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justenjoythegossip · 4 months

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Would it be more “acceptable” if Chris & Abba were exclusively PR?

Chris’ performative political activism

Whether Chris and Abba are a real legitimate couple with a PR spin or exclusively PR, Chris’ political activism has proved to be totally performative. It’s one thing to fight for equality and injustice when it is beneficial to your image, it’s another to do it when voicing that opinion can be costly. Look at Melissa Barrera who expressed her opinion, stuck to her guts and lost the role she is most famous for. Look at Brendan Fraser who refused to stay silent and paid such a heavy price after speaking out on his being sexually assaulted. It took him years to come back and finally take home a much deserved Oscar for his acclaimed performance in the Whale.

Chris’ persona and brand were utterly destroyed when he was linked to that fat-shaming racist antisemitic Nazi sympathizing girl. The most aggravating part of this PR shitshow is that by accepting to be officially in a “RS” and then be “married” to her, he has helped put her in the spotlight, which was his first mistake. Look at Dylan O’Brien who is in a real relationship with someone extremely problematic as well. They are rather discreet. If Chris and Abba had behaved like a real private couple, if Abba would have stayed in the shadow, then the backlash would have been kept to a minimum. Also by agreeing to this, Chris helped clean her image. Knowing what she has shown to the world publicly, it’s all the more egregious to see the media portraying her as this smart talented great humanitarian who speaks 5 languages and who has perfect eyebrows. The gaslighting is unbearable.

Of course, Chris has famously said that the industry makes you do things that you don’t want to do. But it is an excuse. It’s a rationalization. The truth is that he had a choice. For sure the two options he was offered probably sucked but he still had a choice. Nobody forced this on him. And he knew the optics were terrible. That’s why he didn’t come back to Twitter, that’s why he took so much distance from his political project ASP. It would have been too hypocritical to be vocal and to be lecturing people when he, himself, was connected to someone that represents what he is allegedly fighting against.

When he did that infamous asp chat about racism and antisemitism, it wasn’t random. It was very likely a test to monitor the reaction of his fans. This is probably why they left all those negative comments. They wanted to know if Chris had been forgiven...

If their “RS/marriage” was exclusively PR, would that absolve him somehow?

Certain mods have expressed the opinion that if Chris and Abba were a real legitimate couple, it would be much worse and then they couldn’t support Chris anymore. I don’t mean to judge or criticize anyone’s opinion by the way, especially since I think some of those mods are good, well-intentioned people and I love reading their take on things but I am just trying to ask questions here.

What is implied here is that it’s ok and preferable to compromise yourself if it’s meant for your career. And it’s true that we are taught from the earliest age that we have to succeed. Whatever the cost may be. We must have friends, have a career, have money, have a family, have a house… So much emphasis on having and so little on being. This is the darker side of the American dream, it puts way too much importance on money and success. And if you can’t achieve those goals then you are considered to be worthless. Nihilism starts right there. If you are nothing, it’s a lot easier to give up on your morals and ethics…

To get back to Chris. Yes he’s had an amazing career, the kind of career most actors would kill for. But it’s easy to relate to being terrified to lose what you have and what you have always wanted. I guess the desperation must be unbearable if you have defined yourself by your professional success and you see that things start slipping away from you. And by his looks and demeanor, people can tell he has struggled with it. Although it might be an act of course. But I choose to believe that it’s genuine and that he really feels guilty about it.

But wouldn’t love make this situation more “acceptable”?

If Chris and Abba were exclusively PR, then it would signify that Chris compromised himself and his beliefs for his career, for roles, for money and for power.

But wouldn’t it be actually “preferable” and “more acceptable” to compromise yourself out of love?

Love can be so powerful and nonsensical that certain people have lost their ways because of it. People have betrayed their partners or spouses, some have abandoned their own children because of it. Heck, people have even killed out of passion. And we sometimes free those people in a court of law when a jury decides that the criminal was so blinded by love and passion that they were unable to distinguish right from wrong. We call it temporary insanity!

If Chris had genuinely fallen in love with Abba (I don’t believe it by the way) to the point of being blind to her problematic stuff, would that be really worse or wouldn’t that serve as more mitigating circumstances? I am merely asking a question: compromising yourself for money and roles is it better than compromising yourself out of love? Did we actually become too cynical? Too materialistic?

Chris and his treatment of Abba and how it is reflective of our society…

Regardless of what we might think of Abba (and for sure we don’t have a good opinion of her), Chris has treated her very poorly. And this doesn’t reflect well on him.

Indeed he has done the absolute bare minimum to sell this, has never even said her name once, he has acted all ashamed most times she was nearby, has thrown shade (see the GQ interview where he implied she was judgmental), he has kept repeating how much he likes to be alone and how his dog is his true soulmate. He even said while allegedly being with her that he was looking for a partner to spend the rest of his life with. Ouch!

Of course, people who know about her problematic stuff will have trouble having any kind of empathy for her but that doesn’t make it ok.

Chris has agreed to this PR shitshow so tacitly he has accepted that Abba is good enough for these PR games and he has accepted to use her. So he should treat her with a minimum of respect. Otherwise he shouldn’t have gone through with it in the first place.

And it’s very symptomatic of our society these days. With the propaganda pushed by the mass media, we are taught that it’s ok to hate on people as long as they are horrible human beings. And similarly we have seen so many mods troll and comment on Abba‘s appearance as if it was even relevant. Just because someone is horrible, it doesn’t give you a license to behave the same way. Otherwise you become the very same thing you are criticizing.

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aniamra · 6 months

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Traits that make people terrible moderators

These are just some observations I've made being a moderator in multiple settings, in wonderful teams and bad teams, as well as being in communities that have absolutely festered due to poor moderation. Many of these traits are things you can identify before the person is even appointed a moderator in the first place. (Most of this applies to large-scale servers and/or communities, and isn't always applicable to small and/or personal servers. I am not writing some sort rule book absolutely everyone has to follow, these are just traits that would not make the mod-team cut, to me, you don't have to agree with me.)

Having any hesitation with confrontation. (being a moderator requires confrontation, this is not negotiable. if the idea of confronting difficult people gives you anxiety or panic attacks, don't apply to be a moderator)

Being too eager to confront and/or unable to use tact/kindness when confronting. (those that seek confrontation should not be moderators)

Gets personally offended easily. (any mod that is constantly getting into fights with other users because of perceived slights, will make the whole community feel unable to talk to the mod team)

Is incapable of repairative reading. (moderators need to be capable of reading the best out of someone and not jumping to negative conclusions)

Lacking in compassion. (using tact and kindness leads to faster, more permanent, diffusion of conflicts)

Views any confrontation as a personal attack. (being a moderator means getting a lot of questions, suggestions, and well-meaning 'confrontation' and needs to be met without hostility. ps: tact and firmness are not the same as hostility)

Cares more about their own wants than the server. This can manifest in the form of, in the case of a server/community created for a single individual, ignoring comforts/needs of the individual; in the case of a collective community, being unwilling to negotiate or compromise with the rest or the community/team. Just any abuse of power in general.

Likes to control others. (moderation is about cohesive harmony for a shared goal, not control)

Incapable of being objective and applying the same rules appropriately to all users. (those that expect exceptions for their friends or people they want to impress, or express any other bias of application of the rules, should not be moderators)

Incapable of following the rules, themselves. (if someone wasn't following the rules before they became a mod, it won't change when they do become a mod)

Wants to be a mod for the social collateral, not because they want the community to run smoothly. (those that are constantly vying for attention and validation, that then apply for being a mod, should not be made mods)

Lacks humility. (knowing when to admit you're wrong or have overstepped, is important to being a good moderator)

Lacks the self-awareness of knowing when to put something down and walk away. (as a moderator, self-moderation is a vital skill that must be learned to be able to moderate others)

Refuses to communicate directly and clearly in any given circumstance. (vague communication is bad moderation, any user being approached by a mod should know exactly what they did wrong, and what is expected for future change)

Is prone to soap-boxing/lecturing instead of being concise. (this goes back to communicating clearly and directly; being overly verbose and preachy can make it difficult to understand. You need to give room to allow the member you are confronting to talk and ask questions.)

Incapable of deferring to others with grace where appropriate. (knowing when you're not the best mod for the job, when you're lacking in information, when your ideas just won't work, or when you're compromised is important. and knowing how to properly delicate tasks is a Must for an admin)

#internet #moderation #discord servers

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azuremist · 10 months

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Alterhumanity and Autism (Script)

During my panel at this year's Othercon, I said that I would publicly post my panel's script, and my survey's results onto my tumblr, for easy archival purposes! (There is no way to submit Google Docs to archive.org that I'm aware of...)

This is the panel's script! What I said before the QnA part of the panel. Once the panel recording is uploaded, I'll reblog with the link to it, as well! The results for the survey will also be posted to this account shortly.

