#because honestly it's not a problem and no one needs to learn AD&D for the purposes of ficcing

[the-s1lly-corner]

Knubbler hcs (Fluff alphabet edition)

Ik I just posted a fluff list to do with CRP characters last post but I also wanna do it with Knubbler because this fucker has been on my mine for WEEKS and I gotta feed my fellow dick enjoyers

Obvious heads up on heavy hc stuff since we don't have much on this dude RAAAAAAAH + still developing my hcs

Long since its A-Z, not proof read and I wrote this in one sitting I need to be put down

Attraction-

Torn between wanting to say he has high standards but I'm a dickface shipper sooo (/lh)

I can't explain it but I feel like he'd be into the feistier people; more dominant and outspoken, that sort of thing, ballsy. Also balancing with being chill so it's not just. Constant energy

Balance, you know

Appearance wise? I'm stumped tbh so maybe I'll revisit this later some day

Bonding-

While he enjoys dragging you around and spoiling you (getting into that for D + G), he does enjoy time spent at home with you! Knubblers always been the type of person to sit by a fire reading a book with a glass of wine; in a robe of course

At least he does to me

Calm stuff like that is a must

Oh how I crave domestic life hcs with this man

Cuddling-

I don't have PDA on this list so imma let it be said, this man loves affection, giving and receiving. Absolutely adores being all over you at all times and not at all afraid to show you off

Going to the actual prompt he doesnt care if you're larger or smaller than him, if you sprawl yourself over his chest he will melt!!!! Hold each other!!!

Dates-

This man is going to pour so much money into these dates

Could just be because we saw him take Abigail out to dinner but my brain defaults to restuarant dates, but otherwise I feel he's also a museum enjoyer (historical, art, ect)

Emotion-

Of course since this for reader insert stuff I can't exactly say who's more emotional so we're relying on Knubbler

I feel like. He's moderate, based on his interactions with Dethklok

He's patient by a considerable amount but has his limits

Absolutely pours his heart and guts out to you when hes drunk, though, not that he doesnt already shower you with compliments and affirmations

Wanna put him at a 6.5/10 when sober, and solid 8/10 when drunk

Family-

He doesn't strike me as the type to want kids, honestly, not that he has anything against them though, it's simply not what he wants

I saw someone hc a while back that he would have a bunch of siblings and I'm HARD agreeing on that + adding my own thing that hes an uncle

Need to write a silly fic where he's assigned as babysitter for a day (I desperately need more solo/knubbler centered stuff)

Gift Giving-

Nearly every week or so he will buy you something from flowers to jewelry to stuffed animals to fancy chocolates to really anything

If you so much as mention vaguely wanting something hes pulling out his wallet

This dude is likely loaded (based on working for Dethklok and being successful prior judging by the newspapers at the end of episode 2) so he's not afraid to drop some cash for you

As for receiving gifts he doesn't hold you to the same standard regardless of your income but he would be thrilled with anything you give him, I feel like hes a jewelry guy but maybe that's just because I like drawing him with rings

I feel like he'd go bonkers for baked good though

Harsh-

You guys may butt heads but you guys probably wouldn't argue too much outside of the basic disagreements that happen in every relationship!! Usually apologies for lashing out (if he does that in that particular argument) but will refuse to apologize if there's an actual problem that needs to be addressed (if said problem is on your end)

King of compromises (learned trait from working with bands me thinks)

Injury-

Depends on the severity

Knows very very basic first aid (cleaning, applying pressure if it's an open bleeding wound, cool water if it's a burn, ect) but more than that he's lost

Swearing and a bit of panic if it's something more serious, this is true for if hes the one hurt as well

If you're the one hurt hes going to hover all over you. Oh nooo please dont tell him hes your savior/hero, please don't make him reel good for pampering you oh NOOOOOOO (stares)

If hes the ome hurt hes going to bask in the attention if he needs to be taken care of, hypes up splinters/j

This stuff also applies to sickness

Jealousy-

Oh this is one jealous motherfucker. He will *glare* with those red pin prick robotic eyes of his

If someone's flirting with you he will saunter over and wrap an arm around you, loudly and sharply calls you babe to get the point across

^Kinda cliche but I feel like this man is a sucker for tropes

But if you're like actively uncomfortable I think he might have to intervene

See: his criminal record and the fact he "knows people who can 'take care of someone'", whether he'd actually follow through depends

Kisses-

Recieving he loves when you kiss his face; mouth, cheeks, nose

Giving, really everything is fair game if you give the go ahead; has a particular fixation on your hands (backs and knuckles), cheeks, and neck

Love anything from quick pecks to full on make out sessions

Love Language-

Physical touch and gift giving! Sometimes the gift giving can get intense since hes so ready to treat you like royalty but he doesnt mean anything malicious by it

As for receiving he has a soft spot for affirmations

Marriage-

He goes either way I think, but leans further to no marriage

That doesn't mean hes any less committed to you, though

You guys probably get matching rings even if there isn't a ceremony or legal thing, I think

No-

A deal breaker is like. If you're genuinely a bad person or a threat to his career

Like theres a difference between the shit Dethklok gets into and what you would have to do for him to cut you off full stop

Though I'm stumped on what exactly would call for that outside of being a genuinely horrible person, maybe I'll revisit this later

Oddity-

His laugh is the first thing I can think of. While I think the original is silly and cute in its own way, I'm kinda glad they changed it in the movie

He laughs at his own jokes and has a killer hair routine he follows religiously. Shitty innuendos, too. I am not going to let this man live down the hot dog thing and I KNOW it ain't a one off thing there is no way, this man gets no bitches (using Nathan's "you're horrible with women" comment as leverage)

Outside of that I dont think there's many quirks or habits that are worth mentioning

Petnames-

By law he has to call you Baby/Babe but I can also see him saying Hon/Honey, maybe even Sweetheart

Loves being called things like Dear and Darling

Question-

Loves coming to you to ask if you wanna give a second opinion on something hes working on, work related or not! Hes more than confident in his skills regarding sound engineering, but he likes getting the attention and time from you

Risk-

Skipping this because I'm truly stumped on trying to figure out how far hes willing to go in a relationship in terms of taking risks

SHH-

Has a few secrets, ranging from personal stuff to things that ultimately don't concern you

And that's okay, as long as it's not anything that can screw you or the relationship over, privacy is necessary

Probably has a lot of secrets surrounding dumb or embarrassing stuff hes done before and during the relationship

Tunes-

Obligatory I have a funky sense of music and while I want to choose a song that fits the time period of the main show to the decades before I'm a bit lost. Also I dont generally listen to love songs/songs that can be passed off as ones if you squint. So you guys get 2 songs that give me knubbler x (reader/oc insert) vibes

And

Upset-

When Knubbler is upset he shuts himself off and tries to get over whatever funk hes in, usually a glass or two is involved

Occasionally he'll seek you out for comfort or validation

If you're the one upset he's already lending you an ear and offering a shoulder to lean on (metaphorically and literally), gets mad on your behalf if someone upset you and offers solutions if it was something else

I like to think that you guys dedicate nights for venting and unloading on drama and bullshit. Like two gossiping moms

Valentine-

He is not holding back

You wake up to breakfast and gifts. He takes you out all day for shopping, you guys come home to get ready for dinner and a movie

Things definitely get.. intimate

But this is a SFW blog so I am not going to elaborate

Wedding-

If there is a wedding you guys make sure it's straight out of a storybook; dream wedding basically

Since he's not too worried about getting married I'd assume it makes sense that he lends most the power to you when it comes to decorating

Xray-

Urges you to communicate your feelings outwardly and verbally since hes not a mind reader, but he does pick up on certain behaviors to give him a general idea of how you're feeling

He doesn't want to push too hard, though, so he tries to offer an environment where there's open communication

Yearning-

Stealing this from my friend but hc that Knubbler actually would not know how to react to someone genuinely having an interest in him, at least in the beginning

Like he knows he's not the ugliest or the most horrible person but he doesnt think hes a heartthrob

So when you come along and actually get him to sit and settle down with someone he kinda. Doesn't know how to feel about being on his own/seperated

Like he can still function but hes finding himself thinking about you a lot; from wondering how your day is to things he wants to tell you when you guys are reunited

Zzz-

As mentioned before he loves cuddling so be ready for him to hold onto you

Prefers soft and light covers compared to heavier ones

Probably yoinks the blanket while he's sleeping

Probably snores

Bonus hc I think his robo eyes can be taken out, like for charging and he has a lil case for them. Has a sleeping mask so nothing gets into his sockets + he understands how it looks to others (especially if they wake up half asleep in the dark and arent used to the empty sockets yet)

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

New Rule: Whoa, Canada | Real Time with Bill Maher

And finally, New Rule. If we want to save our country, we should follow the advice good liberals have given for decades and learn from other countries.

Especially those beacons of progressivism like Canada, England, and Scandinavia, and I agree we should, as long as we're honest about the lessons we're learning. And as long as we're up to date on the current data. Such as, the unemployment rate in the US is 3.8 percent. And in Canada, it's 6.1. And of the 15 North American cities with the worst air pollution, 14 are in Canada.

I'm not citing these stats because I have it out for Canada. I love Canada, and its people, and always have, but I hate zombie lies. Zombie lies. That's when things change but what people say about them doesn't. Yes, for decades, places like Vancouver, and Amsterdam, and Stockholm seemed idyllic, because everything was free and all the energy we needed was produced by riding a bike to your job at the windmill. Canada was where all the treasured goals of liberalism worked perfectly. It was like NPR come to life but with poutine.

Canada was the Statue of Liberty with a low-maintenance haircut and cross-country skis. A giant idealized blue state with single-payer health care, gun control, and abortion on polite demand. Canada was where every woke White college kid, wearing pajama pants outdoors who'd had it up to here with America's racist patriarchy, dreamt of living someday. I mean, besides Gaza.

There's only one problem with thinking everything's better in Canada. It's not. Not anymore anyway. Last year, Canada added 1.3 million people, which is a lot in one year. The equivalent of the US adding 11 million migrants in one year. And now, they are experiencing a housing crisis even worse than ours. And we're sleeping in tents. The median price of a home here is 346 grand, in Canada, converted to US dollars, it's 487. If Barbie moved to Winnipeg, she wouldn't be able to afford her dream house and Ken would be working at Tim Hortons. And because of mortgage debt, Canada has the highest debt to GDP ratio of any G7 nation. I don't know what that means, but it sounds bad.

So does their vaunted health care system, which ranks dead last among high income countries in access to primary health care and ability to see a doctor in a day or two. And it's not for lack of spending. Of the 30 countries with universal coverage, Canada spends over 13 percent of its economy on it, which is a lot of money for free health care.

Look, I'm not saying Canada still isn't a great country. It is, but those aren't paradise numbers. If Canada was an apartment, the lead feature might be "America adjacent." And if America was a rental car, Canada would be "America or similar."

And again, honestly, Canada, I'm not saying any of this 'cause I enjoy it. I don't, 'cause I've always enjoyed you. But I need to cite you as a cautionary tale to help my country. And the moral of that tale is, "Yes, you can move too far left." And when you do, you wind up pushing the people in the middle to the right. At its worst, Canada is what American voters think happens when there's no one putting a check on extreme wokeness.

Like the saga of Canadian shop teacher, Kayla Lemieux, whose pronouns are she/her and those. Kayla is now back to being a guy named Kerry, but two years ago when "they" showed up to teach children, the progressive high school "they" taught at said that they-- They, the school, not the person. Really? You couldn't have found another word? We were using that one. Anyway, okay. They were committed to a safe environment for gender expression. Safe for who? What about the children? What about the equipment in that shop class?

You know, there was once a weirdo D-list movie producer in the '60s named Russ Meyer who made low-budget B movies like Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! And Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. Always featuring women who look like this. His movies played in porn houses and were featured in Hustler and Playboy. Okay, fine, but who says, "No, when it comes to huge, ridiculous tits, let's save that for the kids."

And this is why people vote for Trump. They say in politics, liberals are the gas pedal and conservatives are the brakes, and I'm generally with the gas pedal, but not if we're driving off a cliff.

On the trans issue, America is no ands, ifs, or buts about it, absolutely alone in the world now. An outlier country. Last month, England's National Health Service announced that there's "not enough evidence to support the safety or clinical effectiveness" of puberty blockers for third graders, and that they were going to stop fumbling around with children's privates, because that's Prince Andrew's job.

So too with all the other good place countries in direct opposition to America's choice to affirm children's wishes on switching gender, no matter the age or psychiatric history. The Far Left, which always like to use, "Well, Europe does it." Yeah, no, that doesn't work on this one anymore.

Or on immigration. Sweden opened its borders to over a million and a half immigrants since 2010. And now 20 percent of its citizens are foreign-born and its education system is tanking, and it has Europe's highest rate of gangland killings. And one result is that the far-right parties are in the government now there for the first time.

To which liberals say, "Blaming immigrants for the rising crime rate is racist." Yeah, but is it true? Of course, it's true. It's not a coincidence. The quality of life went down after the Somali gangs started a drug turf war using hand grenades.

Calling it "racist" doesn't solve the problem. It hands future elections to someone who will solve the problem, and who, I promise, you're not going to like.

==

For the record, I've said literally all of this, including making the comparison of flying off a cliff if you rely entirely on the gas pedal. Just saying.

When Trump takes office again, and he will, people will act stunned and ask, "how could this have ever happened?"

[feathers-little-nest]

And here it is, the list of my fav Iron Widow moments! Enjoy?

As always feel free to discuss with me or share your favorite moments!!

