#ao3??? ayo? what?

[liliallowed]

welp... I've officially gone insane.

thanks AO3.

thanks fanfic writers I cannot get this noodle out of my head now

@undertale-writing-times

[strigital]

just... him... 🥺

[super-nova5045]

(I don't have that emoji lol 💔) + angry

“Okay, you have to promise not to get angry, because it’s just a theory – I notice patterns and shit a lot – in fact, it’s just a hypothesis. So take it with a grain of salt. But since Eddie and I were briefly in band together, I’ve met the members of Hellfire Club on more than one occasion, and I already knew Mike because of Starcourt. And I just wanted to say – he felt different, too.”

[mrsbarnesblog]

wakanda

masterlist ko-fi ao3

Summary: Bucky's trigger words are being removed and you finally talk about your feelings.

Word count: 5.2k

Warnings: +18 ‼️ smut, trigger words, feelings, oral sex, unprotected sex, size kink, dirty talk, love confessions.

Author's note: read part 1 for the better experience💘

After that night, you woke up with Bucky holding you tightly to his chest, and it was really one of the best feelings—waking up in the warmth of his body wrapped around you. Your muscles were sore; you wanted to nuzzle into him and stay like that forever, but unfortunately, Fury called you not so long after because apparently you were the only one who was able to do the mission. 

You two didn’t have enough time to talk about whatever happened between you. You were able to say just a few words to each other, with another agent hurrying you up from the quinjet. And after almost the whole month passed by without any contact, you finally got a call from Shuri, who told you that in a couple of days Ayo was going to officially remove trigger words from Bucky, and if everything goes well, he would get a new arm and would be a free man. 

Sitting in a quinjet a few miles away from Wakanda, you felt nervous as hell. You didn’t know what Bucky felt toward you. Were your feelings mutual? He did say that he thought about you, but was it just sex for him? Or maybe he regretted everything and wanted to be your friend again. 

Honestly, you wouldn’t be able to handle that. After that night, after you finished your mission and were again alone in your room, the aching feeling in your chest made you want to cry. You wanted Bucky with every piece of your body, and living for a month with a million questions and scenarios was too tough. And now, thinking about the coming ceremony, you could barely stop yourself from going down the rabbit hole. 

When you finally landed, one of the Dora Milages met you to guide you to the place of the ceremony. It was in the woods, far away from the city and anyone’s eyes. At first, you saw Ayo, who only nodded to you with a small smile. 

But then your eyes fell on him. 

Bucky was already looking at you, and you didn’t quite understand how he felt about your presence. He was sitting near the fire in his usual Wakandian clothes and with a cute, messy bun—the same that you saw on him when everything between you went downhill. The fire in front of him danced across his face, making him look stunning. Though you could see that he was scared and nervous about what was coming. Those deep lines in between his eyebrows, the slightly unfocused and distant look in the eyes, and the nervous clenching of his fist. It took everything in you not to run closer and hug him to say that he was strong and everything was going to be okay.

Bucky couldn’t believe that you were really there. You came to Wakanda for him, to support him in such an important moment, even though you didn’t have to. You looked gorgeous as always, and the soft smile on your face calmed his overthinking mind. Mumbling a quiet “hey” under your breath, you saw the soft smile blossoming on Bucky’s face and his lips slightly moving as he said it back to you. He was nervous as hell, he couldn’t fight the feeling that there was no chance for him to heal and that the piece of the Winter Soldier was forever immortalized in his brain.  But you believed in him, so had had to be strong for you. 

“Are you ready, James?” Ayo interrupted your silent conversation with each other and came close to Bucky. 

“Are you sure about this?” Bucky looked at the fire, now feeling unsure because of this whole situation again. 

“I won’t let you hurt anyone.” Bucky’s worried eyes slipped back to you for a second, as if the thought of you being there when everything might go wrong scared him the most. He just slightly nodded back to Ayo and took a deep breath.

Honestly, you had never heard or even read Bucky’s trigger words because they created a weird, disgusting feeling in your stomach, so when Ayo started to say them, it sent goosebumps down your spine.

Желание.

Your blood froze in your veins by the way Bucky’s face expression changed. His eyes were glued to one spot, and any piece of that soft and warm look that he had for you disappeared.

Ржавый.

Семнадцать.

“This is not gonna work.” His body started to tremble, overwhelmed with the emotions and memories of his past. 

Рассвет. 

Печь.

Девять.

Bucky’s eyes filled with tears, and he gripped his clothes in his right hand to control his body. You silently cried with him, praying to whoever was up there to let this man be free. You knew that he was strong and that he could fight against people who messed up his head, and seeing that he was not giving up made you feel so proud inside.

Добросердечный. 

Возвращение на родину. 

Один.

Грузовой вагон.

“You are free.” You deeply inhaled, only then realizing that you had held your breath. Bucky completely broke down with Ayo’s words, lowering his head and unable to hold burning tears.

Ayo looked at you, and that was everything you needed to rush closer to Bucky. You fell to your knees right on the ground in front of him, wrapping your hands around his shoulders and bringing his head to your neck. He sank into you, crying harder and gripping the back of your shirt with his hand. 

“I’m so proud of you. I’m so, so proud of you, James. You did amazing. You are so strong, baby.” Your soothing voice filled his ears while you held him close to you with one hand and rubbed his back with another. 

“‘M sorry.” The hot breath touched your neck when Bucky started to mumble and apologize with a shaky voice. 

You pushed him back by his shoulders and immediately put your hands on his face when you saw the panic on his face. “No. No, Bucky. There’s nothing to be sorry for, okay? I’m here for you. You did such a good job, and I’m so proud that you fought back and got rid of these stupid words. You can live a normal life now, and I’ll be there for you as long as you want me to.” Your fingers wiped the tears, not missing how Bucky leaned into your touch.

“Thank you for coming here. It means everything to me. I’m serious, Y/N. There’s no one in the world I needed to see during this moment besides you. I missed you so much.” He was clearly unsure whether he should say it or not, but you gave him another soft smile, feeling how the tension left his body a little bit.

“I missed you too, Buck.” Your faces moved closer, eyes glued to each other's lips. “I’m sorry that I left in such a hurry. I didn’t want to.” You almost whispered, unable to stop thinking about kissing him. Bucky had almost given in when his body moved closer to yours as a magnet, but this little intimate moment was interrupted by the voice of Wakanda’s princess. 

“Sorry to disturb your peace, but me and my brother have a little present here. And I’m not a fan of looking at other people making out, by the way.” Your face got hot when you looked back and saw Shuri, T'Challa, and Dora Milaje all staring at you. 

Bucky quickly stood up, helping you get up from your knees and then leaning lower to dust off your knees. He looked back at you with a frown on his cute face, as if only then he realized that you had been standing on the ground this whole time. You only grabbed his right hand and bit your lip, trying to hold back your growing smile. 

You led Bucky closer to everyone, and when two women brought a large vibranium box and put it in front of Bucky, you freed his only arm, putting your left hand on his lower back in a supportive gesture.

“Congratulations, White Wolf.” T’Challa nodded his head, and one of Dora Milaje’s stepped in front of the case and opened it, revealing Bucky’s new arm. 

It was truly beautiful. Smooth, dark vibranium arm with golden pieces. 

“It’s completely my design. This arm is much better than the last one; it’s stronger, it has some cool options, and you can take it off whenever you want to. But what is more important is that I worked hard and found a way to connect it to the nerves so you can feel everything. Not as good as the real one, of course, but still.” Shuri said with her hard accent, obviously being really proud of her own masterpiece. You couldn't hold back the tears, overwhelmed with the fact that she made it for Bucky and didn't ask for anything in return. 

“I can feel?” Bucky’s voice almost broke, and you came closer, pressing your body against his back. “Thank you. Thank you so much, Shuri. And you too, T’Challa. I can't express how grateful I am that you allowed me to stay in Wakanda and are now giving me this.” 

“It’s an honor, Sergeant Barnes. So do you want to try it on?” 

Dora Milaje easily lifted what looked like a really heavy arm; Bucky rolled up his clothes, and, with a quick motion, it was connected with his shoulder. He stayed silent for a few seconds as if he were getting used to the feeling, but then he rotated it 360 degrees, and you heard the soft swirling of the plates. 

He looked down at his new hand, clenching and unclenching his fist, moving each finger, and you stared at this in awe. 

“Can I... hurt someone with it unintentionally?” His eyes quickly shot to you before looking back at Shuri. A knowing smile appeared on her face, and she exchanged looks with her brother. 

“No. Speaking in simple terms, it’s connected to your nervous system and brain. Like your right arm, the brain just sends electrical impulses there. If you have no intention of doing something, it won’t happen. I promise this.”  

“Well, I think we can finish it here. You both can be guests here as long as you want to; our country is always open for you. Have a great night.” T’Challa lowered his head, and you mumbled a little ‘thank you’, and after that, you and Bucky were left alone near the fire. 

You felt the tension between you two as you both stayed silent. Bucky looked too lost in his head, unsure what to do or say to. How was he supposed to acted around the woman he had an amazing sex with and who he had crush on for way too long. It shouldn’t have been that awkward. You were best friends, and even if you both had secret feelings for each other, nothing changed. 

“Can you show me?” You stretched your right hand, waiting for Bucky to feel confident enough to allow you to touch his new vibranium arm. He looked at you curiously, with a hint of fear and insecurity. “It’s just me, Buck, remember?” 

He deeply inhaled before putting his left hand in yours; his eyes were staring at your face, closely looking at your reaction. 

Your hands wrapped around his vibranium wrist, holding it gently and getting used to the feel of the smooth metal. Your right hand went higher to trace golden plates with your fingers, absolutely stunned by their beauty.

 “I– I can feel your touch.” Bucky got a lump in his throat because of your gentle movements and how softly you treated him, even though he didn’t deserve it. It wasn’t exactly how he felt with the right hand, but it was something. The thought of finally being able to hold you and hug you sent a warm feeling through his stomach.

“You deserve it, James. I’m so happy for you.” One of your hands flew back to Bucky’s face, and you bit your lip when the feeling of the moment that you two shared earlier washed over you again.

Bucky once again leaned into your touch, showing how much trust he had for you, while his eyes never left your beautiful face, lit by the warm light of fire. He stepped closer, finally realizing how much he needed to feel you again. Since that day, almost a month ago, he has thought about you non-stop. Even if the rational part of his brain told him that you just couldn’t call or visit him whenever you wanted, he still convinced himself that it meant nothing to you. That it was a mistake, because how could you possibly want him, out of all people?

But now you've come back. You came here again to visit him on such an important day. You stood by him, touching his metal hand without fear, and staring at him in that strange way that made Bucky weak in the knees. 

He didn’t know what to do or how to talk about that night in his hut, but when he nervously licked his lip and your eyes immediately shot there, Bucky couldn’t think straight anymore.

Before you could even process what was going on, Bucky’s hands were on each side of your face, dragging you higher and closer. His slightly chapped lips attacked yours, moving quickly and almost desperately. You were taken aback, but you didn’t mind, kissing him with no less passion. Your tongues were connected, dancing around each other, making you both moan and trying to get your bodies as close as possible. 

It was overwhelming—too hot to handle, actually. If you thought that you just missed Bucky before that, then during the kiss, your mind and your body screamed for him to take you right on the spot. You needed him closer—on top of you, inside of you. 

You suddenly moaned into the kiss, remembering how fucking good it felt to be so full of him. Bucky freed your face, instead finally gripping your waist and hips and pressing you closer to his hard chest. 

“Bucky– James, please, I want you so bad.” You whined, clinging onto his shoulders. He pulled his face away, licking his lips to get more of your taste, and when you locked your eyes again, your body tensed, and you unconsciously started to squeeze around nothing.

You both already looked so messy, with red cheeks and hot skin. Bucky stayed silent for a moment, still getting used to being able to hold you with both arms.

“Are you sure, doll? I don’t want you to regre–” 

“No, no, Bucky. I won’t regret it. The last time was the best fucking night of my life. I wish I could stay, but you know that they didn’t allow me. I missed you, and I thought about it so much that it’s embarrassing to admit.” You quickly interrupted him. Bucky’s hands tightened around you at your confession, and he nodded more to himself.

“C’mon, my hut is not far away.”