Here is the blurb that I originally wrote for the panel, on the schedule:

"This panel aims to explore the relationship between autism and alterhumanity, by looking at the history, the modern autistic community and what real alterhumans have to say on the topic. Why it is that neurodivergency is seemingly so common in the alterhuman community? Is it correlation, causation, or perhaps something in between?"

And, below is the script itself!

Hi, everyone! I am so excited to be speaking at Othercon this year and I hope everyone else is enjoying the 'con so far. My name is Azure! You may also call me Bede, as I answer to both. I like he/him, she/her and bun/buns pronouns, and I am a multitude of things! I am a demon (a fallen angel if you wanna get technical), and my main fictotype is, you'll never guess who based off my names, Bede from Pokemon. Shoutout to any Pokemonkin listening. I've been active in the alterhuman community for around 5 years now, and was the head and sole mod of ‘From Fictionkind’, which is a zine released in 2022, aiming to explore the experiences of those who have a fiction-based identity. If you are interested, you can download it here. (Send link)

I am a grab bag of disorders and disabilities, most of which I won't list, but what is relevant to this panel is that I am, in fact, autistic. Not only that, but I have done, by all metrics, way too much research into autism, and I am an autistic activist!

To preface: although this panel is going to specifically namedrop and talk about autism a lot, I am sure that a lot of different beings can relate to what I am going to talk about today. Not just other neurodivergencies and disabilities, either. Much of what I am going to be talking about today could resonate with any oppressed being's experiences. I welcome all discussion about the similarities of different experiences with open arms!

But, for the sake of transparency, I am not very good at talking off the cuff. So I am going to spend the bulk of this panel reading from a pre-prepared script. If anyone is interested in a transcript, it is available on Google Docs for viewing! I will send it in the panel chat right now, so that anyone who needs to may read along, for word-processing purposes. (Send link) This also means that I am not going to be looking at the chat a whole lot, so if there's something you'd particularly like for me to see, I encourage you to hold it until the end so that I can be sure to see it and give it the thought and recognition that it deserves. All this being said, I still will be looking at the chat occasionally.

To prepare for this panel, I took a survey polling autistic alterhumans, which was taking responses from March 7th to July 1st, so around 4 months. I was hoping for about maybe 90 participants, but that number was blown out of the water with over 500 responses!! I will be going over those results later on in the panel, and will also be referencing the anonymous freeform responses.

The very last point of my preamble here is to warn that this panel may not be suitable for all audiences. This lecture contains extended discussion of ableism, and, while I try to keep the mentions brief, there will be specific talk of disabled folks, including children, being hurt. If you're unable to handle that at this time, that is absolutely fine. Take care of yourself and have a great con!

This panel aims to explore the relationship between autism and alterhumanity, by looking at the history, the modern autistic community and what real alterhumans have to say on the topic. I hope to, perhaps not explain, but look into why it is that neurodivergency is seemingly so common in the alterhuman community, and whether it's because of correlation, causation, or perhaps something in between.

Now, let's start off with a question and feel free to try and guess: What do fairies, aliens, and crystals all have in common? Do we have any guesses?

The correct answer is that all 3 of these things have been used to try and claim autistic children are nonhuman!

Let's get into the specifics, starting from the top with fairies.

The changeling is a form of fairy found in European folklore. Also referred to as an "oaf" historically, a changeling is a fairy that is left in the place of an identical human child, when they are stolen away by other fairies. This is to say, parents believed that their human child was being replaced by an identical fairy child. There were multiple tricks that were thought to fend this off. When you believe you already have a changeling, though... There were less ways to go about that. Historical records and tales about changelings unfortunately imply that the solution chosen for a changeling child was often times infanticide.

Many modern psychologists now believe that most tales of changelings developed in an attempt to explain disabled children. This includes, but is not limited to, deformities, Down syndrome, Williams syndrome, cerebral palsy, and, of course, autism. The fact that boys are more often born with birth defects lines up with the touted belief that boys were more likely to be taken by fairies.

Furthermore, see "regressive autism". This so-called phenomena occurs when a child appears to develop, quote-unquote, "normally", until they start showing symptoms of autism in their later years. Now, what actually happens in these cases is that they never noticed their child's autistic traits until those later years. But the fact that there is still a name for this sudden perceived shift in an autistic child shows the sheer amount of cases there are like this, even today. Now, imagine how bad it was hundreds of years ago, before we even had a word for autism. This "sudden shift" perspective very much parallels the supposed markings of your child being replaced by a changeling.

Second verse, same as the first: aliens. Although the term "starseed" has been picked up in the alterhuman community as a way to describe one's self as an alien, "starseeds", or "star children", didn't originate in the alterhuman community. Their existence is a theory put forth by Brad Seiger in his 1976 book, titled "Gods of Aquarius". It posits that some humans originated as extraterrestrials, and arrived on Earth through either birth or by taking over an existent human body.

Generally agreed-upon signs that you or someone you love is a starseed, according to believers, include that person feeling like they don't belong, being hyperempathetic (which is a sign of autism, despite what the stereotypes would have you believe), introversion, and... Actually, I'm going to quote this in its entirety. In "What Is A Starseed & 50 Clear Signs You Are One", published by The Spirit Nomad, the first listed sign is, quote, "You are highly sensitive. You easily feel overwhelmed and drained when you are in a place with many people and with intense stimuli – like shopping malls, clubs, and networking events. You might also be sensitive to stimulants like coffee, alcohol and even dark chocolate." Endquote.

You think I'm joking about these things just listing autism symptoms. I'm not!

Finally... Crystals. Crystal children and indigo children are both believed to be sort of the next step in scientific evolution, according to New Age circles. More specifically, crystal children are the newest generation, while indigo children were the first wave, from around the 70s to the 90s. I'll just be calling both of these 'waves' crystal children for the sake of simplicity, but know that they are just two waves of the same thing. Crystal children are believed to possess special or supernatural abilities, such as telepathy. Autistic children having telepathy, as we all know, is the plot of Mob Psycho 100.

Signs that your child is a crystal child include high empathy, being perceived as 'strange' by others or intelligent for their age (see the autistic gifted kid phenomenon), and being sensitive to the point of fussing in crowded spaces. It's also said that crystal children may struggle in socially conventional schools, because of their dislike of rigid authority, being smarter than their teachers, and their lack of response to guilt, fear, or manipulation-based discipline. (Read: indirect communication.)

It is actually a noted phenomenon that many parents, when confronted with a diagnosis like a learning disability, ADHD, or autism, will alternatively label their child as a crystal child. Autism researcher Mitzi Waltz noted this phenomenon, and spoke about it in a 2009 issue of The Journal of Religion, Disability & Health. He suggests that parents recategorize autistic symptoms as telepathic powers to attempt to reconceptualize these autistic traits as a part of a more conventionally positive identity. He also puts into words why this can be harmful, stating that parents could refuse to acknowledge their child's impairments, refuse accommodations, and, quote, "transmit belief systems to the child that are self-aggrandizing, confusing, or potentially frightening." Endquote.

Believe it or not, there are actually MORE examples of myths or conspiracy theories that attempt to explain autistic children as nonhuman. But, I will leave it at those three.

Let's take a brief look into modern media now. Specifically, the "autistic-coded robot" trope. A lot of times, when humans try to write robots, or AI or such, they think that they can just take all essential things that make humanity what it is, and take away a few things. Make them not express empathy, they don't get nonliteral phrases, they obviously speak in monotone. We could sprinkle in a little bit of feeling out of place with humanity for flavor aaaand it's autistic. Your robot is autistic. To name some examples of this trope, think Data from Star Trek, or Zane from Ninjago.

This trope is more or less echoed, beat for beat, with the autistic-coded alien trope. Examples of this flavor of the trope include Peridot from Steven Universe, Spock from Star Trek, or, and I'm sorry for anyone who I'm about to violently throw back into 2016 with this, Keith from Voltron.

Because nonhumanity is so often linked to autistic beings by the culture around us, desiring to be nonhuman or connecting with nonhumanity is now a recognized part of autistic culture. We often feel out of place in neurotypical society. Join autistic spaces, and you’ll see jokes like, “What kind of nonhuman did you think you were as a kid?” (In case you’re wondering, the answer is werewolf for me.) Growing up thinking that the reason behind your autistic traits is because you are secretly nonhuman is a common experience. Jokes about desiring a tail and to purr often go viral within autistic spaces, because they are forms of natural and nonverbal communication that shows those around us that we are happy. The topic of nonhumanity within autistic culture is also talked about within professional settings, such as in Kim Duff’s speech, “The Role of Changeling Lore in Autistic Culture”, at the 1999 Autreat conference of Autism Network International.