It's below the cut bcs spoilers

- chapter 5, I figured that I could note my fav moments of this book as well XD

- starting on not the best note, I fucking hate Yang Guang, I hate him so much, I want to rip his guts out,

- chapter 8, the fight was so epic!! I love how MC just kinda forgor about the whole dying thing and went with the flow

- and that she killed that motherfucker! I didn't have to tolerate him for too long >:D

- it's honestly quite funny that Qin Zheng was killed by pox (I hope I'm getting the name of the illness right lol, I'm reading this in Polish translation and have 0 knowledge about any medical terminology in English)

- just a note but it's harder for me to keep up with those notes for Iron Widow than for Qian Qiu. I think it's because 1. its pace is faster 2. its chapters are shorter. so anyway

- chapter 10, Wu Zetian just needs to scream 24/7 and I respect it so much

- chapter 12, idk, Li Shimin is kinda cute

- I also like strategist Zhuge but that may be just because he has a fan

- chapter 13, those qi power statistic are so untrustworthy lol. I wouldn't be so happy to have so much higher qi stats than the average if the margin of error is like 17k

- chapter 14, damn, I miss Yizhi...

- chapter 19, oh my god, Yizhi is back!! T^T

- I absolutely love all the tiny historical details in this story. I'm probably missing a lot but those which I can catch are amazing (and satisfying, good to know that I know something about Chinese history after all that learning)

- chapter 20, OMG YIZHI IS BI?? IS THIS FINALLY SOME GOOD BI REP??

- ZETIAN IS ALSO BI?? AM I IN HEAVEN? WHAT'S GOING ON??

- omg Gao Yizhi grabbing Li Shimin's leash is one of the things I need to draw, damn, it paints such a clear picture in my mind

- chapter 21, Sima Yi is just a hater by nature and I start to enjoy it,

- chapter 23, Yizhi screaming "you can't shoot me I'm rich!!!" I love this boy

- chapter 29, god, Yizhi, Shimin and Zetian are sooo cute

- also "one traumatized Xing Tian", that made me laugh out loud

- "usually adding qi of a third person only strengthened the dissonance (...) no one knows why we succeeded" yeah I wonder why, hmmmmmm

- chapter 30, MY BABYGIRL LI SHIMIN GOT CALLED AN ALPHA MALE I'M DYINGGG

- I kinda like Gao Qiu. I know he's probably bad news but damn, he's fun

- also a Wu Zetian fan nr1, seeing his reaction I'm surprised that he didn't ask for an autograph (I forgot that he's sexist af)

- tho, tbh, I think he's more afraid of what he can't control than purely sexist; interesting guy, I want to dissect him,

- I wonder if anything happened between LSM and GYZ during that party at Gao's, hmm,

- chapter 31, OUR THIRD PARTNER YIZHI, AWWW

- chapter 36, I actually think Sima Yi might be one of my fav characters? come on, the guy came to the wedding just because he wanted to support his little dumdums

- chapter 39, YES FUCK AN LUSHAN

- damn I didn't think they'll actually kill him. oh well. he won't be missed. judging by his character, even his son won't miss him

- Yizhi is the wife in this throuple, isn't he /jk

- OMG THE TRIANGLE IS FINISHED, THAT WAS SO CUTE!! WAAH

- chapter 42, I like how Wu Zetian's reaction to something not going well is just "maybe we should burn ourselves alive actually", relatable queen

- Sima Yi just lost his good guy badge. he better have a damn good excuse for abondoning MCs this easily,

- chapter 44, QIN PIERDOLONY ZHENG, już zawsze będę go tak nazywać 🫡

- chapter 46, is Qin Pierdolony Zheng playing snake with hunduns instead of apples¿?

- I still can't believe that Shimin is actually dead. Like. Dead dead. Super dead. Human marmalade dead. How... why him T^T

- chapter 47, I love how among all this death and destruction the worst problem Qin Pierdolony Zheng has is inflation,

- epilogue, DID SHIMIN BECOME A GOD PLS TELL ME HE BECAME A GOD

- Qin Pierdolony Zheng has a beef with gods, I think he's the most rel character now

[heretherebedork]

In Be My Favorite, I just can't with how everybody thinks that Pisaeng is absolutely perfect and Kawi is the only one with problems. Like, Pisaeng ALSO has so many problematic characteristics! (And so I'm sorry because this is sooo long!!)

Pisaeng's negative trait of being conflict-averse and not taking action until he either gets a mighty kick in the butt or it's actually already too late and he's standing at the altar led to many problems, especially in the original timeline.

2. This negative quality of Pisaeng is very well reflected in the original timeline and has led to, among other things: (A) That Pisaeng never approached Kawi and shared his feelings for him, (B) that he never sought a conversation with Kawi to clear up the misunderstanding at the Buddy Story, (C) that he never (officially) came out, (D) that he never had the clarifying conversation with Pear and (E) on top of that marries her (because he probably also wanted to avoid a conflict with Pear here, which doesn't sound so unlikely after episode 7).

3. In another timeline, Pisaeng accuses Kawi of why Kawi didn't realize he had feelings for him for over 10 years. Whereby I wondered how Kawi should know that, because Pisaeng wasn't completely honest with Kawi in this timeline either and sent him completely different signals here, too, by being about to marry Pear. I can understand Kawi, who was completely perplexed and surprised at first.

4. Kawi didn't know about Pisaeng's feelings for him in the original timeline, the feelings which started much earlier than we assume in the first episodes, and Kawi only learned about it in timelines three/four, (from his point of view, the encroaching kiss from Pisaeng at the end of the episode).

He just cowers away from conflict so much, until everything is about fall apart (sometimes even after everything has fallen apart, he says nothing.)

No one is perfect and, frankly, no character needs to be perfect.

Sometimes, they just need to be likeable.

Added because I can't give short answers

Look, Piseang is conflict avoidant and learns better and starts standing up for himself and coming out and finding Kawi and confessing to him and taking to Max.

He is not perfect and I definitely prefer him that way. Perfect is boring, see Pob from Don't Say No who genuinely was perfect.

Piseang is plenty flawed but he is flawed in a way that is answered by visible growth that takes time but is seen again and again and becomes increasingly more selfless.

Did he literally assault Kawi in a timberline that no longer exists? Yes. But we've also seen how that future will never happen now because his choices and growth keep in going the more time he spends around better people.

Now, why he would never have spoken to Kawi in the original timeline makes the most sense since he did so exactly what he said he would which was wait for Kawi to tell him what he wanted and then stepped in to save him all without ever speaking to him and, honestly, probably had no idea how much any of that meant to Kawi since they never spoke.

But yeah. Piseang isn't perfect and I like that about him.

Only Max is perfect.

[orlissa]

The newest episode* of Getting Published Might Not Be So Hopeless After All

*As if there were earlier episodes

I finished a book the other day--it's a recent publication (came out last month), currently at 3,61 on Goodreads with nearly 6000 ratings

It's titled My Roommate Is a Vampire, and the title just about tells you everything that you need to know :D

But in a nutshell: after spending the last century or so in a magic induced coma, our vampire main guy has a deep seated desire to be able to blend in in the modern world, so he places an ad for an unsuspecting human roommate. Cassie (our main female/POV character) is a down-on-her-luck artist currently being evicted from her apartment, so she jumps on the opportunity. Time goes by, not so much stuff happens, and they fell for each other. The end.

Literally. There isn't much else that happens in the book.

That being said, the novel is not without its virtues. The start off situation is funny, especially since while Cassie doesn't know that she is moving in with a vampire, even with the guy's erratic, but heartfelt behavior, the audience does, so there are a bunch of endearingly hilarious situations. I honestly thought this setup would make a great sitcom. Plus all of the chapters start with either a letter/letters, chat messages, google searches, diary entries, etc., which was a narrative choice I really liked, especially since it allowed a glimpse into other characters' thoughts beyond Cassie.

The rest is under cut, because it got long

But holy crap, everything else in this novel was so underdeveloped I can't even express. It was like that author had this fun idea, but nothing beyond it, but was still determined to make it work. Like the publisher saw the opportunity in the setup, and had an editor work on it with the author, but then accidentally ended up publishing the original manuscript before the edits.

The author never took the effort to properly work on the lore. Basically the whole "presenting the lore" part is the two main characters watching Buffy, and the vampire guy (who is named Fredrick J. Fitzwilliam, btw) saying that yeah, the show got some things wrong, got other things right, and there are like 2 examples. We never actually learn how he, himself got turned (or how vampires get turned, for that matter). Also, there is his "mother" in the story - is she his maker? His actual mother? Both? We never learn!

Not to mention his whole backstory. At the point I have to compare it to All Souls, since we have a guy turned into a vampire hundreds (thousands) of years ago, when he was in his mid-thirties. In All Souls (okay, that's a bit longer story, I know, but still, it would take like, what, 5 pages?) we learn who Matthew was in his life, what he liked, what he did, we learn about his family, his tragedies, how he was turned, and, as a vampire, grew from an artisan into a de-facto nobleman. Fredrick, in contrast, started out from a humble home (we never explore how he ended up with upper class demeanor), and apparently did nothing until he was turned in his mid-thirties. Apparently he had no job, no family... And honestly, why wouldn't a guy in his mid-thirties be married in the 18t century? It's just such a lazy job, such lazy writing.

Also, there a scene (there are a bunch of scenes, really, but let me use this one as a example) where Cassie takes Fredrick to a party hosted by her best friend (she has a gay best friend, of course XD), and he prepares by memorizing a bunch of stuff about Taylor Swift, because he did his research, and apparently she is very popular in this age group.

The problem here is that, once again, the author didn't think it through. Reciting random facts is not just odd, but it's like the guy has zero frame of reference--but it's not just he doesn't have a frame of reference, it's that his frame of reference is drastically different. If I wrote it, it wouldn't be just reciting facts, and haha, it is funny, because Taylor is a big deal and I'm resonating with the audience. Instead, let's have Fredrick compare her to the great singers of his era. Like "I read about this lady, and I'd like to hear her sing--what do you mean it's all recorded? And what about live? In which establishment does she sing? In a stadium?!"

(And, yeah, btw, Frederick is said to have been in a coma for a hundred years, but that would mean that he went to sleep in the roaring twenties, and yet he acts Victorian/Regency period, which is, once again *just lazy, unrefined writing*)

The big conflict is supposed to be that Fredrick mother wants him to marry some vampire chick, and he is against it all. I have some many problems with how this plotline is excuted. Like 1, the vampire chick (called Esmeralda for some reason, which somehow sounds really tacky) is never seen in person. She is literally a non-character. Also, throughout the whole book she is super adamant about wanting to get married, then suddenly has a change of heart off screen in the last chapter. 2, Fredrick pulls himself together at some point to go and tell the families in person that he won't marry her, and... he gets taken hostage. And held for days. Which we never see, because he is not the POV character. There is zero tension, zero stakes (not even, you know, the kind you kill vampires with). Cassie figures out after some time that she is missing, she writes an e-mail to his mother that if they don't release him she'll expose vampires on TikTok (wheezing), and then Fredrick mother just backs down and releases him and HAPPY END! Honestly... that's the whol conflict. The sex scene is written with more details.

Talking about sex (because of course there is a lot of longing, and talk about erections, and then a long ass sex scenes, which I did not enjoy, because by then I was done with both characters): when Fredrick is released, he has wounds on his wrists after being tied up, and he is like "don't worry, it's just my heart doesn'T beat, so my blood doesn't flow *like that* so I heal slower :)

Like... okay, listen to me here... if his heart doesn't beat... and his blood doesn't really flow... you know what is highly unlikely to happen, right? RIGHT?!

So yeah, it could have been a good book, but it's just So Damn Badly Written from a technical point of view that I just can't. Nope. I can't.

But if this can get published, then who says I or you can't?

[pressagie]

tw: homophobia

hello!! first of all i just wanna say that i love your blog (@/diospirando) so much. i found you through your uquiz (which was really helpful btw). i came here to ask about my love life. here is a little bit about me: my hobbies include learning about marine life and watching films. i am a lesbian and come from a pretty religious family and almost everyone i know is also very religious. i haven’t come out to anyone for obvious reasons except for a few really close friends. i myself am not religious and have left my religion last year, however i feel this overwhelming sense of guilt for leaving even though whenever i try to come back to my religion i just can’t get myself to believe in it again. sometimes i wish i could just go back to believing in it like i did before and try my best to start liking men because i really dont want everyone i know and love to hate me. all of my irl friends are homophobic and i feel a lot of guilt for what i am and after constantly being told my whole life that i will go to hell for simply loving someone i just dont know anymore what to do because i am really so lonely. a lot of my irls are in relationships and i just wanted to ask if there is someone for me as well? like someone who is able to understand me unlike all of the other people in my life and accept me for who i am? and is there a chance of that person being a guy? (i know this sounds bad of me asking since i just said i am a lesbian but i really am just hoping that there is some guy out there that i will like so i can continue to have a good relationship with my family and friends). i am honestly just really sick of being lonely and not being understood, i just want to meet someone who gets me well. i have a preference for tarot but you can decide which works best for my situation. i’d also like to request a book passage and song of your choice. again, thank you and sorry for this question being so long.

hi im so sorry im the person who sent the last anonymous ask (the one that mentions being a lesbian and having a very religious family). i forgot to add something to it and i have no idea how to unsend/edit an ask because im kind of new to tumblr but i just wanted to add something to my question. I'd like to know about future patner and the type of person they are (any information is about), it can be their appearance, personality, achievements, where I'll meet them or even how they're doing currently in life whatever you can channel I'll be happy with anything. thank you :D

Hey 🤎

I'm so sorry you're going through that.

(And thank you for the TW.)

