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#bc she thinks i got scammed
uygfiug · 2 months
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hi anna!!! for the ask game: 18 & 25 :)
hiya zip :)
18. do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens? i dont not believe in them, they could exist, they could also not exist, with the size of the universe there definitely is space for aliens, but life was such a coincidence here that idk
and ghosts, theres no way to know what happens after death. back in primary school we all believed the school was haunted though :) i think thats just bc it was literally a few containers stacked together
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kind of like this, but crappier, so things malfunctioned a lot, and there was a bit of space under the school that cats ran around in, so there was a lot of weird movement & noises & the walls were so thin you could hear people piss very very clearly :(( if you happened to be in the classroom next to the toilet, so you just heard a lot
25. fave season and why? spring! i like how alive everything is, many animals are trying to mate, so theyre being very loud & out there, the plants are blooming & everything is so so green. and its right after winter, which makes it even more awesome how alive everything is, its not too hot, but not too cold either :)
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saulbaby · 2 years
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I love how Bob said that the difference between Jimmy and Saul wasn't conning and fast talking. That's all Jimmy, he says, he's been doing that since he was a kid. The difference is that Saul is when he became completely aware of all the consequences and decided not to care.
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judesstfrancis · 2 years
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no fucking way I just found the diamond select crow statue my mom and I have been looking at for YEARS for 46 dollars down from 160 on walmart dot com
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radioconstructed · 1 year
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⌖ In OTHER NEWS, fellow V*xtuber SCAMBAITER’S REVENGE got into some COUYON SCAMMER’S computer and made the scammer’s V*xtube account SUBSCRIBE TO MY CHANNEL -- before NUKING his entire operating system! A LEGEND! SIR! You have WHAT’S LEFT OF MY HEART!
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s-ccaam-era-crepe · 28 days
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the gall of some people- wait what’s a better word for gall I don’t like that one
#camera talks#sorry ANWYAYS. the Audacity of my coworker rn I’m like. actually laughing at her in my brain#I’m sorry but ‘I just feel like you aren’t helping out during the morning as much as I need you to be scam’#and ‘idk what you were doing the first 45 mins but when I asked you to help out and you kept doing sandwiches’#okay first off I set up Everything by myself this morning. coffee station. 3 tables. bread station. yogurts. fruit salad. the buffet#etc#half of which was supposed to be done last night but no one did itttt#secondly I told her ‘yeah let me finish this one sandwich and I’ll help out. because I already had sandwich gloves on so I wanted to finish#and gahhh it’s just so annoying. girl I did so fucking much this morning#breakfast wouldn’t be out without literally everything I did and youre asking me ‘oooh scam can I have some more help-#bc I don’t feel like you’re helping enough’ fuck off#she also mentioned she feels like I can’t hear her with one earbud in and Fuck That. I am not giving up my music at 6 in the morning#that’s the Only thing keeping me from kms on the commute so fuckkkk you#god whatever this probably seems super irrational but I’m just pissed that the assistant cook who gets paid way more than me#gets to ask me to do her job for her but I Cannot ask her to do dishes god Forbid#sorry guys I woke up at 4:30 and had to drive by 5:30 can you tell I got shitty sleep#also I have a dentist tomorrow Again and I don’t think that’s helping my emotions rn but alas. I’m at work so I can’t make a panic post#about the dentist Now that will have to wait#also no I’m not done yet cuz#also like yeah I’m aware this is real life adult shit that I’ll have to deal (shitty coworkers)#but it still sucks like. if I can think through my words and stuff to her and I’m ND and told I’m bad at social situations#(I don’t beleive that necessarily but no one cares so whatever)#then she can think about it and come to a reasonable thought as well and it just makes me upset#rahhh
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greenedgoddess · 4 months
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😑
#ughhh I sold these leather shoes from my mom and I think they’re vintage so they obviously weren’t in perfect condition#I honestly don’t even know where my mom got them#maybe she thrifted them but they don’t suite me so I was going to sell them on Facebook marketplace and some lady really wanted them#she was kind of weird messaging and super eager and then no message and then I texted checking in and she wanted them#she came way later than she said she would and she kept trying to get me to discount them for her#and I was like ugh no I listed them for a specific price#she finally comes and doesn’t even come to the correct address I’m waiting out for her for several minutes asking where she is bc#she expects me to come to her car or something wtf#finally she gets out and she tries on the shoes and likes them and decides to take them#she’s making a lot of conversation and seems nice and friendly I end up giving her a $5 discount bc she asks AGAIN#then today out of nowhere she’s texting my that the shoes are broken and I scammed her and shame on me#that apparently it will cost her the same amount I sold them to her to get them fixed#idk why it feels like I’m being hustled so I’m not going to message back or interact#like yeah the shoes weren’t brand new that’s why they weren’t listed for super expensive but they weren’t broken#and then she says it will cost the same amount to fix as she sold them to me for#okay lady why would it cost the EXACT same amount#I didn’t even sell them to her for that much so I know a shoe repair would likely charge more for whatever issue she’s claiming#I’m tired of Facebook marketplace
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beom-pyu · 1 year
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i can't swim, idiot ☆⋆。𖦹°‧★ choi beomgyu
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choi beomgyu x fem!reader , tags: best friends to lovers au , beomgyu is annoying(ly cute) , fake dating? nah... fake married? bingo! , reader is so fed up with beomgyu how is he still alive , fluff , black cat x golden retriever dynamic ??? , hinted bisexual!beomgyu happy pride month , hinted pining , nsfw , some cliche moments bc who doesn't love a good cliche
warnings: reader uses she/her pronouns and is referred to as a wife and "mrs" , cursing , playfully (?) threatening each other's lives , soft dom!beomgyu , sub!reader , pool sex , unprotected sex , marking , praise , creampie , cum eating , morning sex <3 , cunninglus (fem receiving) , overstimulation , dry humping , big dick gyu community please gather
a/n: another summer fic for you lovelies!! <3 i hope you guys enjoy this as much as i had fun writing it! (not edited yet!)
song recs: island - youha, spotless mind - jhene aiko, nature feels - frank ocean
wc: 10.7k+
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[I THINK WE JUST GOT SCAMMED.]
“wait, wait, wait. you did what?” 
you slowly lower your lukewarm cup onto the cafe table before taking out your airpods—no music is playing, but you want to be 100% sure you heard him right. your best friend shoots you a lopsided grin from across the table, stirring his drink with the chewed straw in between his fingers.  
“i entered us into an exclusive giveaway for married couples to win a trip to greece for a week?”
one by one, you can feel your brain cells begin to die off at his words, your eye twitching while beomgyu smiles innocently at you. 
“beomgyu, i’m going to ask you a simple question and i want a simple answer.” pinching the bridge of your nose, you inhale for a second before meeting his eyes with the most exasperated gaze you've ever worn in your life. “why?”
the brown-haired boy is all too quick with a reply.
“why not?” beomgyu shrugs, his tiny grin morphing into something menacing on his lips—as if this is the funniest thing that has ever happened to him in all of his 22 years of life. 
you have the sudden passing thought to throw your coffee at his face, but that’s a precious $6 you’d never get back, so you refrain from doing so. instead, you take a slow, deep breath and momentarily close your eyes.  “god, if you’re out there, please, please give me patience.”
“i’m pretty sure the phrase is ‘god give me strength’,” beomgyu retorts from his seat across from you, sipping annoyingly on his nearly empty caramel frappe.
you blink at him once, twice. “if god gave me strength, you’d be in a casket right now.”
beomgyu simply cackles at your response, feigning a scared face with his hands up like he’s being held at gunpoint before he continues to laugh at his own mockery. you kick him under the table, successfully wiping that wide smile off of his dumb face.
“what was that for?” beomgyu whines with a pout, reaching down to rub his shin. a few heads turn to see what the ruckus is about and you shoot them a polite, apologetic smile and bow before turning back to mr. drama queen. the kick wasn’t even that hard.
“did you even think about what would happen if we actually won? we don’t have the time nor the money for a resort in greece.”
“oh, calm down, y/n. you know no one ever actually wins those things, right? they’re all scams.” beomgyu waves you off with his hand before bringing the green straw back up to his lips, your ears bleeding at the sound of his obnoxious slurping. you can’t stand his face.
“and how are you so sure of that?”
“because i entered that nickelodeon giveaway thing when i was 11 and never heard back from them.”
you blink at him again, thrice this time—just in case you’ve been transported into a different dimension and a stupidity demon has possessed your best friend’s body. nonetheless, beomgyu is still grinning idiotically as he chews on his straw, tilting his head at you like a maltese.
“please be so serious right now.” 
“i am! plus, even if we do win—which we won’t—and it’s not a scam… shit, that’s a free trip to greece!”
the joy on his face boils your blood to no end. he’s truly dense; you can’t believe you’re insane enough to call him your other half. everything on earth must be balanced out, you suppose—the yin to your yang.
“have you considered the fact that we aren’t married?” you cock your head at him, hands folded on top of the table, speaking slowly as if you’re talking to a child… hold on, wait—you literally are.
“shoot—could’ve fooled me!” beomgyu lets out a puff of laughter. “we might as well be.”
you blink at him again.
“please don’t ever say that again. i think i just threw up in my mouth.”
beomgyu rolls his eyes before snatching his phone out of his pocket with the speed of light to show you the flier he had screenshotted. he shoves the phone in your face, tapping incessantly at the bottom text of the photo.
“look. it says all expenses paid.” 
you stare at him with a silent ‘so what?’ and beomgyu sighs dramatically as he lowers his phone. he has the nerve to be exasperated with you? you’ll never understand where men get the pure audacity.
“so you’re going to look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn’t pretend to be my wife for a few days so we can get a free trip to greece?”
you look him straight in the eye. “beomgyu, i’d rather be burned on a stake.” 
“yea, 'cause you’re a fucking witch,” he mumbles under his breath, trying to hold in his laughter. you don’t know how much more patience you have with him, so you simply exhale, checking the clock on your phone.
“i don’t have time for this—i gotta get to my lecture,” you huff out, standing as you grab your bag that sits by your feet. beomgyu pitifully whines, looking up at you with the biggest puppy dog eyes known to man.
“would you seriously not do it?” 
it’s now your turn to laugh, picking up your coffee to take a big sip. you’re gonna need the caffeine. 
