#b/c it was nothing but rambling nonsense

[miradelletarot]

A little help?

Friends, moots...passers by?

might be a strange ask, but can you just bombard my TL with Everything Gale Dekarios? I need to purge some sad brain shit outta my head, and the only cure is Gale. Probably.

...or a lobotomy. That will make me stop thinking about my failed marriage right? Hmm. Let's try Gale first.

[cursed-iris]

please infodump about jatcch i beg i beg i beg 🙏🙏

👀 omg, omg ok SO i'm sorry in advance for my ravings because they are not going to make any sense,,

most people know about the jatcch movie ending, which is my favorite interpretation, but there's also the 2007 novel that the movie is based on and a lot of fans don't know about the 2005 dionysos album "monsters in love."

spoiler warning for the book below the cut because i be rambling-

basically, in the book jack doesn't die after kissing miss acacia. in fact, it's confirmed that there was actually nothing necessarily wrong with his heart and the three rules were just nonsense madeleine came up with to keep him dependent on her,,, which is... Not Great obviously. if i recall correctly, it's been a while since i've read it, he gets into this argument with miss acacia over joe and jack, like a total dumbass (with all due respect), starts ripping his heart out of his chest. this sends him into a coma for about three years. when he wakes up, he learns a few things:

a) méliès wrote a book about him and his heart (not important to this post per say, but that is where he learns he never needed a cuckoo clock heart in the first place, so yikes amiright?)

b) he looks different

c) everyone thinks he's dead and miss acacia is married to joe now

so, like, he's shit out if luck, but he tries to reacquaint himself with miss acacia anyway, who goes on about how she's unhappily married and how she's actually in love with this dude who died three years ago. jack's like, "omg girlie, that's me" and he gives her his old cuckoo clock heart.

instead of being happy that he's alive, miss acacia is PISSED. she's like, "dude, i thought you were dead, i'm in a loveless marriage, and i put flowers on your grave every day for the past few days. fuck you actually." she leaves and never speaks to him again, so jack returns to edinburgh as a phantom of his former self. really great stuff.

anyway, if monsters in love is canon to the jatcch storyline, it takes place directly after the end of the novel and technically makes the novel a prequel considering the album came first. anyway, i don't know exactly how much time has passed between the end of the book and the first song in the tracklist "giant jack" (banger song btw), but my guy's been through some things. he's godzilla-sized now and he's terrorizing scotland because,,,

reasons.

also, the song tes lacets sont des fées has a music video featuring jack, acacia, and what i assume is the "broken bird" (another song from the tracklist). it's weird as hell, but it does allude to the fact that maybe miss acacia returned to edinburgh at one point to perform and encountered jack, who is not doing it great let's be real. and she does not care about him tbh, which,, given whatever is going on in the music video, is valid.

we're not gonna ask questions, it's dionysos we're talking about. like i could rant all about my headcanons on what all the other songs mean and the fact that joe is probably mister chat, but this post is already long enough 😭

[sir-yeehaw-paws]

Funny that I say something like ‘to overshare or not overshare’ when I’m going to anyway. Pfft.

So, hell, why not. Rambling MGS4 thoughts below. Though I won’t be using my standard MGS tags, since I want to keep it out of the main tags. This is all mainly nonsense anyway, but I want to eventually put them out there b/c I want to replay this again and Idk. You guys know how allergic I am to shutting up.

TW: Medical, Death, Abuse, SA Mention (Non-Descriptive)

I finished MGS4 in a haze, crying hysterically and bothered to a point I couldn’t even lay my finger on. For a while I let it sit and just didn’t know what, exactly, had bothered me so much.

As the game went on, I noticed vaguely somewhere around maybe the half way mark this was bugging me, but I chalked it up to the sad nature of the game itself, and left it at that. I have no issue with the themes within the game, and you all know how much I embrace bothersome or disturbing content. And if you don’t, well. Now you do. I’m not shy about liking morally questionable content, nor disturbing content.

In any case-that wasn’t the issue.

No, the issue was Snake’s aging. Or, more specifically, the way the game presented it. Of all things.

But-eh, hear me out.

When I was a teenager, my life was hectic. I worked to help my mum pay the bills, but had to quit after an SA that I was blamed for (I was sixteen, and the victim, but I’d apparently asked for it. Whatever, fuck cops anyway). My grandfather was slowly dying from terminal illness, and time not spent at school or helping my mum was taking care of him. He had a variety of illnesses, but one of them, COPD, had him suffering violent coughing fits that he’d black out from. When he used to sit up, he’d cough himself unconscious, and sometimes end up on the floor. I’d call ambulances those days; I wasn’t able to lift him. I knew how to distribute his meds, his masks. All that stuff. I’d be woken up from a dead sleep to him calling my name, or coughing so loud I knew he needed the meds now. Fill the mask, do the tubes, fix the oxygen tank levels. I was very sleep deprived for most of my High School years.

(Only to go to class the next day and have my friends nag me about my slipping grades, askdnsajk) anyway.

I was pretty close to my grandpa. My dads, well anyway. Not worth discussing rn. My grandmother, his wife, died when I was 14.  I was raised by my mum and my grandparents. My grandfather wasn’t even that old during all this-early 60′s, and everyday I just watched him slowly fading away, unable to do ANYTHING to stop the inevitable as he had another coughing fit, another shake, etc.

In any case, he passed when I was 19, and time has it’s natural way of having things get pushed aside, I went through even more upheaval in my early 20′s that lead to a serious mental breakdown around 25-26 that had me admitted to a psyche ward. Eventually I was diagnosed with Persistent Depressive Disorder, Psychosis and PTSD,

Things changed, I got my mental health under control, and life carries on.

And then I played MGS4 this year.

It’s funny, things I’d forgotten all about just crashing to the surface, seeing reflections through a screen like that. How my brain was ticking through watching Snake smoke through his violent coughing fits (Something my grandfather did up until one of his hospitalizations FINALLY got him to quit). The general helplessness Hal has, because there’s NOTHING you can do. Hell these days *I’m* chronically ill but not..terminally ill. I think they did much of Snake’s ageing and decline well, I guess for my brain? Too well.

S’funny, and maybe even kinda dumb. Stuff you don’t even think bothers you anymore, just sort of. Comes too a head.

It’s not like this post has a point. I am capable of controlling my own media intake. And there’s a large part of me that even wants to replay it! I just think it’s..strange how brains work. And how the most random things can be so big when they reflect your life in the most..disconnected and bizarre way.

Or something. Maybe I just wanted this out in the open cos that’s how I function (though some of my friends had heard this before from me).

Brains are weird. Life’s weird. But hey.

[queenofthursday6599-blog]

You know, someday someone will write a Bioshock story that has these guys in it:

Because the idea of survivor camps hidden away in different parts of Rapture, is just too logical not to show up in a fanfic somewhere.

There has to be at least a small subset of people in Rapture who never got into splicing. It can’t literally just be Sinclair, Grace, Sophia Lamb, Tenenbaum, and Stanly who never touched the stuff and lived to 1968.

Like the couple that tried to escape in that crashed bathysphere that we find early on into Bioshock 2. They don’t sound like splicers, they sound completely coherent (something splicers don’t tend to sound).

I just love the survivor idea so much. That and how there would have been be a pneumo trading system with them. Which I think could have replaced the vending machine system, at least in some parts of Rapture.

Such as Dionysus Park, where it’s been flooded since before the war. So all of the vending machines (or at least their content) should have logically been ruined.

Different traders would focus on different things, as you can tell the picture above is of the ammo trader’s inventory.

It’s just that when I really got into looking up removed content from the games this is one of the things I was sad never made it into the final game. So I’ve always wanted to see someone write a fic exploring the idea.

So I’ve got fic idea below, involving Eleanor’s childhood friend Amir being a survivor if you want to read any of it:

Personally I’ve always wanted to see a fic with Eleanor’s childhood friend Amir turning out to be a survivor. Just because Eleanor deserves nice things, and should be able to escape Rapture with her childhood friend on a stolen submarine like she’d wanted too as a child.

Also it’d just be a great reunion anyways, because you know both Eleanor and Amir would think the other is either dead, or spliced to the point it’d be less horrible to think they’re dead.

The survivor camps are supposed to be isolated from the rest of Rapture. No splicers or splicing among the survivors means no reason for little sisters to come around because there would be nothing to gather. The survivors wouldn’t care about Lamb and what she has to say. She’s just another adam obsessed leader of the most recent cult of personality. Just like Atlas, and Fontaine, and Ryan. Everything she says just sounds like weird drug cult nonsense to them.

Amir might not even know Eleanor survived the war at all if he doesn’t know her last name. Because my guess is that the last he heard of her was that she was seen around town as a Little Sister, and then the civil war broke out and she was gone. They were both pretty young kids back then, so Amir could very well not even know or remember Eleanor’s last name was Lamb. [After all, we the audience never learn Amir’s last name from Eleanor. He’s just Amir.] So even if he does hear Sophia’s sermons about the “People’s Daughter” and the random Splicer’s ramblings, and that girl being referred to as Eleanor. The idea that it could be the Eleanor he knew from childhood doesn’t even come to mind.

Eleanor who punched him in the face without an ounce of hesitation the first day they met. Who was sneaking out of her house so frequently her controlling mother installed a security system to keep her inside. Who, when they were kids, once looked him in the eye and asked, completely seriously, if he was a dog eating dog in a human suit. He’s supposed to think that girl is this weird cult’s all forgiving, all knowing, messiah figure?

Eleanor was feral, and Amir knew that. It’s the whole reason they were friends.

So there’s only 4 options in Amir’s mind: A) Eleanor died as a little sister during the New Years Eve Riot, because that’s when she disappeared, and a lot of people died during the riot. B) Eleanor survived the New Years Eve Riot, but later died as a little sister. Death was very common among little sisters, it’s why little girls were worth so much in Rapture. C) Eleanor survived the riot, and was one of the lucky little sisters to get swept up by Jack Ryan and Dr. Tenenbaum and is now living a normal life on the surface, with Rapture being just a distant memory. [God does Amir hope this is what happened.] Or lastly D) Eleanor survived as a little sister all the way through to being turned into a big sister. And she’s now one of those shrieking, murderous giants running around Rapture. [The option Amir dreads the most.]

Eleanor on the other hand definitely hasn’t heard hide nor hair of Amir since she got swept up in the Gatherer program. Sophia didn’t want Eleanor to have friends anyways, and Eleanor was actively breaking out of the house in order to go see Amir and the rest of her friends.

So when Sophia found Eleanor again she 100% kept her under lock and key, and certainly wouldn’t have told Eleanor anything about her old friends. Friendship meant a more significant emotional attachment. Friendship meant favoritism among the masses. A flaw in the utopian mindset that Sophia was obsessed with molding her child to have.

So Eleanor assumes that Amir was killed as a child during the civil war, or that he’s possibly a splicer, but she finds the second idea highly unlikely. The idea that Amir could have survived as a non-splicer survivor doesn’t really cross her mind, as the non-splicer survivors rarely cross her mind.

Eleanor is in a prison and can only see and hear into the world beyond where the little sisters are. The non-splicer survivor camps had long since blocked up the little sister vents that lead to their camps. Due to the fact that a big daddy would never be too far behind one. Along with the possibility of a splicer following the adam rich smell of a little sister into their camp area.

Most non-splicer survivors who are scavengers (who are the ones how leave their camp/safe area to find supplies) tend to be older than Eleanor (and Amir). After all, parents who managed to keep their kids alive, sure as hell wouldn’t be trying to send them off into the dangerous splicer ridden battle field that is the city beyond their safe area.

So even when she gains the eyes and ears of the little sisters, Eleanor doesn’t ever see proof of Amir still being alive. Or even being a still living splicer from the memories of dead splicers.

[realllllfangirllllll]

{SF9 Reaction} They get jealous of you fangirling at another group.

Kingdom Edition

{Requested by anon}

SF9 Masterlist

Main Masterlist

(Disclaimer: I kinda wrote mini scenarios for each of them b/c I love this concept so much ashfdgkkjs)

Youngbin

The two of you were pretty transparent with each other in the relationship so he knew you stanned many other groups besides his own. Nothing really bothered him, but that was until he joined Kingdom. While the two of you sat on your couch, cuddled against each other to rewatch the pilot episode, you kept commenting on Bang Chan’s performance and how he had such great leadership skills. Youngbin felt himself get jealous especially when the topic of leadership was brought up. He tried his best to conceal his expression so he raised his other hand that wasn’t wrapped around your waist to the side of his face. You noticed his behavior and immediately thought of a mischievous plan. After all, it wasn’t everyday that you saw your calm and composed boyfriend on the verge of breaking down from jealousy. You purposely escalated your fangirling on Bang Chan until Bin couldn’t contain his composure anymore and he unwinded his arm around your waist, got up, and stood in front of your view. You suppressed your laughter as you moved your head around in an attempt to watch the tv but he wasn’t impressed. His entire body moved along with wherever you moved and you ended up bursting out into giggles. You grabbed his waist to still him but he didn’t budge. “Kitten, I’m not going to stop until you praise me like you did with Bang Chan,” Youngbin said in a bitter tone. You stopped giggling and stood on the couch to match his height. Out of the blue, you showered his sour face with kisses and his expression immediately shifted into his signature eye smile. You pulled back and said sweetly, “How about I give you kisses instead?”

Inseong

Inseong just got back from his shooting for Kingdom and you welcomed him with your arms and wide opened for a hug. He always loved when you gave him a long, warm hug after a day of tiring work but today, he was a lot clingier than usual. He never pulled apart from the hug and walked forward, which caused you to topple over the soft couch. You giggled as he stuffed his face into the side of your neck and took a whiff of your scent. You wiggled around as he tickled you with his breath. In between your giggles you asked why he was being like a mopey puppy and he let out a long groan. He pulled apart and stared up into your eyes with his dopey ones and whined, “When we got ready to leave the shooting site for Kingdom, Chanwoo came up to me and told me how nice you were. How do you guys even know each other??” You chuckled at his pouty and jealous expression and placed your hand on top of his head. You played with his fluffy hair and told him in an amused tone, “Chani had his number and I love Chanwoo’s voice.” You saw Inseong pout again and you continued teasing him, “I couldn’t just give up on such a great opportunity. I am a dedicated ikonic.” The last sentence triggered him and he immediately hoisted his body up and peered down at you with jealousy, “I thought you love my voice.” You giggled and decided to stop teasing him before he exploded with even more jealousy and wrapped your arms around his neck. You pulled him down and connected your lips to his, “I love your voice the most.” He immediately replaced the pout on his lips with a wide smile.

Jaeyoon

You waited for Jaeyoon to finish taking a shower after he came back from his shoot for Kingdom so you sprawled yourself across your bed and decided to stream the youtube clips of previous Kingdom performances on your iPad. The thumbnail of The Boyz’s performance caught your eye and you clicked into the clip. You were so excited to see another version of The Stealer and also couldn’t wait to see your bias, Sangyeon, dancing to it. You were so absorbed into their beautiful choreo, you didn’t realize that Jaeyoon came out of the bathroom and was standing by the bed frame for a good ten minutes. He cleared his throat but you didn’t hear him through the loud audio. Jealously crept into his veins and he tried his best to cover it with sarcasm, “Should I dance to The Stealer so my baby will pay attention to me?” You finally heard him and chuckled at his behavior. You taunted him in response, “But it won’t be the same because you’re not Sangyeon.” Jaeyoon gasped, feigning hurt and took the device from your hands. He carelessly placed it on the bedside table before he flung himself onto the soft mattress. He hovered over you and said with amusement, “Well then I guess I have to show you why Jaeyoon is even better.”

