#as usual i am a snail of an artist

[artoyu]

Switched roles AU: Navy captain Kazuha + travelling mercenary Beidou

Fugitive Kazuha is captured by the Shogun’s forces and serves time as firstly, a prisoner of Inazuma’s thunderous seas and secondly, to monitor the coasts for any unauthorized travelers. He cuts his hair and rises the ranks to become the naval captain of his own ship, Captain Manyou of the Gusting Gale. 

After a major storm that decimates the Crux, Beidou ends up near the coasts of Inazuma. She is rescued by the naval captain and temporarily joins him before she begins her journey to find survivors of her own crew. As a mercenary, she gathers her victories and funds for travel from bounties. 

More notes because I’m a kazoo simp and baedou is my SEA QUEEN: 

Both Beidou and Kazuha carry their original elemental visions and original weapons (ex. Beidou still carries an electro vision and wields a claymore).

The major storm that decimates the Crux was the battle of Osial.

Of the two, Beidou is still better at sailing than Kazuha having longer experience as a pirate. 

She keeps her hair in a ponytail-bun to fight without much hair in her face.

Initially Kazuha becomes a sea laborer and sailor in exchange for keeping his vision. This is meant to be a life and death sentence in itself considering the treacherous seas of Inazuma, riddled with broken ships. With his keen sense of the winds, he has been able to survive the sea storms longer than anyone has expected.  

Pressure from the commissions leads Kazuha to change his identity to avoid rousing public eye. Kazuha or “万葉” can be read as “manyou”.

Kazuha still plans to change the Vision Hunt Decree, and he is biding his time. As captain, he also bends the rules and attempts to take Inazuman escapees into his crew if they choose. 

He wears more green over red to show that he has yet to break free from the Shogun’s control. This reflects how maple leaves are green before turning red in autumn, and his secret ambitions. In colour theory, green is a natural corrector to redness and the opposite of red. For aesthetic purposes, I used the leaves of Japanese black lace maple as inspiration:

Bonus traveling merc Beidou sketch with different armour:

[bestiarium]

The Weewillmekq [Algonquin mythology; Native American mythology]

This creature, which originates from myths of the Native American Algonquin people in Canada, is a bit of an enigma. It is usually described as a small worm – about 2 – 3 inches or 5 – 8 cm long – inhabiting forested areas and found on dry wood. Though sometimes a Weewillmekq resides in rivers, in which case the creature is about as large as an adult horse and has forked horns on its head (sometimes it also has burning eyes like flames). Often, however, they are said to be snails rather than worms and the Passamaquoddy people even associate them with alligators. Regardless of what form the creature takes, it is always a powerful and mysterious supernatural being wielding potent magic.

In one particular anecdote, the Weewillmekq have the ability to attract lightning. More importantly, they can take on the form of a human being and – presumably – walk among us.

An Algonquin legend called ‘the dance of old age’ tells of an attractive young Wabanaki man whose beauty was matched by his bravery and hunting skills. He caught the eye of a girl in the village, who asked him to marry her. Though she was a beautiful woman, the man was busy preparing for a great hunt and couldn’t resort to such emotional theatrics. And so he turned her down. Unbeknownst to him, the girl was experienced in magic and cursed him for wounding her pride. She spoke: “you may go now, but you shall never return like you went”. Nothing happened and the young man left, neither fearing nor caring about her curse. Time passed, and one day in mid-winter, when the boy was out in the forest with his brother, the girl’s magic struck him, breaking his mind and rendering him insane.

The young man’s older brother understood what had happened. Now desperate to save his brother, he went to find a river and started chanting a song to summon a Weewillmekq. “What do you want from me?” asked the monster. The man replied “I wish to restore my brother’s sanity”. “That which you ask of me, I shall grant you, provided you are not afraid.” But the man was incredibly brave and said “I am not scared of anything”. “Not even of me?” asked the horned creature. “No, not of you, not even of Mitche-hant.” (small note: Mitche-hant is a dangerous creature associated with evil. He is compared with the Christian devil). And so the creature agreed to grant the man his wish, but on one condition: he had to prove his bravery by grabbing the Weewillmekq by his horns and scrape residue off them with his knife. Though the monster was terrifying, the man complied and did as he was told. The Weewillmekq then gave him instructions to mix half of the horn scrapings in a cup of water and make his brother drink it. This would heal his mind. The other half should be mixed with the drink of the girl who cast the curse: this would be her punishment.

Again, the man did as instructed, and the mixture healed his brother. The two went back to their village, where they found that a large party was going on. People were dancing and having fun, and the spellcaster was among them. The younger brother sought her out and offered her the drink with the horn scrapings in it. She was merry and tired from dancing, and so did not notice who he was. Without thinking she took the cup and drank it.

The spell took effect immediately: with every turn the girl took while dancing, the aged one year. Starting out as a young girl, she soon became 50 when reaching the other end of the room. When she reached her starting point, she was 100 years old and dropped dead on the floor.

Source: Leland, C. G., 1884, The Algonquin Legends of New England: Myths and Folk Lore of the Micmac, Passamaquoddy and Penobscot Tribes, S. Low, Marston, Searle and Rivington, 379 pp, pages 324-333. (image source : ‘Oral Stories, Dreams and Experiences’ by Jeremy Dennis. You can support the artist or look at his other works on Native American mythology at jeremynative.com)

[fanaticsnail]

At this point, I'll make a "physics of One Piece" blog it could be fun.

I'm glad you like the physics, Snail. I'm currently working on Doflamingo's flying speed as seen in Ep 625 when he arrives at Punk Hazard. I was really surprised when I went to Doflamingo's page and saw there was no weight? So I went to calculate his BMI index for his height and yeah, he is perfect for cuddles.

Doflamingo’s Arm Length

Okay, I always wanted to know this. This isn’t my area of expertise bcs usually body proportions are for artists, but it’s fine. Okay, normal body proportion for arms for humans is 45% of their height. Since the proportions of Doflamingo’s body are different, his limb length will be different, too.

So, with 45% (normal) his arms would be 1.37m long. 

If his body proportions were normal, that is. Here are things with Oda’s proportions.

The legs are fucking long, and fckn thin. Actually, the thinnes is good, the less weight, the more you get the force into the kick and into running speed. This also means a lot of the character’s weight is on their torso. By logic, they should not be able to stand 🤣

Hands don’t end on thighs, but above the knee.

His hands, when by his sides, reach a bit lower than his thigh. Usually, your hand reaches right on your thigh, a bit below your trouser pockets. Doflamingo’s reaches lower than that.

With that in mind, we’ll follow Oda’s lead and exaggerate to figure out how long that arm is. We can make it as long as we want bcs it doesn’t influence his height at all.

1.5 m is a nice number.

Length.

Of Doflamingo’s.

Arm. 

Good luck running away from him. One wide-as-you-can running step width of a non-athletic, average human is 0.8 meters, 1.2m or 1.4 meters like when you STRETCH YOUR RUNNING FOOT AS FAR AS YOU CAN, not that small little jog. Small normal jog width is 4-8cm. 

Eight. Centimeters. 

