#bcuz i know im gonna draw even more of it

[c10v3r]

do you guys like digital circusified lightbrush i think they kinda funny

[caitlinbueckers]

ok Ik you said Pazzi fic in studio but will never get the idea of Paige calling azzi mamas out of my head so just felt like I needed to share an idea for a blurb or to include in anything you write PAIGE CALLINF AZZI MAMAS

anon ur a genius but i am simply a fool who took this prompt and then ran with it and turned it into a random oneshot soooooo i apologize for the minimal use of ‘mamas’ but hope u like it anyway and will implement that in all my writing deadass

pet names.

paige bueckers/azzi fudd.

2.8K.

kinda bullshit rambling but a lil more of a structure to follow???

minimal nsfw so 18+ as fuck

Wait guys let me know how u rly feel bcuz im not suuuper happy w this one

at first, it’s a subtle change.

it’s not like paige is ever actually serious enough for her words to be taken to heart or with any ounce of meaning behind it— she’s a fucking idiot, and azzi was more than well aware of her incessant antics, and the fact that she just played too much.

so, of course it surprises her, but she can’t say it really means anything, until it does.

it’s funny to azzi, really, when recently, all of a sudden, paige will get caught up in her usual tangents that she’s started letting these random, little pet names slip from her lips, mouth moving so fast, almost as if she barely meant it, could barely even call it out herself.

it happens usually when they’re tired— or, at least when azzi’s tired, and paige is excited. sweat clinging to the back of azzi’s neck, her curls drawing up and away from the edges of her hairline, skin flushed and hot to the touch when paige is suddenly breezing past her. she’s somehow still in a jog despite the rigorous drills they’d done, oblivious to the redness of her face or the plastered strands of blonde hair against her forehead. she’s at the tail end of a conversation with KK, still grinning like a fool about whatever they must’ve been chattering about, yelling out some type of phrase or joke that only those two could conjur up.

azzi’s right eyebrow is already lifted, somehow already suspicious and unimpressed of her intentions when paige is launching straight into a new conversation, cheeks still pink and teeth on display as she skips backwards to keep her eyes on azzi.

“i think me an’ KK are ‘finna go play 2K when we get back to the dorms— i told her ass she doesn’t stand like, a single chance when I’ve been on my grind, and she don’t believe me, like, baby, you know i’ve been on that shit,” she clicks her tongue, rolls her eyes before she’s smacking azzi’s arm, giving her a sneaky grin, one that signaled whatever she was offering was really gonna be a delight, (it never was), “you should come chill. you don’t gotta play if you don’t want, you can always be my lil’ cheerleader.”

it wasn’t like her high energy, rapid movement behavior was anything unusual, but that little, barely missable word was.

baby. it rolls off her tongue like it’s been waiting around the whole time, lingering beneath the surface, waiting for the moment to strike. she says it with an ease of comfort she can’t necessarily place, and azzi doesn’t necessarily hate it, but it’s there, nonetheless.

it momentarily stunts her, but azzi still finds herself smiling— not from any type of fluster or flush miraculously, but one that she usually gives paige when she’s amused by her, eyes wide and exaggerated as she huffs out a chuckle. “that sounds… boring, honestly.” but, she’s laughing at the gape on paige’s face anywa, “i need to shower, dude, i don’t wanna watch video games.” she scoffs, before she grins at her, only because she knows it’ll piss paige off.

and it does, so, of course the walk out to the parking lot is filled with a whole lot of, ‘oh my god, bro, you’re so lame.’ or, ‘like, azzi, you can have a turn ‘forreal, like just come over for like, deadass a second.’

ultimately, and unsurprisingly enough, paige ends up getting her way. though, she’ll swear it’s only because azzi takes her shower, does some homework and is in the middle of taking out her braids when the word hits her again, and again, and again.

babybabybaby.

she can’t really blame the way she rolls her eyes despite herself. her and paige had been close for fucking ever, so there wasn’t necessarily much between them that was off limits, but it still resonated within her as something azzi couldn’t just brush off. whether that was more damaging than pretending it never happened, she didn’t have a single clue.

all she did know, was that paige bueckers got her way entirely way too much. so much so, that azzi has to let out an audible groan reserved only for paige, before she texts that she’s on her way over.

and yeah, whatever, maybe it wouldn’t matter so much if it was just a one-off, or if maybe their friendship wasn’t so fucking complicated in the first place.

but then, it does matter, because it doesn’t stop happening.

when paige is frustrated at her homework, sitting plainly with her legs at full extension in the study room with aaliyah, ice, and azzi, it leaves her lips in a huff of exasperation, “azzi, babe, this shit really makes no sense, swear.” even if she’s saying it in the voice that clearly states she hasn’t attempted it for nearly long enough to proclaim she doesn’t get it, “az, can you please just come check it out.” azzi can’t tell what’s worse; the fact that paige had said it, or the fact that nobody had even looked surprised that she did.

or when they’d gotten dressed for media day, everyone milling about as they try not to wrinkle their uniforms or crease their concealer, it’s paige (and eventually nika and aaliyah) that whoops and hollers during azzi’s solo pictures, something like, “yeaaaah princess! nation’s best, babyyyyy! work that shit!” followed by a series of whistles that sounded so off pitch it makes azzi snort, rolling her eyes as she purposely avoids the gaze that paige so obviously wants to capture, teetering at the edges of azzi’s peripheral with a grin so wide it threatens to make her blush.

and, she swears she doesn’t, and instead turns back to the photographer with cheeks only a touch pinker than they were previously, “sorry— can we do that again?”

really, the only time she’d ever allowed herself to actually enjoy it, was on the last night at the hotel after a game. it couldn’t have been later than two or three in the morning, paige and azzi having spent the majority of it whispering beneath the covers, anything to not wake up the two other girls asleep in the other double bed.

it’s not too bad, having to share beds— except that, paige is a chronic cuddler and azzi would rather sleep on the shitty futon than be subjected to paige’s unrelenting weight against her back, or her arms slung lazily over her, but it was because of that precise position that azzi could even hear the words when she says it.

“mmmh-,“ she hums tiredly first, speaking mostly out of her ass, like paige always did when got too tired and let herself start rambling “night, pretty girl.”

it’s soft, and sort of raspy— the way paige gets when she’s been screaming all night on the court, and azzi can really only tell by the amount of ibuprofen that she’d downed before bed being somewhat more than her usual, that she’s probably got a headache. it’s a voice she uses when she’s being sincere.

the quiet sentiment, however insignificant to anyone else, replays in her mind. almost like a secret. almost like the closer she keeps it to her chest, the harder it’ll be to lose it.

it makes her whole body warm all over.

her response comes a few beats later, when she’s sure paige has drifted, and nothing but her measured breath is puffing against azzi’s neck, heard only between the two of them.

“night, p.”

but then, suddenly, everything sort of changes. azzi doesn’t know when this part happened— maybe it’s between the time she kisses her at that bar, tipsy and too close, unaware of the camera that set the internet aflame, and now, where it was customary that paige did homework with her, or ate dinner with her or slept over all the time. perhaps, it’s one selective moment in the chaos between that had suddenly transformed paige’s subtle casualty of the pet names, to something more intimate. more for them, rather for anyone else.

or, maybe it was exactly where they knew they’d end up all along.

it’s after a night out, after neither of them had ever really questioned how this had became their routine. that now, it had become something unspoken, an inherent rule that was followed without it needing to be stated. that, when they got too fucked up with the team, and the ubers were being ordered, azzi and paige always went together, that the address would always end up being paige’s dorm, and that azzi would always be curling into purple sheets by the time she sobers up enough to sleep.

but, she’s not sober. she’s drunk, and her face is flushed hot, sticky with the bar atmosphere. “paige, you’re making me too hot.” azzi complains with an impatient lilt to her voice, lifting her right shoulder up to her neck as if to shrug paige off, but the girl is relentless, humming her denial as she slid a hand across azzi’s thigh, grasping it hard enough that her nails dug into the skin there.