Speaking as a queer person with christian and queerphobic relatives: please remember that you can't choose to like men, or anyone for that matter. Obviously, attraction is fluid – but let me ask you this (and tell me to fuck off, if it's not my place): even if you were to be with a guy, would that solve all the problems which the people in your life have?

I can't tell you what to believe, just as no one should. But if you need to hear this, and it helps in any way: I promise that you're not going to hell for being a lesbian, and you deserve so much better than the judgement and guilt from your family and other people. You deserve to be happy, be it single or otherwise. You deserve understanding, to feel connected – and not only acceptance, but FULL BLOWN RESPECT.

(I'm really glad that you liked the quiz! Guessing you meant this one?)

(Did I understand correctly that you follow me @diospirando? Either way, feel free to come say hello 🥰 I'm very curious to know if we've interacted before, but no pressure!)

(Oh and you can't unsend/edit asks.)

Note: I added some info to my pinned post, and I recommend (to everyone who sent in questions) giving it a read.

Now on to your reading... I did try Tarot first like you asked, but the Oracle's what you get today 🤠

This deck is based on animals at risk of extinction in the Iberian Peninsula (where I live) and others with relevant roles in our mythologies/religions... I included their names, in case they have any personal, special meaning for you – and there are some marine species :]

Spoiler alert: you only got birds 😂 but at least 3/5 (that I checked) are related to the sea!

Is there someone for me as well?

— Who is able to understand me unlike all the other people in my life and accept me for who I am?

ASCENSION & the pigeon Columba palumbus azorica (horizontal)

I take the terms the author of this deck uses with several grains of salt cause I don't buy into the common spiritual associations with, e.g., ascension (but that's a conversation for another time) so here I'm taking the card to mean distancing yourself, traveling... Flying, if you want to be more literal.

This species is endemic to basically one of the Azores islands only – meaning it can't be found anywhere else in the world. If you combine this information, I think it's fair to say that you can find someone (to have a relationship like you want) if you look somewhere you already expect to find them, such as a specific community (that could very well be online)!

Sidenote: it landed on my lap instead of the table, and I usually use that to signal if something/someone has tried to catch your attention, or is still trying – so pay attention.

I'd like to know about my future partner and the type of person they are.

— Their appearance, personality, or even how they're doing currently in life.

RECOGNITION & the falcon Falco naumanni (horizontal) AUTHENTICITY & the gull Ichthyaetus audouinii (upright) + VISION & the eagle Aquila adalberti (inverted) WISDOM & the eagle-owl Bubo bubo (upright)

You may recognize each other from somewhere, but not like you knew each other well before (there is a Reunion card to symbolize that kind of previously established contact/relation in a stronger way). This falcon is a summer migrant so that might point to when you first crossed paths and/or will cross again.

Their personality is authentic, but you'll have a hard time seeing that (at first). This could be related to your own interests and lifestyle, and the concept of individuality (refer to the gull's and the eagle's links for inspiration to think deeper about this).

Either they're being thoughtful regarding how they live, and making wise choices, they're a student/teacher – or both! The Bubo bubo (adorable name) being a species of eagle-owl can indicate some connection to the previous eagle card (individuality, perspective...).

This is getting a little long so I'm gotta let you take it from here 🐚🌊

Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (1865) Chapter III: A CAUCUS-RACE AND A LONG TALE

«They were indeed a queer looking party that assembled on the bank – the birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their fur clinging close to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and uncomfortable.»

Movement by Hozier in Spotify Singles (2019)

Thank you for trusting me to read for you. I would love to know what you think: if this resonates with your circumstances, and what comes of it. Don't be afraid to give me honest feedback and suggestions, after all, it'll help me become a better reader :]

Do you want to expand on this or have another topic to explore? Leave me a (follow-up) question!

You can always include the numbered tag associated with your reading(s), and I'll add it to the future posts as well, so they are identified as belonging to the same querent, and easier to find – check below, next to #OMEN DEAL.

For Ko-fi tips (zero pressure)

I honor the spirit who helps with my practice – for winding and guiding my path, learning how to sit with me, and being a light to read by.

Elioth Gruner's Milking Time / Araluen Valley

[sleeplessvalley]

alright SO. what happened with the mug cookie.

it looks... not right! because my biggest mistake was that I fORGOT TO COVER THE CHOCOLATE CHIPS IN FLOUR AND SO IT'S A DOUGHY MELTED CHOCOLATE MESS

but honestly that's part of the charm so idc. I'm gonna keep trying since I do have a little experience in baking but not much (muffins and cupcakes)

even with that, though, it tastes good. mine turned out closer to a cookie crumble :P

notes and shit under the cut idk

this is how I found out that you're supposed to put butter in the microwave to melt slowly. our microwave in particular is very strong and I think I essentially boiled the butter................ for next time: 15 on power level 5, then the same on 4 and go from there

we have an egg yolk separator? which I don't think I'm going to use again. it's a lot easier for me to use the shells, despite getting a very clean yolk in doing this. also I'm awful with eggs I need to remember to put the bowl on tin foil

I also learned I still have incredibly steady hands and as long as I'm focusing, I don't spill sugar or flour, so that's helpful

the flour and chocolate chip step is where things went wrong the most because... well yes, it baked, but the problem with mixing the flour first is that it gets pretty damn hard to mix in the chips. honestly the flour and chips should go in at the same time and Then be stirred, or do the flour with SOME of the chips and then toss the rest in. I can also stop kinda early to put the chips in since those need to be mixed into the dough???

I probably shouldn't be using level 8 and 9 for this but also there's exactly zero power level specifications, hence my assuming 'high' for everything. it doesn't help that our microwave is very strong and I need to cap myself at 7

also I'm in the middle of eating it and I... let it sit too long, it got kinda stuck akdsfhjdfh. STILL EDIBLE, I JUST NEED TO APPLY MORE FORCE THAN NECESSARY TO GET A CHUNK

for future attempts:

PUT FLOUR ON THE FUCKING CHIPS DO IT DO IT DO IT D

mess around just slightly with doing the final step. maybe just outright use bare hands after a certain point to mix? or do 3 spoons of flour?

possible need to add a bit of water at that point too

adding a pinch of salt? good. though we normally use salted butter so we probably don't need it.

experiment with using only one type of sugar instead of two?

gauge the amount of ingredients needed based off the mug. someone said to double up on everything, so I might do that with everything but the flour and see what happens (and more can just be tossed in)

[mariana-oconnor]

Reading Stranger Things fics and just thinking 'Not one of you has mentioned THAC0 once, what even is this?'

[mrpenguinpants]

Genshin: Roommate HCs [V1]

To be honest, I just wanted to ramble some more and let my brainworms take over. This is sorta late but Happy Valentine’s everyone! I was gonna post this earlier but this honestly took me a long time to write so I moved it to today. 

Once again, this is 90% crack 10% content. Seriously, as much as I love writing this non-serious fics. Why do you people like this?

—

Based off my ramblings with Keqing anon: Link

Genshin: Holding Hands [V1]

Genshin: When you’re cold [V1]

Genshin: University AU [V1]

Genshin: Royalty AU [V1]

[Masterlist]

—

[taglist]  <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

@youaskedfurret @diaxfeliz @wintergreen-aix @kaechu @thegayrubberducky @lovelykittycatmeow @yuunoagivesmelife​  @dokidokisama @rokipersonal​@minakohasmanyhusbandos​ @strwbrry-lia @tigerpriestess​ @yuu-yuukurotsuki​ @hanniejji​  @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @sunnshiii​ @stanzastic @akaasea​ @xoneaboveallx​ @adoring-ghost​ @asheseiler​ @childelover​ @dilucsz​ @dai-tsukki-desu​ @thicmitten​ @nonniechan​ @htnicayh​ @genshins1mpact​ 

---

Diluc

What? Diluc has a roommate? Did you blackmail him in living with you? Is that even possible? Did you throw yourself in front of his car because you needed someone to pay for your student loans and the easiest way was to file a lawsuit? In this economy no one would blame you. Diluc seems like such the self-isolated character that would murder his roommate in cold blood but in reality, he act’s detached from the world because he forgot how to socialize and he’s desperately trying to cover it up without choking. That or he’s trying to learn how to astral project. If he could drink away the pain he would but instead he buys 20 packs of grape Kool-Aid and injects it into his veins. 

Does not and will not ever have a normal sleeping schedule. You’ll wake up to him working, come back home to him working, and will sleep to him still working. His daily dose of Vitamin D is from the brightness of his screen rather than the sun and he’s filter feeding at this point. It’s concerning. He’s going to crumble and he’s bringing the world down with him. Through the power of tax evasion. But as soon as he needs to walk out into society, he pulls movie magic and looks like perfection. It’s both physically and mentally disgusting. 

He’s actually is a really nice roommate to have just so long as you give him space. Great cook and knows to clean up after himself. Though he does have crash and burn days where’s he’s completely out of commission. You could set the entire apartment on fire and he would sleep through it. The entire two weeks are dedicated to zombie eye marathons and then he’ll suddenly collapse and sleep for 46 hours straight. When he wakes up from his hibernation he’s the most groggy and nonsensical person. His life blood is coffee because you keep hiding the 5 hour energy away from him because, you know, life is enjoyable and those cancer bottles will actually kill him.  

“University sucks our money out of our bodies faster than our will to live.” 

Beidou [Happy Birthday Queen 💕]

Despite her appearance, she’s actually really strong and it scares the piss out of you when you’re doing something or scrolling through your phone mindlessly and you suddenly get your spine re-arranged when she slaps you on the back to ask what you’re doing. Likewise, when she hoists you up and throws you over her shoulder so you come with her on her 3am convivence store raids for alcohol. It’s either you change now or else we’re walking out of the apartment in your t-shirt and no pants self. She can and will carry you under her arm that way. It’s both incredibly attractive and horrifying at the same time. 

She’s really friendly and a great talker if you’re alright with her “I must hold you in my arms, fresh prince of bel air style”. It doesn’t matter if you’re taller than her, she’s doing it. She does however, get in a bit of trouble from her rowdiness and you often get noise complaints but Beidou just passes them off to Ningguang and everything is fixed. She has ovaries of steel when neighbors rather confront her personally and she’s ready to 1v1 in the parking lot. You’re trying to desperately hold onto her shirt to stop her from pile driving your neighbors for the third time this week but she’s too strong.  

She’s constant party until we die attitude and suffers the hangover in the morning. It’s actually really funny to catch her in her hangover moods because whatever filter Beidou had, which is none, is gone. She really takes “cursing like a sailor” or the next level and the amount of creativity she comes up with is actually impressive. She can be a bit messy but she’s really likeable and always down to go anywhere with you as long as you’ll do the same. It’s a very ride together, we die together situation. You’re my best friend, you’re dying with me. I’ll see you in hell. 

“Imma T pose over my dad and then crash the car into the parking garage.” 

Kaeya

Kaeya on the surface seems like such a chill roommate. And he is for the most part. But he’s such an ass. Your things are his things, no questions asked. If you just bought a really nice sweater or you had leftover food, that’s his now. He’s innocent until proven guilty even if he’s literally holding your lunch. The pure amount of bullshit he can spit out to convince you that no, he did not pull the fire alarm because he wanted an excuse for not going to work, puts him on Shakespeare level. He’s also very pretty, way too pretty, sir can you share some of your genes? 

But aside from that, he’s actually super dependable. You forgot something at home? Sure, he has nothing better to do so he can bring them for you. We’re missing eggs? No problem, he’s just by the store. You’re 95% sure that he just wants to be cheeky and make you thank him for 20 minutes before he actually hands you what you asked for. It’s better for you if you never tell him anything you’re afraid of because Kaeya has no social cues, or more like he throws them out the window, and he’s probably a psychopath. 

He’s incredibly private of his room and things despite his attitude towards yours. You’re convinced he either has a secret lab or that’s where he’s storing the bodies. I was the good guy but due to unfortunate circumstances, I need to stab a bitch. But he’s a really good serious talker for those 3am, because everything happens at 3am, talks about life and the meaning of the universe. It absolutely wrecks your sleep schedule but some of the things you talk about are the most crackhead things like what’s the lowest amount of money someone would have to pay you to walk outside without clothes? It’s a legitimate question. 

“Never before have I been so offended with something I 100% agree with.”

Jean

Okay, what world did you save in a past life to live with his absolutely wonderful woman? Mother Teresa take a load off, take a seat. You have nothing to worry about. She’ll bring home little treats back home and it’s the most wholesome thing ever?? Is this what love and affection feels like? We’ve been starved for so long. She says it’s not a big deal and anyone would do it BUT THE MOMENT SOMEONE BUYS FOOD FOR YOU. IT’S A MAGICAL MOMENT. They are forever stuck in your will until proven otherwise. An absolute ray of sunshine that must be protected. 

She does get super busy so you don’t often see each other or get to hang out as much. She’s a bit of a workaholic but a lot more easier to talk her into taking a break. She’s also a pretty decent cook but she prefers baking and jesus christ, girl can you calm down? Be still my beating heart, I’ve been smitten. Has mother hen vibes that you’re not sure if she’s your roommate or if she adopted you into her family. It’s time to start a petition for the Jean protection squad. Given the opportunity, I would aggressively hold your hand. 

She’s always open to whatever you want to do. Any recommendations or things that you like she will try out at least once despite her busy schedule. She’s lowkey lonely because work consumes her so any time you want to hang out or do something together, she jumps on it like she’s feral. She get’s a bit shy to ask if she can join in on your plans because she doesn’t want to bother you or intrude no matter how many times you tell her that’s okay, she still get’s a bit iffy about it. Please save this girl before she trips. In your arms. Platonically. Just kidding haha. Unless?

“I can’t wait to see you happy and not hating everyone again haha.”