Don’t even fckn try if you’re gonna do a little jog width step, just stay put at that point. So, even with maximum width a human is capable of, Doffy just extends his hand like it’s nothing and he’s got you. 

Now imagine, with both arms, that is literally 3 meters of his arms wrapped around you. (Sighs wistfully)

- physics anon

I would follow a physics of One Piece Blog. Absolutely I would. "He's perfect for cuddles." Excuse me:

1.5m length of Doflamingo's arm. I am just taller than the length of one of his arms. Just one of them. I just want to scream. He's just 🤌.

To be caged in that embrace, I just want to:

Yandere Doffy, running away from him as fast as your little legs can carry you, only to be scooped up like it's nothing 🫠.

You're panting, out of breath, exhausted, fatigued, and he's barely phased: tugging you beneath one of his arms and ready to take back to his room where he'll never let you get another opportunity to escape again. You're his. His. His special person. He's gonna trap you in that 3m cage like it's nothing, tugging you to him, pouting and whining in your neck like:

I love you, physics anon. You're priceless and I am very much enjoying these thoughts!! AAAAAAAA

[starchyu]

𝓟𝓮𝓷𝓹𝓪𝓵(𝓼) 𝓦𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓭

Seeking soft like-minded penpal!

            Hoping to find someone with overlapping tastes and interests with interested and passionate in writing and exchanging letters~

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Howdy! My name is Quinn (Doll, Jinx, Ghost, etc~) I’m in the US and I’m looking for a penpal! I’m hoping to find someone with similar tastes and interests to me so we can talk about all sorts of wonderful things together! I’m AuDHD, have some other things on the side, and a chronic pain condition that keeps me from working a “normal” 9-5 job so I freelance and do graphic design/illustrator work which usually ends up being commission work for people!! I’m passionate about art and have a wide plethora of interests that I would like my penpal to match up with to some degree! 

ABOUT ME Born in the US. English speaking. I was born in Texas before relocating a bit north. I’ve been penpalling semi-regularly since 2013 and really enjoy what I do. I sometimes will record the process of preparing a letter to post to my very small tiny youtube channel and use it as a way to preserve the letters i send out? I do a lot of decorating so it’s a way to preserve these pieces of “interactive art” that I send to people~ I’m a student currently in school for graphic design and someday I’d like to become a tattoo artist but I don’t know if I will ever be able to accomplish that goal because of my joint pain.  I’m hoping that if someone answers this they’re wanting the same things I am? I’m pretty prompt with snail mail replies and would love a semi-regular exchange or updates if you expect for letters to get sent out slower? 

Hobbies Sewing - crafting - journaling - writing (rp and fanfic, but some original things on the side!) - embroidery - art!! I use a lot of different mediums from watercolor to oil pastels!! Someday I hope to get into model making or miniature making à la “Studson Studios”!!! - Collecting (teacups, stamps, stickers, stationery, postcards~) - reading! - character/oc design~

Interests & Passions This is going to be a longer section, sorry in advance!! A lot of my interests rattle around in my head and because of the autism I cling to these things feverishly. They all overlap and I talk about them obsessively, tbh? So if these things and vibes aren’t something you enjoy please just skip over this~  “Cozy” Gaming ♡ Genshin Impact (wanderer main, thats my pookie) ♡ BG3 ♡ Anime (specifically magical girls and romance! I love a select few shonen anime such as Naruto!) Big favs include Naruto, Death Note, TBHK, Horimiya, and Orange just to name a few ♡ JFASHION!; I *love* Gyaru and EGL specifically and also enjoy mori kei quite a bit! But I love fashion in general and am always eager to talk about style and clothing (especially on a budget!!!) ♡ MUSIC!!! I’m very particular about my music tastes. I listen to a lot of jrock/jpop, rock, metal, nu metal, post hardcore, EDM, house, trance, and techno! I also love a lot of music that was very popular circa 2010s youtube~ ♡ Vocaloids!! ♡ BDSM/Kink lifestyles~ ♡ Dolls! Specifically BJDs, though ♡ Ballet ♡ Renaissance and baroque art ♡ Dungeons and Dragons and TTRPGs in general ♡ Tea ♡ Bridgerton ♡ Period Peace romances~ ♡ Romance in general ♡ Fairies ♡ angels ♡ new age beliefs and practices ♡ journaling ♡ therian/otherkin identities ♡ ghosts/spirits/paranormal/occult things ♡ vegetarianism/veganism ♡ photography 

If I had to sum myself up in a few words I suppose I’d say something like… “Dusty regal doll left on a shelf or in a glass box, haunted by an ancient spirit of questionable origins.” Or something along those lines. Sounds a bit cheesy but again, these things are important to me!!

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Style Preferences I tend to send wildly different letters. I specialize in “themed” letters, though. I love to decorate pertaining to certain things- Seasons, media that I and my penpal like, or even focusing on specific colors and color palettes. If everything before this sounds good, and you do end up reaching out? Please let me know what kind of letters you like the most! What are your favorite styles? You can probably get an idea of my tastes from my blog so I’ll spare the ramble. 

IDEAL PENPAL Above 20 years old Long term! Snail mail *and* email penpals welcome!! Though I do prefer snail mail~ LGBTQIA+ friendly. Someone inclusive who is also maybe a part of the community. Any gender, identity, etc welcome.  Someone open for heavier conversations who are looking to form a genuine friendship?

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

So! If any of this sounds good to you/is interesting? Or if you have questions, comments or concerns, feel free to DM here? Or you can reach me at,,,

Starchyu@gmail.com  

[softichill]

AAAARG! Now there are two bonus videos. I'm so sorry to put pressure on you but there is a thing happening! Events! Magical events that you may or may not know about but I am gushing! I feel like my mom nagging me but at least this one is innocuous. I hope. As for me, I'm going to go look for fanart of said events. And probably take tomorrow off. I'm supposed to be taking as much as I can off this week but I need Taco shells. I wonder if that meat is still good anyways. Have Be Right Back from Lord Condor. I didn't send this already, right?

It's okay I don't mind lol!! Glad that exciting stuff is happening :Dc

Okay I went to youtube to find the song and I. Saw the hfjone video. Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy fucking shit. Also I think I'm gonna watch the II and BFDIA episodes now

Before the Last Summer Ends by Snail's House! Much more orchestral than this artist's usual stuff

[talmineer]

Kiss In The Dark

(I) The Broken One

    To say she was an interesting choice would be an understatement; I'm a creature of fine and exotic taste after all. The thing that drew my interest towards her was how she had the fighting spirit of a rabid wolf trapped in the body of meager pooch. I remember the day like the shadows on my walls; always there, always lingering.

I remember what I was wearing. A nice lavender button up long-sleeved, coupled with a black vest and pants. As per the usual, I had wore white gloves. The masquerade mask I had chosen for the day was the visage of a silver owl. I refused to leave my home in the daylight; it would reveal myself to those who I don't want to see me. I hate unwanted visitors...

But her? she was the opposite. She looked pathetic next to the others. Her pale blonde hair was frizzled and in a mess, her skin dirty and unwashed; I could see the dirt piling underneath her finger nails. Underneath her green eyes were the darkest shadows I had ever seen on a face, she looked like she had lost more than three days worth of rest. She was not even dressed properly; a broken product that the investors had no interest of selling before they could fix it. 