“psh, you’re already hot, shut up.” the words are spoken clumsily, lips brushing against the bare skin of azzi’s shoulder with each word, while a sudden surge of annoyance and somehow gratitude courses through azzi for having worn a sleeveless top, “c’mere, mamas, ‘lemme lay on you.”

she’s being whiny, and it only makes azzi roll her eyes before her gaze flickers to the screen of the car, giving her another light elbow prod, only this time, a short, sneaking smile is crossing her face. “paige, ‘forreal, we’re about to be back anyway.”

this, somehow, only fuels her. “i’m wounded,” she complains, before she’s pressing a little smack of a kiss to azzi’s neck, “my girl’s so mean to me, shit.”

my girl.

what the fuck ever.

azzi should’ve demanded an explanation then, but she doesn’t.

in fact, there’s not an explanation waiting for them when they stumble into paige’s room, their hands in a tight grasp, pulling each other in so that they can both fall against the bed, and azzi really shouldn’t have been expecting one. it’s definitely not explained when they’re somehow under the blankets, and paige has an arm, long and lean, wrapped around azzi’s waist to end somewhere between her legs, fingers finding a rhythm that seems to pull the very air from azzi’s lungs.

it’s not what azzi was expecting to happen, and yet somehow they’d fallen into place like it something they’d done a million times. paige had undressed her, after azzi’s complaint of still feeling too hot, and paige— not even a singular bit sober— finds her hands along the bottom of azzi’s top, tugging it over her head before she tosses her an old basketball camp shirt that had been slung across her dresser.

“you gonna sleep in jeans?” is really what had started it, paige’s pointed tone making azzi’s face burn hot, but the smirk on her face never faltered. “you’re so annoying.”

because then, paige has her fingers hooking into azzi’s waistband, eliciting a string of giggles that escape because fuck, she’s ticklish and paige knows. “what? what am i doing?” the blonde is grinning too, snickering under her breath as azzi’s pants are yanked down her hips, kicked from her feet with minimal effort until azzi feels it. a featherlight kiss was placed to each of her scarred knees, the inside of her thigh, eyes flickering up to azzi’s hazy but steady gaze, “this okay?”

god, azzi hadn’t realized until just then how fucking okay it was.

it’s quiet, sensual even, the way that paige talks her through it— heel of her hand dragging endlessly against her swollen clit, fingers thick as they arched into her, teeth grazing the back of azzi’s shoulder with each word of encouragement.

“c’mon, mamas, jus’ like that.” had anyone known better, they’d think paige must’ve been getting off just to this, by the way her own voice hitched and caught, her own hard swallows that reverberated in azzi’s ear, each laced with little gasps as she plunged into her wetness.

but, azzi did know better— paige was absolutely getting off to it. her voice is all breath, crackling and barely audible, murmuring incoherent mumbles that make it almost incomprehensible to decipher, yet, azzi swears she can understand.

it’s in her ear, over and over, that heat and pressure between her legs building as her hips twitched involuntarily against her knuckles, feels the way they slide deeper within her and azzi lets out a noise that even she’s too embarrassed to recount. “fuck, i wanna hear that shit, need to hear you baby, please.”

it coaxes the orgasm straight from azzi’s core, thighs involuntarily squeezing around paige’s hands, to which the blonde is silent in muted awe. she watches with bleary eyes but bated breath, sitting up only a bit to really witness it. the way azzi’s face drew up, eyebrows furrowed and lips parting, the whimper edged breaths that huffed out of her, the tight clamping of her eyes shut.

“so fucking pretty,” each word is punctuated in a kiss, “so good.”

really, it should’ve been a lot worse for them the next morning. azzi can’t help the wave of a ground shaking realization she gets when she rolls over to inspect paige’s sleeping expression, lips slightly parted, her blonde hair mussed on the pillow behind her. there should’ve been some type of lingering awkwardness that hung above them, some type of trepidation or fear, maybe even regret.

it definitely wasn’t like they talked about it, but they’d also never quite gone this far. did they need to? probably, because azzi knew that the guilt would probably hit sooner or later.

in fact, azzi waits for it to hit, all the way until paige wakes up, and her eyes are a little puffy, watery blue and clear as she blinks up blearily at azzi like she’s the finest thing she’s ever laid eyes on (because she is), and whispers with a grin, “distracted by my beauty?”

she waits even until the next away game, when her legs are propped up over paige’s lap and her fingers are drumming absently against azzi’s thigh, humming something in her headphones with her eyes shut, looking like a complete idiot, before their eyes meet by chance when paige opens them, and suddenly, they’re both grinning.

she even waits for it to hit when the buzzer goes off after the fourth quarter of that game, an easy win, and confetti is thrown. it’s chaos really, with all the girls rushing through the tunnel to get back to the lockers. that is, until, paige pulls her aside for half a second, hidden away from the hungry eyes to press a solid, sweet kiss to her lips.

but it doesn’t end there. azzi waits for it during her injury, when enough nights in linoleum covered white floors with the constant smell of antiseptic start to pierce the inside of azzi’s brain, ruins her attitude enough that paige’s texts go unanswered. and yet, everytime azzi wakes up, the pain in her leg flared and angry, it’s paige that’s sat in the corner of the room, huddled under a shitty hospital blanket, waiting for her to wake up.

it went even as far as the loss against IOWA when the roles are reversed— after the excitement of final four had became real, after the grueling, rampant preparation, and then ultimately, a loss. it’s when azzi gets permission to stick around in paige’s hotel room until she gets back from the game, and the way that the blonde, finally in the safety of the four walls, found herself crumbling to azzi, becoming nothing but a shell of what everyone perceives her to be, everything paige wishes she fucking wasn’t.

it’s only then, that azzi finds herself returning the favor— arms wrapped tight around paige’s waist with a burning, sting in her own eyes that she can feel the moment she sighs against the crown of paige’s head. she can smell the sweat, the smell of a basketball court that had just gotten waxed, but really, azzi just smells paige, and that’s enough to give her the composure she needs to whisper against her head, “don’t be so hard on yourself, baby… you guys did so good.”

and they don’t talk about it, because they don’t need to. the same way they never had to ask the other when it came to the hospital or bus rides or homework dates or hotel rooms— it was unspoken, implied but never mentioned. the same way back when they’d met at USA camp, it was never a matter of conversation for their plays to work, it was all in the matter of a look, or a slight of hand.

and when the team starts asking, giving paige shit about how she’s missing video game nights with KK or azzi’s getting shit about caroline missing her study partner, everybody already knows. when paige tells nika, voice only a little timid as she gives her a condensed version of the last few months like it was a ground shaking news, head tilted to lean on the older girls shoulder, the brunette bursts into laughter. ‘finally, took you guys long enough.’

and really, it was a wonder they hadn’t been like this the whole time.

a wonder that it had taken this long in the first place.