***

It was really not far away, but still, while Bucky was leading you by your hand, you almost fell. You were just so mesmerized by his strong back that you completely forgot to look under your feet in the almost complete darkness. Bucky’s reflexes helped you stay on your feet, and mumbling something like “It’s faster that way, anyway,” he casually lifted you off the ground, making you wrap around him like a koala around the tree. His right arm was under your ass, and the metal one was protectively lying on your waist. 

It was so effortless for him, as if your weight were nothing, and it made you even more wet and excited than the kiss. 

In just a few minutes, Bucky got to his hut, turning on the small light and closing the door. He put you back on the floor but he didn’t let you go far away. 

“You can’t imagine how much I want you, Y/N. I dreamed about you even before our first time. You are so beautiful, so gorgeous, fuck.” He dragged you closer, connecting your foreheads. Your chest felt tight after his words, and you gently rubbed his bearded cheek.

“I want you the same way. Since the day we became friends. I wish you could see yourself the way I do—that you deserve all the best things in the world, that you are not a burden for any of us, and especially not for me. ” You mumbled, not breaking eye contact.

Bucky shook his head in disbelief, but then leaned closer and connected your lips. It was much softer, without a rush. You both were just enjoying the feeling, happy to be in each other's arms again. You grabbed his clothes, not ending your kiss, and started to go back until you felt the pile of soft blankets on the floor. You then lowered both of your bodies and laid back, so Bucky was now on top of you.

He stopped kissing you and pulled away to look at you. 

It was and felt much different than your first time. He was on top of you, holding himself with his left arm near your head. Even if Bucky knew that you truly didn’t care about it, the fact that he was now capable of pleasing you and treating you the way you deserved made him feel a little bit better about himself. 

Bucky’s eyes slowly checked your whole body, from your pretty eyes and plump, swollen lips all the way down to the soft skin of your legs. He couldn’t help himself and put his large and warm hand on your left thigh, then traced your legs and belly as if it were his first time. You were shivering under his eyes and touch, but you still didn’t move and let him do what he needed too. 

You understood how hard it was for Bucky to be almost without control the last time you were together. He needed to feel in charge after everything he had gone through, and you didn’t mind letting him do whatever he wanted with you.

“Let me take care of you, doll. Please.” He almost whispered, looking back at your face.

“Do you remember what I told you the last time? You can have me, Bucky.” You put your hands around his body, feeling tensed muscles under his clothes.

I promise that when you get your new arm, I’ll let you fuck me however you want to, okay? 

Bucky growled when he remembered the exact words you told him. 

He caught your lips in a kiss again, rubbing your thigh with his hand and then getting it higher until it rested on your breast, covered in a bra. His mouth moved lower, slightly pinching and biting the tender skin of your neck and collarbones. At the same time, he dragged the cups of your bra lower, finally getting to your boobs. Two fingers took your sensetive nipple in them, slightly pressing on it and making your body tremble. Your fingers slid up from his shoulders until you were able to bury them in the soft brown locks.

“So sensitive, hm?” His hot breath on your chest made you unconsciously nod in agreement, and you could swear that you felt how Bucky’s lips curled up in a smirk. “I need to take it off.” 

Suddenly, he was not lying on top of you anymore but sitting in between your legs with both hands on your thighs. He looked flushed and had that kind of shine in his eyes that you had never seen before.

Bucky’s hands moved higher, pulling up the shirt over your head and throwing it somewhere on the floor. Then he looked at your bra but didn’t do anything.

“You can take it off, Buck. If you remember how to do it, old man.”

The tension in Bucky’s body immediately vanished after your joke, and his brows flew to his hair. 

“Well, then you fuck with an old man, sweetheart. And I do remember how to do it.” He proved his point by sliding his hand behind your back and, with one swift motion, unclipping it. “Shit, I almost forgot how good they looked.” 

His hands hesitated for a few seconds, and when you saw that slightly distant look in his eyes creeping back, you decided to slightly push him. 

“Give me your hands, Bucky. Both of them.” He looked at you unsurely but still obeyed your request.

“I’m not sure—”

You completely ignored his words, instead taking both wrists into your hands and placing Bucky’s hands on your boobs. The feeling of cold metal made you hiss, but it felt good against your flushed and sensitive skin.

“Do you remember what Shuri said? You won’t hurt me until it’s your intention. And you don’t want to do it, do you?” You playfully arched an eyebrow, already knowing the answer.

“No, God— no, doll. I would never, I swear.”

“Then I want you to properly touch me with both of your hands and finally take off your damn clothes.”

“You’re hot when you're being bossy.” Following your instructions, he finally gave in and started to play with your hard nipples with his thumbs. His head lowered back to your chest, and then his hot mouth was sucking and gently licking your nipple while the metal hand took care of the other one.

It felt amazing and addictive. You couldn’t control your moans and the way your hips tried to rub onto something, but only met with Bucky’s lower stomach. You were desperate to get more, without feeling shame grinding on his torso, and finally, when Bucky was satisfied with giving attention to your boobs, he went lower, kissing your belly down to your shorts.

“Need to taste you, doll. Please let me do it.” You just nodded, and it was everything Bucky needed to quickly drag your shorts and panties down your legs and lay flat on his stomach, trowing your legs over his shoulders. 

Your mouth slightly opened at this picture. You would’ve never thought that Bucky Barnes, your best friend and deadliest assassin, would be in between your legs, asking to taste you.

He didn’t hesitate, instantly diving in and licking a long stripe across your folds. You both moaned. Your head fell back, and Bucky gripped your thighs only tighter to hold you close. He was obviously enjoying it himself. You felt it in the way he circled his tongue around your clit, then went lower and put it in you to get every drop of your juice; by the way he was slightly moving your hips, as if he just wanted you to ride his face; and by the way he moaned into your soaking core when your hand slipped into his long hair and gripped them.

Your orgasm came quick and unexpected, washing all over you and making you desperately moan and squeeze your thighs around Bucky’s head. He licked you softly and gently, helping you to go through it but still wanting to taste your sweet cream.

“S’ pretty, baby. Can spend here all fucking day, I swear.” His face and beard looked soaking wet, but he didn’t seem to mind when the self-satisfied grin appeared on his lips. 

You thought that you liked him that way. You felt good that you were able to bring it out of him, even for some time. Bucky looked different, as he forgot about everything else in the world and even about things that happened just an hour ago. He looked younger and happier, and you bit your lip to not smile like an idiot.

Bucky moved higher up your body, kissing you again. You moaned into his mouth as soon as you tasted yourself on his lips, while your hands started wandering around his body and trying to feel more bare skin. Finally, you unfastened his belt and were able to take off his red shuka, revealing pretty and tanned skin that you hadn't had a chance to see fully the last time. 

He moved away, watching your face while your soft hands touched his skin. You were so delicate, tracing with your fingers from his abs to his left shoulder. Bucky’s body shivered when you finally reached the rough, bumpy skin covered in scars. Besides the Wakandian doctors, you were the first person he allowed to see that, and the fact that your face didn’t show any sign of disgust or fear almost brought Bucky to tears.

“You're really beautiful, Bucky; you know that?” Even in the dark light of the room, you could see the pink dust covering his cheeks. “C’mere, I want you.” You dragged him back on top of you, kissing his soft lips. Bucky finally got rid of his clothes with a free hand, and when you felt the weight of his hard cock on the lower part of your belly, you instantly moaned into the kiss. 

Bucky’s flesh hand gripped your thighs, lining his own perfectly that way, so his cock was sliding back and forth on your wet core. You wanted to continue kissing him, but it was hard to concentrate when his tip bumped into your still-sensitive clit every single time. 

“B-bucky…” 

“Fuck, I missed your moans. Baby—so wet for me, huh? Can just easily slip in…” There were only a few inches between your faces, and your lips were touching with each word, but your head was so light and fuzzy with the stimulation that the only thing that you were able to think of was his dick inside of you.

“Please, Bucky, please, I need you inside.” Your legs wrapped around Bucky’s waist, pulling him closer, and your hands were tightly holding his shoulders.

Bucky bumped his nose into yours in an affectionate way, and the next thing you felt was the way he slowly entered you. 

Your eyes rolled back with the loud gasp escaping your mouth. Bucky growled in your neck, settling in and stretching you out so deliciously. His hand probably left fingerprints on your delicate skin, but he just couldn’t control himself with the way your wet pussy was so welcoming and warm around him. 

“My good girl. Fuck, I won’t let you leave again; you’re mine now, baby.” Bucky quickly pulled himself together, standing on his knees in between your legs, and finally started moving. 

He didn’t hesitate when both of his hands held you tightly in place, so you wouldn’t move with every thrust of his hips. He set the perfect steady rhythm, pushing his cock all the way in and then drugging it out so only the tip would stay inside.

You were just a moaning and whining mess, trying to find anything to hold onto. Bucky was standing over you, and as much as you wanted to enjoy his pretty face and perfect body, your eyes were hazy, and you couldn’t really concentrate on anything. 

“That’s right, baby. Feel so good ‘round my cock, takin’ me so well, fuck!” A quick look at the place where the two of you connected almost made Bucky instantly cum. You looked much smaller than him; your pussy gripped his cock so hard, and he was basically drenched in your wetness.

Bucky stretched his right arm to squeeze your nipple, and the change in the angle of his body made the base of his cock touch your clit with every thrust. You couldn’t control the volume of your moans when you dug your nails into Bucky’s arm, and your legs started shaking from the coming orgasm. 

“Bucky, ah—don’t stop, I’m gonna cum! Please!” 

“Cum with me, babydoll, just let it go.” He didn’t stop. He fucked you even harder and faster, moaning your name out loud. You both were in your little bubble, touching each other, scratching and moaning, trying to reach your highs.

It didn’t take you long to fall over the edge. You whined, arching your back from the floor, as your vision became white with a loud noise in your ears. The way you were spasming around him brought Bucky to his final, and not being able to hold himself anymore, he filled you up with his semen, collapsing on top of your body.

You both were quiet for some time—maybe minutes or even hours. Your mind was floating somewhere because the heavy and warm body on top of you made you feel incredibly safe and comfy. Only when Bucky slightly moved away and brushed sweaty baby hairs from your forehead did you open your eyes.

He was flushed and sweaty too, but he had the biggest smile you’ve seen on his face.

Bucky couldn’t help but stare at your pretty face with dreamy eyes. You were so perfect—literally the best human being in the world—and right now you were with him. You accepted everything he had done; you showered him with your attention and your kindness, even before this happened and when you were best friends.

He wondered who you were for him now.

After that, he couldn’t be your friend anymore. Not when he saw you naked, kissed you, or heard you moaning his name. Even if Bucky tried to silence the voice in his head and lock away his heart, it was impossible to do it now. Lost in his head, his mouth finally worked on it’s own, saying things that were created by his stupid brain. 

“I love you.” 

Bucky froze in your hands, as if he had surprised even himself with those words, but you didn’t let him pull away and become distant again. You grabbed his face and couldn’t hold back your bright smile.

“I love you too, Buck. I’ve been in love with you for so long.” Bucky couldn’t believe his ears and stared at you in pure disbelief.

“I was head over heels for you but I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to ruin everything between us.” Your foreheads touched as you both closed your eyes to enjoy each other's presence.

“Well, me too. I guess we’re both just stupid.” You chuckled. 

“Yeah, definitely.” Bucky smiled back at you before he closed an inch between your faces and kissed you again. Sweetly and softly, this time showing you all of the emotions that he kept for you.

“So what’s next? What do you want to do? You are free now.” Bucky fell near you on the floor, pulled you closer to his chest, and deeply inhaled.

“I don’t know... I like to be here, but I want to go back to New York, to Brooklyn, and I want to be with you.” 

“Then stay in the compound. Stay with us. Stay with me. We can spend a few more days in Wakanda and then go back to New York. I bet that Steve and even Sam miss you.” Your fingers traced the lines on his stomach, and you looked up to see Bucky's reaction to your words.

“Okay, doll. Let’s do it. I'll be happy to do whatever you want to, as long as you're with me.” Bucky kissed the top of your head, tightening his hands around your back, and you nuzzled deeper into his body, finally being happy and calm.

Tags: @scorpiosaintt @livingoffsavvyillusion

[ayoarticulate]

yall i cant feel my legs… all these ayo and jeremy pics… oh we’re so in there

i better have a million and one stories on ao3 tmr where they win the james beard award or what the fuck ever with this pics as inspo

[inmyicyworld]

Wakanda pt. 2

pt. 1

Summary: Bucky's trigger words are being removed and you finally talk about your feelings.