Truthfully at the time, I was considering the other options. While I waved my torch examining the other products, my mind could not stop conceiving the broken one. The beautiful ones; the ones that were ready for sale just did not appeal to me...they had already been tamed, already been propped up as a generic item. 

The other one though; oh she was special. There's something that many tend to forget; what's so beautiful about a blank canvas is that you can shape it anyway you want.

"Are you going to make your selection?"

One of the investors requested of me, his voice echoed through the hood of his brown robe and reverbed off the stone walls. I responded with a nod, and waved the flame of the torch towards the face of the broken one. She was so tired, she responded to the glare in her face much too late, as if she were a snail caught in the tracks of a coach wagon.

"Are you sure about her sir? There are others worth much more for your coin. Besides, there are no negotiations for price in this business." 

"I assure you, I am making a sound decision with this one. She will be worth more come due time." 

I informed him. 

"Very well, let us see to your purchase then."

As the agreement was made, the investor reached into his robe to pull out an iron key, he pushed it into the shackles that confined the product's wrist. When they fell down to her lap, I saw that they were a bright red, almost as much as an apple. The investor grabbed hold of her by her wrist, forcefully pulling her up and dragging her along. As she finally stood up, I saw that her stature was short; the pointed ears and hair that covered her shins and ankles let me know that she was a halfling woman- something I was not expecting at the time. 

While her captor guided her down the long and dark corridor, she could be heard grunting quietly and vainly attempting to pull her arm away from him. 

Unacceptable behavior.

A part of me felt something I had not felt in a long time a feeling of pure excitement. Every attempt to pull away, trying so desperately to run- let me know that I was in for quite the experience. I felt the rush of an artist, eagerly waiting to brush away on the blank canvas; molding it into the perfect masterpiece. I felt....

LUST.

[blackbearybrambles]

Well howdy there pardner

Okay I thought I should make a pinned post about me cause I don’t have one yet (I do now hehe)

my name’s Bear! I am a minor so pls keep that in mind I use he/him pronouns, my favorite bands/artists atm are Sir Chloe, Bears In Trees, Snail Mail, Bad Bunny, aaand Daffo :D

I love fall, mountain biking!!!!!, big dogs, wilderness adventures, stone fruits, plantains, california poppies, comic books, my friends <3 <3 , misty mornings, rock climbing!, the way old heaters smell, weird little things that are found in the corners of existence, the color yellow, and many more but I think I’ll stop there <3

I don’t have any tags but I could probably make some I usually forget to tag things but uhhhhhhhhh # bear says things is just me being silly ig uhm idrk

DNI if: you are antisemitic, transphobic, homophobic, islamophobic, racist, xenophobic, pedophilic, a terf, sexist or anyone who’s discriminatory

uhhhhhh yeah I think that’s it!! Thank you for coming to check out my dumb lil blog! Have a lovely day/night <3

[ronjawalkinaround]

Evaluation & reflection

Throughout the year I have been exploring themes of fantastical world-making and creatures, people's need for escaping reality, fever dreamish states, the underworld.

I have always been inspired by all artists who do their work unapologetically and actively, who make instead of whining, who have opinions but are not focused on politics, and who appeal to the human nature in general. Usually, movie creators leave the biggest impression for the longest amount of time. This year I have discovered and rediscovered directors like Dario Argento, Andrzej Żuławski, Akira Kurosawa, Francis Ford Coppola, and Russ Meyer. Their movies stayed with me and showed how a complete, balanced, detailed world with its own rules, colours, and soundtrack is created.

For the first time I have looked more specifically into women artists. That's not because I was avoiding them, but because I never wanted to make a distinction (which to be honest, I still believe we shouldn't). However, I found out about some amazing women like Collete Lumier, Dorothea Tanning, and many more. They have also been creators of worlds, whether it be inside 2D works, or in a home environment.

I went to many exhibitions, however, none of them left a really big impression. I think I am becoming quite strongly critical about not only myself, but others, and it is hard to find something great that is newly made. I understand it's a cynical perspective, and it always fluctuates. Sometimes it's a strong feeling that no one can create good things, sometimes - I appreciate the details and find meaning. In any case, I am sure there are brilliant creators out there, I will keep looking.

Methodology:

There is never much research involved in making my works, they are usually intuitive and hand-led. There is usually no sketch and no idea beforehand. However, this year there were some exceptions. My works related to snails were all thought out, they were related. I was also learning about specific materials and techniques (porcelain, screenprinting, Photoshop) as I went along, and thought (and read) a lot about pipes, in regards to my double pipe idea.

While making porcelain works, I was followed by failure, everything kept breaking, from smaller pieces, to the biggest ones. It's really disheartening seeing that, but at least I learned some lessons about porcelain, and about glue.

I have been recording small steps that I took in pictures and videos. And then, in the end of the year, I got to play with a good camera, mmm, that was beautiful.

The project was being created slowly throughout the whole year. Some parts of it had to fall off, and some added on. Even though I had a schedule, it kept changing according to each different day. I knew that my final project would include many details, so I was not too worried about specific quantities or materials, it was all quite experimental.

The main problem is of course not feeling good enough, wether it be about the 'empty' space or about quality of the works, technical or idea-wise. I do feel strongly about some of the works though, and that helps to keep the confidence.

The editing aspect is also difficult. Deciding which works are not good enough to show, when they are all so dear, is a hard thing, but it teaches to try and look through the viewer's eyes and to get detached.

It was very interesting to explore my scale, as I always loved the small paintings, however felt that they were not strong enough on their own, and now realised that it's just not good thinking, it does not matter which scale you choose, quality of the work itself is the only thing that matters, and small scaled work has the intimacy that is lost while working in larger scales.

Do I already know how to properly evaluate that quality of work? Probably not, especially with my works, I can just analyse some specifics and say, that sometimes they feel strong, and sometimes they don't. I do believe though, that if the work is really good, there is no need to know anything, you just know.

It was a good year for experimentation. I tried some new techniques like printmaking on fabric, figuring out porcelain, painting on marble, using expanding foam and flock for 3D sculptures, and managing people's hair, while still remaining the passion for my usual medias - painting, ceramics, printmaking. I was very busy all year it seemed, there was not a single time I was bored, which I find a really big deal. I spent many hours in the studios and in the workshops (although I wish the finishing one would have been shown earlier). There was also of course the small problem of being a new person on the final year course, but that solved itself quite quickly, and I'm very glad to have found some warm interesting people.

The university did give some great things, a lot of inspirations and tips, let me explore new techniques and ways of thinking, however I still feel like it wasn't enough. I want more history, more real life advice, and more skill. These are all things I will try to find from now on.

I leave now having more experience and a couple of friends, thank you for that, and for everything else I haven't mentioned.

[fakeloveaskblog]

(Hi, me again. Not sure if this is what you’re going for but the tiny snails reminds me of the ones that Snail had torment Os.)

Im going to use my ghostly abilities to send a duplicate of myself to quickly check on Os and see if he’s close.