[honeytonedhottie]

so you're my only hope and i really wish for your advice. it's humiliating to say my story but i really need help. so i was misdiagnosed with schizofrenia (i 100% know i'm healthy) i need to lie that i have schizofrenia because my mother needs money. and here comes my desires : revision and desired age/grade level and maaany more. i have no responsibilities literally zero! the way i manifest is i walk around my room and viseualise, affirm and overall manifest which is fun but the thing is do you think i should build healthy day routine instead of just pacing around my room all day long? could you provide me a routine? thank you for help because yall are saving me for real. it could be even self care habits to do every day anything to avoid pacing around

thank you for coming to me 💗 and im so sorry about ur story. im so happy that you know the law because you deserve all of ur desires and more!! 💗

so to build a healthy routine and schedule for urself. doing so builds discipline. im gonna give u some healthy habits, a morning and evening routine, and resources for those things. a good place to start tho is making a weekly agenda that changes with the week, something to switch things up every week. just make one 💗💗💗

—healthy habits🩰⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡ moving ur body/pilates - i personally do pilates and i recommend it to literally everybody. but the basic idea is to move around (and that does not mean pacing in ur bedroom) i mean get ur blood flowing and get moving. it doesn’t have to be pilates it can be running, a sport, dancing, yoga etc

here’s a link to one of the pilates workouts that i recommend if ur a beginner : 

♡ get a hobby - some hobby recommendations: if u are good at writing try poetry, try teaching urself how to draw or paint or sculpt, learn how to dance, learn how to play an instrument, learn a sport, learn languages, become a good cook, write stories, start a blog, learn to sew or crotchet, learn tech, read lots of books, watch/listen to lots of podcasts. literally just get busy 

♡ meditating and journaling - this is so good not only for ur mental health but it can also improve focus and keep u grounded. keep a journal or start meditating every day

here’s a link to a guided meditation for self love : 

♡ self care - i LOVE self care. literally practice self care every single day. take care of ur nails, skin, hair, lashes EVERYTHING. be super intentional with ur self care bcuz it tells our brains that we are worthy of effort and it’ll LITERALLY make u feel like a princess. 

♡ manifesting - you mentioned that u wanted to do some revision so something that i recommend for revising is using SATS. or state akin to sleep. once ur in state akin to sleep go back in ur mind and revise whatever u want. or just do SATS before bed every night. this is such a powerful manifesting tool

♡ sleep - aim to get between eight to ten hours of sleep a night. you’ll look better, feel better, and your physical and mental health will just skyrocket 

—morning🌸⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡̴ first thing in the morning, fix ur bed 

♡ open the blinds/windows if the sun is out, this all depends on what time u wake up but if the sun isn’t out just skip this step 

♡ stretch for a couple minutes 

♡ write down at least three things that ur grateful for (don’t write down what u aren’t grateful for AT THAT MOMENT, literally just write down three things that ur grateful for right then and there) 

♡ brush ur teeth and use a tongue scraper 

♡ have a glass of water with some lemon slices 

♡ take a warm shower and moisturize 

♡ skincare routine 

♡ put on an outfit that makes u feel pretty 

♡ if u get nauseous when u eat breakfast then try eating something light, but if that doesn’t work then listen to ur body and just skip breakfast. if that’s not the case tho eat a balanced breakfast 

THEN GET TO WORK ON YOUR AGENDA THAT I MENTIONED IN THE BEGINNING<3 

—evening🍥⊹ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ♡̴ ⋆⁺₊⋆

♡ take a warm shower and moisturize 

♡ 30-60 minutes of self care and pampering 

♡ make a yummy dinner that’s nourishing 

♡ read for 20 minutes or watch something that enriches u 

♡ evening yoga 

♡ drink water 15 minutes before bed 

THEN GO TO SLEEP AND HAVE SWEET DREAMS <3 

this is just an idea, or a basic guideline to follow if u need it. customize it to ur specific needs and day-to-day life. im so excited for all ur desires to manifest cuz u deserve it! mwah 💗💗💗

[lxmine]

I really liked your itto hc, can I request one more?

We know how well he's clothed in the game so the reader can't help but keep staring at his chest and eventually reaching out to touch it. They feel him up a little before realising what they're doing and promptly remove their hand. I'd really like to know how you think he would react.

Thank you for indulging our requests and working so hard on them.💪

❝i know i shouldn’t but….❞ + itto, capitano, dottore x gn!reader

+. Crackfic kinda?, big honkers, slight suggestive,, lower cased letters

+. Summary : them reacting to you wanting to touch/touching their broad chest :p

+. A/N THIS OMG T-T im surprised but HELL YES HEBEIDBEJDBI i added capitano and dottore bcuz why not >:) and im having writers block rn and i tried my best to post pls forgive me for this ugly ass writing T-T AND IM SORRY BUT I GOT CARRIED AWAY AT CAPITANO’S

itto

it’s raining pretty heavily outside, and you’re laying in bed with your beloved oni who’s rambling about this and that.

he’s half bare, it’s cold yet he doesn’t really mind. he looks and observes you as he talked.

a grin then creeps up to his face seeing that you’re looking at his chest and your hand that was resting on his waist was now on his chest feelings him up.

“sigh, my chest is that distracting huh?” realizing what he meant and said, you quickly took your hands off him and covered your face with the blanket.

“shush! you just looked comfy is all.” he chuckles and scoots closer to embrace you, you’ve hugged him many times before but you’ll always find his chest so damn comfortable.

“don’t get shy on me now, i know how much you love to cuddle onto me.” he pulls the blanket down to pamper you with kisses. “go on, i’ll be your personal pillow for the rest of your life baby.” he smirks pulling you even more closer to him.

“stop that, you’re embarrassing me!” you chuckled burying your face into his chest while he laughed and caressed your hair at the same time. “let’s just take a nap.”

capitano

he’s working on his piled up desk while you sat beside him doing some of his easy paper work he forced you to because he doesn’t want you to annoy him while he worked

you were getting hella bored, his office have nothing interesting in them so you just stared at the masked man who is too focused to even spare a glance at you.

“did i allow you to stop?” he sighs as he continued to sign papers, you only responded with a grumble and stood up to grab a treat. “do you maybe want coffee?”

he humms in response and so you quickly went out to take some.

coming back with a lollipop in mouth and hot coffee in hand. you noticed his coat is now off and is lying on his couch near his desk.

skipping over to him “careful, don’t want you spilling that thing on you.” he says still not averting his eyes from his papers not like you can see his eyes but you get what i mean

“damn, i wouldn’t mind working with you if you looked like that everyday.” you said sarcastically, taking your seat beside him and placing his coffee next to him and he only scoffed.

he then took his mask off while you admired him as he took a sip of his coffee. he looked so……….. so hot. the outline of his chest is visible through his black turtle neck and his stern expression draw you into him more

“get to work, thought you wanted to eat dinner out tonight. help me finish these, faster.” he ordered giving you a small glare. a small blush creeping up to your face while you looked up to him and his chest

“w-well if you want me to work for hours, i need motivation you know…!” you said crassly teasing him, but he didn’t look to happy about that (when did he ever?)

“if you wish to touch my chest then you must finish at least a dozen of these, do we have a deal?” he offers, grabbing your pen to start writing

“yes, sir!”

dottore

“nah, how the hell is that even gonna work?”, “you seriously think that’s gonna work?”, “i just know that’s not gonna work.” and more of your annoying comments about the ruin he’s experimenting on repeated.

you love annoying the living shit out of him just so he could do what you want so you wouldn’t annoy him. he groaned glaring at you, who is sitting at his couch.

“zandik.” you called and received no response, only the sound of grinding metals are heard.

