#asmodai talks

[sena-shi]

Protector of Teyvat (a troll hell-bent on reviving everyone just for fun) P—3

Isekai’d reader who is hell-bent on reviving everyone using your cheat code as the protector of Teyvat. With great power comes great benefits! Teyvat population stonks

Note: asmoday is the unknown god, reader also grants gnosis and visions, isekai, slight sagau in the future chapters, op reader

Summary: You are just a regular human being living your best life on Earth, collecting husbandos and waifus in Genshin Impact when all of a sudden you were isekai'd to Teyvat, but not as a traveler, a creator, or an NPC. You are a very close friend of both Celestia and the Unknown God, who is known as the Sustainer of Heavenly Principles. You also hold a very important position of the highest order because unbeknownst to the general populace, you are the Protector of Teyvat from the outside forces. 

And so imagine the Archon's faces when their dead friends suddenly came back to life just so they can accompany you together with Aether and Paimon on a journey to spit on the Celestia's face

Timeline in Teyvat when you got transmigrated: Before any wars happened. Zhongli is probably sucking on a dragon pacifier or something if that even exists.

Warning: curse words, slight ooc, lore flying over the ocean and going for a swim, author removed the lore from the irminsul so act like you know nothing of it, i'm putting the lore in the cheese grater

“As what I am trying to say, Lady Y/N… is quite… a peculiar person.”

Jean sighed and scratched her temples, beginning to feel stressed. "Stop going in circles and get to the point, Kaeya."

About half an hour has passed since Kaeya first started talking, and it does not seem like he is going to get straight to the point any time soon.

Paimon flew closer to you, who was visibly bored as you sat on a chair, whispering into your ears.

“Paimon thinks you broke him...”

You folded your arms and looked at the man who had been struggling to explain for about ten minutes with a quiet chuckle. His eyes met yours, and he instantly averted his gaze, an embarrassed expression on his face.

And even Lisa, who is standing next to Jean, has been staring at you for quite some time. Her gaze was strong despite the pleasant smile on her face.

“You flatter me, Captain Kaeya.”

Jean arched an eyebrow at you, seemingly perplexed.

“After all, I am just a normal human being trying to make a living.”

She blinked, trying to process everything that is going on. If you're only something like a traveling merchant, why is Kaeya acting as if he's forced to sing praises about you?

The entire room fell silent, and all eyes were fixed on you.

With a straight face, you answered calmly, "I sell visions and use fried eggs to resurrect the dead.”

The room fell into an awkward silence as Kaeya coughed so loudly that he flopped down on the ground and decided to become one with the floor.

"This is quite a change of events," Lisa said with a beautiful frown as she glanced at Kaeya, who was suffering in silence.

Jean shook her head in utter confusion as she pointed at Kaeya, "Just why is he acting like this...?"

“Oh!” Paimon exclaimed in realization of Jean's question. She rubbed the side of her head then stroke her chin, as if she didn't know how to explain everything.

“Uhm— uh… Paimon's not sure who this Crepus guy is, but when Y/N threw a fried egg somewhere, he poof out of the ground and insisted on going to his son instead of joining us to meet you here.”

"He even wanted Kaeya to come along, but this man had already left before we realized it!" Paimon yelled and pointed towards Kaeya.

Jean raised a brow in confusion, and Paimon spoke once again, "It’s not Paimon’s fault, I swear! He suddenly appeared, and Kaeya looked like he had seen a ghost... Paimon is guessing that he is someone important that Y/N randomly brought back to life to scold Kaeya for touching her."

“Oh, my archons…”

Lisa turned to stare at Jean, her eyes wide with confusion.

“If I know… Crepus is Master Diluc’s father.”

Lisa gasped, and Kaeya seemed to be dead with his face plastered to the ground.

“Oh?” You shrugged your shoulders, glancing out the window, unconcerned with what was going on around you.

Jean sighed, obviously disturbed. "How is this even possible? I'm sure even the archons can't—"

“Lady Y/N is not an archon…”

“I’m afraid I don’t quite follow, Kaeya.” 

“Lady Y/N is someone who is much higher than the archons…”

Lisa appeared to be captivated with the new knowledge and immediately turned to gaze at you with amazement. You, on the other hand, paid no attention to her and continued to stare out the window absentmindedly.

Will Timmie make a great archon?

What if I give Timmie a Pyro Vision to roast his pigeons?

If I revive little floatie’s friend, will I have two little Venti?

But what if little floatie's friend starts to feel embarrassed when he sees the huge statue that looks like him standing in the middle of Mondstadt?

If I slap Dain with a fried egg to remove the curse, will he get mad? I’m pretty sure I’d lose my arm before my hand can even come close…

“Someone… higher than the archons?” Jean mumbled to herself.

Paimon huffed, placing her hands on her hips and said confidently, "She is the Protector after all!"

Lisa's eyes twinkled with delight and respect at the new revelation. Back in Akademiya, she unintentionally read a forbidden book about Teyvat's Protector. It was believed to have been authored by the first Dendro Archon, but the book has since been lost or stolen.

There are no other records of you save for that single book, which she is keeping so discreetly that she even went to Mondstadt to keep it safe, despite the fact that the book has reduced her lifespan in half. But unexpectedly, the book mysteriously vanished.

It was recorded that the God of Wisdom has only encountered you once, when they had ascended one of the seven seats, and there were no more chances of meeting you again because you've been protecting Teyvat in the shadows. You've been keeping Teyvat so safe that you have no time to even mingle with them.

"However, I have a sneaking suspicion that the Celestia is trying to keep her highness away from the seven archons, particularly the Anemo Archon,” —  this was one of the numerous lines written by the God of Wisdom that Lisa will never forget having to read.

It was only a one-time meeting, but it was described that all the archons were overjoyed to catch a glimpse of you. There must not be any records preserved or knowledge of you because doing so will provoke the heavenly principles. It's most likely that this is the reason why Sumeru was dealt such a devastating blow back then. And with such a wealth of information, Lisa is left wondering why she is still alive.

And now that the two of you even have the chance to meet, she considers herself to be one of the fortunate people in Teyvat to have the opportunity to speak with you face to face. 

Jean cast a quick glance in the direction of the librarian, who has all of a sudden adopted a new attitude towards you. Now that she's thinking about it, she's curious to find out what information the librarian has about you.

"...before we came to the headquarters, there were at least three or four citizens who had been granted with a vision.” Kaeya shuddered.

“Kaeya’s speaking the truth! Even Paimon has lost count already! At this point, the entire Mondstadt could be dubbed as the nation of vision holders!”

Paimon's voice jolted you out of your daze, prompting you to respond, "...I thought we'd keep that a secret."

“Oh— right! Paimon’s sorry!”

You laughed, softly waiving your hands as a sign that everything was fine. You looked at Jean, who was suddenly staring at you with such reverence that she seemed to want to grovel before you.

You smiled at her. “Anyways, are we done here?”

"Ah, yes," Jean said awkwardly, looking over at Aether, who was staring at you attentively, "About the storm terror attack."

"Y/N and the Anemo Archon supported me," Aether said with a blank expression and a shrug of his shoulders.

“Oh goodness… you’re traveling with the protector and even met the Anemo Archon?” Lisa asked, her mouth slightly wide in surprise.

“Anemo Archon, Anemo Archon, ah— my little floatie is just so adorable. Maybe I should travel the worlds with him after resigning…” You muttered to yourself.

Aether and the other people in the room have all of a sudden become alerted, and their attention is focused on you. Even Kaeya suddenly straightened his posture, only to see you staring peacefully outside the windows.

After resigning!? Travel alone with the Anemo Archon!? Jealous, jealous, jealous—

The voices of Celestia and Asmoday can be heard wailing somewhere in the distance in the sky. They are most likely devising a plot to put you behind bars at this very moment.

It shouldn't come as a surprise if the Anemo Archon suddenly have a club of haters.

You started humming a tune as you became aware of the peaceful atmosphere that was beginning to arise.

You snorted and mockingly said, "Oh? What exactly am I seeing? We've barely known each other for a day, and you're already obsessed with me?"

They all choked in embarrassment, turning away to hide their flushed cheeks.

You cocked your head to the side, amused, as they all began babbling silly reasons just to cover themselves up.

“W—well, it’s not everyday that you get to meet someone like— like—”

“Paimon thinks Y/N feels comfy to be around! Paimon’s not obsessed at all!”

Aether quickly agreed with a nod.

“Right, right, alright. If you people are still interested in discussing the stormterror attack, then I'll just leave you to it,” You gave them a soft smile as you floated right up from your seat and waved your hand before making the decision to vanish with a poof in order to bestow even more visions and cause more chaos.

"Don't look for me, I'm going to meet someone," They heard your voice echoing inside their thoughts, and it made them feel even greater animosity towards the person you are talking about.

“We don’t even want to talk about stormterror attack anymore!”

"…sigh. I wanted to listen more of her voice," Lisa grumbled, and Jean feels the same.

“She must’ve felt uncomfortable, she doesn’t want people talking about her after all.” Aether clicked his tongue in displeasure before running out the room with Paimon to find you.

"Just how am I going to explain everything to Diluc?" Kaeya chuckled bitterly as he slumped tiredly in the chair.

Thank the Gods you got away before they could get their paws on you. But it doesn't mean they won't pursue you.

“Woah! The birds are flocking to you!" Timmie talked happily, obviously amazed as he watched you almost completely covered in birds as you leaned on the parapet to watch the water race by.

"They're rather... heavy." You whispered, attempting to remain still while the birds that usually flew away at the sight of people treated you like a tree.

"Oh yeah! You're like God!"

You gave him a small grin as you looked down at him. "What makes you think that?"

“Well, I've heard stories about Lord Barbatos being so close to birds that he'd even fly alongside them! You're exactly like him!”

The birds chirped happily, rubbing their heads against your cheek as if they wanted to be complimented.

You snorted, trying to image Barbatos flying alongside the birds. You could say that your mind created a pretty humorous image.

Venti sat on top of the statue of the Anemo Archon, blushing profusely at what the wind had relayed to him. He's too sober enough to listen to your conversation, and he wishes he'd gone straight to the tavern to get drunk instead of stalking you.

