#as someone who is also prone to codependency

[doritofalls]

hi can i just say thank you thank you for getting kiyo so right... i hate when ppl overly baby/make his healing process so fast but you actually give kiyo healing nuance and like a breather and while u also clearly have a ship in mind you dont have shuichi be like his one true savior that instantly make him no longer mentally ill but a friend who helped him a long the way, this is the kiyo content i starved for and i thank you with every part of my heart for this

ANON YOU ARE SO SWEET......thank you!! i like kiyo a lot and i really strive to write him well. i really think he was never MEANT to be getting better from the start, so i gotta stretch and squeeze some of his characterization when it comes to writing any kinda recovery or development... i'm very happy if it makes a genuine impression though!

haha i feel a little bad about the ship angle - i have read people make the complaint that every kiyo recovery au is shipping based, and i definitely see why that would be annoying or distracting. but honestly, even if just in a platonic capacity, i really don't think kiyo COULD make good progress alone? he is a person extremely prone to codependence, to the absolute limit of creating a reality where he is never alone as far as he's concerned, and i think if that was to be stripped away from him it would need to be replaced with...something. some kind of interpersonal support line. i chose shuichi for that, because again i'm a sucker for them together, but i can easily imagine rantaro or ryoma in a similar role. angie too probably, though she's also got her own stuff to figure out big time.

you're right too that people don't just,, get better. healing from trauma's a game of walking up stairs where you may feel content with where you are in the present, eventually. thus i don't think kiyo would be like, done with this journey if he lived till the end of v3's plotline. what i want to explore more in the au is him starting to feel more comfortable with existing as his own person/maybe starting to learn the ropes of connections without a constant toxic need to belong to someone. so i imagine, by the end, he'd be on a marginally stable patch but with a Lot of the healing still ahead of him.

[celestialtarot11]

Solar return observations pt 2 🦋🌟✨

Hi friends! Welcome back to another post as this was requested by a few of you 💗 feel free to like comment and reblog! ✨🌟

Chiron in the 8th house 🌹🌙- The native may feel their spiritual beliefs are expanding, or what they originally believed in is not necessarily the whole truth. Natives with this placement often experience “another side” to what they thought was true, usually in a religious or occult sense. For example, someone with this placement believes in Christianity, but a circumstance happened outside of them which had their curiosity move towards another religion, or they simply focused on spirituality. Were there more to life than they previously understood? Often times the native will ask themselves this.

Mars in Gemini 🦋🌙- The native may feel the need to join a social media circle that year and assert themselves in a new community! The native may find themselves searching for truth of some kind, whether it’s related to an occult sense, or a practical matter. The native that year will pursue higher knowledge through others.

Neptune in the 7th ✨🤍- Relationships with others are deepening. Boundaries are dissolving, which is why it’s important to recognize your own before others tell you them. It’s easy to view people through rose colored lenses, and to feel in touch with your heart this year. You may meet spiritual people, or a spiritual partner that’ll help you expand your dreams ✨ codependency is a common theme that year, so its important to look out for those cycles. You may end up attending events and drinking at some point

Moon in the 6th house 🌷🥂- Honestly this gives me the vibes of someone being a farmer off in the far lands 🤣 but anyway, the native will most likely retreat that year into their comfort zone. Socializing can drain the natives battery, and will find that work could be demanding that year. Fluctuations in work schedules are common, and most likely the native can find tension because their moods are sensitive to their environment. The native is prone to being sick much more due to picking up energy from their environment that year, so cleanse!

5th house stellium 💘☀️- Opportunity to meet new people and go out in style! Connecting with others helps you connect to yourself. Potential to meet a partner and best friend that year. Especially with Venus in there and Mercury. Mercury denotes you may meet them online, and Venus suggests a romantic opportunity. Depending on which sign this stellium falls in, your creativity will be channeled differently. If it’s in Capricorn you’ll find yourself being creative in a disciplined, practical way. You may be reserved when it comes to fun that year, and may have issues of letting yourself enjoy.

Sun in the 4th 🤗🌷- Someone with this placement had their father moving in and out of their apartment for an entire year. So the father could play an important role in your life much more this year. He could try to be involved with the native emotionally, but since its in the 4th house he brings more turbulence and instability, than something consistent. Also family will be more important this year, you’ll be surrounded by your family members a lot more!

Jupiter 7th house 🤍🌟- The potential to be with someone for the long term! Someone who gives a lot, someone humorous, and with a lot of knowledge. Someone pursuing higher education, if not, this person travels a lot for work. Depending in which zodiac sign Jupiter falls in, it’ll tell you about that person you’ll be with for a while. For example, if its in Pisces, you’ll meet someone with abundant spiritual knowledge and experience. Someone who likes to mix drinks, and get high. Someone who is a dreamer and has deep occult ties to the underworld 🤣💘 but is a softie!

Uranus aspecting Jupiter in the 7th house 🌟- Someone I knew with this placement got into their first relationship at 20. It was a shock to them being that they didn’t think they would ever meet someone that fast, or it would develop into something like that. It was a long distant connection given Uranus is aspecting the 7th house. When Aquarius was looked at, Moon & Saturn fell in Aquarius in his SR chart and he formed a very close bond to them! It was a relationship that progressed over time, a year. So how it started was random, but how it continued was different!

Scorpio Rising 🥂🙈- The native will go through many transformations that year. Focus on the self and releasing the past is important that year. The native can also find wealth this year, financially speaking and may indulge in a side hustle! Someone I knew with this placement had a cycle from a few years ago return, in order to be healed properly and the way it deserves. For him, it was a sense of self worth, he struggled with that and had circumstances happen in which he had to develop his confidence. In which he had to make decisions for himself. A physical glow up is also something that happened too.

Venus in Scorpio 🌷🦋- Transformation in love, relationship and connections. Old wounds come up to be released, especially fear of intimacy that year. Its likely the native may meet someone who will hold up a mirror to their wounding and triggers are common, its to help them become aware of what needs to change within themselves. The native could struggle with wanting to be seen, but hiding themselves as a form of protection. Release and work through protective mechanisms that worked in the past, and aren’t suitable for the present moment.

Thank ya’ll so much for reading 🤍 Hope this resonated & please feel free to share your feedback! Its always appreciated 🌟✨ have a great day/night everyone 💅🏻

[blakeswritingimagines]

Dating Yandere Jon Snow Would Include:

For starters, you should know that he's incredibly protective of the person he loves. He's possessive, obsessive, and extremely jealous. He's also prone to intense emotional outbursts, which can lead to him acting out in ways that may not be the best for either of you both. It's important to recognize that these behaviors can be toxic and harmful to the relationship, and in the end, he may end up driving you away.

While I'm sure there are different ways to handle dating a yandere, I would recommend focusing on understanding the source of his behavior and being mindful of triggering him.

In addition to obsessive and violent behaviors, he may use emotional manipulation to try and control your actions. The constant fear that you may leave him can quickly turn into guilt-tripping and gaslighting. He may also use threats of suicide or self-harm, as well as stalking and defamation, to keep you under his control. In short, he will do whatever it takes to keep you to himself, even if it means hurting you in the process.

Dating him as a yandere can be emotionally draining, as he might often act out in rage and other extreme emotions. He may also exhibit controlling behaviors, such as limiting who you can interact with or spending every moment with you. His extreme jealousy and possessiveness over you may cause you to feel trapped or smothered. In addition, his constant need for approval can wear you down, emotionally speaking. Ultimately, dating a yandere partner can be a rollercoaster, leaving one walking on eggshells and tiptoeing around his unstable emotions.

In addition, he can be unpredictable and impulsive in his attempts to keep you to himself. This can involve a range of behaviors, from manipulating or bribing others to interfere with his lover's plans, to threatening or physically harming those who get in his way. He may also become overly clingy and demanding of you, seeking constant reassurance and not allowing you room for yourself. The obsession he has for you can take a toll on your mental health, and result in a damaging codependent relationship.

He is also highly unpredictable in his mood swings. He can go from loving and doting on you, to angry and violent, over very small issues or misunderstandings. In order to 'protect' your relationship. He may even resort to illegal acts, such as stalking and kidnapping, to ensure that you stay with him.