“those things are scams, gyu—you said it yourself! see you later.”
nights are oh, so serene, you think, as your head hits your fluffy pillow later that night. you’re freshly showered and tucked under your covers, snug as a bug in a rug as you doze off to the lovely scent of your hibiscus air freshener and the quiet waves of your sleep sounds machine. there’s no need to count sheep—you’re completely drained from all of the walking you had to do today. all of your classes just so happen to be on opposite sides of the campus, and you’re sure your step counter is on the verge of exploding by now.
your mattress feels even comfier today, a slight breeze coming through your cracked window, balancing out the heat from your thick duvet. it takes no time at all for you to be tugged under by the lust of sleep, drifting off to a perfect dreamland full of bright colors and open fields and your blaring ringtone.
wait.
your ringtone?
you don’t even bother to open your eyes, patting around your bed for your phone before you feel the cool screen against your fingertips. it takes a few failed swipes to actually answer, mumbling out a half-asleep “hello?” as you lazily press the device to your ear.
“hi, my wonderful bff. my world, my girl, my bro, my home-shizzle! hypothetically, on a scale of one to ten, how mad would you be if i told you that the greece trip thing wasn’t a scam? and that we won? and that we leave in 2 days? hypothetically.” 
the silence is incredibly loud.
“eleven.”
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[NEWLYWEDS.]
three months ago, if you were to tell yourself that you would be adorning a fake amazon wedding ring with your best friend’s arm wrapped around your waist as you stand inside some modern insurance firm being interviewed as a newlywed couple—well, you probably would’ve admitted yourself into the nearest asylum.
you don’t know what choices from your past led you to this moment, forcing a smile as a middle-aged woman with the cleanest-cut bob you’ve ever seen enthusiastically shakes your hand before moving on to beomgyu’s. he seems completely unfazed and the thought alone irks your soul to no end.
truthfully, this is all your fault. if you would’ve just told beomgyu that you are not going to pretend to be his wife for a week, you would’ve never ended up in this situation in the first place. but can anyone blame you when he offered to pay for your coffee every single day for the next 6 months, and wash your car, and take out your trash for as long as you ask him to? 
right! any sane person would’ve said yes, too!
so here you are as mrs. choi (gag), laughing along as the lady cracks a few jokes, complimenting beomgyu’s silky hair and your bright smile before sighing dreamily.
“my goodness, aren’t you two just the cutest newlyweds i’ve ever seen! how many months has it been?”
beomgyu looks down at you with a soft smile; anyone who is meeting him for the first time would’ve taken the gaze as something filled with pure adoration and undiluted love… but you know him. you see the way his eyes sparkle with mischief, the annoying quirk of his playful grin, and the pure amusement that washes over his features at your subtle glare. 
he’s having way too much fun with this. 
you pinch his side hard, a small bout of victory washing over you as he flinches.
deserved.
“we’re coming up on three months now?” beomgyu speaks through slightly gritted teeth before looking back up at the short woman, sending a charming smile her way. she squeals, bouncing on her heels and you bite back a grimace at the sheer volume.
“we decided to travel a bit before settling down and buying a home here in seoul,” you speak robotically, following the exact script you both came up with in your notes app on facetime last night. beomgyu hums in affirmation, tapping your side in a silent “good job”.
“awe! how sweet is that? what a wonderful idea to travel together while you're still young and nimble, unlike this old lady right here.” the lady honks out a laugh as she points to herself with her thumbs. you glance over at beomgyu who seems to be having the time of his life and—the regret of saying yes quickly settles deep in your bones. “you pair are such a lovely and beautiful couple!”
her high-pitched and overly enthusiastic voice pierces your ears and you can already feel the headache coming on.
“well, what can i say? it was love at first sight. i knew i had to make her mine and see the world with her as soon as possible,” beomgyu smoothly recites, gazing back down at you with the same look as before. you feel the bile rise in your throat. the words are so foreign to your ears, it’s almost jarring. the lady doesn’t even notice your discomfort and continues on and on about how cute you both are, how you remind her of her niece, and how beomgyu should totally be a model.
you force the fakest smile ever as beomgyu pinches your side, a cue for you to speak up. resisting the urge to punch him for pinching you (even though you had done it first), you simply nod along with an artificial laugh, your hand coming up to rest on his chest in faux infatuation.
ew. 
“marrying beomgyu was the best decision i’ve ever made. i’ve never been happier.” 
you swear you feel your eye twitch as the lady coos—she claps her hands excitedly, her short bob bouncing with the movement.
“how heartwarming! i’m sure this trip will bring you even closer, shedding a new light on the glitter of your love for decades to come!”
you and beomgyu are silent for a beat—because what the fuck is she even saying?—before awkwardly laughing, nodding along in hopes that she’ll wrap this up quickly. the lady’s smile doesn’t falter for a second as a stiffness fills the air, clapping her hands again as he ushers you two towards the lyft.
“better get a move on so you don’t miss your flight! i hope you have a wonderful time, lovebirds! and congratulations once again!”
the car is absolutely silent as you both settle in after all of your luggage is loaded up. beomgyu has this annoying, close-lipped smile on his face, his lips pursed like a duck—he’s so obviously trying to hold in his laughter as you grumble under your breath, snatching that stupid plastic ring off of your finger. 
you glance at him before rolling your eyes. “go ahead.”
in the blink of an eye, his boisterous laughter fills the car, high and squeaky, and you silently empathize with the lyft driver who subtly turns the radio up to combat the intrusive noise. beomgyu’s doubled over, patting his leg as he gasps for air, eyes squeezed shut; and as much as you hate to admit it, your own lips quirk up into a small smile at the sound. curse your best friend and his contagious laughter.
“i can’t believe we just did that,” beomgyu heaves out before another round of giggles leaves his lips. he reaches up to push his hair out of his face before wiping at his eyes dramatically. 
“i didn’t think i had it in me,” you agree, giving in to the grin that slowly spreads across your face. you make the horrible decision of meeting beomgyu’s eyes, and it takes less than a millisecond for you both to aggressively burst out laughing, bodies falling against each other's as your limbs grow weak.
“no, that was the funniest shit ever, i swear. we sold it.”
“for a second, i actually thought you were really in love with me.” your laughter slowly dies down as beomgyu lifts himself off of you, his chest rising and falling quickly as he attempts to catch his breath. you’re sure you don’t look any better—you definitely have abs after all of that.
“i just had to pretend that you were i.u,” beomgyu admits with an overexaggerated dreamy look off into the distance. you’re quick to fall into another fit of laughter but for a different reason this time.
“i.u doesn’t date freaks.”
beomgyu’s lips dramatically pout as he crosses his arms over his chest like a little kid, scoffing at your comment. “why do you always have to crush my dreams?”
“i don’t always crush your dreams. only when they’re stupid.”
“so… always?”
“no—yes.”
beomgyu’s quiet for a moment, turning his head to look out the window. his eyebrows are slightly furrowed, but the expression quickly smooths out as he turns towards you, uncrossing his arms to play with the fake ring on his finger.
“i’m not taking the couch.”
“what?” 
“it’s a couple’s suite. i’m taking the bed since i’m the one who entered us in the first place.”
you resist the urge to roll your eyes again—your mother had told you that one day your eyeballs would get stuck in the back of your head, and right now, that idea didn’t seem so bad. beomgyu’s teasing smile is anger-inducing, and you think you might rip it off if you have to look at it any longer. 
“what happened to chivalry? i’m your wife now, so as the man, you have to give me the bed.”
“fuck chivalry! you’re mean to me. i owe you nothing,” beomgyu huffs, squinting his eyes at you.
“i’m not mean to you,” you immediately defend, hitting his arm for even making such heinous accusations. beomgyu gasps, reaching up to hold his arm where you made impact.
“see? mean!”  once again, the dramatics are almost admirable—there’s no way that hurt. he’s been hitting the gym with his roommate taehyun lately, and you’ve seen the way he’s bulked up from the scrawny shrimp boy he used to be in high school. if anything, the hit hurt you!
“let’s play rock paper scissors, then. two out of three gets the bed.”
beomgyu huffs, but obediently holds up his fist. “fine.”
three games pass by in a blur.
“you cheated!” he whines, pointing his finger at you with wide eyes, his eyebrows shot up into his hairline.
“how did i cheat? just admit you suck ass, mr. couch.” your triumphant smile results in another whine from the loser next to you, putting his fist back up for a rematch. “no, i already won!”
“you’re lucky i love you.” beomgyu’s quick to give up, a tiny smile appearing on his face at the way you pretend to gag at his words.
those butterflies in your stomach are only because you skipped breakfast that morning—totally not because of the soft gaze he sends your way, mindlessly playing with the plastic ring on his finger as you two fall into a comfortable silence. totally.
this sucks.
today is the first time you’ve ever ridden in first class, and you can’t even enjoy it because of the exhaustion running rampant through your veins. there’s a reason why you picked all afternoon and late night lectures; why you avoid any invitations to go out for breakfast with your friends; and why you have blackout curtains on all of your windows. you are not a morning person, whatsoever, and with that 8 a.m interview and your flight at 10 on the dot, you’re absolutely beat.
for starters, pretending to actually be in love with your best friend in front of a lady who cannot speak at a normal, human volume is more taxing than swimming from portugal to australia with no breaks. you swear. second, beomgyu has apparently never ridden an airplane before and therefore has no idea what airport etiquette is. 
(“you have to put all of your electronics in the bins, okay?”
“when i go through the x-ray thing, will they see my underwear? oh my god, no, will they see my dick?”
“no, they won’t see your dick, beomgyu.”
“but how do you know they won’t see my dick? sick fucks.”
“they’re literally doing their job, beomgyu.”
“they can do their job without looking at my dick!”
“they aren’t going to see your dick!”
the lady in front of you covers her kid's ears as she shoots you two the nastiest glare you’ve ever seen. you both bow in apology before you flick beomgyu on the back of his neck.)
you can barely keep your eyes open as you watch some marvel movie on the little screen in front of you, fighting to at least stay awake long enough to order dinner. it’s futile, though, because you’re already blacking out every few minutes, head lulling side to side like a bobblehead. 
you finally give up the battle, reminding yourself that there will be endless food at the resort, so you settle yourself into your plush seat, resting your cheek against your neck pillow. from this angle, you have a perfect view of beomgyu who’s in the secluded seat next to you, and—oh.
he looks… he looks softer than usual, only illuminated by the natural light emerging through the circular windows. his hair is slightly mussed from his fingers, his long fringe hanging over his eyes in such a way that he has to keep shaking it out of his vision. he has his earbuds in, watching the sky through the tiny window next to him with his bottom lip in between his teeth—a habit he’s had since he was young. you know he’s thinking, lost in his mind abyss by the way his fingers fidget with the end of his shirt, his leg shaking incessantly.