But he wouldn't pass up an opportunity to see you.

"You seem to love pigeons a lot; do you wish to fly with them as well?"

“Yeah… I believe it would be cool, and maybe I'll be able to find daddy..."

You agreed with a little nod, calmly watching the river flow gently while Timmie stares in awe at how the sun rays were focused towards you, creating a lovely scene.

"Who knows, maybe you'll be reunited with your father soon," You spoke while remaining motionless in your position and gazing at the rushing river.

Timmie nodded, little relieved by your remarks. He has always waited, and he will never get tired of waiting.

“Hm?”

“What is it?”

You ignored Timmie as you cast a glance at the gates, sensing that at least four or five individuals were approaching you.

"I'm afraid our little bonding has to come to an end here."

Timmie pouted and mumbled cutely, "But me and my pigeons like you."

You amusedly ruffled his hair as you giggled at his antics.

"How about you come to me when you're lonely?" You smiled as you took his hands in your own and placed a glowing Anemo vision in his palm.

And then maybe when someone tries to hurt your pigeons, you can airbend the shit out of their lungs.

Timmie gaped, his gaze drawn to the vision in his hands and your bright, smiling face. He began stammering, his brain attempting to absorb everything that was happening at the moment.

Oh my god— oh my god— was all he could think of.

“Lady Y/N!” Jean and the others said in unison.

"See you soon," you said quietly, ignoring the people who were approaching you at an incredible pace, giving Timmie one last pat on the head before disappearing to slap someone with a fried egg somewhere else.

Because seriously, why is everyone so clingy to you when it comes to you? Can't a protector have a little peace in their lives?

Timmie stood motionless, a vision in his hands while his mind went haywire.

Daddy, daddy, I think I just met a God!

“Protecto—”

Before they even had a chance to finish their sentence, a fried egg came flying at them at a high rate of speed, and the runny egg yolk came splattering into their face.

You mumbled something under your breath while opening your eyes with a weary expression and blinking several times in an effort to clear the haze from your vision. They just can't seem to give you some space, even if it's just for a moment, can they not? You're literally trying to get some sleep!

The abyss mage who had just been smacked by a fried egg started to emit light as though the curse was in the process of being broken. Something shattered inside of their soul as they shed the last bit of monstrosity that had clung onto them for hundreds of years.

You found a comfortable position on the grass and leaned back against the tree. And off to the side of your vision, you can make out a woman with blond hair who is dressed in white and blue.

You fixed your attention on her, and by the expression on her face, you could see how genuinely surprised she was by what she had witnessed. Her eyes gleamed with much interest and reverence as they locked onto yours.

You immediately felt an inside sigh of frustration when you realize that you’re going to have another traveler who will try to cling onto you.

Lumine suddenly stepped up, and her voice is just as endearing as that of her twin brother. 

"It is an honor to meet our savior," she said. It was a display of respect, but you are too sharp to even believe those words. You are their savior, but that does not imply that they are obligated to treat you with the utmost respect.

You responded with a faint hum as you quickly pulled an abyss mage close to you to use as a pillow, unaware to the jealous stares that Lumine was giving you. 

“Are you here to meet with your twin?”

“I am not… ready to face him,” Lumine whispered softly while her face distorted into an agonized expression, as if she were thinking back on the times she spent with her twin brother.

"Help him with Dvalin," you said, your cheek resting on the back of your hand. You almost laughed when you saw her slightly frown at you. They were the ones that made Dvalin act like that, thus they should be the ones to clean up their mess.

“But—”

"I'm posing as your twin's guide right now, and if this storm terror problem isn't fixed by the end of the week, how am I meant to leave Mondstadt to search for and save the people of your nation?"

"I absolutely want to retire, sigh..." you mumbled, squeezing the abyss mage's cheeks in frustration.

"I suppose you have a point," Lumine answered, nodding her head in understanding. Maybe she can even take a break and check how her twin brother is doing in this world.

"Wonderful, you finally understand!" You replied enthusiastically, and your smile is so dazzling that Lumine feels like she's staring directly into the sun.

"Then, after cleaning up the mess that Celestia made, the two of you can leave Teyvat and continue on your journey."

“Perhaps after you've completed your journey in this world, I can go get some wine, retire, eh... maybe mingle with the humans and spend time with Venti, and...” You started rambling, not noticing how Lumine's face darkened at your words, suggesting that they should leave this world and continue their journey in another.

And Venti? That Barbatos? Lumine fumed whilst you are clueless that your little floatie had earned another hater.

And what if she refuses to leave? What if she desires to know more about you? What if Aether and her decide to bring you along with them on their journey across the worlds?

Far above in the clouds, the Celestia added another name to one of their most hated lists.

Barbatos

Archons

Travelers

You coughed and paused, embarrassed to disclose your life plans after retiring. Lumine, on the other hand, appears to be listening attentively, as though unconcerned with the fact that you're essentially begging them to leave.

Sighing heavily, you decided to put your plan of slapping them with a fried egg in the back of your mind and work on properly removing their curse.

Lumine kept an eye on you, observing how sincere you've become in your treatment of her allies. As your look became more serious, your hand smoothly glided to touch them without even a trace of revulsion.

Perhaps the unknown God isn’t going to be the one who will trap them in this world this time. Maybe you will be the new reason, and she will willingly stay just to uncover your mystery.

Aether, my twin brother, how about we postpone our journey for a while? Surely you felt the same way when you first met her?

sumimasorry for the late update, I was busy crying over my artifact substat and made a kazuscara ff instead

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bold users can't be tagged, idk why ;m;

well anyways, after this I'm going to hide, make fried eggs, and do my forgotten comms

[ktzart]

asmodai heart shaped sun glasses :)

this reminds me that I want to let everyone know that like 90% of the time asmodai chooses NOT to appear as his cool flayed skull head form. he can only appear to people in dreams and he has complete control over how he looks in the dreamscape and this is the form he chooses

(+ mac hating him so bad)

[slickfordain]

𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐔, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐊𝐡𝐚𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐢'𝐚𝐡 𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝. 💀💀

Male!reader, cult AU, done with everything reader, Unknown God is called Asmoday— Yandere themed, Khaenri’ah lore theory from diff people implied in by yours truly ✨me/Fyu✨. I made male!reader because fuck I lost all my ask inboxes 😭

Nothing could be more terrifying, than the creator himself finding out about the destruction of Khaenri’ah that had the Archons immediately down on their knees. They were horrified, because, most likely the Archons never wanted to destroy it in the first place— it was Celestia! Surely you’d understand!

…

But all you were doing, was chugging down your cola/Pepsi down your throat, your eyebags being visible;; which was easy enough for you to make a bitch resting face. ❝That was my favorite nation… Took me four years, now it’s ruined…❞ You sounded oh-so Godly upsetting, it’s tearing the Archons’ souls at this. ❝Your grace no! We didn’t mean it, I swear!❞ Barbatos was clinging onto your waist, Beelzebul was clinging onto your arm;; and Morax clung onto the other arm, gently trying to make sure you’re not choking from the drink by now.

❝Your grace we promise it wasn’t our doing…!❞

❝Yes!! Listen to the Shogun! It’s Celestia’s doing! That filthy palace, right?! Asmoday deserves a punishment too!❞ Barbatos agreed with the electro Archon’s words, for the first time, as you gave out a huff at their antics. You’re too tired, too exhausted. ❝Jesus… What’s the point in living if my four years creation is already ruined…❞

Just by hearing that made everyone in Teyvat absolutely mortified. Yes, mind you that not only can the Archons hear this;; but everyone around Teyvat. Since you exist, your voice is simply in everyone’s ears;; especially the unknown God’s.

❝And why the fuck is everyone killing the monsters- my babies used to be humans, everything was so normal— what happened when I died??? 💔💔❞

The Archons couldn’t take it anymore, and bursted into … A waterfall. Their eyes were crying out I tell ya.

❝WAAAAAA— OUR GRACE NO!! I DIDN’T KILL ANYONE I SWEAR;; IT’S ALL MORAX’S FAULT!❞

❝Pardon me? I believe the drunken bard was the one who demolished every single men and women who tried running away, and don’t get me started on the Raiden.❞

❝You dare accusing my sister?! Your grace! I’ve always been loyal to eternity and kept my promise! Do not trust these fools, they’re lying about my sister Makoto!❞

Even their crying was spread throughout Teyvat. And never in anyone’s life in Inazuma, had they thought the Raiden Shogun would be so… Whiny and, well, emotional. Especially in Liyue who has never seen Rex Lapis’ Archon form being this emotional as well. Childe was at the brink of choking and almost dying. /real

Snezhnaya was so close to victory if you took their side as well. The more the Archons fought one another for you, this means you’d love them more. And the more you love them— the more you could destroy Celestia with Tsaritsa!! Hold on I think Tsaritsa is going love love crazy with a huge blush—

But in all honesty, this makes Dainsleif so fucking angry. They DARED casually talking and whining to you as if they can order you around to punish someone! As much as he hates Celestia’s guts, your appearance came first. Filthy Archons… He knew he should’ve tried killing them the day Asmoday’s attack went feral over Khaenri’ah…

And as for Kaeya and Albedo, those two were definitely going to grab Venti and attack him like feral men who’d do anything for their divine. You.

Everyone was so unsure of how to feel about the Archons. Killing a nation because of what? Their nature? If Celestia truly did send them off to kill the innocents… Then that meant… They’ve been killing humans this entire time.

Xiangling and other children are definitely going to throw up from the thought of it, as they have to be comforted by other people who gave them a light pat on the back. Even for Xiao, who has been more traumatized for realizing that the robots were also made from Khaenri’ah to not destroy nations, but to destroy the heavenly principles and Celestia. All this time… They’ve tried attacking innocents who didn’t even try bothering them, they bothered them first.

Yeah. Horrified nations is definitely set upon the place. And I think, Aether is going to take his frustration out on the Archons once they get back. Not only did they not help him to find his sister, Aether has been completely lied to!

But no worries… Aether will be helped by you right? You must be so… Soooooo tired of them… He will do anything in your hands, he will obey, if it meant he could be helped by you. He’d be so blessed if that were to be the case.