Childe

First impressions of Childe were great, until he opened his mouth and you realized how much of a two brain cell child(e) he was. He has two braincells because they constantly have to 1v1 in his brain. He’s lived with a lot of siblings so he has no social awareness or concept of privacy that you’re lucky if you come home and he’s half-dressed. It doesn’t matter if you’re 2 weeks older than him, he’s going to call you 82 years old and why your bones aren’t being fossilized at this point. He’s such a little shit, this fucker licks the yogurt lid peel.  

He get’s really restless when he’s stuck under house arrest, because apparently 1v1ing in the parking lot of a Wendy’s is illegal for some reason, so he makes dying whale noises until he get’s to go outside again. But he’s actually a really wholesome guy, probably because of his younger siblings, that he’ll sometimes get you something because you seemed down and it’s such whiplash? Who is this man and where did he come from? You’re starting to have a change of heart before he tells you that he got banned from the library for accidently punching the school’s computer. How you “accidently” punch something you have no idea but Childe always comes home with some sort of injury. Maybe he’s just incredibly clumsy. For your sanity, you’re going to go with that. 

He’s actually so uncultured that it’s crippling. You can’t blame him too much considering his upbringing and it’s great that he’s so interested in learning new things but...child no...It makes you want to take your spine out of your ass and rip it like a Beyblade. Watching him take chopsticks and stab his food like it’s marshmallows makes you want to fall into a blackhole and let the chair consume you. 

“I, too, fantasize about beating the living shit out of people.”

---

Is this another tag yourself game cause I resonate with Diluc. I’m crying in insomnia. As much as I enjoy writing these fics I absolutely hate tagging them. I remember I used to have a tag anon but that was back when I wrote for bnha. 

Valentine’s Day was fun tho. I had a drinking game with friends as we played league then ended it off with a movie night. 

[writertitan]

have you eve done the fluff alphabet before? They can be kind of long but I'd love to hear your thoughts on Levi!

this is so cute, i’ve never done a fluff alphabet! this is the one i’ve seen go around by @snk-warriors​ (so cute thank u for sharing)

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

I think Levi is the type of partner who starts up a new hobby with a partner as a way of bonding with them. Like, the two of you just get super into candle-making together lmao. I think he’d want to spend most of his free time with his partner, even if it’s just in comfortable silence. He really appreciates feeling safe with his person and relishes in the mundane.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

I’ll say it before and I’ll say it again. Levi doesn’t really have a physical type. He really pays attention to people’s character first. He would really admire how his partner is constantly trying to be their best self, and admires their strength, and he thinks it’s beautiful that they can see the good in life, because it helps him see the good in life too. He would absolutely love the most random parts of your body, though. Maybe it’s your cheekbones, maybe it’s the shape of your hands. Something that he thinks is so unique to you.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

Levi is not a man of many words a lot of the time, but he is a man of action. If his partner is feeling down in any way, he’s there physically to help you through it. Over time, he makes little mental notes of what seems to help and what doesn’t, so that he can continue doing the things that help you and stop doing the things that don’t. If you prefer just being held for a while, no talking, he catches on quickly and offers himself up. If you need to talk, he listens and makes sure you know you’re the only thing in the world he’s paying attention to at that moment. He’ll know how you’ve calmed yourself down in the past, before he was in the picture, and takes up that ritual himself. Did you make yourself some mac and cheese to cheer yourself up in the past? He knows the recipe now, too. Very action-based man.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Levi, especially canon Levi, has trouble envisioning any sort of long-term future for himself. He’s just living his life one day at a time and pushing through. However, with a partner in his life, he indulges himself with little visions of the future. Things like marriage, children, are blurry wishes to him tbh, not out of the question but things that he won’t allow himself to indulge in. They’re kind of a given if you’re serious, and that’s enough to satisfy him. But near-future things are things he often thinks about. He wants to live with his partner, wants to think about how they’ll spend their next anniversary, he often thinks about what you both will be doing together for the holidays. Those futures comfort him immensely.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

I think it is actually rather equal with Levi. He has so much baggage of his own, that a partner willing to share the load would make him feel really safe. But, I think he’d subconsciously be more of the dominant figure. He dedicates himself to his loved ones, and would do anything for them, and his partner would feel that tenfold.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Levi definitely is an, “I’m too old for this shit” type of guy when it comes to fights with his partner lmfao. He’s not about the dramatics of fighting. I don’t think he’d really ever yell at his partner or vice versa. The fights would have a snarky energy - I can see him snapping at his partner sometimes, or making an infamous sarcastic remark when he’s irritated - but Levi would honestly rather just discuss the problem bluntly and get it out of the way. But my god, the man wouldn’t back down until it was all cleared up.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

SO GRATEFUL. I think Levi would be so thankful to have his partner in his life. He knows he’s a tough nut to crack, so having someone finally get through to him is scary but wonderful. He sees everything you do for him and I think he’d honestly be so emotional about even the littlest things, because he’s so used to taking care of everyone else. It’s almost uncomfortable for him to know that someone is unconditionally loving him, but he’s grateful he has that love. Never takes it for granted.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Per the above, Levi is a tough nut to crack, and I think it would take a really, really long time to fully open him up. Like, a really long time. Honestly, he may not ever completely open up about his past because it can be so dark, but that doesn’t mean that he would actively keep secrets from you. If anything, his partner would know him the best out of everyone. While he may keep some stuff about his past in the dark, everything else is no secret. He’ll tell you about his day, about what’s going on with his friends, all that good stuff.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

I think Levi with a partner would be a little softer, and a little more optimistic. I also think a big thing that Levi would change would be his ability to compromise (because I think it’s hard for him to compromise). He’d definitely be a lot happier and kinder to himself with a partner around. And, in private, he’d allow himself to be more vulnerable and actually show his emotions. Levi is a pretty level-headed person as well, and I think he would pass that trait on to his partner.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Levi is not a jealous person, but he’s very protective of his partner!! This is the hill I die on!!! He is always looking out for you, so if someone does hit on you, he watches to see how you react. If it’s funny to you, it’s funny to him, but if it’s creepy to you, then he’s already cracking his knuckles.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

I don’t want to roast this lovely man but I don’t think he’d be a great kisser at first LMAO. He’s so not used to being loved. Levi is touch-starved, confirmed on Tanny’s blog. I think the first kiss is okay at best, definitely awkward, and Levi definitely doesn’t really know what to do. He’s a quick learner, though. He’s a good kisser in no time, after learning how you like to be kissed, and after finally getting him to believe it’s okay to be affectionate.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

I picture it as word vomit (Levi’s version of word vomit tho, which is like, a couple of sentences). He’d confess his feelings for you once he just can’t physically keep the words in anymore. He’d definitely fight against it for a while but then the word vomit happens. I think, specifically, his first “I love you” would be quite intimate and very quiet, just a whisper in your ear when he finally realizes it. Realizing he loves you would be much easier for him than realizing he has feelings for you, so he wouldn’t even hesitate with saying it first, the sweet boi.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

I don’t think Levi had ever considered marriage before meeting you. But after meeting you, that would likely change if you wanted to get married. He’d want to spend his life with his partner, and whether that means marriage or not, it doesn’t quite matter to him. Just the promise of being together is good enough for him. If the two of you do decide to get married, it’s no frills. Tbh, there’s no elaborate proposal from Levi, but he makes sure that he formally asks you and that it’s special to the two of you. Maybe he’d ask you at the place you first met/kissed/etc. The marriage itself would be just as lovely and peaceful as the relationship with him beforehand. Not much changes, except both you and Levi acknowledge there’s an added commitment as spouses. I think both of you would really cherish your new titles as spouses.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Levi doesn’t strike me as the type to give their S/O nicknames like babe, baby, etc. but I’m sure he’d have a specific nickname that only he uses for you. Other than that, just calling his partner by their name is enough.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Levi’s quite the stoic man, so while he presents that way to the rest of the world, his loved ones can actually see the difference between an “in love” Levi vs. a “not in love” Levi. It’s not that it’s a huge difference, he’s just softer somehow, and there’s more peace within his eyes, and he even smiles more. Levi’s not a huge fan of PDA, so he’s not prone to showing a lot of affection in front of others. In private, it’s a different story. Once he gets comfortable with affection, he’s more receptive and more giving. In front of others, he’s more comfortable holding hands or putting his hand on your back. He may not be a fan of PDA, but his eyes are on you frequently, and anyone who catches him looking at you can see how much he loves his partner.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Like I said above, not a fan of PDA. Doesn’t mean Levi’s secretive about his relationship at all. He’s proud to have his partner and proud to talk about his partner when the topic comes up. He’d be quite shy/uncomfortable kissing in front of others. Maybe not a fan of kisses on the lips, but he’d be more okay with forehead kisses, cheek kisses, etc.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Levi is so protective over his partner don’t @ me, and it just also means he’s naturally more attentive. He’d notice if your mood changes, he’d notice if something was “off” with you, he’d definitely remember you mentioning wanting something in passing and then gift it for your birthday/Christmas/a random Tuesday like MONTHS later. Memory of an elephant and more tuned into emotions than people give him credit for.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Again, not overtly romantic. Levi is a straightforward person, very practical, and very simple. But he’d give his partner the moon if he could. He believes in making things special, though, so I think he would actually put some thought/creativity in romantic actions rather than going for something cliché.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Oh absolutely. Levi is so supportive of his S/O and is happy to help with achieving any goal. He truly believes you can do whatever you put your mind to. You could lean on Levi for help with anything. He’s not one to make fun of your dreams. He’d just give his best advice and help you get a move on.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Levi definitely prefers routine. He’s a simple man with simple pleasures, and his whole life has been quite unpredictable, so he really loves the simple things in your relationship. Loves your morning routine, your night routine, loves weekly date nights. Of course, he’d enjoy trying new things with his partner, but he legitimately can’t get enough of what other might see as “mundane” parts of a relationship, because he thought he’d never get to experience that.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Levi knows his S/O like the back of his hand. He wants to know everything about them but is also respectful if it takes time for you to open up. He can be empathetic, but it takes time for him to get there tbh. He would be uncomfortable with blatant emotional conversations at first, just give him time. He just wants you to be comfortable with him at the end of the day and vice versa.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Levi’s S/O is so goddamn lucky tbh. He would never, ever take his partner for granted. He’s slow to get the hang of a serious relationship, that’s true, but he’s always trying his hardest to make the relationship be as good as it is. The best part is that Levi doesn’t lose himself in a relationship, however. He values his partner and prioritizes them, but you’d never catch yourself in a codependent relationship with this man. He wants you to be your own person and he wants that for himself, too. You’re one of his most important relationships, if not the most important one, but he understands that you are your own person and he is his own person.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Levi wears a ring with your initials carved on the inside.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

In public, again, not the most blatantly affectionate. In private, he’s more into it. He loves having his arms around you or vice versa. He just likes having the warmth of his partner there, doesn’t need to be something very sexual or very physical.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Levi would be more irritable if he’s without his S/O for some time imo. Have a week long trip you have to go on? He misses you more and more with each passing day, and he gets bitchier with each passing day. He does take it out on everyone else (poor fellas). If he’s not pissy, he’s otherwise quiet and just focuses on his own stuff until he sees you again.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Levi is extremely protective of his S/O and would literally put his life on the line for them. He’s kind of dramatic in that way, but he would rather suffer in your place any day. He would do anything for his partner.

[beameized]

On forcing American generalizations to Non-native English speakers

I feel this is beginning to be a problem in a lot of online spaces. Too many Americans assume that us non-native English speakers must follow their cultural nuances and practices just because we choose to speak English. What's worse is that some people downright assume we are "white privileged Americans" or are supporting racism because we don't blindly agree to their ideologies.

It is important to note though that these ideologies do hold some truth. I quite like some of them honestly but some Americans use them too loosely or generally when the generalizations' applicability only works within situations where the concerned parties are all from the USA. However, when used outside of the US especially in online international spaces, they just don't work. I'll go over some generalizations to make this point.

I. "Those who choose to be uninformed [about US issues] are on the side of the oppressors."

This line isn't wrong per se. There's a similar sentiment where I'm from too. The problem starts when it is applied to us who are not from the USA. Holding a countryman accountable for not being informed about the social issues in their country is justified. Holding someone oceans way though? Please think twice. Here are two examples to show the problem.

Example #1: A and B are both Americans. They are walking on the sidewalks of New York City. A rants about the white privileged guy at their workplace who not only stole their promotion but also boasted about his house and car even though the only reason he can afford a car and a house loan was cause his white and privileged dad co-signed the debt. B says the line above and A agrees.

Example #2: A and B (both from US) create a discord group. They limited the language to English. C joins and introduces himself as a transman. At some point, A starts talking about US racism and says the same line. C disagrees. They argue that this line is too general and can't be used loosely like that. A and B calls C a privileged white supremacist. C denied it. A and B said he has to show proof but C did not show proof. They eject C from the discord group. C is added to their public "racist" blocklist. However, C is actually from Saudi Arabia and also secretly seeing a bi woman there. He's busy trying to learn ways on how his rights as a queer person can be recognized while also hiding this fact he is SA, seeing a woman and also trans because otherwise might lead to capital punishment. Sharing info and being outed is a life and death situation for him.

In the first one, all parties involved are Americans and they all live in the USA. This is why using the line can apply generally because the context is that they are all Americans. As Americans, they have to be informed of issues, of white privilege and of the struggles of PoCs in a system that is against them.

In the second one, D isn't American. He is a SA transman. His reason for not being informed about US issues isn't because he's a white privileged man/oppressor. It is because he is also combatting the systematic oppression in his own country but can't reveal his nationality because it would get him persecuted by the law in their country. A and B just "assumed" he is white without taking into consideration other reasons why he doesn't want to share his personal information.