“hey, gyu,” you call out quietly so as to not disturb anyone else around you. his music must’ve been turned down low, seeing as his eyes find yours at the call of his name, taking an earbud out to hear you better. “you okay?”
if there’s one thing you know about your best friend, it’s when he’s nervous. it shows with the way his leg doesn’t stop moving, even as he nods out a yes in reply to your question, seeing his jaw move as he grinds his teeth together. 
“the plane keeps shaking,” he whispers, eyes wide and worried as a little bit of turbulence rocks the cabin right after he finishes speaking. even in your tired state, you can’t help but laugh softly at his animated expression, shaking your head.
“are you scared?” the teasing tone in your voice is apparent—beomgyu rapidly shakes his head in disagreement, but you see right through him as his hand grips the armrest, eyebrows knitted together. everything in your nature tells you to tease him, rile him up a bit, poke fun at him—but he genuinely looks concerned, and you’re too tired to come up with anything witty to say. instead…
“it’s just turbulence. you’re okay, gyu.”
you watch the way beomgyu relaxes ever so slightly, nodding his head as his grip loosens. you send him a little smile, not bothering to wait for him to smile back before turning your head the other way, finally letting sleep pull you under.
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[FREE MARGARITAS.]
you don’t get a single moment to look around the resort because as soon as you both lug all of your things into your suite, you’re told a romantic, candle-lit dinner on the beach just down the hill has been reserved for you two as a welcome gift by the company. you’re not complaining of course, but you still would’ve liked to at least get acquainted with the area before indulging in everything.
it takes you an hour and a half to get ready; partially because beomgyu’s showers take forever. he’s in there singing along to some random 70s hits playlist, having the time of his life, while you take the time to look around the suite. 
it’s huge, to say the least. a single pod building that sits on a hill full of others alike with pristine white walls and elegant decoration—it’s almost 3 times bigger than your own apartment and you can only imagine how much all of this would’ve cost. wide, open windows line the walls with marbled tile underneath your feet, the furniture ranging from white to beige to a palette of blues, mimicking the colors of the beach in the distance.
outside is a wide patio with a glistening pool and comfy lounge area, complete with a loveseat and a swing. it has the perfect view of the coast, the sun already lowering behind the horizon. it’s absolutely breathtaking, and you make sure to take plenty of pictures, even posting a few on your instagram story (without tagging beomgyu, because you’re pissed at how long he’s taking in the bathroom.)
by the time he comes out, his hair is blow-dried and pushed out of his face with a headband. he looks like casper the friendly ghost with the white facemask he adorns and you stifle a laugh at the thought. 
you force yourself to dismiss the way he only has a towel wrapped around his waist, chest completely bare as he strides over to his suitcase—he doesn’t even bother to acknowledge your presence as he pulls out the most formal thing he can find, dropping it onto the bed.
“you gonna shower or what?” he asks over his annoyingly broad shoulder, hands reaching down to undo the towel around his waist. a yelp leaves your lips at the sudden movement, covering your eyes as you rush towards the bathroom.
“you’re disgusting!” you yell before slamming the door shut, locking it for good measure. his cackles ring throughout the suite and you flick him off from behind the wall—he can’t see it, but you want to at least get it out of your system.
halfway through your shower, you realize you forgot to bring your clothes into the bathroom to change. you blame this all on beomgyu—half because somehow every inconvenience in your life is all his fault and half because you just want a reason to ignore the way you keep thinking about how toned he’s gotten recently. you mentally make it your mission to shut down every single gym in his vicinity.
you wrap your towel tight around your body before cracking the door open, the cool air from the a/c attacking your skin like icicles. poking your head out, you scan the room for any sign of your counterpart, but the room seems to be completely empty. you wait a few seconds, just in case he decides to make any unannounced appearances before deeming the room safe enough to enter. the coast is clear.
you rush over to your suite case, unzipping it to find an appropriate dress, deciding on a white one to match the white button-up beomgyu had pulled out. you grab your makeup bag, as well as your perfume and it isn’t until you stand back up to find refuge in the bathroom that you notice the figure in the doorway. you jump in surprise, a small scream escaping your lips as you wrap your arms around yourself defensively. 
“you fucking stalker,” you huff as he doubles over in laughter. 
“oh my god, you should’ve seen your face,” he gasps, holding his hand to his stomach as his entire body vibrates with cackles. despite the venomous glare you send his way, your eyes can’t help but catch onto the fact that beomgyu cleans up nicely. 
you’ve gotten so used to beomgyu’s endless collection of sweatpants and hoodies that the thought of him looking like an a-list celebrity never once crossed your mind. the top few buttons of his shirt are undone, exposing the smooth expanse of his chest, appropriately decorated with a few layered necklaces. it seems like he decided to trade out his usual dangly earrings and ear piercings for simple studs that shine when the chandelier above you hits them. 
those black dress pants hug his legs in a way that makes you swallow, feeling your body grow warm at the way he tucks his hands into his pockets. he cocks his head at you curiously, a jesting smile on his lips—he looks infuriatingly good, to the point where you have to physically rip your eyes away from him.
“like what you see?” he badgers while he strolls into the room, as if he can see right through your little facade. you scoff, holding your stuff tight to your chest as you flee towards the bathroom again. 
“what happened to privacy?” you make sure to completely ignore his previous question—he can tell all too easily when you’re lying, and you really don’t feel like being teased relentlessly tonight.
“what’s the issue? you’re my wife now, aren’t you?” his voice is provoking, playful as you burn through him with another intense glare.
“beomgyu, i promise you, i will drown you in that pool if you say another word.” and then you happily slam the door shut in his face.
“no, you won’t! you love me too much,” he singsongs from behind the door. all you can do is roll your eyes because—yes. yes, you do.
you don’t think you’ve ever seen beomgyu act so… gentlemanly ever since he tried to get his 6th grade crush to like him back—but this time, without the weird phrases he stole from western movies and the electric blue braces that lined his teeth.
he’s committed to this husband act; pulling your chair out for you and pushing you in after you take a seat, kissing the back of your hand (you kicked him under the table at that), and even telling you that you look, and you quote, “absolutely stunning, baby.”
you hope your discontentment isn’t showing too obviously through your forced smiles and giggles, that plastic wedding band around your ring finger uncomfortably sticking to your skin. 
you can’t deny the fact that the dinner is really nice, though. never in your life would you have thought you’d be drinking expensive wines and eating 5-star cuisine on a beach with your childhood best friend—you’re pretty sure 14-year-old y/n would’ve complained about how it should’ve been choi soobin from 4th period instead of beomgyu, but you’ll take what you can get.
in all honesty, it simply feels like a normal dinner out with your best friend. you both still laugh and joke as usual, reminiscing on the time when beomgyu forgot to take out his retainer before his band performed at the school festival in 10th grade, resulting in a slurred rendition of sk8er boi by avril lavigne and a crowd full of giggling onlookers. (if you had to threaten a few people to leave beomgyu alone about it afterward, then so be it.)
the thing is, it’s not hard to let go around beomgyu. you’ve known each other since you were in diapers; defending beomgyu from bullies in elementary, attending all of his self-made band’s concerts, and hanging out on your rooftop eating popsicles and gummy worms. you could complain all you’d like about his teasing, his constant, exuberated nature, and his inane questions, but there’s no one else that you’d put your life on the line for, other than the puppy-like man in front of you.
his eyes sparkle with the reflection of the candlelight as he rambles on about how he genuinely thought planes did a loopty-loop before taking off and your heart aches with a sort of warmth you’ve been trying to dismiss for so long. 
the dinner ends all too quickly, and by the time you down your last glass, you realize you’re slightly tipsy. you’ve always been a lightweight, but you really didn’t think you drank that much—you must’ve been too distracted by beomgyu’s crazy stories to acknowledge the waiter constantly filling your glass after every few sips. at least it was free.
you slightly wobble on your heels as you take a stand in the sand, a little noise of surprise leaving your lips as a warm hand meets your hip, swiftly steadying you. you look down and automatically recognize the amazon ring, your head turning to meet beomgyu’s gentle eyes.
“don’t tell me i have to carry you all the way back.” and even though it’s a joke, there’s a layer of genuineness in his tone as you stumble again.
“‘m not that drunk,” you reply with the slightest of slurs, quietly giggling at the simple image of beomgyu carrying you bridal style to the bed. now that would truly sell the act, for sure. beomgyu shakes his head with a small smile, but his hand doesn’t leave your waist as he guides you back towards the suite, his touch firm and sturdy. 
you’re almost across the beach when you stumble again, but this time, your heel actually gives out as you trip, a tiny yelp leaving your lips right before you hit the ground. you squeeze your eyes shut, bracing yourself for the impact—but it never comes.
“yep. i’m carrying you.”
you crack an eye open to see beomgyu with an amused smile on his face, both of his hands holding onto your hips. turns out you weren’t even close to hitting the ground at all… okay, maybe you are drunk.