There is also discussion of how autistic beings oftentimes connect with animals better than with humans. For example, Temple Grandin is an autistic animal behavioralist who has written extensively on how her being autistic helps her understand how animals feel. For example, she speaks in 2004’s, “Animals in Translation: Using the Mysteries of Autism to Decode Animal Behavior”, and in 1997’s “Thinking the Way Animals Do: Unique Insights from a Person with a Singular Understanding”.

In more modern times, we have the 2022 article, “How Autism Connects Me With Animals”, in which Emily Moran Barwick, writes, quote, “I knew how profoundly frustrating, isolating and demoralizing it was to be unable to convey what I wanted to convey. I knew how it felt to never be truly understood. And it broke my heart thinking of what non-human animals were experiencing at the hands of humans; that no matter how desperately and clearly they communicated their terror and pain, they were ignored and discounted.” Endquote.

All of these connections have led to the creation of subcultures created in an attempt to reclaim the dehumanization put onto us. To name one example, voidpunk is a subculture created by tumblr user arotaro in the 2010s, and more or less hinges on this idea. Key points of this subculture include the rejection of the norm, embracing nonhumanity, and comfort in the unknown. In the words of it’s creator, quote, “It’s not the same as otherkin because it’s not really like, “Ah yes, I am a cat/dragon/wolf/that one guy from Homestuck/etc.”, it’s not necessarily something specific, and it’s not necessarily literally believing you’re something other than human. It’s, well, punk. Society puts out a lot of messages about What It Means To Be Human (trademark) that can make a lot of people who don’t completely fit the bill feel lost, broken, alone, or like they’re doing something wrong; Voidpunk is about taking that message of “you’re not human”, making it your own, and throwing it back in society’s face. You say I’m not human? Sure, ok. That’s chill. Why does being Human (trademark) have to be a goal to aspire to anyway? What’s so great about humanity?” Endquote. She then goes on to specifically namedrop neurodivergents as one of the target audiences for the subculture, as well. She also later answers an ask to clarify, quote, “Someone who doesn’t face dehumanization cannot be voidpunk.” Endquote.

So, where does all of this information intersect with the notable number of autistic alterhumans? Well, that’s just the question, isn’t it? Is it possible that alterhuman identity may correlate with those who have identities and neurotypes which are demonized by society? After all, queer beings are common within alterhuman spaces, too. And, if there is a correlation, is there causation there, as well? There are already some terms coined to describe when alterhuman identity is caused or influenced by autistic traits; such as ‘otherspin’, a term for when one’s alterhuman identity is caused / influenced by special interests. Furthermore, ‘altervexo’ attempts to describe identifying as alterhuman out of spite for the dehumanization one has faced. However, to my knowledge, no term has been made or extensive talks had about, voluntary or nonvoluntary, alterhuman identity, as possibly having origins within dehumanization.

So, I set out to have that conversation. As stated at the start of this panel, I ran a survey, mostly promoted on tumblr, from March 7th to July 1st, posing questions to the autistic alterhuman community about their personal experiences, which got over 500 responses! 537, to be exact. I’d like to share the results of this survey with you now. The raw data collected is available here. (Send link) I will also be posting both the raw data, and the script for this panel, to my tumblr, @azuremist, but that’s mostly for easy archival purposes. Now, it’s NUMBERS TIME, baby!

I asked everyone to indicate if they agreed or disagreed with the statements I made. For the statement, “I believe that my autism has influenced my alterhumanity in some way, shape, or form,” 92% of those who took my survey agreed, and 8% disagreed, which is a WILD split. Far beyond notable.

For the statement, “I feel like the way that autistic beings are seen by society has influenced my alterhumanity”, the split is a bit more even, with 72.4% agreeing, and 27.6% disagreeing.

This means that, of those who I polled who agreed that autism influenced their alterhumanity, 78.6% (rounding down) also agreed that the way autistic beings are viewed in society influenced their alterhumanity. This is a rate a bit over 3 in every 4.

This next question is one of the things that I asked more out of personal curiosity, which is, whether or not they feel more safe to be openly autistic in alterhuman spaces, when compared to other community spaces. Of those polled, 89.4% agreed, and 10.6% disagreed, which makes me quite happy! One anonymous being commented, quote, “I generally find that most alterhuman spaces are a lot more accepting of autistic beings than wider society if that makes sense? Going into an alterhuman space, I'm never concerned that it may not be safe or accessible for me.” Endquote. Someone else wrote in that they could testify to the opposite being true, as well; autistic spaces, in their experience, had a higher likelihood of being accepting of alterhuman identities. However, one being who answered ‘no’ to this question stated that they avoid alterhuman spaces for things related to this subject. They list as an example, quote, “Like the refusal of tone tags? I understand not wanting them to be used for you but banning them from the space all together? And also a lot of spaces, despite being accepting of autistic beings, still find a way to hate those beings for being autistic.” Making community spaces safe for autistic beings is an ongoing learning process for everyone involved. So please make sure to consult your local autistic advocate to make sure everything is accessible for those of all neurotypes.

For the next questions, I asked about everyone’s specific experience with alterhumanity. Another question that I asked, mostly out of curiosity, is, “Would you consider alterhumanity, as a subject, a special interest?” 64.8% of respondents answered ‘no’, and 35.2% answered ‘yes’.

The next question, though, is really quite interesting to me. It asks, “If you have any kintypes which originate from a piece of media: Would you consider that kintype's source material a special interest?” 69% of respondents (nice) answered ‘yes’, and 31% answered ‘no’. That’s a pretty close percentage to the question about alterhumanity as a special interest, but with the answers flipped. Indeed, many times in the section where I invite others to talk about their experience, there are respondents specifically namedropping that they believe their special interests contribute to their alterhumanity. Some, but not all, of these instances include a space conceptkin who has space as a special interest, two catkin, with one having Warrior Cats as a past special interest, and the other, cats in general as one, and someone who specifically wrote, quote, “I also feel as though my special interests in some medias have influenced the fact that I identify with both real and fictional species. For example, I have a large number of original characters who are demons and I feel like my special interest in them may have led me down the path of discovering myself as demonkin.” When discussing the subject of autism influencing alterhumanity, special interests were easily the thing that came up the most, other than how autistic beings are seen by neurotypical society.

The final multiple choice question I had asked, “If you have a nonhuman kintype of any kind: Do you experience species dysphoria and/or euphoria?” To this, 85.9% answered ‘yes’, and 14.1% answered ‘no’.

We can compare this to a survey not aimed at autistic alterhumans; specifically, the ‘Alterhumanity and Gender Survey’, as conducted by Eli, at pantomorph on tumblr. These results were posted on July 22nd of 2019, and reported that, in response to the question, “Do you experience species dysphoria?”, 4.9% answered ‘I used to,’ 8.9% answered ‘unsure’, 22.7% answered ‘no’, 36% answered ‘sometimes’ and 27.6% answered ‘yes’. Adding up the percentages of ‘I used to’, ‘sometimes’ and ‘yes’, we get 68.5% of respondents who are certain that they have, at some point, experienced species dysphoria.

This means that, according to these surveys, autistic alterhumans appear to have a higher chance of experiencing species dysphoria, with a 17.5% difference. Though, keep in mind, I included euphoria in my question, and Eli did not. This would certainly require more data to confirm, however, this at least would warrant further polling, in my opinion.

All of this talk about autistic beings and species dysphoria may have you thinking about the fact that autistic beings are statistically more likely to identify as transgender, with some estimates stating that transgender individuals are up to 6 times more likely to be autistic than cisgender individuals! This is because gender is stupid, and autistic folks are not. Multiple respondents to the survey brought this point up. One being specifically wrote in, quote, “Statistically, autistic folks are more likely to know they're trans than allistics, and I support the theory that that's got something to do with autistic beings seeing things without the lens of social cues and societal pressures, including more awareness of who we are and how we see ourselves. … Society is like, "You should be like this," and autistics are like, "But why? It doesn't really make sense, plus I don't fit in to those standards anyway, so why not choose my own path in life?"” Endquote. I definitely agree that the reason so many autistic folks identify as transgender may be similar to, or the same, reason that autistic folks seem to be more likely to be alterhuman.

Hello to all trans autistic alterhumans listening! Call that a triple threat.

Now, the final question that I asked. I listed multiple different alterhuman identities, and asked everyone to indicate which, if any, of the provided labels that they identify with. And, indeed, my hypothesis when going into this question was proven correct. Of the terms that I provided, it was “nonhuman” that most autistic alterhumans identified with specifically, with 74.9% of respondents identifying as nonhuman. Other popular answers to this question included ‘therian’, with 57.5%, and fictionkin with a nonhuman fictional character. Indeed, I did put two separate options for fictionkin, where they could indicate if their fictional kintype was human or not. 45.1% of respondents had a nonhuman fictotype, and 41.2% of respondents had a human fictotype. So, autistic fictionkin appear to have around a 9% (rounding down) higher likelihood to identify with nonhuman fictional characters. Unfortunately, I could not find another survey to compare this statistic against, but it is a statistic we have now, nonetheless.