Word count: 5k.

Warnings: Bucky's trigger words, smut and fluff, a pinch of angst, unprotected sex, oral sex (f receiving), nipple play, size kink?, dirty talk, pet names.

Author's note: so it's the second part of this work. Also, I did some research this time about Bucky's clothes that he was wearing in BP. I read some things about African culture, and I believe that his red piece of clothing is called a shuka. Please correct me if I'm wrong!

Btw, my inbox is open, so y'all can share your ideas or whatever🤍

*English is not my first language, sorry if you find any mistakes*

I posted it again because the first time it didn’t show up in any tags

masterlist my ao3 ko-fi

After that night, you woke up with Bucky holding you tightly to his chest, and it was really one of the best mornings you even had. But unfortunately, Fury called you not so long after because apparently you were the only one who was able to do that mission. 

You two didn’t have enough time to talk about whatever happened between you, and after almost the whole month passed by without any contact, you finally got a call from Shuri, who told you that in a couple of days Ayo is going to officially remove trigger words from Bucky, and if everything goes well, he’ll get a new arm and will be a free man. 

Sitting in a quinjet a few miles away from Wakanda, you felt nervous as hell. You didn’t know what Bucky felt toward you. Were your feelings mutual? Was it just sex for him? Or maybe he regretted everything and wanted to be your friend again. 

Honestly, you wouldn’t be able to handle that. After that night, after you finished your mission and were again alone in your room, the aching feeling in your chest made you want to cry. You wanted Bucky with every piece of your body, and living for a month with a million questions and scenarios was too tough. 

When you finally landed, one of the Dora Milages met you to guide you to the place of the ceremony. It was in the woods, far away from the city and anyone’s eyes. At first, you saw Ayo, who only nodded to you with a small smile. 

But then your eyes fell on him. 

Bucky was already looking at you, and you didn’t quite understand how he felt about your presence. He was sitting near the fire in his usual Wakandian clothes and with a cute messy bun. The fire in front of him danced on his face, and he looked so beautiful but scared and nervous at the same time. It took everything in you not to run closer and hug him. 

Bucky couldn’t believe that you were really there. You came to Wakanda for him, to support him in such an important moment, even though you didn’t have to. You looked gorgeous as always, and the soft smile on your face calmed his overthinking mind. Mumbling a quiet “hey” under your breath, you saw the soft smile blossoming on Bucky’s face and his lips slightly moving as he said it back to you

“Are you ready, James?” Ayo interrupted your silent conversation with each other and came close to Bucky. 

“Are you sure about this?” Bucky looked at the fire, now feeling scared because of this whole situation again. He couldn’t fight the feeling that there was no chance for him to heal and that the piece of the Winter Soldier was forever immortalized in his brain. 

“I won’t let you hurt anyone.” Bucky’s worried eyes slipped back to you for a second, as if the thought of you being there when everything might go wrong scared him the most. He just slightly nodded back to Ayo and took a deep breath.

Honestly, you had never heard or even read Bucky’s trigger words because they created a weird, disgusting feeling in your stomach, so when Ayo started to say them, it sent goosebumps down your spine.

Желание.

Your blood froze in your veins by the way Bucky’s face expression changed. His eyes were glued to one spot, and any piece of that soft and warm look that he had for you disappeared.

Ржавый.

Семнадцать.

“This is not gonna work.” His body started to tremble, overwhelmed with the emotions and memories of his past. 

Рассвет. 

Печь.

Девять.

Bucky’s eyes filled with tears, and he gripped his clothes in his right hand to control his body. You silently cried with him, praying to whoever was up there to let this man be free. You knew that he was strong and that he could fight against people who messed up his head, and seeing that he was not giving up made you feel so warm and proud inside.

Добросердечный. 

Возвращение на родину. 

Один.

Грузовой вагон.

“You are free.” You deeply inhaled, only then realizing that you had held your breath. Bucky completely broke down with Ayo’s words, looking to the ground with tears running down his face.

Ayo looked at you, and that was everything you needed to rush closer to Bucky. You fell to your knees right on the ground in front of him, wrapping your hands around his shoulders and bringing his head to your neck. He sank into you, crying harder and gripping the back of your shirt with his hand. 

“I’m so proud of you. I’m so, so proud of you, James. You did amazing.” Your soothing voice filled his ears while you held him close to you with one hand and rubbed his back with another. 

“‘M sorry.” The hot breath touched your neck when Bucky started to mumble and apologize with a shaky voice. 

You pushed him back by his shoulders and immediately put your hands on his face when you saw the panic on his face. “No. No, Bucky. There’s nothing to be sorry for, okay? I’m here for you. You are so strong, and I’m so proud that you fought back and got rid of these stupid words. You can live a normal life now, and I’ll be there for you as long as you want me to.” Your fingers wiped the tears, not missing how Bucky leaned into your touch.

“Thank you for coming here. It means everything to me. I missed you so much.” He was clearly unsure whether he should say it or not, but you gave him another soft smile, feeling how the tension left his body a little bit.

“I missed you too, Buck.” Your faces moved closer, eyes glued to each other's lips. Bucky almost kissed you, but this little intimate moment was interrupted by the voice of Wakanda’s princess. 

“Sorry to disturb your peace, but me and my brother have a little present here. And I’m not a fan of looking at other people making out, by the way.” Your face got hot when you looked back and saw Shuri, T'Challa, and Dora Milaje all staring at you. 

Bucky quickly stood up, helping you get up from your knees and then leaning lower to dust off your knees. He looked back at you with a frown on his cute face, as if only then he realized that you had been standing on the ground this whole time. You only grabbed his right hand and bit your lip, trying to hold on to your growing smile. 

You led Bucky closer to everyone, and when two women brought a large vibranium box, put it in front of Bucky, you freed his only arm, putting your left hand on his lower back in a supportive gesture.

“Congratulations, White Wolf.” T’Challa nodded his head, and one of Dora Milaje’s stepped in front of the case and opened it, revealing Bucky’s new arm. 

It was truly beautiful. Slik dark vibranium arm with golden pieces. 

“It’s completely my design. This arm is much better than the last one; it’s stronger, it has some cool options, and you can take it off whenever you want to. But what is more important is that I worked hard and found a way to connect it to the nerves so you can feel everything. Not as good as the real one, of course, but still.” Shuri said with her hard accent, obviously being really proud of her own masterpiece. You couldn't hold back the tears, overwhelmed with the fact that she made it for Bucky and didn't ask for anything in return. 

“I can feel?” Bucky’s voice almost broke, and you came closer, pressing your body against his back. “Thank you. Thank you so much, Shuri. And you too, T’Challa. I can't express how grateful I am that you allowed me to stay in Wakanda and are now giving me this.” 

“It’s an honor, Sergeant Barnes. So do you want to try it on?” 

Dora Milaje easily lifted what looked like a really heavy arm; Bucky rolled up his clothes, and, with a quick motion, it was connected with his shoulder. He stayed silent for a few seconds as if he were getting used to the feeling, but then he rotated it 360 degrees, and you heard the soft swirling of the plates. 

He looked down at his new hand, clenching and unclenching his fist, moving each finger, and you stared at this in awe. 

“Can I... hurt someone with it unintentionally?” His eyes quickly shot to you before looking back at Shuri. A smirk appeared on her face, and she exchanged knowing looks with her brother. 

“No. Speaking in simple terms, it’s connected to your brain. Like your right arm, the brain just sends electrical impulses there. If you have no intention of doing something, it won’t happen. I promise this.”  

“Well, I think we can finish it here. You both can be guests here as long as you want to; our country is always open for you. Have a great night.” T’Challa lowered his head, and you mumbled a little ‘thank you’, and after that, you and Bucky were left alone near the fire. 

You felt the tension between you two as you both stayed silent. But what were you doing, for fuck’s sake? It shouldn’t be awkward. You were best friends, and even if you had feelings for him, nothing changed. 

“Can you show me?” You stretched your right hand, waiting for Bucky to feel confident enough to allow you to touch his new vibranium arm. He looked at you curiously, with a hint of fear and insecurity. “It’s just me, Buck, remember?” 

He deeply inhaled before putting his left hand in yours; his eyes were staring at your face, closely looking at your reaction. 

Your hands wrapped around his vibranium wrist, holding it gently and getting used to the feel of the smooth metal. Your right hand went higher to trace golden plates with your fingers, absolutely stunned by their beauty.

 “I– I can feel your touch.” Bucky got a lump in his throat because of your gentle movements and how softly you treated him, even though he didn’t deserve it. It wasn’t exactly how he felt with the right hand, but it was something. The thought of finally being able to hold you and hug you sent a warm feeling through his stomach.

“You deserve it, James. I’m so happy for you.” One of your hands flew back to Bucky’s face, and you bit your lip when the feeling of the moment that you two shared before you were disturbed came back to you.

Bucky once again leaned into your touch, showing how much trust he had for you, while his eyes never left your beautiful, lit by the warm light of fire, face. He stepped closer, finally realizing how much he needed to feel you again. Since that day, almost a month ago, he has thought about you non-stop. Even if the rational part of his brain told him that you just couldn’t call or visit him whenever you wanted, he still convinced himself that it meant nothing to you. That it was a mistake, because how could you possibly want him, out of all people?

But now you've come back. You came here again to visit him on such an important day. You supported him, you touched his metal hand without fear, and you were staring at him in that weird way that made Bucky weak in the knees. 

He didn’t know what to do or how to talk about that night in his hut, but when he nervously licked his lip and your eyes immediately shot there, Bucky couldn’t think straight anymore.

Before you could even process what was going on, Bucky’s hands were on each side of your face, dragging you higher and closer. His slightly chapped lips attacked yours, moving quickly and almost desperately. You were taken aback, but you didn’t mind, kissing him with no less passion. Your tongues were connected, dancing around each other, making you both moan and trying to get your bodies as close as possible. 

It was overwhelming—too hot to handle, actually. If you thought that you just missed Bucky, then during the kiss, your mind and your body screamed for him to take you right on the spot. You needed him closer—on top of you, inside of you. 

You suddenly moaned into the kiss, remembering how fucking good it felt to be so full of him. Bucky freed your face, instead finnally gripping your waist and hips, pressing you closer to his hard chest. 

“Bucky– James, please, I want you so bad.” You whined, clinging onto his shoulders. He pulled his face away, licking his lips to get more of your taste, and when you locked your eyes again, your body tensed, and you unconsciously started to squeeze around nothing.

You both already looked so messy, with red cheeks and hot skin. Bucky stayed silent for a moment, still getting used to being able to hold you with both arms.

“Are you sure, doll? I don’t want you to regre–” 

“No, no, Bucky. I won’t regret it. The last time was the best fucking night of my life. I wish I could stay, but you know that they didn’t allow me. I missed you, and I thought about it so much that it’s embarrassing to admit.” You blurred out. Bucky’s hands tightened around you at your confession, and he nodded more to himself.

“C’mon, my hut is not far away.”

It was really not far away, but still, while Bucky was leading you by your hand, you almost fell. You were just so mesmerized by his strong back that you completely forgot to look under your feet in the almost complete darkness. Bucky’s reflections helped you stay on your feet, and mumbling something like “It’s faster that way, anyway,” he casually lifted you off the ground, making you wrap around him like a koala around the tree. His right arm was under your ass, and the metal one was protectively lying on your waist. 

It was so effortless for him, as if your weight was nothing, and it made you even more wet and excited than the kiss. 

In just a few minutes, Bucky got to his hut, turning on the small light and closing the door. He dropped you down but didn’t let you go far away. 

“You can’t imagine how much I want you, Y/N. Even before our first time. You are so beautiful, so gorgeous, fuck.” He dragged you closer, connecting your foreheads. Your chest felt tight after his words, and you gently rubbed his bearded cheek.

“I want you the same way. Since the day we became friends. I wish you could see yourself the way I do.” You mumbled, not breaking eye contact.

Bucky shook his head, but then leaned closer and connected your lips. It was much softer, without a rush. You both were just enjoying the feeling, happy to be in each other's arms again. You grabbed his clothes, not ending your kiss, and started to go back until you felt the pile of soft blankets on the floor. You then lowered both of your bodies and laid back, so Bucky was now on top of you.