If his sister leaves him for the Abyss one more fucking time, he wouldn’t blame her— but would give up at this very point seeing that Lumine wouldn’t choose him over Abyss. Nahida was right. She belonged to this world, and he was just a traveller through different dimensions.

But then… Who was he truly, if Lumine was never from his own world from the beginning? Who was he to you?

He has heard about your story, your tales… How you always wore a cloak with designed hood over your head;; how you died by such brutal creatures who tried taking over Teyvat. You were a pretty boy, that he wasn’t going to lie about. You were strong, a bit too strong. You’re too overpowered that you didn’t even need to lift a finger, just say in your head that you wanna delete someone and boom. Deleted. Completely erased.

(And you don’t even fight, 💀 lucky bastard)

No matter… That was not the time to think about, right?

The nations aren’t even sure anymore if they should forgive the Archons. For they have sinned and destroyed your favorite creations, Khaenri’ah and it’s people. There was no way they’d ever get your forgiveness.

Which is a lie because you would forgive them but you will be so frustrated trying to remake Khaenri’ah ahahaha— oh yeah while also beating Celestia up by deleting it.

Also ew I’m stuck in a restaurant

[tyrantisterror]

Who's THE Devil?

You know, from, like, The Bible?

One of the things the various takes on Hell more or less agree on is that there is one demon among the legions of Hell who more or less reigns supreme - The Devil with a capital The. What they rarely agree on, however, is which devil that is. So, for funsies, let's look at all the candidates for The Devil, shall we?

Belial

The concept of demons arguably predates Abrahamic religions, at least if we take it at its most nebulous definition of "supernatural people from an Other world who are somewhat antagonistic toward humanity." But the more specific and probably more familiar version of them began with The Book of Enoch, one of many texts that were deemed non-canonical by Christians yet still holds a great deal of influence on Christianity as a whole. It's an extended account of the Noah story, positing that a group of angels rebelled against heaven because they wanted to sleep with mortal women, and created a race of giant half-human half-angel offspring called the Nephilim (Goliath, of David and Goliath fame, was one of the nephilim). God wasn't happy with this, and sent the rebel angels to a fiery pit before killing most of the nephilim with the big ol' flood (though Goliath's lineage survived somehow I guess).

It's not quite how most people picture the War in Heaven and rebellion of the angels, but it's nonetheless where that story started, and that makes it important. This is the first take on what would become the classic origin story for demons and Hell itself. And who is the leader of the rebel angels in this story? Why our good friend Belial, of course. Belial would remain a prominent demon from hereafter, but despite having the earliest claim for the crown of The Devil, Belial has not remained the frontrunner in the race, and is generally demoted to just being a high ranking demon, rather than the Highest ranking one.

2. Beelzebub

I've talked about Beelzebub before and I don't want to spend too much time rehashing that post, so brief recap: Beelzebub began as a mean nickname for a god from a rival religion to Judaism who was named Baal Zebul, which means Lord of the Heavenly Place. Baal Zebub, by contrast, means "Lord of the Flies." Eventually Baalzebub becomes Beelzebub and, divorced from the original context of its creation, becomes a character in his own right, being a prominent demon. And because Beelzebub appeared in a lot of texts, many of them very old as demonology go, he became a major competitor for the title of The Devil, and remains so to this day. I think it's partly because the name "Beelzebub" is really fun to say, but the sheer history and volume of demonology texts portraying him as a big, powerful devil also help. In the rare stories where Beelzebub appears but does not get to be The Devil, he's still portrayed as fairly high ranking, with both Milton's Paradise Lost and Marlowe's Faust making him The Devil's right hand demon, second in command of Hell. So even when he loses the crown, Beelzebub takes home a good silver medal

3. Asmodeus

Asmodeus is another of our "predates Christianity" demons, right up there with Beelzebub and Belial, and as far as I can tell from what I've read he was originally intended to be The Devil rather than just a devil. It's kind of right there in the name - "deus" means god, so Asmodeus having that name marks him as a demon who thinks himself equal to God.

(well, ok, there's some debate about the full origin of his name, with some arguing the "deus" part was originally a play on "deva," which in turn is loosely translated as... demon. The fact that Asmodeus's name is pronounced/spelled differently to a preposterous degree is part of why the water is so muddy - Asmoday, Asmodai, Asmodee, Osmodeus, it goes on and on)

One of his better claims to the crown comes from the story of Solomon - you know, the wise king who told people to cut babies in half. Solomon's less canonical feats include enslaving a shitload of demons to build a temple for him by way of the rite of exorcism, using a magic ring and the power of Christ to compel the damned to do manual labor for him. Asmodeus is specifically stated to be the strongest demon he summons in part because he is the King of all Demons, i.e. The Devil - and the other demons weep at the sight of their king being reduced to a slave by mortal hands.

Why is this a strong claim? Because the story of Solomon in turn inspired The Lesser Key of Solomon, a text about using the rite of exorcism to summon and use demons to do your bidding. The Lesser Key of Solomon includes the Ars Goetia, which is basically a big ol' bestiary of demons, and where many of your favorite pop culture demons - like, say, Stolas the owl guy - come from. Being the King of all demons in the story that inspired one of the more thorough and exhaustive lists of demons and their hierarchies should count for a lot.

There's one other great claim to fame Asmodeus has in his favor. While not directly named in Dante's The Divine Comedy, the description Dante gives of Satan's physical appearance matches with the most popular descriptions of Asmodeus - in particular, his three heads, one of which is yellow, one red, and one black. Granted, it'd be more of a smoking gun if one of those heads was a bull and the other a goat, but they're all very ogre-like, so I still think it stands. Dante's Devil is, more likely than not, Asmodeus, and that's a BIG point in Asmodeus's favor.

4. Hades/Pluto

Ok, so, a great deal of the Old Testament was originally written in Greek, and the New Testament was written in Latin, both of which happened when belief in the Olympian Gods was pretty strong. As such, the word "Hades" appears in the Bible a lot when talking about the place where dead people go, though it probably wasn't meant to literally be the same underworld as that in Greco-Roman mythology. Probably.

But because Christianity was spread primarily by the Roman empire once they converted to Christianity, and because Europe ended up getting a centuries-long case of stockholm syndrome for the Roman Empire that involved many people in power declaring that Greco-Roman mythology was super important literature and Latin was the language of God Himself, there is a good chunk of Biblical apocrypha that treats the use of Hades as, well, a literal crossover of sorts. Which is to say that Hades the god is sometimes treated as, like, a figure in Christianity, generally a demon specifically. And because he's, you know, Hades, from, like, The Odyssey, people feel he needs to be prominent. I mean, Hades RULED the underworld in Greek mythology, so if we're stealing him for Christian folklore, he should at least be in upper management, right?

The strongest case for Hades being The Devil comes from The Book of Revelation, one of the few books in the Bible that actually contributes to demonology (despite what people tell you, demons really don't show up in the Bible that much - most of what we think of as iconic demon lore come from non-canonical works). You know the four horsemen of the apocalypse? War, Famine, Plague, and Death, right? HA, WRONG! It's Conquest, War, Famine, and Pestilence & Death, you fake horseman fan. Well, anyway the line that introduces Death/Pestilence & Death ends with "And Hell followed with him." Except, no, not really, because the specific word used is... Hades. "And Hades followed with him." Which, depending on how you want to interpret the line, could very well mean a literal, King of the Underworld Hades.

Of course, the problem with using Revelation as proof is that Revelation itself is pretty unclear on who's leading the forces of evil. Is it the Seven-Headed dragon who's cast out of Heaven at the beginning of the end of the world? Is it the seven headed leopard monster that the dragon gives his crown to? Is it the monster who crawls out of the ground to speak for the seven-headed leopard with the voice of a dragon? Is it Hades? Is it God, the one who's allowing all this violent shit to happen and frequently sending his angels to make it way fucking worse? Who can say.

So, while it's not super common, there are more than a few works where The Devil is none other than Hades himself. Disney... might not have been completely off the mark, I guess?

While I think Hades's claim is pretty weak, I should note that one of the works that puts a LOT of Greek mythology into Hell is none other than Dante's The Divine Comedy. 70% of the demons in Dante's Hell are just Greek monsters, with the remaining few being Asmodeus and some OC demons he made up with portmanteu names a la Pokemon. Notably, Hades is one of those demonized Greek figures - presented as the Judge who decides where in Hell sinners end up based on their crimes. He's not The Devil, though, so while Dante kind of helps Hades's case, he also kind of ends up making a counter argument to it.

5. Abaddon/Apollyon

Ok, so, the word "abaddon" is used in some texts to refer to Hell, and sometimes it's personified as well. It literally means "ruin." Well, in time, Abaddon is personified and become a demon, which should feel like a familiar story to you by this point. And because Abaddon can also literally be Hell itself, it's only natural that some stories posit Abaddon the demon as the rule of Hell, much as Hades is the ruler of Hades in Greek mythology. This is Abaddon's big claim, and it's not bad, but it's not super strong. Nonetheless, it was enough for at least one prominent Christian text, Pilgrim's Progress, to make Abaddon (under one of his synonym names, Apollyon) to be The Devil, so we can give him that too.

6. Sheol

The sections of the Bible that are written in Hebrew use the word "Sheol" to refer to the underworld/afterlife rather than Hades. Now, Judaism doesn't have the same Hell as Christianity, or the same concept of Heaven either for that matter, and Sheol is less a place of torment for the damned and more of a waiting room for the dead to hang out in until the Messiah comes.

Nonetheless, Sheol did get personified like Abaddon and Hades, and that personification (which, in some versions, is a batty old lady, which is fun) later became a demon in its own right, and thus, for the same reasons as Abaddon and Hades, has a claim to being The Devil by dint of also being, you know, Hell itself. Not the strongest, most popular claim, no, but a claim nonetheless.

7. Satan

Feels rather obvious, doesn't it? Ok, so, in The Bible, one of the characters who was retconned into being The Devil is the angel in the Book of Job who takes on the title of Satan. In the original context of the story, "Satan" is not a name, but, again, a title - a job title, really, roughly akin to "prosecuting attorney." The Satan in the Book of Job isn't a rebel angel, but an angel whose job is to argue for the opposing view point to make sure everyone is doing the right thing. Less "The Devil" and more "the devil's advocate."