“piggy back ride?” you ask with a little giggle. you’re reminded of that time beomgyu had to give you a piggyback ride all the way back home from the park after you sprained your ankle trying to do a backflip off of the swing in elementary school. what a time.
beomgyu rolls his eyes fondly, but gives you a little nod, letting go of your waist to kneel down by your feet. “give me your foot.”
you give him a quizzical look, cocking your head at him in pure confusion before he pats his thigh, motioning towards your leg. still a bit out of it, you hold onto his shoulder as you lift your foot, feeling a weird sensation rush up your spine at the way he gently holds onto your calf to slip your heel off of your foot. he does the same to the other without a word, completely unfazed by the way your mouth remains slightly ajar in shock. his fingers are gentle and soothing against your skin, despite being mildly calloused from his guitar back home.
it’s enough to throw you off, swallowing as his eyes meet yours again. his eyes are incredibly soft as he smiles up at you—he motions towards his back with a quiet “hop on”.
you obey, only faltering slightly as your arms sling around his shoulders. with the new proximity, you can smell his cologne, something sweet and woodsy. his hands grab onto your thighs—one decorated with high heels hanging off two of his fingers—before hiking you up a bit. he begins walking, saying something about how he thinks there’s 10 tons of sand in his shoes by now—and if he notices you’re too distracted by his hands on your legs to process what he’s saying, he doesn’t mention it.
the view is absolutely breathtaking through the glass tall windows of your suite, the rays bouncing off of the pool as you watch beomgyu wade in the water, his eyes shut. it’s weird seeing him like this—fully relaxed, calm, and still. 
it seems like ever since you met beomgyu, all chubby-cheeked and busy-bodied, he’s always been on the move. whether it be to sprint down the road to meet you at the corner so you can walk to school together, or high in the air as he jumps on your trampoline… and even when his body is physically still, his mouth still runs a mile a minute, talking about anything and everything in the entire universe, letting his thoughts run wild around you.
as much as you truly do adore his silly side, him being the main reason why you were able to break out of your shell in the first place, you can’t help but be slightly fascinated with this alternate side of him.
it’s morning now; the yellowish-white hue of the blinding sun bounces off of his skin as he soaks up the moment, his brown hair getting so long it falls down the back of his neck in soft layers. you feel like a creep, watching him like this, but something about the entire atmosphere makes your eyes unable to look away as you slowly sip on the complimentary margaritas. 
your best friend has always been attractive—that’s one thing you cannot deny. he’s had his fair share of flings, and partners (and even a throuple once) throughout the years while you’ve only endured a few situationships here and there. he’s been called handsome his entire childhood and well into his adult years, taking the compliment in stride. he never let it get to his head or fuel his ego, though; for some reason, that fact makes him even more appealing.
he’s always just been your best friend, and you both are incredibly okay with that label—you know each other best, and that’s all that really matters. never mind the way his eyelashes flutter like monarch butterflies, or the way his cheeks flush when it’s too cold outside, or the way his leg bounces when he’s excited or nervous, alike. you try to ignore the way his laughter always manages to make the sun come out, and the way he always orders for you at restaurants because he knows you aren’t a fan of talking to strangers, and the way he seems always to know what you need, right when you need it.
he’s truly the yin to your yang. but there’s something else bubbling under the surface that you aren’t quite sure you’re ready to acknowledge yet. 
a loud call of your name grabs your attention, your vision focusing on a grinning beomgyu waving you down from the edge of the pool. you don’t even have it in you to huff at the prospect of moving from your comfortable lounge chair, standing up to make your way to the large patio. sliding the door open, you poke your head out, immediately feeling the muggy air of midday wrap around you like a heated blanket. 
“get in with me! the water is super warm,” he calls, motioning you towards him with his arm, the action flicking water everywhere. you frown a bit, looking at the pool behind him before meeting his eager eyes again.
“you know i can’t swim, idiot.” 
beomgyu’s smile doesn’t falter for a second as he shrugs, holding his hand out.
“then i’ll do the swimming for you.” 
the offer is so light-hearted and casual—it shouldn’t make your heart lunge in your chest, your gut twisting with anticipation at the simple implications of his words.
you’re already in your bathing suit from the mirror selfies you took for simply the aesthetic—a simple blue bikini tied tightly around your frame. you really don’t want to waste your time here; when else will you get the chance to stay in greece for free with your best friend? 
so you let your feet carry you to the stairs of the pool, your fingers wrapping around the metal railing as you slowly step in, foot by foot. by the time you’ve made it waist deep, you begin to feel the fear creep into your bones.
“i won’t let you drown, y/n,” beomgyu laughs as you suspiciously eye the deep end of the pool, unable to even see the bottom of it. your hand tightly grips the rail as beomgyu wades his way toward you, holding his hand out for you to take. “i promise. just hold on to me.”
you nibble on your lip as your eyes flicker down to his hand, feeling the water move gently around you. drowning has always been one of your biggest fears, and because of that, you’ve always stayed far away from any body of water capable of swallowing you up whole. 
but beomgyu’s eyes are warmer than the water, the most delicate of smiles resting on his soft features. there’s no room to be scared—not with the way his hand is so grounding as you take hold of it, squealing a bit as he tugs you closer. 
“do you trust me?” and when he speaks, his voice is just barely above a whisper, his face so close to yours that you can individually count his eyelashes. his margarita-tinted breath fans over your lips and you find yourself unable to cringe away, nodding cautiously in response. 
your hands tightly grasp his shoulders as he wraps a strong arm around your waist, holding you close to him as he uses his other arm to swim deeper into the pool. his doesn’t let up, even slightly, his grip sturdy around your figure as he utilizes one arm to keep you both afloat.
“here, wrap your legs around me,” he speaks, tapping your thigh under the water. you’re sure your eyebrows shoot up into your hairline, your mouth bobbing open and shut like a fish out of water.
“wha… huh?” you question oh, so eloquently, the rumble of beomgyu’s laughter transferring against your skin. his nose crinkles up in the way it always does when he finds something to be a bit too entertaining, his eyes forming those pretty crescent moons as his eyelashes tickle his cheeks.
“it’ll make this easier. i’m not trying to carry a dead weight,” beomgyu speaks as if it’s the most simple thing in the world. you’re still dumbfounded, blinking at him blankly—so he decides to take matters into his own hands, reaching down to situate you against him by himself. “there, that’s better.”
a persistent heat surges through your stomach as your brain slowly registers the position. beomgyu’s arm tightens around your waist as you adjust your hips in a way that makes your clothed core brush against his bulge. you almost see the way his eyes darken, his tongue peeking out to swipe over his bottom lip. it’s quiet, still as the distant sound of the beach’s waves and the gentle trickle of water fills in the silence. 
your arms slowly come up to wrap around his neck—you don’t know what possesses you; some weird entity that makes beomgyu’s lips look all too kissable, and his eyes sickeningly alluring. his adam’s apple bobs as his eyes flicker across your face. you don’t register the way he slowly wades you both toward the wall of the pool, effectively caging you in as your back gently presses against the tile.
you have the chance to run, to push him off of you, and go back inside—to pretend your core doesn’t pulse with want as he presses his entire body against you. his chest is warm and his eyes are blown out, and you can say no.
but you don’t want to.
his eyes search yours for something before they trail down to your lips, his hips meeting yours in a way that renders you slightly dizzy with the proximity. 
“tell me you don’t want this and i’ll stop, right now,” he whispers, his fingers leaving a ticklish feeling against your exposed skin under the water. you swallow.
“i want this, please.” and his lips are on yours before you can take another breath.
it’s nothing gentle; as if he’s been starved for your taste for all of eternity. the kiss is bruising as he nibbles on your bottom lip, his tongue meeting yours as you gasp into his mouth. he takes control easily, his hips moving against yours as the water moves around you, the sound mixing in with your quiet moans and beomgyu’s sparse grunts. 
he swallows all of your sounds, holding you down against him as he bucks up into your core, his dick hard and heavy in between your legs. you squeeze your legs tighter around his waist as you match his movement to the best of your ability. you’re nearly unable to think straight as he kisses the oxygen out of you, your mind growing hazy as pleasure shoots up your spine when he rubs against your clit just right.
beomgyu breaks the kiss to dive into your neck, sucking and biting small marks onto your unblemished skin before kissing over the soon-to-be marks. he can’t keep his mouth off of you as he trails his lips under your jaw, over your clavicle, nipping at your cleavage. your own voice sounds foreign in your ears as every lick and bite shoots straight to your core, feeling that knot in your gut tightens with every thrust.
“think you can cum just like this, hm? just from humping my cock?” beomgyu pants against your skin as his lips brush over your cheek, his breath fanning your ears. the head of beomgyu’s clothed dick catches onto your slit for the slightest of seconds, and you have to clench all of the muscles in your body to not cum on the spot.
“ye—yes, please don’t stop,” you whine, tilting your head back to invite his lips back to your neck. you’re sure you’re leaving marks on beomgyu’s shoulder blades from how hard your nails dig into his skin, but he doesn’t seem to mind—if anything, it makes his hips work faster against yours, pressing you full-on against the pool walls. 
“so good for me, fuck.”
beomgyu kisses up your neck, a low groan leaving his lips at the way you’re bouncing on his cock like a bitch in heat, clawing at his skin as your pussy clenches around nothing.
“gyu, ‘m—can i cum? please, please, please.” you can’t hold on anymore—not with the way beomgyu laughs against your skin, his free hand reaching up to grab your chin, forcing your lips against his again. he licks into your mouth with fervor, your teeth clashing together. your spit-slicked lips slide against each other, wet and messy, and he finally decides to take pity on you.
“go ahead, cum for me, baby.”
your brain goes blank as you finally come undone, blindly sinking into beomgyu’s lips and his faltering thrusts. your entire body tenses up as you moan against his lips, feeling like a ragdoll in the way he leaves soft kisses against your lax mouth. a low, rumbling groan emits from his chest as his hips still, twitching against yours subtly. he exhales once he finally pulls away from your swollen lips, his hand coming up to cup your cheek.
it takes a second for you both to catch your breaths and when you finally blink your eyes open, beomgyu’s puppy-like eyes are already on yours.
“you okay?” his voice oozes with a type of concern; care that feels all too intimate. his pupils are blown wide, alluring and deep as they scan your face. you nod with a small sigh, leaning forward to drop your head onto his shoulder. you feel his torso shake with a chuckle at the action, feeling an unnamed emotion run through your chest.
you don’t pay any mind to it, though. not while you're ruminating in a cum-contaminated body of water.
“we should probably call someone to clean the pool.” and the laughter that bubbles out of beomgyu’s mouth is enough to distract you, just for a moment.