II. "If you don't listen to PoC [Americans], you are reinforcing systematic oppression [in the US]"

The voices of PoC Americans are the least heard by the US Government. This is why there is a push for the people to listen to them because only they can truly explain what social change in the USA is needed. The problem occurs when this is forced into online spaces that aren't within the scope of the US . Again, I will illustrate to make it easier.

Example#1: Z-game is an American-made game that features mainly black characters. Most characters use AAVE but the problem is that not a single character was voiced by a black person in spite of the industry not lacking in black voice actors who can speak AAVE much better and more naturally. The fans contact the executives (yes the executives because the VAs and the crew can't decide these things on their own it's the big guns making the shitty shots and you know it). They argue that since the characters are black people, it is better for them to be voiced by black people. The execs don't agree and the fandom makes it trend using the line above.

Example#2: Y-game is an indie game made by Indonesians. The game was good and it gained an international following. Now, a key character there is dark-skinned. Among its fans, Americans have been claiming that the dark-skinned character is black [American] and making clamor about it. However, Indonesian and other native Asian fans believed that the character is actually Papuan. This led to a rigorous fandom debate. Later, one of the devs said they always hc-ed the character as Papuan and took the time to talk about the racist abuses of the Indonesian government towards West Papua. Certain American fans then use the line above to shame the dev and the fans that support said dev.

In the first one, all the parties involved are American. The reason why there were no black voices heard (literally in the game) is because of systematic racism and how the American workplace favors White Americans over POCs. This is why the execs not listening the PoC Americans is reinforcing systematic racism.

In the second though, the game originated from Indonesia. Naturally, Indonesians would want to incorporate social issues that are happening where they are from or delve into content that represents their own grievances. The reason for not listening primarily to American voices isn't to reinforce systematic oppression in the US BUT to give more platform to systematic oppression in Indonesia.

III. "PoC Americans/immigrants are oppressed by white people so you have to give way to them"

This, again, works in a very American society. This is because the US government has historically and still continue to refuse providing support to PoC Americans as compared to white Americans. Hence, there is a need to really consider their demands. However, such cannot hold true in an international setting or outside of the US. This is because we aren't oppressing US immigrants or PoC Americans. There is no reason for us to give special credence to their judgment because the systematic oppression against them isn't necessarily present outside the US.

Example#1: A is a Mexican immigrant in the US. They live in one of the poorer neighborhood with old street lamps. One day, the bulb of one of the faulty street lights exploded and none of the street lights opened since then. They and other PoCs in the neighborhood went to the town mayor and demanded that the lights be changed immediately. The town mayor refused. A used the line above and mentioned how the place has basically a PoC community and that their safety shouldn't just be ignored just because they weren't white.

Example#2: B is a PoC American who moved to the Philippines because they noticed everything was cheaper there compared to the US. They rented an apartment in Bonifacio Global City and later wrote a book advertising how they built a life for their self here and how everything, even the rent, is super cheap. Later, it was found out that B illegally migrated there. They were deported. In their online account, they used the line above and bemoaned how they were kicked out for being a poor PoC immigrant. However, B makes no mention of how their actions contribute to Foreign gentrification of Filipino neighborhoods nor do they comment on how people like them from countries whose currency have more purchasing power are driving out overworked and underpaid Filipino employees from apartments by driving the prices up.

In the first example, A is justified in her actions. Her demand was made for the safety and benefit of the neighborhood. The reason why the upkeep of the neighborhood is bad in the first place was because the town mayor was discriminating against them.

In the second one though, there is no justification. Americans, yes even PoC Americans, are going to be more respected than your average Filipino. Such is the effect of US Imperialism and American privilege in the Philippines. 1USD is roughly exchangeable for 50PHP. Additionally, the Philippines used to be a US colony and its systematic oppression dynamics relies heavily on classism. The more money you have, the more people will try to please you. What B (a US citizen) did was use the difference in the purchasing power of the peso and the dollar. They, a US citizen (though yes discriminated in the US) exploit the classist system of the Philippines.

Q: Is it important to alleviate the struggles of PoC Americans that are suffering from systematic oppression in the US?

A: Yes, ofc.

Q: Is the way to do it allowing American gentrification of 3rd world countries by exploiting classism and the stronger purchasing power of the US Dollars?

A: I think you know how to answer this yourself

IV. "It's racism/anti-blackness. Stop calling it colorism."

In the US, anti-blackness or racism are serious problems. I can understand why Americans would put heavy emphasis on this but the problem is that not every country sees a division by race though they do see division by color. This is why colorism is preferred as a term rather than anti-blackness or racism for other countries. Let me illustrate.

Example#1: X is White American. Y is Chinese American. They are both bright kids at school. However, the teacher commends X for getting an "A-" in his math exam while she tells Y to work harder when she got the same score. Y rants to Z about it and is especially mad because their math teacher was also Chinese Americans and is racist. Z asks "hey, isn't this colorism? since you're both Chinese [American?]" Y tells Z the line above.

Example#2: A and B are both girls from India. A is light-skinned while B is dark-skinned. A is well-liked by everyone because they think she's pretty and she's considered the flower of their class while B is teased and bullied for being the darkest person in their class and that she's even darker than the boys. B, to vent her frustrations, goes online and talks about colorism and how it's a big issue in India. X, an American, chastises her and uses the line above.

In the first example, it is obviously racism. The teacher is reinforcing the racist stereotype that "Asians must be smart" so instead of lifting Y up, she puts more pressure on them while X, the white kid, is coddled and encouraged. The basis of the discrimination is a racist stereotype that's been reinforced on the mind of the teacher that "Asian [American] kids have to do better and have to be smarter" rather than "the US has to do better for Asian [American] kids." It's forcing of a standard based on a racial divide.

In the second example, the issue is colorism. Colorism is discrimination based on color when people aren't divided into races. In India and many other countries, there is no white, black, hispanic, asian, etc. ancestry that divide us. However, discrimination based on color still exist. This is why Colorism is used to address this issue in place of racism. It cannot also be anti-blackness either because it is a subset of US racism that specifically tackles racism towards black Americans.

V. "White people are the [only] supremacist or colonizers."

In the US, the oppressors are primarily white. This fact is unquestionable. However, outside of the US, it is entirely different. I won't give example scenarios because we have real ones right here.

During WW2, the US government put Japanese and other Asian Americans/US immigrants into concentration camps. They bombed Japan. The list of US war crimes is undeniable. Coupled with anti-blackness, it's evident in their actions that this is to assert white supremacy even if such action would endanger human lives. Surely, the phrase "white people are supremacist" fits this very narrative.

However, what is forgotten is that they are not the only people who are/have been supremacist. Japanese Imperialism is a thing that people from US/EU cannot think about but for us Native Asians, especially in South East Asia-- it's part of the history we study. Every year of my elementary class, I am reminded that Manila (our capital) was declared an open city (a city that abandoned all defensive efforts so that the invaders can peacefully occupy.) But you know what the Japanese did? They bombed us anyway. Colonized us. Raped our women. Took our grains. Ran our government like a puppet show. How can this not be colonization? How can this not be considered supremacist action? Why is it that Nazi Germany's actions are continuously scrutinized to this day but somehow everyone falls on deaf ears when the subject is Japanese imperialism?

Perhaps, it might seem only natural since the Philippines then was a US colony and Japan and US were at war. But you have to understand Japanese ideology at that time. They boasted about liberating Asia from white hands but they just wanted Asia for themselves-- you know, like how supremacists want to control everything and exploit everyone. They could discard a quarter of million lives in a single bombing on an open city like the US did with Nagasaki and Hiroshima, because they were supremacists too. Because being a supremacist isn't about being White. Being a supremacist is primarily about oppression and exploitation of other marginalized groups.

"White people are the [only] supremacist or colonizers" is one of the more dangerous generalizations in international platforms because it builds on a narrative that non-white people cannot and will never be supremacist or colonizers. This places abuses by non-white supremacist as nothing at all. And this placed Japan's supremacist actions on the backburner of WW2.

---- End of examples ----

I hope this gives people a little insight on matters outside of the US and how the reinforcement of US-centered ideologies does more harm than good to us Native Asians and other non-native English speakers. US people, please realize this.

Although, it is also good to note that these ideologies can also apply generally within another country. In India and the Philippines, the world "apolitical" (class privileged persons who refuse to engage in social politics because it doesn't affect their lifestyle) is used to criticized uninformed Indians/Filipinos. This is similar to USA's "Those who choose to be uninformed are on the side of the oppressors." This is why I said I liked some of them. Let's change the same generalizations I used earlier in other contexts to better illustrate.

I. "Filipino apoliticals who choose to be uninformed about PH issues are on the side of the oppressors."

II. "If you don't listen to the Kurdish, you are reinforcing systematic oppression by the Turkish government"

III. "Maori people are oppressed by European New Zealanders so you have to give way to them"

IV. "It's racism against Indians and Filipinos by Middle East Asians who see the former as disposable domestic servants. Stop calling it colorism."

V. "Japanese were the supremacist and colonizers of South East Asia in WW2. They also exploited Korea as a colony from 1910 up to the end of WW2. It's deplorable that the world seems to forget this."

See? With a little tweaking, these very same concepts echoes very real issues all over the world. They're good phrases for social change and accountability. However, expecting Americans to know all these foreign issues just doesn't work. Y'all busy trying to change systematic racism in the US. Absolutely understandable. Well, guess what? Everyone is clamoring to make changes for the better where they are from too. The examples I used are only some of them.

This is why you can't force generally American ideologies on us the same way we can't for our country's own budding ideologies. Assuming everyone who speaks English is American doesn't help either of us speak properly in an international platform where everyone wants the other to know their issues but at the same time can't obliged them.

Learning about all of the world's abuses is close to impossible. The closest we can do is not to shame or discredit others for not being informed in our own country's socio-political affairs. Intersectionality contemplates the world when in international spaces like the internet. Intersectionality includes everyone. So please think of everyone before you speak.

Disclaimer: yes, I know that there are other countries like the UK or Canada that also have systematic racism but I haven't seen them force their social ideologies and shame non-native English speaking people for not knowing things like how there is a trend of missing and murdered indigenous women in Canada or how there's too much UK propaganda saying systematic racism there doesn't exist there.

[isthatbloodonhisshirt]

hey, blood, question, if you don't mind. you always write with such great pacing and complete such lengthy works. (it's amazing). do you mind sharing how you plot and outline your stories?

Hello Anon! o/ 

First off, thank you very much, that’s very kind of you to say, thank you! ;~; 

Second, I would share with you, if I uh, had anything to share ^_^;; 

I am not a plot and plan and outline kind of person. I have tried, it never works. I can literally be like “here are the things I wanna do this chapter” and then do exactly zero of those things because my brain just... does what it wants |D 

I honestly think the easiest way to explain how I write is that I just keep moving forward. I know I’ve said this before, but it’s literally how I work. I will write something linearly, and while I’m writing if I get an idea like “oh, it would be super cool if this was a thing!” but I haven’t implied it up to that point, I don’t worry about going back right then and just keep writing as if I already had that one item there from the beginning. I just fix it up when I go back during editing to make sure everything works and fits as best I can. 

I think the problem a lot of people have (that I know, anyway) is that they get hung up on moving forward. They’ll get to a point and then second-guess something and go back and re-work everything that they already had. I don’t really do that. I will write, and if I don’t like something, of course I’ll fix it, but if I re-write something more than two times, then it means it’s probably not working for me and I usually end up scrapping it (I legit have one fic I have tried to re-write 4 times, each time getting up to about 50k before deciding I hate it. I’ve since permanently scrapped it, and that’s that. Sometimes you gotta give up on something if it’s not working). 

If you just write and keep going with your idea as it evolves, it’s always possible to go back and add in what needs to be added, but if you get an idea and immediately go back to try and add it in, you end up spending more time re-working what you already have as opposed to moving forward. So that’s kind of why I always tell people to just move forward. And one thing I learned that I know I’ve seen make its rounds on Tumblr from the original source is that if you know there’s a word or a scene or something but you can’t do it right then, don’t. Just put a note and come back to it later. If there’s meant to be an epic battle, or a steamy sex scene, or even a really emotional and difficult conversation that you can’t do in the moment, just make note and keep going. “[Epic battle happens here]” kind of thing and move on. You can always go back to fix something later, but you can’t move forward without moving forward. 

That’s about all I can say. It’s how I write, which I know doesn’t work for everyone, but hopefully it works for you if you’re looking to give it a go o/ <3<3<3<3<3<3

[juseki-taisen]

Ive watched the anime and that was some good shit right there. the mix of 3-D and 2-D animation is wonderful too! I would love to know how the 12 would treat their recently transitioned or in transition S/O because I hear “trans rights” coming from them

You bet your bottom dollar that they all scream TRANS RIGHTS!

Updated: Because I did Sharyu twice and forgot Nezumi. Sorry!

Inounoshishi

Dating Inounoshishi while transiting is actually ideal

Not only does she support you and whatever gender you want to be, but mama has money and is going to pay for it

You're her darling, why wouldn't she pay to keep you happy?

She's also going to take you shopping. She loves shopping and the idea of getting you a whole new wardrobe is to good.

Just be nice and say thank you, and show how much you appreciate her

Honestly? She never got to figure out who she really was/is as a person since she was always trying to please her parents. Seeing you figure out/announcing who you really are is really motivating for her.

Dotsuku

Doesn't have a problem with it.

May occasionally slip up on your pronouns, but always corrects himself immediately. After a week? Doesn't mess up again

Dog. Loyal. He's not about to let something like you being who you really are affect what he thinks of you.