“zandik..” “…” “zandik!” “…” “zandik, zandik, dottore, dott-“ “IN THE NAME OF THE TSARITSA, WHAT IS IT!?”

“it’s warm, can you take your coat off already?” you said standing up from the couch to grab some candies from your candy jar that he kept in his lab for you they’re totally not poisoned or filled with some weird medicine

he gave you a look before rolling his eyes and taking his coat off along with his mask. “if you wanted to see my chest, you could’ve just asked, you insolent brat.” he then throws his coat at you and genstures you to come closer to him. “now would you be so kind and tie my hair for me, love?” he smirks and kisses your cheeks. “sure, sure! as long as you’re gonna come home with me tonight so we can cuddle.” you winked.

he sighed, he rarely comes home because of his piled work and experiments but he guesses he can make exceptions for you.

was twirling my hair and swinging my feet while writing this LMAO and i just turned 15 back in october 30th yay!!! anyway, here ya go. i apologize for not posting in so long i ws busy grinding my ass off for scaramouche cuz i couldn’t help myself and wished for nilou LMAO and just so u guys know my requests are open and you’re free to request fics or hcs you want! just not nsfw/smut ones. anyway stay safe and hydrated, take care of your mental and physical health I LOVE YOU <3

MASTERLIST

[driedupeyeballs]

OH MY GOD???? I already love them sm

I literally edited a new profile for them for this cuz the old one was outdated BUT YEAH IDK IF THIS WAS AN INVITE TO INFODUMP ABT MY JAMIAZU FANKID BUT IM USING IT AS ONE

Btw I can only wish to achieve your level of snake knowledge I thought my reptile hyperfixation went deep but yours is deeper I wanna know your ways

But that isn’t relavent YEAH HERES MY JAMIAZU FANKID HI TUMBLR *lets them out like you would a spider under a cup*

So I have a shit ton of Twst fankids btw! They kinda swim around in my brain but only a few ppl I know have gotten the info dumps lmao

Skye was the first one I made I think (actually it might’ve been Rico (florid) but eh oh well who’s counting)

But yes this is Skye Ashengrotto!

They’re my older Jamiazu kid, I do have two. The younger one is my octo boy Akram :) he’s funny I wanna pinch his cheeks but he’s not the point here

So Skye! It feels weird publically infodumping abt my OCs like wtf am I even supposed to put here

They’re a half mer, which do work a lil different than normal mers in my lore. Half mers can transform without a potion but it’s still a long and generally painful process, esp going from mer to human. I kind of switch between calling them a snake mer and a naga but there’s lore there- Nagas exist in my lore outside of sea snake mers, there are also fully terrestrial Nagas. So the terrestrial nagas wouldn’t be considered snake mers but the sea snake nagas would be a type of mer while also still being a naga ITS CONFUSING DONT ASK (actually do. Ask everything so I can roll more of my fankids out like marbles)

Skye was created by a spell, I haven’t quite worked the details out 😔 but Jamil is part gorgon in my lore which is why they have the hair snakes which isn’t a typical naga trait. And to elaborate on the hair snakes: they are alive, the one w the bigger stripes is Flora and the smaller stripes is Jett. Skye can communicate w them telepathically and their eyes glow which is kinda neat. They’re kind of Skye’s version of floatsam and jetsam (unless u count Rico (florid) and Lilac (treyjade) which is like their ver of the twins- IDK ITS COMPLICATED)

idk what else to put here so LETS THROW SOME FHARACTER DYNAMICS YEAH and also mentioning some of my other fankids! They all have profiles (except my Malleus kid I’m sorry Aihan I can’t think of a design for you) but I’m probably gonna save those for another post-

So jamiazu in my lore live in the Shaftlands in a beachfront place and also live pretty close to Treyjade, however Florid live in the Queendom. The octatrio and their spouses is a close group so they’re essentially a big family. My treyjade kids are Maren (older) and Lilac, then my Florid kids are Rico (older) and the twins Mary and Eliza.

Skye saw Lilac more as a kid cuz they lived so close together but also saw Rico a lot when flrd would visit or they’d go to visit them. Rico is an agent of chaos and Lilac is Skye’s 2nd in command so their dynamic on a surface level is pretty similar to the octatrio, but there’s still a lot of differences once u get into the meat of it. Tho Lilac and Rico are Skye’s best friends and basically like siblings to them.

Outside of jamiazu Skye is particularly close with Jade, they share a love of tea :) he’s their cool but also slightly unsettling uncle

THEN THERES SHENZI- Shenzi is my younger kaliruggie kid and I am not gonna get into her here bcuz she rlly needs her own post w all her trauma but good lord these two do not like each other. Shenzi’s really nice but she’s not quite as nice as Kalim so after about 5 months of trying and failing to befriend Skye in their freshman year she just gave up and now their relationship is nothing but hostile (which was not helped when Shenzi and lilac started dating)

Speaking of that tho- so my idikei kids :) Ember (named after the pokemon attack) is the older one and he’s basically that “Jock idia can’t hurt you he’s not real Jock idia:” thing as a person he has the Fire hair n shit but he plays basketball and is heavily extroverted but no one gives a shit abt Ember this is NOT ABT HIM this is abt his sister! Her name is Zelda because you know Idia would name his daughter Zelda- she got all of Idia’s social anxiety lmao. She’s extremely shy and there’s a total of like 4 people in the school she can actually talk to without melting into a small stain on the floor. She’s an Skye are both in board games club and sometime in early freshman year she falls on her ass and knocks over a bunch of stuff which Skye happens to witness and cue the most awkward interaction known to man bcuz Skye can’t talk to pretty girls and Zelda can’t talk to ANYONE but they end up walking to the mirror hall together afterwards which becomes a routine. Except they’re both awkward as fuck take like almost two fucking years to get together bcuz neither of them are gonna do anything abt it BUT THEYRE VERY CUTE!! I love them

Also my ashengrotto siblings are very wholesome I need to write some stuff w them- Akram is a little shit and he loves pissing Skye off but at the end of the day he admires them and Skye loves their brother a lot :)

Anyway good lord I’ve yapped too much okay OH YEAH Skye has a Russian blue cat named Mariana who they just fucking found on the side of the road and thought it was a mouse so for like 2 years Azul thought Skye was gonna eat the cat

OK HERES RHE ACTUAL PROFILE these aren’t as chaotic as the other ones all the other ones are more meme than profile ALSO RHEIR UNIQUE MAGIC DOESNR HAVE A NAME AT THE MOMENT IF ANHONE HAS AN IDEA FOR ONE PLS SHARE I HABE NO THOUGHTS

(If you recognize my art style from instagram no you don’t also THEY DO HABE EYES I JUST DONT DRAW THEM CUZ MY STYLES WEIRD)

But yeah I love them I hope they explode (affectionate)

[burgycreeper405-blog]

another long messy rant talk cuz I'm still angery

y'know what's funny

the way some people are calling me out on twitter is 'bcuz i ship Rexmet and Microknife'

their reason? stupid chet like "they're siblings" or "it's selfcest(for rexmet)" or sumchet like that

but when you think about it, it's stupid, cuz like,

(excuse for my messy explanation)

1.)