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[I DO.]
it’s a weird, strange domestic feeling waking up to a fluffy head of brown hair resting on your shoulder, caged in by gentle arms around your waist. beomgyu’s always been a cuddler, and a week ago, you would’ve cringed at the simple thought of indulging him.
but now, a warm feeling blooms in your chest like a hydrangea as your fingers slip into his mussed hair to play with the strands. you’ve been cowed by your emotions, unable to fight off the fond smile that climbs onto your lips at the sight of the teddy bear-esque man clinging to you in his sleep. 
you don’t know what to do with all of these butterflies swarming in your chest, flapping against each other, kicking up a sandstorm of admiration that runs wild through your veins. he’s your best friend—and at this point in time, you know he’s more than that.
it’s crazy to think that romantic feelings can accumulate overnight, and you’re starting to suspect that maybe these feelings have existed all along. he’s the only one capable of rendering you speechless, whether it be from the crazy things he says or the way his eyes sparkle with a sense of youthfulness that tethers you two together. he’s the only one who can make you feel so carefree and in the moment—you don’t worry about the future or what’s to come with beomgyu. you simply enjoy the now, soaking up his blinding smiles and outlandish stories.
he’s waking up, you realize, as he mumbles under his breath, nuzzling closer to you. his lips brush your neck, his hair tickling your cheek in a way that makes your nose scrunch up with a small giggle. you feel drunk despite the fact that all of the alcohol has long dispersed in your body overnight—you blame it all on the fact that the sun sits high in the sky, shining kindly through the wide, open windows. it lights beomgyu up in a way that squeezes your heart painfully, the white sheets strewn across his waist making him look so soft and gentle.
“good morning,” you mumble with a tiny smile as beomgyu begins littering faint kisses against the expanse of your neck, brushing over the previous marks he’d left there yesterday. he simply hums in response, his arms loosening from around your waist to trail up the side of your body—his touch is so delicate, you let yourself get lost in the feeling, your eyes fluttering shut as he softly nips at your skin. 
he situates himself so that he’s hovering over you and you open your eyes again, feeling the sudden urge to shy away from his gaze. you’ve never seen such a look in his eyes—something so heavy and raw. as if he’s prying you apart and putting you back together again. it makes a shiver run up your spine.
“good morning, beautiful,” he finally replies and you can’t help but giggle again—you feel like a teenager, the way your stomach flutters at his morning voice, all deep and raspy and sultry. his brown eyes are half-lidded from sleep, his skin warm as his fingers brush your cheek.
the tension in the air isn’t incredibly prominent—it still lingers but with a less demanding presence. it’s natural and easy in the way it always is with beomgyu. existing with beomgyu is just so uncomplicated. 
you feel yourself melt into the sheets as he presses closer, molding himself into you perfectly—as if he was destined to be right here all along. his nose brushes yours as he leans in, and when his lips touch yours, any thoughts clouding your mind immediately disperse, making room for the sun itself. your arms come up to wrap around his neck, pulling him closer to you, feeling his heartbeat against yours. you feel safe, lax, content; all things good in the world. 
his lips are unrushed as they move against yours, silently speaking a thousand words as he cups the side of your face, his hips subtly moving against yours. you sigh into his mouth, tilting your head to deepen the kiss—you don’t care about morning breath or the fact that you probably look a mess with your ridden-up shirt and tired eyes. and beomgyu doesn’t care either, licking into your mouth as if you’re a rare delicacy, grinding down against your thin panties. 
he’s half-hard in his pants, desperately rubbing against you to chase whatever pleasure he can get. it’s endearing almost, the way he moans into your mouth as you reach down to slip your fingers past his waistband to trail a light touch over his dick. his voice is deeper than normal, stirring something inside of you that makes your legs clamp around his hips.
“i want you, gyu,” you breathe out once his lips finally leave yours, pumping him slowly. his lips catch in between his teeth as your fingers run over the head of his dick, feeling your fingers coat with sticky precum.
“hm? gotta be more specific than that, gorgeous,” beomgyu teases despite the way he’s slowly thrusting into your hand, smiling down at you in a way that usually would’ve pissed you off—but right now, it only makes your pussy drip with want. 
“i want you inside of me. want you to fill me up,” you whine out as his fingers rub your clit over your panties, moving lower to press against your damp entrance. his resolve crumbles all too quickly as you peer up at him with your doe eyes, lips parted as you whine softly, moving your hips against his fingers. 
“fuck, okay baby.”
you let him move away to strip himself of his sparse clothing as you pull your shirt over your head. the butterflies return quickly as you realize this is the first time you’re seeing each other completely unclothed and—oh god. he’s huge. your half-asleep state didn’t realize the sheer amount of dick between your fingers, but now that you’re seeing it in the morning light, you aren’t even sure if it’ll fit.
beomgyu makes his way back over to you, his fingers hooking onto the band of your panties to drag them down your legs. his eyes are almost predatory as he takes in your glistening folds, unable to stop himself from running his fingers over your cunt, collecting your juices.
“you’re dripping,” he awes, his eyes flickering up to yours with a small smile. a heat rushes up your neck, shyly covering your face with both of your hands. beomgyu’s small laugh resonates throughout the room, feeling his clean hand come up to gently move your arms away.
when you meet his eyes again, they’re filled with a sort of fondness that makes your head spin, makes your heart stutter—it’s horrible and you can’t help the small whine that leaves your lips as his fingers return to your cunt, slightly dipping into your hole, soaking them even more.
“i want you to look at me. can you do that?” beomgyu gently requests and you’re nodding before you can fully register his words. he flashes you a proud smile before he brings his wet fingers up to his mouth, licking them clean of your juices. an airy, surprised moan leaves your body against your will at the sight, and his smile broadens. “you taste amazing, baby.”
his middle finger enters your entrance with no resistance, and you feel yourself clench down as he curls it upwards to gently explore your walls. it’s all too much and not enough all at once. he’s going incredibly slow, as if you two have all the time in the world, but you can’t wait. you need him now.
“please, just fuck me. ‘m ready,” you demand through a whine, pleading with your eyes, an action that effectively softens beomgyu's gaze. he doesn’t remove his finger, but instead adds another alongside it, his thumb coming to brush against your clit. you buck against his hand with a small moan as he moves up your body, trailing kisses from your hipbone, to your breasts, and finally your lips.
it’s a chaste peck, but it’s enough to leave you wanting more, chasing after his lips once he pulls back. you whine at the loss, already feeling your brain turn to mush with the way his fingers slowly drag against the walls of your cunt, his thumb just barely applying pressure to your swollen nub.
“are you sure?” 
“yes, yes, ‘m sure. want your cock, gyu. just—” you’re nearly hysterical as your hips grind down on his fingers. you can already feel the frustrated tears brimming your eyelashes, reaching up to wrap your arms around his broad shoulders, your lips brushing against his. “please, please…”
“shh. it’s okay, baby,” beomgyu coos, pressing a few soft kisses to your lips. you quietly gasp as he removes his fingers from your hole. he kisses your cheeks all too delicately, his forearm resting by your head to steady himself. “i’ll take care of you. just relax.”
you almost cry happy tears with the way you feel the head of his cock tease your hole, dipping in but not fully entering. his lips find yours again as he drags his dick in between your sopping folds, swallowing his low moan at the feeling. “my perfect girl. so pretty, so wet for me.”
when he pushes in, your arms tighten around his neck, your enter body locking up at the intrusion. you feel like a virgin again, his girth stretching you open almost uncomfortably. his thumb rubs your hips to soothe you, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss to distract you from the feeling. he stops for a second, letting you get used to his dick as he peppers kisses across your face.
“fuck, it feels like you’re splitting me in half,” you blurt out and beomgyu can’t help but laugh softly, his forehead resting against yours. “i think i can feel you in my throat.”
“can you stop making me laugh so i can fuck you stupid, please?”
his words are lighthearted, but the thought of being fucked to the point where you can’t even speak has you shutting up in no time. you whine quietly as beomgyu continues pushing into you until he’s fully situated inside of your cunt—you’re fluttering around him like crazy, feeling the faint pain slowly dispersing into pleasure as he kisses your jaw.
“you can move now,” you mumble, and beomgyu wastes no time pulling out, almost all the way, just to snap his cock back into you with a force that rocks the bed slightly. you can’t cover up the choked-out gasp that leaves your lips, eventually turning into a stream of moans and whines as he quickly sets a brutal pace. 
his tip kisses your cervix with every thrust, your mind clouding over as pleasure fills your bloodstream, your pussy clenching around his thick cock. he places one last kiss on your lips before sitting up, both of his hands moving wrapping around your thighs. you’re so wet that his dick easily glides in and out of you, wet, squelching sounds filling the room as you drip around him. 
“you’re so tight, god. letting me fuck you raw like the needy slut you are,” he chastizes, groaning as he pulls your body in to meet his hips. his strokes are so deep, you already feel yourself nearing your high.
“yes, yes, yes. need you,” you cry out, hands gripping the sheets. “so big, gyu. ‘s too much, i can’t—” 
“you were the one crying for my cock, so you better take it.” his sudden demeanor change sends a tingly rush up your spine, leaving your brain a muddled mess. his bangs have fallen into his eyes, his cheekbones flushed with a slight pink from the physical exertion and the warmth of the sun beaming through the windows. his stomach contracts with every thrust into your wet heat, low moans and sharp gasps leaving his lips as his eyes fall shut, his head lolling back at the feeling.
your core throbs, gut tightening with every passing moment—at some point, he brings his fingers down to circle your clit, whimpers leaving your mouth at the overwhelming feeling of it all. you clench down around him, hand stretching out for something, anything; and it only takes a few seconds for beomgyu to notice. his fingers interlace with yours, giving your hand a grounding squeeze.
“gonna fill you up—gonna make a mess of this pretty pussy,” beomgyu pants out, a low moan leaving his lips as his hips slightly stutter.
“‘m gonna cum, gyu, ‘m cumming,” you babble out, your head rolling to the side as your eyes shut, the immense pleasure coursing through your body becoming all too much. somewhere through your muffled ears, you hear beomgyu praising you for taking him so well, but by that point, you’re already gone. 
the moan that leaves your lips is nearly pornagraphic, your fingers clawing at the sheets as your orgasm washes over you. all the air is punched out of your lungs and beomgyu thrusts deep into you before settling there, a low groan leaving his lips as his dick twitches inside of you.
“fuck, baby, i love you. i love you so much,” he breathes out as he cums—you feel the hot streaks of his cum painting your insides, shooting places you weren’t even sure existed inside of you. it leaves your mind hazy, unable to even process the way he pulls out, his cum dripping out of you and onto the white sheets.
the feeling of a hot, wet tongue against your entrance makes your hips buck up—you let out a surprised gasp that’s quickly overtaken by a whimper, your hand reaching to entangle itself in his hair.
“wait, gyu—fuck, i’m sensitive,” you whine, feeling your eyes brim with tears at the overstimulation. his tongue flicks against your abused cunt as he cleans up his own cum, fucking it back into you with his tongue. 