Dawon

Dawon stared at you for the longest time in disbelief and chuckled out of nervousness as you sat beside him on the couch of his company’s dance studio. You made dramatic fangirl comments at Ateez’s Kingdom performance especially when Seonghwa appeared on the screen. You punched Dawon’s arm and told him to watch with you, excessively showering Seonghwa with praises. You weren’t oblivious to your boyfriend’s jealousy but you loved it whenever the opportunity came up. He has a tendency of sarcastically laughing with a hint of shy nervousness when he gets jealous and that was exactly how he was acting at the moment. Originally, you only wanted to see Ateez’s performance because you were a big fan of them and because you were waiting for Dawon to finish practicing. But when he came down and sat beside you, you unintentionally praised Seonghwa’s beauty on stage which sparked Dawon’s jealously and you couldn’t help but to continuously tease him and rile him up. As a result, you amped up your inner fangirl until Dawon couldn’t handle it anymore. “Okay that’s it,” He chuckled bitterly and grabbed your phone. You turned to him and he stared into your eyes with a pout and large puppy eyes. “Focus on me baby.” You swallowed down a laughter and extended your arm out for the phone and wailed, “But my Seonghwa!” At this rate, Dawon knew you were messing with him so he grabbed your arms and placed it around his neck before he proceeded to lift you up off the couch and onto him. He sat back down on the couch and had you on top of his laps. Quickly and cunningly, he shoved your phone underneath his butt and sarcastically remarked with amusement, “Come get your phone if you want to see your Seonghwa that badly.”

Rowoon

Rowoon had just come back from his shooting for Kingdom and you followed him around the house like a lost puppy. “Did you see Younghoon? Did you get to talk to him? How was it seeing him perform live??” You fired questions at him like an automatic rifle, clearly showing your enthusiasm as a Deobi, especially a Younghoon stan. Rowoon knew you really liked The Boyz and he was usually fine with your enthusiastic support for the group. He would even join you and fanboy himself when you watch their stages on Youtube. But Rowoon was exhausted after the shooting and was anticipating to have his s/o welcome him home with some love, something he missed so much after being apart from you for drama and Kingdom shootings. Instead, you were asking him about another man and that immediately sparked his jealousy. At first, he just let you ramble on as he took off his shoes and went to the bathroom to freshen up. He loves you and he usually will never pick a fight or act petty no matter how jealous he was. You knew that. You also knew that he was jealous the moment you opened your mouth. At first, you only wanted to get some intel from your boyfriend who had seen one of your biases in person but after seeing the jealousy that flashed in his eyes, you made it your mission to make Rowoon crack for once. You were enjoying yourself so much that you continued talking about Younghoon even as he was in the shower. You leaned against the marble sink and tried saying random nonsense to rile him up but he only chuckled at your fangirl behavior and continued to shower. Suddenly, a mischievous thought crossed your mind and you waited until Rowoon turned off the shower faucet and stepped out to initiate the plan. You feigned a curious, innocent stare at him and placed your hand beneath your chin as if you were deeply contemplating. “Babe, I’m curious about something...” He absentmindedly replied as he plugged in the hair dryer to the wall outlet, “Oh yeah? What is it?” You smirked and eyed him up and down, “Do you think Younghoon is as tall and built as you?” Rowoon froze midway through drying his hair. He turned towards you and turned the device off with a jealous look on his face, one that you have never seen before. You bit down on your lips to hold back a laughter. Gotcha. Before he could muster up a response you continued, “What about his laugh? Does he laugh like you do?” You stared at your boyfriend innocently and his face was flushed red with jealousy. He placed the hair dryer aside and suddenly hoisted you up on top of his broad shoulders, “Definitely not.” He said firmly and then chuckled before softly throwing you onto the cloud-like mattress. His face hovered closely above yours, “He will never be able to easily carry you like I just did nor could he ever make you smile the way I do.” You burst out into giggles as he proceeded to tickle you until you shower him with compliments the way you did with Younghoon.

Zuho

Zuho casually talked to you about his experience in Kingdom as he drove through the dimly lit streets. The two of you decided to go for a quick date late at night, mostly to avoid getting caught by the media, and he was beyond excited to tell you about meeting his seniors. You listened intently and responded with excitement as well since the both of you were huge fans of Btob. Zuho stopped talking once the car had arrived to the isolated park. The two of you laid on top of the car’s hood and gazed at the stars in the night sky and continued the conversation. Somewhere in the middle of your chat, you turned to him and pouted. You told him you wish you were there as well because you wanted to see and hear Minhyuk live. You emphasized with a big pout on your lips, “I want to see Minhyuk rap with his husky voice but also hear him sing with his honey smooth vocals.” Zuho froze for a second, your words not fully processing through his mind. He turned towards you and mumbled with slight jealousy, “I didn’t know you like Minhyuk that much.” He chuckled in disbelief and questioned you, “Husky voice? Honey smooth vocals?” He then became really flustered, caught by surprise at you fangirling more than usual. He kept blinking in disbelief, unable to accept the fact that you liked Minhyuk so much. You found amusement in his cute behavior and teased him even more. You placed your hands by your heart and said dramatically, “I could die happily once I hear Minhyuk live.” Zuho started to get really flustered, cheeks red with jealousy. You chuckled at your adorable boyfriend and squished his cheeks, “I’m messing with you babe! I’m a diehard Melody but my boyfriend is always the #1 person I’d die for.” You gave him a ridiculously sweet look and he caved in. He pulled you on top of him for a hug before the both of you accidentally slid off the side of the hood and onto the ground, with Zuho underneath you as a cushion. He grunted at the impact as you giggled uncontrollably.

Taeyang

When you were mindlessly humming to No Air in the kitchen after watching The Boyz’s latest Kingdom performance, Taeyang’s ears perked up and jealousy immediately ignited in his body. Yes, he gets jealous that easily. You would usually tell him how you enjoy watching The Boyz perform because it’s so satisfying and he would agree because it’s true. But you would also start to notice his pettiness everytime you mention them. He’d nod at your comments and agree but in a way that seems almost sarcastic. “Yeah they are great dancers,” he’d tell you. But then he’d look up at you and say, almost for confirmation, “But I’m a great dancer too.” You’d chuckled to yourself and agree or else you know he’ll be sulking for the rest of the day. But this time, you wanted to see how Taeyang gets when he’s really jealous. At first, No Air really was stuck on your head so you were humming to it. However, something mischievous struck you as you were making chocolate covered strawberries in the kitchen. You wanted to see how far you could take the joke so you purposely pressed his buttons. From the moment he heard you humming, he immediately dashed by your side and wrapped his arms around you as you boiled the chocolate. He laid his head on your shoulder and tried his best to subtly ask you, “Were you watching The Boyz’s performance again?” You replied with a yes and emphasized, “Juyeon is such a great dancer and his expressions are so intriguing,” and that’s when Taeyang lost it. He clung onto you as you were trying to cool down the chocolate and even while you were moving to grab the strawberries from the fridge, he’d stick to you like glue and kept asking you why you like Juyeon so much. “Babyyy,” he whined, “Did you forget about me??” He kept kissing your cheeks with his arms wrapped around you as you struggled to wash the strawberries. At the end, you gave up and twisted around to face him. His arms never let go of your waist as he continued saying jealous nonsense. You took your hand and squished his cheeks, “You are the best, most handsome and talented dancer, artist, and boyfriend okay?” He smirked, satisfied, and you giggled at his ridiculous face squished between your hand. He was just about to open his mouth to spew more nonsense and you shoved a strawberry in his mouth, “okay now shush babe. I love you but I want to eat my chocolate covered strawberries, preferably with the chocolate, so stop clinging onto me.”

Hwiyoung

Hwiyoung’s a fun-loving boyfriend and he wouldn’t just randomly get jealous even if you were meeting up with an ex. He respects your boundaries and trusts your decisions. You love him for that but it also wanted made you curious as to how your boyfriend would react when jealous. SO you decided to surprise him after his Kingdom shoot and went to pick him up with their manager. You hid in the van and surprised the boys when they came toward the vehicle. The eight boys already knew your devious plan and paid no mind to you acting unusually dramatic as you kept asking him if he talked to Hyunjin during the shoot and if you could meet him as well. He looked at you weirdly with a bit of skepticism, “You weren’t that interested in meeting him when I was on Idol Radio with him..why are you so eager now?” You flinched at his retaliation and quickly hopped into the van. You heard Rowoon and Juho snickered in the back and you glared at them for the mockery. As the engine started and the vehicle started down the road back to the dorms, you initiated your second attempt to get under your boyfriend’s skin. You pulled out your phone and watched the Stray Kids’s introduction stage on youtube without earphones. Subtly, you turned to Hwiyoung and asked with the most innocent and adoring eyes, “Babe I didn’t know Hyunjin looked so great with long hair.” At that comment, Hwiyoung’s expression slightly shifted. Almost immediately he responded with a more serious tone, “Even better than I did?” You held back your laughter and felt success creeping up. In the back of the van, you saw Rowoon and Zuho giving you a slightly surprised expression. You winked at them and got excited as your boyfriend gradually became jealous. When you all got back to the dorm, Hwi stuck to your side. You tried so hard not to laugh as he kept asking you with slight skepticism in his tone, “When did you like Hyunjin so much?” “Should I grow out my long hair again?” He acted like a kid got abandoned by his mother and needed to grab your attention. To your surprise, he acted in such a different way than you would’ve thought. But you found it so adorable so you teased him even more by turning the tv on to watch a Hyunjin fancam. Hwi caught you by surprise again as he plopped down on the couch beside you and wiggled adorably to get your attention. You raised the remote to your lips and masked your giggles, keeping note to tease him more often.

Chani

Another one that doesn’t get jealous often. Or ever actually. That’s just not the way he shows affection. But that was until things got a little too personal. Beside the sepgu boys, Chani has never really seen you interact with any of his other friends so he never understood actual jealousy. However, after the one time Chanwoo called Chani to thank him for his advice on Kingdom, he started to notice how much you liked Chanwoo and Ikon. Because of your boyfriend’s appearance on Kingdom, you started to take an interest on Ikon and became a fan of their music. It was true that you liked Chanwoo’s voice but it was never really to the extent of fangirling over him. That thought never crossed your mind until Chani kept asking you how much you liked Ikon, or most importantly, Chanwoo. From his point of view, he’d always notice how your face brightens while watching Ikon performances on the tv. He’d stare at you with a hesitant smile and when you asked him what he was staring at you for, he’d simply reply with a shrug, “You always seem so happy to see Chanwoo’s part in the song.” At first, you hadn’t put much thought into his comment until he continuously brought it up every time an Ikon music video appeared on tv. And so one day, you decided to tease him and hopefully see your boyfriend become an adorable, jealous mess. The two of you were browsing through Netflix shows in your bedroom since it was his free day. You had the remote as you struggled to find something remotely interesting to watch. The two of you slept until late afternoon, yet Chani was still as drowsy as before. You chuckled to yourself as he laid comfortably on your shoulder. Suddenly, he shifted on the bed and got up to go to the bathroom. You found this to be the perfect chance to rile him up so you quickly exited the Netflix page and went to youtube to watch a Chanwoo fancam. Chani came back and slightly flinched in surprise at the tv screen. Your eyes were glued to the tv screen and you ignored him as he crawled back onto the bed and asked, “I thought we were watching a show?” You smiled to yourself and told him you felt like watching Chanwoo dance instead. You were mentally preparing yourself to see Chani act adorably jealous but he took you by surprise and grabbed the remote from you. He turned the tv off and stared at you with dark lust in his eyes. You fell back against the headboard as he hovered over you. He whispered in a deep voice with apparent annoyance and jealousy in his tone, “Chanwoo this. Chanwoo that. It seems like you forgotten who your boyfriend is.” You chuckled nervously and told him you were just joking, but it was too late. Chani pulled the covers over the both of you and lets just say...you eventually got off bed to have your first meal of the day in the late evening.

———

• Yes. These were long. Yes. Some of these gradually got spicy. 🥵 But I couldn’t help it I love the boys agsgsksks •

• Support the boys (and other groups) on kingdom! •

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

I love Painting Red Madonnas! I also love Aro, and while Aro is admittedly...A Lot, it does make me sad that Marcus and Caius are generally depicted (not just in your fic, even Bella suggests it in New Moon) as being all, "Ugh" whenever he talks. Has the man had any fulfilling conversations with anybody since Carlisle left? Obviously Marcus would be uninterested, but Caius? What do you think? (This is now a general question about how you envision the relationship among the leaders, oops)

First off, I’m glad you like my story so much!

Second, this is actually a lot to unpack.

I guess we’ll start on how I see their relationship in general and then move on to why Caius and Marcus both just “ugh” whenever Aro gets going.

I actually think the three Volturi leaders have a very deep bond. First, I think people make Chelsea out to be far more powerful than she actually is. Rather than go into too many details, check out this post. Chelsea is very useful, but more in the sense of changing your priorities slightly or else making someone seem more tolerable or more aggravating. She can’t make something from nothing nor can she render something into nothing.

So, these are three guys who have done this never ending, frankly kind of ridiculous and a little thankless, job for thousands of years that a lot of people just don’t get. (I’d get into why I think the Volturi law is vital for human society stability in Twilight, and that I believe the Volturi are doing this not only for vampires but mostly for mankind, but that’s a post on its own). To stick with it that long requires not just Chelsea, and not simply a shared very strong ideal that never wavers or dims, but a very close sense of friendship, trust, and fraternity.

More, these guys came together with no common bonds, separated from each other by hundreds of years, and well came up with this.

My point being, all three of them I imagine, are very close. They call each other brother, Marcus actually married Aro’s beloved sister, the only thing he took with him from his human life, and here they are three thousand years later. Even Marcus who, albeit with the help of Chelsea, had felt anything less for Aro would undoubtedly killed himself by now.

That said, at this point they’re a bit more like family than I’d say friends. Family, barring grave circumstances, you know entirely too well and you’re stuck with them through thick and thin. They know the best of you and they know the worst of you and you can count on them still being there the next day. This means you know all their annoying habits, quirks, and more and you can’t leave.

Caius is a barbarian king who has no patience for subtlety or gray areas. Someone breaks the law ergo you murder the shit out of them. Done. Let’s go eat dinner. (I imagine Aro despairs of him).

Marcus I imagined, before the death of Didyme, was the voice of mercy in the group. (I could get into why I think this but it’s very headcanony and has to do with a) marrying Didyme b) what little we do see of him in canon c) the fact that Aro has to play the weird role of middle cop/good cop to Caius’ bad cop which makes it likely there was an original, missing, good cop voice). He would be the one advocating for understanding the circumstances of criminals, considering mercy, etc. (which is a very necessary voice to have as much as Caius’ voice is needed). This, I imagine, would have irritated Caius to no end and probably frustrated Aro at times as well. 

Then, of course, Didyme died, Marcus became depressed and barely functional and now Caius and Aro just have no idea what to do with him except that hope that one day he might snap out of it. He never does.

They all have their quirks, just like the rest of us, and things that probably irritate the hell out of the other two.

Which brings us back to Aro.

Aro is, as you mention, a lot.

My god, the man has so much energy. We see very little of him in canon but his enthusiasm and energizer bunny nature practically hops out of the page. Not only that, but his moods sometimes change so fast it’ll give you emotional whiplash. Even if you really really really like Aro, that’s a lot to handle for even a few hours.

Now try handling that for a thousand years. 

Now, try not just handling that, but Aro, with that same enthusiasm, rambling nonsense about Carlisle Cullen for centuries. Bringing up Carlisle Cullen is like accidentally mentioning someone’s beloved dog. Sure, the dog is great, the pictures are cute, but suddenly you’re listening to someone spending hours talking about their goddamn dog. You may like this person, love this person, but how much of this can you take? 

And remember, he likely does talk this much about Carlisle. First, he brings up Carlisle like twenty times when Edward and company are in Volterra. Second, Jane drops a hint that she’s been hearing about Carlisle nearly non-stop for the past few hundred years and was convinced Aro had to be exaggerating. Because this guy can’t actually exist.