Rex and Emmet aren't really brothers, they're more like an AU character, (which is Rex or if you really think about it, it's tlm2 Emmet who's the AU one cuz like, Rex is the Emmet in the 1st movie and he went back in time to change the timeline lol), interacted with the canon character so they're like, AU x canon or AU x AU but they canonically interacted lol

even if i also see them as brothers, i know that they're not really brothers at the end of the day, they're just past version and future version interacted

same with Mic and Knife,

they be headcanoning that those two are siblings and/or even related by blood when they're no where near being related to each other,,

no, VA does not equal to the character they're voicing

cuz the va of knife and mic are siblings, (including soap and salt & pepper (if you don't know, they're 4 siblings, yes, i did research aka read the credits and ii characters wiki and chet)

(VA ≠ character),

just cuz they're both gray colors? and metal?? then why not add nickel to that sibling hc then and not ship them with knife, bet you won't

and then they get mad at someone who doesn't see them as siblings when it's not even canon that they're siblings, it's all just headcanons

AND they didn't even make sure if Justin (the VA of Knife and co director of II) is still okay with it or not,

a friend of mine has to ask them about it and guess what, this is gonna be mind blowing to y'all,

he doesn't even mind it anymore

2.)

I have been saying this ever since i started watching/drawing the Lego movie, I'm neutral with any ship

I'm fine with Rex x Emmet

im neutral with it

(i both ship them and see them as siblings but not at the same friking time obviously, sheesh)

cuz like, i have most of my AUs with them as brothers lol

i honestly mostly ship them cuz its funny and chet,

3.)

theyre not even canonically siblings like they make out to be, it's all just hcs and chet

4.)

(this one is mostly aiming at the osc twitter but some of the tlm fandom as well)

they be saying that Rexmet is bad cuz Rex manipulated Emmet, like T4€0m!€ isn't like that but more worse

wanna know didly darn why?

well, first off, it’s just so weird how theyre fine with T4€0m!€ but not Taco x Pickle or Rexmet lol

and T4€0m!€ is much more worse than those two cuz like, if you've watched ii, we have seen how Mic is so hurt, like bro, did we watch the same thing or nah? cuz like, most of yall osc just not acknowledge that, like, y'all don't like Pickle x Taco but you like Taco x Mic????

with Rex and Emmet, Emmet wants Rex to be happy and chet at the end,

Pickle and Taco, eh, but he kinds misses her, but mostly just s1/“before her real self reveal” her so yeah,

T4€0m!€ is mmm, kinda troubling cuz like Mic doesnt want anything to do with Taco, yet the osc just puts that info away in the trash

and its the fact that Taco just uses her to get the money,

Rex wants Emmet to not want what happened to him or something,

big difference there

Rex wants to help Emmet

Taco wants to help herself

Taco manipulated Mic for her own selfish deeds (aka "helping her to win the competition to get the money for herself") and Taco knows that,

Rex manipulated Emmet to not get him hurt (but backfired cuz what he's doing also hurts Emmet but he doesn't realized that until the end, what 5 years of being alone does to ya lol),,

well, both backfired

but atleast Emmet wants to help Rex get a second chance if it werent for back to the futuring,

Mic just wants Taco to not be in her life anymore

yet the osc on twitter be like "aww these two are so cute together",

like Mic didn't say "I thought I gained a friend, turns out, I gained nothing"

like that isn't clear enough that Mic doesn't want anything to do with Taco after that

5.)

"it's selfcest" (for rexmet)

yeah, so you must've hate au character x au character then, AND you must've hate yourself then, let me say this to you

shut up, you're just projecting

i have more words to say for this but that reason for why rex and emmet is bad is just so stupid that my brain just doesn't want to,,

selfcest ≠ incest

6.)

they're just Lego Minifigures and a knife and a microphone,

y'all fr acting like it's gonna be the end of the world or something if we ship them,

they're all canonically adults, not related to each other (rex and emmet are basically like, clones or like, au x canon or au x au or somethin like that) and they're not even problematic as they say they are

aight, that's the end of my rant,

there may be more in the future but yeah, I am in my hater arc/hj

[0wllight]

HI MINHO!!! i am so sorry youve been feeling bad today i hope it gets even the littlest better soon

in the meantime i brought this sketch of venom i made!!!! i know he would take such good care of you rn

i wanted to do some cool ✨ dynamic pose with him but then his hair/headpiece thing was way more confusing to draw than expected lol so i thought itd be easier to draw bigger and i was right

also btw guilty gear seems so interesting to me but i just have never gotten around to playing it </3 but if you ever wanna talk about it and/or venom with someone i would gladly listen !!

hope this message could distract you and/or cheer you up a bit, im sending you so much love <3 (@operettaofbeginnings)

WAAAGH IM CONGRALGKWEMKMWALKMGEWKLMKLWAMLEKMGWELAMEKEWA SOBS THAN YOU SO MUCH??? GONNA CRY AWUGH...... (/pos) THIS IS SO GOOD AUGHHHH. SOBS. ALSO YES OFC I CAN TOTALLY TALK TO YOU ABOUT IT!! i'll dm you in the morning!!! AND THANK YOU!! I was gonna go to sleep soonish actually bcuz i think it might help with distracting too but this is a great thing to see bfore i go to bed :'D

WAAAAAAUGH

[vvh0adie]

Aaahhh 💖 I love youuu 💖 how have you been doing? How's drawing and writing going? Did I miss any new updates btw? 😭

lil big life update ig🙃

WRITER LIFE:

i released Strawberry Kisses which is a cute yoongi fic. some mutual masturbation and miscommunication trope👀 its my most liked fic atm. theres even a drabble for this couple.

i’ve been working on a hobi period sex fic thats already 13k for the 1st part, so its a long series🌚

thinking about doing a drug dealer hobi x stripper reader wip. i already have too many wips. and i wanted to do another hopekook series🤦🏽‍♀️

also working on illumi zoldyck fic after starting a rewatch of hxh (1 of my fav animes). two in the works: one with just illumi and another with illumi/machi/shizuku/reader😭 a fourple?

thinking about BTS blog hiatus so i can focus on KCG bc ppl are asking about my All of Us Are Dead fic. so i need to write the second chapter to that.

[more personal below | tw: race relations]

MINOR PERSONAL LIFE:

need to practice driving😐 my bitch ass is 20yrs and cant drive. im a lil scared no lie bcuz memphis drivers are wild😭 i gotta get my license by november or i have to take the permit test over again😰

im finally starting to do technical labs for biotech/forensics🎉 one step closer to my internship!

a little behind on criminal investigation😞

im a little scared how chemistry 2 is gonna go this year. i dont know whats going on😦 im so lost😭

i started my laptop but never opened clip studio😭 i really wanna draw hobi tho. and i need to make stuff for my shop that i really wanna open. i need motivation😞

thinking about learning to code😭 it seems easy; just a lot of words. i wanna design websites. maybe some BT21 themed. now javascript kinda scares me.