He is extremely jealous and possessive. He feared that you might leave him for someone else, and this could cause even more extreme emotional distress in him. He may resort to all kinds of extreme and controlling behaviors in order to keep you from being in situations where you could fall for someone else. This can include threats, manipulation, and even violence, in order to ensure that you stay with him. He may also become obsessed with the idea of you leaving him, and become paranoid about any signs of you losing interest in him.

While he can become obsessive, jealous, and controlling, he can also be highly affectionate and loving. He may love you intensely and become emotionally dependent on your companionship. He may want to spend as much time as possible with you and seek out your affection and approval. He may also seek out more physical intimacy from you when like this, and become clingy and possessive in his affection.

He may become overly dependent on you for his own happiness and self-worth. He may be extremely clingy, and become emotionally distraught when you are apart. He will not let you out of his sight or be out of contact with you for long periods of time. The obsessive nature of his jealousy and possessiveness may cause him to isolate you, and become controlling in order to ensure that you don't have contact with others who may take you away from him.

Going on dates with him can be a very intense experience. He may plan the most elaborate dates, and shower you with gifts and affection on the date itself. This could entail romantic meals, activities, and even surprises, in order to keep the day as exciting as possible. However, his obsessive and possessive nature may make him overly clingy and protective on the date. He'll become jealous of others who might get in the way of your enjoyment, or become overly controlling in order to ensure that the date goes exactly as he had planned.

He'll use rewards to reward good behavior from you and to punish bad behavior. This can involve gifts, praise, and even physical affection. If you had done something to make him feel jealous or insecure, he may punish you by withholding affection or being cold and standoffish. He may also resort to manipulation and threats in order to prevent you from misbehaving. On the other hand, if you have done something to make him feel loved and secure, he'll reward you with presents, praise, and physical affection.

His obsessive and manipulative behaviors can often be difficult for others to stop, as he has a tendency to react very strongly to any intervention. If someone tries to interfere with his relationship, he may resort to extreme and potentially violent measures in order to keep them away. He may be verbally abusive, or try to manipulate or physically harm them in order to protect his relationship with you and ensure that you remain with him. Any attempts to break you and him apart will be met with his blind rage, and could potentially lead to catastrophic and serious consequences.

Marriage to you likely represents the ultimate expression of his true obsessive nature. He wants to be permanently entangled with you, both emotionally and legally. For a yandere, the idea of owning their partner and ensuring that they have no escape or other options can be extremely appealing. In a marriage, he would expect you to constantly acknowledge or respect him as your owner, and be subservient to him in all matters. He may even become obsessive about the marriage, and seek to control all aspects of your life even more than before, both inside and outside your household.

He may see having children with you as a further manifestation of his ownership and possessiveness over you. He may be obsessively protective of your children, and seek to ensure that they are raised according to his values and preferences. He may even try to enforce rules and restrictions upon them, and be very strict and controlling in his parenting. His obsession may become overwhelming and could end up damaging your children's mental well-being.

He may not take the news of your not having children well. He is known to react violently to any perceived threat or loss to his relationship, and you not having his children might be perceived as such in his mind. He may get angry, or become verbally abusive towards you. He may even blame you for what in his mind is infertility, and try to force you to seek medical treatment or other means of having children. He may even resort to physical violence or manipulation to make you comply with his wishes.

He'll become obsessive about your health, and seek to protect you from any signs of sickness or weakness. He'll become extremely concerned and worried about your well-being and may take control of your healthcare and recovery. He'll also become overprotective, and seek to shelter you from any stress or risks to your recovery. He may even try to control your diet, activities, and even medications, in order to ensure that you get better as soon as possible.

He would react extremely negatively to your desire to leave the relationship. He may feel deeply insecure and abandoned, and his obsessive and possessive tendencies would come into the forefront. He would be likely to become extremely manipulative and controlling, in order to keep you from leaving him. This could involve threats of violence, emotional blackmail, and even physical force. He'll also try to convince you that you are better off with him than without him and that you are not capable of surviving on your own.

He can be extremely manipulative in his attempts to keep you to himself. He'll use guilt-tripping, blackmail, or emotional manipulation to ensure that you do not have the freedom to choose your decisions. He may also use love bombing, sex, or other forms of pleasure to control you and keep you with him forever. His obsession with you can lead to even more controlling behavior and the destruction of trust in the relationship. The manipulation he'll use can be destructive to your mental health as well as your relationship.

He may also experience feelings of sadness, loneliness, and abandonment when you don't give him the attention he desires. This can lead to a cycle of emotional extremes, from extreme sadness and depression to extreme jealousy and rage, where his feelings consume him. He will also find himself struggling to process and express his emotions in a healthy way only on good days, as his obsessive and controlling behavior takes over. In addition, he may also struggle to form new relationships outside of you, as he relies on you for all his emotional needs.

He can also experience deep emotional distress when he feels that you are distancing yourself from him or drifting away from him. This can trigger more of his obsessive and controlling behavior and can cause him to become emotionally unstable. This may result in him doing things that are dangerous or unreasonable in an attempt to keep you from leaving. He may even resort to self-harm or suicidal thoughts due to his extreme emotions and inability to handle them. These intense emotions, while powerful and overwhelming, are ultimately unhealthy for both himself and you.

It is possible that he might just listen to you, but it would likely only happen in limited circumstances. If you made a reasonable and logical argument or request, he may be willing to listen and consider it. However, if you make a request that goes against his wishes, he may be reluctant to change his behavior. If you persist, he may resort to manipulative or abusive tactics in an attempt to control the situation to his preferred outcome.

He enjoys sensuality, intimacy, and passion. He likes it when you are turned on and give him positive responses. He likes it when he can take things slow and build up the tension until you can't hold back anymore. He enjoys building up the passion and then releasing it in explosive and powerful ways.

Beyond dominance and submission, he also enjoys exploring power dynamics in relationships. He enjoys exploring the many ways in which power dynamics can play out, both in and out of the bedroom.

It should also be said that Jon pre-wall and Jon post-wall are two very different animals: even if it shares a lot of similarities. Jon post-wall is a lot more dominant and confident in himself: if he wants something he asks for it and he lacks the hesitance he once did in his youth. He’s learned the importance of not wasting time and willing yourself to be bold. 

He likes the idea of exploring new and exciting ways to experience pleasure with a partner and finds the dynamic of switching roles to be a major turn-on.

Role-playing is an enjoyable way to explore different dynamics and adds an element of creativity to sexual arousal.

[squeakadeeks]

whew! core lineup for Delta is complete, ft Rhea, Rem, Puck, and Raken.

Delta has an overall dream theme, the main conflict revolving around the Dream Queen trying to put people to sleep forever by giving them perfect, ideal dreams (well intentioned but obviously an issue haha)

Raken, as the nightmare lord, is working to counteract her and maintain balance with the help of his three henchmen, Rhea, Rem and Puck.

in terms of design themes, Rhea is dreams, Rem is nightmares, and Puck is daydreams 🫣

close-ups and more character details below

Rhea was a woman in her mid-20’s living a monotonous life when some point due to her excessive sleeping and lucid dreaming exploration, she falls out of her dream into the dreaming kingdoms. She is first found by Rem, who mistakes her for someone who fell victim to the dream queen, and takes her to Raken to attempt waking her up. Raken tells her about how she fell out of her dream, and that she will not be able to wake back up until she can find her original dream current, which is being occluded by the dream kingdom’s tampering and muddying of the dreaming sea.

Motivated and interested in the dreaming world, she wants to tag along and help Raken both for the feeling of doing the right thing, and to potentially help herself wake up. Although she has somewhat superficial reasons, “this is cool!” “I want to learn cool dream magic too!”, She really genuinely wants to do good and be good, and does want to stop the well intentioned dream queen. But as such struggles with the moral greyness of intentionally giving people nightmares in Raken’s plan. She works very hard to find a “perfect” resolution that convinces the dream queen to stop, addresses the harshness of the waking world, and doesn't involve giving people a worse alternative in the form of horrific nightmares every night. 

Rhea is insanely silvertounged and very good at talking herself out of situations and convincing people to think something/do something. Rhea wants very badly to make everyone happy and have people like her, sometimes to a fault. Rem is her best friend and she is very close to Puck and Raken personally as well outside of being Coworkers™️. Shes optimistic and has an intense, perfectionistic ambitious drive. She doesnt just want to solve the problem, she wants it done as perfectly as possible. Rhea is very skilled with dreaming magic largely from natural talent and unusual creative angles to problems. 