But! Christians fucking LOVE the devil, and they want more devil in their Bible, so many translations treat (the) Satan not as the hard-working servant of God he was originally written as, but as, you know, The Devil, arch-enemy of God and justice. And so Satan becomes synonymous with The Devil, and over time more and more appearances of The Devil give him the name Satan.

I can see an argument for this being the strongest claim, because the sheer amount of works where "Satan" is treated as The name of The Devil is enormous. But I think it's important to note that many of those works actually treat it as a name for the devil, which is to say, not the only name. I guess a lot of modern works think the name is so commonly used that it lacks its punch, and so they have The Devil pull the "I have many names" schtick to sound more imposing.

8. Lucifer

So there's a part of the Bible that talks about a star falling out of Heaven as a sort of metaphor for how people can fall from grace. Well, good ol' King James translated this as not just a falling star, but specifically The Devil himself, giving him the name Lucifer, which means "light-bringer." The King James translation of the Bible is bad in that it's immensely inaccurate, but good in that it's a beautiful piece of poetry in its own right, and since it had the authority of a goddamn king behind it, it quickly became a prominent Christian text and is still the preferred translation of many Christian sects to this day.

So, you know, that's pretty fucking big as claims go. There is one incredibly prominent (if woefully inaccurate) translation of the Bible where Lucifer is The Devil. Kind of hard to fight that one.

But it doesn't end there! I would argue that the most influential origin story for Christian devils, the one that has become ingrained in the cultural consciousness as THE story of the War in Heaven, is Milton's poem Paradise Lost. That's where most of the tropes we associate with The Devil and demons and Hell really come together to form the great devil mythology - well, it and Dante's The Divine Comedy, anyway. You know which name Milton chose for The Devil?

Lucifer.

Well, ok, he also calls Lucifer "Satan" with about equal frequency, but still - Lucifer is The Devil of Paradise Lost. And because of the sheer weight that both Paradise Lost and the King James Bible have in culture, Lucifer has ended up being used as The Devil in countless works since! Not bad for a translation error, right?

While the sheer number and notability of literature that uses Lucifer as The Devil is kind of argument enough for him having the best claim, I'd like to add one more argument in his favor: dramatic irony. I think what draws people to Lucifer is the meaning of his name - "the light-bringer" - and how it contrasts with his role as the king of a pit of darkness and misery. "Light-bringer" is a heroic name, the name of a character who brings hope and joy, which makes it so delicious when it turns out our "light-bringer" is an utter bastard. It's just irresistible, isn't it?

9. Mephistopheles

A good number of demon stories - arguably the majority of them - focus on mortals who make deals with demons and end up damned to Hell for doing it. We call these stories "faustian pacts," and we do that because the most famous story of this kind is the story of Faust, a scientist/alchemist who makes a deal with a devil named Mephistopheles to learn the secrets of the universe and ends up doing a lot of sinning in the process. Since Faust is such a famous and influential story, it only follows that its main devil is frequently viewed as The Devil.

...except

In most versions of Faust, Mephistopheles is not presented as The Devil within the narrative. He's a henchman, a flunkie, with one of the bigger names like Lucifer or Beelzebub pulling the strings. So while there are a number of stories (including a few versions of Faust itself) where Mephistopheles gets to be The Devil, it's far more common for him to be a devil - perhaps a prominent devil, maybe even one of the strongest and a close member of The Devil's inner circle, but rarely the one in charge.

10. Baphomet

Baphomet is a god whose name and appearance was repurposed as a demon by The Church of Satan, and so while I have to admit that is a claim to the crown, I don't think it's a great one. First, nothing about the Church of Satan's belief system is meant to be taken genuinely, with them admitting that they view Satan/Baphomet as a symbol rather than a literal supernatural being they believe in. Second, by rights Baphomet should be allowed to be Baphomet instead of being literally demonized. I honestly think it's better for Baphomet to lose this race than to win it.

11. Iblis

Demons in Islam work differently from demons in Christianity. Rather than being fallen angels, demons are wicked Djinn - a race of people made from fire and smoke rather than ash and dirt like humans. Djinn aren't quite as powerful as angels in Islam, but do have significant supernatural powers that humans lack. Like humans, Djinn have free will and can choose whether to be good or evil - and those that choose to be evil reside in Islam's version of Hell, where they are ruled by Iblis, the first Djinn to choose the wicked path and the ruler of Islam's Hell.

Unlike Christianity, there isn't really any debate on this. Iblis is, for all intents and purposes, the CANONICAL ruler of Hell, The Devil of Islam, and thus has the strongest and really ONLY claim to be The Devil of that religion.

...but, at the same time, Iblis can't really be the Christian devil, because Christianity doesn't have Djinn, and all the iconic parts of Christian demonology kind of hinge on the idea of demons as rebel angels, which demonic djinn very much aren't. So while Iblis's claim in Islam is irefutable, he doesn't have one in Christianity. Ain't that wacky?

I think it should be noted that there are more-or-less canonical texts where Iblis isn't treated as purely evil, either, including one where he actively asks for help in repenting and is turned down because, well, evil has to exist, and someone has to rule over it, and like it or not, that's Iblis's job now. It ends with Iblis wailing that he has become the greatest martyr of Islam. Which is so fucking hardcore, I love it. In Christianity, the texts where we humanized demons are non-canonical at best and deemed heresy at worst, but Islam allowed it to be more-or-less canon. They saw the coolest takes on the Devil and said "yeah we can allow that" - so much more rad than what Christianity did with them.

~

~

~

So, who do YOU think is The Devil? You know, from, like, The Bible?

[turtleybeachin]

Some of the holidays people keep adding to the shared family calendar used by the House of Lamentation/Demon Lord's Castle/Cocytus Hall, as inspired by the "What Day Is It Today" widget in Nightbringer:

It's the Season 5 premiere for Help, I Got Sucked Into An Otome Game That's Sort of about Biblical Figures Except They're All Hot and Oddly Much Kinder than Expected and Now I'm in Love with All of Them tonight and we're having a watch party day! (Nobody read the whole event title and there was a unanimous decision in the group chat to not have holiday titles more than two lines long ever again)

Give your favorite second eldest brother all your money day! (it's a recurring holiday)

Announcements for book releases that also include a Do Not Disturb alert for Satan for the next 14 hours.

"Make a Pact with Solomon Day!" keeps showing up, and Solomon laughs every time and wonders loudly who would make such a holiday, then wonders equally loudly if Lucifer plans to celebrate it.

Simeon keeps accidentally using the calendar as his reminders, so everyone knows when he needs more toothpaste, has a question for Lucifer, or needs to talk to Luke about getting to bed on time.

"Official AsmoDay!!! ♥" with suggestions for ways to love and adore the Asmo in your life. it's also a recurring holiday.

Diavolo keeps fanboying shamelessly in the calendar with "Admire Lucifer's Eyes in Flickering Candlelight" day, and "Give Lucifer a Foot Rub Day".

every now and then Barbatos joins in but it's things like "The Young Master Does Not Climb Out of His Office Window to Avoid Doing His Work Day", because he saw 43 new holidays being added over the next two months specifically honoring Lucifer and had a feeling someone was avoiding their paperwork.

Lucifer muted the calendar to stop getting the annoying pings and pop-ups, but he still scrolls through it every morning to decide how stressed he'll be that day.

[thrashkink-coven]

I love having witchy conversations with other demonolaters on apps like Instagram because it ALWAYS goes something like this.

Them: omg Lord Asmoday is being so cute lately idk why but I keep having dreams about him leaving flowers by my window

Me: oh wow that’s so cool!! sometimes I have dreams about Lucifer leaving me roses on my altar

Them: Ohhhh my godss that’s so wonderful

Random ass person: UM! WTF? YOU GUYS WORSHIP DEMONS?? YOU GUYS ARE INSANE. YOU MUST SERIOUSLY BE ON DRUGS IF YOU THINK A DEMON IS GOING TO TALK TO YOU

Me: 😐

Them: 😐

Me: so anyways I had a dream that Lucifer appeared to me as a swan

Them: OMG what happened next

[ajxrn]

Random Paimon theory, I've been thinking about genshin lore a lot so why not post this? I need to look further into lore as someone wanting to be a lore player, and don't know too deep lore regarding the gods and stuff atm so forgive any mistakes.

Long theory ramble underneath the cut!

I just watched a YouTube video mentioning the meaning behind the triquetra in genshin. Normally, it stands for a trinity of something, often the holy trinity. The guy mentioned the moon sisters theory, but I’m setting that one aside because I don’t know about the moon sisters and seelie story very well and the theory doesn’t hold as well imo.

On paimons outfit, there is a reverse triquetra. This usually signifies the opposite of whatever the normal triquetra means. The guy in the video mentions that we don’t know what the triquetra in this case would be, unless we look at the Genius invokation TCG game. There seems to be something called an Omni-element, which uses the symbol of the triquetra on it. It’s a combination of all elements, and is meant to be a sort of “light” element in genshin.

So if the triquetra stands for light in genshin, what would the opposite of that be? Darkness, or, the abyss. This ties into my own observation I made about Paimon. Now we all think she has ties to the heavenly principles & unknown god (asmoday), but what if Paimon isn’t a light being from celestia? What if she has closer ties to the abyss? So how does this hold up?

First, her name. Paimon. Paimon was a demon king who had close ties to Lucifer. Why would she have a demon name? The archons as well as the unknown god (asmoday sounds like asmodeus) have demon like names as well, which makes it even more compelling.

(^taken from Wikipedia)

Now let’s look at Paimon’s eyes. We all know what the abyss looks like now, having seen it various times. Why do Paimon’s eyes look eerily similar to the abyss? Why does nobody talk about that, actually? It’s really intriguing. She definitely has something going on and I’m curious about it. What conflicts this theory is the fact Paimon looks insanely similar to the unknown god as well. She definitely has ties to celestia, but why the abyss symbolism? Was she banished? Perhaps she sinned?