Furthermore, I specifically listed 3 common kintypes that have been associated with autistic beings, as previously discussed: fairies, aliens, and robots / technology. Of these, techkin was easily the most popular, with 19.9% of respondents identifying as such. Alienkin and fairykin were close in numbers, with 11.2% identifying as alienkin, and 11.9% identifying as fairykin. On the subject of being robotkin, one being wrote, quote, “I do not on a literal, physical level believe I’m a robot, however, tropes related to robots and the way they behave and are treated feel analogous to my own lived experiences, so in some ways it feels as though I experience my life as a robot would.” Endquote.

Which segways nicely into the final question, which is the filled in responses. For this question, I prompted, “If you have anything you'd like to add, please tell me about your experiences involving your alterhumanity and autism.”

Many took the chance to speak on if they felt like their autism and alterhumanity were connected. As previously mentioned, lots of folks mentioned special interests as a factor. Lots of folks also said that they felt the two were connected, but couldn’t explain how, with a common sentiment being that it is a ‘chicken or the egg’ situation. Two different beings whose kintypes are their past lives wrote in, and both said that a hypothetical allistic version of them wouldn’t be able to get memories as easily. Multiple beings also wrote that they felt like the awakening process was made easier due to their autism. They were so used to seeing themselves as different from everybody else, and not understanding social cues, that they were more willing to take on, quote-unquote, “weird” solutions as the source of their feelings. Other commonly-mentioned points include dehumanization as a reason for alterhumanity, autistic traits being seen as similar to animalistic traits, and the possibly-related high rate of autistic pagans and witches.

Something that I didn’t expect going in, but perhaps should have, is the amount of autistic alterbeings who wrote about their struggle to find words to describe themselves. One ghostkin wrote they felt like their nonconformity to their kintype’s typical associated traits (like darkness, doom and gloom, et cetera) was due to their autism, but that they felt they didn’t belong with other ghostkin because of it. And a LOT of folks wrote in saying that they had a lot of trouble figuring out what terminology to use, especially regarding the ever-dreaded ‘identify with’ or ‘identify as’ question. One being wrote in that they see themself as psychological otherkin, but would be more accurately described as having a neurotype-based, or neurology-based, origin, due to their autism. However, this has caused some issues, as it is not seen as a, quote-unquote, ‘valid’ origin. Someone else describes having issues with this because the community does a lot of gatekeeping, and because it is easier to find beings complaining about words being misused than the actual use of words.

Now, there are some responses that I would like to read in full, or mostly in full, for your listening pleasure.

The first one is as follows. Quote. “When I was 6-ish, I started noticing that people treated me a bit like they treated our old Windows ‘98 Dell computer. The computer was inhuman when it worked (and praised for its distance from humanity! “Yes, it can play videos from the internet! Isn’t technology cool?”) and human when it broke down (“He’s getting overwhelmed, give us a sec.” “She’s blinking at me. I have no idea why this is such a difficult task.” “It ate my fucking CD. Stubborn POS.”). It’s a bit frustrating that my autistic traits are only praised when they make me convenient for others to use... I’m self-sufficient, I’m quiet, I’m a fast learner and a thorough researcher, so I rarely need to bother another person to complete the tasks I’m given. But because that’s all anyone ever seems to want me for... It’s a self-fulfilling cycle which is useful for the neurotypicals but exhausting for me, and when it ends in a burnout (inevitable) then I’m finally treated as human, but only because I’ve failed to be the computer they wanted. So I’m a computer when someone’s pleased with me, and I’m human when I’ve disappointed them. You can see why I might like the idea of being a PC more than a person. Also, when something’s wrong, computers’ error messages are both clearer and harder to ignore than a human’s requests for accommodation. This is a bit of a bummer, sorry. The upside is that I’m crazy good at data analysis now.” Endquote. This was excellently put, and I’m sure something that may resonate with autistic techkin.

Another write-in reads, quote, “One does not have to be autistic to be alterhuman or nonhuman, but one does have to be autistic to be my species. My species does not have human neurology, or allistic neurology. To be my species one must be autistic… though it’s more that my species has neurology which allistics will refer to as autism. I could not be my species if I wasn’t autistic.” Endquote. This is a very interesting response, and, to be honest, I sort of wish I knew what this being’s species was so that I could look more into it. It’s almost like a sort of alternate view of autistic nonhumans or autistic aliens, which is just lovely.

Then, there is this submission. Quote, “Diagnosed with autism at 15, explained a lot, I can't help but wonder - if I'd known, would I still dehumanize myself in the way I do? Other kids called me "cat boy" because when they would pick on me, I'd hiss at them. I don't know why. I think I just saw my cats do it and it was the only way I knew how to retaliate. But it just made them laugh. ... I stopped seeing myself as human a long time ago, more of an animal for people's amusement. ... But when I found out about otherkin, it was like suddenly this experience of mine I was certain I was alone in was shared. For some people it's spiritual, but even in our differences, our feelings were the same. The community taught me to love this nonhuman side of me, and they were understanding of my diagnosis. I didn't feel like an outcast there, they made me feel like it was something to cherish, and I do.” Endquote. Again, absolutely very well-said. Reclaiming and celebrating nonhumanity is, from what I’ve gathered, a large part of the autistic alterhuman experience, and this response phrased it just wonderfully.

Lastly, in regards to responses: shoutout to the one guy who said, “I just finished making my first ever tail, isn’t that sick?”, because yes, yes it is.

Thank you so much again to all the respondents to my survey!

And so, we have now reached the discussion section, which will last until my time runs out. This is where I will cease looking at a script, so please send anything you’d particularly like me to see now! Also, feel free to ask me questions, and I will answer to the best of my ability. Alternatively, tell me about your experiences, or just give general comments!

#othercon #othercon 2023 #alterhuman #essays #alterhuman community #autism #actuallyautistic #actually autistic #otherkin #azure does a thing

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catofadifferentcolor · 6 months

Text

Terrible Fic Idea #76: The Old Guard, but make it Harry Potter

I've read a lot of Master of Death!Harry Potter fics over the years and one thing that struck me is how so many of the canon MoD tropes - never aging, inability to stay dead - also can be said for The Old Guard's flavor of immortality. So I thought, why not?

Or: What if Harry Potter was raised by The Old Guard?

Just imagine it:

Six months after Merrick, on the night of 31 October, 2019, The Old Guard is woken by dreams of Voldemort killing the Potter Family.

The Guard are not unaware of magic - it's their running theory that something about their magic turning inwards at the time of their first death causes their immortality, rendering them near-squibs who cannot age or die - but they live very much on the fringes of the magical world. And even then most of their contact is with the goblin nation, who couldn't care less about wizards. So it takes some time for them to realize what and who and where.

Their search is not helped by the fact that the child they come to realize is the new immortal is largely kept in a cupboard and rarely allowed to leave the house, rendering them only the tiniest of dream details to search with. They finally manage to track down Harry a year before he's due to start primary school, c. late 2022-early 2023.

Everyone is confused as to why the immortal Harry Potter is aging - and he's very clearly immortal, having survived both the Killing Curse and the Dursley's neglect - but figure he'll stop aging once he reaches adulthood. Which is good, because none of them had any idea what they'd do with an immortal toddler.

Joe and Nicky raise Harry, who is rechristened Hari al-Kaysani after it wins the vote. Harry Potter disappears from the Hogwarts Book of Names, but since only the incoming first year names are readable at any given time, no one notices for years.

(This is helped by Mrs. Figg being conveniently away on holiday when the Dursley's are found neatly murdered in their bed. Dudley is left with most of his memory wiped at a hospital in Plymouth, is taken into foster care, and is eventually adopted by a nice elderly couple. He takes over their antique restoration business when they retire - and is very surprised when the children he and his partner have via surrogate have magic.)

And so it is a very different Hari who attends Hogwarts in 2029 - still a little marked from his childhood traumas, but with a loving, supportive family who have taught him to do no harm but take no shit. His humor is perhaps more morbid than the average 11 year old's, but he is kind and stubborn and has a sense of justice that could double as a knife. He is, naturally, a Hufflepuff.

Hari's school years largely follow canon in plot, if not followthrough. As no one makes the connection between Harry Potter - portrayed in media as an Anglo Gryffindor child savior - and Hari al-Kaysani - hard-working international desi student - he's largely separate from what drama still exists.

First year has the school in a tizzy over Harry Potter's "disappearance", with a few details re: his placement at the Dursley's coming to light in the papers. All this largely passes Hari by until Quirrel decides to kidnap him to use to get past the Mirror. This goes as well as canon, with Hari having to kill Quirrel - and dying himself for the first time since his adoption. His parents are livid and threaten to pull him from Hogwarts unless safety measures improve.