And not just that, but I always imagine that conversations with Aro are a bit like talking with Abe Simpson. He gets on these rambling, nonsensical, boring tangents (half of which are about Carlisle Cullen). Aro can be your greatest friend in the whole, wide, world and I am hard pressed to believe you could willingly sit through thousands of years of that without some measure of “Ugh” coming through.

That said, I think Carlisle did sit through Aro’s rambling nonsense and actively enjoyed it. Carlisle in canon gave none of the “ugh” indication that Marcus and Caius gave off. And that’s why Carlisle is Aro’s best friend and part of the reason Aro’s head over heels. 

[applejuizz]

laughter of youth.

the scout regiment has managed to rescue eren and recover annie’s crystal from their enemies, yet at the cost of many soldiers’ lives. levi learns a valuable lesson of trust. characters: levi ackerman x gn! reader (platonic!), historia reiss, sasha braus, jean kirstein, mikasa ackerman, eren jaeger, connie springer warnings: canon violence (vague descriptions), mentions of blood/wounds word count: 1.764 inspired by attack on titan 2: final battle and the story of “our man”, the customizable in-game character.

Paperwork after paperwork after all the paperwork...

Levi had come to dread the sound of hasty footsteps pacing up to his wooden office door and its prolonged creak as Miss Four Eyes allowed themselves in carrying yet another pile of experiment reports, barely containing their unreasonable excitement. While they fervently sought the tiniest free space to fit the monstrosity held in their arms, their flow of Titan anatomy ramblings never ceased.

Levi, you won’t believe what Eren managed to do today...!

Victor - who the hell is Victor? - stood awake the whole night and was as energetic as ever in the morning! This new breed of Titans is quite interesting!

I keep naming these Titans and I won’t shut up already and I should slap myself before you kick me across the fields, Levi! - he couldn’t possibly describe the joy these words would bring him coming out of Hange’s mouth. Too good to be true, unfortunately.

He shifted into his chair, straightening his back and shaking off the annoyance that had been constantly pulling on his nerves for three days already.

Thankfully, his office was quiet and the hallway was blissfully empty. Hange had taken a day off from experiments to let Eren rest. On that note, Jean and Eren had stopped arguing for once, Sasha had ceased her relentless search of meat and he could finally relish in the silence surrounding him. It wasn’t often that he got to have such quiet moments to himself.

And because they were so rare, only when he got the chance to savor them did he realize how much he actually hated them.

It wasn’t that he disliked being alone - on the contrary, he loved solitude a little too much for his own good. Instead, he found that whenever he allowed his mind to rest, he was assaulted by intrusive thoughts and memories that he’d rather bury deep in the back of his consciousness. Perks of being a soldier.

His eyes took in rows and columns of observations on the papers in front of him. His hand signed each and every one of them away promptly, yet his mind was drifting, conjuring up crimson fields, disgusting Titan flesh sliced in half, the blood-curdling screams of soldiers trampled off their horses or chewed to their demise. Nothing he wasn’t used to. However, that didn’t mean it didn’t make his skin crawl sometimes.

He thought back to commander Erwin, weak and thinning, laying in a hospital bed with only an arm left. Levi knew his superior was a strong man; he didn’t worry much about his recovery. What did plant the seed of doubt in his heart was the fact that somehow, the man he’d thought nearly invincible had been so badly wounded, and that alone was a strong indicator of the deep shit they all were in.

And of course, the one member in his squad that had never returned from the battlefield hung dark and heavy over his consciousness, a shadow of guilt, the same damn story repeating itself over and over again. No matter how much he tried to avoid it, it came crawling back like an awful nightmare, looming over him along with the deaths of all the other people he has trusted and cared for. Isabel and Farlan, Petra, Eld, Günther, Oruo… and now them too.

I won’t die on you, sir!

Like hell you won’t.

Their promise rang in his ears as if trying to mock him. The shadows of his consciousness sneered at him: look what happens when you decide to trust people, you twerp. Should’ve known better. Haven’t you learned your lesson?

“Tsk.” He set the cup he’d mindlessly lifted back on his desk. The tea had gone cold. He’d have to ask someone to brew him another. Not exactly pleasant, but enough to distract him from the dark path his thoughts had gone onto.

Before he could even stand up from his chair, though, loud voices boomed from downstairs through the whole hideout and caused the floor beneath his feet to vibrate. They were followed by clattering of pots and Jaeger’s unmistakable yelling, obnoxious and over dramatic as always.

So much for his quiet moment.

With an exasperated sigh, Levi picked up his cup again and left his desk and the piles of papers behind, shaking off the last of his melancholy. These damn brats can’t get anything done without wrecking havoc first…

The kitchen was right beneath his office, so all he had to do was climb down the short flight of stairs, put the cadets back in their place, ask horseface to brew him some more tea and go back upstairs. Simple enough.

He came to the sight of Eren, Jean, Mikasa, Armin, Sasha and Connie all hunched around in a compact group, chattering loudly and all over each other. Historia’s dulcet tone surprisingly prevailed amongst deeper voices, although she was nowhere to be seen.

“Wait! You need bandages before anything else! The gash in your side isn’t looking good…”

“Yeah! You’ve literally been through hell and back!” Jean marvelled.

“No, guys! They need food!” Sasha exclaimed as if she'd made a grand discovery, grabbing a half-boiled potato straight out of the pot.

“Sasha, no! The potatoes aren’t done yet-”

“Oi, what the hell is going on here?!”

“C-Captain Levi!” Jaeger stumbled back on his feet, broom in his hands, his headscarf sitting askew on his head. The huddle immediately dispersed, everyone had gone dead silent. Levi scanned the room quickly, not paying much attention to the soldiers’ faces and rolled his eyes.

“I thought I told you to clean up the kitchen, not turn it into a pigsty!” He passed a critical hand over the table, gathering up the dust in his palm and making a grimace. Cleaning supplies, pots and cups were scattered all over the floor and the table, as if the cadets had all come to a mutual agreement of dropping everything at once just to see how many white hairs Levi would gain in his hair.

“B-but-”

“Get back to work and stop yelping, you’re turning my brain into mush.”

But before he could open his mouth to bark another order at Jean, his eyes finally landed on who was once the centre of the huddle: Historia Reiss holding on to a hunched figure’s arm, obviously attempting to provide support, but ending up resembling more of a lost puppy clinging to someone’s sleeve.

“Captain Levi!” the petite girl exclaimed, a hint of relief present in her voice, “I-I went to get water from the fountain and I found them there! They seem stable, but I think they might need a doctor-”

His thoughts were running at light’s speed, yet he couldn’t get his body to wake up from its frozen state at the bottom of the stairs. What must’ve only been seconds felt like hours. As if time had decided to finally slow down, to finally stop the nonsensical blurry of days, months, years passing by only to give him a chance to breathe. A chance to understand. Was it just too good to be true?

“Captain…?” Springer trailed off, eyes bulging out of his little bald head, and quickly recoiled as Jean subtly elbowed him in the stomach. Only then did Levi notice that he had been standing among the shattered porcelain of what used to be his teacup, his hand still hanging in the air as if clinging to the ghost of the object.

The cadet finally raised their eyes from the floor, face bloodied and battered, yet still brightened by youth and devotion.

“Captain Levi… sir.” They saluted in a weak voice, raising two fingers to their temple.

Their last name rolled off Levi’s lips in a stronger tone than he thought he’d manage, yet still trailed off a bit in disbelief. Clearing his throat, he stepped over the broken porcelain.

“So. You came back, huh?” Out of all the words piled up on the tip of his tongue, begging to spill out, the best he could come up with was a rhetorical question. But the soldier still let out a dry chuckle, straightening their back as much as their wounds allowed them to. Their legs wobbled and the Ackerman girl, who had been quietly watching from the sidelines, immediately jumped in to offer extra support. Seeing the usually stone-faced Mikasa’s facial expression filled with a flurry of emotions similar to those churning in his heart allowed him to relax a bit.

“Of course.” The wounded cadet answered. “I made a promise, didn’t I?”

Levi gave a slight nod, features stoic, yet he felt his heart grow with pride in his chest. The same glint of determination glowed in their eyes as it did back then, during their rookie days, when they had placed their fist over their heart and had sworn to stay alive. He had heard the same promise come out of so many of his dead comrades’ mouths that realistically, he shouldn’t have expected this particular soldier to honor it. Yet for some reason, unknown even to himself, he had chosen to place his fragile trust in them. Maybe it had been their thirst for revenge, or their sheer willpower which, dare he say, could surpass Eren’s; whatever it had been, he did not regret it.

He drew closer, steps light as feathers on the wooden floor and took advantage of their hunched position to card his fingers through their hair, ruffling it affectionately. These damn kids keep getting taller… he thought bitterly to himself. The gesture managed to transform their wince of pain into a look of total and innocent wonder. The look in the eyes of a kid who's just got the utmost gesture of validation from a parent.

“You’re a good kid,” he conceded, patting their scalp twice before letting his hand fall back to his side. He could barely recognize the gentle tone of his own voice. “Although were you not wounded, I’d have roundhouse kicked your ass for scaring everyone like this.”

The phrase hadn’t even been that funny, in his opinion, but they let out a joyous, loud laugh, contagious to the people around them. It even pulled a chuckle out of Mikasa.

And as he stood there in the kitchen, surrounded by the laughter of youth, he finally understood. Placing his trust in these kids, fighting alongside them, protecting them with the price of his life were worth all the risks because they were humanity’s last hope. And he would do anything to one day see their joyful faces wiped clean of crimson wounds and dirt and death. Anything.

[telli1206]

(Per our discussion 😘) It's summer, but Carlos tends to layer up. He falls asleep after a long day out while Jay's in the shower or something, so Jay decides to tuck him in like that and go to bed, but then Carlos starts getting wiggly b/c he's way overheated btwn. his clothes, the blankets, and Jay being a human furnace, so Jay tries to wake him up to get him to strip down so they can both be in peace, but Carlos doesn't wake up and Jay thinks he's faking, so he starts to help things along. 😉

Finally getting the inspo to write this one @hersilentlanguage​, so I hope it was worth the wait 😁

WARNING: Mild smut with sexual implications

Jay grunts and jolts suddenly from the feel of a sharp pain under his arm. He blinks furiously to coax the sleep out of his eyes, the fog in his brain too deep to even register what’s happening.

Not that he really needs to, he kind of already knows what’s going on. It’s always the same person who’s to blame for his shittiest nights of sleep.

Jay should be angry. Fuck, he has every right to be. Is there anything worse than being ripped from a deep sleep by a physical attack? He can’t think of anything. Still, he just sighs and rubs at his side. If he didn’t love the boy so damn much, there’d be nothing stopping him from grabbing him and just chucking him off the bed. And yet...

Auradon may have made him soft, just a little bit. But he’s pretty sure Carlos Oscar De Vil was already well on his way to turning Jay into a teddy bear anyway.

He reaches for the culprit of his pain, managing to curl his fingers around a sock-covered foot before another jab has him wincing and scooting back, positioning himself away from another attack.

“Fuck, ‘Los,” he moans, still gripping tightly to his boyfriend’s foot. “You can be a little shit, you know that?”

Carlos starts to mumble unintelligibly, his nose scrunching adorably as the utter nonsensicals spill from his lips. He’s moving as he tries to talk, his body shifting and wriggling it’s way up the bed, jerking out of Jay’s grasp. He kicks up Jay’s side, bit by bit, scurrying his lithe body upwards until it lands flat and flush against their headboard.

Jay sighs, watching as Carlos finally settles just above his head. His new position on the hard wood of their headboard looks terribly uncomfortable, and Carlos must subconsciously agree as he clearly continues to squirm, batting Jay repeatedly on top of his head with the billow of his sleeve in the process.

“Carlos!” Jay tries again, his voice hushed but firm. He grabs at the sleeve in his face and tugs, but Carlos simply rolls the other way, pressing his body onto the wood with a discontented hum.

Jay huffs as he props himself up on his forearms and turns fully to face Carlos. His plans of going to sleep at the moment have gone to shit, so he may as well try to get Carlos situated again. His best shot at a proper night’s sleep anyway is when he’s wrapped around his favorite warm body, his face pressed into Carlos’ soft expanse of white curls.

So he’s doing this for both of them, really.

Jay carefully snakes an arm under Carlos, moving slowly to keep from jostling him too much and potentially waking him. Once he can reach, he wraps both arms around Carlos and pulls him into his chest, holding him tightly and remaining as motionless as possible, hopeful that the few movements aren’t enough to cause him to stir.

To Jay’s surprise, Carlos hardly startles. Actually, he hardly moves at all. Definitely not what he expected.

He decides to loosen his grip to check on Carlos, and Carlos surprises Jay again by spinning slowly to face him. Though his eyes are pinched closed, Jay can still hear his soft mumblings, coming and going lightly with each breath.

“‘Los?” Jay leans in closer, pressing their foreheads together as he tries to focus on his boyfriend’s words.

Carlos moans at the contact and pushes in even closer so they’re practically cheek to cheek. He’s slick with sweat, and Jay can feel the dampness and heat radiating off of him. Jay reaches over to cup Carlos’ cheek, running his fingers gingerly over the moist skin.

“Fuck, I’m sorry pup,” he sighs, pulling back. “I shouldn’t have let you sleep in all this shit. It’s way too hot.” He thumbs at the zipper of Carlos’ hoodie with one hand while his other moves to Carlos’ head, gently pushing his red beanie back until it slides off and drops behind them and onto the floor.

Despite today being sunny and warm, Carlos had opted to layer up his clothing as usual, throwing Jay’s hoodie and beanie on over his shorts and t-shirt. It’s a habit that Carlos just can’t seem to shake. But, after years of Carlos feeling that he needs to hide...both his imperfections and his existence as a whole, no one had really expected for him to change that overnight.

Besides, Jay is more than happy to see Carlos wearing his clothes. He doesn’t want to look possessive, but, he really is. Especially when it comes to Carlos. He’s been dying to claim the cute freckled boy since they met, and it finally feels safe, normal even, to do that in Auradon. So he’ll gladly take every chance he can get to show that Carlos is...well...his.

It’s not like anyone is complaining about it anyway. Carlos is fucking adorable when he’s in clothes that are too big for him. That’s just common knowledge.

Still, Carlos overdid it with the layers today. And Jay scolds himself for being a lazy boyfriend and just dropping Carlos in bed to sleep instead of helping him change first into something less...suffocating.

He’s definitely paying for that choice now.

Carlos gasps when the beanie falls away and exposes his head to the cool air of their room. He tips his head back to shake out his matted down curls, relaxing back into Jay with a sigh of relief and resting his head on Jay’s shoulder.

“Does that feel good, pup? Do you want me to take off a little more? Cool you off?”

Jay reaches for Carlos’ zipper again, dragging it down slowly just an inch or so and then stops, waiting for Carlos’ reaction.

“Just say ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ Whatever you want I’ll do it. I just wanna help you sleep.”

Carlos is quiet, his head unmoving from Jay’s shoulder. Jay breathes soft and shallow, his hand still frozen at Carlos’ zipper as he listens for any type of response from him. But the silence hangs in the air for over a minute, and Jay is starting to wonder exactly how deeply his boyfriend may be sleeping.

Finally, Carlos starts to shift, moving his hips slightly to bring his body even closer to Jay’s. He drapes a leg across Jay’s waist as he tilts his head up to bring his lips to Jay’s ear. He doesn’t speak, instead choosing to kiss his way down the shell of Jay’s ear, stopping only to tug at Jay’s lobe with his teeth.

“Pupppp,” he moans, biting down hard on his lip to muffle the sound. His hands fly to Carlos’ hips, squeezing tightly as Carlos’ kissing continues its way down his jaw to his neck.

“I didn’t think undressing you would get you in the mood that easy, but I’m not gonna complain,” Jay chuckles. But his laughter fades away with his breath when Carlos bites down on the junction of his neck and starts to suck at his most sensitive spot.