Added bonus: His daughter just rolls with it. Kids aren't as stupid as people make them out to be. If you used to be a princess/prince, you're now the opposite. The real question is, what kind of super hero cape do you want?

Dostuku will help with your medical bills. If doctors give you shit for it, the man has connections. He will find a good doctor who respects you and get your surgery (if you so choose) taken care of

Niwatori

The whole idea of being trans is a little confusing at first for her, but it takes about 000.1 seconds for her to decide it doesn't really matter?

Her whole life she's been a tool for the family, with you she's a person. In the end, no matter how you identify, as long as you still love her that's what matters?

Does a TON of research. She gets books, medical journals, ect. She uses her contacts to find doctors for you, and don't worry. Cost isn't an issue.

Anyone who tries anything just...vanishes. You know from that weird smile she gets she 110% had something to do with it

If you ever feel ad or dysphoric about your body, she's very supportive.

Sharyu

She already knew. She's very perceptive, and was just waiting for you to be comfortable telling her.

The most supportive.

Does whatever she can to make you comfortable. If you want new cloths, she'll shop with you. If you're to embarrassed to go to a store, she'll order online.

Never uses the incorrect pronouns for you.

Will put one of those little trans flags in the window of her apartment.

If there's a pride event, will go with you.

Arranges a good doctor for your transition when you're ready, and will go to appointments if you're nervous

Hitsujii

He's old, and has seen it all. He may be older, but he's not going to question it.

One of those "Whatever makes you happy" people

Doesn't understand a lot of surgery details and hormone stuff. He'll try to research it, but you may have to help him learn terminology. He does catch on fast

The idea of surgery freaks him out because he has no control. He’d help you, but he is going to be silently panicking on the inside

Uuma

Actually really cool with it? Just tell him you still love him. The first thing he worries about is that you’re going to become this amazing you, and the you that loved him wont love him anymore

Really supportive? Doesn’t know a lot about trans issues, but he tries

He will probably buy you anything with the trans flag on it. 

If you have surgery, he’s going to make sure only the BEST doctors do it

Listens when you talk if you have feelings to get out. It just makes him really happy you’re confiding in him

Takeyasu

Trans? Cool. Fine. Help him pull off this heist

He really doesn’t care, if you’re happy he’s fine with it? 

Actually brings up frogs that can change their gender, and that there’s a species of lizards that reproduce without asexually. If reptiles do it, why can’t people?

Gives you money for surgery if you wanna get it. Worries through the entire thing, but only Nagayuki knows about his brother internal freak out

Also, shopping spree. Criminal shopping spree. grab and RUN

Has trouble using the correct pronouns, but tries really hard and corrects himself. 

Nagayuki

He already knew way before you told him. He’s perceptive, smart, and also finds your online content. Really, he was just waiting for you to tell him yourself

Probably gets you a tray of cupcakes with the frosting colored with the trans flag colors. He likes snacks, any excuse to get snacks and make you happy? Killing two birds with one stone

Master of your pronouns and possibly your new name

You know how hard it is to change your name? This dude hacks into the systems and does it in a night. 

Helps you get surgery if you want it. Not emotional about it, but will hold your hand if you want him to. 

Ushii

Help him. He doesn’t understand trans when you first bring it up, but when you explain it clicks

Now he is fully on board and ready

While he can’t keep up with a lot of LGBTQ+ terms, he supports you and what makes you happy. You want to be the gender you’ve always wanted? No problem. Just tell him what he needs to do

Has fought someone who purposely misgendered you before. 

Will take you shopping if you’d like

You want surgery? He knows people. Honestly? He’s so well known that the doctors are volunteering to make sure it gets done properly.

Never once messes up your pronouns.

Tora

She’s seen so much on the battlefield that when you tell her, she’s not that concerned. It’s great that you trust her, and she will support you but...You’re not going to leave her, right? 

Cuzz she loves you with all her heart and if someone like you can become every more yourself (and therefor more amazing) why would you stay with a screw up like her?

After she gets past her insecurities, Tore is very supportive of you

Has punched a guy in the face for being rude to you. Maye have started a street brawl over it, it’s fine. She won.

Surgery freaks her out no matter what is it, but she’s going to be there if you want it. She may just cry when you can’t see her. What if something goes wrong???

It wont and you’re fine but you wake up and she’s crying like a BABY

Usagi

This...is kind of a disaster? Not in the way you’re thinking

He gets all your pronouns right, and quickly is VERY excited to call you his new girl/boy friend. 

But uh...people may die...A lot of people

If he notices that people give you weird looks, they’re dead. He will FIGHT and MURDER people who are transphobic (but what’s the loss really?)

Loves to shop with you, and tries to pull things he thinks you’d like (probably kills people there too, RIP)

If you want the surgery, you have to do the research. Usagi doesn’t get it. HOWEVER he will help pay...sort of

“It’s expensive”

“Will this cover it?” Proceeds to pull out diamonds and gold bars, and...is that a rare species of monkey? WHERE DID HE GET A MONKEY?

How do you even exchange that for money?

Imagine going to pride with Usagi. 

Snuggling with Usagi if you have body dysphoria. Him not really understanding everything but 110% being willing to support you. 

Neuzmi

Already knew. Not a huge deal for him. 

Supportive, but really casual about it

He’s great with pronouns, and does use his ability a lot to try and make sure he doesn’t say something to make you uncomfortable

always quick to apologize if he does. 

[dracothedeatheatingcupcake-ao3]

Hey, what about "fuckin"

Since.. you know it's mondo haha, laugh.

Dude, I straight up looked up how many times I used the word f*ck (yes, I censor my curses when I'm not writing fic. Yes, I understand how silly that is) because I was curious earlier, and it was well over 5,000 times (5,664, to be exact), including past and future tenses. The fic so far is 250,000 words. That means 2% of this fic is just the word f*ck. Sh*t was used about 2,500 (2,592 exactly) times, d*mn 600 times (less than I thought, to be honest, since that includes godd*mn, which had about 500 alone), d*mmit 37 times, and b*tch 41 times. Mondo is a foul mouth little boy who needs some gosh darn soap for his gosh darn potty mouth.

Because of this, I legit don't think I can do this request. I can straight up take any given paragraph and use it, ha. The only time I use f*ckin' in the story is during dialogue, most of which is shown in TPWP. But you know what? I'll take a look during the scenes that are unique to this story, ones without Taka, and see what I can find. I was curious if anyone would try a curse word, though, ha.

UPDATE: OH MY GOD I JUST LEARNED THAT MY HUGE FILE FOR ALL OF TPWM DIDN'T HAVE TWO CHAPTERS. WHICH MEANS THIS STORY IS EVEN LONGER THAN I THOUGHT. SORRY, I'M JUST FLOORED BY THIS. TPWM IS ACTUALLY 20K SHY OF 300K WORDS. TPWP ONLY HAD A LITTLE UNDER 200K WORDS BY THE SAME POINT IN THE PLOT. I'M SORRY TO DERAIL HERE, BUT I'M HONESTLY TERRIFIED BY THE LENGTH OF TPWM. HELP.

As it stands, the f*ck total has gone up to 6,299 instances. Mondo used the word f*ck 634 times in two chapters. I....... may have over done it with curses. Oop.

Anyway! I found a scene from a chapter that I added to TPWM since it got too long to go where it went in TPWP and I split it into it's own chapter. This chapter is why TPWM goes from two chapters out of order with TPWP to one in my little explanations for where these segments come from. It occurs right before the fall festival, when Mondo is waiting for Taka to finish getting the festival ready. I added quite a bit to have it all make sense, so it's a a pretty substantial segment. I also think I may have updated this chapter from what I have on my computer, I'll have to check my phone's note app later, but this should be fine for these purposes. Just know it may be different when I actually post in several months, since I recall extensively updating this chapter, but not if I emailed myself the document with the updated version. I hope y'all like!

send me a word & i’ll post a sentence from my WIP that contains that word

Fuckin': “Okay, then tell me... what /is/ your type, huh? ‘Cuz we’ve been friends for two months now and I can’t figure that shit out. You say that Maizono is hot, but too high maintenance. You say Chi is pretty, but too timid. And every other chick we talk about gets the same treatment! Always some problem or other. What chick could possibly hold up to your impossible fricken standards? Maybe that’s why you can’t score a date. You’re too picky. And don’t fricken get offended, I’m just saying, shit.”

Mondo clenches his fists again, the anger inside him rising. /Again/. He glares at Leon bitterly, his insides squirming with his rising rage. Fuck, does he want to let that shit out and just fucking /scream/ at this jackass. To not be forced to listen as his so called ‘friend’ insults him. But... he’s been doing his best to work on shit like this. On not exploding over simple shit. Taka always is saying careless things that sound rude on the surface, but actually aren’t, so he’s had to practice not blowing up over tiny slights. But it sure as shit is a close thing... Leon sure is lucky Mondo is friends with Taka and that he is trying to learn to control his anger, shit...

“Okay, this is your last fucking warning. Shut the /fuck/ up! So what, I know what I like?! Not everyone is fuckin’ content chasin’ after anythin’ with legs! God fuckin’ /dammit/, shit!” Mondo curses, fighting to keep his voice level down. Leon is glaring at him now, and Mondo is more than content to glare back. But if that motherfucker says /one more thing/...

Luckily, again, Leon seems to realize this. It takes him a moment, but soon he is sighing, his shoulders relaxing from the tense bunch and his face no longer all pinched and angry. Hrm...

“Shit, man. I’m not trying to offend, goddamn. I just mean... seriously. What /is/ your type? Maybe if you tell me, I can try and help you find someone who matches. Or is at least close, shit... ‘cuz seriously, man. You honestly don’t seem interested in chicks, not gonna lie.”

Shit. Shit. /Shit/, the fuck does he fucking mean by that?! Not... not interested in chicks?! Is he- is he trying to- to /imply/ something, is he- h-he-

Mondo’s racing thoughts get interrupted by Leon again, the teen’s voice softer than it had been, though it still holds a hint of agitation.

“I can see you fricken overthinking over there. Look, I know I say shit that can be considered rude, but I would have thought you’d know by now that I don’t fricken mean it that way. I’m not trying ta insult you. I just wanna help. Okay? Shit...”

Okay. Okay, okay. Mondo... /did/ know that, yeah. It’s one of the reasons he still isn’t sure if he actually enjoys hanging around Leon or not, as big a douchebag as he can be. But the teen has some good parts and does seem to like hanging out with him... plus, it ain’t like Mondo’s not the exact same, so it would be fucking hypocritical if he were to get angry at the teen for it... ugh. Fine. /Fine/. He won’t get angry. /This time/.

“Ugh. Whatever, dude. But I am, alright? Interested in chicks. I ain’t fuckin’ gay! Not that there’s any fuckin’ problem in bein’ gay, but I fuckin’ ain’t! But since ya asked... fine. I’ll tell ya. But if you fuckin’ laugh at /anythin’/, I will straight up knock you the fuck out, don’t think I won’t!” Mondo growls, glaring at Leon again.

Leon rolls his eyes at the bluster, but nods readily enough, leaning in so their conversation can be a bit more private. Ugh... fine. Here goes nothing...

“Just... I don’t want a fuckin’ one night stand or shit like that, okay? When I look fer chicks, I’m lookin’ fer someone I think I can, ya know... /be with/. Fer longer than a fuckin’ night. Daiya always had some chick or other in his room, an’ he seemed ta enjoy that kinda shit, was always polite an’ kind ta them and they were polite an’ kind back, but I... I never fuckin’ wanted that shit. Seemed... I dunno. Empty ta me. I always wanted somethin’ with more substance than that. So... I got my standards. Things I know would ruin a long-term relationship if a chick did or didn’t have it. Unlike what most people think, I do fuckin’ know what I’m like, shit. Ain’t exactly the easiest person ta talk ta or be close ta, an’ I fuckin’ know that. So just... shit. Fuckin’...”

Mondo feels discomfort rise inside him, absolutely /hating/ the goddamn /vulnerability/ he’s showing right now. He can feel that discomfort turning to rage, his body wanting so bad to flip the table and scream up a storm and head out to his baby and ride until he can’t ride no more, but before he can, Leon... Leon replies. Shit...

“Huh. That... that makes sense, shit. Didn’t realize ya’d be that kinda guy, but I get it, man. Ain’t no shame in it. Some dude’s just want commitment, an’ while I don’t personally care, I can respect that. But, uh... thanks for telling me that. Know ya don’t like saying shit like that, heh,” Leon mumbles, looking a little awkward, but mostly genuine. Fucking... huh. Wouldn’t have expected /that/ from the musician. It helps settle something inside of Mondo, making the anger fade. A little. Enough so he isn’t standing and storming off, at least.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Stop bein’ a little bitch ‘bout it,” Mondo mumbles back, his cheeks warm. Leon snickers, leaning across the table to push against Mondo’s shoulder, playfully.

“Alright, whatever. But dude, come on! Tell me. What is your type? You’re being so cryptic, shit. If we’re gonna act like goddamn school girls, might as well go all fricken out, shit. What, ya only like chicks who are cross eyed or something? I mean, hey, if that’s your thing-“

“Oh, shut up, ya jackass,” Mondo laughs, shoving back, snickering at the ridiculous fucking eyebrow wiggle Leon does. Bastard.

After a moment, Mondo sobers up and lets out a forceful sigh, his shoulders tensing at the question. He doesn’t like talking about shit like this, damn. It always embarrasses him, even though it’s perfectly natural to have a type, ya know? But... ugh. Fine. Dudes talk about this shit, he knows that. His gang would always talk about shit like this, talking about what kind of chicks (or dudes, for those who favored dick) they liked. It ain’t anything to be embarrassed about, right? Shit...