MAJOR PERSONAL LIFE:

overall im doing aight so far this year. could be better i think

ive only cried twice this month😀 having some self-image/identity issues and managing to keep my sanity in check with Black History Month after that police brutality murder here in memphis and Ron Desantis bullying the College Board into turning AP Black History into a whitewashed history and Black Conservatism. i feel too hyperaware of the fuckery that is america. it feels like me and every other black person are the only ones really seeing this shit. its tiring and makes me harbor a different kind of hate in my heart for the concept of whiteness that i didnt even know was there. its somewhat hard to see people’s humanity or feel safe around them. i hate to even say this, but since something major happened january, maybe nothing will happen this summer unlike May 2020. im trying to take it one day at a time tho... hehe

you probably weren’t expecting all that but i figured id turn this into a general post😭 sorry if this was too much, even the non heavy stuff. i know when people ask how someones doing they’re prolly asking for something simple but this feels more like a diary entry than anything.

but thanks for asking, not many people do💖 i hope everyone has a kinder year

[wildernessuntothemselves]

after reading the bee chapter i think oc will go back to gyu , i got soft for tyun this chapter but im still team gyu

and yeah I realized how most of ppl ignored the fact that murder is a crime u r literally taking the other person’s life!! but they draw the line on rape so if we wanna talk abt who’s awful tyun is the one cuz he killed a lot of ppl and that’s my point of view and the most rational thing that someone could realise * and im not saying that rape isn’t a crime it is an awful one* but gyu did this just one time and he felt guilty for it every single day after losing oc and he didn’t do it bcuz he’s a horny ass bitch he did it bcuz he was stupid and childish thinking it would make him keep oc , unlike tyun who has been killing since forever

still love tyun but i would rather go back to gyu

anyways the scene i wanna have in next chapter is the same one that ive sent it to u and u didn’t post it cuz it was already gonna be there , but the other scene is gyu giving oc a what she wants after teasing her cuz he’s desperate too and missed u so bad

i think people forgive tyun for killing because it's justified. like jaeyun is a traitor and in most countries that is punishable by death. my problem with the execution was the public spectacle of it and him making kai do it even though 1) he's not qualified and has never done it, and 2) that's literally his best friend and it's super fucked up to force him to hack his head off. that's what i feel like people are overlooking because they like him and feel bad for him. all the killings he's ordered has been justified (except maybe for the guards in the beach scene but again that's a necessary casualty)

killing can be justified but rape can't because you can kill someone for the right reasons but there is no right reason to rape someone. it was purely for a selfish reason on gyu's part. even if he didn't do it for pleasure, he still enjoyed it in the moment and he did it to force her to stay. so i get why people don't forgive him. i don't as well even though i'm rooting for him lol confusing i know but again this is only in a fictional capacity

also i feel like rape incites more of an emotional reaction from people than even killing? also also because the rape happened to "us" while the killing happened to unimportant characters. don't forget that gyu also killed people

anywaaaaay i was just explaining why people hate gyu while they love tyun. i personally love both but i favor gyu like you

[orphic-exe-archived]

(SRRY THIS IS A LOT LONGER THAN I EXPECTED IT TO BE WHEN WRITING. TAKE UR TIME ) (Taking “ask as many questions as you like” and running with it /silly) same anon from before again again. idk kind of rant incoming bcuz i don’t much much of anywhere else to! im sort of questioning being plural but with a big question mark there bcuz it could honestly just be my gender changing too much and the identity crisis 💔 and i feel like for every symptom i have there’s at least 2 more i dont. my gender fluctuates enough already but sometimes specific genders or pronouns seem to come with certain name preferences and moods (to which I’ve always referred to as different “vibes” because that’s the only way i figured to describe things). but each of these sort of “vibes” have started to actually feel like different ppl and ive started to mess around with acknowledging them separately and it does feel nice. im also realizing that even though i don’t hear any distinct voices or anything in my mind, when i think to myself it’s more of actual back and forth conversation than is normal from what ive asked some friends? i never have amnesia at all (other than the usual forgetfulness i have which is very minor) but sometimes ill do things that don’t feel like. myself? like ill forget I drew/posted/wrote something for a bit but when I see it again i remember. and I know i did it, I was there, doing it, even though i feel like it wasn’t me. and not like im not in control of my body when I do it either cuz I very much remember doing it i just dont see why or what my thought process was. i have a whiteboard in my room where I’ve started making doodles of whatever feels like “myself” at any certain time and they’re all kind of similar but still feel like distinct. ppl. and again i physically remember drawing the other ones but it’s still weird. but most of this is just me I guess, because I don’t think i ever act particularly different online or irl around other ppl, it’s always just things i observe when im alone. i also know i have problems with symptoms of things I think I might have only appearing after I overthink it but maybeeeeeee it’s just im noticing it more? probably not. oh also before I forget I’ve also never actually dissociated or anything (at least to my understanding of an out of body experience type of thing. (Well actually I did once and remember it very clearly but that was several years ago when I hadn’t slept for much longer than usual)). its just normal zoning out for me i guess. anyways idk where i was rlly going with this and ik everyone’s experiences r different and obviously strangers on the internet can’t diagnose me with anything but I just wanted to say something ^-^ thank u for reading if u did lol

hey man! i can get that it’s stressful to figure all this out. if it helps, our experiences are pretty similar! our syscovery started with name preferences, feeling really different, and pronoun/gender identity preferences fluctuating. it sounds to me like you could very well be plural!

like you said, i can’t diagnose you with anything. however, there are some ways to try and log your headmates/alters/parts (whatever you’d prefer them called)! for example, the website simplyplural (we don’t use but many systems do) or the pluralkit bot on discord (if you use discord!) these softwares can do things like track your switches, log your headmates with names, pronouns, and descriptions, and more.

there’s no harm in giving those helpful resources a try, especially if you’re seriously considering this possibility. if you have a therapist/some form of professional help, it would be really good to bring these feelings up with them as well.

for now, keep doing what you’re already doing, possibly dabble in simplyplural or pluralkit (or another resource i didn’t list — any notes app could work as well)

i’m gonna start calling you “system questioning anon” in case you have any more questions to send me, as long as you don’t mind!

i also have to apologize— all three of these asks were answered by three different headmates (kumo, oliver, and myself (olly) in chronological order.)

[gavinsmg24]

Yes princess. It’s that time. That I ramble on and on with love bcuz of you 🥰. First off! No matter what it is that promoted you to post. Whether it was my loveliness. My silly. My lots of posts. Or maybe you just were going thru photos. Whether it was to show your love for me now or remember our good times together. No matter what. Thru all of it I know princess was showing her love for daddy! For us! 🥰 it was so unexpected. You always find ways to surprise me and make me smile! No matter how extreme the love is. I felt your heart, brain, and soul with that! I could feel my princesses warmth ☺️ see your cheeks balling up with a smile and bouncing up and down with joy. Acting all cute! Anyways! Before I begin. Once again. Thank you! And! Even tho you’d rather not be as direct with me anymore (which Im okay with! I like anything more than nothing. But nothing is always okay!) basically I’ve said it time and time again. Only do what keeps you safe. I wont push or demand (in a serious way) you to say or do anything! I’m just taking my blessings as they come ☺️ (your the blessing🥰) but! Also remember! Since your gone! Daddy’s allowed to be selfish too! Like! You’re mine! And always will be! Until your physically in my arms again this will do 🙈. I’m rambling! Long story short. I always say this so I dont upset! But hopefully your just giggling at your daddy (aside from you having to read this at different times prolly! Cuz I’m rambling! Ahhh! Done!! I love you! Rawr)

First pic! Just imagine this face :,0) in response to each page. The wrapping paper and movie tickets I’m sure those were packed away in the notebook when you moved. But still. Some part of you at some point kept them. And whether you have them now or just the pics or even if you get rid of all of it soon. You had some portion of us. Whether you wanted to. Meant to. Or if I just am still lingering amongst you spiritually. You wanted and did share what you had with me. And I can only imagine it was to make me happy. Or bring back memories. Or find a way to express your love for me in a way that worked. No matter the case. Not only did you show me love. You found something. So. Pure. And beautiful. You could’ve sent a pic of anything. And Related it to us. But. Something like this. Is so specific. So engraved into us. Even if the book goes away. Still. Your beautiful words. Your drawings. Your thought to keep certain things. I love you Hymie is all I can say. I know I shouldnt say that prolly. But I’ll delete when I wake from my nap. You just made me feel so much that a pet name just doesn’t do. Anyways! The tickets of movies was so sweet. And the wrapping paper /name tags from gifts. Was even sweeter 🥺