Rem is the next core character. Where Rhea is a well beloved extroverted friend, Rem is the cool, calm, charismatic, competent leader. Raken is by far the closest to Rem of the three, viewing him as a son-like mentee. He’s wicked smart and extremely competent and experienced with dreaming magic due to his diligence and hard work. Rem is the sort of head hech between the three henchmen. At first hes this bombastic, upbeat leader trying to preserve their morale during their fundamentally morally complex and messy task of giving people nightmares to wake them up. He’s someone Rhea and Puck turn to for advice, and he always is the one calling the shots outside of Raken.  He’s also very close with Rhea, being her best friend and working hard to find a way to let her wake up/giving her reasons to wake up again. He’s got a weird, codependent thing going on with Puck that even when everyone was on good terms probably wasnt helping the cause, but at least their respective messiness was contained to each other.

Despite being naturally analytical and intelligent, he is incredibly prone to bad, emotional, impulse decisions, and often jumps to conclusions. He really loves the people close to him but is convinced they dislike him or need more from him constantly which makes things Complicated.

If Rhea has natural talent and charisma, and Rem is diligent and intelligent, Puck is…just sort of there. He’s not especially talented in any one category, nor is he immediately deft from a social perspective. Puck is sort of a loser ngl, hes nowhere nears as talented, skilled, smart, or capable as the others, he just wants his life to be easier but hes constantly stuck in situations that are over his head and he perpetually has to struggle and feel objectively inferior. He really puts the hench in henchmen, he is very infrequently given the opportunity to contribute to plans, hes often just the one that has to carry them out. He was genuinely uncomfortable with the dream queen's plans when employed by the kingdom. He was previously employed as an entertainment clown in the kingdom that no one took seriously which is part of how he was able to overhear the plan, which caused him to leave and join Raken. He has a good heart and strong moral compass and is actually able to see problems far more clearly than Rhea, who gets tunnel vision around perfectionism, and Rem, who gets swayed by his emotions very easily. He is actually very good at getting people to trust and open up to him, and likes making people happy too, just isnt as skilled in it as Rhea. He often gets ignored or taken for granted which he leans into. Sort of a “good things happen to good people, so if bad things happen to me i deserve it” energy.

Raken is the struggling single father trying to wrangle all his henchmen. He is not a bad guy at all, he understands the role he has to play in the dreaming world and takes his responsibility seriously. He loves history and tradition, and values his mantle but does bemoan the inherent suffering he brings. he tries his best to do his job as carefully and conscientiously as possible. He views himself as a mentor figure for his henchmen and tries very hard to help them, but theyre A Lot and he can only do so much. in particular when Rem goes fully off his rocker all he could really do is be like "are you winnin' son"

[prince-liest]

Since Vox is trans in Once Bitten too, I'm a bit curious about one thing: would you say that the way he's currently treating Alastor is close to the way he himself was treated as a "woman" back in the day, by his boss or other men? I have a feeling that one of the reasons he thinks he's not disrespecting Alastor is because on top of having spent ~70 years in Hell already, and being so self-centered, he's intimately familiar with that one specific type of patronization and it reinforces the idea that he couldn't possibly be a perpetrator of that himself if he only has the "best" intentions for Bambi and actually values him and his work (the irony)

2/ Vox (gatekeep, mansplain, manwhore): me? Patronizing? Condescending?? Baby it's cute you think you know what those words mean haha don't frown you're so sexy

PFFT, love that quote. I honestly would attribute Vox's attitude mostly to his shitty personality and the way it's been enabled over the years. His backstory in this verse is exactly the same as it was in 666, and he absolutely did face a lot of the attitude you might imagine someone seen a beautiful woman in his position would face, but he also was a very self-indulgent, go-getting, driven person even in life and occasional shittiness and glass ceiling aside, very much used what he had to get what he wanted.

He absolutely holds patronizing and sexist views despite all of that, and they are definitely sourced from his background, but the greater impact I personally think is from the fact that he came into power as the Media Overlord in a world with no Radio Demon to keep him humbled. The Vees are irreverent as hell (pun intended) even in canon, and that was with them being fundamentally incapable of being top dog. While we don't know how they compare to Carmilla and Zestial in terms of power and influence, I think it's also pretty clear that Carmilla and Zestial don't really have much interest in interfering with them, unlike Alastor, who Valentino mentions Vox has outright fought with.

So: Vox has been running utterly unchecked for decades, supported and enabled both by the other Vees and also his enormous, rabid audience. He's a narcissist who's not prone to seeing other people as people (and this was a problem he had in 666 as well, especially at first), in general and as a whole. His respect and appreciation for others is couched in how he experiences them.

Also, frankly? If you sat him down in a therapist seat, pointed a bright light in his face, and made him answer whether or not he really thought he was being respectful to Alastor in this fic, he would arrive at "no." After all, he does stop himself from doing things he knows would send Alastor running, and while he's pushing the envelope, he's doing so in (relatively) covert ways that he's hoping will get Alastor entrenched and codependent.

But nobody's sitting him down like that, nobody can make him sit down like that, and he doesn't care enough to think past the surface-level justifications he uses for acting on his impulses rather than restraining them.

[myristicisms]

@strifesoldier | Cloud Strife sent;;

' You and me. Your body near mine, close. I'm not right when you're not with me. I get the shakes ' oop zack made him codependent...

Vulnerability, no matter how small or largely given, was always a difficult thing to express; Years of forcing himself into the mold of what Zack thought was the ideal hero only further forcing him to push the overwhelming desire to rely upon someone else to the back of his mind. Being relied upon was the closest he'd ever come to sharing a vulnerable moment with anyone and it was something he cherished far more than even his own life. That much so had never been in the question though, only further proven with each moment where he took a beating to protect those he cared for most, often coming as victorious in each battle he'd carelessly chosen for himself.

Perhaps it was the hubris of a man who has lost damn near everything already or maybe it was just the delusion of someone who had grown lonely over the years, someone who felt as though nobody bothered to know who he was outside of his uniform and rank; At least not until after he'd managed to establish a connection with another person for the first time since... ( Nevermind. ) Zack has come to rely upon being needed, feeling helpful and he's long since found that purpose at the side of his blonde companion. While he'd known that Cloud was capable of taking care of himself well enough, he also couldn't scratch the desperate itch to feel helpful, to do more than just stand beside the other man silently like some brooding shadow.

Though that's what he's become, hasn't he? Bitter and violent should he feel it necessary to be so, a trained killer unafraid of ripping and rending through flesh that managed to be snagged within the maws of an enraged beast, many saw the once proud warrior as nothing more than a monster as of late; A creature that thrived on combat and the destruction of the very people that made him into who he was today, but not Cloud, never Cloud apparently. Lips curl into a gentle grin at the idea, he was helpful to someone at the very least, even if he'd grown all too protective throughout their time beside one another and perhaps he cared far more than the average friend should have, but then again; Average friends don't go through the same horrors as the duo had to endure together. That's how Zack justified it, anyways.

A rabid guard dog trapped in an endless loop of biting despite never wanting to bring harm to those unfortunate to cross into Zack's poor graces, a feature of which was far easier done than said given how low his tolerance for anyone daring to cause problems for either Cloud or himself truly had become. That dependency, as it seems to be, is reciprocated. Though that hardly came as much of a surprise, being without the blonde felt off, something so viscerally incorrect that his very being often trembled with wrath when the two were separated for too long and the verbal confirmation he wasn't the only one to experience that... ( Validating, freeing even. )

“ And here I was, stewing about whether I'm being overbearing towards you. ” He huffs out, amusement glimmering within mako stained eyes; An odd calmness kept Zack completely and uncharacteristically still. At times such as this, he'd often be pacing or doing squats, clears his mind and allows the former SOLDIER to focus on his surroundings but instead he simply sat, jaw twitching while his tongue feels at the sharp canines meant for rending through his foes and that familiar emptiness he'd been so prone to slowly seeps in. “ I'm always here though, always nearby until you tell me to go away and mean it, I promise. ”

[rainbow-starlight]

time for EVEN MORE CHARACTER ANALYSIS 🎉

(this time, with enneagrams!)