He stopped kissing you and pulled away to look at you. 

It was and felt much different than your first time. He was on top of you, holding himself with his left arm near your head. Even if Bucky knew that you truly didn’t care about it, the fact that he was now capable of pleasing you and treating you the way you deserved made him feel a little bit better about himself. 

Bucky’s eyes slowly checked your whole body, from your pretty eyes and plump, swollen lips down to the soft skin of your legs. He couldn’t help himself and put his large and warm hand on your left thigh, then traced your whole body as if it were his first time. You were shivering under his eyes and touch, but you still didn’t move and let him do what he needed too. 

You understood how hard it was for Bucky to be almost without control the last time you were together. He needed to feel in charge after everything he had gone through, and you didn’t mind letting him do whatever he wanted with you.

“Let me take care of you, doll. Please.” He almost whispered, looking back at your face.

“Do you remember what I told you the last time? You can have me, Bucky.” You put your hands around his body, feeling tensed muscles under his clothes.

I promise that when you get your new arm, I’ll let you fuck me however you want to, okay? 

Bucky growled when he remembered the exact words you told him. 

He caught your lips in a kiss again, rubbing your thigh with his hand and then getting it higher until it rested on your breast, covered in a bra. His mouth moved lower, slightly pinching and biting the tender skin of your neck and collarbones. At the same time, he dragged the cups of your bra lower, finally getting to your boobs. Two fingers took your sensetive nipple in them, slightly pressing on it and making your body shake. Your fingers slid up on his body until you were able to bury them in the soft brown locks.

“So sensitive, hm?” His hot breath on your chest made you unconsciously nod in agreement, and you could swear that you felt how Bucky’s lips curled up in a smirk. “I need to take it off.” 

Suddenly, he was not lying on top of you anymore but sitting in between your legs with both hands on your thighs. He looked flushed and had that kind of shine in his eyes that you had never seen before.

Bucky’s hands moved higher, pulling up the shirt over your head and throwing it somewhere on the floor. Then he looked at your bra, but didn’t do anything.

“You can take it off, Buck. If you remember how to do it, old man.”

The tension in Bucky’s body immediately vanished after your joke, and his brows flew to his hair. 

“Well, then you fuck with an old man, sweetheart. And I do remember how to do it.” He proved his point by sliding his hand behind your back and, with one swift motion, unclipping your bra. “Shit, I almost forgot how good they looked.” 

His hands hesitated for a few seconds, and when you saw that slightly distant look in his eyes creeping back, you decided to slightly push him. 

“Give me your hands, Bucky. Both of them.” He looked at you unsurely but still obeyed your request.

“I’m not sure—”

You completely ignored his words, instead taking both wrists into your hands and placing Bucky’s hands on your boobs. The feeling of cold metal made you hiss, but it felt good against your flushed and sensitive skin.

“Do you remember what Shuri said? You won’t hurt me until it’s your intention. And you don’t want to do it, do you?” You playfully arched an eyebrow, already knowing the answer.

“No, God, no, doll. I would never, I swear.”

“Then I want you to properly touch me with both of your hands and finally take off your damn clothes.”

“You’re hot when you're being bossy.” Following your instructions, he finally gave in and started to play with your hard nipples with his thumbs. His head lowered back to your chest, and then his hot mouth was sucking and gently licking your nipple while the metal hand took care of the other one.

It felt amazing and addictive. You couldn’t control your moans and the way your hips tried to rub onto something, but only met with Bucky’s lower stomach. You were desperate to get more without feeling shame grinding on his torso, and finally, when Bucky was satisfied with giving attention to your boobs, he went lower, kissing your belly down to your shorts.

“Need to taste you, doll. Please let me do it.” You just nodded, and it was everything Bucky needed to quickly drag your shorts and panties down your legs and lay flat on his stomach, trowing your legs over his shoulders. 

Your mouth slightly opened at this picture. You would’ve never thought that Bucky Barnes, your best friend and deadliest assassin, would be in between your legs, asking to taste you.

He didn’t hesitate, instantly diving in and licking a long stripe across your folds. You both moaned. Your head fell back, and Bucky gripped your thighs only tighter to hold you close. He was obviously enjoying it himself. You felt it in the way he circled his tongue around your clit, then went lower and put it in you to get every drop of your juice; by the way he was slightly moving your hips, as if he just wanted you to ride his face; and by the way he moaned into your soaking core when your hand slipped into his long hair and gripped them.

Your orgasm came quick and unexpected, washing all over you and making you desperately moan and squeeze your thighs around Bucky’s head. He licked you softly and gently, helping you to go through it but still wanting to taste your sweet cream.

“S’ pretty, baby. Can spend here all fucking day, I swear.” His face and beard looked soaking wet, but he didn’t seem to mind when the self-satisfied grin appeared on his lips. 

You thought that you liked him that way. You felt good that you were able to bring it out of him, even for some time. Bucky looked different, as he forgot about everything else in the world and even about things that happened just an hour ago. He looked younger and happier, and you bit your lip to not smile like an idiot.

Bucky moved higher up your body, kissing you again. You moaned into his mouth as soon as you tasted yourself on his lips, while your hands started wandering around his body and trying to feel more bare skin. Finally, you unfastened his belt and were able to take off his red shuka, revealing pretty and tanned skin that you hadn't had a chance to see fully the last time. 

He moved away, watching your face while your soft hands touched his skin. You were so delicate, tracing with your fingers from his abs to his left shoulder. Bucky’s body shivered when you finally reached the rough, bumpy skin covered in scars. Besides the Wakandian doctors, you were the first person he allowed to see that, and the fact that your face didn’t show any sign of disgust or fear almost brought Bucky to tears.

“You're really beautiful, Bucky; you know that?” Even in the dark light of the room, you could see the pink flush covering his cheeks. “C’mere, I want you.” You dragged him back on top of you, kissing his soft lips. Bucky finally got rid of his clothes with a free hand, and when you felt the weight of his hard cock on the lower part of your belly, you instantly moaned into the kiss. 

Bucky’s flesh hand gripped your thighs, lining his own perfectly that way, so his cock was sliding back and forth on your wet core. You wanted to continue kissing him, but it was hard to concentrate when his tip bumped into your still-sensitive clit every single time. 

“B-bucky…” 

“Fuck, I missed your moans. Baby—so wet for me, huh? Can just easily slip in…” There were only a few inches between your faces, and your lips were touching with each word, but your head was so light and fuzzy with the stimulation that the only thing that you were able to think of was his dick inside of you.

“Please, Bucky, please, I need you inside.” Your legs wrapped around Bucky’s waist, pulling him closer, and your hands were tightly holding his shoulders.

Bucky bumped his nose into yours in an affectionate way, and the next thing you felt was the way he slowly entered you. 

Your eyes rolled back with the loud gasp escaping your mouth. Bucky growled in your neck, settling in and stretching you out so deliciously. His hand probably left fingerprints on your delicate skin, but he just couldn’t control himself with the way your wet pussy was so welcoming and warm around him. 

“My good girl. Fuck, I won’t let you leave again; you’re mine now, baby.” Bucky quickly pulled himself together, standing on his knees in between your legs, and finally started moving. 

He didn’t hesitate when both of his hands held you tightly in place, so you wouldn’t move with every thrust of Bucky’s hips. He set the perfect steady rhythm, pushing his cock all the way in and then drugging it out so only the tip would stay inside.

You were just a moaning and whining mess, trying to find anything to hold onto. Bucky was standing over you, and as much as you wanted to enjoy his pretty face and perfect body, your eyes were hazy, and you couldn’t really concentrate on anything. 

“That’s right, baby. Feel so good ‘round my cock, takin’ me so well, fuck!” A quick look at the place where the two of you connected almost made Bucky instantly cum. You looked much smaller than him; your pussy gripped his cock so hard, and he was basically drenched in your wetness.

Bucky stretched his right arm to squeeze your nipple, and the change in the angle of his body made the base of his cock touch your clit with every thrust. You couldn’t control the volume of your moans when you dug your nails into Bucky’s arm, and your legs started shaking from the coming orgasm. 

“Bucky, ah—don’t stop, I’m gonna cum! Please!” 

“Cum with me, babydoll, just let it go.” He didn’t stop. He fucked you even harder and faster, moaning your name out loud. You both were in your little bubble, touching each other, scratching and moaning, trying to reach your highs.

It didn’t take you long to fall over the edge. You whined, arching your back from the floor, as your vision became white with a loud noise in your ears. The way you were spasming around him brought Bucky to his final, and not being able to hold himself anymore, he filled you up with his semen, collapsing on top of your body.

You both were quiet for some time—maybe minutes or even hours. Your mind was floating somewhere because the heavy and warm body on top of you made you feel incredibly safe and comfy. Only when Bucky slightly moved away and brushed sweaty baby hairs from your forehead did you open your eyes.

He was flushed and sweaty too, but he had the biggest smile you’ve seen on his face.

Bucky couldn’t help but stare at your pretty face with dreamy eyes. You were so perfect—literally the best human being in the world—and right now you were with him. You accepted everything he had done; you showered him with your attention and your kindness, even before this happened and when you were best friends.

He wondered who you were for him now.

After that, he couldn’t be your friend anymore. Not when he saw you naked, kissed you, or heard you moaning his name. Even if before Bucky tried to silence the voice in his head and lock away his heart, it was impossible to do now. Lost in his head, his mouth finally worked on it’s own, saying things that were created by his stupid brain. 

“I love you.” 

Bucky froze in your hands, as if he had surprised even himself with those words, but you didn’t let him pull away and become distant again. You grabbed his face and couldn’t hold back your bright smile.

“I love you too, Buck. I’ve been in love with you for so long.” Bucky couldn’t believe his ears and stared at you in pure disbelief.

“I—but I didn’t say anything before because I didn’t want to ruin everything between us.” Your foreheads touched as you both closed your eyes to enjoy each other's presence.

“Well, me too. I guess we’re both just stupid.” You chuckled. 

“Yeah, definitely.” Bucky smiled back at you before he closed an inch between your faces and kissed you again. Sweetly and softly, this time showing you all of the emotions that he kept for you.

“So what’s next? What do you want to do? You are free now.” Bucky fell near you on the floor, pulled you closer to his chest, and deeply inhaled.

“I don’t know... I like to be here, but I want to go back to New York, to Brooklyn, and I want to be with you.” 

“Then stay in the compound. Stay with us. Stay with me. We can spend a few more days in Wakanda and then go back to New York. I bet that Steve and even Sam miss you.” Your fingers traced the lines on his stomach, and you looked up to see Bucky's reaction to your words.

“Okay, doll. Let’s do it. I'll be happy to do whatever you want to, as long as you're with me.” Bucky kissed the top of your head, tightening his hand around your back, and you nuzzled deeper into his body, finally being happy and calm.

[choccy-milky]

I’ve already left a comment on AO3 but MY GOD CHOCCY it is rare that I shed REAL ACTUAL TEARS at a fic but here I am sniffling at my work desk trying to pretend I’m not thinking about how precious Seb and Clora’s love is 🥺😭💜

Honestly fantastic work, I hope you keep writing after this story is completed because I will read whatever you write at this point 💜

AWW BAHAHA i am both sorry and happy that the chap made u sniffle at ur desk at work🥺💖AND ILL DEFS KEEP WRITING!! im so happy ppl like my story and clora and seb and my writing in general😭💖THANK U💖💖

AYO WHAT??? HUH!!!!!!?!!!!!! I WOULD BE HONOURED???? ANON IF YOU DO THIS (OR SORRY, I MEAN IF YOUR *FRIEND* DOES THIS) YOU BETTER SHOW PICS!!! U ARE LEGALLY OBLIGATED!!!! now im just curious what drawing ur considering👀👀

live footage of me rn

ME TOO I HAVE SUCH OLDER SEB AND CLORA BRAINROT RN, i actually have another short comic of them in the works based off of a oneshot someone is writing of older seb/clora that ive read the WIP of and i 100000% consider it canon and IM SO EXCITED FOR IT😭😭😭LOL i dont really have any headcanons tho, i need to give older seb/clora some thought 🤔feel free to send some tbh🤔🤔 (ALSO THANK YOU💖💖) in the meantime heres some wip panels from the current oneshot comic to tie u over on older seb/clora content. LOVE ME SOME ANGRY OVERPROTECTIVE SEB

[magicalblgirl]

Ayo, so I see people are interested with the TianShan fic I was looking for. Anyway, I got some insanely good recommendations for all of you. There's some amazing story telling and plot going on here so bear with me...