Jay chokes, his mind numbing with pleasure as he starts to fumble for Carlos’ hoodie again, this time grabbing the zipper roughly and ripping it down. Carlos is still latched to his neck as he pushes the sleeves down, quickly freeing Carlos of his hoodie and dropping it to the floor to join his beanie.

When Carlos’ mouth finally detaches from Jay, he takes the opportunity to dip down and kiss over Carlos’ collarbone, letting his hands glide down Carlo’s t-shirt as he does so. When he reaches the bottom he hooks his fingers under the hem, pulling away for only a second to tug it over Carlos’ head and toss it aside.

Carlos hums his approval, his eyes still closed but his mouth spread wide in his most pleased smile. He looks utterly content when Jay starts to kiss fervently over the newly exposed freckled skin of Carlos’ chest, flushed and warm under his lips.

Jay smiles against Carlos’ shuddered breaths, his body responding almost desperately for more of Jay’s touch. And Jay is eager to please. He kisses his way down Carlos’ stomach, reaching for the button of his shorts as his mouth descends closer. Within seconds he has them unbuttoned and unzipped, and they’re off and on the ground before Carlos can react.

Not that he would. He’s already distracted himself with the skin of Jay’s neck, scraping his teeth along it and mouthing lightly at Jay’s pulse.

Jay is encouraged further by Carlos’ moans, hot and tingly against his skin. He snakes both of his hands down the back of Carlos’ boxers, grazing along skin that’s too soft, and feels too delicious against his own. He stops to  playfully squeeze at firm cheeks, as perfect and perky as he’s ever had the pleasure of touching. He peppers kisses at Carlos’ shoulder, massaging tenderly with his hands before lifting his arms to slide the material down--

“Uh. Um. J-Jay?”

Jay stills in his movements. “Yeah, Pup?”

He shifts backwards, his eyes searching for Carlos’ in the dim twilight. But when their gazes meet, Jay can feel guilt pooling in his gut.

Carlos’ eyes are wide...confused. There’s no recognition in his features at all, no indication left of the passion he and Jay were engaging in just moments ago. Jay releases his grip when he feels Carlos start to squirm, sliding his hands out of Carlos’ boxers and urging some space between their bodies.

“Are we...is th-this...”

Jay winces at the uncertainty in Carlos’ tone. His brow furrows, unable to hide his worry.

“Shit ‘Los, I’m sorry. I thought you were...I thought we were...were you not, into it? Evil, if I did something you didn’t want, I swear I didn’t mean to-”

Carlos puts a finger to Jay’s lips to end his ramblings. Jay complies, laying silent as he stares into Carlos’ deep brown eyes. They’re more alert now, but laced with softness, and they stare back at Jay with an intensity that’s making his heart constrict and his breath hitch. When the finger is dragged away from Jay’s lips, Carlos is quick to replace it with a tentative kiss, light and airy with barely a brush of contact.

“Jay.”

Jay opens his eyes, unsure as to when he even closed them. Carlos is smiling at him now, bright and toothy and so, so beautiful. Jay silently hopes his damn eyelids didn’t deny him of this for too long. Every single one of Carlos’ smiles is his favorite thing in the world.

“Jay,” Carlos repeats, brushing his fingers across Jay’s cheek. “Are you good now? I swear, you’re too damn sweet for your own good sometimes.”

Jay blinks and blinks, his face blank as tries to understand what he thinks he heard.

“Too...sweet?”

Carlos shakes his head and laughs. With a swing of his hips, he flips Jay onto his back and rolls on top of him. When Carlos sits up, he’s straddling Jay’s waist and looking into surprised eyes. He smirks and flicks a finger to Jay’s chin, snapping shut his slightly agape expression.

“I thought I was dreaming, Jay. That’s all. I know you’d never mean to do anything I didn’t want to. I’d never think that. You’re so good to me.”

Jay exhales, grinning up at Carlos, who leans in for another kiss.

“Ok, thanks pup. I-”

He’s cut off by Carlos squeezing his face and pressing a kiss down firmly onto his pursed lips.

“Besides,” he mumbles against Jay’s mouth, “Who the hell would complain about waking up to their dreams coming true?”

Carlos slips his hands underneath Jay’s shirt, splaying them out as he sits back upright with a cocky grin.

“Now, can you fill me in on what we were doing? Because I’d like to continue.”

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

That post about “your first anime” has got me both nostalgic, and feeling the need to tell rambling stories to young people like Grandpa Simpson. 

So......when I was growing up in the 80′s and 90′s, there was definitely anime that I didn’t recognize as anime as a young child.  Like:

Christian anime!  Produced through an agreement between the Christian broadcasting network and Tatsunoko Productions in Japan, this biblical fever dream weirdness was one of my least favorite Saturday morning cartoons.  There was also one called The Flying House.  If I had a nickel for every Christian anime I’ve seen featuring children time-traveling through Bible stories accompanied by a robot, I’d have....well, two nickels, but it’s really weird that it happened twice. 

And:

Noozles!  The show about magic koalas from another dimension that is basically fantasy Australia.  I remember liking this one, when the dub was broadcast on Nickelodeon. 

And many others, also mostly on Nickelodeon or various networks on Saturday mornings: Maple Town, The Little Koala (Japan apparently went through a Koala phase), Mysterious Cities of Gold, The Little Prince.  Some I liked more than others.  I had no idea it was Japanese, just that the animation looked weird to me.  I usually preferred things like She-Ra or My Little Pony. 

When the dubbed Sailor Moon and Dragon Ball Z came to TV in the early 90′s, many people did indeed realize that it was Japanese, despite DIC’s best attempts to erase all cultural references by dubbing onigiri as “muffins” and other such nonsense.  Even as a child, I heard through the grapevine that it was Japanese, because the anime community in the US was starting to grow.  (Or rather, the pre-existing anime community was further expanding.)

Sailor Moon was the one that won me over, even with the shitty, heavily-censored DIC dub.  I started out making fun of it, but I think we all know that if you religiously watch something to “make fun of it,” deep down you secretly like it.  Just a little bit.  I was into the beautiful transformation sequences, and the opening theme and the outfits and the magic powers.  It was like nothing I’d ever seen, in a good way.

This show was just so incredibly pretty, and honestly, the nude transformation never seemed all that sexual to me.  There are plenty of other anime to watch for over the top fanservice, this series was about girls’ power fantasies. 

And eventually, my friend’s relative hooked us up with video tapes of fan-subbed, uncensored Japanese Sailor Moon, with physical violence left intact (and eventually, Uranus and Neptune being actual lesbians, not “cousins.”)  I was completely blown away, and absolutely hooked.

After that, I watched whatever anime I could find, but in mid-to-late 90′s America, the choices were mostly whatever dubbed series Sci-fi channel put on their Saturday Anime and whatever dubbed videos were available in the small section at Blockbuster, all of which would be marked “Adults Only” regardless of actual content.

I watched:

This series of movies was so fucking stupid, and I loved them all.  Apparently it was originally supposed to be an erotic series, but it was changed to be mainstream.  It parodies a lot of earlier anime, and is just the weirdest goofy shit.  Also A-ko and B-ko are totally in love.  Fighting over C-ko is just an excuse.

Early high fantasy anime, which I still own on DVD.  They played a dub of the first few episodes on Saturday Anime.  The OAV series has beautiful animation, and a cast of interesting side characters surrounding our very boring knight main character.  That ugly, long-haired sleazy-looking fellow up there in the top left of the group is another of my early obsessive faves.  He’s a thief, and yes, I have a type.

Also:

I found this series at Blockbuster, and it’s 80′s-tastic!  Four women fighting crime in high-powered robot suites, and one of them is a punk rock singer.  What’s not to like? 

There was also Tenchi Muyo, which is one of those series that I think would improve greatly if you just removed the main character in the center of it all.  Or at least removed the dull-ass love triangle.  You’ve got a cast full of super-powered aliens, I don’t need to watch them fight over the wet-cardboard protagonist.  And wow, that animation style is so very 90′s.  I also watched stuff that was definitely meant for adults, like Akira (an absolute classic), and a sci-fi horror Alien rip-off called Lily C.A.T.

Eventually, I got to the point where I could start buying videos, when anime was mostly sold on video tape and you got like, two episodes per tape.  And for some reason the sub was more expensive than the dub.  You still mostly had to go to specialty stores for a wide selection, but it started to filter into Best Buy and make it’s way into DVD.  Basically, you all have no idea the incredible selection we’ve got nowadays on streaming services.  Back in the day, you had to track down whatever videos you could find, and it was way too expensive to even finish a series, unless you got it all boot-legged.  My friends also started buying videos, and through tape trading I got to watch stuff like:

and

Slayers, which was way less serious than this art is making it look.  I don’t know how well these series have aged.  When I tried to rewatch Ranma 1/2 awhile back, it started to wear on my nerves with repetitive humor, but I think I could still enjoy Slayers, in a turn-your-brain-off kinda way.

I also wound up watching Devil Hunter Yoko, which is definitely more adult than these other series, and a couple of series that were just basically soft-core porn.  Because everything being marked for adults meant it was hard to tell what was just a little bloody or flashed the occasional cartoon boob, and what was actually magic sex fantasies.  

Then eventually I went to college, joined the anime club, and watched stuff like Vision of Escaflowne, Revolutionary Girl Utena, and Berzerk.

That’s the story of my anime awakening, which, in fact, had fuck all to do with Death Note.

I’m sure there’s probably someone even older somewhere out there on Tumblr that can tell the story of cutting their anime teeth on Star Blazers and Robotech.

[darkwingsofimagination]

I have like a million important stuff to do, but since I need to take my mind off things for a while let me take you on another Madre Sólo Hay Dos ramble post! You know the drill, SPOILER ALERT!

I decided to rewacth the show like in less than a week after seeing the first time, however I kept postponing the last episode, anyway I finally ripped the band-aid off last night. And here are some things I want to talk about:

1 - the kitchen scene between Ana and Mariana.

I think that Mariana was on the verge of telling Ana that she had kissed her, would probably play off as just a joke and blame on the alcohol and the drugs - even if I do think she knew or at least felt it was more than that - but as soon as she saw Ana's face on the whole existential topic she looked like she forgot about it and was just so worried (and once again, thank you Paulina for the best facial microexpressions I've seen in a while.) And I love how she just drops everything to accompany Ana to the hospital and I feel really bad for her for keeping her mom's secret (yes, I know she could've told her, but I already talked about my views on this, so I won't press on this again).

2 - Pablo and Elena scenes

I really think these two could be very good friends to each other and Mariana if they get their heads out of their asses (and heal their broken hearts). I loved how Mariana didn't even think twice before refusing to live with them because Ana needs her and even she didn't seem so sure about her feelings she looked pretty certain about not being away from Ana.

After Mariana refused moving with the two of them because of Ana, it was becoming obvious to Elena there was something going on between them, after all she did see Ana kiss Mariana, but since she wasn't sure she added fuel to the fire and talked Pablo into talking to Mariana - do I think she meant for him to propose? I don't think so. I do think, however, that she just wanted to be sure she - both of them, really - hadn't lost Mariana to someone they never saw coming and it was so different from both of them, from Mariana herself, that they wouldn't even know how to begin to "compete" with Ana.

I did really like that not for one moment she felt like maybe accepting Pablo's proposal (and not just because I want her and Ana together, but also for how it showed some growth and maturity from her. I don't agree that she ever sent him mixed signals, she was always very clear with him that she not did want to go back, but I do like the certainty she showed while rejecting him, without hesitating, without second guessing herself) and the way she said she was not the same and nor was still in love with him, it was really well done, and it seemed to pave the way to help her realize other feelings.

3 - Ana and Mariana's scenes before the baptism

I loved how both of them came to an agreement quickly and easily of what they would do for the girls. But also I love how a) Mariana was the only one to know about Ana's cancer and respected her and kept her mouth shut (at least she can keep secrets); b) the fact Mariana relented in doing something to please Ana, and that Ana compromised in doing something Mariana was comfortable with instead of forcing a baptism for both babies; c) Ana wanting to do another "chin chan pu" looks kinda silly but it's actually really meaningful, it was they decided to go live together after all. D) and this is a bonus: how both of them talked about the babies future (imagining how to explain why one was baptized but not the other) and never for once considered that they (moms and babies) would be apart - there was mentioning of Juan Carlos not being there but never that the girls might question who the other were because it just seemed natural to grow up together and as sisters and I found this incredibly sweet and beautiful.

The scene where Ana insists on inviting Tere it's short but it does have two highlights to me and that is Ana taking Mariana's hands in hers - they way she does it, so gently, so careful, caressing and looking into the her eyes - and saying it is very important to her that Mariana's family was there and Mariana looking at their hands together and listening to Ana - she looks like right at tha moment she is remembering Ana saying "te amo" and even if she may not be sure of how she feels about it she does not pull away (and maybe, just maybe a little bit of gay panic because not knowing how she feels and not pulling away is scarier than knowing she feels nothing more than friendship).

Also the scene where Mariana is taking pictures of the babies and the way Ana looks at her once she looks down to the camera and smiles - it was a look of pure awe, love and admiration (I honestly want someone to look at me like that) - and I love how Mariana is oblivious to it, to me it showed that Ana just may be on the way to understanding her feelings, that is if she didn't already and whilst sober.

4 -the baptism

I already talked about their bonding scene which is wedding vows worthy and I think everyone can agree on that (and how it's only then Mariana realizes she loves Ana).

I want talk about 2 scenes and it might get a little language nerdy right now and I just might be talking nonsense due to a lot of stress but here we go.

Once Ana listens to Juan Carlos and Tere and then proceeds to confront him, he tries to hold her arm and she says "let me go".

Now you must be wondering where the hell am I going with this. Very well, when she says "let me go" Juan Carlos had barely touched her so to me this phrase was more than to stop him from trying to hold her, to me it felt like she was maybe pleading (not that she would ever beg, but something akin to it) to him to let her go, let their marriage go, because the damage was done and there was no going back. She could have easily told him to go, instead she told him to let her go, and this choice of words speaks volumes to me because up until that moment, those scenes we weren't certain that would get a divorce, and Ana being Ana she might have tried, which is why when she says let me go I see as way of her excusing herself of the guilt she might feel in asking for a divorce (after all he made her feel guilty about working and about ending 20 yeas of marriage whe he was the one who cheated first and never tried to understand her).

When she confronts Mariana about knowing it and the girl tries to get close to her she says "no te acerques" which means "don't come close".

Which I feel like it was something similar with JC, 'cause when she says to her not come close she could easily have said "closer", because the physical distance would help her bring her walls up once again and she could have sent her away right at this moment, she doesn't and keeps pouring her heart out on how betrayed she felt, however Mariana cuts her out by not only getting closer but also kissing her and when she asks "¿qué haces?", "what are you doing?", I don't think is not just the shock of being kissed but the shock of how even after asking and after building her emotionals barries up once again Mariana kept defying and breaking them - and her, in a way.

And the fact that she sent Mariana away after the kiss and the "estoy enamorada de ti" also says a lot because 1) there were a thousand thoughts running through her head already, she might have cancer, she resigned from the job she loved so much, and having to deal with the fact she knew her husband mistress, (not to mention he never said when they were together, so she must have thought it was after the babies were mixed up), and a betrayal from her best friend, she was overwhelmed; 2) I don't think she was 100% sure of her own feelings yet (almost there but not there yet); 3) even if she were I don't think she was expecting Mariana to love her back; 4) she really believes she may be dying soon so she might find it better to push the girl away now than to have her suffer more in the future, even if it means she will suffer a lot more - without her best friend, her other daughter and a failed marriage.

And thanks for coming to another of my TedTalks on Madre Sólo Hay Dos.

[blu-joons]

DATING PENTAGON A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴  Yeo Changgu

A ⇴ AFFECTION 

Changgu loves to get cuddly with you, he enjoys being able to relax with his arms around you, even just for a few seconds, forgetting about how hectic his life is, means a lot to him, finding comfort in your touch.