So, I love a good personality test, as I know many Tumblr users do. I’m particularly fond of Enneagram, because I feel like it gives a lot more insight into someone compared to, say, MBTI.

So, of course, I sat down and took the test twice: Once for canon Sun, once for canon Moon. A lot (and I do mean a lot) of this is based on speculation, so if you disagree, please let me know why!

I mostly did this because, y’know, there isn’t a lot of characterization for these two, and I wanted to see if I could gain any new knowledge from this. (Which, yep, it absolutely worked.) Hopefully this can be useful for anyone who wants more perspective on writing these two in a more day-to-day sort of setting. It’s almost all speculation, but I found it really interesting.

So, drumroll please… 🥁🥁🥁

Sun is a 2w1, and Moon is a 8w7!

Pretty different from what I found for them online (Sun as a 7w6, Moon as a 1w2). Thoughts on what these mean under the cut.

Most of my information comes from here! Some paraphrasing, some direct quotes. I won’t be directly citing everything because this isn’t an essay.

Sunny

The biggest and most interesting takeaway from Enneagram, to me, is the core hopes and fears.

Sun’s primary hope is to feel loved, and his secondary hope is to be good, have integrity, and be balanced.

Sun’s primary fear is of being unwanted and unworthy of being loved. His secondary fear of being corrupt, evil, or defective.

This is really interesting to think about in the context of the virus. He’s scared of being left behind, maybe doesn’t even understand why Moon is acting the way that he is and is terrified something’s just wrong with them. This could even apply in regards to being moved from the stage to the daycare, in a way.

His main motivations are to express his feelings for others and be needed and appreciated. His secondary motivations are to improve everything and be beyond criticism so nobody can say anything bad about him.

When going through a period of stress, Sun would become more like Moon’s worst traits. He’d be more proud, egocentric, confrontational, aggressive, dominating, vengeful, and demanding of obedience. If he were in danger during this period of time, he’d likely become destructive in his attempts to get out of it, even if that’s not the best way to handle it. He’d also likely become depressed, moody, irrational, hopeless, and ashamed of himself, more prone to self-destruction. He’d probably chase away people who try to help him and self-isolate.

I think that can definitely be seen in the ruin part of HW2 with Sun’s voice lines to the player, as well as how harsh he is on the player during arts & crafts.

When going through a period of growth, Sun would be creative, self-aware, introspective, gentle, compassionate, excitable, spontaneous, cheerful, and productive. He’d be able to be vulnerable yet emotionally strong, grateful for what he has, and excited about just existing. Very much like fanon Sun, honestly.

An unhealthy Sun would likely be manipulative, inflexible, self-serving, and domineering, able to excuse and rationalize his behavior because he sees himself as a victim. He’d likely be obsessive about others’ imperfections and wrongdoings, perhaps to the point of cruelty. He’d be prone to nervous breakdowns.

An average Sun (closest to what we’ve seen so far) would be people-pleasing, orderly, abrasive, overbearing, impatient, self-sacrificial, and codependent. Full of approval and flattery for others. He’d likely hover and mettle in others’ business and scold others for anything done not to his exact specifications.

A healthy Sun (unheard of so far in the games lmao) would be unselfish, compassionate, caring, hopeful, warm-hearted, forgiving, encouraging, and appreciative. He’d actually take care of himself, too.

To help Sun grow into that healthy category, here’s some stuff that would help…

Addressing his own needs before others’.

Not expecting appreciation for the good things he does.

Asking people what they need from him instead of just assuming and trying to help, and accepting that sometimes people don’t want his help without assuming that they dislike him or are rejecting him.

Not trying to call attention to his own hard work.

Learning to recognize the affection and good wishes of others, even if those things take a different shape than he’s familiar with.

Learning to relax and take time for himself, without feeling like this will lead to chaos and disaster.

Not expecting others to change immediately when he explains something, because what’s obvious to him isn’t always obvious to others and people just don’t typically change right away.

Not getting worked up about others’ (or his own) shortcomings, because frustrated with others gets him nowhere and harsh self-criticism just makes him feel worse.

Getting in touch with his own feelings and needs.

Moon

Now, this one was definitely harder. We get so little characterization for him. And yet…

Moon’s primary hope is to protect himself and be in control of his own life and destiny. His secondary hope is to be satisfied and content, and have his needs fulfilled.

Moon’s primary fear is of being harmed or controlled by others, and his secondary fear is of being deprived and in pain.

This is really telling compared to Sun’s. Moon isn’t scared of some sort of fundamental flaw within himself. He also cares much less about what others think of him, and just wants to be happy and safe.

His main motivations are self-reliance, to prove his strength, and to be important and in control of his environment and situation. His secondary motivations are to maintain his freedom and happiness, to avoid missing out, to keep himself excited and occupied, and to avoid pain.

I feel like this definitely tracks. He’s a gremlin that makes a hobby out of bothering the staff by pretending to be a boogeyman. That’s not “security” work (sorry, Moon).

When going through a period of stress, Moon becomes secretive, fearful, perfectionistic, and critical. He’d be reclusive and out of touch with reality, obsessed with yet frightened by his violent thoughts, and incredibly self-destructive. He’d judge others harshly while rationalizing his own actions and wouldn’t hesitate to punish others to get rid of perceived ‘wrongdoers’.

This aligns pretty well with what we’ve seen of Moon with the virus.

When going through a period of growth, Moon picks up some of Sun’s best traits. He becomes open-hearted, caring, focused, compassionate, encouraging, nurturing, loving, perceptive, curious, independent, innovative, and whimsical.

We haven’t really had a chance to see anything like this with Moon, but it feels closer to popular fanon perceptions as well.

An unhealthy Moon would be ruthless and violent. He’d be reckless about his own safety and straight-up murderous. He’d be impulsive and never know when to stop or when he’s taking things too far, and eventually run out of energy or get too broken-down and just give up on himself.

An average Moon would be self-sufficient, hardworking, hyperactive, self-centered, and proud. He wouldn’t pay much attention to his own emotional needs. He’d be combative and intimidating to get his way, and not shy away from threats to get obedience. He’d always be doing things to avoid boredom and have a larger-than-life persona just for the fun of it.

A healthy Moon (at long last…) would be brave, confident, resourceful, decisive, cheerful, passionate, and assertive. He’d actually be very extroverted and easily excited, which goes against a lot of popular headcanons for him, but then again this is the guy whose entire characterization is one long performance of hide-and-seek/tag with the monster under your bed. I feel like it makes sense that he’d be more social when the threat of his worst fears coming true isn’t looming over his head.

How would Moon reach that healthy category?

Recognizing that he’s at his best when he does things like take charge or help people through a crisis. He needs to use some self-restraint and try to inspire others to do what he wants instead of just forcing them.

Learning to let others have their way sometimes, and recognizing that doing this usually won’t mean sacrificing his power or his real needs.

Recognizing that the world is not against him and letting in the affection that’s available.

Accepting that he depends on others and not alienating them.

Not overvaluing being feared/obeyed, and recognizing that those things are not a stand-in for love.

Learning to be less impulsive.

Learning to listen to others, as well as learning to be comfortable without constant stimulation.

Accepting that he doesn’t have to have everything immediately.

Choosing quality over quantity in experiences.

Making sure that what he wants will really be good for him in the long run.

What do these types mean for their relationship and how they’d interact with each other?

They’re more alike than they initially appear!

Both are action-oriented and want to have a personal impact on their environment.

Both can be sentimental and deeply feeling, with a soft side that isn’t as apparent.

Both can play the roles of provider, protector, caretaker, and nurturer while avoiding or even denying their own needs.

Both tend to overwork themselves and be the ‘strong one’ in relationships, although Sun’s type is more likely to be the power behind the throne whereas Moon’s type is more likely to be the one on the throne, which I found really interesting.

Both are passionate, generous, and have good people skills.

Both are strong-willed and like taking on responsibility, as long as they choose it themselves.

Both easily play the roles that the other needs and wants. They see each other’s best qualities and can be the other’s strongest supporter and admirer. They also have clearly-defined roles, so they tend to not get in each other’s way. They make powerful allies who complement each other’s strengths, particularly the good effects they have on others.