“you can take it, baby. i know you can,” he pants against your pussy before his lips encircle your clit, sucking and nibbling ever so slightly. you can’t control the noise leaving your lips, whining and moaning as your legs clamp around his head. beomgyu simply chuckles against you before two of his fingers enter your pussy, teasing and prodding at your sentive walls.
“gyu, i can’t, i can’t…” you sob, tears running down your cheeks as the overstimulation sends painful shocks up your spine. you’re gushing around his tongue, the sheets beneath you completely soaked through. your brain fights against itself, your body unsure of whether to press closer or pull away. you can’t think about anything other than beomgyu’s fingers and mouth, eyes squeezed shut as your body racks with sobs.
“yes, you can. cum on my tongue, pretty girl.”
and you do, your back arching as you moan loudly, your hand coming up to cover your mouth as your hips frot against his face, waves of pleasure washing over you, drowning you. your entire body trembles with shocks as your mind goes blank, flopping back onto the bed as you attempt to catch your breath. tears are still running down your cheeks—your entire body feels like it’s floating. you’re completely wrung out. that was probably the hardest you’ve ever come in your life.
you don’t even register beomgyu’s soft hands on your cheeks as he wipes your tears away, his lips pressing against your forehead, your nose; anywhere his lips can reach. it’s grounding as you slowly come back down to earth.
“you did so well for me, baby. so, so perfect. so beautiful. you took it all, i’m so proud of you.”
you blink your eyes open at his words, feeling those butterflies flock with the way he’s watching you so attentively, his eyes flitting across your face quickly. 
“i didn’t go too far, did i?” beomgyu’s voice is almost nervous, low and quiet in your ear as he strokes the side of your face. you crack a small smile at how cute he looks, reaching up to brush some of the hair out of his eyes.
“no, not at all. i liked it,” you reassure, your fingers trailing down his neck, playing with the hair on the back of his neck. he visibly melts into your touch at the words, shoulders slumping in relief. 
“thank god,” he breathes out, slumping on top of you—you half-heartedly protest, but the weight is nice, loving the way it feels to have his chest rise and fall against yours, his head resting in the crook your neck. you wrap your arms around him with a little giggle, pressing a kiss to his hair.
“you big baby,” you tease. he’s completely unbothered, though, pressing a quick kiss to your shoulder before settling against you again.
“only around you.”
the quiet is relaxing, hearing the calm waves of the beach down the hill and the slight buzz of the air conditioner. as much as your brain wants to believe that you imagined it, his words from a few moments ago ring like a mantra in your head. words that make your chest tight, and your mind spin, and your stomach flutter. having him in your arms like this makes you sure that what you heard wasn’t made up in your mind.
“you said you love me.”
a beat of silence.
“hm?” he hums inquisitively as if he didn’t hear you correctly the first time.
“when you, um—when you… came…” you whisper the last part, feeling the vibrations of beomgyu’s laugh fill your own chest.
“you’re still shy after all of that?” beomgyu asks incredulously as he lifts his head to look at you. a tiny, playful smile sits on his lips and you pout, nudging him softly.
“stop changing the topic!” beomgyu laughs again as he relaxes back into your hold.
“okay, i did say i love you. because i do. i love you.”
the words hit you deeper this time, now that your mind is clear—he sounds so sure of himself, and the confidence seeps into you, confirming your own feelings that have been threatening to spill over these last few days.
“i love you too.” you pause for a second. “ like, love love you.” 
beomgyu chuckles against your skin, his arms tightening around your frame as he nuzzles in closer to you, despite already being skin to skin. he’s cute, you think.
“i’d hope ‘love love’ is what we’re talking about right now,” he speaks almost sarcastically and you lightly tug his hair for being a smartass—you get the opposite reaction you were searching for though because beomgyu dramatically moans at the action just to rile you up even more.
“oh my god, you’re insufferable,” you huff, but the smile on your face is telling enough as he lifts his head once again to meet your eyes—his hair is all messy and strewn about, lips bitten red and raw, cheeks flushed; and that fact that you’re in love with your best friend full sinks in. he’s everything to you.
“but you love me.”
you sigh.
“yea. i do.”
a blinding smile breaks out on beomgyu’s lips as he leans in to peck yours a few times, your body melting as he kisses you with so many emotions, it makes your heart get caught in your throat, your skin buzzing with contentment. 
he pulls away, sitting up to climb off the bed, searching for his sweatpants.
“come on. time for me to do my husband duties and run you a bath.”
“you’re still comitting to this, huh?” you giggle as you sit up too, watching his figure retreat towards the bathroom. beomgyu turns slightly, the smile on his lips absolutely menacing.
“so? i gotta practice for the future.”
your future, you brain tells you.
and that idea isn't so bad, you think.
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reblogs and feedback are highly cherished!
tags! @grayscorner @banggyu0308 @huckleberrykai @agustdiv1ne @yunhorights @nes-caf @1921choi
masterlist
©️BEOM-PYU
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dazednstoned · 1 year
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Modern Rdr2 hcs:
-Abigail dresses like it's the 2000s (I'm talking miniskirts, low rise jeans, heeled flip flops w the fucking sparkles). She will never change too.
-Charles and Arthur go on dates to those adoption events to pet all the dogs and cats
-the whole gang frequently gathers for family bbqs. Every time someone ends up getting punched, passing out, or storming off
-Abigail puts Jack on one of those backpack leashes for kids (John too if we're being honest)
-Tilly, Karen, and Marybeth do full goodwill, garage sale, and vintage market days. They do not mess around either
-the only thing hosea knows how to do on his phone is play chess
-Sean still can't read in modern time
-john plays guitar and writes really horrible love songs for Abigail
-Javier and john r for sure in a band together, they're pretty good when they sing the songs Javier wrote
-Lenny and Sean co-parent an extremely neglected widgetable
-Arthur listens to facebook reels on full volume in public w no shame. Isaac is mortified every time
-john has various tattoos, half of them are god awful. He definitely got Abigail's name or initials tattooed somewhere and she was livid
-Karen gives herself piercings with a really shitty piercing gun
-arthur and John work together in construction, an auto shop, or in the equestrian field.
-Dutch has a very rigid and lengthy skincare routine
-john uses 2 in 1 shampoo and conditioner, but he says it's 3 in 1 bc it also counts as bodywash
-Tilly is the only one of her family to graduate college (Arthur dropped out of hs when Eliza got pregnant and john never went)
-Hosea is one of those old people you just see walking around the neighborhood at like 8am
-john and Arthur don't wear sunscreen or put on lotion. Abigail sometimes manages to force some sunscreen on John's face before he goes to work tho
-bill refuses to go to gay bars but uses Grindr
-Abigail cuts John and Jack's hair bc she refuses to pay for something she thinks she can do herself (she cannot do it herself)
-Kieran is a hair braiding god. I'm talking French braids, fish tails, you name it.
-john owns a really shitty pick up truck. Jack was either conceived or birthed in the backseat of it (maybe both)
-Sean falls for those free iPhone scams every time
-the only videogame charles plays is stardew valley. He thought it would be relaxing, it wasn't.
-Tilly and Mary Beth are in a book club together
-Abigail is the type of parent to not let her kid play w nerf guns or watch pg13 movies (John is the exact opposite)
-Sadie spends her weekends at rage rooms
-everyone's fridges are covered in drawings Jack made for them
-John, Javier, and Sean game together. Violence always ensues
-dutch does not tip waiters
-john tried to play catch w Jack once and ended up getting hit in the groin by a baseball. He didn't know 4 yr olds could throw that hard
-Abigail and Karen (& sometimes Charles) drink cheap wine together every Sunday and discuss the dumb things their boyfriends did that week
-Lenny and Hosea do the wordle everyday
-Jack is in little league soccer. John sits back drinking a beer as Abigail shouts at the referee
-Abigail got a tramp stamp of a little bow when she was 17 (she regrets it)
-Hosea exclusively sends emails
-Abigail hides John's weed socks bc she doesn't want Jack to see and "fall into a life of drugs" when he's older
-Arthur is a hiking dad through and through. While John is a sit on the couch drinking a beer w his kid in his lap kinda dad
-uncle is the old drunk that lived in the same trailer park as Abigail and John did when Jack was a baby. He kinda just stuck around after
-Miss Molly O'Shea would be a makeup god and u cannot convince me otherwise
I might do a pt 2 late in the future!
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howlonomy · 6 months
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Do the Sir Slithers ever get, like, a "turn" being the main pilots of poor gooped-up Kanako, or is it a more constant "Kanako is now herself and Slithers at the same time all the time but the Kanako personality is just more pronounced"?
Very intrigued by the dynamics of this, I imagine she probably surprises her mom every now and then with something that would've been very out of character for her pre-amalgamation
("How much of what I just said/did is the trauma talking and how much is the literal other people who soul-merged with me talking?")
kanako/sir slithers masterpost :]
the way it works is very much everyone gets their own personality, it just happens that bc kanako’s soul is more powerful, she got the body. so she can move the arms and legs, but the snake bodies/her hair she can’t, because theyre sill their own people. IF the sir slithers worked together, they might be able to take over the main body, but bc theyre all too busy fighting each other to be the main character nothing ever comes of it. kanako is always the strongest among them all.
and thats EXACTLY what i was thinking!! obviously, kanako is not the same monster she was before she fell down, but its hard for everyone (including kanako) to pick apart if her ooc moments are just because of trauma or because she’s fused with a bunch of other people with their own personalities. while the snakes can talk on their own, sometimes if emotions are high enough they can kinda,, fuse personalities a little. basically combine to one mind/one goal.
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oh yeah, absolutely. she hung around them bc they were kids like her, and their mom was with them and watched over them. unfortunately they got too close and fused. but it was also bc they were familiar; they came from the same place, and they reminded each other of home. she missed the dunes and dina and her mom, and the family reminded her of that. so they stuck together in a shitty awful place
and she doesn’t ever have to go anywhere; the entire family is on her back. their dad isn’t in the picture, so its just a mom and her 6 kids. just like real snakes lmao
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yeah!! they need to talk and get socialization in too. they enjoy talking to each other. theyre like friends attached to her all the time so they get up to some scams fun!