“But ya know what? Fine. I’ll tell ya. Again, laugh an’ ya’ll regret it, but... I’ve got a few standards that matter most. First, chick has ta be hot, duh. Or at least she’s gotta care ‘bout her ‘ppearance, ya know? Ain’t gonna date a chick who don’t put any care inta how she looks, shit. Second, she, uh... she’s gotta care ‘bout shit. Like... she’s gotta have drive or shit like that. Somethin’ she‘s passionate ‘bout. Can’t have someone who is just... passive, ugh. Third... shit. I dunno, she’s gotta... gotta be patient an’ shit. Understandin’. ‘Cuz, ya know... ‘m kind ofa fuckin’ douchebag, heh. Shit...”

Mondo pauses for a second, hating how warm his cheeks feel, but Leon isn’t looking at him weird. He just... shit. Looks thoughtful and shit. Hmm... whatever, don’t fucking matter. Taking a deep breath, he averts his eyes and continues.

“Fourth... she’s gotta- gotta... gotta be fuckin’ kind. Nice, ya know? Don’t wanna be stuck with a stuck up bitch, goddamn. An’ this ain’t a make ‘r break thing, but I’d like her ta care ‘bout other people an’ shit. Wanna help others. Shit like that. An’... an’ fin’lly, uh... she’s gotta have her own mind. Her own ‘pinions. Can’t be afraid ta say what she thinks. Maybe even be a little stubborn, ta even out my stubborn ass. There’s some other, smaller stuff, but mainly... shit. Main thing is, she’s gotta be able ta put up with me. Which, uh... ain’t exactly easy, shit. Now, ya fuckin’ satisfied? Gotta tell ya my preferred sex positions or somethin’, or can we let this shit drop now? God fucking damn...”

Mondo looks up at Leon then, his insides a fucking /mess/. Fuck, but he hates being open like this. If he were talking to /Taka/, then shit, that shit would be just fine. Taka don’t ever fucking judge, he’s too fucking nice for that. But he ain’t talking to Taka. And Leon... while he’s a decent guy at times, he can be the biggest fucking douchebag at others. And Mondo is honestly tired of getting angry every five seconds, shit.

However... the look Leon is giving him is hard for him to decipher, even as good as he is at that kinda shit. He... he is definitely giving Mondo a Look, but what it means is just... baffling. He honestly looks kinda... constipated, the fuck...?

“Holy shit. Okay... shit. /Shit/. I... I know this is gonna make ya lose your shit, but ya know what? Whatever. We’re friends an’ I think /someone/ has gotta say this shit ta you, at least once.” What... the fuck... Mondo is getting super fucking freaked, especially at the kinda panicked but also /determined/ look that is rising on the musician’s face, which is... so fucking concerning... “But... damn. Ya- y-you do realize... shit. You do realize that you /straight up/ just described Ishimaru... right? L-like... every single thing ya said matches the tightass to a fricken /tee/. Well, outside of the ‘hot’ one, but I guess he does seem to care about his appearance, s-so there is that. But, uh... shit. He’s got drive, he cares about people, he can be patient and he sure as shit can be stubborn... ain’t afraid ta say his mind... almost a little too unafraid of that, h-heh... an’ he, uh... he most definitely seems more than capable of putting up with your ass, goddamn. U-uh... ya know. Shit like that...”

Holy... shit. Holy, goddamn, motherfucking /shit/!

Mondo is fucking /frozen/ again, eyes wide as they glare at the table, unable to meet Leon’s /goddamn/ stare. Because... n-no. That ain’t... /no/, fucking... /no/. W-while yeah, Taka /is/ all of that shit, it’s not... it doesn’t mean anything! That- that’s just why they work so well together, that’s it! Just because the kid checks all his boxes means nothing! He... he ain’t fucking gay, shit! How many goddamn times does he gotta /say that shit before people realize he fucking means it, god fucking damn/-

(Occurs during chapter 12 of TPWM, corresponding kind of with the end of chapter 13 and the beginning of chapter 14 of TPWP. Also, I have no idea what male friends talk about. Girls? Do they... do they talk about girls???)

[washymylifeaway]

SunaOsa fanfic recs: valentines edition~~

SunaOsa is one of my all time favorite ships and this past month, there has been/was an exchange going on between writers (here is the link) and artists (separately) and because I don’t have a life (or maybe it’s just that SunaOsa is my life LOL), I’m here to tell you some of my favorite fics from the pile :D However, as much as I love a ship, sometimes fluff is too asajndajnd so mind you there will probably be a lot of good fics missing just cause I couldn’t get myself to read more fluff (or angst) LOL (IM SORRY but sometimes I also just can’t motivate myself to read a fic no matter how good it looks OOPS).

As always, please check warning and tags before reading any of these fics, and take care of yourselves!!!!

In no particular order (jk the order is last updated haha) tho my favorites will have *** next to them :)

***glass stained black by unrequitedangst (E) 31k // Mafia AU’s are some of my favorite kinds of fics, and this one did not disappoint! The character development of Osamu is really legit and despite being mafia, it’s not that heavy or angst of a fic (but you should still definitely read tags and warnings first). It’s an Osamu heavy fic, and if you’re into reading him being stupid, go right ahead LOL.

redux by catalysis (T) 2.3k // ngl I hate break-up fics with a passion truely (when you can’t handle fluff or angst what to do) but I liked the concept for this one hehe (so I made myself suffer LOL). It was short, but cute !!! and the unspoken words really hit me in the FEELS (so what I’m dramatic fight me LOL).

Impropriety by DeathBelle (T) 5.7k // royalty~ I love the banter between them in this fic and we DO stan respectful Osamu yes we do <33333 The relationships between not only SunaOsa but SunaAtsu (because even though it isn’t really SunaAtsu best friend agenda, I can delude myself into think it is okay :/) are done so well and so nice he’s mean Osamu is best Osamu.

***what are you waiting for? by Slumber (T) 3.7k // MIGHT BE MY FAV FIC FROM THIS EXCHANGE!!! It made me cackle and I love how they learn new things about each other!!!! Like the development is so good and Suna is really doing the MOST!! Also, I love recursive endings AHHHHHH!

agape by sketchedsmiles (T) 11.7k // soulmates, then they were SOULMATES! (ik that’s not how it goes but pls just humor me LOL) This fic really depicted Osamu’s insecurities/internal turmoil/overthinking really well and the realization he has vs Suna’s AHJAFKASFJ. I love confident Suna.

fireside by tartaglia (starkartifices) (T) 3.6k // we do love the subtle flirt flirt don’t we hehe ;) It’s short, it’s fluff, and it’s funny - what more could you ask for? Also whats a vigilante fic if there isn’t at least one pun about being a vigilante LOL.

Over and Over Again by tookumade (G) 6.4k // I would like to order one reassuring, reliable Miya Osamu for myself please and thank you :((( The way the relationship is so GOOD like both Suna and Osamu pick each other up and they know the other has their back ajfhkajdfl. I would purchase all the onigiri with the deal Suna was proposing ;) Onigirintarou.

from here to eternity by TheGlovedArtist (T) 6.6k // I for one am a big fan of mythology and stuff (heroes of olympus but like IDR any of the plot LOL) so of course I read this fic. The snark appearances of Sakusa and Komori gave me LIFE and the difference in descriptions from Astumu and Kita cracked me up. This is another respectful Osamu fic (yes I love these) and in this one it was a ‘I save you as much as you save me’ type beat LOL. Gotta love rings.

***Subtle Inarizaki Dating by sifuhotman (T) 15.2k // THIS ONE. Even if you don’t read the whole thing, I beg of you, please, I AM ON MY KNEES, read the SID for Astumu. It is worth the loss of all your brain calls I guarantee it. It made me giggle so freakin much. Suna might be an A-Hole but he’s OUR A-Hole <3

Forever Begins with 8 Seconds by subtlehues (T) 3.9k // FLUFF hehe, I love their dynamic in this one it’s very good and cute and everything great! Also, I am all for the head cannon that Suna cannot cook, yes pls. Also SUPERPOWERS whooooooooh.

***try again, and again, and again by rosegoldwriting (T) 2.6k // SOULMATES! If you ever wanted a specific soulmate AU! for SunaOsa look no further, it probably comes out LOL. I love this concept of them just being like ‘WTF’ everyday, it gives me life. Also, count how many soulmate AU’s you recognized because I just thought about it and I think it’d be fun LOL. (I went back and I think 11 but I’m not sure LOL)

let us burn by SilverMoonT (G) 13.5k // I am always up for a nice vampire Osamu and witch Suna (which believe it or not, is my second one because I read the other one by this writer LOL) This one is more Suna POV and it really goes into his fears and desires, and I like the way Osamu pushes him to live more freely.

***reasons to microwave an elixir by spiritscript (T) 8.2k // THIS ONE. UGH I love, and it’s funny and cute and it EVEN HAS CRIME (kinda not really but yes)! I love the quiet moments they have and the PET AHHHHHHH! We love medic Osamu :DDDDD But also the betrayal and the sparring (and the irony at the end LOL) AJSKJNFK.

we fall between by stringendos (T) 14.7k // honestly the entire time I was just screaming at my computer, begging for them to hurry up and realize, but alas this is a ~slow burn~ for a reason and the tag ‘exes who act like theyre married’ really is the reason I read it and I do not regret LOL. Also bless Matsuda and stan her.

All the Time in the World by minie_ai (M) 8.8k // we love immortality! Denial! And Suna mentally filing away blackmail against people (namely Astumu) LOL. Running away from your problems is always the answer (I am saying this is a not sarcastic manner because I too, run away from my problems LOL) but ramen is ALWAYS a good answer. We love ourselves some emotional constipation LOL.

***none but you by broikawa (T) 7.2k // everything is a competition always LOL, not that I’m complainin but still LOL EVERYTHING. I really love this one because I love the progression and cock-block SakuAtsu hehe. I love them being synchronized idiots <3

it all comes back to you, (my home) by iritaescents (T) 4.5k // FOREVER, WE STAN FOREVER. Anyway, LOL this was is very very cute and fluff and not slow burn, it fast burn LOL. It’s a cute fic to read and it even has our favorite, now say it with me SOULMATES LOL.

Can't help falling in bed with you by tirralirra (T) 6.7k // here we see a 5 + 1 with points for the title (I think it’s very funny LOL my humor is bad ;)) Not that it really needs extra points because it’s a great fic in itself LOL but I really liked the title so I felt the need to share this with you all (OOPS). This was so cute, and the + 1 is HILARIOUS.

It’s no longer up :(((((( -> love's consequences by xginpuff (T) 6.5k // WARNINGS AND TAGS been a while since we had an angsty fic in this list (LOL the way I just tried to avoid all of them hehe). I read the tags but ngl I was still surprised later LOL maybe I’m just dumb, but anyway IK it starts out a bit confusing, but after you read more, you’ll get into it!

***sunagashi by bastigod (T) 9.8k // if there’s anything I like more than mythology, it’s folklore LOL. I love this fic and the plot is written so artfully AHDSAJN. Also the scene with the Ume-chan and her comment (so snarky I love). Also they way I went through so much trouble trying to figure out the kanji LOL (SPOILER it’s miyarin hehe)

catch me (while i'm still runnin') by lunarins (T) 4.3k // first and foremost, may we have a moment of silence for Komori and his eyebrows..... Continuing, this fic was so good because I love a good heist hehe. Their slight of hand abilities really doing the most LOL, and the ending OMG. I love the way the writer added in how they appeared to others during the heist, it really made it so good! Ugh to have a painting class and almost die LOL.

***if we get this right by Slumber (G) 5k // OLD FRIEND plsplspls I love this fic and I love how Osamu slowly relearns who he knew Suna as AHHH. The ending, again UGH, I really loved it and their banter with one another.

The Study of Suna Rintarou by DeathBelle (T) 6.1k // PLEASE the way Osamu kept getting offended omg. But also the effort Suna puts into getting to know Osamu, I was in ~love~. Read to me Osamu, READ TO ME. But also the Osamu is an oblivious MF agenda is alive and well within this fic hehe.

Take a Hint by pancake_surprise (G) 2.3k // ok so I had just read a tumbr post about the one bed thing and then I saw this fic. It was like the stars aligned okay? I was like, ig I HAVE to read it now hehe. But seriously read it, it’s cute and like everything else, of course there’s a challenge to be made LOL.

Heatwave by pancake_surprise (G) 2.1k // the way they were dating without knowing they were dating man. The tag ‘Didn't Know They Were Dating‘ more accurate than the ‘first dates’ one LOL jk but actually tho am I kidding? It’s the first official one IG. LOL anyway, we do love the doin of the defining of relationships. Yup.

If you made it all the way down here, CONGRATS LOL. Like I said, I didn’t read all of them (sadly) and these were the ones i did read LOL. I might add more depending on whether I can motivate myself into reading fics I know will be good LOL so we’ll see heh. Honestly, I thought I was gonna get word counted, but YAY we finished (for now hehe). Also sorry for any possible typos (is this no beta we die like men?) I’m running on 90 min of sleep so my engrish be strugglin LOL. Be safe and wear masks :)

[votederpycausemufins]

Alright, chapter 2 for the Summoning Family sequel ‘Surprisingly Familiar’. As you could see, I added a character that some of you may not know about, but was the first MCYTer I ever watched as he started uploading in mid 2010.

And now I finally decided to add him in since he knows a number of the hermits from other things he’s done. If you’re looking for stuff to watch, you could watch his old series to get some lore or just for fun.

anyway, onto the story.