However, they have very different values: Sun’s type is more person-oriented, and Moon’s type is more practical. Sun’s type also tends to be more indirect, whereas Moon’s type tends to be more direct. Sun’s type is much more likely to get attached to people and see things from their point of view, whereas Moon’s type does not.

When they’re not doing so good, they may be prone to arguments over whose views are correct: Moon’s confrontational attitude and tendency to shut others out, or Sun’s possessive and self-sacrificial behaviors. Sun’s type is more likely to get caught in a codependent relationship with Moon’s, becoming an apologist and enabler for his bad behavior.

The breakdown in mutual communication/respect/trust would involve Moon seeing Sun as insincere and manipulative, and Sun seeing Moon as cruel and domineering. They’d both become more controlling and harsh with each other, both prone to paranoia and fear of betrayal.

I feel like that’s kind of where we’re at in the games. Sun chooses not to outright warn people about Moon a lot of the time, and they both try to gain total control of their shared body and shut the other out.

AAAAND… DONE!

I hope this was at least an interesting read for you guys, and offered a new perspective on these characters! I recommend checking out the link for further insights into the personality types, because I tried to just limit it to character motivations and interactions and that alone has been ridiculously long.

hey, sunnie, why’d you do this?

neurodivergency. next question.

[thewayuarent]

SandRay, codependency and addiction

We can't say for sure what’s gonna happen to Ray and Sand, but I can almost physically feel how their relationship will develop into codependency.

For Ray this is understandable: people with one addiction are much more subject to others, and dependence on an individual is one of them. This is quite a common tendency in behavior, often unconscious, when a person using addiction as a coping mechanism falls into a relationships. Relationships of any kind - family, friendly, romantic, sexual - the main thing is not the nature of the relationship, the main thing is their presence. Ray, due to his addiction, is prone to compulsions, which is why it takes him so little time to fixate on Sand.

The fact that he is obviously lonely - and his loneliness is one of the reasons for his alcoholism - also has a huge impact and only aggravates the situation. But even without this, the fact that Sand is voluntarily on his "broken" side, he is ready to take care of him, sympathize with him and devote time to him is a jackpot.

When Sand offers him friendship, Ray immediately says that it is necessary to keep an eye on him on a permanent basis. And part of it looks like self-irony, but at the same time it's literally what he needs. He has found someone who replaces his need to forget himself in alcohol. In fact, he replaces alcohol with Sand, replaces one addiction with another. He’s still drinking of course but with every interaction with Sand he’s doing it less.

Sand on the other hand has what I call savior syndrome. First time he helps Ray because he is, well, a normal person with a certain level of social responsibility. Then he agrees to hang out with him for money. But then? Many people reads in his actions that he is already falling for Ray, but I doubt it very much. I see it as a mix of pity and being sorry for him. And that what makes him stay in the first place.

And it's a pretty safe combination in itself, but in the context of their relationship, it can become very complicated very fast. He’s saying it himself - sex is fine but you should be careful, don’t feel more (and oh they will). The more they become attached to each other, the more they will depend on their roles and the emotions that these roles offer them. And Sand, as a self-aware person, understands this perfectly. But he is also attracted to it. And it's not about "saving" Ray. But there is something about the fact that a person you barely know sees you as a solution. So exhausting, but so very attractive. Savior syndrome.

And at the same time, of all the main couples in the show at the moment, they are the only ones who are equal. Yes, Ray uses money for control, but Sand is well aware of this. They do not lie and don’t try to manipulate each other, they talk through aspects of their relationship and generally find them mutually beneficial. So yes, they are far from an example of a healthy relationship, but at least so far they are not completely fucked up.

It’s too early in the show to tell what happened later and how their situation will develop. But I am so interested in it. As someone who went through relationship with addicted person I am well aware about codependency and other issues. I am also know for a fact that in healthy communication, with self-awareness of both partners and support that type of relationship can work.

Do I believe that last part will be about Sand and Ray? Not really. At least not in a “fairy tale happy end” way. But Only Friens is a strong, difficult and beautiful story about people. If they choose to show struggles of addiction and how it can affect others I’m all here for it.

Will Ray fight it or choose to ignore it, will Sand be here for him or decide that it's not for him. Or maybe nothing about that and I just see personal stuff. Either way it would be interesting

[strayheartless]

The thing about Vanipliku is, I don't hate it. I just don't ship it in the same way I ship Soriku.

The difference (for me) between the two is that while Soriku may not always do the healthy thing when it comes to eachother, They always have the others best interests at heart and its obvious that they are willing to work at a healthy relationship.

Vanipliku by comparison are like Anti-Soriku. not in the sense that they are evil Sora and Riku, but in the sense that they do not have the same intentions towards eachother as the hero's of light have. Repliku, to a certain extent is Riku at his most vulnrable and manipulated, but also at his most angry. He is Riku at his most likely to lash out at Sora. Even if he is no longer the same as Riku, he is still a snapshot in time of an angry child who (if we follow Sorkiu Fanon rather than Canon) is still upset that he is pining over his best friend.

Vanitas isn't Sora, hes not even Ventus. He looks like Sora, he almost sounds like Sora, but he's not Sora. There is no part of him that thinks or acts of cares like Sora does. He was the "piece of Ventus that was taken away" while Sora was the "piece ventus needed to be whole" but they are different pieces of a bigger whole. Vanitas is negativity, he has been manipulated and abused his entire exsistance and if you read the Kingdom hearts character files you find out his exsistance is just pain and bitterness. he is literally the antithisis of light. Does this make his inherently evil? no, but it does make him more prone to self distructive behaviour.

I will be the first to say Vanitas' Villan credentials are of the same ilk as someone like Sephiroths, but like Sephiroth he is a product of what other people make him. He is obsessive and cruel, he loves the same way he hurts and that doesn't breed healthy relationships.

To me Vanipliku is one of those relationships like SephGen or Sephikura or AkuSai. it has great potential to be a toxic yet completely codependent relationship. the kind of relationship that you know you shouldn't be in because its doing you damage but you won't leave because who else loves you in that way that makes you feel powerful, makes your skin crawl with need?

So with that in mind I often read Vanipliku like this:

Repliku is with Vanitas because its the closest thing he can get to Sora. Van looks like Sora, he sounds like Sora, but Van is fucked up enough to go along with the darkest of Repliku's idea's. If Repliku asked, Vanitas would grab his hand and let himself be pulled into the darkness. But Repliku doesn't neccesserally love Vanitas' darkness.

Vanitas wants to be loved. He doesn't care how, and he doesn't care why, he just wants to feel as if he is. He doesn't know what love feels like, so When Repliku is willing to kiss him, willing to hang off of him and be possessive of him, Vanitas accepts that, revels in it even.

The fact that what they are doing is not love its obsession, its toxic codependency, doesn't even register. They both feed of of each others darkness.

Niether of them want to be alone and regardless of the fact that Repliku makes Vanitas feel rage like nothing else when he compares him to the hero of light, or barates him for his own personality, doesn't matter. The fact that Vanitas will torture and emotionally humiliate Repliku in return doesn't matter. because in the end what they have isn't love, but it sure feels like it to them.

The posessivness spills out into letting the other be touched by others. Repliku is extremely jelous and will hurt people and Vantias if he percieves even the slightest chance of betrayal.

Vanitas craves the pain, and the feeling of being owned and wanted. He's less jelous of insignificant others, but he would truely love to torture Sora until Repliku sees how weak the boy is. Until he realises Vanitas is the better option.

I dunno man, if you see them as loving and healthy, I'm not about to say you are wrong. You ship what you ship and I think thats great. this is just how I have always interpreted this paticualr ship!

[weirdlynotspecific]

Studying Hunter from TOH as a person with PTSD

So as you probably gathered this post is going to be a bit heavy. Tw for: narcissists, PTSD, abuse, Belos being Belos, trauma and it's after effects

Also bare in mind that this is just my opinion. I have PTSD caused by someone similar to Belos and noticed a lot of similarities between Hunter and I. However, I am by no means an authority on this topic and this is just my take on the character.

I will probably come back to this and edit it to add more if I think of anything else.

Also spoilers for The Owl House up until Season 3 Episode 1, Thanks to Them.

