#autistic adult problems

[bibliocharlie]

the most helpful thing i have ever seen from neurodivergent internet spaces is “THERE ARE OTHER TIMES OF DAY TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH”. this has genuinely saved me from executive dysfunction spirals so many times.

[crazycatsiren]

No no you don't understand! I want to watch this show/movie, read this book, listen to this podcast, etc.! But I must be in the right mindset and the exact head space to begin, or I just can't!

[autismwithoutpremium]

Just a thought

[autistic-misery]

[tunaricebowl]

i don’t know which autistic/adhd/any kind of neurodivergent person needs to hear this but: make a “just in case” bag

this is a pic of mine. it contains:

loop earplugs on the zipper

prescription glasses with a clip on sunglasses attachment

my public transport discount card

a pen

a glasses cloth + wet glasses wipes (which can also be used to clean my hands if needed!

wireless earbuds in case my headphones give out

tips for my apple pencil + silicon covers if i need a different texture/the sound is too loud

a sanitary pad (not for me, as i had a hysterectomy, but i like carrying one around for my menstruating friends)

a pouch with hair ties for when my hair bothers me

autism lanyard (not pictured, as i put it in after i took it)

will i use these every day? not necessarily. but it’s good to have these all in one place in a little pouch so it’s easy to throw into my bag as i use different ones for different occasions. that way i don’t have to think about all these things individually.

it might seem like common sense for some people, but i didn’t think of this until recently. so i wanted to share this in case it could be handy for other people. some more ideas for what to put in your bag under the break. you can make this as big or as small as you like so some ideas may seem a bit big

powerbank + cables (preferably a powerbank that has a LOT of charge)

snacks (do keep an eye on the expiration date)

painkillers/emergency meds (same thing about the expiration date)

sewing kit

deodorant/perfume

mini fan

hand warmers

scissors/nail clippers (for when tags/threads/your nails are bothering you)

tweezers

lucky charm (i have my lucky cat keychain. it just calms me to have)

plushie/stress ball/fidget toy

mints/a mini toothbrush and toothpaste

extra pair of underwear (for if you suddenly need to stay somewhere overnight or if an accident happens)

comb

band-aids + disinfectant

hand cream/soothing cream

soap/soap leaves

similarly, some mini shampoo or mini body wash (again for if you suddenly need to stay the night. there’s probably already some wherever you’re staying but again. this is a just in case bag)

q-tips

chapstick

makeup remover wipes

razors

hand sanitizer/general sanitizer

wet wipes/tissues

foldable bag

ruler/tape measure

this is a lot but keep in mind, these are just ideas. you don’t have to use everything, just pick out which things you think would be handy for you and make your bag accordingly. do feel free to add onto the list if you have any other ideas.

[canenotabeltofunction]

Me: “I can’t be autistic, I don’t have sensory issues.”

Also Me-

- The person who told me to try freezing grapes is my enemy.

- *Physically gagging from trying to eat a freeze dried strawberry*

- “I can’t sleep, my shirt is on.”

- This yogurt had pieces of fruit in it so I will let it spoil in the back of my fridge and die of starvation before I eat it.

- If anyone touches me right now I will become a safety hazard

- *Throwing myself off of furniture*

- Something is crinkling SOMEWHERE in the next room and if I don’t find it and destroy it I will never sleep again.

- This person’s headlights were too bright for 0.5 seconds and now I will have a migraine for the next 4 hours.

- My hands are wet MY HANDS ARE WET MAKE IT STOP

- What do you mean these clothes are dry? They’re clearly still damp, how do you not feel it? They’re still damp!

- These two rocks rubbed against each other and made a noise and I think I may have broken a tooth from clenching my jaw so hard

- If I am forced to wear jeans for more than 0.3 seconds upon entering my home I’m going to start crying

- Frosted Glass = Evil

- Yes I am going to “waste money” buying pre-peeled garlic because peeling garlic makes my hands sticky and I hate it.

- Stopping to wash my hands every 5 minutes while cooking because I can’t stand having things on my hands.