If he is then I’ll see if he’s coming to the art exhibition or just passing by. 

If he’s passing by then I’ll warn Remy he’s close but hold off on telling Remus unless he looks like he’s making his was towards the art gallery.

If he’s coming towards the gallery than I’ll warn Remus and ask him what he wants to do. I’ll offer ghostly services, such as teleporting Remus somewhere safe or making a sudden hole in the ground in front of Os so he falls in. But ultimately leave the decision in Remus’s hands.

If he’s nowhere near us then I’ll breathe a sigh of relief and encourage Remy to follow the snails, because snails are very trustworthy.

Glow Eyes 

(Bingo)

Os had spent enough time with the other supernatural beings to feel your presence as soon as you appeared floating along as he walked. He stuck out his hand right in front of your face and watched as your body floated through the materia. By his expression it seemed he hadn't done it to actually stop you, just to see if he could.

"Now I understand why the snails left for once, since you're here. Did the snails get tired?" He asked while continuing to walk along the sidewalk in a brisk pace. "Am I going to get hounded by a flock of yous from now on...Doesn't matter. It's funny, a guy I know told me he saw a poster with what looked like my apartment on it detailing an art show. What a coincidence, I used to date a wannabe artist. Funny how that works" His voice was dripping with sarcasm "You can tell that to your flock of other yous so they know where to come to bother me"

He didn't expect an answer from you nor did he keep talking. He usually didn't talk to the snails either. All you could do was follow along as he rounded a corner and faraway you could see the art exhibition.

-

"Looks like everythings okay on the upper floor" Remus said as he came back to the reception.

The receptionist had gone on her lunch break so it was just him and Remy. His partner moved their cane away to give space for him. They htook a hold of his hand when he sat down on the window sill next to them. He pressed a kiss against their cheek.

"You smell like toootalll garbage" Remy said.

"My oh my such a fancyful compliment" Remus replied before leaning his head against theirs.

A sickly blue color filled the entire room as you appeared, your glow shifted rapidly between shades of the kind of blue plastered all over hospital walls. The words spilled out of your mouth vomit, some hasty sentences about Os being on his way and what Remus wanted to do.

A piercing sort of rage went through Remy as they reached their free hand to grab their cane. Remus had protected them against Virgil. They were hell bent on doing the same.

They looked over to Remus and saw that he already had a thousand yard stare. His body had tensed up to the point that his nails was digging into the skin of Remy's hand without him noticing.

His lips turned white from how hard he was pressing them together as tears welled up into his eyes. His entire body went stagnant, he didn't even blink.

Remy was about to ask if he was alright when a choked sob of a sound burst from his lips followed by him trying to force himself to breathe while quickly letting go of his partner's hand. He shook his head while closing his eyes.

"No....no..i...i made the art for a reason...he can...i just...don't wanna be near him i just"

"Deep breathe babey"

All of a sudden Remus just knew Oswald was there. It was like when a person can be recognized simply by the noise of their steps. There was a ringing in his ears as if the ocean was crashing into him.

Remus stood up and turned around. On the other side of the glass stood Oswald, his face half obscured by the poster for the art exhibition.

Os hadn't seen him though. He was looking at the poster and even though his expression didn't change much Remus could still tell as he slowly took in what the art work implied. The perfect recreation of the outside of his apartment. The title. That it had been chosen to be the focus of the exhibition. It was a threat...or perhaps just a message telling Os to never get close to him ever again.

The edges of Remus' sight turned blurry as Os moved his head and saw him. Remus glanced away, he stared off somewhere to a tree far away. He couldn't meet his eyes. The last times he'd seen those eyes....Honestly he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure if it was when he had been held down against his will or if he had somehow caught a glimpse of those eyes as Rowan had helped him out of the apartment.

His vision became even more blurry as he started to cry. He was sure he had the same doe caught in traffic lights look he always had when panicking. Like a bunny caught in a bear trap. When the fox hears the bunny call it comes but never to help don't you know.

Worst part was that Os didn't look affected at all. It only made Remus feel more ashamed. Of course he didn't care. Of course he'd moved on. Of course. Of course.

It would have been easy to say that Remus felt like a scared lonely teen again. That he felt just like when he'd met Os. Like the fear of seeing him again had made him feel small.

But truth be told Remus didn't feel small. He was scared and his body ached from how tense he was and he could feel phantom hands all over but he didn't feel weak.

He felt like he was 22 and like he wasn't alone because he had 2 partners and even though he felt sick to his stomach he knew Os couldn't touch him. He knew he was safe. He knew he had people who loved him and who wouldn't touch him when slept and who he could cry in front of without being scared and who wouldn't call him she or her ever again.

Remus still didn't meet Os' eyes, not because he was scared but because Os didn't fucking deserve to ever see him in the eyes ever again.

A righteous rage shoot through his muscles making his whole body shake as he mouthed out "Go away" To Oswald.

"Go away!" He repeated.

He couldn't stand to see his abuser for a single more second so he turned around. For a few seconds he could still feel Os' eyes looking at him before the feeling disappeared. He stood there shaking and crying until his legs suddenly buckled under him and he turned into a half sobbing dissociated mess on the floor.

Remy had been silently sitting next to him the entire time with their cane ready. They may not be that strong but could still slam their cane into a motherfucker's crotch if Os had dared to try and enter the building.

Drops of sweat was running down Remus' forehead as he cried the kind of ugly cry where snot got everywhere and his face got blotchy and red and the tears were spilling out over his cheeks without any stopping.

"You're safe. He's gone" Was the first thing Remy said.

Remus nodded while wiping snot on his shirt. He couldn't speak, not right now. At most he was able to slur out a "...feel sick.." While dissociating.

"We can get home in like no time okay. Want me to call like Jannie over as well?"

His thoughts were too jumbled to be able to hesitate about it. He nodded only because the thought of Janus made him feel safe and warm.

"Okay. I'll call them. I'll tell the receptionist we had to close early for today. Everything's like totally alright" Remy assured before turning to you and mouthing that you should still make Os fall down a hole. Or get hit by lightning. Or get run over. Or get his dick bitten off. Anything.

[they-handed-me-the-moon]

Hi again!

I collect CDs. I really don’t have the room to collect CDs, especially since I’ve moved so much recently. But, they’re usually cheap and I can play them in my car so here I am. 

I work in libraries and also have a problem with book collecting! My book collection keeps growing faster than I’m reading. It’s a problem. 

I forgot to answer the one about artists I dislike. I cannot stand Elvis and Jimmy Buffett. I just can’t do it.

Do you have a favorite song that came out this year?

Oh hey, you work in libraries?? I also—well at any rate, I'm working towards working in libraries! I finished an MA in Library Studies this summer and just got offered a job working Saturdays in a public library—it's not much, but it's a start!

Hehe, I don't have strong anti-Elvis feelings, but I do get it—I have yet to manage to connect to his music. (I'm not familiar enough with Jimmy Buffet to have any particular feelings about him).

Collecting CD's is a great way to go! For all the convince of digital media, it still feels awfully nice to hold on to some things in physical form.