B ⇴ BEFORE DATING 

When the two of you first met, Changgu was incredibly shy, Jinho ended up having to tell you his name because he was so quiet around you. Slowly though, as the two of you got to know each other a little better, those walls began to break down and the two of you got to know each other probably at work.

C ⇴ CONFESSION 

You’d forgotten how shy Changgu ever was when it came to his confession, he ended up rambling for what felt like forever in front of you, telling you exactly how he felt about you, making sure that he didn’t miss out a single detail. He ended up talking your ear off for most of the evening, eventually getting to his confession after almost an hour, surprised to see you still awake in front of him and nodding his head.

D ⇴ DATES 

Changgu enjoys being able to relax alongside you at the end of the day, curling up on his bed and watching a drama, or at least trying to get in a few episodes before one of you falls asleep. As mentioned earlier, being able to be around you and have your touch on him helps him to forget about his day and focuses his mind on the programme that the two of you are watching. It’ll usually end up being Changgu that falls asleep curled into you first, to which you always make sure to pause the drama, otherwise he’ll kill you in the morning.

E ⇴ EXPERIENCE 

He’s very open with you from the start about the concerns he has about your relationship, how he worries about you, the fans, and the group too, but never himself. Once he gets talking on his worries, whether its around you, his family, or the group, it’s another time when it’s pretty difficult to shut him up. He tends to waffle a lot, his mind turns into a vicious cycle, when one concern crops up for him, it’s not long until a few more arise and he really finds himself getting into a bit of a spin in front of whoever’s listening.

F ⇴ FIGHTING 

Anytime the two of you begin to argue with one another, the shy side of Changgu you knew when you first met comes out to play. It’s the one time you’ll find him quite opposite, and quiet, he’ll never quite know what to say out of fear of getting it wrong and ending up making the situation worse between the two of you. Arguing is one thing Changgu hates, more than anything in the world, he’ll often freeze in the situation and zone out. Then, once you’ve offloaded, as calmly as he can, he’ll try and work through whatever the issue was and try and talk with you like adults, without all the shouting.

G ⇴ GETTING TO KNOW HIS FAMILY 

The first person you met was Changgu’s older sister, which quickly turned into a decision Changgu regretted. From the moment you met, the two of you were a little tag team against him, sharing all your terrible stories and embarrassing memories you had of him, ignoring just how embarrassed it often made him in front of you.

H ⇴ HOME 

Changgu loved the dorm and having people around him all of the time, which you understood, especially as he had his own room too. You were in no rush to make him move out, in fact you enjoyed spending time with the other members too and getting to know some of the most important people in his life.

I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU” 

It became a habit of Changgu’s around you to ramble whenever he was talking about his feelings, so much so that he ended up accidentally telling you that he loved you on one specific occasion. He almost skipped by it, until you held your hand out for him to stop, asking him to repeat what he’d just said, making sure you heard him correctly.

J ⇴ JEALOUSY 

Whenever Changgu feels jealous, you’ll be able to tell by how quiet he becomes. He can talk to most people, and hold a conversation pretty well, so when you feel as if he’s starting to slip out of a conversation, you’ll know what’s wrong. It’s a steady decline, slowly feeling his confidence disappear and his shyness creep in, fearful as to what might happen. Luckily for him, by that point, you’ve usually picked up on what’s going on, stepping in and reassuring him before he disengages too heavily with what’s going on.

K ⇴ KIDS 

The future is another thing that Changgu will love to look forward to with you, he can’t help himself but get excited when he thinks about all the things you could do together in the future. And one of those things is definitely start a family, the thought of having a family has always excited Changgu but knowing that he now has you to dream about it with, makes him happier than he could ever explain to you.

L ⇴ LAUGHTER 

You can’t help but laugh at things that often come out of Changgu’s mouth, you’re not sure how one person can talk so much, and talk so much nonsense at the same time, but somehow Changgu manages. He’ll often end up having to stop talking to ask you what’s so funny, as you sit before him in fits of giggles, trying to make sense of what he’s said. Changgu himself is usually unaware of the things that he says but knowing that whatever it was that was said has ended up putting a smile on his face, will be more than enough for him, quickly picking back up where he left up on his one-sided conversation.

M ⇴ MISSING 

It’s easy for anyone to pick up on when Changgu’s missing you, because like when he’s jealous, he’ll become very quiet indeed. When he’s not laughing at a joke, or not chiming into conversation, the other members will know exactly what’s going on, instantly checking in on him and trying to bring the smile back to his face. They know it’s hard for him to constantly be the chatty one in the group when his mind can only think of you, and so they’ll always support him when he feels like he needs a bit of quiet, but as soon as he’s feeling better and ready to talk again, they’ll be there to listen, no matter how sometimes reluctant they are.

N ⇴ NICKNAMES 

You always call Changgu your ‘chatterbox,’ because he really doesn’t stop talking. You love how chatty he can be, around him, you’re guaranteed to pretty much never get a moment of peace and quiet to enjoy the silence.

O ⇴ OBSESSION 

He’s obsessed with your smile, knowing that you’re happy with him is the only thing that Changgu ever wants, anything else is simply just an added bonus.

P ⇴ PDA 

Keeping your safe is the only thing Changgu worries about whenever he’s affectionate with you in public. Whilst he can talk his way out of most situations, it’s not always the same for you, and so he’ll usually use his arms a little more to a clear a way for you both and make sure that you’re as relaxed as can be.

Q ⇴ QUESTIONS 

If Changgu is ever quiet around you, you’ll always make sure to ask him if he’s alright, concerned as to why he’s fallen so silent. That’s how uncharacteristic it is of him to be quiet, always making you worry just a little bit.

R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS 

Changgu loves to take photos of you, especially one where he knows you’re not paying attention. He’ll often pull out his phone when he notices you staring off into the distance, snapping a quick photo and making sure to save it to the album that is specifically dedicated to all of the candid photos he has of you, always looking through it whenever he’s missing you, especially so when he’s on the road.

S ⇴ SEX 

When the two of you are intimate, Changgu is always very attentive to what you want from him, and a great speaker too. Those rambles he often gives when he wants to tell you how he feels will turn into quieter whispers of sweet nothings in your ear, making sure that you’re always shy. He’s always open with his heart, especially so when the two of you are intimate, making sure you feel as loved as you possibly can.

T ⇴ TEXTS 

After every mealtime, you sit by your phone and wait for the text to come through from Changgu to make sure that you’re eating. It’s his biggest worry, making sure that you’re taking care of yourself, so he’ll always check in.

U ⇴ UNIVERSE 

Having someone there to always listen, whether it’s good or bad, funny or emotional, means a lot to Changgu. He knows he can talk most people’s ears off, and yet you’ll always listen to his every word and pay him your full attention.

V ⇴ VACATION 

Anywhere in the world you want to go, Changgu will take you when the two of you get the chance to go away. He’s been to enough places through tours and schedules, he much prefers to give you the chance to tick somewhere off your bucket list, no matter how much you argue that it might be somewhere he’s been before.

W ⇴ WHINING 

It’s almost natural of Changgu to whine when he’s talking to you about something frustrating, he almost doesn’t realise he’s doing it most of the time.  

X ⇴ XXXXX 

The place he’ll love to kiss the most is always the top of your head; he loves being able to rest on top of you and press you tightly against his chest. For you, you’ll normally find yourself having to kiss against his lips, just so you can get a moment of silence to yourself. A kiss on the lips is a sign that Changgu can very quickly pick up on, muttering a quick apology before finally telling himself to stop talking for a while.

Y ⇴ YOU 

You were a great listener, somehow you always paid attention to every single word.

Z ⇴ ZZZ 

The quiet you got at night-time was always well received, although you would often end up falling asleep listening to Changgu mutter to himself about anything that came to mind, knowing you probably switched off long ago.

---

Masterlist

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

Hypothetically,

Ao3,   MasterPost

Relationships: Romantic Intrulogical, Platonic Logince

It is about! Damn! Time! That I wrote some Intrulogical! Also, y’all already know my stance on platonic logince,,,, guys they ARE best friends i’m sorry I don’t make the rules.

Warnings: Angst (with a happy ending). mentions of stuff like autopsies and nuclear explosions in the context of like experiments- they do stuff in The Imagination, basically. Panic attack (?). Hurt/comfort. Pretty heated kissing; It’s more intense makin’ out than I usually write but it isn’t anything explicit at all, don’t worry! ADHD Remus and Autistic Logan. Cursing- like So Much Cursing. Mentions of space, deep sea, etc. Food mention.

Word count: 6,769

There was a conundrum. 

A., Logan needed to use the Imagination. B., He could not use it on his own, considering that he was Logic. C., Roman was nowhere to be found. The answer to what was frustrating Logan at that moment would be all of the above.

To be clear, he didn’t like going into the Imagination. It was simply the only suitable place to perform his ‘experiments’. His very necessary, very distracting experiments. But, as stated, Roman was God-knows-where doing God-knows-what. 

Logan sighed at the door, as though it was the inanimate structure’s fault. The cracks gleamed obnoxiously bright, golden light pouring out from behind the door in a somewhat eerie manner. It was a nonsensical, unrealistic, completely insignificant place, and he wanted in.

Logan was contemplating asking Janus for help (lies took imagination, right?) when, out of nowhere, an arm was thrown around his shoulders. Literally an arm, disembodied and oozing sick-smelling blood onto the carpet. Ah. Wonderful. 

“Hello, Remus,” he pulled the appendage from around him, holding it at arm’s length (no pun intended, dammit). 

“Hi!” Remus took his arm back and reattached it with a disturbing crunch, a grin stretching his face. He sidled up to Logan, imitating the side’s stance in front of the door. 

“Can I help you with something?” the logical trait tilted his shoulder away from where Remus had pressed against him. 

“Not unless you’re willing to get really messy- but I can help you!”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re implying.”

The Duke rolled his eyes, promptly flinging the door to The Imagination open. An encompassing energy radiated into the common room, corrupting the usual neutrality of the space. It didn't last long before Remus grabbed Logan’s wrist and dragged him along through the entryway, movements as sporadic and fast-paced as everything else about the creative.

“It’s not very logical to just stand there staring at the door all day, in my opinion. I dunno what you need Imagination for, but whatever it is, I can help! My half is much more interesting, anyway.”

“Oh,” Logan blinked, narrowly ducking his head under a branch as he was pulled forward, “Thank you, I suppose.”

He politely didn’t mention that he doubted Remus’ capacity for helpfulness. Beggars can’t be choosers, after all. 

The door from the commons was quite a walk from the darker half of The Imagination, but at the pace its owner had them going they were there in minutes. The border was marked with tangles of densely thorned shrubbery, which parted for them, as if they sensed the approach. Logan just barely avoided snagging his shoe on one as they passed.

There was forest, twisted and shadowy, for only a minute. After that, they were in a city, with tall buildings and winding streets and dark alleys. Another switch, they came into what seemed like an amusement park. Nothing was consistent in theme, and none of the scenes held up for more than a minute or two. Remus shook his head and tisked. With a snap, a good portion of the ever-changing scenery was erased, leaving blank white space. The Duke turned to look at Logan with a satisfied smile. 

“Ta-da! What do you need?” 

Logan blanched for a moment, surprised at Remus’ willingness to completely delete Imaginings without a second thought. It usually took Roman ages to find a spot that he was okay with giving up on for Logan’s “projects”- which he always had thought was a little silly, seeing as he could bring it back when they were done. The change of pace was a pleasant one, though, so there was no need to dawdle for long. 

“I need a miniature fully-functioning model of our solar system. If it’s not too much trouble.”

“Oh, totally,” Remus waved his hand and the request appeared suspended in the air, spread out to be the size of a dining table. All was accounted for- sun, moons, eight planets plus pluto- orbiting and spinning around each other. Imagination, by nature, had no real limits, but the detail was still a sight to behold every time. Logic smiled, surveying the set-up, before gesturing to the edge of their blank section.

“Thank you for the help, you may go.”

“May I now?” Remus conjured a seat for himself, staring at Logan with his chin resting on his hands, “You’re not even going to tell me what this is for? That’s just rude.”

Logan glanced up from the tiny earth he was inspecting, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

“You are welcome to stay, if you wish, but your brother usually leaves at this point. He says my experiments are-” he summons his notebook, “‘Bore-ifying’, which I assume is a portmanteau for ‘boring’ and ‘horrifying’.” 

“Roman’s a big baby!”

Logan shrugged, not disagreeing, and resumed his careful observation of the tiny model earth. Remus made no move to go, wheeling his chair even closer. The scientific side carried on before his new audience of one, hovering a hand over the little planet. Abruptly, it stopped spinning. Logan made a gesture with his hand that magnified the model significantly. 

The results were immediately catastrophic. Logan jotted a few observations down in his notebook, watching closely at the ways torrents of wind ripped up trees and buildings. In the back of his mind, he was faintly impressed by just how well-rendered ‘Dark’ Creativity’s earth was, down to the individual humans, brutalized by the storms. 

“Whoah, what the fuck?!” 

Logan looked up briefly to see Remus craning his head over the destruction of the stilled planet. His eyes were wide and bright with curiosity.

“Oh- I should probably explain. I come here, usually, to run some improbable scenarios as a sort of stress-reliever. Specifically, this one is what would happen if earth stopped spinning on its axis. As you can see, due to the earth no longer rotating at its usual speed, the wind would continue on at-” he cut himself off abruptly, sensing the beginnings of a ramble, “I’m sorry, I’ve been told that I have a tendency to ‘go off’ when a subject particularly interests me.”

Remus rolled his chair even closer, looking much like an excited animal (more so than usual, anyway).

“Well then, go off! Don’t leave me hanging! Is that really what would happen, just if it stopped?” He gestured enthusiastically to the way that the oceans had begun to crash against and consume shorelines. He looked interested- genuinely interested. 

Logan bit back a smile. He didn’t have to be told twice. 

 It was one of those particularly restless nights. For no foreseeable goddamn reason, Logic’s mind had become alight with enough half-formed thoughts and barely sensible ideas to fill a very, very weird book. The Imagination did wonders when he got like this, but it usually wasn’t two in the morning when he needed to use it. That wasn’t to say the circumstance was unheard of, but all times prior he could push the urge to investigate away with the reasoning that he could just ask Roman in the morning, and that the Creative side needed his ‘beauty sleep’, as he called it. There wasn’t anything he could do about that, was there?

Tonight was different. Logan could hear the occasional snap or tear or cackle from the room across from his. Remus’ room. 

It had been less than a week since The Duke let him use the darker half of the Mindpalace, and that was pretty much the only meaningful interaction they’d had in as many days. They weren’t close, Logan wasn’t even sure if they were friends (not that he was a good judge of that, given the first time Roman referred to them as ‘besties’ he had all but cried), but Remus was at the very least an option. He was also unlikely to mind, given that he was already awake and had exhibited excitement previously. 

Logan made up his mind after yet again failing to fall asleep. Quietly, he opened his door and took the few short steps across the hall, raising his fist. Remus’ door was open before his second knock. 

“Oh, hey! What are you doing, coming knocking at this hour?” he didn’t even try to whisper, accompanying his statement with an over-exaggerated wink. Logan didn’t waste his time trying to shush the side. 

“Good evening, I hope I’m not interrupting anything-”

“You know I don’t mind your ‘interruptions’, Twunk-y Megamind!”

“-But I was wondering if you would… Help me, again. I seem to be having a hard time getting to sleep, and I think that getting out some of my ideas could help.”

Remus’ face lit up dramatically. 

“Oh hell yes! Are we gonna blow up more planets?”

“Something like that,” he kept his voice monotone, disguising the relief and hint of pride at such a positive reaction. 

“Well, come on!”

Logan let himself be dragged into Remus’ room, barely having time to make note of the surprisingly organized layout before he was pulled through a sleek black door. 

