to express myself. And yeah I'm glad I stuck with it honestly.

I get why my irl friends aren't into Splatoon, they need to buy a multi hundred dollar console that's about to get replaced soon just to play 2 games. And trying to explain to them Nintendo Wii U and Switch emulation is just... I dont even wanna attempt that HAHAHAHA!!!! So I often felt lonely and it felt like I was screaming into a void when talking about Splatoon to them in a discord server. I guess that's where my sense of loneliness comes from.....

I genuinely have NO ONE in real life to talk to about my interests and have someone ACTUALLY listen. I guess that's why I feel cringe and not cool at all. My interests are so nerdy and I'm on the spectrum, my social skills are like D tier. I genuinely cannot talk about myself, i really cant. Its why i have never been in a romantic relationship before.... As a 20 year old dude, that shit fucking stings I'm not even gonna lie. I think about that shit every day. LITERALLY EVERY DAY I'M NOT LYING!!!!

But anyways, I'm getting way too personal on the internet. I don't wanna be some sad sap.

Thank you. Seriously, thank you. I'm not sure if I truly feel like I deserve love but. Thank you anyways. I guess it is a good quality to have that I can ramble and yap and become really focused on something, even if it's not adult things like... getting a job, paying taxes or whatever HAHAHAHA!

[ticklish-n-stuff]

Yes, I shall! Sakura, could you pleaaase write something for Ler Dazai! Many please and thank yous!

Ler!Dazai x gn!reader

I wrote this at 4 am bc I got hit with inspiration and lee mood go brr

Still, I hope you likey~

___________________________________________

Dazai x gn!reader (romantic)

Lee: reader

Ler: Dazai

Warnings: Tickles!

___________________________________________

You were currently at your shared apartment with Dazai, found laying on the bed on your stomach while scrolling on your phone and kicking your feet back and forward like a school girl.

Dazai walked into the scene, a smirk forming on his face. In a swift motion, he flopped himself down on top of you. His tall, slender body keeping you trapped.

"Gyah! D-Dazai?! What are you doing...?"

"I could ask you the same! Whatcha got there?~" he wrapped his arms snuggly along your waist, making you feel even more trapped and flustered. Your cheeks grew darker as he nodded over to what you were reading on your phone.

"Uhh... nothing?" you gave off a nervous smile. It didn't take a genius to know you were lying, or in this case, feeling too embarrassed to admit that you were reading tickle fanfiction of all things! Oh and to be caught in the act by your one and only suicidal maniac...

"Aww c'mon, it can't be THAT embarrassing~" he chuckled as he easily snatched your phone away, taking a glance at the screen. You quickly covered your face in pure embarrassment, not knowing how he'd react. After a moment, you heard another chuckle escape his lips, except it sounded more sinister. "Hehe~ Is my sweet belladona too embarrassed to ask me to tickle them?~" even though you couldn't see his face, you could clearly picture the teasy, smug look on it.

"It's not that hard! You just gotta say: "Dazai-kun, please tickle me!~" he snickered at his own dramatization. Then, he leaned down to whisper in a low voice near your ear "Besides... I'm sure you'd prefer the real thing instead of just reading it...~".

Before your brain could even process what just happened, his nimble fingers climbed up your sides, giving it light yet firm squeezes.

"GAH—!" you couldn't control the loud gasp that spilled out of your mouth. The touch causing you to squirm under him, not like you could get away anyways.

"Look at you, so sensitive~ It almost seems like you like it! Oh wait...~" he giggled along with you as his fingers glided all over your back, making you arch and squeal in ticklish glee.

"Nahaha! D-Dazahahai...!" your legs frantically kicked from behind. As much as you hated to admit it, you loved every moment of this. Your face fell on the mattress, trying to muffle all the funny sounds that escaped your lips. Although it just made Dazai want to tease you more.

"Oh? Did I hit a sensitive spot?~" he grinned cheekily as his short nails lightly scratched at your shoulder blades. Going all around them and making sure to go between them too.

"EEK—! PFFT! AHAHAHAHAHA!" you couldn't protest even if you wanted to. All that came out was that gorgeous, uncontrollable laughter as your body involuntarily jerked around underneath your partner.

"You seem to really like it here, I mean just listen to those squeals!~" with that, he dug in slightly harsher to intensify the sensation, chuckling when he got the desired sound he was looking for. He then went back to more light caresses, enjoying your quiet giggles and the way your body twitched with each touch.

"D-Dazai plehehease..." you felt your body go limp. Once he noticed you stopped struggling, he stopped his tickly assault and got off of you. He felt quite proud of his tickling skills when he saw your panting, red face.

"So... did you like that?~".