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gorgeouslypink · 10 months
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i just wanted to bring something to your attention bc you're the only blog that i think people acc trust
i think u know @trynafindbarbiee
sorry if this doesn't link but she blocked me so lol
basically she used to be a good void blogger but you can go look at her page yourself and now it's all just an ad for some random Instagram manifesting coaching account that she claims isn't hers (apparently it's someone who helped her manifest before she entered the void state but she never mentioned this before) but for some reason, keeps on advertising for and lowk gaslighting people into joining bc she says stuff like "do you not want your dream life? why don't you just pay already?"
her exact quote: “She’s open for coaching guys What are fucking waiting for? Don't u want your dream life? Are u not tired? Are u not fed up with all this? ARE YOU NOT?”
This is so disgusting to me to gaslight desperate people like this
Also, I was there when she first posted about that account. She said the insta account only charges $11.99 and then she changed it to $23.98.
Also all the success stories seem so fake. I'm not one to doubt success stories but the first few all seem like they're the same Indian girl and then the last 2 sound like random fictional novels. The second to last is a woman who was hospitalized and over 400 people visited her, like even presidents or celebrities don't get that many people and apparently she had money problems but none of the 400 people could give her any money or like the most recent one. the reason i even decided to call her out was because she made up a ridiculous story of a woman who got pregnant because she was taking antidepressants. i am majoring in healthcare and am very passionate abt this topic because some uneducated people believe this "that antidepressants can cancel out birth control" so they use that as a reason to not take them even though this is completely false and there is no evidence of antidepressants cancelling out birth control❗️
i am pretty sure trynafindbarbie is spiritual soya, it doesn't rlly make sense why she would be advertising her like this and ive noticed certain things like them both saying "peoples"but yeah i hope you can atleast just share this with your followers so they don't get scammed
i looked into this and you're absolutely right, it's a bit disappointing and i just get upset when i see people trying to gaslight and scam this community because the majority of this community are just young girls trying to get their dream life. i hope you guys know that you are so powerful and you can get your dream life on your own!
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ganondoodle · 17 days
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(idk if anyone wants to keep hearing my opinions on totk book stuff but-)
apparently it says that rauru DID have kids, multiple even, which yeah... is kinda necessary for zelda to even be connected to them so much so that sonia can SENSE a blood connection (which, even with all the excuses with magic, is just a little too far for me to suspend my disbelief bc its over, OVER, ten thousand years worth of generations that seperate her from them that one lil touch of the hand can sense that (feels more like an attempt to make you care about them or .. see them as zeldas "better" parents just bc they exchange a few nice words, i never got the feeling they were 'better' parents and its also kinda disrespectful to her actual parents, like sure rhoam wasnt the best but i wouldnt call rauru better just bc he was polite)- i could see maybe the light power of hylia or sth but since its the coolest dude that ever lived rauru now that had it which still doesnt make sense and makes me unreasonably annoyed and she can sense BOTH of their powers in her? nah) the fact theres NOTHING about them in the game itself is just so ... no way they planned any of this
i dont think theres anything they can do or say that wont make be believe they either
are making it up alla 'fix it in post' mentality trying to hastily explain stuff the game never bothers to do to try and appease fans or let it appear as if they thought about it at all
something went really REALLY wrong during development, which kinda seems likely given how the game turned out (im sorry i cannot let go, its not just the writing, the game design too and how little was changed in the map while being so damn expensive, i dont know how people dont feel scammed q_q)
given that they (allegedly) spent the last entire year of development on polish (where??? where????? huh??? like it would make it more understandable (EXCEPT for the price) if there was alot of trouble, which was also bc it got delayed and ... turned out like this, but they dont want to say it, especially given their reputation, with that quote i have heard way too many times 'a delayed game blah blah') i just??
are they just gonna go and do it like they did with kashiwa (kass)? "they uuuh where flying around the whole time ony cool sonau tech maschines, you just dont see or hear from them ooooorrr they were uuuuh out of the country at the time" (sending invitations to other continents to join their glorious kingdom ;) )
(bet they are also gonna say they did all the stuff like ... moving the shrines around (lol?) and lifting the islands up into the sky- which is still weird bc ... didnt they also say they were living in the sky before coming to the surface?? so where?? did they park all their islands on the surface and the mystery kids had the keys so they had to repark them back into the sky after they returned off camera?? xD also why are the islands so different as an environment if they where from the surface? like even the STONE up there is different- and if they were first in the sky then on the surface and the nback in the sky .. why is there not a single yellow tree or grass in the past- you cant really argue that it changed bc they were up there so long bc .. nothing else changed, the suddendly and totally always there sonau buildings are largely in prime condition, only some slightly moldy, and what we see of the glorious past looks barely any different from the present, aside from like ... some standard trees shuffled, no castle yet and that glowy uwu filter DESPITE that stupidly long time frame between it)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#idk if others feel like that too but i cant shake the feeling there was something that either went horribly wrong during development-#-or the entire thing was neglected the whole time which is why its so .. i hesitate to even call it bare bones#...which is WILD given that its the supposed sequel to their best seeling zela game#like wtf where you doing#i get that the pressure can be immense but imo it wasnt that hard to make a sequel to thats better than totk#like i think it was harder to make totk like it is NOW bc it scraps and throws away so many things you could have easily used-#-as sequel material#its all so weird to me#my tin foil hat theory is still that they saw the success of the mario movie and immediately shifted everything to make more movies#bc it made so much money#and a movie is easier to make than a good game#so totk or botw2 at the time got the short end of the stick#which is why everything feels like .. so ... bare bones .. untested .. unfinished .. non sensical...#like an alpha build that got enough visual polish to look like a full game when its still an alpha build at its core#some main ideas like the abilities implemented and the basic map layers#mechanics functioning but untested on how it feels to play#like the sage controls and arrow fusing and ... contradictory game mechanics that dont work together#like the bulding WORKS but its clunky and underused- everything can be cheated so easily you dont even feel good cheating-#-bc it feels like the teacher just allowed you to mark your test with a green circle and you still got an A (or however USA grades work)#despite not even reading the questions- why attempt to solve a puzzle if you can just skip it#and how they tell you to be creative with it yet creativity gets punished and only efficiency is rewarded#which completely undermines the entire thing#...theres so much more you know i have ranted about it all before#ALSO rauru and sonia seemed like a rather newly wed couple to me- not one that had multiple kids that never appear-#since it only mentions rauru ..... if its only his then ... that doesnt explain anything bc zelda needs both sonia and rauru dna#................do sonau leave eggs to incubate somewhere heavenly or sth#watch out the springs where built to hatch rauru eggs bc they need the gods holy blessing bc they are oh so holy to hatch
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poisonedprose · 2 years
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₊˚✧ valentines day!
chishiya, arisu, tatta, kuina, last boss x gn!reader headcanons
warnings: pre borderlands, lower case intended, typo, incomplete sentences, curse word (kuina) , nsfw implications (last boss)
masterlist
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chishiya ! ⋆ doesnt really celebrate and will only plan something if you want him too
⋆ thinks flowers are stupid so wont buy you them
⋆ "Y/N, im not buying you flowers, they are just going to die in a week"
⋆ but buys you whatever else you want (hes got that doctor money)
⋆ more of a stay in and chill kinda guy
⋆ but if you really wanna go to a restaurant and eat some overpriced medicore meal he'll endure it
⋆ overall youre in charge and whatever you say goes (except for flowers)
arisu ! ⋆ absolutely loves valentines day with you
⋆ from the moment you wake up he is bombarding your face with kisses
⋆ tries to make dinner but almost sets the house on fire
⋆ so you just end up ordering from your favorite delivery place
⋆ definitely asks you to play video games with him
⋆ if you say yes he lets you win
⋆ overall he loves valentines day and if he had his way, valentines day would be every month
tatta ! ⋆ i see him as the kinda guy to forget its valentines day
⋆ like hes just working and gets a text from you asking what you guys are doing tonight
⋆ and he just totally freaks about because he didnt plan anything yet
⋆ texts back saying its a surprise and then calls everyone he knows for help
⋆ he ends up making it a really special night tho
⋆ plans a nice picnic under the stars (and steals food from work)
⋆ overall even tho he forgot you never found out and you had a blast so win-win
kuina ! ⋆ this bitch spends MONTHS planning, every little detail is thought out
⋆ from what shes gonna wear to what you guys will talk abt
⋆ she def starts out by taking you shopping (with her employee discount)
⋆ and then a nice walk through the park as the sun sets
⋆ she might even lend you her jacket as it gets cold ;)
⋆ ends the night with a cute little firework show and lots and lots of kisses
⋆ overall she puts a lot of effort in because youre worth it
last boss ! ⋆ genuinely could not care less
⋆ "Valentine's day is just some capitalistic scam Y/N."
⋆ he buys you chocolate tho bc he does love seeing your smile
⋆ will deny he bought it for valentines day and claims he just saw it and bought it
⋆ and then refuses to talk to you for like 10 minutes before you're back in his arms
⋆ he will 100% try to use the fact that its valentines day to get some with no shame
⋆ overall hit or miss with him but its you so probs hit (if ykwim)
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cherrirui-official · 10 months
Text
Friendlocke Violet Gijinkas (Part 2/7)
PART 2 BAYBEE WAHOOO!! Three more gijinka designs comin right up!
I plan on posting them in order by groups of three, so there’s gonna be seven parts in total, all of which I’ll be linking here when done vvv
(Part One) (Part Three) (Part Four) (Part Five) (Part Six) (Part Seven)
!! These will contain personal headcanons I have for the cast, little fun facts, and also spoilers for Friendlocke Violet (for both the edited vids and the streams) This also contains a small amount of blood on one of the images!!
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@saltydkart-reblogs
And that’s pretty much it, designs under the cut!
JOE:
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The reason Joe dislikes most bird pokemon such as fletchling is because they're always stealing and pecking at the olives he... or well more specifically his company grows.
Speaking of which, they own a large plot of land which is used specifically to grow olive trees, which of course are used to make the olive oil he sells. What? Did you think that the olives come from Joe themselves? Of course not silly, welcome to capitalism.
That being said, Joe DOES know how to garden. When they first started their olive oil company they had to grow their own olive trees. Nowadays, in their spare time, they'll sometimes be found tending to the olive trees in their company's garden.