I LOVE THIS FIC TO BITS! 🤧 I would coddle it if it was my child. He Tian is a brat but Momo would not budge, he's just as determined and won't back down. A glorified babysitter to an overgrown man child (please I love the jabs here 😝). Momo just wants to do his job but He Tian's stubborness is getting in the way *cough cough*. Also, there's violence, guns and knives. Read HERE

THIS, I love this so much 😭. Somewhat dark and violent in the beginning. Come on, He Tian beat Momo up in place of Jian Yi. But Momo is strong in his own right and it left He Tian puzzled. Momo and Jian Yi are like bffs here. He Tian and Zhang Zhen Xi are friends/mafia bros. Read HERE

This is friggin PAINFUL. Like angsty, violent, heart-wrenching, punch in the gut painful. BUT it is also one of the most AMAZING fics I've read. 🤕⚠️ LIKE YOU JUST WANT THEM TO BE TOGETHER BUT WTF. Mo got trust issues, He Tian got a truck load of em. It's bloody and kinda graphic especially what happened to Momo (nothing too gory tho imo, okay but some parts are kskskskdjd but for me they are bearable) so reader discretion, check the tags. Read HERE

This is ongoing so I am thankful for the author for updating it on New Year's eve 🎆. A friggin emotional roller coaster. I love to suffer, kick me in th b4lls with the angst but I also like the moments of vulnerability. Like for the emotionally constipated people like me, this fic is GOLD. And yeah.. SMüT (almost in every chapter 😏). Read HERE

Anyways...

Look at the update date. Look at me. Did I tell y'all it's UNFINISHED fics?? Cuz if I suffer, you suffer with me 😝 Also, I've read almost all TianShan fics in AO3 except those less than 1500 words lol. I prefer longer fics 5-10k and above, if there's a 100k completed fic I will errect a statue in your honor.

Anyways, if you read it, show the author some love or leave a kudos.

[hexalianrebel-blackfeathers]

Twinning

Panda’s Notes: Started this one in August last year. Could be wishful thinking, but I hope the boys get along when it's all over. Hope you guys like it. >w<

[Ao3] || [Commissions] || [Ko-fi]

Miles Morales was down in the garage hidden below his uncle’s apartment. He nodded along to the beat coming through his headphones, humming the tune as he dismantled a motorcycle that he’d swiped after a fight with some cartel goons. If he took it apart fast enough, he wouldn’t have to tell his uncle how he’d gotten it back to base. He’d drained the gas and oil already, and he’d trashed most of the outer casings—If he wanted decorative junk, he could hit the body shop whenever—now, he was ripping the engine apart, switching between the wrenches and screwdrivers laid out beside him by just the feel of the handles.

He might have ignored his phone buzzing the first time. If it didn’t ring, it wasn’t his mom, and it wasn’t a worry. When it buzzed a fourth time within 20 minutes, he realized something was probably happening. He sucked his teeth as he wiped his hands down; the bike wasn’t exactly ripped up enough to say he’d gotten it from the scrapyard, but it would have to do if someone was looking for him. He tossed the towel aside and picked up his phone, tapping in his code and glancing the newest notifications—What the hell…?

Aaron: [Ayo, come get your cousin] Aaron: [He gettin on my last nerve] Me: [my wat]

His uncle didn’t respond. At least, he didn’t respond fast enough for the new rush of confusion that was filling Miles’ head. He grabbed his jacket and took the stairs two at a time. He was joking; he had to be. Right? Seriously… But, even then, who the hell would it be dropping in without giving Aaron time to…warn… him…?

Hm…

When he got up to the apartment, he might have slipped into Prowler mode without meaning to. Time slowed to a crawl, and all of the world became that one instant as he took in every altered piece of the room he could: There were two pizza boxes and a box of soda cans on the table beside the window. He didn’t recognize the brands on either of them. The punching bag was hoisted higher off the floor than he remembered, and the record player was spinning another old R&B track.

“Tio?” He called, slowly stepping forward. “Uncle Aaron!”

“Yeah, man?” His gaze whipped to the couch, and Aaron was just…there. He sat on the couch, using a game controller to beckon Miles closer as he sipped from a cup. “You good?”

Miles pouted, and his uncle smirked slightly; Aaron knew it would take nothing short of a bomb going off to pull him away from whatever thing he was tinkering with if he was in the garage. It wouldn’t be the first time a metaphorical one was used, but he hadn’t thought Aaron would lie to him like this.

“M’fine.” Miles insisted with a huff, reaching to close the door. “The hell was that text though? Just because I’m busy doesn’t mean you have t—”

The second the door clicked shut, Miles thought he heard a step behind him. Before he could spin around, he was bear-hugged from behind and lifted up. His legs flailed as he shouted, and he tried to swing his head back against whoever held him.

“Happy to see you too, tough guy.” Miles recognized that voice, and all the panic transformed into that funny emotion smack between relief and incomparable rage.

Of course it was him.

He heaved a sigh before muttering several strings of Spanish curses under his breath, and Aaron laughed a bit as he looked back at them.

-----------------

“So, this is my cousin now?” Miles—um, Earth-42 Miles? Uh, 42? Sure—42 asked in a huff once all three of them were on the couch with pizza on paper plates and colored cups filled with ice and soda.

Miles—1610 Miles. Yes, it was his turn with his own name—smirked around a bite of pizza and reached behind their uncle’s head to push him lightly. “Picking up a lot of attitude toward the guy who brought you free lunch.”

42 slapped his hand away, hiding the little grin on his face with his cup. “Nobody invited your sneaky ass to crawl all over our ceiling.”

“Uh, my ceiling? Thank you.” Aaron interjected, reaching back to smack both of their arms from behind his head. “And you left your little communicator up here when you went down to work. I told him he could drop in.”

“Ugggh, why?” 42 put on the most exaggerated tone, unable to resist the grin that took over his face as Aaron and Miles gave him almost matching looks. “You know I can’t stand him.”

Aaron just shrugged, and Miles put on that offended look. “He had pizza. And you needed to get out of that garage. I know you skipped breakfast this morning.”

42 was about to argue when Miles butt in. “Oho, you skipped breakfast?! I know Mami was pissed.”

“Best believe. She texted me probably the second he left.” Aaron gently elbowed 42’s side. “She knew you were coming over; you don’t got anywhere better to be? No cute little dates with that Ganke boy?”

Miles nearly choked as 42 tried to shout over both of them. “You’re dating Ganke?!”

“Ey, ey, ey! We—ugh! We haven’t put labels on it yet, alright?!” He insisted, blushing madly. “What’s it to you anyway, you ain’t met him!”

“Dude, I have a Ganke; he’s my roommate at school. My best friend.”

“Ew, you live in one of those shoebox rooms? Could not be me.”

“Deflecting!” Miles pointed aggressively and laughed around some comments in broken Spanish while 42 sipped smugly and looked away.

“What about you though? You kissed your boy yet?” Aaron asked without looking at either of them.

42 coughed hard as Miles balked. “Aaron!!” It was almost eerie how their voices were exactly the same sometimes. Aaron just snickered, tossing his game controller casually onto the table.

“Ya’ll do a lot of bickering for supposedly being the same person.” He chuckled, crossing his arms.

42 rolled his eyes, wiping the side of his mouth. “Please. I’m still not convinced it’s not some kind of bullshit half the time. As if I’m anything like this goody-two-shoes dork.”

Miles snorted, crossing his arms. “Is that really all you got, eh? Disney channel lookin’ ass.”

“You wanna fuckin’ go, cuz?” 42 pulled his legs up onto the couch, attempting to lunge at Miles when Aaron caught him around the waist. He flailed for a moment, and Miles sneered. “Ay, let me go; the punk has it coming anyw—Wait, wait, don’t you dare!”

Aaron had shifted one hand, letting his fingers crawl gently on the back of 42’s ribs just below his shoulder blades. And Miles’ face lit up in shock as his doppelganger fell into near-hysterical laughter.

“No way, seriously?!” He snorted, and Aaron gave a slight smirk as he tried to keep his flailing nephew from squirming away from him.

“Oh, you’re surprised?” He chuckled, scribbling up between 42’s shoulders and pulling him close before he could flail his shrieky self onto the floor. “His mom always called it—”

“Angel Wings!” Miles said at the same time as Aaron, laughing softly as his eyes lit up at the memory. “Man, I can’t believe it; that never worked on me.”

42 glared at both of them as he was more or less dropped back onto the couch cushion, and Miles couldn’t tell if it was just anger or a sort of envy. “Bullshit. You have to be fuckin’ lying.”

“Pfft, well—” Miles stammered a bit, looking away in slight embarrassment. “Not half as bad as it gets you, clearly—Hey!” He dodged to one side as an unopened soda can launched past his head, barely managing to snag it with his web shooter before it hit something.  

“’Ey, chill.” Aaron said lightly, sneaking another tickle on 42’s back as he wrapped his arm around him. “Wildin’ out all the time… Staying in that garage all day is not helping you relax.”

“I don’t need to relax!” 42 barked out suddenly, only to cringe and cross his arms as he pouted. He took a few deep breaths, sighing when Aaron pat him on the head.

“Somethin’ you need to talk about?”

42 glanced between the two of them, and Miles leaned slightly to see his face. He let out a final sigh and shook his head. “Just stressed…” He admitted with a shrug. “Tired, maybe?”

Aaron hummed, nodding as he squeezed 42’s shoulder.

Miles let out a sigh of his own, setting down his cup before resting his chin on one hand. “Think we should call Ganke to cuddle with you?” He asked gently, letting the smirk grow on his face at the incredulous look 42 gave him.

“Nah, yeah, that’s three strikes.” Aaron chuckled, shrugging when Miles balked. “You can kill him.”

42 sneered, and Miles flailed slightly, about to run off when Aaron sneakily grabbed his ankle. His escape was disrupted just enough that 42 was able to tackle him off of the couch. They wrestled for a moment, with Miles quickly gaining the upper hand with his Spider strength…right up until 42 shoved his hands under Miles’ arms. Miles shrieked, pulling his arms in tight and kicking against the floor as he cackled. 42 balked for a second, his eyes and smile brightening.

“No fuckin’ way; you were actually right, you little shit.” He laughed, pressing his thumbs into Miles’ ribs.

“I-I’m taller than you!” Miles managed out between his laughter.

“You—!”

Aaron chuckled as Miles squealed, and he grabbed his game controller again while they fought. It wasn’t much of a fight for long—one of them did have super-strength, after all—but it was nice that his nephews were finally having fun.

[hotcheetohatredwastaken]

Ayo random question for my mutuals and also other LU people, when I post my Prologue Chapters for my fic Blood Drops on Roses, do ya'll think I should post the entirety of the story here on tumblr? Or do the few paragraphs and then read the rest on AO3 bit? I just... I don't know how to do anything when it comes to this, any insight ya'll could give when it comes to preference is great.

[chrysalizzm]

vine boom. wasteland character expression memes

read the series here.