Oh boy, that's a hard question 😅 I'm not quite a grumpy old man grousing about how they just don't make music like they used to—I'm sure there's plenty of new stuff I'd love if I only found it—but I'm deeply disconnected when it comes to new releases; I take in new music at a snail's pace and through my own meandering channels, which do not actively exclude but also don't exactly keep me up to date on new releases.

... all of which is to say I was sitting here dismayed to find that I wasn't sure anything I've gotten into this year is, in fact from this year. But then I remembered that Carly Rae Jepsen had come to the rescue by releasing a new album at the end of October. I only realized this a few days ago (even my favorite artists can't escape my level of disconnect from new releases) so I haven't had time to listen to the album properly and pull out a favorite yet. But she released one of the tracks earlier this year, Western Wind, and I've listened to that a bunch, so it wins by default. By some chance it came on the playlist I'm listening to right as I typed that it was the winner, just in time to remind me that even if it is a win by default, I do love the song.

How about you?

[great-and-small]

My friends, please allow me to be a monumental buzzkill for just a moment. I’m really bothered by seeing animal-lovers unknowingly sharing staged, abusive, wildlife photography. Abusive photographers exploit people’s passion for these animals, and cause irreparable harm in doing so. You have definitely seen these photos: cute frogs and lizards pictured in sweet scenes with butterflies and garden snails. Lots of times they’re doing something silly like holding a leaf as an umbrella or “dancing” upright. Unfortunately, many people do not have the zoology background to recognize this behavior as unnatural and staged. Let’s take a look at three really popular ones from one photographer that you’ve probably seen around on the internet.

1- Frog with Snails. This image doesn’t raise any huge red flags aside from the “Too Good to be True” feeling that you get here. Those snails are perfectly placed and the frog is perfectly in focus staring at the camera. In an interview with DailyMail, the photographer stated that the frog is his pet and the encounter happened organically when “the snails appeared to want to play with the frog”. What a crazy coincidence- he has an almost identical shot of a Red-Eyed Crocodile Skink in his portfolio (worth noting: these skinks are notoriously elusive and distressed by human handling)

So yeah, no signs of overt abuse with the Princess Leia Frog, but almost certainly not the random whimsical encounter described by the artist

2- Big Froggy Grin. This is a Javan gliding tree frog and I have a few concerns about the way the animal in this image appears. Firstly, the way this frog is holding its mouth open appears very unnatural. Although frogs will sometimes open their mouths wide when shedding their skin, it’s usually only for a few moments and they can be seen actively using their limbs to help with the shed. It’s possible that the frog had JUST swallowed a large prey item but in that scenario you would expect the eyes to be closed or retracted inward, as anurans use their eyes to help push prey down their throat. Frogs breathe by a mechanism called “buccal pumping”, requires their mouth to be closed. A frog cannot breathe with its mouth open, which is why these “smiling” pictures always make me a little nervous! There is speculation that some photos like this are made by propping the frog’s mouth open with string, or even putting the animal in the refrigerator to slow it down, then posing it like a doll.

On top of that unnatural gaping mouth, this frog appears to have slight anisocoria, meaning one of his pupils is more dilated than the other. This can be a sign of serious neurological disease, inflammation, or head trauma. We can’t know if this is the case here, or even if this frog is unwell but it does worry me a little. 

3- Crocodile Taxi. This one has been ALL over the internet in meme form and I just cringe a little bit every time I see it. The photographer said the frogs inexplicably all climbed aboard the juvenile crocodile at once and he just “had to wait a long time to see the frogs climb on to the crocodile's back. The key was to stay still and remain patient.” I am not buying this one either. These are Australian White’s tree frogs and nothing in their behavior patterns makes this make sense. The frogs are not in an amplexus position and the odds of all five of these frogs coincidentally climbing aboard is so unlikely. Not to mention this appears to be a juvenile Saltwater crocodile, whose habitat doesn’t really overlap with White’s tree frogs. The photographer risked these animals lives by placing them on top of a predator, all for a cute photo that he insists was not staged. It’s interesting though that what appears to be the very same crocodile seems to feature in many other images in his portfolio:

This is NOT normal frog behavior and to present it as such, while also endangering the frogs in question is pretty terrible.

Why does this matter? It isn’t just the fact that presenting these photos as organic encounters is dishonest (of course that’s bad enough) but the real issue is that this kind of photography harms animals. These images anthropomorphize wildlife in a way that promotes serious misunderstanding of animal behavior. It is incredibly unethical to manipulate animals like this just for the perfect shot. When we see photos like this, we MUST consider if any abuse or cruelty could have been involved in the creation of the scene. As any biologist can tell you- when humans anthropomorphize animals too much, it’s the animals that suffer for it. These pictures spread like wildfire across the internet because we love animals SO much, but it isn’t fair for us to only love a version of them that does not, in truth, exist. Here is a great article for a more in-depth investigation into the troubling phenomenon of staged wildlife photography: https://www.pbs.org/newshour/science/whimsical-wildlife-photography-isnt-seems

I would love to hear from other biologists, vets, herpetologists, etc about this matter. I am a veterinary student with a particular interest in reptiles and amphibians but I still have so much to learn, please weigh in if you think my assessment of these photos is missing something! What do you guys think about this? How can we better educate our friends online to see these seemingly cute images with a critical eye?

[majimanowhere]

Hello~ may I get a matchup? <3

Fandom: yakuza

Pronouns: she/her/they

Preference: any gender

Sexuality: aromantic cupiosexual(mine)

Mbti&Enneagram: esfp 9w8 or 6w7, very unsure

Personality: I’m an ambiverted person that loves to achieve my goals while also living my life instead of only surviving it. I would also describe myself as someone that rises to be independent while also accepting help from others. I surly try to hide my sadness in order to not turn down the mood, since I want my friends to have a good time. Although I’m good at listening and giving advice to my friends while talking about something deep. I love hugs and physical touch, but I mostly give it to those I feel quite close to. My dream is to be a tattoo artist and one of the styles I love quite much is the irezumi, which is why I can be seen fangirling or at least a dire people with irezumi tattoo. But my style that would love to do on others is realistic art of anything. I also care about my grades, but I do not stress myself over them too much cause I know that the world won’t look at my grades that much when I’m applying for a job. It’s the experience tans mindset that counts. I can seem distant and cold, since I try to be logical but I and my friends do know that deep inside, I do care quite much about others. A funny thing is that my friends always says that I’m mysterious since I don’t talk that much about myself. This might be because I love hearing more about other peoples lives and experience. I also love going out and buy things like clothes, boba, coffee and do window shopping. Nowadays I can usually be seen at a cafe with my computer while doing school work or research cause I do wanna do my best and boast to my younger brothers. I am also often seen outside or in a cafe while talking to my friends about whatever comes to mind. But sometimes I can be quite detached from the world, especially when I’m drawing. No one dares to touch or bother me while I’m drawing cause I will literally attack someone with my pen.