“Alright Paul, what was that back there?!” Jrum heard through the door. “You’re the older one, where’s that older sibling wisdom of yours?”

“It’s trying to get rid of the spy and knowing to be careful around Xelqua. He was involved in the Tokyo High School Murders a number of years ago. That’s how I even knew about him to tell you about it.”

“You sent me a letter! That was important enough for you to call or something!”

“I couldn’t at the time. Besides, when he went missing, I thought it was because you found him and took him away, but it turns out he was off on his own doing who knows what.” Paul sighed. “Look, I know some of the hermits from Minecrack, and usually they help with things, but this is different. At the very least from what I’ve heard, the one guy named Iskall has been on the up and up, but Xelqua’s started a war!”

“Apparently actually two.”

“Phil, you know that’s worse. Some of the things the papers said… he should be in prison, not here.”

“Right, and how many times did you go to prison again?” Phil asked, raising an eyebrow.

“That’s different. I was framed once, it was minor another time, and the rest was just from breaking out of prison so they put me back into a better one. They finally gave up when they didn’t have anything left I couldn’t escape.”

“Well I should show you Pandora’s Vault then.” Phil said, before shaking his head to clear his thoughts. “Back on topic. You can’t treat Grian that way. You got all your information from newspapers but I’ve got some myself. It’s not like he’s the only one on my side of the family to cause wars. And whatever happened in Tokyo wasn’t something he wanted to do, I’ve seen the signs of it. So you’re going to go back in there, apologize, and leave unless they actually somehow want you to stay.”

“Wait, there’s one more thing you need to hear.”

“Oh really?” Phil asked sarcastically. “What the fuck could possibly be so important compared to everything else you did back there and needing to apologize for it?”

“Give me a second. Someone’s at the door. Might be the chicken.”

“I don’t think that spy is-” And then it was completely silent. Jrum was taken aback by that, testing the door, but it was locked. He tried enhancing his hearing, but that didn’t work either. Then, he tried to remember if there was anything he could get into the redstone of and hack, and he was pretty sure there was. So the bot made his way to the side of the room and found a line in, doing what he could to listen in.

“-because it makes sense. Punch is dangerous enough without his spies.” Jrum smiled as he heard Paul’s voice again. “If those guys keep showing up he might as well. I tried visiting you, but the place was abandoned and chickens were swarming the place.”

“Then you should have called!” Phil shouted, obviously sounding frustrated.

“Letters are the only guarantee I have. If you would just write back-”

“I’m not using magic paper unless I know who enchanted it.”

“Hoodie always enchants it!” Jrum mentally took note of the name, hoping someone else would know more about whoever that was

“How can I be sure?”

“How could I be sure you weren’t all dead when the caste was abandoned?”

“You could have fucking called!” And there was a slam which made Jrum jump, losing his connection to the room. He scrambled to reconnect, surprised to find he was having more trouble this time, but eventually, he did connect again.

“-ause Grian was taking care of it. I know you want to hate him, but maybe don’t freak out at just seeing him.”

“I’ll think about it Phil, but as long as Koka’s around, I’m going to be careful.”

“Wait, how do you know it’s name?” Phil asked, confused.

“You heard it hissing, didn’t you?” Paul asked. “That’s the only one he’s got that does that. That’s why I’m trying to be cautious.”

“Okay, I can sort of see why now. But can you please still try with Grian? He’s had a rough enough life as it is and you don’t need to make it worse.”

There was a sigh from Paul. “Alright, but you’ve also got to promise me something yourself.”

“And what’s that?”

“Maybe the person listening in can tell us, but if not, I’m going to see if-”

Jrum pulled away, cutting off what he was hearing. He scrambled to fix everything then run back to the party, trying to calm his breathing when he was finally back with everyone else.

.

.

.

Mumbo stood by as Grian kept setting up a comfort nest in Barge HQ. He was doing his best to keep the bots’ pet chicken from getting in Grian’s way, but that ended up with plenty of pecking targeting his arms and legs. If he hadn’t recognized the red on the bird’s beak as redstone dust left on his suit, he would have panicked thinking it was blood. Or maybe it was, so he quickly checked.

The redstoner didn’t seem to have wounds that drew blood, which was good, but he did take his eyes off of Kokatori, who was nearly at Grian’s nest of blankets. Mumbo quickly ran over and picked the bird up, looking around to see if he could get some sort of cage for it. There wasn’t really, but there were glass windows. So he simply used a few blocks to keep the chicken in place, glad it wasn’t left completely in the dark.

Sighing about taking care of the problem, Mumbo looked back over to Grian, who was still fiddling with blankets even though the nest looked complete. “Grian?” Mumbo tried to ask softly, but the avian still jumped at the speech. “Sorry for startling you. How are you feeling?”

“Honestly? Like crap. There’s not a lot of good stuff from growing up after I went missing. Sure, there’s stuff here and there, but a lot of it after everything that’s happened is just tainted. And now it’s getting worse, like finding out d- Phil started acting worse to Tommy, and now apparently one tv show that is partially responsible for me being alive was made by my uncle who knew about me and hates my guts.”

Mumbo put a hand on Grian’s back, the currently puffed up wings ruffling a bit before calming back down a little bit. “Well, he seems to know a good number of the other hermits. I’m sure they can change his mind about you.” Then Mumbo stepped over the wall of blankets to sit next to Grian. “And they may know him and be his friends, but last I checked, he hasn’t been around for a bit any you definitely have. Even Xisuma has called you the missing puzzle piece of the hermits. Without you, it just doesn’t feel right.”

Grian smiled a little and leaned on Mumbo’s shoulder. “Thanks, I needed to hear that.”

Mumbo nodded, then paused for a moment to ask a question. “You said he’s part of the reason you’re alive?”

Grian nodded. “He had a survival show. He used stuff from knives to swords to guns. The one I had to use wasn’t really legally obtained and so there wasn’t an instruction manual.”

“Grian, are you telling me you watched a tv show to learn how to use a… a firearm?”

Grian smiled. “Yep! And some other stuff as well. You’ll never know how many ways I know how to dispose of a body.”

Mumbo stared wide eyed at the builder, who was giving a mischievous little smile. “Grian. Grian you’re joking, right?” He didn’t stop smiling or even answer. “Grian, please tell me that’s a joke! Grian!”

As they continued to talk, Kokatori finished pecking at the glass, having cut a rough circle into it. The bird held a foot up and pushed the area, the cut portion breaking away cleanly and falling to the ground far below.

The chicken waited, trying to see if anyone had heard the sound and would react, but that didn’t seem to be the case. With that taken care of, it jumped out of the window, gliding down to the ground. It landed right near the entrance to Jrum’s party building, landing on the ledge of a window. Kokatori looked inside and saw the various party members. The first robot seemed to be fine, the second one more nervous. Odd, what did it have to be nervous about? But then the chicken saw Paul and that ‘brother’ of his were back in the room. Well, maybe the second robot was more of an asset.

The chicken carefully walked over to Jrum, carefully pecking his leg to get his attention. It didn’t want to scare him since it had seen that Jrum wasn’t the most fond of it, but it was surprised to see Jrum gladly pick it up. “Oh, you’re not supposed to be in here! That new person doesn’t like chickens like you, so let’s go outside.”

Kokatori held in a hiss. Great, it was just going to be put back outside. But at the very least the robot was picking it up without looking sick or something. When they were back outside, Kokatori expected to be set down or even dropped, but instead it was spun around so it was looking right at Jrum.

“Alright then. You’re not a normal chicken. So what are you?” Jrum asked, interrogating the chicken. “I mean, it’s obvious they’re right about you being some sort of spy, but there’s something else, isn’t there?”

Kokatori didn’t know if chickens could sweat, but it sure felt like it was right then. But it tried not to show how anxious it was and just clucked.

“I’m taking that as a yes because it doesn’t sound as bad as a no. The new guy knows your name. Nobody told him your name but he knew it. And said you were ‘his’ chicken.” Jrum said, remembering what he had listened to. “He said that was because of your hissing and that you’re the only one that does that. And as far as I know, he’s right and chickens don’t hiss.”

If Kokatori wasn’t sweating before, it was now. Normally that would be filtered out by the mind. Of course that king and his brother knew enough to resist it, but no one else seemed to notice until now this thing. So, it used the foolproof plan of clucking again.

“Right, they don’t, so why are you?” Jrum asked. Alright, clucking had not worked. It hadn’t worked at all. This was bad. But it could be fixed, right? The robot didn’t like chickens because of… because of… right! Because of eggs! So Kokatori quickly had an egg pop out, which was enough to spook the robot and make them run off. Which was good. He didn’t need to take a closer look.

With no one around, Kokatori stomped on the egg, breaking the dark green and cream spotted shell. No one needed to see that. There were already two people around here that knew what was going on, and that was already too many.

It looked back up at the building it had fallen from. It would be easy enough to get back to the top. It just hoped its short escape wouldn’t be noticed. It grabbed the piece of glass it had let fall to the ground, thankfully unbroken, and started climbing up the outside of the building.

Kokatori reached its pitiful excuse for a prison and put the piece of glass back. It clucked a little to remind the two people it was still there, but they mostly ignored it. That was fine. It had work to do anyway.

.

.

.

Tommy watched Paul as he walked over to Xisuma. Sure, he had heard of his uncle from Phil here and there. Mostly complaining about lack of contact and too many letters, which were complete opposites, but it was back when Tommy wasn’t really the loud teen he was today, still affected by how his family looked down on him for unknowingly being too much like his missing brother.

If Grian had been there and told him to suck it up, Tommy’s sure he would. It would be very reluctant, but it was Grian, who was like the one family member he still had a good standing with. Well, obviously also the bots. And Mumbo sort of counted. And all the hermits were honorary family. But he meant in the official sense.

But Grian wasn’t here, specifically because of Paul. And since Tommy was only really okay with Grian, it made him more wary of this being another family member that was going to put him down. If that was going to be the case, he at least had support this time, so Tommy walked over to Paul, trying to look tough.

The teen heard the tail end of Paul’s conversation with Xisuma, trying to get any information he could. “-believe I can think of one or two things he could help with. I’ve tried with Scar and Cub, but they’re more free spirits.”

Paul nodded, then looked over as he noticed Tommy coming over. “Oh hey Tommy. Just talking with the admin here.”

“Yeah, just fucking call him Xisuma. None of that formal title shit.” Tommy said with venom in his voice.

Paul was a bit taken aback, but Xisuma had some clue on what was going on. “Tommy spent some time in a world with a… not so great admin. It affected his first meeting with me, and while we’ve helped out, recent events have brought up old wounds.”

Paul nodded like he understood completely and didn’t even try to argue. “Yeah, not every world has great people in charge. I’m not sure how long I spent making sure the worlds my kids were going to were safe. A few bad ones slipped through the cracks and have left me feeling horrible, so I can’t imagine how Phil must feel about missing one.”

Tommy scoffed. “He probably didn’t care about me getting in trouble. And Techno was fine on his own. Wilbur’s probably the only one he cared about.”

Paul frowned at that. “I’m sure that’s not true.”

Before he could say more, Tommy stopped him. “Oh really? He doesn’t really even care about you. Wil wrote him letters all the time and he read those. That’s why he even showed up to our world finally. But he didn’t read any of your fucking letters obviously.”

“I see. Well, I’m sure it was just-”

“It wasn’t just anything. Phil’s just a crap parent and looks like you’re pretty bad too.”

Xisuma slowly stepped away. He knew it wasn’t the best idea to get in Tommy’s way when he was yelling. Because normally that’s all it was, just yelling. If either person drew a weapon, then it was time to step in, but they had learned that Tommy was loud in general and yelled to get his frustration out.

“What would make you think that?”

“I mean, the way you acted to Grian. Did you have to be such a bitch about it?”

Paul sighed. “I’m not sure how much he’s told you about that world. It was-”

“Hardcore world, no respawns, ghosts existed, Grian got kept hostage by a friend and was abused a lot. If my admin was bad to me, this guy was somehow worse to Grian. Plus, I’m so fucking glad you wrote a letter to Phil and assumed Grian was fine when he disappeared. You could have fucking gone over and checked on him yourself bitch!”

“I was sort of on the other side of the world. And I also didn’t really have the time.”

“Then you could have made some fucking time! It was a family emergency and there was a murder involved. Anyone would let you off for that! I bet you just had a cushy life and couldn’t bother to lift a finger.”

Paul didn’t respond. He didn’t have a good answer. And even if he did, Tommy didn’t want to hear it. The teen stomped away, saying goodbye to everyone, though he specifically left Phil and Paul out of his goodbyes. Then he flew back to his ‘still just borrowing this’ base that was Grian’s old starter base and curled up in bed, pulling Tubbee into his arms.

He pressed his face into their fluff, muttering a few curses, the bee not having a care in the world about what was going on. It was just there to help give Tommy some comfort. Sure, he could always call Tubbo over and have him visit, but he didn’t have the energy and this was good enough.

Soon enough, Tommy was asleep, having worn himself out from both the party and shouting at Paul. He slept so much, he didn’t even wake up when he was poked a few times. Or when his face was drawn on. Or even when some TNT went off. It definitely had Tubbee awake, but it was still in his arms and couldn’t fly off.

“Aww, don’t worry. I’m not gonna kill him. That would tell people I’m here silly! My little pumpkin roll already made sure no one knows I came in, but he can’t do much with me actually here.” Tubbee buzzed a bit, earning a giggle from the visitor. “You know, maybe I can get my boys a pet. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if I took Rusty, now would he?”

The bee wasn’t able to respond, and despite Tommy being asleep, he rolled onto his other side, pulling Tubbee with him. “Oh, maybe I’ll see you later. But I’ve got to go find something now. Bye!”