“But you have to tell me about it,” he ordered, twisting them through narrow paths in his half of The Imagination. Logan suppressed a smile. 

“If you want to hear it, then I’m happy to.” 

Without warning, they stopped the breakneck pace that Remus moved at. The trait seemed appeased with their surroundings, though as far as Logan could tell it was just another piece of ever-shifting ominous landscape. 

Remus snapped his fingers. The scene remained intact. 

“Sorry,” he glanced around nervously, “Things get stuck in my head sometimes. Can’t get ‘em out. I’ll get it, I just-”

“It’s no trouble.” 

Logan rolled up his sleeves. He didn’t like using his ‘abilities’ much, as every side had some set of special skills, and all of them were much too ostentatious. But they were helpful, at times. He waved a hand, gesturing carefully so that he didn’t dismantle any more of The Imagination than was absolutely necessary. With a small stutter, the landscape shifted to a blank slate.

When he looked back up, Remus’ expression was not unlike that of a Cheshire cat.

“What was that?”

“I am Logic, therefore it follows that I am the antithesis to any Imagination creations. It’s very easy to erase them with just a bit of rationality.” 

“No clue what a lot of those words meant, but it’s still cool that you can destroy shit.”

Laughing was unbecoming, to say the least, and so the logical trait tended to avoid it at all costs. The snort that escaped him was entirely involuntary. 

If Remus noticed the noise, he said nothing about it. He was too busy bouncing from foot to foot, expectantly waiting for instructions. Logan cleared his throat of the outburst and clapped his hands together.

“Alright, let’s start with something simple…”

 At his request, Remus would construct immaculately detailed creatures, settings, and models, watching gleefully at the ordeals Logan put each one through. They tested various and progressively elaborate ways to sink populated cruise liners, they simulated the effects of falling from the Empire State Building, dissected approximations of obscure marine animals (a shared special interest of theirs, apparently), and any of the other unrealistic questions that occurred to the typically rational Logic. 

The only way to get such questions from his mind, he’d found out a long time ago, was deconstructing them one step at a time, to see them in their full ridiculousness. 

It was also, he was coming to realize, incredibly fun. 

Before the two knew it, the already late hour had turned unreasonable. Logan blinked owlishly at his watch, distracted from the tiny supernova that he’d created.

“Oh, I must have lost track of time,” four in the morning. Four in the morning! 

“Aw, does that mean we’re done?” Remus whined, yet he still began unmaking his small star system. 

Logan was suddenly very aware of the heaviness of his eyelids and a rubbery feeling in his limbs. God, was he tired. 

“I’m afraid so. I really should’ve gone to sleep hours ago.”

“Fine,” Remus dragged the word out with a groan, “But let me know next time you wanna fuck with space, or deep sea stuff, or anything like that.”

Next time. 

As much as Logan adored Roman, there was something very nice about having the more grim brother help him out with these experiments. For one, his creations were often much more accurate to the real world- likely because gore and destruction were that much more impactful when they were realistic. For two, he actually seemed to enjoy the work. 

Logan’s deliberation was brief. 

“I will.”

 As it happened, the night spent delving into dozens of ideas had purged Logan’s need to use The Imagination, for the time being. Clearly, Remus was not patient enough to wait for him.

He popped up, unannounced, in Logic’s room.

“Lo!!!”

The trait in question fell out of his office chair in a very undignified way. Not that there’s a particularly dignified way to fall out of a chair, but if there was, this definitely wouldn’t have been it. He ‘ate shit’, as the saying goes.

Out of pure embarrassment, Logan made no move to get off the floor.

“Hello, Remus,” he greeted, “How may I help you?”

The Duke laughed raucously, sprawling into the now-unoccupied chair and leaning over him. 

“You’re a riot, Dork,” then, added with glittering eyes, “Did you break anything?”

“No. Given that I am metaphysical, I’m not sure that I have bones.”

“I have bones!”

“Are they your bones?”

“They are bones and they are in my possession, yes.” 

Logan let the subject drop and repeated his first question. 

“Right, I forgot! I have an idea for an experiment!”

Logan thought that, despite his mild humiliation, it would probably benefit the conversation if he wasn’t lying on the ground, so he stopped doing that. Brushing mostly imaginary dust from his clothes, he shot Remus a bemused look.

“That’s nice. But I was asking you why you were here.”

The Duke’s face fell, almost imperceptibly.  

“I thought you’d wanna know, because of what you said last time. Isn’t this, like, a thing we do now? You know how shit works, and I know how to make that shit, and then you can tell me about it!” 

Oh. 

“Remember when you were talking about radiation the other day? You can’t just say stuff like that and then not expect me to want to try it out, so really this is on you. It’d be dumb not to let you in on it.”

Oh. 

He’d been listening to that rant? Moreover, he’d remembered it, and now had his own ideas and follow-up questions about it? 

Logan felt light-headed. 

“You’re probably too busy with work, huh? I guess my explosions don't have to be accurate, if you’re set on being boring,” Remus’ tone was nonchalant, but he was obviously lingering for attention. Logan then remembered that words are a thing, and people use them to communicate.

“No! I mean, yes- I mean, I’m not busy. I can join you, I- I’d like to, even,” the intelligent side heard a small voice in his head, his own miniature Virgil, screaming- what the fuck was that, get it together, Jesus, because he, despite what his fellow sides insisted, was absolutely nonfunctional when trying to form a friendship. 

Remus didn’t seem to notice or care much past his own cheer.

“Cool!” he, yet again, wasted no time in seizing Logan’s arm and yanking him away, “I wanted to see what would happen to animals and plants and stuff bunches of years after lots of radiation! Do you think they’d mutate? Get all twisted and fucked up so that they aren’t even recognizable as, say, a dog?”

Logan considered the question as he was led through the Mindpalace.

“Well, nothing would be able to live there at all. Additionally, anything within a little under a mile of the nuclear fallout- depending on a few variables- would be completely incinerated upon impact.”

“Like, flesh-melting incinerated?” 

“More like vaporized. The fireball would burn 10,000 times the heat of the sun.”

Remus went starry eyed, bringing them to a halt a mere five feet from the door. 

“I wanna see that,” he waved his hands around at their surroundings, “Can you do the white-out thing?” 

Logan, much less hesitant than last time, obliged. A small smile escaped him at the wondrous look on The Duke’s face. It was another form of expression he didn’t particularly care for, but containing his emoting was more trouble than it was worth by now. He couldn’t find it in him to care much either, for once. 

“Where do we start?” Remus prompted.

“You tell me. I will help you make it as accurate as possible, and provide any insight that you want, but it is your idea,” and he wanted to hear more about those ideas. Odd and violent, mesmerizing and clever. There was so much that he wanted to hear about, to talk about, to puzzle out together. 

Logan couldn’t remember the last time he’d had someone to share such interests with. Maybe, despite how deeply he cared for his ‘family’, as Patton called them- maybe it was never.

Remus chattered as he worked, disrupting the train of thought. Logan almost tuned it out- after all, everyone had grown perfectly used to The Duke’s rambling- but he caught himself. That was hardly how he should treat the side that was so strangely considerate to him, wasn’t it? 

Logan listened from then on. He began to add on to the conversation, corrections and elaborations and actual questions, because he actually didn’t know some of it. He didn’t regret the choice. 

By the end, Remus and Logan were sitting together in the smoldering ruins of their make-believe test town, exchanging notes for different variables they could use in the next trial. They only stopped when Logan was abruptly summoned away by Thomas. He excused himself, a bit apologetic, promising to visit again soon.

As he helped Thomas (with what really should have been a simple task, honestly), Logic wondered briefly about the origins of the hollow feeling that grew in his chest. Something distracted, longing, and unfamiliar. 

And then the oven caught fire, and the only thing he felt was annoyance with the man that he was somehow a component of. 

 So, that was that- Logan and Remus were friends, now spent regular time together, and shared interests. By all accounts, it was a simple and obviously positive development. 

But then there was Roman. 

“What’s wrong with my work? You’d really prefer whatever edgy 12-year-old DeviantArt account nonsense that he thinks up?”

Logan set his book down with a sigh and looked over to his doorway, where Roman stood with his hands on his hips.

“Come in, Roman, and thank you for knocking,” he snarked. The Creative side made a vaguely sassy noise, trotting right in and flopping backwards onto the bed. Without closing the door, the monster.

“I thought that building your Weird Science contraptions was our thing.”

Logan made a show of standing up and manually shutting his door before responding. 

“You don’t like my ‘contraptions’, as you call them.”

“Yeah, but I still made them for you! Because we’re friends, but I suppose you’ve forgotten all about that!” 

He really should have expected the melodrama. And yet, Logan had lived in a delusional world where he didn’t care about the most Extra being on earth.

With an eye roll, Logic dropped down beside Roman on the bed- though he wasn’t half as flamboyant about it. 

“I can have more than one friend.”

“Yeah, but I’m supposed to be your favorite! We’re supposed to hang out together! Do the friendship bracelets I made mean nothing to you?”

He flung his arm across Logan’s chest, a ‘friendship bracelet’ clearly visible on his wrist (a loose usage of the term, given that it was a solid gold band with inlaid sapphires, because of course it was).

Logan held up his arm as well, showing that his (silver with inlaid rubies) was still very much in use, despite his distaste for jewelry.

“We hang out plenty. It wasn’t my intention to hurt your feelings by spending time with your brother. My reason for doing so is that he seems to take active enjoyment in building and learning about these things with me. He also makes very good conversation, in regards to the more, ah, eccentric experiments.”

Roman tossed his head to the side to watch Logan with narrowed eyes. After a pause, he linked their arms at the elbow. 

“Yeah, you would think that. You’re secretly just as much of a weirdo as him.”

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

“Oh please, I can barely keep up with a word that either of you say,” Roman headbutted Logan’s shoulder in what was likely another of his odd displays of affection. He let his head rest there for a minute, a rare instance of peace before he inevitably resumed talking. 

“Anyways-”

“Anyway,” Logan corrected.

“Anyways, if you nerds wanna talk about your weird, creepy experiments, then I guess that’s fine. But he isn’t allowed to co-opt anything else that we do together that we both actually like- no making fun of movies together, no Crofters jams, and no poetry-slash-rap battles.”

“Of course not, Roman. You will always be my favorite person to disagree with.”

“Love you, too,” Creativity bumped him again, then sat up to stretch. Logan snorted a laugh and considered shoving Roman off the bed, watching as he raised his arms up and straightened his back. Before the trait had the chance, unfortunately, his friend was already standing. 

“Leaving already? Weren’t you just going on about spending time together?”

“Nah, that was all I wanted to yell at you about for now. I’ve gotta go help Pat with dinner.”

“Well, don’t let me keep you.”

“Thanks, I won’t.”

“I hate you.”

“Ditto.”

Halfway out the door, Roman threw a glance over his shoulder.

“Oh, and whatever you two end up doing, do not give me the details. Please.”

Okay, finally, that really was that. Friendship established, blessings given, the end. A simple symbiosis.

Logan was thinking about the practical uses of medieval torture devices? Remus. He wanted to see exactly how long it would take your average healthy adult to succumb to drowning? Remus. Logan wanted to just rant, about anything and everything, his brain moving a mile a minute? Remus. They spent an inordinate amount of time together. 

Occasionally, when he didn’t even have the energy to converse, he would sit down with a book in the commons when he knew Remus was there and let the trait’s never ending word-vomit wash over him. It was an odd sort of intimacy, but that fit within the theme of their dynamic. Like he said, simple symbiosis. 

And that was when the not-very-platonic fondness grew. And Logan, to his own surprise, allowed it to. 

After deep consideration he had seen no reason not to; Remus wouldn’t judge him, not ever. It put a name to the hollow longing that occurred whenever he, eventually, had to get back to work and part from their talks. 

He hadn’t sorted out what to do about the feeling yet, but he felt no urgency. 

Logan’s book lay forgotten in his lap, that morning being one of the quiet ones as he reflected on his unfamiliar emotions. It was almost nice, letting such affection curl up in his chest and settle there.

His contemplation was broken by a sharp jab to his shoulder.

“Are you listening to me?”

He tilted his head at Remus.

“Sorry, I got distracted.”

“What were you thinking about?” his eyes lit up, very obviously hoping for it to be something disgusting. Logan glanced away, given that he didn’t even like eye-contact in the best of circumstances. 

“Nothing important. You have my attention now.”

Remus rolled his eyes with a huff, apparently genuinely irritated. 

“Well now I forgot what I was saying.”

“Let’s backtrack: what were you talking about before?”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s fine, we can talk about something else.”

The irritation had grown to something unrecognizable to Logan- frustrating, given how closely he tried to study body language. He felt a stab of guilt as Remus stood up from his spot.

“It probably didn’t matter. I’m gonna go annoy Janus.”

“Oh,” Logan’s voice was small, “Alright, then.”

He was already gone.

That was… concerning. Not to mention bewildering; Remus didn’t just pass up opportunities to talk! He didn’t just leave, not even when he wasn’t wanted! Logan really hadn’t thought his zoning out would earn such a reaction. 

But he was far from perceptive about emotional problems. There was no way to know if it was anything to throw a fit over. For all he knew, it was just an off-day. He couldn’t always expect his friend to be rambunctious and energetic, even if that was a big part of his personality. 

The issue would likely resolve itself.

 The issue did not do that. It did the polar opposite, speeding from mildly concerning to downright frightening at a whiplash-inducing pace.

Remus barely asked questions and almost never offered insight, as he usually did when they spent time together. In fact, his contributions had become rare and unenthusiastic enough that he could have passed as neurotypical, however disturbing the thought was. And that was when they did end up spending time together, which was becoming less and less often, much to the dismay of one significantly smitten smart side.

Something was very clearly wrong with Remus. Not the demented, destructive, mildly endearing and unhinged sort of wrong. It was the wrong sort of wrong.

Logan was hesitant to confront him outright. After a couple weeks of careful consideration, a more subtle solution occurred to him, as he idly flipped through a very graphic murder-mystery late into the night. Something bloody, and awful, and very much Remus’ taste. He set the novel down, knowing full well that his friend would be wide awake as he made his way across the hall.

“Remus?” he knocked at the side’s door, wearing a smile much wider than he usually liked. He was more than willing to express exuberance, if there was even the slightest chance that it would be infectious.

The door decidedly did not fly open. Rather, after a good deal of wrapping at it, Remus slowly pulled it back and poked his head out.

“Oh. Hey.”

Logan didn't dwell on the concern that reaction brought. He had something that would cheer Creativity up, of that he was sure.

“I have a test tonight- it’s going to be very messy,” he began, searching the impulsive trait’s eyes for any signs of interest. There was the slightest glint, but not much more. 

“So, you want me to make stuff for you?” His speech was monotonous. 

“Yes, that was the idea. It’s going to be gory.”

Hardly a reaction. All Remus did was open the door the rest of the way to allow Logan inside. Clearly, he had underestimated just how poorly his friend felt.

“Alright, I’ll set it up for you. Just don’t take too long, I was actually hoping to use my part of the Mindscape today.”

Logan nodded, very taken aback. He couldn’t ignore the slight hurt at the cold, dismissive tone (the irony of that wasn’t lost on him).

They stepped foot into The Imagination and immediately Remus stopped, destroying whatever had been in front of them- which was usually fine, it was just how he operated, but normally out of enthusiasm, not apathy. Maybe this was more than could be fixed with some blood and guts.

“What do you need?”

Logan conjured a tiny notebook, giving a tentative smile. Still, he was giving this plan a shot.

“Operating table,” one appeared before him, sleek metal with rolly legs, “A standard set of surgical tools,” he looked up to gauge Remus’ interest, but his expression still hadn’t changed as he continued to create, “A human corpse, and then we can get started.”

With a wave, a perfectly generic body fell onto the table, but Logan’s attention remained on The Duke.

“Great, have fun, let me know when you’re finished.”

Logan faltered, watching him turn to leave.