Hunter's unwillingness to believe Belos is a bad person

This is something many people with PTSD (especially if the person/people causing the trauma is a narcissist) go through when other people realize something is off.

It can look like denial, grief, anger, and the person being abused can be furious with the person who realized something was wrong.

It's really confusing like in Hunter's case when Belos has been put on a pedestal (literally) his entire life

Belos gave Hunter a purpose. This is love bombing. This can appear as: "Wow you're so special" "I love you so so much". Belos straight up tells Hunter: "You're destined for something" (Hunter brings it up in Hollow Mind I think) and makes him the golden guard. It's a common tactic with manipulators so that their victim has a reason to stay with them.

Belos also isolated him. Hunter never knew what a good caregiver looked like. He wouldn't know what abuse looks like because all of this has been normalized. He wasn't even allowed to leave the castle except on missions on the weekends (I believe that's in season 3 episode 1).

Hunter's signs

Hunter's shaking hands seen in Hollow Mind. This can be an underlying physical disorder but in Hunter's case it's most likely because he is in fight or flight and processing a lot of information at once. The mind can take stress out physically on the body and this is one way this can appear.

Hunter's hypervigilance. Hunter is very easily spooked (once again Hollow Mind this episode is just full of Hunter and Belos making it my best point of reference) and is constantly on edge. Even in the newest episode (S3 E1) he is on edge, although in this case he was right.

Hunter's eyebags. So I think this could be one of 2 things; stress appearing physically on the body again, or more likely a lack of sleep. many with PTSD sleep less, have trouble staying asleep, avoid sleep, and are more prone to nightmares.

Cutting his hair when he thought he looked too much like Belos. This scene hit hard for me because I also changed my hair because of my trauma. It's an example of taking control of what you can, which many abuse victims do when they have a space to. It's also avoidance, Hunter doing what he can to be the furthest thing from Belos. it's a scene that even if it's a little detail, it's extremely important to his character.

Not telling his friends he's a grimwalker. Abuse victims don't want to feel alone. In this case when Hunter is in Fight or Flight he chooses another option, Fawn. It's a people-pleasing method to make sure the victim doesn't get hurt again. It can also result in codependency. Hunter is very careful of what he says to his friends because he doesn't want to be left alone and feel that again.

Causes

Physical injury. Hunter has a scar (now several) on his face. Unwanted permanent change to the body ESPECIALLY through force is never healthy and can be extremely traumatic.

Psychological abuse. Belos is a known liar, it's stated over and over again in the series. Living in a relationship like that is breeding grounds for trauma because you can never be sure if what you are hearing is the truth or not. When Hunter finds out he's a grimwalker that is his entire life flipped over. His life, his identity, was made up by Belos. He is now forced to figure out what is actually his and what was made up.

Sources

https://www.dailyom.com/journal/is-it-love-or-is-it-love-bombing-5-red-flags-to-help-you-spot-the-difference/?aff=91&ad=1&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=PerformanceMax&acct=9358138875&campaign_id=16896613381&gclid=CjwKCAiA5Y6eBhAbEiwA_2ZWIdNpOVzzurt7m4MaXkLRwaaejex6WBv4MaCcMSXZMJrbiVJRj7VVHRoCijQQAvD_BwE

https://atlanticcoastrehab.blog/why-your-hands-tremble

https://www.ptsd.va.gov/understand/related/sleep_problems.asp#:~:text=Loss%20of%20sleep%20time.,loss%20can%20affect%20daily%20life.

https://www.modernintimacy.com/fawn-response-trauma-response-reason-for-people-pleasing-behavior/#:~:text=Fawning%20is%20also%20sometimes%20associated,they%20think%20they%20need%20you.

[ventiswampwater]

vincent!!! and rz! mike myers, jason voorhees!! ( if you want !!! )

AAAAAAAA what a line-up!!!

regrettably tho, I never made it thru the entirety of rz's halloween 💀 I got about halfway in and then got distracted by smthn else hfdjhdfjshjdfsh 🤡 and UNFORTUNATELY..................jason's too much of my babylittleguydude for me to conceptualize smoochin him???? I tried and. he's too baby. hdfsjhjdfshjfdsh but I did TRY

so, like a basic ass bitch, I just wrote stuff for vinny. 😔 tysm for the ask tho aaaaaaaaa MWAH MWAH 💖

feel free to send me a character of ur choice for headcanons and I’ll give u 3 pros and 3 cons of dating them. if ur so inclined!!!!

vincent

3 PROS

the calm of being able to exist in silence w/someone else. discovering a way to speak a language without words. finding a reprieve from the constant chaos in quiet moments where u can just.....BE. w/no pretense. sharing late night meals in the kitchen. taking naps in his subterranean lair while he sculpts for hours.

he gives me BIG body worship vibes. he's an artist and he's definitely thinking massive big brain thoughts about the curve of ur boob and comparing it to a hieronymus bosch painting. where tf did that connection come from?? well, come on the twenty-year odyssey voyage of his thought process and maybe u will figure out!! probably not, tho!! he's just a ponderous ass mfer. curious about every inch of u. v slow and methodical. all about taking his time and learning what makes u tick. this is for art!!!!

if artistic devotion and tributes get u goin, he's v much the Guy. get ready 2 be incorporated in all his pieces. u start finding lovingly detailed charcoal sketches of u on ur nightstand. he shows u a new oil painting and there are ur eyes, starin back @ u. meticulously crafted miniatures of u on the kitchen windowsill. granted, ur usually merged with a spider. or a serpent of some kind. and it's honestly pretty creepy. but the detail is really somethin.

3 CONS

SUPER weird codependent relationship. just like bo, I feel like he's absolutely searching for mama. perhaps even more so? bc I just feel that it's likely that he was sequestered inside for most of his youth. I can't see trudy enrolling him in school/letting him interact with a lot of people. he was her favorite of the twins and I'm sure she wanted to cultivate a relationship where he was entirely dependent on her. it would serve double purposes for her: being needed and adored unequivocally.......while also driving a wedge between the twins themselves. that one line in the og script where carly tells bo that he's talentless (LMAO) and that his mother hated him bc he stole her favorite's face. yep. YEAH.

a partner is more of a muse/concept than a person. v much a mirror of bo's weirdness, but in a less obvious way. due to what's bound to be TONS of one-sided communication, he's definitely prone to build up an idea of what kind of person u are. rather than really understanding u. the technicalities of who u are don't really matter bc he views u through a lens of a source of inspiration, something to be molded into his art, something ABSTRACT.

he's unpredictable. his violence is a LOT more unknowable......and significantly more difficult to comprehend than bo's violence. IMO! all of his kills are brutal and almost clinical. he grew up surrounded by medical textbooks and his childhood paintings are surreal and contort the human form into weird shapes. I v much feel like the anatomy of a body and how it is pieced together/could be taken apart is more important to him than.........idk........the fact that that body is inhabited by somebody. yikes!!! I think you'd v much be walkin on eggshells w/him. bc how do u know when the inspiration might run dry. and ur function will have to change. YIKES.

[anarchosimdicalist]

URSULA ALLEN’S BACHELOR CHALLENGE

I’m doing the bachelor challenge thing! I thought a BC with all elders would be kinda fun and cute so that’s what I’m doing. I've kinda written myself into a corner of doing a BC with someone who would absolutely hate being on The Bachelor or anything like it, so I'm doing away with the TV premise. While Sage is kind of a presenter here, his segments aren't necessarily diegetic. As such, don't think of your contestants as people applying to be on a show.

RULES

Applicants must be elders

All genders welcome

Occults welcome (but I’m not counting a 100+ year old YA vampire as an elder, as much as I like that one What We Do In The Shadows bit)

Tragic backstories welcome, silly goofy backstories also welcome, no backstories also also welcome.

CC welcome but maxis match preferred, and no script mods (eg mod traits). I have all packs except Batuu.

At least 1 negative trait preferred.

1 applicant per person (subject to change depending on turnout)

Tag ‘#ursulaallenbc’ and @anarchosimdicalist in your contestant posts - if I don't reblog it within a day or so feel free to send an ask or DM.

Deadline: 10th August (also subject to change depending on turnout)

More about Ursula and Sage under the cut!