As you started to calm down, you looked up at him, although you quickly averted your gaze as the embarrassment started hitting once again. Still, you gave a shy nod to his question. He then gently grabbed your hand and looked at you with a more genuine, warm smile. "Hey... if you ever wanna be tickled again, don't be afraid to ask".

The gentleness in his voice managed to calm down your nerves a bit, but of course that didn't last long as he went back to his teasing self. "Besides, you're so adorable when you squirm like that~" he teased, playfully booping your nose.

That surely didn't go as you expected, but it sure was better than what you could've ever hoped for.

___________________________________________

I didnt proofread bc tired. I hope this is okay akdhskdhsjdb

[changingplumbob]

New Goth: Chapter 4, Part 6

James practices his dad skills with some uncle time.

CW: Low Level sim spice. Content Warning Guide

To wind down from the social worker interview James decides to see if any of the fishing crew are free for the afternoon. He looks in the lake opposite his house while he waits for them to show up. Nothing too tricky in there, maybe he could catch something for Alexander to cook.

Harvey: Adoption eh

James: Yeah. Ophelia and I didn’t have kids but, I want to leave behind someone I’ve raised

Harvey: I can get that. I’m the same, keep hoping mine will announce impending grandfather-hood

James: The young do things in their own time

Harvey: I guess, when I think of being in my twenties it feels like lifetimes ago

James: I know what you mean

James: Where is your son anyway

Harvey: He said something about needing the internet. I thought the internet was what we had on our phones

James: No I think that’s wifi

Bob: That’s data actually

James: *sighs* I don’t know, technology keeps changing. Now fishing, that’s something that has remained the same

The group murmur in agreement as they enjoy the moment of peace.

James: Hello girls

Savannah: Good afternoon Uncle James

Mercedes: Hi Uncle James

James: What are you two doing here

Savannah: Papa had to go into the lab today for work so mama told us to get the bus here after school

Mercedes: She doesn’t think we’re old enough to look after Viola and nana says the three of us are a handful for her

James: I’m afraid I agree with your mama, come on in

Savannah: I’m going to go find Milton. Try and show him a proper doll story

James: How about you Mercedes? You like math right? Care to play some chess

While James and Mercedes face off on the chess board Savannah and Milton play with the dollhouse.

Savannah: I didn’t realise you can wear bear suits to your school

Milton: I can wear whatever

Savannah: I wish that was us

Mercedes: Having unicorns (uniforms) can be fun

James: And why is that

Mercedes: *grins mischievously* The teachers have trouble telling us apart

James: Fancy that

Savannah: Well our main teacher can tell but not the other ones

Rahul swings by to pick the twins up as Alexander gets home and heads for the kitchen. He’s considering what to cook when Milton comes to find him.

Milton: Can I help with dinner

Alexander: Sure. I just need to figure out what to make

James: Make some Poke bowls, I caught some fresh fish today

Alexander: Okay, meal is set. Milton grab the stool so you can reach the counter

Milton drags over the step and is at a proper height to work on the counter. Alexander provides help here and there but since he’s preparing his own ingredients it’s mainly James who makes sure Milton doesn’t get his paws dirty.

James: Mrs Ali said she’ll accompany her here for dinner tomorrow

Milton: Is she trialling us or are we trialling her

Alexander: Both I imagine, sweets?

James: Yes. It’s a chance for us to make sure we don’t clash with her, and it’s a chance for her to meet us before agreeing to stay

Milton: Did the social worker say what she’s like

James: I imagine she’ll keep us on our toes, but she’s not mean, I made sure

Alexander: Why don’t you think about what you want to ask her tomorrow Milton? Then you'll have some stuff prepared

Milton seems pleased at this idea, although it is hard to judge his feelings in the bear suit. Following dinner for humans and cats James makes sure to fit in snuggle time with his furbabies.

After making sure Milton gets to sleep James finds Alexander in their office finishing the day's work column.

Alexander: She’ll keep us on our toes will she

James: Mrs Ali did say she can be competitive for attention, and tricks gullible people, but we can handle that. When I tell you her background you'll understand

Alexander: You have faith in my abilities to handle her?

James: Yes I do. You’re sharp, you’ll see through fictions I imagine, and you’ll have me. If there’s something I can spot it’s a lying teenager

Alexander: I'm finished here so... care to go and pretend we’re still lying teenagers

James: And what would we be lying about

Alexander: My level of experience? And our relationship status

James: *laughs* Do you need me to teach you again

Alexander: What can I say? I’m just a boy in love with my tutor

Yeah... they go woohoo.

With an important dinner coming up Hamlet and Gertrude get some cute new threads. Hamlet opts for a tidy sweater while Gertrude gets a fancy dress that she’s happy to sleep in. Milton pats Hamlet before heading off for school, Alexander assures James he won’t work late and eventually James starts to vacuum the mansion. He wants to make a good impression on Ariadne, can’t have her thinking she’d be living in a pigsty. Or that he would expect her to clean like some sort of Cinderella character.