I haven’t ever seen anyone mention this and I think it’s really cool :( Paimons eyes look eerily similar to the abyss and it makes me question a lot of stuff, hence this theory post in the first place.

Another addition to this is Mona’s voiceline about Paimon, stating how she just can’t get any information about her, just like how Mona can’t get information about traveler, but this is because they aren’t from teyvat. However, Paimon IS from Teyvat, as her memories were wiped by Irminsul like everyone else’s during the Sumeru quests. 

(It sort of leads me to think something similar is going on with the Abyss sibling, since they apparently are from Teyvat, despite actually being an outsider, making them not be one of the descenders?)

Oh you know what’s weirder? The Chinese name for Genshin: 原神 (Yuán shén) means original god, like I mentioned earlier. However, if you flip the characters with eachother, it’s spelt: 神原 (Shén yuán) which HAPPENS to mean abyss in Chinese? Interesting…

Something is definitely going on with Paimon and I am really interested in finding out. Honestly, I really hate the Paimon = unknown god theory, but I do believe Paimon has a connection to her or is maybe a former god/deity herself? Especially because of the whole “unknown god” and “abyss” name thing, which sort of ties into genshins logo having Paimons circlet/halo on it. (Which could just be because she’s the mascot but shh let me have this)

anyways! What do you guys think? (Please be nice about this Ive only been playing since April last year and idk too much in-depth lore stuff!! This is just a fun theory I thought over. A GAME THEORY)

[luckbell-art]

Buddyfight Headcanons ‘Cause I can’t get this series out of my head

Balle du Soleil Edition (?)

Humans:

I have no headcanons for Gao sorry

Baku is secretly jealous of other men that get close to Kuguru due to him want that strong bond with her.

Kuguru has a secret sadistic side she keeps under lock and key. Only Baku knows the true extent of her nature.

Kuguru’s headlamps are a pain to put on the morning, taking more than 30 minutes just to put them on. Despite this, her hair is very well kept. Her and Zanya share their hair care tips because of it.

Whenever Kuguru sees Zanya pulling Akatsuki’s ear, she whips out the chancleta and beats the ever loving tar out of him.

Baku: Uhm, I think you got him, Kuguru.

Kuguru, holding a bloody sandal: You want what he’s having?

Baku: N-no…

Kuguru: That’s what I thought.

Zanya: *screams of pure terror*

Tetsuya is actually really smart. He could easily make straight A’s, but chooses to be lazy. Asmodai is both amazed and stumped by this.

Gao: Hey Zanya, do you know what the square root of this is?

Tetsuya, from across the room: It’s 24.

Gao and Zanya: …

Zanya: How are you still in tutoring?!

Tetsuya’s father left him and his mother when he was young. While he doesn’t mind as much anymore, he gets jealous when his friend talk about their fathers.

Zanya’s some form of gay, I don’t make the rules

Zanya’s also the resident babysitter I still don’t make the rules

Zanya used to be afraid of everyone as kid. Not just women, everyone. He later got diagnosed with social anxiety disorder. His current gynophobia is considered an improvement.

When nervous, Zanya either fidgets with his hair or with a ring Akatsuki bought him on his birthday. He keeps the ring on a necklace hidden in his coat.

Despite what he might say, Zanya appreciates when people understand his disorder and don’t try and push boundaries with him.

Akatsuki and Hanako are best friends. They love hanging out and switch up who’s house their going to after school often.

Akatsuki’s extremely gullible. If you tell him clouds are cotton candy, he’ll believe until proven otherwise.

Akatsuki’s the sugar addict in the family. There’s a reason the cookie car is hidden on top of the fridge.

Monsters:

Drum actually has mechanical knowledge and can fix any engine he finds. How else is supposed to maintain his drill?

The day found pre-made pudding is the day Drum was in heaven. It was also the day he learned just how many preservatives are in packaged food.

While he technically doesn’t need the money, Asmodai takes on multiple jobs just for the hell of it.

Despite appearing very chill, Asmodai’s constantly stressed worried about Tetsuya’s wellbeing, especially after the omni lord reveal.

Tsukikage knows JSL and uses it to talk smack about people since a very few people actually practice sign language in Japan.

Tsukikage loves to dote on Byakuya unprompted. It once got to the point where he had to be stopped from buying tickets to Coachella the moment they went on sale.

Part 2 maybe…?

[silverthornwitchery]

My Experience with King Asmoday (or how Asmodeus saved my life)

Trigger Warnings: suicide ideation

I've always struggled with my mental health since childhood, and spirituality has been a huge help in the healing process.

One night I was having trouble sleeping, so I tried to meditate to help. No matter what I did, I couldn't quiet my head, and began to spiral, immensely badly too. It was to the point where I was genuinely planning out what I'd say in a letter, and how I'd do it. By far, the worst I had been since highschool. If im being honest I can't really remember what triggered it.

Through it all though, King Asmoday managed to break through into my meditation. I've been working with him since 2020, albeit I had stepped away from demonolatry for a while at the time of this incident.

He was gentle with me, but showed me the aftermath of what would happen if I were to end my own life. He showed me the grief and pain others would have to deal with. He knew I didn't truly want to die, and that I didn't want others to suffer because of me. It was a brutal vision, but it was needed. It snapped me out of it, and he talked me down, comforting me and consoling me, making sure I got the rest I needed.

I genuinely think I would have attempted if he hadn't stepped in. That night really put things into perspective for me, and whenever my head gets ahead of me, I've been able to fight off any thoughts of harming myself with relative ease.

Thank you, King Asmodeus, for saving my life that night.

[willysillywow]

Talking about this silly man's design 💙💜

So I'm gonna compare him to the depiction in the Lesser Key of Solomon first because that's like the most 'respected' sorce lmao

So, in the Lesser Key, he's described as having three heads, one bull, one man, one ram, and breathing fire from his mouth. I personally enjoy the way Viv cartoonized the three heads thing with making them tiny. And I think his hair being fire was a really clever way of working that part in and making it cohesive with the humanoid style of HB.

Lesser Key also states that he's good with handicrafts, which I think could be tied in with him making sex toys (aside from it being a kinda obvious thing to do 😅)

This is the sigil of Asmoday in the Lesser Key!

And this is Asmodeus' sigil in Helluva!

As you can see, they are almost identical other than the circle and name around them!

This is what he could've looked like lmfaoooo

End of discussion 🤞💜💙

[still-a-morosexual-help]

if you don't mind (and you have time), could you explain a little bit about the story with solomon, asmo, and the ocean? or at least tell us where a good place to read about it is? I've tried to look into the actual stories of who the characters are based off of but it's honestly really hard to even know where to start because there's just so much to it 😭 but the stories seem so interesting especially the stuff between asmo and solomon

My original source is "I read this in a friend's religious text (?) when I was a teenager and it stuck with me" but here's some actual online places that cover the story of Solomon & Asmodeus.

*None of these stories are the ones I grew up with (i was raised buddhist) & none of these sites are ones I'm familiar with so I don't know how valid/reliable the sources are. If anyone has better sources feel free to drop a link in the replies

I'm only adding short parts from each site to this post and I'd highly recommend reading the whole thing if anyone is interested

"Confident of his own power, Solomon granted Ashmedai's wish. Instantly the demon seized the king's crown, and with a single flick of his powerful wing, hurled Solomon four hundred miles from Jerusalem.

Ashmedai then flung Solomon's magic ring into the sea, where it was swallowed by a fish. For Ashmedai thought, "If anyone should gain possession of the ring, he will know what I have done."

Then the Demon King disguised himself as Solomon and sat down upon his golden throne."

-Jewish Heritage Online Magazine

"Ashmedai remained with Solomon until the Temple was completed. One day the king told him that he did not understand wherein the greatness of the demons lay, if their king could be kept in bonds by a mortal. Ashmedai replied that if Solomon would remove his chains and lend him the magic ring, he (Ashmedai) would prove his own greatness. Solomon agreed. The demon then stood before him with one wing touching heaven, and the other reaching to the earth. Snatching up Solomon, who had parted with his protecting ring, he flung him four hundred parasangs away from Jerusalem, and then palmed himself off as the king."

-Jewish Encyclopedia

Another Talmudic legend has King Solomon tricking Asmodai into collaborating in the construction of the Temple of Jerusalem[4] (see: The Story of King Solomon and Ashmedai).

Another legend depicts Asmodai throwing King Solomon over 400 leagues away from the capital by putting one wing on the ground and the other stretched skyward.

-Wikipedia

Solomon - Britannica

*The original text I read as a teenager said Solomon himself was flung into the ocean? But none of these mention that. Then again I read that about a whole decade ago so it's highly probable I'm misremembering. But also (at least with Buddhism*) small details like that tend to differ depending on where you find the text and when you read it

eg: *did you know in some buddhist texts the horse no longer dies!!? Because apparently it makes children too sad!!?? You're telling me I had to sob my little 7yr old heart out in an art museum over this horse and kids nowadays don't get to experience that devastating heartbreak!?? That kick to the teeth!? The nerve! Why did my generation have to suffer like this!? Kids these days don't know how good they have it! Why I oughta-

anyway-

Honestly I think the easiest and most comprehensive way to digest these stories if you want to know more but are overwhelmed by how vast and interconnected they are is by finding a good reliable youtube channel that talks about them

Here are some channels that I've watched before & some I haven't (so I can't vouch for them) but are popular & cover those topics:

•ESOTERICA

• Mr. Mythos

• Mythology & Fiction Explained (subscribed/watched)

• Mythology- Folklore A-Z

• Overly Sarcastic Productions (subscribed/watched)

• See U in History / Mythology (subscribed/watched)

• Storied (subscribed/watched)

• The Legends of History

Hope this helps!