URSULA ALLEN

AGE: 72 PRONOUNS: She/her SEXUALITY: Bisexual CAREER: Author TRAITS: Gloomy, Perfectionist, Bookworm ASPIRATION: Bestselling Author

Though she has been writing since she was a child and published semi-regularly since the 80s, it was her middle-grade fantasy Tower series that got her properly famous in the late 90s.

Since then, she’s had a child, been divorced, publicly came out as bisexual, published upwards of 60 books for children and a good few for adults, built a legacy as the favourite author to a generation of kids, and amassed a modest fortune.

While she's happy to have the kind of security that her money provides, she doesn't like having a lot of stuff. Her house is pretty minimalist, her clothes are high-quality but she doesn't have many, and she only really splashes out on fancy food. A good chunk of her money goes to charity.

She has what she refers to as "artistic melancholy" and what her son quite easily identifies as "depression".

She comes off as kind of gruff and grumpy, but if you're willing to see past it she can be quite warm. She loves to complain and she doesn't suffer fools gladly but she's also very wise and prone to philosophising.

She's very passionate about what she does. She has no intention of retiring any time soon, though she could afford it. She wouldn't really know what to do with herself if she ever stopped writing.

Always been good with kids, though she only ever had one.

SAGE HAMMOND

AGE: 24 PRONOUNS: He/him SEXUALITY: Gay CAREER: ???? TRAITS: Childish, Lazy, Cheerful ASPIRATION: Joke Star

Very close with Ursula. She made up stories for him as a kid, supported him through his transition as a teenager, and now as an adult they're kind of a single unit. A little codependent but generally healthy.

Has an English degree, somewhat inspired by Ursula though he's not really interested in becoming a writer.

Has lived with Ursula since graduating. Feels like he should move out but he doesn't really know what to do with his life and can't find a job.

Flamboyant silly guy. Colourful aesthetic constantly threatens to intrude on Ursula's big minimalist house.

[mental-illness-bingo]

You cannot convince me that Devils Don't Fly (Natalia Kills) isn't about someone with ASPD singing to someone with BPD

Written by someone with (now profdx) ASPD who's with someone with BPD

Edit: Now officially written by someone with diagnosed ASPD

I threw myself a party, Chardonnay and Oxy...

I stopped the screams inside my head...

They say it's not the answer, but I can't carry on

People with ASPD are known to turn to substance abuse, especially in times of high stress, due to an inability to destress properly. We also are known to abuse substances in social situations to appear normal and feel less uncomfortable around others, and to deal with traumatic flashbacks. People warn us it's unsafe, but our brain cannot properly process risk, and sees itself as either invincible, or else ignores the risk due to the "reward" of the high/drunk feeling.

I remember when you had me

Floating high like Sid and Nancy

Sid and Nancy were an iconic couple who are known for the intensity of their relationship as they plunged into excess, substance abuse, etc. Someone with ASPD being with someone with BPD can be very similar to this feeling - sometimes because of doing exactly this since both disorders include an increased risk of substance abuse - but also because being a favorite person is basically getting all the care, love, and attention the person with ASPD never got before. This itself can feel like a high, and may be the only time that the person with ASPD feels secure and safe, and the person with BPD may also feel this "high" because for once the intensity of their attachment doesn't scare the other person away. Instead their codependent behaviors click neatly together - the need to give and get excessive attention, as well as the intensity of BPD emotions being much easier for someone with ASPD to sense.

However, Sid eventually stabbed Nancy to death (allegedly), which is very much what a BPD split feels like to the person with ASPD. This turn against us, so sudden and harsh, is a betrayal that is as bad as stabbing us if not worse. It's often twice as bad as the reactions we're used to getting from people, and it's coming from someone who was filling a carnal need for love and attachment from childhood emotional neglect - someone we let in and became vulnerable around. You could also see ASPD as the Sid of the situation, since ASPD detachment and anger attacks the thing BPD desperately tries to avoid - abandonment - and many ASPD symptoms can include behaviors BPD sees as abandoment. People with ASPD are also prone to violent outbursts, especially in the face of anger/betrayal/jealousy/perceived slights/etc.

(Upon researching Sid and Nancy, I firmly believe she stabbed herself. However, this line is obviously written under the popular assumption that Sid killed her)

By god, we almost had it all

If both people manage themselves carefully, as mentioned above, the symptoms fit together quite nicely. People with BPD often enjoy spending as much time together as physically possible, whilst people with ASPD tend to prefer to spend the majority of their time with the few (if any) people they designate as safe. People with BPD tend to be excessively attached, loving, and attentive, all things that people with ASPD were denied in the years leading to their development of ASPD. People with BPD tend to get very irrationally jealous and upset when their partner is close or friendly with other people, due to fear of being abandoned for someone "better", while people with ASPD are often cold or even abrasive to almost everyone with the exception of the people they choose to let in if they let in anyone at all. People with BPD, due to their splits, tend to be more understanding of ASPD's tendency to irrational anger responses and forgive harsh reactions more easily if made to feel secure the rest of the time and people with ASPD can easily detach during the periods where they're being split on and thus can recover easier from being pushed away, and aren't likely to run to someone else because of their distaste to the majority of people, which helps people with BPD feel more secure and split less.

TL;DR when it's going well, relationships between those with ASPD and BPD can give both people exactly what they need most while creating a safe environment for symptoms to come out, and while avoiding the common pitfalls people with the disorders experience in relationships with NT people/different disorder combinations.

But I've got chains

Chains meaning decreased empathy, muted positive emotions, intense anger, and detachment from other people due to that disconnected feeling.

And you've got wings

Wings meaning heightened empathy/emotions and intense attachment to people; wings = the opposite of the "chains" of ASPD.

...Devils don't fly, but I try

The stigma attached to ASPD causes us to be seen as demonic or devils - trying to look "normal", but failing because you can't fake normal 24/7 in a relationship.

And if that's too much of a stretch

When everyone that holds my hand gets cut from all the thorns?

Very few people can handle meaningful relationships with someone with ASPD due to the symptoms, if we even let them get close enough to know us. We push people away sometimes to avoid getting attached since the hurt and anger of a breakup is overwhelming and we often perceive ourself as being ok or happy without any other people in our life.

I used to put my ear against the wall

To hear the screams, to hear the fall

More reasons to escape it all

ASPD has a trauma/environmental component, and obviously fighting/domestic abuse between parents would count as traumatic and take focus, attention, and care away from a child who needs those things.

It's not cuz I'm young, or from a broken home

More of the above and ASPD symptoms are often blamed on age ("young people don't care about anyone but themselves") and can't be diagnosed under 18 because so many symptoms are considered normal teenage behavior.

Maybe I just fight because I don't know where I belong

People with ASPD experienced amplified anger, frustration, jealousy, boredom, etc which can lead to excessive/escalated arguments. Also pushing people away by fighting helps keep us isolated, which eases the pain of feeling so different from others around us.

Angels were never meant to fall,

And you're the loveliest of them all.

If I thought God could fix this, I'd pray for your forgiveness

People with BPD seem like the total opposite of ASPD, experiencing the opposite extremes of emotion. For someone with ASPD always called demonic/spawn of satan/etc, that opposite would be an angel or god. Being with someone with BPD while having ASPD feels like we're dragging them down with us, since our symptoms flare the more "negative" BPD symptoms such as splitting, detachment, etc which makes them act similar to us.

But I've been cast down, thrown out when I crossed to the other side

Because of the environmental factor of ASPD, we usually don't have it/exhibit symptoms internally or externally, until after years of being normal kids (if not extremely caring, sensitive kids trying to get attention and care that we're lacking). This means most people with ASPD have some sort of range of time they consider the point where they "turned", "gave up", etc. which is the time where we become social outcasts or get heavily bullied which is when we often first begin to isolate. This point can easily be seen as "crossing over", and is the end of us fitting in normally in society/school/etc.

[friendship-switchblades]

for end-of-year asks: 14 + 20?

HEY STZERO!! :)

14. Favorite book you read this year? I'm SO glad someone asked me this one! Geoff Rickly's Someone Who Isn't Me was fantastic, and held the crown for most of the year. Having just gotten back into reading regularly, I was mostly plowing through fun sci-fi novellas and mid nonfiction (perhaps, all nonfiction is simply mid at best). SWIM was the first that stood out as a work that had goals beyond entertainment - and succeeded. Prose, structure, the unflinching honesty of "I think this is a good basis for a novel but fuck it, let's punch it up." Geoff has always deserved more than just being "the guy who gave MCR their first break" and I'm so happy for him!