Second year has the petrifications, which Hari doesn't mention to his family, wanting to stay at Hogwarts. This backfires on him when he more or less is dragged into the Chamber by a bewitched Ginny and ends up killing the basilisk. And dying again. Hari exits the Chamber to find his family in full battle gear, preparing to rescue him - and gets the lecture of his life. As does Dumbledore, for being even more careless with student safety. And Ginny, for writing in a cursed book.

This is also when Dumbledore starts to suspect Hari is Harry Potter and adjusts his plans accordingly.

Third year is fairly quiet despite Sirius' breakout. Most of the drama occurs outside the school.

Nicky, having managed to leverage the danger Hari has been in the last two years into a seat on the Hogwarts board of governors, starts ruthlessly pushing for a reform of Hogwarts' security measures and bylaws. He not only manages to block Dementors from Hogwarts, but get most of his concerns addressed. It is one his ward updates which identifies both Sirius and Wormtail on the school grounds. Both get their trials, with Sirius going free and Wormtail being imprisoned.

Nicky manages to use this and his family name to gain a seat on the Wizengamot, which Joe takes up with a more subtle brand of ruthlessness that have all involved ruing the day they agreed to it.

Fourth year goes well, until the Goblet names "Harry Potter" as the fourth champion. As magic is about intent, it doesn't matter that Hari has never thought of himself by that name - he hadn't known his name at all at the Dursleys - the fact that the person who entered him intended for The Boy-Who-Lived to compete in the Tournament and Hari once defeated Voldemort is enough for the Goblet.

Despite Nicky and Joe's best attempts, Hari is still forced to compete. As a result Andy takes up residence at the school as "headmistress" of Hari's unnamed fourth school and makes life a pain for certain responsible parties.

This leads to a lot of drama involving several people being angry he "disguised" himself to attend Hogwarts, "lied" to them about who he was, and/or failed to live up to their expectations. The most drama should come from Sirius, who is angry Hari "hid" from him after his trial.

The Third Task ends as with canon - but with Voldie a little less snakelike and a little more rational, thanks to the immortality in Hari's blood. (And Andy, ever suspicious, manages to catch out fake Moody and reveals him far more publicly, in a way Fudge can't deny.)

Fifth Year goes better than canon. Thanks to Andy capturing Crouch, the public is aware someone tried to revive Voldie. Most believe they failed and it's a fake wandering around causing chaos, but at least they're somewhat aware of the danger.

Fudge is ousted from office, Andy is put in place as the new DADA teacher, and Dumbledore slowly tries to rope Hari back into his schemes, not realizing the Horcrux in him died with Hari during his second death (age 24 months, the Dursley's having left him locked in a hot car) - indeed having no idea of Hari's immortality at all.

The more Dumbledore tries to groom Hari, the more his family makes life difficult for the Headmaster. This should include Booker publishing a better researched, less sensational version of Rita's biography - which has Dumbledore sacked from all his positions but headmaster, though not for lack of trying.

The Guard spends most of the year trying to figure out how Voldie achieved his immortality and what his Horcruxes might be. The Order continues their ineffective business with the prophesy, leading to a big battle in the Ministry in which no children take part but several order members are killed, including Sirius.

Hari, despite never having been close to his godfather in this AU, inherits all - including the Locket.

Sixth Year has Dumbledore try to pull Hari in to private lessons, which is parents refuse to allow. The Guard quietly finds and destroys all the remaining Horcruxes save Nagini - and the ring, which Dumbledore found first. Snape kills a dying Dumbledore at his request when the Death Eaters attack the school at the end of the year... while on the grounds Nile kills a snake and Andy beheads a newly-mortal Voldemort with her labrys.

As the public believe this Voldemort is a pretender, this only gets them limited fame. Which is better for all involved.

(Snape escapes Azkaban only by sharing his memories of Dumbledore's death at his trial, but is asked not to return to Hogwarts.)

Seventh Year is a normal school year, with the adults mopping up Death Eaters on the outside - until the very end of the year, when a rogue Voldemort supporter AKs Hari in the middle of the Great Hall. Andy, who is still DADA teacher, removes the body before he can revive, and thus ends their child hero as far as the Wizarding World is concerned. In "grief" his family disappears from public and in a handful of generations Harry Potter is largely relegated to the history books.

After his death at 17, Hari stops aging and his active magic turns inwards, much like the others. Becoming a near-squib is quite a change, but he has his family and is old enough to join them on their missions in the muggle world. It's not the destiny others hoped for him, but he's happy and loved and, in the end, that's all that matters.

Bonuses include: 1) An exploration of what it means to be desi in the British Wizarding World. Extra bonus points if Hari's background is Pakistani Muslim, simply because I don't think I've seen it done before and I think it could be fascinating, particularly given Joe and Nicky's own backgrounds; 2) An exploration of what it means to be squib or near-squib in the Wizarding World. This shouldn't be a straight linear things are so much better than the past, where we just killed our squibs, but include many ups and downs in treatment throughout history - and the acknowledgement that while squibs are treated much better than they were two hundred years ago, they're still treated much worse than they were a thousand years ago; 3) the Wizarding World being presented as deeply flawed, but no more so than any government of its era. Political polarization and unwillingness to compromise should be at the root of many of its problems. Joe, during his tenure in the Wizengamot, should be renowned for gathering opposing politicians in a room, sitting them down, and forcing them to talk about their issues like unruly children; 4) A misguided Dumbledore who genuinely thinks he's doing the right thing, and 5) Hari starting a societal revolution by being the first at Hogwarts to have a smart phone that works with magic, thank you Uncle Booker.

And that's all I have. As always, feel free to adopt this bun, just link back to me if you do anything with it.

More Terrible Fic Ideas

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katiemods · 1 year

Text

Poll: What mod series should I focus on next?

Parenting Mod Series (Like)

Reassure and praise your kids, as well as other general Loving interactions for parents

Get to know your Sims kids by asking them about their favorite books, memories, their friends, hobbies, etc.

Discipline Interactions, such as grounding, showing disappointment, giving a lecture, yelling, etc.

More detailed and realistic child development phases

Arguments

Emotional Support and Asking for Advice

And more!

Mental Health Mods Series (Reblog)

Self-Esteem, Resilience and Empathy Skills

Go to therapy

Get Mental Illnesses by assigning them to your Sim as a trait

Get Mental Illnesses through gameplay (e.g. a fire in the house may give a Sim PTSD, etc)

Improve your Sims mental health through coping skills interactions like journaling, talking to a friend, meditating, etc.

And More!

(not developed yet, so I don't have a sneak peak yet!)

Vote: Reblog for Mental Health, Like for Parenting ❤️

#sims 4 #sims #the sims #the sims 4 #ts4 #sims 4 mods #sims mods #simblr #sims storytelling #sims cc #sims 4 mod #sims 4 parenting #sims 4 mental health #sims 4 interactions

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loquaciousquark · 6 months

Text

Got spoiled twice in casual browsing this afternoon, so decided to go ahead and play through the epilogue on my original Tavish save set so I'd at least get the comfort of seeing the big stuff for the first time on my own. (Thanks to @eponymous-rose for keeping me company despite spoilers!)

I am honestly SO HAPPY with 99% of the epilogue! Everything with Wyll, Karlach, Jaheira, Halsin....if I keep going I'm just going to name all the characters but ESPECIALLY WYLL AND KARLACH. Oh my gosh, the hints towards finding a forge in the Hells! Wyll's eye! His armor looks so unbelievably dumb but I guess when you're living hand to mouth in Avernus you make what you can get. I bet it's not as good as that Helldusk armor I had him in, but oh well.

Tara was there! We got to talk to Tara! And tell everyone Astarion & Tavish were dating! And so many people wanted to talk about what we were doing and what we were up to--ahh, I loved it. I will say I cackled like a loon at the idea of Tav giving a lecture at Blackstar Academy or whatever it is and Astarion sitting at Gale's desk kicking up his feet and knocking over all his desk decorations.

Scratch got new animations! Throwing the astral prism as a fetch object was absolutely inspired, and the little animation set where he just sits down and gnaws on it and throw it around--so unbelievably cute. And he sleeps! He sleeps on its side and it's so STINKIN cute! And the owlbear going to live with Shadowheart--I'm cryyyyying, I'm so happy for her and her cottage and her hoard of animals and her million flowers I'm sure are there.

And even the little QoL things like having a chest full of clothes and dye! So thoughtful and nice! I would have killed that halfling for a potion of animal speaking, though - I'll drink one before the Netherbrain next time to make sure it carries over.

The only teensy weensy tiny itty bitty complaint I have is that I wanted to be able to kiss Astarion at this party. Just once! And I wanted him to go out and be merry with everybody! I'll accept that he's feeling skulky and be satisfied immensely with my hugs, but Tavish on the new run hasn't gotten to Moonrise yet, so I'm starving for a lack of kisses here, augh.