[sena-shi]

Protector of Teyvat (a troll hell-bent on reviving everyone just for fun) P—2

Isekai’d reader who is hell-bent on reviving everyone using your cheat code as the protector of Teyvat. With great power comes great benefits! Teyvat population stonks

Note: asmoday is the unknown god, reader also grants gnosis and visions, isekai, slight sagau, op reader

Summary: You are just a regular human being living your best life on Earth, collecting husbandos and waifus in Genshin Impact when all of a sudden you were isekai'd to Teyvat, but not as a traveler, a creator, or an NPC. You were a very close friend of both Celestia and the Unknown God, who is known as the Sustainer of Heavenly Principles. You too, hold a very important position of the highest order because unbeknownst to the general populace, you are the Protector of Teyvat from the outside forces. And so imagine the Archon's faces when their dead friend suddenly came back to life just so they can accompany you together with Aether and Paimon on a journey to spit on the Celestia's face

Timeline in Teyvat when you got transmigrated: Before any wars happened. Zhongli is probably sucking on a dragon pacifier or something if that even exists.

Warning: curse words, slight ooc, lore flying over the ocean and going for a swim, author removed the lore from the irminsul so act like you know nothing of it, i'm putting the lore in the cheese grater

“T-The hilichurls… turned into humans?” Because of what she had just seen, Amber's eyes were completely expanded, and you could almost get the impression that she was on the verge of exploding any moment now.

You find yourself thinking that it is understandable. After all, raising someone from the dead isn't something that happens very often; in fact, not even archons are able to do it.

You chuckled and smiled sarcastically at the three people who were staring at you in complete and utter disbelief.

You stood there with your arms crossed as you looked over at the hilichurls that had been transformed into humans with confused expressions adorning their faces.

"Oh wow…" You said while putting on a show of ignorance regarding what had just taken place. "What a miracle it is that they have been brought back to life!" You delighted everyone by clapping your hands.

"P-Paimon was very certain that it was Y/N who brought them back to life just now..." Paimon mumbled something to herself as she scratched the top of her head.

“Hm? That is ridiculous. I just smacked them across the face with a fried egg, see?" You answered as you moved closer to the hilichurls that had been converted into humans by slapping their faces with a fried egg that suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

And as a matter of fact, a noticeable improvement could be seen in the appearance of the other people's skin after the fried egg had been applied to their faces. They let out a sigh of disgust as they observed the yolk splattered all over their faces.

"Paimon had no idea that a fried egg was capable of doing that..."

Aether shook his head at the innocence of his traveling buddy. It was perfectly clear that you were making light of the situation. At least now he is aware that you were telling the truth when you stated that you allowed the Anemo Archon to have a seat in the seven.

“This—” Amber opened her mouth to speak while simultaneously covered her mouth with her palm in shock. "This is really incredible news! You are able to give them a second chance at life!"

"What caused them to become humans?" Aether questioned while frowning in confusion.

You gave a light hum as you brought your hand up to pet him on the top of his head. "Perhaps your sister knows the answer you're looking for.”

“Our benefactor…” As soon as you turned your attention to them, they started talking, and Aether made a low rumbling sound.

You gave them a sideways glance while turning your head to the side since you thought it was likely that they were bewildered by the situation. Their final recollections would be of fighting for their homeland just before the curse took full impact.

They all got on one knee in front of you, which caused you to raise an eyebrow.

"Ah-ah, there's no need to be grateful to me. You probably aren't aware of this, but I'm a very awful person.” You said with a playful tone.

The people around you gave you a disapproving shake of the head as they expressed their dissatisfaction. Who in the devil would even believe a statement like that after what you have done?

“We were in such a painful dream— we are gratefu—"

You made a huffing sound while crossing your arms. "I find it extremely unpleasant when people thank me or express gratitude in any form. You deserve to live, no? I was only performing my duties at the time."

"Paimon speculates that Y/N is simply not accustomed to being thanked at...?"

You let out a sigh and shook your head in a deliberate manner. You looked down at them and they immediately thanked whichever gods were responsible for allowing them the opportunity to finally take a good look at the face of the one who had helped them.

They feel as though fortune was on their side because a God gazed at them with such kindness in their eyes, despite the fact that they were literally citizens from a nation that does not worship any gods.

"How can we possibly repay you...?"

You cocked your head to the side and hummed to yourself while you started to think.

“Brace yourselves.” You spoke.

“Wha—?”

"Oh, wait, here, have this." You smiled broadly as a variety of visions comprising a range of elements appeared seemingly out of thin air.

They did nothing but blink in bewilderment as they held the small vision in their hands, looking like toddlers who had been given machine guns.

At this very moment, Amber was on the verge of passing out. Witnessing a group of individuals all at once getting their visions is unsettling to say the least. It feels even more wrong to breathe the same air as you!

Oh, my archons, her life is not a sufficient payment to be able to witness such a once-in-a-lifetime event!

 “Let’s all hang out once in awhile, hm? Don’t forget to say hello to Lulu for me!”

Aether raised a brow. Lulu?

With a wave of your hand, they vanished into thin air, and you sent them to a place where Lumine and the Abyss Order are currently staying.

To say that Lumine was horrified to the core when a group of humans suddenly appeared above the head of the abyss mage who was just talking to her would be an enormous understatement.

"Y-You can grant visions too!?" The scream that Paimon let out was so loud that it made you wince.

“Sorry!”

You indicated with a wave of your hand that everything was fine, and Paimon immediately let out a sigh of relief.

"Aether, do you know her, or is she a stranger?" Amber's lips were covered as she leaned in close to the man and mumbled something. In response, he gave a nod that conveyed something close to uncertainty.

You snorted as you extended your hand in front of Paimon and insisted that she give you, her hand. And as she did, a gnosis appeared in your hand.

"Oh, my dear archons!" Paimon reacted, fixating her gaze intently on the bright object that was floating directly above your palm.

"If we were to sell this, we could make a ton of Mora!"

“What—!?” Amber and Aether shouted at the same time.

You blinked and stroked your chin with your index finger as if you were considering what you had just heard. "If I remember correctly, there was a term for buy one and get one free. What if we double it?"

"No no no! Paimon is not even certain that there is a single person in Teyvat who can afford a gnosis! In addition to that, don't you think the other archons will feel uncomfortable about it?”

"Why should we worry about how they feel?" You huffed as you continued, "The one ruling Inazuma handed her gnosis to a friend, the one ruling Mondstadt doesn't even use it, and the one ruling Liyue will probably give up his gnosis in the near future.

"Well, if we're talking about the wealthiest individual in Teyvat right this minute..." You made a soft mumbling sound.

“Should we offer it for sale to the Tsaritsa? You smiled mischievously while cocking your head ever-so-slightly to the side.

As soon as you uttered that, an excruciating ringing sound immediately started up in your head. You gritted your teeth and squeezed one of your eyes shut.

“Y/N, are you okay?” You heard Aether’s worried voice.

"I thought we were each other's best friends! You should be aware that she wants a fight with me!” You can clearly hear Celestia nitpicking away inside of your head. As is her custom, she is highly dramatic.

“Well, it’s partly your fault that she wants to fight you.”

The three looked at you in surprise and astonishment as your choice of words came out of nowhere. To silence them, all you did was give them your whole attention while pressing a finger to your lips.

“Hmph…” You could hear her dejected voice.

“Oh hush, you have me. Just let them do their own thing for now.”

“Alright, but why are you selling a gnosis?”

"Creating a strategy for one's own survival is the first step toward leading a more fulfilling life," After having a good laugh, you promptly severed your connection with the Celestia before she could even begin to complain again.

“At least come visit us—!”

Oh, your closest friends and their overprotective tendencies when it comes to you. Why won't they just let you breathe and stop figuratively and physically clutching onto you for dear life?

"Your highness, who were you speaking with only a moment ago?" Amber stuttered, and for some reason, despite her outgoing nature, she found herself experiencing sudden feelings of shyness. I mean, really, how could you possibly hold that against her?

She hasn't even entertained the thought of speaking with an archon, and yet here she is having a conversation with someone who is significantly more powerful than the archons!

“Oh please, Y/N is fine,” you gave her a friendly smile and told her, “The Celestia is in full support of our business!”

They were all shocked beyond belief and let out a collective gasp.

As they imagined every people of Teyvat holding a gnosis, everyone in the room began to break out in a cold sweat at the back of their necks. You couldn't possibly be serious, could you? Surely you must have been joking. Right?

You met three new people along the way, and the four of you set off on a journey to the city that is known for its freedom. They all came to an agreement that the information on your identity and the incident with the hilichurls should not be shared with anybody else.

You trailed closely behind them, periodically turning your head to take in the beautiful surroundings and the people who belonged to your little archon.

“Let me officially introduce the city of wind, dandelions, and freedom— Travelers under the protection of the Knights of Favonius — Welcome to Mondstadt!” Amber grinned broadly as she placed her hand on her chest and cupped her other hand on her hip.

"O-Oh, not that her highness Y/N doesn't already know about Mondstadt...” Amber massaged the back of her head nervously as you made her blush with your laughter.

"I don't. I didn't have enough time to look into it, so I'm grateful for the introduction. Mm, the only figure of this nation that I am familiar with is the archon,” You were able to make her feel better with the words that you spoke, and now Amber can be seen beaming with happiness once more.

That, as well, is a blatant lie. You have completed so many commissions in this nation while you were still a player, so of course you are familiar with every nook and cranny of this city.

You didn't say anything while Amber and Paimon went into great length explaining things to Aether; the only thing you did was hum sometimes in reaction to what they were saying.

You were on the sidelines as Aether received his wind glider and put it through its trials for the first time, which resulted in a successful outcome.

Ha, that kid used to fly around with his very own set of wings before.

You swung your legs around gleefully as you sat precariously perched over the railings.

It is only a matter of time before the city is shrouded by ominous clouds and Dvalin makes another appearance. This means that you will be able to see your little floatie as well.

Aether descended toward Amber, who was standing there waiting for him once more, as the three of them observed that thick clouds and fog had begun to cover the skies above Mondstadt.

“The sky...” Amber uttered those words with a note of apprehension.

People immediately began fleeing to safer areas as Aether and Amber gazed up at you with worried expressions on their faces, as if pleading with you to take some action.

You only smiled at them before speaking the words, “The stormterror is absolutely adorable, no doubt about it, no?

“E—Eh!?” Your response caused Paimon to exclaim, and at that very moment, a wind tornado was closing in on them and ultimately launched Aether into the air.

You heaved a sigh as you stood up from the rails, your palm shining with some unknown power as a barrier began to enclose the city and prevent any harm from approaching.