Idlewild by James Frankie Thomas is dead-heat-tied for favorite of the year. Calling it a "psychological thriller" evokes superhuman serial killers and action setpieces, but I truly have no other way of describing it. A moment in time (NYC post-9/11; teenhood of the early 00s) captured in the obsessive, codependent romantic-friendship of queer teen weirdos. I couldn't put it down. Watching Nell and Fay's all-consuming relationship jump the rails and witnessing their shared plural perspective split into their separate, singular narrative chapters felt like being flayed open.

(If only they were a few years younger, and had been teens when The Black Parade came out. That would have fixed nothing but I like to think those fanfic-writing theater kids would've loved the album.)

20. What’s something you learned this year? HM this is a good one. I answered the above right away, but needed to reflect on this since receiving the ask.

I think I'm a person prone to inertia, I don't naturally assume the role of initiating. And this year I spent a lot of time stepping out of that predilection. It's not like I was ever happy not doing anything, just that I couldn't conceive of the steps and the consistency in pursuing them.

This year I confronted that a lot, both personally and professionally. I got multiple tattoos (so much emailing), I planned TWO birthday parties for myself (regular winter bday and then forced everyone to go to the beach for my half birthday), I booked a short trip by myself! Not to mention all of the time I got to spend with friends just because I stopped being such a passenger princess. This was all shit I've always wanted to do that's never happened as much before!

I also had to do all this shit professionally, too, but that's way less fun and heartwarming lol. But hey I art directed an entire [redacted] and posters I designed were plastered all over NYC, which fuckin ruled.

[not-this-guy]

Once again, picking at your brain for your thoughts

What’re your reasons/ideas behind your top hc’s for Bro

i'm brain dead right now after a full shift so let me give you the long short list and a more general explanation of my general fascination with this guy

the basis of my takes and hcs on bro stem from approaching him and viewing him as a person who is flawed and wrong and misguided, but a person and not a generic one faced boogeyman. he is an abuser, he has a lack of boundaries and he has violent tendencies, but i don't look at it in a vacuum because unlike dave who's only ever seen what bro allowed him to see, we can look at him as a whole.

i picked him up a couple years ago in a group roleplay server, mainly as a "i don't trust anyone else to write him/haha wouldn't it be funny if" and since then he's been living rent free in my head - but he's out grown what canon gave us.

and the fundamentals of that are:

0 | SPITE, DISGUST AND FRUSTRATION: he is a fascinating character in his own right, but goddamn is he polarising and one prone to settle in the extremes of fandom perception to the point that people have to fucking tag him as a trigger warning nowadays, which makes people unwilling to interact and engage in more nuanced discussions of him out of avoidance of being harassed which is understandable. however this kind of left him as a character to the wolves, and now a lot of his more recent works and his entire tag in general in whatever site you use has been trashed by incestuous pedophiles - which makes people even less wiling to interact with the concepts brought up in his character. and honestly fuck that. i'm willing to endure dealing w their bullshit directly n i'm willing to call these people what they are (groomers sharing csa material for personal gratification and desensitisation) and i'm not giving them free reign of bro's tag anymore. these freaks should be rightfully shunned and mocked and judged where ever they go because they're too deep in self-denial to ever change.

I | EXTRAPOLATION: with alpha dirk's introduction we were left with a question, how could this kid end up like his beta session self? what could possibly drive the dirk we grow to like and see multiple facets of become this shell of a man? and boy do i love assuming and explaining shit away for people who are barely characters in their own right. free reign to do whatever i want baby.

II | BRAIN DAMAGE: the answer to that question is to chip away at the soul and to scramble a man's sense of reality. i haven't really been in the headspace for it but id love to one day fully explore the horrors of Bro and Lil Cal's codependency for those 30 some years. with that as a base (but not an excuse) i started to slowly piece him back together, and working with the 'undesirables' of mental illness. he is an unmedicafed paranoid schizophrenic with hoarding tendencies who was diagnosed with aspergers as a child... and then punished for it, being effectively abandoned by the system to fates whims and blamed for never having his needs met. his one solid connection at any point in time was lil cal. but instead of villanizing him for having these traits... i see him as someone who was trying to help, but was misguided by his closest confidant and blinded by his over controlling paranoid nature and compulsory need to one up people. everything bro did, he did to help dave... he just never stopped to think about if he was going about it the right way, because he saw dave as an extension of himself and thus of course thought his behaviour was appropriate, because he is acting as who he wished he had when he himself was a kid.

III | PROJECTING AND RELATABILITY: damn he just like me fr. aka on top of all of that, i've grown to attach some of my own traits onto him and vice versa as a means of coping with my own backstory and as a backwards way of acknowledging that my feelings are valid... by allowing bro strider of all people to also go through them and changing myself to have compassion for him.

there's more but look i forgot and m done eating my cold burger.

[the-irken-pony]

That post from the other day about thsc character age headcanons got me wondering why it is that I headcanon Reginald and RHM as young as I do (age 26 and 29-30, respectively) and I think I’ve got somewhat of a grasp on why it is.

Reginald, to me, reads less as someone who’s older and matured and more as someone who’s younger but stuck in a position where he’s not exactly allowed to act young, if that makes sense? I’ve got a couple reasons for this.

Reginald was the person who overthrew and replaced Terrence Suave, stated in one of his bios to be one of the worst leaders in Toppat Clan history. To be in such a position would put on a lot of pressure to be Not That Guy. This sort of mindset would likely lead Reginald to mask and act mature in order to garner approval from the other Toppats.

I don’t doubt that Reginald would’ve been able to overthrow Terrence as a young adult, given how nonchalant the Toppat Clan is with letting just about anyone take over leadership. They even appointed Ellie Rose as leader, when she only just showed up and when the only reason she showed up at all was just to confront Henry with his behavior.

Reginald seems to be a well composed person who can stay calm even in an emergency......... unless his Right Hand Man isn’t available. If he had several years of leadership under his belt, then there would be at least a few instances of him and RHM being separated, so he would need to be prepared in such situations. Instead, he’s very quick to start panicking the second his Right Hand Man is MIA (such as in RPE/RBH, TK, or SSR), suggesting some level of under-preparation or even codependency on Reginald’s part.

Reginald is also more prone to making impulsive decisions that indirectly harm the Toppat Clan when he’s in such a panic state. Not only does he hand over the Toppat Clan to an intruder upon being captured, but he’s quick to fire a giant death laser at Henry for stealing the Norwegian Emerald, and his jealousy lead him to kill Henry when he knows full well that cybernetic revival is a possibility. With how poorly he seems to handle not having his Right Hand Man available, it would surprise me for him to have not run into issues sooner if he were a longer running leader, given the above.

When he’s not separated from his Right Hand Man, he often swings to the opposite extreme, going so far as being nonchalant when faced with an intruder (in SSR and JB, for example, and to a lesser extent in PP/TR), essentially not taking the situation seriously until it reaches the point of being Urgent.

He knows how to competently have discussions about work. Outside of work... ehhhh? Not so much lol.

He's the only person to refer to the Orbital Station's giga laser by name, suggesting he was the one who named it. What did he decide to call it? Supreme Dominance, that's what he called it. I rest my case.

As for RHM, my reasoning is more of a comparison to Reginald.

I see him being in a similar age range as Reginald, partly for copperright reasons, and partly because they have similar enough maturity levels that it's hard for me to see them having drastically different ages.

He’s more likely to stay calm during emergencies, but still treats them as serious issues, which makes me think he's a little bit older than Reginald. Or, if not older, more stable.

At the same time, he's impulsive like Reginald but less conditionally, and his tendency to respond to anger with lasers or yelling makes me think that he hasn't had a lot of time to work on developing healthier coping mechanisms, which makes me think he's still fairly young (again, not young young, but younger than middle age). Unlike how he's unconsciously Reginald's (sole) source of stability, Reginald more directly keeps him in check by restraining him by the arm or giving orders as needed.

None of this is to say that them being older is unrealistic, but this is just me dumping my own thoughts and headcanons