(more on the characters and also quality details under the cut)

so wasteland, the series currently being updated on ao3, focuses pretty much entirely on the dsmp cast, but behind the scenes the cast of this thing is sprawling, including but not limited to empires, hermitcraft, the life series, mcc participants, smpearth, noxcrew, older guard mcyts like jordan n mitch n jerome n seto n deadlox, speedrunners, tiredtwt, outsiders smp, fable smp, redacted smp, and my personal scrungklies, which are team salad, a korean mcyt group that brings me great joy. this is why there r characters on this expression meme chart that u probably do not recognize if u are a) under the age of 18 b) exclusively know dream smp or c) are not a korean speaker. some fun facts abt the wasteland characters, their powers, or the circumstances in which these expressions take place:

ivory was a sidekick for hermit that was chased into villainy following her coming out as trans. as throne, she is now one of jordan's lieutenants in trinity and has assassinated several government officials.

jimmy, alias firebird, is an empire offices hero. he also happens to be allied with the fates under the alias wildfire. i'm sure this is of no import in the story /lie

i cannot imagine in what circumstance punz would ever make that expression. mans is chill as fuck.

i accidentally anime boyed the hell out of fruit, alias floodbloom under chase co. he has a lot of admirers on tumblr and about two thirst accounts on twitter

shelby's (alias wilder) hero uniform is heavily inspired by princess mononoke. she's signed on under empire offices, like jimmy, and can release poisonous spores from her skin.

tommy's doing the nervous lore laugh in that drawing

velvet is doing the anime lady hohoho pose while covered in blood. if he didn't have painful and complicated emotions about velvet turning to villainy, ant would be swooning

dont worry about why illumina is covered in blood it is absolutely not related to the series whatsoever /suspicious. instead consider how illumina (alias anima) is fruit's hero partner under chase co.

shoutout to @pixelperfunctory for this req. thats the most boomer ass lookin expression in the world

a brooding phil (not to be confused with a broody phil, which is c!phil). techno starts to see this expression more and more as they get older.

not to toot my own horn but foolish came out extraordinarily handsome in this drawing. he has some golden scales and they glimmer brighter when he's happy, which eret is very fond of.

grian, who we know as seraphim from wonderland, is remarkably scrungkly. he has three sets of wings and is a talented flier.

wilbur also came out quite beautiful, blood and tears notwithstanding. the next fic scheduled to be published hopefully either by the end of may or early june might shine some light on his expression here

sapnap, like ivory and shelby, would probably tear someone's throat out with his teeth given the opportunity. in the interim he gets thousands of thirst traps made of him by adoring stans.

i imagine that's the kind of AYO?? expression ponk makes whenever sam short-circuits the entire spark co. headquarters

my boy. he's not lookin too good

mapple (villain name kallisti, also known by other villain orgs as she of the heights) my scrungkly. in wasteland he's the leader of villain org team salad which is not at all what it appears to be. that particular drawing is a rare moment where he's being flustered by his very charming queerplatonic partner parkmo.

oh my love. by the time the silver age ends seto has been dead for six years. in life he was one of chase co.'s senior heroes, alias sigil, and he could control the wind. his friends - mitch and jerome, especially, who are the joint heads of chase co. - loved him very much.

[jellypear]

I think you're worth holding onto PT3

Ayo wassup @wolfythewitch, I return. I started this like a week ago and I've already got 8 pages on google docs, this is going really well for me.

Also! I posted this on AO3, and I'm going to update these around the same time so if you wanna stay up tp date and don't want to deal with the mess that is my tumblr go check it out there <3

--------------------------------

On the third day, the storm finally calms. 

The third day is also when Techno grows ill. 

There are consequences to bottling one's magic. And while these include more fantastical symptoms as the magic tries to escape, which can range anywhere from chilling the air around you, to summoning storms to setting off a magical inferno, though that’s in extreme cases, there are also the mundane symptoms. There’s the constant achiness, decreased stamina and a weaker constitution. 

(Phil has a plethora of recipes that can help. Not all of them are remedies as not all the symptoms can be fixed, but they sure do help.)

And despite Phil’s constant watch, the cocktail of bottled magic, storm drenched clothes and extensive journeying can only lead to one thing for Techno, and that’s sickness. 

Which leads Phil, ever the bleeding heart, to be seated here next to Techno’s bedside. 

He’s dutifully changing the damp cloth on Techno’s forehead to keep his fever down, making sure Techno keeps his fluid and blood sugar levels up no matter how much Techno doesn’t want to and keeping Tommy out of the room lest he also grow sick. Philza doesn’t want two sick kids in the cottage. 

Though keeping Tommy out of Techno’s room (which is totally not a spare storage room that Philza speed cleaned after realizing that he cannot keep his young guests in the living room) has never been easier. After all, with the storm gone the crows are back. And Tommy fucking loves the crows. 

(Philza later regrets the day he introduced Tommy to the crows. They get along like a house on fire. Phil fears that one day they will influence each other to start a house fire.)

But as much as Phil fears the consequences of this action, he needs Tommy safely out of the way so he can focus on Techno. And maybe it’s not wise to make a six year olds only guardian a murder of crows and give him free reign of a forest, but quite honestly it’s probably safer for him out there.

With the sickness Techno’s iron control over his magic, which Phil has witnessed many times in the past three days, grows dubious. He’s more prone to magical flare ups, ones larger than the sparks of the first night and the flames of the second, and it’s easier for Phil to be damage control with Tommy out of the house. 

Thus Phil stays by Techno’s side, keeping his fever down, his fluids up, cleaning up the frosts and the dews that appear and ushering away the sparks. 

(It reminds Phil of simpler, kinder times. And even though he longs for them, he feels as if beginning to understand why events occurred the way they did.) 

(Phil’s not a big believer in destiny, but he’s beginning to wonder.)

--------------------------------

Tommy Careful Danger Kraken Innit may be the biggest man there is, but he’s really fucking bored. 

Yeah Chat, the crows that Phil introduced him to, are really fucking cool.

(“There’s too many of them for them all to get an individual name so I call them Chat. They’ll look after you while I look after your brother”)

And being able to run around the forest is also really fucking cool, but he misses Techno. Yeah sure it’s only been like a few days since he got sick, but Tommy isn’t used to not having Techno constantly over his shoulder like a fucking shadow. 

The first few days were fun. No Techno telling him what to do and he was finally let outside? So fucking poggers. 

He spent the first little bit of it chattering to the crows as he explored the forest, and honestly it’s only been a couple days but Tommy already feels like he knows the whole thing like the back of his hand. 

He knows where to find the best berries, ones that aren’t poisonous but are very sweet and he knows where to find the clean streams and ponds where he can wash his hands of the berry juice. He knows where to find the hill with the best view and he’s found where there’s a small meadow, hidden between the trees that has the prettiest flowers and so many bees. 

He’s found all the best spots and climbed all the best trees and now he’s bored. 

Tommy’s tried exploring further into (or out of depending on your perspective) the forest, but everytime he passes a certain spot, one he can’t figure out, Chat begins squawking at him. And he means like, really losing their shit. 

So he can’t explore the forest further, he doesn’t want to explore the same areas alone again and he’s not allowed into Techno’s room.

…

But Philza’s in Techno’s room.

So Philza’s not in his room.

--------------------------------

Okay so as it turns out, Phil’s room is really boring. 

It’s just like. A bunch of books. His bed. A desk. Closet. 

Tommy's not great at reading, he’s better than to sleep on another big man’s bed, he already played with the hourglass on the desk for a bit and he can’t reach up high enough into the closet to get any of Phil’s clothes down. 

There’s a really old looking mirror on the wall though, that’s kinda cool. 

Clearly the answer here is to bring the chair over to the mirror. 

So that’s what he does.

He clambers on top of the chair and looks into the mirror. It’s got a bunch of drawings and crystals in it, but it’s cracked. 

“Well this is fuckin’ boring innit,” Tommy’s words lay still in the air for a moment.

Then the glass on the mirror riples. It’s as if someone dropped a pebble into a puddle and then put it in a mirror. 

For a moment the face of the mirror shines and its light is reflected onto Tommy. And then a face appears in the cracks. But it’s no longer Tommy’s face. It’s another boy, older than Techno but younger than Phil. He’s got dark curly hair and tired blue eyes, the same eyes that Phil has. He looks surprised.

“Oh, you’re not Phil”

--------------------------------

Orignal AU by Wolfy | AO3 | 1 | 2 | Part 3 | 4 |

[autism-corner]

Ayo look at this loser seeking comfort in fictional demons (its me im the loser)

another re-post (OG on ao3)

just some of the brothers comforting you&me <3

ft. Leviathan, Belphegor, Asmodeus & Beelzebub (200-300 words each)

Leviathan

Once you arrived at his door he could immediately tell something was wrong. It wasn't anything you had said, it's just that you were… a lot more quiet than usual. You were hesitant, and not at all like the human he had grown used to. 

Once the door was opened, you crashed into his arms. You both lay down somewhere, whether that is in his tub or on some splayed out beanbags. You lay curled up to his side, one of his arms over your shoulders. Your face is pressed into his neck, his hand is softly petting and calming you, while soothing words are being spoken by his soft voice. 

Once you've calmed down a bit he’ll ask you what you need, and do those things to the best of his abilities. If it's just him that you need, he will let you lay on his chest, and together you’ll read some fluffy manga. At the end of the night you’ll fall asleep in his arms, and before he also falls asleep he’ll give you some forehead kisses. 

If you approach him about it the next morning he’ll stutter something along the lines: ‘I- I- I mean,,, you would have done the same for me right? I- I- I can some- somewhat understand how you feel… please come to me next time too…’

--------------------------------

Belphegor

Finally having made it up the stairs of the attic, you open the door to see Belphegor already sleeping on the big bed. You get into the bed, as close to him as possible, and let it all out. Halfway through your rant/emotional breakdown/whatever he’ll likely be awake, but he won't let you notice since you don't really need him to talk right now. He will get closer to you once he realizes the situation, and wrap his arms around you so you’ll be nice, safe and cozy. 

Once you've calmed down and Belphie’s ‘woken up’, you’ll both likely stay in bed for a while. If you're up for it he will get a blanket and a lot of pillows, and lay those out in the observatory for a second cuddle session. Depending on your needs, he’ll let you talk, or he’ll let it be quiet, but it's most likely you’ll just lay together while belphie points at stars and tells their stories.

If you approach him about it later, he’ll likely dismiss it as ‘not that big of a deal’, and ‘you can come to me anytime, life is hard sometimes’ and ‘while I do enjoy cuddling with you, your safety and wellbeing comes first’. Secretly, he's very happy because HE is the one you went to for comfort, and that truly means a lot to him. He is very thankful you can be open to him. 

--------------------------------

Asmo

Asmo was just doing whatever in his room when he heard you knock. You were the only one that really knocked in this house, so excitedly he skipped over to the door. Upon seeing the state you are currently in, he’ll drag you inside and place you upon his bed, locking the door. This moment will be for the two of you. He’ll lay down next to you and place your head on his chest. While you let out everything you need to let out, he’ll pet your hair and respond to your emotions with quick nods and soothing noises. If the situation you're dealing with contains self-deprecation, he’ll take your head in his hands, and tell you all the things he loves about you. He himself is also way too familiar with those habits, so he's the best at trying to stop yours. 

Once you've calmed down he’ll ask if you want to do a spa day with just him, to help the both of you catch up and relax. You won't have to do anything, asmo says ‘Now, you just sit there and look pretty’, accompanied with a wink. No matter how hard the situation is, asmo will always lift up the mood. Depending on your needs, asmo could either talk your ears off, or will listen carefully to you, but most likely you’ll both be gossiping with eachother, distracting both of you from the reason(s) you’ve come here. 

If you approach him about it later, he’ll cheerfully respond ‘No problem sweetheart, anytime of course!’. You know that you can trust him, and he knows that you trust him. Maybe next time he’s having problems, you’ll help him in turn. In any case, he’ll look forward to hanging out with you again, no matter the circumstances. 

--------------------------------

Beelzebub

It's not often that you find Beel alone in his room, but you're happy he is this time. He’ll be doing whatever, laying on his bed and as soon as you walk in his protective mode will activate. He doesn't yet know how to handle these situations, but he’s trying his best. He’ll be sat upright with his arms open and inviting, allowing you to take place on his lap. His arms close around you and you can comfortably bury your head in his shoulder or chest to let it all out.  

Once you've calmed down you’ll both lay down, you still curled up by his side, and he’ll listen to you, or continue with whatever he was doing before, leaving you to rest. If his hunger comes up, he’ll carefully nudge you and ask if you’ll come with him to the kitchen. If not, he’ll ask Belphie to bring him some food, but if you're comfortable with it he’ll let you cling to him. On your way to the kitchen one of his brothers might pop up, and he’ll give them a look that could only mean ‘Leave us alone’ , causing you to have some time with Beel alone. While eating with one hand might be hard, he’ll manage if it means it’ll comfort you more. 

If you bring it up to him later, he’ll say ‘It wasn't a problem at all. Do please be careful. I won't mind helping next time, but stay safe, okay?’ He’ll give you a big grin and maybe ruffle your hair a bit. He really cares about you, even if it's hard for him to show it. 

[saiyanprincessswanie]

Hold My Hand

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 1353

Summary: Bucky and you help one another heal mentally while growing closer to each other.