Of course as a retiree James can spend a large chunk of his day living my dream, snuggling cats. He also likes programming and from chats with Joey feels like he should try to teach himself. There are a few online courses but Joey emailed copies of his old coursework for James to get a ground level understanding of coding. Both cats stay near despite Gertrude being aloof, she’s James companion so she likes to keep an eye on him.

Milton: Hey Uncle James

James: Hey kiddo, how was school

Milton: Not bad. Reynaldo and I discussed voidcritters for most of lunch

James: Do you want to invite him over after school some day

Milton: Maybe. Hey do you know math as well as volcano stuff

James: Of course. What seems to be the problem

Milton: Times tables. I know the tens but my teacher said I need to start on the fives

James: Don’t worry, we can work on it together, we have time before our dinner guests arrive

Previous ... Next

[dribs-and-drabbles]

Dead Friend Forever ep 3

I told myself I would only watch this in the daytime...it's now 21:10 and I wanted to watch something before bed, and there's not much else to choose from, so let's see if I live to regret this...

Maybe watching this at the end of the day means my head is sluggish because I'm not feeling the need to write any observations...BUT this whole thing with Top and Tan is SO SUS. Did Tan get knocked out when the moped fell over? If so, why doesn't he have a head wound? How could Top disappear with the moped, and how could Tan get back to the house SO quickly? SUS, I tell you.

I have to say, if I were in any kind of situation like this, I would not let the group separate. I would keep everyone all in one room. And wait it out until the scheduled pick up time. Or I would just sleep through it. I would definitely NOT go into the woods, whether with people or alone 😂

So Fluke can be aggressive, purposefully pressing on Por's wound to shut him up...he had seemed more of a scaredy cat compared to the others but maybe he does have a ruthless side too. But good on White for taking the hard drive I guess.

Ooof that is a lot of blood...and this is the point at which I am questioning my choices as I hear noises (normal, perfectly normal noises) in my empty house 🙈 Ok, let's try to continue a bit...

You know what, I'm noping out right now. I'll finish it later 😂

...

Right, I'm trying again over breakfast. 💪🏼

OMG you're in a scary ghost temple...DON'T suggest splitting up!! Have you NOT seen any scary movies?!

😂 Ooops I did it again, I said Phee's line before him. 🤭

DON'T touch the gun, White 🤦🏽‍♀️ But do hide it somewhere where someone who might want to use it won't find it. FFS.

This is another reason why I don't watch scary things - it's so frustrating watching people making really stupid decisions. AHHHHHHhhhhhh.

I was thinking about why I haven't felt the need to comment so much on things this ep, and I think it's because with the first two eps I spent a lot of time questioning what was real and what might be hallucinations, but after Uncle Dang's death (and the seemingly real fight between the masked person and the four in the temple), it seems like we are in Shit Got Real territory right now.

But also, within the Shit Got Real-ness of ep 3, I'm still left wondering who is lying and who is telling the truth. And it doesn't help that there are situations where in a 'normal' bl I'd be asked to stretch my imagination for the story anyway (minor 'plot holes', like you wouldn't really need crutches for a sprained ankle, or you wouldn't necessarily stay overnight in a hospital if you fainted) - is it the same here or are similar instances actually holes in a character's story? As in, they're lying. Take Top and Tan for example - do I just need to believe that Tan and Top falling off the bike meant Tan blacked out long enough for Top to disappear with the bike? Or is it a hole in Tan's story when he goes back to tell the rest of the group? Did he do something to Top? (Or are they in cahoots?) Same with the masked person in the temple. Should I believe that four people couldn't overpower a person with an axe, or is it that the masked person is someone much stronger and skilled at fighting? 🤔

Anyway, the crux of it is is that i still don't trust anyone. Which is a good thing for the mystery.

[demispark]

7. You get the chance to assign five characters new talents! Who do you choose, and what talents would you give them? :3

Thank you for asking! I actually kinda had a feeling you would ask this one :3

I apologize in advance for the lengthy post that follows, I wanted to talk a bit about my choices.

The thing about this one is that I kinda want to give characters the talents they already have, but that I don't think we got to see enough of, if we even saw it at all. Mukuro as the Ultimate Soldier and Rantaro as the Ultimate Adventurer are two prime examples. Mukuro is the Ultimate Not-Junko/Ultimate Corpse and Rantaro is the Ultimate Vaguely Shady Guy.