I loved every word Withers said. I loved every second/third/fourth round of dialogue for all the companions. Jergal is such a dang bro and he seemed so enthusiastic to get to hang with the fam. Bless!

I do wonder if it's possible to try to kill people at this party - there were certainly enough death-causing implements and scrolls floating around!

And then the END CREDITS?????????????? Raphael ranting about THE CROWN OF KARSUS?????????????? This does explain why Gale made a point of saying it had gone back to Mystra when we most deffo left that sucker in the river, but HELLS-RELATED DLC???? I THOUGHT KARLACH AND WYLL WERE JUST LEAVING THEIR FATES OPEN-ENDED AND THEN ACTUALLY JK WE MIGHT BE GOING THERE??????????????????

Surely this is a promise of upcoming DLC, surely. I have no idea if they intend this to be paid or free (honestly I think it should be paid) but either way I'll throw every dollar I have at them if and when it comes out. How is Raphael alive. How is Mystra going to keep the crown from him. How are we going to get the gang back together. What does Zariel's area look like!! Will we get to go past level 12!! How is Raphael ALIVE!!

I honestly just had the biggest grin on my face the entire time. Every conversation, every hug, every gesture. What a complete delight, and I can't believe we get it for free.

(Sidenote: I was also beyond overjoyed that this patch also fixed the Astarion epilogue, the broken scars cutscene, and apparently the kisses. Again, Tavish hasn't gotten to at-will kisses yet, and I'm DYING.)

(Sidesidenote: I couldn't get any of my first game saves to load after a certain point [turned out to be due to an old mod I'd uninstalled] and troubleshooting that to get the saves to work again was honestly really fun, ahh.)

#quark plays bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers

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smilingangel582 · 9 months

Note

Can I request a Ler Lyney x Lee Lynette?

Ohhhhooo, I've never done that beforeeee. I'm not really a lee!Lynette stan, but I can try... since she's a cutie and deserves laughter. Sorry if this is short. I usually am not creative with female lees! Cuz i believe they r toughies and amazing lers! hehehe, anyway, hope this is OK for u...

Enjoyyy~

Cats and tickles

"Lynette, how many times have I told you..."

The younger twin sister merely stared nonchalantly at her brother's strict lecture. She kept on sipping her tea, knowing he's disappointed by her extremely inconsiderate diet plan.

"If you eat like this, it might affect the show too"

Her purple eyes glinted. "Then why don't you do the same as me?"

He gave her a look now, and as she attempted to feast on her final dessert he poked her side "Don't. Take. Another. Bite!"

She anxiously felt his pokes rather tingly, and it was dangerous. Activate escape mode.

"No, no, no. " he was slightly playful as he knew she'd flee away from the living room and soon began to grab her sides.

She choked at this, the ticklish touch which her brother loves to exploit so much for punishments. She whined "Pleeease... noho"

"Dear sister, doth mine ears deceive me or did you just laugh?"

She looked away shyly. "Whatever... ahaha. " Soft giggles left her lips as she felt his assault more obviously. Indeed she wasn't the most ticklish, but she wasn't in the mood for revenge, or not yet at least. She wanted to at least let him have his fun. It's not like she hates it.

Although... her dessert is getting chilled...

Drat!

"Lynehehey, nohoho tihihickles..." she giggles as she tries to push his hands away, but he seems too engrossed on the spectacle happening in front of him.

"No way, you defy me and now have the audacity to say you don't want this?" He was being gentle but then again, not merciful.

Eyed widening, he targeted her hips and she was no longer playing nice. With a firm reach to get his wrists he was stopped instantly.

Though he was surprised by her new found strength, he tried to play along "Well? Do you regret it?"

She managed to keep her face cool now. "Hm... perhaps I was too rash. I'll keep in mind to have a better diet"

He smiled fondly now, but he lowered his guard when she pushed him back now pinning him instead.

"But I also plan on getting you back ten folds, my naive brother"

"H-huh? Ahahah wahahait" he was already giggling wearily, he seriously didn't expect Lynette to have strength to attack back, but being gullible he thought she was fighting to free herself.

Drat!

"No, no, no Lyney~"

Augh! That same teasing. Lyney felt insulted, but only louder and frantic giggles came. He can't let her get him as she always did... maybe...

Lynette for the first time shrieked so loud that she was surprised enough to even say anything. He was temporarily frozen by how she made such a loud noise. Were her ears that bad?

This is news...

He giggled mischievously "Whahat in the world was that?"

She was ashamed, her expression changing to a flustered blush, then looking down she was more quiet then ever "I don't know..."

She flinched now with streaming giggles as he was rubbing her ears. Suddenly feeling contented that she's actually feeling the pressure for once from his tickling. Rather than the other way around.

"aHahaha LYNEY! AHAHA..." She cried out now almost as loud as he is. It's a rare sight indeed. Her tears pricked at the corner of her eyes as he soon felt like easing up on the torture though... it was a mistake...

Too late though.

"L-Lynette...?" Her expression was too difficult to read. One minute she was embrassed meanwhile the other minute... she was plotting.

He knew he couldn't have won a tickle fight against her, but... he did realise her ears are bad and could've made it well less one-sided. He now debated whether he could take these chances this time-

"AHAHAHAH LYNEHEHETTE! I AHAHAH SORRY! SORRY! SERIOUSLY!"

Never mind, she's persistent. Of course, this Lynette is...

"Activate revenge mode... Lyney, it's over for you. " she sounded like the terminating robot and feirce at the same time. With that, her continuous drilling under his armpits intensified. Like he got her worst spot, she just did return the favour, so he's not exactly complaining.

"I won't D-DO IT! AHAHAHA, I SWEEEAHAHEAR!"

He did mentally cross his fingers, though, as seeing the adorable blush on her face was worth what he's paying for. Indeed the price is great but the reward is worth it. He might try tickling her ears again, though he should prepare a coffin the next time he does so.

Hehe, sorry for making it a switch... just that I love those two so much.

Ps. Lynette with sensitive ears is Canon! Neehehehe. It's cute! And Lyney's armpits, hahahaha

#tickle fic #cute #genshin impact #genshin impact tickle #lee!lynette #ler!lyney

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behindthewox · 2 months

Note

What is your opinion on the MoM of JM eliminating the chat hierarchy?

Personally I highly disagree with this decision, as we were already dealing with people stepping on everyone else’s toes. Now we have literally every staff member in chat RACING to correct them first, often not even explaining correctly.

Example:

What your supposed to say: “Watch the spam, remember that the maximum of repeated words in a row is considered spam <3”

What is typically said: “Watch ur spam!”

followed by:

“HAHAHHA BEAT YOU IM THE FASTEST.”

It’s unacceptable and making a mockery of another persons mistakes and I am positive that we have lost new users over this new rule. Heck, I wouldn’t spend another minute on a site that found my mistake as a funny joke or a race.

Well, it's probably an efficient method of losing users and making other people question who put a child in charge of all the children. Like Peter Pan in Neverland. Is that too harsh of me to say? Forgive me, but I will be harsh with this one.

It's human nature to want to make yourself look good and correcting other people's mistakes is an easy opportunity to do that. People will take that opportunity without really thinking about it, especially children and teens who tend to be more impulsive. If a child sees someone do wrong, they are likely to point it out because they know it's wrong and they want the world to see that they know better. In teenagers it's less apparent and more controlled, but it's still there - especially online. You often see it in adults too, people who haven't yet matured and/or learned when to shut up. But to put it simply, it's a behaviour associated mainly with children, and to sum it up in a single verb: it's childish.

Taking a step back and not intervene in a situation takes some learning, and lots of practise. WoX is a great place to do that learning, but it needs to be organised and structured with guidance from experienced mods/admins who know what they're doing. There has to be an "adult" in charge to draw the lines, and keep everyone within them. Without "adults" all you've got is children and there's a reason Peter Pan kidnapped Wendy. The Lost Boys were lost without an adult to guide them.

So my question is, where are the adults? Don't kidnap a Wendy, that's illegal.

(for more about chat moderation, "Keep reading")

If I was a site leader and my staff competed to correct users in the chat, I'd give them all a very serious lecture and point out that if they can't handle the position and authority they've got, then they shouldn't have it. Competing to correct other people's mistakes and wrongs is childish, disrespectful and highly unprofessional, not to mention upsetting and potentially hurtful to new users who may simply have made an honest mistake.

Sometimes hierarchies are bad, but oftentimes they are actually a good thing. Hierarchies of authority exist for many reasons, one reason being to make sure each task and responsibility is handled by the person or people who will do it correctly. Chat moderation can be tricky and needs to be done right, using pre-agreed methods and ongoing teamwork. Discord servers were important for this, allowing the chat moderators to communicate off-site about what to do (and what not to do) and share information and instructions.