Hobbies: drawing, watch movies/series, train kickboxing, go out, writing, earn money(from my job), scroll through the internet, enjoy life, learn about anything that interests me etc…

Interests: the mafia and yakuza, lifestyle tips, tattoos, how to earn money, martial arts, coffee making etc…

Likes: honest and straightforward people, independent people, open minded people cause I am one, tattoos, boba tea, coffee, outfit ideas, peace, solving problems and conflicts etc…

Dislikes: dishonesty, bullying, unnecessary violence, poverty, misunderstandings, people that refuse to talk things out, snails, stress, group pressure etc…

I kinda went off and wrote a lot but I hope you don’t mind😅 I wish you a great year and do take your time with this request! <3

HIHIHI sorry it took me so damn long to get to this, my life has been incredibly frantic!

i also want to apologize for the short length and if there’s any spelling/grammar errors! i’m doing this at 1am and im sick AND i’m not wearing my glasses LMAOOO

i match you with…

majima!

i have a couple different thoughts depending on the timeline!

i think you guys would get along quite nicely in terms of morals and ideologies (honesty, poverty, listening to others experiences [more so y0 majima])

i feel like he would find your hobbies quite interesting! coffee making, kickboxing, martial arts, i can see him thoroughly enjoying your thoughts and ideas on these topics. especially in terms of art. i can’t see him being a great artist himself, so that’s why he would enjoy yours! he likes your ideas for tattoo designs and irezumis and would probably give his opinion and experience on them. when you become a tattoo artist you can touch up his tat for him!

it might take him a while to open up a bit and talk seriously, but i feel like once he does you can ask him to talk about the yakuza and his personal experience. not only is this letting you get to know him better and listening to his struggles, but it’s also learning about yakuza!

i think he would enjoy your presence as you guys are similar in ways (in terms of him and not his mad dog persona). he would agree with your sentiment of living instead of surviving as living life to the fullest is what he’s all about! if he’s in his mad dog persona i feel like your mysterious aura would be a great contrast to his loud and obnoxious self.

when you’re detached from the world that’s when he steps in! you’ll be daydreaming while he keeps watch in case anyone tries to mess with you. you won’t have to worry about anyone sneaking up on you in kamurocho/sotenbori.

however i feel communication might be where you guys run into issues. not because you guys aren’t honest, but because you would both struggle to talk about your own feelings and mental health. you don’t talk much about yourself and neither does he (or at least honestly).

in terms of mad dog majima can see y’all meeting at a cafe. you’ll be on your laptop or drawing and he’ll be a regular at the cafe. whenever he comes in you always look at him (since he looks kinda weird LMAO). after a while of seeing you look at him he walks up and asks you what you’re doing/why you’re looking at him. you tell him why you’re looking at him and your love for art and it goes from there!

[buckgasms]

Hello!!! Can i request a me x character ship? I'm 1.63, virgo, chubby, love gardening, books, and anything cooking& baking related. I also play chess, cards, and the flute. I'm usually pretty reserved at first, but when I get to trust someone I reveal the utter nut case I am. Booksmart, but in social situations I can be pretty daft. I have a dressy style, and my make up go to is natural glam (red lip, mascara, eyeliner, golden simmer). Curly mane of hair, tiny waist (one of the few things I love about my body), big feet. I pretty much look like a stretched out Hobbit lol. Super cuddly and ticklish, and definitely a cat person, even if I tend to have the odd pet fish, snail, crow, swallow bird, or turtle once in a while. Absolute clutz tho. Thanks!!!

Hello sweetness! Thank you for sending this in!

You were a tricky one!!! I also got Disney Princess vibes from you too 💞 but I don't think I wanna put you in the Goldilocks AU either! Unless you like it 😂

I am feeling Viking!King Bucky for you baby!

I think he would like your artistic nature in contrast to his own more brutal life as a warrior king. You would be his relief in tough times and he would be desperate to be back in your arms if he was away too long.

Also I think he would find your clumsiness and occasional daftness endearing, showing your people that he was in fact human and not as stern as people thought he was.

Also you've proved yourself many times as being a wise counsel to your husband and helping him solve problems with empathy and enthusiasm that lightens the load on his shoulders.

I'm just imagining you wrapped in furs, beautiful hair whipping in the wind and just wow girl!

And he loves animals, so literally any animal that comes along is fair game to become a pet, no matter how big or small

I know that's aragorn but he gives me Viking Bucky vibes okaaaay???

Come celebrate 1.5k with me!

[dragonherder2030]

Was scrolling through your art because I was curious and bored, and uh-

You're a pretty great artist, I mean it, much better than I at... pretty much everything. I still have ways to go, obviously, even if I'm happy with it currently, still have much to learn.

You really deserve more attention, and I apologize greatly that you aren't getting what you deserve.

Thank u man, means a lot really! I’m super happy that u like my art that much, it just is so nice. Of course I still have a lot to learn too, I’ve been dabbling in backgrounds and have Kilometers to learn in lighting. I’m similar to u in that I’m happy with where I’m at.

I didn’t come onto tumblr to gain followers, gosh I’ve been here for like 2 or 3 years and don’t have 100 yet. But I’m ok with that, I just want to meet people and share my art. As long as I have ppl that will interact with me like You and Snail and Glitch and Cinnamon I’m happy. So no need to apologize that I don’t have more attention.

I shall take this opportunity to talk about something I’ve noticed about the popular artists. I follow this one Wof artist, the one who drew that amazing scene of a Silkwing in a black and white tree? I’m pretty sure u reblogged it at some point. When u scrolled through the reblogs you saw like, 7 or 8 at the time u know. I usually don’t reblog stuff unless it’s from a mutual that actively interacts, since I don’t like to clog my blog up with reblogs. But I looked at the reblogs to see if anyone was telling this artist how good the work was, and nothing. Only tags being #wof #silking stuff like that. It made me very sad, the post had a bunch of notes, a lot of attention but no interaction. I’ve seen this with another post. It is an interesting phenomenon.

So ya I would take interaction and friendship between mutuals over a bunch of reblog accounts sharing my work any day. I am satisfied.

[snowdropheart]

30, 31, 32

Hi, Fee! thank u babe <3

30. Name an album you really love that you haven't listened to in a while:

I absolutely adore Hounds of Love by Kate Bush; it's one of my favourite albums of all time, but I haven't listened to it all the way through in a while. "The Ninth Wave" is such a visceral listening experience, I can't just listen to it casually, so I always end up putting on the first half and stopping at "Cloudbusting." I usually listen to the latter half while writhing around on my bed in some strange, unchoreographed interpretative dance, lol. I should do that soon. It's very cathartic.

31. Name an album you've wanted to listen to for a long time, but you haven't gotten around to it yet:

I know Tomberlin had a released a new album a while ago, which I would love to listen to but haven't gotten around to yet. I've been meaning to check out more of Snail Mail's stuff. I really, really, want to listen to all of Lucy Dacus' discography. Tori Amos and Dar Williams both released new albums this year that I haven't listened to. There's a lot of music on my list to get around to listening, but here I am, just listening to the same few comforting songs over and over again because it's cold and dark out and new things are scary.

32. What is a band/artist you really wanted to start listening to, but you just really couldn't get into it?

I feel really bad saying this, but I've been trying to get into Joni Mitchell for years. I'm a huge folk fan, a huge singer-songwriter fan--Joni Mitchell is like the OG! I should love her! But I've just never been able to get into her music! I have no idea what it is, it's just never clicked with me. Maybe one day.