I’m rambling! Next! Edible instructions (or mostly. Maybe that’s all. Either way I’ll keep that for sure too!) even if this was sent just to actually make edibles. It’s still cute you sent! Your wanting to share knowledge with me has always made me happy. Your motivation for things and wanting me to experience them to has always been something I loved about you. I’ve always loved your drawings. I have some random things you’ve drawn. I’m not sure of what or where. But I have some. Hehe. Seeing even more is so nice 🥰 and… I’m not gonna pretend to be strong and I’m gonna say the same things for the next pic. But.. I forgot about your journal until you showed me. And after showing me pics you drew of me. Lovey words around me. “I’m going to take you to bed and love you, I swear; like the end is here; when the world is over; we’ll just be beginning..” I just. I dont care if it was 4-5 years ago. Or that were so far apart. Or if you just express your love passionately! You took time to draw me. Think of beautiful words of how you felt about us. And. It’s not the only time. I’m over hyping. And trust me I’m not taking this as a. Ohhh princess is still thinking v of me so chance of an us! No i know the reality of things. Chances would be slim. We’re far. Doing things. And overall focusing on that would be silly rn. But. My love is inside you. And yours in me. And tho it may lay dormant for now. I also know that all it will take is a certain spark to light the fires inside us! Hehe rambling! But! You make me happy! And! Someday you will be mine! And I know you don’t hate that idea is what I’m getting at! But I’ll make that risk of us worth it. Daddy with drive! 🥰

Next page was the texts and another set of lovey words!! 🥺😖 ahh!! Even texts! Tho it was a mixture of lovey and silly. That’s what makes it so us. Lovey. And silly. You. You honey :0) you will always be my honey. Asleep in a meadow. Kisses sweet like cherries. Well babygirl. Give me a kiss ☺️

Next!

And final. And probably the most heart melting 🥰🙈😖🥺

I’ll try to summarize bcuz there’s a lot. It’s so special. The whole page baby. Idk the difference of time between drawings exactly. But. I like to think that as we spent more time together it became easier to draw my face. There’s so much more detail in the next one. Both are good but it’s just like. You can see how my face became more engraved in your head. Prolly used pics but still. It’s there. Your mf baby. Meaning everything to you. Things may be different now. But I still feel the same for you. And I feel like you for me. Just. Things have changed of course. But Based on my posts. If there was. Way to pick futures. You might at least give me a hug. But maybe. You’d indulge and take even more of your daddy. Lovingly or more 🙈. Comic con :,)) I’m sure you’ve shared with me how I help you and make you happy. But reading it out. The fact you wrote about our date together. And how things got iffy but I comforted you. We’re so similar and have so much fun with me 🥰 :+) you’re so. Sweet.

This part could be a format for a poem rather than our texts but Id like to believe that is us. And since it’s with me I’m sure it is 🥰 it’s just so sweet I cant believe it to be true. But. I will bcuz you are the sweetest girl in the world

We’ll be trees and other things. But always together

Promise?

Yes!! You better always be mine!

It feels so good to know your there. To feel your presence. Or see you from across the room

I typed this all again bcuz.. I just don’t know. Don’t be upset. I teared up a little writing this part. Only briefly. But! I’m okay! You just made me so happy baby. Not in past tense. You still do. Even if we cut off completely. You still motivated me to try more. And live life. I know you made the hard decisions. To leave and move and etc. and I did my own thing. But I didnt just sit still. I’ve moved! I plan to be a chef! I will! Hehe! Like! Rn I’m still same me. But now that I’m moved and new environments that won’t bog me down. It’s amazing. And If you hadn’t had made the choice. We may still be together. But not in position to take care of ourselves. We’ll meet again. I’m sure of that. Maybe once. Maybe in secret. Maybe for a final catch up. Maybe to go on a date and see if things feel right. No matter what. Or. If I just see you in another one of my dreams. You’ll always be with me. And I’ll always be with you. We used to say forever. But that’s an extreme word. Just say you love me. And I’ll know the rest. I’ll tell you I love you. And you’ll know the same. We’ll both know

That whether our end continues. Or a new beginning forms. Even if we lose contact. Or come face to face. Remember princess. You may not see me across the room. Or be able to touch me. But when you close your eyes. And think of me. Know that there’s a good chance. I’m somewhere. Doing the same thinking about you. I’m sorry I get overly lovey. I know it prolly makes things hard. I hope it doesn’t. I hope you can live your life how you want. And set aside your love for me. Like a time capsule. That can only be opened when we’re both ready. Or however you want to. As long as your thinkin of yourself first. I promise I am. Im done now! So long 🥺 gonna be a while before I get anymore gifts bcuz of how long daddy makes you read!

I love you H -your world. Your best friend. Your soulmate, J💜🧡

[ghostevity]

not tryna say you're stealing from salem out right but. u do know that ash is also based off of salem themselves too right? like u mentioning your persona isn't a copy of ash just because it's based off of yourself irl is still kinda the same thing tearzah did to create ash... idk I think you could still probs change things up, bcuz you obviously acknowledge how similar they are- persona's also don't have to look exactly like you do irl? the fact you don't change it even a bit, on top of using salem's art poses & old art style just feel rly weird tbh... It's a bit more than inspiration at this point ngl

hi didnt really want to answer this but because you brought up the topic of my persona, im gonna /nm

you say that personas don't have to look exactly like someone does IRL, but that's what i feel comfortable with. the point of a persona is something that represents you as a person. so thats what im drawing. I just also happen to be dollkin and angelkin. so obviously, I'm going to draw my persona with angel wings, or doll joints. even if i wanted to change from the cutesy pastel style, it wouldn't magically happen overnight.

and salems poses arent the only ones im using for reference. i go to google and just search stuff up. if you're implying that I'm trying to become just like salem, then wouldnt I have tried to do that by now? story, ocs and all? because ive seen several other people do that.

anyways, im tired.

[ticktockteapot]

I had to step away from Wonderland for a while (long post ahead)

Sooo hi, I know Ive been absent from this blog for these past couple of weeks but ALOT of shitty things have been happening IRL....

TL:DR I had mental breakdowns, existential crises, and depression from burnout/finances. But then I met some people that helped me fall back into my wonderland phase. Now I've got a new job and Im gonna get my shit together

Click the Read More below

Having a literal existential crises about wat I'm doing with my career (or lack thereof)

My current job messing up my paychecks for a 2 months so I had ALOT of financial stress bcuz my bills were due which led to panic attacks and the return of my alcohol addiction 2: electric bugaloo

✨JOB HUNTING™✨

✨Preparing for interviews for said job hunting✨

✨✨LITERALLY HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISES ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT I SHOULD FOLLOW MY DREAM JOB (ANIMATOR/STORYBOARDER) OR STAY STUCK IN A SOUL CRUSHING CORPORATE JOB THAT CAN KEEP ME FINANCIALLY STABLE BUT NEVER HAVING ENOUGH TIME OR ENERGY TO MAKE MY ART/IMPROVE MY DRAWING SKILLS✨✨

And the fandoms that I'm in didn't help my mental state at all either... 😔 This blog and the fandoms were supposed to be my escape from reality but there was nothing but negativity/bad vibes/not enough content which pressured me into trying to be the mediator and push myself to try to come up with more content. . . . but I just got burnt out halfway (now I have even more unfinished projects) and I just became severely overwhelmed and shutdown (being an empath really sucks besties hahaha 🙃)

I started really doubting myself especially about my art skills and if I'm worthy of being a self-proclaimed content creator (as many other artists tend to struggle with too)

I literally never had any energy and time to create stuff bcuz it conflicted with my work schedule, which made me lack motivation to get anything done and my unmedicated ADHD certainly didn't help either sheeeeeeesssshhhhhh

But it seems like the universe aligned and I got a major wake up call and it gave me some hope!