It's also important to keep it minimal and make sure it doesn't get overwhelming and feels like an attack. One moderator is usually enough to deal with most situations, the more moderators you get involved the messier it gets with risks of contradicting statements/instructions and making the situation a whole lot bigger than it actually is. Mistakes should always be forgiven and approached with gentle nudges, not a response as if they've broken every rule in the book. For example, sending one message too many is NOT a big deal. It's worth a polite nudge, but no more. Five different people calling you out for spamming over one message is out of proportion, feels like an attack and frankly looks unprofessional and childish.

The chat hierarchy is in place to prevent that. Those with authority to give reminders should be instructed to step back if someone else is already dealing with it, especially if that someone has higher authority. They will (presumably) know how to handle it correctly and what information to give.

Rules exist for a reason. The reasons aren't always obvious, but they are there. Don't dismiss them just because you don't understand them.

#wox #wox site #chat moderation

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twistmusings · 1 year

Note

Hi mod Azul!! I hope you're having a wonderful day :) This might be a little silly, but can I request the octo trio with a yuu that's a really good flier? I can see yuu diving down on a broom to catch the boys from falling, or wrapping the boy's arms around their waist and telling them to hold on. On a more hectic note, I can also see them jumping onto one of the boys brooms while both are on the run, or just being experimental with tricks in general. With how gifted the octo trio is with flying, I mean,,, the hilarity of it all lmao????

I hope you're having a wonderful day as well!!

Octatrio with a MC that's exceptionally good at flying

CW: None! It's just goofs!

Azul Ashengrotto

He likes them a lot, but he feels like he will never truly know peace with them being as passionate as they are about flying. He knows they're skilled, but he simply wishes he could be far, far away when they're practicing.

It's no exaggeration to say that Azul hates flying with ever fiber of his being. So, initially, them assisting when he would tip over off the side of his broom was very appreciated. Now if only it had stayed at that.

See, they offered to tutor him. Being who he is, Azul always wants to improve himself. He wants to be as competent on a broom as they are. It, by all appearances, should be beneficial, right?

Wrong. Wrong. So very, very wrong. Azul realized this about the time that they said "hold on" and encouraged him to hold onto their waist. He had been confused first, but followed their instructions, only for them to rocket off at full speed. He screamed himself hoarse and they were laughing.

It is five minutes of absolute hell, and the moment they slow down and dip back down to ground level, Azul gets off the broom and collapses down to the earth immediately. He can't stand up because his legs are jelly, and he can't even lecture them for the stunt because he's breathing too fast. He feels frighteningly like a human Yahtzee cup and his organs are the dice.

His weak "Never. Do. That. Again." seems to fall on deaf ears as they erupt into peals of laughter again.

It's far from the last time he has the... misfortune of being on a broom with them, though. Aside from the tutoring, they have this habit of jumping onto his broom with him while he's trying to practice during PE and using it to escape whatever problems they're causing with their antics. It's an unfortunate reflex he's developed that if they so much as touch his broom, he's reaching for their waist to cling for his life and desperately wishing he had the other eight limbs to keep himself rooted to them.

And as if all of that wasn't traumatic enough for him, they love to showboat. On at least one occasion they've had to stop his unconscious body from falling to the ground after he fainted when they did a loop with him on the broom.

The worst part is... his flying grade has gotten better so he can't even say that he hasn't learned anything. Sometimes he thinks that he really must be a masochist to keep putting himself through this... but it's the only thing that has seemed to genuinely help him improve...

Jade Leech

Jade handles being airborne with more grace than Azul does, but he still hates it. His grades in flight are still pretty poor.

He is grateful when they rescue him from a nasty tumble off his broom, and when they offer pointers he thinks that it might be wise to have a listen to what they say.

He wasn't expecting a live demonstration, but sure enough they tell him to get on the back of their broom and grab their waist. Jade is... skeptical to say the least, after all he's 6'3" and weighs in just under 200 lbs, so he really doubts that holding onto them is going to do much good if he truly ends up in trouble, but he decides to trust their judgement.

They take off like a rocket and... Jade is stunned into wide-eyed silence.

It's not until they land again and Jade moves to step off the broom that his fear becomes clear, as, like Azul, he simply slumps down on himself as well. He's not laying on the ground, but it takes him a few minutes to regain the strength in his legs again.

See... Jade is quite afraid of heights. He can handle it when he has climbing gear or when he has a mountain that he can anchor himself to, but when there's nothing but air below him he's terrified.

At least they seem pretty genuinely concerned about him and check on him. He appreciates it, but it's hard to explain that he just hates the feeling of his legs dangling like that. He decides to accept their offer for tutoring because he figures if anyone can teach him a smidge of confidence on a broom, it's probably going to be them.

Their lessons are usually normal, but sometimes they will throw Jade a complete curveball. They'll take over flying and do a spin or flip the broom over. Thankfully they've been staying relatively low to the ground so Jade knows if he slips and falls he won't be super likely to be hurt, but he feels something in his brain switch into full wild Moray Eel danger mode and he simply goes entirely still. He knows if he was under the sea he would probably be hiding in a rock crevice, but that's not an option when you're not even on land, let alone sea.

Floyd Leech

Floyd is honestly used to tumbling off his broom in flight classes. He sucks flying, and he embraces that proudly. He will still chirp a Thanks when they save him from landing on his ass though.

He's initially not all too interested when they offer to show him some pointers, thinking it will be boring. However, they grin at him wickedly and tell him to get on their broom and something in him says 'Oh this is going to be FUN' and he climbs aboard.

They go super fast. Floyd might be clinging for dear life, but he's laughing manically and shouting with glee as they race through the air. They even do a little loop and Floyd almost tips off the broom when he stops holding on to throw his arms up in the air.

He doesn't take them up on the offer for lessons, but he does tell them that they can take him on another joyride anytime they like. Truthfully, Floyd has very little interest in learning how to fly long-term, he knows it's not something that's really going to matter when he graduates. But he is down for a good time.

They get along well, actually. Floyd doesn't mind at all when they hop on his broom and steal him away with it to get themselves out of trouble. He definitely needs to be reminded to hold on, though, because he will forget to do that and slip off.

He loves when they do tricks. It's kind of like being on a rollercoaster. (Not that he ever has been on one, but he imagines it is.) He loves when they do loops or spins because, frankly, he's very used to being upside down on his broom anyway.

#answered;;#twisted wonderland spoilers #twst #azul ashengrotto #jade leech #floyd leech #humor;;

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alchemic-writings · 1 year

Text

A Welcome Distraction Ch.2

This Story Is 18+ You can find Ch.1 here

My eye twitches as I look at the message in front of me.

[1:14 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

Are you stupid?

What a great way to welcome someone to your community! I hear Ais and Vere both groan behind me as they stare at the same message. “God, I recognize that profile picture. This moderator is such a bore,” Vere flips his hair over his shoulder as he continues, “I once made a post advertising my cam show and they banned me for a month!” Ais nods his head in recognition of the memory, “Mn, their kink must be having a stick up their ass or something. I don’t get how they can ever meet anyone here when they’re such a buzzkill.”

I sigh as my fingers hover over the keyboard. “It makes sense for them to be suspicious of my thread. They probably think I’m a bot or a scammer or something.”

[1:14 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

Are you stupid?

[1:17 am] Dreadful Hands:

Hi! I’m so sorry, my friend wrote that post as a joke.

If you could delete that for me and let me write

a PROPER introduction I promise it’ll be less like a bot lol.

I lean back and cross my arms, “See guys? Sometimes the best thing to do is to not be constantly antagonistic! Just apologizing can get you a long way instead of being an ass,” my lecture is paused as a new message notification pops up.

[1:19 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

I’ve deleted your post, but I’m going to need

to approve of your new introduction before I can let you send it.

You obviously have no idea what you’re doing and neither does your friend.

Laughter fills the air behind me as Ais and Vere read over my shoulder. Ais puts his head on my shoulder as he pats my head, “Does little sparrow need to get permission from their teacher before they can post on the bdsm website?” I shake him off as I turn to point at the two of them, “You two are the reason I’m in this situation!” Vere covers his grin with a hand, “Well what kind of response did you expect from a dom?” I pause. This moderator is a dom? I click on their username which leads me to their profile. I can now see their profile picture larger now and I can’t stop my jaw from dropping. It’s a simple picture of their back, but it is covered with beautiful black ink to form raven wings from the nape of their neck all the way down to their cute dimples on their lower back. Under the layer of dark ink is beautiful pale skin that lets me see the way their muscles are toned but not bulky. They could easy manhandle someone while still keeping a lithe figure that would be delicious to dig my nails into-

“Hellooooo? Earth to dumbass?” I am snapped out by the motion of Vere’s hand waving in front of my face. I sent a glare his way, “What?” Ais responds for him with a shit eating grin, “We just didn’t want you drooling all over the keyboard is all.” My face begins to flush as I scramble for a response, “Wha- I was not- I did not drool.” One of Ais’s eyebrows quirk as he points to the corner of his lip. I raise my hand to my own before gasping when my fingers make contact with wetness. The two begin laughing as I quickly wipe the liquid from my mouth, “Okay, maybe I just appreciate a nice tattoo!” Ais flexes his arm, causing the inked tentacles on him to bludge. I roll my eyes at the action and return my eyes to StarRaven’s profile.