Warning: Bucky and Reader working through trauma, emotional scenes, Bucky crying (yes it’s a warning)

A/N: thank you to my betas @pigwidgeonxo and @lfnr-blog-blog-blog & @music-culture-mythology (any mistakes on spelling & grammar are my own. Did this on my phone)

A/N 2: Song - Hold my Hand by Lady Gaga. Listen to the song here:

All GIFS are not mine and found on my GIF keyboard on iPhone.

Reblogs & Comments on Tumblr are welcomed and encouraged. 😊💜

I do NOT give my consent to have my work translated or reposted on any social media platform, apps, or third-party sites. If you see my work anywhere else besides my personal Tumblr & AO3 accounts then it has been stolen. I will NEVER give written or verbal permission to repost or translate any of my fanfics as they’re MY intellectual property. 🚫🚫

The gentle breeze blew across your skin as you overlooked the beautiful scenery of Wakanda. You had arrived here six months earlier as a victim of Hydra’s brainwashing. Your life was a series of broken memories and anger about what was taken from you. Steve Rogers had been the one to find you at a Hydra base during a mission with the Avengers. Seeing you in tattered clothes standing in a cell reminded him of his best friend Bucky Barnes whom he was trying to locate before the falling out of his team. You were a broken woman both physically and mentally. The Wakandan King, T’Challa had promised to help you the best they could with the resources that they had. Thankfully treatment had been helping you when another former Hydra operative, the Winter Soldier, or as you knew him now, Bucky Barnes, arrived in Wakanda. 

At first, you both kept your respective distances as you went about therapy, him having the Soldier’s trigger words removed and you trying to piece your life together. It wasn’t until a couple of months later that you found yourselves with the Wakandan people, laughing around a bonfire. You were both dressed in the beautiful Wakandan attire. Your eyes seemed to lock across the fire, both offering the other a smile. Finally you each introduced yourselves and made small talk that night. It was almost as if time stood still for you both. 

Hand in hand you spoke of your pasts and the evil Hydra did. You both talked until the sun came up that morning. By then you knew each other’s history but neither were judgmental of the other's darkness. What you did know is that you didn’t want to face another day without the other. 

Hold my hand, everything will be okay

I heard from the heavens that clouds have been gray

Bucky walked hand in hand until you reached your hut overseeing the same lake that his hut also sat on. When he said goodbye you could tell his past was creeping up on him, so you gently pulled him in for a hug and kissed him on the cheek.

Pull me close, wrap me in your aching arms

I see that you're hurtin', why'd you take so long

Time went by and you ended up with a routine with him. Together you walked to therapy and parted for your one-on-one therapy. Then afterward you spent your time doing whatever your heart desired. It wasn’t until one day that Bucky told you about what Ayo planned to do. He explained, “to make sure the trigger words don’t activate the Soldier she wants to say them to me later tonight. I was wondering if you would be by my side to help me through it.”  

Smiling back at him you nodded. “Of course, Bucky. I won’t leave your side. I’m here if you need me.” Later that night you would face his fears together hand in hand. 

To tell me you need me? I see that you're bleedin'

You don't need to show me again

But if you decide to, I'll ride in this life with you

I won't let go 'til the end

Bucky and you sat around a bonfire holding hands as Ayo asked if he was sure he wanted to do this with you there as it could be dangerous. Both you and Bucky reassured her you weren’t going anywhere.

Ayo spoke softly, “It’s time.”

Bucky stared into the fire as his flesh hand gripped yours. “Are you sure about this?”

“I won’t let you hurt anyone,” Ayo reassured him as she started slowly saying the words. 

“желание. ржавый. семнадцать.”

“It’s not gonna work.” Bucky hesitantly responded.

“рассвет.”

Bucky’s eyes started to tear up as he gripped your hand tighter and took a deep breath. The image of the red book that held those wicked words flashed across his mind.

“печь.”

Bucky’s mind thought back to being held in a secure box with Zemo in front of him. 

“девять”

Then it cut to him quickly during his fight with Steve, the man on the bridge. Bucky was trying to control his breathing but it was hard to remain focused.

“доброкачественный”

His mind thought of the chair they strapped him to. Of riding a motorcycle and hitting a car off the road. Then killing the occupants.

“возвращениr е на родину”

Bucky grits his teeth together as the image of him above a battered Steve enters his mind. Tears continue to fill his eyes as he doesn’t let go of you.

“один. грузовой вагон.”

Tears were now flowing down his face, still he doesn’t look away from the flames. The words didn’t work.

“You are free, you are free,” Ayo said softly as Bucky looked up at her still crying, and then he looked at you. You wrapped him in your arms as he cried.

So cry tonight

But don't you let go of my hand

You can cry every last tear

I won't leave 'til I understand

Promise me, just hold my hand

With Bucky free from the Winter Soldier trigger words things seemed to be going better between you. There seemed to be some hope now behind his blue eyes that wasn’t there before. He smiled more and even started teasing you in a playful manner. What was once a hollow man was now someone who was finding himself again. Now it was Bucky’s turn to help you face your fears. He looked into your fearful eyes and told you it was time to let go of the anger.

Raise your head, look into my wishful eyes

That fear that's inside you will lift, give it time

I can see everything you're blind to now

Your prayers will be answered, let God whisper how

You sat in therapy with Bucky next to you. There you spoke of a dream you had. “It felt so real. Like I was there again. I was sparring with a Hydra agent like usual until my handler told him not to hold back. He struck me hard in the stomach, knocking the wind out of me. I was angry with every hit he landed. I waited until he started mocking me then I took him to the ground. I struck him repeatedly until I was pulled off his unconscious body. They punished me for defending myself. I think of what would have happened if I gave up. I guess I wouldn’t be here.” Your eyes shifted to look at Bucky. “I can’t explain it but I’m feeling more of myself every day I spend with Bucky. To know he is by my side, my ride or die, well I’m very lucky to have someone who wants to spend forever with me.” Tears watered in your eyes as you expressed your feelings to Bucky and the counselor. Your hand grabbed his vibranium one and held on tightly. 

To tell me you need me, I see that you're bleedin'

You don't need to show me again

But if you decide to, I'll ride in this life with you

I won't let go 'til the end

So cry tonight

But don't you let go of my hand

You can cry every last tear

I won't leave 'til I understand

Promise you'll just hold my hand

It has been several months now and you have finally finished your part of the therapy with the help from Bucky. Both of you still have worries about your past and the pain that you went through but you remind each other that you aren’t going anywhere.

Bucky looks at you and smiles. “Don’t ever give up on yourself. We will make it through this life together no matter what our past was. We can be happy again and have the future we want. Just hold my hand and don’t let go.”

I know you're scared and your pain is imperfect

But don't you give up on yourself

I've heard a story, a girl, she once told me

That I would be happy again

Hold my hand

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[shiny-jr]

Hello! Just wanted to say I absolutely adored your Damnation AU and Isekai Impostor AU for Twst!! The way you write the characters is amazing and you've convinced me to actually start playing the game haha! I also read and enjoyed your other stories on Quotev. I want you to know that you're an amazing author, keep up the good work (ah, but please don't overdo it, I hope you take plenty of rest too)! 🫶🫶🫶

I'm not sure if it's been asked before and I just missed it, but I was wondering if it's okay if we wrote a continuation of sorts on one of the results on Damnation (specifically for Chieftain MC) and posted it on Ao3? It's given me writing brainrot ever since I read the result and I just can't stop thinking about the idea. Of course, I'll give you credit and link back to your quiz on Quotev + Tumblr.

I understand as well if you'd prefer we didn't, either way it's your story to share and I'll appreciate any response you give! Thanks again for writing Damnation and being my gateway drug dealer to Twst!! 🫶🫶🫶

Ayo? I've never been called a gateway drug dealer to twst?? That's a new one. Anyways, thank you so much, anon. I'm kinda honored that I could even get someone to remotely consider playing the game, but I hope you're enjoying it so far! And Quotev too? Wow. Haven't posted anything there in a hot minute but that's where all my old and original stuff is. Been thinking about posting there again, but we gotta see. And don't worry, I guess I'll kinda consider this time of not writing much as a break. Hopefully my motivation comes back though.

As for the second part of your ask, I don't believe I've ever been asked that. Yeah, I say sure, why not? I'm happy that it could inspire someone so much, and I'm curious to see what you can think of with it. I mentioned this in other asks, but Savanaclaw's result was actually gonna be way more different but in the end it just wasn't. I'd actually be super interested to see what you make of it! So yeah, go for it. Please tag me, because I would love to read it!

[evilhasnever]

Time for a wedding, set in the same reincarnation AU as this and this ficlet by me and this (by @lansplaining)! Btw, I have collected all previous parts in a series on Ao3 for ease of reading: Memory Lane (get it?)

A few people wanted to see what would happen if JGY recovered his memories, which means there is angst coming up... (this drabble turned into 3000 words, so Ao3 link if you prefer!)

For all that Lan Xichen knows his past life, he cannot tell the future. And the future seems dead set on tripping him up, as if holding a grudge in order to counterbalance whatever advantage his past memories may give him. 

That is to say, Meng Yao disappears the morning they are supposed to get married. 

It was not meant to be a big affair, but even a small modern ceremony ends up being a complex production when overzealous friends and overly-traditional relatives are involved. Lan Huan and Meng Yao had agreed to go to the venue separately, both to appease the loudest aunties and to build up some excitement for their own reunion as husbands. This means Lan Huan has slept at Wangji’s place for the past two days, leaving Meng Yao alone in the apartment they share, and has forced himself not to text him constantly over the past forty-eight hours.

At 10 in the morning on the day of the ceremony, Lan Huan is sweating in his tux on the way to the venue, driven by Wangji; he’s fruitlessly trying to meditate to keep calm, but he can’t quite stamp down his eagerness. For once his nerves are of the positive, tickling variety reserved for happy occasions - he doesn’t expect anything to go wrong today, considering A-Yao planned everything. 

He should have known better. 

When they are ten minutes away, Lan Huan’s cell phone rings, spooking both brothers out of their meditative silence. It’s Meng Shi, calling from the reception hall. It sounds like she has a hand on the receiver so as not to be overheard.

"A-Huan, A-Yao is not here."

Lan Xichen blanches. “He is what…?”

“He is not here. He is always here first, heavens knows he would be checking every single napkin even on his own wedding day, but today…”

“ I’m sure there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. Didn’t you go the venue together?”

“No, he called me a taxi. He said he had an errand to run, but that was two hours ago and he is not answering his phone. He always tells me where he is, A-Huan, and now…!”

“Perhaps he is just late,” Lan Xichen murmurs, his pulse already picking up speed because the very idea is absurd. “What kind of errand? The cake? A-Yao is always very particular about catering…”

“He didn’t say. A-Huan, did something happen?”

“Not that I know of, but I didn’t see him yesterday, we wanted to play up the anticipation a little…” Lan Huan admits. “Did you see him for dinner last night?” 

“Yes, I did… A-Yao said he wasn’t feeling well, but I thought it was just nerves,” Meng Shi carefully says, and Lan Huan can almost imagine her pursing her lips. “He said he ran out on his own stag party. I didn’t think much of it, A-Yao has never liked surprise parties.”

Lan Xichen’s brow furrows. “I’ll make some calls. Please wait there, and call me if he arrives.”

He tries A-Yao’s number, but it goes straight to voicemail. He leaves a quick message, just to be safe: “A-Yao, are you ok? I’m almost at the venue. Let me know if something happened, alright? I love you.”

Carefully ignoring Wangji’s glance in the rear view mirror, he shoots a text to Mingjue and another to Jin Zixuan, asking if A-Yao is coming with them by any chance. Huaisang calls him back from his brother’s phone immediately. “Xichen-ge, did you lose your fiance?”

“Miscommunication,” Lan Xichen replies tightly. “What happened at the stag party, Huaisang?” 

“Ayo, I don’t know anything! Xuanyu and I put him in the car and he freaked out as if we were some gangsters coming for his family. He was absolutely no fun the whole evening, after I prepared all the decorations and even the stripper–I mean, the entertainment!”

Lan Xichen pinches the bridge of his nose, feeling the grasping hands of a migraine growing in the back of his skull. “We will discuss this at a later time, Huaisang. Did A-Yao do or say anything strange at the party?”

“He hardly said anything at all, and then he just up and left when we tried to put a veil on him for the photos! Total spoilsport. Did he get cold feet?”