You sighed again as you began to protect the citizens of the city. However, since you didn't make an effort to clear away the fog, everything will continue to be a mystery.

You cast your sight upward, in the direction of where Aether is floating in the air thanks to Venti's power, and the two people who were observing you followed your gaze in that direction.

"Don't worry, your highness! We will be all right!"

You couldn't help but laugh as you soared to the location of Aether, where you could sense Venti disguising as one of the thousand winds.

“I’m preventing your fall with the power of a thousand winds.”

“Oh? Little floatie came into rescue too?” You teased as the mysterious voice began stammering.

“L-Little floatie…?”

"Alright, alright, let's concentrate on this," You gave Aether a friendly smile while you ruffled his silky locks with your fingertips.

"Don't worry about a thing; little floatie will look after you."

Aether frowned, indicating that he found the idea quite unappealing. "How about you?"

You hummed as you sensed the wind from Venti moving closer to you as though it was also interested in you.

"I'm quite curious to find out if slapping a fried egg on the stormterror's blood clot will be of any assistance."

Aether's jaw dropped in disbelief. You’re still not done with the fried eggs!?

"Hey, what do you think of this idea, little floatie?"

The mysterious voice heaved a cough and mumbled, "Eh..."

After hearing their response, you rolled your eyes at them. They had a feeling that you wouldn't be speaking anytime soon, so Venti made the decision to explain how to make use of the power.

You were observing everything that was going on around Aether as he started to harness the power of the wind.

You made a few comments about how the wind power looked like a machine gun which made Venti cough multiple times to hide his laughter.

“Not enough. Do you want me to slap you with an almond tofu for an increased damage?”

“W—What?”

You didn't bother to wait for his approval before presenting him with the plate of almond tofu that magically emerged in your hands and then you gently slapped it in front of his face.

It was such a surprising thing that you could practically feel Venti shaking, which almost caused him to lose control of the wind. It was that shocking.

As Aether took the final shot, Dvalin let out a roar, and you swiftly flew over to the dragon, which appeared to be about to collapse as it was shaking in the wind.

Venti stayed only long enough to watch the softening of your eyes as you stared at the blood clot on the dragon's back. Aether slowly flew down to the area where the others are, but Venti did not leave.

He watched as your bright hands gently caressed the dark crystal, which immediately silenced the dragon's roaring.

You were reluctant to completely remove the blood clot because it was Venti and Aether's responsibility to do it. However, because you are so compassionate toward individuals who are suffering, all you did was relieve the discomfort that the dragon was experiencing.

It is completely up to destiny to decide whether or not the abyss mage will still be able to exert control over the dragon.

"Little floatie," You moved your attention to the wind that was swirling. "The traveler is known to be trustworthy. I have complete faith that you are aware of the next steps."

The strong wind has started to die down, and the only sound that can be heard out is a faint “thank you.”

You led the weakened dragon back to the ground, and as soon as the two of you landed, three abyss mages suddenly appeared. You grimaced when you realized that Lumine must have sent them to seek you out.

"Our gracious benefactor," An abyss mage started things off. "Our princess would want to offer her sincere gratitude to—"

You heaved a sigh as you frowned and crossed your arms while looking at them. "I believed that I conveyed to them that receiving gratitude is not something that I like in any way,"

“Uh… they may have mentioned that.”

You gave your temples a light massage as the headache began to set in and asked, "So why are you here?"

"We would like to make a request that you lend us a hand in the restoration of our once-thriving nation and in rescuing its people from the curse."

"Oh, I had already made preparations to carry out that task," You gave your response, and then proceeded to yawn.

If only they knew that your two friends were the cause of their fall, they probably wouldn't be as friendly with you as they are now if they knew that.

As they drifted closer to you, the abyss mages showed signs of happiness; however, when they heard your next words, "But not right now," their happiness quickly turned to disappointment, and they almost plummeted to the ground.

“But— why?”

"Of what use is a nation if it does not have its people?" As you lounged contentedly on Dvalin's back, a sluggish expression began to appear on your face.

“So…”

"If I happen to come across one of your own, you can rest assured that I will deliver them to your princess so that she may deal with them." You uttered those words in a languid manner while staring at them. "Focus on gathering your people, since your nation will not all of a sudden grow a foot and run anyways." 

"We are in all sincerity grateful for—"

“Hush.”

They abruptly stopped speaking once they were reminded that you do not enjoy receiving gratitude or hearing thank yous in any form.

You are truly a weird God— they think. But kind like their princess, nonetheless.

“Then we shall return.”

You made a careless motion with your hand, indicating for them to leave immediately.

“Tell your princess that she should at least pay a visit to her twin, and if she does that, maybe I'll feel more motivated to assist you.”

Your level of excitement and enthusiasm is to be expected, of course. The sooner they come to an understanding with one another, the sooner they will get the fuck out of Teyvat.

That means, you won't have any more job to do. On the other hand, you get the impression that it won't be all that simple.

Not with the looks that Aether was giving you, and not with Lumine's nature, which dictates that she won't stop until she pays back whoever helped her out.

Just hush and go, okay!? What is it that they have planned for the following step? Bring themselves to their knees and make a formal request for your hand in marriage? You let out a sigh as the thought crossed your mind.

In spite of the fact that you intended to rebuild the once-mighty nation, you wanted to execute it in private. There is no question in your mind that once they discovered who their benefactor is, then and only then will they revere that benefactor. What then will become of a nation that does not believe in God or even worship one?

The mages of the abyss remained silent for a short while as they observed various expressions adorning your face. It turned out to be quite comical. It's no surprise that their princess was so interested in interacting with you that she issued a command to find you.

They continued to observe you while you glared, huffed, and grimaced at the ground, and it wasn't until you frowned at them that they eventually left with a quiet "thank you."

You rolled your eyes. “What a bunch of brats.”

As soon as you arrived back in Mondstadt, you saw the three of them speaking to Kaeya. Although the fog has long since dissipated, the sky itself is still completely dark.

As you made your way slowly towards the folks who were introducing themselves, you waved your hand and the barrier vanished before your eyes. 

“This is Kaeya, our Cavalry Captain.” Amber carried on talking as if she had not noticed your presence and proceeded. “These two are travelers from afar, Aether and Paimon.”

Kaeya looked at the two individuals and gave a nod in acknowledgement. He then made direct eye contact with you and asked, "And who might this young lady possibly be?"

Amber's eyes widened as she shifted her gaze back and forth between Kaeya and you. Kaeya saw the outrider's expression, which seemed to indicate that she was at a loss for words regarding how to introduce you.

Your presence elevated the level of excitement that he felt towards everything.

“Oh, I’m Y/N. I sell visions and gnoses.” You responded with an expression on your face that was completely expressionless, and your voice was completely emotionless, which made the situation even more awkward and unbelievable.

The response that you gave seemed to take Kaeya completely by surprise. You? Selling visions? How in the devil is something like that ever feasible? And just what exactly are gnoses?

“Uh… haha…” Amber, at a complete loss for words, scratched the nape of her neck.

"Oh? I had no idea that lady Y/N is such a practical joker,” Even though Kaeya appeared to be laughing, there was not the slightest indication of humor in his voice.

"Uh-huh, you bet! Paimon is in agreement that Y/N has a tendency to joke around quite a bit!” In a frantic effort to salvage the situation, Paimon quickly nodded her head.

"Well, if you want to buy one, all you have to do is ask me..." You just said it while crossing your arms.

“Oh? I was wondering if you could sell me one then." It appeared as though Kaeya was making fun of you with his charming smile; in fact, it almost felt that way.

You seemed curious about something as you cocked your head to the side and then asked, "Don't you already have a vision though?"

"Well, having two would certainly make things more interesting, wouldn't you say?"

You took a moment to think about it before giving your approval with a nod. As you lifted your hands and opened your palms, visions of several elements, each glowing brightly, suddenly appeared.

Huh? He thought you were just joking the whole time!

It would be an understatement to say that Kaeya was caught off guard by the revelation. Are you a fraud? A magician perhaps? However, the visions you are holding exude such an overwhelming amount of power that it is difficult to even consider the possibility that they are a fake.

“Mm, you’re my first customer, so in appreciation of your patronage, I'll give you a discount if you buy Aether and Paimon a meal. Fair trade, don't you think?”

What fair trade? A simple meal in exchange for a vision? Do you not realize that visions are extraordinarily rare, and that the vast majority of people would give anything — including their lives — to receive one?

Of course you're aware of it; you're just messing with them for the sake of witnessing their reactions. It's likely that protecting Teyvat for thousands of years has had an effect on you, as seen by the fact that you're even doing this for no other reason than boredom.

Kaeya remained motionless in his stance; his eyes riveted on the bright visions that had no owner. After snapping out of his trance, he took off his cloak and wrapped it around you in a tender manner.

You made a sound that indicated that you were confused as he said, "Let's continue this conversation to our headquarters."

"Tch, I really need to bring Crepus back to life so that he can scold his children to death."

"Are you going to use fried eggs for that man too?" Paimon inquired, which caused Kaeya's surprise and horror to reach an even higher level.

Too? Does that mean that this wouldn't be your first time bringing someone back to life?

Now, Kaeya is positive that he wishes he could just pass out right there and then.

TAGLIST: @valeriele3 @lunarapple @meikoo

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[psalmsofthefuture]

Introduction.𖥔 ݁ ˖

„𝑰𝒕 𝒊𝒔 𝒂 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒂𝒄𝒒𝒖𝒂𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖. 𝑰 𝒂𝒎 𝒌𝒏𝒐𝒘𝒏 𝒂𝒔 𝑺𝒊𝒈𝒎𝒂 - 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝑺𝒌𝒚 𝑪𝒂𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒐, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒘𝒏𝒆𝒓 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒍𝒐𝒈.”

─── ⋆⋅ ♱ ⋅⋆ ───

!Warning! Please tread this blog with caution, as it will include mentions of:

⭒Religious themes

⭒Death, the loss of loved ones, & murder

⭒Blood & gore

⭒Manipulation (such as blackmail)

⭒Consumption of drugs & alcohol (including smoking)

⭒Pregnancy

All of these topics will be tagged if they ever are featured in posts.