Feel free to add your own

[beenovel]

Pro tip for people looking for meds or diagnosis. DO NOT MASK in front of a psychiatrist. I went in for an evaluation with a new psychiatrist this week with the goal of getting meds and I was just fully myself during the interview like bouncing my knees, only looking at him occasionally, breaking off mid-sentence to ask about the room decor (“were you in the Air Force? That’s a really cool chess set. Is that a Star Wars tie????”). And he did not even hesitate when I told him I was there to get adderall or another med he was just like “yup makes sense, let’s talk about your options”.

In the past I’ve always really struggled (and still do!) with masking around other people especially if they’re new, and this has sometimes made it difficult to get meds because I mask so well that sometimes professionals haven’t believed me when I said I was struggling because I looked fine.

Edit: I’ve seen a lot of people saying “it’s so hard to unmask though!” and yeah, it is. For me it was physically painful and nearly impossible. So I faked it. I bounced my leg, I wouldn’t look the provider in the face, I interrupted myself, I rubbed my palms on my legs and none of it was natural. I faked it all. And I did that over and over and over until it was real. Until I was comfortable enough with being odd to actually unmask

[galacticscrotum]

Neurotypicals all need to be reminded that if you made fun of someone in school for being “weird,” you were making fun of autistic people and that’s ableist and wrong. If you don’t educate yourself and change, you’re a bad person.

Things I saw kids get made fun of for:

Walking on their toes

Communicating directly

Not making eye contact

Making too much eye contact

Having special interests

Not having the right interests

Having few friends

Trying to make friends

Being “too” happy

Feeling overwhelmed

Being shy

Not talking much

Talking too much

Having fun being silly

Being serious

Doing well in class (nerd)

Doing poorly in class (stupid)

Any noticeable stims

The way we eat

A lot of other shit

Yeah, those kids were neurodivergent and you were an asshole to them. Do you see all the contradictions in that list? You never actually had a problem with anything we did or didn’t do. You had a problem with our existence. The way we talked, walked, breathed, you bullied us for it.

What’s even more disgusting and insane:

Lots of these kids chose to spend their elective periods with the special ed kids class. Lots of them grew up to be teachers, SpEd teachers, psychologists, etc. not because they want to help autistic people, but because they want to feel superior.

A big fuck you to all of the bullies and jerks that treated us like shit simply for being different from you.

I hope you’ve changed, but I know you probably haven’t. You’re doing the same shit, all that’s changed is you’re getting paid for it now. Go to hell. (A very particular section of hell where you’re marginalized for your neurotype and forced into ABA therapy and treated exactly how you treated us).

[ejbuckley]

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, being autistic is like playing a board game without knowing any of the rules.

[themaskedlady]

[adhdxxsdiary]

[c-0-yote-teeth]

When you tell them you have ADHD and autism and they say that's fine but then they find out it's not cutesy collecting hello Kitty and bouncy stimming autism and oopsie I can't pay attention ADHD,

its I can't go in the grocery store I can't vacuum I can't do dishes because of the sensory overload

it's we can go eat at a restaurant but as soon as I start getting overwhelmed I'm going to shut down completely and dissociate but tell you I'm fine

It's please snuggle me but I have to keep my headphones on because hearing is too much right now

It's thank you this new shirtjacketbraceletnecklace you bought me is amazing and I love it but I can't wear it because it feels weird

It's I love you but sometimes your voice is too much noise and I can't look into your eyes

It's I need you near me but please don't touch me or talk or breathe too loud or cough because my brain feels like it's about to explode

It's I'm sorry I forgot you asked me to do the dishes but I know when your entire family's birthdays are and will never forget them

It's I meant to cook dinner four hours ago but I got lost in my brain and I just found my way back out and realized it's already 10pm

[autismwithoutpremium]

Me with eggs

[autistic-misery]

Fake It 'til You Break It 😭

[crazycatsiren]

It's either "I must do this thing RIGHT NOW or I'm going to lose it" or "the stars and planets aren't in perfect positions so it'll happen when that happens" and nothing in between.

[imaginarylungfish]

i constantly forget that stimming will help me. like sometimes i feel so overwhelmed and start catastrophizing about my job or a partner or my family or friends. BUT THEN I STIM. and life's okay