“He is late.”

Huaisang gasps in horror. 

“I just want to make sure he is safe. Do you know where he was yesterday afternoon, before you kidnapped him?”

“I resent that wording! Anyway, I think he went to pick up his wedding tux with Jin Zixuan. Trying to be a good brother wa—y too late if you ask me.”

“Alright, thanks. See you at the reception, Huaisang.”

“Is it… still on? Just wondering if I need to get dressed.”

“I’d appreciate yours and your brother’s presence either way,” Lan Xichen says, wryly. 

“'mkay, ge. Best of luck.”

When they reach the wedding venue, they are momentarily intercepted by Shufu - Lan Xichen smiles and dodges him, ear glued to his phone as Wangji shadows him to the waiting room and locks the door. 

When they are alone, Lan Huan turns to his brother. “Wangji. A-Yao should already be here, but I can’t track him down.”

Wangji’s gaze hardens imperceptibly, and Lan Xichen takes a deep breath and lifts his hands in a pacifying gesture. “I am worried about him. His mother doesn’t know where he is either.” 

“Why would he flee?” Wangji asks. 

“We should not jump to conclusions,” Lan Xichen cautions, “He… he should have no reason to do so.” 

“The reasons may be unrelated to the past,” Wangji offers, after a thoughtful moment. “Car accident, panic attack.” 

“Alright, let’s… one thing at a time,” Lan Huan chuckles nervously, trying to push down the bubble of fear growing in his stomach.

For the next few minutes, they both busy themselves calling local hospitals. Thankfully, nobody that looks like A-Yao has been taken to any of the city ERs this morning. Lan Xichen exhales, then dials A-Yao’s number again, letting it ring off the hook. 

When it goes to voicemail again, he decides to try his luck and call Jin Zixuan’s number, which he has only because he is very thorough and always prepared for emergencies - or so he thought, at any rate.

“Ah, Lan Xichen,” Zixuan answers on the third ring. “Are you calling to tell me not to come to the wedding? Because A-Li and I are almost there! I already left several apologies on A-Yao’s answering machine, but I don’t know how my brother’s mind works…”

“Why would you apologize?” Lan Xichen asks, suddenly alert. “Did something happen yesterday?”

“It was odd,” Zixuan grunts, and there are background baby noises for a short while - Lan Xichen holds his breath until Zixuan resumes speaking. “One moment he was all dimples, then when he tried on his wedding tux he stopped dead and looked like he’d short-circuited. Stuck like a mannequin. I’ve never seen him not frenetic, which is why I asked him if he perhaps didn’t like the suit? Told him if we paid extra we could get him another one in time for the wedding, though it would not be custom-made… he wasn’t listening at all, just doing this wide-eyed face in the mirror. I had told him that white was not his color, but the reaction seemed extreme!”

“Zixuan, I need to know exactly what he said. Word for word, if you could be so kind.”

Another long sigh, more baby noises. “Well. I forgive him, because god knows I was panicking the day before my wedding, but–he said I should be dead.”

Oh . 

“I have to go,” Lan Xichen whispers, and hangs up.

He turns swiftly to his brother. “Wangji. I need you to ask your boyfriend to track A-Yao’s phone, stat.”

Wangji’s eyebrows rise in unadulterated shock, but to his credit he doesn't deny that Wei Wuxian can absolutely do that.

“I… I don’t know where he would go,” Lan Huan admits. “Not in this life.” Where would he run? The uncertainty makes him feel unmoored, like he’s being pulled down by a turbulent sea and can’t keep himself afloat. “I think it’s a... memory emergency.”

“I will ask Wei Ying.”

It takes what feels like an eternity, though in truth Lan Xichen is aware that Wei Wuxian accomplishes the task in a criminally speedy manner, and without asking any questions. Not while he’s in earshot, anyway.

“I sent you the last known location,” Wei Wuxian shrugs at last, “but I dunno if he still has the phone on him or he dumped it.” 

“Thank you, Wei Wuxian. Wangji… can I take your car?”

“Mn.” For a moment, Lan Huan can see his brother wants to offer to go with him, so he shakes his head in silence. Wangji hands over the keys and squints at him. “Brother… remember the rule.”

“I know. The past is not the present. The present is not the future. I know, Wangji.” 

“Sooo… what do we do with the wedding?" Wei Wuxian interjects, apparently not grasping the gravity of the situation. "We have the venue booked until 2pm but I’m sure they have people lined up for later…”

“I’m sure you’ll think of some way to buy time,” Lan Xichen smiles tightly. “I’ll call you when I’m on my way back.”

“Did you hear that, Lan er-gege? We gotta think of a distraction~ you got any ideas?” 

Lan Xichen is out of the door and behind the wheel as fast as he can be. He keeps an eye on his phone, but the only updates he gets are from Meng Shi saying A-Yao isn’t there yet, and Shufu reminding him of the schedule and cancellation fees. 

He tracks down the coordinates to an off-season beach two hours south, a straight line from the city. There’s a parking lot nearby, but it’s empty - A-Yao doesn’t have a car. He pictures him telling an Uber driver to just drive until he tells him to stop, and his heart aches. Still, some irrational hope nestles inside him, whispering that perhaps A-Yao hasn’t thrown away his phone yet. That he may want to be found. 

Lan Xichen parks hurriedly across two spaces and hurries out to the sea, sinking in the sand with every step. He pauses to kick off his dress shoes, then resumes running down the seashore. With immense relief, he spots A-Yao, a tiny white-clad figure in the distance, a few hundred meters down the desolate stretch of sea. 

Is it embedded somewhere in A-Yao’s soul to run away to the sea, despite knowing that in this life he cannot swim?

“A-Yao!” he calls out, waving his arms clumsily. There is absolutely nobody else out in January, no umbrellas and no chairs, so A-Yao will certainly see him coming from afar - no point making his approach cautious. Lan Xichen had half expected A-Yao to turn tail and make him chase him, but miraculously he does not.

“A-Yao,” he gasps again when he catches up to him, tugging at his collar. “Are you alright, A-Yao?”

His A-Yao turns, dark-rimmed eyes and windswept hair, terse like a winter morning. He’s undone his bowtie and popped a few buttons at his collar, the tuxedo jacket thrown over his shoulder. 

“The last time I saw you, you would not call me that anymore,” Jin Guangyao says, his voice raspy from the wind. 

“You saw me yesterday morning, A-Yao,” Lan Huan soothes, stepping towards him with his hand outstretched. 

“Right.” A-Yao chuckles humorlessly, and draws a circle in the sand with a naked foot. The hem of his pants is caked in wet sand, but he does not seem to mind. “I meant… before.” 

He looks down, a strange smile on his face, then takes off his engagement ring and holds it out towards Lan Xichen, without looking up at him. “I should return this.”

Despite the fear gripping his heart, Lan Huan shakes his head firmly. “It’s yours. You don't have to keep it, but I don’t want it back.”

A-Yao’s hand lowers, a little hesitantly. Then his razorblade gaze snaps up and pierces Lan Xichen where he stands. “Er-ge. Can you tell me why every wedding of mine comes with a side of lies?” 

Lan Xichen stands to attention. “I never lied to you, A-Yao.”

“You never told me you remembered the past.” It is not a question, so Lan Xichen does not treat it as such.

“Would you have wanted to know?” he asks instead.

A-Yao doesn’t reply for a moment, gaze returning to the gray wintry sea. “What I don’t understand,” he says to the waves, “is why you sought me out, if you remembered.” 

“A-Yao... Even if we’d been complete strangers, I would still have fallen for you. But all the more because I remembered you, how could I not seek you out?” Lan Xichen frowns at his poor wording; he had prepared this speech a million times, but now it scatters like sand in the breeze. “My family has a rule against approaching people from the past, did you know? But A-Yao…  what do I have these memories for, if not to find you?”

A-Yao’s gaze drops to the sand at his feet, the cold waves lapping at his ankles. “Even after everything?”

Lan Xichen closes his eyes briefly. He’s had a lot of time to think about this. “I’m here, aren’t I?’

The reply seems to strike true. A-Yao looks taken aback, but Lan Xichen dares to hope it's a good kind of surprise. Like that time he surprised A-Yao at the airport with flowers, or the time he offered to teach him to play the qin. He hazards another step closer to him, a mere arm’s length from A-Yao. He aches to touch him, but he can’t. Not yet. 

“Mother’s treatment,” A-Yao says abruptly. “Tell me straight.”

“Yes,” Lan Xichen inclines his head. “You and I hadn’t met yet, so I asked a friend to make an anonymous donation in my place.” 

A-Yao purses his lips. “I suppose I must thank you.”

“I didn't do it to earn your thanks,” Lan Xichen sighs. “Knowing and not acting would have been unthinkable, that is all.”

“Still, thank you. My mother is… she is everything.” A-Yao looks younger, vulnerable for the space of a breath.

Lan Xichen smiles. “I care for her too. Your mother is wonderful.”

A-Yao almost smiles at that, but it fades before it can reach the top half of his face, his eyes narrowing again in scrutiny. 

“You introduced me to Qin Su at June’s charity luncheon. Did you invite her?” 

Lan Xichen swallows, painfully. “I did not invite her, but she was there.” He bites his lip. “I looked into it. You are… not related, in this life.” 

A-Yao makes a little ‘hah’ sound, as swift as paper ripping. “I’m happy for her. But why did you go out of your way to introduce her to me? You and I had just started dating.”

All Lan Huan can do is shrug, his shoulders stiff and frozen in the confines of his tuxedo. “Tempting fate, I suppose.” 

“Still unfailingly selfless,” A-Yao hums, and it is a little too dry to feel like praise.

They look at a pair of seagulls chasing each other among cacophonous screams. They sound particularly shrill, drawing playful circles in the air and around each other.

“It is selfishness,” Lan Xichen eventually admits. “I just wanted to make sure that… I just wanted to make sure.” 

A-Yao shakes his head with a small exhale, barely a chuckle. He drops his jacket on the sand and lifts both arms to cup Lan Xichen’s jaw, pulling him slightly closer. His fingers are frozen cold, his eyes dark and serious, with an intensity that halts Lan Xichen’s breath halfway up his throat. 

“Lan Xichen, Lan Xichen... in a world in which I can marry you, how could I ever not?” The words, carefully enunciated, hit Lan Xichen’s chilled face in small, warm puffs of breath. A-Yao is not smiling, and that, for some reason, puts Lan Huan’s heart at ease. It gives his words the resonance of unfailing truth, a timeless verdict.

“We still could,” he hopefully offers. “Well, if Wei Wuxian managed to stall enough.” 

A-Yao snorts softly, then shakes his head. “Not now. I think… I need to get away.”

He surely notices the sheer horror on Lan Xichen’s face, because his brows knit together in an apologetic squint. “Not forever, gege. Just for a little while, to get my head in order.”

Lan Xichen folds his arms behind his back, and leans into A-Yao’s hands cupping his jaw. “We still have the honeymoon to Japan booked for tomorrow…”

A-Yao chuckles, breathless and disbelieving. Then his dark, half-lidded eyes scan Lan Xichen’s face, considering. “...You’d come?”

“Unquestioningly,” Lan Xichen says. “Right now, if you wanted to.”

“With no luggage?”

“I don’t need anything.”

The answer seems to please A-Yao, because his smile turns a shade more secretive, lashes lowering on his cheeks.

Still, he hedges, thumb tracing Lan Xichen’s chin in direct contradiction with his words. “Er-ge… I can’t ask you to…” 

“You need not to ask,” Lan Xichen smiles, eager, desperate to give away his heart. “If we drive to the airport now, we can catch an earlier flight. I’ll call on the way there.”

“A honeymoon while we are still not married,” A-Yao smirks. “What would your shufu say?”

Lan Xichen grins at him with infinite tenderness. “We can marry anytime, but we can only elope once.”

A little skittish, A-Yao puts his hand in his nonetheless, tugging him along as they amble towards the parking lot. They shake the sand off their pants, exchanging half smiles at the state of their attire. They spend an awkward minute tracking down their discared shoes.

When they’re safely in the car, Lan Xichen offers his smartphone to him. “I’m all for eloping, but call your mother and Wangji to make sure they don’t worry, will you?” 

A-Yao brushes Lan Xichen’s knuckles delicately before taking his phone from him, and laughs. It’s small, but as wonderful as the first time.