((That being said, I do love "Both Sides Now." But who doesn't love that song.))

Ask me things about music

[thephantomofthe-internet]

Read Into Me-Chapter 1: Wuthering Heights

Steve Harrington x Shy! Reader

CONTINUE READING THE SERIES HERE

Word Count: 2,849

Date Posted: 04/27/2020

Warnings: Swearing

Author’s Note: We starting something newww friends! If you liked or commented on my post about this series, you’re on the tag list! If you want off lemme know, it’s seriously no big deal. I’ve been working on this one for awhile, so if you liked it, please flash me a reblog or a reply! Criticism is always appreciated!

Tag List: @divinity-deos @thecaptainsgingersnap @wolfish-willow @scoopsohboi @herre-gud-nej @aclockworkballerina @maddie1504 @i-am-trash-so-much-its-scary @banjino-the-hole @buckysarge @wildcvltre @stanleyyelnatsiii @t0rment0 @10blurredsmoke10 @unusuallchildd @n3wtscaseofniffler5 @alwaysstressedout @peterparxour @linksispink1995 @asharpknife @alex--awesome--22 @baebee35 @marvelismylifffe @lilmissperfectlyimperfect

Flowers poked up between the sidewalk cracks, little white and yellow daisies blooming skyward, their heads turning to bask in the sun. Spring was bursting all over Hawkins, making the town reborn in pastels and Easter bonnets. Babies crawled around in the parks in white outfits, their mothers not worried about grass stains and cooing over their precious bundles of joy.

You crushed the daisies under your boots on your walk to school. You made a point to. They were begging to be crushed, stamped out by your heavy black soles. You didn’t like spring, you hated babies in their grass stained diapers and drool covered cheeks. You couldn’t place why you hated the season, it wasn’t as if you hated the cold or the rain which plagued March and early April, you adored the sound of rain on the Plexiglas roof of your family’s sunroom, thunder in the distance and swirling grey clouds swarming the sky. Then again, that wasn’t what spring wanted to be. Spring wanted to be beautiful bursts of colour and birds singing from their nests, babies crying into life and everything turning green.

Your hatred might have sprung from all that green, your mother had insisted on you taking up an artistic skill, supposedly because it made young women more worldly and affable, and sat you in art classes where you painted bouquets of flowers and bowls of fruit for hours every week. You didn’t hate art; it had become a release for you, a place to vent your emotions and makes something from your mind’s spinning thoughts. You’d filled sketchbooks and canvases with images of aliens and stars and snails. You liked to doodle snails and hourglasses on the margins of your homework. But your favourite thing was to draw your classmates. You were a quiet person, a sensitive soul according to your grandmother, and so often time’s people would ignore you flat out or discount your presence. This didn’t bother you so much, it gave you the chance to look at them without anyone asking any questions, to sketch out their image in charcoal and graphite, covering your hands in black and grey smudges. Your hands were constantly stained black, up the side of your hand to the tip of your pinkie, which meant that your jeans and shirts and sweater cuffs were smudged and stained.

You were sat on the football field’s bleachers one cool April morning, your best friend Samantha Cameron sat next to you, thin headset around the back of her head. She was unable to pull the headset around her black spiked hair, purposefully ghastly pale with black lips. You could hear the muffled sound of Siouxsie Sioux and the Banshees playing at top volume as her head bounced to the beat, her black high tops kicking at the seat below you. You had your sketchpad out, trying to capture the stiff movement of her hair with the graphite piece clutched in your hand.

Samantha turned to look at you with a smile “You get it right yet?” she asked. She could see the annoyance in your face as you rubbed at the drawing, trying to smudge the stray hairs trying to escape the harsh gelling she’d done that morning. Just like your drawing, you suspecting that she’d been unable to get it to do exactly as she wanted.

“It’s getting there, it’s not moving right yet…” you muttered, pulling your lip into your teeth, chewing hard on the skin.

“You have like, four of me as is, I think you’ll survive if it isn’t perfect.” Samantha chuckled, pulling her headset down around her neck, twisting her long strand of pearls around her index finger.

“And I like this one best, your hair is moving so interestingly today…” you swiped at the page, pulling the eraser gum out of the coils and rubbing out the mistake you’d made, adding more shake to the tips of the centre point.

“Besides,” you chuckled “I’m not gonna have the time to get any good sketches of you with post-its in your hair this year.” Usually, you and Samantha would try to take one class together a year, but she had to switch her English class to first semester so she could snag a gym credit to train for potential college reps. She wanted to be a Wellesley girl and get a scholarship for soccer and she needed to be a top performance to get one.

You sighed, turning away from her. “I still hate that Mr. Lawrence insists on group work…” you muttered. You understood her decision, but you felt a bit nervous about being on your own. You’d gone to school with the same kids for your whole life, but being on your own with no one to depend on socially for a whole semester scared you.

Samantha wrapped an arm around your shoulders “You’ll be fine, you know that he usually assigns partners anyway.” She said, rubbing your bare skin gently.

“I know I just really don’t want to get stuck with some nitwit.” You replied. On cue, the bell blared from the outdoor speakers and you closed up your notebook, sliding your graphite and eraser gum into the coils and shoving it into your backpack, stringing it around your shoulders.

Mr. Lawrence’s hair had gone white long before he’d begun to show to process of aging on his face. His only wrinkles were from tension on his forehead and around his mouth.  His white hair was a sort of burst of smoke around his head, always puffed up around his head and never fully settled into a style. You smiled when you walked into his classroom, taking a seat in the far back corner. You’d already gotten a sketch of his puffy cloud hair, so you left your notebook closed.  The rest of the class trickled in, clumped in their little groups and chattering loudly, taking up the seats around you. Nobody paid much attention to you, which didn’t bother you as much as it used to. It still left a weird feeling in the pit of your stomach. You wished that you had your headset, so you could block out the sound from your peers.

You hoped that the seat next to you would stay empty, that people would avoid you and let you sit quietly. It hadn’t before the break, but the room had been set up in little table groups of four. Now, the room was set up in three rows, two desks pushed next to each other all the way down. Mr. Lawrence had already had to yell twice for people to not move the desks, a sign of little cliques forming. Vicki Clarke had tried to pull the desk next to you over to turn the end of the middle row into a fire hazard, causing Mr. Lawrence to yell out for a third time. Vicki rolled her eyes, but released the desk, taking the desk next to the free one, leaving a clear space between her and you. You didn’t mind; Vicki always smelt like artificial apples, from the cheap body spray she slathered herself in at her locker and the scent gave you a headache.

Tina Martins practically ran to Vicki as the bell rang out, immediately calling to Vicki “Move that desk over!”

Mr. Lawrence rolled his eyes “Miss Martins we are not moving any desks in this room. Take a seat.” He announced. Tina’s shoulders sunk, but she obeyed without an argument, taking the seat to Vicki’s right. Then, the reason for all the commotion walked in, late slip in hand.