I'll come up with some real talents though, don't worry! Here's the list:

1. K1-B0: Ultimate Investigator - Get this boy a real talent! He's a robot, and by his own admission, isn't particularly smart, strong, etc. He's sorta like Yasuhiro, with how he is hardly "Ultimate", but compared to others in his field, he's the best. Anyway, I'm not sure if "Investigator" is the right word for it, but ol' Kee-boy has loads of added functions that are incredibly useful for collecting data. Cameras, recording devices, etc. I want to make it clear that this is distinct from being a detective, as this is more broad and less focused on drawing conclusions from data.

2. Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Ultimate Life Coach - I'm not the happiest with it, but just hear me out. So, Taka's talent is (depending on the translation) Ultimate Moral Compass or Ultimate Hall Monitor. So somewhat lame and ill-defined, with the vague implications that this poor honors student is peaking in high school. I want Taka's steadfast dedication to his rigid morals to mean something other than being an annoying stick in the mud (I love Taka a lot but I can't lie that's just how it is). I also really don't want him to be military-related or some kind of political role.

3. Rantaro Amami: Ultimate Stylist - There may be a post lying around somewhere that may have influenced me, but I actually really like this one! Rantaro is kinda pretty, and he does Kaede's nails... I want to expand on that! Probably thanks to having so many sisters, he's great at hair, makeup, nails, the whole 9 yards to have you looking your best!

4. Shuichi Saihara: Ultimate Strategist - Okay, we need to get this poor boy a different job. He is smart, but canonically Team Danganronpa also created him to be the "weakest Ultimate Detective ever". One of the Ultimate Detectives needed to give it up, and sure wasn't gonna be Kyoko. Thus, from the ashes of his Ultimate Detective's wit, the Ultimate Strategist is born. Admittedly, this is more for games like Chess and video games like Fire Emblem, but that's just because I want to put his cleverness and intellect on full display while alleviating some of his insecurities.

5. Chiaki Nanami: Ultimate Brawler - Caught you off guard with that one, didn't I? While I don't hate the ideas I've come up with, they've been a little... safe. Boring. Uninspired, even. I wanted to shake things up with this last one, and Chiaki is the perfect subject! This idea came from two places. The first is a fanfic that I don't remember the name of, but I can find it for ya later if you'd like. There's a scene where Chiaki is in Towa City and is attacked by Monokumas. Drawing from her experiences playing Bayonetta, she pulls off her backpack and starts fucking them up. The second is a clip from DR3: Despair Arc, in which Chiaki performs some kind of Dragon Uppercut move on Teruteru, sending him flying. Being so skilled at fighting that you can pull off fictional moves successfully sounds quite Ultimate, no?

... And that's that! Sorry I got a bit long-winded with this one, I'll try not to ramble too hard if you ask another question. I hope you enjoyed my musings! :3

[dedahblog]

Personal Retrospective on the final chapter mess and the never ending feeling of frustration

I just wanted to write how I found closure with all this mess. Even though it's adressed to IR fans, this post is mosty anti bleach ending coded. It's not an ichiruki meta.

Warning long post

I guess in order to follow my train of thoughts, I'll have to establish first that I'm certain that Kubo was lying about this being his intended ending. My proof is simply comparing both endings Bleach and his previous manga Zombie Powder.

Why is he lying ? Two reasons. First, he's still on contract with his bosses. Second, he's too proud, he would rather have us hate him than take pity for him.

If you're not convinced, I guess you'll waste your time reading my post because it's based on that general idea.

It's so easy to rant about the ending to the point that it becomes ridiculous

"Ichigo and Rukia are important to each other, but not as important as Orhime and Reji are to them ! They are the love of their life !!"

Meanwhile, during the arc that officialized those pairings, Ichigo doesn't consider the abduction of the said love of his life a moment where he felt despair ( not #1 place not #2 place not even in "the bunch of other moments from there to there" place )

and Rukia doesn't recall one single happy memory with the said love of her life whom she had known for +100 years. ( She had only one significant moment with Orhime where the latter expressed her vulnerability to her and by that scene alone, Orihme out-bested that jobber and people are comparing that shit pairing to ichiruki let's see at first if it can out pass rukihhime then we will talk)

"Ichiruki fans are so toxic. The reason Ichigo and Rukia's feeling aren't as explicit as Reji's and Orhime's is because Bleach is not a shojo !! Kubo was also short in time he couldn't solve all those plot holes, let alone romance. Anyway, he doesn't know how to write romance to begin with. It's not like he can sum up the feeling of love and devotion in like two panels"

Meanwhile Kubo :

If you're interested, here is my favorite anti ending meta o n e / t w o

Anyway, what I mean, you can state 1000 problems with this ending, and it's still never enough to the point that I asked myself : what am I really trying to prove ?

Do I have to prove that ending was intentionally bad ?

No. All the Bleach fans who had at least one brain cell either cried, got frustrated or tried to smash their computer/smart phone when reading the last chapter. You don't have to be Einstein to understand that even when a writer was short on time even if he was crawling himself because of his sickness, there are million alternative ways to end a manga than this panel.