His crown is personally tailored for Joe and Joe ONLY. Crafted with the shiniest gold and the richest olives, all fit for a king! Somehow it never falls of his head. (Fun fact: the points are made to look like olive oil bottles)
Joe needs glasses but usually wears contacts when in public. Not that they look bad with glasses, it's just a personal choice.
Joe LOVES being involved in... well, anything! As long as it's not weird or sexual or illegal (that last one counts UNLESS it involves scamming others into buying his oil products), he is more than happy to invite himself into whatever is going on around him. What are you going to do? Stop him? Oh please!
HANNAH Ü:
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At the start of her career, she would spend her days doing her own one-man (or.. well... woman) shows at subway stations, telling stories and entertaining other pokemon and people alike while they waited for the next train to arrive.
Her hat and cape are made entirely of salt! She is able to transform her cape and hat into different shapes and usually used this ability of hers to make stuff such as accessories, hats, and props that fit the role she's donning at the time.
Hannah LOVES collecting stickers and often wears them proudly on her body (in her poke form ofc ofc). However, she usually has to get someone else to stick them onto her bc of her lack of actual hands.
Some of her improv roles are inspired by the people she meets while others are inspired by pieces of media she's interested in at the moment.
Will ABSOLUTELY learn a new language if she needs to for a role. Duolingo speedrun world record
MYKYIE:
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As stated previously, Mykyie used to be a circus performer before he quit to pursue his dreams. His most popular act involved him spinning plates on a stick while standing on a ball.
^^^ Because of this, he also has really, REALLY good balance.
Mykyie always keeps his Miku glowsticks on him, even when not attending any of her concerts.
"Anger Point" is basically an uncontrollable form of last resort whenever Mykyie is close to death but can still fight, it usually leads to him attacking whoever or whatever caused him great harm (In the instance of Lark, it was when he crit Mykyie and the ladder's health was extremely low.)
The Miku tattoo on Mykyie's arm was designed by Mykyie himself! However, it was drawn on him by an anonymous underground artist who went by many names to hide his true identity. The name that the artist went by at the time Mykyie got his tattoo was "Cl@ir33"
The cuffs and cape that he wears are... well, WERE, red. An unknown force seems to be slowly turning them into a shade of blue.
And that's all the HCs for now! Next Gijinka batch will consist of GrAce, Braidy, and Christene's
Also here's the posterless version of Joe's Gijinka bio before I go
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juxtaposed-nerd · 1 year
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back on my aapi heritage month headcanons!!
- hermie being jodie’s kid means that hermie is also half chinese and he never understood what that meant growing up w white adoptee parents who also didn’t get his love for the scam
- wasian (chinese) glenn & wasian (viet) morgan leads to wasian nick, and cassandra has the same sweetness and patience of my thai cousins so taylor is everything but japanese/korean but he absolutely adores everything j-pop/j-fashion/k-pop/etc etc
- half chinese hermie who always knew that he felt different but didn’t know how to vocalize it and he thought it was a race thing and not a demon/goof thing
- nick close is not attached to his culture at all bc morgan was the leading force of culture in the house, the only culture he knows is rock n roll (this means glenn is totally detached from his asian side as well but i think as he gets older he genuinely wants to know more about his history)
- nicky swift has a mom and she taught him so much about vietnamese food and culture, nick’s go-to “let me cook for you” food is homemade pho that he has down pat (and of course he lies and says it’s super complicated and hundreds of years of swift tradition)
- taylor swift is incredible at origami, he can make an origami gundam and also attempted the “1000 origami cranes” thing before he got bored and so cassandra just has like 200 origami cranes hung up around the house
- meryl streep owns his identity so hard during his time and he’s “rediscovered” in between the years of s1 and s2 in the name of inclusivity in the film world and immediately he is grant’s secret celebrity crush
- they mean the world to me
First AAPI HC's Post Here!
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joyboyish · 10 months
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oda doesnt know the strawhats like i do so heres what i think the strawhats jobs would be if they were in the real world
luffy - ok so he started off by doing odd jobs around the neighborhood (fixing pipes, gardening, etc) but he was so fucking bad at it, on a good day the thing he's fixing gets twice as bad, but he'll like... solve an issue in the family or beat up a kids bully and they'll still pay him, but one day he was working on a entomologists house (insect biologist) and he started info dumping about beetles and the guy was like "u should come w me to work" and he was like ok sweet and he gets a degree bc of a technicality and extra credit (being awesome), he kind of sucks at his job tho bc they'll be like "dr luffy what did you learn about this bug" and he'll either give them every detail imaginable or be like "lol it looks funny", all of the strawhats have been on little trips with him to study the bugs bc hes clingy and doesnt want to go alone. also he does mukbangs on youtube
zoro - he's a swordsmanship teacher at a university, but most of the time he just follows luffy around for his adventures and they spend the money on food (oda said he'd be a cop and that just doesnt make sense at ALL)
nami - she'd be a meteorologist (studies the weather), her, robin, and luffy (with zoro) will look around different places to find out the weather, different bugs, and the history of the area, luffy isnt at all helpful tho, also shes a tiktoker who makes GRWM's and records her and luffy (and any one else there) going on adventures, shes been cancelled once a week since the start of her career bc she keeps scamming people
usopp - he's a freelance artist! he does commissions and portraits of his friends, he also makes sculptors and stuff, hes a very versatile artist and has a lot of followers (got cancelled once for being friends with nami)
sanji - a chef... obviously... he has a three michelin star restaurant (the most u can get) that he took over from his foster dad zeff, hes not in contact with his birth father
chopper - reindeer
robin - an archeologist!!!! shes made many historical achievements and discoveries, got a nobel prize and was in the guinness book of world records for most artifacts donated to a museum
franky - carpenter/engineer, made an amazing machine and was considered the albert einstein of our time, tom is his mentor and he interned with vegapunk
brook - hes a faceless rock and roll musician, hes on the top 40 allll the time, he face revealed once and everyone was like "wdym hes 60.." (i know hes 90 but lets be realistic)
jinbe - a marine biologist! similarly to robin hes made the most discoveries in his field. hes the only marine biologist whos able to stay underwater for long periods of time and is super strong/tough skin so hes able to go deeper than most people
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chiiyuuvv · 11 months
Note
Hey~
I was wondering if you'd be able to write how xiker's members would react to y/n being insecure about being very chubby/ very slim (still healthy tho) to the point where y/n would want to change herself (but because she's insecure about how others see her and not because she really want's to) and how the boy's would comfort her, what they'd do etc.
You can choose whether you'd like to do it as a headcanon, imagine or anything else!
Thank you!💚🦊
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WHEN YOU THINK YOU'RE OVERWEIGHT
• PAIRING — bf!xikers x gn reader (uses some she)
• GENRE — comfort, fluff, i dont think i implied the angst, comfort, comfort, comfort
• WORD COUNT — 758
• AUTHOR'S NOTE — i am so, so, so sorry about the long wait. True was, me and my team had no idea what to write 😭 but after looking up some coping skills, we got to writing. I just wanna say that you are beautiful just the way you are, fuck other people. And if you dont believe me, xikers certainly will ♡
MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!
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MINJAE ☆
Minjae could see on your phone various workout methods that guarantees losing lots of weight in 2 weeks or so
Was a little confused on why you were so interested in that so he decided to comfort you
It broke his heart when you kept calling yourself fat and chubby bc what?? No you arent
And since he knew the workout methods and supplements were a scam, he suggested that you worked out with him
Praises every little thing you do with a big hug and kiss ♡
JUNMIN ☆
Junmin felt a little chubby when he was growing up so he understood how you felt
After researching, he found that setting small goals really helps your mental being
So he decided to do just that
This week, you should at least eat a apple everyday
Next week, you would go for a 30 minute walk
Does everything with you so you dont have to feel alone ♡
SUMIN ☆
He'd be all ears
Hes kinda like minjae too; his baby?? Feeling fat???
But would still let you rant everything out without him interrupting
Wipes away your tears if you start crying
And when you're done, he would go on a rant about how beautiful you are, and even though you dont feel this way right now, you will feel this way in the future ♡
JINSIK  ☆
As soon as you open up to him, hes gone
Then you hear a big crash
Throws away (stomps and slams) your bathroom scale
Along with anything else that triggers you
Then would go on a long rant about how you shouldnt compare yourself to others ♡
HYUNWOO ☆
You told him when you thought he was sleeping because it would be too hard telling him when hes awake
Immediately sits up when you fall asleep, his heart breaking as he rubs your back
And then bolts out of the bed
Spends the next 30 minutes placing sticky notes in random places for you to find, using affirmations like "youre so pretty" or "you are worth it"
And when you see it the next morning you almost break down, hyunwoo restating the note over and over ♡
JUNGHOON ☆
Junghoon feels like hes not good at using his words and would accidentally offend you
So he creates a playlist
You know those body worship songs like i love my body by hwasa or any meghan trainor song?
Hes got them all in one playlist for you to listen too
And he even sings along ♡
SEEUN ☆
Seeun knew you werent one for exercising, so why not some yunmy healthy food to eat?
He knows hes not the best at cooking but he will try
And if not he'd recruit another member
Wont force you to eat all the vegetables but once he does figure out what healthy foods you like to eat. Its over
For dessert, he would hand feed you some fresh fruits ♡
YUJUN ☆
"What, no you arent." Would be yujuns first words but he knows words dont matter actions do
So with lots of kisses, he would drag you to the bathroom
Makes up a self care plan for you to do everyday, teaching you to love your body just like how he loves you
Speaking of love, he looks at you with so much love in his eyes, you feel like melting
And if you let him, he would kiss every part of your body, and pressing extra ones in the places you feel insecure ♡
HUNTER ☆
We all know how hunter journals his emotions just when hes about to go to bed
And so he requests that you do the same
Writing down your feelings makes you feel more connected to yourself, and pinpoints how you started feeling this way
And just like yujun, if you let him, he would kiss all the places where you feel insecure
And cuddles you, whispering in your ear that you are so beautiful and you should not think of yourself that way. And even if you do, hunter would do everything in his power to change your mind ♡
YECHAN ☆
Yechan thought you were joking at first
But his smile immediately drops when he finds out that you werent
Yechan would spend the next few days talking about self acceptance. Making you talk out your feelings and acknowledge your abilities
Would give examples on how this relates to him too, like when he was younger, he thought his rap was terrible
But would reassure you that what youre feeling will not last forever, and that you will see some happier days ♡
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