Their only picture is the one they have as their profile image, but they do have a description in their bio

[(MOD) StarRaven: 26, Dom, Masters Student at Senobium University]

Short and simple, all the necessary information someone might need about them. I sigh as I look over the rest of their completely blank profile. They’ve never made their own forum thread unless it was to remind others of community guidelines or to respond to any questions or to give advice to others posts. Based on their responses they’re extremely knowledgeable in bdsm and willing to answer reasonable questions. I bite my lip as I close the laptop. I absolutely cannot let these two know what I’m planning lest they bully me into oblivion. “I’m too tired to bother typing out an intro post now. I’m going to get changed and crash on the couch,” I sit up and pick up my clothes that I left unceremoniously on the floor in the closet before heading to the bathroom.

As soon as the door is locked I quickly pull out my phone. I download the app and enter my login information. Adrenaline causes my fingers to shake as I open the private messages icon and begin typing.

[1:32 am] Dreadful Hands:

I totally have no idea what I’m getting into with bdsm…

But I really want to!!

Would you be willing to answer my questions?

I promise no stupid ones!

I quickly turn off my phone and set it on the counter before beginning to change back into my original clothes. There was no turning back and if I get rejected, who cares? They’re just a random stranger, it’s not like there aren’t hundreds of doms I can ask for advice from, that I can get dominated by. A shiver still runs down my back at the thought of running my nails down those black wings regardless…

When I finish changing, I immediately make my way out of the bathroom and enter the darkness of Vere’s room. The two have already decided to turn in for the night, Ais holding onto Vere and playing with the latter's hair when his eyes flit up to meet mine. A soft smile rests on Vere’s face as he hums in his sleep. I send Ais a sympathetic look but he shakes his head in response. He blames himself for catching romantic feelings for Vere, but I can’t help but feel my heart break for him as I see him literally hold what he wants but also not be close enough. I quietly step out of the bedroom and close the door behind me, giving the two privacy that I am sure Ais appreciates.

I settle onto the sofa in the living room and wrap myself in the blanket hanging off of it as I pull out my phone again and see I have received new messages on Collared. With bated breath I open the app, fully prepared to be rejected.

[1:38 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

You really must be desperate.

Asking a stranger to explain bdsm to you…

But if I say no you’ll just ask someone else and get hurt.

Fine. Ask away.

My feet kick under the blanket at my success as I quickly respond back.

[1:56 am] Dreadful Hands:

Thank you Thank you!!

I promise not to let you down >:3

Ok first question:

What do you do if someone is all tied up

But they need to use the restroom??

[1:57am] (MOD) StarRaven:

You’re going to make me regret agreeing to this.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A yawn leaves my mouth as I rub my eyes; I ended up texting with StarRaven until 4 am when they logged off saying they needed to head into work. Despite them insisting that they cannot be on their phone at their job, they continue responding to my messages within an hour. I suppose I’m no better, though. Hiding in the corner of the front counter while I look down at my phone in glee as I type my next message.

[10:17 am] DreadfulHands:

I feel like I’ve just spilled my heart

out for you to dissect lol.

When are you gonna share your kinks??

[10:17 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

I’m not going to.

[10:18 am] DreadfulHands:

Whhhaaatt why not??

I feel like I’m being taken advantage of now ;A;

Aren’t we supposed to trust each other and share

this stuff with each other?? You said yourself that

communication is the most important part of bdsm.

[10:18 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

We’re not each other’s dom/sub.

Unlike some I don’t want to share that

with every person I come across online.

I only share that when I meet someone in person

for a session zero.

My eyes flit over to the room around me after I read their message. The cafe had already finished its brunch rush and we won’t expect more customers for at least another hour. When my eyes find my screen again I begin typing out my response before I can even process what I’m asking for.

[10:20 am] DreadfulHands:

What if we had a session zero, then?

I watch as the typing bubble pops up, attention completely focused on their response. It’s true that I haven’t known Raven for even twelve hours but dammit I wanted them! I haven't felt this drawn to someone since Quinn, and having the ability to explore something I’ve always been interested in pulling me towards them even more.

A cough from behind me startles me out of my thoughts so much that I jump, nearly dropping my phone. I scramble to catch it midair as I hear the same voice chuckle at my reaction. I confirm the cause of my mini heart attack when I turn around and find my boss, Leander, standing in front of me with his arms crossed and a carefree smile on his face.

Once he has my attention he begins to walk towards me before stopping an arms length away, “Had a fun night last night?” A blush forms on my face as I look towards him. “W-what do you mean by that?” He hums as he eyes me up and down, “Well your clothes are wrinkled, you look like you didn’t get a second of sleep, and you’ve been on your phone your entire shift.” I cringe at how observant Leander is. His care for others can be both a blessing and a curse. A blessing when he noticed how miserable I was after breaking up with Quinn and giving me an entire week off, and a curse as he eyes me right now, waiting for a response.

I finally got the courage to look him in the eyes, “Not in that way I’m afraid, I spent the night with Vere and Ais,” Leander gives a nod in understanding. Those two have visited me at my job before, but they never stay for long and it’s very brief. But even a brief encounter with them can reveal their attitudes. “It’s good to hangout with your friends, a distraction is needed every once in a while. Just try to focus while you’re on the floor, okay?” I nod, “Yes’sir! I won’t let it happen again.” A soft smile forms on Leander’s lips before he sighs, “I know that It’s a Sunday, but seriously between you and Mhin it seems like everyone is distracted today.”

The mood in the front of the store immediately sours at the mention of our coworker. Mhin, our baker and resident sourpuss. They come in at 5 am every morning to get everything ready for the day and prepare the foods that will be sold tomorrow. I only see them for at most an hour every shift before they clock out at 10 am to head home. Every attempt I have made to be friendly towards them has been met with rejection. It's a mystery how someone is so bitter and creates pastries that are so sweet. Maybe it’s because they pour any sweetness they have into their baked goods. Based on the time it seems that Leander’s statement is true, it’s already thirty minutes past when Mhin would usually clock out for the day. The image of Mhin being glued to their phone seems like an oxymoron. As far as I’m aware they only have one friend, a doctor named Kuras, that has only shown up to visit Mhin once since I’ve worked here. I find it hard to believe there would be anyone they could be excited enough to text throughout their shift.

I can feel my phone buzz in my pocket as my heart tightens. That must be Raven’s response to my suggestion. They took such a long time to respond to it that my blood pressure begins to rise at the thought of what they have said. Buzz. Buzz. They’re sending multiple messages. My heart begins to pound as I excuse myself to use the restroom, but as I turn the corner I slam myself into someone else. Strong hands find my waist to push me back from the person I just ran into.

As I step back to apologize I am met with a harsh voice instead, “God, can’t you watch where you’re going?” Any thought of an apology is lost in anger as I snap back, “Watch where I’m going? You’re the one on your fucking phone!” My eyes flit down to the black cellphone in their hands. Their eyes squint at me and a blush begins to form on their cheeks as they pull up the hood of their jacket to hide it and push past me instead of responding. I don’t breathe until I hear the bell of the front of the store signaling their departure. I sigh as I begin to walk slowly to the bathroom.

Once the lock clicks into place on the door I slide against it while pulling out my phone. I unlocked it and finally read the messages from Raven.

[10:31 am] (MOD) StarRaven:

God, you really are desperate.

Fuck.

Fine, yeah. We can have a session zero.

Just don’t… Don’t have any high expectations, ok?

My heart begins to skip again but this time out of excitement rather than anxiety. Raven actually wants to meet me, and based on their texts they’re just as desperate as I am. I bite my lip as I hold my phone to my chest while proceeding to do exactly what they told me not to do. But how could I not hold high expectations? My first time meeting with a dom to have sessions with. Even though they haven’t brought up their previous relationships I can tell that they’re knowledgeable in a way that you don’t get from just being in a forum.

A dull ache begins to form between my legs as I rub my thighs together to try to relieve it. I don’t even know what they look like or if they’d want to have sex with me but I’m already imagining them tying me down to the bed to do whatever they want to me. A shiver runs down my spine just like when Ais put that collar on my neck last night. This… This is what submission is like. And I can already tell this isn’t something I’ll be able to live without now that I’m finally getting a taste of it. I snap out of my thoughts and look back to the open messages on my screen.

[10:38 am] Dreadful Hands:

When can we meet?

#touchstarved game #touchstarved mhin x reader #touchstarved mhin #touchstarved x reader #touchstarvedgame #touchstarved mc #my writings #mhin x reader

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