If people can't comprehend the malice and the utter disrespect towards fans to end a 15 year running manga with this expression, then they should be go back to elementary school to learn basic comprehension skills

The point is, all the sane bleach fans ( yeah I’m shading myself) left this fandom months afterwards because they felt insulted and alienated by this end and swore to never speak about this manga again. They're a vast majority but they don't want to talk about it on social media. Why ? because why bother ? Even if they complain, what's going to change? Who are they trying to convince ? The only one whose opinion is crucial is Kubo and he showed them by that panel how blatantly he was aware he was writing cr0ap. So what’s the point anyway ?

Do I have to teach the new IR fans that they shouldn't accept this end easily and they have every reason to love ichiruki ?

No, simply because I'm not a preacher. Whether they accept it or not, it won't change my feelings for IR.

Do I have teach the new readers to not let the official end influence their reading experience ?

Well, putting my self in their shoes, it’s hard to fathom that a writer could do scorched earth policy on his life achievement out of pettiness. It's obvious for some of us since we have known him for years, read every one of his controversial statements. However, it will be miracle to convince new readers. Moreover, I can't understand how can people choose to read a 696 chapter manga that has no story resolution ...like...have some ... self-love ? 

(the +10 chapters are Turn Back the Pendulum arc btw)

Do I have to paint myself as the good and wise Ichiruki fan in front of people who "don't like ichiruki because of the shippers" ?

This is the most ridiculous argument to hate a pairing. Just say you don't dare to go against the wave and get out. As far as I'm concerned, the essence of shipping has always been egocentric people self inserting themselves in a fictional character and imposing feelings on them based on one’s mindset and reading comprehension. Whatever is the pairing, shipping fandom will never not be unhinged.

As a matter of fact, when I realized that ichiruki might be one of the aspects that interests to me the most in Bleach, I read some IR vs IH forums and I was disgusted by the offensive language from both sides : people insulting each other over lines on papers was beyond me.

However, I didn't think ill of the pairing itself because no one understands it better than Kubo. So all I did was re-reading their scenes comparing them to other relationships and Kawaichappy was a true blessing. She / he made me love Ichiruki more that I could ever imagine.

I refuse to be a pawn in this viscous circle that Kubo set us to. I think the best solution to cut this chain is not forgiving him or feeling pity for him but to stop holding a grudge against him (even though you have every right to) and just let it go. That's why, I chose to see the good side of things.

1)

When Bleach was getting cancelled, Kubo could have saved his ass by making ichiruki p0rk and throwing an IR baby at us. While the majority of fans won’t be happy with the plot holes like it's the case with the official end, a good portion could derive some satisfaction for this sort of conclusion thanks to Ichigo and Rukia's undeniable chemistry.

Moreover, more than half of merchandise were ichiruki coded at that time and even now btw . But he didn't do that, and for that reason alone, he has my respect and I never spoke ill of him. As far as I'm concerned, if he did make IR p0rk, I won't even send him "death threats", I will fly to Japan, strangle him and honeslty will never speak about IR or bleach ever again.

2)

The second reason why I don’t hold any grudge towards him is thanks to this

You guys can’t even understand how much this page made me happy.

As you know, the "All Stars" double page is drawn at the beginning of every volume and the pictures used above the name of the main characters of every volume are obviously panels featured in the same volume.

However, volume 74 was the exception. Orhime and Rukia's panels are not in this book. Oihime's innocent smile is from volume 73 and Rukia's defiant look from volume 59 (chapter 628) !!!

This can’t not be unintentional.

It basically means that Rukia and Orhime were not featured in this volume. The characters posing as them in volume 74 are imposters.

This is so ridiculously funny. Every time, I read 'xx married xxx', I respond smugly " you sure about that ? based on your precious final canon volume, the last time we saw Rukia is in volume 59 and Orhime in 73."

He's basically saying :" this is Rukia Kuchiki the brave and fierce woman you have always loved, don't let that cheap representation fools you. "

And " This is Orhime Inoue the innocent girl you knew all along, who is selfishly ignoring she is basically in a battlefield, beaming from happiness like a child because she is yearning from all her heart to feel loved and validated. Don't let that cheap representation fools you"

Honestly, Kubo didn't need to do that. The fact that he still cared about my favorite character Rukia to the point of explicitly dissociating her along with Orhime from this mess still makes me so happy to this day.

I love Ichiruki but I like Orhime more than Ichigo. So Kubo not bothering with Ichigo doesn't annoy me one bit. It's rather hilarious

3)

The third and final reason is the final volume cover, I made a meta about it years ago

IR fam, some of you may think you got the shortest end of the stick with this ending. But, believe me you have the greatest advantage of all. :

you don't have to associate yourself with anything about that ending.