A few weeks ago on my way to work at the Chocolate Factory (working the assembly line at a chocolate factory is not as 🎉fun🎉 as one would think ngl) my Uber driver that night just so happened to be an ex-Disney employee! His name is Peter and he used to be a Disney Sketch Artist and did a little voice acting for the Disney Parks. I started asking him all these questions about working for Disney and he mentioned how he's trying to earn money for his daughter to go to art school and I kinda fangirled about the other Disney Sketch Artist "Briannacherrygarcia". During the whole conversation I couldn't help but feel so inspired again and felt like maybe I could actually get somewhere with my art... If he could do it maybe so can I?

Go follow him on his social medias!!! Hes really cool!!!

And if THAT wasn't more of an eye opener then last week was! Apparently one of my coworkers in the factory used to work for Disneyworld and Universal Studios!!! She used to be a cast member for the parades as The actual Mickey Mouse, Minnie Mouse, Donald Duck, Winnie the Pooh, Piglet, Stitch, Timon, Meek, Turk......and best of all....... THE WHITE RABBIT himself 🐇 I can officially say I'm friends with the White Rabbit!! She even gave me a bunch of autographs too!!!

As of right now Im finally in a better place to start over and I start my new job in 2 weeks (it's not a Disney job but atleast it's away from my soul crushing job at the factory. Baby steps...baby steps....) and maybe I can get my shit together and muster up some courage to do the things that made me happy again...

TL:DR I had mental breakdowns, existential crises, and depression from burnout. But then I met some people that helped me fall back into my wonderland phase. Now I've got a new job and Im gonna get my shit together

[rosyreef]

I saw your next gen in the tag and tell you that they are all so cool!! ^w^ Will you be posting updates here or on another blog? I tried keeping up the the carrd but there’s 2 of them and they dont let you know when they are updated p.s. my fave is totes adele she’s awesome >w<

oh shit hi!!! tysm for being interested in them wtf ;___; i’ll be real i barely post the updates anywhere but the actual carrd itself but honestly i should stop doing that LMAO

my deviantart is polymercorgi and my instagram is prismillon - i am gonna be much much more likely to post about them there than on here since i usually only post stuff im really proud of here and nothing else. hopefully i’ll get into posting new characters on deviantart (more likely than insta bcuz of the aspect ratio stuff) but i havent been doing a lot of ref drawing lately so idk... maybe at some point.

uhm also! i am probably gonna be making a new carrd or two since me and my co-creator (my boyfriend @zombielaunch LMAO) have been working on a few other au’s i haven’t gotten around to making carrds for. im still working on the others, its just, like i said, i haven’t been drawing many refs so i forget that i even need to create new profiles OOPS but im just mentioning that so you know to keep up if you’d be interested in that :-)

[wifibug]

HEY WHATS UP HOW HAS UR DAY BEEN!!!

FUCKING EPIC !!!!!!!!!!! im home alone rn so it kinda sucks but i got my cat hana nd shes babey so its ok. i played some more cotnd nd was like hehe i can be gamer w pro strats got a dopamine release from ur art nd then spent like an hour sketching my half only to start losing it while lining it but i have to deliver this fucking joke i have to it made me laugh nd i dont know WHY so by law. i gotta. also i was gonna draw u like. bh stuff even though ive never watched it as like a bonus bcuz it looks fun but yeah ive been doing great im ahving fun babey !!!!!!!!!!

[moreenchiladasplease]

✨, 🍪, 🌧️, 🎶, 💘, 🍩, 💅🏻, 🍒, 🎀 (if you were to show kiku your intuos do you think he'd be able to grasp it easily or do you think he's a disaster when it comes to electronics?)

✨- which fictional character (book, show, or movie) do you relate to most?

cough cough kiku i think charlie from the perks of being a wallflower is the most recent character i’ve felt connected to. obviously his mental health is worse than mine and the root of worse things but i felt like i identified with him. how he found comfort in his books. in his friends. how emotional he is. how much of a curious soul he is. how he feels sometimes alienated from people, even family.

“i am very interested and facsinated how everyone loves each oher, but no one really likes each other.” still one of my favorite quotes about family.

🍪- cookie dough or cookies?

honsetly, i could go either way, but cookies are my way to go. im not gonna refuse cook dough tho bcuz im not a dumbass

🌧️- favorite thing to do on rainy days?

cold, rainy days are the best to curl up n bed with some tea and a book. or netflix until you fall asleep.

i wish i could go out in the rain tho. im the type of person that loves to stand in the rain, feel it slide down my skin. idk it’s soothing to me. but my mom doesn’t let me bcuz i’ll get sick.

when we were in the states, there a big rain storm in bakersfield, cali where we were staying w our grandparents. it just started pouring down. and i just stood in the rain until my grandpa snapped at me lol. i love the rain

🎶- favorite song right now?

i never have a single favorite song at one moment. i’ve been listening to a lot of the neighbourhood and the rose songs. i especially love ‘sweater weather’ by the neighbourhood and ‘baby’ by the rose.

i swear woosung’s voice makes me quiver. and makes me just very very emotional. he has such a unique way of singing… it’s just very throaty and it’s so so good to just close my eyes and listen to him sing

💘- 3 ways to win your heart?

gifts, gifts, gifts.

i know that sounds superficial but it’s not really about the gift itself, it’s more about the thought that’s put into it. i love gift giving myself because i notice lttle details about people and get them gifts accordingly. so if i get a gift that’s thoughtful and personal, that you would only know i’d like if you paid attention to the little things, it speaks wonderous measures to me. if you’ve ever given me a gift and i’ve gotten emotional and choked up, then you’ve done a lot for my soft, soft soul.

🍩- current mood?

i’m just getting ready to go out w my sister to some gathering so i’m a little jittery. i don’t really want to go. i just want to lay in bed and finish my book and maybe catch up on some shows. but she doesn’t want to go alone so…

💅🏻- do you like being spoiled?

i love being spoiled but to a certain degree. i love being spoiled because it doesn’t happen frequently. if it happened a lot i’d be overwhelmed and probably guilty bcuz im broke and cant spoil anyone

🍒- how do you act when you have a crush?

i get clammy, stutter a lot , and get very very red in the face. it’s a total disaster a total lovestruck fool with everyone i meet really. it does not take much for me to develop a crush. seriously all you have to do is just be remotely kind to me, like smile. or be a bit of a dork and im just (♥ω♥*)

i had so many crushes on elementry school good god. there was this boy who would always sit in the swing next to me when i swung. and we didn’t talk or anything but he was cute and we smiled at each other. there was another boy in second grade who always shared his cookies with me and if that’s not love then i don’t know what is. alas it was not meant to be…

anyway i’m just a Fool when i have a crush ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

🎀- if you were to show kiku your intuos do you think he’d be able to grasp it easily or do you think he’s a disaster when it comes to electronics?

i think he would be very confused. like how is this thing making brush strokes appear on the computer when you’re not drawing on the computer?? is it made w magic?? of course he would be a disaster. it’s his brand mariam. kiku = one whole Mess™