“You- you aren’t going to stay and do this with me?”

“You want me to?” Remus crossed his arms over his chest and fixed Logan with a gaze that could (figuratively) wilt flowers.

“I- Yes? If you aren’t at all interested right now, then I can save this experiment for another day?” Yeah, this wasn’t working, but Logan had no backup.

“No, no, don’t wait for me, you’ve already got everything you need, right?”

“I mean- technically, yes, but it- it wouldn’t be the same.”

Remus cackled, sounding quite like the cartoonish villain that he often acted as. It hurt to listen to.

“So that’s what this is about! Let me just fix you up, then!” 

He snapped, and a blank humanoid form appeared at his side. It tilted its faceless head curiously at Logan, who recoiled.

“Not good enough? Is a hunk of nothing too unrealistic for you?” he snapped again, and the being suddenly transformed to match its creator exactly. 

Nearly exactly: it wore an enthusiastic grin, eyes wide and sparkling, rather than the steadily building fire that raged in real-Remus’ eyes. It spoke in a disgustingly cheery tone.

“Wow, tell me more! Show me that again? What happens when you do that? You’re just so interesting, Lo!” 

Remus watched the creation, a look of one part pride and a million parts resentment.

“Is that what you want? It’s just like me, but without any of the hassle of being another person that you have to deal with! And this one, you really can get rid of whenever you want, isn’t that great?”

Logan looked between the two, a fearful understanding creeping up his spine. There was something he was missing here, wasn’t there?

“No,” he muttered, half to the fake-Duke and half to the real one. 

“No?” Remus spat, circling his mirror, “No, of course, you’re so right. This isn’t nearly enough.”

He made an elaborate gesture, and about a dozen more Creativities appeared, surrounding them. Logan stumbled back from them, nearly tripping on the operating table that they’d previously made. When he looked up, the real Remus was approaching him with an expression that fought its way between guilt and indignation. It was all at once heart-wrenching and frightening. 

Logan tried to right himself, tried to look unaffected and certain of himself, as he raised his voice. He would not let this go a step farther, despite his confusion.

“Stop,” and with that, a wave rocked across The Imagination, and all was erased. In the aftermath he stood before a teary-eyed Remus (just the one, though), uncharacteristically looking like a stiff wind would knock him right over.

“What’s wrong? I gave you what you wanted!”

Logan reeled.

“Why would you think I wanted any of that?” 

“You wanted an experiment, I gave you one! You wanted a willing audience, I gave you twelve! But I guess I just get everything wrong, right?”

“You know that isn’t true,” Logan felt choked, his words clumsy. It was foreign and horrible and disgusting, but he’d trudge through it all if it meant fixing whatever he’d done wrong. It couldn’t have just been him losing focus once? Could it? 

“Oh, of course, I do just enough to be useful. So I’ve got that right; I’m a good utensil. Is it so much to ask that people would care about me, not just what I can do?” he posed a rhetorical oozing with vitriol, but it quickly evaporated into something much more desperate, “What if it’s my fault? It was my idea, I wanted to help. I don’t know why I thought you’d care past all that, did I give you a reason to? I can’t remember. It might make more sense that way, if I were the problem, wouldn’t it?”

Logan was running out of time to fix this, watching Remus curl in on himself, barely keeping from falling to the floor. He had no clue how The Duke had reached the conclusion that he didn’t care about him! They spent nearly all their free time together: sitting next to each other just to have the company, throwing each other tricky and often troubling questions to answer, constantly toiling away at things in The Imagination. Sometimes, they didn’t even need to talk, they just worked together in rapt silence; Remus did the creating and Logan arranged his work just so, and- Wait. Wait. Wait.

Logan didn’t need to talk, or touch, for that matter. Perhaps it was a mistake to presume the same for such a needy, affectionate, boisterous side? 

No, not perhaps, it was a huge mistake. A major fuck-up, if you will. 

He’d thought, if the blunt side had needed such comforts, surely he would initiate it? He hardly shied away from anything, except, well. 

Except. Feelings. 

God, he was the dumbest smart person in the world.

“Oh, Remus…”

The Duke’s head jerked up, continuing his back-and-forth of desperation and rage. 

“I don't need your pity!”

Logan sighed, twisting the end of his tie in frustration. 

“That isn't what I'm offering,” he took a breath before continuing, linking the words together so it would come out right. “I'm so sorry, I didn't take into account how you would interpret our interactions. I thought it was obvious that I cared for you, that I didn't need to say it outright. Clearly… I was wrong. So, if you need more than what I previously expressed- which I'm now realizing was very little in the eyes of someone who is not me- then I am happy to provide that for you.” 

Remus was shaken, a good deal of his ire slipping away. Whether that was good or bad remained unclear.

Before it could be overthought, Logan crossed the remaining few feet between them and brought his arms around The Duke in his loose approximation of a hug. The trait froze, but he didn't pull away. 

Physical affection, check. 

“I value your companionship more than I'm entirely sure how to verbalize. You understand me in a way that most others don’t seem to. While your ability to make detailed creations is very helpful, it is hardly the only thing I appreciate about you. 

“For one, you make me laugh. A lot. More than I'm used to. Additionally, you can easily match the pace with which I speak, or change topics! And, you are so much smarter than you make yourself out to be,” Logan finished the spiel with a smile, genuinely proud at his ability to articulate such… sentimental things, with relative ease. Words of affirmation, check.

He snapped back to attention when Remus brought shaking hands up to Logan's chest. For a moment, he worried that Remus would shove him away. The fears dissipated when all he did was bunch the front of Logan's shirt in his hands and hold on tight. 

“Do you mean that,” his volume was low, “Or do you just want me to calm down?”

Logan tightened his grip around him and, following a motion that he'd seen Patton employ many times to great success, he rubbed up and down his back.

“I understand that it might be hard for you to trust me, but I promise I'm not lying to you. I would have to be pretty awful to do something like that, wouldn't I?”

Hesitantly, Remus nodded against his collar. A good sign, but there was one thing left he had to say. 

“And- If you need further convincing- then you should know. I love you.”

Remus stilled. He then unfisted his hands from Logan's shirt. It was an anticipatory second before he threw his arms around the logical trait and finally returned the hug. His hold was crushing, and it was the most comforting thing that Logan had ever felt. 

They were okay.

“I'm sorry I-” 

Logan didn’t let him finish the apology. 

“Don't be. You didn't know how I felt, because I hadn't communicated it in a way you understood. That is hardly your fault.”

Remus nodded again, remaining much quieter than he’d probably ever been in his entire existence.

They held each other for longer than either would like to admit, speaking softly. 

“Thanks,” was muttered against Logan’s shoulder. 

“Of course. Just so you know, I'm more than willing to do this again whenever you need reassurance.”

“It might be a lot,” his tone was turning more mischievous, more him, “Are you sure you can handle that?”

“Absolutely.”

Logan hardly minded having an opportunity to gush about Remus to Remus. Not to mention, the physical affection was even nicer than he'd imagined it being. And oh, had he imagined it. 

Remus' face returned to his usual ever-present zeal, and he ended their hug to bounce in place. 

“Great! I'm good now! We can get on with that autopsy you wanted to show me- there better be buckets of blood!”

Logan shifted his weight. 

“Maybe we should save that for another day.”

“Oh,” Remus' face fell the smallest bit, “Okay.”

Logan was quick to amend:

“By that I mean, I have something better in mind.”

 Remus curled himself up in Logan’s lap, his eyes barely focused on the TV as the side carded his hands through his tangled mop of hair. Final Destination 3 played on the television (he had assured Logan that they didn't need to see the first two, and he was mostly right), serving as an excuse for the two to drink in each other's company. 

It was right in the middle of a particularly graphic rollercoaster scene that Remus took Logan's hands from his hair to hold them, twisting around to face him.

“Is something wrong, Remus?”

“You told me you loved me,” he stated blankly. 

“Yes, I did.”

“I didn't say it back!”

“No, you didn't,” it hadn't been the most important matter at the time, really. “You don't have to say it. It's perfectly okay if you don't feel the s- Mmph!”

Remus smashed their lips together, holding the sides of Logan's face (disrupting his glasses in the process) and pulling him forward harshly. 

Logan, for less than a second, was floored. And then Remus tilted his head to deepen the already heated kiss, and the situation properly clicked. Logan reciprocated, slightly uncertain in his movements, wrapping his arms around the other’s waist. 

Remus smiled against him. He nipped at Logan's lower lip with sharpened teeth, eliciting a very embarrassing yelp. Logic let his lips part in response as his thoughts grew fuzzier by the second. 

The (somewhat clumsy) open-mouthed kiss lasted right until they absolutely had to break, separating for air. Neither moved very far, letting their foreheads rest against each other and all but panting for breath.

“I love you so fuckin' much, nerd,” when Remus spoke, their lips brushed ever so slightly, “Just so you know.”

“I picked up on that, yes.” 

“A little clarity never hurts, right?”

Logan chuckled at the reference to his own sentiments, but the sound was abruptly cut off when Remus kissed him properly again. 

When they broke apart, he explained how 'stupid-cute' that laugh was. And Logan, only half-joking (since when did he joke at all?), said that he’d have to do it more often.

Banter came easily to them, despite the raw undercurrent that still laced their conversation. Although, neither of them had ever found it difficult to talk; talk about the first thing that came to mind and the last thing that would come to anyone’s mind, talk about exceedingly simple nonsense and topics so intricate that they wound up sounding like nonsense, just talk.

So things would stay mostly the same. They would ramble to each other when no one else could stand to hear such disturbing things. They would sit, working side by side, running through plans and ideas and results at rapid-paced speech. They’d speak, and they would listen, when even their closest friends couldn’t manage such patience.

Only now, sometimes the rushed words might turn soft. Now, all that ranting might be more substantial than anyone would at first see. Now, they’d still listen, but leaned close together, gazes impossibly fond.

But then, on occasion, they would find that there were things far more fun than talking to do together.

@shrimp-crockpot

[fuckyeahsuperheropowercouples]

The most irritating thing about Tumblr HP

You know what I’m tired of?? I really TRIED to stay quiet but it’s gotten on my nerves and I’m at my breaking point. You know that general rule that if you do not like a pairing/art involving them being romantic/intimate, don’t reblog/like the post and simply block and walk your dumbass out the door. A shame Harry Potter fandom can’t learn to fuck off! Most prominent example: idiot shippers who comment stupid shit to justify how they view harmony on a Harry/Hermione ship art POST! Most common example I found was on one of @arishatistic ‘s posts, where about a few dozen dumbfucks composed of romiones/drarries/hinnies/dramiones that came over there in the comments and reblogged a harry/Hermione art piece by a HARMONY SHIPPER(referring to dear sweet arishatistic, ofc) and start rambling their nonsense about ‘my brotp!’ or ‘need more platonic Harry/Hermione🥺’ like, bitch are you high!??? That account belongs to a Harmione shipper and majority of the stuff is harryxhermione related! So A)fuck you, B)don’t ship them, don’t follow or actually bother t CHECK to make sure they are not a Harmione shipper(basic common sense that even a 8 year old can figure out but who am I kidding?? You’re a hp fanatic on tumblr, not a big surprise) C) as if your pairings aren’t the most problematic shit to exist(oops! I went there, don’t regret😎) and finally D) even if you reblog and praise the art, it’s still DISRESPECTFUL of you to put in your shitty tags stuff like: #brotp #i don’t ship them #friendshipsgoals . Like, motherfucker, are you this stupid???? This is a fandom where fanart does NOT.FOLLOW.YOUR.DUMBASS.CANON!! If you are so passionate about being an annoying bitch and spreading your shitty ass opinion as a global fact, here’s an advice: DON’T REBLOG FROM THE SHIP/SHIPPER YOU CLEARLY DISPISE! Do THEY go around trashing your garbage ships!??? I don’t fucking think so. And cry me a fucking river. Blacklist the tags of ships you hate and even better: just go all out(like I do most of time on this hellhole site) and track/block every ship/shipper blog you clearly despise. And one more thing you imbeciles: put an ANTI on the ships you hate tags so it’s blacklisted on us shippers who ship them and doesn’t show up on our normal ship name tag!! I’m sorry for the long rant. It is shocking isn’t, how stubborn and foolish these people are? They have nothing more productive to do than this crap. You might wonder why I give a shit(someone who’s clearly into other fandom:marvel/dc)? Simple. Because, yes, I have a soft spot for Harmione(yeah, unpopular opinion, no shit), and I’m tired of seeing this common practice occurring when I search for something I ENJOY. It’s the the same for my other ships from other fandoms. But I have reached my limits. If I have to be deemed a enemy for simplying stating this stupidity and for not supporting popular ships, so be it. I rather have less followers and post/like/reblog things that I enjoy than have more followers but be obliged to post things for others enjoyment and not my own. That’s all I will say for now (PS: there will likely be same rants like this again if this continues because let’s be honest, potterheads never learn, lmao. It’s why I distanced myself a long time ago. ALSO, any Romione/Drarry/Dramione and Hinny shipper who reads this, do not reblog my shit. Or try to talk with me about being too harsh. Just look at yourself in the mirror and you will see who the real toxic asshole is. And if there are any sane ones out there, respectively ignore this. It’s not meant for you. Also, PAY FUCKING ATTENTION TO MY TAGS). You wanna block me? Pfff, lol. I don’t give damn. Get out! Because I have done the same to those who done this practice. If my opinion butthurts your sensitive ass, you are welcome to leave. Don’t reblog my crap!

[lilachaeyo]

Staying in the Shadows (A Naruto Fanfic) Chapter 4 - Dropping Out.

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 (Part I) Chapter 3 (Part II)

"Two Ichiraku Special, please," Jinko ordered as both her and Mitsuki sat at a table.

"Ichiraku ramen is the best ramen in the world!" Jinko looked at Mitsuki. The room smelled of spices and filled with customers chatting amongst themselves. The place had been redecorated. It was much larger than Jinko remembered. Jinko couldn't recognise it.

"Here you go!" A waiter placed their food. Both of them said their prayers and dug in. Mitsuki was gulping the noodles. His eyes were wide, amazed at the taste. Jinko chuckled at him. Mitsuki finished his bowl when Jinko's bowl was half. "Do you want some more?" she asked. Mitsuki shook his head. Mitsuki wanted to ask her about her past but was not sure how to bring up the subject. Jinko knew something was on Mitsuki's mind but she let it slide. He will tell her when he wants to.

"Uh, Jinko," Mitsuki interrupted in between her bite.

"Hm?" she asked.

"How come you never told me that you're from Konoha?"

She swallowed her morsel before replying, "Never came up. Didn't think it was important." It wasn't just that. She didn't want to bring up the subject as she didn't want to remember those days. Only few people knew of it, most of them were dead. Orochimaru knew some of it, but not everything.

"Well I'm bringing it up. Could please tell me?"

Jinko sighed. "I'm from Tao clan, which is a small but a proud clan of the Konoha. I grew up here, went to the academy and became a genin."

"What happened after that?" Mitsuki asked. He was curious about her past life. She was from Konoha meaning she might know some of the people here. What if she knew Naruto Uzumaki? The thought wasn't very far from his mind.

"Something came up and I had to dropout from the programme," she answered looking down. Mitsuki couldn't believe his ears. Dropping out of the programme? How can she quit? What was so important to give up being a shinobi?

"Why!" he exclaimed.

"It's a story for some other time. Nothing special. I don't want you to dwell on these trivial details," Jinko shook him off. "Now if you are done, we should leave and find ourselves a hotel to rest. I don't know about you but I'm pretty beat."

Jinko paid the bill before standing up and leaving the hotel with Mitsuki on toll.

After an hour of searching, Jinko and Mitsuki finally settled in a two room suite, which wasn't too hard on their budget. After making sure that Mitsuki was asleep, Jinko slid into her own bed. The streets seemed silent. It must be around midnight, she thought. Although she was tired Jinko couldn't make herself to go to sleep. Her mind kept going back to her past.