You don't have to associate yourself with this :

The execution place that represents Soul Society corruption and rotten system became more menacing than it ever was

but you will always be linked to Ichigo being the hero who will" pass even through 100 billion blades" to save Rukia unshamedly defying million years of corruption.

You don't have to associate yourself with a pairing where the girl has known the guy for 100 years and he has never made her happy one micro second for all those years.

And you certainly don't have to associate yourself with a pairing that got canon in the same page as this abomination was written

and whose child is undoubtedly getting molested by his aunt probably explains why he's a creep btw

People doesn't even realize how insulting it is for Bleach that Yuzu, out of all the characters, was represented this way in the final conclusion

In the first chapter, Ichigo was hesitant to let Rukia stab him with her sword. He was scared shitless even though his family were literaly half dead and Rukia was injured because of him ... yep your hero ladies and gentlemen. It was Yuzu's bravery, selflessness and love for her brother that made him accept this life changing decision.

When the guy didn't have the courage to be the main character and to start off the manga in the first place but it was his little sisters' bravery that inspired him to take the first step then it was Rukia's ethics in the second chapter that shaped his idea of how an ideal hero should be.

Don't you love it when Bleach was supporting women supremacy ?

... Good old days indeed.

The second reason why you shouldn't feel petty about your otp not being canon in this fake ending is you know who should be frustated ? Kubo. 

He may act tough, shitposting himself and pulling cr*p from there to there but you can't convince me that seeing his manga torn and burned, getting insults from everywhere (even though he deserves it) didn't have any effect on him.

Obviously, we felt alienated reading the last chapter but imagine the guy who created those characters that had been living in his mind for 15 years, imagine feeling alienated by what you had created.

I remember reading somewhere that during Fade to Black writting process, he sat in a corner, was frustrated with himself because he couldn't figure out what kind of name Rukia would think is suitable for those siblings. He was determined to dive into Rukia's character and find out what kind of name SHE would like. He cared so much about staying true to her character.

Sure he was frustrated, angry at everyone. Sure he wanted to burn everything down before getting cancelled. But you can't convince me that the love he once had for his life achievement vanished completly

You can't convince me that he didn't hope that things were concluded in better circumstances.

In a way, you may feel sad for IR not having a decent closure. But bear in mind, no one is more petty than Kubo and his constant self sabotage since 2016 is the proof.

Final conclusion, ichiruki is one of the best fictional pairing ever written and it deserved the best and obviously not to be linked to that ending.

We have always been fans of the love, whether platonic or romantic, that Rukia and Ichigo have for each other. The love they shared together that made them have the desire to love themselves and the courage to hope.

I guess the best tribute for this kind of relationship is to express our love for them how much they meant to us and not to succumb to negativity

Because negativity is only reserved to the man who doomed his life achievement.

[eissibee]

God I knew this would happen

Got made redundant just before Christmas, after months of being given nothing to do by the company, despite begging and training and trying to make myself useful. Now I'm useless. It was my grad role opportunity and in 2 years I still don't feel like I know enough to even get the same role elsewhere. I tried to spend idle time learning but it wasn't enough. THEN my prodigal brother returns from a top London job to get several offers and a higher paying job within weeks of returning to the country. My company wouldn't even let me tell people I was leaving.

So it's back to this. Him back to 'help' me by pointing out my every flaw but the added bonus of saying my opinions are naughty bc I might be autistic and therefore don't know what is "usual". Him back to a great job and great friends who he goes camping with for new years before moving out into a flat with them.

And I'm still living at home. Almost no friends. No job. No direction, no motivation. One cat dead before Christmas and the other waiting for an appointment to go because she's got a growth under her tongue, and it's NOT FAIR because we JUST lost Mouse and she is happy and healthy as ever but we still have to kill her at some point but have no idea when is right. And I've got no support from the Great Modern Human Focused company I was booted from, one job lead that might go cold bc it's a family friend connection and that's not ethically sound, and my CV is an embarrassing mess just like I am. I had this stupid idea to make it fun and I KNEW. this would all hit as soon as Christmas was over.

I knew the pit would be waiting so I thought I could jump over rather than in, but I'm too weak for that. I leapt right in, right to the damn bottom, because I AM useless and weak. I'm "weird" and struggle with basic tasks, I claim to be an artist but never make art. I have all the time and opportunity in the world to make something or upskill or add to a UX portfolio I don't have, and I'm just. Lying in bed, making the pillow damp and hoping my parents don't try to get me to eat dinner cos idk if I can. It is pathetic.

My brother and dad and coworkers are right about me. I know nothing, my opinions have no value, I lack awareness and probably have a shit fucked work ethic anyway after months of nothing to do.