Steve ‘The Hair’ Harrington was still something to talk about, even after being horrifically dumped by Nancy Wheeler, he was still a hot object around the school, especially for girls burned by the newest small town hottie Billy Hargrove. Vicki and Tina were two primed recent burn victims, Tina having tried and tragically failed to get Billy’s attention at her own house party and Vicki being the first ‘hump and dump’ victim of the notorious man whore. Steve’s sad boy behaviour had attracted the attention of many bleeding hearts throughout the school, letting themselves get their hearts drained by his succubus heartache. And here he was, puffed up like a robin, his bright red member’s only jacket mimicking the red breast on the bird, his hair perfectly coiffed and glinting in the florescent lights. Heartbreak had done his ego good, teaching him that girls were a dime a dozen if you were hot and sad. The concept of preying on vulnerable girls made you sick to your stomach.

Steve handed his late slip off to Mr. Lawrence and he stamped it with the date punch he kept on his desk. “Welcome Mr. Harrington, please take a seat so we can begin.” He said, his rectangular glasses sliding off his nose as he spoke.

Suddenly, the energy in the room changed. It was then that you realized the class was mostly girls and every single girl in the room was staring at Steve. It was obvious to you in an instant: they wanted Steve to sit next to them and they were all out of luck, sat next to friends or other girls desperate for the same attention. The bargaining began, girls whispering to the person next to them to move, sliding cool erasers or lipsticks over onto the other desk, peace offerings they hoped someone would take. Mr. Lawrence’s classroom had fallen to jailhouse rules and you sat wondering when the first person would pull their shank. No one moved as Steve made his way to the back of the class. Then, another thing became clear-you were the only person with a free desk next to them. Vicki waved shyly to Steve as he took the seat and you tried to disappear. The whole room’s eyes were now on you and unlike Steve you absolutely hated it. You wanted to disappear. Now, you were enemy number one to every girl in the room.

“Alright, let’s begin then, yes?” Mr. Lawrence clapped once and commenced the lesson “Welcome to your last two months of English! I’m passing around the breakdown for your final assignment and copies of our last reading for the course, Emily Bronte’s Wuthering Heights.” The class groaned. You’d been hoping for a lighter, more modern read, something at least from that century. But you knew that Mr. Lawrence loved a classic and had to follow the suggested readings for your grade dictating by the state. You took your tattered copy and wordlessly handed the pile off to Steve, who didn’t notice that it had landed on his desk until Vicki pointed it out with a giggle.

“Now, everyone turn to their desk mate. He or she will be your editor and writing partner for the final essay of the year!” your heart dropped. You were stuck with Steve. And he was an idiot. Every stupid thing you’d heard uttered from a classmate’s mouth had always been from his. He once asked who the US was fighting in World War two. He spent one class arguing with a teacher that Beth didn’t die in Little Women, not believing it even when the teacher sourced the exact page when Alcott revealed it. He once failed a health assignment because he mixed up the names for the parts of the male and female. Literally mixed them up, your seventh grade health teacher had provided them for the worksheets and told the class to cut the out and glue them on and he mixed up all the words into a pile. He was an idiot!

Tina’s hand shot up fast and Mr. Lawrence called on her. “Mr. Lawrence, can we be a threesome with Steve?” She asked loudly, smirking over at you. Vicki giggled at the word ‘threesome’, hands clutched over her mouth.

“But then what will Y/N do? She won’t have a partner.” Mr. Lawrence flashed you a small smile and you just about threw up. This was all too much for you, too much attention, too many people looking at you.

You raised your hand timidly “I’ll be fine if that’s what they want to do. I don’t mind working on my own…” you said, your eyes locked on the course breakdown.

“See, Y/N can handle herself.” Tina said. If you knew Tina to be anything other than mean and condescending, you would’ve taken that as a compliment.

“I want every student to have work edited and reviewed by a classmate before I look at it. I’m sorry, but I’m not making exceptions to the rule. If your desk mate wants to switch with Steve, then that’s another thing entirely, but you cannot be a group of three.” Mr. Lawrence laid down the law on that and moved on with the lesson. While Tina and Vicki attempt to convince one another to switch seats and let the other have Steve, neither would budge and Steve seemed utterly uninterested in their spat. To be fair, he didn’t seem interested in the lesson either. He had taken to drawing on the surface of his desk, scratching his initials into the wood.

“Now, for your first assignment back, I’d like you to write me a piece on your spring break. Nothing fancy, just one page typed. We’ll write the first draft today and exchange it with our partners to be edited and rewritten for Friday.” He announced “When you’re done, read chapters one through three of Wuthering Heights.”

With that, the semester had begun again and everyone went to work. Voices took over the room, people chattering around you. You felt a pair of eyes on you, but you flipped open your binder to a clean sheet of paper and began writing out your simple description of your break. You knew that Mr. Lawrence didn’t actually care about what you had done or had to say, only that you’d done the work and had proof of editing for it. This was a practise for the main event. Still, you could make a page out of art classes and driving to Carmel with Samantha to see some random band in the basement of a dive bar. You could even make it interesting for him. But, something still made your stomach churn. You didn’t want Harrington looking at your writing. You didn’t consider yourself the next Hemingway, but you could write an essay. What worried you wasn’t being told that you were wrong. It was letting him into your mind at all. You didn’t know Steve and he didn’t know you, what if he didn’t understand you? He wouldn’t understand you.

You looked up from your work to see Steve looking blankly at you. You met his eye, raising your brow at him. He looked away fast. You didn’t know what it was about, your hands came up to your face, wiping at your cheeks and mouth. Maybe there was something on your face. Maybe your hair looked silly. Maybe he was making fun of you. That had to be it. He was making fun of you. Vicki and Tina were always bugging you and Samantha, maybe he was joining in. It wasn’t your fault that Mr. Lawrence had forced you two to be partners. You pulled your body away from his, curling into yourself.

When the bell rang, you pulled your work into your bag, making a break for the door. You had your free period next and were desperate to finish your drawing of Samantha. You didn’t need to have her in front of you to catch the right details; you’d drawn her a million times.

You had barely made it into the hallway when Steve grabbed your arm, pulling you back with a cocky grin “Whoa, slow your roll there kiddo,” he chuckled. Your skin prickled under his hand and you wanted nothing more than to disappear. You stopped dead in your tracks, pulling away from his hand carefully.

“So, how’re we doing this?” he asked, his attention moving from you to the yelp of Tommy Hanson. You didn’t need to look to know that Carol Perkins was beating him with her bag again. That was a weekly occurrence.

“Write your stuff and hand it off to me in class. I’ll edit anything up till forty-eight hours before it’s due. I’ll give you my stuff when you give me yours.” You said quickly, crossing your arms tightly over your chest.

“Sounds cool,” Another cry from Tommy, this one more directed at Steve, drew his attention fully “Alright, I’m coming Hanson! See ya around.” He directed the farewell to you, bounding off towards the source of the sound. Even when his presence was gone, you still felt his fingertips on your arm.

Samantha threw her arm around your shoulders, rebooting your systems again. “Hey, what was that about?” she asked, leading you away from Mr. Lawrence’s classroom and towards the gym, her next destination.

“That was because you fucked me over.” You sighed. It was going to be a long month.