It had been months since formation of the Team 7. The missions assigned to them where only D-ranked. Naruto was becoming a nag, always complaining how bored he was with these mission and how he was ready for some serious ones. Tch, baka.

Ever since the bell test Jinko knew she was the weakest amongst them and she had to train extra hard for her to be of any use. She got up every morning and practiced her punches and shuriken throwing skills. She meditated before going to bed to increase her chakra control. She even asked Isao, her older brother to spar with her but he was too busy. Teme, if he ever comes to me asking for help, she thought grudgingly. These D-rank missions were easy as it didn't require any Ninjutsu or any other skills for that matter but she knew the day wasn't far away that she might have to go on a C-rank or B-rank missions.

Team 7 was in the Hokage's office for their new mission. "I don't want any of these baby missions. I want some real mission," Naruto yelled.

"How dare you! You're only freshly graduated genin and you are going to do missions D-ranked only, just like everybody else!" Iruka sensei yelled back.

"Naruto, listen to me," the Third said calmly. "Different people come to our village for missions and then we analyse them and categorize them into A, B..."  Lord Hokage was explaining how the village works but Naruto, Kakashi, Sasuke, Jinko and Sakura all zoned out and started listening to Naruto who was talking about ramen. "So I had this Tatsu ramen yesterday and I think I need Miso ramen today—"

"Silence!" Hokage silenced him. They directed their attention to him now.

"Ah! You always lecture me as if you're my grandfather or something! But I'm not the brat who pulled pranks all the time. I'm a ninja now and I want some ninja mission!" Naruto puffed his cheeks out and turned his back to lord Hokage.

Both Iruka and the Third laughed at his antics. "Alright. Since Naruto wants us to know that he is a former brat and want some ninja mission. So be it. I will assign you all one since you are so determined." This piqued Naruto's interest and he turned to the Hokage again.

"I'm giving you a C- rank mission. You are going to be the body guards of our client."

"Really? Who? Is it some feudal lord? Or a princess?" Naruto began rambling. Everyone was excited for the higher level mission but Jinko was sweating bullets. She knew this day was coming but never thought this early. Damn you, Naruto! she thought. She wasn't ready yet. D- rank missions were easy and nobody really understood each other's capabilities. But C- rank mission will be different. They would need to use their skills and talent. What if they laugh at Jinko for being so weak?

The door of the office was opened and in stepped a drunk old man. "What? A bunch of snot nosed kids," he slurred. "And you, the little one with an idiotic look on your face."

"Who's with the idiotic look on the face?" Naruto laughed. Everyone stepped closer to Naruto and he understood that it was him. "I'll demolish you!" He started flailing his punches around in the air.

Kakashi hold him back, "You can't demolish the client Naruto!"

"Now if you leave the room, I have some important matter to discuss with Jinko," the Third voiced over all the ruckus. Jinko looked at the Hokage, "Huh, me?"

"Yes." Everyone left the room and Jinko was now facing Iruka sensei and the Hokage. He put his elbows on the table and intertwined his fingers. He looked gravely at Jinko, almost like he knew whatever he wanted say wouldn't settle with her. He pitied her. Jinko was scared. Her mind overworking her imagination. Was someone dead? Is it Isao? No that can't be I saw him leave today. Who then? I'm I in trouble? Is it because of my performance? Jinko kept searching the ground as if it had answers.

"Jinko, your parents and I had a meeting this morning about your future. They had a peculiar request," he said, finally breaking the silence.

"A request?" Jinko's eyebrows creased.

"They came here for your unenrolment from the programme."

Unenrolment? "What do you mean?" Jinko asked incredulously.

The Hokage sighed. "They don't want you to continue being a shinobi. They want you to drop out," he said grievously.

"But why?" Jinko exclaimed. Outside the door, her team and Tazuna was interrupted in their argument by her loud, distressed voice.

"That you are going to have to discuss it with your family, my dear," the old man replied. His voice laced with sorrow for the girl. Jinko's eyes filled with tears, looking pleadingly at him to help her out. Her face flushed and a knot was forming in her stomach. Why would they do this? She thought many reasons as to what made her parents to take this step. Never in her wildest imagination she would have guessed the actual reason which would be released to her later that day.

"That's all, my child. There's nothing I can do here. If your parents change their mind then you can rejoin your team but till then I must strictly ask you to not participate in any kind of missions with your comrades."

Jinko couldn't hold it any longer. As soon as the Hokage was finished, she slammed opened the door and darted past her fellow comrades. She had her arm around her eyes to hide her tears but she couldn't help the sob that left her lips. Everyone outside were surprised by the sudden loud sound of the door slamming against the wall. Their faces were of confusion and concern for their teammate who passed by them sobbing. Even Sasuke was taken aback. "Hey Jinko! What's the matter? Where you going?" Naruto tried to stop her but his voice didn't reach her ears. He was about to run after her but Kakashi stopped him. "We have a mission to worry about," he told him, knowing full well of the conversation that was held inside. The Hokage broke the news to him just after Jinko's parents left. Naruto couldn't argue with him. Kakashi was right. I would ask her on our way to the Land of Waves, he thought.

"Mother!" Jinko yelled as she barged inside her house. "Mother! Father!"

"What is it Jinko? Should a lady be yelling this loud?" her mother chastised her as she came out into the living room.

"Mother what is this nonsense about you asking me to drop out?" Jinko asked wiping away her tears and fixing her attire.

"Yes. Your father and I need to talk with you," her mother replied calmly. "But before that, go and clean yourself. I will not have you in my house looking this filthy!"

Jinko went to her room and changed into her yukata. After tidying herself, she went downstairs in the living room. Jinko sat in front of her parent in a seiza, with her head bowed down. Her father, the head of the Tao clan, cleared his throat. "Jinko, my dear, you know how the Tao clan works, correct? We may be small but we are a proud clan. We are not powerful like the Uchihas, or have renowned kekkei genkai like the Hyugas, but we have connections. Connections which make us stronger, perhaps even more than the Uchihas. We maintain these connections by having good relations.

"And these good relations are because of mutual respect and a little give and take. Some times they make requests and we have to abide them, if we don't there will be consequences. Consequences which harm our clan's reputation. The same goes for them, dear—"

"But what does that have to do with me dropping out?" Jinko cut him off. "Quiet! Shouldn't you know better than to interrupt your father!" Jinko's mother shushed her. Jinko looked down at her hands clutching her yukata.

"As I was saying, a request has been made by the Eguchi clan from the Land of Silk. A request which involves you. The son of the feudal lord, heir of the Eguchi clan and you are arranged to be married." Jinko's father finished. There was silence in the room. Jinko sat transfixed, clutching her yukata. Her eyes flickered with shock. Married? He is not serious. He can't be!

"But why?" Jinko wailed. "Why me? I don't want to marry!"

"The Eguchi clan and Tao clan are bounded together by our common perspectives and our respect to our ancient principles and our traditions. They wanted a daughter in-law from a family with such beliefs. No better than the daughter of the Tao clan, don't you think?" her father explained. His face showed no emotion. He was unfazed by his daughters tears, which were now running down her cheeks.

"Now," her mother started this time. She looked almost bursting with joy to tell her further news. "They wanted a lady, one who could bear them their heirs and not a shinobi. That is why you will be dropping out of the programme and stay at home. I will teach you all the things that an ideal and perfect housewife needs to know. You'll be a real lady in no time." She smiled at her proud. Her mother got up and walked around the table. She bent down and hugged Jinko with her thin arms. She then proceeded to kiss Jinko's wet cheeks, all the while Jinko was motionless. Her mother then got up from her position and left with her father, both talking about being fortunate to receive such a proposal. Neither of them paying heed to Jinko.

A tear slipped from Jinko's eye as she remembered the day which turned her world upside down. She quickly wiped it away and shut her eyes to get some sleep, but orange light shimmered through her windows and fell upon her bed. The birds started chirping and the swishing of the brooms sweeping the road was heard. Well, might as well arrange breakfast before Mitsuki wakes up, she thought. Jinko stretched as she stepped out of her bed and started her day.

[mistabullets]

Whole nsfw alphabet with mista? Huehue

Not SFW under cut ;

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex) 

You can trust Mista to pamper you during aftercare. He’s always wanting to hold you tight before he slips out and then continue cuddling even more. You’re probably the one who has to drag him to take a shower. But sometimes, you let him get away and just drift off to sleep.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) 

He thinks he has a nice stomach and abs. He loves it when his partner trails their hand all over his tummy, since it’s slightly ticklish. Mista loves your ass and finds his eyes constantly gazing at them; sometimes he’ll even give it playful slap when the mood is right. 

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person) 

He’s the type of dude that loves to cum wherever. He’ll cum inside of you but sometimes, it’s nice to cover your body with his jizz. Mista especially likes to cum on your thighs and stomach and make a mess out of you. And sometimes, he’s the type of dude who will cum in your mouth. 

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) 

He has definitely stolen some of your underwear and enjoys sniffing them and using it to masturbate. He has a fantasy where he wants to fuck you in public and stuff your mouth with sullied panties to muffle your moans. 

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Mista has had sex with a few people before and has a good idea of what he is doing, in regards to good ol’ vanilla sex. However, if you were ask him about kinks, he would probably shrug his head... if you wanted to try something a bit more risky, he may ask Bruno or Abba about it. 

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

 Any position where he can admire your ass but still be intimate. There’s the boat, the spoon, 

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc) 

Mista can laugh at himself during sex and be goofy. He might ramble about something nonsensical to keep himself from getting nervous but usually you end up giggling him. You’ll pull him in a kiss and tell him to “shut up and fuck me” and you’ll both just laugh.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.) 

He tries to keep it a bit trimmed up but he’s lazy and don’t think his partner will care since they don’t shave either. Black, coarse pubic hair, quite curly. 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Mista is sweet boy! He is so doting and loving during the moment, always remarking how beautiful you are and how good you make him feel. Constantly has his lips on you and grunting out sweet nothings. 

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon) 

Mista is always horny, so he’s going to masturbate at least once day, in the shower, usually thinking about his partner. 

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks) 

He’ll try about everything once. But he absolutely loves rough sex, roleplay (albeit, something cheesy), and sensation play (blindfolding you, putting food on your body, etc). Also, he loves pegging or anal sex with amab partner.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do) 

Usually at home but sometimes, he may be feeling a bit frisky. Will probably take you out to dinner or a bar, get horny, and ask if you want to fuck in a bathroom or some secluded area outside. 

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going) 

Usually, if you incite him with something, in exchange for something else, he’s down. “Hey Guido, if you clean up the kitchen, you can get a blowjob!” and he’ll have that kitchen clean in no time. Also, an accidental and intentional glimpse of your ass, boobs, bra, panties, etc.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) 

He’s the type of person to keep his love life away from his mafia job, and would rather not bring aspects of his job to the bedroom. So expect him to keep his gun away during sex. He would be too worried about hurting you. 

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc) 

Loves, loves, loves receiving! He will be moaning your name and holding a fistfull of your hair. But he’ll also go down on you and knows how to make you moan. (;

P = Pace (Are they fats and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.) 

Depends on the mood, but he usually likes to start out sensual. But whenever both of your orgasms are approaching, he’ll pick up the pace and brutally fuck you.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Mista is down to do a quickie sometimes, especially when he has to head to work in the morning. It’s a great way to start his day. And it great way to tease you and be ready the evening after. 

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.) 

Mista is willing to take risk, such as fucking you somewhere semi-public and potentially risk being caught. Also is a man who will try everything once, as long both of you are comfortable.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…) 

He can go for two or three on a typical day or five rounds when he’s really desperate and hasn’t seen you. But never four.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He has toys for both him and for you to use. Mista is a bit of switch; he has a cockring and a strap on for his afab partner to use on him when he’s in the mood for getting dominated and pegged. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) 

He really likes to tease you if you’re all riled up. Will call you his troia perfetta. When he’s going down on you, he will definitely take advantage of your lewd state, particularly stopping just when you’re about ready to cum. 

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make) 

Mista is loud! He’s moaning and grunting your name, and he always sounds desperate and needy. You think it’s cute and sexy. 

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Mista is a switch. He loves teasing his partner until they’re begging but he also likes to be the one, begging to be fucked. Likes when his partner rides him on top and fucks him in the ass with a strap on. 

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words) 

Mista has a happy trail. His dick is a good 6 inches with a thick girth to it, at about 7 inches with a slight curve. Uncircumcised with a slightly red head. 

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?) 

Sex drive is relatively normal, slightly higher compare to others. Sure, he’ll admire and compliment your body and masturbate once day, but sex shouldn’t be a daily routine. Usually fucks like three or two times a week. 

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He’s a sleepy boy. Unless you manage to convince him to take a shower, he’s probably going to fall asleep once he’s got himself in a perfect cuddling position. But he might wake up and see about another round. 

[yaz-the-spaz]

Listen your long answers are the best bc I really be thinking too! And omg I also was thinking like, does she have that disease or?? I know almost nothing about her but then the entertainment industry lies about every little thing that u just never know what's true! The mom seems super calculated and khris kardashian wanna be I just know she was the "family friend" source for tmz.

awww haha thanks so much nonnie, i’m always so glad to hear that at least a small few ppl on here enjoy my rambly nonsense lol! 😊 putting the rest under the cut again for reasons (please let this work @tumblr gods lol)

and yeah on the disease - honestly who knows. it’s highly sus to me that the news of her having the disease came directly after all the talk of her fluctuating weight and rumors/speculation that it was b/c she was on drugs (which lbr most celebs probably are/have been at some point, even the seemingly ‘innocent’ ones, and ESPECIALLY models who are under so much pressure to keep their weight down and cocaine is a very easy way to do that and extremely easily accessible in the modeling world) so like...could have been a very convenient cover up for her drastic weight change, or she could actually have the disease (or maybe even both, who knows). but if she does have the disease that, again, just adds so many more weird inconsistencies with this pregnancy that just don’t make sense with her current behavior or with her supposed relationship history...like the fact that if she really wanted to conceive right now for whatever weird reason, she likely would have had to plan months ahead and do a lot of prep to make sure it actually happened with the disease...which doesn’t make sense with the narrative that she and z got back together in december cause hypothetically she would have had to get pregnant immediately, like as soon as she ‘got back’ with him. so are we to believe that she was just lucky in that she ‘happened’ to get pregnant by him right away after they ‘got back together’ w/o all the necessary prep and pre-planning? i mean sure it’s possible hypothetically speaking ofc, but obviously since i don’t believe they’re in a real relationship or that he would ever actually sleep with her lol it’s not a realistic possibility imo. then there’s the fact that she’s traveling all the way to his house to take pics, walking all over her farm, riding horses, and drinking wine and coffee, and barely showing, almost all things that things you should not be doing at 5 months pregnant or that don’t add up with a 5 month along pregnancy, and that’s just a regular pregnancy. add into that the fact that if she does really have the disease this should very likely be considered a high-risk one, that would mean realistically she should probably very likely be on bed rest at this stage or at the very least not traveling anywhere and not moving around too much/doing too much strenuous activities (like fucking horse riding wtf). so yeah there is A LOT that is very sus about this whole thing. and it feels to me like her family (and also the annoying ass g stans and het zstans) are just conveniently forgetting/ignoring all the other things that should potentially be at play here if she does have the disease--or even if she doesn’t--and are just expecting us to swallow it all with no questions and it’s extremely frustrating tbh

and also you are absolutely right, y*landa is literally SUCH a kris kardashian wannabe and given that the whole *all of my daughters are pregnant at the same time what an amazing coincidence* thing was widely rumored in certain circles to be a huge marketing ploy/attention grab that kris heavily coerced her daughters into (and was trying to push them to do for literal years until she finally got it to happen), this current pregnancy ploy with g seems like a move DIRECTLY out of the kris kardashian playbook tbh and i am quite certain as well that she was the mysterious ‘source’