I miss Mouse. I need her. I told her that when she was diagnosed but it didn't matter. I was sobbing so hard next to her and she just put a paw on my leg. I begged her not to go and by the end she was so anemic and cold and thin I had to make that call myself. My parents were needing comfort and I was alone. I'm dreading having to face it all over again with Missie. I think hell is just hearing your mother sob in another room.

I know no one who knows me irl will see this. It's probably for the best. I feel like a useless jobless skill less unlovable nobody who will probably never find happiness or someone to care for me after my parents are gone. I'll never make that stupid picture book, or have a career, or dreams. It's just this, and then fog. Nothing I can see. What's the point?

See ya, 2022.

[fierceawakening]

The other thing that’s weird is, like… (yes, I have stopped looking at that blog. I should not have in the first place but occasionally autismblr and cluster b blr intersect so since a lot of my friends are on the autism spectrum occasionally this is on my dash, and I took the bait and went down the rabbit hole yesterday, against my better judgment but I felt I had to make sure there’s nothing new that might change my mind)

Like. I’ve begun to suspect that part of the reason my mom and aunt are a bit messed up is that my grandma had some narcissistic traits. She was very image obsessed and shamed my mom for not being beautiful and lavished praise on my aunt for being the cute one. (I never saw it. Aunt constantly has a “something smells bad in here” expression and all I could ever see when I looked at her was Mr. Yuck.) (And yes, she did the same thing to me. But I'm trans. I wasn't profoundly affected by her desire for me to be a beautiful girl because that wasn't me in the first place.)

So I’m thinking both my mom and my aunt have some narcissistic traits too, and that this is part of why they’re both bizarrely mean on fairly frequent occasions. (Neither are mean all day every day. But I’d personally advise anyone considering befriending either of them to look out for flying insults.)

But if this is true, then it’s likely that if any of its hereditary, I also have some similar traits. I share DNA with these people, and they raised me, which means both that I'm like them biologically AND that they're the people who taught me how to act.

And... I suspect this is true!

I actually do have a very strong desire to win people’s respect and admiration. I read posts like “it’s okay to just exist and do nothing” and can’t figure out how anyone could tolerate that.

But I don’t think I have the pathology. Because I try very hard to recognize that if I want to be special, so do most people. If I achieve it and AM special, that implies so have many other people. Therefore, it makes no sense to think I’m superior, even if I sometimes would feel better if I were. That’s not how value works, and if I try to make it work that way when it doesn't, not only will I hurt a lot of people I don’t want to hurt and feel awful about doing it, but I’ll fail at the whole project anyway.

So never mind.

And if I WANT to feel superior, there are things I can do to do that without harming others. If I play competitive games, then when I win it’s not a delusion or even a belief, it’s measurable. Someone won and it was me.

Even more importantly, the other player consented knowing they might lose. I didn’t win by harming them. I won by taking the risk of losing myself, which is fair. Added bonus if I do win it’s verifiable. I don’t have to wonder if anyone agrees.

And if I lose? I don’t like it, but it happens all the time. All it means is I need to increase my skill or focus, which are goals I can achieve. (And sometimes it means HOLY HELL OPPONENT YOU ARE SMART AND I RESPECT THAT, even though I wanted to win too.)

So yeah. When people say “you have to let me believe I’m God so I stop hurting,” I’m not looking askance because that’s weird.

I’m looking askance because that’s not the only way to stop hurting and that means they’re lying.

[aita-blorbos]

WIBTA if I decided to leave my siblings?

I'd ask you to read the full post before deciding, but the crux of the matter really lies in the title.

I (17m) have a lot of siblings, but right now I'm specifically talking about the three I was raised with. (in age order: A is 17m, K is 15m, and D is 13m. Relevant also are G, 18F, and her/our mom, E, 50s?F. E has more of our siblings but they're not relevant here.)

A, K, D, and I were all raised by our dad (762M). He wasn't even supposed to /be/ our dad -- we were given to him by our biological (kind of, we're all test tube babies) father as repayment for something he'd stolen. He was /supposed/ to give back the thing or some money or something but, nope, toddlers. Our dad kept us as his anyway and he really did do his best. He was a famously dangerous type but he spent who knows how much money on dealing with A's scandals without ever saying anything about it, he stopped wearing leather because D wanted to sit by him but the sound bothered him, he taught all of us the skills of the trade, he fully funded all of our hobbies, whatever. Hell, when I finally told him I'd been going farther from home than I was supposed to and met some of our other siblings, he was upset, sure, but he gave me permission to leave the city and invited them to come by pretty much whenever they wanted. The associates who knew him before we showed up claim that we made him soft, and I believe it.

Doesn't mean he was a perfect dad, we got in a huge fight about some of my issues with him the last time we talked, but none of it was ever /that/ serious. I would take the fight back if I could.

