#asexual vampire

[naquey]

imagine if you will, an asexual vampire whom lives in a castle at the top of a hill and everyone in the town thinks the vampire is a sexy, mysterious creature, so some human goes up to the door and makes their way inside. Expecting to get ravaged by the vampire they're just like "You want me to what? No, no, no, no." "But I thought-" "I know that biting is a thing for humans, but I'd rather not... Especially when you're going to leave tomorrow and make a fuss about me being scary and mean." "Oh-" "I have a nice dinner in the dining room if you want some"

[aceoffangirls]

Okay hear me out,

A vampire story except the vampire is asexual and the conflict is them trying to figure out how to eat garlic bread

[vampyrkalm]

A neurodivergent vampire who isn’t actually flirting, they’re just being really nice and they’re literally acespec…

“Your dress is extremely beautiful in this moonlight… it matches your eyes so well!”

“What? Oh, no, I never really find joy or a need to be in those kinds of relationships but I’d love to be in a platonic fangship with you!”

Spookily stims and does happy dance

[grycensharp07]

I had this thought that it’d be neat if Lars and Mads played vampires together in something, then I came up with a story idea for it (four actually but this is the one that’s the most visually interesting) and then I decided to draw it to get it out of my system. They’re demonic bird puppies for story reasons and so I have an excuse to not feel bad about my horrible ability to draw likenesses

They’re Dracula’s heirs (their last name being Draculsen) through it’s unknown if he’s actually their father (Blood Heirs) or if he just bit them and passed his power along (Made Heirs) and they don’t know if they’re actually siblings but that part hasn’t ever mattered to them. Tønnes is believed to more likely be Dracula’s blood heir due to having the same copper-brass eyes as him though. They can turn into these eight foot (friendly fluff) demons because of Dracula’s inheritance, and they’re more or less chill nice people instead of evil overlords. They’re respected but somewhat controversial rulers due to their not taking to the bloody ways of vampires and preferring pacifistic approaches as a first resort, but they’ll make exceptions for tearing piece of shit wastes of air and their armies to pieces, along with any assassins sent to kill them. They also wish to push human-vampire relations toward being that of equals rather than predator and prey. Other vampires also think it’s weird that Ejnar has no interest towards lustful endeavours or the orgy parties and Tønnes has steadfast refused any arranged marriage attempts since it’s not as simple as falling in love traditionally for him and would rather any relationships he would get into involve a genuine connection between both parties. So for their detractors there’s not that much of an issue with succession to their benefit if one of their assassination attempts actually succeeds. Also Ejnar owns a female dragon he named Udholdenher and Tønnes owns a male griffin he named Musik, yes it’s impractical since they can both fly on their own but they love their big babies so much it doesn’t matter. Their big babies also get to rip apart would be assassins as a treat.

And as a joke let’s just say there’s a Benedict Cumberbatch vampire who’s the Made son of Carmilla and he’s basically their weird gay coded Barbie villain who’s obsessed with them, believing it’s time for a new reigning line of vampires and wants to trick them into biting him for a legitimate claim of power and masochist reasons. His name is Emil Augustine Carmillsohde and his demonic bat form would look like a hammerhead bat once he acquires it through emotional blackmail

Also I wasn’t expecting to finish and post this a few days after Lars’ birthday so take this as a happy little coincidence

link to my master post of Palestinian resources and individual families in need to either donate to or reblog, the people who rely on these links for aid would greatly appreciate it: https://www.tumblr.com/grycensharp07/745868866895446017/help-me-get-my-handicapped-child-out-of-gaza

[dvpendulum]

Laments of a Living Statue is published!

If you're looking for aro/ace representation in your vampire books, you might want to consider giving it a read! The story follows a young vampire having an identity crisis resulting from the things his mother taught him. You can buy the ebook or a physical copy here.

I'm still waiting for Barnes & Noble to get back to me before I release it there. If you wanna wait to buy it through B&N, give me a follow. I'll be posting updates.

[warmachine68]

This is for asexuals only so everyone else leave

[whereserpentswalk]

Your body will transform to fit the world you go to, and you can choose for time to pass slower on your original world. There's a good chance you'll end up dating (and probably fucking) the creature you with if that's the thing you're into. You can still contact them after you go back home.

Reblog to get them to appear swiftly. Like to give them a little treat on their way there.

[cholvoq]

“Softly you stir, Gently you moan

Lust in the air, Wake as I groan

In the dead of night, Love bites”

Literally the most vampire Steddie-coded song ever—

[thosedamnlemmings]

Must fucking SUCK (pun intended) to be an asexual vampire, like half of asexual cultures is just garlic bread and more garlic bread, could you imagine how upsetting that would be? I would cry

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

vampire fangs that protrude when vampires get excited. yes this includes bloodlust but also just general excitement.

imagine a vampire who giggles so hard at a joke their teeth stick out and they accidentally start wheezing on their own spit. a vampire giving a speech and they're nervous and agitated and halfway through their fangs come out and they have to finish the speech with a very distinct lisp. nerdy vampire who is gushing on about a special interest and gets so excited they cut their tongue on a fang; they keep explaining train timetables through a mouthful of blood.

[milfclarke]

I crave for a slave to please us 😫

[scrumptiousfoxglitter]

Found this on Twitter.

[echinocereus]

listen i’m ace but i would totally let a vampire drink my blood through my neck sexily okay

[loelett]

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL ASEXUAL DAY!!!!! they r celebrating by being weird about blood as usual

[seraphsfire]

so many 20 y/o's on twt: ugh astarion is so cool such a daddy hes so sexy mature and old and cool put my blood in a wine goblet sip it elegantly

me, 32: this is my miserable baby princess, he sucks at most things. lookit his bellybutton peekin

[maebilene]

VtM vampires have teeth erections.

discuss

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okay so here’s some mild explanation

vampire fangs in vampire: the masquerade are retractable for most vampires, however they will poke out on their if they are feeling real hungry or any particular emotion too vividly this includes horniness

vampires het hard in their fangs

also vampire oral is more risky in that world as well, but that’s for another day