─── ⋆⋅ ♱ ⋅⋆ ───

Before continuing further, I wanted to establish that:

⭒This blog is for a portrayal of Sigma from the mun's personal BSD AU - meaning that certain events in the canon universe either occurred differently or never happened at all, especially in the case of Sigma's backstory that has been rewritten.

⭒Outright NSFW asks or RPs are not allowed whatsoever, as the mun is still a minor and feels uncomfortable with such. Suggestive jokes are okay, but it's important to take note that this interpretation of Sigma is already in a relationship.

⭒She will also be unavailable for ships of any kind, especially her with either Nikolai or Fyodor (or both).

⭒This blog will also have a ton of mentions of OC x Canon. If that isn't your thing, then feel free to not interact.

─── ⋆⋅ ♱ ⋅⋆ ───

Info about Sigma:

⭒She uses she/they pronouns.

⭒Yes, you can call her "Siggy". Or almost any nickname you can think of.

⭒She is 61 years old, and has a large family with her fiancé. As of the current timeline, she has 12 children (her oldest child being adoptive), with a 13th one on the way.

⭒She's *very* much in love with her fiancé, who she'll have a tendency of talking about at any opportunity she gets. Ask her about him, and she might end up talking your ears off.

⭒She is Polish.

⭒She identifies as Librafem (a gender identity similar to a demigirl, where the individual is mainly Agender but has some attachment to femininity/womanhood). She is also Demi-Aroace and Bisexual.

⭒She's very old. But she knows a scary amount of stuff when it comes to technology. However, she's unfamiliar with most slang terms.

⭒Backstory - [COMING SOON]

⭒Relationships - [COMING SOON]

⭒Headcanons - [COMING SOON]

─── ⋆⋅ ♱ ⋅⋆ ───

Info about the mun:

⭒You can call me Bernadette, Lavinia, Laetitia, Asmoday, or Lenore, or any diminutives of either one (such as Asmo and Lav/Lavi).

⭒I go by he/they/it pronouns, as well as neopronouns.

⭒My main blog is @gh0sts-of-utopia

─── ⋆⋅ ♱ ⋅⋆ ───

[kit-williams]

40k and D&D crossover Lion El'Jonson

Let's start off in order with Lion El'Jonson Will probably be just as disjointed and chaotic as the initial post

After splitting off from his brothers became a wandering mercenary/sell sword as he did not find exactly a place to call his own

Has a fey horse with 6 legs that can carry his weight

Magnus gave his brother rings to hide their true size but they are all still 7ft to 8ft tall (this is a plot point I'm going back and forth on as a bunch of 9ft tall men wouldn't be super out of place but I also know like Vulcan and Magnus are some of the taller ones) ((Feedback on this would be great))

Eventually the man ends up looking like his current 40k self (I really like the facial hair)

He is still secretive and only slightly less taciturn

After meeting his wife he is slightly less secretive and taciturn with his brothers and really only opens up to her.

He ends up working for a right bastard of a man but the pay is good and his reputation continues to grow and well no one else can seem to pay him off to switch sides.

This is where he eventually meets his wife. Gloria (Her name is up for debate as Gloria will either be her name or Konrad's wife's name.)

Gloria is a handmaiden of the lord, but her position was less than desirable as she was a bedwarmer for the lord. But she likes to call herself a hand maiden to have some dignity.

She was directed to help Ser Lion/Ser Jonson with anything that he needed which the noble figured would be "companionship"

Lion enjoyed Gloria's company as the way she dressed and spoke reminded him of Caliban maidens.

She eventually came clean with what she was after she felt like Ser Lion should not embarrass himself by calling a glorified whore "little dove"

"Lady Gloria I care little of what you are for others but to me you are my 'little dove' ." The words rumbled out of his chest smoothly. "Do not try to impress me with your acts of chivalry Ser Lion. I need not your pity!" Gloria snaps back, hot tears in her eyes. "Little Dove," He rumbled as he leaned down to be eye level with her, "I would not be talking this much if I felt only pity or just pure lust."

Has played enough political games to figure out who is given as a reward and who isn't; Of course he still felt insulted that this poor woman had basically been thrown at him for him to use.

However... Lion El'Jonson wasn't exactly complaining either

Eventually gets fed up with the Liege lord he is serving and decides to part ways but because of his tryst with Gloria he refuses to leave her behind

One evening when he is going to leave he jumps down, in full armor, onto the balcony of her room as he requested her and she was getting ready. This is also more impressive as he landed silently. He tells her to gather her things and that they were leaving. He wasn't going to leave his dove behind.

Had to kiss her after he grabbed her and lept from the balcony to keep her from screaming and alerting the whole castle to their escape.

Him and Gloria have 4 children Eldest son Luthor El'Jonson (this is the son we will follow) Eldest daughter Isolda El'Jonson Second daughter Gwendolyn El'Jonson Youngest son Asmodai El'Jonson

He will call his sons his squires and his daughters princesses

~NSFW~

He adores her wit and the way she gets a crude mouth when he pushes her buttons showing that she was not a noblewoman at all and just trained to be what she is.

Seduced his wife with less than knightly flirtations

My man will most certainly get pussydrunk

He is very much touch starved and affection starved (Like most of the Primarchs)

Will get emotional the first few times with her as she also made him feel loved

Gloria has scars on her arms and back from times others felt she was too mouthy and punished her. She just has a bad habit of having to have the last word or to add her own comment to a situation and it's bitten her in the ass, Lion enjoys it as she is respectful but still willful.

He loves his wife as besides being a guide for him in this new place she is something for him to pour all of his attention into as he's never had a woman and him just being a fragment of a full soul allows him to explore his desires.

[inferno-principe]

𝐌𝐔𝐋𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐄

RULES:Answer the questions with the Muses that would best fit the answers. Bonus if you give details why.

1) Rank your softest Muse and your toughest Muse. (Personality-wise) : My softest is hands down Asulah. I don't even know how she qualifies to be a demon. She's had a rough upbringing but is consistently optimistic and supportive of her big brother and genuinely loves her family, despite them not treating her the best. The toughest is probably Yevgeny? He doesn't really let things get to him and emotional attachment is something he really doesn't worry about. He's determined to meet his goals, no matter who he has to screw over or what he has to do.

2) Which Muse would blow through $1000 quickly? : Any of my royals, but especially Kasadya. She's got the double whammy of being a princess and a Demon of Avarice. So 1k is like pocket change to her. She's going out with her friends and treating them to drinks. Either that, or she's gonna spend it splurging on her girlfriend Ace.

3) Do any of them have nicknames? Is there a meaning behind them? : Pretty much all of them have nicknames. The most significant are probably Si and Ozzie's. Sidonai prefers to have people call him "Si" as a nickname, rather than "Nai." It was a nickname his mother gave him and the only people who are allowed to use it are family members and a select few close friends. Ozzie's nickname is significant because well...Ozzie is his nickname. He actually doesn't know his full name, and his father has no intentions of revealing it, mostly for his safety. His full name is Asmodai, named after his birth father's true name.

4) Are any of them up-to-speed on the latest trends? Anyone more old school? : My younger characters perhaps? Or ones who have died more recently. Probably Terrance? Since he lives on Gaia and amongst humans. But most of my demons are pretty ancient, old school beings, so they're more stuck in their ways.

5) Who has the best relationship with their siblings? : Si and Ace, but only with them. Si has a rough relationship with the others. Other than them, it's probably the Mezoran triplets, Kasadya, Uphir, and Caym, or the Brakhavan princes, Mihr and Sytry.

6) Karaoke night! Who is likely to grab the mic first and bust out a tune? : Ngl this sounds like something a very drunk Tamiel would do. Very drunk Tamiel and a very drunk Si.

7) Who is least likely to enter a beauty pageant/model? : Terrance. Despite actually being quite handsome, he would find it really superficial and very obnoxious.

8) If your Muses visited a haunted house where actors scare you, who would panic and who would be unfazed? : Si talks a big game about being tough, but he would probably freak out. So would poor Kaelon. The one who is the most unfazed is Sabrael. She's the Angel Slayer. Some guy jumping out at her with a fake chainsaw isn't gonna scare her.

9) Are any of your Muses particular about taking certain modes of transportation? : Not really, no. Sathanus is keen on using her raven-drawn carriages, as it allows her to travel within Brakhava's shadows more easily, but other than that, no one really travels much.

10) Share a little-known fact about any Muse : Sidonai has a pair of retainers. One is the daughter of a nobleman, named Carmine, who Si chose because she bears a striking resemblance to his ex. The second is Azure Leclair, a former courtesan that Si used to frequent.

Tagged by : @archerwhiterp Tagging: anyone who wants to do this

[devilishbirds]

tell me about those freaks

ok bro!!!!!!

so first and foremost there is apollyon. a centuries old (Really could be interpreted as early 40s for her race.) demon usurper who hates her life, and took their position with an iron grip, but has too much pride in themself to just give it back. Years of torturous conditions by heavens regime (they assumed her to be a threat [shes genderfluid btw. unrelated] because of not-very-well studied conditions of mental health) shaped her into the incredibly erratic and depressed figure she is today.

Second, I want to talk about Bezeliel. Current angel, working girl in a little cafe upstarted by those who want to do something with their immortal lives, and currently Apollyon's biggest fan (lesbiab). Mid thirties in the same way A would be, and isn't in the loop about the whole banishment schtick. Apollyon never really told her (forgot). Like shes utterly smitten with her. I don't get it.

There's the rest of the Seven Deadly sin crew, or Hell's crown sovereigns Lucifer Chevalier-Morningstar and Ba'alzebub are married, and have a kid who lucifer kind of just stole. his name is damien and hes the heir to the throne of pride if lucifer kicks it.

Mammon is just a shitty wine aunt. Hell of a lot of money to throw around, almost completely apathetic, disinterested in the wellbeing of others if it doesn't have a cash flow.

Leviathan is just a fucking dragon. end quote Asmoday and Satanas are the best of friends and are never seen apart.

Then there's belphegor who i really havent worked out much beyond twitch vtuber

characters are hard dawg