So with that context, he died recently. None of us were expecting it, it was very sudden and violent, but my siblings (the ones I met last year) and I accidentally got involved in this whole mess of stuff regarding our bio dad's world domination plans or whatever and dad just.... died. For us, which makes it extra rough.

According to K, I apparently just shut down so bad G had to pick me up and carry me out and I then I cried so hard I threw up. I really don't remember, so he could be lying, but E immediately put on the whole stern mom voice about how it wasn't kind to make fun of me for that, so. K and A are also trying really hard to insist that he's still alive, but they didn't see him die, /I/ did, and G agreed there's no chance he's still alive but they won't believe me on it.

We've been living at E's place ever since.

And I don't know, I just don't feel like I can do anything else here. D got freaked out by something and nearly took out G's eye and she handled it so well that he's been following her around like a puppy since. (Not exaggerating. E and I still haven't been able to get the blood out of the carpet). Meanwhile A made ONE comment about me not having loved our father enough or something and I got so nasty with him that we're not on speaking terms right now.

I don't know what exactly it would help if I left, but it's not as if they would be ALONE. A has hit it off really well with one of our siblings and they've declared themselves bonded brothers and spend all of their time together. D is pretty much ignoring everyone else in favour of G and she's endlessly patient with him, so he'll do fine. K found out E still knows all our genetic codes by memory (from helping to create us) and has been pestering her about it, plus he's started some kind of friendly engineering competition with another one of our siblings. It's just me that's not settling in, and having more of us makes us more difficult to hide. E kept her kids entirely away from our creator until last year and he still doesn't know how to find them when he wants to, but she has a lot less resources than our dad had.

[vole-mon-amour]

7x24, part 2.

Every time there's a chase & Derek starts chasing the suspect, I'm glad he's in good physical shape & a fast runner. Qualities that are definitely needed here.

Aaron saving Derek's life, hell yeah.

The way Emily saved Will... Yeah, that job at Interpol makes A LOT of sense for her. The girl is smart and her brain works FAST even under severe pressure.

Breaking news: local girl cries about some hets. For real though, that got to me. And if it were Dave & Aaron, I'd be absolutely wailing. The writing, the acting. What a beautiful ending to a season.

A paradox: I dislike kids. When my fav character is good with kids, I'm screaming and awww'ing about it. That's probably because, in my eyes, it's hard to tend for the kids, hard to talk to them, hard to calm them down. And when characters are genuinely good with creatures like kids, someone both so pure and hard to deal with, it gets to me. And I tend to love those fictional kids that grow on me. Dealing with them IRL is a nightmare & I would never.

Anyway, as I already said, Dave is so good with kids. He's such a good soul. And as I'm thinking about it, I try not to idolize him 'cause I'm sure there are some issues of his own & dealing him irl would be different. Still. I love the man.

Of COURSE Dave phones Aaron the first thing. Of course. <3 They're so fucking domestic with each other, so cosy, so homey, I am losing it with them. They make me smile so much.

They're matching, hello??? And Derek understands her. I wish I was looking as good as Penelope, though. WIth that body & those clothes. Ahhh.

Mentally crying over Aaron being the professional that he is & noticing all those little things about people's body language. It's silly, I know, but my love for him & his personality & his skills is just as big as for Dave. They absolutely do have my heart.

I love you, host with the most. And your enormously huge house and the back yard, wow. I'd love to just wander around there. Maybe sit by the pool.

Spencer is very cute, so is Henry.

I am never shutting up about these husbands after this.

What a GOOD freaking ending. So different compared to the previous one where I cried my eyes out. I never want one of those again. A happy one is way better. I'm glad I still have 7-9 seasons with them (maybe less, depends on how it goes after Aaron leaving but still. Love this family.)

Garcia and Hotch, helloooo??? I'm so in love with this show & these characters & this ending. Can't stop smiling.

And the song at the end: "When he walked into my life and I let him dive, 'cause the way that he looked at me made me feel alive." Beautiful, just beautiful.

Spencer blowing a kiss to Derek? And it was DEFINITELY directed at him. Ok. :')

For a moment I seriously thought Dave and Aaron are going to dance together. I mean, "That's enough for you, I'm dancing with him now." The way Aaron takes her hand off Dave's shoulder. I would be lying if I say that my heart did not skip a beat, wow. How good they look together, oh my.

They have more chemistry than Hotch with his 'girlfriend', lol. Beth seems perfectly ok as a person, but in no way I am shipping that. Either way, husbands with their beloved daughter. I really like the sight of this, they look good together.

I kind of can't believe I actually made it this far and finished the season, since I slowed down very much for the past month or two. I am very excited to start season 8. I hope I make it all the way to the end of the show.